#musings and ramblings

[demiclar]

Light Projections in the Red War

So I've been doing a bit of a deep-dive into the Red War Campaign for a fic over the last few months (ah how I miss her) and something occurred to me when I considered the Light and the Darkness and how they've both been portrayed and defined in the last few years. Now, D2 the Red War came out in like 2017, so maybe this is a case of a lack of planning and forethought, but if Bungie has shown us anything in the past few years of story content, it's that they really plan ahead, so I don't feel like that's it.

As a part of the initial D2 content, there was a series of missions for players to unlock their extra subclasses, for Warlocks you could do missions for Voidwalker and Stormcaller, for Titans it was Striker and Sunbreaker, for Hunters Gunslinger and Nightstalker (maybe they haven't gotten rid of these, it's been a long time since I've unlocked a subclass). On all of these quests, you'd go through the EDZ and towards the Shard of the Traveler and along the way you'd encounter a set of what Ghost called "Light projections," figures of either Guardians that used (or still do/at the time still did) wield the subclass you're trying to get, or are enemies that were defeated by Guardians that wield the subclass you're getting. They tell stories about themselves, or sometimes others tell you stories about Guardians that used the subclass you're getting, but they each are supposed to have some kind of lesson in them.

What gets me about this, though, is that these projections seem to go against everything we know about Light and Darkness from content like The Witch Queen. The Light is not a physical entity, that's fine, these projections seem to be manifestations of Light, we might be able to hear them, but they don't seem to exist per se or have any tangible mass. But, what's off about them is the fact that they're there at all. The Light, as we know it, makes a point to forget things. When Guardians are revived, they can't remember their past lives, their strength seems to come raw power, and maybe a few guns that get passed down, but nothing like this.

The Darkness, on the other hand, is grounded in memory, and things tangible. In Witch Queen we remade and restored objects using the Darkness, manipulating time itself. In Lightfall, we found the strings that tie the universe together and manipulated those. These projections then, feel a lot like the Darkness from Witch Queen, memories of Guardians past.

One theory could be that all of this takes place in a spot called the Dark Forest, emphasis on Dark. You move through the space, to the shard of the Traveler through a series of Taken portals, which seem to be pretty linked with Hive Darkness. Since the shard of the traveler is calling you to it, a question then arises, is the Shard making the portals appear? Does it have power over this Darkness? If that's the case, then maybe it's using Darkness to manifest these projections, but how does that work, because how can Light control Darkness? Not to mention, these projections, at least visually, seem to be built out of Light, not Darkness, aesthetically linked with all the depictions of Light we've seen at least in this campaign.

So, I don't get it. Maybe because this place is a meeting point of Light and Darkness it's just weird, but I'm having a very hard time making sense of these projections considering the context we've gotten over the past few years. I'd love to hear other people's thoughts on it!

[thedvilsinthedetails]

Sometimes growing from an experience is just taking a step back and going "wow, I'm so glad I'm nothing like you" and leaving it in your past. No fuss or allegorical lesson just like acceptance.

[cygwena]

Celebrating the first day of spring with a cold.

Thankfully I am not sick enough that I can't go outside for a little bit though. Just had some spicy marinated cucumbers with wontons and that helped a little.

Everyone I know is also sick, both in America and Finland.

[ichigotheringbearer]

just going about my day and then remembering that I lost 3900 runes in elden ring last night because I tripped and fell into an eight-foot-deep bit of water.

that was responsible wasn't it?

[sargasmicgoddess]

Hi. Not cerebral, but have you ever made a random connection with someone so strong on a night out or whatever where you’ve just had to follow it up somehow, or take action there and then?

I have this devil/angel inner-voice trauma in those situations and the angel always wins so I’m always left with wondering ‘what if’. One day I’ll have the balls to just say ‘fuck it’ and see what happens. Sigh.

Ever seen the movie Before Sunrise?

That's what I always think of when I think about random connections that just work.

Most of my life, I've followed my passions. Of the mind and of the heart. Professionally and personally. "What ifs" haunt me, and I've consciously tried to live a life where I don't have to say that a lot.

Granted, it takes me to other places that have made me say, "WTF is WRONG with me?!"* And "Am I clinically, diagnosably, INSANE?!"**

Other times, I get hurt wearing my heart on my sleeve by being vulnerable with connections, but that's a willing risk I take. I'd rather feel too much than nothing at all. But at the end of the day, I'm almost always happy I took chances.

I regret nothing. It has shaped me into the person I am today.

Obviously, idk your specific situation, so use your own best judgment.

But more than ever, I've embraced unexpected connections, experiences, and moments in my 40s. I hope you can find your happy medium too!

* everything. But I'm cool with it 🤣

**debatable. I'm sure you'll find me in the DSM somewhere 😬

[stellaheartwood]

I hardly ever write but today has been rainy and dreary outside so I thought I would write a little bit. How is everyone doing? HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!! So excited but Britt still hasn't come out to the fam. Don't know what I can do to help our stuck front host but I'll think of something.

[the-bluestockings-main-blog]

Did you ever hear a song when you were a kid that you never found the source of? You kinda knew some of the lyrics and the tune, but you couldn't find it online? You only heard it once or twice and never again? That was me with this one song. I think I last heard it on a radio in middle school. I barely remembered part of the chorus. It's been well over a decade, and then just now, at 12:20 pm, I FOUND IT.

I randomly clicked on a Switchfoot song that was recommended to me on YouTube, one part of that song sounded familiar, and I instantly remembered the old lost song and realized that it might be the same band. I Googled the band name along with the few lyrics I remembered, and there it was: the long-lost song. I'd finally found it.

It's a decent song, and I'm excited to have solved a years-long adolescent song-hunt, but more than that, I'm excited at the idea that things aren't truly lost - that the catchy song or book or poem or painting you remember from seeing/hearing it two times isn't gone forever. It reminds me of that Spenser quote: "For there is nothing lost, that may be found, if sought." I love the idea that things aren't just lost. They can be found.

And maybe not just media, but an old sense of self, an old interest, an old dream. They can come back, too. The whole reason I was recommended the Switchfoot song in the beginning was because I was listening to the old pop-punk bands I heard when I was younger. Adult-me wants some other things from those days to come back, too.

This was a great way to end the day. My adolescent self is triumphant. My current self is relieved and encouraged.

[neigepomme]

cw // NSFW. caleb loves when you control him.

caleb's a big man — in more ways than one. however, when he's near you? just an oversized ragdoll for you to manhandle as you please.

the first time he realized that, you were pointing at something for him to see. unfortunately, his attention was on something else, and after losing your patience, you tug at his necklace for him to lean down.

poor guy almost came on the spot. the action wasn't even remotely sexual, but the fact that you felt comfortable enough to boss him around, control him? oh that did caleb in.

somehow, you also caught on. his nervous smile and red ears were telltale signs that he was impacted, and boy, it was bound to be lots of fun for you.

so you tried it out more often. just some inconspicuous stuff to gauge his reactions! no harm in discovery, right?

when he was leaving for work, you'd roughly grab his face with one hand and bring him down to your level to press a kiss on his puckered lips. 

“have a lovely day at work, baby. go get 'em colonel!”

you spoke with the sweetest tone you could muster, and caleb's flushed face and lovestruck smile was a delight to see so early in the morning. wishing you a good day as well, he heads over to the fleet — only to find out he has a hard-on. caleb deals with it in his office, before heading out to train the cadets (who realize their ever so scary colonel is capable of sporting a smile).

the next instance was when you two were out and about in a supermarket, picking out the ingredients for hot pot tonight. you stare at caleb when an older gentleman heads your way with his cart, wobbling around — and a mischievous idea quickly forms in your head. you quickly tug caleb's arm, pressing his body against yours when you flash him a smile, “oops. a cart was headed your way. ”

the pilot can't maintain eye contact, his pants suddenly feeling way tighter than usual. you were going to be the death of him if you kept going, but caleb would be lying if he said that dying to your hands wasn't the best way to go.

the time that cemented it in both of your minds, though, was when you were straddling his lap and making out with him on the living room couch. caleb was taking over your mouth, kissing you like a starved man, and you desperately needed to catch your breath — so you tugged on his hair, hard, in order to separate him from your mouth.

his hips bucked up into yours when you did that, and as the realization hit him, a vicious red blush took over his face.

“fuck pips, you can't keep doing that.”

funnily enough, his words didn't exactly match his actions. when you tugged a little harder in response, his hands grabbed onto your hips and dragged you against his, your clothed core rubbing against his growing bulge. you moan against his ear when a sound between a whimper and a groan comes out of his mouth.

“hmm, but i think you love it, don't you?”

that might be the understatement of the century, caleb thinks. he doesn't just love it, he adores it when you play rough with him — so teasing and unfair, it makes him want to push your buttons, so you keep on doing it.

and that's exactly what he plans on doing when he throws you over his shoulder and starts walking towards the bedroom.

“i do. love it when you control me.”

🍎 pomme's notes — h.. hey.... alexa put on control me by colde....

[cygwena]

Help, I can't stop making my OCs high romance heroes and heroines.

[owlbelly]

so. i understand where the sentiment "listening to an audiobook is the same thing as reading the book" is coming from - i mean, yes, the bottom line is you are taking in the same words in what is possibly a more accessible (or maybe just more enjoyable) format for you! and i'm 100% in agreement that "book snobs" who say "no you didn't really read it" if you listened to the audiobook are full of shit. ofc you should engage with stories in whatever way works for you, there is no moral or intellectual superiority to reading words off a page vs. listening to them

but it also is different? an audiobook is a performance. choices a narrator makes about line readings can drastically influence the meaning of the lines. even just different voices, accents, etc. - there are creative choices being made by the person delivering the words to you, and that affects your experience of the story in a different way than if you were making those choices in your own head. it might even change the way you visualize what's going on!

this isn't a bad thing it's just An Actual Thing & i think it's worth talking about. it rubs me the wrong way when people act like accommodations (and for many people audiobooks are an accommodation) always result in a completely identical experience, or even that they should, & if you suggest that people accessing media in different ways are having different experiences it's somehow ableist

anyway on rare occasions i really enjoy audiobooks but mostly they are much less accessible to me than words on a page (i need to be able to reread, flip back and forth, go at my own pace) & i also just really strongly prefer to encounter a text on my own before hearing someone else's performance of it, if possible! again i don't think it's "better" to read a physical book i just think it is a Distinct form of experiencing a story & acting like the two things are entirely the same is sort of doing a disservice to both

[longlivethewildernessyet]

C.S. Lewis: oh and yeah, the stars are actually people who are functionally immortal (unless bitten by a witch who's shapeshifted into a snake) and come down to earth for rest periods wherein they look like normal humans and eat fire-berries until they can go be stars again, but they can be banished too and become magicians—

me: hold on

C.S. Lewis: keep up, there are also sea people (not mermaids) who have entire civilisations underwater, with dark purple hair and ivory skin, and they ride giant seahorses, and are very aggressive—

me: wait a second

C.S. Lewis: aren't you listening, because there is also a world underneath Narnia with many different sections, including one where Father Time sleeps until the end of the world, and a world underneath that called Bism where gems live and can be juiced like fruit—

me: just hang on a minute

C.S. Lewis: so you don't want to hear about how a centaur feeds both stomachs?

[thesargasmicgoddess]

Care for them because that is who you are.

You'll get hurt. Disappointed. Bruised. But you will get back up with lessons learned and memories made.

Don't dim your shine because it blinds those living in darkness.

Sometimes, they will gradually trust you enough to follow you into the light ❤️

“You’ll likely end up disappointed if you think people will care for you the way you care for them. Not everyone has your heart.”

— Unknown

[kaylynnwilde]

I wrote this for me, because it wouldn't get out of my head. I'm sharing it with you because it's fun and I want to fangirl about it with someone who's read it.

This shouldn't be that difficult to understand. Every book will appeal to different people. But if you never write the book and share it, you will never get to look back on it and say "I wrote that."

Every book is a learning process. With each one you write, you get better. Even if the only person who reads it is you, you did that. Be proud of yourself. Not everyone makes it even that far.

[thesargasmicgoddess]

An idle mind is the devil's playground....

I have nothing due tomorrow (well, technically today now). No high stress meetings. No crazy commitments. No work travel, speaking engagements, or press interviews. And here I am, 3am, wide awake and going through potato chips.

You'd think that having less to do would help me sleep, but my brain is apparently confused by the sudden lull in activity and stress level....and is looking for distractions 😂

Like, wtf? My brain has forgotten how to relax. God. I'm so weird. And wired, apparently, for no reason. 😂

now...to masturbate or work....?🤔

[lucabyte]

Different standards

[ghostcat96]

Is it weird that I feel so much more comfortable 'thirsting' for characters after I've realised I'm aroace? I have no idea if there's like, a psychological reason why realising I'm not actually attracted to the characters makes me more comfortable to talk about finding them attractive