#my coworkers were mad about game of thrones

[authenticcadence18]

If I had a nickel for every time a popular fantasy show ended on May 19th, 2019 in a way that was so disappointing it tarnished the show’s legacy forever….

…I’d have two nickels!!! which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice, right?

[thran-duils]

Was Ich Liebe (P.2)

Title: Was Ich Liebe (Part Two) Summary: Fem!Reader x Dark!Tony Stark.  Tony becomes enamored with a stripper at a club his hedonistic friend Thor owns. A casual sexual relationship quickly becomes possessive and the reader sees more of the underground mafia life than she would like to. The cherry on top is that Tony is married and so is she. Him to a woman who has no intention of losing her throne at any cost and the reader to a deadbeat alcoholic. Feeling trapped by both her previous life and the suffocating hold Tony is trying to put on her, the reader steals away in the night, which is not going to go over well. Words: 3,461 Warnings (for whole fic, more may be added): Dub-con, smut, infidelity, stripping, vaginal fingering, public sex, possessive behavior, angst, degradation kink, violence, physical abuse, domestic violence, language, drug use, alcoholism, death Author’s Note: As usual, this is 18+.

Part One || Part Three || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

You struggled against Tony’s hold, both your hands coming to grasp at his hand that was around your throat.

“Let me go!” you gasped, kicking at him.

He looked serious, his face close.

“Are you going to behave? I don’t need you freaking the fuck out,” Tony asked.

You nodded, “Yes. Yes! I’ll behave!”

Tony’s grip loosened on your throat, and you took the opportunity to shove him away. You bolted towards the front door aiming to get outside and back down the stairs. You got the door open a few inches before large hands closed down on your arms and yanked you back away from the doorframe. Tony wheeled you around and threw himself against the front door, using his momentum to slam it closed with his body weight.

“Let me go!” you protested again, trying to desperately get out of his grasp. “Let me go, you fucking bastard!”

You yanked again and suddenly Tony let go of you and with your own thrust you fell down onto the ground, barely catching yourself from hitting your face.

“Oops,” he told you coolly.

You heard the front door lock as you began to push yourself up again. You saw boots in your sights and craned your neck to look up. Carol was standing there, her arms crossed, ready to intercept you.

Tony began as he stalked around you, “No one is going to miss Michael. No one is going to come looking for him. He had no real friends, and he didn’t work. So who really gives a shit if he’s dead? You?”

His tone was challenging, as if he was hoping you would say yes. Argue with him. Admit to him that you had affection for any man besides him just to give him an excuse. He was riled up and he wanted even more reason to unleash his wrath.

Instead, you stayed quiet, still.

“Okay, so no one cares about him. Who is grateful that he’s gone? Is my perfect angel happy about it?”

Still, you were silent, your fingers digging into the hardwood.

Tony chuckled at your defiance. “Baby, don’t make me work for it. I’ve already used a lot of energy tonight. And on far less precious things than you.”

You sat up quickly, pushing yourself back up onto your knees to face him. The three of them – him, Rhodes, and Carol – were alert, watching you, ready to tackle you back down. You huffed, brushing off your dress. You had merely thrown it on after work to get home in. Tony relaxed ever so slightly seeing you were staying still.

“Are you going to kill me too?” you sneered at him, meeting his gaze. “Is that what this is?”

Tony’s expression darkened.

He was on you in a second, wrenching you off the ground by the back of your dress, his hand wound up in the fabric. You floundered, trying to get traction with your feet, your hands grabbing at the wall to steady yourself. Tony half dragged you down the hallway and tossed you into the bathroom. You stumbled, catching yourself on the sink. In the mirror, you caught sight of Michael finally; where he really was. His body mangled and bleeding in your tub. A strangled cry left your throat as Tony slammed the bathroom door closed behind him. He grabbed the back of your neck and forced you in a 180 closer to where Michael was unnaturally lying in the tub. He would not let you look away.

“Look at that. All your troubles gone. Thanks to me. And you are not being appreciative.”

All you could muster was gasped breaths.

“I have done so much for you, and you are just so ungrateful. What do you have to say for yourself? Apart from being a defiant little slut?”

“I…I…” you were paralyzed by a combination of fear and revulsion at the sight of the blood.

Tony snorted in disgust before you were bent over the counter again, his hand at the small of your back. He kicked one of your legs out, forcing himself in between your legs. The sound of his zipper coming down was deafening and the head of his cock rested on the top of your ass.

“You’ve always got me so hard, sweetheart,” he husked.

He tore your underwear down and drove up into you. You whined at the intrusion and he just shoved deeper. Without a condom.

“Tony! I’m not on the pill!”

“I know you aren’t,” he husked. “That’s perfectly okay, baby, isn’t it? I would be such a good father, wouldn’t I?”

“Tony—"

His hand snaked around your throat, holding tight, choking off your protest as he pumped. Your hips dug into the counter painfully. He was as aggressive as ever, riding you raw.

Tony’s breath was hot on your ear. “I’m never letting you go.”

<><><>

“Mad” by PRINCESSBRI ended as you spread your legs, lying on your back on the stage.

You heard cheers as “Bitch” by Allie X started and knew Kiara was coming out to do a double feature with you. She straddled you starting off the song, dancing down your body to slide off and go to the pole. The tips were good and the two of you laughed in the back room, throwing the wads onto the vanity.

“Daddy is here,” one of the girls whispered in your ear quickly. You turned to meet her gaze and she told you, “I tried to take him, but he asked for you.”

Sighing, you pushed away from the vanity.

Tony had only given you a handful of days alone and now he was right back at it. They had cleaned up the body from your apartment and when you had sat on the couch, holding yourself close when they removed it, Tony informed you he was going to find you a place to live. You could only assume he was here now to tell you where that was going to be.

Sliding into the booth, you were stiff. Your coworker had followed you, waiting to take an order for drinks and Tony had ordered for the two of you, not asking you what you wanted.

He nipped at your ear, “Baby, I don’t like you being off standish with me.”

“How can I not be?” you asked.

“Don’t be afraid of me,” he murmured against your skin, his lips trailing softly along your shoulder. “I would never hurt you. Never you. I got rid of him for you. And now you are free. And free means going on vacation with me.”

“Vacation?”

“Yes. I already bought the tickets for us.” You pulled away and furrowed your brow. He smiled and kissed you. “Seychelles.”

“What?”

Tony smirked, his hand reaching out to grab his drink. His arm tightened around you, and he said, “Seychelles. Fregate specifically. It’s a group of islands in east Africa.”

“I know that, Tony. But you bought me tickets? You do know I have to request time off work right?”

He downed the remainder of his drink, knowing another one was on its way. He laughed at your response, condescending. “You know I have sway with Thor, right? There will be a private villa… a private infinity pool in that villa… a very… very, very big bed.” He laid another kiss. “A hammock on the property for you to relax in.”

“I’m not sure.”

“You’re not sure about what?” he asked, his voice dangerous.

“I just wanna be at home.”

“It’s not going to be home after this weekend.” You snapped your head towards him, and he smiled. “Oh, that got your attention… no, it’s not yours anymore. You know, love, I wanted you to be enjoying the beach with me as your things were moved out of that shit hole of a place. You wouldn’t even have to worry about it. You could be naked on the sand, my lips blessing you while your clothes were moved.”

“Tony—”

“I hope a thank you is following that.”

You bit your tongue. He had already told you he was not going to let you go. And he was already forcing your hand to move, he had killed your husband.

A soft “Thank you” fell from your lips.

“You’re welcome, sweetheart,” he whispered, resting his chin on your shoulder. He pulled a key out of his pocket and waved it in front of you as the shots came to the table. “Here, perfect. Celebratory shots. Just in time for your new apartment key. And baby, I’m gonna make sure we christen that new bed of yours.”

<><><>

The room was foreign, the bed not broken in. And yet Tony made you feel like you should be on your back on the bed, like you belonged in the room to please him. He straddled you, holding you down, your arms pinned, his cock in your face. He was stroking himself quickly, readying to empty all over your face.

“Say it. Say it, baby,” he demanded in a strained tone.

Knowing better than to disobey by now, you looked up at him, your lashes heavy with the sultry look you were giving him. “I’m yours. I belong to you.”

His hand stroked faster, his hips jolting with the movement, moving you in turn with you trapped beneath him.

“Take it like the little whore you are.” His cum was warm, coating your face. You closed your eyes and still he strung all over your cheeks. “Yeah, you love being covered in my cum…”

Tony pressed his cock back past your lips, your eyes opening again at the intrusion. He encouraged in a husk, “Suck it. Gently now. Good girl. Show me how happy you are to be here safe in this new apartment.”

You did as he asked, your lips wrapped tight. He pushed his cum from your cheeks into your mouth and you swallowed, wanting to just bite his fingers in protest as he pressed them in. But you were playing the long game.

<><><>

You thumbed the coat Tony had told you to wear. He had bought it specifically for the party. Just long enough to cover the curve of your ass. Along with the bondage type lingerie you were wearing underneath, pasties and all. He had invited you to a private sex party and he was ready to take you in a room where people could pop in and watch him having his way with you.

At the door, your coat was taken, and you were just in the lingerie which was no different to you than being at the club. But you had a mask on now as did Tony. And to your immense shock, he undressed right then and there, already hard, adding his clothes to your coat check, mind the small baggy he took out of the pocket which was not missed by you. He pulled you along with him as you walked past people engaging in foreplay and socializing with each other.

He led you upstairs and into a private room marked 4. The bed was large, and he pulled you onto it with him.

Holding up the small baggy he smiled, “You ready to roll?” Without waiting for your response, he took one out of the bag. Tony popped the pill and held out his opposite hand with one for you.

“Is this molly?”

“Mhm… MDMA.”

“That’s what I meant.”

“I know. And you’re gonna be so fucking wet,” Tony told you, sucking at your neck. His lips dominated yours, pressing his tongue past your lips, swirling around yours. The kiss was deep, powerful. He bit at your lip as he pulled away. “That’s why I have this private room.” He noticed your expression and he ran his thumb over your plump lips. “Just behave, baby, and I won’t punish you by sending you out for a time out.”

“Well, people are going to be coming in here so…”

“You’re used to that, right?”

“I’m used to dancing for entertainment. Not getting railed for the entertainment.”

“I’ll be happy to pop that cherry for you… let them see how trained you are for me. How many times you’ll come undone around me.” He inhaled deeply and traced along your side, dipping in with the curves, in and out. “I love showing you off as mine. My wife is very jealous of you.”

“That makes me feel comfortable,” you mumbled sarcastically, grabbing a pill out of his open hand, and popping it in your mouth.

Tony chortled pleased seeing you bend to his will and take the drug, nuzzling his mouth into your neck, leaving rough bites.

“She’s just jealous because she has responsibilities and your only one is to please me.” Tony’s hand slipped up between your legs, forcing between your thighs. “She’s dealing with the matriarch role… mothering our child… working out… sweettalking the cops whenever they decide to show their ass. She’s really good at that.”

“Will I have to do that? Talk to cops, I mean?” That was a legit concern.

Tony hummed against you, “Maybe.” You stiffened and he ran his hands down your sides. “Oh, shh, sweetheart. I trust you. You won’t betray me. You just keep that beautiful mouth of yours closed and brush them off, giving them your beautiful doe eyes, and it’ll be just fine. No one can be mean to you when you look at them like the little sweet, innocent thing you are. I could just devour you.”

“Well, just make sure you don’t lose me when we both start rolling.”

“That’s what Carol is for. She won’t let you wander off on me. She’s gonna be right outside.. She’ll keep us both in check. It’s gonna feel so fucking good to take you. Every brush of your soft skin against me, knowing all the people that could be watching from the doorway. Those perfect holes of yours allowing me in…” Tony had started to grind, hungry. “Every hole… mine to use.”

His thumb slipped up towards your tight ring and he smiled against your lips. “I should get that lube, shouldn’t I?”

You nodded. “Yes. Please.”

Even if you fell completely under the drug, you knew you would feel it in the morning. So, precaution and prevention was important.

He pecked your nose, “Mhm, just for you, baby. Just keeping you safe always. I don’t wanna hurt my favorite.”

The lube was cold as he pushed his thumb in and your breath hitched. He was watching your expression closely.

“Relax,” he purred. “Let me in, sweetheart. I’ve got a nice toy to gape you out.” You shifted a little at that and his free hand came to hold you in place, his eyes flashing. “I’m gonna be moving in between those holes however I see fit. Be grateful I’m prepping.” He smacked you across the ass and said, “Just behave like the good girl I know you can be, and this will be enjoyable for everyone.”

<><><>

“I’m being perfectly fucking civil,” Tony spat.

He had been anything but civil since the group of you had come into the meeting room. You had arrived there first, waiting for the other people to arrive. Tony had mumbled something about having to be in charge and be an example as he pulled you down at the table next to him.

Natasha snorted and he shot her an annoyed look. “Tony, I would call this whole attitude you’re having anything but civil.”

Tony’s attention was on you, and he said strained, “Y/N, dear. Can you be a doll and make me another drink?” You nodded, standing up and grabbing his glass. His hand traced your thigh as you walked away, squeezing as it was about to drop away. You went to the counter quickly where there was the bottle he had brought.

When you sat back down, he took the glass from you and kissed you on the nose. “I love you, baby.”

“I love you,” you said back. It was a lie. But you passed it off with as much sincerity as you could muster, and it seemed to pay off. You hated him. You hated what he had done and how he kept you under his thumb.

He gripped your chin, giving you a little shake with an amused smirk.

“Glad you’ve got some type of deterrent from completely snapping during this meeting, Tony,” Barnes muttered unamused from the side of the table.

“Y/N has seen me completely snap, Barnes. So, she’s not here to stop it. She’s here to help me find my humanity afterward. How could I not be drawn in by her to ground me again?” Tony retorted. You bit your cheeks and he chucked you underneath your chin, taking a deep drink. “You’re always going to be my favorite, sweetheart. My favorite toy.”

His appreciation was cut short as the door opened and men started filing in. But his grip only tightened around your waist, yanking you closer to him.

Carol exhaled her smoke, staring across the table at the men. They actually looked afraid of her.

“You had to bring the weapon of mass destruction?” one of the men joked darkly.

“What kind of party would it be without me, Fredrick?’ Carol asked.

The man – Fredrick – shook his head and he looked back at Tony. “So, right to business. Our shipment went through to you. So I’m not sure why this meeting is being called?”

Tony took another long swig and he pushed you away from him on the bench you were sitting on. You frowned deeply but Steve grabbed your arm, pulling you off the bench, completely away from Tony. You stared up at him in confusion.

“Oh, we both know why this meeting was called,” Tony said in a dangerously calm voice.

“Care to enlighten me?”

Fredrick was trying to keep his voice calm, but you could detect the nervousness.

Tony’s hand flew under the table, unholstering a gun. Guns were pointed at the two men Fredrick had brought with him and you froze to the spot, terrified. Carol was the most steady, looking happy to be pointing the gun.

Seeing the worry on Fredrick’s face, Tony smirked. But he did not relent on his aim. “Now, I know I got screwed on that last shipment. There were two kilos missing. And that is a lot to be missing considering I fucking paid for it! And it’s not fucking cheap!”

He unloaded some bullets into the man. You yelped, covering you mouth as blood splattered the wall behind him as he fell out of his chair. Steve held you close, making sure you did not bolt.

Tony pointed his gun at the man standing directly behind Fredrick’s corpse, and he stiffened up even more seeing the gun pointed at him. “You. What’s your name?”

“F-Fernandez.”

“F-Fernandez,” Tony replied mockingly. “You work for him for a while?” The man nodded quickly. “Perfect. You’re in charge now. Now go back and tell your operation that they better find my two fucking missing kilos or I’m gonna put a bullet between your eyes next!”

“What the fuck are you still doing sitting there?” Carol demanded.

The men all scrambled up from their chairs and made a beeline out of the room. As soon as they were gone, and Tony lowered his gun, Steve let you go.

Tony took notice of you and smiled, “Oh, sweetheart. When they find that missing money, I’m going to put a down payment on a new car just for you.”

You forced a smile, making him think you were happy about the idea. Little did he know, you were already planning your escape.

<><><>

You left not only the keys to the new Tesla but also to the apartment on the kitchen counter.

Storming away from the kitchen, Tony went to your bedroom. He went right to the top left drawer of your dresser, where he knew you kept all your jewelry. He found it empty.

Tony slammed the drawer closed, laughing darkly to himself.

Little bitch had not forgotten all the jewelry he had bought her. Of course not. She was a spoiled little brat.

Furiously, he stormed across the hallway, ignoring the looks from Carol, Steve, and Rhodes down the hallway by the kitchen. He went into the bathroom and slammed the door closed. He needed to go to the bathroom.

Just go to the bathroom and relax just a little.

Releasing himself from his slacks, he sighed in contentment as he began to go to the bathroom.

As he finished though, he opened his eyes and caught sight of something.

He spotted the positive pregnancy test on top of the trash.

~~~

Song list to set the mood for me while writing:

Mad -- PRINCESSBRI Bitch -- Allie X

Marvel tags: @coconutqueen21 @undecidedsworld @holl2712 @agustdowney  @biiskuitx @buttercupfangirl

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

if you have a question about aussie slang, for a fic or whatevs, please just ask i don't know all of it, but we do have some fun words and sayings that are day to day statements

esp. the more rural you go

not everyone has the full accent though, because you do get a lot of pressure at work to come across... professional or whatever.

the only one i've never been sure of being an Actual Phrase, or if it Became A Phrase after popularisation on a tv show, is "Stone the Flaming Crows" bc a dude from Neighbours used to say it frequently.

examples of day to day stuff i can think of right now

mad as a frog in a sock (angry about something, went off, off the shits)

mad as a cut snake (usually means 'they're nuts', but can also mean they exploded with anger, usually contextual)

she'll be right (it's fine - can be a flippant statement, can be reassurance, etc)

drongo / galah - (idiot, not very smart, wanker, etc)

dunny = toilet

thunderbox/outhouse / long-drop - usually outdoor toilet

dry as a nun's nasty / dry as a dead dingo's donger (I am thirsty, or It Is Hot AF/we need rain so bad)

chuck a u-ey (do a u-turn)

Oi! (Hey I want your attention/i was surprised, general exclamation, stop that, you are in a lot of fucking trouble mate - depends on the tone of voice and volume) like "OI!" says aunty ruth has just found her dentures in jello and she knows you did it, etc

Bugger off (go away, or sometimes a statement of disbelief)

Yeah nah /Nah yeah (can mean yes, no or maybe depending on what was said directly before the statement)

you cant pull the wool over my eyes - you can't lie to me like that / i can see you are not telling the truth

shut your gob / put a sock in it / put a cork in it - (shut up / shut the FUCK up / close your mouth or i will shut it for you) depends on tone

Ya wally (you idiot)

Roo = kangaroo

o = can be affixed to anything to shorten it at the servo - gone to the service station, arvo - afternoon, smoko - morning tea, bottlo - where the grog is

goon/goonsack - wine in a box

grog - alcohol

stubbie - beer, ususally

boardies - board shorts

rashie - swimming shirt,

slip, slop, slap - ancient proverb for avoiding sunburn. singing pelican.

thongs - footwear

sheila = female / woman, don't hear this a lot at the moment tbh except in certain contexts or from specific people

'Getting rowdy' = things are heating up, people are riled up, a fight is about to/has just broken out, etc.

DJ's like a mad cunt = one very specific meme about a bad PM we had like 10 years ago. i can't tell you how many PM's ago, it's been game of thrones here lmao

Beyond the black stump / Out whoop-whoop / references to timbuktu (quite a distance away)

strewth!/crickey!/bloody hell - (exclamation of surprise, expletive replacement, etc)

flat out like a lizard drinking (tired / drunk / exhausted / sleeping)

pull a harry holt - (I've heard a dozens variations of this one, it means Go Missing / Disappear, often used as a joke. PM Holt went swimming one day and disappeared)

have a stickybeak (to poke your nose in/investigate/look around)

chuck a wobbly/throw a tanty/chuck a tanty/throw a wobbly (throw a tantrum, i have legit never seen anyone successfully deescalate a situation by telling someone not to chuck a wobbly or throw a tanty, go figure lmao)

bogan - (very specific kind of low-income, generally white, people. sort of like rednecks, but with more stereotypical aussie features like a mullet, singlet tops, sunnies, stubbies, etc. tend to fall under the liberal party ideology - who are our republicans... )

ankle-biters / rugrats / little takkers / gremlins / nippers - (kids, usually the littler ones)

tiff - argument, small fight (had a tiff, had a row)

pav = pavlova

piss/whizz/take a piss = going to pee

vegemite - delicious

Kiwi = New Zealander

Banana benders - the disrespectful bs that apparently other states call anyone living in Queensland, the wankers

station - farming areas that have sheep or livestock usually, have farmhands etc.

dole bludger(s) - (anyone on Centrelink, whether they want to be or not, with no other employment. but like, a lot of people on centrelink have a job that does not cover enough and need additional financial supports to meet a minimum wage, or are students or apprentices, etc. there are people who go on centrelink on and off to avoid engaging in the jobseeking stuff, they are the real dole bludgers, but a lot of richer people tend to call anyone on 'welfare' bludgers)

don't you come the raw prawn with me - (do not lie to me / don't try that shit with me, mate / I wasn't born yesterday /etc)

dak/dack - to dack someone is to come up behind them and yank their pants down (or skirts). Often taking out your boxers, too.)

budgie smugglers - (speedoes, male swimwear)

togs/toggs or cozzie (swimwear, any kind. cozzie = costume)

mozzie - (mosquito)

better than a kick up the backside /better than a kick in the arse - (pretty self explanatory, one of those phrases parents use to get slightly hurt kids to start laughing and/or coworkers to commisserate about new work rules, etc)

I wouldn't piss on (name) if they were on fire - (self-explanatory, you hate them, or they're a useless tit or an insufferable person /a suckup etc, and you would gladly hand them a match)

one for the road = getting a drink for the road, usually. can also make a joke of it like, "one last piss for the road" = I'm going to the bathroom before I leave

here's your handbag, what's your hurry - probs not an aussie phrase but a common joke in my family

----------------

So like, there's some words and items from Australian Indigenous culture that often get used wrong in stereotypical characters, like saying 'gone walkabout', using 'cooee', making digeridoo jokes, and making some really uncomfy 'savages' statements can be very disrespectful. You might want to go looking into Australia's fucked up policies and historical (and only recent) situations before starting any arguments about this stuff... in many ways it mirrors the cruelty of american colonisers to native american peoples, etc.

Avoid some phrases. Your character gone to cool their head? He's gone off on to soak his head, or he's on his bike (gone away) but he'll be back... You can use 'Oi, dickhead!'

Please don't mock the names of towns or places, they are often the names from the traditional custodians and inhabitants.

-----------------

Random things:

We drive on the left side of the road, driver's side reversed.

More of our cars are automatic than manual. Utes aren't atypical, but bigger vehicles are out in rural areas because more than a few of the rural roads are poorly maintained or dirt, with potholes that yoyo your soul into your body.

If you have a character on a long drive on a non-highway, or rural road: +if you are on a one-lane road and someone is comingthe other way, you both move half-on, half-off; for big vehicles or trucks, you can choose to pull off completely and stop. Just for safety, esp. in rain, fog, mist or late at night. +at one-lane bridges, you have a give way sign on one side. if you want your characters to have a moment of 'pause to look at each other while driving' or 'a quiet moment of reflection', have them wait for another car or truck to pass from the other side. These can be a few metres long, to like, a really long bridge. +They may pass markers that say 'flood level marker' with numbers of 2, 3 or 5 metres. Could be useful to remark on if your fic needs a reason for them to have a crisis. +Bushfire warning signs (from Low to Catastrophic) are frequent +Animal Crossing signs are very frequent, and often have a wildlife rescue number on them +Water restriction signs are in most small towns, they range from levels 1 to 6. This can change what the characters are allowed to do with water in little towns, etc. +You may occasionally find a small servo and one or two houses. +pubs don't open/won't serve alcohol until after 10am. the joke has always been, 'beer on your cornflakes' but you will never be able to actually get that unless you preplanned the night before in your hotel room. +Around dawn and dusk, a lot of animals like hares, kangaroos, wallabies, sometimes echidnas and koalas and little numbat things, and snakes and bushmice will be close to the road. Sometimes dashing across. They do not react logically to cars approaching, and will leap out at random. Hares do this zigzag nonsense. If you need the character to hit the brakes frantically, or swerve, this is a good reason. If you are ever driving here and see an animal on the side of the road, flip lights to low beam, slow down and watch to see how they react. If you can. If there's a truck blaring down on you, you may not be able to.

+Emus are in more rural areas. Echidnas sometimes appear on fringes of towns though.

+Kookaburras are a lovely creature, I have rescued a few and they are nice... but their laugh is very grating when it goes off super early in the morning. They eat snakes (good) and baby birds (not so good).

+Lots of snakes round here. LOTS. Carpet Snakes are pretty common, red-belly black snakes, eastern brown (big danger!!!), whip snakes have declined in my region, keelback snakes, this one black and white banded one we found deceased, etc. Snakes can climb, snakes can SWIM. Putting something that stinks around a campsite MAY help, but not always.

+Never go swimming in a dam you don't own, and that hasn't been checked, and if no one knows where you are. How deep is it? What's on the bottom? How stirred is the water? etc.

+Kangaroos CAN drown you. They have perfected this attack, and will do it to humans, dogs and other pursuers alike. They can also eviscerate you with their hind paws or shatter your ribs with a kick. The 'boxing' they do is exceptionally violent. This seems to surprise people, but like, giraffes can kill each other by slamming their heads into each other, you think a 7 ft swole motherfucking cryptid can't do harm? They can be lovely tho, if they trust you. But DO NOT GO PETTING WILDLIFE.

+Dropbears, austrilanicus vericanthus bitus, are real. We do make jokes about them, but they are a Problem. The pee on yourself thing won't ward them off, that's more about working out which tourists are the most gullible (and if they run with it, the moistest) lmao. Akubras and other thicker-layered headwear,

+We have wild dogs and feral pigs. Do not fuck with the feral pigs, some are HUGE, and no... they're not just pigs who escaped farms, these are MASSIVE motherfuckers who will Get You if they See You. Rustling in the night outside the tent? Good Luck.

+Koalas should not be picked up directly. They have claws, and a lot of them have chamydia. I mean if a character saves one in a fic that's fine I guess, but like... someone's getting antibiotics after that lmao. They are bigger than you think, dumber than you think, and sometimes they have to be chased across a highway with a windscreen cover bc they're not very bright and keep failing to climb metal fences, lmaoooo

+Towns of about 20-30k will have more shops (some franchise, some local owned), servos, fast food places and usually at least two to three shopping centres. Usually small level entertainments like a cinema, or local groups. +Towns with 10-20k, may have one or two major shopping centres, servos (tracks and RVs catered to), possibly a maccas, and the majority of stores will be local-owned. May have a cinema, but not one that has the newest releases. Local council may have more festivals, or 'that one thing they're known for'. +0-10k towns have a small local store, prices usually a bit higher. A servo, often with capacity for trucks. Local festivals. Characters can cop a bit of side-eye in these places, esp. if they don't fit the traditional ideas or are loud/violently american. +Grey nomads are a thing. Old people with fancy caravans who drive So Slow, and move all around aus. Several refused to stop during covid and it was like, WHO DO YOU THNK WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP ALIVE BY STOPPING YOU MOVING THROUGH MULTIPLE TOWNS???

+Some rural areas have legit red dirt, its always super cool to look at. Some places have light brown to dark brown, some have more chalky colours or yellowish dirt. Depends.

+Reminder: Australia has very specific gun laws, if your character/s have weapons then they may need to be sneaky or store them specifically in the vehicle. Although if you're talking about like, mad max type rules, then who cares. But if you have them get into a gun fight in a town, the police will come, etc.

Dunno, just ask if you have a question... just trying to think of random things to paint a picture if you have a character over here for a roadtrip or mission or whatever.

[lovelyirony]

For the otp ask, can you please do either samsharon or helensharon?

i’ll make another post for you for helensharon, my love! 

Coffee shop AU: Who is the barista, and who frequents the coffee shop?

Sam needs money for his college, and Sharon is always at the coffee shop, although chances are she’s stolen her cousin’s credit card to pay for coffee and ends up buying Sam lunch from a place a block over because he once admitted that he didn’t have time to grab lunch from going to class to work. 

Sharon gets all the fancy syrups, and occasionally Bucky drops by to make fun of how “in love” Sam is, which earns him a wack on the head and Sam furiously denying it while Sharon remains oblivious, headphones on. 

Highschool/College AU: Who is the straight-A student, and who’s the backrow slacker?

I don’t think either of them would really slack so to speak, but Sam takes education far more seriously. Sharon doesn’t, but she takes her “extracurricular” activities seriously. They balance each other out, and help each other when necessary. Sharon forever packs more pens in her bags so that Sam won’t blow a gasket when he loses his fifteenth, and Sam always gets her more water. 

Rivals to loves AU: Who takes their rivalry seriously, and who is half in it just to push the other’s buttons?

Sam absolutely takes their rivalry seriously. Sharon honestly cannot remember when it started or why, which makes it all the more frustrating. 

“You’re cute when you’re mad,” Sharon says, leaning into Sam’s space. He feels his cheeks heat up. (He’s going to say it’s indignation.) 

“Am not!” 

Enemies to lovers AU: Which one switches sides?

I’m going to make this Absolutely Not Serious. 

Sharon works as a waitress for the manager across the street, and even though it sucks, she doesn’t want to switch restaurants because she only has to deal with her coworkers for...shit. Maybe it’s pride. 

And then her friend Steve moves back into town and tells her that he got a job as a manager of the restaurant, and he said that he’s bringing his friend Sam. 

So there she goes, to the other restaurant. Although she and Sam immediately become enemies on sight. Sharon because she’s used to holding multiple plates and doing about four jobs in one because her old restaurant was just. Not Good. 

And Sam tells her to “relax.” 

What a little bitch. Sharon decides to hate him, and Sam says ‘alright’ and doesn’t really read into it. 

At least, until she’s stressed one day because they had a “surprise twenty-people reservation” and she’s tired and the group sucked and didn’t tip so Sam makes her a meal. And well? Perhaps they don’t really need an enemy type thing. And he does clean up nice at the staff holiday party...

Soulmate AU: Who is eager to meet their soulmate? Who absolutely does not want to meet their soulmate?

Sharon likes her job. She doesn’t think a soulmate is necessary, and she doesn’t really want to meet hers. (This is a lie. But she remembers all of the agents who didn’t come home. She doesn’t want that.) 

But then...Sam’s different. He’s not a civilian. He is also very enthusiastic about soulmates, and Sharon can actually see them together. She’s warming up to it. 

Single parent AU: Which one is the single parent? (Alt. if they’re both single parents: Which one is open to starting a new relationship from the start? Which one is never planning on finding love again… Until they meet the other and are instantly smitten?)

Sam is done with romance, so he thinks. He and his kid have just moved, they got into a nice school, and he’s ready to just focus on packing school lunches. 

And then there’s the leader of sorts, Sharon. He’s honestly expecting a smiling woman who will absolutely be judgmental of everything he does. 

What he gets is a woman who half-falls out of her car, is wearing ripped jeans with a nice blazer, and has a brilliant smile. 

“Sorry about the fall, new shoes. Anyways, I’m hosting a beginning-of-fall party. You and your kid wanna come?” 

Doctor AU: Which one is the longsuffering doctor? Which one is the patient?

If Sharon would quit coming in for stitches or casts or anything, that’d be great. 

Honestly, Sam isn’t even suffering, but all of his colleagues are. He’s lovestruck and refuses to tell her to stop getting so damn hurt so that he can date her, and so his coworkers make it a mission to find another suitable doctor that she can go to so that Sam will stop sulking the day after each visit. 

Bodyguard AU: Who is the bodyguard? Who are they protecting? Which one is secretly pining for the other?

Sam is the bodyguard, and he didn’t even think he’d honestly get assigned. Sharon’s the First Daughter, although she’s not even in-house living. But they tell her to follow her, and so they make a game out of cat-and-mouse. 

Sam isn’t expecting Sharon to be so good at eluding his gaze, and Sharon isn’t expecting him to catch on so quickly. 

Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

Sharon walks with the swagger of someone who knows exactly why they have a reputation for being one of the best thieves in all the land. Sam is a prince who is honestly over the monarchy, and knows that if he leaves, the next in line is his cousin Rhodey, who would honestly suit the throne much better. (Plus his boyfriend has an eye for decor.) 

So when he sneaks onto the ship, Sharon grins. 

“This is going to be fun, isn’t it?” 

“At the very most, entertaining.” 

Childhood best friends AU: Which one was super obviously in love with the other the whole time? Who was oblivious until they were older?

Sharon was in love. She was all knees and messy ponytails, and Sam was always the popular kid who got along with everybody and had an easy nature about himself. He was a star academic and athlete, and Sharon was the girl in the background who kept getting into fights and would double-triple-quadruple text him into getting shakes at ten-thirty on a Tuesday night. 

She loves him. Probably more than she should, because she knows that so many other girls put on extra lipstick in hopes he’ll notice, or ask about his scores and his interests and she’s been annoying him for the last fifteen minutes with cursed images. 

She doesn’t have a chance in hell. 

(Or does she?) 

[babybluebanshee]

Things I’ve had to deal with as a city librarian, pt. who even knows anymore

Some of these are because Covid makes everyone’s lives a little harder. Others are just weirdos being weirdos. 

But they’re all equally baffling.

- The library has a mask mandate. You either wear one the entire time you’re in the building, or you leave. It’s that simple. The amount of people who fight us on this is staggering. One lady accused me of trying to force her into a panic attack for whatever reason, and then told me she’d have me fired because she was going to complain to the city coordinator. I didn’t feel like telling her the city coordinator was the one who wrote the policy about masks. She’d figure it out.

- We have a basket of disposable masks by all the doors for people to take if they don’t have one or forget theirs. A guy (already wearing a mask, mind) came in, grabbed all the masks out of one of the baskets, flipped through them like they were a deck of cards, then stuck them back in the basket. Then he locked eyes with me to let me know he’d done it on purpose. We had to throw them all away. 

- We haven’t been putting out the newspapers we’re subscribed to, because we don’t really have a way to effectively and properly sanitize them when patrons are done with them. A guy came in wanting to read them, and when we explained to him why they weren’t out, he turned red in the face, telling us that was unacceptable and he demanded we give him the papers. The director decided to let him have them, and we’d just quarantine them when he was finished, so we asked him which ones he wanted. He wanted all the papers from the day we closed to that current day. We closed back in March. This was happening June. He spent maybe fifteen minutes looking through this huge stack of newspapers, gave them back, and didn’t even fucking thank us.

- We had all eight seasons of Game of Thrones on DVD, and they’ve always been really popular. There was one woman who was absolutely obsessed with them. Every week, she’d check some out, then out another on reserve so it would be ready when she brought the one she had back. When other people would put them on reserve and she had to wait, she’d get angry because she put it on reserve! Why wasn’t it there yet?! And she never watched the seasons in order. She’d start with season two, then skip to season six, then back to one, then to four, and when she’d cycled through them? She’d start over. It was a little unsettling how into it she was.

- A girl, probably about eleven or twelve, came in with what I can only describe as the world’s worst grandma. The old biddy was insanely dismissive of everything the kid showed interest in. The kid spotted some graphic novels and mentioned how much she like reading them, and the grandma scoffed and was like “You mean you like looking at the pictures.” The kid mentioned the Goosebumps series and grandma goes, “Ugh, those books are terrible, pick something else. Something good.” We introduced a book box for teens recently, and when the kid saw the sign for that, she sounded interested. Grandma just went, “That’s stupid. Why don’t you pick your own books? And crafts are for children.” To the girl’s credit, she didn’t seem to let the sour old bitch get to her, but I came very close to just smacking the her several times. 

- The not-like-other-girls girl made another appearance recently. She was wearing a cape. Our IT guy was working on the computer behind the desk that day, and when he saw that, he looked at her, then looked at me like the most confused puppy. Honestly, I don’t even care that she was wearing the cape, because capes are the height of fashion and function and we should bring those bitches back. What bothered me is that it was clearly a cheap polyester thing you get in dollar store Halloween costumes. If you’re gonna be a weird in public, at least shill out for velvet. 

- Speaking of our IT guy, there was a day when our entire computer network went down for the majority of the day. It worked for about fifteen minutes after we opened, then just...stopped. We had to write up check outs by hand, we couldn’t pull reserves, and we couldn’t use the OPAC. None of the patron computers were working either. Our poor IT guy was there from 10:15 to three in the afternoon, trying to fix it, and he STILL couldn’t get them all running. It was absolute mayhem. 

- Ever since we added an Adult Fiction Graphic Novel section, we’ve had more and more people complaining about them. Mostly its parents who don’t actually, like, pay attention to what their children check out and assume comic book = equal child friendly (like the woman who let her ten year old check out Lock and Key and was horrified to realize it contains huge amounts of gore, violence, and sexual content, despite that big AF sticker on the side). An equally big section are the Christian warriors who see the horror and crime comics and are absolutely scandalized on children’s behalf, because what if a child SEES that! Despite the fact they’re in their own section, a section which is nowhere near the kid’s area. One woman found one on the new books shelf objectionable, so she covered it with other stuff. As soon as she left, I went out and rearranged it do it was the only cover you could see. Because I’m a petty bitch.

- The museum saga continues! If you’ll recall from a few posts ago, the museum is a consistent pain in our collective ass for well over a year and a half, taking over half our genealogy room to prove to the city they could run the operation without help and get money to refurbish a historical house.  Well...no one has been in the museum at all since about November of last year. It was supposed to be open every Saturday from 10 to 2, and we haven’t seen hide nor hair of anyone who runs the damn thing. We normally wouldn’t care about it...but people who have temporarily donated stuff to them are starting to show up to reclaim it, and can’t get it out, because the museum staff has the key to the display cases. And we can’t get ahold of any of them. Every time we think we’ve found the right person to talk to about letting people have their stuff back, they say “Oh, no, so-and-so took over that, I have no idea about any of it.” So, they’ve got tons of stuff that does no belong to them, tucked away in locked cases that no one can get into, and everyone is big mad about it. This is pretty much exactly what we expected to happen.

- One of my former coworkers just...stopped showing up to work. She didn’t come in for a shift, and everyone tried contacting her, but she wouldn’t pick up. We tried to check her Facebook (because a few of us were friends with her), but she’d blocked all of us. We didn’t know what happened to her for weeks. Then, one day, another of my coworkers came in and said they’d been to the doctor to get some blood work done, and the former coworker was in the opposite room, drawing a different person’s blood. She pretended like she didn’t know her. None of us ever saw her again after that. She didn’t even return her polos. 

[unknown-terrain]

cerseixjaime shippers are so mad nikolaj and gwendoline are friends lol. look at what this crazy bitch said "remember when nik & gwen had their last scene together, cuddled for hours afterwards, crying in each others arms, saying "i love you" to each other, then did take selfies afterwards saying lovingly goodbye to each other on instagram? oh no wait that were nik and lena."

Yeah I know anon Lol, this same person has also said Nik was cheating on his wife Nukaka with Lena so I didn’t pay attention to this nonsense when I realized it was the same loon from Crazytown. But yes for some reason Twincest shippers feel so threatened by Nik and Gwen’s friendship they feel the need to pit Lena and Gwen against each other even though they’re all friends who care deeply for one another. J/C shippers were also sending anons to J/B blogs for a time after S8 feigning concern over Gwen and Nik’s friendship being fake. They’re so transparent they’re not even good at fooling people.

Using Nik and Lena’s emotional reactions during the filming of their character’s death scene and posting goodbye messages to each other to invalidate Gwen and Nik’s friendship is beyond pathetic and reeks of desperation from creepy Lena/Nik shippers. Bff’s Maisie and Sophie didn’t post goodbye messages to each other, guess that means like Nik and Gwen their friendship was fake all this time. Emilia Clarke posted a goodbye message to Iain Glen but not to her known GoT besties Kit, Nathalie, and Jacob so according to J/C shipper logic that must mean they had a fraudulent friendship too! Anyway it was pretty obvious to me that goodbye messages weren’t needed between those people because they’re in constant contact outside the show and there’s proof of them spending time together outside GoT just like Nik and Gwen.

As for Nik and Lena, they’ve been friends and coworkers for 10 years so of course filming their character’s demise, characters that they’ve been playing for so long was going to be emotional. D&D gave J/C more scenes compared to the books so they also worked together more.

Now back to Nik and Gwen and their fake friendship. Lmao. Yes they hate each other so much which is why most of the time at award shows and afterparties they’re together. He also asked her to be his co-star in a play he wrote which they performed in LA, not to mention all those times they confirmed calling each other staying in contact all these years like for example when Nik called Gwen during an interview, and being the first to call each other after reading the S8 scripts, being the first to call her congratulating her on her emmy nom etc and etc. AND all those sightings of them just hanging out together during their downtime in different parts of the world. Like earlier this year they were spotted attending Cate Blanchett and Stephen Dillane’s (aka Stannis) play together in London. Gwen has also said her and Nik love each other and I think we already knew that obviously. But if you want actual receipts for everything I mentioned here I would be happy to provide them because unlike certain people I don’t make claims without proof.

So before the J/Crazies start accusing Nik and Gwen of being fake friends they first need to take a step back with their rpf shipping and ask themselves have my faves been seen together outside Game of Thrones/HBO promo/Conventions? We know Nik and Gwen have LOL. Jelly? Oops. Next time you see Twincest shippers trying to spread false rumors about Gwen/Nik  remind them of that or send them on over to my post for a dose of reality. This came out longer than expected but NIK AND GWEN’S PRECIOUS FRIENDSHIP MUST BE DEFENDED AT ALL COST.

Here’s a bonus pic of Nik and Gwen pretending to like each other at a party in LA. 😉 Have a nice day.

[ecto-american]

History

DannyMay 2019 themed story, I’m not late I’m just going my own pace pls be nice to me

Ectoplasm | Broken | Glass | Theory | Community | Eavesdropping | Worldbuilding | Accident | Or Read on AO3. | Shoutout to bibliophilea for betareading

Day 12: History

The truth was more painful than any injury. Agent G himself had already seen his fair share of injuries. While fairly new to the Guys in White, he already had suffered burns from ecto-blasts and a sprained ankle. It wasn't an easy job, but it was the nature of it.

But reading all these records...He couldn't help but let out of low whistle of awe. Another warrant had given them the ability to seize the medical records on Danny Phantom from an annoyed Ohmer. Warrants, forms and documentation. So much pointless paperwork.

They had only been reading through these for a few moments, but Agent G was already wincing at the details of the injuries and the self-reported incident.

"Damn, he got fucked up," Agent G said aloud. Agent K shot him a Look.

"Don't say it like that, it's unprofessional," Agent K scolded him. His coworker continued flipping through the files.

"Dude got skinned!" Agent G exclaimed. "How else am I supposed to describe it?"

"Just say it like it is," Agent K told him. "According to this report, Phantom claimed that he was captured and that another ghost attempted to skin him. How hard is it to say that?"

"But it's fucked up," Agent G blurted out. Another disapproving look from his coworker. "It is!"

"Not saying it isn't, but you need to be more professional than that," he replied.

"Kinda like how you blindly shot rockets at me a few years ago?" Agent G questioned.

"Shut up, rookie."

Agent G rolled his eyes, and he stared at the documents before him. He hated how right his coworker was. The Guys in White really felt like it was seventy percent paperwork, twenty-five percent waiting and five percent something exciting. Though he was so fast and good with doing the paperwork, he was already on the same episode of Game of Thrones as Agent K. This was so boring.

He really had expected there to be a lot more action.

"Officer Snowden will be here tomorrow, right?" Agent G asked hopefully. Agent K nodded.

"Yeah, she'll come with us tomorrow to question Phantom," he replied. "She's trained to work with youth."

"Cool, cool," Agent G said with a soft sigh. He drummed his fingers boredly on the table. "So what can I pack for tomorrow?" Please let it be ecto-guns and smoke bombs.

"Uh, here." Agent K handed the rookie a piece of paper. "Make copies of this. It's going to be the key to victory."

"What is it?" Agent G asked curiously, scanning the page.

"Forms we can fill out to get the IRS to audit taxes. You have no idea how far just threatening this form goes in terms of getting information."

"Really? No bad cop good cop?" Agent G stared in disappointment at the paper before glancing to his coworker.

"We're good cops; the IRS is bad cop," he explained. Agent K put down the files he was reading. "Look, rookie. I know you were expecting more, but this is kinda most of the job. Learn to enjoy it. It's a sweet gig."

"How do you mean?" Agent G blurted out. "Aren't you bored?" Agent K shrugged.

"Yeah, it's a little boring, but because everybody wants to join the Men in Black, and basically only Amity Park believes in ghosts and has ghost activity, there's basically no requirements to join, good insurance and decent pay. I haven't actually had to do any real work until Danny Phantom showed up. And I did the same deal as you, graduated high school, police academy then here. So it's been almost twenty years of maybe three years worth of work? At most." Agent K began to collect the files to put in a white briefcase.

"That's so...unproductive," Agent G said. He passed the files he was reading over. Agent K shuffled them and put them into the briefcase as Agent G stood with the IRS form to head to the copy room.

"Welcome to working for the government and seeing your tax dollars at work up close and personal. Now make the copies and bring me them and the warrants so we can go home and prepare for tomorrow."

123456789

Phantom, no-Danny's eyes kept glued to them as they came back into his room. Jazz shot them a warm smile despite her fingers nervously playing with loose threads of Phant-Danny's sheets. Neither could bring themselves to return any kind of smile, instead just watching them with such an overwhelming mix of emotions, it was hard to tell what was most present. Fear for their son, the ghost, and his safety. Betrayal that they had to find out this way, when he was so hurt he needed a hospital visit. Relief that they finally had Phantom in their, that they finally knew exactly where their son was after hours of mystery. A strange indescribable feeling as the years of puzzle pieces began to click together in the wake of what was going on.

Maddie couldn't bring herself to look at him as she shuffled to her seat, but Jack stared back at him. His eyes were wide and watching. He fidgeted with the marker in trembling fingers. The gho-his son was afraid.

Jack settled into one of the chairs meant for visitors, next to Maddie near the foot of the hospital bed. His fingers drummed on his knee anxiously as he glanced between his kids. Jazz had taken her seat to sit right next to Phant-next to Danny. Danny, with bright white hair and glowing eyes. White hair that used to be such an identifiable marker for their ghostly enemy. How did Danny change-that light. It had to be.

His hands felt sweaty, remembering how much Phantom was struggling to breath and how much pain he was in, the garbled ectoplasm and the amount of effort he had seemingly did to prevent that light from coming. Because of that look in his eyes as he and Jack stared at each other. The gho-his son didn't want him to see what would happen.

"How are you doing, Danny?" he questioned.

Danny kept his eyes on them, despite uncapping the marker and beginning to write. He only broke eye contact to glance to see where Maddie was and to check his writing as he scribbled very quickly on the whiteboard. Danny was afraid of them.

OK.

Jack simply nodded. He looked over at Maddie. She had begun staring blankly at Danny, and he leaned over to nudge her.

"What's his condition?" he asked. Maddie straightened in her seat.

"Seven fractures, seven missing teeth, five more badly damaged and tongue's almost gone. Plus the skinning, and a few other small cuts. They've already given him a few stitches, and there were." Maddie glanced to her son as he continued to watch them. Jazz mirrored his actions, both silent as they listened in. "Several other injuries. Old ones. They did what they could for some of them. Such as this really bad burn on his back."

A really bad burn on his back. From the Fenton Bazooka Jack had aimed at Phant-that Jack had shot at his own son as he had tried to desperately fly away from him. Only earlier that day. A shot he had taken so much pride in, a shot that had finally landed against a difficult target. He shot his own son. And this wasn't even the first time. They had such bad history as FentonWorks and Phantom.

"I'm going to be doing surgery with them, since they're going to need," Maddie trailed off. She didn't want to say it. Her ghost expertise was needed under the knife.

"I'll do it if you can't," Jack offered immediately. He glanced at his son. He looked pale with worry, and Jack had to look away. Never in his life did he expect that he'd be reluctant to take a chance to study a ghost under the knife.

"No, I can do it," Maddie insisted, but she didn't sound convinced. To have to operate on your own child…

Jack heard a marker squeaking, and he turned to watch the bedridden teen scribbling something down on the whiteboard. He soon held it up to them.

Are you mad? I'm sorry.

"Of course not!" Maddie sprung to her feet to rush to him. Jack followed her. She immediately put her hands gently on his cheeks, kissing his forehead lovingly. "Danny, I'm so, so sorry." Her voice cracked painfully. Danny exhaled softly, and he visibly relaxed. Even Jazz seemed a little more relieved. "Oh, my baby must be in so much pain."

"I've been worried about you all day," Jack added, and he moved to lean in as close as he could to Danny, wiggling an arm behind his back to gently hug him. He felt Danny grab his arm and squeeze instead of a hug.

Maddie straightened, and she let go of Danny's face in favor of taking his hand to squeeze tightly. Jack held on a bit more before finally letting go, but he kept a hand on Danny's shoulder. Danny's hand wiped at his eyes before he accepted a tissue from the box Jazz offered.

"We're in a bad situation," Maddie spoke bluntly. Jazz raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"The Guys in White are already here," she explained. "And they have a warrant. When Danny gets discharged, they want to take him in." Danny paled, and he sunk down in the bed. He pulled his hand away from his mom to write. Jazz glanced worriedly at Danny. "And the hospital was able to prevent them from taking him for now. Something about a legal loophole. We need to figure out a way to make sure Danny gets released to us."

"Danny, no," Jazz said sharply. Jack peered to see what Danny had written.

I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have come here. They're going to arrest me.

"Jazz is right," Maddie agreed. "We couldn't have helped you. Your jaw is bad. We would have had to take you here anyway."

"That doesn't matter now," Jack said. "What matters is that you're going to be fine. And we'll figure this out."

"We should talk to the lawyer," Jazz spoke up. "Maybe she can tell us more. Or tell us who to talk to?"

"Danny has surgery in an hour," Maddie mused, glancing at the clock. It was nearly nine at night. "And I don't know if that lawyer is still even here. It's so late."

"Jazzypants and I will go check, or leave her a message, just see what we can do," Jack promised her. "We'll get through this."

Maddie just nodded. Jack motioned for Jazz to come with him. She nodded, and she gave Danny a final smile before getting up to follow their dad.

123456789

Jack was surprised to see the light still on in the office of Elizabeth Ohmer. The lawyer was here way past any normal hour he'd expect a lawyer to be open. But he was glad she stuck around, and he stopped outside of the door, sighing heavily.

"You okay?" Jazz's voice snapped him out of a stupor. Jack shook his head no.

"I can't believe Danny didn't tell us," he said quietly. "And he only told us because…" Well, he didn't even really tell him. He found out. Everything just clicked too well, and he hated it. He hated that this was even a situation. How could Danny hide this from him?

"Worry about that later," Jazz urged him, and she raised her knuckles to the door. She paused, letting her hand hover. "It's just really complicated," she tried to explain. Jack's stomach felt empty, and he didn't want to hear what he knew she was going to say. He quickly raised his own hand, lightly knocking and cutting her off.

"Come in!" a voice called out. Jack opened the door, revealing the lawyer at her desk. She looked tired, hair pulled back and looking a bit frazzled. He couldn't help but notice that she had taken her heels off and was letting them sit next to her desk, along with her suit jacket hung carelessly on a coat rack. "Oh, hello! How can I help you?"

"Hello, I wanted to ask about Phantom?" Jack questioned. Ohmer motioned for him and Jazz to claim seats in front of her desk as a yawn slipped out.

"What can I help you with?" she inquired. Ohmer stretched a bit, her back cracking as she sat straight, letting her hands rest on her desk.

"My wife told me that the Guys in White want to take Phantom when he's discharged," Jack explained. Jack leaned forward onto the desk. "It's very important to us that Phantom doesn't go with the Guys in White."

"I'm glad you agree," Ohmer nodded. She sighed, leaning back in her chair once more. "They came by with a warrant not too long ago. We had to surrender the new medical record we made for him. And I know they'll be back, and they'll have more warrants and documents. I'll have no choice but to let him be discharged to them. I've been trying to find something, but…" Ohmer trailed off.

"But?" Jazz pressed curiously.

"I'm not an expert in this kind of law," Ohmer explained. "I'm a lawyer for a hospital, I don't know the criminal law or anything that well. I tried to get in contact with some people who may help, but it's." She looked at her watch with a frustrated sigh. "Almost nine-thirty on a Friday night. Nobody's going to be in their office or likely even call back until Monday. So we're kind of on our own."

"We want to help," Jazz replied.

"Yes," Jack jumped in. "Please. Where should we start?"

Ohmer stared between the two of them for a moment, looking thoughtfully at them.

"I think the best and first action is to locate Phantom's family," Ohmer said slowly. The lawyer slightly swayed back and forth in her chair as she thought. Jack and Jazz exchanged a nervous glance with each other. "If we can find out who he was, his history, it'd really help us in that he'll have adults who can represent him. His parents, or maybe an aunt or grandparent. Older cousin. Somebody."

"And what if we can't?" Jazz wondered. She leaned onto the desk. Jack knew she had the exact same worries as him. This newly discovered secret being exposed when it would eventually be uncovered that the closest thing to an alive identity Phantom had was Fenton. "It'd be...it'd be really hard to track such a thing down. Wouldn't it?"

"It would be," Ohmer admitted with a sigh. "We could eventually. But we just simply don't have that kind of time. We may just have to see if we can assign him a legal guardian, through some kind of loophole maybe? He's likely classified as a runaway of sorts by now, emancipated given that he's living independently of his parents. Or he could be placed into a foster family for now."

"What about me?" Jack wondered. Ohmer cocked her head curiously at him. "Mads and I would do it. We'll be his legal guardians." That felt so odd to say.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Ohmer mused thoughtfully.

"Why not? It'd help us get Phantom home where he can recover safely," Jack pointed out. Ohmer had a skeptical look as she studied him.

"Mr. Fenton, given your long and detailed history with him, I think it's a very terrible idea, and it'd be irresponsible of me to allow him to be discharged into your care. The very public campaign against him, the interview statements about your desires to study him, dissecting him molecule by molecule," Ohmer explained. Jack's stomach dropped as he was forced to remember all the things he had said. "You're a ghost hunter. He's a ghost. To be very frank, Mr. Fenton, Dr. Carrington and I both have already agreed that you are not somebody that we trust to handle Phantom's long term care after he's discharged. No more than than we trust the Guys in White with his care. I apologize, but you have to understand. I'm also very certain that the Guys in White would use your interest in taking Phantom into your care as merely a ruse, and that there would be child abuse happening within the home. I have nothing against you, or the work that you do. But right now, Phantom is my patient, and he's also a minor. I'm doing what I believe is best for him."

Jack wringed his hands a bit to try and overcome how numb he felt at the words. He had no arguments or counter-points or...really anything. She was right. She was so many levels of right, and he never felt like a worse father. His own child hadn't been safe in their home for years. Hadn't been safe from him or his mom. Danny didn't even...didn't even tell him. He probably never felt safe enough to confide in them. Even before this, Danny had to have doubts that Jack loved him more than anything. And who could blame him. He was no safer at home than he was...with the Guys in White.

Jack dry swallowed. He could only imagine the amount of daily fear Danny had of him, and he hated that he knew exactly why Danny never told him or Maddie.

"So what then?" Jack wondered. "Phantom's just going to go into foster care? And there's nothing I can do?" Ohmer shrugged. Panic flushed through him. No, no, no. His son had to come home with him.

"He's in our legal hands right now," she explained. She sat up to look through her book, flipping a few pages. The lawyer glanced up at them to give them a reassuring smile. "I'll figure something out."

"How can I help? I can read fast, and I take good notes," Jazz offered. Ohmer didn't glance up from her work, and Jack could tell she was debating internally.

"It'd be difficult to read through everything by yourself," Jack tried to persuade her. Please. Please just let me do anything to make sure Danny comes home.

Ohmer bookmarked her page, but she didn't close it. Instead, scooting her chair to a bookshelf, she began to scan the titles. She plucked a few from the shelves.

"Um, look through here for anything related to orphaned children," she replied. "Or a minor without a legal guardian, emancipated teens, anything that could go along with that." She handed Jazz a book, and she eagerly took it, flipping it open. Ohmer flipped a book to double check the name before giving it to Jack. "And Jack, can you look through this one for anything related to police procedures for a patient who's in custody?"

Jack accepted the book, setting it on the desk. He stared at the title of it, a long law-based title that he couldn't even begin to truly understand. He opened it curiously, flipping through a few pages. Tiny text, many big words. Zero pictures.

"I'm going to get us some coffee," Jack offered as he stood up. His knees felt a bit weak, but he didn't quite buckle. "It's going to be a long night."

[ren-c-leyn]

A Zombie’s Justice

Another short for @thependragonwritersguild ‘s unconventional challenge. This one uses prompts 4834, 4839, 4846, 4855,  4857, 4866, 4875, 4877, 4884, and 4912 .

 It’s another spin on what the life of an immortal might be like. This one is set in a prison, has swearing, talks about executions, has deaths in it, mentions beatings but doesn’t describe them, and has some corruption in it.

  He was the worst criminal we ever held in this prison. And three weeks after his execution, he started running it. We called him the 171st zombie, because he was prisoner #171 and, frankly, wouldn’t fucking die. We hung him, electrocuted him, drowned him, shot him, poisoned him, stabbed him, and even tried smothering him with a damn pillow. The muffled giggles from beneath it still give me nightmares late at night. In the end, his sentence was changed to life in prison.

 He wasn’t the least bit upset about it. In fact, the man was thrilled. Strutted about the place, whistling that gods awful tune. Sometimes he’d start muttering to himself. I remember overhearing a few of his mumblings, but one in particular had sent chills down my spine.

  “Tsk, tsk, why is it that the talentless always run the show?” 

  Other inmates started turning up dead, and it didn’t take a genius to know who it was. Don’t know how he kept getting out of his cell, but he did it. All of the leaders of criminal packs were gone, and he stepped into their shoes. Most of the other guards stepped aside, but the warden and I refused to back down.

 He’d flash me his mad grin from time to time, but never gave me a reason to act. That was his way, pushing to the edge, but never stepping over the line. He was waiting for us to do something. What that something ended up being, I’ll never forget, nor will I ever forgive.

 The warden had me arrested under false charges and put into the prison. I was not given a choice, I was not given an explanation, I was just stripped of everything I had and tossed in like common scum. My time in the prison was, in short, a living hell. The prisoners were more than happy to unleash their fury, beatings and running for my life became the new normal. My fellow guards happy to sneer and push around the fallen one. No one lifted a finger to stop it, no one but the 171st zombie.

 I was running from another rabid pack on my third week when the zombie’s main clique appeared and formed a wall between me and my tormentors. I stopped and stared before thinking better of it and looking forward, only to be faced with that mad grin. He winked at me before making his way to the front of the wall.

 “I think it’s time you rabid dogs go back to the den from where you came before someone takes it upon themselves to put you down.”

 The effect was instant. They were all gone. Just as quickly as they had gotten onto my scent, they had vanished back into the bowls of the prison from where they came. The zombie returned to me, a smile on his face.

 “Tired of close shaves yet?”

 “Why did you do that? What do you want from me?”

 He rose his eyebrow, smile vanishing.

 “Nothing at all.”

 “Don’t play games with me, zombie, we both know you don’t do anything without some sort of gain.”

 “No gain to be made here, you are useless as far as my small ambitions are concerned. After all, misery is a disease. You don’t get rid of it by passing it onto others. The world is a dark and cruel place, if you let it be, and I’m not interested in letting it be cruel much longer.”

 And with that, he started to walk away. I followed him, pissed off beyond belief. How dare he say something so profound after what he’s done. How dare he say that he wasn’t going to let the world be cruel after he had done so much to make it that way. How fucking dare he.

 “So what, are you trying to tell me you’re going to be some fucking hero?”

 “No, I’m just another monster. However, I happen to be a monster with a conscience, unlike your masters.”

 “How can you say that after you’ve burned an entire fucking city to the ground and killed the queen of Juniper?”

 He stopped and faced me, that mad smile pulling at his lips.

 “The thought really hasn’t crossed your mind, has it?”

 “What thought?”

 “That you’ve been deceived.”

 “What the fuck are you talking about, zombie?”

 “You what’s better than keeping your own secrets? Exposing the secrets of others. That’s why they wanted to kill me, you know, because I knew. The trouble is, I can’t die, as you’ve seen firsthand. No one will believe the words of criminals, but they’d believe you,” he said before leaning forward, nose almost touching my own, “so here’s what happened.”

 He wove a complex tale of trusts and betrayals, of one event spiraling into another. He talked about how he had been a spy for this kingdom for longer than he could remember, talked about the current king’s orders, and how the princess had him set up to take the fall for the murder her fiance committed. Then, they burned the city with him still inside, hoping he’d be among the body count.

 “I would have died, of course, but I can’t die,” he told me, before continuing on with his attempt to tell the king and his eventual arrest. 

 Then, at the end of the history, he spoke of his plans for the future. I wasn’t sure if I really believed any of it, or if I thought it was all shit. One thing I did know, however, was if the story was true, there was more at stake than just my head. So, I agreed to join in on his madness.

 “Few men know what to do with fury, but you seem to be one of them,” he said before smiling. “We’ll be out of here and on the castle’s doorstep in less than a month. You’ll see.”

 And I did see. Two weeks after I had successfully infiltrated the zombie’s pack, I watched him rally the prisoners. It should have been the bloodiest riot I had ever seen, every single one of the prisoners taking on the guards at once, but not a single guard was harmed. It seems as though the zombie promised certain death to the men who killed my former coworkers. After seeing what he had put together in so short of a time, I couldn’t say I blamed them for fearing him. I was terrified.

 He led the way up level after level, showing me the secret magics he had worked to get to his victims before. How useless our iron bars were against one who had the ability to warp their shapes on a whim. Through them we ran until we reached the warden’s office. He sat in his seat, a stony expression on his face as he stared at me.

 “What is the meaning of this?”

 The zombie stepped up before I could answer.

 “You are being relieved of your post, effective immediately. You have proven that you’re not part of the problem or the solution. You’re just part of a rotten world gone to hell. Actually, that’s not quite right. You are a part of a problem, just not my primary concern.”

 The warden slapped down his papers on his desk.

 “And what problem might that be?”

 “You’re lack of security measures against magic. I could have rotted in here for the rest of eternity if you had even one magic resistant gate.”

 The warden and I stayed silent as the zombie rattled about proper mage proofing and runes and such. At the end of it, I found his story more credible. Magic was a lost art, one reserved only for those who served the royal families directly. Though, that didn’t mean he was a servant of our allies. I didn’t get much time to dwell on it before the zombie drug me on our way to the castle.

 He was mad, insane, crazed, a complete lunatic. Only someone with no mind left would enter through the front gates, and we did. We just walked right passed the guards and into the castle like we belonged. My mind was screaming every profanity I had ever learned as I counted the parade of knights and soldiers that was steadily growing behind us. We were dead men. Well, I was a dead man, he was always going to be undead.

 I had already said my prayers to whatever Gods took the prayers of fools by the time we entered the throne room. All of the parties he mentioned in his tale were gathered: the King, the Princess, and her fiance the Prince of some kingdom over the seas that I couldn’t recall the name of.

 “Your Majesty,” the zombie said before bowing low.

 “I knew you were not dead, but pray tell why I have been told you were.”

 The zombie told the king the same story he told me. The king looked to me at the end of the tale.

 “And what role do you have in this matter?”

 I told him what little I knew, from the execution orders to my being thrown in prison to figure out how he kept getting out and find a good reason to lock him where the sun would even forget his face.

 “Arrest them,” the King ordered at the end of my story.

 I felt my heart stop and time slow, that is, until I saw the guards and the zombie approaching the princess and her lover.

 “You monster! You ruined everything!” she screeched at the zombie. 

 He flashed her that same mad smile.

 “You only carved out your own piece of this ruined world so you could inflict pain and forget your own, but you forgot something important, your highness. No amount of power will make you happy. You’ll always want more, and it will never love you back.”

[buoyantsaturn]

Liability [Reprise] (2/2)

a/n: happy last day of solangelo week!! it's been a great time yall and now i'd like to apologize for what youre about to read!! youre gonna cry, and not just because solangelo week is over, but because i'm a monster! i hope you enjoy it and dont hate me too bad after its over!!

part one here

read it on ao3

On the first day of Will’s second year in residency, he collapsed in the middle of the emergency room. He was diagnosed with severe exhaustion and dehydration and prescribed bed rest and a lot of fluids.

He woke up in his own private room, groggy and disoriented, with a clearly upset Nico sitting at his bedside.

“How are you feeling?” Nico asked, irritation evident in his voice.

“Tired,” Will croaked.

“I told you so,” Nico said, and Will rolled his head to the side to look at him, though he didn’t respond. “I told you this would happen,” Nico continued, voice rising in volume. “I told you that if you didn’t slow down, then something like this would happen. Do you get it now? Do you get that you’re killing yourself and that it’s time to quit whatever stupid game you’re playing? Just--” Nico sighed and grabbed one of Will’s hands between his, pressing his lips to his knuckles before he whispered, “Just come home with me. Come home, and we can stay in bed for a few days, and after that we can...we can do anything, whatever you want. We can travel all over the world, or we can find some...some volunteer work somewhere to keep us busy. We could get a dog or a cat, or become temporary foster parents, Will, we could have a family.”

“Being a doctor is my dream,” Will told him. “I’m not giving up on my dream.”

“So take a break instead,” Nico argued.

“I’ll take as long as I need to recover,” Will shot back. “As soon as I’m cleared, I’m coming back to work.”

They stared each other down in silence, daring the other to say anything more. Nico felt his chest constricting more and more with every breath, and his eyes began to sting with forming tears. He broke eye contact and stood up abruptly, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his jacket - it was times like this that he most missed his oversized bomber.

“Fine,” he croaked, and he left the room.

He barely made it five feet from the door before he broke down, collapsing and sobbing into his hands.

They were twenty eight when Will spent his last one month in the Underworld. He seemed to finally be taking Nico’s advice to rest and relax and spend time with his boyfriend of over ten years. They would have lazy mornings in bed and take romantic walks through Persephone’s gardens (and Will had long gotten over whatever he’d had about having sex in Hell). They were happy again, happy like they were teenagers again, before Will had eaten that pomegranate seed and doomed his own life.

They were so incredibly happy, except for the times that they weren’t.

Whenever Nico brought up even the possibility that Will stop doing surgery or even take the shortest of breaks, it was like something in Will snapped. They would argue for entire days and end up sleeping in separate rooms. They would scream at each other until one of them would leave the room to avoid saying something they would regret.

One minute they would be talking about the idea of getting married. The next would end with a slamming door and objects thrown at the wall out of anger.

It was near the end of the month that Nico reminded Will that he should take it easy when he returned to work, so that he wouldn’t collapse on the job again. Of course, since it was a sensitive subject, Will’s frustration with his boyfriend spiked once again.

“I’ll be fine,” he said, trying to keep his cool.

“Maybe, but you know how tired you usually are after being here for so long,” Nico argued. “You’re not as healthy as your coworkers, and you might not be able to keep up with them--”

“I’m fine,” Will shouted, rising to his feet and stepping closer to get in Nico’s face. “I’m perfectly healthy. And when we get back home, I’m gonna show you how healthy I am, got it? I’ve got a long life ahead of me. I have a ring for you at home, hidden in my sock drawer, because I know I am going to live long enough to marry you.”

Will’s words were like a knife stabbing into Nico’s back. He knew Will didn’t have much time left. His estimation of mid-thirties was going to fall short; Will would be lucky to see the new year.

Nico folded his arms across his chest and dropped his gaze from Will’s eyes. “I’d say yes,” Nico said softly, but his gaze hardened. “If you lived that long, I’d say yes, but I’m not stupid.” He turned away, walking toward the door, but stopped before he left the room. “I’ll ask Alecto to take you home in a few days. Don’t expect me to be there waiting for you.”

And he walked out.

He couldn’t bare to return to the surface for more than a few hours - the risk of seeing Will was too high. He asked his father for errands to run instead, to keep his mind busy, and when he sensed that it was time, he shadow traveled into their apartment - uncleaned, since Will never had the time or energy to bother with organizing - and dug around in Will’s sock drawer until the found the ring box.

Will didn’t make it back to the apartment that night.

One second, he was at work, running toward the ambulance bay to intercept an incoming trauma. And the next he was kneeling at the foot of Hades’s throne, feeling lighter and stronger and more relaxed than he’d ever remembered feeling.

“You’re an idiot,” Hades called down to him, and Will glanced up to see the god towering over him, probably intending to look more intimidating than usual. “I do not understand what my son sees in a child of Apollo, especially one as stupid as you. However, I love my son, and he has loved you, so I supposed I can tolerate an eternity with you, if that is what Nico chooses. If he welcomes you back, then you may spend your afterlife with him in the Palace.”

“Thank you, Lord Hades,” Will said, bowing his head again. “Um, is he here, somewhere?”

“In his chambers, waiting for you,” Hades answered, and so Will got up and left.

He tried forming his apology in his head as he walked down the long halls to Nico’s room, but there was too much to say and his thoughts kept getting jumbled. What could he even say to get Nico to take him back? Why would Nico want him back, after the things he’d said and done?

He walked up to Nico’s door without a single coherent thought in his head, but he knocked on the door anyway, opening it once he heard a response from within.

Nico was sitting on the bed, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets, gaze locked on the floor, darker-than-usual circles under his eyes.

Will walked forward and dropped to his knees in front of Nico. “I’m so sorry,” Will started, and his composure broke instantly. “You were right, and I’m so sorry I didn’t listen to you. I was so focused on being a good doctor that I neglected you and only thought about myself, and-- Shit, Nico, I’m so sorry.” He choked out a sob, furiously trying to wipe away his own tears before they splashed against the tiled floor. “I’m such an idiot, I should have been there for you, I’ve been acting so stupid for so long. I don’t deserve you, and...and you don’t deserve someone like me, and I know that, but-- I know now how wrong I was for the last...however many years, and I know I don’t deserve another chance, but please, give me a second chance. Or third, or fiftieth, or however many, just one more. I don’t want to spend another second without you, and I want to make up for how shitty I’ve been. I love you, Nico, I love you so much, please forgive me.”

Nico stood up, and Will had to dry his tears to see that Nico was holding out a ring box - the same one that Will had had in his sock drawer. That was Nico’s ring, and he was giving it back. Will felt his heart break all over again.

He reached up with a shaky hand and took the box from Nico. “That’s...a no, then. Huh. I...don’t know if I was expecting that, or not.”

“No, stupid,” Nico said, and Will did expect the anger in his voice. “You’re already on your knees, so I’m telling you to put that ring to good use.”

“You want me to…? You mean, you’re not mad at me?”

“I’m pissed at you,” Nico clarified, “but I’ve always loved you more than I could ever manage to hate you, so are you going to ask, or not?”

Will blinked up at him a few times, then glanced down at the ring box. He cracked it open slowly, presenting the ring, and said, “Nico di Angelo, will you spend an eternity in Hell with me?”

Nico lowered himself to his knees and cupped Will’s face in his hands before pulling him in for the softest, sweetest kiss. “Of course, Sunshine.”

Will let out another sob as fresh tears started to fall and he collapsed forward into Nico’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around his fiance’s waist.

“I missed you so much,” Nico whispered into his ear, allowing a few of his own tears to fall as he stroked Will’s hair. “I love you, you big idiot.”

Will pulled back and leaned his forehead against Nico’s. “I’m gonna make it up to you, for everything. I’m going to spend the rest of eternity making you as happy as I possibly can. I’m gonna give you the greatest wedding the Underworld has seen since Hades and Persephone’s. Anything you want, just say the word.”

Nico smiled, and it felt so much easier than it had in so long. “All I need is you.”

buy me a coffee | more about solangelo week

[maybealex]

questions 1-30! :))

Here’s the asks!-1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?Yes

2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?No

3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?Last time I played Rainbow Six Siege

4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?All the time

5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?Maybe

6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?Nah, not yet at least

7. What exactly are you wearing right now?A ripped Pink Floyd tank top, black boxers, light grey North Face jacket, and I have a beige blanket on my lap.

8. How often do you listen to music?Everyday

9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?Jeans

10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2018?As you can see, I haven’t been answering my asks 5ever. Anyways, yes it did.

11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?SOCIAL SOCIAL SOCIAL

12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?Surprisingly, no

13. What about ‘R’?Nope. Lot’s of people with names with T’s and C’s tho

14. Can you drive a stick shift?In theory, yes. Because I can ride a motorcycle. Never have tried a standard car though. 

15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?Not really, no

16. Are you going out of town soon?Is July soon?

17. When was the last time you cried?This morning from allergies.

18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?Yes

19. If you could change your eye color, would you?Nah, they aight

20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?No

21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.I can’t decide on anything to eat for breakfast.

22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?Yes. Forehead and temple kisses are OP

23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?No lol

24. What are you sitting on right now?My OP gaming throne that is my rocking chair, completely with two fluffy pillows and a fluffy blanket.

25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?My roommate and I say love you every now and then. Also the guys I play Siege and Overwatch with, we all say love you and hate you often. (Usually in poor taste though. Like when you tk or shoot on purpose you gotta say love you hahaha) 

26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?No

27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?Brandon 

28. Do you get a lot of colds?No, but my allergies are a bitch

29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?A coworker friend gave it to me

30. Does anyone hate you?Don’t know, don’t care

[zymtheloreseeker]

A review on Game of Thrones Season 8 Episode 2 (SPOILERS)

You’ve already been warned, don’t step on the mine when you read the sign that says “You’re stepping on it, fare thee well!”

Before I saw this episode, my sister had already told me that people were calling this a “Drink with Me” episode (I really hope someone got the Les Miserables reference). Naturally, she’s not a fan of Game of Thrones but we all know the show is a maelstrom that permeates every institution, your classmates and coworkers will definitely be discussing it.

Getting into the episode, she was right. A lot of the episode is the members of the surviving cast who’ve had this long 8-season history between them reuniting. We’ve already seen some heartfelt reunions within the last episode, of note: Arya hugging her lost half-brother (cousin, but we all know that) Jon Snow (Aegon Targaryen). 

Getting into the breather theme, it’s interesting how the first episode of the season was “the calm before the storm”. I’m pretty sure having just 7 episodes, even with the successive ones being longer than the usual episode, would make one question how 2/7 of the final season would be “the calm before the storm”. But the sequencing of each episode longer than the next surely means the pace will pick up like a snowball (I just imagined the white walkers and the defenders of Winterfell having a snowball fight). And with the white walkers at Winterfell’s gates, we’re done with cute fluff between characters and happy fireplace songs. 

The episode was just the right amount of time to see this ragged bunch of people who refused to die for eight seasons (Beric and Jon are still in the game despite doing so) steel themselves for the tragic bloodbath that looms ahead. Surviving battles, weddings, feasts, wights, white walkers and wildfire explosions, has earned this cast an episode devoted to them. Unlike Oberyn, we won’t get to complain about not having enough of them before a lot of them inevitably bite the freezing dust. It would be heartrending to see even one of them die after having them with us for so long, but alas, Martin and D&D have a bloodied and slashed chopping board for our favorite characters. 

One of my favorite parts was Jaime and Tyrion uniting under friendlier circumstances. Tyrion doesn’t shut up about the frozen specter of death looming over them, but the brothers will face it together anyway. Part of me wishes that they had the remainder of the Lannister men who bent the knee under their command and donning classic Lannister armor. 

Brienne’s Knighting

 Jaime claimed he did it because he could but we all can see the significance of this. Brienne has never faltered in her duty as a knight and her sacred charge to protect both Stark ladies. She has always brought out the best in Jaime Lannister and it is most fitting that she was knighted by a man who redeemed himself thanks to her help. A man who has sullied his sword and armor found redemption in saving Brienne from a bear, keeping her alive despite having an easy way back to Cersei’s arms and gave her a sword to keep a promise when in the past she has broken them.

Brienne is criticized for fighting for Renly, a man whose claim on the throne isn’t as strong as Stannis but you cannot doubt her loyalty. She continued to fight for a man who wasn’t fit to rule the seven kingdoms where Jaime was forced to slay a man he was honor-bound to serve. While we know Brienne wasn’t disillusioned with Renly yet, she still represents the chivalrous knight that Jaime has not seen since the Mad King’s reign and Barristan’s Tenure. A knight who nearly killed the Hound, a man who scoffs at the idea that knights could be chivalrous. Out of anyone who could be knighted, we all know she deserves it the most. What’s even more awesome about the scene is that Jaime that soiled his reputation is still the same Jaime who was the last legacy of the last generation of great Kingsguard. He not only served with the likes of Ser Arthur Dayne and Ser Barristan, but he was also knighted by them. Dayne spoke bitterly of Jaime during his final battle at the Tower of Joy, but I’m sure that knowing everything Jaime did to protect King’s Landing and Jaime’s redemption journey, he and Barristan would be proud in the afterlife. 

My last thought for this review is that I was NOT prepared for Arya and Gendry’s sex scene (though it was definitely seen coming). I just got so used to the idea of Arya being celibate for eight seasons. I was rather unsettled by it, but hey, Robert’s son and Ned’s daughter consummating in the cold winters of Winterfell? At least a (sorta) Baratheon and Stark thing finally succeeded where Lyanna and Robert couldn’t. 

The cliffhangers this season really make the week feel so long, and the separation anxiety for which character falls to the long night just unbearable. 

[mikedesanti]

It’s About Time

“We're low in our hearts We're low in our heads But all in good time ”

--

Everyone starts to think about last year right about now, and how they want to change. Like the other times I’ve written these, I reread last year’s entry and after an overview I’ve decided I don’t want to change. Everything I was just starting to gain momentum on last year morphed into this thing that was 2017 and just has me excited for this year. a lot. The tone of my last entry was positive but didn’t feel like how I feel now; if 2017 was the awakening then I can only imagine what the year holds.

Which brings me to a conundrum of sorts: how is it that I follow through and make 2018 this wild, successful, incredible, bigger, better year? The answer I kind of have is that as opposed to doing things for more for myself, it’s that I expound and continue to do more for others. This one horoscope thing I saw said to make 2018 a year where I say “no” more and “draw clearer boundaries, reevaluate your priorities, and generally slow down.” Who the fuck wants to do that? Not me, they must have the wrong guy. I am certainly the person who when you do something for me I come back to you with something two-fold, I want you to have the experience I would have and then some.

Part of this year was that I got to do just that with some of my best friends who saw me in the beginning as a 19 year old kid from the suburbs saying crazy things and chasing any lead I could find. For instance, I’ve been to Lollapalooza 4yrs in a row (longest festival streak of the festivals I’ve been to) and this year got to take Justin with me who is one of the honest, best people I know. Four days of rocking out and front row seats at a Cubs game among other activities were something special I was able to share with a good buddy. Coolest part was all the activities we got to do for free.

That just happens to be part of the job I’m at, hard work and relationship building has its spoils. I go to a lot of amazing events and more so want to spread what I have access to to others who don’t get to see these things so much. That grind mode mentality I have on the job pays off in folds, and maybe that’s why I like what I do and stay with this brand and company when I see many people leave each year. It’s not for everyone. On a team of 150 people there’s like 15 or less co-workers/ friends who are still there from when I started over 2 years ago. Everyone transitions, it happens, and most times it works out for that person so I wouldn’t be mad at them and most times are proud of what they do.

The transition I made at work paid off big and I helped land some solid partnerships that kept me busy the back half of the year, and set the stakes higher for what we’re already working to make happen in 2018. In an odd way (yes I’m happy I’ve had the time off), I’m ready to get back to work. Roll up to the office, walk through the door with some loud music, put on a pair of new kicks, and get to it, that’s just how I role and how I get things done. It’s a combo of my role, the people I work with (I spend at least 40 hours a week with some of my best friends and then hang out with them outside of work), trust they have in me and the desire for greatness I pursue. It’ll have my name on, and my name is my name, so it can’t suck. I want to tell a story, and moreover I want to go back to believing a story as it’s told. One of my coworkers and friends has told several people that we’ve met with that while I’m long winded, my greatest strength is being a storyteller. What can I say? I could sell Raid to a bug, Imma hustler I can salt to a slug.

Telling stories is what leads me to my main goal for the year, a project I talk about but haven’t done enough with. Although getting older hasn’t meant anything really, this has to come out now because otherwise I’ll be too old and nobody would care. But in turn with getting older, I’ve stripped away the walls I’ve told you about before and was willing to be vulnerable in a variety of ways. That came to life in a lot of my travels, especially my 2 Euro trips alone where at times I knew no one and had to make a way and just let go. It also involved letting my guard down and not being afraid to fall for someone. I’ve said before that I compartmentalized the concept of “love” into three versions: 1.) the love you get from your family, 2.) the love you get from your friends and 3.) the love you get from someone you care about. It was nice to understand more of what all three felt like at the same time as opposed to one or two in bunches, and just care about someone. Everything has kind of been this perfect storm that is like right on time, and I just feel too strong to not let this out and make it everything it can be. The one thing I’m hung up on a little is if I can get away with dancing or not haha. I don’t wanna be corny but everyone that knows me knows that this is something I’m too passionate about not to mold into this in some way (fun side note: a client who isn’t a direct media client, and works in brand creative, told me that I dance with character and that’s a high compliment coming from her).

In terms of timing, 2018 has a special moment for our family that we’ve been looking forward to for a very long time when my sister will become Dr. Rebecca DeSanti. This is a dream of hers (and therefore of course ours) that she’s been chasing for 13/14 years to help change the lives and stories of others as she’ll become a reconstructive plastic surgeon. There have been so many sagas to her story to get to this point and I can’t be more proud of her resilience, her will to keep going, and just how badly she wants to help others. We’ve all been there for her and this is the crowning achievement really for this year. I don’t care however big I make something, this is far more important to me. Kiddo, know that I beyond excited to come to Albany in March and celebrate where you’ll do your plastic surgery residency, and then again in May when you become a doctor :)

So to end this version, and I’ve been saying this already here and there, but with everything that 2017 brought, I can’t help but want to go for the throne and want the crown. It’s not like this is some make or break type thing, but after this year there’s no “maintain” or even “step back”, the only way is up. Whatever it takes, wherever it goes, however it happens, I’ve just got this feeling that it’s going to happen. Hello 2018, it’s a pleasure to meet you.

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“We'll take charge We'll all take our chances All in good times”

[suckitsurveys]

Is your best friend in love with someone? Sarah and Lydia are. Randal, not so much. And Mark is in love with me. :)

Does the feeling of Christmas time make you happy? Very much so. There’s just something about it.

Do you like sensitive guys? I like people who aren’t afraid to show emotion.

Do you wear more t-shirts or dressy shirts? A good mix of both.

What would it take for you to be completely miserable right now? My sister decides not to let me be in my niece’s life anymore.

Do you believe that there’s a difference between love and lust, or is a feeling just a feeling? There’s most certainly a difference.

When you see a girl with big boobs, do you automatically think she’s a slut? How on earth would that make her a slut?

Would you rather be unique or beautiful? Well, I’m already both, so.

At this moment in time, do you wish you could trade places with someone else? I’d like to trade places with someone on a beach. Do horror movies these days scare you? No. Are you excited for college and being on your own? I didn’t go away for college, but I did move away from home recently.

How many times have you sworn at your parents? I don’t keep count. I’ve only ever done it when I was really pissed.

Do you think it’s bad to have sex at 15 or younger? If you are protected and safe, then why not?

Have you left some things unsaid with a certain person? Yes, but I am really hoping to rectify that.

Exciting day out or chill day in? Chill day either way.

If a guy wants to become friends with an ex, does it mean he still likes her or cares for her? Whatever.

Do you get bad cramps? Not very bad, no.

Do you like cover songs better than the originals? Some, yes.

What would you do if your youngest brother died right now? I don’t have a brother, so.

Do you believe that “evil” or “sick” people will get what they deserve eventually? Sure.

Do good things happen to good people? I mean, yeah?

What’s something you just don’t give a fuck about? Taylor Swift, Game of Thrones, Thanksgiving. 

Favorite love song at the moment? I don’t have a particular favorite.

Would you rather it be summer or winter all year round? That would get boring, but summer please.

Best place to meet guys? How would I know?

What is the best thing that’s happened in the past week? I got free Starbucks twice. 

The worst? My doctor appointment yesterday. They started to do a pap but then I got my period so they had to stop. Then I got a flu shot in one arm and they took my blood in two different places in the other arm and I’m in so much pain today. 

If your boyfriend could get you anything in the world, what would you want? A kitten.

You just smoked a blunt, what are you doing? Sleeping.

Have you had more than 25 sex partners? Nope.

Who is your last text from? My sister.

Last person you talked to on the phone? Mark.

What was your last thought before you went to bed last night? I don’t remember.

Are you satisfied with what you currently have in life? Yes and no.

Have you ever laughed at something that wasn’t meant to be funny? Yes.

Would you consider yourself to be spoiled? So many surveys have asked this lately.

Would your parents be mad if you came home drunk? No.

Do you think your past mistakes made you into a better person? Sure.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with V? Nope.

What about a Z? Nope.

Did someone screw you over lately? A little, yes.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months? Try 6 years.

Have you ever found someone you really, really, really liked? Yes.

Were you happy when you woke up today? No. I had a headache.

I bet you miss somebody right now? I do.

Can you honestly say you’re okay right now? No.

What are you planning on doing after this? More surveys.

Next time you will kiss someone? Today when I get home.

Have you told anybody you loved them today? Yes, my husband this morning.

Have you ever tripped someone? I have.

Will tomorrow be better than today? No.

Did you sleep alone last night? Nope.

Is anyone else in the room with you? Yeah, a coworker.

Do you get distracted easily? Yeah.

What are you doing today? Working, going to the gym, having a fire tonight with the neighbors.

What are you listening to? My coworker talking to his son on the phone.

Are you easily amused? Yes.

Name something that you realized today? I don’t know.