#my gender is fucked so why not present fucked yk

[steampunkedparm]

"of course you have carabiner's."

yeah??? how else am i supposed to hold my keys?????

[mitskijamie]

pleaseeee give us more bigender jamie thoughts the concept is too good

Bigender Jamie my beloved….

He uses he/she pronouns <3 she doesn't mind they/them (pronouns are like. not very important to her honestly. she probably couldn’t tell you what a pronoun was if you asked LMAO) but she just doesn't really connect with gender neutrality/androgyny as much as she does with manhood and womanhood as separate and coexisting entities yk

When Jamie's super little, he starts asking Georgie why there are only boys and girls and he can't be both, and instead of jumping to tell him that's just the way it is (because she wants her bub to be a free thinker. obviously), she thinks about it for a while and is like. Well. I don’t know. I suppose you can be both if you’d like? And Jamie is like “ok :) yay :)” and runs with it

Georgie lets Jamie wear/do whatever he wants. She’s a very busy woman and simply has bigger things to worry about than her child wearing a pink shirt or whatever the fuck. As long as she can afford it, she'll buy it for him, because she's just trying to keep him happy and pay the bills yk

So Jamie amasses a small collection of what he calls “girl stuff," like these types of things

which he absolutely loves and has so much fun w. He's never pressured to identify any certain type of way or change anything about himself, always allowed to experiment, and he's very comfortable until he meets his dad

James starts coming around again when Jamie’s like 10ish, and he’s horrified by Georgie’s lax stance on masculinity and makes Jamie break/cut up/throw out her "girl stuff," because he doesn't think it's at all appropriate for his "son"

Having to destroy his favorite clothes and toys while his dad berates her is super traumatic and completely alters his perception of her gender/gender as a whole. When it was just him and Georgie, Jamie sort of took it for granted that he had room to experiment and didn’t realize that most people really don’t think it’s okay, and so it's a big shock and really forces her into the closet for a long time

Then she starts at the academy and everything around her is super masculine all the time, and she really tries put it behind her and convince herself that it was a phase and she doesn't have any need to indulge in that part of herself, since she's comfortable as a man and doesn't exactly feel disconnected from manhood

But as hard as he tries to convince himself otherwise, he always feels like he's missing part of himself. He's content with the life he's living and absolutely loves being one of the lads, but there's just something missing and it's undeniable and uncomfortable and always bubbling below the surface

So she's stuck in that limbo until she starts dating Keeley. He shows her an old picture where he’s wearing a Cinderella costume at daycare or something and tells her how he used to want to be “a girl and a boy at the same time” + about the “girl stuff” and how James made him destroy it, and he recounts the whole thing like it’s a funny story (because that’s just how he processes things) and is expecting Keeley to laugh with him, but she just gives him this really sad look and tells him she's sorry that happened to him and she hopes he feels comfortable expressing himself authentically with her

Which he doesn't at first, but he acclimates, because Keeley is willing to meet him halfway and work it out with him <3 She does his makeup on occasion and they experiment with phrases like "good girl" and "girlfriend" and even subtle public expressions of femininity like jewelry and nail polish and "women's" soap/shampoo, which Jamie really loves mixing with his generally masculine presentation

At one point Keeley asks her if she thinks she's a trans woman, and she's like. ":/ I don't think so, like I don't want to be a woman all the time, I just wish I could be a lady without having to give up being a lad 😔”

And Keeley of course is like "oh like bigender?"

She says it like it's nothing, but it's the first time Jamie's ever heard that and he had no idea that that was a real option and genuinely feels like he's found something he's been looking for his entire life and literally almost cries

(You can't spell "lady" without "lad" <3)

So Jamie starts to get Girl Stuff again (including some early-aughts nostalgia items identical to the things that James made her get rid of, which is very healing) and present the way she wants to present and has never ever been happier and finally feels whole

I have a LOT of thoughts about Jamie's gender identity and his relationship with Roy and the internal conflict/shame that would arise from that, but this post is already soooo long so you guys will have to let me know if you want me to talk about all that in another post

She's mostly pretty comfortable with her body, so she forgoes gender affirming surgeries, but she does start estrogen in her mid-late 20's, which is a game changer because it makes it easier to present feminine when she wants to while also allowing her to present masculine when she wants to

He doesn't really ever come out to the team, because that's not his style. They can figure it out on their own. (If you assume she's cis that's on you etc.) And they do!!! Dani starts calling her "amiga" on tuesdays thursdays and saturdays and "amigo" on mondays wednesdays and fridays or something like that lmaooo

He does come out to Georgie and Simon tho <3 Georgie is not surprised at all and takes to adding "baby girl" and "my daughter" to her repertoire very quickly, and at the end of the day she's the person whose opinion matters most to Jamie, so it's just a huge weight off his shoulders

(Simon makes her a bi flag cake and is like "love is love <3" and Jamie is like. Hm. Well. Thank you. You're a little lost but thank you)

[dirtbra1n]

hi still missing him. your fav being a background character disease is hitting me hard,,,

anyways so tashiro is like a cup of water to me. this is mostly because of his easy goingness with almost anything and his endless acceptence, like you can pour him in different cups and he will just fill it,,, also gender reasons, water and gender symbolism,, augh

idk im not very strongs with words but like, he was like nice :) when he learned about miyano and sasaki and when he learned about gl his first thought was 'wow,, girls loving girls thats just like what my friend likes but his is boys' and he was very alright with crosdressing too bcs why wouldn't he??

the one time he wasnt ok with smh was being the captain and like wow thats snow

and yk i think water fits his personality kinda too, water is slippery and is all over to place, hard to contain if you don't have smh solid like a cup and one of the most important things for everyone (like him omg he brings sm positivity to everywhere he goes)

this is such a word vomit sorry,, i have visions but then again im an artist not a writer and the words are failing me to portray the visions </3 miss my boy

WATER SYMBOLI[GETS SHOT] oohhhhhh you’ve got me good with this. pour him in different cups and he’ll just fill them……. WOW. THATS SNOW……… ohhhhhhh fucked up really fucked up I’m Writing That Down Right Now. all over the place and hard to contain Missing Tashiro Anon would you believe me if I told you this is something I’m working with already…….

I love word vomit I love trying to picture visions presented to me with words I will do my best to work with the visions I’ve got in your place……… thank you for your service

[cvntboyneedsfixed]

this is actually a rant bc tumblr is now reccomending me stuff from the landfill of the internet & i read it bc im a dumb bitch but like

terf rhetoric is literally so funny esp when they collab w/ cis gay edgelords on the internet making shit up about the scary trans mascs (including binary trans men) trying to rape gay men by deviously tricking them into having sex with a ✨ straight woman ✨

but reality (when you like, actually interact with people in real life & are part of yk, irl communities) looks more like:

straight trans mascs existing

t4t trans mascs fucking other trans mascs being the vast majority (counting myself among their number)

not to mention the absolute adoration every trans masc i know irl has for trans women & trans femmes

trans mascs being extremely cautious with cis gay men for obvious reasons

trans mascs on grindr very clearly declaring this on their account & still getting bombarded by chasers, bi men, & yes gay men too lol

tons of bi and pansexual trans people?? these ppl wanna call me a straight woman but then explain how i'm buried in both cock and pussy of all genders?? explain!!

my cis gay friends reading the nasty smut i write to help me nail all the dick on dick details i need (fun fact if you gotta improvise lube shampoo will make all your dick skin peel off <3 my bud apparently learned this the hard way lmao)

meeting my singular gay coworker for the first time and hitting up one of the local gay kink bars & comparing grindr profiles lol he is lovely

listen phallo is amazing and sexy but like not very common for obvious reasons (major surgery and healthcare is a fucking farce and etc etc)... how exactly are these mythical cis gays getting raped by deception?? did they come in eyes squeezed shut and fuck some trans mascs ass then afterwards get jumpscared by pussy?? or did they have to talk to someone they weren't attracted to for a minute or something lol...

Yes, all the men messaging me on grindr are definitely straight or pretending to be bi that's why they keep sending me videos of them sucking cock lol that tracks (like yeah I get chasers but I'm not fucking stupid it's easy to tell them apart)

"trans men are delusional thinking gay men will be attracted to them" actually we've all seen countless examples of the disgusting ways cis gay men treat women's bodies so we are very aware that that reaction is both probably & that the possibility of cis male violence is present like bruh

Also personal pet peeve is when they go on defending how gay men act disgusted by pussy & other afab body parts like yeah. You don't have to be attracted to it oooobviously, but having VISCERAL DISGUST AND HATRED towards the bodies of half the planet's population is actually not part of your sexual orientation it's still mysogyny <3

& it's ridiculous to lean into that ANYWAY because the huge majority of cis gay men i've met have been wonderful & many have been my closest friends in different periods of my life like pleaaaaase stop making them look bad it's slander at this point

anyway trans men i love you trans women i love you & we all deserve to find supportive community & love bc most people out there aren't fringe edgelords who can only generate dopamine by being cruel on the internet

[anachronistic-falsehood]

2 11 17 for the ask game? :3?

2. Anything that you'd like to write but feel like you're unable to?

FUCKING POETRY. HONESTLY. i want to be able to write poetry but i fucking. agh!!!!!!!!! i have written bad poetry before but it's not like. the kind shit that i WANT to write!! i just wanna be good at poetry but im fucking bad at descriptions and imagery so AAGHHHH!!!!!!!!! ITS HARD >:(

11. Three tropes that are fine but overrated.

ENEMIES TO LOVERS. im sorry!!! if u give me enemies and have them flirt and tease each other while in battle or whatever my first thought is not going to be "they should fall in love and be happy and wholesome <3" my first thought is going to be "they should hate fuck" THEY SHOULD BE KISMESISES!!!! if u replace the fun derogatory flirting with "omg ily 🥰" "ily2 <3" u have removed the Flavour....... the Spice....... u can do enemies to lovers well but sometimes it's just like. :/. yk. also idk if this is a trope or a genre of fanfic but NOT A FAN OF OMEGAVERSE!!!! congrats we just reinvented the gender binary!!! except instead of a small petite submissive woman ur just using he/him pronouns for the person being small and submissive!! how fucking revolutionary!!!! jesus!!!! not many other tropes i actively pay attention 2 tbh. those r the only two that i'm kinda meh on!!

17. Past or present tense? Why?

PRESENT TENSE I LOVE U!!!!! i love u present tense <3 i used to be a past tense lover but then i think. i read homestuck and was like ok imma try writing like that actually. and now EVERYTHING is in present tense for me. sometimes second person pov too. i love u second person pov <3 it's just a lot more fun 2 write in present tense i think. idk why!!! it just is!!

[fictionkinfessions]

Anonymous asked:

Hey… uh… Sal here (Sally Face), I'm bored, so I want to do the ask game thing… Not sure if I set this up right, so uh.. sorry if it isn't formatted correctly…

1 Canon Fanon "Fanon fails and triumphs: what is something that is so common in fanon depictions of you and not present in canon that is either horribly inaccurate or scarily accurate" Fails:

Making my PROSTHETIC a mask…

[Yes, I do wear a mask over top of the prosthetic usually… but my actual prosthetic is NOT a mask… I understand that for cosplay you might need a mask… but my prosthetic isn't a mask…]

People making my scars "burns"

[I was shot. By. A. Goddamn. SHOTGUN That's not "burn" scars… HALF MY FACE WAS BASICALLY BLOWN OFF!]

People who draw me with both eyes fully intact.

[Like… if you're drawing me with my glass eye in, then thanks! you're actually representing me well… me me… yk right. my left eye was damaged beyond repair from the shot, and I used a glass eye. I had a lot of fun colors, actually… it was fun once I got used to it. Kind of like braces… it was an extra form of self expression.]

Anyone who ships me with Larry…

[Like… I get it, shipping is gonna get… interesting… but Larry's my stepbrother and also our types do not intersect. I used to talk to him about romance shit, but that's because he listened… I'm not fucking or kissing him– that'd be really weird…]

Treating me like two different 'versions' of myself

[I've seen a lot of 'Sal' vs 'Sally Face' content… and like… there isn't a difference? I'm still Sal… those 'differences' are my mood swings… and just my neurodivergence in general. Yeah, I'm all over the place, but it's not two separate people or identities. At least not for me.]

Triumphs:

Anyone who HCs me as trans

[I'm AFAB Intersex, but I identify as a guy, or… well, a demiboy. but I am technically trans. cause I don't identify with the AFAB assignment. Also, yes, trans me isn't cannon source material, but what IS cannon source material is me being chill with dressing femme; which I also am, on occasion!]

Any stimming content

[I stim and to an extent, tic a LOT, both vocal and motor. mostly hand flapping, foot tapping, spinning and snapping. vocally I don't know why but I say 'whheeee!' like a little kid, I click my tongue and I used to whistle but apparently we don't know how to do that now– :/ So anyone who SHOWS that is incredibly right and it makes me feel seen.]

Anyone who actually keeps me skinny [or just SLIGHTLY chubby] and not buff as hell in their fanart

[I was NOT super athletic… like, yeah, I had muscle.. but I wasn't buff. And I didn't eat all that much, or that consistently plus I had a fast metabolism… so I was skinny. Like… yeah I'm better now about not being THAT skinny, but I was still skinny… I'm not a body builder…]

2 Canon Pets "did you have any pets (canon or otherwise) in source? canon creatures. Yknow /nf"

Gizmo 💙

[my idiot little goober cat. I miss him a lot, but we have cats here too which is nice. I just wish they were as cuddly as he was..]

3 LGBT Canons Tell me about your genders and / or sexualities in your canons! It can be in detail [out of the closet or not, how your life went, who was your fellow lgbts or your bestie allies, etc, etc] or it can be just a lil list! Gender -

Well, I'm a FtM (AFAB) Intersex guy… demiboy to be exact. Aside from dude gender feels, I'm pretty genderless, actually… so I guess I'd describe myself as a mix of masculine and agender or gendervoid?

Sexuality -

I'm not entirely sure tbh… I know I'm on the ace spectrum [I can feel sexual attraction but I'm disgusted/repulsed by the idea of sexual intimacy], I'm nebularomantic. I'm usually only attracted to guys, but anyone can be hot, and I have no idea what my type is. So if I had to put labels I'd say I'm autochorissexual, nebularomantic and omniattracted? [omniattracted isn't a thing- oops… basically omniromantic and omnisexual at the same time like… or… the omni label across all forms of attraction I guess? …okay yeah, omniattracted is a thing to my brain now–]

Uhh.. for other a hotdog magician people I knew, if I'm being honest it was pretty much everyone… we were a bunch of a hotdog magician little freakazoids [in a good way] well… at least that's how my friend group was. To quote Nirvana: "Our little group has always been / And always will until the end"

[be a hotdog magician little weirdos, we will always be a hotdog magician weirdos.]

Sorry for how long this is.. hope y'all are having a good day, and uh.. yeah.

the rules page https://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/rules

Special Text Formatting Please don’t use font colors, tumblr’s optional ‘quote’, ‘chat’, or ‘Lucille’ fonts, tumblr’s Header font style, or excessive bolding or italics, or generated text such as zalgo text or ‘fancy styled fonts’. Confessions in colored font, the above tumblr fonts, or excessive bolding or italics will be posted as unformatted text posts. Some colored text is alright, but full paragraphs will be posted as unformatted text posts. Confessions in generated text will not be posted. [EG Zalgo text] Confessions in typing quirks, such as homestuck typing quirks, are permitted. Please do not make the name(s) and source signatures text extra small, bolded, italicized, or colored. I cannot read small fonts very well.

[hobimo]

sorry if i keep sending you asks i think it would feel a lil weird to dm bc my accounts on sns tend to be kind of throwaway accounts bc i don't know how to build an online presence prob freaks ppl out lol but yeah exactly you can tell that a lot of new jikookers experienced fan fiction for the first time with jikook so they just be reading and writing whatever. no critical thinking just big cocks and alpha knots is what it takes. the thing is that imo years ago you used to like a pairing and then get inspired by them to make up stories/characters, whereas i feel that now jikookers first and foremost see jm and jk's relationship and personalities in That specific way and it translates to fics as well. they keep saying it's just fiction but i don't buy it lmao i think it's the opposite so yeah it kinda fucks the whole thing up yk. OH btw i know that author!!! i have one of their naruto fics saved in my bookmarks so i'm def familiar w them, i'll check it out! ty <3

(i'll censor the names just in case) yeah they're rly good! hmm rk1ve1nk did an interesting spin on omegaverse in Forest,F1re. very animalistic even though the characters were made in a lab, super unique fic. Mo0nJar by them too is pretty cool. changing genres completely, user cartograph1c writes these weird lil fics, def recommended!!

HEELLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i swear i get so excited when i see you in my inbox hello hello hello

yessssss surveycorpsjean has been Around writing bangers. i am just discovering bakudeku the last few months tho so im extra insane about them 👍also recommend watching trigun for normal reasons (please. please please please please we need more people with trigun brainrot. if u like the hanged man archetype and characters doomed by the narratve and tragic siblings you will Love trigun.)

thank you very much for the fic recs!!!!!!! i have heard of the first author but cant think of the fic ive read so i will check it out. im such a fucking sucker for super animalistic a/b/o..... that furry shit is so good

i have so many thoughts about the way people talk and think about jimin these days but im so scared putting them on public posts will get me doxxed or some shit. people are very attached to the idea that jimin acts openly queer which is really like. well. yeah. i definitely think people reallyyyy need to remember it doesnt matter how much you believe someone famous is queer theyre just presenting in a way that makes them happy and you really do NOT need to decide whether that's queer or not lmao in fact i think it says way more about someone when they decide he's queer because he doesnt act like a "typical man". like yeah in his performances obviously he explores gender some times but like sometimes songwriters are also exploring themes and thoughts that are purely creative. sometimes its not about them (and sometimes it is!) but. yeah. you can PERCEIVE him as queer if it makes you happy but you gotta remember thats not fact thats just what YOU think. yknow. and i also think this translates kinda into the fic people consume and create.

like here's the thing. people dont need to ACT a certain way to be considered men like thats ridiculous if youre a man youre a man regardless of how you act or what u say or what bits you have. same for any gender. which is why i generally think critiquing the cringey wattpad fics is a slippery slope. however, do i also think a lot of them have a very distinct cishet girl fantasy..... yes. but its embarrassing to write Y/N fic. so theyve gotta vent their desires somehow which is like fine i dont give a shit what people write. (as much as it bothers me how uncritically people read it and get it popular) but sometimes in a/b/o especially....... its VERY clear when your biases come out. which is why its sooooooooo obvious when someone who has never met real life queer people writes it. for example grouping "women and omegas" like they fill the same role despite being different subgenders when u could specify like. omegas and female betas. if u wanted. implying that women are still women even if theyre alpha but omegas are not men anymore. you get me? the fact that u decided to include male/female gender essentialism in the fic genre specifically around Not doing that is so unbelievably on the nose. and yet i see it everywhere. (i also think this is a symptom of people never having read other fandoms tho. they dont even know about gock [girl cock]).

also fics where the major antagonists are a group of girls that harrass jimin r super mean bc god we cant have a MAN do that or he's a predator. you get me? and the alpha jk who is quiet and broody and doesnt even HAVE to fight bc he's soooooooo strong the other alphas are just scared of his vibes. like you know the type of fic im describing. in general whenever the major antagonist of the fic is a bunch of women who also want to fuck jk (which like. if we're supposed to believe jk is soooo hot... like. they should?) and the author calls them a "gaggle" of women and emphasises how they "giggle" and their high pitched unpleasant voices..... brother we have some serious internalised misogyny to unpack with that one.

sorry this is such a massive rant I HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS. IVE READ SO MUCH BAD FIC IVE NOTICED SO MUCH

[webdollzz]

HIII i actually have a request if u do genderfluid readers 😋😋 if u do could you do something with the reader not being out yet so when they stare at a dude hobie kinda assumes the worse ?? then they gotta explain they wanna BE him not WITH him yk

bonus if reader is constantly presenting very fem so its a bit of a surprise idk thank u 🤞🤞🤞

a/n: hii angel! of course I can do that, I hope this does my genderfluid babes justice <3

warnings: afab!genderfluid!reader x unlabed hobie?? he fws what he fws, anxiety on hobs part, gender envy on yours, albeit bad descriptors of being genderfluid? I'm trying. he thinks you're cheating/losing interest, british grammar???

You're out on a walk with Hobie, him wanting to take you to his favourite punk shops - buying you whatever you liked from in there cause he's just happy you're liking his style. You're all skirts and blouses - but you don't always want to be that. Sometimes you like it, sometimes it makes you want to crawl out of your own skin because you want to be more masculine that day, week, however long, but you're limited. Baggy clothes just won't cut it anymore.

So, whilst you were sat on a bench, enjoying your food with Hobie and you saw a boy walk past who is just radiating gender envy into you, your eyes stayed glued to him. They way his clothes can be stuck to him with no chest in the way, his hair short but fluffy, his rings decorating his slender, short nailed fingers, Hobie notices. He noticed your lack of response to what he had said before, he looked at you. Then looked where you were looking, his brows pinching together. He then watched you stare at this guy with so much intensity, it's as if he wasn't here at all.

"Wha' Ya know 'im?" He asked, still staring at you and your body language, a familiar unease bubbling in his stomach from the last experiences he's had with unfaithful girlfriends.

"Huh? Oh..no, no I don't." You said, finally taking your eyes off him and making eye contact with your now unhappy, nervous boyfriend.

"Oh? Why you starin' like tha', then?" He grabbed the drink out you lap, taking a long sip of it whilst staring at you over the bottle. His throat feels dry. Is the bottle shaking? Why are his hands shaking?

"I liked..his tee shirt. It had a cool band on it." You lied through your teeth, and Hobie could tell. He slightly shifted in his seat, deciding to leave this little problem for when you were back at his flat.

"Aight.." He shrugged, putting all your stuff into a bag. "C'mon, les do the res' of the shops before they close." He mumbled as he stood up, and you were expecting him to take your hand, but he didn't, now giving you the uneasy feel of dread in the bottom of your stomach. What had you done? The rest of the walk around was mainly quiet, Hobie only making a few comments here and there, but he never actually spoke first. He was just replying to you. You walked back to his flat in the quiet, your hands in the pocket of his jacket he let you wear once it got cold. He's upset but you're still his girl. Are you his girl?

You furrowed your brows, trying to figure out where you went wrong this afternoon. You guys were having such a good time, 'why did he go quiet? Did he want the last cookie you took? No, he wouldn't get upset over something as silly as that. Did he not like the drink you chose? He drank it, it couldn't of been that bad. Why did he start asking about that guy that walke pas- oh fuck. He thinks I was checking him out. Fuck, fuck! how could you be so stupid? He sees his girlfriend starin' at a guy of course he's gonna assume that! How do I tell him I want to be him? Not be with him?'

You enter the flat behind him, shutting the door quietly behind you and taking off your shoes. You watch him wall over to his sofa, sitting himself down with a sigh before looking over to watch you. Seeing the worry and guilt etched onto your face, he spoke up.

"Ya' aight, doll?" He asked, almost in a whisper, not really wanting you to reply.

"We needa talk." You said, walking over towards him. He felt his heart drop, feeling like all his fears were coming true in one afternoon. He crossed his arms defensively over his chest, giving a small nod.

"Go on." He glanced off to the side.

"That guy today? I wasn't...I didn't check him out." You said, sitting in the armchair just opposite him, fiddling with your rings.

"Wha' was tha', then? Hm? 'Cause it certainly looked like you was checkin' 'im out." He said almost roughly, the tone making you wince. He's getting defensive, that's understandable.

"No, love - I wasn't. I..fuck. This is going to sound insane, and you're probably gonna feel differently once I say it but I have to say it, I do, i-"

"So say i'." He interrupted you, narrowing his eyes slightly, frowning.

"I...I didn't want to be with him- I just...I wanted to..be him." You admitted quietly, looking down at your hands. He paused, his frown growing but now in confusion. What?

"You...wanna be a boy?" He asked slowly and carefully.

"No- well, yeah. But only sometimes. I feel more masculine than I do feminine some days, but I've been unable to express that. So what you were seeing wasn't attraction, it was envy. Envy that he could look so boyish without even trying, just putting on clothes, not trying to be masculine." You huffed, your voice slightly saddened. Hobie was probably gonna feel completely different about you now.but it's better than him thinking you were going to cheat someday.

He stayed eerily quiet, staring at you. Studying you. Was that true? he couldn't tell. He's leaning more towards yes, though. Nobody would be this worried about this eccentric of a lie.

"Aight..'ow long 'ave you felt this way?" He carefully asked, sitting more upright.

"Since I was a kid, really. I only just realised recently what it was, though. My "tomboy" phase. When I started developing 'n' my clothes got baggier as my chest got bigger, but then I'd wear low cut things, I-..I'm sorry you only just found out - that I only just told you. I didn't know how to approach it, y'know? It's not an easy subject to come by. Hey it's your girlfriend, I sometimes don't wanna be your girlfriend cause I wanna be your boyfr-" He cut your rambling off by pressing a sweet kiss to your lips, his hand on your cheek. He brushed your hair behind your ear, pulling away from they kiss.

"Ay, listen. Tha's fine. I don' see ya any differently. Ya still the love of my life, yeah? Don' worry 'bout it, luv.If you wan', ya can have a bunch of my old clothes, for when ya feel like a lad. Can help you make fits." He comforted you, bringing you closer to him.

"Jus' tell me when ya' start feelin' like tha', yeah? I wouldn't wanna do sum' that makes my love uncomfortable." He said to you, kissing your cheek softly, then your temple, then your forehead. You smile, feeling like you could just cry from how accepting he was of that, of you.

"You'd really do that for me?" You mumbled, making him nod instantly.

"Of course, baby."

"And you don't feel any differently towards me?"

"No' in the sligh'est."

"You still love me?"

"I love you even more each second. Tha' ain't gon' change. I fell in love wit' ya, darlin'. Ain't gonna care 'bout you wantin' to be like that sometimes. Jus' means you can be like me." He smiled, kissing all over your face in-between his words, really wanting you to know he means that. You couldn't help it, a stray tear rolled down your cheek. And he wiped it away immediately.

"Nah, don' cry, my love. 'Cause then you're gon' make me cry." He mumbled, his hand sliding through your hair and to the back of your head, bringing you closer and kissing you again, sweetly and softly. You returned the kiss, of course. He gave you a few more quick kisses, before pulling away, his hand staying put.

"You wan' go pick sum aftershave ou' from my collection?" He offered.

© WEBDOLLZZ 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒.

[causewealwayshaveeachother]

she/they bi trans butch lesbian nick

bc. nick dresses like a butch lesbian

pins: x x x / ritual 6 / ID in alt text

some hcs:

nick is very much the sort of "i am a woman because i'm a lesbian" sort of gender

not nonbinary, just likes she/they pronouns

she's out to her family, and to her girlfriend (and her girlfriend's dad) and that's it. coming out is hard. it means people asking questions and changing perceptions and losing friends. there's also just, like, so many steps. there's too many things you need to do. hell. hell. what if they just didn't -> it also might mean getting switched to the girls' lacrosse team, and like, nick is all for trans inclusivity in sports, but like, these are her guys. and also the team she knows how to work with. really, they ought to make it co-ed

nick is the handsomest butch princess at the princess dance party <3 -> alternatively, nick attending a short-notice princess dance party in her normal clothes + a pink feather boa and plastic tiara for that nuanced gender experience

nick's little sister is the coolest kid in her class because she has a "secret sister" -> adults assume this is an imaginary friend. kids assume she's a superspy like kim possible. nick's sister doesn't confirm or deny anything because she's good at secrets

carrie likes having "girls' nights" and painting nick's nails while they gossip and vent. nick doesn't get any particular gender euphoria from having painted nails, but it is gender affirming in the "this is a thing girls do together" sense

nick's very happy with their gender presentation, actually

being only out to carrie is part of why they stay in their on/off relationship for so long; nick doesn't want to lose being able to go over to carrie's house and just vibe knowing that all 2 people there know she's a girl. she really doesn't want to have to come out to more people -> nick liked hanging out with carrie more before they were dating. but there's no going back now! -> it's not like you can just go back to being friends with your ex or anything!!

nick, posessed by caleb: well THAT's definitely not my gender. nice to have those lingering doubts handily done away with. also, i would like to not be posessed please

nick is now significantly less okay with being constantly misgendered by 99% of everyone they know! -> cause yk. being possessed by a transphobic ghost pretending to be you for months. it has what one might call An Effect

after all the caleb stuff, nick ends up hanging out with the whole ghost band gang more & makes trans friends for the first time! -> they also learn that you can, actually, go back to being friends with your ex, if you're willing to like, have an honest conversation and talk it out

with all the openly trans people in the ghost band gang (flynn, luke, willie, reggie in particular as a fellow transfem) nick feels a lot more comfortable and undaunted by the idea of coming out to them since, like, they already know what's up -> nick's like what's up i'm a she/they bi lesbian and flynns like damn same and then they high five

bc she's now regularly hanging out with a whole bunch of people who know her pronouns and thus hearing them used with some regularity, she starts to get used to it for the first time :) -> downside: now it feels bad when people don't use them. that plus yk. The Caleb Thing means that now they kinda really want to be out, instead of relegating All That to a nebulous future where it's easy and not complicated. Oh Fuck That's So Much Shit To Do. luckily, she has her friends by her side :)

julie and flynn (and luke and alex and reggie and willie and the molinas) help motivate & support her to actually go through with coming out instead of just continuing-not-to-but-now-it-feels-bad -> and help her remember & deal with all the Billion Fucking Steps and Paperwork. executive dysfunction is easier with a friend<3

when nick comes out publicly, she literally just starts wearing pronoun pins. no other changes in appearance whatsoever. she already dressed exactly how she liked :)

when she gets her name legally changed, she just changes it to nick, bc changing your legal name to a nickname of your deadname rules

[bisluthq]

maybe this is a dumb question but nat, are you sure you're not trans? or have like a dysmorphia thing? because you project into men a lot, in like every aspect (i'm sorry if this is like rude or intrusive, feel free to not answer)

Defs not lmao like I’m VERY cis lol. I’ve thought about it SO MUCH. Like first things first: I write as a persona - it reflects on me obviously but like y’all don’t know me tbh and I do explain that frequently. Next like why I know I’m very cis: in terms of who I like being friends with primarily, how I think, how I behave, how I dress, how I style myself etc I’m VERY effeminate and very fucking cis. Like Kinsey 0 gender vibes which are rare in someone as gay as me. I can barely wear pants tbh like I like skirts and dresses and maybe leggings and shorts but like long pants are already too boyish for me and I feel uncomfy. I can do rompers but only if they’re like ~very cute. The only flannel I’ve ever worn are little tartan miniskirts when I was dressing up as Rachel Berry lol. I love presenting as a girl tbh.

The only problem is I’m also… gay…

And it’s fun for me to talk about like yk thirsting for women unapologetically without clouding it in like “well we don’t know if she’s gay well this is just friendship well this is just someone being polite well this will never happen well tbh this is ~wrong well tbh this isn’t sex well tbh let’s talk about boys.”

Like it’s nice to just be like “BOOBS” and shit.

And like OBVIOUSLY I would prefer to be… not deviant… and therefore born as cis but a man - because I can relate to being cis tbh far more than I can understand being like GNC even to the point of most gay women - with this same sexuality. I’d be so great at it lmao like I’d be just fruity enough to be quirky and fun and like I’d be deadass able to say I’m straight and everyone would be like “so true why do freaks doubt that tbh?? You’re just fun!!!” If I was into the EXACT OPPOSITE of stuff I’m into and born a man and like everything I’m not I’d be SO normal.

But I… ya enjoy being a girl as the song goes. Like in every fucking way except the liking boys part.

I love my body tbh (well the femininity) there are issues in terms of insecurity, I love dressing super effeminate - skirts and high heels and like cute undies, wearing makeup, having long hair, listening to girly music, reading girly books, “doing” girly shit like cooking and shopping and going to the spa and taking selfies, I prefer being friends with girls, I cannot deal with anything other than she/her pronouns etc. I LOVE presenting as a girl and honestly can’t imagine like doing otherwise.

I just also… really like to have sex with girls and that’s very fucking confusing to me and that’s why I like this platform because it’s a chance to express myself in a different way lmao and talk about stuff I don’t like HIDE irl because I’m out but wouldn’t like bring up over brunch with my gals. That’s the power of the internet tbh 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ it’s being able to write about boobies and pussy and shit and then put on a pretty dress and go to brunch.

I contain multitudes lol 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ and I do write very honestly but it is also a persona because I can’t like share every aspect of me with this many people every day. It’s just not healthy.

But ya there you go. Like Kinsey -1 gender vibes lmao like girliest girl alive and like Kinsey… idk fucking 5 sexuality but unlike the gender stuff that confuses me because comphet and sluttiness and also just how DEEPLY cis I am making it feel weird to be like… this gay.

[gdragonsideburns]

.

I really hate the way cis people think pronouns=gender bc I (as a trans person) SUCK at pronouns and get them wrong for everyone (inclu cis people, think it’s something to do with me being naturally non verbal) so to them it looks like I don’t get peoples gender right.

Whereas I’m just a silly goofy dude who can’t speak but yk actually changes how I think of the person gender wise In my head bc pronouns don’t equal gender. It’s also why I get dysphoria when people call me she her, literally ONLY bc I know cis people are viewing me as a woman even if they say they aren’t.

The amount of cis men that have said they’re straight, KNOWN I’m trans, then tried to fuck me ENRAGES me. Like yeah maybe I present pretty femme but I love femininity the same way a very camp man does it’s not my gender it’s my aesthetic, I’m a very masc person just not visibly and for them to call themselves straight and try fuck me just means they think of me as a women internally and externally. I wish only trans people could look at me.

ALSO I’m into dudes but EXPLICITLY in a gay way and it’s so upsetting bc I know cis men think of me as female and that is bad but what’s worse is they don’t view any relationship between us as gay (and neither does the public) which is horrific and dysphoria inducing.

God this gender thing sucks sometimes. I would go t4t but I’m some kind of gray/Demi ace and I fucking LOVE romance so I take it when I get it (which is almost never I don’t have a lot of friends lol) and I just have to put up with this shit bc I tried dating and I felt nothing, over and over, and then they all wanted something and like ? Who’s gonna say yes to being my friend for 4-6 business months just to see if I could potentially develop feelings for them ? Also like I’m autistic most people exhaust me .

[aaronexplainsitall]

since you talked about the predatory older gay man stereotype, you think it plays a part in why the larry part of the fandom hates nick grinshaw so much? i mean, he used to take harry to gay clubs and stuff, and i imagine he helped harry with some stuff and probably taught him a few things. it's just... nick is the only guy people seem to hate so much, yk?

This anon is actually weeks old, but a lot of the posts I was seeing this morning made me think of it. There are portions of our section of the fandom who dislike Nick simply because Gryles was theoretically pushed really hard at one stage (although as someone who wasn't in the fandom, it wasn't something I ever heard) and it's just a topic that brings back bad memories. There are some people, however, who claim or imply that Nick wants to fuck Harry and hates Louis, and that's more tied up in subtly homophobic stereotypes. I don't think I'd necessarily call it the predatory older gay stereotype, I'm not sure Nick is actually old enough to really qualify, but it's definitely part and parcel of the idea that gay men can't be friends with each other without ending up fucking. Straight people pushed this idea in the '70s and '80s to present same gender attracted men as perverted or sex obsessed and to break down our friendships and the community bonds we had. The idea that gay men are less likely to be faithful in a relationship or to respect someone else's relationship is boring nonsense, and you'd have a hard time convincing me that this stereotype doesn't play into people's dislike of Nick. People see it: Nick wants to fuck Harry / Nick hates Louis / Harry doesn't care enough about Louis' feelings / Harry continues being friends with Nick / Louis is hurt. And that's what my reblog of the post saying that some people here think they love Louis more than Harry does was all about.