#my mom kept offering to take over and i let her a couple times when i was at my absolute limit

[feline-insolitum]

had a pots flare up and thought i was gonna die while i was making dinner for my family its ok though they all thought it was yummy

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for poisoning a child over mountain dew?

For context, I (17) have a developed a slight addiction to mountain dew over quarantine. it's one of my favorite soft drinks. Every month I buy a case of it with my own money when my parents do their monthly grocery shopping and that is my allotted stashe for the month. However, I've noticed for about two years now that my stashe is running out sooner than I expected, the first few times I've simply thought I miss calculated but later I suspected it was being stolen after I kept rigorous track of how much I drank. I told my parents but they said I shouldn't get so worked up over it, and if I really wanted to keep it safe I should keep it locked up somewhere. So I did. Afterwards, almost weekly I've had our maid/housekeeper(a distant cousin of my mom's- we do pay her) ask me for my soda. I suspected that she might've been the soda stealer so out of spite I refused to give her from "my" stashe, instead offering to buy some/give her the money and she refused. Even after that, a couple months later I've noticed it running out sooner again. I pointed it out to my parents and they did nothing still. I hid my keys. It stopped the stealing for a few weeks but then it started again. I've confronted her about it but she denies it and blames me for for suspecting her when she does so much for us. And my mom refuses to discuss it with her either, saying I'm making such a big deal out of something like soda and that I probably miscalculated anyways. I've taken photographic evidence of my shit going missing (taking a photo before going to school and coming home with a bottle missing) and still she say to "let it go". At this point, it's not even about the soda for me. It's about the fact I brought this shit with my own money and it's being stolen EVEN AFTER I TRIED EVERYTHING TO PREVENT IT and its been going on for TWO YEARS. And I can't help but feel paranoid and suspect her whenever any of my other possessions start disappearing.

Here comes the poisoning part. I've recently developed some gastrointestinal issues, so I have to take prescribed laxatives. I've had enough of my shit being stolen and I've decided whoever steals it needs to shit themselves and maybe then they'll stop. I marked out a few bottles and carefully opened them and mixed in the laxative(About half dose per bottle) before resealing them thoroughly. I put them in front of all the other non-laced drinks so they're the easiest ones to grab. Sure enough, they've been stolen. And a few days later she comes to my mom complaining that her grandson keeps getting diarrhea and she has no idea why. I told her maybe she shouldn't feed a <10 yr old mountain dew and she was like, "How do you know it was the dew that caused it?" I just shrugged and told her I had a hunch, but with the way she stared at me I think she understood what I had did. Later on my mom yelled at me for pulling that stunt, and I was honestly sick of her shit and told her next time I'm mixing in rat poison and I wont even be labeling the laced ones. like. stop taking my shit without asking. especially shit i brought with my own money.

What are these acronyms?

[minniesmutt]

⚠︎ ━━━ MINE

⚠︎ ━━━  WC: 2K

⚠︎ ━━━  CONTENT: FOOD METNTIONS, PRAISE, PREGNANT SEX, INNIE IS A GENTLEMAN, ORAL (F. REC), FINGERING, UNPROTECTED SEX, CREAMPIE

     “You don’t have to go back home all the time, you know that right?” Jeongin groaned as Y/n cleaned up his living room from the pizza orders

     “I don’t wanna invade your space more than I have been,” Y/n said

     “You’re not. I’m the one who invited you over,” Jeongin told her

     “In,” Y/n whined as he stopped her from cleaning

     “Do you work tomorrow?” He asked as he sat her next to him on the couch again

     “No,” Y/n sighed

     “Stay the night.”     “M’kay,” Y/n agreed, “Let me finish cleaning though.”

     “No, sit,” Jeongin stood and cleaned for her. Y/n giggled at him and checked her email while she waited for him to finish.

     “What’s with the face?” Jeongin asked as he sat back next to her.

     “Email from my building management,” Y/n told him.

     “Everything okay?”

     “Yeah, just a reminder my lease is up in a few months and I need to renew it soon.”

     “Is he still on your lease?” 

     “No. I talked to the management about him the last time I had to renew. He never paid his half anyways.”

     “You gonna renew?”

     “I don’t know if I’m going to be able to afford to stay there anymore when the baby comes. I don’t even know if I’ll be able to find a place and move in before the baby gets here. I could move in with Hana again but I still have to talk to her about it.”

     “You don’t have to agree, but you could move in here. Make it easier when the baby gets here and not moving him back and forth constantly.”

     “In…” Y/n looked at him

     “I’m just trying to think ahead. You don’t have to, but I’m putting the option out there.”

     “I’ll take it into consideration,” Y/n told him as she closed her phone, setting it on the coffee table.

     The two sat back on the couch, continuing to watch the drama that Jeongin had put on when they were eating dinner. Y/n had adjusted herself to be more comfortable a couple of times before Jeongin suggested moving them to the bedroom so she could lie down comfortably.

    The two moved and Jeongin set her up comfortably on the bed under the covers and put on the show for them on the bedroom TV. Y/n rested her head on his shoulder as she kept her eyes on the TV. Slowly, the two somehow shifted closer. His arm wrapped around her while she rested on his chest. Getting interrupted by his phone as she was falling asleep, “Sorry,” Jeongin apologized

     Jeongin grabbed his phone and left the room to take the call. Y/n laid back and continued watching the show. Jeongin came back a few minutes later and got back into bed with her again. “Who called?” Y/n asked

     “My mom. Asked how the appointment went. Says congratulations on us having a boy,” he clued her in

     “Think she’ll help plan the baby shower?” Y/n asked as she looked up at him

     “She did ask about it. Offered the house to host it at.” Jeongin looked down at her 

     “I love your mom,” Y/n smiled

     “I’ll tell her next time she calls,” Jeongin laughed, pulling her closer to him again

     Y/n smiled up at him as her arm draped over his middle. Jeongin leaned his forehead on hers, returning the smile. “You look like you’re thinking,” Y/n said

     “I am.”

     “About?”

     “How I kind of regret saying to go slow because I kind of wanna kiss you. Especially after shopping all day…”

     Y/n leaned forward and placed her lips on his. Not giving him another second to think about it. It took a second for the man to respond then he wrapped his arms around her and held her as close as he could with her bump between them. 

     Y/n smiled and cupped his face. Both melted into the kiss as he rolled them both over so he was on top. His hands held onto her hips as the kiss deepened. Y/n moaned into the kiss before he pulled away and looked down at her. “You okay?” He asked, kissing her cheeks

     “Yeah,” Y/n said as he trailed his lips down to her neck

     Jeongin didn’t say anything as he pulled away from her neck. He reached over and grabbed a pillow from the other side of the bed, moving her to get the pillow under her for her back.

     “I said I was okay,” Y/n said

     “You fell asleep on your back three days ago and you woke me up at four am, yelling at me for not turning you on your side.”

     “I said sorry,” Y/n pouted

     “You’re lucky you’re cute,” Jeongin kissed her pout.

     Y/n wrapped her arms around his neck, “Just cute?”

     Jeongin hummed as he returned to kissing her neck. “Cute. Amazing. Funny. Hot. The mother of my child. All mine.” he said between kisses, getting closer to her collarbone

     “Your’s?” Y/n asked

     “Mine,” Jeongin confirmed

     Y/n smiled as she looked up at him. His eyes seemed to be holding so many emotions. Jeongin leaned down to her lips again, pressing them together. Y/n moaned into his mouth. Jeongin mumbled more praises against her lip before he moved back to her neck again. Y/n moaned as he lightly bit the side of her neck. Her fingers grabbed at the hairs at the nape of his neck.

     “Wish I remembered the first time we slept together,” Jeongin muttered into her skin.

     “Second time?” Y/n suggested

     “Right now?”

     “Please.”

     Jeongin looked up at her, “You sure?”

     “I’m really good at begging In. I’ll do it.”

     “Another time,” Jeongin smiled as he leaned down and attacked her lips again.

     Y/n moaned as he adjusted her legs around his waist. Y/n could feel him growing as he pressed against her. Y/n tightened her legs around him while his hands slipped under her shirt. Pushing the fabric up while he slipped his tongue past the seal of her lips.

     Y/n slipped her hands from his hair as their tongues danced between them and worked on unbuttoning his shirt. Jeongin rolled his hips against hers making her moan into his mouth. His hands moved down from pushing her shirt up and unbuttoned her pants. Gently lifting her hips and pulling the fabric down. 

     He pulled away from her lips as she got the last button undone. Jeongin tossed off the shirt and the tank top underneath along with her pants. Y/n sat up as best she could before he helped her get her shirt and bra off. 

     “You’re so beautiful,” Jeongin muttered as he kissed her neck again 

     Y/n whined as he moved down. Kissing down between her breasts, over her growing stomach then over her clothed cunt. Jeongin laid down on his stomach as he put her legs over his shoulder after pulling the last bit of fabric off of her. 

     Y/n shivered as his tongue ran up from her entrance to her clit then his lips wrapped around the bud. Y/n grabbed onto the sheets under her as he all but devoured her. Jeongin moaned into her as he subtly humped the mattress. Mumbling praises that didn’t reach her ears but he would gladly repeat later. 

     “In,” Y/n moaned as his tongue just barely dipped into her

     “Yeah, baby?” He asked

     “Finger… please…” Y/n begged

     “Yeah? Need me to fill your pretty pussy with my fingers. So wet already,” He rambled as he pushed his middle finger into her.

     Y/n moaned as his finger curled up into her. Grabbing onto his hair to ground herself better. Just making the man below her moan as he continued pumping his finger in and out of her. Lips and tongue worked her clit as she moaned his name. 

     Jeongin slipped another finger into her, making her tighten her grip on his hair. He kept his pace steady while her legs tightened around his head. “‘M close,” Y/n whined

     He hummed in response and kept his pace steady. Helping her get closer and closer til he finally tipped her over. Her cum covered his fingers as he stayed there until her grip on him loosened. He gently put her legs back on the bed as he sat up and pulled his fingers out of her, licking them clean, taking pride as he watched her face flush. He pulled his fingers out of his mouth and leaned back down to her lips, letting her taste herself off them.

     “How you feelin’ baby?” He asked between kisses

     “Good. Need more.” 

     “Yeah? Tell me what you need baby.”

     Jeongin’s lips wandered again, making her lose her thoughts alongside her post-orgasm brain. “In…”

     “Words love. Need you to tell me what you need no matter how hard it is in that pretty brain of yours.”

     “Cock,” Y/n moaned

     “Where?”

     “Inside…”

     “Inside where? You’re pretty mouth or your pussy?”

     “Pussy… Innie please.”

     Jeongin hummed as he sat back and pulled off his pants and boxers. Chucking them onto the floor with the rest of their clothes. 

     “Condom?” He asked

     “Doesn’t matter. Won’t make a difference and I’m clean.”

     “I’m clean too.”

     Jeongin lined himself up with her entrance and slowly pushed in. He grabbed onto her hands and pinned them onto the pillow below. Taking his time to sink into her and letting her adjust to him. Retelling her all the praises that she didn’t hear earlier. Kissing her for the umpteenth time now. Letting her get used to him fully inside her till she begged him to move. 

     Jeongin sat up a bit but kept their hands together. Slowly pulling his hips back and pushing back interesting her. Keeping up the pace and not rocking her too much. Only going faster when she asked him though it was more like begging. Smiling to himself as her legs wrapped around his waist tight. 

     He leaned down and kissed everywhere he could on her neck, leaving a couple of marks he was sure would bruise later. Y/n gripped his hands tighter as he left his mark on her while his hips knocked into her.

     Y/n moaned as a certain angle hit the right spot inside her. Her back arching off the pillow just a bit. Begging him to hit there again. Jeongin happily obliged and repositioned them a bit to get to that spot again. Picking up his pace more as he twitched inside her. Orgasm approaching quickly. 

     “Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath as he sat up more, taking one hand away from hers and rolling his thumb over her clit. Y/n moaned louder at the added stimulation on her already sensitive clit. Her now free hand gripping the pillow under her head before the high blindsided her. 

     Jeongin groaned as she clamped down around him. Making it a bit harder but he managed. Fucking her through her high again until her moans turned to whines and he came inside her. Pushing himself into her and painting her walls white. Groaning a few times as he thrusted a few more times into her. Burying himself in her once he was finished.

     Both of them lay in the afterglow for a minute, catching their breaths before looking at each other. “Hi,” Y/n breathed

     “Hi mama,” Jeongin smiled

     “I like when you call me that,” Y/n smiled

     “Good. I’m gonna keep calling you that.” Jeongin leaned down and kissed her again

     Y/n moaned into his mouth before pulling back, “Getting uncomfortable?” he asked

     “Little bit,” Y/n answered

     “Let me pull out and get you cleaned up.” Jeongin pecked her lips before slowly pulling out of her before getting up to clean up. Going to the bathroom then coming back. Gently cleaning her up and fixing the covers and pillows before joining her back on the bed. Spooning her and rubbing her belly

     “Can I ask a bit of a dumb question?” Y/n asked

     “You’re questions are never dumb.” 

     “What are we?”

     “Mm,” Jeongin kissed her shoulder, “How does being boyfriend and girlfriend sound?”

     “I like that.”

     “I was just waiting for you to be ready.”

     “You’re too good for me.”

     “Think I’m perfect for you.” Jeongin chuckled behind her

     “Ego,” Y/n rolled her eyes

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[peachhcs]

a fic or blurb of ryan’s farewell party for will pls?!

charm bracelet

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

samy heads to boston after ryan begs her to fly out for will’s farewell party in hopes of reconciling things between the ex-couple (writing grace and samy’s dynamic was actually so fun because i’ve never wrote them before)

2.1k words

i got so carried away with this it wasn’t gonna be this long but it turned into a whole fic. the ending of this is a bit interpret how you want, but in my mind it’s them not completely ignoring one another, but they aren’t gonna talk it out for a long while. p.s. the baby grace and will photo i found is actually adorable!

au masterlist

"please come?" ryan begged over the phone while samy sat at her desk pondering the offer he'd been trying to convince her of for the last twenty minutes. "if not for will, then for us? don't know when we'll see you if you aren't coming out to boston as often anymore," the brunette continued making samy feel even worse.

"hey, i'll still come to boston. i didn't just go for will, you know," the girl rolled her eyes slightly.

"then come out to see us. you don't even have to see will if you don't want. there will be enough people that you'll probably be able to avoid him," ryan kept persisting because 1. he knew samy still cared deep down and 2. she was their friends too and he knew the guys really wanted to see her again before school started back up.

"you're so annoying," she teased a bit making them both laugh. "i'll think about it, okay? i might have to be back at school, but i'll see."

"promise?"

"i promise," samy nodded and the two ended the call. when her phone found its place back on her desk, samy knew damn well already that she was completely free that weekend. she just didn't know if she could stomach potentially seeing will.

—

two weeks later, samy and her mom were on a plane to boston for the party. ellen was still very close to colleen and after being there for will his entire life, she wasn't missing this despite everything that's happened.

gabe and ryan drove into the city the day before to catch up with samy themselves. will didn't have much idea that the hughes were in town and probably wouldn't find out until tomorrow at the party.

"hey, hughesy," ryan greeted with a large smile. his arms quickly slid around the girl's frame in a tight hug before letting gabe take his turn.

"hi, it's good to see you guys again," samy grinned widely. she really did miss seeing them. it'd been since worlds that they were all together like this.

"i'm glad you came out. i didn't think you would," gabe admitted as the three sat at a small table waiting for the waiter to take their orders.

"i didn't think i was coming either, but i wanted to see you guys before school started and we'd get too caught up in everything," the brunette explained which made them smile.

"i can't believe school's gonna start again. feels like it just ended," gabe chuckled.

"don't remind me," ryan groaned earning more laughs from the other two.

the three quickly filled each other in on the things they missed. it felt like old times when everyone was in michigan together spending weekends sitting on a floor going back and forth with stupid little games. all of that felt like such simpler times because no feelings were involved. at least not any known feelings.

things settled a bit as samy and the boys ate their sandwiches they ordered and the topic shifted to one samy knew was gonna come up eventually.

"i don't know if i've said this to you, but will's a real idiot," gabe said quietly.

samy's jaw clenched a bit, "yeah, he is."

"have you..talked to him at all?" ryan wondered and the girl instantly shook her head.

"no and i don't really want to. i don't even know what i'd say to him or what he could say that would make me forgive him. he threw it all away and that really fucking hurts," samy admitted truthfully.

"right and you have every right to not wanna talk to him. he was an asshole for not trying to talk things out with you," gabe nodded in agreement.

"can i just say one thing though? i'm no way trying to defend anything that he said or did, but you gotta remember how will is with this kind of stuff sometimes. he says the wrong things when he's thinking something else. you guys were best friends above everything. you know him better than any of us probably. you really want to leave things on this note?" ryan said softly.

samy's gaze flicked away from the boys knowing ryan did have a small point in the back of her mind, but she wasn't ready to admit that. things were confusing and hard.

being back in boston had this pull on her. everything she's ever known came from michigan and boston—will being one of those things. he hurt her so badly, yet a really, really small part of her wanted to reach out.

"it doesn't matter anymore, ry. he meant what he said and even if he didn't wanna say it, he still did. i was basically worthless to him," samy couldn't though. her head overruled her heart knowing she needed to stand her ground because there was nothing more she could say to him.

—

will's entire house was packed with people. room to room, wall to wall, lawn to lawn—there were people everywhere. ryan wasn't wrong that samy could lose herself pretty easily into the crowd.

she hung outside a lot because out there she could escape anywhere if she saw will whereas inside could end up trapping her if she wasn't careful. she happily caught up with drew, aram, vote, and cutter who greeted her with bright smiles.

the idea of even being in the same proximity as will sent goosebumps down the girl's arms. her eyes were constantly flicking around as if she would see him turn some corner and make eye contact.

somehow, she managed to find a corner where it wasn't too crowded by the lawn chairs. the youngest hughes sat out on them just people watching when familiar locks of blonde hair started coming her way. for a moment, samy tensed, wondering how grace took the news about their breakup because she hadn't exactly talked to the oldest smith sibling since it happened.

"hey, samy," the older girl greeted warmly.

"hi, gracie," samy smiled, relaxing a bit when she saw the girl's smile.

"i'm happy to see you. it's been awhile," grace found a seat beside her for a moment while the brunette nodded a bit.

"yeah, it has," her gaze flicked away because they both knew why it had been awhile since they saw one another. grace didn't make a huge appearance at the family vacation a few months ago since she was busy apartment hunting and even then, her and samy didn't talk much because they never got to catch one another at the right time.

"this might be a stupid question, but..how are you?" the older girl wondered gently.

"i'm..i'm okay. hanging in there, i guess," samy nodded, biting the inside of her cheek.

"i'm sorry i haven't talked to you since..i don't want you to think i hate you or anything. last month was super busy and you looked busy and i didn't know if it was too soon to ask about everything.." grace trailed off a bit when she realized she was rambling. samy quickly shook her head.

"don't worry about it. i was worried you hated me," a small laugh sounded from the soccer players lips.

"oh my god no! i don't. i promise. i actually..am mad at will for how all of this happened. i..i was shocked when you left and i found will out there..i'm sorry. i..i wish i had an answer for my brother's reason, but i don't. i..i don't know why he broke up with you," grace frowned deeply.

"i left in such a mess, i'm sorry again. everything happened way too fast," samy shook her head.

"have you talked to him since.."

"ry and gabe asked me that yesterday and i said no. i mean, i have nothing to say to him, so why would i, you know?" the brunette shrugged.

"right, of course. mom told him this morning you and your mom were coming. that went over..interesting to say the least," grace tapped her finger against her cup.

"i've been avoiding him, i guess. i'm not sure i can really stomach seeing him, but..i don't know. felt like i owed it to him to be here at least? and the other guys too. don't know when i'll see them again. this whole thing feels like it screwed up everything with everyone," samy laughed dryly.

"i get it. i'm glad you did come. i saw your mom earlier, it was good to see her. even if will won't admit it, i know he's glad you're at least here too. one last hurrah before we move him out to california," grace said.

samy thought back to all the times will would talk about his move to cali whenever it happened. he'd always say how she'd fly out with him to help him decorate his apartment when the time came. plus, all the times will told her how he couldn't wait until they could live together so long distance would be over, yet he'd wait forever for her.

god, what happened to that will?

"you're thinking," the blonde pointed out, snapping samy back into reality.

while will knew her insanely well, so did grace. the two girls did grow up alongside one another even though there was a three year age gap. grace was the older sister samy never had as a little girl and she still was, so of course the older girl knew when samy was lost in thought.

"yeah, sorry," the younger girl shook her head.

"penny for your thoughts?" the expression made samy smile because will said the same thing.

"just how will always talked about me being there with him when he moved to california and how he couldn't wait until i was done with school to move out there with him. i wonder where that will went who was so ambitious about us and saying he would wait forever for me," the younger girl smiled sadly.

a little sigh escaped grace's lips hearing samy sound so heartbroken still. "i wish i knew what was running through his mind. i didn't even know he was considering it. it shocked the hell out of all of us. he's in there still somewhere, i know it and i know you don't wanna hear that, but i gotta believe it. i have never seen my brother like someone as much as he likes you, it confuses me how he just threw it all away like that," the blonde shook her head.

"you and me both," samy frowned this time.

"i think you just gotta give it time because damn, all of us believed you guys were it for each other. you'll find your way back, i think you two just need some space. will needs to settle in california and play a few games with the sharks and then i'm sure he'll come around. i don't believe this is the true end for you guys," grace said firmly.

the youngest hughes wanted to believe her so badly, but she just couldn't.

"maybe. it's hard to say though," samy said instead of being a complete pessimist about it.

the party ended a few hours later with samy successfully avoiding any contact with will. she didn't even see him which was surprising because she knew he was making his rounds.

her and her mom drove back to the hotel in silence just unwinding from the long day and talking to everyone they saw.

samy was brushing her teeth when her mom stuck her head in. the younger girl raised her eyebrow in confusion.

"i have a gift from you from someone i spoke to today," ellen said vaguely. the brunette raised her eyebrow.

"who?"

mrs. hughes didn't say anything while she just placed the envelope into samy's hand. the girl saw her name scribbled across the top in handwriting that she quickly recognized as will's. samy's gaze snapped to her mom's.

"i told him he's gonna do great in san jose," ellen said because she knew her daughter knew who that envelope was from.

the older woman slipped out of the bathroom leaving samy with the gift in her hand. she should've thrown it away, but curiosity got the better of her and she carefully ripped it open.

there wasn't any note or card, only a small charm of a shark.

her eyes danced to the charm bracelet sitting on her wrist that held her most precious charms.

will knew everything about her charm bracelet because he supplied most of the charms on the chain.

she remembered seeing the shark charm in some little gift shop with will many months ago, quickly mumbling something about how adorable it was and would fit the aesthetic for will's soon to be san jose career.

she had no idea will went back to buy it for her.

samy even wondered how long he's had it for.

without a word, samy clipped it onto the chain, adding one more pretty charm to her bracelet and a tiny smile painted her lips.

[flemingsfreckles]

Physio’s Daughter pt.4

Jessie Fleming x Physio!Reader

Read the previous parts here

Warnings: a little cursing, a small bit of homophobia (it’s minor teasing by a child)

WC: 4.3k

A/N: I struggled with this part, so I do apologize for how long it took and that it’s shorter. There’s a lot of timeline jumps in this part just as a heads up. I know where the story is going to end up I’m just having a hard time making the plot to get it there.

It was Jessie’s fault your attempt at being just coworkers failed so quickly. It was only hours after you had said goodbye to her in the lobby of the training center when you received a notification on your phone.

_jessflem has requested to follow you

You smirked down at the notification. You knew she wasn’t big on social media so the follow felt intentional. You open your phone to accept her follow request and go to follow her back only to realize you already followed her. You also weren’t too keen on social media, you really didn’t have the time with school, but you found yourself in typical behavior with the other young adults your age, “stalking” Jessie’s page.

You scroll all the way to her last photo, it’s just a scenery shot. You look at it for a second before starting to scroll back up. Too frenzied with your scrolling you feel the phone vibrate in your hand slightly, the same way it vibrated if you liked a photo.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck” you stop your scrolling, starting to slowly scroll backward to see that you had just liked a photo from 2020. Four years ago. It was one of her smiling, holding a soccer ball in her Chelsea training kit. She looked adorable.

Jessie Fleming: Doing a bit of stalking, are we?

The sound of your text notification making you jump in your otherwise silent apartment. Before you can even open the first text you receive a second.

Jessie Fleming: Do you stalk all your coworkers, or just the ones you’ve kissed?

You: Hard to say, I haven’t kissed any other coworkers, maybe I’ll have to kiss some other ones and see if it leads to stalking.

Jessie Fleming: Fair

You leave her text without a response. You had both agreed to be professional, this seemed like it was going to maybe be the opposite of you kept texting her.

You close Instagram and move from your couch into the kitchen. You were excited for your next few days to be off days. You planned to essentially do nothing but sit, watch trashy TV and do anything to keep your mind from wandering and thinking about Jessie. Moving to the fridge you get out some ingredients to make yourself chicken and pasta, it was easy but it also counted as a home cooked dinner so you couldn’t complain.

In the middle of digging through your cabinets for spices you get a knock on your door. Skeptical of who it may be, you move to the door slowly, looking though the peep hole. There stood your Mom, not someone coming to murder you, well, you’re not too sure on that you think.

You open the door to see her standing with a bouquet of flowers and a brown paper bag tucked under her arm.

“Can I come in?” She wasn’t exactly the person you wanted to be seeing right now but she was your Mom, so you extended you hand to take the bag and let her in.

“Are you here to yell at me again, because I’ve honestly had enough over the past couple of days to last a lifetime, I don’t need any more.”

“Don’t be a smartass,” she gently smacks the top of your head. “I’m actually here to apologize. Do you think I’d bring snacks and drinks if I was here to yell at you?”

“Maybe you brought them to flaunt in my face while you yelled at me.”

Your Mom rolls her eyes at you and begins digging through the bag she brought. She gets out some candies that she knew you loved, some popcorn, a bottle of wine, and a 6 pack of beers.

“Is this your peace offering?” You ask as you grab the bag of sweets, opening it and popping one in your mouth.

“I don’t know if I’d consider it a peace offering just yet but I wanted to at least talk, I figured I could start making amends with snacks.”

“Okay.”

“Look, I’m not really sorry for what I said, I said it for a reason and I stand by what I said.” She lets out a breath. “But I am sorry for how I said it though. I treated you like a child, that was unprofessional, you’re an adult and should be treated that way at work at least. Unfortunately, I’m your mom, so you’ll always be my little girl. And in this circumstance I was frustrated with you as a mom and as a coworker.”

“Why were you frustrated with me as a mom?” You understood the coworker, but the thought of you disappointing your Mom hurt a bit, you hadn’t realized you had upset her as a daughter.

“I don’t know if frustrated is the word I guess. It’s just weird seeing your daughter being defiled against the wall by another person especially at work when it’s with her coworker who she told you nothing was happening with.” Your blush comes back and you look down at your drink before taking a large swing, not wanting to think about your Mom walking in on you and Jessie.

“How many times do I have to tell you she wasn’t defiling me, it was just a kiss.”

“I don’t really care what she was doing to you, the less I know the better.” You Mom holds her hands up stopping you. “I am sorry I made a scene in your office about it. That was inappropriate on my end.”

“Thank you.” You take another sip. The two of you stood in silence around your kitchen table. This was going to be a long night.

It was nearly an hour later, you were drinking through your fourth beers and your Mom was working through her third heavy pour of wine. You could tell you were both feeling the effects of the drinks and it was likely your Mom would be spending the night. You felt your phone buzz in your lap and you looked down to see Jessie’s name again.

Jessie Fleming: sorry if I made it weird with my text from before, I promise only to be professional from now on.

You feel yourself smiling at the text, something about the idea that she thought about you again to text you made you feel warm and fuzzy. Unfortunately, with the alcohol in your system you did a worse job at hiding your emotions than you thought.

“Ohhhhh, look at you smiling at your phone, let me guess is a certain Canadian captain texting you?” Your mom teases from the other side of the couch. Her foot giving your leg a tap.

“Mom please.” While you tried to deflect her comment it was obvious by your smile that she was right about who had texted you and she knew she was right. You didn’t want to have to sit here with your tipsy mother and her comments about you and Jessie. Thankfully she stays quiet for a few minutes with the two of you not speaking.

“This is maybe the wrong way to go about this, but I’m trying really hard to be your Mom, not your coworker, so, tell me about her? Pretend I don’t already know her, pretend you’re telling me about just a crush from school or something.”

“Mom, we don't have to do this.”

“Oh come on, indulge me, I miss it. I remember when you were a little girl and you would come home telling me about the pretty girls in your class, and then in fourth grade someone told you that you couldn’t find other girls pretty.” You cringe at that memory. Some boy had overheard you saying how you thought another little girl in your class was beautiful and he had told you it was gross for boys to think boys were cute and for girls to find girls cute. Unfortunately that little shit’s comments stuck with you through your whole life, impacting you heavily as a child.

“And so then you only ever came home talking about boys, but I could tell it wasn’t quite the same as how you felt toward the pretty girls. And then when you were 17 you came to me to tell me about the pretty girl you had a crush on and I was so proud of you and excited that that stupid boy didn’t change you. And then since you’ve moved out for school I got to hear snippets over the phone about dates but it’s not the same. So indulge me. Tell me about her as you would any other girl.”

“But you do know her, Mom.” Still hesitant to have this conversation about Jessie, it was easy when your Mom didn’t know the other person.

“Does she have a job? Does she have aspirations? Where’s she from?” She ignored your comment and starts firing off questions.

You let out a small giggle as you take another drink, your Mom was always one to interrogate you about girls you talked about, it was just funny the way she was pretending she didn’t know Jessie.

You fell into conversation with your Mom for a bit. She’d ask questions, pretending to be oblivious to the fact that you were talking about Jessie. You answered, the small trace of beer in your system making you care slightly less, also knowing that your Mom had had her fair share of wine.

You told her about your conversations with Jessie, ones from all the hours you two spent secluded in the training rooms. You told her about your mutual aspiration for travel, how you’d talked about school, she taught you what she learned as an engineer in school, you talked about her family, her family dogs, all the tiny details you could remember about Jessie.

The more you talked about her, the more you watched your mothers face change. Originally looking a little uncomfortable when you talked about Jessie but now she was grinning back at you.

“You actually like her don’t you?”

“Obviously.” You huff throwing your arms up.

“Well, I wasn’t sure if you just thought she was hot and you wanted to hookup with a professional athlete .”

“Mom!” You can feel your cheeks start to heat up.

You both fall into silence, your Mom finishing off her glass of wine and you staring at the ground thinking about everything you just said to your Mom.

“I forgot to say this earlier but I’m also sorry I accused you of lying to me.”

“It’s fine Mom, really don’t worry about it.”

Your Mom stands from the couch with a yawn. “Guest room made up by chance?” You nod at her. It wasn’t really a guest room, more of a den in your apartment that you had made an office with a bed in the corner.

Before she left to go to bed she moved over to you, placing her hands on your shoulders.

“Kiddo?” You cringe at the childhood nickname, looking up at her. “I’m not going to tell you to do anything with Jessie, but, you’re stubborn and I know you will. So just please, if you two decide to take your relationship anywhere, just be adults about it. Don’t let it affect work, don’t let it mess up her playing, don’t sneak around. If you want to be adults, act like it, tell the people who need to know.”

“We already talked, nothings going to happen.”

“I know you think that, but when the two of you see each other for almost 2 months straight, I think it’ll maybe be hard to keep it that way. I’d still advise you two to avoid each other as much as you can, keep it professional, that's the right choice in my eyes. But, unfortunately my more realist advice, wait until the Olympics are over when you’re no longer associated with the team and you’re back at school. You don’t want to be accused of the team’s downfall because Fleming is too busy staring off at her own trainer to make a decent pass.” With that she walks away from you, placing her glass in the sink and wandering to the den.

You knew most likely your Mom seemed to be okay with you and Jessie once you were no longer a trainer was just the wine talking and she’d go back to normal in the morning but for now you’d take it. You put your own bottle in the recycling and head into your bedroom. You consider texting back Jessie but decide against it as you plug your phone in and set an alarm for the next morning.

The next morning you wake up and make your way into the kitchen finding a note from your mom saying she left early, she loved you and she’d see you soon.

You grabbed a pan from the kitchen and opened the fridge to find eggs and started making yourself breakfast.

The sound of your phone ringing causes you to jump and let out a yelp, nearly dropping the egg you were cracking. Turning around you grab your phone, seeing Jessie’s name across the screen. You debate not answering, but maybe she needed you for work reasons, so you answer.

“Hello?”

“Should I be scared that your Mom tried to call me yesterday?”

You hadn’t expected that to be her first words. “She what?”

“Yeah, I didn’t answer, I was still trying to get home but she called me, no voicemail, no text, just a missed call. So I’m asking, is she still out for my head because of us?”

“There’s no us, but probably not? I don’t know. She showed up unexpectedly at my place last night to apologize for how she yelled at me.”

“That’s good, right?”

“I guess? I mean she’s still pretty upset, but she apologized for treating me unprofessionally. So maybe she wanted to apologize to you too, I’m not sure.”

“Oh.”

“She also asked about you.” There’s silence on the other end, you pull the phone back to check that the call hadn’t ended.

“Hello?” You stirred your eggs.

“Hi.” Jessie’s voice comes through clearly.

“Oh I thought you maybe hung up.”

“No.” There’s another pause. “What did she ask?”

“Everything I guess? She had maybe a few too many sips of wine.” You let out a small laugh. “She told me to talk to her about you as if she didn’t know you. It was something we used to do when I was a kid. I’d sit and tell her every detail about the boys or girls I liked.” You turn around to lean against the kitchen table.

“That’s sweet that she wanted to do that with you.”

“Yeah.” It’s now you leaving a long silence. “It could’ve been the wine talking but she was less mad I think, she even suggested we just wait until the Olympics are over to figure out what it is between us.”

You hear a sigh come through the phone. “I thought we agreed to be professional.”

“We did.”

“No offense but telling me that your Mom suggested we figure out something after the Olympics isn’t really professional at all, it’s only going to get in my head.” Her voice now sounding upset and frustrated.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Sorry Jessie.” You’re not sure why you’re really apologizing, all you did was tell her what she wanted to know.

“It’s fine, I gotta go.” She rushes her sentence.

With that the line went dead and you stared back at your phone you could see your reflection in the black screen. The whole conversation ran through your head again. She had seemed excited that you talked to your Mom about her, but maybe you misunderstood. Jessie’s mood had taken such a sharp negative turn at the end, when you mentioned the possibility of post Olympics.

You open your texts, and start typing.

Hey, that was weird, sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I just thought we were maybe still doing the friendly flirting given you brought up our kiss yesterday.

You erase the message. Locking your phone and turning back to see your eggs burnt, just starting to smoke.

“Shit shit shit.” You rushed over grabbing the pan and turning off the burner. Too frustrated first with Jessie’s confusing behavior and then with your ability to burn the easiest breakfast, you decide to grab a book and sit outside hoping you wouldn’t have to think about reality for a while.

The rest of your day was easy, you sat outside reading two whole books and also getting incredibly sunburnt in the process. The thought of sunscreen completely slipping your mind. You were able to not think about school, or your mom, or work, or Jessie, or the Canadian team at all.

The next three days played out the exact same, except with sunscreen this time. It was good, you genuinely got a break, from school, from work, and from life. It was great. Everything was going well, you had managed to not think about Jessie most of the day, until you went to bed and your phone notification popped up, reminding you of tomorrow’s responsibilities.

Calendar: Physio Team Meeting 8:00

Calendar: Meeting w/ J.Fleming 10:00

Calendar: Travel Paperwork Meeting 13:15

You had been excited to see her, that was until your weird shared phone call 3 days ago. It had been radio silence between the two of you since, you never texted her and she never reached out. Not that you expected her to, but it would’ve been nice to hear from her.

Your morning was quick, opting to just eat at the facilities instead of waking up early to make your own breakfast. You met your mom in the parking lot and the two of you walked into your first meeting together. It was general information for the upcoming schedule. The players were set to come back in 3 weeks for 5 days, the team would then travel to Paris to get settled before starting play later that week. It was going to be a busy 3 weeks before the team came back, everyone being given various tasks and responsibilities to oversee in the meantime. Yours as you had already been told was to keep Jessie in the loop with her teammates, as well as keeping up with her teammates themselves.

And that’s what you did at 10:00. You got onto your computer joining a call that was supposed to be you, Jessie, and Sarah, one of the other physio’s who was supposed to be the professionalism buffer. Unfortunately she had other things that took priority which left just you and Jessie.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

“Um Sarah isn’t coming, she has some other things to take care of that we’re more important than babysitting me in this meeting.” You feel your palms sweating, wiping them on your pants.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. So we can get into it here-” you start to pull up a spreadsheet with information on each of the roster’s players. You didn’t feel like doing the small talk with her right now.

“Really quick, I wanted to apologize.” You stop messing with the document on your screen and look over to where the box with Jessie’s face was. “About that phone call, I made it weird, I think I just got a little, I don’t know, maybe overwhelmed, so I’m sorry.”

“Oh it’s fine.”

“It wasn’t fine, it wasn’t okay for me to be unprofessional when I texted you earlier and then get upset with you for doing the same.”

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.” It was nice that she apologized but it still didn’t provide much of an explanation as to what happened.

The rest of your meeting goes as planned, you walk through every roster member, their current status, if they’re back playing at club yet, if so how many minutes they got in matches, all the details.

“How are you? You’re the only one we haven’t gone through.”

“I’m good.”

“I need more information than that Jessie, come on.”

“I’ve been sleeping better, obviously being in my own bed not a hotel helps, I’ve been a little stressed at Portland, things just aren’t connecting there so the playing has been stressful too. But I’ve been playing full 90’ still and the calf is treating me well.”

“Thank you, I’m glad to hear about your calf.” You can’t help but smile, thinking that your work and knowledge actually helped Jessie return to playing like herself. You type in the information she tells you into your document and then save the file and close it, bringing Jessie face to fullscreen on your computer.

“Alright, I guess we’re all done here then.”

“I actually had one more thing.”

“Oh! Sorry I should’ve check if you were done. Just let me open up my file again, hang on, sorry about that.”

“No, it’s not for the file.” There’s a pause, you just look at her on the screen. She’s looking down and you’re pretty sure playing with her hands, the way she does when she’s nervous.

“Can we please be friends? I’ve been wanting to text you about books I read, or cool travel locations I’ve seen. I wanted to text you that I saw a family of deer the other day and it reminded me of you telling me about the deer in your childhood backyard. But you told me we couldn’t even be friends, so I've been respecting that. But I want to be able to tell you those things, so if there’s any way we could be friends, it can still be professional, but friendly, I’d really like that.” Her sentence is rambling and you could tell she clearly had prepared to ask you but somewhere along the lines was just saying whatever came to her head.

What caught your attention was that she thought of the small 3 sentence story you had told her days ago about your childhood backyard. The backyard where you and your mom used to watch the deer run and graze. She remembered that tiny detail that you told her. It made your heart sing that she remembered.

“We can be friends.” You say with a smile knowing in the back of your head that there would be no way you’d be able to stay just friends with the beautiful girl who was now grinning back at you.

“Yay!” It was such a sweet response, her face lighting up. “Okay I’ll see you next week, same time?”

“Yeah Jessie, thanks, I’ll see you then.” She hangs up the call. You only have a minute in your office in silence before a series of texts come in.

Jessie Fleming: since we’re friends now

Jessie Fleming: look at the deer

Jessie Fleming: 2 Images

You look at the images, one was a photo of three deer, one being a baby, all standing in tall grass, the sun a golden yellow cascading on them. The next photo was a closer shot of the fawn. The pictures looked like someone from National Geographic took them, the detail, lighting, all of it.

You: did you take those photos?

Jessie Fleming: yes

You: wow

You: maybe I’ll have to bring you along on my future travels to be the photographer

Jessie Fleming: I definitely wouldn’t mind that

That was all it took, a simple conversation and two photos of deer to start the friendship between you and Jessie. A friendship that quickly snowballed into what was flirtatious, teasing, sweet, but overall borderline inappropriate for a working relationship. But you didn’t care, it was easy. Over those next three weeks the banter and friendship with Jessie grew and grew, the late nights texting that turned into late nights on FaceTime with the older girl, it felt harmless being that you were so far away from her.

The reality of what you two had developed only set in when it was three weeks later and you were standing in the physio room as players started filing in for the first training session before traveling to Paris.

Jessie walked in, looking around before her eyes caught yours. Her face lit up and you knew yours did too. You felt butterflies in your stomach. She gives you a smile and a quick flash of a smirk as she walks in the other direction going to say hello to the other staff first. She greets them all, you patiently wait, pretending not to be watching her as you restock bandaids in a drawer. But you were, out of the corner of your eye you couldn’t help but watch her move around the room, your heart rate picking up speed as she would move closer and closer with each person she said hello to.

“I saved the best for last.” You hear her soothing voice behind you.

You turn and she’s standing in front of you arms out as she had done to the other staff. You step toward her, wrapping your arms around her waist as she wraps around your shoulders. You wonder how she smells so good for someone who just got off an airplane and a bus ride, but somehow she does.

“I’ve missed you.” Her lips are against your ear and her voice is quiet to not allow anyone else to hear.

“I missed you too.” You whisper back to her. You pull away, catching your Mom’s eye over Jessie’s shoulder. She gives you a tight lipped smile and a small shake of her head.

“Do you need anything?” You offer Jessie, pointing to an open table where she could sit if she wanted her calf or anything else worked on. You don’t miss how at first she doesn’t verbally answer you, instead her eyes move from your face, down your entire body, then back up, her eyes taking an extra second on your lips before returning to meet your eye contact. She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, biting her lip softly.

“Nope, I’m good.” She gives you a smile, you can see her cheeks have a slight red blush but you ignore that.

She turns and walks away, Janine catching her on the way out. You watch as the two appear to argue for a second before Janine slaps the back of Jessie’s head softly. Jessie returns the favor and smacks Janine’s arm as they keep moving down the hallway. Just before they hit the corner Janine turns back to look at you, you make eye contact for a second and she raises her eyebrows at you. Not knowing what that means or what to do you just turn back to putting bandaids, tape, and gauze back where they belong.

It was going to be a long 6 weeks with the team.

[libraryofloveletters]

The Christmas Market

Pierre Gasly x Fem!Reader

Warnings: home sick reader, pierre is trying his best, christmas markets, cheesy couple stuff, pierre is kinda sweet when he's not being an ick, pierre can't skate for shit, cooties as these kids would say.

Word Count: 718

Author's Note: again, my charity of the month writing the man. y'all know I don't fuck with this man like that lmaooo - for @2-fast-2-curious cause this is her pookie

--

You were missing home quite a bit and Pierre decides to indulge in one of your favourite holiday traditions.

Home sickness was no joke and it was kicking in big time.

You lived in Milan since you had applied to go to University there. You moved during your first year and fell in love with the place and with a certain formula one driver who lived there as well.

As much as you've come to love Milan and Pierre, you always went home for the holidays. For the last three years, you were home for Christmas and in France for new years with your boyfriend, Pierre and his family.

This year was much different, your studies kept you in Milan a lot longer than expected and you would be missing out on a lot of your family traditions.

No tree decorating, no cookie decorating and no Christmas market.

Pierre being the sweet boyfriend he was, was trying his best to cheer you up as much as he could. He usually waited until a week or two before Christmas to get his Christmas tree but this year, he bought the biggest artificial tree one could find and about a million and one ornaments to see if he could improve your mood.

And for a bit, it did work. The 5 hours it took you two to put the tree together, your mood did improve but the next day, it was back to focusing on your exams and the lack of Christmas mood was apparent.

He offered to bake cookies with you but you turned down his offer; you typically baked your mom's famous and secret cookies but you didn't have the recipe, hence the secret part.

Pierre was running out of ideas but then an ad for the Christmas market popped on his Instagram.

He finds you on the couch, finally popping your laptop for the afternoon. "How about a date night?" He asks, reaching for your hand.

"Babe," you groaned, letting him pull you up. "I'm not really in the mood."

"C'mon, some fresh air will make you feel better. You've been glued to your laptop all day."

"Fine," you gave in, the two of you getting ready. Pierre didn't give you any idea as to where you're going other than to dress warm. You figured you'd probably walk to dinner or something but you weren't - he opened the car door for you, driving to some undisclosed location.

To be honest, you weren't paying much attention to him or where he was going until the car came to a full stop, Pierre turning off the engine. You finally look up from your phone to see the sign in front of you; Christmas market.

"You didn't," you turn to face your boyfriend.

The man smiles, nodding. "I know it's not the one at home but, it's still a Christmas market so I hope that counts."

"Of course it does!" You reach over to give him a kiss, your hand resting on his jaw softly.

Pierre gets out of the car and you mirror his action, the two of you holding hands as you walk into the market.

The Christmas trees planted around the place, the lights wrapped around the roof of each stand, the sound of laughter and cheesy Christmas music filled your ears, as did the smell of gingerbread. You two decided to make the rounds.

You walked through the market, taking in all of it. Pierre let you drag him to every booth, buying you whatever your heart desired, even the ridiculously overpriced hot cocoa. You took photos as you went, stopping in at the photo booth; the classic ones of you two smiling, giggling and kissing with the stamp at the bottom - Milan Christmas Market 2023.

The night wrapped up with you attempting to teach Pierre how to skate. His hands in yours as you carefully took him around the skating rink.

He falls against you, you're pinned between him - a man struggling to hold himself up- and the barricade. "Did you have a good time?" He asks and you nod, a smile on your face.

"I did. Thank you for this, baby."

Pierre leans in, almost slipping but he catches himself as he kisses you. There's a little boy skating by, doing better than Pierre you might add, who makes a face at you two kissing. "Ew!"

You and Pierre can't help your laughter.

[luveline]

taking roan to see santa and she is so excited to tell him about her new mommy and the things she wants for christmas and when she gets there she is TERRIFIED of the man 🎅

a family trip to the mall to see santa!! fem!reader 5k words

"I'm gonna tell Santa about my new mom, and my new house, and my new bed, and my new-" 

"Babe, you're supposed to ask him for things you want, not tell him about stuff you already have." 

Roan reaches out to stroke Eddie's face absent-mindedly. He loves how loving she is, and by extension, loves that he's made her this way. 

"But I didn't have a mom or a house or a bed last year." 

He snorts, fingers wrapped up in the ribbon laces on her shiny black shoes. "You actually did have a bed, and a house." 

"A real house, dad." 

"It was a real house," he argues with little heat, straightening up her socks where they've started slipping down, fingertips pressed into her soft skin. "It was a home, anyway. You know, me and Uncle Wayne lived together in his trailer for more than ten years and it was amazing." 

It had been cramped, crowded, and it had been a stuffy hell in the summer, but it was just fine. It was more than that. 

He leans back and takes in Roan again. He's dressed her in a navy blue dress with the lining of a white skirt peeking out underneath. She has a cardigan over the top to fight the cold, and he'll wrap her up in her big puffy coat for good measure as soon as he's done her hair. She looks adorable, adorable and well-kept

He feels the familiar rush of parent pride. Fuck, I'm a good dad. 

"And we had fun, didn't we? In our trailer?" he asks her, chucking under her chin. 

She grins at him, a mouthful of tiny white pearls. "Duh, dad. We had the best times ever, with Rufus and Georgia and Steve." 

He smiles himself, reminded of the stray cats that had flocked to their home and their names. Steve had been an especially dishevelled calico, and his name had been a great point of contention between the Munson's and human Steve. 

"You know, we could always go visit them," he offers, pleased at the twinkle that grows in Roan's eyes. 

"We could?" she asks, gasping. 

"Sure, babe. I bet they miss us, and it's cold. We'll make them some fried chicken when we have time, yeah? You and me'll be the talk of the cat town." 

"And Y/N," Roan says insistently. 

He strokes her cheek with his thumb. "And Y/N," he says as he stands up. "Now, little lady. Bunches or braids?" 

By the time he's weaved her hair back into one impressive braid you're finally getting home from the doctor. A completely routine check up and still he's terrified for a split second that you're gonna come in and declare a problem. You simply pose in the doorway and smile. 

"Nothing wrong with me that wasn't wrong before," you say breezily. "Hello, my loves. Did anything happen while I was gone?" 

Roan scrambles to stand on the kitchen chair and pose as you're posing. Your expression drops, as does your jaw, and you take a while to pick it back up. 

"Aw, princess, would you look at you? You look beautiful." 

She giggles as you swoop in to kiss her. You take her face into two delicate palms and stroke curly baby hairs behind her ears. A year ago, even a couple of months ago, you would've asked before you kissed her. Now, you pucker up wordlessly, and Roan bears her cheek like she can't wait. If her excited shifting from one foot to the other is anything to go by, she can't. 

"You look so, so pretty," you praise, pulling away to wipe at the splodge of lip balm you've left shining on her baby cheek. 

"You look more pretty," Roan says. 

Eddie adores you both in ways he can't articulate. 

His unspoken affection summons your attention. You let your hands fall to her shoulders and meet his eyes over her head. For a moment you smile abashedly, the awkward amazing smile you'd been wearing when you first met. It eases into something easier, something Eddie isn't ashamed to admit he loves more. This one practically oozes love. 

"Do you want to get changed?" you ask. 

He pretends like you've slapped him. "What do you mean? This isn't mall-worthy?" 

"Your work overalls and my apron?" you ask wryly. "Sure, wear that." 

He tries not to smile but he's practically sticky with it, kissing your cheek and patting Roan's back in tandem before he escapes upstairs to change. He puts on a pair of tight black slacks and a dark navy button down to match Roan, rolling the sleeves up in the way he knows you love. 

There's Christmas music and giggling downstairs when he returns. Roan's now standing on the table of all places, her hands in your hands, the two of you dancing quite aggressively considering it's Jingle Bell Rock. You start to swing her around, pulling her into your chest so you can waltz in time with the music. 

You swing to face the doorway and cheer when you see him. "Dad!" you direct Roan's attention. "That's your nicest button down. Is that the one you wore when you proposed?" 

He smiles at the memory but quickly hides it, peering down at his shirt as if it's the most boring item of clothing Walmart's ever made. "This old thing?" He lets the dramatics fall. "No, not this one. I might be wearing the same socks, though, if you wanna check?" 

You dip your face down to Roan's and rub the bridges of your noses together. "No thanks," you say, slipping into some bubbly mom talk. "He thinks I wanna look at his socks, did you hear? What a weirdo." 

"Weirdo," she echoes. 

"Wretched women," he mumbles, heading for the shoe rack. He shoves on a pair of boots and raises his volume. "Come on, sweet girls, time to go see Santa!"

"Santa!" 

Roan squirms out of your arms and onto the floor. She sprints for the front door and grabs clumsily at the handle, slightly too short to reach and pull down with any force. Eddie takes her coat down from the hanger and bunches up the sleeves to get her hands through. One arm then two, she makes it difficult work but it's something he's become an expert in. Wayne once said he reckoned Eddie could get an octopus into a straight jacket. 

"Babe, move out the way," he says. 

Roan steps back enough for him to crack the door and then bursts into the cold. She seems less enthusiastic when the ice bites at her naked knees, looking to Eddie for reassurance. 

He hands you the keys and you take them automatically. "I'm gonna get her into the car before she turns into a popsicle." 

Realisation dawns on your face. "I dont have my purse. Be right there," you say, spinning back into the house. 

He catches up to Roan where she's waiting by your car. She has a car seat in your car and his, but yours is the one at the front of the driveway. She looks tiny next to it, smaller when she starts shivering. It's a sub level Christmas in Hawkins. 

"Alright, Ro, in you go," he says, opening door. He covers the top of the doorway with his hand so she can't knock herself out and straps her in once she's situated. 

"It's cold," she says through chattering teeth. 

"I'm sorry, your wool stockings were in the wash, babe." He covers her frost-bitten cheeks, blood pinking her skin. "We might need to get you some pants at the mall, so you don't fr-fr-freeze to death," he says, imitating her shivering. 

She giggles infectiously. "You're funny." 

He presses a kiss to her head. "All legs in the ride!" he warns. 

"Don't cut her legs off," you call from the front door. 

"Never. Am I driving?" he asks, closing Roan's door. He succeeds in not mauling her. 

"Do you want to?" 

"Do you want to?" 

"Get in the car." 

"Yes, ma'am," he purrs, escaping around to the passenger side and away from your clutches. 

The drive consists of Eddie messing with your deteriorating stereo system and Roan's ecstatic babbling. She's back onto what she wants to tell Santa. New mom, new house, new bed, new princess dresses, new kitchen, new pet fish. The list goes on. Though they aren't as new as she thinks; you, Eddie and Roan have been living together now for a couple of months, and you and Eddie have been engaged for almost as long. The novelty has yet to wear off for Roan. Eddie hopes his daughter will be this amazingly happy for the rest of her life.

"You think it's gonna break?" you ask, watching the stereo with all the caution of a lion tamer. 

"God, I hope so. I'll know what to get you for Christmas, then." 

It's a bluff — Eddie's already got you a bunch of gifts, some of which you're pretending you don't know about, and some he's actually managed to hide well. 

"You won't believe what I got for-" You cough. "Uh, Lucky." 

He laughs, checking over his shoulder to see if Roan's listening. She absolutely isn't, feet wiggling along to the static riddled kiddie songs and Teddy the one eared bear in her lap. "I'm gonna tell him you need a new ear, Teddy, don't worry," she says, tone conspiring.

He winces like she's listening. "Yeah, what was it? A new plant?" 

"Yeah," you mumble. You're a bad liar. "New plant. It's pink and gold and it's made out of velvet silk," — you lower your voice to a whisper — "with handmade skirts and hand sewn sequins." 

His eyes go wide. "I thought we said no more presents for Lucky." 

"Did we say that?" 

"Well, I said that. Starting to think you weren't listening." He pinches your thigh, quick and nipping to get you squealing.

"I listened," you insist through laughter, facing him with a bright, bright smile. You keep your eyes on the road. "I just didn't comply." 

"I'm not above force." 

You gasp, delighted. "You dog! My little girl's in the car." 

"My little girl isn't listening." 

"Yes I am." 

You snort so loud it probably hurts your throat. 

Eddie whips his head to Roan and her cheeky smile. "I know what we should- what we should get Lucky for Christmas," she says knowingly. 

"What's that, princess?" you ask, watching her through the rearview. Each word drips with love.

"A girlfriend," she says. 

"Yeah? We'd need to get him a bigger tank, too-" 

"So that's not happening," Eddie says. 

He hates being the voice of reason, on record despises it, but you love Roan so much, you're fucking whipped, you'd pull Mount Fuji from the Earth and put it behind Bradley's if she asked you to, so while he loves nonsense and participating in it, he has to say no. You can't afford a new fish tank now you've paid for the honeymoon vacation and the wedding venue deposit and Christmas. 

Or rather, Eddie can't afford it. He works on principle. Your money is your money. His money is your money. You argue that your money is a hundred percent his money too and he fights you on it all the time, even though you're technically the breadwinner. He's not too proud to let you pay more rent, more toward groceries, more everything. Now. It had been a little bit of a sore spot at first. 

He'd reasoned that he should be paying more in reality because of Roan and you'd glared at him half-seriously and said, Don't insult me, handsome. You know I love her. 

You more than love her, and if you want to spend every last penny of your paycheck on Christmas this month he won't fight you on it. 

Besides that, he can't take any extra hours because he has to pick up Roan. You love that argument because it supports your conclusion, among others — Eddie does the majority of the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning. But, those arguments should be moot. You definitely carry your weight, plus, he loves to do stuff for you. Should be, but you do that stupid fucking thing that you do wherein your hands are all over his face and your voice is soft as silk in his ear, and you kiss under his jaw and win any and every argument in a pathetically small amount of time. He'd die for you. You're a cheater. 

"Spoilsport," you mumble, pulling into the parking lot outside the mall with a bumpy turn. 

"Lucky needs a girlfriend fish, dad, or he'll get so lonely he'll die." 

Eddie blows hair out of his face and zips up his jacket, opening your door with a mostly respectful kick. He rushes to get Roan out before you can, knowing you'll carry her all the way inside and give yourself achey shoulders. 

"Why do you say that?" Eddie asks as he opens her door. Roan looks up all smiles, Teddy clutched to her neck. "Why do you think he'll die? Lonely people don't die, babe." 

"Are you sure?" 

He unclips her straps and pulls her out deftly. He'd let her walk herself but the cold is biting and he can carry her much quicker. "I'm positive." 

Her face crinkles up. He likely shouldn't have mentioned death, she's too small, but Roan has a strange understanding of all things macabre. Santa's more real to her than death, for sure. 

"Maybe I can ast Santa for a big tank for Lucky and then he can have a girlfriend and a baby." 

The dropped 'k' on ask makes Eddie stupidly emotional. A habit she's falling out of from when she was younger. 

You start pushing him behind the shoulders. "Let's go," you whine, "before we all get hypothermia." 

He makes sure there's room in the crook of his arm for your hand while making his way toward the mall sliding doors. You fall into step beside him. 

Eddie begins stranger prep. 

"You gotta be polite to Santa, remember? Because he sees all these little girls and boys and he's tired from the Christmas rush, and he's taking the time to come see you." 

Roan nods seriously. "My pleases and thank you, dad, I always remember," she says. 

"Yes, you do," you praise, though she does not.

"Do you think he can get Lucky a girlfriend?" Roan asks you. 

More terrible smiles. "Yes, he definitely can. What kind of girlfriend? A goldfish, too? They have black goldfish in the Petsmart with big heads like raspberries- oh, we should go see them after we talk to Santa!" 

Roan's nodding grows more and more voracious. "Can we, dad?" she asks. 

"Why're you askin' me? Y/N already said you could." 

You almost trip over yourself trying to kiss his cheek. He knows you love him. He suspects you love being a parent more. He's rubbed your back through enough 'I'm so lucky' breakdowns to know you're genuinely in love with his little girl. 

Inside the warmth of the mall entryway, Eddie sets Roan on her feet. She holds both hands up. He takes one, you take the other, and she rambles about Lucky's potential lover as you both lead her to the entrance of the food court where the mall Santa's grotto has been set up this year. 

The walls and railings are decorated in spiraling lights and tinsel, store windows teeming with festive merchandise. Kids are everywhere, none as pretty or well-dressed as Roan (in Eddie's totally unbiased opinion), but all looking startled by the intensity of everything. Roan herself baulks. 

"It's bright, huh?" Eddie asks her knowingly. 

"All the lights," she says. 

"Yeah, babe, a lot of lights. There's a really big Christmas tree further in, too, we came here last year to see it." 

She shrugs. Eddie's unsure, but he thinks maybe she's drifted a little closer to his legs. 

The grotto comes into view and she perks up. "Oh," she says sweetly, breathless with her eyes wide, dark eyes shining in the fairy lights. 

"There he is," Eddie encourages, "and some elves, too. We line up, uh-" 

"Over there," you say, tugging him and Roan with you like the three of you are a slinky. 

Roan bounces on her tiptoes from the end of the line to the very beginning. You and Eddie can't stop sharing secret smiles. He loves doing this every year, and last year he'd done most of it alone. Wayne hates shopping malls and you hadn't been dating quite long enough for him to feel comfortable asking you to do parent stuff at the time. The difference a year can make — it aches in the best way. 

"After Santa and the pet store, what's our plan? D'you wanna get pizza? Or something else, we could go to Enzo's?" he asks. 

"Enzo's?" 

"I'll pay."

"Last time you had a weird stomach for three whole days after. I thought we'd never see you again." 

"You love it, though. I'll buy some tums. Take a cushion into the bathroom." 

"Ew, no," you say, sounding less disgusted than you could be. 

You're both keeping an eye on the line. There's only one kid in front of you now, and Roan is pulling on your arms ready to pounce. 

"Chinese?" 

"What does macaroanie want?" 

"She gets everything she wants all the time. Would it kill you to choose?" 

You think it over. "Definitely. Why don't you choose?" 

"'Cause I want you to, that's the whole point. You know, it's okay to do things that you want to do." 

"I want to make you pick. You can pay, too, if we're going to the pet store. Santa needs a donation, and I'm gonna be strapped for cash." 

He mirrors your sweet smile. "Deal." 

"Next, please," says a very average sized elf. 

You and Eddie steal another look and you drop Roan's little hand to let Eddie walk her up to Santa. She'd loved him last year, asking for a bunch of things Eddie hadn't been able to deliver on. He'd tried his best, had done a bunch of freelance guitar repairs that he wasn't educated for (but isn't half bad at), had scraped and scrimped, he'd even borrowed money from Wayne that Wayne refused to take back the following February when Eddie finally made it up, and he still hadn't been able to get 'princess sheets' or the new Dotty Dolly. 

They approach Santa. Roan takes one step, then the other. Santa says hello. 

Roan pauses. 

"C'mere, hon," Santa says, an older gentleman with a natural white beard. He's a very convincing Santa, all things considered. "Tell old Chris Kringle what you want for Christmas." 

Eddie pushes her forward very gently with his fingertips. "Go on, babe, it's okay. You wanted to tell him about your mom and the house and Lucky the fish, right?" 

Roan takes the last step. Then, frozen in the face, she backs up, nearly trips, and bolts down into Eddie's legs. She practically flies down the stairs with a freaked out moan. 

His eyes blow. He looks at Roan, looks at Santa. "I'm sorry," Eddie says, smiling at the old man awkwardly. 

The elves do not look happy. 

Eddie bends down. "Roanie," he says urgently, "what's the matter? You don't wanna talk to Santa?" 

She says nothing, only clings. Eddie tries to steer her shoulder back to Santa on his big velvet chair and she's having none of it, whining and shoving her head into his thigh. 

"Excuse me-" starts the elf. 

"Roan, are you sure you don't wanna talk to him? He's Santa, he wants to hear all about your list this year," Eddie tries. 

"No." 

He sighs, perturbed but not too worried. They can always try again. He says sorry to the elves and to Santa who waves his hand, as if to say it doesn't matter. He gets his hands under Roan's arms and carries her to where you're standing on the other side. You look heartbroken. 

"What happened?" you ask softly, stroking a sweet curl behind her ear. 

Eddie has no answers and Roan doesn't want to give them, so you make your way to the food court in a shocked silence. Roan has a tendency to deal with negatives in two ways — tantrums for the superficial, withdrawal for the serious. Eddie still isn't good at dealing with the latter. Together, you can usually save the day. 

"Roan, bug," Eddie says, so only she can hear, "tell me what happened. You didn't like Santa, huh?" 

"Dad," she says, almost inaudible. 

He slides a hand behind her neck and tips her away from his chest. "What?" 

"He didn't look how I remembered." 

"'Cause you're older," he says. 

He's employed his nicest, smoothest dad voice. The gentle one for all her scariest moments, like shots at the doctor's office and the time she wet herself in the playground in front of the other kids. Anything to assuage her embarrassment, a safety blanket. 

He slides into a booth and you hover. 

"Would something yummy make it feel better?" you ask hopefully. 

Roan shakes her head into Eddie's neck. 

"I-" You look super crushed. Everything had been going well. He knows how badly you want Christmas to be perfect. 

"How about," Eddie cuts you off, not unkindly, "you and me and mom get warm donut holes and ice cream to dip them in? We've never had then with her, have we?" 

It's a good Christmas tradition. 

Roan can't resist. "Okay," she says. 

"I'll get them," you volunteer. "I got it." 

Something hooks you as you're trying to leave and you double back to kiss the top of her head and Eddie's temple in quick succession. He smiles at you genuinely, happy when your frown livens up. Roan will be okay in a little while, no doubt. No need for you to tear yourself up over it. 

Alone, Eddie eases Roan off of his lap and onto the bench beside him. He takes her little hands into his. She looks nearly angry, dark eyebrows pinched up and her eyes welled with tears. 

"It's okay that you didn't like Santa," he murmurs.

"I wanted to tell him about Y/N," she says, lower lip trembling. 

"We can always go and see him again." 

She stiffens. 

"Or we can try a different day, yeah? C'mon, where's my brave girl gone?"

"He smiled funny…" she mumbles.

He feels awful instantly. He doesn't need Roan to be brave if she can't be. 

"Well, if you want," he says, inclining his head, "you could tell me what you want for Christmas, I could tell Santa." 

She looks up. "You'll tell Santa?" 

"Oh, yeah," he says quickly. "I tell Santa all the stuff you forget. How'd you think you got your space hopper last year? And your princess slippers? I tell him all the things you want." 

"He still didn't get me Dotty Dolly." 

"He's old, babe. He's all senile, like Wayne." Sorry Wayne. 

Her face flops into his upper arm, chubby cheek squished to the mild curve of his bicep. She lets out a morose sigh. "Sorry, dad." 

He nudges her gently. "For what?" 

"Being not brave." 

He presses his forehead to her hair. "I didn't mean that. You don't have to be brave meeting new people. It's scary, even if you met them before. Like Y/N," he says, nuzzling Roan's silky hair affectionately, "I don't know if you remember, you were always excited to see her, and I used to think I was excited too. Then we'd get to Morgan's cake shop and I'd make us late because I was hiding in the car. She used to make me nervous, and now she's your mommy." 

He wraps his arm around her shoulders. "Sometimes we need time to get to know people before we're ready to talk to them. It's okay that you got scared, babybug, promise." 

She goes limp. Her cheek slides down the length of his stomach and lands on his thigh. "I really wanted Lucky to have a girlfriend." 

He pets her hair, accomplished in his dad duties. (He hopes. Tonight he'll go over this conversation with you and wonder if he should've said something else.) 

"Lucky can definitely still have a girlfriend. What did I just say? I'll make sure Santa knows exactly what you want, no sweat." 

She huffs another huge sigh that must take up her entire lung capacity. He tickles the back of her neck with the end of her braid slowly, drawing circles around her ear and her earlobe until her shoulders are heaving. 

"You're laughing," he accuses. 

"No I'm not," she says into his leg. 

"No?" He lets her hair go in favour of scratching her neck. "We can change that." 

You return with way too much ice cream and twice as many donuts to find her squealing and cornered in the booth, curled up into a ball like a pill bug to evade Eddie's cruel hands. 

"What are you doing to her?" you demand. 

"I'm cuddling her. What's it look like to you, mister?" 

"Mister? You sick freak." 

"You're the sick freak, freak. Sit down and give my girl one of those donut holes before she keels over." 

"She's already keeled! Get offa her, the ice cream's melting on my hands." 

He stops tickling Roan and she finds the strength to sit. You're ecstatic to see her happy again and you show it with a grand proferring of sweet treats and three plastic spoons. You've bought a whole lotta donuts and an ice cream boat with chocolate fudge and cherries, and you let her maul it without complaint. It's a good time, a great one, to watch Roan teach you how to dip the still-warm donuts in your ice cream, and to watch the two of you try to eat them without getting powdered sugar and chocolate all over your fancy clothes. 

He ties the cherry stem with his tongue and mystifies Roan, who spends the next ten minutes trying to do the same. He feels so sorry for her that when she sticks her little tongue out with an untied stem for the tenth time, he meets your eyes and nods and the two of you cheer like crazy. 

He hadn't brought his bag, a rookie mistake, so he nabs some napkins from the condiments table and gives Roan the good old spit and polish. 

Clean-ish, he takes her hand and she stands on the bench, hopping off and landing with Munson grace (her knees give out). You take the long way around the grotto so she won't have to see Santa again and come across the mall's huge Christmas tree. 

"Woah," she gasps, enthralled. 

Eddie really should've brought the camera, even if he only has two pieces of film left. He wants to remember this forever, her face still soft with baby fat reflected back from a giant golden bauble, tinsel bouncing light all over her skin like a mirrorball. You bend down beside her and grin. 

"Eddie, look at it from down here." 

He suspends his disbelief and kneels down. 

From the floor, the tree looks bigger than any skyscraper, and it shines like a star. If you follow the tree all the way to its angel at the top, you can look past it into the skylight, where the dark night shines with pinprick stars. 

"Our Christmas tree doesn't look this good," you say. 

"Yes it does!" Roan says, turning to you with a stern scowl. "Our Christmas tree is the best one they ever made." 

"Yeah?" 

"Mm. And I got to put the star on." 

"Yeah, you did." You rest your hands on her shoulders and the two of you look up together. 

I need a fucking camera, Eddie thinks hotly. 

— 

Petsmart is like an aquarium at 6PM. The lights have been lowered, the fish tanks glowing bright blue and bubbling in the dim light. A hundred white and red babies swim erratically, their fins a blur in the top tank. Underneath, there are tanks filled with algae-eating snails that move surprisingly quickly. To the left, the big black goldfish with puffy cheeks lavish in their more spacious tank. 

"Where's the ones with the raspberry head?" Roan whispers. 

Your eyes follow a beautiful red goldfish the size of three fingers. "I don't know, little lady," you mumble, entranced by the goldfish's graceful arc. 

"Do you think Lucky would have a crush on him?" 

You look to where she's pointing at, little finger chasing a telescope fish. 

"I think he'd love him. He's a big one." 

"I thought Lucky wanted a girlfriend?" Eddie asks. 

"But all these ones are boys, dad." 

He frowns, endearingly confused. "How can you tell?" 

"I just know." 

You love the way she says it, love every little word she says. She sounds confident in her declaration but the way she pronounces her words harbours the clumsiness that comes with being a young kid, 'know' carrying a lot of weight, of humour, like she can't believe Eddie would say something that silly. 

"What about that one? She looks kinda girly, no?" 

The three of you watch the fish in question complete a small loopty-loop. 

"Nah," you say, "that's definitely a boy. He has abs." 

"They're called gills." 

"Do they have any pink fish?" Roan asks. 

"Maybe not. They have pink plants. Hey, I saw the ornaments on the way in, they have a castle. Think Lucky would like that?" 

If Petsmart didn't close at 6.30 you could stay and watch the fish tanks with them forever. You hop along to the ornaments and try to catalogue all the ones Roan expresses an interest in. Buying them won't count as spoiling her, it'll be spoiling Lucky. Eddie can't possibly be irked over that. 

"Don't even think about it," he mouths. 

You remember Roan's unhappy face when she was confronted with the horror of the mall Santa up close and decide she can't leave empty handed. 

"Why don't we get him something now? You can put it in his tank tonight before bed." 

"Really?" Roan asks. 

"Go crazy." 

Roan hesitates, spoiled for choice, hands feeling over the ornaments one at a time. Eddie tells her she can't pick anything from the tip shelf and you're glad for it, because it is Christmas coming and they're extortionate hand crafted things you cannot afford. 

"This one," she says. 

She picks up a heavy looking Christmas tree glued to a white plate, multi-coloured presents nestled at the trunk. It's a glorious twelve dollars. 

You let Roan carry the bag out of the Petsmart. She turns to Eddie and says, "Please make sure Santa gets Lucky a girlfriend like the one with the big eyes. And please tell him that I have the best new mommy and the bed and the new house, please." 

He beams at her. "We can strike those off the list, for sure. What do you want now you got all the stuff you asked for last year?" 

"Pink hair." 

Eddie whistles through his teeth appreciatively. "Gnarly." 

"And a bounce house," she adds. 

He shakes his head at you before you can ask.

[apocalypseornaw]

Wanna be Yours (Pt 1/5)

Sam Winchester x Reader

After years of hunting with Dean you finally meet his younger brother

@lacilou s genius idea

Every hunter had one thing in common, tragic backstory. The one event that fucked their lives up bad enough that they not only discovered that the things that went bump in the night were very real but they decided to not sit on the sidelines and to actually do something about it.

Your event? You'd gone camping with your family, your parents along with your aunt and uncle and a couple cousins. No one had heard anything about the so called animal attacks neither did anyone know how the hell to defend themselves when the wendigo attacked.

The initial bloodbath had been hell. Your dad and uncle were first gone, going at the beast straight in an attempt to save their families. Next came your mom and aunt, a last ditch effort to distract it while you and your cousins ran. The three of you barely made it half a mile before the beast caught you.

--------------

You'd assumed that was it, you'd die just like your family had. The beast had kept the three of you for days in a cavern. You'd seen it kill your older cousin, Derek was fourteen and had fought like hell so you begged it to spare to your younger cousin, Allie his little sister who was only four not knowing if it even understood you.

The begging seemed to lure it to you. It raised its clawed hand and you prepared for a slash that never came. Instead you heard someone yell "KIDS GET DOWN!"

--------------

You nodded to Allie and you both tucked down in as small of a ball as possible. The heat that filled the cavern was unbearable mixed with the scent of burning flesh along with the sounds of the creature as it died.

When it was over you untucked and was met with a woman, she was probably around your aunts age. Her brown hair braided back, wearing jeans and a red flannel of all things. A flamethrower was in her hands "You girls ok?" You nodded numbly "Help Allie first"

That was how you met Hayley Lynols. She was a second generation hunter. When it was discovered you had no legal guardian (Allie had gone to a relative of her dad's) Hayley had stepped in to offer you a place to stay.

She'd given you three options. One was a normal life, one was the life of a hunter and the third option was what she wanted you to take "I'll train you just like my dad trained me but you go to school and get a ged at least. Any kid of mine isn't going to be dumb in any way. If you want to hunt on your own some after you're eighteen that's you but just know I'll always be here to help"

You'd taken the third option. You'd buckled down on school and studied hard. You'd gotten a ged by the time you turned fifteen and started hunting with Hayley.

That was how you met Dean. You were nineteen, on the very first solo hunt Hayley had allowed you. She deemed it simple enough, a haunting case that seemed like it'd be a simple salt and burn.

---------------

She hadn't realized another hunter was already on the case. You stood across from the guy that had to be around your age, both of you carrying a duffle and a shovel.

Neither of you blinked so you decided to go out on a limb "Anthony Rowen?" He sort of laughed "You a hunter?" You nodded then motioned towards the grave that was about three feet from where the two of you stood "I say we work this together and it goes a lot faster" he nodded "I like that idea" then offered his hand "Dean" you shook his hand "Y/N, let's get to it"

---------------

Since the two of you weren't old enough for a bar you ended up at a diner, coffee and pie in front of you both as you talked about your lives. He told you about his father and brother and you told him about Hayley. Before you went your separate way you exchanged numbers and swore to keep in touch.

You'd see Dean off and on but when you were about twenty six he fell off the map for a while until he resurfaced about a year later with a simple phone call of "Y/N, I need some help"

------------

You pulled your challenger to a stop next to Dean's impala and grabbed your phone to check the text as to what room he was in but before you could the door to room one fifteen opened and Dean walked out, shadowed by another guy. He looked a little younger than Dean with hair that borderlined shaggy but it was clear they were related. Could that be Sam?

You climbed out your car with a smile "Winchester!" Dean grinned and met you halfway pulling you into a hug "Y/N! It's good to see you" when the two of you separated he motioned to the other guy "This is my little brother Sam"

You turned your eyes towards Sam with a smile and offered your hand "I've heard about you for years, weird we're just now meeting but good to meet you" he grinned as he shook your hand "Good to meet you too" you had to admit, he was cute. Broad smile and dimples along with green hazel eyes that followed your every movement. You cut your eyes at Dean "Also, little brother? He's taller than you"

Sam laughed at your words, the sound was enough to pull a smile to your face "Oh I like her already" you winked at him "Stick around cutie, I'm a very likeable person" Dean shook his head "Let's get to work"

After that day you and the Winchesters started keeping in touch every few days. You hadn't known they lost John so you weren't able to be there for them but when you lost Hayley they'd driven straight across two states to get to your side.

--------‐--

You stood between them both, staring at the flames as they engulfed her body. You felt a shiver run through you and weren't sure if it was from the cold night air or losing the only parental figure you had left. "I'll go grab your jacket" Dean offered and headed for your challenger.

You and Sam stood silent for a few moments before he said "When dad died Dean wouldn't talk to anyone, let anyone in until he finally broke one day. Y/N I know we're not as close as you and Dean but you're my friend and if you need anything I'm here" you nodded, eyes never leaving the flames "Thanks Sam"

About that time Dean walked back over with your jacket and draped it over your shoulders "You know Y/N, I was thinking" you cut your eyes at Sam with a weak smile "Should we run?" A small smile slipped onto his face "Let's hear him out then we'll see if we need to"

"Ha ha very funny" Dean replied before continuing "Hayley always said she didn't like you hunting alone, you can always throw your hat in with me and Sam. We don't mind the company" you nodded "Maybe I will" a silence fell back over the three of you as the flames began to burn down to just embers.

@nelachu2423

@lacilou

[obsessedelusional]

religious trauma but make it gay

masterlist

paring ✦ Bella Ramsey x fem!Reader

summary ✦ Bella was your childhood best friend. The one person you felt like you could tell anything. So you do exactly that, coming out to them when you two were still young. Only for Bella to push you away. What happens when they show up at your work several years later?

word count ✦ 3,500ish

authors note ✦ I’m so in love with Bella Ramsey and there’s barely nothing out there. So I took it upon myself lmao hope y’all enjoy!!! Also I’ve never written for a real person so I hope this ok request for Bella open bc I’m a simp rn

COMMENTS AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!!

⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹

several years ago

“I think I’m gay.” You admit to your childhood best friend, Bella. The two of you sat in the school yard, parked under a tree.

“What?” She asks, forcing you to repeat the statement you’ve been trying to find the courage to say for months now.

“I think I like girls.” You further explain.

“That’s a sin. You can’t like girls.” Bella spits, bringing tears to you eyes.

“Bella-“ You say their name, letting the tears fall as they interrupt you.

“It’s a sickness, you can get help. My pastor will know exactly what to do.” She says, entirely seriously. Taking your hands in theirs, you quickly push them way. You can’t believe what your hearing.

“I don’t need help. I needed my friend to be there for me.” You stand up from the floor, overwhelmed by the entire situation.

“I don’t think-“ Bella hesitates.

“I don’t think we can be friends anymore.” Her words tremble like their unsure as they come out.

“I knew you were religious but this takes it to a whole another level.” You croak before leaving Bella sat alone under that tree. Part of you thought they’d come back, apologize to you after some time passed. That never happened, ten years of friendship over because of you opened your mouth about your sexuality. At the time you regretted saying anything at all, wishing you had just kept it bottled up inside.

The worst part was when their mother called a couple weeks after the incident basically outing you, offering your mother her pastors number. To your surprise your mom politely declined, she accepted you fully for who you were. It was a bit awkward at first at home but eventually everything went back to normal. That summer you attended your first Pride Parade and felt so seen that the coming school year you came out publicly. Considering the two of you were in the same grade you still saw them around, although never speaking to them again.

After a few years Bella landed her first huge roll in Game of Thrones, leaving your guys hometown behind. You didn’t have to see her face around anymore. Part of you happy for them but sad you couldn’t be in their life to support them. Only to remember they never supported you when you need them most.

present day

It had been several years since you came out, now living your most authentic life. Since then you had a few relationships, nothing too serious. Normally only lasting a few months before breaking up. You had graduated high school, started college shortly after. You got into the college you’d been dreaming of and the major you always imagined yourself as. Your college was a few hours from your home town so you occasionally saw people from there at your part time job. A couple days a week you were a barista at this cute little coffee shop right on the corner of the busiest street.

“What can I get you?” You ask blindly, going through the motions of a transaction.

“Y/N?” The voice on the other side of the counter asks, causing you to look up from the cash register. Looking up you’re greeted by the girl who you hadn’t seen since that depressing day. The day you lost your best friend.

“I can’t believe you work here.” They say, their voice warm.

“Yup.” You say flatly.

“What can I get you?” You ask, trying to quicken this interaction.

“The film I’m working on is filming just down the street for the next few weeks. I’ve been trying to find you for years, you have like no social media.” They admit, completely disregarding your attempt to not make small talk.

“Can I get you something?” You asks again, uninterested in what they have to say.

“Damn I deserve that.” They sigh before muttering off their order and paying. He walks over to the pick up area and you start making their drink. Every time you look up from your work they’re already staring. You can’t help but look too, they’ve changed so much. You’ve seen things about them online and people from your home town loved to talk about the girl who made it big. Always asking, “Didn’t you used to be friends with Bella?”

Once you’re done with their drink, you walk over to where they stand and set their drink down on the counter.

“Y/N wait.” They plead before you can turn your back to them. Against your better judgment you stop, briefly making eye contact. Saying nothing but signaling with your eyes to speak.

“I’m so sorry. I know what I did was shitty. I haven’t stopped thinking about that day since. While I’m still in town I’d like to apologize better like take you out or something so we can talk.” They explain, almost rambling their words.

“I understand if you don’t want to but here’s my phone number. Consider giving me a call or a text or anything, please.” They smile reassuringly pleading with you one last time, passing you a small folded up paper. They leave the coffee shop, drink in hand. You catch your self watching them leave, mind wandering on what you’re gonna do with their number.

Part of you wants to throw it away. An even bigger part of you wants to find out what would happened if you contacted Bella. Maybe their viewpoints have changed, it’s the least you can hope for. Against your better judgement you slip the small piece of paper in your phone case, deciding you’ll worry about it later. The rest of the work day is slow, painfully slow. Nothing to keep your mind distracted from thinking about Bella.

—

“I should be good, if you’re ready to take off.” Your coworker speaks, disrupting your spiraling thoughts.

“Okay,” is all you can say before rushing to clock out. Grabbing your belongings and thanking your coworker before leaving.

Once home you reach for the folded up piece of paper that’s been living in your phone case all day. You hesitate for a few moments before finally mustering up the courage to open it. All that is reads is their phone number, nothing else. You’re not sure how long your sat there staring at the piece of paper but eventually you decide to just shoot them a text.

you: hey it’s y/n

You don’t hear anything back that night. You stay up later then normal stressing about the entire situation. Imagining that it was all some elaborate set up, Bella’s sat up laughing at how stupid you could be to think that they’d want apologize.

The next morning arrives, your alarm goes off bright and early. You have a long day of classes ahead of you. You rush getting ready, picking out the most basic clothes you own. Not it the mood to try, exhausted from the lack of sleep from Bella’s sudden return to your life.

“Girl you good?” A girl you had always been friendly towards in your nine am class asks. You can never remember her name.

“It’s it that obvious?” You let out an exasperated laugh.

“No offense. Your just usually all dolled up and suddenly you look not dolled up. You just look tired.” She laughs.

“Dolled up?” You ask, curiously. For the first time truly noticing the girl who’s always sat near you.

“Yeah you always got them eye lashes and stuff. Not that you don’t look cute today, you always look cute.” They explain poorly. You can’t help but laugh at their way to describe makeup.

“Too tired this morning. Thanks I think?” You smile, she smiles back before the professor walks in and starts class. For a brief moment you forget about the lack of response from Bella. Too busy thinking about the attractive person who low-key just flirted with you. Only for that to be quickly forgotten when your phone vibrates from your pocket. You slyly pull it out laying it flat on your desk, where the professor can’t see. It is Bella, you catch yourself smiling at her name popping up. Stopping yourself immediately from having that type of reaction.

Bella: hey sorry I didn’t respond sooner super late work day only to wake up even earlier to work some more but I have tomorrow off so can we please get together

You decide you’ll respond but make them wait, not nearly as long as you waited. But you’ll stick it to them, make them wait till your out of class. The rest of the period is spent mentally drafting your response. Are you really after all these years ready to meet up with Bella? Maybe.

When class is over you shove all your belongings your bag, rushing to leave so you can send your text. Only to be stopped by that girl from before.

“What class do you have next?” She asks.

“Uhm,” You have to think about it for a moment too distracted by the phone burning a hole in your pocket.

“English in Butcher Hall at one.” You blurt out once you can remember. Normally you either go back to your dorm, grab lunch or study in the library. Today you had planned on going back to your dorm, knowing you weren’t going to be capable of studying.

“Dope. You wanna get lunch or something? I don’t have class till 1 too.” They explain, a smile on their face.

“Oof,” You say aloud, regrettably. The laugh almost as if they’re confused.

“I totally would but I got stuff I have to do before my next class.” You explain, sort of lying. Unsure why your lying just so you can hurriedly respond to Bella.

“That’s fine. Another time maybe?” She asks.

“Yeah.” You smile before walking off, back to your dorm room. They wave goodbye as you leave. When your out of their reach, you pull your phone out and type your message.

you: tomorrow works, I have one class in the morning. I’ll be done around noon. After that is ok

bella: sounds good wanna grab lunch at one?

you: yeah

Bella responds in a short time, sending you the address of a restaurant you never heard of before. You decide not respond anymore, deciding that any talking that needs to be done can be done tomorrow.

—

You had woken up early enough to actually get ready today. Or “dolled up” as the girl from your class would say. Thankfully you didn’t have that class with her today, knowing you couldn’t handle that along with all that is already going on.

After class, you walk quickly back to you dorm. Using the hour you have to dress cuter, fixing up your makeup. Mentally preparing yourself for the conversation that is about to be had. You pull up the address Bella gave you and it’s a cute little Italian restaurant. That’s always been your favorite, for long as you can remember. You wonder for a moment if they remember or if it’s just a coincidence. The drive is short, too nervous to listen to music. Letting your inner dialogue fill the silence. You park near the front door, looking down at the clock on your dash and you have a few minutes to spear. You phone goes off and it’s Bella.

bella: I’m here just let the hostess know your here to see me

All of a sudden it all starts to feel real. Your going to be having lunch with Bella after several years of no contact after coming out to them. It’s not too late to back out, you think for a moment. You have too though, you’ve made it this far. It’s a quick walk from your car to the door, you let yourself in. Greeted by a girl at the hostess desk.

“Hello!” The hostess beams.

“Hi I’m here to meet with Bella.” You explain.

“Right this way,” She smiles grabbing a menu and leading you towards the back of the restaurant where it’s more secluded. Pass the view of the back of the hostess head you can see Bella sat, scrolling through their phone. The sight of them biting their nails, puts some of your worries at ease. Knowing that they’re just as nervous makes this a little easier. Bella looks up from their phone, smiling brightly at you when they notice you.

“You still like Italian?” They ask.

“Yeah I do.” You smile because they remembered.

“I’m so glad you actually showed up.” Bella says examining you.

“After what I did I always thought you’d want nothing to do with me forever.” They explain, you quickly notice them fiddling with the table cloth.

“I’m so sorry.” They say now with a bit of sadness to their voice. Your not entirely ready to forget what happened but the sight of them is tempting you to forgive them on the spot.

“You know you haven’t grown much?” You tease as an attempt to lighten the situation.

“What?” They ask confused.

“You’ve always been so short and that hasn’t changed. You’ve cut all your hair off, I like it.” You let out an awkward laugh.

“We’ll when everyone is old and looks old I’ll still look young.” They laugh, you can tell they’re finally beginning to relax.

“Plus in my line of work it’s a plus. I can continue to play younger roles as I age.” They explain. Which leads to you asking them what they’re in town filming for. The conversation begins to flow smoothly, smiles never leaving either of your faces. You two order and wait for the food to come over. When the conversation eventually lulls, Bella’s face is screaming like she has something she wants to say but can’t get it out. You eyes dart to their fingers that anxiously fidget with the utensils in from of them.

“It’s okay,” You reassure them resting your hand on theirs. You feel them relax under your touch.

“I’m gay.” They spit out.

“Really?” You ask.

“Which is why I reacted the way I did when you told me. I’ve always had feelings for… women. I was raised to believe that it was wrong. I struggled internalized homophobia for years only recently coming to terms with my sexuality. I was so scared at the time.” Bella admits, your hand still rests on theirs. They look to you like they’re waiting for a response.

“I forgive you.” You respond.

“I would of done this sooner. Your just not the easiest person to find.”

“It’s fine Bella. Just promise we’ll stay in touch now, okay?”

“I promise.”

—

They did exactly that. For the rest of their time in town, when ever your schedules aligned you two we’re together. Or they would find any excuse to leave set and stop by for a quick visit when you were working. Getting to know each other all over again, you couldn’t help it forming a crush on them. They made you so happy, the most comfortable you felt around someone in forever. You finally got your Bella back.

Only for her to have to leave you after a few weeks. Her film was moving locations so they’d be several hours away. It was only for a month but you were so torn up about it. They had promised as soon as that month was over, they’d be back in your home town and visiting you as much as possible.

It was a bit awkward when that girl form your class kept making the moves on you. One day your finally let them down gently. It was entirely because of the slight chance with Bella you thought you might have.

You finally got your Bella back only to have separate again. This time though, you were friends. That month was spent on face time calls when ever you got the chance. Always waking up to good morning texts and not going to sleep until you two had a chance to talk on the phone. You can’t remember the last time you had smiled so much. Always checking you phone, biggest smile on your lips. All because of Bella.

—

one month later

“I missed you.” Bella says, wrapping you in a hug. Their head resting in your shoulder, breathing in your aroma.

“I missed you, more.” You tease. You feel them laugh in your embrace before pulling away.

“I may have got me an air bnb for a week or so.”

“Really? I thought this was just a weekend kind of thing.” You say, biting your lip trying your best not to smile too hard. Originally you couldn’t help but be upset when Bella flight was delayed, their 10 am arrival turned into 5 pm. You had thought half your time with them was wasted.

“We’ll you were wrong.”

“I’m glad.” You laugh, following them to your car. Helping them load their luggage. Bella pulls up her maps app and types in the location of the air bnb. You drive, listening to Bella talk about everything that had happened in the last month of filming.

“You’re so cute when you talk about your job.” You respond, letting the word cute slip out.

“What do you mean?” They ask.

“You’re cute. Do I really need to elaborate?”

“I guess not.” They smile. The rest of the car ride is filled with a comfortable silence.

Eventually you two arrive at their temporary home for the week or so. You help Bella unload and follow them to the door, watching as they unlock the lock box that has the house key inside. They open the door for you, you walk inside.

“Wow this place is so nice.” You awe at the beauty of the living room.

“You think this is nice? Come look at the back yard.” Bella leads you to the back yard, it’s so beautiful. Plants everywhere and jacuzzi, wishing suddenly you had brought a swim suit.

“Wow.” You say aloud, noticing the large hanging chair. Big enough for multiple people. It hangs over the deck, with the perfect view of the nature behind the house. Without hesitation you climb into the hanging chair, Bella watches you amused. You let out a screech when it move from your weight. Eventually you fall on your back, looking up at the stars. Bella continues to watch you, enjoying the view of you enjoying yourself.

“Are you not going to join me?” You speak up.

“I guess so.” You laugh at their attempt to climb up, their attempt causing it to swing and sends Bella landing closer to you than they had originally intended. When you didn’t pull away, they didn’t either. The two of you, sit in silence staring up at the starry sky. Eventually Bella is the one to break the silence.

“Can I be honest with you?”

“Of course.” You respond, sitting up on your elbows so you can see them better. They begin speaking, not daring to look at you.

“I said I knew Ialways had feelings for women. Like I always knew I liked women. The truth is I had feelings for you. When you said you were gay, I freaked out because my feelings for you could of become a reality. I think that’s the real reason I pushed you away. I knew I couldn’t be in your life as just a friend but also that I wasn’t ready to be out. I don’t if that makes sense and know I’m rambling. I’m sorry.” Bella finally gains the courage to look at you after their words.

“It’s okay.” You smile, biting you lip. Thinking this is the moment you’ve been waiting for.

“So you’re not mad at me?” Bella asks.

“Not at all. The real question though, are those feelings still there?” You ask, curiously. Your tone a little flirty.

“They’ve always been there. Bumping into you only reignited them. Then you actually said yes to meeting up with me, I couldn’t believe it. I still don’t believe it.”

“Believe it.” You laugh before closing the space between you two. Letting your lips kiss Bella’s for the first time. It takes them a moment to fully register what’s happening, shortly kissing you back. Their hands reach for your head pulling you in closer. You’re the one to pull away, needing to catch your breath. That only lasts a few moments before they’re the one initiate the second kiss. The two of you spend a few hours on the hanging chair. Kissing, laughing and talking about anything and everything. Only going inside because it began to rain. That night you guys stayed up so late, some time around 3am Bella asked you to be their girlfriend. You said yes.

[nyubiecore]

Paris In The Rain ☆ kim sunwoo

a the boyz sunwoo oneshot

" walking down an empty street puddles underneath our feet "

kim sunwoo x fem reader

genre : fake relationship , frenemies to lovers , fluff , kiss

in which the fake relationship you both agreed upon started to feel too real to be fake in Paris , the City of Love

a beep noise came from your phone , notifying you of a new message

you reached for your phone beside you as you pressed the on button , now displaying a selfie of you and sunwoo that you guys took before taking off

you checked the message from sunwoo :

" wyd "

" taking a shit "

" why'd you even bring your phone w/ you to the toilet "

" jk " " just chilling at the balcony " " why? " seen by sunwoo

you only roll your eyes and enjoyed the view of Paris in the rain. you've heard from your mom that Paris looks the most beautiful when it rains . you smile to yourself as you take some pictures of the Eiffel Tower from your hotel room to show to your mom

your class had arranged a week trip to Paris in the holidays , you got to share rooms with your best friend , Yoora for the week

at first , you didn't want to go since it costs a hefty amount of money but since you figured it would be one of the last memories in high school so why not , since your apparent fake boyfriend offered to pay half of it that you thanked him for the thought but still pay all of them off yourself - with some help from your parents of course

" why why? is it sunwoo? " Yoora asked from inside the room where she sat on the bed

you looked over your shoulder , " yeah , but he put me on read " you said in your most annoyed tone

she smiled " this is good times , you should go on a date with him tomorrow since we're free anyways "

" i won't bother " you replied

she let out a huff in defeat " hey you guys are couples in love , we are in the city of love , do you see my point right here? "

you stopped on your track then moved to join her inside " does it look like that? do you really think he's in love with me? "

" are you a fucking fool? everyone could see that you moron "

" what do you mean? "

" ask any of our classmates who've never seen him staring at you hopelessly , and that one time you almost fainted in class that he escorted you to the nurse's office even if he knows he needs to pass that class " Yoora said half defeated " don't keep denying it Y/N , cut yourself some slack will you? just because of that jerk you saw last summer and it didn't work out make you think it'll never work out , okay? " she continues comforting your overthinking self

you were silenced

since you guys started this agreement just because of some petty ex-boyfriend of yours who's currently a psychopath that would chase you all the way down the worm's hole to get back with you

and his possessive fangirls who'd never shut up and chase him everywhere , there's not one person in your class that has found out about this agreement and only compliments about how cute you guys are

at some point , you yourself were confused about this. is it really fake? since the last 3 month you guys became the school's hottest ship , it would be a lie to say that you've never had a thought to actually put hope in this relationship and never fluttered upon his actions

like that one time you didn't answer his text because you were crying over the miserable life you were put in and he searched for you all over town until he found you , finally hiding at the playground all by yourself

but all of those thoughts didn't last long as you kept hearing voices about how he is bad news , that he's a big red flag and that one time he cheated on 3 girls at the same time

some oil were also poured into the flame by his fans who couldn't sit back and watch you guys happy and always , searched for any possible chances to judge you , trample you and gaslight you that sometimes you even felt so small that you were scared to even face them at some point

you snapped out of your thoughts when you felt your arms getting swayed by Yoora

" girl? Y/N? gosh stop with the daydreaming , the doorbell rang , go check it out will you? " she said

you blinked your eyes , coming back to your senses as you rush to the door

you pushed down the door knob , opening the door revealing sunwoo , in his comfortable hoodie over his head and a hot pink colored umbrella on his right hand

" wanna go for a night walk , princess? " he said in an attempt to charm you

sunwoo always likes to give you pet names but since last time you guys watched a classic movie about the royal family , he started to call you princess and couldn't stop talking about it

your heart fluttered a bit but you couldn't possibly show him that " in this weather? " you ask ridiculed

his brow hanged higher than the other as he showed off the umbrella on his hand

" in this? " you continued as you looked at yourself in a graphic pajama set

his lips corner curled up , " if you'd like to , i won't mind but i could wait here if you mind the cute fit " he chuckled to himself

you gave him an eye as you asked him to wait while you go put on a proper clothes for the ocassion as Yoora give you the eyes

by a few minutes , you came back out in a white sleeved crop top and black loose jeans

sunwoo stood on his feet as he checks you out

you roll your eyes " keep your eyes to yourself would you? "

he smirked " sorry to offend you princess "

you guys walked to the lobby and sunwoo leads you along the revolving door until you guys came outside the hotel , taking in the scent of the rain and the sound of Paris's bustling streets

walking on the sidewalks of the road , sunwoo opened the umbrella that mostly covered you

" what's with this hot pink umbrella? " you laugh

" shut up " he said as he roll his eyes

" hehe"

you wanted to say something about how his other hoodie side that were exposed to the rain were clearly wet but you knew he wouldn't bother.

while walking , you came over a wine shop

you look at sunwoo who were already looking at you as you smile cheekily

" can you read my mind? " you asked as you nudged sunwoo's side

" I can't read minds but I can see what's in front of us " he replied

you nudged harder to his side as you rushed to cross the streets

after a successful attempt of buying the cheapest wine , you guys were seated at one of the bench near the Eiffel Tower

you drank straight from the wine bottle and swallowed the berry flavor.

the rain had stopped raining by this time

sunwoo just looks at you

you took in the view of the big Eiffel Tower in front of you. far from what you expected , you couldn't actually hold your liquor as much as you thought you could.

you grunts as you leaned into the bench

" I'm so glad that I'm here now , right? " you turned your head towards sunwoo who were quietly looking at you

he smiled to himself as he nods softly " me too "

maybe it was the air , maybe it was the wine - it should be the wine - but you felt like you were free off pressures and your right mind because …

you smiled cheekily " did you know? that none of our classmates suspected our relationship? " you chuckled " I mean , it's such a sudden thing but how could they be so gullible , right? " you said as you chuckle

sunwoo stayed quiet - furious? - as he reached for the bottle of wine and took a sip of it

you watch him as he put the bottle down " oh? did we kiss just now? ommo ommo " you said as you laugh drunkenly

he only kept quiet as he avoids eye contact with you

" hey , I'm sad that you act so relaxed over my first kiss " you say making a sad expression

" princess , that's not a real kiss okay? it's just an indirect kiss " he said earning a nudge to his side

you look up at the Eiffel Tower , " did you know? I heard from that if you go to watch the Eiffel Tower in the rain with your lover , your love will last for a long long time " you said drunkenly

" who says that? " sunwoo asked

" me! " you said as you pointed to yourself and chuckle

" then, we're going to be lovers aren't we? "

" ey , how can the kim sunwoo of Daeryeon High date a nobody like me. you won't know how much it takes to date you even if it's fake " you let out a huff

" why is it hard? "

" your lover would have to see your table full of gifts from girls prettier than her everyday , don't even mention the judging eyes she'll get from your die hard fans too , oww even talking about it sends me shivers to the bone " you say hugging yourself on the bench

he stopped on his track. it's not like he never knew how bad girls who've had relationship with him got bashed. it's just , since you he started to feel eager to keep the relationship though he knows you're having a hard time , ofc he tries to protect you at all cost tho

" so you won't do the role? " he laughs

" do you want me to? " you jokingly say as you make eye contact with his sweet eyes

the sudden eye contact only triggered sunwoo and you didn't really mind it since you were drunk and everything

he looked away , his cheeks slightly tinted with pink blush " what if I say I want , then what will you do then? "

you stopped , " hek " you got hiccups. you embarrassingly cover your mouth and looked forward

he smiled looking at you " we should go now " he stands up as he wrapped his arms on your side holding you steady while you hold the wine bottle on your hand

maybe because of the late hours or the choice of way , the streets seems a bit more quiet not in a spooky way , just comfortable? or maybe it was because of your company? you didn't know anymore as the alcohol takes control of your brain

along the road , you saw a flower shop that were still open and many bouquet and varieties of flowers from the glass

" pretty tulips " you said drunkenly

he looked at the flower shop

" wait here " he said before abandoning you outside the flower shop

he ran back out in a few minutes with a few tulips wrapped in his hand then hands it to you

" what is it? oh! tulips! " you say as you clap repeatedly

he only smiled as you take the tulips from his hand

you guys continue the walk as it freshen you up

but the unstraight walk didn't go away

" princess , can't you walk straight? it's dangerous "

you only chuckled " hey do you like me? why do you call me princess all the time , it made me flutter.. " the last part was said in a lower voice

he only shake his head

you kept the unstraight walk until you wanted to cross the road that you almost did carelessly

when a bicycle almost hit you , that you felt a hand on your elbow pulling you back from the road , turning your body to the owner of the hand and sending your tulips to bounce to the sky

panicked sunwoo is now a few inches to your face , you could smell the light scent of wine from his breath that were fanning your face

" gosh you're so clumsy " he said but didn't break the close proximity

your eyes broke into an emotional eyes " hey , can you stop making my heart flutter? do you know how much I started to like you since 3 months ago? "

he was taken aback for a bit but the emotions left his eyes as it went to your lips

" what if I like you " he said

" don't make those kinds of jokes , it hurts "

you said before seeing your tulips that is now stuck on one of the tree branches

you point at it " my tulips "

sunwoo looked at the spot you pointed to , him being a few cm lower from the branch helped as he reached for it

it became a failed attempt , so he held the end of the branch and shake it lightly sending the tulips to almost reach the ground when you and sunwoo tried to prevent if from falling

reaching for it , both of you accidentally held hands - with tulips in it - and were faced in the same proximity from just now

you turned to face him , you scanned his delicate face

you never cared how sharp his nose and his jawline is - also the fact that he's much more handsome than you imagined , you were pretty much in awe

" your nose is so well sculptured "

" stop that , princess "

" stop that pet name "

" what if I like you that's why I give these pet names? "

you stopped on your track

" you're kidding "

" are you still drunk? "

you look at him ridiculously " umm.. no? "

" then I should prove it to you " he said before bringing his hand to both your jawline and pulled your face closer to his bringing your lips together

the kiss was slow but you can feel the adrenaline pumping in your brain and your heart rate soaring

sunwoo pulled away a few seconds after

you look at him , still ridiculed " what does that kiss mean? "

" I'm sorry for stealing away your first kiss , but I do actually like you and the reason all of our classmates didn't find out isn't because they're gullible but because I liked you for real and I show my gestures to you " he said

you could see his vulnerable gaze towards you , you could fall in love in that gaze every time and now , you're sure , you're in love with him

" can I kiss you back? " you asked

" if you kiss me now , it means you are my girlfriend , real girlfriend and I won't want to let you go anytime near " he said smiling

you smiled widely as you connected your lips with his into a kiss you knew you could never forget for a long time

the kiss was firm as he wrapped his arms around your body and your arms going to wrap his neck

you pulled away for air as you tasted the last remaining taste of wine lingering on your lips

" should we go now , princess? " he asked making you flutter

you got up and wrapped your arms on his neck , gave him a peck " we should , prince " you smirked as you walked along the empty lane with him

sneakily , he reached for your hand and held it

" I guess a walk in the rainy Paris actually helped huh? " he said

-end-

thank you for reading , i think this one is kind of awkward since i'm not really good at writing these types of things so please cut me some slack :>

[hotgirlgraps]

hook x female reader??? reader is ricky starks' cousin and hook falls madly in love with her by is super shy around her at first so he does little cute things like offer her some chips, let her touch his hair, etc

Loved writing this for you! I hope you love it!

Warnings: I mean he’s so shy and sweet and a total simp if that’s a warning?? angst between him and ricky over you 🤭

There was someone he hadn’t seen before following Ricky around. He caught sight of you once and kept stealing glances multiple times after that. He didn’t want to get caught staring so he kept his hood low over his eyes but he couldn’t help himself.

He felt a little nervous when Ricky spotted him leaning up against the wall pretending to look at something on his phone after he snatched his eyes away from you. Ricky headed towards him and you followed, stopping in front of him.

“Hey man” Ricky says as he throws his arm around your shoulders. “This is my cousin, Y/N. She just got signed.” Ricky states proudly. “Y/N, this is hook.”

You were already familiar with him but never saw him in person. You would be lying if you said he wasn’t intimidatingly attractive, what with his dark eyes that stared directly into yours and the smooth, easy smile that spread across his lips, exposing a dimple. He gave you a little wave, feeling awkward when he did it but he tried to avoid that.

“Hey” he grins.

“Hi” you beam back.

You stared back at each other for a couple seconds before Ricky unwrapped his arm from your shoulders. “Hooks been a good friend of mine for a while now. You’ll probably be seeing him around a lot when he’s not hibernating” he teased, earning hooks head to drop.

“Looking forward to that.” You softly spoke, and he felt his cheeks slightly burn when you did.

“Come on, I’m hungry” Ricky said, and that’s when hooks ears perked up. “I was about to go to catering too” he says as he pushes himself off the wall. Ricky waved him along and you tried not to show that you were feeling a little excited that he was tagging along.

He walked beside you, stuffing his phone in his pocket as his arm brushed yours thanks to how narrow the hallway was. “So you’re showing her around?” Hook asks Ricky.

“Yeah, introducing her to people and all that.” He says as you walk between the two of them. “She’s pretty much met everyone except for you. Figured you were lurking in the shadows like you always do when I couldn’t find you last week” he chuckled, making you do the same.

Now he wished he wouldn’t have been sitting in the locker room listening to music after his match last week. Maybe he would’ve met you sooner.

“Damn I hate that.” He says before he actually realized it. That was supposed to stay in his head. Thankfully it didn’t seem like Ricky or you caught it.

“You can go sit down. I’ll bring you something. Hook, you want anything?” Ricky asked as you entered catering.

“Nah man, I’m good.” He shakes his head as he sits down at the first table. You slowly take the seat across from him.

“So” you smile at him, and apparently that smile was contagious. “You’re nicer than you seem on tv”

His heart might have fluttered at the fact that you already knew who he was. He probably should’ve expected that but he didn’t.

“Yeah, I think I am, at least.” He chuckles as he runs his hands through his wild hair. “You uh, gonna be in the ring soon?” He was making conversation, aiming to learn a little more about you, but trying to be discreet about that.

“Next week” you nod, clearly proud to say that. “I’ll be making my debut and I’m so excited. But I’m also nervous.”

“I was too.” He tells you. “I remember calling my mom right before I had my first match and telling her how my heart felt like it was gonna explode. But when you get out there, it’s different. You kind of forget how nervous you were and snap into it. And when it’s over all you want is to do it again.”

You listened intently, taking note of the way he spoke and the eye contact he held the entire time, barely even blinking.

Just then Ricky came back with three slices of pizza, passing them out. “Don’t tell me you’re not hungry, I know you’re always hungry so shut up and eat.” He tells hook who drops his head to hide the laugh.

Ricky sits down next to you and takes a bite, chewing rather aggressively. “You don’t have to eat like that.” You glare when he smacks his lips. “Just eat like a normal person for once.”

Hook chuckled as he took a bite of his pizza.

“I went and got you pizza so quit complaining and eat.” Ricky says with a mouth full. You rolled your eyes but took a bite and felt thankful since you were so hungry.

“So” Ricky breaks the silence after a few moments. “Y/N tell you she’s about to have her first match next week?” He looks at hook who’s eyes keep trying to go back to you but he fights against it and nods. “Yeah, she did.”

“I feel sorry for anyone who steps in the ring with her man. You should see the shit she can do.”

That’s when hook did look back at you and caught the smile across your lips when he said, “I imagine so.”

A couple minutes later, after you were all finished eating, Ricky looked at the time. “Shit, my match is starting soon.” He says. “Come on, I’ll show you where the viewing room is. You can wait for me back there.”

You nodded but wished you didn’t have to leave. You stood up and offered hook a single wave and a smile before you left. He nodded his head and sat there after the seats in front of him were empty, wishing they weren’t.

You were sitting in the viewing room waiting for Ricky’s match to start when the door opened, and to your surprise, in came hook.

“Hey” you greeted him and slid over, making room on the couch.

“Hey” he nodded, sitting down with a little distance between you. “I didn’t have anywhere else to be. My match isn’t for another hour so, I figured I’d watch Ricky’s match too.”

You nodded back, dropping your head to keep from smiling too hard. He adjusted the collar of his hoodie and leaned back against the cushions, then you heard the sound of a bag crumpling and saw that he had pulled a bag of Doritos out of his hoodie pocket.

He ate three before he became self conscious about how loud his chewing sounded. He glanced over at you with your eyes on the screen but you were aware of his gaze.

“You want some chips?” He asked, extending the small bag.

You looked down at it, but shook your head. “Those are my favorite but I’m good. Thank you though.”

He wanted to finish them but he felt so awkward being the only one eating so he folded the bag and stuffed it back in his pocket.

He kept stealing glances of you, wanting to ask you so many questions but he couldn’t get the words out. You were watching the screen with a bunch of questions of your own on the tip of your tongue. You were just a little more confident than he was.

“So I’ve always wondered this, but do you style your hair like that or do you let it just do whatever?” You asked without looking at him. A dust of pink blushed his cheeks and he looked down when he felt it.

“Usually yeah, I just let it do what it wants.” He says as he runs his hands through it. He glanced back over to see you watching as he ran his hands through it and fluffed the roots.

“Can I touch it?” You chuckled, cause it sounded weird to ask. But you always wondered if it was soft and fluffy or if it was more like porcupine spikes.

He smirked and tilted his head towards you, silently giving you the answer.

“Soft” you said as you ran your hand over the ends.

“Did you think it wasn’t?”

“Sometimes it looks a little spiky.” You tell him, and he couldn’t help but to laugh at that.

Just then, Ricky came through the door and you both realized you didn’t even know the match had ended. He stopped as soon as he saw you and hook sitting next to each other and a strange look played on his face.

“Hey again, hook” he deadpanned.

Hook could tell that him being in the room alone with you wasn’t sitting right with Ricky and he wasn’t sure what to say about that. He nodded and stood up. Ricky eyed him for a minute before his eyes fell on you.

“I was gonna let you know I’m going to the weight room if you wanted to come.” But you shook your head.

“Actually I’d rather just stay in here and watch the rest of the show.” You only wanted to see hooks match but you weren’t going to tell Ricky that.

“Alright.” He eyed you. “Well, why don’t you come with me then?” He turned his attention to hook. There was an insinuation to that and it didn’t take a genius to tell it.

“I have a match soon or I would.”

“Your match isn’t for another forty-five minutes. C’mon.” He said, wrapping his arm around his shoulders, giving him no choice as he lead him out the room.

“So, you and my little cousin are getting along it looks like.” Ricky says as they enter the weight room. Hook nods slowly, picking up on the weird energy.

“Yeah, she’s cool.” He casually stated as he grabs a dumbbell and started curling his arm.

“Yeah” Ricky says as he sits on the weight bench, but doesn’t bother actually using it. Hook avoids his stern gaze and keeps his attention on his mini workout.

“She’s a nice girl.” Ricky says, holding his sights on hook. “She’s always been good as gold. She doesn’t need to ruin that now.”

Hook stilled, but didn’t look over at Ricky. “What does that mean?” He asked.

“It means she doesn’t need any distractions. I saw the way you were looking at her. I’m not stupid.”

He thought he’d been discreet but apparently not enough.

“I was just being nice.” He lied, and Ricky clearly didn’t buy it.

“The last thing she needs is to get all tangled up in a fling with anyone in this company. She needs to focus on her career. She’s just getting started and I’m not gonna let you get in the way of that.”

“Why would I do that?” His eyes finally meet Ricky’s. “I mean, I don’t even like her like that, but even if I did and I wanted to be with her, I would never hold her back from anything!”

“I know you, tyler.” Ricky’s use of hooks real name took him back a little bit. “You must’ve forgot that. I know how you are with women.”

“How am I?” Tyler dropped the dumbbell. “I wanna know too, cause I don’t see the issue with me and your cousin even if we did wanna start hanging out or something. What have I ever done wrong? I never disrespect women. I’ve never even been with one the whole time I’ve been in AEW so how would you know how I am with them?”

Ricky’s mouth clamped shut for a moment.

“Exactly.” Tyler stood up, about to leave the weight room before Ricky called after him.

“She’s my cousin, man. My baby cousin. I just don’t want to see her get hurt.”

“Who would hurt her?” Hook spun around. “I sure as hell wouldn’t. And besides, you think I don’t already know that? You think I don’t already know you would beat my ass if I ever hurt her? I get that, but you don’t even have to worry about it because like I told you, I don’t like her like that. I just wanna be her friend and no, I’m not gonna hurt her regardless.”

Ricky eyed hook for a moment after before he nodded stiffly. Hook nodded back as a silent understanding that the conversation was over.

From that point on youd noticed that he was a little more distant than he was that first day you met him. He didn’t talk much when you tried to make conversation with him, unlike before and it confused you.

You had your first match and Ricky was waiting in the gorilla for you when you came back, engulfing you in a hug. “That was awesome, you did fucking fantastic!” He proudly said.

“Thank you” you breathlessly say back. “I’m gonna go shower now, but I’ll meet you in catering.”

And he let you head towards the showers but as you were about to walk around the corner, hook appeared. He looked a little taken back when he saw you and you didn’t know if you should’ve tried to talk to him or not since he’d been giving you short replies so much lately but you did manage to smile at him.

“Congratulations” he says as he pulls one AirPod out of his ear. “I saw it from the viewing room. You did great.”

You smiled from ear to ear and that alone made his heart flutter in his chest. His hands were clammy like they had been getting around you and he wiped them over his green shorts.

“Thank you” you say. “And you were right. I wasn’t nervous when I actually got in the ring”

He nods back. “I told you”

There was a moment of silence and it was making him nervous himself. He felt himself shying away from your soft, wide eyes as he looked down at his feet.

“You have a match?” You asked when you looked at his taped up hands.

“Yeah, in a little bit.” He nods.

“Well I’ll be watching then.” You smile up at him. “Good luck.” You say before you brush past him, running your hand down his bicep.

“Thank you.” He muttered when you were already gone.

You caught him in catering the next week and took the seat across from him. He didn’t notice you because he was looking at his phone but when he felt the tip of your boot tap his under the table he looked up and his lips tipped up in a smile.

“Oh, hey” he said as he pulled the AirPod out of his ear.

“Hey” you smiled back. He looked around the room, no sign of Ricky.

“You’re alone for once” he chuckled.

“Yeah, Ricky has a match right now. I didn’t feel like sitting in the viewing room all by myself so, here I am”

He nodded back and locked his phone. “Feeling a little better about this whole thing yet?” He asks.

“Yeah, I’m ready for my next match but it’s not until next week. I just wanna get back in the ring already, it’s so exciting.”

He has to cover his mouth with his fist to hide the smile on his face as he watches your eyes light up.

“What about you?” You asked. “Do you have a match tonight?”

“Nah, just waiting for my dad so we can head back to the hotel, really.”

“I get that.” You say as you look down at his knuckles tapping against the tables. “I have to wait for Ricky too.”

He nods back and you both fell silent again, until you broke it when you said, “where is the weight room at? I asked Ricky to show me but he never did. I wanna do a couple workouts. I can’t just sit around the arena for hours.” You chuckled.

“It’s uh, down the hall to the right, and then down that hall to the left, and then across that hall.”

You blinked twice at him and he smirked before he pushed the seat back. “I’ll show you” he said as he stood up.

You entered the weight room after taking a bunch of weird and confusing turns and he followed you over to the benches, where you grabbed a dumbbell and held it straight out in your hand.

“So” you said as you stared at his reflection in the mirror you were facing. “Ricky told me you and him talked about me.”

His face instantly flushed when he heard that, hands clamming up in his pocket.

“What did you talk about?”

He wasn’t sure if you already knew and we’re just getting him to tell you or if you really didn’t know. He shifted on his feet and ran his sweaty hand through his hair.

“Uh, nothing really. Just kind of talked. I don’t know.” He shrugged, feeling the nerves set in when your eyes caught his in the mirror.

“Well he’s under the impression that we need to stay away from each other for some reason. Told me I didn’t need to get too close to you, or something, I wasn’t really listening. Didn’t really care. I just told him I can do what I want and I like you, so if I want to be your friend, then I can be your friend.”

He was a little taken back to hear that, but he hid that fact.

“Is that what he was telling you? To stay away from me?” Your eyes stayed on his reflection as he dropped his head.

“Uh, yeah, kind of.”

You scoffed. “He’s always done that to me. He doesn’t want me around anyone. He thinks I’m gonna be influenced to do something bad, like I can’t make choices of my own.”

“He’s just looking out for you, but I get it. If I had a little cousin here, I’d probably feel the same way.” He picks his head up.

“Yeah, I guess.” You say before you set the dumbbell down and turn to face him. “Anything else you two talked about?”

That’s when it was clear to him that you knew the whole conversation. You just wanted him to tell you about it, and he was way too shy to have that kind of confidence even if he wanted to.

“Uh, I mean, kind of but-“ he had to look away from you, or he was gonna be tongue tied.

“Wanna know what him and I talked about?” You decided to ask, catching his attention. “We talked about how he thinks you look at me a certain way and I do the same thing with you. And how he doesn’t think you and I should even be friends but, you know what I told him?”

He swallowed thickly, “what?”

“I told him that if you wanted me, I’d say yes.”

He was astonished and absolutely speechless. His eyes were wide as he stared back at you, so many words rolling around in his brain but nothing came out.

“So, I’m just putting that out there for you.” You smirked as you reached down and grabbed the dumbbell again.

It took him a minute to regain his composure for him to realize the ball was in his court and he was being presented with something that’s been running through his mind for a while now.

Ricky, probably not too happy, but he didn’t think about that when he walked up to you and grabbed the dumbbell from your hand, setting it down on the bench.

His heart was hammering but it was sure when you smiled up at him. His clammy hand grabbed your soft one ever so gently before he tilted his head to the side slightly and leaned in a little closer.

“You really mean that?” His voice was barely above a raspy whisper, and you nodded simply before you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck. “I do.” You whisper back before he placed a tender, slow kiss to your lips.

“Your cousin might kill me later.” He smirked against you, making you chuckle.

“Not a chance” you whispered back, pulling him closer against you.

[lucid-romances]

The Family Ranch

Spencer Reid x Fem Reader

The reader takes Spencer home to meet her family.

Word Count: 1k

Genre: Fluff

A/N: Remember when he told JJ he wanted to be a cowboy? I remember.

Spencer drives slowly, his hands gliding over the steering wheel of his Volvo Amazon, which had seen better days.  He rolls down the windows, and his unmanaged curls get caught in the summer breeze. They become a crown framing his face, kept from his eyes solely by the pair of sunglasses that shielded them.  The road had long since turned from smooth pavement to trails of gravel inlined with dirt.  (Y/N)'s childhood home hides behind valleys and hills, a small ranch tucked away from the rest of the world. 

They can see the pasture of cows before they see the house, and (Y/N) sits at attention, crooning at the many calves shepherded by their mothers and kept in line by a Great Pyrenees.  The dog turns to watch the car tumble down the road but doesn't dare to leave his post. 

The sun is high in the sky, it's a hot day for Virginia,  and (Y/N)'s already rolling up the cuffs of her jeans to prepare for time in the mud. Spencer watches her from the corner of his eye, pleasantly surprised to see her shuck off the professionalism she had to wear at the BAU. 

They pass by a mailbox, its white metal covered in years' worth of colorful handprints.  "Excited to be home?" He asks, not for the first time, in a tone sweeter than honey. 

The Volvo lurches to a stop, and the screen door of her parent's house opens before she can respond. The words are unnecessary because she's out of the car before he can count to three and scooping up an eight-year-old boy in her arms.  Spencer recognized him from pictures, with his freckled skin and outcrop of curly hair.  His flannel was two sizes too big for him, a lizard sat in the pocket of his overalls, and as (Y/N) would say, he was undeniably Daniel. 

"You've gotten so big!" (Y/N) says as Spencer retrieves their bags from the trunk.  He had his reservations about staying the night with her family.  Mostly, he worried they wouldn't like him, but if they were anything like the girl he'd started to consider a permanent life with, he knew he would come to love them just as much. 

"Maybe you've just gotten shorter, Auntie." Daniel teases, and Spencer notices he has (Y/N)'s smile. 

"You think? No, it's all you, kiddo, you're growing up on me!"  (Y/N) hugs the boy again, finally letting herself miss her family after living in Quantico for the past year.  "Do you remember Spencer? You spoke on the phone." 

Daniel's gaze sweeps over the older man as he approaches, squinting at the dress shirt and slacks he wore, unaware of how casually Spence happened to be dressed compared to usual.  "Everyone is excited to meet you." 

"Are they?" Spencer's heart soars. "I'm excited to meet you all too! Who is your friend?"  

Daniel pulls the lizard from his pocket and holds it aloft to Spencer, giving him a view of the spotted Bearded Dragon, rough to the touch. "His name is Dash." 

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Dash.  Did you know that Bearded Dragons are one of the few lizards who will mimic other creatures?" Spencer tilts his head to stick out his tongue, and when Dash reciprocates, Daniel takes a surprised step back. 

"Woah! You have to come show my mom!"  

When Daniel takes off towards the house, (Y/N) loops her arm around Spencer's. "You're good at that." 

"What's that?" 

"Kids." 

Spencer shrugs, unwilling to admit that he finds children easier to talk to than most adults. "That's just because Dash vouched for me." 

"A pretty cool guy, that Dash."  (Y/N) plays along, leading Spencer inside as Daniel approaches a woman at the stove.  Her light hair contrasts (Y/N)'s, but they share the same eyes.  She watches with patience that only a mother could know as Daniel tries several times to get Dash to stick out his tongue.  When it finally works, the woman offers him a beaming smile before acknowledging the couple in the doorway. 

"The FBI has finally released my baby sister back to us humble cattle ranchers? Bestill my beating heart!"  The woman, who Spencer knew to be Amelia, crosses the room to pull her sister into a bone-crushing hug.  Spencer has to let (Y/N) go to allow this, but he isn't out of the woods yet.  Amelia appraises him, trailing her gaze from his head to his toes.  "He's cuter in person." 

"Amy!" 

"What? You don’t mind, do you, Spencer? I'm just repeating the things (Y/N)’s said about you." 

Spencer beams, his gaze flickering between the two siblings.  Their dynamic reminded him of how Derek continues to tease him daily. "Not at all. I hope everything she says about me is half as nice." 

"Like you wouldn't believe! 'His eyes are so dreamy. I love it when-'"  (Y/N) cuts off the embarrassing stories, most from when she first started working at the BAU and barely knew Spencer as an acquaintance.  She shoves Amelia back towards the stove, threatening to knock a pan of homemade chicken noodle soup from the burner.  "Hey, hey! Chasing serial killers has made you violent! MA!" 

Amelia raises her voice so she’s heard in the recesses of the house, and not a few moments later, an older woman comes skidding into the room.  She has the same friendly deposition as her daughters. Her skin’s notably wrinkled from years of hard labor, but there's a kindness in her eyes that Spencer can't ignore.  "What's all the fuss about? (Y/N)! When did you get here?" 

The mother and daughter close the distance between themselves.  Spencer can't help noticing how tightly (Y/N) clings to her parent as if proving all her sleepless nights- fearing that she would never see them again- wrong.  

"Hey, Ma," she finally says, after moments trickling into minutes.  "I brought a boy home." 

Everyone calls her Ma, even the people down the valley in the closest town, but Spencer knows her name is Beth.  Against his better judgment, he holds his hand out to her, expecting a polite handshake to break the ice, yet he's not surprised when he's pulled into a hug. "Doctor Reid!"  She greets him with an open welcomeness he isn’t used to. "We're so excited to have you finally join us. I hope you don't mind roughing it out here." 

"Spencer, please, and not at all!  Your home is lovely, and so is your family." 

"Well, that’s very kind of you! You've both made it in time for lunch. Why don't you get comfortable while I find your father?” Beth excuses herself before the couple can respond. 

Spencer finds himself at the dining room table, served a bowl of soup while having a riveting conversation with Daniel about the local reptile population.  He was more comfortable in (Y/N)'s childhood home than expected, and even as the rest of her family settled to join them for their meal, he couldn't help holding her hand beneath the table. 

[jisforjudi2]

THE FAITHFUL SECRETARY

Chicago Tribune

UPDATED: August 10, 2021 at 12:23 a.m.

Before the women’s movement, back when Father knew best and network TV made room for Daddy, when Mary Tyler Moore was Laura Petrie, not Mary Richards, actress Barbara Hale was playing a single working woman on TV.

Hale, now 71, remembers what appealed to her about the role of Della Street, secretary to lawyer Perry Mason on the series that was based on the mysteries by Erle Stanley Gardner.

“When we started (in 1956), it was the beginning of women not working at home. I liked that she was not married. My husband didn’t have to see me every week married to another man, and our children didn’t have to see me mothering other children.

“When (my son) Billy was in the 1st grade, we went to school for the first parent meeting, and on his desk were little projects he’d made-pictures of Daddy and Mommy and his sister and his animals. And underneath my picture-I wish I had it now, but the teacher kept it-he’d written in inch-high block letters, `This is my mom. I love her. She is a secretary.”‘

On Friday, the latest Perry Mason two-hour movie, “The Case of the Telltale Talk Show Host,” will air on NBC, one of seven productions that will carry the courtroom stalwart and his unflappable Girl Friday into 1994.

“I guess I was just meant to be a secretary who doesn’t take shorthand,” she quips. “My assistant wants you to know I’m a lousy typist too-33 words a minute!”

The Emmy award-winning actress is a Hollywood survivor-going into her second half-century in a profession she never dreamed of pursuing. A veteran of the old studio system and of television’s infancy, her co-stars in those early years were household names-Sinatra and Cagney and Stewart and Mitchum-when she was the ingenue.

RKO Studios was her “paid education,” as she puts it, her training ground. She met her husband, actor Bill Williams (who died several months ago), over coffee at the studio commissary.

Today, she still offers ample evidence of the effervescent beauty she was in the ’40s and ’50s-and even earlier, in Rockford High School, when her buddies entered her in a May Queen contest and she won. “I still know them, dear, and we 15 get together every three years. It takes three years to get over the three days we spend together!”

Her career seems to have evolved from being on the right Chicago street corner at the right time.

The daughter of a Rockford horticulturist and a homemaker, Hale (born in DeKalb) was studying at the Chicago Academy of Fine Arts, living at the Harriet M. McCormick branch of the YWCA and planning a career as a commercial illustrator and portraitist.

One day, as school let out for the summer, she was standing at the corner near the Drake Hotel with a girlfriend who’d come to town for a couple of weeks to look for modeling work. While they were waiting for the bus taking them to the North Side, a car drove up and someone tossed a card at them. It referred them to a modeling agency.

“A couple of weeks later, I went to see my buddies, and I told one of them the story about the card,” she recalls.

“She said, `Barb, you’re kidding! I was sitting in the little coffee shop at work this morning, and a lady came in and sat next to me, because it was the only seat left. She was pouting. I asked if she had a problem, and she said, “Yes, darn it. I have a model agency and I saw this kid on a corner, in a red coat, and can’t track her down. She’s exactly what one of our ad agencies is looking for.” Barb, what coat did you have on that day?

“I said, `My red coat-it’s the only coat I have.’ And she said, `Barb, I think that card was meant for you.”‘

It was. Hale went in to the Seaman Agency, and stopped Connie Seaman in her tracks. “She said, `Oh, my God-honey, don’t move! Al, get over here quick!’ Al came in and said, `It is her! Let’s see-we’ll shape her eyebrows, put on a little more lipstick, pull her hair back … ‘ and I said, `Just a minute, sir-what are we talking about?”‘

Hale was “a green 19” when she began fashion modeling, and after about a year and a half, RKO offered her a six-month tryout. The day after she arrived in Los Angeles, she visited the studio and its casting director, Dick Stockton.

“As I was shaking hands with him, the phone rang. He took the call, and as he listened, he started looking at me. `Yeah, yeah, yeah, just a minute.’ He turned to me and asked, `Honey, can you say a line?’ I said, `I don’t know.’ He said into the phone, `There’s a kid in the office right now. I think she’ll work. I’ll send her right over.’ He told his assistant, `Take her to wardrobe, take her to makeup, take her to Stage 6. One of the kids is sick. We’ve got to have a girl there immediately.’

“It hit every paper the next day. Cinderella story. First day on the lot, she gets-of course they said a starring part. I had one line, but you know about those things.”

Apart from that walk-on, in “Gildersleeve’s Bad Day,” she made her debut in 1944 in “Higher and Higher,” opposite Frank Sinatra.

Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, Ginger Rogers and Jane Russell were all at RKO then. So was Burr-who would be her TV series co-star about a dozen years later.

Hale studied dancing and singing at the studio. She began to appear on screen regularly-four movies in 1944, two in 1945-and eventually won leads in such movies as “The Boy With Green Hair,” “The Window,” “Jolson Sings Again” and “The Jackpot,” performing even while pregnant.

“I told Billy (her son, actor William Katt, who starred in the television series “The Greatest American Hero”) he should put on his resume that he was in `The Jackpot’ and `Lorna Doone,’ and he said, `Mother, I wasn’t,’ and I told him, `Oh, yes, you were!”‘

She continued her movie career and was a mainstay of television dramas until 1956, when a producer offered her the Della Street part in the pilot of what turned out to be a 9 1/2-year run. Hale went on to win an Emmy for best dramatic actress for the role in 1959.

“We did 36 shows that first year,” she says. “And we’re still doing it!”

She says that Della “was-and still is, to a great degree-a woman who knew what everybody was thinking. She was informed, and very observant of everything that went on. That was my challenge as an actress-to be a necessary part of the office without being too aggressive. Della was quietly overpowering: She knew when to speak and when to keep her mouth closed.”

Hale sees Della as having remained constant, to an extent. Her task is basically the same. But there have been some subtle emotional changes.

“I think she’s a little more at home, relaxed, showing her knowledge not only of the case, but also of her boss. In the early days, it was all business. Today there’s more of a camaraderie between them, a little more humor and more sensitivity to each other, which comes with years of being side by side.

“She’s trying to see that he stays healthy,” she says. “She’s taking him off coffee.

After nearly 300 episodes, “Perry Mason” folded in 1966.

In the mid-1970s, the show returned briefly with other actors and faded quickly. During the ’70s and early ’80s, Hale worked sporadically. She was in the original “Airport” in 1970, and appeared opposite her son in a 1978 surfing movie, “Big Wednesday.”

In 1985, producer Dean Hargrove asked her what she thought of the idea of a “Perry Mason” reunion show. She told him, “it would be divine, but we are 25 or 30 years older than we were then.” He said the intention was to use them as they were and to bring in a few new young actors to replace cast members William Talman, Ray Collins and William Hopper, who had died.

“Dean said, `There’s a young blond kid in town. I want to talk to him, not his agent. He’s done a series-“The Greatest American Hero.” But I can’t reach him.’

“I said, `Oh, well, that young man is in Kansas City doing “The Music Man” right now, and I can get you in touch with him if you want.’ And Dean asked, `You know him?’ I said, `Dean, I changed that boy’s diapers!’ Billy played in the first nine (Perry Mason) movies, then went on to another series of his own.”

“Perry Mason Returns” in 1985 was a Nielsen triumph, and with Perry stepping down from a judgeship to defend Della against murder charges in the first episode. From then on, the Mason bunch have visited America’s living rooms every few months.

After nearly four decades, Hale says the role of Della still offers unexpected moments.

“This week, at the end of the show, very quietly and very surprisingly, Perry plants one on Della,” Hale says. “It’s a first!”

Originally Published: May 16, 1993 at 1:00 a.m.

www.chicagotribune.com/1993/05/16/the-faithful-secretary/

[carefulfears]

the biggest thing about elegy is that it takes all of that unspoken isolation of this arc, and it slowly lets the audience in. the first thing that mulder says about the apparitions, is that they seem to be an "omen." an impending prophecy. and carefully, throughout the episode, both the audience and scully are waiting to see, not who the killer is, but what is being foretold. when they're going over records, and scully's nose starts bleeding, it's the one thing that they can't ignore. she wasn't even there in the previous episode. she was in the hospital. alone. they don't talk about it. she's "fine." she has "always been the strong one." just like in irresistible, years earlier, she does not want him to know how much she is struggling. but she doesn't have any control. it is dripping out of her. the sound of his voice when he says "oh, scully." and how quickly she responds "it's okay. i'm fine."

it's that kind of childlike grimace in him, the same man who flinches away from dead bodies and stares at the ground before his father. and she's so fast to try to restore order. it's okay. i'm fine. don't worry, i'll clean it up. i'll make it go away. when she disappears into the bathroom and sees an apparition there herself...i think she decides to go to the hospital because she just needs space, honestly. she's scared. he offers to drive her, to go with her, twice. asks, "you sure?" and she says, twice, "i'm fine."

elegy builds to two separate climaxes: the first, when mulder comes to scully's apartment. but before that, we see scully in karen kosseff's office, the same therapist that she had gone to in irresistible, and presumably has kept a relationship with in the years since. she tells karen that she's been diagnosed with inoperable untreatable cancer, and when karen asks, "you've kept working?" she answers, "yes. it's been important to me."

she's taken aback when karen asks why, is surprised at the question, and tells her "agent mulder has been concerned. he's been supportive, through this time."

KOSSEFF: Do you feel that you owe it to him to continue working?

SCULLY: (quickly) No. (pauses) I guess I never realized how much I rely on him before this...his passion...he's been a great source of strength that I've drawn on.

KOSSEFF: What happened last night, Dana?

SCULLY: I saw something. I, I don't know what to trust. If I saw it because of the stress, because the image had been suggested to me or if it was a suggestion of my own fears.

KOSSEFF: Your fear of failing him?

SCULLY: (exhales emotionally) Maybe.

this is such a rare admission from scully. first of all, she's being confronted. this is not normal. it is not normal to work to your death. it's like bill tells her, a couple of episodes later, "what are you doing at work, getting knocked down, beaten up? what are you trying to prove?"

(she hadn't even told bill about her cancer. she'd been sick for months. she thought she was going to die in memento mori, she knows she's going to die sooner than later. and she instructed her mom not to tell her brother. from the moment that mulder said "i refuse to believe that," it really was only going to go one way.)

she's being confronted. why are you working? (for mulder). do you feel you owe him? (no, i need him).

she's really alone. she's sick. like, she's really sick. she spent the last case in the hospital. she's having a hard time keeping up. she's thinning, and bleeding, and struggling. but there she goes, every day, at every hour. monster chasing. telling him she's fine.

(so much conflict comes from the way that mulder's ignorance perfectly enables scully's repression)

when he shows up, late, at her apartment, he comes in a mile-a-minute, about how he needs her "help" on the case, before asking her what her doctor said. (her answer, of course, being, "i'm fine.")

he tells her that everyone who has seen an apparition, was dying. every person who reported a premonition, was near death themselves.

SCULLY: Harold Spuller is dying too?

MULDER: Well, that's what I need your medical opinion on.

SCULLY: Well, what if he isn't?

MULDER: I would be very surprised. What is a death omen if not a vision of our own mortality? And who among us would most likely be able to see the dead? 

this is one of the most hauntingly isolating moments of the series...he has just told her that she is going to die. and he doesn't know, that that's what he said. she is forced to process it, completely by herself. and she doesn't believe in ghosts, or "premonitions," but she knows that he is right. (when is he not?)

("maybe harold is sicker than we thought he was.")

the second moment that this episode builds to, is the final confrontation between mulder and scully. after the murder is solved. after harold dies.

SCULLY: I saw something, Mulder.

MULDER: What?

SCULLY: The fourth victim. I saw her in the bathroom before you came to tell me.

MULDER: Why didn't you tell me?

SCULLY: Because I didn't want to believe it. Because I don't want to believe it.

MULDER: Is that why you came down here, to prove that it wasn't true?

SCULLY: No, I came down here because you asked me to.

MULDER: Why can't you be honest with me?

SCULLY: (defensively) What do you want me to say? That you're right, that, that I believe it even if I don't? I mean, is that what you want?

MULDER: Is that what you think I want to hear?

SCULLY: (softly) No.

they come really...close here? to talking about it? she almost baits him several times this season. she spends so much of this arc thinking...maybe, this will be it. maybe if she fucks off on assignment, gets a tattoo with another man, he'll say it. maybe if she calls him out for never celebrating her birthday, he'll acknowledge why this is the year he did. maybe if they spend a friday night with a bottle of wine, they'll talk. maybe if she tells him, those things you believe are death omens? i saw it. he'll know.

i can't remember which one of you said that all of their arguments are just how to love each other. she doesn't want to believe. but she's there, because he has asked her to be. even in all of their repressed denial, there is no escaping what's happening. it hangs over both of them.

i love the moments in this arc where she just snaps. in this scene when she says, what do you want from me? do you want me to just believe you? and her quiet resignation, when he makes her answer her own question. no. she knows that's not what he wants.

MULDER: (his voice softens) I know what you're afraid of. I'm afraid of the same thing.

SCULLY: The doctor said I was fine.

MULDER: I hope that's the truth.

SCULLY: (whispers) I'm going home.

"i know what you're afraid of. i'm afraid of the same thing."

except, no, he doesn't. and no, they are not.

but she knows what he's afraid of, just as her therapist had known what she's afraid of ("your fear of failing him?") and so she dodges his admittance with reassurance. she's fine.

that last scene, when she goes out and cries in her car, and she sees harold's ghost in the backseat. she is so alone. she's working on her deathbed. they don't talk about it. she's afraid, and she's not fine, and she is going to "fail" him because she cannot keep herself alive for him, and she can't avoid it. it's in the backseat. it's in the bathroom mirror. it's bleeding out of her.

[spicywhenspeaking]

If I'm There : Chapter Ten

read from part one

Noah and Natalie meet in high school and developed a relationship through their love of music and art. Falling in love, innocent and young, they think nothing can keep them apart. However, sometimes in the pursuit of your dreams the things we love the most get left behind

warnings: mentions of alcohol abuse and overdose, no death.

no beta reader so there might be a couple errors.

Noah was rubbing my back in soothing circles and looking at me full of concern. Kyle took a deep breath and finally told me what happened. “She was unresponsive, I called 911 and when they got there they said she barely had a pulse. She practically drank herself to death this time.” There’s pain in his voice but he seems to be calming down . “I’m with her and dads on the way. We’re at St.Peters Memorial. Can you get here?” I get out of bed and scramble to throw on my jeans with my phone cradled between my shoulder and ear. “Yeah, um I can ask Noah for a ride.” I look at him and he nods his answer, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and getting up to get himself dressed as well. “I’ll be there soon Kyle. We’ll figure this out.” I say to him. “Okay, I’ll see you soon.” The line disconnects. 

“What happened?” Noah asks as I’m frantically searching for where my bra got thrown last night. Finding it I put it on and answer. “It’s my mom. She- I don't know. Kyle found her unconscious this morning.” I trip over Noah’s guitar case getting my bra on. “Oh fuck!” He jumps up to help me up but I manage to get my balance on his desk and find my shirt. Throwing it on I grab my bag and wait for Noah to finish getting ready. In the car, my mind is racing and I bite my nail so badly that I jerk back into reality at the pain. Noah reaches his hand over to take my hand in his. “It’s all going to be okay” he tries to reassure me. “I don't know, my mom- this thing with her, it's getting so much worse,” I say leaning my head on the window, looking out and watching the road and the grass blur into one. “I just don’t know what to do anymore. My Dad tried for a while but he has no patience. One of the reasons he left her. Left all of us.” Noah squeezes my hand attempting to offer some comfort but the reality of how bad the situation with my Mom has gotten is hitting me hard. “I’ve just been ignoring it, to be honest, she and my Dad used to really get into it, yelling and screaming. After he left she got worse and I just kept to myself, focused on school and art.” I take a deep breath before going on. “Kyle, as you can tell, handled things differently.” I busy my free hand by pulling at the frayed edges that surround the hole in my jeans. “we used to be really close, you know? Twins that did everything together. After our Dad left, Mom started drinking a lot more, he would try to talk to her about it, begging her to stop.” I can feel my eyes burning with tears. I’ve told Noah a little about my mom but I was hoping it would never get this bad. “She would be embarrassed in the morning. Promising she would get better. That would last about 4 hours.” I scoff. “Pathetic.” 

Noah having been silent for so long just rubbed his thumb against the top of my hand in a gentle caress. “I’m so sorry Natty, why didn’t you tell me how bad it was?” He asks. I let out an aggravated harumph. “Not something I particularly enjoy talking about on top of how Kyle was acting. Things between us are good and I didn’t want to talk about my stupid mom's stupid drinking problem.” He nods his head “I understand, but you can always talk to me about that kind of stuff you know?” Noah is trying to reassure me, but in the few months we’ve been together we rarely talk about stuff like this. He doesn’t ever talk about his family stuff and I don’t ask. Does that make me a bad girlfriend? Ugh, I don’t know, but there’s too much going on right now for me to start worrying about my relationship. “I know, I know. You know the same goes for you too” I turn to face him and he smiles softly at him. “I know Nat.”

We finally arrive at the hospital and Noah drops me off at the ground entrance. “I think maybe I should go by myself. Kyle is likely to be pretty emotional right now, I don’t know how he would react to you being there.” He nods slowly and I can see the hesitation in his eyes. “Are you sure?” He asks. I unclip my seatbelt and gather my bag together. “Yes, it should just be us while we wait for our Dad. But thank you.” I say pulling him into a hug from across the center console. “Thank you for bringing me and I’ll call you later okay?” He hugs me back and kisses me on top of the head before pulling back and resting his head against mine. “Okay,” he kisses me softly. “Nick and I will be at the show out of town tonight but…I can cancel if you need me to?” I shake my head, “No, no don’t cancel.” The last thing I want is for him to cancel because of me.  “Just call me in the morning when you wake up and I’ll update you.” He kisses me again. “Okay, I will. I love you, Nat.” And with one last kiss, I head out of the car. “ I love you too.”

Walking into the hospital I’m hit with the thick nose-burning scent of antiseptic. Kyle told me they're on the 5th floor so I follow the signs to the elevator and make my way up. I meet Kyle in the room the assigned our mom. Kyle is sitting with his hands buried in his hands when I arrive and my Mom is asleep in the bed with wires and some tubes connected to her. The faint beat of the heart monitor is the only sound for a few moments before I make my entrance known with a soft cough. “Hey, Kyle. How are you?” I ask and he lifts his head up, standing and coming to pull me into a bone-crushing hug. I freeze not knowing what to do with my hands. “Umm okay, what's going on Kyle.” He releases me and takes a step back. “Sorry, it's just been a crazy few hours.” He holds my shoulders and looks at me and I see his red puffy eyes and tear-stained cheeks. “I thought she was dead and I-” his voice catches. “I just was so scared Sissy, what are we going to do?” Tears filling my own eyes I look between Kyle and our Mom, asleep in the hospital bed. “I don’t know Ky, what can we do? We can't make her get better, she has to want to.” Tears of sadness and anger are falling down my face. “Would she even go to rehab? She won't even go to her AA meetings anymore.” We sit in the chairs next to a large window in the far corner of her room. Kyle recounts the events of the morning. He woke up and found Mom on the couch and tried to move her before noticing she was completely unresponsive. Kyle with tear-filled eyes and panic coursing through his veins tried to find a pulse and was instructed by the 9-1-1 operator to perform CPR until the paramedics arrived. “Oh my god Ky, that's- that's a lot. Are you okay?” I ask, knowing the answer for all of us is no. “I’m okay, I’m alright, I'll be okay and so will Mom.” He's nodding his head emphatically, “She will be okay, she’ll get better.” He takes a deep breath. "She will get better.” I rest my head on his shoulder, “yeah, she’ll get better.” We sit there for a while longer and then our Dad walks in.

My Dad rushes to Mom’s bedside and takes her hand in his. “Damnit Kelly, what did you do to yourself?” He goes to his knees and brushes the hair off of her head. “This isn't the life we had planned for ourselves.” My Dad's voice goes soft and the room is silent as Kyle and I take in what's happening. So now he cares? Running to her bedside? After all this time.

“Are you kids okay?” He turns to address us. Kyle is silent in his presence so I manage out a small “Yeah, we're okay.” The doctor chose this awkward moment to come in and check in on Mom and give us an update on her recovery. He tells us that the excessive drinking will kill her if she doesn't get help and he gives my Dad some pamphlets on rehab centers nearby before heading back out the door. “Okay, here's what's gonna happen.” My Dad starts, “Your Mother is going to this treatment center until she's better.”

Kyle and I both nod in agreement. “And I’ll move in to keep an eye on you two while she's away.” My nodding stops and Kyles does as well. “Like Hell,” Kyle responds. “Nat and I have been taking care of ourselves for long enough already, we don’t need you moving in and taking over again.” I still don't know what happened between Dad and Kyle this summer but by the tone my brother is using im guessing things aren't peachy-keen with the two of them. “Watch that tone boy, I know you think you’re all grown up now but you still live in the house I pay for.” My eyes roll at that. “You don't pay for anything anymore Dad. Plus, we’re 18. You don't need to play babysitter.” He tenses up at us talking back. “Listen, your mother is sick, she needs us all to be there for her.”

My sadness is turning into anger quickly. “She needs us? Thats rich. And you're talking to us about being there for her? Are you serious?” My voice is rising. “You want to come home and play house like Mom is just off on a retreat? Kyle? What do you think?” I turn to my brother for his reaction. “Mom should go to the center, I agree with that, but you made it clear this summer how you felt about me. I’d hate to be just another disappointment you’re forced to live with.” A dissapointment? That's what my dad said to him? Ironic that it's coming from the embodiment of disappointment itself. “Ky, you know I didn't mean it.” Dad tries to soothe the sting of the words that have festered in Kyles's heart. “Stop, I don't want to hear it. If you come back to the house to be closer to Mom I won't stop you, but I’m not following orders or household rules or any of the bullshit you want to try. Nat and I are legally adults and will be out of the house soon. I’ll stay out of your hair, you’ll stay out of my life.” Dad's stern face nods sharply and he goes back down to sitting next to Mom.

Kyle exits the room and goes down the hall. I follow and call after him “Kyle, wait up.” He stops and turns around. “Can you believe him? Bastard. I shouldn't have called him” 

“No, no. it's good you did. He can help Mom more than we could. Unfortunately, she’ll listen to him.” We continue walking until we reach the elevators, taking them down and walking out of the hospital into the fresh air. “Dad kicked me out after the summer.” Kyle starts. “I was stupid on the job site. Got into a fight with one of the guys, dude broke his arm.” He runs a frustrated hand through his hair. “He fired me and told me to pack my bag. Called me a loser, a waste of space. A disappointment. Said I was the worst part of himself. The parts that he hated.. the thing that sucks is that he's right.”

I take my hand and place it on his shoulders, “No, he's not right Kyle. You're not any of those things.” pushing off my hand he backs away, “How can you say that? How can you defend me? After all of that shit last spring? After how much of a dick i’ve been? How can you see anything good in me, Nat?” He plops down on a bench and rests his head on his knees. I come to sit next to him and start softly. “Last spring was hard, you became someone I didn’t recognize. Everything with Mom and Dad has been hard on both of us and we should have been there for each other. I should have been there for you.” He looks up at me. “I should have been there for you too Sis.” We sit there in silence for a while. “Why don't we go to a movie or something. I’m sure Dad has all of this handled.” I wave absent-mindedly at the hospital behind us. “Yeah, that would be fun.”

We take the bus to the mall and get tickets to see some action movie. After sharing a large bucket of popcorn we call our Dad for an update and he lets us know Mom will be discharged tomorrow and that he will take her to the treatment center on Monday morning. By the time we get home after grabbing a bite to eat, I head up to my room. Crashing on my bed, I turn on some music and text Noah. 

Natalie: Finally home. 8:45pm

Noah: How did everything go with you Mom? 8:50pm

Natalie: eh, it’ll be okay I guess. She’s going to rehab on monday so we will see. 8:51pm

Noah: thats good news ! 9:00pm

Noah: we’re about to go on! I’ll call you tomorrow babe, Love you <3 9:00

Natalie: have a good show :) love you 2 9:02pm

I take a hot shower and put on my pajamas, falling into bed I am asleep instantly.

I wake up in the morning as the sun shines into my room, I text Noah but dont get a response, he’s probably still asleep. Heading downstairs I make a cup of coffee and sit in the living room and watch some tv. Kyle joins me later and we watch reruns of spongebob, laughing at the stupid jokes. I text Noah again but he still hasnt responded. Strange but I’m assuming that he stayed out late after the show so it makes sense he would still be asleep, especially since he woke up so early yesterday.

Dad brings Mom home a little later and she's weepy and apologetic, I don’t feel like fighting so I accept her hug and head back into my room.

It's close to 2pm and I decide to call Noah. It rings a few times before he answers with a sleepy yawn. “Hey baby, are you okay?” I laugh at his tired voice. “Yes, I’m okay. Are you okay? I texted you this morning and didn't hear back.” I hear rustling on the other side of the phone and the faint sound of Nick grumbling at Noah to be quiet. “Yeah, sorry Natty. We ended up staying out late, someone had a party after the show. Didn't get home until like 4am.” My eyes widen in surprise, “wow, that is late.” There's continued rustling and I hear the click of a door being shut. “haha, yeah. Sorry, I should have texted you that I would probably be asleep for a while.” I sigh and lay back in my bed. “It’s okay. How was the show?” And then it's like he just drank a Redbull, he's full of energy when he tells me, “Holy shit Natty, I have HUGE news! You’re going to freak out!”  

page divider from here!

Next chapter here!

taglist : @lma1986 @cookiesupplier @notingridslurkaccount @blackveilomens

thank you for reading! might be a few days before part 11! I have another one shot in my brain that I'm wanting to get out lol.

anywhooo love you!!! let me know what ya think!

[keelt9]

Chapter 3

Masterlist

Christmas was a magical day, like every year our parents built the perfect day for us. I realized I started to forget how magical it is. Last 3 years I just came home for Christmas dinner and the day after I flew back to Chicago, it didn't bother me if I came back or not, because I knew my parents or Peter’s family would be in Chicago for New Year.

On Christmas morning, Archie's footsteps were the first thing we heard, and his screaming for illusion and happiness when he saw the Christmas tree surrender by presents was memorable; the present that my parents were so worried to keep hiding was his new keyboard, which he felt over the moon. 

We spent the day in pjs eating and relaxing, watching movies all day, enjoying the time with family.

“Yeah, let's do that.” Peter claps his hands.

Mom and dad put on the table the plan to make a small New Year party, just friends and usual customers, like a small expression of gratitude.

“I'm in! Sounds fun.” Nora and I entered with plates and spoons for the cake Peter prepared.

“I can help! I'm a big boy now, grandma.” Archie turns around in my mom's legs.

“I guess I'm in too.” I lift my shoulders. “It will be bad if I refuse it right?” 

Dad pulls me by my shoulder and kisses my head. “Well, we have a party!” 

And no, no one warned me what it would mean.

“9? Isn't it too much?” Leah offered to help me with the shopping of supplies.

I shake my hands. “I stopped talking since I saw the amount of things we’re buying for a few people.” 

Leah giggles but puts the 9 bags of balloons in the basket. It's our last shopping day. Tomorrow we all spend the day cooking and decorating the coffee shop.

“Thank you so much darling.” Mom grabs Leah's face after she leaves the bags. “Don't forget to bring your parents all right?”

Leah chuckles but her parents, right now, are taking a cruise. “I'm afraid you have to deal just with me, Mrs. Stratton.”

“Enjoying life, huh?” Leah's parents spent all her childhood, teens and early 20 focused only on her and what she could need. After turning 25, the story changes and they start to enjoy themselves.

“Like teenagers.” We laughed as we kept putting our bags and packages in the living room.

The next morning, we were just finishing our breakfast when we saw the most hilarious thing of the day. Archie is wearing his small apron and huge gloves, ready to work.

“Seems you have all the cover here.” I joke as I put my plates on the washing machine. “I'll better go and start to decorate the coffee.” 

“Leah will be there?” Dad asked but Leah said she will be there in the afternoon, a wedding crisis-photo of last minute.

“Don't worry, I have everything under control.” Nora and Pete will help mom with the food and drinks, meanwhile dad, well he has a little boy to keep busy.

“See you later.” I wave my hand, taking my coat and leaving home.

I knew it! 9 bags of balloons were too much. I was here for 1 hour blowing up gold, white, black and silver balloons and I barely empty 3 bags.

“Agh, if I just…” I pretend pinching all the balloons in the bag, one more time talking alone. I take a deep breath and I stand walking to the piano.

I start touching the keys when slowly a few notes of one of my favorite songs start to be heard in an empty coffee shop, Träumerei.

“Lovely.” The voice of Peter made me jump, removing my hands from the piano. When I look at the door, I notice he wasn’t alone, Leah and Joe are with him carrying a couple of trays and boxes.

Leah smiles and leaves the boxes in one of the tables. “I found them in the street, I guess we need backups.” She put her hand at her waist looking at all the balloon mess. Joe kept in silence looking at the huge amount of balloons, but when I turned around to see him I found him with a cute smile on his face, making me smile.

Slowly the time passes as we decorate all the coffee shop, follow Leah’s orders and be helpful as much as we can.

“I'm amazing.” Leah coordinates all the decorations and without a doubt she’s amazing, still I pushed her. The gold, silver, black and white stop being a mess of colors all over the coffee now looks with balance making the perfect mix.

“You should go, to getting ready. We waited for mom and dad to go too.” Peter said to us. “Joe thank you so much, you know you're welcome if you want.”

Joe keeps all day helping us, but if I remember well, he prefers avoiding big crowds on special days

“I’ll think about it, thanks anyway.” He said putting the last balloon next to the door.

Leah, fighting for her life, can't avoid expressing what's in her mind. “Mr. I Stop Talk…” I cover Leah's mouth. My family just knows we stop being closer as we were, however they didn't know we just stop talking at all.

I pulled her to the door. “We're leaving!”

“I have things to say.” Leah musters as we get into her car. “A lot actually.”

By 11 pm, in the coffee shop all our guests were there eating, drinking, chatting and some dancing. Archie is stealing everyone's heart, a lot of the people there know him since he was a little baby.

The small fruit tarts that mom made are the sensation of the night; Peter and I remember stealing a few of them everytime she made it at home. “We have more, let me bring it.”

I put my glass of wine on the table. “It's ok, I'll go.” I said after walking to the kitchen for more.

The sound of gasps and the sudden silence made me intrigued as I walked back with a new tray of tarts; my answer came across the room, Joe talking with my parents and one of their closest friends. 

“And now he comes, I still have a lot of things to say.” Leah claimed as she took the tray to put it on the table. 

During the night I practically avoid any unnecessary talk with him, still something calls for my attention; the fact that a few friends of my dad already seem to know him for the way Joe talked to them in a relaxed mood, even from time to time I heard him laughing so freely and joking back with them.

As the countdown started, all gathered next to their special one, Leah and I stuck together as the clock mark 00:00 and everyone started to hug and kiss; Leah and I hugged each other when we split, Archie came running to jump and gave me his big bear hug.

“I feel left aside.” Leah jokes with him, making Archie extend his arms and go right to her. “Yeah, I feel love now.” Archie laughs and runs to my parents.

“Go. I’ll be fine for a couple of minutes.” She points to a goodlooking guy with whom she’s been talking all night.

My favorite place from the coffee shop is the terrace. You find the perfect spot between the big buildings where you can see the sky and right now the fireworks. The view is spectacular but the cold breeze makes me shiver, closing my coat tighter around my body.

I close my eyes making my New Year wish, when I open it again, I see a small cupcake with a candle in front of me, and hands at the side of it avoiding the flame go out. 

“You can’t miss this.” Joe said at my side looking at me, the light of the fireworks making his blue eyes shine with different colors.

Every time I make a wish I blow out a candle, since I was a kid I believe if you do it, dreams have more possibility to come true.

I shutter but in Joe's eyes I can see that softness which he used to see me years ago, so I blow the candle.

“Any special wish?” I took the candle of the cupcake, catching him by surprise from my question.

“Mmm…” He clears his throat and pretends thinking. “Be better, fix mistakes and reconnect with important people in my life.” The last three words he said looked at me.

He’s honest, I know because the way he speaks clearly and confidently, reminds his eyes of mine.

“I appreciate your words Joe, but some wounds don't heal easily, I prefer to keep things the way they are right now.” He deserves an honest answer too, I press my lips together forming a smile, before going to the stairs.

“Hey, go for that ring, all right?” I said to him before I tried to cross the door.

“Y/N” I turn around, and he has a strange expression, a one I think I have never seen before. “I understand, I really do, still, I’ll be here, at any moment, any time, and any place… For you.”

His words still linger in my mind for days. Three days after our New Year, it’s time for Archie and family to go home.

“Drive safe, honey.” Mom hugs Peter and Nore before giving Archie a big kiss.

“Call when you’re home.” Dad told them as they said goodbye.

I lift Archie. “I already miss you!” He gives me a peck on my cheek. “I’ll stay a couple of days in your home before going back to work, all right?”

Archie raises his pinky finger. “Promise?” I tingle our fingers and kiss his forehead.

I carry him to his car and say goodbye to Nora and Peter, who always hugs me softly.

“Whatever you and Joe are getting through, take your time, all right?” I hold my breath but he splits from seeing me to my eyes. “Joe can be a little…mmm confused from time to time.” 

He saw my confused expression. “Oh come on, we notice that you practically ran away from the guy.” He chuckles. “I admire you, it’s hard to resist his puppy eyes and you do it like they were what? Just two blue circles.” 

I laugh and open the door for him. “I'll call when I go there all right?” Peter nods and closes the door to set all and start their way home.

Late at night dad knocks on my door like he actually didn’t want to, although he opened the door. “Are you busy?”

I was drowning in papers and my computer; I was so immersed in the manuscript that it was like something forced myself to print some drawings for some corrections and watch them live.

“Not, not that much.” I take my glass off and stand so we can sit at the window, the most clear space in my room.

Dad is searching for something with his eyes. “I wonder if you have the small <book> that I made you years ago? With the paper of the composition you like.” 

“What?” The memories of the strange visits from Joe and my dad giving him file's came. “What is happening between you and the mystery delivery of papers to Joe?”

Dad was surprised by my direct question. “Mysteriously? I won't call like that. After his wrist surgery Joe found playing piano helpful and asked me for help, so from time to time I gave him some lessons and he keeps playing as much as he can.”

I don't believe it at all. “The sheet music is for him?” 

“Of course.” Dad innocently answered but just opened the conversation for another talk.

“Why that one?” 

My mind is repeating his answer over and over making it impossible to close my eyes and rest.

“Promise me you won't say anything, but he wants to play something you like, before you go, you know like a small Christmas present.”

I swear I could be arrested for keep knocking the door of a fucking mansion in the middle of the night.

“What the…?” Joe opens the door, his eyes held close and his hair messy.

“What do you want?” I enter, raising the sheet music . “A Christmas present? What the hell?”  Angry, that's what I'm feeling right now. 

“Years ago, you stopped talking to me, looking at me, even avoiding me and now out of blue you decide you can erase everything and that's fine?” He tried to talk but I didn't let him, I felt each one of my muscles start to get tense.

“Well no, that is not happening! You can’t open or create wounds like you want. You left clear you don't want anything to have with me, FINE!” I put the papers on his chest. “Stuck with that, don't be around me trying to be my friend again!”

In vain try to leave his house but he grabs my wrist on his chest.

“Stuck?” His eyes darkened and his jaw tense. “Want to know what 's been stuck in my mind for years?”

He slowly let go of my wrist but held my hand and pulled me to him. His face was just a few centimeters from mine.

“Your kiss.”  He whispers and I raise my eyes from his mouth to his eyes.

“What are you talking about?” I observed him in detail trying to find a small sign of a lie.

“See, you talk about unfairness, but how unfair is it that you keep lingering all those years in my head, in my heart?” He raises his hand at the level of my face not touching me. “There were days where I dream of kissing you one more time but…” He closes his eyes, breathing in.

“But you didn't even remember…” I saw how slowly his eyes turned into those comforting eyes that looked at me years ago. Joe let me go but tingled his fingers on mine to avoid me going.

“Years ago, you and Leah went to a party, you're parents were so worried because you didn't pick your phone, and your dad was about to leave and picked you, but I…I didn't know, still I don't know what happened, when I noticed where I was, I'm parking in front of a house where people stumbled really drunk.” I fight for remembering but nothing comes to my mind.

“Thankfully you and Leah were sitting on the sidewalk leaning on each other; when you saw me, ran and hugged me, sober enough to recognise me. Together we leave Leah at his house but when I tried to take you home, you asked me to please stop for a while as you try to calm down.” I panic when I finally see his hand on mine, making me unable to move.

“We walked around a small park, and you slowly calmed down, after 1 hour you said you felt tipsy.” He laughs. “You sit in the grass sighing, so I sat in front of you, you talked about the college, how sacred you were of the future but at the same time exciting.”  

I have small flashbacks but at any moment a kiss appears in my mind.

“Suddenly you stopped talking and saw me right to my eyes with that…sparkle and shining eyes.” A wide open smile appears on his face. “You didn't give me time to think, you took air and you leaned with a soft peck on my lips.”

I let go of his hand shaking. I remember having a dream about this but that's what I thought it was, a dream.

“Why didn't you tell me?” I cover my face. “I'm sorry, I can't remember but I'm sorry if that…”

“I was selfish.” He whispered. “I thought those feelings, at that moment, were stupid, I was still a rookie who was injured in his first seasons, and you were in your last semesters. I won't ruin our future.”

I'm so confused, trying to figure out something about this. “You keep me away.” He nods, biting his lip.

“I knew that was the only way you keep focus on your stuff and I keep on mine… Works however look at us now.” I blink as I find support in the wall, trying to remember something about those moments.

“I’m confessing to you in the most awkward and awful way.” I slip stick to the wall, my legs definitely stop working and I sit on the floor.

“Yo…you…You what?” He turned around and breathed slowly before sitting in front of me, his eyes moving all over my face.

“I like you.” I scoff. “I mean, how could I not? A girl who drove to the other side of the city just for make me eat something sweet, the girl who spends all his free time in vacations making me company in a random talks at the coffee, the girl who was the first one in be at the hospital as soon as she arrived when I get injured, the girl who I found myself  looking for in the crowd every game.”