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kanmom51 · 4 months

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This one is kind of personal and a lot mushy

(And as I'm writing this, a bit of a rant as well)

*Be advised.😅

Been a bit.

Well, I was kind of busy. On one of those 'once in a lifetime' trips you take to celebrate a big one, this one being my 30th wedding anniversary.

And while I was on this trip (and I am sure to share some pics, cause why not, seeing we got some spectacular ones) I got to thinking about Jikook. Because, who doesn't think about Jikook on their 30th anniversary trip, right?

Let's be real for a sec. Who doesn't think about Jikook ALL THE DAMN TIME?

Obsessed much?

Hell yeah!!!😂

Proudly admitting it!!

Look at those two:

Can you seriously blame me?

Nah, but seriously.

I couldn't help but think about who I am, where I've come from, how my partner and myself came to be, our love and respect for each other, how we fought through everything life swings at you and how our love not only survived all of it but seems to have flourished even more. I can honestly say that I love my husband today even more than I did when we got married. It's a different kind of love. A mature love. A love that survived many trials and tribulations. Some you know of when you tie the knot but many more you don't expect.

And thinking of us I couldn't help but think about those two young men and how they met, what brought them together, how they connected, how they have been through so much together, the hardships, the struggles, the amazingly good and the terribly bad, all making their bond even stronger.

There are those that cannot fathom how 2 young beautiful talented men could be in a committed relationship when they have this whole smorgasbord of beautiful people just wanting to lay a hand on them. Everyone wants a piece of them and here they are in a committed relationship with each other? A long term committed relationship? How ever could that be?

When you love someone to the core, which is exactly how those two feel (people can deny it all they want, but it won't change the facts, these two have chosen each other every single time over anything and anyone else), when you get to know that one person and fall deeply in love with them, know their ins and outs, know their flaws and issues, seen them at their best and at their worst. When they are happy or sad, healthy or sick, elated or furious, and find them attractive through and through, still want to be by their side.

No.

Need to be by their side.

Want to be there when they are happy, share their joy, but also be there when they are sad or down and stand by their side to support them through it (even with and despite all those flaws and issues and difficulties that at times can also infuriate you and basically make you want to ring their necks at certain points in time) there is no love (between partners) deeper than that.

I do know, we all should, that what they experienced and how they are living cannot be compared to us regular folk. Their circumstances are such that they have to deal not only with an industry and society that deems them as 'wrong' (that includes a big chunk of their own fandom btw), but also a lifestyle that is nothing like the one we know or have experienced. The hours, the cameras in their faces close to 24/7 (up until their break and hiatus and even prior to that during the pandemic - which btw is one of the reasons people have gone mad at that point given we stopped getting an influx of BTS content for such a long time), growing up and maturing in the limelight, enjoying the fame and exposure at first and then fighting for privacy and 'anonymity' when you realize there is a price to that fame. None of us have experienced that. Yes, we can find the similarities and by extension make conclusions about them, but at the same time we always need to remember that their lives are different than ours and that we cannot always hold them to the same standards of behavior that we are used to in our own lives and relationships.

This is beside the point that every relationship is different. I will just say this. A healthy long term relationship is built on 2 or more (I ain't judging) individuals that stand as their own person and chose to be with the other/s. They don't necessary have to have the exact same interests or likes. What they do need is to love, respect, trust each other and understand that part of that is allowing your significant other to do what they love, even if it means doing it without you. Even if it means doing it with someone else. You all know where I'm getting with this right? Going out with others, travelling with others, drinking with others, spending time with others, choosing to spend time alone without your significant other, none of them diminish from your relationship if indeed it's building blocks are solid. And brace yourselves (well, those that are in long term relationships know this already...), but all of the above actually helps maintain your relationship. Can make it better and stronger.

I've been lurking a little on SM, even while away, only to find that once again, or should I say still (surprise surprise... NOT) there are those that are doubting the bond that these two young men have. It's solos and cultists trying to create an alternative universe in which JK and JM are not close and even distanced (some would love for them to actually hate each other - good luck with that psychos). Or it's once again those insecure 'Jikookers' that seem to need that constant affirmation from a real life queer couple that most certainly will not be giving them that. I keep asking myself why is it that a couple like JM and JK need to constantly prove they are together (all while they actually can't come out and say it due to their circumstances - industry and society they live in), when a heterosexual couple, say Zendaya and Tom, for example, are not expected to? How come a blurry clip (which I still say is fake) released at a very suspicious point in time, together with other obviously edited clips and serious claims of misconduct that are clearly made up and were intended to cause JK harm, have more of an impact on them than years and years of interactions, talk, actions (including just before the clip was released and after it as well)? And now another blurry clip that people are going all crazy over. Like seriously, what is wrong with people? Is the lack of content driven them mad? No drama so we need to create it? Well, thing is that when you are in a healthy committed long term relationship there is not much drama. That's the way it is when you are settled and happy and know who you are and who you love and know that they feel the same about you. Arguments, disagreements, bad days - sure. That's life. But at the end of the day if people want drama they should go watch one on TV.

So, how do I put it to make is as clear as possible?

These insecurities we get from some of the fans, they work like clockwork. Every single time, in the past, when we didn't get much from the two there were these whispers and question marks regarding their relationship. Not even if they are still together, but down to the core of their bond, as to even question if they are close or friends. This phenomenon goes way back.

But since end of 2021 beginning of 2022, when they were on their break and later the hiatus into 2023 it blew up like a full on hydrogen bomb.

This got worse after they were assigned their own 'personal' IG accounts and went on their break.

The misconception by many that these accounts were somehow their private accounts that they use to interact with each other, I can't call it anything other than delusional. Sorry not sorry. And if people did not realize that themselves if only from the lack of posting or interaction with whoever, then we had the members themselves telling us that they regularly interact within their own private chat groups. That photos shared on IG with us have been previously shared with the others in those groups. These IG accounts were created to maintain contact between the members and their fans, knowing that the group is going into hiatus and that they will each be promoting their own individual solo projects. Yes, the group Twitter (X) account could be used for that, but there was an attempt to create a more 'personal' connection between each member and Army. These accounts were work, as simple as that, and them reacting to other members or talking with each other through these accounts was not an indication what so ever to whether they were in touch or not otherwise.

At the time, back in early 2022, when people were reeling over the lack of interaction between the two on their IG accounts I tried to explain that a. not seeing something most definitely does not mean it's not there (something those two made sure to prove time and time again over the past couple of years), and b. that the lack of interaction can actually be an indication to them spending most of their time together, as there is no need to comment on another's post when you are right there to tell them whatever it is you want to tell them to their face. Not to mention, and this part is all me, so take or leave it as you will, but some of said IG posts, well, how do I put it? I guess I just say it as it is... some of these photos posted were either taken by the other or they were right there or really near by when it was taken. There. I said it. In any case, the fact that these were the only two not to interact with each other in front of Army's face, out of the whole group, that, to me, meant they were the ones spending most of the time together.

Oh, and let's just address the whole fanservice stupidity surrounding those two once and for all.

If they were all about fanservice, how is it that since that during the break in 2021-2022 and then during the hiatus and their solo endeavors, we were robbed of said fanservice? Wouldn't you expect that the fanservice couple, the scripted couple, be pushed during each other's promotions? How is it that we have seen during these periods of promotions every single other coupling other than JM and JK. Even JK visiting JM during his rehearsals was heavily edited. How come, if we are being sold a fake bond? No JK being forced to go visit JM when performing at the music shows. No JM being forced to do the same with JK. JM paired with Suga for an add for Busan (? that one was really an odd one for me). When did we see them? So yeah, people can scream fanservice all they want, but deep down inside they know it's a crap claim. I won't even go into JK's lives. There was not one ingenuine bone in his body, and that excitement seeing JM's comments, that coquettish behavior while interacting with him (especially during the bed live, OMG!!!), the reactions to the JM centered content he CHOSE to watch during those lives, none of that is scripted nor acted. It's all JK. All him. And JM's reaction when JK shows up at his documentary viewing live, that little butt wiggle in his chair (reminds me of Bam when happy to see his dad/s, as shown by JK), the face lighting up, the genuine worry on his face talking about JK working hard (during another couple of lives), again, not faked.

So yeah, not fanservice.

I digressed, I think.

Let's get back to 2022 why don't we?

On their break these crazy stories of heartbreak and breakup and hate and suffering and god knows what, only all to be thrown out of the window as soon as we got to see the two together again during the Seoul concerts and then LV. Oh LV. That was a wild ride.

Then BTS went on hiatus and the solo era began. And we were getting less and less ot7 content, and once again the insecurities. These ups and downs (you know, the whole JITB party stories about them not being together - that was countered by the BTB that followed a while after), then Busan concert's high, then 2023's downs and ups and downs and ups and fruck it all, I'm sea sick from this stupidity.

Same exact stories were repeated in 2023!!!

Especially after THE CLIP "which shall not be named" dropped.

SAME EXACT TO THE T STORIES!!!

But again, I digress.

Insecurity regarding the two and their bond (seeing they aren't in the public eye) followed by realization that everything is as it was (if not even better and stronger) once we see them together again. And the reason we don't see them together while on break... wait for it... is because they are a private couple living their everyday life, not for the cameras, not for Army, but for THEMSELVES.

Who would have thought.

And when they are together, as in working together, either filming or shooting or performing, well their bond can't be hidden, as much as they might have to wind it down at times (which is mainly not when they are on stage hyped up on adrenaline, lol), seeing that this is still Kpop, with fandoms that feel ownership over them, not to mention them being a queer couple. You know. All the usual reasons.

This idea people have that these two owe us something. That they constantly have to prove their bond, their connection, their relationship. What utter bull.

Anyway, what a slap in the face (for some a good wake up call, for others a well deserved one) the news of them choosing to enlist together was for so many.

Bottom line is, repeated for the millionth time, that these two young men have shown us time and time again that when push comes to shove they will chose one another!!!

I feel like I'm all over the place here. Came to talk about my trip and ended up talking about fanservice and insecurity and god knows what. I guess it's the jetlag (yeah, let's go with that and blame it on the jetlag).

In any case I will go with my favorite saying as of late:

Why this whole long word vomit, you may ask (or you might not ask, who knows, lol)?

What the hell does this have to do with my trip?

Nothing...?

Probably, lol.

But I am going to try to connect the dots. Even if they did make sense in my mind when I first started writing this post and no longer do...

How about the fact that the two chose to take these trips together?

See how I did that? Connecting the unconnected?

Not even going to ask the egg-chicken question here, as I am quite positive it was always about the trips and the show/content for army was the excuse that allowed them to travel 'for work', and a little bonus of content for army when they are away - not to mention perhaps even an opportunity for a soft outing, who knows.

They wanted to spend this time together before enlistment.

We know of at least 3 trips. Connecticut, Jeju and Japan (the Jeju trip may or may not be part of that 'show').

We are yet to know what exactly this 'show' will be. Will it be an actual show, style BV or ITS? Will it be a Vlog? Will we be getting actual episodes or several minute clips? But one thing for sure. Whatever we get, it will be a drop in a lake of the time they spent together. They went on these trips to be together. They shot this 'show' to allow them to be on these trips. This 'show' will give us a glimpse, no more than that, of what they got up to while together. Bottom line - it's about them, not the show and definitley not us.

So yeah, tripping together (lol, as in traveling, just felt like using that fun word, which can mean so much more as well) is something couples love to do, and going on said trips prior to a huge life changing event (let's be real here, going into the military for 18 months, especially knowing that to be able to enlist TOGETHER, they will be placed in one of the harsher units and environments, knowing that even though they will be together they most certainly will not have the freedoms they enjoy prior to enlistment), well that is something they would do as well.

To sum this whole rant up:

I came here to show off some pics from my trip...

If Jikook are allowed to (and god help them all if we don't get that show eventually...), then so am I...

The scenery...

And the wild life

So there you have it.

I managed to talk about my trip and about Jikook all in one long ranty post.

To those that managed to work their way through it I have this to say:

#jikook #kookmin #minkook #jungkook #jimin #jk #jm

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zanarkandfayth · 1 month

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Would love to read your answers to questions 3, 9, 13, 17, 18, 26, 29, 31, 32, 50, and, if there's another number (or several) you really wanna answer, please add those too ✨

thank you for the ask!! <33 I wrote you novels in return gjdskglj

3. In your opinion, what’s your best fic?

oooh this one is so hard because I love most of my fics for different reasons, even my older ones (at least the ones on ao3. we ignore the ones left behind on ffnet lmao). hhhh, of completed ones that are posted, imma have to say monsters honestly, because damn did I put some heart into that. but the one I'd probably consider absolute best is the still ongoing, not yet posted 600K+ beast of a fic I usually refer to as "nanofic" that I've been working on since 2019. it won't be everyone's cup of tea, but it just gets so deep into noct's trauma that I inflict on him and his slow recovery from it, more than I've done for any other fic, and I've poured so much blood sweat and tears into that thing, it's kinda everything to me.

9. Have you ever written for a fandom without watching/reading/playing the source material?

written, no. been tempted to in the past, but it was too much effort and I already had too many fics for my main fandoms. I have read fandom blind for both harry potter and supernatural in the past though, like lates 2000s into mid 2010s. both were kinda on accident. supernatural in particular is because it kept getting crossed over with MULTIPLE of my fandoms. psych, house md, and criminal minds. so I started reading non-crossover supernatural fics in self-defense gsdklgjdks

13. What’s the biggest change between your style when you started in fandom and today?

I mean… this is the first paragraph of one of my fics from my first fandom when I was fifteen. you tell me 😂

"Relena smiled as she sipped her tea and mentally reviewed the day's schedule. 8:00 am- peace talk to the world. 10:00 am- conference with Romefeller. 1:00 pm- try to convince Dorothy to become a pacifist because she was to stupid to understand that Dorothy loved war. Rest of the day- annoy the HELL out of Heero Yuy. Smiling happily again (PLEASE! Her smile is SO annoying), she stood up and was just about to take a step when …. suddenly a freak falling cow killed her!!! =^.^= The gundam boys all burst out of closets around the room and rejoiced."

the biggest change is probably that I actually write well now lmao. and don't character bash. and don't throw author's notes and emoticons in the middle of fics, and have learned to format better, and, and…

17. In your opinion, what’s your most overrated fic?

oh god. let me hide before I answer this. hands down, it's shadows growing. like let me be clear, it's not bad by any means. I'm still fond of it. but I did not have a clear plan when I started writing it, and I really feel like that shows. it was not meant to be a fix-it fic. it was not meant to be a longer fic. it was not meant to be much of anything, tbh. I saw the prompt on the kink meme and the prologue literally started writing itself in my head and I was like "nah idk what I'd do with that" and I scrolled past, but I couldn't focus on reading other prompts and so I went back and just started typing the fic in a reply to the prompt. honestly I figured I'd write whatever I could and then when I left it unfinished, no one would know because I was anon and I had like one fic posted on ao3 for ffxv at the time and I was used to being a complete fandom nobody. the fact that shadows growing got me even somewhat noticed was unexpected and I was not prepared gdjskgjdskl

it definitely affected the fic because once the readers started picking up it made me feel suuuuper stressed and I was so afraid to stray too far from canon because I thought people would hate that??? for some reason??? no there's logic there. I was just overwhelmed. and I do get why people love it, because the whump and the friendship between the boys is really good. but I cannot help but look at it and remember how out of my depth I felt at the time and wish that I had been brave enough to diverge more from canon and smart enough to come up with a better ending. I still suspect there were quite a few people who felt let down by the ending and that's fair honestly. anyways, yeah, it's a good fic and I'm fond of it and most of the attention and the recs it got were in the first couple years of the game being out and I don't begrudge it being my most popular fic, I just. have better ones now I feel like gjsdgjskgsj but maybe not ones as many people would want to read. which is fine with me tbh.

18. What’s your most underrated fic?

the gladio oneshot in my "fayth's daddy issues week" series! (I wrote all those fics so back to back that I can't remember the titles for any of them whoops.) I adore that fic and it got so little attention compared to most of the other fics in that week, or my fics overall tbh. the only one that got even less was the one about iris 🤣 but I don't care much for the iris one either, even though I think it has some stellar banter between the boys and cute/funny prompto/gladio moments. I really love the gladio one though, because it was fun to revisit gladio's pov in a fic and I got to develop a bit of backstory for him that's been evolving into headcanon and there's a good chunk of ignis and gladio friendship that was the precursor to all their friendship in monsters, plus I got to make gladio cry, so. I love it <3

26. What aspect of your writing do you most enjoy to see praised?

characterisation, for sure. it's the one thing I agonise over and actually worry about what readers might think at times, especially as I get further away from having played the game to keep it fresh in my mind. so anyone commenting that it feels right makes me roll around on my bed in glee. the other aspect I equally enjoy is people commenting on the emotions. like, that the ones I wrote the characters having feel real/deep, that it made the reader feel them too, etc. stuff like that. cos the emotions are literally why I write fic lol.

29. Does the division of your writing across fandoms line up with your reading? What’s the biggest discrepancy?

I am dumb and am struggling to understand what this question is asking, tbh. is it like, do I write for as many fandoms as I read, or something? because fuck no in that case, haha. the only fandoms I've done major writing for (more than one or two fics) are gundam wing, digimon adventure, final fantasy x, and final fantasy xv. and I've read for something like 100 fandoms, idk. at one point I had a list but I stopped keeping track eventually.

31. Who’s the one character you’ve just never managed to get perfectly right?

well… I didn't really understand the concept of characterisation for fanfic until a little before I started writing for ffx. so uh, it's kinda non-existent in my gdw and digimon fics. but once I actively started trying for it… honestly maybe just yuna from final fantsy x. I had some things featuring her meant to be longer fics that were set during the game (most of my posted stuff is set pre-canon, with no yuna in sight) but I never finished and/or posted them because I always felt shaky on yuna's characterisation. I don't think I've majorly struggled with anyone in ffxv to the point that I've felt too dissatisfied with characterisation to post. but at the same time I'm sure none of them are actually perfectly right xD but they FEEL more or less right to me, which is all I care about.

32. Who’s the one character who shines without you even trying?

noct. I mean. he's my blorbo for a reason xD my beloved, I relate to him so much and the rest of it I just project lololol. I make a point to not actually just write myself as noct, cos I personally ain't about that, but it feels very easy to write him without needing to think too deeply about his thoughts/feelings/reactions most of the time. they feel instinctual to me, even when it's something that would differ from my own thoughts/feelings/reactions if I was in a similar situation.

50. Has writing fanfic had a significant impact on your life? Would you say it’s entirely positive?

YES and the answer to this question is one of the reasons antis/purity culture upsets me so fucking much. it's a personal/sensitive answer though so skip if you don't want to read that xD but. reading rape/sexual abuse & aftermath fics as a teenager is what helped me to understand that, even though there was no outright rape happening, I was still being abused. seeing my favourite characters have the courage to tell someone about their abuse and get help is what encouraged me to tell one of my friends during an AIM conversation late one night when I was sixteen, and she convinced me to tell my therapist at my next appointment, who then told my mom, and yeah let's just say that was a very significant and eventually positive impact (it was a rocky road) on my life. if none of that had happened I genuinely think the CSA would have continued escalating into eventual rape. so thank FUCK for fanfic and I seethe with rage every time some shitfuck anti tries to claim there's no good to be found in such fics. plus in general it just helps with my mental health and I've made plenty of friends through fic over the years, even if they come and go I'm still grateful to have known them for that time, and writing fic is the one thing that gives life any meaning for me, etc. so yeah I'd say at least 99% positive.

and now, I will add a few to answer, because you said I could lmao

7. What’s the fic you most want to continue (unfinished or no)?

it is a toss-up between horizon road, an ffx fic featuring a toxic, fucked up relationship between tidus and auron that I still really love, or endless skies, a really self-indulgent digimon fic. they're both old at this point, horizon road I started in 2005, and endless skies was in 2016. horizon road suffers from me having no solid ideas for it beyond the three chapters I wrote, and endless skies is painfully fully outlined, but it was such a hard, research-intensive fic to write for a number of reasons, and now looking at it also just reminds me of an ex-friend who I feel very negative towards (because I talked to them a lot while plotting/writing and they even wrote some of the smut scenes for me, though I've since removed those) and even if I wasn't still deeply entrenched in ffxv, I don't think I could bring myself to ever work on it again :/ which sucks because I did adore it very much.

35. Have you ever written a ship into a fic without meaning to?

…okay, I think anyone who has read shadows growing and then has also read or even looked at my ignoct fics knows that the ignoct is very much present in shadows growing gjdskgjsk as much as I will swear up and down it's platonic, and people certainly can take it that way if they want, like. come on. it's there. at a point, it very much was intentional. BUT. it did start out accidental. the og prompt asked for either gen or OT4 and I don't ship OT4 so I was gonna do gen but noct and ignis kept blurring the lines when I started writing scenes with them gdsjkgdjkl aaaaand actually I didn't start monsters with the intention of it being ignoct either. (the ignoct bits in the first chapter I actually added in a rewrite of that chapter lmao.) nor the tiny little epilogue in heavy is the burden that nudges into hinting at ignoct territory. fuck, even the ignoct in my very first ffxv wasn't meant to be so overt as it was gjdsklgjks there's also tiny hints of it in some of my fayth's daddy issues week fics (not counting the one that's deliberately and stated to be ignoct).

…actually now that I'm writing this I'm realising very little of my ignoct has been deliberately planned at the start 😂 the sequel to shadows growing, grey skies, was planned, at least xD the promptio that shows up towards the end of the fic was an accident though gjsdkgljslk it just. happened??? I didn't even LIKE promptio when I started writing that fic. huh. maybe accidental shipping is just my thing in writing ffxv fics.

40. Do you feel like you put out enough content?

wanted to answer this one, because, I'm NOT talking in terms of other people here. I don't mean to sound dismissive or ungrateful, because I do appreciate the people who read my fics, it makes me happy, but like. it's not why I write OR post. I'm not "producing content" for people; if someone is unhappy with me for not posting more fics, that's their problem. but in terms of myself… yeah, I do wish I had more to post. not because I feel like I've got some kind of arbitrary quota to meet. like, quite frankly, I have over a million words of fic posted on ao3, and given that I have a single unposted fic that's over 600K alone, I'm positive I have at least 2mil total words written. it's just that I wish I could write more consistently/frequently? I feel like I never write as much as I want to, and I know a lot of it is because of my worsening health, so maybe that's why I just feel so frustrated and dissatisfied with my output, but man, sometimes I look at my number of posted works on ao3 and feel like it's such a low number for how long I've been writing ): both for ffxv specifically and for all my fics total. I know it's silly, but the feeling persists nonetheless.

thank you again for the ask!! I feel happy getting to answer questions and ramble about my fics :D and it was really fun to think about my answers and realise a thing or two haha.

#I assume most people use the auto-hide/click to expand long posts setting on tumblr now #but if you don't then rip your dash I guess #cos I don't wanna stick any of it behind a cut #I didn't mean for it to get so long though #I just cannot help but be wordy gjkdsgs #ask game #my fic

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frenziedslashers · 1 year

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I've had this imagine for a long time but I suck at writing and never know how to like kind of put it into words myself so I'll try and keep it short-ish 😭.

So it's based in s1 and it's Glenn's sister x Daryl (Daryl is like in his mid thirties and reader is in her mid twenties and one day she goes up to him maybe while he's in one of the trailers or in his tent (this is pre-rick grimes but during the beginning of the apocalypse when they're all in atlanta) and basically asks him if he wants to fuck cuz she knows neither of them have really had any kind of "release" (I hate the word so much but I couldn't think of another way to describe it) and he's like "are you crazy" or something like that and she says something like "way to let me down easy." But they end up sleeping together in his tent when merle is out on a hunt. And then it just kind of keeps going like that. Whenever they can get time to have sex, and know they won't get caught, they do it. And one day they're like kissing up against a tree and Glenn sees them and totally freaks out.

Dirty Secret;;

A/N: I really like this idea!! And don't worry if you can't keep them short-ish. I tend to ramble when I request stuff to people as well LMAO. Sorry if this isn't the best either. Been having a rough couple of weeks, but I still wanted to write something haha

Pairing: Daryl x Glenn's-Sister!Reader

Warnings: AFAB! Reader, She/her pronouns, PiV sex, Vaginal fingering, Oral (Male receiving)

TWD MASTERLIST || REQUEST INFO

No matter how much he denied it. He liked you.

Daryl hardly knew anything about you. He wished that was different, but it was so hard to talk to you. Let alone look at you. Every glance he would steal from you he'd be averting his eyes the moment you looked his way. His cheeks flushed a soft pink at the mere thought of you catching him looking at you. He felt weird. Like he was creeping on you. He couldn't help it.

It seemed like with each passing day he wanted to look at you more and more. When he would come back from his hunts he was looking for you in the small group of people. Asking his brother or anyone else who wasn't Glenn where you were.

"See ya got a thing for the Asians little sister huh?" Merle would ask, and Daryl would roll his eyes in return. The last thing he needed was his older brother teasing him. "Nah, jus' makin' sure she ain't out there dead," he scoffed. Merle knew better though. That knowing smirk on his face as he watched his brother stomp away from him. He knew he wasn't just a worried civilian. He was a worried guy hoping his potential woman wasn't out there dead.

Daryl would never admit to that, though. He hated the fact that he liked you. He wasn't even sure why. Maybe it was because you smiled at him anytime he looked at you. Or when he would come back from hunts you would congratulate him for the kills and always thank him for providing you all with food. Or maybe it was just because you were so damn pretty. He swore you were an angel or something. With how your smile seemed to make his chest clench each time he was lucky enough to see it. Plus, your eyes were so mesmerizing. He just wished he had the balls to talk with you.

Little did he know, you looked at him the same way. You looked at him with an expression that he didn't seem to catch onto. He never quite held eye contact with you long enough to notice. The way that you would watch him with such sweet admiration.

"Daryl," His body froze when he heard you calling his name. Anytime you said his name he swore you said it differently than anyone in his life ever had. With such kindness, and that voice of yours that could make him do anything.

Just last week Merle was on his ass about him doing anything you asked. You had asked him if he could look for some medication on a run he was going on with Glenn. You could have asked Glenn, but you asked him. So of course, he listened and went out of his way to find them.

"That girl got ya whipped and y'ain't even stuck yer dick in 'er yet," his older brother spat, and Daryl snapped. "Don' ya ever talk 'bout 'er like that again, ya hear me? She's better than that," and Merle just smiled and laughed at his baby brother's rage. "Pathetic."

When you got to where he was standing at his tent he snapped out of his thought. Shaking his head before looking down at you with a soft gaze. He didn't say anything, though. Just simply acknowledged that you were there by looking at you.

"Do you think I could ask you something?" You questioned with a raised brow. Daryl felt his palms clam up with how close you were to him. The fact that you were going out of your way to talk to him was mind-boggling to the archer. He nodded his head reluctantly, keeping his mouth closed.

You cleared your throat, eyes darting down to the ground. He was scared, to say the least. You'd never looked so nervous around him before.

"I see the way you look at me, and uhm.." you licked your lips and he felt his heart drop while he processed your words. "I think we feel the same about each other, do you maybe wanna..." You rocked back on your heels before mustering up the courage to say what you wanted to say. "Sleep together?" You nearly squeaked out, cringing at your choice of wording. You had thought of another way to phrase it earlier, but saying it to him was a lot different than thinking it. The first words that came to mind gushed out of your mouth like an idiot.

He was flabbergasted. It wasn't often that people could leave Daryl without something snarky to say, but right now was one of those moments. You were asking to fuck around with him? You, the pretty Rhee girl with those eyes and smile that made the archer's knees wobble? That had to be a joke. Glenn had to have set you up to this. Or Merle did. That had to be it.

"Look," you spoke up, seeing the gears turning in his head. "We don't have to, I was just figuring that since the apocalypse is among us that it'd be fun." You told him and he scoffed, "Plus your brother and my brother are gone on a run! It'd be the only time we really have to." You told him with a small frown, noticing how his scowl returned to his face.

"Yer crazy," he snapped, and you felt like you could crumble to the ground. "Merle put you up to this 'in't he?" He barked, and you shook your head. "No, I don't even talk to your brother, Glenn doesn't like how he looks at me." you frowned, and when he looked up and saw how to hurt you looked, he recoiled. He hated that he made you so upset, but this couldn't actually be happening. "Ain't happening, girl," he sneered, and you didn't think you could sink any lower.

You ducked your head down when he went to push past you. "Way to let a girl down..." you pouted, and he felt guilt course his veins. You were running off before he even had the chance to run past you himself. You practically dove into your tent. Your knees were brought up to your chest after the door was zipped. Hiding away from the world as embarrassment took over. You didn't care if it was still sunny out and the heat only seemed to make you bake alive. Maybe it'd put you out of your petty misery.

Daryl on the other hand resorted to the forest where he hid for what felt like hours. With the sun setting now, and how low the sun was before. It was probably only tinkering on one, maybe two hours.

He couldn't quite gather why you would come to him with such bold words. He always took you as someone too meek and shy to say something like that. Obviously, he was wrong. That was one thing you and your brother seemed to have in common. You both spoke your mind; regretting it would be a problem for later.

It wasn't like Daryl didn't think of you that way. Hell, he hadn't slept with anyone since well before the apocalypse began. He didn't have the time, and he was tired of sleeping with people that would leave him the next morning without a goodbye. He was tired of feeling so goddamn alone.

He wanted to find you and tell you how he felt, but he didn't know how. Daryl never knew how to express his feelings. Unless it was anger, disgust, distrust, or any negative emotion. It came to him like flying came to a bird.

He thought about you that whole time out there. The look of fear on your face when you asked. How anxious you looked when he didn't respond. Most of all, how saddened you look when he basically said no. It wasn't that he didn't like you. He just didn't want to like you too much. Daryl didn't want you to use him like every other person in his life. A part of him actually wanted you to be his girlfriend. A word foreign to him, but he was so eager to try.

He hadn't even noticed when he was heading back to the camp that his feet were leading him toward your tent. Both you and Glenn chose to sleep more on the outskirts of the camp. Daryl and his brother clear on the opposite end of camp.

Carol had seen the archer wander, and a small, knowing smile crept on her face. Hopefully he'd do something to give you something to gossip over while you, her, and the other girls did laundry. They gave you the idea of confronting Daryl, after all.

"You have to be blunt with men. Tell them what you want." Lori had told you earlier that day. "Just grab him by the face and kiss him!" Amy squealed, and you had shaken your head. "That's too blunt for Daryl," they all nodded at your words. You were right. Too much physical contact and he'd run. "Just tell him you wanna have sex, guys normally go for that. You can work it out from there." Carol told you with a kind smile, and you listened to that advice.

Now you were sulking and wishing you hadn't. If you hadn't then you wouldn't be in this mess. Too afraid that if you left the safety of your tent he'd be there. Just instead of catching him staring and bashfully looking the other way. He'd be glaring and looking at you like you were some disgusting cheap whore.

Your tent shook and you almost jumped out of your skin. A small shout left your lips before asking who was out there. "Jus' me, keep it down, gon'a have everyone over here," Daryl rasped, and you felt your body grow hot with embarrassment.

You didn't know what to say, falling silent while you coiled more into yourself. Your face hiding behind your knees while you chewed on the inside of your cheek. He did the same, standing there with racing thoughts. The hell was he even supposed to say?

"Hey, look, 'm sorry," he muttered, and you almost didn't hear him. "No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have thought you liked me like that, too," he felt his stomach flutter at those words. Oh, but he did like you like that. He hardly knew you and he liked you a lot more than he cared to admit. "Nah, jus' ain't used to pretty girls wantin' t'sleep with me." He admitted while scuffing his foot on the ground. Your heart lept in your chest.

"You think I'm pretty?" You asked, and he nodded. Until he realized the tent was still zipped up, meaning you couldn't see him. "Yeah, real pretty," he almost whispered.

You couldn't hide the smile that was on your face. You were glad that the tent was hiding you from his view. You were practically beaming with pride over his words. A little bit of the boldness from before sneaking back into your head.

"Did you want to come in and sit with me?" You had asked, expecting him to say no or call you crazy again after you did. Before you could overthink it too much you heard him shuffle around in front of your tent. The zipper let out a hiss as he pulled it up and around the door.

He put his crossbow inside first, crawling in after. The weapon was set to the side and off the blankets. You had even noticed that he set his boots outside beside your shoes. A small smile on your lips with how considerate he really was.

Once the man was inside and sat beside you it was quiet again. Neither of you knew what to do from here.

"That offer still up?" Daryl blurted, and the both of you were a little shocked by his words. You cleared your throat, the hunter looking over to inspect your face. You were flustered. He could tell by the way you tried to hide your face behind your hands while you rubbed at it. It made him smile at the fact that he could make you feel that way.

"Uhm, if you want to, I don't want you to pity me or anything," he chuckled softly at your rambling. "I ain't pityin' ya," he sighed, reaching out to brush his fingers along your jaw. Grabbing your attention so you would look at him. "You were right, I've been lookin' at ya same as you look at me," he told you with a lopsided smile, and you felt your stomach doing flips. He just wished he knew if you only looked at him with sexual attraction, or maybe more.

"Can I kiss ya?" he asked, and you felt your heart melt at the fact that he asked. You knew a lot of guys wouldn't ask. They'd just take what they want, but you could tell Daryl was different. It's one of the reasons you trusted him out of everyone in this small group to get some relief out of. Plus, a part of you hoped that something might stem from it.

When you nodded and told him it was okay he crawled over to you. His hand was on your jaw and he kissed you a lot differently than you imagined from the hunter. He was gentle, yet rough. A mix that you didn't expect from him. You had expected him to be all rough, nothing soft.

Once your lips were locked he was pushing you back onto the bed of blankets. His body climbed in between your thighs while he hovered over you and just kissed you for a while. You expected him to get right to business, but he took his time.

He was pretty nervous. He wasn't a virgin, he'd had sex a few times. Not enough that he knew what he was doing, though. He didn't have the charm that most guys had. He was awkward and over thought everything that he did. Plus, he hardly knew anything about peoples bodies, let alone the opposite gender.

He pulled back to lean down. Pressing a kiss to your jaw, then down to your neck. The scruff on his chin and upper lip tickling your skin. Smiling lightly at the sensation. A light giggle escaping your lips. The sound causing him to stop and look up at you. Blue eyes full of worry and curiosity.

"That tickled," you whispered, and he felt his heart flutter. He swore you were cuter than any girl he's ever met.

"Yeah?" He asked with a small smile. You only nodded back with a small snicker. Reaching out to run your hands over his chest. The action making Daryl suck his bottom lip in between his teeth.

The more you touched him the faster he wanted to get you both undressed. Though his hands were still shaky and clammy. Worried that he may end up doing the wrong thing.

His lips only kissed on your neck. He caught your skin between his teeth here or there, but nothing enough to leave a mark. The last thing he needed was Merle or your brother catching on. He knew Merle would just tease the holy hell out of the both of you. Glenn on the other hand, he was a little scared of how the younger man would react. Daryl knew best that family was important. Fuck around with the wrong family and a death wish may be in place.

His thoughts all came to a blurry stop when your legs wrapped around his waist. Pulling yourself up against him so your crotch met his own. The action pulling a moan from the both of you.

"Shit," he spat, nose nuzzling against your shoulder. "We gotta be quiet, darlin'," he gasped, and you nodded. Your head swimming with all sorts of thoughts. The fact that you were about to have sex with the man you had been eyeing for the past couple of weeks. The fact that you hadn't done this in what felt like years. And the fact that he was calling you 'darling'. You were in heaven.

"Can I?" he murmured, kissing your shoulder while tugging at the bottom of your shirt before he leant up to study your face. He couldn't get enough of your pretty eyes.

Once you gave him permission he was pulling your shirt over your head. Instinct settling into the hunter. He knew what he wanted, and knew how to get it. He just needed to know how to give you what you wanted.

"Tell me if I do anything wrong," he huffed out, to which you nodded. "You're doing great so far," you assured him with a chuckle. He didn't respond too much, though. His eyes were too fixated on your upper half. A bit of your own self-consciousness rushing through your body when he stared for a little too long.

His hands were quick to pin yours to the side when you went to cover up. Shaking his head while his eyes drug up your body to your own eyes. "Yer beautiful, none o'that." he stated, and you felt your whole body heat up with bashfulness. You wish you'd met him sooner, truthfully.

You nodded, agreeing with what he had to say. You probably agree with about anything the archer above you said. A small hum leaving your throat when he leant down to kiss your chest. He left soft butterfly kisses over your breasts. Soon leaving hungry open mouthed kisses on your mounds of skin. Licking and biting, gathering all the reactions that the hunter could spur from you.

"Like that, huh?" he growled against your skin when he began nipping on your left nipple. Flattening his tongue over the sensitive bud before he kissed over to the other side.

His mind was a bubbling mess of pleasure and nonsense. He hardly knew what he was thinking. Other than how perfect you were. He felt like he was worshipping an angel.

Daryl kissed further down to your stomach. Both of his hands removed from yours to explore. One hand rubbing and squeezing at your breast while the other reached down for your pants.

A grunt left his throat when you tugged at his locks of hair. Raising his head to look up at you. His pupils blown wide.

"Can you take your shirt off?" You nearly whispered, and he felt his heart sink. He almost said yes, but that familiar dread settled in. He didn't need you pitying him right now.

"I can't," he told you. He half expected you to question him, but you just nodded. You nodded with a smile. Reaching down to cup the side of his face with such care. "That's okay," you told him, and he swore he could have broken down into a weeping mess if it weren't for how horny he was.

He crawled back up and over you when you pulled him towards your face. The two of you sharing a look before he leaned down to lock your lips in another kiss.

His hand ran over the hem of your pants that you had changed into to sleep in. Running his calloused fingers over the soft fabric.

"Daryl," you whined against his lips. He nearly cursed in response at the sound of it. He only hummed in response. Refusing to part his lips from yours for too long. "Hurry up," you huffed.

Daryl smiled a little at this. He parted his eyes with a faint nod before pulling back from you. His hands quick at hooking under the hem of your pants and panties. Looking up at you to make sure everything that he was doing was all right. Tugging the clothing down your hips and then thighs.

You listened as he took in a sharp breath. Your eyes watching his face with caution. Making sure that he didn't look disgusted or like he was regretting to ever agreeing to do such things with you.

"Jesus," he huffed, and you shifted a little. "What?" You asked, and he shook his head while moving so he could pull your pants off the rest of the way. Tossing them aimlessly beside the both of you. "You're just a lot prettier than I imagined."

You felt your heart flutter at his words. Not only was he complimenting you, but he was also admitting to imagining what you looked like beneath your clothes. Was he thinking about you before this? Or was it only after you asked him if he wanted to fuck earlier that day?

He was quick to distract you from your thoughts again. Heat pooling in your stomach as you watched him tug his own pants down. You saw the reluctance in his movements. Your own hands reaching out to help him. Glancing up as if to ask if it was okay, and he nodded. Of course it was okay. It was more than okay, really.

The hunter pursed his lips as he watched you pull his pants down. Watching as your eyes danced over each sliver of skin that you exposed. The way that you licked and bit on your lips. Especially the way your eyes seemed to widen at the sight of him when he was finally free from his pants. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing, though. He only hoped your shocked expression was good.

"All good?" He blurted, cringing a little at his wording. He didn't entirely know what to say, though. "Daryl," he froze, waiting for you to finish. You were going to insult him, weren't you? "You're more than just all good, you're..." You pondered words, smirking as you helped him get the rest of the way out of his pants. Leaning yourself up in order to kiss his chest. "You're lovely. Words can't even express how handsome you are," you praised, and he felt his skin burn red. His heart leaping in his chest. Soft grumbles leaving his chest while you kissed over his chest. Lightly biting every so often.

His eyebrows furrowed when your fingers wrapped around his shaft. Hissing as your thumb ran over his tip. Allowing you to pull him back on top of yourself. "Shit, you feel so good," he murmured, kissing your cheek and then your lips.

Daryl brought a hand down to your own sex. His fingers running over your damp entrance. His body was buzzing with excitement. You could tell he was almost as nervous as you were, though. If not, maybe a little more.

His movements were slow and a little awkward. You let go of him in order to reach and grab his hand. Guiding and showing him what to do. Showing him where you liked to be touched the most, where your clit was, how to rub it. How to finger you. He was certain that by the end of the night he'd have you cum at least once. Or God smite him now.

He rubbed where you told him too. Watching with an intrigued gaze at how your hips bucked and rolled against just his hand. It fed his ego more than it probably should have. Smiling lightly when you began pressing frantic kisses to his neck and shoulders. The way your hips rolled, your hands pawed at his body, and most of all the way you moaned softly in his ear. It was enough to make him buck his hips against nothing.

"Daryl, please," you whimpered, and he felt his stomach do flips. There was no way you sounded so pretty. "Please what?" He drawled. His voice already deeper that before. "Fuck me," you gasped when his fingers curled into you once more.

He was shocked with how bold you were, but he wasn't going to deny what you wanted, either.

Daryl was quick to pull his hand away from your entrance. Replacing it with his throbbing dick. He wanted to watch you cum on his fingers, but that wasn't for now. Right now he needed to be inside you. He needed to feel you squeezing down on him while he fucked you into the stupid blankets below the both of you.

Once he was aligned he was looking up at you as if to ask if everything was all right. Your soft nod and 'yes' was all he needed to keep going. Pushing forward in order to slide into you.

His brows furrowed when the tip of himself was inside you. Pushing forward while huffing out breaths until he bottomed out in you. Your own face was scrunched. Reaching out in order to claw at his clothed back.

Daryl saw how uncomfortable you looked by your expressions. The man leaning down in order to pepper kisses on your lips and shoulders. "If I need'a stop, ya tell me," he grunted, and you nodded. "I'm fine," you told him, and he only nodded. He wanted you to know that if you wanted to stop at any time he wouldn't be mad. He'd stop.

Once you were comfortable enough you shifted your hips. The both of you inhaling sharply at the pleasure that shot through you both like bullets. "Shit, I might not last long," he told you, and you chuckled, nodding softly. "Feel that good?" you teased, and he let out a soft moan in response when you rolled your hips up. "Y'ain't got no idea, woman."

He started a pace that was a little slow at first. An attempt to savor the moment, but it wasn't long before the hunter was lost. His hips pulling back before snapping into you. He occupied his mouth with your own. The both of you doing your best to stay quiet. Thankful that the tent wasn't too close to any one else's since Glenn's empty tent was beside your own and then Jaques.

"Daryl," you mewled, and he nodded. "What is it?" He asked, his hand coming between the both of you to press his finger over your clit. Just like you showed him earlier.

He smirked when your back arched. You couldn't even finish your thought from earlier. Your head craned back. Leaving the hunter ample room to kiss and bite. It was hard to remind himself that he couldn't suck on your skin. A temptation that he wished no one would think anything of.

His thrusts only seemed to get rougher. The sound of skin on skin growing louder as he fucked into you. His fingers rubbing your sensitive bud a little harsher than before. Trying to get you to meet your high with him. Which was only growing closer for the archer.

"Shit," he mumbled against your skin. His free hand gripping your hip harder than before as his thrusts grew more sloppy and rugged. "God, 'm close," He hissed against your skin. To which you nodded with a choked mewl. "Me too," you cooed out, and it wasn't long before your body was coiling in on itself. The coil within your stomach snapping.

Your arms wrapped around his body. Your legs around his waist in an attempt to pull the man further inside you while you came around him. Daryl fought hard in order to not cum inside of you. It took everything not to. You just felt too good. The way that you squeezed and pulsated around him. The way your fingernails dug into his back through his shirt. And the way you whispered his name into his ear, over and over like a frantic prayer. A few more thrusts and he was pulling out of you, spilling his seed all over your stomach. He hadn't came that hard in God only knows how long.

The both of you laid there for a few moments. Daryl on his back beside you while the both of you tried to regain your strength. Both of you floating back down to earth. Slow, but sure.

"That was..." He started, searching for words. "Wow," he finished, and you giggled. Leaning over to press a kiss to his shoulder. "Think we could do it again, sometime?" You asked, and you were thankful you were looking over at the hunter. Catching his smile as he stared up at the roof of your tent. "Yeah, I'd like that."

It did happen a lot more after that, too. You were both as good as rabbits. Fucking anytime the two of you got the chance.

Daryls favorite was when you asked Dale if the both of you could take his Canoe out onto the water to "fish." Daryl did try and fish, the only thing you really fished was his dick in his pants.

He was oblivious when you offered to fish with him that morning, though. Only thinking that all you wanted to do was fish. He wasn't opposed to that thought, though. After sharing such an intimate moment with you the other night he liked the thought of spending actually quality time with you.

He wasn't exactly complaining when you slid down to your knees in front of him, either. He was telling you that you didn't have to. That if you didn't want to, he wouldn't be hurt. He never really thought he deserved head from anyone.

The moment you had your tongue on his shaft, licking up to his tip. He was a goner.

His head tipped back and his eyes fell shut with a groan. The fishing pole in the holder on the side of the boat while one hand gripped the seat and the other was tangled in your hair. With each bob of your head he fought the urge to thrust up into your throat. Not only did he not want to hurt you, but he also didn't want to move the canoe too much and tip the both of you.

"Fuck, like that," he purred, watching you through half lidded eyes. Practically melting into the seat of the boat while you gave him the best head of his life.

He thought about that morning anytime he had free time.

The both of you had quite the experience streak going on. Anytime the both of your brothers were away from camp you were in one or the others tent. Soon it wasn't even for sex. Some nights Daryl would just lay with you. Your head on his chest or vice versa. The both of you just lying in one another's presence. Some nights the both of you would swap stories. You typically did most of the talking, but he'd open up to you the more time that you both spent together.

"Daryl," you sighed as he trailed beside you. "I'll be fine out here by myself, we haven't seen any walkers this far out at all since we've been camped out here." You just wanted to go looking for anything. Whether it be a rabbit to kill and bring back to the camp, or maybe just something that was left out in the woods that could be used as something useful. You weren't exactly complaining that Daryl was acting so protective. It was nice. If it was your brother, you'd be throwing a fit and telling him to leave you be. Daryl following you like a puppy was a lot nicer. He didn't talk as much as Glenn, either.

"That's the thing, we ain't seen many up here, but we will," you frowned a little at his words. "So you're just going to follow me around like a body guard from now on?" You asked, and he shrugged. "Guess so." He told you, and you nodded with a chuckle. "Sure thing, Dixon," you sighed, reaching out to link your pinky with his. The hunter didn't argue, either. If anything it eased his anxiety more than just walking beside you. Now if he needed to he could pull you from harms way.

You slowed your pace, Daryl looking over at you with a brow raised. "Well, since we're out here." You stopped, and he turned a little to look at you a little better. "Do you think you could teach me how to work that crossbow of yours?" You asked, and he froze. It took him a moment to process what you were asking, but it wasn't long before he was smiling a little. Glancing down before looking back up at you. "You know how to shoot a gun?" He asked, and you nodded. "Glenn taught me." He nodded this time.

He led you over to a tree. Carving an 'X' with his knife before leading you so far back. "All right," he started, parting his feet so far while he held the bow in his arms. "Ya gotta make sure yer standin' right first. Gotta stand with yer feet so far apart or else yer gonna lose balance and fall on yer ass," He told you, and you nodded, watching as he brought the weapon up to aim. "Then ya just aim and shoot. Gotta just breathe." He finished before squeezing the trigger and firing. Looking up at the target where he hit a near perfect bullseye. Soon looking back over at you.

You reached your arms out for the bow that he offered to you. Smiling as you held it in your arms and struggled a little at cocking the weapon. Soon bringing it back up and into your arms. Raising it to eye level. "Like this?" You asked, and he chuckled.

You flinched a little when he put his hands on your waist. "It's okay, jus' me," He spoke when he felt your body jerk. Turning your hips a little and kicking your feet a little further apart. "Now bring the bow more here," He ordered. Moving the butt of the weapon more in the center of your shoulder. "Then just breathe," He told you, staying close while you aimed. Finally firing the weapon.

You lowered the crossbow in order to see where you fired. Daryl giving your waist a light squeeze. You peaked over your shoulder to catch the proud grin on his face before it mellowed into a softer smile. "Come on," he told you, leading you closer to the tree so the both of you could get a better look.

He whistled lightly, and you giggled. "Yer a natural," he boasted, and you rolled your eyes. "I wouldn't say that, I didn't even get a bullseye." You pouted a little, and he shrugged. "Nah, but you still hit in the x. You were close," he added in attempts to make you feel better. You did do exceptionally well for it being your first time shooting the bow.

You shrugged, looking up and over at the male with a soft smile. "Better luck next time," you told him, and he chuckled. The man was already looking at you. Your faces mere inches from each other. It wasn't long before he was turning to pull you in for a soft kiss. "Could practice some more." He told you before kissing you again. You just let out a soft laugh against his lips.

"Daryl! What if Merle or Glenn comes out here," you whisper yelled against his lips. He didn't care, though. "We're fine," he muttered, and you didn't argue anymore. Wrapping your arms around his shoulders while his hand not holding the crossbow came to pull you closer to him by your waist. "God, you're the horniest guy I've ever met," you teased him, and he chuckled. Pulling back to look over your face. "Yeah? Hard not t'be when I've got you here," He murmured, and you felt your skin grow warm.

You leaned in to give him another kiss. This time running your fingers through the hair on the back of his head. Which from what you've learned in the few weeks that the two of you had been doing this. Only seemed to get him more in the moment.

"What the hell's going on?" You both jerked away from each other when you heard a shout. The color draining from your face when you saw Glenn standing behind Daryl. A large stick in his hand that he was ready to hit the archer with.

You stood there for a moment, noticing the way Daryl backed away from you both. He did his best to show and tell Glenn that he didn't want any trouble, but you could tell by the look in his eyes that Glenn didn't care what Daryl had to say.

"I made one thing fucking clear to you all and it was to not fuck with my sister and here you are! What, did you think you weren't included in that statement?" Glenn shouted, and you shoved at your brothers chest. "Leave him alone, Glenn! I'm an adult, you've got to stop treating me like I'm still eighteen!" You barked with a frown. Your brother only glancing down at you for a second before he looked back up at Daryl.

"You stay away from her," This time you shoved at Glenn's chest harder. "Glenn Rhee, shut up!" You snapped, and Glenn shook his head. "Look, I'm not letting my sister last resort to someone like him!" He snapped, and you shook your head. Daryl shifted a little uncomfortably behind the both of you. Looking down at the ground. The mix of yelling and insults thrown at him making him uncomfortable.

"Yeah? Last resort or not, I wish I met him sooner," you snarled, and Daryl peeked up at that. He was about to walk off. He was worried that you would insult him next, but he was interested now.

"The hell do you mean by that?" Glenn asked, and you felt your hands grow a little clammy with a mix of embarrassment and anger. "He treats me nice." You told your brother, and you noticed the way his brow relaxed a little. "Really nice. Better than any guy before all this ever did. He treats me like I'm someone, and not just a toy. I like him and I'm not letting you scare him off, Glenn. I'd do anything for you! You're my big brother, but Daryl's not a bad guy," you told your brother with a slight frown. Trying your best to convince your brother that Daryl wasn't using you. Or at least you hoped he wasn't.

Daryl couldn't believe that you were standing up for whatever the two of you had going on. He was shocked to hear that he treated you better than any other guy you had been with. Either you had only been with one other guy, or you had as good of luck with relationships as he did.

He was just glad that you thought whatever the two of you had going on was as nice as he thought it was. It was the nicest thing he's had in years, honestly.

"Fine." You both looked at Glenn this time. Your brother meeting Daryls eyes. His glare settling back on his face. "But if anything, and I mean anything happens to you," He looked back to you, "And I find out it's his fault," He looked up at Daryl again. "He's dead." Glenn snarled, and you nodded. Reaching out to give him a hug with a smile. "Thank you, Glenny." He nodded with a sigh, returning the hug. "Just, stay safe..." He muttered in your ear, and you nodded. Pulling from your brother before watching him wander back towards camp.

"Does that make us something?" Daryl asked, taking a step closer to you. You froze at his words. Looking over your shoulder at the male. "What?" He shrugged. "You fought for whatever we got goin' on. We more than just a dirty secret?" He asked, and you brought your lower lip between your teeth. You shrugged, reaching up to rub your jaw. "I guess," he smiled softly. He didn't say anything more. He only motioned for you to follow him back to camp.

From then on, though. You and Daryl were practically inseparable. Especially since you didn't necessarily have to hide it from Glenn anymore. Merle was another story.

Daryl was far from touchy when it came to being around the others, but he was always right there with you. Whether it be standing by you, sitting near you, lying with you at night, or watching you as you talked to someone. He was making sure the others who got too close knew that you were off the table. He considered you his now, as he was yours. Whether you liked it or not. You were stuck with him.

More so, whether Glenn liked it or not.

Taglist: @ambassadortotrilliusprime @tuttifuckinfruttifriday

#daryl dixon twd #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon #twd #twd x reader #the walking dead #the walking dead fanfiction #the walking dead smut #the walking dead x reader

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happypopcornprincess · 2 years

Note

hi lovee your work<3 could you write a oneshot with bucky where the reader gets really really sick while bucky's on a mission and no one tells him so he gets worried and caring when he sees her. Just make it super fluffy with also some angst!!

omg, bro sure sure sure!!! Bucky is my sweetheart, my boo, my pretty boy I absolutely adore him.

In this fic, you get a lot of backstories, Steve and Tony being besties, Thor and Natasha being Y/N x Bucky shippers, lots of phase 4 references, my undying love for "Clueless" and nobody dies 😉😂

hope you like it <3

Things I'll Never Say

Pairings - Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader (Ft. The Avengers)

Premise - Words from the heart are sometimes left unsaid, but will they finally be expressed through actions?

Main Masterlist || Bucky Barnes Masterlist

If I could say what I want to say

I'd say I want to blow you, away

Be with you every night

Am I squeezing you too tight

Guess, I'm wishing my life away

With these things I'll never say

-Avril Lavigne, Things I'll Never Say

Avengers Compound

You sneeze for the third time that day as you open your door to reveal Buck standing behind it. He was ready in his gear and was puzzled by your demeanor.

“Hey, Bucky," you say, trying your finest to sound normal, but out came a croaky voice from your throat. It has been a hell of a night as you struggled with a stuffy nose and fever. You had no sleep and were sleepy as hell. You didn’t want the team to catch the viral fever so you stayed in your room.

“Hey, doll.” He smiled at you.

“Are you heading out on the mission?” you ask him, leaning against your door.

“Yes, we were just about to head out, I thought of checking up on you.” He copies you by leaning against your doorframe.

“Thanks. You’re coming in?”

“Nah, just passing by. You’re feeling alright? Banner told us why you dropped out of the mission.”

“Yeah, I’m fine now. It’s just a mild cold.” It hurt you lying to Bucky. You didn’t want him to worry and wanted him to focus on the mission. You actually thought your thermometer might be broken when it showed 104 (celsius) on it.

“Okay.” he nods

“Hmm.”

A comfortable silence falls in between you two, one you have become accustomed to. Bucky was a man of few words, and you never pushed him to say something. He lowers his gaze to his shoes, thinking about something. You wait, patiently.

“If you need anything... won't you let me know, Y/L/N?" he says.

You huff out a laugh “Yes, Barnes, I’ll let you know.”

The way you emphasize his last name made him laugh, and he looked you in the eyes. Despite being trained by secret agents and a literal Black Widow, Barnes always somehow managed to read you. In the same clothes you were wearing the day before, he watched your eyes, his sight unflinching.

He knew. He knew you were lying.

“Bye Y/N.” he steps away from your door frame.

“Bye Bucky” you wave sheepishly as he walks back through the hallway, lifting his chin and giving you a smirk. You blush a bit and close the door once he gets out of your sight, leaning against it and closing your eyes.

---/---/---/---/---/---

You have had this hopeless crush on one James Buchanan Barnes since the day you almost beat him in a fistfight in Germany. You were team Tony; and he was team Steve. You fought so hard, matching his fistfight style and speed that shocked him, you were trained by Natasha and Clint after all, the best of SHIELD agents. But you got distracted for one second and his body slams you on a table. As you groaned in pain, he gets up and says, “You fight well, good luck next time.” You couldn’t answer but mouth a “fuck you” and he walks away with a sarcastic smile.

Even after everything, you could not stop thinking about him. The soothing blue of his eyes, the way he almost seemed impressed by your fighting, and that smirk, God damn. You were not sure if you'd ever meet him again, given the fact that Tony hated his guts and you were on his team, you could not help yourself but fall into the rabbit hole of the lore of The Winter Soldier. You read his file, read everything you could find on him when he was brainwashed into doing things you knew no person would ever do willingly. And your heart ached for him, everything that he had to endure.

But you do meet him, almost two years after Germany.

In Wakanda, he was startled finding you there, and let out a small, “hi” which almost made you roll your eyes if it was not for Natasha and Sam engulfing you into a bone-crushing hug after not seeing you for years. Steve and Bucky made amends with Tony. All your friends that were torn apart two years ago, fought Thanos together.

And won.

You came back to the compound in New York, and everything fell back in place, just like it was before. Bucky and Tony made amends, and he was granted parole.

You didn’t talk much to him until you encountered him sitting by himself one night in the living area at 3 in the morning. You were about to sneak some late-night snacks from the fridge when you saw him just sitting alone, looking out the window. It was a different side of him, a shy and reserved man so drastically different from the one you encountered before.

Your friendship started when you wordlessly took a seat next to him and sat in silence for a long time. He finally turned to you and said, “I’m sorry about throwing you on a table.” Which made you say, “It’s alright. I’m sorry too, about my choice of words at that moment.” That made him laugh. And God was it beautiful. You could hear it all day and would never get tired of it.

You did listen to it, when you fell into this silent agreement of you joining him in the living room every night and sitting in silence, exchanging a word or two, or waking up splayed on the sofa with a blanket on you as he slept on the chair.

You never pushed him, and he opened up slowly. He told you about his life before he became the Winter Soldier, what he could remember. He told you how he could not remember the faces of his family, but bits and pieces of things related to them.

His sister tying her ribbons on his window to dry off, the smell of his mother’s food, his father’s watch that he would always forget before leaving for work, the sunlight shining through the alleys where he played with his friends, and so many other stuff.

You listened. Never interrupted. Sometimes even helped him to remember.

He never told you about his time in HYDRA, the horrific things he went through. And you understood the war that was still going on in his mind about whether or not was he guilty of it, or not.

You never felt this close with anyone before, not your previous boyfriends or your closest friends. He made you feel calm and at peace every time you were with him, unlike the anxiety and fear of rejection you have felt with others.

But the real question, as Natasha told you, still stands.

Would you let him know how you feel? Or not?

---/---/---/---/---/---

He climbs the ramp to the quinjet and looks around. He looked around as everyone was busy getting prepared for the long flight to another continent.

Natasha and Clint were already seated, in deep conversation whispering in Hindi. He could listen in due to his heightened hearing but he chose not to.

Tony and Thor were in the cockpit the former explaining to the latter not to summon lighting once they are in the sky, “...I do not want to explain to Fury why another one of his quinjet’s operating system is fried up because you chose to show Spiderling how your hammer works at 15000 feet up in the air.”

“I understand, Son of Stark.” He says with a not-so-reassuring smile on his face.

“Jesus Christ.”

He looks at the middle of the jet to see Sam and Steve, Captain America and Nomad, discussing the plans for the missions. He decides to join them.

“About time you showed up Barnes,” Sam glances at the holographic map.

“Nice to see you too Wilson.” He says as he stands next to Steve.

“And Wanda turns out, got married in secret and is currently on her honeymoon with Vision. She called Tony the other day to tell him she’s taking a leave for a few days.” Steve says, looking at Tony in an almost teasing manner.

“Where are Wanda and Bruce?” he asks, after noticing both were missing from the jet.

“Banner got a family emergency so he is headed to New York. It turns out his sister was also exposed to gamma rays and could transform into a hulk.”

“He’s got a sister?” he asks bewildered.

“Cousin,” Sam says.

All eyes turn towards Bucky as he realizes that he is suddenly the center of the conversation. “I… Yeah, she’s good.” He stammers out.

“I, of course, gave her a piece of my mind before congratulating,” Tony says as he joins the group, “given the fact I am her father-in-law and wasn’t even invited to the wedding.”

“That’s… well… you’ve got a point.” Steve gave up his reasoning with Tony a long time ago.

“So, how’s Lady Y/L/N? Thor asks, gathering around them.

"Is she well?" he asks.

How could he tell them that you lied to him? That at this very moment you might be in pain or suffering. And here he is, getting ready to go on a mission halfway across the earth, like an idiot. He looks up and realizes that everyone was still looking at him, waiting for a full answer.

"She's not well," Steve says in a calming voice. He could see right through him.

“She lied to me about being alright. I could feel her body heat standing five feet apart Steve, she’s not well.” He finally admits.

“Well then, go back to her,” Thor says.

“What?” he looks at him.

“It's an intel mission Barnes, we’ll be fine. Please be with your girlfriend. She needs you." Tony says.

Bucky looks at Steve. He smiles at him, a silent understanding saying ‘yes, go for it!”

Bucky instantly turns a dark shade of pink, “Uh, we’re not… I mean.”

“Wait, are you not courting Lady Y/L/N?” Thor sounded genuinely offended.

“No... I didn’t tell her I liked her.” He looks at his shoes, not being able to meet someone in their eyes. He feels someone squeeze his arm and looks in that direction. It was Natasha.

“There are six of us. And we got aerial support from the country’s Air Force. Go get your girl.” She smirked at him. “Hell yeah!” Clint cheers and everyone joins him.

He shouts thanks to everyone, slapping Steve’s back for good luck, and runs out of the Quinjet.

And just as he was about to go to your room, he got an idea, one that would cheer you up more than anything.

---/---/---/---/---/---

The door opened and in came a tall figure, holding all sorts of bags. You squinted your eyes to realize that it was Bucky.

You were in a dreamlike state, shifting in and out of consciousness and feeling dizzy. Your entire body was in pain, and your head was killing you. But then, you hear a knock on your door just when you decide to lean up on your elbows.

“It’s open, come in.” you sounded like a frog with the croak in your throat.

You laughed out loud. This was unbelievable. You knew Bucky always had a soft side and looking at this, you were witnessing the full force of it.

“Bucky?” you call out puzzled. "Yes, that's me." He answers, turning the lights on in your bedroom. Your room lit up as he kept everything on the table near your bed.

“I got you some chocolates and the multi-colored sour patches, some fresh fruits, vaporub, and…” he turns to you, holding an Ipad, “a shit ton of movies.”

“I thought you were on the mission.” You say, making space on your bed and scooting away to a corner. He takes the seat and turns to you, “It was an intel mission, half of the team is on it and they let me sit this one out.” Saying so he smiles, showing his pearly whites.

Up close, you could see the small wrinkles near his eyes and his scrunched-up nose. He looked like a really cute and cuddly bear.

“So, you want to spend the day with me?” you ask through your eyelashes, suddenly aware of your state sitting in front of him.

You were wearing an old pair of sweats and a hoodie you’ve had since high school; your hair was a mess and your room looked like it had been attacked by a tornado. Clothes, books, shoes everywhere. His eyes softened, realizing what you were thinking about. He quickly shoves the treats and the tab towards you, saying, "Pick any movie you like Y/N. I’ll be right here.” And he gets up.

He starts collecting everything that is thrown around the room and brings it to your bedside. "Bucky, you don't have to do this -" he gestures for you to stop.

“You can’t possibly think you can clean the whole room in that state. C’mon Y/N, let me do this. Your job is to choose a movie that won’t bore me to sleep like the last time.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault you don’t like ‘Me Before You'. I absolutely loved it.”

“It was sad.” He answers with a solemn tone, collecting the books and piling them on the table.

This time, you were sitting next to each other under the covers of your double bed. Bucky was leaning back on the headboard, his right arm slightly touching your fingers. You didn’t realize when but slowly your body was leaning towards his arm. You were feeling cozy and sleep was slowly taking over your body. And as Cher was plotting a makeover for the unpopular girl, your arm came in contact with his. “Damn, you’re so comfy.” You mumbled; your eyelids heavy with sleep, and you rested your head on his shoulder.

Your heart drops realizing that he didn’t like the story where the main couple did not end up together. So, you settled down for something funny and cute; Clueless. A movie Bucky loved instantly when you were introducing him to modern media.

The first time he saw it, the whole time he was saying, “Why do I feel like I’ve seen it before?" repeatedly. It wasn’t until you mentioned that it was based on a Jane Austen novel that he recalled reading it while hiding with Steve, Sam, and Natasha.

---/---/---/---/---/---

Bucky never focused on the benefits of being a super soldier, being part of the darker side of what the serum did to his body for most of his life. Therefore, he found it quite difficult to do so. But ever since you connected, he found some upsides too, his body was capable of doing some things the others couldn’t.

Like smelling your lavender shampoo from across the briefing room, getting goosebumps whenever you touched him, noticing the details of your face, the fine lines around your eyes that looked so damn beautiful when you smile.

And currently feeling his heart drop hearing what you said. He shifted his focus from the screen to your face, now much closer than it have ever been before, as it rested on his shoulder.

All his heightened senses were on overdrive as soon as you snuggled up to him. Your head rested on his shoulder as you held his arm in a hug.

You looked adorable, and he felt you relax, realizing how his higher body temperature might be relaxing to you.

He carefully closed the iPad, keeping it on the nearby table and clearing the bed as much as he could with you clinging onto his arm. He gently adjusted your body to lie back on the bed, and when he tried to go away, you held onto his arm, murmuring, “don’t go” in such a small voice his heart melted.

His mind flashed back to all the times you silently slipped into his room after hearing his cries through your bedroom walls. How you got under the covers and held him as he slowly fell asleep.

—-/---

He smiled a small smile and lied next to you, covering you and him under the blanket, and as you snuggled closer to him in sleep, he placed a gentle kiss on your forehead and fell asleep, the nightmares staying away this time, as you held each other in silence, at peace.

A/N - Thank you everyone for sticking with me till the end of this fic! if you liked it please let me know through the asks and the comments. Any and all requests, headcanons, and drabble requests about this AU is mostly welcome. Love y'all, Take Care!

Requests are open! Feel free to request anything.

Tag List:

@tuiccim @parkjammys @akinrawsx @asteph22 @iamthebeth @thefandomqueenuno @onlyhereforthefics @yikesdameron @savedfanfics1992 @amigaytho @hoeensficrecs @samwilson-mylove @xbuchananbarnes-deactivated @jenniweaslee @anna-phora @fluffyprettykitty @ladiesluver

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evilwickedme · 11 months

Text

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you for tagging me <3

How many works do you have on ao3?

69 lmaooo

what’s your total ao3 word count?

407,178 which is. A lot

What fandoms do you write for?

My current main fandoms are DC comics and marvel comics, but I've also been writing a lil btvs. Historically I've written a fuckton of Harry Potter, The Witcher (TV), a decent amount of leverage and daredevil (TV), the raven cycle, all for the game, and a few other fics in some random fandoms

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

before we get married, I need to get permission from batman; hang on til the chaos is through; in which an entire university becomes far too involved in Pankratz and Vengerberg's love life; This is all just HR paperwork waiting to happen; and The Sound Of My Own Voice (Asking You To Stay)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond to every single comment, with exactly one exception, that absolutely haunts me. The person just kept replying to me no matter what I said and I couldn't make them stop

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending

Mornings, for sure. One of my first ever spideypool fics back from 2016. Peter dies at the end. know we're not together (but I won't forget you) is a close second though

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh I don't know, I have a lot of happy endings but they usually follow a fuckton of angst. Maybe in which the daily planet staff are 100% convinced that the kent-lanes are fucking superman, but I wouldn't call that a traditional ending

Do you get hate on fics?

Nah, although I've had some unnecessarily harsh public bookmarks

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Oh yeah. My first ever smut sucked but then I wrote so much in 2021 for the witcher that I actually got pretty good at it, or at least as mlm sex. I have some body dysmorphia issues around vaginas and I never feel like I write that well. Anyway I tend to go for excessively sweet or incredibly kinky and borderline unhealthy fics

Do you write crossovers?

Only the buffy/jason fic, unless you count daredevil tv and marvel comics or itsv and marvel comics to be crossovers

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not as far as I know

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes!! It's incomplete unlike the original fic but someone translated most of I'm a mess (but I'm the mess that you wanted) into Russian. This wasn't the question but @flowerparrish also podficced the first chapter of my jaybuffy fic!!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes but I removed it from my page following an extremely brutal and somewhat traumatizing fight with some of the people I was cowriting it with

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Mmmm I don't know, that's a good question. For a long time I would've answered jily. Spideypool is probably the main contender now, although spuffy could give it a run for its money - despite the fact that I've only written one fic for them (and implied them in my jaybuffy fic), I've adored them since I was 13, which is. Over 12 years ago fuck

What’s a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Mmm I'm always hoping I'll finish my wips, but the ones I doubt the most are my yennskier fic (no progress in over a year), my literati fic (although I did make some progress about a month ago), and I don't plan on going back to my drarry Hogwarts professor au for obvious reasons

Edit: OH ALSO the Witcher s2 outsider pov is never ever getting finished I'm sorry I know I promised it to a lot of people in the comments but it's not gonna happen

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and characterizations imo

What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions my fucking God I struggle so much with them

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I'm fluent in Hebrew and my first ever fic was in Hebrew, so if that came up I'd feel pretty comfortable with it. Anything else I'd have to approach someone who spoke the language, and I'd rather just write it in English and say it was in the other languages

First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter and again, it was in Hebrew. I recently described what it was about to a group of friends who called it, and I quote, "adorable". I was ten or eleven at the time and I do not plan on reposting it.

Favorite fic you’ve written?

That's a toughie. I think probably I'm a mess (but I'm the mess that you wanted), but Under the Pink Hood, Of Three Times Lily Evans Changed Her Mind About James Potter, and know we're not together (but I won't forget you) are all honorable mentions

I'm not a tagger - I usually don't even participate in these kinds of posts - but I guess @not-the-blue @supergirlboy @penny-anna and any other mutual or even follower are invited to participate if you wanna

#this my fic #gail speaks

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bathoarchives · 8 months

Text

On The Rise: A Conversation With Tefoffline

Tefo Kosie best known as Tefoffline is a 20-year-old rapper, producer, and upcoming mixing engineer from Kanye, Ga Maila.

With the release of his mixtape 'Tomorrow Might Be Too Late' last December, he has further solidified his place as one of the most exciting new-age rappers in Botswana.

Where did you grow up?

Well, I moved around a lot when I was growing up you know. Initially born in Kanye, I lived in Gabs for a good 8 years before moving to Mahalapye for like a year or so. Then I came back to the south, living in Molepolole for 4 years before moving to where I live now which is somewhere around the city.

How did you get into music?

I think I've always had a musical inclination from a very young age, mostly because of the music my parents was bumping. I was like 4 or 5 when I used to go into their room and play Michael Jackson and Johnny Mokhali CDs. In terms of Rap and Hip-Hop records, my uncles put me on man. During school holidays I used just get dumped at their places and these dudes was playing a whole lotta rap shit at the time. You know your Lil Wayne, Nicki, Drake and Rick Ross, those are the 4 niggas who properly introduced me to this Hip-Hop stuff. In terms of my rapping, I wrote my first ever rap at 9 while living in Mahalapye. But what had urged me to write a verse was the fact that me and my friends at the time had a thing we did after school where we'd rap and just talk about Hip-Hop stuff for hours on end before we all went home. We used to do like other niggas verse's you know like the stuff that was popular at the time and really just stuff we liked until one day i decided to surprise these dudes and rap my own shit that I wrote. It went as well as expected and I been kickin it since.

How did you come up with the name Tefoffline?

I went on a long ass sabbatical in like 2021 just to get off social media and get my mind right and tbh, that was most amount of work I did, music-wise and just life-wise. Basically, thats where it came from. I felt like I worked better off my phone and the internet as a whole, so I just merged that with my name. It just took me back to how I used to make music before I encountered phones and shit. Back then it was just my imagination, pen, and diary, and I was the most efficient working under those conditions. I think I was going through a name change type situation at the time and I just didn't want a regular name that everybody had or some typical white man's name like nah. I needed to bring it home as well. I like that I included my real name in there because it just added to the authenticity. Real shit.

When did you start releasing music?

I only started dropping music in 2021 and to be honest anytime I think about it I can't help but laugh. I was in the kitchen one morning at like 9am and I was like 'Yo kana I did this other joint yesterday, maybe I should drop it, and I did and it went crazy. I think that when I really decided to go all in after seeing all the good things everybody had to say about my shit.

How would you describe your style of music?

Right now I won't lie i'd say I'm making some real stoner music. Like stoner anthems fr but seriously I'd say it's like a mix of alt-rap with jazzy elements and the truth really. That's what I describe it as because it's really music about my life you know, the ins and outs, ups and downs, the weird shit, everything. I look at it more like confessions in a way.

What inspires the style of music you make?

A whole bunch of things tota. I like music combinations and rhythms that aren't conventional. The regular shit is hard as well but I never really wanna limit my references. Niggas like MF DOOM, Earl, and MIKE been inspiring and continue to inspire the music I been making to this point. If you look closely, all these cats have a thing in common: they produce and rap. So that's the school I came from. Tota hela anything goes with me. I'm a big house music fan as well so I'd say that inspires my shit too.+

What inspired your recent mixtape?

Life has a funny way of showing you who the boss is. I guess I was just going through that shit and decided to document it. Like I said I see it as billy would say, Truth Rap, so for me it was an easy thing to write the records. The hard part was outgrowing the tracks. It's like you can't get that first feeling on a track you've been working on for 2 years so it took me a while to get it done but all in all it was a good experience man. I went through some stuff and if you listen to the music you'll hear it. Everything is on the music.

How was the process of creating it?

Man, it was like any project to be honest. It's like you develop a new love for creating and you're almost always excited for the first few months. But then it becomes routine and it gets mixed up with other bad routines in your life prompting you to try to escape or change that. I ain't gonna lie that shit got me off course for a good while. Just focused on living my life. Writer's block became a hassle at a point and I was nearly like 'F this' but you know, that's how it be. I really had fun man but truthfully I've been over that project for a good while.

Vocal layering seems to be a common aspect in a handful of your tracks..would you consider that a part of your signature sound?

Yeah definitely. I used to make tracks without adlibs and backings cause I had a different perspective on what music should sound like. But you know, with time, you grow and learn and I just decided to incorporate all that into the records. I really love music with good backings and adlibs, not even just rap, so it was more of an 'I'm making the shit I like to hear' type of vibe. That's just how I move with my music. I know what I want in terms of the sonic direction, so I just do it myself. Even with the latest project where that kinda thing is prominent, I knew how I wanted it to sound like 2 years ago. I just had to practice and implement that knowledge.

Is there anything you're doing apart from rapping?

Yeah, I'm a student currently about to get my bag, soon. I do a little music journalism for my school magazine focusing on music, but besides school, I have a couple of business ventures I plan to implement, especially this year. I'm a business dude at heart, even though I never studied it. I've always loved the fact that you could make money from your own ideas on your own terms, so I won't dwell too much on that but yeah. I also recently started officially heading a little label imprint called 4EVAFADED, which comprises the people responsible for the success of my tape and my music in general, my niggas idyllicsoul and Rxssi on production, as well as fellow rapper NovSon who's a young MC trynna make moves as well. I'm what you call a Renaissance man in a way, I just have a little trouble with laying out all the pieces because it gets messy.

Any local acts that you find exciting?

There's tons; I wouldn't even know where to start. My favorite rappers right now would have to be Nikky Dymondz, banzai, Jesonyana, Chrysus, OneTake 267, and my boy NovSon just to name a few. In terms of singers and vocalists, I have been messing with that Magadi single (Backseat Headrush), Sebaga got some really cool-sounding projects, Fourteen'O'Six is hard af, Courtney got that one track, and how could I forget spacerover and Chubbs (Lucas Chubbs). Oh I fuck with Pablo and Xortic as well. Them niggas is crazy like I won't even say much, but I'm sure I'll be able to experience most of these artists because I was privy to meeting some more amazing acts last year. So maybe my list will change in a few. I just had to give you a few because I can't really think of some right now, but I'm a huge fan of local shit. It really is my bread and butter.

Any thoughts on where the music game is going?

I really think everyone is getting to do anything they want especially sound-wise. I feel like we're not confined to doing what pleases labels or whatever so it's more of a whole group of niggas just making music they really mess with not because they have to make that stuff. So I think you know, with that kind of freedom, the landscape changes over time. I also love the fact that dudes like Saigo (saigotheeditor) have been able to do the photography stuff and shows to basically accompany the music, practically building aesthetics for the sonics, so a big shout to my guy Lerroy, that's my guy.

Do you have anything you're working on right now?

Yeah most definitely, but the stuff I'm making right now I wonder if they gon' like it, because it's some weird shit man. That's all i'm going to say for now. Oh! and I did a couple of features that I hope will be out this year with some amazing artists. Sometimes I don't even believe I did that but you know, I did.

Speaking of features, you are featured on 'The World Is Yours' by Nov Son, how was the experience of working on your first collaboration?

It was really cool. One of the easiest and laid back collabs I did. He hit me up and was like 'We need to get in the studio' and I was down fr. My nigga Idyllic was working with him as well, so it just made things easier but yeah he was recording some songs from his upcoming album and we knocked a couple out the park. Watch out for that project btw. That was also when I met my nigga Rxssi; they was moving as a unit back then so I just decided to mess with them and what they did because normally I just keep to myself and do shit on my own or with like 1 or 2 of the homies. It's a very personal thing for me. People probably think I hate collabs or something, but they're so hard to get done because of the different mindframes, schedules, and shit but I always try to make sure I work with other artists because I believe we work better together.

Stream Tefoffline HERE

Instagram: @Tefoffline

Facebook: @Tefoffline

#tefoffline #bwarchives #artist interview #botswana

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aintgonnatakethis · 11 months

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Thanks for tagging me @judgeverse ❤️️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

108,855, almost all of that coming from this year as I spent the last few months of last year getting back into writing by telling myself 'I'm just going to write. I won't post, so I don't need to worry how good they are'.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stargate Universe because those guys are in my brain and I'd die for them, but my next fic I'm posting is going to be Stargate Atlantis. I also have 2 WIPs from Durham County as my brain went 'hey the SGU fandom is pretty small... You know what would be really funny?'

Back in the day on ffnet (*checks* 15 years ago jesus christ!) I wrote for Doctor Who, Torchwood, Star Trek: TNG, Blakes 7, Invasion, X-Men: The Movie, Demons, House, NCIS, Prison Break, and Being Human. 87 stories with 169,449 words. I'll have a quick look through them and see if there's anything worth reposting, but I doubt it. 14 years olds aren't usually very good, ya know? Though I do look at Reviews: 220 and think yikes, I did not have social anxiety when I was that age did I?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

down here they call us animals has 32, but the rest of them are single digits because SGU is such a small fandom.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always, love talking to people about my fics and it's not going to encourage people to keep commenting if they get no response from the author. Sometimes it takes a while because my spoons can get funky.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

so i bite my tongue and hope for blood, where Telford gets sexually assaulted by a drugged Rush, then goes on a killing rampage with none of the recovery (if there even is any beyond pretending it never happened) shown and nothing is really resolved.

there was a devil in my soul i think we activated, set during 2x07 The Greater Good, extends the scene aboard the derelict spaceship between Young and Rush. Young has a ton of trauma about Carmen, David, Riley, and P2S-569, and ends the fic in a pretty suicidal place.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This was a bit tougher to answer as I usually have some angst hanging around, but i'm a stolen car in a parking garage, where at the end Rush and Telford are bantering back and forth, sharing-time is happening, and they also have their first kiss in this fic, after having been fucking for a while.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nah, it's much better than it was back in the day. At least in the fandoms I frequent.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Oh, do I! 😄 Every gay kind that takes my fancy, from vanilla to super kinky. There are of course a few kinks I avoid reading/writing about as I'm sure everyone does, but if anyone has a specific kink they'd like to see me write hit me up and we'll talk!

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I'm afraid not. I'm just not that into them. 🤷‍♂️ (The fact that if I filter out crossovers on the SGU AO3 page I lose ~400 fics is a crime!)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Back in the day me and a friend wrote many hundreds of thousands of words RPing the 10th Doctor and the Master. RPing isn't allowed on ffnet so I received a warning and they deleted the fic. Thankfully I still have every single one of those fics due to being anal about backing stuff up on memory sticks, so if you'd like them @chosennightmares let me know. ❤️️

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Telford/Rush, if I have to pick just one, though I could chuck Young in there and go through every combination possible and still be very happy.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Nothing currently posted as due to having a lot of unfinished fics on ffnet I'm adverse to posting things without at least having an ending in mind. But there's an SGU fic titled Your Own Worst Enemy which was started in August last year and delves into rape recovery for Rush, Young, Telford, and Destiny herself. I need to be in the right headspace to write it and despite having 8 chapters of it completed I don't know how it's going to end up.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Developing different versions of Rush, Young, and Telford and have all of them still be in character despite being so different.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Getting the end of the fic written, knowing how to sign things off. The promised SGA fic sat 95% completed for fucking ages where all I could do whenever I scrolled to it was stare.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Knowing the state Google Translate is in, I probably wouldn't risk it, no. It does annoy me when I'm reading and I'm told to scroll to the author's notes at the bottom of the fic to see what's been said and then having to scroll all the way back up, potentially losing my place. Much prefer people using the HTML hover text option.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who. My mum was involved in putting together Who Cons when I was a kid, so I grew up watching the classic series.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

a memory, a distant echo I really enjoyed writing it, fleshing out David's character, and really digging into his psyche. It's a tough read, but I'm very proud of how it turned out.

tagging @thestorieswesay @no-more-pawn @chosennightmares @galadhir @sga-owns-my-soul

#tag game #about me #writeblr #mine #judgeverse #long post

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butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway · 2 years

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I don't know if I have ADHD or autism. I kind of feel like I do cause man does a lot of stuff going on with my friend who has them resonate with me (part of why I wish she'd take me up on my offer for a free room at my place, just want to mitigate some of the struggles I've had for someone I like and relate to if I can)

Anyway... RSD really does feel like it fits a lot. Like it just kills me when I feel like I've made someone mad or annoyed someone... said the wrong thing... you know

Obviously I try not to let it show, cause it goes back to how if you break down into a mess every time someone brings something to you, it makes it hard for people to talk to you about anything, but it still hurts

And like... I try with my friend not to do stuff that would set off her RSD cause she 100% has it, like I just try to pick my words carefully no in a walking on eggshells kind of way, but like running it by myself and see how I'd take it. Actually just kind of do this for everyone when I can

Just kind of sucks cause... you know... she doesn't really return that for me... I don't know, she's a good friend but... I don't know

Wish I could read minds, not even to spy on people, but just cause no one ever communicates what they want even if I ask directly. Wish I could read minds just so I could take their needs into my plans instead of me just slowly working my way along but having 100 different next steps in the back of my head I could use if someone just asks for them to become the priority

Everything I do is for me. I get the house for me, I clean the house for me, everything I did benefits me and I made sure of that to avoid breeding resentment... but like I started with the room I think my friend would like, I got the checking set up on my account, I'm finally in a situation where things are kind of smooth

My friend goes from saying she's gonna have to buy a ticket and come up here to get away from her family to never hearing about it again... it's probably cause change is very overwhelming so the fact it was really on the table made her hesitate to do anything but... if she'd just talk to me I could work on doing things to accommodate and mitigate stuff that's bothering her

But like... you see how if I do have RSD, how like just getting hit with a brick wall by everyone at everyturn just has it kind of always running where it's just like "What did I do wrong? Why won't you tell me how to fix this? I just want some company, was I only better compared to a very sick and hard to deal with dog slowly dying, but not better than emotionally abusive parents?"

If I were more out of touch with reality I'd say "clearly the government is trying to isolate me to make me go crazy", but like... nah... these things just happen... sometimes by chance and personality you just wind up isolated

Eh... really didn't want to send another message today. Guess this is just like one of those "write a letter you won't send" exercises, but then I drop it in someone's anon

Glad it sounded like you had a pretty good day, hope the walk was a good time

...I'm just tired and wish I'd learn to keep my mouth shut

RSD is brutal, and it's really frustrating how easily it could be set off.

Back before either of us had the language for it, wifey and I used to struggle with our coping mechanisms set off each other's RSD to the point that we were both actively alienating each other so badly our marriage was unraveling. It hasn't been easy learning how to create compatibility where distress had made a home, and it certainly involved setting off each others RSD a lot more in our attempts to talk through it.

Recently, we had a couple of small spats where one or the other of us was having a bad day and acted hurtfully. The other snapped back or resorted to coping strategies that we both know aren't on the table if our marriage is to remain happy. And instead of spiraling deeper into hell from there, we sat together, in pain and hurting, and tried to hear each other rather than the RSD-filtered interpretations of what each was saying. It was hard. We cried a lot. But at the end, we had learned something new about what we each needed.

It was interesting to see how much our experience of RSD and conflict has changed with each other based on a decade of painful work. It was nice to feel closer at the end of tension rather than to feel the distance grow.

Wifey has started getting assessed for autism and I have started getting assessed for ADHD (ironic in that wifey has been throughly diagnosed ADHD and I thoroughly assessed as autistic, though final diagnosis is still pending the savings to pay for that stage of assessment). I think having language to express yourself and others who understand your mind matters a lot. Without it the world can feel very cold and alone.

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igarbagecannoteven · 3 years

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#welp #as of today my ficspo playlist has 100 songs on it #so basically i could write for the rest of my life and never get to all of them asdfghfkld #nah i know for a fact there are some that i won't ever write anything for #altho there are some missing on it #like the other half of doom days #anyways this has been an update on megs' insanity tune in next time for her to still not have finished any projects #rip #the trash talks

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sailxrmxrs · 3 years

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can someone tell me why the most cursed and yet blessed headcanons and aus come from the discord at 2am. anyway divorce lawyer au has been dwelling in my head rent free. then divorce lawyer xyx and wedding planner mc was born. s/o nei for planting the seed that sparked this. i hope i did your vision justice 🙏 lowkey going through it as i write but hopefully it's half decent lmao enjoy

"So tell me, what do you do for a living?" Xyx asked, taking a sip of the deep red wine in his glass. A nice merlot as per the recommendation of the waiter. Xyx wasn't typically a wine guy, usually opting for a nice whiskey. But in a place as fancy as this, it only felt appropriate to really get into the atmosphere of it all. Besides, how could he complain when he was sitting across the table from such beautiful company? He hadn't been ecstatic about the idea when a coworker suggested setting him up with a friend of theirs but ultimately what was there to lose? He typically didn't date around a lot what with how busy his job was. There was also the additional factor that Xyx was a divorce lawyer. Day in, day out he had to deal with all kinds of relationship issues. From minor separation cases to far more serious ordeals. Xyx's own relationship history combined with the tumultuous nature of his job left him somewhat jaded about dating and romantic relationships. Sure, the idea of it sounded nice, but the reality was oftentimes not quite so sweet.

"Oh, I'm actually a wedding planner! After I graduated I felt kind of burned out with my studies so decided to look for something entirely different. I took an events management class during my undergrad and enjoyed it, so I thought why not figure out how to do that. And now, a few years later, I get to plan people's weddings for a living! How about you? What pays your bills?"

Xyx chuckled in amusement. Oh what a pair they made. "I'm a divorce lawyer. The one who deals with the aftermath of your former clients' bad choices."

There was a beat of stunned silence before Xyx's date burst into laughter. "Are you serious? Have we been transported into some romance novel?"

"Nah, this is too perfect to be written. What with my divorces and your weddings I think we're doomed to fail right from the start, doll." Xyx watched as his date raised a single brow, smirking as they took a sip from their own wine glass.

"We'll just have to wait and see about that then, won't we?"

Oh, yes. Xyx was going to have some fun with this one.

Weeks came and went, the pair still meeting for dates out and nights in. It wasn't anything official, just some casual fun between two work obsessed adults. Despite their star crossed occupations, it became apparent just how natural everything felt so soon. Xyx showing up slightly early to pick up his date to see them not fully ready yet. He happily strolls in and sits on their bed, watching as they frantically run about the apartment trying to find that one pair of shoes that goes ever so nicely with their outfit. He smiles to himself, leaning back on his hands. It feels awfully domestic, like a boyfriend waiting for his partner. Maybe that's what this is. Maybe he does feel something more than just a physical attraction to them. Maybe hearing the way they rant about a difficult client, or listen to him talk about a particularly stressful day was nice. Maybe being the divorce lawyer jaded about love wasn't the kind of man he wanted to be anymore.

A month later and Xyx knows for a fact that he's in love. There's no other word to describe it. His heart pounds and his hands clam up every time he thinks about telling them. It's not that he doesn't want them to know, but rather the last person he told he loved broke his heart and shattered so much of who he was. What if he went through all that again? What if they saw him pouring out his heart and soul and just threw it back in his face? He'd seen couple after couple arguing and fighting over so much in his line of work. Heard so many horror stories and nightmarish accounts of families torn apart at the seams, couples who had once been so sickeningly in love they declared it for the world to see in the gold bands on their fingers. He didn't know if he could face all that again.

But now, he had them. He had their warm smile, their gentle eyes, their soft touch. Those fears would dwindle as soon as he felt a hand cautiously touching his thigh, pulling him out of those spiralling thoughts.

"Hey, talk to me. What's troubling you?"

Xyx stumbled on his words. He sighed, his own hand coming down to hold theirs. "Don't worry about me, doll. Just thinking about things."

"Well I do worry about you. More than you probably realise." They reached their other hand to gently play with the strands of hair at Xyx's temple, admiring the man sat beside them.

"You do?"

"Of course I do. I love you, silly."

Xyx's eyes widened, his entire body going rigid.

"Shit, was that-? No, ignore me. Forget I said anything." Before they could continue to try and stutter out some kind of excuse or change the topic, Xyx leaned in and kissed them. It wasn't anything like their past kisses. This was something far more intimate. It was ever so soft, and ever so quick, but there was some deep rooted emotion dwelling in it that Xyx could only hope they felt it too. His lips left theirs, his face remaining so close they could probably count each individual freckle adorning his skin.

"Now why would I want to forget something like that, doll?"

They stuttered, entirely lost for words. Something about their close proximity, his deep voice, and that godforsaken nickname struck a chord that ignited the flames of a beautiful symphony. Before they could give an answer, or at least attempt to, Xyx's mouth was on theirs again. This time urgent, more desperate, as though Xyx wanted to mould the shape of his lips onto theirs, branding his touch on them for eternity. Their fingers tangled in his hair as his curled around their waist, holding their body close to his.

Breathless and dazed, Xyx pulled back. "In case it wasn't obvious, I love you too."

Months pass and that heavenly sweet honeymoon phase had long passed, and the pair settled into something comfortable. Healthy. They had just moved in together, deciding their hectic schedules had kept them apart long enough. Luckily they each earned a sizable enough wage to afford the double office space in their new apartment. One was decorated with an array of wedding photos from past clients, vases filled with flowers of all colours adorning the desk and shelves. It was light and bright and radiated the hopeful romance that weddings promised. Entirely fitting and aligned with the optimism of a wedding planner. Xyx's, on the other hand, was darker. Instead of pine bookshelves and brightly coloured decorations, his office consisted of a darker oak. Shelves of case files and information lined the walls, stacks of loose sheets were dotted haphazardly about the place. It reflected the harsh realities his job made him come face-to-face with on a regular basis. But, where he might have let that weight him down before, now it didn't quite do that. Sure, marriage might be a step too far out of his comfort zone—at least at this point in his life. He didn't feel quite so pessimistic about love, especially now that he'd fallen so deeply in it. But the thought of having a wedding, going on a honeymoon, being a married man... What if it all just came crashing down? How could he ever pick himself back up again after that? He'd seen far too much mess and chaos and destruction to think that something like that could work for him. At least, right now, anyway.

Sighing as he removed his glasses, Xyx rubbed at the corners of his eyes, feeling the dull ache of having worn the glasses for so long. It had been an exhausting day. Earlier on, he'd been out for a meeting with a particularly difficult client before returning home to finish his work. He couldn't stand to be in the company's stuffy offices any longer after being shouted at by, frankly, one of the worst humans he'd ever interacted with. All he wanted now was to collapse on the sofa with his favourite person lounging in his arms, venting about their days before ordering food and letting the rest of the day wash past them. Standing from the desk, Xyx wondered to himself, Was this really his life now? Just a year ago he'd been so close to writing off relationships entirely. Yet here he was, disgustingly in love with another.

"Hey, I just got done with some paperwork, you want to order some Chinese food? Oh, is everything good? You look a little tired." They stopped short in the doorway, phone in hand as they looked at Xyx, concern and slight worry marring their face.

"Ah, nothing, love. Just work being work."

"That same client from last week?"

"Yeah, it seems she's taken it upon herself to get on every last nerve in my body. I trust your day was better?"

"Much. More couples with stars in their eyes and no end to the money they'll spend on their perfect day."

"Can't we trade jobs for a day? Let me have the happy ones in their wedding bliss while you deal with the angry ones determined to shout about the most ridiculous things?" Xyx strode over to them, his hands sliding around their waist as he pressed a kiss to their forehead. "Just a thought, you know."

"Hm," they pondered. "No. Anyway, being a wedding planner isn't all sunshine and rainbows. You've not dealt with the helicopter parents or obstinate brides, grooms, and other weddinggoers of the world dead set on making my life as difficult as they can."

Another kiss pressed to their forehead. "I can handle it. Plus I'd love to see you go up against some of my clients. You look cute when you get mad."

"I hate you."

"I love you too, doll."

#blooming panic #blooming panic xyx #blooming panic fanfic #blooming panic xyx fanfic #blooming panic x reader #blooming panic xyx x reader #this au is one of many from the server that has sustained me #anna writes

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sea-salted-wolverine · 2 years

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@slightlyunderokayartist i made another post so I didn't hijack the other one. Because I basically paraphrased an entire novel.

I am going to make you appreciate Pride and Prejudice. It may at some point involve a PowerPoint full of comic sans and memes but I'm on my phone right now, so bear with me. Don't worry, I will remain nice about it.

The thing about Austen, is that she was one of the earliest means based feminists. (Yes, shes writing about landed gentry, but this is 180fuck and feminism is baby steps) Basically the thrust of alot of her work is that violence against women isn't always physical or even particularly violent. A lot of her contemporaries had stories about kidnapping and coercion and perfect pure heroines. In contrast Austen writes a character who is kinda a bitch and the primary antagonist is the fact that her life is entirely beholden to the decisions of the men around her.

So the book opens and you have lizzy. A bitch(affectionate). Shes got four sisters, no brothers and parents wealthy enough to own a country estate but not a London town house. So they're well-off but not fancy.

Lizzy is the second daughter and her dads favorite, because she's clever and cynical like he is. Her older sister is beautiful and sweet and shy and if Austen were anyone else she would be the main character. But Austen said 'nah, I wanna write about the messy one'. There are also 3 younger sisters who are various mixtures of spoiled bratty immature wild child girls.

If you can't tell, Mom and Dad have not been doing a ton of parenting. Specifically Dad, has not bothered to hire a tutor or send them to school so none of them has any marketable skills beyond being a socialite. And they're not even particularly good at it. Dad is less than motivated to take them anywhere they make connections and the entire family is pretty yikes as a result of his decisions. People see Jane (older sister) and go 'oh shes pretty and pleasant and her sister (lizzy) is fun to chat with, but yikes'

The issue is, there's no dowery for any of these girls. A dowery, if you don't already know is money set aside for a woman's married life that transfers to control of her husband when she leaves her family or if she doesn't marry, goes in a trust so she'll be supported when she doesn't have family to take her in. Its basically an insurance policy so she won't starve to death on the street because women can't legally own anything. Also it's a lot of money, that then goes to the new husband, so it makes woman in question more desirable. These girls don't have that, because dad never got around to it. Other issue, when dad dies all his stuff, including the house, goes to some cousin because women can't hold property. Cousin has never met this family and could decide to kick them all out when he owns the house.

Mom, looks at her daughters and goes, 'holy tits, you have got to get married. Preferably to someone rich enough to take care of his in-laws, but married, now.' So she's trying to marry her daughters off for money and different adaptions handle this differently but the original work is pretty forgiving because the other option is pretty grim.

In comes Mr Darcy and his buddy Mr Bingley. Bingley is very wealthy and has the personality of a golden retriever. Darcy is extremely wealthy and doesn't want to be there but his extrovert bestie is dragging him to parties because its good for him.

Mom goes 🤑🤑🤑 and shoves her daughters over there. Bingley and Jane are getting along immediately and Darcy is looking at Mom and going "uh dude..."

There is an overheard conversation that consists mostly of "eh, Jane seems nice but uh everything else? Yikes.😬 " to which Lizzy has the opinion of "what a dick, whatever, not like i ever have to see him again"

Except Mom sees JanexBingley happening and she's gotta lock that shit down. So she insists jane ride on over to his place for a visit tomorrow. In the rain.

"But momma we are fragile English gentry we can't get rained on, I will surely fall ill and die" says jane.

"Yeah, no shit, that's the point. Now go live your favorite hurt/comfort sick!fic and snag a husband"

Jane gets rained on, Jane gets sick. Lizzy says absolutely not and walks over to Bingley's house in the mud and busts down the door to get to Jane. (Lizzy has Plot Armour and/or a functional circulatory system)

Darcy, who's chilling at his bros house, looks at Lizzy and goes "oh, wow" Lizzy goes "you're a dick i don't care about your opinions"

Inside of Darcy head: ooooooh😳😳😳 pretty lady being mean to me? Flirting? 💘Maybe?🥰 oh no shes meeting all my standards

What actually comes out of his mouth: I'm not impressed

Lizzy: I don't feel bad about hating you, because as usual, I'm right

Then Mom shows up, because it can always be worse. Jane is in fact living and enjoying her hurt/comfort sick!fic and Lizzy is about to invent noise canceling headphones a couple centuries early so she doesn't have to make any more small talk. Mom wants to make sure that Jane is being slutty enough. The bratty little sisters are there. Bingley is shopping for rings. Darcy the hypocrite thinks maybe he should chill a little because the prospective inlaws are yikes.

A note: having unhinged in-laws was a big no-no that reflected badly on you as a person, un like today when its just assumed that everyone has a nightmare somewhere on the other side of the family. Like the toilet shotgun. We don't talk about the toilet shotgun.

Carrying on

We meet a dude. His name is Wickham. Hes a bad dude but we don't know that yet. He is of the opinion that Darcy is a huge cunt and Lizzy decides this man has good opinions. There's drama, Darcy screwed me over, blah blah, he sucks and I'm broke but handsome and charming.

We also meet the cousin. Imagine the most obnoxious person you know with a connection to some random famous wealthy person and make sure they bring it up every chance they get. He's also aware he inherits the house.

Marrying your cousin was a thing back then, so he looks at the available choices and picks the pretty one. Jane is spoken for, says Mom but Lizzy is very lovely, I'm sure she would love to be not homeless. Cousin goes yea sure, acceptable. Hey Liza, sorry, Lizzy, I love you v. much, plz marry.

Lizzy, understandably, does not want. Says no. Will not marry into a miserable loveless marriage for comfort. Dad gets the final say, says yeah thats reasonable, favorite daughter gets what she wants. Mom goes "hey your options are miserable and married or miserable and homeless. And your entire family comes with you on the second one. Are you sure thats your final answer?"

Theres some plot, there's a party. Bingley cuts it off with Jane and she sad. Lizzy is pretty sure it's Darcy's fault.

The man himself shows up and asks her to marry him. It goes... poorly.

There is an adaption where she starts swinging a fire poker at him while spouting lines of dialog lifted straight from the book and its not out of place. She reads this man for filth, bringing up Wickham and how he's responsible for breaking her sisters heart and also in general a huge dick that she would not marry if he was the last man on earth. It does not help that he's not only admitting to the things she's accusing him of but defending it with stuff like "i didnt want my buddy marrying into your nightmare family" and "Wickham is an asshole who deserved it"

She knows shes fucked if she doesn't mary rich but she bitches this man out so hard he leaves town and goes back home to learn to be nicer.

A bit later she gets a long ass letter explaining how Darcy thought that Jane was getting shoved into marriage by their mother and didn't want her and Bingley to end up unhappy. And also how Wickham got a fuckload of money from Darcy's dead father and squandered it all because he's an asshole. The asshole also tried to marry his baby sister to weasel into the family fortune so they're not talking and there's the 1800s version of a restraining order out there. Ends with something like "I respect you and am a little scared of you which is why I wanted to marry you and if you never want to speak to me again thats fine"

Lizzy should really be allowed to say fuck here but she doesn't. She decides to get out of town herself and goes to chill with her aunt and uncle. They're touring the countryside and Darcy has a house big enough for tours so they end up touring the house. (Ugh, rich people)

The household staff who work for this guy are all of high opinions. The cleaning lady knows your shit. She knows. And they all like the guy.

Lizzy does not say fuck.

Darcy is not supposed to be there in his own house but he shows up in his own house and sees the love of his life with whom he monumentally blew it. In his own house.

Darcy doesn't get to say fuck either.

Lizzy gets a letter and she really really should be allowed to say fuck because Wickham has run off with her baby sister.

Not married. Run off. Sister has had no supervision or parenting and just knows she needs to get a man so she did. Kinda. And tanked her whole family's reputation in doing so. No no one will marry any of the sisters and they're all fucked.

Darcy realizes this is partly his fault and hes also the only one who can really fix it. So he, without telling anyone, runs down Wickham and threatens/blackmails/bribes him into marrying baby sister and saving everyone's reputation. He makes sure little sister and Wickham have enough money to live comfortably regardless of how shit that relationship turns out to be.

Then he goes over to his sad golden retriever friend who has been moping about the pretty lady who didn't love him and point out that now he has spent all that money and effort rehabilitating the Bennet reputation Bingley might as well marry Jane. So Bingley prances off to go propose to Jane and Mom realizes her family is secure and quits double fisting ye old anxiety meds.

He doesn't tell anyone this. Lizzys family still thinks she hates him. He shows up and goes "hey hope you're happy and okay with this, my feelings haven't changed since last time I asked, I'm hoping yours have."

Lizzy would love to marry this guy because he was never really an asshole from the start and her family is indeed kinda a mess.

Her dad reassures her she doesn't have to marry the rich dude she hates for his money, Jane already did that. Lizzy explains that no actually she loves him and also he saved their ass with respect to the Wickham debacle. Dad decides that Darcy must be a good dude if thats the case and says yep go get married.

Blah blah blah happily ever after.

Lizzy overcomes her prejudices against Darcy and unbends her pride enough to admit she was wrong.

#pride and prejudice #i did not intend to summarize the whole thing im sorry #its good #Elizabeth Bennet is a bitch (affectionate)#sitting over here with my dunce cap that barely fits over my enormous brain

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mxtcha-tea · 4 years

Text

domestic shiratorizawa

⊹summary; the life inside the dorms of shiratorizawa

⊹pilots; gn![y/n], ushijima, tendou, semi, yamagata, reon, kawanishi, shirabu, goshiki (pairings showed; yamagata x reader, goshiki x reader)

⊹genre; fluff, crack and some cursings (no proofread)

⊹flight details; i've once made a domestic imagines in my old blog so imma make a small reboot of it <3

random shopping

normal day, normal life. you could've seen yourself laying or even napping in your room while a compilation of minecraft songs plays in the background. but no. instead, you're inside an antique shop with Yamagata, Ushijima and Tendou.

you have no idea when, or how did the process happened but you surely is done with getting dragged inside the shop by Tendou and Yamagata.

while Ushijima's stuck on a section, you don't know where, but he's definitely stuck there, "[y/n]! look at what i found,"

Yamagata called you as you turned around to see him holding up a pretty heavy doll. you raise your brow, "what the hell is that?" walking towards him and taking a closer look at the object in hand,

"i think it's a, um, i think a matryoska doll? matroyska? is that how you say it?" "why're you asking me, i don't know jack shit about russian stuff,"

"ah you mean, matryoshka doll?" Tendou butted in, startling you two, "it's also called a 'nesting doll' and did you actually know that it was actually originated from china?"

Yamagata's eyes practically sparkled at that with a surprised look, "from china? really?"

you can only roll your eyes, "and how can you even know all that?" Tendou snickered and put on a smug face, "i'm actually very smart, y'know. ya'll just don't know about it," "says the person in class 2,"

"i blame the mathematic old hags for adding letters in math, and the apple that fucking hit my man Isaac," you tsk'ed and walk towards the next section. Yamagata passive aggressively put the matryoshka doll down and follow after you along with Tendou,

"also, we need to find ushijima, i think he's stuck in some section between here...ah there," you stopped walking and turn to your right where you find Ushijima reading a book.

Tendou skipped towards him and smack his shoulder, "you okay, wakatoshi-kun? you sure did took longer to look at the stuff here," while Tendou chats with Ushijima, Yamagata look up at the shelves as something caught his eyes.

he tried to reach it while tip toing but due to his height, he can't reach it. then, he jumped from his spot to grab the object but end up hitting his head onto the board, "AGH, FUCK!" which causes you all to look at him, watching him hold his head while shivering from the pain,

"are you okay, yamagata?" ushijima ask, putting back the book on the shelves, "yeah, yeah, i'm just tryna get that," he shakes his head before pointing up.

you followed his finger and caught a glimpse of an old polaroid. it's a little bit dusty but other than that, it looks new. Ushijima reached it from his spot and managed to grab it, "here,"

he hands it to Yamagata as he instantly recovered from his recent pain and snatch it from Ushijima's hand, subtly thanking him with a grin, "why do you even need a polaroid?" Tendou asked, leaning his arm over Ushijima's shoulder with one brow up,

"pfft, for journaling of course,"

a gust of wind went through you while staring at him with a poker face, the same with Tendou with a small cat like smile. Ushijima just looked the same,

"okay," "WHAT'S WITH THE TONE??" you blinked and just knit your eyebrows, "i mean, since when you started journaling? you're not even the type of person to do something aesthetic,"

he pouted and just crosses his arms, "so what? that doesn't mean i can't do it, right? have faith in me god darn it. and honestly, my journal looks good so far," "well, fine,"

you waved your hand at him and continue going through the other section. and just like that, "hey wait!" Yamagata tailed after you.

Tendou snickered at the two and focus back on Ushijima, who's still watching the display yet again, "have you thought of what to buy wakatoshi-kun?" "i'm not sure, there's a lot of interesting stuff here," "well, you've only been in this section but okay~"

studying

"agh, why did those idiots really have to call me at this time...?"

you groaned, slowly walking through the halls with a slouched figure. tracing your fingers along the wall with a dejected look. you're suppose to sleep today.

an hour or two long sleep. it's finally the weekend which means the time for you to sleep all of your problems away. drifting into slumber with fluffy pillows and warm blankets, enjoying your dream as long as you can.

until your ringtone annoyingly rings next to your ear. you answer the call, and again greeted by the most annoying human in the planet,

"[y/n], we need you at the gym right now!"

"huh? oh fuck off Tendou, i need to sleep right now,"

"nuh uh, you can sleep later after you go to the gym,"

"why? are you, i don't know, practicing or something?"

"you have to find out. if you don't move your ass from that bed, we'll send Hayato to wake you up~"

". . ."

and now, you find yourself standing in front of the door of shiratorizawa's volleyball gym. not only that Tendou wakes you up from your sleep, you also had to WALK all the way from your dorm to the gym,

"i'm gonna add more time to their practices after this..."

sliding the door open, you expect them to be doing serves or maybe spikes.

but instead, you're seeing them—as in the 3rd years—all sitting down at the middle of the court, with books around them.

and what's even more confusing is that they somehow managed to bring a table inside. no, not the flip-able table.

literally a whole ass table.

Reon looks up from his book and notices your figure standing on the door way. he waves his hand at you, you did the same but still with a confused look.

Yamagata was next to see you as he abruptly stand up from his spot, shaking the table in the process,

"Hayato! stop shaking the table," "oops, sorry. ah, wait, [y/n]!"

that caught all of the boys attention as they look at you, "what taking you so long to arrive?" Tendou asked, a pen rested in between his upper lip and nose.

Semi smacked him in the face—earning an 'ow'—before shaking his head,

"their dorm is literally far from the gym, and why do you even proposed your idea of studying at the gym anyway?"

you make your way towards them, Reon patting the empty spot next to him. you sat down on your spot as Yamagata did the same. seemed like he was waiting for you.

Tendou rubbed his nose and pouted at Semi, "this was the best place to study anyway! it have much more room,"

"we should've gone to the cafeteria OR the LIBRARY," Semi groaned, looking back at his book before writing on it,

"pfft, the cafeteria's no fun. and i got banned from the library," Reon looks at Tendou with confusion, "well, it's not surprising,"

Tendou shrugged, "i was also banned from the library," Ushijima said, not looking up from his notes as you knit your eyebrows at that,

"you're also banned from the library? Satori, what did you and Ushijima did—" "anyways, um,"

he cut you off, fidgeting with his pen before pointing it at you, "right, you need to tutor us on this subject~!"

you blinked, looking down at the book they're studying about, "haven't the teacher covered this already?"

"well, i'm sorry, class 6. but we have no idea how this thing works. maybe only Reon, but look at Semi,"

Tendou wrapped his arm around Semi's neck, practically head locking him, "he's from class 1 and i think you should teach him about this the most," "I'll rip your fucking head off, Tendou!"

while both of them tried to strangle each other, Yamagata caught your attention next,

"and also, it won't be fun without you, y'know," Reon nodded, "and don't forget that you can't leave me alone in this,"

"oh right," "hm? what was that?" Yamagata asked. you just shake your head with a defeated smile, "nothing..."

after clearing your throat, you snatched Semi's book away before flipping through the pages,

"okay you scumbags, it's time to learn,"

oblivious enough

the birds chirped from the tree, the hallway's as loud as ever. Semi and Tendou's leaning against the window, each of them drinking apple juice and eating yakisoba bread.

it was silence between them before Semi spoke, "hey, Tendou," "yes Semi-Semi?" "y'know,"

Semi turned his head to look at Tendou as the redhead did the same, "have you, noticed the relationship between [y/n] and Yamagata lately?"

the latter made a thinking face, before nodding, "hm, seems so,"

"do you think, either one of them ever noticed about it?" Tendou shakes his head at the question, "nope, i don't think they do. in fact, they might be completely oblivious to it,"

Semi snickered, "right, like that one time..."

"[y/n], do you think my lips are dry right now?"

you look up from your clipboard, seeing Yamagata pointing his lips, "hm, nah. they're fine, but if you want, i can but on some lip balm,"

his eyes sparkled at that as he nodded his head with excitement, "sure!" you walk towards your bag with Yamagata following you. opening the zipper and search inside it, you pull out your lip balm,

"here, hold still," you put a hand on his cheek while the other applies lip balm onto his lips. it was a slow process but he managed to not move at all while making eye contact with you.

once you finished applying, he pop his lips before humming, "mn, cherry," "let me know if you need anything else,"

he nodded with now flushed cheeks as he smile at you. you did the same, gently patting his arm.

from a distance, Shirabu looks at them with a disgusted look, "ugh, can't they be more subtle about it,"

Kawanishi shrugged, "just let them be,"

"how can i redo my memory? i don't need to see that this early," "well, what if it was us?" "i would be twice as grossed, i can put my own lip balm," "hm yeah, you're right, i honestly would be like that too," "good,"

"haha yeah, now that i think about it, they do it all the time right?" Tendou nodded at Semi's statement before hearing the all too familiar voice just a few meters away from them,

"[y/n]!"

you turned your head around while still sipping your drink. Yamagata stood in front of you, holding out his visibly crumpled necktie with a small smile,

"my necktie!" "ah again? whatever," you give your drink to him as he hold it for you.

grabbing the necktie from his hand, looping it around his collar shirt and started tying it with a concentrated look,

"i can't say that it'll be clean when i finished tying it," "it's okay! that's why i'm asking you to do it, messy or not, at least i have it on," "hm, yeah,"

after you finished tying it and patting it a little, Yamagata hugged you, "thank you!" "yeah, you're welcome,"

the aura literally radiates on the slightly crowded hallway as some of the students who passed you talked among themselves.

Semi and Tendou stared at you two, expressionless eyes but with a small smile,

'ah, right,'

Tendou sighed, intertwining his fingers together and lifting it up to his cheeks, "ah, young love~"

"we're all the same age,"

"young love~"

bonus; reliable kouhai

lifeless.

is what goshiki would say when he took a few glances at you from his book. you promised to tutor him about this subject he's struggling on. but didn't really expect to see your slouched form walking inside the library.

he's not even sure if you even hear anything you're saying right now, "get a shovel and two-" your head hit the table, creating a loud sound and catching the attention of almost everyone inside the library,

"[y/n]-senpai, um, are you okay??" you groaned and rapidly blink your eyes, covering your forehead, "yeah, 'm just..."

a yawn escaped from your mouth before you can even finish your sentence, "...tired. those stupid senpais of yours need help tutoring too even tho being grown ass men,"

goshiki closes his book and creating a small 'thump', snapping you out from your mind,

"well, if that so then you didn't have to come, you could've just tell me and i would be fine with it!" your hoarse laugh caught him off guard as a shade of red ran across his cheeks, "i can't break a promise, tsutomu. why do you even think i agree on tutoring you?"

"uh, cause you want to help me with my studies?" "one of it, and cause i enjoy tutoring you," he can feel his cheeks heating up more when you made eye contact with him, a small smile laced upon your face,

"and honestly, you're smarter than i thought. class 4 right? that's cool," he looked away, trying to calm his nerves down, "t-thanks! a lot of people thought i was in a lower class, so i, i appreciate it,"

goshiki took a peek at you, now burying your face onto your face, "also, senpai," "hm?"

"you should take a nap for now, i think i can start understanding this formula," you slightly look up at him, "you sure? i was prolly talking craps just now," "yeah! your health is more important anyway,"

you hum, offering him a warm smile, "thanks, i know i can count on you," you rested onto your side and close your eyes. lips slightly parted and just like that, you're deep in your dreams.

he pursed his lips, slowly leaning against the table to look at your face. it's calm, peaceful and beautiful, kissable lips. he wonder if he could lean in a little closer until you two-

goshiki instantly jolted up and hit himself on the head, face's covered in the color red, 'no! don't think about that, curse you Tendou-San for introducing me to those mangas...'

Tendou's faces ran across his mind as he grunted,

'why're they so pretty??'

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mysimpleme14 · 4 years

Text

Sasusaku: Selfish

Note: I have a soft spot for Sasusaku blank period, and last night my brain decided to award me with an angsty Sasusaku dream at 4pm. I ain't good at writing but I just can't let that dream go, it was beautiful 😭 hope you will enjoy, excuse my grammar please don't sue

Sasuke stands still, eyes staring at the pink-haired girl, lying weak on the bed. Her face is filled with bruises and bandages wrapped around her arms. His loose hands becomes a tight grip as he recall yesterday's incident. Seeing Sakura unconcious, in her most awful state on the ground destroyed him. It was because of him, and he was too late to save her.

"I'm sorry, Sakura" his words come out as a soft whisper, even he could hardly hear them. Sasuke turns around after hearing a click at the door.

"You're leaving already?" Naruto lifts his eyebrows, scaning his bestfriend from head to toe. He's wearing his usual black cloak, ninja equipments are safe inside the small bag tied around his thigh and a black bag he carries behind him. Seeing Sasuke turns around to look at Sakura one last time before walking towards the ward room door, Naruto knows he doesn't need an answer.

"Hey, look. Sakura-chan isn't awake yet. Maybe you should wait until-"

"I have to go, Naruto" he says before feeling a hand on his shoulder stopping him from behind.

"Sasuke, its not your fault."

Silence.

Naruto doesn't need to hear anything from Sasuke, he knows him well enough, a guy who talks as less as he can, hiding all of his pain alone behind those lonely eyes.

"Naruto" Sasuke says while turning his head to look at his childhood rival.

"Convince her to accept the proposal. Tell her to stop waiting for me. I don't know when I'll be back"

"Wha- the hell, Sasuke? You know she loves you too much she would wait forever for you!"

"She can't possibly wait forever, can she?" He says with a smirk before feeling a dull pain on his left cheek. Eyes wide, Sasuke stares at the guy infront of him.

"Snap out of it, will ya?! No one loves you more than her and you know that. You just don't want to admit it. You think I didn't notice how you look at her everytime we hang out when you get back?" Sasuke just replied with a short "Tch"

"Now I dare you stare at me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel the same way. I dare you watch her accept that proposal and marry another guy. I dare you, Sasuke!" Naruto's eyes reflect his feelings perfectly, anger. Sasuke sighs, trying to get all of his strength to stand back up and replies very calmly.

"Enough is enough, Naruto. Don't you think Sakura already suffered too much?"

"She won't be happy with me. She deserves someone so much better than me. Someone who will love her" he pauses

"More than I ever will" its a soft mumble but Naruto can still hear every word.

"She was kidnapped because of me, Naruto. Tortured because of me. This isn't even the first time. People put her through these because of me. Now don't tell me she hadn't had enough"

This time it is Naruto who keeps his mouth shut.

"I have many enemies. I just- don't want her to suffer because my past"

-----

Sakura is panting. She can hardly feel her legs. But there is something more important to settle right here, right now. And there he is, the love of her life standing still infront of her. She sees his eyes widened, and stays like that for a brief second, before turning into his usual cold eyes, staring at her.

"Sasuke-kun.." she walks slowly towards him. Her injury from the incident two days ago doesn't make it any better, but she doesn't care. All she wants to do right now is to hold the man she loves most, and settle this once and for all.

She knows what she had was mutual, she can feel the bond between Sasuke and her closer than ever now. The way he talks changes after his journey of redemption. The soft touch on her forehead he gives everytime before starting his trip. His small gestures of walking her home everytime the team hangs out, the subtle moments of him trying to brush away her patients when they started asking her personal questions. Sasuke was never the type to convey his feelings through words, she knows this much by now.

"I love you" she whispers briefly, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. She stays for a while and continues.

"No matter how long it takes.. I will wait for you" Sasuke is still in shock, the familiar smell Sakura had since they were genin wrapped around him as tight as those small but strong arms. He takes a moment to close his eyes, feeling his fast beating heart. Slowly, he took his hand moving it to her shoulder.

"Sakura"

"Go home" he says breaking the warm hug before staring at the girl infront of him, inches apart.

"Sasuke-kun.. I really want you to know that I-"

"Go home, Sakura" as cold as ice, Sasuke stares deep into her green eyes, he can see tears falling down her cheeks. She slowly pushes herself away, looking down, trying hard to distance herself from him before turning away. She gives him one last look, hoping he would say one word, just one word, 'Stay'. Sakura starts to run as fast as she could when that man doesn't respond as she hoped.

Sasuke stares at her shadow, gritting his teeth to ease a pain he is so used to by now, a sharp prick in his chest. The pain is proof and he knows what it meant. He knows.. he cares.

A lot.

---

A year passes by and Sasuke is now in Konoha after being summoned by the Hokage, Kakashi because of some trouble in the village. He has been staying for a week, and everything is the same as it always has except..

He hasn't seen Sakura. He isn't sure if she's just busy at the hospital performing some surgery he can't even pronounce or she is successfully trying hard to avoid him.

Thanks to Naruto, he got news less than a year ago that Sakura declined the marriage proposal, and is currently working hard to open her own Children Clinic.

He can still remember seeing her running around the hospital hallway in emergencies, wearing her white coat, watching her hands glowing with chakra. Her forehead would be filled with beads of sweat, worried expression never leave her face, not until she can save a patient. That face would immediately change bright and cheerful once that small machine beside her patient starts to beep again.

Sakura loves what she does so much, he thinks to himself with a smile. As much as he tries to deny it, Sasuke knows how much that woman changed ever since he left for his revenge. She became so strong, so matured and very determined especially when it comes to things she loves. Anyone who is sane enough would want to make her a life partner, he smirks as he remembers Sakura's marriage proposal the villagers were so hyped up about a year ago.

'Ring' his thought is distracted by the doorbell sound. It takes Sasuke seconds to open his door and the figure infront of him brings some weird feeling in his stomach.

"Sakura"

"I.. um.." he watches her stutter before she looks at him in the eyes, and Sasuke swears he can see flame in them.

"I was passing by his office and Kakashi-sensei asked me to give these to you" Sasuke takes the scrolls from her hands and replies with a short "Aaa"

"Then. I'm going. Good day" she says with a formal bow and turns around

"Sakura" he sees her jolt at her name being called. Sasuke pauses and thinks of the things he always wanted to say to her, ever since that day when he sees her tears for the first fime after years. He opens his mouth slightly but changes his mind.

"Thank you" he says.

Sakura replies with a simple nod and walks away. Sasuke can't help but stare at her figure from behind until she can no longer reach his sight. He looks at the scrolls in his hand and sigh.

"I'm sorry, Sakura. Its better this way" he whispers to himself.

---

"Take care, idiot. Sorry I can't see you off tomorrow" Naruto says with a soft punch on his shoulder.

"Nah, its fine. Thanks" he replies short. Naruto is about to walk home when Sasuke calls him again before saying.

"Take care of Sakura"

He sees Naruto pause and scoff before turning away and wave his hand. Sasuke stares at the sky, wondering if she will come to see him off like she always do tomorrow. Thinking whether she will ask him if she can come along, as she does everytime he wants to start his journey again.

Probably not, he thinks. It is never the same anymore now. Whenever Team 7 hangs out, Sakura will either be joining them late, or excuse herself very early giving ward rounds in the morning as an excuse. It is never her fault though. It is his. It has always been his.

Sasuke is about to close the door to his apartment when he sees a familiar girl walking silently towards his direction. There's that weird feeling in his abdomen again, he isn't comfortable but he doesn't hate it.

"Sasuke-kun" she says upon reaching infront of him.

A long pause.

"I- I just want to say goodbye. And goodluck on your travel tomorrow" she smiles to him brightly, but he can see pain in her eyes. He replies with a short thank you and expects to see her turning away to walk home. But she just stays there silently, its as if she is trying to battle her own thoughts. Sasuke is about to ask when he feels a pair of warm lips on his. His eyes widen as he feel her hands gripping his shirt, and later after a short second, she lets go.

"What happened a year ago.. I-it was never your fault, Sasuke-kun. I know you have been blaming yourself this whole time. So please, just stop it.."

"Enough is enough.." she said slow. He can't stop wondering if she heard him talk with Naruto that day.

"I can't keep doing this, Sasuke-kun. I love you so much. Please, just.. if there's a little space for me in your heart.. even if its just a little.. I beg you, stop blaming yourself" Sakura starts to cry, softly. Those tears had always been his weakness. No matter how much he tries to ignore that one fact, he knows he can't anymore. And right now, he knows more than anyone, that he can't deny this, whatever it is that he has towards her, that has been haunting him for as long as he can remember.

"Damn it, Sakura.. you annoy me to this point" he says facing down. After a brief second, he pulls her into his arm, and presses his lips against hers. Sakura is shocked but it doesn't take long for her to lean in and dippen the kiss. Before she can put her arms around his neck, Sasuke pulled away.

His dark orbs stares at her, his eyes full of longing. There is confusion in hers though, but another thing they both have in common, is wanting more. He gently grabs her hand as a sign to invite her into his apartment and she replies with a warm smile and a pink flush on her cheek.

---

Sasuke stares at her back while she puts her headband on her pink locks. The silence is for a while now but it is not uncomfortable. He sees her looking at the floor for a long while before starting to talk.

"I- I'm sorry.. if I suddenly came over last night" he is about to reply but she continues while turning around to face him.

"I know you.. said no to me so many times.. and.."

"A girl shouldn't be like this, right..?" She chuckles softly but tears starting to form in her green eyes. It takes her only a few seconds to sob and cry like a baby.

"Why can't I just forget you and move on?" Her cries starting to sound like a whisper. Sasuke looks at her wiping her tears off her face but later forming more tears. He was never a sweet-gestured guy, romance is one of the many things he didn't want to get involved with. He never knows how to calm a crying woman, so he just look and starts to reply.

"I wanted you to be happy, Sakura"

"I wasnt sure you'd be happy with me"

"You deserve someone better than me, I hurt you too many times"

"I was ready to let you go"

He says softly while looking at her starting to calm down.

"But a part of me.. wanted to be selfish. And make you mine"

He continues, their eyes still staring at each other. Sakura sees it in his eyes, his eyes speak better than his words. But now that he made it clear, she is more sure. Her orbs become more gentle and she smiles to him ever so brightly.

"Be selfish, Sasuke-kun" She says stroking his cheek softly. Resting her forehead on his, Sakura softly carress his lips with her thumb.

"That way I can be selfish too"

- E N D -

Hnggh I wish I can write better but oh well, goodnight 😂💕

》 My poor soul needs more Sasusaku angst, feel free to reply with more angst sasusaku fanfic 😍

#sasusaku #sasusakumonth #uchiha sasuke #uchihafamily #haruno sakura #sasusaku fanfic #sasusaku doujin #sasusaku fanart #sasusaku angst

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