#no more racism and fucked up dark family dynamics

[spacedace]

Fuck whatever DC is doing with the al Ghul's characterizations and story lines, I've decided that from now on the al Ghul's are gonna be DC's version of the Addams Family instead.

Now I don't mean just give the various al Ghul's the exact personalities of the various Addams and call it a day. That's boring, that erases all the interesting parts of the al Ghuls, that's just using "find & replace" and not actually adding anything. I mean give them the vibes of the Addams Family.

Keep the al Ghul's as the al Ghul's with all their scheming and machinations and world domination attempts but give them all the unhinged energy, the casually insane view of the world, the deranged levels of love and devotion for family. Make them that group where objectively they are batshit insane but also you cannot argue with the fact that they are indisputably the most stable and functional family in the entire universe.

They're creepy, they're kooky, they're mysterious and spooky. Ra's many opulent homes and impenetrable fortresses are a museum and the al Ghul's really are a screa-um whenever people come to see-um (or when they lay waste upon their enemies in a surprise attack that has been planned for months and is just the first domino in a series that will ultimately lead to achieving a far greater goal).

They all love each other and want each other to be happy, they express this primarily with stabbing and murder attempts (its fine, death is a thing that happens to other people).

And forget the League of Assassins being a cult. Just make the whole vast globe spanning organization a collection of cousins/aunts/uncles/dear old friends ect. No one (not even the al Ghuls, if they cared to keep track of such things) is sure who is actually related to them and who just got absorbed into the ever expanding family tree based on their vibes being right.

(Is Sensei Ra's father you ask? Well he's certainly someone's father - probably.

Anyway have you heard about Cousin Cheshire? Despicable poisoner of a young woman, capable of the most horrific things imaginable - yes she is the sweetest dear. Like I was saying though, she just had a baby!

Everyone in the family is just so excited to throw a baby shower to celebrate! Ubu has really gone all out with the spike traps, he does so love getting to welcome a new addition to the family.

Talia of course has cultivated a brand new strain of the most toxic plants imaginable to make a brand new kind of necrotizing poison. You know, as a nice little romantic gift for Cousin Cheshire and that young man of hers. It really is so important to make sure you take time for you and your partner to go on dates and have a few pitched battles to the death on dark rooftops in the pounding rain when you have children.

Now there is some to-do about it all of course, you know how family get together can be. Everyone is arguing over who should get to give little Lian her first weapon and what it should be. Nyssa is pushing for grenades but Ra's is insisting on a sword - he's traditional like that you know - but Dusan has the vote so far on throwing knives. You know the kind that have the little divots along the edges of the blades them to make it easier to get the poison you dip them in to stick.)

I'm just saying that the al Ghuls should be a delightful cross between the Bond Villains they were originally conceived as and the lovingly unhinged Addams Family. It just feels correct in my heart.

(Again keep the interesting aspects of the characters and the nuances of who each of them are like their drive to save the world through destroying humanity and their strong environmentalist leanings and their constantly playing 5D chess and everything, but like, take away the racism and the cartoonishly evil for no reason bullshit and give them some fun feral energy to go along with it).

[wormbloggign]

i love that brian is your favorite and you've immediately picked up that hes kind of a lame teenager who's prone to golden retriever behavior about the girl he likes and incoherent word vomit, because vast portions of readers 1. buy into his "i am a cool professional adult man guy, and not a teenager with problems" act and 2. underrate and ignore him. when you get to around arc 4 there's gonna some word of god from wildbow about his backstory you should read bc wb (probably due to the racism) fails to ever mention it in the story despite it being literally foundational for understanding his character in full

from what i've seen his family dynamic is honestly really tragic, especially his mums drug habits (ive had family who've fallen into that stuff and it really hurts seeing someone systematically destroy their life). its clear he was forced by the people around him into becoming the adult in the room from an early age, after so long it becomes second nature in him to take control of a situation, like you see in snare (act 13) where he begins leading taylors plan and forcing himself to be in harms way rather than others -he does this a lot actually, its harder to pick up on because we can see with taylors bug eye view system but whenever he shrouds his team in darkness for a tactical advantage, he functionally removes their ability to see, hear and smell which forces them to rely on him and follow his lead- the scene where he got fridged was devastating because the most effective thing he could do in that situation until divine* intervention was NOTHING, he had to take a passive role there.

its really disheartening how frequently he gets shunted in the story outside of the romance subplot with taylor (which i dont really see happening, because what he needs in a partner is clearly very different from who taylor is as a person, also lisa has way more romantic chemistry with taylor) which sucks because when we do get to see his story, its really fucking interesting

i do need to ask tho, where do i find the word of god from wildbow? ive been avoiding stuff like the comment section and most fandom stuff bc of potential spoilers

[dhr-ao3]

Twisted | HP

Twisted | HP https://ift.tt/fRQ0VHE by Kashmira_Writes 𝚃𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍 (𝚊𝚍𝚓) --------𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚞𝚗𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚊𝚗𝚝.   𝖯𝗁𝗂𝗇𝖾𝖺𝗌 𝖭𝗂𝗀𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗎𝗌 𝗎𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖺𝗒 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗒 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗒𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗆𝗒𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿   ❝ ᴍʏ ᴍɪɴᴅ ɪꜱ ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ ᴀᴄʜɪʟʟᴇꜱ ʜᴇᴇʟ ❞   In which, the marauders era and pureblood houses watch the lives of Antares Melania Black and Harry James Potter and see the horrors they have faced   OR   In which, the past has been given a golden opportunity to correct their mistakes and make things right.   _________________ a harry potter/ marauders era fix-it with classic watching and reacting trope a little more centered towards pureblood politics, dark magic, dark faction houses, forbidden love with happy endings and fucked up family dynamics. Words: 1043, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, marauders- Fandom Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/F, F/M, M/M, Other Characters: Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Sirius Black, Regulus Black, Orion Black, Walburga Black, Bellatrix Black Lestrange, Andromeda Black Tonks, Narcissa Black Malfoy, Abraxas Malfoy, Ted Tonks, Rabastan Lestrange, Rodolphus Lestrange, Lucien Lestrange, Arcturus Black III | Sirius Black's Grandfather, Melania Macmillan Black, Pollux Black, Cassiopeia Black, Alphard Black, Black Family (Harry Potter), Marauders (Harry Potter), Lily Evans Potter, James Potter, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, Evan Rosier, Amelia Bones, Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Regulus Black/Original Female Character(s), Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter/Original Female Character(s), Orion Black/Walburga Black, Arcturus Black III | Sirius Black's Grandfather/Melania Macmillan Black, Rabastan Lestrange/Original Female Character(s), Black family & therapy, Better yet - Relationship, this author& therapy Additional Tags: Regulus Black In Love, with a muggle, Glacia Black is a literal ray of sunshine, Sunshine character/grumpy character, yeah that's them, Sirius Black is So Whipped, for his werewolf bestie, Remus Lupin is Bad at Feelings, Remus Lupin Needs a Hug, Don't worry sirius will give it to him...and maybe even more, Bellatrix has mommy and daddy issues, Andromeda just has daddy issues, Sirius black is a issue, Nah Sirius got mommy issues, But so does glacia, Black Family Drama (Harry Potter), Black Family-centric (Harry Potter), Dysfunctional Black Family (Harry Potter), Sirius Black/Remus Lupin In Love, yeah there is chaos, so much chaos but i'm adding more chaos, Rabastan Lestrage/ muggle born witch, Lestrange Sr. lives for drama, Abraxes Malfoy lives for scheming and money, Arcturus Black just lives to solve his family drama, Everybody in Black family got some kind of issues, but they get solved, so does their magical racism, Character Development, Glacia Black is the glue of the Black family via AO3 works tagged 'Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy' https://ift.tt/UZpbGwM May 02, 2023 at 10:12AM

[vent-i-lattes-and-bones]

This is a vent blog, obviously.

If you think you know my main or any of my other blogs, you don't. This is a side blog where im very vulnerable and annoymous and id perfer to keep it that way. If your looking for dirt on me for a different blog, please have some decency and go get it somewhere else.

Just call me latte and im 21 yrs old. Im in a relationship, nonbinary/two spirit, intersex, butch bisexual, native, mentally ill and both physically and mentally disabled with chronic pain. I go by he/ey/xhey pronouns.

Im 5'6, Cw:218-225, sw:170, gw:160-150, ugw: 130-120

I AM NOT PRO-ED, PRO-ANA, TH1NSP0 OR PRO-SH. IM JUST SUFFERING FROM AN ED. Im pro-for me not for you. Every body shape is beautiful,its just not something i want for myself. I may occationally reblog th1nsp0 but its for myself. My blog may trigger other people's eating disorders so if you dont have an ed or dont wanna be triggered, dont follow me. Please dont report my safe space, just block me or something.

My list of shit to do other than eating

My intersex disorder partnered with the fact im disabled and cant get up and run causes me to gain weight. The multiple mental illnesses dont help.

I have: Ra, (potential)Pots, pseudo seizures, adhd, autism, bpd, ocd, (potential) schizoaffective, Osdd/did, some kind of eating disorder, anxiety, depression, (c-)/ptsd, age regression and some sort of nervous system thing.

Im also a potential budding alcoholic. I vape but its just vapor and not nicotine. Yes i know alcoholism can make you heavier and no i dont care.

If you wanna say nice things in my inbox, id appreciate it. If you wanna start shit, do it somewhere else please. Please dont vent to me, if im active here, im not in the place to help someone else and your woes will make it worse.

Dni if your proana/fatphobic/proed, pro-sh/suicide, pedo/zoo/necro, pro-para(as in think they dont need help, they should be able to give into their desires AT ALL and think they should be proud of it), trans-x fuckers, endos/supporters, and other standard shit like terfs/lgbtphobes/nbphobes, trumpers/centrists/racists, ableists, truscum/transmeds, anti-xenogenders/neopronouns.

I will also block based on PURELY vibes. Screenshotting my blog will also get you auto-blocked.

I post nsfw stuff about myself and my sex life sometimes so minors should generally stay away but if it fucks with you to hear about that stuff, i mostly hide it under read mores so dont look if you dont want sexual tmis.

Below the cut is the things you could find my venting about. Tw for basically everything, its a list of the horrible shit in my horrible life

Vents may include content of or related to:

Eating disorders

Domestic abuse

Religious abuse(christianity)

Child abuse

Csa

Cocsa

Physical abuse

Emotional abuse

Verbal abuse

Mental abuse

Sexual abuse

Medical abuse

Rape

Sexual assualt

Transphobia

Interphobia/Perisexism/intersexphobia

Racism

Homophobia/biphobia

Ableism

Allism

Racism

Intrusive thoughts

Intrusive fantasies

Pedophilia(im not a pedo, im a victim of them)

Incest( im not pro-incest)

Swearing

Gore

Spiraling(ocd)

Obsessions

Harmful system dynamics

Forgiving abusers( you dont have the right to judge me)

Beaten wife complexes

Self harm

Suicidal thoughts and ideation

Negative symphtoms of my mental and physical issues

Self-depreciation/bad talk of self

Resentment/revenge

Graphic descriptions of dark thoughts

Basically all the fun stuff involved in someone with severe mental illness not giving a shit about themselves and others due to repetitive abuse and melancholy. Im only even half serious when i talk about hurting myself.

I have not nor will ever be a threat to those around me so please dont report my posts venting anger towards my friends/family/pets/strangers or loved ones. Im not serious and im just letting out what ive been keeping in in word form. Im not a threat and i wont hurt anybody so please have respect for that.

The posts im not ok with being rbed will be tagged as #do not reblog. If you reblog it, i will block your ass and report the shit out of you. If it gets too bad,ill just turn off reblogs.

[ukiyokki]

mars reads too much dreamnotfound fanfiction for their own good

a dreamnotfound fanfic recommendation list by your resident dumbass (me)

this took way to fucking long... i’m tired

below is a (very extensive) list dedicated to all my favorite dnf fics, ranging from quick one shots to 100k+ word monstrosities that devour the storage on my computer, forever incomplete masterpieces to ongoing works of art, you get the idea. i provided links for each fic/series for your reading pleasure. there will be no smutty/nsfw fics on this list, that’s just not my vibe lmao. this list goes in no particular order, and i’ll update it from time to time when i feel like it. now, without further ado, let us begin.

Heat Waves (complete) by tbhyourelame

(wtf else did you expect, looking at a dnf rec list?) amazingly well written, and while it’s not my favorite dnf fic it’s damn near close. in the midst of a brutal heatwave, a suffering dream comes to terms with the fact that he is desperately in love with his best friend. everything i could say about this fic has already been said by nearly everyone who’s read it, so if you haven’t yet caved into the hype, just go for it. you won’t be disappointed.

Gonna be around (completed) by georgescatcafe

(mc irl) my favorite dnf oneshot to date. just read it, i don’t wanna spoil for you :)

Inferno in the Sky (ongoing)by zairielon

(star wars au) an ongoing star wars au currently clocking in at almost 200k words. need I say more? everything about it absolutely slaps, each chapter is amazingly written, and it’s just good. also, can we just appreciate dream and tubbos dynamic in here? 10/10, amazing, must protecc. oh right, a summary: george, an exiled padawan turned engineer, must return to the jedi temple after attacks on it from an unknown assailant threaten the safety of himself and the other jedi.

Like Magic (ongoing) by KangarooKen, NotGra55 (Gra55)

(harry potter au) the unofficial official dnf harry potter au. we watch the young unlikely wizard pair grow up together throughout their years at hogwarts as they battle good old fashioned wizard racism. beautifully written, incredibly fun and suspenseful, and just an overall blast and a half.

GeorgeNotFound, Son of Poseidon, and the League of Minor Gods (ongoing) by Clichewho_69, Cygnvs, Trash_Kinggg

(percy jackson au) percy jackson au? check. “road trip” (technically quest but u get what i mean)? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. this fic follows the plot of the lightning theif (albeit loosely), but everything is explained enough where you don’t have to read percy jackson to understand what’s going on. basically after moving to the usa, george gets taken to camp halfblood where he learns that a) gods exist. b) he’s the son of poseidon and c) he needs to prove that he didn’t steal zeus’s master bolt.

Protected (completed) by aenqua

(royalty/camelot au) my favorite piece of dnf media of all time. dubbed the official dnf camelot au, where dream is the heir to the throne and george is a servants son with a secret that couldp get him killed. these childhood friends grow up together and learn trust, love, and acceptance. (that summary did not justice to the masterpiece that is this fic) here’s the directors cut

The Hunter (completed) by HederEgo

(mc irl) a choose your own adventure fic with 13 different endings, where dream the hunter must kill george and stop him from beater the ender dragon. enough said.

The official dream team cowboy AU (series)(ongoing) by antsu_in_my_pantsu

(cowboy au) cowboys and outlaws horses and shit. and the big gay. it’s a cowboy au, what else did you expect? fucking yee haw (all seriousness this is a great read, i loved it so so so so much and i can’t wait for the final chapter to release).

This is a Drista moment, let's just accept it (completed) by Qekyo

dnf fic from drista pov. considering its unique perspective, it’s perfectly done. beautifully showcases a sibling relationship through drista and her memories/moments with dream, and it just works, y’a know? also drista supremacy.

Dear Dream (completed) by Qekyo

(wwii au) i don’t cry when watching/reading anything sad. translation: i’m a heartless bitch. however, this fic is the only exception. it caused me to cry so hard my mom walked in my room and asked if i was ok. ‘nuff said.

TECHNOlogical Wingman (completed) by Closeted_Bookworm

techno is the autocorrect ai on dreams phone, and he gains sentience. interesting concept, and the author fucking nailed it. great fic.

It Was Only a Fic (ongoing) by imagineitdear

dream starts reading a dnf fanfic (we’ve all been there buddy).

Teacher’s Pet (ongoing) by niyuha

(teacher au) in which dream is a high school english teacher and george is the new comp sci teacher in room 297.

Saltwater Secrets (ongoing) by earlgay_milktea

(mermaid/high school au) a great example of the shear amount of variety in fics this fandom has to offer. when i started reading dnf fics i would have never thought i’d find one about a mermaid george hopelessly crushing on his human friend, who happens to be his schools star swimmer. yet here i am, and i am far from disappointed.

Smash My Heart (incomplete) by dontrollthedice

george and sapnap are commentators for duper smash brothers tournaments, and george develops a crush on an up and coming smash streamer named dream.

roleplaying in the dark is harder than it seems (completed) by Alienu

laser tag. 10/10

solar system (completed) by quartzfia

(mc irl) george vists dream in pandora’s vault.

Ramblings of a Lunatic (completed) by jungkooksfic

ahh communicating through a notebook left on a shelf in a bookstore- what a perfect way to start a relationship.

Paint me like your French Girls (It's Charcoal, Actually) (completed) by Turtle_ier

(artist au) george is an art student, and dream is a model.

00:00:00 (completed) by isleofdreams

(soulmate au) 00:00:00 is the moment you meet your soulmate, as indicated but the clock ticking down on your wrist until the moment you meet. i’m not a fan of soulmate aus; this fic is the exception.

Blue Skies Smilin' At Me (completed) by kivy

(artist au) i don’t usually cry while reading stuff, but this brought me damn near close. george is a painting conservator and chats it is with the ghost of the artist if the painting he is working on. they fall in a love.

Current Location (incomplete) by hendollana

(influencer au) george simps for a hot american instagram model. who knew he’d actually follow back?

The Withering (series) (series ongoing, 1 work completed) by App1e_Juice

(mc irl) lore and world building and fight scenes and everything i crave. what’s not to love? something starts making the plants and crops around dreams village wither, and must team up with new friends to find the cause of the mysterious disease plaguing the land.

Minecraft, But You Can't Leave (complete) by facadecake

(mc irl) dream and george are sucked into their own private minecraft world together and must beat the game to escape.

Free The Game, Beat the End (incomplete) by goatgoatwasfound

(mc irl) a glitch in minecraft causes thousands of players from around the world to be trapped inside minecraft, with only one way of escape- beating the ender dragon. first dnf fic i ever read, and it’s still 10/10 for me.

Why don't you come a little closer? (completed) by lifeofandoms

george gets stood up by a date, and Dream pretends he’s the date to save george from the embarrassment. simply adorable.

lightning bug (completed) by saintachesP

(band au) while on tour, dream realizes his feeling for george.

Hold me closer (completed) by Treesofmyheart

(mc irl/dsmp) i just,, really like this trope.

Dizzy on caffeine (completed) by GleamingGreenGoggles

(coffee shop au) best dnf coffeeshop au i’ve read. periodt.

living a life of crime isn’t always easy (series) (completed) by itisjosh

(mafia/assassin au) stockholm syndrome except it’s not weird.

Inhibitions Make Interesting Situations (completed) by Ship_On_The_Sea

i pissed myself laughing. it’s just a dream and george being hilariously dense, flustered idiots. serotonin central.

thy eternal summer shall not fade (completed) by gracequills

(high school au) that moment when you recite shakespeare to your crush in your ap lit class instead of confessing (hate it when that happens).

All is Fair in love and Football (ongoing) by graciegirl2001

(college au) #1 favorite college au. in which george is a cheerleader, and dream is the football teams rising star player. this one gets extra points because of the amazing karlnap moments sprinkled throughout. *chefs kisses air*

online love (completed) by andbutso

(high school au) online classes go zoooooooom

Can’t help falling (completed) by isleofdreams

dream re-learns the guitar to sing to george on his birthday. beautiful. fluffy. amazing

dance in the rain and my arms (completed) by lazy_kitkat

george is a rain god, and dream is a wind god

Weather Boy (completed) by DaintyDiizzle

wouldn't you like to know, weather boy? (where dream can control the rain)

The color orange (completed) by anon

(mc irl) dream describes the colors of a sunset

Family Mode (completed)by Strawberry_flavoured_tears

they’re dads :,)

Breathing Room (incomplete) by papercranes

(band an) an amazing band au. the mad lad author wrote original songs for each chapter. above and beyond, mad props :). unfortunately, it’s incomplete

Piece of Clay (completed) by carbonbrine

(artist au) george is a sculptor and his sculpture comes to life- but oh no he’s hot.

Try (completed) by Not4typicalwriter

(royalty au) george must choose a suitor, but none of them are up to dream, his head knights, standards. or dream is hella jelly. also protective dream is perfect

When the Roses Bloom (completed) by HederEgo

(royalty au) close second for my favorite fic. go to royalty au for a quick serotonin bost. it’s all fluff and flowers and crushes, and i love it. criminally underrated.

Heavenstruck (ongoing) by dontrollthedice

george is dreams guardian angel, and dream want to find out more about him and his past life. bittersweet :,)

Bang and Burn (completed) by App1e_Juice

(spy au) george accidentally falls for target number 1 on sapnap’s secret agency’s hit list. this ones great, i love me a spy au :)

Can I get a uhh… (completed) by lemonskies

dream keeps pulling up to the drive through mcdonald’s that george works at drunk.

Pretty Stranger (completed) by anon

when looking for dream in the terminal, george sees a cute guy and decides to flirt.

Take my Hand (completed) by latinbias

(royalty au) another royalty au? poggers. surprise twists? double poggers. love this a lot.

seconds, minutes, hours, lifetimes (complete) by meridies

ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP ROAD TRIP *inhales to compose herself* roadtrip au. unrequited love, ignored feelings, longing, pining, you know the drill. absolutely love this one, its the best roadtrip au i have ever read, in any fandom. (maybe cause i identify with it a little too much, but thats not important. whats important is that you read this fic. right now. im waiting).

Message redacted (complete) by justyouraverageloser

(text fic) dream asks for a girls number and realises hes been given the wrong number. however, an unexpected relationship starts to form between him and the stranger on the other end of the line.

the waves (completed) by anon

(mc irl) this fic was written by the same anon who wrote the color orange, which is up there on my fav dnf oneshot list. dream and george know they have a higher purpose. they don’t know where they came from, or why they are seemingly the only humans in the world, or how they feel about eachother, or even where the skeletons come from, but they are sure of one thing: they have to beat a dragon.

The Dream Doll (completed) by PeppDream (Pep_Pizza)

(voodoo i guess) i’m a real big fan of fics with really out there or unique concepts, so naturally this one makes the cut! i really liked it, it’s really sweet and made me think a lot about what matters to me in the world. george finds a strange doll in an antique shop, and would really like to just stuff it in a drawer and forget about it. sadly (?), the doll has other plans.

last updated February 6th, 2021

[js589]

The Grand AWAE Gilbert Blythe Rant

So, if you've exchanged DMs with me about a piece of media, chances are that I have at some point gone off on some kind of critical tangent (okay, rant) about it.

I do that a lot. Not because I don't love what I'm talking about, but because I love critically engaging with media. No piece of media is perfect, and no fandom or person or character is perfect. And honestly, I think more of us need to sit with that idea that "I really love this thing" and "this thing could and should have done better in regards to this topic" can coexist for many pieces of media. Not all, mind you. But we're not digging in that trash heap.

Because it's one of the fandoms I am currently most involved in, the focus of a lot of my critical DMs focuses on Anne With an E. Love the show to bits. It's wonderful in a lot of ways.

But man oh man, do I really not love the positioning of Gilbert Blythe as a perfect feminist and unshakable ally. Gilbert does have flaws, and ones I wish the show explored if it was really that keen on him as a deuteragonist. There are also bits of his story that I wish had gone differently. (Though whatever changes I'd have liked, Bash needs to stay in his life. I adore their dynamic and I love Bash on his own merit. The whole Hanford-Lacroix blended family, really. With Mary alive, which is another bone I have to pick with this show. I want to post about that, too, but in this post, I will focus on Gilbert.)

Before we begin, bear in mind that these are my thoughts and mine alone, and that I am not any sort of professional or otherwise credentialed critic or scholar. (I say this not to pre-emptively absolve myself of errors or damage, but to say that this is an opinion piece and if I fuck up, it’s on me.) I am also NOT a Gilbert anti. (Or an LJZ anti. If you are here to complain about LJZ... No.) I am just a netizen with a phone and way too much time on their hands.

So... Gilbert. What's good about him? A lot, actually. He is clearly a kind and empathetic boy/young man. He's clever and hardworking and loyal to those he cares about. His actor is adorable and gets the job done. Any criticism I have of Gilbert is not due to his actor.

What's the criticism? Well, there are a few bits.

His color-blindness

Gilbert seems to operate on at least a type of color-blindness when it comes to race. While that means he doesn't assume anything negative about anyone just because of their skin color, it means he is also shockingly (I would say anachronistically but, full disclosure: I have done no research) naive to the fact that racism is actually exercised. Like, this kid is supposed to be well-traveled. Maybe that's only really been among people who look like him, but he's aware of the Bog. Literally aware of the slum. And he doesn't seem to think the people who live there deserve their conditions, and yet, he seems continually shocked when racism is pointed out to him or when he has to factor race into decisions. He is appropriately outraged, but he seems to be surprised that racism isn't just something that happens in dark alleys. He doesn't for a moment think that the factors limiting Bash's future are external, even as he seems to understand that it's not for lack of drive or desire on Bash's part. And when he reneges on his deal to stay with Bash for a year so Bash can learn to farm, he tells Bash to figure it out when Bash rightfully points out that pretty much nobody in Avonlea would help him. And while he puts Bash on the deed to show he's committed to his word later, 1) I imagine someone could try to contest that legally, and regardless of success, that exposes Bash to more people who don't like him, and 2) he doesn't... really apologize or verbalize that he's realized the error.

And for that second point, boy does it show in season 3! Of course, Bash is ready to and more capable of running the farm and the orchard, and he does have help from his family, but there is clearly still a stigma against Black people in Avonlea and the surrounding areas. The shopkeeper certainly isn't going to sell to him or his family! Of course, the Lyndes and the Cuthberts and MAYBE the Barrys might help, but still, that's not really a great solution. And if there is trouble that someone won't help with, how is Gilbert supposed to know quickly? Telegrams exist, of course, but whether he's at the Sorbonne or Toronto, that's a long travel back if his presence is required.

To give Gilbert the benefit of the doubt, maybe they worked all this out off-screen. But Bash's arguments with Hazel suggest that Gilbert (and Bash!) just seem to think it'll work out. Or maybe Bash just doesn't want to reveal his plans to his mom out of anger. Stranger things have happened…

The most frustrating thing is that the show does give us glimpses into these being possibly deliberate flaws! However, as I'll reiterate time and again, it did not take enough time to focus on one -ism, instead trying to tackle every possible issue of the day, achieving a surface-level victory on many, and deep-diving on practically none, which leaves a critically engaged audience thinking that at best, the attempts to tackle the issues are just a jumping-off point for more pondering, and at worst, performative. I don't like to think that this show was intentionally performative, but its time was certainly used less than ideally.

His other assumption problems

Does Gilbert understand he's not a mind reader?

Genuinely asking.

Maybe it's because he knows he's smart. Maybe it's because he's exhausted from trying to be an adult when he really should have had time to be a child. (And we'll get to that!)

But time and time and time and TIME AGAIN, Gilbert just… makes assumptions that don't make sense for him to make based on the world around him.

I'm not talking about the dance practice. Anne and Gilbert both run away there and given that I literally did the same with a crush in high school, I can't even say it's unrealistic. I'm not talking about the bonfire scene. The bonfire scene is probably its own essay. But at least Anne is saying something that is akin to "there's [no] chance for us", as he tells Bash. I will grudgingly admit that she does effectively babble that she can't choose him (and he shouldn't choose her) because of the opportunity he's been given.

That said, Gilbert does seem to take it a step farther and assume that Anne doesn't have feelings for him, instead of clueing into the bit where Winifred is involved. And like, how is it possible that he doesn't? HOW DOES THIS YOUNG MAN GET TO THE POINT OF GETTING PERMISSION FROM NIGEL ROSE TO PROPOSE WITHOUT REALIZING HE'S SERIOUSLY COURTING AND NOT JUST PLAYING AT IT?

Again, he seems to be semi-aware of this at times. Maybe he was just… expecting things to drag on a bit longer before that and he'd be able to summon the courage to speak to Anne in the interim. But given that he asks Winnie out for tea basically out of spite of Anne "rejecting" him on the train (Where, notably, Anne apologizes immediately! He's not honor-bound to accept, but like, wow, when he's in, he's in, and when he's out, he's out.), he knows what he's doing.

Regarding Anne, he also seems to think that she should understand how he's looking at her and what it means. He's known Anne for three years. They are (ostensibly—again, I have a bone to pick with the show about not actually showing this unless it's for drama) good friends. You'd think, somewhere in all that, he'd have noticed that Anne is, to put it kindly, oblivious. He's certainly aware when that changes! (Okay, maybe I'm a little sore about the dance practice. But again, I have no room to criticize there.)

I'm going to blow straight past "aRe YoU cHoPpInG oNiOnS?" because I literally just canNOT with that scene. I can't. It's bad, it's terrible, it's some really unfortunate foreshadowing that Gilbert will NOT clock to Anne's drunken state at the bonfire because he's angsting over the Winnie situation. (Which he also kind of is during the onions thing? He wants cufflinks to impress the Roses, remember.) Ironically, it's Anne who's angsting over the whole Winnie thing during their fair misunderstanding. The misunderstanding where Gilbert LITERALLY DITCHES HIS DATE TO COMFORT HIS *ahem* GOOD FRIEND WHO DOESN'T TALK AT ALL ABOUT THE THING HE THINKS SHE'S UPSET ABOUT BUT INSTEAD TALKS ABOUT HIS DATE. ALMOST AS IF SHE'S UPSET THAT SHE ISN'T HIS DATE.

AND THEN, this boy has the audacity to basically forget that he's courting Winnie and get upset when Anne doesn't also forget that during the porch scene. (Side note: that scene is SO FUCKING BEAUTIFULLY SHOT AND ACTED AND MY HEART BREAKS EVERY TIME.) Like, dude, THIS COULD BE SOLVED IF YOU JUST PICKED A GIRL. But nope, if he's not sure Anne wants him, he'll… almost marry someone else before having a last-minute epiphany that he can't, which only Winnie and Diana really chew him out for.

Anne, on the other hand… Oh god. The kiss.

Okay.

So.

I cheered just as loudly and obnoxiously as anyone when that kiss happened and then screamed when I realized that Shirbert was "solved" with literally 3 minutes to go in the show which was INCREDIBLY unsatisfying and I KNOW they didn't know they weren't getting more seasons but the pacing of season 3 was sorta kinda really SHIT and—

Ahem.

To address what I really want to address: Gilbert only knows that Anne wrote a note to him saying she loved him. In fact, he learns this information secondhand from Diana and doesn't seem to think that Diana might not have all the facts. Fortunately for him, her facts are correct, but she doesn't actually have all the facts and neither does he.

Neither of them know that Anne has spoken with Winnie and is thus apprised of the situation. So, when Gilbert rocks up to find Anne all hot and disheveled, he doesn't clear things up with her. He doesn't say "I need to tell you that Winifred and I are done and it's because I love you and I've been an idiot" before he kisses her. Maybe that's not to ruin the cinematic effect of the kiss, but he certainly doesn't say it after, either! If Anne hadn't run into Winnie, I expect she would have had questions.

Maybe that last bit would have been addressed in season 4, but I doubt it.

Story stuff

Okay, this is going to be a bit of a rapid-fire round.

His initial "let's not talk about Josie's assault" thing is half bad thing, half good thing. Why half good thing? Because it's a realistic flaw! This boy has flaws! And he kind of learns from them! He does talk to the class about Anne and everyone listens because it's him. That's… actually not bad. And he shows up as a friend for Anne in the rest of the episode which is super nice. It's just frustrating because he definitely saw Anne confronting Billy and didn't seem to think that maybe Anne had a point at first.

Now for the stuff that grinds my gears a little more:

Gilbert is an orphan, like Anne. Why? To make him "sad and handsome", as Ruby says? To give him more of an excuse to have a story? Bash could have entered his life in any number of ways; John didn't need to die for that, and Gilbert didn't need to be the handsome boy with the tragic backstory.

Gilbert is nearly always framed as the reasonable one in fights with Anne. I think this may be more of a fandom misogyny thing than an actual story thing, but even when Gilbert is being just as petulant and petty as Anne, it's always Anne who has to apologize, and always Anne who takes the heat in fandom.

Gilbert (and this is the big one) basically gets to avoid the fallout from everything and never looks bad. See last point about his arguments with Anne, and also the unfinished stuff with Bash, but also, he just fucks off to Toronto, leave Anne to deal with the fallout and gossip about Winnie, who seems pretty damn sure there will be some.

On the heels of both that last point and Gilbert being an orphan: Gilbert gets storylines and opportunities Anne should have had. He gets a rich love interest (who we KNOW he won't choose over Anne—they literally had to make her rich and perfect just to drive home the fact that he will never choose anyone over Anne no matter how many reasons he gets!) and, though Anne has the same test scores as he does, she curiously doesn't get the same college opportunities as he does. 

As I put it to @practicallyasleep, "godDAMN does this show reward Gilbert for being white and male". His few flaws are sort of glossed over where they're addressed at all. For a deuteragonist, or even a secondary main character, he's… not well-fleshed out. He's not given as much opportunity to have or demonstrate his growth. Instead, he's some kind of near-perfect male romantic lead sprung fully formed directly from Moira Walley-Beckett's head, and honestly, I think that does him a great disservice.

[my-tc-is-an-angel]

Intro post :)

Disclaimers:

I don't condone pedophilia and won't be making a move on H while still a minor at her school bc that would be a horrible thing to do

Nor do I condone bigotry, particularly transphobia, ableism, racism, antisemitism, islamophobia, misogyny, homophobia and others. Bigots, DNI

Use my goddamn pronouns

Who am I?

You can all call me L! My pronouns are he/they, I'm an english nerd (which is good bc that's what my tc teaches), I have cheese toasties for breakfast in the morning, I'm trans and use the specific term nonbinary trans man but if I were to truly describe my gender it'd be a 20,000 word dissertation.

Who is my tc?

I'll call her H. She uses she/her pronouns. She's an English teacher, taught me from September 2021 to January 2022 but has stepped back due to long COVID. She still works in my school and I come and chat to her once every couple of weeks (+she's in charge of English prefects and I'm going to apply soon !! ) but she doesn't teach classes above a certain age any more (if she misses school, having a substitute teacher matters a lot less for younger students). I miss seeing her but I'm glad she's doing what's necessary for her health and it's not like she's left the school.

She's so beautiful ajksjsksjkskjsj!!!!!!!!!!!! Her hair is beautiful + oh my god just the glossy waves aaaaaa, it's dirty blonde. She has blue-green eyes. She's roughly 5'2'' or 5'3'', a little shorter than me but she wears heels and I wear docs so it's hard to know what the true height difference is lol :))

I now know her age, the age gap isn't huuge but she's achieved so much in her life goddamn! She is in a relationship, so, I hope she's happy (it sounds like a boring relationship but if she's happy then who am I to judge?). I don't fully know her sexual/romantic orientation but she seems to have had the experience of not being accepted by her family (we were talking ab it) and my friend has seen pictures of her at Pride with the pansexual flag on her cheek. She also owns multiple pride flag bags and is very into diversity and is one of the most enlightened cis people I've ever met (vis a vis trans rights). So... make of that what you will.

She's funny as hell, has a dark sense of humour, sweet face and often wears red lipstick. H is honestly one of the funniest people I've met (or the best at making me laugh). I can't stress that enough. She has a lil star chart to keep track of how we're doing with homework and at the end of the year, she gives a gift basket with books and stationary to whoever has the most stars. I was in the lead (as I always did any extra homework she set with my best efforts)

How is our dynamic?

H has always been super helpful and kind: fighting to be able to use my correct name and pronouns; always listening to me and making time for me; just never not being so lovely towards me even when she's literally been ill.

H jokes with me a fair amount (although she jokes with everyone) but I'm anticipating some great inside jokes. I've only known her since September so not yet, haha.

She's 1000% comfy swearing in front of me which I hope means something good? We've bonded over shared trauma because our childhoods are scarily similar (we both had fucked up, morbid childhoods and used books as escapism)

She used emojis in an email to me which made me so happy! And in her xmas card, I said something about her humour being immaculate and apparently she was bragging ab it to my class when I missed a lesson which is honestly so cute :))))))))))))

When teaching me:

She occasionally caught me looking at her but not enough to be suspicious (I hope). She often ended up making snide/sarcastic remarks about the government bc in my country it's pretty terrible. Like, the child poverty rate is steadily climbing, etc. She's anti-capitalist which is a HUGE GREEN FLAG for me. I just wanna hug her and kiss her and hold her a-

She can't have gluten (like me) and once she brought in seperate biscuits for me during a biscuit lesson!!!! (yes, she does biscuit lessons)

[geshertzarmeod]

Favorite Books of 2020

I wanted to put together a list! I read 74 new books this year, and I keep track of that on Goodreads - feel free to add or follow me if you want to see everything! I’m going to focus on the highlights, and the books that stuck with me personally in one way or another, in approximate order. Also, all but two of them (#5 and #7 on the honorable mention list) are queer/trans in some way. Links are to Goodreads, but if you’re looking to get the books, I suggest your library, the Libby app using your library, your local bookstore, or Bookshop.

The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions by Larry Mitchell, illus. by Ned Asta (originally published 1977). I had a hard beginning of the year and was in a work environment where my queerness was just not welcomed or wanted. I read this in the middle of all of that, and it helped me so much. I took this book with me everywhere. I read it on planes. I read it on the bus, and on trains, and at shul. I showed it to friends... sometimes at shul, or professional development conferences. It healed my soul. Now I can’t find it and might get a new copy. When I reviewed it, in February, I wrote: “I think we all need this book right now, but I really needed this book right now. Wow. This book is magic, and brings back a sense of magic and beauty to my relationship with the world.” Also I bought my copy last July, in a gay bookstore on Castro St. in SF, and that in itself is just beautiful to me. (Here’s a post I made with some excerpts)

Once & Future duology, especially the sequel, Sword in the Stars, by A.R. Capetta and Cory McCarthy. Cis pansexual female King Arthur Ari Helix (she's the 42nd reincarnation and the first female one) in futuristic space with Arab ancestry (but like, from a planet where people from that area of earth migrated to because, futuristic space) works to end Future Evil Amazon.com Space Empire with her found family with a token straight cis man and token white person. Merlin is backwards-aging so he's a gay teenager with a crush and thousands of years of baggage. The book’s entire basis is found family, and it's got King Arthur in space. And the sequel hijacks the original myth and says “fuck you pop culture, it was whitewashed and straightwashed, there were queer and trans people of color and strong women there the whole time.” Which is like, my favorite thing to find in media, and a big part of why I love Xena so much. It’s like revisionist history to make it better except it’s actually probably true in ways. Anyway please read these books but also be prepared for an absolutely absurd and wild ride. Full disclosure though, I didn’t love the first book so much, it’s worth it for the sequel!

The Wicker King by K. Ancrum. This book hurt. It still hurts. But it was so good. It took me on a whole journey, and brought me to my destination just like it intended the whole time. The author’s note at the end made me cry! The sheer NEED from this book, the way the main relationship develops and shifts, and how you PERCEIVE the main relationship develops and shifts. I’m in awe of Ancrum’s writing. If you like your ships feral and needy and desperate and wanting and D/S vibes and lowkey super unhealthy but with the potential, with work, to become healthy and beautiful and right, read this book. This might be another one to check trigger warnings for though.

The Entirety of The Daevabad Trilogy by S.A. Chakraborty. I hadn’t heard of this series until this year, when a good friend recommended it to me. It filled the black hole in me left by Harry Potter. The political and mystical/fantasy world building is just *chef’s kiss* - the complexity! The morally grey, everyone’s-done-awful-things-but-some-people-are-still-trying-to-do-good tapestry! The ROMANCE oh my GOD the romance. If I’m absolutely fully invested in a heterosexual romance you know a book is good, but also this book had background (and then later less background) queer characters! And the DRAMA!!! The third book went in a direction that felt a little out of nowhere but honestly I loved the ride. I stayed up until 6am multiple times reading this series and I’d do it again.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon. I loved this book so much that it’s the only book I reviewed on my basically abandoned attempt at a book blog. This book is haunting, horrifying, disturbing, dark, but so, so good. The character's voices were so specific and clear, the relationships so clearly affected by circumstance and yet loving in the ways they could be. This is my favorite portrayal of gender maybe ever, it’s just... I don’t even have the words but I saw a post @audible-smiles​ made about it that’s been rattling in my head since. And, “you gender-malcontent. You otherling,” as tender pillow talk??? Be still my heart. Be ready, though, this book has all the triggers.. it’s a .

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender. This book called me out on my perspective on love. Also, it made me cry a lot. And it has two different interesting well-written romance storylines. And a realistic coming-into-identity narrative about a Black trans demiboy. And a nuanced discussion of college plans and what one might do after college. And some big beautiful romcom moments. I wish I had it in high school. I’m so glad I have it now! (trigger warning for transphobia & outing, but the people responsible are held accountable by the end, always treated as not okay by the narrative, and the MC’s friends, and like... this is ownvoices and it’s GOOD.)

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern. My Goodreads review says, “I have no idea what happened, and I loved it.” That’s not wrong, but to delve deeper, this book has an ethereal feeling that you get wrapped up in while reading. Nothing makes sense but that’s just as it should be. You’re hooked. It is so atmospheric, so meta, so fascinating. I’ve seen so many people say they interpreted this character or that part or the ending in all different ways and it all makes sense. And it’s all of this with a gay main character and romance and the central theme, the central pillar being a love of and devotion to stories. Of course I was going to love it.

Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl’s Confabulous Memoir by Kai Cheng Thom. “Because maybe what really matters isn’t whether something is true, or false. Maybe what matters is the story itself; what kinds of doors it opens, what kinds of dreams it brings.” This book was so good and paradigm shifting. It reminded me of #1 on this list in the way it turns real life experience and hard, tragic ones at that (in this case, of being a trans girl of color who leaves home and tries to make a life for herself in the city, with its violence), into a beautiful, haunting fable. Once upon a time.

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver. I need to reread this book, as I read it during my most tranceful time of 2020 and didn’t write a review, so I forgot a lot. What I do remember is beautiful and important nonbinary representation, a really cute romance, an interesting parental and familial/sibling dynamic that was both heartbreaking and hopeful, and an on-page therapy storyline. Also Mason Deaver just left twitter but was an absolutely hilarious troll on it before leaving and I appreciate that (and they just published a Christmas novella that I have but haven’t read yet!)

The Truth Is by NoNieqa Ramos. It took a long time to trust this book but I’m so glad I did. It’s raw and real and full of grief and trauma (trigger warnings, that I remember, for grief, death (before beginning of book), and gun violence). The protagonist is flawed and gets to grow over the course of the book, and find her own place, and learn from the people around her, while they also learn to understand her and where she’s coming from. It’s got a gritty, harsh, and important portrayal of found family, messy queerness, and some breathtaking quotes. When I was 82% through this book I posted this update: “This book has addressed almost all of my initial hesitations, and managed to complicate itself beautifully.”

Anger is a Gift by Mark Oshiro.  I wasn’t actually in the best mental health place to read this book when I did (didn’t quite understand what it was) but it definitely reminded me of what there is to fight against and to fight for, and broke my heart, and nudged me a bit closer to hope. The naturally diverse cast of characters was one of the best parts of this book. The romance is so sweet and tender and then so painful. This book is important and well-written but read it with caution and trigger warnings - it’s about grief and trauma and racism and police brutality, but also about love and community.

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden.  This is a sci-fi/fantasy/specfic mashup that takes place in near-future South Africa and has world-building myths with gods and demigoddesses and a trip to the world of the dead but also a genetically altered hallucinogenic drug that turns people into giant animals and a robot uprising and a political campaign and a transgender pop star and a m/m couple and all of them are connected. It’s bonkers. Like, so, so absolutely mind-breaking weird. And I loved it.

Crier’s War and Iron Heart by Nina Varela.  I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVED the amount of folktales they told each other with queer romances as integral to those stories, especially in Iron Heart. A conversation between the two leads where Crier says she wants to read Ayla like a book, and Ayla says she’s not a book, and Crier explains all the different ways she wants to know Ayla, like a person, and wants to deserve to know her like a person, made me weak. It lives in my head rent-free.

Queen’s Shadow by E.K. Johnston @ekjohnston . I listened to this book on Libby and then immediately listened to it at least one more time, maybe twice, before my borrow time ran out. I love Padmé, and just always wish that female Star Wars characters got more focus and attention and this book gave me that!! And queer handmaidens! And the implication that Sabé is in love with Padmé and that’s just something that will always be true and she will always be devoted and also will make her own life anyway. And the Star Wars audiobooks being recorded the way they are with background sounds and music means it feels like watching a really long detailed beautiful Star Wars movie just about Padmé and her handmaidens.

Sissy: A Coming of Gender Story by Jacob Tobia. I needed to read this. The way Tobia talks about their experience of gender within the contexts of college, college leadership, and career, hit home. I kept trying to highlight several pages in a row on my kindle so I could go back and read them after it got returned to the library (sadly it didn’t work - it cuts off highlights after a certain number of characters). The way they talk about TOKENISM they way they talk about the responsibilities of the interviewer when an interviewee holds marginalized identities especially when no one else in the room does!!! Ahhhh!!!

Bonds of Brass by Emily Skrutskie. Disclaimer for this one that the author was rightfully criticized for writing a Black main character as a white author (and how the story ended up playing into some fucked up stuff that I can’t really unpack without spoiling). But also, the author has been working to move forward knowing she can’t change the past, has donated her proceeds, and this book is really good? It has all the fanfic tropes, so much delicious tension, a totally unexpected plot twist that had me immediately rereading the book. This book was super fun and also kind of just really really good Star Wars fanfiction.

How To Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune. This book was so sweet, and cute, and hopeful, and both ridiculous and so real. I had some trouble getting used to Gus’ voice and internal monologue, but I got into it and then loved every bit after. The ace rep is something I’ve never seen like this before (and have barely read any ace books but still this was so fleshed out and well rounded and not just like, ‘they’re obsessed with swords not sex’ - looking at you, Once & Future - and leaving it there.) This all felt like a slice of life and I feel like I learned about people while reading it. Some of the moments are so, so funny, some are vaguely devastating. I have been personally victimized by TJ Klune for how he ends this book (a joke, you will know once you read it) but it also reminds me of the end of the “You Are There” episode of Xena and we all know what the answer to that question was.... and I choose to believe the answer here was similar.

You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson. I wish I had this book when I was in high school. I honestly have complicated feelings about prom and haven’t really been seeking out contemporary YA so I was hesitant to read this but it was so good and so well-written, and had a lot of depth to it. The movie (and Broadway show) “The Prom” wants what this book has.

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth. I never read horror books, so this was a new thing for me. I loved the feeling of this book, the way I felt fully immersed. I loved how entirely queer it was. I was interested in the characters and the relationships, even though we didn’t have a full chance to go super deep into any one person but rather saw the connections between everyone and the way the stories matched up with each other. I just wanted a bit of a more satisfying ending.

Honorable Mention: reread in 2020 but read for the first time pre-2020

Red White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. I couldn’t make this post without mentioning this book. It got me through this year. I love this book so much; I think of this book all the time. This book made me want to find love for myself. You’ve all heard about it enough but if you haven’t read this book what are you DOING.

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan @sarahreesbrennan​ . I reread this one over and over too, both as text and as an audiobook. I went for walks when I had lost my earbuds and had Elliott screaming about an elf brothel loudly playing and got weird looks from someone walking their dog. I love this book so much. It’s just so fun, and so healing to read a book reminiscent of all the fantasies I read as a kid, but with a bi main character and a deconstruction of patriarchy and making fun of the genre a bit. Also, idiots to lovers is a great trope and it’s definitely in this book.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book is forever so important to me. I am always drawn in by how tenderly Sáenz portrays his characters. These boys. These boys and their parents. I love them. I love them so much. This is another one where I don’t even know what to say. I have more than 30 pages in my tag for this book. I have “arda” set as a keyboard shortcut on my phone and laptop to turn into the full title. This book saved my life.

Last Night I Sang to the Monster by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book hurts to read - it’s a story about trauma, about working through that trauma, healing enough to be ready to hold the worst memories, healing enough to move through the pain and start to make a life. It’s about found family and love and pain and I love it. It’s cathartic. And it’s a little bit quietly queer in a beautiful way, but that’s not the focus. Look up trigger warnings (they kind of are spoilery so I won’t say them here but if you have the potential to be triggered please look them up or ask me before reading)

Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine.  When asked what my all time favorite book is, it’s usually this one. Gail Carson Levine has been doing live readings at 11am since the beginning of the pandemic shut down in the US, and the first book she read was Ella Enchanted. I’ve been slowly reading it to @mssarahpearl and am just so glad still that it has the ability to draw me in and calm me down and feels like home after all this time. This book is about agency. I love it.

Radio Silence by Alice Oseman @chronicintrovert . I’ve had this on my all-time-faves list since I read it a few years ago and ended up rereading it this year before sending a gift copy to a friend, so I could write little notes in it. It felt a little different reading it this time - as I get further away from being a teenager myself, the character voice this book is written in takes a little longer to get used to, but it’s so authentic and earnest and I love it. I absolutely adore this book about platonic love and found family and fandom and mental illness and abuse and ace identity and queerness and self-determination, especially around college and career choices. Ahhh. Thank you Alice Oseman!!!

Leia: Princess of Alderaan by Claudia Gray @claudiagray​ . I have this one on audible and reread it several times this year. I love the fleshing out of Leia’s story before the original trilogy, I love her having had a relationship before Han, and the way it would have affected her perspective. I also am intrigued by the way it analyses the choices the early rebellion had to make... I just, I love all the female focused new Star Wars content and the complexity being brought to the rebellion.

[ladykatebridgerton]

This might be a super super super unpopular opinion but I am actually not very happy with the casting of Kate in the series ..

I’ve no issue with them picking coloured or different ethnicity’d people, or whatever the term is for it (I’m not sure) for characters in the books, buuuut.. Kate Sheffield in the books is described as pale..

I’m worried that because they’re changing the character already, to please people who scream “racism” simply because they’re adhering to a book, they’re gonna change the rest of the character - her relationship with her sister, Edwina, her reason for being with Anthony, their whole rapport, the family dynamic.. I adore their relationship in the books, and now I’m scared they’re gonna fuck it up

It’s a very unpopular opinion and I debated not answering it because I just don’t want this negativity on my dash after such a glorious day. Sorry not sorry, but I just ... what do you gain by worrying before we’ve even seen her brought to life? Ultimately nothing. You claim it’s not a racial prejudice, but it sounds like it, it really does. 

And quite frankly, who the fuck cares if she’s described as pale?! Who the fuck cares that Daphne’s hair color isn’t the same as in the books? Like I swtg clinging to shit like this is really damaging. If the author doesn’t care, neither should you. 

We have far too many fair/pale skinned women in period dramas. These women have their representation. I have seen people say how Simone is too gorgeous to be unnoticed and spinster like, and that Edwina is supposed to be prettier, as we know of in the books, but really, Kate is described as beautiful in her own right. More than anything her differences are in how she behaves, it’s the way she cares herself, it’s also even the fact that she has dark hair and dark eyes instead of light, and traditional beauty standards, especially in 19th century always glorified the latter as ideal. And because she’s taller than Edwina who’s petite. 

Casting women of color (which Edwina and Mary will be too) does not equate to changing the story or characters. Like!? What suddenly she’s not pale so she’s gonna be mean to Edwina???  I just. You’ve really got to think this one through because there are lot of fucked up, toxic ideas you’re putting out there.

Anyway, I won’t tolerate any more asks like this so if you’re thinking of sending one, just know it’s getting deleted. There’s no way to justify this isn’t laced with racism.

[336-323bc]

now that ive collected my thoughts, in my humble opinion ginny and georgia tries to tackle too many issues such as distinctional family dynamics, teen angst, teen pregnancy, sex, mourning, self harm, racism, lgbt, murder, politics and on and on so much more to the point that it doesn't do any of these issues justice. Like I said, if you asked me I straight up couldn't tell you which one of the previously mentioned things this show is supposed to be about. It's just kind of everything and once and it sucks? Often times these will get mentioned once for a shock factor (ginnys self harm issue) or as a tool to move the plot forward (ginnys and hunters AWFUL argument) or just for no apparent reason at all (like abbys body image issues), and once they're mentioned they're either never discussed again or are discussed episodes and episodes later without really addressing them properly at all? for an example, they set up that abby's parents are divorcing, she's going through it, has a bad body image and the way they address/resolve these topics is in the scene where abby tells her friends that she's feeling shite, ginny tells her that she also has a shite life, abby slaps her, they laugh and that's it I'm not even kidding?

this show has a chronic problem of not addressing issues properly. for fucks sake when austin STABS A KID IN THE HAND georgia REFUSES and demonizes therapy which is like.. so bold for a series that tries to tackle so many topics that include trauma?

i can only think of two instances when dark topics are addressed properly: when georgia tells ginny that abuse didn't make her stronger AND when marcus recommends therapy to ginny (for which i grant him the title of the only sorta plausible character in this series), and both of these happen like ..episodes after these topics are mentioned.

Apart from all of that, the dialogue is cringey and clearly written by 40 year old men who think they know how teenagers talk and the story is wonky and goes everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

If you wanna watch a REALLY relatable teen drama, please please please stray away from all netflix abominations and watch SKAM <3 same topics, same issues, discussed properly and with respect, in a more realistic manner.

[battlestar-royco]

okay here it is, part 1 of my sci fi tv and movies rec list! i’ve split it up into 2, kind of by tone and theme. these recs are on the lighter side. part 2 is for fans of darker sci fi. i could’ve gone on tbh but i had to draw the line somewhere. it’s not perfect but i hope you find something you like that you haven’t heard of! full titles, trigger warnings, and diversity/general notes under the cut. ask box open for any more specific questions!

part 2/2

If you liked STAR TREK and STAR WARS:

Black Mirror: USS Callister: (tw: simulated child loss, brief torture) coworkers get trapped inside their boss’s Star Trek spoof video game. It’s led by a white woman but the entire cast is pretty diverse (Michaela Coel!!!) and it’s critical of white edgelords. Dark moments balanced with funny!

Firefly: (tw: sexual harassment in one episode, sex worker phobia, Joss Whedon-ness) I think this one is more well-known; a small space crew travels the solar system taking on any weird jobs they can get. Two leading WOC, a black man, one interracial relationship.

Avenue 5: (tw: some dark humor, language) Star Trek meets the Titanic. Funny! I’ll leave it at that. 3 leading WOC, a canonically pan main character in a poly and interracial relationship.

Black Mirror: Be Right Back: (tw: grief, partner loss) a woman’s SO dies and she simulates his resurrection through a software that scans his social media accounts. This one isn’t diverse but it’s an hour of Domhnall Gleeson, if he’s your thing!

Stargate: (tw: 90s/00s racism/sexism) tbh I haven’t watched most of the content but I’d say it’s on par with a Star Trek kind of thing. SGA stars two or three POC in a cast of like 7 regulars.

If you liked PACIFIC RIM:

Black Mirror: Hang the DJ: (tw: none that I can recall) a man and woman fall in love via dating app. It doesn’t have monsters, but it’s an incredibly charming episode that exhibits some of Black Mirror’s best qualities imo and I think people who like the Raleigh/Mako dynamic will like what these two have!! Interracial relationship between a black woman and a white man; black woman is blink-and-you-miss-it bi, but still canonically bi.

Cloverfield (tw: violence/blood, frequent flashes, shaky cam): found-footage flick about aliens attacking New York. Basic and not too diverse but it has the huge monster appeal and I like the found-footage aspect.

Edge of Tomorrow: (tw: VB) Groundhog Day alien apocalypse. it’s Tom Cruise buuuuut you get to see Emily Blunt at her most “I’ll end you”-est so like? Worth it I think??

Arrival: (tw: child loss) aliens come to Earth to offer something to the humans. A little slow, but definitely a different take and some cool-looking aliens.

The Host: (tw: child loss) A girl gets kidnapped by a huge river monster. it’s in Korean and all the characters are Asian. Directed by Bong Joon-ho and starring Kang-Ho Song and Bae Doona!! Plus environmentalist commentary.

If you liked MARVEL and DC:

Misfits: (tw: sex, language, violence, rape) imagine one of those superhero teams like the Avengers except they’re all criminals who’ve given up on life and don’t actually care about making the world a better place. Chaotic stupid energy. Two black leads :)

Push: (tw: a few bloody scenes) Chris Evans before Cap?? Dakota Fanning before Twilight? Secret government experiments and black ops superpower organizations? You love to see it!

Fast Color: (tw: past drug use referenced) superpowers that pass down from generation to generation in a family of black women. Need I say more? Need I say any fucking more?!?!

Sense8: (tw: child loss, grief, lots of nudity and sex, drug use, language, infidelity) 8 people around the world start experiencing each other’s lives and borrowing each other’s skill sets. This is probably THE most intersectional and diverse show I have ever seen. An international cast and setting that reaches almost every continent, leading trans lesbian, multiple QPOC. Truly incredible and one of my absolute favorites.

Jupiter Ascending: (tw: bees) I actually don’t really like this movie but I do think it has its appeal and I appreciate how much it is just unabashedly itself. Don’t take it too seriously! The cast is kinda wild too--Mila Kunis, Eddie Redmayne, Sean Bean, Channing Tatum!!! And it’s by the Wachowskis, AKA the two trans sisters who did The Matrix and Sense8!

If you liked THE HUNGER GAMES:

Gattaca: (tw: implied body modification, trichophobia, eugenics) in a society that discriminates against genes, a man with a heart condition assumes another’s identity in order to achieve his dream of becoming an astronaut. I love this movie. It’s very moody and soft with a really compelling dynamic between the two leading men which I’ve always read as gay.

Snowpiercer: (tw: VB, minor cannibalism) yet another winner from Bong Joon-ho, who’s surprised? All of humanity lives on a train in which all the cars are stratified by class. This is my favorite of all the movies from all the Chrises. Evans is by far my favorite Chris for this!!! It also features Octavia Spencer and Kang-Ho Song! Piping hot class war tea pre-Parasite.

V for Vendetta: (tw: torture, I don’t remember a lot of the details sorry!) I haven’t watched this movie in a minute so I don’t remember how much I actually liked it, but I thought it was worth mentioning because it’s a classic dystopian movie.

Children of Men: (tw: infertility, childbirth, VB) humanity has lost the ability to procreate for 2 decades until one day a resistance group discovers a pregnant woman. Holy crap so much extremely relevant and prescient commentary on immigration, race, class, and refugee crises!!!

Akira: (tw: disturbing imagery, objectification, nudity) I don’t really remember this one much either? But it’s Japanese, there’s biker gangs, and it’s super weird.

The 100: (tw: VB, kill your gays/POC trope, suicide, torture, child loss) 100 juvenile delinquents are dropped onto Earth and chaos ensues. I think most people know that this show is plagued with issues but it really does have a special place in my heart and I think it changed the conversation and standards re: the treatment of wlw in genre fiction. It starts off cheesy and slow but the stakes are SO high all the time and it’s full of thought-provoking ethical dilemmas.

[dillydedalus]

january reading

why does january always feel like it’s 3 months long. anyway here’s what i read in january, feat. poison experts with ocd, ants in your brain, old bolsheviks getting purged, and mountweazels. 

city of lies, sam hawke (poison wars #1) this is a perfectly nice fantasy novel about jovan, who serves as essentially a secret guard against poisoning for his city state’s heir and is forced to step up when his uncle (also a secret poison guard) and the ruler are both killed by an unknown poison AND also the city is suddenly under a very creepy siege (are these events related? who knows!) this is all very fine & entertaining & there are some fun ideas, but also... the main character has ocd and SAME HAT SAME HAT. also like the idea of having a very important, secret and potentially fatal job that requires you to painstakingly test everything the ruler/heir is consuming WHILE HAVING OCD is like... such a deliciously sadistic concept. amazing. 3/5

my heart hemmed in, marie ndiaye (translated from french by jordan stump) a strange horror-ish tale in which two married teachers, bastions of upper-middle-class respectability and taste, suddenly find themselves utterly despised by everyone around them, escalating until the husband is seriously injured. through several very unexpected twists, it becomes clear that the couple’s own contempt for anyone not fitting into their world and especially nadia’s hostility and shame about her (implied to be northern african) ancestry is the reason for their pariah status. disturbing, surprising, FUCKED UP IF TRUE (looking back, i no longer really know what i mean by that). 4/5

xenogenesis trilogy (dawn/adulthood rites/imago), octavia e. butler octavia butler is incapable of writing anything uninteresting and while i don’t always completely vibe with her stuff, it’s always fascinating & thought-provoking. this series combines some of her favourite topics (genetic manipulation, alien/human reproduction, what is humanity) into a tale of an alien species, the oankali, saving some human survivors from the apocalypse and beginning a gene-trading project with them, integrating them into their reproductive system and creating mixed/’construct’ generations with traits from both species. and like, to me, this was uncomfortably into the biology = destiny thing & didn’t really question the oankali assertion that humans were genetically doomed to hierarchical behaviour & aggression (& also weirdly straight for a book about an alien species with 3 genders that engages in 5-partner-reproduction with humans), so that angle fell flat for me for the most part, altho i suppose i do agree that embracing change, even change that comes at a cost, is better than clinging to an unsustainable (& potentially destructive) purity. where i think the series is most interesting is in its exploration of consent and in how far consent is possible in extremely one-sided power dynamics (curiously, while the oankali condemn and seem to lack the human drive for hierarchy, they find it very easy to abuse their position of power & violate boundaries & never question the morality of this. in this, the first book, focusing on a human survivor first encountering the oankali and learning of their project, is the most interesting, as lilith as a human most explicitly struggles with her position - would her consent be meaningful? can she even consent when there is a kind of biochemical dependence between humans and their alien mates? the other two books, told from the perspectives of lilith’s constructed/mixed children, continue discussing themes of consent, autonomy and power dynamics, but i found them less interesting the further they moved from human perspectives. on the whole: 2.5/5

love & other thought experiments, sophie ward man, we love a pierre menard reference. anyway. this is a novel in stories, each based (loosely) on a thought experiment, about (loosely) a lesbian couple and their son arthur, illness and grief, parenthood, love, consciousness and perception, alternative universes, and having an ant in your brain. it is thoroughly delightful & clever, but goes for warmth and humanity (or ant-ity) over intellectual games (surprising given that it is all about thought experiments - but while they are a nice structuring device i don’t think they add all that much). i haven’t entirely worked out my feelings about the ending and it’s hard to discuss anyway given the twists and turns this takes, but it's a whole lot of fun. 4/5

a general theory of oblivion, josé eduardo agualusa (tr. from portuguese by daniel hahn) interesting little novel(la) set in angola during and after the struggle for independence, in which a portuguese woman, ludo, with extreme agoraphobia walls herself into her apartment to avoid the violence and chaos (but also just... bc she has agoraphobia) with a involving a bunch of much more active characters and how they are connected to her to various degrees. i didn’t like the sideplot quite as much as ludo’s isolation in her walled-in flat with her dog, catching pigeons on the balcony and writing on the walls. 3/5

cassandra at the wedding, dorothy baker phd student cassandra returns home attend (sabotage) her twin sister judith’s wedding to a young doctor whose name she refuses to remember, believing that her sister secretly wants out. cass is a mess, and as a shift to judith’s perspective reveals, definitely wrong about what judith wants and maybe a little delusional, but also a ridiculously compelling narrator, the brilliant but troubled contrast to judith’s safer conventionality. on the whole, cassandra’s narrative voice is the strongest feature of a book i otherwise found a bit slow & a bit heavy on the quirky family. fav line is when cass, post-character-development, plans to “take a quick look at [her] dumb thesis and see if it might lead to something less smooth and more revolting, or at least satisfying more than the requirements of the University”. 3/5

the office of historical corrections, danielle evans a very solid collection of realist short stories (+ the titular novella), mainly dealing with racism, (black) womanhood, relationships between women, and anticolonial/antiracist historiography. while i thought all the stories were well-done and none stood out as weak or an unnecessary inclusion, there also weren’t any that really stood out to me. 3/5

sonnenfinsternis, arthur koestler (english title: darkness at noon) (audio) you know what’s cool about this book? when i added it to my goodreads tbr in 2012, i would have had to read it in translation as the german original was lost during koestler’s escape from the nazis, but since then, the original has been rediscovered and republished. yet another proof that leaving books on your tbr for ages is a good thing actually. anyway. this is a story about the stalinist purges, told thru old bolshevik rubashov, who, after serving the Party loyally for years & doing his fair share of selling people out for the Party, is arrested for ~oppositional activities. in jail and during his interrogations, rubashov reflects on the course the Party has taken and his own part (and guilt) in that, and the way totalitarianism has eaten up and poisoned even the most commendable ideals the Party once held (and still holds?), the course of history and at what point the end no longer justifies the means. it’s brilliant, rubashov is brilliant and despicable, i’m very happy it was rediscovered. 5/5

heads of the colored people, nafissa thompson-spires another really solid short story collection, also focused on the experiences of black people in america (particularly the black upper-middle class), black womanhood and black relationships, altho with a somewhat more satirical tone than danielle evans’s collection. standouts for me were the story in letters between the mothers of the only black girls at a private school, a story about a family of fruitarians, and a story about a girl who fetishises her disabled boyfriend(s). 3.5/5

pedro páramo, juan rulfo (gernan transl. by dagmar ploetz) mexican classic about a rich and abusive landowner (the titular pedro paramo) and the ghost town he leaves behind - quite literally, as, when his son tries to find his father, the town is full of people, quite ready to talk shit about pedro, but they are all dead. it’s an interesting setting with occasionally vivid writing, but the skips in time and character were kind of confusing and i lost my place a lot. i’d be interested in reading rulfo’s other major work, el llano en llamas. 2.5/5

verse für zeitgenossen, mascha kaléko short collection of the poems kaléko, a jewish german poet, wrote while in exile in the united states in the 30-40s, as well as some poems written after the end of ww2. kaléko’s voice is witty, but at turns also melancholy or satirical. as expected i preferred the pieces that directly addressed the experience of exile (”sozusagen ein mailied” is one of my favourite exillyrik pieces). 3/5

the harpy, megan hunter yeah this was boooooooring. the cover is really cool & the premise sounded intriguing (women gets cheated on, makes deal with husband that she is allowed to hurt him three times in revenge, women is also obsessed with harpies: female revenge & female monsters is my jam) but it’s literally so dull & trying so hard to be deep. 1.5/5

the liar’s dictionary, eley williams this is such a delightful book, from the design (those marbled endpapers? yes) to the preface (all about what a dictionary is/could be), to the chapter headings (A-Z words, mostly relating to lies, dishonesty, etc in some way or another, containing at least one fictitious entry), to the dual plots (intern at new edition of a dictionary in contemporary england checking the incomplete old dictionary for mountweazels vs 1899 london with the guy putting the mountweazels in), to williams’s clear joy about words and playing with them. there were so many lines that made me think about how to translate them, which is always a fun exercise. 3.5/5

catherine the great & the small, olja knežević (tr. from montenegrin by ellen elias-bursać, paula gordon) coming-of-age-ish novel about katarina from montenegro, who grows up in  titograd/podgorica and belgrad in the 70s/80s, eventually moving to london as an adult. to be honest while there are some interesting aspects in how this portrays yugoslavia and conflicts between the different parts of yugoslavia, i mostly found this a pretty sloggy slog of misery without much to emotionally connect to, which is sad bc i was p excited for it :(. 2/5

the decameron project: 29 new stories from the pandemic, anthology a collection of short stories written during covid lockdown (and mostly about covid/lockdown in some way). they got a bunch of cool authors, including margaret atwood, edwidge danticat, rachel kushner ... it’s an interesting project and the stories are mostly pretty good, but there wasn’t one that really stood out to me as amazing. i also kinda wish more of the stories had diverged more from covid/lockdown thematically bc it got a lil repetitive tbh. 2/5

[wexregolden]

It’s afternoon now and I got a few hours of sleep which is great 👌🏼 And my brain is kinda working again so I can finally write a little more of what I’m thinking.

I was kinda afraid because, well, every s4 so far kind of fucked up but I have to admit that I really really enjoyed this one!

LUDOVICO FUCKING BESSEGATO IS BACK!!! And Besse really slapped this season!! I don’t know what to even say about the talent of that man - he’s back with his gorgeous shoots and cinematography and I respect that! 😌 Thanks to him for the changes he did during the season, that made the story so fitting into their world and country. The genius of season 1 and 2 is back and I love what he did with season 4!

Sana was stunning this season, wow! I really loved Bea’s acting and interpretation of Sana. She was so gentle, kind, loving and fierce and I loved her a lot this season! She is flawed, definitely, and she makes mistakes but that’s what made her seem so real. I love her bond with the girlsquad, that scene with them damaging the car and getting Sana into their middle again was so beautiful and made me cry. I especially loved the Sana x Eva dynamics. And don’t get me started on her family! Her mom is an angel <3

The way they portrayed religion seemed so beautiful but I’m not going deeper into this one and judging it as I’m not in the place to do so without being a muslim myself. Gonna stick to Elia’s saying and not talk about something I don’t know about. (Also, that Elia and Sana thing??😂)

Malik and Sana literally were the cutest and I love what Ludo did to their relationship a lot. That scene at the end with him and the kids being in the greenhouse? Sana standing outside and waving at him? Definitely the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Also the scene with them being at the pool, Sana wearing her burqini? Poetic cinema!

I know it’s Sana’s season and I love how this one actually was about her, that there was way less drama that wasn’t around her or took away her time to shine. Ludo managed to somehow connect nearly everything to her and I love his work here. But I still need to mention my boys Marti and Nico. I like how they didn’t only treat them in the background somewhere, kissing a little and that’s it but still their drama somehow made sense in Sana’s story. Still, Marti was a little bitch sometimes this season, who would have guessed I’d say that one day. Some of his actions felt a little out of character when you still have s2 Marti in the back of your head. But he’s a dumbass and emotional and confused teenager so I kind of get his actions even if I’m not the biggest fan of them but guess it might be real? But at least it all turned out good and the beach scene was the cutest 🌈

The Marti and Sana talk *chef kiss* 👌🏼😘 I loved the og bench scene when I watched it first but the more often I watched it the more it bothered me. Isak trying to tell Sana how to act regarding hate as he know it himself... even if racism & islamophobia and homophobia are totally different things. That’s why I appreciate so much what skamit did there and that Martini didn’t try to teach Sana anything or say they’re the same. He looked at it from different perspectives and established that racism and homophobia isn’t the same but that he can still kind of feel Sana’s struggle.

Filippo was the hero of the season and I love how everyone came to him and asked for help. He’s a darling. And hilarious. PRAISE FILIPPO. I love that they picked the found family trope up again 🤧

Gio, ahhh my boy! He’s such a lovely character and I loved him so much this season. And him telling Canegallo to get in line.... SLAY!!! Also Gioeva endgame!!! ❤️ Let’s not talk about that sex scene tho, I’m trying to forget it. But hey, at least they’ve showed safe sex 👌🏼

THE SOUNDTRACK!!!!! Where does Ludo find all those PERFECT songs for each situation??? WHERE? The soundtrack was once again perfect this season, I loved it so so so much! It’s perfect and I already have so many of the songs stuck in my head.

I just have to mention the hide and seek scene here which somehow became one of my favourites in the whole show, don’t ask. It was so beautiful and emotional! I started crying the moment Nico walked through the dark house on his own and the moment he entered the room with Marti in it, it was over for me! AND THE SONG CHOICE. I love their friends playing “matchmaker”, locking them in and forcing them to make up, love it. It was the perfect picture between it being sad, emotional but so funny and cute too. And the desperation and tension you could feel between Marti and Nico ufff.

Loved the different POV clips at the end, it was so well done! The Luca and Nico one probably were my favourites.

The hug that Luca gave Silvia 🥺🥺🥺

And Marti being like “Can we throw that fisherman into the water?”YES BOY. Always hard to see homophobia like that :(

Oh, but I also loved the Filippo one. Him taking a std test and Ele and him swearing to always use condoms? LOVE ME SOME GOOD SAFE SEX TALK! And I’ve missed their sibing-dynamic <3

The ending was a masterpiece! I love how the show started and ended with Gioeva and them reading texts from each other. And them getting together again YES ENDGAME ❤️ I was a sobbing mess when the shots at the beach started, it was just so so so beautiful! Them jumping into the water together, cinematographic masterpiece, Besse strikes again! I was a sobbing mess and probably understood way too little of the last clip but it was still so beautiful and such a bittersweet ending, I loved it but I’m sad at the same time ✨

Skam Italia always handled the character developments and their relationships and friendships so well, that’s what I love so much about the show. So I loved how they brought all of them together one last time and showed that they rock the whole relationship part! 💕

I’m still way too emotional about everything that happened in the last hours so I’m surprised I even managed to write all of that here and I’m sorry for every possible mistake I made. Still wanted to write down all my feelings somehow. I could still cry about it being over for now but I’m so glad it happened and I got to witness it. Especially after crying in the middle of the city after the news of the cancellation. That’s what makes getting s4 even more special and I’m so grateful. Skam Italia and all the characters mean the world to me and I’m so thankful for them and the story that made me realise it’s okay to be different, not straight, it’s okay to not feel well and lonely and that you’re allowed to express those feelings. And most of all it taught me one thing: Tu non sei solo. ❤️

Grazie mille Skam Italia 💛

[paxtoon]

Ref sheet for my persona

So uh hi wasn't expecting to post on here again,

but @stale_pringles posted his part on here and I thought I should as well, these are our sonas for an au called "2 Jews in a room bitching" where we basically share an apartment and it's chaotic as fuck

Rich's part Long ass description General Full Name: Sara Reason for name: yes Nickname: Saretta Cotoletta, Sarita, Princess, Kitten, Babes Reason for nickname: first 2 only for friends the rest is Ali 👉👈 Age: yes Sex: female Gender: girl Place of Birth: Italy Birthday: 19/06 Currently living in: southernItaly Species/Race: hooman Ethnicity: Italian Sexual Orientation: bi-curious, demi ace Social Status: lonely Relationship Status: dating <3 Appearance Body Build: plum Height: short, 1,48m , 4'9 ?? Weight: no Skin colour: white Hair style: short, irl long Hair colour: brown Eye colour: brown Distinguishing Features: I'm boring- heart ahoge Preferred Clothing: pink aesthetic shit, soft Accessories: idk- Health General health: shit, 2 hospital check ups a year Posture: bad Any physical illnesses?: technically? It's more of a problem/syndrome I guess idk it's in the name Any mental illnesses?: I'm not gonna self diagnose✨ Take drugs?: unicorns Smoke?: daddy Mental/Emotional State Mental age:?? Act before thinking/Think before acting?:actings to much before acting Emotion-wise, generally: a roller coaster Conversation Way of speaking: hype, high pitched Common conversation starter: Swears?: ew bitch why the fucking fuck would I do such a bitchy thing Made-up words?: uhhhhhhh Made-up language?: daddy Likes/Dislikes Likes: cuddles, soft aesthetics, good omens, Hamilton, falsettos, 90's movies, Italian stereotypes, my friend, soft behaviours, stuffed animals, friends, dresses, big ass glasses, dark humor, unapologetic humor, inappropriate humor, uhhhh, pink, cozy stuff, cute dates, being warm, feeling protected, making fun of my friends, you guys 👉👈, SALMON❤❤❤❤ Dislikes: pedos, loud noises, people that don't accept opinions, "i know it all" People, punishments, strong bdsm, bdsm in general like I respect you if you're into that but personally it makes me uncomfortable, power dynamics, inequality, Trump, Richard, fish, racism, claiming something without proof, crying, I really hate crying, Americans- JK I LOVE YOU ALL- Hobbies talking to a wall, drawing Habits Picking, scratching my shoulders, imagining the worst case scenario Strengths/Weaknesses Strengths: good at comforting, I'm nice 👉👈 Weakness: a whiny bitch Skills/Abilities Dr a w Education/Intelligence Education: great IQ: dumb EQ: dumb Secrets Yes Fears Everything- Being left alone Confrontation Claustrophobia Future Death Swinging chandeliers Sticking ur phone out the car Bees and swamps Dreams/Goals Live in England and marry my cutie Views/Opinions on... Government: fuck it Religion: atheist but I love hearing Bible/any religion's stories, they're super interesting!! Economy: not a clue Technology: it ruined everything Favourites Food: meat cannelloni, crudo all barese Colour: pink, yellow, light blue Animal: dog Number: 3 Holiday: my birthday Season: winter Time of day: early, really morning like 3 am Thing to watch: animatics or just soft music videos Movie: Mr poppers' penguins, into the spideverse, Aladdin Show: good omens, clone high Type of art: cartoony tradigital Genre of music: soft love songs Genre of literature: fan fiction, comedy Genre of shows: love- Genre of movies: funny History Short insomniac Personality Short insomniac, inappropriate, immature, wants freedom, hates punishments/consequences, anxious wreck,,, a Jew in a room bitching 😳 Relationships Family: @/sh3llysh00 , @/ryenne-is-bored , @/sahara-jj , @/buttercupfrog S/O: @/justanali, my beautiful knight 💘💘💘 Friends/Allies: the Mario squad :) Quotes "Friends by choice, daddy by case" "Anyways I have 3 penises" "You're making me feel like a bottom" "Daddy~" "NOT THE BIBLE KINK 😳" Trivia Very useless

[renegadehoneybee]

2, 4, 5, pick any you want to answer

Ooooh, thank you for the ask!! <3 <3 <3  2. What's a character that you dislike? Dislike for writing reasons? Alex, i get why they integrated her with the Jody plotline to set up Wayward Sisters, but honestly i would’ve preferred to spend that time developing Claire further (and honestly, i did not get anywhere near enough Claire & Jody, OR have Claire & Donna do a hunt???? Iconic. Can you imagine???)  Dislike because they’re terrible in-universe? I feel like the common answer here would be John. The neglect and child abuse is just difficult to see past, especially given the long-term effects his actions have on both of his sons (and the various people they then go on to interact with). I just. I don’t like John Winchester.  4. What spinoff would you have liked from the show? THE BANES TWINS. Twigs, Twine, and Tasha Banes would have been a phenomenal backdoor pilot AND i think there was a lot of opportunity there to have further exploration into magic as a concept. I also just really loved Max and Alicia, and i think there was so much opportunity to delve further into those characters and their relationship and dynamics, especially the plot that gets set up with Max having damned himself to bring Alicia back. 

Also potentially fantastic opportunity to have like, a different atmospheric vibe for the show. I may be misremembering but i think when they call Mary they mention being in Louisiana, and i like the idea of contrasting a sort of southern gothic backdrop with Max and Alicia as these very modern characters, both aesthetically and in terms of who they are. Being really cognizant of the role of race and sexual/gender identity in how they occupy space in (many predominantly white) small towns and suburban areas. The conflicts and insecurity that sometimes results from them traveling areas where they aren’t safe, not because of monsters but because of other humans. It’s a more explicitly dark take on the supernatural-americana-road trip vibe, because it’s very much outright suffused with this country’s terrible struggle with racism. In fact, there would definitely be opportunities to examine the history and legacies of concepts within the genre that have really racist connotations--the glorification of pre-civil war america, the legacy of segregation, even, i think in season 2 of the Max and Alicia Banes series that exists in my head, moving to other locations set in the midwest, west coast, and the north and exploring and contrasting how these issues are different and the same. I mean, racism certainly isn’t exclusive to the south, and in some ways i think it’s more insidious in places where people think prejudice is either gone, at least where they are, or that it’s not their/a problem. 

And i mean here’s the thing too right, Max is a witch, Alicia technically isn’t human. The big problematic element of hunting as a white paramilitary fantasy eradicating “the other” can be subverted if we (”we” lol this is all in my head, @kripke like i’m the showrunner now) correctly handle how their identities 1) impact their approach to hunting and b) we reconsider/reframe the power dynamics. Max and Alicia don’t hunt on the fringes of society, seeking out monsters that threaten traditional family values/structures, their hunting focuses on targeting monsters that abuse the power they hold over others. And more often than not, that kind of power is derived from institutions (everyone from the man that abuses his wife and kids to the pharma CEO insider-trading), which often not just permit, but actively facilitate the abuse of power in order to preserve it (and the existing order). I think what makes a monster is not being an “other” (it can’t be, if our protagonists are “others” but are not monsters), but rather having power and using that power to exploit weaker/less powerful individuals. The natural foil that Max and Alicia provide is to show people using their power to protect others, especially the vulnerable/institutionally disadvantaged.

At the same time, i think they’re both a lot of fun, and the show would definitely have some lighthearted elements to allow the characters to develop through positive experiences as well as through struggle. For Max, I’d say a long-term, slowburn love interest, and for Alicia i could see two directions, one could be a mentor-figure (as a means of exploring and later reconciling how Alicia felt disconnected from her mother, in some ways, because she doesn’t have magic) kinda cast in a similar mold as Rowena (who i love). Another potential option is a bestie, personally i think there should be more representations of positive female friendship in tv and movies, and i really think it could be interesting for Alicia to bond with another non-human character (maybe there’s dramatic tension between her and Max because he brought her back and she’s unsure what that means for her personhood to be contingent on his magic, and we have a character going through a parallel struggle with notions of personhood, free will, and control of one’s own life).  But, of course, they will never make this show.  Sorry, this one turned into a really long answer because once i started thinking about this i had to write out my thoughts.  5. Favourite character that appeared in only 1 episode? I mean. Hester. Iconic homophobic queen, she told Dean that the very touch of him corrupts, from the moment Castiel laid a hand on him in hell, he was lost. She was onscreen for like 70 seconds, dropped That Line, and then died. Seriously who the fuck wrote that dialogue???  Dealer’s choice: 26. Cutest scenes in the show? I already wrote you an entire essay no one wanted about the secret spinoff that lives in my head starring the Banes twins. So. I’ll try to keep this short(ish).  Tombstone, Dean and Cas in the car, with the hat, i made you watch it? Cas introducing himself as agent Val Kilmer. Just. Overall a scene that was so soft and dorky and sweet.  Any scene involving Cas and Jack together. I love their dynamic and sometimes i cannot believe they really gave the gay angel a baby.  Full disclosure, I am a Cas girl (gender neutral), but I love Dean. So much. Any scene where he’s interacting with kids (Dead in the Water, the scenes with Ben, the scene where he takes Jack fishing) honestly just feels so heartbreakingly sweet. Elder sister syndrome really is being baby crazy but also not having kids because you’re like, too unstable for them. 

Anyway thank you for the ask!! <3 

[simplysparrow14]

“Shadows Of The Dark Crystal” Book Review

So, I'm going to say this write out the bat: I gave this book ⭐⭐⭐

And I give it three stars, mostly because it wasn't a bad book by any means, but I found myself really disappointed with this book on a number of issues. I felt that this book had really great potential, but it merely stays in the lane of “It's a first book in a series.” 

To sum up the entire book: 

“Shadows of the Dark Crystal”  takes place within the world of Thra, The home planet of the Dark Crystal. We see the gelfling empire thriving. Everything is peaceful, there are no wars to be fought, every clan is living their best lives, and they are prospering alongside their benevolent rules, the bird-like creatures known as The Skeksis.

 In “Shadows”, we follow a young gelfling tomboy by the name of Naia. Naia is the daughter of the clan Maudra, or leader, but she kind of resents her status of future maudra.  She once had dreams of being called upon to serve The Skeksis, these fair rulers who claim to be the Protectors of Thra, but her dreams were dashed aside when The Skeksis came to call upon her twin brother Gurjin instead. Because of this, she mostly spends her days training to be the next future maudra, to harness a healing fire that has been passed through the Drenchen bloodline for generations. 

One day, while patrolling through the swamp, Naia finds a visitor walking making their way toward her home.  Because of how thick and large the swamp is, Visitors are not common within the swamp, so she;s very on edge as too why this silver-hair, fair-skinned gelfling is trooping through the swamp like an idiot. Following the visitor, it turns out that the visitor, a Vapra gelfling by the name of Tavra, had arrived with a message from the ever-powerful All-Maudra, who sends a message that Gurjin has been branded a traitor to the Skeksis, and is now to be put to trial at the Castle of the Crystal. 

And then everything goes from there….

So from the get-go, I’ve always been hesitant about reading this book. It's mainly because of how deeply I would compare and contrast the TV Show vs The Books. 

I was very afraid that my high-expectations and Love for the show would taint my reading experience throughout the book, and thankfully,  for a majority of the book, it did not taint it. I found myself enjoying it.  but that doesn't mean that I don't find myself really disappointed with the execution of those ideas. 

As usual, I really found myself loving the world of Thra. The way the landscapes and locations are told is absolutely spectacular and i can see everything very clearly. The way J.M Lee encorperates “Clan Life” in the narrative is also wonderful--I absolutely love the snippets we get, like the drenchen putting their dirty food plates in small hanging baskets and leaving them out to get washed in the rain, or the Sprition having a small communal cooking fire and their relationship with the podlings is fantastic. 

The Skeksis were goofy and horrifying as always. and the climax of the book was very intense and action pact. The dialogue for the Skeksis, however, was very jarring at first, especially with the other Skeksis that wasn't the chamberlain. I'm so used to hearing that very lyrical, very quotable dialogue from the show. 

“All the better to hold on life, no matter the cast.” 

“All ready a solution lies within the Scientists very grasp.”

“We are the lords of the Crystal-- We have ruled for a thousand trine, and we shall rule for a thousand more--We are Eternal!

“I plant lies in the ground--Watch grow into Truth.”

“Two questions answer each other.”

“Gelfling have always been ruled--heads down, backs bent!”

The characters were quite pleasant--They did the job they were given. 

Naia and Kylans friendship was so soft and so pure. Just the way the two bonded and cared for each other really made their relationship all the more adorable. 

I loved the rivalry that Tavra and Naia sort of formed, it felt very pure to the conflict within the show, with them allking each other “Drenchen” and “Vapran” with such hatred and disdain. 

I also loved the amount of clan racism that was in this book. I loved the ways that the gelfling treated each other, with one of the most prominent encounters being with Naia and Maudra Mera. I love how J.M Lee wrote the dialogue for the scene--It was very passive aggressive in a way, with Mera basically telling Naia “Alright now, I'm giving you a meal and a place to sleep, but as soon as the sun rises over those mountains, you need to take your dreadlocks and swamp-smell and get out of my clan” 

But im afraid thats where my praise for this book ends, Now onto my complaints. 

So, the book is written in very short chapters, each with maybe 8-10 pages each. It makes for  avery quick read, but thats where one of my complaints with the book lies: There's not enough time within the chapter to fully flesh out the scenes. We do get confrontation on some scenes that come in later chapters, particularly the scene where Kylan explains to Naia that he himself experienced the same vision-residual echo as she had within the dark wood and their dreamfast,  but it wasn't enough for me. It felt as if the book was holding me back with the end of a fairly long pole. I really wanted to dive deep into scenes, explore these characters thoughts and feelings about whatever was happening, but the book wasn't allowing that unless it was directly needed. 

It absolutely felt like the Aughra and Brea scene within The Dream-Space where Brea was like, “Hey--What's wrong with the Crystal?! Why is it cracked?!”

And Aughra’s just like, “We don't have time for that! We’ll get there when we get there! No time for emotional scenes, we need to get this plot moving!”

Another thing that kind of ties up with my first point, is that while the Characters were good and they played their roles well, they’re relationships and dynamics were not fully fleshed out. Everyone felt confined to a role and no one felt fully able to push against those roles. 

One of the reasons why I love the protags in the TV show is that the writers gave them a chance to push against their roles: 

Rain is supposed to be a guard of the castle, this impressive force of strength and bravery, but in actuality he’s very much a coward and like what the chamberlain says, he runs the first chance he gets.  Throughout the season we see him learn from this fight-or-flight mentality, we see him lean to stand his ground and grow a pair in facing the skeksis. 

Deet is a happy little farm child who has a positive outlook on life, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't experience doubt and fear about her journey and her meaning to this big quest. We see her start to view the world differently, and in the end, we see her take a life, something she would have never had done in her lifetime (Granted she took the life of a diseased dodo-overlord, but given that deep is literally a sunshine child, she would have loved Skeklash, warts and all. )

Brea is a princess who loves to learn, she boasts about how she’s read certain books more then once and how she lives in complete luxury, but we also see her being a smartass. She’s manipulative and quick-witted and kind of conniving in the most endearing way. 

In “Shadows,” I never got any of that. I get that its a first book in a series and that as the books go on, the characters character-development will start to come into play, but I feel as though, at the end of book one, your characters should be at least a little bit different than at the beginning. 

In the end, Naia still felt like Naia. Yes, She discovered that the Skeksis were killing gelfling and yes her wings came in at the last second, but in the end, Naia still felt the same as she did in the first page. She had changed, yes, but not enough for me to be really be pumped to see where her character goes from end. 

Same with Kylan. He felt changed, but not enough for me to be excited for him. 

One last thing I need to say is that I wanted the background characters to be more fleshed out.Obviousl, again, I know we have more books in the series to go through to get some development, but i really wanted them to feel real enough for me that when they do come back in the later books, Im absolutly excited to see where they go.  I love Naia’s  family--I love Laesid. I love Bellanji. I love Naia’s little sisters. I love them all, but I wanted them to have more agency on the plot. I love how protective Bellanji and Laesid are of their Children, especially when this silver-haired stranger comes tromping through their swamp and just spits out, “Hey i'm sorry for bothering you during your lovely dinner but your only son is now a traitor to the skeksis and if he doesnt turn himself in we’re going to hunt him down like a nebrie.”

And both Laesid and Bellanji are like “eXuSe mE tHe FuCk?!”

But that also what bothers me is that they do all their negotiating and planning within this scene in Laesids room. There's never a time where Naia and Lakeside and Bellanji and her sisters are gathered AS A FULL FAMILY to discuss what the hell they are going to do about this situation. They’re only son, Gurjin, has just been branded a traitor to the crystal and If they dont bring him home and let him have an audience with the All-Maudra, they themselves are going to be branded traitors as well.  I feel as though with those prospects, the entire family would have taken a few moments to talk about it, instead of Laesid just going, “Okay Bellanji, take Naia with you when you go to the All-Maudra because plot demands her to go.” 

And that's where I think my biggest issue with the whole entire book lies. It fleshes out things, but not enough to where it really packs a punch. It never fully brings it home for me. When I read, I want to be invested. But with this book, I was invested, but not in the way that I wanted. 

Some miscellaneous things:

The Skeksis take Naia to a part of the Castle known as the All-Maudra’s guest Quarters. This suggests that the All-Maudra spent the night within the caslte, thus making it canon that the All-Maudra had seen a naked Skeksis walk the halls of the castle before. 

Tavra just causally popping her arm back into its socket like it was normal Tuesday for her. 

Bellanji flirting with Laesid while she tents to his wounds.

Laesin having (1) leg and being more badass for it

Gurjin being more interested in hunting in the swamp and wooing “Lassi-wings” up into trees for some fun times. 

That (1) podling definitely called playfully insulted Naia on her way to the village. 

Neech being best eel. 11/10 would fetch anything.