#no really i don't think i can continue with my life normally after i saw this

[lxlqzy]

I know I am terribly late but oh my god

don't try to ever talk to me again nuh uh

[wordsarelife]

heyyy, I just saw your appeal for theodore nott requests, but I also saw in one of your posts that you have a lot to do lately and I don't want to annoy you or something, take your time ♡

My idea for something with theo would be detention with Umbridge (I know it's cliche, but let's ignore this fact) and the reader (fem!reader would be great, but you can choose) has to write something that really insults her and hurts her pride like "I must not open my filthy mouth" or "Nobody wants to be bothered by me" (wow that sounds a bit depressing but let's ignore this too). And maybe theo is in Umbridge's little investigation team but changes when he sees the cuts on reader's hand (does this even make sense?). And maybe a little bit of angst which ends in fluff?

But please don't stress yourself ♡

—you are in love

pairing: theo nott x reader

summary: after a lovely visit with umbridge, theo must prove that the words carved into your skin are the opposite of the truth

warnings: mentions of blood and a wound, a little graphic

note: i initially didn't want this to get all like 'who did this to you?' but i just threw my principles out of the window in the middle of writing lol!! i hope this is something in the direction of what you wished for!! also: i'm living for enzo, just thirdwheeling and living his best life lmao

you knew you didn't like the woman the moment she had entered the halls of the castle. but now your hate was as evident as ever. she was sitting across from your, sipping on her tea, while reading the papers and you had a single task to fulfill.

you had much rather used the quill to cut out her eyes-

"go on, dear" she smiled and you had the sudden need to throw up "start writing"

"i don't think-"

"that wasn't a question!" you looked down at the paper, reading the sentence you were supposed to write ten times. it didn't even make sense to you what kind of punishment this should be. but what you read hurt you and maybe that was just the punishment she was so proud of.

you raised the quill, tapping it into the ink. the quill flew out of your hand after the first word. pain flodded through your body. "what?" you whispered to yourself, as you noticed the first word of the sentence carving into your skin slowly. the blood escaped the wound and dripped down your finger.

"continue" umbridge said and you did as you were told.

whatever she had done to you in that room, was the worst kind of torture, especially because you were doing it to yourself, with no escape. you read the sentence on your hand over and over again, scrunching your eyes closed in the hope that it would disappear, but it didn't.

atleast it was in the palm, which didn't make it any less hurtful, but atleast you could hide it better that way.

"there you are!" theo said the moment you entered the common room

"hi y/n!" enzo waved from one of the couches

"hey" you said tiredly, making a beeline to your dorm.

"woah" theo stepped into your way "no chess?"

"not tonight, theo" you tried to escape his eyes

"is something wrong?" theo asked concerned "did something happen?"

"i'm just tired okay? i want to sleep" you clenched your hand together, trying to upkeep the lie. but you had unintentionally clenched your wounded hand. you winced in pain and a drop of blood hit the floor.

it was like slowmotion as theo, enzo and you all looked down.

"what the fuck" enzo stood up "is that blood?"

theo reached for your hand, but you pulled it back, causing more blood to drip.

"fuck, y/n" theo said "show me your hand"

"yeah" enzo agreed "whatever that is can't be normal" he leaned in to whisper at theo, but did it loud enough for your to hear as well "girls don't normally do that right?"

theo turned his head at enzo, sending him a look with raised eyebrows and then slowly shook his head. enzo nodded, turning back to you "show him, y/n"

you sighed, understanding that you couldn't escape them even if you tried. theo gently took your offered hand, rolling the cloak up and opening your hand. he was met with nothing short of a sea of blood, which flodded your whole hand, making it impossible to see any skin underneath.

theo was staring at your hand. "get me a towel or something, quick" he instructed enzo, who just gulped and nodded, looking like he was going to throw up, but he hurried off right away.

theo guided you to sit down.

"what happened?" he asked, but you didn't answer "i asked you something"

"i fell over" you said. you knew that if you said it was umbridge, theo might never believe you. there was no use in fighting a teacher. especially not when theo was working for her and definitely not if this was your punishment after simply talking during class.

"the fuck you did" theo shook his head. before you could argue, enzo reentered the room, with a towel and a whole roll of toilet paper in hand.

theo wrapped the towel around your hand. it quickly soaked up the blood. he opened it back up, to softly pat some toilet paper on your wound. you winced in pain.

you watched theo closely and you knew what question he would repeat any moment now. he opened his mouth, but before anything could come out, he halted.

"are those words?" he asked calmly. too calm.

you tried to drag your hand away, embarrassed what exact words had been carved into your skin, but theo was quicker.

"hold her arm" he instructed enzo. enzo took your arm with one hand, while he clasped the other over both mouth and nose.

"what are you doing?" theo asked irritated.

"it smells so bad" enzo said disgusted, tears in his eyes, while looking anywhere but your hand "and i don't want to throw up on her, then she'd be full of blood and puke"

"very wise decision making" you nodded "can't you just put a plaster on that and call it a day?" you asked theo. he shook his head, taking a new piece of the toilet paper and soaking up the rest of the blood. the wound was mostly dried now. the blood had been moved all around your hand and arm, but it was all dry aswell.

theo took off the toilet paper and his eyes flew over the words on your palm.

enzo, incapable of reading it quietly announced the words loudly "i will never be loved" he turned his head to look at you, eyes big. you kept your eyes on theo, waiting for his reaction.

theo just kept staring at your hand and you were more anxious than ever before. "theo?" enzo asked "what are we gonna do about it?"

"what are you gonna do?" you repeated "nothing! obviously. none of you will do anything, you hear me?"

"fuck that" theo said, making both enzo and you look at him.

"what?" you asked.

"tell me the name"

"no" theo was still keeping a close eye on your hand, before he looked up at your answer suddenly.

"tell me the name, y/n" he repeated "enzo and i will deal with it."

"yeah" enzo agreed "we're on the inquisitorial squad. we can at least take points from them"

theo noticed how you looked at your hand at that. a very obvious tell you should've hidden better. but theo was usually too smart for you to trick anyway.

"oh" he said, understanding what had happened "umbridge did it, didn't she?"

"umbridge?" enzo repeated confused "what did she do?"

"sometimes, you're so slow" theo rolled his eyes at enzo "umbridge hurt out girl" he turned back to you "she did that to you"

your lack of an answer was enough for him. "take her to madam pomfrey, enzo" theo stood up.

"where are you going?" you asked.

"i have to take care of something"

you watched him leave the common room. enzo just shrugged. "come on"

madam pomfrey had quickly wrapped your wound in some bandages, but not before putting on a special treatment, that would help to heal it faster.

you were staring at the ceiling, bored to death, when there was a sudden sound. "theo" you said surprised. "where is your badge?" you asked, noticing it missing on his robe.

"i gave it back" he sat down on your bed.

"you did what?" you tried to sit up, but accidently put your weight on your hurt hand, wincing in pain.

theos eyes softened "i don't want to join some club that is fine with hurting the people i love"

"you didn't have to do that" your argued.

"yes i had" he insisted "simply because what she made you write isn't true. but i know that you questioned if it was. i won't let you think that"

"theo" you said softly.

"i spoke with potter and told him what happened. he has something going on as well. i know i can't do much, but he said he had a plan"

"you did all of that because of me?"

"are you kidding?" theo asked "of course i did. because i love you"

a tear slipped over your cheek. "thank you" you whispered "i love you too" theo softly kissed your forehead.

"i hope you get out of here soon"

"it will just be tonight"

"good" theo smiled "did enzo, the coward, really leave you here on your own?"

you shook your head, smiling, before you leaned over theo, dragging the curtain behind him to the side. there in the bed was laying enzo.

"he passed out, just after she took out the first syringe" you laughed "she gave him some sedatives and he's been out ever since"

theo shook his head, laughing, before he drew the curtain close again "at least then he can't see me do this" and with that, he kissed you.

[dannyboy-writes]

Running away

After fleeing the Fire Nation's land you found yourself in a small fishing village. Filled with flowers in spring and sunlight in the summer, with piles of leaves in autumn and a tad of snow in winter. Just a hint of whiteness. 

The last thing you would've expected from your travels was to end up here, having somewhat of a normal life, filled with joy. The only thing you would've changed was your last conversation with a certain someone. 

“You used to have long hair,” a familiar but distant voice said, as you turned around. 

"You used to be shorter," you said, face as serious as you could.

With a still straight face she said, "I could have you executed for that."

"Only if you can catch me," you finally broke a smile.

"True," Azula said, smiling as well. 

"What brings you to this lovely and remote area of the world," you asked, pulling some things off the table.

"I was searching for someone. They owe me a goodbye," she said playfully.

You put some water in a kettle, "I believe they said goodbye already."

"Did they?"

"I gave you a letter, it's more than I did to most," you defended. 

"You didn't give me a letter." 

"Well, I hid it in your room. You found it, you can't lie to me Azula," you laughed. 

She tried to maintain a serious face but dropped it soon as well, "I did find it." 

"I couldn't exactly leave it laying around, not with everything that was happening."

"I understand," she nodded. "I just wish you had given it to me." 

"I thought of it, but it was late. I had to ninja my way for it, I'm very proud of that," you said.

"Because of the guards?" 

"Yeah, that and the fact that everyone had my face in a reward poster…" 

She clasped her hands together and nodded. 

"Why are you still standing, Zula?" You said bringing a kettle of tea to the table and sitting down. "Get comfortable, do you want anything else?"

"No, it's fine," she said, shifting in her spot. 

"Is everything okay?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't it be," she asked in a paranoid tone.

"No reason," you said as she sat down. "Did you really come all this way just to get a goodbye?"

"Don't be silly, y/n. It's on the way in my travels," she lied. 

It had been too long since she last saw you, and the way your voice strained in your throat took her off balance. Perhaps this was how you'd always spoken, but she didn't think so. Maybe she had just grown too paranoid.

"Where are you going?" You asked. 

"Oh, let's not speak of that. How are you?" 

The question rocked you off your place, but you managed not to show it. 

"Well, I'm doing well. There's not much to do around here but fishing, so I do that, and sell that as well. I'm growing this tree in the back, it used to have a torn branch and it was falling off, but now it's looking good," you explained. "Sorry, you're probably bored by this." You said, knowing Azula wasn't one to be interested in the common occurrences of life.

"No, continue," she dismissed. And as you raised your eyebrow asked, "Please." 

"Well, there is also a small dragon-moose that comes around every now and then, searching for food. I tend to leave a pot of fresh water and some leftovers for him." You paused to sip on your tea, "Other than that it's all pretty calm. There's mostly old people here, so no one asks many questions. They usually tell stories to me, not the other way around, which is good." 

It was good, Azula thought. If you were still in hiding, even if you weren't in Fire Nation soil, it was good for people not to ask many questions. 

"How do you know it's the same dragon-moose?" She found herself asking, much to her own surprise.

You were taken a bit aback by the question but answered anyways. "Oh, he has a little white spot in between the eyes. Plus he always waits for me to sit down before he eats the food. I don't know why, really."

She smiled, again to her surprise. How simple your life was, and how content with it you sounded. All you did was fish, feed animals and listen to old people's stories, and yet you looked like the happiest person in the world. 

“It sounds wonderful,” she simply replied.

“Yeah… You sure you're fine?" You asked, concerned. It had been some time since you last saw her, but she didn't use to ask this many questions. 

“You have nothing to worry about, y/n. I promise," she nodded.

"Okay… Do you plan on staying?" 

"Would you like me to stay?" 

"I'm asking so I know how much food I should make, you don't have to stay."

"If you want me to stay I'll stay," she stated.

You blinked in surprise, not expecting that. "Uh, yeah, I would love that," you smiled. "That would be great." 

She nodded once again, this time with a smile plastered on her face. She thought about staying there, in your little house by the sea. 

Things would be so easy if she just had one more chance with you.

But she had Zuko and his friends on her heels, and it was better to leave you out of Fire Nation problems. One last dinner with you, that was all she needed.

When you woke up next morning with the house silent you knew she was gone, and when you walked into the kitchen and saw the note you hoped she was safe.

A little ‘thank you’ was all you had, and it was all you’d need.

[selfloverrrrrr]

A noncon biker megumi...

His friends with reader and secretly possessive over her...reader was still at school nyt time..and as she was about to leave it started raining and she had a dress on..she didn't have a umbrella with her and out of the blue she saw a familiar bike and saw gumi...he asked her if she needed a ride with a smirk and she laughed at his humor*i think💀anyways)it was raining heavily and she got soaked..her dress started printing her figure and gumi had to swallow a huge gulp....as she was about to climb the back side of the bike*at the end of the bike)he stopped her and told her to sit infront..without arguing she went to the front and he was behind...her ass was kinda at his deck and felt the head in his body rising..he held her waist tight and and started driving..as they came at a speedbumb..the bike went up and down and that's how her ass also jumped on his deck..he struggled to focus on the road..after some time they got to their hostel and she said her goodbyes..but gumi couldn't cuz he was really hard from all that bumping..and followed her as she was about to close the door he pushed it open and thts where the fun started

Rival

Warnings : smut , heavy smut, unprotected sex, Noncon, Kidnapping, physically and emotional abuse, biting, torture, size difference, Yandere, protective, jealous, obsessive, manipulative....

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Masterlist

Minors Do Not Interact

Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report

I was a second year student. My college life was going well. I mean what else you need for a good college life? My studies were going well, I have good friends. What else I need.

In college I have two special friends. Nobara and Yuji. They were like my bestfriends. I shared everything with them and they shared everything with me. I loved them so much. We were BFF. And I have some other friends too.

And then there was Megumi Fushiguro. And yeah.... he's the famous biker boy of our college. He's kinda my rival you can say. Sometimes He getting on my nerves. I don't know why he does that... maybe it just his time pass to bully me!

It was just a normal day at college. It was raining so heavily. I didn't brought umbrella with me. I was late for returning to the droom because of some work. Every students left. I was the one. I was standing in the front door of jujutsu high. Suddenly heard a voice "hey y/n... you need help?" The voice said. I looked at my side. It was Megumi. He stopped bike infront of me.

"seems like you need a ride....should I give you a ride?" he asked with a smirk. I laughed at his words. I knew exactly what he meant. it was raining heavily and also I got soaked. My dress started printing my body. But I didn't noticed he was starting at my body.... I was about to climb the back side of the bike but Megumi stopped me and told me to sit infront. Weird...but without arguing I went to the front and he was behind.

I sit infront of him. He started the bike. I didn't noticed that my ass was kinda rubbing on his dick. Megumi felt the heat in his body rising. He held my waist tightly and continued driving. As we came at a speedbumb..the bike went up and down and my ass rubbed on his dick. Now he was struggled to focus on the road. After some time we got to our hostel and I said goodbye to Megumi and went towards my room. But Megumi couldn't.... because he was really hard from all that bumping.

As I unlocked the door. Suddenly felt a push from behind and sound of locked the door. When I turned around it was Megumi. He was looking at me with a smirk. "What are you doing?!" I asked. "Come on y/n....are you gonna act all innocent and not gonna help me with what you did?" He asked with that smirk. "What are you saying?" I asked. "Oh... you still gonna act innocent I see" He said. "Megumi look... I really don't know what you're saying... just get out!" I said. "Oh you can't understand then let me show it to you " he replied with a smirk.

He grabbed my hair and dragged me towards his bedroom. I groaned in pain. He threw me on his bed and locked the door. Took off his shirt and threw it on the bed then started crawling towards me on the bed."Megumi what are you doing....please stop" I said and tried to push myself backwards but he grabbed my leg and pulled me towards him. I gasped. He was still smirking."stop?... Where's the fun then? The fun part is about to began ~.... Now you have to help me with the thing you've done with me..." he whispered and crashed his lips on mine.

I tried to push him away but his grip was too strong. I can't even move myself. He was kissing me too roughly. I couldn't breathe. He grabbed the hem of my dress and pulled it over my head which was already soaked with the rain water. My boobs bounced out. He looked at those with lust in his eyes and didn't waste any time, crashed his mouth on my breast licking, sucking and teasing the nipple and squeezing the other one with his hand. I moaned in the sensetion. I grabbed his hair and tried to stop him by pulling it but it didn't even effect on him. "M-Megumi stopppp" I scremed but he didn't stop.

Then he took off my pantie. He looked at my pussy. He rubbed his finger on my clit and whispered " so wet. You naughty little slut, getting wet for me huh?". Then he licked my pussy. I couldn't help but moan loudly. He smirked at my reaction and undo his pant.

His dick sprang out. It was too big and too thick. "Look... this is what you have done to me..." he said while stroking his dick. Fear grabbed me by my neck. " M-Megumi no no no... P-please no... s-stop" I begged but didn't even listen to me and slammed his whole dick inside me in one slide. I scremed. He didn't even give me time to adjust his size and started thursting in and out roughly. I was throughig my legs with pain and begging him to stop. And he was liking it so much. His thurst became harder and harder. I clenched around him tightly and he moaned loudly " ughhhhhh....ahhh s-so...ahhhh....so f-fucking tight " he started rubbing my clit with his thumb and I bite his shoulder scratched his back to control myself. With a few more thurst I came. He was still thursting roughly. I felt his cock pulsing inside me. I tried to push him away with all of my strength." Ughh...no no no no...ahhhhhh... I don't want this ..." I moaned. He grabbed my throat and chocked me down to the bed. " Shhh.... shut up and just fucking take what I'm giving you." He screamed. Within a minute he came inside me I could feel his seed inside me. He pulled out. My vision blurred out.

"So... you're gonna be my personal and only slut...huh?" He whispered with a smirk on his face.

Give me your requests guys....

I love when you give me your requests 💕

[that-weeb-in-ur-closet]

"Energized with all the glory."

F!reader x FAMOUS!Satoru Gojo

♡ Tags. Female reader x Satoru Gojo, rough sex, drinking, uses of the words "princess", "my pretty", "my dear", and "Pretty girl", swearing.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. THIS IS SMUT.

Satoru is beautiful, and that's an understatement. Short, fluffy white hair, smooth fair skin, long white eyelashes, long fingers, a slim yet muscular build, a silky voice, glossy lips, and of course, his hypnotic blue eyes.

So, it's no surprise that a modeling agency came to him one day, or that he became famous in three days, and of course, it's not a surprise you saw him in every magazine, every post you see on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, TikTok, you name it.

But, the supermodel saw you once, and was obsessed the very second it happened.

He just saw one of your random posts, and needed to know more about you.

So, he slid into your dm's.

...

And now, here we are, in his mansion, sipping red wine while you sit on his lap.

It was such a sultry and soft vibe, dim lights, him wearing a black tuxedo, and you wearing a beautiful red dress he bought you beforehand. And if you asked him why he did all this, he wouldn't tell you. Mainly because he himself doesn't know.

"Hm. I think you look really nice in that dress, my dear. It fits you perfectly, dontcha think?" He asks with his cheeky grin, booping you on your nose.

You nod in response, a soft smile on your lips as you look up at him. The wine is clearly expensive, maybe a bit too expensive for your liking. You're just a normal girl, living a normal life. You didn't expect this supermodel to invite you to his house, one of his many houses.

But, it all made sense after his endless compliments on how beautiful you are, and of course, it made even more sense when his hand started to wonder down your body, gently squeezing your nipples through the thin fabric.

"S-Satoru, H-he—" You get cut off by him pressing a gentle kiss to your lips, and you can feel his smirk from the way you try to hide your moan. His other hand starts to slip lower, rubbing against your thigh as you start to feel a poke against your ass.

"Hmm... It's okay, princess. Just relax for me, yeah?" He says with that charming smile, rolling up your dress to expose your panties that are soaking.

How can you say no? The supermodel let you in his house, gave you a fancy dress, fancy whine, and—he looks gorgeous. And, not very many people can experience this, so why not enjoy it?

And that's how you ended up in his bed, head pushed into the pillows, him ramming into you with the meanest thrusts you've ever had. You scream for him eyes rolling back while both your bodies continue to collide in a back-and-forth motion, him whispering "You're doing so good, my pretty— fuck- not many can take me this well~" he slurs out, leaning down to bite your shoulder.

"S-Satoru, p-please, be gentle— nghh- y-you-" You cut yourself off with a streaking moan when he goes faster, and you can feel his smirk when he talks.

"D-oh, why would I be gentle when I h-have the best pussy in the world r-right here?" He asks in a low and breathless way, voice high like he's about to moan or cum.

You don't answer, you can't answer. You just keep babbling his name, the feeling of him pushing in and out of you, hands rubbing circles into your hips, and his whines, it's all too much.

"Pretty g-girl, I-I fuck, I'm g-gonna c-c-" But he can't even finish his sentence when you clench around him. He cuts on the spot, strings of long and hot cum shooting into you. You follow suit, with him still grinding against you through both your orgasms, leaving you overstimulated and shaking, not to mention out of breath and about to pass out.

But, he quickly lets go of you and rolls you over, smiling as he pushes the hair out of your face. How does he look so pretty even after sex?

"You okay? Did I hurt you too much?" Yes. He hurt you a bit too much. But was it worth it? Oh, hell yeah.

You fucked a supermodel.

[dazed--xx]

💘When Hearts Collide💘

Member: Non-Idol! Hyunjin x Reader

Word count: 9.9k +fake texts

T/W: angst, mentions of puberty, stereotypes of male and female friendships, teasing (friendly), Underage drinking (PLEASE BE CAREFUL wont say don't do it in my culture its pretty accepted if its a sip or two), jealousy, mutual pining, suggestive behavior but no smut (Theyre minors...like ill imply or mention that they've had sex or not cause their age range is 16-17 years old which is over the age of consent if its with another minor in the same age range but as a 26 year old I wont be writing teenagers having sex just seems odd to me), mentions of suicide but like in a joking way, arguing, Jungkook is legit voice of reason character. anything else that could potentially be a trigger.

A/N: wow i actually like loved this story and I was such a bitch about it. man the "groups chats" gonna love this one.....lol but nah fr I really appreciate the requester for this. i legit wrote it every chance I got these past few days so I hope you enjoy it. Also I might do another one from Li-Rin’s perspective cause it might be really cool and good too do

Can men and women be just friends?

Y/N thought so, for many years, she held her best friend Hwang Hyunjin close to her heart. Seeing him as more of a chaotic twin brother than a romantic partner. They had met at the tender age of 5 years old in kindergarten. She could remember it like it was yesterday when he extended the half-eaten candy bar to her as she wailed about not having a snack. His bright doe-eyed smile as he helped her wipe her tears. The soft pat on her back as she nibbled on the candy. She hadn't realized how this small interaction would develop into the most important friendship of her life.

Y/N will admit, unlike the other girls, she hadn't noticed Hyunjin was a guy until her second year of high school. While plenty of girls in middle school would fawn over him, she never really saw the appeal they had when it came to her best friend. This was the boy she saw cry for hours when his favorite anime was cancelled and he screamed like a final girl when he was tossed into her pool by her older brother. He was the kid she spent her summer nights in a tent collecting fireflies and telling ghost stories with. She saw him throw up on Choi Soojin when they kissed at a birthday party in 6th grade, and cry like a girl when Kim Mina broke up with him to date his friend in 7th.

How could she ever see him as a man?

She would have sworn that she never could if he didn't disappear the summer between the first and second year of highschool. Dance camp was what he had told her when he finally could answer her calls. His voice was deeper than it normally was and Y/N shrugged it off, not bothering to think much of the explanation until she saw him. That's when she realized it wasn't only his voice that could change when he hit puberty. Though she had developed before she started high school, she forgot the changes that came with puberty. No longer did her best friend have a chubby-cheeked baby face, his features were much more defined. Y/N wasn't sure how to handle the way her heart raced when he smiled at her. The way he ruffled her hair before wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into a tight hug.

Y/N felt her cheeks heat up as her breath hitched in her throat. She hugged him back after a moment, before quickly trying to pull away from him. Her eyes avoided his as she continued to rack her brain for some kind of explanation as to why she had felt that way toward her best friend. While she had, had a boyfriend before, he never made her heart flutter like that. She was surprised when she felt Hyunjin's grasp on her waist tighten as he inhaled burying his face in her neck. "Where are you going? I missed you a lot, let me hold you for a second" He whined. She knew her face was a bright scarlet at his words. How could it not be? Her heart was pounding against her chest. "I-I missed you too but I don't want to be late..." She stammered shyly as she went to pull away from him again, this time turning away from him and he kept his arms wrapped around her waist letting his chin rest on her shoulder.

A pout sits on his lips as he stares at her "When did class become more important than me?"

"Will you be able to make my mother not be on my ass about college?" Y/N questioned as she raised her eyebrows as she tried to pry his arms from around her waist. "Stop treating me like a creep let me hug you I haven't been able to annoy you for almost three months" He groans. Y/N shakes her head as she palms herself at his words.

"You are a creep if you hold on to a girl without her consent"

"You're a girl?" Hyunjin asks in disbelief his hands resting on her waist as his eyes travel from her face down her neck, his teeth involuntarily taking his bottom lip as his eyes linger on her chest and hips for a moment. Y/N rolls her eyes at his words not noticing his wandering eye. "I can remind you if you'd like..." She teases playfully. Hyunjin's eyebrow raises in amusement for a moment before he shakes his head to himself before letting her go.

"How's that?" He whispered in her ear. He pressed his chest against her back, and Y/N turned her head to face him. She bats her eyes at him flirtatiously. "Wouldn't you like to know?" She teased as she scrunched her nose at him and walked toward the entrance to the school. Their sophomore year continued with flirty touches and whispers filled with unofficial infatuation. But they were still just friends and nothing more in Y/N's eyes. Nothing too different than normal teasing between best friends, they didn't really mean anything by it.

Right?

The summer proved to be confusing.

While she spent her days either with Hyunjin or at her part-time job, she found her eye wandering in her best friend's direction more and more. She found herself more excited to be at work than hanging out with Hyunjin the more summer went on. The close proximity she and Hyunjin typically kept when they hung out seemed to become overwhelming for her for some reason. Her friend, Li-Rin, swore she was developing a crush on him. Y/N could remember vividly how adamantly she denied the claim.

How could she have a crush on Hyunjin? It's Hyunjin...She never thought she would see him that way, and how could she? They've always been closer to siblings, so much so that their birthdays were separated by only a day. She never once thought that she would feel her heart flutter when he smiled at her. Nor had she expected her cheeks to turn a bright crimson every time he leaned in close to watch a video on her phone or when their finger brushed as she handed him something. She hated it honestly, how could she be one of those girls. She needed time away and felt picking up more hours at work would help her clear her mind and figure out how she felt about him. Spending that time away was helpful but she couldn't avoid him when she got out of work. He was practically part of the family, due to his living at the sharehouse her parents rented out to her and her friends. Her parents adored him and always invited him to holidays.

Y/N thought the party Li-Rin invited her to would finally be her escape. A way for her to get away from Hyunjin and her confusing feelings for him and clear her mind. Maybe even meet a cute boy in the process. But the moment she saw that familiar onyx mop of hair and lanky build with a petite brunette on his arm, she felt her comfort completely extinguish.

How could he be everywhere? she wondered as she made a beeline for the kitchen to indulge. The cluster of colorful glass bottles that sat beside the sodas drew her attention as she reached for a clear bottle with a red seal around the top. "Vodka....You sure that's a good idea?" An unfamiliar male voice questions from behind her. She groans in frustration as she turns to the person "Is that really your--" Her words are trapped in her throat as her eyes meet his. He's almost like a work of art and you weren't talking about the tattoos that littered his right arm.

He chuckles with a smirk as he raises his eyebrow in amusement. "Wow...You're actually speechless. I've never had this happen to me before" He comments. She shakes her head pulling herself out of her trance as she grabs a red solo cup, "I-I was caught off guard..." Y/N murmured twisting the cap off the clear bottle. The guy stares at her worriedly as she pours a large amount of vodka into the cup filling it almost halfway showing her inexperience. "Woah.. that's probably not a good idea" He warns as he tries to grab the cup from her.

Y/N's movements are faster than his as she quickly tries to drink the whole thing but the moment the stinging liquid hits her throat she feels herself gag. "Yup. That was probably a bad idea...." The stranger nods as she coughs at the burning sensation in her throat. She felt the stranger pat her back, comfortingly as she coughed up her lung. "I'm Jungkook by the way" He states sarcastically "You know? Since I have to take care of you now" his lips curl into a flirty smirk. Y/N groaned at his words "Nah, I'll be okay.." His eyes widen for a moment as she goes to walk away from him and embarrassment fills her gut. The lack of experience with alcohol made her body tingle with warmth, the room felt wavy. "W-wait!" Jungkook calls as he grasps her wrist. She stares at his hand as if it was a foreign object and he pulls his hand away.

"Sorry, but you just took a lot of alcohol to the head...you should probably sit down." He states as he lifts his hands in surrender. You stare at him with nervous curiosity. "No funny business and I'll just help you to the couch." He states calmly.

"Why?" She questioned nervously.

"You looked like you didn't know what you were doing when you were trying to get something to drink. I mean you clearly didn't even know that even for a heavyweight that was way too much to drink all at once.." He confesses.

"So what? You're some knight in shining armor or something?"

He chuckles at your words. "Nothing like that. Just want to make sure a pretty girl doesn't get taken advantage of or hurt herself because she didn't have someone to help her learn how to drink" Y/N smiles kindly at him as she accepts his offer.

Maybe she could get over Hyunjin...

It had been a little over an hour and Jungkook being the nice guy he was, he didn’t leave Y/N’s side.

The room no longer spun as she and Jungkook talked about everything and nothing at all. Y/N regretted not being a couple of years older, losing any chance to get with him when she told him her age, and as much as she wanted to forget about him; Hyunjin and his little friend wouldn't leave her mind. What were they doing? She wondered. Who was she? His new girlfriend?

Jungkook playfully taps the rim of his cup on her forehead. "You still in there?" He questions with a chuckle. Y/N smiled as she rolled her eyes at him. "I'm sober now, you know?" She replied brushing over her spacing out. Jungkook raises his eyebrow in amusement "Really? Wanna take a couple tests to prove it?" Jungkook questions with a smirk as he rests his arm across the back of the couch adjusting himself to face her. His free hand reaches out for her chin taking it between his forefinger and thumb as he examines her features. Y/N gives him a look saying 'Are you serious?'

Jungkook nods at her, smiles, and brings his hand down as he notices her relaxed state. "Not completely sober but tipsy, so that's better than before," he says calmly. Y/N was about to say something when someone sat between her and Jungkook. Y/N's eyes widen as she recognizes her best friend, who sloppily leans on her shoulder.

"Baby..." Hyunjin whined as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Y/N sighs as she's greeted by the strong scent of liquor. "Hey, Jinnie..." she coos soothingly. Hyunjin's face lights up as she rubs his back. She gives Jungkook an apologetic look and he gives her a reassuring smile as he lifts his beer toward her before taking a sip. Y/N giggles at his gesture and Hyunjin looks between the pair. His eyes burned holes into Y/N's cheek. "Who's he?" Hyunjin slurs before leaning into Jungkook's face "Who are you?" he questions, a hint of bitterness in his tone. Y/N grabs Hyunjin's sleeve tugging him out of Jungkook's face.

"Sorry, Jungkook oppa...This drunkard is my best friend" Y/N apologizes as she gives Hyunjin a warning look, who stares back at her with a look of disgust as he feels jealousy filling his stomach. "Oppa? Since when have you known each other?" He questions, his tone laced with annoyance. Jungkook answered him this time, "Met Y/N earlier tonight, She was....experimenting and it backfired" He chuckles.

"Was I talking to you?" Hyunjin questions as he gives Jungkook an annoyed look. Jungkook's eyebrows raise in amusement "You're talking about me and in my vicinity, Best Friend Hyunjin" Jungkook's tone is playful and sarcastic as he begins to find amusement in Hyunjin's reactions seeing how red his face turns. Hyunjin scowls at Jungkook as he goes to stand up before Y/N grabs the sleeve of his hoodie.

"Sit." She grits. Hyunjin gives her a look of disbelief, his mouth hanging open partially. "But bab--" Y/N holds her hand up, cutting off his words. "No, apologize...he's our sunbae and he helped me out a lot tonight" Y/N explains. "You're drunk, Jinnie..." She gives him a look of concern as she caresses his cheek lovingly. Hyunjin leans into her touch for a moment before nodding, with a guilty pout. He turns to Jungkook, bowing politely "I'm sorry, I-I've been drinking and I was rude..." He mutters reluctantly. Jungkook gives him a reassuring smile "Don't worry about it, I've done way worse"

"You want me to bring you home, Jinnie?" Y/N asks worriedly as Hyunjin reaches for her hand, taking it into his as he leans on her shoulder and begins to play with her fingers, trying to stop the room from spinning. So cute...Y/N thinks as he pouts as he tries to snuggle into her. "Come on, Let me bring you home." She coos as she stands up. Jungkook helps lift Hyunjin off the couch and escorts him outside. "Y/N, you aren't driving right?" Jungkook questions worriedly. She shakes her head, "No, thank god our share-house is only a 5-minute walk so I didn't drive." She states as the crisp autumn air kisses her skin. Jungkook sighs in relief "You need me to help get him there?"

"No, trust me I'll be fine"

Jungkook doesn't protest as he leans Hyunjin back against her and she lifts his arm over her shoulder. Hyunjin immediately wraps one of his arms around her waist pressing his chest against her back, his other arm wraps around her shoulders and he nuzzles his nose against her temple. "Hmmmnnn..." He sighs "So pretty...."

"Thanks, Jinnie but lets get home, 'kay?"

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Hyunjin questions as he continues to cling to her; making their walk a lot harder than it needed to be. Y/N shakes her head "I don't have to report to you, but I also didn't even know I was coming until I just did" She shrugs.

"I would have come with you. we could've had f-fun together though baby...I wouldn't--i wouldn't feel so worried...right now" He slurs as he tightens his grip on her waist. Y/N raises her eyebrow "Worried? Why?" Hyunjin just shakes his head "You don't get it... you won't understand..." He whines his voice cracking as he rests his head against the back of hers.

"When don't i understand you?"

"Always! you always ignore everything I'm trying to do and think I do things for stupid reasons like because I'm your best friend!" Hyunjin shouts. Y/N feels surprised at his declaration as she tries to hold onto his arm. "What are you talking about?" She questions as she feels him rest his chin on the top of her head. "hey! I'm not your crutch stop, you're heavy" Hyunjin ignores her as he stops their movements hugging her tight.

"Why did you have to be with that guy? Why not me?"

"Jinnie, what are you talking about?"

"That guy! Why were you with him? How long have you known him? Is he your boyfriend now? He's not, right?" Hyunjin slurs his voice full of worry as his grasp on her tightens. Y/N shakes her head "No? I just met him, I drank too much and he helped me sober up. Besides Jungkook oppa isn't interested in a minor, he's 5 years older than us" She retorts. Hyunjin lets out a sigh of relief as he loosens his grip on her and leans in kissing her temple. "Good...you should be mine. Not anyone else's" He mumbles into the kiss.

"God, how much did you have to drink?" Y/N questions. "Not a lot in the beginning..." Hyunjin slurs and Y/N raises her eyebrow, turning her head so she can face him. Her cheeks heat up as the corners of their lips touch and she pulls away slightly.

"And after the beginning?" She asks her voice laced with concern.

Hyunjin hangs his head "I was gonna pace myself, I know I should b-but--why were you with him?" He asks again cutting off his own explanation due to his intoxication. Y/N felt unease settle in her stomach and a subtle sense of guilt. "I just told your drunk ass that I drank too much earlier...Thank god I'm sober enough for this right now" Y/N groans as she tries to get Hyunjin to continue walking but he stands his ground and holds her in place. "Why were you all over him then?" He questions, pain and jealousy laced in his tone.

"I was drunk...you're all over me right?"

"I could be..."

"You are...." Y/N rolls her eyes at his ignorance. "No...not the way I wanna be...can I show you?" He whispers as he presses himself against her. Y/N goes to turn to look at him to scold him, his hand moves from her waist to her cheek as he leans in and presses his soft lips against hers. Y/N's eyes widen as she freezes, Hyunjin's eyes flutter closed as he groans against her lips. She hesitantly responds to his kiss, letting her lips move against his for a moment. She felt her heart swell as he kissed her deeper his tongue brushing over the entrance to her mouth. Y/N goes to pull away, her sobriety making everything seem way too overwhelming.

"No.." Hyunjin whines as his lips chase hers and he turns her around so she is facing him. "Taste so good...don't make me stop" He slurs. His drunken state is more obvious and Y/N can pry herself away from him. "You have to. I need to get you home and you're being a pain" Y/N pouts as she takes his hands in hers comfortingly. Trying to brush over his previous actions, her heart raced a mile a minute as he furrowed his eyebrows. His angelic features looked completely flushed and she felt her guilt grow stronger.

"Kiss me..." Hyunjin whines as he takes his hands from hers and holds her face as he leans in, brushing his lips over hers. Y/N leans back and hurt flashes across Hyunjin's face. "You're drunk..." Y/N reasons as she grabs his wrist finally able to get him to start walking back to the sharehouse. "So?" He questions with a pout.

"I'm not kissing you when you're drunk..."

"I'm not a girl..."

"Being a guy doesn't make it consensual, especially not when you're this drunk. you still don't have a solid mind to consent to anything so don't make me a pervert."

"You just did..." He murmurs as he trudges behind you. Y/N sighs in frustration at his brattiness. "You kissed me, which I will be overlooking because you're what?...say it with me here, Drunk" Y/N jokes but it sends a painful shock straight to Hyunjin's heart.

"So if I kissed you sober? Will you stop me then?"

Y/N freezes for a moment. Her face heated up. "You won't..."

"I want to..." Hyunjin confesses as he reaches out to caress her hip. “If I try to, will you let me?" Y/N raises her eyebrow in amusement. "You'll have to try and see..." she replies, trying to sound nonchalant but flirty. Hyunjin leans over her shoulder, his lips brushing against the shell of her ear.

"You think I won't?"

"You've never shown interest in doing it before," Y/N giggles, trying to lighten the mood as she grows nervous. Hyunjin scoffs, "That's a lie. We kissed at Nam Hyunjoo's party." A look of frustration sits on Hyunjin's features as Y/N shakes her head.

"That was 4 years ago, Jinnie, and a dare" She retorts as she sighs in relief as they finally walk through the gate of the share house. Hyunjin trudges behind her "It doesn't matter it happened..."

"Yeah, Yeah. go to bed" Y/N waves him off as they enter the house. Walking toward the couch she sits down allowing her muscles to finally relax; her head rests against the headrest. Hyunjin places both of his hands on the back of the couch as he leans over her "Stop doing that, Let me kiss you now" He whines as he leans in closer and Y/N leans forward for a moment brushing her lips over his teasingly before shoving him back by his shoulders and gets off the couch opting to escape to the sanctity of her bedroom.

"Sober up first" She states with a wink as she disappears up the stairs.

Y/N thanked GOD that Jungkook helped her out the night before, completely avoiding a hangover and being able to make it for her shift today. The fast-paced environment of the diner on a Saturday morning, the hectic and ridiculous amount of tickets, and not enough coffee to go around. But even in the chaos, Y/N finds herself grateful to find her mind occupied with something other than Hyunjin like it had been for the past 12 hours. She didn't sleep a wink, her heart in her stomach from the moment she went upstairs.

The ghost of his lips lingered on hers. She had a hard time remaining in her room and not taking care of her best friend, but his persistence in her kissing him made her feel butterflies rise in her stomach. She had a hard time accepting how much she enjoyed it, it was Hyunjin; He was her best friend. They'd kissed before, how could it feel so different when he kissed her this time? How could everything be such a mess? She had drifted off into a restless slumber in and out throughout the night until she had to get up for work at 4:30 am.

From the moment she opened the doors, she no longer had time to think about anything but breakfast items and coffee orders. As it began to slow down, she heard the familiar chime from the bell. She greets the customer as she wipes down the counter. "Take a seat anywhere.." She instructs them kindly as she turns around and is greeted with a familiar face. Jungkook stands there with an amused smile and another guy next to him pats his shoulder as he walks toward the bar. Y/N sighs as Jungkook presses the bell, she notices him leaning over on his elbow and he waves playfully giving her a teasing look.

Grabbing a coffee pot she walks over to the pair, a service smile on her lips as she stands in front of them. "How can I help you today?" She asks, professionalism laced in her tone. Jungkook smirks and raises his eyebrow "Half a cup of vodka" He teases. Licking her lips, Y/N looks around for her boss. "Go fuck yourself" she retorts when she doesn't see him nearby.

Jungkook places his hand over his chest as he scoffs in faux offense "And here I came to check on you and everything..."

"No, you didn't. you literally said you were gonna harass me at my job last night"

"Damn, thought you'd be too drunk to remember" Jungkook chuckles as his friend scrolls on his phone completely uninterested in the conversation. "Speaking of being too drunk to remember, You have a hard time with your friend?" Jungkook asks as he flips the mug in front of his friend and himself over and gestures for her to give them coffee. Y/N complies filling both of the mugs as she shakes her head trying to avoid talking about Hyunjin too much. "Nah, it's not the first time he's been blacked out. Kinda always his caretaker" She shrugs. "Are you gonna eat too?" She asks as she pulls her pad out of her apron, clicking the pen. Jungkook raises his eyebrow "Is it free?"

"Broke College student meet broke highschooler" Y/N snorts as she waves her hand in front of her, gesturing toward herself. Jungkook rolls his eyes before scanning over the menu placed in front of him.

"Can i get a bacon egg and cheese bagel?" Jungkooks friend asks and Jungkook nods along with him. Y/N writes their order and goes to enter it in the POS. She feels a tap on her shoulder and turns to see her manager standing there. "Sir?" She questions puzzled.

"Go on your 30 after you put it in, Hera's gonna cover you" He states calmly before turning away from her. Not needing any more instruction you quickly finish entering Jungkook's order and clock out for your break. Walking toward the break room, she stops in front of the lockers grabs her phone, and walks out the back door to get fresh air. Turning her phone on it comes to life with messages from Hyunjin.

Y/N felt her cheeks turn a bright scarlet as she read the pet name. How could such a simple request make her heart race so much? How could she be feeling so excited to go home now? The memory of their kiss lingers in her mind. Brushing her fingers over her lips for a moment before she realizes her behavior. Her eyes widen as she quickly brings her hand away from her lips.

Oh Fuck....She likes Hyunjin.....

Y/N didn't know how to handle her epiphany.

The more she spent with him, the more her feelings seemed to blossom. She felt her eyes searching for him and her heart racing faster when he called her name. Even when the school year started she figured her heart would finally settle now that they were in separate classes and they would only see each other in passing due to her cram school. But she should have realized how persistent her best friend could be, he and Li-Rin rarely got along besides a few tipsy interactions and taking care of the other hungover self until Y/N was available to take over. To say she was surprised to see the pair now getting along swimmingly would be an understatement.

Due to Li-Rin's budding friendship with him, Hyunjin no longer breaks away during lunch and would come with Li-Rin to hang out with them. Every once in a while, he and his friends would disappear for who knew what and Y/N would finally gain the ability to breathe again. She sometimes dreaded these days when Hyunjin needed to be extra clingy before going to his class in the morning. How should she keep trying to play things off how she normally would? For years she would have brushed off his flirty remarks and clingy actions but now she found herself reciprocating. She knew how dangerous this could be, how crossing the line with him beyond a drunken kiss and flirty words could ruin everything they'd built over the years. But as the weeks continued to go by she found herself not caring as much as she once had.

She finds herself feeling more and more eager at the idea of giving in to her emotions and just confessing to Hyunjin. What could be the harm? He was her best friend for a reason. They understood each other on a level no one else could reach. "Y/N, Li-Rin" Hari calls the pair over as they look around the cafeteria. Y/N smiled feeling a sense of relief as she didn't see Hyunjin and his group of friends seated at the table. Walking over to where Hari was seated, Y/N smiled at the 3 other girls who gave her a friendly wave. "Y/N, Hyunjin finally let you off the leash?" Sol-i teases as Y/N sits beside her. Rolling her eyes Y/N chuckles softly "So I'm a dog now?" She raises her eyebrow. Hari giggles as she joins in on the teasing "I mean with the way you two cling to each other you'd think they're married" The girls laugh at the joke.

Y/N feigns disgust "You realize he's just my best friend right?"

"Is that why you guys made out at the party Friday?" Hari questions with her eyebrow raised and Y/N feels her heart drop into her stomach.

"What? What are you talking about?"

Hari rolls her eyes as she leans in closer "I saw you guys, completely sucking face right down the street from Felix's place" She giggles and Y/N's eyes widen as she begins to stammer in a panic "W-what? N-No. No, it wasn't--we weren't sucking face it was just a kiss." The girls gasped "So, it's true?" Li-Rin questions, an unfamiliar look on her expression. Y/N looks at her for a moment "Hyunjin was blackout and feeling clingy so he kissed me. But it was just a stupid kiss, that Hyunjin probably doesn't even remember so it doesn't matter." She argues trying to change the subject. "You guys should totally go out, you guys would be cute" Aera comments cheekily. Y/N groaned in response as she hid her face in her hands.

"Can I just die right now?"

"Why? Because you LOOOVVEE him?" Sol-i teases.

"No, because you guys are embarrassing" Y/N states as she softly throws a fry at her. "Don't get mad at me because you like him"

"N-No, I don't" Y/N lies, trying to keep her feelings private while she tries to work them out. However, She feels a real relationship could possibly work out with Hyunjin. She wouldn't want to ruin any chance she had by involving her caring and loving but nosy friends in the mix. Y/N felt herself grow anxious as Ji-Rin's face lights up at her refusal. "You don't?" Ji-Rin asks her eagerness for the same answer evident and Y/N complies. "N-Not like that. H-He was drunk so..."

"Good." Ji-Rin sighs placing her hand over her chest as if she's relieved. "So, what's everyone gonna do tonight wanna study at my place." She asks trying to change the subject, Hari's eyebrow raises and the other four's eyes meet each other as they feel an awkward tension settle over the group.

Before Hari speaks up "Nah, put that shit in reverse and park it. The fuck do you mean good?" She challenges. Ji-Rin gives her a puzzled look "What do you mean?" she questions with a confused pout her head tilting to the left side slightly.

"What I just said. What do you mean good? Do you like Hyunjin or something?" Hari asks with shock and a defensive tone. Ji-Rin smiles giddily as she covers her face with her hands. "Maybe~" Ji-Rin replies "Kinda..." Hari scoffs and crosses her arms over her chest as she goes to say something to her, Y/N kicks Hari under the table as she notices Hyunjin and his friends making their way over to their table. "But--" Hari tries to argue, and Y/N turns her head away from Hari "Not the time."

"This looks intense." Hyunjin's friend, Jisung comments as he raises his eyebrow in amusement. Y/N gives him a kind smile "No, Missy, why do you look so grumpy" Jisung questions as he ruffles her hair and sits beside her and the rest of the guys go to sit down. Hyunjin stands behind Jisung with his eyebrows furrowed as he stares between the pair, jealousy fills his stomach. "Hyunjin, there's a seat here" Li-Rin calls him gesturing for him to sit beside her, his mouth hung open for a moment wanting to protest but in the end, he slumped his shoulders and trudged over to the seat beside Li-Rin. He grumbles something under his breath toward her and she rubs his arm comfortingly as she whispers something to him and he nods with a sad pout.

An uncomfortable feeling fills Y/N's stomach as she stares at the pair, when did they get so close? Hyunjin said they had gotten along a little easier after Y/N had left her to watch him; but could things have gone further than a friendly understanding being built? Y/N tried to focus on the conversation Jisung had dragged her into but with Li-Rin's previous confession, Y/N could not drag her eyes off the pair. She felt betrayed, how could Li-rin do this to her? No matter how often Y/N denied it, there was a reason the girls always made jokes about her and Hyunjin being together. Li-Rin could see her closeness with Hyunjin, even if she didn't have feelings for him, liking Hyunjin would be crossing the line for any of her friends and they knew this.

Li-Rin was a newer addition to the group, Y/N had met her in her first year and they quickly hit it off. Y/N's longest female friend, Hari, always held a small dislike for Li-Rin. Sol-i and Aera held a neutral stance never showing her disdain but also never getting too close to her. Y/N was the one who trusted her wholeheartedly and accepted her.

how could she like Hyunjin?

Was she messing with her? She had to be. It had to be a joke. How could Y/N confess to him if her friend likes him? That would be so cruel to Li-Rin, no matter the line crossed Y/N wouldn't stand in her friend's happiness. Li-Rin didn't choose who to like, these things just happen. If anyone understood that it was Y/N, but why did it have to be now? Why couldn't it be last year? Long before Y/N really understood how she felt about him and she wouldn't feel like she's being a terrible person if she were to confess. Now that she knew Li-Rin liked Hyunjin, Y/N felt panicked as she watched the way he smiled at her while they talked. While he kept a small distance between himself and her, Y/N could see some form of a connection built between the pair. It left her unsettled as one question lingered on her mind.

Does Hyunjin like her too?

Y/N felt herself panicking during her cram school.

Hyunjin went to study with Li-Rin and Jisung. She felt herself growing nauseous at Li-Rin confessing before Y/N could talk to her about her expose at lunch. She watched the clock as the time continued to drag on. It felt like an eternity as she watched the clock a minute away from 10:30 pm.

As soon as her cram school ended, Y/N quickly made her way to the bus stop and pulls out her phone to text Li-Rin.

As she reads Li-Rins last message, Y/N feels her heart sink into her stomach and she drops her phone as if the device had burned her. Looking around in embarrassment hoping no one saw her, she quickly grabs her phone off the ground in front of her as the bus pulls up and she gets on. Walking toward the back of the bus she sits in a seat in the second to last row, leaning against the window her mind races,

What did she say?

Y/N read the message over and over again, hoping it would change. She felt bile rise in her throat as she contemplated what to reply. She wasn't sure what to do. How should she respond? What could she do? Was being a good friend saying yes? She wasn't sure if she even wanted to. How could she set the guy she likes up with anyone, let alone her friend? She felt tears prick her eyes as she struggled to find an answer as she felt someone tug on a strand of her hair.

Chalking it up to an accident Y/N stares out the window at the bright lights of the city. She almost loses herself in her emotions when she feels the person behind her tug on a strand of her hair again. Feeling irritation swell in her gut she turns around to cuss out the person. "The hell is your--Jungkook Oppa?" She questions her eyebrows scrunching together in confusion as the older male sat there with a mischievous smirk. "Finally you notice me. You know you're quite elusive" He comments with a chuckle. "I tried to say hi when you sat down but I don't think you heard or saw me"

"And you thought harassment was a good way to get my attention?"

"It's fun to annoy you. You look like crap though what's up?"

Y/N rolls her eyes at his comment "Cram school. Why do you always seem to piss me off every time I see you?" Jungkook shrugs as he shifts to sit next to her. "What's up though? Cram school sucks but it doesn't usually make you cry." He questions worriedly. Y/N crosses her arms over her chest and shrugs. "Nothing...Just stupid stuff I guess." She groans. Jungkook shakes his head "Every problem seems like the end of the world at your age but if you talk to someone older they usually seem small" He tries to convince her to open up as he bumps her shoulder with his.

Feeling her resolve crumble to dust, Y/N rambles "Ugh, It's nothing--just you remember my best friend?"

"Vividly"

"Well, my friend said she might like him and ever since the night of the party I've been freaking out because he kissed me and I liked it" She states as her speaking speeds up slightly "But I never used to like him like that before so I wouldn't have cared if my friend liked him before but now I do like him so I do care that my friend likes him" Jungkook stares at you blankly. "Jesus fuck I think you gave me a stroke trying to keep up with all of that" Jungkook jokes as he rubs his temples. "So what you're saying is you and your friend both like Hyunjin?"

"Yeah..."

"Okay? and why is that your problem?" Jungkook asks seriously raising his eyebrow. Y/N's eyebrows furrow in confusion "What do you mean? We both like the same guy, that's wrong..."

"Who told you that?" Jungkook questions with a puzzled look on his face. Y/N stares at him dumbfounded and he sighs "Look kid, there's nothing wrong with you both liking the same guy. It's how you both handle it that will determine if it's wrong to like him or not. Does she know you like him?" Y/N shakes her head "She asked me but I just figured out how I feel so I told her no, but it's cause I thought I would have time to figure out what to do"

"Then you can't be mad at her for anything. You lied so you should fix that first, then you should tell him how you feel and let him determine who he wants to be with before you girls go fighting each other." Jungkook advises.

"She asked me to help her go out with him....am I a bad friend if I don't do it?"

"You are if you lie to her about it" Jungkook shrugs as he sighs "To be 16 and only worry about stupid shit like this again" He states in a wishful tone. "You aren't that much older than me" Y/N comments. Jungkook lifts his hand placing his index finger over her lips as he closes his eyes "Shhhhh....I'm reminiscing"

"Well, Ahjussi, you said you went to Seoul national and lived on campus right?"

"Uh-huh, why?"

"Cause we're driving past it" Y/N points out the window and Jungkooks eyes snap open as he jumps up from his seat staring out the window before he pushes the button signaling a stop and it pulls to the side of the road when it can. Y/N stifles a laugh as she covers her mouth with the back of her hand. "You're embarrassing Oppa" she comments.

"Shut up! but remember what I said" Jungkook waves her off as he rushes off the bus.

Jungkook was right....

It was childish to expect for friends to not eventually like the same person one day. It's a normal obstacle while growing up and people can't control who they develop feelings for. Is what Y/N told herself, but for the past two days every time she saw Li-Rin and Hyunjin together; she wanted to put her head through a wall. It didn't help they were paired up for a project in their class and the time they had spent together doubled as Y/N's time with him dwindled more and more.

While she still occasionally was able to hang out with him in the mornings and at lunch, something felt different about their interactions. They were distant and withdrawn and it felt odd. Y/N wasn't used to not having her best friend cling to her. But for the past few days, she couldn't remember the last time Hyunjin had any physical contact with her. Y/N found herself drifting off into thought as she sat at a table in the library, Li-Rin asked her to study with her earlier in the day and Y/N felt the need to talk to her about her request.

Y/N struggled to find a way to bring it up. How do these types of things usually go? What was it Jungkook said again? She contemplated as her mind went a mile a minute. Honesty. start with honesty she sighs to herself.

"Li-Rin...." She gasps. And the girl perks up lifting her eyes from the textbook "What's up hun?" Li-Rin gives her an innocent expression as Y/N feels her heart sink into her ass. "Uh, S-so you remember what we talked about the other day?" Li-Rin gives her a confused look "What? Hyunjin?"

Y/N nods "Well i wasnt exactly honest with you guys"

Li-Rin shrugs "Kinda figured..."

Y/N looks at her lap in shame "I'm sorry but I don't feel comfortable setting you up with Hyunjin." Li-Rin's eyes widen in surprise "Woah! no it's fine, we already talked and are hanging out alone Friday and stuff" She confesses almost as if she is rambling. Y/N feels her heart stop "Oh? Y-You confessed?"

Li-Rin looks around, a look of panic on her features. "Uh--Y-Yeah...sort of..." She states as she nervously looks down at her textbook, mumbling something under her breath. Y/N's blood runs cold "O-Oh..." she stutters as she bites her lips hesitantly.

Li-Rin looks at her apologetically "Y/N..--Don't let this get in the way of our friendship okay?" Y/N cuts her off as she chokes back her sadness and gives her friend a reassuring smile. "You said you sort of confessed so, I'll take a step back and if he officially says yes to you then I will work on moving on." Li-Rin feels guilt eating away at her. "I'm so sorry, Y/N..."

"Don't be. If he says no to you, then I'm gonna confess...it won't be right after and I'll be there for you wholeheartedly, and you'll still feel complete support from me no matter what okay? But I do think that, if he says no to you, then I deserve to have a chance to see if something could work out between us.....because with our history I really think it can..." Y/N confesses. "So, I'm going to be a bad friend for this one time and this one time only, because you surprising me with your feelings like that wasn't fair, I hope things don't go as you planned and whatever you plan on doing a bird poops on your head while your confessing and he laughs"

Li-Rin gives her a bewildered expression "A-are you alright in the head? You want a bird to poop on me when I confess? What if I'm inside?" Li-rin questions teasingly.

"Then I hope you fall....wait no that's mean no I don't. umm" Y/N struggles to think of something bad enough that she could laugh at her friend but not too bad she could be hurt. "I hope you pee yourself" Y/N exclaims excitedly. "Shhh" The librarian whispers in her direction and Y/N hides her face in her textbook as Li-Rin stifles a laugh.

“You’re an idiot”

Y/N felt her face fall at Hyunjin's obvious anger toward her. It had been two weeks since Y/N and Li-Rin had talked. while Y/N wanted to support her two friends' budding relationship, she felt nauseous and annoyed whenever Li-Rin and Hyunjin appeared together. Why not me? She'd wonder Why couldn't it be me? She felt guilt rising in her stomach. She had been avoiding him for longer, something about this year had changed her. Y/N didn't understand, before the idea of not talking to Hyunjin would be painful but since she had spoken to Li-Rin; talking to him hurt the most.

How was she supposed to move on? How could she be with someone else when, to Y/N, no one else could compare?

She couldn't handle it, and in the nature of honesty, she had kept her feelings for him to herself. Though every day she felt herself struggling to refrain from just marching into his bedroom and confessing. A snap in front of her pulls her out of her thoughts. "Polynomials are frustrating but not that much, which means you're not paying attention so you owe me 5 bucks" Jungkook states sarcastically. Y/N's eyes widen "5 bucks?! We agreed on a dollar"

"You weren't paying attention for 5 minutes"

Y/N gives him a look of disbelief "You took my job! You should know I'm broke." she exclaims. Jungkook shakes his head as he wipes the counter, raising an eyebrow at her "I'm literally working, tutoring you, and reading your texts at the same time" Her mouth hangs open as she goes to argue and Jungkook places his finger in front of her lips. "Shhh. Thank you, Jungkook"

"For what? Being nosy?"

"Being smarter than you"

Y/N rolls her eyes as Jungkook gives her a knowing look. "Don't okay? Hyunjin and I aren't your business" Jungkook snorts as he tosses the rag over his shoulder. Leaning back against the prep line "From where I'm standing there is no Hyunjin and you." Y/N shakes her head as she lifts her math textbook. "Not what we're supposed to be focusing on" She states as she gives the book a gentle tap on the counter. "You got distracted first" Jungkook puts his hands up in surrender. Y/N sits there, staring up at him expectantly and Jungkook raises his eyebrow "What?" he asks crossing his arms.

"Come on out with it..."

"Out with what?"

Y/N gives him a look saying 'Are you serious' with a tilt of her head. "I can literally see you trying not to combust. Holding back from just giving me advice because you know you're too damn nosy" Jungkook scoffs holding his chest in offense. "First of all missy, I'll have you know that you should feel lucky I care enough about you to be nosy." he narrows his eyes. "Oh thank you, I'll appreciate all the gold produced from your touch...."Y/N mocks. She jumps in surprise as she feels a sharp sting on her forehead as Jungkook retracts his hand away from her face. "Did you just flick me?" She exclaims.

"Anyway, why are you here with me, studying math when you could be with the guy you're in love with?"

"Because you'd miss me too much" Y/N smiles and Jungkook rolls his eyes "As much as I appreciate your presence, soul-sibling, I've known you for like 4 months at best and even I know that's bullshit" Y/N groans and covers her face in her hands. "Ugh, I just don't want to see him all over Li-Rin." Jungkook shakes his head giving her a disapproving look "If it was gonna bother you this much then you shouldn't have told her you'd support her if she confessed"

"You act like I knew it would bother me this much!"

"Is that why you haven't clarified our actual relationship to him?" Jungkook raises his eyebrow. "I'll tell him..."Y/N trails. It was Jungkook's turn to give a look of 'Are you serious?' "When? When he and Li-Rin stop hanging out?" Jungkook quips and Y/N smirks "Exactly"

"Bullshit! You're a minor that shit aint happening with my name"

"I'm kidding, Jesus old man take a joke." Y/N scoffs as she closes up her textbooks. Jungkook gives her a stern look "Clarify it or stop coming around me" Y/N's mouth hangs open in disbelief and Jungkook shakes his head in response "Don't give me that look missy. You not clarifying that we only see each other in a sibling way, makes me seem like a pervert." Y/N furrows her eyebrows in frustration "Can't I just make him jealous a little bit? I never insinuated that we like each other"

"No. I'm a fucking adult, Y/N. That's petty kid shit and honestly, you're above it too. You told Li-Rin you'd support her so keep your word or go to her and tell her how you are feeling about it." Jungkook shuts down her suggestion firmly but his tone held a caring concern. "Why do you have to be so annoying?" Y/N scoffs. Jungkook's eyebrow raises "Because I'm right?"

"Yes..." Y/N grumbled as she rested her chin on her hand looking away from Jungkook. "Stop avoiding your best friend too. It's stupid and gonna hurt his feelings. You already hurt him and pissed him off. Do you want to do more damage?" Jungkook lectures and Y/N rolls her eyes. "You do know you're not my real brother, right?"

"Really? You harass me like you're my sister though?" Jungkook scoffs as he shrugs "I mean, it's nothing for me to turn the register back on and cash this out"

"Okay, raising the white flag...hurry up so you can bring me home" Y/N raises her hands in surrender as she gestures for him to mop the kitchen. Jungkook rolls his eyes and shakes his head grabbing the mop

"I should've called out..."

One second....All it takes is one second for a calm peaceful day to turn into a storm.

Y/N sat in Jungkook's passenger seat feeling her drowsiness kicking in as he drove onto her street. The radio was playing some random playlist from Jungkook's phone, but Y/N felt herself finally relaxing for the first time in a while. Her mind sat free of worries and stress as she stared out the window. She felt excited as Jungkook pulled into the driveway. "wow you weren't lying..." Jungkook quips as he parked the car. "You really run a share house with your parents?"

"They come to manage it but they live like 10 minutes away in the same town as Hyunjin's parents. I usually decide residents after background checks since I live here and right now it's just me and Hyunjin and one other guy that's like always at work but he cleans up after himself and doesn't bother anyone so"

Jungkook shrugs as he nods "Want another tenant?"

"And live with 3 guys? I'd rather you hit me with your car." Y/N retorts. As the pair hears a knock on the passenger window, Y/N jumps in surprise. She turns to see an upset-looking Hyunjin peering into the car and she opens the door slightly. "Jinnie?" She questions "What's up?"

"Who is he?" Hyunjin asks as he stares directly at Y/N accusingly and she raises her eyebrow in confusion. "I'm Jungkook, we act--Was I talking to you?" Hyunjin cuts him off and Jungkook snorts "We've gotta stop meeting like this Hyunjin." Hyunjin narrows his eyes at Jungkook as he raises his eyebrow at him "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm not fighting a child. I'll see you tomorrow, Y/N" Jungkook waves Hyunjin off as he holds out his fist for Y/N, who returns his fist bump and exits the car. Y/N stands there as Jungkook drives off and gives him a wave. Hearing a scoff from behind her she rolls her eyes and turns to her best friend. "Jinnie,--no. I'm pissed right now. like are you dumb or just oblivious?" He cuts her off and Y/N stares at him confused. "Hyunjin, what are you talking about?" A figure sitting on the stairs draws her attention, Li-Rin gives her a guilty smile and waves and Y/N looks back at Hyunjin even more confused. Why was Li-Rin here?

"Why are you spending so much time with that guy?" Hyunjin questions. "Like, can you not see that it's bothering me? How long do I have to sit there and just deal with this shit? What do I have to do to get you to look at me? Be your best friend? Support you in everything? kiss you? Oh wait, I've done every single one of those things, and still! still, I'm not enough for you? What is it going to fucking take, Y/N seriously" His voice growing more and more erratic as he stares at her with desperation on his features. Y/N feels her heart race at his rant, what does this mean?

"J-Jinnie...I didn't realize it was bothering you so much. but I don't know w-where this is coming from..." Y/N trails "You're more than enough for me. I don't understand?" Hyunjin groans in frustration "Can you seriously not tell I like you?" Y/N feels butterflies in her stomach her eyes widen and her cheeks turn a bright scarlet, but just as soon as she feels her excitement, guilt replaces it. Her eyes drift over to Li-Rin and she feels Hyunjin's hands encase her arms "Fuck Li-Rin..I'm talking to you!"

"Wow...Thanks dude" Li-Rin retorts sarcastically.

"You know what I mean!" Hyunjin snaps at her "Why are you still here?"

"Jisungie told me to be nosy" Li-Rin quips as she leans back on her hands. Y/N stares at them puzzled. As Hyunjin turns to her "Go home. It backfired and I'm not in the mood right now." Y/N furrows her eyebrows as her ears perk up. "What backfired?" She questioned as she stared at the pair. "Nothing...Li-Rin just agreed to help me and it didn't work" Hyunjin grits as he scowls at Li-Rin who scoffs "It was a stupid plan. How am I supposed to pretend to have a crush on you when I'm dating your friend?"

"Jisung did fine...." Hyunjin argued.

Y/N feels like a bucket of ice was poured over her head. Li-Rin pretended to have a crush on Hyunjin? To help him? Y/N couldn't help the feeling of betrayal that welled up in her chest. Tears burned in her eyes "Y-You guys made a plan?" She questioned in disbelief, her voice just above a whisper. Hyunjin looks at her with guilt in his eyes "I-It wasn't anything bad I promise you...I just wanted to know if you felt the same way" Y/N ignores him and stares at Li-Rin "Am I a joke to you?" taking a couple of steps so she is directly in front of Li-Rin and Hyunjin grasps Y/N's arm pulling her slightly back "Its not her fault..." Y/N shoves his hand off her as she steps back in front of Li-Rin and nods waiting for Li-Rin to answer.

"Of course, you're not a joke to me..."

"So you're expecting it correct?" Y/N asks and Li-Rin nods. Y/N brings her hand across Li-Rin's cheek harshly. "Y/N?!" Hyunjin exclaims in shock as he pulls her back from Li-Rin, who stands up and waves him off "Don't.....I deserved that" Hyunjin shakes his head "No, this is my fault I'm the one that asked for help" He argues to Y/N. Y/N looks away from him as she rolls her eyes "She's a big girl that can make her own decisions." Li-Rin nods as she pats Hyunjin on the shoulder. "See you tomorrow, Y/N" She waves as she walks down the street.

Hyunjin and Y/N stood there in silence for what felt like an eternity before anyone spoke. "Baby,--oh you thought you were pissed." Y/N cut him off and Hyunjin's body deflats. "You manipulated me..."

Hyunjin's eyes widen in a panic "N-No, it wasn't like that I swear" He stammers as he steps closer to her. His heart sinks as she takes a step back "Y/N..." She sighs at the dejected tone in his voice. "Jinnie, Just-just give me a second okay?" she states as she takes a deep calming breath. "Can I ask why you couldn't just talk to me?"

"You always think I'm joking or drunk or bored.." Hyunjin pouts. "How could I ask if you liked me like that? You always said I'm your best friend so I never thought you'd look at me like that" Y/N sighs as she rubs her hand over her face. "We're dumbasses....just straight-up fools I swear" She mutters, and Hyunjin raises his eyebrow in confusion "Huh?" "Nothing, we just both are stupid people who forget the other is our soulmate. Jinnie, of course, I like you that way, how could I not? You're literally everything I would want in a guy" She confesses as she goes to walk inside to bring the conversation out of the cold before it dawns on her "Hold on," She points as she turns back to Hyunjin with a quizzical look "You said I always think you're drunk or joking" a panicked expression flashes across Hyunjin's face.

"You were drunk that night right?"

"I--Well, you see what had happened was..." Hyunjin trails and Y/N's mouth hangs open as she closes the front door. "Nope, you stay in the cold until the conversation is over now. Hwang Hyunjin, I swear to god if you made me basically carry you home and you were almost completely sober I'm telling you now that I will disown you" Hyunjin shakes his head "Was tipsy at best I promise" He puts his hands up in surrender. "Wasn't as drunk as I made it seem 'cause I wanted to kiss you and you always let me when I'm drunk" Hyunjin explains cautiously. Y/N rolls her eyes at him "So you're manipulative? You realize that's a giant red flag right?"

Hyunjin nods "I'll be color blind if you do..."

"You already know, basically born that way" Y/N jokes with a shrug and Hyunjin rolls his eyes at her as he wraps his arms around her waist. "So, we are like, dating now right?" Hyunjin asks as he rests his chin on her shoulder. Y/N shrugs as she doesn't respond pretending to contemplate her answer. "Babyy~" Hyunjin whines as he begins placing soft pecks along her neck. "Don't torture me" Y/N shakes her head and turns around wrapping her arms around his neck "So don't ask a stupid question" She retorts as she scrunches her nose at him.

Hyunjin gives her a small chuckle before pressing his lips to hers engulfing her in a passionate kiss. Their lips danced together before Y/N pulled away "I knew you'd be a better kisser sober..." She joked

"Shut up...."

taglist: @yangbbokari @lovesunshinefelix @tr-mha-fan @threeopossumsinacoat

[deonsx]

Good Girl For Them

Feat: Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor

Content: obscene speech

Dazai Osamu

You wanted him at work You wanted him at home you wanted him everywhere but he wasn't interested in you these days you knew what a serious guy he was at work

If it's a really serious business, you can never stop him, but it's been going on like this for 1 month, he doesn't take care of you, sometimes you even suspect that he's coming home, he sleeps at work or comes home for 2-3 hours

There's nothing he can't do in his job. A mission was more valuable than his own life. You tried to talk to him, but he promised you to pick up where he left off after his mission

But you really didn't like to put up with it, you were going to sleep alone tonight like any other night. But tonight you were feeling horny just like any other night, the only difference was you didn't want to deprive yourself

You wanted to touch yourself but you hesitated but you really started thinking about him you closed your eyes slowly undressed..everything was normal until you moaned his name "osamu..hah" you sighed your fingers went deep until you heard that voice

"So that's how you satisfy yourself while I'm gone, bella”

Your eyes widened at the sound you heard and I quickly sat up, "Osamu? It's not like that-" Osamu put his hand in his hair and scratched his face with a slight anger, "If that's what you want"

You couldn't speak, and he sat down slowly on the coffee table across the bed "Hm? What's the matter sweetie"

He was looking at you as if he was expecting something, you swallowed...you got out of bed and knelt in front of him "So cute" Your hands went to her pants and you unzipped them

“You're a good girl, aren't you?"

Chuuya Nakahara

You were working in your office and your boyfriend was front of your desk, and next to you was a boy who had just joined the team

You were all reviewing and organizing the documents the Boss gave, but you talked a little too much with the boy next to you and you got chuuya's full attention

The boy bent down in your ear to tell you something, suddenly the table slammed into the floor hard "what the hell are you talking to my woman?" looking at the boy, chuuya asked

The boy didn't answer and you didn't talk he just told you something about work and it made your boyfriend suddenly angry but you didn't find him wrong so you kept your silence

"We're leaving! We're done here for today, but you'll take care of the files for us" He made fun of him and grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you out of the office

He quickly pulled you into a corner. "Why are you letting him talk to you? Or does he have something that I don't?" he asked in a serious and slightly elevated tone

You laughed at his angry face "my love it's not possible she told me something about work it would be silly to look at another man than you"

He grinned at you, "So that's it… will you do whatever I say?" You nodded your head yes

“kneel my love”

Fyodor Dostoyevski

These days, you didn't even have time to stop by the house where the two of you live together, you were constantly going on missions

You were secretly working in the Agency to spy, for Fyodor and you couldn't find the time for her these days, but you didn't care, you wanted to give her important information and show her your worth

You were in one of those duties again and you were talking to the people in the agency, at that moment you felt a sense of being watched, but you thought it was not that important and continued the conversations

When it was evening, you finally came back to your house, your eyes were light sleepy, you saw him, you wanted to give the information as soon as possible and increase his confidence in you, in fact, you were doing everything for him

When you got home you saw your boyfriend Fyodor waiting in the dark "oh? didn't you sleep? I brought you good information" your voice rang with joy but no sound was heard from him

"Fyodor? What's the matter? Was there a leak in one of the missions—" he interrupted. "You think everything in my life is a mission?" You are stunned "I chose you as my girlfriend but you are not here even at night my dear?"

You didn't know what to say "I do everything for you... aren't you ?" your hair fell in front of your eyes, the man's eyes shone in the moonlight and he looked at you

"To happy me? Do you really want that?" You nodded but you thought to yourself did you really do all this to him but didn't he want it all this time? You looked forward to what he was going to tell you. Another mission? Or Assassination?

“Show me your Skills and kneel under the table”

Request Are Open

[confusedemiposts]

Hi! How are you?? I hope you are okay! Are you still taking requests? If you are, I have a request: What if s/o is Oda Sakunosuke's little sister/brother and s/o REALLY looks like Odasaku(Oda Sakunosuke) Their hair colour, eye colour is the same as his And s/o joins to Agency. What would ADA would do? If you aren't taking requests, you can ignore this! But if you are taking requests and if you do this, it would make my day! Thank you!!

I'm on the floor I loved this! I hope you don't mind I did a small drabble for the whole agency as one at the start but only went into details with characters that knew Oda and added Ango. I didn't know what s/o was till half way so this could be seen as platonic or romantic. I hope you liked it and feel free to tell me if there's anything I'm missing

Familiar Faces 𓇢𓆸

Includes: Fukazawa (platonic), Ranpo, Ango, Dazai x Oda's younger sibling

Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort

Notes: Dark Era and season four spoilers!!! Slight Beast! mention but no spoilers (Fukazawa), Probably oc, not proofread, bad grammar, gn reader, reader is unaware that Oda was in the mafia, reader is implied to be over 18

Format: Headcannons/ Drabbles

Summary: Being Oda's younger sibling

The Agency

You suprisingly grew up a very normal life thanks to your older brother. You knew he had a dangerous job and admired him greatly, after all who wouldn't? He took in orphans and visited them daily, bringing you along too. It became your whole life.

The day everything changed left an indescribable ache in your chest, like a piece of your world vanishing, leaving behind a void filled with quiet memories. You had just finished up school that year but your whole life was gone, everything you had was gone and you didn't even know why. It took you a few years till you decided to use your abilities for good and find out what happened.

You ended up joining a detective agency filled with ability users who are all very helpful and kind. It felt so welcoming that you genuinely enjoyed working here..but however, you couldn't help but notice three who looked at you with a certain, almost sad familiarity—as if they knew you. You hadn't met them before but they knew you- or at least some part of you that you didn't know how, they knew him. It's unnerving because how do they know?

Fukazawa Yukichi

He'd recognise you immediately

Well at least who you're related too

He only met Oda once as a teenager

I don't think he met him again so I doubt he knows what happened (tell me if I'm wrong)

Might've heard that he wasn't an active assassin anymore

Definitely on guard when he meet you

Like a relative of a former assassin willing applying to be a detective?

But you were different

He could see it in your eyes that were full of emotions,loss and compassion

Unlike those eyes he saw years ago

You have never killed

It was a bit unsettling though

He needed to know of your intentions

He glanced at you and then back at the application form. He knew he recognised that name, he knew that tinge of red hair and those empty brown eyes that mirrored the features of that boy—an exact replica. To him it made sense to have this interview in the cafe instead of his office.

But the eyes he was looking into were different this time; instead of being void of any emotion it glinted with loss and nervousness. This was an interview, of course you were nervous as the older man continued to keep silent, you felt like he was judging your very soul but in reality he was wondering something else.

Finally he puts the sheets down and clears his throat "What motivated you to apply for this job?". He was curious, you were undoubtedly related to the assassin so why are you applying to be a detective? What were your intentions?

Trying to calm your nerves, you took a deep breath. "I want to do good. I want to help people, like my brother."

He didn't react, but it was evident he was waiting for further explanation, especially regarding the mention of your brother. The silence hung in the air, prompting you to delve into the details.

Hearing your explanation of Oda surprised him

He didn't know any of this (I think)

To know that kid changed into a caring young man and raised his sibling and the orphans

Those eyes that were once lifeless, with no care for his life or anything, had changed

Said he must've been a good man

I think Fukazawa would've tooken Oda in like Ranpo back then :( maybe that's what happened in beast

He gave his his condolences when he found out he died

The waitress in the café came and asked if you two were ordering

Fukazawa ordered something small

You ordered a curry, spicy specifically you said

Fukazawa officially hired you when you passed your entrance exam

He knew you were a good person

I'd like to think later on he might tell you that he met Oda when he was a teen

Edogawa Ranpo

He met Oda twice

First as teens

And last in passing as adults

He tried to stop him :(

When he first met you he instantly knew you were related

He also knew that you were trying to find out how everything happened

I don't think he'd tell you at first for your sake

But as you get closer as friends maybe he would

Somewhat guiding you into figuring it out yourself

Ranpo doesn't act like it but I think he cares

You're having a bad day and about to snap?

You find a sweet you don't remember putting in your pocket

It's very small acts but it comforts you

Alone at your desk, with everyone gone home , and you asked if you could stay over a little to longer to finish something you'd been working on for months– finding out what happened that day.

Coming home from school, you headed to the curry place where you and your older brother always ate, where the orphans were cared for. Instead, you found chaos – police, bystanders, and a devastating revelation from an officer.

Devastated, you waited in grief for your brother, only to discover he was gone too. Everything you knew and loved vanished, leaving you desperate for answers.

You've been building up this personal case for months, you weren't that suprised to find out Oda was a mafiaso and former assassin but god still not knowing why everything happened still gnaws at you, Your world was taken, and the lack of understanding weighs heavily on your chest.

You groan and slump against the desk, the frustration of not knowing amplifying the ache in your chest. You felt like you were getting nowhere.

You felt a tug on your shirt and you lift your head up startled to see Ranpo leaning behind you. He doesn't bother asking why you're still here because he already knows but when you're about to ask him the same question he shushes you with his finger and pulls out a bag of sweets "I left these behind". That's a lie- unless he really wanted these specific sweets that he so happened to leave behind.

He pulls up a chair beside you, the wheels squeaking from only slight movement and plopping himself down.

Silently he offers the bag of sweets, you presume he wants you to open it and you do, going back to your papers after but he offers you the now open bag again, a silent invitation to take one.

You mutter a quiet thank you and take a sweet. It's silent as you both eat the sweets but it's a comfortable silence.

Osamu Dazai

Oh my god

I can't

You knew Dazai back when Oda was alive

When he came to the house or orphans

I'd say you got along

Oda definitely told Dazai to refrain from mentioning the mafia to you

And he kept to that no matter how many times you asked Dazai about how he knew your brother or what his job was

You were probably somewhat friends :(

Didn't see each other for four years until you joined the agency

At first you didn't recognise him

He's wearing less bandages

But he certainly recognised you

An exact image of your brother

I feel like there's two ways this could go

1. He completely ignores, distancing himself from you

2. He's completely all over, absolutely protective of you and making sure your okay at all times

I think it be both

You found that everyone was quite welcoming at the agency and you got along with everyone... although there was one who always avoided you no matter what.

And that was Osamu Dazai.

The moment you stepped into the office his heart dropped as if he seen a ghost, his facade halting only for a moment before he picked up his usual demeanor again. Quietly slipping away before you see him

He'd be stupid to think you wouldn't recognise him but he ignored you anyways. Oh you're coming back from a case? Where did Dazai go? He suddenly vanished (sarcasm). You try to approach him? He is sprinting the other way.

He cannot look at you at all without thinking about Oda, he will not let you close to him again because everything he never wants to lose is always lost and he doesn't want to lose you too.

He is trying to distant himself from you, he doesn't want you to get hurt, he wants you to be safe, he wants you to live the normal life that Oda tried to give you, he wants you- your gaze, your words, your touch-and it scares him, everything worth wanting is lost the moment he obtains it, that is the life of Osamu Dazai.

Though he ignores you directly, he watches over you through other means, making sure in any plans your safety is first, that your teamed up with someone dependable and your getting home safe after work.

But Dazai can't run away from ghost's forever, not when that ghost is at arms length. He always manages to slip away when you try to even speak to him but not this time- you got him cornered, he has no choice but to see his past once again.

I don't know how to write confrontation so just wheater you argued or broke down crying

He will realise he can't keep you away

Perhaps he'll let you close again

But not too close

He knows very well that you see his facade

Being with you he doesn't have to keep his bubbly mask on

You'd both sit silently together by Oda's grave

The silence is not deafening with you, it's calm, a silent mutual understanding between you

He would definitely have nightmares of losing you too

Too the point I don't think he'd leave your side

Constantly hovering around you, partnering up with you everytime so he knows your safe, knocking at your dorm in the dead of night because of a nightmare

It's silly he thinks but still it worries him deep down, after all he is human

Ango Sakaguchi

I know he's not part of the agency

But I think he helped you get into it

I think Ango would've taken care of you:(

Not directly but from afar

He'd feel too guilty

Finding out that you were looking for a job involving where you could get hurt he immediately directed you to the Agency

Partially because of Dazai

He knew he would watch over you no matter what

And you'd have each other :(

[hymnserendipity]

Ran Haitani middle school crush

Fluff, no gender mentioned.

Being a Bonten executive, Ran knew he had to be carefull while going around, even a simple coffee break could lead to a open war between Bonten enemies, but there he was walking in the daylight throught a shopping street in Roppongi. There you were. He was looking the window of a luxury shop, a glance of your face captured his eyes.

His middle school crush, the weird, funny and beautiful person he never confessed feelings for, walking on the street.

His eyes suddenly locked on your reflectiob, when he saw you.

He couldn't believe his eyes.

It's you, the one from his middle school he had a big crush on.

Now you had become so beautiful.

Without even thinking he immediately start walking and go after you.

"hey wait." he called, and when you stopped and turned around to see him... his eyes widened in surprise.

"RAN!!" You say, smiling brightly. He was stunned as you smiled at him, speechless staring at you

but finally he snapped out of it, trying to act calmer but inside he was very excited.

"It's really you huh. I can't believe it." he said looking at you with bright eyes.

"Wow you changed so much" he laughed lightly.

"That's right. look at me now, no more the wimpy glasses middle schooler you used to see huh?"

He put his hands in his pocket and smirked, flexing his muscles a little.

"You look different too" he said in a low voice.

Ran approached you and stood in front of, the height difference between you was more clear now, he was much taller than you.

"Wanna grab a coffee?" You suddenly ask. Ran was surprised by your question, but smiled and nodded, agreeing happily.

"Sure, I'd love to" he says in a casual tone, starting to walk beside you as you lead the way, then realized something and suddenly stopped.

"Wait, are you already dating anyone?"

He asked suddenly. He was so used to fuck around that didnt think that wasnt the right way to approach her.

"No" you reply, without looking at him.

Ran couldn't help but feel a little happy to hear you wasn't currently in a relationship, he always thought of you but with everything that happened in his life he never thought to reach out for you.

Ran then continued walking beside you.

"That's a relief. I would hate to think I missed my chance."

he smirked, glancing at you as you laugh along.

"I must say, you look a lot different than I remember. you've grown into a real beauty."

he said, looking at you from head to toe admiringly.

"Thank you. After you quitted school i got bullied, so i started to change a bit...." You didnt know he quitted school out of nowhere cause he went to juvie.

Hearing that immediately made him upset.

"Wait, what? you were bullied?"

he stared at you, eyes suddenly became intense and protective. "It's okay now" you smile. "Anyway, do you work Ran??" he was still upset, knowing he wasn't around and you got bullied but managed to act normal.

"Yeah, I work. I have my own businesses." he said vaguely, not wanting to give too much detail about what he does for a living. "A boring one?" he raised his eyebrow as you said that.

"Boring? how did you know that?" he asked with a smile, somewhat amused. "I don't know, just guessing frim your suit." he let out a chuckle, enjoying your laugh.

"You're not wrong. My work is pretty boring most of the time. But it pays well" he said casually. You two continued walking, approaching and then entering a nice coffee shop.

He held the door open for you.

"After you."

"Thank you, always a gentleman." he smirked at your praise.

"Oh, i try my best." he said jokingly, then followed you inside.

He found a table and sat down after you, when the waitress handed you the menu Ran immediately ordered a black coffee, then looked at you in anticipation.

"Order what you want, it's on me." You say, pointing out at the menu. He widened his eyes in surprise, didn't expect her to pay.

"Huh? you want to pay? you know I can do that myself right?"

He said in a bit awkward voice, he had never let a someone pay for him before. "I know. I'll order the bunny pudding rice cake and the peach milkshake" you say to the waitress with a smile. Ran couldn't help but laugh.

"you have a sweet tooth huh?"

"If you slap the bunny, his booty giggles, you know?" You say happy. He chuckled at your innocent smile.

"Really? It can do that?"

He looked at the bunny pudding rice cake in disbelief as the waitress gave you the order.

"Why would it giggle if i slap its booty?"

"Look" you slap it with a fork and it giggles.

Ran was stunned as the bunny's bum wiggled when you lightly slapped it.

he couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh my... I'm speechless, why did it do that?" he asked, slightly surprised and amused.

"Psysichs hahahah it's just the reaction of movements and materia, i suppose." You reply.

he continued laughing and shaking his head, amazed at that.

"You are unbelievable, you know that? I never thought something like that would exist, a pudding bunny that giggles when you slapped its bum"

he takes a sip of his coffee, amused, continuing watching as you ate excitedly, his eyes soften in admiration.

He was happy just being with you, it was as if time stopped.

Ran then looked at the bunny in her plate.

"can I try smacking it?" he said with a smirk.

"Sure."

He smirked, then suddenly

raised his hand and slapped the pudding bunny's bum, laughing out loud when the pudding wiggled again.

"Oh God, it really does giggle when I slap it" you smile, amused by his reaction. Its been a while since you saw a genuine smile on his face.

Ran almost forgot he is the executive of a criminal organization, tho he couldn't help but stare at your bright smile.

Ran was so immersed in the moment, it was like he was transported back to his middle school days, when he spent time with you after class at the library.

He suddenly snapped out of his thoughts and realised he was letting his guard down.

Ran remembered that he was a high-ranking member of a criminal organization and then put on his usually cool demeanor again, and looked at you with a poker face, as you peacefully eat. "have you at least put some sugar in that coffee?" You ask. He raised his eyebrow as you asked about his coffee.

"Just a little bit, i prefer it black" he said casually as take a sip from the cup, trying to act calm after getting carried away for a few moments earlier.

"Tsk, terrible"

he smirked at your disapproval of his taste in coffee.

"Terrible huh? I like the bitterness of black coffee" he took another sip, looking at you with a slight smirk. "not a fan of bitter stuff huh? you prefer things sweet then?"

he leaned his chin on his palm, still with a slight smirk on his face, looking at you intently.

You point at your pudding "absolutely "

Ran chuckled lightly. "I can see that." he takes another sip of his coffee before speaking again, this time with a more serious tone.

"By the way, I'm curious, what have you been up to all these years? I haven't seen you around after middle school." "I finished high school and went to college, then took two degrees in literature, few languages certificates and i'm working as a translator" Ran was impressed when he heard your answer, his eyes widened slightly.

"Two degrees in literature, huh? and a translator, that's amazing"

he leaned back in his seat, looking at you admiringly.

"I always knew you were smart in middle school, but I didn't expect you'd be a triple linguangual bookworm" he had a small, soft smile on his face as he continued speaking.

"You've made good progress since we attended the same middle school, i have to hand it to you"

"Now i have my place, full of plants, and work mostly from home" Ran seemed interested when he heard that you have plants

"You have a place filled with plants? sounds nice, you always loved greenery and plants in middle school too, remember we spend a lot of time in the school botanical garden?"

"Yes" you laugh. Ran smiled, reminiscing the old memories.

"You would spend hours just observing plants in the garden. and you always knew the names of the ones that i didn't even know existed. You really have a passion for plants and gardening"

"I miss those times"

He nodded, his expression turned a bit somber.

"Me too, those were good times. it's been a long time since we last saw each other, who would have thought we'd ever meet again like this?"

"Are you dating anyone?" he shook his head.

"No, no, not at the moment"

he said in a casual tone, but in truth, he had never been in a serious relationship before. he was too focused on his work as a member of a criminal organization to have time for relationships so he just hook up, and also he had never found a person that could make him feel the same way as he did when he was with you in middle school.

"Maybe i'll have a chance then" you chuckle, looking at your almost empty dish. He was surprised when you said that, but then he smirked.

'you have your chance, honey."

he leaned forward, looking at you with a intense gaze.

"I haven't forgot the fact that I had a big crush on you when we attended middle school"

You smile. "And i never told you i had a big crush on you too" Ran was not expecting that and widened his eyes in surprise.

"Wait, really? you had a crush on me too? why didn't you say anything?"

he looked at you incredulously, a bit frustrated thinking they had missed a chance back in middle schoolI wasn't sure you felt the same.

"You're kidding me, aren't you? how couldn't you tell I had a crush on you?"

He leaned back in his seat and ran a hand through his hair, looking a bit amused.

"I was practically obsessed with you, i followed you everywhere, always trying to be near you"

"If we had known probably know we would already have been married" you reply. Ran laughed and nodded.

"Yeah, probably. it's a bit of a shame we both were too shy to tell each other how we felt, maybe our story would have turned out differently if we had confessed back then" he leaned on her side of the table, his tone becoming slightly intense.

"But I guess it's not too late for us now" Ran looked at you intently, a hint of possessiveness in his eyes.

"Never too late" You smile and he smiled back, his eyes softened as he looked at you.

"That's right" he suddenly use his hand to gently touch your face, caressing your cheek lightly.

"I don't want to miss my chance this time. I want you, I want us to be together"

------

Thanks to my 12 readers!

[zerokurokawa]

I absolutely love your writing so I'm back for more!

I really like the whole song prompt idea since I usually listen to music while scrolling through here so I wanna keep that going.

This one is gonna be based on I'd Rather Go Blind by Etta James (or by Beyoncé up to you)

Im think cheater!bonten!Ran x singer!reader, where reader has known for a long time about ran's cheating but decides to not leave him. Reader would eventually have to perform the song (the one above) infront of bonten. I feel like when Ran finally realizes the song is about him he would try his hardest to push through the rest of the performance, he's ofc infront of Mikey and the others so he would try to stay and act nonchalant but wouldn't be able to due to all the staring coming from Mikey. (I also feel like the entirety of bonten would see reader as a sweetheart who's just trying to make it through) I feel like they wouldn't be fazed by his cheating but more so surprised about him cheating on reader of all things yk?

Omg that's a lot but I truly believe you can bring it too life!

(also please feel better soon!!!)

I'd Rather Go Blind | Bonten!Ran x Reader (Cheating) </3

You were talented, exquisite, poise, and perfect all around. How could this have happened to you? Finding out through the great vine of people and connections you had that Ran, your long time boyfriend, had been fooling around on you was not supposed to be apart of your life's story. Being a club owner had its perks, you supposed as you thought about the copious amount of women he came across while partying and running the damn thing. 

You often performed at this very club. You sang like an angel sent down straight from heaven and Ran often paid you extra on the nights that you took over to perform. People from all over the city would come and see you and they knew you by name, asking if you were the that was going to be putting on a show tonight. You were practically famous in Roppongi. 

Yet here you were, begging yourself to get it together after reading the messages that were sent to you anonymously through text about Ran messing around. You had a show to put on tonight, everybody was going to be there as well. As you gathered yourself together and looked in the mirror, a small tear fell from your left eye and landed on your cheek. You dabbed it off with a napkin and whispered to yourself, "Showtime". 

______________________________________________________________

There, on stage in an elegant evening gown, you stood. Smiling and greeting everyone while the thoughts of him being with another woman ran through your mind. You had told the backstage crew already which song you were going to sing, and it was a ballad towards your lost love. 

The music began and you saw Ran sitting in the crowd, smile glistening at you as you were his pride and joy. Disgust came across your face, as you noticed he had not a single clue that you knew. 

Something told me it was over When I saw you and her talkin' Something deep down in my soul said, 'Cry, girl' When I saw you and that girl walkin' around...

You continued to sing, watching as Ran was starting to shift uncomfortably in his seat. His face remained nonchalant as you reached the chorus of the song. Mikey and Rindou, who were sitting next to him, noticed his behavior and began to stare, questioning his nervous antics. 

I would rather, I would rather go blind boy Than to see you walk away from me child, and all...

Ran would finally get the hint, the song was directed towards him as he saw the anger begin to spread across your face. The lyrics, the body language, everything... he knew that you knew. 

So you see, I love you so much That I don't want to watch you leave me baby Most of all, I just don't, I just don't want to be free no...

It was this verse alone that made Ran stand up to leave. He had enough of the guilt, the embarrassment. He knew that Mikey and the others knew. He knew that you normally only performed upbeat pop songs, yet, you had chosen a ballad of lost love to call him out on his bullshit. 

And baby, baby, I would rather, I would rather be blind boy Than to see you walk away, see you walk away from me, yeah Baby, baby, baby, I'd rather be blind now...

As you reached the end of the song, Ran was left standing at the corner of the club. By the door, he waited until the last line. Once he heard it, he slammed open the door and walked out, leaving you on stage with a large crowd cheering for you. You had conveyed the message of your broken heart.

______________________________________________________________

Ran had snuck up behind you in the back of the club in your dressing room. He had tears in hi eyes but strangely enough, a blank look on his face. 

"It's over, isn't it?" He finally spoke as you looked at him through your mirror. 

"I'm afraid it is, Ran." 

"Would you ever let me explain myself? Would you ever let me redeem myself?" He begged. 

You couldn't speak. You were at complete loss for words as he tried to wrap his arms around you. Three years were down the drain. 

"No..." You said quietly. He unwrapped his arms and stood back. You looked up, eyes watering and makeup starting to run. You looked so beautiful when you cried, like a weeping angel with the voice of a siren. 

"Please... Y/n..." He begged once more. 

"Leave, Ran." He did as you said, but not without turning around once more to look at you; taking in all of your beauty. 

(A/N: I'm feeling a lot better, hope you enjoy this! It broke my heart just to write it.)

[swarvey]

I honestly love how you're writing and am trying to learn from it. Could I please request how they would be as parents? I don't care who, have fun with it. I just like reading your stuff ☺️

how he is as a parent | sdv x g/n!reader

after settling down together on the farm, you and alex decide to take the next step and bring a baby into your life.

a/n: awww you are so, so sweet! this actually means the world to me <3 alex was the main character who came to mind, but i'm open to writing more! enjoy <3

alex

absolutely cannot wait to be a dad.

he's thought about it countless times, especially when his father treated him badly

doesn't ever let himself become discouraged by his own experience though, he actually uses it as motivation

will definitely spoil the hell out of your kid, no matter what

the thought of alex with a daughter is especially heartwarming to me though ...

(definitely the dad to hunt down her ex bf)

"come on, honey, open the door," you sigh, knocking on the entrance to your teenage daughter's room. "you have to eat dinner."

no response, though your heart breaks at the sound of her crying quietly. alex walks up behind you, placing a hand on your shoulder. you place yours on top of it, looking at him worriedly.

"she still hasn't come out?" he asks, shocked. "here, let me try." you gladly let him take your place by the door, rubbing your face in exhaustion. you've been trying to coax her to come out for the past hour.

"honey, it's dad!" alex calls out. you can tell he's trying to sound normal, though the worry glazing his eyes gives him away. "why don't you at least open the door so we can give you a plate of food, sweetie? you shouldn't go to bed on an empty stomach, it's not good for you."

"i'll eat later, dad," she replies, her watery voice just barely making it past the door. "i'm not hungry."

he freezes. "are you crying?" he turns to you, concern washing over his face. "now you really have to open this door, sweetheart, or else we'll have to call robin over to fix it after i bust it down."

"alex!" you say, smacking his arm. "you are not breaking down this door."

"oh, i definitely will. i think you forget you're talking to a former aspiring gridball player — i have personalized routines for my shoulders, back, biceps, pecs—"

"okay, okay! i get it!" both of you hear your daughter sigh as she slowly opens the door, revealing her tear-streaked face and bloodshot eyes. "sorry for making you worry," she mumbles, falling into alex's open arms. you rub her back as she continues to cry, hiding her face in his shoulder.

"you have nothing to be sorry for," you reassure. "just tell us what's wrong."

alex lifts her face, pinching her nose playfully. you can't help but smile as he makes her laugh, more than glad to see her break out of her sadness even for a moment.

"that's completely right," alex agrees. there's a certain sweetness in his voice he only uses for his daughter. "you can talk to us, okay? what happened?"

she sniffs and wipes her eyes before replying, "my boyfriend broke up with me."

"he what?!"

any composure your husband had is thrown out the window. you stifle a laugh at your daughter's shocked face as alex picks her up effortlessly, carrying her bridal-style towards the front of the house with you trailing behind them.

"honey, where do you keep your tools again? i think we'll be needing your axe."

"dad, what are you—"

"or your sword! that would probably be more scary, right?" he pauses, turning to you with a smile. "i mean, i was pretty scared when i saw you holding a sword for the first time."

you and your daughter laugh loudly, tears forgotten as alex continues to storm around the house with her in his arms, demanding to know where he lives and how muscular he is. you watch idly, suddenly emotional as you realize his dream of becoming a good dad has become a reality. unexpected tears fill your eyes, just as they round back to where you're standing.

alex stops in his tracks. "now my other baby's crying," he sighs, "and i really have no clue why this time. well!" he sets his daughter down, ruffling her hair. "give me one second, princess."

"alex, don't you dare," you threaten, backing away. "i'm warning you!"

the night ends with your daughter happily eating dinner while alex pleads you to forgive him for tickling you.

[harrypotterfuryroad]

What was your journey with all this? Did you at one point blindly agree and then learn new things that changed your mind (like I did) or were you skeptical from the start?

so i was never all in, but i had plenty of friends that were, and when it first started taking off in my social circles (2013ish) i tried my best to keep up with the lingo and be supportive. after all there's a lot of stuff i know i don't understand and who am i to discredit people's lived experiences? my degrees are all in biology so i never bought into the "humans can change sex actually" line, but if the wishful thinking made someone's life easier then sure fine i guess.

the cracks first started to show for me when nonbinary started popping up as a concept. broadly i understood what it was trying to do, but my two instant questions were "isn't everyone a little masculine and a little feminine?" and "if people are uncomfortable with being sorted into box A or box B, how does building box C help them?" i kept asking (out of genuine curiosity) and no one could give me an answer that made sense. obviously i could rattle off now about how this is because the whole thing is built on stereotypes but i was still trying to smile and nod my way through it at the time

my time in my phd program really solidified things for me for a couple reasons. like obv it overlapped with the general rise to prominence of all of this so it was kinda hard to miss, but also i was in an area with a really strong gay community so i got to see firsthand how it took root and grew from there. i saw a prominent local lesbian activist get ousted from my city's lgbt council for butting heads with a tim, and i saw the gradual shift from gay men being super comfortable playing around with the boundaries of dress and behavior to continuous questioning if someone is "one of the dolls" now because he wore a dress once

but also my phd was specifically about a lot of the issues that pop up in this whole debate, like social stress, adolescent development, sex differences in adulthood, and even a little bit about how social media is replacing normal social interaction but isn't meeting the same needs, so i'm watching all this happen while i'm reading papers from as early as the 70s that are basically predicting these exact patterns (then covid hit and amplified everything i was already seeing)

basically i just got more comfortable recognizing when someone is scientifically illiterate but really good at projecting confidence. i had a couple friends who were on lupron (for its on-label use, not as a puberty blocker) and each one had a terrible time, with really intolerable side effects. i looked into it more and it turns out these side effects are really common, which made me think this is a drug that made it through clinical trials but hadn't really taken off commercially so the company is trying to clean up its image or find a new market for it (something we were trained to notice in my phd program). then the drug started getting touted as safe and reversible for kids, and i just finally let myself feel comfortable getting angry about that. if you're saying this drug is safe, you're either lying or uninformed. lupron is the same story as viagra (where its more well-known use wasn't its initial intended use) but with all the leverage of the biggest social justice movement of the day, and it doesn't take much to recognize that without that clout there's no way to positively spin the junk data it's producing

other things i looked into more where the party line falls apart as soon as you screen out the spin: the trans murder rate, the trans suicide rate, prevalence and mechanisms of DSDs, the impact of adolescent testosterone levels on adult physical performance, neurological correlates of gender identity, and what a chromosome is

[lvndrdaaze]

Hi hi! I saw that you're accepting req & i want to send a req if you don't mind (you can decline it, up to you)! Sfw headcanons/thoughts/one-shot (it could be anything) for wriothesley with gn reader who secretly writing a fanfic about him with the reader, wrio finds out about it 'cause he finds the paper with their handwriting (oof). Thanks in advance!

hiii! so I'm not usually accepting specific story reqs, but this tickled my fancy for some reason so I wrote a short-ish one shot, I hope you like it!! <3

(gn!reader, reader is an adventurer, one light swear ('asshole'))

Wc: 860-ish

Life Imitates Art

Tea with Wriothesley in his office was normally an innocuous affair. You'd come down to visit between your quests across Fontaine, and share a pot of whichever blend had taken his fancy recently while discussing work or literature or the latest performance you had seen at the Opera Epiclese. All of this while desperately trying to hide your attraction to the surely unattainable Duke.

So, when Wriothesley brought up something he had read recently, nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary. That is, until you had asked that fatal question.

"What was it about?"

Wriothesley's face lit up; he couldn't wait to tell you what the story had been about.

"Well, it was a romance story, about an adventurer and a Duke." His answer came in a light, conversational tone.

The whole world seemed to stop for a brief moment. The steady chug of machinery outside of his office went quiet. Even your heart had stopped pounding in your chest. Those papers you had lost...Archons, you prayed you had not left them in his office.

Meanwhile, he sipped his tea casually, hardly even looking at you as he continued to speak.

"The story was written from the adventurer's point of view, so you get to hear all of their deepest thoughts and secrets." Wriothesley said, glancing up at you with the slightest glimmer in his eye.

"I see..." was all you could manage to say, a hot flush growing in your cheeks as you dropped your gaze to stare into your teacup. He was toying with you, and you knew it.

"The adventurer had invited the Duke on a quest with them to Liyue, and they were staying the night in a hotel by the harbour. But, when they got there to check in, disaster struck- there was only one bed." He went on, an unmistakeable smirk in his voice now. "You see, it seemed the adventurer had some hidden feelings for the Duke. So, as you can imagine, sharing a bed with him would be quite the embarrassing situation for them."

"Yes, I can imagine." Your voice came out quietly.

"But, lucky for the adventurer, it turned out that the Duke had also been harbouring some...intense feelings for them. They barely lasted an hour in that bed together before the plot turned rather obscene."

You sighed, barely resisting the urge to facepalm.

"It was well written, all things considered." Wriothesley went on further, leaning back in his chair. Even without looking, you could feel the grin he wore in his words, the predatory gaze burning into your red cheeks as he knew full well he had you cornered.

"And I thought the plot was quite realistic, too."

That brought your attention back to him properly. Your head snapped up to stare at him, confusion written into your expression.

"What do you mean?" You asked in a low voice, a frown tugging on your brow. You didn't love the way he was toying with you in this moment, but his vague statement was enough to give you pause.

"I mean that I think a Duke like that really would reciprocate the adventurer's feelings." Wriothesley stated as though it were a simple fact. "After all, 'the warmth of their smile was enough to melt the ice that had shrouded the Duke's heart in coldness for so long'."

As he grinned wickedly at your gaping expression, you weren't sure whether to laugh or cry. This had been so humiliating for you, and this was the reason for his teasing?

"You're an asshole." You murmured, still burning bright red in a haze of embarrassment. Wriothesley chuckled softly, and pulled a couple of sheets of paper from his desk drawer.

"You left these last time you visited." He informed you with a wide smirk.

"Yes, I worked that part out." You huffed, snatching them from his hand. "And this is how you decided to tell me?"

He laughed again, a lopsided yet handsome grin on his lips.

"Can you blame me for having a little fun with it?" He asked, leaning forward in his seat to rest his elbows on the desk, mirthful eyes surveying you closer from this angle.

"I can, and I will."

But your voice didn't hold the bite that it should, and he recognised that.

"I thought the adventurer liked the Duke's 'dry wit and caustic sense of humour'?" Wriothesley teased.

"They changed their mind. The adventurer thinks the Duke is a cruel, cruel man."

Wriothesley laughed again, an expression of such smugness on his face, you couldn't help but stare. He was so handsome like this, so relaxed and gleeful.

"Well, if you ever change it back, I'd love to take you out sometime." The Duke said simply, dropping all pretence and glancing down to run his thumb over the rim of his teacup. Was that...a hint of pink in his cheeks?

Floundering. That was the word for what you felt. Like a cat tossed into a bathtub, you were in unfamiliar waters. Wriothesley was asking you out, but what could you do but accept?

"Alright, but you have to promise me you'll never bring this up ever again. Like, ever." You emphasised the words heavily, desperately, and Wriothesley flashed a mischievous grin.

"Sorry sweetheart, I'm not promising anything."

[vxntagedior]

hello! i've got a request if you don't mind. could you please write xavier x reader who's kinda like wednesday (in a way she's afraid of being seen vulnerable) but is really easy to make cry if it makes sense(?) maybe they're some kind of rivals and one day (a really bad day for the reader) xavier is a little too harsh on her (comparing her with some other girl so her competitive side who's rival with him is all "!!!") so she wants to go away to hide the tears but the boy is to mean this time so he follows her and see her crying. then she ignores him for 2 weeks bc boy needs to suffer a little. you really can do whatever you want with it it's just a thought. i always see reader being written as a badass but when a boy literally mocks her bad she's all oh please let me make out w/you<3 but cmon boys need to suffer a little too. deserve to be forgiven you know?? that's why i liked your aftermath the best! you're so talented i want to thank god for your brains! thank u in advance! take care! (sorry if anything's wrong, never wanted to make you uncomfortable)

adding salt to a wound

summary | after a harsh day, xavier just had to take another jab at you

pairing | xavier thorpe x fem!reader

warning | academic rivals to lovers, angst with a hopeful ending insecure!reader, their relationship is unclear at the end

word count | 1.2k

Just waking up in the morning, you already knew it was going to be a bad day. You spent the entire night last night on the phone arguing with your mother. What started as a normal catch up, turned into a screaming match between the two of you that probably woke up all the girls on your floor. 

Your eyes were still puffy as you cried yourself to sleep, your cheeks still a little swollen. You always hated crying, hated the pity that people gave you when they saw those tears, how it brought down your emotional wall, and letting people see you in a state that you hated. 

Your roommate didn’t comment on the subject which you were thankful for, hoping the rest of your day would go as smoothly as possible. Marissa, your roommate, the two of you weren’t always friendly with each other, constantly competing for that top spot in classes constantly. 

Going out for classes, skipping breakfast, trying to clean up your face to make it seem like you didn’t ball your eyes out for the whole night. 

Classes went as good as they could, none of your friends commented on your appearance, nor did they ask about your day yesterday. You stayed quieter than usual, listening to everyone instead of talking, something that they didn’t seem to notice which you were happier for. 

Coming back for the day, you liked the little moment of solitude you had before a Nightshades meeting. You were never good at keeping track of your time, constantly running late for everything, like you were now. 

Running from your dorm, trying to be as quiet as possible knowing curfew was coming up, making your way towards the Poe statue and down to the library. 

“You’re late.” God you hated his voice. Xavier had been a pain in your side since as long as you could remember. The two of you had just clashed the moment you met. It started as academic rivals but you soon were able to surpass him easily and since Xavier had made his mission in life to make your life as miserable as possible. 

“I was doing my history project.” You rolled your eyes, joining Yoko and Divina, as far as possible from Xavier. 

Before Bianca could start again, Xavier had interrupted her. “I don’t even know why you’re trying, we all know Marissa is gonna get a perfect score, showed it to us earlier.”

He knew that hit a nerve, everyone at Nevermore knew the academic rivalry you had with your roommate.

Ignoring him, you turned back to Bianca, Xavier letting out a smirk knowing he was able to get to you. 

Bianca continued to talk about the Rave’N and such, none of you really listening anymore. 

So you know who you’re taking?” Ajax was never the best whisperer, thinking he was, but everyone could hear their conversation. 

Turning his head slightly, Xavier could see you out of the corner of his eye, listening into his conversation. 

“Don’t know yet, I’ve been hanging out with Marissa a lot, maybe her.”

Your friends constantly teased you that your relationship with Xavier was soon to turn romantic, finally taking all your hate into passion. You thought about it, Xavier was handsome, he was an amazing artist, you couldn’t take that from him, and his personality was nice to anyone but you. 

As the meeting ended, you were the first one out of the library, making a beeline out towards your room. It was still fall, so the sun was starting to set, light still out. 

“Did you have to do that?” Divina glared at Xavier, “Look whatever relationship the two of you have is odd, but did you really have to hit her when she’s already down.”

Frowning, Xavier watched the rest of the Nightshades, making his way towards your room. Sliding past the housemaster and Weems, he knocked on your door praying you were the one to answer. 

Swinging the door open, your eyes widened seeing Xavier in front of you mid-cry. Xavier was just as shocked as you, never seeing you cry. 

“What do you want?” You sniffled, knowing you couldn’t keep your tears at bay. “Here to compare to Marissa again, go ahead, I’ve heard all day.”

Opening his mouth, Xavier tried to speak, his sentence never coming out. 

“Leave.” Your voice wavered, never giving him a chance to speak, you slammed the door in his face. 

Xavier stood there for a few minutes, taking in all that happened, reflecting on the two of you. It was best that he left you alone, leaving and going back to his own dorm. 

Going out for breakfast the next morning, Xavier watched as you came out, seeing you silently sit with your friends, giving them all a small smile, one that didn’t reach your eyes, making a face for everyone. 

During classes, you ignored him, during activities, you ignored him, during Nightshade meetings, you ignored him. He didn’t know how long it was going on, maybe almost 2 weeks at that point. 

Not keeping to his words, Xavier went to the Rave’N with Bianca, not that he truly wanted to. Seeing you walk in alone, your dress coming down to your thighs, you were beautiful. 

Xavier kept his eye on you during the dance, Bianca being annoyed, leaving him alone. All your friends were dancing with each other and their dates, seeing you sitting across the hall, seeing at a table alone. 

Your chin rested on your hand, just watching the sea of people dancing. 

Hearing the song change, a slower song, everyone eventually starting to couple up, holding each other close. 

Xavier saw how your face slightly dropped, seeing your eyes sullen, swallowing, Xavier got up walking towards you. 

Seeing the shadow in front of you, you looked to see Xavier standing in front of you, offering his hand towards you. 

Before you couldn’t even reject him, Xavier beat you to it. “You don’t have to talk to me, you don’t even have to look at me, but please dance with me?”

Looking down at his hand, looking back at him, before placing your hand in his. You let Xavier bring you out, standing closer to your friends, all who were looking at you and Xavier. 

Letting his hands fall to your waist, you wrapped your hands around his neck, happy that you wore heels. 

From the start of the dance, the two of you were barely close to each other, seeing a prominent gap between the two of you. Slowly, the two of you became closer and closer, ending with you, resting your head on his shoulder. 

Xavier rested his head on top of yours, swaying the two of you together. As the song came to an end, the two of you stayed together, still swaying together. 

Your face was turned to your friends, seeing the look on their faces seeing you and Xavier together. 

Still not talking to him, you pushed your face away, just simply looking at him. Xavier just smiled, looking down at you, seeing you give him a small smile before leaning back down on his chest. 

Wrapping arms tighter around you, Xavier continued to dance with you hoping the relationship the two of you had was mended.

fin.

[lycanthropyreturned]

How labels impacted and continue to impact my alterhumanity/therianthropy.

The first thing one may notice in the alterhuman community is that here are a lot- and I mean a lot- of labels. Therian, Otherkin, Fictionkin, otherhearted, otherlink, just to name a few. These can be overwhelming at first, especially when someone is just learning.

In the modern therian community I have noticed that there's a backlash against those who are learning. If someone gets a term incorrect, or misunderstands something, they are shunned, and called fake. This just pushes that person away from the community and its inherent hostility. Especially with so many labels inside a community, I think people need to learn to be more lenient, and to point folks towards resources that can help them learn and understand. How else is one supposed to learn otherwise?

With this, people can find labels to be restricting, and that's valid. Others can find labels endearing and comforting, and that's also extremely valid. Each person has their own preference, and as long as they aren't hurting anyone, there's no harm inherently from it.

I have been comfortable with the term therian for almost ten years now. I have watched the community grow and change, and watched myself grow and change. And with growth and change comes shifts in identity. It is and entirely normal part of life.

When I saw the overall context and community of therianthropy change, it at first startled me. Sadly, nowadays, when someone says therian, it is far from the textbook definition that they think of. People will think of children doing quadrobics, or homemade masks and frankly- tiktok. It frustrates me that in the present this is how therianthropy is perceived. I myself do not fit the modern "frame" of therianthropy (masks, quadrobics, etc), and I don't want to.

Now if you express yourself this way it is entirely valid. However it is also true that this is how the public sees therianthropy due to social media algorithms. It's also true that not everyone aligns with this kind of self-expression with their therianthropy.

So that made me stop and think. While I don't identify with the modern version of therianthropy, I am still a therian. I still identify as nonhuman, on a non-physical level, involuntarily. That makes me a therian. But do I need to call myself that? No, no I don't. Plenty of people who would fall under the therianthropy term do not identify with the term itself. After all, it is just a word, and what is language to an animal except nonsense?

I decided to explore more labels for myself. I had always contained myself strictly to the label therian. I had not given thought or any exploration to anything else. This was in part due to the backlash I knew I would get online, and in part a personal boundary. I had to overcome both of those to get to where I am now.

Through this search I realized I didn't necessarily need a label for myself. Sure, I may find comfort in it, and sure it makes it easier for other people to understand, but did I really need a specific label for my identity? My identity that only I truly know and experience?

The answer was no- but there was a hang-back. I personally find comfort and joy in the term therian. I am a therian and that will not change. And of course there was still a social stigma to have some sort of "label" for myself so others would know.

So I returned to my roots. Lycanthropy. I am inherently canine. I have always been and will always be canine- most strongly wolf. Some folks will retaliate this that wolf is the most common theriotype/kintype, but that's another story for another day. I have been obsessed and entranced with wolves and their mythos- especially the werewolf.

I don't use the term werewolf for myself. I don't view myself as werewolfkin. I am not the changing creature from mythology. I am a wolf, trapped in a human's skin. I am but just one wolf. I am no monster from mythology, however intimidating I wish I was- I am just a dog. Just a wolf.

Lycanthropy is the more "professional" term for a werewolf. However, lycanthropy has another meaning too. It is a form of delusion where one believes so strongly that they are one hundred percent physically an animal. Medical lycanthropy.

But I know I am human. I know my privilege as a human and I know, even on those full-moon nights, I will remain this way. But that's a simple fix. Thankfully the human language is vast and has many conjunctives. So all I did was put a non in there. Non-medical lycanthropy. I know I am human physically, but the person here is wolf.

So yes, while I use labels for myself, they are most definitely not something required, and I have experimented with that. Only you know your true self, and that's what matters. As long as you know your true self, what else is there to do? There is no need to explain to others if not desired, so why?

Afterall, they are just words, and what are words but nonsense to the animal mind. So be kind to your fellow animal. Help them along with their journey of education into this new world. If their views and experiences differ from you, respect that.

[sarnai4]

Tai Lung Analysis

For the longest time, 3 animated villains remained my absolute favorites and among them was Tai Lung. Years later, he still impresses me. I feel like villains normally fall into certain categories. Two of these are dangerous and sympathetic villains. Of course, these can cross and that's why I enjoy him so much. Tai Lung is constantly acknowledged as a threat and for good reason. The movie sets up Shifu and Oogway as the best of the best, so how can the audience feel anything other than concern when even these two kung fu masters are dreading Tai Lung's escape? It's the first time when Shifu even seems almost scared. As soon as we see Tai Lung, we continue to get this sense of how dangerous he is. The guy has a prison of 1000 rhino guards for only himself. He has a shell trap on so that he can't even move a muscle (outside of his tail). We're not only shown how the characters feel about him but how they try to keep him from being any more of a danger. It perfectly complements the flashback where Tigress is telling Po what happened when Tai Lung went on a rampage. Then as soon as he does break out, we see it's all true. Despite spending 20 years completely immobilized, Tai Lung probably killed all 1000 guards effortlessly. Strategically, he left the goose alive so that he could have a messenger. He doesn't even need the element of surprise.

That escape was beautiful on its own, but then Tai Lung continues to prove how dangerous he is by taking out the Furious Five, making it painfully clear that he could have killed them if he wanted. Again, he wants to send a message to Shifu. These are his new pupils? They're the best he has? Let him remind his old master of the quality he used to breed.

It all leads to the fight with Shifu which ties into why Tai Lung is also a sympathetic villain. He's not just some final boss for Po to fight. He's got a troubled past as well. I don't condone what he did, but it makes sense. Tai Lung was abandoned as a baby and raised with one objective-becoming the dragon warrior. This was what Shifu wanted from him. This was the one way he knew he could make his father proud. It became Tai Lung's life mission to the point of it no longer just being something that Shifu wanted for him. Now, it's the only future he can see for himself. When he finds out he can't have it, where does that leave him? He's spent his entire life working for this. Why would his only family, Shifu, think he was worth the effort of caring for him if it's all been a waste of time? Clearly, Shifu doesn't think he matters anymore because he said nothing when Oogway crushed his dreams. Even though Shifu never stopped being proud and caring for him, through the eyes of a child towards a parent, that's what Tai Lung saw: abandonment again. Another family deemed him unworthy.

The love between Tai Lung and Shifu never really ended. When Shifu finally apologized for training him so hard to reach the goal he wanted Tai Lung to have, we can see that it touched his heart. He's gone down the point of no return now, but it meant something to him. That's why he pointed out how he only ever wanted to make Shifu proud of him. These wounds never healed. If they had, he would have gone in, killed Shifu, and taken the scroll. There would have been no need to admit his past desires of being someone Shifu could be proud of and there certainly would have been no need to delay the attack after the apology. Yet, those twenty years were spent making his body and pain stronger. It's why he loses the fight with Po.

I absolutely adore how they did the fight at the end. They didn't try to make it seem like Po could actually defeat Tai Lung. He lost. Plain and simple. Tai Lung knocked him deep into the ground and read the scroll like he wanted. He won...but he also lost. Tai Lung lost because he didn't have a Mr. Ping in his life who could offer that love to say that he was special with or without the world confirming this. When Po saw the scroll was empty, his dad helped him by pointing out the power we all have just by believing. He always wanted Po to feel special even if other people didn't think that. Po didn't need to earn his love, but Tai Lung thought he needed to earn it from Shifu. So, when the scroll is empty, it's a second blow to his life being wasted. Not only did he work so hard only to be passed up, his goal in life was getting to read a blank scroll. This is when Tai Lung breaks. He can't take it anymore. Nothing in his life has amounted to anything but pain and he's got nothing to show for it but enemies. He lashes out in rage and hurt, easily being defeated. As a poetically depressing moment, it's the move that Po indirectly learned from Shifu that defeats Tai Lung. Shifu was the main reason Tai Lung turned into the villain he became and he was practically the one to destroy him too. Sadly, I don't think this could have ended any other way. Tai Lung has been hurting for too long for him to consider forgiveness now. He doesn't want the apology, he wants what he's worked for and that just became meaningless to him. There's nothing left for him but to reap the consequences of having the legendary battle. The only question is, who is his worthy opponent? Po for using the finger hold? Shifu for building him up and breaking him down? Or himself for being so consumed by his pain that he allowed himself to become a monster? We can each answer that for ourselves and these questions are why I love Tai Lung as a villain and character so much.