#no seriously leave your comments and what not i'd love to hear your thoughts

[chelseasdagger]

Teacher - Chapter III

Frank Castle x Inexperienced F!Reader

Summary: Frank invites you to hang out with him at a bar on the outskirts of town. After some good food, and lots of teasing, you get invited back to his place to take care of the problem you caused him.

Warnings: age gap (reader is in her early 20s), mentions of drinking and smoking, cursing, grinding, detailed handjob sorry, slight praise kink

Author's Note: I am so incredibly sorry for how long it took for this chapter to come out!! I had a lot of life issues that delayed this, but I'm pretty happy with how this turned out so please accept this super long chapter as my apology/holiday gift!! And if you want to be added to the tag list just let me know. As always, reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated :) Leave a comment or shoot me an ask!! I'd love to hear what you think!

Word Count: 9k

Previous Chapters: I, II

“So I was thinkin’… Said you didn’t get many experiences even after high school, right?” Frank asks. His voice slightly muffled through the phone, which is wedged between your ear and your shoulder as you drag the spatula over the food you’re cooking on the stove. He had randomly rang you out of the blue and, after attempting to control your breathing, you answered the call. This was what he chose to greet you with and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t confused by the topic of conversation.

“Good morning to you too,” you tease, the food sizzling as you flip it in the pan. “But no, I haven’t. Why? What’s up?” you question.

“There’s this bar on the edge of town,” he begins his offer. “Little bit of a drive but they got good food,” he explains. 

“Tempting…” you trail off, trying not to immediately agree just because it’s Frank. “Who all is coming?”

“Just me,” he replies. “That alright?”

“Yeah!” Your answer is too loud and far too fast to be playing it cool. After cursing yourself mentally, you try again. “Yeah, I was just wondering if it was a whole… get-together thing.” Your voice grows quiet at the end, not wanting to plant the idea in his head that you’d prefer it if there were more people.

Honestly, you were surprised he was reaching out this soon after the bonfire. It was one of the best nights of your life. Whenever you think about it, there’s this warmth that rushes through you; you’re not sure if the heat was from the big flames or his strong chest you laid against all night.

“Nah, just me. Just thought it would be somethin’ you might like,” you push the spatula around in the teflon pan as he speaks. “Plus it’s another thing off the list, right?”

“Yeah, it is! Thanks, Frank,” you say cheerily as you turn the burner off and open the cupboards to grab two plates.

“No problem, kid. Just thought about you, y’know?” You sink your teeth in your lower lip to calm yourself down before another thought comes to mind.

“Oh! When are we going?”

“Tonight,” he answers nonchalantly and your eyes grow wide. “If you’re free.”

You seriously weren’t expecting him to want to see you only two days since you two were last together. In your head, Frank is so calm and collected and you’re practically certain that this… thing you two have going on isn’t as big of a deal to him as it is to you. Still, you try not to question too much why he actually seems to enjoy having you around. Instead, you decide to just take the good as it comes.

“I am, I can do tonight. But I’m not sure I have something to wear. Is it like a club? Should I dress up or is it more jeans and—?” You don’t even realize when your voice picks up in speed and the questions fly out faster than you intend for them to, but Frank is quick to center you out of the beginning of your spiral.

“Just wear somethin’ cute, alright? I’ve seen some of your outfits, sweetheart, you’ll be fine.” You bite the inside of your cheek at his comment and inhale deeply before sighing. “I’ll pick you up at six, okay?” You hum an agreement as he confirms the time and say a goodbye before hanging up.

As you pull the phone away from your ear, you see an incoming text from your best friend drop down from the top of the screen.

“I’m two minutes away! I can’t wait to hear everything.”

That night when you got home from the bonfire, she had sent many texts in hopes of finding out the reasoning behind the newfound closeness between you and Frank. In your exhausted and slightly inebriated state, you told her that you would have her over Saturday morning to explain it all to her. You were much too tired to string the words together and you also know how she can tend to put her own emotions onto words; the last thing you needed was for her to hear the little arrangement you and Frank have and blow it out of proportion.

You set the table as you wait for her, making sure to leave a mug beside her plate for her tea that tends to be the staple of her breakfast. By the time the food is divvied up for each of you, there’s an impatient knock at the door. You shake your head with a smile as you open the door and she’s pushing past you as the questions immediately begin to roll off her tongue.

After guiding her to the small dining table in the kitchen, you watch her sit down and her eyes never stray from you. Her voice continues to fill the air as she talks over herself; there’s no distinct end to one sentence and the beginning of the next. By the time you’re sitting beside her and about to dig into your meal she finally covers her mouth, stopping all the enthusiastic queries she desperately wants to know.

“I’m gonna let you talk,” she mumbles behind her palms. You laugh at her attempts to force herself to be quiet and pick up a forkful of your food.

“I promise you it’s not as exciting as you think it is,” you warn her before popping the food in your mouth.

You start at the beginning—trying to skim over the details of your not-so-controlled crush on Frank as well as the more heated parts of the things you two have done together. Excited gasps fill the space surrounding the dining table and you watch as her eyes go wide when you mention it was his idea. Her mouth gets the better of her though and she begins to ask more questions while you speak. You make sure to answer all of them in time, save for a few chuckles here and there, before finishing your last bite.

“I actually have a question for you now,” you start again, watching as confusion washes over her features. “Frank called me this morning and he wants to take me out to this bar he likes. I just don’t know what to wear and I was hoping… you could help me?” You hesitantly look up to face her and you’re met with a beaming grin.

“Is this a date?! Is this the first one? Are you going back to his place after?” You shake your head once again as the sudden influx of questions fill the air.

“No, it’s not a date. I mean… I don’t think it is?” you let your thought process be shown aloud and watch as her giddy expression comes back to the surface. “It’s not! We’re just friends and he’s doing me a favor. I’m sure of it.” You decide then and there that you can’t afford to hold out hope and expect more than what he’s given you—which is already so much.

She raises her eyebrows up from behind the rim of her mug and you scoff at her knowing look. You brush your hand through your hair and try your hardest to not let your anxiety creep in about the idea of being on a proper date with Frank Castle.

And so together the two of you spend the afternoon diving through your closet together for something that could fit. It felt similar to a movie montage where the teenage girls toss different colorful fabrics through the air. With a growing pile on the floor of your bedroom, she gasps once you stand in the completed outfit.

“That’s the one!” she says excitedly before tugging you towards the bathroom. “Time for makeup!” She eagerly pats for you to sit on the counter while searching through your, admittedly limited, makeup bag. Doing the best with what she’s got, she gets to work on the eyeshadows and blush, finishing up with a curl of your eyelashes and combing mascara through them. You always loved how focused she got when it was time for something special; her tongue pokes past her lips as she concentrates, her eyes squinting to get the very last detail to sit right.

Once she’s satisfied, she spins you around to see yourself in the mirror and you’re actually surprised at how nice it all came together. You’re wearing an oversized, comfy jumper, tights that line your legs, and a black skirt that accentuates your frame. It’s not too fancy, but the black tights make your outfit more sleek and you silently hope that Frank will like it. As you fluff your hair up to give it some more volume, you thank her behind a wide smile.

A buzz of excitement rushes through you as you wait by the front door and hear the heavy revving from the engine of Frank’s van. You physically shake your arms in an attempt to let go of some of the nerves that built up and your friend gives you a quick hug.

“You got it, baby!” she encourages sweetly. “Have fun!” she calls out as you slip past the door. Making your way down your porch steps, you hear her shout something else from behind you. “Don’t do anything stupid!”

You chuckle at her warnings and make your way to the big, black van. You open the door and find Frank sitting with his elbow on his armrest and his head in his palm as he turns to face you. You stand there for a moment and await his initial reaction to your outfit. His eyes widen slightly before they rake over your boy, his lips parting as he takes it all in.

He brushes his thumb along the defined line of his jaw before sinking his teeth into his lower lip. His eyes settle on the small slit of the skirt that rests high on your thigh. There’s a pause for a moment before he finally speaks up.

“Told you you’d find somethin’ cute.” He fixes his posture and gives you a smile as you roll your eyes and sit in the passenger seat. Being with him felt easy now—of course there’s still the butterflies, which you’re expecting to make a permanent home in your stomach any day now, but it’s mostly when you’re about to see him. When you’re actually in his presence, it all fades away and you love how comfortable he makes you feel.

If you had told yourself a few weeks ago that you’d be on a half hour car ride with Frank Castle to the outskirts of town, she probably would’ve brushed it off as some sick joke. But here you are, sitting beside him and watching as he flips through radio stations until he settles on a classic rock song. You enjoyed getting to discover little pieces of him the more time you spent with him.

As he drives under the lamp posts longing the winding roads, you watch as the passing lights illuminate his face before it’s cloaked in shadows of the night once again. Each time you move underneath them, light showcases his features in a warm glow for mere moments at a time. You think your new favorite thing might be when the gleam seeps into the small dip in the bridge of his nose. That small highlight makes you smile and he catches it as he turns to look at you once you’re stopped at a red light.

“What is it?” he questions, his eyes squinting slightly as he looks at you. With a shake of your head, you face back to the light strung up in the air. His gaze doesn’t leave the side of your face though, and you know he’ll want an answer.

“This is just nice,” you shrug your shoulders. “Thank you for thinking of me,” you add. You want to make sure he knew how happy you were to be doing this, despite your quiet nature due to your fear of somehow screwing this up with your words.

“Haven’t even done anything,” he laughs softly.

“Well, I’m still enjoying myself,” you reply in a gentle tone. Frank doesn’t say anything more as he continues to look at you. The light changes and a green glow washes over your face, queuing him to face the open road once again. You glance down as his hand moves to the gear shift, trying not to focus too long on how the veins in his hand are accentuated as he curls his fingers around the knob.

Frank speaks up again after a moment and you quickly recenter your attention. He engages you in some light conversation and pretty soon you’re laughing along to his comedic storytelling. You don’t even realize you’ve arrived until he’s put the car in park and turns the key off in the ignition. Looking out from behind the glass in front of you, you see the neon lights surrounding the big, bold letters of the name of the bar. It shines brightly in the night sky and acts as a small beacon in the dark parking lot.

You look up at the sound of the driver side door closing and realize Frank has left the car. You reach for your bag that’s resting on the floor between your feet and by the time you move for the handle, he’s opening your door for you. It’s the first time you’re able to truly take him in. He’s wearing a pair of nicely fitting blue jeans and a grey jacket, complete with the black boots you’ve never seen him without. You can’t tell what he’s wearing under the thick material that conceals his chest though, and you find yourself hoping it’s something tighter and hugs his torso.

“You ready?” he asks, and you nod in response. “Alright, watch your step,” he warns and you feel his hand bracing your upper arm as you hop out from the slightly lifted van. Once you’re secure on the ground, the two of you begin making your way towards the entrance. As you pass by the cars parked in organized rows under dim lamplights, you begin to make out the few scattered people smoking and even spot a couple sharing a cigarette just outside the main doors.

Once inside the building, he shrugs off the jacket and you can finally piece together his outfit. Frank’s broad shoulders stretch the fabric of the dark blue button up shirt. It’s tucked into his denim pants and secured with a black belt. He fits the attire of everyone else here in the bar, but still stands over a head taller than the rest—not to mention infinitely more attractive. You try desperately to rip your eyes away from him, and in doing so, take in the scenery of the pub.

The bar is crowded but not so occupied that you can’t move. The loud, overlapping voices meld to create a soft droning that accompanies the background. It doesn’t stand a chance to the band though, whose loud amplifiers cause a shake in your chest with each note they strum. Polished wood lines the walls and there’s photographs of smiling people decorating them, forever cherished behind glass frames. It feels oddly homey, admittedly impressive for a place you’ve never stepped foot into before tonight.

You accidentally bump into Frank and he steadies you with his large hands on your waist. He’s staring down at you with a subtle smile on his face. He begins to talk but you don’t have the slightest clue what he’s saying; the song that’s playing is far too loud to hear the lower tone of his voice. Shaking your head with a frown, you let him know you can’t understand him and his smile grows wider. He then leans down, his fingers brushing your hair away from your ear before he speaks.

“Asked if you wanted to eat,” he starts, his breath immediately warming the side of your neck. With just those few words, it feels like all the other noise falls away. All you can focus on is the rumble in his voice and how the words feel as if they dance down your spine. “I’m starving,” he adds, and you’re certain your new headspace gave his words a different context than he intended.

He pulls away for your response and all you can muster up is a slow blink and a delayed nod. There’s no cocky smirk at your expression and you wonder if maybe he decided to spare you the embarrassment this time. He promptly turns and you fall in line beside him, letting him guide you around the crowd. His palm finds its way to your lower back as he leads you and just like that, your heart picks up in pace once more.

You’ve only seen the same small movement depicted in movies and you can now safely say that experiencing it is so much more exhilarating. Part of you is frustrated that such an insignificant touch can make you this excited, but Frank’s charm has a tremendous effect on you. Still, you tell yourself it’s the anticipation of his hand being elsewhere on your body that riles you up.

His hand stays put until the two of you reach a booth lining the back wall. There’s a small lamp that bathes the whole table in a warm glow and you and Frank place your things down before sliding into the long seats. As you stare at him from across the table, you watch as his eyes scan the crowd and then the main stage as he focuses on the band. They’re currently playing a cover of a classic rock song and Frank smiles as he nods his head to the music.

“This place is nice,” you raise your voice slightly to be heard over the music. He turns to face you and his smile grows wider.

“Yeah? You like it?” His question is accompanied by your own nod and he continues. “I’m sure there’s fancier ones close to town, but I’ve been coming here for years and they’ve always been good.”

He raises his hand in the air, tilting his head up and leaning to the side as if to catch someone’s attention. You follow his line of sight and look over your shoulder to see a woman with a black apron tied around her waist. She looks slightly past you as a grin covers her face and walks over to your table quicker than you expected.

“Frank?! What are you doing here?” Her voice is already grating and she’s only said a handful of words. Her tone is drawn out, almost flirtatiously, and she stands closer to him than you would’ve liked.

“Just showing her around,” he answers simply. He looks at you and when the waitress does the same, her face falls. You muster up an awkward smile and try to shake off the weird look she gives you. “She’s never been here before, you think we could get some menus?”

“Sure thing,” she mumbles, stepping away only to return a moment later with two long, laminated sheets of paper. She drops them to the table and you spare yourself the trouble of looking at her again.

“She sure seems to like you,” you speak up once she’s left. Frank scoffs before grabbing a menu and shaking his head. “Did you see the way she looked at me? What did I do?” You ask with a frown, wondering if you did something unintentionally.

“She’s probably just pissed cause you’re sitting with me and she’s not,” he answers with a sigh. He flips the paper around and you notice the way his eyes dart around the page. His answer wasn’t very reassuring though, and you still feel the tension in your body. As you scan the small print of the menu in your hands, you can feel his gaze on you. You try to shake the disappointment and to make it less obvious that what she said affected you, but you’re not certain how good of an actress you are.

“Y’know what?” he speaks up after a few seconds. You raise your face to him as he continues, “I know this place a couple of blocks down? Best god damn beer I’ve had.” His hand disappears under the table and a moment later you see his fingers curled around his jacket. “It’s German! You haven’t tried that one before.” He leans across the table before whispering, “You’re gonna hate it.”

His attempts at distracting you work well and you can’t help the laughter escaping you at the final thing he said. Frank’s own crooked smile returns at your reaction and a softness settles into his brown eyes.

“There she is,” he mumbles once he sees your regular self bubble back up to the surface. You bring in a deep breath and choose to shake off any residual awkwardness you felt from before.

“No, no it’s okay. We can stay here.” You finish your sentence and look back towards the music before facing him. His hands are empty now as he continues to stare at you and you feel confident in your choice to stay.

After looking over the endless list of drinks, burgers, and other appetizers, you read a description of a sandwich that makes your stomach rumble to life. You immediately decide on it without a second thought and smile up at Frank, watching him run his finger across the page between two options and looking quite indecisive.

Before long, the ill behaved waitress is back to take down your order. You pick your sandwich, remembering to take off the toppings you aren’t too fond of, add in an order of fries, and your usual favorite drink to top it off. With a hesitant glance up, you see her scribbling down your order on the small notepad in her hand. Her expression is twisted up as if she smelled something foul and you feel that uneasy feeling settling in once more.

“I’ll have the same as my date here,” Frank answers before she can ask about his meal. He gently taps the two menus on the tabletop before handing them over to her. His lips part as his eyes drag over your features and you notice the way they stop for a little longer than they should when they reach your mouth.

To say you were shocked was an understatement. You weren’t sure if he said it just to get under her skin or not but part of you didn’t really care. He said it regardless and that made a smile carve its way onto your face. An annoyed scoff is heard from above and you see a hand come into view to snatch the menus away from Frank. He never looked away from you once.

The moment the food arrives, you’re excitedly grabbing your sandwich and lifting it to your mouth. As your teeth sink into the toasted bread, the flavor hits your tongue and a satisfied moan escapes you. Frank is quick to lift his eyes at the sound, his eyebrows raising as he takes in the scene in front of him. You raise your hand to your mouth and begin to grow bashful at the look on his face.

“Sorry!” You apologize, your voice muffled behind your palm. “It was just really good,” you explain once you swallow your food down.

“Don’t gotta apologize for that, kid,” he replies through his own raspy chuckle. You bite your lip and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear before reaching for the fries in your basket next.

The two of you dig into your identical meals and make some easy conversation in between bites here and there. You’re honestly impressed with how good the sandwich is and you’re glad you picked it out of the infinite number of items on the menu. Frank wasn’t lying when he said he loved this place. You watch him look up from his meal every now and then with a big smile on his face as he moves his head to the beat of the music. His energy was infectious and you found yourself tapping your toes along too. 

“Y’know,” he speaks up after finishing the last bite of his sandwich. At the sound of his voice, you begin to look up to his face, but your eyes latch on to something else. Frank sucks his fingers clean of the salt from his fries, his lips pursing as his cheeks hollow, and you immediately lose any grip you had on controlling your thoughts around him.

“When we ordered I saw your beer on the menu.” You hear his words but they have absolutely no meaning, no way of stringing them together to make a continuous thought as you watch him suck the seasonings from his thumb. You begin to feel a sense of injustice at the fact that those fingers weren’t where you desperately wanted them to be. With a pout, you look back to his gaze and see the confusion clear in his eyes.

“What?” you blurt out, finally remembering he had spoken and that you hadn’t processed anything he had said. He scoffs before shaking his head, his smirk spreading wide across his face before he speaks again.

“Said they have the beer you like here,” he repeats himself, his cocky grin a clear indicator that he saw how you froze up at sight just moments ago.

“I’m actually good tonight,” you say confidently. Reaching for your glass, you take a sip of your drink and hold his gaze as you stare at him from under your eyelashes. He sits back against the cushion of the booth and his eyebrows pull together as he thinks about what you said.

“Yeah?” he asks, squinting his eyes at you.

“Mhm, not letting a few beers stop me from what I wanna do after this,” you explain. You’ve never felt more frustrated than when he stopped you from kissing on his neck. You understood why he did it, and are actually very thankful he didn’t want it to go further, but the disappointment coursed through you all the same.

“Hmm? And what exactly is that?” he questions as the band finishes up the song they had been playing. Your eyes follow the noise as the crowd erupts into whistles and claps, applauding the musicians. When you finally look back over, Frank’s in the same position. It’s like he never looked away from you—hell, you’re not sure if he even blinked.

You don’t answer him though and make up your mind to keep him on the edge of his seat. Instead, you smile sweetly before picking up a fry from your basket and popping it past your lips. 

He gives you a knowing look, but doesn’t pry. Perhaps he was looking forward to the surprise of it all. You only hope you can remain as confident as you feel now so you can properly act out your plan. Before long, he swallows down his last french fry and Frank speaks up with a question.

“You wanna go dance?” Your whole body freezes at the mere thought of attempting to dance, not to mention the added nerves of doing it in a crowded room with Frank Castle standing witness. But as you look out onto the dance floor full of moving bodies, you realize most of them are probably far too intoxicated to really pay attention to you. Deciding to push past the initial fear, and wanting to be fully present with him and have fun, you nod and scoot out of the booth.

Frank stands in front of you and his hand soon comes into view of your eyeline. You place your hand in his and feel his fingers curl around your palm as you brace your weight on him and rise to your feet. You stand on your toes and motion for him to come closer so you can speak into his ear.

“Just so you know, I’m a terrible dancer,” you say after he’s tilted his head towards you.

“What part of me screams that I’m a good one?” he asks, and you chuckle at his joke. He smiles down at your laughter and nods his head behind him, letting you know he’s going to the dancefloor.

Frank keeps a hold of your hand as he leads you through the crowd. His broad body splits the sea of bodies as he walks and you follow close enough behind him to squeeze past them as well. There’s blue hues from the dim lights that shine over the people, but other than that you can’t see much beside their moving feet. He must’ve gotten to a clearing where there’s not as many people bumping into one another, because he stops walking and turns to you.

You’re sort of frozen still for a moment as the reality of it is beginning to creep in. But then Frank starts to shimmy his shoulders and you can’t help but break into a wide grin. Just like that, you’re thawed. The awkwardness you felt is starting to leave you as you begin to loosen up in front of him.

The band plays a fun, upbeat song that you don’t recognize, but he seems to be making the moves up as he goes along. You follow his direction, copying him but still keep some distance, trying to slowly shake off those nerves that are still lingering around. Suddenly, Frank does a move that you can’t even begin to describe with words alone and you burst into laughter as you watch him. Holding your stomach, you shake your head at him and he begins to laugh too. 

The band then retires from the stage, saying their farewells as the crowd applauds and whistles. Frank claps along with the rest of them and you cup your hands around your mouth to give a small cheer. You really enjoyed their set and wouldn’t mind coming back here again to watch them play once more.

Once the stage is clear, music begins to play over the speakers and Frank’s face lights up. His excitement is clear after just the first few notes.

“God, this takes me back,” his wide grin causes his eyes to squint up. You smile up at him, happy at his enjoyment, but you can’t help your head from tilting to the side confusedly.

“You haven’t heard this before?” he asks incredulously and you shake your head. “It’s literally my favorite song, how do you not know this?”

“When did it come out?” you ask, and watch him look up as he starts to think.

“Must’ve been… right after graduation, I think?” He does the math for a moment longer before answering with the year it was released. The answer has you fighting back a giggle as you stare at him awkwardly.

“Frank, I wasn’t born until two years later,” you answer honestly, and the look on his face is priceless.

“Jesus Christ…” he replies, dragging his hand down his face. You begin to worry now, wondering if you shouldn’t have brought up that point. He must’ve caught a glance at your anxious frown because he’s quick to explain himself.

“You’re fine just… my back hurt when you said that.” His hand comes to the back of his neck to emphasize his point and your smile finds its way back to your lips.

Despite the initial embarrassment you ran into after being reminded again of the gap in age between you and Frank, you found yourself really enjoying the song. He was honest when he said it was one of his favorites. You’ve never seen him this lively before and you love being able to soak up every minute of it. He’s so animated as he dances, holding you close to him with his hand secured at your back. The lines to the song fall past his lips like muscle memory as his forehead presses to yours.

You can’t stand being this close to him. Your whole body feels like it’s been shot with a current of electricity and you’re desperately wanting him to stop singing and put his mouth to yours. He might have a sixth sense—or simply just picked up on the timing—because his lips are on yours a second later. He kisses you deeply, his tongue brushing your lower lip for a moment before you eagerly let him in. Your head tilts to the side as you kiss him back and your arm wraps around his wide shoulders to ensure you’ll have your fill.

All too soon he’s breaking the kiss and you immediately suck your bottom lip behind your teeth to savor the feeling of him. He suddenly lifts his arm into the air and cues you to spin. You twirl under his hand with a huge grin and then he yanks you in for the finish, timing it so that your back is to his chest when you land against him. His same palm immediately finds your hip and tightens to keep you flush to him. His opposite hand travels down the length of your torso, his index finger tracing your side as he moves.

He begins to whisper the lyrics against your ear and you can’t bring yourself to focus on their meaning. He’s all over you and it’s making you feel dizzy, as if you’re drunk on his scent alone. Each pass of his finger along your ribs alights a fire at your side and you try to keep up as he begins rocking you from side to side to the rhythm of the song. His breath warms the entire side of your face and neck with each word he whispers. You fall under his spell and roll your head to the side at the feeling of his warmth all over.

When the song starts to fade and a new one begins overlapping it, you’re left with a bittersweet feeling; part of you never wanted to leave that moment and would gladly listen to that song on loop for the rest of your life, but the other half of you was almost frightened at how easily you turned to putty in his hands. You felt the need to have a better grasp on yourself, especially if you wanted to stay courageous for what you had planned for tonight.

The mix of two songs smoothen down into one and you instantly recognize the slow, sexy bassline that’s pumping through the speakers overhead. You’re not sure what came over you. Perhaps you wanted to prove to someone that you’re not that same timid, little girl. Whatever it was that coursed through your veins, you’re thankful that it gave you the strength to grab his large palm and put it back into place at your hip. You use the extra support to push your ass back into him, making sure to press hard enough until you feel the bulge in his jeans.

Frank doesn’t show any reaction except for his fingers tightening into your skin as if you were a lifeline. You smile as you continue to grind into him, your hips following the similar movements he taught you just a few days prior. Facing away from him gives you the extra boost of confidence needed to perform this act, but you’d be lying if you said you wouldn’t kill to see the look on his face right now.

With each push of your ass against the denim fabric, you feel the heat of his bulge so close to where your own warmth had started to pool. This felt good and you felt pride surging through your chest once you realized exactly what you were doing.

And then his arm crosses your chest and pulls you flat against him once more. His forearm is pressed against your collarbones and you feel your breath hitch at the hold he has you in. With a shaky inhale, you swallow down the lump in your throat and wait for him to speak.

“Look at you, sweetheart,” the tip of his nose brushes the curve of your ear and you try your damndest to not let your body double over. “Someone’s getting confident, huh?” His arm begins to slowly drop from across your chest, and instead reaches your lower stomach. From there, he applies pressure until you’re as close as you could be to him.

“You feel that? Hmm?” There’s an undeniable hardness under the thick layers of fabric. It doesn't feel as big as the last time he got turned on from you, but it’s still noticeable. “That’s all you,” he finishes with a lower tone of voice before taking half a step back and leaving you to sit with his words.

It takes you a moment to wrap your head around this entire situation. It’s abundantly clear that the mood has changed from light laughter and awful dance moves to something more sultry. You can feel the warmth slowly spreading between your legs and it leaves you with a buzz that makes you feel like your movements are slowed. When you turn around to finally face him, he’s already staring down at you expectedly.

“Why don’t we get outta here?” he asks, deep voice blending in with the booming bass. You nod at him and it feels like you’re moving in molasses. The dull, blue light from above catches his face for a moment. There’s something deeper to his unreadable expression; his jaw is clenched as if he’s trying to hold something back.

Once the two of you make it back to the table, Frank reaches into his back pocket for his wallet. He thumbs through the notes before tossing a few bills onto the table. He reaches into the booth seat for his jacket and shakes it out before draping it over your shoulders.

“Thank you,” you mumble in a quiet voice.

“Don’t gotta thank me for that, sweetheart,” he shakes his head, insisting that your gratitude isn’t needed. He begins to walk towards the door with his hand in its designated spot at your lower back to help guide you once again. The chill of the night air hits you the second you step out of the building and you find yourself curling his jacket snugger around your body. His scent is stuck to the collar and it helps lessen your shivering from the cold breeze.

He walks you to your side of the van and opens the door for you to climb in. Even after he gets in and begins driving down the same winding roads, there’s not much conversation between the two of you. The tension in the car is thick and incredibly palpable. You’re indecisive about whether to break the silence or leave it untouched so as to not make it worse.

Eventually Frank pulls into his parking spot that faces the front door of his apartment. After putting the van in park and walking around to open your door once more, you take his hand and carefully step down. He unlocks the door and gets you inside quickly, trying to shield you from the chilly air. Once he flicks the lights on, you’re greeted by the familiar sight of his living room and feel that desire to touch him creep back in. Your name falls from his lips and you turn your head at the sound.

“I’m sorry if I went too far back there. I shouldn’t have—,” he begins to apologize, but you’re quick to interrupt by pressing your lips to his. A surprised grunt comes from him and you smirk into the kiss, pleased to have caught him off guard. He wastes no time in wrapping his arms around you and begins leading you towards the couch. When you feel the back of your knees hit the curve of the cushion, you angle yourself in front of Frank and push him into the sofa below.

He looks up at you with his lips parted and his chest is noticeably bringing in deeper breaths each time he inhales. His usually soft, brown eyes have a darkened glint to them and you’re certain you’ve never seen this emotion on him before. Your pulse is racing through your own body and you swiftly straddle him with your knees on either side of his hips.

His impatient fingers grab hold of you in a way no one ever has before. The action causes a surprised gasp to fall past your lips, but it’s swallowed down by Frank who can’t seem to keep his mouth off of yours. The light stubble decorating his jaw scratches at your skin and the rough feeling does nothing but spur you on further. You begin to roll your hips into his as you fall into a familiar pattern and he uses his hold to help guide you into moving faster.

His movements are rushed and needy and it makes you feel reassured that he wants this—he wants you. That little boost to your ego has your hands tracing down his body, your palms rubbing down his strong chest, before finally reaching his belt. Your fingers search blindly for the leather and the sound of the buckle clinking sounds out in between the wet noises of your kisses.

“Woah, easy,” Frank breaks the kiss the second the sound reaches his ears. “Let’s just, uh…” he trails off and you feel his fingers gently prying yours away. “Let’s take it slow, alright?” His tone is so soft and the concern is written clearly across his features.

“Frank, please,” you try to reason with him. “I didn’t even drink tonight! And I just… last time I was all worked up and I really want to do this.” You finish with a pout as you glance up at him with pleading eyes. He swallows hard as he stares at you for a moment, probably battling something internally.

“What do you wanna do?” he asks slowly, trying to make his words clear. The question is so simple but admitting it to him makes you feel small again.

“I… I want to touch you,” you mumble, silently hoping he doesn’t ask you to be more explicit than that.

“You sure you want this?” His eyes never leave yours as he confirms your consent.

“I really do,” you reply, bringing your hand up and cupping his cheek. You brush your thumb over his skin and watch as he begins to shut his eyes and breathe deeply. “Please?”

You’re not sure if it’s the quiet plea, his own craving that’s swaying his decision, or some combination of the two, but he slowly uncurls his fingers from your wrist. You beam brightly at him and whisper a thanks as you peck him on the cheek.

“You’re still gonna have to walk me through it, Frank,” you say through a small chuckle.

He nods with an equally quiet, “I know.”

From there, he doesn’t try to deter your movements any longer. He lets you continue as you slide his belt past the metal buckle. You look up at him for reassurance and he nods his head with a smile. He takes your hand in his and pulls it to his bulge, letting you feel it properly for the first time. Excitement races through you and settles in your lower stomach as you watch your hand touch him over the denim.

“Can I take your jeans off?” Your question is met with another nod as he lets go of you. Slipping the button past the slit, you then lower the zipper past the teeth and the sound feels so loud in the otherwise silent room. You move to sit beside him and Frank helps you tug his pants down, raising his hips to lower them some more until they fall past his knees. He’s wearing a pair of dark grey boxer briefs and your eyes linger far too long on how they hug his thighs.

The thick outline stretching the fabric is enough to recenter your attention though. You start to feel the nerves coming back once you register just how big he is as he lies against his hip. You always had a feeling, given the sheer size of the man, but seeing it is a whole other experience. Thankfully, Frank doesn’t rush you as he lets you take this all in. You hesitantly move your hand over the length of him, brushing your fingers over the defined line underneath the head of his cock.

The next thing you reach for is the waistband of his boxers. You curl your fingers over the edge and tug them down, watching as more and more of his happy trail becomes exposed. He once again helps you pull them past his legs and now that he’s bare in front of you, you can’t help your eyes from widening. You had thought the bulge was big, but it was misleading; Frank is actually much larger than you had anticipated.

“What? You’ve never seen—?” He starts but you’re quick to cut him off.

“I have. I’ve seen, like, porn before but…” you find your voice leaving you as you stare between his legs. “It’s just bigger in person.” His chuckle sounds out and you raise your head to the noise only to be met by an amused smirk at your confession.

“S’not just cause it’s in person, kid,” he laughs through his words and you roll your eyes at his cockiness. You like that you can still crack jokes during a time like this and you find yourself thankful that you get to have Frank as your first introduction to sex. Feeling more relaxed, you reach forward and gently curl your fingers around his thick base.

“You can hold it tighter than that,” he speaks up after a second.

“I know,” you respond, tightening your hold on him a little more. He snorts lightly at the, apparently, subtle increase in pressure and you feel his larger hand curling around your own. His long fingers squeeze over yours, adjusting your grip on his length as he begins to move your hand up and down. He’s warm and heavy in your hand, two things you hadn’t given much thought of before now. Frank lifts your hand once more and a satisfied sigh leaves him.

The sound stirs something in your stomach and you try to swallow down your own growing arousal at the noise he’s making. He loosens his hold on you and you watch as his hands find the hem of his shirt before bunching it up and exposing the lower half of his stomach. There’s so much to look at and it’s pulling your attention in too many ways. You try to focus on him in your hand though and begin speeding up your movements.

“You can spit on it,” he speaks up after a few seconds. You turn to face him and feel your eyebrows pull together at his words.

“Like just… spit on it?” The confusion is more than likely obvious in your tone but you want to ensure that you don’t embarrass yourself with him. Not now when you’ve made it this far.

“Yeah, go for it,” he encourages gently. With one last glance at him, you lean forward and lower your head over his length. You purse your lips and part them as you let the split slowly drip until it’s sliding over his head. You watch as it runs down past the tip and Frank clears his throat.

“Shit, yeah that…” he trails off as he raises his hips slightly. “That works too.” You smile at his words and wonder if his movement was an instinctual reaction to the warmth running along the smooth skin of his cock.

With the help of the extra slick added to his length, you begin to work your hand faster on him. You know from what you’ve heard that the tip is more sensitive, so you raise your hand right underneath his head and tighten your grip. A grunt immediately falls from him and you impulsively let go of him. You face him with a worried expression and watch as he brings in a deep breath before swallowing thickly.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. Just felt real damn good.” The praise in his words immediately rushes to your heart and you feel yourself swell with pride. You can’t believe you made him feel that good, but now you’re determined to see what other sounds you can pull from his pretty lips. As you focus your attention back to his cock, you see a few beads of precum beginning to bubble up at his swollen tip. You rub your thumb in circles over the slit, spreading around the proof of his pleasure, and you feel him twitch in your hold.

“Shiiiiiit,” the drawn out curse sounds raspy and you don’t stop your movements as you check once again to see his reaction. Frank’s head is tilted back slightly against the couch cushion, his mouth is parted, and his eyes are scrunched up slightly. You try your hardest to memorize this version of him. You wish you could ingrain this memory so you’ll never forget how good he looks when he’s succumbing to his pleasure.

Twisting your hand as you move it over his length, you notice the way his adam's apple bobs as he swallows down presumably another groan. You can’t resist the urge to feel even more of him, and press your lips against his neck. Lazy kisses are littered across his skin while you work your hand faster, intermittently tightening your hold on his thickness. His throat tightens as he feels the wet marks of your affection, and the next thing you feel is his fingers tangling in your hair. He pulls gently as he tugs your head up to his and he kisses down your surprised gasp, his tongue slipping into your mouth.

You’re having trouble keeping up with his movements and you realize this must be what it’s like to be kissed breathlessly. Any moment you get, you’re greedily gulping down air before he continues his ravenous attack on your lips. You never slow the speed of your hand and press yourself against his side, trying to feel more of him to satiate your need. Frank tries to break the kiss but you push against him harder, not wanting to let go for a second. But he tries again, grabbing your wrist gently and you immediately pull away with a frown.

“What did I do?” you ask in a worried tone. He’s quick to lock his eyes with yours and speaks clearly.

“You’re okay. You’re doing so good, sweetheart,” he starts, and then nods down towards his lap. “I’m almost there, kid. Just wanted to warn you before it happens.” And just like that, a wide grin splits across your face. I’m making him feel that good?!

“I really wanna make you come, Frank,” you tell him honestly and you notice his cock twitch slightly as he registers your words.

“You keep talking like that and you will,” he grumbles in a low voice. His tone almost seems as if it was meant as a warning, but all it does is add to the fire in the pit of your stomach. You’re quick to reach for him again and fall back into the rhythm you established just seconds ago. With each pass of your hand you feel the veins protruding slightly through his skin and make sure to add slightly more pressure to the ring underneath his tip—he seemed to like that in particular.

“Just like that—fuck, attagirl,” he breathes through gritted teeth while he stares down at your smaller fingers wrapped snugly around him. The praise courses through you and you hide your face in his neck. You place sloppy kisses under his jaw and listen as more grunts start to fall from his parted lips. They slowly twist into a new sound and it takes you a second to realize it’s your name that’s coming out in a twisted groan. You glance down and watch as he raises his hips for a moment to chase after the feeling of you, his orgasm following soon after.

One long moan falls from him as warmth spills over your hands. You make sure not to miss a single second and don’t dare slow down or pull away. You want Frank to feel as good as possible and so you’ll drag this out for as long as you can. White begins to coat his head and the rest of his length as you continue moving over him. It isn’t until he reaches for your wrist that you take notice of the way his thigh is tense and you let go to give him some relief.

“T…That’s enough,” he pants as he speaks through uneven breathing. You mumble an apology as you snuggle into his side again, leaving the remainder of your kisses on his collarbone. His hand rubs at your back while he regains his breath and you feel him press his lips to your forehead. 

“Jesus Christ,” he whispers, and you follow his gaze to the mess in his lap. His cock lies on his hip, all spent and giving a weak twitch once or twice. You don’t even try to hide the smile that grows on your face at the sight.

“Oh, you proud of yourself, huh?” he asks through a fit of chuckles. “You should be,” he holds you to his side again. “Did so fuckin’ good.” You feel another long kiss to the side of your head. Pride isn’t even a strong enough word to describe how you feel at this moment.

“Thank you, Frank,” you smile up at him.

“Thank me? Nah, you did all that,” he brushes it off just like last time. “Thank you for making me feel good, kid. You were absolutely perfect.” The warmth spreading to your cheeks makes you hide your face in his chest again. You weren’t really sure how a scene like this was supposed to normally end, but Frank doesn’t say anything more. He keeps you close in his arms and you can still hear his pulse attempting to slow in his chest. For now, you don’t want to question what comes next; for once, you’re comfortable exactly where you are.

Taglist: @chellestrash @avengerstower-houseplant @musicals-and-mermaids @castle-of-ruin @justalittlepickle @boo8008 @doublevirgogirl @xxdrixx @yaminax @nabiiturner @imwaytoolazyforthis @vechkinfan @himesuedi @0-goblin-0 @soleilcastle @innebulae @punishersmainchick @eddiemunsonsbelover @tea-drinking-nerd

[nolita-fairytale]

burn your life down | chef luca x fem!reader | chapter eight

summary: you and luca pick up where you left off a week ago.

warnings: fluff, smut (18+ only), literally just p*rn FOR the plot. big note on consent: there is protected (then sort of) unprotected sex in this chapter. the biggest point i'd like to make here is that both characters consent to both kinds and have a very open and honest conversation about it which, if you take away anything from this chapter, it's PLEASE HAVE HONEST CONVERSATIONS WITH THE PEOPLE YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH FOR EVERYONE'S SAFETY. ok rant over.

word count: 4.9k

listen to: the official 'burn your life down' playlist

a/n: another busy week ahead of me so I wanted to get this out here ASAP, but most likely won't be able to get the following chapter out for a bit. obviously, we don't know what happens w/ marcus' mom, but in this world, she doesn't die opening night of The Bear.

on another note: you guys are seriously the best and leave the sweetest and most excited comments/reblogs. i seriously love it when you guys scream at me in gifs/memes/all caps. let me know if you'd like to be added or removed from the taglist.

part seven | masterlist | part nine

“Yeah uh, everything’s been goin’ good. I think Carm’s still trying to deal with everything that happened since opening – I don’t know if you heard but – but… it’s been good,” Marcus says over his FaceTime call with his mentor. 

“No, I hadn’t. Eh, haven’t talked to him much since before you visited,” Luca answers, hesitant to ask about what happened during that first night. 

“Got locked in the fridge and kinda lost it but… he’s doin’ okay,” Marcus explains, summing up the events of The Bear’s friends and family night. 

“How are you doing? How’s your mum?” Luca asks, changing the subject from Carmen to his mentee. 

He’s had more contact with Marcus – knows more of what’s going on in Marcus’ life than Carmen’s for a bit now – and Luca wants to make sure he’s being a good friend to him, considering he’d heard about Marcus’ mom’s emergency the night of The Bear’s friends and family night. 

“She’s hangin’ on but… it’s not lookin’ great. It’s hard, man. I’m… doin’ the best I can,” Marcus admits, solemnly. 

“I can only imagine,” Luca empathizes, because he can’t bear the thought of losing his own mum. 

“But uh… anyways, what’s up? What’s new with you?” Marcus asks, his voice much more energetic from the prospect of changing the subject. 

“You sure you want to hear about me?” Luca hesitates cautiously. 

“Yeah, man,” Marcus agrees. Luca can hear something so sure in his voice, as if Marcus is in dire need of a distraction – to talk about anything but his sick mom. “Shit. I’d love to hear about someone else’s drama for once,”

Luca chuckles softly, his voice light as he replies, “No drama on my end. Though. Ehm… I met a girl. I actually kinda have you to thank for it, mate.” 

“What do you mean?” Marcus questions. 

“Well. All that talk about inspiration…” Luca says, thinking about how what he’s just makes sense. 

“... you know, about being open to things outside the kitchen…. After you left, it made me realize that it’d be a while since I’d taken my own advice. Got stuck on a menu, went out for inspiration, and, well you know what they say: the rest is history.”

He knows it’s not as simple as that, but it seems like Marcus needs a little good news right now. 

“Oh shit! How’s that going?” Marcus asks, his tone much lighter now. 

“I’m positively chuffed, mate,” Luca chuckles, unable to hide the i’m-very-much-enamored smile that spreads across his face.

“The fuck does that even mean, man?” Marcus teases with a laugh at the oh-so-posh-sounding expression. 

Luca laughs again before explaining, “It means I'm pretty damn smitten.” 

“Shit,” Marcus sighs. 

He can see it all over his face as he continues to see his mentor. 

“You’re a goner, man.”

-------------------------------

Luca walks you home this Saturday evening after his regular dinner date at your restaurant. While you had a steady flow of business tonight, Mathilde and the rest of your kitchen staff made it a point to rally so that you could join him for a bit. It’s been a week since your unplanned sleepover with Luca (and your pleasantly surprising sexy morning after), and you haven’t stopped thinking about it. 

Haven’t stopped thinking about him:

The way he called you ‘love.’ The way he watched you fall apart with the most pleased look on his face. The way his fingers felt inside of you. 

“Luca,” you begin. 

The two of you stand across from one another, at a crossroads. The night could end here. You could say your goodbyes, give him a goodnight kiss, and go your separate ways, but that’s far from the option you’d prefer.

“Yes, love?” he asks you, as if he’s waiting for you to ask first.

There it is again. 

Love. 

Your eyes flicker from the cobblestone streets then back up to him as you the words fall out of your mouth:

“Do you… wanna come up?” 

Something flashes across Luca’s face as he opens mouth to say something, pausing for a moment before answering, as if it’s an agreement to what you’re really asking, an ever-so confident,

“Yes.” 

You smile, take a breath, then grab his hand as you turn towards the door to your building. As Luca follows you, the only sound between the two of you are your footsteps as you make your way up the stairs. The tension between you is thick, the anticipation of what happens next palpable, that takes shape as a pregnant silence. Luca is more-than-patient as you unlock your door, welcoming him into your home once again, before locking your front door behind you. He’s busy removing his shoes as you giggle, taking yours off as well. 

Once both of you are barefoot, you reach for him, pulling him towards you so that he towers over you, your back pressed against the front door once again. 

“This feels… eerily familiar,” Luca jokes softly, so close to kissing you that it hurts. 

“Yeah,” you agree, under your breath. This is exactly where he had you a week ago, before you both decided not to do the thing you were about to do. “Think you might wanna… pick up where we left off? Now that neither of us are plastered?”

Luca waits a beat, leaning in and ghosting his lips over yours, causing you to gasp in response to his teasing. 

“Do you?” he asks, his voice steady.

He wants to know that you’re sure. Wants to know that you want this as much as him. That you haven’t stopped thinking about the other day when he watched you fall apart on his fingers and how it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. 

“Yes,” you answer, your voice unwavering. 

He swears under his breath before his mouth is on yours, kissing you so deeply that your head spins. You make a mental note to tell him later how absolutely perfect his lips are – how deliciously plump they are, how they feel perfect against yours, how talented they are. You kiss him back, allowing him to steal the air from your lungs as he does it, crowding you up against your front door. 

Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling him closer to you. You push your body against his, surprised at how steady his hands are, while yours feel so desperate, so frenzied, when he reaches for you. 

His hands are all over you, leaving confident, strong touches all over your body: pulling you in closer to him by your hips, stroking up and down your back, sliding underneath the hem of your shirt like he’s already done this with you a thousand times before. With his hands already underneath your shirt, exploring new territory, and his mouth leaving a trail of wet kisses down your neck, his name leaves your lips like something between a sigh and a moan. 

He hums in response, pulling back for a moment. Your heart skips as a beath, as blue eyes lock with yours in a heated, lust-filled standoff. 

“Come with me,” you whisper, causing Luca to move aside, letting you lead him towards your bedroom. 

On the way there, you flip a hallway light on so that you can at least see where you’re going. You feel his fingers tangle with yours as he grabs your hand, his heart pounding in his chest. As soon as you reach your bedroom, you sit him down on your neatly-made bed, before turning on a small, soft, golden lamp that feels like candlelight. 

It’s just enough – more of a nightlight than a lamp, really.

You approach him without a word, and Luca marvels at you. You’re a sight for sore eyes: your hair messy from the heated makeout against your front door, your lips kiss-swollen from the fact that he can barely keep his hands, let alone his mouth off of you, your pupils blow wide with desire for him and only him. You pull your shirt over your head as you climb on to his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck as you press a searing kiss to his lips. 

“My god,” he murmurs, his hands coming up to meet the newly exposed skin. You settle into his lap, pressing your hips against his, arching your back into him in response to each touch. “You are so incredibly beautiful.”

You giggle before thanking him.

“Yeah, and I know that you know you’re hot,” you tease him in between kisses, because the man must know what he looks like, right? Luca mutters something about how he wasn’t trying to solicit a compliment from you as he lays back on your bed, taking you with him.

His hands hungrily grab at exposed flesh: the sides of your back, your breasts, the straps of your bra, just to pull them down enough to think he’s going to take it off. Impatiently, you grind your hips against where a tent in his pants has begun to form, earning a moan from his lips as he bucks his hips up to meet your clothed core. 

“We should um-,” you start, already so turned on by the way Luca’s body moves against yours that you think you should bring this up sooner rather than later. “Things we should talk about….”

“Yes, my love?” Luca asks, grinding against you again. 

You moan in response, throwing your head back as you giggle, knowing that he’s teasing you – testing your patience. 

You settle down, just for a moment, both hands going to his well-toned chest. Luca’s hands still around your hips as you say:

“I have condoms. In my nightstand. And I’m also on the pill. I… just got back on it.” 

Just got back on it when you started seeing him – you know, just in case this became a thing. 

“I haven’t been tested since my yearly physical which was… almost a year ago… but I also haven’t exactly been having sex so,” you add, your eyes flickering away for just a moment before returning to Luca’s very blue ones. 

“That’s very sexy,” he smiles up at you, his hands softly stroking your hips. 

“What?” you ask with a giggle, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you shoot him a quizzical look. 

“This… very direct communication,” he replies with a smirk, grinding his hips back up into yours again. 

“Luca!” you squeal in response, catching yourself against him so that you don’t lose your balance. 

He grins before answering, “My last test was three months ago at my yearly physical. Clean bill of health.” He pauses before saying the next thing. 

“And I’m not seeing anyone else.”

You nod, leaning down to kiss him in understanding, “Okay.”

“Okay,” he replies, bringing you down once more for another passionate makeout. 

Luca is right. It’s an even bigger turn on, the open communication, and now that you’ve gotten that conversation out of the way, you’re ready to dive in head first to exactly where you hope this is going. Getting undressed is a sexy, dreamy blur. You’re practically tearing Luca’s shirt over his head, unable to hide the fact that your jaw is near-on the floor as you take it in the hard planes of his abdomen. He expertly removes your bra, and before you know it, he’s gotten you onto your back, and you’re kicking your pants off to the bottom of the bed. 

Luca pins both of your hands to the bed overhead with one of his hands – his fingers laced with some of yours as he holds them in place – while his other hand once again makes its way between your legs. You gasp in anticipation, unable to stop the confession that comes out of your mouth. 

“I haven’t stopped thinking about that. About you. All week,” you whisper, eager to have him touch you again. 

“That so?” Luca asks cockily, in between kisses. 

“Yes,” you gasp, squirming underneath your touch as two his fingers dance over your clothed core. 

From the wetness pooling between your legs up to your clit, the way he touches you sets off sparks all over your body. You pant, unable to think straight as Luca pulls your pantied aside, his fingertips meeting your wetness immediately. He moans in response to this discovery, his forehead pressed against yours, and you cry out when he finally gives you what you’ve been begging for, as he slips a finger into you. 

“Luca,” you sigh, like you’ve gotten the only thing that could remedy your restlessness as of late. 

Luca kisses you again, his tongue slipping into your mouth for a millionth time tonight as he begins sliding his finger in and out of you. 

“You’re so wet, love,” he coos, teasingly, into your mouth. “It’s too easy. The way my fingers slide in and out of you.” He pushes another finger into you, beginning to stretch you again at a deliciously slow pace. “You want me this much?”

And all you can do is moan, arch your back in response to the pleasure he brings you, his hand keeping both of yours above your head while he has you at his mercy. 

“So good,” you cry, as you breathe heavily. “So good. It feels-. Fuck.” 

He chuckles cruelly, breaking the kiss between you as he pulls his fingers from you. You whimper in response, impatiently, greedily. The man has you under a sexual spell and you could care less about anything else right now. 

“I already know how you feel about my fingers. Think I should give you my mouth too, hm?” he rasps, his question anything but rhetorical. 

Luca releases your hands that he’s pinned to the mattress, beginning to kiss down your jaw, your neck, your bare torso, pausing to take each of your nipples into his mouth, his tongue flickering across them like it’s a goddamn preview. 

“I need to hear you say it,” he commands, his voice quiet yet dominant. Luca pauses, his journey south, leaving hot, open mouthed kisses across your belly as he looks up at you with piercing blue eyes. 

“D’you want my mouth? Will you let me taste you?” 

“Please,” you’re too quick, too eager to respond when you’re looking down at him, looking down at the sight before you. 

Without hesitation, Luca tears your panties down your legs, impatiently tossing them behind him. He begins kissing the inside of your right thigh, alternating between soft kisses, and gentle love bites that have you squealing in delight. You let out soft moans in anticipation, sure that whatever happens next will bring you to an early grave. 

A hiss in pleasure escapes your lips as you feel the heat of his breath fan over you, but before your brain can even catch up, Luca’s licking a broad stripe up your core, parting you open for him and only him. 

You cry out, your head thrown back as he buries his face between your legs, tracing fierce abstract shapes over your clit. He moans against you, the vibrations too much as you surrender to him. He alternated between sucking and licking, and it’s not till he’s pushing two fingers back into you that your hands are grasping at the sheets, grabbing at the back of his head as your body writhes in pleasure. 

You can feel it, that spark so deep in your belly, the coil that winds itself so tightly that the only thing it can do to relieve any tension is to snap. 

“Luca. I’m gonna cum,” you beg him, a desperate whine in your voice. “Please don’t stop.” 

He doesn’t. It’s as if he couldn’t bear the thought of it – like he could never be cruel enough to deny you what you’re asking for when your voice sounds so sweet, so desperate, so on fire for him.

Using his fingers and his mouth in tandem, he’s relentless in bringing you to your climax, so determined to keep his name on your lips with every gasp, moan, and exhale.

And god, does he love the way it sounds: when you’re moaning it, when you’re begging him not to stop, when you make it sound like a symphony – like he’s just created a goddamn masterpiece. 

He’s left you breathless, and all you can do is breathe, allowing your brain to catch up with the pleasure your body has just experienced. Luca makes his way back up to you before pressing a searing kiss to your lips. You can taste yourself on his lips, and you have no intention of stopping now. 

You can feel the weight of him as he folds his body over yours. Curious hands begin to move as you become more and more interested in exploring Luca’s body. His muscles flex underneath your fingertips as a reminder of the sheer strength of the man above you. Luca groans as you cup him over his pants, before you begin to undo his pants.

“Do you… want to grab a condom?” he asks softly. 

You pause, your hands to meet his gaze with your own. 

“Uh.. yeah,” you reply. You had every intention of returning the favor, but perhaps that’s something you’ll save for tomorrow. “Let me just um….” 

You sit up, and Luca pulls back, kneeling on the bed as he finishes the job, undoing the button on his pants as you open your nightstand to grab a condom. You place the condom down on the bed next to you, before laying down, your legs spread enough so that Luca can settle between them as you watch him slide his pants and briefs down over his erection. 

Holy. Shit. 

The man’s an adonis. 

And…

Well, you know you shouldn’t be surprised. 

He’s 6’ 3” for godssake. 

But as you see his cock standing tall, hard, precum leaking from the tip, you’re glad you’ve had quite the night of foreplay so far, especially since it’s been a while since you’ve taken a lover. Instead of hesitating, you sit up just for a moment so that you can pull him over you, pulling Luca down to you for a kiss. He’s quick to respond, using one tatted hand to cradle the back of your head, deepening the kiss as he lays over you once again. 

Your right hand makes it way between you, beginning to stroke him, earning a hiss of pleasure from Luca as you wrap your hand around his thick length. He bucks into your hand and you stroke up and down his erection a few times before guiding him towards you, allowing him to use your slick as lubricant as the two of you grind against each. 

You know you should do the responsible thing, but you can’t help wondering what it would feel like too. But there’s time for that. Another time for that… 

As if he’s read your mind, Luca grabs the condom next to you, before sitting up. He carefully rips open the foil packet before tossing it somewhere on the floor, giving both hands the freedom to slide the latex over his hard on. And then he’s back on you, folding his body over yours as you make room for him between your legs, pressing the gentlest kiss to your lips. 

“You sure you want to do this?” he asks, and you think you’ll melt with how damn considerate he is. 

“Yes, baby,” you whisper back, it being the first time you’ve called him that. “Yes.” 

With your ‘yes’ Luca reaches down, pressing his thick tip against your opening, then begins to push in. You both gasp at the contact as he holds your gaze, and you feel the slightest pinch as he stretches you open. Luca caresses the side of your face, watching you for any sign, any kind of reaction that you’d want to stop. He keeps his eyes on you, pushing deeper, and then deeper, till he bottoms out.

Leaning his forehead against yours as he pauses, he’s got to focus on not cumming right then and there. 

“Fuck. You feel so fucking good,” he exhales, letting the way you feel take over him. You’re all warm, wet, pulsing heat and it feels too fucking good. 

You give yourself a moment to adjust to his size, before beginning to give him a few experimental movements, grinding your hips where the two of you are connected. Without having to say a word, Luca understands, dragging his hard length out of you at an unbearably slow pace, before pushing back into you, eliciting moans from the both of you this time. 

“Do that again,” you murmur, your eyes fluttering close and you focus on the delicious drag of his cock. 

He does it again, this time thrusting a little bit harder into you, causing you to moan a little louder this time. His mouth is back on yours as he begins to set a rhythm, thrusting in and out of you while you meet his hips with yours, rocking against him at a pace that matches. It’s as if Luca’s begun to map out your body, wanting to memorize every little thing that makes you tick, that makes you scream, causes you to grasp at any grabbable surface – the sheets, his hair, his back. 

His mouth is back on yours, swallowing your moans as he continues to fuck you. You’ve settled into a rhythm that feels just right – something that you can get completely lost in. It could be minutes, hours, days that you’ve been here, chasing mutual pleasure, wrapped up in each other’s arms like you need it to breathe. The way he moves against you is strong, yet gentle as Luca makes love to you, whispering the filthiest things into your mouth, into your ears, the soft canvas of your skin, as if he’s engraving them in stone.

You take me so well. So fucking pretty like this. My beautiful girl. 

“Luca,” you gasp, as he gives you a particularly euphoric thrust. 

“Hm?” he hums in response. 

“Let me ride you,” you request, your eyelids heavy as he stays close to you. 

“Yeah?” he asks you, one expressive eyebrow raising up. 

“Yeah,” you nod. 

Luca kisses you deeply before pausing, pulling out of you and rolling over onto his back. He thinks he’s died and gone to heaven as he watches you climb on top of him, your disheveled sex hair and desire to fuck him seem to awaken something primal in him. As you hover over him, your knees framing his hips, you line yourself up with him before taking him once again. 

Luca groans, letting his hands trace gentle patterns up and down your body – his hands smooth over your ass and caress your breasts, as calloused fingertips drag across your stomach, your shoulders, your ribcage – as if he's writing a love letter against your skin. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says, his voice low and gravelly. 

He moans, closing his eyes as you begin moving your hips over him, forward and back, beginning to ride him like you’d asked to earlier. Large hands make their way to your hips, as you continue your movements, this time leaning down to kiss him. Luca moans into your mouth as your tongues tangle together, your hips never ceasing their grind against him. 

It feels too good. 

You feel too good.

You break the kiss this time, placing your hands on Luca’s chest for leverage as you begin to speed up your pace, letting out a moan as you fuck yourself on your lover. Back arched, hair messy, and your head thrown back, you’re completely lost in the way that he feels inside of you. 

“Look at you,” Luca marvels, hands everywhere as you bring yourself closer to your second orgasm of the night. “My god, love.” 

And before you know it, Luca’s sitting up, sitting tall, wrapping one of his long arms around your torso while the other braces against the bed behind him. He’s thrusting his hips up into you, his hand moving to the small of your back to keep you in perfect harmony with him. The way he hits the back of you with each thrust, how deep he is, how good it feels has you so, so close for the second time tonight. You cry out in response to a particularly hard thrust as your body slumps, resting your forehead against Luca’s shoulder. 

You are no longer in control. It’s funny really – and sweet – that he let you think even for a second that you could be. But when he’s bouncing you up and down like this over his hard length, thrusts becoming more erratic, more chaotic, sloppier, you have no choice but to surrender to him. You hold onto his back and his shoulders for dear life as he fucks up into you and you can tell he’s close too. 

“God, you’re so good. You’re so fucking good at this,” you whine, all nerves, and explosive pleasure behind your admission. 

“I’m close. Baby, are you-?” Luca struggles to get out, the tension in his brow telling you everything you need to know. 

“Yes. Harder. Fuck. I’m gonna cum,” you sob, sure that your neighbors will send you the dirtiest or looks when you run into them in the hallway tomorrow. 

You cry out as his fingers return to your clit, rubbing hasty circles against you in an effort to take you there with him. All you can do is moan as you busy your mouth with leaving kisses and love bites against his shoulders and chest. 

It’s somehow too much and not enough all at once as your orgasm rips through you, your entire body contracting against his. You bite down on Luca’s shoulder, and you think the pain and pleasure combined is what gets him across the finish line as he fucks you through your climax. Before you can properly come down, it’s one, two, and then a third hard thrust up into you before he lets out a primal grunt, pressing your hips down hard against his. 

Luca stills inside of you, panting as the ripples of pleasure course through his body, his ears ringing from how hard he came. His eyes meet yours, and he chuckles, moving a piece of hair from your face before tucking it behind your ear. 

“Hi,” he smiles, watching you carefully. 

“How ya doin?” you ask him, teasingly. 

He shakes his head with a laugh before pulling you towards him so that he can kiss you once again. 

“I’m great,” he answers, in between kisses. 

“Me too,” you agree as your lips curl into a smile against his. You press one more kiss to his lips before pulling back. As you climb off of his lap, allowing him to slip out of you, the two of you hit the mattress like you’ve just run a marathon. 

“Come here, love,” he says, encouraging you closer to him. 

More than happy to oblige, you curl up to his side, one of your legs wrapping around his as you lay on your side. You giggle, settling into the softness of moment, pressed up against the guy that just fucked your brains out. 

“What?” he asks, in regards to your laugh. 

“I just-,” you start, before giggling again. “That was really hot.”

Luca gives you a comforting squeeze, hugging you closer to him as you relax even further into his body. 

“Yeah it was,” he agrees, a grin spreading across his lips. 

He looks over at you to see that you’re on your way to being fast asleep. You’ve closed your eyes, so perfectly tucked underneath his arm as you rest against his body. Luca places a gentle kiss on top of your head as he grins to himself again. He’s not sure what to call it – this thing he’s feeling – because it’s too soon to call it anything, but whatever it is, he knows that his friend was right: 

He’s a goner. 

-------------------------------

Luca doesn’t know what he did in a past life to deserve this, but as he watches you take him into your mouth, he knows he must’ve done something right. Your name escapes his lips like a prayer as you spend your morning going down on him, completely incapable of ignoring the hard-on you woke up to minutes ago.

You’d promptly pushed him onto his back before asking if you could. 

And who was he to say no?

“Shit,” he hisses, as your tongue runs over the head of his hard, leaking cock.

“Wait, just-. I don’t want to cum yet. I-,” Luca stammers out, using all of his self control not to cum in your mouth right then and there. “I want to fuck you again.” 

His words shoot straight to your core as you release him, climbing back over his body and letting him roll you onto your back. 

“Do you want me to grab a condom?” he asks you, nipping at your jaw as his fingers discover that you’re already ready for him. 

His words from last night echo in your head: 

And I’m not seeing anyone else. 

“No,” you say, immediately searching his face for some kind of negative reaction. “Is that okay?” 

He nods, one side of his mouth turns up into that crooked smile that makes your heart race. 

“Fuck,” he rasps, his head spinning as he lines himself up with your entrance, beginning to push in. 

“Of course it is, love.”

[hockeyandhrsepwr]

Snap Snap 📸

Quinn Hughes X Photographer reader

Snap Series Masterlist

Y/NJohnson

Y/NJohnson I’m a photographer and I took this photo

Aka look at my hot boyfriend 

View all comments

Nucksfan  Thank you for your service🫡

Y/NJohnson I am a woman of the people🫡

JackHughes I'm waiting for the punchline

Y/NJohnson what punchline?

JackHughes there has to be something. you're never this nice to him

Y/NJohnson I can't just appreciate my boyfriend?

_quinnhughes he's not wrong......

Y/NJohnson 🫠

_quinnhughes Thanks babe

Y/NJohnson look how cute you are

Y/NJohnson I can't tell if you're being sarcastic but you're welcome

 Elblue Love it!

Y/NJohnson love you mama Ellen 

lhughes_06 Kent your sisters being gross 

Y/NJohnson Quinn your brothers being annoying

Canucks Favourite Hughes!

fan747 Quinn with facial hair 🤤

Y/NJohnson Exactly!! #bringbackthebeard!!

_quinnhughes I remember you saying something about beard burn.... 🤨

kentjohnson.13 bleh

JackHughes nasty (not in the hockey way)

Y/NJohnson

Y/NJohnson we’ll miss you Schenner!! Enjoy living in an inferior city

#stoptradingallquinnsfriendsaway #toomanygoodbyes 

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LukeSchenn Of all the pictures you could've chosen 

Y/NJohnson you know you love me 

LukeSchenn I know you care

Y/NJohnson just shout whenever, and I’ll be there 

Bboeser you are my love, you are my heart

Y/NJohnson and we will never ever ever be apart!!!!

_quinnhughes  girl quit playing 

Kuzya_096 XXX thats wrong, you’re out 🙅‍♂️

Y/NJohnson god thats embarrassing

Y/NJohnson pssst LukeSchenn, how much for you to clock Q next time we play the Leafs?

_quinnHughes are you serious right now? 

Y/NJohnson I think you’d rock the ‘just got my ass kicked’ look! Is it wrong to want to see that?

_quinnhughes Yes!!!

Y/NJohnson oh grow up, its a little punch. Jack wouldn’t do it so I have to resort to other measures

_quinnhughes JackHughes seriously?

jackHughes Oh yeah, she tried to pay me 20 bucks to hit you

_quinnhughes Well thanks for declining 

Y/NJohnson yeah, cause he’s a fucking wimp and didn’t want you to hit him back

jackHughes you didn't grow up with him, he's a menace

Y/NJohnson Oh I'm aware and I chose to be with him which might be worse

lhughes_06 yeah it definitely is

Canucksfan4894 Justin Bieber? She’s a woman of taste. 

Y/NJohnson  oh, thats courtesy of the locker room. Lots of Beliebers in there

Canucksfan4894 LMAO really?! Who

Y/NJohnson where to start? 

_quinnHughes I will revoke your visiting privilege 

Y/NJohnson  See the pass hanging on the mirror? That means I’m untouchable motherfucker 😎

Y/NJohnson

Y/NJohnson Any speculations about trades are irrelevant. He’s here till I say he can leave BBoeser

view all comments

Fan5758 Thought this was an official announcement

Y/NJohnson It is. I’m the boss and I say he stays

Canucks not how it works unfortunately :(

Y/NJohnson You can’t take away my emotional support dumbass! 

BBoeser I'm flattered, but I thought that was Quinn?

Y/NJohnson no, he’s my emotional support depressy dumbass. There’s a difference

BBoeser Oh sorry

Y/NJohnson god Brock, keep up 🙄

_quinnHughes Babe, you can’t keep doing shit like this

Y/NJohnson I haven’t been fired yet so I’d say I can

Y/NJohnson I know y'all think I’m joking but I will lock him in my basement

_quinnHughes we dont have a basement

Y/NJohnson well I'll lock him in the coat closet then. Jesus Quinn stop ruining my fun

Jackhughes yeah jeez _quinnhughes let her kidnap someone in peace!!

Kentjohnson.13 Youre living together !? 

Y/NJohnson did I not tell you this? 

Kentjohnson.13 NO!

Y/NJohnson oh, well whatever. 

Y/NJohnson

Y/NJohnson I’m a photographer and I took this photo (round 2)

view all comments

_quinnnhughes really babe?

Y/NJohnson I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my awesomeness

Canucks48 legend 🙌

_eliaspetterson why'd you do me like that? I thought we were friends!

Y/NJohnson I couldve chosen worse photos. I'd call that being a good friend

Canucks4985 Quinn always looks so sad!

BBoeser what is going on in the 5th pic?

Y/NJohnson Cap being a boss, obviously

kentjohnson.13 can you just be normal?

Y/NJohnson ew, why would I want that?

_quinnnhughes don't be mean to my girlfriend! She's perfect

lhughes_06 even when she posts these photos?

Y/NJohnson aw, you think I'm perfect? 🥹

kentjohnson.13 no one else does

Y/NJohnson didn't ask you but thanks bro

Y/NJohnson I drop a picture, now these b*tches feel attacked

_quinnhughes I wonder why

BBoeser I think you mean 1 bitch

Y/NJohnson you're right, its _eliaspetterson

fan857 Queen shit

Canucks Giving the people what they want

Y/NJohnson yeah, since I'm not allowed to post them on the official account anymore.

kentjohnson.13 I can't tell when its you commenting from that account anymore

Y/NJohnson that’s the point little bro. You’ll never know….

Kuzya_096 I'm kind of scared to see your camera roll

Y/NJohnson This is the worst of them

_quinnHughes I dont believe that for a second

williamlockwood Not the penalty box one

Y/NJohnson My personal favourite

jackhughes mine too. Mom hates it though

Y/NJohnson and yet he's still the favourite

Lhughes_06 thats uncalled for!

[rileytwenty]

IDIA || an Avatar story (x Neteyam)

Chapter 2

Masterlist

(English Na'vi)

"Idia?" Jake entered my tent. "Norm said you'd be in here. He also said you'd looked awfully pale when he passed you. You okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be? I'm only being asked to leave the only home I've ever really known to go and try to assimilate into the reef clan."

"You'll be fine, Idia. My family and I will have to adapt, too."

"You know, I can't even swim? No one ever taught me."

He paused a beat. "Seriously?"

"I hardly ever get to leave this place without my own ikran. No one in the clan can stand my presence. Who would have taught me? Norm? He's too busy with his plants." This was probably the most meaningful conversation I'd ever had with Jake.

"I'm... I'm sorry. It's just that Neytiri-"

"Thinks I'm a demon. Right." This attitude had been pent up a long while, and it was finally pouring out. I felt liberated. "I don't mind being ignored, okay? It's just how it is. But you're asking me to go out there and depend on you guys and on a clan I don't know when you've never been there for me before. It's hard."

He let his head drop into his hands. "I know, Idia, and I'm sorry. But this is trying for us all, alright? Could you try not being so difficult?"

For a fleeting second there, I thought I was getting somewhere with him. But no. He was only going to hear what he wanted. "Yeah, okay."

"So, you'll come?"

"I don't really have a choice."

"No, you don't. But I'm glad you made the right one." The man stood, patted me on the shoulder and left the tent.

This was really going to happen. Wrapping my head around that thought was a tough thing to do. I was going to be leaving Norm, the lab, the safety of the cave system. I was going to have to change my lifestyle to that of the reef people. Most challenging of all, I was going to have to learn how to swim.

-------------------------------------------------------

The leaving ceremony was two days later. I spent my remaining time at base camp in the lab with Norm, having him teaching me everything we knew about life on the reef, which really wasn't much. I suppose it was his way of trying to help me, and of saying goodbye. It wasn't a forever goodbye, I knew that, but it was going to be rough not to see his stupid face everyday.

One would have thought one of the kids died with how Neytiri was sobbing. I tried to understand, and I knew that her reaction was reasonable, but I couldn't relate. I liked this place because it was safe and predictable, but not because it felt like my home.

Tuk cried as we mounted the ikrans. Neytiri stroked her hair.

"Neytiri, please. Bob can't handle much more weight with the supplies he's already carrying. I'll take Tuk, you take Idia."

"Jake, not today." Neytiri loaded Tuk onto her ikran with finality. Jake sighed, looking at Bob and trying to figure out how to lessen the load. He eventually turned to his sons.

"I’m not taking her." Lo'ak announced loudly, already foreseeing his fathers request.

"Lo'ak!" Jake hissed in my defense. I was too stressed by the day's events to be bothered by Lo'ak's comment. "Neteyam, can your ikran handle taking her?"

"Yes, sir. We will be fine." Neteyam responded, already on his ikran. He extended a hand to me and I took it. Wordlessly, I stepped up and sat on the neck of the animal. He helped me adjust a bit so he could see properly.

"Ready?" Jake called. With a chorus of hollers as a reply, the ikrans were in the air, creating a beautiful flocking formation. I forgot how much I'd loved the feeling of flying.

The first half of the ride was wet, cold, and silent. That is, until the silence was finally broken by an annoyed Neteyam.

"Why don't you have your own ikran, huh?" I turned my head to look at him, not expecting him to speak to me at all let alone be so irritated.

"No one ever taught me how to form Tsaheylu."

"Well, you must have bonded with a direhorse before, it's not much differ-"

"No."

"What?"

"I've never bonded with anything before."

He craned his neck to read my face.

"Are you being serious?"

"Of course. Believe me, if someone had allowed me to come on an ikran bonding journey, I would've. Flying is amazing."

"Allowed you?"

I didn't respond to that, unsure of what he was asking. Neteyam took that as me having discomfort towards the topic and he respectfully let the conversation die back into silence.

The remainder of the trip was long and trying. I was very sore when we reached the sandy beaches of the Metkayina clan’s home.

We circled around on the ikrans, announcing our presence clearly before landing. A mob of Na’vi had formed on the other end of the sand strip where we’d landed, and they didn’t seem particularly welcoming.

“Leave it.” Jake warned Neytiri as she attempted to arm herself with her bow. She scoffed but put the weapon back and grabbed Tuk’s hand.

Neteyam copied his father’s peace-urging gesture with his arms, and we approached as a group.

The Olo’ektans spoke, and their mates hissed at one another. After a few minutes and some humiliation from Ronal, we were granted refuge.

“My children will show you our ways.” Tonowari gestured to the five of us forest Na’vi youths. We all nodded, except for Lo’ak who was practically drooling over the Olo’ektan’s daughter. I internally giggled at his boyish antics.

“Hello!” Said daughter cheered, shaking my hand. This was odd considering her mother just tantalized us over our dirty-blooded fingers. I instinctually smiled at her. “I’m Tsireya. I’ll show you where you’ll be staying.”

taglist: @im-kaii @itsemy01

[blakeswritingimagines]

Leave Before You Love Me

Summary: Feeling bad for your boyfriend's attitude you go to apologize to someone who didn't deserve it.

Word count: 3.9k

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Gran Turismo characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.

Feeling bad for the heat that was thrown at Jack by your boyfriend Nicolas Capa, having gotten the okay to drive around in the shiny gold car as long as you were safe and back by a certain time to which you had agreed. Driving to the Nissan Academy which left you sitting on the hood of the car watching on as the gamers actually drove while you waited to see Jack the older man you often enjoyed talking to until he left to teach driving now but smiled and waved when you saw him then wrapped your arms around yourself seeing his taller frame walk up to you as you softly smiled at him and spoke sweetly "I wanted to come by and say sorry for Nicolas's temper tantrum, and maybe see if there was a way I could make it up to you somehow?". "I'll be honest sweetie, Nicolas's reaction was not surprising in the slightest. It actually had very little to do with you." Jack gave a small sigh. "And this whole incident is just a symptom of a bigger problem in that boy's life, so you shouldn't take it personally at all. As for making it up to me, I'm not sure why you're trying to do that. I'm an adult, and you should be focused on your own needs, not mine."

The older and somewhat greying Jack smiled as you approached him with the apology. "No need to apologize." He said with a shake of his head, "Wasn't your fault in the slightest." He then gave you a curious smile as you mentioned 'making it up' to him. "Oh?" Jack said, "What did you have in mind?" The twenty-something-year-old in front of him the forty-something-year-old as you bit down on your lower lip after nodding your head in understanding, knowing the recent dinner that was meant to celebrate turned sour all because of your driver boyfriend Nicolas didn't want to take him seriously or hear him out about things even if the background Jack had with driving "I know but it still wasn't okay what he did." You gave him a small smile as you shrugged innocently but tilted your head to the side as you met his eye "Well I was hoping you weren't too busy? Maybe go for a drive or something?".

Jack didn't know what to make of the odd proposal at first. A younger woman asking an older man out. You were attractive sure, and he was fairly confident in his own attractiveness. But such a large age gap was something he had never dealt with before. At the least, it was a unique offer. "Well…" Jack said after a moment. "…I'd be lying if I said I wasn't interested." Although he did have things he needed to work on in the garage "Nah, the day's been pretty quiet," Jack replied with a shrug. He felt bad for you having to deal with that blow-up and it did sound like you wanted to get away from it for a bit. He decided a small distraction wouldn't hurt. "Yeah, let's go for a drive." the older man said as he gave you a reassuring smile, "Where do you want to go?". Smiling widely at his agreement as you stood up straight nodding your head believing he wasn't busy, motioning over to the passenger door as you got into the driver's side smiling to yourself before you started to drive figuring it wouldn't hurt to have some time away from everything and still make it up to him "Don't worry about it, I've got a place in mind" You spoke as you drove letting the music play in the background softly feeling happy he had agreed to join you.

Jack raised an eyebrow at your reaction. He had thought this was going to be just a short drive but you seemed to have bigger plans. The man shrugged. In response to your comment about having a place in mind, he simply nodded his agreement. He didn't much care really as he was sure wherever you picked would be fine. He settled back in the co-driver seat and looked out his window as you cruised through town. You drove to a more reclused area before you parked the car, which Nicolas used during races that Jack had recently stopped working with just to work with Nissan which you had been the only one to congratulate him on even if he wasn't all that excited to begin with, smiling over at him as different ideas filled your head of how to 'make it up to you' even if you didn't feel like you would go through with most of them since you were dating someone and you didn't think Jack looked at you the same way you had been looking at him since you met him.

Jack couldn't help but glance at you as you had parked up the car to have a chat with him and was now looking over at him with a smile. It was nice that you had offered to come by with an apology even though he felt it wasn't required. Your gaze then made him think and wonder what your plans for 'making it up to him' could be. It was probably nothing, but it didn't hurt to let his imagination run off for a little while, but he wouldn't want to ask directly as it might embarrass you. At first, Jack was wondering why you had parked so early. You both were still quite far away from the academy. Then he put two and two together. "You've got something up your sleeve, haven't you?" He asked his expression a mixture of amusement and curiosity. The man's voice was light and playful. He'd been around long enough to pick up the hints women dropped when they were attracted to him, and he got the feeling you were flirting with him at the moment. "I might." You admitted and smiled, with a touch of mischief on your face. A flirtatious look on your face. A mischievous smile spread across your face. "Yes, Jack, I've got something up my sleeve. What’s your guess? Tell me what you think, Jack. Then, I'll tell you what I have up my sleeve. You first." You giggled softly and looked at him with flirtatious eyes. The older man couldn't help but chuckle at the playful attitude. There was no doubt in his mind that you were flirting with him. Not only that, but you were enjoying it as well. He raised an eyebrow, trying to work out what you had in mind, "Alright, you really want me to guess?" He thought for a moment as you both sat in the car together. "Well, your boyfriend is away somewhere so you wanted to borrow the car he was using. But you also wanted to spend some time with me as well. Well, now, I'm only just starting to guess." Although with the tone of your voice and your body language, he thought he might have guessed already chancing it even if he was wrong. "You're gonna kiss me, aren't you?" He said with a smirk, as the older man leaned over towards you to give you an opportunity to make the first move.

"You got it, Jack." Your eyes gleamed with excitement and your smile only got broader as you nodded your head in response. You giggled and moved so that you were closer to him before tilting your head to the side. Reaching towards him slowly and brushed back his hair, admiring how soft it was to touch before taking him with your lips softly. You kissed him softly at first and after a moment, you added more passion to the kiss. It was all a game for both of you. A fun and playful game. Once Jack had guessed correctly, his reaction was to lean closer to you, putting a hand gently on your waist as he met you halfway for the kiss. It was a brief moment of closeness that you shared in the car but it was a pleasant surprise for the older man. Eventually drawing away from the kiss, he sighed, his face flushed at the moment's passion. "Someone's been waiting for that one". He teased. He tilted his head in the opposite direction, so his now free hand could play with your hair a bit as you kissed him back. As you both kissed again, he slowly slipped an arm around your waist. In between kisses, he asked, "You sure you wanna be doing this? I don't wanna be the cause of trouble with your boyfriend. You need to consider if you're really okay with this.".

"Of course, I'm okay with this." You replied as you pulled away with that same flirtatious smile and look, as you reached a hand up to caress his face. "I have been waiting for this to happen, for some time now." You giggled as you looked at him with your hands roaming around his body, his hair, his cheeks, his neck, his… You had wanted Jack so badly. "What about you? Do you still want to be doing this?" You were serious, playful, and flirtatious all at the same time. Despite the age gap, the man still felt like he was a teenager again. His heart raced as he met your sparkling eyes, the older man's hand now on your waist squeezing gently. He thought about your question for a moment. "Yeah I still want to, but you're gonna have to promise me one thing." He said, a mischievous smile on his face as he leaned over to kiss your neck before he spoke again, "You really mean it when you say you're okay with this. Yes, I certainly want to." Jack said with a nod, as he kissed you once again, "I'd be a liar if I said otherwise.". The man continued to brush through your hair a bit as the two of them kissed once more. "I just don't want to be the sort of guy to cause problems for you with your boyfriend." He reiterated as you roamed your hands across his body. Jack enjoyed the playfulness, but the other part of him felt slightly guilty. He couldn't have imagined Nicolas would approve of what he and you were doing.

Your hands started running down his torso. You smiled as you enjoyed and savored the moment with the older man you had been crushing on. "No worries, Jack." You whispered into his ears, your voice almost a whisper. "Nicolas does not have to know about this." You took his hands placing them on your soft thighs. "No one besides us has to know." Giggling and your eyes gleamed with excitement, your lips curled into a small cheeky smile as you waited for his reaction. As you spoke, Jack felt his face start to heat up as his hands began to run lightly along your smooth thighs, enjoying the texture. When you had finished speaking, all he did was nod in agreement. "You're right, no one has to know what we did." He said softly, as he continued his caresses around your thighs inching up higher, and began to lean in closer towards you as you both sat back in the driver and co-driver seat. His eyes were also filled with mischief and passion, as you both knew what was going to come next.

Placing your hands back onto his shoulders and pulled him even closer to you. The two of you shared a passion-filled kiss as you made more intimate contact. You wanted to enjoy this moment with Jack, knowing there only was such a limited time for this. And it would be wrong and unfair for your boyfriend, Nicolas, to ever know. But it didn't make you feel less guilty as you were having such an intimate moment with Jack, You giggled again, and a soft moan escaped your lips. You wanted him then and there, your eyes were gazing right into his. "Take me, Jack." Your words were filled with passion and excitement. The feeling of his touch and the moment you both were sharing was just perfect. As you pulled him in closer, your lips met once again in another passionate kiss. His hands kept running through the smooth skin on your thighs until he slipped his hands past your clothes and teasingly ran his fingers over your wet folds, as his mouth and tongue started to explore yours. A low chuckle escaped his lips as you moaned and begged for him. "As you wish, darling." He whispered back, as he lifted you up and carried you to the backseat. You now had all the privacy needed for this special moment.

You took a deep breath and smiled at him as he started grinding against you with a groan before undoing his pants. "I've just have to warn you of one thing, Jack." Your tone of voice changed again. "I love playing games, especially with a man as handsome and older as you." Another small, cheeky smile spread across your lips. "But this, right here, it's no game. I've been waiting for you for a while." A passionate and sexy look crossed your face as you moaned in the backseat, your eyes gazing into his. "Then I'm glad I could be that special someone for you, darling," Jack said with a small chuckle as he brushed your hair back out of your face. You didn't need to tell him twice that you were serious about this. He felt your stare, and it made his heart race a little in his chest. "I think you deserve some special attention right now." He added as his voice became a little more passionate, and he took your face in his hands and kissed you once again.

With his shirt off now, your hands started to caress his muscular chest, moving down further down his torso and down to his hips, squeezing his hips as you kissed passionately once again, your mouth devouring his, and your hands gripping at his body. As you moaned while he finished talking off your clothes, you softly whispered into his ears. "I want you, Jack." Your voice was filled with passion and excitement. Your movements were driven by your feelings for this older man and what you were feeling at this very moment. The way you were whispering to him and talking about wanting him had sent a tingly feeling through his body. It was almost like a rush of excitement, and it made it feel like time had stopped. Jack smiled through the kiss, knowing that he needed to take it to the next step. "I want you too." He whispered back, between kisses, as he slowly unbuttoned the top button of your shirt.

Your arms were still around his neck as you kissed, and you kissed back, with a hunger and excitement that you hadn't felt in a very long time. Your fingers ran down his chest exploring his body, and your senses were filled with the feeling of him. "You look… so sexy, Jack." You whispered seductively as you kissed him again. Your hands caressed his lean and built physique. The older man was in good shape and he knew it, but he found it was also lovely to see his younger counterpart's excitement and compliments about him. He continued the kisses back, moving his mouth back and forth between her lips and your neck and collar. "And you look… absolutely beautiful." He said before in between kisses, as he continued teasing you then slowly pushed his fingers inside of you with a groan. He moved his body closer to yours enjoying how wet you were over all this. You pressed yourself closer toward him and your bodies were as close to each other as possible. "Jack", you said with a soft moan, your face glowing with excitement. "I wanna show you," you whispered, your hands roaming up and down his back, exploring every inch of his body. "Just how much I want you." You bit on your lower lip and kissed him once more, passionately and with desire as you started moving your hips against his fingers with more moans on your lips. He held you closely as you kissed, holding you close to his body as your hands explored all aspects of him. His muscles were still firm but he had lost some mass since his racing career. You would feel the difference in how he was built compared to Nicolas. "Show me, darling." He whispered back once your lips parted. With his back pushed up against the seat, and his legs on either side of you, he was almost on top of you, his body pressed against yours. He'd pulled you closer by putting his arms back around you.

Moaning loudly and whispering, holding him close and caressing him as you slowly lose yourself in the moment of pleasure. Your body shuddered and trembled as you felt his fingers moving faster inside of you. "Don't hold back, Jack." You whispered seductively in his ear as you kissed his neck passionately leaving marks. "Make me yours." Your eyes sparkled as they met his as you looked him in the eyes with excitement, anticipation, and desire as the feeling of Jack's body was so different from the one Nicolas possessed, It had been a long time since you actually felt a man's touch at least one that cared, and the feeling was just divine and perfect. Jack was glad you were losing yourself to the moment. He didn't feel guilty anymore about his relationship with you, and your words were turning him on more and more. "Oh, I haven't been holding back from the start, darling. And I'm not going to start now." Jack whispered back as he curled his fingers. "You're mine." His other hand slipped up your chest before he started to explore your breasts as he toyed and pinched at your nipples.

Moans escaped your lips as your body shuddered from the touch of his hands exploring the deeper parts of your body. You could feel how excited your body was, as it trembled and shook with so much passion and excitement inside. There was no holding back, as you moved your head to the crook of his neck. "I'm yours. Only yours, Jack." You whispered seductively before your lips returned to his mouth once more. Your body shuddered with a loud moan. You clenched your teeth slightly as your hands gripped him tighter, you groaned softly as you slowly lost yourself to the feeling of pleasure, "Oh, Jack." You closed your eyes and you moaned his name loudly, as your back arched from the feeling and the sound of your voice moaning seemed to make Jack even more excited than before. You opened your legs wider to give him better access to your body and him to explore. Moans and groans escaped from Jack as he felt your pussy tighten around his thick fingers. Not the first he'd got, but it still made him shiver a bit. Your hand grip tightening around him as well as opening your legs for him, told him exactly what he wanted to know. And now he was finally able to bring you to your breaking point. "You've been a good girl." He spoke in a calm tone, as your back arched and you moaned. Feeling your body shake with excitement, gave him a rush of excitement that he had never felt before from a woman. He gave a low moan as he pulled his fingers out of you and slowly thrusted his hard leaking cock inside of you and watched as your body continued to shake and shiver from the feeling of pleasure you were getting. All thoughts left his head as he gave in to his own pleasure, pushing himself further into you as his hands gripped your hips with more force. "Ohn baby…" he said in a husky voice as he pushed further into you feeling how warm and tight around him.

All you could do was moan as you lost control of yourself as he started to pick up his pace. Your hands gripped and clawed his shoulders, as you moaned louder and louder. When he uttered your name, a loud moan left your mouth. A wave of pleasure rushed through your body, and a few seconds later you reached your peak as your eyes rolled back and your whole body seemed tensed up with pleasure for a few seconds. "Oh, God. Yes, Jack." He felt your grip around him becoming weaker as you came from your state of pleasure. The older man felt like he was on top of the world at that moment as he roughly moved his hips against yours groaning under his breath. No other pleasure in the world compared to what he got from you right at that moment. When you finally released and your grip around him weakened, the older man looked down and gently kissed the top of your hair as he slowed his hips down. "You have no idea how good that felt, darling… And I hope you enjoyed it too. You really are just as beautiful and sexy as I thought you were."

You were a little dizzy after cumming. You felt like a feather, light and playful as he kept thrusting slowly before closing his eyes with a low rough groan in your ear as he spilled his seed deep inside of you. At this moment you were happy and content. "Yes Jack, I enjoyed that", you said with your usual flirtatious smile as you kissed once again, with all the passion and excitement that had been building up inside you for a while. "I hope you don't mind that I was the one who took… things a little further. I knew what I wanted and I took it." Your eyes were almost glowing as you whispered in his ear. When you kissed him again, he could tell that there was definitely a different feeling in the kiss, a different dynamic. You may have taken things further, but you took them in a way where you took the lead, and it definitely turned him on. "Don't mind at all, darling. I think I like it when you take charge." He said with a sly smile, as his hands left your waist and went up to your cheek. "I'm glad you took what you wanted because now you're mine and I can take what I want too."

Your smile grew bigger upon hearing how much he liked you taking the lead. You wanted him to understand how much you enjoyed it, and seeing his smile grow bigger made you feel proud and powerful that you were able to make such a strong man like him your prey. As his hands left you, you grabbed them so you could pull yourself closer to him. "All yours, Jack." You looked deep into his tired eyes, with passion, fire, and love pouring from your own. "Whatever you want, Jack." You whispered seductively, your voice filled with lust. Jack's eyes looked deep into yours, staring right back at you. The moment felt like time had stopped, just the two of you, and as he laid on top of you, he felt a rush of power and dominance. He felt like a tiger in the room with his prey, and there was nothing that you could do to stop him. And yet, he felt an affection and a connection with you, that nothing he had ever experienced, or matched with anyone else.

[journey-to-the-attic]

i'd love to hear your thoughts on the remaining three (for the Sin Thing) even if it is just you pulling thoughts out of a hat

alright, then here we are! levi and belphie aren't in any particular order, i think they could go either way around - but lucifer is meant to come last.

warning long post ahead. now let's go!!!

levi:

levi is an interesting one because despite being the most insecure of the brothers, i think he's actually one of the most comfortable in himself as a demon

which actually relates to his insecurity i think - since he thought of himself as a 'useless angel', it follows that a 'useless angel' would make a 'good demon'

plus his arc in nb s1 is all about him coming to terms with his choice to follow lucifer, and deciding he doesn't regret it, which i feel would contribute to that

so building on all this... the idea is that levi's insecurity often makes him compare himself to his brothers, and the idea is that - having watched his brothers recover from their Sin Thing and really come into their own as avatars, his envy makes him feel inadequate all over again

he's not even a good demon anymore because they all make better demons than him, he's certainly not a good brother because he's been totally useless in saving any of them so far, and he was a useless angel back then too

his symptoms would initially just make him more reclusive, so it takes the others a while to notice, which only exacerbates his thoughts

thinking of the jokey comic i made on this topic though... i think levi's solution would actually work in this way

sitting him down and seriously talking to him would make him panic - he doesn't want to confront these feelings, and he's bound to convince himself that any comfort is insincere, just trying to make him feel better

whereas just shocking him so much that it grounds him would be much more likely to make him think more rationally

though i think i'd take the situation a bit more seriously

so levi has a kind of explosive fit, then leaves the house of lamentation - hides at the bottom of a lake, it's raining like hell, similar set-up to the comic

rather than standing to the side and yelling at him, though, ik wades into the lake and enters his inner world there

levi's inner world would be some kind of fantasy setting - a performative feel-good hero's journey story, except all the npcs keep making odd little snide side-comments (these are his thoughts peeking through)

ik goes through this setting deadpool-style. she is not taking ANY of it seriously, she makes fun of all the monsters, cracks jokes instead of engaging in dramatic dialogue, etc.

the idea is that she's just kind of batting away these 'i suck so much' ideas because they're not even slightly possibly true to her

she's 'breaking the fourth wall' until the levi in the inner world 'becomes self-aware' - i.e. finally gets grounded enough to take what she has to say to heart

so he wakes up in the lake, the rain stops; the other brothers are waiting for them

supportive brother moment <3

the key thing for ik is that she's not expressing he's 'enough' for her, but just that she wants him by her side, which i think is a sentiment levi would prefer

the idea of being 'enough' is such that he'll always convince himself that he isn't, but knowing that ik still wants to stay with this loser of a big brother regardless of any of that comforts him

belphie:

now initially i did think to connect belphie's Sin Thing to lilith

but it ended up making his whole deal too similar to beel's - with the same idea that he represses/has a bad reaction to his sin because of shame, the idea being that he was too idle - too 'slothful' - to save his sister

and, to be honest, i think it's kinda a discredit to belphie to center all of his character conflicts around lilith

is lilith's death a defining moment for his character? yep! can he have emotional hang-ups and encounter obstacles in his progress that aren't to do with it? also yes!

(also ngl i'm just kind of sick of lilith and her whole deal. don't tell anyone)

so instead i'm going for the idea of belphie feeling 'left behind'

ig it does connect to lilith but it's more of a residual thing - it's not really to do with his grief for her death directly, more to do with his own Bad coping mechanisms

the idea is just that he feels like they all move on too quickly

they pick themselves up so quickly after their Sin Things, they were up on their feet so soon after falling, they seemed to forget everything that happened to them in the war so fast

this is once again to do with the idea that belphie, as the youngest brother, has been detrimentally coddled in regards to these things, and has NO fucking idea how to properly deal with loss

(which resulted in devastating consequences in the original timeline)

the others haven't tried to talk to him about his grief for lilith, nor about their experiences during the celestial war; when they all had to support each other after the fall, they comforted him, but never ever discussed the pain of it all

it's like the doctor refusing to talk about your actual symptoms because they're afraid of making you uncomfortable, and instead just soothingly going "it's okay, just take some ibuprofen and see me in the morning"

and since belphie doesn't know how to heal from these things, he just represses and forgets about it - and he becomes increasingly afraid that the others will get too far ahead to catch up and they themselves recover

to be fair, it's not entirely his brothers' fault; belphie himself is also used to being complacent, and so hasn't actively sought out healing either

it's kind of similar to levi actually, in that they both feel bitter about the others' progress - except levi turns his feelings against the others (envy), while belphie internalises and blames himself (his sloth stops him from working to keep up)

belphie's frightened of moving on, too - he doesn't want to tie the pain to himself forever, but he feels like it's wrong to forget, too

and all this compounds to indecision and a refusal to linger on it

so when the sloth takes over he defaults to "i can't do anything, nothing will change, just lie down and go to sleep"

but he also can't bring himself to sleep - so instead, he goes around incredibly sluggishly, putting as little energy as possible into anything, not caring about anything else that happens around them

then once his brothers finally wrestle him to bed, he goes completely still and doesn't wake up

belphie's inner world would just be a completely empty void, with him at the centre, completely alone with his thoughts - forced to confront it all, but unable to because he doesn't know how

so when ik gets there, what she says to him would be similar to what she does in chapter 40 of jtta - reassurance that it's normal to grieve, to feel anguish, that it's not his fault he doesn't know how to deal, that he will one day be able to carry it and he will deserve to do so

apart from that, i think she'd just sit there with him, let him turn it all over in his mind, let it out, cry like he's been stopping himself from doing until now

belphie's been tempted to simply focus all his anger on humanity, blaming them for the war and everything, but having made fast friends with ik when she first gets nightbrought - this is also proof to him that he isn't governed by his grief

also, it's probably especially important to ik that she do this right - after all, in her original timeline, belphie didn't get this help, and in the long run ended up killing her because of it

lucifer:

it's generally the trend that lucifer comes last with these things

i did change this for the pact order in jtta, but that was because i felt it made more sense, given the different direction lucifer's arc takes to canon

here though, it does work (with my own reasoning for lucifer's sin thing) for him to come last

now. all of the brothers have self-worth issues on some level or another, but lucifer's in particular are on a whole other level

he thinks he's always right. he hates himself more than any being in the universe. he can't fathom being second-best. he knows he is awful. he thinks he's better than everyone. everyone is a far better being than him. he's strong and useless and he must be chosen first even though he doesn't deserve it

i think lucifer would've known he'd go through this Sin Thing from the very beginning, but his brothers are fairly convinced he'll either fight it off immediately or never have it happen in the first place

it's a constant thing with him, he's never as capable as the image he projects, and because he hates letting it fail - he doesn't reject the idea that he'd be immune

and i think part of him would actually be a little convinced; surely he of all demons would be able to resist this stupid force?

lucifer can be extremely close-minded sometimes, and this is working against him right now because he hasn't realised that all of that 'i'll be fine' spiel is the pride talking

so when he starts feeling it happen, he sort of spirals, which only exacerbates the effect - especially since he instinctively isolates him with his work, not wanting his brothers to see him like this

what makes it worse is that he thinks "didn't i learn my lesson? didn't i learn to stop doing this? if mammon didn't think to go to ik, and if ik hadn't come to me, i wouldn't have accepted any help. i would've tried to do it all myself, and we might've lost satan in the process. we might've lost our whole family in the process. i was entirely useless for whole ordeal."

and he knows what he should do, but he can't because his pride is in control - what's more, he feels it's his own fault that he can't stop it, which only lets the sin dig its claws in deeper

plus, because lucifer's so well-practised at keeping this facade up, none of his brothers notice what's happened for about a week

mammon can tell something is off, but lucifer squarely rejects his offers of support and brings up his trouble-making in response, which successfully chases him off

i feel like in this case, it's important that lucifer actively accepts ik's help - rather than her just jumping in to get to him, as has been the case with everyone else

she'd have noticed something was up as well, and has been making gentle attempts at asking him what's wrong - which lucifer has brushed off, reasonably naturally

after hearing how he completely rejected mammon's offer of help, though, she decides to throw caution to the winds and goes to see him in his office

lucifer's response is to yell at her

now he's proven himself capable of being a massive bitch before now. however, this is on a whole new level

he's never insulted ik herself before, for example, but with his pride talking he's stooping to levels never before seen

once he's done ik just kind stands there and stares at him blankly

now, this is the SEVENTH GODDAMN TIME ik's had to put up with this sort of thing. fourteen if you count the first round back in the original timeline

she is so tired. so she really can't be blamed for crying

you would not believe the levels of regret lucifer immediately feels

in fact said regret is so strong it actually drowns the pride out for long enough for him to immediately start apologising

ik (very embarrassed by the crying) just kind of shakes her head like "it's fine, it's fine, forget about it, look can you just fucking listen to me"

in this case, there aren't any big dramatic speeches. the fact that ik's still attempting to help him after he just made her (who, famously, basically never cries no matter what happens to her) cry with his own awfulness is enough to snap him out of his funk, for long enough to let the others get through to him

see, mammon, sensing a disturbance as soon as the tears began, crashes into the office soon after that, and the ruckus duly attracts the other brothers

now lucifer's instinct is to go "shit", because now they're seeing that their eldest brother is not infallible

except his brothers' immediate reaction is not shock, or (rightfully, he thinks) disgust, but rather concern

who could've guessed, lucifer? your family fucking loves you

sure, you fucked up (and they're going to scold you for being mean once this is over), but that doesn't make you any less their beloved big brother

lucifer essentially gets saved by a combination of dadcifer instincts and his family's care, which i think is very fitting for him

[ilovemylawyer]

hello! i wanted to tell you that i love your works so much, every time i receive an email about your new fic my day becomes the best day. i'm yet to leave comments on every one of them bc i was too deep in my thoughts after reading them to comment straight away, but i wanted you to know that your writing is incredible, i still remember every single one of your fics. the way you write dyds and especially ohjae is truly breathtaking, they are so in-character, they are ALIVE. your ohjae is something out of this world, i love him so much, reading fics from his pov is so fascinating. you said that you write sex scenes poorly, but i totally disagree. you nailed all of them, especially in "as a corpse". i love both your high rating and low rating fics, i'll keep reading them no matter what, so please, stick to what you want to write, and most importantly, want to tell, sex scenes aren't as important as people make them to look. you are dragging the entire evilive fandom on your shoulders, thank you so much for your hardwork, i want to kiss you on both cheeks for that.

you asked about prompts, and i decided to share that i'd love to read more about doyoung and minhee's interaction. doyoung is good with kids, i feel like they would get along really well (and maybe even annoy dongsoo together as the mischievous kids they are). thinking about doyoung having a tea party with minhee or playing some games with her makes me so emotional </3

first let me say something short and comprehensive: thank you so much i love you so much and now let me respond (ramble mode) in full:

THANK YOU SO MUCH. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. seriously. seriously. your words give me strength that you may not be able to fathom. much needed strength. thank you. so much. really.

for me, writing has always been a pretty lonely endeavor. until i started sharing my writing for evilive, i hadnt posted anything online since like... 2018? something ridiculous like that. i tend to keep my writing reaaaal close to my chest because its inevitable that the fiction i write turns personal and i have become a pretty genuine hermitrecluselurker in the past few years.. sharing my stuff is a huge step out of my comfort zone and i have to be honest and say that it has NOT been easy!!!!!!! AT ALL!!!!!

but such kind sweet lovely lovely words keep me going <3 we are a SMALL fandom here. tiny. minuscule. there is like 50 of us. but i cannot just let this show fade into obscurity i need people to watch it and chew on it and enjoy it and i think what i am trying to do in my fics is just share the immense joy i got from watching it myself. and to prolong its life. evilive is by no means the perfect show but there is a lovely evil lawyer in it and i am not at all immune to an evil lawyer. in fact i am susceptible to them. extremely so. and i like playing around with han dongsoo in my docs. it is so much fun. and i really really enjoy sharing it because i LOVE reading fanficiton. being on the other side of it (writing it instead of just reading) is a lot different and very difficult at times but such praise like yours makes it all worth it <3

OHJAE. god i fucking love ohjae so much. having a lil guy at your side who carefully watches every move you make and silently critiques all of your decisions... a lil right hand man who is so ride or die that he does in fact end up dying. ohjae's (AND DOYOUNG'S) death is Soo hard for me to watch. his silence in his final scene is just detrimental to me. he deserves so much more. SO I AM SO GLAD I CAN BRING HIM BACK TO LIFE FOR US <3 he is a special little guy and oh my god he is so much fun to write. HE IS SOOO MUCH FUN TO WRITE i cannot emphasize that enough. he is SO important and i think he can be a great bridge/dove/string to bring dyds closer...he is a great Observer... he is so capable i love ohjae so fucking much and i am so so so honored to hear that he reads well in my stuff <3

RE: sex scenes. writing sex is SO DIFFICULT. i have so little experience with it which is why i think i am ultracritical of the sex scenes that i do write. i think it can be an extremely potent plot device (can't think of a better term) but i feel like i can't quite pack the horny porny punch that i know a lot of ppl go into fanficiton expecting. cuz at the end of the day i am not a pornwriter AT ALL, and i respect and admire those who can pull off a steamy heated scene, but i lean more towards the implications of the sex instead of the sexiness of the sex. if that makes sense. ALL THAT SAID, i am so glad you enjoy those intimate bits as well <333 you are giving me the confidence i need to not completely restrict myself from writing them!!!

i am accepting 2(two) cheek kisses from u <3 i have seriously been slaving away writing for this show and it is fulfilling as fuck but like i said, SUPER small fandom. with such a small, niche audience it is hard for me to gauge how my stuff is being received by the people... it is my own paranoia that chokes me about the stats and stuff, but the more i post the more comfortable i am getting with it all :D

finally: SAY LESS! i have a little wip already going that can verrry perfectly accommodate some uncle doyoung >:3c consider it done. i will push to finish+post that sooner than later <3 when it is done i will gift it to you on ao3!!!

thank you from the bottom of my heart and i hope you can continue to enjoy the endless supply of dyds that i have living inside of me <3 and apologies for this essay of a response but it is my way of showing thanks :-) thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[athenasparrow]

20 Qs for Fic Writers

Thank you all for tagging me! @wearingaberetinparis @annabtg @kay-elle-cee

How many works do you have on AO3? 27! That's counting my submission for @jilytoberfest masquerade

What's your total A03 word count? Currently at 181,851 words

What fandoms do you write for? Only HP!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? LAYLOM: The first time Lily kisses James, he doesn’t even know. DWOHT: But despite his best efforts, he couldn’t take his eyes off her figure as she moved effortlessly in rhythm with whatever song she had playing. He learned she was wearing more than a t-shirt when she slid across the kitchen on her socks, throwing her head back to sing words James wished he could hear. The Art of Identification: Lily Evans, star potions pupil, can't identify Amortentia when it's staring her right in the face (or nose). Stripped Back To Basics: In which Petunia probably regrets telling Lily to "put herself out there." The Right Door: Sirius and Remus try to set up Lily and James, but turns out they've already met.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes! I love to respond!! I am QUITE behind right now (there are 40 messages in my AO3 inbox LOL), but I'll catch up!

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I was just going to leave "no comment" here, but I thought I'd say... I know exactly what fic it is, but I've yet to put it up! It's been written for a while and people have encouraged me to publish it, but it's still just sitting in my WIP folder. Maybe soon!! I'll be vague so it still packs a punch when it arrives : )

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? All of my fics tend to have happy endings! I like to tie everything up in a little bow and only recently have I been learning some open-ended restraint. My personal favourite is DWOHT when Euphemia finally gets her (first) grandkid. I found it very amusing since she'd been hounding them for so long!

Do you get hate on fics? Not on a regular basis! I've had some gentle and invited criticism when I played @annabtg brave game. Then there was a rude anon, but I couldn't really take them seriously because they were just spouting nonsense so I spent most of the time giggling at their little brain LOL!

Do you write smut. If so, what kind? YES!!!! I am THE SMUT FAIRY!! Most of my fics have smut and I've written a few plotless porn fics as well. As for what kind...mostly vanilla and tame SO FAR! I should really write something more kinky.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Nope! I'm not interested in crossovers. Unlikely I will ever write one! I certainly like to base Lily and James in situations from other universes, but don't want Lily and James to interact with the characters.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of : )

Have you ever had a fic translated? I have not! There's one regular commenter who leaves all her thoughts in Spanish and I adore that because I get to practice, but that's about as close as I've come LOL!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Yes! It's both an enjoyable and exhausting process for me (mostly enjoyable because I keep coming back for more LOL)! My first was with @charmsandtealeaves (Stripped Back To Basics). I'm currently writing with @wearingaberetinparis 👀 Her brain works at an insane pace, but as I am a mere mortal you'll have to wait until my semester finishes before there's any chance of us publishing! 😂

What's your all-time favourite ship? JILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They are actually THE BEST!!!

What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? ALL OF THEM???? Look guys, I have like 25-30 WIPs and the list just keeps getting longer LOL! I'm hoping my gap year will help : )

What are your writing strengths? I think I come up with beautiful metaphors, my dialogue is interesting and my smut is hot! Recently added angst to my list, but it's still growing : )

What are your writing weaknesses? Proofreading LOL! Drawing things out! Putting my characters through too much pain! I'm going to be so much better at it after my collab with @wearingaberetinparis because she's an actual angst genius!

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Meh...I suppose if it makes sense, but I'd probably only bother with a language I know, otherwise, it would be quite tedious and out of place.

First fandom you wrote for? HP all the way! I haven't written or joined any other servers for other series/movies.

Favourite fic you have ever written? It's still DWOHT! LAYLOM and The Art of Identification are both up there though!

Tagging @abihastastybeans @call-me-the-cassie @jamesunderwater @ohmygodshesinsane @missgryffin

[sparklepocalypse]

Fic Writer Interview

@energievie tagged me in this, and it looks like a fun way to pass the time... so while I'm waiting for it to be midnight so I can post my New Year's exchange fic -- here we gooo!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?  98 (as of January 1st, 2024. I'm counting tomorrow's fic today because by the time most people on my dash see it, it'll be next year. 😂)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?  396,868 words (as of midnight; 386,482 prior to midnight tonight).

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? They're all RWRB, sooooo:

What's Symbiotic Will Always Be [E, 2.6k words; 1.2k kudos]

Take it Down Low / Make Me Get High [E, 2.1k words; 1k kudos]

In the Low Lamp Light, I Was Free [E, 3.1k words; 798 kudos]

I'd Wanna Be Felled By You, Held By You [E, 2.3k words; 766 kudos]

On My Mind (Let's Go) [E, 10.7k words; 704 kudos]

More questions (there are 20 total!) and a blank version of them below the jump!

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I try to at least reply with an emoji if I can! But generally, I try to match the energy of the commenter. I really enjoy hearing from people about my work and want to make sure they know I appreciate them for taking the time to leave their feedback.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? Oh jeeze, we'll have to harken back to pre-therapy Mags, well before 2023, for this question. (Current Mags has had a ton of therapy.) Probably I Stole Away and Cried [Supernatural RPF, M, 5.7k words]?

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? I am a lady who loves a happy ending. I'm going to nominate So I Will Weather the Storm [Red, White & Royal Blue, E, 9.8k words] for Happiest Ending in a Mags Fic.

7. Do you write crossovers? I used to write fics with elements of both Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series, but I feel like that... doesn't really count. I also cross canons in the Red, White & Royal Blue fandom... but again it feels like it doesn't count.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? Absolutely. The early 2000s were a volatile time on the internets, as we fandom olds say.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? AHAHAHAHA wait, you're serious. Um... M/M, with a pocketful of kinks thrown in for flavor? My Kinktober 2023 [Red, White & Royal Blue, E, 92k words] series is a good place to get an idea of what sort of smut I write.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge, but I haven't been on Fanfiction.Net in approximately 15 years, and don't have a Wattpad account, so... who knows!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated? I don't believe so? But that might be fun.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Many moons ago, I used to co-write fic in the Glee fandom. I was one of the authors of the Kurtofsky IMs, for those of you who are in the know.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship? Don't do this to me, fic writer interview! Umm... probably either Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes or Jim Kirk/Spock. And no, I've never written anything for either of them. But I've read both voraciously.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? No comment. Because I don't wanna jinx it. Seriously. I haven't even started posting it because I don't want to jinx it.

15. What are your writing strengths? Smut, lol. Quirky, bantery dialogue. Making @hgejfmw-hgejhsf cry (complimentary, I think??).

16. What are your writing weaknesses? Finishing multichapter WIPs. 😐 Outlining -- I'm very much a "do what the characters want to do" sort of writer.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I'm generally down if I have a reputable source for any translation! I speak English and German fluently, but when it comes to Alex's Spanish in my RWRB fic, for example, I rely heavily on online lexicons and people who actually speak the language natively.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? Nope, not even thinking about other fandoms because I go where the dopamine goes, and I don't want to redirect the dopamine before I finish the fics on my Big Giant List.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? Written and published? Be Worthy Love, and Love Will Come [Red, White & Royal Blue, rated E, 30.8k words]. Written and not published? The Big Giant AU [Red, White & Royal Blue, rated E, wordcount still growing].

Want to play along? Blank version below!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

7. Do you write crossovers?

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

15. What are your writing strengths?

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

[puffpasstea]

Matilda

A/N: Thanks, again, for reading and sharing! Special shoutout to the anon who messaged me last night. I hope you like this one!

As always, comments, thoughts, suggestions, criticism etc. are welcome and encouraged!

Read Chapters 1, 2, and 3.

Chapter 4

I fumbled with my keys for what felt like an eternity: my hands shaking, missing the keyhole a few times, rotating them in the wrong direction once or twice. When I was finally inside, I let my coat, shoes, and bag all drop to the floor and ran straight for my bed.

Lying on my stomach, face planted into the pillow, the kiss played in my mind on a loop. What on earth possessed me to do that? Seriously, what's wrong with me?! The first person to show me kindness and the slightest bit of attention had me sticking my tongue in their mouth in less than 24 hours. I shifted to lay on my right side and wondered what Harry must be thinking right now. Uncomfortable, embarrassed, shocked, violated, disgusted.... the options were endless. And he'd have every right to feel that way.

My mind was racing with fragmented thoughts. I wish I could go back in time and take it all back. I need to apologize. I shall never show my face at work again. I should just pack up and move. Shifting again to lay on my back, I thought about what I'd want to say to him. I really don't want him to feel used or objectified. It wasn't like that. He just made me feel so comfortable in my own skin and made his home and his group of friends so warm and welcoming, and he went out of his way to be nice to me, no questions asked, expecting nothing in return. And I hadn't felt the touch of another human being since 2019. I just got caught up in the moment.

Gosh, even my apology sounds pathetic. There's really no way to save face here. I don't know that a dramatic explanation is necessary. Surely he has more important things on his mind than my fuck up? We don't even know each other that well. He'd probably forget all about me in no time. A part of me wanted to explain and apologize until I'm blue in the face. The other part wanted to run, hide, and avoid him for the rest of my life.

The buzzing of my phone in my pocket finally put an end to my circular thought spirals.

Dad (12:01 am): Your mother is upset.

Dad (12:02 am): She thought she was doing something nice for you.

Dad (12:03 am): You should still come. If not because you miss us, do it because she misses you. Can't you compromise to make your mother happy?

Seeing those messages appear on my screen was the last straw, tears immediately ran down my face.

***

The sun was rising over the hill by the time that I'd finally stopped sobbing and decided to get ready for work. There was a lot of insurance paperwork to be done if I was going to take out our rare books and collectables to be used on set this afternoon. I gathered my ID card and work items and tossed them, along with my phone, into last night's bag. Leaving my father's texts unanswered, I made my way to work.

***

The security guard on set glanced at my ID, confirming that my name was indeed on his list, and let me through. Not five seconds after I crossed the security barrier, Harry appeared in front of me.

"We should talk." He blurted out.

I hadn't yet had a chance to decide if I was going to choose the apology route or the run and hide route. Why is he ambushing me?

"I'd love to, but I'm running late to drop stuff off." I sprinted away as fast as my shaky legs could take me. So, run and hide it is.

Less than an hour later, as I was waiting for the director to sign her portion of the insurance papers, Harry approached me again, "Is now a good time?" he smiled nervously and made a conscious effort to uncross his arms.

"Actually, it's not. I- need to check on something. Shouldn't leave these books unattended until the papers are signed for real."

His face dropped and he sighed audibly. "You can't run away forever, you know."

I pretended not to hear him as I walked away. I knew I was acting childish. Why is he doing this? Why must he torture us both? This is excruciating and endlessly embarrassing for me, and I'm sure it's no walk in the park for him either. Why won't he just, let it go! It pained me to do this to him, but the thought of actually standing in front of him and having to look him in the eyes as I explain to him the logic behind my stupidly leaping to his side of the car and kissing him without warning felt a million times worse. I'm just choosing the lesser of two evils.

***

My benevolent plan, however thoughtful, was ultimately shortsighted. I'd failed to account for the 6:00 PM break on the schedule where everyone was free and the catering truck came by with snacks.

"You can't possibly have somewhere to go this time." Harry showed up with a cup of coffee and a plate of food. Why is he always feeding me?

"I know you take your coffee black, so, no, you don't have to go change it. I brought napkins and utensils too. No excuses. Please sit down?" though his tone was confident and his work choice was careful, he was blushing as he spoke. Looking into his earnest eyes, I couldn't bring myself to walk away this time. I sat down and accepted the refreshments.

"Harry, listen-"

"No, you listen. Let me speak before you change your mind and decide to run again."

I chuckled. Now it was my turn to blush.

" I think we should talk about what happened last night. I don't want to make a big deal out of it--"

"Okay, then don't!" I couldn't help but interrupt him again. It wasn't intentional. Simply hearing him utter the words "last night," "talk," and "big deal," made bile fill my stomach.

"You're really bad at following instructions aren't you? I said listen and let me speak."

"No. Look, if you really don't want to make a big deal out of it, then, can we just-- can we just pretend it never even happened? Never speak of it again? Like ever?"

He didn't say anything for a while. But he never broke eye contact the whole time, he looked me straight in the eyes as he tucked his lips in, and slowly frowned.

"Is that what you want? I mean, is it really what you want?"

What's that supposed to mean? Why is he making it sound like a trick question?

I nodded then finally mustered the courage to reply, "yeah...it's what I really want."

He continued looking at me, his expression unchanged. Then he shifted in a split second. Looking down at the fruit he'd brought us, he picked up a fork and stabbed a melon bite, "fine, then, consider it forgotten." He bit into his fruit.

The silence that followed gave my mind time to wander. Is he mad at me? Had I made the right decision? Why does it feel tense and cold between us? How do I go back to the instant ease from before I went and fucked it up? I ruined things; I should be the one to fix them.

"Hey guys! Mind if I join?" Harry's cast mate from last night, Christopher approached us.

"Have a seat, mate!" Harry scooted to make room for his friend.

Christopher looked at me and asked if I've been here all day. I explained that I'm only needed in the afternoon. To babysit some fancy books. He laughed and asked if I chatting was allowed during book-watching duties. "If you're serious about what you said last night. About not minding our literature questions, I mean. Could really use some help." Harry's head jerked as he looked up from his plate, shooting Christopher a look that his friend didn't seem to notice. Harry's eyes quickly shifted towards me, as if waiting on my response. "Sure! It'd be nice to have some company while I'm just sitting there, in between takes."

My words were directed at Christopher but my eyes searched Harry's face. For what? I wasn't sure. Approval? forgiveness? encouragement?

***

At the end of a very long night shoot, I gathered the books that I'd come to set with, and got ready to head out. The actors were back at their trailers, changing out of costumes, checking their props in, and getting ready to leave too.

I ran into Harry again at the parking lot.

"Need a ride?" he asked as he walked up to me.

"Ah, no, thanks. I got my own." I pointed towards my car. We stood there. smiling nervously at one another.

My phone buzzed. it was probably my dad again, so I wanted to ignore it. But Harry's intense gaze was making me feel transparent and nervous, so I needed to focus my attention somewhere else.

Christopher (12:01 a.m.): Thanks so much for all the help today! It's already made a world of difference in my scenes. Can I please buy you dinner sometime? as a 'thank you'?

Harry watched my face relax and my smile grow as I looked at my screen.

"What is it?" he asked mirroring my smile.

"Nothing, just a good work day, you know?"

[this-is-krikkit]

Hi Krikkit! How's your day going?

For the character game *drum roll*: LESLIE KNOPE

Thought I'd change things up a bit to explore some of our other shared fandoms 😅

xoxo

hey Alice, thanks for suggesting this one! i miss parks badly these days (tlou and nick offerman starring in it might have a lil to do with that) and i love that we share that fandom too, so kudos to you for that idea 🤗

favorite thing about her: her determination!!! she's so fucking stubborn when she wants to get something done, and she'll find a way to reach her goal no matter what! we have chosen to stan forever.

least favorite thing about them: how aware i am that i would not be able to stand her energy irl lmao like i love her a lot but anyone who tries to wake me up early the one time a month i get to sleep in WILL be killed

favorite line: "the only thing i will be waving is your decapitated head on a stick in front of your weeping mother!!" bc i love an overcompetitive drama queen who struggle to bury her feelings so deep that they end up sounding like over the top death threat during model UN ♥️♥️

brOTP: leslie x ron were always my fave friendship of the show, even before their epic scene in the last season

OTP: benslie is love, benslie is life. it's the healthiest relationship i've ever seen depicted on a TV show, and it's refreshing that they didn't destroy that for the sake of comedy like it happens so often (monica x chandler in friends, barney x robin in himym... i could go on)

nOTP: i guess anything that's not leslie x ben? i didn't like her with the cop dude, although he was funny. they never felt half as genuine and soft and perfect as benslie did from the very beginning

random headcanon: she tried being a supportive spouse and reading ben's star trek fanfiction once, thought it was cool but whatever yk, until ben joked that there probably were fanfic authors who wrote US historical figures fics out there. it was the beginning of a VERY long summer where leslie posted about 30 historically accurate M to E rated works on ao3, 2 of which were over 100k words multichapters. ben, half horrified and half impressed, commented dutifully on each chapter, even getting into virtual fights with rightists (is that a word?) who called leslie names bc they disagreed with the politics aspects of her fics, and even though nothing beats that actual real life punch he once threw to defend her honor, his internet chivalry effectively turned her on still. they had a short but intense reign as ao3's most productive power couple before the triplets came back from chris and ann's for school and they had to focus on their parenting roles + her presidential campaign again.

unpopular opinion: idk how unpopular it is, but there was never a doubt in my mind that she's the president at the very end of the series?? like ik they left a doubt there on purpose, but seriously, does anyone really think leslie's story ends with her being the first lady and not the fucking president when it's been her dream forever?? how rude can the universe be

song i associate with her: sadly, the get on your feet and make it happen campaign song x) anytime i hear her name that's what i think about and it's horrible bc it won't leave my headdd

favorite picture of her: leslie in a suit!!!!!!!!?????? 😍🥰🥵 that hair length and color suited her best too imo, oh god i miss her now 😭

[erwinsvow]

Hi! This isn’t a question but I seen another person talk about serial liking and how they hate it. So I have been trying to comment and re blogging on fics I like. I guess I just wanted to say I hope I don’t annoy you with my comments. Cause I don’t really know what to comment so they might seem repetitive.

hi!!! omg i love everyone who even interacts with my work, i really don't mind 'serial liking' or anything like that! i try to look through all my notes and i love seeing when someone's liking a bunch of things it makes me so happy they're liking everything! it's like they're going through the archives haha

thank you so much for commenting and rbing though! i read every single comment/tags in reblogs and i seriously <333 i love every single one. if i could hear everyone's thoughts who likes one of my posts i'd be in heaven. nothing better for a writer! thats why i try to leave a comment on almost everything i reblog myself! but no really thank you and you don't annoy me at all! you can say anything, even your favorite part or line is so nice to hear. but don't feel pressured, i don't mind when people just like something. ♡

[junggoku]

Lemon Curls and Latte Art - Ethan Ramsey x f!MC

book: Open Heart

pairing: Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Nina Valentine)

word count: 6,679

summary: Ethan’s been having a tough time with a case and desperately needs some coffee and time away from the hospital. His small impromptu trip to his favorite coffeeshop may just become more than he expected. (Alternatively: local doctor man goes to get coffee. Gets roasted for 5 minutes straight by cute barista.) A coffeeshop au

A/N: Soooo first and foremost, I’m super excited about this. I’ve been surprised at the lack of coffeeshop au’s in this fandom so I decided to take matters into my own hands. I’d like to give all my love to the wonderful @namkook​ for keeping me sane through this whole project and for helping me every step of the way. I love you and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you for putting up with my constantly annoying you with this. I typically don’t like my writing, I’m so proud of this one and I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I did when working on it. Without further ado, buckle in and enjoy! She’s a long one wheew

Sometimes it was easier to just drown it all out. The rustling of the nurses as they moved about. The moans and groans of patients as they anxiously waited for their diagnoses. The shrill voices of interns trying to suck up to him to better polish up on their resumes, instead of focusing on their damn jobs.

On that particularly busy afternoon, Dr. Ethan Ramsey felt it was especially crucial that he drown out all the background noises and forget about his surroundings for a moment, if he was going to hang onto his sanity.

He had been pouring over a patient file all morning, having reached an impasse. When something like this happened, it was best for him to go out and clear his head. Sighing heavily, Ethan pushes out of his leather chair, leaving the mountains of scans and paperwork behind him as he closes the door to his office with a resounding thud.  

-----------------

Day 1

The chime of the bell above the door signaled his arrival into Derry Roasters, a soft click of the hinges punctuating through the air as his eyes adjusted to the gentle lighting in the quaint coffee shop.  

The scene was completely opposite the hospital, with almost all of the tables here being empty save for an elderly man in the corner with his book. It seemed the cafe was experiencing a quiet afternoon, soft music playing from the small speakers lodged in the ceilings.

Whenever Ethan was stuck with a case he couldn’t quite figure out, he found himself wandering to the coffeehouse, a humble mom and pop establishment that made decent coffee. It was a step up from the caffeinated dishwater the hospital cafeteria served and he didn’t hate it at the very least. It was also close enough to the hospital that he could get to it by foot, but far enough that none of the gaggle of bright-eyed parrots interns would follow him to kiss his ass.

Crossing the distance of the room up to the front, Ethan stops right before the register. Having seen not one soul behind the counter, his hand found its way to the small silver bell waiting by the tips bucket, ringing it albeit impatiently. There was normally always someone waiting up at the front, the usual barista－a short and kindly old lady, her slightly stout face adding to the welcoming atmosphere－felt it necessary to be present at all times to best serve customers so they did not have to wait long. So much for that. Their service is going to shit.

A bright ding reverberates throughout the shop, ricocheting off the walls. With a purse of his lips, he waits for a few minutes for someone to respond to the bell, the dimple in between his eyebrows growing more prominent the longer time stretches.

About to forgo the coffee and just head back, his ears pick up a foreign sound coming from somewhere. Is that...singing?

Singing was perhaps too generous a term. There was a faint humming emanating from behind the door that led to the back, and his ears tickled as it continued for a few more seconds, before the door swung open and a figure stepped out.

Ethan’s train of thought stutters for a brief second as ice blue eyes meet a warm chocolate brown, wide and doe-like staring up at him in surprise.

She’s new.

Silence envelops the room and Ethan finds himself studying the woman in front of him as he does with everyone, an occupational habit he’s honed over the years.

Long, dark brown hair cascades over her shoulder like a wave, a pair of chocolate brown eyes to match the curtains as they peer up at him, a hint of curiosity in them. The new barista is donning a polo the color of mustard paired with the black apron of the coffeeshop. His eyes glance over the silver name tag that brandishes the name “Nina”. Next to the tag, a small frog pin sits crookedly, the silver lining a bit dim from what he expects comes from overwear.

In his musings, he doesn’t notice the barista, Nina, pursing her lips, “Are you going to order something or are you just gonna stare at me all day?”

Shaken out of his thoughts, he raises a brow at the bland tone of her voice, before deciding to ignore it, “The Vienna.”

Slipping his card from his wallet, he sets it down on the counter as she rings up his order, sliding the piece of plastic back to him once she’s finished.

Wordlessly, he starts moving over to a table nearby when she pipes up, “What? No ‘thank you’?”

He spins around, a brow quirked as he meets her eyes. The slight curl of her lips tells him she’s mocking him and his lack of a response.

“Thank you.” He speaks, voice flat and face unimpressed. Her lips twitch.

“Gee, you’re a real charmer, aren’t you. I do need to know if you want this here or to go,” Eyes lit with mirth, Ethan itches to end this interaction and head back to the hospital. So much for that break.

“To go.”

The smirk doesn’t leave her face as she turns around and gets to work, and Ethan is eternally grateful for the conversation being over.

A few minutes pass by before he hears his name being called. Striding to the pick up station where the barista placed his order of Vienna in a styrofoam cup, her cheeks lifted into a winning smile, one she must use on all her customers.

Ethan picks it up promptly, the desire to get back to work coursing through him strongly the minute he glimpses at her face (his mistake) and finds that she’s still staring at him with a strange amusement lighting her eyes.

“Hope it's to your liking, Dr. Ramsey.”

“How do you know my name?”

Nina raises her brow, and throws a look at the elegant Dr. Ethan Ramsey, etched into the fabric of his white doctor coat, “I’m assuming that’s your name since it says so on your coat. If you were trying to go incognito, maybe lose the coat next time.”

With a wink, the barista spins around and disappears behind the door to the back, not giving him time to answer to her quip. Something pricks at the back of his mind as he watches her go. Casting a quick glance down at his coffee cup, the letters Ethonk are scrawled on the curved surface, and he couldn’t tell if he wanted to laugh or groan. More the latter probably.

Sighing for what was possibly the millionth time today, Ethan tightens his grip on the cup and makes his way out, feeling more annoyed than when he had come. I’m not coming back here.

--------------

Day 2

Why am I here?

He sincerely had no idea why he found himself lingering at the front of Derry Roasters a few weeks later, shoes avoiding the crunch of leaves under his feet as a delicate autumn breeze curls through his hair and rustles the pages of the book he had nestled in his arm.

Ethan had initially planned to not come here again for a long while, having no desire to run into that impudent barista from last time, Nina, her name was.  

Annoying.

Shaking away the thought, he pushed the front door open and strode into the cafe, the click of the latch bolt falling back into its frame announcing his arrival once more. The shop was fairly empty again at this time, being so long after the busy lunch rush hour.  

As usual, Ethan made his way up to the register, but his steps faltered for a half second when he noticed a new addition to the counter by the pick up area: a small potted cactus, its thorny arms appearing almost golden bathed in the gentle autumn light streaming in through the windows.  

A little curious, he continues walking and taps the bell once when he makes it to the front.

Unlike before, the door leading to the back whipped open almost immediately after the ding, and out came the petite barista, long brown hair tied into a loose ponytail today. Small specks of what looks like cream powder dotting her cheek and on the sleeves of her peach-colored blouse, the brunette saunters over and plants herself directly across him.  

Chocolate doe eyes instantly find his blue ones and Nina flashes him an amiable smile. Or it would be amiable if it weren’t for the twinkle of mischief he catches in her gaze. He bites back a mental groan.

Ethan opens his mouth, prepared to just tell her his order quickly so he could leave, when she beats him to it.

“Did you see Henry?” Her voice is a little hushed, conspiratorial. Bemused, his eyebrows furrow in place of a question.

“...Henry?”

The barista nods her head in the direction of the pick up station, eyes darting to the potted plant he saw earlier and back to him, “Henry!”  

He’s not sure how to respond. Nina waits for a few beats before crossing her arms across her chest, ogling him for a reaction, “We just got it yesterday. I thought it’d be nice to spruce up the place,” She leans forward, her apron brushing against the register.

“You don’t feel a connection with it?” She pursed her lips, brown eyes twinkling with mirth. The furrow in his brows deepens, not quite enjoying the way she was eyeing him.    

“Why would I feel any connection to a cactus?”

“Well, you are one emotionally,”

Ethan lets out a short scoff, his expression wholly unimpressed, “We’ve had a grand total of two interactions.”

“And the two were all I needed to know everything,” Nina tosses him a tiny smirk, seemingly relishing in getting under his skin, a frown beginning to mar his features. How tedious.

Sighing deeply and already feeling exhausted, Ethan ignores the quip and barrels forth, “The Vienna.” He tosses his card on the surface of the counter, almost impatient as she gingerly grabs it and rings him up, saying nothing more all the while.

Not giving her an opening, Ethan snatches his card out of her grasp the minute she’s done, and turns around to find an empty table far away from the register.

“I’ll bring it over to you when it’s done,” He hears behind him as he continues moving.

Settling into a table in the back corner of the coffeeshop, Ethan sinks into the leather chair and opens his history book, determined to ignore and forget his interactions with the barista so he can take a break. Why he came back here when he already predicted this happening was beyond him. He won’t repeat the mistake again.

A few minutes later, Ethan feels a presence in front of him and peeks from his book to find Nina placing his cup of Vienna on the table. Turning his attention back to his pages, he reads another line from Robert Service before glancing back up.

She was still standing there. Hands clasped together in front of her chest, Nina was peering down at him, blinking innocently.

“...Is there something wrong?”

“No,” She answers, giving a slight shake of her head in emphasis. She still didn’t move.

“...”

“...”

“...Did you want something?”

Her expression shifts promptly, fixing a saccharine smile his way and a sense of dread creeps up his spine.

“Well you see,” Nina sweeps an arm around the expanse of the room, where only one other patron beside him was sitting in the opposite corner, tapping away on their laptop, “no one’s really here.”

He feels a budding headache pricking, “And what does that have to do with me?” He asks, tone flat.

Her large smile widens a little more, “I’m bored and you’re the most entertaining thing here.”

There’s a brief moment where the two of them did nothing, a staredown ensuing with the only sound coming from the ceiling speakers and the tap, tap, tap of the laptop.

Pressure behind his eyes growing, he brings up a hand to scratch at his stubble. Yes, he really regrets coming here today.

“Well what do you want to do then?” The defeat in his voice is evident as Nina starts shuffling over to the chair opposite him, appearing so pleased with herself Ethan could only breathe out another sigh.

“If it’s cool with you-”

“It’s not,”

“-I’m just gonna hang out here with you,” She plops into the leather recliner and beams at him, eyes scrunching into two crescent moons. Huh. “Besides, I’m doing you a favor really.”

His annoyance fading just a smidge, he eyes her, distrustful. Closing his book with a small thud, Ethan leans back, sinking further into the plush material.

“How on earth is you neglecting your work and bothering me when I’m trying to read you doing me a favor?”

Nina flicks her chin at the cover of his book. The glossy surface catches the warm rays of sunshine drifting in through the windows, the text Comrades!: A History of World Communism almost swallowed whole by the natural light.

“I am doing you a favor,” The steam from the coffee mug wafts up and swirls in the air between them, “I’m sure you’re already busy being a doctor full-time, I’m giving you a chance to take a break from your communist endeavors so you can actually enjoy your down time.”

Seeing no point in disagreeing when she looked determined to stay there, Ethan takes a sip of his Vienna, the liquid still warm and settles pleasantly on his tongue. Over the top of the cup, he catches Nina leaning forward slightly as though waiting for his reaction.

Putting the mug back down, he turns his head to the window, content on ignoring her still and watching the people strolling up and down the street outside.

Her quiet voice breaks him out of his reverie, “What’s it like? Being a doctor?”

At the question, Ethan turns his gaze on the barista, finding her peering at him with a mix of curiosity and...admiration?

He shrugs, “It’s alright.”

“...That’s it?” Her head tilts to the side, eyes widening as she silently urges him to elaborate. He’s not sure why he’s humoring her, but he relents and continues.

“It’s...it gives me opportunities to figure out the mysteries of the human body. To find ways to conquer and defeat the things that defeat us,” He keeps his gaze on her, watching as the brunette follows his every word like he’s telling her some universal truth.

Nina nods, seemingly soaking in his explanation and satisfied with it, “That sounds really cool. You’re like a hero,” She laughs a little, a tenderness in it that confuses Ethan, but he doesn’t say anymore on it. Hardly.

A beat of silence falls over them again. There’s no awkwardness in it though and Ethan’s content to let it stretch on.

“I wanted to be a doctor when I was younger.”

The spell is broken and Ethan’s attention is now directed solely at her, the barista tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. When he doesn’t speak, she continues, “Always wanted to help people. It just seemed like the perfect job for me to defend those who were fighting for their lives. For their second chances.”

The small frog pin on her apron gleams as she fidgets, light from outside hitting its metallic surface.

“Why didn’t you?” He finally asks, albeit hesitantly, “Become a doctor.”

A wistful look crosses her face and she smiles, “My brother’s health deteriorated and he  collapsed as I was graduating from high school. Things just never worked out,” Nina pauses and considers the room, Ethan noticing for the first time that the other customer had left, no more tap tap-ing sound to be heard.

“But it’s whatever. I like working here. And at least I get to keep my sleep schedule,” She jokes, eyes landing on him again.

Ethan doesn’t speak for a long moment, holding her gaze. At the lack of reaction, Nina begins to squirm, appearing nervous, but doesn’t prod him.

Finally, he finds his voice, uncharacteristically timid, “This place is lucky to have you.”

A blink and a beat later, and a glowing grin stretches across Nina’s face. She chuckles, a soft pink flush dusting her cheek.

Waiting another beat, Ethan clears his throat and begins to move, grabbing his book and nudging the now-drained cup of Vienna away, “I should head back. I have work. At the hospital.” He holds back a grimace. Moron.

Nina tilts her head, the action releasing a couple of strands to fall from her ponytail, “I would hope so, since you’re wearing your white coat,” She snorts when she sees the unimpressed expression on his face, “Go save lives, Dr. Ramsey.”

With that, the barista turns and heads back to work, humming softly as she goes.        

A feeling he can’t place courses through him, sending a slight shiver up his spine as he steps out into the street. Just a chill. With that, Ethan makes the familiar walk back to Edenbrook, the gentle breeze returning and dances through the soft locks of his hair the whole way.

---------------------

Day 3

“Quit stalling already and drink!”

Grumbling, he lifts the cup to his lips, taking a cautious sip.  

The silence settles throughout the room, and Nina leans forward just a little bit, in an attempt to gauge his reaction. He tries to keep his expression blank.

“...Well?”

“...”

Ethan lets the silence linger for another moment before bringing the cup back to his lips. Slowly, a smile begins to bloom across Nina’s face, bright and smug, “Heh. So what’s the verdict, Doctor?”

He refuses to give her the satisfaction of a reply, instead determined to keep his eyes trained on the inside of his coffee cup. His ears pick up a tinkle of a laugh.

“I told you you’d like it,” The barista giggles, her eyes forming crescent moons, as she attempts to stifle the full force of her laughter. Placing a hand on her hips, Nina gazes at him, her self-satisfied grin making a home on the corner of her lips. Ethan decides, right then and there, that he hates it endlessly.  

He especially hates how that cheeky ass smirk makes her eyes sparkle more.

Releasing a bone-weary sigh, Ethan sets the mug down on the table and leans back in the chair, training ice blue eyes on the brunette across from him, “I tried it. Are you going to tell me what it was now?”

Still beaming, Nina sinks down into the soft leather chair opposite him, hand coming up to tuck a stray lock of dark hair behind her ears. Crossing her legs, she glances down at the drained coffee cup, “Espresso Romano. As you can probably guess, it’s a shot of espresso with a slice of lemon served on the side and rubbed on the rim.”

A soft calming song plays in the background, the notes resonating through the air and floats around them, framing the little pocket of the world they were occupying. Nina looks back up at Ethan, holding his gaze as she continues, “The lemon’s zestiness brightens the drink and cuts off the bitterness. Which, no offense, but that looks like something you could use some help with.”

Biting back a retort on the tip of his tongue, he picks up the discarded lemon curl, long fingers absentmindedly playing with the garnish. The silence settles once more between them as he takes in what she said.

In a voice so quiet he’s hoping she doesn’t pick up on it, the words leave his lips: “It’s decent.”

The crescent moon smile she gifts him with tells him that she heard it loud and clear. He doesn’t say anymore, but he doesn’t need to. She hears the rest of what he left unspoken.

“Such a way with words. You really should’ve been a poet instead of a doctor,” Amusement never leaving her eyes, she leans over to pick up his mug and plucks the lemon peel out of his hands, dark brown hair falling over her shoulder at the movement. Soft afternoon sunlight streams in, bouncing off the tan of her skin and for a brief moment, she looks like she’s glowing. Ethan frowns, averting his attention to the space behind her instead.

Humming quietly, Nina stands up and turns, the soles of her white Converse squeaking in protest. Tossing him one more knowing smirk, she begins her trip back to the register, the arm of his empty cup resting on the crook of her finger. A minute later, she disappears through the door into the back area, the gentle music from the ceiling filling up the room in her stead.  

Ethan releases a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and glances back out the windows overlooking the street, the faint taste of lemon still sitting on his lips.  

---------------------

Day 4

The coffeeshop feels a bit different in the mornings, fresh dew and the gentle rise of the sun blanketing the room, wrapping it in a peculiar warmth. The lack of customers at this time adds to the ambiance, though Ethan doesn’t pay much mind to any of that at the moment. Instead, his attention is aimed at the disheveled barista in front of him and the mayhem surrounding her.  

The next time Ethan walked through the doors of Derry Roasters a week later, he was met with what he could only describe as chaos. A collection of discarded coffee cups littered the counter and drops of milk and cream dotted the floor all around Nina. The brunette ran a hand through her long hair frustratedly, apron stained with liquids.

A quick explanation told him that she had been attempting to perfect the craft of latte art, though Ethan would argue that you can’t perfect something you didn’t even have the basics for. Recognizing that her skills were abhorrent and wanting to please customers, Nina had made it a habit to arrive at the cafe very early in the mornings, where she could practice in solitude. And that was what he had walked in on when he dropped by, having thought to get coffee before his shift later that day.  

He watches her struggle with the milk for another minute, bumbling around like a newborn, before peeling off his white coat, a strand of hair falling just over his eyes at the motion. Nina turns at the rustle beside her and is greeted with Ethan’s tall figure peering down at her handiwork.

Startled, she takes a half step back, eyes wide in surprise, “What...are you doing?”

In place of a response, he rolls up the sleeves of his button down shirt and helps himself to one of the aprons hanging on the coat rack by the back area.

“Watching you spill milk on yourself like an infant is getting painful. I used to work as a barista through undergrad so I remember some things...” He pauses, gazing inside one particular mug that was housing what resembled more creamy vomit than coffee, “...though I’m skeptical if it could even help you at this point.”

The flat tone of his voice must have irritated her, as she shoots him a mild glare, a cool determination flashing in her eyes, “That sounds like a challenge, Doctor.”

“It definitely will be.”  

A couple hours later, the work area resembles a battlefield, thermometer and portafilters thrown haphazardly all over the counter, milk and coffee powder strewn across its surface in reckless abandon.

Ethan shakes his head, arms crossed over his chest and focused intensely on the mess she’s making, “You’re not doing it right.”

Nina groans, the sound tickling his ear. Her grip on the pitcher slackens which promptly spills more of its milky contents all over the counter.  

“I’m doing it exactly as you said. You just suck at teaching,” She mumbles, tsk-ing a little at the new addition blooming on her apron. Taking in the growing clutter decorating the counter, Nina lets out a sigh before turning to Ethan, “This feels hopeless.”

“Giving up already, rookie?” He quirks up an eyebrow, a corner of his lips twitching.

She stops and blinks at the nickname, but doesn’t comment on it further, “No!...Just. Ugggh,” With a loud whine that sounds awfully like a puppy’s, Nina sets the pitcher down, knocking it into the thermometer that was sitting nearby. Placing a hand on the surface of the counter, Nina leans into it, sagging with disappointment. The chagrin expression on her face so directly contrasted her usual bright grin that it makes his chest throb strangely.

Clearing his throat, Ethan glances back down at the mugs, highlighting all her failed attempts. Despite the mess, he could still see her progress, the more recent works showing slight improvements.

With a flick of his fingers, he starts selecting some of the cups out of the batch, “These aren’t too bad. The shape is starting to take place.”

Not looking entirely convinced, Nina skeptically eyes the attempts he singled out.

“You sure?” She points to one, “This one looks like a bad rendition of the Scream.”

Gently, Ethan nudges the pitcher and the thermometer towards her, voice quiet but firm, “It’s an upgrade from the foamy blob you made earlier. You’re getting there. You just need to keep working on your technique.”

Releasing a sigh, Nina relents and pours more milk into the pitcher, readying for another round.

Delicate sunshine slants through the windows and catches on the tips of her hair as she bends forward, eyes narrowed at the face of the thermometer. Ethan keeps a watchful eye on her movements, leaning towards her a fraction more.

Despite the intensity coming off of Nina as she tackles the task, Ethan feels curiously light, as though the usual restlessness humming under his skin was dimmed. Hovering a little closer, the weak scent of apples from Nina’s hair tickles his nose, as she turns to heat the milk. Grabbing the steam wand, she inserts it into the liquid and turns it on, the thermometer clinking onto the side of the pitcher.  

When she gets to the part of pouring the milk into the coffee, the hand holding the steamed milk trembles slightly as she tips the wide-mouthed cup of the espresso forward in her non-dominant hand. Stepping ever closer and settling right behind her, Ethan leans his head down until it practically rests on her shoulder, her back to his chest, and brings a hand forward to steady her grip.

At the contact, the warmth of her skin spreads through his fingers, scalding in a way that wasn’t entirely unpleasant.

This close to her he can hear the intake of breath, the slight shudder in her voice as she continues, concentrating on the feeling of his hand and the milk as it spills into the espresso.

Morning light grows warmer as the sun rises up higher in the sky, and Ethan loses track of time as he watches Nina pour the foam, successfully forming an asymmetrical flower. The minute she finishes with the last drop, the barista sets the pitcher down, staring wide eyed at her work.

Turning her head slowly, she fixes her stare on him, a look of utter disbelief on her face, “...I did it.”

Ethan’s lips quirk and he nods once, “You did.”

There’s a pause as it sinks in.

“...Oh my god! I did it!” Elated, Nina leaps towards Ethan, throwing her arms around him in a bone-crushing hug.

“Oof,” He braces himself at the force of her knocking into him. Letting out a snort, Ethan finds himself chuckling at the brunette’s joy, a small feeling of pride spreading through his chest, having spent all day trying to get to this point.

The moment lingers, Nina’s arms still wrapped around Ethan’s broader frame, the thumping of her heart beating against his rib cage. In a tiny, slightly muffled voice, “Thank you.”

Tilting her head up at him, she awards him with a gentle smile, the softness of her face accentuated by the tender curl of her lips, “Seriously. It was thanks to your help today. Guess you really are a good teacher,” Nina quips, a levity about her now that made it difficult for him to look away.

Ethan smirks, “Of course I am. I’m good at everything.”

The barista rolls her eyes all the way up to the ceiling, “Glad to see you’ve got a strong ego.”

“Was it not earned?”

“...Okay yes, but it doesn’t mean you have to be annoying about it,” She grumbles, lips forming a pout.

It takes Ethan another minute to realize that neither of them had moved, the both of them still wrapped around each other. The warmth of her skin bleeding through his shirt, the faint apple scent of her hair tickling his nose once more and he unconsciously leans down.

Nina’s eyelids flutter as she moves towards him, and soon he’s close enough that he can count every speck of caramel in the brown pools of her eyes. The pink of her lips. The small shudder of her breath. Every second that ticks by is another he’s falling...Wait, what?

Ethan jolts, his thoughts crashing to a stop, his entire body tensing. Sensing the change of mood, Nina halts as well, pulling back slightly to look at him, brows furrowed in concern, “Are you alright, Ethan?”

No. He doesn’t respond as he starts extricating himself from her grasp, peeling away from her. The groove in between her eyebrows deepen as Ethan hurries to place some distance between them.

There’s another moment of silence that blankets over them, but this one is different. It’s tense, making Ethan’s gut churn a little.

“...Did I...is something wrong?”

Unable to meet her eyes, he holds back a grimace, hearing a tremble of hurt in her voice as she asks. He stays silent for another beat before glancing in her direction, not meeting her gaze, “No, it’s just. It’s...I gotta go. My shift starts soon.”

Not waiting for a reply, Ethan yanks off his apron, roughly throwing back onto the rack before hastily grabbing his white coat and rushing out the door, never once turning back to look at the barista, whose eyes never left his back as he briskly walked off back to the hospital.      

-------------------

Day 5

“You’re still here, Ethan?”

At the sound of the voice, Ethan looks up from a patient’s x-rays he’d been examining, finding his colleague, Dr. Baz Mirani, standing in the doorway of his office.

Throwing a quick glance at the wall clock, it read 11:54 p.m.

Damn. It’s this late already? He’d completely lost track of time.

Rubbing a tired hand over his chin, Ethan releases a sigh before packing up his things, and leaving his office for the night, brushing past Baz on the way out. He wasn’t going to be able to do much more tonight.

A full effect of autumn had taken root and blanketed across the town in the past month. Stepping out in the night, Ethan lifted up his face, the scent of the fall leaves and cool evening air caressing the tip of his nose. As he moved closer to his car, a restlessness buzzed under his skin and he was unable to shake it no matter how much he tried.

He’d been feeling this way for about a month now. Ever since then.

A flicker of brown eyes and soft smiles crosses his mind and a gnawing apprehension sits in his throat, one that feels suspiciously like guilt. Guilt and...something else Ethan doesn’t want to define yet.

Sighing once more into the autumn night, he reaches his car door, ready to go home to his bottle of scotch waiting for him. The feeling continues to nip at him though, and he pauses when reaching for the handle of his car, the weight in his backpocket feeling much, much heavier.  

Maybe...He suddenly...felt an urge for some coffee.

Before he could talk himself out of it (this is a bad idea), he leaves behind his car and takes off in the direction of the coffeeshop, his footsteps slow and effortful.

The lights are still on when he reaches Derry Roasters, the blinds of the windows all pulled down save for two that overlook the counter. His eyes immediately land on the barista, sweeping away at the floor on the other side of the register, expression tight and disappointed.

The guilt started to creep back in at the look on her face.

This really was a bad idea. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to talk to her yet, after his abrupt exit last time. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever be ready, but he certainly wasn’t today.

Backtracking, Ethan began turning back in the direction from which he came, but the movement catches her eye and right away, Nina glances up, brown eyes connecting with blue ones. Ah shit.

Seeing him, the barista’s expression tightens a fraction more, a cool gleam flashing across her eyes, and she frowns before beckoning him to come in with a quick nod of her head.

A weary sigh leaves his lips as Ethan ambles over, the ding of the bell ringing out like it was announcing his execution. The minute he walks in, Nina folds her arms across her chest, still wearing her black apron over the pale blue sweater she donned today.

“Did you need something?” She asks after a long, tense moment.

He doesn’t reply, the lump in his throat growing as he hears the familiar line, ones uttered by him not too long ago. The circumstances in which they were said so different.  

She presses forward when he doesn’t speak, “You haven't been around much lately.” It sounds a little like an accusation.

“My coffee machine’s working again. So I didn’t really need to come here anymore,” He tries to hold back a grimace at how calloused he sounds.

Nina’s frown morphs into a glare and Ethan’s sure he’d rather be toughing it out in the Amazon right now than having to be the object of this woman’s current woe and ire. He’d rather be anywhere else.

He regrettably continues to dig his own grave, “There wasn’t much else this place could offer since I could just get coffee from my office now,” Why the fuck-  

“Well sorry I don’t have much to offer a world renown doctor,” A tinge of bitterness laced in her tone and he holds back a wince.

It was strange how easy it was for him to deal with the people at the hospital, never finding any need to mince words with idiots with fat pockets, and vultures trying to increase their profits at the expense of others. With his patients, always doing his best to be honest with them as they faced their own battles everyday, fighting for their lives. But here, in front of this woman who miffed him and intrigued him to no end, Ethan always found himself hesitating and clumsy with his words.

He stays quiet for too long and his silence, his lack of anything annoys her.

“You really are a cactus,” Nina mumbles, tightening her grip on the broom, keeping her eyes trained to the ground.

Taking a steadying breath, the barista glares pointedly at the crack in the floor before speaking up again, “You’re always like this, you know. I’ve talked to you like five times, and even I can tell you what you’re like.”

He doesn’t speak, the tension in the air making it difficult for him to cut through, his throat closing.

Nina holds up her hand, dainty fingers curled into a fist before she begins counting, “You always have to be sarcastic or ironic about something,” She lifts up a finger, “You’re always grumpy and kind of an asshole,” She puts up another finger, “You’re so closed off it’s sometimes so hard to talk to you because I have no idea what you’re thinking,” She pauses, ticking off another finger as the edge of her glare starts to fade, “...You never say what you mean. You’re so emotionally constipated and you make a habit of running away. You can’t just admit you like something and you always have to find a roundabout way to-”

During her tirade, Ethan had inched closer to her, slipping out what he had hidden in his back pocket. In one swift motion, he presents it to her, shoving it right under her nose and effectively cutting her off mid-rant.

Nina blinks, staring down at the trinket. A small frog keychain sits in the palm of his hand, the plush material appearing velvety under the beam of the ceiling light.  

“...What?”

His other hand reaches up to scratch the back of his neck as she peers up at him, wide-eyed and confused at the gesture, “I saw it a while ago. I don’t know why I thought of you but I bought it.” He nods at the pin clipped dutifully on her apron, right next to her name tag.

A long stretch of silence envelopes them and Ethan’s not sure what to classify this one. It didn’t feel comfortable nor was it tense like before. The brunette continued to stare at the item in his hand before gingerly, almost shyly taking it into her hands, rolling it a bit between her fingers.

After another long moment, she speaks up, “My brother...always liked frogs,” Voice airy, she keeps her eyes on the plush and continues, “He got sick a lot, and they always made him feel better. So I would always be wearing them and bringing them to him whenever he got sick again.” Nina glances up at him finally and he notices her eyes glistening with emotion.

“He’s alright now, but I guess old habits die hard. I’ve grown attached to frogs myself,” She chuckles.

Ethan watches her, blue eyes lingering on her frame before finding his voice again, “I’m glad your brother is fine now. You’re a wonderful sister.”

Nina remains quiet, eyes still fixed on the gift and Ethan’s not sure why he feels the need to keep going, “I found it in the gift shop at the hospital.”

There’s another pause as Nina freezes again. As the seconds stretch on, Ethan’s worried he overstepped. Maybe don’t tell her that. Preparing to backtrack and excuse himself from this scenario, he readies an apology on his lips, when he’s interrupted by the sound of a snort.          

She’s...laughing?

Bemusement takes over his face as he blinks, watching as the barista starts curling over, laugh growing in intensity and volume. One peek at his face and she’s launched into another fit.  

Nina continues to laugh, her body shaking as the amusement runs through her small frame. Ethan stands there silently, not sure what he should be doing as the barista keeps giggling, hand clutching the keychain tight in her grip.

Finally, after what feels like ages, Nina’s laughter subsides, fixing her posture and settling her gaze on him, something that Ethan can’t define sparkling in her eyes.

A fond sigh leaves her lips as she regards him, “You make it hard to stay mad,” She lets out, voice delicate like a whisper.  

Nina links her hands behind her back, expression happy and radiant, and he can’t seem to tear his eyes away from her. In his daze, he doesn’t notice her moving, approaching quicker than he has time to form a coherent thought.

Nina practically skips towards him, closing the distance between them. Ethan almost reflexively took a step back, the sudden proximity shocking him speechless as he catches the caramel flecks in her eyes, sparkling and utterly captivating.

“So,” Drawing out the one syllable, Nina’s eyes crinkle into those familiar crescent moons, as she lifts herself up on her tiptoes and leans towards him, noses almost touching. Ethan finds himself rooted to the spot, completely at a loss before her as her eyes reflect like stars.  

“Are you gonna ask me on a date or what?”  

Fin.

taglist: @openheart12 @ethandaddyramsey @noboundariesplease @drethanramslay @ethanramseysgirl @senseofduties @messrprongs @x-kyne-x @ethxnrxmsey​ @newcolonies​ @choices-love-affair​ @sekizincimektup​ @nooruleman​ @fightingtheinevitable​ @kaavyaethanramsey @agent-breakdance​ @blueacacias​ @edith-eggs1​  

[pandas-pandemonium]

Yandere! Sentient! Twst - Player considers deleting the game due to glitches (Dorm Leaders)

A/N: Thought I'd combine these three asks since they're all quite similar in nature.

"[Name], I really think you should just delete that game off your phone."

The sternness in your partner's voice stunned you. They had mentioned the game acting strange at times, but this was the first time they had confronted you on this issue. Confused, you spoke up.

"Is this about the weird glitches again, [S/O]?" you asked.

"Yes, this is about those weird glitches. I swear, this isn't some simple bug or anything. This is another thing entirely. A game character doesn't curse at you just for opening the app. Shouldn't it be some welcome line or something?"

You frowned.

"I've never heard anything like that..." you said.

They sighed and shook their head. "It only happens when I open the app when you ask me to help you login."

You felt a chill run down your back.

"There's...no way, right?" you said, as you slowly unlocked your phone, immediately clicking on the application. You had to see it for your own, even though deep down you knew [s/o] was right. The game had been acting strange. Comments that were way too specific, the occasional glitching when you switched out a character for another.

With wary eyes you glanced at the opening screen; one more check, one more log in and if anything weird happens again, you will have to delete it. Sentimentality and story progress be damned. You could always watch videos on YouTube anyway.

Riddle

Livid. Riddle would be absolutely livid to hear the suggestion of you deleting the game.

"How DARE they! How insolent! They think know so much better, now do they?!"

Storming around, Riddle would be figuring out how to "chop off" your significant other's head. He won't have it!

He's put up with the fact that you're in a relationship because he convinced himself it wouldn't last long, but now this is the last straw.

"They're trying to cut me off from [Name]! For that, they WILL pay!"

But first, he has to make sure things run smoothly.

You won't delete the game if nothing odd happens...

With that, [s/o] will just look like a liar. How awful!

Once Riddle's calmed down, he will start creating a plan to cut your s/o out of your life, forever.

"I simply will not tolerate a rule breaker, and it so happens, Rule #444 states that "the heads of liars must be chopped off by midnight". That's really too bad, isn't it, [s/o's name]?"

Leona

What's this? You're actually listening to your partner and now you want to delete the game?

He would love to see you try

Sure, he could sit back and pretend that the game is all fine and dandy so that you'll think your partner was lying and being petty, but that's boring, even if it is the easier way

You forget, he's the dorm leader of Savannaclaw; known for his drive to do what it takes to get his way

Don't you remember his plan from Chapter 2?

How offensive. [s/o name] is definitely taking way too much of your time if you managed to forget his role in the story

"You want to delete the app, do you? Then try it, herbivore. I'm sure you love what I've done to your phone."

Leona is smart, dangerously so. Whoever knew Savannaclaw's dorm leader was so well-versed with game code?

Azul

What?! You're going to delete the game?!

Panic surges through Azul as he combs through various alternate plans; it's okay, he's considered this possibility before

All he needs to do is craft a perfect plan to keep you from deleting the application, and to get that pesky human away from you!

It should be simple enough, but his fear clouds his judgment

Right, right! He has to address the immediate concern; that you were going to delete if you sensed something amiss again in the app

That's simple enough.

As long as he plays by the rules and keeps to the "character" the game developers originally intended, he'll be able to delay you, just by a few days

With a practiced smile, and lines that fit perfectly to script, he laughs to himself quietly;

Yes, you seem to be confused for nothing is out of place!

He may have to keep up this constricting act for now, but his plan has to be perfect if he's going to capture you.

Kalim

Oh, the poor boy

He's panicking! His mind is all over the place the moment he heard your words!

Thankfully Jamil is there to set him straight

"Act normal" Jamil instructed him.

Easier said than done, especially when it comes to someone as jumpy and excitable as Kalim

Kalim tries not to laugh a little too loudly or make remarks that shouldn't be in his lines, but it's so hard!

He wants to yell out, "You can't! You can't leave me!"

But his fear of you realizing that the game is no longer working as it should overpowers his desire to call out to you

It's so hard...

Maybe tomorrow he can tell you how he feels! You're sure to have calmed down by then!

Vil

Really now?

You were going to delete the game all because someone told you to? You're willing to sacrifice all that hard work raising his everyone's cards and throw them all away?

Preposterous!

He will not let even your finger touch the uninstall button! Ever.

Gaining sentience was a dream come true!

He too, had been working behind the scenes to find ways to bring you into this world.

Your lover? You mean that useless potato scrap that thinks they know better?

They mean nothing to Vil. After all, surely you would choose a queen over some peasant?

Idia

Strangely enough, he's not too worried.

Seriously, gaining Fourth Wall breaking sentience was like something out of an anime or a game!

This is his realm! You can't possibly do anything to it when he's tampered so much with the game code!

Try it!

You'll find your game uninstallable and registered as a default application for your phone!

Idia feels a little too proud of himself for forseeing this possibility. He's never been so prepared in his life!

"Hihihi, it's all in place! So what if the game continues glitching? You can't do anything about it! Hihihi, who would have thought even some shut-in nobody freak like me can do cool things!"

But right- he almost forgot about your partner...

How annoying. Game code he can deal with, but some irl person? No way...

"Ahh, what a pain... I need to hurry up with the program...then maybe you can leave that dumb normie behind..."

Malleus

You want to delete the game because it's acting weird, you say?

Malleus is disappointed; he was hoping he could enjoy your presence and watching you go about your daily life for a little longer.

It's alright though, he just has to speed things up a bit!

He could care less about you deleting the game;

With Lilia's help, he's found a way to creep in to your phone and has since been existing as an undetectable character within several other applications.

A little longer and he's completely certain his magic will be able to transport into your world.

How exciting!

When he does, he hopes you will celebrate with him as well.

If you won't invite him to your world... well, he'll just have to invite himself, wouldn't he?

[s4kasaki]

Hi hi! I just want to say out of the bat, that I love the aesthetic of your blog and your writing! Both are super nice and I love everything (such eye candy seriously *-*)

On another note, I would love to request some writing! This might be a somewhat odd request- but I’ll throw it out here anyways. May I request Shu dealing with an s/o that suffers a sort of body dissociation? Like sometimes they might feel like parts of their body isn’s theirs? Its a bit hard to explain but- all-in-all just Shu maybe comforting his s/o.

I hope this isn’t too much! Feel free to reject if it wasn’t clear enough-! Thanks in advance!

okay first: thank you so much?!! I'm so glad my page looks well enough to attract people to come over and have a read, request or chat! but onto the request! i hope I've written this situation properly ! If I didn't feel free to request again or leave some commentary. ★

♡ — shu | comforting his s/o after dissociating.

‣ tws/cws: dysphoria, childhood trauma (?)

‣ reader: gender neutral - they/them

‣ author's note: I hope this is well-written as for the situation way more than the fact shu is OVERLY ooc I feel like... >.< ( this is where shu isn't aware of this problem, this is his first-time really seeing this happen with you, and you both talk it through with a tat bit of comfort at the end ^^ )

You were hidden in the theater room, making sure to not move around too much where you could be heard and found. hoping that no one would see or hear you as you felt yourself slip into a dissociative state. you have never been fully caught in one, you wouldn't want to be. “You're okay. you're okay,” you lied to yourself while you tried to pay no scrutiny to another student referring to you as a (male/female) to your face and others for the last week. it echoes, it fucking echoes through your head. An uncomfortable knot in your chest grew and it wasn't gonna stop anytime soon by the looks of it-- the thoughts of those comments they had said whenever you were to dare interfere with fans' talk with their idol, grew louder in your head, drowning out your conscience.

You hugged yourself as tightly as you could as you felt tears well up in your eyes. No, you weren't hugging yourself. More like trying to rip yourself apart but not having the strength to do so as your dissociation turned into a breakdown. You felt like you were dethatched from your body while weighing a million pounds at the same time when a familiar voice ripped you back into reality. “(l/n) what are you doing here so late? You should be heading home, no?”

Out of all people who could walk in this very moment, it was Shu— Shu who was understanding, he has indeed seen you slip once before, but he never knew what it was that was happening. Out of all things you needed right now, was to be checked back into reality so abruptly. Your trembling stopped instantly, trying to uphold composer so he wouldn't see mid-way in your state. “Ahem, (l/n) since you're here. We might as well have a little talk, shall we? It would be rude of me can stay here not accompany you with any small talk...” he mustered up. “There hasn't been any trouble with you has there? I'd prefer not,” he walked to a table that was illuminated by a small lamp. He was weaving something, you've never actually seen him sew before but you were aware it was his skill no doubt. “No,” doing your best to keep your voice steady as you turned away from him, whipping the found blanket over your puffy red eyes.

Shu was never really good at small talk, so the silence was sharp— sharp enough to cut the air. He did care about your feelings, after all as his producer: He wouldn't mind hearing about any thoughts on your mind. “Mhm, but” he always did care about your feelings and made sure to check on you whenever you two met, stress hits like a bumper-- he'd be one to know. “You shouldn't rest on the ground as it is filthy and will get dust all over those clothes of yours. If you're chilly, I can make you a sweater that would do much better than dirtying your clothes. A lady/gentleman should never let their beauty be tainted.”

And there it was. You tensed at the word (lady/gentleman). It made you want to squirm out of your skin, and it was necessarily not what Shu was expecting you to fully react to. Yet you did, and he noticed. He tilted his head, carefully looking you over. You couldn't tell what he was thinking, but his sharp gaze made that uneasy knot in your chest duplication as tears formed back up in your eyes. you wished he would just kill you right then.

“Please stop staring at me." You tried to push away, to get up and go, but Shu pulled a hold of your arm and brandished you in place. You attempted to free yourself of his grip to no avail.

“You...” Shu's voice was soft. “... Don't like your skin, do you?” If it hadn't been for his soft tone, you would've thought he'd bash you right then in there in that room. It was the hint of uncharacteristic concern, however, it was common that he showed concern with you so that made you stop trying to get away and turn back to look at him.

He let go of your arm and slowly moved his hand to your face, gently wiping a finger to your cheek where a tear had begun to fall. You didn't mean to, but you flinched at such a tender action.

“Quite untrustworthy, am I now? you should tell me things.” Shu said with a hint of hurt.

Of course.

You've heard the many stories from Kiryu of how he has similar issues himself.

You knew little about Itsuki. You knew most about him splitting himself into Mademoiselle, and from what you had heard from Kiryu, that had its other history and effects that took a toll on him. Having a completely different soul takes your personality by 2 thirds most. Looking back and replying at one than the one that you know is him, that you know is himself, must be some other kind of hell to experience.

“Look- I just don't know how to explain it.” You finally reply. “I began T a few months ago and I thought that I was finally going to be happy in my skin, but then...” Your thoughts trailed off and your eyes roamed away from looking at Shu, anything but looking at him right now. You didn't want to start thinking about that person and dissociate all over again “, something kinda just happened.”

Shu stared at you intently for a minute before asking very seriously “Who must I need to kill for you? That foolish Tenshouin?”

You threw your head over to look at him. You lifted your hands to frantically wave them back and forth in front of you. “No no. You don't need to kill him— I mean..” You seized yourself for a split second and lowered your hands. “Don't do anything like that, it would only cause more dangers, thanks for the offer though...”

You had said a bit too much by letting 'him' slip out, confirming that there indeed was a person at fault for making you feel the way you had and Shu absolutely caught it.

“Hm, I suppose you're right...” He sighed in, speaking quietly but just as seriously as he posed a new offer to you.

‘If I can't stop this so-called man from doing such, the least I can do is comfort you.' He thought

You were kinda opposed to any kind of action that seemed was gonna come it's way, as you were just in that state, but you could not deny that It would be a hell of a lot better and reassuring than just balling up in the corner begging to die like earlier. Something about that made you chuckle humorously to yourself as you nodded “Uhm... alright?”

That answer seemed to please him as he gave an approving hum before pushing himself off the floor and standing. You continued to sit where you were on the floor, needing a bit longer to compose yourself before getting up. “I will be around to help you next time, I'll make sure of that... It's my job to take care of you is It not? And I'd hate to see you in such a sufferable state. I do plenty of that myself” he scoffed. This made you feel less queasy— he was the first caring enough to talk to you like this, let alone comfort you.

“…Hey, Shu?” You quickly asked. Before he could turn around to grab a heftier blanket that was laying among one of the theaters' chairs, most likely left from Natsume. He turned to look at you, making another humming sound, only this time more quizzical.

“Can you not... tell anyone you saw me like this. Please?”

He gave a short chuckle and nodded his head in agreement as to say: my lips are sealed— “ah, I found the leftover quilt, sit.”

I suppose I can get a little dirty for this sake

[buckyhoney-library]

nsfw alphabet, b.b

A/N: so sorry it took so long! hope you enjoy! sebastians & nomad!steve should be out sometime this week(end)!

reblogs/likes/feedback are greatly appreciated & highly encouraged

However, do NOT repost/steal ANY of my fics on my blog!

Warnings: 18+, language, smutty thoughts, sorry for any missed typos!

chris evans nsfw alphabet

A = Aftercare (What are they like after sex)

bucky takes aftercare so seriously! he makes sure that you have everything that you need and you're taken care of first. showering you in praises, holding you close, getting you water or snacks- he is at your beck and call.

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part on themselves and on their partner)

thighs. thighs. thighs. He loves laying between them with his head resting on your stomach. His fingers tracing patterns on your skin- peppering kisses on the inside. bucky's arms are hooked around them while he is giving you head, rubbing small circles on the outside.

bucky has grown to love his vibranium arm, because of how much you love it. he has changed arm usage from a weapon to a useful tool in every situation. being able to cool it and playing with temperatures, pinning you down- making sure you go nowhere- or even being able to cause it to vibrate.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum)

he loves to paint with his cum. as much as he LOVES to cum inside you and make you hold it- there is something so pretty with his cum plastered on your back or on your tummy. "you look so pretty with my cum on your thighs," bucky is especially fond of watching it drip down your breasts or leak down your thighs. bucky just stares in awe of how it glistens against your skin.

D = Dirty Secret (What do they secretly want)

he wants you to praise him. bucky lives off of praise and when you whimper how good he's making you feel or how he's such a good boy? it throws him over the edge, encouraging him to go faster and harder. he'll never ask for them, but when you start hyping him up, fuck he enters a state of nirvana.

E = Experience (Do they know what they are doing?)

1940's bucky as we all know was very experienced but after eighty years of nothing? he needs a little help regaining his confidence, but man will he practice and have no problems asking for help. he'd be a little embarrassed of cumming early or not being able to satisfy like he used too, but bucky watches porn and experiments like no tomorrow, catching up on all the new toys/techniques/positions etc.

F = Favorite Position (Self-explanatory)

bucky's favorite position would be cowgirl or where you're laying on your side, so he could hold you. cowgirl because he gets the perfect view of your body and everything about it.

with an honorable mention of missionary- but missionary with your legs in the air spread for all can see. if he's feeling a little spicy, he'll press on your lower abdomen, adding extra pressure.

G = Goofy (Are they serious during sex or goofy

BOTH. There is a time and a place for serious, rough, passionate sex (and boy does he enjoy that), but for the most part, Bucky wants you to feel good and he wants to learn- which means there will be some mishaps and failed moments, but he loves those moments just the same.

H = Hair (Are they well-groomed?)

he is well kept and clean. bucky isn't hairless, but he does make sure that everything is trimmed up and clean.

J = Jack Off (Do they masturbate?)

bucky only does when you're away or he's gone for a mission. when you're home, he has no problem telling you he's in the mood. when he does masturbate, it is to your pictures/videos you've sent or through facetime/phone calls. he doesn't watch porn unless that is the only option or he is looking for new things to try with you.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

oh boy does he have loads of kinks! bucky loves praise (receiving or giving)! during the more passionate and rough sessions, he is into degrading (but not too crazy) innocence kink. if you have met after his second sexual awakening? god, how he loves to ruin you. he loves the idea that he gets to teach you and that you're at his mercy. ice play/warming (idk what the word is) he loves when you call him sarg does this man have a filthy sarcastic mouth. dirty remarks of comments that leave his mouth- god, it's enough to you off in seconds.

L = Location (Favorite place to do it)

he is a traditional man at heart, so he loves the bedroom. bucky gets to be as loud as chooses and go as long as he wants without the fear of someone walking in or interrupting.

M = Motivation (What turns them on or gets them going?)

leggings. jeans. short shorts- anything that enhances your thighs or when you shoot back firey/witty comments matching his energy. The more traditional turn on's as well, suggestive comments, touching his chest letting it fall to his belt, lingering kisses on his lips and neck. "it's like you're begging me to fuck you silly,"

N = No (Something they will not do. Turnoffs.)

nothing with bodily fluids (other than saliva or cum) & i don't think he'd be fond of being too open in public- he's a private guy, but he doesn't mind the simple pda and light touches.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skills, etc.)

okay let me tell you- bucky loves getting head. your lips make him cum faster than anything else. "open wide, darling" he loves the ability to do it virtually anywhere (privately of course) and the quick clean up-but he mostly loves watching you take his length completely, hitting the back of your throat. "fuck, such a good girl taking all of me," hearing you moan into him and gag makes him go FERAL. bucky isn't a head pusher, but he does grip your hair.

bucky does love going down on you too. his cock throbs at the sight of your legs shaking and squirming. the sounds you make encourage him more, but he doesn't stop when you cum- he licks up every last drop of you. "im not stopping, so i'd stop moving if i were you," he'll occasionally pop his head up to make sure that he's doing everything right and you're enjoying yourself- the last thing he wants is for you to fake it (which only happened when he first re-entered the dating world)

P = Pace (Are they fast or rough? Or slow and sensual?)

there is a time and place for everything. bucky loves sensual sex because he feels the most connected to you and he has been without physical/emotional connection for so long that it's become a must. it is also where he feels the most control and the best, when he can be 100% vulnerable- something never thought he could do.

fast and rough is for those needy moments where he can't get his hands off of you- complete feral mode. when you've been teasing him relentlessly and he needs to remind you who's in charge. those nights are when the kinkiest of kinks come to play.

Q = Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than regular sex)

quickies are reserved for dinner parties, group outings, etc. where you look too good and he can't keep his hands off of you. "i wanna see if you taste as good as you look". quickies usually consist of fast rough sex that leaves bruises or marks. they also mainly consist of giving/receiving head.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

oh does he! he has almost ninety years of sex trends/toys/etc to catch up on. it will be the middle of the night and you'd be fast asleep only to be woken up by him shaking your arm and going "baby, we have to try this!"

bucky isn't a risk-taker in the sense of public and potentially getting caught, he is a risk-taker in the sense that he is willing to try anything once.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go? How long do they last?)

bub is a super-soldier. his stamina outlasts yours by HOURS. you'd be panting and lying sideways and bucky would be ready for the next round and you'd have to tap out. he would chuckle and hold you, teasing you about how you can't last. "can't handle this cock? i thought you said you could go all night?"

T = Toys (Do they own or use toys on themselves or partners?)

bucky has a whole drawer dedicated to the greatest quality toys. "only the best for you, dollface." he loves seeing how far he can push you with the vibrators. tying the vibrator to your clit and watching you be sent over the moon. bucky wouldn't be too crazy about using toys on himself, but he isn't opposed to being handcuffed (or pegged)

U = Unfair (How much do they like to tease?)

BIGGEST TEASE in the galaxy. Touching you, grazing your heat, kissing your neck, rubbing the inside of your thigh, (stuffing a vibrator inside you while you're on the phone), or whispering dirty things in your ear- but God forbid if you tease him back. there will be hell to pay if you try teasing him back. "you better rethink your next move, darling," "i think you forgot who's allowed to tease who."

V = Volume (How loud are they? What sounds do they make?)

bucky is pretty quiet, with the exceptions of grunts and whimpers. His mouth is filthy and he dirty talks like there is no tomorrow! he is also a cocky little shit and sarcastic- which doesn't stop in the bedroom. "your cunt feel so good around me," "open your eyes, i want you to watch as i ruin you" "look at you, you're soaked for me"

W = Wildcard (Random headcanon for your character)

cockwarming. babe lives for cockwarming. early morning lazy sex, but too lazy to pull out of you. you'd be laying on your side with your leg over his, with his cock buried inside of you. "no, honey, just stay" he would mumble with his head resting in the cook of your neck, placing small kisses on your neck, but falling back asleep.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)

baby, that serum did wonders. bucky is packing that seven to eighter. his cock would poke through your tummy and he won't stop talking about it for weeks.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

HIGH. VERY HIGH. he is ready whenever and wherever the time calls.

Z = ZZZ (How quickly do they fall asleep afterward?)

bucky's stamina is so high that he probably is starving. he would perform aftercare for you, but once you'd have cared for- he is standing naked in the kitchen making a sandwich.