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intheticklecloset · 9 months

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Black Clover Coffee Shots #1-10

A collection of the Black Clover Coffee Shots I've done, compiled for the sake of ease. These are all stand-alone stories.

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1) Lee Asta, Ler Yuno

“You’re faking.”

The words were blunt, on point, and totally unexpected. Asta looked up at Yuno in surprise. “What?”

“You heard me.” Yuno plopped down beside him on the log, staring into the fire along with him. “You pretend a lot, but you can’t get it past me when you’re really hurting, you know.”

Asta frowned. “Get what past you? I’m not hiding—”

Yuno turned and looked at him. Hard.

“…fine.” The magicless boy huffed out a sigh. “But it’s not like it gets to me all the time.”

“I know. But it’s getting to you now.”

“Whatever.” Asta got to his feet. “I’ll sleep it off and be fine by morning.”

Yuno grabbed his arm and pulled him right back down. “Uh, no. We’re going to make sure you go to bed feeling better, not wait for sunshine to cure you.”

“Yeah? And what’s your bright idea for how to do that, genius? You’re the one who has all the crazy powerful magic, after all. Not me.”

Yuno felt the words stab him a little, though he knew they weren’t meant to be mean against him specifically. Asta – for all of his brazen bravado and never-give-up attitude – did have rare moments of being truly upset by the fact that he’d never manifested any kind of magical power at all. Put him beside Yuno, who seemed to have everything, and well…it could be a lot sometimes.

But Yuno was not going to let his friend stay down in the dumps. Especially now that he’d gotten a Grimoire just like he always wanted and proved himself to be just as worthy as anyone else.

“Easy,” he said now, reaching out to pull Asta into his chest, wrapping his arms around him. “Like this.”

“Are you hugging me? Ah! Ahahahaha wait, nohohohoho!” As expected, Asta began laughing and struggling immediately, forcing Yuno to tighten his grip to ensure he wouldn’t wriggle away. “That’s cheheheheheating! Dohohohohon’t!”

The taller boy smiled a little, continuing to tickle his ribs and sides playfully. “Not cheating. This is a perfectly valid form of cheering up. Besides, you use it against me all the time when you can’t win any other way.”

“Exahahahahahactly! Quit tahahahahaking my one tahahahalent away from me! YIEE!!” Asta tossed his head back and barked out a shrieking laugh when Yuno drilled into his belly. “YUNO!! Nohohohohohohohoho! Not thehehehehehehere!”

Yuno chuckled into his ear, and Asta hated to admit it, but between the playful torture and the love he could feel radiating from his friend, he was beginning to feel a little better. Still…

“You thihihihihink you’ll gehehehehehet away with thihihihihihis?! I’ll gehehehehet you back twihihihihihice as bad, Yunohohohohoho!”

Yuno smirked. “Looks like your fighting spirit is back, Asta.”

2) Lee Noelle, Ler Asta

One of these days Asta really was going to get himself killed, but thanks to Noelle’s quick thinking, today was not that day.

“Idiot!” she fumed, heart racing frantically at how close of a call that had been.

They were outside the Black Bulls base, practicing together. Noelle’s magic still needed some fine-tuning, and Asta had wanted to practice deflecting attacks that were random and strong. It had all been going all right until one of her spells went totally awry and she’d had to grab his arm to maneuver his magic-cancelling sword at the giant ball of water that was careening toward him from high above.

Asta was undeterred, however, jumping up and down excitedly. “Whoa, that was great, Noelle!”

“It was not great!” she spat back, trying to fight down her panic. “I could have killed you! This was a bad idea. We shouldn’t be doing this in the first place. You could have gotten—”

Arms wrapped around her, holding her steady and close, cutting off the rest of her speech.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he told her gently, seriously. “It takes more than that to scare me off. You know that.”

Noelle flushed scarlet at the kind gesture, trying to shove him away. “L-Let me go, Dorksta! Get your commoner hands off of m-mehehehehe! Hey!” Suddenly giggles were bubbling up in her throat beyond her control. It took her a moment to realize one of his hands had left her back to start scribbling across her belly. “Dorkstahahahaha! Quit thahahahat!”

“Relax! You’re more in control than you think you are.” Asta beamed at her. “Hey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile so big before! It looks good on you.”

Noelle twisted so her back was to him, trying to hide her face, but now both his hands were tickling her tummy, making her squeal and wiggle and laugh in his arms. Her wand dropped to the ground in the tussle, though she hardly noticed.

“Ahahahahahasta!” she pleaded, desperately trying to fight back a snort. She was a princess! She didn’t—

Asta gasped excitedly. “Did you just snort?! Oh man! You must be really ticklish here, huh, Noelle?”

They never did get back to training that day.

3) Lee Asta, Ler Noelle

Noelle had no idea where she’d gotten the courage to do what she was currently doing, but she was doing it now, so she might as well see it through, right?

Asta squawked and curled in on himself, giggling hysterically as her fingers kneaded his sides, trying to get around to his stomach – a near impossible task when she was behind him and his back was to her.

“Noelle! Cuhuhuhuhut it out!” he cried, grabbing onto her fingers more gently than she’d have anticipated given his circumstances.

“No way, dorksta!” she shot back, trying instead to worm up into an armpit. “You deserve this for being a total idiot!”

Asta yelped and clamped his arm to his side, still trying to wiggle away from her. “Buhuhuhut it wohohohohorked, didn’t ihihihit?!”

“That’s no excuse for you to rush into every battle without thinking it through first! You could have died!” Noelle finally managed to get one hand around to his belly, digging in with more ferocity now that she was remembering what had spurred her to attack him in the first place.

“Ahahahahahahahaha! W-Wahahahahait, Noelle!” Asta shrieked, finally twisting around to face her, his bright smile and pink cheeks making her heart flip in her chest even as he begged, “Nohohohot thehehehehehere! Please, Noehehehehehelle!”

She smiled despite herself, blushing at the adorable figure before her. Asta could be an idiot sometimes, for sure, but she knew that at heart he had nothing but the best intentions and the greatest of love for everyone he swung that anti-magic sword for.

So really, if any kind of punishment was in order, it was this kind. Gentle but ruthless, just like he was.

“Noelle, stahahahahahahap!”

“Tch, why should I?” she snapped, though she was still smiling. Good thing he was too distracted to notice. “Maybe this will teach you to rush into every fight without thinking, dorksta!”

4) Lee Yuno, Ler Asta

“You know what the best part about having an anti-magic sword is?” Asta asked Yuno out of nowhere one afternoon. They were visiting Hage Village and had decided to take a walk around, so it was just the two of them when the shorter boy spoke up.

Yuno gave him a smirk. “You don’t die when wizards are trying to kill you?”

Asta rolled his eyes. “Ha-ha. That’s definitely nice, but nope! It’s something else.”

“Do tell.”

“It means you can’t overpower me all the time anymore!”

“I don’t know about that.”

Asta humphed. “It does! Here, fight me. I’ll prove it!”

Yuno watched him summon his sword from his dark grimoire with a blank expression, making no move to call his own magic to the surface. “Asta.”

“What?”

“Don’t be an idiot.”

“What?!” Asta stomped his foot and raised his sword. “I can match you now! Come on, Yuno!”

The darker haired boy barely raised his hand, and a strong gust of wind flew at his friend. Asta had always been unfazed by this attack before, but now he met it with a different type of confidence. He raised his weapon and sliced right through the wind as if it were paper, then charged forward.

Yuno was surprised to find himself having fun actually being able to spar with Asta now without fear of hurting him anymore. He’d always had to hold back, but now he didn’t need to. It was refreshing. He got so caught up in it, in fact, that he didn’t realize his friend’s ulterior motives until it was too late.

With one final swing of his weapon, Asta cut through Yuno’s offense and tackled him to the ground. They landed with a thud on the grass, but before Yuno could move, he felt fingers deep in his sides and he let out a squeaky yelp before dissolving into giggles.

“W-Wahahahahait! Asta!”

“See? Now that I have anti-magic, you can’t keep me from tickling you silly anymore!”

Yuno’s eyes widened. “You ihihihihihidiot! Thahahahahat’s what this was fohohohohor?!”

“Of course! Now, let’s see…” Asta grinned wickedly and sat on his arms to pin them down before going for his neck. “This was the spot, right?”

“AHAHAHAHAHASTA!!” Yuno shrieked with laughter, kicking his legs uselessly as his friend beamed down at him. “PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE!!”

“That’s right, Yuno,” Asta cackled along with him. “Your magic can’t protect you from my tickly wrath anymore! I have a lot of lost time to make up for, so I hope you’re ready~”

Yuno was laughing for a long time that afternoon.

5) Lee Magna, Ler Luck

Luck was – for lack of a better word – completely and totally crazy.

And Magna was currently laughing his guts out, though he’d be lying if he said it didn’t honestly feel so good to do it. He hadn’t laughed like this in a long time.

But still…

“Luhuhuhuhuhuhuhuck, stahahahahahahap it!” he demanded through his hysterics, kicking his legs uselessly in the air behind his friend, who was currently straddling him, beaming down at him, and digging ruthlessly into his lower ribs.

“But you didn’t wanna fight me,” Luck returned with a playful whine. “So I have to convince you somehow!”

“All yohohohohohohou’re dohohohohoing is weheheheheakening me!” Magna pleaded, grasping Luck’s wrists and desperately trying to push him away to no avail. The little blonde sure could be strong when he wanted to! “I wohohohohon’t be ahahahahable to fihihihihight if you keheheheheheep going!”

“Then give up, and let’s spar!”

Ah, the crux of the problem. Magna didn’t want to fight; that’s what had gotten him here. But he didn’t want to keep getting tickled, either!

“Luhuhuhuhuhuck!”

“Wanna keep going, then? All right!” Luck giggled along with him and moved as though to wiggle into his underarms.

Magna instantly clamped his arms to his sides. “Nohohohohoho!”

“Open up, Magna!” Luck teased, easily lifting one arm above him and digging into the exposed armpit the instant it was available. Magna screamed, and Luck nearly lost his balance, laughing excitedly. “Ooh, this spot makes you go wild, doesn’t it?”

“GAHAHAHAHAHA STAHAHAHAHAHAHAP!!” Magna begged, squirming and kicking and laughing himself hoarse. “PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE, LUCK!!”

Nearby, Asta blinked at the unusual situation, not at all phased but slightly confused. “So…what happens if he gives up but can’t actually fight?”

Vanessa took a swig from her wine bottle and shrugged. “Then Magna keeps getting the snot tickled out of him. Luck is ruthless when he’s in a fighting mood.”

Going by the loud pleas for mercy falling from Magna’s lips at this point, Asta was more than inclined to believe her.

6) Lee Finral, Ler Noelle

Finral was scared of the dark.

There, he’d said it. Or, thought it.

There were a lot of things that terrified him, if he was honest – being alone, being useless, risking his life in battle – but the dark was a different kind of scary. He could handle being alone. He was used to feeling useless and risking his life in the Black Bulls. But the dark was unpredictable. Anything could happen, and that’s what made it so terrifying.

Someone poked his shoulder, and Finral let out a scream, flailing his arms wildly at whoever was nearby.

“Ow, ow! Finral!” Noelle snapped at him from somewhere on his right, catching his wrist in her hand. “It’s me, you idiot!”

“Sorry! I’m sorry,” he stammered, trembling as his eyes darted around, trying to find any kind of light source to latch onto. “I’d never hit a lady, much less a princess – I’m sorry!”

Noelle let out a huff, but her voice was gentler when she asked, “Are you okay?”

“S-Sure! It’s just a blackout, right? Haha…”

Her grip on his arm loosened, but she didn’t let go. Didn’t let him be alone. He loved her for that.

“You’re scared of the dark, aren’t you?”

Finral swallowed nervously, but he knew he couldn’t lie. She had to feel him trembling by now. “I…y-yeah, I…I can’t help it.”

“You commoners are so pathetic,” she muttered, but she pulled him closer anyway, her side pressed against his. “Fine, I’ll stay with you until someone remembers they have fire magic.”

It was only then that he remembered they weren’t alone. The rest of the Bulls could be heard scrambling about, bumping into each other and muttering curses. It was comforting to know they were all still nearby, even if he couldn’t see them.

“Thank you, Noelle,” he murmured. “I’m…I’m sorry.”

“Quit apologizing,” she grumbled, and this time the poke jabbed his ribs. He yelped, scooting away from her instinctively, and suddenly the silence was very obvious.

“N-Noelle?”

Fingers in his ribs, laughter bubbling up out of him before he could stop it, a firm grip on him even as he tried to squirm away. “W-Wahahahait, Noehehehehelle! Nohohohohoho! It tihihihihickles!”

“Good,” she said decisively, though there was an undercurrent of amusement in her tone as well. “You can make yourself useful by brightening up the place with your giggles.”

All of a sudden, Finral was grateful for the dark. As long as it was pitch black, no one could see him blushing and smiling at her teasing words.

7) Lee William, Ler Yami

“You want to be a stick in the mud? Fine. I have other ways of making you laugh.”

William turned around with a disinterested, “Hm?” seconds before Yami descended, grabbing him around the waist and digging his thumbs into his hips and fingers into his ribs.

“Ah! W-Whahahahat are you—?! Yahahahahahami!” William squealed, arms shooting down to try and pry him away. It was all useless, of course. Yami was bigger and stronger than he was in nearly every respect; he wasn’t getting out of this now and he knew it.

“There’s that laugh,” Yami grumbled good-naturedly, easily picking him up off the ground and hugging him close, fingers still tickling mercilessly. “Y’know, if you’d even just smiled at one of my jokes, I wouldn’t have to do this to you, golden boy.”

William could only laugh and struggle, trapped as he was in his rival’s hold. “Stahahahahahahap! Yahahahahahami, stahahahahahap it!”

Yami smirked. “Why should I? It’s good to see you smiling like that.”

“Plehehehehease, Yami! I cahahahahahan’t – ahahahahahaha!”

“Ooh, got a soft spot right here, eh?” Yami teased, shifting his grip so he could hold onto William with one hand and pinch at his hip with the other. “Careful, or your mask might fall off.”

“I dohohohohohohon’t cahahahahahare! Just plehehehehehehease!” William screeched, laughter bordering on hysteria the longer his hips were poked and prodded. He gave up trying to pry Yami away and instead started pounding on his chest in desperation. He’d never minded being on the shorter side, but right now it was only helping his rival take him down, and he hated that he felt so helpless. “Plehehehehease, stop, Yahahahahahami! Please, I beheheheheg you!”

“All right, all right. Guess I got what I wanted, anyway,” Yami relented, gently setting him back on his feet, making sure he wouldn’t immediately topple over before letting go. “There, see? Don’t you feel much better now, grumpy?”

William shivered, keeping his back turned on his friend as he tried to rein his uncontrollable smile back in somewhat. He didn’t want to admit it lest Yami decide this was a good way to get what he wanted all the time, but the smaller man had to admit that yes, he did feel a lot better than he had a few minutes ago.

“I appreciate you heeding my cries for mercy,” he said at last, daring a smile over his shoulder at the taller man. “Perhaps you’re not as ruthless as I believed you to be.”

Yami’s eyes darkened, and William knew he was in trouble even before his friend’s Grimoire appeared beside him. He took off at full sprint, but he knew it would be useless. He’d be caught either by Yami’s dark magic or the man himself, but either way, he wasn’t entirely unprepared to face the consequences.

He could use a bit more cheering up, after all.

8) Lee Finral, Ler Vanessa

“Hold still, Finral!” Vanessa laughed, chasing after the boy as he tried to roll away from her tickling fingers, cackling into the floor. One hand shakily reached back to try and grab her while the other clenched into a fist that pounded the ground.

“Cahahahahahan’t hehehehehehelp it!” Finral whined back. He let out a yelp when she suddenly flipped him onto his back and straddled his waist, making his eyes widen and blush darken. She latched onto his lower ribs and dug in ruthlessly, and he tossed his head back with a shriek, hands loosely grasped around her wrists. “Stahahahahahahahap!”

“Aww, but I just got started~” she teased, reaching one hand up to scribble against his neck. She grinned at his resulting squeak and scrunched shoulders. “You’re cute like this, Finral.”

“I’m nohohohohohohot!” he protested, then tried to wind it back by saying, “Wehehehehell, I mehehehehean, if you thihihihihink I’m cuhuhuhuhute, I guess thahahahahat’s okay – GAH!!”

Vanessa giggled along with him as he flailed his arms uselessly in her general direction. She’d reached behind her to grab one of his knees and squeeze, and the resulting ticklish panic on his face was well worth the risk of his potentially getting her back for this.

“Plehehehehehease, not agahahahahahain! Not thehehehehehehere!” he begged, briefly grasping her leg at one point before quickly pulling away a second later, his instinct to respect her overriding his desire to get away from her tickling.

“But I love how it makes you wiggle around like a fish out of water,” Vanessa cooed, slipping her fingers under his knee to get at the soft underside. “And hearing you laugh makes all of us happy, you know?”

Finral had his head tossed back with uncontrollable laughter at this point, but he still managed to catch what she’d said a few seconds later. “IT DOHOHOHOHOHOHOES?!”

“Of course! We like seeing you happy, sweetie.”

He blushed through his hysterics, arms flailing and legs scrabbling against the floor as much as they could in this position. Finally he settled for covering his face with his arms. “FIHIHIHIHIHINE!! I GUEHEHEHEHEHESS I CAN TAHAHAHAHAKE IT!!”

Vanessa beamed at him and used her thread magic to make him uncover his face so she could see his huge smile. “That’s our Finral.”

9) Lee Asta, Ler Yuno

“You can’t use your fancy wind magic to barrage me with snowballs!” Asta shouted indignantly as he jumped to his feet, brushing snow from his Black Bulls uniform.

Yuno stood unbothered a few paces away, a tiny smile the only physical indication he’d heard his friend. “It’s the only way I can stand my ground, you dork. The rate at which you can make and throw snowballs at me is alarming. I’m just trying to keep up.”

Asta narrowed his eyes. “I can’t tell if you’re mocking me or complimenting me.”

“Because you’re a moron.”

“So you’re mocking me!”

“I’m honestly doing both. I’m both terrified of and annoyed with you for making me use magic to win a snowball fight.”

Asta appraised his friend for a moment, but seeing that tiny smile made him feel reassured that Yuno wasn’t mad. Not really. He grinned back. “Guess I’m just that good! I have to be the best snowball fighter in the kingdom if I want to be the Wizard King!”

“Oh, that’s how it is?” Yuno chuckled, raising his Grimoire and calling up yet another gale. “Then I’m taking you down for real, because I’m going to be the Wizard King.”

Another round ensued, both boys pelting each other with snowball after snowball, both of them laughing the whole time – even the normally stoic Yuno. When the chaos died down and they took a moment to catch their breath, the Golden Dawn mage stood up straight and mumbled, “Guess I have no choice.”

“Huh?” Asta barely got the word out before he’d been tackled – physically tackled, by Yuno of all people – into the snow. He shivered violently and opened his mouth to protest, but what came out instead was a long string of giggles as his friend grabbed onto his ribs and tickled. “Ahahahahahaha hey! Yuno, dohohohohohon’t!”

“I have no choice,” Yuno repeated in a mock-saddened tone, smirking all the while. “There’s no other way to win this fight, and I have to win to become the Wizard King. Those were the stakes you set, weren’t they?”

“I wahahahahahahas johohohohohoking! Mohohohohostly!” Asta squealed, arching his back with a yelp when Yuno found his giggle spot along the sides of his belly. “Ehehehehahahahahaha Yuhuhuhuno!”

Yuno couldn’t help but grin at his friend’s hysterical, bubbly giggles, keeping up his gentle tickling pace as he said, “Well, you might not be serious, but I am. I’m going to be the Wizard King, one snowball fight and tickle fight at a time. You’re going down, Asta!”

10) Lee Finral, Ler Vanessa

Finral was nervous. He paced the living room of the Bulls’ hideout, a small box clenched in his hands. His mind was racing. What if she didn’t like it? What if it was too forward? What if she took it the wrong way and rejected him? What if—

“Hey, Finral!”

Her voice made him freeze in his tracks and whirl around to face her, hiding the box behind him. “H-Hey, Vanessa! What’s up?”

The witch smiled as she strode over to him, her keen gaze glancing at his hidden hands. “What are you so worked up about? You’ll wear a path in the floor if you keep pacing like that.”

Had she seen him? Of course she had, what was he thinking? Still, he tried to act nonchalant. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just taking a walk…inside.” He cringed; even he could hear how lame that sounded. “Because of the snow. And the wind.”

“Finral,” she said gently, “what are you hiding from me?”

“Nothing!” His reply was too quick and too loud and he knew it.

“Finral…”

“It’s nothing! Don’t worry about it, it’s just…” He hurried to shove the box into his tunic. “Nothing.”

Vanessa looked him over once, seemed to come to a conclusion, and gave him another sweet smile. “Is it something for me?”

This time, no words came to him. He stood there totally silent, gulping.

“Finral,” she teased, reaching forward to pinch his ribs and make him squeak in surprise, “just tell me what’s going on. You can trust me, right?”

“Ah! Of c-cohohohourse I truhuhuhuhust you, but – ahahahahaha, Vanessa, stohohohohohop!” Finral pleaded, giggling despite himself, squirming as she pinched and prodding along his ticklish torso.

“Then what’s the matter?”

“It’s nohohohohohohohothing! I swehehehehehear!”

“If it’s nothing, why won’t you let me see what’s in the box?”

Finral was blushing bright pink by now, the color matching his green tunic beautifully – to Vanessa, anyway. He cackled and tried pushing her away, but it was halfhearted at best. “Okahahahahay, okay, I’ll shohohohohow you! Just stahahahahahap!”

Vanessa did as she was asked and let him be, and she watched him with a smile as he shakily reached for the box he’d tried to hide earlier. After a brief moment of hesitation, he thrust it toward her and said, “Happy holidays, Vanessa.”

She blinked in surprise, taking the box and gingerly lifting the lid. Inside was a beautiful pair of silver earrings – just her color, and exactly her style. She looked back up at him. “Finral…”

“If you don’t like them, I won’t be upset,” he rushed to say, keeping his eyes averted from her. “I’m not trying to be presumptuous, I just thought of you, and—”

Vanessa pressed a kiss to his cheek, effectively shutting him up, and smiled at him again. “They’re beautiful, Finral. I love them. Thank you.”

Finral traced his fingers along the spot her lips had touched and felt himself blushing furiously, but he couldn’t hide his own return smile. “Y-You’re welcome. Happy holidays, Vanessa.”

“Happy holidays, Finral.”

#fanfiction #tickle drabbles #coffee shots #quick prompts #sentence starters #black clover #tickling #ticklish #tickle

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zombvibes · 2 years

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aight I gotta deltarune theory and since I got jack shit followers Im sending it in an ask to get it out there and since you got almost as much utdr brainrot as I do your you're the lucky host for my parasite ramblings alright here we go: I don't trust Trashy wait wait hear me out. So looking at the secret bosses so far, we seem to have a theory of abandonment going, right? Spamton's pretty explicit with being an email scammer that no one falls for, and Jevil is the joker card that often gets discarded before a card game starts. So far nothing that the fandom hasn't already figured out, no new ground being broken. Assuming that this trend follows, and knowing Toby's love for recurring themes this is definitely possible, we can expect each of the next bosses to also be abandoned things. Now lets look at Trashy. What is he? Thats right, a trash can. What could possibly be considered more abandoned, more discarded, than literal trash? The very same trash that makes up his stinky stinky innards. Now I know what you might be thinking, this is clearly a coincidence, Trashy is just a silly little joke character made to fit in with his natural environment, a garbage dump. He has a few funny little lines, and then you fuck off and he is left in the trash where he belongs, right? Its not like he does anything strange or suspicious, right? Its not like he has anything about him that makes him unique or notable, right? Right? Well if you said yes, than congratulations because you are wrong. At the end of chapter 2, when you fall into the castle town dark world, normally all the npc's that you recruited all enter the town and become new citizens. However, this doesn't happen during the snowgrave route, where everyone is either too cold or too affraid to join you, except for Queen of course. Oh, and Trashy. He is there. Somehow. Making him one of only two characters that joins castle town no matter what choices you make. The other being the central most plot relevant darkener in chapter 2. His arrival is played off as a joke, but given the general mood for the rest of the route it feels really odd and out of place. Why did Toby decide to randomly throw in a funny joke right after you essentially just finished Deltarunes genocide route? Take it away and the whole scene flows just as well, if not better. No, Toby went out of his way to make sure that we knew Trashy survived Noelles gamer girl moment, and that he was alive and well in castle town, and I for one am deeply suspicious of why. Look, am I saying that Trashy is for certain some sinister mastermind, or a future secret boss? No. But if he does turn out to be important in the future, I fucking called it.

I just wanted to let you know that I woke up to this ask @ 6am (6:00), read it and didn’t register anything. It’s currently 1pm (13:00) and I read it again and I still didn’t register everything but I, at least, understand where you’re coming from. 100% Disagree though.

However, I’m giving you and anyone else who agrees with you full permission to laugh at me in my inbox when Trashy does become important in some way shape or form.

#zomb answers #To me the most he’ll do is maybe be a part of a dojo challenge #<- I’m calling this btw if he doesn’t I’d be very sad #I wanna kick his ass!!! /joking

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radicaled · 5 years

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Noelle and I invented a mommy blogger and her family.

Nevaeh, 23, second generation mommy blogger, lives with her husband MattBrad, 36, and their two children, Sashé, 6, and Bradlington, 4, in a perpetually sun-soaked farmhouse.

Noelle: I didn’t search for 8 paragraphs about how awesome your hubby is, I searched for a crock pot black bean soup!!!!!

Me: What do you think Sashé’s gender is?

Noelle: I think....TBD

Me: I imagine Sashé watches a lot of Drag Race and cries every episode. They are very elegant, lots of scarves and femme-androgynous clothing. Like Greta! (Our friend Karen has an incredible child named Greta who has the best sense of fashion. Greta has created a style she calls “bat fashion”.)

#haaaaaahahahaha #honestly #noelle makes me laugh more than anyone else #she came up with most of this #gross love stuff

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kpopfanfictrash · 4 years

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Raise the Barre (Epilogue)

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Creative Contributor: @baebae-goodnight for the last Raise the Barre moodboard TT she nailed it

Pairing: Jimin / Reader

Rating: 18+ (Smut)

Genre: Enemies to Lovers / Dance Academy!AU

Warnings: sexual content. Dry humping, fingering, hand job, oral (female), breast play, multiple orgasms, Jimin gets turned on by making someone else come, dirty talk. Jimin’s pants are tight.

Word Count: 13,409

Summary: You and Park Jimin have been rivals for as long as you’ve known one another; ever since he tripped you in the front row of your first dance convention. When you graduate from high school and enter Russet Ballet Academy, you tell yourself you’re leaving all past quarrels behind. The main problem with this though, is that your past seems determined not to leave you alone.

Worse still, the obstacles you face while out in the real world might prove more challenging than anything your enemy has to offer.

“And… more pointe shoes,” you said, opening the box in your lap. “Wow. Thanks, mom and dad.”

Your dad laughed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “You’re welcome, kiddo,” he said, nodding from the couch. “I know Russet gives you some already, but you can never have too many.”

“Out of curiosity.” You glanced at the tree. “Are there any boxes from you which aren’t related to dance?”

“Not related to dance…” Your mom pretended to think. “I don’t understand.”

“Mom!”

She laughed. “I’m kidding! Yes, there are other presents. You just happened to pick all the pointe shoe boxes first.”

Shaking your head, you placed the box aside. You smiled though, warmth in your chest at being home for the holidays. Classes at Russet had ended a week prior and it had been nice for a few days to simply relax. Already though, you found yourself itching to return to the city. It was strange to wake every morning and not head to ballet. It was even stranger to take classes at your old studio, trying to stay in shape before second semester began.

Playing with the string of your sweatpants, you couldn’t help glancing at your phone on the couch. It had been several days since you’d last seen Jimin in person. Oddly enough, the separation had been harder than you’d thought it would be.

Immediately after ending things with Finn, you and Jimin had tried to keep your distance. The pain of your separation had been too fresh to even consider dating someone else but, as time had gone on, you and Jimin had started becoming friends again.

It was hard not to be, with Jimin continuing as your dance partner and classmate. At the end of the semester, you’d had the opportunity to switch partners, but you and Jimin had chosen the status quo. It just made sense this way; you couldn’t think of anyone else you’d trust as much as him.

At first, things between you were strictly professional. You saw him only within the confines of the dance studio but eventually, his presence bled into your normal life. At first, the outings were small. Jimin went to a pregame you also attended. He saw you once at the coffee shop and, instead of running away, he stopped to chat. One time, he walked you back to your dorm.

When the month became December, you found your outlook improving. Most of November had been spent wallowing in your dorm, but the holiday season brought with it endless activities. The very first weekend of the month, a bunch of your Russet friends decided to go ice skating and you’d ended up tagging along.

The biggest problem had been you’d never ice skated before. Noelle had been patient, skating backwards in front of you and dragging you around the rink. Jimin had done the same thing for Hoseok, who was in a similar predicament to yours, and at some point, they swapped partners and left you skating with Jimin.

When he’d taken over for Noelle, your stomach had swooped. Hands touching, he’d led you gently around the edge and the world had seemed to still. It had been the first time you’d felt anything stir outside of your break-up. Whatever hurt and distance had sprung between you, it seemed something had survived between you and Jimin.

Nose red, Jimin had smiled as he skated backwards. “It’s easy,” he’d told you. “You just swivel, Y/N. In and out, in and out. Got it?”

“Um, no!” you’d yelped, nearly crashing to the ice when Jimin let go of your hands.

He’d laughed, catching you easily and skating like that for a while. Eventually, Jimin had helped you off the rink and gotten hot chocolate, which you insisted on buying. Payback, you said, for the impromptu skating lessons.

That day had been a turning point for you both. Throughout the month prior, you’d texted sporadically but after, you seemed to talk every day.

Jimin even offered to drive you home from Russet, given the fact that your hometowns were so close together. After much hemming and hawing, you’d eventually taken him up on the offer. The savings it gave your bleeding bank account were well-worth the potential discomfort.

This had led to both the best and worst twenty-four hours of your life.

Best, because Jimin was an excellent road trip companion. He let you choose the music, laughed at all your dumb jokes, and agreed to play the road trip games you suggested. You’d already made a firm rule not to compare Jimin to any past boyfriends but couldn’t help but note this as an improvement over anyone prior.

The sole reason the twenty-four hours were also painful was because you stopped at a hotel halfway through. It was either this or drive until 3:00 AM, so you chose the smarter option and rested for the night. You and Jimin bought separate bedrooms, but they’d ended up next to one another, so you’d been forced to spend a sleepless night imagining Jimin separated from you only by a thin sheet of plywood.

You had told yourself this was silly. At Russet, Jimin hadn’t been much further away, but something about the closeness in the hotel made you nervous. It was infinitely easier to forget about boundaries when you were separated by only a car console for hours at a time. Infinitely easier to forget the rules when you were outside of Russet, cocooned by his car and the snow.

You couldn’t help but think about the one kiss you’d shared.

That had only been a taste, barely a teaser, but the memory kept you awake for more nights than it probably should have. You couldn’t help but wonder what it’d be like to kiss Jimin again, under different circumstances.

Groaning, you’d covered your face with a pillow that night and tried your best to sleep. It hadn’t really worked, and you’d shown up at the car the next morning with dark shadows beneath your eyes.

Forcing yourself back to the present, you glanced away from your phone and focused on the tree – only to see its screen light up in your peripheral. Grabbing your phone, you realized Jimin had texted. Stifling a smile, you scrolled through the conversation until you found his last message.

Jimin: MERRY CHRISTMAS! [10:23 AM]

Jimin:

Y/N: oh my god everything’s so... coordinated lol how long did that tree take to set up? [10:24 AM]

Y/N: and merry Christmas 😊 [10:24 AM]

Jimin: not long at all. I just googled ‘christmas trees’ and that was the first one I found [10:24 AM]

Y/N: ha ha hilarious [10:25 AM]

Y/N: so, what are the Park family plans for the day? [10:25 AM]

Jimin: the usual. Opening presents, going to my grandparents later for dinner. What about you? [10:25 AM]

Y/N: same, minus the grandparents. We usually have a pretty low-key day [10:26 AM]

Jimin: sounds nice [10:26 AM]

Jimin: what’s your favorite present so far [10:27 AM]

Y/N:

Jimin: LOL [10:30 AM]

Jimin: how many of them did you get? I’ve gotten two new dance bags and seven pairs of black leggings. It’s like our parents have forgotten we do anything else [10:31 AM]

Y/N: no new dance belts? 😈 [10:32 AM]

Jimin: Y/N, I’m shocked [10:35 AM]

Jimin: mind out of the gutter. Stop thinking about my junk [10:35 AM]

Y/N: as your dance partner, I have a vested interest in your junk. What if it breaks free in the middle of practice? [10:38 AM]

Jimin: the more delicate ladies would faint, I imagine [10:41 AM]

Jimin: and probably Paulo [10:41 AM]

Y/N: lmao [10:43 AM]

Y/N: but seriously, I hope you get presents other than dance gear [10:43 AM]

Jimin: back at you haha [10:47 AM]

Y/N: I can’t help but notice you didn’t get me, your dance partner, a Christmas gift though [10:50 AM]

Jimin: was the drive home not enough? [10:50 AM]

Y/N: oh, shoot. You’re right! You did get me a Christmas gift [10:51 AM]

Y/N: I’m the one who’s been remiss [10:51 AM]

Jimin: don’t forget about my housewarming gift, too [10:52 AM]

You smiled, sitting back on the sofa. Jimin was lucky enough to be moving off campus second semester. He, Hoseok and Alex Wong were moving into an apartment not far from Paulo’s. You and Noelle had decided to stay in Grace Hall, but you’d talked about moving someplace else next year.

Jimin was heading back early to move into his new place, so you’d need a different ride on your return trip to Russet. Still, you were looking forward to Jimin’s apartment hosting parties in the new year.

Y/N: don’t get greedy on me now, Park [10:54 AM]

“Who’re you texting?”

Jerking your head up from the screen, you nearly dropped your phone. From the couch opposite, your mom gave you a knowing look.

“No one,” you said hastily, setting your phone aside.

“Oh, really?” She glanced with your dad. “No one wouldn’t happen to have dark hair, his own car and excellent table manners, would he?”

Immediately, you felt your face heat.

When Jimin drove you home before Christmas, your parents had insisted on feeding him before he continued to Harleigh Heights. This had led to the weirdest double date of your life – which was, in fact, not a date – including you, Jimin and your parents for dinner. Luckily, your parents had been great and Jimin hadn’t cared, but you’d been endlessly mortified for your first date with Jimin to have included your parents.

Not that you’d called it a date. When Jimin had left that night, you’d brushed it aside and he’d simply gone along with it. After Jimin had left, you’d gone to your room and wondered what the hell you were doing. It was clear you still liked Jimin and wanted to be more than just friends. Still, something continued to hold you back.

You weren’t sure when it was considered appropriate to move on. The line seemed fuzzy, so you hadn’t dared cross it and Jimin hadn’t asked. You got the feeling you needed to be the one to make the first move – which made sense. You’d been the one who asked for more time. You’d told Jimin you’d say when you were ready.

Any next steps would have to come from you.

It had been weird to go home and not see Finn. His house was only fifteen minutes away from yours – you’d driven past it on your way to the grocery store last week. Still, seeing his home hadn’t caused the pain you’d expected. It was strange not to see him, but more like you’d forgotten something you needed to do, as opposed to missing his actual presence.

If you were being honest, Finn had crossed your mind less and less lately. Possibly because you’d been falling out of love with him long before you’d broken up in November.

Still, it would be unfair to jump into something before you were ready. You’d already hurt Jimin once this past fall and were determined not to do so again. No matter how good things had been lately between you, you didn’t want to make the mistake of dating Jimin too soon.

Despite this, things had become flirtier between you as of late. Exhibit A: casual text conversations about Park Jimin’s junk.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said lightly.

Your dad laughed as he stood from the couch. “Alright, then,” he said, grabbing another gift. “How about you open this one next?”

Accepting the thin package he handed over, you frowned. The box wasn’t large and, shaking it slowly, you heard no sliding inside.

“I swear,” you said as you began to undo the bow. “If you wrapped your passport photo again, dad...”

Laughing, he settled back on the couch by your mom. “It’s not that, I promise.”

Grumbling, you opened the box and immediately froze. Staring at the paper inside, you slowly looked up. “Is this… is this what I think it is?”

“It’s a plane flight,” your mom said with a smile. “I know we’re supposed to drive you back on the third, but we thought you might want to celebrate New Year’s with your friends.”

“But…” Speechless, you returned to the box. “We always hang out together on New Year’s Eve.”

“I know,” said your dad. “But maybe it’s time to start some new traditions, kiddo.”

With that, he stood and took his mug to the kitchen. Sensing he wasn’t needed for this conversation any longer, he began washing dishes and to prepare breakfast. Once he was gone, your mom moved to your couch and settled beside you.

“I… this is too much,” you said, immediately backpedaling.

“It’s not.”

“Well…” Hesitant, you considered the possibilities. “I guess Ari will be in the city for New Year’s Eve. Maybe Noelle, too. She mentioned she might go back early.”

Gently, your mom smiled. “That’s great if you want to hang out with them, but… didn’t Jimin mention going back before New Year’s?”

Startled, you glanced up. You were surprised she’d remembered. Jimin had mentioned it briefly at dinner last week – he’d said he was moving off campus, which was why he’d needed to return home to pack.

“I – he might have,” you said cautiously.

“I see.” She paused. “I just… I don’t want you feeling like you need to hold yourself back, honey.”

“What do you mean by that?”

Your mom glanced meaningfully at your phone. “I’m glad you’re taking time to yourself,” she said slowly. “It’s important to know who you are and what you want. But also – don’t feel like you need to follow someone else’s timeline when it comes to moving on.”

“I know, but…” You trailed off. “We only broke up in November.”

She shrugged. “Only you know when you’re ready, honey. I just don’t want you to keep punishing yourself for something that’s over. You’re allowed to be happy, even if you’ve messed up in the past.”

Swallowing, you glanced again at the gift. The plane ticket was for the day before New Year’s Eve. Plucking it from the box, you sat back on the couch.

“But…” you said lowly. “Mom, it’s only been two months.”

“And are you still in love with Finn?”

“No.”

“And did you learn anything from what happened this fall?”

“I… Yes. A lot.”

“Good.” Reaching out, she squeezed your hand. “Learn the lessons you need to learn, and then move on. Self-flagellation isn’t productive, Y/N.”

You nodded, still uncertain about what she was saying. Her words made sense, but everything she was saying uncovered a dormant fear. You were scared. Scared of hurting someone else, scared of being hurt by someone else in return. Your last relationship had ended so badly, it was hard to convince yourself it might be worth it to try again.

Finally, you turned to face her on the couch. “Does it ever get any easier?” you asked. “This fear of being hurt… does it ever go away?”

Something sad passed over her face. “Yes and no,” she said, pulling back her hand. “You’ll never be as innocent as you were in your first love. There’s something special about loving someone and never having been hurt before. Once you’ve gone through that kind of pain, you aren’t the same after. But… it does get easier. And better. You’ll know more about how to support this time, instead of tearing down. How to make a love stronger, instead of hanging on.”

Something about this speech gave you comfort, and you slowly nodded. Again, what she said made sense but if there was one thing you’d learned from the fall, it was no matter how great the advice was, it was impossible to take if you weren’t ready to hear it.

You continued wondering if the risk would be worth it. No matter how much you felt for Jimin, you couldn’t help but remember how you’d felt breaking up with Finn. You hadn’t been in love with him at that point and it had still been so painful. It was terrifying to imagine loving someone again and having things end the same way.

Your mom was right, though. You couldn’t keep punishing yourself for something you couldn’t change. There were several ways you could move on from here. The main question to ask yourself was whether you wanted Jimin in the picture.

“Alright,” you said softly. “Thanks, mom.”

“Anytime.” Smiling, she stood and dusted off her pants. “I’m going to see if your dad needs help making breakfast. Don’t be too long, now!”

You nodded, watching her go, and then glanced at the ticket. Your mom’s words continued to run through your mind and after a moment, you picked up your phone.

Jimin had texted back.

Jimin: I would never! [10:57 AM]

Y/N: hey, so [11:01 AM]

Y/N: I did get one non-dance gift this year. A plane flight the day before New Year’s Eve [11:02 AM]

Jimin: oh, wow! That was really nice of your parents [11:03 AM]

Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes. When you opened them, you found yourself newly determined.

Y/N: when do you get back again? [11:03 AM]

His ellipses started, then stopped, then started again.

Jimin: December 28th [11:04 AM]

Y/N: what are your New Year’s Eve plans? [11:04 AM]

For a moment, he didn’t respond, and you felt your heart catch. Maybe you’d misread things. Maybe Jimin had moved on and didn’t care about you anymore. Maybe he didn’t want you to tell him you were ready.

Jimin: I’m free 😊 [11:05 AM]

Jimin: want to be my New Year’s Eve date? [11:05 AM]

Smiling ear to ear, you responded.

Y/N: yes. Please [11:06 AM]

On the actual day of New Year’s Eve, you found yourself stressed beyond belief. Standing in front of the mirror of your dorm room, you adjusted your dress and worried over the hemline. Jimin had arranged to meet you around 7:00 PM and it was dangerously close to 6:55.

“Is the dress too short?” you asked, turning a little to face Noelle. “It is New Year’s Eve in the city. Should I wear pants, or something? Will I be cold?”

Noelle considered, then shrugged. “Just drink more. Problem solved!”

Snorting, you turned back to the mirror. Nervously, you smoothed down the front of your dress. You’d bought it at an after-Christmas sale and had fallen instantly in love. It had seemed perfect at the time, but now you were having second thoughts about the thin straps and tight bodice.

“Alright, so Y/N.” Noelle changed the subject. “Here’s the plan. Are you listening?”

Hiding a smile, you adjusted an earring. “Listening.”

“Good. Okay, so Ari and I will be at a party uptown. If the date goes badly, just say the word and we’ll call you a cab. You can be ringing in the new year with us within the hour.”

“Perfect,” you said. “It’s good to have a back-up.”

“It is.” Noelle paused. “Not that I think you’ll need this, of course.”

“Well, you never know.”

“Please.” She snorted. “What’s Jimin going to do? Be too charming? Too respectful of boundaries? Wear pants that show off his ass a little too much?”

“Noelle!”

She laughed, coming to a stop alongside you. Noelle wore a sparkly dress which made her skin glow, although this may have been the glitter dusted over her shoulders. Looking at herself in the mirror, she fluffed her hair.

“Seriously,” she said, meeting your gaze. “You’re going to be fine.”

“I know, I know.” Shaking out your arms, you forced yourself to exhale. “I’m just nervous, that’s all. It’s been a long time since I went on a first date.”

Noelle considered. “That’s true. Allow me to give you some dating tips, then.”

Laughing, you turned around and sat on the futon. “By all means.”

“Alright – number one.” Noelle removed lipstick from her purse. “Don’t order anything with garlic. I know, that sucks because garlic is everything, but no one wants to make out while they have garlic breath. Rule number two!”

“Whoa, whoa,” you said. “Who said anything about making out?”

Noelle gave you a pointed look. “Just in case it should happen…”

Shaking your head, you sunk back on the futon, but you knew she was right. Tonight was New Year’s Eve, after all. Ideally, you’d like to do more than kiss Jimin, but this seemed like too much of a jinx to say out loud.

Mentally, you agreed to the ‘no garlic’ rule.

“What else?” you prompted.

“Let’s see.” Noelle began to reapply her lipstick. “Relax.”

“What?”

Glancing at you in the mirror, she raised both brows. “I can see your shoulders tensing from here, babe. Just relax, okay? Tonight will be fine. You’re just hanging out with Jimin. You’ve done that before.”

“I know,” you groaned, lowering your face to your hands. “For some reason though, I’m very aware of the ‘date’ aspect of tonight. I don’t know why.”

When you looked up, Noelle gave you a sympathetic look, but before she could say more there came a knock at the door. Half-standing, you moved to open it, but Noelle shooed you back.

“Rule number three,” she said as she crossed the room. “Never answer the door for your own date.”

“What?” you laughed, although you sat back down on the futon.

Grabbing the handle, Noelle pulled open the door. Blocking you from view, she leaned her shoulder against the frame.

“Password?”

“What?” came Jimin’s voice, sounding confused.

“That’s correct!” Noelle stepped aside.

As you stood, you saw Jimin for the first time. He wore a pea coat over his outfit, his dark hair pushed back from his face in a devastating manner. When he saw you, Jimin froze, and you saw his eyes widen.

Silently, you congratulated yourself on having picked the right outfit. His gaze slowly trailed your body, lingering in places which made your cheeks heat. When he returned to your face, he slowly exhaled.

“Hey,” he said. “You… you look beautiful.”

Smiling back, you found yourself at a loss for words. “So do you.”

Jimin grinned and you stood there, smiling at each other like idiots until Noelle cleared her throat.

“Well,” she said, side-stepping Jimin to grab her coat. “I’m going to head over to Ari’s. You kids be safe, okay?”

“We will,” you laughed.

Noelle left in a flurry of kisses and glitter, waving goodbye as she stepped out the door. Jimin turned to face you once she was gone, offering a smile.

“Are you ready to go?” he asked. “I brought you these.”

From behind his back, he pulled out pink peonies, which made you gasp. They were your favorites, a little limp from the cold, but still beautiful. Taking them gently from him, you turned them over in your hands.

“They’re wonderful,” you said happily. “Thank you.”

Jimin smiled. “I’m glad you like them.”

Glancing around, you found a clean glass near the sink and filled this with water. Arranging the peonies on your desk, you took a step back and cocked your head. You’d always thought the idea of flowers on dates was kind of cheesy, but now that you’d experienced it in person, it seemed unimaginably sweet.

“There,” you said, turning back. “All set.”

Jimin smiled at this, then glanced at your bare arms. “You’re going to be cold without a coat,” he said. “That’d be a bad way to start off the new year.”

“Oh – duh,” you said, hurrying towards your wardrobe.

Pulling a coat out, you slipped this over your dress and buttoned the front. As you left the room, you turned off the lights and shut the door behind you. Jimin walked with you down the hall, continually glancing your way from the corner of his eyes.

You felt oddly shy, despite this being Jimin beside you. Jimin, who you’d known since you were teenagers. Jimin, who’d been both the utter bane of your existence, along with the single person you trusted most in the world. He’d tossed you up in the air and caught you no question and somehow, this felt like the most daring thing you’d ever done.

It was strange to walk beside him, out on a date whose future held a large question mark. Excitement and uncertainty warred in your stomach, which only seemed to exacerbate the situation. You felt as though you stood on the edge of a precipice, staring into a ravine with no discernable bottom.

As you left the building, snowflakes swirled in the sky up above and you looked up in surprise.

“Oh,” you exhaled, breath frosting before you. “I didn’t realize it was snowing!”

“Yeah.” Jimin grinned, tilting back his head. “Snow is my favorite weather, actually.”

“The wet and the cold does it that much for you, huh, Park?”

“That, and the romance of it all.”

Your smile softened a little as you fell into step alongside him. The snow continued to drift as you walked, melting as soon as it touched the pavement.

“So, where are we going?” you wondered, glancing at him. “You said you’d tell me once you picked me up and I’ve got news for you, Jimin. I’m here. I’ve been picked up.”

“Right, sure.” He shoved both hands in his pockets. “I made a reservation at this restaurant around the corner. The food’s really good so I hope you’ll like it.”

“I’m sure I will.”

“Huh.” Jimin paused. “That was easy.”

You shrugged. “I’m just excited for tonight. That’s all.”

His gaze softened a little when he glanced at you. “Me, too.”

Smiling, you continued to walk alongside him. New Year’s Eve in the city was a grand affair. The sidewalks were still lit with holiday lights, people hurrying past in brightly colored coats. Privately, you were glad Jimin had made a reservation at a restaurant instead of trying to brave a club or a bar. You’d heard horror stories from people who paid extravagantly to get into a club, only to spend the entire night waiting in line at the bar.

Turning the corner, you saw the restaurant Jimin had chosen and brightened. It was one you’d walked past several times and always wanted to try but had never found time.

Jimin held open the door as you entered. The inside still had their holiday decorations up, garland strung across every surface with tiny, white fairy lights hung up above. Everyone who was dining wore formal attire, laughing and chatting in the glow of the fireplace. The food smelled amazing and immediately, your mouth watered.

Joining the line at the hostess stand, you waited for the couple before you to leave and then Jimin stepped up.

“Park,” he told her. “Party of two.”

The hostess smiled, nodding as she flipped through her notebook. “One moment, please.” The longer she looked though, the more her face fell. After a moment, she glanced up. “Park, you said?”

“Yes.” Jimin nodded. “P-a-r-k.”

The woman nodded, flipping through her notebook again as though the name might magically appear.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, glancing up again. “There seems to be some kind of mistake. I don’t have you listed as a reservation.”

Jimin’s expression faltered. “Can you look again?” he asked, leaning forward.

The hostess nodded, running her finger down the numbered rows. “I can’t find you anywhere. Do you remember who you spoke with on the phone?”

“Rebecca.”

“Oh.” Her face immediately fell. “Rebecca left the restaurant last week. It seems a few reservations slipped through in the transition. Is there… well, before I do that – let me see what I can do,” she blurted out, turning around to rush into the restaurant.

Jimin watched her disappear and you saw his expression tighten.

Silence fell between you as you adjusted your coat. Jimin looked stressed and you weren’t sure what you should do about it. Frantically, you tried to remember times he’d been stressed during class, but before you could do or say anything, the hostess returned.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, looking harried. “The restaurant is completely booked up. I was trying to see if we could squeeze you in, but there’s just no room. I’m so sorry. Normally, only one person does the reservations, but we’ve been so busy lately...”

“It’s fine,” you said, jumping in. The poor woman looked like she was about to burst into tears. “Please, don’t worry about it. We’ll figure something out.”

Jimin glanced at you, surprised, and then nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed, returning to the hostess. “Thank you so much for your help – I appreciate you trying. We actually have a back-up reservation somewhere else, so don’t worry. We’ll come back another time!”

“Oh, really?” Her entire face brightened. “That’s so good to hear. New Year’s Eve, and all. Thank you for being understanding!”

“Yes, busy night,” Jimin said with a smile. “Take care of yourself!”

The woman nodded, seeming grateful when you stepped out of line. Jimin followed your footsteps, heading towards the door and then came to a stop. Slowly, he exhaled.

“So,” you said, turning to face him. “Where are these back-up reservations?”

Jimin winced and met your gaze. “I have none,” he admitted. “She just looked so sad. I wanted to put her out of her misery.”

“Wait.” Piecing this together, you paused. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” he said miserably. “I only made reservations here and that was super lucky, considering most places in the city have been booked for weeks. I don’t have any back-up plans.”

For a moment, you could only stare. “So, you said all that just so that poor hostess wouldn’t worry about a mistake her restaurant made?”

“I – well, yeah.”

You stared another moment, then started to laugh. It started out small but grew until eventually, you were wiping tears of mirth from your eyes.

Jimin watched you laugh, seeming thoroughly confused. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s just…” Shaking your head, you paused to catch your breath. “You’re unreal. Most people would be super stressed about New Year’s Eve plans falling through, but here you are lying to make a hostess’ night better.”

He blinked, still uncertain. “I’m… sorry about that.”

“Don’t apologize!” you insisted as you straightened. “It’s… wonderful,” you said to him shyly. “I like that about you.”

Slowly, his expression changed. “I really don’t have other plans, though,” he admitted. “I wasn’t lying about that. And I am stressed about my reservation falling through. I wanted this night to be perfect.”

The sweetness of this made your heart start to melt and newly determined, you nodded.

“We can fix this,” you said. “We’ll just go somewhere else.”

“Like where?”

“Like...” You paused. “We could hang out at my dorm. Or at your apartment! One of our kitchens has to be free, right? We could make dinner and hang out, watch the ball drop.”

“We could go to my place,” said Jimin slowly. “Hoseok and Alex are at a New Year’s Eve party uptown. We’d have the kitchen to ourselves.”

“Perfect,” you said. “Let’s go there.”

“I should warn you, though – I can only really cook one thing.”

“Spaghetti-o’s?”

“Okay, two things.”

You laughed. “So, what’s the first thing?”

“A pasta dish they taught us in Senior Foods class. But it’s nothing fancy.”

“Perfect.” You shrugged. “That will go nicely with my contribution of store-bought bread and olive oil.”

Jimin started to grin. “Alright, then, it’s settled. Let’s go to my place.”

You smiled when he opened the door, following him onto the sidewalk. Jimin’s new apartment was a few blocks away, but time passed quickly with him beside you. Oddly enough, the mishap at the restaurant seemed to have cleared some of the lingering awkwardness.

Noelle had been right, you realized – you had nothing to worry about while you were with Jimin.

He talked while you walked, detailing the ongoing fight at his apartment about some posters Hoseok wanted to hang. This segued into the general ridiculousness of New Year’s Eve – a topic you wholeheartedly agreed with.

“It’s stressful,” Jimin complained as you walked. “Everyone’s always asking about your resolution, you need to find someone to kiss at midnight, and there’s that super awkward moment with the countdown and your date…”

You laughed, grabbing a basket as you entered the grocery store. Jimin had suggested you stop by, since he didn’t have much food at his place.

“Doesn’t the countdown make it easier?” you joked. “It really dumbs the whole process down. Fool-proof.”

“Well, sure,” Jimin said. “But then you end up staring awkwardly at someone for ten seconds while you slowly lean forward and wonder when you should blink.”

Laughing, you reached on tiptoe for a loaf of bread. “Alright, you got me there,” you admitted. “I’ve never had a proper New Year’s Eve, anyways. I’ve always been dating someone and then, it’s just kind of assumed you’ll kiss. None of the magic you see in the movies.”

Jimin nodded. “Most of that’s just movie magic, though. You aren’t missing much – trust me.”

“I don’t know,” you said as you turned the next corner. “The anticipation sounds kind of nice. Wondering if someone will kiss you back, if they’re thinking about you the same way you are…”

Jimin made a humming noise, low in his throat.

Coming to a stop, he reached overhead to grab some pasta. Putting this in your basket, Jimin casually brushed your arm as you met his faze. Fighting back a shiver, you tried to remember what you’d been saying.

Giving a smile, Jimin continued forward and kept shopping. You stared after him a moment before your gaze dropped to his ass. Inhaling quickly, you remembered Noelle’s comment about Jimin’s tight pants. She hadn’t been wrong about that. Hurrying along, you quickly caught up.

Grabbing another jar, Jimin placed this in the basket. When he caught your eye again, he grinned, his hair falling forward. The sight made your heart flip-flop in your chest.

As you entered the check-out line, Jimin came to a stop alongside you. His gaze traveled the store, eyes widening when he glanced over your shoulder.

“What’s that?” Jimin gasped.

Startled, you turned. “What’s – hey!” you blurted when he took your basket.

Grinning widely, Jimin placed the food before the cashier. “Too slow.”

“Jimin, come on,” you said, slightly flustered. “I can pay. I –”

“You can pay next time, if you want.”

This shut you up and you stared at him a moment before you stepped forward.

“There’s… going to be a next time?” you said.

Jimin glanced in your direction. “If you want there to be.”

“I do,” you said softly, and he smiled.

Taking another step forward, he pulled out his wallet to pay and you let him – this time, anyways. Outside, it seemed to have grown colder since your arrival and you shivered as you exited the shop. Noticing this, Jimin immediately undid his scarf from around his neck.

“Here,” he said, handing it over. “I don’t need this.”

“But then you’ll be cold,” you pointed out, accepting it anyways.

“I’ll jog in place to keep warm.”

“… With me walking beside you?”

“Yep.”

You laughed, even more so when Jimin began to demonstrate. He jogged for a few steps, then slowed to a walk.

“Changed my mind,” he said with a wince. “I’d rather be cold.”

You laughed, cheeks starting to hurt from both this and the wind. Jimin’s apartment wasn’t far, although it did turn out to be a third-floor walk-up. This left you slightly winded when you arrived at his place, to which Jimin shrugged and said the rent had been cheap.

Opening his front door, he led the way into – boxes. Tons of them, although most of the furniture had been set up around them. Jimin fumbled for a light, flicking this on and setting down the groceries.

“Most of the boxes are Alex’s,” he sighed, looking around. “Hoseok and I have a secret deal we’re going to unpack him ourselves if he doesn’t do it by Monday.”

“That doesn’t sound like much of a detriment to Alex.”

“I never said what we planned on doing with his things once we unpacked.”

You laughed, undoing your coat to set aside. Glancing around, you saw Jimin was right. Most of the boxes were scrawled in the same handwriting. Beyond them, you saw the living room had been mostly set up with a couch and TV.

To your right lay the kitchen, in which Jimin was already unloading the groceries. Beyond him was a hallway, through which you assumed were their bedrooms and bathrooms. Wandering back to Jimin, you realized he was staring.

“What?” you said, coming to a stop. “Did I spill something on my dress in the store?”

“No,” Jimin murmured, shaking his head. “I just… I know I said this before, but you really do look incredible.”

“Oh.”

Looking at him, you felt your face growing hot. Jimin smiled and ducked his head, resumed pulling things out of the bag. Stepping from your shoes to place in the hall, you returned to the kitchen and pulled out a stool.

Sitting down, you propped your chin in your hand. “Aren’t you going to take off your coat?”

Glancing down, Jimin blinked. “Oh,” he laughed, undoing the buttons. “I forgot I was wearing it.”

You smiled, but this quickly disappeared when you saw what he was wearing. Jimin had worn a dark blazer and trousers, paired with a paisley shirt and black boots. He looked ridiculously good and again, Noelle’s comment about his ass came to mind.

She’d been correct – his pants were well-shaped and well-formed.

After removing both coat and shoes, Jimin returned to the kitchen and pushed a hand through his hair. You watched him get to work, leaning forward a bit when he began to dice vegetables. Immediately, your brows raised. It seemed Jimin had undersold his skills in the kitchen.

When you said as much, he laughed.

“Maybe a little,” Jimin said. As he pushed veggies from the cutting board, the pan began to sizzle. “It’s all part of my master plan. Set expectations low, then over-deliver.”

“It’s working,” you said with a laugh. “You seem pretty damn impressive to me.”

Jimin’s cheeks reddened. “You’re just saying that.”

“Why would I lie?”

“I seem to remember some shocking texts about my junk and dancer’s belts. You could just be after my body, Y/N.”

“I – that’s not!”

He looked up and grinned. “Kidding.”

Flustered, you blurted, “That wasn’t nice!”

Jimin laughed. “I’m sorry.”

You huffed, waiting a minute before you continued. “You do look really good right now, though,” you said softly.

He looked up, eyes wide. As much as Jimin said he enjoyed being liked, it seemed to throw him for a loop whenever you said you liked him. It made you pause, mulling over this for a minute.

“You seem surprised,” you said quietly. “Whenever I say things like that, you always look surprised.”

“Well…” Jimin hesitated. “I just think… there’s been a lot of times where I never thought this would happen. It feels kind of unreal have you here. In my kitchen. On a date.”

“Times after November?”

Jimin paused.

Your brow furrowed. “Before then?”

Opening the pasta, Jimin added this to the pot. He stared into the steam, slowly exhaling before he looked up.

“Let’s just say I’ve wanted this for a while,” he admitted.

“What? But you hated me before Russet.”

“I…” Jimin trailed off. “Kind of. It’s complicated.”

When he failed to elaborate and returned to his cooking, your eyebrows shot up.

“Uh, no,” you laughed. “You can’t just say that and not explain what you mean. What are you talking about?”

Jimin winced as he set down his spoon. “Okay,” he said, gripping the counter. “I guess what I’m saying is I never really hated you. Not truly.”

“You didn’t.”

“No.” He spoke flatly.

“But…” Confused, you searched his face. “You’ve hated me ever since we met, Jimin. That first weekend at NUVO dance competition. We were both called out to demonstrate and you tripped me!”

“Well, maybe that’s not exactly what happened.”

“What are you talking about?”

Jimin released a low breath. “Okay, so here’s the thing. That weekend happened a little differently from my perspective.”

“How so?”

“We were both called out to demonstrate,” he said, repeating your words. “But I hadn’t seen you before then. When we both reached center and I turned and saw you – I froze. I couldn’t remember how to act. Every thought I’d ever had just… flew out of my head.”

You stared at him, speechless.

“I didn’t know what to do,” Jimin continued softly. “I’d never felt like that before. When you started to dance, it only got worse. I’d never seen someone dance like you did. That’s why I entered the combination late. That’s why I was in the wrong spot at the wrong time and that’s why I accidentally tripped you. I was… well, I was distracted.”

“By me,” you whispered. “You were distracted by… me?”

“Yeah.”

“So,” you said, breath catching. “This entire time, you haven’t really hated me?”

“Ah, I don’t know about that.” Jimin rubbed the back of his neck. “You could be really infuriating,” he said with a laugh. “There were times when you genuinely pissed me off. I meant it when I said I wanted to win against you. But also… I don’t know. I never really forgot the first time I saw you.”

“Oh,” you whispered, unsure what you were feeling.

It made your head spin to hear this different version of events. Jimin hadn’t hated you – at least, not in the same way you had. He hadn’t been the one to make the first move after all. You had when you’d decided not to listen to his apology.

“Oh my god,” you groaned, burying your face in your hands.

“Hey – what’s wrong?”

Dropping his spoon to the counter, Jimin came around and stood beside you. Keeping your head down, you refused to look up until Jimin touched your arm.

“I just,” you exhaled, turning to face him. “It was my fault. This entire time, I thought you hated me and that’s why I hated you. But instead, I just decided to hate you – and for what?”

Jimin’s upper lip twitched. “I wasn’t entirely blameless, you know. I was such a little shit at that age. I wouldn’t have believed me, either.”

“You tried to apologize, though!”

“Hey.” Gently, he gripped your elbows. “If it makes you feel any better, I did trip people just to get to the front. I was an ass. It’s why that Jungkook guy hates me. I started dancing later in life, so I was really hung up on proving myself.”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t true,” you told him. “You didn’t trip me on purpose, and if I’d only been less stubborn –”

“Whoa, hey.” Jimin smiled. “You weren’t the only stubborn one. Maybe it started off as a misunderstanding, but I didn’t really fight it. You were my competition as much as I was yours.”

“I guess,” you said quietly. “I just… I feel like I wasted so much time hating you. Maybe we could’ve even been friends.”

His gaze sparked. “Just friends?” he asked with a quirk of his brow.

“Jimin,” you groaned, but started to smile.

“Listen.” Expression softening, Jimin moved closer. “Even if I had decided to explain all this in high school, would you have believed me?”

“Probably not.”

“Exactly. I was a dick back then.” He nodded. “Remember that one time I lied and told you the awards ceremony had been pushed back an hour?”

Sitting up straighter, you glared. “Oh, I remember. I showed up after they’d already taken the photo for Top Junior solos.”

Jimin grinned. “Or the time I put an out of order sign on the women's restroom after your solo at BRAVO, so you had to run all the way across the auditorium?”

“That was you!” you blurted out, wide-eyed. “No one would believe me when I said it was! Every girl was so pissed off at you that weekend.”

“Which is exactly why I could never admit it was me!”

In disbelief, you shook your head. “You did all of that just to get back at me?”

Jimin’s smile disappeared. “Hey, you weren’t innocent either,” he argued. “Remember the time you spilled an entire water bottle next to my bag so that when I sat down, my ass got all wet?”

Devious, you smiled. “Honestly, there was kind of an ulterior motive there. As much as I hated you, your ass looks great in damp sweats.”

Jimin’s jaw dropped a little.

Managing to shut this, he took a casual step forward. “Is that what you thought?” he murmured, barely able to conceal the thickness in his voice.

“I… may have noticed a few things about you.”

When he placed a hand next to you on the counter, your breath hitched in response. Jimin repeated this with his other hand, bringing his body a step closer to yours.

Hesitant, his gaze roamed your face. “What else did you notice?”

“I…” you exhaled and glanced at his lips.

The air between you could have been cut with a knife, heated for a different reason than the stove beside you. Which – eyes widening, you glanced over.

“Shit!” you blurted. “Jimin, the pasta!”

Startled, he looked in the same direction as you and realized the water was boiling. Rushing away, Jimin entered the kitchen and turned down the burner. Now that you were separated by a solid counter, you felt somewhat dazed when you glanced up and saw him.

Meeting your gaze, Jimin came to a stop. “Anyways,” he said softly. “Now, you know. I didn’t trip you on purpose. I never really hated you. And I’m incredibly glad you’re here tonight.”

Watching him speak, something warm bloomed in your chest.

“Me, too,” you whispered.

Smiling, Jimin returned to the pasta and you settled back on the stool. Delicious scents soon filled the kitchen and you realized how truly hungry you were. You hadn’t eaten much at lunch in preparation and by now, you were famished.

It wasn’t long before Jimin placed pasta onto plates, adding the bread you’d cut up on the side. He brought these to his table, disappearing briefly to return with two candles.

“Oo,” you said as you took a seat. “Fancy.”

Jimin lit the one closest to you with a flourish. “We aim to please, here at Park Jimin’s Fine Eating and Dining.”

“Is that the name of your restaurant?”

“It is.”

“And you’re set on that decision?”

“I decided on a whim, but I have no regrets,” Jimin said, taking a seat across from you. “Now, eat before you piss off the chef and he takes back your food.”

Laughing, you dug into the pasta before you. It was delicious and, after the very first bite, you sighed in appreciation. Apparently, Jimin had truly set the bar low. Conversation began to flow, any lingering tension disappeared after talk of your past.

It was the oddest thing. You’d heard stories from friends about other first dates. They worried about how to behave, what to wear, or what to say to their date – but none of these worries seemed to exist for you in the moment. You’d been so concerned before the night began, but now that you were here, all these worries seemed to fly out the window.

You’d thought you’d spend the entire night comparing. Comparing Jimin to your last relationship, comparing Jimin as a date to Jimin as a friend, but instead, it felt like natural progression. It wasn’t a matter of comparing Jimin to anyone else, but rather simply enjoying where the night led.

After dinner, you insisted on helping clean because Jimin had cooked and bought the food. Donning rubber gloves over your dress, you stood at the sink and began to wash dishes. Jimin laughed as he joined, pulling on gloves to dry the dishes beside you. Once this was done, he suggested watching a movie before the ball dropped.

Collapsing onto the sofa, you adjusted your dress and scanned the room. The posters Jimin had bemoaned were now hung over the TV – you wondered if Hoseok had managed to somehow sneak them past his roommates. Small touches here and there made you think of Jimin.

A game he’d mentioned was out on the coffee table and a blanket which smelled like him was draped over a chair. Pulling this towards you, you wrapped it around yourself as Jimin left the kitchen.

Holding two glasses of wine, he paused when he saw you.

“What?” you said, glancing down.

“Nothing.” Jimin cleared his throat. “Are you cold?”

“A little,” you admitted, tugged his blanket closer.

“Shoot.” Jimin frowned. “The heat’s been weird since we moved in. I’m not sure how to fix – oh!” Setting the glasses down, he rushed towards the hall. “Do you want a sweatshirt?” he called.

“Yes, please!”

Jimin reappeared moments later, a navy sweatshirt in hand. Handing this over, he settled beside you on the sofa. He’d ditched his blazer and now, Jimin was dressed in only the paisley shirt and slacks.

Pulling his sweatshirt overhead, you somehow managed to get stuck right away. It was hard not to, with your hair and the dress, trying not to flash him while you kept your legs crossed.

After a moment of watching your undignified struggling, Jimin cleared his throat.

“Need help?”

“Yes, please,” you said weakly.

Jimin laughed, helping you free and once the hoodie was settled, you sighed and leaned back. Glancing sideways at Jimin, you found him already looking at you.

“What do you want to watch?” you asked.

Jimin blinked, then glanced at the TV. “Hm,” he mused, grabbing the remote. “We could watch the ball drop and enjoy the fact that we’re sitting inside, not standing in the freezing cold without any bathrooms.”

“I know!” you said with a shudder. “Out of all the stupid traditions, that’s one I’ll never understand.”

“How do so many people have it on their bucket list?”

“Right? That, and the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Zero out of ten. It’s cold, there’s wind and again, there’s the question of bathrooms.”

Jimin laughed as he scrolled through the channels. “Alright, so no to the ball drop. Want to watch a movie?”

“Sure.”

“What movie?”

“Why’re you making me pick?” you whined, sinking deeper into his cushions. “That’s such a large amount of pressure.”

“Exactly, which is why I don’t want to do it.”

You laughed and after some back and forth, decided to watch About Time. This was a movie about obstacles and falling in love, which seemed more than fitting because of the new year. At first, you and Jimin were watching diligently but eventually, he asked a question and conversation slowly drifted from the movie.

At some point, Jimin lowered the volume to focus solely on you. You curled deeper into the couch beside him, your thighs somehow touching and shoulders inches apart. Jimin’s head leaned against the cushion and he continued to smile in a way which made your heart flip.

“Here’s a question,” you murmured, no longer pretending to watch the movie.

His eyes gleamed in the darkness. “What?”

“Why’d you tell Sabrina you only wanted to be friends?”

Briefly, his eyes widened. “How did… you know about that?”

“She told me.”

“Hm.” Jimin gave you a dubious look but moved past it. Sabrina had begun hanging out with your friends as of late. “But alright, I’ll answer. If I do though, you need to answer one of my questions. Deal?”

“Deal.”

“So, I was single when I came to Russet.” Jimin paused. “It was the first time in a long time, and I may have hooked up with a couple of people.”

“Hm,” you said tightly.

His eyes danced with amusement. “Jealous?”

“Answer the question.”

He laughed. “Anyways, I only hooked up with Sabrina the one time. Afterwards…” Jimin sighed. “I felt kind of weird about her asking me to switch partners. Then I overheard what she said about Ari at weigh-ins and just didn’t feel like anything more... Plus, there was the other reason.”

“And what was the other reason?”

“I was starting to like you,” he said, a bit softer. “The day you said you wanted to be friends was a giant weight from my chest. And the more relaxed you were around me, the more… I don’t know. The more I liked you, I guess. My mom has always called me her hopeless romantic,” Jimin said with a smile. “I don’t know about that, but I can be single-minded when I like someone. That was part of the reason I told Sabrina we shouldn’t hook up anymore.”

“Oh,” you whispered.

His smile turned lopsided. “Does that answer your question?”

“Yeah. I guess it does.”

“My turn, then.” Smile disappearing, his gaze darkened. “Why did you really call me that night at the club?”

“Oh. That. Well, I –”

“And don’t say it was because I had a car,” Jimin interrupted. “There were a lot of people you could’ve called to help. You didn’t, though. You called me. Why?”

You hesitated before you realized there was only one answer. “I wanted to see you,” you said honestly. “I was scared, I was alone and… you were the person I wanted to see.”

Jimin’s gaze had become nearly black, the air between you thick with something unsaid. You were suddenly conscious of all each part of your body pressed to his. When Jimin shifted on the couch, you moved somehow closer.

He hesitated, then glanced at your mouth. “I don’t…” Jimin licked his lips, sounding hoarse. “I don’t want to do anything you’re not ready for.”

“You won’t,” you told him.

Something uncertain passed over his face. “Maybe we should take things slow.”

“Or,” you said slowly. “I could tell you things I like about you, instead.”

“And what would be the point of that?”

Your gaze shifted to his. “You’ve told me a lot tonight about how much you like me,” you said softly. “About how long you’ve liked me. I think it’s time I returned the favor.”

Something in his gaze cracked and he nodded. The TV in the background was quiet, only the noise from the street and the whoosh of the heater breaking the silence.

“First,” you said, glancing down at his lap. “You have really nice hands.”

Jimin’s lips twitched. “My hands? I’ve always thought they were small.”

“Wrong. They’re the perfect size. Never have they dropped me.”

“Mm, that’s a good point.”

“And your smile,” you said.

“What about it?”

“I like your smile,” you told him. “It makes me smile.”

His eyes crinkled in demonstration. “Oh, yeah?”

“And your ears.”

Jimin laughed. “My ears?”

Reaching out, you delicately traced over an edge. “I’ve spent a long time looking at your profile, Park. I know what I’m talking about here.”

As your fingers moved lower, feather-light down his jaw, Jimin’s smile disappeared.

“I like your jaw, too,” you told him.

In the darkness, his gaze glinted, and you felt his jaw tense.

“And your lips,” you added, gaze lowering. “I like those a lot.”

“Y/N…” Jimin’s eyes fluttered shut.

“Yeah?”

He slowly exhaled. “I just don’t want you to regret this.”

“Jimin.”

He opened his eyes.

Your expression was serious. “I told you I wouldn’t jump into something before I was ready,” you said, lifting your other hand. “But I’m not in love with Finn anymore. It doesn’t hurt when I think about what happened last semester. I like you, Jimin. I want you. I don’t want to keep pushing you away. I get if you’re unsure about this, though. If you’re unsure about me.”

Jimin’s gaze roamed your face. “Unsure?”

“I know I hurt you before. I shouldn’t have kissed you and ran away. But I promise this isn’t like that. I’m not running away. I’m the furthest thing from running and I –”

Cutting you off, Jimin pressed his lips to yours.

You shuddered a little, leaning into his kiss before he pulled back. Jimin exhaled, barely a breath before he kissed you again.

Noses brushing, lips lingering, the kiss slowly deepened. Your hands curled into his hair, pulling him forward to bask in his warmth. It was dizzying, how different this felt than last time. Last time you’d been heartbroken, desperately yearning each time your lips had touched.

Now, Jimin felt like air, like sunshine as you drowned in his presence. Hand grasping your waist, Jimin moved you closer so your chest nestled to his. Lifting his fingers, his touch skimmed your jaw, your hairline before he circled the nape of your neck.

Drawing away, he bit down on your lip. With a low sort of moan, Jimin sought your lips again. When his mouth opened yours, his tongue swept forward and you nearly combusted.

This was only to tease, though. Only to taste before he pulled away, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. Thumb skimming your jawline, Jimin tilted your head back to brush a kiss to your throat. Moving higher, he worshiped a slow path up the column of your neck. At your ear, he nipped gently before he returned.

Now, his kisses began to deepen. Mouths opening, your tongues brushed only briefly before he chose to withdraw. You were glad you were kissing on the couch, because suddenly your own legs felt weak underneath you.

Hand re-gripping his waist, Jimin pulled you against him. Eager, your hands found his neck and the blanket dropped to the floor. It wasn’t enough, though – you needed more, wanted to feel him fully beneath you. Rising on your knees, you swung a leg over his lap and settled on top.

Jimin hissed, his head hitting the back of his couch. Your dress had ridden up in the process, exposing your thighs – his thumbs skimmed the surface before he looked up.

“Shit,” Jimin croaked.

Smiling, you bent to kiss him again. Jimin arched upwards, each part of your body electric where you touched. He shifted his hips, granting friction and heat which made you short-circuit. Pressing yourself closer, your thighs sild backwards until they nestled around his waist.

Jimin’s hand found your spine, pulling you closer as his hips pushed upwards. You groaned when you felt him shift underneath you. The kisses grew steadily hotter, this ache in your core increasing with every touch.

“Can I…” Pulling away, Jimin glanced lower. “Can I take off the sweatshirt?”

“Yeah,” you said, a bit dazed.

Jimin didn’t waste time, helping you pull this swiftly overhead. It was tossed on the ground and when your dress was revealed, he inhaled.

Slipping his hands up your bodice, Jimin met your gaze. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” he confessed, his voice hoarse.

“Do what?”

Your breath hitched when his hands skimmed your breasts, lingering in all your softest places.

“Touch you,” Jimin said. “It was torture to see you, to look at you and not be able to do this. Not how I wanted, anyways. I’d tell myself not to think about it, but…”

“Jimin.”

He paused and looked up. “Yes?”

“Touch me. Please.”

Without hesitation, Jimin slid his hands lower. Cupping your ass, he pulled you against him and allowed his other hand to drift up your spine. You shivered, closing your eyes as your head tilted back.

His hands slid up your front, over your breasts and under the straps of your dress. Jimin’s thumbs drifted lower, brushing your nipples through the fabric of your bodice. Opening your eyes, you looked down at him and saw his gaze darken.

Reaching higher, Jimin cupped the back of your neck and returned your lips to his.

He kissed you slowly, purposefully as you melted forward. Shifting against him, the kiss began to intensify. Mouths opening, your tongue swept forward in bold strokes against his. Suppressing a whimper, you ground your hips on his lap.

“Is,” you murmured, breaking free. “Is your bedroom unpacked?”

Jimin went still. “I – mostly, yeah.”

“Can I see it?”

“Fuck, yes,” he groaned, releasing your thighs as he stood from the couch.

You laughed, sliding down his front as your feet hit the ground. Tugging your dress down, you followed Jimin when he grabbed your hand. He pulled you down the hall, coming to a stop at the last room on the row. Pushing open the door, he flicked on the light and came to a stop.

Stepping forward, you glanced around Jimin’s room. You recognized some of the items from the two times you’d visited Jimin in the dorms. Photos of his family were carefully hung on the wall and he had the same pillows laid over his queen-sized bed.

Turning around, you took a step backwards and sat on his bed. “It’s nice,” you said, patting the comforter. “I like it here.”

Jimin watched you, his gaze half-lidded from the hall. “I like you here.”

Cheeks heating, you watched him enter and gently shut the door. Leaning back on your elbows, you arched a brow.

“Where’d we leave off?”

Jimin exhaled as he crossed the room. “I think you were on my lap,” he said hoarsely, kneeling beside you.

You nodded, moving to straddle him as he leaned to the wall. Catching your waist with both hands, Jimin pulled you against him, kissing you roughly even before you sat down. Suddenly ravenous, his hands slid to your ass as he rolled you against him. Inhaling sharply, you sucked his lower lip between teeth as he groaned.

Reaching up, Jimin tugged on your hair as you inhaled, throat exposed for him to kiss slowly down your front. When he returned to your lips, you ground your hips impatiently over the bulge in his pants.

Shifting his weight, Jimin’s spine hit the wall. He stared at you, slightly dazed with his kiss-reddened lips. Without looking away, Jimin lifted his fingers and began undoing his shirt. You stilled, watching each inch of skin be revealed. When he reached the last button, you gave in and helped push this aside. Smiling, Jimin sat up as his shirt fell to the floor.

You weren’t sure where to look first. Hands faltering, you slid them up his abs, over his shoulders and down his biceps. He was so perfect, it almost hurt to look at. Jimin’s breath quickened as you touched him and slowly, he lowered you down to the bed.

“Enough,” he said roughly, returning your lips to his.

As you kissed it turned lazy, nothing but grinding and touching. Jimin’s hair was messy beneath the pull of your fingers. He didn’t seem to mind, his own hands digging into the curve of your thigh. Playing with the hem of your dress, he deftly slid upwards.

“Jimin,” you said, breaking free. “Unzip me.”

His gaze darkened. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Jimin nodded, following suit when you sat up beside him. Turning around, you exposed your back and Jimin began to lower the zipper. He moved slowly, taking his time as his fingers brushed skin. Holding the dress up with your hands, you waited until it was fully unzipped before releasing it to the floor.

Turning around, you found Jimin’s jaw slack.

“You…” He roughly inhaled while he scanned your body. “Lace, Y/N? Really?”

“Do you like it?” you asked.

You may have gone overboard preparing for tonight. Although you hadn’t been sure what would happen, you also hadn’t wanted to be caught off your guard. Tonight, your constant need to plan had come in handy. Beneath your dress you’d worn a crimson lace bra and panties – a matching set which Jimin seemed to like, based on his expression.

“You’re going to kill me,” he muttered, lowering his lips to your neck.

Kissing slowly down your chest, he came to a stop where the two halves joined together. Skimming the length of your torso, his hands trembled a little when he brushed the lace.

Jimin looked up. “I’m sorry I keep touching you,” he murmured. “I just – you’re driving me crazy. You’ve been driving me crazy.”

“You said that before,” you whispered.

“I meant it.”

Kissing again up your body, he lingered in places your skin was exposed. Inhaling, your eyes fluttered shut as you grasped his shoulders.

Jimin’s hand slid between your thighs. “Part them,” he murmured, and you obeyed.

Heart racing, you opened your eyes and watched Jimin drag a finger slowly up the center of your panties. Even you could feel how damp the fabric was, how wet and ready you were for him.

Lifting his finger to his lips, Jimin sucked. “You’re soaking,” he breathed, sounding eager. “So good to me.”

Lowering his head, his tongue flicked your breast. Teasing the nipple through fabric, he urged and he sucked until it was fully erect. Moving onto the next one, Jimin grazed with his teeth until it pressed wantonly into the lace cup of your bra. Moaning his name, you arched against him.

Finding your wrists, Jimin pinned you backwards as he continued. Thighs caging your waist, he kept you hostage with his exquisite torture. The lace of your bra was now drenched, Jimin sucking debauchedly through fabric.

“Jimin,” you groaned, twisting on the sheets. “Please.”

His hips rolled lazily against your center. “Not yet,” he insisted before pulling back. “Not until you make a mess of my sheets. Want to ruin these panties.”

Sliding a hand between your thighs, he lightly circled your entrance. Feeling how wet you were, Jimin softly groaned. Sitting back on his heels, he finally relented and pulled your panties down. Tossing these to the floor, he returned to your thighs and spread your legs.

Lightly, Jimin dragged the pads of his thumbs up and down your panty line. “God, you’re so perfect,” he murmured. “Got my sheets fucking soaked.”

Separating two of his fingers, he slowly dragged his digits up and down your folds. You inhaled, feeling needy while you watched him touch you. Each brush of his fingers had you dripping – teasing over your entrance, he refused to give you exactly what you wanted. Feather-light, Jimin circled your swollen clit with his finger.

Hands gripping the sheets, you could only stare while Jimin brought you closer and closer to the edge. He was barely touching you, but it was the most turned on you’d ever been in your life. Jimin’s thumb swiped over your clit, rubbing you gently as you keened in frustration, arching against him.

He continued like this until you were gasping, begging for more and then – only then – did he slide a finger inside you. Legs trembling, you arched on his mattress and stared at him, glassy-eyed. When Jimin began to move in and out, you lost all control.

Lowering his head, he closed his lips over your clit.

“Oh my god,” you whimpered as you broke apart.

Barely did he suck before you were coming undone, pulsing around his fingers. Shuddering with pleasure, you collapsed on the bed as you rode out your high. Gently, Jimin pulled out his finger and returned to your lips.

Reaching behind you, he undid the clasp of your bra and tossed this on the floor. Once you were fully naked, he pulled you against him. You felt limp, thoroughly sated, but familiar excitement began to stir at his front pressed to yours. Tilting your head, he gently kissed you while your fingers wound in his hair.

Jimin moved slow, letting you take the lead. Your core continued to throb with oversensitivity, although this seemed to lessen the longer you kissed him. Before long, your nipples were hardening as you rubbed against him. Fingers digging into your thigh, Jimin pulled this over his hip to watch you lazily grind.

Realizing he still wore pants, you lowered a hand, determined to fix this. Jimin helped, dragging the zipper down to throw both these and his boxers down on the floor.

He bent to kiss you again, but you placed a hand on his chest. “Wait,” you murmured. “I want to see you.”

Jimin exhaled, leaning back so you could take in his body. If you’d thought his chest was unreal, it was nothing compared to his trim hips, sculpted thighs and cock nestled between.

“Oh,” you said, dragging a hand down his front.

Jimin shuddered a little. He was already hard, his cock thick and pretty with a reddened tip. It made your mouth water to look at, wanting to lick up the shaft. Reaching between you, you closed your fist around him and slowly jerked him off.

You watched in fascination as Jimin responded. His jaw tightened, abs tense while you teased over his frenulum. His cock responded instinctively, hardening further the longer you touched him.

After a few minutes of this, Jimin shook his head. “No more,” he said huskily, taking your hand in his. “I’ll come if you keep doing that.”

“Oh?” you murmured, gaze darting lower.

He chuckled, a rough sound in his throat. “I like watching you come,” Jimin confessed, his cock hard between you. “It turns me on. I’m… still trying to recover from your last orgasm.”

“Oh,” you said, in a completely different way.

Jimin exhaled, hair falling forward. “I hope that doesn’t weird you out.”

“Does it… weird me out that you like giving orgasms?”

“Well, when you put it like that.”

“How else would I put it?”

His grin became devious. “You could ask for another.”

Breathless, you nodded and Jimin’s gaze darkened.

He descended your body, not wasting any time as he positioned himself between your legs. Licking slow up your center, you gasped and instinctively drew your legs higher. Jimin didn’t bother easing you into it. No, now he ate you out like he wanted to.

Kissing your folds, he returned to your clit and sucked this into his mouth. Rolling the sensitive bud with his tongue, he teased and released before you knew what was happening. He continued to do this, spreading you underneath him and bringing you close to coming, only to pull back and leave you maddeningly empty.

Spreading your folds, he began licking sweetly over your clit. This was followed by loose, lazy sucking and more tender flicks. You stared dazedly at him between your legs, the sight more erotic than anything you could’ve imagined.

Grinding his cock into the sheets, Jimin thrust his hips while he pleasured you. You could tell he enjoyed this; each grunt from his lips was more affirmation. Moving lower, he circled your cunt with his tongue just to lap up your juices. You gasped at the sensation, having never felt it before. Flicking your clit with his thumb, Jimin fucked your cunt with his tongue before he slowly withdrew.

Spreading you wide, he returned to your clit and you clasped a hand over your lips before a moan could escape. Each curl of his tongue left you gasping, writhing beneath the pleasurable onslaught of his mouth. Pulling away, Jimin pressed a gentle kiss to your thigh before he rose up your body.

At your mouth, he kissed your fingers. “You don’t have to be quiet,” he told you. “I want to hear the noises you make, Y/N. It makes me feel good.”

Removing your hand, you slowly nodded.

Jimin just grinned, dropping between your legs to begin eating you out again. This time, you didn’t hold back. Jimin seemed to appreciate this as you slipped further from control. He was so good with his mouth, making you see stars as your legs started to shudder. When he slid his finger inside you and fingered you again, your hands fisted in the sheets.

“Ji-jimin,” you gasped, writhing beneath him. “Jimin, I – oh.”

He began to move faster, adding a second finger as your insides clenched around him. Everything tightened, hovering at a breaking point while Jimin continued, relentless. His mouth on your clit, his fingers inside you – everything broke apart when you came, gasping his name.

Jimin didn’t move, kissing your sex as you slowly came down. He lapped at your sex, licking up your arousal before withdrawing his fingers. Once your breathing had steadied, Jimin returned to the sheets beside you.

“Good?” he breathed, draping an arm over your waist.

“Oh my god, yes,” you exhaled, burying your face in his chest.

He laughed, pulling you closer. Jimin started to pull away, which made you look up and frown.

“What are you doing?” you said.

He paused. “I’m looking for a tissue.”

“Why?”

“I… I’m kind of at a loss here.”

“No, I mean why now,” you said, baffled. “I can come again, Jimin. I want to come with you inside me.”

Jimin stared at you a moment.

“Unless…” Uncertain, you hesitated. “You don’t want to…?”

“Fuck,” Jimin muttered, sounding hoarse. “No – I want to. I really want to. Are you sure, though?” he said, reaching to open the side drawer of his bed.

You grinned when he pulled out a condom, ripping this open.

“I’m sure,” you murmured, moving closer.

Jimin rolled the condom onto himself, pausing before he went any further. Shifting his weight so he hovered over you, Jimin searched your gaze. Reaching lower, you casually stroked his cock and guided him to your center.

He didn’t enter yet, content to take his time. Instead, Jimin bent and kissed you, dragging a hand down your side. His fingers paused at your breast, tweaking your nipple until it stood fully erect. Moving to your waist, he curved under your ass and lifted your hips to his.

Arching upwards, you felt his cock brush your center. The touch made you pant, wanting him inside you and wanting it now. Rolling over his length, you marveled at the feel of him between your legs. Having him so close and not having him inside you was maddening.

“Jimin,” you whimpered.

“Yeah?” he murmured, continuing to thrust between your thighs.

“Please,” you begged him.

“Alright, baby,” he said and rolled you onto your back.

It was the first time he’d used the endearment, sending a wave of warmth through you as your legs parted. Reaching lower, Jimin positioned himself at your entrance. It took him a moment to work his way in; you were so wet, he needed a second try. With only his tip inside, you immediately clenched and buried your head in his shoulder.

Lightly, Jimin brushed a kiss to your hair. “Relax, baby,” he murmured, making you glance up. “I’ll make you feel good. I promise.”

Slowly, you nodded. “Okay.”

Laying slowly back down, you tried to relax while he worked his way deeper. With slow, shallow thrusts, Jimin finally bottomed out and you stared at him in amazement. His cock was thicker than you were used to and stuffed to the brim like this, you felt so full. Glancing down, you saw his hips nestled snugly to yours.

When you looked up, Jimin met your gaze. “I’m sorry,” he exhaled, hanging his head. “I just – I need a minute.”

“What’s wrong?” you blurted, immediately worried.

A smile passed over his lips. “Nothing’s wrong.” He looked up. “You’re just… fuck. I feel like a damn virgin. You’re so tight and wet, I’m losing my mind.”

Hearing him say this sent a shiver through you. Shifting your hips, you reveled in the sensation of him moving inside you.

Jimin groaned. “No,” he protested. “You can’t do that right now.”

“Do what?”

“Try and make me move,” he murmured. “I know you can’t see yourself, so you can’t see how hot you look. Tits out, pussy spread and dripping all over my cock.”

“Oh,” you breathed.

“Sounding like that.”

“Jimin. If you don’t –”

He suddenly thrust deeper, grinding his pelvis against your core and making you groan. Speechless, you stared as he slowly pulled out. Jimin teased you with his tip, moving a few inches back in before he thrust again.

“Oh,” you groaned, jolted upwards on the bed.

His gaze dropped to your chest. “Fuck,” Jimin said quietly, dropping down to an elbow.

He moved again in earnest, thrusting slowly in and pulling back out. It made your breath catch, needing more but loving the torture. It was torture to feel every inch of him and have Jimin continue to hold back. You knew he could go faster, deeper, but wanted to stay in control.

Dropping his head, Jimin slowly kissed your neck. His cock continued to move, fucking you slowly as your legs opened wider.

“Jimin,” you whimpered.

Your hips chased after his, hoping to coerce him deeper.

He smirked. “Yes, baby?”

“Please,” you said, arching against him. “I want more.”

“You want it harder?”

As he said this, Jimin increased his strength. Keeping the tempo the same, each thrust of his cock had your lips parting with pleasure.

“Yes,” you whimpered, barely hanging on.

“And faster? You want that, too?”

You nodded, slack-jawed as Jimin sped up the pace. His cock began to pound into you, hand fisting in sheets as he gave it to you hard. Arching underneath him, your hands dragged down his back as Jimin fully let go. With each thrust of his hips, his pelvis brushed your clit and yet, it still wasn’t enough.

“More?” he teased, continuing to fuck you.

“More,” you whimpered, sliding your hands up your breasts. Tweaking the nipples, you watched his gaze harden. “I want more, Jimin.”

He immediately moved, as though he’d been waiting for this. Grasping your ankles in one hand, he lifted them high overhead and pulled his cock out. You gasped when he did so, your hands falling to the side while you were put on display. The position pushed your pussy lips together, giving an incredible view of your dripping cunt.

Jimin plunged his cock back inside, nearly making you scream. It felt so deep this way – so deep and hard and deliciously wanton. Jimin fucked you from above, hips slamming into you and making your breasts bounce.

Jimin groaned, his hips never faltering. “Touch them,” he said, lowering your ankles to one shoulder. “Touch your tits for me, baby.”

You obeyed, hands sliding over your breasts to tease your nipples. This sent a shock of pleasure straight to your core and Jimin hammered your g-spot, making you see stars. Jaw slack, you could only lie there and take it while he made you come.

It was too much, the wave of pleasure threatening to overwhelm, but then Jimin leaned forward and you finally snapped. You felt him release into the condom as you fell apart, rope after rope of hot cum inside you.

Eventually, Jimin softened and fell onto his elbow. As he opened his eyes, he sought your gaze and you smiled. His cheeks were flushed, his hair dark and sweaty and you couldn’t help the deep surge of affection within you.

“I don’t know about you,” he murmured. “But that was pretty fucking incredible.”

“Same here,” you whispered. “I’d like to do it again sometime.”

“Three orgasms weren’t enough?”

“Were they enough for you?”

“No.” Jimin laughed. “I could watch you come all night. But we should probably get you cleaned up and all that.”

“Probably,” you agreed, although you made no effort to move.

Eventually Jimin sighed and gently pulled out. Tossing his condom in the trash, he showed you to the bathroom and let you do what you needed to do. When you returned, Jimin was on top of his bed. He’d put back on his boxers and held out his sweatshirt.

“I thought you might want this,” he said, uncertain.

Smiling, you took it and lowered it over your head. Climbing beside him on the bed, you rested your head on his shoulder and cuddled beside him. Listening to his breathing, you concentrated until yours started to match.

Outside, cheers erupted from the street. Scrambling upwards, you fought to look out Jimin’s side window. As you hurried to see what the commotion was about, Jimin groaned when you flashed him your bare ass, but followed suit.

Glancing outside, you realized it must have turned midnight. Fireworks went off over the skyline, people cheered below, and someone had lit a sparkler on the street. Voices drifted higher, wishing each other a happy new year as slowly, you turned around to face Jimin.

He smiled at you, his happiness clear when he pulled you to him. A dizzying rush of what-if’s and excitement went through you and somehow, you knew this would be only the beginning.

“Happy new year,” he murmured.

“Happy new year,” you whispered, tilting your face up to his.

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading this series 😊 It’s been a whirlwind, so thank you for sticking with our main characters throughout the journey! I hope you enjoyed and are having a wonderful holiday season :) happy (almost) new year!

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#btsbookclub #bangtanarmynet #bts smut #jimin smut #bts fanfic #jimin fanfic #bts series #bts writing #jimin series #jimin writing #bts dance au #jimin dance au

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lumosinlove · 3 years

Text

Vaincre

part v

cw: homophobic encounter.

November

November shadows,

shade November change

November spells sweet memory,

the season blue remains

“Lo!” Finn called. “Guess who just got traded to the Rags.”

Cool dread spun its way into Logan’s chest at full force. He felt the point of one of his hips knock against the counter. “Quoi?”

“Marshy and Morgs!” Finn said, and the appeared around the corner into the kitchen, red hair a mess. “Like, together. Like us.”

“These were Harvard teammates, yeah?” Leo asked, spooning sugar into Logan’s coffee.

“Like us?” Logan said. “They’re dating?”

“Oh, no,” Finn laughed. “I just meant together, like, at the same time. Around the same time, I guess I should say.”

“Wow,” Logan nodded, which prompted Finn to imitate the way he said wow, drawing out the W’s. Logan smiled, lifting his cup to his mouth. “We could visit them over the next free weekend maybe.”

“Damn, that’d be a blast to the past.”

“What are they like?” Leo asked, leaning into Logan’s side.

“You’d love Will. Will Morgan, Morgs,” Logan said. “Really level-headed, probably the nicest person I know. Marshy…”

“Percy Marshall is one crazy motherfucker,” Finn said, and poured his own cup of coffee, black.

Logan leaned into mock-whisper to Leo. “And Finn gets insane when they’re together.”

Finn shot him a look, but continued. “Best way to say it. He’ll party until the sun, he’s crazy superstitious—worse than Cap and Loops combined—and he’s also,” Finn slid onto a stool. “One of the hardest working guys you’ll ever met. Probably the hardest working.” Finn’s smile was one Logan’s favorite one, made even more so by the fact that he got to see it directed at Leo. “Until I met you, that is, Nut.”

Leo let out a pleased laugh and let Logan brush a hand through his hair. “Well, they’re in our division now. I’ll get to meet them.”

“Oh, man, we’re in for a fucking treat when we play New York next,” Finn grinned. “Gonna hit the town hard.”

Leo snorted. “You guys might.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Finn pressed a kiss to Leo’s cheek. “I know everyone we need to know.”

“And I can finally tell you,” Logan began. “That the first time you dragged me around New York knowing ever person you saw, I loved you.”

Finn blushed a little and let Leo pull him to settle in the V of his legs from where he was leaning back against the counter. “Well, it’ll be nice to see them.”

Logan nodded, but part of his chest pulled. He cleared his throat. “Ouais. Also…”

When he paused, Leo tapped their socked toes together encouragingly.

Logan shrugged and looked down into his coffee. He thought of Finn’s quick breaths when they took the Cup back to Harvard. He thought of kissing him in their old room. He thought of everything before. Percy and Will were a part of all of that. Not directly, maybe, but Logan knew what seeing them again would do.

“Memories,” Finn said, and Leo nudged him.

“Don’t say it for him.”

“Oh, right, sorry.”

“Memories,” Logan agreed. “Good and bad.”

Remus missed the net three times in fifteen minutes, and only barely managed to keep himself from breaking his stick against the boards. He would be embarrassed afterwards if he had, but could it really be so much worse than the way that he felt now?

He accepted Thomas’ fist bump as he passed him going into the locker room and sat down heavily in his stall. The game had been close, but the Devils had won out in the end. He glanced at some of the assistant coaches, who were murmuring together. There was no guarantee it was about him, but it still felt as thought it was. Sirius was talking with Evgeni, Evgeni’s loud laugh warming up the room. Remus stripped out of his sweaty uniform quickly and was headed for the showers with a towel around his waist when someone slapped him on the back.

“It’s decided,” Logan’s accent came from beside him. He wasn’t bothering with his towel, which was slung over his bare shoulder. The fleur-de-lis tattoo on his hip—and everything else—was on full display. “Me and Talker are taking you out tonight.”

Remus raised an eyebrow. “What does that mean exactly?”

Logan just smiled. “No boyfriends. No hockey. We have a day off tomorrow, so no pressure. Just some drinks.”

“And some pool, maybe,” Thomas said, coming up to Remus’ other side. “What do you say, Loops? Fun, eh?”

“Okay, one of you is butt-naked right now and the other is in a three-piece suit. I’m going to say yes and shower, all right?”

Thomas gave a whoop, and Remus couldn’t help the smile that crossed his face as he dropped his towel in the change room and turned on the hot water. He felt like a sling-shot lately, being catapulted one way, and then in the opposite direction. He guessed he should feel thankful that his friends could pick him up like that, and he did, but another part of him caved in beneath the sheer affection.

I’m letting you down.

He scrubbed his hands through his hair, and looked over his shoulder when he felt a gentle, quick kiss against the back of his neck.

“Bonsoir,” Sirius said with a soft smile, and went to the shower head beside him.

“Hi,” Remus smiled back. “Beautiful goal tonight.”

He watched the water lace over Sirius’ tan skin, darkening his hair further as he pushed it back, away from his face. “You’re beautiful.”

“Hey, Olli,” Finn called across the showers, making Olli look over at him. “You’re fucking beautiful, man.”

Olli just squeezed shampoo into his palm. “I know that, Harzy.”

Sirius’ laugh echoed through the showers, joined by others, and Remus let it warm around him like the steam.

“Apparently Tremz and Talkie are taking me out tonight,” he said to Sirius as they walked back into the locker room.

“Tremz,” Sirius called over to him. “Ouch.”

“Pas de capitaines,” Logan waved him off and went back to looking at whatever Leo was showing him on his phone. Sirius laughed and looked back to Remus.

“Sounds perfect,” he said. “Wake me up when you come in if I’m asleep.”

“And go to bed without a kiss?” Remus glanced down at the towel slung low across Sirius’ hips, then back up to his bright silver eyes. “I’d never.”

Sirius smiled and kissed him, but Remus felt the unspoken settling between them. Sirius had stopped bringing up wanting to help with Remus’ shortcomings on the ice. Remus knew he had brought that upon himself with refusals after refusals to talk about it, but now it felt more like a thing. An object. An ugly vase in the corner of the room.

Maybe he really did need to go out tonight.

Thomas settled in his stall beside Remus. “We’re gonna go to Red’s, yeah?”

Remus nodded as he pulled his gray t-shirt over his head. He held up his dark jeans. “I can wear this, right?”

“Fuck yeah, I’m not wearing this thing,” Thomas picked at the lapel of his suit. “Noelle already screen shotted the snapchat I sent her. Why keep it on now?”

Remus just laughed. “All right, Talkie. Lead the way.”

Red’s bar was shoved up against the side of a larger block of buildings in Gryffindor. Remus glanced up, one or two stars were poking through the increasingly cooling loud cover. Inside it was warm, though. Foggy in the way some rooms get when there are lots of happy people in them. Logan had chosen a long-sleeved, dark gray cotton shirt, so thin that Remus could see each ridge of his defined muscles and his necklace, too.

“What the fuck happens when that thing gets wet?” Remus snorted, plucking at it as they waited for their drinks at the bar.

“I’ll pretend we had a fight,” Thomas said. “Throw a drink on you, find out.”

Logan just eyed them suspiciously as they leaned against the bar. “You guys are strange.”

Thomas just flagged the bartender, stretching the white material of his thin knit sweater. He ordered a whiskey, Logan a rum and coke, and Remus opted for a lighter gin and tonic. They still had a game on barely 72 hours. Not that anyone was that much of a light weight, but he didn’t want any assumptions being made, any photographs taken that could put him in a worse light than he already was.

“I know what this is, you know,” he said after Logan and Thomas’ intense COD debate had gone on too long. They both looked over at him, the picture of innocence. Remus rolled his eyes. “I’m fine.”

“Media’s a bitch,” Thomas said. “That’s all this is. Hockey’s hard. You can’t help that you live with Cap, who makes it all look like a piece of cake.”

Logan laughed. “I think Cap would disagree. He stinks after games, mon dieu.”

Remus and Thomas shared a look. “And you don’t?”

“Finn likes it,” Logan smirked. “Gets him going.”

“Are you sure its the stench and not the muscles?” Thomas raised an eyebrow.

Logan waved him off. “I’m not talking about this with you two. We’re here for Loops.”

Remus groaned. “Guys…it’s not…I mean every player goes through this, right?”

They both nodded.

“Sure,” Thomas said. “But it doesn’t help that some people—“

“Assholes,” Logan amended.

“Right. It doesn’t help that some assholes don’t think you deserve to be here.”

Remus tilted his glass towards him. “Yeah.”

“We just think…” Logan began uncertainly, tongue poking out to wet his full bottom lip. “Look, I love Cap. He’s like a brother. But he’s intense. For him…sometimes hockey solves hockey.”

Remus wavered. “Yes and no.”

“We just thought you might want some other ears,” Thomas offered a smile. “I mean we can’t offer a feel good night of lovin’ to make you feel better…”

Remus snorted. “Right. You know, Talkie, that’s exactly what Sirius calls it.”

Thomas cracked up, too. “But we can offer drinks. And, you know…”

Logan raised an eyebrow at him, amused. “Ears?”

“Right,” Thomas nodded. “Look at Tremzy over here, finishing my sentences.”

Remus let his smile die down a little. “I…thanks, guys. I mean, I love talking to Sirius, but I also…he is the Captain. He’s a representation of all of us. I feel a little…” Remus took a slow breath, not sure if he was even ready for the words to come out of his mouth. “I feel a little like I’m letting him, and you all, down sometimes.”

“Aw, Loops,” Thomas said, voice softened.

“I know,” Remus sighed. “It’s just…it creeps in sometimes.”

Remus watched Logan swallow. “I get it. If there’s anything I can understand it’s guilt.”

“Tremz,” Remus said comfortingly. “I guess I should listen to my own advice here, but it’s not your fault. I can be ears, too, you know.”

“Is this…” Thomas said quietly. “Carrot?”

They both stared at him. “Carrot?”

“Code names,” Thomas whispered, even though the tables were noisy and the bar was somewhat empty.

Logan laughed a little, and nodded.

Remus waited. Logan gathered thoughts slowly, carefully. Interrupting, he’d learned while talking with Leo, tended to scatter them. He was also happy that the spotlight wasn’t entirely on him anymore.

“I found him at Harvard,” Logan began, swallowing dryly despite the drink in his hand. “And I was a mess. And then we spent that year apart, and I was a mess. And then I found him again, in Gryffindor, and I was a mess. I fell in love with Leo and I was a mess.” He looked at them, eyes pleading, then back down at his drink. “I am so, so happy now. It worked out. I can’t believe my luck. I wake up so fucking happy every morning. Every little look at them, my life with them, is incredible.”

Remus and Thomas waited some more. Thomas sent Remus a half smile across him, then leaned his cheek on his fist.

Finally, Logan finished. “But I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t a mess without them.” He closed his eyes, exhaled a frustrated breath through his nose. “That doesn’t make sense.”

Thomas nodded. “Yeah, it really does. Tremz, I get it.” He tilted his glass, making his ice cubes stir the liquid inside. “You’re someone when you’re with who you love. But you gotta be your own someone, too.”

“Ouais,” Logan was already nodded. “Right, like…Re, you’re you, no matter what. Leo, he’s the same way. Finn, too.”

Remus sighed. “I’m not so sure right now. But I think what you’re saying makes sense. Tremz, you’re allowed to want that for yourself. It’s not a slight to the boys. At all.”

Logan laughed, still laced with frustration. He rubbed at his eyes. “But I don’t even know what I’m asking for.”

Remus smiled. “Hate to break it to you, but you’ve got a pretty level-headed duo in your corner. I mean, Finn’s Finn.”

Thomas snorted. “Might take him a second.”

Logan smiled and it was fond. “Yeah.”

“But Leo…” Remus snapped his fingers. “He’ll get it. They both will.”

Logan narrowed his eyes at the bar. “I’m not asking for space. I don’t want space. I don’t want anything to change I just want to stop feeling like I’ll crash and burn by myself.”

“Me too,” Remus admitted. “Maybe in a different way, but…me too.”

“I don’t know if I feel like I’m gonna crash,” Thomas said thoughtfully. “But hey, life’s tough sometimes.” He smiled and raised his glass. “Friends.”

They clinked their glasses together, laughing, the conversation turning to organizing a pick-up game in the park that weekend—if it didn’t snow.

“Gotta use the big WC, gents,” Thomas said after a while, picking up his crutches. “Then pool?”

“Who the hell calls it that?” Remus snorted.

“Me,” Thomas called over his shoulder, politely excusing his way through the crowd with his charming smile and causing a few longing looks to follow him at his back.

Logan drained the last of his rum and coke. “You don’t feel like Cap’s putting pressure on you, do you?”

Remus looked at him, eyes widening for a moment. “God, no. No, he’s been nothing but supportive. It’s mostly me, I think. He even wants to talk about it. Sometimes I just…can’t.”

Logan nodded. “Good. No, good, I just thought I’d ask. When I first met him, he’d get like that with me sometimes. Wanting to run extra drills or talk through tape. I snapped at him for it a bit. This was before he was really who he is now.”

“Parents were lingering in him,” Remus nodded. “Yeah, I remember.”

A man came to lean against the bar beside Remus, then, and Remus shot him a smile that he hoped looked friendly rather than uneasy. The guy was really in his space. He shared a look with Logan, who’s shoulders were rounded a little in alert, green eyes narrowed in on the guy.

“You’re Lupin, eh?” the man said.

Remus sighed softly, looking down at his now watery drink. He should’ve known.

“Yep,” he replied, and looked at the man. He had two friends, hovering a little ways back.

“What’s going on this season, huh?”

The worst part was that the man was smiling, as if he thought this conversation was going to go well.

“I mean, I know you’re with the Captain and all,” the man said. “But, I mean…come on. Some of us care about how the team does.”

“Excuse me?” Remus replied.

The man tilted his head, looking mockingly regretful. “It’s not just about you.”

“Okay,” Remus said, keeping his voice flat.

“What he do to get you there?” the man asked, leaning in like they were friends. “I mean, like…some type of reward, or does he already give you those at home?”

Remus flushed. “I think we’re done talking.”

At least his friends had the decency to look a little nervous.

The man narrowed his eyes. “I’m just saying.”

“Fuck off, man,” Logan said in a low tone.

“What,” he sneered. “You got yourself a boyfriend, too, Tremblay?”

Logan was on his feet then, stools screeching back, taller than the man, stronger. Remus’ arm shot out against his chest, keeping him and his balled fists back. The man’s friend stepped forward, too.

“Whoa, Mike,” one of the friends said, hesitating. “That’s not why we…that’s not what this is.”

“Oh,” Thomas scoffed, announcing himself as he made his way back to them. He somehow made his crutches and boot look threatening. “Wrong type of harassment for you, my guy?”

The fans’ eyes went large. “Talker…”

Thomas just stared at them, and Remus watched him go from Thomas Walker with his friends to Thomas Walker on the ice, defensemen. Enforcer. “Only my friends call me that. Sit down at your own table or get out.”

Thomas shouldered through them, one crutch landing briefly on Mike’s shoe, who only just bit back a groan. Thomas was all bright, sharp grin as he sat down, leaning his crutches against the bar again. He waved the bartender over, then looked at Mike who was still standing there.

“Do I have say it again for you?” Logan snarled. “Trust me, you don’t want me to.”

Logan sat down slowly as the three men backed up and turned away. Remus pressed a thankful hand to his shoulder, also meant to calm him down a bit.

“Well, that was fun,” Thomas sighed. “Jesus. We take you out to forget about it and those three show up.”

“It’s fine,” Remus said, though his heart was pounding. “I’m surprised that was the first time it happened. Had a close call at the grocery store the other day.”

“Another round?” Logan asked. “Then pool?”

“Ouais,” Remus smiled, in his best impression of Sirius.

Most of November passed without change. Remus felt the stagnant ball of frustration in his stomach. He and Sirius cooked together, slowly mastering more and more recipes. Remus lived for the triumphant look on Sirius’ face when a dish came out just right. He went out with Logan and Thomas, with James and Sirius, Finn and Jackson and Kasey. He never felt more at home than when he was tucked against Sirius’ side at a team dinner, watching Logan toss food into Finn’s mouth from across the table, hollering when he caught it and then ruffling an embarrassed Leo’s hair, who was shushing them.

The weather had officially turned to Gryffindor winter, biting harsher and harsher with each night. It got to the point where Marlene started bugging them all about the Christmas video—for the fans, she kept insisting. Come on guys, it’ll be fun!

Evgeni seemed to be the only one who was truly game for it.

Remus wasn’t unhappy, but the media was growing more and more aggravated with him, the fans’ patience was running thin like ice, and now Arthur had started sending him glancing looks until, finally, he pulled Remus into his office as the boys were packing up.

The ball rolled around Remus’ ribs, fighting for space with his heart, and he sat in the leather chair across from Arthur’s desk.

Arthur took off his glasses, which was a bad sign. He didn’t say anything for a long time and Remus didn’t have the courage to make him.

“I know,” Remus finally said, and then his throat choked up. “I’m…”

“I don’t want any apologies,” Arthur said. “And, God, Lupin, I didn’t bring you in here to yell at your so get that look off your face.”

Remus blinked through the scarce relief and looked down at his hands.

“Media’s being real tough, I know,” Arthur sighed. “I know. I just want to make sure you’re all right.”

“I’m fine,” Remus said. “I’m just…it’s not connecting, I…I don’t know. Maybe I could put in more time one-on-one with one of the coaches. Or ground work with the trainers. I know we’re about to go on the road. Maybe tomorrow morning before practice.”

Arthur hesitated, then nodded. “If you’d like. But overworking yourself isn’t gonna help if that’s not the issue. Frankly, I don’t think skill is the issue. You’re a beautiful skater out there. You’re wicked fast and can misdirect hits like I’ve never seen. But…”

“No net,” Remus mumbled.

Arthur looked regretful. “No net.”

Remus nodded. “I’m working on it. I’m doing everything I can.”

“I don’t doubt that, Remus. Really. Don’t think I do. I’ll be seeing you at the Dumais Thanksgiving, yeah?” Arthur asked.

Remus nodded, spared a smile. “Of course.”

Arthur smiled back and rose. He clapped Remus on the back as he opened the door to his office again. “Good. Try and relax over the break, okay? I know it’s short, but sometimes its less work that pays off. It doesn’t always have to be more.” He looked up. “Ah, another young rascal I’ve had to say that to.”

Remus looked up to see Sirius’ smile, his dark hair curling against his neck, but otherwise tucked under a thick black winter hat. Every muscle in Remus’ body eased at the sight of him. He wanted to wrap himself up in Sirius, tuck himself inside of his winter coat and never leave.

“Cap,” Arthur gave him a nod. “See you for Turkey. Who you’ve got for the big game?”

Sirius just shrugged. “American football. Who cares?”

Arthur made a wounded noise—and another one came from Leo and Thomas down the hall as they were bundling up for the cold. Evgeni was holding Thomas’ crutches for him as Jackson helped him into his coat. Remus cracked up and took the warm palm Sirius held out. They walked down the hallway that smelled familiar and warm, under toned by the scent of carpet and cleaner that, had it been any stronger, would have been unpleasant, but it just added to the familiarity.

The garage door rattled shut behind them as Sirius unlocked their back door, letting them into their warm kitchen. Remus shook out of his coat, hanging it in the closet and rubbing his hands together. With his coat and bag, he tried to drop everything else at the door. This was his and Sirius’ space. This wasn’t a rink, or a locker room, or the press room. Theirs. The word was warmer than the heat Sirius had set to come on a half hour before they got home.

“I’m starving,” he said. “What do you feel like? I maybe want pasta.”

“I feel like you,” came the reply from behind him.

Remus’ smile was slow and he turned to see a glint in Sirius’ eye. “What is it, the cold weather? You’ve been all riled up after games lately.”

Sirius just grinned, hands squeezing Remus’ hips. “I love watching you out there.” He pressed a kiss to Remus’ cheek, his neck and his nose, between each phrase. “I love your face, I love your feet, I love your shoulders, and the way you bite the finger of your glove while you watch the game between shifts.” The kisses got considerably more heavy, lingering and accompanied by the the brush of a tongue and teeth. “I love the way you cradle a puck and the way you tape your stick. The way your hair sticks to your neck.”

Remus just smiled, eyes closed. “I’ve been playing like shit.”

“Nu-uh,” Sirius said, and Remus whined a little at the next nip, letting Sirius rock him back against the kitchen counter. “Slumps are normal. You play amazing. Just no points. Shit and slumps,” Sirius said, and Remus’ mouth went dry as he was lowering himself to his knees. “Shit and slumps are different.”

Remus let out a laugh. “Aren’t those the words to turn a guy on.”

Sirius just grinned and bit at his pants zipper. “I love you.”

“Better choice.”

Sirius carefully pulled Remus’ zipper down. “Can I? Here?”

Remus only reply was tugging Sirius’ hat free to get at his hair, the thick strands weaving between his fingers. He could already feel himself getting interested, pressing against the slip of his boxers by Sirius’ proximity alone.

“Sirius Black,” Remus sighed as Sirius nuzzled against him. He stroked over his hair, overwhelmed with how much every part of Sirius meant to him. “I love you.”

Sirius took one of the hands Remus had in his hair by and kissed the inside of his wrist.

Remus let Sirius’ mouth fuzz his mind out, moaning softly at his hollowed out cheeks, laughing at the gentle nips to his hips and thighs. After, Sirius kissed him against the counter until both of their stomachs growled. Remus pressed his mouth against Sirius’ flushed hot cheek.

“I feel like a million bucks, thanks, baby.”

Sirius just smiled, tucking himself away.

It was true. Remus felt home. Settled. Almost as if he could forget the conversation today. Maybe even like he wanted to go down the the basement rink, just for fun, which he hadn’t felt like in a while.

“D’accord,” Remus sing-songed. “We have pasta or chicken or both.”

Sirius grinned. “Both.”

They were mostly quiet as they cooked, bumping hips, iPhone playing softly through their speakers. Remus watched the way Sirius kept his fingers carefully curled away from the knife, like Remus’ mom had taught him that summer. His tongue peaked out of the corner of his mouth, the same way it did when he was carrying a puck up the ice.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sirius asked softly as Remus minced garlic.

Remus glanced over at him, then kept his eyes on his fingers, so close to the sharp blade. “Um. Coach says it’s not my fault. He says I’m playing well. It’s just…pointless.”

“C’est pas—”

“No, not like pointless, like, pointless. Like I’m not getting net.”

“Ah.”

They smiled at each other, Remus’ a little shakier.

“Yeah.”

I feel like I’m letting you down.

“I feel…” Remus began, and the words caught. “Um. I mean, it’ll get better. It has to.”

Sirius’ expression flickered, but he nodded. “Mhm.”

“Do you feel like a white sauce?” Remus asked, turning to the refrigerator. “Go well with the chicken.”

“Sure,” Sirius nodded. “Sounds perfect, mon loup.”

Remus took a long breath as he opened the refrigerator doors, maybe taking longer than necessary to find the half & half. He was angry at himself. He didn’t know why the words were sticking to the back of his throat. He didn’t want pity, he supposed. He didn’t want Sirius to feel like he had to comfort him. Remus closed his eyes.

He’d do better.

Leo and Finn had their shoulders pressed together, each with their own book in their hands, when Logan opened the apartment door.

“Got the cream,” Logan raised the shopping back, and Leo all but leapt from the cushions.

“Yeah you do,” Finn said without looking up.

“Thank you,” Leo slid on his socks in his rush to get to Logan. He pressed his palms to Logan’s cold cheeks, kissing him in a quick burst. “Thank you, thank you, I love you.”

Logan smiled as Leo scurried back into the kitchen to finish making his part of the the American Thanksgiving dinner Pascal was hosting.

“I can’t believe I ran out,” Leo said, stirring something on the stove.

“It’s fine, Le,” Logan said, shrugging out of his jacket and following him in. “Happy to get you whatever you need.”

Leo turned, a touched pout on his face, and Logan beat him to it this time with a slower kiss of his own. Leo tasted like the caramel he had had them all taste test earlier and Logan licked into his mouth eagerly.

“I love you, too,” Logan mumbled.

Leo’s expression softened in the way it always did when one of them said that. Maybe Logan wasn’t the only one who couldn’t believe his luck.

“Want to peel sweet potatoes?” Leo asked with a hopeful grin, and Logan laughed.

“Sure, soleil.”

Finn gasped from the couch, eyes on his book, glasses on his nose. “They kissed. I fucking knew they would.”

Leo gasped, too. “No. Harzy, spoilers, you’re faster than me.”

Logan looked between them. “Are you guys reading the same book again, like, next to each other?”

“Sorry,” Finn said, but he was gripping the book like another secret might spill out. “And yes.”

Leo pressed a peeler into his hands with another kiss, this one fast and skittering across his cheekbone.

“I love both of you,” Logan sighed as he picked up the first potato. “You’re weird.”

Finn closed his book without marking his place and heaved himself up with a groan, cracking his back. He came to sit at the bar counter across from where Logan was peeling.

“Thanks for the help, Harz,” Logan said.

“I don’t like it when my hands smell like potato.”

Leo laughed. “Sweetheart, how’d you ever survive on your own?”

“Take out,” Finn and Logan answered at the same time.

“And catering,” Finn added. “I think the NHL is used to boys who can’t cook. Marlene just slid the caterer’s card into my hand without a word.”

Leo just shook his head. “She tried the same thing on me. Honey, please.”

Logan and Finn shared a smile, both turning to gaze at Leo’s back.

“How much time do we have?” Leo asked.

“Like, two hours, babe, you’re good,” Finn said.

“Do I have time to ravish you in your glasses?” Logan asked.

Finn raised a teasing eyebrow. “Oh, these old things? You want to wear them?”

Logan dropped his peeler and walked around the counter. He spun Finn to face him on the stool and Finn’s feet hooked around his calves, holding him there. “Non.”

Finn smiled, leaning forward to nip at Logan’s bottom lip and pull.

“Tremblay, potatoes.”

Logan groaned and Finn gave his butt a firm slap as he pulled away. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”

“Uh, hey dad,” Cole cleared his throat. “It’s me. I just um. I’m in Pascal Dumais’ house. Can you believe that? Uh, I just wanted to say…you know, happy Thanksgiving, and all that. Maybe you can come out to a game soon? Yeah…let me know, I can get you tickets. Okay. Okay, see you. Merry—or happy Thanksgiving. Yeah, okay. Bye.”

Cole sighed as he put his phone down and looked around the Dumais’ sitting room. It was tidy, with food laid out every table, ready for guests. Cole, after that phone call, already felt tired.

There was a knock on the doorframe and he turned to see Layla, smiling at him hesitantly. She held out a glass of a deep colored wine. “I thought maybe you’d want some.”

“Oh, I can’t, uh…” Cole began.

Layla snorted. “Me neither, but…” she glanced around the tall-ceilinged living room. “Who’s gonna tell? Dumo? Please.”

Cole laughed a little and took the thin stem from her fingers. “Thank you.”

Layla nodded, bending for a cheese and cracker. “That sounded a little tough. If you don’t mind me saying.”

Cole pocketed his phone. “It’s not really. Well…maybe now it is. But I don’t think of him that way, of this that way. He’s a good father.”

He sounded defensive even to himself and sighed. “When he decides to be.”

“He hard on you?” Layla asked. She took a seat on the couch and Cole glanced around before settling on the ottoman of one of the fat leather chairs. “About all this?”

“Hockey?” Cole said, then laughed. “No. No way, he doesn’t give a shit about ice hockey. My mom got me into hockey. My dad still hopes I’ll be, like, I don’t know…I don’t know what.”

Layla frowned. “It’s not like you could’ve been a money-bags doctor and chose to paint watercolors instead?”

Cole cracked a smile. “Yeah…Yeah, he sort of skipped around a lot before I actually started getting good.”

“Oh,” Layla said softly.

The doorbell rang. And then rang again and again, like someone was jamming their finger into it repeatedly.

“Tremzy!” he heard Katie shriek a moment later.

Warm voices filled the hall.

Cole rose and, after a moment, offered Layla a hand. She smiled, letting him pull her up. “It’s not as sob-story as it sounds.”

“I get it,” Layla nodded. “My older sister skipped altogether when I was little. Still don’t know why. I know it’s not the same but…”

“I’m sorry,” Cole said.

Layla just smiled, one of her bright ones, and wrapped her hand—gold rings and all—around his arm. “Come on. Shit’s about to get wild.”

“And delicious,” Cole said, turning towards the smells coming from the kitchen.

Layla laughed, and Cole wanted to hear that sound twenty more times.

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silenceofthecookies · 3 years

Note

Author san!!! Can I use my free pass for the Black bull team pleasee!! I am sure one piece requests will flood away but I wanna read about the black bulls team so much. Fluff/Romance HCs. It can be anything like first meetings or kiss idk what ever you wish and feel like writing. Its your choice. The black bulls, I love them so much especially Zora... I absolutely fell in love with his charecter design, his outfit and his personality. Sadly he is not that popular. Please do justice for him. Thankyou!!!

Hi Abhi! I’m so glad to see you requesting something for the Black Bulls, they are such an amazing squad! For this one I decided to go with first kisses, since I recently wrote more kissing headcanons and I think they’re surprisingly fun to write UwU Zora is up first, and since you mentioned him not being popular, I decided to put more of the less-popular Bulls in here! I hope you enjoy ❤

Zora Ideale

Behind his though exterior, Zora is actually a little bit of a romantic. He doesn't quickly grow attached to someone, let alone fall in love, but it happened. Zora believes you deserve someone better than him, but you picked him so he'll just have to be the best version of himself for you.

He'll make sure the setting is right for the first kiss. Some place away from people, some please you can relax. Probably one of your favourite places. A first kiss should be memorable, right?

He'll place his hand on your cheek and lean In slowly, giving you enough time to turn away in case you'd be uncomfortable. He half expects you to punch him in the face or something.

The kiss is soft, your lips just barely touching. Zora is a little worried he'd hurt you or make you uncomfortable, and his pointy teeth may or may not be part of that worry. He's not changing them though, he likes them this way.

When he takes his hand off your cheek after the kiss there's a stinkbug on there. Zora wouldn't be himself if he was a perfect gentleman, right?

Charmy Pappitson

Your first kiss with Charmy will be kind of spontaneous, a kiss that will surprise both you and Charmy. It will, however, also be a sweet one, in more ways than one.

You and Charmy will just be relaxing, eating something sweet Charmy has made. Cupcakes, donuts, anything. As you're both enjoying it and gushing over the taste, Charmy notices a bit of frosting/filling/whatever stuck just above your lips. She'll point it out, but instead of describing exactly where it is so you can remove it yourself, she'll grab her chance, quickly lean in and clean it up herself.

The kiss lasts about a second, it's over before you even realise what just happened.

Charmy herself is a little surprised at her sudden bravado and looks away with a blush on her face, rubbing the back of her neck nervously. She liked it alright, but what if you didn't like it?

She'll be so taken off guard by her own action, that you have the perfect opportunity to lean in and place a kiss on her lips, this time a proper one. Once your lips part, she will be laughing awkwardly, probably avoiding your eyes by looking at the sweets.

Asta

“Y/n! Can I kiss you?!”

It's Asta's typical stressed/flustered way of shouting and even though he asked you away from other people, you're pretty sure anyone within the vicinity has heard him yelling.

Once Asta falls in love, he wastes no time getting his feelings across. He has no problem proclaiming them to you, be in privacy or in front of others. Once he knows you return his feelings, he will be so ecstatic that he forgets everything else. Including that he wants to kiss you.

So somewhere between 30 minutes and 3 hours after he confessed, he will be asking you if he can kiss you. When you say yes, he'll step closer to close the distance between the two of you, put his hands, which you can feel are a little sweaty because of the nerves, on your cheeks and slowly closes the distance.

The kiss itself is very careful, Asta has no idea what he's doing and he doesn't want to do anything wrong either. First kisses are special, right? He keeps his lips pressed to yours for a few seconds before pulling away with a big grin.

Grey, Henry, Luck, Noelle, Gauche, Gordon and Secre after the cut!

Grey

Grey is just not doing it. She's way too embarrassed, and there's just no way she can get herself to ask you to kiss you. She'll consider catching you by surprise and just doing it, but what if you don't want a kiss? Or what if she does it wrong?

She's an absolute mess. She'll ask Gauche and Noelle for help, but their advice is simply ‘just ask it’ or ‘just do it’. It's no help to her, which only makes her believe even more that she's a lost cause.

She will make several attempts to ask you, but she just never can get any further than the word ‘can'. The stuttering already starts when she calls out your name to get your attention, and after a few attempts to ask ‘can I kiss you?’ the embarrassment becomes too much and she transforms herself into the big guy. She's not finishing that sentence and no matter how much you ask her about it afterwards, she won't complete it.

Ideally, she'll wait for you to kiss her first. It'll still be super embarrassing, but at least she won't be the one who has to make the moves.

Henry Legolant

Henry is a little hesitant about kissing you, he knows what effect he has on the people who come too close to him, but he really wants to! So he'll think about it for a good while before hatching a little plan.

On a moment when nobody is around, he'll call out your name, step closer to you slowly so you can step away if you become uncomfortable, slowly leans in when he's close enough and kisses you. He has his arms around you to support you, in case he's draining too much mana from you.

The kiss is soft and slow, and he stays close to you for a few seconds, not wanting to part from you too quickly. He tightens his hold on you a little, enjoying the rare feeling of being close, certainly this close, to someone.

He'll then hand you a little plate of food he had asked Charmy to prepare for him beforehand and step back to give you some space. It's Charmy's special food to restore mana. Of course Charmy was in on his plan, he had to tell her to get her to make something for him, and unknown to you she's sneakily watching through the keyhole of the door to see if their plan worked.

Luck Voltia

Luck didn't plan on kissing you today. Luck doesn't plan on anything. He always goes with the slow and his only goal is for the two of you to have fun. Aside from that, it really doesn't matter what happens. Though if fighting or pranks are involved, that's a plus! And that's exactly what put him in a good enough mood to kiss you.

The two of you had just played a huge prank and were running away from your poor victim, who seemed about ready to murder you. You were laughing like maniacs as you ran and you eventually lost them. The two of you now stood still, catching your breath and laughing.

That's when he does it, suddenly and unexpectedly. The kiss is story and sweet, gone as soon as you felt it. Just a little peck. Luck simply keeps smiling at you while you're trying to process what just happened. He'll start laughing at your reaction, and it makes you unable to stop yourself from laughing as well.

The whole situation is a little absurd, but there's no uncomfortable silences, no tension, no awkwardness. Just your boyfriend playing a little prank on you, one you certainly don't mind.

Noelle Silva

Noelle is going to do everything in her power to make you be the one to kiss her first. She's a royal, she shouldn't be the one making the first moves. Right?

She's tried to a few times, but she just gets too embarrassed every time and chickens out. Hence her new plan: make you want to kiss her. You're already attracted to her so it shouldn't be too hard, right?

She'll put some extra effort into looking pretty, and she'll try to bait you with things like a subtle with pretty lipgloss, or by leaving a little bit of food hanging on her lip. She's not the most subtle person, so her message should come across pretty easily. It's up to you whether you want to tease her a little about it and pretend to not notice, or to just give her what she wants.

If you keep ignoring her hints, she'll eventually find a moment to just tell you that you can kiss her. Mostly likely when you've gotten her something or done something for her.

“You did good, as a reward, you're allowed to kiss me.”

No, even though she said it, she's still not making that first move herself.

Gauche Adlai

Gauche is not a very subtle person. When he wants something, it's obvious. Usually he just makes sure he gets it too. You, however, are the one exception to that. The one person aside from Marie that he's careful with, about whose opinion he cares. So, instead of just kissing you right the moment when he feels like it, he waits a little.

He's not too worried about setting up a good romantic setting, that's not what matters anyway, it's the kiss that matters, but he does try to get some privacy for that moment. He doesn't need people commenting on him kissing you when he does, it's a pain in the ass.

But getting some privacy with the Black Bulls around is nearly impossible, and Gauche is struggling to even create such an opportunity. His patience runs thin pretty quickly, he just wants to kiss you already, so he pulls you away behind a corner, pulls you close to him and kisses you there.

The kiss is a little on the rough side, mostly due to Gauche's annoyance at the whole situation and at how long he had to wait. He calms down pretty fast though, now that he's gotten what he wanted.

Gordon Agrippa

Gordon usually goes with the flow, letting you take the lead, letting you set the boundaries. It was like that in his friendship with you, and it will continue to be like that in his relationship with you. However, you two have yet to have your first kiss and he's getting a little worried about it. So this time, he decides to make a move.

When the two of you are relaxed and away from prying eyes, he'll just talk to you about it. Not in a sad or an accusing kind of way, but in a way filled with curiosity. Were you shy? Were you uncomfortable? Did you just not want to? Were you waiting for him to make the first move? Despite the somewhat weird topic, it's a comfortable conversation.

Once you let him know you're comfortable with it, be it during that conversation or later, he'll carefully cup your cheek in his right hand, put his left hand around you to pull you close and then he'll kiss you in a soft yet sweet kiss. Nothing too overwhelming, just a relaxed and loving moment.

Mind the lipstick stains though. The other Bulls will have a riot when they see them.

Secre Swallowtail

Secre never really thought too much about kissing you. Sure, she loved you, but physical displays of affection are not really her forte, nor are they extremely important to her. She always figured that if you wanted to kiss, you'd come to her and kiss her, simple as that.

However, when Vanessa, be it in an alcohol-induced haze, informed her that kisses were needed to assure the other of your love for them, she got a little insecure. Was that the ramblings of a drunk woman? Or was there some truth in that and were you doubting her love for you?

She remembered Tetia and Licht, and how happy they seemed when they kissed, so there must be some truth in it at least, right?

So she asks you if it's bothering you. Expressing her emotions aren't her strongest point, but you can see some worry and uncertainty in her eyes. If you assure her you're fine, that's that. If you let her know in any way that you would like to kiss her though, she'll lean towards you and place a quick peck on your lips. The contact doesn't even last for a second, but Secre can't help herself from smiling. Maybe kisses were better than she thought.

#zora ideale x reader #charmy pappitson x reader #asta x reader #henry legolant x reader #luck voltia x reader #gauch adlai x reader #noelle silva x reader #gordon agrippa x reader #secre swallowtail x reader #grey x reader #black clover x reader #black clover imagine #cookie writes #headcanons #700 followers event #requested #vemuabhi #scheduled post

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agentravensong · 3 years

Text

a deltarune post-snowgrave au feat. noelle and a clown

I had this idea the other night sparked by watching a DeltaRune speedrun where Noelle was temporarily equipped with JevilsTail to boost her Magic for the second Berdly fight. I thought about how any items you equip to Noelle on the Weird / Snowgrave route are basically lost once she leaves the party.

And I then thought: what if, when Noelle's back in the light world, catching her breath after running out of the hospital, she hears something strange. Not Kris's voice, but not the other voice she heard coming from them either.

Then she feels something rustling in her pockets. She reaches in, knowing there should be nothing there, and pulls out a Joker card. It's smiling at her.

And thus, we have what I'm tentatively titling:

the Jevil on Her Shoulder AU.

More details + some doodles below the cut!

To put it more plainly, the premise is that Noelle gets equipped with Jevilstail during the Weird Route and still has it on her when she leaves the party post-freezing Berdly. Back in the light world, Jevil can talk to her and even, as long as they're in the dark, appear as his dark world self. How is he able to do this? Because, meta, AU, bullshit, that's why.

So Noelle gets someone who has knowledge of the kind of big picture stuff that she’s brushing up against. Someone who will make her life hell for his own amusement, but who also seems to be trying to help in his own way, and at least brings humor, levity, and a strange kind of solidarity.

And if he turns on her, or just ends up being more trouble than he's worth? Well...

She's got a pair of scissors that can nip that problem in the bud.

Also, Jevil is def trying to help Noelle get with Susie. But his dating experience is exclusively from Seam and, debatably, Spamton, both of whom he is obviously divorced from. So, it's not exactly his area of expertise.

Other miscellaneous stuff and underdeveloped ideas:

- Lots of fun potential shenanigans with Jevil learning about the Light World

- Jevil pranks Noelle as much as he can in his (initially) limited form. He wasn't prepared for Noelle to be so hard to scare, to even laugh at his stunts. They're both reminded of someone else. Someone they might have considered a friend.

- Noelle's scissors may or may not become ice spears in the dark world. Might change it to a weapon closer to a pair of scissors, if I can find one. EDIT: I think I'm actually gonna go with a pair of sabre-type swords, the ones with a curved handle/hilt, cause that's kinda scissor-like, right? Also I just like swords. And, I mean, a "Kris" vs Noelle sword duel? Sign me up!

- I would love to include Spamton in this, but he's unfortunately stuck as Ralsei's new scarf by virtue of how Weird Route ends. Though, I suppose there's nothing explicit in canon (yet) stopping her from stumbling on the dark world in the supply closet and having an actual conversation with the fluffy prince... and even without the Spamton connection, that would be an interesting scene to witness...

- That being said, Spamton not being around would allow for a convo like this:

jevil: say, did you ever meet a silly little salesman? noelle: ....uh. maybe. were you friends? jevil: oh no no, he's a little cringer. lol. noelle: oh, alright! well, i... may have... killed him. jevil:

So, pick your preference, I guess.

- Speaking of Spamton... remember how Noelle finds his glasses and the door to his shop somehow nostalgic? Perhaps she's had past experience with him and the others like him that she slowly remembers as she befriends Jevil. Re-befriends? :)

- Let's talk more about Suselle in this AU, cause I thought of a new layer to it: if we have a player who would equip Jevilstail to Noelle just for the magic boost, then they probably equipped it to Susie earlier as well. So we get to have a fun twist where Noelle doesn't want to tell anyone, especially Susie, that there's a clown in a card talking to her, but then Jevil's like "Oh yeah I know her!" Then when Susie catches on she's like "You're stuck with him??? geez that's... you want me to take him off your hands for you?"

And maybe Noelle initially says yes... But she's still not up to talk Snowgrave stuff with Susie at this point. Jevil is the only person she feels like she can talk to about it, partly because he's seemingly the only one who would understand, and partly because he doesn't judge her - and even if he did, it's not like he can do anything about it. And she needs someone to talk to about it.

So she asks for him back. But Susie and Jevil continue to have fun banter, with Susie on one hand being generally disconcerted by him, and on the other finding him more fun and relatable than she's comfortable with. And Susie and Noelle get to bond over having to deal with him :)

(There's some good analysis of Susie & Jevil as a pair out there to draw on here. A couple of examples:

https://evenmywordsare.tumblr.com/post/666601721530875904/peaktorielperformance-evenmywordsare-jevil-doing

https://neitherlightnordark.tumblr.com/post/666418601619832832/i-do-think-the-intricacies-of-jevil-and-susies)

- Maybe Susie could even be the one to bring Ralsei - and, by extension, Spamton - into this? Because she's worried about Noelle and not sure if Jevil being able to interact with them in the light world like this is a bad thing, so she goes to castle town and has a talk with him, and maybe arranges a future convo between him and Noelle. As they're planning it, Ralsei is trying to ignore Spamton in his ear begging him not to bring the clown in. Then, after Susie leaves, he and Ralsei have an actually meaningful, if brief, convo themselves.

- Jevil helps Noelle to enter (find, create) and explore more dark worlds. At first for fun and to maybe help her toughen up a bit, but then, after the two of them put together that her sister might be that one girl stuck in the dark world working for the big G man, maybe... to try and rescue Dess.

- For angst reasons, I like the idea of an eventual verbal confrontation between Noelle and Jevil (think an act 2 low point) launching into a battle, and suddenly (maybe not until after she's gotten hit a few times and cries for help?) there's a red heart helping Noelle to dodge Jevil's attacks. And the two of them have this shared "Oh shit" moment, with Noelle doing everything she can not to think about, and thus alert the soul to, the scissors in her pocket (because I imagine this fight happening in the light world... somehow).

- But I would like this story to end with a happy ending. With Noelle finding her freedom from "Kris"'s puppet strings, and maybe helping them and her other friends with it too while she's at it. With a hard-fought-for reunion with her older sister. With her recognizing the strength she always had was already enough, and learning to use it for her own ends. Plus, her getting with Susie, as is wonderfully inevitable.

- And with Jevil realizing that his world being limited and artificial doesn't mean that there's no value in forming attachments to and bonds with the things and people in it. With him perhaps patching up some old connections of his own, and finding something new to live for. People to care about, who care about him.

In summary: if Noelle has to go through the Weird Route in some timelines, she deserves a friend whom she can commiserate with, who's already in as deep as she is and has at least started to cope with it. And of course Susie will be there for her no matter what, but sometimes... look, sometimes, you need a clown.

I may eventually write something for this, but I'd love to see what anyone else who likes this idea wants to do with it too! In fact, if you make anything for it, please @ me (along with including a link back to this post, preferably) so I can check it out!

For a last little bonus, take this song Spotify reminded me of yesterday which fits this AU to an almost scary amount.

#deltarune #deltarune chapter 2 #deltarune spoilers #noelle holiday #jevil #snowgrave route #weird route #jevil on her shoulder #image descriptions in alt text #fair warning: if i see anyone try to turn this into a ship thing i'm ending you on the spot.#i do not know how to accurately draw jevil from the side. especially with the limited colors of a basic pencil #but on the other hand i am *very* happy with how all three noelles turned out!!!#...though i now realize that i forgot her freckles. rip

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fruitcoops · 3 years

Note

hiii i've just spent the last 36-48 hours reading your works and oh dear do i lOVE your writing and this universe :') . i dont know if you are taking requests but i think it would be kinda interesting (and low key hilarious) if you would write the lions reacting/reading thirst tweets? idk if this is a dumb idea or not but just like some of them reacting to them and going "well i'm actually gay/married so.. no!.. but thank you!"

Part two of the six-month celebration, everyone! Thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who submitted comments--I had over 60 come in, and while I couldn’t include them all, reading them was a true joy. The Lion Pride channel was something I started writing on a whim; I never expected it to grow like this <3 Much love to all of you!

TW for alcohol mentions and thirst tweets (nothing explicit)

“Why do I always fear for my life around you?” Sirius asked as Marlene settled into a cushy chair to the side of their table.

She smiled, catlike, and crossed her legs primly. “Because only Finn appreciates me.”

“That’s just the Aries connection, Cap,” Finn said with a smug grin.

“We’re both Leos, Harzy.”

“Eh, close enough.”

Remus raised an eyebrow at her. “You should probably start asking questions before this devolves further, Marley. He’s gonna keep digging himself a hole and we won’t get anything done.”

Marlene’s smile returned with a vengeance. “That’s where you’re wrong, Loops! We’re not doing any questions at all today.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Read it and weep.” She tossed a small posterboard at him like a frisbee; he caught it, barely, though both Talker and Sirius had to duck out of the way. Marlene faced the camera and winked. “Welcome back to Lion Pride, everyone! Today I’m here with Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter, Thomas Walker, and our wonderful cubs to react to your comments on our videos!”

“Bet you thought we’d never see ‘em, huh?” James asked.

“The comments fall into four categories: thirsty, funny, mean, and sweet. I will be reading two of those groups, and my lovely fiancée will be reading the others because she is the human embodiment of sunshine.”

“If you make Dorcas read the mean ones, I’ll be sad,” Leo laughed.

Marlene gave him a look of disbelief. “You think I’m passing up a chance to roast you guys? Puh-lease. We’re starting off strong with some thirsty, thirsty comments! Loops, you’re up first.”

“This is going to be fun,” Sirius said, leaning back in his chair.

She cleared her throat, then turned a smoldering look on their table. “I didn’t know I had a freckle kink, but then Remus Lupin appeared and now here we are.”

“Oh, shit,” Remus muttered, covering his face with his hands as the others howled with laughter.

“Lupin has been looking sexy as hell on the bench for years now. I'm so glad people are simping over him like he deserves,” Marlene read. “And there’s a little heart emoji, just for you.”

“This is every one of my nightmares come to life,” Remus said, though his voice was muffled by his forearms.

James lifted his glasses to swipe away the tears of mirth that had gathered in his eyes. “Are you kidding? This is everything I have ever wanted.”

“Y’know, it is so good to see people drooling over this hot piece of ass at last,” Finn sighed, reaching over to ruffle Remus’ hair as his face turned bright red.

“One more, and it’s a good one,” Marlene warned. She licked her lips, then had to take a moment to laugh before speaking. “I feel like Remus Lupin is the type of guy to bake you muffins—”

“Accurate,” Leo said.

“—but is also a kinky motherfucker.”

Remus’ mouth dropped open as the table erupted into cheering. Logan pumped both fists in the air and Sirius was laughing so hard no sound came out; Talker sank so low in his chair that only his head and shoulders were visible as he applauded.

“Why do people comment these things?” Remus asked, barely above a whisper. “Holy fuck, I’m engaged!”

“Speaking of…” Marlene raised her eyebrows and Sirius smile drooped.

“Oh, no.”

“Oh, yes. Buckle up, Cap!” She rolled her shoulders out. “Get someone who looks at you the way Sirius Black looks at a hockey puck.”

Remus snorted; James’ laugh was so short and sharp that it set everyone else off as well. “That sounds like I have a hockey puck fetish!” Sirius complained. “Which is so, so not true!”

Finn made an ‘ehh’ noise, and he leaned around Remus to smack the back of his head. “Hey!”

“Next one!” Marlene announced. “Sirius Black was my bi awakening.”

A beat of silence passed. “Is that it?” Sirius ventured, looking nervous.

“Yep.”

“Aw, man, that one’s lame,” Talker said, shaking his head. “Everyone thinks Cap is a little hot.”

Remus shot him a look. “A little?”

“Fair. Marley, I dare you to find one person who wouldn’t tap that.”

She rolled her eyes. “Me, though that dovetails nicely into the last one for our lovely captain. Ahem. I understand why Remus is with Sirius: he's hot as hell and rich, I'd hit that too.”

“Oh, fuck, you’re right,” Leo gasped. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

Finn and Logan turned to him in unison with a mix of disbelief and offense written all over their faces. “Dude.”

“First of all, Leo, you found yourself two hot rich boys,” Remus interrupted. “Second, that comment is forgetting that he’s funny, and smart, and nice, and—”

Seconds after the initial cover, Sirius took his hand off Remus’ mouth as if he’d been burned. “Did you just lick me?”

“Moving on! This is in all caps, so be prepared.” Marlene shuffled through her posterboards and turned to Leo with an ominous smile. He glanced toward the camera in mild fear. “What does a person have to do to get some hockey player ass?! Like why is Leo Knut so fine?!”

“Amen!” Logan called as Leo blushed.

“According to six of the seven people at this table, the answer to that first question is to be a hockey player,” Talker laughed. “The world may never know the answer to the second, sadly.”

“Lily could play hockey,” James said, resting his chin on his hand. Every single one of the others rolled their eyes. “She could! She’d be so good at it, too.”

“We know,” Finn groaned. “You only mention it every other day.”

“Speaking of the lovely Mrs. Potter,” Marlene began with a sly look as she held up a new card. “Do James and Lily Potter need a third? Asking for me specifically.”

James paused, dumbstruck, while the others drummed their hands on the table. “…no?”

A general sigh of disappointment went up. “I was really hoping he’d say yes,” Leo said.

“Ask Lily next time,” Remus recommended.

James turned to him and blinked slowly. “What are you insinuating, Loops?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“Don’t worry, James, you’ll like this one,” Marlene assured him. “James Potter is the ultimate dilf.”

“You’re damn right I am!” James whooped. “Vindication, bitches!”

“Marley, what have you done?” Talker whispered. “He’ll never shut up about that, now.”

“Oh, never,” James all but cackled. “I’m officially a dilf, you guys!”

“I hate you,” Sirius groaned.

“Tremzy, are you ready? We’ve got a couple very special ones for you,” Marlene said.

“Anything to get us out of this hell,” Logan begged.

“In that case: Logan Tremblay’s ass is better than Sidney Crosby’s. I said what I said.”

A pleased flush rose to his cheeks as Finn and Leo high-fived over his head. “Really? Thank you!”

“And they would be correct!” Finn announced. “Best ass in the league.”

“Come on,” Remus scoffed, though he was smiling.

Marlene cleared her throat to get their attention. “I don’t think I can legally read this on air without being censored or getting the video taken down, but…”

She turned the board around; all seven of them leaned forward to read it, then slowly looked at Logan, who turned vivid red. “Mon dieu. Is that—someone commented that on a video? Like, for people to see?”

“I feel like I need to bleach my eyes,” Sirius said just as Finn began shaking with silent laughter.

Leo’s face fell. “You wrote that, didn’t you?”

“I did,” Finn wheezed, scooting forward to fist-bump Marlene. “We wanted to see what you guys would say. Fuckin’ hell, your faces.”

“Alright, Talkie, are you ready?” Marlene asked around her laughter. “Seeing Thomas Walker with a baby makes me want to have his babies…please hit me up.”

He held up his index finger and took a second to laugh before responding. “If that’s Noelle, yes. If that’s anyone else, I’m flattered, but absolutely not.”

Logan made a face. “Ew.”

“We have two more,” Marlene warned. “For some very special people that aren’t here today, but I think you’ll like them anyway.”

Sirius narrowed his eyes. “I don’t trust the look on your face.”

“Daddy Dumo makes me swoon.”

A muddle of horrified noises echoed through the studio as all seven of them cringed. “Oh, my god, that’s my dad!” Logan yelped, covering his ears. Sirius looked vaguely ill and Remus’ shoulders crept toward his ears; James shuddered.

“The worst part is, we all know he can get it,” Finn said with a grimace. “God, I feel like I just heard someone talking about my parents having sex.”

“I’m sure he’ll love to hear that,” Marlene laughed. “Last one, from one of our truth or drinks.”

Remus went pale half a second too late. “N—”

“Hope Lupin is a milf.”

A broken noise escaped his mouth and he clamped his hand over it while Talker rubbed his back in sympathy. Sirius shook his head. “Somehow, that’s worse than Dumo’s.”

“Whoever sent that in, show some respect!” Leo said indignantly as Remus bonked his forehead against the table. “Hope Lupin is a lovely woman!”

“I think they noticed that particular fact,” Marlene pointed out, earning herself several scandalized shouts of her name and a whine from Remus. “That’s all we have for thirst comments! Are you ready for some funny ones?”

“Anything,” Remus pleaded. “I am begging you, anything else.”

Marlene shook her head as she stood, still smiling, and kissed Dorcas on the cheek when she entered the frame. “Go for it, love.”

“Dorcas!” they all cheered, lighting up immediately.

“Hey, guys, it’s been a while!” She curled up in Marlene’s vacant spot and took her own posterboards out from underneath the seat. “Alright, let’s rock and roll. Pascal Dumais is the team dad and nothing will change my mind, and Tremzy is the annoying youngest child.”

“That is so accurate,” Sirius laughed, leaning just out of range of Logan’s playful punch. “Whoever commented that has no idea how right they are.”

“We’ve got a whole sibling dynamic thing going on,” Talker agreed. “Tremzy’s the baby of the family, Cap is the quietly chaotic middle child, and Pots is the older brother that starts shit and inevitably gets blamed for however out-of-control it gets.”

Dorcas nodded. “You are one hundred percent correct. In a similar vein: Pots was the dad jokes friend before he was even a dad.”

“Painfully so,” Leo confirmed, shaking his head as they all groaned in agreement. James looked rather smug about the whole thing. “So many puns.”

“Oh, you’ll like this one,” Dorcas mused as she drew a new card. “If Tremzy looked directly into my eyes for even two seconds, all of my problems would be solved. I am sure of it.”

“Yes,” Finn and Leo said in unison.

“It’s something about the eyes, I think,” James added. “They just stand out so much that it’s a little startling straight-on.”

Logan looked to the camera and stared at it, unblinking; it zoomed in slightly on his face. “Everything will be fine,” he said with mock solemnity. “Your problems are solved.”

“Well, that was terrifying,” Sirius said drily. “Got any more for us, Ms. Meadowes?”

“Of course I do! We’ve got quite a few for Loops and Leo.” She took a sip of her water before getting comfortable again. “My favorite thing about these videos is that we can all see Loops get steadily buffer as the season goes on. Good for you, king!”

“Flex! Flex! Flex!” the six of them chanted; Remus rolled his eyes, but slid his sweater sleeve to his elbow and flexed his forearm, resulting in enough hoots and hollers that they could probably be heard a block away. Talker fake-swooned into Leo’s arms and Remus lightly whacked him on the shoulder.

“Remus Lupin looks like he has squishable cheeks,” Dorcas read aloud.

“He does!” James cooed, scooting over and reaching out.

Remus narrowed his eyes. “I swear to god I’ll bite you.”

Sirius cupped his face between his palms and kissed his nose, then pinched both his cheeks gently. “Ta-da!”

“How many of these do we have?” Remus asked, though his voice was a bit muffled by Sirius’ hands.

“Just one more for you, and it’s my personal favorite.” Dorcas assured him. “I love how the team probably had no impulse control until Loops joined.”

Sirius let go of his face and dissolved into laughter as Finn nearly fell on the floor. “Oh my—you think he has impulse control?” Talker slapped the edge of the table as he shook his head. “Absolutely not. Hell no, Loops is the first person to do stupid shit with us.”

“Yeah, I just don’t get caught,” Remus added around his own laughter. “Everyone thinks I’m such a hardass goody-two-shoes and it lets me get away with so much more than you delinquents.”

“Speaking of delinquents,” Dorcas continued. “This one is from our ‘Taste Testing Sexy Alcohol’ video: ah, yes, now I know how to do a body shot. 10/10, very educational video.”

“Do not take educational advice from us,” Finn blurted instantly. “I know this is a joke, but please exercise caution. That video was a ton of fun but a nightmare to recover from.”

Sirius winced at the memory. “I took two naps and then wished for death for a full day.”

“On a lighter note, who’s ready for some Knutty appreciation?” Dorcas smiled at her cards. “I've only had Leo Knut for a season and half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.”

“Big mood,” four of them said simultaneously.

Leo turned to the camera with a concerned look on his face. “That’s a meme reference, but are y’all okay?”

“No,” Dorcas answered. “Especially not this next person: Sometimes I do something productive and then I remember @LeoKnut is a 19 year old professional athlete who radiates happiness and with two of the hottest boyfriends the good lord has made, and then my bowl of packaged ramen seems less impressive.”

“I’m proud of your ramen,” Leo said, even as the corners of his mouth twitched in a smile. “And I appreciate the note about my boyfriends, because they are definitely the hottest people the good lord has made.”

Talker stuck his lip out in a pout. “Rude.”

“Sorry, Talkie, I’m biased.”

“Last one before Marlene comes back, so you’d better enjoy it!” Dorcas announced. “Did the Lions effectively utilize girl power when they wrecked toxic masculinity, yes or yes?”

“Can we utilize girl power?” Remus wondered, resting his shin on his hand. “Isn’t that exclusively for, y’know, women?”

“We can utilize himbo power,” Finn suggested.

James gave him an offended look. “Not all of us are himbos!”

“Okay, but you definitely are.”

“I am not!” James held up his fingers to count. “There are only, like, three qualifications, right? I might be strong, hot, and respectful, but I’m not dumb so it doesn’t count!”

“Pots,” Remus said quietly, hiding his smile for half a second. “Buddy, that was four things.”

James paused, then sighed in resignation. “Ah, fuck, I’m a himbo.”

“You really are.”

“At least we don’t promote toxic masculinity.”

They raised their waterbottles in a ‘cheers’ motion as Marlene and Dorcas switched spots; Marlene stretched her arms over her head and grabbed the new boards. “I’m back, beloved himbos. Talker, Leo, you are beloved by the people and have no mean comments. Cap, we’re starting with you.”

“Are they actually mean mean?” he asked.

“Sirius Black seems like a little bitch. Not in a bad way, necessarily. He just. Seems like he'd be a little bitch."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. “Oh, okay. That answers one question.”

“He’s not a little bitch,” Leo said. “Pouty on occasion, but not a little bitch.”

Remus gave him a long look, then shook his head. “Yeah, I mean, you teared up a little when Hattie got a splinter in her paw but didn’t even yell when you almost sliced your finger off while making dinner.”

“Duality of man,” Finn said sagely.

Marlene cocked an eyebrow. “Finn O’Hara’s hair kind of reminds me of Garfield the Cat.”

“Alright, that’s just rude.”

“It does not!” Logan gasped at the same time Leo made a noise of agreement.

Finn turned to him in utter betrayal. “Nutter Butter, I thought you liked my hair!”

“I do!” Leo defended. “But they’re not entirely wrong. It’s very orange in the sun.”

“I’m never going to forget that,” Finn muttered, staring at the floor.

“Ugh, it bothers me so much that Lupin just objectifies Black all the time!” Marlene read in a high-pitched, nasal voice. “No respect in that relationship!”

Sirius raised his eyebrows. “Pardon?”

Marlene stared at it for a moment, then shrugged. “Yeah, I have no idea what videos they were watching. Do you feel objectified in your relationship, Cap? I know the opinion of total strangers really bothers you a lot.”

“I’m really glad you picked up on that,” he said with false gravity. “Yeah, it’s such a bummer when my hot fiancé says I look nice. Such a blow to my self-esteem.”

“That was supposed to be a roast against me,” Remus said, looking amused. “Talk about backfiring.”

“Are you ready, Pots? This one’s pretty brutal,” Marlene warned. James nodded and Finn linked their hands for moral support. “James Potter is a swiftie and you cannot tell me otherwise.”

He furrowed his eyebrows. “…yeah? That’s true? T Swift is a regular occurrence on the locker room playlist.”

“Also, James Potter looks like someone who would think black pepper was spicy.”

“Now that one is mean,” he complained as the others burst out laughing. “It’s not my fault I have sensitive taste buds!”

“Oh, honey,” she said under her breath as she took a new card. “Get ready, Tremzy. This first one is short and sweet: Logan Tremblay looks like a lesbian.”

“That is not an insult,” Logan laughed. “Every lesbian I know is rad as fuck. I wish I looked that good in a leather jacket.”

“I just realized Logan doesn’t look short cause he’s next to bunch of hockey players, he’s short cause he’s 5’9.”

The smile slipped off his face in a millisecond as the others roared with laughter. “Quoi?”

“Oh, she got you good,” Sirius gasped, patting his shoulder clumsily. “Holy fuck, can I frame that?”

“That’s not what it says.” An edge of distress appeared in Logan’s voice. “Marley, that’s not what it says.”

James sat on the floor with the heels of his palms pressed against his eyes. “You’re fucking—whoever sent that in, you are my new favorite person. Jesus.”

“Do you need a second to recover before we move on?” Dorcas asked as she draped her arms over the back of Marlene’s chair. “The next one is our biggest section by far.”

“It’s the sweet ones, yeah?” Leo asked.

“Right.”

“It might be a good idea to do those before Lo spontaneously combusts.”

“Agreed!” She swapped with Marlene and hauled a short stack of posterboards out from their hiding place with a smile. “A hug from Dumo can probably solve any issue.”

“Facts,” Logan said. “I could really use one right about now, too.”

“Has anyone noticed how blue Leo Knut’s eyes are?”

“Yes,” the six of them chorused.

Finn gave him a dreamy look. “Every single day.”

“When I first read this one, I thought I wrote it,” Dorcas said with a snort. “Someone give Marlene a raise. No reason why, I just love her.”

“Can we do that?” Sirius asked, looking toward the camera crew. “Can we lobby to give you guys raises? Because you definitely deserve it after all the bullshit you deal with to make these videos watchable, and Marlene, you’ve drawn the short end of the stick ninety percent of the time.”

“How?” she called off-screen.

“You have to actually talk to us and try to get answers.”

“Fair.”

Dorcas finished scribbling something down on her notepad. “Just making a note of this conversation for future reference. Moving on! Sirius Black and James Potter are a prime example of hockey husbands, and I adore them.”

“The ironic part of that is that we’re both in committed relationships, but we’re basically married,” James mused.

Remus shook his head. “You guys are so married. Lily wanted to get you matching rings for your birthday, Pots.”

“That would be so cool!” they said in perfect unison. Remus turned to the camera and spread his hands in a case in point motion.

Dorcas stifled her laughter before moving on. “This one is cute. Give Remus Lupin all the hugs! I feel like I could tell him he’s an inspiration and he’d be so nice about it—” She paused to glance up at them. “—this next bit is in parentheses: all the LGBT Lions give me that vibe, but Cap and Knutty are super intimidating so I wouldn’t have the guts.”

Leo’s face fell and Sirius’ eyebrows pitched. “I’m not intimidating!” Leo protested. “I thought we already went over that! Loops gives fantastic hugs, but I want some, too.”

“He definitely deserves all the hugs in the world, but I promise I’m nice,” Sirius said, a bit softer than usual. “Is it because we’re tall?”

Dorcas half-shrugged. “Probably. It’s a little startling at first. Oh, I could’ve written this one, too: The Venn diagram of men I trust and the Gryffindor Lions is a full circle.”

Talker beamed at the camera. “Thank you!”

“So many hockey guys are such douchebags,” Logan said with a shake of his head. “I’m really glad we don’t do that shit.”

“Me, too.” Dorcas slid her old card under her chair. “Sirius Black’s hair looks so soft and I just want to touch it so bad.”

“It is so soft,” Remus agreed immediately. “You have no idea.”

“Everyone wants to touch Cap’s hair,” Finn said, sighing. “It’s so majestic.”

“I need a haircut.”

“No, you don’t,” Remus said as he tugged a stray curl. Sirius hummed.

“This one is from the interview some you did with Jules and Katie: these hockey boys being so soft with kids is my aesthetic! Like, it’s just so adorable to see these big, intimidating dudes be so, so sweet! Love them all!” She turned the card for them to see. “And then they added a heart at the end.”

“It’s impossible to be around those kids and not be happy,” James said. “They’re just too cute and wonderful.”

“Yeah, I love kids.” Finn nodded. “Especially the Dumais and Jules. They’re a hoot.”

“Jules would die if he heard you say that,” Remus laughed. “The hero worship is still going strong with most of you.”

“This one made me laugh when I first read it, but it’s really sweet,” Dorcas informed them. “Anyone else feel like we were deceived these past five years into thinking Cap was this hard-ass man, when in reality he's a cuddle bug who definitely captures and releases spiders instead of squishing them?”

“You weren’t deceived, I was just closeted,” Sirius said. “Also, I absolutely squish spiders.”

Remus gave him a look. “No, you do not. That’s my job. I’m the catch and release person if I can get away with it.”

James shook his head. “The third week of practices you saw a spider and threw me at it.”

“You did what?” Finn asked.

“There was a spider in my stall,” Sirius sighed, looking as if he would rather be anywhere else. “And Pots and I were talking so I didn’t see it until I almost sat on it, and my brain decided the only logical thing to do would be to grab him and shove him toward the spider.”

“That was after you shrieked,” Talker added. “Like, literally shrieked. I’ve never heard anyone make a noise like that.”

“Alright, alright,” Sirius grumbled. “We get it, I don’t like spiders.”

Remus shrugged. “But you are a cuddle bug. They got that part right.”

“We’re in the final two!” Dorcas announced. “This one has some pictures to go with it, so it’s on my phone. Fuck Romeo and Juliet, I want what these bitches have.”

“It’s us!” Leo cooed as the phone made its way down the line. In the upper corner of the screen, the photo appeared—it had been taken in New York, and Logan’s whole face was alight with happiness as Leo and Finn each pressed a kiss to his cheek. The camera caught him mid-laugh, so his eyes were closed and his chin was tucked slightly into Finn’s Strand hoodie.

“That’s my screensaver,” Finn said with a grin, pulling his phone out and turning it toward the camera without moving away from Leo. “One of my favorites.”

“I forgot you took that one,” Logan murmured. He hooked his chin over Leo’s shoulder and kissed his cheek; the four others at the table gave soft are you seeing this? looks to the camera and Dorcas smiled.

“Pots, I think yours is next. I hate to break it to you, Talkie, but they didn’t get any of you and Noelle.”

“We don’t take a ton of pictures together,” Talker said as James took the phone. “I mean, we take a bunch of selfies, but we don’t live close enough to each other to actually post that often. What picture is it, J?”

James was staring down at the picture with an unbearably sweet expression. “It’s our wedding. That’s my favorite one, actually.”

Like Logan, they had been captured while laughing—Lily was bent slightly at the waist as James clapped, his glasses just as askew as the flower crown on her head. It was impossible to tell who had told the joke originally, but they were both radiant in the sunset.

“That’s a really good one,” Sirius said with an unreadable look on his face.

“Well, well, well, fancypants, you two got a video.” James wiggled his eyebrows and Remus leaned in to see.

“What kind of video? One of our tikt—oh. Oh, this is so cute.” He shifted his chair over as the short edit began to play. “D, who made this?”

“A fan.”

“It’s really impressive,” Sirius said without taking his eyes off the screen. The edit was a series of photos, both on and off the ice; Sirius knocking their helmets together, then Remus looking back over his shoulder, then both of them in the water playing chicken in the sun. It was a slideshow of their life and their love.

“Can you send that to me?” Remus asked when it was over. “Cause that’s super cool.”

“Sure thing. Are you guys ready for the last one?” When they all nodded, she drummed her fingers on the posterboard and cleared her throat. “Arthur appreciation hours. He deserves it after managing to control the team.”

A cheer went up—all seven stood and applauded, half-laughing and half-whooping. “Miracle worker!” Sirius called.

“Best coach in the league!” Finn added.

“Most tolerant man to ever walk the earth!” Remus raised his water in a toast and they tapped the plastic edges together, nearly spilling all over the table.

Dorcas’ eyes crinkled in a smile as she turned to the camera. “That’s it for today, Lions! Tune in next time for more content of our boys, and thank you for such wonderful comments!”

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sage-nebula · 3 years

Text

Thinking about all the clues in canon that Susie is an orphan who, before the game started, never had any friends or anyone who really cared about her (with their care for her being known to her), such as:

— At the beginning of Chapter 2, Ralsei reveals that he has set up rooms for Susie and Kris in his castle, so that the Dark World can be like “a second home” to them. When Susie sees her room, she spends a moment marveling about how she has her own room and awkwardly asks Ralsei how long he spent setting it up for her. After that, she’s overjoyed about how cool it is, bragging about it to both Kris and Lancer. While it could be that she just likes the room, the emphasis she puts on it being her own room makes it seem like this might be the first time she’s ever had a room to herself. Which, to be fair, Kris shared their room with Asriel as well, but the room Kris shared with Asriel was still their room, at least on one side of it. If Susie is from a group home, it could be that she never even had that much to herself.

— Susie seems to care greatly for Toriel, but in Chapter 1 also seems a bit jealous of Kris for being Toriel’s child. In Chapter 1, after Susie threatens Kris about biting their face off, she stops and says, “Nah. Kris, you have a good mother. It’d be a shame to make her bury her child.” If you try to skip school instead of going to the closet after that, Susie stops Kris by saying, “If you skip school, your mother will have a heart attack.” In both cases, Susie is expressing care for Toriel’s emotional well-being; however much Susie might not care for others, she does care about Toriel enough to not want to stress her out. Keeping in mind that all of this happens before the first Dark World trip, it can’t be explained away by Susie’s character development like Susie’s eagerness to bake a pie with Toriel (and otherwise adherence and respect that she shows for Toriel) in Chapter 2 can.

But going along with that, when you follow Susie to the closet in Chapter 1, Susie mocks Kris by saying, “Not used to walking without someone holding your hand? Come on, freak.” Given the respect and care Susie has already shown for Toriel, it’s clear that her mocking of Kris here is not because Kris should be ashamed for holding Toriel’s hand; rather, it could be jealousy that Susie doesn’t have someone to do that for her, and perhaps never did. It’s easier to call Kris a freak for having a loving mother who holds their hand than it is to admit that she wishes she had the same.

As a final note on the Chapter 2 interactions, Susie is surprised that Toriel knows her name and remembers her. This, in addition to her eagerness to help out with the pie, her laughing at Toriel’s jokes, etc, shows that Susie has a fondness for Toriel, who is the most motherly character in the series. Considering that Toriel acts kind and motherly toward Susie, the idea that Susie might not have never had a mother (+ people to care about her) suggests that her fondness for Toriel (+ jealousy of Kris) contributes to how quickly she latches onto / how much she cares about Toriel.

— Susie eats chalk, and while this could be a “haha monster snack” joke, not only do we not see other monsters eating chalk (in fact, Noelle thinks Kris is lying to her if you choose to tell Noelle this about Susie at the end of Chapter 1), but eating chalk can be a sign of a nutrient deficiency. Specifically, craving chalk can be a result of an iron deficiency. If Susie is an orphan who hasn’t had parents to take care of her, then she could have an unbalanced / nutritionally deficient diet, and thus she does things like eat chalk in an effort to make up for it. (Her jeans are also ripped up, and while distressed jeans are cool, it’s also possible those are the only pants she has.)

— While the other kids in Alphys’ class openly detest Susie (e.g. laughing at Kris for being paired with her, warning Kris about possible death at Susie’s hands, refusing to hang out with Kris if Kris is hanging out with Susie, etc), Monster Kid tells a story to Kris in Chapter 1 that suggests that, at one time, Susie might have wanted to be friends with them. Specifically, if you talk to Monster Kid at the end of Chapter 1, Monster Kid tells Kris about a time when the kids from Alphys’ class (sans Kris) were playing kickball in the street. MK says that Susie was “standing in a corner” staring at them, but that when the ball did get kicked over to her, she froze before kicking it so hard that it hit Undyne’s car. Monster Kid doesn’t say what Susie did after that (only that Alphys came out and kicked all their asses at the game), but does go on to insult Susie some more, and notes that Kris looks increasingly annoyed at the insults. Regardless, the thing to take away from this story here is that Susie was watching all the other kids play, and froze when the ball came to her. She kicked it . . . and it hit Undyne’s car. Monster Kid’s retelling of the story suggests that they and the other kids thought that Susie did that on purpose, but my interpretation (knowing Susie as I do now, and also knowing what it’s like to watch other kids play while not feeling invited to play yourself) suggests that it was probably an accident. Susie wanted to play and be included, but accidentally kicked the ball into the car, and was thought of as a freak and bully after despite her actual intentions.

— To that end, at the start of Chapter 1 Susie is pretty blatantly of the opinion that everyone hates her and wants her to get kicked out of school. She flat out says as much to Kris in front of the lockers at the start of the chapter. (“Everyone wants it. Everyone’s waiting for it.”) It’s not only the other students, either; Alphys is afraid of Susie and uses any opportunity she can to get Susie out of class, which would explain why Susie doesn’t hold nearly the same care or respect for her that she does for Toriel, someone who actually did care about and treat Susie with kindness.

— Susie expresses shock when Lancer wants to be like her / wants to be her friend, and in turn, latches onto him with fierce loyalty that is only momentarily shaken when she thinks he’s betrayed her (and she even reasons that with, “why would anyone want to be my friend?”). That line, suggesting that she feels stupid for thinking Lancer would want to be her friend, points to a friendless background. But her fierce loyalty to anyone who shows her even a bit of kindness also shows just how incredibly lonely she is. In fact, if we think about it, the people who Susie latches onto are those who have shown her some big act of kindness before:

Noelle: Lent Susie the candy cane pencil and smiled at her. Considering how the other kids in Alphys’ class treat Susie, the simple act of lending a pencil with a smile probably seemed like a huge act of kindness to her.

Toriel: Acts motherly toward Susie, as she does with all her students. Might not be special treatment in the grand scheme, but it’s special to Susie who typically doesn’t get that treatment from others.

Lancer: Said that he wanted to be like Susie, that he found Susie cool, wanted monogrammed track jackets with her, etc. Actually wanted to be Susie’s friend and appreciated her.

Kris: Defended Susie from the King’s attack. Note that although Susie was working with Kris before this, she wasn’t to the level of calling Kris her friend before Kris defended Susie. Also note that this is not an action that we, the player, make Kris do; Kris does it on their own regardless of the choices the player makes.

Ralsei: Healed Susie’s injured leg after Susie fell from the trash heap in Chapter 2. Granted, Susie was being nice to Ralsei before that and seemed to consider him a friend (enough), but it was only after Ralsei went out of his way to heal Susie’s injury and offered to teach her healing magic that she yoinked him off to spend time alone with him in the city and wanted to bust out of prison to find him when she thought he was being tortured in Queen’s Castle. Ralsei showed Susie some dedicated kindness, Susie latched on for life.

The fact that it takes on gesture of care on someone else’s part for Susie to be willing to kill for a person suggests that not only has Susie not had friends before, but perhaps that her feelings of loneliness were mixed with rejection to the point where she latches on fiercely to these people who care for her and doesn’t let them go.

— In addition to all this, although Susie latches on strongly, she also seems to be worried about losing those connections, too. When Lancer seemingly betrayed her, she said “why would anyone want to be friends with me?” When they returned from the Dark World, Susie hesitantly asks Kris if they’ll still be friends even if it turns out the Dark World was just a dream (well, she doesn’t finish the thought, but it’s clear that’s what she was about to ask before she fled). In the Snowgrave Route, when Noelle flees Kris at the hospital, Susie assumes Noelle is fleeing because of her and expresses dismay that Noelle is “scared of [her] again.” Susie’s default is that people fear or hate her and will run at the first opportunity despite how she tries to keep them close, which again speaks to a history of loneliness and rejection.

— Susie got banned from Free Ham Sandwich Day. This is a throwaway joke line, but if you consider that Susie might be an orphan with food insecurity, it could be less that she was just stuffing her face to be a pig and more that she was eating as much as she could because she didn’t know when she’d be able to eat again. Considering that she also eats things like chalk, candy cane pencils, apple-scented shampoo, and moss . . . well, the idea that Susie is food insecure doesn’t seem too far-fetched. (Kris also eats moss if the player makes them, yes, but the player has to choose that. Susie just does it on her own.)

Anyway, none of this is Conclusive Evidence, of course, but I think there’s a lot to suggest that Susie could very well be an orphan possibly living in a group home, and that she’s never really had the love of family or friends before the game started. Her aggression is defensive aggression more than anything else and it’s pretty clear that she just wants to be loved and give love in return. Susie’s fantastic and I can’t wait to see what more we learn about her as the game goes on.

#deltarune #deltarune spoilers #dtr spoilers #dtr susie #meta #considering how judgmental Susie felt Ralsei was of her throughout most of Chapter 1 #(and tbh Ralsei *was* - he admits himself it took him time to realize Susie being Susie was great)#it's not surprising it took her the longest to warm up to him #but now they are besties and it's great

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the-white-soul · 3 months

Note

*Flowey mutters, feeling mighty embarrassed now about his favorite stories being fairy tales. Every else sounds so cool!He mutters his answer so people can barely hear.* I like James and the tomato stalk…

*He speaks louder and with more excitement now that that’s over with, adding onto it to make himself sound cooler.*

Uh, but I gotta agree with 1984! The torture scenes are so good. And the inner party has so much power over everyone else! That would have been so perfect to try out in one of my runs while I had the resets, but I imagine it'd need to take years to get to that point. I don't have that patience.

*He glances at Chara for a moment, then back to Kara. He might take up their offer to leave and talk about his their interests.* Hey, Kara? Do you know how much time do we have left before we resume? I wasn't to know if I have enough time for something.

(Kara) "Flowey, your favorite book sounds amazing! I mean technically Harry Potter's a fairy tale just made by a jackass! Anyways this should start in 10 minutes! We have time for whatever you have."

(Noelle) "Hey, Chara. Want to go on a quick walk!"

(Chara) "Why?"

(Noelle) "I think we should really take a walk Chara! *Whispered* To get away from them for a second."

(Chara) "Ah, okay! We're going on a quick walk!"

(Noelle) "*They walk out fast and Chara and Noelle are alone* Will you ever tell them the secret?"

(Chara) "My real question is, why haven't you? If it's because you feel bad about hurting Flowey..."

(Noelle) "No, it's something I can't trust you or anyone with."

(Chara) "Come on, I promise not to tell!"

(Noelle) "A promise like that isn't worth making."

(Chara) "Please! It's been nagging at me for years!"

(Noelle) "I've only been here a couple months."

(Chara) "Well, it felt like a year. I swear on Asriel's soul I won't tell anyone."

(Noelle) "You mean that?"

(Chara) "There are very few people I love more than Asriel. Of course, I mean it."

(Noelle) "Alright, I want to trap humans under a barrier."

(Chara) "What?"

(Noelle) "I've learned after seeing the atrocities committed by Clover that humans and monsters can't coexist. I wanted them to and tried my best but it didn't work. I knew the original barrier wouldn't work because humans hate everyone. So I thought to give the humans a piece of their own medicine with a few exceptions. Kara can stay since they're half both and deserve to be friends with Flowey. I could never tell them I'm Noelle because I'd rather they think I was dead than this."

(Chara) "What the fuck?!"

(Noelle) "That's all I'm saying right now."

(Chara) "No. That's not all you're saying. You can't just tell me you want to segregate humans and monsters, in the end. You've opened Pandora's box!"

(Noelle) "*Laughs a bit* Once I tell you how I'll achieve my goal, I'll never achieve my goal. ;). Now let's go back to Kara and Flowey. Oh and if you tell anyone about this, I'll kill you. Now let's go."

(Chara) "Fine. *Grabs Noelle's hand and tightens their grip until Noelle is in such pain she almost screams. They whispered* Because I put this on Asriel I'm not going to tell anyone but don't threaten me. I never promised not to kill you."

(Noelle) "Let go!"

(Chara) "No, let's just stay here a bit. *Makes sure no one's around and bites down hard on Noelle. They let her bleed out for a full minute. While this is happening Noelle can only stay in horror pleading with them to stop the pain. It hurts like a stab wound and almost gets infected.

(Noelle) "Please you made your point just stop it."

(Chara) "Did I make my point? I'm not so sure yet. You know for times like this I get some salt. *Grabs it and puts it right on the wound.* Do you like that?"

(Noelle) "I'll do whatever you want just stop this torture or I'll tell Kara!"

(Chara) "I'll tell them about your little plan then."

(Noelle) "You swore not to."

(Chara) "Asriel believes that I should've lived. He made me promise him that I'd never die for something stupid a long time ago. *Bites again.* If you're threatening me, you must be pretty stupid. *She starts to cry but Chara punches her until they stop. Then they whisper their final warning* Don't fuck with me. Now, let's get back to that court room. Oh and here's a butts pie. *Forcefedd it down her throat.* Now no one will know. Right, Noelle?"

(Noelle) "No one will know. *They walk back into the room. There is still 5 minutes left.*"

#undertale #the white soul #kara #flowey #ask flowey #noelle holiday #dess holiday #chara dreemurr #torture #Litteral salt on the wound #I don't know if I revealed to much here #If so #Can't take it back

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cellydawn · 4 years

Text

sans IS gaster (OR the sans theory masterpost pt. 2)

Part 1 || ❤️ || Part 3

(drawn by me, color by @magenteel)

Previously, we discussed: Sans and his hand in the destruction of a world, his connection to Ice-E and Deltarune, and how he relates to Gaster. We’re going to continue the thread we left off on.

Section III - Gaster (Cont.)

Snails are mentioned too many times throughout Undertale for them to not be of any significance. As it turns out, they are pretty important in unraveling the mystery behind Gaster and Sans.

When you enter the area with Napstablook’s snail farm, you’ll notice that Sans’s theme is playing despite him not making an appearance.

In one of Papyrus’s phone calls, he mentions that Sans recently bought snail-shaped pasta and says “He’ll probably fill them with hotdogs and slime.” Toriel also owns a book called “72 User for Snails”. Track 72 in the Undertale OST is “Song That Might Play When You Fight Sans”. That’s multiple times that Sans is likened to snails.

Snails belong under the taxonomic class Gastropoda. Gasterpods.

These long pauses between words and phrases are not unlike how Gaster speaks.

Here is Gaster speaking with us in the opening sequence of Deltarune. And...

Now. Let’s move on.

(More under the cut.)

Mus_smile is the track that plays in room_gaster. This is my personal opinion, but the character that is the most strongly associated with smiles is Sans.

And Sans is certainly intelligent enough to be the prime suspect for being Gaster. The proper name for his namesake is Comic Sans Microsoft, or Comic Sans MS. MS can also be used as a suffix for the name of a person who has a degree in a Master of Science.

Sans also owns quantum physics books. The subject of Gaster’s scientific research is revealed in Entry #17: “photon readings negative”. Photons are described as a "quantum" of electromagnetic energy, and are of course within the realm of study under quantum physics.

Gaster, like Sans, is brilliant yet slow-working. Slower than Alphys, who is repeatedly noted to have nothing to show yet as the royal scientist in the eyes of the people and is shown to slack off constantly.

Gaster is implied to have perished, and I suppose he did, in a way, if these speculations do end up being correct. However, there’s something more to this statement. Ghosts are sort of in the realm of being not-alive, and Sans and Napstablook have a surprising level of comparability.

They both:

Get likened to “garbage”

Have connections to snails (Napstablook runs the snail farm)

Speak completely in lower case

Pretend to sleep and say “Z’s” out loud

Have black “sclera”

And the black sclera is also a topic of its own; it’s equated with the status of being brought back to life. Being “determined”. (See: Asriel and Undyne)

Undyne is especially suspect due to the strange right-eye-phenomenon she has in common with Sans, with spears shooting out of hers. Spears that are actually colored light blue, not unlike Sans’s eye.

To recap:

Sans and Gaster are heavily involved in Deltarune

They have been displaced from time and space

They have connections to snails

They are both doctors with knowledge in quantum physics

They both “fell” into the abyss

They both talk similarly

They are both slow

They are both characterized by their smile

They are both some degree of dead

Sans is Gaster or a significant piece of him. Sans has Gaster Blasters because they belong to him. If all prior conjecture proves true, he is and will be responsible for the destruction of a world or THE world within Deltarune. After all, the Latin definitions of “gaster” and “sans” are to destroy and to be without, respectively.

That brings us to the next subject: why is Sans Sans? More specifically, why is that his name? Why even change his name?

Below is the Japanese version of the fun event with Sans’s phone call. It features completely different dialogue from its English counterpart.

Am I Licca-chan? (Select No) Then from now on call me Sans. I need to check every once in a while. I won’t know when my name has changed.

“Licca-chan” is a well-known Barbie-esque dress-up doll in Japan, so popular to the point where it is even used as a synonym for other dolls from different companies. Perhaps it implies that Sans is adaptable due to Licca-chan’s nature as a doll and how she is in a constant state of change to reflect the times. It also seems to be a pun on “liquor” because Sans was talking about beer in the English version. I tried to scour the Japanese fandom for clues, but they also seemed stumped. If anyone has any ideas on what this could mean, please let me know!

Regardless, “Sans” doesn’t seem to be his actual name. Perhaps his true name was Gaster...?

Additionally, If the player changes the name of the fallen child via going into the code, this message appears in the stats menu. The vernacular is very Sans-like, with his frequent use of question tags at the end of his sentences (I counted 14 huh’s from Sans).

Finally, let’s talk about the number six. We know that it’s Gaster’s number--All of the explicitly Gaster-related fun events trigger for fun values in the sixties, Gaster’s stats are all comprised of 6′s, Gaster’s “typer-value” is 666--you get the idea.

The concept art Toby drew for the Alarm Clock’s character screen features what is presumably Sans and the number six.

“The Choice”--the track that plays during Sans’s judgements--is “Undertale” slowed down by 666%.

Section IV - Angels and Demons (The “Why”)

In modern day culture, 666 is closely associated with the devil. The Book of Revelation (13:17-18) asserts that 666 is “the number of a man” (this is important, and we’ll come back to it later) and is “the number of the Beast”. The Beast is mentioned as “coming out of the abyss”.

Sounds a lot like someone else we know, doesn’t it? And how fitting for Sans, the one who judges our sins and demands us “to burn in hell”.

But if we go further, the Beast of Revelation is described to have seven heads representing seven kings. The beast itself is an eighth king who is of the seven and "was and is not and shall ascend out of the bottomless pit, and go into perdition."

Chara is an eighth of the seven fallen children.

There’s something Chara, Sans, and Gaster all share, and it’s their association with demons.

Here is an excerpt from the Cutting Room Floor:

Among the four strings in version 1.0, the last one, designated by variable “demond”, stands out for two reasons.

The letter “d” is separate from the other letters denoting the demon variables--the rest, “x”, “y”, and “z” are in sequential alphabet order.

The speech pattern of the last string is different from the others. It has that signature question tag at the end of the sentence that a certain character is known for.

In version 1.001, the strings clearly reflect Chara’s speech pattern. This time, all the variables are in sequential order from “a” to “d”.

Pieces of dialogue at the near-end of a genocide route from Chara and Sans. Recall that Chara is using the same “Now” from earlier with Gaster and Sans.

Chara makes a reference to Banana Yoshimoto's book “Kitchen”. Take note of the page number.

Chara is also linked to the number nine. It’s the highest achievable stat in-game. It’s the stat of the locket and real knife. It’s how much damage Chara deals. It’s also the number six flipped upside down.

The connections are undeniable.

And yet, it goes further. Let’s take a look at how Christmas comes in to play.

In Deltarune, there are a few references to it, the most foremost probably being the importance of Noelle Holiday as a character. We also get Lancer’s laugh and the joke with “Krismas”.

Back to Undertale, there is significant Christmas iconography represented by “Gyfmas” and Gyftrot (bearing a strong resemblance to Photoshop Flowey, the DT Extractor, and Gaster Blasters).

What I’d like to focus on is Santa. Papyrus describes him as “a chubby, smiling man who loves to surprise people.” From the thank you note addressed to Santa we find in Sans’s room, we can assume that Sans is a Santa, at least to Papyrus. It’s pretty fitting, since Sans can be described as someone who “knows if [we’ve] been bad or good”. Maybe he can even tell if we’re sleeping or awake with how the Dark World appears to be linked with sleep and dreams (please read my theory on Sans being a Darkner for more on this).

So we can reasonably conclude that Sans presents himself as a friendly, child-oriented figure, in-line with the nature of Comic Sans, a font for children, and Ice-E, a mascot of a company marketed towards children.

…

Santa is an anagram of Satan.

…

To recap: Gaster’s association with the number 666 marks him as a “demon”. Chara and Sans are also called demons and similarly have connections to the number 6. This is more evidence that Gaster and Sans is or used to be the same people, and Chara has some form of correspondence with them.

I failed to mention before that there is actually a second Beast of Revelation “from the Earth” with "two horns like a lamb”. From the “earth” like Flowey, with horns like Asriel.

Asriel is most likely the “Angel” depicted in the prophecy within the scope of Undertale; he’s named similarly to Azrael, an angel of death, and one of his attacks is literally called “Angel of Death”. He also bears a striking resemblance to the Deltarune in his God of Hyperdeath form.

Surprise, surprise, he and Sans also share parallels.

Let’s start with their introductions. “Flowey the flower”. “Sans the skeleton”. It’s a similarly alliterative greeting and they’re both using fake names.

Mirrored dialogue yet again...

…and similar meta-commentary.

These three characters--Sans/Gaster, Chara, and Flowey/Asriel--they have all fallen. Gaster fell into his creation. Chara fell into the Underground. Asriel had “fallen down”. (Sans and Papyrus are also the only sibling pair other than Chara and Asriel. I won’t talk about Papyrus in this part though because this thing is shaping up to be too long already.)

What does this mean for Sans? I have a personal theory.

Above the entryway of the Judgement Hall, there is a reversed Deltarune. The triangles are inverted and the wings are more bat-like. In the room where only Sans appears, the same room that plays a version of “Undertale” slowed down 666%.

I think Sans is a candidate for the Angel prophesized to destroy the world in Deltarune. I think he is Sans Serif, a seraph. He fell into his experiment and became a “fallen” angel, a demon.

The Angel’s Heaven mentioned alongside, on the other hand... Heaven can also be used to refer to God. Dog is an anagram of God.

Sans has many, many connections with dogs, especially one Annoying Dog. More on this next time.

Part 1 || ❤️ || Part 3

#undertale #deltarune #undertale theory #deltarune theory #sans #gaster #cellytheory

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jemmahazelnut · 3 years

Text

Confused feelings

Summary: Finral finds out that Yami is gay, from that day he can do nothing but think about it and becomes more and more confused about his feelings. [Yami/Finral]

Link: AO3

Notes: This is a short fanfic, linked to this one with an explicit rating (smut) Unexpected. Hope you like it!

Confused feelings

Revelation

Finral couldn’t believe he was stuck there. He didn’t even know why Yami had asked -of all- him to help him cook. He understood that Charmy was away and couldn’t help him, but there were other people much better at cooking than him, there were Asta, Vanessa and Magna. But Yami had been adamant and he was having a lot of fun, and the more nervous Finral got, the more Yami laughed. Finral growled through his teeth as he tried to clean the fish from the spines, a job he thought was impossible.

“Why me?” Finral snorted, giving up cleaning it and threw the fish into the pan. It was something wrong, because the oil began to splash and Finral jumped and took a step back, crashing into the chest of Yami, who still laughed.

“Afraid of a little oil?” the man made fun of him. Finral clenched his fists.

“I’m not afraid, I’m just pissed” he moaned and turned his head to Yami, who still attached to him was watching the fish cooking in the pan.

“I’ve never seen anyone cook this badly,” Yami commented and Finral got even more nervous.

“Another reason to ask someone else” he blurted out annoyed crossing his arms.

“Rather it’s one more reason to teach you how to cook. You have to learn by tomorrow,” Yami said pushing him towards the stove. Finral let him do it, also because fighting the man was difficult. Yami jammed him against the hob -probably to keep him from escaping- and Finral sighed in resignation, knowing full well that he wouldn’t free himself from there. He ignored the slight tingling on his back in contact with Yami’s chest, and watched the man take the ladle and move the fish so that he didn’t stick to the pan.

“Why do I have to learn by tomorrow?” Finral asked.

“There’s the Clover party and the challenge between me and the stretched out bug,” Yami reminded him. Finral was silent for a moment, trying not to pay too much attention to the fact that they were closer than two men should have been. Instead, he began to feel anxious about the challenge.

“And I should help you?” he blurted out in disbelief.

“Of course,” Yami said. Finral turned to him.

“Absolutely not. This is my chance to date some girl, I will not help you with your stupid challenge. And then I would make you lose, ask someone more capable,” he said. There was no way he would waste the whole evening doing something like this.

Yami rolled his eyes and snorted, moving away from him and giving him a dirty look.

“You can’t get a second date anyway,” he commented. Finral blushed slightly and got nervous.

“This isn’t true,” he said sharply. “And for tomorrow night I’ve prepared a repertoire of lines to use to go out with any girl” he said convinced, that time he had been helped by Vanessa, he was sure that with those phrases he would be able to go out with anyone. Yami grinned in amusement.

“I’m surprised a pretty face like you has to prepare in advance in order to get a second date,” he chuckled and Finral glared at him. In any case, he didn’t want to help Yami in his stupid challenge. “I’m really sorry you won’t be able to use it, but I have to win the challenge, and you will help me,” Yami ordered.

Finral snorted, doubting Yami was sorry. Finral had a lot of other complaints to make but at that moment Noelle approached them for help from Yami. According to what she was saying, Magna and Luck had destroyed a house nearby and still hadn’t stopped the fight. Yami sighed in annoyance and handed the ladle to Finral.

“Make it burn and I’ll kill you,” he threatened him, then follows Noelle annoyed.

Finral found himself with a ladle in his hand and a fish in the pan, the nervousness still there and the frustration of knowing that the next day he couldn’t go out with any girl. He wanted to scream but instead tried to mimic what he had seen Yami do to keep the fish from attacking.

Vanessa, who was sitting nearby just to drink some wine, giggled.

“You know, you and Yami are very funny, you almost look like an old married couple,” she said. Finral gave her a dirty look.

“It seems to me more like I’m his housewife,” he growled. A very bad housewife, and luckily Asta’s presence freed him from many chores. Vanessa laughed slightly.

“That wasn’t what I meant,” she said and leaned towards him. “After all, you and Yami are very close. In spite of everything you like him, don’t you?” she asked. Finral snorted.

“Well of course, he’s fun. He would be more if he didn’t put me in the midst of his challenges,” he said. Vanessa shook her head. Still, that wasn’t what she meant. “And then why did he ask me? He knows I don’t know how to cook,” Finral continued to complain.

“Who knows why,” Vanessa said wryly, as if she knew it. Finral didn’t notice, too busy keeping the fish from sticking to the pan, but apparently, he was quite prevented because when he turned it the skin was black. It was burned. Finral let out a deep frustrated moan.

“I hate cooking!”

***

Finral hadn’t been able to convince Yami, so that evening he found himself grudgingly joining him and Jack. However, that challenge hadn’t turned out to be so terrible. Since Finral was unable to cook he just sold what Yami prepared, and he had the excuse to flirt with the girls passing by, attracting their attention with the steaming food in his hands. Apparently, a guy who could cook attracted girls, so he had already obtained a date. He couldn’t wait to see her again.

“Less flirting, more customers,” Yami told him obviously irritated. Probably because the race wasn’t going the way he wanted it, Finral thought.

“My flirts make you have a lot more customers,” he objected and Yami grunted. Finral, however, was right, with Vanessa’s help he had managed to attract attention more than he normally did, even if every now and then Yami ruined everything by calling him ‘ride’ in front of them or talking about questionable things. After all, Finral couldn’t expect too much, but he was already happy to have gotten a date.

“We haven’t won yet,” Yami said, glaring at the captain of the Green Mantis, who was selling his plates to a group of girls. “Bastard,” Yami murmured.

Finral sighed in annoyance.

“Why do you waste time doing these challenges? Wouldn’t it be nicer to go out with some women?” he asked a bit curious. Yami had never shown interest in anyone, Finral was beginning to wonder what his type was. Perhaps no one, Finral wouldn’t have been surprised, Yami didn’t like people in general.

“I’m not interested in women,” Yami grunted. Finral rolled his eyes, he must have expected it.

“Of course not, the only things that interest you are doing these stupid challenges, fighting and shitting” he commented ironically. “A little surprised you don’t like to fuck,” he then muttered. He didn’t know why but he imagined -with a certain annoyance- Yami a guy who enjoyed sex without obligation. Yami laughed.

“I actually like to fuck, but with the right man” he admitted casually as he turned the fish.

Finral dropped the sandwich from his hands completely off guard, wondering if he had heard right.

Yami gave him an annoyed look. “Don’t waste food,” he growled.

Finral was still looking at him with wide eyes loss for words. At that moment he couldn’t think of the challenge but only what Yami had just admitted. Or was he making fun of him? No one admitted being gay that way, not in Clover, not out in the street where anyone could hear. Who was gay was ashamed, went out at night in certain secret places to vent his perversions, or did things at his house. He certainly wasn’t going to say in the center of Clover’s capital that he was. But that was Yami, it could be that he really was, he never gave a shit about what people said or thought.

“Are you... serious?” he asked still surprised. Yami looked at him definitely annoyed, Finral was pretty sure he wasn’t for the food he had dropped to the ground.

“Any problem?” he asked making him feel all the annoyance. Finral quickly shook his head and reached down to pick up the food to throw it away.

“No, no problem,” he murmured and then went back to work, exchanging as few words as possible with Yami. The rest of the evening was terrible.

***

Finral was cleaning the stall when Yami approached. They had talked very little, Finral had limited himself to attracting as many customers as possible while he continued to rethink what he had discovered. Honestly, he was a bit upset, he wouldn’t have expected Yami to be gay, nor that he had kept it from them until then. But he couldn’t blame him, if he was, Finral was sure he would keep it to himself, he probably wouldn’t even tell Vanessa.

But Yami wasn’t him, Yami didn’t give a shit what other people thought, so why not tell him? And why had Finral reacted so badly to know? It wasn’t that that changed anything in Finral. Yami could go out with whoever he wanted and Finral knew there was nothing wrong with that, even though he had heard rumors -especially when he lived with his parents- saying otherwise. Finral could reason with his head. He had always hated those rumors, finding them mostly mean and senseless.

“So, are you upset?” Yami asked. Finral looked up confused, still lost in his thoughts. “Do you think less than me because I fuck with men? Are you convinced that this makes me less of a wizard or any other bullshit people say?”

Finral hastened to shake his head, not wanting to be misunderstood. He had reacted badly, but not for that reason.

“No, not at all,” he said right away. “I was just surprised. I didn’t expect it, that’s all” he said shrugging and trying to convey all his sincerity. Fortunately, Yami could read ki, he couldn’t misunderstand it. In fact, his shoulders relaxed and he took a cigarette, lit it while Finral became thoughtful. Finral really didn’t care what other people or Yami did, despite this he felt some discomfort but didn’t know what it was due to.

“I’m surprised you said it here. Anyone could hear…” he finally added, perhaps more to fill the void.

“So what?” Yami asked.

“And so… you know, people… it doesn’t matter,” Finral said, not wanting to put him in a bad mood. Yami looked at him and Finral felt even more uncomfortable and avoided his gaze. Honestly, he was ashamed, he didn’t even know why.

“I never gave a damn about what people say” Yami snorted a bit of smoke and Finral looked back at him.

“You don’t give a damn but you never told me,” he said.

“I just don’t talk about my private life,” Yami said. “That doesn’t mean I’m ashamed of it,” he added. Finral nodded, right, Yami regardless didn’t talk much about himself. Finral decided to lighten the atmosphere, he didn’t know why but he felt the need to do it, before getting lost talking about more annoying things.

“So, are you dating Captain Jack?” he asked with a small smile.

Yami’s expression was priceless, and Finral almost burst out laughing but he bit his cheek not to.

“I’m gay, not desperate,” Yami clarified more shocked than annoyed, and then smiled in amusement, shaking his head, as if he found it funny. “And then I prefer guys with a pretty face, not the ass-face of that stick insect”.

Finral found himself giggling, while Yami put a hand on his shoulder and told him to take them home and stop being an idiot.

Introspection

Finral couldn’t help but think about Yami and what he had told him a few nights earlier. He wondered if he was the only one of the Black Bull to know. He believed to be the closest to Yami, but since he came from the nobility, maybe Yami would have preferred to talk to someone else about it.

Maybe Gauche knew, but Finral doubted that Gauche was interested in Yami’s sex life. In fact, he probably would have just been happy with it and would have preferred every man to be gay so that there was no risk for Marie. In any case, Finral didn’t really imagine those two talking about serious things.

There were Magna and Luck, but they were quite naive and little interested in sex in general, their only thought was to fight. Thinking of them, for the first time Finral found himself noticing how close the two were, how they continually searched for each other, with one excuse or another. How often they slept together, and for the first time Finral wondered if those two were in a relationship and kept it hidden from others. He shook his head with a smile, they probably didn’t even realize they were that close. In any case, surely Yami hadn’t talked to them.

Gordon and Grey were out of the question, as were Asta and Noelle, they were either too shy or too young. Henry remained, which was likely since he was always in the house. And Vanessa. Vanessa surely knew, she had this habit of always knowing everything about the lives of others, whether they told her about it or not.

Finral glanced at Yami, at that moment the man was sitting comfortably on the sofa and was reading the newspaper, Magna and Luck were out fighting -always together, Finral noticed again- while Asta was training with Noelle.

Finral found himself wondering how his parents would react to knowing that the Black Bull commander was gay. They probably would have gone mad, they would have complained even more about the company he had joined, and Finral found himself annoyed. Anyway, why did he care about? His parents had no right to say anything about his friends. Despite this, the memories of his life as a noble began to reach him.

He remembered how they had once talked about a magical knight and how his reputation fell when people found out he had a boyfriend. He was part of the Purple Orca and Finral still remembered the comments of his parents. He clenched his fists not even knowing why he was so angry. Yami gave him a puzzled look, maybe sensing something in his ki, but then ignored it and went back to the newspaper.

Finral frowned as he remembered another episode from his childhood. He was still a child when it happened, Finral had seen a cute child, picked flowers and gave them to him. Liliane had seen him and slapped him immediately after, spitting words that had made him terribly ashamed. She had told him not to do it again, or he would dishonor House Vaude.

Finral also remembered how he had done it again a few days later with another child, openly telling him that he was cute. This time it was his father who heard him and slapped him in the face. Since that time Finral hadn’t done it again, and he had also avoided looking at the other boys, focusing on the girls.

Finral frowned for a moment confused about what he had done as a child. Why had he given those children flowers? He wasn’t gay, he was sure of that. He felt some discomfort as confused thoughts filled his head. Well, after all he was just a child and he just wanted to do something nice for another person, that certainly didn’t make him gay. He had always been interested in girls, girls were beautiful, they always had been. Men instead... well sure, Finral recognized a handsome man, but still, that didn’t mean anything.

He shook his head in confusion, all that thinking was making him nervous. He got up and opened a kitchen cupboard in search of food, found a leftover cake and cut himself a slice and began to eat. His eyes fell on Yami, who was still reading silently. Finral looked at him curiously, wondering how he lived it. Was he really uninterested in what other people were saying or was it all façade? After all, it wasn’t easy to know what people thought of him.

“Your ki is making me nervous,” Yami said suddenly and Finral jumped taken aback. Despite this he walked over to him, sitting on the sofa while Yami put down the newspaper. “You want to ask me something, right?”.

Finral nodded. “Well, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to...” he began cautiously not knowing how to behave.

“Just talk,” Yami said in annoyance.

“Your hometown is like Clover? Are there any prejudices about gays?” he asked at that point hoping the question wasn’t somehow offensive. Yami didn’t seem offended at all, instead he became thoughtful and his gaze filled with a melancholy light.

“No, it was very different,” he replied. Finral looked at him curiously and Yami continued talking. “Marriages between two men or two women were also allowed, nobody gave a shit about who you dated. In this Clover sucks”.

Finral looked at him sorry. Living in another land must already have been difficult, but living in a land that didn’t even accept you was worse. He stared at the wall in front of him with some bitterness.

“I guess it’s hard to live here, you’d probably rather go home and live with people who understand you,” he murmured. Yami snorted as if he didn’t give a damn.

“Don’t be melodramatic. I am exactly where I want to be,” he said, stretching out on the sofa taking up most of the space, and placing his legs on top of Finral’s. “Instead, bring me some cake, slacker”.

Finral rolled his eyes but opened a portal to put his arm through and do as Yami said. He passed the cake to Yami and for a few seconds watched him as he ate and started reading the newspaper again. Despite the weight on his legs, Finral found himself appreciating that closeness.

***

It wasn’t the first time Finral had watched Yami train, and it wasn’t even the first time Finral had watched his muscles tense as he swung his sword. It was only the first time he realized he was staring too much at a man, and the first time he wondered if it was normal. He thought so, Finral had always admired Yami. As a captain, as a magical knight and as a wizard. Certainly not as a man, although he had to admit it wasn’t bad to watch Yami work out.

Finral blushed. What the hell was he thinking about? The fact that Yami was gay didn’t mean that Finral could observe him as he did with women, not least because Finral wasn’t gay. He looked up and his eyes were drawn back to Yami’s body, which was cutting down trees in the woods. His bicep was flexed, his muscles glistening with sweat, his hair slightly wet and God, he was handsome. He was hot.

Finral felt a certain warmth in his stomach and shook his head to dismiss the thought. That was the typical thought a person attracted to men had. He wasn’t. He was just confused by Yami’s revelation, that’s all, he was just thinking about it too much.

He resumed reading his book but in doing so he realized something. He had a couple of magazines at home about the most handsome men in the kingdom. He had only taken them to understand what women liked, but if someone had seen them, he would have thought that... But why did he care? No one would ever see them, and besides, it was clear that he was interested in women. They were beautiful, like Charlotte.

Yes, she was practically a Goddess. Of course, Yami was a handsome man too, Finral could recognize it, just as he could recognize that Fuegoleon was a handsome man too, but it was pure and simple admiration for the man he wanted to be. A strong and courageous man, like Yami, Fuegoleon, William or even Nozel. Of course, Finral preferred the less rigid men, the more rustic ones. Nozel was aesthetically handsome but he certainly didn’t have the charm of Yami, a much more practical man, physically stronger and with that irresistibly attractive air.

Finral froze suddenly realizing where his thoughts were going. Suddenly all his certainties collapsed.

***

“I think I like men,” Finral said as he walked into Vanessa’s room. The girl looked up from the book she was reading and looked at him in surprise.

“Hello to you too,” she said wryly. Finral paid no attention, too busy thinking about his problems and the confusion that reigned in his head. He had thought about it for days, had even dreamed of kissing Yami -Yami, for heaven’s sake- and had had a nightmare in which his parents exiled him from home for his sexuality. As if that could happen, he had already been kicked out of the house.

“I’m serious. I’m gay?” he asked confused. Vanessa raised an eyebrow.

“I doubt it,” she said.

“I’m serious, really. I know it sounds absurd but I like men, I look at men, why else would I have these magazines?” he blurted out hysterically, throwing them at Vanessa, who looked at them curiously. “Why else would I watch them on the street? This means that I’m gay, that I don’t like women, that I have repressed who I am until now just because of my parents’ stupid chatter,” he snapped. What if someone found out? If anyone knew? What if Langris knew? Finral was starting to feel bad.

Vanessa got out of bed and put her hands on his shoulders.

“Calm down,” she said with a calm but strong voice “Look me in the eyes and breathe” she ordered.

Finral complied, realizing that he was hyperventilating. Vanessa led him to sit on the bed, running her hand on his back and waiting for him to calm down, while Finral tried to rearrange his thoughts and calm his breathing. Somehow he succeeded, maybe it was Vanessa’s presence that helped him.

“Better?” Vanessa asked noticing that he had calmed down. Finral nodded slightly. “How do you feel?”

“Confused” Finral admitted. “And a little scared,” he added immediately afterwards. Vanessa nodded calmly.

“Ok. So… you like men, I don’t think that makes you gay, you still like women, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Finral said a little uncertainly. But yes, he really liked them. He hadn’t forced himself to be attracted from them to repress his feelings, he was sure of that.

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with that, you know? Look, I know you grew up in an environment where all people do is talk bad about gay people, but it’s all stupid, you know that too,” Vanessa said.

Finral nodded, sure he knew. He had always thought that, stupid and bad things. He had thought that even when Yami admitted he was gay. But accepting Yami was one thing, accepting himself was another. Especially when he was confused about who he liked. He had to admit though that Vanessa was really helping.

“I know it. I mean, theoretically I know. It’s just… for a lifetime I’ve been convinced I’m straight and now… I like men,” he said. It was somewhat liberating to say the last sentence and to know that he wouldn’t being judged by Vanessa.

“Maybe you didn’t think about it because you were too busy chasing women,” Vanessa said with a small, amused smile. Finral ran a hand through his hair unable to reply, that made a lot of sense. “And well, your parents certainly had some impact,” the girl added. Finral sighed dejected.

“If they found out... it would be just one more disappointment,” Finral murmured. As if he wasn’t bad enough, he thought he couldn’t get any worse, apparently it wasn’t true. He could always get worse, there was no limit to that.

“Don’t even think of it,” Vanessa snapped. “You’re much better than them,” she growled. Finral smiled at her reassuringly, he didn’t want to worry her unnecessarily, it was just his usual paranoia.

“Don’t worry, I just… I don’t want people to know. Neither do the others,” he said referring to the Black Bulls. Vanessa nodded.

“Okay, there’s nothing wrong with that. But you know it wouldn’t interest anyone and it wouldn’t change anything,” Vanessa said at that point. Finral nodded, of course he knew, or at least he guessed it. Still, he wasn’t ready to say it, not until he was so confused.

“Well, I feel better. Thanks,” Finral said. “I just had to talk to someone about it “.

“You know you can always come to me” smiled the girl “At least now we can talk about guys together” she said amused. Finral rolled his eyes but a smile escaped him, he certainly couldn’t deny and actually it would have been quite funny. “And speaking of this, between you and Yami, you know, is there something?” she asked with a certain malice.

Finral looked at her for a moment in silence, blinking several times while everything he had thought about man in all those months and especially in those last days came back to him. He blushed violently and his eyes widened. Yami wasn’t just one of the many men he had looked at, Yami was the man Finral had approached, the man who made him smile like maddening, the man he most admired of all.

“Oh fuck,” he murmured.

“Oh, now you see it. Well, two steps are done, you just need the last step now” laughed Vanessa. Finral barely listened to her, suddenly had changed his mind about talking about guys with her. He opened a portal and fled. He had just solved a problem, why did he have to create another one?

Discussion

Finral had obtained a second date with the girl he had met at Clover’s party. He should have been happy, the girl was beautiful, nice, kind and interested in him. The problem was that she wasn’t Yami, and now all Finral’s thoughts revolved around that man. The man Finral was undeniably in love with.

He could no longer deny it, Vanessa had understood it, he had accepted it. Of course, of all the men he had to fall in love with Yami, his rough and annoying captain, a man among others that Finral knew was gay. Despite this, and despite what Vanessa said -she told him to try flirting with him- Finral refused to do so. He not only would have risked ruining a good friendship, but he would also have sent the team into crisis. Also, he wasn’t sure Yami reciprocated just because he liked men.

That’s why Finral was doing everything to not think about it and went out with that girl. It was working out quite well, the night was the right one, the girl was beautiful, the chatter went out easily. The only downside was that Finral would have to return to base soon because of Yami. The man had told him annoyed that he needed his ride and not to be late, and Finral’s complaints had been useless. He had tried to explain that he had a date -a second date- but that seemed to have unnerved Yami even more, for some reason. He had explicitly told him that he didn’t give a shit about his date: or he’d move to get back in time, or kill him.

That’s why at the appointed time Finral opened a portal and returned home, with some disappointment because the date had been ruined by that small detail.

When he entered the living room he saw that Yami wasn’t there, so he went up the stairs and reached his room, knocking before entering.

“What do you want?” Yami asked annoyed, he was lying on the bed and was reading a book with a cigarette between his lips. Finral tried not to focus on the man wearing only a pair of pants. Until a few days ago Finral had hardly noticed it, why now did he have to feel so hot just at the idea that Yami was half naked? He thought about the girl he had gone out with and the nice date he had had, luckily that was enough to distract him.

“Didn’t I have to take you somewhere?” Finral asked slightly annoyed.

“Really? I forgot about it,” Yami said quietly as he went back to reading. Finral felt his nerves throb in his temples. What did it mean that he had forgotten?

“You’re joking. I have given up on my date and you don’t have to go anywhere?” Finral blurted out annoyed. Yami shrugged. “Damn, I could have been with her more!” Finral exclaimed in frustration. Yami turned to him.

“Why? Was the date going well?” he asked derisively and with some annoyance that Finral noticed. Not that Yami had anything to be bothered about, it was Finral who had every right to be. His date had been ruined for nothing!

“Yes, until I told her I had to go back to you. You ruined it for me,” Finral snapped. Yami grinned as if he were satisfied.

“I’m so sorry,” he said and went back to reading. He wasn’t sorry at all and they both knew it. Finral growled softly.

“You always spoil my dates, I knew I had to stay there” Finral muttered “Now where can I find another girl like her?”

“Not my problems,” Yami snapped. Finral glared at him, honestly annoyed. It almost felt like Yami was doing it on purpose, like the night he had forced him to help him with his stupid challenge with Jack. First he had stopped him from flirting with girls, then he had ruined all his approaches. If it had been someone else Finral would have thought he was jealous.

The thought didn’t escape as quickly as he had intended and his face darkened. He didn’t want to delude himself and get hurt, for sure Yami wasn’t jealous. Not him. Yami didn’t like men like him. Yami liked...

“And then I prefer guys with a pretty face, not the ass-face of that stick insect”

“I’m surprised a pretty face like you has to prepare in advance in order to get a second date”

“You know, you and Yami are very funny, you almost look like an old married couple”

“Don’t be melodramatic. I am exactly where I want to be”

“Oh, now you see it. Well, two steps are done, you just need the last step now”

Yami had been irritated when he found out that Finral had gotten a second date, it had ruined all the previous ones, he had smiled satisfied when he knew they had gone wrong. Either he was jealous or he just wanted to piss him off. Finral leaned more towards that last hypothesis, Yami couldn’t be jealous of him.

But what if he was? If he really had a chance to like him?

Yami slowly turned to him and frowned. “Your ki is going crazy, pretty-boy”.

Finral looked at him shocked, that last nickname was too much. He opened a portal and fled.

***

Finral had slept in an inn. He hadn’t come home the day before or the day previous one, too terrified of having to confront Yami and having to deal with his crush that was no longer a simple crush. By now he was completely in love, he couldn’t deny it, he was looking for any excuse to believe that Yami was a little interested in him and that was driving him crazy.

Sure, Yami said he had a pretty face, called him pretty-boy, and explicitly said he liked men with a pretty face. That meant he was a little attracted to him, right? What if he was? Finral should have been happy with that, he knew it, but he wasn’t at all. He was just getting anxious.

What would it be like to be in a relationship with Yami? Terrible, for sure. And Finral didn’t want to be in a relationship with a man, that would definitely make him gay, or bisexual, or whatever the hell he was. Why then was he thinking about it? It was probably all in his head, there was no way that Yami was interested in him, no matter what he said.

Someone knocked on the door and Finral turned confused. Then, without waiting for an answer, the intruder entered and Finral almost choked on his own saliva when he saw Yami. Great, he came at the worst time.

“Are you ok?” Yami asked closing the door behind him. Finral avoided his gaze not knowing what to think. He didn’t even know how Yami had managed to find him.

“Um… yeah,” he said. He wasn’t at all.

“You haven’t been to the base in the last three days,” Yami noted.

“I’m sorry,” Finral said continuing to avoid his gaze. He felt terribly stiff, and he didn’t know how to behave naturally. His thoughts and his emotions were driving him crazy and he was afraid that Yami would understand and not reciprocate. Damn, he was a disaster, before he thought about how bad a relationship with his captain would be, and now he hoped to be reciprocated and not having imagined everything. What the hell was wrong with him?

“Well, I guess you have understood that,” Yami said in a calm, almost bitter tone. Finral looked up, daring to look him in the eye and found himself a little surprised to see that the man looked a little sad. It was usually difficult to see such a clear emotion on his face. “I like you, Finral, but the last thing I want is to make you uncomfortable, we can leave things as they are. If you don’t reciprocate, that’s fine”.

Finral’s eyes widened slightly, incredulous and his heart skipping a few beats at the revelation.

He had said it. Yami had said it. Yami liked him.

“Look, I’m sorry I ruined your dates. I won’t do it again,” Yami said running his hand through his hair. He was surprisingly serious and calm, incredibly sincere. He wasn’t embarrassed or uncomfortable, he knew what he wanted, he was just... bitter, Finral noted with some dismay. He couldn’t believe it, Yami really had a crush on him. His captain had a crush on him. Yami reciprocated his feelings.

Yami sighed slightly. “You don’t have to feel compelled to do anything, it’s my thing, and I already knew that...”

“That’s not it,” Finral interrupted him before he misunderstood, the last thing he wanted was for Yami to think he wasn’t reciprocated. The blush rose up his cheeks but Finral struggled to get the words out. “I actually like you too,” he admitted in a low voice. Yami’s eyes widened slightly.

“Are you just saying this because you don’t want me to feel bad or are you sincere?” Yami asked.

“I’m sincere,” Finral said, watching him. He thanked again that Yami could read his ki, maybe he understood better than him what he was feeling. Yami frowned and walked over to sit on the bed next to Finral.

“Then why did you run away?” he asked.

Finral hesitated for a moment.

“I... I don’t know if I can have a relationship with a man,” he admitted embarrassed. “I mean, I know I like men too, and I really… I like you but, I don’t know,” he snorted in frustration. He felt terribly scared and didn’t even know what for. There was no reason to be, it was just his worries that ruined everything as always.

Yami was silent for a few seconds.

“Is it the bullshit people say around?”.

“Also, but not only,” Finral admitted. “Just, it’s all new to me. I don’t know how a relationship with a man works and if my parents find out, if the rumor reaches Langris, or the other captains, or the Magical Emperor, or...”

Yami put his hand on Finral’s shoulder interrupting his thoughts.

“We don’t have to tell anyone, you know? We don’t even have to tell the other brats if you don’t want to, I don’t give a damn. And as for the bullshit people talk about, the sooner you get them out of your system, the better,” he said in a calm but strong tone. Finral looked up and met his eyes, it was much more comforting than he had thought. Yami was right, and even though Finral wasn’t sure how to move yet, he didn’t want to miss such an opportunity just for fear. He smiled slightly.

“I was an idiot, huh?” he asked trying to lighten the situation, still not quite knowing how to move.

“Sure,” Yami said and smiled slightly amused “So, you still think you can’t have a relationship with a man?” he asked provocatively. Finral blushed. He didn’t understand how Yami could admit being attracted to him so easily.

“No, I don’t think so anymore,” he said in a whisper, staring at him almost in adoration. He would have felt uncomfortable under his intense gaze, but Yami’s smile paid off.

The captain put a hand behind Finral’s neck, bowed his head and kissed him. Finral gasped for a moment, even though he wasn’t taken by surprise. But the hardness of Yami’s lips, the faint smell of cigarette that strangely didn’t bother him, the fingers that went up through his hair melted him in an instant.

Finral kiss him back, tilting his head to the side and moving his lips slowly. He never thought a kiss could be so exciting, but it was. Yami was energetic and thrilled him in a way no woman ever did.

When they separated, Finral was out of breath and his heart was beating madly. He opened his eyes only to see Yami’s sweet gaze, which made him melt even more. He inevitably found himself smiling.

“So... do we have a date?” Finral asked.

“Yeah, but don’t expect romantic bullshit. And absolutely don’t give me flowers,” Yami said knowing Finral’s habit of wooing women. The space wizard found himself giggling, and thought it would be funny to see Yami’s reaction to his flirt. Maybe later though. At the moment he didn’t want to leave that room.

“Ok,” he agreed. Yami smiled lightly and leaned down again, bringing their lips together in another fantastic kiss. Finral closed his eyes, feeling in the right place with the right person. He still wasn’t sure who he was attracted to, but he sure was attracted to Yami, and that was enough.

#black clover #finral roulacase #yami sukehiro #yamifin #fanfiction

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