#not pictured is all the pride flags and anime figures

[houseofbelmont]

some off favourite parts in my room, I’m going for gothic castlevania vampire-hunter vibes

[alexissara]

Top 11 Ships of 2023

Time for a typical and normal numbered top 11 list, the classic and well known format, top 11, which everyone uses and everyone loves garnering much SEO so that I may boost myself. This standard top 11 of the year list which everyone does annually really is covering ships I really loved this year. I love love and therefore love when romance is in things I watch and I love imaging relationships between characters. While I am not a super active fanfic writer or reader I enjoy fan art and thinking about dynamics and sometimes writing or reading. This year had a ton of girls I thought should kiss so without further ado let's get into it.

Sulleta and Chuchu [Gundam: The Witch From Mecury]

Opening with a Rare Pair but I am here to wave my Sulleta and Chuchu flag. While all my ships are polyam and open to them dating lots of other women if I had to pick a pair for either women it be them together. Unlike their other relationships this is a true ride of die pair. Chuchu and Sulletta always have each others backs even when their hurt by people they love and trust. Their both mech pilots and can fight together. Their adorable and sweet and I can see them blowing up their enemies together and wish we had more of it in the show.

Whisper and Tangle [Sonic IDW]

Pictured above is not an edit but an actual panel from Sonic IDW. While the creators have fairly clearly said that Sega simply will not allow them to make any romance canon straight or gay including for original characters these two are clearly being written as a couple and everyone has simply agreed that they are gay and hoping that fan pressure will eventually force Segas hands. These hero besties are opposites attracts goodness one is silent and keeps her feelings inside the other is out there and emotional but both kick ass together and support each other. These furries are probably as close to canon romance sonic is gonna get for the foreseeable future and their just so cute I'll never get over them.

Edelgard Polycule

While not a new ship or a ship with new offical content at all in 2023 outside of Edelgard talking about some of her girlfriends in Emblem ring conversations in Engage but I made new content, a lot of it for this ship in 2023 so it be lying to say it wasn't a top ship, probably the top ship given I ya know made fan content for it. Edelgard deserves all the girlfriends in the world and I am utterly giddy when I think about Edelgard and her big group of GFs. I feel similarly about many FE women but none as strongly as Lady Edelgard [Monica moment]. Edelgard does so much to make a better future for everyone and I think at the end of it, she should be loved every second of the rest of her life. I'm even doing like a private Three Houses roleplay thing for our combined ideal route for the game and crafting our own definitive version of the story.

HarlIvy [Harley Quinn Animated, DC]

Harlivy forever! Harlivy is for sure one of my oldest ships but it's also a ship that had a fucking load of amazing new stuff this year. While I have not read the comics proper we had a main line Harley Quinn comic where they said that a multiversal truth about Harley is that she has an Ivy and a fucked up evil Harley was redeemed by finding her fucked up evil Ivy with the help of main Harley. We had the utterly adorable DC Pride comic featuring them basically adopting Crash another lesbian character. Then we had a new season of Harley Quinn animated that while it started rough I think had a good purpose in establishing what the creators believe is the heart of Harley and Ivy and it's something I agree with so ya know awesome. Harley and Ivy complete each other and while I see them as being polyam I think their the core part of their relationship, nesting bitches for life. Their a couple I'd love to write some fics for and in general just a dynamic I really truly love a lot. Harley and Ivy are complicated and messy gals and seeing them figure their shit out together is great.

Jala/Tyler/Diya [Thirsty Suitors]

I want this messy trio of exes to be a sexy little triad. Jala and Tyler have a very messy history but to me I think the answer is clear on why Jala is like this, which is that she will never be happy with just one partner, she's not meant for monogamy and I think when her and Tyler have healed more and Jala realizes this about herself, they can have a talk and like both actually have a healthy polyam relationship rather than a toxic monogamous relationship. That's where Diya comes in she was an asshole and a bully but she's grown and she is a proud out lesbian now and helps take care of the community something Tyler cares about and she's still into Jala and i think them growing into a cute little throuple would be so good and I wanna see them kiss and I need it actually, it's canon according to me.

Pink Sugar Polycule [Pink Sugar]

This polycule is end game but I've been sold on them from go. These four sexy lesbians are just all such compelling characters, I want to know more about all of them, their lives when they were human, their lives in Purgatory, and see them thrive together as a little quad of deliciously darling dykes. These are some of my favorite characters ever written and the story is still in it's early days. I imagine in years to follow they will remain a favorite ship. They all feel very different but all feel like a realistic group of people to be friends and be lovers. Every dynamic between them works and they suit each other every way around. Any of them would be an amazing couple but all together their an even better polycule.

Juri and Chun-li [Street Fighter]

Another classic Alexis Sara ship that's got some new spice this year. The release of Street Fighter 6 had a little bit more Juri and Chun-li for us, Juri is still obsessed at the very least. Then we got a few extra tidbits in the You Got This Juri comics. Juri is this messy little disaster Gremlin and Chun-li is a mostly has it together sweet now adoptive mother. I think Juri would add some fun to Chun-lis life and Chun-li would help her get her shit together. I think both of them could help them be morally better people Juri would de-cop Chun-li and Chun-li would help her like not take obviously dubious hit jobs. Their just kinda perfect for each other ya know.

Sailorcule [Sailor Moon]

This is another one that technically had "no new content" like I didn't watch the new movie, I've been waiting for an offical release and it's not happened so here I am but what I did really get into this year was enjoying the inner senshi as a big polycule. I always enjoyed HaruMichi and quickly enjoyed HaruMichiSetsuna but kinda just shipping all the girls together while something on paper was like sure I do that evolved from a sure thing to something I actively really enjoy. A lot of that is thanks to yamino's amazing fan art and my own Magical Girl OCs who are pretty heavily inspired by Sailor Moon so I started to see them in the dynamics between the girls.

Shadowheart and Nocturne [Baldur's Gate 3]

One of this years totally new ships and one I truly adore and wish was more popular was Shadowheart X Nocturne. These two have probably my favorite tropey ship dynamic of them all Childhood friends to lovers. I enjoy all sorts of dynamics but when I am roleplaying, when I am looking at my most beloved ships, I am thinking wouldn't it be cute if they knew each other when they were younger? Nocturne and Shadowheart are so loaded with good little spice in their childhood friends to lovers arc too though. Like Shadowheart and Nocturne both picked their chosen names together. Shadowheart would forget everything with memories being erased and Nocturne would tell her everything and still love her every time. Even after forgetting her again in the most recent events Nocturne remains loyal to her to the point where if Shadowheart becomes a Selunite the sworn enemy of Shar Nocturne despite not having the strength to leave the faith still acts as an inside woman to help Shadowheart evade assassins from Shar. I think the two should get married and live happily ever after and my Tav can marry them both too, I don't see why not and they can both fuck Alyin and Isobel while we're at it. I just want them to be happy together. Outside of Three Houses stuff this is the ship I am most compelled to write fics for simply because no one else is shipping them and I think it's so fucking juicy and why won't anyone sit down with me and eat some of this delicious juicy fruits.

Rae Clair [I'm In Love With The Villainess]

MISSSS CLAIR! Rae's obsession with Clair might frustrate me a bit in the light novel version but in every other version I only find it utterly endearing. I love a good obsession, I love when someone is like on their mind so often and they live for them and it's just ahh so yummy. I think what Rae brings to Clair is really nice for Clair too. Clair feels abandoned constantly, she's lonely and trying to fit a model of a type of person that she's been told she's supposed to be. Rae helps her break those norms, makes her feel not alone, makes her realize she wants to help people. Their really adorable and I do look forward to picking up more of the audiobooks of the light novels and seeing how their relationships evolve along with keeping up with the manga as it releases in English volumes. Their really good and I want to engage them in every medium I can.

Nomoto X Kasuga [She Loves To Cook And She Loves To Eat]

I mean I couldn't not put these two on this list, I want them to kiss and have a house and get married and be together forever. This one has no messy layers, there isn't really the juice but what they have is the true to life, down to it's core, amazing sweetness. It's like a wonderful ice cream dish lovingly crafted down to the last delightfully delicate detail. They just are so good together, they make each other happy, they have a really real feeling healthy slowly building relationship. They both bring out the best in each other and they both always have a good time together. It's really perfect and I think it just feels so honest and sweet and like ya know as a lesbian I feel really seen by them, their relationship, them as characters and the whole story. Nothing is quite as wonderful as She Loves To COok and She Loves To Eat.

If you want to help me enjoy more art then consider checking out my Patreon or Ko-fi .and giving me a little bit of cash so I can do more of this kind of writing but also like make lots of my own art, art is hard to make and costs money and like maintain my chronically ill and trans body also takes money so anything helps, thank you.

[distilledmelancholy]

Pride/Coming out Headcannons

Happy pride month! And happy first post lol. I thought it would be fun to make some headcannons about how the Welcome Home cast would celebrate/ react to you coming out!

Wally Darling

Celebrating

I feel like Wally would not really understand at first

"A special month? What about when it's not June?"

Would walk around to spread the news to the other neighbors about this wonderful thing he just learned called "pride month" (even though everyone already knows what it is)

Coming Out

Depending on what identity you're coming out with, you will most likely need to explain it to him a little bit. He's just a silly little guy after all.

Would probably paint you a picture of something to do with your identity flag or something to show that he loves you no matter what! Best friends stick together

Barnaby B. Beagle

Celebrating

Something tells me this guy can make balloon animals

Would probably make a comedy routine for pride and make jokes that target each neighbor and their identity lol

Coming Out

Would definitely make some out of pocket jokes (in a good way)

Howdy Pillar

Celebrating

Would deck out his bugdega in banners and ribbons and streamers n shit.

Would also change into the most hideously colorful uniform ever. Dear lord the colors clash so bad but hes trying to show his support for his friends!

Would stock up on all the things that the gays need (extra hairspray for Wally, and just a plethora of rainbow things and decorations for the other neighbors)

Coming Out

"Oh, ya don't say?" (already knew)

Would order you something special that reps your flag so you can show your pride!

Eddie Dear

Celebrating

Already has decor and corny outfits ready the first day of pride, and will continue to wear corny ass outfits with rainbows everywhere until the very last day.

Probably has special mail stamps and envelopes too lol

Defintely shows off Frank during this time. He loves his partner!!

Not headcannon but actually cannon... drag queen. Would be a drag queen in Sally's drag shows

Coming Out

"Awesome, more of us!"

Will definitely give you a big ol' hug and get emotional because you trust him enough to come out to him.

Frank Frankly

Celebrating

Will celebrate if his friends are doing something, but won't do anything himself.

But he'll do anything that Eddie asks him to do.

Which means he wears Eddie's god awful accessories so they can match because he just can't say no to his lovely husband.

Coming Out

Would just kind of be like "Okay cool, can you leave my house now? Im kinda busy" (Was about to go butterfly watching)

Julie Joyful

Celebrating

Would go to each neighbor individually and wish them happy pride month!

Would want to play lots of games and have lots of sleepovers to celebrate as much as possible!

Also matching with Eddie and Frank

Coming Out

"beeee who you areeee"

Give you a big happy hug and get suuper excited

Sally Starlet

Celebrating

Would host plays with the main characters being gay or something so probably shakespeare tbh

Host a drag show once a week

Coming Out

"Does this mean you'll be apart of my plays?"

Poppy Partridge

Celebrating

Makes sooo many baked goods you get a stomach ache

Definitely takes over as a mother figure during this month, so if you normall don't have supportive parents shes your mom now :)

Coming Out

Will probably start crying and give you a hug because she loves you so much

So touched that you came out to her

[wolflover33100aj]

Went to one of the malls in Gatlinburg and they have a store that sells bootlegs!

My brother and I were laughing at how dumb some of these bootlegs looked

I wanted to take a picture of them so bad but the sign said we couldn't take pictures, maybe because they didn't want people to see how dumb some of the bootlegs looked!

Came across this FNAF bootleg plush of Nightmare Bonnie and they massacred my boy!

I showed my brother and we laughed at the design

There were tins of FNAF bootleg merch and bootleg anime figures and a plethora of other bootlegs

The only ones that looked normal was the Cuphead and Mugman plushies, I would've bought the Cuphead ones but I already own Cuphead plushies and they looked similar to the ones in the store

There was a also a pride store ( surprising for Tennessee ), the sign said ' Everyone is welcomed except for racists, sexists and homophobes! '

I went into the store with my brother and, unfortunately, my dad ( who's conservative )

I was so scared that my dad was going to say something that would embarres me

The other sign said ' Store rules: No conservatives, don't be mean, no rude behavior " and other stuff I can't remember but I loved it!

There were pride flags and another sign said ' We accept; All sexualities, All cultures, All religions

I loved it and my dad just gave me looks the entire time

[twistedoverbloat]

hey (●’◡’●)ﾉ hru? can I have canons of mc coming out as lesbian to every twst character, even side characters like Neige, Najma and the teachers through text??

Confessing your a Lesbian to the twst characters through text!

Also I'm doing pretty good! Just bored and binge watching Fire force and Sailor Moon!

Heartslabyul

Riddle: When you texted him he didn't text back bc he was scolding Deuce and Ace for somethign but when he saw it he was happy you were comfortable confessing to him about your sexuality!

Trey: goes into proud parent mode. He's telling you it's okay that you don't like boys bc most of them are dumb. He bakes you treats the next tiem you come over to Heartslabyul.

Cater: sent you a meme bc he didn't see the text when you ask again he texts you saying he doesn't care and you are you and you can love who you want to love. He sents you pride posts from Magicam.

Ace: he didn't care and told you your dumb bc you went on a rant of if he didn't want to be friends anymore he told you straight up he would fight a dude for you.

Deuce: he was happy that you confessed to him about your sexuality at first didnt get it but when you explained he asked if you could help him figure out what he identifys as.

Savanaclaw

Leona: didn't see the text bc he was sleeping but when he did see it he told you cool and says he has a cousin that's been looking for a girl he could hook y'all up.

Ruggie: he's seen the ways some kids get treated for being lesbian or even gay. He would never treat you like that and fully supports you.

Jack: fully supports you and will beat up a guy for you and be your wing man. He even asks you if you wanted to go on a jog after this conversation.

Octavinelle

Azul: he nods and asked if you have a girlfriend if not he'll try ad make a contract to make you get the girl you like to get a date.

Jade: he nods then goes on a rant of the mushrooms he collected that day. He fully supports you but he really wanted to telly you about the mushroom he found. Will make a flag out of the different colors he has collected.

Floyd: he didn't understand but when you said you don't like men he nods and then said "So you wanna go talk to that one girl school?" He takes you to one where he knows a chick from there.

Scarabia

Kalim: he's happy you told him and texted you to come over bc he is hosting a feast now. He texted you different pictures of the food he got for it and also texted you to come quickly or the food will go cold.

Jamil: he didn't see the text bc he was cooking for Kalim when you texted Kalim he was full on cooking a feast and now seeing the text he fully supports you and is haply you told him and Kalim.

Pomefiore

Vil: He replied back with that's good now which dress should I get? He got a suit/dress for you bc he is helping you get a girlfriend now. Supports you and helps you dress and do make up for pride.

Rook: he wasn't even fased and asked what type of mademoiselle you were in to! He then asked if you wanted to go to town to see the different girls. You both did go and Vil plus epel came along to shop.

Epel: Cool! Trust me he would have bashed you if you chose anyone from this school. He asked you if you told anyone else if you haven't he'd help you if you have he would be proud.

Ignihyde

Idia: He texted back cool and then asked for you to get online so you both can play a game. He'll hack anyone's account for you. He fully supports you too. Talks about the pretty anime girls he sees all the time.

Ortho: He texted back that it was okay and you shouldn't care what other peoples opinion on who you love! He also quick searched on what it meant and was happy you confessed to him!

Diasomnia

Malleus: Didn't know but is supportive. When you said what it was he nodded, lot's of fae's don't really care for the women should be with men things. Fae's love who they love not caring for gender! He takes you on a walk and fully supports you!

Lilia: He already knew and was waiting fro yuo to text him. When you did he fully supports you. He dosen't care who or what you like he has had girlfriends, boyfriends and everything in-between. He's happy you told him! Will help you hook up with someone-

Silver: was asleep but when he saw the text he said I support you and fell asleep again- He does fully support you but you know he passes out a lot-

Sebek: didn't get it at first but didn't care and lectured you on something you did. When explained he said why would that make a difference? I don't care if you like girls or boys. BUT IF YOU RUN IN THE HALLWAY O N E MORE TIME-

RSA boys

Neige: he was happy you felt comfortable to tell him! He gets you pride flags and talks to you about the nice girls at the photo shoot you go with Vil and him.

Chen'ya: He totally says "Homie me too." And then goes off on like some pretty girls he finds. He fully supports you and honestly trying to hook you up with a cousin of his-

Side character

Najma: she fully supported since she was happy her friend told her she liked girls. She tells you fo the servant's or townswomen who are single to try and get you with one. She nudges you when you look at a girl for too long.

Teachers

Crowley: didn't pay attention, gave you a task then when he saw again he said he fully supports you. Got you a pride flag to make up for giving you too many tasks. If you use that "this is homophobic" on him he will rush to defend himself and he will bend and give you what you want.

Crewel: already knew and told you he supports you and if you want him too he could hook you up with a nice girl he knows through connections. Also wants to dress you up. Tells you to study for the up coming potions test. Glad you won't date any of these bad pups.

Terin: he said he's proud you told him and to make sure not to stay up late since you confessed pretty late. He also told you he won't ever judge you for who you love. He then scolded you when he realized how late it was.

Vargas: he said cool then told you, young children need a good few hours of sleep so go to bed so you can be big and strong for the ladies! He then the next day said he will fully support you and fight any men that try you.

Sam: he already knew and has a bunch of pride flags and other things for you and the other students. He tells you he had a hunch "his friends on the other side" told him. He tells you he won't ever not support you, plus it's nice to know you won't date any of these boys. He won't lie they aren't the best-

[karlyboyyy]

Guys my 70+ year old coworker that I sit next to in our 4-person cubicle bullpen told me this morning that he’s most likely going to retire in January and even though he’s been talking about retiring for years and I knew it was coming I’m like legitimately sad about him leaving because he’s funny and we bitch about a lot of stuff together and he always helps me bounce ideas around for our work and honestly he reminds me of my grandpa who I was really close with but I lost when I was 16, like I’ve always felt really comfortable around this coworker and he’s never batted an eye at all my anime figures or nonbinary pride flag or silly pictures at my desk and he calls me “kiddo” and he always makes sure to tell me when I’ve had a good idea and he values my opinions or suggestions and like maaaaannn I never thought I’d enjoy working with a cynical old man who still prints out every email or document and complains about new technology or processes and makes the occasional questionable remark, but like yeah. I’m gonna miss that dude ☹️

[odysseywritings]

Axez - Starlight Journey

His appearance was ideal. A tall, lean body capable of anything physical. Well-groomed, left parted black hair atop a symmetrical ruggedly handsome face with icy blue eyes. Attractive enough to be photographed as a valiant hero and dangerous enough to seal the deal. Both of which stoked women’s attraction. Haven could see the edges of a black, angular tattoo under his sleeve but he could not decipher it.

“Been a while, friend! We’ve got a lot to catch up on, eh? Let’s shoot the shit while you come to my place.”

“Sounds nice. I can’t stay long, though. Got missions and all.”

“Cryptic as always,” he laughed in good humor. “It’s all good. At least let me show you what all you missed while I had my own ‘missions.’”

Haven remembered Axez being friendly even as a kid. A responsible, confident child who didn’t seem to change outside of being a dutiful adult. He envied Axez for how easy he could tackle anything, not limited by poor eyesight and a bad leg, yet he was too amiable to stay mad at. He was groomed at an early age to be popular by most and was poised for great things.

“How’s life treated you, Haven?”

“A bit shitty, but I’m still alive.”

“Amen to that! I’m honestly surprised to see you out and about. You used to be closed off and brooding.”

“It comes with having a bad deck since birth. But things have been better since I’ve been finding myself.”

“Oh, there you go again. That silly soul searching stuff. You spend too much time in your head when you need to focus on what’s out here! A whole world to grab and take control of. Everyone has a destiny, friend. And it all involves taking what’s yours.”

“Taking what? I’ve got plenty of things. I like finding shiny, cool things if that’s what you mean. Or little animal figures.”

“No, no, not like that. I’m talking bigger things. Like land. The future of our people.”

Haven was confused as Axez continued. He was speaking so broadly and so vaguely. He prodded him to explain.”

“You mentioned animals. Then you’re familiar with the laws of nature. How everyone does what it can to survive and reproduce the next generation. I think that holds true even in our civilization. There’s too many of us who grow up weak and thin. And you know why? Because we’re not getting enough food. Not enough of the things that make life grand. Too much is being taken by free-riders who don’t pull their weight. And when people get too hungry, they fight for food, and it becomes important to fight for what’s ours.”

Haven felt his blood run cold. He wanted to change the subject but it was too late as they met Axez’s house. An impressive, spacious estate with an egg-white veneer and black furniture. The walls had paintings that looked beautiful at a distance. Tall skyscrapers, serene natural landscapes, people with proud faces and athletic bodies. Haven went closer to each one and noticed how void of life everything looked. The subjects were polished and technically well-crafted like photographs or art designed by robots. Even the pictures of people and animals looked like stiff poses for statues.

“And my room is just over on the right. I hope it’s not rude for me to say it’ll have your jaw dropping.”

The two walked closer to the room, and Haven kept staring at more of the paintings, with their uniform sense of aesthetic beauty and powerful imagery. Of note to him was the last picture of soldiers standing tall in a battlefield. Even the corpses looked beautiful and untainted. They looked heroic and flawless while their foes where exaggerated with bug-eyed expressions, fanged teeth, and disheveled appearances.

Axez opened the door and Haven’s stomach dropped.

The room was plastered in so much red that Haven felt a primal anger ready to fight. All these flags and signs with black runic symbols that once held meaning in the past now used for flashy war banners placed alongside medals and badges. Axez had a calm prideful smile. There was nothing sorrowful or guilty in his face.

“You see, Haven,” he said towering over him. “It’s not good to meander through life. You need to be part of something greater. You need ambition so you’re remembered long after you’re dead. And no better way for that to happen than by fighting for your land.”

“It’s all really intense. The people and aliens you’re talking about have lives. They’re not just some enemy ready to kill whenever.”

Axez looked disappointed but quickly perked himself up. “You’ll turn around, friend. After all, nothing is gained without blood. And better theirs gets spilled than ours, right? Like the saying goes: Blood, service, and children.”

“It’s not that simple,” he almost shouted, fearing what would happen if he was too emotional and did something to alert Axez’s war friends. “There’s actual threats coming in from another universe. We need- We need all the help we can get.”

“Hmm? Oh, those. I have to admit, I wasn’t sure about them either. But they’re doing a lot to thin the herd. A lot less mouths to feed with them around. Besides they look human enough. We probably were created in their image and they found a sign to help us out. Good timing!”

Haven was baffled. A mixture of rage and betrayal and shock coursed in his body as he started to shake. “I have to go. This is too fucking much! I don’t want you near anyone I love, got that? Human, alien, whatever!”

Axez shrugged. “Suit yourself. But I hope you realize that you’ll have to pick a side when the last war arrives. And I won’t lose, friend.”

Haven stormed off with monstrous anger, shoving the soldier painting and smashing the frame as it fell, only holding back enough to stop him from being violent. Haven last saw Axez looking on with an unchanging neutral expression and wanted no more. More than ever, he wanted to strengthen his resolve for helping others.

[suckitsurveys]

What name do you go by most often? Hannah.

Have you ever played Geoguessr? Yes, I love that game. Mark and I play together a lot. It drops you off in a random place on Google Maps and you have to figure out where you are based on landmarks and streets and stuff. It’s pretty cool.

How many times have you been to a Disney theme park? Zero.

Are there any live plants in the room with you? Yes, there is an amaryllis and an aloe plant.

Did you grow up with your cousins, first or otherwise? Yeah, I grew up with my first cousin Kelly’s kids mostly. We spent a lot of summers together when we were all little.

Who is your favorite That 70′s Show character, if you have one? Jackie.

What color is your hair? It’s kind of a brassy blonde right now. It needs to be dyed so bad.

Can you see any type of flag from where you are? I can see a pride flag sticker on my cabinet.

Do you eat shellfish? What is your favorite? Yes. I LOVE most shellfish but my favorite is crab.

What’s your favorite theme song to a TV show/cartoon? Oh wow, there’s so many good ones out there it’s hard to choose. BoJack is always up there though.

Are your nails painted? What color? They still have bits of purple on them. I need to get them done so bad too.

What is your favorite way to eat chicken? With my mouth. Hah. I prefer in tender/strip/finger/popcorn/nugget/boneless wing form. Also in taco form.

Can you name all the major sports teams in your city/state? Bulls, Cubs, Bears, Blackhawks, White Sox, Fire.

Do you use a comb or a hairbrush or both? Mostly just a hairbrush.

What was the last movie you watched? I can’t remember actually. It’s been a bit since I watched a movie.

Have you ever seen BoJack Horseman? Oh yes. It’s my favorite show of all time.

What color is your house/building? It’s a weird yellowy-tan.

Do you know the middle name of the person you last talked to in person? I do. It’s Alan. I know this only because it used to be on all his outgoing emails.

What is today’s date? How many days til your birthday? It’s June 15. There’s about 2 and 1/2 months til my birthday

When is the last time you had Starbucks? Monday.

What is your favorite number? Does it have to do with a specific date? 24. It was the day my cousin was born, the day Mark asked me out, the day we got married, the day my niece was born, and the day my kitty was born. All in different months/years, of course.

Do you watch SNL? Who are your favorite cast members? Oh yessssss. I used to watch it with my parents every time it was on and then I stopped for a while but I got back into it recently. I have SO many favorites man. So many amazing people came from that show. Lemme try to narrow it down to 10? Lol. A mix of all time favorite and current favorites: Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Bill Hader, Andy Samberg, Pete Davidson, Molly Shannon, Cecily Strong, Seth Meyers, Aidy Bryant, Michael Longfellow.  Yeah I’ll go with those but there are SO many more lol.

What color is your phone? The phone itself is blue. My case is pink.

Do you have any siblings? Yeah, an older sister.

How many hours of sleep do you get a night? Never enough.

What did you have for lunch? I brought a salad I’ll eat later.

Favorite streaming service? They all have their perks lol.

Who is your favorite Pokemon? I’m basic af but Pikachu.

Do you like soup? What kinds? I do. I love a good bisque haha.

When was the last time you flew on a plane? In February.

What is your favorite movie Paul Rudd has been in? Wet Hot American Summer and Clueless.

What room of your house (or otherwise) are you in? I am in my office at work.

What style of pizza do you prefer (thin crust, stuffed crust, deep dish, detroit style, etc)? I love a good thin crust tavern style that’s really saucy and cheesy. I also like deep dish.

Can you see your favorite animal from where you are sitting? (on an article of clothing, a figurine, a stuffed animal, etc...maybe even alive?) I have 3 favorite animals and I can see all of them in one way or another. Cats: picture of my cats, some cat magnets, a cat figure above my computer, and a cat mug. Bats: several bat cut outs on the wall by me, bat lights above my computer, a bat planter, a neon bat light, a wooden bat figure. Pandas: i have a litte panda plush on my desk, a magnet with a panda on it, and panda sticky notes.

Do you know how to play the card game Skip-Bo? Yes, I love Skip-Bo.

What was the last museum you went to? The Museum of Science and Industry. Wait, no. An art museum when I was in Boston.

What was the last celebrity gossip you got sucked into? Anything involving Pete Davidson ahahaha. The last thing was his whole voicemail he left to PETA and that whole bullshit.

Do you own any merch from concerts/comedy shows/broadway shows, etc? Oh yes. I always try to buy something from any thing I see live if there’s stuff available. The last thing I purchased was a totebag and a sticker from the Tina Fey and Amy Poehler Restless Leg Tour.

What was the last thing to annoy you? Work.

Who is your favorite comedian? John Mulaney.

What are some names you like that start with the first letter of your name? Harriet, Hattie, Henry, Harlow, Harris.

When is the next time you’ll be in a pool or body of water? Hopefully Monday!!!

[wildtulipfield]

Resources for faceclaims/forms

A whole bunch of character creator resources for anyone trying to find their perfect faceclaim/form (Or just want to play dressup games all night XD) Sorry I couldn't put pictures for all of them since the limit is 10. If anyone knows of any more feel free to let me know if you want.

Artbreeder

Website, Realistic

Artbreeder is a website that lets you make face claims by mashing different faces and facial features together. Sometimes the results are a bit weird but it's super fun to use. You can merge faces and use gene sliders to make unique AI generated faces that can look real or like a painting. There are also anime and furry versions but they don't work as well.

Link: artbreeder.com

Picrew

Website, All styles

Picrew is a website where people upload their own character creators and there are 1000s of them. Most people have heard of this website and many of the creators have pride flags. It can be accessed on both phone and computer. (Link)

Meiker

Website, Varied

Similar to picrew but it's more focused on clothing and dress up. Many of them are full body and focus more on fashion than being the perfect character creator. (Link)

Doll divine (+Rinmaru)

Website, Varied

A website with many character creators and dressups. Some made by the creator and some by other artists, older dress ups are still being converted from flash to html. This website also hosts dressups for other creators but has her own exclusive collection. (Link)

Pastelkatto

Website and a few apps, stylized

(Formerly missangest) Is a website/app creator who makes themed character makers such as 'Monster girl dollmaker' and 'Assassin dollmaker' in html. Most of these dollmakers are feminine in style. The creator also hosts dollmakers from others on her site. (Link)

Azaleas dolls

Website, Stylized

This one is similar to doll divine and Pastelkatto. Some of her old dress ups still require flash but newer ones are being made with HTML. Like the other two this website hosts dressups made by other people and most are feminine in style. (Link)

Vroid

App/desktop program, anime mostly..

Vroid runs on both android and desktop but the desktop version is very in-depth, you can edit textures and sculpt hair so the options are infinite. If you have a little knowledge on blender and unity you can upload your models to vrchat and let your headmates walk around and socialize without appearance dysphoria (I've done this myself it's super fun.) I recommend Argama witch's tutorials if you have never made a model before.

You can download it here (Link) or on steam, find/buy already made assets here (Link) and can see other peoples models here (Link)

Custom cast

App, Anime

This is a cute anime style 3d modeler app, it's similar to the android version of vroid but as far as I'm aware you can't upload these to vrchat. There is a face tracking option meant for vtubing though. You can create both male and female characters.

Sims4

Game, Semi-realistic - realistic

I don't recommend getting this game just for the "create a sim" as the unmodded base game doesn't have too much variety. You can build houses too. (Link)

Heroforge

Website, 3d cartoonish

This is a website mostly meant for ttrpg characters, you can customize a 3d figure with lots of options for weapons and armor. There are also options for 3d printing. (Link)

Kisekae

Program(pc), Anime

This is a bit hard to access but has a lot of options. Most of the clothes and body options are feminine leaning. This game does have some explicit 18+ options and ads.

Here's a guide on how to download (Link)

Lunaii Dollmaker

Website, pixel anime

An old pixel avatar maker. Has a good amount of options but is only a face portrait. It has both feminine and masculine styles and a cool color picker. (Link)

Old flash dressups

Swf, varied

These are tricky to access these days, but if you download an older version of flash you will be able to play these old .swf file games. Here's (link) a guide for that by Doll divine, you can also use a method for the older dressups of Doll divine and Azaleas dolls.

You can mostly download these on deviant art, here are some specific ones.

Mew mew creator

This is a flash dress up based around the show Tokyo mew mew, it has a color picker and tons of options for animal ears, wings and tails. The base and clothing style is feminine. The creator is Hapuriainen. You can download it here (Link)

School dress up

This one is basically like the Tokyo mew mew one but with school clothes. This one is also by Hapuriainen. You can download it here (Link)

Gen8's Chibi maker

This one is just a simple chibi maker with limited colors but a great range of clothing and features. (Link)

Dragon maker

A dragon maker with a color picker and tons of options by Wyndbain (Link)

[liitlesunshiine]

Villainous Taste

(Detective reader x Villain Bakugo)

Warnings: NSFW, smut, mentions of death, degradation, manipulation, very bad bad stuff, dubcon, noncon, assault, sub/dom themes, don’t read if sensitive to violent themes

_________________

You sighed in frustration at your desk that was fully covered with a mountain of papers. It’s been over year now since you’ve been assigned to the notorious Bakugo, Katsuki case; and you’ve made little to no progress on catching the pesky fucking villain. You were losing your patience by the day. Especially since it felt like a personal attack on your ego that you still haven’t managed to pin this guy down. The great detective Y/N, Y/LN getting played and taken a fool by the villain himself. It’s not like you’ve made no progress though. There were times, many instances in fact, when you managed to pin the villain down. The constant face to face encounters only ending with the villain toying with you and taunting you. It’s honesty a surprise that you’re still alive considering all the chances he has had to kill you. Condescending dick, you were sure he was getting off by the chase. This all seemed to be a game to him and it infuriated you even more since you were practically entertaining it. He was thriving off the little interactions with the quirkless detective.

The way he would cockily stride his way to you with that big smirk smeared across his face. Eyes devouring your body that left an unsteady chill run down your spine. His presence held such power and intimidation that you couldn’t help but take steps back with every step he took forward. You always felt like a deer in headlights whenever he swaggered towards you. No amount of experience or expertise will ever get you accustomed to his predatory gaze.

“Go figure they’d send a quirkless bitch my way. They must really hate’ya.” He said with a rather amusing look, never breaking his eye contact with you. He grabbed a piece of your hair twisting it softly between his fingers, as if he were inspecting it. You could’ve sworn he was sniffing it too.

Yea, you were quirkless but you managed to hold your own ground. Having to work ten times as hard, having to prove yourself among your peers and having to earn the respect and position you have worked so tirelessly for years. While being quirkless was a hinderance or handicap as some would say, it was a mountain that you decided needed to be climbed. You reached its peak and planted your flag years ago. This title wasn’t given to you mindlessly. You dedicated tears, sweat, and blood to get to where you are now. Gained recognition from higher up heroes themselves and even managed to get assigned to Bakugo’s case; the most wanted and powerful villain in Japan. Now, you weren’t in denial either, you were well aware you stood no chance against the hero toe to toe. Hell, even the top tier heroes themselves barely made it out alive. You were simply here to pinpoint his locations and set up an area for his arrest. What seemed to be a simple task ended up as a wide scale massacre with Bakugo skimping through all the heroes nonchalantly. It was a complete blood bath. All the pro heroes who were posted for defense that day were to be blown up to pieces; the graphic scene till this day haunts you in your sleep. Sleepless nights and paranoia became a norm, with the image of him dripping with blood casually stalking towards you was something that you have not been able to shake out of your head for months now.

He had forced you into an alley that day. You were trying your best to steady your breathing and figure out an attempt to get the fuck out of this predicament. Your eyes skimmed for any opening, avoiding his intense gaze, looking anywhere but his blooded face.

You felt your back hit against the wall. He was now sickly close to you, you placed your head down in shame looking at his shoes rather than his face. Knowing damn well there was no way out of this situation. Beads of sweat ran down your back and colored your forehead. He slammed both his hands against the wall, causing you to jump, your head now trapped in between his forearms. His body hovered over, the smell of blood forcing its way into your nose. The intense body heat radiating off of him, had your head spinning. You felt frozen in place, every worst case scenario rushing through your mind, trying to stay steady while silently sobbing to yourself.

“My eyes are up here slut.” He gripped your chin roughly forcing your eyes to meet his. You took in the rough image of the villain in front of you. You saw the spiky unruly hair sticking out in every direction, some parts drenched in the blood of his victims. His sharp facial features looked even more intimidating under this light, little scars freckled his skin here and there scattered throughout; and his 5 o'clock shadow appearing in patches. It was his eyes that took you by surprise most. None of the pictures posted online, none of the documents you saw ever matched what appeared in front of you. The dark ruby colored eyes stared curiously back at you, analyzing your every move. The stare felt strangely intimate, and it probably would’ve been considering the circumstance. Y/N wasn’t sure if she was really fully conscious of what was happening, but having him so close was making her feel unnerved. Hell, even as a villain there are many people who admire and drool over the criminal. But seeing him this up close drenched in the blood of your peers was when the fear and guilt washed over you and you quickly snapped out of his trance. You were brought back to your senses and reminded of your current predicament. The images of the heroes fighting and dying at the hands of this animal quickly flooded in. Anger now overwhelming your sense. You reminded yourself that you were quirkless, not helpless. And with that thought, you broke your intense gaze away from him, slapping his hand off your chin and quickly spitting in his face. The action caught him rather off guard and you took this delayed response to knee him in the balls and bolt for it “FUCKING BITCH!” He roared.

~

Ever since then your encounters with Bakugo have been rather odd to say the least. You didn’t really know how else to describe it. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking. There were instances where he would get rather “touchy” and others where he would straight up just physically hurt you. It was a wind whirl of emotions and odd behavior whenever you encountered him. You didn’t know what to make of it either. He could’ve killed you months ago and the fact that he hasn’t, has left you feeling uncomfortable and confused. You felt yourself wanting to avoid him now, you haven’t been prioritizing his case anymore and you’ve lost all the spunk and passion you had in the beginning. Continuously failing to catch him and having countless of pro heroes dying at the hands of his explosions was something you no longer had the heart to bare.

Especially now that whenever you found him he’d just toy with you. It was beginning to seem as if he's looking forward to these little encounters, like he’s waiting for you. You began to notice the issue when he was becoming purposefully sloppy in hiding his tracks, it was if he was screaming to be caught. And after working his case for over a year Y/N knew his actions, how careful and precise he could be when he wanted to. A perfectionist in his own right but now, now he was practically waving a flag yelling at you where he is and to come and get him. This was a total 180 from his usual behavior and tactic and with each encounter becoming more unseemly; Y/N thought it was best to take a break from the scandalous villain. You decided on no longer participating on the missions. You couldn’t shake off the eerie feeling of this situation and where you were once so headstrong stepping into the battlefield, your courage and pride was stripped from you. Now the only thing you prioritize was staying the hell away from him. So with whatever information you did find on the villain was quickly handed over to the hero agency without any hesitation.

~

After a few months of you steering clear from the villain, his crime scenes were becoming more brutal and graphic by the week. His killing sprees drastically increasing and the victims were piling up. Y/N couldn’t help but to let guilt consume her. Thoughts of Bakugo infiltrated Y/N’s mind. From the moment she woke up, to while she’d desperately attempt to sleep. You felt yourself slowly going insane. As if your movements were being watched at all times. Your mental state began taking a toll on you and was affecting your work. You could no longer focus on anything for a span of time without the mere image of a bloodied Bakugo appearing in your head.

His case was one you guiltily found compassion in. One of the top students in UA Academy showing nothing but absolute potential to become a top ranking hero crumbled and fell to villainy after his long time friend Izuku Midoriya, was killed trying to save him. It appeared the guilt ate him up inside and as a result, Bakugo quickly blamed the heroes for being weak and unable and decided on taking matters to his own hands by killing everyone involved that day in Midoriya’s death. This paired on with him living in an abusive household led to what he is now, at least that’s what Y/N assumed. Y/N’s heart felt torn in two feeling somewhat sympathetic towards him due to his rough upbringing and traumatic past but either way it did not excuse the atrocities he was committing now. You felt yourself falling deeper into the rabbit hole because of this man. You finally decided this couldn’t continue on any longer. You requested a transfer, figure you cut your losses with Bakugo’s case and move on with your life.

~

It had been two weeks since you’ve transferred departments and moved into the inner city of Tokyo. It was new, it was adventurous, and it was a step forward. A perfect way to start fresh and move on. You felt the withdrawals from Bakugo’s case every now and then, mainly the guilt consuming you at night or whenever you saw the news appear on TV with a new crime he had committed. You did your best to avoid those emotions though. He was no longer your problem and you did everything you could anyways. Regardless, your attempts at catching him always resulted with blood on your hands.

It was a particular long day at work. You decided on staying later than usual setting up the finishing touches in your new office. You figured you’d also catch up on some cases to avoid getting swamped on Monday. By the end of it you came to realize it was a quarter past midnight. “Oh shit, I gotta get the hell outta here,’ you mumbled to yourself while you quickly got your personal things and organized the remaining loose ends in the office. You locked up everything and exited out the building, deciding on taking the metro home since you felt exhausted and couldn’t commit to the 2 mile walk.

You weren’t used to the metro being so empty and silent, but it was rather peaceful you thought. While the doors open you took no notice in the looming figure behind you. Exhausted and empty minded you walked in, to the doors behind you closing. You were instantly snapped out of your daze when you got shoved against the pole and a hand quickly covering your mouth to silence your scream.

“I’m real upset quirkless.” You immediately recognized the voice and a chill ran down your spine. You looked up to see the reflection of Bakugo off the window, he was staring at you dead in the eye. His signature scowl heavily evident on his face.

“Are you trying to hide from me? Made me follow your ass all the way to Tokyo now? Come on quirkless, you know I hate being teased.” He positioned himself to have his crotch lined up with your ass. You felt the pressure only getting bigger with each word he spoke. Your heart was racing by this point, you tried to wiggle your way out of his grasp but he only gripped you harder as a result. He pulled your hair forcing you to look at him once again through the reflection.

“What happened slut, got bored of me? Am I not important enough anymore to catch? I’ve killed hundreds of people ya know, why did you stop trying to arrest me? Don’t tell me another villain got your attention. I don’t mind killing off the competition babe.” He gripped your hair even harder to the point where your skull was becoming numb, your cheeks already salted with tears.

“Fucking slut, I should seriously punish you. You’ve been making me work overtime.”

The train did a gradual stop and the doors open once again with two individuals walking in. Y/N felt a bit of hope wash over her until Bakugo moved to sit down on the opposite direction, forcing you on top and both your backs facing the two people who just walked in. Since he was wearing a hoodie no one would be able to recognize him from this angle. Right now the situation looked like two people who are just foundling on the train. You now sat directly on top of the villain’s lap. His hand still covering your mouth harshly. When you felt the bulge in his pants fully erect is when you began to whimper.

“Awe, did my slut miss me? Don’t worry detective, I’ll give you some nice warranted attention.” His free hand began to stroke your exposed thigh. The action immediately had you squish your thighs together and attempt to get away. But he simply responded with gripping you tighter.

“Try anything and I’ll fucking take you right here, right now. I’ll blow up everyone in this fucking train. Try me bitch.”

He placed a testing hand on your thigh and tapped it softly as if waiting for your reaction. You stayed still not daring to move. “Come on baby, open up for your favorite villain.”

You silently nodded your head no, more tears springing out. He gripped your thigh roughly.

“Y/N, I won’t ask again. Fucking open.” The authority and venom that came from that demand left you having goosebumps. The fear reached you and before you knew it, you had your legs opened and spread for him.

"Atta girl.” He hummed satisfied and began stroking your inner thigh. Absolute shame and guilt overtaking your senses, you felt completely out of control and held prisoner. Your mind trying to disassociate itself with the current reality you’re in right now. But only to being brought back with his rough hands violating you and his threatening tone looming over you. “Now, I’m gonna release my hand from your mouth. If you make any fucking noise, I’ll kill everyone in this metro and make you watch while they beg for their lives, m’kay.” You nodded rather quickly, you wouldn’t be dumb enough to even dare to do such a thing. Too many people have already fallen victim to this animal, you refuse to take part in anymore blame for it. You’d figure you just let him use you and quickly get over the situation and forget it ever happen. Maybe you’ll set up an attempt to try and kill him yourself. Either way, the sooner this is over the sooner you get to go home and ball your eyes out and come up with a plan. He hummed again with your response.

“Good girl.” His hand slowly and hesitantly left your mouth and snaked its way to your thighs. He gripped both of them and forced your legs to open wider.

"Really liking the skirt baby. Makes accessing you so much easier.” He chuckled in your ear, mocking you. Ironic considering this is the first time you’ve worn a skirt in over a year. Your fucking luck. This whole thing was just entertainment for him, bastard.

His hands slowly made themselves lower reaching the inner most part of your thighs. He pulled the skirt up, completely showcasing your thong and pantyhose. You practically heard him salivating behind you. You tried to close your legs feeling painfully embarrassed.

“Tsk. What did I say Y/N” he forced your legs apart once again but with more aggression and speed, that lead you to buckle your hips onto him. You instantly became flushed, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks at the realization of what you just did. You heard him groan.

“Such a fucking tease.” He ripped your pantyhose apart, giving him full entrance to your underwear. The cold air had a cooling sensation on your inner thighs and you felt yourself softy throb. You let out a silent whine and he quickly shoved two of his fingers in your mouth while the other started doing soft circles on your clit.

“Fuck quirkless. You’re so wet, always knew you were a fucking whore for me.”

Even to your surprise you didn’t expect yourself to be this hot and ready for him. You felt completely betrayed by your body but you couldn’t help in relishing in the sensation. It felt so good to finally be touched by someone even if it was someone as vile as him. Is this what it feels like to have the most dangerous man about finger fuck you on the metro train? Maybe you can just pretend you’re getting touched by Jim- the cute and quirky coworker of yours, but with every flick even that was seeming to be difficult already. You were sucking and licking his fingers shamelessly and subconsciously grinding down on his erection. You were definitely disgusted from yourself. But you’d be lying if the thought of fucking this villain hasn’t crossed your mind. Especially with the constant harassment you faced whenever you crossed paths, how he’d violate you but never to this extent. Always leaving you in an array of emotions. Even now you’re having a hard time understanding what exactly is happening.

Your eyes snapped right open when the fingers in your mouth left to slap your pussy. You glared at him with a concerning look. He only smiled in response, the sadistic kind.

“You seemed distracted baby. Got me doing all this work and you’re not even paying attention.”

His wet fingers hooked your underwear and causally pulled them off. You were now completely exposed and the reality of the situation was settling on you. “Bakugo please don’t.”

“After you were sucking and grinding on me? Don’t act so innocent now bitch, you’re fucking soaked. Pussy is practically begging for my cock.”

He slipped one finger inside slowly, as if he was exploring the inside of your pussy. His fingers were thick and scarred due to years of using his quirk. The sensation alone was enough for you to throw your head back on his shoulder, opening your legs wider for him. You couldn’t grasp the reason for your actions. Here you were shamelessly opening yourself up and enjoying the fingers of a villain who has caused so much destruction and brought about so much pain in your life. How is it that you’re enjoying this? You really are a terrible person.

“Fuck baby, this is quite the sight.”

Any attempt in trying to hide what you and Bakugo were doing was completely thrown out the window by the sloppy and lewd noises from the villain fingering you. You began to bite your bottom lip in attempt to hold back the moans trying to escape you when he added a second finger.

“Don’t hold them noises back, let these people know how good you feel from just by my fingers slut.” By this point you couldn’t control the soft noises coming out of you even though you were trying. He was fingering you with such expertise, you were feeling yourself beginning to melt under him. When was the last time someone had touched you liked this? Are you so touch starved that you’re about to cum from out of all people- Bakugou Katisuki? Your mind was spinning.

The train reached its second stop. You tried to close your legs and compose yourself before the doors had open but Bakugo didn’t stop his assault. “Bakug-“

“Keep them open baby. We’ll put on a show for whoever sees. I don’t give a fuck.”

The only two passengers who were on the train walked out rather quickly and with no one else entering, it was just you and this villain inside. You couldn’t tell if that was a good thing or bad but at least the risk of him hurting someone else isn’t looming over your head. Instead of taking this moment to escape you threw your arms up gripping Bakugo by the neck. Might as well and try to get this over with. Sooner this ends, the sooner you get go home and bleach your skin clean and pray for forgiveness to whichever god decides to listen. This action did indeed catch him slightly by surprise but he stopped fingering you momentarily and ripped your shirt off revealing your bra to him. He quickly gripped both of your breasts massaging them in his hand.

“Turn around.” He huskily said into your ear. Already lost in the sensation of how good he was making you feel, you quickly got off him to then get back on straggling him. You were now back on him facing him with your cunt completely exposed, skirt crumbled up to your waist, and your breasts directly in his face. He was smirking down on you. He gripped the center of your bra and activated his quirk leaving the bra in shreds.

“Any idea how long I’ve been wanting to fuck this pretty little body of yours?” He gripped your neck, choking you slightly while his mouth made his way to your nipple. “Way too fucking long. Gonna devour your little cunt. Gonna make you pay for all the trouble you’ve been causing me.” His hand left your throat and began squeezing and pinching your nipple. The action causing a moan to rip out of you. “Fucking bitch, you’ve been such a distraction.” You were gripping and pulling his hair now while grinding furiously against his crouch in a desperate attempt to feel some type of friction. “Bakugo-“

“Katsuki,” he corrected, “we’ve been past the formalities for a while now”

You blushed, you rarely call anyone by their first name but Bakugo could be the exception. Besides it’s not like he wasn’t fingering your pussy like a jackhammer on a public train 5 minutes ago, not like you were grinding on him like a desperate dog in heat right now...

“Suki,” you said hoping the cute pet name would be enough to grab his attention, you attempted to sound as desperate and needy as possible, “please make me cum already.” You pleaded while placing your hands on his shoulders. Makeup smudged from the tears and sweat, lipstick smeared on your chin from him covering it, clothes all ruined and your hair a mess, you already looked so fucked out, Bakugo just ate the sight up. He had his hands gripping the side of your hips caressing them. You leaned in wanting a kiss until he quickly gripped your face squeezing your cheeks together preventing it so. “On your knees baby.”

While still squeezing your face you slowly get off his lap on your knees in between his legs.

“Open your mouth and show me your tongue.” He released his tight grip but kept his hand in place, you opened your mouth and slowly stuck out your tongue. He gave a devious smirk, in which you saw something enlighten in his eyes. The bright red color seeming more mahogany now. He leans in lining his mouth above yours and spits on your tongue. He nods his head allowing you to swallow, which you complied easily to. You now waited patiently for his next orders, your full submissive side completely taking over, not like you have much of a choice anyways. Regardless, the desire to please him and the desperation from under is consuming your every thought and sensation.

“Go on slut, suck daddy’s cock.” He leans into the seat with his legs fully spread to you. You slowly unzip his pants with shaking hands allowing his dick to spring free. You nearly drooled at the sight wanting to taste him badly. He was completely erect, a huge vain running down the base of his cock, the tip already covered in precum looking swollen and red. You lean in his dick using your hands to pump him, you slowly bought the tip towards your mouth giving it small kitten like licks. As you began sucking the villain in front of you, he lets out small grunts and groans throughout. He eventually pulls your hair and shoves his dick entirely in your mouth forcing itself to hit the back of your throat. 10 seconds pass by and he hasn’t removed his hand, 11, 12… your eyes begin watering and you’re desperately attempting to get fresh air. You begin pulling away only for Katsuki to laugh and hold you down tighter. “Aha’ha choking on my dick detective? Such a cock hungry whore… this outa teach you a lesson, maybe I’ll get some hand cuffs late-later on and treat you like you really deserve, yea-yeah. That sounds soo good.”

While Bakugo goes back and forth with himself, you begin getting red faced and losing consciousness he pulls your hair up forcing you off and you while you take this opportunity to weed in gaps of air desperately and choking, he quickly shoves himself back inside your mouth. This time he moved your head in up/down motions, you attempted your best to slurp and suck with minimal oxygen entering your system, but it was proven to be very difficult, luckily enough you notice the villain becoming slower and sloppier with his movements. You brought yourself to deep throat his cock once more until the warm liquid has finally entered your mouth. The taste sour and sticky inside, this is what sin must taste like you thought.

As on cue, the metro did a halt and you instantly recognized the location. You gave a side eye to the villain next to you who also knew this was the stop to your neighborhood. He self confidently got up and immediately zipped his pants. He took off the hoodie he wore only leaving the black tank top underneath and shoved it over your head. The hoodie was long enough to cover your whole body and you were thankful since your current garments were in shreds across the floor. It also smelled strangely sweet, odd, like burnt caramel? Maybe the lack of oxygen is making you slightly delusional? You assumed, well hoped- this is where you would go separate ways with the villain. Have this memory go to the grave with you and forget it ever happened. But to your lovely surprise he picks you up bridal style and carries you out the metro. You looked at him questioningly, the feeling of dread looming over and suddenly becoming overwhelming just waiting for his response. He simply smirked.

“You’re clocking in overtime tonight detective.”

[steppin-on-the-last-train]

halloween

Summary: A rival assassin interrupted your mission, effectively ruining your night. As time passed and you allowed yourself a moment with her, you couldn’t help but wonder if you’d met before.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x gn!reader

Warning(s): talks of HYDRA, red room, a paragraph of violence, memory loss, drinking, a half-baked idea

Word Count: 3.7k

a/n: very loosely based off the phoebe song. #pharb

The whole event was a little too gauche in your opinion, not that it mattered. The dazzling outfits meant to be a show of class looked more like desperate attempts to make up for personal deficits. Each individual milled about, some stopping to talk in groups, all oblivious to the danger lurking near. Not in the shadows, well no more so than they were, but a needle in the gray haystack.

HYDRA had its tentacles sunk deep into every crevice society had to offer and at every given moment their reach only lengthened.

You were a vessel, their favorite tool they could use to tweak the balance in their favor. Hence, your arrival at this rather glamorous party. You had a job to do, and that’s where your unwavering attention fell. All energy funneled exactly where it was supposed to be, a bullet cruising home. Powerful and direct.

There was a man here, one that you’d been ordered to eliminate. You don’t know why him and why here, that simply being information you aren’t privy to. It would take your focus away from the objective. No witnesses. Extraction in one hour. A picture and a name is what you had to work with.

You stood near the edge of the gigantic ballroom, surveying each occupant with laser focus. It appeared as if the crowd was a mix of the filthy rich elite and the criminals that helped fund their careers and a healthy group of escorts. You were posing among the latter, working to enrapture the target and take him up to one of the many hotel rooms lining the floors above.

The masks that obscured the features of the attendants made it more difficult to spot the man. Some were adorned with brightly exotic feathers, others prideful with expensive silks and jewels, and still more disguised as majestic animals.

The one on your face was far simpler than most, elegant and sleek without appearing obnoxious; and most importantly allowed for the greatest field of vision. The point wasn’t to draw the eyes of the room, only to captivate one set.

The dim lighting also made your task more complicated. These people and their need to be extravagant were starting to gnaw on your patience. Instead of flicking the many electric lightbulbs on, the vast majority were powered down in favor of candles and a giant chandelier that was very lowly lit.

Although a nuisance, these factors would never serve to stop you, you’d stand there forever, waiting and watching if that’s what they wanted. The mission is all that mattered. Your eyes flickered around the room, catching onto a face before moving on to analyze the next. Whenever someone might have chosen to stare back, you’d hide your attention for a moment behind your glass of champagne before continuing on.

Finally you spotted the man. He looked even sleazier than he had in the picture you’d been shown, perhaps it would make the kill go down easier. You flagged down a waiter and handed off your empty glass before striding across the room.

It wasn’t hard to make your way through the crowd, slipping among the throng of expensive perfumes and colognes alike completely unnoticed. He hadn’t moved since you’d marked him a minute ago, standing in a small group of people who all look like they’ve paid their way here in blood.

You knew exactly how to play this game, the practice of dozens of situations exactly like this one aiding you now. Tapping him on the shoulder, you immediately locked eyes with him, appearing innocent and curious.

His eyes greedily raked over your figure and you fought to suppress a shudder at the hunger in his stare. Of course this was exactly how things were supposed to go, and the more eager the man the easier the mission, but you still weren’t appreciative of his gaze practically undressing you on the spot. You saw his eyes catch on parts of your form where the fabric was tailored just right; showing off your admirable physique.

A chorus of snickers and low whistles emitted from his companions as you offered a hand to him without saying a word. From the lack of surprise on any of their faces you assumed he was a leader among this group and they’d been expecting him to step out first.

He made a wildly inappropriate comment before accepting your invitation and allowing you to whisk him across the floor. Determined to rush him upstairs and get it over with you moved quickly through the crowd and toward an extravagant staircase, wide and lined with marble. You snuck suggestive glances over your shoulder every couple of seconds, using the allure to pull him farther into the trap.

Just as you’ve reached the edge of the bubble of people you felt his grip on your hand tighten and upon looking back he stood rooted in his spot.

“Come, let’s dance before we play.”

His drawl was slimy as well and you could tell his breath reeked of alcohol and held a general pungency. You wished the small orchestra playing from the corner of the lobby wasn’t providing such a charming tune, maybe you wouldn’t have to waste time entertaining your target.

Nonetheless you obliged, dipping your head slightly and turning to fully face him. He asked you to finish off his drink for him, managing to slip in an unsettling pet name as he did. The ice clinked against the glass as you downed the scotch, managing to keep a straight face despite being way too much to be chugging.

A trollish grin spread on his face to reveal sour teeth, but all you could focus on was the burning in your throat left by the drink. Beckoning you closer like an owner would his dog, you pressed your body close to his and began to sway to the music.

It wasn’t really dancing, he was far too uncoordinated to keep to the beat and it was rather akin to a fox with a bear; even if you were taller than him. The overpowering stench of cologne reached you and a sickly sweat showed on his brow. His bloated stomach pressed against his belt and even the price tag of his suit couldn’t hide the grossness rolling off of him in waves.

You knew you looked good though, it was your job for tonight. The sharp suit that you wore was matte black, including the undershirt that was worn unbuttoned to reveal your collarbone and the beginning of your chest. The mask hiding the upper half of your face was black as well with a ghosting of silver glitter sprinkled around like stars in a perfect night sky. The outline of the piece was colored in the same tint as well; just flashy enough.

You put up with it though, him, the entire triviality of this place and this dance for the mission; for your superiors. You let him grip you in inappropriate places and you whispered sultry promises in his ear as you circled the room. You had long given up on trying to actually help him dance, it was obvious he had not the grace nor the sobriety to try.

Throughout the next few minutes you minutely shifted the two of you back towards the staircase. The small, razor sharp knife laying flush against your thigh practically begging to be used. For the second time you gestured up in an effort to persuade him to get alone with you, even dipping your head down to brush your lips over his ear.

His pupils widened in a drunken lust and he nodded eagerly, allowing you to pull him along. You had him, and you finally let your thoughts wander to pushing the blade against his throat and watching him bleed out. You would have to watch your clothes though, wouldn’t want blood all over this fancy shirt. The smallest of smirks edged its way onto your face as the image of him lying there like a stuck pig formed in your imagination.

Too caught up in your victory you failed to notice a woman striding confidently towards you in what would be an obvious manner; if you’d been paying an ounce of attention to your surroundings. A gentle hand intercepted your path upstairs and worked to sever your connection with the target.

“Excuse me, I need to borrow this one. We won’t be long.” She spoke in a rush of fluttering eyelashes and an apologetic smile. At first the man’s face warped into annoyance, but the expression was quickly replaced with a besided glance upon glimpsing the woman’s face.

You watched him wander off like a fish free from a hook and you shot the interferer an angry glance before starting after him. Before you could get two steps away someone caught your wrist from behind and tugged on your arm. It wasn’t urgent by any means, but you caught the warning. Don’t, or things will get messy.

You spun around and saw it was the same woman who had caused the man to leave in the first place. The sweet facade she had constructed just moments before had completely dissolved, a dangerous glint sparking in her eyes. The shadows flickering across her face made her look more mysterious and deadly and you couldn’t help but draw closer.

She was the spitting image of your equal, a fight wouldn’t end in anything other than a tie, both agents stubborn as bulls and reactive as the wittiest of felines. There was a slit up the side of her dress, what it left to reveal being a weapon in its own right, deadly as a blade and infinitely more appealing.

You didn’t know for sure who the hell this was, but you had a pretty good guess. Only one organization was bold enough to challenge HYDRA’s agenda, the only one with agents capable of rivaling theirs. This was a widow standing in front of you, daring you to make a move.

You almost did, but you weren’t that stupid. If you left her in the dust she’d cause a scene, the target would flee, and your mission would be a double fail. An escaped objective was bad enough, but a scene tonight would cause a panic that would scatter the people here for weeks to come, making another attempt all that harder. You’d play her game.

Unmoving, your wrist caught in her grasp, you chose to stare her down, matching the intensity in her gaze. The crowd revolved around you, oblivious to the two assassins locked in a standstill, frozen in their own world.

Your heartbeat roared against your eardrums as you waited in apprehension for what she might do. If you were a fox she was a cat, and this time you’d been outsmarted. It also seemed as if she was searching for something, like she was looking into your soul and it made you wildly uncomfortable. No one should be able to do that, and yet she seemed confident in her ability to humanize you.

Apparently she was finished with her prying, although you weren’t certain if she was satisfied with what she might or might not have found, stilling for a moment and leveling out her demeanor. In a flash she switched up again, pulling you close and offering a whisper into your ear. Striking just like a cat.

“Let’s dance.” Her voice was bolstered with an undercurrent of strength. Enchanting as the silvery moon that hung in the far sky.

She dragged you close and you joined the fray around you, immediately getting lost in the sea of bodies and the rhythm of the wooden instruments.

Her green eyes shimmered in the candlelight, accented by the golden hues of her mask and you found herself getting sucked in. Surely you must have encountered a widow before, with your prestige and all it would've been impossible not to. Yet you lacked the memory of going toe to toe with one like this. Not that you’d ever been allowed to keep many of your memories.

Her face was made up to perfection, and even without shadow and blush you’re sure she would still be flawless. She’s fixed her hair to let it flow freely down her back, a fiery red river lined with soft waves. Her dress was obsidian black, much the color of your own attire and it fit her as if it was made just for her.

You understood the reputation of her program now. How only the best were permitted to live. She was pretty, beyond so, but she was also incredibly skilled. It was all in the details, things anyone without extensive training would never pick up on. The way she moved, almost imperceptibly pushing the boundaries; trailing her fingers over your palm, leaning into the beat of the music, blushing when you did the same.

All seemingly natural, yet all oh so calculated. The two of you fell into an easy rhythm, properly dancing this time instead of being stuck stumbling around with that oaf of a man. An onlooker might have assumed the movements were practiced with the way you stepped and darted about, synchronized with beauty.

There was danger in the atmosphere too, a delicate truce hanging in the balance, silently acknowledged by both parties, yet held with little conviction. One wrong move or impulsive thought would leave one painting the carpet red with blood and the other slinking away without a batted eyelash.

The tension was drawn out in both of your gazes and in the way you held the other in your arms. Muscles taught, but with enough fluidity to glide around, to ride the sound waves of some long dead composer’s piece. Eyes guarded, yet laced with curiosity and intent. Intent to not back down, to see where this would go, and surprisingly, to savor the moment.

There would come a time, far too soon, where your paths would part and possibly never cross again. You didn’t want to dwell on that truth, so you don’t. Tonight, hidden among the dozens of partners crowding this grand hall in Russia, you could be whatever you wanted; and so could she. You could mold yourself into who you wanted to be, or perhaps more importantly, who the person in your arms wanted you to be. Behind the masks, inhibitions lowered by the drinks you’d both consumed, there was a hidden truth.

Both straying a little outside of what you’d been directed to to stay locked in the embrace of the other for a while longer. What your superiors didn’t know didn’t hurt them, you’d still be back on time.

It was far too easy to get lost in cadence, to get lost in her and for a second a tug of familiarity pulled at your chest. Not at the dance or at the mission, but at her. You thought you might’ve met before, that you’d known her more intimately and that that connection allowed you to follow her now. Perhaps that’s why something other than intense rivalry had slipped into her inspection of you earlier; why she looked at you with more than just the distance required to size up a possible adversary. You couldn’t identify it before and you certainly couldn’t now, but maybe you’d stumbled upon a reason, maybe this ran deeper than a simple derailing of your mission.

You moved to latch onto it, to delve into it and explore where it might lead, but it left as soon as you did, slipping from your grasp like leaves in the wind. The fleeting feeling left you to wonder if it had been true or not. The memory of downing multiple drinks throughout the course of the night filled your mind then. This confusion was all likely due to the effects of alcohol, poisoning your intellect and stirring odd emotions.

The warmth of a hand along your waist and the waft of a flowery perfume reminded you of who you were accompanied with at this time too snapped you out of your musings. This is exactly what she wanted, to distract you long enough to clear the man you’d been hunting earlier. The one you’d been sent to kill and the one she’d been sent to protect. He was far out of your reach now, likely holed up with an ally of hers. In a room where you were supposed to be, except instead of slicing his throat they were being subjected to his lust.

You’d chosen to play her game and she’d won, consequences would await you when you inevitably returned unsuccessful; something you weren’t looking forward to. She’d be spared tonight though, given an uncontested night for a mission success. Your suffering for hers, that’s just how the game worked.

You still had a few minutes until extraction, and you intended on making the most of your temporary freedom. The music wasn’t unsatisfying as you kept up to its steady tempo, stepping in time and place to the beat. She seemed to sense your admittance of defeat, how you weren’t going to attack her so in turn she relaxed a fraction, her grip on your hand easing up.

Your figures molded together quite nicely, predicting the rise and fall of the other’s motions with supernatural grace. Remaining close, yet never in range of stepping on the other’s feet. Keeping distance, yet never straying out of the other’s warmth. It was as if you knew her precise style of action, the personal tells and quirks that only revealed themselves with time. Seeing as she matched your flow with even ease, you might’ve guessed she knew yours too. It was impossible though, you would remember, and she was tricky.

Even your clothes harmonized shades of deep, rich black, the only difference being the gold on her mask and the silver on yours. You were parallels, destined to be on opposite sides, but somehow catching brief moments of solace.

The whole quartet crescendoed in tandem and you dipped her down, once again remaining frozen in a world all of your own. You were suddenly acutely aware of how close your lips were, not that they hadn’t been for the past few minutes. This was different, filling you with that restless pull of familiarity again. Not with you standing there, holding her in your arms as a close to an orchestral arrangement. Just, the apprehension that rose before a kiss. The apprehension that rose before a kiss with her.

Shaking it off again as you lifted her back into an upright position, the chatter of mindless conversation filled your ears once again as the music ended. It was abrasive, like a harsh sunlight after a dark winter, it was the first sign of the end. Her eyes had changed too, like all of what you felt was being reflected in her irises, as if she was aware of the shift too.

She stood apart from you once again like enemies instead of partners, reality crashing untimely down upon its victims. The beats passed in silence now, each one returning that same pressure to each of your shoulders.

Not sure what to think, you settled for placing a kiss on her hand, as any gentleman would after a dance such as this one. This is where you would part, and already you could see her walls sliding back into place, becoming what they wanted. Your mask went back on too, firmly plated over your features to protect yourself once again. The small moment of truth shared outside of the mental barriers, but behind physical ones vanished into the night; like the extinguishing of a flame atop a candle.

You’d had your chance to burn brighter than you’d ever reached before. The heat lingered in a pink flush tinting your cheeks. But it was fading fast, blending back into the original shade of skin.

You turned your back on her to exit the building. Making it only a step away you felt a hand keeping you back for the second time that night. Only this time it felt different. The first time it wasn’t your choice whether to stay or not, her clench was vice like, controlled, for them. Now she was giving you a choice, a soft squeeze, this would be for her and for you only.

Of course you turned, and the look in her eyes made you falter. There was a deeply apologetic message there, although you have no clue as to what for. One thing you did know though is that you’ve seen it before. It’s rooted solid in your mind, that distraught expression. You couldn’t push away that sense of knowing anymore.

You blinked once, slower than a regular gesture, an easy signal. It’s alright. Here you were, leaping into the abyss with no idea of where you may fall; no idea if it was even real. You just had to make sure that she would find some peace in your departure.

A sad smile was the last you saw of her before she disappeared, quickly getting lost in the crowded room. She had to go back to her faction, as you had to go back to yours. That was just how your worlds worked. There was never any room for questioning that truth, choices weren’t something you were privy to.

Tonight had been too far, you found the line, stepped over it, and then ran way past it. They’d make sure to snap out back into place for failing such an easy mission, whether they knew the reason or not.

As you made your way out of the building and down a few blocks to a car waiting to drive you back all you could think about was her. Your mind was no longer clouded with the directive, nor the fear of getting it twisted all over again upon your return. No, tonight you had been whatever you wanted, hidden beneath a mask, enthralled in a game of pretend.

There was a high chance you wouldn’t remember the events that just took place in the morning, but that didn’t much matter. She had begged you to entertain a fantasy and you lacked the conviction to deny her the comfort, no matter how limited or how false. Perhaps there had been a history there, where tonight’s escapade would topple onto the pile of forcefully forgotten moments; lingering only in a faint haze of intimacy.

The night was pitch black around you as you slid into the backseat of the four door that waited in the lot. The silence seemed to suck all energy from within the vehicle, leaving its occupants to face off in a tense stalemate. One carried the weight of failure and the knowledge of consequence, the other a shark, smelling the shame in the water and hungering for blood.

The former carried something else though too, something much lighter and fantastic. Ideas of freedom associated with emerald greens and fiery reds and ebony blacks. And you’d happily take those feelings with you to the grave.

baby it���s Halloween,

and we can be anything

[starboywille]

a continuation of this post, aka autistic himbo wille my utter beloved - also Wille in this au uses neopronouns! If you want an in-depth explanation of which pronouns they use you can look at Kai’s @purplehoodiesimon post here

Wille’s room in the Eriksson’s household is a visual representation of who they are, posters and pictures and pride flags hanging on every surface inch. A bed covered in stuffed animals and a nest of blankets bought by sol’s friends and Simon. It’s all soft lights from the glow-in-the-dark planets and stars that litter the ceiling and LEDs strung on the walls.

Space and stars are prevalent in the entire room, Linda having wanted to make sure moon’s room truly reflected who they were as a person, and not just the manufactured son Kristina had so carefully put together. And Wille loves space. They know every fact and tidbit about the universe and will tell anyone who will listen everything. They’ve told Simon every fact, Sara every thought, Linda every article they’ve ever read on the subject.

Sports posters also line the walls, the other facet of moon’s life on display as well. Athletes from all genres, stickers graciously added by Simon covering the corners and the empty spaces around the figures. Because according to Simon having sweaty men and Polaroids of the two of them kissing on sol’s walls didn’t signal that Wille was gay enough. Moon loved every addition.

It’s so drastic, Wille’s room at the Eriksson’s, from their room at their mother’s home. There it was all white walls, made beds and blank faces. When Simon slept over for the first time in eighth grade he called it a hospital room and Wille agreed. There, Wille was the proper son who didn’t have trouble understanding people, the boy his mother expected him to be and not the one who’d get overwhelmed with noises and crowds. There, Wille was Wilhelm, the boy who’s good at sports and nothing else. It was miserable.

So when Linda offered to let Wille stay at her home, to live with her and her family, Wille took the opportunity and ran. Sol basically loved there anyways, always somewhere in Simon’s room whenever Erik would FaceTime them, no matter the time he would call. And Linda doesn’t care that Wille and Simon are together, she just wanted to take them in, wanted to provide Wille with actual love and nurture, not just a dinner every couple of days and stilted conversations.

So Wille’s room is their happy space; a visual representation of the life they now have, surrounded by the people who care for star. Able to flourish and be themselves.

[quillfeather21]

Pro-Heroes Headcanons

(Because they’re all complete disasters)

1) Hawks is the one that randomly crashes on everyone’s couches. They’re starting to think he has a schedule he follows that just says “who’s life am I going to invade today?”

2) they all have a group chat that Mirko made and she has Endeavor’s nickname set to “Endevowo” and he HATES it but can’t figure out how to change it. (No one is telling him and they have a bet to see how long it’ll take before his daughter takes pity on him)

3) Best Jeanist is the dad friend and whenever they get together he’s usually the designated driver for the rest of them.

4) Edgeshot has multiple fan accounts that document his chivalrous acts to the general population. These acts include, but are not limited to: posing for pictures, helping old people cross the street, helping cats out of trees, replacing children’s ice cream, giving out autographs, and letting children try on his scarf.

5) Endeavor, Kamui Woods, and Best Jeanist have a vow to keep Mt. Lady, Mirko, and Hawks apart at ALL COST. The chaos would be too much for the old men ( Enji and Jeanist) and the old man at heart (Kamui) to take.

6) Best Jeanist has a hairless cat named Cashmere and he LOVES that cat. He dresses her up in sweaters and has an Instagram account dedicated to her. His fans find it endearing that he loves his pet so much. Say something bad about Cashmere? Get ready to throw hands because Best Jeanist protects his baby.

7) Ryuku has a pet bearded dragon she named “Akuma” despite his name, Akuma is a sweetheart and will often be found on her shoulder when she is doing office work.

8) Mirko throws Hawks a birthday party every year and gets all the other pros (including her Underground Hero and Vigilante buddies) involved. Past years have included capture the flag with Tokyo as their playground and paintball. Aizawa got drug along by Hizashi and proceeded to get sniped in paintball by a cackling Mirko and Hawks. He had pink paint in his hair for a week.

9) On Holidays, the pros all get together to read their fan mail and open the gifts together. Mirko films it a lot and she will never forget the time that Edgeshot got a pink thong sent to him in the mail. His disgusted and puzzled face will live on in her camera for years to come.

Edgeshot: *holds up the pink thong* (quietly whispers, barely able to be heard) what the fuck?

Midnight: *cackling like a witch*

Edgeshot: oh god I hope they haven’t been worn-

Midnight: *more hysterical cackling*

10) One time, a fan got too obsessed and followed Hawks home. He called Best Jeanist because this woman was screaming in front of his apartment that she was going to marry him. Best Jeanist snuck in through the balcony and stayed with him in case the woman tried to break in. It was that moment that Best Jeanist had the realization “oh yeah. Hawks is only TWENTY THREE”. Hawks was scared to be alone for a month because of this woman. She went away one day and he has no idea why or how.

11) Ryuuku, Mirko, Midnight, and the other female pros have a get together once a month at a spa to catch up and bitch about how stupid their male colleagues can be.

Mirko: seriously! This bitch forgot his fucking phone, got caught in a fence, and somehow lost his shoe in a span of an HOUR!

Ryuuku, Ragdoll, and Midnight: hhmmm.

The rest: *concerned nodding*

12) Endeavor’s receptionist has an office cat named Brutus. It has three legs and maybe 1 brain cell but it doesn’t effect his receptionist’s productivity so he just lets it stay. Brutus, to Enji’s dismay, LOVES Enji and this man cannot get the damn thing to leave him alone. He’s not a cat person, he’s not an ANIMAL person. But Brutus loves him and the receptionist would cry if he made him get rid of Brutus.

So Brutus stays.

13) Fatgum invites everyone to his agency for a Christmas meal every year. Hawks always ends up spiking the punch but it’s fun to see a drunk Kamui Woods trying to corral a even drunker Mt. Lady into their car so it’s worth it.

Drunk Mt. Lady: RYU!! I HAVE YOUR SHOES!!!!! (Holds up pair of slip on flats)

Drunk Ruyku, waving a pair of heels: I HAVE YOURS!!!

(They switched shoes somewhere during the night)

14) During Pride Month, the pros often place their flags somewhere on their official hero outfits so their fans know that they have someone like them to look up to. The media went wild when a group of about twenty pros were at the Pride Parade with their flags draped over their shoulders.

15) they all troll the media and it’s hilarious. They’ve all sought to make the reporter’s lives living hell and it’s hilarious.

Some random ass reporter: Edgeshot-san!! Is it true that you’re asexual?! Following your recent updates on Instagram-

Edgeshot, just trying to enjoy his day: I’m not asexual. I’m Japanese.

16) Are kind of divided into the “older pros” (the older ones who have done it for a while) and the “younger pros” (the ones who are just starting out or are under the age of 35). They’re all a really tight-knit community though and if you mess with one of them you get all of them.

17) They all kind of shunned Endeavor for a while when the shit with his family came to light, but Hawks is the one who made them realize that he was trying to change for the better.

18) you don’t mess with kids. At all. ESPECIALLY with Hawks or Edgeshot. They are the protective big brothers of the pro-hero network and they WILL punt anyone who hurts a child on their watch to the sun. No questions asked.

19) People are surprised to see how much “fight me” energy Mirko actually has. Her and Hawks have a tradition where they just beat the shit out of each other whenever they see each other after a long time.

[simpingforsoftboys]

Too Little Too Late

ft. IwaOi

G/N reader

TW: Neglect, manipulation, toxicity in general, swearing

Read this first

tysm for the request anon! It’s about time Y/n stood up for themselves don’t you think? That’s the thing about relationships like these. It’s so hard to get out of them once you’re in deep- even if you can see every single red flag clear as day.

Also I’ve decided that since these are lengthy- there will be separate parts for Kuroken, SakuAtsu, and OsaSuna in the future.

 This one is something I actually turned into a two shot: part one and part two. So same plot line, just goes more in depth on the “break up” part.

This was it, you were finally going to do it. After two decades of following your soon to be ex boyfriends around, it was time for you to step out of their shadow- into the limelight of independency. Still, you felt like a coward- leaving them while neither were even in the country. It was petty perhaps, but deep down within your heart- the vindictive, evil, and cruel part of you whispered that this was what they deserved. You were nearly finished packing- two suitcases stuffed to the max with your clothing and any small, expensive purchase you bought for yourself. Now all you needed to do was shove anything else that could fit into your duffel bag. 

This wasn’t a new idea. Leaving them that is. In fact, you’d been thinking about it for years already. Honestly, you doubted you’d have even begun noticing just how unbalanced your current dynamic with your two “lovers” was, until a stranger- turned friend had pointed it out. 

His name had been Miya Atsumu- he had gone to Tokyo University just like you and was the starting setter for their volleyball team. He was flirty at first, acting like a stereotypical frat boy. Despite telling him you had not one- but two partners- he hadn’t left you alone at that fateful party. 

“Wait... yer datin’ that newbie setter from Argentina? AND Iwaizumi... the one who’s boutta transfer over to that American university?” Atsumu questioned incredulously, nearly doing a spit take, he leans over your figure and places his red solo cup down on the counter behind you. 

“Yeah... I know it’s not a normal relationship-” You begin, already used to defending you and your lovers. 

“Nah, that’s not what I’m sayin’ darlin.” The blonde replies, his words make him seem as though he’s hitting on you but somehow there’s an undertone of genuine concern. “Neither of em have even spared ya a glance since ya got here! Seems like they’re the ones in love- not the three of ya.”

You had frowned at his words, shaking them off easily. The three of you were in love, besides, no stranger could have deduced that at first glance- if anything he was just trying to meddle in your happy relationship... so why did his words continue to plague you that night, and for many nights after that? 

Looking back on it now, you should have listened to Atsumu sooner. 

You had countless discussions with Hajime and Toru after the night of the party. They had seemed genuinely sorry and made an effort to be more inclusive. However, they slowly fell back into old habits- time and time again- as if they had forgotten the promises they had made. 

There would be no more discussions, no more nights staying up, waiting for them to come back home from their date. 

There would be no more of the three of you- just Hajime and Toru. 

That thought prevented you from picking up the framed photo on your bedside- the one of you three. It had been taken at a children’s festival that the three of you had taken Takeru too. It was probably the last photo where you had been so blinded by your love for them that you completely glossed over the fact that the only people they were looking at were each other. 

“Y/n... what are you doing?” A raspy voice called from the bedroom’s doorway, startling you from your memories. Body shaking, you turned around to face the owner of the voice. “We came home early to surprise you... only to find you packing your bags?” 

The same two people that you didn’t want to see stood before you. Both toted suitcases and smelt like the airport. You couldn’t find it within yourself to look them in the eyes, fearing that if you did you’d lose your strength, turn around, and begin unpacking.

“Y/n... prince(ss), what’s going on? Talk to us.” Toru whispered, speaking to you as if you were a cornered animal. That analogy wasn’t wrong per say but it did nothing to help you calm your nerves. 

You knew it shouldn’t have but for some reason his tone had made your heart skip a beat.

“Yeah babe, let’s put the bags down and take a seat... we can talk about this right after me and Toru shower.” Hajime agreed, his poor choice of words stirring anger within your soul- intense and smoldering like Zeus’s lightning bolts.

“No!” You cry, tears of pent up anger, hurt, and every other negative repressed emotion, begins to well up in your eyes. “I’m going to say this one last time- then I’m going to leave. We won’t talk. I’m not going to... to wait until you finish showering. I’m sick and tired of this- this absolute fucking BULLSHIT!” 

They stare at you wide eyed, not quite knowing how to respond. You don’t even give them the chance to think about how to do so- instead you opt to continue your rant. 

“I love you two so damn much. So, so much- to the point that it hurts me.” Your gaze flickered between the two of them. “Loving you... it breaks my heart. I can’t do it anymore Toru, Hajime. I wanted too- God knows I do. But I can’t keep doing this-”

Toru lets his carry on drop to the floor and races over, attempting to embrace you in a hug. Every bone, every fiber, literally every part of you is begging you to stay trapped in his arms. He’s warm and he’s here. It’s all you’ve ever wanted. 

Too little too late.

You shove him off, biting back sobs. Hajime hurries behind him, catching the taller male as he falls. 

“Y/n calm down what’s going on? What did we do?” Olive green eyes flit over to meet yours, they’re just as lovely as they have always been. But you notice that they’re also cold, like jade bracelets and old watered down matcha tea. 

“It’s what you didn’t do Haji.” You say and they can see the heart ache on your face. “I love you but you don’t love me- not as much as I love you at least.” Both of them look like they want to argue but you shake your head- effectively silencing them. The picture on the night stand stares back at you tauntingly- ignorance was indeed bliss it seems. Grasping it lightly you place it on the ground and kicked it gently, letting it slide over to where Toru and Hajime are still seated on the ground. The brunette takes it in his hands and examines it. 

“This was when we took Takeru to the children’s festival!” 

“Yeah... we were so happy then... where did that go wrong Y/n? When did you stop smiling like this?” Hajime whispers. 

“I stopped smiling like that when I realized the truth- about us.” They watch as you take a deep breath, composing yourself. “It took me a long while, but I’ve been coming to terms with it.” A choked gasp escapes your lips, leading you to quickly spill the rest of your well kept insecurities. “This... this thing we have going on- it’s a toxic, endless cycle. There’s no us- it’s just Hajime and Toru plus Y/n.”

Toru’s expression morphs from empathetic to down right murderous. He’s offended that you would dare imply something like that. Deep down, you’re sure he knows you’re actually right, and he’s just acting like that to save his pride. A pang of shame hits you- when had you begun thinking mean thoughts like that?

“How could you say that?” He spits, tone devoid of sweetness, now replaced with lethal venom. “Everything we do is for you. We give you money, this nice home, space, time- our love. And you have the fucking gall to say we’re ostracizing you from our relationship? What the hell are you thinking Y/n?” 

You’ve never seen him this angry- not in all the years you’ve known the setter. It sorta terrifies you. Hajime doesn’t bother to reprimand Toru for his tone like usual, instead he looks like he agrees with him. 

“He’s right Y/n, everything we do is for you. Are you mad because we didn’t take you to a wedding? Guess what- that’s just business. Stop being so damn jealous for no reason. You can’t be selfish in our sort of relationship. Didn’t you know that in the first place?” 

They don’t- won’t see things from your point of view. Honestly, what were you even expecting.

“When have I EVER been selfish? I cook, clean, and practically orbit around the two of you. I’m not mad just because of a FUCKING WEDDING! I’m upset- and hurt because you can’t ever see from my eyes. Don’t think I haven’t seen the differences between the looks you give me verses each other. The date nights you forget to include me in- the stolen kisses in the morning you give each other without even thinking about me. Even when I try to initiate something I’m ‘too clingy’ or you’re ‘too busy.’ FUCK THAT. I deserve better. So I think I deserve to be selfish just this once- because this is something I need to do for me. Not for you.” 

They’re stunned, unable to speak. So they say nothing at all, watching you zip up your duffel bag and single handedly take all your baggage out into the living room by yourself. Neither of them say anything when there’s a knock on the door and they can hear your best friend enter their home and help you take your stuff down to their car. 

There’s nothing they can do. So they go to bed without showering, thinking about the things you said and reflecting. You made it quite clear to them. It’s over- the three of you.

[caffeinated-cryptid]

ashes, ashes.

10.8k | AO3 link | tags/tws: intrulogical, serial killer/deity of death au, lots of death (murder, mentions of a previous suicide attempt, and brief descriptions of animal death), injury, violence, swearing, morally grey characters, crime.

““You’re not supposed to be able to see me.” Logan blurted out with a start, eyes wide and looking at Remus like he had just killed a guy in front of him. Oh wait-

“Mamma always told me I was special.” Remus replied with a woozy grin, leaving back against the cool bricks of the alleyway. Seeing things that weren’t there was a new level of fucked-up for his brain, but hopefully that was just a side effect of hitting his head and not something he’d have to take pills for later. Either way, at least this spectre was pretty to look at. Trauma had its benefits.

“You think a deity of death is pretty?” Logan asked wryly, cutting through the stream of subconscious babble he’d accidentally spilled into the frigid night air. “I’d be flattered, if that didn’t sound like such a red flag.””

(aka: remus chases death like it's his favourite pastime, since it means he gets to see logan again. understandably, logan has some objections to this.)

--------------

Case 1: the man in the alley.

The first time Remus and Logan met, it was more or less a complete accident.

As a part-time warehouse operative slash freelance artist, Remus had a lot of free time between jobs, and one of the things he enjoyed doing most while waiting for his next gig to come around was spray-painting obscene images into the side of alleys. 

His latest project was a 7-foot tall purple unicorn with generous proportions. Pretty tasteful by his standards, all things considered.

If nothing else, the piece of work would give passers-by a topic of conversation, and that was always something Remus aimed to inspire with his art. These topics, however, often happened to be the ‘why’ variety. Most commonly, the old classic (and his personal favourite): ‘why are you like this?’.

Regrettably, the evening passed pretty quickly with no curious pedestrians passing by his alley and starting up such a conversation. By the time Remus finished, it was past midnight and by now the only people around were the regular nightlife-- primarily the local college kids who had recently come home and were enjoying their break from classes, and adults like himself who were trying to chase away their loneliness with some other kind of high.

...Woo, and that’s enough depressing thoughts for tonight. Remus declared to himself. After all, he had a new piece to admire! Stepping back, he spent a moment taking in the completed artwork by the light of his phone’s torch before deciding it was as perfect as it could get. He’d come back later and get a picture during the daytime to show off to his friends, so for now he begun preparing to leave by packing his paint cans into his backpack.

It was when he had collected the last can of magenta from the ground that he felt something grab the back of his coat hood. Remus had no time to process the fact that someone had snuck into the alleyway before he was shoved against the same wall he'd painted his mural on, coming face-to-face with a hooded man waving a rather pathetic-looking pocket knife at him.

“Give me your money. Now.” The man demanded.

Remus blinked in delayed surprise. Usually he was the one being the creep in the alleyway. He had never expected to come across an actual creep. Heck, this situation felt like it was pulled straight out of an old PSA with how stereotypical it was.

“What?” He blurted out unthinkingly, because of that exact train of thought. 

“You heard me! I want you to get your wallet and hand over everything you’ve got.”

What an unfortunate victim this man has chosen.

“You think I have any money to my name? I’m practically the starving artist every parent warns their kid about becoming.” Remus said with a huff of amusement.

“Don’t try to bullshit me!” The hand clutching the front of his coat tugged him forward before violently slamming him back against the bricks. The back of Remus’ head ricochetted off them roughly with the sudden movement, and the small grin he had been wearing quickly faded with flash of pain and the realization he may actually be in trouble.

“I saw the paint you’ve got in your bag,” The man continued over his dawning concern. “Somebody who’s broke wouldn’t have all that.”

Remus’ thoughts halted for a second. His bag…! He knew the paint can he was holding onto for dear life wouldn’t do much in the way of self-defense given that it was practically empty, but a whole bag of them? Hitting this guy with that much weight would make him think twice about trying to stab him, at least.

“Okay, okay. You got me, I’m rich as hell. Just let me get it, alright? My wallet's in there.”

The man gave him a skeptical look, but stepped back slightly, continuing to hold the weapon in his direction. “I know how to throw knives. Try to run and you’ll have a hole in your back quicker than an onset stroke.”

Yikes, and Remus thought he was bad at metaphors. He didn’t even need Virgil here to tell him that that made no sense. Still, he grinned placatingly. “Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye: I won’t run.”

Finally, bad-metaphor guy let down his guard and allowed Remus to side-step around him. He walked a few paces towards where he dropped his backpack in his initial shock, putting the magenta spray in before he picked it up by the straps. True to his word, he didn't run; instead he swung around on his heel, slamming the full force of his hardback sketchbooks and cans of spray paint into the face of the hooded man.

He instantly dropped his knife, falling backwards and clutching his nose as blood erupted from it. Under the low-lighting of the street lamp, Remus was transfixed for a second, feeling like he was in one of those gritty r-rated movies he watched with his babysitter as a kid. The moment was ruined when he realized that 1) the man was approaching again very quickly, and 2) he couldn’t get the momentum quick enough to swing his bag around and hit him a second time.

Before he knew it, Remus had accidentally let go of the makeshift weapon when he was tackled to the ground, wind completely knocked out of him as the two of them collided against cobblestone moistened with rain.

“You fucking bastard.” The guy hissed furiously. His voice was nasally now that his nose was crooked and broken-looking, and Remus almost wanted to poke fun of him for it until he felt two hands wrap around his throat and start to choke him. “‘Could’ve just made things easy, but now you’re gonna die with all the other trash.”

Why? Remus wanted to ask. Over the 7 dollars and 15 cents he had?

But as he tried to tear away the vice grip on his neck, he couldn’t find the voice to talk back, even though the seriousness of the situation was hitting him like a freight train. Maybe it was his own fault for escalating things instead of playing along. Go figure, he had overestimated his own abilities after years being the off-putting one; the person others thought they had to watch over their shoulder for. Either that, or maybe it was the fact that his wallet carried more sentimental value with it than monetary. It was small and made of orange ducktape, but it carried so many things that Remus wanted to protect; a photo of his family, one of Virgil's guitar picks, the ticket to the last Tenacious D he went to, and of course, the receipt for his first condom purchase.

His mind flashed to his friends and family, and he wondered how they’d feel about this; him dying because of some dumb robber in a dumb alleyway because he was painting his dumb artwork. That was hardly the kind of death one could look back on and regard with pride (Hell if it wasn't funny to imagine how everyone will react to the news, though). But as he focused on the face above him, he realized with some panic that the grip wasn’t loosening, even as he could feel his lungs burn and a near-soothing feeling telling him to just let go.

As a final act of desperation to save himself from becoming a wholly embarrassing funeral eulogy instead of having a rockstar’s death in his 40s like he always imagined for himself, he patted the ground frantically, looking for a loose rock or something to stop this with. That’s when he felt it; the slightly warm plastic handle of the knife the guy had been holding. Remus’ heart pounded as he realized what he needed to do, and he barely even considered the repercussions of the action before he was plunging the knife into the side of the guy’s neck.

Finally, the grip around his throat loosened as the guy gasped, his expression flickering back and forth between anger and shock. Remus ripped the knife away, inhaling air greedily when the sudden action caused the man to loosen his grip and move off of him, trying to cover the stab wound with his hands and failing.

Remus quickly scrambled back and pulled himself up the wall, watching and waiting for the guy to fall still. He did, after what felt like a few minutes, and Remus didn’t know whether to cry or laugh. He’d just killed a man. It was self-defence, but still… even the morbid thoughts he had over the years couldn't have prepared him for what it would have actually felt like to go through with any of it.

In that moment of pause, his injuries caught up with him as both his head and neck begun to ache. He was so disoriented that he barely even noticed the third person standing in the alley until they spoke up.

“Well. I didn’t see that coming.”

Remus snapped his head towards the source of the voice, and immediately regretted it when the hasty motion made him dizzy. The only reason he didn’t immediately jump into fight mode was because of the unusually casual way the voice had spoken. Beyond that, the figure he saw standing a short distance away didn’t really… look like a regular person. Beyond the odd formal clothing that had no discernable modern style to it and the shock of white hair that could only be achieved with hella bleach, his skin was a cool grey like a cadaver and he had a ghostly appearance to him; transparent and misty around the edges.

Definitely not the sort of thing Remus expected to see, but he was always one to accommodate the unexpected. 

“...You and me both. My only goal for today was to draw unicorn porn.” Remus replied lightly, once he decided it wouldn't hurt to entertain whatever was currently happening.

The figure turned, startling at the sight of Remus staring directly at him.

“You’re not supposed to be able to see me.” He blurted out with wide eyes, looking at Remus like he had just killed a guy in front of him. Oh wait-

“Mamma always told me I was special.” Remus replied with a woozy grin, leaving back against the cool bricks of the alleyway. Seeing things that weren’t there was a new level of fucked-up for his brain, but hopefully that was just a side effect of hitting his head and not something he’d have to take pills for later. Either way, at least this spectre was pretty to look at. Trauma had its benefits.

“You think a deity of death is pretty?” The man (deity???) asked wryly, cutting through the stream of subconscious babble he’d accidentally spilled into the frigid night air. “I’d be flattered, if that didn’t sound like such a red flag.”

"I can't believe my own brain is kinkshaming me." Remus whined, slipping down slightly as the worn-down soles of his boots lost their grip on the concrete for a second. 

Death frowned, until a metaphorical lightbulb lit over his head. "Ah- you think you're hallucinating. Well, that's not an unfair assumption. Keep believing it, by all means."

"That doesn't sound like something a hallucination would say." Remus pointed out.

"Well then, I'll gladly prove my non-existence by disappearing." Death said as he took a step towards the body.

"Wait!" Remus called before he could figure out why. The ghostly figure stopped, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. Remus’ composure slipped as his eyes darted between the body and Death. "I...I need to know that this is real. That I'm not making this up. This feels like something I'd dream, but…" 

His hand clenched around the knife, feeling the squelch of blood and the tremor of his hand. Despite the mixed signals he was currently getting on the state of his sanity, it felt solid and real, and Remus wasn’t sure what to make of that.

"Fuck. Please tell me! Am I being as messed up as usual or did I really just kill someone?"

Death’s eyes softened. "You did. This is real." 

"Well shit. Okay…" Remus looked back at the body with a deep resignation. He wondered if he should do something about that. Probably not; that would look even more incriminating.

"...If it makes you feel better, he has hurt people in situations like this before, and completely unnecessarily; his only motive was to achieve a rush.” 

That did make Remus feel better, actually. 

"Good. I’m glad I killed a piece of shit and not someone down on their luck." Remus sighed, eyeing the spectral figure. "Speaking of, if this is real, then I guess that means you are too right?"

Any sympathy on Death's place quickly faded as he was caught out. "Erm-"

"It's cool." Remus leaned his head back again. "Talking to a cute ghost man? Sounds like a typical Thursday night for me."

Actually, this was the furthest thing from a typical Thursday night for Remus, but he didn’t want to admit that to the cute ghost man and risk looking uncool.

"You shouldn't get acquainted with it. Seeing me is hardly a good thing." Death replied, though his cheeks were distinctly a darker grey. 

"Aww- don't sell yourself short. I love your work!" Remus waved away vaguely. He always had a strange relationship with death in a way that others didn’t; always the first to laugh at a funeral or smile instead of grieve. That was probably why he felt so comfortable right now. “Besides, we’ll all be food for the dirt and worms eventually, anyway. Why get uncomfortable with it?"

Death met his eyes again, seeming slightly more firm. “Perish those thoughts, it's hardly your time yet."

Remus pouted. "It's still inevitable, though. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy I didn’t die today and got to meet you instead, but what’s so bad about something that’s going to happen either way?”

“I’m starting to think I was right by judging your attitude as a red flag.” Death muttered.

“But I'm right aren't I?” Remus prodded.

“Indeed.” Death begrudgingly conceded. “And do you know just how inevitable it is? Approximately 2 people die per second; 106 per minute. There have been 6435 events of armed conflict in the past year alone, and over 690 million people who are undernourished as we speak. Beyond that, there are even more people losing their lives to case-by-case natural events and incidents. So if you’d be so kind, do not be so eager to create more work for me.”

Remus absorbed that information, tilting his head. “Despite all that, you’re still here?”

“...I am.” Death agreed after a heavy pause, in the same manner most would admit their own defeat. “I’ll admit, I’m not used to… talking so much. It’s an unusual feeling, but it’s been pleasant, I suppose.”

“Death likes my company.” Remus laughed. “That’s gotta be saying something.”

Death rolled his eyes. “My name is Logan, not Death.” 

“Huh. I’m Remus.” Remus replied, a little baffled. He didn’t expect a deity to have such a normal name.

“Remus ‘Tsukio’ Kaneshiro, I already know of you. We’ve met before.”

Remus’ bafflement only grew. “We have? I think I’d remember meeting someone like you.”

“You wouldn't; you were unconscious. It was after you overdosed on cold medicine. Thankfully your parents got you to the hospital on time before I could do my job, but I remember it being a close call.” Logan looked at him knowingly.

“...Oh.” Remus laughed nervously. He definitely remembered that. Finding out you could overdose on a lot of common household items was pretty dangerous for him to learn as a teenager, and he’d never forget how furious his entire family was with him for being so reckless. He never knew how to tell them that it wasn’t quite the accident they assumed it to be (needless to say, his adolescent years were pretty shitty to him, being the outsider in this town in more ways than one). Thankfully, the taste of cold medicine had become too repulsive for him to try anything like that again.

“...I am glad you’re alright. It’s always unfortunate when a life ends too soon.”

“Well…thanks. This has been pretty trippy, so I’m glad I met you too, Logan.”

Logan hummed and looked towards the end on the alleyway. “By the way, you should think about leaving soon. There’s a group of people approaching us.”

Shit, Remus had almost forgotten that he had just committed a crime. Given how awful this scene looked, there was a big chance he’d get thrown into jail for this if he got caught. But at the same time, he was almost hesitant to leave behind the spectre that had enchanted his heart within a few minutes, even if his mind was still trying to catch up with the overload of information.

“Why would you help me?” He asked quickly and somewhat suspiciously.

Just as Logan finished his business with the body, he looked at him over his shoulder with an almost sly expression. “You seem interesting, Remus. I’d hate for you to lose your life over someone so unworthy of one.”

And with that, Logan disappeared like a cloud of fog. Remus stood there transfixed, until he remembered Logan’s warnings and snatched up his bag, shoving the knife into his pocket and dashing into the night.

--------------

Case 2: the man who couldn't leave well enough alone.

The next time Remus and Logan met, it was slightly less of an accident, but fuck if the guy didn’t deserve it.

When Remus got home after the night he first saw Logan, he was more grateful than ever that he lived in such a run-down part of town. There were barely any security cameras to look out for, let alone people who were willing to be out during the early hours of the morning. 

He was able to slip into his apartment complex unseen, avoiding his early-bird roommate long enough to wash away his crimes in the shower.

After that, he fell into his bed, completely unable to process everything that had just happened. So instead he fell asleep and left the deep thinking to his future self.

As expected, he needed plenty of time to collect his thoughts. First of all, he knew he hadn’t hallucinated the whole thing because after weeks and months of taking it as easy as possible, he hadn’t seen anything else as strange as a personification of death named Logan. Logan...what kind of name even was that? It felt like the name of a teacher, not something that should be as grim and macabre as Remus himself. 

But that was the other thing; Remus couldn’t get the thought of Logan out of his head. He was like the angel who had come down to bless him in a moment of weakness, saving him from further misfortune. He knew he had little to no chance of seeing their deity again, but that didn’t stop him from plaguing his mind constantly. 

Remus figured the best chance he’d probably get at seeing Logan again was to become involved with death once more. His mind immediately jumped to animals, the easiest targets; he pictured slipping into a farm late at night and slitting the throat of one of the sheep, going to a pet store and buying a hamster for the night before ‘accidentally’ leaving it in a box to suffocate, picking up a stray from the street and snapping its neck quickly. But just as soon as those thoughts came to him, he waved them away with a grimace. He wouldn’t be able to go through with any of that, even for Logan.

People had always talked about him like he was a serial killer in training. They would keep a wary eye when he picked up sharp objects and ask his brother if Remus had ever hurt one of their pets as kids, as if because he had unconventional ideas, he was a complete sadist towards the innocent. (And yes, perhaps he did have thoughts of that nature too, but they’d always fill him with sickness because he fucking loved the pet dogs they had as kids, damn it). In any case, he knew that going through with those ideas would only be proving those people right, that he was a dangerous individual who’d murder an innocent creature just for someone his brain maybe made up.

...Perhaps he was losing his mind after all. What was he doing, plotting out the best way to see Death? If anyone else could hear his thoughts, they’d think him half-mad or suicidal. It seemed like the best thing so do was to try to push this out of his mind, so eventually, that's what he did. He wasn’t so good at that usually; his mouth ran a mile a minute and the people who knew him would often say that his brain-mouth filter was non-existent. But this felt like something he’d like to keep for himself, especially when news of the murder made it onto the local news, presumed to be the outcome of ‘gang activity’ simply because the victim was successful and had a loving family and what else could explain this?

He decided to not think about making plans anymore, and he only thought about Logan when his mind was otherwise unoccupied. It stayed that way until the very next week when he found out about the situation with his roommate’s ex.

Remus didn’t have many people in the world who were willing to put up with him, but the one’s that did, he cherished dearly. So when Nadia, the woman he’d describe as belonging among the Valkyries (if only she could get past her deal of not wanting to hurt a fly), came to him looking uncharacteristically shaken and upset, Remus felt something in him snap.

She told Remus about how her ex-boyfriend was following her to her workplace and making threats on her life. He’d even begun showing up outside their apartment late at night in an attempt at intimidation, and that detail alone pissed him off considering he’d been too in his head to even notice.

“All because I decided I deserved better.” Nadia told him tearily. She was so strong usually, both physically and emotionally, so seeing her so close to crying felt like a punch to the gut. “I just want for him to be gone… But James would probably kill me before I could even file a restraining order.”

“What if he was gone?” Remus blurted out. “Hypothetically.”

Nadia blinked at him, wiping a stray tear. “Honestly? I think the world would be a better place. But that’s never going to happen.”

Remus nodded. “Right. Of course. Do you still have his number, by any chance?”

--

Remus’ plan was simple: Nadia would call her ex and ask him to come over to ‘reconcile’, and when he did, Remus would confront him. Scare him enough to stay away for good. He was pretty great at being intimidating when he wanted to that the both of them assumed it would work out.

Well, James came as planned. Their apartment complex had one massive security flaw in that anyone could get in without keys or permission, so the only clue Remus got that James was coming was the sound of footsteps bouncing off the walls of the stairwell. Remus stood upright and waited, until he saw the top of James’ head slowly ascending up the stairs, pausing on the second-top step.

“You’ve got to be shitting me.” James scoffed disbelievingly as Remus moved in front of him. “Did Nadia seriously send out the guard dog? What? Suddenly too afraid to talk for herself?”

Remus considered barking at him in response, but considering how James was way above the common creep in terms of persistence, he crossed his arms instead and glared steadily.

“Hell yeah she did. You should know why, given how much of a low-life asshole you’ve been acting all week. When are you going to give up the big guy act, huh? Curley called and he wants his complex back.”

James, in all of his 5-foot-no-thoughts glory, only squinted as the insult went over his head.

“...I knew I never fuckin’ liked you. Don’t get involved in our relationship, you little freak.” James tried to pass him, and Remus quickly blocked him, taking out the knife he’d stolen months ago.

“Take another step and this is going in your goddamn eye.” Remus raised his voice, confident that most of their neighbours were already out at work. “You’re not going near Nadia ever again, do you hear me?”

“Or what?! What’ll you do, Kaneshiro? Stab me? Put the toothpick away and step aside, for god’s sake. This is embarrassing, even for you.”

The two of them stood in a standstill, staring each other down as the echo from James’ exclamation faded out.

“...Fine.” Remus said finally. He slipped the knife back into his pocket, and James smirked smugly until Remus grabbed the front of his shirt instead. “It’ll be more fun to do this, anyway.”

With that he shoved James backwards, who quickly lost his footing and fell down the long and narrow flight of stairs. He tumbled for few moments, hitting each step, until he landed on the ground floor with a distant thump.

Remus stared after him, preparing for James to get up and start making a scene like he always did when he didn’t get his way. He didn’t.

Frowning, Remus descended the stairs, and as he drew closer to the slumped-over body, he noticed the puddle of blood around James’ head and the odd way he’d landed.

“Damn.” Remus commented under his breath. “Nadia’s going to kill me.”

He heard a sigh somewhere ahead of him, and fearing someone had walked in on his compromising position, Remus quickly glanced up, excuse at the ready.

“It was an accident-!” He exclaimed, before he realized it was Logan standing there, looking between James and Remus with a pinched expression.

“I know you pushed him, Remus. That’s not exactly what the law would define as an ‘accident’.”

For a second, Remus was starstruck (and opting to ignore the consequences of his actions). “You remember me.”

“Of course I do. I didn’t expect to see you again so soon, though.”

That almost sounded like an accusation, so Remus held his hands up defensively. “Hey, in my defence he was just asking to die. The dude's a dick!”

Logan sighed. “Regardless, you shouldn't go around killing people. Sooner or later you’ll get caught.”

“Well, I’m 1 for 1 so far! But if you’d rather me not get in trouble… Have any tips on how to cover this?” Remus joked, winking.

Logan frowned at him before he truly considered it, looking around at the scene thoughtfully. “...Double check to make sure you left no evidence. Move quickly, before anybody stumbles across the scene. And if you have time, plant something which will make this look more like an accident-- for instance, a spill on the stairs.”

Remus’ eyes widened. “I wasn’t expecting actual tips. Holy shit- okay.”

He went over to check the body, feeling his cheeks heat up. He absolutely should not be getting flustered over advice on how to cover up a murder, yet here he was.

“I feel like you shouldn’t be encouraging this.” Remus said jokingly as he smoothed out the creases on the front of James’ shirt. “Didn’t you say something about having more work to do? Who knows, you might be giving me a new hobby.”

Remus laughed. Logan didn’t. When he glanced up, the deity was frowning.

“Perhaps not. Forget what I said; I shouldn’t be interfering in matters like this. I shouldn’t even be appearing to you now.”

“Woah, woah, woah. What’s the matter? I thought you liked talking.” Remus hastily stood upright, furrowing his eyebrows.

“I- regardless of my personal feelings, I have a job to do. I can’t allow myself to become so partial over one human.” Logan replied, rubbing at the crease between his eyebrows.

“Why? What’s the worst that could happen?!” Remus argued.

“You could cheat death, for starters.”

“You already know how I feel about that.” Remus whined. “I’ll off myself when the time comes, if it’ll make you feel better.”

“Don’t-” Logan exclaimed, before he reigned himself back in. “Just. No. You’re supposed to go naturally. Neither you or I should interfere with that.” 

Remus frowned. He wasn’t so sure he liked the thought of such a boring death. If anything, he wanted to go out in a blaze of glory. Otherwise, he’d be just another body no one would remember-- like loverboy over there.

“That means no more meetings like this.” Logan continued on.

“But what if I want to see you again?” Remus muttered. He looked across the room to Logan and found him wearing a similar downtrodden expression, until it grew serious.

“You’ll just have to deal with that, because we were never supposed to meet in the first place. I have a duty to fulfil and you have a life to live. Our paths are as parallel as can be.”

“This is bullshit, Logan.” Remus said, but he didn’t argue any further. Not when Logan walked around him to complete his business. Not when he prepared to leave, either.

“Don’t do this again.” Logan said finally, giving him a stern glare. “I mean it.”

--------------

Case 3: the woman in the streets.

The next time Remus and Logan met, Logan was starting to think Remus was making a habit of this after all.

In Remus’ defence, he totally wasn’t.

Logan’s parting words just wouldn’t leave his head. It was even worse than last time; the knowledge that he could kill anyone and get to see Logan again plagued him, and he found himself pulling away from his family and friends after the questioning from the police was over and done with.

They were all worried for him, but especially Nadia who knew exactly what he did and assumed it was because of the guilt that he was becoming uncharacteristically withdrawn. Although she was shocked at how things had escalated, she tried to apologize multiple times for letting Remus confront James, which he would always blow off. It wasn’t killing James that had gotten to him, not at all; in fact he was glad that prick was out of their hair. Rather, he grappled with the idea of never seeing Logan again, one of the few people who truly saw the worst sides of him and accepted them nonetheless.

He didn’t deal with it well. 

The night of their next meeting, Remus was out drinking alone. It wasn’t something he was proud of, but he didn’t want to justify why he wanted to get absolutely wasted to his friends, so being sad and lonely for one night it was. 

He had stumbled out of the bar late at night, beginning his unsteady trek home since he had accidentally spent too much money and couldn’t afford an uber to drive him back. Stepping onto the street a couple blocks from his apartment, everything was quiet until the person ahead of him crossed the road, just as a car sped around the corner and knocked them over with an awful crunch.

Remus stood in shock. He looked after the swerving car to get the licence plate, but it was already too late and they had hit the gas upon noticing him. Swearing, he stumbled over to the person left in the road. 

“Shit- Are you alright? Of course not, you need an ambulance.” He was struggling to unlock his phone when he noticed how still the person-- a frail old woman-- was. It didn’t even look like she was taking breaths, though it was hard to tell through his swimming vision and the thick coat she was wearing.

With unsteady fingers, Remus pressed against the pulsepoint on her neck, and felt the moment her heartbeat stopped.

“Oh…”

And then he turned on his heel and threw up.

Death wasn’t supposed to bother him like this. He had always been proud of his ability to frighten others with his dismissive attitude towards life’s eventualities. But this was different. He had just watched the murder of a complete stranger right before his eyes, and there wasn't even anything he could do. What the fuck?

He didn’t even feel better when the person he’d been longing to see all night appeared right in front of him, arms crossed and ready to give a lecture.

“Again, Remus?! What did I tell you?! No more murder!” Logan threw his hands up at the sight of Remus next to the body, that was until he noticed the cause of death and Remus’ sickly appearance,

“I-I didn’t do anything this time, I swear. Logan I promised myself I wouldn’t.” He picked himself out of the gutter he had been puking into, trying to look at the deity, just so he could feel some sense of reassurance. “I thought I’d never see you again. ‘Thought I was okay with that, but I’m not. I missed you.”

Logan only stared at Remus when he began crying. He was a sappy emotional drunk when he got through the fun tipsy phase, sue him.

“...I apologize for yelling at you.” Logan said, awkwardly hovering his hand over Remus’ shoulder until it shuddered with a sob and accidentally brushed against him. Remus jolted at the cool touch, as did Logan, who quickly retreated his hand, eyes darting around worriedly.

“‘Always thought you’d be like mist.” Remus slurred, awestruck enough to forget his sadness. He reached forward to prod at Logan, who furrowed his eyebrows thoughtfully.

“I… Yes, that’s definitely strange.” Logan cleared his throat and straightened up. “In any case, you need to get off the street, report this incident, and go home. Being around so much death isn’t good for your mental health.”

“Maybe.” Remus sighed. “I quite like hanging around you, though.”

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re drunk. You’re going to feel a lot worse about seeing me in the morning, I promise.”

“I never feel bad about seeing you.” Remus said, picking up his phone from where he’d dropped it. “I only feel bad that it’ll be a long time before I get the chance to see you again.”

“...I don’t get it.” Logan replied softly after a heavy pause. “You shouldn’t want to see me at all. I’m a bad omen. You’d only ever get to meet me in times of tragedy.”

“‘Bad omen’... And I thought Emo was dramatic.” Remus chuckled weakly. “You’re not so bad, Lo. You guide people to the end. You care for them even when you have so many people to watch over. You’re opinionated and you’re easily curious when things don’t go to plan. You don’t mind when I’m weird and you’re fun to talk to. I like you.”

Logan blinked rapidly with surprise, clutching his chest. “I wish we could be having this conversation away from the recently deceased. But... I suppose I feel the same way. I still don’t know how or why you can see me, but our conversations haven’t been unpleasant.”

“Death likes my company.” Remus said, smiling softly to himself. “...You’re right though. I should probably phone this in. I just wish I could remember the licence plate… Something like XQ... ugh.”

“XQR 460.” Logan supplied helpfully. 

“That’s it!” Remus cheered, sloppily kissing Logan on the cheek. “Thanks babe!”

Logan floundered for a second as Remus begun calling an ambulance, struggling to regain composure. “I hope we don’t meet like this again soon. Three times over the span of a year is already too much.”

“I don’t know.” Remus looked at Logan slyly. “I’ve always had pretty bad luck.”

--------------

Case 4: the bad doctor.

The next time Remus and Logan meet, it’s completely coincidental and under less stressful circumstances for once.

Well, still stressful. Just for different reasons. 

Roman was in the hospital because of some dumb motorcycle crash he got into, which near-gave Remus a heart attack when he heard about because he may often ask for death these days, but not like this. Never like this.

Anyway, he was more or less alive in the end. Just a broken leg and a lot of scrapes and bruises since he always refused to wear the proper protective clothing when he went riding (due to it ‘not fitting his aesthetic', apparently. Remus assumed it was pussy talk for ‘I don’t look badass enough to pull off leather’).

Remus had stopped by to visit, bringing some of the fancy name-brand crackers Roman liked since he kept complaining about how stale and awful the hospital’s ones were, and to say hello to Virgil while xe was on shift. The three of them even managed to sit down while Virgil was on break and catch up, too. Roman and Virgil seemed glad Remus was doing a bit better after his downward spiral a couple of weeks ago, even if they didn’t mention it.

After a few hours spent catching up and teasing one another, he decided to leave Roman to get some rest. His plans for that evening were to take a load off and perhaps call for some takeout with Nadia. Honest to God, he didn’t plan on looking for any trouble.

But still, trouble found him when he noticed Logan walking the halls of the hospital, following a doctor to the elevator.

Remus double-taked. Though he shouldn’t really be surprised to see Logan here in a place with so much death, it was still odd witnessing the cloaked figure walk around normal people, none of them noticing his presence. 

Remus quickly jogged over. "Logan!" He hissed under his breath.

The deity startled (startled!) before turning to him, just like the doctor he was following. 

"Do you need something?" The doctor said, raising an eyebrow.

"Uhhhh, nope! Just… getting into the elevator." Remus replied, stepping in and standing next to Logan.

"Why must you have such awful timing?" Logan sighed stressfully as the elevator doors slid shut. Remus looked at him, unable to verbally reply with the doctor standing right next to them. Fortunately, his unspoken request to elaborate was picked up on.

"This doctor is going down go the morgue. I was here to see a patient that died under his care, and I noticed how death seemed to latch onto him. I got curious."

Sounds like a bad doctor, if even a deity of death was interested in him. Heh, that probably said a lot about Remus too. 

Logan elaborated for Remus’ misinterpreting amused expression. "Remus, he murders patients purposefully. You should not have gotten on this elevator."

...Oh. Remus looked past Logan to the doctor, who had noticed his glances.

"...Hm, aren't you supposed to be in your room? Broken leg, road burn, lacerations?" He questioned, eyes flicking down to where he assumed Remus must be injured.

"Nope! You’re thinking of my twin. I came to visit him today." Remus responded as chipper as he could manage, suddenly a lot more unnerved knowing that this apparently dangerous doctor knew about his brother.

"Ah! I see. I did wonder how you managed to grow a full moustache in a day." The man chuckled. "Twins… quite fascinating."

Uh oh spaghetti-os. "Yeah… people say we're like two unrelated people, we’re so different." Remus laughed dismissively. It didn't seem to bother the doctor. 

"Interesting… Say, a partner of mine is conducting a study on the differences in the individual psychologies of monozygotic twins. I'm sure it would please her to get more data, if you'd be interested in participating. There would be monetary compensation for your time, of course." 

"This is such an unethical form of recruitment. What kind of professional are you?" Logan argued in frustration. Remus almost burst into laughter on the spot from the bizarreness of the situation, but he somehow managed to turn it into an agreeable grin instead. 

"Sounds good, doc." Remus said. 

"What-?!" Logan exclaimed. Remus spared him a glance, hoping it would let him know he knew what he was doing. Logan didn't look placated in the slightest.

"Excellent! I'll pass the details onto your brother and we can arrange a meeting sometime this week.”

At that moment, the elevator stopped to let a few other people on. Remus took the opportunity to head out before they could reach the basement floor. 

“See you later!” He called to both the Doctor and Logan.

“REMUS!”

--------------

Case 4.5: the dead doctor.

The next time they meet, Remus fully expects it.

Roman asks him over text why he volunteered them for a study, and Remus makes some vague excuse like ‘sexy doctor’. Thankfully, he bought it.

Before the date sent to them by the doctor, Remus decided to do his own research first. To do so, he contacted Virgil and asked for details on the man. 

After copious amount of friendly jabs (like 'oooh Remus, I didn’t know tall, straight, and boring was your type'), Virgil told him his name and not much else, given that xe wasn't exactly close with the older staff member. That was fine; Remus used the information to find online profiles, where he found contact details and photos, where he found business accounts, where he found history.

After pulling a few more strings from people that owed him one, he managed to gain access to the vital records from the hospital. It didn’t take long to discover that Logan was right, there had been a spike in deaths since the doctor, a mister 'Stacey’, had begun working there. It was a mystery how no one had noticed the pattern honestly. Weren't doctors supposed to get their licences taken away after a certain number of incidents? As he begun looking through the files more closely however, he realized that the deaths were often chalked up to accidents; small things that could have been due to anything, from mistakes during operations, to the patients overdosing on their prescribed medication, to incidents days after they’ve been discharged.

As Remus closed his laptop, he begun feeling very glad he had impulsively accepted Stacey’s offer. 

--

The meeting ended up being scheduled for Friday evening, and by the time it rolled around, Remus was fully prepared and waiting outside of the agreed location. He dialled Roman’s number, looking out to the empty parking lot and familiarizing himself with the location.

After a few rings, Roman picked up, sounding slightly agitated. “Yes, Captain Dookey?”

Remus snickered at the old nickname-- it was practically a relic from when they played pirates as children. Perhaps Roman was feeling sentimental after his accident.

“Aye aye first mate. You should know that I’m not gonna make it to the study. I already called Dr. Stacy to let him know we’re cancelling for today, so you can stay home.”

“Really Remus? I just got ready.”

“Yeah well, you’re supposed to be resting anyway. Unless you want to drop a visit by yourself that is, but Virgil told me he’s straight, soooo...”

He heard a retching sound on the other end of the line.

“No thanks.” A sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, I guess.”

“Bye, ugly.”

“Later, Rat Bastard.”

“Rats are cute, that’s not an insult. Byeee~.” Remus quickly hung up, his grin quickly fading as he took in the apartment complex. 

It didn’t look like the sort of space that would house an office, but Stacey didn’t look like the type to break the Hippocratic oath either, so perhaps the world wasn’t as straight-forward as it seemed.

Slipping his phone away, Remus buzzed the number he’d been given, and it wasn’t long before the good doctor himself came down to answer the door personally.

“Remus.” Stacey almost looked surprised to see him. “Is your brother not coming?”

“Oh, no.” Remus waved a hand. “I just got off the phone with him and he told me he’s running late. He said to get started without him.”

He received a charming smile. “That works just fine. Come on in.”

Stacey led him up the stairs to his apartment, and the whole time Remus felt the weight of the kitchen knife in his pocket. When they got to the ‘office’ (which was really just a living room with minimal furnishing), he offered him a drink.

“No thanks, I’m good.” Remus said, looking around. “...Seems pretty empty in here for an office.”

“Ah… Yes, unfortunately my colleague is having renovations done in her usual space, so we’ll have to collect our data here. I hope that doesn’t bother you.”

A fair enough explanation on the surface, and one his brother would probably accept if he was here, but Remus wasn’t nearly as trusting as Roman was. Nor was he as ignorant to the true purpose of this meeting.

“I see… That makes sense. Or at least it would, if I didn’t already know all about your dirty little secrets.”

Stacey glanced up from where he’d been looking for a pen. “...Pardon?”

Remus smiled back; a grin with all teeth. “You have quite a few skeletons in your closet, doc. Even for a fine medical professional like yourself.”

The doctor very carefully didn’t react to that. "My apologies, do you have the right person? To the best of my knowledge we've only spoken once." 

"Yeah." Remus agreed. "And once is all it took. I found out about all those little accidents that follow you, doctor. Weird how many times your patients pass away from nicked veins and potassium chloride overdoses, hm?"

The only outward response Stacey gave was the clenching of his fists. Subtle, but Remus noticed it. "Be careful Mr. Kaneshiro, because that sounds an awfully lot like a baseless accusation. People sue for that, you know." 

"I don't doubt it. But you already know it's not so baseless, don't you? You know exactly what I’m talking about, which is why you invited us here to a shady apartment late at night, no colleague in sight."

"Remus what the hell do you think you're doing?!" A familiar voice chimed from behind him.

Remus startled out of his focus, whipping his head around. "Logan?" 

"Don't look at me, you ignoramus-! You met a serial killer alone after I told you to stay away?!"

"He knows my brother, I couldn't just-!"

Remus looked back at the doctor was closer now, looking down at him pitifully. "I see now. The talking to air, the erratic behaviour, the pushing your delusions onto others… you mustn't be well. It's alright, Mr. Kaneshiro, I could easily refer you to a mental health facility who will take care of you."

"Remus, you have to get out! Now!" 

"I know!" He wasn’t a complete idiot, damn it! But he needed to get Stacey to confess or-

"Ah, perfect! If you wait here, I’ll go and make a call." 

Remus stepped backwards, hand going to the knife in his pocket. He needed Stacey to confess, but if he didn’t-

Unfortunately, Stacey noticed his movement and quickly grabbed his left wrist, putting way too much pressure in his grip than was necessary. 

"Ah-ah. I told you to stay put, didn't I? Come now, don't be difficult. I'm only trying to get you the help you need."

If he didnt-

"Let go of him!" Logan demanded to the man who couldn't hear him. 

Stacey froze, feeling the cool touch of Death on his arm as Logan tried to pull him away, and at that moment Remus pulled his knife out and stabbed him in the chest; slipping the blade right between the ribs. 

Red pooled around the knife, staining his crisp white shirt vividly. Stacey stared at the knife, and dug his nails into Remus’ wrist. 

"Fucker." Remus yelped with pain, pulling the weapon back out. 

Finally, Stacey let go and stumbled back, hitting the wall and sliding down to the floor. His expression didn't recover from the shock from when Logan touched him; he didn't even try to apply pressure to the wound as he bled out. He just sat there until the light left his eyes, and the only sound left in the room was Remus’ laboured breathing.

"I… shouldn't have done that." Logan muttered, eyeing the limp body. 

"Done what? I'm the one that killed him. That was my backup plan all along." Remus replied numbly, looking at the scene he had caused. 

"I gave him the touch of Death, it's- it's an omen. I'm not supposed to use it ever."

"Gee, I'm flattered. I promise murder was always on my brain though." Remus said as he took the tape recorder out of his pocket. No need for this anymore. He wanted to get a clip of Stacey saying something incriminating so that he could defame him and ruin his reputation, but well, him not being able to benefit from a reputation at all was the next best thing.

Logan watched him, taking in the claw marks across his wrist. "...Right. He scratched you, so remember to clean under his nails." 

Despite everything, Remus smiled softly at the advice. "Aww, you really care about me, don't you?"

"I- no. Absolutely not. That’s absurd" Remus snickered as Logan flushed an adorable shade of paynes grey, which he hid by going to deal with the corrupt doctor’s soul. 

"...Why did you show up, by the way? There isn't anyone dead in this apartment is there?" Remus realized belatedly, looking around the empty space. 

"Ah… No. Admittedly, I've been keeping a closer eye on this town than I really should, and after what happened the other day, I figured I needed to be here when I noticed you two meeting… I probably shouldn’t have.” Logan conceded.

"Well, at least you can't say this wasn't a business visit." Remus giggled to himself, wiping the blood from his knife with a tissue. Maybe he was a little giddy from the endorphins of confronting a prolific serial killer, or perhaps it was the confirmation that Logan cared for him, but either way he felt really good right now, like he could take on the world.

Logan looked at him and sighed. "I should've known you'd be trouble. No more killing, Remus. This has to be the last time."

"Of course, pinky promise~."

"...I can see you crossing your fingers behind your back, you brat."

--------------

Case 5: the one who tried to get away.

The next time they met, Remus broke his pinky promise. No surprises there.

It was hardly even a promise to begin with, but for some reason Logan expected him to stick to it. Quite foolish, if you ask Remus, given that he now had a total of three murders under his belt, and stopping there almost felt like giving up. 

Of course, he had to lay low after Stacey however. The hospital was holding a memorial for his death and Remus later found out that it was ruled a break in. (Made sense, since Remus took a few of his fancy cleaning products on the way out, as a treat to himself.)

It was a shame Stacey was being remembered so honourably, but he couldn't really do anything about that. At least he wasn't out in the world hurting more people. 

But unfortunately for Remus, the ruling of Stacey’s murder didn’t stop the incident from trickling into his normal life, as Virgil and Roman seemed to grow suspicious of him. Virgil didn't bring up the topic to him directly, but xe begun acting sketchy when the two of them hung out (Though that could easily be wariness after having one of xyr co-workers be killed). Oppositely, Roman brought the topic up at the first chance possible.

"Dr. Stacey was murdered the night we were supposed to meet him." Roman commented the next day they were able to have lunch together, arms crossed confrontationally. "Funny that."

"Yeah. Sounds like we had some pretty good luck, if you ask me." Remus grinned.

"Wha- why are you smiling?! A man died!" His twin hissed at him. Under his breath, as to not alert the other tables.

Remus’ grin faded. "Listen Ro-bro, I didn't want to tell you this but our good doctor wasn't as kind as you think he is. I called you off that night to help you. Trust me. It’s better off that neither of us went through with that ‘study’."

Roman leaned back, looking unconvinced. "What were you doing instead, Remus?"

"...Huh?"

"You heard me. Where were you? What's your alibi?"

"You're not accusing your own flesh and blood of murder, are you?" Remus sipped his drink casually; ice coffee with as many pumps of peppermint syrup as the barista would allow. 

"Just answer the question." Siiigh, what a tightass. How did they come out the same womb? 

"I was meeting an old friend, for your information. Logan." Remus smiled to himself at the inside joke.

"Logan? You've never mentioned a Logan before." Roman raised his eyebrows.

Remus leaned back in his chair with a shrug, opting to look out the window instead. By doing so he missed the flash of complicated emotions that crossed his twin’s face at the dismissive gesture.

"I don't tell you everything about my life, brother dearest."

"Clearly…"

--

A week or two passed since his conversation with Roman, and during that time Remus didn't get to see Logan again once. That wasn't such a terrible thing, most people would assume, to not run into a deity of death, but Remus was so bored! He wanted to see his favourite death pal again, but no opportunities arose to do that, and nothing was striking his murder-fancy.

That was until the day he saw a familiar licence plate parked outside a shop.

Remus froze in his tracks, remembering the night he last saw that car.

A woman crossing the street, a body too still, a car speeding away with no remorse-

Remus had given the licence number to the police, but clearly they hadn't done anything about it. Or perhaps they'd tried and the asshole bought them off. 

He growled at the idea, startling a passer-by who was crossing around him.

Thankfully, he didn't have to wait long before he found out who his ire belonged to. A familiar face left the shops and begun walking towards the car; Anton, a guy who had been a year above him back in high school. Remus’ memory of the man was vague; primarily made up of snapshots of cruelty and entitlement towards those around him.

He looked exactly the same, with his annoyingly polished appearance and ugly overpriced clothes. So he was right about the police being paid off, then. Typical.

He'd just have to do something about this himself. 

--

“I suppose there’s no point in trying to convince you to stop this, is there?”

“I mean.” Remus begun, looking down at the body he had just finished suffocating and rubbing at his bruised arms. There was more of a struggle than tv had led him to believe. “I kinda had to do this one. What? Was I supposed to connect the dots on a murder and not stalk and kill the guy who got away unpunished?”

“Most people would say yes.” Logan groaned, in the sort of tone that said he already knew he was fighting a losing battle.

“We’re not like most people though, are we?” Remus grinned, fluttering his eyelashes.

“You’re most certainly not. I’m barely a person.” Logan replied with finality.

--------------

Case 6: the one who pushed their luck.

And then shortly after; 

“Come on man, don’t do this.” The masked person pleaded, hanging onto the fire-escape for dear life. Literally.

Remus raised an eyebrow, making a show of contemplating the request. “Hmm, I don’t know. You did try to pull a gun on me.”

“It wasn’t loaded, jackass!” 

Remus tutted and held his foot over the person’s clammy hands. They shook violently at the unspoken threat. “And now you’re gonna wake up the whole neighbourhood too? No consideration!”

His joking tone must have angered them, because they began struggling to hoist themself back up again, red in the face with strain. “I swear, when I get up  there-”

Promptly losing his interest in hearing the rest of that threat, Remus stood on their fingers, causing them to let go of the fire-escape and plummet to the street below with a strangled yell.

“Whoopsie daisy.”

He leaned over the banister, whistling innocently as a familiar presence appeared next to him. Logan joined him in peering down at the body, eyebrow raised.

“At least this one was merely an accident?” He guessed by the cause of death, a twinge of hope in his voice.

“Nah, they’ve tried breaking in at least 3 times this year. It was getting annoying.”

As Logan scolded him for his recklessness, Remus decided not to comment on it when their topic of conversation turned back towards the casual banter they usually shared. The two of them stood on the fire escape until the sun was on the edge of the horizon and Remus had to dash back to his apartment to avoid being seen by the early-commuters.

--------------

Case 8: the innocent.

And then: 

Remus curiously nudged the raccoon with the tip of his boot. He’d just stumbled upon it and it still looked fresh; given that he was standing by a busy road, it was no wonder what had happened.

He was making a mental note to come back and collect the bones at a later date, when Logan appeared in-front of him in a blink, looking completely unsurprised this time around.

Remus on the other hand startled before regaining his bearings and shooting the deity a smile. “Our paths are looking less parallel by the day huh, Psychopomp-ous?”

Logan raised his eyebrows appreciatively at the word play. “It appears so. It’s quite the pleasant surprise to find you not getting into trouble for once.”

“There’s always tomorrow.” Remus wiggled his eyebrows back. “That said, I really didn’t expect to see you. I was wondering for a while if you dealt with this kind of thing too, y’know.”

Logan looked down, seeming to really notice the raccoon for the first time. He nodded after a beat. ”She had a life too. My brother brought her into the world, and so I must escort her out.” 

”Yeah? Anything of note happen?” Remus asked, eyebrows raised with genuine curiosity. He’d file away the latter half of Logan’s statement for later prodding.

”...She had a family. They stayed together under the porch of an old couple.”

“Ah, to be a racoon living under a porch.” Remus lamented dreamily. “I’m glad she got to live such a rich and fulfilling life before becoming road kill. I’m truly jealous.”

“In the wild, your lifespan would most likely be around 2–3 years as a raccoon.” Logan pointed out, attempting to contradict his idealistic tone.

“Exactly. The life.”

That earned a pinched expression from Logan that made Remus titter.

“Just messing with you, prim reaper~. Now, do you have any idea how long it’s going to take for her to decompose? I have a new piece of decor to make.”

--------------

Case 11: the matchbox.

Remus watched from afar as the house on Psyche Avenue burned. It was bright and brilliant, so of course the firefighters were already on the scene, trying to calm the fire and save the occupant inside. 

They’d be much too late; the trafficker was already unconscious and likely burning to death, along with any evidence Remus might have left behind. It was the perfect crime.

Satisfied with today’s work, he took a drag of a cigarette, delighted when Logan appeared beside him instead of with the dirtbag who deserved to burn forever (and since it was a mystery whether he'd end up with such a fate, it only seemed fitting for Remus to play god and speed up the process.)

“Those kill, you know.” Logan said in greeting.

“That makes two of us.” Remus grinned sharply, even when Logan rolled his eyes and pinched out the end of his cigarette.

For the second time in a month, the two of them overlooked the sky together, illuminated by the amber blazes of the fire. It almost felt like a date.

--------------

Case 13: the one with bad luck.

He was back in the alley that had imprinted itself so clearly in his memory, knife buried in the chest of a would-be assailant. Remus was boredly watching the blood seep between the bricks when Logan finally appeared to deal with the body.

“You’re late!” Remus complained with a whine. “This guy’s practically cold already.”

“Apologies. There was a flash flood across the country, and it took more of my focus to handle than I would've liked."

Remus hummed. He thought he heard something about that on the news. Mother nature could be cruel indeed. Perhaps even worse than Remus himself. 

“Anyone nearby?” He checked.

“Not in a half-mile radius, no. However, the police may be on their way.” 

“Plenty of time, then.” Remus said as he pulled Logan down to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

It had been months since that first drunk sloppy kiss happened, and less time since it had become a regular greeting. Remus would never get tired of the feeling of cold skin against his lips. It was like kissing marble-- if marble had a sassy mouth and a sexy amount of knowledge.

Logan pulled back first, smudging away the trail of blood running from Remus' nostril. “Did you have any trouble?”

“Nah, you should see the other guy.”

That earned a laugh-- a quiet chime that made Remus’ heart flutter. “I see them. Good job, you’re getting rather skilled at that.”

“Why, thank you~.” Remus preened under the praise. “It only took a couple tries, but I think I finally got the technique down pat.”

“Hmm. Speaking of 'Pat', my brother doesn’t seem to like this much. He’s not unappreciative of your choices in target, although he appears to be rather disapproving on the amount of times I've been called to your side."

Logan didn't talk about his brother much: the deity of life. From what little Remus had learned from his prying and Logan’s own complaints, he seemed like a bit of a killjoy. He blew a raspberry in response.

"Tell Patton to stop making so many criminals and maybe I'll consider it." 

The corner of Logan's lips quirked up. "I don't think I will, as humorous as I'm sure that would be. It doesn't quite work like that."

Remus shrugged, watching as Logan looked off to the side.

"...It seems I’m needed elsewhere."

”You can’t stay? We barely got to talk.” Remus said with a pout.

“Unfortunately so.” Logan turned to the body; what he should have been there for. It wasn’t long before his focus was back on Remus, though. “That said... It’s a busy night. Perhaps we’ll meet again sooner than expected.”

Remus’ frown tipped back into a smile as he watched Logan vanish. He then turned on his heel and retrieved his knife before walking off into the night. If he was going to make good on Logan’s expectations, he better get to work.

--------------

Case 0: the one who death followed.

It soon became an established pattern; Remus would come across someone shady, and he’d put together a detailed- or straight-forward- plot on how to get rid of them. By now his city must have noticed the string of deaths, but with such a random means and very little evidence, Remus was free to continue as he pleased.

In a sense, he was untouchable with Logan by his side, pointing out anything he left behind and giving warning for any potential witnesses. Especially when he gave up on persuading Remus away from this path. It's not like the moral argument could be made anymore; the city had seen a drastic decrease in crime once Remus had taken out a lot of big players (even if there was an air of fear that lingered in the back of everyone's minds, wondering if they'd be next up on the chopping block).

All in all, it was enough to make Remus cocky; perhaps even enough so to lead to his downfall. But how was he ever going to give up now? All his life he’d been hoping for some sort of excitement to fulfil him, and he finally found it in a surprise meeting with a deity of death. Death had gone from a distant longing to something familiar and welcome; something he could use to right wrongs and feel a sense of purpose with.

And as long as he was able to exchange a life for one more meeting with his beloved partner in crime, he would do his best to stay ahead of the game. 

(No matter who was out there, trying to stop the two of them.)

-------------- 

Writing taglist: @just-perhaps @sashootkahoot @anxious-l0ser @illogical-immunity @overlad-of-the-snakes @varthandi @whisperinginthevoid @and-this-sword @creamiiteaa-xx

Deityfucker au taglist: @arodynamic-enby @its-the-usda-certified-trashman @overlad-of-the-snakes @aromanticwhore @haha-phrog @hetalianhufflepuff @emeryyleaf @winter-wandering @gaylotusthatexists @8bituin

[masterhandss]

Hi~

I'm curious about what you think a Hamefura-GBF crossover would look like ^^

OP YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU HAVE AWAKENED IN ME WITH THIS QUESTION AJSHGJAHSGD

As a fan of both I've always created different ideas in my mind of what a GBF-Hamefura collab would be like!! I'm not really creative enough to be able to drop some fan-made collab name ideas or a full premise for the collab's plot, just some random tidbits of fun ideas I thought of.

// warning: very minor spoilers for the novels/fortune lover 2

For how Katarina and the gang gets into the world of Granblue Fantasy, I think it would be really cool if it combines something like the Shadowverse collab where they are just thrown into the world without much explanation (maybe playing it out like another Book of Desires-type thing where Katarina stumbles upon a magic tool that sends them all there) and the Love Live Muse collab where it's kinda just a dream. Not that I want Katarina to dream the entire thing, I just find it really funny how in the Manga Bonus SS, Katarina immediately figures out that she's in a dream and just plays along, which would make her nonchalance about being thrown into another world funny and make sense (for her at least). Maybe in the end it could be revealed to be a dream all along, like the Love Live and most recent Deresute collab.

For the plot itself, I'm not really good at coming up up anything new, all I can think of is making something similar to existing collabs and events qwq. It would really funny if the primal beast behind everything is one who is gluttonous, and Katarina beats them in a competition of iron stomachs (like the Priconne collab and Eating Bonanza Summer event). Or have the event story end with Katarina confronting and talking down a humanoid primal beast and charming him into surrender post-battle, something similar to how she won over Raphael (imagine how funny it would be for Keith to smack his head and sigh, as Katarina continues to charm more people, and a primal beast at that XDD).

Maybe even something like the Code Geass collab where at the same time Katarina and the gang end up in the Sky Realm, the crew is on a quest to find a criminal who is stirring trouble in an island, and that criminal had a striking resemblance to Katarina (or an FL2!Katarina). Like that other Katarina is just an illusion created by a primal beast in order to hide his identity, not really basing the image on anyone specific but just creating someone based on the perfect image of a scheming villainess lmao (and being surprised after finding out that the very girl does exist). Cue confusion from the crew and the harem, while Katarina feels both pride and fear over being called the spitting image of a villainess hgfjhsdgf.

You can even make the plot something like the GBF SideM collab + Hamefura Pirates, where the situation they are in is actually from a Fortune Lover x GBF collab (that Katarina dreams Acchan playing/was mentioned to her once in passing) that somehow (???) has ties to Katarina's fate in FL2.

And please, I would love a quick scene of everyone dining with the crew, and everyone comments on Katarina and Lyria's black hole of a stomach XDD

It would kinda be cool if Katarina had a moment where she uses Phalanx, since VOD showed us that there are shield-type spells in hamefura (canonicity is debatable though) but I guess since Nico already did that in the Love Live collab that'd be copying/too similar haha).

For the event rewards, Katarina would join your party after Chapter2 of course :DD By then she would have met the crew. The other playable characters depends on who you ask to be honest. I don't want to sound mean or anything to the fans of the girls, but when I first encountered the question, my mind immediately went the NinSwitch otome game and how all the boys are the capturable characters. Since HameFura clearly favors the Katarina + the boys in the marketing, I thought realistically that if there was a collab, the playable characters would be them. That would be 5 playable characters though, which might be a lot so I guess a good alternative is a Playable Katarina, Geordo, Keith and maybe Maria too. Combining the three girls into a single unit wouldn't be likely, I think it's more realistic to assume they would be the event summon instead (or at least have a cameo in Katarina's victory animation)

(LOOK I EVEN MADE SOME QUICK EDITS/MOCKUPS, DO YOU SEE HOW EXCITED I AM ABOUT THIS QUESTION HGJHSDGF)

Katarina would be a Dark SSR (sorry if that's considered as a spoilers to anyone qwq) whose attacks also inflict a partial earth damage. She would be an attack-type character with a sabre and axe specialty (axe because hoe haha). I just can't imagine her being an Earth Character unless Keith isn't playable, because then I guess she could just inflict partial dark damage via casted debuffs in order to reference FL2. She's probably mostly has attack skills that either gives buffs or increases her charge bar. Katarina would get a 5 star uncap in the next event rerun :P

Geordo would be a Fire SSR with a sabre specialty. He's be an attack-type character who specializes in Attack/Support. Spoilers to the light novels kinda, but I imagine Geordo to have a special third skill that gives him lots of buffs but either debuffs him & kills him eventually (like Dark Jeanne) or sacrifices his HP (like Fire Yuisis) as a reference to Volume 8, where he's a bit unhinged when he's angry and will use his fire magic lethally to anyone who harms his friends.

Keith would be an Earth SSR with a sabre and staff specialty. He would be Special character, acting as a Support/Debuffer. I imagine that he could have his own personal buff called "Earth Dolls" that get consumed each turn, and having a lot would increase the damage of his charge attack. I know the picture says katana instead of staff, I'm just too lazy to edit it again :'))

Alan would be a Water SSR with a sabre and gun specialty (why gun? he uses a gun in the hamefura fantasy au so :DD). He'd be a balanced-type character who is an Attacker/Defender. I imagine he'd be like SSR Romeo, who is good for defense but is preferably used to deal some damage (or at least that's how I use him lmao).

Nicol would be a Wind SSR with a sabre and bow specialty (bow because wind element :DD). He would be a defense-type character who specializes in Defense/Support. Either lands some good debuffs (Def Down, Debuff Success Boosted, Blind, Gravity and CHARM OF COURSE) or has Substitute Ally. Most likely the prior. I know that sounds like he should be a special-type character instead so I'm suggesting he should have a skill with Shield and Immune in a single package.

I imagine the girls to be an event summon together (in my hypothetical scenario where the boys are the playable characters) where they give random buffs (like 3-6 buffs depending on the lvl and uncap). I imagine that they would have a special Call Effect with Katarina, giving her more buffs or a special buff meant just for her :DD

In the event that Maria is a playable character, she would be a Light SSR who has a staff specialty. She would be a Heal-type character who specializes in Support. Her skills could have stuff like a heal that activates for a few turns, light def-down and a def-up to name a few.

The event SSR weapon would be a "Doom Flag" of course! It blends perfectly with the dozen other flag-looking spear weapons in the game XDD

My ideas for the SR weapon would either the "Doom Avoidance Strategy Book" which would be a Dark Melee weapon, or a smaller "Bad End Doom Flag" which would be a Fire Dagger (haha get it, because Geordo Bad End :)).

Hahaha that's all I can really think of when it comes to a collab. If you want me to talk about a Hamefura RPG AU, but with GBF classes/races then I can make a whole other post for that sjkfhdsk i've always wanted to draw/imagine the hamefura characters wearing job classes & magic from GBF!

Imagine Mary wearing the Dancer/Masquerade class outfit, Maria in the Doctor class, Alan in the Elysian class, Nicol in the Cavalier/Robin Hood class, Geordo in the Glorybringer class, Keith in the Relic Buster class (as a reference for him being a black knight in the manga bonus ss), Sophia in the Warlock/Asparas class, and Katarina in the Chrysaor/Lumberjack class!!

If anyone would like to add with more collab ideas, I would love to hear it!!!!

Anyways, thank you for the ask :DD