#not sure what I expected

[thedesertpenguin]

*me opening Instagram* Oh the Bridgerton account posted to their story! Are they giving a hint about s3 (delusional)

Them: We have Funko Pops!!

Me:

[remedialchaoticscreaming]

decaf earl gray is mediocre.

[bastardcherub]

ever since I started training myself to be more vocal when cumming it feels So Wrong to force myself to stay silent during. interesting

[bijoumikhawal]

fascinating what organizations email you for

[multishipper-baby]

So Kokichi's organization are just... Clowns, huh.

[ibex-ascendant]

There is an entire contingent of Knives stans on Twitter who have convinced themselves that Rem was actually an abuser.

Incredible.

[beardedhandstoadshark]

Anyways, anyone want a live reaction summary of that movie? Well here it is anyways

(Cw for mentions of all the stuff typical for a jumpscare horror movie)

They‘re unironically trying to sell the house of the first movie as a spooky lost place far off a spooky village filled with distrustful and unsettling people it. Such scary individuals like. A middle-aged lady looking at them though a window. Or five guys sitting on stairs. And emo teens. Spooky

The random old crazy guy who tells them it’s DaNgeRous here while laughing totally maniacally before going GET OFF MY LAWN because of course

DEER

Also, our characters: MC Arthur fanboy whose 18th birthday it is, MC‘s love interest who thinks MC should grow up, Logan Paul Hair and his bro Goatee guy, Token dark skinned funny guy, Glasses guy afraid of frogs who‘s kinda got the same outfit and speaking style to yours truly fr that’s just me, Glasses girl with camera, pretty blonde girl. Prediction: all of them except MC, Love interest and one of the bros die

Ok they arrived at the house, whimsical music plays as they look amazed at the trees blooming pink when it’s not even spring…only for the music to cut out when they see they’re made of plastic. Ngl that was kinda funny

Spooky black feather stuck in a secret small door leading to a basement that wasn’t part of the movie oOoOOoh

Now it’s dark, they’re making a bonfire outside, and there’s spooky Hippopotamus noises (that’s what they called them in the movie)

NOT THE MC GETTING NIGHTMARES ABOUT DEER AND FLASHBACK SCENES FROM THE FIRST MOVIE LMAO

There‘s hidden figures in the woods with lanterns and this dude calls the names of some dudes they saw a lost place video of that house of. And when they suddenly all vanish he just goes back to bed

The bros are going to a river and glasses guy got lost in the woods while ominous music plays, Oh they’re absolutely not coming back F to them

Spooky random hole that’s seemingly endless but makes spooky sounds, check

There‘s suddenly spooky fog out of nowhere surrounding glasses guy. He touched a weird tree that had moss all over except for a part that looks like the outline of someone hugging the tree, and got punched in the face. Meanwhile the bros chill until blood drops on the one guy, aaaaand the filter switched to grey! 50min of nothing and then it escalates completely. This movie is 1.5h long btw

Turns out they found one of the guys from the video hanging from a tree after not seeing he‘s there for like 20min, dude steps on a super obvious bear trap trying to get him, but ngl the actors are doing a good job at acting as far as I can tell with the dub.

Holy heck these characters are actually kinda competent - nvm they’re

Everyone forgot about glasses guy tho lol

Ooaoaoaooh glasses girl is looking at a photo of them and there’s a spooOoKy guy visible in the window

OH HECK FIRST KILL. Glasses girl got killed by BEES.

GLASSES GUY IS GONE GUY. He hugged a tree headless. Literally, he‘s hugging a tree and his head is gone. Also wow token and MC aren’t reacting at ALL oof

LMAOO THEY SHOWED THE SPOOKY GUY AND ITS UNIRONICALLY JUST A GUY IN A HOODIE

Apparently the whole house is just built on random holes connected to slopes and LI happened to sit above one on a swing. SG cut the rope and she fell down, almost made it out, but then a spooky hand grabbed her down. Where did the rest attached to that hand go? Who knows, it’s SpoOky

omg. You know how in guardians of the galaxy and such that one character thinks he’s invisible because he’s moving so slow? And it’s played as a joke? Yeah they just did that unironically with a guy standing in front of a door all this time I can’t-

Yknow these guys who originally helped Arthur become a minimoy? Yeah they evil

"You wanna go into the world of the minimoys? The time had come, it’s a fUul MoOn!“ shows half full moon"No it isn’t“ "doesn’t matter lol“ <- that’s real dialogue

Surprise attack by a bunch of dudes dressed like Bokoblins from Breath of the Wild attacking everyone with daggers, turning this whole thing into a breakout Battle Royale, F blonde Girl

CRAZY OLD GUY TO THE RESCUE!

Aaaand now it’s randomly over. No signal or reason or anything, it just is.

Survivors: MC, MC‘s LI, and the token guy! A surprise twist!

…the explanation for all of this. Is Role-Playing.

A bunch of teens meeting each year to role-play a new theme. The year before it was Batman. This year it was Arthur and the Minimoys. And they go kill everyone like this because of drugs. Doesn’t explain all the stuff that was going beforehand. Or the secret basement. Or holes. Or anything really

OoOOoh Spooky Hoodie Guy is still standing at the window

(Also what happened to the deer imagery? They set that up for half the movie but the moment the forbidden ketchup starts appearing they completely forget all of it. ALSO the trailer showed spooky versions of the Minimoys. Guess what never makes an appearance.)

Conclusion: would give this movie a solid 4.5/10 for two funny lines and the guys playing the bros doing a pretty good job at putting emotion in

[teatraysandtypewriters]

[tariah23]

White people are miserable, racist losers period. They’ve even been getting mad at Japanese people for correcting them about Yasuke as well.

[pupplushy]

oh hey there's the extreme wave of touchstarvedness wondering when that would hit

[sunset-peril]

I don't think the lovely people over at FamilyEcho.com designed their program with the expectation that it would be used for pedigrees à la deranged BOTW author.

[kvltoris]

felt bad. watched threads. feel worse 👍

[a-pit-of-lies]

I was on reddit (mistake) and I commented that I'm against pesticide use (the post was a cat killing moles in someone's garden and how thats a natural form of pesticide) and someone replied that it's disgusting how I'm pro worldwide starvation.

[idk-anymore-mydudes]

My friend just watched a TikTok that had Olivia Rodrigo's song "American Bitch" as the music. I could not get the unstated message for the life of me, and my friend had to explain that the woman is super cautious when her husband is gone but feels safer and thus is "grateful all the time" when her husband is home.

So, yeah, I mean the lyrics do read "grateful all the time", but considering that Rodrigo's having a go at impossible female standards, including the restrictions of never being angry and always being grateful, I'm not quite sure that was the best use of the song.

[jakeperalta]

letting celebrities think they can and should "use their platform" to speak on all current events and political issues regardless of how educated they are on them was a grave mistake

[captain-krow-drozdov]

Danny Is An Alternate Version Of Ra's Al Ghul And Flash Already Called Dibs On Adopting Him

Danny In All His Sleep Deprived Slightly Scuffed Up From A Fight Glory Is On His Way To Clockworks Tower To Hopefully Get A Nap And Maybe Some Homework Done When A Natural Portal Opens Up In Front Of Him And Proceeds To Unceremoniously Drop Him In The DC Verse Just Outside Of Central City Before Promptly Closing Leaving A Tired Danny Behind In A Run Down Abandoned Parking Lot.

It's Times Like This When Danny Regrets Putting Off Learning How To Make His Own Portals, Cause Now He Is Very Much Stuck For The Foreseeable Future And He Has No Idea Where Or When He Is. Luckily For Him However Central City Isn't Too Far Away, Unlucky For Him However Is That Once In The City He Realizes This Isn't His Dimension. He's Pretty Sure He'd Remember Something Called The Justice League.

So What Do You Do When Supernatural Bullshit Fails You? You Fall Back On Your Mad Scientist Roots And You Make A Portal Gun. So That's Exactly What Danny Plans To Do.

Unfortunately Staying Alive And Building Questionably Safe Portal Technology Requires Money And Supplies, So He Ends Up Wandering From City To City Doing Odd Jobs/Fixing Up Busted Tech For Cash Or Unwanted Electronics For His "Operation: Get Home" Needs. This Obviously Ends In A Few Superhero Encounter Shenanigans.

Though He Always Ends Up Back Near Central City, Both On The Off Chance The Natural Portal Will Open Up Again And Because Out Of All The Superheroes That Apparently Exist In This Universe The Speedsters Are His Favorite (Red Robin Is Solidly His Second Favorite Ever Since The Gotham Vigilante Gave Him A Large Coffee Filled With Enough Caffeine To Kill A Man).

Unbeknownst To Danny However Is That Every Hero/Vigilante He Has Encountered Has Come To At Least One Of The Following Conclusions; 1. Run Away Meta Who Is In Desperate Need Of A Good Meal/Adoption Bait. 2. Possibly Red Robin/Tim Drake Clone 3. A Good Kid But Could Possibly Be A Future Rouge If Left Unsupervised. 4. Did Bats Get A New Kid And Why Is He Here?

All Flash Knows Is That He Saw The Kid First And Therefore Has Dibs. Suck It Bruce.

Fast-forward A Few Months And Danny Gets Hurt During A Rogue Attack While Trying To Help Some Civilians Get To Safety (Old Hero Habits Die Hard (Ha Die Hard) And All That Jazz) And He Nopes Out Once Everyone Is Safe And When The Paramedics Are Busy With Other People Unaware He Left A Blood Sample Behind.

One DNA Test Brought To You By Paranoid Bat Concerns Of A Possible Red Robin Clone Later And They Find Out That Dannys DNA Matches One Ra's Al Ghul.

They Now Think Danny Is An Escaped Ra's Al Ghul Clone.

Memes For The Vibes: