#now excuse me while i go hide from the internet because my feelings are being perceived

[queer-reader-07]

a love letter to trans romance

because i can't be normal about media and i'm making it y'all's problems

hi hello and welcome to my mildly unhinged ramblings about love and gender. this post comes to you in three sections, enjoy <3

--

t4t romance novels made me believe in love again

the first romance book i ever read was The Feeling of Falling in Love by Mason Deaver. TFOFIL is a t4t (trans for trans) romance that follows a teenage trans boy, Neil Kearney, and a figuring-out-their-gender teen, Wyatt Fowler, as they get themselves wrapped up in peak YA romcom shenaniganary and eventually fall in love. cute, right? just a fun little romcom, not much more to it?

yeah well that's what i thought going in, but coming out of that book i was in tears. tears because i'd never read a story about trans love before. tears because at that point in my life i'd never allowed myself to fully claim the word "trans." tears because Wyatt made me feel so seen and so real.

there's this one scene where Wyatt is talking to Neil and they describe themself as being the kind of person who sometimes wants to wear makeup and dresses, but other times they like their body hair and scruffy beard. and i just remember nodding along and then absolutely melting because Neil takes it in stride, he comforts Wyatt and let's them know that they don't need to have it figured out just yet. Neil makes it clear that he's there, and that Wyatt doesn't need to come out to anyone unless they're ready.

Mason Deaver has another t4t romance, Okay, Cupid. and that similarly had me in my feels because there is something so special about finding people who embrace you for all that you are.

every t4t romance I've read has one thing in common, the fact that the love interests do not love each despite the other's transness. their transness is not an obstacle to love or to attraction or to adoration, it is an object of it. their transness is something to be admired and to be loved and to be cared for. it is not something the other has to "get over."

reading The Feeling of Falling in Love was the first time i ever thought to myself "maybe, just maybe, i can call myself trans and still be loved." because up until that point i hadn't let myself accept that i was some flavor of trans. up until that point i'd said "not cis" without ever saying trans because i was so scared my being trans would make me unlovable. t4t romance books showed me how wrong i was. they showed me that my ability to be loved was not dependent on my girlhood.

ha you thought i could write something this long on tumblr and NOT mention good omens? think again bestie

i have held a trans reading of crowley since i read the book and the show only solidified it for me. crowley canonically plays with gender.

he's dressed femme during the crucifixion scene, his modern look is a mix of men's and women's pieces, his hair is a Whole Thing in and of itself. i could go on but i digress.

but it's not just the way he plays with gender that informs my trans reading of him. it's also how his character arc can very easily be read as an allegory for transness.

an angel who falls (a girl who isn't a girl anymore)

a fallen angel turned demon (a girl who is a boy now)

a demon who isn't really a demon anymore (a used to be girl, a thought to be boy, is now nonbinary)

girl = angel and boy = demon is entirely arbitrary in this please don't read into it

now, you may be thinking "A how in god's name does this apply to trans romance?" to which i say, aziraphale falls in love with every version of crowley. aziraphale beams heart eyes at angel!crowley before the beginning and loves crowley as a demon for millennia and is so deeply and unabashedly in love with crowley in his not-quite-demon form of s2.

aziraphale loves all the versions of crowley because crowley's angel or demon-ness (gender) is not the reason aziraphale loves crowley. aziraphale doesn't love crowley because he's a demon or because he used to be an angel, aziraphale loves crowley because it's crowley. crowley in whatever clothes he chooses to where, crowley with whatever hairstyle he's fancying at the moment, crowley as he inhabits the shades of grey just a little more.

to me, that is so easy to read as a trans love story. you could argue it's t4t depending on how you read aziraphale, but to me, it's at the very least a love story between a mostly-demon who gets down to some gender fuckery and an angel who loves him very much.

fuck it let's talk about fanfiction

i don't think i could make this post without mentioning @ineffabildaddy's fic I'm Beginning to See the Light.

i have a complicated relationship with my body. i don't plan to ever medically transition because i don't want to make any permanent changes to my body. but there are days where all i want is to have a flat chest and hips that are flush with the rest of my body but instead i'm stuck with tits and an hourglass figure cis people always seem to focus on.

i don't hate my body, but the idea that anyone could look at it and not just see A Woman is beyond me. i walk through life being perceived as a very feminine woman even on the days that i feel the most androgynous. the idea that a lover could look at my body and still see me for who i am feels like a dream that could never happen.

and IBTSTL slapped me (lovingly) across the face with the message that, actually, i can be loved as my whole self and that there are people out there who don't look at me and see A Woman and those people don't love me any less. IBTSTL made me feel safe in my trans body because it said "you are worthy of love and adoration because your transness is not something to get past it is something to admire. it is something to love."

--

i think the point i'm trying to make here is this: trans love stories are so special to me. they've been so vital in my own journey to love and accept myself. they're the reason i can imagine myself maybe having romantic love in the future.

representation matters, it can quite literally change your life.

[slashyrogue]

Will doesn't know why he's here.

The teachers' conference had been postponed seven times in the past year, mostly because no one wanted to be stuck in Alaska listening to speakers telling them things they already knew.

Not even if they got paid.

He'd declined the last few years, mostly using the dogs as an excuse, but when Bev got sick just before the new dates changed to Christmas week she volunteered to watch his pack.

"Bev..."

"Go, Will," she said, coughing, "Go away from this sad house, get drunk, and maybe make a few friends out of your coworkers."

Will reluctantly agrees to go, despite being one of only four who said yes, and flied to Alaska with Gregory, Edgar, and Elisa all of which are in their late sixties to seventies and teach Shop, Gym, Math, and Home Economics while him being the lone science teacher made them all look at him oddly.

So now he's stuck, mostly alone, but in a very nice resort with people he has no desire to talk to.

Not a great Christmas week for him.

The second day had been a chore, long and boring the entire time, so now as he sat down by the fire he only hoped no one came to talk to him.

"Is this seat taken?"

Will looked up, ready to say yes, and blinked his cheeks turning red.

"I...um...no?"

The man that sat down beside him was dressed to the nines, his clothes so expensive looking that Will was sure he didn't belong here, and as he sipped from his mug Will was at a loss for words. He stared at him out of the corner of his eye, unable to stop, and wondered just where the most handsome man he'd ever seen had been hiding the last two days.

"Are you enjoying the conference?"

Will blinked. "What?"

The man smiled at him. "The conference," he repeated, his accent making Will's stomach flip, "Are you enjoying yourself?"

Will blushed. "I...um..."

He sipped his mug, still eyeing Will, who then let out a long sigh.

"No, no, not at all," he said, laughing, "If I have to listen to one more old man tell me that 'kids these days' need nothing but a sharp paddle I think I might stab someone."

The man laughed. "Yes, I....I agree. I just had to run from another group of people lamenting the 'horrors of the internet' like progress is a monster under their beds."

Will sighed. "Finally, someone who doesn't think progress is a bad thing."

"No, not at all, I...I'm sorry I didn't introduce myself," the man said, holding out his hand for Will to take.

Will took his hand, the strength of his grip doing things to Will, and shook.

"Will Graham."

"Dr. Hannibal Lecter."

"Doctor?" Will asked, "What...I mean...what do you teach?"

Hannibal smiled. "I am a guidance counselor. Yourself?"

Will blushed, pushing his glasses up his face. "Biology."

"We both help young people learn things about their bodies then, though I deal in their mind and feelings and you...tell them everything else."

Will smiled. "I guess," he said, "I...I still can't believe they made this near Christmas. Most people have things to do."

"And families to come home to," Hannibal finished, his smile fading.

Will frowned. "I didn't mean to change the subject or bring down the room. I just..."

"You didn't, Will, I assure you. I just...I suppose I lament at times not being able to use a family as an excuse."

"You don't..."

"My immediate family have long since passed, and I am unattached. Yourself?"

"Same," he said, "I guess we're just a couple of sad, single people."

"I wouldn't call myself sad," Hannibal said, sipping his mug, "Just...lonesome at times."

"Yeah."

They both looked at the fire.

"So...."

"Oh Hannibal, where are you?"

Hannibal froze.

"I...."

Will looked around and spotted a woman walking through the crowd. he quickly grabbed Hannibal's hand, pulling and the two of them ran for the stairs. He resisted the urge to laugh as they ran and went right to his room opening with his keycard. They ran inside, shutting it, and leaned against the door panting for breath.

They looked at each other, still breathing heavy, and before Will could even second guess himself, he kissed him. It was a messy kiss, years of not kissing at all making him rusty, but he grabbed Hannibal's tie pulling him toward the bed where they both fell back. Neither of them said a word as they pulled off clothes, and before long Will was stroking a stranger's cock, staring into crimson eyes, and groaning as Hannibal pulled back to take him into his mouth. He pulled his hair hard, making Hannibal groan, and came with a shout feeling like he'd run a marathon. Hannibal crawled closer, and Will reached for him, stroking fast, and they kissed again just as he came in Will's palm.

Both of them tried to catch their breaths after, staring into each other's eyes, and burst out laughing as they laid there.

"So," Will said, smiling, "That happened."

"Yes, it did."

"It was...."

"Amazing."

"Yeah," Will said, kissing him again, "It was pretty great."

Hannibal took Will's hand, licking his own mess from Will's palm, and Will sighed.

"Would you be averse to...doing it again?"

Will shook his head. "No?"

Hannibal kissed his cheek. "I'm glad to hear it. May I stay?"

"Stay," Will said, still smiling, "Stay."

Hannibal smiled, touching his cheek. "I will, though I think we need a shower. Lest we fell asleep messily."

Will nodded. "Ok."

The shower as fast, and somehow Will found himself on his knees sucking off a stranger even as Hannibal struggled to come a second time, and after Hannibal kissed him so much he was dizzy with it.

He collapsed first but Hannibal hugged him so tightly from behind he could hardly keep his eyes open.

"Breakfast?" he mumbled, "In the morning?"

"Any requests?"

Will sighed, his eyes heavy. "Other than you?"

Hannibal kissed his cheek. "I will surprise you."

Will woke up to Hannibal eating him out, and covered his mouth when he came, shouting out as his orgasm was ripped from him. He moaned as Hannibal rutted against him after, not thrusting inside but the friction was so good he almost felt like he was.

He sighed loudly after, smiling up at the ceiling, and Hannibal kissed his cheek.

"I suppose we are no longer bored now."

Will grinned at him. "No at all."

"What do you suppose we continue this for the duration of our stay? No strings, just..."

"Fun?"

"Yes."

He kissed him, touching his cheek. "Definitely yes."

"I think, perhaps, we're about to think differently about this conference."

Will laughed. "Very, very, differently. I think maybe Santa came...early...for us both."

Hannibal kissed him again. "I think so too, Will. I think so too."

Will looked into his eyes, heart skipping a beat.

"Stay? Just for another few hours?"

"We'll miss our conference meetings this morning."

"And?"

Hannibal pulled him close, and Will sighed laying his head on Hannibal's chest. "I think perhaps this a much better use of our time here."

"Me too," Will sighed, nuzzling his chest hair, "Me too.

[scarluxia]

the You fandom needs to STFU about "hating Guinevere Beck = victim blaming, WAH."

In the book, sure, she was an asshole, but she was paradoxically a better character. The show tried to make her a ✨relatable everygirl✨, but instead they made this self-absorbed, flaky, tactically inept, lying, cheating, whiny twit who couldn't find a way out of a wet paper bag. Quite frankly, trying to pass someone like her off as an "everygirl" is insulting to real women. And you know what, yeah, there ARE a lot of ways she could have avoided being unalived by Joe, and calling her out on tactical ineptitude is NOT the same as saying she """deserved""" what happened. I don't care if she did or didn't, but I WAS cheering when Love Quinn said Beck was unremarkable and mediocre.

When we first met Beck, she showed some signs of intelligence and likability that sadly didn't last past a couple episodes. She had a steady job, was working her ass off, showed some serious balls to the professor who was acting inappropriately towards her, and it was easy to root for her. When Joe started stalking her and acting like he was the lead in a romantic comedy, yeah the show did a good job of pointing out how those types of comedies can influence toxic behavior on impressionable minds.

but dear GOD that girl was so up her own ass! I do feel like Joe genuinely tried to help her at some points, sure for selfish reasons, but I honestly don't care about those. He kept house for her, cooked for her, threw her this gorgeous theme party and baked her a really thoughtful cake. He even vouched for her and got her a job at his place of work, which she couldn't even BOTHER to attempt to do properly. It's understandable that she would need SOME time off from doing anything to mourn her friend's death, but I genuinely don't think that's what was going on there. I think she was being a flake and grasping for anything to use as an excuse to avoid taking responsibility. She didn't get her worked turned in on time for the lady professor even though Blythe did EVERYTHING in her power to help her (side note: "the most analog princess in the land" would use a pen and paper, NOT A TYPEWRITER). This chick just didn't want to be helped and I cannot overemphasize how much I HATE that type. A lot of her problems were her own damn fault because play stupid games = win stupid prizes.

Was Joe a dumbass for aliven't-ing people close to her? Yes; she would realistically be considered a suspect, and don't even get me started on him TAKING A CALL WHILE TRYING TO HIDE A BODY. (They're both tactically inept but I can rant about Joe in another post.) But up to a point he did care about her, and I believe he did trust her to a degree and she betrayed that trust.

Now, sleeping with her therapist HAHAHAHAHA okay MAYBE he took advantage of her because blah blah blah position of power blah blah (although another fandom I'm in has probably warped my view regarding that). But she didn't even have the grace to act ashamed or even try to pin it on him for taking advantage of her. That makes me think she CHOSE to cheat on Joe. And if memory serves, this was right after she'd gotten back WITH Joe after helping him cheat on Karen. He was 100% correct to suspect her. Now, following her to verify it, that's a moral grey area (hey, the internet remembers what those are, right?), but she was WAY more concerned that he was """following""" her than the fact that SHE was doing something that hurt him and got caught doing it. (And I'm not absolving him of responsibility; he fucked up, too, a lot, but again, that's for another post.)

Why the FUCK did she feel the need to go snooping in the ceiling after she was so freaked out about him following her (aka invading her ✨privacy, wah✨)? When you snoop, you might find things you don't like. It's an occupational hazard of being FUCKING NOSY. (I would know! 😃 )

Her reaction to what was in the box was... average. Can't fault her for that. But the way she HANDLED IT OMG. Like... What Joe was doing was absolutely not normal, but she should have KNOWN hey, this guy is fucking obsessive and crazy at this point! Maybe being fidgety and super obvious about trying to get away, and ALERTING HIM TO THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TRYING TO GET AWAY, IS A STUPID IDEA!!! Literally she could have just said, "Hey... I'm SO sorry but I accidentally broke your jar. I promise I'll buy you another one. In fact, we can go shopping now if you want." & then give him the slip at the store using the ladies' room or whatever. Now with that  being said, no, she didn't """deserve""" to be knocked out and wake up in a cage, but I'm not sure how the fuck she expected her super obvious attempt to leave (when he was SURE to discover what happened) would work in her favor. Dumbass!

Waking up in the cage. Okay, here's where my personal tactics diverge from what's considered a "normal reaction". I actually pitched a "wake up in a cage" plot to a friend to use with our frenemy characters. Maybe this shows a lack of diversity on my part, but I'm pretty sure EVERY single one of my characters would have the sense to pretend it's a romantic vacation. She clearly knew that's how he wanted to be perceived. Failing that, she could have played dumb (I'm not sure why that was hard for her since she legit IS DUMB).

"Joe? Honey? Uh... what's going on? Did you bring the pancakes?"

or

"Hey, I'm sorry I broke your jar, but don't you think this is an overreaction?"

or literally something else innocuous like that.

Playing into his desire to hear what he wanted-- FUCKING EVENTUALLY, IT TOOK HER GODDAMN LONG ENOUGH-- was a smart move, but she overplayed her hand and screaming at him about being a """psycho""" or whatever 🙄🙄🙄 probably just motivated him to deathify her faster because obviously he'd get defensive & be in denial about that shit. Calling a psycho a psycho rarely works out in your favor just FYI.

Pretty sure she had him knocked out at one point, so like... she could have Removed him as a Threat permanently but she didn't and that was also a tactical error on her part. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS make sure you finish a job like that if you think your life is at risk.

Anyway it's like 3:00 a.m. and I'm rambling about a show I honestly loved at first, but GOD!!! BECK IS THE WORST JOE GIRL IN THE SHOW. Book Beck at least had some COMMON FUCKING SENSE and she had a better chance at surviving her captivity. It actually made me SAD that Book Beck didn't, but Show Beck I was just fuckin rooting for Joe to pest control her ass already.

 (Marienne is my favorite but ONLY after I saw her showing some serious fortitude in season 4.) I adored Love the first time I saw season 2 but then the second time it was like ehhhhh being the whiny brand of manipulative was really unnecessary, and good GOD did the writers lose track of her character in season 3! I don't even know if 2 Love and 3 Love were the same PERSON! And, no, you can't put all those fuckin changes on post-partum.  Post-partum affects aspects of your mood and behavior; it does NOT change your entire fucking personality. I miss the fun, carefree, obsessive but adorable about it Love from like the first few episodes of season 2 before the whinging and mind games set in. And, seriously? They didn't need to make her first husband's demise not-an-accident. I was fine with thinking he died from illness, but learning retroactively about her paralyzing a MUTE MAN WHO USES HIS HANDS TO TALK just felt... weird. Also how the FUCK did Ms. "LA runs deep in these veins" make friends with someone like Sherry and cut out Sunshine, Sunshine's wife forget-her-name, and GABE???? Should be fuckin criminal. I think those three kept her grounded.

And the Season 4 girl was... ehhh she gave him useful resources and took his crazy in stride, but idk she's otherwise forgettable. I don't even remember her name (nor can I be assed to look it up). I think it might have been Kate, but don't quote me on that. I didn't like her overall personality.

And yeah I'm bitching about a LOT of the women in the show, so let's name some ladies I liked.

- Blythe. Super pretentious but in similar ways to me, and she's cultured and intelligent enough to get away with it. Also she DID do her utmost to help Beck, and her romance with Ethan is completely adorable.

- Peach to a degree. Her actress is hot, and while she wanted to keep Beck as a pet, she was also pretty generous about helping her. Her love for Beck was equally as obsessive as Joe's, but you know what? She knew Beck longer and in addition to being a closeted lesbian, she struck me as borderline with some of her reactions to things, and that's GENUINELY relatable, not "teehee tv execs think this is relatable!"

- ANNIKA. Annika is the absolute best girl in season 1. I adore her and I'm glad she survived. I wish we'd seen more of her because omg her personality was absolutely perfect.

- Sunrise, completely adorable, sweet, and supportive.

- Ellie's a kid, but for the most part she had her shit handled. Her bratty teenage moments were entirely realistic and didn't detract from her characterization at all.

- like I said, I adored Love at first... until she started treating Joe like everything he did was wrong.

- trying to think of any girls I liked from season 3 and coming up completely blank. I did enjoy a few of the male characters and one of the actors who plays my favorite Canon Love Interest in another show was in it. Season 3 Marienne was pretty meh, but I don't think I hated her or anything.

- in season 4 OH MY GOODNESS Phoebe! Phoebe is everything! I'm SO GLAD she survived!!!

- Nadia was okay. She's so close to Ellie's age that the way Joe treated her was pretty shocking to me 😕 I guess once they're 18+ they're fair game.

- And like I said, Marienne won major points with me for her strength and resilience.

Anyway this has been my late night/early morning rant about why Beck made terrible decisions. And again let me stress - I don't think she DESERVED to be tortured or exterminatus'd. I do, however, think Joe's reactions to her behavior were 100% realistic.

[beesflowers]

𝓔𝓲𝓶𝓲 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓿𝓪𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓻𝓼

Characters: Eimi Ochida, Haruka Kiritani, Mafuyu Asahina, Emu Otori, Shiho Hinomori

Type: headcanons, fluff

Note: Just realized I didn't made any hcs of lovers for Eimi- Also she's not cannonically shipped by me with anyone so feel free to take your pick or maybe even suggest someone!

Haruka Kiritani

Their relationship would be most likely through idol career since that's mostly how they met in the first place... I mean... it's technically perfect but at the same time very risky! Eimi can't let it show too much to not loose her job and Haruka can't let it show because it'll go all around the internet in just a second!

As for their match... they're both rather calm and hardworking but also caring for others! So I just feel like they'd watch out after each other to make sure none of them is overworking themselves. They're also really quiet and rarely affectionate couple but actually really sweet!

"Haruka, you've been working out for 2 hours straight... let's take a break now, I'll give you a massage."

"Was it this long? Wel... alright. Even if I decline, I know you'll be persistant..."

"Ah- I'm sorry... I simply care about you. So I'd say it'd be the best if you stop for now or even today and we could get some comfort food after the massage?"

"Then best to order it! I didn't took my disguise with me today..."

Mafuyu Asahina

This choice might be surprising for some and I'm gonna spoil some backstory here but I want to give accurate hcs so! but both of the girls actually have bad relationship with their parents. Eimi is just noticing they're actually bad while Mafuyu stays slightly oblivious to that fact so far. And while purple haired girl can get emotionless in a second and actually shows her true self, green haired girl has small problem with that... untill she got into relationship with Mafuyu! She began trusting her and now just she knows her worries~

As for their relationship... they're helping each other in different ways! Eimi offers her girlfriend a place to stay when she decides to run off or have a break, while Mafuyu let's her lover get her emotions out into her shoulders and give her advices, and speak words she needed to hear.

"So, are you running away for good or did you made sleepover excuse again?"

"Sleepover."

"Fair enough. I'm happy to have you around then~"

Emu Otori

Chaotic ray of sunshine and her calm girlfriend who get's her out of trouble... that's relationship between them! But they're so different... you may ask yourself, how did they even got together? Well... Eimi fell for pink haired girl's childishness and how she can always brighten the mood! While Emu fell for green haired girl's ability of never being tired from her ideas and always indulging in them, thinking of better solution instead of straight up rejecting them, it showed she cares!

Plus, Emu doesn't need to worry about her family accepting Eimi, since she's naturally pretty formal and from rich family so she knows how to make good first impression. In fact, they may've even trusted their youngest sister when her girlfriend's around!

"Won... Wonderhoy, Eimi! Gues what I got for us today!!"

Wonderhoy, Emu~ Well... I'd guess it has something to do with the taiyaki you're hiding behind your back?"

"AH- How did you know?!! But yes! I wanted to have super fun date with you before show starts!"

Shiho Hinomori

Similiar with first pairing... both have actually rather similiar personalities! Not as much, but still rather similiar... except! Eimi is usually gentle with her remarks and suggestions, while Shiho can be considered a bit cold sometimes... but that never was a problem to green haired girl! In fact, she liked how she didn't hid anything nad spoke her mind out. As for gray haired girl... she liked dedication of the other girl towards her profession and the perfect advices she always gave.

And their relationship... both usually settle on quieter date's, when both can work on their stuff usually handholding or Eimi having her hand on her lover's lap if she's playing on bass. The manager is also working free for Leo/need since she can't help but help with their grow when she sees them and her girlfriend so motivated!

"Hm hm hm hm~♪"

"Peaky Peaky?"

"Yeah... but how did you know? I played it once to you and in it's demo..."

"I tend to remember your songs~"

[pattxnsanders]

Hey! Just so you know leo-roleplays2 is a very very very problematic figure called The Trojan Collective in the TSS community. They’ve sexualized minors, been predatory towards minors, and even Thomas himself has condemned their actions. Here’s a link to a callout post + screenshots: https://www.tumblr.com/menacing-manicotti/731983747033022464/and-thomas-sanders-himself-has-addressed-the

If you scroll through that blog, there’s dozens of screenshots and stuff. I also unknowingly interacted with them, and I wanted to let you make an informed decision to continue speaking with them.

Thank you so much for the information. I spent a long time looking through things, and I am making an informed decision to stop rping with them from now on.

While I will not link pictures (there is not much that I can say personally about them, and if people who are more up-to-date on the situation want to talk to me about my experiences, feel free to send a dm), there was some odd behavior I noticed with them.

I am much older than most people would think rpers are (22), so I was thankfully able to avoid nsfw with them, as most of the problems seem to involve that. But there was a pattern of not owning up to situations, expecting more than they gave, and being uncomfortable in situations I tried to compromise/work with. I had to set a hard boundary with them, explaining that I couldn't rp if they were going to continue to expect me to be the consistent caretaker. I offered several solutions, and while some were accepted, they were obviously unhappy about it.

I am incredibly grateful for whoever sent this. While I usually ignore a lot of small drama things, after actually looking at all the evidence, and the testimonies, I feel like this is something real.

Also, for the sake of clarity: I never, and will never, condone abusive behavior to others. People are people, not your playthings or extensions to your own world that you can use however you'd want to. If your jokes were really jokes, people would know, and people would laugh. Hiding behind excuses and lies and fake names is only going to hurt you, in the end.

And, if Trojan sees this, know I hold no malice for you when I say: you need help. Please find a real therapist (even a school councilor if you have to), and talk to someone who will help you. I know what it's like to be in a bad situation, and to want to lash out at the world and explore the darkness of your experiences. I've been there. I've written dark fic, done dark rps, and, frankly, been not the best to some of my friends in the past.

But if you choose to, genuinely let yourself be willing and open to change, you can learn and grow from it. And when you do, people will see, and though you might not get a congratulations, you will feel better and it will not matter. So please seek whatever help you can. Please take care of yourself and stop relying on others to do it for you. Please take a moment to get off the internet and enjoy your life while you still have one, because it's obviously hurting you and putting you in a bad place. Please get help.

[lindgaardbojsen02]

How To Repair "Actxprxy" Dll Errors On Your Hard Disk

The Internet consists of a large network of powerful computers all throughout the country that are permanently connected together. These computers usually stored in special buildings with incredibly own power supply to sure they can operate continually. iexplorer Activation Key of the Internet is stored on these computers, which are called contains. Is it possible to repair glitches for internet explorer 7? Yes, you can theoretically repair the program when iExplorer it is going to its bizarre little topics. Microsoft actually takes the position there is not wrong with Explorer five. Instead, the company says the thing lies with the the site. They are not designed towards specifications of Explorer 7 or the actual excuse turns out. Apparently, Microsoft expects the regarding websites within the market to redesign themselves on the Explorer 7 specs. Good luck with which in turn. Let us now the look at a few important plug-ins for Web browser. Obviously, some common plug-ins like The search engines toolbar are not explained. Below listed is really a few less popular ones, nonetheless can be important to many users. Plug-ins can join in lot of things for you, beginning with killing unwanted ads, to securing web access. Both them is free of charge of cost, but you will need to download the right plug-ins for that right IE versions. While Ie 8 has always felt faster than Firefox, Ie 9 feels closer in speed and responsiveness to Google Chrome than issues. But for on the subject of its innovations to work properly, it the interface and the backing of Windows 7th. If you were aiming to get it to work with Windows XP, you'll be getting to discouraged that Internet explorer download, because it isn't supported on Experience. So, what problems are you having? Allow me to guess. Sites you visited all frequently with Ie 6 don't load? As well as run into the joyous moment when Explorer 7 freezes when you try to tab between url pages? Advanced users find it particularly momentous when Explorer conflicts with updates to sub-programs being made available from MICROSOFT! Lovely. Just lovely. People often think that Internet Explorer has been the dominant web browser since the golden time of the internet began. Well for an especially long time now usual indeed been the most frantic browser including times been almost totally unrivalled. He did this mainly an effect of it being packaged free with Microsoft Windows, in what some would later call a brutal monopolisation attempt by Microsoft windows. The last year or two however have heralded the arrival of new, possibly superior browsers. Mozilla's Firefox been recently particularly successful at chipping away at Explorers market dominance. So where did all of it begin, exactly why were Microsoft ever in order to have double market dominance? Special software was designed to address the issues listed above - NetConceal Anonymizer, it keeps you free from manual proxy server checking, SOCKS configuration and supports ALL software program. Actually, a few clicks to hide IP address and become anonymous. I can't see my dropdown effects or links using IE7, but everything works fine your newest versions of Firefox, Opera and Netscape. Does anyone have got suggestions or work arounds for this issue?

[belphies-cuhm-sluht]

hello amazing talented writer!!!! i believe ur requests are open right now (if they aren't pls ignore this) !! i was wondering if you could do head cannons for the obey me brothers with an mc who really wanted to show them how much they loved them, so they give them the biggest bear hug possible and keep telling them how much they appreciate them? idk if there is a character limit, so of you want to include the dateables that would be marvelous! thank you for having such an amazing blog and working so hard 💖😌

Brothers with a Lovebug GN!MC (Headcanons)

A/N : This was so cute! So cute! I loved writing it! All the brothers deserve love and appreciation. Thank you so much for requesting it and thank you thank you thank you for your kind words, I appreciate them and I appreciate you <3

Lucifer

He wasn’t completely touch starved, well.. Not anymore since he met you, but hugs still kind of threw him off sometimes. He just wasn’t used to it, no matter how many times you hugged him, although he did love the feelings.

When you came up to him and hugged him this time, it was different than most of the other hugs, it was tight and warm, and it was almost as if he could feel all of your love for him pouring out in this one single hug and… well… he loved it. He loved the feeling of it. It made him feel warm, it was… strange but endearing. But then you started telling him how much you appreciate him, and while he already was aware that you did (that’s just him being prideful though), he loved hearing it from your lips. It was enough to actually make him smile, and he was so wrapped up in the warmth that your words and his touch made him feel that he almost forgot to hug you back… almost.

His arms snaked around you, holding you closer against him. He didn’t want to lose the warm feeling that you gave him, he didn’t want to let you go.

“Thank you, dear. Please, don’t hesitate to… do this more often.”

Mammon

If there was anyone who deserved this, it was him. He’s so under appreciated in the house, he’s always getting picked on, the guy can never seem to catch a break. The only time he actually feels like he’s noticed for the good things that he does is when he’s with you, hence why he’s always following you around and trying to be as close to you as possible. He just really needs it.

The bear hug was, needless to say, very unexpected for him. Sure, he’s used to being hugged by you, and yes, he loves being hugged by you… But this hug was amazing to him. It was tight, and it wasn’t just any regular hug, it was like you were holding onto him, and this may have just become his preferred method of hugs. These kinds of hugs are by far the best hugs to get. He almost couldn’t focus on what you were saying until he realized that you were telling him that you appreciate him… and… wow. That was the only thing he could think when he heard you, and it didn’t seem like you were anywhere close to being done.

He held you tighter, resting his head on top of yours, and yes, he did start crying although he’s going to deny that he is… just don’t bring it up.

“That’s really sweet of ya, babe… And I ain’t cryin’... yer hair jus’ got in my eye… tell me more?”

Leviathan

He is very touch starved, and although people around the house appreciate him, he’s always down on himself anyway. He’s always down on himself, and even when you are there to tell him why you love him, his thoughts are just very pessimistic. He needs this just as much as Mammon does.

The sound he made when you first wrapped your arms around him was a mix between a scream and a squeal. He definitely wasn’t expecting it, but he wasn’t against it either. He didn’t know that he needed it until it was already happening, but he really appreciates the hug. When you started telling him that you appreciate him and how much you appreciate him, his face turned the brightest shade of red. It was strange to him because he didn’t really know that he did that much for you to even appreciate, but he really liked hearing you say it. At least he knows that he’s doing something right and that he’s making you happy.

He’s so happy, it’s off the charts, and he doesn’t want the hug to end, ever. It’s the best feeling in the world to be appreciated.

“I-I’m… Thank you… Y-You’re the best… Really… I-I appreciate you too…”

Satan

Being loved and appreciated never seemed important to him before. These were things he could live without, he was thriving off of being hateful and unappreciative towards Lucifer. Deep down though, even if he didn’t ever want to admit it, acknowledge it, or even know about it… He needed these things.

He heard you coming. Let’s be fair, this man memorized the sounds of footsteps of everyone in the house so he can act accordingly based on whoever was even coming close to his room. He was ready for you to come in, the smile already on his face, his book already set down to welcome you with open arms. What he wasn’t ready for was the bear hug that you rushed in to give him. He was not ready at all, but damn if he didn’t love it. He loved hearing your words of appreciation too, and he was going to memorize every single thing that you said, just so he could think about it later.

He really did need this, as someone who mainly only ever feels wrath, hatred, annoyance… You’re the only thing that really brings him pure happiness.

“You’re making me soft, kitten… Not that I mind it. I’ve got all the time in the world to keep doing this.”

Asmodeus

The complete opposite of Satan, love and appreciation are so very important to him. But, he receives these things all the time from strangers, and sometimes, well, most times, it never feels genuine. These things have lost almost all of their meanings to him, it almost seemed pointless because of how repetitive it’s become.

There was something different receiving love and appreciation from you though. It was real, there was emotion behind it, something that could never be picked up or trusted over the internet through random comments. Of course he loved the hug, the tighter, the closer the better. He wasn’t actually… used to getting hugs like that. It felt special to him, and when the words of appreciation came, he felt special. Being loved by the entire Devildom will never feel as good as being loved by you. You made him feel like more than just his avatar, and that means so much more to him than looks or likes.

Yes he cried, and no he didn’t try to hide it. He wasn’t ashamed of his emotions, and he wanted you to know that what you said made him feel good enough that he actually cried.

“Oh… You’re… I’m gonna mess up my face but… It’s okay. You’re so sweet, I could just kiss you, darling.”

Beelzebub

He knows what love is, because he loves you and he loves all of his brothers. He knows what appreciation is because he appreciates you, and appreciates everything that his brothers do for him. He’s pretty sure that his brothers love and appreciate him back, and he knows without a doubt that you love and appreciate him… especially after the hug.

The hug, which was nice, and really cute to him. He was always the one giving you the bear hugs, so to be on the receiving end felt really nice. It’s not something that he’s used to, but his eyes, his entire face even, it lit up. Being told that he’s appreciated though, it’s way different from just feeling appreciated. Those words meant so much to him, he probably won’t be able to stop smiling about it for weeks. He’ll probably tell all of his brothers about it too, well, not even probably, he’s definitely going to tell all of his brothers about it. This is a really big thing to him.

He’s just so happy, beyond happy, ecstatic even. He loves and appreciates you so much, and feeling that same amount of love and appreciation returned, it’s amazing, it feels like he just won a football game.

“I’m happy you feel the same way, honey… You’re really special to me… I love you.”

Belphegor

He puts on a big front that he doesn’t care if anyone loves him or appreciates him, but he just doesn’t want to be seen as weak, and feelings to him are a sign of vulnerability. Plus, those feelings just make attachments stronger and if something bad were to happen, it’ll be harder for him to move on and get over it.

Hugs were weird enough to him, so bear hugs weren’t any less weird, it caught him off guard. He just stood there for a second before finally relaxing in your arms. He loved you, and while he didn’t say it as much as he probably should, he realized that sometimes words weren’t needed to get that feeling across. He could feel all of your love through that hug, and it made him feel… good. When you started telling him you appreciate him… and just how much you appreciate him… that was shocking. He didn’t know what you could possibly be appreciative of considering everything that’s happened and how he was towards you. He’s always felt like a fuck up, like everything bad that’s ever happened was his fault, so to hear that he’s appreciated was strange, he almost couldn’t wrap his head around it.

He wasn’t going to cry, not in front of you, but he definitely felt like he was about to. He’s gotta make an excuse to get you out of the room long enough to get the sniffles out without you noticing.

“You’re such a dork… Go get your pillows and blankets from your room. I want to cuddle with you.”

[krystalites]

wayv members reacting to you pecking their lips to shut them up

anon requested: kk! First ask on the way~ WayV reaction to their s/o pecking their lips while they talk to shut them up?

genre: crack (?), tiny bit angst, fluff, soft members

word count: 1,6k

a/n: I would like to apologize for probably making you wait for so long. I never actually got the notification and for some reason I never checked my inbox.. Also, my first reaction ever! Yay! I hope you guys like this since English is not my first-language, and I'm still learning. Enjoy!

⌜ kun ⌟

"and them not listening to me just annoyed me more-"

Kun had been ranting about his members for what felt like forever now. No offense to him, you loved hearing his angelic voice and could listen to it for hours but you had been very boyfriend starved lately. All you wanted to do was to cuddle your adorable boyfriend. Though, you just let him rant because you knew he needed it sometimes. He kept talking for a bit more and it went actually well. But all of sudden, you just felt like you couldn't wait anymore.

"So I snapped and-"

Kun's eyes widened as you cupped his face and pecked his lips. He smiled when you pulled away and wrapped his arms around your face, nuzzling his head in the crook of your neck. He placed a gentle, barely-there kiss on your neck. He inhaled your scent heavily, taking as much as he can. Kun lived for moments like this and they were his favorites out of all the moments he shared with you.

"You could've told me you were bored!" he scolded you jokingly.

⌜ ten ⌟

You really thought it would be a great idea to cook with your boyfriend but all he did was sitting on the counter as you did all the job. He was making these weird vegetable puns he found on the internet. Even though they were funny, you had been listening to this for almost an hour now.

"Hey, babe?" Oh, you heard this kind of babe before. The kind of babe he uses to tease you.

"No puns Chi, no puns." To give a threatening aura, you slowly raised the wooden spoon that you were using to stir the haricot beans in the pot. Ten chuckled and put his hands up as if he was surrendering.

"I swear it's not a pun." You could sense the mischievous tone in his voice, yet you decided to ignore it.

"I just wanted to say that you’re a wonderful human bean-" His joke was cut off by your lips on his. When you quickly pulled away and continued stirring, he smiled at himself. He was feeling something that he felt for the first time in his life. He sure kept making puns just so you could keep shutting him up with your lips.

⌜ winwin ⌟

Sicheng was very excited about WayV's comeback. He had been talking about the M/V, the outfits, the choreography, the song for days. Right now, you were in the living room, as he kept talking about the comeback while you were trying to get his attention. You kept cutting his words off but he never actually heard you, despite sitting right in front of you.

"-oh and the choreography is so cool! It matches the whole aesthetic perfectly."

"Sicheng I broke your favorite mug."

"The outfits are kind of revealing but I wanna step out of my comfort zone so I really like them!"

"I burned the stuff in our memory box."

"Everyone else looks very good too!"

"Sicheng I'm breaking up with you."

That's it, you thought.

"They wanna dye my hair but I don't know if I want my hair to be dyed-" He was cut off by your lips, which were gone barely a second later. Sicheng opened and closed his mouth a few times, obviously wanting to say something but not being able to say it.

"I think I got a bit too excited," he finally managed to say and mumbled, "Can I get another one though?"

⌜ lucas ⌟

You rubbed your eyes and leaned over to your phone resting on your nightstand. With a little click on the power button and the overly bright screen, you read 02.38 am. Yukhei was obviously still in-game with the dreamies, as you could hear him yelling in the room right next to you. With a groan, you got up and slipped your shirt on. You were sleeping topless since it was summer and very hot, but his camera could be on when you entered the room. You walked to his room, not even bothering to knock since his door was wide open. If you're going to yell at two in the morning, at least shut the door you thought. Entering the room, you saw Yukhei furiously clicking on his mouse and keyboard. You walked up to him as he kept yelling at the dreamies over his microphone.

"Donghyuck he's right on your le-" He suddenly stopped clicking, trying to process what the hell just happened. You had bent his head backward and pecked his lips, then left casually as if you didn't just cause him to blush. He quickly gathered his thoughts and mumbled a quick excuse and apology to the dreamies. Turning his computer off and running to your shared room, all he could do was thinking of you two cuddling and kissing, giggling like a high school girl at the thought of that.

⌜ xiaojun ⌟

You and Xiaojun started dating a few weeks ago, so your relationship was still very fresh. Being an idol and living with 6 other males sure gave him a lot to talk about. His talkative nature didn't really help with that. You guys were on another date, at your house. You were making popcorn for your movie night since you guys couldn't go out risking Xiaojun's career just like that. Xiaojun was helping you by preparing some drinks he saw on YouTube a few days ago.

"Then Ten threw his slipper to Yukhei for calling him a garden dwarf!" You laughed and glanced at him. He looked so happy telling you about the guys. As if he was telling you about his family, which you were sure it was at this point. You were having a great time, but Xiaojun had a curfew that he was supposed to not pass. Even though you knew it wasn't intentional, he kept talking and stopping what he was doing to show you what happened with his gestures. You thought maybe if you waited 10 minutes, he would just stop. But of course, he didn't. After thinking of a nice way to cut him off, you finally thought of something.

"Ten chased Yukhei around the dorm like tha-" You pecked his lips, pulled away, and smiled.

"I love hearing you talk Junnie, but I really want to watch this movie before your curfew ends."

He snapped out of the little shock state he was in and quickly began to stir the drinks, which he was supposed to do 10 minutes ago. While stirring, he giggled and shook his head. The fact that the first kiss you two shared being an 'i will kiss you to shut you up' kind of kiss made his heart do backflips and it definitely was something he could never forget.

⌜ hendery ⌟

Hendery was teasing you for losing a game of Mario Kart. Pretty normal, right? Yeah, if only that didn't happen two days ago. This was his third day of endlessly teasing you. At first, you laughed it off. He rarely ever beat you, so you didn't want to pop his happy bubble. It's the third day, and you were visibly annoyed. You sometimes beat him at the stuff he's very great too, but you never actually took it this far.

You guys were sitting in the living room, just chilling while you watched some weird tv show, where the contestants were married couples and competed for a car. A couple you had been supporting was a few points ahead, whereas Hendery's team was losing. He sighed and faked a pout.

"They're losing like you playing Mario Kart." after his comment, he smirked and turned to you. "Get it? Cause you lo-"

Eyes wide, blinking rapidly he was looking at you. You went back to watching the show like you didn't just smash your lips against his harshly. He gulped and quickly turned to tv, pulling his hood up to hide the furious blush making its way up to his ears from his neck and face.

⌜ yangyang ⌟

"Yang, please don't cry... It breaks my heart to see you like this." You put your hand on his cheek but he harshly tugged it away.

"No! They're right. I'm useless. I can't believe I actually called myself an idol on that interview just before my voice cracked when they asked me to sing. I couldn't even dance properly to the song they gave me! My manager had every right to call me names!"

You shook your head and cupped his face, making him look at your face with his glossy eyes and red nose. He was so innocent, so pure and those 'managers' were doing nothing but ruining his confidence. Weren't they supposed to help them improve and keep them motivated? Then what was all of this?

"Yang, don't say stuff like that about yourself ever again. You are the most talented person I've ever known. Every artist, scratch that, every human has a bad day where their body doesn't feel like dancing or singing or doing something in general. You can't blame yourself because of that. What actually matters is you holding your head up high and showing them what you've got in there. You always have other performances to prove yourself.

But, that didn't seem to work on your beautiful boyfriend. He just shook his head side to side, mumbling little "no's"

"No, I should just go back to where I came from the way they told me t-" Not letting him finish that sentence, you put your lips on his. You two stood like that until you ran out of breath, eyes closed with his hands over yours that were cupping his face. When you pulled away, he let a few tears spill. Wiping them off with the back of his hands, he just pushed you on your back on the bed you were sitting on. He rested his head on your stomach and tried to fall asleep with his eyes closed. Even though you guys didn't talk about it, you knew he was feeling better about himself. And he did. He had you on his side, after all.

[hangovercurse]

I’d Drop it All for You

Pictures of you and Pete are spread all over the internet, causing a whirlwind of hate to enter your social media.

Request: “Pete content please! anything !!! smut fluff whatever”

Pete x Reader

Warnings: Cursing, depictions of depression and anxiety

A/N: *Insert normal spiel about respecting A.G. and only using her for plot purposes. No harm intended.* Also I wrote most of this after a meeting with my therapist so... enjoy :) (He’s so cute in this gif I wanna kiss his face)

Word Count: 1820

You weren’t one of those people who loved being the center of attention. You knew that being in the spotlight also meant constantly living under a microscope, and you decided a long time ago that that was not for you.

But you were lucky enough to work as an assistant art director at just 24. You were hoping that The King of Staten Island, your newest project, would help get your name out into the professional world. But that wasn’t the only thing to come out of the film.

It happened unexpectedly, you showed up on set the first day, ready to do whatever the art director required of you. You couldn’t help but be slightly distracted by the lead actor and writer, Pete Davidson. He was so kind and funny, and he wasn’t uptight like everyone else.

After a few hours of filming, he came up to you, introducing himself. He said he “wanted to get to know everyone working on the project,” but you didn’t see him introducing himself to anyone else. You two started talking during breaks. Then he started sitting with you at lunch. Then he was asking for your number.

In a matter of weeks he was asking you out to dinner, taking you to a cozy restaurant that you absolutely adored. He walked you home, his hand grazing yours until you intertwined your fingers.

It was all very romantic, so when Pete asked if he could take you on another, you obviously said yes. Flash forward two weeks and he finally got the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend, even though you were both exclusively seeing each other already.

After filming ended 2 months later, you were still working on the film in post, which meant you had an excuse to stay  in Staten Island with Pete. After about 2 weeks in post, you spent more nights in his bed than your hotel’s.

Nearly 6 months later and you were happier than ever. You were splitting your time between your small apartment in the Bronx and Pete’s basement apartment. Pete introduced you to most of his friends, and you introduced him to yours.

But other than your small circles of friends, you kept your relationship fairly quiet. Pete doesn’t have social media and yours is strictly professional, so there are no pictures of you two together. You weren’t hiding each other, you loved each other, you just had no reason to tell tabloids. And you were perfectly happy with that.

Which made it so much worse when various news sites had pictures of you two holding hands. Had they been anyone else you would’ve thought they were cute, walking along the South Beach oceanside at night.

Pete had been in the SNL studio all day when the pictures were released, while you were in his apartment, trying your best to focus on the photoset in front of you. The production team wanted the film to scream “teen romance,” which basically entails subtle pink undertones and a higher saturation. But you couldn’t quite get the coloring right, probably because you weren’t actually focusing on the colors.

You sighed, looking at the time and realizing that Pete won’t be back until sometime after 2am, which was a whole 5 hours away. You let out a huff, pushing away from the desk and making your way to Pete’s closet and searching for one of his hoodies. They always smelled like him (and weed), so it was a comfort to you.

You crashed onto the bed, finding the phone that you had tossed there a few hours earlier. Turning it on you were surprised by the number of notifications you were getting. You knew the photos had surfaced but you weren’t expecting this.

Your Instagram was blowing up with new follows, likes, and comments. It was kind of exciting at first until you started reading some of the comments.

I mean, we knew he would downgrade from Ari, but this is like… really far down.

This girl really thinks she’s special just bc Pete’s dating her. Hun he could do so much better

Who is she?!? Literally no one.

Someone needs to show her how to dress

That hairstyle is not it honey

Pete Davidson is dating YOU??? He could do sooo much better

Ari was prettier sorry not sorry

The entire comment section on your last post, a picture of you on the set of your latest film, was pretty much the same. There were some nice comments, but a lot of mean ones.

And you couldn’t help it, you couldn’t stop looking at them. It felt so cliché, but it was like all of your deepest insecurities about being with Pete were thrown out on the table.

You knew that Pete had a fairly large following, and that a lot of people had really strong feelings about him. You had expected that if and when your relationship went public you would have a lot of people watching you, scrutinizing you. But you didn’t care because Pete was worth it.

Now you weren’t so sure. It wasn’t that you couldn’t handle people talking bad about you, because you definitely could, even if it hurt. You just weren’t expecting the amount of people comparing you to Ariana or saying that Pete could do so much better.

And it only bothered you so much because you felt it too. Your inner demons loved to remind you that Pete had dated Ariana fucking Grande and now he’s dating you. Anyone could see an obvious downgrade.

You turned your phone off and threw it on the opposite side of the bed, trying to think positive thoughts. “I am in control of my own thoughts and emotions. I am catching my negative thoughts and fixing them.” You murmured your therapist’s mantra to yourself, but it was too late. The thoughts had already taken hold of your mind.

Your eyes started to water as you could feel the heavy feeling in your chest set in. You pulled the hood over your head, pulling the straps to hide as much of your face as possible, and pulling your knees to your chest. You laid like that for a while, tears falling as doubts ran through your head. Once you had effectively exhausted your thoughts, you went numb. Your tears had stopped, but you couldn’t move. This wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, but it sure wasn’t pleasurable.

There was a sort of buzzing throughout your body, almost like the feeling when your foot falls asleep, but everywhere. It seemed to block out your sound, as you didn’t hear the basement door open. You only knew that Pete was home when he sat beside you on the bed, pulling the hood off your face.

“There’s my beautiful girl.” He smiled at you. You tried your best to fake one back, but you honestly couldn’t find the energy. Pete pulled you so you were sitting up, back pressed against his front. His arms wrapped around your middle as he pressed a kiss to your temple. “What’s goin on?” He murmured against your skin.

“Did you see them?” You asked, your voice quiet and hoarse.

Pete let out a sigh, “Yeah, I saw them.” He paused, his hold on you getting tighter, like he was making sure you couldn’t leave. “I’m sorry baby. I know you didn’t want it to be a whole big thing.”

You turned your head to face him, “It’s not that. I really don’t mind that people know. We weren’t trying to hide anything.”

He smiled, “Yeah, I know I just- it was nice having this to ourselves.”

He wanted to hide you. He’s embarrassed of you.

Your inner dialogue never seemed to shut up.

You turned away from Pete, trying to hide the tears forming in your eyes. “Yeah.” You whispered.

“What’s wrong, you’re still upset.” He rocked you in his arms, kissing the top of your head. You shrugged in response, not trusting yourself to talk. “You can talk to me, y’know.”

You nodded, leaning further into Pete’s chest. “People found my Instagram.” You murmured, looking down and tracing the arrow tattoo on his hand.

“Whaddya mean? I thought it was public?” He furrowed his eyebrows.

You sighed, wishing you hadn’t said anything. “Yeah, it is. But after all the articles people started following me and shit.”

“I would ask how that’s a problem but I deleted my Instagram so I can’t really talk.” You could tell he was trying to make you feel better, but you couldn’t seem to get out of your haze.

You shook your head, deciding to drop the matter. “It’s not, I’m just being overdramatic.” You sighed, putting on a fake smile and facing him fully. “Wanna watch a movie?” You asked, trying to change the topic.

He gave you the I-know-you’re-bullshitting-me look, which made you look down. “Something’s bothering you, Y/N. And you’re trying to pretend it doesn’t because you think your feelings aren’t valid, but they are.” He tilted his head, trying to meet your eyes that were still trained on the bedsheets below you.

“Where’d you learn that one?” You chuckled half-heartedly.

“Rehab part 2” he smiled, hand coming to your jaw to tilt your head up. “C’mon, talk to me. I wanna help.”

You huffed, moving towards the opposite side of the bed where your phone laid. You opened it, finding your Instagram, and showing him the comments. His eyebrows furrowed as he scrolled through the comments. When he decided he’d had enough he put your phone down, grabbing your waist and lifting you onto his lap so you were essentially straddling him.

He leaned his forehead against your own, your noses touching. “That’s all bullshit, you know that, right?”

You looked down, biting your lip. “Y/N you’re the most amazing, most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, okay? I’m in love with you, not anyone else.” Pete’s eyes were searching yours, trying to figure out what was going on in your head.

“I know.” You sighed, “It’s just hard to be with you and not compare myself to her. And then all these people started to do it too, and they kept saying that you could do so much better and you can. So, I dunno I guess I just kind of spiraled.”

Pete captured your lips in a long, passionate kiss. “Y/N. There is literally no better than you. I can’t do better because you are the best woman I have ever loved. “

You pulled Pete in for another kiss. “Thank you, Pete. I love you.”

“I love you too. If this happens again, I want you to call me. I don’t care what I’m doing, I’d drop it all for you.” You smiled, sitting in the arms of the guy you loved. The thoughts didn’t just magically go away, but for a brief moment in time, you were happy.

[angelictrl]

hihi wifey, im feeling kinda anxious/sad in general so can i request just have satan + asmo being jealous tysm ❤️❤️❤️

JEALOUS SATAN & ASMO.

a/n ;; sorry that this is late and i apologize if this is sucky ! head’s been empty but i’m trying desperately not to get writer’s block </3 also, asmodeus’ part got longer than expected, oops.

cw ;; threats, insecurities, hurt-ish/comfort. satan is a moody baby and asmodeus appreciation/supremacy. not proof-read. that’s all, really, besides some cranky demons. 

# satan. ``

@ others making him jealous . . .

whoever has the audacity to go and make the literal avatar of wrath jealous definitely has a death wish. whether or not some random demon who was getting too touchy, flirting, or taking up your time and attention with or without knowing that you were his partner, he’d still get pissed. 

however, he has two reactions: either, 1. he storms up to them and puts them in their place/threatens them before pulling you away if he hasn’t destroyed something, or 2. he’s just on the verge ... sitting there, peeking over a book with a menacing aura as he glares at everyone like a cat, ready to claw someone in the corner. 

satan trusts you, so if he goes with the latter, he’ll be silently raging internally while he waits for you to tell them you have a boyfriend and decline their advances. if they continue to push you when you already told them no, that’s when blondie here will snap and go with reaction 1.

“oi, just what do you think you’re doing ? my s/o already said no, you pitiful creature(s). quit gawking at them before i forcefully make you. understand?”

@ brothers making him jealous . . .

on the other hand, if it’s one of his brothers hogging all of your attention, he gets more petty than anything, really. the threats are still there, though. and especially if it’s lucifer who’s stealing you away ... yikes, everyone in HoL will know his change in mood as he’s been on lucifer’s ass more than usual with his pranks and curses.

satan will be visibly annoyed and give each and every one of you the cold shoulder by locking himself in his room more often than not (leviathan the hermit, who ?) to get lost in his books until he gets reassurance and affection from you.

he’s not really insecure, but more lost and confused than anything. he’s the brother that’s pretty much the odd one out, though none of them treat him differently, and he’s always had an issue with feeling enmeshed to lucifer. 

even when he knows he’s his own person, he was created from a quite literal ungodly amount of rage and wrath. it’s all he’s known before you came along into his life. so surely ... you’ll excuse him for looking like a kicked puppy as he tries to sort through these new feelings, right ? 

right, because you’re already there holding his hand in reassurance. that same rough hand that’s tortured and destroyed so many things is being held by someone so fragile ... someone who’s looked death in the eye ... someone who makes him feel like he’s something more than just a monster. 

you truly were just like that main character in one of his books ... you were the beauty to his beast. or, properly phrased, you brought out the beauty in his beast. 

# asmodeus. ``

@ others making him jealous . . .

‘oh, honey, you look like rumpelstiltskin, yet you still think you can compare to me ?‘ pretty much his thought process right there.

no but really, asmo may be sweet and the most gentle out of the brothers right next to beel, but he’s still an avatar of a sin. there’s no doubt that the lot of demons there in the devildom would be intimidated by asmodeus in the competition for your love - and honestly, who could blame them ?

most of them who don’t live under a rock would already know that you two are in a relationship with how much asmo posts about you, so it would take some serious devotion from any demon who dares to have the gall to compete with him - whether or not they view you as a fling - and asmodeus will not hesitate to get petty. 

you’re going to need to reassure your demon boyfriend here that you only have eyes for him before he exposes the second half of deep, dark secrets this other person/people have on the internet ^^;;

@ brothers making him jealous . . .

he’d still think of himself as somewhat superior and cuter, but he’d tone things down. he wouldn’t ruin his brothers’ lives like how he would be willing to do so with strangers.

regardless of whether or not it’s a stranger, friend, or brother of his, in the end, asmo will be extra touchy and will spoil you with more spa dates and trips to majolish than usual. this is mostly because he doesn’t want you to notice his recent gloomy change in mood as he’s stuck on the thought of ‘what if’ had you really left him for someone else. 

those intrusive thoughts just keep on swarming through his head ... so what better than to try to get back into routine with daily life ? he just hopes you haven’t taken notice, but unfortunately for him, you have. 

you’ve noticed his slightly disheveled hair and outfit along with the mountain of clothes and makeup piling up in his room and his vanity. plus, let’s not begin to even mention the excessive amount of concealer he’s been wasting to try and hide his eyebags.

things finally begin to progress in the communication area when you sit him down and confront him one night while everyone’s asleep. though, getting him to work through the root of his charismatic-party-animal mask proves to be quite difficult.

“dear, it’s adorable how you care so much for me, but you’re really going to get wrinkles this way. here, come a little closer and let me do your skincare first, then we’ll chat ... c’mon ~ i said closer, hon. i don’t bite ... well, unless you want me to ~”

“asmo, baby ...” you cut him off for the nth time that night as he tried to change the subject again, watching the demon with champagne-colored hair who flung himself at you again glance at you with his cheeky smile faltering for a split second before he quickly regained his composure, but it wasn’t anything that you couldn’t catch onto. “please, stop changing the topic. i’ve come to talk to you ... the real you. no spontaneous activities, no makeovers, just you.”

asmodeus’ face paled ever so slightly and his eye twitched as he thought of playing dumb, but you were just so sincere. he couldn’t even manage out a ‘whatever do you mean ?’ before laughing in disbelief while turning the other way. “this - this is the real ..... the real ... me ... i have no clue what you’re talking about ...” he choked out while tears glossed over his eyes, his back turned to you. 

in his theatrics and dramatic antics, he’d fake cry occasionally, but to truly feel such strong, negative emotions especially towards himself as he cried ... it was ugly. he was ugly. and now, surely if you saw his face, you’d leave him too. for he was such a shallow, ugly, good-for-nothing demon. no matter how much he polished his attitude to be sassy and charismatic or tried on the latest trending outfits and makeup, there was always this feeling of emptiness left in him. not like the black hole everyone called beel’s stomach, but this void left in his heart, this hurting in his chest that wouldn’t go away when the afterglow of each party and hookup arrived, this longing for warmth - not even just physically - for someone to hold him like he did for his brothers on their lonesome nights when they remembered the past.

the avatar of lust was knocked out of his thoughts by a pained noise, confusion written on his face before he realized it was himself. he was sobbing into your chest as you held him close, your fingers delicately carding through his tousled hair. ugly. he thought each sorrowful noise that came out of him was ugly, and he couldn’t help but chant sorry’s your way through tears. he didn’t know when you had came closer once more to hold him, but he buried his face into your shirt and finally let loose the flood of his emotions clinging desperately to you.

“p-please ... don’t go away too, s/o. you’re the true jewel of the devildom, my dear. you’re so much more beautiful than i’ll ever be ... and i ... i don’t mean that just by l-looks ... please ... i love you so much ...”

obey me masterlist.

[bumbleklee]

Hihi! I hope you dont mind this request :3 Could you do a headcannon or oneshot with zhongli, xiao, ganyu, hu tao, and a reader? I have this headcannon they’d be a family in a modern au and it’s ndjddjsjjejsehhwje Or Zhongli ‘creates’ (?) a new adepti and xiao and ganyu help raise them like a little sibling fnfnsdjjdjssj The reader would be the youngest sibling :) Hu Tao as the second youngest Xiao as the middle child Ganyu as the oldest And Zhongli as their dad <3

this is so cute im gonna cry (ღ˘⌣˘ღ) i went with a modern au bc my brain is short circuiting tonight lol. also there's chili near the end because brainrot (was listening to the song “the best day” by tswift while reading these so yktv)

it’s very sfw, just cut for length  

your mother passed away shortly after you were born, leaving you and your three siblings in the care of your father

zhongli was devastated, of course, but knew he needed to be strong for everyone

fortunately, zhongli had a well-paying job so your family never struggled

when you were a freshman in high school, ganyu was already in college so you took over her bedroom that you shared with hu tao

without ganyu around to rope you guys in, life at home was total chaos

hu tao loved to play pranks on you and xiao like putting flour in your blow dryer or turning off the internet connection when xiao was fighting a boss in his favorite video game

xiao, like most teenage boys, often retaliated and it was you who had to pull them apart from killing each other

despite the constant sibling bickering and arguing, the three of you had an unexplainable bond and zhongli’s heart melted when he came home from a rough day at work to find the three of you curled up on the couch watching a movie together

zhongli is the best dad in the entire world

he was a “cool” dad, too

he let your house be the party-house as long as everyone gave him their car keys and slept over

he actually liked looking out his bedroom window to seeing you and your friends having the time of your lives in the pool (his motto: you all deserved to have a fun childhood)

he was very comforting too and his speciality was being able to fit all four kids (teenagers) in his arms at once

if zhongli realized you were upset, he would take you out to spend the day with him, window shopping or eating at your favorite restaurant and ending the day with a snuggle in front of the tv (no matter how old you were)

one time, you and hu tao woke up to an eighteen year-old xiao wrapped up in a blanket next to zhongli on the couch

zhongli has special nicknames for all of you (ganyu is ganny, xiao is kiddo and will always be kiddo, hu tao is princess, and you’re bug)

you’re closest to hu tao

she’s two years older than you and is the only one of your siblings who doesn’t treat you like a baby all the time

she’s definitely the rebellious kid and you know all of her hiding spots for things (you would never snitch on her though)

xiao and ganyu are very protective of you

ganyu just wants you to make smart decisions while xiao threatens anyone who comes near you with a romantic interest

it was annoying at first to have such an overprotective older brother but when your very first relationship ended horribly, you were glad xiao was there to kick their ass and bring you ice cream

when ganyu comes home from college, it’s like a celebration

you and hu tao will run at her and nearly tackle her to the ground in excitement

xiao stands around usually but is always happy she’s home too

birthdays are a big deal in your home

zhongli likes to surprise everyone with “blank days until your birthday” gifts as an excuse to spoil you kids 

he lets you do whatever you want on your birthday too

if you want to go a fancy restaurant, sure. if you want to have a huge birthday party at the house, go for it. if you want to stay in your room all day, alright. his mindset is that it’s one day a year that about you and only you

zhongli is so supportive of you guys

if you’re questioning your gender or sexuality, he’ll listen to you

he’s very progressive and all he wants is for you kids to be happy

when zhongli starts dating a man named childe when you’re sixteen, everyone reacts differently

ganyu is excited, happy her dad finally met someone new after so many years of being alone

xiao is indifferent. at first he’s upset, thinking zhongli is going to forget about their mom, but once he reassures him he’s not, xiao comes around

like ganyu, you’re happy for zhongli. you like childe and you know he makes your dad happy so you’re happy

hu tao, on the other hand, is very against it

anytime zhongli tried to date someone new when she was younger, she had thrown a tantrum and cried for her mom

zhongli, not wanting to make his daughter upset, usually broke off the relationship

but now she was eighteen and she couldn’t really throw a tantrum

so when zhongli told everyone he was dating childe and hu tao ran off to the basement, the three of you followed her

you found out that had similar thoughts to xiao and thought zhongli was dating someone new to replace your mother

it took a lot of coaxing and tears but finally, hu tao came to terms with the situation

surprisingly, she had the best relationship with childe after a while

when you’re graduating high school, zhongli realizes all his babies grew up

(he suffers from empty nest syndrome)

“So, what do you think?” You grinned, watching your siblings and father admire your new dorm room. Ganyu and Hu tao exchanged looks before Ganyu nodded her head proudly. 

“Looks great,” She smiled, “It kind of looks like your bedroom at home.” 

“I thought it would look like a hurricane,” Xiao smirked, earning a playful hit on the upside of his head by his older sister. You heard her mutter an insult under her breath. 

“I think it's quite lovely, Bug,” Zhongli says softly. His hands are twisted behind his back and he won’t make eye contact with you. 

You run your hand under the waterfall lights on the wall, hundreds of photos of your family and friends clipped to the strings. Looking around, you realized you dorm was decorated like your bedroom. You had brought the same comforter and pillows from home and even set up your desk exactly the same. Maybe you weren’t so ready to let go of your childhood, either. 

Zhongli was about to open his mouth when your roommate and their parents walked into the dorm. There was a short exchange of greetings before your siblings filed into the hallway. You knew this was goodbye. 

“You can call me anytime. You know that, right?” Zhongli started, toying with your lampshade. “And if you ever feel homesick and need to-”

“I’ll be okay, dad,” You smiled softly. You embraced your father tightly and he did the same to you. After what felt like hours, but was probably not even a minute, Zhongli pulled away. He gazed you adoringly before kissing your forehead and leaving the dorm. 

Ganyu, who had taken a day off from work to be there, held out of her hand to her father. “Weird, isn’t it?” She asked comfortingly. 

“They’re all grown-up,” He mumbled, “All of my babies are grown up.” 

“Oh, dad,” Hu Tao said. She threw herself at Zhongli, catching him off guard.  “We’ll always be your babies.” 

Zhongli mustered a smile on her lips. He ruffled Hu Tao’s hair. “Yeah,” He agreed, “Let’s go eat.”

[virgosahel]

Luz Appreciation Week 2022 - Day 1: Dominican Republic Culture

Hey people, next saturday The Owl House will come back, but in the meantime, what's better than a week all dedicated to our favourite human? We'll start today with a story that explores her culture, and I hope I did a good job. I'm italian, so I had only the Great Internet to help me: if I did something wrong (or if you see any grammatical errors), please tell me.

Have fun!

A Day Like No Other

Another day had started in the Boiling Isles, and so its inhabitants were getting ready to face the countless misadventures that the magical place had in store for them.

“KID, WAKE UP!”

Well, almost everyone was getting ready.

Luz did not hear Eda, nor the banging on her door, apparently. When the Owl Lady tried for the umpteenth time to wake her up without receiving a response, she decided that her right of privacy was revoked. She pulled a picklock from her mane and leaned toward the keyhole. In a matter of seconds, the door was open.

“Ok Luz, don’t make me call Hooty to shake yo-”

She stayed on the doorstep, her hand still on the doorknob. Luz was already up and dressed, and that was the first signal that something was wrong: when she didn’t have school, the girl tended to stay in her PJ’s until she had a big, sugary breakfast with King. Not only she hadn’t eat yet, but she was sitting in her window, staring at her cellphone – not the little communicator she uses to send sappy text to little Boots (another bad sign), but the human device that she knew for sure can’t send messages without a working portal. Luz was staring at it with unfocused eyes, a neutral expression on her face and a hand pressing on her stomach, like it hurt her.

“Hey kiddo, are you good?” Eda set foot in the room, with the intention of shake herself the girl if she wouldn’t respond soon. But she probably stepped in her peripheral vision because Luz jumped out of the window, hiding the cellphone behind her back.

“Eda! I didn’t hear you…” She scratched her neck and made a nervous giggle, hoping to sound natural and casual.

She failed.

“Yeah, I figured it out when I called you forty times and I had to pick the door. Since when you lock the door?”

“I just, you know, wanted some privacy…”

Again, another bad sign: when Luz isolates herself, it’s because she doesn’t want to share something, usually important and about her well-being. But before Eda could open her mouth to express her concerns, Luz ran outside the room, and she could swear that she heard the kid sniffled on her way out.

Yep, something was definitively wrong.

***

Luz managed to delay the conversation that Eda desperately wanted to have with her, non without difficulty. She had to invent all sorts of excuses, and she even started to clean Hooty by herself to avoid the witch; but she knew she couldn’t do it all day. She needed something to get Eda out of the house, so that she could sort her feelings alone and just… pretend that today was a day like any other.

“You wanna try to make a new portal door right now?”

“Well, not like immediately…” Luz said, looking at everything but Eda’s eyes. “But I really hoped we could work on it as soon as possible, so that I could see my mom again…”

It wasn’t a total lie. Luz wanted to see her mother; but at the same time, she didn’t want to say goodbye to all the amazing people she met in the Boiling Isles. She wasn’t really thrilled by the idea of a new portal door but asking Eda to search the parts for building it was the best idea she had in mind to distract her.

“Well, I guess we can go to the market and get all the ingredients to make the green liquid, an-”

Now the tricky part.

“Actually, I was thinking we could split up the work– you know, to not lose too much time: you and King could go to the market, while I search through your junk to see if we have any other useful stuff.”

Eda didn’t like the idea, at all. Narrowing her eyes, she leaned towards the girl.

“Are you sure?” Eda asked. She could tell that Luz didn’t have the force to walk all day, but her guts were telling her to not leave the girl alone. “We need to go up and down all Bonesborough, we’ll surely bump in your friends and little Boots.”

Luz nodded, an arm around her own waist and her eyes still avoiding Eda. A silence settled for a few seconds. She was sure that her plan had failed, at that point; then Eda shouted for King to prepare. Luz watched the two walk out the door but before she closed it, Eda turned back to face her. She looked like she wanted to say something to her; but in the end, she gave Luz a soft smile, and wave her goodbye.

Luz let out a long breath. She was finally alone: no King asking her to play ‘war strategies’ with him, no Eda trying to make her talk…

“HEY LUUUUZ!”

Oh no.

“Hooty…” She’d completely forgot about him. He stretched himself enough to enveloped her with his body, and crushed her in his special ‘Hooty Hug’

“Eda just told me that you needed me as assistant. And as your friend, I will do anything in my power to help through all your problems!”

“Thanks, Hooty, but…”

“There are no buts in friendship!”

“But…” Luz tried to come up with something to distract him. After a while, she was struck by an idea. “But I do need your help.”

Hooty gasped loudly and set Luz free from his hug.

“What do you need? Have I the time to bake some cookies?”

“Maybe later.” Luz said. She walked towards a window and pointed at the trees that surrounded the Owl House. “But now, I need you to find me the best leaf in the world. I don’t care how long it takes, just be sure that the leaf you’ll choose is perfect.”

“I WON’T LET YOU DOWN, LUZ!”

And with that scream, Hooty rushed out in the forest, eager to help. He started a loop in which he would find a leaf, declared it was perfect and then gasped a second later, tossed it away and took another leaf, for then start all over again. Luz watched the scene till she was sure that he would not return home soon.

An hour later, Hooty was still searching the best leaf, while Luz was heading to the basement. After spending that time looking to some old photos and that little calendar notification that made her heart lost a beat that morning, she needed to do something to rest her eyes; and since she told Eda that she’d seek the items for the portal door, she decided to give a look at the mound of garbage/treasure that was hiding in the basement.

She couldn’t believe she had forgot about today…

In her defense, she had to deal with a lot of things in these months; but that didn’t mean that it was hurting less.

Most of the things in the basement were useless, creepy or both, like the one-eyed dummy on wheels that she always forgets it’s in the left corner of the room, and that makes her shiver every time she sees it. Today was no exception. After recovering from the fright, she started roaming in the room. She spent a good half hour clearing the center of the floor to move easily and collecting all the thing she needed in a cardboard box. She was almost done, when she accidentally pushed a plank, causing the collapse of a shelf. She saw the objects it held roll all over the floor: a worn-out hat, a couple of spring glasses and some CDs. One of this caught Luz’s attention. She dropped everything she had and leaned to take it. It had a picture of some men with various instruments, and above them were the title: Merengue Mix.

She stared at it for a while, like in trance. And still in that state she got up and went to a little stereo she saw early. Luz put the CD and listen it spinning inside the stereo; then the music started.

She wasn’t sure she knew that song, but she still could feel her feet ready to jump, like she already knew how the song went. She followed the sound of the güira, the accordion and the tambora with her shoulders, and before she realized it, she was dancing. She spun around the room and look again at the dummy but this time, she didn’t feel creeped. She took it and dressed it with the things she had near: the hat, the glasses, and a shaggy red feather boa. She pulled it closer to her and started dancing with her new partner. While the music went on, she closed her eyes; if she couldn’t cast an illusion spell, then she would rely on the power of her imagination.

Luz reopened her eyes, and now the basement was gone, replaced by a hall decorated in blue, white and red. The music was now played by a live band, and all around her there were loads of dancers, all with a familiar face: all her primos, Tìa Lola and Tìo Carlos; even her abuela was on the floor, with her walking frame. She saw the tables at the back of the hall, and even if they were distant, she could smell the food on them: guisados, sancocho, pastelòn and a mountain of sweets were making her mouthwatering.

And in front of her, instead of the dummy, was her mother, in a beautiful dress that matched the decoration of the place. She was stunning: she’d always been a better dancer than her, and she was giving all her soul in this moment. She could look at her forever. They danced together for what it felt like hours, and she knew that they could have last even longer…

But then the stereo decided that she had enough fun and died.

Luz was once again in the basement of the Owl House, and in front of her there was the same creepy dummy as before; but now it seemed almost alive to her eyes.

“LUZ, I FOUND IT, I FOUND THE PERFECT LEAF AND – OH MY GOSH, A BUG!”

She heard Hooty swallow something. Then he started crying for having destroyed the precious leaf. Luz decided to go upstairs and soothe him before he tried to detach himself from the house again. She went up the stairs but before she left the room, she looked behind her; she looked at the stereo, and at the dummy.

She knew that it’d lasted just for a couple of minutes and was only in her head but… Luz was glad she’d had a nice quinceañera, after all.

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

(Urgent) Hello! I really need help, I already searched on the internet but didnt find a satisfying answer so I really hope you'll be able to help. Soo I have to take swimming classes, I've been doing it and it's okay, the problem is that I'm on my period and absolutely can't wear tampons (or things similar) and I obviously don't have and won't get special swimwear. I don't want to tell my parents because I doubt they will understand.

Is there something I can do?

Lee says:

This is a good question! It’s probably relevant to a lot of transmasculine folks with the summer coming up and people being able to return to the pools and beaches since many of us are fully vaccinated now.

Unfortunately, I could come up with only six different (non-ideal) options to solve the problem:

1) Don't go swimming when you have your period

This might be a good option for a casual swimmer, but it isn't ideal if you're in swim classes and can't reschedule a class, or on a swim team and can't miss a practice or meet.

You could always quit and find a new form of exercise / a new job / a new sports team, but obviously that’s sort of a last resort if you can’t find any solution at all.

2) Wear a tampon

Tampons can be worn safely while swimming and prevent the blood from staining your suit when you get out of the pool.

To help prevent toxic shock syndrome, which is rare but dangerous, use the lowest absorbency tampon you can and change your tampon every 4-8 hours or as often as needed. Don’t leave your tampon in for more than 8 hours.

You said that you “absolutely can't wear tampons,” but didn’t clarify why you can’t do it. If the reason is unrelated to dysphoria then you may have a medical condition, or it may be that your hymen is covering the opening to your vagina. A doctor or nurse (either your primary care provider or someone at a nearby Planned Parenthood or similar) can help you figure out why it’s causing pain and figure out what to do about it if you do suspect it’s medical-related and not psychological.

Many trans people like wearing tampons for their convenience and because tampons don’t cause the bloody-diaper feeling that pads can cause; there are a number of anons who have told us that using tampons make them feel less dysphoric than wearing pads.

Putting in a tampon usually doesn’t hurt, but it may take some practice in the beginning. 

3) Wear a menstrual cup

Menstrual cups are safe to wear when you’re swimming, and function similarly to tampons.

Menstrual cups are great for people who are stealth but still get a period.

They’re small and easy to hide in your bedroom/dorm room/summer camp cabin, they’re reusable so you don’t have to buy more than one, and you can often use one cup for up to 10 years so you don’t have to buy them often.

Menstrual cups are discreet because you can wear a menstrual cup for 8-12 hours at a time, or until it’s full; this is because they hold 1 ounce of liquid, roughly twice the amount of a super-absorbent tampon or pad.

Having to emptying it only 2-3 times a day means you don’t have to carry extras with you that someone might notice in your bag, you never have to change your cup in the bathroom at school or at work, and you don’t have to worry about changing it in the locker room before you go swimming. 

Menstrual blood can start to smell when it’s exposed to air, but your cup forms an airtight seal so there’s less odor to bother you, and nothing for other people to notice either.

Cups may look kind of big, but most people can’t feel them once they’re in.

Putting in a cup shouldn’t hurt, but it may take some practice in the beginning. 

4) Wear a menstrual disc

Menstrual discs are similar to menstrual cups and can be worn swimming as well.

They aren’t reusable and are placed in a different way, but many of the pros are the same as those for cups.

5) Buy swimwear that helps catch or hide the blood

There are swimsuits which are dark colored and have absorbent layers built in to catch blood when you’re out of the pool (Example) but that isn’t very useful if you’re actually in the pool, or if you’re required to wear a certain type of swimsuit as a lifeguard, swimming instructor, or member of a swimming team. So this isn’t an ideal option, and you said that you don't have and won't get special swimwear.

6) Stop your menstrual cycle so you don't get your period while swimming (or at all, in general!)

This post lists a few non-dysphoria-related excuses you can use when asking your parents to stop your period, but saying that it interferes with your swimming lessons should be reason enough.

Everything you need to know about stopping your period with birth control

Everything you need to know about birth control

What You Need to Know About Birth Control and Breast Cancer

What’s up with birth control pills and vaping?

Will the chemicals in birth control mess me up?

What are birth control side effects?

Can I get birth control at Planned Parenthood without my parents’ permission?

Birth Control Your Own Adventure

Does depo-provera cause depression?

Are Low-Dose Birth Control Pills Right for You?

-

Given the information in your ask, you can’t skip lessons so option #1 is out, you can’t use tampons so option #2 is out, you won’t get special swimwear so option #5 is out, and you can’t tell your parents that you want to stop your period so option #6 is out. 

That leaves options #3 and #4, menstrual cups and discs. I would recommend doing some research on each option to see what fits your needs the best. 

However, if you feel unable to discuss menstruation with your parents, I would recommend a cup because they’re reusable you only need to buy one and that’s a good thing because it saves you money in the long term and you don’t need to repeatedly have to buy something that you’re embarrassed to talk about and hiding from them.

Here’s an article reviewing different menstrual cups here and I’d suggest looking at that. 

That article has links to buy the cups online, and this post explains how to buy something online without a credit card and without your parents finding out.

You can also buy menstrual cups in-person at a pharmacy, if there’s one close enough for you to walk or bike to, or if you can get a friend to bring you.

Hopefully that’s a good start for things to consider, but I know that it probably isn’t the satisfying answer that you were hoping for since you won’t like any of the options. 

However, I will note that I had a hysterectomy in 2018 so it’s been a lil while since I’ve had to deal with swimming while menstruating myself, so if the followers have any ideas that I’ve forgotten please feel free to add on!

(And yeah, a hysterectomy will definitely solve this issue for you but I’m assuming that’s a no-go in your situation which is why I didn’t include it in the list)

Anyhow, followers, any advice for anon?

[homerforsure]

Whumptober No. 5

betrayal / misunderstanding / broken nose

(Hockey AU)

***

He’d always thought the night Jay took the picture would be the worst of it.

Buck’s hands were clutching the rails of Jay’s iron headboard, where Jay had wanted them, where Jay had placed them after stripping Buck of his clothes, saying “Don’t let go.” His slow, sexy, predatory smile was the last thing Buck saw before the silky black blindfold was tied in place. Jay was gone after that, climbing off the bed, telling Buck how good he looked and what he thought he might do and Buck had arched into the words until he was begging to be touched.

“Be patient,” Jay had purred, appeasing Buck with a single finger drawn shiveringly down his thigh. Buck could feel that he’d climbed back onto the bed, but Jay was too far away and he wasn’t teasing; he just wasn’t there. Stretching out longer on the mattress, trying to find him, he’d said, “What’s going on up there?”

Then the flash went off, the bright light cutting through the thin fabric of the blindfold. Jay swore, “Shit. Fuck,” and when Buck let go of the bed with one hand (one hand because maybe he misunderstood, maybe it was fine, maybe he’d laugh and put his hand back and they’d-)to push the tie away, he’d seen Jay, crouched above him with his phone in his hand.

If he’d asked, Buck might even have agreed. He liked posing. He liked having his body appreciated. But Jay’s expression was the alarm of being caught red-handed and Buck knew, knew with a sinking feeling of dread and betrayal, that Jay wasn’t just taking a memento to savor later. He was taking a picture of Rangers center Evan Buckley, naked, smirking, and vulnerable, to use exactly the way those kinds of pictures get used.

Buck forced Jay to delete the photo, made him prove that he’d done it, and then had somehow managed to get himself dressed and down to the street to get a ride without throwing up. His face burned the whole drive home and for half of the night.

And that was the worst of it until five years later. In a new city. When Buck was finally playing the way he’d always known he could. When he was finally earning the respect of his team and the hockey world at large. When he started thinking he might stay. That was when the anonymously authored post was retweeted and reblogged and shared and gleefully discussed on all corners of the hockey internet.

MY WILD NIGHT WITH AN NHL ALL STAR

The Good, the Bad, and the Kinky

His agent’s was the first text he saw when he got done with practice: “Do NOT respond yet. Call me first.”

It had taken another couple messages before Buck realized what he wasn’t supposed to respond to and in the meantime, the texts kept rolling in. Half of them from numbers he didn’t even have saved in his contacts.

“Dude, is that shit true?”

“Are you okay?”

“Do you know who it is?”

“You dog 😜”

“You never told me you were into that 👀”

“Ignore it, Buck.”

“We’re all with you.”

“Fuck that guy.”

“Hey if you need something to take your mind off of it💋💋💋”

“Evan, Mike from the Tribune. If you want to set the record straight, please give me a call.”

From the looks on the faces of his teammates as they tried to pretend they weren’t stealing glances at him, they were getting messages of their own. Hen was the first one to start to approach him with a look of concern, but Buck avoided her, grabbing his bag and sneaking out the door without bothering to hit the stationary bike like usual.

“What the hell did you do to piss this guy off?” Geoff said as soon as he answered Buck’s call. “More importantly, what else does he have on you?”

“Nothing!” Buck answered, nearly merging directly into another car as his hands shook on the steering wheel. “What do I do? How do I fix this?”

“I don’t know, Buckley. None of my other clients get up to shit like this. You need to get yourself a publicist. I’m going to get in touch with Grant and make sure they’re not already shopping you.”

His agent hung up and Buck’s phone continued to buzz and chime all the way back to his apartment.

There were cameras outside which there almost never were. Mostly only hockey fans cared about pictures of hockey players and the press was limited to the arena and their official events. Maybe one or two regular guys who Buck knew by name. It was just his luck that he lived in LA where there were almost more cameras than there were disasters to photograph.

“Buck! Do you know who the author is?”

“Have your teammates seen the post?”

“Are you worried about other former partners coming out with similar stories?”

Buck pushed past them, but the questions followed him inside. His phone didn’t stop. His mentions were a nightmare on every platform. He shut Twitter as soon as he opened it and saw his name in the trending topics. The statements put out by the Kings and Buck’s agent condemning the piece and the interest in it were drowned out by outlet after outlet picking up the post and sharing it out wider and wider.

Can you guess this NHL player by his sexcapades? (Hint: It’s exactly who you think)

Hockey players used to be the humble, hard working gentleman of sports. What happened?

Should the Kings trade Evan Buckley? Can they?

Nash should make Buckley sit for embarrassing the team like this.

Aw, man, don’t do that. Sitting’s a little tough for Buckley right now

🤣

And I thought it couldn’t get worse than the time he fucked that mascot in Carolina

{This post may contain explicit content}

😵‍💫

🤮

Excuse you, Gritty has standards

[98 more posts]

Whether from a latent masochistic streak or just because he didn’t want to look away and find that the story had gotten bigger while he was gone, Buck couldn’t stop refreshing the pages. He read Jay’s words over and over again as his stomach roiled. If it had all been lies, Buck wouldn’t have spent the morning pressed into the corner of his couch, hoodie pulled up over his head like armor. If it had all been lies, he could have made a fiery statement, condemning the mystery author and condemning everyone who thought they had a right to consume and critique another person’s sex life.

There were some lies, of course, but it was true enough that Buck’s heart clenched with it. True enough that he could remember how he felt when it was happening, during the three times they’d been together before the photo. Soft and desired and joyful. There was a part of him that was still exposed to Jay, that always would be, this man with the sharp wit and the sharp smile who got Buck bare, begging and biddable all to make him a joke. As he read the smug asides in the unforgiving narrative, he could hear Jay’s voice in his ear.

The sixth time he read it, there was an addition.

Edit: Ha ha wow this really blew up. Doing an AMA at 6 eastern if you’re looking for more dirty details.

And for the first time, Buck felt the burn of tears in his eyes. Furious. Powerless.

The buzz of his phone started making his skin crawl so he shoved it between the couch cushions and tried not to think about it. He sat with his knees pulled up to his chest and his arms wrapped tightly around, rocking just a little as he felt panic creeping in.

What else could Jay possibly have to say? Would he make up more and more audacious lies as long as he had an audience? Would an NHL team want to touch Buck when he was done?

Were there more pictures?

It was the fourth night, the night that Buck caught Jay. Not the first night with the blindfold. What if? Buck shuddered, sinking lower, deeper into the couch, folding himself tighter and smaller, trying to crush the mounting, hopeless fear. He was there for a long time.

When the gentle knock hit his door, Buck jumped and then crouched tighter into his ball. He didn’t answer. There was no one he could face right now.

The knock came again.

Then the door opened.

Buck was up like a shot, nearly falling over the coffee table as he whirled around toward the intruder. Eddie stood in the doorway, holding up one empty hand and pulling his key out of the door with the other.

“Just me.”

“What are you doing here?” Buck asked, shoving his hands into the pocket of his hoodie to hide the fact that he’d been digging his nails into his palms for the last hour.

“Well, you took off. And you weren’t answering your phone.”

Hot shame flushed across Buck’s skin. Eddie knew. Eddie had seen the article and the articles about the article and the tweets about the articles and been shouted at by the cameras outside and Buck wanted to sink into the floor.

“Notice you didn’t take the hint.”

The attitude in Buck’s response didn’t faze Eddie at all, “Do I ever?”

And that almost made Buck feel like smiling, because no, no he didn’t. He said, “No. But there’s always a first time.”

Eddie came a little further into the apartment and Buck felt crowded. Eddie always seemed to take up so much space around him. Maybe it was just that Buck felt his presence most strongly than anyone else’s. Especially when he was like this: arms crossed, focused, not letting Buck wiggle out of a conversation that he didn’t want to have.

This time was no exception. When Buck turned and went back to the couch, compulsively refreshing the comments on Jay’s post again as he went, Eddie followed right after him.

“I came by to make sure you were okay,” he said and Buck flinched again, hating that Eddie knew. Hating that the team knew.

“I’m fine,” he answered, keeping his eyes down and away from Eddie. “Coach is going to rip me a new one tomorrow, but my agent hasn’t called me to tell me I’m being traded so yet so I guess that’s-”

“Who the fuck said you were being traded?” His voice was loud enough that Buck looked up, surprised to see the intensity of anger in Eddie’s face.

“THN. NHL Network did a round table on it too, but they didn’t think anyone would take me. Oh, then Kirk Davis did a radio interview.”

Everyone had picked up those soundbites. Even through the heavily bleeped broadcast, the future hall-of-famer’s opinion on Buck had been crystal clear. At least that wasn’t new information for Buck. Davis had all but refused to shake Buck’s hand when he first joined the Predators and was a big part of why his tenure there had only lasted until the trade deadline.

“Kirk Davis is a fucking asshole. There’s a reason they never made him captain.”

“He’s not the only one who said it.”

“Then he’s not the only fucking asshole out there.” When he didn’t respond, Eddie came around the couch to stand face to face with him, noticing the open comments page as he did. “Christ, have you been reading that shit all day?”

Somehow it made Buck laugh. “It’s the same shit I’ve been reading for 8 years. Since I got drafted. Buckley’s a distraction to his team. Buckley’s an embarrassment to the game of hockey. Buckley cares more about getting laid and partying than he does about winning. It’s guys like Buckley that hurt the NHL.”

His voice pitched up as he recited the familiar accusations, staring somewhere over Eddie’s shoulder because Eddie already knew all this about him. Eddie was the opposite of Buck in every way. He would never make himself the center of attention. He’d never do anything to make his teammates ashamed to play with him. He’d never be so stupid as to go home with a guy like Jay.

“Buckley’s finally getting what he deserves.” Buck whispered.

“Look at me,” Eddie said. When Buck couldn’t, Eddie reached out, setting a light hand on his shoulder that got tighter when Buck tried to shrug out of the hold. “Hey. Look at me.”

He moved his head into the space where Buck was staring into the middle distance and waited. Until Buck couldn’t help but flick his gaze to meet Eddie’s. Once he did, he found a furious compassion that startled him.

“You don’t deserve this, Buck. You did nothing to deserve this. It is not your fault. Nobody in our room thinks it is. Bobby doesn’t think it is.”

Buck shuddered under the weight of the words. He wanted to pull himself free and he wanted to step in closer, “My agent told me I should own it. Post a couple thirst traps and a middle finger on instagram and just wave it off like another classic Evan Buckley weekend.”

There was a time when he would have. Times when he had. But this wasn’t a ridiculous paparazzi photo outside a bar, it was… It was private. It hurt.

As if reading his mind, Eddie said, “That’s not what this is. Fire him if he wants to make you pretend this is okay.”

“I just keep thinking if I was anyone else. If I was someone good, they’d all go after him and not me. I didn’t even do anything to him, Eddie. I didn’t-”

Before he could finish his sentence, Eddie tugged him forward and his arms were tight around his back. Buck should have tried to fight it, but he couldn’t help but fall against his chest and cling on. “You are someone good,” Eddie said, making Buck’s breath hitch. “And if you weren’t, it wouldn’t matter. It’s wrong. They’re wrong.”

“I shouldn’t have trusted him,” Buck confessed into the soft fabric of Eddie’s shirt. “I was so stupid back then. I just wanted- I wanted him to like me. And I’m still- It still hurts that he didn’t. How fucked up is that? He did this. And I still just wish he liked me.”

One of Eddie’s hands moved up to cradle the back of Buck’s head. They were swaying, just a little, Eddie rocking them gently. “I know,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”

He managed to keep from crying, but Buck couldn’t stop his breath from coming out in soft, stuttering gasps. Couldn’t keep his fingers from digging into Eddie’s back. If he thought about it, he could imagine this post too (Evan Buckley cried like a baby on my shoulder AMA), but Eddie would never do that. The warm heat of him against Buck’s chest was like a blanket hiding him from the world. It was the most vulnerable he’d been all day and the most sheltered.

Eddie didn’t let go until Buck pulled back and even then he didn’t go far, “Have you eaten since practice?”

“I didn’t think I’d be able to without throwing up,” Buck said honestly.

“Do you want to order something from-”

The timer on Buck’s laptop shrieked and they both jumped. Eddie recovered quickly, but Buck’s heart leapt into his throat. He’d almost forgotten. How could he have forgotten? Pulling away from Eddie, he turned off the timer and refreshed the post, looking for the link he knew would be there.

“Come on, Buck, really?”

Eddie reached out to slam the laptop closed, but Buck shoved his hand in the way. “I have to, Eddie. He’s doing an AMA. I have to-”

“I’m not going to let you torture yourself reading what a bunch of sick assholes have to say, Buck. No way.”

“I have to.”

“No, you-”

“Yes, I do!” He shouted it, standing up to look Eddie in the eye. “I have to read it. I have to see it now because if- if- if I wait and it gets reposted- I have to know if he has- I have to-”

“Buck,” Eddie said, putting his hands on Buck’s arms, trying to rub calmness back into him even as Buck’s heart-rate accelerated. “What does he have? What could be worse than what he already-”

“Pictures,” Buck yelled. “I have to know if he has pictures.”

A dark, dark look came over Eddie’s face and he stopped rubbing Buck’s arms to squeeze instead. “You think he has pictures?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” Buck whimpered. He saw himself as if from above, stretched out long and lewd against Jay’s sheets. He imagined ten thousand other people seeing it. “He took- I caught him taking one. Once. But I don't know if it was the only one. I don’t- I can’t let them get out. If he has them, I have to know. I have to report the post. I have to-”

“No,” Eddie said.

“Yes, Eddie. I have-”

“I hear you. Okay? I hear you, but I’m not letting you do that. I’m not letting you put any more of that garbage in your head.”

“Eddie.”

“I’ll do it. I’ll report every goddamn post.” Lifting one hand, Eddie stroked a thumb softly along Buck’s hairline. “Let me do it. Let me protect you.”

Buck swallowed hard, fear and relief and longing fighting for control of the tears that were building up again. He didn’t want Eddie to see any of that. He didn’t want Jay’s words in Eddie’s head. But Buck really really didn’t want them in his own. He wanted someone to protect him. “Thank you,” he said, falling forward again to rest his head on Eddie’s shoulder.

“I’ve got you,” Eddie replied, rubbing his hands firmly up Buck’s back.

Eddie wouldn’t let Buck sit on the couch while he monitored the thread. He fished Buck’s phone out of the couch and made him answer the important messages. From Maddie. From Bobby. From Hen and Chimney. Then he’d told him to order food from the Lebanese place they always ordered from when Eddie came over, asking for extra of the pickled turnips. All the while, Eddie’s fingers slammed onto the keyboard, that sound the only reaction he gave to any of the posts.

It should have been unbearable, letting Eddie comb through the messages. Even without seeing them, Buck knew what they were like. He blocked people every week for the same kind of thing. But Eddie had a defense against them that Buck never had: he didn’t believe they were true. Not even a little bit. He didn’t believe there was a chance that Buck was getting what he deserved for being a show off, for never being a points leader, for being open and soft hearted, for being himself. Eddie believed Buck deserved to be protected and he was ruthless about it.

“No pictures,” he said, a while later, when Jay had finally stopped replying to every comment on the page. “And the rest of it is… well. It’s nothing new.”

“Really?”

“Really. I think it’s done.”

Eddie closed the laptop as if by making that gesture of finality, he could make the words true. Buck, allowed back on his own couch, let himself believe it too. Let himself lean into the safety of Eddie’s arm over his shoulders, breathing in a deep sigh of relief as they caught the Canucks game.

The next morning, Jay’s story was hardly anywhere to be seen. It was replaced. By an essay in The Players’ Tribune. It excoriated Jay. It called out Kirk Davis by name and hundreds of online posters by their bad intentions. It praised Buck’s grace, tenacity, and backhand shot and it demanded respect and compassion and privacy from anyone who called themselves a hockey fan. And it wasn’t anonymous.

[meidozangetsuha]

Meanwhile you, a grown ass adult, is a die hard shipper of a child and her cherished adult guardian, using the excuse of sHe GreW UP, well, ofc children grow up and get married, have kids, but not when it’s with a trusted adult they know and relied on who saved their life multiple times. Yall hide behind IT’s a CaRTooN, keep deflecting and reaching and ignoring, fiction does affect reality And this terrible anime is being targeted at kids in Japan, not to AdUlts.

-remembers watching School Days when i was young and that time i became a crazy deranged stalker and murdred a guy when i was 15 bc, except i didn't bc my parents raised me with morals-

-remembers that i used to really like a student/teacher ship when i was a high schooler, but never found anything appealing about that real life and knew it was bad when that shit happened bc my parents actually raised me to understand right from wrong and what predatory adults are-

man i just like it because it's like, straight out of a fairy tale. ya know, down on her luck orphan gets saved by an immortal monster, forms a bond with them, falls in love later? that's why i like it! that's all! and because it's canon and produced one of my favorite characters ever! ok it's good now that we have

i know this might be hard for you to understand, but:

Children are not as stupid as you are.

i do not necessarily agree with many other proshippers about the extent of fiction never affecting reality (propaganda specifically, things that are specifically meant and designed to install morals) because it's take i can't fully agree with; when cartoons intentionally try to install morals about race, sex, gender, etc.

and then there's a cartoon that has a ship as backstory. it's not even the main focus. nor do even i wish for it to be, because this is a story about the yashahime, not their parents. i do not fear people will watch Fruits Basket and think such relationships in the real world are OK either.

kids are smarter than you give them credit for. as long as they are raised properly, with love and guidance, instead of just letting the internet and tv dictate everything they should feel and do. people's very hearts and feelings can change of things they read and become attracted to, yes- such things are what authors and writers strive for! for words to become so impactful they can even touch people's very hearts! and of course, many install our own emotions and beliefs into our words.

But, it is not their job to teach you and your children right from wrong.

Children, teenagers, are smarter than you give them credit for. They are capable of enjoying things while knowing that real life does not reflect this way. I understand this might be hard for terminally online idiot who let their morals be determined solely by whatever you've read or watched, but I'm fairly confidant no girl is going to grow up thinking they should fuck a 900 year old dog demon that saved their life when they were like 9 because they happened to watch Yashahime as a teen.

I'm sorry you lost all your brain cells growing up. Fiction can affect our perceptions in reality when efficiently used and utilized to this purpose, indeed! But not in this way you think it is. Not in this sense of "Oh, someone watched an anime with an agegap once, now they'll think it's OK forever!"

I'm sorry you lost all your brain cells growing up, ooooor your parents are doing a shit-ass job at passing on morals to you. Regardless; it's not this cartoon's fault for that.

[lindgaardbojsen02]

How A Computer Virus-Free

The Internet consists of a large network of powerful computers all throughout the country that are permanently connected together. These computers usually stored in special buildings with incredibly own power supply to sure they can operate continually. iexplorer Activation Key of the Internet is stored on these computers, which are called contains. Is it possible to repair glitches for internet explorer 7? Yes, you can theoretically repair the program when iExplorer it is going to its bizarre little topics. Microsoft actually takes the position there is not wrong with Explorer five. Instead, the company says the thing lies with the the site. They are not designed towards specifications of Explorer 7 or the actual excuse turns out. Apparently, Microsoft expects the regarding websites within the market to redesign themselves on the Explorer 7 specs. Good luck with which in turn. Let us now the look at a few important plug-ins for Web browser. Obviously, some common plug-ins like The search engines toolbar are not explained. Below listed is really a few less popular ones, nonetheless can be important to many users. Plug-ins can join in lot of things for you, beginning with killing unwanted ads, to securing web access. Both them is free of charge of cost, but you will need to download the right plug-ins for that right IE versions. While Ie 8 has always felt faster than Firefox, Ie 9 feels closer in speed and responsiveness to Google Chrome than issues. But for on the subject of its innovations to work properly, it the interface and the backing of Windows 7th. If you were aiming to get it to work with Windows XP, you'll be getting to discouraged that Internet explorer download, because it isn't supported on Experience. So, what problems are you having? Allow me to guess. Sites you visited all frequently with Ie 6 don't load? As well as run into the joyous moment when Explorer 7 freezes when you try to tab between url pages? Advanced users find it particularly momentous when Explorer conflicts with updates to sub-programs being made available from MICROSOFT! Lovely. Just lovely. People often think that Internet Explorer has been the dominant web browser since the golden time of the internet began. Well for an especially long time now usual indeed been the most frantic browser including times been almost totally unrivalled. He did this mainly an effect of it being packaged free with Microsoft Windows, in what some would later call a brutal monopolisation attempt by Microsoft windows. The last year or two however have heralded the arrival of new, possibly superior browsers. Mozilla's Firefox been recently particularly successful at chipping away at Explorers market dominance. So where did all of it begin, exactly why were Microsoft ever in order to have double market dominance? Special software was designed to address the issues listed above - NetConceal Anonymizer, it keeps you free from manual proxy server checking, SOCKS configuration and supports ALL software program. Actually, a few clicks to hide IP address and become anonymous. I can't see my dropdown effects or links using IE7, but everything works fine your newest versions of Firefox, Opera and Netscape. Does anyone have got suggestions or work arounds for this issue?