#once again making me want to leave this fandom bc i cannot fucking stand these losers

[tobe-sogolden]

.

[sillystardew]

Hi! I’m really new to the Stardew fandom (just started playing this year) and am so smitten by Shane it’s ridiculous. I love the fluffy things you’ve written so far <3

Was wondering if you’d write something about the farmer repairing the holes in Shane’s jacket. Like sewing little chicken patches or patches of random fabric to fix the holes.

Could maybe extend the prompt to the other bachelors (farmer fixing something small of theirs that they use daily) but I’d be so satisfied with just Shane <3

Keep up the wonderful writing! I’d love to read your fic in AO3 when it’s out!

Ahh tysm! I’m really glad people are liking the things i write, it’s actually been helping me practice a lot more than i used to!!

It’s such a cute idea to be like “hey i can fix that for ya :)” and the romanceables just being so amazed that the farmer can do literally anything?? Anyway i did this with Shane, Elliott and Sam bc i love this prompt soooo much

Gender neutral reader 🦇

Shane

-Shane is a sucker for little details. He loves those iron-on patches (and definitely puts some of them on Jas’ clothes) but beyond that, he’s too afraid to mess his clothes up even further, so he kind of just leaves the rest of it alone.

-If you offer to sew up his Joja jacket, he’s a little hesitant. Its one of his number-one comfort items and he doesn’t want to risk it getting ruined, but the second you say you can probably also remove the joja logo, he’s on board.

-He specifically asks you not to mess with the holes in the pockets because he likes fiddling with them when he’s just standing around

-He assumed you would just sew the holes closed, but when he sees that you’ve also put little patches on it, he literally gasps

“is that a fucking junimo?”

-The Joja logo is replaced with a little chicken and he just kind of stares at it for a while

-Tbh he doesn’t wash it for a few weeks afterwards because he’s really scared the stitching will come undone and he doesn’t want to make you sew it up again

-He’s embarrassed because he feels like he shouldn’t be this excited over a beat up old jacket. Save this man

Sam

-Like shane, he loves iron-on patches. He probably doesn’t have a single jacket or hoodie that doesn’t have one or two. He doesn’t consider himself particularly outdoorsy, but he is a skater, so most of his clothes are pretty roughed up

-Idk if you guys have noticed but his jacket in the game is just as bad as Shanes, if not WORSE. How have these two managed to literally destroy their clothes. Is Joja forcing them to roll in gravel

-Anyway, he’s stoked when you offer to fix up his clothes. His mom pesters him about “looking at least a *little* presentable” so he’s just glad to finally be able to wear his jacket in peace

-He thinks it’s literally so cool. He’s dumbfounded. “Where did you learn how to do that????” Sam. Sammy. There are so many tutorials online

-He really wants to ask you if you know how to embroider something on his guitar strap but he’s too nervous

Elliott

-He looooves embroidery, and there’s something so wonderful about the sentimental value of sewing an old piece of clothing back to it’s original form

-He’s the type of guy to cry over those videos where people have their really old stuffed animals + blankets remade with the old material still inside

-A lot of his clothes are actually really old. He and Leah go thrifting in the city every once in a while (you CANNOT tell me those two don’t go to goodwill..) I think Leah and Emily are pretty good friends, so by extension, Emily has fixed a few of Elliott’s thrifting finds

-If you offer to fix up any scuffs you see or offer to embroider something he’s just like “you would do that?? For me???”

-He loves sentimental things like this so sometimes he’ll just run his fingers along the seam and smile like a dork to himself. He’s soooo *explodes*

[oldsmobile-hotdogs]

Questions for crossover jatp ghosts crossover fic: I hope Julian and the sunset curve boys talk about the fall of the Berlin Wall and the Yugoslav wars that happened when they were alive + Bill Cilnton. I wonder what pat and the band would talk about considering that they would of been kids when pat died? Do you think Julie would think of Les Mis and Hamilton cos Thomas and Kitty are from about the same time period as those musicals? I hope Julie calls Fanny Mary poppins.

Anon, or "Mimi", or "Lulu", or, heck, maybe even "Carl Birtles": Update: Not Carl Birtles. Carl Birtles sent me an ask and is cool, actually.

Stop. Right now. I'd say stop while you're ahead, but you are so far away from ahead at this point it's laughable.

For everyone confused, this is that "commenter from AO3" I joked about making a 2017-esque story time video about.

A couple days ago I uploaded the first chapter of a Julie and the Phantoms/BBC Ghosts crossover fic.

You know what? I’m gonna promo it here bc it’s my callout post and I can shill if I want to: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30681704/chapters/76661471

It was generally very well received and I've had a blast interacting with readers.

Except for this.

Honestly, there's so much to get into, so I’m putting it under a cut:

This was their first correspondence (email notif bc I deleted the comment, the deletion to be explained later):

(Funnily enough, the links very much do not work on AO3, making the comment only more jarring)

I gave you *so much* benefit of the doubt when I saw this comment, and assumed that maybe you're an ESL user, just very enthusiastic to share ideas, and I pretty much said so in my reply, but know that at that point I'd already had friends- who fucking know about this, don't you dare think you're getting me alone- tell me that you were being very demanding.

Below was my reply (another email notif):

I'm gonna be honest, I think I responded really well to what I was given, and now that I'd replied, I was pretty certain the situation was dealt with. You, evidently, didn't agree, as shown by your reply to my reply:

A word of advice: when replying to someone, at least pretend like you read what they wrote.

At this point I'm left wondering two things:

What do they expect from me, if a general reply is not it?

How much more shit do they have waiting to tell me to put in my- reminder, JATP/BBC Ghosts crossover, rated T, comedic- fic?

In order to avoid finding out either, I freeze the thread on AO3. I'm liveblogging all of this on Discord.

It's then that I notice that the username on AO3 isn't clickable, so even if I wanted to block or report them I couldn't. I assume, therefore, that they've deactivated, and since them seeing their comments gone and getting angry was the only thing stopping me deleting the comments, I delete the comments.

It's also at this point I see "Mimi" never left kudos. I guess I don't deserve praise until I mention "Bill Cilnton".

There's relative calm for a short amount of time, until I get another comment:

This one is much kinder than the others and doesn't mention any specific, weird, historical events, so the extent to which I think this is "Mimi" is debatable, but bestie I'm weirded out enough that anything that even uses the enter bar unnecessarily and misses out conjunctive words like "because" and "and" is going to activate fight or flight. Update: Carl Birtles is not Mimi or Lulu. Carl was just being genuinely kind and I misinterpreted it and that's on me.

However, "Carl"'s case is not helped by the fact I can't click his account either, that AO3 offers me the ability to report it as spam, and that guess who replies to "Carl"'s comment: Update: Carl, having done nothing wrong as he has, is therefore also a victim in the situation that is being replied to by Lulu. It would seem Lulu is trying to correct??? some of Carl's commentary.

You must think I didn't get a 7 on my English Literature GCSE because you seem to underestimate my ability to compare two texts.

So clearly this is "Mimi", who has also just replied to "Carl". "Lulu" is also deactivated, and I've fallen off the end of my tether, let alone reached it, at this point so I mark it as spam. "Carl" gets to stay bc he said the idea for the crossover was good. Update: Carl also gets to continue to stay because I have it on good faith that he's a stand-up dude.

So at this point you've readily admitted through your inability to shake up your writing style to using at least one sockpuppet to convince me to talk about the "Yugoslav wars".

If "Carl Birtles" is the real(-est) of them, and "Mimi" and "Lulu" are the sockpuppets, by the way, I have questions and ideas about what you do on your free evenings and I want them neither confirmed nor answered. Update: This is slanderous and I want to apologise wholeheartedly to Carl for making assumptions about him and judging his character. Once again, he is not Mimi or Lulu. He's just a normal, cool guy.

And now you come to me, on the day of my daughter's wedding on a different platform, leave me an anon ask in the exact same format as you're so fond of, and expect any different ??

Well, yeah, then I guess I'll give you special treatment this time.

Here's exactly why I will never include anything you have told me to include:

Julian and the Phantoms discussing the Berlin Wall would be highly inappropriate for the largely fluffy, cracky tone of my fanfiction, especially given how recently the event occurred, how many Eastern Germans still experience prejudice to this day because they were born within the old borders of the DDR, and because of how nuanced this, essentially proxy war, was and how ill-informed a huge amount of the world is on the actual factors in play during this time and the Cold War in general.

Julian and the Phantoms will not discuss Yugoslavia dissolving, nor the fallout and conflict that resulted, because it was genocidal. There is nowhere I can fit Julian, pantsted, casually asking Luke “hey do you remember when the Herzegovinas were killed en masse by the Serbs?” Not gonna happen.

They won’t discuss Bill Clinton because all of them know who the current world leaders are: they don’t have amnesia, they’re ghosts. The fic is also rated T, so it would be inappropriate to make any explicit reference to “sexual relations”. None of them play saxophone.

Julie wouldn’t think of Les Mis or Hamilton because Thomas is Regency, not French Revolution, and Kitty is Georgian, not Colonial.

Julie won’t be calling Fanny Mary Poppins because she is perpetually stuck in a white dress, doesn’t wear a hat, doesn’t own an umbrella or a purse and was not the nanny or housekeeper of Button House.

The ghosts will not discuss the marvels of modern transportation or how long it would’ve taken to cross the Atlantic on dinghy because the ghosts have seen Friends. The house irl is on a flight path. They know airplanes exist. Alison and Mike pulled up in a car.

I will probably have the phantoms and Willie talk to Pat and Julian about being from the ‘80s and ‘90s. That I will actually probably do.

The Captain will not mention FD Roosevelt because, again, they all know who the current world leaders are, and I doubt he expects a ‘90s pop punk band to have any insider knowledge on the man.

It was interesting to think of the phantoms’ grandparents having been alive during WW2. I wasn’t lying. But there is nearly nothing I can do with this information.

But above all: both sets of ghosts have already adapted to modern life. Because the shows are shorter, and meant to actually be able to fit jokes in them.

If you want to see any of this, write your own damn fic. I don’t own the concept of a JATP/BBC Ghosts crossover.

What you will not do, “consonant-vowel-consonant-vowel”-nim, is hound me on multiple accounts and then change platform to hound me again. I’m absolutely not having it.

I have never received an interaction quite like this before, and I cannot help but wonder if this is because this is my first work in the Ghosts/HH/Them There/Six Idiots/Yonderland/Bill fandom: that this is where you primarily camp out.

So it’s at this point I ask the Them There/Six Idiots fandom if they have/if they know anyone who has had a run-in with this person or thinks they may have, or if anyone perhaps even knows who this is? Maybe I’m just one of many. Maybe this is a necessary fandom evil I was unaware of.

This experience has left me royally freaked out, as one might imagine, especially since my anxiety in general has been acting up due to it being exam season. I want to thank everyone who’s read my rambles on Discord and on here and even listened to them irl and offered support from the bottom of my heart.

I’ve enabled comment moderation on the fic. I will continue to write it, and I will put exactly what I, and only what I, want in it.

Believe it or not, I wanted to do literally anything else today.

Anon: Fucking Leave Me Alone.

Update: Just reiterating: Carl is not Mimi or Lulu. Carl is a cool dude and I want to sincerely apologise for having brought him into this mess, passing judgment on his character, and making him feel like he should stop practicing English online.

[deepdowninshipperhell]

Thank you @imnotheretodie for tagging me!

Tag 9 people who you want to get to know better!

Favourite piece of clothing you own?

A lovely goth dress with a corset and a long lace-y skirt, it was the first proper goth dress I ever bought for myself and I love it.

Favourite time of the year?

Winter!!! I love winter activities, I love the cold, I love it when it’s dark outside, and I really, really love snow!

Favourite song?

Don’t really have one! My favourite song changes all the goddamn time. There is one song that currently makes me feel really warm simply bc my partner said the first part made them think a lot of us, and they had it playing a lot in the background the last time I visited, so now it’s my I Love My Partner song. Anyway, the song is Cold, Cold Man by Saint Hotel, and it’s not my typical type of music but it does fill me with so much affection.

Comfort food?

A nice Sauerkraut bake! <3

Do you collect something?

Books. I read a LOT, so I don’t just collect books to have them stand on my shelf, I collect books that I know I’ll open time and time again. So truly, why wouldn’t I spend money on a nice version?

Favourite drink?

Probably mulled wine or hot chocolate for warm drinks, love a good orange juice as far as cold drinks go.

Favourite fanfic?

This deserves a whole fucking list, oh my God. I’ll try to keep it to my absolute top favourites, so a maximum of three and ideally just one per fandom.

Okay, buckle up, I’m gonna start with ice hockey rpf, go into Haikyuu, then Spirk, Hannibal, and I’ll end on F1, this’ll be a ride. And by ride I mean it’ll be a fucking list. I’m gonna expose my whole ass here. I read for over 30 fandoms very regularly, by the way, and have well over 4k bookmarks, so be glad I’ve narrowed it down this much.

I’m sorry but I’m also not.

Ice Hockey RPF

More Things In Heaven And Earth - this one is, hands down, my favourite. I’ve read it like forty or fifty times. I don’t know what exactly about it just makes me lose my sanity, but this fanfic. This fanfic. I cannot get enough of it. I think about it every day of my life. All of the works of this author are worth a try, by the way, because goddamn.

Linsky’s Werewolf Series - I love everything Linsky has ever written, like much like with RainyForecast I have read every single fic, but this series specifically is my favourite, especially the Tyler/Jamie and the SidGeno works, I have also read them an unholy amount.

To Happily Ever After (and a Cup or two) - I think about this one a lot. Every time I re-read my favourite ice hockey fics, this is an absolute must read.

Haikyuu

When The Stars Threw Down Their Spears - this one. This Goddamn fic. Kuroken, of course, and it makes me feral. Is it the best-written thing I’ve ever read? No. Is it the one that has had the longest lasting impact on me within all of the over one thousand Haikyuu fics I’ve read? Yes. Yes, by far. I think about this fic at least once a week. ‘Changing a culture,’ changed me, as a person. I would personally kiss the author on the mouth in a sign of thanks.

Star Trek, specifically: Spirk

(this was by far the hardest one to narrow down, because I have many favourites that make me feral but I don’t have a singular fic that leaves all others in its shadow. So for this one and this one only you’re getting a great many more fics than three, and they’re not in any particular order either, but all of these mage me feel absolutely unhinged. Sorry?)

The Third Wheel - a masterpiece. Like every other fic on this list I’ve read it countless times. Sometimes AOS and asshole Jim can have some rights, but it’s only for fics like this

Bang A Gong - probably the one I’ve read the most times out of this entire Spirk list. I think about it a lot. One scene in particular which I won’t spoil.

How We Are (but not how we’re going to be) - this fic fucking ruined me. It did. It ruined me. This one. This one. AOS rights once more and also god fucking damnit this is the ONE ‘enemies’ to lovers Spirk fic I will accept. This fic. This goddamn fic. I would love to be coherent but I’m not I think about this fic so much. I think about it SO much. It has absolutely ruined me. If you read just one fic from this list make it this one.

Inside The River - arranged marriage my beloved. A fucking masterpiece <3

Something Smart To Do - Fake dating absolute fucking idiots. They’re so dumb. I love them so much.

The Bond - anyone who knows me knows I despise amnesia fic. This is the one exception to this rule. This fic. This goddamn fic. I do not have the words I just know it makes me feel so much they’re so in love I’m not okay. And menace Nyota my beloved

Translating Ennoia - You want Spock’s POV for once? You want to see Spock be stupidly in love? You want instant t’hy’la connections but a fucking build up to the payoff?? This. This fic.

As You Wish - Q appears in this one. Do I have to say more. Do I.

Hannibal

What Dreams Series - read this series. Do it. Read it. I’ve read these two fics so many times, they’re SO good, I was so floored by them I ended up buying all of the author’s original books because I thought if you can make me feel this way then I need every single one of your works. Anyway. This goddamn series.

With a Crown of Stars - wishbabies trope but make it Hannigram??? We love to see it. Anyway this one has it all. Babies, possessiveness, murder, violence, Hannigram being stupidly in love, just the whole mix. I’ve read this fic many a time and will read it many a time more.

The Fox’s Wedding - I really like this fic. I really do. The symbolism in it is so nice, and you can really see how much the author thought about it; every small detail has such a big impact and significance.

Formula 1

the rounds and a sound - absolutely unrivalled number one. This one. This one. Yes, it’s Maxiel, but most of all it’s an incredible piece of writing and I think about it a whole lot. There are a handful of f1 fics I really love, but this one is just. Beyond compare. For me personally.

quench your thirst and chase the high - this one makes me feel feral. Yes, it’s smut, but it has feelings. I actually cried reading this fic, it’s incredible

Okay!!! After all of that I’m not gonna tag nine people, but I will tag @geooooooorge and @theizzyryder in case you wanna do this!

[aubrey-plaza]

I've seen a lot of fic rec lists lately given everything happening. Do you have any recommendations to get us through the lock down? p.s. I love everything you write.

omg thanks anon!!

I know these are scary times so have here a quick and dirty list of my fave fics starting with Staubrey and then just... veering offcourse. They’re all femslash except the one I marked with an asterisk but yeah. 

as always, I’m not gonna rec my own fics on my this list bc that’s cheating but if you wanna read them pls click this link and that ends the self promo for today lmao

 recs under the cut!

Stacie x Aubrey

Snowbound  

by ACamp_toner / @stepintotherevolve​ (22.171, complete, rated E)

summary: The Bellas go on a ski trip and Staubrey happens

notes: this has amazing smut and features just enough jealousy to spark these two idiots into a meaningful talk. there’s also side bechloe and a healthy dose of humour.  

The Howl

by @tiny-maus-boots​ (30.739, wip/currently being written, AU)

summary: Stacie's pack is forcing her into a corner but Fate has other plans for her - if she doesn't die first.

notes: werewolf!Stacie and vampire!Aubrey who meet on a full moon and fuck. there’s more to it and a great backstory that’s being wonderfully developed (trust me, I’ve been told of the plans and I’m ri-ve-ted). also has some amazing soft moments and a fab spark of heat.  

Prelude in Lydian Mode

by knappster / @ss-staubrey​ (5972, complete)

summary: Remember tonight... for it is the beginning of always.

notes: I will rec this fic til the day I die. It’s such a lovely brand of staubrey and a perfect example of the idiots to lovers trope.  

and the songbirds are singing (like they know the score)

by angelranger (2326, complete)

summary: It came as a slight surprise to Stacie that Aubrey, the same Aubrey who had grown up in a strict and dysfunctional household, was just so good with her daughter.

Bella seemed to unearth a side of Aubrey that was just so unbelievably soft, a side Stacie is almost positive even Aubrey didn’t know existed. But there she is, sat on the carpeted floor in front of the coffee table, sat right next to Bella, drawing outlines for the four year old to colour in.

notes: oh god i love a good, soft bella fic and this one hits all the right notes. it’s sweet and lovely and features singing Bella to sleep which is like. my weakness. go leave some more love on this deserved fic!

Sansa x Margaery

The Crackpots and These Women

by Netgirl_y2k (8089, complete, WEST WING AU)

summary: "You're in charge of press relations," Yara told Margaery, gesturing to Sansa. "Relate.”

summary: yeah you read that fuckin right that’s a West Wing AU. My love for this mashup has no bounds. It’s so perfectly coy, the way I imagine adult Sansa and Margaery would be, combined with the hopeful tinge of WW, and the pining of a somewhat open ended yet hopeful finish. If you like either of these universes, read this.  

Kind Regards

by MsCFH / @hell-much (9835, complete, explicit, part of a series!)

summary: Margaery Tyrell is determined on setting foot in the Northern market of Westeros by establishing a collaboration between the Tyrell Corporation and Stark Incorporated.

The only problem? The likewise gorgeous and stubborn Deputy Managing Director Sansa Stark.

summary: holy hell this fic is amazing. they hate each other SO MUCH. the author has a vibe setting skill that makes me want to weep. the smut is off the charts hot like there are literally no words. go read it and then read the series bc it’s *that good*. please go get your church lady fan before reading because you WILL need it.  

EXTRA NOTE: same author is writing a post-s6 canon compliant fic where Marg is actually still alive and if you’re looking for a full weekend activity, go ahead and binge this one (it’s a wip but is still being updated)

lay all your love on me

by 1once (9498, complete, show-compliant)

summary: It has been eight years since her demise.

But for the world of her, she cannot figure out why. For what? Why was she alive?

notes: i will say just one thing: flower. magic. okay, i’ll say more things. this fic is the redemption show!marg deserved combined with the fun supernatural magicky aspect of flower magic that’s just so in character. reading this fic feels the way a warm cup of tea in your hands on a cold winter’s day does.  

til you come back home

by heart_nouveau (7978, complete, AU - modern setting)

summary: “Using one-night stands to distract myself from my crush on my roommate counts, right?”

-

Margaery Tyrell is an ambitious law student who needs a perfect grade point average if she wants to stay at the top of her class - and she is not going to throw that away by falling for her very attractive, very sweet roommate, one Sansa Stark.

notes: margaery is a moron with feelings aka my favourite type of character.  

Birds of Prey’s Dinah x Helena

Siren Call

by ThanksForListening (3300, complete, part 2 of a series) 

summary: "It always happened in the quiet moments. The early hours of the morning, when the leftover energy from a mission hadn’t quite disappeared yet. The sleepless nights, when memories clawed their way into her mind and wouldn’t let go until her screams released them. The lazy afternoons, when the radio played softly and melodies she’d almost forgotten danced around her lips. It was only when the world went still that Dinah felt her watching.

She didn’t remember the first time she noticed it. The staring. Maybe it was because Helena was always watching everything and everyone around them that Dinah didn’t realize how frequently that attention fell on her. How it felt different. Helena looked at the world with suspicion and anger and indifference, but not her. She looked at her with something much softer, something she hadn’t found a name for just yet. No word in her arsenal was deep enough or strong enough to describe it.

Whatever it was, she could feel it now.”

notes: gahhhhh this fic. “What do you see,” she finally asked, “when you look at me?” is a line that I’m gonna think about until the day I die. this is the second fic in a series and you can read it as a standalone but the first fic is also fuckin amazing

after the afterparty

by novoaa1 (1181, complete, set right after the movie ends)

summary: The Canary had let loose a delighted snort at that, as if she found the whole thing somehow laughable.

(Which it wasn’t, to be clear—laughable, that is.)

“Are y'all seeing this shit?” she’d turned to ask the rest of them, earning a giddy squeal from Harley and a bemused scoff from Montoya even whilst Helena remained stock still in place, dutifully blinding herself with one hand. “Absolutely adorable.”

“Shut up,” Helena had hissed back more out of instinct than anything else, though her tone was markedly devoid of any real anger.

(And if Helena had felt her cheeks flush ever so slightly beneath her palm at the Canary’s glib assertion, she certainly didn’t let on.)

Or: Sionis falls. The rest of them remain.

notes: just. read it.  

knew your love (before i kissed you)

by z0ejake / @zxyjxy (58.263, wip / currently being written, rated E for the last chapter)

summary: Surviving the massacre of your entire family at the age of eight is a pretty impressive feat. Training for fifteen years in Sicily until you can kill a man with one hand and a hairpin is also a pretty impressive feat. Returning to the city where your family was cut down and killing every single person involved in their deaths is maybe the most impressive feat. Somehow, it's never been enough for Helena.

notes: bro this fic is a masterpiece and zoe is a genius. features absolute moron feral dumb jock helena and my favourite version of dinah: patient and endeared and a little teasing.  

the war is over (and we are beginning)

by ace_verity (12.573, 5/5, complete)

summary: The thing is, Helena has no idea what comes after.

The past fifteen years, she’s had a singular goal. She's never given any thought to what she’d do once she killed the men who murdered her family in front of her.

Maybe, Helena realizes, she never actually thought she’d make it this far.

—

In which Helena Bertinelli joins a team, buys a cactus, beats up criminals, goes to church, bakes bread, and falls in love.

(Not necessarily in that order.)

notes: this fic is beautiful and perfectly explores a lost Helena. I also love the way Renee is written in this and the whole vibe of the story is just *chefs kiss*

cheap shampoo

by OfElvesAndAliens (1609, complete)

summary: The thing is, Helena is a rigidly focused kind of gal, iron rage forged into skilled precision. Dinah has also noticed it in the little things, like the way she frowns a bit when she's doing something as trivial as writing, her penmanship always neat and firm. That same tiny furrow of her brow is showing up again while she's methodically whisking some eggs in a bowl.

Dinah finds it cute. Fucking sue her.

notes: oh god but i love a bedsharing fic and this one? feeding and post-mission and just winding down together??? ohhhh my god

two extra random goodies just for fun:

Lamplighter

by the_years_between_us (116.915, wip, rated E)

show/ship: The Fall, Stella Gibson/Reed Smith

summary: Stella gets a call from Reed directly following the final episode of The Fall S3.

notes: this is one of only a handful of wips that I’m keeping up with and reading constantly. It’s written like goddamn poetry and I love an older ship with more baggage, because the emotions here run so much higher with their shared history and the tentative steps they’re trying to take. Also, given the source material, this is almost cathartic to read.  

Nothing to Lose*

by tielan (8013, complete, rated E)

fandom/ship: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Maria Hill/Steve Rogers

summary: “It’s one of the traditional rituals of manhood,” Natasha observes as they’re sparring. “Kill a man, fuck a woman.”

notes: listen. i know. okay? i know this seems like a crackship. but I love it SO MUCH and this author writes so well that I’ve been fully converted. ~something some of you have told me I do for you~ so go read this fic, and then read the others, and then fall in love and join me in this lonely ship. You won’t regret it.  

I’ll be writing while in isolation so if you have any Dinah/Helena or Stacie/Aubrey prompts, shoot ‘em my way!

and also hit me up for anything, as always. 

peace and love, and stay safe everybody!

[obdurare-archive-blog]

how do you feel about dmtnt?

Lmao oh. Oh, gosh, anon I. /sweatsOkay, yeah, no. I’m glad it’s breathed life into this fandom that I hold nearest and dearest to my heart. I’m glad to see more people in it and talking about it and drawing fanart for it (like this one bc I am not a Sparossa fan at all but the art is lovely and it’s still cute even it’s not my thing and I now subscribe to the headcanon of Hector with full-body freckles). Like I’m glad to see new people come in, and old people return. Feels like home again. I’m glad it’s made so many people happy.ALSO LET ME PREFACE BY SAYING: These are my feelings on the film. In no way do I feel this way about any DMTNT rpers or their interpretations on my dash. You guys are all fucking fabulous with what you’ve done, and I am here to play with you all, no matter how I feel about the source material. You’ve done an amazing fucking job with what you were given and I am in awe of every last one of you. Which goes to show how I feel means not a fiddly fuck, because you guys are giving pure gold. And know that if you wanna ever do a thing, just hit me up. Because I don’t give a good goddamn, we’ll figure it out. I want to write with you. Keep rocking the fuck as hard as you do, and know each of you are here because I want you to be.HOWEVER I have a lot of issues with this film.

I haven’t been shy about my issues with characterization and canon non-compliance within the film. And I’m not about to start now. Me? I hated it. There were a couple of things that rang true to me, that sounded IC to me, but on the whole I felt like it was a tangled, disjointed mess of a movie. But also understand I’m looking at it from a I really love my boy and how does this even work in actual canon standpoint. I think I’d be a lot happier with it if it were treated - in fandom - like a soft reboot with no bearing on the original trilogy? It could work that way. But as it stands, there’s just so much that directly contradicts 14 years of standing canon, I can’t love it, and I can’t really use it.So from a Hectormun perspective:Hector is hollow in this movie. I know a lot of people have feels about him, but from a squinting at his character from every angle view that I have, he doesn’t sound like himself. The Hector Barbossa I know and love would never hide in his cabin with a private band. The Hector Barbossa I know and love is an active, working captain, who is boots on deck at eight bells and out and about amongst his crew. Because he understands that his position as captain only lasts as long as they want him to be captain. He’s vain, but he’s not really flashy. His biggest physical vanity is his hat, and even then it’s feathers in muted, natural colors. He wears old and tattered clothes because that’s not what’s important to him. He doesn’t trim his beard because fuck what Jack thinks, have you seen Jack? He’s a walking disaster.From a character perspective, I have a hard time believing a man who baby talks his pet monkey could leave a daughter of his at an orphanage. Especially an orphanage of the 18th Century. I have a hard time thinking that he would let other people take the experiences from him of braiding his daughter’s hair and reading her bedtime stories. Say what you want about Hector - he’s a hard man - but once he loves, he loves just as hard. And if you don’t think he’d love his baby girl more than anything on the planet you are wrong. It would probably be the first time he’d experience the want to put someone else before his own desires and wants. I’m sorry, I just literally cannot buy he’d do this. Maybe it’s wanting to believe he’s better than what he is, but I don’t think so. I’m eyes-open on the things he’s done for survival. Aware of how terrible he can actually be. But as attached as he gets to his pets, and how the compass pointed to her the entire time he held it, I cannot believe he wouldn’t have had her literally strapped to his fucking side the moment she was born.I have issues with Jack. I have issues how we go from “I’ve never actually been that drunk,” to slurring his words, when Jack has never been like that. Ever. In four movies, and about twenty books. I have issues with Jack demanding tribute. @pearlsparable has written a great thing here about it, you should go check it out. Pirate captains do not demand tribute, or they do not remain captain for very long. I have issues with the production value, too, but that’s another thing entirely. I have massive issues with the change in how Jack got the Wicked Wench. It’s so integral to who he is I feel like changing it cheapens his character so much. It takes away so much depth the original storyline gave him. I have a lot of PoF love, y'all, you’ll pry it from my cold, dead hands. I also have issues with the compass giving. This whole thing has been built around him bartering it from Tia Dalma, and it cheapens her and him to rewrite it because…I haven’t figured out why. I feel like this whole script could have used a cursory wiki check.I have issues with Will and his being a morose bastard about things. Will knew the duty. Will knew he was more suited than Jack to do the duty. Remember that talk on the Pearl? “You have to do the job, Jack. Or end up just like Jones.” Will was meant for the duty. “A touch of destiny.” Tia Dalma knew, too, I believe, when she she laid eyes on him. Also lots of issues with how Henry (I’m sorry, babes, they should have kept with the Williams and this one should have been Willie, Henry jars really bad for some reason) is kind of. Left to swim back to his own boat. I have problems with Henry not being given any depth when he could have been so much more. Like there was so much potential in this film and it all feels flat.I feel like Salazar was so much wasted potential. As is, he’s still great, those special effects are hell unnerving and fucking zombie sharks, I am always here for zombie sharks. But I feel like he could have been expanded on so much more. Look at Hector from CotBP. That’s how you write a sympathetic villain. And Salazar tries to reach that same level of writing craft, but it’s not a fault of Javier Bardem, who is fabulous, but a fault of a shitty script that left him filling in too many details. I’ve seen rpers here who do a much better job of giving him depth and feeling and a solid feeling than that script did. So kudos to you guys for being awesome, too. You’ve made him into what he should have been, and I’m so grateful to see so many talented people picking up the slack there.I’m disappointed in the handling of this romance of Hector’s. She’s a name. A throw away line. If she’s someone Hector Barbossa fell in love with, then she was someone worth remembering. That I promise you. She should have been more than that.I’m angry that the writers can’t seem to write an intelligent female, apparently, so everyone else feels a bit dumbed down to compensate. I’m angry, because this is Hector Barbossa’s fucking daughter and they wrote her so blandly and I saw nothing at all of him in her and I wanted to. I wanted her to be as witty as she’s supposed to be. I want her to be everything she was supposed to be. I’m fucking pissed they give Hector this backstory that 1. doesn’t really jive with original canon and 2. do nothing to actually explain it, on top of short-servicing what should have been the two most important people in his life. You don’t give my boy this and tear it from him two seconds later. You don’t. I’m so glad to see so many good Carinas out there fixing this, making her everything she’s meant to be and more. I’m so glad. I know I can count on fandom when the official source fucks up.I’m super fucking pissed a lot of this with Hector was for a tortuted metaphor. I get why it’s supposed to be super feelsy, but for Hector’s character in totality it makes no sense. I’m angry his death was actually pointless as hell. I know it’s Geoffrey Rush bowing out, he’s said he’s done now, but I’m still mad.I’m just mad, anon. I’m mad I waited this long for this movie, and this is what I got. One that doesn’t even make sense with the rest of the canon and treats all the characters like cardboard pieces that can be moved with no autonomy. One that could have been amazing with a cursory continuity check and some better writers (we also almost had Russio back and I’m salty af about that, too). This movie is an example of something that could have been a wonderful chapter ending, that ended up a goddamn disaster.  I’m mad for all of us, because I feel like we all deserved better.Now that I’ve said all that, lemme say this. You DMTNT rpers? Keep doin’ what you do. Because you guys are 10000% better than the writers of this movie. You’ve actually given these characters some life, so I’m so glad to know each and every one of you. I may not be canon compliant for your guys for all of the above, but that never means I don’t want to write with you. Like I say in my rules, hey. My Hector won’t really have a clue who you are, but he’ll roll with it. And so will I. You guys are 100% welcome here, always. In no way is this a reflection on you, or your quality. Because I wouldn’t be following you if you weren’t quality, and you can take that to the bank like money.

[muggycuphead]

TH!FPA_VB – Lord of Lies and Deceiving

Yo, been a while since I posted something on this account, but here we are, back at it again with a casual VB drawing like in good ol’ 2020

…Though, this time things got built on a different road of events as you can see, not to mention this is a spoiler to what’s to come for VB (but tbh I stopped caring at this point so yea)

First and for most however, there are quite a few questions surrounding this fic’s development I have to answer for our sake (mostly mine since I feel like mold spaghetti for not keeping up on things oml-)

Yes, I once said VB was on the way of getting completed and all that, I know

Problem is, the changes I want to do to the ‘lore’ (if you want to call it that way idk) are also retroactive to the events in the present timeline (aka past events that are mentioned but not entirely shown because ugh-), some characters that have some relevancy on the story but only come up at the very end chapters on VB itself, etc. etc. which are things that I personally find bothersome as its writer and the reason why I’d rather not make the ‘sequel-prequel’ of it where things get explained and all that

Instead, I’ll fuse both VB and TAF (the sequel-prequel’s name acronym standing for ‘The ‘ANOMALY’ files’ fyi) so it can focus on one party alone and I don’t waste any more time than what I already have done so (haha funny cuz me late to party amiriteeeimsorry-)

…And about the format for it, I’ve decided I’ll ‘upgrade’ it to a comic instead since y’know, I do art and it’ll also make my writing simpler so yea

Still tho, I’m kinda paranoic on if I should get going with the prologue by the time I finish its script or not since I don’t wanna make the plot a mess or leave things (important* things) unfolded by accident, but we’ll see how it goes (and hopefully I’ll make it out alive-)

Also, keep in mind that by the moment I’m writing this, I’m stuck in the Friday Night Fuc- I mean Funkin’ fandom, and y’all know what happens when the fandom switching happens…

My concept-creation-obssessive-self starts grinding gears like cuckoo -doesn’t mean I’ll abandon everyone else tho, it’s just that my focus splits on multiple parts and all that balloney

So, now that I did my little defense statement up there, let’s get rolling to the mainpoint down here

First, who’s this spider guy?

Well, he’s a ‘side’ antagonist, more specifically the person DPM is after (but doesn’t realize he is until very later)

His name is Q-Ross Sid, a ‘camel spider’ that lives in the Spider Kingdom as the royal executioner and prison head-guard/-caretaker

He’s what I’d consider to be an ‘anomaly’, since he’s a genetic fusion of graphite (20%), chalk (10%) and correcting fluid (70%), with the graphite being his ‘stabilizer’ component (osseous structure and skin/muscular tissue mostly) and the chalk his ‘cooler’ component (mostly on his defense and assimilation mechanism), not to mention he can only consume either correcting fluid matter derivatives…and/or ink matter derivatives, including living beings (mostly as an energy source and which his body somehow can partially convert into graphite)

…And by that fact alone you can tell that yes, he killed Isea -also known as Dizzy/Izzy Pants Girl (YESss I fINALLY GAVE HER A NICK ASDFGH-) in VB mostly due to her ‘special ability’ and stuff- by Queen Aris’ command. And yes, he can shapeshift, which explains why he got DPM to blame FPM for what happened, this that (but I think you might have figure it out already by the drawing alone so yea-)

However, although at first I thought his ability would be limited to mimick FPM’s appearance only, I now decided to amplify it a little, and instead he can shapeshift into any sketch/graphite-alike/related being, with FPM being his ‘link’ to them most of the time (stalkey tatics are not okey dokey my man but you do you I guess)

Though he can only shapeshift into stickfigs since he doesn’t have that much of ‘color filling’ for a human drawing itself (yeah ik they’re humanized in the story but things will make sense sooner or later I promise, for now just bear with me as we go on on this plz), and he cannot shapeshift into ink/liquid-alike/related beings because they’re not compatible and it’ll only lead him to corrupt his physical form –not meaning he can’t recover from it tho

But he can’t replicate them entirely, as his eyes and the ring are the two main red flags to spot him (but with some contact lenses and a little pocket, it can be fixed y’know-)

As for his robotic arm, it was after a fight that I’ll rather not explain due to not being that relevant; and even thought doctors refused to give him a prosthesis at first since he could simply let it rebuild naturally (yes he can regen too, but in a slower phase bc reasons), he got it anyways due to the fact limbs regen take way longer than physic injuries and/or internal damage (some even assumed that they probably wouldn’t actually regen anyway), which can be a bother on his job most of the time…and maybe out of spite too –he wanna look tough, yo-

Fun fact, during the hype I got from making this bad boi, I ended up attaching him to grandson’s song called ‘Blood/Water’ due to the lyrics kinda resembling his defamatory actions towards FPM (and also his wild and sometimes desperate hunger towards ink beings, yikes)

Second, what’s VB’s main plotline now and why did I expand it?

To resume it in the ‘signature phrase’ I made for the new version (which was also inspired on MARETU’s ‘Magical Doctor’ song –mandoilovethisvocaloidsongcomposerasdfgh)

**THIS WASN’T MEANT TO HAPPEN**

Venomous Bittersweet (which I’ll rename in the future due to the fusion with TAF) started off with a simple plot -FPM going on a mission for himself to get cured from a spider bite he got all of a sudden, but failing in the process (bc plot convenience idk) and CPG is the one who goes to his rescue instead while showing off the things she learned from him, this that, wholesome ending blah blah blah- you know the drill if you read it to end.

But by the moment I began making those little ‘inside stories’ –specially DPM’s backstory explaining why he became so reckless and outgoing- I started to extent myself on how things worked on this AU, even how drawings come to life (ik it’s weird but that’s how I though it to be so ff-), and by such I felt the urge to give almost everything a background story, such as Aris’ reason to kidnap and take control over FPM’s body and mind (and maybe his soul too oops-), the Spider Kingdom’s origin and even the portals and ‘reality deterioration’ in SFPA, passing by DPM’s origins and stuff.

And even if I felt like hitting walls and taking things a little too in-depth most times, I think it did bring some good things for the new plotline I’m going for now

So, in the new story, all the weird, whacky (and disturbing) things that happen after SFPA and during OG VB plotline came by what I’d express as some sort of ‘time-space anomaly’ that made everything slightly unstable on the ‘other side’ of the studio (I won’t explain too much my brain is about to boil rn so take that as you will for now tysm), having a passive (but not unnoticeable) effect on the sketchbooks.

I can’t give much context why, how or where did the anomaly came to be exactly (you can make theories if you like, I’d love to read them 4real <3), but it’s main purpose is to take control over all existing worlds just to corrupt them to its will, to the point there is basically nothing left but despair and desolation to which all entities will be forced to endure and all that edgy jazz.

…And by that, the ‘anomaly’ will create incompatible matter amalgams –ink and graphite being the most coming-to-mind example in the story so far- in order to conquer all the sketchbooks, but as a consequence of this ‘anomaly’s’ arise, new worlds came to be fully developed (in other words, they finally exist as a whole), and with that, new ‘heroes’ are brought into the situation, each representing a type of artistic material alone –watercolor, oil paint, etc-, heroes with which FPM will encounter and interact with, as he’ll also help them in how to use their abilities to fight the baddies and stuff.

And because we need conflict to make things interesting, Q-Ross and DPM indirectly (but kinda) ‘team up’ to fabricate fake evidence and such in order to mess with FPM’s reputation towards the heroes by incriminating him and/or even mislead his actions (confusing wrong by right and vice versa, etc.) (because ink man is salty and corrector ass is a dick by nature –ofc), and even ocassionally with Q-Ross starting the job, just to get DPM to finish it; and sometimes they get the aforesaid characters to hold grudges –if it comes to succeed, or instead making them get more on his side by the same feeling of doubt –if they mess up on something, no matter the size.

As about his sickness, well, it also got a little twist.

We know that new worlds and material compositions come with new squiggle types, and even if ‘dust-related’ types don’t affect him for too long –chalk being the closest example I can bring up-, liquid or clayish matters, such as oil and crayon squiggles respectively, are toxic towards him, so in the way the more he interacts with incompatible squiggles, the more harmed his health condition gets, to the point it grips into the weakest part of his body –his core (I’ll later explain this just…let me get this out first plz), which limits him on doing most things he’s used to do normally.

…And well, the spider bite (which is also an abnormal matter amalgam times two, though I’ll keep it secret for now) was the last nail in the coffin on fucking him up entirely to a new level of corruption (damn is that a stretch I’m seeing-)

Long story short, this was also because I wanted ArPM to have a backstory that’s more than just ‘I’m evil nao bc me get poisond and mindcontrold by spoders out of spite hahahaha-’

Third (and lastly), who’s Ahetzo exactly and what’s his main purpose on the story?

This is a short one

In case you didn’t see my tweet on my Twitter account (here a linkie), this is a side character I made that’s supposed to be some kind of ‘spirit’ or something alike who’s the one in charge of the studio while ya dev boi is gone

In other words, he’s basically like Brad’s subconscious self (IK YIKES- YOU CAN HIT ME WITH THE CHAIR NOW I WON’T MIND-)

…and even though he tried to keep the anomaly thing contained as long as he could while figuring out how to disarm it or at least neutralize it (yes it was there way before, like during fpaw3 events or before so because AU logic lol), the more he tried to condense it, the more it multiplied itself until, well, y’know, shit blew up and everything just sdfghjk’d

And yes, he was the one who released the new worlds to keep the crazy stuff at range, this that

Oml my brain-

And before I finish here, I’d like to make a little ‘self-critic’ regarding my artwork here…and I gotta say, I’m really proud of it on most parts

As I began to retake on digital art lately –mostly due to my slight entering onto the FNF/partially NG communities and other things, I’ve been testing out new techniques and stuffs on GIMP 2 with the ‘routes’ tool and all that (that’s also why it looks almost symmetrical, but don’t fool urself it did took its time-), I even corrected some of the lines to make them sharp and fancy (haha funi joek im so quirkee-)

In here, I wanted to try mixing both solid and blurry shadows as well as replicating a ‘crystalish’ effect –as seen on Q-Ross’ eyes- and some line effects with the ink tool such as the liquid dripping out of Q’s mouth (yes that correcting fluid saliva now stfu-) and the graphite/correctfluid webs coming out of his clawtips/fingertips

And though I haven’t made an official palette for him, I think the colors I picked here suit him well enough in my own idea of such

Overall, I had fun making this, and I love how it came out

Still though, any criticism, opinion and commentary is welcome, both about my art piece and my little showcase over here

That’s all I got for now, see you all later on

K bai-

[fangsmyth]

GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER.

can be used for RP  &&  non-RP blogs to get to know a bit about the person behind the screen

1. FIRST NAME  :  quinn or byleth i’m good w either

2. STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF  :  i’m so flexible it literally hurts my joints and was once mistaken for rheumatoid arthritis

3. TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON  :  dyed hair, good somft cheeks, freckles...... Freckles 😳

4. A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF  :  pasta

5. A FOOD YOU HATE  :  uh... most??? but fr oysters disgust me

6. GUILTY PLEASURE  :  making too many ocs!!!!

7. WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN  :  whatever. sometimes just my undies sometimes nothing sometimes pjs i could be wearing a garbage bag and sleep just fine

8. SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS  :  i mean i’d LIKE a relationship but my confidence petrifies the souls of many

9. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE,  WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE  :  not go to scad i’ll tell you that for free

10. ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON  :  oh absolutely not

11. A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN  :  promare........

12. FAVORITE BOOK  : And Then There Were None, The Vampire Lestat

13. YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE  :  axolotl!

14. TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS   (  IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG  ,  YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL  )  :  i ain’t tellin like 80% of my ships are ocs/canon or ocs/ocs it takes a village

15. PIE OR CAKE  :  caaaaake

16. FAVORITE SCENT  :  frankincense... or dragon’s blood... pretty much any kind of incense

17. CELEBRITY CRUSH  :  lil nas x don’t judge just flip through his twitter account

18. IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO  :  roooome? japaaaaan? h

19. INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT  :  you see i thought i was an ambivert but then i was told i couldn’t leave my house so i guess i’m an extrovert apparently bc this shit SUCKS

20. DO YOU SCARE EASILY  :  yeah don’t fucking touch me with your jumpscares or bugs i got killed by a tarantula in animal crossing and haven’t touched the game since

21. IPHONE OR ANDROID  :  i’m a clown i could go either way

22. DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES  :  oh too many i’ve been playing ffxiv a lot, i still kind of like league, i have my heart set on getting back into playing disco elysium and whispers of a machine soon, backstage pass was underrated, bastion has stuck with me for 27 slutty, slutty years

23. DREAM JOB  :  ideally a ux/narrative designer for a game development company, but even better if it’s a company that i founded and am running

24. WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS  :  mooove to toronto and set up shop there. maybe travel a bit?

25. FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE  :  not gonna put out any names bc i love myself and don’t wanna get killed but with every modern fire emblem game there’s at least one character that’s really popular that i Cannot stand

26. FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER  :  oh god trauma center i lowkey miss those games though

tagged by  :  idr when i snatched this it was in my drafts and i’m trying to avoid the work i have over break

tagging  : whoever wants to fuckin do it what am i your dad