#only seems fair they'll both be judged for it

[limi-strology]

My astro observations:

I'm by no means an expert, this is based on my experience!

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☄. *. ⋆*·˚ Leo suns are pretty warm people. I mean it as in they make you feel welcome in a new place and try to help you socialize with their friends. Even though they are really popular and usually in the center, they'll talk to you, pay attention to how you're feeling and encourage you to talk more in the group! It may put you on the spot, but that's how they show they care. I find it really sweet, they just want to help you get out there and approach people. They're great friends, especially if you were around toxic people previously, these fellas will kinda heal you in a way ❤️‍🩹

☄. *. ⋆ Leo risings also have a confident vibe surrounding them. Even those who are more on the introverted side give off the impression that they are quite dynamic? Idk how to explain this, they just kind of stand out. I think it's more obvious when they're with their closest friends, they're usually the ones cracking jokes, being loud, taking up a more leader-like(?) role. Part time entertainers, part time hype people. You go guys, let's keep up the fun vibes in our friend groups ☀️

☄. *. ⋆ Libras are so charming for no reason?? Like, both personality and appearance wise, I'm amazed. I love how they always listen to both sides of the story and try to find solutions that are fair to everyone. They're generally sweet and angelic, they tend to forgive a lot (don't you think they'll forget it tho, they'll probably be more cautious around you afterwards) up until you hurt them deeply. After that, they get sarcastic and cold, you do not want to get on their bad side. Regarding their physical appearance, I've noticed a lot of them have full lips and freckles (or multiple beauty marks on their face). I'm getting a cute energy just by looking at them, I don't know why, I just found every Libra I've met so far adorable in a way. Sure, they're mostly described as handsome and beautiful (and they are, not gonna lie) but I'm just seeing an innocent? youthful and carefree image of them. Also they're kinda curvy? Even the more lean ones are a little thick in the booty or thighs. 🤭

☄. *. ⋆ I've noticed Scorpios suddenly becoming really soft and smiley around kids and pets. They'll start cooing and waving at the kids, might even talk or play with them (if they know them well). Similarly, they'll get excited at the sight of a puppy or a kitten and will probably pet them and give them snacks. And what amazes new even more is that kids and pets seem to like them back! I don't know what it is about Scorpios and their energy, but I've seen so many babies/toddlers staring and smiling at my Scorpio peers in fascination, and whenever we encounter stray animals they seem to gravitate towards them. It's really cute to see that, warms my heart a lot. Like, intimidating who? I'm only seeing cute happy people ☺️

☄. *. ⋆ Capricorn moons have a hard time opening up about things that bother them. Even if they feel the most comfortable with you, they'll most likely hide some things. They'll talk about it eventually, but they'll probably reveal small parts of it each time, kinda like building a puzzle but taking many breaks in between. Maybe they feel like they can be judged and/or mocked and want to see how others react first? I hope you guys are surrounded by sweet and accepting people that you can trust and share things that trouble you with them 🤍

☄. *. ⋆ I used to think Aries placements make you more hot-headed/aggressive, but the more people I've met, I've realised they're more on the ambitious side. Strong willed, they know exactly what they want. Sometimes their parents may pressure them into studying something they think is best for them during college, and the Aries person will probably do that, but then they'll do the thing that truly interests them. I noticed Aries suns are quite fit and enjoy any kind of exercise/sports, it just makes them feel good, while Aries risings are mostly attracted to athletic people, or are fascinated by people who go to the gym. They also have a fiery, self empowering aura going on and I love that for them 🔥

☄. *. ⋆ Scorpio venuses, wowww... Okay, first of all, your loyalty is so admirable. And the fact that you always try to find solutions and maintain peace in your relationships, especially the men with this placement, I'm impressed every time 👏 I'm getting Morticia Adams vibes, and by that I mean that I'm seeing elegance with dark themes. Also, in formal/party settings, guys look great in all black outfits and girls rock red lipstick. I know it sounds a bit generic, but it makes you stand out from the rest, even if everyone is dressed practically the same. It's like you're just in your element 🤌

☄. *. ⋆ My fellow sun square moon people, how are we feeling? Do you also have that mind vs heart battle on a weekly basis? Like being two different people at once, with one being more assertive and independent (Sun) and the other more sensitive and insecure (Moon). Your upbringing could be genuinely good, with no one really hurting you deeply, yet you still struggle with your emotions and might have low self confidence. Probably people pleasers, even if your mind is telling you to do your own thing instead, you will probably have a hard time saying no. And don't get me started on this whole conflict of what you want exactly. You finally start living on your own like you've always wanted and make time for yourself? Yeah, but why is no one here to pat you on the back and give you reassurance yet? Where's the support? Hate independence. You eventually surround yourself on the daily with people who actually care about you and show you the affection you deserve? Well, now it feels too stuffy in here, let's self isolate from all the people we love until we feel horrible again because of loneliness. Don't know how else to describe it than just 🙃.

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Thanks for reading! It's my first time making an observation post so I'm sorry if it's not that accurate, I'm basing this on people who are close to me and whose chart I've checked a few times.

Hope you have a nice day~

[petitprincess1]

What critiques do you have of Hazbin? I'm wondering because I keep seeing a lot of criticism and hate towards it and I don't Wana get into something that's possible waste of time. Srry if thats rude

Dude, you're perfectly fine. I'm gonna keep it to like five points bc some things that I have problems with are mainly nitpicks. None of this, imo, is a dealbreaker for me. However, if it is for you, fair.

This is one that everyone has talked about and I fully agree with. The pacing is whiplash-inducing. I still do believe it's better than HB S1, but there is just so much information being thrown around that it's mind-boggling. The songs definitely help to slow things down a bit and introduce more info in an engaging, catchy way. However, I feel like there were some eps that either needed to come sooner or later in the series. I get they were fighting the clock, but still.

Lucifer and Charlie's relationship needed better explaining. Without going into spoilers, from what it felt like in the Pilot, it seemed like they were building up to something a bit more confrontational. I always figured Charlie possibly embellished Lucifer's words, but now it makes it feel like Charlie was talking to a completely different man. Someone that isn't even her father. Lu acts so much like Charlie, or vice versa, that it seems almost impossible to misinterpret his words.

NO FILLERS! The closest episode to a filler is the 3 ep, but even that brings up information and moves the plot along with key points. Now, that's not a bad thing entirely. It keeps you engaged. But this show very much lacks any breathing room. There's so much being thrown your way. Either things get overly talked about or not talked about enough. Which brings me to my next point-

The world-building is both fulfilling and empty. You do get a good sense of Heaven and Hell in this universe, especially Hell. You get an idea of the hierarchy and even some hypocrisy. However, we also don't really know how Heaven nor Hell operates. Like Lucifer appeared to be a shut-in. Yes, Lilith was the one inspiring demonkind, but what about when she disappeared? Is that why everything is garbage now? How much does Lucifer influence Hell? Where are the archangels? Was this conflict not important? Is there a "God" even in this show? What is Heaven's hierarchal system? There's so much being said, while also nothing being explained.

This one is the lowest for me bc I'm a bit torn on it. I've seen a few people complain about how the main characters are introduced as if you're supposed to know them. I didn't get this feeling, but I'm also a fan of Hazbin. I try to go in with a fairly "empty mind" so that I can view the material without rose-tinted glasses. However, it felt like some of the characters were given decent introductions at times. Idk. I'd like to know other's opinions on that.

Another one that I want to add is probably more diversity in the body sizes in the show. I'm not too worried about it bc Helluva Boss does a great job with body diversity, but Hazbin seems to be fairly stick and slender. But, again, I'm not too worried about it.

All in all, those are my biggest issues with the show. Like I said, none of these are dealbreakers, especially since we'll be getting a S2. Vivzie seems to listen to criticism, judging by the differences with HB S1 vs S2. So, I'm really hoping that we finally get to relax and actually get to know the characters more. Like, Adam shows the 7 Deadly Sins, while Charlie shows the 7 Virtues. I hope Adam isn't permanently dead bc I feel like this would be a good wake-up for him. He'll become the being that they were exterminating. But only time will tell.

Majority of this can be blamed on Prime and A24 for only giving them 8 episodes. I feel like either a longer run-time or more eps would've helped the show. Hopefully, they'll have learned from their mistakes in the next season.

[chaoticbeanz]

Hellfire's Girl

Summary- A new girl moves to Hawkins and has already made an impression. 

Pairing- Eddie Munson x Fem!oc

Warnings- friends to lovers, slow burn, she/her pronouns, cursing, mainly nickname will be used, 

Notes- This is my first Eddie fic. Also, I will be straying from the storyline. Please don't forget to comment. I'd love to hear feedback.

Masterlist

~Lena~

Moving to Hawkins wasn't as bad as I had originally thought. Sure it sucks that I had to leave, but knowing I was only about 3 hours away from my friends made me feel better about it.

Starting my senior year in a new high school on the other hand… blows.

Well, it would have if I cared about fitting in. Back home no one judged. But here? Oh boy did they. I had to keep some of my hobbies on the down low, for now at least. Apparently, Dungeons and Dragons was considered “Devil worshipping”. So much for me trying to find people to teach me how to play. Or so I thought. Barely one week in Hawkins High is all it took for me to make a friend. Or a few.

~English class~

I was sitting in the back because I couldn't pay attention today. I was a passing student so I wasn't worried. 

As I tuned out the teacher, I started doodling on what should've been my notes. The only thing on my mind was smoking my last joint that was tucked away in my car. I was unconsciously drawing clouds around the leaf I had made on my paper.

“Hey, New girl.” I heard whispers next to me. Turning my head to see a boy wearing a shirt with the words “Hellfire Club”. Maybe it was a new band?

“Do you partake or just like drawing?”

This felt like a trick question. Was he trying to get me caught or being friendly? I've learned quickly not to trust anyone yet. The jocks and the cheerleaders are the royalty in the ranks. Any lower on the food chain and you're a target no matter what.

He felt my hesitation to the question so he continued, “I only ask because if you need “flower”- he points to my picture- I know a guy.”

That sounds even more suspicious! I lean in slightly whispering, “You do realize how that sounds like a total set up right? Why should I trust you?”

The boy puts his hands up in defense.“That's fair. But wouldn't me asking you just be me outing myself? Why would I rat both of us out?”

“Touche.”

“I’m Gareth by the way.”

“Lena. And hypothetically if I were to say I had “flower”. Would you partake?”

“Uh Duh.” We both laughed silently.

“You seem pretty cool Gareth.” I could tell that took him by surprise but he tried to cover it up. 

“Uh, thanks. So do you.” he paused for a second “Would you wanna come sit with me and my friends during lunch? I can't guarantee that you'll think they'll be as cool as me but…” I giggled.

“I’d love to. And trust me if they're like you I'll like them way better than the “royalty”.”

With that said the bell had rung, dismissing everyone for lunch. I put my notebook in my bag seeing Gareth standing in the corner of my eye. Like he's waiting for me. How sweet.

“I have to put some stuff in my locker. You can go ahead and I'll find you.” I smiled at him. He nodded his head but looked unsure. Like he thought I was lying about sitting with them. Nonetheless, he walks out of the room towards the lunch room while I head to my locker.

~3rd Person~

As Gareth walked to the lunch room, he thought about Lena. Was she being serious about sitting with them? Regardless he would have to mention her to his friends. Even if she didn't sit with them she was one of the good ones.

As he walks through the doors, a roar of multiple conversations bounces off the walls. He grabs his lunch and then heads to his table with his dungeon master and best friend seated at the head of the table.

The kiddies arrived just as he sat down. Now was his chance.

“Hey guys, I invited the new girl to sit with us.”

Everyone at the table paused as if processing what Gareth had said. Then a chorus of laughs erupted from the group. “I’m serious!”

Eddie wipes a fake tear from his eye. “Good one Gare.”

“Yeah like a girl is gonna sit with us.”Jeff rolls his eyes.

“You're delusional man!”

With Gareth trying to defend himself and the group in denial, they had not noticed Lena approaching their table.

~Lena~

I rushed to my locker to dump whatever I didn't need for my next classes. Then into the bathroom to make sure I didn't look crazy. I wanted to make a good first impression on Gareth's friends. It’d be nice to have real people to hang out with who are not snobby rich fakers.

When I got to the cafeteria I scanned the room to find Gareth while going through the line to just get some fruit. Surprised that they had peaches I grabbed two then spotted Gareth after I paid. 

As I was heading to the table, a blonde cheerleader I met earlier stopped me. I think her name was Chrissy.

“Hey, would you like to sit with me and the girls?” she smiled sweetly.

“Oh thanks but I've got a seat already.” offering her a smile back. I didn't want to hurt her feelings because she seemed like the only genuine popular girl I'd met.

“Oh, that's okay! Maybe next time.” she then walked away to her table.

I started walking again and as I approached the table it seemed like they were arguing about something. Before you could catch what was going on they all fell quiet when you stood in front of their table. Looking at the boy standing at the opposite side of the table. 

~3rd Person~

Eddie was not buying it for one second as soon as the sentence left Gareth's mouth. A new girl sitting with them? The freaks of Hawkins High? Yeah right. But alas Eddie believed that Gareth was committed to the bit til he had enough. He stood from his chair and slammed his hands on the table.

“For fucks sake! Why would she…” 

He never finished his sentence. Once he saw her walking and stop right in front of his table he was speechless. No one ever makes Eddie Munson speechless. 

The boys turned to see why he shut up and were equally astonished, besides Gareth of course. He wore a smug smile, crossing his arms and leaning back into his chair. 

“Uh hi. Gareth said I could sit with you guys.”

Silence from the whole table. They just couldn't believe that Gareth was telling the truth. With no response, she tried again.

~Lena~

“Is that okay?” I asked as I looked at the boy directly across from me. He seemed like the leader of the pack so I awaited his response. But nothing. They all just stared at me like they had never seen a girl before. I don't know if I should be flattered or concerned. Before I could feel embarrassed and think this was a bad idea, Gareth spoke up.

“Here, you can sit next to me.” He scooted the chair next to him out for me to sit.

I sat down hesitantly, eyeing everyone as they still didn't speak. Lingering a little longer on the curly long-haired boy. He was cute no doubt. I toss that thought immediately away. Friends Lena. You're making friends. It was too soon to be having a crush on someone.

“Don't mind them. They didn't believe me when I said you were sitting with us.”

Gareth went around the table, introducing everyone to me. Next to him was Jeff. Across from me was Mike, and to his right was Dustin and Doug. Lastly, at the head of the table was Eddie. “Guys, this is Lena.”

I gave them all a smile and waved. Also noticed that they all wore the same shirt. I made a mental note to ask about it.

 Dustin seemed to be the first of the group to come to his senses. “So, where are you from?”

“Harrison. It's about a half hour outside of Cincinnati.”

“What made you come to Hawkins?” Mike asked with a confused face.

“Uh, well my dad overlooks construction jobs. The company he works for has a new location. So he decided to move closer since he’ll be running that place.”

Everyone seemed to become more comfortable as I answered their questions. Seemingly deciding that I wasn't a threat. As I talked I subconsciously worked on opening my peach. It was what I always did to them. Slightly crack open the top, and run my finger all the way around. Now and then lick my finger to stop the juice from running down my hand then twist until it splits in half.  Once opened I took a bite and noticed they all were staring again.

“What?” I said wiping the corner of my mouth.

“How in the hell did you just do that?” Jeff asked.

I couldn't help but giggle. “It’s my party trick.” I took another bite.

~3rd Person~

“Is that okay?”

The way she looked at Eddie stirred something inside of him. Genuinely asking for permission. His permission to sit with them. He was so dumbfounded to speak. Just taking her in. From her pretty brown eyes to the Queen t-shirt and jeans she wore that hugged her curves in all the right places to her ring-adorned hands holding peaches. She looked godsent. Well, at least that's what Eddie was thinking. He got a weird feeling as he saw you take the seat next to Gareth. Jealousy? What? No way he was already crushing on the new girl?! He barely even spoke a word to her, just listened to her answer any questions the guys had.

He watched her as she absentmindedly moved her fingers through the peach. His mind started creating naughty thoughts he couldn't shake away. The way she licked her fingers, completely oblivious to what she was doing to him. The juice of the peach slipped out the corner of her mouth as she took a bite. All he wanted to do was lick it off her. Oh, how he was already done for. 

Jeff was the first to express his bewilderedness. Man, hearing her giggle? Eddie wanted to bottle it up and keep it forever.

“It’s how I've always eaten peaches. They're my favorite,” she says like it is the most obvious answer in the world. Before anyone could ask about the side with the pit, she does the same trick to split it again in half and then pop the clean pit out. She holds out a slice offering it up to anyone. Before Eddie could act, Dustin took the offering.

“Well in that case should we be calling you Peaches then?” Gareth joked.

She pondered the thought and then shrugged with a smile. “I wouldn't mind that.” Right at that moment, Hellfire as a collective decided that from now on they would only call her Peaches.

Tagged: @luv4peterba1lard @arlxtarts @midnyghtsolstice

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.

If you would like to be tagged or share your thoughts please leave a comment. It would be greatly appreciated.

part 2 underway

[yandere-daydreams]

I thought of two other things for the walk of shame and if it were me I’ll probably never show my face again.

Arlecchino being your sugar mommy and having passionate night with her seems a good idea at first but when you and her does the deed in her office and got interrupted by her children coming back to report is literal mortifying. Walking out of there as freminet and lynette just silently judging you while lyney makes a joke about you being there there new step parent. Its the worst when your screwing a single parent and had to sneak out only to be caught by their kids.

Dottore is also quite awkward in the sense that he’ll probably screw you in his lab where all his experiments are kept. Like imagine all his experiments who are fearful for their lives hearing you and the doc “role playing”, I don’t know if they’re thankful for a few more moments of their lives or they want to kill themselves early so they cam stop hearing your moans about the doc’s “injection”. Another thing is how the clones work in this, do they take place screwing you 6 ways to sunday or are they judging you for screwing one but not the other. Bonus points if you have to do the walk of shame and accidentally stumble upon a clone torturing a subject only for both to pause as you limp yourself to the exit with marks litter through your body

fjkdsfjksdfjksl TO BE FAIR i genuinely think arlecchino would have enough curtesy to pencil in your six hour long boss/secretary roleplay sessions at least an hour apart from her debriefing with her children, but sometimes these things run long and sometimes, you have to limp out of her office with a few less buttons and a few more hickeys than you'd like while three orphans stare you down like you just crawled out of the abyss. in the best case scenario, they'll be too horrified to say anything, but in the worst, one will ask if you're one of their father's children too and you'll have to say anything but 'i call her daddy actually'. a bad time all around.

and with dottore,,, at least you can't say you didn't know what you were getting into. if you're enough of a freak to fuck him at all, you're probably enough of a freak to fuck him in his lab while subject #69420 waits to be flayed alive or something and not feel any shame about having to walk past the guards and lab assistants who just listened to you fuck their boss in a way that violates the geneva code. it's bad, but there's a good chance you're not the most well-oiled hinge yourself so. uh. do what you will with that ig.

[moonlightsmasquerade]

I'm gonna write mandela character roller skating headcanons, why? for fun!

Cesar is good at it, gets Mark out to do it but he has to hold onto Cesar at the start, once Mark gets started and gets his balance he's pretty decent at it. When Mark gets the hang of it more Cesar will go "Yay! RACE YOU!" and speed off with Mark going "NO FAIR!" and try to race after him. Cesar can't do tricks but that's not gonna stop them from trying! They'll try to do fancy figure 8s but will flail a bit.

I think Jonah can skate, he's pretty good but sometimes they'll try to be too ambitious and that causes him to fall (like skating backwards) Adam acts like he can before he goes out on the rink and turns out he's SO WOBBLY, arms flailing and he can't keep his balance. Jonah skates around him and laughs, slips and falls, and Adam starts to laugh and he slips and falls. They'll both have a laugh about it though, "You said you knew how to rollerskate! XD" "You can't judge me when you can't keep your balance for 10 seconds! XD"

Sarah seems cool and chill about rollerskating until you realize she's got a death grip on the rail and hasn't moved from the edge. Evelins good at skating, she can even do some tricks. She'll skate by Sarah being like "Hey you're doing really good, wanna move from the edge?" And Sarah will say "No Absolutely not :)" The only way Evelin could get her to agree to let go is if Sarah will hold (deathgrip) her arm.

Ruth isn't great, she can keep her balance OK but she does stay close to the edge if she wobbles, same with Thatcher but he will hold onto Ruth or Dave as a crutch because he's too scared of falling. Dave can skate circles around both, he's really good at it. Ruth trying to keep balance with Thatcher grabbing onto her arm muttering "dontletgodontletgodontletgo" and Dave breezes by like "this is so easy guys lol" and Ruth's like "EASY FOR YOU TO SAY!!!

[zydrateacademy]

Starfield Addendum: Ryujin and Stealth Design

I posted my review on Steam and here on Tumblr before completing the Ryujin questline. There's things to like about it but the penultimate mission was an awful experience.

Disclaimer: There are spoilers. I don't get into specifics on the who's and what's and I don't name names so even reading this post you can still mostly experience the story on your own. I just kind of spoil the general expectations and layouts of certain missions.

Side thought: I've already been told that there's a 'cheesy' way to blitz through the questline. Ryujin doesn't want you to ever murder anyone but they actually don't ever really care if you're marked as 'caught'. So there's a strategy of literally sprinting through the missions, hitting the objectives, eating food and medpaks and just escaping the area. In theory you'll still get the bonus rewards.

Just in case someone wants to "um actually" parts of this post. I just don't feel that that's the intended style of gameplay here. So let me start with the stealth.

Playing the game normally, still doing my first run clocking at about 24 hours. Some main quest, some side stuff, some spacefaring, some contraband. All of it trying to stealth through most encounters.

Just kind of experiencing the game as a first timer. At first stealth was a chore, nigh impossible beyond the first hit. I got an early lucky drop when an enemy bandit gave me a suppressed pistol (my review talks about how stupidly obtuse crafting is, ~24 hours and I still can't really kit all my own stuff out yet, just wearing what was dropped or rewarded) that luckily had a scope on it and stealth finally became a viable option even when I was only one or two perks into the stealth skill. So stealth is sadly not something you can just dive into, at least not in the same way as Skyrim.

I haven't tested stealth melee but judging from the low damage numbers I can't imagine it being very good. The stealth perk only gives bonuses to suppressed weapons, not melee attacks. So very quickly, melee could potentially fall behind. There's a blurb somewhere on TVtropes on Starfield that mentions that melee is almost completely useless as 98% of enemies will be shooting at you. I only see a melee enemy once in a while, meanwhile Starfield follows the same formulae of "dungeon bosses" that they did in Skyrim. The area's boss can be about 8-15 levels above you and they can hit incredibly hard with the scaling so it's a bad time to try and rush them while they're dumping bullets on full automatic.

So there's no sneaky stabby here, the game's main stealth conceit is making sure you're a suppressed sniper. And I haven't even acquired a proper sniper rifle yet but I have a silenced pistol and single shot rifle that do just fine.

Now, shooting a spacer in the head will still put your stealth meter in the orange and force enemies to patrol. I think over a decade of Skyrim (and even some in Fallout 4) have made the open world RPG gamer community a bit complacent, as everyone seems to miss the days where you could silently pick enemies off without their mates knowing. But if a spacer sees their heavily armored mate hit the deck with a crack in their helmet and blood on the ground, they will of course start doing some patrolling. They'll give up the search eventually.

However, enemy sight lines are both incredibly wide and far reaching to the point where there's a mod with 170,000 downloads trying to nerf them. I might have to get it.

So let's veer into the game's stealth faction, Ryujin Industries. Supposedly this game's version of the Thieves Guild, with Neon City serving as a cyberpunk version of Riften. Their introduction was neat, giving me a fair bit of Arasaka-but-worse, with their black/red motif and Japanese ownership. I liked their vibe, especially since I am effectively playing the same character I do on 2077.

I briefly had a few warning signs before being given one very good mission, then it went downhill.

First, Ryujin has a fairly strict no-murder policy. Now I have no idea if they actually kick you out or not because I tried to play by their rules for the experience but I do know you get chastised if you do actually kill anyone. This actually proves to be a huge detriment as you can't eliminate patrollers without angering your employers. I think they took Skyrim's TG as a lesson about how you could murderhobo your way through that questline without much of an issue but they forgot to split the difference. Starfield could have benefitted from Oblivion's style where if you kill someone in the same interior as where your job is supposed to be, you get kicked out of the guild. In Skyrim, Fallout, and otherwise I think Beth doesn't want people to lose out on content so they try to make everything accessible. They should be appealing to logic. If you fucked up, reload a last save you filthy animal.

The first five or so missions are like a baby's introduction to basic espionage. Go hack someone's computer, go slip this item in someone's storage, go talk to a guard to get their keycard (though I think I could have actually just pickpocketed them for that one). There's no danger or any real threat as long as you're not playing a braindead murderhobo.

To contrast, Skyrim's thieves guild sets you loose pretty quickly. You have the two radiant questgivers, all give 7 or so different "types" of missions to pick from. (This comes as a post-questline reward for Ryujin). So you can pick up two (more with mods) of those and go to the island estate to sneak around a bandit-controlled base. Now it still encourages stealth because those mercenaries have absolutely ungodly amounts of hitpoints, like five times the amount their counterparts in the open world do. They only hit as hard as their level demands (and wielding iron weapons) but if you're a fledgling thief they can be a real bastard to deal with in open combat.

That's what Ryujin should have done. Beef up the security, let us kill them if we have to but you can still figure out how to punish us for entering open combat beyond some chastising in dialog. As it stands I save-scummed through some missions (the penultimate mission, which we'll get to, I think I near broke my F9 key) but ultimately got through a majority of the questline with nary a bad word to my name. I think on any NG+ I might go get a bit head-shotty and see if I get kicked out completely. If I do, then that means Beth weren't fucking cowards and my previous commentary is null and void.

So after baby mode I am given a mission where I'm like oh hell yeah, the actual questline is starting. It's the mission called "Background Checks". Without spoiling any specifics about it, you're actually infiltrating your own employer's base (everyone but a security team is given some fake story about maintenance) to hack into an employee's computer to find some potential espionage. All well and good. The layout should already be partially familiar to you, the vent system is unlocked for your benefit... After that you're just ducking and weaving through some hallways in order to get to the computer. There was a moment where I had to savescum through a couple of encounters because the stealth... just isn't quite there.

So the perk system isn't as robust as Skyrim's was. There's literally only one stealth perk that eventually, all it does is make you 100% harder to detect while also giving the final benefit of opening doors not alerting enemies. Helpful, right. I also made sure to unequip my space suit which you are still technically wearing even if you clicked the option to "hide in settlements", but you're still wearing it and benefit from the stats. Well that's more weight, and it makes you "louder". And let me tell you, it only helps slightly. So with the perks, the weight knowledge, and even eventually an outfit that adds another 25% more detection reduction, I keep running into situations where I peak into a hallway or slightly out a doorway and my alert meter goes from "Hidden" to 90% into the orange "caution" notation in a single second. A half second more and it's red and put in "danger", where enemies will open fire and sound alarms. I still can't grasp why this is, except that they're still working on outdated Fallout 4 coding where some similar problems persist even then.

Beth caught some flack because Starfield is still running on a decade old engine. That wouldn't have bothered me because some of these problems didn't exist with Skyrim. I've had my stealth fuckups on Skyrim but they still didn't cascade in an entire base or cavern assaulting me. Usually just the immediate area. That went away in Fallout 4 with ballistic coding, where a single missed bullet, suppressed or not, will send legions of enemies to investigate you.

So after the quite excellent "Background Checks" mission you're given two other missions and they're... fine, but basic. You can infiltate some criminal base with a couple different options but the option I took I was literally able to just walk in, not make a fuss, talk to the person, then leave. So it was more of a persuasion minigame than a stealth mission. Same with the mission after that. With one or two persuasions you can literally just talk to two guys and pick up a briefcase that doesn't even have the stolen tag on it. Despite you stealing it, it's still something of a scripted event where a guy won't leave his desk. (Maybe he does and I didn't give him enough time). Either way, both missions are thematically fine for the story its telling. I just didn't sneak through them.

And now we approach the problem with Ryujin. We're forced to not defend ourselves properly, at least not in a preventative capacity. There is a damage type where you can nuke robots faster and stun human enemies but that's already a post-fuckup option. During this questline we still can't just snipe guards from afar to make the pathing easier. I did everything Starfield wanted me to do within my power and abilities. Rank 4 in the stealth perk. That one piece of clothing. Took off my space suit. I used detection based chems. Yet even still if you're in the vaguest periphery of the enemy, your hidden meter hits the orange instantly. This is the problem I had with the penultimate mission, "Sabotage".

This is essentially the finale. In theory this should be the "test" of all the things you've learned before, in a normal game. It's not. You're given one skill of "Manipulation" which allows you to temporarily mind control people. You can make them run off, open doors, use objects, etc. Typically in the fashion of getting them out of your way. Half the time it doesn't work and just puts me in their sightlines which was a huge problem in this mission.

It's tutorialized once, where it took me several attempts to even get the guy to move before finally getting it done. I barely learned how the mechanic actually functions, and then I'm shoved off to do this multilayered, multi-objective espionage assault on a rival company. There's elevators, you activate some gas leak to get all the civilians to leave, it's like a whole fucking thing.

It's fucking awful.

Maybe my second attempt will be better. Maybe I should have picked some more pockets. But the mission didn't give me room to learn and breathe.

I wasn't clear on the order of operations. You're able to get into one floor freely, and I tried breaking into other places that way but there were too many guards everywhere. I later then realize; I probably should have just done the gas-evacuation. Several alerts and reloads later I just full on reload an actual save, not just a quicksave, back at the beginning of the tower and I go hit the gas leak. So now most people are gone and the tower is replaced with specific patrolling-type enemies.

They were fucking awful.

I don't know if it was coding, behavior, or all stealth concepts just glitched out on me fully. All the problems I listed before came to me on this mission full force, a wrecking ball to my patience. Between quickloads, enemies would sometimes stop patrolling and just stare down the hallway I needed to go. At one point, dozens of quickloads and attempts, I was once stuck in this room with some guy who just wouldn't stop looking at the doorway I was in. I'd peak out the door and get hit with full caution or danger/alarms instantly.

I only fixed this by letting it go full orange which put him in a semi-alert status and only then would he actually move a bit. He and his buddy came to the door, gave up, and I could sneak behind them as they were walking away. Ten minutes of this shit and it wasn't even where I needed to be at all.

Also during that, my objective kind of glitched on me. The only marker was on the elevator which didn't work. I don't know if it's because the building was on lockdown or what. Where I ACTUALLY needed to be was back in the Marketting area (the place you can get legit access to) and find some vents and shafts and make your way deeper into the level.

And let me tell you, the actual level design... was fine. You can sneak on the vents and actually hop on the lights at catwalks and sneak above people. The same option was a thing back in the superior mission "Background Checks". So in theory we'd be familiar with the lessons. The design of the place itself was fine, but everything else was dogshit.

I was fucking around this mission for something to the tune of an hour and a half. I eventually gave the fuck up completely and someone on a discord server told me about the "tdetect" cheat which turns off enemies ability to see you. And EVEN THEN it still took me 10-15 minutes or so to find my way back down to the place where I was to steal a prototype. I literally couldn't figure out where to go even without worrying about enemies. Not because the level design was broke, but because the game itself kind of broke on me. Stealth wasn't working. The elevator didn't work. My objective marker didn't work. Players can whine about objective markers if they want but I did play Morrowind and was able to read the journal because NPC's gave you exact directions. There was no direction here, was the problem. Just "go do these five things," which is why losing the objective marker was such a problem at one point.

That last mission pissed me off that I just wrote 2550 words (that's about a chapter in a fucking novel) to rant about it.

Crazy thing is, the storyline wrapped up really well. The final-final mission is this unique thing where you go lobby a bunch of board members, and you can choose the level of ethics to employ on two different issues at once. It was really cool with a lot of dialog options and that characterization from the leadership I so craved from before.

To contrast, in Skyrim's Thieves Guild, you work with the leadership often. They give you those radiant quests, you're sent to speak with them to get tips on the mission. In the first mission, talking to one of them will give you some characterization about infiltration; and she points out an extra entry point that avoids guards. Ryujin needed more of that here. They really should have brought the lessons they learned with the Dark Brotherhood as well. In Oblivion and Skyrim's DB questlines, you're encouraged to speak with every guildmate and they'll often offer some kind of insight to the mission. Sometimes it's just a quip, but other times they'll actually give you an idea of positioning or something.

All of that soul is lost here. They hit the vibe. The story is actually really neat and fairly underplayed compared to a lot of other things. Nothing particularly world-shattering (except the issue of the whole mind control device, which you can address at the end), just a bit of Corpo on Corpo violence. There was a lot to like and it just came up a bit short for me.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[aviiatrix]

Meta topic: Core beliefs / @poeticphoenix send me a topic to write a meta about my muse on. meme status: accepting ! !

i would say river's core beliefs are constantly changing in a sense depending on the verse, but sticking to her main universe she is still kinda young. she lost her father, but I'd say her mother was fairly good about keeping river's moral values on the right path even in her own depression and grief. losing them both skewed that to an extent. she is, at her very core, still a baseline morally good person though.

she believes in doing the right thing no matter what the cost is. if someone is in need and cannot fend for themself she's quick to be their sword and shield and even someone capable sometimes she steps in just to ensure they'll be okay because the wasteland is a very unforgiving landscape and one injury (if they're not careful and have the proper med supplies for healing) can be fatal.

she's the type that even though she didn't ask for it she leads an entire army that believes in rebuilding and making sanctuaries for people because otherwise they would be left to their own devices against people as terrible as raiders. as much as river has been civil to some raiders for the sake of finding her sister regardless of what they have done she won't hesitate to kill them when it comes to them hurting innocent people.

she believes that people who are good deserve good, but isn't the forgiving type to those you could deem truly evil at their own core. i'd argue this is why she's actually nice to some raiders too. for example @poisonpicked's jax. someone who on the surface seems like the bad guy, but river knowing who he is at heart knows that isn't the case. she doesn't judge people on what is on the surface. she judges them on what they would do in certain situations and who they truly are.

that isn't to say she's completely good herself. she has tortured someone for information on her sister and still killed them after saying she wouldn't if they told her what she wanted to know. even though they weren't a good person, that still isn't really something a sane person would deem fair.

tldr; the best way to explain river's core beliefs is the quote i heavily associate with her which is 'only the merciful deserve mercy'. she still carries the values of protecting people and being kind, but at the same time she can be an awfully ruthless and cold person herself. it all comes down to 'you only deserve kindness, mercy, and basic human decency if you're a good person'.

this also does go for all of her verses, especially her resident evil verse. though she's tamer on the violence in the others.

[a-little-ray-of-fantasy]

Stolas or Wilt

I'll do both, both is good!

Stolas

First impression: I honestly didn't know what to make of his design, at first: I remember I found it pretty weird, especially his mouth. Aside from that, I didn't think much of him. ^^'

Impression now: MY SWEET TALL FLAWED FLUFFY BABY YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED!! ç_ç

Favorite moment: Aw come on, I'd have to make a list for this! Oh well, if I have to choose, I'd say when he sings a lullaby to Octavia in the second episode. Not only it's amazingly sung, but it's a first hint of Stolas' real character and inner turmoil. **

Idea for a story: One thing for sure: aside from his daughter and not yet lover, Stolas doesn't seem to have anyone else in his life. Does he have any friend? Judging from his current state of being and title, it seems Stolas finds it really hard to truly connect with others. It would be nice to see him being confident enough to try and bond with more people other than the only two in his life (no, his wife really doesn't count). It's what he deserves!

Unpopular opinion: I'll say this one and for all: comparing him to Valentino is a true disservice to the owl. Maybe at first it was fair, we didn't have a lot of info about Stolas besides his desires towards Blitzo, but now? It's clear as day that Stolas truly wants to be with the imp, but a posh, sheltered life coupled with his own sad love life has left him with little to no idea on how to approach Blitzo properly. No, he's NOT abusive. No, he's not malicious in wanting Blitzo as a partner. The reason their relationship is unhealthy is a combination of a huge social gap between the two and their own emotional turmoils. It CAN get better, but only when the two of them will be able to truly open up to each other. Stolas has MANY flaws, and cheating wasn't a good choice, but you have to admit that his family situation is awful, loveless, he feels trapped. His choice to cheat was impulsive and not thought out, but he never intended to hurt anyone. Sorry this got long, but Stolas as a character is often misread as irredeemable, and that just doesn't sit well with me. He's flawed, but he's very much loving and worthy of love just as much as Blitzo.

Favorite relationship: Two of them: I love Stolas' relationship with Blitzo and seeing how their bond evolves through its trials and tribulations. Despite how messy it is, I know they'll be able to heal together. I also love his relationship with Octavia: their family is crumbling apart, there's so many issues that Stolas has to face, but his love for his daughter is true and sincere. And while she's understandably cross at him for everything that has happened, it's clear she deeply loves him in return.

Favorite headcanon: I personally see him as in the spectrum: Stolas struggles in social situations, has got a whole deal of actions that act as stims (just look at how much he fidgets whenever he's on the phone with Blitzo!), not to mention his unique love for gardening and astronomy! He's definitely neurodivergent in my eyes!

Wilt

First impression: Always found him nice, but didn't think much of it.

Impression now: Oh sweetie, you deserve so much better than this. Also, oh no, he's just like me... o_o

Favorite moment: His moments in "Good Wilt Hunting" are a whole compilation of how awesome his character is. I especially love how he stopped everytime to help people on his way to the match. He had a choice to keep on going, and yet he stopped everytime to help, never expecting something in return, despite how grateful everyone was for his kindness. Wilt may not think so, but he truly is a great friend.

Idea for a story: Honestly I'm a bit at loss here. A lot of ideas have been explored with him. Maybe an episode where he and Jordan spend a day together and reconnect, while also seeing how much both have changed during the 30 years being apart.

Unpopular opinion: Not sure if it's unpopular, but, yeah, sleeping under a bed is not ideal. Wilt, ask for a bed all of your own! Man, he deserved that room...

Favorite relationship: He's like a big brother to Mac, and that's precious! Considering Mac's home life and Terrence, it's so good that Frankie and Wilt act so sibling-like towards him!

Favorite headcanon: I think this is pretty canon considering his history, but still... Wilt's compulsive need to help others and apologetic tendencies are not just out of genuine politeness: poor guy has low self love ever since his accident and separation from Jordan, and maybe that's why he can't bring himself to deny doing favors to others and stand up for himself. He's a people pleaser, and constantly wants to prove he's a good friend, even if his guilt doesn't allow him to really believe it.

[oncexinxmyxdreams]

☄️& 👪

Comet: What do people assume about my OC(s)? 

Mercedes: most would assume that she's an extrovert with how friendly she can be, but she isn't. She savors her time alone. While she is friendly, she prefers being with one friend. (That being Bruno.)  

Alejandra: Most assume that she's very naive. (Add that frustration to how she looks younger than her actual age.)  Alejandra isn't as naive as people think. She's had her share of loss, flaws, and strengths like anyone. She just doesn't like talking about them because they still hurt. People in her hometown think she's naive due to how she defends her "heartless" sister. "Oh poor Alejandra having that terrible sister! She just can't see how bad she is." Not true. Both twins know each other like a book. She's called her sister out and isn't afraid to go head-to-head when needed. She's also never had to question the love Francisca has for her.     

Francisca: Most assume she's heartless and they'll say it to her face. They don't think she cares for anyone. They'll even go as far as to believe that she enjoys seeing people suffer. To be fair, Francisca wouldn't be the easiest person to engage with due to her bluntness and arrogance. Still, never judge a book by its cover. Yes, Francisca's not a people person and she's not emotional. However, that doesn't mean she's cruel. She's always loyal to her sister and has protected her when needed. She does miss their mom, but she handles her grief differently. Being a doctor's assistant, she is affected by death and illness. She just doesn't dwell on it for too long. She believes you can't be stuck in the what-ifs. If so, you'd never progress. She's as hard as nails, but true as steel.   

Family: What is their family like/relationship to them/siblings? 

Mercedes: She has a blended family. Her dad, Vicente, passed away when she was a toddler and she only had her mom, Maria. When Mercedes was a teen, she gained a stepdad and later a half sister. Let's just say it's been complicated. She and her mom don't get along best. Mercedes disliked her stepdad, Armando, but he was kind to her. Eventually, she grew to like him. She has a half-sister, Desederia, and nicknamed her Desie. She grew to love her. After she married, she had a fall out with Maria. Since then, she lost contact with her family.  

Alejandra: She's always been close to her mom and twin sister. She used to get along well with her dad but had a fallout when he remarried. She'd like to reconnect with him, but throughout the story-spoilers-she's wondering if she shouldn't after all.

Francisca: She's never felt close to the rest of her family. Her dad wasn't that involved in her childhood. (He kept complaining that she seemed odd. She didn't play like/with other kids, learned to read quickly and always seemed like a smart aleck.) She's indifferent to him as an adult. She's always loved her mom and would often help her. She can be short with Alejandra but loves her dearly. She's protected her and wants to see her content after their hardships.

[mgsapphire]

A dystopia where sorority is weaponized...?

Ethology (Study of Animal Behavior)

Something that seemed interesting to me since the beginning of the series is how Kang Yo Han perceived himself as an outsider. It is not that he is rich and enjoys chaos, but that he has always been excluded from society due to his upbringing, in which he was isolated. He learned about human interactions from books and that one maid. He's not part of humanity but an outsider that is fascinated by how predictable their behavior can be.

As part of his upbringing and the trauma he holds, he's also very aware of the darkest parts of humans, and I bet if he were to be asked if humans are inheretly good or bad, he would respond that they're merely animals of instinct with a hyper developed sense of self. As in, humans, for him, will only look after themselves and no one else.

Adding to this, in the latest episode, when Kim Ga On tries to attack him because he thinks he was involved in the incident surrounding Yoon Soo Hyun, he reacts aggresively, showing an act of dominance, but when you analyze the scene closely, you realize it was a self preservation act. A trauma response, if you will. He hates being touched due to the abuse he endured.

What is family?

Something that I loved about this particular scene, and why I screenshoted it despite the awkwardness it has in it, is not that they're having a tender moment between the three, or that there's a table full of food, or even the fact that Kang Yo Han is acting childish but the reason why he's acting childish.

He views Ms. Ji as a mother figure, and she caught him red handed doing something he has never done for her. Kang Yo Han definitely has felt sorry for her multiple times, but I bet this was bad because he doesn't know how to react.

It is not that Yo Han grew up without a family, but that his family was weird, and at the center of it was Ms. Ji, who he has come to disappoint due to piled up misunderstandings. Kang Yo Han does love her, but he doesn't know how to face her disappointment, and the pain he has caused her.

For Kang Yo Han, family is something you protect and care for silently, because he was never at the forefront of it. Also, in this shot, other things we can see, is how he feels about the rest of his "family" based on how he paces the room and the distance he has from them.

Another scene that is worth noting under this title is the one in which we can see how deep the misunderstandings and miscommunications between Yo Han and Elijah run. It is not that there isn't love between them, but that when we face grief, we also wish to put blame on someone. Elijah puts blame on Yo Han to deal with her grief, and Yo Han just takes it without explaining his actions.

It is fair that Elijah feels that way, because in trying to protect her, Yo Han, instead, seems to communicate he wants to control her and that he doesn't trust her.

It is not until they face their own pain, that they'll be able to understand each other.

What kind of coin are we tossing now?

You remember how I said Kang Yo Han and Kim Ga On are two sides of the same coin? A duality of sorts? I think the same can be said about Kang Yo Han and Jeong Seon A. But this isn't a coin that's set by Yo Han. If anything, he's trying to run from the world Jeong Seon A has built and where she wants to position him.

They're both manipulative beings but for completely different purposes and completely different roots. If anything, we can see them as a form of convergent evolution - when completely different species develop similar traits- they became the way they were due to completely different reasons. They may look similar on the outside, but their core values and motives are so far parallel lines, they will not touch.

On one hand, Ms. Jeong is like that due to the inferiority complex she had when young, and her disdain for the rich, her manipulative tactics were a way to climb up and gain. On the other hand, Judge Kang became that way as a mean to escape abuse and to protect himself from further harm. You see? In a way, they both became the way they did due to survival, and have therefore, developed the same skills, despite how different they are.

Judge Kang is a shark and Ms. Jeong is a dolphin.

How Ms. Jeong uses her position as a woman to her advantage.

Am I obsessed with the perceived villain of the story? Yes. We ought to talk about how Ms. Jeong has played her game so far. She's never the one in power in front of others, she's but a messenger, and a messenger can never be shot. It's common courtesy.

Furthermore, Ms. Jeong, aware that others perceive women as weak, takes this to her advantage. That's why she's able to do it all in the shadows. Only two people have seen through her, and that's because she likes Judge Kang too much, and because Minister Cha became a small fish entangled in the fight between two particularly smart species.

Once again, I have to compliment how this is masterfully conveyed through the cinematography of the show. In the first shot (that I put in the bottom for some reason), she's but a wallflower, not meant to be seen or heard, letting Minister Cha be perceived as the one of power in the room.

When alone, she positions herself in the same place Minister Cha was just on, and spreads herself. Her body language, and the way the scene is shot is enough to convey how truly powerful she is.

Knowing that women are perceived as weak, she uses other women to get her means, because they will pass under the radar in front of arrogant men who think themselves the center of attention. The cards she plays always involve a woman:

Enhacing Minister Cha's motherhood to incite public empathy.

Manipulating the wives and not the husbands.

Planting a seed in Judge Oh to change the system.

Having her assistant be a woman.

Presenting herself as a compassionate secretary.

This kind of attention to character building and complexity is to be commended, but I can't help but realize this is also a script written by a man. Why must sorority be weaponized for a story to move forward? Still, it is quite the fresh take.

Manipulating the public's opinion is easier than one may think at first

A big part of the message tried to convey by The Devil Judge is how dangerous media representation and authority bias can be. It is no secret.

It does it in both subtle and forefront ways. On the former, it does it by showing parts where Minister Cha is rallying for sympathy from the viewers, where hypocrisy is shown, or well, where people seem to have woken up from the daze they were in. Meaning, they begin to question the actions perceived as immoral, absolving themselves from it. Another example is the president portraying himself as normal.

In less subtle ways, but way more gutural is the way kids were playing about flogging and how, because Judge Kang viewed it as just, his fanatics started mimicking and distorting the behavior in a vigilante manner.

This reminds me a lot of the Milgram Experiment once again, where because there's no authority putting a limit, those underneath continue to push despite their awareness of possible harm and immorality of their actions.

Here, terms as authority bias, Argument from authority, belief perseverance are important. A similar experiment is that of The Third Wave movement, where a teacher explained by demonstration how easy it is to manipulate the masses to have a certain set of beliefs, despite their own morality.

[iamanartichoke]

This isn't aimed specifically at you, more a general question, but do you think some people have a hard time distinguishing between bad writing vs rather it just wasn't what they personally wanted/to their taste? There were things I wanted in the series that weren't included, but overall I think it was a well made series. Whereas I sometimes think people's disappointment makes them think it must be a universal experience.

Any anon: *sends an ask*

Me: *one eternity later* so here's about 5000 words on this general topic that may or may not answer the question you asked in the first place.

That said, this is a really good question and I've been thinking about it for a few days, bc I don't think that there's actually an answer. I mean, on the one hand, it's not for me to say whether someone else's judge of good writing is objective enough, but at the same time, the fact is that it is extremely hard to not let subjectivity cloud your opinion on good vs bad writing. And to be completely fair, I think that people criticizing the show get more flack for it but it absolutely goes the other way as well - that is, people who enjoyed the show seem to believe that the writing is good because it is to their taste and/or they did get what they wanted. I mean, for example, back when the show first started airing and the whole "Loki is ooc" wank started really gaining ground, some people's reasoning behind their "no he's definitely ic" was "well I write him this way, so I see nothing wrong with this portrayal." Which is like a 10/10 on the subjective reasoning scale, so yknow.

(Incidentally, I do think that inconsistency in Loki's characterization can be proven objectively, just by looking at previous canon and identifying the differences in the portrayals, but I mean, there are still people who will look at that kind of evidence and tell you you're cherry-picking to support your argument or you interpreted the first one wrong or whatever so, like, it's moot at this point. Some people don't want to somehow invalidate themselves or their fan-ness by liking the "wrong" Loki, so they'll twist themselves into pretzels to insist he's been the same all this time, when the reality is that there isn't a right or a wrong Loki but there are two versions within the story, and ymmv on which one you prefer, and there shouldn't be anything wrong with that. But I digress.)

Another example is the handling of Loki's storylines - for as many people who dislike the series bc it didn't include or address any of Loki's trauma, for example, there are just as many people who like it because it didn't address the trauma. They don't want to watch a depressing storyline about Thanos and Loki's suffering. They don't want to sit through objectively "darker" content. They wanted to see Loki redeemed and to find worth in himself and to find people who loved him, and they feel that they got it. Other people who wanted to see those same exact things feel that they absolutely did not get it. The former group thinks the writing was great; the latter group think it's shit. It literally is just all subjective.

I think that the subjectivity of it is what causes there to be so many fucking problems when it comes to wank and ~the discourse~ and people aligning themselves with one side or another. Both sides want to be right and neither of them are, and that's because everyone's, like, "litmus test" of what made the series good or bad writing is coming from not only what they perceive is good writing (or not) but also their own biases, their own experiences, and their own perspectives of how the world works. (Not to mention their own sense of morality and how it should be portrayed in fiction, which is how you end up with purity culture and censorship fuckery, but that's another topic tbh.)

For example, on the issue of trauma, there was some really obnoxious wank posted awhile back wherein some people on the positive-side started saying that the people who didn't like the Loki series just haven't dealt with their own trauma and/or were not in a place of recovery, which caused them to view the series through a biased lens of wanting Loki to remain as traumatized and/or mentally ill as they personally were. And the people who came up with this argument made it a point to be like, "I have trauma/mental illness too and I had no issue with how the topic was treated, but I am in a better place than I have been in the past, and I can therefore appreciate Loki being in a better place, too." Understandably, people were offended by this bc, yknow, who is anyone to determine or judge how anyone else is engaging with fiction or why they feel the way they do and also the audacity, but for another thing, the people making this argument are being just as biased as they're accusing the antis of being, they're just framing it as a good thing. "I can see clearly now the rain is gone" and everything. And it just - it doesn't work that way. It's obnoxious to try and psychoanalyze people based on their responses to fiction, yes, but also you can't use someone else's (perceived or not) bias against the Thing as proof that it's actually good. That doesn't prove anything except that their biases are different than yours. (Relatedly, I also disagree with people who argue that if one doesn't see Loki's handling of trauma as a bad thing that they don't know anything about trauma bc, again, a lot of people who have trauma of their own had no issues and being on the positive side doesn't make their personal traumas or struggles invalid. Again, I digress.)

And lest this sound like I'm attacking the positive-side, I'm really not, bc it truly does work both ways - that is, I've seen (much more recently, which has made me feel some kinda way) some pretty blatant toxicity from the antis, too, including believing that those who liked the series or ship Sylki or Lokius or whatever are, like, abuse apologists or transphobic or just plain too dumb to understand why the writing isn't good, and that's not fair or right, either. But they feel just as justified in their view as the positives feel in theirs, yet neither side can come up with any reason for why they are correct that doesn't somehow tie into "this is good because I like it" or "this is bad because I don't like it."

Not to blow smoke up my own ass, but though I'm often self-deprecating about my comptency as a writer, I think that I do actually have some idea of what I'm talking about when it comes to this type of thing. I have an MFA from a really good school that focuses on the arts, and I learned from very accomplished writers, and I like to think that this gives me a smidgen of credibility when it comes to my own perception of what good writing is and isn't. Please don't mistake this as me saying that I alone am valid in literary critique irt the Loki series; quite the opposite - I'm saying that I know, objectively, what makes writing good because I spent a lot of time and money learning it, and yet my view of the series is just as subjective as everyone else's. I admit that sometimes I get really baffled at some of the positive arguments I see bc the person will be like, omg this was such good writing! and I'll be like, are you serious right now how do you not see everything that's wrong with it? but to be completely fair, I also get really baffled at some of the anti takes where the person will be like, this was so awful bc of xyz and I'll be like, I don't know wtf you're talking about did you hurt yourself with that reach or.

Anyway, my point is that as a fan and a consumer of fiction/media in general, my opinion is subjective along with everyone else's and I'm not above calling something shitty bc it's not what I wanted, and as a person who went to school for this sort of thing, all I can say is that the only way to get some measure of objectivity in determining whether or not a story (or writing in general) is good is to consider it based on what are generally considered the essential elements of fiction: characters, setting, plot, conflict, and theme.

The first question is, obviously, does the Thing have each of these elements? Loki does. The second question is, was the Thing successful in how it handled each of these elements? Were the characters thoroughly developed and did they serve their purpose in the narrative? Is the plot structured so that there's a beginning, middle, and end? Were the themes recognizable?

I think that you can objectively answer these questions in a yes/no sense - the characters showed some development and served a purpose in the story, there was a narrative arc of beginning, middle, and end (a cliffhanger end does still count as an ending, in that each character came to the end of their particular journey in this story with the cliffhanger leaving them on the precipice of a new story), the themes were established, etc. But as soon as you go further in-depth with your answers - well, there was some character development but this felt rushed or that wasn't believable or this thing was completely overlooked; or - this character showed really great growth between point A here and point B there and the theme of XYZ was handled really well, this or that was foreshadowed or paid off nicely, etc.

And neither side is wrong, but that also means neither side is right, and ideally this is what can spawn some really great literary discussions, if one is in an environment that is not tumblr dot com. The most beautiful thing about fiction is that it can mean whatever you want it to mean, and you can interpret it however you want to, and whether you're "right" or not, if your interpretation makes the Thing more meaningful to you and gives you something to think about and evokes an emotional and intellectual response, then you do you, boo. Yknow?

... So the very long, rambly answer to your question, nonny, is that yes, I do think that the lack of ability to distinguish "bad writing" from "I didn't like this" is a thing, but it goes both ways and one can never be truly, 100% objective in their media consumption and honestly, if we could all just get the fuck over our egos and the need to be right, we'd probably all be having a much better time in fandom. Which, to your second point about people thinking their experience is universal, I do think that that happens and I wish it didn't - I don't want anyone to speak for me and my experience of the show, for example, and neither does anyone else, so I don't know why so many people insist on doing it.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

The Perfect Bad Boy (Pt. 13 of 18)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 3 K

Summary: Working as a lifeguard in the Hawkins Community Pool, you try to fit in after moving from New York. Things were going pretty well when you notice you've been under someone's stare. Billy Hargrove, Hawkins' bad boy, has been staring at you since day one. You never intended to have anything to do with him, judging by the reputation he has. But Billy won't leave you alone, determined to show you his feelings are different this time...

As if your heart flooding you with confusing feelings wasn't enough, there are weird, strange animals lurking in the woods... But those have to be just part of the wild live of the woods surrounding Hawkins... Right?

<- Previous part (12)

Next part (14) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

Demodogs

The funfair is everything you thought it would be, and even more. The colorful lights, the music, the games, the kids running around. It's inebriating, beautiful, mesmerizing... You only wish you could forget what you saw on the road... What you saw a while ago and what James told you he saw. Four beasts so far, if you assume those were all different animals. It probably means there are more, right? Nobody was attacked yet, or else you'd know. News travel fast through Hawkins. But even so, the cops need to know, and whatever it is, it has to be controlled. But what you really need is to know what that is. You think you'll feel better once you know the species, so you can do some research and have some peace of mind.

“(Y/N)? Are you there?” Monica shakes your shoulder lightly, dragging you out of your thoughts. “You look a little pale. Are you feeling alright?”

“Yup. I was just thinking.” You all give a few steps forward when the line for the ferris wheel move.

“I know who you were thinking about,” Christopher says, his arm around Monica's shoulders. “He's coming, by the way.” He tilts his head towards something behind you, and you immediately turn on your heels, and the familiar burning on your stomach hits.

You can't help but smile to see him, walking among the sea of people, eyes fixed on you. It's ok to look now, right? You're dating, you're living together. And Billy looks so... Gorgeous. Hot. Awesome. He's wearing his black leather jacket and a dark blue shirt underneath, which is unbuttoned.

“Hey, princess.” His smile makes your legs weak as he pulls you into a kiss.

“Hey, handsome,” you mutter when you pull away, a hand on the exposed part of his chest. “Haven't you ever heard of buttons, Hargrove?”

“Yeah, but I don't think they're necessary.” He winks and you bite your lip.

“I think I agree,” you whisper before finally turning back to your friends. And, of course, they're all staring with wide eyes. Monica is the only one who knows you're dating. “So, guys... Billy and I.” You mutter, blushing lightly and moving again. You're next in line.

“I knew it!” Jason exclaims, high-fiving Monica. “I knew it, from the beginning.”

“I didn't. I mean... Billy is... Or was...” Christopher struggles with the words, gesturing at Billy and you. “Well it doesn't matter, does it? Congratulations.”

“Careful, Chris. Remember what happened to David last time.” Monica warns him, a smirk on her face.

“Next.” The old man calls and you move.

“Couples first,” Monica says, pulling you and Billy ahead of the others. The car only fits two, so you and Billy go alone.

As you move up, you look down, taking in the amazing view the ferris wheel provides. Billy has an arm around your shoulders, and you lay your head on his shoulder.

“You're quiet. What happened? You sounded very excited about the fair.” Billy asks, placing a kiss on your hair.

You don't want to tell him why you're restless, not today. “I was. I am.” You stutter a little, clearing your throat.

“Are you afraid of heights?”

“No.” You breathe out, cursing yourself for worrying him. “I'm happy, I truly am and this is... This is beautiful and being here with you just makes everything better.” Looking up, you pull him into a kiss, taking in his amazing scent, from the cologne you love so much. “I'm alright, trust me,” you reassure him when we break the kiss.

“(Y/N), you were very, very loud earlier. You literally threw water on me. You can't possibly think I wouldn't notice you acting weird.” Billy keeps his index finger on your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes.

You really wish he could let it go because you don't want to ruin the night, but don't want to lie either. “I just saw something in the woods, but I'm sure it's nothing.” You try hard to keep the fear away from your voice, to keep it casual.

“Was it the same thing you saw the other time?” He asks, the expression on his face changing. It seems that you don't need to ask Billy to believe on what you saw. He does. You have no idea why or how, but it looks like he does. “The same thing James said he saw?”

“Yeah... Two of them. Running, keeping up with the car.” Your voice cracks by the end, as the image comes back to your mind. It's almost surreal that you're so scared of what's probably just some kind of animal. “It's stupid. I'm a big city girl, I'm not used to living this close to the woods.”

“It's not stupid.” He assures you, pecking your lips. “We'll check it out tomorrow, ok?”

“We should tell the police. What if it starts attacking people in the daylight?”

“It won't,” Billy states, not a single hint of doubt in his voice.

“What do you mean it won't? Do you know what it is? Is it nocturnal?” The words come out fast. If he knows what it is, why didn't he tell you on the first time? Billy looks away, taking a deep breath. “Billy?”

“I'll need you to trust me in this, (Y/N).” His voice is different, urgent, deep. Of course you trust him, how could you not?

“I do,” you say in a low voice. “You know I do. Is something going on that I don't know about?” As you speak, your time is over and you're back on the ground. Billy takes your hand and start walking away from the ferris wheel.

“I promise I'll tell you everything. But not here, and not today.” You both stop, and Billy cups your face. “For now, let's us just... Enjoy the moment. How does that sound?”

Taking a deep breath, you nod. It was the plan from the beginning, so you might as well stick to it. “Alright.”

“Come, I'll introduce you to my friends.”

Billy guides you through the fair, holding your hand. His friends are on the Northside, where parking is exclusive for the employees. But you don't think they care. You only know Tommy and Carol, the other two guys and the girl you only know from afar. When they recognize Billy, Tommy raises his hand and waves.

“You'll hate them.” Billy warns.

“Let me be the judge of that,” you whisper as you approach the guys.

“What's up, Billy,” Tommy says, smiling. “...And who's that?”

Of cours they're staring at you. Why would you even hope otherwise? You're not only the new girl, but now you're also the one who actually got Billy Hargrove. People won't just look. They'll stare. “This is (Y/N), my girlfriend,” Billy says and you wave at them. “(Y/N), these are Tommy, Carol, Ryan, Buck, and Emily.”

“Hi. It's nice to meet you, guys.” You simply say, involuntary moving closer to Billy when you notice Ryan's eyes lingering on you.

“Girlfriend? Are you kidding me?” Carol asks, giggling. “I knew you two were hanging out but dating? I must admit I didn't see that coming.”

“Why didn't you introduce her to us earlier, Billy?” Ryan mutters, taking a sip from his can. “Is she too... Pure to hang out with us?”

“Actually, yes,”

“And have you started corrupting her already?" Ryan flashes a smile, and it makes you feel uncomfortable. You can see when his eyes move through your body, up and down, his smile only widening. “Why don't you give me your number, sweetie? I can call when Billy boy here is done with you.”

“Don't you–”

“Do you happen to have Billy's number?” You ask, raising your voice and placing a hand on Billy's chest to stop him from moving. Ryan raises an eyebrow and nods, a big interrogation on his face. “Good. Then you already have my number.”

He bursts into a laugh, furrowing his eyebrows. “Nice one. You could just say no, though.”

“It's not a joke.” Smiling, you feel Billy's arms encircling your waist.

“Wait. Are you two living together or something?” Emily gestures at you and then at Billy, and you feel when he nods. “Shit, it's true then. You're pregnant.” She stands up straight, wide eyes.

“I knew it.” Tommy states.

“That again.” Rolling your eyes, you shake your head lightly. “I'm not pregnant. We're just–”

“Living together,” Billy states, his voice making it clear there will be no further explanation.

Everyone, basically at the same time, gasps, giggles, and Ryan spits out his drink. “Holy shit, Billy. Can't believe you're keeping this one. But this whole innocent act she has going on is very alluring, I must admit.”

“Want me to beat him up a little?” Billy whispers in your ear, and you can hear the anger building up. And you didn't like what Ryan said anyway.

“I did say I wouldn't stop you on the next time so be my guest,” you whisper back, shrugging your shoulders. Who are you to intervene if Billy wants to use his friend as a punching bag?

You give a step back when Billy moves, straight towards Ryan who has the decency of raising both his hands in defeat. “C'mon, Billy. You wouldn't hurt me because of one of your cows, would you? She's just–” Ryan is cut short by a hard punch on his stomach, which makes him bend over and forces the air out of his lungs.

“I would just–” Billy pulls him up again by the collar of his shirt, his fist then connecting to his jaw. “–warn you but–” A kick this time, on the ribs. “–you just can't keep your damn mouth shut, can you?” Billy pushes him violently, and Ryan stumbles down, blood all over his nose and mouth. “I believe my point is made.” He turns to look at the others and you do the same, just now noticing your eyes were fixed on the fight. If you can even call this a fight.

“No screwing with your girl,” Tommy states, exchanging a wide-eyed glance with Carol. “Got it.”

“Let's go, (Y/N).” Billy fixes his jacket and takes your hand. “Want some cotton candy?”

He is acting as if he didn't just leave a bleeding Ryan lying on the ground. “Yeah,” you mumble, raising an eyebrow at his smirk. Billy starts walking, not bothering to wave goodbye at his friends. “Just because I didn't like them it doesn't mean you can't hang out with them. I want to make this very clear.” You have to say it. In a relationship, a person shouldn't try to control who the other hangs out with.

“You're an angel, you know that? The other girls had me for one night and already wanted to control what I–” He stops talking suddenly, shaking his head slightly.

“What? You can say it, I made peace with whatever you did before.” As you speak, you start pulling him on a different direction. This parking lot is outside of the fair, so you're near the back of the attractions. A place gets your attention. It's a bit dark, but there's this blue and purple light, enough to illuminate it just a little bit.

“I know, but I shouldn't compare you to–. Where are you going?”

Not bothering to answer, you just start pulling him harder. “There.”

“I might like where this is going.”

“Jerk,” you mumble, smiling to find that whatever attraction this is, the back is shaped like an L, which gives you a perfect corner to hide. So you move to the very back of it. “Thank you again,” you say, turning around and walking backwards until your back hits the metal wall.

“For what?”

“For defending my honor. It's the second time and now I can thank you better than I did on the first time.” Of course, he already has that smirk on his face. The one you used to hate, that you used to be scared of because it made you feel... Weird. “I–”

The words get caught in your throat when Billy picks you up suddenly, both his hands grabbing your legs and placing them around his waist. You immediately wrap your arms around his neck to steady yourself, giggling. “For the height issue.”

“The height is not an issue,” you tell him, the blue and purple lights illuminating his face enough for you to take in his features. They're already memorized, burned in your brain, but you still like to look. “It's good to be on the same level though.”

“Mhm.” He mumbles and you close your eyes when you feel his lips brushing on yours.

You're used to the burning sensation, the sweet butterflies on your stomach as the anticipation kicks in.

On the moment his lips connect with yours, the amazing, breathtaking sensation is clouded by a groan. A... Growl. Billy pulls away immediately, letting you down. “What was that?” you ask, suddenly aware of the woods across the parking lot.

“Stay here, I–” Another snarl, low and guttural, and then you see it.

The thing comes from behind a large truck, some feet away. You're frozen at the sight. Now you can see it, clearly. And it's not an animal.

It has no fur, just blue, wet skin... And no face. You were right. James was right...

“(Y/N),” Billy calls, but you don't move. “(Y/N), c'mon.”

The thing moves slowly, and you have no idea how, but it knows you're here. It's looking straight at you and Billy, despite having no eyes. You're trying to make your body move, to send any signals to your legs, but it's useless.

Its face starts moving, all of it. You feel Billy grabbing your hand, a distant, numb feeling. Then, the animal's head opens up, and an unnatural growl emerges from its throat at the same moment you're pulled. You don't know how but your legs start working, and you're suddenly running, as fast as you can, back inside the fair. But you feel hunted, pursued. You're among the people again, but Billy keeps running, you don't know where. You can't think. Maybe you're going crazy, but you're pretty sure Billy saw it too. He wouldn't be running if he didn't, right?

“(Y/N),” Billy cups your face, and only then you notice you stopped. The sea of people move around you, but you can't really see it. “Listen. I need you to help me find Maxine. Or any of her friends. Ok?”

You simply nod, taking a deep breath and trying to get yourself back together. “Maxine,” you repeat, clenching your fists. “Or the boys. Alright. But n-no separating to look.” You burst out the last part, holding the collar of his jacket.

“No, we'll stay together. I just need you to–”

“Billy!” A low yell almost lost among the noises reaches you. You both turn your heads at the same time to find Max running, pushing people out of her way. She's with the boys, and someone older. “We gotta go. Now.” She says once she's close.

“We–”

“The Demodogs are back.” Dustin cuts Billy off, his voice getting all funny again. But you don't laugh this time. You're too scared to laugh.

“(Y/N)? Are you ok?” Max asks, and you don't know what to say.

You're feeling sick. There are too many people here, and that thing is out there... What if it starts attacking? There are kids here, toddlers... You feel your body failing, and a strong arm encircles your waist.

“My place. Everyone. Now.” Billy commands as you struggle to stand up, hiding your face on his chest.

Is there any possibility you're having a nightmare?

Because these... These things don't just happen. It doesn't exist, not in real life. It belongs only to sci-fi or horror movies.

Billy has a hand on your knee as you ride shotgun in his car, not listening to whatever Max, Lucas, and Dustin are talking about on the backseat. You're waiting to wake up, you think. Trying to shake the image of that thing's head opening up like it's been sliced apart. You feel how your hands are shaking when you touch your face, trying hard no cry out of desperation.

“Hey,” Billy says in a low voice. “Remember when I told you to trust me?”

Nodding, you dry off the stubborn tears before looking at him. “We'll fix this. I promise you.”

“How? How do we–”

“We'll tell you everything,” Lucas says, cutting in. “I mean, she saw it. She has to know, right?”

“Right. But your brain may explode, so be prepared.” Max touches your shoulder, but you can't understand why they seem so... Calm about this. They're worried, but not deadly, ultimately scared. How in the hell is that possible that you're the only one here on the verge of losing your damn mind?

“Let's get inside,” Billy says when we stop by his place. “And wait for the others.”

You can barely feel your body as you walk to the house. Billy remains by your side on the couch as the boys stay in the kitchen. The low chattering is unlistenable.

“How are you feeling, princess?”

“I don't know how to answer that. I just say a very weird dog cracking its head open.” Running a hand through your hair, you close your eyes shut. “It's about that lab, isn't it? This whole thing smells like some screwed up experiment that went wrong.”

“The truth is actually a lot worse than that.” As he speaks, the door opens and you jump back to your feet, breathing out relieved when you see it's just the rest of the guys. And three more people, about your age.

Everyone gathers around in the living room and you go back to your place beside Billy. It's creepy the way they all keep staring at you, exchanging glances.

“(Y/N), these are Steve, Nancy, and Jonathan. They're part of our party when it comes to... This.” Max starts, and the three of them nod and give you a little wave. “There are also Robin, Hopper, the chief of police and Joy, Will's mom, but they won't get here in time so... Let's just do this.”

Maxine takes the deepest breath, but when you think she'll start speaking, she doesn't.

“I swear to God I'll lose my freaking mind if one of you don't start explaining to me what the hell is going on here because I just saw some–some sick, zombie, dead dog with no face and the head just opened up like one of those carnivorous plants and I'm sure something is very, very wrong and–”

“Alright, I'll do it.” Eleven speaks up, stepping forward and gesturing for Billy to stand up. She takes his place, looking down at her hands before looking at you. “Ready for the strangest story you'll ever hear?”

×

@chloe-skywalker @dpaccione @dreamin-of-dacre @funeral-7 @uncookspaget @youhavemyfantasticbeasts @halloweenbitch2764 @redlovett @multific @shinydixon @nikkixostan @clockworkballerina

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

can i say a sort of pointless rambly thing i was thinking about that i can't put under the cut bc i'm on mobile?

jk, i'm not actually asking. ramble below, not edited for clarity. the following is completely unclear and i will not fix it:

i've been thinking about how part of the reason i'm so chill about caryl is bc growing up as a queer woc 99% of my main ships were like, never gonna fucking happen bc they literally couldn't. it was like, "omg, they gazed at each other from across the room, let's analyze the homosexual subtext of this one scene for the next fifty years, that's not necessarily hyperbole." i've watched all my ships fuck other ppl/have other love interests, and i knew that my thing was never gonna be canon, so to see like, one thing being like, "one half of my ship fucked another person several years ago while pining for the other half of my ship," i'm like...#nice, bc that can and likely will be used as a plot point to get them together later on, whereas in other situations i've been in i just kinda had to deal with it. so my impulse when i see ppl losing their shit is to be like

and to be slightly annoyed, tbh, bc the ship is still on track to be canon, and it's like, literally two white heterosexuals, they're prime candidates for juicy angsty pining that actually gets a resolution.

but!

that being said, i recognize that that attitude isn't necessarily fair. for one thing, i'm not the only queer woc (or some variation thereof) in this fandom, and some ppl's impulse might be exasperation instead, bc like, "wtf, even my mayohet ship has dumb fucking drama," and that's valid as hell, and i get it.

and also, i get that, even if you didn't grow up shipping impossible ships (or mulder/scully, bc that's a brand of bullshit all its own), this has been a suuuuper drawn out process where sometimes it feels like they're legit sprinkling crumbs to keep you hooked, just to play you again, and when you are invested in something, like /rly/ invested, especially if it's a form of escapism or hyperfixation or whatever, that can be e x h a u s t i n g. and i get that. i truly do, and while i make a lot of snide comments about the fandom being bonkers, i do get where the bulk of you are coming from (unless you're one of those ppl who hate on actors and esp actresses for just doing their jobs, and attack them on social media, in which case i am very much judging you and you need to get your life together).

i also realize that in the scheme of things i'm still a newbie. i've been here, what, twoish/threeish years, whereas some of you have been here since the beginning, so i'm not as worn out as y'all. but i also think that gives me a bit of objectivity that some of y'all have (understandably) lost.

my positivity is not meant as a sleight against those of you who are feeling negative, but is more of a semi-objective viewpoint (i say semi, bc lbr, i'm invested af in this, so i definitely have bias), and to me the threads of the storyline they're crafting seem sort of obvious.

like, let's look at it, yeah? they have one season left of this show that has been on for over a decade. they need to cater to everyone to give them a satisfying ending, while still hanging on to carylers bc of the spin-off. darylrreah seems like a very calculated move, bc it gives them both something to make abcers happy, while also creating tension and suspense and pining for carylers (i think they might underestimate just how fed up some carylers are tbh, and are banking on us to hang on for one last ride, which, honestly? if they play it right will probably work.)

if they end up doing a dumb love triangle thing, which, without seeing the episode and gauging the subtext i can't confidently say if i think they will or won't, it will ultimately end in our favor. it has to, bc leah isn't going to third wheel them on the bike in the spin-off. we can say with good authority that whatever that relationship ends up being (again, idk if they'll drag it out or not) it will be temporary. which leaves caryl open to ride off into the sunset and then bone down in every state in the united states and in puerto rico for good measure.

it's a lot of cheap drama, but i really and truly do not think it's anything to worry about, and i still really and truly trust kang to not make it out of character. ik ppl still don't agree with me on that point, and i'm not gonna argue, but to me it really does make perfect sense.

and i also predict that they are gonna play it up hardcore in the promotional shit and talking dead, but when that happens, remember it's bc it gets attention. regardless of where the story is ultimately going, relationship drama gets attention, which gets viewers, which gets amc and twd producers nice and comfy with full pockets

idk. to sum up ig i just wanted to clarify that i don't mean any harm with my relentless positivity. my history in fandom has just made this seem like nothing in comparison, bc while ppl are freaking out, i'm like, "oh damn, they're actually gonna get together by the end of this, aren't they? i didn't know that could happen!" and that makes me excited instead of upset

and you definitely don't have to listen to me. maybe i'm actually wrong. maybe i'm completely full of bullshit and am just good at making things sound confident. i got a lot of As on papers in college over books i never read, i know how to bs. but i also know how to analyze, and i while i will be the first to tell you i am not the best at a great many things, i do know that i am good at critically analyzing text while taking into account the context it was written in, and imho all signs point to canon caryl. when, i'm not entirely sure, but i see it happening. if it doesn't then they severely fucked up their storytelling, and that'd just be bad writing on their part.

(if you want proof that i'm good at reading writers'/producers' intentions, consider that i watched like, 8 seasons of supernatural before giving up, and said to myself, "i think they're gonna make destiel canon, but not until the very last second bc they are rly into catering to their fans but also have to consider their dumb fanboy audience so they can't do anything crazy overtly gay," and guess who hit the nail on the fucking head on that one)

none of this is important, but it was rattling around my mind grapes and i wanted to write it down into something vaguely coherent, and where else better to do it than here. i can word vomit and then send it into the ether and pretend i never said a thing. i love this horrible website, nothing can compare

i have no real conclusion to this, it was mostly stream of consciousness, but i hope it sort of helps y'all understand where i'm coming from, and why i am as chill as i am about things. not about y'all. y'all cause me so much anxiety i get physically sick and have to legit block tags, but with the actual show content i'm zen as hell

uh

the end ig?

it feels weird even signing off on this, but w/e

-diz

[deathwishdaydream]

Dear Universe, Up Yours!

Chapter 16

"So uh..." I began, facing Gerard. "Yeah, I don't think Jodie will be able to fix this."

"Yep," he replied, turning his head towards me.

"Sorry about your car," I added, lightly biting my cheek.

"It's okay," Gerard said. "Solved the plate problem anyway."

We walked on the side of the road as I carried the paper bag that contained the hair products, the suit from the cleaners as well, and a few other things while Gerard held the comics from the car in between his right arm and torso. He and I decided we'd walk until we find some town to stop at and abandon the car, but grab everything important from inside. Now, we had both gotten tired from walking, as we could see the sky turning into a shade of a deep royal blue, and the sun coming down, creating an orange and yellow hue across the horizon.

"So," I began, looking down at my shoes as they tread on the road. "What's your whole deal anyway? Your whole 'we're in this together' sort of thing. You're loyal but for what? I don't mean to judge, but I didn't remember you having any friends." I wasn't trying to sound rude or make fun of him for that. I didn't have any friends either.

I heard him give a breathy chuckle and felt his eyes on me as we walked. "I didn't, it's true," he answered and I looked up at him as the orange light had reflected on his bright blonde strands. "But... I don't know... It's the golden rule, I guess," he smiled, giggling shortly after.

"We're high school seniors, Gerard, not first graders,"

"I know, I know, it just seems relevant. I want someone to be... loyal to me," he said as he stopped in his tracks, making me stop walking and look at him. "I want somebody to stick with me... Even the worst mistakes I make or the stupid things I wouldn't mean to say... they'll just... Understand. And for that, they won't leave and abandon me."

I stared at him for a while in silence, trying to word what I was about to say correctly. "So... was that your motivation towards me? You acted all like that just so I'd reciprocate it?"

"No! Of course, not!" he exclaimed as his eyes had widened from my assumption.

"So you just explained... what you would do if you came across someone else?" I asked, trying to understand him.

"Sort of? But not really, at the same time."

I scoffed in response, chuckling quietly after. "Okay, but," I began, "You started saying those things, what, when I... y'know at the motel? Why?"

"I don't know!" he replied in clear frustration. "There are no real answers for any of the questions as to why I kept being that loyal or clingy. It's just... I don't know," he sighed, looking at anything but me, and I felt my eyes soften at this. "Okay, I won't do that to anyone else but you, if that makes sense. I worded out the whole golden rule shit incorrectly, it's the part where if I want someone to act like that around me, it's only fair if I do too. But y'know, in the best words, I could describe it... the feeling... it's just an instinct, y'know?" he said, pausing as I tilted my head to the side in curiosity.

Then, he continued, "I didn't really need to have friends before to... be determined to stick with you no matter what. It's just that... I like you, (Y/n). And I didn't want anything bad to happen to you so I thought it'd be best to stay with you. And after everything we've been through, all the chances where I possibly could have left, I didn't even think to take them. I just wanted to stay with you. After everything we've been through, I want to be there for you."

My lips had formed into a slight smile, unsure of how to feel. "Yeah, but... Why me? Out of anyone else?" I didn't want to pester him with all these questions. They're just really important to me. He could have screamed and ran away when I did what I did. He could have called the cops on me. But no. He didn't do any of that.

"You're..." he trailed off, looking down and then at me, not sure what to say next. "You're important to me now. I don't know why... but we'll figure that out together, right?" he said, chuckling weakly. "You saved me from danger. You have depth, you're not just some irritable seventeen-year-old who doesn't want to interact with people. Sorry, that was just my first impression of you. But anyway... Well... most importantly, you make me feel like I'm somebody. Someone important. Someone who means something, anything at all. Y'know... I was just some lonely nerdy nobody, back in school. Now I'm out here, with you, and I feel like I'm not some nobody who has... no role in this world."

I opened my mouth in an attempt to say something, but I couldn't think at all of what to say. Sometimes, sayings don't really need to have a response. They could just be silently appreciated, maybe with a small nod or a pleasant smile. However, I felt prompted to.

"I feel that way too. To be honest, I'd feel lost if I never reunited with you or had never met you... I, um... I really mean it, you know, so... it does mean something."

He gave a crooked smile, but I felt exposed. I never in my life wanted to show vulnerability, and of course, I failed that back when I panicked about the murder or stressed, to and about Gerard. I didn't exactly feel myself. Or maybe I'm just starting to actually find myself from being around him. There was always some weird feeling in my gut whenever I thought deeply about him or looked and observed him very closely. Something made him vastly different from anyone else. His looks, personality maybe, but god, there was something that had really separated him from the rest of society. But that's what I had truly admired.

"Let's get back to walking, it's getting dark," I suggested, averting my attention back to the sky that had gotten darker over the past minutes, the orange part of the sky fading down. Gerard nodded in response and we both continued to move forward, in search of somewhere to rest for the night.

Soon, we had found a 24/7 diner, surrounded by a couple of other buildings. The diner's long neon strip of red light around the roof had emitted brightness throughout the area, therefore, contrasting from the dark blue sky. The outside walls were wooden, looking like some sort of cabin you'd find in the winter. There was also a bright sign that had the words "Lucille's" in cursive neon light, which was most likely the name of the place, and in small, capitalized letters read "DINER" in the farther right the roof. Gerard and I had decided we'd eat there for dinner, then probably check in the motel to rest at.

We settled down onto a booth, him sitting across from me. The atmosphere was pretty silent, not including the quiet chattering of the minimal amount of people, as well as the noises from the kitchen, the clattering of plates and utensils. It wasn't very busy, for it was pretty late now, but there were enough employees to handle everyone in the room.

My elbows were pressed on the table as my head rested on my hands, looking out the window. The sky was dark, but the lights from the other buildings had made it seem not empty and creepy. I turned my head to look at the other people who dined here, all spread out from each other and mostly all old. Then, I looked away to see Gerard eyeing the menu. By then, we had already ordered our drinks.

His long blonde bangs were in the way of his face and I didn't know how to explain how much I wanted to move them out of the way to clearly see his face. I thought he was beautiful, I was confident about that. Almost every silent moment we had together, I'd use the time to admire him. Because he was just so damn stunning. But when the silence ends, I always ask myself why I felt that way. But I end up not really knowing.

I scratched my nose and averted my attention away from Gerard to the waiter that is placing our drinks down on the wooden table, the liquid in tall glasses. He and I then ordered our food and once the waiter left, complete silence again.

Fucking fuck it.

I stood up slowly from my seat and took only three steps to walk over to Gerard's seat. He looked up at me in uncertainty. Then, I sat down on the spot next to him, and so he scooted over so I could have more room.

"Y'know..." I began, not knowing entirely what to say, but sighed after. I looked at him and he was already facing me by then. I brought my hands to his face and started to move his hair from in front of it, turning my head slightly. God, he was truly gorgeous. His eyebrows were slightly upturned, eyes merely widening, and a rush of light pink came over his cheeks as if he was blushing. I didn't want to confuse him, randomly sitting next to him in order to admire his face properly, so I tried to think of something relevant to say. "So... do you want to dye your hair red?"

His pupils reduced pretty quickly as if he had gotten out of some trance once I spoke. "Oh, um, yeah," he answered, tucking behind his ear a loose strand of hair that had gone in front of his face once more.

Gerard made me feel things. A feeling I've never felt before and therefore cannot identify. And especially ever since he and I reunited from when we had first separated the feeling evolved to something I'm extremely unfamiliar with. Well, now I felt... obliged to make him feel the same way my mom feels whenever she's with Adeline; treat him the way Adeline treats my mom. But then, what does that say about me? My feelings? Gerard was absolutely beautiful and caring, and well he deserves to feel... known. Appreciated. Seen. Admired.

I looked at him and he smiled at me, which made me do so as well.

Something I found so astonishing is comfortable silence. It's not awkward or unnerving, it's wonderful. And when I could just look at Gerard without him feeling uncertain or disturbed, it's just so relieving. I really liked how Gerard looked, but also how he acts, of course. There was something very enthralling about how shy and timid he'd be around me, and how, occasionally, he'd get a rush of confidence and dedication. He could be so selfless and understanding. And honestly, what he had said before, I feel the same way; I feel that his presence made me feel like an actual somebody. Now, I just wanted to be with him every hour.

The food had gotten to our table a couple of minutes after and we had just eaten without any exchanging of dialogue. The only sounds that had filled the entire place were again, muttering, the sound of dishes clashing against each other, and faint footsteps of the waiters walking around. Even eating, I felt empty-I felt that I should have said more than I have when Gerard said all that. Or told him how beautiful he looks, instead of finding some relevant excuse to have gaze at his face. That's what I hate about time. You can't go back so you'd have a million regrets. But regret is something that you can, obviously, learn from.

Soon enough, we had both finished eating and I looked at Gerard for a while as he was distracted by the other people in the room who chattered amongst themselves. I lightly poked him on the shoulder-he didn't flinch but turned his attention away from what had distracted him and looked at me.

"Uh... Wanna dye your hair now?" I asked hesitantly.

We had checked into the motel that was just a few blocks down. I didn't really like the redundancy of everything, this same schedule every day. Except, Gerard would be unpredictable, which gets me to ignore the tiresome routine. Although, I felt stuck in this position. Running away used to be freedom, but ever since I killed that man, everything is just being cautious and hidden.

Gerard and I were in the bathroom as I started finishing up his red hair. There wasn't much speaking between us except for a few small stories Gerard would tell and I'd be amused by. When I was done, he placed his head under the faucet of the bathtub as I began to thoroughly wash his hair from the extra dye. Running my fingers and hands through his hair was a feeling of Then, turning the handle from above downwards to stop the water, I grabbed the small white towel to my left and draped it over Gerard's neck as he sat up, backed away from the tub. I stood up, motioning Gerard to do as well and once he did, I grabbed the towel from his neck and placed it over his hair, drying and massaging it as the towel started to get a light red color from the contact.

I stopped after I thought it was dried off enough and brought it back upon his neck as the ends were over his chest. His hair was still a bit damp, but it was very red. It was a vivid cherry color and I started to move the strands away from his face. The color didn't really fit him, his personality, but nonetheless, he looked so... pretty with it.

He turned his head to the mirror, observing his now red strands. "How do you like it?" I asked, seeing a smile rise upon his dusty pink lips.

"I love it," he answers contently, turning his head to see what the side of his hair looks like, running his fingers through it. "Thank you, (Y/n)," he said, looking right at me.

"It's no problem," I replied, giving a small smile as we left the bathroom.

Gerard turned off the main lights in the room and went to his bed, getting settled in. I could see that his hair made the pillows a little wet and pink. He moved to turn off the lamp on his side and he then looked at me, who just stood across the room awkwardly, holding my arms. "Goodnight, (Y/n)," he says, shuffling in his bed to turn the other way around. The way he would say my name... It made me feel existing.

"Night," I replied, which almost sounded like a whisper.

I slowly walked to my bed, but only just sat down. Then, I turned off the lamp, making the whole room pitch-black, except for the alarm clock in the room, illuminating a small green light as it read "11:34 PM." I laid down on my back, staring above what could have been the ceiling due to how dark everything was.

It's so repetitive. Going motel to motel, restaurant to diner. The only difference is that we now have to go on foot because our car is just gone. I wanted to do something more than just that. It was now forced, just going away, as far away as we can so that nobody would find us or find out that I killed somebody. I wanted to be somewhere else. I just want something more.

I moved in my bed, reaching for the lamp to turn it back on. Then, I looked at the other side of the room, Gerard's back was to me as he laid peacefully on the bed. He couldn't have been tired. He couldn't have been sleeping.

"Gerard?" I called lightly from my bed. There was no response.

I got off of my bed and walked to his, then tapped his shoulder lightly. "Gerard,"

He turned, opening his eyes as his eyelashes fluttered delicately. "Hmm?"

"Umm... Will you come with me?"

[henlex]

Onlyoneof Compatibility: Junrie

Suns

Rie: Scorpio I'll try to be unbiased I swear

Mysterious, driven, water sign so driven by emotions. Fixed sign so stubborn. They love power and can be very strategic about getting it (you might even realize because it can be really subtle) They love to investigate things, get to the bottom of things, basically find the truth or deeper meaning. Don't shy away fr confrontation, not easily intimidated. They can be pretty secretive, they don't easily open up but would love to hear you talk about yourself and learn everything about you.

Junji: Aries. Fire, very driven, energetic, can be a bit childish. They're straightforward and want everyone to be as well. Naturally athletic, or at least meant to move their bodies (main dancer yesss) They tend to live in the now, don't think things through too long because they want to get moving. They know what they want and go get it, they can be very brave because they don't let anything stand in their way. They enjoy a challenge.

Moons

Rie: virgo, earth. They like stability and enjoy taking care of the little things in life like running errands. But they can also nag a lot😂 But if you show them appreciation they'll happily help you too. They really like feeling needed and helping, they'll probably be the first to jump in if someone needs help. They really like living simple, unassuming lives. They can be easily overwhelmed and worry a lot. They thrive on routine. They can get restless and nervous but love to analyze and are detail oriented. They shy away from new people, can be stiff about affection, but show their affection through small gestures. Reliable, good for advice. They can be quite shy in love. Very interested in others problems and can be skeptical.

Junji: leo, fire again. Often not outgoing but like being the center of attention with those they're close to. They like to organize and be in control of their group. Very creative but can be bossy. Jshfjsnjf they need a lot of love and care to function😭😭 (is this why he's so cuddly) They can be very dramatic if hurt, with big displays. Very proud and don't like being controlled. Not easy to change their mind or their plans. Strong sense of fairness and justice. Apparently these are cuddly mfs

Mercury

Rie: scorpio am I reading myself I'll be unbiased I swear😂😂

So they really love finding answers, getting to the deep truths, constantly learning. But it goes to places other don't dare go or haven't even thought of. VERY observant. They hate anything and anyone superficial and tend to see right through it. They can be suspicious and pessimistic. Great communicators, but can be prone to lecturing, but are passionate about giving advice. They are best at judging when they aren't personally involved. The secretive scorpio nature likes to keep their own secrets hidden. It's Very hard to win an argument against them. But when they aren't emotionally involved they are very lucid. VERY protective of those they care about, and will defend them with anything they've got. Prone to jealousy, they tend to expect the worst from others. They love mysteries and challenges.

Junji: Aries, is this whole man fire!?!?!

Quick decisions, they don't like mulling things over because they don't have the patience and need instant gratification. Very direct communication...again. Rip this boy is Not subtle. Can be agressive-fire- especially when they are opposed. Childlike. They can be sensitive and defensive. Not detail oriented. Truthful and direct but innocent and enthusiastic. Idealistic/ optimistics. They love new things: opportunities, ideas, challenges. But they might drop old things for something more exciting. Motivating and fun with infectious enthusiasm.

Venus

Rie: Libra: air, a big change.

This boy is so soft oml. Will try to impress you with their kindess😭 They can be very gentle and exact which can come off as insincere. They always go for the middle ground and expect to be treated fairly. They will make concessions to make the relationship work. Any imbalance will make them unhappy and slowly wear them down. They could express this is underhanded ways.

Junji: Aqua, Air another big switch. Open minded, unique, and rebellious and want everyone to know, especially the object of their affections. They really like being recognized as being different. They like unconventional relationships which can mean a lot of things depending on their circumstances and culture. They don't like any restrictions, don't follow anyone's path. They really want to break the mold even in shocking ways, but they can also come off as cold or stand-offish. They want their lover to also be their friend. They also want someone to appreciate their mind and ideas. They need room to be themselves and they'll give you the same.

Mars

Rie: Virgo: earth, productive, goal oriented. They like to do a lot of things, can be stubborn or particular about the way they do things. Not one to anger but when pushed they can nag A Lot. Sensitive. They can be nervous and restless. They need to be busy or they really struggle. Shy and humble especially when they don't feel knowledgeable enough, but they are curious and will want to learn everything they can.

*Sex- healthy views of sex. Simple and sweet. Attracted to people who have gone unnoticed. Like a person's imperfections. Very attentive. Like to care of the other. Sub. Very curious.

Junji: Aries...wow junji just🔥🔥🔥🔥 Ok so lives in the present, can be quick to anger but it's quick to pass. Impulsive. They go in and out of crushes fast😂 "they feel alive when they have someone to desire" good lord. Spontaneous as always, quick decisions, hardly deliberates on anything. They don't like when life is predictable so they're always going and trying new things. Relationships with them are exciting but hard to keep. Very impulsive. Again they're very direct and hate when others are anything but that.

Sex: spontaneous. Like an innocent/ pure partner 💆🏼‍♀️ Agressive, love a conquest. It literally says they like their hair messed with EYE

Bonus: north nodes

Rie: libra rip it's me again. So he needs to learn cooperation and trusting others. He's comfortable in Aries, aka being independent and doing everything for himself. He can be selfish but he's meant to be in relationships. That will make him feel whole.

Junji: virgo. So he's basically supposed to get his head out of the clouds and not only follow his inner voice. He's comfortable in the dreamy pisces but he has to learn how to keep his feet on he ground and observe. Can be sensitive to the world.

*Messy thoughts and summary*

They both probably wake up early and enthusiastically take on the day, that's so cute.

They both love organizing and hate a change of plans 😂😂

They both love a good challenge

Rip Rie really likes to think things through while junji just goes. This could either drive them insane or they could balance either other. I think junji would understand ries thoughtful nature tho because of his leo moon  

So junji doesn't like being controlled and is care free and Rie isn't controlling but likes taking care of the day to day. It could be perfect. Junji can be free and rie can take care of things.

So Rie is very Very detailed and junji is not at all.... Which is complimentary if they don't try to change the other

Junji is that childlike optimist that Rie needs. Could really help him kind of unwind or just enjoy things/ have fun, be carefree. But also Rie could help ground junji.

They just seem like a perfect match....in bed

Rie's slower moving nature could drive junji insane but that's not a guarantee 😂

I'm emotional. Junji literally is meant to learn and become more like Rie. That's called fate.

Lads rie's soul is comfiest in junjis sun.... Hello. I wonder if he feels super comfy with him because he Understands him so deeply. But it's also a relationship and theyre learning all of these things from each other and they're genuinely Made to do that. I'm. Hahaha Soulmates wtf.

Rie overall is really just silently observes literally everything. He for sure knows everything about everyone and is just chilling, watching, learning.

[cina-full-moon-xanadium]

will they do maximum mighty and hyper muteki? both seem fun to build

those also seem very unlikely. what you gotta keep in mind about FRS is that their main thing is main riders, and at retail they only do about 5 releases a year -- anything beyond that is premium bandai, and is usually a repaint or at least something that re-uses a lot of parts (so Genm, Joker, Faiz Axel). The furthest they've gone in doing something that wasn't a main form or easily repainted from a main form has been the upcoming Kuuga forms and OOO's Tajador - at which point I should mention that both of those things are really popular; and so far they've only shown interest in making extra stuff that isn't a black repaint for the four seasons that always get a lot of merch (Kuuga, Den-O, W and OOO). It's also looking like once they finish their current Heisei Riders project they'll move onto doing main riders from Reiwa and Showa at retail, judging by their recent reveal of KR Black.

So I mean... when it comes to Ex-Aid. At best I could maybe see Brave being possible; I think there's a fair chance they'll start doing secondary riders. But I wouldn't get your hopes up for much extra stuff for anything that isn't Kuuga, Den-O, W or OOO