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orcelito · 1 year

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ok I don't think we as a fandom talk about the way Vash cries blood enough

we only see it once or twice from what I remember, the one definite time being here ^ when the puppet attack first begins & he's dealing with the emotional agony of seeing so many of his family turn into puppets.

so it's clearly something that comes out only when he's in severe emotional distress.

the interesting thing is that Wolfwood is fucking TERRIFIED of him bc of it.

whatever this moment is, Vash is giving off the same sort of oppressive energy that Wolfwood's experienced with Knives. it's the first time during their travels that he's really been forced to recognize What Vash Is. he knew it of course, saw him in Jeneora, but he's such a goofy guy it's easy to forget.

but whatever Vash is doing here, it makes Wolfwood Incredibly aware of what he is.

so the real question i think is What exactly is going on here? is it unintentional? is it simply a response to the emotional agony?

Vash isn't the type to indiscriminately terrify everyone in the vicinity on purpose. he wouldn't be doing this purposefully out of anger while Wolfwood's there. no, in this moment, he's not even angry at all. he's Distraught.

going from This

to this

in just a moment.

yeah. that's some fucking emotional agony. i dont think Vash is doing this entirely on purpose.

but THEN...

as both Leonof and Wolfwood stare at him in fear, Both feeling his oppressive energy, Vash then lets out some sort of blast that blows against everything between him and Leonof. it doesn't destroy anything, doesn't even injure him, but it's a physically tangible effect that scares the Shit out of Leonof & spurs him into motion.

there may be some anger involved in this moment, but it's not the hair-trigger rage you would expect from seeing his family turned into puppets. it's something Quiet, something almost cold. he's distraught, Resigned, & retaliating just because he has to.

Vash hates all of this. he doesn't want to fight him. he fucking Knows this guy too, knew him as a kid, & none of this makes sense. but he knows that he needs to fight him, & doesn't have any kind of choice.

but he's not happy about it. not in the slightest.

#speculation nation #fanny reads trigun #fanny's trigun analysis #trigun #trigun spoilers/#trimax spoilers/#adding that tag for tag goers. since this is a very trimax moment.#im just fascinated by the implications here. there's so much we don't see about Vash's abilities. him and Knives both.#there's the implication that he can read people's minds in the way he sometimes responds to thought boxes #and also the entire mental conversation he has with Legato. NONE of this is brought up.#the way Knives created that tree. they obviously can generate vegetation just like their sisters. or at least Knives can.#Vash creates that barrier. which I see as an extreme manipulation of gravity to prevent anything from going through.#and of course there's the explosions. with the angel arm theyre huge.#but then we see at least once Vash turn his finger into a lil canon. aka it can be done in a smaller form #and also the implications of him just making Bomb Bullets? mini versions of his giant explosions? What??????#so it brings the question of What If they could do these things on smaller scales? would Vash be capable of minor manipulations of gravity?#would Knives be able to just generate a fruit in his hand?#so many weird little things!!!! and we have no idea!!!!!!#but ykno what me as a fanfiction writer my entire PURPOSE is to extrapolate from canon. which includes their weird ass powers.#aka im going to make assumptions from the little bits we see in canon and im gonna RUN with them #definitely looking to do something with This moment too. Vash's oppressive energy... it will Definitely be fun.

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fisheito · 24 days

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yakuya in MY swamp? in MY ecosystem? no . i am still in disbelief. i hope you all know that my particles are bouncing off the everything. i am using periods as punctuation but the state of my mind is naught neareth final.

#the devs really did surprise me.....i'll credit them with that #i fully believed it was gonna be rei #i looked at that silhouette. saw the chunky heels. thought of kuya #but i scoffed at myself. tch. of course not. devs wont play with their strange topbottom segregation. i'll never get the yakuya event #at least not until it's with garu so they have a yokai hella exposition event #it's gonna be rei at a specific angle to SIMULATE a kuya. he will be wearing kuya-esque heels just to spite all the kuyafans #AND YET HERE WE ARE #UNDER THE SEA NO LESS #WHAT ARE THEY DOING INVADING MY SPACE LIKE THIS #like hell i'm gonna share my zone (abyssopelagic) with those accursed sirens #i'm going lower #i'm moving to the trenches. i'm gonna slowly lose the use of my eyeball sight . i'm gonna adapt to conditions #SO MANY conditions. maybe even learn to bioluminesce #actually no. then the predators might find me. and i'll have to regain the use of my eyes in order to improve my chances of escape #perchance even enlargen them like the giant squid. living in constant fear of a fox or a snake appearing in the depths #yet i get the creeping suspicion that kuya is just going to bully yakumo (when he's not bullying eiden)#kuya gonna drop a sad story about personal sacrifice and the difficult lives he's lived #and yakumo ever the baby in comparison will stare at him with his massive saucer eyes like.... do i... deserve to feel sadness?#if i have not gone through the trials and tragedies that master kuya has???#is kuya gonna be soft yokai grandpa or is he gonna be Auntie of Hard Reality #the boy just wants to find new soup ingredients #kuya will then unveil the ethical ramifications of harvesting these specific ingredients #and using them for a purpose other than their original spiritual intent by the indigenous merfolk #along with the questionable supply chain and processes that go into creating the ingredients in the first place #(not that any ethics or spirituality rituals or stuff like that is actually enough to influence kuya's behaviour in any way)#but it'll certainly mess with yakumo!!!! and that's where all the fun is?#furrows brow. what will they do with this event.....#i am so very excited to see them interact..!#mirage of scales #yakuya

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supermaks · 3 months

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Kit do you not rep Charles anymore 😭

Of course I do he’s prime I just need a break from his team and that fucking dog

#ask #binottos gone. his bones are gone. sainz on his way out. the evil has been DEFEATED #we did it. we found everything that was wrong wid Ferrari and put it in a box and sent it far far away where it cant hurt us anymore #finally a clean slate for elkann and a blank cheque for vasseur to rebuild il cavallino the way enzo wanted. pure italian excellence #and a semi italian boy to lead it all. vasseur FINALLY recognizes leclercs potential as n1 and turns him into the central piece of a new er #they get him hamilton. biggest media event in f1 history #a proven winner. an upgrade in every way. bigger than ferrari? that wont be a question he'll need to answer #binotto is bones. f1-75 is dust. next year sainz will be nothing but a bad memory and the rusting crux of all their PAST problems #this is vasseurs vision now. his holy plan. his sf-24. his personnel. wid elkanns blessings and his deep. deep pockets.#2 years later. the monster's gone. vasseur is here.#and what has vasseur done?#the garages remain the same. no big poaches from rivals. nothing to prepare for hamiltons arrival.#maranello follows a dev path that comes from the same wind tunnel as haas. haas' data correlates. their upgrades work. ferrari's dont.#last 2 upgrades failed because the very concept of the car was wrong. 2 months behind at least.#((took merc almost 2 and a half years to deal wid the damage of an incorrect baseline and correct course))#ferrari came into the triple header 2nd in the standings and left wid 50 points TOTAL. baby mclarens-first-wcc run behind by 7 #out of those 50 points none was sharls #sharl has scored 1 point in 4 fucking races #vasseur's ferrari has turned a generational qualifier into a kid whose idea of making pole is running experiments in q3 #because who cares anyway if the car is setup for races except it aint setup for that shit either #so quali has to work ((it doesnt)) sunday has to be flawless ((never is)) but to point fingers is a worse crime than this approach to gp's #last gp. silverstone. as representative as it gets. sharl fails to make q3 #bouncing around in a setup that hadnt been previously tested on either fp but wud surely make it worth their sunday #sunday: sharl gets lapped #ik sharl better than this #but idk what im looking at rn #I ignored the influencer milestone special helmet because I expected a performance that wud make me forget it #I need him to be a racing driver #he says 'he cant find the words anymore' bro I rlly need him to find them #I'll always ALWAYS root for sharl but to keep it 💯 idk what I'm rooting for anymore

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the-eclectic-wonderer · 1 month

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This is not prepared at all, so it's likely going to be messier than usual, but I was in the shower earlier thinking about the Golden Girls (as one does) and I drew a couple of conclusions on the topic of how many children does Blanche actually have? that I wanted to share with you all.

So, first of all, let me sum up the controversy. The issue lies with one of Blanche's statements in S3E3 Bringing Up Baby, when she's trying to convince Dorothy to keep the Mercedes she bought with the money they'll supposedly get after Baby's death:

"I want that car, Dorothy. I will give you anything. [...] I'll give you one of my sons. I have given this a lot of thought. I have had four kids, I have never had a Mercedes."

Ok, everything tracks so far. Blanche has had four kids, some of which are sons. We meet her two daughters, Janet and Rebecca, a few times during the series, so the natural conclusion is that Blanche has four kids, two sons and two daughters.

Which is great, except... her next line in S3E3 is this:

"What do you say? Which one do you want? Biff, Doug, Skippy? No, don't take Skippy, he's got asthma."

She names a Biff, a Doug, and a Skippy, so... three sons. Which, in addition to the two daughters we see in the show, makes for a grand total of five kids. Huh.

Alright, we know that Blanche wasn't the best mother ever, but I find it hard to believe that she forgot how many children she has, so: what's going on here? The obvious explanation is, as always, that this is a continuity error (although it's a really egregious one!), but you folks know I prefer to find a Watsonian explanation wherever I can, so let's see if we can figure out anything interesting.

One thing that struck me when I first realized this discrepancy is her use of the words 'I have had four kids'. Not I have, I have had. Why does she use the past tense here? The sentence flows better with it, but it doesn't make a lot of sense in-universe -- unless you think that she's using 'to have a child' to mean 'to bear a child'. If that's the case, then what she's saying translates to 'I have physically given birth to four kids, I have never had a Mercedes.'

I'm sure I don't have to point out the implications of this, do I? If the number of kids Blanche has given birth to is four, but her total number of kids is five, then that means that one of her kids is not hers in the strictly physical sense, i.e. one of Blanche's kids is adopted. This would solve the discrepancy without breaking the canon elsewhere (as far as I can tell, at least).

For a while, this idea remained in the back of my head to examine at a later date, because it still has a number of issues to work through. For one, why would Blanche (and supposedly George) adopt a child? They had kids of their own apparently without any issues -- why adopt another child, instead of, well... making another child, if they wanted one more? I guess it's possible that fertility issues might have arisen at some point, but that seems unlikely for a number of reasons; that kind of problem is generally genetic in nature, and it tends to be diagnosed upon first try, not after four successful pregnancies. So, then... why?

I was stuck on this point for a long while, until I suddenly remembered this conversation between Blanche and Virginia, her younger sister, during S5E11 Ebb Tide:

"I remember when you were 16 and didn't come home for Father's Day." "I was away at school!" "Oh, yes. The Good Samaritan Academy for the Knocked-Up. Two, four, six, eight, all us girls are three months late."

It seems Virginia got into a spot of trouble when she was 16, and was away 'at school' for a while to take care of it. While this might imply that she was sent away to have an abortion, there's also space to hypothesize that she was sent away to carry her pregnancy to term and actually have a baby to then give out to adoption. If this is the case... I wonder if this baby is the one that Blanche and George adopted?

While an adoption seems a bit out of character for young!Blanche (to me, at least: she wasn't interested in her kids, why would she agree to adopt another one?), I think there's some space to consider it. For one, George might have convinced her! We don't know enough about the man to draw clear conclusions, but he did send money to the one child he had out of matrimony (see S5E18 An Illegitimate Concern), so maybe he feels more responsible towards kids near him than Blanche did -- and, well, if he'd asked, Blanche would have agreed immediately, of course. I feel like Big Daddy might have also played a part in this scenario: he could have wanted to keep the child in the family (a Hollingsworth is still a Hollingsworth!), and asked the youngest married couple among his children to take on the responsibility, to shield Virginia from the shame.

Note that this theory has a few issues anyway. For one, while Virginia is Blanche's junior, according to Wikipedia she's only one year her junior, which would put Blanche at 17 when all this happened -- and we know she met and married George much later, when she was already a university student (see S6E9 Mrs George Devereaux). However, I can't find any confirmation for this difference in age in the show itself, so I feel like the hypothesis still deserves some consideration.

As for which of Blanche's children is adopted, well... we can for sure rule out the boys, since she mentions them all by name in S3E3. This leaves her two daughters, Janet and Rebecca. All throughout the series Blanche has a rocky and painful relationship with Janet, even more than she has with the rest of her children:

I would love to have a chance to raise David. I might make up for the mess I made with Janet. [S1E6 On Golden Girls]

Well, honey, I really do want to see you. I think we have a lot to talk about, Janet. I've been thinking a lot about you, lately. [S2E16 And Then There Was One]

"I just talked to my daughter, Janet, and she and my granddaughter, Sarah, are coming to visit in a couple of days. Oh, I've never been so happy!" "Janet? Isn't she the daughter who hates you?" "[...] She doesn't really hate me, Sophia. We just don't see eye to eye." [S7E23 Home Again, Rose: Part 1]

As for Rebecca, while we know they stopped talking for a few years due to a disagreement, she seems remarkably closer to her:

We were always so much alike, and so close, just like Siamese twins. [...] I have missed her. She's always been my favourite. [S3E14 Blanche's Little Girl]

Although Rebecca herself seems to have a different perception on their relationship:

You're not happy, Mama. You're doing it again, you're telling me how to live! [...] Nothing's ever enough for you. I had to be the prettiest, I had to be the most popular, I had to be the brightest... [S3E14 Blanche's Little Girl]

I think there's two possible theories here, neither of which paints Blanche in a good light (but hey, we love these characters because of their qualities as well as their faults, don't we?). If Janet is the child she adopted, I think it's possible she might have been especially neglectful towards her (especially in her first few years); she might have taken her frustration with being convinced to adopt her out on her, as a lack of affection when compared to her other kids. This would explain why the relationship between them is so fraught (certain wounds last a lifetime, I'm afraid).

If Rebecca is the child she adopted, on the other hand, she might have wanted to overcompensate for her abandonment and sort of one-up Virginia ('see, how well I can take care of your daughter? aren't I the better mom?'). She might have showered her with affection (and with expectations, judging from what Rebecca says!) to the detriment of her other kids, which would explain the issues in her relationship with Janet as well.

I don't know. It's obviously very clear that, for all her faults, Blanche adores her children and is deeply pained by her mistakes as a mother; she often expresses regret for her actions and wishes she'd been a better mother:

I realized, too late, that I'd put myself ahead of my children. I've never made up all the time I didn't spend with them. [...] deep down, I wish you were really mine. So I could try again with what I now know. [S2E16 And Then There Was One]

For all that might have happened in the past, it's evident that Blanche loves all her children equally and considers all of them her own, so she's clearly gotten over any issues she might have had -- but that doesn't excuse her past actions, of course.

There's a whole lot that could be said about Blanche's approach to motherhood, how it connects to the way her parents treated her as a child and to her own internal issues, but as for the question of how many children she has, I feel like this is a satisfying possible answer. It's not airtight by any means, and I'm sure there's other ways to explain the discrepancy (they might have adopted a child from George's side of the family, for one, which would change a lot of dynamics); this is just the one that occurred to me. As always, I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts, so do let me know your ideas about all this!

#god i love blanche so much. psychoanalyzing her is so much fun #i honestly don't know. this is not as canon-compatible as my deductions usually are but it's at least *interesting* enough to share #i'm sure there's probably better explanations than this though. i feel like an adoption has to be involved somewhere #i can't see any other way to explain the 4/5 discrepancy? i briefly thought one of her kids might have transitioned #but that doesn't work for a number of reasons #maybe i'm just not seeing something. do let me know if you have any thoughts about all this i'd love to read them!#even within this theory there's lots of other stuff to consider. for example: does the child in question know? do the other children?#i think the answer is *no* but who knows?#and also: do the girls know about it? and if so how did they react?#i mean -- dorothy also got into trouble when she was very young and rose is an orphan who was adopted into a family #they're bound to have interesting reactions to this sort of thing #but well. this is all from me for now #ta-ta to you all!#the golden girls #blanche devereaux

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puppyeared · 5 months

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Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..

#I’m reading volumes 14-16 of the ouran manga OOUGHHH MY HEART #I love this weird little friend group so much its unreal #like u have this charming sweeps you off your feet prince but he’s actually a huge lovable idiot with a kind heart and his friends #who are all misfits that he reached out to and drew in because of his kindness and own weirdness like that shits TIGHT BRO #and the trauma part where he has some deep seated issues with love bc he thinks that itll break a family apart like with his mom #how his family isnt allowed to be together because his mom and dad fell in love and how he says he wants to build a big house #so that way one day everyone will get along as a family like. all he wants is not to lose everyone and the only way to do that is #by maintaining a certain order.. he both wants a complete family so bad and doesnt want anything to sour between anyone #so he assigns each of his friends a family role based on how he sees them and YEAH its mostly played for giggles and tamakis #already weird so its his way of showing theyre close to him but. god damn this boy has LAYERS #it also feels kinda meta towards how found family tends to get thrown around to assign characters as 'siblings' or family roles instead of #using it to describe characters who are close enough to be each others family. cuz tamakis doing that EXACT THING in a way tht #ties in with his character and i have to say its fascinating using that within the story itself and its completely plausible #theres a lot of things i can say about ouran that are good bad and questionable but. god i love it when characters are niceys to each other #i remember i really liked the mall episode bc kyoya and haruhi got to spend time together and their relationship isnt very close #but it was really nice to see their personalities bounce off each other. i think i also wouldve liked to see haruhi alone with kaoru #i also firmly believe all of the hosts are at least a little in love with haruhi and this can be anything like endearing romantic cuz like #who DOESNT love haruhi. kyoya i think would want to study her under a microscope like his fascination with her draws him in #but im fucking obsessed with whatever haruhi and tamaki have going on because YES hes obsessed with her YES he jumps at the chance to #put her in a cute costume but haruhi? she just fucking goes with it because she knows hes fun to be around even if hes a little wacky abt i #theyre all so. NNGGHHHH #ouran #ohshc #yapping

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beneathashadytree · 4 months

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Gentle reminder that I write for a gender-neutral MC with zero physical descriptions! Only when pregnancy is involved do I write that they’re AFAB. Other than those cases, it’s as vague as possible to make sure that everyone in the fandom feels included!

[more ranting in the tags oops]

#maya talks #chinese otome games aren’t very inclusive #i mean lnds is considered progressive simply bc the mc has darker skintone options #which is questionable to say the least considering that the hair options don’t even match that lmao #actually scratch that otome games in general aren’t inclusive #the only thing that comes to mind with a gn mc is obey me and we’re legit a SHEEP there #but anyways #please be mindful while requesting that your request complies with my rules for requesting!#as someone who’s literally never had any representation in any piece of media i’m extra sensitive when it comes to that #i can tweak the mc’s personality a bit yeah #but aside from that i keep them (physically) a blank slate #picture yourself!!!! your oc!!! go wild!!!!#and have fun <3

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smile-files · 25 days

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i continue to find ii3 baffling. why did they make it (this isn't to hate on the season, i'm genuinely curious)

#melonposting #this isn't meant to be ii neg by the way. i'm just confused about AE's writing choices #i don't remember if they ever said explicitly? at the very least i haven't heard an official answer #i don't think it was initially for any plot reason. my theory is that it's for the same reason bfb and tpot split #the episodes were taking really long to make and they wanted to go back to regular lighthearted uploads. which is understandable #so while ii2 was cooking they could still post new ii episodes with reasonable frequency #but that also raises so many questions #the biggest: why the hell is mephone here #seriously i know people like mephone but i'm sure having a different host wouldn't turn literally everyone off #and mephone hosting this show causes so many strange easily avoidable problems #like the screwy timeline. mephone ditches his show for what he experiences to be years and yet ii2 is continuing like normal #only a day has passed for them. why? maybe they'll try to explain it #in any event if ii3 had a different host this wouldn't even be an issue #but then they made ii3 really plot heavy for mephone which then ended up screwing itself over #the season justified itself as being mephone trying to escape from his problems #and he goes through character development to address all of his baggage and how much of a jerk he can be #that suddenly makes what seems to have been meant to be a lighthearted offshoot season into an imperative piece of his character (bizarre)#which would inevitably make his return to ii2 really weird cuz that would mean he had his redemption arc basically off-screen #but then they didn't even do that????? in the new episode mephone is still his old bastard self. nothing like late ii3 mephone #which means that they're effectively retconning ii3's plot out of existence. as it is ii 15 barely acknowledged anything specific from ii3 #but this in particular is especially absurd. ii2 can continue like normal only because they're acting like ii3 never happened #which is just insane to me. why even give mephone character development in ii3 to begin with???????#why does ii3 even exist????????????????????? his character development is literally the in-universe justification for the season #i'm so confused #i'm just glad ii2 can proceed like normal :thumbsup: but these are seriously some puzzling writing decisions

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tokiwigiwi · 8 months

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so ive been a fan of danganronpa for a while now, i think i got into it late 2018, and basically since i got up to chapter 2 of thh togami became my favourite character and he's been my fave ever since, and much of my time was spent largely thinking about it on my own. and due to that i was stuck in my own head with very little fandom content to supply my mind. so because of this there was a time where i had went through all of togami's main ships and when i realised i had exhausted all the content for that ship i would move on. during all my time i ended up at one point or another shipping togami with all the survivors, a couple characters from the main game, and even an oc, but not once have i ever shipped him with toko. and i think thats hilarious. like even i, who was starving for content, didn;t touch it with a 10 foot pole

#may.txt #do NOT come after me okay most of this was when i was like 14 and 15 #i actually do remember shipping togiri very early on #after i had gotten bored with naegami and how it was basically togamis only big ship #so i at least had good taste with that #togakure is still a little bit funny #and togahina is funny specifically for me as i see them hooking up once because asahinas questioning her sexuality #and togami is the most girlish looking man she has access to #and togami is lonely because naegiri are dating and hes jealous #but they both immediately feel weird after #comedy gold #and also canon compliant #maybe one day i will release my very embarrasing and cringy art of togami x oc #but maybe it should never be seen by human eyes again

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iobartach · 2 months

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#muse #important #and here's a rendition of what i like to call;#“panels that make me go 'hmm' the longer that i look at them”#bc can you see what this implies? about what miguel has done in the course of developing alchema.x's c.orporate raider program #all to perfect the very gene altering technique that'll transform his body shortly after this #hmmmm #also aaron i see u lurkin'#the foreshadowing on this page was great #also given how long mig spent with alchema.x #i'm prettyyyy sure that he was involved in ... other... questionable research / projects #or at the very least dearest /dad/ (derogative) would've encouraged it #oooof #don't even get me started on mr. simms either #got some new thinkings about that as well

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lesbiansanemi · 8 months

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I hate when I’ll be complaining about some stupid bullshit a coworker does to other coworkers and half the time their response is to lower their voice and go “well…. You know…. I’m pretty sure they’re… on the spectrum, you know?” And every time I have a split second when I have to consider saying “you know I’m autistic, right?” just to make them vaguely uncomfortable for a few minutes and actually think about what they’re implying but of course I do not do that because the gratification is not worth a large sect of shitty coworkers knowing that about me and then talking about me like that every time I do something vaguely annoying or dumb but man…. It does get tempting sometimes

#like idk!!! sometimes the coworkers in question DO display some common autistic traits #but that is NEVER what is being complained about (at least not by me) so WHY are we bringing it up like that el oh el #like when I say ‘yeah I don’t like this coworker because of the shitty fucking things she did to my friend’#the response should not be ‘well I think she’s autistic isn’t that so funny she’s so obsessive about stuffed animals it’s annoying’#shut up shut up SHUT UP AND DIE #I don’t CARE that they talk too loud I don’t CARE that they’re bad a social cues I don’t CARE that they do ‘weird things’#and it’s so. HFDJSJKSKSKS AAAGGHHHHH #whether they’re autistic or not MAYBE that’s not what should be getting brought up during a conversation like that when it has NOTHING to do #with it #also maybe we shouldn’t be doing shit like whispering ‘on the spectrum’ like its some awful terrible thing #just thoughts idk #and the thing is too is that even if I told these ppl I was autistic #they would 100% be the types that are like ‘oh? but you don’t ACT autistic I don’t think you are’#like actually I got very good at masking for these reasons thnx #also you think autism = Sheldon from the Big Bang theory and nothing else #but I already learned my lesson cuz I told a coworker that I wasn’t sure about exactly twice #one of them went ‘oh THATS why you’re so dumb and don’t realize when other ppl don’t like you and take advantage of you’#and then the other one went on a mansplaining spiel about how me being autistic was why adhd meds didnt work on me??????#so yeah. never doing that again. haha. hahahaha. hahahaha……#this actually happened a few days ago but it’s been Bothering me so much #I hate my fucking job….#kaz rambles

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the-casbah-way · 3 months

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some people will look at my current wip and say that malcolm running his hands through jamie's hair as he sleeps and singing him old scottish songs is out of character but to that i say a) no it's not just hear me out and b) suck my fat cock you can't stop me from making those old men experience Real Human Emotions

#the question is what should he sing. it's tempting to say something cliched like wild mountain thyme #but i'm thinking something by the corries. they were my entire childhood and i like to imagine malcolm listens to them #listen usually i hate people making pairings like this too soft or nice #but this is immediately after they beat the fucking shit out of each other and have a screaming match. it just fits ok #it's clear that malcolm's work personality is entirely separate from the rest of him (initially at least)#i think he has a real soft / caretaker streak in him that he reserves exclusively for his niece/nephew + his mother + jamie #and on another tangent. i think malcolm listens to a lot of scottish music. very in touch with his roots and culture #jamie on the other hand has a more complicated relationship with it #he has that internal struggle of seeing Home as a place of pain and hardship and bad memories and trauma #home is somewhere you leave / escape. so traditional scottish stuff reminds him of that and it's weird #he also has the conflict of having been treated differently for his accent etc in the past so he tries to separate himself from it sometime #scotland to him is old school working class industry men with chronic emotional constipation #a lot harder to romanticise than the fucking rolling hills and the glens #(i'm projecting with fucking all of this. if i'm finally getting lanarkshire boy rep on tv i'm projecting onto it ok)#ttoi #the thick of it

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boxwinebaddie · 4 months

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hi uncle nina! sorry if this is kinda overbearing, but you havent posted anything today so i just wanna check in and make sure youre doing okay! <3

oh my god, sweetheart!!! this is not overbearing AT ALL! this is extremely thoughtful and makes me feel extremely validated. <3

i'm sorry for causing concern, but ty for being concerned about me.

because the school year is coming to a close, things around me at work have been pretty intense, so i've been tossed around like a ragdoll the past week and haven't had much time to write as a result. i also haven't been sleeping very well and rush a lot in the mornings, so i've forgotten to take my mood stabilizer the past couple of days which makes me v sluggish, zombie-ish and unpleasant in general. :/

...when i am like that, as a weird way of sparing you, i suppose, i try not to post on here too much because it feels quite shitty indeed for you to get a notification for my blog just to watch me bitch n moan.

however, i have taken my medication today and feel bad for fumbling kyle week...as we know i'm not really good at holding myself accountable or making deadlines. oddly enough, it's not that i don't want to answer my questions, it's just that other than not being able to really find the time recently, i just can't find the right...words?

( this ask is long and irrelevant, but read if you wish. ilysm. )

or, rather, i don't feel knowledgeable enough the subjects to answer? specifically in the areas of my tsot/tfbw styles and ncuniverses, i feel a little insecure because i don't know sp or the games as well as many other people do, so i'm trying to speed watch episodes/watch speed runs of the games online so i can at least keep some canon intact?

i also am finding that creating and understanding how high fantasy universes work is...difficult? lmao? also because i did crazy stuff with mutations and science and politics in my tfbw ncuniverse, that's also complicated and out of my wheelhouse...tldr: i have big ideas, but i'm not very good at backing them in fact or doing analytical stuff.

but...iiiiii need to, lmao. mental illness, but if i make a universe it has to be fully realized, it has to all make as much sense as possible, echo the canon, enhance it, feel real and be fluid...so if i'm not around too much it's because i'm trying to bolster myself with my sp knowledge ( ik, i'm a fake fan ) and watch/read/research high fantasy concepts and superhero/scientific fiction/dystopian stuff...so if anyone has any recommendations for me to watch or learn from in those realms, i'd appreciate it. again, this is intense...but i care a lot about my craft.

and specifically crafting something worthy of all of you, that makes sense, lives and breathes, reflects the show we love & is interesting.

ANYWAYS!!!! with that said, i got a cool ask about whether or not i have a gunslinger kyle? which? not yet? BUT YOU'RE A GENIUS BABY I AM SOOOOO ON IT!!! please let me cook and watch some things because actually, oh my god, i am very down. i'll update you. i might make a board to gather ideas, omg, omg, it'll be SPICY.

i got an ask about princess kylie, which, bless you, i am also still developing her character, i am going to pour over the books, watch some GOT, do some mapping out, watch some intricate dnd play throughs...and have some answers for you very soon: hang on, baby.

( she's little, bitchy, prissy and does need to be babysat, i'm afraid. )

got some on jersey i'm excited about! sorry for writing that ask meme about the sour skittles like that, again, writing has been trying for me lately and i had a concept that i wanted to share but wasn't sure how to express that. if you guys are alright with getting my asks in the form of notes some times i would appreciate it! anyways, keep your eyes out for some of those...if kyle week runs into next week, sorry.

idk...this is so long. all this to say...i'm really sorry? i haven't been a very solid creator lately, but i'm a little unstable rn. but i am working on it and i hope to be back on the horse by tonight and share my notes at least and show you guys how my brain is working.

in the mean time, please direct as many questions as you would like in the direction of riley, teri and ana who not only are epic writers but have been an epic support system/helping me get back into things.

thank you for caring, thank you for reading...keeping up with this blog and the questions and creating constantly is sometimes challenging, but very rewarding. i promise that i am not neglecting my asks or all of you because i don't care, its actually because i care very much and only want to give you stuff that is awesome and cool and well researched. so, again, just give me a second to get my barings and while it kind of eats at my bad bpd brain i might try and share stuff with you guys that's half baked because the feedback might help.

tldr: i love you, this made no sense, i'm a mess, but i am fine.

miss you and love you. happy kyle week.

-uncle nina

#sorry this is such a mess #tldr i am busy and a little unstable and my writing has been blah but i'm very into intense world building rn #and i want to do more research and figure stuff out before i try to randomly dish out answers #but i'm thinking now that maybe i should just tell yall what i'm thinking and see how you feel? idk #i do work hard on my character stuff so i hope u enjoy it #but yeah high fantasy is specifically hard for me so i'm watchin movies and reading books and stuff which is dorky #accuracy means a lot to me and its the only way i get relaxed when i feel comfortable in my characters and worlds #political stuff and sciencey stuff is also hard #i also dont even know how accurate that is to the tfbw plotline in actual sp so im trying to watch the show and play #the games idk im worried none of this is canon enough #bc i dont want it to all be fart jokes and asisnine but i do want them to be accurate to the show at least a little #nina stop bastardizing the sp canon #otherwise i am excited to answer my kyle questions i promise i have just been frazzled ill try to do stuff tonight #thanks for sticking with me and i really hope this makes sense i feel like i sound crazy i just...want to do good work #thats all i dont like to do work that feels shitty or lazy and in order to not do that i take a while to think

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