#or maybe im just salty i wrote down the right answer and then went back to change it bc im a dumbass | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starbuckie · 4 years

Text

𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤

challenge: time travel challenge by @justagirlinafandomworld

prompt: “we’re divorced?”

pairing: sirius black x reader

words: 5.7k words

warnings: FOURTH WALL BREAK!!(sorry im very excited about that), lots of angst, almost smut(hehe), sirius lowkey has a breeding kink, sirius is an asshole for a bit, the smallest bit of fluff, fix-it, and the same time travel theory as back to the future

summary: an unnatural occurrence lets a woman go back in time to try and change everything she’s known for the past twenty years.

a/n: wow, i normally don’t write for harry potter so this was a nice change. anyways, this is for yvette’s time travel writing challenge, and everybody say HAPPY BIRTHDAY YVETTE! i’m so sorry this is late, it got deleted and i needed to re-edit, but i truly appreciate your friendship and your lovely, amazingly beautiful self, and I’m so so glad that we became friends :) this fic is not beta-read at all, so if you see any mistakes tell me, but otherwise i really hope you enjoy this fic<3

main masterlist || harry potter masterlist

It still wasn’t over. After all she had lost, more specifically everyone she had lost, and the shitty cycle that she had to call her life, it still wasn’t over. The people she had watched the life drain from, the screams of those suffering from the loss caused by the Dark Lord, and yet life still hadn’t had its fill of torturing Y/N. Grimmauld Place felt empty without the kids, without the Weasleys, but they had gone back to their home and soon enough she would have to as well. Harry had gone back to Hogwarts with Dumbledore, though she’d argued to hold onto him just a bit longer after-

After Sirius had died.

Time had passed, maybe two or three weeks, but no matter what the woman couldn’t bring herself to get out of Sirius’ old bedroom, simply staring at the ceiling with her tears at bay. Her and Sirius had been a complicated thing, to say the least, a topic nobody had brought up since 1983, when she had banned it. Not as if there was much to talk about after the divorce and Sirius going to Azkaban. After Lily and James had died, after she had fought with Dumbledore for custody of Harry, after she had become a professor at Beauxbatons and moved to France without a second thought. Sirius had been locked up after he’d hurt her in the worst possible way, and Y/N’s heartbroken soul found no other reason to return to England.

But, she pushed those bad memories to the back of her mind. It seemed so trivial, looking back on it. Not the broken house, of course, that had been his own mistake. But Y/N had many regrets, all of them seeming to revolve around the mischievous black-haired man who she had fallen in love with as a teen. The night it went down, the night their relationship had fractured at the seams and fallen down, was her greatest one however. It had been so stupid, so, so stupid, but they’d both gotten caught up in the moment, and Y/N had let him die without knowing how much she was sorry for that night that they let their fears consume them.

The cries that she had tried so hard to contain finally broke free from the restraints of her heart. “I’m so sorry, Siri,” she whispered into the air, “I couldn’t save you this time.” As the hot, salty tears ran down her cheeks, Y/N shuffled across the room, letting her feet drag her to the old Black family room, the dark green walls embracing her rainy emotions.

A little gasp escaped her lips as she looked at the portraits among the wall. The Black family tree was faded along the age-old wall, but what she was really looking for was the burned out image of her raven-haired love. There, right next to Regulus, was a black spot, scorned and scarred by the prestigious family for being a blood traitor. Y/N smiled and traced the burn with her finger, remembering their fourth year when she had accompanied him home for the holidays so he wouldn’t be completely alone in the hellhole he had to call his house. Sirius had snuck them up to this room and spent the night talking in hushed whispers sworn secrets. “I’ll be yours forever, Siri, and I’m sorry for fighting with you. I wish-” she sniffled, glaring at the spot in the wall as she tried to garble out her words, “I wish, I could go back in time, and just fix it. Just me and you, and that stupid night, with the bloody fight about children because you deserve it all, darling.”

“Ah, I think you can.”

Y/N turned around, her eyes wide with fear. That was not Kreacher’s voice. There stood a younger woman, around nineteen, a scroll of paper and a quill in her hand. There was a whisper of a smirk on her face, brown eyes glittering even in the dimness in the room. “Who the hell are you?” Y/N looked at the door, which was still closed as she left it. She cast her wand out, pointing it at the stranger who did nothing but smile. “How did you get in here? Are you with the Lord?”

“With Voldemort?” The woman simply laughed. “Dude, I’m not with ‘the Lord’,” she added with air quotations. “Also I’m not really even here, so don’t you worry about that. My name’s Malia.”

Malia held her hand out, but Y/N kept her guard up. “You’re American. What brings you here? Are you a muggle?”

“Oh, nope, not a wizard, I’m just the author of this story.” Malia confided. “I’m here to tell you that you can fix this.”

“Fix… what?” Malia just rolled her eyes and sighed, staring up towards the ceiling as she spoke.

“God, did I write you to be hard of hearing now, too? I ought to fix that when I get back.” The woman blankly stared at the strange girl, wondering what the actual fuck she was talking about. “I can give you the chance to go back in time, Y/N. It won’t be for long, it’s really not gonna be interesting for more than two hours at most, but that should be enough time to tell the gang about what’s to come with Voldemort.”

“Like... time travel?” Y/N asked. The only way she knew how to time travel was the time turners. “But all of the ti-”

“Time turners were destroyed in the Department of Mysteries, I know, I know. Trust me, I’ve read Harry Potter more times than I’ve said ‘I love you’ to my parents.” Malia smiled. “I’m the author, I make the rules, and my rule is that I’m giving you two hours in 1978 to talk to Sirius so he can fix the emotional fucking mess left behind by J.K. Rowling.”

“Who’s J.K. Rowling?” Malia shuddered at the name.

“A raggedy-ass, transphobic bitch who wrote y’all into existence, but she’s not of importance right now.” She checked the small, rectangular box in her hand, which glowed and provided little light in the darkened room. “Let’s see, it’s currently eleven-forty, so you have until one-forty to find the Marauders and fix this future. It may not be fixed in the books in the future, but if you are able to do it here that’s all that matters.” Malia’s brown eyes were downcast, her bright and loud personality dimming for just a moment before returning to Y/N’s confused gaze once more. “Try not to screw up too much while you’re there, just enough that you defeat the Dark Lord the first time. Tell Sirius all you know and that should be enough for him to fix all the mistakes, but do not under any circumstances let him or anyone else know who you are. I wish you luck, Y/N, it was nice to meet ya in person.”

And with a peace sign in front of her face, she disappeared into a flash of neon pink light.

“Bloody hell! Fix my future? Talk to Sirius? If this even is time travel, then how am I supposed to get there- AH!” Y/N’s body felt like it was turning inside out, her guts being torn from her stomach and back into it again. A delirious giggle arose from her lips in the black void she was pulled into, and a soft chatter could be heard, like voices at the end of a tunnel.

“Blimey, looks like we got ourselves a nutter on school grounds.” Y/N’s arms flailed around, desperately seeking some sort of grounding surface to hold on to when her back hit a rough surface. There was an audible crack somewhere in her body, but she felt so sick that she couldn’t tell where.

“Are you okay, ma’am? You just appeared from the sky and hit the ground.” Warm, brown eyes met Y/N’s, a familiar mess of black curls resting atop of the boy’s head. Large, rounded glasses sat perched on the tip of his nose, and an impish smile, one she used to know so well before he died, met his lips.

“James,” she sighed. The boy stared at her strangely, and only then did she notice the three other boys and girls each behind them. Remus, Peter, Sirius, Lily, Marlene, and Alice.

Sirius.

The sight that met her eyes made her nearly emotional. It had technically been only three weeks since she had seen him, but here was the young boy she had fallen in love with. The one who charmed her with his smart words and witty retorts to her brush-offs, who used to hold her in his arms in the most intimate and gentle ways. His grey eyes sparkled with curiosity, the infamous Marauder mischief swirling within the silvery pools.

Seeing him so young tugged at her heartstrings, and though she wanted nothing more than to hold him in her arms and never let go, a small, niggling feeling at the back of her head held her back. Was there something wrong?

“You know me?” Oh right, she was currently thirty-five. Looking around she noticed that she was outside the quidditch pitch, and there were other students, staring at her with widened eyes. No one knew she was Y/N L/N, their fellow schoolmate and probably one of the very few of them that survived the Death Eaters attacks. None of them were aware how it ended, or how it was currently going for them back in 1996, and in this time there was the first Wizarding War going on and they had every right to be terrified for their lives.

James now took a more defensive stance, standing tall and holding his wand out. “Who are you?”

She couldn’t give him the answer, instead letting her mouth gape open as she stared at him with wide eyes. Y/N looked across the grounds for the nearest exit, which was down by Hagrid’s hut and into the Forbidden Forest. It was her only choice at this point, to hide in the dark, creepy space, maybe just until the students went away so she could find Sirius and talk to him alone. It’d be hard to separate him from the boys, but if Lily were occupied with James it sure would be easy.

Her younger, seventh-year self didn’t seem to be in the audience, thank Merlin, and with that knowledge, she got up and ran, ignoring her screaming muscles. That time travel really did a number on her.

As she ran through the crowd, shoving people aside, she heard the students mutter, too much in shock and disarray to stop the crazy, old woman who knew James Potter.

“This is dodgy.”

“Someone ought to tell Dumbledore about this.”

“She kinda looks like Y/N L/N.’

“Don’t insult the poor girl like that, that wonker is ages old.”

“Come back here! Who the bloody hell are you?” Y/N’s heart beat quickly in her chest, threatening to burst out. Only three minutes in the past and it was all going straight to shit. “Stupefy!”

Shit. “No, James, please don’t-“ Her body hit the ground and her eyes closed, the last thing she saw being the pumpkin patch by the hut.

“I see you’re awake now, Ms. L/N.” Dumbledore stood above Y/N in the hospital ward bed, his grey beard dangling in front of her face. Her first instinct was to start blaming him for everything that had happened, starting from Lily and James’ deaths to Sirius’, already opening her mouth to call him an old, senile cow, but then she realized that Harry hadn’t been sent to the Dursleys yet, much less been born yet, so none of it would have an effect on him. Y/N’s second instinct was to question how Dumbledore knew who she was in 1978, but her former Headmaster started to speak before she could do so. “I must admit, it’s very courageous, that stunt you just pulled. I don’t think Ms. Louie will be too happy about that.” Y/N sent him a questioning stare. “Malia, the girl you met earlier. Malia Louie.”

“Headmaster Dumbledore, how did you know it was me?” She was dressed in a white gown that went to her knees, and behind him she could see her blouse and jeans folded and clean. Ah, the Hospital Wing. She had brought the boys here more times than she could count in her years at Hogwarts. “I don’t exactly look as young as I used to.”

“Ah, don’t worry Ms. L/N, you’ve kept your good looks quite nicely, even in your older age.” He stroked his beard thoughtfully, his wrinkled eyes sparkling with joy. “And speaking of young, if you are still worrying yourself about your younger self, you can put that to a stop. I am aware that you are not able to tell anyone who you are, and time travel is exceptionally dangerous if you are seen by the other version of yourself. I’ve already told the students that you were just a stray witch, misguided in your ways and that you were well taken care of. However, I think that brings us to the question of what your intentions are in the past, Ms. L/N.”

“Headmaster, I don’t think I can tell you about my business here. I’ve already messed up by letting the school see me by letting everyone see me, I don’t know why that girl even sent me here, it’s clear that this was a mistake.” Y/N sat up on the headboard, feeling her eyes fill with tears once again. The tall arches of windows let the sun in the room, and she could see the specks of dust swirling around in the golden light. It had to be close to the end of the year for them, maybe sometime around April or May, near the end of N.E.W.T.s at least. She could imagine that it’d be easy for her to get out of Hogwarts for the day, with all the students studying for the stressful exams in the library, maybe she'd make her way to Hogsmeade and walk around or visit Hagrid under a false name to have some tea. He was always open for a nice cuppa with strangers on any free day he had. “Thank you Headmaster, for your kindness, but I really ought to be going. I-it was nice to see you.”

Y/N started to help herself out of the bed, swinging her feet over to touch the cool stone ground. Bones cracked with pain and fatigue, her muscles stretching sluggishly. Merlin, that she was not expecting that much hurt from the fall, but she should have never underestimated James Potter. No one ever should if they want to keep their good mind and sanity.

Dumbledore handed her her clothes, cracked lips set in a straight line as he nodded solemnly. “I hope you accomplish whatever it is you are here to do, Ms. L/N, but I have no doubt that you will.” With a sly wink, he added, “You were always one of our most ardent and bright students.”

Y/N let herself smile, and with a wave, swiftly brought herself to the door. “Thank you, Headmaster.”

After slipping outside, she ran down the corridors, echoes of her feet ringing lightly behind her. The courtyard proved to be empty and she quickly ducked behind a column and tugged her jeans on hastily, making sure that no professors came walking past. Though the sky proved to be bright and cheerful, a slight breeze carried through, making her fall off balance and fall on the cemented ground.

“Are you okay, darling? You look like you’re in need of a little help.” Y/N looked up to the speaking figure, one that she both loved and dreaded to see.

She gathered herself quickly, her mind running fast and heart beating out of her chest as she tried to get out. “Yes, I am okay, thank you for asking. I think I’ll just get up and going now, I don’t need to take time out of your day like this-”

“I know who you are, Y/N.”

Y/N came to a full stop, going against her brain that screamed at her to run away. Sirius looked downtrodden, his grey eyes watering despite the small hint of a smirk on his face. Though he was always one for playing around and not taking anything seriously, she knew when it was time to stop pretending and get real. “How’d you know it was me, Sirius?”

“You really don’t look bad for your age, darling.” He offered her a hand to help her up and she took it graciously, eyeing him nearly guiltily and forgetting about her promise to Y/N. But that was useless now, this moment with her first love was much more important. “Also you have the tattoo on your chest. I knew it was you the moment you landed on school grounds.”

She traced his gaze to her left collarbone, where a paw print, just barely visible beneath her low-cut blouse, sat. It was his, or Snuffles’, paw print, and at this point in time they had probably gotten it done about three months before. He had one for her too, a horseshoe for her horse patronus, right on his left side of his chest too. So they’d always be right next to each other’s hearts, as cheesy as it seemed.

But they were dumb, lovesick teenagers, and they acted the part well too. Their love was all-consuming, shagging in under the bleachers at the quidditch pitch and making out under the stars. It was fast, everything was fast, decisions, ideas, classes, all of them under the impression that they had to do everything right then or they’d be dead before they got to actually live. They had dreams of marriage, and a big, big family, obviously so far away from his family so they could never hurt their children’s lives the way they had hurt his.

They were fantasies, Y/N had known that well enough when she and Sirius got divorced, but it was something that eighteen year-old Sirius Black held close to his heart. No matter how shitty his life got, he was always a firm believer in a happy ending. In their happy ending.

“How am I right now?” They now stood over the Black Lake, staring into the glittering depths of the water where some mermaids could be seen sneaking peeks at the handsome boy and the strange lady who had fallen from the sky.

Sirius stared at her questioningly for a moment. “How are you doing right now? I mean, I believe that I should be asking you that ques- oh, Merlin, I’m such a git, you meant your younger self.” Y/N laughed at that, her heart lifting with the goofiness of the old Sirius relieving an ache in her heart that she had had for so long. Not that old (it felt weird to say that) Sirius had been anything less than silly and snarky, but it was never directed towards her. It was nice to have the resemblance of their old relationship back, even if it was just for a fleeting moment. “I suppose that you’re okay. You didn’t see, well, your big moment on the field, but at this point Lily has probably opened her big, fat mouth and told you. N.E.W.T.s are just finishing up, so you’re much more light-hearted than during the study season.”

“I really did have a stick up my arse during exam time, you always told me to loosen up-”

“Y/N, cut out the small talk, I think it’s okay for me to ask how and what is happening.” Sirius cut in.

So she told him. Y/N had always been upfront with people about everything. Or rather, she had learned how to be upfront with people after her and Sirius’ divorce. Without details of the deaths, she explained how she was sent back into the past to fix it in some conceivable way. However, she did tell him about the fall out. Maybe she wanted him to understand her pain, even though it was a younger him, but she had to admit to herself that it was because she just wanted Sirius, in whatever form life gave her to hear out her grievances and apologies.

Since her Sirius was dead before she could.

“We’re divorced?” Sirius looked about ready to break down into tears, almost as if the concept of them breaking up or separating was foreign to him. “What exactly did we fight over, Y/N? That doesn’t seem normal for the two of us.” Sirius asked.

“Well, to be fair, it wasn’t a normal predicament for us. either…”

Sirius slammed the door shut, efficiently pinning her against it with his white button up ruffled up, navy tie hanging from his neck loosely. Y/N’s arms were held down tightly against the oak wood, the sensation of the cold door burning into her rather warm skin making her squeal. Her husband’s tongue worked its way through her parted lips, low groans rising from the back of his throat from the way she moaned in tandem with his hips pushing into hers. Legs wrapped around his tapered waist, the pink, floral skirt Y/N wore rising high on her thighs, revealing more of her flesh to the lust-filled man. Both of their giggles echoed off the hallway walls of their small cottage home, just four miles west of their best friends’.

As the twenty year-old man threw his wife unceremoniously on the bed, he shed himself of his shirt and swiftly unbuttoned his slacks, throwing them haphazardly across the room. Merlin, Y/N looked ethereal laying spread out on the bed, panties around her left ankle, swollen lips parted with short puffs of air leaving them. “You just get right down to business, don’t you, Black.”

Crawling over his body, his hot breath hit her neck as he growled against her skin. “Could say the same thing about you, darling.” Sirius’ lips made their way down every inch, every curve, nook, and cranny of Y/N’s body, smoothly slipping her clothes off as he did so. Her sweet gasps filled the bedroom, back arching off the bed to meet his chest. “I’m going to put a baby in you tonight, sweetheart, we’re-”

Y/N sat up straight, her eyebrows trained in confusion at her husband. “What? A baby?”

Sirius’ heart pounded in his chest. “Yes.” He remarked in a clipped tone. “Is that not what you wanted?”

Her mind recalled her words from earlier that day, as she chatted happily with Lily about the news of her pregnancy. “Siri, I said I may one day enjoy having a kid of my own. Not right now, of course, but later. After all, we only got married a few months ago, don’t you think we should hold off a bit on that? We’re twenty years-old, Siri, there’s so many years for that.”

Rage filled Sirius’ blood like a spreading fire. In all honesty, it wasn’t so much about his anger as it was his hurt and fear. Fear that she had realized how fucked up he truly was, fear that she realized what he had known all along- that she deserved better than him. “So you don’t want a baby with me?”

“I never said I didn’t want that, Sirius, I just said that I’m not ready!” Y/N yelled back. At this point both of them stood on opposite sides of the bed, faces hot with tears. “We’re in the middle of a bloody war, people we know, people we love, have lost their lives, and it is not the ideal environment to raise a child, Sirius! Just because James and Lily are ready to have one doesn’t mean that I am too!”

“When will you be ready, Y/N? When will it ever be enough time for you? When will I be enough for you?” The heartbroken girl tried to interject, but her voice was cut off by her husband’s quickly enough. Sirius climbed onto the bed, holding her chin harshly with one hand. “Tell me, did you ever want to be with me in the first place?”

“Yes, Sirius, of course I wanted to be with you.” His heart hurt looking at the love of his life in tears, but even that was able to melt his cold facade. “I love you more than anything in the world.”

“Then fucking prove it, Y/N.” With that declaration, he removed his hand from her face and gathered his clothes, slamming everything in their shared room as Y/N quivered, knees ready to buckle on the spot. “I’m going out, don’t wait up for me.”

As soon as the front door shut, she fell to the ground in tears, the laughter that once filled their home replaced with the sound of her shattered heart.

Y/N had done her best to not tear up during her explanation of the events that had taken that night, but Sirius' eyes watered, refusing to believe the truth. “No. No. I didn’t do that. Y/N, tell me,” he gripped her biceps with trembling hands, “please tell me I didn’t really do that. I can’t believe that I-I, that I-”

“You were drunk, Sirius, I don’t think you truly knew what you were saying at the time.” She sighed, “But people always say that drunken words are just sober thoughts.” Y/N rubbed her arms, just shivering slightly in the Scotland breeze. “You came back two hours later punching the wall and breaking it, and that’s when I knew that we wouldn’t last.”

The raven-haired boy’s head started to shake, even more mortified of the actions that his future self, the man he’d be in just two years' time, had done. “I packed up my things, not that there were many, we’d only moved into the house a month before, left, and I sent the divorce papers a week later. It was probably better that way, you would’ve divorced me if I hadn’t done it first.” Y/N had gotten used to telling her sob story to colleagues at Beauxbatons, to her family, but it felt different with pre-divorce Sirius. Of course, she had never thought she’d be in this citation either, so no one could really blame her for feeling weird. “You signed them easily, and my lawyer made sure that I never had to see you again.” Until Lily and James died.

“Until…” Sirius led on.

“Merlin’s beard, Sirius, you’ve always been able to read my mind. Shouldn’t have doubted it for a second.” He smiled at the sentiment, gesturing for her to continue. “I can’t tell you, Sirius, I hope you can understand that.”

“Why, Y/N, what happens that can be any worse in the future?” Oh dear, Sirius, you really do not want the answer to that question. She needed any way out of this conversation, after all running away was what she did best, and her eyes already searched for several routes to which she could run. Not that Y/N could ever outrun Sirius in his animagus form, but it was nice to have the belief that she could. The boy sensed her distress and grabbed hold of her hand. “You don’t have to tell me, darling, but I have to admit that I am a bit worried, just in the slightest.”

Y/N let herself calm down, squeezing Sirius’ hand and noticing his watch. She had actually given him that watch, gold-plated and dark grey metal, but it wasn’t the beauty of the gift that caught her eye, but rather the actual time on it. One-thirty.

How had that much time gone by so quickly? She was going to be sucked into the black void of time travel again in ten minutes, and that wasn’t nearly enough time to unload nearly twenty years worth of history onto Sirius. No, he would go insane from that much knowledge, which was exactly against what Malia had advised.

“I don’t have enough time to tell you everything that happens in the future, Sirius. But what I am about to tell you is vital, absolutely vital for the good of all of us in the future.” Sirius nodded with a serious sort of smile on his face. “Don’t let Peter be Lily and James’ secret keeper. When the time comes that they move away, I’m not going to tell you where yet, do not under any circumstances let Peter be their secret keeper. I know he’s one of our best friends right now, and do not tell anyone about this, but he’s going to betray us in the worst way possible.”

While Sirius was shocked, he nodded solemnly and ran a hand through his long hair. “I won’t tell anyone, Y/N. Can I fix us, Y/N? I don’t know if you should be letting the key to a happier future rest in my hands.”

“I full heartedly trust that you’ll do some good, whatever the outcome may be. As for fixing us, I hope you can, but depending on what happens we’ll just have to wait and see.” She sighed, “If you want my opinion on it, I think that we both should have waited longer to get married. It was right after James and Lily got married, but we aren’t and never will be them. We both had a lot of growing up to do, so I would take it slowly. Communicate your wants and needs in the relationship and in the end it may not even be us together. But I know you, Siri, don’t let this get in the way of your entire life. The most important part is that you tell James and Lily about Peter.”

She glanced back up the school grounds where students could start to be seen leaving their classes. “You better get back to the castle, Sirius. McGonagall is going to come for your arse and this time the boys aren’t going to be able to cover for you.”

“If they knew where I was, darling, I don’t even think they’d believe me.” Sirius chuckled.

Y/N nodded in agreement and pulled Sirius into a tight hug. “You can do this, sweetheart, and even if you can’t, it will not stop me from loving you any less. Maybe the future wasn’t meant to be changed, but regardless of whether that is true or not, I know that you will try your hardest, Sirius. Just try not to die, okay?”

The boy was still clutching onto her tightly, his tears soaking her rose-colored blouse. “I’ll do my best, darling.”

With one last kiss on the forehead, she smiled at him. “I know you will, Siri.”

Y/N’s arse hit the floor once again, her spine cracking once again. “What’s the year?” She yelled out, reaching for the walls of the black family room.

But it wasn’t there. Upon opening her eyes, she saw James, Lily, and Sirius sitting at a wooden table in her old white cottage. A nice tea set, her grandmother’s as she realized later, sat in the center, along with a large stack of letters. “Y/N, what the bloody hell happened to you, I’ve been worried sick!”

Her red-headed best friend scurried over to her, brushing invisible dirt off her shoulders and pulling her up abruptly. James fixed the glasses on his nose, cleaning them off with his striped jumper. “You look a little disheveled right now, Y/N, what ran you over?”

“You know who she reminds me of right now, Jamie? That crazy witch friend of Dumbledore’s that made her way onto campus back in seventh year.” Lily giggled as she hugged Y/N.

“Merlin’s beard, you’re right!” James walked over to the woman of the hour, ruffling her hair with a smirk on his face. “If you were about twenty years older I’d have no trouble believing you were the same person.”

While Lily and James recalled their memories from the strange woman all those years ago at Hogwarts, Sirius pulled Y/N aside, an arm wrapped around her waist. The warmth radiating from his body was nice, embracing her in a comfort she hadn’t felt in so long.

“I’m going to go ahead and believe that I did something right?” Sirius grabbed her hand, and only then did she notice the coolness of metal sitting on her left ring finger. There sat the single band of gold, a small ruby encased in its plating. She had once joked that diamonds were too overrated, and he went out and got her the most vibrant gem he could find, claiming that it was just like her. But regardless of its shape, size, or type of gem, it was there.

“Yeah, Siri,” Y/N replied with tears in her eyes, “you did good.”

“Oi, Blacks, stop making out and get over here, we got a letter from Minnie!” James yelled, making both wives chuckle. “Harry’s gotten himself in detention for punching Malfoy again.”

“Oh, thank Merlin, the boy deserves a few more good hits.” Sirius laughed.

“McGonagall still talks to us?” Y/N asked in amazement. “You’ve got to get me caught up.”

“Don’t worry, darling, we’ve got all the time in the world.” Sirius gently placed his lips onto hers, and for once in nearly twenty years, Y/N felt at peace. There were no more hasty warnings of the future, no psychotic old men coming after her family, no young girls rushing in to tell her how to fix her screwed up life. Cracked, pink lips moving against her own, his tongue delving into her mouth, and Y/N knew she was finally off the clock.

313 notes · View notes

zmayadw · 3 years

Text

Evening to all :)

All right, so I finaly did it, the last chapter of my original story is finaly done :) It took me a while, what with the episode 8 being released at that time, and with some other stuff I wrote in the between then and now, but it is done. Well, one more part is left, basicly like an epilogue, wich will be posted in a couple of days, too, but the story itself ends with this one.

Anyway, enjoy, and I wish you all a nice evening :)

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 26

Jakes POV

„How is she?“ I asked Jessy as I entered the room. She got her head up from the book she was reading to look at me. „Still the same.“ She said. I sighed, walking to her bed. I took her hand, placing a soft kiss on her wrist. „The doctor was here earlier.“ Jessy informed me. „He said she is doing fine, that there's not any medical reason to be worried about.“ I just stared at her sleeping face. „Then why won't she wake up, Jessy?“ I asked her desperatly. „She will, Jake.“ she said to me, and I turned arround facing her. She smiled at me „When she's ready.“ Four days passed since they operated on her, and I was worried. Maybe Jessy was right, but her words didn't bring me any peace. She collected her stuff, and came to me. „Call me if you need anything. And if there's any change.“ She said hugging me. „Thanks, I will.“ I said, Jessy smiling once more at me before leaving. With Jessy gone, I moved myself lying next to her, leaning my forehead on the side of her head. „Please, Maya, you have to wake up.“ I whispered to her ear „ I can't do this alone, I need you with me.“

I felt a hand on my shoulder and flinched, turning my head. That nice nurse from before was smiling at me „Sorry, dear, didn't mean to fright you.“ I must have dozed off. „It's fine“ I said. „Is something wrong?“ I asked alarmed, and she smiled again „No, dear. I just need to change some things, so I have to ask you to leave for a while.“ I turned my head back to Maya, she looked so peaceful. „Dont worry, dear“ the nurse said „I'll take good care of her, just like I did before.“ I turned my look back to her. She smiled so heartedly at me, I got a feeling she had a special liking for Maya. And she did stick up for me when they brought Maya in here, and I refused to leave her and was almost dragged out by security. So I felt at peace to leave Maya with her. „Ofcourse, I'll let you do your thing.“ I said, getting up from the bed. I got to the doors when I turned back to her. „I'm sorry, but I don't know your name.“ I said and the nurse looked at me „It's Doris. Why do you ask, dear?“ „So I can properly thank you.“ I said. „So, thank you, Doris, for everything.“ She smiled wide at me „Oh, dear, you're sweet, and I knew I was right about you, but no need to thank me, really.“ She said and winked at me. I smiled back at her a bit confused before leaving the room.

I went outside, getting coffee and just sat at the bench in front of the hospital. I hated being here again. And seeing her back at that bed once more made me angry. And scared. More scared than the last time. All this uncertainty was driving me insane. If everything is fine like the doctor said, why isn't she awake yet? I was deep into my thoughts, that it took me a while to notice my phone was ringing. „Hey, Hannah.“ I answered the call. „Hi, Jake. How is she? Any change?“ she asked. I sighed „Nothing yet.“ „I'm sure everything will be fine soon, she's a fighter.“ She said reasuringly to me. „I hope so.“ I said. „I don't need to ask how you are“ she said „I can hear it in your voice. Did you eat anything today?“ I could hear the worry in her voice for me, and I could have easily lied, but she would know. „Not yet, I will later.“ „Jake, you can't do that to yourself.“ She said „And I won't let you. I'll be there in 10, and I'm taking you for lunch.“ „Hannah, that's nice of you, but rea...“ she didnt let me finish. „Stop it, I don't want to hear it!“ She almost yelled at me, and it made me smile. She really was worried for me, just like a sister would be. I was still geting used to that, of being someones brother. „All right, Hannah, I'll be waiting for you outside.“ „Good.“ She said „And besides, there is something I want to talk to you about anyway. Allrighty, see you in a while.“ „See you, Hannah.“ I said ending the call. I got up from the bench, taking the last sip of my coffe, heading out from the hospital area to meet with her.

The lunch with Hannah passed mostly with her talking and me thoughtfully nodding and saying a few words. She tried hard to lift my spirit up at least a little, and I was grateful to her, but only one thing could pull me back to normal now. „Just think about my proposal. I know you're worried about Maya, we all are, but just think about it, ok?“ Hannah said to me as she drove me back to the hospital. „Yeah, I will.“ I said back to her. She hugged me tight „Hang in there, and call if you need anything.“ „Thanks, Hannah.“ I said hugging her back before leaving the car. Walking back inside the hospital, I did think about Hannahs proposal. She was moving in with Thomas, and she wanted to leave her apartment to me. Wich wasn't a bad idea, actually. I liked the apartment, and besides, when Maya gets out of hospital, she would be more comfortable there than at the motel. And that one room has a nice big window, she would love all that natural light for her drawing. I chuckled to myself at my thoughts. Not im my wildest dreams was I expecting to be thinking of something like this, ever. But she changed me so much, she gave me hope again. She made it so that I felt like I finaly found my quiet place in all this chaos. She was the missing link I was looking for all this time. She became my everything. I entered her room with a smile for the first time after days. And I froze. Her bed was empty. It felt like my heart actually stopped beating for a moment, panic hitting at me like a truck. What happened? I was gone for a few hours, she was fine, what the fuck happened?! „Jake?“ I swallowed hard, turning my head to the sound of my name being called. My eyes swelled with tears, as hers locked with mine. In a few quick steps I came to her, carefully embracing her in a hug, burying my face to her neck. „Don't you ever scare me like this again.“ I said, unsuccessfully hiding my sobs. „I don't think my heart could take it.“ She released me from a hug, her eyes also full of tears. She rested her palm on my cheek, and I closed my eyes taking a deep breath, relieved to feel her touch again. „I knew you wouldn't leave me, that you'd come back to me.“ I said opening my eyes. She smiled at me, her voice raspy „I could never leave you. Nothing can keep me away from you.“ She kissed me then, the kiss salty from out tears. Doris sighed next to us „Oh, the young love..what a beautiful thing it is.“

Doris and me helped her back to bed and she tapped with her hand beside her for me to join. I got next to her and she rested her head on my chest. „How you feeling, angle?“ I asked her. „Tired“ she said „And in pain.“ „Don't worry, hun“ Doris said „I gave you some 'good stuff' now, it will help.“ „Thanks, Doris.“ She said with a weak smile, Doris winking at her before leaving the room. She stirred a bit, making herselff more comfortable „You won't leave, right?“ she said to me sleepily, the meds Doris gave her starting to work. „Ofcourse not“ I said, kissing the top of her head „You just rest, angel, I'll be right here when you wake up.“ She smiled and fell asleep instantly. I just stared through the window, the feeling of her steady breathing relaxing me. I felt my eyes getting heavier, and before I knew it, I too fell asleep.

Mayas POV

It was early in the morning when I woke up. I felt a bit better, but was still in a lot of pain. Jake was still sleeping. And even asleep, he looked tired, the rings under his eyes showing again. Doris entered the room, smiling at me. „Good morning, hun.“ She wispered to me as she came next to the bed checking on my IV. „'Morning.“ I said smiling back at her. She glanced at Jake „I was right about him after all.“ She said and winked at me. I chuckled silently „You sure wer, Doris.“ „Well, rest some more, hun. I'll be back shortly with your breakfast.“ She said, smiling at me again leaving the room. „What was that about?“ I turned my head, Jake looking at me sleepily.“It's not nice to eavesdrop.“ I grinned at him. „It was kinda hard not to.“ He said raising his eyebrow at me. I laughed „All right, you got a point there.“ He smiled at me, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. „It's good to see you laughing again.“ He got serious then „I'm sorry, angel.“ „What for?“ I asked. „For not being there with you.“ he said and sighed „I shouldn't have left you alone. I've let you down again.“ „Hey, that's not true.“ I said „I basicly forced you to leave, so if anyone is to be blamed, it's me then.“ „Even so, but I wasn't there.“ He said. „Jake“ I said softly, and he looked at me „Don't do this to yourself. It's not your fault this happened.“ I could see he was troubled with this. „Who is to say that the same thing wouldn't happen even if you were there?“ I asked him. „I can't, so please, don't torture yourself with 'what if's'. It happened, and I just want to move on, leave it all behind, now that it's finally over.“ He just looked at me „I don't know how you can so easily just move on.“ I sighed „Because, I don't want for it to take over my life. I want to focus on good things ahead of me, not dwell in the past.“ I placed my palm on his face and smiled at him „I want to focus on us.“ He kissed me softly, when Doris voice came from the door „Listen to her, dear, she speaks wisely.“ She said, winking at us. „She sure does, Doris.“ He said, not taking his eyes off me. She came to the bed bringing the food tray. „Now, lets get some food in you, hun. You will need it to get better.“ She said. Jake helped me to sit up, leaning on the pillow, Doris placing the tray in front of us. „I brought some extra, so there is enough for both of you.“ she said and winked at us, before leaving the room. „She sure likes you.“ he said to me as she left. I grinned at him „What to say, I'm just so darn adorable.“ He shook his head at me „And still impossible.“ I grinned even more „Even so, you still love me.“ He looked dreamily at me and smiled „More then you can imagine.“

The rest of my days in hospital passed fast. Jake was mostly with me, making sure to leave me with some kind of entertaintment when he left, either to help with Hannahs moving or for something else. He brought me his laptop, since mine got broken, with bunch of downloaded movies and books on it. Jessy also came to see me as often as she could. I was grateful for everything, but at some point all I wanted was some peace and quiet.

„Are you sure you don't want me to call Jessy to come?“ Jake asked me once more before leaving. „I'm sure“ I said „Don't worry, and don't get me wrong, but some alone time will be nice.“ „Humf, fine.“ He said „But call me if you get bored or anything and I'll be back right away.“ „I will.“ I said and smiled. He kissed me before heading for the doors. „See you soon, angel.“

With Jake gone, the room was quiet again, which was relaxing. I closed my eyes just apprieciating the silence, trying to get some sleep. But the nightmare was back. The images of what happened haunted my dreams repeatedly. Jake noticed it too, but I dismissed his worry quickly every time. He tried convincing me to talk about it with someone, anyone, even if it wasnt him, but I always said I'm fine, that it's not necessary. But he was right after all. I should.

With a sigh, I turned on the side staring through the windown, when a knock came from the doors. I turned, and laughed. A cute teddy bear holding a heart with 'Get well soon!' written on it was smiling at me from the door frame. The person holding it peeped his head behind it and grinned „Hello, gorgeous.“ „Hey, Phil.“ I smiled at him „I was worried you forgot about me.“ I said. He was the only one that hasn't visited me, at least till now. „That could never happen, gorgeous.“ He said walking over to me. „I just...waited for the right moment to come.“ He grinned sitting on the bed next to me. I laughed „So, Jessy informed you it's safe to come now, huh?“ I said raising my eyebrow at him. He grinned even more „Something like that.“ I shook my head „Well, I'm glad you came.“

„You know, my job offer still stands, gorgeous. I would still very much like you to do it.“ Phil said to me after a while. I chuckled „Can I at least get out of this place first? Then we can discuss it further.“ „Ofcours. I just wanted to let you know the offer still stands.“ He grinned devilishly and winked „Just so you don't forget about it.“ I laughed „Oh, don't worry, I never forget about the jobs being offered to me.“ „Good.“ He said and winked again. „Anyway, gorgeous, unfortunately I have to go now. Some of us don't have the luxury to lay in bed all day.“ He said getting up and grinning at me. He stood there for a moment, his face getting serious. He leaned then, embracing me in tight hug „I'm glad you're back with us, gorgeous.“ He said to my ear and kissed me on the cheek before moving from me. I smiled „Me too, Phil, me too.“ I took the teddy and grinned „And thank's for this guy.“ He grinned back „No worries, gorgeous.“ „Hello there.“ A voice sounded at the doors. Phil raised his eyebrow looking at me „Now it really is time I go.“ He smiled once more at me „Take care, gorgeous. See you soon.“ He turned and nodde at the person entering the room „Loverboy.“ Jake did the same walking towards my bed, looking extremely calm, and I was surprised. As they passed eachother, Phil stopped „Hey, loverboy?“ Jake turned to him and Phil's fist colided with his face, sending him to the floor. „Phil!“ I jumped in my bed, wincing instantly from the pain. Phil didn't even spare me a glance, he just leaned down closer to Jake „I told you to take care of her.“ Jake just looked at him, not trying to do anything. Doris bursted to the room „Phil Hawkins!“ she yelled „How dare you come to 'my house' and make a mess?!“ The two just continued to look at eachother, when Phil finaly straightened and turned to Doris with the most wide smile „Sorry, Doris.“ He said walking towards her „I owed him that.“ He gave her a quick peck on the cheek before heading for the doors „Hope I'll see you and the others soon at the Aurora.“ Doris shook her head after him „Schmack.“ She turned to Jake „You all right there, dear?“ she asked him as he got up. „I'm fine, thanks Doris.“ He said and she looked at him „Mhm, sure you are. I'm still gonna brig you some ice for that.“ She said and walked out. „I'm fine.“ Jake said to me seeing my expression. He came and sat next to me. „Thats was very unexpected of you. I was sure you would fight him back.“ I said and he looked at me a bit sad „Well, he was right.“ I sighed „Are we back to that again?“ „What? To me not looking after you? Ofcourse, I will never forgive myself for it.“ Now he sighed desperately „I'm sorry, angel, but I can't just get so easily over it. Maybe with time, but for now it still sits heavy on my shoulders.“ I saw how much all of it still bothered him, and I knew no matter what I might say he wouldn't listen. „All right“ I said after a moment „But, just promise me, you will try to let go off that. For me.“ He half smiled „I promise, angel.“ I pulled him to me for a kiss, and he winced. Doris came back giving Jake the ice pack. „Thank you , Doris.“ He said taking it from her. „You're welcome, dear.“ She said winking before leaving again. I took the ice pack from him „Come here you.“ I said and pulled him to lay next to me. Placing the pack on the spot that was really red by now and started to swell he winced again „Ouch!“. „I'm sorry.“ I said quickly and he grinned at me. „Ohh you, that was mean!“ He laughed „Sorry, angel, couldn't resist.“

„Ready to leave, hun?“ Doris asked smiling from the doors holding my discharge papers. „Definitely!“ I said cheerfuly. She came to me and hugged me „Now, hun, as much as I like you, I hope I'll never see you again.“ She moved from me and winked „At least not in here.“ I chuckled „I hope so too, Doris. And, thank you, again, for everything.“ „No need to thank me, hun.“ She turned to Jake and winked „Now, dear, you take good care of her, this one's a keeper.“ „You can say that again, Doris.“ He said back, and to the surprise of both of us, walked to her and gave her a hug. „And I also thank you for everything.“ He released her, and with glazing eyes she waved her hand at us „Oh, you two..get going now, before you get me even more teary.“ She smiled and squeezed us both on the hand before leaving the room „Take care, kids.“

Feeling the sun on my face as we stepped out from the hospital felt so good. „So, do you maybe want to go somewhere first?“ Jake asked me as we walked towards the car. „I mean, you were in there for quite a wile.“ I smiled at him „Yeah, thats true. But I still feel a bit tired. Maybe tomorrow.“ As much as I appriciated being out, I still needed to rest. But I also wasn't very eager of the thought of returning back to the motel. Not after all that happened there. He smiled back at me „As you wish, angel. We got to the apartment then.“ „Apartment? Not the motel?“ I asked surprised. „Ahm, well yeah.“ He started „I hope you don't mind, but I got all your stuff and took them to Hannah's place.“ He got a bit nervous „I mean, I am staying there now that she's moved in with Thomas. And to be honest, I thought you might feel...less uneasy there.“ I stopped walking, and he turned to look at me. „Everything all ri...“ But I didn't let him finish. I pulled him in a tight hug „Thank you. You have no idea how glad I am to hear this. I so didn't want to go back to the motel. Not after everything.“ I felt tears coming to my eyes. „I know, angel.“ He said, and a sob escaped me. Then another, and another. He hugged me tighter „It's ok, angel, everything will be fine. I've got you now.“ He just held me there in a tight hug, letting me cry on his shoulder, for as long as I needed it.

„Ohh, this room is amazing with all this natural light!“ I squealed as Jake showed me around the apartment. He chuckled „I thought you might like it. Hence that big table there.“ I turned grinning to him „You did this for me?“ „Ofcourse, angel.“ I rushed to him throwing my hands around his neck and kissing him, but winced from the pain in my shoulder. „All right, that's enough excitement for you for now.“ He said ushering me out of the room. He lead me to the couch, made me sit then lifted my feet up. „Now don't move from here unless it's really necessary.“ He said stern with a raised eyebrow. „Oh, come on, that's not needed.“ I said protestingly. He chuckled „Maybe, but just take it easy for a day or two more.“ I was about to protest again, but he looked at me, making such a puppy face that I couldn't possibly say no to him. „Argh, all right, although I feel fine, I'll do it for you.“ „Thank you, angel.“ He said and leaned to kiss me. „Now, can I get you anything? Drink, food?“ he asked and i grinned „Well, I would kill for a coffee.“ He laughed hard „Why I'm not surprised about that.“ He said standing up. „Well, since I'm not allowed to move from this spot, I hope you're ready to indulge my demands.“ I said grinning. He smiled „For you, angel, I'll do anything.“

-------------------------------------------------------------

3 MONTHS LATER

„Just come to the Aurora tonight, Jessy, I will tell you everything then.“ I said to her on the phone, as I entered the apartment. „Fine, be all secretive then.“ She said sulky. I laughed „No need for that tone, you know that won't work on me. I'm still not gonna tell you anything now.“ „Ahhh, fine! See you tonight then.“ „See you, Jessy.“ I entered the kitchen, Jake sitting at the table with his laptop. He smiled „Hey, angel.“ „Hey babe.“ I said going to him for a kiss. „How was with dr. Barret?“ he asked. „It was ok.“ I said sitting next to him. „It actualy feels good to talk about it with someone.“ I smiled „Thank you for talking me into doing it.“ „No need to thank me, angel.“ He said smiling back. I sighed „I hope it doesn't bother you that it's not you that I can talk to about it.“ He took my hand, pulling me from the chair to sit on his lap „I don't really care who you talk about it with, angel. Heck, I wouldn't care if you said you wanted to talk to Phil about it. As long as you get better.“ I laughed „Huh, you know, now that you mentioned it, they do say that barkeepers are a good listeners. So kinda close to psychiatrist.“ I tilted my head and said teasingly „It would definitely be cheeper. And beside, I'm sure Phil wouldn't mind listening to me, me being all vulnerable around him, and..“ „Ok,ok, no need to continue.“ He said quickly interupting me. „You just stick with dr. Barret.“ I laughed „Awww, babe, will you ever be at ease about Phil?“ „Probably not.“ He said thoughtfully. I smiled „Not even now, when I'm about to move in with you?“ He grinned „Not even then.“ I chuckled „You're hopeless then.“ He gave me a quick kiss. „Sooo“ he started grinning again„You think Jessy will be happy when you tell her the news about you moving here?“ „Happy?“ I said, „No, I don't think so.“ He looked confused at me, and I grinned „She will be thrilled.“

A/N: Ok, so after a short, but lovely chat with @lovingstudentangel who got a bit confused with how I ended the previous chapter, with the part of Jake visiting a grave, thinking it was the end of the story, so I want to clarifie it for her, or anyone else who might have been equaly confused. It was his mother grave that he visited, and I used that part as a clifhanger. I hope all is in the clear now :)

#duskwood #duskwood everbyte #duskwood fanfiction #duskwood mc #duskwood jake #duskwood jake x mc

27 notes · View notes

createuntiltheendoftime · 5 years

Text

Okay so this is that fic/one shot i wrote all night. here i guess. its inspired by @discocritic’s post and also gokarting yesterday godammit don’t judge me

im so sorry, this is terribly formatted and there are so many poorly written sentences, its basically word vomit. I'm so disappointed but so not surprised.

“Party, the race is gonna start and we don’t have much time!”

Of course. Of the seven word quota Kobra spoke per day, it had to be complaining that Party was taking too long.

“Phoenix Witch, Kobes, cool your jets.” Secretly, Party wished his brother would stop racing. He loved the fact that Kobra found something he loved, but it was so damn dangerous, and their lives were already filled with enough of that.

But Party walked out the door with him again and again.

And again today, to Kobra’s insistent hand waving and gesturing to the Trans Am. “Any longer and I woulda left without you, asshole. Ghoul’s already at the Track, Jet’s... somewhere. He’s with the Kid.”

Even more words. Weird day.

Luckily, the two of them weren’t all that far from the Crash Track, only an hour or so, and they got there and hour before the race started.

“You’re paranoid, Kobes. You have all the time in the world.” Party grinned as he stepped out of the car

Kobra pulled off his helmet and glanced down. “Phoenix Witch, Party, I wanted to hang out with Sand.” Kobra said grudgingly.

“Ya shoulda said so.” Party winked. “You know where I’ll be.”

Kobra grunted and turned away. He took his bike down to the track, into his stall he claimed for himself, when he first became a Motorbaby. Surprisingly, you didn’t have to worry much about sabotage, unless some really nasty asshole was racing that day, which Kobra had checked the roster, and that was a hard no.

“Bettin’ on ya!” a ‘Joy called out, and Kobra half waved in response.

Betting wasn’t really betting. You bet the amount of carbons you wanted. Half went between the people around you, like normal betting, half went to the racers, which was how they made their carbons. On one hand it was great, the better you got, the more people were willing to bet on you. The downside was a single bad race, a single crash could throw you back to the bottom, and you had to pay back a quarter of what everyone bet on you. When you’re good, a quarter is a lot of carbons.

“Kobra!” Sand waved him over to where a group of racers were standing in a circle, holding coveted cans of Monster, and chatting about the race to come.

“Hi Sand.” Kobra said quietly.

“Damn. I have got a feeling in my bones, this race is going to be a good race.” Sandman grinned, and leaned against the wall.

Kobra nodded, even though he was only half feeling it. He was excited to race, of course, but Party never had the greatest attitude toward his racing. Maybe he was right. Wouldn’t stop Kobra.

“Hey y’all Motorbabies, we got five minutes til race time so get your asses on the track and get ready to eat shit!” Some Race Runner was yelling up and down the lounges.

Kobra smiled wanly, and walked back to his stall, checking his bike for problems. Trust, but verify.

Slowly, he made his way to the starting line, and pulled on his helmet.

The hum of his bike settled him, and the anxiety he felt about the race turned into excited apprehension.

“Three!” Kobra tightened his grip on his handles. “Two!” He licked his lips and tensed. This was so familiar. He knew this. Understood it. Lived it. “One!” Kobra shot forward, throwing himself to the inside and causing four or five racers to skid and swerve. It was a dangerous move, and Kobra was oh-so good at it. It made him giddy, the feeling of racing against other people. He loved racing, even against Sandman. And he loved racing with Sandman.

Speaking of the Motorbaby, Sand pulled up just behind him, having just cut off another racer, who had barely recovered from her skidding swerve enough to stay upright.

Kobra grinned, and poured on speed, pulling ahead of Sand and the others. This race was almost ten miles long, and would take almost five minutes. Kobra glanced around in a half-second, relishing the blurred gold and brown of the Crash Track.

There was a roaring behind him, a massive jolt threw him off balance, and he was flying.

Everything happened slowly, and he heard Sand yell “are you fucking suicidal!?” And when he noticed what was happening, his scream of Kobra’s name, carried away by the wind. Then he hit the ground, and his bike landed on one of his legs, and searing pain burned into his whole body. After a moment, Kobra tried and failed at pushing the bike off him, only succeeding in moving it further down his leg as he tried to stand. He dropped back into the sand, and the last thing he remembered was that thought he had, right before the race. What if Party’s right?

Party watched as the first bike crossed the finish line. First Sandman, to a round of enthusiastic cheers and shouts. The someone he recognized, but didn’t know the name of.

Ghoul voiced his thoughts. “Where’s Kobra?”

“Maybe something happened with his bike and he’s coming soon.” Party said, his voice shaking. But the race ended, and there was still no Kobra. Sandman sprinted up to Party, face worried.

“No.” Party said. “No no no.”

Sand looked at him with an apologetic expression. “It’s Kobra. Some dumb fuck tried to get past him an’ me an’ flipped him off the track. I woulda stopped but if I tried Ida ended up right next to him.”

Party’s breath caught in his throat and Ghoul saw him pale.

“Where?” Party’s voice cracked.

“Roundabouts mile three.”

“Whose the asshole?” Ghoul asked, but Party was already gone. Party shoved past the race runners, who tried to stop him from running onto the track, and he punched one out before the other backed off.

The breath in his chest was burning by mile two, and the third mile passed far too slowly for his liking.

Finally he saw a mangled bike, and someone lying underneath it. Party sprinted the last twenty feet, and made sure Kobra wasn’t caught in the bike before shoving it away. “Hey,” he said softly, choking on a salty lump in his throat. Three people came up to him, slowly, as if worried by what he’d do.

“As soon as Sandman reported what happened we got down here and tried to help him. We left him there cause we didn’t wanna hurt him further.”

Party heard them, but didn’t acknowledge their existence. “C’mon, Kobra.” He muttered. Party didn’t shake him, scared it would hurt him. “C’mon, Kobes, I told you this was a bad idea!” Party shouted. That wasn’t true, Party had never told him that about something he loved so much. “I told you, and now look at us! Kobra, wake up! Wake up, goddammit!” He was practically screaming now, his voice hoarse, and the people around him unsure of what to do. Party looked up angrily. “Radio!” he snapped.

Someone put a radio in his hand, and he tuned into Ghoul’s frequency, one of the only people he knew that carried a personal radio, something he and the Missile had been working on.

“What do you want.” Ghoul’s voice answered.

“I-I need Jet down here. Right now. Keep Missile with Sand or someone up there, she shouldn’t see—“ Party broke off.

“You got it, Crash Queen.”

“We have medics.”

“Then get them down here!” Party snapped. Kobra looked like he shouldn’t have survived the crash, with his arms twisted at horrifying angles, one of his wrists swollen black and blue. One of his jeans legs was burned away from the heat of his motorcycle, and the skin was red and shiny from the burn. It looked like his bike cut him across the chest, and there was blood blooming on his shirt. “Please wake up, Kobra. Please, please.” After a moment, Party shook his head. “This is taking to long.” Party moved to pick up Kobra, ready to take him back to the starting line.

“You shouldn’t do that, you could hurt him further!” Someone protested, but Party shrugged them off.

“If I don’t, he’ll die from heat stroke, so shut up.”

Kobra was heavy, and about an inch taller than Party, so carrying him was a bit awkward. “C’mon Kobra, just a little further.” Kobra’s blood smeared on Party’s jacket, contrasting violently with the blue leather. Party heard him take a shuddering breath, the deepest one so far, and he relaxed, just slightly.

It took him and hour to get back, with Kobra’s added weight, and the three Race Runners following him up the track, offering to take his weight for a bit. Party snapped a no at them each time.

“Kobra!” Party heard Sandman yell across the lounges. Ghoul ran up with him, with noticeably bloody knuckles. “Please tell me he’s alright.” Sand said.

“Where’s Jet.” Party said shortly.

Ghoul jerked his head behind him, and Jet ran up. “Missile’s hanging with a couple other kids who came to watch the race... Ghoul, you didn’t tell me it was Kobra.” Jet’s voice shook. “Put him down.” After a second, he continued. “He broke his wrist, and a couple ribs, and his leg’s burned real bad. When he wakes up he’s gonna have a nasty concussion, and’ll be out of it for a while, but he’ll survive, thank the Witch.”

Kobra groaned and slowly blinked his eyes open, glassily staring at the four ‘Joys crowded around him.

“Wha’ ha’end?” Kobra slurred quietly. Party turned away as Sand started explaining.

Party’s torn mind churned over a paradox. On one hand, if this happened again, and Party wasn’t there, what would happen to Kobra? On the other, Party wasn’t sure he wanted to know until it was over, one way or another.

One thing he knew for sure was he never wanted to be at this track again.

#danger days the true live of the fabulous killjoys #kobra kid #party poison #jet star #fun ghoul #headcanon #i'm so sorry for my existence #Crash Track #why did i write this #this is literally the worst #why do i do this to myself #i apologize for my inconvenience #tw blood #tw injury #i don't think this is how tags work #1659 words #1000+ words #here goes nothing

5 notes · View notes

bonbonswirl-blog · 6 years

Text

Safe (a little sequel to "impressive"?)

NONE OF THE CHARACTERS BELONG TO ME THEY ALL BELONG TO @BRUEKLYNN ONLY I OWN NOTHING.

U dont really have to read "impressive", but you may get really confused about what are the characters talking about here and wat happend bc the idea is like lil sequel to that fanfic. Something before we get to some action fanfic guys! also sorry bc one of the characters is a little OOC here (or maybe even both!) enjoy if you can lol.

Its been two hours since rob was searching for jim to ask him for his opinion about the new script he wrote for the new jokey episode. The proplem is, he cant find the stuttery storyboarder anywhere in sight! He looked in many rooms, He asked a lot of people if they saw him, with only samuel replying to him that jim was running away strangely like he was in a hurry, before telling rob to leave his office. Rob didnt really understand why would jim run that quickly like this in the studio, he was always so cautious about every little action he takes, espicially with the 'dangerous' things to him, running in the studio is an example, he knows that jim would tell him that doing this have many bad outlooks. like, he may fall and break his bones! Or have a few scars on his face! Or maybe fall hardly to the point that the ground break down under him and fall to the second floor beneath! Thinking like that was a little funny to rob, he never met someone before with the same thinking method. But presently he was tring to give jim some excuses for running like he did, what if he maybe had a meeting that he was late for? or he forgot to do something important in his job? or he was alerted about something and wanted to tell everyone? Rob wont know the exact reason, but he hopes that jim had done whatever he needed to do and right know, Rob needs to find him to finish this script review before the night come, he was already too tired of searching for jim. It may be weird to think that someone would hide all day in one of the studio room until the night, but everyone told rob that jim was noticed to be absent from the view since hours. With no sign that he went out of the place, the only option left is that jim locked himself in one of the studio rooms, which is the last option Rob wanted to consider since the studio is reeaally big and have many many rooms there....

Rob was already exusted greetly, his legs in pain, He looked in every studio room out there, expect for five ones, and good thing for him those are the last five. Whats even better? they are all in the same hall. Finally! Jim must be in one of those five, and all what he have to do is open and close the doors. those rooms seem to be some kind of store rooms in the studio, with each one having random things stored inside it.

Rob walked to the first room in the right and opened it, wishing jim is already there. But he saw nothing but some music instruments, he closed the door and went to the second room in the left, opening the door, finding just a bunch of papers everywhere, closing the door in dissapointment again, this is really boring and he is tired and want to end this work now. He went to the third room in the right, he was about to open it but....suddenly before he do...he heard a voice...a very low and odd voice.....but the hall he is in was so quiet that the odd voice was the only thing that could be heard, other than rob own footsteps. It was a very unclear and inditinct sound...it looked like it was coming from behind him, which was the forth door in the left, that is right behind him. It must be for jim right? Who else could it be for? Jim is the only one who must have locked himself in that room. When rob moved softly near to where the audio is coming from, the voice started to become a little more clear, but when rob drew his head near that door he tried to figure about what this voice is saying or who is he talking with. but he couldnt understand a word, perhaps those are not words and this is..........is this sobbing?....no.....he hoped that this is not what he is thinking about right now........he was really very worried about what is happening inside.........he even forgot about his whole purpose when he was searching for jim and just wanted to check if he is alright there.....he slowly moved the door handle and moved it down to open that door only to be greeted by..........

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"AHHHHHH!!!!!"

Jim screamed in fear and jumped so high when rob opened the door, breathing so heavily and hardly! on the other hand, rob screamed when jim did out of that sudden move, he just jumped a few steps to the back, he did it! he found jim! But before he utter any word he saw jim and..........he was highly startled by what he saw........jim face........all of it was......so ruddy......even his freckles were very hard to be noted under all of this redness..... his eyes...so puffy....so dark.... so swollen.....so dry......dry because all of the tears inside were used....the traits of the endless river of those salty drops that streamed down his tight face were etched on it as if he had been crying since forever....even some drops were still falling from his chin....his face was wet, on every inch of it......his shirt and hands even drenched....

".........Jim!............." " r-r-rob!.....I-I-I!..........I-I.....I....." jim whole body was trembling....he couldnt bring himself to say something.....how can he explain now? he looked like if he is trying to hold himself up strong...but he just..... gave up....collapsing on his knees, looking at the ground woefully. Rob was dolorous to the scene in front of him...he never thought that one day he will see something like that happen to one of the dearest people to him...... he tried with tender steps to approach his quivering friend, when he did.....he sat on his knees too, very placidly putting his hands on jim fallen face to make him look at him....but looking at jim crying face only made his heart sink....sink deep to places he never knew where there...it seemes that rob had a spot for his friend. That was a horrid thing that rob didnt want to witness again, Or jim...That cordial gloss that favoured jim eyes was no longer there... The look in them were so lonesome. The glint they had that revealed a world of darkness, his eyes revealed it all. The dark, colourless eyes that mourned his despair....rob gloomily moved his hand gently up and down his soulmate wet cheek, as if telling him that he will be ok, everything is alright now, he gave him one last sad look before starting to talk.

" ...What happend?..... " jim eyes went to the ground, the muscles of his chin tremble like a small child, despite the consolation feelings from his friend warm soft hands on his tensed face, he couldnt bring himself to speak of what happened, what if this ilwas a stupid reason to cry or to be afraid of? Rob waited for an answer, but it never came, he could sense that jim still have some doubt and terror inside him. Rob closed his eyes with a sigh, pressing his hands on jim face to make him focus on his once more "....jim....you are a very dear friend to me....my best friend...my soulmate....I really feel so worried about you...know that whatever happend...im here with you...I will always support and be next to you in whatever goes....I cant be fine when I see you like this...you can tell me anything you want to..I promise that I wont tell anyone...and will help you in whatever you need...please let me be a shoulder to you..and let me understand whatever bother you...." jim was....moved by what he just heard...that reminded him of how much lucky he is to have someone in his life like Rob, oh how much he loved being with him. He forced his desperate neck to look in the eyes of his understanding soulmate, he wanted so bad to be able to start narrating the story.

" R-Rob...can I tell you s-something?...." " ofcourse! You can tell me anything! " ".....I....sometimes rob....I....really w-wish that...I had a...n-normal childhood like all t-the other people...." he paused for a few seconds because that was something he wasnt certain he should talk about, rob looked at him with a confused face. " you s-see.....I-I just wished t-to run around in an o-o-open feild after butterflies like everyone...p-play in those small playgrounds in the b-backyards...d-draw with those colorful watercolor p-paints without being s-so scared to touch them...I-I-I just w-wish I was given t-the opportunity to try new things l-like all the others, without my freedom b-being held back by 'them'....if I j-just had a better people that could h-help me grow u-up...Insted Of Having A M-M-Man That Always Make Me Scream In Fright E-Every Moment He Comes home! A-And Cry Myself To S-Sleep!..." jim didnt know if he felt better or not after admitting everything...rob listened to him with every detail...he understands it all now... ".......jim.....I....Im sorry.....I-I understand you had a troubled family...but its alright...you are away from them now...you are here with us...that 'man' was all just a bad memory from the past..." ".......no.......worse......he wasnt j-just a memory... h-he was here.....h-here in the studio....h-he was trying to get me....a-again...pull me back to h-his drakness...He a-almost catched me...but t-thanks the gods samuel w-was there to save me..." rob got confused again, he thought jim was talking about his bad childhood, but it was more. He stopped. He gets what really happened now. Linking together what jim and samuel told him, he connected all the puzzle pieces together now. Jim father was here in the studio hours ago, jim saw him and fled away quickly, with samuel saving him in the last moment before being captured. Jim looked at rob, looking broken " r-r-rob!....I-I-I cant let him s-see me again...I-If he had me in his hands one more time....h-he.....h-h-h-h-h-h-h-he......" that last part was choppy as if jim tongue got tangled, his body shivering again, looking down in sorrow

" Jim "

The shy storyboarder, shakingly looked up hearing his name being called, his eyes started having a tenuous layer of water over them. Rob didnt speak a word. Insted, He opened his arms, as if telling his friend to come over here, rest his head on his shoulders, lay on him, and let it all out....jim understood it, he was taken aback by rob sudden genial offer, but he accepted it, crawling to him, then wrapping his shuddered lanky arms around his friend, resting his lumbering head on his best friend strong chest, feeling his mild heartbeats. Hearing it reminded jim of the nice and tenderness waves he feels when he is with rob. Who just closed his eyes and toke him in a sympathetic embrace.

Without hisetance, The tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down his face, unceasingly, hands clutching at his holder back, who held him in silence. Perhaps these tears will help wash the blood out. He pressed his head against his friend chest, hoping that those heartbeats will soothe him down just like the patting in his back do. There is a static in his head once more, the side effect of this constant fear, constant stress he lives with. He hears his own sounds, like a distressed child, raw from the inside. It takes something out of him he didnt know he had left to give. That's the way it is when people are hard. It's like a theft of the spirit, an injury no other person can see. Rob held him in silence, rocking him slowly as the tears soaked his chest, a tiny lapse let jim pull away, blinking lashes heavy with tears, before he collapse again, his howls of misery worsening. The pain must have come in waves, minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for recovering breaths, before hurling him back into the outstretched arms of his grief.

" Shhhhhhhh.....Shhhhhh.....its alright jim.....you are here with me....in my arms you will be safe.....you are safe now.....you are safe...."

Just a few more minutes and jim was done, he now really feels better, he feela.....safe....a feeling he didnt encounter for such a long time ago, in Rob arms all his troubles have been washed away, how much can he be thankful to have him here with him? He lift his head after that break down to look at the script writer in gratitude, trying to find the right words to say, But before he do rob placed his hands on jim shoulders, making jim back stright, rob stared for momebt into his eyes.

" Now I want you to take a breathe and, inhale.....exhale....inhale....exhale" jim was taking deep breathes after rob. feeling the remaining weigh of stress go away.

" Now I want you to repeat after me..... My name is jim gooder. " " M-My name is j-jim gooder....." " I am a talented storyboarder. " "I-I am a t-talented storyboarder......" " and I have many friends who are by my side." " a-and I have m-many friends who are by m-my side....." jim stopped for a moment, he felt that he was a new person now, like he was reborn again. While rob gave him a friendly smile, feeling so happy for his dear soulmate recovery.

#brueklynn #jim gooder #rob searchman

3 notes · View notes

exvee · 7 years

Quote

today i was voluntold to participate in a COMBAT LIFE SAVER coarse.. in the event of a emergency i am qualified to save someones life... its from 0900- UTC... i go the good news(sarcasm), last night at 2000... I then announced i would draw anything for anyone on just about everything IF they take my place in the class.. ...well not everyone raised their hand at once. salty faced, they asked me why dont i want to go? "because in the morning i talk to my girlfriend... i would rather talk to her then be with more dudes.." didnt make a difference... I sat there for a bit watching wonder years day dreaming until i got up and went to the back.. didnt bother to shower.. i undressed and sent you a text letting you know im in bed, hoping your up to talk or w.e i then check my fb and twitter like theres anything to check or anyone sent me a msg at all.. i just really check to see your thoughts or what your doing. i then nvm it all when i see an update, deep sigh and wait till netflix to load up twilight zone... watch it for a bit, i got it minimized and your msgr up just incase you text me i would see it... i fall asleep. the time was 1040 i dreamt about my grandmother last night.. a sudden wake up to thinking it was 2 am, realizing i was only asleep for a hour.. i move the mouse to turn the screen on, checking if you texted me yet.. i call, text... w.e we had our argument.. i fall asleep not feeling any better. its 130 in the am.. waking up at 6, move the mouse to see if you texted me... and i just lay there staring at the ceiling, "man i dont want to get out of bed today.." i close my eyes forcin myself to sleep, alot of "what ifs" going through my mind, i cant help but be awake. laying there, okay ****... its 7 now, lets just get out of bed, shower... put on a new uniform and start a healthy day.. be strong, its okay.. she'll text you when she misses you, give her time.. she will miss you; it will be okay.. just get up. i cant help but touch the mouse pad and turn the screen back on.. damnit... why did i do that? i look through your pictures saved, every one of them.. i try to touch myself maybe i just need to have sex, im sexual frustrated... didnt even work. fuck it, fuck this desert. rolling out of bed at 730.. i go shower... i must of been in the shower for an hr i thought, letting the water run... it was only 20 mins.. i shave, brush my teeth, comb my hair and go back to the room.. place the soaps and towel away, rub the mouse pad to check.. then get ready... iv had this one acu uniform which fits me just right, gives me the perfect slim shape; not to baggy.. its pressed and everything is new on it, i was saving it for leave in october when i go home in uniform i looked decent, trying to impress you i guess. im not going home in october, so i say wht the heck.. i need something to boost my moral. i look in the mirror, my eyes look a mess... like iv havnt been getting rest and stress... dark shadowed eyes. real heavy. i brush the hair out my face and go on my way. jesus comes in and says hey you going to chow? lets go, i grab my weapon and go. the walk to the chow i hall, i keep my head down as i walk; just so the same i see the same thing every day, take the same path, walk the same way.. see the same people.. give me id to the same guard, nod my head to him as a thank you for letting me in then walk through the same white double doors. the red tile, theres exactly 75 red tiles from the door to the sink where i wash hands, the same soap, it smells like hash i think to myself.. i smell my hands, smells like i just smoked bud take my plate and tray, i tell the iraqi 3 times for 3 boiled eggs.. i get 3 water melon slices and some yogurt.. jesus grabs the same thing but he replaces the watermelon for an apple. man i wish i grabbed an apple i say to myself before i sit down.. we sit there, and eat.. i just day dream as i eat, quietly just listening to jesus and his friend miguel talk, miguel tells me man from the looks of your plate, thats how you stay so skinny.. he was eating a greasy omelet and hash browns... i just look at his plate and nod and continue to peel off my boiled eggs and remove the dry yolk.. looking around at everyone, 5 tables away, i see a group of officers sitting together, there were 3 females and 4 males... sitting there, stuffing their face and laughing among eachother. i look in discus, i them mutter i fucking hate officers.. i see the females and i just get so much anger, i call them a fucking bitch in my head.. jesus says, hey are you okay? yeah im just tired. jesus states his conversation, man im so sick and tired of hearing about cheating spouses, it seems like thats the fling now and days.. wives cheating on husbands, husbands cheating on wives.. girlfriends fucking this person boyfriends fucking this person.. im tired of that shit, if your going to mess around and play the game then be single why waste someones time? noone is more professional than I, he chants as a joke of the creed we recite... i just stare at his mouth as he talks... then his nose, then his had gestures... what the fuck are you talking about jesus i say in my head. the voice in my head is very calm soft spoken toned voice. i eat the eggs, the yogurt and nvmed the watermelon, it was hard and to cold for my liking, we leave. walk back together, silent. same path, same things to see.... desert. jesus pulls out a red apple and bites it.. i look the apple in his hand, man i wish i got a apple i say again in my head. we get back to the shop... i put my weapon in the rack, the same empty spot on the rack i plce my dirty weapon i care so less about, "im never going to use it" i say out loud to my self... and walk to the back of the office. agnew is sitting there on his ipad, drew is sitting there with a flash light pretending its a gun as he shoots me john is on the computer looking at cars and says hey ese, im sorry i unplugged your ipod from the charger to charge mine.. i just stare at everyone with a blank look like dude, idc about none of yall.. i just nod my head as a morning greeting and back to the front i sit on the floor against the wall waiting to go to this CLS class... jesus is coming with me so it might not be all that bad. its 850 by then, he ask if im ready to go down to the Aid station, i tell him hold on. i need to grab something.. when really i just wanted to see if you wrote me back yet.. saying in my head, your so pathetic eric. running to the back just to see if she wrote you, disappointed.. were suppose to let her text us; my mind is talking but my body keeps on moving in disregards to the commands my mind is speaking out. i rub the mouse pad, nothing yet... damn, let me call... no answer... jesus comes, hey man are you ready?.. umm yeeeah, lets go.. i close the laptop as to signify thats it eric, stay off your laptop all day and leave her alone.. i grab my stuff and go. we get there, we sit.. he asks whats wrong, i say nothing.. he ask how we are doing i say good, he ask have i talked to eric i say yes, last night.. he ask hows he doing i say good.... he shuts up, from the tone of my voice he gets the drift.. i dont feel like talking.. he offers a cigarette, i decline and drink my water. the instructor comes out and takes our names down, theres 5 of us... 2 guys from A co. idk 1 guy named collier from Eco. i went to military school with then me and jesus from HHC co.. the instructor, SGT Anol... says well the class was not suppose to be till tomorrow so just com back tomorrow at 0900 in front of this door.. roger, SGT; walking back jesus says hes going to bed... not telling anyone we got released early... so i do the same.. i dont feel like being at work any way.. walk to the back, open the laptop... touch mouse pad.. i check twitter then fb to see if your awake.. so frustrated, i just activate my old fb, i need to talk to scuba or end or my family i say to myself.. i change my profile picture, click on your profile to see if your up again, sigh> i deactivate it again, pointless.. i dont want to talk to anymore... but her i think to myself. i go on twitter, i wonder who ****** was, so i checked his profile out to see if i knew him.. i notice his name lingers around so i just check. i see some photos.. i do recognize him from school.. he got fat from the face i tell myself.. he's ugly... w.e, brittany wont leave me for this guy.. what ifs then come along.. i just exit out and sit out on the pouch for a bit.. i come back in, sit in the same chair.. touch the mouse pad... still no msg.. i then call, then text you whatever comes to mind, i then start to email you my day, a vent of thoughts and actions of my boring dumb life.. you finally msg me..

#tbt

0 notes

survivorpacificislandallstars · 7 years

Text

Ep. 12 - “Fly my ass back to Hawaii and dump me in a volcano” - Andrew (Pt. 1)

So I guess All Stars is just gonna be me watching the people I know and love go home one after the other at this point. At this point, I shouldn't be shocked or mad. Rhea, Karen, even Brandon to an extent. Who's next is my only question. Shockingly, to not my surprise, Jordan and Ash couldn't be trusted!!!! Who could have foreseen this? Well, I could, and I did. Anyone with common sense and a brain could have, but I guess that's too much to ask. Like with Ash, I had zero expectations. Jordan... I mean, there was at least a low bar, a very low bar. Because as far as I can recall, I've been completely honest with Jordan each tribal I've been with him... And yet each time he goes against his own word, then we make up afterward, and it's just... I don't even know. I'm totally numb to betrayal by now. Also Gage's vote is hilarious. "I don't take kindly to lies" wow bitch me too the fuck???? Kinda why I voted for him cause like, at every tribal all my interactions with him have been lies built upon lies, sometimes mutually and sometimes from him. But there's no actual trust and we've just been pretending every round, so I'm glad we've finally dropped it and we can acknowledge the tension. Jordan said I'm not on the bottom of the tribe...which sounds fake but, okay. Maybe I can work with him, maybe I can't, but really I'm just praying for once that we swap one last time to save my ass.

I am so so so so shook right now.

Conf #18: wow! final 14! Im doing so much better than the other two games that i wont talk about. Im concerned about this immunity challenge because usually when it comes to touchy subjects I feel like I know how the game is going, but with all the swaps I feel like I know nothing about what people are thinking it concerns me. *Coco Peru voice* that bothers me. As far as the double tribal? *Yawn* but also im ready to die again, hopefully I can get people to go after mitch!!!

Honestly this tribe swap has me wet. I'm on a tribe with a bunch of icons like daddy Andrew or Sam B or fake Sam, even Steffen to an extent. More importantly I am away from that horrible nest of snakes from my previous tribe. The bad thing is Samantha wants to go after Jay, because Jay tried coming for Sam at some point, which is horrible. And if I had to choose right now I'd vote out Jay over Sam just because Sam unlike some people hasn't blindsided me!!! But no I'm not bitter or anything, why would I be bitter? I mean I shouldn't be because it's not like I considered those people trustworthy or anything!!! Anyway. Mitch is obviously siding with Jay, which leaves three people in the middle. Sam and I both want Andrew because he's trustworthy (and Sam also wants him because he's hot and I have no issues with that). I trusted Andrew the most at the very beginning of the game, and we've both been through a lot but hopefully that connection is still there. That leaves Steffen and fake Sam as the swing votes...... Idk how much I trust either of them. Steffen did side with me at the Chrissa tribal, Sam sided with the snakes at Brandon's tribal tho.... So yikes!!!! We'll figure that out tomorrow!!!

OKAY. So this new Kyaal tribe? EW. ALL MY FRIENDS ARE ON THE OTHER TRIBE AND I MISS THEM OKAY? NOT REALLY THO. I'm so chaotic in here wtf. Anyway, SO I'm back with Jordan Pines, which is litty titty. I feel like I actually can trust him because he gives me A LOT of tea like all the time. Whether or not it's all factual is another story, but at this point I'll take what I can get. I'm also still with DADvid. He's my Dad, check my birth certificate. He is such a good person and I'm so happy we've gotten so close through this game because we have had a lot of time to get to know one another in various communities and never have. So David told me he is pretty sure of a Drew/Jay/Mitch thing thang going on and I believe it! Drew just had a moment in the HOS15 VL when Jay was evicted so that's confirmed. ADDITIONALLY, Jordan just told me that Mitch found an idol (which isn't surprising) some ruby idol bullshit that makes everyone go to rocks??? Apparently Drew has it right now and knowing my luck I'll be rocked out of this damn game. But hey, I keep saying this but I'm so proud of myself for making it this far, so if I go, I go! (I'LL BE FUCKING PISSED AND PROBABLY NEVER PLAY ONE OF THES AGAIN IF I FUCKING GO HOME, I AM FUCKING SANDRA DIAZ-TWINE AND I WILL BE THE QUEEN THAT WEARS THE CROWN TWICE.)

So who the fuck does Jay think he is exiling me?! Why me?! Clearly he has some plan to get rid of me because we're not working together so he isn't exiling me to get the clue or anything so obviously he wants me gone. If for some reason he DOESN'T want me gone he's crazy because now I'm just pissed off. I don't get to just waltz back into the tribe with immunity like Drew does. I'm gunna have to scramble and make sure it's not me and this is gunna be so annoying. Plus he just messaged me "I'm exiling you I hope that's ok" LIKE NO ITS NOT FUCKING OKAY YOU DIMWIT FUCK WHY THE FUCK DID HE CHOOSE ME??? Also I just looked at the touchy subjects results and I got who has the most F2 deals? Technically I have none because I haven't actually talked to anyone about going to the end together AND I really only talk to Steffen, Drew, and Jordan so like fuck I'm so mad because it looks so bad on me. I'm just really overall pissed off right now and I can't believe I can't even rant to anyone! I feel like Drew and Jay are tight. I started going off not even thinking of it as a game thing but more like I'm frustrated and want to rant to a friend about it but then I remembered back on the first tribe when Jay, Drew, and Mitch were all so far up each other's ass it was disgusting so like I can't even talk to Drew about it because he'll go run and tell Jay and be all fucking annoying. I just want Mitch and Jay gone so bad. Steffen better be able to pull some people in and make sure it's Mitch and not me. If I go home because Steffen can't strategize to save me I'm gunna suffocate him when he comes to visit

I'm back and alive A lot of things have happened, and apparently confessionals aren't mandatory, so I haven't been writing things! That's great. So the last time I wrote a confessional was the round before Billy right? Ok So I sort of kind of may have manipulated the vote against Billy. I heard from Van that her and Billy were trying to flip the vote onto Charlotte, so I told Charlotte that Billy might have been trying to target her, and she easily flipped to Van and I. Jay didn't want to vote Billy, so it was 3-2. I'm glad I got him out of the game at least. I love Billy as a person, as a player, whew. He reamed me afterwards, and every bad thing he said about me was truly well-deserved. So then we swap, fun shit. Expected. We played Kanto! I got gay pokemon, but no idol or whatever. I have a team of cuties, so that's all that matters to me.<3 I couldn't play the grass game, so we kinda had to go to tribal. David was the target, but he whipped out an idol and his one vote for Punpun sent them home, which is disappointing. But fuck, good job David. Props to you, I ain't even mad. Apparently Van was voted out of the other tribe which SUCKS because I had to vote out Billy to protect her and then she just went home anyway??? Uggggh My friends keep leaving. We stayed in Kanto for a week and I got to play Pokemon LeafGreen. I caught 111 pokemon and earned myself a trip to exile, which was mostly pointless, and our tribe got immunity. I wasn't even playing to win, I just really love FR/LG. But of course I'm secretly digging my own grave, because who wants to keep a tryhard around at/before merge??? No one. I gave my idol to Drew because he said he might've been in trouble. It was insurance in case things turned sour. BUT APPARENTLY AT THEIR TRIBAL IT WAS UNANIMOUS VOTE FOR CHARLOTTE. I love Charlotte... She was my #1 man. I wanted to help her get far. And then Drew told me she might've been a catfish. So... Maybe that was for the best, idk. COME TO THINK OF IT, a first boot being considered an all star is VERY suspicious... I want my idol back tho. Also Karen went home at the other tribal!!! Bless up. Jay told me she had a sapphire idol so that is... good that she's gone. ALSO Dan has the Whetu idol and I'm surprised but also not. So here we are on new tribes, and what better way to put a fire under my ass than to play touchy subjects??? Do I have good luck with this game? No. Do I usually get nice answers? Yes. Did I get them this time? Not...really. People think I have an idol and they want to vote me out next. Which is unfortunate, because now I honestly don't have an idol. And I'm going to be traveling tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I can't even really talk to people and defend myself!!!!!!!! Fortunately I at least have Jay and Andrew on this tribe. Sam G and Kevin would likely vote with me too. I don't want to vote Steffen because I just told him I wouldn't and meant it. So that leaves Sam B, who just won Panem and should go... We'll see how the chips fall. Maybe I'll get my idol back, maybe Samg and Kevin like me enough to keep me around, and maybe I'll live another day. If not, oh well, I made jury.

When you accidentally send a confessional....to the wrong game....hosted by Jay....and it's talking about Jay...and it reveals your allies........ I'm actually gonna hate myself if this fucks my game up why do I do these things

"Not to nitpick at the Touchy Subject results but the fuck! Firstable Ash and Gage put me down as backstabber like besides last vote which was just me returning the backstabbing to Gage, when have I done that... Second of balls, people forgetting I'm in the game? Well, not shocking, I'm naturally irrelevant. Still won't stop me from being salty but. So um if Jay goes after Sam B he's officially cancelled, because I would literally die for her every day of my life I had to. And the fact that he's immune....sigh. I don't know if he trusts me but!!! If he doesn't he can catch these gay 12 year old hands. Sam B and I want to go after fake Sam now because she has too many allies (she wanted to go after Mitch but uh, I think not). Idk what Jay thinks about fake Sam but he did send her to Exile so there's that. Hopefully Andrew and Steffen will come through???? Because if I have to watch Sam B die I might as well drop dead to the floor right now because there would be no point in living after that"

Andrew wants to form an alliance of me him Jay and Mitch. Like, I love those people, but you know who that excludes? Sam!!!!! You know who I would never vote out in a heartbeat? Also Sam!!!! Voting out Sam would be like Ciera voting out her mom except actually important and heartbreaking (but it would still be a hashtag game changing big move). So I kinda bs'd to Andrew saying I don't trust Jay because he voted out Karen (also my mom) which is half the truth. The good news is Andrew said we should choose between Steffen and fake Sam. While Steffen has backstabbed me once, we're supposedly friends now cause he was like "miss you!!!" when we swapped but like Gage did the same thing and look where that got me. But I don't wanna break that bond just yet. Sooooo I'm still gunning for fake Sam but Mitch was like "I like her" which just proves real Sam's about connections and yadda yadda. Really I just want to get to the point where I can stop distinguishing the Sam's and my life gets easier.

I’m me and sara planning to search the well together

So the vote should in theory be Ash tonight. I'm perfectly fine with Ash going home but I'm not perfectly fine with lying to Gage about it, but at this point unless Ash/Gage have an idol I don't foresee things changing. Thankfully Gage seems to like me so that is a plus. If there's an idol played it most likely will not be me going home. I don't love that it will be David going home though. Jordan Pines is a dear friend of mine, but he's just in general very aggressive. He has strong social ties to people and seems to utilize them when he needs things. He put together the 5 votes against Ash and it seems like a done deal. But I'm at a cross roads. Do I try to turn David and work with Gage and Ash to vote Jordan out? Idk. My concern is that endgame, people like Mitch/Drew/Jay/Jordan will be an unstoppable force in this game and idk if I'm ready for that. I'll probably touch base with David before my vote is submitted and if he thinks the plan is good, it's happening. If not, I'll just have to lie to Gage and possibly lose my newest ally's trust... :/

I. Hate. Survivor. Here I am, dealing with important stuff, cleaning literal dog shit, and then here in the game shit hits the fan. Sam B wanted Sam G out. Jay wanted Steffen out. Sam B was fine with this. I tell Jay this. I also tell Jay Sam B wants Sam G out, but we can roll with Steffen. Jay says cool. But somewhere after some shitty sequence of events, Jay goes apeshit and throws out like, everyone's names and wants to vote out Sam B???? And doesn't tell me of course, even though he wanted to make sure "we're cool." So I guess keeping me in the dark, again, is a good way to gain trust. And then an even shittier thing happens. Sam B, fake Sam, and Steffen unite to vote out Mitch. I think voting out Mitch is the most effective way to weaken Jay, and Jay does need to be weakened. But voting out Mitch...and sending him to the jury...is difficult. I would rather send Mitch to jury over Sam. Sam said Jay directed votes back to Steffen... But I can't trust him, and I don't want to sit still and do nothing about that. He's fooled me once and I don't want to be fooled again, I'm tired of that happening. Voting out friends is hard, but I think tonight there's no easy way out.

#piallstars #confessionals

0 notes