#and im like haha ! i truly wish ! i was not here doing accounting ! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

venusfun · 2 months

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🌸Appreciation post🌸

I know I know.. I'm not posting, I'm not that active on my blog, but I want to say a huge thank you to all of you, that made me forget all the shit that happens in my life.

These years when I was posting, creating astrology content, and all the games were so fucking amazing, and I'm grateful for my other friends, talented people on here that supported me talked to me, asked me questions. To be honest, I actually felt useful for the very first time.

So thank you all for the good vibes, support, and I hope you will all have just as much fun here as I had. And I'm so happy seeing new people here, following their dreams, sharing their knowledge.

There are some accounts that I would like to say a personalized thank you:

@notanastrologer ahhhh you are so amazing, I absolutely love love LOVE the knowledge you are sharing here, you're always helping people and I'm so sure that you will get very far in life, I still remember the first ask that I sent you about Mars in 6th house haha. I'm very grateful for you and for the opportunity to interact with you.

@1111jenx you always in my mind have been the astrology it girl, you are so inspirational. Your posts are very deep and well-made. Even though we exchanged a few messages, I felt very joyful when we did. I'm very glad that I came across your account because the things I have learned from you could be written in a book. You're so fabulous.

@d4rkpluto I am truly amazed by your knowledge. I admit that at first I was quite intimidated by truthfulness because I see people putting on a mask when on social media. You are always honest and I love it. And I'm very happy to see you still active, and going strong on here. I'm grateful that I had the chance to read your posts since the newcomer Pluto era.

@hillarysss My first astrology friend! You are such an incredible person, you made the start of my astrology era very fun, Im grateful for the chance I got to communicate with u here on messages and on Discord. I absolutely enjoyed every interaction, and I hope you're doing great!

@leolo404 where do I even start? Even though we parted ways because I became inactive for a long time, I still find myself thinking about how you're doing. I'm thankful for all of the support I got from you, and I hate myself for losing such incredible communication. I wish I had done a lot more for you.

@ellmeria I would say you are one of my recent astrology friends, but I can tell that you're one of the kindest and stunning people I have come across. You are so talented and I can tell that success will follow you always. You're so inspirational, and your blog is very beautiful and well-made.

@astroismypassion you have one of the most informative blogs I have ever seen. Your ability to analyze placements is outstanding, I have learned so much because of your astounding posts, and I'm happy that many people because of you are learning and discovering many things about themselves.

@danihodgs you are so so so positive.. ALWAYS. I literally adore it so much, and I always get a smile on my face when I see you posting about your days! Keep going, you are stunning!

There are so many accounts that I'm grateful of! I can't even name all of them. I'm also very thankful for all the people following me, and it makes me happy that some of you enjoyed the content I made.

I still remember when I hit 50 followers and I felt like the happiest human on earth. Now I'm soon to hit 7000 which is indescribable. And I adore and love every single one of you.

I really really want to keep posting but nowadays when I think of a unique or interesting post to make, I feel stuck, I can't really explain the feeling.

At least in August, I will try my best to be more active, to show support and share kindness.

A very truthful and genuine thank you.❤️

#venusfun #blogs #astro community

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callibones · 11 days

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uhhh hh ..... hello! this is the same anon who sent in that ask about object camps. the camps you suggested sound really interesting! im a little too scared to join them for now haha but they sound really cool. they will rotate in my mind for a while i think HGFDSFGHJGFDSDFGH other than that .. 1 . i came across the wiki camp two and it looked so creative and interesting to me! i dont program in css that often anymore but the site makes me wanna go over and put in a bunch of pages. problem is.. i don't know how to Apply? or Do Anything? rn the site is locked for voting but just in general i tried reading the rules but still couldn't understand how it worked. if you knew anything about it that'd be nice. it also seems to have a discord server..? again im scared to check myself but if youre in it i wanna know whether it's a nice space to be in.

2 . uhhghgfdghj i peered through the rest of the blog and found the shelled one blaseball fic you posted ? and i think im really Normal about it. So after reading that i now trust your fanfic opinions. are there any other blaseball fics you'd strongly recommend? and uh general.. uh, evil mind controlly fics would be really nice too (the book of bill is also sort of ruining me along with this so i am truly looking for ANYTHING and like omg hbdxszexrdcfdsxrctvdxszaf) and thats all i wanted to ask you! sorry this is getting REALLY LONG i wish you well and i am So Sorry for bothering you!

HELLO AGAIN! not botherin me at all. :-] i was hopin youd find that answer.... i made sure to answer it at the same time u sent the question so you'd have a MAXIMUM CHANCE of findin it, and u Did! so Yay! welcome back. im going to tag my answers to your Post's with 🩸🟪 so we Never Get Separated Again. but i want you to know.... i don't bite! i literally can't on account of my face is a monitor. so if you wanna chat, feel free to dm me! you seem like a really fun person and we clearly have a lotta interest's in common so Consider That: An Option.

ANYHOO.

1) the wiki camp 2 is ABSOLUTELY a welcoming community. in fact, check this out: here's an index of plainly written explanations of various community in-jokes, to ensure nobody's left confused! while i'm not super active on the discord due to hyperfixating on single spaces at a time like some sort of cryptid, i have a lot of wonderful friends in the community and i'd wholeheartedly call it nice.

you don't have to apply to write, either! while i don't think there's an ETA yet on when the wiki's re-opening, whenever it does you'll be able to make an account for free and start creating to your heart's content! sometimes people who do that even get roped into the camp due to Token Shenanigans....

2) look. i get it. how much do i get it? the post you're talking about was written by my bill cipher fictive. and guess what book made me pick THAT thing up? we're in the same boat. i'm (RELATIVELY) normal 'round these parts, but if you do end up dropping me a line, maybe you'll happen upon some of my stuff? just sayin'. but as for what i can do for ya at the desk here...

thing is, i actually haven't read that much blaseball fanfic. i know! i WANT to. i have a list, which i'll reblog with your special tag right after this. but my brain doesn't let me read a lotta long stuff these days, which is SUCKS! i might poke around some tags and see what i can find, but that spectacular shelled one fic's the only one of its kind i know.

if you wanna read something Long and Serious and Really Really Good that's haunted me for years, put your eyes on Oil and Water, the shoe thieves disaster marriage classic about grief and autism and family and other such things.

then read everything else that catches your fancy, and send me your picks! and hey. if anyone reading this wants to help a cute anon out and knows some fics (or wrote some fics) that fit the Bill i mean the bill, PLEASE lemme know!! i Understand wanting more evil mind control. it's kind of my whole thing. PLUS i'm literally the shelled one's favorite

#callie.txt.exe #blaseball #🩸🟪

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bysaber · 9 months

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ummmm HIYAAAAA, is this SABER??? im jkkk , im so loving the new theme, im like vibing with it so hard you have no idea. the colours really compliment each other. im like so so so so sorry I haven't been in touch, I had so many ASSignments to do that my screen time became a mere hour and that was like catching up with my family. but lemme just say I just read/reread every single ficmas post today and mmmmh with a little cup of tea ( I kept going back for more bc your fics are so comfy to me) by my side it totally soothed me. and I just wanna say if anyones disappointed in you for dropping something that made you feel stressed and anxious , TRUST!!! , they can come fight me anytime of the day bc im DOWNNN. im so happy and honestly proud of the 15 days you accomplished because when I say that they were all beautifully written like , im NOT LYING and I could never, I have so many ideas in my head but honestly scared to even write a single paragraph and publish it bc I am my own biggest hater and critic. anyways I don't mean to put the spotlight on me but rather show you that im not just saying this for the sake of saying but I truly do mean it. Also Im not really accustomed to work without holiday since I haven't begun working yet but isn't Christmas like a worldwide holiday, and they still didn't give you a holiday???

also I just realised I never really introduced myself, i have like this thing where I never interact with my blog because it doesn't have much reblogs or works bc im like one of those kids who got introduced to the concept of the internet at like their late teen years so it took me a while to figure out how this app works or any app for that matter (yeah so like opposite of an iPad baby, we exist! ) so I think ppl might find me suspicious.. idk there's something wrong with the way I think haha.

but I totally would LOVVEEE to be mutuals with you, if you'd like the same.

this must be so much to read, sorry I went a lil overboard but yeah all in all, cant wait for all of your future upcoming pics which I know will blow my mind again and again and again. ( also I don't want this to seem like im putting pressure on you to release fics faster GOD NO, I just mean like I could wait an eternity if it means I could read your work!)

so wish you the ultimate best, saber, I hope everything is well in your life both personal and work and if not, I hope it all turns out to be fine and all in your favour. >>>>>3333

HIYAAA BOO <3

First of all, you don't need to apologize for disappearing! Life is a pain in the ass sometimes and we can't dive into our fantasy world (tumblr), I TOTALLY GET IT!!! But I hope everything worked out for you and that now you have time to enjoy some free time!!!

(more under the cut)

My old theme was getting on my NERVES, I wasn't satisfied (hehe) with it but I'm really happy with this one. And I brought the true Saber to life. I'm glad you liked it <3 it'll probably stick around.

IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY THAT MY FICS MAKE YOU FEEL THIS WAY!!!!!! It's enough to make me want to keep writing because knowing one person appreciates what I write already makes everything worth it. I would LOVE to know who you are and become mutuals, and it's fine if your blog isn't filled with things.

At some point, I also was a "ghost" tumblr user.

Like, for years.

I guess I've been here since the SuperWhoLock era but only started interacting in the past three years -- then decided to create a new account and start again. I've been reading/writing fanfic as far as I can remember, but that was in my mother language and I had to gather so much courage to try it in english. But I'm happy I did. And I would love to hear your ideas and maybe see what you can write <3 it's never too late.

I'm with a few fics ideas including a series and I'm really looking forward to write them all, I hope you like them when the time comes!! And don't worry, I don't feel pressured at all <3

About my work!!! Yes, the holidays are worldwide as far as I'm concerned but since my job has a flexible working hours and it's remote, it sounds good but I actually never stop working. I work with advertising and we spend money to upload ads and even for every time someone clicks in our ads, so I have to check the data from time to time to make sure the incoming compensates the money we're spending. If not, I have to take it down and change the campaign 100% it's maddening

Ok now I feel like I TALKED TOO MUCH!!! I'm sorry. But thank you for your message and all the love you always give me, I have no words for you but I really really appreciate it every time you pop in my inbox <3 and please if you feel comfortable let's be moots.

#askaway #anon

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iloveupitch · 1 year

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(sharing some ventish shit i wrote last month instead of following my lessons)

(haha i hope she doesn't find my account or im doomed)

guys i miss my partner so bad right now you have no fucking idea i hope she's not mad at me for stuff because if she is i might go insane

idk everytime she's kinda off im scared that she's upset because of something i've done or said to her and i dont want her to be upset because of my shitty actions anymore. i overthink a lot and i end up crying and trembling because im a piece of shit. i sure am a piece of shit that's why nobody fucking likes me but her. i want to see her again and tell her how sorry i am and make a decent apology for all the awful things she had to suffer because of me. i want to make her feel like she doesn't have to hide anything from me, but i scared her and she's probably still here with me because of a trauma response and not because she actually wants to be with me. i just want to fix all of this and live as if nothing happened, but i know it won't be possible. actions have consequences and i still have to learn that. i just want to be able to talk to her about anything and anyone without it being one sided and shit and i also want to be understood and listened by her. i want to hold her close and give her all the affection i haven't given her during the whole problematic relationship, i hope she will appreciate it even though i think she's going to forget it right after i do it. she's got lots of other people with her and everyone is kind and includes her everywhere and i don't see why she would still look for me and waste time. i really want to kiss her cheeks and show her that i truly love her. i love almost everything about her (yeah there are always things we don't like about someone but that doesn't mean their personality is based off that thing lol): she can be so genuine when she wants to and she's VERY cringe and corny, but in a positive way. i love how she's so emotional and tries her best to understand people. i wonder what goes through her head everyday and i wish i could shut it off. i love her ways of showing affection to me because they're genuine and corny as fuck and i love corny people. i love her red hair, it's not usual to be in a relationship with a ginger and as much as i joke about me hating gingers i think she is very pretty, even though I can't really look at her face and keep eye contact with her idk why. but still sometimes i literally panic when she does something flirty with me. i don't know tbh, i've got lots of feelings for her bit at the same time im scared of being too much and also being dependant on her, but i hope not. i would only choose her through anyone.

this is so fucking corny i know and im not used to writing this kind of things but i truly love that girl. i really hope i can be her first choice because she's mine, and i wish she could see herself the way i see her everyday.

#wlw #ginger ppl #ginger #i miss my gf #fuck this shit #vent #wlwvent #crying out loud #why does it have to be like this #se la mia bitch non ha lo smalto bianco non la scopo nella street #what am i gonna do when she moves out jjahahajhahahahh

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diavolosthots · 3 years

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Since almost everyone will be flooding your ask with requests, so I came here to tell you that thank you so so much, I have been extremely stressed due to drastic turn of events in my life. I lost my grandmother last year and she was more than a parent to me, my boyfriend (now ex) cheated on me, I didn't pass my job exam and lots of more things, So after all of those I have been severely depressed, but after I found your account I have been like reading your works almost everyday and maybe we never talked or interacted (I am bad at starting any conversation or to share my thoughts), yet I felt that somehow our thoughts matches so well and what I loved most about you that you have no filter, you speak what you think not caring about what others might think. I really really appreciate you being so honest. I have been recovering well and never felt lonely liy before because of your writings. Thank you so so much, you're absolutely one of the most talented writers I have ever seen. I truly admire you and you do deserve to be all the love you get and you give😊

Please stay healthy and safe, I wish you a very happy and healthy life ahead.

Youre right. Everyone flooded them and i closed them after only 6 hours because i was already overwhelmed lol

I'm so sorry you had such a rough past few months. Men are trash, stick to the fictional ones. Or get yourself a gal or non-binary pal. Honestly anything other than a cis straight man lets be real (and i can say that because I'm a straight female. Real Straight men suck ass, change my mind. (That's a lowkey jk btw)).

Im at a point in my life where I catered to people enough and I'm not about lies. I'm blunt and honest and if people have issues with that, they can leave, but i have found that i actually attract a lot of people that way haha so thats lovely ❤

I'm so glad you could find some comfort in my fics and please know you can always reach out to me, even if youre bad at starting conversations :)

#admin #love #youre so sweet anon #i hope life works out for you #nothing but the best

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ifdragonscouldtalk · 3 years

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hey you do not know me but i want you to know that you do not need to feel scared about what you are feeling.

bad feelings come and go

even if right now you feel as if it does not feel better, it will not go away, one day it will. even if this does not feel like it is going to end, or that these feelings of depression will take over, keep your head up and push through this because one day you are going to look back on yourself and be immensely proud of how strong you are, how brave you were for going through what you did.

depression is a bitch. be a bitch right back. do not let it have its way with you.

since you said there was a lacking in positive interaction in your life, here are some things i like about you

your writing, i found your essay and it led me to your tumblr where i have since found your ao3

the banner to your account, i think it is so cute and i especially love jim’s outfit and the earrings mccoy and spock have

your opinion over mckirk, i totally agree with you there. i personally think that jim and mccoy are a perfect example of platonic soulmates

our shared love of oddthesungod like wow that man can draw

your effing name! talon is like the coolest name ever.

rok. need i say more.

Wrapped Around My Wrist (Choking Off My Breath) - this. oh my god. i cried while reading this i loved it very much it is definitely in my top 10 fics i have ever read

i know my writing must not be that great or grammatically correct but i saw your post and felt as if i needed to say something. if this comes off as stupid or unneeded, just save it for a time when it is. :) goodbye

hey anon

despite what i say, i really dont cry easily. its a side effect of my medications that i hate -- it takes so damn much for me to cry and most of the time i really wish it were easier because it always makes me feel better

this message made me cry

im sitting her sobbing because it has been so long since i felt seen like that haha. thank you. thank you so much. your words may not be needed but they are so appreciated. ive struggled for so long that even though i know what you say is true, it means so much that someone cares enough to remind me and to recognize that i can be proud of myself for where i am now. and i laughed when you told me to be a bitch right back. that's definitely my attitude this week haha

im honestly so overjoyed that you found me through my essay haha. i was so scared to link it to my tumblr because i like to keep my personal and online life separate but it brings me so much joy that it touched you so much you sought me out. and my banner. i thought no one looked at it, honestly. i hated how that piece turned out but i was so proud working on it and i was just so happy that i got to create it that when it didn't get notes i wanted it to be somewhere. im- im so unbelievably overjoyed that you noticed it and took the time to look at the details. god.

i have a truly unhealthy obsession with odd haha. truly a sun god, he brightens up my day so much when he posts

i cant believe you're one of the few people who read rok. again, im so so proud of that work... and wrapped around my wrist.... definitely my two favorite fics ive written. i reread them pretty often haha how embarrassing. im so pleased that they're your favorites too, i put so much into them. im sorry wrapped around my wrist made you cry though ;v;

i want to save this but i need you to know that this has just. its made my day. im just going to curl up and cry awhile and hopefully ill feel better in the morning. thank you. thank you so much. the fact that you took the time to try and cheer me up.... it really means the world right now. i appreciate you and all my friends so much.

thank you love

#anon #anonymous #ask #answer #cheer up #words #my favorite people #dragon life #2021

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hongism · 3 years

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hi caly boo its ur 🌊 anon! i finally finished the most brilliant darkness and oh my lawd i’m in spain without the s. to put it shortly: U DID NOT DISAPPOINT BESTIE, and it seems unreal that u and ur mind and this fic even exists bc every moment is just polished to perfection, while simultaneously every character is polished to a sort of imperfect perfection(?). i have so many questions and things to say idek where to start, and tho im not good with words and even worse at deciphering hidden meanings, here are just some of my thoughts that i remember from the story.

hello my dear!!! eee im gonna answer separately since i think i’ll be very long-winded as usual but first of all thank you so much :(( this fic is actually very full of subliminal messages and hidden nuances that are weaved throughout which i think could be quite confusing so i apologize for that! if i had managed my time better, i would have adjusted when i started the fic to account for managing those aspects of the fic but alas i’m terrible at time management and i suck so. anyways.

first of all, ngl halfway into the story i lowkey forgot this was a wooyoung fic bc SANNN and also bc wooyoung appeared like 3 times lol. even after it finishing all that, i still had my doubts as to why this is a wooyoung fic, or more like why is san this significant in a wooyoung fic. im still a bit slow on these pls forgive me and im just curious why u made it like that.

i think yeah the most interesting thing about this fic is the emphasis on san over wooyoung. and when looking over it yeah i could have switched san and wooyoung’s characters and called it a day, but wooyoung really in my mind acts as the integral turning point for decisions made in the story.

the goal with the fic wasn’t really to be hyperfocused on the pairing itself, but rather the emotions and thought processes of each character (aside from wooyoung). wooyoung was kept intentionally mysterious and a bit set apart from the rest of the fic because his role in story was moreso an abstract of hestia, the goddess of the hearth and home. wooyoung’s character appeared in times where y/n was struggling with the thought of home or adjusting to the new changes in her life! wooyoung’s pairing itself was actually intended to be solely platonic at first, but as the story went on i thought having mc develop feelings for him added another turning point in the fic!

moving on, the second biggest question i had is the whole hestia!wooyoung and cafe aurora situation. i did a bit of reading on hestia and only found out that she was the goddess of hearth, which might explain the fireplace and the kind of homey feeling to the cafe. and ‘cafe aurora not really existing to most’ part, which was already hinted at wooyoung randomly disappearing, mc never seeing the cafe before or wooyoung only bringing people he wants into it. i get that him inviting mc must suggest her significance to him, but why was he so adamant about his friends not mentioning him or the cafe to mc before that? wooyoung is quite a mysterious character i think, and given that this fic is supposed to be about him, it’s a bit odd that there’s still so many things left unknown, but its kinda cool that way nonetheless and im guessing u would also like to explain that further outside of the story too.

i think my biggest regret about this fic is the fucking summary.... i wrote that summary well before i even started writing the fic thinking it would go in that direction but it didn’t. and since this fic was for a collab, i left the summary as is because i genuinely cannot for the life of me figure out a better one. but i’m trying to figure out a better one. but i really fucking hate the current summary because it’s not at all what the fic is truly about and i hate it.

however, i don’t hate the fic itself, and the reason why i don’t is because i got to play with both my writing style and how i displayed the story. for this collab we were asked to pick a greek god and one of the seven deadly sins, and i selected hestia and sloth. and initially i had intended to have sloth be represented by the reader’s depression, and wooyoung be a more ‘real’ depiction of hestia. i shifted gears very early on in the fic but what it became is moreso abstract realizations in the characters.

san’s character is meant to be this idea of sloth, and it’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t want to move forward, he wants to go slow, he wants to stop moving so fast through life, and those things point to him being a depiction of sloth

wooyoung’s was harder to encapsulate in a more abstract way but you hit the nail on the head really with the homey feeling of the cafe. beyond that, mc talks about just naturally feeling at ease and comfortable with how things are with wooyoung and being around him, and he takes up this role of being the likeable, warm, cozy, comforting character. it all comes to a head in the last scene where he brings both y/n and san into the cafe.

and again wooyoung’s character is meant to be most mysterious and abstract, but if i had had more time to fully flesh out the fic, i think i would have liked to touch more on him. at the same time however i left it more open-ended and open to interpretation. the significance in him inviting mc in and not being mentioned by the others sooner is twofold. one; the others never really had any reason whatsoever to mention wooyoung. he was a friend outside the circle who never joined in with them when mc was around. i personally in my own friendships don’t mention friends outside the circle by name or anything, just kinda vaguely talking about them unless im certain the people know who this person is. the concept of wooyoung having to invite mc in was more nuanced and vague as well, intentionally so, but that was moreso meant to represent this idea of ‘you can’t make a home somewhere where you aren’t invited’ so y/n couldn’t fully make a home of the place she was in without being invited in and welcomed in, but again that’s something i wish i had more time to fully flesh out.

the hongjoong speech about love (and also the interaction with seonghwa after that) deserves a standing ovation of its own 👏 unfortunately, or not, im not actually going through the emotional turmoil regarding love the same way as hj or mc to be able to fully relate to his words, but the whole ‘if you dont love what u see in the mirror then u dont love it’ mentality really hit me hard, and i’d like to hang onto that when i make decisions in the future haha thank you wise caly! seonghwa and hongjoong’s story is also beautiful, and just like mc said, the more i look at it the more it hurts :’)

the hongjoong speech about love was meant to be something very jaded and specific to his worldview. it actually isn’t wholly how i view love personally, but it was a perfect description to how both he and y/n perceived the love in their own lives. mostly thanks to their own emotional turmoils. the mentality of the mirror quote is something that i think i also struggle with, which is why i included it. it’s hard to do, but even in friendships, i think it’s necessarily to stop and look at the person you were before this relationship and then the person during this relationship. if you don’t love the one you are now, then maybe it’s a sign to reflect and see the bigger picture, so that was a lil reminder to myself and i’m glad it touched you as well!!!

“do you love him, or do you love the idea of being in love with him?” - haha i see what u did there (or maybe i didnt please dont laugh at me if i didnt). its still so good everytime i see it bc i keep finding myself loving just the idea of things time and time again even when this makes total sense to me oof :/

heh yeah again with the more abstract concepts this one was more direct and ‘cliche’ but i fully wanted that cliche in the fic because i thought it suited the situation where mc was constantly struggling with a version of san that she thought she loved vs the version of san she got every time they were together

despite how enlightened she seems to be, mc still made the same choices, and i wanna smack her for it and pat her back at the same time. and maybe also bc of the fact that she feels so differently for the two men that i feel like no ending could really justify her decision, so ending in the vague is probably the best. your ending might kind of allude to someone more than the other already, and tho i still don’t think he’s the best one for her based on just my pov on love, i kinda agree with you. but again, this raises the question of, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic?

and yeah the whole knife in the chest at the end of it all is that she was still too scared to face the music so to speak. but really i would say she made the same choices up until the conversation on the balcony with san. and you’re absolutely right, the reason i chose the ending the way i did was because either way, there’s no justification. and actually although it might seems like i was alluding to someone specific, san being in the cafe at the very end was moreso to represent that as much as they fought, he still very much loved her and wanted to be loved by her. it was kinda an open casket ending there were no nails in the coffin, the choice between wooyoung and san still stands and an argument could be made for either of them! i think this is a fic that i could see myself revisiting one day with two endings - one for san, and one for wooyoung.

something i didn’t mention earlier about wooyoung’s character being left intentionally mysterious was that he was representing a new and budding love. the honeymoon phase where you’re falling for someone you don’t even really know. you are the reader aren’t meant to really know who wooyoung is because of that beyond what you read about him, so his past and such was left out intentionally to represent that idea of ‘hey wow im in love with a stranger!’ whereas san was this gritty love that’s bad for you. and there are pros and cons to each just as with anything!!

so,,,, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic? well i picked wooyoung for my collab so he was one of the main focuses of the fic regardless of which direction i took with it. as for why wooyoung wasn’t more forward, i already answered that but !!! i view it as both a wooyoung fic and a san fic. both are highlighted characters with main pairing roles!

i literally just woke up to write this and am going back to sleep ahaha so i apologize if this makes no sense. i somehow felt like i’ve read so much yet so little at the same time, maybe bc there are still so many things i havent fully made sense of, and that’s where i hope you come in and enlighten me. i still stand by my word that this fic deserves so much more recognition despite the lack of explicit smut bc of how much more you’ve explored through character building. love you caly and thank u for working so hard <3 — 🌊

no worries my beloved i hope you go back to sleep and get lots and lots of rest!! and i hope my response helps enlighten the not so clear things as well dgjdklfg but really thank you so much. it was a long fic and hard to get through at times, but as a whole, i’m proud of it and what i created, so thank you for recognizing my efforts and appreciating them 🥺

#🌊 anon #fic; the most brilliant darkness

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funnymalemodels · 4 years

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hi how r u there? i’m missing your lots of post of the gods lol. how’s your day in this pandemic? sorry it’s not related queston of your blog, hope you’re doing ok in this situation. pls post more gods cos im boring af on insta and i miss male models here.

....hi dear anonymous...:D!!!!....awwwwwwww!!!....*silent tears*...HUGE THANKS!!!...awww i truly apreciated this message......awwwwww....i’m doing welll.....:)....thank u for asking!!!...awwww...and i hope u are doing well too...*silent tears*!!!!.....oh this pandemic situation is a challenge for many people who are not used to be by themselfs.....idk if that is ur case.....but for me is not new......i’ve always prefer stay at home...and get my distance from ppl...XD...so i’m quite enyoing the moment ...but ofc is sad that many ppl is strugelling and so on...so i hope u being safe and sound....and u can write me anytime....XD....i want to post more work of GODS...however the last collections in general are awful and i think this lack of creativity in fashion in general sucks coz they are just boring tbf....slry i didn’t like them...but hope this will get better ...the major problem is those instamodels....but i prefer not to say much coz u never know how the future will be....i’ll do my best to put some worthy material here...XD....hahah i got an insta account haha...but just 4 work...and insta in general is boring af...u can always take a look here...coz even i don’t post much GODS as i used to...XD...i got some interesting and funny storys....sooo...HUGE THANKS 4 this lovely question!!!!.....*tears*...and i wish u have an extraordinary day and life!!!....u deserve it!!!...:D!!..

ps:....awwwwww.....!!!!..:’)!!!

#HUGE THANKS!!!#awwww #awww those lovely ppl #at the verge to cry #i'm crying!!!!#awwwwweeeee #please be safe and sound #;)

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aharris00britney · 5 years

Photo

ASKS 14

Ok so 24 hours after I planned to do this but... last time I answered stuff was January(5 months ago). There is a lot under the cut ;n; sims, nonsims, other games, all kinds of stuff ya know

Anonymous said: Hi! Wcif the shirt you used on your Belle hair post? (Btw, that hair is GORGEOUS.)

I have the cc I use in my previews linked on Patreon. Makeup/skin and all that will be on my resource page once I get around to updating it for my 2 new models (who will be up for download soon hopefully). Also ty <3

Anonymous said: What make-up do you use for most of your posts?

The only eyeshadows I use are by @crypticsim or @catplnt. The makeup I use on Macie/Taylor are listed on my resource page. The other two models makeup will be added once I get them added on there but I know they both use similar stuff to Macie/Taylor.

@thatsimmergirl91 said: Just wanted to take a moment out and say how amazing you are ! I love all your stuff and your blog. Never forget how awesome you are 💗💗💗💗🙌🏻🙌🏻

Thank you so much. Like I know I am going to be typing a lot of thank yous in this post, but I truly mean them. Playing Sims/Making cc is something I did not think would be such a big thing in my life but god is it and I love doing it. Thank you again <3

Anonymous said: You're incredible and I love all your hairs! In fact, you're my favorite cc hair creator. My question is are you planning on making any hairs with the Island Living meshes anytime soon?

Thank you! I am glad you enjoy my hairs <3 I am planning some stuff with the island living meshes. Probably just a conversion to toddlers if I am able and I might do something simple with the adult meshes to release outside of my Patreon stuff. We shall see though! Ty again

@ayoshi said: When are you opening an Onlyfans?

idk babe when are you posting your birthmarks? ;)

Anonymous said: Heya! Love your cc! You're real talented

thank you! <3 It isn’t so much talent, more or less just a lot of practice and time. I appreciate the compliment though

Anonymous said: any tips to get high quality sims screenshots??

I have 2 methods I use. When I am taking CC previews I rotate my screen using Ctrl + Alt + the ◄ key. For my lookbooks/upcoming Sim downloads I use a method by foursims who deactivated?? This is the method/video <3

@verdeclaroangels said: What skin do you use??💕PS i love u

I use @luumia newest vanilla default, alongside his Smooth Butts overlay, and my own fruitpunch overlay. All are linked over on my resource page <3

@vhlori said: Austin queen of pop!

q king of edits! <3

Anonymous said: i love your creations and i appreciate the time you put into your cc, i wish i could support you 💕

Thank you!! Sometimes the time crunches can be stressful but I put them on myself so I survive haha. Don’t feel the need to support me please <3 I make sure everything is public eventually so that people dont feel like they are missing out on anything by deciding not to pledge. Thank you for wanting to though, I appreciate that a ton.

Anonymous said: Just a rant here. I'm annoyed that there are no rings in the glove category or some other category. The reason I want this is because I use eyelashes that are in the skin detail section and rings don't work and I don't want to use the accessory eyelashes because my sim wears glasses. It annoys me but that's all.

i... rant away luv i feel u

Anonymous said: What do you do besides sims? That is all you post about and I was curious if that is all you play?

I play Roblox with @ayoshi sometimes, cause that is about all my computer can handle lmao. I have a switch so I play some Nintendo titles on there like Zelda, Splatoon 2, and other stuff. I also have been plying Fortnite recently with @imvikai @greenllamas and @pinealexple. That is about all I play right now lmao. I play Animal Crossing Pocket Camp and Pokemon Go on my phone.

Anonymous said: Hi there ! Just wanted to say I've also been experiencing that problem with your 'downloads' page. I don't have a Tumblr account so I had to tell you this way. Perhaps it's a MacBook issue ? I'm not sure, but I'm using a MacBook Pro. Anyways, thank you for all the beautiful cc you provide us with, you're the best.

Yeah I got another ask about them using a Mac for it. That seems to be the problem. I am not a coder, nor do I know a single thing about coding. All I can suggest doing is going to http://aharris00britney.tumblr.com/tagged/s4cc and using that which sucks to page through I know :( I am sorry

Anonymous said: This is really random, but I love your Sims! I normally don't like Sims with Clay hair, but GIRL, you make them work. Just want to say to keep it up, and if I had money I would support you <3

Thank you lmao <3 stan clay hairs

Anonymous said: Literally im in this sims discord nd they were DRAGGING how you make the same sim in different skin colors and how you make such cookie cutter sims and honestly i felt bad

Meanwhile me in CAS:

Anonymous said: This may be a strange request but what does that one alien toddler you've used on multiple occasions to model hair look like when he's older?

He uuh... idk where they are in my library tbh I can’t find them cause I was going to age him up and show ya but.. yeah idk what happened RIP alien toddler

@amorimlulu said: Hi! I love your creations, they're incredible! I'm completely in love with two of your sims: the asian woman from the patreon 06-16 post and the woman from the ava hair post. Could you, pretty please, upload them on the gallery? I'm dying to play with them. Thank you ^^

I am planning to in the next month! I have the photos taken I just need to get the CC list together and plan it around Island Living posts, CC posts, all that jazzzzzz

Anonymous said: Hello Austin! I really like the way your sims look, so I was wondering if you can tell me where to get the skins and lashes, please? I am new to the Sims 4 and searching for some cute looks :)

Hey! I have this stuff listed on my resource page, and I have over 100 WCIF’s I have answered along with my lookbooks for some clothes. My cc finds blog is @aharris00finds if you want to look there :D

Anonymous said: can i just ask? how do you remove the shadows on hair with S4S? im a complete noob at s4s and i was wondering how you would do it?

You just need to click shadow, then make blank :) pic below

Anonymous said: Hi, just a quick message to say THANK YOU for all those beautiful creations. You are so talented and I want you to know that. Thank you so much for making my sims look way more beautiful !

thank you so much <3 I have said it before and idk if anyone will be able to convince me, but I am not talented lmao it just is experience :)

Anonymous said: hey, could u pls make a tutorial abt how u make ur mesh?? i love ur hair meshes so much

I have tried filming a tutorial before and I will just have to wait til I get a good mic lmao. My speed meshing videos are somewhat useful for learning but they are sped up and without instructions so take it with a grain of salt

Anonymous said: would you ever try to recreate lydia martins hair in 3.04? sorry, but you're the only teen wolf fan thats a simblr that i know and i desperately need that lovely hair in my game. thanks!

tbh I never finished Teen Wolf XD I stopped at the end of season 5 I think. Idk I just lost interest as I grew up :( Also I have no idea what hair that is sdfgfvb and google isnt telling me either. If you can send a link to a picture or DM me a picture I can see if I can make it <3

Anonymous said: Hi, could you please please upload this sim post/183989453251/e41 ! She's just too pretty

Anonymous said: please upload this sim from your post/183989453251/e41 for download? Thanks

Idk if I still have her saved but if I do I might upload her. I will check and see later tonight lmao

Anonymous said: Is there any way to put everything you make into a .zip file. I really like what you make and I wish there was a way to mass download it. It sounds dumb but really I enjoy your content

Tbh since I post hairs 3 times a month it would be hard for me to keep everything up to date. I might do something like all my CC from 2017 in one zip, and all my cc from 2018 in another? and then make one for 2019 at the end of the year. I’m not sure though.

Anonymous said: Wheres the hair in yo profile pic? And will you upload that sim? AND can you make more clothes ur amazing at it!!! (Also, asking 4 my bff <3 r u boy or girl?)

the hair in my current profile pic is Maddie Hair, the sim is already for download, and I will have some clothes coming next month :) I am a boy :P

Anonymous said: hello! is the model sim in your eve hair valentines special downloadable? I find her really pretty. I really enjoy all of your cc!! I love all of them soooo much.. :)

I will check if I saved her to my library, if so I will add it to the list of stuff I wanna try and do <3 also thank you

Anonymous said: Hey! Love your hairs! Can I request a Riley hair without the hairclip?

the riley hair doesn’t have a clip so I am going to assume you mean the Peyton hair since it was released in the same month. It wouldn’t really be possible to do Peyton without the clip since it has a part of the hair going up into the clip. Without it there would be a hole and if the hole was filled in it would still look weird since the hair would be going up into nothing. I’m sorry <3

@lacr1mation23 said: Kinda not a question. But, i'm gonna fangirl all over you. You ROCK!!! I LOVE your CCs. BEST. HAIRS. EVAR. Impressed like woah from Florida.

thank you so much ;n; this made me smile lmao I appreciate stuff like this a ton

Anonymous said: Hey I think there's something wrong w/ your Lydia hair.. could u fix it?

I’m not sure what the glitch is, so if you could send me a photo or an explanation of what it is then I could help.

Anonymous said: I'm sorry you're having a bad day! I want to let you know your CC is lovely and I hope you have a better day tomorrow! Lots of love and if you like chocolate then I'm sending you plenty of virtual chocolate to help you feel better!

lmao idk what ‘bad day’ I was happening when this was sent but thank you!! I had a rough semester but I am doing a lot better now I think :)

@simsloverlilian said: Hi lol I just think this is really funny, my friend asked me where do you get your cc? and I was like: "oh.. ahoob's WCIF place xDDDDDD" and we both died laughing.. at your place you can get amazing hairs, accs, shirts! (lol love your cc keep it up! ;))

thank you so much! I love that yall use my blog for finding cc :)

@raha-plays-the-sims said: Okay... I actually want to take a screenshot of my Sim with your new Riley hair on to my hair dresser and tell her to cut my hair that way XD I love it so much! Thank you for continuing to make amazing content!

lmao i have wanted to do this before with a male hair i found for my game. I never went through with it though XD thank you for the compliment <3

Anonymous said: Everyone!!! Stan LOONA for clear skin and good health...

stan red velvet and WJSN

Anonymous said: I just want to say that "EVERYTHING" about your blog/cc/sims is absolutely immaculate. Your CC is like renaissance to Sims 4 modding(I ain't even kidding).Thank you for sharing/uploading them here on tumblr. Would you be uploading any video on how you create your sims on youtube anytime soon? And what sliders do you usually use in creating sims if there are some?

thank you so much!!! I have tried recording my game before and the footage just comes out super lag. Hopefully later this year I will be able to get a computer and I could record something then. Also I don’t use any sliders or presets on my main Sims :)

@lllac-lady786 said: This isn’t a question, but your sims are just so pretty and you are so talented 🤩

thank you <3

Anonymous said: Did something happen to your Lydia hair?

I don’t think so? It seems to be fine for me

Anonymous said: How are you able to edit the new game pack when sims4studio hasn't been updated yet? I am itching to edit some stuff but I can't yet :(

I use CAS Tools! I might make a tutorial this week depending on how busy I am. Not sure though <3

Anonymous said: How likely would you be to recommend the new pack to another simmer out of 10?

(this was sent during Strangerville) I would say 8/10 recommendation. But I love storylines and stuff in games so my opinion is very based on that.

Anonymous said: Would you ever make male hair or recolour some of ea's so they work with your ombre accessory?

I am thinking of doing some ombre accessories for the new Island Living pack for the two ombre hairs. I am not sure if I will be able to or not but I will see :)

@milugameplay said: Hello sweetheart, I just like to say that I love the hairs that you create. Thank you for sharing them with us.

thank you <3 i appreciate the compliment

Anonymous said:Hi! When you uploaded peach earrings, the blonde sim had a braided hairstyle. Was it cc or a maxis one?

hey! It is from outdoor retreat GP :)

Anonymous said: Have nothing to ask. Just want to tell you that you are amazingly talented. ❤ I have been playing the sims since its original Sims 1 release, and have always been a heavy CC user. (Upwards of 50GB in sims 3). Never have I ever felt the need to download EVERYTHING a creator has ever made, until I found you. So, in short, you are amazeballs. Keep it up.

this is so sweet lmao. Even I don’t have all my own CC in my game <3 I appreciate this so so much. Thank you for this

Anonymous said: How did you learn to create custom content??Did you see any video tutorial? I'm trying to create a hair but I can not get it :(((( help me please

most of the stuff I have learned from trial and error, or help from S4S fourms and friends :) Feel free to message me with questions on tumblr or discord

Anonymous said: I know Sims 5 is still so far away, but I still have a question! With the release of Sims 4 so many awesome creators for Sims 3 just stopped creating from one day to another. So my question is: Could you imagine yourself creating Custom Content for Sims 5? I'm asking because I seriously love every single piece you create for Sims 4, and I really wish the glory era of Ah00b won't end with the release of Sims 5. Ily! <3

it depends on the style that TS5 goes for tbh. I love Sims 4 style and I don’t know much of anything about creating alpha hairs so if TS5 goes that direction I doubt I would be able to create for it. also thank you for calling it the glory era of ah00b lmao

Anonymous said: You have hairs named after all the girls in black pink except Rosé. Is there a reason for this?

Well I named a hair Rosanne thinking it was close enough to her name lmao. I might name a hair coming in July Rosie. We shall see when it gets to July XD

#asks #oml this was a mess bc my computer froze after I answered all these the first time and I had to go back through and reanswer #so I didn't answer some stuff the second time bc I was a bit annoyed with my computer #inbox is cleared Ill start answering stuff once a month #lets hope

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spacejew · 5 years

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oops accidental personal post I guess

It's weird that I almost feel the need to go here to personal blog again because of a handful of irl friends following what was supposed to be a private personal Twitter in theory, just for like, idk, internet strangers and friends I made online not those imported from meatspace. Also those character limits... Suffocating.

Anyways yeah things are kinda stable but dissapointing lifewise? I'm definitely in a rut and stuck somewhere I'm desperately trying to get out of. Also like. idk. Gender shit. I think I really fucked myself over hard when I made the decision a few years back to conviously bottle up all my dysphoria and trans feelings and bury them and repress them hard and just live as a very gay and feminine bi boy and like. hm. I think I've been happy since? But im thinking now that maybe. Because that's still a part of my psyche that haunts me every day. I might actually have been mildly depressed this whole time and like, still struggling to make important life decisions because of the anxiety of that. Idk. Maybe if I got a therapist and realistic attention to that all those years ago and it turned out to be very real n legit and i got to make tough choices and live my truth, I would be equipped now to actually be joyful and able to fully focus on hard work and taking risks and putting myself out there and being successful and shit. Idk idk idk. I just have to wonder if all this time I've actually been quite unhappy and filling the void with dumb shit and a good deal of dissociation and complacency. Idk. what I'm saying is maybe I made a big mistake there lmao and could've started transitioning, if that's right for me, 4-7 years ago maybe, who knows. Haha so fun. Fuck me. Big Regrets, lads. But also I still don't know if that's right. Which probs means it is who am I kidding. Oof. But it's ok life is a journey I'm full of wise shit and I know it's not the end of the world. It just kinda. Makes me so sad on behalf of the old me who would cry so much because of dysphoria and living in this body in this life. She knew. I don't know why I buried her alive like that. Anyways.

I spent all year struggling to make an animated short (which ended up being kinda long tbh like 10 minutes?) by myself mostly, just me and my mental blocks and executive dysfunction and shit, but I was v passionate about it and worked hard and got to actually bring a whole vision to life, with basically nobody to tell me what to do, just give me feedback that I wasn't obligated to follow. It came out pretty nice and I'm very happy that I got to tell exactly the story I wanted and try a cool new look and I just wish I gave myself more time to work on the actual animation part but I put my heart and endless weeks and months of refinement into the storyboarding and script and every little detail and I really feel accomplished and like it paid off -- and I even got to do a private screening at my summer camp job that I was called in to do one more time at the last minute right when I finished my film, it was a miracle and so perfect, everyone cried and truly loved it and felt touched by it. And then I went to animation festivals! And all this cool shit! But... I haven't been able to figure out a public screening thing yet. And I feel like all my excitement is gone now. And I really wanted to polish the look and some backgrounds a little, just some very quick rerendering and comp, but. I feel like too much time has passed, i just feel dissapointed. I haven't put it online yet cause I haven't done my public screening, cause of my stupid anxiety about little details and overall idk imposter syndrome I guwss I feel more ashamed of it than proud of it even tho it's probably good, and like I feel that everyone was excited to support me but probably nobody cares anymore.

Basically I had all the wind taken out of my sails. Oh and right when I was trying to get it off the ground I guess and push through, my grandma died. I'm so heartbroken I loved her so fucking much and. She never got to see the film cause of my stupid bullshit. I feel so bad about that. So so bad. Ugh. And it's a film very very hilariously blatantly directly based on me and my feelings and my real family history, ultimately besides other main themes it's about talking to your grandparents and family about the past and your current feelings. And in it the main character, a girl, cough cough even though it's basically me, cough cough go figure, gender shit, anyways the climax is her going back in time to talk to her great grandma, and it's very emotional and my best friend of like almost 10 years now composed and recording a music for that scene for me. And now when I eventually screen this, my entire family and also myself is gonna get torn to shreds by this scene more than intended because my own fucking grandma, who I was excited to show this film to more than anyone on earth, passed so unexpectedly without seeing it. Fuck. Why didn't I send it to her when she was in the hospital? Obviously cause if I did that that would make it real and she wouldn't get better and all I do is live in denial. Ugh. Anyways yeah. The point is I'm stagnant and in a rut right now and just want to move forward and focus on making new work and just get a real career relevant job already. Tough year hit a well needed high and now petering off back into misery. Not to be dramatic. I'm ok tbh I have a part time I'm slowly getting sick of and a loving supportive partner and some very good friends, tho not as many as I used to see regularly and that's kinda sad too. That's your 20s babey.

I just need to move on and make big changes. My pattern rn is like. Work fri-sun, if I'm lucky I get to hang out with friends or lovers, usually at least with my partner. on monday I recover from working. on tuesday I have dnd and usually get some stuff done but honestly just catch up on warframe with my clan friends. wednesday my partner and I got to the park and library for half the day and eat and draw and talk. on thursday I mentally prepare for work again and usually we go out to play another roleplaying game with her roommates friends. a lot of that free time that's been left unmentioned is spent being over at bae's sometimes so I don't have the ability to get much work done. Lately I've spent most of my time planning a dnd campaign which is fun but also too stressful on account of obviously I'm not playing it yet so like what's the point, sorry friends who have patiently waited for months for me to be ready to start the game for them. And also like. Yeah idk. just sad and confused and resting my weary heart and body after a very rough month after my grandma passed. But! I did accomplish a very crazy deep cleaning of my room. I threw out 14 bags of shit at the least. I wish I weighed it all, it was a lot. I feel so much more organized and cleansed from that. For the record I didn't have any trash in my room, nor was it every a mess. Just every single cabinet and drawer was crammed full of stuff and I guess I hoarded a lot of shit. I was able to throw away a lot of things I held on to be cause of sentimentality and I'm proud of myself for growing that way. So like. Idk. It's not all bad, baby steps. I still feel like I'm constantly improving as a person! I'm positive, optimistic. Just tired, anxious, and feel bad.

Also I finally got a new phone and because of my hubris I dropped it without a case and it shattered only two weeks in. The day I was gonna buy a case. But it's ok. Story of my life I guess. I can't keep everything pristine and polished forever, one day shit falls and breaks but it's still usable. It has character.

I wasn't expecting to dump everything like this, sorry yall. Thanks for reading I guess. Also I forgot how to do a read more on mobile lol sorry

#personal #capn whitey #tw death #i guess

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ily-like-a-banana · 6 years

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so, today is actually my birthday it is now 2019 which is crazy because i meant to post this on my birthday (it's on dec 12 lol) but anyway, i decided to write a little something as a way to kind of celebrate my 20 years of existence. it has truly been a year of growth for me; i’ve been actively seeking who i am, my potentials, the things i love and the things i am hoping to achieve even further.

i opened up this tumblr account early this year without any intention other than to just read the amazing works made by other carats. i haven’t been writing for years even though i spent a lot of my time doing so as a child. it would have stayed that way - a mere childhood hobby, if it weren’t for the writers i’ve stumbled upon on this site that i truly admire.

so here’s my little notes of love. ( thank you )

@boosoonhao: i remember when i stumbled upon your works, i just had this phase where i just could not stop reading and i have convinced myself that i’ve become your little secret fan. your ideas and how you convey your stories is something i’ll always be in awe of. the way you string your words really paint vivid images in my head and ah, i don’t think you can ever write something that i won’t enjoy. you write with simplicity yet you’re able to communicate scenes or feelings that are so complex, if that makes sense. ilysm.

@tonicandjins: i’m not sure how to explain it but when it comes to you, i just feel this sense of comfort? i’m not really one to drop messages and initiate conversations bc i’m extremely shy but you always seem warm and easy to talk to that i don’t feel the usual small panic feeling whenever i leave asks haha! your works have always felt... raw to me, in a sense that you really capture the emotions of the characters and it communicates to me as something real. like it isn’t just a fic i’m reading but it’s someone’s journal instead. you’re crazy talented and ilysm!

@lxveille: honestly, i’ve gone through countless times where i’d come home from school, feeling extremely worn out and dead but my cravings to read a fic would still peek out and my go-to has always been your works! you have a way of writing scenarios that depict little moments in life that is so easy to relate to. so i always feel connected to the people in the fics- actually, just the fics in general, and that is something i really admired about your works! i also just want you to know how much comfort and inspiration your works have provided me. ilysm!

@choco-seventeen: i vividly remember my jaw literally dropping when i read ‘ivory night’ which is the first fic i’ve ever read from you! your artistry for writing is out of this world, how can anyone have so much talent on their mere fingertips? your style of writing is really one that really leaves an impact; it’s memorable and so... you. no one else can write the way you do. i can’t even finish this paragraph right now, i’m sitting here thinking so deeply. i wish i did this much thinking for my classes. you just leave me in so much awe and ilysm! (your tags also never fail to make me laugh! you’re probably the wittiest person i know on this site, wow ily)

@taeiliee-writings: the loveliest person who knows how to write the loveliest pieces ♡ the first piece i've ever read from you was one that you made for jihoon titled 'what i wish to tell him' and honestly, you just captured my heart then and there. i remember thinking 'i will definitely look forward to more of her works' and i have never once been let down; your works just keep getting better and better! definitely, i would keep supporting you and witness your growth as a writer. i'm always rooting for you! ilysm!

@chillihansol: okay, a little story time: i first talked to you when i saw you answer an ask and you mentioned that your favorite book was shatter me by tahereh mafi and i was like !!!!! okay, i must get over my fear of talking to people so i dropped an ask lmao i was on anon tho bc i'm a big chicken :'> anyway, i've been reading a lot of your works even before then and let me just say that anyone who will stumble upon your works will know how talented you are at it especially with how you seamlessly build up to the final scene; it just weaves together smoothly and i have mad respect for that! ilysm!

and to all the writers who have left the site but nonetheless made my experience here an inspiring and pleasant one, thank you. ♡

love,

Jay :)

#little notes of love #boosoonhao #tonicandjins #lxveille #choco-seventeen #taeiliee-writings #chillihansol #thank you so much for being an inspiration for me!#i just thought making something like this would be a good idea #since im the type of person to...#...quietly appreciate people #but i thought it would be selfish of me if i just #kept it to myself #and also!!!#i just realized i never really mentioned my name?#hi my name is jay uwu #and happy new year!#all the love from me to you!!#have a great one!!

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inixsis · 5 years

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5 years later

Coming back and reading the few posts I had was a bit of a shocker, for many reasons. But im in a position where I really need to express myself again because I dont really have anyone else or any other way. So let the shitshow begin! I dont really know where to begin. I feel like ive grown a lot in some aspects, stayed the same in so many others. Ive definitely stayed the same when it comes to complaining unfortunately... Im well aware i do it, but its like word votmit. I dont string together what im trying to convey in the right way most of the time. Sometimes I swear people have this expectation of me that they put the words in my mouth before i can even finish a sentence. Like please, just let me finish. Anyway. Point blank, ive been an Alcoholic for about 5-7 years now. I dont really remember when it trulyyyy kicked in that i had such a dependency. But its only within the past year that if i dont get my fix, I go into a withdrawal state of shakes, tremors and sweats. i went to hospital about a year ago, so I didnt have a drink for around 12 hours. I was barely able to move. I was shaking so badly I could barely move my muscles or complete basic motor functions. Some mornings after only a few hours without alcohol i can barely type on my keyboard or use my mouse correctly. But with all of this, im still proud at other ways ive progressed. Ive quit marijuana. Ive mostly quit smoking. Ive only had green once in the past 2 years. I didnt have a single cigarette for almost 8 months up until recently and i only buy a pack once in a while. Along with that, I feel like my attitude and the way i address certain things has drastically changed also. Im not nearly as aggressive, paranoid or annoying as I used to be. But its never enough... Essentially im here to cry about how alcoholism has somewhat impacted my relationship, but how it also isnt the main reason its over. Its hard to explain right now heh. All i truely want to do is blame him and my perspectives of why he has started to act like this. Nothing is good enough lately. I can shower him with love, affection, appreiciation and all the space he needs but its not enough. I really dont feel my alcoholism can be the complete blame of our relationship - but definitely some things are to do with it. 1. He knew what he was getting into. And on that note, over 5 years ive done nothing but get better. Especially the past 2 years ive made huge changes whilst he has not. Alcoholism cant be compared to the mistakes he makes, but as a 29 year old he has never left his home, he doesnt pay rent or bills, he has a cushy life where his mother stole 1.2 million and is now in prison for it. But he thinks I would steal money from his account given the chance... 2. I paid for everything for the first 3 years He stayed in my homes non stop, i paid electricity for his pc or to run the aircon, i paid for and cooked 3 meals a day everyday for atleast a few days of every week. I cleaned up after him everytime. in 5 years he has cooked for me once, and by force. He has done dishes for me and bought me takeaway, dont get me wrong. but nothing compared to what ive spent. let alone the green and alcohol he would also consume. But granted he paid alot of fuel whilst i rarely topped him up. 3. Extreme patience with his privacy Theres a certain factor im not going to speak about in this. But ive always been quite upfront with him, never protected my phone or computer around him either. I understood a person needs their space and if he is not willing then thats ok - but only to a point. at 5 years we should be able to share phones. Once i wasnt allowed to hold it to use his flashlight during a power out. thats insane. I went to reddit over this and there were suggestions such as ‘are you clumsy?’ and well... no. he has swerved his car once when i went for his phone to search a location. 4. Games come first Its been a rocky 2 years. Ive asked him to spend more time with me regularly, threatened if he did not take 1 less night a week from raiding im done - and i left. But then his mothers case of theft came in and he was distraight, said he needed me. I couldnt help but give in, so gave him another chance for the sake of moral support. I also very recently came across a chat with some chick online. ‘I guess i havent found my gamer girl yet’ he said. - i am younger, but have been gaming much longer than him and on different platforms - I am the one he had to compete with in WoW - I am the one who taught him many things and showed him all these things about the game - I take a couple years off of certain games because of my anger and suddenly i am no longer a gamer, let alone his girl. Made me sick to the stomach. All ive done is change myself to look towards our future and this is all the shit I get. So heres to the men in my history that may read this - karma came the FUCK back around and truly i hope youre doing well. I think im going to keep on posting again, I need some form of comfort. id like to ultimately turn this into a blog about alcoholism, sobriety and all the things that come with this. I need something to focus on for a bit haha. Best wishes all <3

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nipuni · 6 years

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Bless online related asks and mmo talk 😄 for anyone interested! I’m collecting it here so that I don’t spam everyone with it haha

Novosomnium said:

is it truly worth it? cause i have been considering the game, am a long time mmo gamer myself. im hoping this will turn out like ESO [its my current mmo]. horrid horrid launch, but great improvements overtime. Ive been waiting for bless for almost 8 years. it looks so magnificent, but im always worried it will turn out like FFXIV. i got bored of it within 3 months.the discourse that exploded cause of the game and game devs, is intense at the moment. o.0 i heard there was gonna be a complete server reset cause of a game breaking duplicate bug that got ported over from the japanese version.

I have not played ESO so I could not say if it is a similar game that you will enjoy, I have played FFXIV though! and I think it is a fantastic game to be honest, the expansions have been amazing, the story is amazing, the craft is probably the best i’ve tried, it is unique and solid and the player base is so much better than in any other mmo I’ve played, I think everything except maybe the pvp in the game is great, BUT I also ran out of things to do after a few months and was just waiting for the next expansion most of the time. I compare Bless to Aion because of the faction versus faction theme that will sort of force you into pvp at some point, as well as the flying mounts, and manastone system, the character customization is also very similar, I’m not sure if you have played Aion though but that is the closest thing I can think of to give you an idea. The duplicate exploit has been fixed as far as I know, I believe they removed the bug as well as the money earned through it, and the servers have not been reset, I haven’t read much about this though, only what people talk about in game 😅

Umabass said:

Sadly, the forced world pvp is a killer for me, otherwise I'd definitely try it. I play Black Desert, but on Japanese server where the mentality is much different from Western players (got killed by player grand total 2x in 2 years).

Ahh yes if pvp is not your thing then faction vs faction is a bad idea, there are some potions you can buy that make you inmune to pvp but I believe the max level ones are only available through the cash shop and they only last 10 minutes, so they are only for very specific tasks 😰

wicked-eyes-and-wicked-hearts said:

This game is beautiful. I've always loved good character creation. By the way, is that Solas standing by Nalia's side? If so, that's pretty cool! It seems like so much fun to be able to explore the world with a companion by your side. Maybe I'll give it a try too! Thank you so much for the review, and for the person who asked the question! (:

It really is, especially the cities! The character creator has sliders which is great, body sliders too! That person in the screenshot is Nicolas’ character, I am the one who made a Solas so sadly I can’t play both Solas and Nalia at once, I should have made him in Nicolas account ; ; hahah but it is very fun to play with a partner! we also play with a friend, we have been playing together for many years, the more the merrier 😊

kayleana said:

My sister has been a heavy MMORPGer for years, and she absolutely loves this game. All of the complaints are being heard by the company, and people need to understand it's still in early access phases. (I think they're working on the PVP thing, according to my sister.) If anyone has any in depth questions, she knows a ton about the game. Just shoot me a DM, and I'll ask her. (Last night, she went into an in depth thesis about why she supports the game, lmao)

I agree with your sister! the game has been launched before in other regions but this is the first self publish they do as a company. The game has also failed several times and has been reworked so now they are trying to do things differently and adress past mistakes I think that is nice! they seem determined and are being very active from what i’ve seen 😊

nauface said:

Are you on Lilyanthes? I'm enjoying Bless, as well!

I am on Tanara, Union faction 😄

perijules said:

God it looks gorgeous. Wish it wasn't PvP focused. That's not really my thing with mmos

It is! It was the main reason I wanted to try it out, the scenery looks amazing! although I do enjoy pvp in mmos, and if you are looking to avoid it then I would not recommend 😰

Anon said:

I can't seem to find out through the steam page but is bless online monthly payment?

It is buy to play with an optional monthly subscription! The main game is around $30 usd I believe, unless you go for special packs, the subscription is $15 usd, but is really not necessary (BDO’s subscription felt necessary for example, Tera’s offers good advantages too, this one on the other hand is really just optional)

#bless online #nips replies

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04loved · 7 years

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To A Happy 2018

This isn’t a follow forever or mutual list, I just wanted to give a little personal shoutout to some of you who make tumblr a place i want to keep coming back to.

There are many more wonderful people I didn’t mention, but I hope in the coming year to step out of my comfort zone a little and try to talk to you all more, even if it is only over anon. To everyone who has sent me an encouraging message or anon in recent days, I was truly touched and I thank you so much. To all of my followers, i love you and you’re doing great and i hope you have a soft 2018 filled with love and good things!!

@bbhsavocado i feel like i learned so much about u pricilla that night of the bbh in panties talk aldkjsgljk how validating to see my kinks shared n sub bbh appreciated like that, but it was also awful n i hated it. i love all ur bisexual bbh-loving content n ur friendship with some mutuals is so adorable i hope u all find great gfs this year <3 i have no idea y i took so long to follow u bc ur everything i want in a blog

@bbhsthighs nicole, u want to be a person who gives happiness like the boy who inspired ur url, and u do, u really really do. ur hilarious and adorable in ur tags and ur interactions with ur other friends on here. i can tell how much you love them and how much they love you back <3 maybe some ppl first liked u for ur humor and light, but love means accepting u when ur hurting and when u dont feel like u can shine anymore. pls dont be afraid to share that side of you with those who deserve ur trust, bc thats what a true friendship is. pls treat urself with the same kindness u give to everyone else. asking for help isnt being selfish and it isnt letting anyone down. u do not have to shine for everyone else while being blind urself. following u has been a wild ride from the day i first found ur blog and ive enjoyed every day since. this year i hope the world becomes a bright and beautiful place for you.

@bobohu elaine, im not sure who you want following you since u changed ur blog...i think u left while i was taking a break from tumblr, but i found you again from a post about the kinds of love you feel for exo, i knew there was only one person who writes like that, so beautifully and so full of love. you were one of the first exo blogs i followed and you have always been someone who radiates good vibes and sunshine. i want u to know i appreciate every one of ur positivity posts, and even in your selfies, your smile, you look exactly how i would expect from the kind of cute content you have. i want to genuinely thank you for being a fan for so long and doing what u can to make others happy. i love seeing your posts and im very happy i found you again

@boxianb ive been following u for so long and like idk how u do it but u reblog every single baekhyun post i have on my blog without fail. always. u r just all baekhyun all the time and u know what i admire that i respect that so much that is dedication and i see u and appreciate that, its exactly what i want and need in my life, thank you !!

@byunchen mel, ive seen your posts lately and how you are lonely and missing friends on here, and ive been following you for like...two years now..and we don’t really talk, im shy and you say ur shy and bad at talking.... but here’s me saying that i see you and i appreciate the time you spend on here blogging and talking. im not really active enough anymore to promise to interact a lot but this year i will try to talk more and i wish you many adorable anons and people to call friends !! thank u for coming this far and being an important part of my dash

@exolgbt around when i first followed u i was questioning a lot if i was actually a lesbian and somehow ur blog just like...comforted me ? made me feel good ? helped me try to understand myself ? seeing someone so proudly a lesbian and also so in love with exo... ive come to terms with being bisexual but i admire you and really love your content and all the exo mlm appreciation !! ur doing good work <3

@imagine-baekhyun i dont know who is running this account but ur literally ruining my life thanks i hate it !!!!!!

@kjonginswife i have to admit ive wanted to talk to u for a while alkjgslkjg its nice to see someone my own age on here, i did see ur universe reaction and i think youre adorable haha i dont follow a lot of non-bbh stans and honestly i think i followed you at first by mistake but i have never regretted it !! idk how to put it into eloquent words but basically u give me such good friendly vibes and i love seeing your posts and your tags and your personality and just know someone on here really appreciates you and would miss you if u left

@kkaeb-my-song one of the holy first baekhyun blogs i followed <3 from the beginning you struck me as a very sweet person so cutely in love with baekhyun and that hasn’t changed, ive only come to appreciate you even more. you’re a constant on here and being in this fandom wouldn’t be the same without you !!

@mochibaeks I LOVE YOU i know youre not as active lately jelly but I LOVE YOU youre like the sweetest cutest squishiest most adorable person ive seen on this site i just...love...everything you say and make!! im p sure i first followed u bc u did like the bias audio challenge a while ago...u sounded so friendly and adorable, ur voice is very fitting for you haha you are so warm i hope you stick around for a long time because i love you soooo much

@rosybbh ive been following u sophia for a while and we’re mutuals but we havent talked a lot and im still honestly intimidated by you lol idk how u feel about this view but i see you as a very strong person, just the way u talk seems confident in some way to me, whether u feel like that or not. i dont really have the right words, but i admire that. i LOVE everything u say about bbh...all ur posts for bbh n about u n bbh...damn u always got me daydreaming about him too :( except ok there was this one pic of chanyeol and u said smth like ‘imagine him manspreading’ and id like u to know that that actually ruined my life and i havent forgotten it so thanks. for u especially i hope u have a very bright and healing year

@r-velvets vivian i know u have been gone recently but still lurk, and u have one of my fave blogs content wise and gifs and personality. u r still like THAT way too cool mutual i get so excited to see...especially bc you’re also so kind and during that really hard night after the news of Jonghyun, idk how or why but just those few words u said made me feel a lot better. i miss you online but i hope youre doing well in your real life and finding happiness

@sefuns i dont have a lot to say bc im really shy but u were the FIRST exo blog i ever followed and you have given nothing but great content since i found you two years ago, and when u followed me more recently i could not believe the notification aglksjgljk i have no idea how u found me but knowing we’re mutuals made me very happy and gave me a little blush and i just wanted to let u know that

@thundaelights fey, i dont think this will mean much to you coming from a stranger, but after following you for two years, i feel like i know you some, and i want to say that i hope this year you see many beautiful sights, and your heart feels light, and you are surrounded by things that give happiness. i hope something happens soon that makes the whole world look different, look brighter. its funny how life can change so fast and without warning. i wish you not just strength but also a safe place to fall apart and hope to put yourself back together. may you find countless reasons to smile

@wangeun we talked a lot for a while and then i just kind of disappeared i think as i often do rip but i still love following you and i just want to say real quick that i see you and i notice you and i would miss you if you left and i hope youre finding a lot of success in your life

to new mutuals @cuddlyjd @okaybaekhyun @baekhyuns i still get so shy and happy when anyone follows me back but thank you !! you are all three cute and adorable and funny n kenzie i hadnt followed a great jongdae stan in a while since the old dae-biased blogs i followed became inactive thank u for loving jongdae so well alkgjs

@sebyun @winterbyuns @etherealbbh @progamerbyun @dearbyun @baeksee @byunvoyage @solobaek @queenbyun @baekhyy @baehkhun @ethereal-baek i love all of u bbh stans giving baekhyun the love and adoration he deserves n giving me the positive baekhyun content my heart needs. esp solobaek (kiki, right?) u have the cutest most wonderful tags i love reading them all and seeing so many heart emojis

im sorry i dont have the most to say but im thinking of you all and wishing you the best!!!!

#sry if u dont even know me lol i mostly lurk rather than actually talk #happy new year!!!!#p

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