#or wanting to draw big ideas but then its like oh god its gonna take so long and if i dont do it all in one sitting i might die

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[cainware]

Something so satisfying about the idea of Jason moving out of Gotham and moving in with Kyle in NY after all the drifting from place to place, self-discovery, and the death of his best friend. (Oh lord here we go, Jay's gonna write a half-baked fic again):

It's a shitty apartment, but Kyle offers up what little space he has to give Jason a home, because God knows the man needs a place to call home now. The closest thing he had to call home in a person is dead, or a family that doesn't even really see him as a person half the time so much as a problem to be fixed or contained; Kyle doesn't expect to take that place or be anything excessively important, but he does have a couch and a few extra cups of instant noodles he can share.

And then Jason lives there. He's been there for a month, and Kyle is noticing changes. Jason isn't anything like what Kyle expected when he first met him years ago; he calm, he's quiet, he's smart. He's multidimensional, and that never really rang true until Kyle noticed Jason seemed comfortable enough to let his guard down.

Kyle also notices other changes. Such as a lack of being hounded about rent by the landlord, an increase in actual food in the apartment, and a stack of books that used to occupy the floor on an actual bookshelf. He debates asking a lot of the time, but he never finds the right way. Instead, he leaves it alone for a year.

The year rounds out. Kyle finally asks, because his entire apartment doesn't look half as bad as it did when Jason moved in. He finds Jason in the kitchen, cooking, and the whole place smells like Kyle's childhood. Spices that make his nose tickle and his mouth water fill the air, and he finds Jason leaned against the counter, scrolling through his phone with one hand and stirring the pot on the stove with the other. He's humming, a tune Kyle can't place but recognizes, somehow.

"Hey, Jay?" Kyle starts, eyeing his roommate as Jason looks up and, be still his beating heart, smiles at him.

"Oh, hey." Jason says, putting his phone down on the counter. He's giving Kyle his full attention, a gesture he usually reserves for important conversation. "I would've texted you about dinner, but y'know. I kinda just started."

"Nah, that's fine." Kyle says, waving off the statement. "I did want to talk to you, though. About uh... the apartment?" He doesn't miss the way Jason's shoulders tense, the way his jaw sets. He curses himself as he realizes how that must have sounded, knowing Jason must be expecting the worst now.

"Sure. Let me just-" Jason says, turning to knock the heat on the stove top down to low. Kyle watches him, the way his fingers just slightly falter with the knob. He's nervous.

"Its nothing bad, Jay." Kyle says quickly, and almost as if he's said some magic word, Jason visibly relaxes. His hand draws back from the stove dial slowly, and he turns to look at Kyle. "Its just... have you been paying the backrent? And... all the furniture and the food- Jay, I can't afford to pay you back."

"Whoa, whoa, slow your roll, bud! Who said anything about paying me back?" Jason asks, furrowing his eyebrows as he leans back against the counter. "Dude, you're letting me live here, and between your day job and running around doing... whatever it is Lanterns do, I don't know your life, you don't exactly make the big bucks. The least I can do is help you keep your shithole in your hands. And respectfully, after week three, if I had to eat one more cup of shrimp-flavored noodles, I was gonna murder you in your sleep."

"Jason." Kyle sighs, tucking his hands in his pockets as he eyes the floor. "Thanks, man. I've been stressing out for a year now about where in God's name I was gonna find the means to pay you back for this."

"And now you can rest easy, dreamboat. Now, do you or do you not want me to finish dinner before the game? I'm not gonna sit here and listen to you bitch about missing anything again." Jason warns, lifting the spoon out of the pot to wave at Kyle in a mock-threat.

"Right, right. Let the chef work his magic, and we all go to ved happy." Kyle laughs, holds up his hands defensively as he moves to leave the kitchen area. He pauses then, leaning into the room again to eye Jason. "Oh, and Jay?"

"Hm?" Jason doesn't look up, eyes focused on his methodical stirring. Kyle grins to himself, deciding that if Jason is so comfortable with him as to call him fucking dreamboat directly to his face, he may as well enjoy it.

"You make a great housewife, sweetheart." He ducks just as a knife flies into the wallpaper beside his head, laughing as he scrambles away from the kitchen as a flurry of yelling in the heaviest Gotham accent he's ever heard barrels out the door after him.

"I'm so poisoning your food, Rayner!"

[midnight-omega]

Anatomy hc

Okiii ur girl spent most of last night trying to figure some things out and draw some diagrams fr

This post focuses on the reproductive anatomy of my omegaverse. I'm gonna go through each of the 6 gender/dynamic combinations and give a little info about how I think it all works :> like everything else this varies from person to person so if this isn't ur thing no worries! If this is ur thing feel free to use it! But if you use my diagrams I'd appreciate it if you credited me be i spent a long time on them 😔

I also want to link this very in depth explanation because I did take a lot of inspiration from it for my male omegas! I adore this concept for them and I'll be using it going forward. The author talks about a lot more tho some of which imma steal some of which Im not :))

Okay lets get into it fr, be warned there are my messy diagrams of all kinds of private bits under the cut. Also if tumblr kills the quality im so sorry fr :((

Male Alpha

🌕 Let's start with our boys here.

🌕 Honestly they're pretty straightforward! There's not too many crazy anatomy changes here. They function pretty much the same as irl amab anatomy does.

🌕 They have a penis and external testes

🌕 They have a prostrate that can be stimulated via anal penetration

🌕 Male alphas tend to be on the bigger side concerning length/girth but this varies from person to person

🌕 Now, the defining characteristic of a male alpha is their knot. Only alphas have a knot!

🌕 The knot is soft tissue that expands during orgasm. This "locks" the penis into the vagina in order to facilitate conception. In simple terms, sperm stuck inside better change pregananant

🌕 The knot typically stays expanded for about 20min after orgasm, but this can vary. Any longer than an hour though, can be cause for concern

🌕 The male alpha usually has a larger knot than a female alpha and experiences higher chances of successfully "tying" (tying here meaning the knot actually gets stuck in the receiver)

🌕 An alpha can knot outside of rut, but these knots may be smaller or not fully expanded since they're lacking the overproduction of hormones that rut creates

🌕 A deflated knot is still visible as a ring of much softer tissue than the rest of the shaft

Female Alpha

🌕 oh boy, oh god, mother mary save us all

🌕 This one was so HARD to figure out fr... let me get into this

🌕 I've always liked the idea of a female alpha having a hidden penis best. One that's concealed where the clit ought to be but expands and pops out during rut or when aroused. I like this one best bc I'm not a super big fan of the anatomy set up of having a vulva and dick and balls all at once, and anatomically I never understood like... the concept of the clit swells a lil and thats the knot bc... penetrate how?? I also just don't like pregnant female alphas much! To me alphas impregnate only not carry

🌕 So hidden penis was my favorite option !

🌕 But once I started drawing out the diagram I immediately had problems placing the sheathed penis inside the body

🌕 My biggest issues were the bladder and pubic bone. The bladder I can move around easy enough, especially since female and male anatomy have it in slightly different positions anyway

🌕 But what was fucking me up was that damn bone

🌕 If we want to replace the clit with a penis the penis is going to need to run straight through that bone. The pubic bone in female anatomy sits right above the clit basically. In male anatomy its a tad higher up but even moving it up it would still be in the way of the penis

🌕 I could continue to move the bone or do away with it but then we compromise the human shape of the female alpha. The rest of the dynamics would look human in the hips and pelvis but female alpha she'd be.. little fucked up. Not to mention I'm sure there's some other wild medical consequence of removing or moving the pubic bone that I'm not aware of

🌕 So... we can't put the sheathed penis exactly where the clit is

🌕 I could put it where the vagina is, but then that eliminates the vagina entirely and makes female alphas unable to have penetrative sex and tbh I'm not into that give her a gspot yk?

🌕 I could move the urethra around, like push it forward towards the clit even more and push the vaginal opening backwards, or even combine the vagina and anus like the male omega but I wasn't a fan of that either. It makes her feel to male omega-y and less unique to me

🌕 Furthermore like... vaginas are low. Like lower than u think, clits are a little lower too. And penises are so high! So.. having a penis come out so low between your legs wouldn't that make penetrating kinda hard unless you had a crazy long horse cock or smth.

🌕 So I ended up keeping the penis sheathed like I wanted, but I moved it up

🌕 The penis head is a little above where a clit would sit but I still removed the clit from her anatomy

🌕 To avoid the bone I had to put the penis above it. This isn't super crazy since the vans deferens also comes down over the bone, but it is a little awkward because this isn't a little tube this is a PENIS. This is a whole long cord of tissue and blood vessels here and I'm not giving her a small flat cock to compensate she doesn't deserve that

🌕 So, her muscle, fat, skin, and what have you is gonna have to push out to make room for the penis sitting above the bone.

🌕 Insert female alpha sheath bulge >:))

🌕 tbh I think giving her a bit of a bump is pretty hot so I'm satisfied!

🌕 However bc its sitting right over a bone any pressure applied to it is going to be uncomfortable or even painful for her

🌕 So... ig if you wanna kick a female alpha in the nuts aim for her sheath fr

🌕 So then I was good for awhile, I had placed the penis in the body in a way that satisfied me and kept the vagina intact

🌕 But okay now the penis has to come out

🌕 The female alpha cock still sits lower than the male one, so we have to do a little more bending to get it to flip up in proper penis formation

🌕 No problem, I'll just give the female a longer base after the knot and said base will be way more bendy than a real penis np np

🌕 Okay but... if we have a noodle base how is the erection staying erect and not just becoming a top heavy string of stuck blood that flops tf over

🌕 Insert what I did with the labia

🌕 I want female alphas to enjoy vaginal sex if they want to mostly for kinky reasons yk but its my world so!

🌕 But this means that I don't really wanna touch the labia around the vagina, they should still get looser during arousal they should still be fun to play with yada yada yada

🌕 But the penis needs something to lock it upright. So I split the labia into even more parts.

🌕 On irl afab anatomy theres the inner and outer labia and that's that. On the female alpha tho I had to get creative. I gave her her inner and outer labia that would function normally

🌕 Then I gave her another set around the exit of her sheath. I called them! The penile labia for lack of creativity and anatomical knowledge! Unlike the outer and inner labia around the vagina, these ones stiffen and lock up during arousal after the penis has been unleashed. This keeps it out and helps it stand!

🌕 I also gave her a middle labia. This is an extremely tough piece of muscle that separates her upper and lower sets of lips. The middle labia supports our bendy base even more and tends to get engorged and may even expand a little to support the weight of the cock and knot

🌕 This isn't fool proof by ANY means and I'm sure ppl who know anatomy better than me have a million issues rn but yk what? This makes sense to me and took me awhile to figure it out fr so I'm content

🌕 Now... I gave her a uterus-like structure and still called it "uterus" for lack of better term. this is not a functioning uterus so female alphas cannot conceive

🌕 But in this model I have this uterus act more like a muscle that helps push the penis out of the sheath. Believable? Idk but its chill with me

🌕 The female knot is generally a littler smaller than the male knot because it's gotta fit in the body

🌕 The knot here doesn't even begin to expand until the penis is unsheathed, whereas in males it may puff up slightly on initial arousal

🌕 Since I did not give her balls, her testes are inside the body where the ovaries would typically be

🌕 insert the part where I tell you alpha sperm does not need to be cool. It can survive higher temperatures which also makes sense considering omegas practically have heat strokes during heat, the sperm would need to be a little tougher.

🌕 But then why do males have balls? I got u fam ! Bc while they can survive in warmer temperatures that does not mean they thrive there. The healthiest swimmers are still kept a little cooler. Female alphas may be less fertile even because of this which could be some fun plot points bc i love female alphas pls write them more

🌕 That was so LONG but I think that's it for her

Male Beta

🌙 The male beta doesn't really have anything super atypical from irl amab bodies.

🌙 The penis of a beta tends to be a lil smaller than an alpha's but bigger than an omegas, but again this isn't always the case!

🌙 We do have a prostate for fun anal times if desired

🌙 Beta sperm is not as heat resistant as alpha sperm. They can impregnate other betas just fine but may struggle with an omega in heat. It's suggested that b/o couples try conceiving outside of heat with the help of fertility experts :>

🌙 Male betas cannot conceive, they have no uterus or vagina

🌙 Betas do not knot!

Female Beta

🌙 Again, not a lot of differences to talk about here, typical afab anatomy

🌙 It is worth noting that in my verse I am not giving female betas periods bc thats mean

🌙 For this reason their endometrium is thinner than ours so the body can reabsorb it without a true heat easier

🌙 I'll also say that beta eggs are just built different for this thinner endometrium

🌙 usually you need a certain thickness for the egg to embed properly to the uterine wall, but imma say that for whatever reason beta eggs are totally chill with a thin lining. They have a better grip or smth ig!

🌙 This allows my girls to get pregnant without an extra added issue due to my silly anatomy choices

🌙 It also makes her different from the female omega which I'll talk about later :))

Male Omega

🌑 Okay ya'll get ready for shitshow number two

🌑 actually the male omega wasn't as bad to figure out mostly bc I stole the idea of the epivagina from the author I linked above the cut!!

🌑 I'll sum up if you don't want to read through the link (you should tho it's really interesting stuff you might wanna use in ur own verse!)

🌑 So like the female alpha there are depictions I don't like when it comes to the male omega. I don't like them not having a uterus and just being... a guy? Like having nothing about them that makes them different than a male beta. Also, like how I said I don't like pregnant alphas, I don't like omegas that can impregnate.

🌑 I'm also not a fan of not giving them a penis and having them only have a vagina and uterus. What makes the two omega genders different then? Breasts? Not a fan tbh considering I like my male omegas to breastfeed with their lil pregnancy boobies (cancer in venus I like boobies and lactation not sorry)

🌑 Basically I want my mpreg and I want my penis too

🌑 So, like the female alpha, we have to give them both parts.

🌑 Since there's not a ton of room between the balls and the anus (the taint is only so big yall) I'm not a fan of just giving them a vulva here

🌑 I'm also not a big fan of the birth canal that develops from the taint when pregnant just bc it doesn't make sense to me that the body just forms and unforms a hole that they have to push out a baby the size of a small melon through. Like in that case pregnancy must be excruciatingly painful on top of pregnancy already being painful and hard

🌑 So... butt babies. Except not quite

🌑 The popular option is the cloaca but... I have issues with that too

🌑 If you read the chapter on male omegas on the ao3 link you can see why. A short cloaca definitely results in poop in the vagina. I don't think I need to explain why poop in the vagina is like the worst thing. As the author points out it also makes it difficult for fun oral time just bc the amount of infections you can get from... constant ass licking/fucking especially bc I haven't seen any male omegas telling their alphas omg wait i need to shower, shit, and have an enema first

🌑 The long cloaca can work ig but then the penis never enters the vagina and thats just not fun. The male omega would never be able to have vaginal sex fr :((

🌑 So I'm going with what the author made up! The epivagina!

🌑 The epivagina is a strong valve-like muscle kinda like the middle labia in alpha females.

🌑 During non horny times the epivagina remains positioned in a way that closes off the vaginal opening. No penetration without literal tearing can take place with it closed. The anus is open and free for poop!

🌑 During heat and arousal the epivagina switches the other way opening the vagina and closing the anus so the opposite is true

🌑 You do not have to be in heat for the vagina to open btw! Just turned on

🌑 During birth we can just assume the sphincters and muscles around this anus and vagina were built for stretching, though it might be recommend for male omegas to anal train a bit to get all our muscles ready for it (there are literally butt plugs the size of a child's head so we can train out asses a lil)

🌑 Now the drawback to this would be that... you cannot have anal with a male omega if he's turned on. Tbh that's okay with me since i'm not really into anal anyway! If it's not okay with u then.. idk change it to fit ur kink babe im not stopping u

🌑 It also kinda acts as a rape defense too in a way.... like a duck if we're not turned on good luck entering the vagina. ofc... the exception to this is heat in heat it's p much always open unless we need to shit rn so ig vaginal rape protection in heat isn't a thing but it's neat outside of heat

🌑 Male omegas do produce very small amounts of sperm but they're such sad little boys it's basically impossible to get pregnant from them. Most of them have clear orgasms if they come from their cocks at all.

🌑 I did raise their balls a bit back into the body. We're still descended but not... exactly the whole way if that makes sense. Our sperm just isn't as cool this way and it's not heat resistant fr!

🌑 Bc omegas get so hot during their heats this can also decrease or fully kill off any remaining sperm production.

🌑 Technically this way you can still get pregnant by a male omega if you're a female beta/omega but.... bc its my verse and I don't really want that I'm gonna say it happens like once in a century it is not really a thing

🌑 The penis here is smaller than anyone else's, but not as small as you'd think. I'm not going the whole micropenis route with them you can still be satisfied through penetration with my male omegas!

🌑 Like the author, I also like the concept of giving them a prostate and an internal clit >:))

🌑 no real reason other than 3 ways for my boys to orgasm and I like it

Female Omega

🌑 Pretty similar to the female beta, not too much difference from irl afab anatomy

🌑 The biggest difference between a female beta and female omega are:

🌑 Slick production (beta's do not produce slick)

🌑 The endometrium

🌑 I gave my beta's a thinner one so their bodies can absorb it and we can avoid menstruation!

🌑 Well in female omegas the endometrium is thicker, about the same as the average one irl or maybe even a little thicker than that.

🌑 Her eggs just aren't as good as gripping just like irl fr, so we need a lot of cushion for them

🌑 especially since female omegas tend to release more than one egg a cycle (2-4 is normal) so if we're all embedding we need more room to do it

🌑 A female omega also can reabsorb her endometrium no worries I am not giving her a period either

🌑 Instead I'm going to say that heat has 3 phases. Pre heat where we get ready for ovulation that lasts about 3-4 days, heat heat which lasts about 1-2 days or less. This is when we are fertile we need to get pregnant NOW, and then post heat which lasts about 3 days where our body temperature is still extremely high and we're still horny and feverous but the egg has passed alas. Its during post heat that we reabsorb and break down the endometrium. Sometimes we might see a little blood a lil spotting yk, but for the most part our heat stroke helps us absorb it idc if that's unreasonable its what imma say

🌑 The term heat usually includes heat and post heat but not pre heat (I mean you get off work for heat and post heat and we use the term heat as a collective to include that 5 or so days but this doesn't include the pre heat) but i'll do a different post for heats later !

I think thats everything if you survived all that thank you for indulging me fr! Feel free to pop in my askbox if you wanna talk about smth and like I said in the beginning feel free to steal but pls credit my diagrams if u use them :))

[quicksilverdrabbles]

Khash: *running away from wolves just outside of Riverwood, bow broken and out of arrows* I'm so dead I'm so dead- *shrieks, a wolf snapping at her ankles just barely out of reach* Leave me alone! I am almost positive I don't taste good!

Saturn: *whistles, catching the wolves' attention* 'Ey! Leave the kid alone, ya' tuskin' mongrels! *draws her bow as the wolves turn, downing one with a glass arrow*

Khash: Whoa..

Saturn: *turns and launches a containment sphere into the pack, releasing a Dwarven Venator and letting it kill the rest* Phew. *hops down from the ledge she'd perched on, jogging towards Khash with a worried smile* Hey, kid. You okay?

Khash: I-I... I'm fine.. *staring up at Saturn with starry eyes* ... You are very strong.

Saturn: *chuckles* Y'think so? Quite the compliment from such a brave warrior. What're you doing out here?

Khash: I was hunting... What is that? *points at the Venator, quite literally ripping a wolf apart*

Saturn: Oh, that? That's my... *turns to look at it, seeing the mess it made* Oh for Gods' sake, we talked about this. *returns the Venator to its containment sphere* Sorry, it's a bit restless. Haven't gotten a chance to use that one in a while.

Khash: Do you have more of those things??

Saturn: Automatons? Yes, I do.

Khash: How do they work? They really just listen to everything you want them to do?? *gasps, seeing her longsword strapped to her back* Is that your sword?! Why is it so big???

Saturn: *smoke rising from her ears, overwhelmed by the questions, remembering why she doesn't do kids* High Elves need bigger swords than humans. Longer limbs.

Khash: Are you an adventurer?? You have to be, right?!

Saturn: I am, yes.

Khash: Can I come with you???

Saturn: *freezes, staring down at the child with a look of shock* Absolutely not.

Khash: What?! Why not?

Saturn: I'm not going to risk bringing a kid with me. It's dangerous.

Caryalind: Saturn??

Saturn: *looks over her shoulder* Oh, hey guys. Took you long enough.

Kaidan: *hunched over, panting* Gods you're too fast- Where did ye go?

Gore: Uh. And what's with the kid?

Khash: *hiding behind Saturn*

Saturn: Uh.. She was being chased by wolves.

Khash: *staring at Caryalind and Kaidan with a look of shock* Is everyone in your group super tall??

Saturn: Hah. No, just look at Gore.

Gore: Hey!

Kaidan: Well, best we get her home then, ey? I've never seen an Argonian child in Riverwood, though.

Khash: I am a mercenary.

Saturn: ...

Gore: ...

Kaidan: ...

Caryalind: I beg your pardon?

Khash: I am! I can fight very well with a bow!

Saturn: Not.. that I doubt that, kiddo, but where are your parents?

Khash: Dead.

Saturn: (Shit.) Er- a guardian?

Khash: Also dead.

Saturn: ... Yeah y'know what I'm just gonna stop asking questions right now.

Khash: So.. can I go with you? Please? I promise I will not get in the way!

Caryalind: Saturn. A word. *tugs on Saturn's arm and pulls her away, speaking in a hushed voice* You cannot seriously be considering this??

Saturn: Who said I was?! That kid's better off being taken care of, not getting dragged all across Skyrim!

Gore: Not like we can just leave her here, though. A kid by herself is far worse off than a kid with a band.

Caryalind: You would know.

Gore: Yeah, and you wouldn't.

Saturn: Boys, please focus.

Gore: I say let her come. If she decides it's too much, she can leave with no more said.

Caryalind: It's outrageous! Kaidan, please be the voice of reason here.

Kaidan: *already getting along with Khash, checking out her bow* Don't worry yourself none about it, lass. Saturn's a great smith, she'll make ya' a new one.

Khash: Awesome!

Caryalind: *deadpan* Absolutely no help.

Saturn: Look, how about this. *takes Caryalind by the shoulders and faces him towards her* We bring her along, then the second we get a chance we bring her to Riften.

Caryalind: I can't help but feel like that's a worse idea.

Saturn: Have any better ideas?

Caryalind: ... No.

Saturn: And there we go. *pulls away, walking back towards Khash* Alright, kid, you can come. Let's bring you to meet the others.

Khash: Tusk yea!!!

Saturn: Pfft. That's some mouth, kiddo.

Caryalind: Like any of you are any better.

Saturn: Rude.

~

Khash: *Meeko laying in her lap, petting him happily as she listens to stories from Inigo*

Taliesin: *sitting some ways away with Saturn* You are absolutely insane.

Saturn: You're not the first today to tell me that.

Taliesin: It's one thing to just bring her to an orphanage outright, but it's a cruelty even I can't stomach to lie and say she can come with us.

Saturn: She would have fled if we did tell her.

Taliesin: Why bring her along in the first place, then?

Saturn: Kids shouldn't be that young and out on their own. She deserves a safe place.

Taliesin: And are you so sure that orphanage is a safe place? There have been unsettling rumors..

Saturn: ... *sighs, watching Khash interact with her family with a frown* We'll just have to see.

[actually-a-fish]

The Mitchells vs. The Machines

Hello! I like watching movies. Ideas get stuck in my head while watching them and i need them out of my brain. This is my 4/9/24 viewing of The Mitchells vs. The Machines. I like cartoons :)

This will have spoilers

Without further ado... my thoughts chronologicall

PROLONGED EYE CONTACT DODODODOD

The main VA is Abbie Jacobson (aka Princess Tiabeanie Mariabeanie de la Rochambeau Grunkwitz)

this family reminds me so much of mine minus depression and a commitment to a cult :)

girl its probably a good thing you weren't at the tech reveal. be nice to the siris, alexas and echos in your life...

i kinda wanna watch that robot movie with Will Smith and hot robots now

THEY ALL HAVE STIMS GUYS

running away from your crush and saying you hate them is so real

"what are these? robutts?"

HES TAKING NOTES

I like that the new genre of villian is a tech bro and AI

I dont like this bit about wifi, we are dependent on it yeah but people can adapt pretty well. Well some I guess.

why do dads always suggest eating the family pet?

i cannot express how autistic this family is. its constant, not demeaning or the butt of a joke. just a family being a family. I have flappy hands about it.

aww dads do love to teach their kids to drive stick shift

i do like Eric and Barbara

the robots are shooting the humans into space, that's their plan and honestly i've been saying we should shoot garbage into space for a while now so im glad somone is finally doing it

there are cute edits done by katie through the whole movie and they deserve a shout out

I knew touch screen fridges were a bad idea

NOT FURBYS WTF WHY THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE

"your whole lives i wanted to save you from disater and this is the moment ive been waiting for" - Rick (and also my father)

KATIE DRAWS ON HER HANDS TOO OMG THE DETAILS. THERE IS SO MUCH STIMMING AND IT MAKES ME HAPPY EVERY TIME

This is good family bonding, but no tears yet.

unfortunately i think the family bonding was to good. The dad left a sentimental object in katies bags and now im convinced hes gonna sacrifice himself to save the rest of the family.

now im crying. :) if you watched i bet you could guess which part.

oof crying again! a Twofer!

This movie may be healing my childhood trauma. I miss my parents. They were just doing their best

THE CALL BACKS. THE CULMANATION! ITS MAKING ME EMOTIONAL IM SORRY

thank you game grumps for introducing me to the song "Walk the Dinosaur" by Was (not was)

An accurate compilation of watching my coworkers and professors use computers

uh oh they got little brother, Linda is gonna rip out someone's heart

OH MY GOD I JUST THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA GET MAD

ERIC AND BARBARA SUPREMECY

damn i need to see my family so i can remember why i hate them bc this is to sweet for me

TEAM E AND B! TEAM E AND B!

How long of a break between the entire world being abducted by robots and everyone going back to work was? Do you think this was like their pandemic

"My name is Monchi, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair"

THEYRE BASED ON A REAL FAMILY (and the whole family has "im easily overstimulated" hair cuts, its so relatable)

It's cheesy. full of stuff you know is meant for kids and that corporate made them do. but I really liked it. I know the whole bit is that the family is weird. I don't really like that they used the word weird instead of autistic but i can kinda understand why they had to do it. i found myself relating the characters constantly. The way they run away when things get overwhelming, communicate through their interests, stim when they have big feelings (they all have their own, and most of them have a couple they do) and the way the situation their in affects them. It is not perfect representation but it did a good enough job for me.

If you read all the way through thank you! If you have any formatting tips please lmk!

Also I feel the silly need to add, this is all my opinion, and my opinion is not fact! It's okay if we don't agree and if you're nice, I would love to hear about it :)

[morroodle]

Towards the end of day 4 of top surgery recovery and figured I'd share how it's going. Idk if this can help anyone else but its at least going to help me. Prepare for out of order chaos

The pain isn't too bad! Like yea it hurts but I got used to it and I can take pain meds to help

Getting out of bed is a pain in the ass though. Going from laying down to sitting up is HARD (it's definitely not because I have no abs)

Speaking of pain: the drains. They don't hurt by themselves but when I shift wrong and they tug? Not fun. Not sure how to explain it but pinching isn't inaccurate

Drain fluid. Does not smell good. It's not a very strong smell and you get used to it pretty fast but it's still not fun

I also. Do not smell good. God I can't wait to shower

My mom spilled the drain fluid on me. Twice. Ew.

It's fuckn ITCHY. Always just below where I can reach through the bandages. I am going to kill someone.

Other itches are annoying too. They may not be covered by bandages but with such limited mobility it's annoying. I got a back scratcher but those don't help much when you can barely move your arms

I've probably been moving more than I'm supposed to

Love it when I move wrong and suddenly there's pain and a very suspicious warm feeling and I can't check to see what's wrong because of the bandages

Bendy straw my beloved <333 the $20 ninjago cup I got from legoland is finally making itself worth it

The first day I was incredibly nauseous. I could barely sit up for a few minutes, much less stand. Made eating dinner... not easy.

Day 2 I was feeling great! Even touched some grass!

Day 3 morning: nearly threw up when changing my shirt. I didn't but oh god it was not fun. I've never been nauseous like that before, I was hot inside but my skin was cold and my mom said the color very literally drained from my face. Made me stuck in a chair for like 20 minutes until I could stomach going back to bed.

I'm fine now (probably)

I've been enjoying being taken care of. I'm lucky enough to have a very good support system and I appreciate it. I also appreciate always getting my pic of food >:D

God I want a hug. I'm gonna get so squished once I'm healed and I fully accept my fate

Mentioning again my hatred for the drains. I was very scared of them going into this, I didn't like the idea of having tubes both in and out of my body. I don't really care about that now, I don't see it and I've gotten used to it, but god they are so annoying

I'm not nearly as tired as I was expecting! Sure I'm a bit sleeper than normal but it's really not that bad.

I'm bored

I wanna draw ;-; I havent had motivation or ideas for weeks but the moment it becomes inconvenient? Release the floodgates!

I haven't actually noticed the lack of boobs much yet. Maybe it's because they're still bandaged and I can't see or maybe it's because I live in my mastectomy pillow but I haven't really had a rush of emotions yet

It's kinda weird. I was expecting to feel so much but everything so far just feels so... normal? It's not normal but I've gotten used to it. Its like I'm waiting for my emotions to catch up

That being said there is one thing I've noticed and definitely felt things about. I had a pretty big chest and there used to be quite a dip between them and now there's just... nothing. It's flat. I'm sure this is just a fraction of what I'll feel when I get the bandages off for the first time but this tiny bit that I can see and feel right now is... wow. It's weird. God I can't wait for the rest of it

That's all I can think of for now, I'll keep yall updated on how things go from here and hopefully this can help someone! I know most of this has been complaining but I am not trying to discourage anyone from this, I've just only experienced the bad parts so far. I'm sure I'll make a similar post listing all the positives once I get there but for now things aren't very fun

[moosecow]

UNPOPULAR OPINION TIME!

Ten things I wish would just DIE already…

10. Miraculous Ladybug

Before you sharpen your pitchforks! Hear me out! I actually REALLY like this show…but GOD It is the BIGGEST tease I have EVER seen! Marinette and Adrien should have gotten together at the end of the first season, and maybe we could have explored their relationship, given them more depth? Raised the stakes instead of the CONANT. ENDLESS. FILLER. Of absolute nothing that is this show. We all know they’re going to get together, just rip the bandaid and let us move on. I’ve never seen a show jerk its fan base around so much!

9. Avatar the Last Air Bender

Again, I LOVE THIS SHOW, SO, SO MUCH! But I can tell that they’re now turning this into a cash cow. I don’t want to see another avatar show, especially after what they did with Legend of Korra. What made Avatar so special was that, yes there was a lot going on in their world, but it never stopped focusing on the core cast, their development, their relationships, and their reactions to the world they live in. Korra just gave us more and more characters instead of focusing on the ones we had, and it lost me with its overcomplicated plot, and I fear legend of Genji, AND the live action remake (which already has alarm bells going up because it’s live action and when has worked out well?) Can we just…revive an old gem on Nickelodeon? Or make something new and substantial instead of relying on SpongeBob reruns?

8. Dragon Ball

Yes, another show I like! But MAN! How many power-ups can we go through before it gets old! Even ASH finally reached his goal in pokemon! There’s so much content here, and I’m grateful for that! I don’t mind more games and merchandise, but enough of the show! It’s clear that only Goku and Vegeta are the only characters capable of beating the big enemy, and no one cares much for the younger characters taking over. But at this point their not that interesting. ESPECIALLY Goku. He’s just a guy that likes fighting. Vegeta was more interesting with his reformed villain arc, but he is constantly overshadowed by his dumber super-saiyen. It feels like they’ve exhausted all their stories….

7. Velma

I’m gonna barf. Seriously, all people do is complain about this show. Can we just, STOP? Review bombing it, complaining about it, making reaction videos to it, is just…feeding it at this point. If all of us hate so much! So many shows that deserved to be watched and enjoyed were completely ignored and faded away from the public consciousness, but not this one, at least, not yet. I see video and video about it! Ignore it. Let it die like it’s supposed to! And now I will never mention it again, and neither should you!

6. Marvel

It’s not so much as I want this franchise to die…more like…I think we need a break! It’s been like 20 years of non stop Marvel and I feel like we already peaked with the Avengers Endgame. Besides Moon Knight and Wakanda Forever, all I’ve seen is general dislike of all the new stuff coming out. I know that Disney is a big conglomerate and they’re going to milk this thing for all it’s worth…but wouldn’t people enjoy it more if you let it simmer for a bit, let the ideas come back after some rest, and then get back into it?

5. 13 Reasons Why

This show should have stayed a book! Oh. My. God. As someone that struggles with mental illness, watching this get sensationalized and reduced to nothing more then teenage angst for badly written teenage characters is so gross! I don’t have much to say about it. It just makes me so angry! How do people actually like this and continue to watch and recommend it? It’s basically the same as every other “dramatic” teen show out there, but uses suicide as a hook to draw people in, which is so disrespectful! You want a show that is more mature then this and actually handles mental illness well? Watch BoJack Horseman.

4. Grey’s Anatomy

I don’t care about the relationships in this show. I don’t who broke up with who, who died, who couldn’t have a kid, who cheated on who. I cared more, in the first season at least, when they were just young surgeons, and they were dealing with the struggles of that. BUT MAN! This show quickly became a soap opera! I mean what did I expect from an ABC show. Just end it already! If you want a good show about doctor’s that focuses on their personal growth and the difficulties of the job watch House, or better yet, watch Scrubs.

3. Kingdom Hearts

This hurts. This hurts. So. Much. GOD! I love these games…but I REALLY hate the direction they’re going. KH3 was such a red flag! The story was complicated enough with time travel, the whole foretellers things, how we keep adding characters instead of focusing on the core Destiny Islands Trio, how Kairi is basically a plot device where, EVEN IN HER OWN GAME, she has to be rescued by Sora. And now, KH4 is on its way and Nomura is basically turning it into versus 13….I don’t even know anymore. Things were getting real dumb in Dream Drop Distance. I’m just going to pretend thee series ended at KH2, where the emotions were there and the story wasn’t derailed and removed of all the charm it had…Either end it…or do something actually good with it, because at this point, it’s just getting ridiculous. And this is coming from someone that loves this series with every fiber of their being.

2. Stranger Things

Yeah, Netflix will cancel actually interesting things like Inside Job, Dead End National Park, I’m not okay with this, Sense 8, and introduce stupid ideas such as removing password sharing (EVEN AFTER RAISING THE PRICE BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE PASSWORD SHARING) but they will keep things like Cuties and…this show. At this point, Stranger Things is a shadow of its former self. Not only are there no stakes, because everyone has plot armor, but it’s basically just teenage drama at this point. Remember how in Season 1, the demagorgan was actually scary? Remember how going into the upside down had health consequences? The characters just walk around now without a problem. But this show is just drama filled enough to keep the attention of the masses without actually having any substance. It makes me sad that it followed the pattern of the first season being the most interesting season and then everything going down hill from there. How did THIS show, of all shows…make me not care? What could be worse then this?

Well…

#1. Harry Potter Series

I loved this as a kid. I read this thing so many times…but now…I’m past it, and JK is just. A. Terrible. Terrible. Person…the fact that it doesn’t end with her words, that she actively gives money and supports hate groups, kind ruins the messages I learned in HP. As a kid, I thought part of the point was to be inclusive, and to make life better for people that are mistreated by the mainstream. But no. Not only were the last few movies terrible, but Rowling keeps digging that hole. Even if I wanted to, I just can’t enjoy it anymore. So, even if not everyone will. I’m going to let it die. We need another book series to inspire a generation…I just can’t with this anymore…

[bugflies00]

5. Anything you haven’t drawn yet but want to?

6. Which artists inspire you right now?

7. Favourite works of all time excluding your own?

8. What do you like most about your own work?

19. Favourite character(s) to draw?

20. What works have you drawn fanart of?

5. every day im plagued with visions i never fulfill so im just gonna unload a bunch of them onto you : finishing that clingyduo animatic, finishing the sokeefe art, maybe?? drawing roman sanders again after so long just to see??, a like proper Big dsmp tribute piece but i dont really know what, figuring out my ctechno design & drawing more c!emeraldduo and cbedrockbros, FINALLY drawing ctntduo, and a bunch of other things

ALSO specifically ANIMATIC ideas here is a list of ones that have plagued my mind for some as long as two years : burning pile (mother mother) with c!crimeboys i have had this particular one on the brain since literally early 2021 i have every frame planned out in my mind but i just cannot seem to do it, jack's lament (the nightmare before christmas) with c!wilbur THIS ONE is pretty specific but Oh it could be so cool, rasputin with c!wilbur just to have some fun, they're only human (death note the musical but specifically this version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrZolM3uCds) with c!emerald duo, money money money (ABBA) with c!beeduo this one would be very silly just antics and ctubbo being a gold digger LMAO, hang on little tomato (pink martini) with c!crimeboys OH THIS ONE LET ME TELL YOU THIS ONE HAUNTS ME IT'S SO SWEET BUT ALSO SO SAD, and finally history has its eyes on you (hamilton) with pogtopia c!crimeboys obviously because i have the illness and i never left 2020 <3

6. this is mostly mcytblr artists and some of them havent even posted since like 2021 but to name a few @/pigsteprap @/copepods @/miniaturekeytar @/wolfythewitch @/birdiebrunch @/corph1a @/somedeimi and @/winter-mornings all have really really cool art you should check out ^__^

7. my brain is fried currently so normally i would make you a list but i can only think of like. monet's nymphéas which is basic yeah but i really really like 'em. also vermeer's milkmaid . also a lot of romantic art cause its my favourite :] but im just too tired to think of examples

and also a lot of the art of the people i just listed

8. oh this is hard i dont really. mhmmm. i guess i like? my colouring? idk man

19. ill let you take a wild guess on that one

20. oh god. well obviously dsmp. otherwise sanders sides, kotlc, warrior cats, harry potter (sorryyy haven't for years though), and probably others here and there but those were the main ones

anyway keep the artist asks coming guys i really like them cause they require like proper thinking more than the other silly asks (which are also cool !! dont get me wrong)

[allfather-we-stan]

A little life update "summer 22 with no solid poo"

for anyone who cares lol

as some of you may have seen from my other social medias and here, my health has gone to pretty downhill and I want to share my story and explain bc idk

And for not to scare anyone, no its im not deadly ill. Im prob gonna be just fine.

gross warning i talk about poop

So umm this all started at the end of may- start of june when i started having diarreah. no biggie, i get anxiety diarreah like once a week so i didnt think much of it at the time. Only took me like few more weeks for straight diarreah to realize that something may be wrong lol. So i joked about it and let it be. I call this summer "Summer 22 with no solid poo" and wanted to wait till august to go to doctor. Then i got covid. So i had to wait that out before going to the hospital.

And finally the day I got to go to the doctor and everything was fine, i was supposed to get blood work tested and maybe poop in a container and the doctor thought that it might be celiac-disease bc that runs in my family. But i got fever straight as i got home. I didn't feel so good. The fever continued for a couple of days and then we decided its time to go to ER.

We went there, got bloodwork done etc. Waited there like 6 hours and finallly at 9pm the doctor had time to see me and turns out my inflammatory values were super high and that theyd like me to stay at the hospital for a while. So i stayed at the hospital for 7 days.

In those 7 days they took so much bloodwork from me it was insane! (and fun fact, turns out my veins are shit and no one can find a good spot to draw blood or put an IV tube in). For a couple of days, no answers. They had no idea whats wrong with me. My fever rise and they gave me antibiotics and other meds. Went to the ultrasound and nothing. And then, they had to give me a observation aka "put a little camera up my ass".

But bc i live in a small city theres like one doctor who does that and his schedule was full. So I had long long days waiting for my appointment. And they got me on friday.

But before we get to the camera up my ass part. Hell was loose. They had to "clean" my bowels. And they told me, and I QOUTE "It's either 1: drink two cups of this cocktail that tastes like orange juice or 2: drink 3 litres of water". Obv i took the orange juice! It cant be that bad! WRONG! JESUS CHRIST I WAS WRONG.

As soon as i drank the bad tasting orange drink, i felt like throwing up. Then the pain came. Oh god the pain. It was like level 10 menstrual cramp kind of pain. I was literally crying and screaming bc it hurt so bad. Only thing that helped at the moment was to stay still but i couldnt do that bc i had to shit out the cocktail like every 5 minutes. Many times i thought to just shit my pants on the bed and not let that be my problem. I was in so much pain I was in panic mode. And the worst thing was, no one warned me. They didn't even mention that it might hurt with some people. I don't remember all bc panic lol but i remember this one bitch ass nurse going "Duh its gonna hurt it has big chemicals in it! Even gas can hurt inside bowels". I would have punched her if I wasnt shitting at the time. Then the nurses took their sweet time to get me painkillers and nausea meds. But I couldnt take those bc i felt like throwing up. And then I remember a doctor came. He was nice and explained to me that it hurts bc the orange juice made my bowels like spasm to clean it. I was like "lol thanks for warning me beforehand". Some time goes, they give me that yummy tranquilizer trough IV and I'm high asf. It still hurt but atleast i was high. Then came the cup number 2! I tried to drink it, immeadetly i threw it up like no way that stayed down. And again, panic bc idk what happens next. Do i need to do this all again? Is my bowel clean? Am i gonna be okay? And then i passed out and slept trough the night.

And at this point, on a serious point. WHY THE FUCK IS TELLING PATIENCE THAT THIS THING X IS GONNA HURT SO FUCKING TABOO??? Like i get it, you dont want to scare people but a little heads up would be better than nothing! I just wish someone had told me.

Okay, morning comes, its friday, camera about to go up my ass. they give me nice tranquilizer again, YUMMY. Im high again. they roll me to the operation room, and the nice nurses and a doctor explains whats gonna happen. ( I knew this was gonna hurt beforehand bc they gave me the tranquilizer and figures). At this point they tell me that going up my ass is the hardest part and hurts but after that its easier. Im like okay i can do this, im high and im a big boy! So there i was, laying on my side, doctor rips hole in my underwear to put the camera up my ass. And there it goes, felt weird. Then this stinging pain comes and i curse. Nice nurse lady notices and presses against my tummy and the pain gets easier. They tell me to take a deep breath everytime the pain eases. I do. I'm breathing so good baby you wouldnt believe ( still fucking high). And that thing happens over and over again for like, maybe 3-4 minutes but felt much longer. Sometimes the pain was larger but the nice nurse always pressed my tummy and i, kind of, farted the pain out? It's weird but you get it. Then i hear the words of heaven "We are there"! THE WORST IS BEHIND. I'm happy! I turn around, look at the screen where i can somehow see ( didnt have my glasses) the inside of my bowel part. And i said "ew" and turned my head back. I dont wanna see that. it was pink. Then the doctor spoke something doctorly that i didnt understand. They spend a minute inside my ass doing... doctor stuff and then they took the camera out. It didnt hurt just felt weird, like taking a weirdly shaped long shit. And then they were like "lol we done! We gonna take these samples to the lab asap!" And I was like "you took samples?". THEY TOOK PIECES OF THE INSIDE OF MY ASS WTF.

okay its done, im still high and after couple of hours, they let me go home. I'm happy. I'm feeling good. Life was good. Untill the next morning.

I felt bad again, I threw up at night and I had a mild fever. We call the ER to ask what we do. They tell me that i havent drank enough liquids. So for the next two days I drank so much water you wont believe but i still felt bad and had a fever. So off to ER again!

We went there, they were like lol again bloodwork. At this point im sure i have no blood left. Then we waited and waited and they take some more blood and wait again. Results come back. My inflammatory values were high again. They again want me to stay at the hospital overnight. Hospital booked full. I wait. And finally its time. They take me to a 2 person room, as a 3rd guy. Like it was so cramped and I didnt even have the emergency button. Everything is overwhelming. It smelled like shit. I cried. it was a horrible experience and i can go all night about how shit it was but ill skip it at this point.

So i spend like two nights at the hospital, and they finally have the results in about the pieces of my ass they took. they dont know what it is. THEY HAVE NO CLUE. But atleast they got me meds that work and i dont have a fever anymore. But its like 5 different meds. They make me nauseous and tired. So its not going that well now but atleast im in a good shape to be at home rn.

Im still waiting for more results and follow-up things at the hospital. I'll update as I get to those. Thanks for reading, feel free to ask any questions and stay healthy lmao.

[penguin--person]

I’m mad happy your fic is still up I thought it got taken down or smth 😭 I literally requested to have an acc on AO3 just so I could read your fic. It is very good, feeds the brain worms

omg thank you so much!!!!:3!!!!! teehee!!!! i appreciate it so so so much!!! im writing another pafl fic rn (temnova centered) so tomorrows chapter is . not gonna come out tomorrow so sorry . but !! but . the temnova fic is p swaggin if i do say so myself.. n its already like halfway done ! wont take much longer n right after ill go n continue swap:3 ill also draw smth for it maybe... bc your nice words rlly made me happy . m. im gonna ramble about these two under the cut, and how i hope to portray them (mostly through yuras perspesctive tho, not gonna be having much of dimas for some time) n such !! teehee

so !! cleave by tart is a good song n it made me. delve into yura x dima a bit. while im not a big fan of the ship, i Am a fan of the song! i wouldnt have made yura crush on him if i wrote it now lol BUT i still think its cool . so . this also might be a bit spoilerish?? but god this fic is long i wanna talk about it!!!

dima, does not recipocrate. he does not feel the same as yura. does not like him all that much, if hes being honest. yes, he fed him and gave him a place to stay for the night, but, come on have you seen yura !! most suspicious guy around. thinks he's up to something, that he knows he's a mutant, that he wants to report him etc. yura doesn't know this though. yura himself doesn't even rlly knows how he feels towards dima. its. dima is a mutant - yura can't like him, yea sure lapses in reason can be pretty fun, but, he can't like a mutant, especially not one so lame, yea? especially one that sucks so bad at hiding that he's a mutant. but. even though he can't like him ... he can't help but blush ... he can't help but feel silly around dima ... little does he know what he feels isn't rlly love.

so. yuras messed up. depression n all that. speaking from experience, it's easy to feel like you're beyond saving when depressed and such, that you've fucked up too much, that this is it, nothing will ever get better, all that shit. he sees dima, this mutant on the run that throws up every five minutes. and it's obvious he's worse off than yura. so. in a lapse of reason. he thinks, "Oh! If i can help him, if i can take even the slightest care of him, if i can get him better, then. that means i'm not beyond saving, either. if i help him it'll mean i'm ok. that i still have a chance." . and just . smth like a bit of a hero complex moment. but dima is a BOY and yura is a boy TOO so he CANT LIKE HIM!!! because that will be GAY and yura is a young slavic teen lol of course hes got some homophobia shit going on. internalized, repressed, whatever it is its NOT good !!!

yura doesnt rlly love dima as much as he loves the idea of proving that he can prove something to himself, in short ❤️or Something like that. only knew him for a week anyway and for half of it dima wasnt all that concious. dont know if this makes sense. 👍

dont know if any of this makes sense but !! thank you again!!! :3 i appreciate it lots!!!

[ruralbi]

cause im so much younger than the other visibly out queens, especially my gay dad surrogate who's in his sixties, he babies me a lot. i also have a massive case of baby face, so i forgive him for forgetting that im almost 30. but im sure if i told him abt half of this he would tell me off for being a cheap slut and makin all of us queers look bad. if i tried to talk to him abt dick sucking problems he'd tell me 'not before ur 18, fancy'. he also tells me off for screwing around at work cause he's like that's ur livelihood fancy focus fancy and he's right. but its not my fault i draw out repressed bi dudes like a moth to a flame. its not like i have that many options.

my ex that has been keeping me on the dl for two years, probably counting even tho im trying to move past it. a guy that needs to arm wrestle me as a excuse to hold my hand. he once asked me if we could platonically buy a house together. once his mother was drunk and bein all nice and motherly towards me and immediately that night he told me that he was gonna stop seeing me the minute he found a girl he liked better. we had been living together in a studio apartment for four months at the time. we are very platonic best friends, officially.

my ex coworker who also didnt want to tell anybody cause it might hurt his tinder chances but still had the time to plow me several times a day (but not at work im a serious worker i swear dad) he only used spit as lube :( but was very enthusiastic. thankfully he moved away he was dumber than bricks. however, we respect a king that clearly communicates his sexual boundaries. my ex tried to share me with him (they were friends) and he was like thank you kindly but no, it's gay if the balls touch. i was like baby dont say this they wont touch but he still went off to be not gay in the next state and im still threesomeless

this behemoth of a builder who at least isn't in denial, just in the closet. he's got two ex wives and three children. he's a violent alcoholic but not towards me. he calls me black out drunk to tell me he loves me and talk abt god. his family are the craziest evangelicals in the county, i babysit his nephew, but his brother doesnt know we fucked. he got into a fight with his other brother and choked my housemate (his colleague) so i didnt text him back for months. but now they made up and i think i might call him back. him and my housemate got a construction job near the house and if he comes to sleep here it's over for me.

my coworker who's this really sweet bi dude!!!! he genuinely said the words i am bi to me bro he just admitted it and i think he might genuinely like me!!! we went on three honest to god dates i think. he didnt make a move but u dont take the local fairy to two concerts (just us two) and the love festival fireworks show without some kind of ideas. like we couldn't be out with our relationship at work bc he's masc and can pass for straight but i think he might tell our friends and shit at least!!!! he is really soft and big and i wanna cuddle him and also suck his dick, the bear curse. but he also he didnt try anything sexual for three whole dates so im like maybe he just wants lgbt friends? but he does talk really sweet to me so that's suspicious.

however he is not a possibility bc we Work Together and i almost blew it at work last time i slept with a coworker.

AND last time i was ALSO so sure he was such a good guy who was gonna be out and propose cause he talked so sweet during the first three weeks but four months later he was introducing me to his tinder hook up as his buddy. so lets not be stupid twice and believe the same lies every time, even if its what i wanna hear.

oh fancy u r so cute u r so sweet i wanna hold ur hand and stay in to watch horror movies, baby boy i will protect you and put u up in a nice house and treat u so nice!! princess dont worry i love u so much FAST FORWARD hey jessica meet my buddy fancy we work together!!!

also he spits in my hole jessica but u dont wanna know that dont u. i wish i didnt fuckin know that at this point. like granted at that point i realised he was dumb as bricks and didnt want anything but sex and beers to do with him but still! this dude genuinely lied through his teeth with romantic fantasies for me to bend over, so like men lie and im not gonna fall for the same trick twice. im already poor as shit i dont need to be bullied at work for bein a gay slut until i have to quit.

(tbh i get it he kinda had to cause at the time i told him i wouldve gladly fucked him but unfortunately we were coworkers and i didnt want to risk my job for a fuck and thats when he started the whole relationship talk. so it wasnt outta nowhere but still a massive dick move)

a year ago i made out with a THIRD bi coworker at a party and told him that sorry we couldn't actually go any further cause we work together and he was really gracious abt it. but i liked him a lot less than this current guy so its gonna b harder. but i have to b strong. like NO weakness to baby boy talk.

if u really want me that much, quit :/

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #011

“... so don’t you die today; no one could take your place over”

Do you know anyone that has a black belt in karate? Maybe, but not that I'm aware of. Would you rather take the elevator, escalator, or stairs? Escalator. I have a mild phobia of elevators and don't like the feeling in my stomach when you start to move on them, and I physically CANNOT climb but a very small number of steps in a stairway before my knees have completely given up. I would take THE sketchiest elevator over a decently-sized (by *my* standards) staircase. So basically, elevators are easiest for me. Do any lights stay on while you sleep? My snake's light does. Ugh, I have GOT to replace that lamp, considering red light is improper for her. I got ill-informed advice when I got her. Like it's not going to do her harm, it's just not optimal, which is what I want to offer my pets. It's just the ceramic heat emitter I got for her wasn't a high enough wattage for her terrarium, so I went back to the old light so she didn't freeze. If you have a notepad in your phone, what do you use it for the most? Oh GOD, I keep a lot in there. Just some include my dream tarantulas and ball pythons (plus ideal names), most desired pets as a whole (also with names lmao), drawing ideas, tattoo concepts, gift ideas for Girt, etc. Who is the last child that you took a photo with? Emerson, I believe. It was one of those miracle days she wanted to sit with me. How often do you wear hats? Never. Would you ever get a nature tattoo? Plan on many, dude. Will you be moving soon? Ugh, Mom and I both wish, but it's unlikely. Have you ever had a crush on someone of the same gender? Yup. Is there an artist or group that you didn’t used to like but has grown on you? With In This Moment, I initially wasn't a fan of Maria's voice, and now here they are up in the faves, haha. Have you ever cooked a meal for a large group of people? Nah. Do you enjoy being outside in the rain? No, I don't like getting wet. Who has the best hair that you know? *shrug* Have you ever been to an aquarium? Yup, at least one multiple times, and quite frankly it's a pretty shitty and dull aquarium, lol. I mean as an experience it's still cool, of course it is, but in the grand scheme of 'em all, this one is very underwhelming. Oh, and I went to SeaWorld (never do it) as a kid, and ig that's really just a big aquarium. Are you currently happy? "Happy" isn't the right word, no. I'm not sad, but not that, either. Share some lyrics to the last song you heard. Did a quick scan and it's only really fun in German, haha; the lines translate to "we only live once / we love life / we love love" which is nice and positive and all, but it's cool in its native tongue because "love" ("Liebe") and "life" ("Leben") can be pronounced very similarly or identically in certain sentence structures so it's just interesting to hear in a flow. What’s a TV show you’ve gotten into recently? Oh god, Mom likes this show with Guy Fieri called Diners, Drive-thrus, and Dives aND IT'S REALLY INTERESTING because he's basically checking out these totally random and obscure but very successful restaurants and Girt and I have developed a problem of watching it for entirely too long lmao Have you ever or are you on any type of anti-depressant? I've been on them for half my life and am now. Donuts or muffins? Donuts. What’s something you’ve been thinking about? A lot about the future and what I want. Do you or anyone you know have asthma? My mother does, and her mother did. Never gonna forget a childhood birthday party where Mom had to be taken to the ER for an attack. God that was terrifying. When did you last pump gas? I myself have never done it, oops. God I would be helpless on my own. Do you have a lazy eye? *I* think I look like I do when I smile, but no one's pointed it out before, so... Do you enjoy windy days? NO. Wind stresses me the fuck out because even on a crystal clear day, my brain connects it to tornadoes. I don't like the feeling of it, either. A breeze, cool. Wind, no. Do you experience secondhand embarrassment? Schadenfreude is a VERY real emotion, like I experience it painfully. ANYONE'S embarrassment makes me want to puke like I'm no joking, it makes me so fucking uncomfortable. What’s something that makes you feel young? Well, my insane ignorance regarding the ways of being an adult makes me feel like a child, and not at all in a good way. What makes you feel confident? Nothing, if I'm being honest. Do you have a flower bed or flowers planted around your place of residence? No, but there are some small bushes. Who is someone you find to be pretty? Oh JESUS, who to pick. You know what we goin' with Richard Kruspe as tribute to my fucking Tumblr reblogging meltdown with that man last night, get a fucking permit for that face sir What’s the heaviest weight you’ve ever lifted? Oh jeez, I don't know. Absolutely not a lot. I've always had weak upper-body strength, even when I was fit. Have you ever sat under a bridge? Yep, many a time since they're nice fishing spots. What is something you want? Since I'm consistently losing weight now, it's built up this momentum of just wishing it was all gone like, NOW NOW NOW when I know it's going to take time. To be entirely honest I think I'm already losing too fast anyway. Does your town have a lot of graffiti? It depends on what part of town you go to. In the sketchy area Hurricane Floyd rawdogged, even some residential houses are sprayed. The abandoned buildings are painted. Downtown where there's a lot of action, there's obviously not as much because you WILL be seen doing it, and there's already enough of a cop presence with the crime rate. Do you like mozzarella sticks? I actually don't, not into that kind of cheese. I mean like, I can eat some of it, but I won't be really enjoying it. Have you ever stepped on glass barefoot? AHHHHHHHHHHH not that I remember, but I once witnessed Colleen drop something and a shard jab up into her foot. It was actually extremely weird, my reaction: I felt somewhat like fainting, while blood and stuff doesn't even bother me. I guess it was just knowing my best friend got glass in her and me not knowing how deep yet. It was just a minor cut. What’s your opinion on The Beatles? I honestly am not and have never been a big fan. I never seek them out. The only song off the top of my head that I thoroughly enjoy is "Hey, Jude." Do you think it’s possible to fall in love with someone online? I wouldn't doubt it. Do you ever pluck your eyebrows? Not anymore, no. What is a TV show that you find annoying? The fact Teen Mom ever existed and still exists annoys the fuck out of me because I do NOT care what your intentions are, you're glorifying and monetizing an insanely difficult and unhealthy ordeal. Have you ever been scared of something you’ve seen on the internet? HAHA oh my god what was this stupid site I for some dumb reason knew as a kid... I'm quite certain it doesn't exist anymore, I think I even checked LONG ago, but something like "Black Sheep" or so? Anyway it had some I'm-trying-way-too-hard-too-be-scary videos on it and Mom eventually blocked the site because Nicole and I got scared laksjdflkajdfsljlkajklwje jesus take the WHEEL Do you share any of the same favorite bands as your parents/guardian? I sure do! It's funny, this is Mom's favorites list: 1.) Metallica, 2.) Ozzy Osbourne, and I'm her inverse, haha. She also enjoys most of my other faves, and I also am fond of Dad's #1, Van Halen. Do you or anyone you know want to run for any political office? No. Do you have any alcohol in your house? I feel like there's a bottle of something that's been in the fridge forever. Would you want to know if you were adopted? Are you adopted? I would absolutely want to know, but I'm not adopted. Is there a tv family that reminds you of yours? Possibly, idk. What was your parents’ opinion on same-sex relationships? Mom, full support. I don't know about my dad with certainty, but he probably is "whatever, weird, but ain't about me" regarding it. At least, I can easily imagine that just given his general outlook on life. His wife is homophobic, however, so I have my sad doubts. What is one animal unique to your country/area of the world? Bison. Buffalo =/= bison, btw. What’s one alcoholic beverage that you do not enjoy? God, I won't forget that white wine at Colleen's. Absolute bitter garbage. Have you ever had someone throw up on you before? NO laksjdf;akwejoawjer this is one of my top reasons I am VERY apprehensive to the idea of kids because *I* would add to the puke trying to clean it up. I just can't, dude. Do you prefer pads or tampons, if you need them? I find both uncomfortable in different ways, but I'd rather suffer through a tampon. I've thought about testing other products BECAUSE I really hate both of those, but y'know, squeamishness and unfamiliarity and all. Do you iron your clothes at all? Mom only irons something if it really needs it. Do you like candy corn or hate it? I loathe it, that shit is wax. Do you always shower immediately after sex? I'd go to the bathroom, but I'm not immediately hopping in a shower. How old did your oldest pet live to be? What kind of pet was it? I want to say Teddy was our oldest, and he lived to either 12 or 13, I'm oddly spacing on it right now. When was your curfew when you were younger? I want to say it was 10:30? Have you ever busted a window accidentally? No, but oh lord this reminded me of some shit my nephew did, throwing a ball way too hard and it shattered the glass door to the house. I am GLAD I wasn't there for that shit, apparently Nick nearly exploded. It's replaced now btw, haha. Do you own any pocket knives? No, I really don't like knives. How many languages can you greet somebody in? Like... five? Idk there's a lot of obvious ones that I'm probs forgetting. Do you have a favorite planet? Saturn has always been the reigning queen, but I am also a massive Jupiter fan. Neptune is pretty as well! Man, all the planets are. Space is cool. Do you know how to play the flute? Oh wow, one ACTUALLY targeted at something I can play lol, yes. I played it all through middle school and then I want to say my first two or three years of HS. I was actually pretty good at it; I remember once being second chair in middle school (my best friend Hannia was always the first chair champ), but I remember nearly nothing now. What’s a medication that has really helped you? Latuda is lit-er-a-lly why I am still alive. Do you forgive easily? Yeah, honestly. Have you ever broken up with somebody? Yes. What was the biggest phase you went through when you were younger? Uhhhh... idk Have you ever seen a spider consume another spider? It's possible I've seen this happening on a small scale irl, idk, but I've only ever very briefly seen female tarantulas killing/starting to eat their partner on video if the supervisor was incapable of separating them in time. It's unfortunate but very normal. I do want to take a moment to point out though that I do not and would fucking never watch those appalling "bug vs. bug"-type videos where some asshole just throws two critters into a little tank and see who wins and who dies. I CANNOT wrap my head around YouTube keeping those up. You are LITERALLY broadcasting animal cruelty, get that shit out. Have you ever been to a church camp? Ugh, yes. One of things i just... *did* with my sisters because my mom wanted us to. I remember having good times, but also not-so-good times at them because yeah, let's teach little kids about hammering nice men and his believers onto crosses and throwing rocks at them 'n' shit, gg. Please just let your kids choose if they want to pursue religious education, ffs. Have you ever been dehydrated? I am like... 100% of the time dehydrated, legit. I've heard it enough. Would you say you’re well-educated on religious topics? I spent most of my life trying to validate religion. I'm long done with it. Do you like Skittles? I LOVE Skittles, especially the sour ones. Did you used to read Dr. Seuss books as a kid? Of course! Green Eggs & Ham was my SHIT. God I remember my mom reading that stupid book to me so much, lmao. What’s the longest you’ve had to wait in line for something? It would without a doubt have been something at Disney World, but I have zero recollection of an approximate wait. What’s the sickest you’ve ever been? I'm actually gonna cover this on the physical AND mental front for the helluvit: Physically, it was this stomach virus I once had while still in my school ages. I don't remember any time more specific than that, but I just remember how BAD it was. I just would not stop vomiting to where even bile was barely coming up anymore. I couldn't keep saltine crackers down. That experience SUUUUUUUUUUCKED. Mentally, I think the answer's blaringly obvious to anyone who knows anything about my mental health struggles: 2016, the breakup aftermath. I remember eventually reaching such a low where not only was I practically bedridden, but I would sometimes nap like five fuckin times a day. I didn't want to exist, but was scared to die. I pray to god, to life itself, that I never, ever experience an emotional darkness that black ever again. If you had to be named after an inanimate object, what would you choose? Uhhh... I don't know. I want to say something nature-oriented, but plants and stuff are very much alive and to some extent animate, so. Oh, maybe a gem, like Ruby. Yeah, Ruby. What is one food you would not like to give up? Not exactly a food itself, but GLUTEN. Oh dear god, I am a bread FIEND and I think having such a restrictive diet would murder me. Would you ever donate a kidney to a stranger, if applicable? It's selfish, but to be entirely honest, for a stranger, no, unless of course I'm already dead, seeing as I'm a keen organ donor and encourage everyone to be. Do you have any unusual things wrong with your body? (I have different length arms and hands for example) I'm aware my breasts aren't entirely congruent, but that's very normal and isn't something you'll really notice unless you're like, me. My weight also isn't distributed totally evenly, something *I* think is very obvious when you look at my stomach. What search engine do you use? Google is That Bitch Have you ever had a flat tire? I've never had my own vehicle, but I do remember ALL the way back when my parents were together and we were going some place far, one of the tires on the van gave out and we had to use the spare donut one.

[sonlagrasrees]

FUCK FUCK FUCK

You know in life when you gotta actually do things? Like, DO do things. You know, plan for college and what you wanna do after that.

I've been meaning to write this stuff for some nights now because I will be terribly FUCKED UP if I don't figure myself out soon.

A friend has been bugging me about her college plans and I envy her for that because why does she have to get it all figured out right away WHILE I'm still here married to my phone, rotting on my bed. Slacking all summer isn't really the best thing to do for a teenager like me, I guess. Maybe I should have worked out, perhaps tried to develop my body so I'd be more muscular or whatever. Or maybe I should have reviewed for incoming college entrance exams and looked for options. I DON'T KNOW, SOMETHING ACTUALLY PRODUCTIVE. That bullshit "you don't have to be productive---" Facebook quotes really fucked my soul. I don't know man, I guess I let everything slip because I'm too stubborn to plan for my future. Why? Because the future terrifies me. Anyway, I think I'm just angry at everything right now because I really have no idea what I want. AND I DON'T KNOW WHY!!!!! It's ironic actually because I hate my current situation. I hate living in this town, in this house, with these people. I NEED to get away from them. I need to pass the UPCAT (I heard there's a high possibility of UP conducting entrance exams again this year) because I desperately want to be AWAY.

Oh my god, okay, I think I just canceled whatever I said in the first sentences of this essay. I know what I want! I want to leave this place. I want to study at UP. I know, I know. It's ambitious. I mean for someone who barely remembers his science lessons and is horrible with numbers, my chances of flunking the CETs are as big as the sun. So maybe I should check some materials online. Maybe I should stop being so lazy and stubborn and get my shit together or I'll end up being a random, weird, and creepy dude who spends his day on his bed scrolling and saying shitty stuff on Twitter.

So the goal is to get to UP. That's not so hard, I just have to review the basic foundations of science, math, and grammar. SHIT.

Now the scenario still looks bleak because I don't know what college degree I should take, given that I don't have a thing. You know, A THING. Some people are really good at debating, some are terrific writers and readers, and some have really good hands in drawing, painting, and all that artsy stuff. Me? A jack of all trades is a master of none. I swear my English teacher once uttered that in one of her classes but I don't have the energy to search which dead poet said that or whoever she told us said that quote. It's also an incomplete quote that I'm sure I'm using outside its supposed context. My point is that I'm not so confident with my writing skills or art styles. I don't think pursuing a passion that is based on them is worth the risk. Discovering what you like is really difficult since the risk of that shit not liking you back is a deal-breaker. But I guess I will just have to work with what I have-LOVE FOR HUMANITIES. Sure, I'm not a bookworm or some feminist who's in love with Jane Austen, but I do enjoy reading ( just not for a long period of time). I also like to write and discover information about current events and history. And that's a big BIG thing-if ever I decide to be a journalist or a teacher or something related- since I am not a risk-taker. AT ALL. Why the fuck would you eat a random berry when you're stuck on an island? That shit could literally be poison, go fetch some coconut! See! that's how I think, I'd rather be hungry and feed on ants than die from my own ignorance. I NEED TO KNOW THINGS!!!------ SHIT WHERE IS THIS GOING????

aLL IM TRYNA SAY IS. I. NEED. HELP. and I know no one's ever gonna read this except myself (or if I send this to my crush who I think I am obsessed with so I better not send it to them because that will just release me into my insanity and eventually break my heart because they don't like me back for some reason that they refuse to disclose to me because they basically ghosted me and I stopped messaging them because when people don't text you back that usually means they're not into you so you gotta back off and I'm really really super frustrated at how my life is going right now so I don't need myself adding more fuel to the flame or smoke or something aaaaaa). SO THE BEST PERSON SO TURN TO is not some weird sky daddy BUT MYSELF. I need to pull my shit together and focus on my goal number 1-GET INTO the UNIVERSITY OF THE PHILIPPINES ( I do not want to discuss to myself why I want to study at that specific university or campus). I need to study for college entrance tests and fuck-take care of my skin and body more.

Man, I really wish I was more motivated and inspired and in love.

[fang-wife]

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voyeur | m. izuku 

➳ tags ;; sub!izuku, dom!reader, watching hentai together?, reader is mean and nice </3, quirkless college au!izuku, corruption kink/religious guilt, unprotected sex/creampies, established relationship, afab reader

➳ wc ;; 2.1k

➳ a /n ;; @/sems-diarie made a post abt this a while ago n my brain wouldn’t let it be so. here we are </3 

➳ plot ;; izuku didn’t sneak you into your dorm to watch.. this with you. but he has a habit of letting you do what you like. 

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This is embarassing. 

He knows this is embarassing - more embarassing than he really cares to admit to. He should really know better by now then to let you do as you please. You’re always stringing him along with your schemes and plans and he loses sight of his morals. His standards. 

Then again, he doesn’t have any at this point. The point of him paying for this single dorm was so that he could have space to focus. It wasn’t to sneak you in when his R.A. wasnt looking. Even more then that, it wasn’t to do.. whatever this was. 

It’d be one thing if he was having sex. That’s a normal thing to do in college, to sneak your partner in and smash. But you’re you, and all you ever seem to have planned for him are hair-brained schemes. It’s what this feels like - when you sit on his twin size bed and pat the empty space next to you. The distrust in his expression makes you laugh.. He sighs and does what you’ve asked. 

“What’re you doing?” 

He sounds exasperated. You laugh - too pleasantly for him to be comfortable. You type something into the search bar. Green eyes widen, skin warm and blushing. 

“Wh-what’re you doing?” 

You laugh as you prop the computer on the bed. You grin at him, tucking yourself under his arm. The website mocks him, all black background and animated women with huge tits covering the screen edge to edge. 

“You know something, after you’re done using incognito mode - you’re supposed to switch out to regular search, you know,” you explain. Your hand rests on his thigh. Deku freezes. 

The sound of your voice has always been something of a vice. It gets a little raspy like this - sultry in a way that has him squirming. He doesn’t know what to do. He can feel the heat of your body. 

“Would you know my surprise when I borrow your phone to look up when the convience store closes,” you inch closer, press further “only to see..” 

He knows what you saw before you announce it. His skin feels like it’s on fire, tuning out whatever description you’ve been giving of what he chose to watch. 

Maybe it was the way he was raised - but he always had such a specific sort of guilt towards pornography. Always told himself he shouldn’t watch things like that, shouldn’t touch himself. Izuku had always been a good, well-behaved boy. Done the right thing even when it was hard. 

Meeting you had changed that, changed him. He found his body craving you when he couldn’t control it and he ended up here - watching porn and jerking off with his shirt in his mouth. It’s all come back to haunt him, really. 

“I’m not mad, y’know,” ― and your tone goes soft - it’s assuring enough that Izuku can whimper out an okay, but you’re not done ― “I’m just curious. Can’t we watch it together?,” 

“That’s ― !” 

You flutter your lashes him. 

“That’s?” 

He has a million words that he can say. That he should say. Bad, wrong, immoral. Words that belong at the end of the sentence to describe what he’s doing with you and what he’s considering. 

None of that comes out. 

“That’s.. too much” 

You grin at him. 

“Do you not want too?” 

“..I didn’t say that, it’s just -” 

Your hand squeezes his thigh until your stiletto's dig into them. Your mouth trails his jaw with hot, open mouth kisses until your turning his head to face you. A hand splayed on his face, tongue deep in his mouth. French kissing makes him pant - hands twitching eagerly to touch you. He watches, dazed - the spit trail of saliva that stretches between you two. 

He’s so easy, it’s cute. You press forward with a chaste kiss. 

“Show me what you were watching, Izuku,” 

His hand trembles as he leans forward. He remembers the title - doesn’t know if that’s good or bad. Within seconds, it shows up and he clicks. You lean forward too, observing the tags with a small smile on your face. 

“Milf, NTR, Gangbang,” 

“S-stop reading them!” 

You giggle. 

Without warning - you press play. Izuku finds himself frantic. Worried about the sound, the time, all of it - but you don’t seem to care. The AD comes on and you skip that too. It’s on. A familiar arousal blooms in his chest, the memory of what he’d seen appearing. You settle between his legs, your back pressed to his chest. You bring his hands around your waist.

“Let’s watch ~” 

Izuku face twists with displeasure. The plot nothing to ride home about - a lonely housewife goes out to a club and finds someone to take care of her needs. At first it’s just one stranger at the club - then two, then she’s surrounded and its too much. 

Izuku assumes you’re gonna find him disgusting, but when he looks at your face - you’re smiling, heart-beating in your chest. His eyes blow wide when you take his hand between your legs. You’re wet and you’re letting him touch you and he’s trying his hardest not to show how much he’s shaking. 

A little sigh of pleasure leaves your mouth when Izuku very carefully rubs your clit. It throbs under the pressure of big fingers - you hold his wrist and moan. He can hear the porn in the background but it doesn’t serve to distract him from you. 

“You want me to go n’ get fucked by a bunch of strangers, ‘zuku?” 

He shakes his head furiously. 

“Then you just like watching depraved shit, huh?” 

Unable to argue with you or with the the way his cock twitches and jumps in his jeans, he opts to whine. You can feel his it against your lower-back, the little wet-spot that presses to your thin tshirt. He’s too turned onto think properly - watching the way your body jerks and twitches. 

The woman on screen is stuffed to the brim with cock - it’s all over exaggerated he knows, but he thinks that’s why he likes it. Maybe he just likes the idea of fucking someone that stuffed fulled of cum, how it leaks and pours onto every surface and the way her cunt just seems to take it. And Izuku is such a good, well behaved boy - it’s never crossed his mind to think about doing it to you. 

And no, he doesn’t really want to see you get fucked by so many men but if there were more than one of him he’d be more than inclined to let you. His chest feels tight forgetting to breath. 

He thinks maybe you’re some kind of witch because you always seem to know what he wants before he does. The right way to push all of his buttons. 

“Oh, I see’ ― and he’s afraid of whatever words come out of your mouth next ― “you wanna fuck me full of your cum, Izuku? Wanna know how it feels raw?” 

He moans - loud and shameless and needy against your ear. A breathless laugh leaves your mouth because that’s exactly what he wants. He wants to fuck you full of cum, just picturing how good it might feel. 

You sit up on your knees and bend over a little - pulling short-shorts beneath the curve of your ass and thickest parts of your thigh. Your panties are drenched, clinging to your folds. He inhales sharply, frozen till as you lean forward - pulling them to one side. 

“Take your cock out ‘n fuck me then, baby” ― you challenge, dark and dangerous. Everything about you is so sinful and too tempting for him to ignore. His cock aches ― “Do your best”  

His body moves before he has a proper chance to feel shame. Whatever devils been whispering in his ear (read: you) has won whatever leftover dignity he has left. Without a proper word, his cock stands to attention. His hands are fidgety but they mange to settle on your waist. He guides you down on his dick, bottom lipped pulled between his teeth hard enough to draw blood. 

“Oh, fuck” 

He’s going to cum right away if he doesn’t take a breather. This is the first time he’s feeling you, and it feels so much better than he could understand. The lingering thoughts of the dangerous act silence by how tight and how wet and how willing your pussy is for him. The way your walls twitch - ache shamelessly around his cock. He’s fucking sliding in and out of you - it feels like a special privilege he’s done nothing to earn.

He’s shivering, over and over. When he looks down, he’s not all the way in. He’s not sure if he’s praying to god for the right reason - for forgiveness. All he can think about is how good it feels to be inside and how he absolutely doesn’t want to do anything else. 

“How’s it feel, Izuku?” 

He groans at the sound of your voice, the way you clench down on him and stretch so tightly around his shaft. He’s too wrapped up in the feeling of your cunt - like heaven and silk. 

“F-feels so, so good” 

Part of you thinks you should ride him, but another part of you is more interested in seeing how he fucks you. You snap the laptop closed and push it to the other side of the bed, before flipping around and laying on your back. His cock slips out and he snaps into reality - the way you have your legs in the air and your arms out. 

“I’ll let you fuck me as many times as you want today,” ― your legs reach and wrap around his waist, easily forcing his cock back inside ― “go on,” 

Izuku is a mess, really. His pants are only half-way pulled down and he’s wearing a nerdy graphic t-shirt. He’s borderline in hysterics over how good your pussy feels and can’t do anything other than thank you repeatedly and fuck you with an animalistic need. It’s clumsy like you’d expect, but he makes up for it with sheer enthusiasm. 

His cock is long and pretty - hits every spot you need it too. Izuku fucks you with shallow, sloppy thrusts - so needy and chasing his orgasm. Selfish and inexperienced. Every time he pushes forward, you can feel he’s throbbing. Aching to cum inside and unload. 

You reach a hand between the two of you to finish on your own time - planning on cumming before him. He doesn’t seem to care. 

“Ngh, ohh my god, feel’s’good” 

“Yeah? Gonna cum inside me, handsome? Makin’ such a pretty face for me” 

His stomach churns at the way you call him pretty. It sounds so sweet and adoring - but he knows that you’re a bully. He knows that about but fucks you with all his strength anyways - overly frustrated and fucked out of his mind by the feeling. Like a drug. He likes you so much he feels stupid over it. 

“Yeah, yeah ‘m gonna” 

Your own orgasm washes over you in a pleasant wave, squeezing his cock with force. He gasp and goes faster - all the thoughts washed away from his head. He needs to finish more than he needs anything. More than he needs to sleep for his 6am work-out and 8am class. More than he needs to be quiet because the walls of his dorm are paper thin. More than he needs to exercise self-control, he needs to cum so fuckin bad. 

“Look at me,” 

He follows your command, like always - and you look amused and fucked out just like he is. And Izuku has really never been this into anyone before so seeing you evokes feelings he can’t understand. 

“Oh, fuuck“ 

Briefly he understands that he really just came by looking at you, but nothing really makes sense to him. His eyes are heavy and he’s drooling onto your shoulder, spasming and clinging to your body with the most needy little whimpers. It’s so lewd, how he can feel his cum spurt out and coat your insides and his cock. It’s all so sinful but it feels so good, he can’t bring himself to care. 

“So,” ― you smile, full of mischief ― “if you want to be like that, we’ve got a few rounds to go” 

Izuku splutters at your comment and you laugh. He knows you’re not joking and he whines. You really are a bad influence on him. But with the way his cock is twitching to life again.. 

He might not be any better. 

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[weaselbrownie]

U open for a req? Can you do Notice by Little Mix for a Draco smut? Really love your writing aaaaaaa 🙈🙈🙈

notice | d.m

draco malfoy x fem!reader

summary : it’s been a while since you’ve been intimate with draco and you are determine to change that

warning : NSFW! smut, swearing, degradation, praising, overstimulation, breeding kink (?) (lemme know if i missed any)

word count : 3.3k

a/n : feels like i’ve been dead but hopefully i’ll be consistent again :) also thank you for requesting and hopefully i didn’t mess this up 

MASTERLIST

You twist and turn in front of a big mirror that sits on the floor, smiling as your fingertips graze over your figure. Looking back through the mirror to see just the ends of your bed in the dimly lit room. You began to fix your hair into a low ponytail so it wouldn't get in the way of your robe. You looked over the mirror one final time to make sure everything is in place before marching to your boyfriend's dorm. Your reflection was a true beauty, standing so still in the cold atmosphere as the delicate white lace decorates your body, covering only the necessary bits.

Oh, he's gonna love this, or maybe not?

Lately, your relationship with Draco has taken a toll, nothing terrible but it's definitely something, an inconvenience if you will. Since the exams are coming up he has not been able to put down his book, perfecting his skills to come out on top of everyone else. Not that there's anything wrong with being ambitious– he is a Slytherin after all. It's just– he's been benching you to the sidelines, though he still gives you attention he's not giving you the attention that you need. Specific attention that only he can give to you.

The throbbing ache in between your legs has been kicking you in the guts for days and you have been so patient but tonight is the night you change things.

You quietly hum as you pick up your house robe to put on over your lingerie, walking delicately across your dorm as you opened your door, heading straight to the blonde's room. It wasn't a long walk and as you approach the door at the end of the corridor you didn't even bother to knock, slowly twisting the doorknob as you let yourself in.

Just as you predicted Draco is sitting by his desk, drowning in hundreds of parchments and textbooks. Like your dorm, his is also dark, only a little desk lamp to unveil his pale face. You were so quiet he didn't even notice you come in, and so you walk closer and closer to his sitting figure.

With every step, a new feature of his is brighter– clearer. How the top of his head is messy– probably from running his hands over it again and again. How his brows knit together as his eyes wander over the page of the book he's reading. How he bites his lips in between those perfect rows of teeth. Or how his long slender fingers toy with the edge of the paper– the veins running down his flexed arms– oh how much you've missed those fingers.

Right as you revealed yourself from the dark he looked up, his bright orbs meeting yours in the dark. He was happy you've come, you could tell by the way the corner of his lips twitches into a tiny smile he likes to hide– thinking you wouldn't notice them.

"I didn't hear you come in" He whispered as he extended his arms out to reach your hips– slowly pulling you closer to him.

"Well, you had your nose buried deep in those books" You replied with an identical tone, hushing to him in the dark.

Draco was about to set you on his lap before you stopped him, picking up your hand as your fingers grazed over his, grabbing onto it softly as you guided his hand onto your chest. You were halfway there before his hand froze,

"Not tonight darling, I've got a lot t–"

"When is it then Draco?" You snapped at him before he even got the chance to finish his sentence. Shocked at your reaction Draco's brows shot up, looking up at you as if you were an unsolved puzzle with a missing piece. "You're always busy studying! I put in all this effort into myself and– "

"Effort? Not to burst your bubble darling but you came exactly in a school robe, what effort?" He cut you off as you did with him seconds ago.

"You haven't even tried taking it off– oh for merlin's sake–" You continued to raise your voice as frustration takes over you, in which you ended up ripping off your robe– showing Draco everything that sits underneath.

From the way his eyes shot open to analyze every aspect of your body, you really thought he was going to put down his book for a second but everything comes crashing down as he parts his lips. "I'm still busy Y/N," He said as if you didn't just strip yourself in front of him.

He sighs as he continued to speak "Maybe if you go and sit down and be quiet like a good girl, I might just consider your little offer" He finished off his sentence.

"Consider? Oh, you've got to be fucking with me" You started again as the palm of your hands flew to your hips, right when you were about to open your mouth again an idea struck you. Maybe if– yeah that might just work.

"Dray please" Your figure softened as you pouted to him, showing him your big shiny eyes. "I miss you" You continued as you lowered yourself to his lap, your hands slithering around to the back of his neck as you move around in the spot.

"Later okay?" He replied as he kissed your nose.

Frustrated with him you shot out of his lap to stand straight. "Fine, I'll do it myself" You hissed at him as you stomped down to his neatly made bed. You continued your way to the bed as you heard Draco chuckle from behind. You knew he was enjoying this, toying you around on a string knowing he's the only one who could really get you there.

You sat right in the middle of his bed as you got comfortable on top of the heavy sheets. You had a few ideas and one of them has got to work, right?

You began to gently trace your hand from the top of your neck, slowly bringing it down to your collar bone and to the valley of your breast where each sat so beautifully on the cup of your lingerie. You squeezed your breasts ever so gently, drawing out the pleasure that comes with it.

You looked up to see Draco still reading his stupid books. You casually rolled your eyes as you continued your actions. With every movement, you imagined it to not be your own but rather the touch of the boy in front of you. How he would run his hands all over your body before ripping each piece of clothing off.

Your hand left your breasts to continue down to the heat in between your legs. Keeping all eyes on him, you slowly drew your legs apart, touching everything that could be reached before placing your cold fingers directly on top of your cunt.

You were soaked– your juices staining the outside of your underwear. Just then you began to put pressure into your fingers, slowly rubbing your clit through your underwear as you let the little moans slip out.

Draco tensed immediately upon hearing your voice, yet he continued to face the other way, keeping his eyes on the long pages of the book. You resumed your actions and moved your underwear to the side, goosebumps start to form on your arms as the cold wind hit your sopping cunt.

"It's not gonna work princess" Draco called out as he flipped a page. You knew that if you answered he was gonna win, and so you push and push until you could get to him.

Your moans and whimpers grew louder by the second as you worked your fingers faster on your clit, you knew it was starting to bother him, but you needed that one last push to really rail him.

"Oh– fuck" Your moans cut in parts as you found a sweet spot,

"Yes– Oh god Theo–"

The second his name slip past your lips Draco immediately stood up, throwing the book that was in his hand across the room, and sprinted towards you just to rip your fingers away. Right when he touched you, you could see flames behind his cold eyes, anger as you moaned out his best mate's name instead of his.

Draco didn't say anything at first, all you could see was his eyes, roughly as he took both your hands and pinned them right on top of your head on the headboard. "So this is how you're gonna play hm?" He asked as his face neared your own. He was so close that all you could smell was him, how his toxic scent of mint and citrus circles around the air as you inhale it.

You looked deep into his eyes, and you knew he would give you what you wanted all along. The air was thick around you as you didn't answer his previous question. All you could do was wait for him as he trapped you under his body and his strong gaze.

"I asked you a question Y/N, now where are the manners I taught you?" He asked as he slurred his words.

"Y-yes! I mean no or I–" You opened your mouth to answer him yet all that came out was blabber.

"Pathetic" Draco basically spat at you as he pinned your hands higher, making you sit straight rather than slouched down like you were earlier. "Open your fucking legs" He continues as you obeyed every order coming out of his mouth.

You slowly opened your legs as your wet cunt revealed itself, your underwear going to its original position to cover your heat. You could see your juices leaking down the side. You switched your gaze back to your boyfriend on top of you, a small smirk formed on the edge of his lips as he looked into your heat.

You stayed silent as Draco carefully picked out his next moves. Slowly he stroked your thighs higher and higher until he rested his palm right on top of where you needed him, he was so close yet so far away, and so it surprised you when all of sudden he delivered a hard smack onto your cunt, jolting your body awake as your back arches.

He didn't stop there, giving you exactly two more slaps before soothing the covered skin. Tears pooled on your bottom lashes as you looked at him, his eyes still bore into your sopping cunt and his hand strong as he kept both your hands in place.

Draco kept quiet as he slowly moved your panties to the side– exposing your burning cunt to him. Your hole clenches as the cold air swoops over it, the mixture of pain and pleasure clung onto you. Your body jolts once more as Draco gave your cunt another slap, right on your clit where you're most sensitive.

"Fucking Theo" Draco said, breaking the silence. His fingers slither around your cunt as he gathered all the widespread juices. Massaging your clit gently as you threw your head back. "You wanna go down to his dorm now? Show him how much of a cockwhore you are?" He said as each word went straight to your core.

You quickly shook your head but that wasn't good enough for him "Use your words" He spat as his hand broke away from your cunt to grab your face.

"N-no" You quickly said as he tightens his hand around your jaw,

"No who?" He asked once more

"N-no D-Draco," You said as you mentally cursed yourself for stuttering so much.

Draco stayed still for a second, looking deep into your eyes before letting go of your face just to shove his fingers up inside you. He didn't give you time to adjust as he started to fuck you with his fingers.

A loud moan escaped your mouth as you threw your head back and your eyes roll to the back of your head. The continued feeling of pain and pleasure didn't leave you as it got more intense from Draco's actions. His long and slender fingers worked themselves deep inside you, turning you into a puddle under his touch.

"Can Theo do this?" He asked through gritted teeth as he kept pumping his fingers in and out of your sopping cunt "Fucking answer me Y/N! Can Theo do this to you?" He snapped as you failed to answer his question once more.

"N-No he can't" You finally screamed out as he speeds up.

His fingers continued to assault your throbbing cunt as he felt every inch of you. How your walls tighten around him every few seconds due to how good he made you feel. The fact that it's been a while since you've done this adds to the pleasure, it feels exactly or even better than the first time he went down on you.

It wasn't long until you feel like you were about to burst. The tight coil starts to form at the pit of your stomach as Draco moved to kiss you down your neck. "This is what you wanted right?" Draco mumbled against your collar bone.

"Yes– please I'm so close" You moaned out loud once again.

You were right on the edge, screaming his name as the once silent room was now filled with the sound of your filthy moans and slick heat. Draco didn't have to do much to get you there and so he continues as you felt your walls tighten and your breath hitched. "Oh, I'm gonna cum– Draco fuck.."

Suddenly he stopped his actions, pulling his fingers out of you as you whined at the loss. "But as I remembered you wanted Theo, not me," He said as a smirk grew on the corner of his lips.

A feeling of panic grew within you as Draco started to get up, without thinking twice you grabbed onto his wrist keeping him from standing up, you got up on your knees as your face met his. "N-no no please, I only want you" You brought your hands up to cup his face as you peck his soft lips. "I'm sorry please–". The room fell into silence as you tremble in front of Draco. Just as you were about to speak again, he opened his mouth.

"Get on your hands and knees"

Your eyes widened as you slowly let go of his face, scrambling back onto the bed to get into position. You settled down as you faced the headboard, arching your back just like he taught you. You couldn't see him but you could hear the light shuffling behind you and soon the warmth of his hands on your hips.

"My poor baby, you want to come don't you?" Said Draco as his fingers work to slide your underwear down– the cold air meeting your open cunt once more. "Let's see if you deserve it" You jumped as you felt a tongue flat on your cunt, slithering around as it works down on you. It didn't take long for that one familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach to return.

You arched your back further, shoving yourself to him to finally reach orgasm yet he surprises you once more. You knew you were close but as soon as that feeling came you felt the loss of his tongue on you as the air filled his spot.

"Draco please– I'm sorry" You choked out as another orgasm was robbed from you. He didn't reply as he simply taps your lower back. Before you know it you felt the tip of his cock prodding at your entrance.

"Are you sorry though?" He said as the tip of his cock slips into you "For all, I know you're just a cock hungry whore" He continued as he pushed more of himself into you "Willing to take anyone to fuck you" His hands made way to your hips, gabbing onto them as he rammed the remaining of himself into you, forcing his way in– taking your breath away.

You felt every inch of him, ripping his way through you as the pain and pleasure continued to linger. Just as you were about to answer him, he abruptly pulled back and slammed into you, giving you merely seconds to adjust before repeating his actions.

Then and there he started to pound into you, taking all the air from your lungs. You felt him- his hand as one left your hips to grip your throat, slowly lifting you up so that your back meets his chest.

"You're mine..." He said as the grip on your throat tightens "...And I'm not sharing you with anyone" The feeling that was robbed from you twice started to come back. Your walls tighten as Draco's other hand snuck down to your clit, rubbing in fast motion as you struggled to keep still. "Did I make myself clear?"

You had a hard time processing his words as his cock and his fingers work on you "Y-Yes– Clear Draco" You spat out as the feeling becomes too overwhelming. You couldn't think straight but you knew you were close. Your moans became louder as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, the darkroom making you dizzy.

You could hear Draco talk and groan behind you but you couldn't register what he was saying. "I'm c-coming– Please can I cum?" You started to stutter as the feeling sits on the edge of your body. "Please Draco please can I– fuck" You lost your breath as he didn't slow down his movements.

"Go on then, show me how good you can be coming on my cock" He whispers into your ear as you let go. Your hands grabbing onto him as he helps you through your high, continuing the motion on your clit and pounding into you as the feeling grew stronger and stronger. His hand slowly unclasped your throat– letting the air flow through you again. He guided you through it all just like he always does but he doesn't stop there.

"D-Dray too much -p-please" You whined pathetically as he continued to rut into you, overstimulation started to take over you. Black spots started to appear at the edge of your vision and your consciousness started to slip.

"I'm not done darling– you wanted this so be a good girl and take it," He said in between groans as he speeds up once more. You continued to moan and whine as he reached his high.

Finally, his hips began to stutter, his thrusts becoming uneven as his breath hitched behind you. Draco held onto you as he was approaching, making you feel the warmest of love at the pit of your stomach. "Fuck Y/N" Draco groaned as one of his hands reached out to grip the headboard.

Soon you felt him come inside you, shooting white ropes of cum deep into you as he finally stops his movements completely.

His deep breathing could be heard from behind you as he slowly pulls out from behind you and guides you back down onto the mattress. "Hold it in" He whispered as he turned you to lay on your back.

You could feel your eyes stutter and Draco moving from somewhere above you. The warmth of his palm made contact with your skin as he glides them up and down the side of your legs. "Dray–" You whined as you could feel yourself returning from the fizzy headspace, moving around as you slowly sat upright before you were stopped by him once more.

"Oh no we're not done here," He said as a small smirk formed the edge of his lips. You wanted this, and now you will have to sit in for the whole night as you two caught up on what you've missed.

TAGLIST : @microwavedhampster @o-rion-sta-r @willowmores @whenuwereyoung

[forestlingincorporated]

I wanna talk about Janet Drake

I’m not against exaggeratedly evil versions of Tim’s parents, tbh. It’s fanfiction, if we can depict an Exaggeratedly Good version of Bruce (which we can, and I do, and I love) then we can depict the Drakes as Exaggeratedly Bad. As someone who personally identifies with Tim, and his brand of complicated parental abuse in particular, I find it cathartic to uncomplicate that abuse and rescue him from the Obviously Evil Bad People. 

That said, since much of comics lore is passed down word of mouth, the oral tradition surrounding Tim has developed this idea of Janet as The Worse Parent between her and Jack that was never really present in the comics. We see much LESS of Janet, and we have 20 years worth of comics depicting Jack as a neglectful hotheaded idiot who ultimate does love his son. More importantly, Jack isn’t very much LIKE Tim, so there is a habit to attribute Tim’s traits to his mother... and, as someone who really really identifies with Tim, Tim has... some negative traits. Tim can be a bitch sometimes. He’s fiercely intelligent and sweet and kind, with a strong sense of justice, but he can be cold and judgmental and unthinking - he fights those traits, but he does have them. 

And it is perfectly fine to depict Janet that way. I’ve enjoyed depictions of Cold Calculating Janet Drake, but it’s not the ONLY option, and I want to challenge fans to consider different avenues. Tim could pick up these traits from anywhere: a nanny, Mrs. Mc Ilvaine (”Mrs. Mac”), a teacher, tv, Sherlock Holmes novels, Bruce Wayne himself. Tim is capable of not being like EITHER parent. 

So, what do we KNOW about Janet? (I’ll also touch on Jack, but only in scenes he appears with Janet.) 

When Janet was first introduced she was depicted as a gentle but “modern” woman. This was written in 1989, told by a 13 year old Tim, so this theoretically was meant to take place in 1979. I’m not here to give a lecture on the history of sex discrimination in the united states, but much of the legislation protecting women in the workforce or surrounding women’s bodily autonomy would have been very very new in this initial depiction. 

Here, Janet is shown to be encouraging, emotional, maternal, and projects her own feelings onto Tim. Jack is shown to be slightly sexist, possibly discouraging, but not overbearing. And the artist is shown not to know how to draw children. 

To insert some speculation, I think it’s important to note all the Drakes witnessed a terrible murder/accident that day. I point this out, because this is the last time Jack and Janet are depicted this way. It’s possible they changed as a result of this event specifically. 

However, this is also a story being told by Tim. It’s also possible these events aren’t really “real” at all, and Tim is misremembering what his parents were like as a three-year-old, possibly projecting a more palatable version of his parents into the narrative. This is entirely up to personal interpretation. 

In fact, the Drakes are shown in Legend of the Dark Knight attending Haly’s Circus, and the artist knows what a toddler looks like and they’re depicted as already having a slightly strained relationship. Jack is clearly on the defensive, and Janet seems to be passive-aggressive, though she could just be attempting to explain the situation to her toddler honestly. The intended tone isn’t especially clear. 

I do want to point out, in this depiction, Tim isn’t being carried like he was in the previous one. He’s walking ahead of his parents, which isn’t a terrible horrible crime, but could be dangerous in a crowded place like the circus. Might be a subtle hint to his parents overall neglect. 

Back to A Lonely Place of Dying, in Tim’s memories of the night he discovered Robin and Dick Grayson were the same person at nine-years-old, his parents are home, and watching TV together while Tim played... trucks, idk, in the living room with them. (This is semi-interesting, because you could say “oh, Tim liked vehicle toys as a kid” or you could extrapolate that this is another subtle indication of Jack’s sexism, providing Tim with appropriately “boy toys.” Either interpretation is valid. If Tim was assigned female at birth, would they have been given “girl toys,” or allowed to play with whatever they wanted?) 

This is, to my knowledge, the only panel of the Drakes when Tim is between ages 3 and 13. They’re all together, which might indicate that the Drakes were home more often when Tim was 9, only later going on business trips when Tim was “old enough” but... 

This is Tim’s boarding school when he’s 13. While most boarding schools in the US are for grades 9-12, Tim is clearly not a freshman at age 13; look how much younger the other kids in this panel are. In the US, the youngest you can attend most boarding schools is 7. 

That means Tim could have begun going to boarding school anytime between 7 and 13. He most likely spent all of middle school in boarding school, at least. There are an almost infinite number of possible ways the Drakes handled having a business that required lots of international travel, an archeology hobby, AND a very young child. Janet staying home until Tim was 7, 11, 13, is equally possible as the Drakes having a nanny until 7, 11, 13. Tim just doesn’t talk about that period of his life very much.

(”What about Mrs. Mac?” - it is unclear when Mrs. Mac begins working for the Drakes. We only see her when Jack comes out of his coma. She could either be a long standing staff member, or a recent hire.) 

Note: I’ve seen it said that it’s canon that “According to Tim, when his parents were home, they made a point to try and include him in their activities, bringing him along to events that were normally adults only.” I have never seen this panel, or I don’t remember it, so I cannot confirm, but I also cannot debunk this because... comics. 

By the time Tim is 13, Jack and Janet are away on business trips a lot, with limited communication, and no firm return date. If I’m feeling generous, I’d say it was harder to communicate internationally in 1990 than it is today. If I’m not feeling generous, I’d say the Drakes are extremely wealthy, and international communication was easier than ever before in the 80s and 90s. They’re not even going home to see Tim in a week or two, they’re going home and calling Tim at boarding school in a week or two. 

Even Bruce thinks its weird, though he doesn’t say so to Tim’s face. It’s written almost as if Tim’s parents’ neglect was meant to be a plot point that just got forgotten about. 

Tim’s parents are fighting at this point (their poor assistant), but Janet still goes with Jack on these business trips. And she’s clearly involved in the business, somehow, but the comics never SAY what Janet’s JOB is. We’re told Jack is the exec, but Janet is ONLY ever referred to as Jack’s wife, though they’re later described as the “heads” of the company, plural. 

Just to be clear, this is Jack’s business. There’s a perception that Jack is a bad business man because he and Janet fight over company decisions, and Jack looses the business after Janet dies, but Jack looses the company YEARS after Janet dies, and maintains it for about a year after No Man’s Land at that. We’re not told how Jack looses the business, but he’s got to be doing something right. Janet isn’t necessarily the “real brains” of Drake Industries. 

And I’m not... gonna... touch the... exploitation and racism because... I’m not qualified to do that. But, here’s the panel. The Drakes sure seem exploitative and racist in their business decisions. Someone else can... analyze that with more nuance. 

Regardless how how long they’ve been fighting, when their lives are in danger, the Drakes fall back into a loving husband and wife. Their marriage may be falling apart, but they do care about each other. 

I want to show these panels because it shows that Tim and Jack do have things in common. They’re both level headed in a crisis and can be somewhat cold in their practicality. Janet meanwhile and silent. Jack is later willing rant and rave at their captors, but Janet remains silent. 

That is, until they’re alone, and she finally lets herself fall apart. 

God, Jack can be obnoxious. Janet just looks miserable and resigned. I actually think Tim takes after his parents in this respect in equal measure. Tim can have a temper, but he can also be fairly melancholy and defeatist. 

Jack keeps reminding Janet to be strong and in control, which could be period typical sexism? But Jack seems so practiced and ready with the words of encouragement, and with Tim’s history with depression, I wonder if Janet has an inclination towards it as well. 

As the end approaches, when Jack brings up Tim, Janet seems to have a lot of regret. She talks about “wasting” the good things, and I don’t think it’s too big of a stretch to assume she’s talking about time spent with her only child. 

From this point on, Janet is at times spoken of, but not seen. Like here, when Jack says Janet wouldn’t approve of him and Tim being so “far apart.” He says this after he tells him he takes back his threat to send him back to boarding school, which might imply Janet was against the idea of boarding school? Though she obviously lost that argument when she was alive. 

Jack will of course renege on this later, but that’s Jack Drake for you. 

Or here in Tim’s illness induced dream, where he gets everything he wants. Though, since this is a fantasy of Tim’s, where his father and girlfriend are both more accepting and understanding than they are in real life, I would take this depiction of Janet with a grain of salt. 

After loosing Drake Industries, Jack thinks about Janet (though, they call her Catherine/Cathy for some fucking reason) during his depressive episode. And... uh... 

Hallucinates a Valkyrie???? Is this symbolic of suicidal thoughts, or is she... real? Or is he seriously hallucinating? 

Anyway, we’re not here to discuss Jack’s mental state, the fact that he forgot Tim’s birthday, or that concerning “I was going to knock some sense into you but you’re still bigger than me” statement from Tim, we’re here to talk about Janet. And even though this entire arc is about Jack mourning his first wife, they don’t SAY anything about Janet herself at all. I mean, they don’t even get her name right, so I guess what was I expecting. 

Then there’s Origins and Omens, which also doesn’t say anything about Janet, except that Tim’s memory of her is faulty - Janet was poisoned, her assistant Jeremy’s throat was slit on television, but Tim seems to have conflated the death he did see with the death he didn’t. 

The only piece of canon to suggest that Janet might be cold, is Tim compares her to Thalia. And even then, he’s really just saying Janet was protective of him. It’s kind of a scary look to make at your kid, but Bruce does the same thing, so. 

I do want to say... it’s not 100% clear if Tim is even talking about Janet. He could be talking about Dana. Dana was observably protective of Tim, though I don’t think he’s ever called her mom. He PROBABLY means Janet. 

And finally we have Tim visiting his mother’s grave (in a duel Christian/Jewish cemetery, make of that what you will), where Tim says she was “a little religious.”

And that’s it! That is all we know about Janet Drake in New Earth. Hardly the Mom From Hell, but she isn’t perfect. I’d be interested in seeing some alternate depictions of her within the fandom. 

I’m still gonna eat up Terrible Parents From Hell like a starving puppy dog, though. Just some food for creative thought.