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sanddusted-wisteria · 1 year

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A Builder, a Researcher, and a Rooftop, Ch. 5: C8H10N4O2

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Minor CW/TW: Brief mentions of vomit. It's not too long and nothing visual is described, but if that makes you uncomfortable, skip a couple paragraphs when Qi starts feeling queasy and pick back up when the builder grabs him a glass of water.

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Qi wasn’t on the roof.

Strange.

He would always be here by the time they arrived, no matter how early. And they were late tonight, busy mining more iron to supplement their endless need for steel bars. Maybe he was still working. He had been pretty excited to get his Express Tea Maker today. No doubt he’d be trying to push his work limits. And his caffeine limits. That thought propelled the builder back down to the door of the research center. Hopefully he wasn’t a dried-up, twitching mess on the floor…

They cracked open the door slowly, a little afraid of what they might find. Over by the workbench, Qi was hunched over his notes, writing faster than they’ve ever seen before. His foot was tapping a rapid, irregular rhythm. They could hear him muttering…something…under his breath, too indistinct for them to make out.

The builder carefully drew closer. “Qi…?”

Qi’s head instantly snapped towards them. They froze, suppressing a yelp. “Aha! Builder! You’ve returned, just as I hypothesized! I knew you couldn’t resist the allure of all this lovely science.”

“I…”

“I really must thank you again for the Express Tea Maker. Now even on my normal dosage of tea, I can work exponentially longer!”

“You still drank six cups of–”

“Hardly any side effects too! The greatest inconvenience would probably be the muscle tremors–” He held up his shaky hands. “–so no hazardous chemical experiments, I’m afraid. But still! There’s still so much to do! I also have the occasional headache, and I’ve had more bathroom visits than predicted, probably because I neglected to consider caffeine’s diuretic effects–”

“Hey Qi–”

“–Oh, and a mild wave of nausea every now and again. Nothing…unmanageable…” Qi’s manic energy petered out. He suddenly keeled over, face looking clammy and a hand clenched over his stomach. His knees shook, and he had to lean on the nearby cabinet for support. The builder reached out a concerned hand.

“E-excuse me–!” He shot past the builder and up the stairs with heavy, thumping steps. From somewhere upstairs, they could faintly hear retching, followed by a flush. They winced.

Following him upstairs, they knocked on the closed bathroom door. “You okay?”

“Don’t come in,” came a dull croak, followed by more gagging and coughing. Eeesh. He was probably dehydrated already, and here he was puking his guts out.

They went over to his tiny kitchen to pour him a glass of water. Shuffling through all the neglected dirty dishes, they finally found a cup that didn’t look as dirty as the rest of them. Just as they filled it up, Qi emerged groaning from the bathroom.

“Pardon the damper on our conversation. Anyways, you’re here, so I should give you the fair share of science that you came for,” he said, brushing past the builder and the water they held out to him.

“Hey, you should probably–”

Qi was already back at his workbench. “I know, I know! I need to show you this proof I’ve just finished writing. I was working on it when you were last here. The way it all falls into place…almost like art, if I do say so myself. Except it’s science. So it’s better.”

The builder left the water on his table and hustled after him down the steps, exasperated. Qi, meanwhile, was leafing through his journal. “Where is…what?”

They peeked over his shoulder to see pages full of random scribbles. Sometimes they would be interrupted by an attempt at a drawing, a semblance of a graph, or a vague suggestion of an equation.

“What is all this rubbish…?” Qi muttered. “Did someone vandalize my journal? No, no, that’s physically impossible…” He glanced over at the builder. “Apologies. Again. I’ll be able to show you the proof once I manage to find it…” He kept flipping through page upon page of nonsense, frown growing deeper with each turn.

“Y’know what, bud? Maybe we should just…put this down for tonight,” the builder said, gently but quickly swiping the journal out of Qi’s hands by its leather-bound covers, closing it with a satisfying clap.

“Huh? Wait, what about my proof?”

“Maybe some other time. It’s late and you need water.”

“Late?” Qi looked at the clock. “Ah, nighttime already. Right. I assume that’s the true reason you came?”

“Yeah, but–”

Qi stepped around them and headed for the door, a spring in his step. “Wonderful! I can show you this fascinating piece of space debris that should be passing overhead in a few minutes or so.”

The builder ran ahead in front of Qi, arms spread out to block him from the doorway. “Uh-uh, no. None of that. You need to get to bed.”

“But you came for–”

“Yeah, but now I’m here to make sure your heart doesn’t explode. And also that you don’t shrivel up by tomorrow morning.”

“But the–”

“The science can wait, Qi,” they said, putting their hands on his shoulders and turning him around. “Now off to bed you go. Come on.” They pushed him to go back towards the stairs, while he tried to resist, leaning back and planting his feet.

“Ugh, must we really do this?”

“Yes.”

Qi made several more noises of protest, but slowly started dragging his feet up the stairs. They eased up on their pushing as they went along, Qi finally starting to cooperate and move on his own.

They grabbed the water from where they left it as Qi stalked into his room. They found him at his desk, trying to read one of the many books strewn about its surface.

He frowned as his unfocused eyes drifted across the pages. “I think the withdrawal is starting to take hold.”

The builder handed him the cup. “About time. Drink up, otherwise you’ll be as dry as the sand tomorrow.”

“The way for that to happen is if you cremate my body, builder,” Qi said, rolling his eyes. He drained the cup in one swig and handed it back to the builder.

“Good. Now lie down.”

Qi frowned. “You know that caffeine prevents sleep, yes?”

“Yeah, but you’re gonna crash any second now. Don’t want you passing out and hitting your head on something,” they said as they headed back out to get more water.

Qi sighed, but he was out of arguments. Or any energy to argue. He slipped off his glasses and shoes and tucked himself under his covers. The builder returned with a full glass and pitcher, brushing old papers and books aside on the desk to make room for them. They turned off some of the lights in the room, leaving only the warm glow of the desk lamp on. Satisfied, they took a seat in the chair.

Qi turned over and squinted in their direction. “Are you…just going to stay there?”

“Long enough to make sure you don’t spring up and try to get back to work the second I leave, yeah.”

Qi turned to face the wall, burying himself deeper into his blankets. “Mm. I don’t think it will be too long.” His voice was softer, more sluggish. “Feel free to read something while you’re here, I suppose. Just don’t move my bookmarks, please.”

The builder turned to the random pile of books. Carefully going through the closest stack, they scanned the titles in the dim light. Fluid Mechanics, Differential Equations, Science Weekly, A Comprehensive Listing of Old World Spacecraft… All things they’d expect Qi to read.

But then they started getting stranger. A Detailed History of Concrete? Building a Facade: Scams and Schemes from the Commerce Guilds of the Alliance? Highwind Birdwatching Guide?? Yakmel Ranching for Dummies?? 1000 Things to Do with Sulfuric Acid???

And the strangest one of all, a small volume sitting innocently at the bottom of the pile where Qi probably hoped no one would see: Gazing in Pink I: There’s No Way Someone Like Him Would Like Me!...?!

The builder threw a hand over their mouth to stifle the laugh threatening to burst its way out. Oh, this was rich. They silently picked it up and flipped it open to a random page. The crisp stiffness of the spine and the fresh smell of paper were tell-tale signs that he’d never opened it.

“...He gave me that beautiful, warm smile again… The one that I never felt like I deserved. I was just a lowly optician with a struggling eye clinic. What did he see in me?! Always coming in for eye exams and glasses fittings… How can he afford it?! His insurance has rejected his last 10 claims now!!”

A snort managed to make its way past their hand. Terrified, they looked back at the lump of Qi in his blankets, only to see it slowly rising and falling. He was out cold. Lucky them. They took their hand off their mouth, taking a couple deep breaths to try and filter the giddiness out of their system. Very carefully, they put the peculiar little novel back down and restacked the books. They turned the desk lamp off and left Qi’s room, quietly shutting the door behind them.

Leaving the research center into the barren streets, the sheer absurdity of it all hit them again. They howled with laughter, unrestrained this time, picturing Qi reading that hot garbage like a stiff-nosed scholar, leaving thoughtful annotations in the margins. They cackled all the way home, only stopping after they flopped onto their bed. Hopefully Qi wasn’t having any sordid fantasies about whoever he got his glasses from…

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Builder,

I just left Fang’s clinic. I told him about our Express Tea Maker and the symptoms I was experiencing yesterday. Judging by the odd expression on Dr. Fang’s face and the unusual silence from the bird, I inferred it had to do with my caffeine intake. As much as it pains me to write it, I will no longer be using the Express Tea Maker. Regardless, thank you for your efforts, and for your considerate visit last night. Do remind me to show you my proof in the near future, once I have rewritten it to be readable this time.

P.S.: The literature I have in my collection is STRICTLY for research purposes. I just thought that you might like to know.

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#shady's fics #brr #C8H10N4O2: the chemical formula for caffeine

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your-strangelove · 1 year

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Just felt like saying...

I sat at my bed listening to nothing but the sound of my AC going off and my precious dog snoring for 5 minutes before I realized I wanted to die, not an active death just a slow and gradual acceptance. I looked around the mess of my room all my half-baked purchases strewn here and there board games I’ve never played and most likely never will, books that betray only a surface level interest in their subjects from a entomology field guide to twin books about astrological signs and birth dates, just things I’ve hardly touched in months without ever giving a thorough reading of. None of the feelings I had buying most of these things were nothing more than a transient fantasy and passing interest, I was buying these things just to feel something just a hail mary purchase to kickstart myself in some shape or form. I’ve been a mess for so long and for what? It is fun to write or text or what have you again to be honest. Always talk about trying my hand at fanfiction anything to practice after so long but one way or another I just blank either I can’t decide or I lose all motivation to do so. Hopefully anyone reading this can understand why, I’m exceptionally rusty from sentence structure to even orienting paragraphs, run ons fragments and tedious repetition my writing would be a bore to parse through. So what gas it is that I’d throw out my feelings in a form I don’t even have much faith in, small joys and gaffs have a way of rearing their little heads like that. It is a shame how far I’ve degenerated two of my favourite subjects were cooking and english and I can’t recall the last time I’ve seriously done either and frankly it should make me sadder. I’m so caught up in the repressing the past or fearing the future I don’t do anything in the moment. I’m no stranger to loss right now I’ve lost family and a friend in recent years and I’m not sure if I’ve processed either properly right now and I attribute that entirely to me mourning future losses. They were both fine, hardworking men who deserved much kinder partings if you ask me, my Maternal Great Grandfather and a friend from high school, both died the same tragic way, a slip in the hospital resulting in an injury that left death a mercy, I still remember how my great aunt said they brought him the night before as he had fallen (please pardon the term I’m rather loss for words right now) ill to make him better and hardly a day or so later the family who could see him one last time crying together in the hospital room. My high school friend was closer to my brother but I still wanted him to get better from his treatments his family had suffered so much before and I still remember the last time we hung out with relative clarity I wish I had laughed more at his joke slogan that night it was rather clever, but now I am resigned to laughing only to myself and his memory. Both happened some time ago were I a better or more succinct writer there would be more writing about how I tuned myself out when these losses occurred but honestly at this point I’m not even sure I have empathy to say I was distracted by anything ( I loathe to admit but admit all the same) other than apathy. There is something wrong with me no doubt about that, just not sure if it’s burn out, despair or some grim acceptance, resignation. I don’t have much to me I’ll admit and the only sense of self I cling to are the bits and pieces people have offered me as they still swim in my head. I have a nasally voice, my face is bumpy and I look like I am cold most of the time I also have an upturned nose and my mother’s hair, my family likes complimenting my hair but I can’t recall the last time they have so maybe that has fled me as well. I am immature and lazy frankly not even sure if I could take care of myself or if it’s just weaponized incompetence (it most likely is). No one has told me this but I feel like a lousy friend I enjoy playing victim though so I’m not sure if that would be unfair to say I have a hard time staying in touch with most people and even then I am awfully boring to talk to. Silly and infantile as I am though I have to acknowledge the scant compliments I have received in my life it’s rather easy to remember the few bits of recognition one gets in their life. English was one of my better subjects (at least in High school) I still remember it as one of the first times I got a decent mark on a project (if I’m being honest I never paid attention to grades/report cards throughout elementary so it was a bit of a culture shock going into High School) it was only 9.5/10 so it wasn’t that substantial but it was a collection of Poems I wrote about events and characters in the book, I lacked the foresight to keep them of course and the name has eluded me after so long but there was boats a character named John and he had a love interest I think? All to say I enjoy writing quite a bit another English teacher told me “Stream of consciousness comes easy to you” which is an extremely polite way of saying you can write the first thing that comes to your head and writing it down another teacher (Elementary) said I was good at “taking a short event and writing a lot about it” which really helped out when they ask what i did over vacation and I don’t do much. At graduation an acquaintance (lovely girl sometimes I see her walking about town or hear about her) said she always admired my style which was high praise as she was a beautiful person inside and out (possibly why she elected to compliment someone like me in the first place) We had cooking together that year so I like to believe it was because I raised my utensil to my mouth instead of lowering myself to my food. By all regards I was a pretty shit student I’d say (almost didn’t grad that year but also the year I saw the councillor a bit for suicidal ideation possible TMI but I’ve already typed stuff out I haven’t told my own mother (who I only told of my experiences drunk during New years) this is a fact that should both a. bother me more and b. I should be actively trying to fix. This was a weak (see non existent) transition I’ll admit but that paragraph was stupidly long. I look around my room again and I don’t see me anywhere my understanding of myself is lacking but even worse is my expression of myself this is all I can really try to type out right now but it was nice to be able to write again even if it’s an incoherent mess.

#Vent post #midnight ramblings #long post #personal #I'm chiller now I guess but the underlying issues of this fugue I'm in remain #how do I have a read more thing #is it automatic or

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terrietont · 3 years

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Undertale: A life for a life

When Toriel accidently kills Frisk mid-battle, a devious flower takes control unwarely creating hope among monster-kind for all except one.

Chapter 1: Murder

Shaking, she washed the blood off her paws,It’s crimson red staining her fur. Tears ran down her face endlessly. She couldn’t stop them. There were too many. Her eyes fogged up, barely a blur left in her vision.

Her whole body felt numb as a lump caught in her throat.

‘This isn’t real...’ She thought. ‘This can’t be real!’

Her lips quivered as her breathing quickened. Short inhalations and exhalations, in and out moving at the speed of sound. Her heart was burning against her chest, as if it were about to burrow through her entire body and escape. The numb feeling enveloped her entire body but at the same time the pure and agonizing pain of her heart pulsed against her very soul.

She had done this.

Her mind wandered into dark corners as the water from the faucet continued to flow. Memories flooding back into the dark abyss of her now empty heart. Horrible memories of what she had done.

The boss monster held her breath as the she turned off the tap. She leaned her hands agains the sink, looking down at the floor. Her chest moving up and down slowly. The disbelief of the situation made her dizzy. A bellowing cry escaped the former queen’s snout. She held her wet paws across her face, sobbing uncontrollably.

Toriel kneeled down onto the floor, holding her face tightly, a deep pained frown. Tears ran onto the floor. Sobs accompanied with hiccups escaped.

She realized something horrific as she held her breath.

“I really am no better than him after all” she smiled almost feeling like she was losing her mind. A another wail of horror escaped.

The grief. The tragedy. The horror of what she had done.

It was all true. She had killed the child. The one child that had trusted her enough to call her “mother” and now they had to be buried next to the first human.

A red glowing heart. An aura of red enveloped it. She could barely keep her eyes adjusted to the blinding beams.

The soul was still in tact for now, soon it would crack and disappear. What choice did she have now?

Her paws merely lay under the soul as it hovered above them.

She placed the soul inside a basket-like container, it’s visual presence undetected.

The only proof she had to be seen were the tear stains across her cheeks and the shaking of her limbs.

“I’m a murderer...” she uttered. Toriel leaned her head in her hands, hiding her face.

Flashbacks of her battle with the child enveloped her brain. She couldn’t fathom what she really had done. All the emotional distress was beating her physical form into pieces. She thought she would turn to dust any minute now.

“Hee hee Hee” a voice cackled. Startled, she looked towards the origin of the laughter. It was a flower. A white buttercup with yellow petals and a wide sinister grin. The flower top sat, resting on a thin green stem.

“You really think no one would find out about this?” Flowey laughed with an evil smirk.

Toriel hurriedly got up from her chair and put her hands out in a desperate gesture. “No please it was an accident!” She cried. Flowey’s grin widened.

“Accident? Haha! I KNOW you did it on purpose to try and “protect” the child.” Flowey leaned closer towards the former queen. His eyes going black with white pupils.

“Now look what’s happened...” He began, his voice echoing with poison.

“They’re dead.” Horrifyingly, Flowey’s face managed to mimick a human skull shape.

Toriel tripped backwards, chair falling behind her. Tears began running down her face again.

“Spare me your self pity!” Flowey seethed.

“YOU did this. This is all your fault!” He teased. “And after you tried not to be like him...” Flowey cocked his head to the side with a mocking tone from his mouth.

The reality finally set in. Toriel fell to her knees. “You are right. I am like him.” She wept.

“What are you going to do now huh?” Flowey asked mockingly. “Are you going to continue crying until you dry out into a sobbing excuse of a queen?” His voice was laced with venom as he spoke.

“Or are you going to go to the Asgore and tell him you’re just the same as him and expect forgiveness?”

“Or what if I take the soul instead? You won’t have to worry about it at all!” Flowey laughed. At this point Toriel was holding her head in anguish.

Thoughts, grieving, worries, all of it was swimming around her brain. Her body felt numb.

“No no no no no no no no!” She repeated hysterically. “No NO NO NO NO!” Her tone began to darken, her eyes going almost pure white.

Flowey began to feel uneasy, whether it was the absolute state of Toriel or the fact that the temperature was begining to pick up in the room, he didn’t know. “Shut up already!” He barked at her angrily.

Memories came flooding back for the Queen. A son, a child... a tragedy. “No!” She cried, fire surrounding her this time.

“Asriel... I’m sorry...” She shuddered looking at Flowey. Flowey frowned, his eyes growing with anger. “Shut up! Don’t you dare use that name!” He barked angrily.

Toriel let out a light chuckle, tears running down her cheeks, her eyes now looking bloodshot.

“My child, do not worry”

Flowey growled, gnashing his teeth. “Shut up! Just shut up!”

The Flowey looked towards the basket where the human’s soul was kept in. Vines burst out from the ground as they grabbed hold of the basket, taking the red soul inside.

“Haha!” Flowey cackled evilly. He took hold of the soul in his vines. He smiled deviously.

However without anyone’s knowledge, the soul began to glow brighter, moving closer to the flower. Flowey looked confusedly at it before feeling a sudden burst of energy rush through him. As if it still had the child’s sentience from before, the soul itself had chosen Flowey as it’s host without him even trying.

The power of this determination, the most powerful soul Flowey had ever felt. It rushed through his non existent body so fast and strong he felt almost overwhelmed.

The flower collapsed, dangling from his stem.

This soul was amazing. A power unlike any other. This child was stronger than anyone he had ever seen.

Asriel Dreemurr’s emerald eyes lit up.

A paw reached out to the grieving mother who was on her knees, unable to focus on anything.

“Mom?” The sad voice called out. Toriel turned slowly. What she saw caused the flames to die out.

“Asriel...?” The words were dry on her tongue, as if she didn’t know what she was actually saying.

Asriel looked down at his paws in shock. “I-I- I’m-“ before he could finish he felt a hard squeeze around his entire body. The shuddering mess that was his mother embraced him tightly. The warmth and relief of the hug filled the prince’s eyes with tears.

“Mama...” he cried out soflty. “Mama!” Another cry as he held her tighter. “My baby!” Toriel cried with exasperation.

As he embraced his mother, he felt a warmth in his soul and heard a voice, soft and echoing yet strange.

“Hello” the voice spoke. “I’m sorry” they said soflty. Asriel didn’t know how to respond, especially with the grief of his mother holding him tightly.

“Where’s dad?” Asriel’s tone was more upbeat, but his mother’s reaction was rather downcast. “In the castle.” She replied, hiding her disgust.

“Can we please see him?...” Asriel asked soflty.

Toriel hesitated. She really did not want to see Asgore again, but for the sake of their child, she would swallow her pride and anger for now.

“If you wish, my child.”

Without being spotted, Toriel and Asriel made their way through the underground and towards the capital. Unbeknownst to them, a pair of eyes were watching them from a camera view.

Alphys’s eyes widened. She nearly spat out her noodles all over the computer monitor. “O-oh my god! There’s THREE of them?!” She bellowed.

Asgore was busy minding his own buisiness, watering flowers.

“Dum dee dum” he sang.

Toriel entered the throne room, dreading the voice in front of her, whilst squeezing Asriel’s hand.

Asgore turned around surprised after hearing someone clear their throat to get his attention. “Oh? Is someone there?”

“Howdy! How can I-“ The king backed away a few steps. “Oh my...” he saw his son’s face, his Ex Wife’s patient smile. It all came flooding out.

“M-my boy...” Asgore weeped with a smile. Asriel ran straight to him, beaming with relief. “Dad!” The two embraced longingly. “Tori... you-“ Asgore began looking at the Ex Queen who was frowning worriedly. “Please do not Tori me Dreemurr!” She groaned exasperated.

“Mom please!” Asriel begged, holding tightly onto his father.

“I-I am sorry I just- how did-“ Asgore was at a loss for words, he didn’t know how his son came back, but he did. He was here and that’s all that mattered.

The horror stricken reality sunk into her. She tried to be angry, she tried to be dismissive and show no emotion but she fell to her knees yet again. Her sins were weighing her down heavily.

“I-I cannot take this any longer!” She cried. Asgore looked towards her, stunned and worried. “Toriel...” he uttered soflty.

“I have- I am-“ She hiccuped, feeling completely nauseated by the very words that she would have to say.

Asriel looked horrified as he realized what she was scared of. His soul. This soul... how did he get this in the first place?

He couldn’t remember and yet it was all about to be revealed.

“I have murdered...” Toriel uttered breathlessly. “

The king was taken aback. He couldn’t quite believe what she was saying. She had done something that he had done in the past to make her leave him? If he was unreasonable, he would’ve called her out, he would’ve been angry as to see she had taken the same path as him. But he stood there in shock, concern, fear. He loved her too much to let her feel the pain he had felt once.

“It is going to be okay...” He tried inching closer to her. Her eyes snapped away from him, pushing him back. “Get away from me!” She screamed. Unlike her usual anger towards him, this anger was a mask. A mask hiding pain and grief. This was an obvious mask it wasn’t to keep him away from her... it was to keep her away from anyone.

“I do not deserve your pity...” She seethed, her eyes turned away from him. Her fangs showed, angry and depressed. “After what I did” She began.

Asgore was confused now. She had said she was a murderer, but how so? Who had she killed? How was Asriel alive again? All of these questions plagued his brain.

“Please. You need to tell me.” He urged sternly, paws out in front of him.

“Take care of Asriel. I- I am going home” Her voice was meek and low. She had walked out of the throne room. Asgore desperately wanted to run after her, but he knew that would do more harm than good.

Asriel however was not going to give up so easily. “Mom!” He shouted.

He ran to her as her pace continued ever faster.

“Mom please!”

“Go away!” She yelled back, running away faster. Asriel was able to keep up, getting closer but remaining at a distance. “They know it wasn’t your fault!” He yelled.

Toriel stopped running and stood still, her face hidden from view. By now the two were by the caste hall, an eerie silence washing over them.

“I can feel their soul talking to me.” Asriel continued.

No response. “They say that... you have always been a good mother despite what you did today. They say they love you still”

Slowly, Toriel’s head began to turn back around. “Asriel.” She began.

“Asriel!” Asgore’s voice echoed towards the hallway. He rushed over to his son. “My son?” Asriel looked up at Asgore, glossy eyed. “Dad.” He murmured.

Toriel inhaled sharply and then turned and continued running. “Mom!” Asriel yelled out, a large white paw grabbing his arm, his other arm reaching outwards. “You must let her go, son...” Asgore sighed sadly.

“I’m sorry” he looked down at his child. Asriel’s breathing quickened. All he wanted was to have the family back together again, as happy as before. He was so tired of being a flower, he was so tired of being conflicted between two worlds.

Word got out that the prince of the underground was alive once more. The absolute shock and confusion swept over the citizens. How was this possible? Only Asriel truly knew.

“I hope the bed is as comfy as you remember” Asgore smiled down at Asriel who had himself tucked into his old bed. New home was less silent than it had once been.

“Thank you dad” he smiled in response. Asgore sighed deeply, smiling warmly. “If you need anything, let me know, alright?” The king looked over at his son who was making himself more comfortable in bed. “Will do” and with that, Asgore left the room quietly. His footsteps fading from earshot. Asriel stared up at the ceiling, his breathing slow.

“What do we do now?” He asked. A voice responded. “Are you awake?” A child’s voice asked in an echod trance. Asriel rolled his eyes. “Obviously.” He replied sarcastically. The child chuckled a little, the voice sounding less like a bad thought and more like some kind of weird guardian Angel.

“I just wanted to let you know... I’m okay like this.” The child’s soul admit. Asriel paused in thought for a moment. He couldn’t imagine a world in which living inside someone else’s body as a soul was a good outcome.

“Really, I am.” The soul spoke almost immediately after Asriel thought about it. The young monster’s eyes widened. “A-are you reading my thoughts?” He asked nervously. The soul chuckled almost in a naughty manner. “Maybe...”

Asriel groaned and lay on his side, ear squishing against the pillow. “Great... now I can’t even think without having my privacy invaded.”. “I promise I won’t look into anything personal!” The soul replied almost frantically. “You better not okay? I’m trusting you on this!” Asriel bit his lips.

“You can trust me, friend!” The voice replied, it sounded as if they were smiling as well. “Are we a team?” Asriel asked impatiently. “We’re a team!” The soul answered enthusiastically. Asriel couldn’t help but smile. This soul was warm and comforting. Although being invasive, he knew he was grateful for this soul, the soul that willingly gave itself to him. Why? He would never know.

#asgore dreemurr #asgore #toriel #undertale #asriel #flowey #frisk #fanfiction #undertale fanfiction #asgoriel #undertale au #tumblr’s formatting sucks #pardon for the paragraph mess #undertale: a life for a life

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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 328: Pandora’s Box of Discourse

Previously on BnHA: DEKU TOOK A BATH.

Today on BnHA:

youtube

Also Naomasa grew a beard. Goddamn.

please let this be a cool chapter that plays nice with my ADHD lol

(ETA: lol I feel guilty because a lot of people hated this chapter, but I’m just happy there was a lot of stuff to make fun of, and also that I have another week to work on my backlog of meta posts since the kids were MIA.)

around one month ago?? ah, okay, so we’re gonna find out what was in that Tartarus security file huh

I love that they just randomly set the place on fire

was it necessary to do this in order to escape? no. was it a good idea to set the island they were occupying on fire while they were in the midst of still occupying it? uh. was it cinematic as fuck? fuck yeah

wow it’s a pervert!!

that’s so great that the villains set loose this fine fellow who I’m sure is definitely not a serial rapist. truly the LoV is so noble and misunderstood. they’re just trying to free society from its chains people

oh my god??!

SHANKED!!! oh my god I cheered for Stain before I realized what I was doing. time to have an identity crisis I guess

so he’s all “hey what’s going on.” which, while a respectable question, is something I personally would have waited to ask until I had put a bit of distance between myself and the fiery murder island. but that’s just my personal preference

Stain you really are tenacious I’ll give you that

“what’s the point of escaping prison if you’re not gonna be smart about it” well shit. anyways yeah you’re dead right, society is in the process of collapsing and the outside world is in total chaos, good call there

oh shit

I mean it’s not like we really expecting anything otherwise, but still. fucking brutal. I feel like these guys’ fates were decided the minute that one guy called AFO “scum” back in chapter 94. AFO is unmatched at getting long-term revenge

ahh, was it the security footage??

fdsdfk he’s still alive??

and he’s immediately launching into an inappropriately theatrical monologue even as the darkness closes in on him fdlfksjdlk. you know, was it ever confirmed that the other guy back in chapter 297 was Seiji’s dad? I’m just saying

very impressed that he’s still coherent enough to weigh the pros and cons before making the decision to gamble on giving this info to Stain, who at the very least has his own moral code and isn’t allied with AFO. it was definitely still a risk, but as we now know it was also the right call

what a weird alliance. so Stain tells him that he’ll give it to a just person, and the guy is all,

okay for real though I’m gonna need someone to run a DNA test on this guy. maybe it was some kind of cuckold situation?? the other guy had the family resemblance, but this guy absolutely 100% raised Shishikura Seiji and you are not going to convince me otherwise

anyway, so Stain is all,

PRISON GUARD: “???? ??????? what the hell. what the fuck does that fucking mean. I’m dying here, jesus christ, whatever man fuck you”

(ETA: I kind of feel like this might have been Stain’s last appearance in the manga, given all the fanfare. there’s not really much else he can do for the story at this point, and he seems to have gotten all the character development Horikoshi was planning on giving him. so if this really is it, hasta la vista and good riddance I guess.)

DWLFDKSLDK MEANWHILE, OUTSIDE

(ETA: I feel like this is meant to be evocative of that Sermon on the Mount painting, but in a really fucked up way lol.)

if it were me stumbling upon this scene I would just shake my head and walk right back into the flaming building. not getting involved in that mess. sorry not sorry. I’ll take my chances with the fire, especially given that it’s half-assed neutered BnHA fire lol

blah blah blah and so he decided to pass the info on to All Might -- HOT DAMN, HOLY SHIT

NAOMASA HOLY SHIT. THE APOCALYPSE LOOKS GOOD ON YOU, BOY

“I really like that facial scruff thing Aizawa’s got going on, I think I’m gonna get in on that” yes sir. “also thinking of ditching the tie in favor of the bulletproof vest look. also thinking of getting totally fucking jacked.” good lord. except I’m pretty sure that’s just body armor, but also I don’t care. anyway I should probably stop staring and actually read the fucking speech bubbles here lol

“All Might first handed this information over to Nao, and then went to see Deku, and then came back to Nao” thanks for that tidy little summary Horikoshi. we are capable of piecing events together in sequential order, I just want you to know that. but thank you

“so has Deku finally gotten a bath? also, sucks that Stain saved the day, but what are you gonna do” Nao I missed you so fucking much and didn’t even realize. how am I just now realizing that you are the perfect man

for a second I was gonna ask why Tartarus’s security systems would be cut off from the outside world, and then I remembered that’s a basic security control, and then I actually got impressed by how sensible that is. like, it’s been a while since I could genuinely say that the good guys (excluding class 1-A) did something smart. not that it helped them much in the end, but still

anyway so they’re talking about how AFO was able to coordinate the attack by communicating between his horcrux self on the outside and his ugly peanut-faced self on the inside

huh

okay you have my attention. I am taking notes here lol please continue

ah okay so he says that prior to Jakku, the transfer of information between him and his Vestige self was only one-way. but post-Jakku when Deku was in the hospital, he was able to tell what was happening inside the OFA Radical Lisa Frank Dead People Book Club Realm when he touched him. I feel like we established that before, actually. but he didn’t talk about how it actually felt, though

boy we already know this lol. yes AFO can talk with his horcrux self. and he can also communicate with his little bro in OFA too, let’s talk about that sometime why don’t we. what exactly does that imply, based on the rules we’ve established here

my god I cannot get over Naomasa and his fucking facial hair

no wonder All Might was in such a hurry to leave Deku and get back here

like I have no idea what this radio waves nonsense is but my god, people

that jawline. also so it’s a quirk, I see. except last I checked Deku didn’t have a radio waves quirk, so that doesn’t really explain his connection to AFO. but whatever, hopefully we’re at least getting closer to some kind of reveal here

(ETA: since I sometimes forget that other people’s lives don’t revolve around my theory posts, here are the two relevant links if you by chance want to know my thoughts about this.

Hagakure is still The U.A. Traitor™ regardless of whether Deku is passing information on to AFO through his psychic link, which he almost certainly is.

speaking of said psychic link, Deku is a horcrux.

just posting these now, because whenever trippy OFA stuff happens I tend to get an influx of theory asks. so hopefully this will be a bit of a time saver lol.)

-- wait, what

THAT’S what the recording was??!? holy SHIT. I genuinely was not expecting that. y’all wiretapped his fucking telepathy. fucking quirks, man. wild

AND THEY USED THAT POWER TO DETERMINE WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW, HUZZAH. GOOD SHOW

-- oh shit wait lol, except I forgot we’re not talking about 38 days from the present, we’re talking about 38 days from the date the conversation was recorded. heh. um

yeah that’s the face I would make too if All Fucking Might just casually told me we had eight days left until the end times

oh, pardon me. three fucking days

r.i.p. anyone who thought we were going to have another band arc sob. I sure hope Deku is enjoying that nap

(ETA: I realize people were hoping for a longer rest period here, but given that the man warned us all the way back in chapter 306 that we were entering the final act, you can’t really blame him too much when that turns out to be true. anyway but I do recognize that we’ve reached the point in the story where this kind of discourse is going to become a weekly occurrence, simply because there’s no possible way for Horikoshi’s actual endgame to line up perfectly with the variable headcanons of millions of fans, all of whom have wildly differing and in many cases contradictory expectations which can’t possibly all be fulfilled. anyway, so I’m already bracing myself for that lol. this coming year is going to be a wild ride.)

damn, U.A. out here looking like the motherfucking United Nations

-- is this U.A.?? I actually just realized, U.A. is four interconnected buildings, not two. wait holy shit is this Shiketsu?

wait holy SHIT

based on the overwhelmingly powerful vibes of bureaucratic incompetence, I’m thinking this really is the (future) U.N., or whatever organization it is that deals with international hero stuff

“just let them handle it themselves I’m sure they’ll be fine” yeah okay, thanks guys. appreciate it

wait oh shit did he say that it’s not just Japan?

soooo, what you’re telling me is that AFO is this close to bringing about the end of not just Japan, but the entire world, and you guys don’t think it’s a good idea to help the Japanese heroes stop him? so, genuine follow-up question: are you guys already planning your rich people exodus into space a la Wall-E, and that’s why you don’t give a fuck?? like, what??

omg international heroes

these guys are from World Hoodie Mission, right? is this Horikoshi’s way of reminding me to buy tickets

(ETA: and it worked too lol.)

WHO??? WHAT???

don’t tell me you’re introducing yet another badass new female character for me to fall in love with only to watch as you dismember them and/or blow them up, Horikoshi. I’m getting tired of playing this game my dude. don’t lie and tell me this time will be different. we’re not doing this again goddammit

noooooooooooooooooooo

god fucking dammit lmao. [sighs and rips the previous paragraph into shreds]

on behalf of Americans I apologize for our superheroes always being Like This

I also apologize because I love her already and I’m gonna be shameless about it. so fucking shameless you guys

is her fucking hair red white and blue. it is, isn’t it

this is the volume cliffhanger, 100% lol. it will take every ounce of Horikoshi’s willpower not to put her on the volume cover. he’ll have to settle for the spine or the inner cover this time because Deku VS his class 1-a superpals takes precedence. but it will be a close thing let me tell you

tbh it’s that smile that does it for me. she’s definitely All Might’s protege. get out there and show them how it’s done girl. and maybe call Salaam and BRD and see if you can’t convince them to play hooky from their governments as well. why not. world’s ending in three days you guys. “sorry, I’m busy this weekend” ain’t gonna cut it lol

so while I am not fully caught up with Vigilantes, I have read far enough to know that there’s an American hero named Captain Celebrity whose superpower from what I recall is being a humongous douchebag. and while I haven’t read far enough to know what happens to this guy, I can’t say I’m very disappointed to learn that he’s no longer the number one hero in the U.S. (actually, didn’t they kick him out and that’s why he moved to Japan to begin with?). anyway, so my thanks to Horikoshi for having a marginally higher opinion of Americans than Furuhashi, even though we have definitely not done anything to warrant said opinion lately, and you may have inadvertently opened the door to a pandora’s box of discourse lmao

(ETA: lol I went into the tags and they don’t disappoint. “why is she dressed like a flag” because she’s an homage to Captain America and Major Victory and literally every other character on this list. again, I apologize for fictional American superheroes being Like This. “oh boy another thicc waifu to make the fanboys happy” look, tumblr fandom never seems to have a problem thirsting over Dabi or Tomura or Aizawa or Nao, lol, I’m just saying. “where is Captain Celebrity” idk, probably murdered by the exploding bee cartel, let’s just be grateful for our good fortune and try not to Beetlejuice the man.)

anyway, so let’s see if Horikoshi’s recent character development with regards to making Mineta not terrible anymore will apply to other aspects of his writing as well. I know I was making light of discourse just now, but I do think the complaints about him introducing yet another new character at the 11th hour to be cannon fodder in the final battle are absolutely valid. and again, it wouldn’t be a problem if he didn’t keep maiming/killing off his female characters one by one instead of developing them and letting them kick ass long-term. but that said, I will never complain about Horikoshi adding another female character to the series, regardless of how clumsy the attempt may be. go ahead and pander away, just give us more girl power lol

anyway so we’ll see how it goes, but I think I’m gonna be optimistic and let myself hope once again, even though I’m probably gonna regret it lol. it is what it is. she is standing on an airplane just chilling for fuck’s sake. I’m only human. anyway fingers crossed

#bnha 328 #stain (bnha)#tsukauchi naomasa #all might #stars and stripes (bnha)#all for one #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #eta: how did I forget to type 'bnha' in the title sob

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pocketramblr · 2 years

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I haven't gotten to Legend's games yet so I don't know if him being Zelda's twin is fanon or canon but it gave me the most hilarious idwa of Some Noble sending the local hero (aka. our Legend) to find the royal heir (you can bet he things the boy will be easier to manipulate than Zelda), maybe in exchange for a full pardon. Fun oneshot if L and Z are aware and decide to mess with the noble, fun twist if he only finds out during the adventure.

The status of Legend and Zelda's possible siblinghood is fascinating and will completely depend on what device you play the game on*

But anyway that would be a hilarious if Zelda has to deal with another plotting usurper, only to hear him say he's looking for the lost prince of Hyrule while looking Link in the eye. Not only the one who stopped the last usurper and completely on her side, but also the prince who would rather stay lost. The kids deserve some fun, let em mess with the guy

*so... You opened a pocket ramble. Spoilers for different versions of the same game to follow, ignore this paragraph if you don't want them. Link's Uncle has different versions of his words to ALTTP Link before the adventure depending on what device the game was made for. Some hint more strongly at Zelda and Link being siblings, some don't. It's never stated outright, he never completes the sentence. The options are "Zelda is your...", (Sister? Queen? Duty? Soulmate? Betrothed?), "You are the princess's..." (Only hope? Brother? Destined hero? Last guard?) Or, no words near that at all. "Our people are fated to rescue the princess" (could be a reference to them being in the family the Knights of Hyrule come from and/or being descended from a past hero). So, some of these hint more than others. To my knowledge, there's one manga adaptation that casts Link and Zelda as half siblings, but that was an early adaptation of the first LoZ game and is soooo super not canon. Then you have to remember that Legend is a combined version of two Links- ALTTP hints at possible siblinghood, ALBW very much does not. So it's up to each fan how they want to interpret and use it. Unfortunately, I've seen people convinced fully one way or the other be very rude to people who use the other headcanon :( please don't do that y'all

#i hold that the twin status of Legend and his Zelda should be treated like how i find DfO to be treated #an option in canon that is best never confirmed letting fans flourish both directions and having the option to go either way in fan fic #depending on what works best for them in each story #vive la liberté!#anon #pocket talks to people

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wellntruly · 3 years

Text

Sense8, Season 2, Half the Second + the Finale

In retrospect I really should have listened to my instincts saying I should write up the back half of S2 before watching the film-length series finale, but the problem with that was: I just wanted to keep watching so bad. An error was made! Because there is much to discuss in 2x07-2x11, but it becomes difficult to parcel it out in light of how the conclusion of this show was a 2.5 hour euro-hopping Gotta Get Our Guy epic that was also 3x more of a comedy than the rest of the series—a move I, if you’ll pardon me, L😘VED.

So this is surely gonna be a whole mess to structure, but you know what we’ll try!

Alright, in my recollection, the latter half of Season 2 has three big showdown tentpoles, they are:

- Wolfgang v. Lila (Cluster v. Cluster) - Dani v. Hollywood - Sun v. Bro

There is other stuff going on too of course, like Capheus being swept into whole ass political warfare (again!), and the thing where Will is actual-pants circling a heroin addiction from his time evading Whispers. This rules honestly, I like outcomes. And also affords us a really great Will/Kala scene, honestly one of my favorite pair-ups for both of them. Kala has this very open and thoughtfully distracting way of being a damsel in distress, where it’s like she just arrives and goes I’m having a personal issue, and I am trying to deal with that, but you’re about to do something very stupid so I had to come over here, and now we both need to help each other. And of course on Officer Little Spoon, that’s basically all he’s ever wanted to hear. I can both help and be helped simultaneously, my dream!

The different things that come out of different cluster combinations is one of my favorite, favorite things about this show. I’m a nerd who loves thinking about the mechanics of storytelling, and a premise where we always have seven other people who could arrive to contextualize a character’s circumstances feels like I’ve been given the biggest writing snack box I've ever seen. Anything you want to have happen, there’s someone who can get that going for you. Anything you’re curious about with a character, there’s someone who can open that door. This is a truly, truly character-driven show, which I believe is why [behind the scenes clip] I have been struggling trying to write this post by plot instead of characters this time. It just doesn’t work that well with Sense8, that’s not how it’s built. I mean here I was trying to frame this around three main plot beats of the second half of S2, and in less than a paragraph I’m getting waylaid into talking about my favorite cluster pairs and how & why they work the way they do!

For instance, if you ask me one of the all-time combinations, for just the pure Sense8 vibes of them, is Riley/Sunnnn, Riley/Sun! I think it’s because they are able to just be tired with each other in a way neither of them fully are with anyone else. So although they’re a melancholy pair, they’re also one of the most relaxed, and it has a relaxing effect on us too—something of that base Zen I was trying to describe back at the beginning.

Some SUBLIME Sun/Lito material in the back half of S2 too. Both raucously and poignantly juxtaposing one another, sometimes all at the same time, the way they always are together ("and she's not crying the same way that I'm not SCREAMING!") I could quote whole swaths of their new crying scene here with Lito flung on her bed with the stuffed animals, but I will refrain!

But Sun is like salt: she brightens every other sensate she's paired with. That’s part of what makes her such an ideal focal point for another big cluster collab to center around this season. The other appeal is that Sun getting to fight at a gala means she’ll be doing so wearing something incredible. Did I know it would mostly be just silver metallic booty shorts and kicky ankle boots? Well I could never have dreamed.

Nor could I have dreamt up Detective Mun, one of the few times a character is introduced just to be a love interest where you’re like oh but TOTALLY babe. I was pretty on board with him from when he showed up at her teacher’s house, but when he next appears in his hoot of a graveyard groundskeeper disguise, then proceeds to spar with her all through the tombstones because he knows that will make her feel better, and then literally a single tear drops out of this man’s eye when he gets one kiss from her, uh. I shipped it. A lot. God get his handsome ass, Sun.

Speaking of handsome asses!!—I will be yelling “FROM QUEER TO ETERNITY!” for the rest of my goddamn life. Oh…my fucking god. Mexico City sure has a hell of a run here, but when is Mexico City NOT having a hell of a run, I ask you! Listen I had been waaaaaaiiting for Daniela to become Lito’s agent, oh howww had I been waiting. She needs a job and he needs someone to get him a job, and clearly she was going to be a NATURAL at it. DOUBLE FISTING HER & HERNANDO’S CELLPHONES LIKE THE LATINA MALCOLM TUCKER, I’m in love.

I do have a sliiiight question though. In this Mexico…did Y Tu Mamá También not come out like fifteen years earlier? Did not Gael García Bernal and Diego Luna go on to become huge stars, careers very not tarnished? Did not Gael García Bernal—whom we’ve confirmed canonically exists in this timeline!—then even make La Mala Educación with Pedro Almodóvar also?? Fuuuuck wait Lito needs to make an Almodóvar are you KIDDING me, that’s your new hugely emotional gay niche buddy!!!!! But really though, not to get side-tracked: is the Mexican film industry really that homophobic? I mean yes, Mexico is a very conservative country, but like, so is America. Yeah of course I can see a situation where say, none of the Marvel stars would be “allowed” to be out because for massive action movies you need to make massive profits in order to make back the production costs, and so you don’t want to risk ostracizing conservative America and conservative China, so sure, with the Latino machismo thing in play as well, can totally see why Lito coming out would mean he couldn’t keep making the kind of mainstream het-flicks that had been his bread & butter. But for his whole agency to drop him??? In the county that has produced three filmmakers who between them have won 50% of the Oscars for best directing of the past ten years?? That is where I’m starting to get the feeling this might have been a bit…much. But y’know, by the other hand we sure had São Paulo Pride, so it’s completely not that this show is acting like you just can’t be gay in public in Latin America. Perhaps, like most everything, it’s just a complex situation. Perhaps there’s some truth here, as well as some exaggeration, like a lot of TV and movies, from a lot of different countries.

Hey I got another question! But this one is a world-building thought experiment I’ve become rather fixated on. You see I’m really curious over how this whole other cluster of Lila’s seems to be evil, as they are all helping her with what she’s doing. How does that come about. Are clusters just naturally similarly morally oriented to one another pre-connection, or is it more that after rebirth they might start moving toward one another in a heightened kind of groupthink. What if one member of our cluster had been like I Want To Be Bad News, would the rest of them just be like aw lame, black sheep of the family, or could they have been swept into it too? Like could the tendency toward sensorium groupthink be really dangerous, something you’d need to be careful about, to guard your cluster against being infected by an Idea. I’m fascinated by this possibility.

I guess if our cluster were going to be pulled toward darker behavior, it would probably have to be by Wolfgang, but part of what’s fascinating about HIM, is that just simply is not going to be happening on his watch. His loyalty drive is so interesting. He just woke up one day connected to these people and was like okay yeah I’ll lay down my life for you weirdos. I mean the whole Lila thing even happens because Wolfgang wants to just take care of this for the group, make sure no harm or worry comes to them regardless of what might happen to himself. Meanwhile everyone in his actual life he’s like, we have nothing between us Actually, sorry. Associates, randos, family—all the same. The big blinking exception of course is single solitary Felix, who is basically the model for how he’ll treat his clustermates.

Yet all that said, I was fucking staggered by the turn of the S2 finale. I REALLY had not expected Wolfgang for a kidnapped role! This is honestly an avant-garde choice. I mean to quote Jerah Milligan talking about The Old Guard: “—first of all, I knew that white dude was getting kidnapped. I don’t know why. I was like, something about him seems too nice: they gon’ get him. [laughs]” Because that’s how it usually goes!! But Wolfgang ISN’T nice in that kidnappable way, at all. Though admittedly I guess by this point we’ve already strapped down every other available white person to a bed at some time. And, as discussed, Wolfgang is a dramatically interesting choice because his cluster safety prioritizing instincts mean he will have approximately one hair’s worth of resistance to overcome to the idea that he should just take himself out, like their mom, before the Cannibal can eat through him to them. Wolfgang comes with his own self-destruct timer, basically.

Anyway this plot really is at its core the very same shape as The Old Guard, which does make me wonder: what is it about queer, multi-racial, supernatural-inflected action projects and the plot driver of “they took one of our people for Torture and we are going to get them back.”

For that is the simple and spicy gambit that kicks off the events of S3! Or the condensed feature we got of it, at least. No matter, nosebleeds and pained panting for everyone! Highly effective measure to bring everyone together, and quickly. I acknowledge we needed to keep tumbling forward for that sense of urgency, so I’ll just imagine in my head the missed moments of them all reeling a bit at finally touching one another for real [tiny scream]. And, Lito finally telling Hernando and Dani!!!!! In the most traumatizing possible circumstances good job baby.

Perhaps odd that from all this angst the final few hours would turn out to be so funny, but oh my god were they, and oh my god Yes.

Where even to begin. Well here’s one: There’s no way I can prove this but I never believed Jonas was dead and guess what. Meanwhile I *had* believed he’d turn out to have always been the goodest of guys, but was absolutely exhilarated by his steady development into this mild-mannered enigma no one can make heads or tails of anymore. Schrödinger's ally. This conversational sensorium Fae where you truly don’t know if he’s here to help you or harm you at any given moment, but everyone has just accepted him as part of the ecosystem. He shows up and they’re just like, aw jeez. Literally Nomi when he first reappears: “I didn’t think I could be any more confused by you, but congratulations, you found a way.” Literally Will by Jonas’s last pop-up appearance in the finale: “OhPLEASE Jonas not now!” Incredible.

The thing is, Lana Wachowski can DO funny. She can direct these totally kick ass, cinematic, big ol heroics fight scenes one episode, and then the next an action sequence as perfectly human and hilarious as that disorganized scramble up and back down the rooftops of Paris, that had me wheezing. Oh my gOD. Nomi suddenly running back to save Amanita even though that’s SO stupid, Lito immediately haring after her yelling “Family we’re coming!!”, meanwhile Jonas just does a runner off the other edge and Will’s like ahhhfjafd, and slips trying to go after him. Overjoying. And that’s all before we got to the tour bus Trojan Horse scene, A G I F T. Me in my notes, visibly losing it: “Asian tourists Sun and Mun are MURDERING me, Lito looks EXACTLY LIKE SUFJAN STEVENS, Felix has a bandanna holding back his bangs and is cowering with Wolfie in pastel denims—help help help help”

There really seemed to be a deliberate choice to make the finale more comedic, which just to reiterate, I am aaaall about. Humor does not have to come at the expense of drama or stakes! Imo it often enhances them.

I also feel there were a couple character notes given out before the finale got underway. One, make Capheus a blast and a half—dang you did it! He is so fun in “Season 3.” Sort of a return to how happy-go-lucky he was in S1 before the weight of the world really started coming down on his shoulders, but also just a little bit of a reconfiguring as well. He became super effusive, basically, the kind of person who immediately upon meeting him is going to sweep Felix up in his arms for a big laughing bear hug. He’s basically become the cluster’s wise himbo, if that’s not a contradiction in terms, and it’s a welcome energy.

The second was the reboot of Rajan back to the absurdly sweet goober he was in S1, something that allowed for a HUGE development to unfold, which we are at last gonna get to.

Rare for a male character, I appreciate that Rajan has gone through three distinct styling looks over these three seasons, which I will call The Hair, The Cut, and The Beard. 1 and 3 are good! Interestingly, Rajan the character is bad in S2 too—connection?? But honestly somehow Rajan had slid from being the crushingly sincere dreamboat who planned a whole dance number to do for his wife at their wedding, to this distracted pharma husband whom I was pretty certain was involved in whole scale political racketeering. The reveal that he was actually helping uproot some political racketeering does work I guess, but what works the most is having him show up in Paris in a little scarf being baffled while cradling scientific equipment someone’s handed him to his chest with both arms. Well this man is back to being adorable, I thought, and I am SO supportive.

The thing is, The Hair was always great, and The Beard is him but more. He’s kind, he’s funny (the only utterance of “My wife!” I have ever burst out laughing at), he’s usefully loaded, and he almost always meets new circumstances with that combination of curiosity, factual reasoning, and open-mindedness that I think of as a marker of all good scientists. It is no wonder to me at all that Kala spent the finale realizing she really does love this dude, nor after processing it for 1.5 seconds, am I at all surprised that Wolfgang was like wait hang on, can I like him too? Wolfgang Brogdanow, who has been turning his mouth towards the mouths of other men since Orgy 1, was so imminently suited to be like hey, now that I’ve met him and he’s fucking cute, a Thought: do you guys wanna party. What if we’re over the love triangle, what if the threesome is what we do.

AND SO THAT’S JUST WHAT WE DID. I whole-heartedly approve, wow suddenly I'm invested in Kala/Wolfgang now that it's this!! Plus Lito & Hernando decided to have some sexy make-out fun with Dani, a very hot and adorable choice as well.

Because Sense8 said OBVIOUSLYYY we’re ending with another big queer sense-orgy come on, come on. The final shot will be a pan over the newlywed lesbians’ discarded strap-on then a cut to “for our fans,” fuck yes and good NIGHT.

And a final round of loose notes I’d jotted down:

wait Neets has THREE dads??? I just thought she had two!

the thing is by this point I look at Wolfgang and am like, I’d give you a kidney

OBSESSED with the Ikea glass of water next to the blockers in the abandoned church

Hernando and Dani are having strawberry margaritas and Lito just walked out in a onesie

man, I should just try to be the Amanita I want to see in the world

“I’m not saying it’s not natural—though, let us remember that cancer is natural, so naturalism itself should not be considered a virtue—” Kala I love you

~*Iberian Dreams*~

forever entranced with Sun’s teacher handing her a carpetbag and saying he packed her some clothes, and then literally every new scene of her for the rest of the series she is wearing the coolest high end fashion piece you have ever seen in your life. sir!?

y’know what Brian J. Smith is doing a good job here, the boy’s been a wreck since the moment he entered the hallway

god every golden hour shot in India, the colors…

their crowd scenes are so intense because they really get the CROWD, and it FEELS different

every time Will tries to say he’s a cop…shhh honey please, shh no please

I *love* them all piling up together behind the car, the choREOgraphy

Kala like excuse me, can I just, and reaching right into Sun’s bra: we love it

OPENLY WEEPING OVER THIS NOMI/NEETS PROPOSAL

oh I was TRULY WONDERING if we were ever going to go back to how much Wolfgang loves singers but is afraid to sing! wow remember when it seemed like that was gonna be his thing.

Jonas would be reading Proust

me at a certified killer, armed: “Barefoot biscuit, this is never gonna work”

wait they’re finally speaking Hindi what the fuck!!

well at least it happened for a moment!

yeessss Dani

yeeeeeesssss Dani

fuck I love this show people are always saying shit like “I’m the Speaker of the Archipelago”

doing it at a club is delicious. Milton is literally leashed.

aww, I just realized our cluster is an orphan 😩

everything Max Mauff does with his body in this Wolfie reunion scene caused me to make a convulsive gesture with my hands. good show buddy, wow

my favorite Lila is no question Italy Endures Lila

Puck’s hair thing, is so weird, I’m obsESSED

honestly big ups to everyone’s boyfriends for their rapid up-take of this: Hernando, Rajan, Mun, Felix—this one’s for you, boys!

Wolfgang teaching Rajan through Kala and finding this oddly enjoyable…I don’t know if we skipped past the part where they’re all okay with it but I love the world where they’re all okay with it

I’m so glad we get to end this with a big gay wedding

a big gay wedding set to the Magnetic Fields??!? are you doing this to me right now!

the AMOUNT of poly threeways happening here!! I mean just two but that’s an astonishing number. out of six!! that’s a third!!

anyway everyone in this cluster is the guidance counselors from Caleb Gallo, but especially Lito and Hernando

Will: You guys are in like a three way…relationship? Lito: It’s called a throuple we’re in a throuple. Hernando: We’re in a gay-centric semi-nonsexual throuple with us and Daniela. Will: Will: What is— Hernando: It means we don’t have sex with her as often as we have sex with each other, but we do love her and she does live here and she’s in this relationship. Lito: She’s in this relationship.

(Kala, leaning forward from where Rajan and Wolfgang are nibbling each of her ears (they just cheerfully fall forward into the space she’s vacated to keep making out behind her): “Wait can you repeat this?”)

#UPD8 #at last #Sense8

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suite43 · 3 years

Text

(summary: starscream and bumblebee have an argument, and turn to trusted friends for some advice. or: several long and winding paragraphs about love, redemption, and what we are worth. alcohol warning.)

"Be honest with yourself," Starscream sneered. "If we hadn't been forced together, do you really think you'd give a scrap about me?"

"Why does it matter?" Bumblebee shot back.

"Because, Bumblebee, you're wrong. You think you care, you think you're in love with me, but you're not. You were forced to be around someone you hated and you had to find some way to be okay with it because you're a good little autobot and you overcompensated. You're a victim of proximity. We both are. But y'know what? You're free now, so go ahead and run along back to your life and your friends and people you actually give a shit about beyond finding the moral high ground and leave me alone."

"Unbelievable," Bumblebee muttered. "You're unbelievable! Do you know how to do anything except wallow in denial? What is your fucking problem?"

"My problem at the moment is that someone was deluded enough to think he could squeeze millions of years of monstrosity out of me by telling me he loved me."

"Primus, Starscream, if you're not interested just say so! If you're angry, if you're scared, fucking say it! But you don't ever get to tell me how I feel!" Bee was screaming up at Starscream, pain and frustration radiating from him. "I don't know where I'd be if things were different and I. Don't. Care. I like my life, Starscream. Despite everything, I'm happy with it and I'm glad you're in it! Apparently you aren't, and if that's true you can leave! You've always been free to go whenever you fucking feel like it! But you haven't! So pardon me for assuming you had something going on in that thick fucking head of yours!"

"Oh, please-"

"No! Shut up! I'm not done and for once you are going to listen to what I have to say! You try so hard to convince everyone that you've got some black heart, that all you are is violence and malice, and I know that's not true! Whether you want to believe it or not I've seen what you're capable of! I know you, you let me know you, and I decided that I fucking love you and I'm willing to keep loving you even when you're a cruel, stubborn bastard. If you really want to leave, leave! Go! But don't run because you're afraid, or because you think I don't know what I'm getting into."

Starscream didn't say anything, just stewing. Bee tried to collect himself, mentally urging Starscream to just fucking say something.

"You don't know me."

"For fucks sake, Starscream," Bumblebee sighed and decided fuck it and gave into his impulse, pulling Starscream by his collar down into a kiss. He was frustrated and Starscream was caught off-guard, so it was messy and clumsy and awkward, but after a beat Starscream grabbed his helmet and pulled him into it harder and Bee nearly forgot he was ever angry in the first place.

It felt like a million years had passed when they finally pulled apart and Bee let his heels fall back into the ground. Starscream stared down at him, face unreadable.

"Sorry," Bee said, barely even whispering, hands settled on Starscream's chest. "I just. How do I prove to you that I mean it?"

"You can't," Starscream responded, pulling away from Bumblebee's touch. Bee just watched him go.

He sighed. Starscream would be back when he was ready. Or he wouldn't. Either way, Bee would be here.

///

"Are... Are you okay, Starscream?" Thundercracker asked, peeking out the door to the balcony.

"I'm fine."

"Um... Why are you on my roof?"

Starscream was sitting cross-legged on the roof of Thundercracker's apartment, staring off into the distance, one hand held over his mouth in thought, fingers idly tracing his lips as he couldn't drag his mind away from flittering fancies of Bumblebee and kisses and love. Thinking about dozens of late-night conversations and well-meaning gifts of cheap high grade and the way he laughs and the way he looks beautiful even when he's angry and- hm.

"You know about things, don't you, Thundercracker?"

"Most people generally agree the answer to that question is 'no', but. Maybe? What kind of things?"

"What does it feel like to be in love?"

"Oh. That kind of thing. Uh," Thundercracker climbed onto the roof awkwardly, pulling himself up next to Starscream, legs kicking where they dangled off the edge. "You know I don't really mess with all of that, right? Dating and stuff. I don't do it."

"But you know things," Starscream said. "You're better with feelings then anyone else I know."

"Not true," Thundercracker said. "You know Bumblebee!"

"That's exactly the problem, Thunders."

"Oh. Oh." Starscream could almost hear the gears turning in Thundercrackers head as he connected the dots. "Are you in love with Bumblebee?"

"No. Yes. I don't know. If I knew I would know what to do about it and I wouldn't be here asking you for romantic advice now would I?"

"I suppose."

"So then how am I supposed to know?"

"If you're in love?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I've never been in love. I don't know. But, in the movies, it's like... Usually two people kind of get stuck together in some kind of situation, y'know, they meet and they don't really like each other much at first. But then you think about them all the time. And then you keep running into them, and even when you think they're annoying, something about them is still kind of endearing. They make you happy. And then there's some big fight or misunderstanding or somebody gets scared or has to leave and it looks like nothings going to work out, but eventually they decide that they like being around each other enough that it's worth working out whatever they fought about or giving up whatever's keeping them apart, and then, happily ever after, I guess."

"Just like that, huh?"

"Only in the movies. There's no end credits in real life."

"So what happens next, then?"

"I guess just what happens with every other kind of relationship. You keep being happy and working and then fighting and deciding its worth trying again over and over until you give up or somebody dies."

"Unfortunately I don't think death is a viable reprieve for my situation."

"Oh yeah, I guess not. Sorry."

"No, it's okay. He's easier to tolerate when one of us is dead."

"I guess the question, then, should be, is he worth it to you? Are you going to get off the plane to Santa Fe or New York or Chicago and run back to him, or are you gonna go be a well-respected but no-fun businesswoman in the big city forever?"

"What?"

"Sorry, I think I got lost in the metaphor," Thundercracker laughed, a big, booming thing, clumsy and well-meaning and earnest, just like the mech it came from. "Something in there was probably good advice, though. You should ask me things more often."

"I really should," Starscream sighed, leaning over and laying his head in his trinemates lap. Thundercracker didn't stop him, and let one hand fall to rest on Starscream's midsection, just to say I'm here when you need me so Starscream can reply I know, Thank you, I'm sorry by taking that hand in his and squeezing it lightly. They watched the stars twinkle across the horizon as lazy clouds sauntered by, and Starscream started to wonder about what he was worth.

///

Bumblebee trudged into Maccadam's, his normal sunshine dampened by how just miserable and unfair everything seemed. He took his usual spot at the bar and ordered a drink, half as strong as usual so he'd have to spend twice as much money if he wanted to do something stupid, letting his thoughts brew around as he sipped.

"Hey, bigshot! How did it go?" Wheeljack slung his arm around Bee's shoulder, energetic as ever, but Bee just groaned and slammed his head into the bar.

"Terribly."

"Weelllll," Bee could practically feel Wheeljack trying not to say 'I told you so'.

"He's just. Agh!" Bee said. "He was just himself, y'know, determined to be as difficult as possible and allergic to his own happiness. And I yelled at him, which I probably shouldn't have done, and then I kissed him, which I definetly shouldn't have done, and now he's probably never going to even look at me again."

"Well, y'know what they say, fortune favours the bold and all that!" When Bee gave Wheeljack a skeptical, dont-try-to-make-me-feel-better kind of look, Wheeljack just doubled down, squeezing his shoulders. "Seriously, you shot your shot! That's all you can do, and if he didn't want you that's his loss!"

"He was scared, Wheeljack. I know him, I know that that's his fucked up defense mechanism or whatever and I knew he was gonna try to drive me away. Why did I let him drag me into that?"

"Because you care, Bee. You care a lot. You aren't the kind of person who can see somebody struggling and just leave them to it. You're like, literally incapable of not lending a hand. Especially when you love somebody."

"So then why the hell did I have to fall for the hardest to love cybertronian there is?"

"Oh, I'm sure there's been worse.I mean, Nova-"

"Not really the point."

"Oh. Because you have horrible taste?"

"That's more like it," Bee grinned. "Cheers?"

"To shit taste!" Wheeljack agreed, clinking their drinks together.

"Absolutely."

They left the bar a bit later, neither of them really drunk so much as in the zone, as Wheeljack liked to put it. It was right before you got too drunk to really do anything sensible but drunk enough that you didn't overthink things, and it was just the right level of alcohol consumption to go for a walk and talk about life.

"So, what're you gonna do then?" Wheeljack asked after the conversation had trailed off.

"About what?"

"Starscream. Y'know, I don't think he's very good for you."

"I dunno," Bee shrugged. "And i know. I know nobody thinks he's a good person but he tries, Wheeljack. He really does! He just, he's scared. All the time, I think, of everything. He doesn't trust me, or you, or anyone at all, and I hate it. I hate that he feels like he can't trust me, even after all the stuff we've been through. It makes me mad! Not even mad at him, just mad at- at- I dunno, at the universe, at the war, at Megatron, at every shitty thing that ever happened that made him feel like he needs to be afraid all the time. I want him to be safe. I want to make him feel safe. But I dunno how and he won't tell me, and how can I tell him my stuff if he won't tell me any of his, and if we never tell each other anything then it's not all that much of a relationship."

"I mean, what do you even want from someone like that? He's not got a lot to offer. I mean, he's kinda hot if you squint, I guess, but other than that?"

"I think 'kinda hot' is the understatement of the century, Wheeljack. But... I dunno, I just. Want something. I want him to be able to tell me he cares about me. I know he does. But I want him to say it. I want it to be real."

"Why? You're a good person, Bee, it's not like you don't have options."

"Because I'm happy when he's around. I feel more like myself. I feel like my life is better when he's in it. For better or for worse, he's got a perspective nobody else does, and he always comes up with things I'd never even think of. He's smart and observant and funny just as much as he's a wise-ass and a smug bastard. For every inch of him that's irritating there's another bit that's incredible. And a lot of that incredible feels like our little secret, like he only lets me see those parts of him, and I like that too. And, I dunno, I get to be angry and there's nothing wrong with it. He's never mad that I'm mad, he never tells me that getting pissed is a waste of time or energy, he just lets me be. He argues, but he doesn't try to stop me or make me be polite and friendly because he doesn't need or want me to coddle him. I like the idea of taking care of him because it's less actually taking care and more just. being there, and letting him do the rest. I share my input and he gives his, and eventually he comes to the answer on his own and I get to see him being better. He gets better because he wants to, not because I'm forcing him to."

"I guess I just don't get how Starscream becomes a better person without you dragging him into it."

"People are fundementally good, Wheeljack. Don't look at me like that! It's true! Everyone wants to be loved, and really we all want to do good so we feel worthy of being loved, but it's about opportunity. When your needs aren't met, it gets harder and harder to do good. When everyone around you treats you with cruelty, it gets harder. When everyone believes you're a monster, why even bother trying to prove them wrong? All it takes is one opportunity, one chance to do the right thing, one person to say I know you know what's right for someone to take a step in the right direction. I didn't do anything to him, I just. I tell him what I know, which is that he doesn't enjoy who he became any more than the rest of us, and I give him space to know that even when it's scary and even when he loses everything, I'm on his side. Even the worst of us can improve given the chance. I really do believe that. I mean, you were at Megatron's trial. He opened the matrix. If that guy, given the opportunity, decided to turn himself around, why can't Star?"

"Did you kiss him and then yell at him or yell at him and then kiss him?"

"What?"

"Earlier, when you said you guys fought. Was it all like 'oh im in love with you' and then you kissed and then you fought afterwards? or was it like 'oh we're fighting by the way I love you' and then you kissed?"

"Uh, neither. I told him I was in love with him and he told me I wasn't and that made me really really angry, and I'm not even sure why honestly. And then I kissed him, to uh, prove I meant it, I guess? Not my best idea."

"Maybe you're just tired of being told what to do."

"I think I just don't like other people telling me what I am. I know what I am. I'm Bumblebee!" He took a deep breath and started yelling. "I'M BUMBLEBEE! I'M ALIVE AND I'M IN LOVE! AND I KNOW WHO I AM!"

"HELL YEAH!" Wheeljack threw his arms up, just enjoying the act of making noise as they wandered back to Bee's apartment, and eventually the two of them devolved into pointless hollering and whooping, until someone somewhere through a little chunk of metal and bonked Bee right in the back of the head with a SHUT THE FUCK UP! and the two of them just started laughing, both trying to shoosh the other as they eventually made it into Bee's apartment and Wheeljack settled on the couch, barely sparing a muffled g'night buddy before passing out, leaving Bee alone to stare out the window and think about what he wanted.

///

Bee rolled out of bed the next morning to the sound of a knock at the door, rubbing at his eyes, wincing at the too-bright sunlight. He wandered past where Wheeljack was snoring on the couch, muttering a yeah, yeah, I'm coming, to the door as the knock came again, less sure of itself this time.

He wasn't really sure who he expected to be at the door. But it both was and wasn't a surprise to see Starscream standing there.

"Bumblebee." He said plainly.

"Uh, good morning," Bee responded. "What's, uh, what's up?" Ah, that felt like the lamest possible thing he could've said. Nice one, Bumblebee.

"I... I want to apologize."

"You... what?"

"I'm sorry," he muttered, hands clasped in front of him, not meeting Bee's eyes. "I. For everything. I'm sorry I'm impossible. I'm sorry I'm cruel. I'm sorry I'm petty. I'm sorry for my ego and my selfishness and for how I only drink the most expensive wines, even when you buy me the cheaper ones. I'm sorry because I know that none of this is going to go away and I'm going to have to keep apologizing over and over and it's going to get old. I'm sorry for doing every possible thing I can to drive you away and I'm sorry you're not stupid enough to fall for it because your life would be a hell of a lot easier if you would. This isn't easy. And I could stand here and apologize for hours and I still wouldn't hit everything, but, but. You're... I'm missing my train for you, okay?"

"Uh. You lost me on that last bit."

"Thundercracker's advice only comes through rom-coms, so, sorry for that too, I guess."

"It's okay. Uh. Thank you for apologizing. And I'm sorry, too. I'm sorry that I'm stubborn, I'm sorry for yelling, I'm sorry that I'm touchy and pushy and too much in all the ways you aren't. I'm sorry I always have to feel like I'm winning, I'm sorry about all my moral grandstanding, I'm sorry for all the ways I make you feel like a bad person. I'm sorry for the days that I don't have the patience, and I'm sorry for the days I have too much and it makes you mad, and I'm sorry I thought I could make you love me in the way I wanted just by pulling hard enough."

"It's okay. It's... It's okay."

"Are we... are we okay?"

"Yeah. I think so. For now. And if we aren't later, then I think we can figure it out." Starscream let his hands seperate, and Bee reached out to take them in his own, intertwining their fingers.

"Okay."

"Only if you want to. I know I'm not easy."

"Neither of us are easy. But that's okay. I meant what I said. I know what I'm getting into. If you think we can figure it out, I'd like to try, at least."

"I think I can do that. I can try."

"You wanna start by kissing me properly?" Starscream's face flushed bright pink.

"That sounds as good a place to start as any."

#red.doc #starbee #sorry for still not properly posting things to like. a website. this is the best ur gonna get beloveds #anyways. this was much much shorter and then i added the TC segment and got carried away #the tc bit is my favourite bit btw. its good.

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mariamermaid · 4 years

Text

Confessions

Neville Longbottom x Hufflepuff reader

Summary: You start receiving small letters from an unknown writer, who confesses his feelings for you.

Words: 2.9k

A/N: Requested by anonymous: “Can you do a Neville Longbottom x hufflepuff reader where Neville confesses his feelings to the reader via letter. Thank you💗”

My dearest,

I must confess.

Time stood still and all you did was stare at the small note, you found in your notebook. Monday morning and knowingly, you had completely screwed up the exam the week before, your mood wasn´t the finest. You had noticed the pile of papers on Snapes desk immediately when entering, and very aware of what was to come, you couldn’t get more frustrated. Now two full lessons of talking about the exam and all the answers you had messed up, awaited you.

But things took a little turn for you; when opening your notebook, you found a small piece of paper, neatly folded once. The two bare sentences brought utterly confusion upon you, especially the missing signature. You also didn´t know who´s handwriting it was.

Snape hurried through the rows of students dreading what was about to come and slammed the exam on your table. You flinched at the sound, but didn´t bring your eyes up to stare at him.

Confess what?

Monday dragged along and even by the end of the day, where you found yourself more tired than ever crawling in your bed, you hadn´t made any progress in finding out who the sender was. Leanne and Hannah, your roommates found it amusing at first, your quietness had struck them by a similar surprise. But as the three of you followed your bedtime routine, that you usually spent to catch up, they started to worry.

“It´s nothing”, you assured them, not wanting to talk about the note quiet yet. It wasn´t anything, you told yourself. Two sentences, barely at last, it didn´t mean anything. Maybe it wasn´t even meant for you.

Thursday afternoon; you offered tutoring to some of the younger students in the library. Spencer, a ridiculous hyper Gryffindor student, who had problems with focusing, slid back and forth on his chair. After two months of tutoring him, you were already used to him.

“Try to write this paragraph on your own and remember your key notes, I´ll check it then”, you explained to him and he nodded quickly. But after two minutes of him frantically writing, he turned the page in his book and stopped abruptly. You looked up from your own book about vanishing spells, to find Spencer with a small note in his hands. He looked confused on the piece of paper, until you took it from him. It looked identical to…

Lately, things have changed.

It is undeniable for me anymore.

You took the note, hiding it away. How did it end up in Spencer´s textbook? Trying to hide your blush at best, you advised Spencer to continue, but later on, you took his paper with you. You had to proofread it in quietness, not with that new note on your mind. When hurrying out of the library, you stumbled right into Neville. “Y/n sorry-“

“Don´t worry about it, it was my fault, but I have to go. See you around Neville!” You exclaimed quickly, rearranging the papers and books in your arms and then hurrying off. You cursed at yourself for running into Neville, he was a close friend of yours, but with a riddle to solve and a heart beating too loud, you left the library. Neville watched you leave, his eyes not leaving your figure and the ever-smallest hint of a smile crawled upon his lips. Maybe his idea wasn´t too bad after all.

Even when reaching your room, which luckily was still empty at that time, you felt the beating inside your chest, the enormous heat in your cheeks and your shivering hands holding onto the note. After re-reading the first and now second note, which very clearly belonged to the same person, you sighed heavily. It was useless, with as little information you were offered, it could be anybody. You let yourself fall onto the bed, eyes on the ceiling. The only safe conclusion was, that you had an admirer. With that thought, a warm bevy of butterflies floated through your stomach, until the smile had reached your face as well.

A week passed and as much as you denied it, you were fairly disappointed to not have received a new note. It felt like a letter forming and yet, there wasn´t a minute where you didn´t think about those words. It was Saturday and with Leanne and Hannah at your side, you found yourself in the seated rows of the Hufflepuff tower on the Quidditch pitch. The game was Hufflepuff against Gryffindor and for the first time this week, your mind was finally focused on something else. The three of you yelled and rooted for your team with the scores level at the time. Then the two teams agreed upon a little break to discuss strategies and while Leanne went off to grab some more popcorn, you and Hannah chit-chatted about your week. “Has it started yet? Did I miss something?” Leanne asked nervously as she sat back down. Hannah shook her head.

“No, they´re just taking their positions again”, she explained and threw a hand of the caramelized popcorn down her throat. You nodded agreeing and as you leaned forward to grab some of the delicious sweets as well, you noticed a white strip of paper in your shoe. Madame Hooch refereed and the game continued. It gave you enough time to grab some popcorn and then the note, which was carefully stuck to the side slide of your shoe. Leaning back and to the side, your friends were too focused anyways, you quickly read the note. Again, your heart beat had risen.

It´s lingering in the air

I´ve noticed it since the early spring

Can you smell it too?

You groaned and funnily enough, so did the rest of the Hufflepuff supporter team, Gryffindor had just caught the golden snitch. At least you didn´t attract attention with your down mood.

Your anonymous writer didn´t give anything away. And by Merlin´s beard, how did you not noticed that the note was stuck in your very own show?

Gloomy, the three of you left the tower and made your way back to the castle, while the Gryffindor team celebrated their success. “Y/N!”

You quickly spun around; Neville ran towards you and your heart dropped a little again. Leanne and Hannah shrugged and left you behind with Neville.

“Congratulations, Neville!”, you exclaimed sounding still a little down. Neville smiled awkwardly and scratched the back of his neck. “Thanks, don´t worry, you´re up against Ravenclaw next weekend, I´m sure you´ll beat them!”

Softly smiling, you nodded. “Yeah, better luck next time, hm?”

He furrowed his brows, a little confused looking. “Are you okay though?”

“Yeah, just a lot on my mind.”

“You´re still coming to the party tonight? C´mon you´re not a bad looser like Slytherin, are you?”

You couldn´t help but let out a chuckle as well. “No, I´m definitely coming.”

Hannah was still pouting when you entered the party only hours later and you nudged her side.

“Stop it, you´ll ruin the ambiance.”

“You´re one to talk, one second you´re happily dancing in the bathroom and in the next all you do is stare out the window!” Now, you punched her shoulder a little harder.

“I have not the slightest idea what you´re talking about!”

“Y/n!” Two, tall and identical looking red-heads approached you. “You need to lighten up a little, how about a drink? Hannah how about you?”

Hannah shook her head quickly and rushed away in the crowd, leaving you behind. She feared that certain things would reoccur and the ending in the bathroom, wasn’t pleasant for her. You shrugged. “Maybe you´re right and I need a drink.”

The Weasley twins grinned and led you off to the side while grabbing three cups. After taking a few sips and catching up, they grinned knowingly.

“So, tell us, which boy has bewitched your mind?”

You almost spit out your drink, how did they know?

“Pardon me?” George grinned innocently.

“Oh, you know, Leanne has been telling us that you receive love letters.” You rolled your eyes; Leanne was too big of a blabbermouth for her own good. Or?

What if they lied and knew who the sender was? Or was it one of them?

You eyed George and Fred suspiciously, but there was no way it was either one of them. They could´ve never stayed so serious and eager to know, without giggling like little girls.

“They´re not love letters, they´re-“, you sighed and paused. “I don´t know what they are.”

Their eyes grew big and they nodded interested. “And do you have a guess who it is?”

You shook your head. “Not the slightest. But you two dare to talk about this, I´ll make sure your mother hears about the list of your latest pranks!”

Quickly, they shook their heads, fear in their eyes. “Nope, but maybe we´ll notice someone and then we´ll tell you!” George added, but then Ron and Harry entered the party. The twins shrugged, patted your back and left you alone again.

Truly, you believed them. Their general interest and curiosity wasn´t new.

The party was good and yet, your tune wasn´t right for the night. Instead of being a killjoy, you decided to leave rather early. As you made your way through the crowd towards the exit, shrugging apologetically at your friends, a hand wrapped around your wrist.

“Are you already leaving?” You looked up to find Neville´s tall figure hovering above you. In your first year, you had been taller than him, but in the third he caught up. He seemed worried, but you offered him a reassuring smile. “Yeah, I´m not really feeling it.”

He nodded understanding and for the first time this evening, your decision wasn´t questioned. “I´ll walk you back.”

The two of you left the room and suddenly the halls went quiet. It was hard to imagine that only a wall ahead, a full party was happening. “I do know the way back though.”

Neville chuckled. “I know, I´m just making sure Filch won´t caught you.”

For a while you two walked in silence, stopping from time to time to listen if anyone was approaching. No one was though. “You seem distracted lately”, Neville spoke up again, watching your reaction. “Is it that obvious?”

He shrugged, but continued nodding. You reached the Hufflepuff Common Room.

“You know you can always talk to me”, Neville explained calmy and you thanked him quietly, he was always at your side when you needed him. With him you never felt awkward or unwanted.

“Yeah, I´m just not sure if I´m ready yet.”

“Don´t worry, I´ll wait.” Neville turned around, leaving you in front of the entrance. You watched as his figure disappeared and just as you began to wonder, if he was…

Cedric Diggory appeared from a dark corner and with quick steps, he pulled you into the common room. “Cedric? What´s going on?”

He seemed out of breath, cheeks a little heated, but that might have been the fire whiskey in his breath. “Filch was following me!” He exclaimed, while getting his breath back.

Cedric was an admirable school mate of yours, two classes above and known to make a girl´s heart swoon. Just know you realized that his hand was still holding onto your arm, quickly he let go.

“Sorry”, he mumbled and the blush crept back on his cheeks. “You shouldn´t be, you probably saved me from Filch.”

He let out a soft laughter. “What were you doing out anyways?”

“I wasn´t in a party mood today and Ne-“, you stopped mid-sentence, not wanting to give anything away. “And I decided to leave early.” He nodded. “Agreed, after messing up the game, I wasn´t feeling it either.”

He smiled again. “At least I could save you from Filch, even though we lost the game”, he paused and you were unsure of what was to come.

“Well, you know what they say; Unlucky at cards, lucky in love.”

For the second time this evening you were left standing and wondering. Could it be Cedric?

You shook your head; Cedric was older than you and you didn´t have any classes together. But could it still be him?

Finally, you could wander off to your bed, but as you brushed off the clothes that smelled like sweat and liquor, you found another note.

My dearest,

I must confess, you´re much dearer and essential to me than you know of.

Yet, I can´t bear the thought of showing my face.

You almost let out a scream as you read it. But then, as you recalled the evening, you began to question everything again. First, you had thought, it must have been Cedric. He was the last one to be close enough to secretly give you the note. But then again Neville, or even the twins. Actually, the room of Gryffindors was crowded and you had just noticed the letter. As a sad conclusion; you still didn´t have the slightest idea.

Just before your eyes finally closed, a last breakthrough formed in your mind. On Monday morning in potions class, you would put a note in your book. If the secret writer were to use the same spot again, he would surely find it.

Who are you?

Monday came and Monday left, Snape had announced a group project, which would be included in your final grade. Consequently, the note escaped your mind and you focused on the new project, which would be hard enough. But then on Wednesday, where you and your group of schoolmates continued working on the project, you opened the potions book again. The note was gone. You grinned to yourself; the plan had worked. On Thursday, you found yourself outside. The weather was just lovely and Spencer enjoyed the fresh air on his tutoring lessons as well. However, the note you found that day, came with your very own owl. The soft gray creature curred as you took the letter and patted her head.

As the flowers begin to blossom and the sweet smell of the cherry trees lingers in the air,

The roses in the green houses are growing and white lily petals are showing,

They won´t be there for long and yet they´re longing

To be like you; the most beautiful flower to be blooming.

You do know me, can´t you guess?

Spencer lurked over your shoulder, but you quickly hid away the letter and you gaze wandered over the trees.

“Do you not know who it´s from?” Spencer finally asked very carefully and you shrugged mindlessly. “But it´s your owl, isn´t it?” You nodded again.

“And how would that person send a letter with your owl?”

The rationale rolled over you and hit you like a wave. “Spencer, I have to go, just give me your homework tomorrow when you´re finished!” You jumped on your legs and immediately started running towards the Owlery. You felt as finally having a chance in finding out who he was and your heart was pounding inside your chest as you reached the small tower. The stone steps were old and ivy lingered in the crevices. The inside of the Owlery was always cold, which was quite pleasant in the hot burning summer days. Wind howled on the inside, but besides your feathered friends, it was empty. Despondent, you left.

You felt like such a fool, you didn´t know who it was and having to face yet another failure, you truly felt stupid. Glumly, you walked back but then you heard a crash coming from the greenhouses. You saw the silhouette of a person working inside and began to wonder.

As the flowers begin to blossom and the sweet smell of the cherry trees lingers in the air,

The roses in the green houses are growing and white lily petals are showing,

You repeated the words in your mind; who would write such sweet and graceful words in the metaphor of the absolute purest things; flowers. Who loved plants so much, they hid behind the green leaves in order to not be seen? Finally, you smiled again.

“Neville?”

He looked up from the pot, that had slipped out of his hands only seconds before.

“Y/n.”

You both starred at each other for several minutes, not knowing how to begin. It was Neville, he had been all along. Who else shared the potion class with you and who knew about your typical spots when tutoring Spencer? Who didn´t play in any Quidditch and therefore had enough time to sneak beneath the sitting benches?

“I think I need to confess something”, Neville finally spoke up and a deep blush crept upon his cheeks.

“I think you already did, in the most beautiful words.” A small smile played on his lips and you stepped closer. “I´m sorry, it took some time to figure it out.”

Neville laughed softly and scratched his neck. “I almost regretted sending them, good thing you found me before I´d had a chance to stop.”

You joined in with laughter. “No matter, I wouldn´t have stopped looking for you.”

Carefully, he grabbed your waist to pull you closer and you felt the tips of your noses touching. “You have no idea, how long I waited for this”, he whispered and you felt his warm breath on your skin. “Well, what are you waiting for then?”

Neville leaned down, pressing his lips softly onto yours and you gave into his welcoming touch. When you parted again, he simply starred at you.

“You´re truly the most beautiful flower I´ve ever seen.”

#neville longbottom imagine #neville longbottom oneshot #neville longbottom x reader #matthew lewis #harry potter imagine #mariamermaidimagine

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futurebicon · 4 years

Note

You don’t have to write all three of these but I have an idea. What about O’Knutzy’s kid (I can’t remember his name) doing things with his three dads. Like cooking with Leo, reading with Finn, and watching a movie with Logan during a storm (I feel like both of them being scared of storms would be cute)? I don’t know that just popped into my head!

I also got an ask for 14. “Darling I love you and all, but please step out of the kitchen.”

I was just imagining the mess of an accent Caspin has. Growing up with New York, French Canadian, and southern. That has to be an extremely attractive accent I’m jealous of Fizzy

“Good. Now the flour” Leo stood beside his son, Caspin an inch taller than the blonde. “And stir as you add slowly.”

Caspin did as Leo instructed, slowly adding the flour to the soft pretzels they decided to try and make from scratch.

“I wanna help.” Logan walked in.

“You can help by eating it later but you are not allowed to help cook.” Leo told his husband.

“Why not babe? I’m not that bad of a chef.”

“Papa I’ve seen you catch dry noodles on fire.” Caspin smiled. “Is this stirred enough Pa?”

Leo leaned over to look in the metal bowl. “Yeah that’s looking good. You can add the yeast mix now.”

“You underestimate me.” Logan shook his head. “Watch.” He moved the kitchen towel off the counter to make room for whatever he was going to do.

“Lo, NO.” Leo shouted, watching his husband throw the towel down on the hot stove, the end catching on fire.

Caspin grabbed the cup of water they had measured out and threw it on the towel as Leo moved it off the stove.

“Oops.” Logan cringed.

“Darling I love you and all, but please step out of the kitchen.” Leo sighed.

“Yeah that’s probably a good idea.” He nodded, peaking Leo’s lips and leaving the room.

Caspin and Leo looked at each other, Leo shaking his head as both of them laughed lightly.

+++

“What’s that?” Finn nodded at Caspin who was curled up in a ball on the love seat, his mind absorbed in the book he was gripping tightly.

“Pardon?” He looked up, too lost in the book to hear his Dad.

“What book is that?”

“Oh. It’s called Fahrenheit 451. It’s about-“

“A future America where books are forbidden and firemen burn any books found. Guy Montag, a firefighter, realizes that books are needed and fights against the rules.” Finn continued his sentence.

“Fahrenheit 451 is the temperature at which books burn” they finished the summary with smiles.

“I’m gonna take a wild guess and say you’ve read it.”

“I have an English major.” Finn shrugged and sat down on the couch, opening his own book.

He glanced up at his son who was fidgeting with the pages, looking conflicted.

“Want me to read it with you?” Finn asked.

Caspin smiled wide and nodded.

“Come here” Finn shared his smile and sat up.

Caspin walked over and handed him the book open to the page he was reading. He sat beside him on the wide couch even though it barley fit them both. He curled against his dad like he used to when he was little.

Finn kissed the top of his sons head. Transported back to a 5 year old Caspin, just learning how to read, curled up against him at bedtime. Pointing at different words.

“What’s dat?”

“Trophy. Like the cup.” Finn explained.

“Shhhhhh.” Caspin put his little hand over dads mouth. He took it away and knocked on his wooden bedpost.

“We taught him well” Logan smiled, the three parents knocking on the wood.

Finn snapped back to the present and watched the letters form words. “Where’d you leave off?”

“There” the teen pointed at the paragraph.

“‘Doors slammed and the house was empty. Montag stood alone in the winter weather with the parlor walls the color of dirty snow...’”

+++

“Papa” Caspin walked out of his room.

“Storm wake you?” Logan looked over at him.

Caspin nodded and walked over to the couch, curling up beside his Papa. “What are we watching?”

“Captain America The Winter Soldier”

“Ah, Harry and Ginnys bi panic movie. Scream about Natasha or scream about Bucky and Steve.” Caspin nodded seriously.

Logan threw his head back and laughed. “That’s pretty accurate.”

They both jumped as thunder clapped and lightning illuminated the room.

The father and son curled around each other tightly, focusing on the movie as the storm raged on.

Sorry the endings kind of rushed

@lumosinlove

#lumosinlove #sweater weather #sweater weather lumosinlove #oknutzy #caspin #send prompts #next gen #next gen kids

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star-cant-think · 2 years

Text

did i have hw to do while working on this? yes. did i care? no lmao

anyway this is queued along with some other stuff since it hit 4/13 here. it’ll be out while i’m in class. more will be uploaded later. this is a bit old and messy so pardon that.

13th anniversary of homestuck yet i literally just got into it. anyway, i like this (figuratively) little comic. sure, it can be a bit of a mess sometimes, but i’ve always gotten a laugh out of it, and the characters are probably my most favorite characters out of a vast bunch lol.

sappy paragraph aside: happy birthday to this comic (who finally gets a name) + john and jane and happy 4/13.

#my art #homestuck #april 13 #413 #4/13 #john egbert #rose lalonde #dave strider #jade harley #casey the salamander #wow im actually posting something #and its art related #i still haven’t finished reading homestuck #but ive read enough of the fandom page to know things #so there's that #also don’t forget about neil #today he’s banging out some tunes #queued #2022 art

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justalittlebluetiefling · 4 years

Note

After tonight, how do you think Jester's feeling? Honestly, I wasn't so sure before, but after their conversation, I'm again very certain Fjord is the one she has feelings for

All right, anon. This is a fun question for me, because we talk about Fjord’s feelings a lot, but not Jester’s. I’m going to say a few things that I never thought I’d say in this ask. For example: Fjord’s feelings have been much more obvious in the last 60 episodes than Jester’s have been. If you had told me I would say that 100 episodes ago, I would have laughed so hard. But here we are.

TLDR? Jester’s in love with Fjord and has been for a while. I’ve been going off about this occasionally since her second playlist was released. But that is what really convinced me that she had moved from ‘crush’ into ‘love’. And episode 117 helped me be even more confident in saying that.

I also wanted to put some episode 117 receipts in here, but tags in Tumblr are tricky sometimes, so I just made a companion gifset instead. (If this link messes with the tags, I’ll take it out and put it in a reblog.)

Anyway. Let’s get a cut in here so I can get carried away with the why. 2436 words of carried away.

So, like I mentioned above, Fjord’s feelings have been much more obvious than Jester’s lately. For a while, I guess. Pardon me while I just quote Laura from Talks for second. And that’s mostly because Jester backed off when she thought her advances were unappreciated. It was all part of Jester realizing that smut novels aren’t what real relationships are like. A very integral part of her development and how she’s more than her crush(es).

The funny thing about all this... I think about this sometimes... is how Fjord didn’t actually not appreciate it. He’s just got low wisdom and didn’t realize that it meant that she like-likes him. He thought they were just goofing off. Because. Sorry, I’m briefly hopping into Fjord meta and then I’ll hop right back, I promise. But yeah. He thought they were just goofing off and I’m realizing as I type this paragraph that it never occurred to him, because “You know when someone makes you feel a way that you don't think you have any right to feel or you never thought that you might?”. Yeah. So, it wasn’t just his low wisdom. It just didn’t occur to him, because he didn’t think that he deserved to feel that way about anyone or have anyone feel that way about him. Okay. Hopping back now.

The other hilarious thing about this is that things between them weren’t awkward until she backed off and stopped overtly flirting. Which also correlates with the end of the pirate arc and how Beau, during that arc, pointed out to Fjord that Jester was jealous of Avantika.

But yeah. Jester backed off, which really threw their relationship into a whole new dynamic. I have a lot more complicated and layered feelings on the pirate arc that require a rewatch for me to properly articulate, but we know that Jester was scared during this time. She was a little scared that she didn’t really know Fjord (Re: Somebody Else being on her first playlist). But that was only temporary. That whole time made Jester start to question her feelings for Fjord. Which in turn made most of the fandom start to question them as well. But I do think that she eventually landed on “my friendship with him is more important to me than a potential relationship and if I keep acting like this, I’m going to lose him”. This is partially her realizing that life isn’t a romance novel, but I think it is also a direct result of her realizing how uncomfortable he was with the idea of being used as bait to distract Avantika. He did it, but he was not comfortable the whole time they talked about it.

But also, Fjord was her first real friend outside of Artagan. He trusted her right away with things he didn’t tell anyone else in their group for months. She knew he was hiding his accent. She knew what happened on the Tide’s Breath. He told her before he told anyone else about how he lost his powers. They promised to protect each other and help each other on their way to their individual goals and they’re still holding up that promise every day.

ANYWAY I’M GETTING DISTRACTED I’M SORRY.

Okay, where are her feelings now. Now. She’s in love with him. When she backed off from the flirting and started focusing on just being there as a friend, it deepened their relationship. I mean, to be fair, it was already pretty deep. I promise I’m not getting off track this time, but he really did tell her things he told no one else. Sometimes it takes him longer to get around to it, because of the group, but he always ends up telling Jester everything. And that opens the door for Jester to be open with him, too, in a way that she isn’t with anyone else.

I mean, okay. Gosh. How do I even word this?

Jester doesn’t actively seek anyone out to talk about her feelings. There are two times I can think of off the top of my head that she’s broached the subject first. One: when she was looking for Beau and ended up talking to Veth about how she felt about the kiss that wasn’t a kiss. And Two: the Jellyfish talk, when she asked Fjord if he ever gets sad. But Jester keeps everything buried pretty deeply. So, the fact that Fjord is constantly going out of his way to ask her if she’s okay and the fact that he pulled her aside to tell her that if she ever needs to talk, she can talk to him. That’s a huge deal. And I think she’s still scared to take him up on it, because on top of all these things is that layer of awkwardness. Fjord and Jester are just awkward with each other right now. And their feelings for each other are what makes it awkward.

If the awkwardness was one-sided and only coming from Fjord, I’d say that her feelings had gone away. But it’s not. It’s always two-sided. There’s so much tension in all of their conversations, because while they talk about everything else, there’s one thing they haven’t talked about. Or... I guess it’s a couple things at this point. But they’ve never talked about the kiss that wasn’t a kiss. That’s what I mean specifically at this point. It’s just never been brought up. Which is so weird, because the other times (I think it’s two? Maybe it’s one. I’m doubting myself.) that Fjord’s saved Jester’s life with a potion, she brought it up. She made a production about it. But the kiss was different, because she didn’t know if it was a real kiss. I think she’s come around to it not being a real kiss, but it’s got to still bug her.

But that’s planted this seed of awkwardness in all their solo interactions that hasn’t gone away. Jester’s been pushing her feelings for Fjord aside. Or trying to. But he keeps doing things that make her have hope again and it’s getting to a point that she can’t ignore that feeling. Like... He wanted her to be the one to go with him into the wreckage of the Tide’s Breath. The whole day after the blue dragon encounter, he was hovering. He wanted her to have a potion so that she could be safe and he said that he wasn’t being awkward he was disarming her. He dove off the side of a tree when she fell to save her. He tells her how much her help has meant to him in Kravaraad. He makes sure they go visit her dad. He runs after her to go rescue her mama and then he tells her that he’ll wear a stupid hat if she wants him to and that she looks lovely while implying that he’d like to look at her in that dress all the time. And then he asks her if she’d like to get dinner with him instead of go look for their friends. AND THEN he tells her that he likes it when she’s feeling his stomach looking for the orb. He was constantly checking in with her during Travlercon to make sure she was safe and comfortable. He launched himself into the air over an active volcano and begged her to let go and stay with them. AND TO MAKE MATTERS MORE CONFUSING FOR HER. He hugged her twice and then he willingly danced with her even though he didn’t know how AND THEN he gave her this tiny unicorn statue, because he knows how much she loves things like that. And now he’s given her the necklace that was meant to protect him, because he’s more concerned about her safety than his own. He told her that he’s having a hard time focusing on his future, because his past keeps getting in the way and he wants to deal with that before........ AND THEN HE SAYS he’s going to be thinking about how she helped him all night.

LIKE.

I got a little carried away again, sorry.

Here’s the deal.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. There has been nothing in canon to make me think that Jester’s feelings have gone away. Everything I can see implies that they’ve deepened. But she’s scared. She’s never really been in love before. It is absolutely terrifying (or it is for me) to admit when you’re in love. Especially when you don’t know if your feelings are reciprocated. Or if you think they’re unwanted. And she thought hers were unwanted. But she’s still been doing little things this whole time. She’s still shown signs of jealousy. She still thirsts over him, just not as openly as she did before. She gets super shy whenever they have one-on-ones and that makes her get awkward in the cutest way. Jester started to be careful with how she was around Fjord, but he’s been making it pretty clear that he doesn’t want her to be careful with him and I think she’s starting to realize that. It’s giving her hope that maybe her feelings are wanted.

Also, the fact that there’s no in-between for these two? They’re either incredibly emotional when they talk to each other or incredibly awkward or BOTH. They are radiating “in love with your best friend” energy. The difference is that Fjord isn’t afraid of ruining the friendship and Jester is. Or... well... yeah. Actually, that’s what I mean. I think Jester’s coming around to not being afraid. She’s got hope again that they might be something more. And I think that hope is starting to be fun for her again instead of scary.

OKAY I’m almost done. I want to very briefly talk about that gifset that I made, because I made receipts for a reason, damn it. Let’s talk ONLY about the conversation in 117.

Gif 1: This one is right after this exchange. Jester: I mean... it's worth a try. He's met all of us, so he could potentially scry on anyone, I guess, now. But maybe it'll keep me from being seen if I scry on him. I don't know how it all works. // Fjord: I guess we'd find out the next time we did it. // Jester: Yeah. Like, she looks down at the necklace and just smiles, because Fjord has literally just told her that his safety doesn’t matter as much as hers. Fjord went out of his way to do this thing for her and she just looks so touched.

Gifs 2 and 3: These are both just Jester laughing over Fjord talking about her face when she’s scrying. They’re goofing off and being silly. And gif 3 in particular is just... again. She’s having fun! With Fjord! And she likes that.

Gif 4: Jester just asked Fjord “how are you?” and he started up with that big, goofy grin. And she can’t even get through calling her question stupid without smiling. Like, she’s reacting to his smile. And it’s kind of funny, because I think she doesn’t understand why he’s smiling so much in that moment, but she still can’t help but smile back.

Gif 5: I feel like I need to close all of that before.... That’s such an interesting reaction and SO TELLING. Like, that small smile and then she kind of takes a breath and then she still can’t not smile over it. SHE KNOWS. She really hopes that it means what she wants it to mean. And she wants it to mean something.

Gif 6: She’s once again reacting to a Fjord smile. You can see the way the corners of her mouth keep trying to smile. Because Fjord is just touched and telling her that yeah, she should send a message to Kotho. And then it’s the things she’s doing with her hand there, too. She’s all nervous energy and can’t really hold still. There’s that hope again.

Gif 7: She’s SO HAPPY because she’s helping him. SO HAPPY. And again with the hands! So much nervous energy.

Gif 8: It's just a spell! It's easy to do. Again with the hands!!! I mean, okay. Speculation and projection. I’m aware. This is just something I do and I see it in Jester a lot. Where, she’s got to do something with her hands so they don’t do what she really wants them to. I mean, SERIOUSLY. And the way she smiles at him at the end of it. There’s a lot for her to process about this exchange and I think it’s starting to hit her. How much this means. What this might mean. And she’s happy. She’s excited.

Gif 9: I will think about that all night. Still the nervous energy. I won’t repeat that paragraph. But like. Fuck. Fjord told her that he was going to think about that all night. I kind of want to yell right now. In a good way. My heart just hurts in a good way over this moment. I can’t even speculate on her emotions here because that’s like... huge. There was so much tension here. Jester hasn’t had anyone say anything like this to her before. She doesn’t know how to react. And Fjord is also holding himself back. Uh, this is Fjord HOLDING HIMSELF BACK. What the fuck. I mean. Okay I have to move on. I have nothing productive to say here.

Gif 10: I guess I was wrong. This isn’t only about the conversation, but also about the moment later. Where he thinks she’s going to scry when she’s going to send and she realizes that he was going to do what she asked him to before. She is just so pleased that he intended to follow through. I choose to believe this is 100% what Jester’s face actually did in the moment. And I love this because it’s only awkward on Fjord’s end this time. Jester is just happy.

I’ve gotta end this thing, guys. Why are you even still listening to me ramble???

I guess what I ultimately want this whole answer to be: Jester’s in love with Fjord. Fjord makes her so happy. And she is starting to let herself hope that he’s in love with her, too. She can see the possibility of a future with him again and finally letting herself believe that it might happen. So, yeah. That’s where I think Jester’s feelings are.

Hope you enjoyed my mini breakdown over Jester and how much Fjord’s support has meant to her!

#fjorester #jester lavorre #critical role #the mighty nein #cr spoilers #dudes i'm sorry #this got so long #i just couldn't stop once i got started #and i kept getting distracted #anonymous #erin answers things

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kiisaes · 4 years

Note

What do you mean by langa having a crush on reki? Did he say that? (I hope so lol)

SPOILERS FOR SK8 EPISODE 8!!!

u have been warned!!!

episode 8 of sk8 released today and in it, langa asks his mom for help because reki is avoiding him. langa doesn’t namedrop reki and basically says that he messed up, hurt someone, and feels like it’s all his fault, which leads to this interaction:

(pardon the grainy ass quality)

right away we see langa admitting that he “likes” someone, that someone in his head being reki. he’s also blushing here, but it’s hard to see with the shitty ass quality.

he thinks that “honestly relaying his emotions” is too embarrassing, which could be interpreted as him being too embarrassed to confess to reki.

YEAH, SO...

recap: langa asks his mom for help on something, his mom takes it as “oh my son is having trouble with a girl that he likes”, so she provides love advice, as shown by how she says “...if you really care about her!”. because langa never tells her that he’s actually talking about a boy until afterwards, she doesn’t abstain in giving him this love advice - therefore, it honestly couldn’t be implied any other way.

anyway, langa never explicitly says that he has a crush on reki, but it’s pretty decently implied. after this scene, langa tries finding reki at his home, which might mean that he wants to “honestly relay his emotions”. and when reki isn’t there, langa assumes that he’s at S, which he’s happy about; when he arrives at S, he’s specifically looking for reki.

of course, this could all be entirely platonic, but if it is, it was very baity. langa basically got a “alright here’s the deal, here’s how you’re gonna get the girl” conversation with his mom about reki. if you replaced either langa or reki with a girl... i’m just sayin

---

EDIT: i removed the japanese translation paragraph because there seems to be disagreement about what langa's mom says and its interpretations, so just to be safe i don't want to spread misinformation about a whole language LOL - i don't want to act like i know because i definitely do not, i am the most beginner of beginners on the japanese language

#sk8 the infinity #sk8 #sk8 spoilers #asks for becki

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creamypudding · 3 years

Text

I'm re-reading and editing chapters I haven't touched in months, which lets me see them from a fresh perspective. It however sucks when this fresh perspective makes me go 'oh no. This is horrible. This makes no sense! What is this? What was I even on about?'

And I can't tell if the chapter's actually horrible or if I was just preoccupied while I was reading it.

While in the process of writing I'm 'in the zone'. I have all the character motivations in my head. They speak from a place of coherent reason, but then when that memory fades and I come back with a fresh face and no idea what I even wrote, it suddenly makes no sense anymore.

What were the character motives? Why did they say this or do that?

I hope that on a second read-through it's gonna make more sense and feel better. But in my heart I already know what the weak links are. And truthfully, I knew they were weak and tenuous at the time of writing but I somehow deluded myself into thinking it was alright. I gave myself over to Mediocrates and said 'that's good enough' but now coming back I know that 'no, this is nowhere near good enough'.

Mind you... I'm still hoping that on a second read-through the awfulness will go back to feeling 'good enough' because my tank is empty and I cannot for the life of me come up with a way to fix this mess.

And maybe I'm being hard on myself. This chapter in question is heavy on the transitional scenes. This chapter, in fact, had been pulled out of a larger chapter and made into its own chapter because otherwise the word count would have been utterly stupid and killed my readership.

So maybe that is also the issue here in some ways. Maybe that's why there is so much transition in this chapters because it was building to the second half - which is also 'next chapter's since I split it in two.

And writing large passages describing the passing of time but still keeping it engaging and peppered with 'moments' is not my strong suit. My strength lies in exploring pivotal moments in depth. My stories are key moments, with a bit of string in between to tie stuff together. But this chapter feels like more string than 'moments'. And I tried to detangle the string and attach smaller moments while I worked up to the 'big moments' of the chapter, but now I feel like the little moments are A) too small B) too scattered C) detract from the big moments and D) do not service, nor build up to the big moments properly.

I feel like there is too much going on. And I say this as someone who writes single scenes that can span for just about 20k - so like, I'm used to 'lots going on'. So it shouldn't faze me, right? Maybe I'm just done hard by all the transition scenes?

Trying to explain character actions and making their reasoning stand out in one of two sentences when I'm used to devoting paragraphs upon paragraphs to teasing out the emotional heart of a point, a theme, an event, is hard to (pardon pun) transition out of.

I want to be proud of every chapter I pu out. I want to know I did my absolute best. I don't know if I can feel proud of this drivel. I don't know if I can let something so mediocre see the light of day. I don't know how I'm supposed to rewrite this. The tank is empty. So empty in fact that I'm putting off finishing the last chapter by revisiting previous chapters.

I'm disappointed I found this chapter in such a mess.

I can't believe it's so badly written. I hope reading it again on a different day will make it seem better. I fear that it won't. A part of me wants to just embrace Mediocrates. My soul knows I can't.

Urgh.

#writing woes #editing hell

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a-shakespearean-in-paris · 3 years

Text

First Lines

Tagged by @laelior, thank you! (I feel like someone else also tagged me a while ago but I have forgotten, I’m sorry!)r

Rules: List the first lines of your last 5-20 stories See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line.

I’m going to go with the first line of each story rather than the first line of my latest update.

1. In Waking Dreams

Images, flashes. They were all small bits of memories, weaving themselves together.

2. Ropes and Blindfolds

There’s something to the idea of surrender, Lydia says. She’s locked to a role as Inquisitor and sometimes she just wants to shed herself away to basest and most primal parts of Lydia and only feel

3.Reflections in the Mirror

The relationship Lydia had with her body always changed.

4.Stains of Red

She counted time as the intervals between his kisses.

5. Her Infinite Variety

Brienne of Tarth was not an actress, though she often thought of herself as one when she was younger. “We all have roles,” her mother used to say, “you must make your stage wherever you are.”

6.. The Tulsa Queen

Laurel walked out on her mother and her protests about needing to stay till the bitter end as “Don’t Worry Baby” played.

7. Memoirs of a Long, Long Time

Last night, he dreamt of the Blight again, when her eyes weren’t yet home.

8. The Inquisitor’s Throne

Dainty, delicate Inquisitor Lydia Trevelyan they call her. She can certainly play the part, look good in rich silks and swish her hand elegantly when she has to. It’s comes easy to charm a few nobles with carefully placed words, though she only does it if she must. Few deserve her sweet words, and one has them all.

9. Reading Lessons

He wants something else to read. There’s only so much Brother Genitivi one can take before the diatribes gets rather dull. She can’t blame him and was about to suggest an adventure volume or something else equally inconspicuous, perhaps Hard in Hightown. However, he strolls to the bookshelves of his own accord and finds it. That.

10. Command Me

She’s remised of her Commander.

11. Furs and Firelight

Her lover inhabited his body as a lion, cautious yet demanding, full of fire and flood similar to her own fire. He seemed to almost purr at her lingering lips and tongue against his neck and pulse after she came to him in his office in the evening, her fingers grasping and clinging to his white tunic. He was out of his armor when she came to him, ready for her to have him as nothing more or less than Cullen, not the Commander.

10. Sweet Reunion

Often they reunited in the stables. Though always sweaty and disheveled from riding he always cared not, kissing her in hello and sometimes lifting her feet from the ground in front of their audience of horses and companions who enjoyed the sight of a sweet reunion between two joyful, miscreant lovers. Yet their reunion this time, after three months parted, happened in her room. Better to fall apart in her room and in his arms where no one else could see. Better to fall apart for only Cullen, not even the Commander.

11. Restless Nights

One evening in Griffon Wing Keep, Rylen stumbled upon the sight of two lasses, poured over a book.

12. Anyway You Want It

Three roommates currently seeking a fourth. Must be okay with large mabari and large messes, not necessarily made by the mabari. None of us cook, hope you’re all right with lots of takeout. (Unless you are willing to cook for us, in that case, please, please contact.) Sorry, you have to share a bathroom, but you get your own room. It’s pretty big. We’re nice, and not “nice guy” nice if that was your impression. If interested, text or call Rylen or Barris.

13. Enchanter Come to Me

He’s here.

14. The Sweetest Sorrow

Charlotte Vale’s hands were dainty and soft. A lady’s hands, or “your father has money hands,” as her brother Alexander said in jest once or twice. Yet the biggest sin of Charlotte Vale, and then later Balfour’s hands were that they betrayed her dull and uneventful life. Needlework and embroidery gave her only pricked fingers, and once she may have fancied them battle scars and wounds. Once, she thought a lot of things. But even with the little pinpricks here and there, they were still soft, privileged hands that had not lived.

15. Only Lovers

She wakes before him. Despite their deeds last night, it seems too intimate to chance a peek at his sleeping form. She’s always taken chances. Why should this one be different? So she takes the chance.

16. Love Song on Sapphire Isle

At sundown the Kingslayer stands at Winterfell, there to fight for the living. Most don’t have time to care about the man with a golden hand, though some faces scorn. Fewer find him noble and honorable, though not even they can suspect that the simple truth of the matter is that the Kingslayer's arrival to Winterfell falls to a single woman that said fuck loyalty.

17. like lovers do

A week before the ship will set sail to Teer Fradee, Kurt watches as Green Blood departs the ballroom, slipping between the open doorway that lets in the cool night air

18. Our Immortal Longings

She didn’t know how she would grow to need him so, the night they first met. That night they met he had yet allowed himself to be fully himself and what he wanted to be. It was just as she didn’t yet know, that she was just as lost as he, merely floating through life, gliding and only being. She didn't know it then,while he, meanwhile, didn’t yet know how to be anything else other than what he was made to be. But the night they met, he met a woman, and she met a man.

19. A Knight to Remember

He’s sure that one look at him would allow no one to toy with or entertain the notion, but it doesn’t make the fact false. He’s not ashamed of it. At any rate, why should the fact that the Kingslayer has in the past, dabbled in reading novels of a more romantic sort be such a shame? It's not.

pardon I got lazy with linking

Which one do I like the best? In general I prefer more blunt, one sentence openings as a way to ease into the reading before following with a second paragraph but I’m actual partial to The Sweetest Sorrow’s opening line/paragraph. I wish I had a grander explanation other than I like hands--hands are a thing in this story...as they are with many of mine. because hands. :D

tagging @galadrieljones @thevikingwoman @queen-kass-the-writer @laraslandlockedblues @kunstpause @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold @dismalzelenka

#I also like her infinite variety's #tagged #he's here #also #blunt to the point #great

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