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marshmallow-phd · 6 years

Text

The Experiments

Genre: Sci-Fi, Thriller, Experiment AU

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Exo (????)

Summary: You were a med school graduate who just wanted to help research cures for the world. Instead, what you got was a dream job at EXO Applied Sciences. That is, until you discover the secrets of Level Sixty-Six and the nine inhabitants that are stored down there….

Warning: None

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11 I 12 I 13 I 14 I 15 I 16 I 17 I 18 I 19 I 20 I 21 I 22 I 23 I Final

You couldn’t stay cooped up in your apartment anymore. Night had fallen, but it wasn’t quite a reasonable time yet to go to bed. So, you thought maybe a run might help exhaust you and turn off your thoughts. Oh, how wrong you were.

The problem with running was that it didn’t really take your mind off of anything; in reality, it gave you ample time to think, to see faces, to reread the reports that were etched into your head. It was all too much, coming to a climax in your head before forcing you to a complete stop right there on the sidewalk. Bent over and trying to catch your breath, you were nearly to the point of tears, aggravated that you were utterly powerless to change those boys’ fate.

As your breathing slowed down, it was just you and the quiet left behind. Until faint footsteps broke it. Glancing over your shoulder, you saw someone dressed in a black jacket, hood pulled up and covering up their face, walking towards you. You tried to act natural as you straightened up and walked on, keeping your ears open.

The pattern of the footsteps grew faster. Risking another look, you saw that the stranger was speeding up. Not hesitating, you broke into a run, pushing yourself faster, trying to get back to the safety of your apartment. But your legs just weren’t quick enough.

A pair of arms wrapped themselves around you, trapping your own underneath them and bringing the two of you to a halt. You struggled against your attacker’s hold, but you were lifted off the ground and carried to the dark alley nearby.

“Let me go or I’ll scream,” you growled. It was your only weapon. You’d never learned self-defense and you weren’t exactly in the greatest shape.

“Calm down, (y/n), it’s me.”

Marcus?

He dropped you immediately as you stopped fighting and you slowly turned to face him, dumbstruck. Then you hit him in the shoulder.

“What the hell was that?” you hissed.

He barely flinched. “I’m sorry. I went by your apartment, but you weren’t there. When I happened to come by you, I didn’t realize it was you until you started walking away.”

“So why not just call out my name?” You blinked. “Wait, how did you know where I lived?”

Marcus ran a hand through his hair, effectively removing the hood. “Well, that’s actually what I’m needing to talk to you about. You see, (y/n), you’re the only one I can trust. The only one I think who will help.”

At the momentary breeze, you pulled your jacket in closer to you. “Help with what?”

“I’ll start at the beginning.” Marcus looked you in the eye, his demeanor more serious than you’ve ever seen it before. “My name isn’t really Marcus Rand. It’s Marcus Burns and I work for a private sector of the government.”

It couldn’t be helped. You snorted. “Ha, okay. Have you been drinking, Marcus?” You sniffed, but there was no alcohol in the air.

Marcus didn’t laugh. “I’m serious, (y/n). I was put undercover three years ago, working my way to get clearance in level sixty-sixty.”

You wanted to roll your eyes at the ridiculousness of it all. “Why would the government need an undercover agent in the part of the building that’s funded by grants they gave EXO?”

“Because they never did give EXO grants for those experiments.”

Your breath hitched in your throat. Why would the company lie about something like that? Why would it matter exactly where the money came from?

“EXO is completely privately funded,” Marcus continued. “We’re trying to discover just by who because from we’ve found, EXO is not be the only company running these kinds of experiments. They’re just the most successful. We’re trying to shut it all down before the public finds out.”

“Then why doesn’t the government just storm in and close down the experiments,” you argued. “Why bother sending in an undercover agent? For years and wasting time.” Admittedly, part of you was growing angry knowing that – if what Marcus was saying was true – he stood by for years and watched the boys get tortured and tested. Granted, you weren’t doing much better.

Marcus growled. “Because the directors have bought off most of the politicians who might approve or believe any evidence presented to them. We have no proof of the illegality in what they’re doing. I can’t even prove that the volunteer forms weren’t forged.”

You perked up at that little bit of news. “They wouldn’t be legal anyway. They were all teenagers when they woke up in EXO. They told me themselves.”

Marcus didn’t join in on your enthusiasm. “There’s parental signatures on the papers. Trust me, (y/n), we’ve tried everything. There is no trace of them in any system. As far as the world is concerned, they don’t even exist. The names from the parents are probably fake, but we can’t track anyone down to verify that or not. All records of them and their families have been erased. That’s why we have to get them out of there.”

“Wait, what?” You took a step back, unsure how to process his latest statement.

“My mission has been upgraded. I no longer will just stand by and take in information anymore.” Lowering his voice, he took a step towards you. “(y/n), this is why I’m telling you all of this. I know you’re sympathetic towards them and want to help them. I need clearance that you have access to. We can get them out of there, make the testing stop, give them a chance at a real life. What do you say?”

What do you say? You wanted to say yes. You wanted to see all nine of them smile at the sun. You wanted them to no longer be afraid to close their eyes or think that every person who came near them was going to stick them needles or carry them off to a lab to be tested on endlessly. You wanted them free. But that freedom came at a cost.

Over a decade had passed since they were first introduced to the program. Could they survive out here? Could they ever have normal lives again?

And then there was you. What about what happened to you? You’d already made the mistake of trying to help once before in your life.

“No,” you concluded. “No. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

Marcus’ jaw dropped, not expecting you answer in the slightest. “(y/n)–”

“No!” you said more harshly. “I can’t just help you with a jail break. I will lose my job and possibly go to jail. Can you guarantee that I won’t spend a single night in jail if caught?” He didn’t answer. “Thought so. And not to mention what do we do with them once we get them out? Huh? Have you thought that far?”

“We have contingencies set in place,” Marcus insisted. “I have gone over this plan and every possible scenario. I know we can do it. After we get them away from EXO, they’ll be taken to a safe house and from there we have a facility to help them transition back into society. We’ll give them all new identities. Just trust me on this.”

You scoffed. “So, from one cage to another for who knows how long.” It was hard, but you just couldn’t agree to it. You had to find another way. “No, Marcus. I’ve made my decision.”

Taking a step back, Marcus sneered at you. “I thought you wanted to help them.”

“I will,” you snapped back. “But in a way that’s not going to get us all killed.”

Ending the conversation, you walked away and back to your apartment, contemplating if this really was the right way to go.

The orderly sat there awkwardly in silence, not making any attempt to speak to you. He didn’t look at you, instead keeping his gaze down at the control panel. You stood just to his left. Arms cross and eyebrows knitted together, you gazed through the one-way mirror, watching Jongin as he shifted around on the bed.

It was a struggle not to imagine how he could look in the outside world. Girls would flock to him, that’s a fact. But was he dangerous? Not to you, but there was that underlining possibility of him losing control and hurting someone else.

The orderly began to drum his fingers against the fiberglass of the panel. Ones in his position are used to being alone most of the day, only speaking briefly with the doctors and guards that passed through a few times a day. It wasn’t the most exciting job, but it paid decently, from what you heard.

Readying yourself, you nodded to the orderly who looked relieved as he opened the door for you.

Jongin shuffled over to the corner without even looking back at you.

“It’s just me,” you informed him gently. He flipped back over, those soft eyes twinkling just a bit when they met yours. Even the corners of his lips tugged up just a bit.

“How are you today, Jongin?” you asked quietly.

He sat up even straighter. “You know my name?”

“Yes,” you smiled, sitting down in the chair. “But you didn’t answer my question.”

The invisible smile faded quickly. “I can’t sleep.”

“Are you afraid to or just not able to shut your mind off?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t get comfortable. I can’t stop thinking. I thought I heard yelling coming from next door, but I couldn’t tell who it was.”

Jongdae. What did they do to him?

You moved the chair to the point where your knees were up against the mattress. It was completely unprofessional, but you ignored that stupid little voice and took Jongin’s hand in yours.

“Tell me what’s going on up there,” you pleaded. “Let’s see if we can help you sleep.”

Squeezing your hand, he scooted closer to you. “You might not like what you find in my head.” When you didn’t agree with him, he just sighed. “Sometimes, I imagine hurting them.”

“The guards?” you guessed.

“And the doctors. Make them know what it feels like to not have a choice.” Jongin’s grip on your hand tightened. “See how they’d like to be poked and dragged. Treated like nothing. I hate that I think this way, but it’s the only thing that’s keeping me from exploding completely.” You tried not to let your discomfort show as his hand squeezed yours tighter and tighter as he spoke, but the pain became too much and a whimper escaped. He panicked as he let go of your hand, pushing back away from you until his back slammed against the wall. “I’m sorry!”

“You’re okay,” you reassured him, holding your arms out to him, letting him know that no harm was done. “I’m fine. You’re just a little strong, that’s all. It was just an accident.”

Jongin turned his face away from you. “I think you should go.”

You frowned. “Jongin, you didn’t hurt me. I really think we should continue–”

“Go!” he growled, making you jump.

Now you really were hurt, just not physically. Obeying his wishes, you walked out of the room and back to the lab.

A blank screen stared out at you. What was supposed to happen was you were supposed to spend the day writing up your reports from your notes, ready to be given to Dr. Wang by the end of the day. But your interaction with Jongin less than twenty-four hours ago had you stumped.

Feeling a little lost after he’d kicked you out, you went through quick third rounds with Junmyeon, Baekhyun, and Kyungsoo. None of them were as dramatic, but you were obviously distracted during those times. Junmyeon even pointed it out a few minutes into the session, but you’d quickly changed the subject.

The reports of the last three weren’t too difficult to type up. It was Jongin that had you stumped because all you wanted was to scream about how all this was wrong and damaging and you hated it!

Your hand stung from where you’d slammed it on the metal table. It pulsed red as you lifted it up, sucking air through your teeth as if that would make it better.

“Is everything all right?”

Dr. Wang walked up to you, concerned.

“Just a gnat,” you lied.

She frowned, but didn’t contradict you. “Dr. (l/n), I need to speak with you about your sessions with the subjects.”

You gulped. This was it. Your lack of professionalism and obvious attachment had been found out. It was hard to resist the urge to hand over your badge right then and there.

“Unfortunately, as much as I prefer it otherwise, they will have to be stopped for the time being.”

You straightened up, trying to feign ignorance as to why this would be happening. “Why? Did I do something wrong?”

Dr. Wang shook her head. “No, Dr. Kwon just feels that it’s distracting for them. We’re stepping into the final phase and we just need them to be as focused as possible. One of them asked about you and when you were coming again. It was just concerning to Dr. Kwon.”

Your jaw dropped. This was not what you had mentally prepared for. “O-one of them asked about me?”

“Yes.” She sighed. “Subject Ninety-Four did.” Sehun. “He’s the most sensitive out of all of them. We concluded that it would be best for you to go ahead and turn back to your analysis duties for now. We’ll resume your sessions in a month or so.”

“A month?” You jumped up out of your seat. “Dr. Wang, I promise, I’m not a distraction. Truly, I’ve gotten some of them to open up to me. They need this.”

Dr. Wang shook her head. “I’m sorry, Dr. (l/n), but the decision has already been made. Simply save whatever you have gathered already. Be prepared to do some blood work tomorrow morning. There’s a large amount that needs to be dealt with.”

You could hardly believe this. Only a few weeks of getting to know them, and the rug was already being pulled out from under you. There was no room for argument. You simply had to follow orders. Would they all be okay after a month? Would they understand that this wasn’t your decision and you didn’t abandon them?

It was crushing. Defeated, you saved what little progress you had made on the desktop and shut everything down before running out of the lab and heading home, wanting to cuss up a storm.

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paraclete0407 · 3 years

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‘Some of My Memories of Milwaukee+ or a Personal Odyssey’ or ‘And in the Years of Doing Other Things’

2012

Talking with kind of ex-girlfriend never actually my girlfriend called her ‘think of you as my wife’ in letter ater wrote Mark Helprin-esque ‘disclaim you forever with canned blessing’ letters about Aristophanes’ ‘Lysistrata’ in which Greek women refuse their beds to the menfolk to induce them to stop warring. Max Beerbohm or someone said, ‘There is a God and h/His name is Aristophanes.’ I don’t believe that at all but he was a good-natured writer that I can tell and also wrote about clouds and birds apocalyptically or otherwise and made fun of Socrates which I approve of. I don’t know anything about Socrates; my ex-friend used to say ‘I LOVE Socrates,’ that he could feel Socrates’ love. Socrates would say things like ‘The law is the advantage of the powerful’ and stated that if he reached an after-life he would continue to ‘troll, hit up, impertinently or insidiously argue with’ people forever there. He said the after-life could be like sleep without a dream. My friend said something about New York City and a production of Lysistrata then I started making hyper-fanfictions already in which Girls Gen decided to stop performing until war stopped or something and threw a Christmas festival with vermillion-colored fruit compotes but I honestly don’t remember a lot & it refleted my ‘Love of the Last Tycoon’ etc.-esque delusion that Media and woman- and girl-training like Lee Sooman would enable me to influence humanity’s future in a really gainful way. Later on I told Tizzard that Media Studies is an endless kind of college dorm-bull-session and NKS was the real deal, that reality exists, that ‘Visual Pedagogy’ is an excuse for inferior faculty and no real curriculum or purpose but it didn’t really matter b/c kids / the poor in spirit love media - I loved media too. I rem. being so happy in college to skip Phonology one day to play Final Fantasy 10 and I still got an A b/c Phonology is a decently logical human suitable discipline for someone like me. There is a Korean word that kind of means ‘suitable’ that starts with ‘J’ in transliteration that used to mean a lot to me and also I conflate with a kind of ‘yes.’

This person was also like ‘Why did you say you would go back to KR’ as opposed to apply to CTC or be a literary agent to casting-couch desperate alienated lady-authors for fun and bragging-rights and I sold myself short saying it was all about drunken proclamations - I actually didn’t know what I wanted to do and kept ‘short-selling David James Johnston’ talking about TV-writing when I already sort of decided that the power of TV was just a money-making-vehicle and that TV would not really change people’s minds for the better but just hypnotize or mesmerize them with more of what Jay McInerney(?) pace some French satanico-moral philosopher called ‘empty beauty.’ I rec’d people Friday Night Lights and they became Amfootball-fetishists with a fake God-evasion-religion-system; rec’d ‘Generation Kill’ and instead of understanding the sadness of the Iraq War or the fact that people just like us w/ videogames and pornography and Jerry Springer and all the sad beauty of irreverence and sort of boyish self-pity in the world was being thrown teeth- and brains-first in to the walls of Fallujah. (Years later thinking stuff like what is fake news what is real news, was the ComGen of the 1st Marine Division right to dismiss the Col. who had been careful w/ fueling tanks and his men’s lives? Today did the USMC really disband their tank corps or is it more of a ‘clue.’)

I remember when this person was 24 and I did quasi-test-adultery-turned-in-to-actual-adultery in NYC; I kept thinking that my dream would come true if I were faithful. It puts me in mind in retrospect of ‘Adagio Cantabile’ from the ‘Pathetique’ in which the young boyish Beethoven keeps re-crossing and re-tracing and repressing the same few things. There was a kid in KR who was counting his pocket-change to buy snack noodles + he looked about as well-fed as Haitian kids today munching on clay-biscuits to ease their hunger-pains or North Koreans or Chinese eating corncobs and smoking meth to cope whilst his mom supposedly hoped be would become a basketball-player. Other kid’s om was working in a bar, constantly forgetting to check HW, so but, Counseling was really boffo / spec and just reminded her again and again b/c in some places there are still reasonable compliant obedient square people who don’t deflect from doing the right thing, just get overwhelmed at times and want a break. Ironically Ayn Rand once defined evil as ‘blanking out’ yet she herself was doing amphetamines, propounding complex justifications for adultery, smoking, bashing a revelatory tragic anti-Nazi but pro-Germany author called Thomas Wolfe in ‘The Romantic Manifesto’ - Wolfe also cared about Japanese, about humility in the publishing industry, about nurses.

I went to Whole Foods to get pineapple but there the story sort of ends. There was Boa Kwon or BoA whom I once saw on WLIW NJ public TV and thought it was someone else; in retrospect this person was too smooth for me to read at all and I have no faith or trust in such an one who would lash out egomaniacally at any one at any time, prob. beat their kid to death with a trowl then take a nap in the next room b/c ppl at a certain level are like careless military officers that decide one illegal or irresponsible order deserves another b/c it’s image-management, what Emerson calls ‘a foolish consistency,’ or Derek Chauvin-esque drive and desire and determination to magnify one’s little point.

Later I started to reticulate or conceive of Lee Sooman in terms of a failed priest or one who had repeatedly and almost orthodoxly dodged his vocation. ‘Black Collar.’ I guessed using my ‘amae-guess-magic-bullets’ that his wife’s name is Eunjin + thought then, I don’t even remember. Told some ppl who didn’t really care that love-dreams are good and ‘Love and Peace’ was great b/c whilst America was being sarcastic and deflectionistic about everything SNSD were like, ‘We will compose in C-natural; we will be Tolstoyian; we will make direct statements about reality.’ I felt ‘Everyday Love’ was about ‘cybernetics’ or adapting the natural ‘Spenglerian peasant wisdom self’ to ‘the cold intellect of the city / civilization / dying-but-peaking epochal imperial organization.’ During this same time in my life or thereabouts I read a neo-hyper-Nazi book called ‘Imperium’ by a guy who admired the kamikaze and called for ‘wars of annihilation’ as well as castigating America for her cult of the average. This person said Japan’s not weak at all, they accelerated or amplified Spengler’s admiration for the Roman soldier at Vesuvius who refused to abandon their post since no one gave them orders to leave. In re the which I can only surmise pace Grace to You that somewhere there are still ‘thoroughbreds’ like that. At other times in life I said stuff that got me trashed on RedditButBothSides for using terms like ‘social form’ and Paul Washer of HeartCry who summed up much of my own life in telling it that ‘the porn-addict and misogynist is unloving’ was praising the African father, I love the African-African (not American) minister at Christ Church Episcopalian but then I am like, ‘drmdrmdrm Zulu king marching all his warriors off a cliff to prove a point about authority.’ I’m really really a child of the 1990s, Gandhi, MLK, Tiananmen Square bag-man, flower-in-rifle-bore. I never expected to levitate the Pentagon but I truly believed that if we’re nice to them they will be nice to us.

Later I over-compensate the other way and started making ‘psychopathic midrash’ like, ‘What do you make of the Good Samaritan if the thieves are still beating the man half or more to death when the Samaritan arrives and what if the Samaritan has a taser, handgun, rifle, bayonet, how good are they at martial arts, what’s their chest-circumference, what’s their reputation.’ But again people hate this because its super-worldly and technocratic. I had started to admire fmr. President George W. Bush b/c I felt that he was pushing back against the people who wanted bad to go from bad to worse, b/c I agreed with him about immigration, and b/c I felt I saw progress in his life frankly and even in Trump’s life where he nuked his earlier marriages but remained faithful and respectful to Melania. Marie Lee has it out for Barron Trump I guess but he’s still neurophysiologically / neuroanatomically very much not a full adult and it’s also literally ‘Titus Andronicus’-esque revenge pornography to go after a leader’s kids like that + distracting from WW3, nuclear terrorism, DF-26 Black Death warheads, satellite-bombs, annihilating the entire Midwest’s population for the topsoil here; and because Jack London once said ‘The Chinese work too hard so we the freedom-loving peoples ought to kill them all with germ-weapons and take their land.’

I later started dreaming about KKOOM Orphanage, a cold morning, eating coffee-crystals, a basketball-court a bit like ‘Trabia Garden’ from FF8. I felt people learn a lot from poverty, limits, prison, commitment, losing things. Meanwhile ‘Shanghai-1′ is like you’re exotic male prostitute and she too is the typical Chinese-Singaporean-Japanese-wannabe-British anti-Korean racist who thinks Koreans are the n-----s of East Asia permanently deserving of subjugation and that we all ought to amuse ourselves by making sure they remain permanent hedonistic sensualists physicalists etc. Keep them thinking about hip-bones till the end of time + make sure we have EYK, reaction-vids, self-niggerization- / ethical-evolution-inhibition-engines such as PSY or really all of YGE.

When I used to blog about T-ARA, Eunjung, and my dumb adventures with a secret life several Black girls approached e and I remember them well; curiously turned out to be involved in incest and/or rape-trauma. I told ‘lonelystrangergirl’ she stood a good chance of finding ‘manly KBF’ if she joined the military but I didn’t then know or take cognizance of all the problems in the US military with women. The fmr. Vice President Mike Pence was on talk radio saying, ‘WOMEN in the MILITARY’ my relation is like, ‘Millennial guys were pozzed pussy flyboys and effeminate art-fags who couldn’t transcend their self-consciousness so it’s no wonder’ but those are also ppl’s daughters, moms, people whose simplicity and loveliness might actually inspire a few men to act like men, though that is a very old complaint at this point, hopeful Kim Minju’s of the soul and mind who want to do what they can when they can, the world’s telling them to be super-heroines and it appears to convect(?) towards ‘All Loves Excelling.’ I hate doing physiognomy but it’s like this generation of Valkyries like Else in the Thomas Wolfe novel who won’t say anything about Hitler.

Again however, JMC on Grace to You as saying, Christ is the Rock, pulverization.

2014.

There was a new Korean restaurant w/ a limited menu, a stringed instrument no one ever plays, Thai lampshades. I talked about General Petraeus a bit, yesterday’s wars the Korean 3-star general from Vietnam who was buried in an infantryman’s grave and talked about the caste-system in the North Korean military, about hundreds of thousands taking to sea to g out of NV. In retrospect IDK why I said anything! The ferry-sinking, I’m trying to say, ‘This is society; this is the pozzery of systems that don’t work; this is people who don’t even look at people ad think they know and care when they just made the Homer Simpson drip-bird-care-machine auto-billing, meretriciousness.’ I still think PGH took the fall for a bunch of men who devised the ROK Coast Guard and manned it, lesbian mysticist, hairstyle.

I wish I kept all my thoughts and feelings to myself b/c then I could’ve planned. That was Applebee’s which later moved to another location, hen to another, then was razed to he ground in like one night. I mentioned my old mentor or affectionate person ‘Lt. Col.’ who told me about saving people but it was more K-wave self-exploitation, song-and-dance, ultimately, schizoaffective self-sadism.

I liked ‘Library’ by TTS a lot but didn’t realize it is about emotional-epistemic hedonism or wallowing in how much you could do and how useful you knowledge is or could be. Later they did ‘Adrenaline.’ I am ‘Mr. Seo.’ SJH’s dad. I’ve seen this a trillions times and I want to open up my ‘answer-macihne-gun’ and be like, ‘don’t listen to Black people; they all all all have the same mentality tow you. Snoop says he’s a sex-trafficker and that’s precisely what he is; that’s what he is increasingly is and wants to be and is.’ Why did they let him in the ROK at all, except to put him on trial for crimes abroad against Korean nationals? As this New Yorker cartoon said, ‘I’ll think outside the box when there is no more money in the box.’

My best friend was traumatized by people like this although there again I ended up even more the worse for wear b/c I started cursing and threatening ppl and stuff.

TTS however got super-fantastic for at least a little while with SJH’s song ’Only U’ which in retrospect might or might not have been self-composed b/c it’s a Taylorian era and ‘only you can make me,’ in which we become our truest selves by being understood. This song didn’t even say anything except for a few moments at the very end and as with many things in this era the fan-covers were more perfect than the commercial versions b/c it is again the desperate love of the poor in spirit for leaders and ‘pharons’ (beacons) that makes sth or s1 seem better, seem perfect.

Celebrity-culture and much of politics are about money, power, image, and corporatistic lesson-teaching / mental Derek Chauvinism. But these are starting to be empty words.

2008.

Writing a long letter to s1 who had other people. Why do not I edit all day. I still remember thinking how these athletes at RU had really great low BF% despite eating junk food so I tried to eat junk food but felt like a loser. I didn’t realize then that everyone was tagging everyone all the time.

‘If only they had stayed in h/Hot p/Pursuit...’ I decided to nuke my undergraduate syntax and just start every sentence with ‘They.’ Setpiece in Denver. I talked about ‘agape’ (Gr. word about Christ’s Charity or Christian concern for the soul which I don’t speak Greek), about hotels with doors between the rooms. But then there was all this in retrospect very obvious trash about overachievers and Asians which was trying to share one world w/ people from another who didn’t really want it. Like FF.net people saying ‘We really admired you; a lot of us are kind of stuck in the trailer-park and we know RapMonster is far distant from us but we like that your admiration of RM has been getting you somewhere.’ Wanting to take everyone along when in fact some of them want to let you go; my friend KateLorraine’s North Star column from FFnet long ago where it is like ‘Let us teach everyone in the universe to be self-sufficient writers and literary critics of life as well as perfect book-reviewers of ev1 they ever meet with the perfect savoir-faire action-response-system-protocol pace Colossians 4:6.’

This could make everyone friends with everyone today but I later came to see that t/Trust is something ‘circumscribed.’ It’s like Mirabel says in this Cogreve play that would need to be heavily footnoted by Bethlehem Seminary, ‘Let us be very reserved.’ Why party? Why celebrate being a couple? There’s this tiny hint of something at the end of the Song of Songs, ‘My small-breasted little sister, who’s gonna marry her?’ I for years ‘kept my virtue to myself’ b/c it is like Russian suitcase-nukes, anti-family, anti-couples, anti-biblical(?), anti-God, to say couples shouldn’t trash others behind their backs. I failed to appreciate the total ‘Shakespearea-irony-sized’ or idolatrous / cupiditinous implication in songs like ‘Red Is the Rose’ or a novel called ‘Angel and Hannah’ which I still hve no summative statement on b/c it as just the 1990s and what Stephen Crane might characterize as the defiant, prideful, Son of Morning-esque devouring of one’s own bitter heart. I re. years ago someone said Japanese like falling flowers and Chi like fallen flowers. Ppl rly love their fallen flowers and what they used to be.

There are people on 4chan or all over this world that keep little dreams, hope-chests. I want to say it can happen, the girl eating noodles can really make something, but maybe I as being a huckster and cultistic love-bomber in pushing everyone to leave home or secretly plot to ditch their family and burn their family’s expectations and social forms. Again, IDK why Reddit won’t let me say ‘social form’ when all the smart people are saying social form. But I am unhappy too b/c some ppl do not even have a social form or expectation but just the mind-machine that they’ll never make up. ‘Let us be humble and faithful and very reserved.’

2013.

‘Jericho.’ Guy with all these flashdrives always taking notes, but why. Just accept failure and rejection and give your body and presence to the task at hand. I also made something pre-Covid called ‘Rorate Caeli Desuper et Nubes Pluant Justum’ from an Eastern European composer’s setting about kind of an unauthored person who kept veering from father-figure to father-figure but that too say cynical and IDK why I was attacking women, failing to relate, writing endnotes to the living. I see to this is what happens when you stand around regarding what others have and are trying to forget particular actions or subsume their significance in some broader supposed mission. This too was fanfic-ified / plagiarized from a real person which is part of why I guess I didn’t go anywhere with it; hoping to do something IRL.’ A speculative phi.-of-teaching piece called ‘When To Care’ but there again it’s Milwaukee Judgment and cf. Levinas, ethical interruption, unethical interruption(?). ‘Teach You.’

‘Winter Presences’ from BoA’s ‘Always,’ failed couple rituals. ‘Perhaps a pizza.’ There was a Philip Roth or somebody’s novel and it crystallized for a sec bu in retrospect again, no real intended audience or beneficiary. Delta Covid, also Lam(b?)da Covid, sudden transposition / teleportation of 3rd world perils to ex 1st world. Heavily censor ‘On the Road,’ when they go to Mexico, ‘a bomb had come... and we would in the same same way...’ I remember the moment I was shocked and arrested by a Korean poem called ‘Flower’ which repeats a word sth like ‘desire’ and uses a phrase that people called ‘And we’ but is more like ‘And we all of us’ or even stronger than that, beginning and end. I wish I could sew or insert a syringe reliably. Power of children and little people.

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agechat514 · 3 years

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Dating Personals Delta Utah

Gender

Male| 38

Country

United States

City

Delta

State

Utah

Height

5'11'

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Age

Eye Color

Blue

Body Type

Average

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Blonde

Ethnicity

Caucasian

Denomination

Non-Denominational

Browse Delta Utah personals for free on jumdates.com, the leading free dating website for singles to find a companion easily and quickly. Most of the Delta singles are listed here with detailed profiles including photographs and personal interests. Browse the personals to find the person of your choice. Chat online for free to know him/her better. Just your average book worm. I'm half creepypasta ^-^ I'm dating Jeff the killer, Liu and Toby are my bestie I cosplay and I love anime name the.

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Finding Christ through Nature

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Once or Twice a month

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Single

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Specialty/Trade School

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Self Employed.

Interests

Camping, Fishing, Hunting, Hiking, Photography, Hotsprings, Mountains, rocks and minerals

About Me

For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, but loses his soul? Interests Camping Fishing Hunting Hiking Freedom Ron Paul Rand Paul Gold Silver Rocks Minerals Natural Remedies Jesus Christ Essential oils Prospecting Mountains Exploration Metallurgy Cooking Copper Fossils Hot springs Life less ordinary About Nathan I feel like I am on a totally different planet compared to most people, on my way of thinking, I believe do to the fact that I am Libertarian, was Home schooled and raised on a 400 acre alfalfa, corn and wheat and cattle farm. A INFJ Personality type which is about 1% of the men on this planet... It feels like 99.9% of the people I talk to are all the same even if they are slightly different on their way of thinking, What happened to Morals, values? What happened to everyone being totally Uniquely and different? having an imagination? wanting to break away from the whole norm? get away from the rat race, enjoy life even if it doesn't mean being filthy rich, or having job security, when really a having garden and trying to be happy and healthy and Faith in God is the only security you really can have. I think I was born in the wrong generation, I find myself identifying more with Older people then I do with most people my age or younger. I am tired of Superficial people It really seams like that is about how most people are these days, I don't care about any sports team unless maybe a friend that I support is involved, it seams like Sports and Hollywood have become our Modern day Idols and worship centers even though most people don't realize it. TV is Nice to numb the brain but really don't care about it at all, I'd rather have the night sky be my TV... I am a Christian, Libertarian and a Entrepreneur. I am Jack of all trades. I can cook, work on cars, computer repairs, fix broken electronics, plumbing and electrical and many other things I've learned how to do having an open mind. Since I grew up and we never had a lot of money to buy new things that often so we fixed things not throw them away, though it did lead to having junk piles on our 500 acres and what not but still... my point is I learned a lot of skills you don't learn going to 50 years schooling.. I am pretty sure I am unlike anyone you have ever met, all though I do not let a lot of people get close to me I have a hard time trusting anyone anymore after being used and hurt to much, and I being an extremely nice guy and easy going I've had people take advantage of me lie to me use me and betray me. I like Natural God Given herbal remedies over the whole medical mess we have going on these days that is more about money then curing anyone. I AM NOT LOOKING FOR A 1 NIGHT. I want something deep connection and meaningful. Money is a means to an end, Success it meaningless unless its at helping others. the best things in life are free and didn't cost a penny, good friends are hard to find and in short supply these days. If you want to try to get to know me feel free to send me a message... I've never smoked, done drugs, or been drunk even though I've had a drink everyone once in a while... What I�m doing with my life Trying to Work outside of all the trash going on in the world and the rat race, trying to stay motivated when sometimes it seams like its all for nothing..... It isn't easy being me Empath, I need an Adventure partner who's my best friend to sit under the stars talking about Life, dreams and talking about everything Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food The Bible, Ron Paul - The Revolution, all kinds of music -- but not most rap. I enjoy all kinds of food, chicken, shepherd's pie, venison, dove, pheasant, and elk. Orange chicken. ( I can make it myself) The six things I could never do without Family, Friends, Jesus Christ, God, Prayer, food, Freedom, Liberty, The Constitution. The strength/courage to stand up for what I believe in and help weaker people when no one else does. Being able to think for myself have my own views and opinions. Having people I can look up to as being my heroes like so many of Our founding fathers like Thomas Jefferson Freedom I spend a lot of time thinking about The current state of affairs effecting this once great Country, what kind of bondage our we selling our future generations in to with so much Spending and debt? how to make a living with out working for the Man. Off the Grid Living- getting away from most modern technologies and things that really don't make life any easier because we lose a piece of our self when we can't get away from ' technology' I am Pro Life, you can't have a choice if you Don't first have life....... Why are animals more protected then the unborn children ? You should message me if ...you are pretty much drama free, you're an easy-going, decent person, or if you would like to make a good friend... you like Ron Paul, Rand Paul, getting involved to defend our liberty. Ok so I have talked about me and I like to be honest I am Human and I have my demons I fight daily Depression, Anxiety, IBS, allergies, my back is messed up and my knees hurt once in a while when I go hiking to far... I have a hard time trusting anyone, and or getting close to me, I've also had Dysgraphia and tinnitus since I was a kid... I am an introvert, quite... Why should you message me ? well I am very unique, Honest, Loyal, loving, thoughtful, caring. once a real friend I try to be a good friend... I think I'd make someone a great husband one day even with all my flaws and problems I face I mean cmon who doesn't have their own problems to face why face them alone ??? . I want to live a life less ordinary.... I want someone to enjoy life with........my best friend my lover to grow old with to make out of life what we can working together through good and bad times.... If You read all of this Kudos to you, I've been single a Long time so I keep adding to this.

First Date

Hiking or picnicking in the park, or fishing or somewhere we can talk and get to know each other. defiantly not dinner and movie like most people do

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orbemnews · 3 years

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The Mogul in Search of a Kinder, Gentler Capitalism A self-made multimillionaire who married into a revered European banking dynasty, Lynn Forester de Rothschild now spends her time calling for higher taxes on the wealthy, stricter regulation of big business and a wholesale reordering of the capitalist system that has delivered her such privilege. It is an unlikely reformation for a woman who came from modest origins, made a fortune in the 1980s and could have spent her later years enjoying a sumptuous life of aristocracy. Born to a middle-class family in the New Jersey suburbs, Ms. Rothschild began her career at the white shoe law firm Simpson, Thacher and Bartlett, then started working with John Kluge, a telecommunications mogul, in the 1980s. Ms. Rothschild eventually struck out on her own, working for, running and founding a series of successful media companies. In 2000, she married Sir Evelyn de Rothschild, a British financier. (Henry Kissinger introduced them at the Bilderberg conference; the Clintons invited them to honeymoon at the White House.) Despite her pedigree, Ms. Rothschild has in recent years come to understand that while she and her associates have enjoyed the fruits of capitalism, not all have fared so well. Many workers are struggling to get by. The environment is in serious trouble. Government often cleans up the private sector’s messes. Sociable and well-connected, Ms. Rothschild has tapped her expansive network to launch a multipronged assault on the status quo. In 2014, she founded the Coalition for Inclusive Capitalism, an effort to get business leaders more engaged in environmental and social issues. And she has parlayed that into a related group, the Council for Inclusive Capitalism, that is working with Pope Francis, and a new fund focused on socially responsible investing she founded with Jeff Ubben, a successful hedge fund manager. This interview was condensed and edited for clarity. Back when you were starting out in your career, were you concerned about some of the negative impacts of capitalism in the same way you are today? It was really different. I don’t think we realized how bad it was. Graduating from law school in 1980, I believed I was living the American dream. I was a skinny girl from nowhere who knew no one, who had aspirations for an interesting life that would make a difference. And I believed that was available to me if I worked hard and played by the rules. The mantra at that time, that was not said disparagingly, was “Greed is good.” There was an Ayn Rand view that if you pursue your interests, all of society is lifted. So I really did believe that all I needed to do was to pursue my career in a legal, ethical, exciting way, and I didn’t have to worry about society. When did it click for you that something wasn’t working? We didn’t anticipate the kind of disparity that developed over those 20 years when we started in 1980. And I don’t think people practicing shareholder primacy were evil. There was just too much greed. But by 2008 it was impossible to ignore. The concentration of wealth in America at that time already was back to levels we had during the Gilded Age. In the 1960s the ratio of C.E.O. pay to average worker pay was 25 to one. Today it is 320 to one. That has very conveniently created enormous personal wealth, which became the objective, as opposed to: What wealth have you left behind in society? How have you made the world better for your children, for your community? “Greed is good” was never a concept for Adam Smith. What do you see as the most problematic symptoms of our economic system today? Inequality of opportunity. We have to be honest that in each of our two recent crises — the great financial crisis and the Covid crisis — the government came to the aid of the wealthiest. Some have called it “socialism for the rich and capitalism for everyone else.” There’s something to that. The elites turn to government when the financial system is blown up or we have a health crisis. Government got us out of both of those problems, and it got us out with too much of the benefit going to the richest. So how do we equalize that? I personally am fine with higher taxes, if higher taxes lead to better distribution of opportunity, particularly for people of color and people in the lower part of the socioeconomic environment. I also believe that it is time that we listen more to our employees. It’s time that we create a more level playing field with respect to worker voice and worker involvement. This is hard stuff, because it can impact profit. A year ago you said Covid was going to change capitalism forever. In what way did you think it was going to change capitalism, and how do you think that all has actually played out? I’m probably always guilty of being overly optimistic. I believed that our moral compass would tell us that we need to take better care of the people who take care of us. But we saw starkly how we treated the people we called essential, how we were exposing them to this deadly disease. I personally find it difficult to understand why that is so hard for us as a society, and that’s why I founded the Council for Inclusive Capitalism. I had the disease. I was really sick. I thought I was going to die. I had a really bad case and I’m scared to death of it. What were the origins of the Council for Inclusive Capitalism? In June of 2015, Laudato Si was written by Pope Francis. By September, the Sustainable Development Goals were agreed to by the United Nations. By December, the Paris climate accord had been signed. You had every reason to believe that there was a sense of the common good. And if you go back and read Laudato Si, Pope Francis writes: “The lessons of the global financial crisis have not been assimilated, and we are learning all too slowly the lessons of environmental deterioration.” He goes on to say that “by itself the market cannot guarantee integral human development and social inclusion.” What are some of the reforms you’d like to see? The Business Roundtable can put out as many press releases as it wants about stakeholder capitalism, but we still have companies losing billions of dollars, laying off tens of thousands of workers and still rewarding their C.E.O.s with tens of millions of dollars. Something is really broken. I do believe that C.E.O.s and boards are willing to share the wealth and do more. But the Chamber of Commerce and the Business Roundtable are going to go for tax policy and trade policy as their primary objective. I remember a person who was very senior in a previous administration told me that in his four years in office, only one C.E.O. asked to go and see him about an issue of the common good. Everyone was coming in to push what they needed for their own book. We need to profitably solve the problems of people and planet. That’s why business exists. Who’s to say that there shouldn’t be a government policy that prices the negative externalities that companies cost the taxpayer when full-time workers have to be on public assistance to lead a decent life? Why can’t there be a tax and a penalty on that? Why is Jeff Bezos the richest man in the world? He’s a nice guy, and at the same time he has tens of thousands of employees on public assistance. Why is that OK? Why do we have a government that lets that happen? Which do you think is more broken, American politics or capitalism? I think their problems feed upon each other. They’re creating a death spiral together and it’s got to be stopped. Politics and capitalism needs to return to a basic sense of decency. And that is actually why I reached out to the Holy Father, because I think that a lot of what it will take to change behavior is a moral and ethical reawakening. It’s not just one policy, it’s not just taxes, it’s not just reforming labor laws — all of which are important, and we need competent ethical people to do it. But at the core of it, it has to come from common decency. God did not invent the corporation. Society allows a corporation to exist, gives shareholders limited liability, and expects something in return. But we don’t just expect cheap widgets. How do you reconcile your critique of shareholder capitalism with the fact that you’re now working with a hedge fund manager? If there is going to be a system change, the capital markets need to reward shareholders. That is only going to happen if there are really talented investors who find the new levers of value creation, and are engaging actively with companies that are transforming at scale to become cleaner and more inclusive, and those companies become the ones that are the most valuable. Then we’ve created a race to the top. That’s why I’m in partnership with Jeff, who’s such a legend in shareholder value creation and transforming companies. I have 1,000 percent confidence in the integrity of Jeff, even though he’s been on the opposite side for many years. I trust many billionaires. Source link Orbem News #Capitalism #Gentler #Kinder #Mogul #Search

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nakediconoclast · 3 years

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Bracken: Professor Raoul X Posted on January 14, 2011

Western Rifle Shooters Association

It was late June and I was sitting in a café seven hundred miles from home, doing a little web surfing. There was plenty of room at mid-morning, so I could sit at the end of the coffee bar with my laptop. I was scanning the breaking news about the new mass-shooting. Like most people I was morbidly fascinated with the deranged young man who was the killer. That is, the trigger puller. But I was looking over his shoulder for something else: signs of a guiding hand.

Why? Because I know something about the subject.

You see, being a guiding hand is my life’s avocation. My secret avocation, that is. Outwardly I’m a tenured professor of sociology at a Mid-western university. A life-long bachelor, so my summers are my own. Ostensibly for writing, research, quiet reflection, bungee jumping or what have you. My summer hobby is traveling and meeting interesting people. Everything I do on these road trips can be explained under the rubric of field research, but even so I pay with cash and move like a ghost. I’m old school. It’s a harmless quirk. Nobody cares.

I suppose if you polled my students, they’d declare me to be left wing, but not a rhetorical bomb-thrower. Am I closer to Karl Marx than to Ayn Rand? Well, naturally. Progressive politics were part of my upbringing and education. And of course that is also the best way to get along in academia, and I do like to get along.

No question my academic career has been lackluster. That does not concern me. I have no wife or significant other to be concerned with my apparent lack of greater ambition or wealth. Seeking publication for papers that a few academic gnomes might eventually peruse does not interest me in the least. Writing some groundbreaking tome that will be reviewed in the New York Times and read by millions is not a realistic aspiration. I am no Jared Diamond in the rough. I won academic tenure, and that was enough. I have a house and a ten-year-old Beamer. I enjoy my little comforts. A small circle of friends, none close. I’d be the first to admit it’s been a mediocre life—outwardly.

But my secret life has been anything but mediocre. I have engineered extraordinary events, but truth be told, there is little joy in secret celebration. So I am creating this document, properly encoded and hidden, to save for posterity. When my unsurpassed run is finally over, due either to my natural demise or other more precipitous causes, my secret history will conjure itself from millions of computer screens unfiltered, unspun and uncut. The truth will be known. This is my story, and no one can take it from me. My name will ring down through the ages, when my complete story is told!

But not yet. There is more secret work to be done.

I did not drive seven hundred miles to ponder my life’s ledger and tap on a keyboard. What interested me was the creature standing on the other side of the white coffee shop counter. The gaunt, long-haired young man by the espresso machine could have been taken for a college student in a college town. Really not too bad looking in person. Pushing six feet, skinny. Gray-blue eyes, a little too closely set. Decent complexion for his age. Maybe a few days since his mouse-colored hair had been washed or properly brushed, but overall he was quite presentable. Duncan it said on his plastic name tag. I already knew that his last name was McClaren. I wasn’t in this picturesque college town by accident. I was here to meet him, but he didn’t know this.

Duncan McClaren was one of the most promising prospects I’d run down in years. My own students unknowingly provide me with many of my leads. We have free-ranging discussions, in and out of the classroom setting. From practice I know how to guide them toward a discussion of the weirdest people they’ve ever known. Duncan went to high school with one of my female students. His first name was mentioned casually by the student, tossed off her lips and promptly forgotten. Duncan sometimes heard voices, she said. Talked to himself. And he could not stop talking about whatever obsessed him at the moment. He cut right into conversations among people he hardly knew, and went off onto bizzaro-world tangents. And what really set him off was the country’s most famous talk radio host.

Following that disclosure I did my own internet research. There was only one Duncan listed in her year at her high school. As a professor, I stay on the cutting edge of internet trickery. A critical part of my secret avocation involves doing internet research without leaving digital fingerprints. My students constantly come up with what they believe to be new ways to cheat or plagiarize without detection, so I’ve become somewhat of an expert at internet security. I do not take risks. I’m a very careful person. Typing this secret history and hiding it inside my computer is perhaps the biggest risk I’ve taken.

In the course of my background investigation I learned that he had been expelled or otherwise ejected from high school numerous times. He’d been arrested and he’d been to juvenile boot camp. There were a number of sealed records and denied files, both medical and legal. But reading between the lines of what I could access, it was a safe guess that there had been serious drug use and there had been family violence. Rumors of arson at a very young age. His family had money and pull, and he was accepted for admission to an out-of-state institution of higher learning. His brief transcript was telling. His GPA for three completed semesters was made up equally of As and Fs. He had not finished his second year. No reason was given.

Since dropping out of college Duncan had been adrift for a year, hitchhiking around the country, supporting himself mostly as a dish washer or at other menial short-term jobs involving limited social interaction. On his own walkabout journey of self-discovery, to give him the benefit of the doubt. He was for the moment a barista in this New England college town, and I arranged for our paths to cross.

It’s always an intense moment, my first close look at a subject I’ve known only as an internet phantom. Duncan came over to take my order: regular coffee, with cream and sugar. When he filled my cup I laid a few dollars on the counter.

Duncan tapped the bills and said matter-of-factly, “So, somebody still believes in paper money.”

I looked directly at him and replied, “For some things, yes. Like paying for coffee.”

He returned my gaze, his eyes narrowed to slits and he said, “Smart. Fly under the radar. Render unto Caesar—while you can. But it’s all just a matter of time. Just a matter of time.” He slowly nodded his head, as if agreeing with himself.

To release his floodgates all I had to ask him was, “What do you mean?” Then I listened attentively to a five minute diatribe covering many tediously familiar theories and a few original ones. A thirtyish female with a severe hairstyle, whom I guessed was the café’s manager, edged over and tried to redirect my waiter. “Dunc,” she said breezily, “You’re not bothering this man, are you? No more talking about that bank stuff, right?”

Holding the full pot of hot coffee he slowly turned his entire body and fixed an icy glare upon her, but said nothing. He held his stare, boring into her with flat eyes. His arm seemed tensed to hurl the burning-hot brew at her. Her smile wilted, she turned and walked away. “She doesn’t understand,” said Duncan when she was gone. “Her mind is closed to the reality around her.”

“Does that bother you?” I asked him.

“I’m used to it. Ninety percent of humanity is closed off to reality.”

I laughed and said, “I think you’re giving humanity too much credit.”

He smiled in a peculiar way. One side of his mouth went up markedly while the other side remained nearly flat. “Yeah. Probably. Look, I have to serve some other humanity or I’m going to get canned. I’m on thin ice around here.”

Twenty-year-old Duncan, who had a post-graduate’s demeanor and a startlingly high IQ, had never held a job for longer than a month. He could operate independently in society as a functioning adult in most situations. He could shop for himself and drive a car. He’d briefly kept an apartment in college. But he could not hold a conversation without promptly veering into the Bush-family CIA dynasty, the truth about 9-11, the Jewish bankers, right-wing talk radio and God help me, the Queen of England.

Duncan was a bug. A raving lunatic. Yet in his outward appearance and mannerisms, he was as normal as you and I. But what does one’s outward appearance signify? The faces we show to the world are mere avatars, are they not? Who truly knows our inner hearts, our souls if you will? No one. Certainly not a God who doesn’t exist. So am I normal? Define normal. A sophomoric tautology. Yes, outwardly I can easily pass as normal, and I have for most of my forty-seven years. But inside? Honestly, what a question. Who wants to be no more than a random semi-conscious insect in a hive of billions?

Not me. No, I’m not normal, and have no desire to be.

Normal means average, and let me assure you, I’m way above average. Average people don’t make it their life’s work to ferret out certain types of borderline personalities and convert them into useful tools. As far as I know, I’m the only human toolmaker of my kind. No semi-sentient insect brain resides within my skull, making me a slave to laws, traditions or norms of so-called acceptable behavior. I operate outside of the rules of the hive, and I enjoy a freedom mere insects can never know. So what, you say? I’ll say what. By my actions I have personally changed the course of history, and I will do so again.

Can you say the same thing? What “normal” hive insect can claim to have done that?

Have there been others like me? I tend to think so, but it’s an area of pure conjecture. A familiar example. Most Americans dismissed the story of James Earl Ray’s mysterious helper, known only to him as “Raoul,” as a self-serving fantasy. I always thought that Raoul was more flesh than fantasy. James Earl Ray’s actions and travels before and after Memphis make me believe that he had assistance of the kind that I have given to some very special people.

If you take a ‘Parallax View’ of history, you might allow the possibility that rogue government agencies or other cliques could also be grooming likely candidates, but I tend not to believe in elaborate conspiracies. Could it happen? I suppose. But in my experience, no conspiracy involving a large cast of characters can remain a secret for many years.

On the other hand, the temporary private relationship between a mentor and a singular student, that relationship can indeed be kept a secret. My writing this secret history in freedom instead of in captivity proves that this is so. And even if one of my human tools is someday arrested alive, his mad barkings will be disregarded. His minor side-story of a mysterious helper, if heard at all, will be disregarded as just another in his cornucopia of delusions.

Converting a certain type of lunatic into a useful tool is not too difficult when you understand the dynamics that are in play. Practice makes perfect, and I’ve had a lot of practice. Good candidates for a direct action mission are often quite intelligent, at least as measured on certain scales. They can navigate by themselves between cities, and arrive at a place and time without causing alarm to the general population.

But in my experience the best candidates for a guiding hand are not true “loners.” They often seek friendship and employment, and they may even succeed for a while. But the men who interest me invariably sabotage their social relationships by compulsively discussing their paranoid obsessions. Each human rejection adds heat to their simmering rage. Yet still they crave human companionship, and simple affirmation of their delusional belief systems. This makes them soft putty at my touch. These men, deftly guided, become my arrows. To the world, these arrows seem to plunge at random from the clear blue sky. Sometimes they do, but not always!

It’s not hard to convert a lump of inchoate anger into an arrow. At first all I do is offer them a receptive ear, and confirmation that they are not alone in their beliefs. Our dialogues lead me toward the best approach to take. I adapt my temporary cover story to fit my current subject’s preexisting delusional views. In the past I’ve pretended to be a liaison from the CIA, from Mossad, from Al Qaeda. I’ve posed as a former leading member of the Trilateral Commission, now working against their globalist designs. Sometimes I’ve convinced them that their medications are part of a conspiracy to chemically lobotomize them, robbing them of their most brilliant insights.

After a few private conversations I eventually steer the subject to “doing something really important.” Hypothetically, of course. At least at first. Then we play a conversational game of, “If I could, I would.” A good prospect will soon be describing the precise medieval tortures, punishments and execution methods merited by his worst enemies. Once I have tapped into his personal fantasy realm of gory revenge, it’s “game on,” as they say in the vernacular.

At that point it really doesn’t matter to me who or what is the focus of the subject’s hate, or what group he blames for his own shortcomings or for the ills of the world. Left, right, capitalism, socialism, religion, nationalism…in truth I stopped caring very much about them long ago. When an action will advance the cause of social justice that’s great, but generalized mayhem is also a worthy end in itself. “The worse, the better,” in Lenin’s words. Create the pre-revolutionary conditions. Some days I still half believe the old dogma. But at least I’m not just another insect in the hive.

I slid my empty cup away, and awaited the return of my barista. In a minute I’d be commiserating with him, discovering that we were practically soulmates, rare men of true vision. Posing as an out-of-town business visitor, I’d ask him the best place in the area to eat. It would turn out that he and I shared similar culinary and beverage tastes, fancy that! And I’d gladly spring for lunch or dinner if he’d agree to be my local guide. Then we’d discuss further his hatred for the Jewish bankers who run the world, and the right-wing talk radio hosts who are their willing accomplices and mouthpieces. At least, in the world according to Duncan McClaren.

Right-wing talk radio was very much on my mind, because one of the icons of that loathsome industry was going to be passing through the region two weeks hence. Ben Rafferty wasn’t the king of right-wing hate radio, but he was one of the rising princes, nearly up there with the big three. Currently he was on a national book tour, promoting his latest toxic spill of racist hate-speech. Oh happy day, his entire schedule, with bookstore locations, dates and times, was available online.

I’d discovered some other useful information in an interview Rafferty had given to a pro-gun blog. The talk host traveled without an armed bodyguard, due to the vagaries of conflicting state gun laws. This was particularly a problem when flying into New York or New Jersey. It was just too damn hard to stay in compliance with a thousand local gun laws that could cause you to be imprisoned over a technical firearms violation. So instead of an armed bodyguard, he had some kind of karate guy for protection. An ex-soldier who had been wounded in one of America’s wars of imperialism. Poor Ben Rafferty, who never saw an assault rifle he didn’t want to French kiss, couldn’t have a gun during his East Coast book tour. Beautiful.

The imminent proximity of Duncan McClaren and Ben Rafferty had brought me seven hundred miles to this coffee shop. With a little stroking and massaging of Duncan’s twisted and deformed ego, I hoped to convince him that his empty life could at long last have genuine meaning. He could make a real difference! He could change the world! He could accomplish something important, and be remembered forever. I already had an untraceable pistol to provide him, if he proved receptive to my guiding hand. Oh, the mayhem potential, when one of the leading right-wing haters is finally knocked off! Mayhem-fest, indeed. Mayhem squared. Mayhem cubed!

Radio talker Ben Rafferty meant nothing to me, but he had millions of rabid right-wing followers who clung to his every screech and scream for three hours a day. After Duncan McClaren approached the book-signing table, pulled out his pistol and gave his miserable life meaning, Rafferty’s fans would rise en masse in blind rage. And a few of his most rabid fans, feeding their own dark fantasies, would predictably strike out in violent reprisal against progressive leaders. Secondary explosions, if you will. A chain reaction, possibly my greatest work ever.

Duncan returned to my end of the bar when he saw my empty cup. While he poured my refill I quietly said, “You know, you’re right about those Jewish bankers and how they control talk radio. They’re all in New York, right? I mean, most people have no idea what’s going on around them.”

His eyes widened and a half-smile formed on his lips. He set the coffee pot down and leaned on the counter until his nose was a foot from mine. One eyebrow raised in expectation above the high side of his demented grin. He glanced back down the counter to see who was in earshot and then said, “You know about the Illuminati, right?”

Did I ever.

I smiled.

This plan might actually work. I’d know better after a long conversation with Duncan McClaren in a dark restaurant. Duncan might be my masterpiece, the one to light the fuse of Civil War Two. And if he does, eventually I want the world to know who handed him the matches, the gun and Ben Rafferty’s book-signing schedule.

But for now just call me Professor Raoul X, a guiding hand of history.

*************************************

Fiction by Matthew Bracken, author of the Enemies Foreign And Domestic trilogy and the upcoming Castigo Cay.

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irondevilpunisher · 7 years

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ferrellcat1122

replied to your link “The Defenders: The Redemption of Iron Fist and Danny Rand”

I know I'm in the minority on Danny, but I actually loved how he was portrayed in Iron Fist and it will be good to see him grow and adjust to living in New York again. Most found his childishness annoying, but I found it kind of endearing. It's difficult to adjust to a society that views you as different when you don't see yourself that way. Danny was rich and home-schooled and fairly isolated even before he went to Kun L'un so that part didn't really change. Danny was still isolated in Kun L'un, but he was also disciplined harshly. I remember Joy thought it was abusive and, to some extent, Danny agreed, and I've given it a lot of thought.

She's right, but the other side of the story is interesting when considered. Kun L'un can be harsh environment between the temperatures and the mountains. The training was grueling. I think the 'abuse' was meant to desensitize Danny physically so he could survive. It was harsh yet necessary.Then he was emotionally "restrained." Instead of harnessing his emotions to draw strength from, he was taught to bury them all. No wonder he's such a child. He's never had a sense of normalcy on any level. He'll chill out, but he needs to grow and develop in New York and learn to balance what he was with what he is now.

You know what’s interesting for me is that as I’ve researched further into Danny Rand's background the more I realize what a tragic soul he actually is. I can see why Finn gravitated to him so easily. Danny suffered the worst kind of pain losing his family; survived a horrific ordeal so he’s got serious PTSD. Was raised by people from a mystic land completely alien to him. Forced to grow up quickly in harsher climates so he never got experience a normal childhood or adolescence which explains his peculiar behavior as an adult. And he never knew what real love or companionship felt like; he was completely cut off from the world and all aspects that make a person human.

He was abused daily; mentally, physically, racially and emotionally all to prepare him for his destiny. You’re right about the harsh treatments Danny underwent in Kun L'un, they were definitely to strengthen him and his chi. The munks had to make certain their Iron Fist could survive the battles ahead. In other words he was treated like a weapon, an object they wanted to use to benefit Kun L’un. I think this is where Danny gains a rebellious streak, he remembers a little of what his life was like in New York. It was safer and more comfortable and he wanted to go back to that. He was like a little lost boy searching for family and love. I really liked the way they had Finn portray that it made sense to the character and yes he was very endearing.

Danny had suffered great traumas in his life, stuff that has affected him psychologically and emotionally yet retains such a positive, sunny disposition and innocence. If you survived a plane crash, then were raised under abusive circumstance by strange people from the tender age of 10 going on 15 years later, you would not come back as mentally stable mature twenty-something; certainly not if you were isolated from the world and only taught to be a weapon. Danny had to find his way back to civilization and learn how to be human again. He needed to find that balance between who he was and what he’d become. I’m surprised he even turned out as good-natured as he is considering what he’d been through. In my humble opinion I thought the first season of IF and Defenders did a decent job evolving his character from a boy to a man; its going to make for an interesting arc in S2.

Its like Finn said, Danny didn’t even know what a superhero was let alone how to interact with other adults. He needed to figure it all out on his own terms. If he’d just dawned a costume and pursued a life of crime-fighting right away like Daredevil when he returned to NY it would’ve looked ridiculous. As flawed as the first series was it was necessary. The writers needed Danny to rediscover himself and both IF and Defenders fleshed him out to the point where he is mature enough to take on those responsibilities. Defenders marked the end of one journey and the beginning of another; the journey of becoming the hero Danny’s meant to be. You’re not in the minority on this, so many people do love Danny Rand and how he was portrayed including myself. I found him relatable and irresistible yet fun. And I can’t wait to see what they do with him in IF2.

#danny rand #finn jones #iron fist #the defenders #marvel's iron fist #marvel's defenders #danny rand meta #protect danny rand 2k17 #conversations with danny rand fans #danny rand defense squad #ferrellcat1122 #iron fist season 2 #iron fist season 1

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browniefox · 6 years

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The Dark And Light Sides Of The Moon 9

Pro No Even’s of @trulymightypotato‘s Royal Expectations

Snow and Gar finally talk it out

Aftermath of learning the truth goes smoother than one may think

oOo

On the bright side, the cut was fairly clean.

Lark’s face was screwed up in pain, sweat spotting his brow. Snow was running his fingers through Lark’s hair, muttering words of comfort. Gar meanwhile did his best to gently pull Lark’s hand off the part of the cut it was covering. It was hard, since by now Lark was doing extra harm as the nails started to pierce his skin.

“Lark, Larkspur, I need you to let go,” Gar knew Lark probably wasn’t paying attention. It was probably the kid’s first real injury that approached anything close to serious. Still, he managed to get not-his son’s hand off the cut and put his own hand over it. Carefully he eased his own magic over the slice, encouraging the flesh to knit back together, closing up at if it had never been opened in the first place, healing over without a mark.

“Lark, bird, you’re okay,” Snow comforted as Lark’s eyes darted over. He may be healed, but the echoes of the pain didn’t fade quite as quickly. Lark moaned and slowly sat up, rubbing his now-healed arm.

“Thanks dad.” Gar stopped breathing at the word. He didn’t deserve this. It wasn’t his to have.

“... you should get some rest.” Gar got up and pushed his way through the crowded grounds.

He should’ve just stayed in his room. Kept away from everybody until they figured out what was going on.

“Garuku,” Gar stopped at Violetscale’s voice. They were staring at him with those long-dead eyes that cut deeply into Gar. “You do know you’ve done nothing wrong.”

Gar didn’t respond to that, simply turned back around and continued on his way. People from the inside smiled at him, waved to him, believing they knew him. Not realizing he was just an imposter. He went back to a room that wasn’t his, sat down on the bed of a stranger, and pulled the medallion out from under his shirt.

At least back at home, he knew where he belonged.

*knock knock knock*

Gar didn’t respond, hoping whoever it was would leave. They didn’t though. The door creaked open and the person Gar wanted to see the least came in. Snow stood awkwardly in the doorway for a moment.

“Thank you for healing Lark.” Snow said after a long moment.

“I just did what any decent person would do.” Gar shrugged off the compliment. Snow didn’t leave though, if anything he came farther in. And farther in. In fact, the door closed and Snow was on the opposite side than Gar wanted him to be on.

He heard Snow draw a deep breath.

“Gar…”

This was it. It had to be. When Snow would finally lay into him about his anger, his disappointment. Gar braced himself for the onslaught of ‘stay out of this’ and ‘you’re not him’, ‘you should’ve have ever gotten the chance to even glimpse what you missed for your mistakes’. At least he’d already heard it all from himself.

“... I’m sorry I failed you.”

Wait what.

Gar finally looked over as Snow, whose face was overflowing with guilt.

“You became a-a demon and were forced to kill, ruined the magic of the Changing Lands when it was the last choice you had, lived longer than anybody should be forced to. And you still managed to turn things around, save the Realms, and where the ever-loving Fuck was I?!” Rage replace the guilt as Snow stared down at the ground, at nothing? “Did, did Soulstealer get me there too? Was I just some useless puppet? Did I die without the death even being able to help my Royal? You must-” Snow swallowed, afraid of the words in his own mouth. “You must hate me?”

“Hate you?” Gar stood up. “Snow, I, what… Snow, I don’t hate you.”

“Then why can’t you stand to look at me?!” Snow shouted, taking a step forward. “Why do you seem like you’re avoiding me?”

“Because YOU hate ME!” Gar shouted back. “I’M the reason L- Lo- Lozul is gone, I’M the reason those kids don’t have their father here, I’M the reason my world was so ruined for years! I shouldn’t be here, I shouldn’t be ruining this more than I already have!”

“I. DON’T. HATE. YOU.” Snow stepped forward enough to grab Gar’s shoulders. They were finally looking each other in the eyes. “I… I’m proud that managed to do what you did. That you held in there… without me.”

“You didn’t die. I tried to save you but I messed up. But you were able to save my daughter, take her to the guardians, keep her safe. You’re the reason I’m human and alive now.”

And they stared at each other. The words shouted bounced around for a long while, and with them a weight felt like it was lifted off of Gar’s shoulder.

“I will find a way to get you home.” Snow promised.

“SNOW, SNOW, SNOW, SNOW,”

A crescendoing shouting drew the two Protector’s attentions, and Snow opened the door, looking out into the hallway.

“Yes?”

“SNOW! Snow, there’s-”

“He looks just like Lo-”

“-alking style was we-

“-ust sort of nodded to me, which only-”

“-estroy the Kingdom!”

“Piya, Crumpler, I can’t understand I word you’re saying.” Two soldiers skidded to a stop before Snow, moments away from bowling him over. Gar perked up at the familiar names.

“Snow, there’s an imposter Lozul walking around.”

“Is there really?” Snow raised an amused eyebrow.

“Oh definitely. I don’t think he knows we’re onto him yet though.”

“Does he look something like this?” Snow waved Gar over, a mischevious grin on his face.

“Hoi!”

“Demon!” One of the guys - he sadly had no idea whether it was Piya or Crumpler - slapped him.

“Crumpler, it’s alright.” Snow tried placate the upset man. “Everything’s okay.”

“Then who the hell is that?” Piya pointed at Gar, hand on the hilt of his sword.

“Just an old friend.”

“This is some magic stuff going on, isn’t it?” Crumpler squinted at Snow, then looked at Gar.

“You got us.” Snow held up his hands in surrender. Crumpler sighed dramatically.

“You two make it so hard to do a good job.”

“At least it’s not as bad as when we were younger.” Snow chuckled.

“When we were younger, we had less to lose.” Piya pointed out. “Now there’s kids to think about, and a definite future instead of just a Hopefully There Is One.”

“Those were the days.” Snow sounded almost wistful. It was easy to romanticize times you’d already lived through.

“Snow!”

Snow sighed and shook his head lightly at the familiar voice. Gar looked down the hall, opposite the way Piya and Crumpler had come, to see Agora.

Limping.

“Agora!” Gar shouted and rand down to them. The young protector looked up at Gar with wide, terrified eyes. They leg was bleeding, as was a slice on their stomach, and their eyes was steadily bruising. “Agora what happened?”

“Edel’s been taken.”

oOo

Despite Snow’s continual reassurance, Lozul didn’t trust Gar.

He just had a thing against a demon - ex or current - being so close to his family.

But, frankly, there was nothing he could do about it. Which was the worst part.

“Lozul, are you ready for today’s meetings?”

Lozul jumped as Molly entered, already dressed for the day. Lozul sighed and put the wolf helmet back over his head.

“I supposed I am.”

Oh, it’s the meeting time of year? Snow floated into view. I haven’t seen those troublemakers in a while.

Molly jumped upon seeing the shade.

“Don’t worry, it’s just my old protector, Snow.”

“How… did you get here?” The queen asked, watching the shade.

Bluescale brought me. Lozul needed an explanation.

“So, then, you know about Gar?” She bit her lip nervously.

“I don’t blame you for keeping it from me.” Lozul quickly said. “But yes, I do know now.”

“I’m sorry, I-I was just trying to do what I thought was best.”

“What’s done is done. Let’s not be late to the meeting.”

The rest of the Nobles were in there. A few had some unsettling grins on their faces. Phil was missing from the beginning. Molly took her place next to Wade, quickly scribbling something on a piece of parchment and pushing it over to her husband. Lozul’s eyes tracked the clump of shadows that was Snow as his deceased protector slipped under the table.

“Good. I was worried about this being dull.” Bluescale was standing against the wall, watching the group with a small, proud smile.

Lozul had to admit, he’d been surprised how… professional everybody was being. Sure, a lot of them were asleep or not paying attention by the end of the day, but nothing completely wild had happened. Perhaps it was because there were so few. When you had 98+ people in a room, there was constantly people getting away with things. Getting away with, as in before things just inevitably devolved into complete and utter chaos.

King Wade started to on about the financial state of the kingdom and and Lozul let himself get distracted by the shadow on the other side of the room creeping up near Protector Kjellberg.

“Snow?” The whisper caught him off guard, and he turned to see Amile also watching Snow’s journey to Felix.

“Is it a bit cold in here?” Felix asked, shivering.

“Oh, must be me.” Bluescale replied and winked at Lozul.

“Hey, what was that wink abo- AARGH!” Felix slammed his head back into the wall in a desperate effort to get as far away from the sudden chilling mass of darkness in front of him.

I’M THE GHOST OF PROTECTORS PAST, HERE TO RETURN YOU TO THE GRAVE WHERE YOU BELONG, Snow bellowed.

“Snow!” JP jumped up, staring at the darkness. “But I thought you were gone.”

I’m just here for a quick spookening. Snow floated to the center of the room.

“Please tell me you’re not actually going to re-kill me.” Felix pleaded, still pressed up against the wall to be as far from the shade as possible.

Don’t worry, it takes too much effort. I’m just here to… chill, for a bit. Carry on please.

He then proceeded to be the biggest distraction of the morning, floating through people, messing with notes, and generally being a nuisance. But it was pretty clear nobody was really focused today anyway. Not much progress was done that morning, and eventually Bluescale left early, apparently not being able to stand statistic for much longer. Not that Lozul blamed her in the slightest. If he wasn’t obligated as a ‘Protector’, he’d be doing something else too.

It was a relief when it the break for lunch came, and everybody basically ran down the dining hall. The first one through the door was the very unfortunate PJ. The second he stepped into the room, a vine whipped down from the ceiling, wrapped around his foot, and returned from whence it came.

“Oh hey PJ, nice to see you hanging around.” Phil’s voice could be heard from the dining hall.

“Great. It’s begun.” Wade stepped to the front of the group, drawing his sword. Dan cursed.

“I should’ve known by how Phil didn’t even try to come to the meetings. I guess I didn’t think he’d be up to doing something on this caliber. JP, where’s your wife when we need her?”

“Stick close to me.” Cry instructed, going up next to Wade. “We can make it through this.” Some lightning crackled around them like a force field. Half of the group stayed outside of the hall, cheering them on. The vines did try to grab them but jerked back upon getting zapped.

“Nice job Cry!” Jess cheered. “Let’s go get some lunch.”

And that was when Cry slipped.

The break in concentration was enough time for the vines to go down and pluck Jess, her Protector, Static, and Wade up to the ceiling. Lozul managed to freeze the two that tried to grab Molly and himself, and Cry started the electric field just in time to avoid the same fate as everybody else coming to Felix, Dan, and him.

“You might want to watch your step.”

Lozul looked up to see Bluescale and Greenscale lounging in vine-swings, Phil grinning down at them.

“PHILLY I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!” Dan shouted upwards.

“We’ve got to keep moving Dan.” Cry said, shuffling forward unsteadily on the ice. “The others are counting on us.”

“Oh he’s going to have it coming to him tonight.” Dan muttered.

Lozul couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled in his chest.

This was just starting to almost feel like home.

#browniefox writes #moon au #royal expectations #garuku bluemoon #pro no evens

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aleatoryalarmalligator · 7 years

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Life Story Part 51

It was the first day of school at the Paradise Creek Regional Alternative School, and I walked into a room full of people I had never met. There was never more than three classes going on at any one time, and often times there was only one real core class of about 20-30 students. Last hour did bring about fifteen more students who spent their days at the regular high school, and would drop into the alternative school to get extra credits. We didn't get passed around through seven classes as day like we did at the public school, there were only three – each class being two hours long. And the building was quite small. It felt weird being in this classroom. Even though I had planned to be in a new school for the last year, it was hard to fathom how I got to that place.

What I had been hoping, and what I had soon learned to be incorrect, was that the alternative school would be very lax about what they expected of you and I wouldn't have to try or anything, since I hadn't truly tried in school for years – even when I brought my grades up, it wasn't with much enthusiasm or interest in doing a good job. It seemed to me early on that this might have been the case, after all, there was no homework, and they weren't overly concerned with what you ate, or wore or when you went to the bathroom so long as you weren't obscene about it. But what I soon learned, was that this school actually expected a lot.

Our primary teacher was named Mike. Mike was married to the counselor of the school, Jenni. When he introduced himself to the class, it was very hard for me to believe he was a teacher. For one thing, he had hair down to his back, neatly put into a ponytail – but still much longer than I had ever seen any other teacher have. Had he walked into the school down in Kendrick, the teachers and the students alike would have been in complete shock. His standards were also very high, and he was overflowing with passion for knowledge. We weren't going to learn anything from a textbook. Instead, he would have us read articles or small books, and we would discuss this – but most of this knowledge resided freshly in his mind. He was very formal – and not so formal at the same time. Nothing weirded him out, but he didn't seem to falter very easily in conversation. And he didn't dismiss anyone. I guess I had been so used to being dismissed in school that it took me by shock that he expected answers from me, and for me to turn in papers at the end of class just like he expected it of everyone else. He didn't pretend that anyone wasn't there, nor did he make strong attempts at shaming or belittling anyone. He was very similar to the writer John Green in some ways.

This was very difficult for me to take. It should have been completely expected on my part, but I was overall stunned to find that he actually wanted everyone, me included (of all people) to participate on the very first day. And what he expected of me was very challenging – at the time at least. He told everyone in the class that we were to write two pages explaining our opinions on 'Do We Believe History is Worthwhile?' And after we wrote it, we were to stand up and read allowed what we had written. This baffled me and caused me to do mental somersaults. Why did he expect me to answer this?? In Kendrick, they had never wanted us to give personal answers to anything. They had discouraged us from asking why, or having us come up with philosophical responses to life. And for all the opinions I upheld and tossed around in conversation at the lunch table, I had never really been challenged to explain why I believed something to be true.

For one, it just wasn't the language of my upbringing. My father was an intelligent person in many respects, but he loathed social issues and questions that pierced the heart of why people do anything. My mother had no discipline of thought whatsoever and only seemed to follow a stream of egotistical and fantastical consciousness that lead nowhere. Both of them did their jobs well, and for them their jobs were all they ever took the time out to learn how to do – not why they did it. They didn't want to look outside of themselves and wonder why they did anything, or within themselves too deeply either. And it wasn't the language of the community I grew up in – it by and large is not the language of the working class even though it definitely should be, or of the school I grew up in – the curriculum, or of my friends and personal relations. So throughout my entire life, even though I had been outside the box in my observations, I had in most ways, been living through a filter, with limitations and assumptions that I never intended or even understood could be challenged. I know that sounds strange, but you would be amazed what dries up and disappears when nobody expects something of you, and perhaps it was challenging and maybe even painful for me to even let myself ask that question in certain parts of my own life.

Just the first two hours were hell. I was angry, and I didn't know why. I wanted to rebel, but there was no reason to. It had always been okay for me to be a bad student in the other school. It was my role, and I had a right to be angry within that role. And I had found a home in that place. It gave me a sense of entitlement to a degree. As long as I was in a position to be in the defensive all the time, I never had to think about making anything better of myself. But nobody was being rude to me in any way. The other students seemed to be either very open minded and somewhat mature for their age, or their lives were plagued by real issues, like being still in school and raising a baby, or living in far more intolerable and abusive circumstances than I could really fathom. Nobody wanted to bring me down. Nobody was kicking my chair, or giving me weird looks. It was strange, but in my observations, I felt like without realizing it, I had grown to expect a mild bit of hostility from people. I welcomed it. I hadn't egged it on or anything, but when nobody seemed to be reacting to me, it was hard for me to know who to be. I was frustrated that someone would even ask me a question like this. I couldn't explain why. I was just angry, and internally combusting as I stared down at a blank page.

I also had/'have enormous public speaking anxiety, and the very act of standing up in front of these people – on my first day especially was beyond mortifying. I had been decent when I understood my place with everyone in the smaller school. I had always been very anxious about standing up and speaking, but it was so much easier to do when I knew I was the one that was meant to ruffle feathers. Here, everyone looked at me like they wanted to know what I had to say, or were perhaps bored, but didn't have anything against me. That was hard. I realize that I had somehow formed a really messed up ego around the identity that I had become. As much as I craved change, I didn't feel like I had any control over anyone, and that made me want to revert. I ended up writing something. I wrote that history was not worthy of study. I knew that the cliché answer from most people would be that it was of course worthy of study, in order to not repeat the mistakes of the past and such. I also had always found memorizing dates and names to be arduous and boring. I was also very Ayn Rand during that time. This isn't to say that Ayn Rand didn't believe in studying history (she probably did but I am not going to fact check it). I had never read her, but much of her beliefs and ideas where things that I believed in a foggier way back in those days. I feel like I understand her – even though I now disagree with just about everything she stands for.

I know myself well enough now to know that I was responding to my abuse in a certain way. It is easier to believe that everything is fit for the fittest, might makes right, you have to crack some eggs if you want to make an omelet. Very capitalistic. You don't question – you do – and the merit of what you do will come back to you in the form of the currency of satisfaction and pleasure. You place your will upon the world around you, and if it is strong enough the world will bend to you. There is no room for weakness. Weakness gets beaten out of you, or you die. And it is a death you deserve, because there is only power, and being weak is the absence of power.

History seemed empty to me at that moment because it didn't have anything to do with me. I felt like it was a way for the collective consciousness to pity itself. It was society eating itself. You live in the now, and the now is all there is, or ever will be. All you have is an arrow in hand, and you shoot your enemies and you don't look back. You strive for the future, and looking in your rear view mirror was a waste of time. What I wrote was something something far less written than even that set of phrases. And I was the only one in the class that held those views.

It took me forever to write that out. I was nervous. I kept looking at Sarah, subconsciously hoping she would save me from the situation. Sarah wrote something that said that history was both not worth studying, and worthy of study. She didn't want to take a side. My nervousness caused me to start talking and making myself somewhat of a distraction. Mike actually had to tell me to be quiet. He rarely would stand above anyone during class, and instead would stoop down to talk to you. And he never sat, because it was painful. He was a fan of extreme ski boarding in the winters and he had had a few accidents on the slopes that had caused him to damage his nerves and be in a lot of pain. So he looked mildly fit and athletic, but he was in fact, stiff as a board for the most part. Nonetheless, he would stoop down to talk to all the students at face level. It was kind of unnerving. It was psychologically off putting. I felt like he was taking power away from me being doing that. And for that situation, I actually made Mike have to almost separate Sarah and I to keep me quiet. It was dumb, but I was responding so nervously, I had this need to rebel against what people told me to do, no matter how reasonable, and I didn't seem to know myself well enough to know why.

I eventually went up and read my essay, it was hard, if not impossible for me to look at the other students in the class. I had no reason to hate any of them. Hating people had always made it easier, but there was no reason for that here. They seemed to abide by some higher order in this room, and I felt like an outside to it. If anything, I was the one that was actually the jerk. I need the dysfunction in order to function. I was judging them and responding more erratically to their basic act of respect – just sitting there and listening. Throughout the speech, I was so nervous, and psychologically in a state of chaos, I actually started laughing at what I had written – as I was used to other people laughing at me. But nobody laughed with me, and I felt like a deranged lunatic with an enormous and yet fragile ego.

Lunch was a full hour and twenty minutes. It was very nice by comparison to the stuffy lunch rooms of my youth with the angrily hostile diseased looks on their face as they piled slop onto your trays. You could just sit at the computers and check your email or do whatever. Or you could leave class altogether and go to a restaurant. There was no lunch room per say, but rather just a kitchen. And everyday the school made coffee cake, and everyone could have some. There was also bagels, yogurt, and a number of other foods that we could all take if we were feeling peckish. I was still very heavily on a diet, but it was nearly impossible for me to resist the coffee cakes after awhile.

I was also very anxious throughout the day because I didn't feel like I was getting adequate exercise just sitting in the desks all day. So I began taking more diet pills. By the last hour, I ended up realizing that I had taken too many. My heart and thoughts were racing and it hurt to keep still. What's more, I had taken one of my pills in the bathrooms without any water to wash it down. I hadn't realized it fully, but the pill had actually gotten trapped inside of my throat. Slowly, the gel melted away, but as soon as that happened the dust within the capsule would be released. So as I was sitting at the desk, next to this big dark haired guy named Matthew, I ended up coughing and dust started flying out of my mouth. It was pretty embarrassing. Matthew looked at me sort of frightened. I imagine what I had coughed had looked like a billow of smoke.

And then there was this boy named Lyndon that we ended up talking to quite a bit at first. Moscow was a much different place than either Lewiston or any of the small surrounding places. As such, there were small countercultures in Moscow that you wouldn't generally find anywhere else. Famously, one of these countercultures was this extreme group of nerdy young men mostly – there might have been a small handful of girls in the group. These extreme nerd factions were further divided between if each one was a Pirate or a Ninja. I believe this divide has it's roots in computer hacking, though I have never been fully clear on that and have not bothered to look. Both sides seemed identical to me, personally. For one, most of the outlandish ones kept a very similar look, of wearing a sort of video game style long black jacket that went down to their knees, the more straps and buttons the better. All of them looked like they were trying to be some kind of combination of The Crow and The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. And they were all very obsessed with the same things. Every last one of them was a fan of anime, and all of them seemed teeming with an obsession for hentai in particular. You got the feeling when you were around them that they wanted girls in their age bracket to act like stupid hentai woman-babies, since that was what they truly found attractive. Aside from these, these Ninjas and Pirates would set up game days where they would stay up for five days straight playing the exact same game on different screens. It was almost like an opium den. You would theoretically walk in, and there would be people crashed all over the floors, screens everywhere. Somehow they had hooked their consoles together. I even heard that occasionally they would piss in jars just to avoid having to leave their game even for a moment.

Lyndon came up to us and started talking to us very early on. He looked strange, with his combat boots and black jacket clad in all sorts of useless belts and such. We kind of liked him well enough at first – mainly because he was quite friendly in approaching us, and I was feeling rather alienated, so someone coming up and being friendly was helpful – at least to me. But it soon became clear that he mostly was into Sarah. He wouldn't stop blatantly staring at Sarah's chest. He couldn't even look at her face when she began to speak to him – it was that bad. He almost seemed unashamed of it. We both tried to ignore it at first, thinking perhaps it looked like what it wasn't.

He mostly wanted to brag about his car, his father – who was a preacher, and more than anything his anime knowledge – mostly under shallow interpretation, his love for the band Sonata Arctica, Buckethead, and math rock in general, and his childish identity as a Ninja. He actually seemed years behind the two of us mentally. It felt like talking to a spoiled ten year old with neurotic interests. Nonetheless, we agreed to hang out with him that weekend. I had personally made it a goal of mine to start searching for other people who were like me. And maybe Lyndon wasn't so bad after all? So that weekend we agreed to drive up to Moscow to visit.

That weekend rolled around, and we drove up there. I don't remember much about the first half of the visit, only that it was sort of terrible. He just wanted Sarah on her back, basically. He looked at me annoyed wishing I wasn't there. He acted like an expectant child almost. Early on, we ended up going to visit this friend of his, that he always mentioned named Emery. So we drove to Emery's house – which was kinda weird. So, from what I understood, Emery's parent's were loaded and they couldn't really stand living with Emery as his taste, appearance and personality had been so taken over by video games. So they own this half falling apart antique home up in Moscow, it was an old duplex, and the other half was completely fallen apart. The other half, which you had to get to by traveling over loose boards and broken parts of the ceiling was fine to live in. When we got in there, Emery was sort of unfriendly. He talked coldly, as if he were one of the 'serious' anime guys in a show. But in fact, he was twice as spoiled as Lyndon. They were living a fantasy here together, pretending to be anime characters.

They first tried to make us watch this anime show on this tiny television they had set up. The room smelled of sweaty bachelor, and the sitting arrangement was awkward. It seemed like it was a techno anime show where there was data and such – and school girls of course. I failed to be enthralled by it. After that, Lyndon and Emery mostly just talked to each other. Emery looked at me almost with hostility the whole time. They wanted Sarah, but only as an anime cartoon girl who would strip for them and blush – which Sarah was not. Sarah and I convinced them that we wanted to go to the mall – mostly to get out of this creepy dark building with these two guys who were making us feel kind of sick. It wasn't that I really hated either one of them, but there was just something gross about them.

We went into the mall, and they came with us. Sarah and I started acting more ourselves and going into stores we wanted to go into, and I could tell Emery and Lyndon were annoyed by this. They actually looked embarrassed by us, and wouldn't get anywhere near us. I couldn't help noticing just how decked out Emery was. He was wearing what had to be, hundreds of dollars in fancy belts, boots, coat and hat – all to look like an anime character. He might have even been carrying fake weaponry even.

When we finally made it out of there, neither one of us had had a true chance to talk about what we were thinking. For the good majority of that day, we mostly just kept to ourselves and went along with whatever we were doing. I think perhaps we were both afraid that the other might still think Lyndon was a good guy and didn't want to hurt the other person's feelings. But I just told Sarah that I still felt gross from being in Emery's strange little cave, and she suddenly broke out wholeheartedly in agreement. We both spent the rest of the car ride home explaining and interpreting what we had just done all day and what we had both seen. It was obvious at this point that Lyndon was just in the market to get in Sarah's pants, though it was also painfully clear that he had zero charm and expected girls to simply fall at his feet because he was Lyndon after all, and he didn't even need any game. And Emery was so lost in the world of being an anime guy that there was no hope for him either. Nobody wanted me there – well, except Sarah. And since they probably just saw me as a fat chick – as most teenage boys will, they had been annoyed that I was there – as they thought they deserved some ridiculous stereotype.

So our first attempt to make friends ended up not going that well. Which was fine. For the rest of the year, I suffered Lyndon's existence more or less. He would start talking at you – mostly to brag about anime characters that he thought were cool. He never even tried to explain why they were funny or cool, or who they were. He would talk to you as though you lived inside his head and already agreed with him, and then he'd get this glint of anger and annoyance when people ever told them something about themselves. For Lyndon, everything was about him. He also intentionally ate as loudly as he could. It was a genuine distraction when we sat in the small computer room to write research essays, and he was intentionally eating obnoxiously – because anime characters that he liked ate loudly. He would slurp and smack animatedly. And he would sometimes and quite often get on the computers and watch his anime shows, or read manga, and he would laugh and talk to the screen. 'DON'T DO IT MASATAKA!' or just some anime character's name. We were all trying to study. I grew to dislike Lyndon very much for the remainder of the time I knew him.

Aside from him, there were a few kids in the class, that I remember. There were a lot of these sorts of girls I had never really known in Kendrick. They love smoking weed, they were super honest about everything, and though mostly very good natured, they had anger issues and probation officers. One girl, I remember, actually had gotten into trouble because of road rage. Someone had done something to piss her off while driving, so when they both stopped at a red light, she had gotten out of her vehicle, opened up their vehicle, dragged them out into the intersection and beat them. Another girl that I remember the best was named Kat. She had been there for years. She knew everyone in Moscow. She was extremely chill all the time, and was able to communicate very well. Most of these kids all listened to a lot of Sublime, Phish, and the Grateful Dead, though some of the angrier girls preferred screamo. So overall, there seemed to be about four subcultures I noticed in Moscow, the nerds – subdivided into the Ninjas and Pirates which I already mentioned, the hippie stoner types, who loved the Grateful Dead bears and were mostly pretty nice – though not really interested in challenging themselves, and then there was a large group of Emo-Screamo types who were extremely obsessed with whatever it was that Hot Topic was currently selling. The girls all had enormous crushes on the singer of My Chemical Romance. And then there was a skateboarding subculture that I never really knew much about. I imagine it was like the skateboarders of any town.

Aside from Mike and Jenni running things, they had support aids – who would be there to help handle the more full classes. Andre was the one I remember better than any of them, and it was just him and Mary Kay early on. Andre was very different from anyone I had ever met. He was black, and from the south and didn't care what anyone thought of him. Most of the students hated his guts because he at times would become neurotically unhappy and be very cold to most of the students. He had worked at the school years previously, becoming a very close friend to Mike at one point – and in those days I heard stories that he was very friendly and warm towards people. And then he had gone to fight in Afghanistan. When he came back he wasn't the same. And it caused him to not really be able to do certain elements of his job properly. People were frightened to ask him for any sort of assistance.

He did like Sarah and I though. Mostly because we weren't afraid of him. I think some of the fear people had of Andre was because of his skin color, but some of it too was because he yelled a lot. But what we realized was that if Sarah and I both just continued to bravely talk to him rather than act frightened, he was actually a very nice. He cared a lot in some ways, possibly too much. He was the aid for the first and part of the second semesters and then one day, Mike told us that Andre had resigned. I guess they had had a falling out – the two of them. There was a girl in our class who was doing a lot of meth. Mike actually worried about this stuff a lot, and so did Andre. Everyone in this school cared more about the well being of the students than I even imagined any teacher ever actually did. They seemed to be constantly trying to find ways to untap each student's potential like a puzzle in their personality. It became a very psychological thing.

Mike however, had walls. He wouldn't quite allow himself to be really close to the students. Which was confusing because the very nature of his job was to try to reach us, and in so doing he had to be highly professional. Mike could have been a psychologist. But he still had walls. And this one girl doing meth, he didn't feel like he could help her after awhile. He would speak to her, and try to ask her challenging questions about herself, and she would just make up excuses in response. So Mike let go of trying to help her. Andre felt this was wrong to give up on any student, and he felt that Mike's approach to distancing himself from his students was amoral. So the two ended up fighting, and in the end Andre marched out. Nobody missed him but Sarah and I – and there was some reason for that. Him yelling at the students was really unprofessional and in bad keeping with the way the school operated. And some of these students had done nothing wrong. He was fun to talk to for Sarah and I however. We would crack a lot of jokes back and forth. I never really knew him though – only that he loved his young daughter a lot, and that he had his name professionally threaded into his shoes.

The other aid was named Mary Kae, and she in many ways was a silent optimist in every situation. She seemed like a boring happy housewife in many respects, except nothing seemed to shock her or make her flinch. Students would try to make her angry and nothing could. I didn't get to know Mary Kae all that well, but there wasn't that much to know. To anyone at the school, she was more or less and open book and the thing about her that were private seemed incredibly normal overall.

With the hours kept by the new school, I was rarely home to see my father ever. Half the time, and in some cases, almost all the time, I just spent the night at Sarah's and we would get up in the morning together and leave together for school again. By the time we got out, it was six in the afternoon, and we would drive back to Kendrick, eat dinner together and then draw and talk or get into an argument that would dissolve in misery and tears early in the morning, before falling to sleep – getting up and doing it again. I saw my dad maybe four hours a week. Another thing too, was that my older half sister Maria had come back from Florida for the second time, and she had been in a miserable place and had eventually called my father and asked if she could stay in his house with her now four children – Jasmine, Ian, Chantelle and baby JT. I think partially because of my absence, my father said yes. Maria could be the babysitter while I was off at school. She would fill in for me. So during this time, I didn't even need to babysit. It was almost like I wasn't entirely a part of the family unit anymore. And I had never understood what that would be like, but I ended up thriving because of it. It was the first time in my life that I felt like I could actually grow as a person – and there was no family members to bring me down or hurt me. I was away from the repetitive working class lifestyle. I didn't have to worry about my father, because he wasn't there – and he didn't even see me enough to be upset. And after a few months, his angry negative voice that I carried around with me began to fade.

With the family thing all sorted out temporarily in my life and the stress, worry and self monitoring related to that, I was actually able to face myself in a way I had never had a chance to. In many respects, I was sort of radicalized during this year. I thought more about ideas for ideas sake rather than what these ideas meant to me personally. I practiced a lot of abstract thinking. The whole world didn't just start seeming a whole lot bigger to me, it also seemed a whole lot deeper. I learned that you could take just about anything you saw in daily life an analyze it and realize all the connections there were in the world and to yourself. I was able to form a much more in depth aspect to my character than had consciously been there before. Going up to school in Moscow was probably the best decision I ever made.

About a week after I had started school, I was waiting for Sarah to come pick me up from my house, when my father received a phone call. I could hear him weeping and having troubles breathing. My first thoughts were that perhaps his mother had passed away. Grandma Betty was still alive at this point, but she was getting rather old. I had seen her a year before at the family reunion and she had seemed very happy to see everyone, but didn't at times seem that grounded of what was going on. She also had always been a heavy chainsmoker and it was only a matter of time really before that caught up with her.

I was too afraid to see my father crying, so I continued to sit out on the front ledge of the house and pretend that I hadn't heard. I knew I would find out any second anyway, and though many people like to be comforted immediately after something traumatic, nearly as many others would prefer time to compose themselves before facing the rest of the world. My father came out and in a sob explained to me that Patti, his recently exed girlfriend – the one he was doing the Hottest Men of the Lewis-Clark Calendar 2006 for, had just killed herself. She had come home from the bar, having most likely been dumped by the twenty year old man she was pursuing. Being that she had just turned fifty, she felt ugly and used. She was starving herself terribly, her daughters seemed to hate her (and everything really). And so she got on her car, and hooked up a hose to the exhaust and had suffocated herself. Her best friend found her body three days later.

I can't say that my father has ever been the same after that. I think a lot of things effected him negatively in his life – the death of my baby brother William, the divorces, his breakup with Jody. But something dragged him closer to death when Patti died that way. And there was something less comforting, and more off about him forever after. He had been hoping to win her back in some way. He was still very much in love with her. He made a lot of phone calls after that, even talking to her ex husband that she had had her daughters with. The ex husband had expected Patti to do something like this, but he was rather cold about it in many regards. As were her children, though no one had anything to say that she had done that was particularly evil. She had been vein about herself, and willing to drop everything she did on a dime to attach herself to very young men. And this had made her a joke to them at her age. She had been passed around and humiliated. She had been obsessed with beauty and the thought of getting older was something she could not handle. But none of these things were criminal or evil, and her family for the most part made it seem that they had been. Perhaps it was their own upper class way of handling Patti and the ultimate stain of killing herself and what that meant for her daughters. She had been destroyed by her obsession with being perfect. And she had always been alone. She had been alone as teenager with no friends taking care of her dying religious mother. She had been alone with all of her relationships. And I think that kind of aloneness took her down as well.

After grieving for a few weeks, my father instantly went into this different mode and became obsessed with buying large amplifiers and speakers. Over the next few years, it became ridiculous. He kept buying PA speakers and filling the house with them. So everywhere you went in the house, there were either speakers, or speaker boxes with wires and soddering tools for building them. He got rid of furniture so he could fill the house with speakers. And these speakers ended up taking the place of tables and sometimes even chairs when it was a real sturdy one. And all he wanted to do was talk about speakers. He ended up calling people in the speaker companies and talking to representatives and help lines for the company, even going so far as to knowing these people personally, mostly because they also loved speakers. He started hanging out with anyone who played music, just in hopes that they would also enjoy talking about his speakers. And the weird thing is, he rarely ever actually hooked them up. It was always a project. He might turn something on to see how it performed, but there was never any real need for all these speakers. I don't know what this all meant in his underlying psyche, but I venture to guess that in some deep psychological way, he hoped that the sheer mass of volume could drown away his hopelessness and misery. Because aside from me, he never had much of an opportunity to sort through any of his feelings. If anyone knew what he was going through, it was me.

Three nights after Patti killed herself there was a strange night at the Sanborn household. I woke up from a nightmare. The nightmare wasn't about anything realistic in particular. I just dreamed that I was a little girl, a different child and I was walking in the woods with my brother, but there was something sick in the woods around us and we had to keep walking through these woods. It was hard to explain the sick feeling, but it made me think of flies on dead bodies. But it seemed very much alive and out to get us. The dream spiraled off into this general sense of strange dread, before I finally woke myself up. At the very same time that I woke up, I could hear my sister Allison screaming in the room down the hall. She had also just woken up from a nightmare. In her nightmare a vampire had been under the bed and it was trying to grab her feet. In her dream she had thought she was awake. And then she saw it floating up on the ceiling, and somehow she had woken herself up with her own screaming. And then my father had also just awakened from a nightmare. In his nightmare, someone had been standing in his bedroom, but he couldn't tell who it was. The person had kept saying his name over and over, but he had been paralyzed until Allison had screamed and he had woken up as well. None of us were the type to typically have nightmares – especially me – at least I don't remember them if I do have them. The only person who hadn't had a nightmare had been David, who was still fast asleep even though him and Allison shared a room.

My father and I contemplated about what that could possibly mean the next day. It was strange, because my father had always been very anti anything related to the supernatural. I had been fond of the supernatural, but I had never been able to really talk to him about it because he didn't understand or really seem to want to hear about it. But we couldn't help but wonder if this had somehow been related to Patti in some way. My father has silently maintained in his heart that in some way, this had been Patti's way of saying goodbye to him.

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neuxue · 7 years

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Wheel of Time liveblogging: The Gathering Storm ch 16

In which Elaida loses the plot and Egwene bleeds for the cause

Chapter 16: In the White Tower

There’s a part of me that wants to just go back and reread last chapter several hundred times, as if the first time didn’t destroy me already, but I shall press onwards!

Plus, this opens with Egwene, which is always good.

“Tell me, Egwene al’Vere, how would you have handled the situation?”

Better.

Oh, sorry, what was the question?

Egwene is cracking walnuts. Because sure. And she doesn’t get a seat with a view out the window, but honestly of the Aes Sedai in the Tower she’s not the one who needs a broader perspective, all things considered. Besides, the Tower itself is her focus right now.

The White barely frowned at Egwene’s improper response. They were all growing accustomed to the fact that this “novice” seldom acted her presumed station.

Well, then they’re ready to be pushed a bit more. If they can accustom themselves to her not acting like a novice, it’s only a short step to them accepting that she isn’t a novice. Now she needs to get them to make the rather large leap from ‘anomaly’ to ‘Amyrlin seat’.

“I asked,” Ferane said coolly, “what you would have done in the Amyrlin’s place. Consider this part of your instruction.You know that the Dragon has been reborn and you know that the Tower must control him in order for the Last Battle to proceed. How would you handle him?”

That’s a lot of assumptions in there, not least of which is that he must be controlled. Consider, instead, ‘aided’?

And which Amyrlin’s place are we talking about here? Elaida’s? Not difficult to do better than she has done. Siuan’s? That’s rather more complicated, because maybe she didn’t handle it perfectly but she also handled it about as well as she could have; she and Moiraine didn’t even know where Rand was until EotW, and their plan at that point seemed reasonable enough, give or take, but then shit hit about a thousand fans at once and, well, here we are.

So I suppose the other assumption implicit in that question is that the Tower would listen to and cooperate with an Amyrlin who claimed the Dragon had been reborn. ‘How do you handle him’? More like ‘How do you handle a Tower that has spent centuries becoming more and more insular and arrogant, and is riddled with Black Ajah?’

Because did Siuan and Moiraine handle everything perfectly? Probably not. But considering that their resources were pretty much limited to each other, and they didn’t know who else they could trust, and they had almost nothing to go on, I’d say they made a decent run of it. They were both able to adapt to a certain degree when necessary, and even early on realised that they weren’t going to be able to just tell Rand what to do and have him do it. There was a bit more of a learning process after that, and Moiraine got more of it than Siuan, but Siuan was undone not so much by the Dragon Reborn or by her efforts as by…the Tower.

Some of that’s on her, but a lot of it is on the Tower itself, and a lot of it would probably have happened regardless of what the original plan was. Telling people that the prophecies they’ve been fearing are actually going to happen now, and that a man who can channel needs to be allowed to do his thing, and that also the world is ending…that’s a really good way to get yourself deposed, no matter how right you are or how careful you are about it. People don’t like having their worldview fucked with. Especially if their worldview is largely built on a foundational sense of superiority and aloof disinterest in worldly affairs except those they’re directly manipulating. All in all, it’s easier to lay the blame on a scapegoat than to accept a harsh reality. Because then you can go ‘see, we dealt with the problem, we got rid of the person who was making it all bad, and now everything will be fine’ and not actually have to change anything. Denial and power make for a spectacularly terrible combination.

But sure, Ferane, let’s assume that your question exists in a vacuum and that all elements obey the ideal gas Tower laws.

It does seem like Ferane is referring more to Elaida’s position. But then…Elaida took over after Rand was already proclaimed as the Dragon Reborn and had taken Callandor, so…fine. But then Egwene’s answer would be I WOULDN’T FUCKING DEPOSE THE CURRENT AMYRLIN ON RIDICULOUS CHARGES.

Okay, okay, fine.

“First, I would send a group of sisters to his home village.”

Ferane raised an eyebrow. “To intimidate his family?”

“Of course not,” Egwene said. “To interrogate them.”

Egwene, you’ve met Tam al’Thor, right?

Still, especially in her follow-up she makes a good point. Part of the issue for a long time has been that people don’t see Rand al’Thor the human being, they see the Kinslayer, the Dragon Reborn, the saviour and destroyer.

Learning where he came from and talking to people who knew him would give them information about his character, sure. But it would also force them to see him more as a person, and that more than anything would have helped quite a bit in terms of getting through to him, and working with him. If he had been approached as a man (as a boy, uncertain and well-meaning and powerful and lost) things might have gone rather differently. Instead he was caged and beaten and learned never to trust, because all anyone wanted was to contain and control him.

Even the notion of ‘controlling’ him might have been approached differently, if the Aes Sedai in general saw him as…a shepherd named Rand al’Thor. Because he absolutely did need guidance, especially early on. He meant well, but he had exactly no fucking clue what he was doing. And the Tower could have been in a position to offer genuine guidance, given that they are in theory the ones with the knowledge and ability to do so.

Moiraine tried. She wasn’t perfect, but she did try, and for all that she could be ruthlessly pragmatic in her outlook and her determination to do what was necessary, I think she did see him as a person. (You will do well). But she was only one Aes Sedai, he was still wary of her and of Siuan and of being manipulated, and then Elaida happened, and then Elaida happened again, and…yeah. The Tower overall has focused far too much on controlling the Dragon Reborn and not nearly enough on helping Rand al’Thor.

So…yeah. Making an effort to actually learn about him might have helped in more ways than they realise.

“But you already know him,” Tesan piped in.

“I do,” Egwene said, cracking the walnut. “But we were speaking of a hypothetical situation.” Best you remember that in the real world, I know the Dragon Reborn personally. As nobody else in this Tower does.

True, but she has also recognised that she doesn’t know the Dragon Reborn nearly as well as she once knew Rand. Yet knowing Rand may end up being the more important of the two, because again, it means she may still be able to regard him and speak with him as a person rather than a figure out of legend.

“More importantly, I’d know him to be a good man at heart.”

And that’s exactly it, really; that’s what the rest of the Tower and so many other people forget, or fail to realise. So they don’t work with him as someone who is desperately trying to do the right thing, but instead they deal with him as…a force to be dealt with. And so he responds in kind, because the tone has already been set.

“And so, my next step would be to send sisters to him to offer guidance.”

“And if he rejected them?” Ferane asked.

“Then I’d send spies,” Egwene said, “and watch to see if he has changed from the man I once knew.”

Harsh, but…as a backup option it makes sense. The real key is in first sending sisters to offer guidance. To approach him in good faith as an ally and as a person who wants to help, and to offer to help him in turn. What a radical idea, right?

And if it were a genuine offer made in good faith and he refused…yeah, okay, keep an eye on him. But make that offer first, and actually make the offer, rather than approaching him in arrogance and presumption.

“And while you waited and spied, he would terrorise the countryside, wreaking havoc and bringing armies to his banner.”

“And is that not what we want him to do?” Egwene asked. “I don’t believe he could have been prevented from taking Callandor, should we have wanted him to be. He has managed to restore order to Cairhien, unite Tear and Illian beneath one ruler, and presumably has gained the favour of Andor as well.”

Yeah, Egwene gets it – far better than the others, at any rate. Yes, letting him act freely means that some of this will happen…but it needs to happen.

So it comes back to denial. The Aes Sedai know the prophecies, and accept now that the Dragon has been reborn, but too many of them, I think, don’t fully accept what that actually means. Because that would mean relinquishing a certain degree of control. And also yes, it would mean watching chaos and war unfold in places, and letting that happen, and that’s not an easy position to take.

As Moiraine might point out, though, they need to remember how to control saidar. And that’s not to say that they should be controlling Rand, but they could certainly have been in a position to work alongside him and help the rest of the world deal with everythign that’s happening.

“It seems,” Ferane said, “that you would simply let him sow chaos as he saw fit.”

“Rand al’Thor is like a river,” Egwene said. “Calm and placid when not agitated, but a furious and deadly current when squeezed too tightly.”

Saidar, essentially. And there’s a nuance to the whole idea of ‘control’ that most of them seem to be missing. By trying to force things, the Tower has ended up caught in the chaos itself, thereby actually losing control. Instead, they need to be able to accept and adapt to and work with the actual situation, and part of that means accepting that, while they have a role to play, they are not the sole power or authority here and they can’t just force their will on everyone else. Accept that the prophecies do need to be fulfilled, and that it might mean apparent chaos, and it probably won’t be easy, but let it happen and work with and around that. Guide those who need guidance, help smooth some of the transitions, support where necessary, stand not as a brittle entity clinging to any semblance of power but as an actual point of strength and stability. So again, something along the lines of surrender in order to control.

“Acting without information is lunacy”

Tell that to your boyfriend.

Actually, tell that to everyone. Of course, it’s impossible to know everything, and it’s been something of a theme within the series that people do the best they can with the information they have, but some could definitely try at least a little harder to understand the situation first. *stares pointedly at the Tower* *stares pointedly at Gawyn* *stares pointedly at half the cast of characters*

There was a time for logic, true, but there was also a time for emotion.

If you say so.

He had changed from the man she had known. And yet the seeds of personality within him must be the same.

I like that she takes this angle on it; she knows that he has changed, and she acknowledges that she doesn’t know him as well as she once did. She also accepts that she has changed, as well. But despite that, she is still able to think of him as Rand, as the boy she knew. And is able and willing to believe that, despite all the changes, he is still Rand.

It wasn’t that he had suddenly developed a temper; it was simply that nothing in the Two Rivers had upset him.

It’s an interesting perspective, and one I rather like from her because it means she’s looking at him as Rand-under-different-circumstances, or Rand-as-Dragon, rather than just as this violent terrifying figure the others see. She’s willing and able to believe that his core personality is still there, and specifically that the good parts of him are still there, that he’s still a good person at heart.

During the months she’d travelled with him, he’d seemed to harden with each step. He was under extraordinary pressures.

Again, it’s something that too few people have been able to understand or acknowledge. And Egwene’s not perfect about it either – she sometimes thinks the worst of him, just as he sometimes thinks the worst of her –but she can keep this kind of thing in mind, and look at him through this lens, and is able to see some of why he has changed the way he has.

How did one deal with such a man? She frankly had no idea.

Points for honesty.

“He views the Blue favourably because of past associations”

Ah, Egwene, how you have changed from the girl who was appalled at Moiraine’s composure upon hearing of Siuan’s supposed death…

“Delegations like this one have failed in the past. I believe that Elaida’s own delegation was led by a Grey.”

“Yes, but Elaida’s delegation was fundamentally flawed,” Egwene said.

“And why is that?”

Would you like that alphabetically, or categorically?

“‘Dealing’ with is different from ‘working’ with,” Egwene said.

Yes, thank you.

“Since when has the White Tower been in the business of kidnapping and forcing people to our will?”

I see your point but also I’m pretty sure the Tower has been in that business for a while, unfortunately. Still, she’s right that it shouldn’t be, and that trying to force everyone to do what they want is stupid and ineffective.

She doesn’t have as much of an issue with subtle manipulation, of course, but depending on the circumstances and given her position I can see where she’s coming from. To some extent, the Tower has – or has had – a certain degree of responsibility in terms of maintaining stability, and sometimes politics is a manipulation game. And her overall point –that ‘dealing’ with is different from ‘working’ with is a very good one; negotiation and guidance and suggestion can sometimes fall into manipulation, sure, but they’re significantly better approaches than brute force or just assuming total control and authority.

“Rand al’Thor is a good man, in his heart, but he needs guidance.”

Pretty much. I think they see it as a sort of black-and-white dichotomy, in which either they control every single thing he does or else he runs rampant and chaos ensues. Really, there’s quite a lot of space in between. He’s had help along the way and could have used more, and could use help now. But that’s very different from people trying to just push him around. Or lock him in a box. He needs to be free to do what needs to be done, and they need to accept that some of that is out of their control, but they should be there to help and provide support and guidance and knowledge. And some extra pairs of hands, because there’s way too much work for just one person.

Sigh.

“He should have been shown the wisdom in listening. Instead, he has been shown that we will treat him like an unruly child.”

Right again. Nothing wrong with listening to good advice, and the Tower should have been worthy of trust, and of being in a position to actually give that advice, but NOPE.

“Unfortunately, we cannot focus on al’Thor right now.”

“He is the greatest problem facing the world,” pinch-faced Tesan said, leaning forward. “We must deal with him first.”

“No,” Egwene said. “There are other issues.”

Like the fact that the Tower is coming apart at the seams. You can’t help anyone else if you can’t even hold yourselves together. Sort it out, and make the Tower worthy of its role again, and able to fulfill that role, and then you can look at how to approach Rand, and how to deal with the rest of the world. Solve your own issues before you try to solve everyone else’s.

So Egwene makes a logical case for why she should continue to claim the Amyrlin Seat, and why the divisions in the Tower need to be addressed stat, and the Whites are like ‘it’s not our fault’ and Egwene is like ‘okay seriously can we all stop acting like children pointing fingers and instead fix something around here’.

“You want to help battle the Dark One? Well, your first step is not to deal with the Dragon Reborn. Your first step should be to reach out to sisters of the other Ajahs.”

In other words, get your shit together.

This is where Egwene being younger and something of an outsider in some ways actually helps her. She can look at it from a somewhat fresh perspective and see the glaring problems that the others have been surrounded by. It’s sometimes harder to see that kind of thing from inside, especially because it often happens gradually or in stages, like boiling a frog. And so much becomes ‘just how it is’ or ‘how it always has been’ or ‘not our fault’ that it’s easy to miss the huge glaring flaws that would be obvious to an external observer.

“I still think that this is work for the Greys,” Tesan said, but she sounded less convinced than she had just moments before. “You should speak with them.” “I have,” Egwene said.

And then she just hits them with a litany of all the conversations she’s had with all the Ajahs, and they’re kind of stunned and it’s kind of excellent. Like, ‘surprise! No one wants to take responsibility and you’re all acting like children! Meanwhile I’ve been actually trying to get shit done in between being beaten and doing chores and cracking walnuts for you, step up your game and get on my level!’

“What, do you think I should simply sit – like most – and do nothing while the Tower crumbles?”

Egwene is, once again, Done. So done. All out of fucks to give.

“Besides, it is my duty.”

Right after they’ve complained that it’s not their fault, not their problem, go ask someone else…she is not even trying to be subtle about putting them to shame.

So finally they’re listening to her, and Egwene has set up a lovely play-date with them and the Yellow Ajah.

“Simple enough,” Miyasi said. “Very little effort required, but excellent potential for gain.”

Very little effort for you, maybe.

“Should you decide to choose the White, Egwene al’Vere,” the woman said, “know that you will find a welcome here. Your logic this day was remarkable for one so young.”

Ha. Of all Ajahs and of none, and they’ve almost all extended her an offer by now. A little on-the-nose, sure, but it works, and I rather like it.

“You will have no further lessons,” Katerine said. “At least, not of the kind you have been receiving. […] What you need to learn, it has been decided, is humility. […] From now on, all you will do Is chores.”

From a victory to a setback. It’s definitely a blow, and she knows it, because it cuts off all her access to other Aes Sedai.

Well, it was feeling like time for something to change. She was finally managing to influence the sisters and Sitters, and some of them were listening to her and coming to respect her and look to her for advice. And when things are starting to go well for a character, you know it’s time for something to come along and fuck it up.

It is a rather clever move from Elaida, especially if the real purpose is in fact to keep her from talking to the Aes Sedai. Because she’s been very effective at that, and Elaida would definitely not want that to continue.

Egwene had changed into a work dress for the duty. While it had once been white, it had been repeatedly used by novices cleaning the fireplaces, and the soot had been ground into the fibres. Patches of grey stained the cloth, like shadows.

No symbolism there, certainly. Once pure white, meant to be pure white, and now stained by shadows? I see what you did there.

Also there’s the fact that she’s literally on her hands and knees doing work, working to scrape the Tower clean, while the others watch and do nothing.

The soot had been baked on for so long that it formed a glossy black patina on the stone. She’d never get it all off. She just needed to make sure it was clean enough that none would break free.

Yeah, again, definitely not at all related to the work she’s doing with Tower itself, nope, not at all about how she may not be able to fix everything but she just needs to get it working well enough that it will stand, and ‘clean’ enough that the Black Ajah won’t destroy everything…

Laras is kind of great as a background-badass character. She sneaks up on Egwene and then leads her silently to a trapdoor and once again she’s ready to help an Amyrlin escape.

She was obviously nervous, the way she kept glancing about and tapping her foot. But she’d obviously also done this sort of thing before. Why was the simple cook in the White Tower so skilled at sneaking, so handy with a plan to get Egwene out of the fortified and besieged city?

Obviously she has a past as a secret agent but decided she preferred making pies.

“I won’t be a party to the breaking of a girl’s spirit,” Laras said sternly.

That’s an admirable sentiment, Laras, but also Egwene is no longer the novice you met a few years ago.

Egwene froze as Katerine, wearing a dress with crimson skirts and yellow trim, spotted her. The Red’s mouth was thin-lipped, her eyes narrow. Had she seen Egwene and Laras walk off?

Laras froze.

“I see now what I was doing wrong,” Egwene quickly said to the Mistress of Kitchens, eyeing a second hearth, which lay near where they had been standing in the pantry. “Thank you for showing it to me. I’ll be more careful now.”

“See that you are,” Laras said, shaking out of her shock. “Otherwise, you’ll see what a real punishment is like”

I enjoy this mostly because it serves as such a lovely contrast to but reminder of the time in TDR when Siuan came into the kitchens to talk with Egwene and Nynaeve about their search for the Black Ajah, and got Laras to take Elayne away to ‘punish’ her for something she didn’t do, and Egwene tried to step in to defend Elayne because she didn’t realise the whole thing was a ploy. It’s a small thing, but it’s an indication of how far she has come and how much things have changed.

Oh wonderful, Egwene gets to wait on Elaida again. This ought to be fun. Make sure someone’s on hand with a mop, just in case the soup happens to…spill…again.

So she’s giving herself a reassuring pep talk, while simultaneously trying to figure out what the hell she’s supposed to do. You’ve got this, Egwene.

She had determined during the walk that she needed to approach Elaida with silence, just as she had last time.

Except I feel like, just like last time, something is going to interfere with that. Still, it’s a good starting point. Calm and determined not to rise to any bait. Good thing she spent all morning with the White Ajah, right?

Ah.

She had assumed she’d attend Elaida alone, or maybe with Meidani. Egwene hadn’t for a moment considered that the dining room would be filled with women. There were five, one from each Ajah save the Red and the Blue. And each woman was a Sitter.

Interesting. And Egwene’s just been essentially cut off from seeing any Aes Sedai at all, so this is probably the best chance she’ll have to…do something. Whatever that may be. She and Elaida are both here, with Sitters looking on, so in that regard she couldn’t have asked for a better opportunity; this way there’s a direct comparison. The problem, of course, is that Egwene has to find a way to show that, and flip it to her advantage, despite currently being in a position of apparent subordination. Silence is an effective tool, but I don’t think it’ll be enough here. She has to make them see her. Specifically, she has to make them see her beside Elaida, and to compare them, and to see her as the true Amyrlin beside a pretender.

Well. Egwene has always been good at dramatic moments, especially in front of the Hall. This isn’t precisely the Hall, but it’s close enough that my money’s on Egwene.

There wasn’t a Red sister at the table other than Elaida. Was that because the Red Sitters were all out of the Tower? Perhaps Elaida thought the room balanced with her there, as she still thought of herself as Red, although she wasn’t supposed to.

Clearly set in contrast to Egwene receiving offers from Ajahs left and right, and reminding them all that the Amyrlin is of all Ajahs and none. Shall we make a compare/contrast column for Egwene and Elaida? Then again, that’s a lot of effort for what basically amounts to Elaida: sucks | Egwene: is awesome.

So why are all these Sitters here? What is Elaida’s game this time?

Doesine nodded to Egwene, almost in respect. It was an indication of something. “I’m here because you said that this sort of thing was important,” it seemed to say.

Well, at least one of them is looking to her, and perhaps comparing her favourably to Elaida. Elaida called them here for some reason, but Doesine may be here as much because of what Egwene asked as because of what Elaida demanded.

Why had Elaida called a dinner of Sitters? Was this an attempt to heal the rifts in the White Tower? Had Egwene misjudged her?

Are pigs flying?

“Ah, good,” Elaida said, noticing Egwene. “You’ve finally arrived. Come here, child.”

Ah. So maybe part of her point here is to force a comparison of her own, but in her favour: to put on a show in front of these Sitters of Egwene obeying her. Because the ones here do seem to be ones who are at least somewhat sympathetic to Egwene, or open to the idea of negotiation with the rebels, so if Elaida can play this right, she can put their doubts to rest and then set Egwene to doing chores out of sight for the rest of her natural life.

Of course, that’s a rather big ‘if’, especially because this is Egwene, after all. Elaida, I’m not sure you’ve yet had a chance to witness Egwene in full ‘I am going to run political rings around you without even breaking a sweat, and then you are going to listen to me or perhaps just stare in awe’ mode. It’s quite spectacular, Elaida. Might I recommend some popcorn?

Some seemed confused, others made curious, by her presence. As she walked, Egwene realised something.

This one evening could easily undo all that she’d worked for.

If the Aes Sedai here saw her subserviently waiting on Elaida, Egwene would lose integrity in their eyes. Elaida had declared that Egwene was cowed – but Egwene had proven otherwise. If she bent to Elaida’s will here, even a little, it would be seen as proof.

Yeah, that. And I’m willing to be that’s at least part of the reason Elaida set this whole thing up. She’s certainly capable of that; she’s deposed an Amyrlin already, and then deposed her own Keeper even when Alviarin had her nearly backed into a corner. Elaida’s not a negligible adversary, for all that she’s a horrible leader in every way.

Example: she’s doing her level best to insult every single person in the room, their Ajah, probably their families, their dogs…

This dinner wasn’t about working with the Ajahs. It was about bullying the Sitters into doing as Elaida felt they should. And Egwene was simply there to be shown off! This was all about proving to the others how much power Elaida had

Yep, sounds about right. And if you have to constantly remind people of how much power you have, and wield it with all the subtlety of a battering ram, you are probably terrible at your job. Just a piece of friendly advice.

The others steered the talk away from the rebels and towards the strangely overcast skies.

When things get awkward, talk about the weather. Anyone want a cup of tea?

“The Seanchan again?” Elaida said with a sigh. “You needn’t worry about them.”

Uh oh. If anything could break Egwene’s determination to remain calm, it would be talking about the Seanchan. Especially to dismiss them.

“My sources say otherwise, Mother,” Shevan said stiffly. “I think we need to pay close attention to what they are doing. I have had some sisters ask this child about her experience with them, which has been extensive. You should hear the things they do to Aes Sedai.”

So Egwene is ‘this child’ to her, but at the same time Shevan sees her as a more…reliable source than Elaida, and is almost taking her side here. Not as Amyrlin, no, but as someone to trust and listen to. And…yeah. Extensive. That’s one way to put it. And Egwene has to listen to this, and say nothing.

Elaida laughed a tinkling, melodic laugh. “Surely you know how the child is prone to exaggerate!” […] “Speak,” Elaida said, gesturing with her cup. “Tell these women you have been speaking lies.”

Fuck you, Elaida. Just…fuck you. Not just for dismissing a threat no matter how many times she’s told about it – does she really think they can’t possibly get here? She herself knows Travelling, and she knows the rebels know it, and at some point enough people know a secret that it stops being a secret – but for the way she laughs at it like this. Egwene’s remembering the worst time of her life, being collared and tortured, and Elaida’s laughing and calling her a liar, calling her a child, saying she’s exaggerating and not to be taken seriously. Asking her to say it was a lie, it never happened, she was just exaggerating, just trying to get attention…That Egwene hasn’t already upended a vat of boiling soup over her head is testament to her willpower at this point.

So go fuck yourself with a balefire rod, Elaida.

And still Egwene holds her composure, and is able to analyse the situation calmly. She is pretty fucking impressive.

She saw five pairs of eyes studying her. She could see their questions. Egwene had spoken boldly to them when alone, but would she hold to her assertions now, faced by the most powerful woman in the world? A woman who held Egwene’s life in her hands?

Was Egwene the Amyrlin? Or was she just a girl who liked to pretend? Light burn you, Elaida, she thought, gritting her teeth, seeing that she had been wrong. Silence wouldn’t lead to victory, not in front of these women. You are not going to like how this proceeds.

Ohhhhhhhh shit. Here we go. Buckle up, Elaida, because Egwene is right. You are not going to like this and you are, I’m pretty sure, in no way prepared for whatever she’s about to throw at you. Shame you had no interest in talking to the rebels; they could have warned you what she’s capable of.

But last Elaida saw of Egwene, Egwene was barely an Accepted, and really did have very little idea what she was doing. And she seems to be aware enough of Egwene’s antics in the Tower recently that she wants to make a example of her and assert her own authority, but I think she still vastly underestimates Egwene, because she still sees her as maybe a puppet or a figurehead or a girl who can put up a halfway decent fight but will fold under pressure.

Still, I just love that ‘you are not going to like how this proceeds’ in Egwene’s thoughts because it’s the mental equivalent of sighing and rolling up her sleeves before kicking some ass.

“I have spread no lies. To say otherwise would be to betray the Three Oaths.”

“You haven’t taken the Three Oaths,” Elaida said sternly, turning toward her.

“I have,” Egwene said. “I’ve held no Oath Rod, but it isn’t the Rod that makes my words true. I have spoken the words of the oaths in my heart, and to me they are more dear, for I have nothing forcing me to hold to them.”

It’s an interesting insight into her stance on the Three Oaths. She gave in to Siuan’s argument about the necessity of them, but I still think some of that is because Siuan’s point was that the Three Oaths give the Aes Sedai their current sense of identity, and to get rid of them would mean shaking those foundations at a time when they can’t afford that. Eventually, though…the fact that Egwene makes the point here about the oaths being stronger for her because she’s not forced to keep them almost suggests an eventual step in that direction. Maybe the oaths can’t be done away with right away – and maybe they shouldn’t – but perhaps after the Last Battle, in a few years, the Oath Rod itself could be gradually done away with, leaving just the oaths themselves as a code of behaviour.

By making this argument at all, Egwene does suggest that it’s the spirit of the oaths more than the Oath Rod itself that’s important; it’s not that the Oaths make Aes Sedai who they are so much as it’s the idea of all sharing this set of values. The Oaths just give the Aes Sedai a great deal of their sense of identity.

“These women know I don’t speak lies,” Egwene said calmly. “And each time you insist that I do, you lower yourself in their eyes. Even if you disbelieve my Dream, you must admit that the Seanchan are a threat. They leash women who can channel, using them as weapons with a kind of twisted ter’angreal. I have felt the collar on my neck. I still feel it, sometimes. In my dreams. My nightmares.”

The room fell still.

“You are a foolish child,” Elaida said, obviously trying to pretend that Egwene was no threat. She should have turned to look at the eyes of the others. If she had, she’d have seen the truth.

She’s underestimated Egwene, and badly. She gave Egwene an opening, not realising just how much Egwene could do with it. Not realising quite how willing the Sitters here are to listen to Egwene, and not realising quite how tenuous her own hold on them is.

I think, actually, that she’s trying to do with Egwene what she did with Alviarin. Then, in front of a room full of Sitters, she told Alviarin to stand in a corner and threatened her with punishment, and then proceeded to assert her authority over the Sitters. It’s a similar enough scenario to this that I think she planned this to have a similar result: she wants to dismiss Egwene in front of witnesses, and make it clear that she can be dismissed. The problem is, Egwene’s foundation is stronger than Alviarin’s was – it’s not a thing of blackmail and coercion but instead of truth and work and leading by example.

And Elaida still hasn’t quite realised that. It worked with Alviarin, it worked with various sisters and even Sitters when she wanted to punish or demote or command them, so why should it not work on this girl of a puppet Amrylin?

“Well, you have forced my hand.”

No, Elaida, you’ve forced hers.

“You will kneel before me, child, and beg forgiveness. Right now. Otherwise, I will lock you away alone. Is that what you want? Don’t think that the beatings will stop, however. You’ll still get your daily penance, you’ll just be thrown back into your cell after each one. Now, kneel and beg forgiveness.” The Sitters glanced at one another.

Again, it’s very similar to what she said to Alviarin: “When I tell you to stand in the corner, Daughter, I expect you to obey. Or Shall I summon the Mistress of Novices so these sisters can witness your “private” penance?’. But the other Sitters had little to no sympathy for Alviarin, because Alviarin didn’t care about them, and had built her authority on threats and blackmail and fear and condescension. Then, it was a case of two people selfishly manoeuvring for power against each other.

Egwene is different. And Elaida doesn’t realise it, and doesn’t realise that the Sitters see this situation very differently – as Elaida taking things too far, rather than setting down someone many of them wanted to see set down. Egwene isn’t in this for her own self-interest, and the fact that she’s calmly standing in a novice dress only highlights how despotic and desperate Elaida’s actions now seem.

There was no backing down now. Egwene wished it hadn’t come to this. But it had, and Elaida had demanded a fight.

It was time to give her one.

It’s such a beautifully reluctant ‘I don’t want to hurt you, but I will if I have to’ gloves coming off moment, and the best part is, Elaida still has no idea.

I don’t even think Elaida has realised they’re fighting.

“And if I do not bow before you?” Egwene asked, meeting the woman’s eyes. “What then?

“You will kneel, one way or another,” Elaida growled, embracing the Source.

“You’ll use the Power on me?” Egwene asked calmly.

First blood to Egwene. Sorry, Elaida, but if you can’t deliver a “kneel and swear, or you will be knelt” then you don’t deserve the obeisance.

“It is within my rights to discipline one who isn’t showing proper respect.” “And so you will make me obey,” Egwene said. “Is this what you will do to everyone in the Tower, Elaida? An Ajah opposes you, and it is disbanded. Someone displeases you, and you try to destroy her right to be Aes Sedai. You will have every sister bowing down before you by the end of this.”

“Nonsense!”

“Oh?” Egwene asked. “And have you told them about your idea for a new oath? Sworn on the Oath Rod by every sister, an oath to obey the Amyrlin and support her?”

“I—”

“Deny it,” Egwene said. “Deny that you made the statement. Will the Oaths let you?”

Elaida froze.

There’s a part of me that feels like this is almost too…easy, like Elaida is giving Egwene too many openings, and not countering strongly enough. But then…I think a lot of it comes down to the fact that Elaida was not expecting a fight at all.

She thought Egwene was beaten, or could easily be beaten. She didn’t see Egwene as a threat, and she certainly didn’t see her as a legitimate challenger. She didn’t see that other Aes Sedai were beginning to listen to Egwene and what she said about Elaida, and to maybe question whether they did the right thing in raising her, or whether she’s doing more damage than good to the Tower. She expected this to be a show of power – the way it has been in the past, with Alviarin or with others. And when you’re absolutely certain of victory, it’s easy to get complacent, and to end up flat on your back on the mat without realising how you got there.

Egwene knows how to take advantage of even the smallest of opportunities or openings. She’s been practicing ever since being raised Amrylin, because then, too, she was expected by everyone around her to have no power at all. So she had to learn to make full use of any and every chance, and not to squander a moment of it. To strike as effectively as possible when no one is expecting it. It’s how she finally managed to win the Hall to her.

And that’s what she’s done here. Elaida gave her a slight opening, because Elaida didn’t realise just what Egwene would be able to do with that. Egwene knew it, and so she went directly for it, and it threw Elaida on the back foot enough to allow Egwene to continue to press the advantage, and because Elaida was caught so off-guard, she isn’t able to recover. Because she never expected that she would have to recover.

The other Aes Sedai in the Tower have, as Silviana said, pretty much let Elaida get away with doing things she shouldn’t be able to do. No one has dared to defy her outright like this, and Elaida’s had enough victories to think that this will follow the same pattern.

So from that angle, it kind of works that Egwene is running roughshod over her at this point. Because that’s largely her tactic: to just keep on pushing and pushing and to take advantage of the slightest opening Elaida gives her, to prevent Elaida from gaining back any ground. Because this is Egwene’s one chance, so she can’t afford to back down even for a moment. And she’s become very good at picking up on anything she can possibly use.

“You locked the Dragon Reborn himself in a box; you just threatened to do the same to me, in front of these witnesses. People call him a tyrant, but you are the one destroying our laws and ruling by fear.”

No one’s called her on it before. Tarna has kind of thought it, but she’s also made an effort to phrase things tactfully, and to try to gently nudge Elaida away from the more disastrous things she’s tried to do.

Elaida’s eyes opened wide, her anger visible. She seemed…shocked. As if she couldn’t understand how she’d gone from disciplining an unruly novice into debating an equal.

Maybe that could have been presented more smoothly, but that does pretty much exactly describe what’s happening here. It’s hard to argue well when you’re not expecting to argue at all. And it’s even harder when your opponent turns out to be a skilled one, especially when they’ve managed to get on the offensive.

I don’t think Elaida ever expected to need to defend herself against these accusations. Not just from Egwene, but from anyone. Because again, no Aes Sedai has even come close to openly calling her out like this. So for her it’s all coming out of nowhere, and she’s having to scramble to find her footing.

Egwene saw the woman begin to weave a thread of Air. That had to be stopped. A gag of Air would end this debate.

“Go ahead,” Egwene said calmly. “Use the Power to silence me. As Amyrlin, shouldn’t you be able to talk an opponent into obedience, rather than resorting to force?”

Out of the corner of her eye, Egwene saw diminuitive Yukiri, of the Grey, nod at that comment.

Quick thinking there, because if Elaida had succeeded in that weave, it would have ended this debate. Maybe it was a reckless thing for Elaida to try – because it ended up giving Egwene yet another opening – but from where she’s standing it was perhaps a risk worth taking. She’s been thrown onto the defensive, and Egwene isn’t giving her much chance to recover, and so shutting the whole thing down even by force if she can get away with it is maybe her best option. That way she could buy herself time to take stock of the situation and smooth things over, or make her excuses, or whatever. It’s just her bad luck that Egwene’s as quick on her feet as she is.

Also, Egwene knows better than to ignore those who are watching. She’s keeping an eye on the Sitters and gauging their reactions – because again, she’s had to do that with the rebels, when every vote counted and subtlety and timing were everything and the stakes were high – whereas Elaida is ignoring them completely, as she has been doing for far too long.

“I don’t need to rebut a mere novice,” Elaida snapped. “The Amyrlin doesn’t explain herself to one such as you.”

“’The Amyrlin understands the most complex of creeds and debates’,” Egwene said, quoting from memory. “’Yet in the end, she is the servant of all, even the lowest of labourers.’” That had been said by Balladare Arandaille, the first Amyrlin to be raised from the Brown Ajah. […] Sitting beside Elaida, Shevan nodded appreciatively.

Elaida’s trying to shut it down – which has worked for her in the past – and again she’s just not prepared for Egwene to have a response at all, much less a good one.

Another part of this is that the stakes are significantly higher here for Egwene than for Elaida. Or rather, Egwene knows they’re higher, whereas Elaida sees it – saw it, anyway – as something more like a formality, or a token gesture. Egwene has just been told that she will have no more access to Aes Sedai, and so this is her one chance to make a strong, lasting impression against Elaida, in front of women with the power and placement to maybe do something about it. She absolutely has to win here, and so she’s giving it everything she has.

Which, again, is far, far more than Elaida ever expected her to have. Underestimate at your own risk.

“What did you intend to do with Rand al’Thor once you captured him?” Egewne said, ignoring the comment.

Now there’s a question someone should have asked long before now. And maybe some did, but they didn’t push it hard enough, or weren’t willing to propose an alternative – because no one really had any idea how to deal with him. They pulled down Siuan as a knee-jerk reaction, when Siuan was pretty much the only person with the semblance of a plan. As Hamilton so eloquently puts it: ‘They don’t have a plan, they just hate mine!’ And so then Elaida went ahead with her disaster and no one else did anything and they ended up in a worse situation than where they started. Typical.

“Have you explained yourself, Elaida? What were your plans? Or will you dodge this question just as you have the others I’ve asked?”

I hereby nominate Egwene al’Vere to moderate every political debate from now on. ‘ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION.’

So now Elaida’s left with no real recourse but to actually engage with her, because she’s tried shutting her down and that didn’t work, and she tried gagging her and that didn’t work, and if she doesn’t regain her footing now she’ll lose credibility fast. As Egwene said, she’s not even answering Egwene so much as the rest of the Sitters – Egwene’s just forced her into that position.

“I would have kept him secure, and well shielded, here in the Tower until it was time for the Last Battle. That would have prevented him from causing the suffering and chaos he’s created in many nations. It was worth the risk of angering him.”

To her credit, I think Elaida genuinely believes that. She isn’t evil, precisely, she’s just so misguided as to make no difference. But I think she really did think that she was serving the best interests of the world here. She just…didn’t think it through enough. But then, she’s hardly the only Aes Sedai to have run into that problem. As the beginning of this chapter so nicely illustrates.

“ ‘As the plough breaks the earth shall he break the lives of men, and all that was shall be consumed in the fire of his eyes’,” Egwene said. “ ‘The trumpets of war shall sound at his footsteps, the ravens feed at his voice, and he shall wear a crown of swords.’”

That is a beautiful response. Quoting, but saying nothing else. Just letting that stand on its own, with all the weight of prophecy behind it, because then it’s not even her argument but something inarguable. And that she chose that particular line, with its imagery of chaos and destruction and power…it’s chilling.

“When you had Rand locked away to be kept ‘secure’, had he yet taken Illian? Had he yet worn what he was to name the Crown of Swords?” “Well, no.”

In contrast, that feels a bit…weak. Not Egwene’s question but Elaida’s response – Aes Sedai so rarely give straight ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers that it seems like she could come up with at least a halfhearted evasion. But then, at the same time, this whole scene has been Elaida being caught unawares by Egwene’s ability to actually stand up to her, and to do so skilfully, that I can also believe that she really has no response at this point.

“And how did you expect him to fulfill the prophecies if he was hidden away in the White Tower?”

If she had led with this question, rather than with the quote, I think Elaida might have been able to find a way around it. But that line of prophecy carries so much weight on its own that the question then falls more heavily into that momentary silence after it.

“How can anything pass at all if he is kept in chains?”

“I…”

“Your logic is astounding, Elaida,” Egwene said coldly.

Ha.

And…yeah. When confronted with it like that, thrown completely off-guard by Egwene bringing the fight to her in the first place, and failing to recover quickly enough to abort before the situation got out of hand, Elaida’s kind of left stranded here. She should have an answer to this, because she should know the Prophecies better. But she relied too heavily, perhaps, on her own Foretelling, and on her certainty that she should be in power and that the Tower should control everything, and she lost sight of the bigger picture.

“Bah,” Elaida said, “you ask meaningless questions. The prophecies would have to be fulfilled. There was no other way.”

“So you’re saying that your attempt to bind him was destined to fail.”

“No, not at all,” Elaida said, red-faced again. “We shouldn’t be bothering with this – it’s not for you to decide upon. No, we should be talking about your rebels, and what they’ve done to the White Tower!”

A good turn of the conversation, an attempt to put Egwene on the defensive. Elaida wasn’t completely incompetent. Just arrogant.

A bit clumsy, perhaps, but it works. Elaida tried and failed to shut down the debate completely, and so now she’s trying to shift its focus, to give a ‘this doesn’t concern you’ answer in order to avoid Egwene’s rather pointed and prurient question, and to move into an argument in which she feels like she can more confidently hold her own and discredit Egwene, by painting her as a rebel and a traitor.

Really, it’s almost exactly the sort of thing you see in political debates. Evasion and deflection, and pressing the advantage – often just by talking over the opponent – whenever possible.

Well. It’s almost exactly the sort of thing you see in political debates except that here the participants are constrained by an oath against lying. Which does change things a bit, especially in terms of how to dodge questions, but…anyway.

“What are you doing, Elaida?” Refusing talks, trying to bully the Sitters into withdrawing? Insulting Ajahs that are not your own?”

Again Elaida underestimates her – she was trying to push Egwene onto the defensive but she still didn’t anticipate Egwene’s ability to continue to turn things to her own advantage. The whole conversation has been a dance of power shifts, in which Elaida went in confidently assuming the lead, and Egwene just flipped it on her time and again, and refused to let her recover, largely by anticipating her moves and straight up refusing to back down, and pressing with truth so as not to give Elaida an easy foothold to push back against.

Doesine, of the Yellow, gave a quiet murmur of agreement. That drew Elaida’s eyes, and she fell silent for a moment, as if realising that she had lost control of the debate. “Enough of this.”

“Coward,” Egwene said.

She can’t let Elaida withdraw. Egwene has to win this one outright, and the only way is to keep going. Elaida’s trying to pull back, and maybe she would be able to, and so now Egwene is going to try to provoke her. Because that’s her best bet now – she’s made her case as clearly as she can, but she had a limited window in which to do so, and now she just needs to bring this to a conclusion because otherwise it could still slip away from her. She has to see it all the way through.

And she held back from petty insults earlier; she kept herself to truth and logic, because she was trying to discredit Elaida and make an actual point. Now, she’s done as much as she can on that, and so she finally just throws out an insult, because Elaida is never going to just concede the debate to Egwene – instead, Egwene needs to push her over the edge somehow.

Elaida’s eyes flared wide. “How dare you!”

“I dare the truth, Elaida,” Egwene said quietly. “You are a coward and a tyrant. I’d name you Darkfriend as well, but I suspect that the Dark One would perhaps be embarrassed to associate with you.”

I mean, you’re not wrong…but this line feels a bit too much like a zingy one-liner. And I think that’s kind of the point – Egwene’s just trying to provoke her now, rather than to actually make a claim, but I liked the flat ‘coward’ better. Ah well.

Elaida screeched, weaving in a flash of Power, slamming Egwene back against the wall

Well, it worked. And maybe implying that Elaida was a Darkfriend is what Egwene needed to do in order to get Elaida to truly lose control – because Elaida doesn’t think of herself as evil, so the idea of that would be abhorrent to her.

A blast of woven Air slammed Egwene against the wall again, and she dropped to the ground, hitting shards of the broken pitcher that sliced open her arms. A dozen switches beat her, ripping her clothing. Blood seeped from her arms, and it began to splash into the air, smirching the wall as Elaida beat her.

Shit. Wow. Okay that…uh. That escalated quickly?

But then, that was what Egwene needed to have happen, I think. She was winning the argument, but to guarantee victory she needed Elaida to lose control like this in front of witnesses, and to do something unforgivable. Otherwise it might not have been enough – maybe the Sitters would have remembered the debate, and considered it, and maybe they would have done something…or maybe it would have faded after a while, and Elaida would have found a way to reassert herself, and Egwene would be in the kitchens or locked away or otherwise out of sight. She needed to bring this to a tipping point and then give it a massive shove over.

The switches continued to beat Egwene. She bore it silently. With effort, she stood up. She could feel her face and arms swelling already. But she maintained a calm gaze at Elaida.

“Elaida!” Ferane yelled, standing. “You violate Tower law! You cannot use the Power to punish an initiate!”

“I am Tower law!” Elaida raved.

Well that’s right on key for Elaida. She’s finally snapped and Egwene’s bearing the pain of it but even so, it’s a victory.

“You show me deference when you see me, but I know what you say, what you whisper. You ungrateful fools! After what I’ve done for you! Do you think I’ll suffer you forever? Take this one as an example!”

“After what I’ve done for you,” Elaida says, as Egwene stands there calmly bleeding for the Tower, essentially martyring herself.

She spun, pointing at Egwene, then stumbled back in shock to find Egwene calmly watching her. Elaida gasped softly, raising a hand to her breast as the switches beat. They could all see the weaves, and they could all see that Egwene did not scream, although her mouth was not gagged with Air. Her arms dripped blood, her body was beaten before them, and yet she found no reason to scream. Instead, she quietly blessed the Aiel Wise Ones for their wisdom.

So like and unlike Rand being beaten and forcing himself to smile. Defiance in the face of agony.

But it paints such a harsh, clear contrast between Egwene and Elaida. Elaida demands obedience and demands respect and punishes those who do not give it, because she arrogantly assumes it to be her due. She clings to power as she destroys the Tower around her. Egwene is beaten daily and set menial labour and treated as a novice, but holds herself as Amyrlin. She does not demand recognition or respect, but earns it. She is given no authority but does everything she can from her position to heal the Tower, because it is her duty. And now she stands here beaten and bleeding and still the very image of Aes Sedai serenity.

“By the Light,” Rubinde whispered.

Yeah. It’s…quite an image.

“I wish I weren’t needed here, Elaida,” Egwene said softly. “I wish that the Tower had a grand Amyrlin in you. I wish I could step down and accept your rule. I wish you deserved it. I would willingly accept execution, if it would mean leaving a competent Amyrlin. The White Tower is more important than I am. Can you say the same?”

This is absolutely beautiful. I…yeah. Wow.

First there’s just the contrast of this soft tone, benevolent and serene, against a background of violence.

And the fact that she’s saying this while being beaten bloody drives home the truth of her words – she will accept her fate calmly because she serves a higher cause, and they cannot possibly disbelieve her, seeing her like this. She will bleed and not flinch, because the White Tower is more important. That, beyond everything else, is the difference between the two of them, and in this moment it’s impossible not to see it.

“Send for soldiers! I want this one cast into the deepest cell this Tower can provide!”

Well, I guess we can tick another parallel off the list…

“Let it be voiced through the city that Egwene al’Vere is a Darkfriend who has rejected the Amyrlin’s grace!”

If it weren’t for the fact that there are witnesses, or that Egwene just took Elaida apart in a debate, this might actually work. Even as it is, if Elaida can find a way to control these few Sitters, she could still win. It wouldn’t be too far off of what she did to Siuan, after all – they killed Siuan’s Warder and then tortured her and Leane, and Elaida managed to make those actions seem at least acceptable in the circumstances. She could pull it off; she’s out of control but she’s not quite incompetent enough to discount.

It had come to a head, as she’d feared that it would. She had cast her lot. But she didn’t fear for her life. Instead, she feared for the White Tower. As she leaned back against the wall, thoughts fading, she was overcome with sorrow.

Her battle from within the Tower was at an end, one way or another.

Well. It had to come to this eventually, and…as she said, she’s cast her lot. She built as much of a foundation as she was able to in the time she had, and she took every opportunity she could to do what she needed to do. And when it came down to this, to what seemed like her last chance to act, she brought everything she could to this one battle. It was spectacular, and now it just has to be enough.

Next (TGS ch 17) Previous (TGS ch 15)

#that was a long chapter #worth it though #Wheel of Time #neuxue liveblogs WoT #The Gathering Storm

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ramrodd · 4 years

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Why didn’t Ayn Rand follow her philosophy? I’m asking about her romantic relationship with Nathaniel, because it seems like she wanted him to live for her which is against her philosophy.

COMMENTARY:

What Ayn Rand loved doing more than anything was running her mouth. She enjoyed exploring intellectual subjects and a deconstructing them and looking at them in all their parts and pieces and seeing how it fit into her narrative of existence as a perfect reality. On paper. As a static collage of sound bites and mechanisms of dialectical design that ultimately validated her core technology: the Virtue of Selfishness. And, once she got it on paper, dominating conversations the rest of her life because she really loved running her mouth.

In that regard, the relationship between Ayn Rand and Nathaniel Brandan began as oral sex in the back seat of a car with her husband driving in the front seat. Not Pornhub oral sex but the sort of oral sex Kellyanne Conway employs with Donald John Trump*. Only Rand and Brandan were playing a hyper-speed game of cognitive pong, bouncing ideas that seemed to carry a similar emotional valance, because Ayn Rand claimed to be all Reason, with Passion as a spur to her thinking, but it was typical of her entire psychology, an inverted system, like Marx, where Passion is the essential driver and a spur to her need to rationalize her Passions as Metaphysical Truth and Delivered Wisdom. In her personal construct of Reality, her virtue was in the absolute rational basis of her Self-Esteem.

Rand was profoundly visual. In terms of the Neuro-Linguistic Program epistemology, there are 5 learning modalities: seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, and smelling (a 6th being orienting, that is, balance and the middle ear, but it isn’t, actually, a learning modality: it is a holograph of all modalities). Rand was also profounding auditory, because she loved to run her mouth to hear herself run her mouth, but the physics of touch was largely missing. In point of fact, she was frightened of pain and one of fallacies of her notions of the rational and personal will power was that you could rise above mere physical discomfort.

That’s why John Galt doesn’t break a sweat under torture: as her Aryan Ideal, he rose above mere physical tormet by will power, which caused his torturers distress in his stead.

Her husband, Frank O’Conner, shared an Aryan Archetype with Gary Cooper and she had almost literally dragged him off a Hollywood bus to marry her because her visa was running out and she didn’t want to return to Bolschevik Russia. If her mother hadn’t been able to obtain that visa, Rand would have died in the Gulag or shot as reactionary. If there is any doubt in your mind as to the Big Lie that Soviet Russia was a Worker’s Paradise, it’s worth it to read Rand to sample her paranoia lingering from her life at St. Petersburg University, when “altruism” became the politically correct social ethos. She was badly frightened her entire life. It is worth considering when considering things like the Oliver Stone version of Vietnam and why ve were there at all.

But that’s another story. Frank was a perfectly decent guy whose soul was sucked hollow by Rand’s emotional vampirism. Never loose sight of “selfishness” in all things Rand. Frank was something of a whipped puppy in the shadow of Rand’s towering intellectual powers and my guess would be that most of Rand’s rape fantasies in The Fountainhead originate in the passive nature of Frank’s libido.

And Nathan Branden was married to a fairly typical pre-Zipless fuck woman during an era when “sexual frigidity” was the curse of the American white middle class, and provided Rand exactly the post-adolescent libido she had been seeking all during the composition of The Fountainhead.

Dagny Taggart is a direct consequence of what became a torrid affair after the oral sex in the back seat with her husband driving. In my limited library, she is one of the most vivid female characters in literature, bar none. For various reasons, she is probably the inspiration for “Little Annie Fannie” in Playboy during the 60s, Terry Southern’s “Candy”, and the “Cosmo Woman”, all in one package. Until she meets John Galt, she is all technicolor in Rand’s grim smog filled dystopia. At one point, she is giving a pep talk to a bunch of her railroad workers in the middle of the night in a mink coat and a Versace-style gown with nothing underneath and you can just see her nipples puckered by the chill and her excitement from her cheerleading.

Back when Atlas Shrugged came out, Dagny Taggart was pretty racy stuff to boys looking for the sex scenes in any book they read. I mean, AS came out about the same time Hugh Hefner began publishing and Tropic of Cancer was still banned in Boston. Dagny Taggart’s role, functionally, is to pull the adolescent male through the first two thirds of the novel in an extented turtorial on the virtue of money and the essence of a man’s soul being worth the money he’s paid or however her bullshit goes. And, then, John Galt appears, and Dagny Taggart goes to black and white, because his genius is too brilliant to allow for a mere prism to reduce it to its elemental wave lengths.

But it is all allegory. The only thing standing between this perfect reality and existence is the ability to change the world by changing your mind and the will power to make it stick.

The thing is, Rand’s system of thought is based entirely on the expectation that everyone around her would live for her as the result of purely rantional analysis. It doesn’t seem to occur to her that the nihilism inherent in the Virtue of Selfishness mitigates against exactly the sort of interdependence required to maintain anything but the sort of transactional social ethos of Donald John Trump*. When he broke it off, Nathaniel Branden was operating on exactly the social contract she professed as the only possible life-style for Man qua Man.

I mean, ask yourself, why does the Party of Personal Responsibility not live by it’s own philosophy of Personal Responsibility. Because they actually mean it’s someone else’s Personal Responsibility: it’s Obama’s fault.

That’s why Mit Romney is being shunned: it’s like being confronted by the fact that Ayn Rand didn’t live by her own philosophy because it was really a philosophy other people had to adopt to live with her. Or be a hater of the mind. In Romney’s case, A RINO.

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networkingdefinition · 4 years

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Manage Quotes

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We know for a fact that he didn’t pay any income taxes in 1978, 1979, 1984, 1992 and 1994. We know because of the reports of the New Jersey Casino Control Commission. We don’t know about any year after that. – Hillary Clinton • Donald Trump manages to personalize everything. He brings chaos. He will not admit that he’s ever made a mistake, that he’s ever been wrong. – Mark Shields • Drug addiction is an incredibly difficult challenge to manage on one’s own. When I think of all the stories I’ve heard from people, the common denominator is that they all were ultimately able to find somebody who was willing to support them. Maybe it was someone they knew, like a parent or a sibling or a friend; other times it was a treatment center with a compassionate staff who didn’t give up on them. That made all the difference. – Vivek Murthy • Earning a lot of money is not the key to prosperity. How you handle it is. – Dave Ramsey • Egypt’s priorities in fact are all related to the environment: food, water, health, energy, employment and education. Egypt is facing some very serious environmental challenges. The country has limited natural resources and has to decide how to manage these to meet the needs of a growing population. – Mindy Baha El Din • Either you run the day or the day runs you. – Jim Rohn • Every time I’ve gone to Brazil I’ve gotten sick upon return. You know, it’s just a different situation there. And I take every precaution – eating cooked foods and staying away from tap water, brushing my teeth with bottled water – and yet I still manage to get sick. So I’m just going to stay on point, bring my probiotics. – Kerri Walsh • Everybody wants to manage me; management is a touchy situation. – Boi-1da • Everything considered, a determined soul will always manage. – Albert Camus • For me, what was important was to record everything I saw around me, and to do this as methodically as possible. In these circumstances a good photograph is a picture that comes as close as possible to reality. But the camera never manages to record what your eyes see, or what you feel at the moment. The camera always creates a new reality. – Alfredo Jaar • For those of us who worry more about working people than about windfall profits for oil companies, it may net out. A better question is: what does it do to our economy if we manage to overheat the earth? This summer’s drought provides a small taste. – Bill McKibben • Freedom is the slogan which speaks to the ears of people who feel strong enough to manage on their own using their own resources, who can do without dependency because they can do without others caring for them. – Zygmunt Bauman • Generally I still believe that Lewis [Hamilton] is the best champion that we have had in a long, long time. He manages to get to all different walks of life: red carpet, fashion business, and music – you name it. – Bernie Ecclestone • Good design successfully manages the tensions between user needs, technology feasibility, and business viability. – Tim Brown • Google has already tested robot cars in San Francisco. If they can navigate San Francisco, they can probably manage just about anywhere. – Norman Foster • Harvard has something that manages, I think, to provide a lot of options for students, but still fairly prescriptive about the kinds of subjects that the courses ought to cover. – Louis Menand • Having inborn capabilities doesn’t matter. Whether you can manage them or not, that’s what determines the victory or defeat. – Hong Jin-joo • History reports that the men who can manage men manage the men who can manage only things, and the men who can manage money manage all. – Will Durant • However, we need to participate and manage skillfully, helpfully, and harmoniously, for a better world, family and society to be possible. So everybody’s spiritual by nature I believe, not that they necessarily have to be religious. Everybody wants, or cares about, and has values even if they don’t talk about them all the time explicitly, like some noisy preachers do with their foghorn voices and dogmatic views. – Surya Das • Humans are really interesting. We’re so clever, what we do with our brain. How we manage to con ourselves into thinking all sorts of things is really fascinating. By the same token, if we could just convince ourselves of things that would gather us together and powerfully turn things around for the good, that would be awesome. It’s doubtful because we’re such a fear-based species. – Thandie Newton • I always tried to manage my money smart. – Rakim • I am inspired by working moms. Mothers who somehow balance the demands of their many lives – professional, familial, personal, and interior – and still manage to make time to have fun and invest in themselves! This is a huge challenge that I look forward to taking on. – Daphne Oz • I believe in the not-too-distant future, people are going to learn to trust their information to the Net more than they now do, and be able to essentially manage very large amounts and perhaps their whole lifetime of information in the Net with the notion that they can access it securely and privately for as long as they want, and that it will persist over all the evolution and technical changes. – Robert E. Kahn • I can’t manage without homeopathy. In fact, I never go anywhere without homeopathic remedies. – Paul McCartney • I care deeply about Democratic party and our agenda and making sure that we can continue to build on President [Barack] Obama`s legacy. So any suggestion that I am doing anything other than manage this primary impartially and neutrally is ludicrous. – Hillary Clinton • I continued blogging, but between illness and deadlines, did not manage to blog nearly as much as last year. I’m hoping to do better in 2016. – Justine Larbalestier • I didn’t have to do too much “research” or acting to play this guy. (laughs) It is actually very difficult to manage all the time. The Community schedule is crushing and it kills me because I don’t get to be with my family as much as I’d like. – Joel McHale • I do try to be of some use in the world. I sometimes do volunteer work with kids, and manage to help some people a little, but really making a significant difference can be hard. – John Shirley • I don’t have a lot of time for managing [my businesses], so I put a lot of trust in people I hire to manage my businesses. I can’t necessarily attend to [the businesses] while I’m in season. We swap ideas on how we can improve and deliver a better product. – Kamerion Wimbley • I don’t have too many pests. My concept is this: I manage myself, and there’s nothing wrong with people having managers. – Vickie Winans • I don’t think she ever had a single initiative at the United Nations that was not previously [vetted] by the people at the State Department, approved of, and authorized. She did manage to get around the world an awful lot, and find other parts of her vast slum project that needed repair. But I don’t think that that was the main point. The main point was that she, after all, connoted Franklin Roosevelt, who by then was long dead, and had a certain prestige and power on that account. – William A. Rusher • I had a horrible life habit that I had to change. And I think it’s very true, the later we make decisions in life that are important, the harder it is to manage those decisions. – John C. Maxwell • I had never written about what it’s like to live the life of a writer, and I had never read a book that combined talking about the life of writing and how you can do it, how you can stand it, how you can emotionally manage it, with the choices that we all make on the page. – Alice Mattison • I have a seven-level program and through even into the fifth level it can be all done from a distance. “Why not?” is how I feel about it, because energy is not confined by time or space, so why should my teaching be. I’m teaching energy and how to manage it, how to handle it, and how to heal with it. – Deborah King • I have found, without a doubt, that when I manage to get outside myself and not make myself the center, I’m always taken care of in whatever situation I’m in, even if I’m slow to recognize it. It’s counterintuitive thinking on some level and not consistently easy to do. – Patrick Fabian • I have to kind of like switch heads. Sometimes I manage it seamlessly, and other times I feel rather all over the place. I feel a bit schizophrenic, like I have a split personality. – Emma Watson • I know a lot of people in Washington would say, well, you know, indigent people can’t manage their health savings account. They’re too stupid. But they’re not too stupid. Somebody has a diabetic foot ulcer, they learn very quickly not to go the emergency room where it costs five times more to take care of it. They go to the clinic. – Benjamin Carson • I no longer think that learning how to manage people, especially subordinates, is the most important for executives to learn. I am teaching above all else, how to manage oneself. – Peter Drucker • I remember once reading that it is still not understood how the giraffe manages to pump an adequate blood supply all the way up to its head; but it is hard to imagine that anyone would conclude tht giraffes do not have long necks. At least not anyone who had ever been to a zoo – Robert Solow • I said, I’ll put on weight. And I started having massages, taking cod-liver oil, and eating twice as much. But I didn’t even gain an ounce. I’d made up my mind that on the day the engagement was announced I’d be fatter, and I didn’t gain an ounce. Then I went to Mussoorie, which is a health resort, and I ignored the doctors’ instructions; I invented my own regime and gained weight. Just the opposite of what I’d like now. Now I have the problem of keeping slim. Still I manage. I don’t know if you realize I’m a determined woman. – Indira Gandhi • I say the elite looks out of touch because it’s kind of saying; look we’ll manage all this for you. You know, we know best. We’ll sort it all out for you. And then because people believe that doesn’t meet their case for change and they want real change, social media and the way the relationship between people can come into a sense of belonging very quickly, that then is itself a revolutionary phenomenon. You see this around the world. – Tony Blair • I say this ironically, not because I favor the State, but because people are not in the state of mind right now where they feel that they can manage themselves. We have to go through an educational process – which does not involve, in my opinion, compromises with the State. But if the State disappeared tomorrow by accident, and the police disappeared and the army disappeared and the government agencies disappeared, the ironical situation is that people would suddenly feel denuded. – Murray Bookchin • I say, make the decision, and as soon as you make the decision, the rest of your life you just manage that decision on a daily basis. – John C. Maxwell • I talk about my daily dozen in the book [ Today Matters]. Twelve things that are certainly attainable by any of us that we need to manage every day. – John C. Maxwell • I think a lot of women are incredibly tough and they’re just really admirable. Especially the way that, given what they’ve got, they just manage to carry on. – Jo Brand • I think being able to sit in the shoes of a woman and being able to manage products that are mostly sold to women, alongside a lot of female employees, is really helpful because you hold that empathy to the situation. You can understand where the customer is coming from. – Maureen Chiquet • I think everybody plays a role in their own aging. Some people accelerate it. Some people slow it down. Some people manage to reverse it. It all depends on how much you are invested in the hypnosis of our social condition. So if you believe that at a certain age you have to die and you become dysfunctional, then you will. – Deepak Chopra • I think I may drop dead on the stage someday. I hate to think of it. But it’s getting tough on me, the travel. The show, I somehow manage to rise up to it, you know. But I have no desire to retire. – Hal Holbrook • I think Pep Guardiola is a top manager. There’s no doubt about that. Not only did he manage Messi and Iniesta, but he made them better and took them to levels they’d never been before. The best team I’ve ever seen is Pep Guardiola’s Barcelona. I’m sure his management got something to do with that.- Jamie Carragher • I think you learn about yourself through experiences – as many of them as you can manage. – Bonnie Fuller • I want as many people to see the show [Hamilton] in its musical theater form as possible before it’s translated, and whether it’s a good act of translation or a bad act of translation, it’s a leap, and very few stage shows manage the leap successfully. – Lin-Manuel Miranda • I wanted to get that scholarship to – a division one scholarship and play ball and go to school for free. And that, to me, was – I was always about getting to that next step. If I could get to that next place, then I could figure out essentially what to do with being in that space and how to manage my time and handle those – handle all the benefits of being in that space in a way that would get me to the next place. – Mahershala Ali • I was just shitty, shitty, shitty with money and I finally, when I really started making money, I had to get somebody to sit down with me and learn how to manage my money. – Miriam Shor • I would say, you have a unique chance of learning more about the game of chess with your computer than Bobby Fischer, or even myself, could manage throughout our entire lives. What is very important is that you will use this power productively and you will not be hijacked by the computer screen. Always keep your personality intact. – Garry Kasparov • I write for anybody struggling to manage their money. – Michelle Singletary • I`m 100 percent impartial. I`m – my responsibility is to manage this primary nominating contest neutrally and fairly. – Hillary Clinton • If America is to compete effectively in world markets, its corporate leaders must strategically position their companies in the right businesses, and then manage their workforces in the right ways. However, the nation has a shortage of business leaders who understand the importance of utilizing human capital to gain competitive advantage, let alone the know-how to do so. In the future, that shortcoming promises to be exacerbated because few business schools today teach aspiring executives how to create the kind of high-involvement organizations. – James O’Toole • If democracy is ever to be threatened, it will not be by revolutionary groups burning government offices and occupying the broadcasting and newspaper offices of the world. It will come from disenchantment, cynicism and despair caused by the realisation that the New World Order means we are all to be managed and not represented. – Tony Benn • If I can learn how to manage myself, why would I give you 20 percent and people are looking for me? It just doesn’t make sense. – Vickie Winans • If we manage to last in spite of everything, it is because our infirmities are so many and so contradictory that they cancel each other out. – Emile M. Cioran • If we offer a prize, so to speak, to anyone who manages to bring a country under his physical control – namely, that they can then sell the country’s resources and borrow in its name – then it’s not surprising that generals or guerrilla movements will want to compete for this prize. But that the prize is there is really not the fault of the insiders. It is the fault of the dominant states and of the system of international law they maintain. – Thomas Pogge • If Wes Anderson has a very strong cast, he can direct the minutia of that story and still manage to have something that lives and breathes. – Susan Sarandon • If you are not consciously directing your life, you will lose your footing and circumstances will decide for you. – Michael Beckwith • If you have a strong business idea, then it is comparatively easy now to get capital. It is a positive thing that increasingly more people want to join the startup bandwagon. However, to build a successful business, focus on creating more value through the product, and direct your efforts on solving real issues. If you manage to build a sustainable product, revenue will follow. A lot of startups fail because they concentrate on incremental innovations, increasing user base, and monetisation before strengthening the core of their business. – Bhavin Turakhia • If you never allow your children to exceed what they can do, how are they ever going to manage adult life – where a lot of it is managing more than you thought you could manage? – Ellen Galinsky • If you pick the right people and give them the opportunity to spread their wings and put compensation as a carrier behind it you almost don’t have to manage them. – Jack Welch • If you want to lead a family/team/organization, learn to lead/manage yourself first. – Bradford Winters • If you want to manage somebody, manage yourself. Do that well and you’ll be ready to stop managing. And start leading. – Mark Gonzales • I’m not a great fan of people who suddenly manage to pull out the whole track sounding perfect from a laptop. That doesn’t feel like any kind of show to me. – Thighpaulsandra • I’m pretty cerebral, so I can occasionally rationalize emotional pain away, but when I can’t, that’s when I start to feel the fire inside take over and somehow manage to power through. – Nathan Parsons • I’m so blessed with my Baby. […] I just want the most normal life possible for him. […] I will manage. I will create that. – Britney Spears • I’m suggesting that principles meant to deal with uncertainty that occurs naturally can be useful to manage the uncertainty that characterizes any new idea. – Scott D. Anthony • I’m working from home a lot. That’s very unusual because I’m away a lot, sometimes working on the other side of the world for long periods of time. So, it’s hard to manage in the sense that I want to be the best dad I can be but it’s almost harder when you have your kids outside the door. – Andy Serkis • In a corporate context, companies have to try very hard to oppose the enticements of conventional wisdom. They must aim for the leaps, which means that companies have to do more than simply manage their knowledge, which is composed of the insights and understandings they already know. They also have to manage the knowledge-generation process. It’s not just about, “Oh, we’re going to create a data warehouse and we are going to invent a computerized filing system to get at all the stuff we know.” – John Kao • In a growing number of states, you’re actually expected to pay back the costs of your imprisonment. Paying back all these fees, fines, and costs may be a condition of your probation or parole. To make matters worse, if you’re one of the lucky few who actually manages to get a job following release from prison, up to 100% of your wages can be garnished to pay back all those fees, fines and court costs. One hundred percent. – Michelle Alexander • In a world where the 2 billionth photograph has been uploaded to Flickr, which looks like an Eggleston picture! How do you deal with making photographs with the tens of thousands of photographs being uploaded to Facebook every second, how do you manage that? How do you contribute to that? What’s the point? – Alec Soth • In the book [Today Matters] I talk about successful people make important decisions early in their life, and then they manage those decisions the rest of their life. – John C. Maxwell • In The Deep End, you have a woman who looks like a J. Crew mother who can manage it all. Then we begin to realize what’s going on inside. Every time I see one of those women stuck at a stoplight with the children in the back of her car, I sort of think, “What have you just done? What’s going on in your life?”. – Tilda Swinton • In trying to address the systemic problem of racial injustice, we would do well to look at abolitionism, because here is a movement of radicals who did manage to effect political change. Despite things that radical movements always face, differences and divisions, they were able to actually galvanize the movement and translate it into a political agenda. – Manisha Sinha • Iraqi Kurds, out of desperate necessity, have forged one of the most watchful and vigilant anti-terrorist communities in the world. Terrorists from elsewhere just can’t operate in that kind of environment. Al Qaeda members who do manage to infiltrate are hunted down like rats. This conservative Muslim society did a better job protecting me from Islamist killers than the U.S. military could do in the Green Zone in Baghdad. – Michael Totten • Isn’t it fascinating that Nazis always manage to adopt the word freedom? – Steig Larsson • It is no exaggeration to say that rising inequality has driven many of the 99 percent into a financial ditch. It also helped spawn the housing bubble that gave us the financial crisis of 2008, the lingering effects of which have forced many OWS protesters to try to launch their careers in by far the most inhospitable labor market we’ve seen since the Great Depression. Even those recent graduates who manage to find jobs will suffer a lifelong penalty in reduced wages. – Robert H. Frank • It is well known that you can only manage what you measure, and as this is the job of professional accountants, it means they have huge influence on companies’ governance. – Kofi Annan • It would be horrible to be micro-managed! I don’t think directors can really micro-manage people. It’s just impossible. – Janusz Kaminski • It’s all matter of attitude. You could let a lot of things bother you if you wanted to But it’s pretty much the same anywhere you go, you can manage. – Haruki Murakami • It’s also so cool to be able to develop the talent to be able to jump and control the motorcycle which is a very fun thing to do but it’s hard to manage the two. It’s so easy to get hurt, and that’s the last thing I want to do. – Jeff Hardy • It’s difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage. – Dov Davidoff • It’s important to know how to lead and manage a classroom with flexibility. Students of all ages are quite capable of learning these routines and contributing to their success once the teacher is comfortable guiding students in that direction. – Carol Ann Tomlinson • It’s important to wake up everyday and remind yourself what you’re working towards. You create your own life, it’s not set out there for you. – Shay Mitchell • It’s like learning to fall properly. If you can manage not to tighten up you won’t hurt yourself as much. The same theory applies to your day, physically and emotionally. The tensions simply can’t take hold. – Diane von Furstenberg • It’s the people that ultimately are less talented or have less confidence in what they’re doing that then try to micro-manage, which lends itself to a less than ideal film. – Ari Graynor • Just listen to what Mr. [Donald] Trump has to say and make your own judgment with respect to how confident you feel about his ability to manage things like our nuclear triad. – Barack Obama • Let me just say you could end this violence within a very short period of time, have a complete ceasefire – which Iran could control, which Russia could control, which Syria could control, and which we and our coalition friends could control – if one man would merely make it known to the world that he doesn’t have to be part of the long-term future; he’ll help manage Syria out of this mess and then go off into the sunset, as most people do after a period of public life. If he were to do that, then you could stop the violence and quickly move to management. – John F. Kerry • Liberating is a gay word, so let’s phrase it this way: I know everything about me and still manage to be good friends with myself, so nothing anyone says that’s truthful about me ever bothers me. – Jim Goad • Like any working mother, I have to balance and manage my time very carefully. My children and husband come first, of course, then my work. – Andrea Davis Pinkney • Look at the history of the printing press, when this was invented what sort of consequences this had. Or industrialization, what sort of consequences that had. Very often, it led to enormous transformational processes within individual societies. And it took awhile until societies learned how to find the right kind of policies to contain this and manage and steer this. – Angela Merkel • Manage the dream: Create a compelling vision, one that takes people to a new place, and then translate that vision into a reality. – Warren G. Bennis • Management is efficiency in climbing the ladder of success; leadership determines whether the ladder is leaning against the right wall. – Stephen Covey • Managing brands is going to be more and more about trying to manage everything that your company does. – Lee Clow • Managing risk is a key variable, frankly, all aspects of life, business is just one of them, and one of the things that most people do in terms of managing risk, that’s actually bad thinking, is they think they can manage risk to zero. Everything has some risk to it. You know, you drive your car down the street, a drunk driver may hit you. So what you’re doing is you’re actually trying to get to an acceptable level of risk. – Reid Hoffman • Many people who gain recognition and fame shape their lives by overcoming seemingly insurmountable obstacles, only to be catapulted into new social realities over which they have less control and manage badly. Indeed, the annals of the famous and infamous are strewn with individuals who were both architects and victims of their life courses. – Albert Bandura • Margaret Thatcher – a woman I greatly admire – once said that she was not content to manage the decline of a great nation. Neither am I. I am prepared to lead the resurgence of a great nation. – Carly Fiorina • Michelle Obama is a powerful example of someone who has learned how to align her actions with her values, manage boundaries across domains of life, and embrace change courageously. – Stewart D. Friedman • Money is a big part of your life, and when you learn how to get your finances under control, all areas of your life will soar. – T. Harv Eker • More than print and ink, a newspaper is a collection of fierce individualists who somehow manage to perform the astounding daily miracle of merging their own personalities under the discipline of the deadline and retain the flavor of their own minds in print. – Arthur Ochs Sulzberger • My belief is that there will be very large numbers of Internet-enabled devices on the Net – home appliances, office equipment, things in the car and maybe things that you carry around. And since they’re all on the Internet and Internet-enabled, they’ll be manageable through the network, and so we’ll see people using the Net and applications on the Net to manage their entertainment systems, manage their, you know, office activities and maybe even much of their social lives using systems on the Net that are helping them perform that function. – Vinton Cerf • My daughters have strong personalities. I’m close to them but they don’t really need me to advise them on how to manage their lives and they don’t ask me to do that. – Bernie Ecclestone • My occupation has been a great deal with David Foster Wallace, and he didn’t manage it, and he was very much looking for something that isn’t totally selfish, and finding meaning. It’s a struggle. – Tom Courtenay • n truth, we don’t know a whole lot of what Simeon North did. He did manage to match John Hall’s ability to make interchangeable parts, but it’s not clear how much of that came from Hall and how much was original with North. – Charles R. Morris • Now each race is different every time because it’s a different journey to get to it – the difficulties you faced getting the car into that position. I manage myself. I chose my team myself. So there’s a huge satisfaction for me. – Lewis Hamilton • Now we’re in a very different economy. Throughout the late 1980s and 1990s American management started to do the right things. There was extraordinary investment in technology. The dominant questions now are less how to do it better, how to manage better, how to make the economy better, than how to have fuller and more meaningful lives. Because the irony is, now that we’ve come through this great transition, even though our organizations and our people are extraordinarily productive, many feel that the nonwork side of life is very thin. – Robert Reich • Now what I do is I manage that decision. And I teach them in the book how – know what decision to make and then how to manage those decisions. It’s a very – it’s a personal growth book [Today Matters]; that’s what it is. – John C. Maxwell • Now, the situation is much worse in Indonesia than 10 years ago. It is because then, there was still some hope. The progressive Muslim leader Abdurrahman Wahid, was alive and so was Pramoedya Ananta Toer. Mr Wahid, a former President of Indonesia, was a closet Socialist. He was deposed by a judicial coup constructed by the Indonesian elites and military, but many Indonesians still believed that he would manage to make a comeback. – Andre Vltchek • Nowadays, we have to deal with so many more factors that weren’t there in the past. It’s not enough to be a good rider, if you want to finish at the front. The riders have become incredible athletes. In the past, you could manage the race and fight only on the last laps. Now you need to train hard. You cannot allow yourself to go on track without being at 100 percent. – Valentino Rossi • Of course some people manage to write books really young and publish really young. But for most writers, it takes several years because you have to apprentice yourself to the craft, and you also have to grow up. I think maturity is connected to one’s ability to write well. – Cheryl Strayed • One of the most difficult things is to get truthful people. Nobody can manage well if they don’t have a lot of mirrors around them that are honest, that tell them what they’re doing is wrong or wrongheaded or misconceived. And in every large bureaucracy on earth, most people are afraid to tell the boss the truth. – Robert Reich • Oppressors do not get to be oppressors in a single sweep. They manage it because little by little, we make them that. We overlook too much in the beginning and wonder why we lost control in the end. – Joan D. Chittister • Our conscious minds are rapidly overwhelmed with the few tasks that they attempt to manage. That’s why our unconscious minds have evolved to handle so much of our thinking. – Nick Morgan • Our government is operating within an unprecedented revenue shortfall and that we have an obligation to all citizens of the province to manage our finances responsibly. And that’s what we’re going to do. – Rachel Notley • People always ask, “How do you get in the mind of the teen reader?” I think all human beings have these common threads. We struggle with the same things. We desire love and attachment. We have to sort out how much we want to be attached and be independent, how we manage need and being needed and being hurt. These are things that begin when we’re – how old? Then in those teen years we start to really feel them. – Deb Caletti • People are looking for some means of control and what that means is is that the politics in all of our countries is gonna require us to manage technology and global integration and all these demographic shifts in a way that makes people feel more control, that gives them more confidence in their future. – Barack Obama • People seem able to love their dogs with an unabashed acceptance that they rarely demonstrate with family or friends. The dogs do not disappointment them, or, if they do, the owners manages to forget about it quickly. I want to learn to love people like this, the way I love my dog, with pride and enthusiasm and a complete amnesia for faults. In short, to love others the way my dog loves me. – Ann Patchett • People who are great thinkers, in science or in art, people who are great performers, have to have that kind of capacity. Without that kind of capacity, it’s extremely difficult to manage a high level of performance because you’re going to get a lot of extraneous material chipping away at the finery of your thinking or the finery of your motor execution. – Antonio Damasio • People who hate in concrete terms are dangerous. People who manage to hate only in abstracts are the ones worth having for your friends. – John Brunner • Photography is a great adventure in thinking and looking, a wonderful magic toy that miraculously manages to combine our adult awareness with the fairy-tale world of childhood, a never-ending journey through great and small, through variations and the realm of illusions and appearances, a labyrinthine and specular place of multitudes and simulation.- Luigi Ghirri • Practice Golden-Rule 1 of Management in everything you do. Manage others the way you would like to be managed. – Brian Tracy • Russia and the United States are the biggest nuclear powers, this leaves us with an extra special responsibility. By the way, we manage to deal with it and work together in certain fields, particularly in resolving the issue of the Iranian nuclear programme. We worked together and we achieved positive results on the whole. – Vladimir Putin • Separating is not divorcing. Please keep that in mind. It is, instead, the second step in seeing if there’s a better way to manage your family. – Carolyn Hax • So if somebody has chronic pain, we want to manage the pain, but we still want to treat the insomnia separately. So what we’ll tend to do in our sleep lab is we’ll do a thorough evaluation and we usually have myself, who is a Psychologist and a Sleep Behavioral Sleep Specialist, I treat the patients first. – Shelby Harris • So if we can’t express it or repress it, what do we do when we feel angry? The answer is to recognize the anger, but choose to respond to the situation differently. Easier said than done, right? Can you actually imagine trying to strong-arm your anger into another, more amicable feeling? It would never work. Determination alone won’t work. It takes a new intelligence to understand and manage our emotions. By getting your head and heart in coherence and allowing the heart’s intelligence to work for you, you can have a realistic chance of transforming your anger in a healthy way. – Doc Childre • So many awful things have happened in Karachi, it’s true. It has its own crazy rhythm. Even as crazy as other news is in Pakistan, the city manages to beat that in the frequency of catastrophes. – Steve Inskeep • So many of the conscious and unconscious ways men and women treat each other have to do with romantic and sexual fantasies that are deeply ingrained, not just in society but in literature. The women’s movement may manage to clean up the mess in society, but I don’t know whether it can ever clean up the mess in our minds. – Nora Ephron • Someday there is going to be a book about a middle-aged man with a good job, a beautiful wife and two lovely children who still manages to be happy. – Bill Vaughan • Someday, when I manage to finally figure out how to take care of myself, then I’ll consider taking care of someone else. – Marilyn Manson • South Africa now needs skilled and educated people to say ‘How do we manage and develop this democratic country?’ – Thabo Mbeki • Take the self-driving car and the smartphone and put those together and think about how to manage a smart grid because suddenly you have all of this data coming from those two mechanisms that allow for a much higher level of allocating energy much more efficiently. – Jonathon Keats • Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. – Erica Jong • That’s a rather flippant quote “drinking and writing bad poetry” from me. I mean, I said it, but I was doing other stuff too. I certainly didn’t manage the full stretch of four years. – Dylan Moran • That’s where I got the idea to paint the walls of the gallery with varied colours [at the Whitechapel show]. I tried to figure out how all these Renaissance paintings manage to work together. – Nan Goldin • The best people know that there are two phases in every crisis: the one where you manage it and the other where you learn from it. To succeed you have to do both – Mark McCormack • The building housing America’s military brass is a five-sided pentagon, but somehow, the people in it still manage to make it the squarest place on earth. The latest evidence? A current military document that lists homosexuality as a mental disorder in the same league as mental retardation – noting, of course, the one difference: retarded people can still get into heaven. – Jon Stewart • The challenge is to manage creative people so that the output is fruitful. The challenge is not to have an open environment and simply let them do whatever they want. – John Kao • The city is better because the city has an economy of needs and once you’re talking about a city, maybe you can start talking about how you manage the climate of that city as a whole. Not by putting a dome over it but by more passive means that can potentially be put together in creative ways. – Jonathon Keats • The conventional definition of management is getting work done through people, but real management is developing people through work. – Agha Hasan Abedi • The divide between me and the modern world is growing further because I to a larger degree manage to rid myself of my dependence on the modern world. If the modern world collapsed tomorrow I would be fine, and I see so many others who would not be. – Varg Vikernes • The emerging church movement has come to believe that the ultimate context of the spiritual aspirations of a follower of Jesus Christ is not Christianity but rather the kingdom of God. … to believe that God is limited to it would be an attempt to manage God. If one holds that Christ is confined to Christianity, one has chosen a god that is not sovereign. Soren Kierkegaard argued that the moment one decides to become a Christian, one is liable to idolatry. – Samir Selmanovic • The fastest growing segment of the population in the world right now is over the age of 90, and in some cases over the age of 100 in some countries. So people are living longer. And even though much of it is attributed to modern medicine, it’s not. It’s lifestyle. It’s nutrition. It’s the quality of exercise, the ability to manage stress. – Deepak Chopra • The Germans take quite a knock for the holocaust, but the Catholic church manages to push more people into death, disease, and degradation every year than the holocaust managed in its entire show. And it’s thought rather crass to even mention the fact. It seems to me that as long as these Catholic bishops can show their face in public that we are in complicity with mass murder. – Terence McKenna • The idea that the United States of American might shut down its government over abortion and funding to an organization that is 0.01% of the U.S. budget seems completely insane. Anyone looking at this debate around the world is thinking ‘What is this country doing? They have three wars going on, they’re trying to manage major problems and they’re thinking of shutting down their government over abortion?’ – Katty Kay • The job of the president of the United States is not to love his wife; it’s to manage a wide range of complicated issues. – Matthew Yglesias • The madman theory can work, but it only works if it’s strategic. And I think one of the problems that President Trump faces is people don’t really know how much strategy is here and how much is he just sort of talking off the top of his head. And I think North Korea is a really classic case of a potentially insoluble problem, a problem that you have to manage. – E. J. Dionne • The majority of short term trading results are just random. In the long term the money ends up with those that can trade and manage risk. – Steve Burns • The manager does things right; the leader does the right thing. – Warren G. Bennis • The number one key to success in life is to master your own state. If you can manage and master your states, there’s nothing you can’t do. – Tony Robbins • The odd thing is that Trump’s hand movements don’t seem to coordinate with the topic at hand. Most pols manage to make their hand movements correspond with the message, so a slash will accompany emphasis, etc. Trump’s got about three moves, the most notable of which is his “okay” gesture, making a circle with his thumb and forefinger. Anyway, Trump has only a few gestures, including that one, and to my eye he uses them seemingly indiscriminately. I’ve seen him use the “okay/f.u.” sign to be pedantic. – Gene Weingarten • The one thing you can do for others is the manage your own life. And do it with conviction. – Tony Robbins • The person that takes over needs to have the skills to manage that … I believe Andrea [Leadsom] has the edge. – Iain Duncan Smith • The question arose, how would the communities manage this land on their own. That’s why the Communal Land Rights Bill then borrows an institution that is set up in terms of the role and function and powers of the institutional traditional leadership ( borrows that committee and uses that committee). – Thabo Mbeki • The signs of outstanding leadership appear primarily among the followers. Are the followers reaching their potential? Are they learning? Serving? Do they achieve the required results? Do they change with – grace? Manage conflict? – Max De Pree • The silliest woman can manage a clever man; but it needs a very clever woman to manage a fool. – Rudyard Kipling • The stability of the rate is the main issue and the Central Bank manages to ensure it one way or another. This was finally achieved after the Central Bank switched to a floating national currency exchange rate. – Vladimir Putin • The State is a professional apparatus that sets itself apart from the people and apart from the institutions that the people themselves create. It’s a monopoly on violence that manages and institutionalizes social activities. The people are perfectly capable of managing themselves and creating their own institutions. – Murray Bookchin • The thing about Hitchcock is that, however much one dissects him, he still manages to hang onto his mystery. You can never quite get to the bottom of him. – Julian Jarrold • The traditional model for a company like Coca-Cola is to hire one big advertising agency and essentially outsource all of its creativity in that area. But Coca-Cola does not do it that way. It knows how to manage creative people and creative teams and it has been quite adept at building a network that includes the Creative Artists Agency in Hollywood, which is a talent agency. – John Kao • The way in which we manage the business of getting and spending is closely tied to our personal philosophy of living. We begin to develop this philosophy long before we have our first dollar to spend; and unless we are thinking people, our attitude toward money management may continue through the years to be tinged with the ignorance and innocence of childhood. – Catherine Crook de Camp • There are a lot of actors who are doing dream work where they focus on a role and try to bring it into their dreams. I haven’t done that work, but I’ve always found that when I’m studying for a role, the work I’m doing somehow manages to enter my dreams, no matter what approach I take. – Luke Kirby • There are fewer and fewer philosophies that everyone subscribes to. We don’t seem to have as many beliefs in common as we used to. Also, we interact much more online. We have all these gadgets to help us manage different aspects of our lives. – Elaine Equi • There are so many items that are not in the copyright domain. And people might not realize the Library of Congress manages the copyright process for the nation. – Carla Hayden • There are still many, many uncertainties, challenges and difficulties in Afghanistan. But we have to enable the Afghans to manage those challenges themselves. We cannot solve all the problems for the Afghans. – Jens Stoltenberg • There is no doubt that we need to manage migration better.Migrants are always getting the blame for politicians. – Sadiq Khan • There is the fact that – people have had a lot of confidence that the Chinese leadership could fix what is wrong with their economy so it wouldn’t have ripple effects around the world. I think that confidence is being shaken by how difficult it is for them to manage their stock market and their currency. – David Wessel • There must be a very clear understanding that you cannot work for peace if you are not ready to struggle. And this is the very meaning of jihad: to manage your intention to get your inner peace when it comes to the spiritual journey. In our society, that means face injustice and hypocrisy, face the dictators, the exploiters, the oppressors if you want to free the oppressed, if you want peace based on justice. – Tariq Ramadan • Therefore, when you see the end result, it’s difficult to see who’s the director, me or them. Ultimately, everything belongs to the actors – we just manage the situation. – Abbas Kiarostami • There’s a reductiveness to photography, of course – in the framing of reality and the exclusion of chunks of it (the rest of the world, in fact). It’s almost as if the act of photography bears some relationship to how we consciously manage the uncontrollable set of possibilities that exist in life. – Philip-Lorca diCorcia • There’s always going to be a tradeoff between trolling and anonymity, and I guess that’s the way life will be. And you can manage it, but you can’t cure it. – Tim Wu • There’s not much room for deviation, yet if you manage to crack it, there then you can express things that actually do sound unique and genuinely original. – Rob Brown • These New York City streets get colder, I shoulder every burden every disadvantage I’ve learned to manage. I don’t have a gun to brandish. I walk these streets famished. – Lin-Manuel Miranda • They [people from the Donald Trump cabinet] haven’t had experience in the areas that they’re being asked to manage in a very complicated world and a very complicated government. – Claire McCaskill • This and the small sample size inevitably leads to stereotypes – sweeping family sagas from India, ‘lush’ colonial romances from South-East Asia. Mother and daughter reconciling generational differences through preparing a ‘traditional’ meal together. Geishas. And even if something more exciting does manage to sneak through, it gets the same insultingly clichéd cover slapped on it anyway, so no one will ever know. – Deborah Smith • Those who are not schooled and practised in truth [who are not honest and upright men] can never manage aright the government, nor yet can those who spend their lives as closet philosophers; because the former have no high purpose to guide their actions, while the latter keep aloof from public life. – Plato • Time can’t be managed. I merely manage activities. Each night, I write down on a sheet of paper a list of the things I have to accomplish the next day. And when I wake up … I do them. – Earl Nightingale • Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. – William Penn • Time management is the key. Although it seems hectic, as long as you manage your time properly you can get everything done. – John Cena • To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that we can intelligently direct our emotional energies and intentions…. It’s time for human beings to grow up emotionally, to mature into emotionally managed and responsible citizens. No magic pill will do it. – Doc Childre • Too much of the income gains go to too few people, even though all of the stakeholders worked together to make their companies successful. By failing to put enough income into more hands, the GDP grows slower and consumers manage to meet their needs by incurring high levels of debt. – Philip Kotler • Trying to please everyone can be very hard, but, like Shrek or The Simpsons, Robin Hood manages to entertain adults and children at the same time, but in different ways. – Richard Armitage • Until we can manage time, we can manage nothing else. – Peter Drucker • Virtue is the master of talent, talent is the servant of virtue. Talent without virtue is like a house where there is no master and their servant manages its affairs. How can there be no mischief? – Zicheng Hong • We almost manage to forget that things happen that we don’t anticipate. – Anna Quindlen • We are never really in control. We just think we are when things happen to be going our way. – Byron Katie • We are pretty tough in saying for example if you’ve got unsecured debts and less than £25,000 that should not be an excuse for repossessing someone’s home.That should not be allowed.You have got to help manage people through this process. I don’t want to pretend that it is going to be easy getting out of Gordon Brown’s hole. – George Osborne • We can easily manage if we will only take, each day, the burden appointed to it. But the load will be too heavy for us if we carry yesterday’s burden over again today, and then add the burden of the morrow before we are required to bear it. – John Newton • We get brilliant results from average people managing brilliant processes – while our competitors get average or worse results from brilliant people managing broken processes – Fujio Cho • We need to learn how to love each other. If we cannot do that, then we need to learn to respect one another. If we can’t manage to do that, then we must learn to tolerate each other. – Yanni • We tend to think of orphans as being the protagonist of stories we read when we’re kids, and yet here you are: you’re an adult, you’re supposed to manage, you’re supposed to get over it, you’re supposed to go on with your life, and you feel like a lost child. – Sandra Cisneros • Well advice people have told me that is that, “If people aren’t suing you, you haven’t made it,” which I don’t necessarily believe but with greater success comes greater responsibility and being one of the few female entrepreneurs who I think has been as public as I have been, you’re definitely under a spotlight. It’s difficult to manage. – Sophia Amoruso • What I love about Coulson is that he manages to do that and he manages to wrangle the diva superheroes, and really keep a sense of humor about it. And, you can tell that he really loves his job. – Clark Gregg • What is a good man? Simply one whose life is useful to the world. And a bad man is simply one whose life is harmful to others. There are, however, those who are harmful and yet enjoy a good reputation, and who manage to profit by a show of usefulness. These are the worst of all. – Zhang Zhao • What we face is a comprehensive contraction of our activities, due to declining fossil fuel resources and other growing scarcities. Our failure is the failure to manage contraction. It requires a thoroughgoing reorganization of daily life. No political faction currently operating in the USA gets this. Hence, it is liable to be settled by a contest for dwindling resources and there are many ways in which this won’t be pretty. – James Howard Kunstler • When a novelist manages to describe or evoke something you thought or felt, without realizing that other people also found themselves in the same situation and had the same feelings, it creates that same solidarity. Maybe it’s better to think of humor not as a tool to express the solidarity, but a kind of by-product. Maybe the realization “I’m not on my own on this one” is always, or often, funny. – Elif Batuman • When I manage to keep my center, it’s usually because I’ve taken prayer seriously. – Jonathan Jackson • When it comes to trying to manage how our entire planet-wide market and all the people and businesses in it deal with nature and our natural resources – we first and foremost need to change the incentives. – Ramez Naam • When you are wanting to comfort someone in their grief take the words ‘at least’ out of your vocabulary. In saying them you minimise someone else’s pain…Don’t take someone else’s grief and try to put it in a box that YOU can manage. Learn to truly grieve with others for as long as it may take. – Kay Warren • When you manage to express something with a look and the music instead of saying it with words or having the character speak, I think it’s a more complete work. – Sergio Leone • Whenever I go to New York I try to soak up as much live music as I can, including as many nights at the opera as I can manage. – Garth Greenwell • Whores have the ability to put up with behaviors other women would never manage to put up with. That’s why we deserve to be generously compensated. – Annie Sprinkle • With just a little education and practice on how to manage your emotions, you can move into a new experience of life so rewarding that you will be motivated to keep on managing your emotional nature in order to sustain it. The payoff is delicious in terms of improved quality of life. – Doc Childre • Without change there is no innovation, creativity, or incentive for improvement. Those who initiate change will have a better opportunity to manage the change that is inevitable. – William Pollard • Women are the real superheroes because they’re not just working. They have a life and everything. I’m super lucky because I come home and I don’t have to run errands and clean the house and do all that. Some women have all of this to do, too. And they manage and they live longer. How we do that, I don’t know. – Vanessa Paradis • World events do not occur by accident. They are made to happen, whether it is to do with national issues or commerce; and most of them are staged and managed by those who hold the purse strings. – Denis Healey • Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation. – Graham Greene • You cannot manage a decision you haven’t made. – John C. Maxwell • You can’t grow long-term if you can’t eat short-term. Anybody can manage short. Anybody can manage long. Balancing those two things is what management is. – Jack Welch • You can’t manage [country] the way you would manage a family business. – Barack Obama • You can’t manage creativity. You need to manage for creativity. You need to create the space for it to emerge. – Arianna Huffington • You can’t really micro-manage. You’ll never make the movie in 52 days, if you micro-manage. If you do that, you take the creativity away from people because people just really quickly become disinterested when they’re always being told how to do it. – Janusz Kaminski • You have a job but you don’t always have job security, you have your own home but you worry about mortgage rates going up, you can just about manage but you worry about the cost of living and the quality of the local school because there is no other choice for you.rankly, not everybody in Westminster understands what it’s like to live like this and some need to be told that it isn’t a game. – Theresa May • You have to learn to deal with your own, for want of a better word, insecurities, fears. They don’t go away. And that’s normal. It’s human. You don’t ever really want to lose that. What you want to do is learn to manage it and to work with yourself. But there’s a part of you that has anticipation and fear. And so the important thing to know is that there’s nothing wrong with that and that that’s normal. You have to learn how to deal with it, certainly, but it doesn’t keep you from doing it. And that doesn’t go away ever. – Annette Bening • You know how some people will say to writers, “Why don’t you just write a romance novel that sells a bunch of copies and then you’ll have the money to do the kind of writing you want to do”? I always say that I don’t have the skills or knowledge to do that. It would be just as hard for me to do that kind of writing as it would be to learn how to do any number of productive careers that I can’t manage to make myself do. – Lucy Corin • You manage things and lead people. – Grace Hopper • You manage things, you lead people. We went overboard on management and forgot about leadership. It might help if we ran the MBAs out of Washington. – Grace Hopper • You must manage yourself before you can lead someone else. – Zig Ziglar • You’re directing a movie, but you are at the head of a ship of people, a whole fleet of people. And being able to manage that – being able to handle yourself as a director being a leader – that’s massively important. – Idris Elba • Your vision will be clearer only when you manage to see within your heart. – Carl Jung • You’re faced with creation, you’re faced with something very mysterious and very mystical, whether it’s looking at the ocean or being alone in a forest, or sometimes looking at the stars. There’s really something very powerful about nature that’s endlessly mysterious and a reminder of our humanity, our mortality, of more existential things that we usually manage to not get involved with very often because of daily activity. – Shirin Neshat

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jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'Manage', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '68', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_manage').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_manage img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); ); • Basically, managing is about influencing action. Managing is about helping organizations and units to get things done, which means action. Sometimes, managers manage actions directly. They fight fires. They manage projects. They negotiate contracts. – Henry Mintzberg • But one thing that we have done in the last four years is we have really put pressure on the leadership of this organization [Al Qaeda]. We have killed a significant number of leaders. We’ve captured others. Those that remain have to look over their shoulders, they have to be on the run. So that even if we don’t manage to kill or capture them all within four years, what we do do is put the kind of pressure on them that makes them focus on their own skins, as opposed to carrying out attacks. – Michael Chertoff • By far the hardest decision I’ve had to manage [was about my health]. Because I had 51 years of doing it wrong. – John C. Maxwell • By raising tall trees for windbreaks, citrus underneath, and a green manure cover down on the surface, I have found a way to take it easy and let the orchard manage itself! – Masanobu Fukuoka • Capitalism is the only engine credible enough to generate mass wealth. I think it’s imperfect, but we’re stuck with it. And thank God we have that in the toolbox. But if you don’t manage it in some way that incorporates all of society, if everybody’s not benefiting on some level and you don’t have a sense of shared purpose, national purpose, then it’s just a pyramid scheme. – David Simon • CEOs are no different than the guy in the mailroom. They all have to learn how to manage better the risk created by our increasingly risk-shifting world. – Lewis Schiff • Certainly, if you can’t manage your game, you can’t play tournament golf. You continually have to ask yourself what club to play, where to aim it, whether to accept a safe par or to try to go for a birdie. You can’t play every hole the same way. I never could. – Ben Hogan • Checklists are really helpful ways to remind people around how to manage complicated tasks. – Scott D. Anthony • Deal with just the basic fact: we will never have enough money for lawyers for poor people. So one of our major initiatives has been to develop new technologies that can help people without a lawyer navigate the legal system, and help sort the cases that really need to have a lawyer from those where an individual with some help online, may be able to manage by him or herself. – Martha Minow • Dictatorial regimes often manage to keep themselves in power because they are recognized by foreigners as representing the state and its people, and therefore as entitled to sell the country’s natural resources and to borrow money in its people’s name. These privileges conferred by foreigners keep autocrats in power despite the fact that they were not elected and do not rule in the interest of the population. – Thomas Pogge • Donald Trump has stated that his three older children will manage his business once he enters office. – Rachel Martin • Donald Trump is a – the owner of a lot of real estate that he manages, he may well pay no income taxes. We know for a fact that he didn’t pay any income taxes in 1978, 1979, 1984, 1992 and 1994. We know because of the reports of the New Jersey Casino Control Commission. We don’t know about any year after that. – Hillary Clinton • Donald Trump manages to personalize everything. He brings chaos. He will not admit that he’s ever made a mistake, that he’s ever been wrong. – Mark Shields • Drug addiction is an incredibly difficult challenge to manage on one’s own. When I think of all the stories I’ve heard from people, the common denominator is that they all were ultimately able to find somebody who was willing to support them. Maybe it was someone they knew, like a parent or a sibling or a friend; other times it was a treatment center with a compassionate staff who didn’t give up on them. That made all the difference. – Vivek Murthy • Earning a lot of money is not the key to prosperity. How you handle it is. – Dave Ramsey • Egypt’s priorities in fact are all related to the environment: food, water, health, energy, employment and education. Egypt is facing some very serious environmental challenges. The country has limited natural resources and has to decide how to manage these to meet the needs of a growing population. – Mindy Baha El Din • Either you run the day or the day runs you. – Jim Rohn • Every time I’ve gone to Brazil I’ve gotten sick upon return. You know, it’s just a different situation there. And I take every precaution – eating cooked foods and staying away from tap water, brushing my teeth with bottled water – and yet I still manage to get sick. So I’m just going to stay on point, bring my probiotics. – Kerri Walsh • Everybody wants to manage me; management is a touchy situation. – Boi-1da • Everything considered, a determined soul will always manage. – Albert Camus • For me, what was important was to record everything I saw around me, and to do this as methodically as possible. In these circumstances a good photograph is a picture that comes as close as possible to reality. But the camera never manages to record what your eyes see, or what you feel at the moment. The camera always creates a new reality. – Alfredo Jaar • For those of us who worry more about working people than about windfall profits for oil companies, it may net out. A better question is: what does it do to our economy if we manage to overheat the earth? This summer’s drought provides a small taste. – Bill McKibben • Freedom is the slogan which speaks to the ears of people who feel strong enough to manage on their own using their own resources, who can do without dependency because they can do without others caring for them. – Zygmunt Bauman • Generally I still believe that Lewis [Hamilton] is the best champion that we have had in a long, long time. He manages to get to all different walks of life: red carpet, fashion business, and music – you name it. – Bernie Ecclestone • Good design successfully manages the tensions between user needs, technology feasibility, and business viability. – Tim Brown • Google has already tested robot cars in San Francisco. If they can navigate San Francisco, they can probably manage just about anywhere. – Norman Foster • Harvard has something that manages, I think, to provide a lot of options for students, but still fairly prescriptive about the kinds of subjects that the courses ought to cover. – Louis Menand • Having inborn capabilities doesn’t matter. Whether you can manage them or not, that’s what determines the victory or defeat. – Hong Jin-joo • History reports that the men who can manage men manage the men who can manage only things, and the men who can manage money manage all. – Will Durant • However, we need to participate and manage skillfully, helpfully, and harmoniously, for a better world, family and society to be possible. So everybody’s spiritual by nature I believe, not that they necessarily have to be religious. Everybody wants, or cares about, and has values even if they don’t talk about them all the time explicitly, like some noisy preachers do with their foghorn voices and dogmatic views. – Surya Das • Humans are really interesting. We’re so clever, what we do with our brain. How we manage to con ourselves into thinking all sorts of things is really fascinating. By the same token, if we could just convince ourselves of things that would gather us together and powerfully turn things around for the good, that would be awesome. It’s doubtful because we’re such a fear-based species. – Thandie Newton • I always tried to manage my money smart. – Rakim • I am inspired by working moms. Mothers who somehow balance the demands of their many lives – professional, familial, personal, and interior – and still manage to make time to have fun and invest in themselves! This is a huge challenge that I look forward to taking on. – Daphne Oz • I believe in the not-too-distant future, people are going to learn to trust their information to the Net more than they now do, and be able to essentially manage very large amounts and perhaps their whole lifetime of information in the Net with the notion that they can access it securely and privately for as long as they want, and that it will persist over all the evolution and technical changes. – Robert E. Kahn • I can’t manage without homeopathy. In fact, I never go anywhere without homeopathic remedies. – Paul McCartney • I care deeply about Democratic party and our agenda and making sure that we can continue to build on President [Barack] Obama`s legacy. So any suggestion that I am doing anything other than manage this primary impartially and neutrally is ludicrous. – Hillary Clinton • I continued blogging, but between illness and deadlines, did not manage to blog nearly as much as last year. I’m hoping to do better in 2016. – Justine Larbalestier • I didn’t have to do too much “research” or acting to play this guy. (laughs) It is actually very difficult to manage all the time. The Community schedule is crushing and it kills me because I don’t get to be with my family as much as I’d like. – Joel McHale • I do try to be of some use in the world. I sometimes do volunteer work with kids, and manage to help some people a little, but really making a significant difference can be hard. – John Shirley • I don’t have a lot of time for managing [my businesses], so I put a lot of trust in people I hire to manage my businesses. I can’t necessarily attend to [the businesses] while I’m in season. We swap ideas on how we can improve and deliver a better product. – Kamerion Wimbley • I don’t have too many pests. My concept is this: I manage myself, and there’s nothing wrong with people having managers. – Vickie Winans • I don’t think she ever had a single initiative at the United Nations that was not previously [vetted] by the people at the State Department, approved of, and authorized. She did manage to get around the world an awful lot, and find other parts of her vast slum project that needed repair. But I don’t think that that was the main point. The main point was that she, after all, connoted Franklin Roosevelt, who by then was long dead, and had a certain prestige and power on that account. – William A. Rusher • I had a horrible life habit that I had to change. And I think it’s very true, the later we make decisions in life that are important, the harder it is to manage those decisions. – John C. Maxwell • I had never written about what it’s like to live the life of a writer, and I had never read a book that combined talking about the life of writing and how you can do it, how you can stand it, how you can emotionally manage it, with the choices that we all make on the page. – Alice Mattison • I have a seven-level program and through even into the fifth level it can be all done from a distance. “Why not?” is how I feel about it, because energy is not confined by time or space, so why should my teaching be. I’m teaching energy and how to manage it, how to handle it, and how to heal with it. – Deborah King • I have found, without a doubt, that when I manage to get outside myself and not make myself the center, I’m always taken care of in whatever situation I’m in, even if I’m slow to recognize it. It’s counterintuitive thinking on some level and not consistently easy to do. – Patrick Fabian • I have to kind of like switch heads. Sometimes I manage it seamlessly, and other times I feel rather all over the place. I feel a bit schizophrenic, like I have a split personality. – Emma Watson • I know a lot of people in Washington would say, well, you know, indigent people can’t manage their health savings account. They’re too stupid. But they’re not too stupid. Somebody has a diabetic foot ulcer, they learn very quickly not to go the emergency room where it costs five times more to take care of it. They go to the clinic. – Benjamin Carson • I no longer think that learning how to manage people, especially subordinates, is the most important for executives to learn. I am teaching above all else, how to manage oneself. – Peter Drucker • I remember once reading that it is still not understood how the giraffe manages to pump an adequate blood supply all the way up to its head; but it is hard to imagine that anyone would conclude tht giraffes do not have long necks. At least not anyone who had ever been to a zoo – Robert Solow • I said, I’ll put on weight. And I started having massages, taking cod-liver oil, and eating twice as much. But I didn’t even gain an ounce. I’d made up my mind that on the day the engagement was announced I’d be fatter, and I didn’t gain an ounce. Then I went to Mussoorie, which is a health resort, and I ignored the doctors’ instructions; I invented my own regime and gained weight. Just the opposite of what I’d like now. Now I have the problem of keeping slim. Still I manage. I don’t know if you realize I’m a determined woman. – Indira Gandhi • I say the elite looks out of touch because it’s kind of saying; look we’ll manage all this for you. You know, we know best. We’ll sort it all out for you. And then because people believe that doesn’t meet their case for change and they want real change, social media and the way the relationship between people can come into a sense of belonging very quickly, that then is itself a revolutionary phenomenon. You see this around the world. – Tony Blair • I say this ironically, not because I favor the State, but because people are not in the state of mind right now where they feel that they can manage themselves. We have to go through an educational process – which does not involve, in my opinion, compromises with the State. But if the State disappeared tomorrow by accident, and the police disappeared and the army disappeared and the government agencies disappeared, the ironical situation is that people would suddenly feel denuded. – Murray Bookchin • I say, make the decision, and as soon as you make the decision, the rest of your life you just manage that decision on a daily basis. – John C. Maxwell • I talk about my daily dozen in the book [ Today Matters]. Twelve things that are certainly attainable by any of us that we need to manage every day. – John C. Maxwell • I think a lot of women are incredibly tough and they’re just really admirable. Especially the way that, given what they’ve got, they just manage to carry on. – Jo Brand • I think being able to sit in the shoes of a woman and being able to manage products that are mostly sold to women, alongside a lot of female employees, is really helpful because you hold that empathy to the situation. You can understand where the customer is coming from. – Maureen Chiquet • I think everybody plays a role in their own aging. Some people accelerate it. Some people slow it down. Some people manage to reverse it. It all depends on how much you are invested in the hypnosis of our social condition. So if you believe that at a certain age you have to die and you become dysfunctional, then you will. – Deepak Chopra • I think I may drop dead on the stage someday. I hate to think of it. But it’s getting tough on me, the travel. The show, I somehow manage to rise up to it, you know. But I have no desire to retire. – Hal Holbrook • I think Pep Guardiola is a top manager. There’s no doubt about that. Not only did he manage Messi and Iniesta, but he made them better and took them to levels they’d never been before. The best team I’ve ever seen is Pep Guardiola’s Barcelona. I’m sure his management got something to do with that.- Jamie Carragher • I think you learn about yourself through experiences – as many of them as you can manage. – Bonnie Fuller • I want as many people to see the show [Hamilton] in its musical theater form as possible before it’s translated, and whether it’s a good act of translation or a bad act of translation, it’s a leap, and very few stage shows manage the leap successfully. – Lin-Manuel Miranda • I wanted to get that scholarship to – a division one scholarship and play ball and go to school for free. And that, to me, was – I was always about getting to that next step. If I could get to that next place, then I could figure out essentially what to do with being in that space and how to manage my time and handle those – handle all the benefits of being in that space in a way that would get me to the next place. – Mahershala Ali • I was just shitty, shitty, shitty with money and I finally, when I really started making money, I had to get somebody to sit down with me and learn how to manage my money. – Miriam Shor • I would say, you have a unique chance of learning more about the game of chess with your computer than Bobby Fischer, or even myself, could manage throughout our entire lives. What is very important is that you will use this power productively and you will not be hijacked by the computer screen. Always keep your personality intact. – Garry Kasparov • I write for anybody struggling to manage their money. – Michelle Singletary • I`m 100 percent impartial. I`m – my responsibility is to manage this primary nominating contest neutrally and fairly. – Hillary Clinton • If America is to compete effectively in world markets, its corporate leaders must strategically position their companies in the right businesses, and then manage their workforces in the right ways. However, the nation has a shortage of business leaders who understand the importance of utilizing human capital to gain competitive advantage, let alone the know-how to do so. In the future, that shortcoming promises to be exacerbated because few business schools today teach aspiring executives how to create the kind of high-involvement organizations. – James O’Toole • If democracy is ever to be threatened, it will not be by revolutionary groups burning government offices and occupying the broadcasting and newspaper offices of the world. It will come from disenchantment, cynicism and despair caused by the realisation that the New World Order means we are all to be managed and not represented. – Tony Benn • If I can learn how to manage myself, why would I give you 20 percent and people are looking for me? It just doesn’t make sense. – Vickie Winans • If we manage to last in spite of everything, it is because our infirmities are so many and so contradictory that they cancel each other out. – Emile M. Cioran • If we offer a prize, so to speak, to anyone who manages to bring a country under his physical control – namely, that they can then sell the country’s resources and borrow in its name – then it’s not surprising that generals or guerrilla movements will want to compete for this prize. But that the prize is there is really not the fault of the insiders. It is the fault of the dominant states and of the system of international law they maintain. – Thomas Pogge • If Wes Anderson has a very strong cast, he can direct the minutia of that story and still manage to have something that lives and breathes. – Susan Sarandon • If you are not consciously directing your life, you will lose your footing and circumstances will decide for you. – Michael Beckwith • If you have a strong business idea, then it is comparatively easy now to get capital. It is a positive thing that increasingly more people want to join the startup bandwagon. However, to build a successful business, focus on creating more value through the product, and direct your efforts on solving real issues. If you manage to build a sustainable product, revenue will follow. A lot of startups fail because they concentrate on incremental innovations, increasing user base, and monetisation before strengthening the core of their business. – Bhavin Turakhia • If you never allow your children to exceed what they can do, how are they ever going to manage adult life – where a lot of it is managing more than you thought you could manage? – Ellen Galinsky • If you pick the right people and give them the opportunity to spread their wings and put compensation as a carrier behind it you almost don’t have to manage them. – Jack Welch • If you want to lead a family/team/organization, learn to lead/manage yourself first. – Bradford Winters • If you want to manage somebody, manage yourself. Do that well and you’ll be ready to stop managing. And start leading. – Mark Gonzales • I’m not a great fan of people who suddenly manage to pull out the whole track sounding perfect from a laptop. That doesn’t feel like any kind of show to me. – Thighpaulsandra • I’m pretty cerebral, so I can occasionally rationalize emotional pain away, but when I can’t, that’s when I start to feel the fire inside take over and somehow manage to power through. – Nathan Parsons • I’m so blessed with my Baby. […] I just want the most normal life possible for him. […] I will manage. I will create that. – Britney Spears • I’m suggesting that principles meant to deal with uncertainty that occurs naturally can be useful to manage the uncertainty that characterizes any new idea. – Scott D. Anthony • I’m working from home a lot. That’s very unusual because I’m away a lot, sometimes working on the other side of the world for long periods of time. So, it’s hard to manage in the sense that I want to be the best dad I can be but it’s almost harder when you have your kids outside the door. – Andy Serkis • In a corporate context, companies have to try very hard to oppose the enticements of conventional wisdom. They must aim for the leaps, which means that companies have to do more than simply manage their knowledge, which is composed of the insights and understandings they already know. They also have to manage the knowledge-generation process. It’s not just about, “Oh, we’re going to create a data warehouse and we are going to invent a computerized filing system to get at all the stuff we know.” – John Kao • In a growing number of states, you’re actually expected to pay back the costs of your imprisonment. Paying back all these fees, fines, and costs may be a condition of your probation or parole. To make matters worse, if you’re one of the lucky few who actually manages to get a job following release from prison, up to 100% of your wages can be garnished to pay back all those fees, fines and court costs. One hundred percent. – Michelle Alexander • In a world where the 2 billionth photograph has been uploaded to Flickr, which looks like an Eggleston picture! How do you deal with making photographs with the tens of thousands of photographs being uploaded to Facebook every second, how do you manage that? How do you contribute to that? What’s the point? – Alec Soth • In the book [Today Matters] I talk about successful people make important decisions early in their life, and then they manage those decisions the rest of their life. – John C. Maxwell • In The Deep End, you have a woman who looks like a J. Crew mother who can manage it all. Then we begin to realize what’s going on inside. Every time I see one of those women stuck at a stoplight with the children in the back of her car, I sort of think, “What have you just done? What’s going on in your life?”. – Tilda Swinton • In trying to address the systemic problem of racial injustice, we would do well to look at abolitionism, because here is a movement of radicals who did manage to effect political change. Despite things that radical movements always face, differences and divisions, they were able to actually galvanize the movement and translate it into a political agenda. – Manisha Sinha • Iraqi Kurds, out of desperate necessity, have forged one of the most watchful and vigilant anti-terrorist communities in the world. Terrorists from elsewhere just can’t operate in that kind of environment. Al Qaeda members who do manage to infiltrate are hunted down like rats. This conservative Muslim society did a better job protecting me from Islamist killers than the U.S. military could do in the Green Zone in Baghdad. – Michael Totten • Isn’t it fascinating that Nazis always manage to adopt the word freedom? – Steig Larsson • It is no exaggeration to say that rising inequality has driven many of the 99 percent into a financial ditch. It also helped spawn the housing bubble that gave us the financial crisis of 2008, the lingering effects of which have forced many OWS protesters to try to launch their careers in by far the most inhospitable labor market we’ve seen since the Great Depression. Even those recent graduates who manage to find jobs will suffer a lifelong penalty in reduced wages. – Robert H. Frank • It is well known that you can only manage what you measure, and as this is the job of professional accountants, it means they have huge influence on companies’ governance. – Kofi Annan • It would be horrible to be micro-managed! I don’t think directors can really micro-manage people. It’s just impossible. – Janusz Kaminski • It’s all matter of attitude. You could let a lot of things bother you if you wanted to But it’s pretty much the same anywhere you go, you can manage. – Haruki Murakami • It’s also so cool to be able to develop the talent to be able to jump and control the motorcycle which is a very fun thing to do but it’s hard to manage the two. It’s so easy to get hurt, and that’s the last thing I want to do. – Jeff Hardy • It’s difficult to feel silly and depressed at the same time, but I manage. – Dov Davidoff • It’s important to know how to lead and manage a classroom with flexibility. Students of all ages are quite capable of learning these routines and contributing to their success once the teacher is comfortable guiding students in that direction. – Carol Ann Tomlinson • It’s important to wake up everyday and remind yourself what you’re working towards. You create your own life, it’s not set out there for you. – Shay Mitchell • It’s like learning to fall properly. If you can manage not to tighten up you won’t hurt yourself as much. The same theory applies to your day, physically and emotionally. The tensions simply can’t take hold. – Diane von Furstenberg • It’s the people that ultimately are less talented or have less confidence in what they’re doing that then try to micro-manage, which lends itself to a less than ideal film. – Ari Graynor • Just listen to what Mr. [Donald] Trump has to say and make your own judgment with respect to how confident you feel about his ability to manage things like our nuclear triad. – Barack Obama • Let me just say you could end this violence within a very short period of time, have a complete ceasefire – which Iran could control, which Russia could control, which Syria could control, and which we and our coalition friends could control – if one man would merely make it known to the world that he doesn’t have to be part of the long-term future; he’ll help manage Syria out of this mess and then go off into the sunset, as most people do after a period of public life. If he were to do that, then you could stop the violence and quickly move to management. – John F. Kerry • Liberating is a gay word, so let’s phrase it this way: I know everything about me and still manage to be good friends with myself, so nothing anyone says that’s truthful about me ever bothers me. – Jim Goad • Like any working mother, I have to balance and manage my time very carefully. My children and husband come first, of course, then my work. – Andrea Davis Pinkney • Look at the history of the printing press, when this was invented what sort of consequences this had. Or industrialization, what sort of consequences that had. Very often, it led to enormous transformational processes within individual societies. And it took awhile until societies learned how to find the right kind of policies to contain this and manage and steer this. – Angela Merkel • Manage the dream: Create a compelling vision, one that takes people to a new place, and then translate that vision into a reality. – Warren G. Bennis • Management is efficiency in climbing the ladder of success; leadership determines whether the ladder is leaning against the right wall. – Stephen Covey • Managing brands is going to be more and more about trying to manage everything that your company does. – Lee Clow • Managing risk is a key variable, frankly, all aspects of life, business is just one of them, and one of the things that most people do in terms of managing risk, that’s actually bad thinking, is they think they can manage risk to zero. Everything has some risk to it. You know, you drive your car down the street, a drunk driver may hit you. So what you’re doing is you’re actually trying to get to an acceptable level of risk. – Reid Hoffman • Many people who gain recognition and fame shape their lives by overcoming seemingly insurmountable obstacles, only to be catapulted into new social realities over which they have less control and manage badly. Indeed, the annals of the famous and infamous are strewn with individuals who were both architects and victims of their life courses. – Albert Bandura • Margaret Thatcher – a woman I greatly admire – once said that she was not content to manage the decline of a great nation. Neither am I. I am prepared to lead the resurgence of a great nation. – Carly Fiorina • Michelle Obama is a powerful example of someone who has learned how to align her actions with her values, manage boundaries across domains of life, and embrace change courageously. – Stewart D. Friedman • Money is a big part of your life, and when you learn how to get your finances under control, all areas of your life will soar. – T. Harv Eker • More than print and ink, a newspaper is a collection of fierce individualists who somehow manage to perform the astounding daily miracle of merging their own personalities under the discipline of the deadline and retain the flavor of their own minds in print. – Arthur Ochs Sulzberger • My belief is that there will be very large numbers of Internet-enabled devices on the Net – home appliances, office equipment, things in the car and maybe things that you carry around. And since they’re all on the Internet and Internet-enabled, they’ll be manageable through the network, and so we’ll see people using the Net and applications on the Net to manage their entertainment systems, manage their, you know, office activities and maybe even much of their social lives using systems on the Net that are helping them perform that function. – Vinton Cerf • My daughters have strong personalities. I’m close to them but they don’t really need me to advise them on how to manage their lives and they don’t ask me to do that. – Bernie Ecclestone • My occupation has been a great deal with David Foster Wallace, and he didn’t manage it, and he was very much looking for something that isn’t totally selfish, and finding meaning. It’s a struggle. – Tom Courtenay • n truth, we don’t know a whole lot of what Simeon North did. He did manage to match John Hall’s ability to make interchangeable parts, but it’s not clear how much of that came from Hall and how much was original with North. – Charles R. Morris • Now each race is different every time because it’s a different journey to get to it – the difficulties you faced getting the car into that position. I manage myself. I chose my team myself. So there’s a huge satisfaction for me. – Lewis Hamilton • Now we’re in a very different economy. Throughout the late 1980s and 1990s American management started to do the right things. There was extraordinary investment in technology. The dominant questions now are less how to do it better, how to manage better, how to make the economy better, than how to have fuller and more meaningful lives. Because the irony is, now that we’ve come through this great transition, even though our organizations and our people are extraordinarily productive, many feel that the nonwork side of life is very thin. – Robert Reich • Now what I do is I manage that decision. And I teach them in the book how – know what decision to make and then how to manage those decisions. It’s a very – it’s a personal growth book [Today Matters]; that’s what it is. – John C. Maxwell • Now, the situation is much worse in Indonesia than 10 years ago. It is because then, there was still some hope. The progressive Muslim leader Abdurrahman Wahid, was alive and so was Pramoedya Ananta Toer. Mr Wahid, a former President of Indonesia, was a closet Socialist. He was deposed by a judicial coup constructed by the Indonesian elites and military, but many Indonesians still believed that he would manage to make a comeback. – Andre Vltchek • Nowadays, we have to deal with so many more factors that weren’t there in the past. It’s not enough to be a good rider, if you want to finish at the front. The riders have become incredible athletes. In the past, you could manage the race and fight only on the last laps. Now you need to train hard. You cannot allow yourself to go on track without being at 100 percent. – Valentino Rossi • Of course some people manage to write books really young and publish really young. But for most writers, it takes several years because you have to apprentice yourself to the craft, and you also have to grow up. I think maturity is connected to one’s ability to write well. – Cheryl Strayed • One of the most difficult things is to get truthful people. Nobody can manage well if they don’t have a lot of mirrors around them that are honest, that tell them what they’re doing is wrong or wrongheaded or misconceived. And in every large bureaucracy on earth, most people are afraid to tell the boss the truth. – Robert Reich • Oppressors do not get to be oppressors in a single sweep. They manage it because little by little, we make them that. We overlook too much in the beginning and wonder why we lost control in the end. – Joan D. Chittister • Our conscious minds are rapidly overwhelmed with the few tasks that they attempt to manage. That’s why our unconscious minds have evolved to handle so much of our thinking. – Nick Morgan • Our government is operating within an unprecedented revenue shortfall and that we have an obligation to all citizens of the province to manage our finances responsibly. And that’s what we’re going to do. – Rachel Notley • People always ask, “How do you get in the mind of the teen reader?” I think all human beings have these common threads. We struggle with the same things. We desire love and attachment. We have to sort out how much we want to be attached and be independent, how we manage need and being needed and being hurt. These are things that begin when we’re – how old? Then in those teen years we start to really feel them. – Deb Caletti • People are looking for some means of control and what that means is is that the politics in all of our countries is gonna require us to manage technology and global integration and all these demographic shifts in a way that makes people feel more control, that gives them more confidence in their future. – Barack Obama • People seem able to love their dogs with an unabashed acceptance that they rarely demonstrate with family or friends. The dogs do not disappointment them, or, if they do, the owners manages to forget about it quickly. I want to learn to love people like this, the way I love my dog, with pride and enthusiasm and a complete amnesia for faults. In short, to love others the way my dog loves me. – Ann Patchett • People who are great thinkers, in science or in art, people who are great performers, have to have that kind of capacity. Without that kind of capacity, it’s extremely difficult to manage a high level of performance because you’re going to get a lot of extraneous material chipping away at the finery of your thinking or the finery of your motor execution. – Antonio Damasio • People who hate in concrete terms are dangerous. People who manage to hate only in abstracts are the ones worth having for your friends. – John Brunner • Photography is a great adventure in thinking and looking, a wonderful magic toy that miraculously manages to combine our adult awareness with the fairy-tale world of childhood, a never-ending journey through great and small, through variations and the realm of illusions and appearances, a labyrinthine and specular place of multitudes and simulation.- Luigi Ghirri • Practice Golden-Rule 1 of Management in everything you do. Manage others the way you would like to be managed. – Brian Tracy • Russia and the United States are the biggest nuclear powers, this leaves us with an extra special responsibility. By the way, we manage to deal with it and work together in certain fields, particularly in resolving the issue of the Iranian nuclear programme. We worked together and we achieved positive results on the whole. – Vladimir Putin • Separating is not divorcing. Please keep that in mind. It is, instead, the second step in seeing if there’s a better way to manage your family. – Carolyn Hax • So if somebody has chronic pain, we want to manage the pain, but we still want to treat the insomnia separately. So what we’ll tend to do in our sleep lab is we’ll do a thorough evaluation and we usually have myself, who is a Psychologist and a Sleep Behavioral Sleep Specialist, I treat the patients first. – Shelby Harris • So if we can’t express it or repress it, what do we do when we feel angry? The answer is to recognize the anger, but choose to respond to the situation differently. Easier said than done, right? Can you actually imagine trying to strong-arm your anger into another, more amicable feeling? It would never work. Determination alone won’t work. It takes a new intelligence to understand and manage our emotions. By getting your head and heart in coherence and allowing the heart’s intelligence to work for you, you can have a realistic chance of transforming your anger in a healthy way. – Doc Childre • So many awful things have happened in Karachi, it’s true. It has its own crazy rhythm. Even as crazy as other news is in Pakistan, the city manages to beat that in the frequency of catastrophes. – Steve Inskeep • So many of the conscious and unconscious ways men and women treat each other have to do with romantic and sexual fantasies that are deeply ingrained, not just in society but in literature. The women’s movement may manage to clean up the mess in society, but I don’t know whether it can ever clean up the mess in our minds. – Nora Ephron • Someday there is going to be a book about a middle-aged man with a good job, a beautiful wife and two lovely children who still manages to be happy. – Bill Vaughan • Someday, when I manage to finally figure out how to take care of myself, then I’ll consider taking care of someone else. – Marilyn Manson • South Africa now needs skilled and educated people to say ‘How do we manage and develop this democratic country?’ – Thabo Mbeki • Take the self-driving car and the smartphone and put those together and think about how to manage a smart grid because suddenly you have all of this data coming from those two mechanisms that allow for a much higher level of allocating energy much more efficiently. – Jonathon Keats • Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. – Erica Jong • That’s a rather flippant quote “drinking and writing bad poetry” from me. I mean, I said it, but I was doing other stuff too. I certainly didn’t manage the full stretch of four years. – Dylan Moran • That’s where I got the idea to paint the walls of the gallery with varied colours [at the Whitechapel show]. I tried to figure out how all these Renaissance paintings manage to work together. – Nan Goldin • The best people know that there are two phases in every crisis: the one where you manage it and the other where you learn from it. To succeed you have to do both – Mark McCormack • The building housing America’s military brass is a five-sided pentagon, but somehow, the people in it still manage to make it the squarest place on earth. The latest evidence? A current military document that lists homosexuality as a mental disorder in the same league as mental retardation – noting, of course, the one difference: retarded people can still get into heaven. – Jon Stewart • The challenge is to manage creative people so that the output is fruitful. The challenge is not to have an open environment and simply let them do whatever they want. – John Kao • The city is better because the city has an economy of needs and once you’re talking about a city, maybe you can start talking about how you manage the climate of that city as a whole. Not by putting a dome over it but by more passive means that can potentially be put together in creative ways. – Jonathon Keats • The conventional definition of management is getting work done through people, but real management is developing people through work. – Agha Hasan Abedi • The divide between me and the modern world is growing further because I to a larger degree manage to rid myself of my dependence on the modern world. If the modern world collapsed tomorrow I would be fine, and I see so many others who would not be. – Varg Vikernes • The emerging church movement has come to believe that the ultimate context of the spiritual aspirations of a follower of Jesus Christ is not Christianity but rather the kingdom of God. … to believe that God is limited to it would be an attempt to manage God. If one holds that Christ is confined to Christianity, one has chosen a god that is not sovereign. Soren Kierkegaard argued that the moment one decides to become a Christian, one is liable to idolatry. – Samir Selmanovic • The fastest growing segment of the population in the world right now is over the age of 90, and in some cases over the age of 100 in some countries. So people are living longer. And even though much of it is attributed to modern medicine, it’s not. It’s lifestyle. It’s nutrition. It’s the quality of exercise, the ability to manage stress. – Deepak Chopra • The Germans take quite a knock for the holocaust, but the Catholic church manages to push more people into death, disease, and degradation every year than the holocaust managed in its entire show. And it’s thought rather crass to even mention the fact. It seems to me that as long as these Catholic bishops can show their face in public that we are in complicity with mass murder. – Terence McKenna • The idea that the United States of American might shut down its government over abortion and funding to an organization that is 0.01% of the U.S. budget seems completely insane. Anyone looking at this debate around the world is thinking ‘What is this country doing? They have three wars going on, they’re trying to manage major problems and they’re thinking of shutting down their government over abortion?’ – Katty Kay • The job of the president of the United States is not to love his wife; it’s to manage a wide range of complicated issues. – Matthew Yglesias • The madman theory can work, but it only works if it’s strategic. And I think one of the problems that President Trump faces is people don’t really know how much strategy is here and how much is he just sort of talking off the top of his head. And I think North Korea is a really classic case of a potentially insoluble problem, a problem that you have to manage. – E. J. Dionne • The majority of short term trading results are just random. In the long term the money ends up with those that can trade and manage risk. – Steve Burns • The manager does things right; the leader does the right thing. – Warren G. Bennis • The number one key to success in life is to master your own state. If you can manage and master your states, there’s nothing you can’t do. – Tony Robbins • The odd thing is that Trump’s hand movements don’t seem to coordinate with the topic at hand. Most pols manage to make their hand movements correspond with the message, so a slash will accompany emphasis, etc. Trump’s got about three moves, the most notable of which is his “okay” gesture, making a circle with his thumb and forefinger. Anyway, Trump has only a few gestures, including that one, and to my eye he uses them seemingly indiscriminately. I’ve seen him use the “okay/f.u.” sign to be pedantic. – Gene Weingarten • The one thing you can do for others is the manage your own life. And do it with conviction. – Tony Robbins • The person that takes over needs to have the skills to manage that … I believe Andrea [Leadsom] has the edge. – Iain Duncan Smith • The question arose, how would the communities manage this land on their own. That’s why the Communal Land Rights Bill then borrows an institution that is set up in terms of the role and function and powers of the institutional traditional leadership ( borrows that committee and uses that committee). – Thabo Mbeki • The signs of outstanding leadership appear primarily among the followers. Are the followers reaching their potential? Are they learning? Serving? Do they achieve the required results? Do they change with – grace? Manage conflict? – Max De Pree • The silliest woman can manage a clever man; but it needs a very clever woman to manage a fool. – Rudyard Kipling • The stability of the rate is the main issue and the Central Bank manages to ensure it one way or another. This was finally achieved after the Central Bank switched to a floating national currency exchange rate. – Vladimir Putin • The State is a professional apparatus that sets itself apart from the people and apart from the institutions that the people themselves create. It’s a monopoly on violence that manages and institutionalizes social activities. The people are perfectly capable of managing themselves and creating their own institutions. – Murray Bookchin • The thing about Hitchcock is that, however much one dissects him, he still manages to hang onto his mystery. You can never quite get to the bottom of him. – Julian Jarrold • The traditional model for a company like Coca-Cola is to hire one big advertising agency and essentially outsource all of its creativity in that area. But Coca-Cola does not do it that way. It knows how to manage creative people and creative teams and it has been quite adept at building a network that includes the Creative Artists Agency in Hollywood, which is a talent agency. – John Kao • The way in which we manage the business of getting and spending is closely tied to our personal philosophy of living. We begin to develop this philosophy long before we have our first dollar to spend; and unless we are thinking people, our attitude toward money management may continue through the years to be tinged with the ignorance and innocence of childhood. – Catherine Crook de Camp • There are a lot of actors who are doing dream work where they focus on a role and try to bring it into their dreams. I haven’t done that work, but I’ve always found that when I’m studying for a role, the work I’m doing somehow manages to enter my dreams, no matter what approach I take. – Luke Kirby • There are fewer and fewer philosophies that everyone subscribes to. We don’t seem to have as many beliefs in common as we used to. Also, we interact much more online. We have all these gadgets to help us manage different aspects of our lives. – Elaine Equi • There are so many items that are not in the copyright domain. And people might not realize the Library of Congress manages the copyright process for the nation. – Carla Hayden • There are still many, many uncertainties, challenges and difficulties in Afghanistan. But we have to enable the Afghans to manage those challenges themselves. We cannot solve all the problems for the Afghans. – Jens Stoltenberg • There is no doubt that we need to manage migration better.Migrants are always getting the blame for politicians. – Sadiq Khan • There is the fact that – people have had a lot of confidence that the Chinese leadership could fix what is wrong with their economy so it wouldn’t have ripple effects around the world. I think that confidence is being shaken by how difficult it is for them to manage their stock market and their currency. – David Wessel • There must be a very clear understanding that you cannot work for peace if you are not ready to struggle. And this is the very meaning of jihad: to manage your intention to get your inner peace when it comes to the spiritual journey. In our society, that means face injustice and hypocrisy, face the dictators, the exploiters, the oppressors if you want to free the oppressed, if you want peace based on justice. – Tariq Ramadan • Therefore, when you see the end result, it’s difficult to see who’s the director, me or them. Ultimately, everything belongs to the actors – we just manage the situation. – Abbas Kiarostami • There’s a reductiveness to photography, of course – in the framing of reality and the exclusion of chunks of it (the rest of the world, in fact). It’s almost as if the act of photography bears some relationship to how we consciously manage the uncontrollable set of possibilities that exist in life. – Philip-Lorca diCorcia • There’s always going to be a tradeoff between trolling and anonymity, and I guess that’s the way life will be. And you can manage it, but you can’t cure it. – Tim Wu • There’s not much room for deviation, yet if you manage to crack it, there then you can express things that actually do sound unique and genuinely original. – Rob Brown • These New York City streets get colder, I shoulder every burden every disadvantage I’ve learned to manage. I don’t have a gun to brandish. I walk these streets famished. – Lin-Manuel Miranda • They [people from the Donald Trump cabinet] haven’t had experience in the areas that they’re being asked to manage in a very complicated world and a very complicated government. – Claire McCaskill • This and the small sample size inevitably leads to stereotypes – sweeping family sagas from India, ‘lush’ colonial romances from South-East Asia. Mother and daughter reconciling generational differences through preparing a ‘traditional’ meal together. Geishas. And even if something more exciting does manage to sneak through, it gets the same insultingly clichéd cover slapped on it anyway, so no one will ever know. – Deborah Smith • Those who are not schooled and practised in truth [who are not honest and upright men] can never manage aright the government, nor yet can those who spend their lives as closet philosophers; because the former have no high purpose to guide their actions, while the latter keep aloof from public life. – Plato • Time can’t be managed. I merely manage activities. Each night, I write down on a sheet of paper a list of the things I have to accomplish the next day. And when I wake up … I do them. – Earl Nightingale • Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. – William Penn • Time management is the key. Although it seems hectic, as long as you manage your time properly you can get everything done. – John Cena • To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that we can intelligently direct our emotional energies and intentions…. It’s time for human beings to grow up emotionally, to mature into emotionally managed and responsible citizens. No magic pill will do it. – Doc Childre • Too much of the income gains go to too few people, even though all of the stakeholders worked together to make their companies successful. By failing to put enough income into more hands, the GDP grows slower and consumers manage to meet their needs by incurring high levels of debt. – Philip Kotler • Trying to please everyone can be very hard, but, like Shrek or The Simpsons, Robin Hood manages to entertain adults and children at the same time, but in different ways. – Richard Armitage • Until we can manage time, we can manage nothing else. – Peter Drucker • Virtue is the master of talent, talent is the servant of virtue. Talent without virtue is like a house where there is no master and their servant manages its affairs. How can there be no mischief? – Zicheng Hong • We almost manage to forget that things happen that we don’t anticipate. – Anna Quindlen • We are never really in control. We just think we are when things happen to be going our way. – Byron Katie • We are pretty tough in saying for example if you’ve got unsecured debts and less than £25,000 that should not be an excuse for repossessing someone’s home.That should not be allowed.You have got to help manage people through this process. I don’t want to pretend that it is going to be easy getting out of Gordon Brown’s hole. – George Osborne • We can easily manage if we will only take, each day, the burden appointed to it. But the load will be too heavy for us if we carry yesterday’s burden over again today, and then add the burden of the morrow before we are required to bear it. – John Newton • We get brilliant results from average people managing brilliant processes – while our competitors get average or worse results from brilliant people managing broken processes – Fujio Cho • We need to learn how to love each other. If we cannot do that, then we need to learn to respect one another. If we can’t manage to do that, then we must learn to tolerate each other. – Yanni • We tend to think of orphans as being the protagonist of stories we read when we’re kids, and yet here you are: you’re an adult, you’re supposed to manage, you’re supposed to get over it, you’re supposed to go on with your life, and you feel like a lost child. – Sandra Cisneros • Well advice people have told me that is that, “If people aren’t suing you, you haven’t made it,” which I don’t necessarily believe but with greater success comes greater responsibility and being one of the few female entrepreneurs who I think has been as public as I have been, you’re definitely under a spotlight. It’s difficult to manage. – Sophia Amoruso • What I love about Coulson is that he manages to do that and he manages to wrangle the diva superheroes, and really keep a sense of humor about it. And, you can tell that he really loves his job. – Clark Gregg • What is a good man? Simply one whose life is useful to the world. And a bad man is simply one whose life is harmful to others. There are, however, those who are harmful and yet enjoy a good reputation, and who manage to profit by a show of usefulness. These are the worst of all. – Zhang Zhao • What we face is a comprehensive contraction of our activities, due to declining fossil fuel resources and other growing scarcities. Our failure is the failure to manage contraction. It requires a thoroughgoing reorganization of daily life. No political faction currently operating in the USA gets this. Hence, it is liable to be settled by a contest for dwindling resources and there are many ways in which this won’t be pretty. – James Howard Kunstler • When a novelist manages to describe or evoke something you thought or felt, without realizing that other people also found themselves in the same situation and had the same feelings, it creates that same solidarity. Maybe it’s better to think of humor not as a tool to express the solidarity, but a kind of by-product. Maybe the realization “I’m not on my own on this one” is always, or often, funny. – Elif Batuman • When I manage to keep my center, it’s usually because I’ve taken prayer seriously. – Jonathan Jackson • When it comes to trying to manage how our entire planet-wide market and all the people and businesses in it deal with nature and our natural resources – we first and foremost need to change the incentives. – Ramez Naam • When you are wanting to comfort someone in their grief take the words ‘at least’ out of your vocabulary. In saying them you minimise someone else’s pain…Don’t take someone else’s grief and try to put it in a box that YOU can manage. Learn to truly grieve with others for as long as it may take. – Kay Warren • When you manage to express something with a look and the music instead of saying it with words or having the character speak, I think it’s a more complete work. – Sergio Leone • Whenever I go to New York I try to soak up as much live music as I can, including as many nights at the opera as I can manage. – Garth Greenwell • Whores have the ability to put up with behaviors other women would never manage to put up with. That’s why we deserve to be generously compensated. – Annie Sprinkle • With just a little education and practice on how to manage your emotions, you can move into a new experience of life so rewarding that you will be motivated to keep on managing your emotional nature in order to sustain it. The payoff is delicious in terms of improved quality of life. – Doc Childre • Without change there is no innovation, creativity, or incentive for improvement. Those who initiate change will have a better opportunity to manage the change that is inevitable. – William Pollard • Women are the real superheroes because they’re not just working. They have a life and everything. I’m super lucky because I come home and I don’t have to run errands and clean the house and do all that. Some women have all of this to do, too. And they manage and they live longer. How we do that, I don’t know. – Vanessa Paradis • World events do not occur by accident. They are made to happen, whether it is to do with national issues or commerce; and most of them are staged and managed by those who hold the purse strings. – Denis Healey • Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation. – Graham Greene �� You cannot manage a decision you haven’t made. – John C. Maxwell • You can’t grow long-term if you can’t eat short-term. Anybody can manage short. Anybody can manage long. Balancing those two things is what management is. – Jack Welch • You can’t manage [country] the way you would manage a family business. – Barack Obama • You can’t manage creativity. You need to manage for creativity. You need to create the space for it to emerge. – Arianna Huffington • You can’t really micro-manage. You’ll never make the movie in 52 days, if you micro-manage. If you do that, you take the creativity away from people because people just really quickly become disinterested when they’re always being told how to do it. – Janusz Kaminski • You have a job but you don’t always have job security, you have your own home but you worry about mortgage rates going up, you can just about manage but you worry about the cost of living and the quality of the local school because there is no other choice for you.rankly, not everybody in Westminster understands what it’s like to live like this and some need to be told that it isn’t a game. – Theresa May • You have to learn to deal with your own, for want of a better word, insecurities, fears. They don’t go away. And that’s normal. It’s human. You don’t ever really want to lose that. What you want to do is learn to manage it and to work with yourself. But there’s a part of you that has anticipation and fear. And so the important thing to know is that there’s nothing wrong with that and that that’s normal. You have to learn how to deal with it, certainly, but it doesn’t keep you from doing it. And that doesn’t go away ever. – Annette Bening • You know how some people will say to writers, “Why don’t you just write a romance novel that sells a bunch of copies and then you’ll have the money to do the kind of writing you want to do”? I always say that I don’t have the skills or knowledge to do that. It would be just as hard for me to do that kind of writing as it would be to learn how to do any number of productive careers that I can’t manage to make myself do. – Lucy Corin • You manage things and lead people. – Grace Hopper • You manage things, you lead people. We went overboard on management and forgot about leadership. It might help if we ran the MBAs out of Washington. – Grace Hopper • You must manage yourself before you can lead someone else. – Zig Ziglar • You’re directing a movie, but you are at the head of a ship of people, a whole fleet of people. And being able to manage that – being able to handle yourself as a director being a leader – that’s massively important. – Idris Elba • Your vision will be clearer only when you manage to see within your heart. – Carl Jung • You’re faced with creation, you’re faced with something very mysterious and very mystical, whether it’s looking at the ocean or being alone in a forest, or sometimes looking at the stars. There’s really something very powerful about nature that’s endlessly mysterious and a reminder of our humanity, our mortality, of more existential things that we usually manage to not get involved with very often because of daily activity. – Shirin Neshat

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