#please i am tearing up my walls do yall see my vision?

[comicdez]

Do you think an ambition can have regrets?

+ a quick colored Mark. Bition i just finished today!

[i-like-sparkly-things]

Right in front of you

A Halstead!sister

Jay held a strong grip on your upper arm as he led you out to the school hall. "What the hell was that Y/N? Are you happy now? God.... I can't believe you cheated!" he sneered, "EYES UP HERE Y/N!! "

"I'm sorry" you sighed, locking eyes with Jay, silently praying that he would let this go. It was only one time anyway. It wasn't a big deal.

But he let out a hollow laugh, "Thirty percent, Y/N, THIRTY PERCENT. You're going to have to do better than a half-ass apology. What exactly are you sorry for? Huh? For cheating? Or being caught?"

Requested : Yes by @study-coffee-chicago : They found out she cheated on a test in high school...and Jay's the one who has to pick her up.

Warnings : angry!Jay (lots of it), alcohol, swearing, anxiety attacks

Note : I am so so so sorry this so longg 😭 I ended up so far away from the actual request kayela please don't block mee 😭 butt I've learned alot in writing abt active and passive voices and using more imagery Yayy!! I'm so glad that yall are ok with my grammar thank uu🥺

MASTERLIST HERE

The piles of homework and flashcards you needed to memorize had no end in sight, and now that Will was taking nightshifts along with his usual double shifts, and intelligence was tracking down an underground drug cartel, you spent most days alone, allowing your mind to engulf you.

Every time you sat down to study, you felt a striking pain in your chest. In mere seconds the air was sucked out of your lungs and you found yourself panting, desperate to get oxygen back into your body.

You would be surrounded by books and worksheets and you could swear the walls of your room were closing in towards you, trapping you in a sea of incomplete work.

You failed to follow the schedules and to do lists you had made for yourself. Staring at them, hoping the essays would write themselves.

All you needed, was a break. A moment to relax from anything and everything.

So when your best friend mentioned that her brother used to drink a little before he appeared for an exam, your mind was quick to catch on.

Last night you had borrowed a little bit of beer from Jay's stash of alcohol and took a few sips of it as you studied.

The more you drank, the less bitter it became. It was a weird, new sensation, but it worked nonetheless.

Except now, you were sitting in the girls bathroom at school, ramaging through your notes, trying to recollect what you had learned yesterday.

You saw what you had underlined and highlighted— names in pink and important dates in yellow—but your mind came up blank.

Flipping the pages you saw people in wigs, and castles burning to the ground —None of which you recognized.

A wave of anxiety rippled through you unable to comprehend your next thought —you were going to fail.

Your head was throbbing as you ran a hand down face, massaging your temples trying to calm yourself down.

You took out your water bottle that you had filled with beer and swallowed a few gulps, hoping that it would help you think straight.

You groaned, feeling the sting of alcohol at the back of your throat, popping some mints into your mouth, you ran towards the exam hall.

***

Your foot bounced on the polished wood floors as sweat pooled on your forehead.

You thought you were careful —only taking a peek from your friends answer sheet when Mrs.Ling's back was facing you.

Everything would have worked out if it wasn't for that kid sitting behind you. In a split second your teacher turned around, when he dropped his pen, to see you peering over your partner's desk.

Now you were sitting in the principles office praying that Jay wouldn't be the one picking you up.

You could already imagine his anger at you for pulling him away from his case, only to find you cheated.

Unfortunately luck was not on your side today.

You dare not look at Jay as he entered the office, letting out a huff as he sat down. You could feel the rage emitting him, tension filling the room, as he burned holes looking at you.

"I'll get straight to the point" Your principal started.

"Please" Jay growled, struggling to contain himself. He couldn't believe what he was hearing, when he got the call saying that you had cheated on your midterms.

You and Will were alike,at least he thought so, both good at science and math but weak at geography and history. Nonetheless you continued to secure good grades for the most part.

"Y/n here, was caught cheating from a classmates answer sheet. Our teacher caught her red handed. I truly did not expect this from you. These midterms cost thirty percent of your grade..... "

Pretty soon his voice was muffled like he was getting farther and farther away from you. His figure swayed in front of you as you squinted your eyes to keep him in the center of your vision.

" You are suspended, Mrs halstead"

Your eyes widened , your body choosing the perfect time to bring out what little beer you had taken when you heard those words, letting the alcohol mix with the adrenaline.

"WHAT??!! " Damn, alcohol really bought out your courage as Jay stared at you in shock at your audacity.

"Y/n, your lucky I'm letting you retake the exam. That's only because you've had a clean record so far. I strongly suggest you start preparing early Ms. halstead" your principal said in a firm but monotone voice that left you speechless.

Jay held a strong grip on your upper arm as he led you out to the school hall. "What the hell was that Y/N? Are you happy now? God.... I can't believe you cheated!" he sneered, "EYES UP HERE Y/N!! "

Oh god. Every now and then, the ground would sway beneath you, tiles shifting in your vision. But you counted your steps, carefully putting one foot in front of the other, not wanting Jay to find out what else you had done........ until now.

You tilted your head, only to be met with your brother's piercing stare but little did he know, now it made it infinitely harder to concentrate on your walking.

"I'm sorry" you sighed, locking eyes with Jay, silently praying that he would let this go. It was only one time anyway. It wasn't a big deal.

But he let out a hollow laugh, "Thirty percent, Y/N, THIRTY PERCENT. You're going to have to do better than a half-ass apology. What exactly are you sorry for? Huh? For cheating? *Or being caught?*"

***

You rested your head on the seat as Jay entered the truck, flinching, when he slammed the door shut. Your pounding headache was getting worse by the minute, as your ears started to ring.

You blinked a few times squinting to focus on the road ahead of you but the fast-moving cars and the loud horns made you feel like your head was going to explode.

"Y/n," he addressed you, much calmer now.

You forced yourself to turn to your brother, who wore a confused expression.

But the moment he saw your deshelfed hair and your cracked lips, a wave of worry crashed over him. What the hell?

The truck came to a stop at a red light and Jay immediately scanned you over "Y/n?" he grabbed your chin, his jaw dropping, as he came face to face with reality.

"Are you drunk!!?" he barked , steam basically pouring out of his ears.

But your pleading eyes and empty silence gave him the answer he needed. "Are you kidding me??" he snarled as he slammed the steering wheel.

Oh God no. A blinding pain ripped through your head when Jay's palms made contact with the hard plastic. You winched turning your head away from your furious brother, letting out a whimper.

Jay's eyes widened at the sound, his heart breaking, realizing the pain you were in.

If he was going to be mad at you or at least punish you, you needed to be sober.

He stepped on the pedal as the light turned green taking a few breaths, trying to calm himself down.

With the vice lords reclaiming their territory and selling uncut fentanyl, bodies were dropping all over the city most of them being kids.

Kids..... your age.

Every kid at the morgue, just reminded him of you. He saw parents sobbing, begging for their kids to come back but Jay new better. They were never going to come home. Ever.

So he made it a priority to catch these ruthless creatures. He made it a priority over his sleep, over nine hours shifts and unknown to him, over spending time with you.

"Hey , hey" he whispered, not wanting to hurt you again, "We'll talk about this later ok? for now...... just..... it's ok..... I've got you" here reached out his hand, the other still on the steering wheel, to slowly rub your back as you tried to breath through the pain.

" I got you"

***

Jay wrapped a hand around you allowing you to hold onto him for support.

Silently, he deposited you on the couch, laying you down. He knew that he wasn't in any state to talk to you. He needed to clear his mind from his racing thoughts and rueful images of dying teenagers.

His phone rang, indicating that the district was awaiting him. "Here" he reluctantly shook your shoulders "Y/n, I need to go ok? Will will be here soon"

***

Almost half an hour had passed and you were waiting for Will to get out of the shower. You'd heard Jay explain everything to him over the phone.

You thought about how disappointed he would be.

Will —being the nerd he was— always helped you with your projects and gave you pop quizzes during breakfast, before your exams. He taught you how to organize flashcards just like he did in med school.

Even through your blurry thoughts, the image of Will's betrayed face and embarrassed eyes, knowing you cheated, lingered on your mind.

Your body was all over the place. Tiny noises echoing through your ear. Your muscles simultaneously aching and loose.

You were shivering as you tried to curl up into a ball. Your body trying to hold what little heat it had within itself.

But nothing stopped your tears.

You felt water drops make their way down your cheeks forming small splotches of water on the cushion you laid your head on.

And you didn't bother to wipe them away.

Will more or less was in the same state you were in. There was a multi-vehicle accident on the highway and victims were piling in the ED. He was running from one treatment room to the other, waiting to get back home and crash.

Will walked over to you with a huge glass of water and an advil, gently  nudging you to sit up.

Your head still pounded, your eyes zoning in and out of the figure in front of you "Y/n, here drink the whole glass and take this" Will soothed, placing the glass and the pill in your hand "I—I'm sorry" You whispered, distracting yourself from Will's eyes.

Will knew he should be angry. Just like Jay was but he couldn't bring himself to blaming you, not until he had the full story anyway.

You looked so petite on the enormous couch, your legs folded on top of each other, arms shaking as you drowned the glass of water along with the Advil.

Your red puffy eyes and tear strained cheeks,were a contrast from your usual self. or he thinks. He's been pretty busy lately, so he's not too sure. " We'll talk about it later. I'm not angry. I promise"

He assured and was about to head to bed himself when you grabbed his wrist.

If he wasn't angry at you then maybe— just maybe—he would help you.

"Stay" You pleaded , the word falling from your lips just as easily as it had, many, many times before.

And just like before, you were met with Will's soft brown eyes filled with sympathy, ready to help. Ready—to be by your side.

He's slowly nodded climbing onto the couch, next to you. He wrapped an arm around you and you nestled into him, laying your head on his chest.

You found some comfort as he embraced you, talking you under his arm and encompassing you in his warmth.

Holding on to him, you hoped that he would take your pain away, just like he did when you were little.

***

Will woke up to an uncomfortable feeling of something —or someone—   tugging at his shirt.

He slowly opened his eyes allowing them to adjust to the light as he felt another a tug at his side. He looked over to you, but your eyes were shut, brimming with tears, your arm laid across his chest.

You were holding on to Will , using him as a lifeline, grounding you from the pain.

You felt a hand squeezing your own, stopping you from gripping the fabric "Y/n?" You opened your eyes to look up at will who had tears of his own, staring at the state you were in "it's okay, I'm here, I'm right here"

He encircles you, tighter than before, whispering soothing assurances into your hair.

***

With Will's help, the pain slowly subsides, allowing you access to your thoughts again.

You step out of the shower, into the living room and your eyes widen seeing Jay and Will sitting at the kitchen counter.

You didn't even hear Jay come in, but right now taking in his hardened glare, you didn't dare ask.

You knew what was coming and you didn't fight. You couldn't.

"So apparently we're cheating on our midterms now, huh?" Jay's calm voice made shivers run down your spine, starting to take rapid breaths.

"And apparently, someone thinks it's ok to steal alcohol from my stash" He gritted, never breaking I contact with you. "Do you think that's how the world works Y/n? DO YOU? BECAUSE LAST TIME I CHECKED YOU'RE STILL A FUCKING TEENAGER!!" He spat, his thoughts fuming towards your trembling body.

It was every dieing body flashing before his eyes, as the past months' agony slipped off his tongue.

"Jay" Will's voice was stern, giving a knowing look towards his younger brother and didn't bother to give Jay time to argue with him.

"Y/n, we need to know what's going on"

"With school, with tests with....... everything" he stated giving you a solemn look meaning every word he said, promising himself that he would do whatever it takes to figure out what had been going on.

You sucked in a breath weighing all your options. You didn't want them to think that you needed a babysitter or  that you couldn't take care of yourself.

You knew that they had their own problems to worry about but you couldn't take it anymore.

You hated it.

The feeling of your lungs collapsing, struggling to find air for your body, your stress skyrocketing anytime you sat down to study, never getting any thing done.

All day long you would constantly tell yourself to do your work. Every spare second is spent in making a list of things you want to do but when it was time to actually do those things, your mind wandered and emptied.

You took another deep breath, looking up from your feet, your eyes meeting your brothers.

You spilled the past months events from how alone you were all the time and not being able to concentrate to how you ended up drunk at school and cheating on your midterms.

Tears rolled down your cheeks as you your hands trembled. You stood crying in the middle of the room until you felt a pair of arms around you.

Will placed his hand at the nape of your neck as he stroked your back with the other "Breathe Y/n, just Breathe" He slowly pulled away leading you to the couch.

God, how he wished he could turn back time. Then he'd been more vigilant to notice the changes that had come over you.

You felt the couch dip on both sides but you intently studied your fingers, fumbling with the hem of your shirt and wiped the tears off your face. They were mad. No, they were furious. You knew it.

But for some reason, they weren't showing it. Maybe they were waiting-

"We're not mad"

You without your head around to look at Jay, furrowing your eyebrows in disbelief. Jay? Not mad? HA.

"but I am disappointed though, but that's only because you didn't tell us......

but stealing alcohol was bad too" he added, earning him a glare from Will.

"Y/n, what Jay means is— we could've helped with school . Homework . Tests . Anything, you name it. We will help" he assured, "But how do we know you need help, if you don't tell us?"

You sighed, taking in the weird turn of events that had happened before you. You had wasted all this time, trying to figure out all your problems out, when the answer was right in front of you.

A mountain of guilt now sat on Jay's shoulders, weighing down on him, pushing him deeper into a wormhole of 'if's'.

Maybe if he'd just been a little more careful, this wouldn't have happened.

Maybe if he'd stop and listen to you once in a while, this wouldn't have happened.

While trying to save kids out on the street, he forgot to care for the kid at home. You were his sister, and yet, here you are in front of him, barely keeping yourself together.

But that would change. Right here. *Right now.*

"Y/n," Jay started "If you would have told us how alone and stressed you were feeling.....I would've taken some time off... Maybe we'd watch a movie or something. All you had to do was ask...... And we'll get you the help you need, y/n. You good with that?" he questioned, his anger and frustration dissipating.

You saw your brother, the workaholic detective, wanting to put his job aside, for you .

You were more important to him, than his job—You realized.

" Yea... Yeah, I am"

Will stood up and got another advil with another glass of water. "and maybe you wouldn't end up drunk and cheating on your test" he smirked, crouching in front of you.

"God, I didn't think it would hurt this bad. I am never drinking again!" you smiled , as you drowned the pill.

"See now that's what I like to hear!!" Jay exclaimed, wrapping his arms around you, squeezing you into his chest. You squirmed, trying to get out of his grip, laughing, when you were joined by Will.

You know what? Maybe, things are going to be okay? Ya know?

__________________________

Read more of my fics here!!

Tagging : @girlandthemoon @herecomesthewriterwitch @megaliciab @meyocoko @alkadri-layal

[george-fabian-weasley]

if we had 5 more minutes — f. w.

Summary: You thought you could save Fred from the rumbles of falling stones; you did your best, only to be in the rumbles with him instead.

Words: 2,160 words

Warnings ⚠ : ANGST, TW: Death, TW: Battle of Hogwarts, TW: war, TW: injuries, Fred died, you died, big Pain™, I strongly suggest tissues and a dozen of comfort chocolates, I cried so you will too, Basically An Emotional Rollercoaster, Read At Your Own Risk

Disclaimer: inspired by Billie Eilish's cover of The End of The World, so... ya'll know this is going to be a painful ride. Buckle up your seatbelts and enjoy. Reblogs and Comments are Highly Appreciated! <3 p/s: reading this with the song at the background really helps with the tear pouring effect ;)

Disclaimer 2.0: i know what yall are thinking... what tf is syaf doing, posting a fic when she’s in a hiatus she just posted yesterday? Also where is mad hatter chap 5 and epilogue? well, my brain likes to conjure up ideas at very inappropriate times (like rn) so bare with me and uh i’ve been really physically and mentally exhausted from work (retail is bathshit crazy) to write the mad hatter series so idk when will i update the two chapters but i’m working on it! thank you for being patient, and im sorry for causing you guys to wait for so long, ilysm don’t kill me <3 

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The end of the world.

The Battle of Hogwarts looked like the end of the world. Curses and spells thrown left to right, different kinds of bodies found at each corner and crook, walls here and there crumbling as down as hope for freedom. And blood.

At that point of time, the pools of blood on the floor look the same; pureblood or not. Because they bleed the same anguish red.

You didn't need to see the apocalypse of the world anymore. Screw the end of Mother Earth; this battle in front of your eyes was more than enough — sadly — to be your end of the world.

“Hey,” You called, causing Fred to turn his head around to your direction, his lips etched up a smile before replying with another hey. You sat next to him, the place where George had sat before he got up and left to speak with Professor Lupin.

Evil is winning, and good is losing. But then again, what difference would it make; if good kills as many as evil? At the end of the world, there is no good and evil alone. There are desperation, madness, and hunger for power, lust for victory brought along with them.

So, at the end of the world, you chose to be side by side with your lover, Fred Weasley. The red-headed dork you’ve taught yourself to pour your love into had become the very source of your life. He is your elixir, he is your soul, heart, and happiness.

It was silent for a while, none of you had anything to say. Yet the silence was comforting, with only the presence of each other as calming as it is. “Y/N,” Fred suddenly turned his head to you, biting his lower lip in contemplation. “Hm?” “Can you just stay at the Burrow?” 

You blinked, “What?” Fred sighed, “Can you just stay at the Burrow right now and not join the war? I- I don’t want you to join in-” “Fred-” “I-It’s dangerous and it’s literally a war a-and I don’t want you to get hurt I would- I would rather die than have you hurt-” 

“Fred!” You raised your voice, your hand clasping onto his securely, an effort to calm his frenzied thoughts. He stopped rambling and stared at you with those doe eyes you adored so much, “You know I can’t do that.”

“We need everyone on board for this war. I am no exception- bloody hell, even your parents are joining in, Freddie!” You tried to explain slowly, and Fred closed his eyes in denial of defeat. 

“I love you,” he suddenly blurted out. He noticed the slight fluster you had, your eyebrows were raised for a millisecond before they furrowed upon a realization, “Wait, why are you saying this now? I-“ “I love you, Y/N,” he repeated himself and you shook your head, realizing what he was doing, “Wait, hold on a minute, no-“

He was saying it in case anything happens.

“Y/N, I love you-” “Don’t you dare say it one more time like you’re not gonna make it, Fred Weasley, I swear to Merlin,” You cut him off, your jaw clenching at his absurdness. “… Aren’t you gonna say it back?” Fred asked, his voice was small.

“I-” You sighed, “No, I won’t because I don’t want to say it right now, given the circumstances,” You paused, your voice quieting down, “It felt like a goodbye when you say it like that.” “Then when will you say it? We’ve been dating for almost a year and you'd never say it before,” He said.

“Really? This is the time to argue about this?” You gave him a pointed look, but your expression softened as you understood the meaning behind his actions. “Look, Freddie, I- You know how I feel about us,” You sighed, looking down at your hands on your lap, “You know I’m not that expressive with my words but- but I’m trying and- okay, let’s make a deal,” Fred’s ears perked up the mention of a deal. "I'm listening," he drawled.

“I’ll say the words when the war is over,” Fred gave you a sour look that clearly said ‘really?’ and it caused you to huff a smile, “Once everything is over, and everything is okay again, I’ll say them as many times as you want me to, okay?” Fred leaned into your touch as you cupped his cheek with your hand, kissing his forehead.

“Even if I made you say it a thousand times?” He asked and you chuckled, your heart warming at his childlike question, “I’ll say it for an hour if you asked me to.”

It happened so fast.

One second you were fighting off the Death Eaters with Percy and Fred, and then the other, you find your body aching at the major pressure from the rocks and debris that used to be Hogwarts’ protective wall from the outside world.

It was dark, and it was dusty, but you were too unconscious to notice. That was until you felt your cheek being patted a few times. As you gained consciousness with a cough or two, you also gained the pending pain spreading all across your whole body. You couldn’t feel your legs, or safe to say your whole lower body part. 

Memories of you a few moments ago trying to push Fred away from the rumbles but ended up facing the falling stones head-on with him instead began to flow back into your mind. How foolish could you be to act like a hero, as if you could sacrifice yourself for him to live.

“… Y-Y/N…”

You turned your head with a silent grunt, and your eyes fixate at the body beside you, a few feet away, Fred. 

He had blood leaking from his nose and ears, probably from the impact, and his face was dusty with debris from the stones. As he looked at you, he threw you a smile; a weak, hiding the fact that he’s in immense pain kind of smile.

“F-fancy seeing you here,” he grunted with a wince, a smile nevertheless rested on his lips. “Fred…” you could only mutter his name, closing your eyes for a brief second at the growing pain on your thighs. The pressure from the rumbles had slowly increased, and you felt yourself losing consciousness again. Only to be brought back to open your eyes as Fred poked your cheeks a few more times, “Hey, hey, s-stay with me, love.”

“We’ll… We’ll be okay.”

You winced at the trickling sensation on your skin as you tried to move your fingers towards him, “It’s… It’s impossible, Fred…” You voiced out, your voice cracking up. You saw Fred’s lips quivered before he threw you another comforting smile, “Don’t… Don’t say that. We’ll make it… I-I know we will.”

“We… We will?”

Groaning from the injuries on his body as he tried to move closer to you, he nodded, “We will.”

You felt his fingers trying to reach for yours, and you handed him assistance as you hooked your fingers with his. His hand was cold, trembling. But it was Fred’s. And Fred’s hand is always warm.

“It’s… It’s so heavy,” You whimpered in pain, looking at Fred for comfort. All Fred wished to do at the moment was to be strong enough. Strong enough to push off these rumbles pressing onto his body. Strong enough to pull you out from the pain. All he wished for was for you to not be in pain anymore. But he knew he couldn’t do anything. The rumbles were too big, too heavy, and it would take a while for anyone to find them at the bottom of everything. 

Fred breathed out heavily through his mouth, slowly finding it difficult to breathe through his nose anymore, trying his best to look strong for you, “Stay with me, love. S-stay with me. Five more minutes. F-five more minutes and they’ll- they’ll save us…”

“Fred…”

“Five more minutes, I promise…”

You saw the desperation in his eyes, trying his best to somehow keep you afloat until you two are saved. You heard muffles from the other side, Percy screaming for Fred and you. His screams were sad and painful to hear; you would’ve cried for him if it wasn’t for the constant high-pitched ringing in your ears.

“Fred, h-hold my hand. P-please,” You whispered, finding no more strength to say anything louder than a whisper. He instantly intertwined your fingers with his, stretching as far as he could to reach you; no matter how screeching the pain in his lower body was.

“Fred,” You called him again. He chuckled a bit, “You’re… you’re saying my name a lot of times right now, darling.” You huffed a smile, the corner of your lips twitched, “… I want to ask you something.”

“… Anything.”

Your eyes met his, even in the darkness, his eyes still managed to look so beautiful. So earthly beautiful. “… Are you happy, Freddie?”

There was something about the way you say it, Fred couldn’t get a touch of what it was but… it felt like a goodbye. As much as Fred hated to admit, he wasn’t holding on much longer either. He was bleeding heavily from everywhere, his wand was out of his reach, and his body was starting to numb. His vision began to blur by itself, hence he blinked his eyes repeatedly. Trying his best to see your features clearly, one last time, if the worst happens.

This is it, he thought. This is the end of my line. 

Finding an urge to cry, but didn’t have enough strength to sob, Fred let out a tear or two onto the dusty surface he laid his head on, his eyes closing after the content stare of your beautiful— though bloody and dusty— face. How ironic, he’s slipping away first even though he was the one who said five more minutes.

If only you had five more minutes.

“W-with… With you? Heh, always… “ The whisper coming out from his mouth caused you to narrow your eyes at him. It felt strange, it felt wrong. Was he saying goodbye? Watching Fred close his eyes was alarming, so you gained all your strength to pat his hand a few times, “H-hey, Freddie… Five more minutes. Hang… Hang on for five more minutes, please.”

You squeezed his hand, and he naturally squeezed back, only this time it was weaker than usual. His grip on your hand started to soften, but you tightened yours desperately. The pain all over your body was partially forgotten, your only focus was on keeping Fred breathing and alive, as well as yourself. 

“I’m… I’m trying, my love… but I’m sleepy… and tired…” he mumbled, his words became slurred by time. He was on the edge, you realized that. Upon the sad realization, you bit your tongue, trying your best to prepare for the worst. “L-look at me, darling,” Your voice quivered, feeling the sandy surface on your temple as you tried to force your eyes open, to properly look at him, “Look at me.”

You knew it. He was slipping away from your fingers, and you were slipping too. It didn’t matter anymore even if Percy bulldozed his way to you now, it was too late. Simply too late. And that’s none of his faults. It’s none of his and none of yours.

Some things are just meant to be.

You took your other hand and placed it onto his cold, dirty cheek. Caressing his cheekbone gently, you gave him a comforting smile, “Fred.”

He looked at you, a faint smile on his lips. He’s at the end, you acknowledged. You widen your smile to assure him, although the tears escaping your eyes say otherwise, “… You make me happy. You make me so so happy. And I… I love you.”

“I love you, Freddie.”

With a big smile, Fred widened his eyes weakly, letting out a sigh of content as he looked at you with gentle eyes,“… Now that wasn’t so hard, now was it?“

Gentle eyes that soon hollowed empty.

“Yeah,” the dam of your tears broke down, “Took me a long time...” You squeezed his now lifeless hand, trying to find comfort and warmth from him for the last time. You smiled at Fred, whilst tears rolling down your temple slowly as if mourning the passing of your lover for you. You inched closer to him, careful not to graze your injuries, and met your nose with his.

You caressed his cheek, finally feeling yourself lose consciousness. This is it, you thought, I won’t wake up ever again. “You said we’ll be okay,” You whispered weakly, huffing a content smile on your lips. Staring into his eyes that had held so much love and pure unadulterated affection for you all these years, now empty with no trace of life, had sent you into pain more powerful than the injuries present on and in your body.

“I guess we will be, after this.”

“… You spent your last five minutes with me, huh?” You felt yourself going in and out of consciousness, and your vision blurring continuously, “Aren’t you a sappy git,” the mere whisper escaped your mouth with a sigh. The warm smile never left your lips, and the only thing in your mind was how peaceful he looked as of that moment, and you wondered if you’ll ever be in that state of peace, with him.  

“No- no- no!” someone was shouting. “No! Fred! no!” And Percy was shaking his brother, and Ron was kneeling beside them with his hand on Y/N’s head, and the pair of lovers stared at each other without seeing, the ghost of their last smile still etched upon their faces.

On our last few drags of air, we agree

I was, and you were

Happy

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[ichorai]

cellmates ; five ; j.wy

pairing ; jung wooyoung x reader

summary ; stuck in jail after stealing a necklace off the princess, what happens when your new cellmate with an impossible escape plan comes along?

themes ; fantasy, angst, slowburn, action, adventure, medieval, pirates, magic, elves, mermaids, royalty

words ; 8.9k

warnings / includes ; character death, blood and grime and injury and everything in between, reader being tied/chained up :(, vulgar cursing, crying, rowdy pirates, "keep the love interests away from each other" trope <3, ✨pure confusion✨, me torturing my characters once again yikes, ateez cameos !!, cellmates to (future) lovers !!

a/n ; uhm. hi. first off, i apologize for taking so long with this series KWHJKSDFK and second, i am also so sorry for what you're about to read o.0 this one's a real angsty part folks :') i swear i swear it gets better don't be too upset :(( i love writing this series so much (it's prob my favorite original story) and im so excited to hear yalls thoughts :D

cellmates masterlist.

a map of this universe is included at the end of the chapter !!!

Cerulean beaches never quite looked like real beaches to you. The sand was as white as snow, the gentle lapping waters so bright they looked to be molten sapphires. It was all far too perfect to be naturally authentic. You were pleased to find that your boots left shallow imprints in the sand, disrupting the once pristine terrain.

Night was creeping upon you once again, and you were in desperate need for a good sleep. You were lucky that Yunho didn’t live very far off, also pleasantly surprised to find that you could even remember the way back (though admittedly, it took a considerable amount of backtracking).

The front of his little cottage was just as you remembered, albeit dark and somewhat dingy. None of the candles or oil lamps were lit and the curtains were drawn. The large expanse of his garden seemed somewhat unmaintained, weeds starting to sprout from between the wilting, once bright flowers.

You knocked against the door thrice, clasping your hands behind your back while you waited. How would Yunho react upon seeing you? What if he blamed you for losing Wooyoung? What if he didn’t believe you? What would you say then? Much like the first time you came to Yunho’s little cottage, tumultuous questions and irrational thoughts churned about in your mind.

It took a long while for you to realize that nobody had answered the door yet. You blinked, mystified, and raised a fist to rap on the wood again. You grew impatient rather quickly, knocks progressively becoming more frequent and hurried.

“Yunho?” You called out after about five minutes of waiting. By then, it was obvious that the man was either not home or avoiding you on purpose. And considering how friendly and sweet the pink-headed giant was the last you saw, you doubted it was the latter. “I’m coming in!”

The door opened in a fluid motion, knocking against the wall behind as you swung it open. You stepped inside tentatively, peering around with widened eyes. It was completely dark inside. So much so that it took you a few minutes for your eyes to properly adjust to the ill-lit hallway. Just as you had remembered, the small living room was to your left and quaint kitchen to your right, the winding staircase situated in the corner. The familiar scent of maple wood was still lingering in the air, although faint and almost imperceptible.

You shut the door behind you and toed off your boots, shuffling into the kitchen.

“Yunho?” Your voice eerily echoed in the empty cottage.

And so you made your way up the staircase, peering into the bedrooms. A heavy feeling gripped at your chest when you glanced into Yunho’s bedroom. That was where you and Wooyoung kissed… you could still remember the feeling of his arms wrapped around your waist, his warm breath on the back of your neck. You wondered what would’ve happened if you hadn’t stopped him. How far would the two of you have gone?

Shaking all thoughts of the past away, you bounded back down the stairs. There was no sign of Yunho at all. Just where could he be? You tried your best comforting yourself; perhaps he had gone out for a walk. Surely he’d be back soon.

Much to your dismay and gradually rising concern, Yunho didn’t show up at all. Not when the sun started to rise again, not when you passed out in sheer exhaustion on a kitchen stool (you couldn’t bring it in yourself to go back up to the bedrooms), and not even when you stirred back into consciousness, the late morning sun glaring at you harshly through the slivers between the curtains.

Your bones cracked and popped as you stood up and arched your back, rolling your stiff neck from side to side. From the pirate ship, you had brought little else than a knapsack full of gold you found in one of the cellars, food that could last you a couple days, water skins, and two sheathed daggers. Everything else on the ship was practically worthless, or too heavy to carry.

With a heavy sigh, you splashed water onto your face using the kitchen tap and patted your sleep-ruffled hair down. The skin around your wrists were still raw and stung when you rinsed away the crusted blood. You wished San had given you that coconut extract lotion; you couldn’t seem to find it anywhere on the ship. Guilt-stricken, you turned off the water and slung the knapsack over your good shoulder.

If Yunho was gone, then where else could you go? It seemed wrong to stay in his home without his knowing.

Air. You just needed air to clear up your mind.

Stepping outside felt like a mistake. Under the bright sunlight, you felt your head throb dully in agitation. The garden looked even more lamentable now than last night, the flowers drooping so far that their browning petals grazed the dry soil beneath. The air felt thick and heavy, and you huffed out several breaths to relax your tense muscles, shutting your eyes in the process.

“What are you doing?”

The voice was so sudden and unexpected, you couldn’t help but shriek, flinching back against the cottage door. You were met with an old man standing just shy of Yunho’s unkempt garden, his gaze confused and somewhat judgemental.

“W-What?” You muttered once regaining your scattered thoughts.

“I said,” the older man shot you an exasperated look. “What are you doing, waiting by that house? Nobody lives there.”

It felt as if cold water was dripping down your spine, and you crossed your arms over your chest, shivering slightly. “But… that can’t be true… Yunho lives here. He’s a, uhm, a baker, I think. This is his house.”

The old man regarded you like someone would look at a madman. There was something in his tone that told you that he wasn’t taking you seriously. “I’m sorry to say this, but nobody’s lived there for years and years. I’ve never heard of a baker named Yunho in this area.”

“No… but I was just here a few days ago with him…” Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip in thought. What was going on? Where could he have gone? What could’ve happened to him?

In your peripheral vision, you saw the old man hobble away, but not without stopping to glance back at you with narrowed eyes every few steps.

And then you remembered with a sharp intake of breath. You and Wooyoung were thrown into jail to fade away into nothing but legends… and now nobody believes you really exist… Wooyoung was thought to be dead by everybody… could the same be happening to his innocent, pink-haired friend? A dark, tar-slicked hand reached out into the confines of your chest and curled its slimy fingers around your palpitating heart in a steely grip.

They took Yunho. The realization had you slapping a palm to your mouth, tears pricking the corners of your eyes. It all made sense; the untended garden, the old man saying nobody’s lived here for years… it sickened you to think that the only reason you could remember him was because you weren’t in Cerulea when he ‘disappeared’.

“Oh, no. Oh, god, no!” You leaned against the door, overwhelmed. If they took Yunho, would they have Wooyoung, too? Did Wooyoung even come back to Cerulea? If he wasn’t here, then he’d be the only other person who remembered Yunho.

Just what the hell are you going to do now?

It felt wrong to stay in Yunho’s empty little cottage with your newfound realization. The pirate ship was the second best option, but even that was much too far for your trembling legs; you doubted you’d even make it to the beaches, much less get in a small boat to row back to the anchored ship. Besides, the memory of San jumping off the side was one that you weren’t very keen on reliving.

And so, that was how you found yourself in front of an inn, only two cobbled roads away. The heavy door whined as you gently nudged it open, shuffling inside. Your heart was thumping against your ribcage so loudly that you could barely hear anything else. For once, you were glad that your name had faded into legend. To them, you were probably just another nobody.

The inn held the thick aroma of cheap alcohol and spritzer perfume. You glanced around curiously, noting the few people poking away at their breakfast and chugging down their frothy ales.

What looked to be the owner of the establishment was standing behind a counter, looking bored. He caught your eyes, and despite your head telling you to turn around and walk back to the pirate ship, you found yourself shuffling forward.

“What can I do for you?” The innkeeper asked, eyeing your haggard appearance.

Feebly, you pulled out a handful of gold coins and dropped them onto the wood of the counter. “Can I just get a room for the night? Will this be enough?”

The man across from you stared at you incredulously, his gaze flickering from the gold to your wide eyes. “Where’d you get all this money from? You didn’t steal it, did you?”

You blinked twice, shrugging your shoulders slightly. “They’re my savings.”

He looked upon you dubiously, but accepted the coins nonetheless. “You can have breakfast if you’d like. It comes with the room.”

Shaking your head slightly, you replied, “thanks, but I just want to get settled in for now. I’ll come down for luncheon.”

“Suit yourself,” the innkeeper quipped, sliding over a rusty key with eight engraved into its dull metal. “Head upstairs, turn left.”

And so that’s where you went, the wooden stairs creaking under your weight. You slotted the key into the lock of a door that had a large metal eight clearly displayed, and heaved the door open. By now, it felt as if your muscles were on fire. Everything seemed to be aching.

The first thing your eyes laid upon was a small bed, a thin, lavender-hued fleece wool blanket draped over the lumpy mattress and a single measly pillow propped up at its head. It took everything within you not to dive into the warmth of the woolen layer, but you managed to bide your time, even if it was just a couple minutes.

You toed off your boots, the soles of your feet practically numb. The pack that hung on your shoulder was next to come off, sliding down your arm and onto the bedside table. There was an unlit candle by the windowsill, but still more than enough light streaming in, seeing how it was still quite early in the morning.

The air smelled of breakfast from downstairs; consisting of, from what you saw, honeyed oatcakes and fruit tarts and rations of fried eggs and sausage. Your stomach was still quite empty, but you didn’t have the heart to go back. You needed time to think, time to rest.

After you nursed a few sips of water from a bottle in your knapsack, you finally allowed yourself to sink onto the bed, sighing out in contentment.

Everything felt so quiet, so still. This all felt like one of the stories you’d make up back when you were still in the cell. Perhaps it was all a bad dream, and you’d wake up in Wooyoung’s arms in Yunho’s little cottage, his lips littering soft kisses down the column of your throat until you stirred back into consciousness. A shiver ran through your spine and you sluggishly tucked the blanket up to your chin.

But since this wasn’t a dream, you found yourself at a loss.

“Oh, Wooyoung,” you whispered. “What should I do? Where are you?”

It was so quiet that you could imagine Wooyoung’s voice in your head saying, “Don’t worry about me. Just go. Get back on the ship and sail away and never look back.” You frowned at the thought, curling onto your side so that your knees were pressed up to your chest.

“I love you,” were the last words imaginary-Wooyoung murmured, before your mind grew blank. The silence that followed was what ultimately lulled you into a tranquil slumber.

You were awoken partly from the light from outside angling directly into your shut eyes, and partly from the agitated growl emitting from your stomach. Blearily blinking the sleep away, you glanced around the room, fumbling for the bottle in the knapsack. After gulping down enough to quench your thirst, you slid out from underneath the purple blankets.

And following digging your knuckles into your eye sockets, you stumbled towards your boots, shoving your still-sore feet in. You didn’t bother lacing up the loose threads. After all, you were just going down for lunch, anyway.

Downstairs, the inn seemed far more crowded than it had been in the morning. A twinge of paranoia sang its trill song in the back of your mind, but you pushed the thoughts away, moving to sit on a dark stool in the corner.

“Slept well, I presume?” The innkeeper grinned slightly, raising an eyebrow at the state of your rumpled hair. “What’ll you have for luncheon, then?”

“Anything you have, I suppose,” you replied in a raspy tone, clearing your throat slightly.

A bowl of steaming rice and battered fish cubes slid across the counter, along with a side of warm bread and a slab of light canary-hued butter melting off the top. You were quick to tuck in, eating at a pace that would most probably have your stomach complaining in the near future.

The innkeeper looked like he wanted to ask you something, but ultimately didn’t get the chance as an influx of customers poured through the doors. You barely glanced upwards, wanting nothing more than to finish up your meal and head back upstairs to properly plan out what you were going to do. The growing crowd’s noise was starting to make you feel a little antsy.

A solid five minutes later, your bowl was already empty, save for sticky rice kernels stuck to the bottom. You dropped a gold coin next to the half-eaten buttery bread as a token of thanks for the innkeeper.

And when you hopped off the stool and looked forwards, you could practically feel your heart lurch into your throat. The sight of him was one that you never thought you’d see again, nor did you want to. You’d recognize him anywhere. He looked unchanged, the same roughly-shaven beard covering the expanse of his squared jaw, the jagged scar that trailed over his sallow cheekbones. Those damned stormy eyes, the same color as the princess’ silver necklace.

The man that had guarded your cell for God knows how long surveyed the chatting crowd with an ugly scowl imprinted onto his features, nose upturned as if he misliked being amongst the common folk. He moved away from the door, shoving past the common civilians milling about. The innkeeper was the first to notice the burly man’s presence, raising a questioning eyebrow.

“Hello, sir. How can I help you today?”

Completely skipping over any need for niceties, the guard held up an unfurled scroll, “We’re searching all nearby premises for a dangerous criminal. Looks like this.”

From your position, you couldn’t see what he was showing the innkeeper, but it was quite obvious that it was some sort of rough artistic rendition of you. Dread trickled into you as you watched his face morph into one of slight recognition.

You needed to leave. Right now.

The busy throng of civilians were used to your advantage as you silently weaved through the crowded inn, people you bumped into ranging from deliriously drunk to slightly tipsy. Your heartbeat was thundering far too loudly, to the point where you couldn’t hear what the guard was growling out. You were a couple meters behind him now… if he so much as looked backwards, you would be a dead person standing.

Shit. The knapsack. It was still in your room. You probably wouldn’t last two days without it. And so, you set off for upstairs, pace steadily growing quicker, in tandem with your palpitating heart rate.

Grab your pack, leave from the window, repeated itself over and over in your head, a mantra of panic and dread. Downstairs was too much of a risk.

You were running so quickly that your boots caught onto the wood of the stair steps, and you just about face planted against the bunt of the hard surface. Pain blossomed across your nose bridge and temple. Slightly disoriented, you pushed yourself back onto your feet and rushed away. No time. There was no time at all to get hurt. You needed to leave. What good were you to Yunho, to Wooyoung, if you were thrown back into a cell?

Utter relief sank its greedy claws into you as you burst into your room. No time, no time, no time, your own voice echoed in your head. You grabbed the knapsack and pushed at the window and—

“Shit!” You cursed angrily when the window didn’t budge, the cold panes wedged tightly against the wooden slats. It was then that you noticed the bolted lock clipping the window pane and wooden framing together. “Oh, fuck.” Your breaths came out as tight, staggered pants.

Before you could decide on what to do next, you heard shrill screaming come from downstairs, the terrible sound of steel against flesh reaching your ears. There was nowhere to go from here. You were trapped.

Practically hyperventilating at this point, you scurried back to the door. Perhaps if you went downstairs and blended into the crowd, you could get out without anybody else noticing.

But alas, you never got the chance. Because just as you turned into the hall, you were met with the horrendous sight of the stormy-eyed guard, the very same one that you saw every single day you were in that rotten cell, an appalling look of triumph splayed across his rugged features.

A leering grin twisted his ugly features in such a horrid manner that it took all you had in you not to retch. You noticed the way his sword was unsheathed, a ripe shade of carmine trickling down its sleek blade. No doubt that’s the innkeeper’s blood, you thought solemnly.

Before you could react, the guard’s calloused hand shot out to grab your forearm, pulling you along with him so roughly that you stumbled onto the floor, hands and knees scraping against the wood in a manner that had your skin torn and bleeding. Feebly, you attempted to grab at anything to hit him with, to hold on to out of desperation. With no remaining patience, the monster of a man yanked you upwards by the throat. Choked gasps left you as your hands darted up to claw at his clenching fingers, but you immediately stiffened when he snarled out something that had your blood running cold.

“The Gods have been kind to you today, girl. I would have you speared right here… have you bleeding out until all the life has been drained right out of you.” His putrid breath fanned across your neck as you struggled in his iron-clad grip fruitlessly. “Lucky for you, the princess has personally requested you be brought back alive.”

It was dark outside when Wooyoung cracked his eyelids open for the second time. Through the window across from him, he could see a plethora of stars speckled across a blanket of raven black, glinting and winking at him through the glass. The room he was in was beautifully decorated, stone arches elegantly curving just below the ceiling and intricate flame holders spaced out on the pristine walls. The candles bathed the room in a gentle honey-like luminescence; calming and tranquil, almost a sedative. All of his previous aches and pains were now dulled to gentle numbness.

Where am I?

“Glad to see you’re back awake. You’re not going to pass out on me again, are you?”

Wooyoung nearly screamed at the sudden voice from beside him, flinching so hard that the crown of his skull knocked against the bed’s headboard. He hissed in pain, face contorting into a grimace.

The elf (Yeosang was his name, Wooyoung faintly recalled) muffled a snort underneath his breath before swiftly pulling up a chair and sitting beside him, “Does it still hurt anywhere? I tried to heal your wounds with sarcio essence, but seeing that you’re human, it’ll take a bit longer for you to recover. You took quite a beating, you know.”

Wooyoung tried to speak, but the dryness in his throat made it hard to speak.

“Oh, here.” The attentive elf poured cold water from a pitcher into a small cup, handing it over to Wooyoung. He gingerly drank, swallowing with great effort.

“Where… where am I?”

After pursing his lips in thought, Yeosang bowed his head slightly, glancing at the tight bandages wrapped around the dark-headed man’s torso. “You’re in Nymaeden.”

“Nymaeden?!” Wooyoung just about shrieked. His bruised features twisted in agony. Perhaps he shouldn’t have shouted. Then, in a much softer tone, he mumbled out, “how did I get here?”

He was, most likely, all the way across the world from you. Although his mind was still heavily clouded, you were still fresh and prominent in his mind. He hoped you were okay… left tied up on that pirate ship… Gods, this was all his fault… What a fool he was, thinking you’d be okay after all that you’d gone through. You probably thought that he was dead.

The blond elf arched an eyebrow. “You don’t remember?” When Wooyoung shook his head in hesitant denial, Yeosang continued on patiently, leaning forward.

“It was just three nights ago…”

The waters were cold, seeping into his flesh and bones, filling every one of his orifices, the salt trickling into him like sand down an hourglass. He could feel it drip into his lungs. Bubbles of his life slipped past his cracked-open lips and Wooyoung, with what little energy he had left to spare, lifted his fingers and tried to catch the small globules of air. The sticky blood that clung onto his skin like honey dissipated into the ocean, staining the waters a darker, sinister hue.

Wooyoung closed his eyes. His limp body sank further and further down. This was the end.

But was it?

Mermaids, being curious and spirited creatures they were, watched the injured handsome man drift across the ocean, crimson blood seeping out of his wounds. They had seen how he was thrown off the ship, how he had fought when he was onboard. They took pity on him. Even unconscious, a pain, far deeper-rooted than his physical cuts and gashes, was quite obviously splayed across his features. It was the face of a man with an utterly broken heart. He had just lost something very dear to him, that was made abundantly clear.

The small group of mermaids glanced at each other worriedly, almost immediately reaching a mutual consensus. In a swarm of colorful scales and wispy locks of hair, they swam towards the unmoving body.

One of them shamelessly prodded at him, ogling him with widened eyes, and they waited with baited breath. Wooyoung did not awaken. And so, two of the elegant creatures wrapped their arms around his leaking torso, and jolted into a brisk swim, carrying him across the oceans. Wooyoung’s raven hair pulled away from his face, revealing the deep gashes across his paling skin. A thinning trail of his blood followed them. They had to be quick; this man was just on the verge of greeting death.

They were taking him to Nymaeden, the land of the Elves. The elvish folk were the best healers they knew, and they were rather fond of the mermaids. Perhaps they would be willing to heal this unfortunate soul.

“We found you on the beaches,” Yeosang said in a discolored tone. “You were… you were practically dead. It was a miracle we got your heart rate back up, really. You’re either an incredibly thick-skulled fighter or… you’re just a coward afraid of death.”

Wooyoung winced at the elf’s stinging remark. Which was it? Was he running away from what was inevitable? What was he fighting for?

Y/N, the small voice in his head chimed. Wooyoung swallowed heavily.

“These mermaids… could I speak to them? Maybe they saw where the pirate ship went!”

Almost immediately, Yeosang shook his head. “I’m sorry, the mermaids are long gone now. They’re due up North, and I doubt they’d come back anytime soon.” There was a whicker of sympathy hidden behind his molten hazel irises. “Do you have any other plans? We can’t exactly keep you here in the medbay for all eternity.”

For a second, Wooyoung’s ragged breathing stilled.

“Pirates,” he murmured under his breath unsurely, just loud enough for the elf to pick up. “Where can I find them?”

Rearing back, Yeosang hissed out, “you must’ve hit your head harder one too many times, human. You were almost in death’s bony grasp, and now you want to go back?”

“I don’t care!” Wooyoung erupted, flinging his hands upward, despite his muscles screeching in agony. “It’s not about me anymore. I left her on that ship… and I have to get her back. Please, Yeosang. Please.”

There was a beat of tense silence. Yeosang was no longer looking at the pleading injured man, but his head angled towards the window, gazing at the pale moon that decorated the night’s horizon in deep thought.

“You mustn’t tell anyone,” the blonde elf warned, narrowing his eyes. Wooyoung nodded vehemently. “Elves and pirates don’t mesh well together, I’m sure you know. Pirates are nowhere to be found in this country, they know well enough to steer clear of our waters. However… if you head westward past our nation’s border, you’ll find yourself in Cinisia. It might look like a small, harmless country, but I’m afraid you’d be gravely mistaken. Cinisia is perhaps the most dangerous country on the maps. Along their west coast, there’s an illegal trading market. Pirates swarm the coast like ants would spilt honey. If you’re looking for pirates, I’d bet all my silvers they’re there.”

Wooyoung took a moment to contemplate this. “How do you know of this market?”

“I’ve got into muddy territory with pirates myself,” he uttered with a stormy expression. A muscle ticked in his jaw. “I have said this before. Elves and pirates? Not the best of friends, I can tell you that.”

Releasing a shuddering sigh, Wooyoung asked one final question. “Do you think I’ll find them? Do you think I’ll get Y/N back?”

Yeosang leveled a cold gaze with the dark-haired man, before gracefully rising to his feet and striding towards the door. “I’ll get you a map and traveling clothes and rations. You can leave at first light, so get some sleep. You’ll be needing it.”

A sinking feeling weighed heavily in Wooyoung’s stomach. He hadn’t answered the question.

Right before he left, Yeosang paused by the arched doorway and spoke once more without even turning to look at him. “And just so you know… if you make it out of that market alive and empty handed… I want you back here in Nymaeden. There’s something I want to offer you.”

The elf left in a blur of sage fabrics and soft flaxen locks. The honeyed flames of the candles withered inwards with his departure, faint tails of smoke dissipated into the air. The room faded into darkness, but Wooyoung was far too afraid to shut his eyes.

He was scared of dreaming of you.

That morning was one of the toughest he’s ever had. Yeosang had handed him a pack of traveling rations and equipment, bidding him adieu with a stout nod of his angular face. His muscles groaned and screamed with agony with his every step. The trek to Cinisia took hours upon hours, with hardly a break. Wooyoung was far too jittery to stop. He had to keep going. Creeks babbled with glowing water and the trees whispered poems in the wind, their alluring shadows offering a tempting sanctuary.

The contrast between Nymaeden and Cinisia was startling. Whilst the former was a luscious country of opals and forestry and pale elegant fortresses climbing to the sky, the latter was… well, it was quite hard to tell what anything looked like past the thick red smog lacing the horizon. The air stank of ale and smoke.

Definitely pirate territory, Wooyoung surmised grimly.

The shrill noises of whistling and hollering was a telltale sign that he was close. Wooyoung stepped over weather-beaten rocks, peering around the rocky cliff ledge to see hundreds, perhaps even thousands of ruffians gathered together in a colorful flurry of stolen fabrics, foods, and riches that seemed all the more glorious under the sweltering sun. Now, it smelled strongly of stale fruitcakes and gunpowder and sweat. Not the best of aromas, that was for sure. There were also pirates yelling out indiscernible prices that seemed to climb with every shout. He was pretty sure he saw a couple of them scuffling in a fight, some landing a couple square punches (most missed because they seemed to be too drunk to aim properly) on the nose before brushing their injuries off as if it were nothing.

What an awful place. Wooyoung could only hope you weren’t here. Well, no, that was a blatant lie. He’d do anything to see you again.

After digging his knuckles into his eye sockets to wipe his weariness away, he blinked the colored spots away from his vision with a melancholic sigh. Gods, he was tired. Unfortunately, he had little time to lament, so he pushed himself onwards.

Wooyoung seemed to blend in just perfectly; he was thankful Yeosang decided to pack in a tattered cloak. The rest of the pirates didn’t seem to bat an eye. Standing in the middle of a throng of filthy seamen, it was hard for Wooyoung not to double over and retch. His roiling stomach didn’t aid his precarious state one bit.

Though everything seemed to be a cacophony of rowdy pirates and the clattering of illegal trade, Wooyoung picked up on a particular chunk of dialogue exchanged between a gaggle of men.

“Have you heard of the siren incident? Yeah, it happened near the Isles of Odralle! Can you believe? Ship was fuckin’ headed to the capital of Odralle, but they had a sudden change of plans; suddenly wanted to go to Aurecia. Cocky bastards think they can sell anything to anyone nowadays, yeah? Good thing the sirens took them. Wonder if they were tasty, though. Stupidity fouls the meat, my father used to say,” one of the pirates rambled as he slurped on his ale.

“Your father was a jackass,” another snorted, pounding on his chest with laughter. “What the fuck is a ‘siren incident’? I swear you lot gossip ten times more than me wife does.”

A third pirate shoved at his shoulder, a look of incredulity painting across his tanned features. “How have you not heard? A famous pirate ship - maybe one of the most famous ones in history - got lured into siren territory! The whole crew’s gone. Ship wreckage hasn’t been found. Nobody’s heard or seen them at all. My guess is that they made a calculation mistake and went off navigation charts once switching from Odralle to Aurecia. Then the sirens… got the best of ‘em.”

This elicited a gasp from the fourth in the group. “Wait! The big ship with the peg-leg captain with just one eye? Damn, just hearing stories about him gives me the creeps. Legend had it that he defeated not one, but two fuckin’ krakens during a storm! His ship flag is, er, the red and gold one… with a skull, right? And the skull’s laying in blood and swords?”

Wooyoung felt his blood run cold.

He knew that flag. The flag they were describing… was exactly the one he saw before they took you… before they threw him out for the sharks…

And before Wooyoung could even think it through, he found his body jerking forward, pushing past the bystanders and throwing himself into the gossip circle with all but a mangled growl escaping his throat. He yanked the last pirate to speak forward by the collar until the tanned man’s face was so close, his nose brushed against Wooyoung’s. The rest of the gang immediately quelled their incessant yammering, eyes growing wide in interest. Some placed their hands onto the hilts of their curved swords as a precaution, but they didn’t want to do anything hasty. After all, they loved a good fight.

“WHEN WAS THIS?” Wooyoung was glad his voice didn’t crack as he yelled, shaking the stricken pirate by the collar. “There was… there was a woman on that boat. She can’t be gone! She can’t be dead!”

They all looked at him as if he were crazy.

And after a second longer, Wooyoung’s grip loosened. It seemed he was a little rougher than first anticipated, because the fabric around the tanned pirate’s neck was crumpled and one of the pearly buttons came loose, dangling by a thin thread. He staggered backwards two steps, painfully sucking in lungfuls of rancid air.

Were you… were you gone? Was that it? Had you succumbed to the siren’s sweet song of death?

“Mate,” the tanned pirate spoke up with a lilt of sympathy in his tone. “There was never any woman on that ship. And besides, the ship hasn’t actually been found yet.”

The fire of hope that once burned brightly within the hearth of Wooyoung’s chest, was now but a dying ember. However, the man’s words gently blew on the warm ash until a new flame ignited. This was a different kind of hope. Who knows, maybe you had managed to escape the sirens. For all that was good on this planet, Wooyoung hoped you were still alive.

It was then that the most peculiar thing happened.

A man (if he could even be considered a man) - perhaps one of the ethereal beings he’s ever set his eyes upon - strode up to the circle of pirates, leveling his stormy gaze with Wooyoung. His hair was a shocking shade of pink, laying in loose strands across his forehead. A dirtied tunic hung over his shoulders in tatters, ripped and frayed in too many places to count. The belt that cinched around his waist was lopsided and unbuckled, dangling to the floor. The trousers he was wearing, a dusted shade of raven’s wing, was in the same state of disarray as his tunic. He was a mess, and Wooyoung could see a thick film of distraught glazing his eyes.

“My name is San,” he rasped. “And I was on that pirate ship.”

The marble was cold beneath your scraped knees. Your eyes studied the golden rivets decorating the pale white floor, splintering off into branches of aureate, though it was quite difficult to see through the bruises and unyielding blood obscuring your vision. If your hands weren’t bound behind your back, you would’ve at least tried to staunch the crimson seeping out of the fresh cut you sported across your temple. The guards had thrown kicks and punches everywhere they could reach until you had stopped struggling, every fibre of your being felt nothing but raw pain and the kind of anger that left you completely and utterly exhausted.

You just… you wanted it to all be over.

However, with the King and Queen sitting tall and proud just meters in front of you, you highly doubted things would be resolved at the snap of a finger. Beside their majesties sat the rest of the royal bloodline, dainty crowns of lustrous tawny and glinting silvers resting upon their regal heads.

They made you sick.

“I must say,” the Queen purred at last, placing her chin on her palm while gazing at you with a malevolent smile, irises of amethysts glinting in the cold light. “It’s impressive how you managed to escape the dungeons in your condition. Even got yourself a pretty little boat and everything.”

You could feel yourself blanching. How did she know about the pirate ship you left by the beaches?

“As I’m sure you’re aware by now, Y/N is only but a legend. Though nobody truly believes you’re real, you are still very much respected throughout the nation. And since you’re regarded so highly amongst the common folk,” the King rumbled, clasping his hands together with a smug leer tracing his lips. “You’ll be made a lowly servant for the lovely Princess, Amarelia.” He gestured further down the line, to a sweet young girl barely of age. The Princess was a frail thing, with skin of dove’s wings and lips of sweet peaches and lashes that kissed the apples of her cheeks. She somewhat resembled a fawn, what with her large eyes and innocently placant features. Her curled sienna locks were gathered into an elegant updo, showcasing the glimmering silver laces on her dainty neck.

The very ones that you tried to steal so long ago, and the entire reason you were even here. That necklace was what made you a well-known myth in Cerulea.

Anger broiled deep within you, but you kept your mouth clamped shut. There were guards ready to strike if you moved even a centimeter, and you decided to play it safe for now.

There was something you were practically dying to ask, though.

What did you do to Yunho?

“To welcome you into servitude,” the Queen surveyed you with hooded eyes. “Crawl to Amarelia and kiss her shoes. Thank us for not having you executed on the spot. Perhaps it shall give you an idea of your rank in this castle. You are nothing to us.”

“Mother!” The Princess gasped in protest with something akin to pity and horror melding into her soft complexion. It was clear that the sweet dove wanted nothing to do with this. In a way, you felt sorry for her as well.

Nobody paid her any mind.

With a heavy heart, you started shuffling towards the Princess. Pain and humiliation blossomed across your skin like flames crawling over oiled wood. A part of you considered standing your ground, lifting your head high, refusing to obey any of her commands. And you would’ve, truly. But… Yunho. If there was even the slightest chance he was alive and kept hostage because of you, you needed to remain on your best behavior. For his sake and even perhaps for your own.

Once in front of her, you dipped your head to quickly brush your lips against her fine cream flats, immediately straightening your spine with a grimace afterwards. Amarelia regarded you with a sympathetic look.

The guards stepped forward to roughly drag you back to your original spot. Your mind barely registered the cold sensation of metal clamping around your neck, the rattling of chains a ghostly echo in your ears. The Queen was grinning so widely it was a wonder her face didn’t split in half. It took everything you had in you not to spit onto the floor in defiance.

When they started tugging you towards the grand double doors, you realized that you couldn’t just sit around and allow them to throw you around like a ragdoll. You kicked out your feet in resistance, ignoring the cinching pain of the metal around your neck, boots thudding against the smooth marble surface. The guards swore under their breath, pulling you along ever harder.

“WHERE’S YUNHO?” Your hoarse voice ripped across the throne room. “DID YOU KILL HIM? DID YOU KILL YUNHO?! LET GO OF ME! YOU MURDERER!” The small quirk of the Queen’s perfect eyebrows had you spouting out obscenities, rage bubbling over your struggling form.

Double-doors swung open, and with that action brought the largest crowd you’ve ever seen in your life. There must’ve been thousands - no, hundreds of thousands of people out there. And they’ve all come for you. The myth and the legend. Y/N L/N.

It was all so sudden. You didn’t even remember how you got to the front of the highrise platform, being forced back onto your knees with a grunt. There were common folk and wealthy lords alike littered about the ocean of heads. Some looked to be terrified, others watching on with hanging lips of awe.

You swallowed heavily.

“Behold!” The King bellowed from somewhere behind you. There was a sneering lilt to his tone that made you want to spring upwards and knock his teeth out. “Your beloved Y/N!”

The crowd in front of you erupted into pandemonium. It was a strange and overwhelming cacophony of displeased boos and excited screams.

“A legend and a hero to some of you, I’m sure,” the Queen hummed, somehow instantaneously quieting the buzzing mass of people. “Now diminished to a mere servant. Y/N L/N is nothing, and acting like they are worth any bit more than scum will lead to treason. I’m truly sorry to disappoint some of you.”

She didn’t seem sorry at all. The crowd practically roared at that, most especially the commoners at the back, yelling curses until their throats were raw as they threw moldy apple cores at the guards.

You hung your head in shame, gaze trained to the wood slants of the stage. Hushed murmurs travelled about the rest of the crowd like waves gently crashing against shore. You were alone on this beach, it seemed.

Truly, utterly alone.

You must’ve had the worst luck in the world.

No matter how much you’ve fought, struggled, resisted, it always ended up the same. With you kept captive. That musty jail cell because of a damned necklace, then bound on the pirate ship to be sold off in Aurecia (a part of your heart sunk at the memory of the friendly fairy-pirate San jumping overboard)… and now a different cell, your wrists chained to the cobbled wall behind you. Your arms were sore yet numb, almost having lost any feeling in them, but that was the least of your concerns.

It was bright here, unlike your first cell. Back then it was always dark, and always cold. There was a crackling fire across the room, licking hungrily at the burning wood, casting amber phantoms across the expanse of your place of confinement. It wouldn’t be long until the fire died out and you’d be shivering once more. There was also a small window, but it was far away from your reach, and you wouldn’t even bother to try, considering your arms were laced above your head.

Being back in the castle had your mind racing. Everything had been so loud outside. But now that you were alone with only your own thoughts to accompany you, it almost felt suffocatingly quiet. The silence was deafening, roaring awful things into your ears.

You missed Wooyoung. What would he do in your position? You hoped he wasn’t here, truly. He deserved to be happy elsewhere. But you couldn’t deny that a small part of you wished he was back here with you.

Face it, he’s not coming to save you, the snarky voice in your head spat out. Nobody is. You’re on your own. You have to save yourself.

It was at that moment the door creaked open. A man with silver hair slid in, grimness splayed across his defined features, like the wiry shadows of tree branches marring the warm light of the room. You spotted the medical kit he clutched in his sure hands.

He was the royal healer. It somewhat surprised you that the King and Queen sent him. Perhaps it was Princess Amarelia’s doing; she seemed to have a pure enough heart. Her parents, on the other hand…

“Are you alright?” His voice was a soft thing, a mere whisper, almost lost to the loud snapping of the fireplace. Hesitance was evident in his tone, accompanied with stinging sympathy. “I apologize, that was a foolish question. Of course you’re not, that’s why I’m here. My name is Seonghwa, I’m the royal healer for this castle. May I?” He brandished a bottle of strange blue ointment and cotton patches. You had just been humiliated and degraded in front of thousands of people, and now a royal healer was apologizing to you? He was certainly giving you whiplash.

After pausing for the slightest of moments, you dipped your head just slightly, still waiting for something bad to happen.

“Sarcio essence,” Seonghwa murmured gently as he doused the patch with the blue liquid. “Ceruleans steal it from the elves of Nymaeden. Its healing abilities are unlike anything we’ve ever seen. Ever since magic, of course. But that’s a thing of the past now. Magic is illegal in Cerulea. Not sure if you heard while you were down there in your cell.”

That made a frown flicker across your face. Cerulea, the ever-perfect country, needing to steal things from other kingdoms?

And with another stout nod, Seonghwa leaned forward to swipe at your fresh wounds and bruises, cleaning away the dried blood with nimble movements. It stung at first, restrained hisses escaping your lips as you squeezed your eyes shut. It felt like your skin was burning, and everything was on fire and the silent monsters were screaming your name.

“It’s a good thing if it stings a little. That’s your body working to put itself together.”

It was silent for a long time. You had to clamp your teeth down on your bottom lip so as to not let him hear your pathetic winces of pain.

The healer seemed to notice this, brows furrowing. “You don’t have to try to be strong around me, Y/N. You’re hurting, and it’s okay to show that. I won’t think any less of you.”

You eyed him with somewhat of a dubious aura, before bobbing your head for the last time. “Thank you,” you muttered brokenly.

Seonghwa hummed softly in response, screwing the cap back onto the sarcio essence.

The familiar creak of the door swinging open floated across the rooms, and you snapped your head upwards. Even the healer appeared to be surprised, bowing his head low at the newcomers. Also known as, if you had to put it eloquently, the true and utter banes of your existence. If you were the single flickering candle, they would be the tornados constantly whispering your flame good night.

It was the King and the Queen, draped in a waterfall of golden lace, diaphanous silver silks, and striking tones of mauve matching the hue of their angry irises. They held their heads high, looking at you as if you were the shit stuck on the bottom of their fine shoes.

“Leave us,” the Queen commanded Seonghwa without even glancing in the direction of the medic. She kept her gaze trained on you, and only you. Silently, he left the room with not another word, shuffling out of the door, unable to spare you one last sympathetic glimpse.

After surveying you, the Queen graced you with what seemed to be a smirk, and beckoned towards the guards behind her.

“Bring him in,” she said, practically dripping with delighted malice.

What happened next had you choking on your own gasps, tears immediately rimming your eyes like frost sitting atop tree branches on a harsh wintry morning. It had your stomach curling into itself, nausea climbing up your throat, begging to escape. A scream, so disgustingly raw and broken that it didn’t sound like your own voice echoed throughout the room.

They threw a peach-haired man in front of you, and he crumpled to the ground as if he were nothing more than a stringless puppet. If you thought that you were hurt, it was absolutely nothing in comparison to the sweet baker that you were so very fond of. He looked to be half dead already, bruises mapping the expanse of his pallid skin as abundant as there were stars in the sky. His once-bright pink strands of hair now looked a sullen grey, as if all the life had been seeped out of him. Dried blood crusted his cuts and gashes, littered all over his shivering form. You swore, with every fiber of your being, you were going to kill whoever hurt him.

“YUNHO!” You cried, heart lodged in your throat. The soft giant who had once been so boisterous, laid unmoving on the cobblestone floor. Kicking against the wall, you yanked away at your manacles fruitlessly until your wrists grew raw, wanting nothing more than to fall to your knees and crawl to him and ask if he was alright. It didn’t matter that you were hurting yourself in the process, you just… you wanted to get out of these chains, out of here, away from everything.

How dare they?

Tears were rolling down the apples of your cheeks, conjoining at your jaw and dripping mercilessly onto the ground. A constant drip, drip, drip of your pain made loud and clear to everybody else in the room.

You were so furious, so heartbroken, that you had forgotten anybody else existed for a short second. It was a shame that you were only reminded when one of the guards stalked up with the King’s nod of approval, gripping Yunho by his faded locks and yanking him upwards. His face didn’t seem to even flinch, numb and desensitized.

Was Yunho gone? No… no, he couldn’t possibly be…

A confusing concoction of sobs and desperate pleas and hiccups tumbled past your lips far too quickly for even you to understand yourself

The events that transpired rushed by in an indecipherable blur. You could barely pick up what the Queen murmured.

“This beloved baker friend of yours…” she cocked her head to the side in mock-thought, purple eyes flashing dangerously. “He is strong, I’ll give you that. However, he seems quite adamant not to give us any information about the other prisoner, Wooyoung. They were childhood best friends, no? I’m sure you remember him, don’t you?”

Your heart stopped at the sound of his name.

How dare you? How dare you? How dare you? The mantra reverberated in your skull until it was all you could think, staining your mind with an inky, poisonous black.

The mocking sympathy evident in her tone had you thrashing against your bonds all the more. “And alas… I’m afraid we no longer have any use for him.”

Just like that, the guard holding Yunho upwards drove his longsword clean through the gentle baker’s abdomen, dropping him to the floor. An ungodly wail tore from your vocal chords, resonating across the room and painting wicked smiles across the two royal leaders of Cerulea. Much to your horror, Yunho uttered no sound, merely dropping onto the stone with a thud. Crimson pooled at his wound so quickly, that the rose-hued ichor grazed against your feet in a matter of seconds. You stopped struggling, the drumming of your heart loud in your ears.

Since your gaze hadn’t left Yunho’s unmoving body, you didn’t even noticed the Queen sidestepping the puddle of blood, forcing your eyes away by gripping your slick face with one of her cold hands. You tried to pull your cheeks away, but it was as if her fingers were steel. Her purple eyes were so close to yours, you could see the flecks of aureate gold embedded within the enticing lilac. The Queen flashed you a charming smile, as if she hadn’t just murdered your friend in cold blood. It seemed she noticed your pounding heart rate, because she murmured an incantation in old Cerulean that you couldn’t quite pick up. In an instant, you could feel yourself relaxing in her grip, wrists going slack in the cuffs, the muscle in your chest thumping slower and slower. A part of you was afraid it would grind to a stop.

Her pearly whites flashed as she grinned evilly. The lavender in her eyes darkened drastically, to the point where any trace of gold disappeared completely.

“We didn’t kill Yunho,” she leaned closer and whispered into your ear, her tawny locks tickling the side of your face. “Killing is barbaric.”

There was an old story of a gingerbread man and a fox crossing a river you often heard retellings of during your childhood. The fox swore up and down that he wouldn’t eat the gingerbread man whilst helping him cross the river. As suspicious as the gingerbread man was at first, he eventually climbed onto the sly fox’s back, naive with hope. The fox arrived at the other side of the river alone and with a full stomach.

It seemed you were the foolish gingerbread man and the Queen was the fox. The Queen’s magic seeped into your being, clouding your mind in a dangerous haze you could no longer fight.

You believed her.

[secretsappyabode]

Howdy Tiff!!! Do you have any particular scenes in that lovely head of yours where you see you and Ford gaining each other's trust? It could be little moments or big moments i am just over here knocking on your door asking for any of it please and thank u ✨🧡

Clover @tex-treasures

HELLO CLOVER PLZ DO COME IN AND HAVE A SEAT, LET ME PREPARE U A NICE DRINK

ok ok so, it kinda happens over time. it’s sort of in the little things, like random acts of kindness and just staying loyal in certain situations, but we each have our core moment. (this gets long so hang tight woops)

i think a moment where we came to trust each other was during a monster hunt. we were dealing with a category 10 phantom and things just got too risky. we got cornered and the phantom was aiming to possess ford to get its hands on fords journal. that meant all of our hard work, all of his hard work, could be destroyed in a matter of seconds. i wasnt having it so i sacrificed myself by shielding ford and letting the phantom possess me. 

i remember everything going black and i felt my insides twist and churn. my arms, my legs, my stomach, my head, i lost all control. all i could see was my vision, but even then my mind wasnt my own. all i could hear was harsh whispers, not that i could make out the words. none of the sounds i heard were familiar, everything felt loud and scary. until i heard a voice. his voice.

a face began to shape in my vision and i tried to concentrate on it. finally, i realised the voice was singing. it was something i taught him months ago when he was anxious and couldnt sleep. i taught him many songs, but this one...he remembered it was my favourite one. i manage to grasp a little bit of control of myself and i call out to him. i notice hes crying and something in me clicks. i struggle against the phantom in my mind as it shrieks and howls. with all my strength, i manage to slam my head against the wall. the shrieking stops. its ok, ford is in the room with me. he will know what to do. i trust him. 

-----------

i dont know how long i was out for, but i woke up in my bedroom. i looked around and saw ford sitting in a chair, asleep but close to my side. i poked him and called his name, he woke with a start and upon seeing me he immediately embraced me. i cant tell what he said exactly as he babbled on about “4 weeks,” “exorcising” and “a hand witch”, but i heard apologies and self reprimands about how he “should have paid attention,” “such a foolish oversight,” “i could have lost you.” i held him close and relayed to him that sacrificing myself was my choice and that im glad hes safe. "you scared me” he said, “why would you do something so insane?!” 

a little bit pot calling the kettle black, i said. “you dont get it,” he teared up again, “i do not want to lose you, tiff. you’ve....you’re extremely important to me.” it was the first time he confessed how he felt, if only a little bit. ford then told me the fear of losing me was so strong, it made him realise that im his closest relationship in gravity falls. his only close relationship. he then told me about his college roommate fiddleford. about his family. about his brother. and i realised how...big this is for him. he trusts me. i just sat and listened to him talk. i think he appreciated that.  

its about a week until we go out monster hunting again. we keep an eye on each other and we stay close. we exchange more words of “be careful” and “stay safe” and “ill look out for you.” things are still not out in the air, i can tell, and things are still very new in multiple ways. theres still so much to say, to feel, to allow ourselves to accept from the other. but ford has his wits, and so do i. and were not gonna let anything hurt us. we trust the other to do that. 

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KJDHFKJDHGKJSHGFJ SO YEAH UHHHH theres obvs more that i wanna say and maybe make more posts about, but this moment is definitely a core moment of trust for us. now if i can gush for a bit-

HHHHHHH LISTEN YALL its about the faith in another person, knowing they can be good to you, knowing that they know YOU and love you for it. the “newness” of it all comes from a history of bullies, insecurities and betrayals (from fords side.) we’re both new to this level of emotional intimacy for different reasons and we want to get it right. but its scary!! but we do want to try!! and we’re just two mutually pining idiots hghgrhgfhgrhfhg. 

god ok i do have more to say on this, but my brain is mush and ill probably have more coherent thoughts later so thats is for now! stay tuned folks ✨✨✨✨

[slytherinbarnes]

Sub Rosa [96]

xii. the stranger

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x reader

Word Count: 4.8k

Warnings: angst, fighting, violence, blood, language.

Summary: faced with the aftermath of bellamy’s betrayal, you finally get a chance to talk to him, only to discover that he may be too far gone.

a/n: i do not know what to say in these notes right now bc i just know yall are cussing me out with every update lmao the taglist for this series is open! I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!!!

previous chapter // season masterlist // series masterlist

You sit on the flimsy mattress beside your twin, your hand held tight in her own, both of your expressions contemplative as you try to figure out what the hell is going on. Across from you, Octavia sits on her own bed, looking at you both, a soft laugh slipping from her mouth. You and Clarke lift your gazes to her in tandem, and Clarke looks at Octavia with mild annoyance. “Something funny? Because I don't see anything humorous about this.”

“I’m laughing because I’m realizing just how much I missed the Twinadoes. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you both together.”

Clarke’s expression softens, her curiosity causing her to ask, “How long were you on Penance?”

“We call it Skyring. 10 years, good ones.”

You smile, remembering some of your better memories from Skyring. Cooking with Gabriel, chess with Orlando, braiding flowers into Echo and Hope’s hair. You whisper, “They were.”

Clarke turns to look at you in confusion, unaware of how long you’ve been apart. “You were there?”

“Not with Octavia, Diyoza, and Hope. We came later, the four of us: me, Gabriel, Echo, and Hope.”

“How long were you there?”

“Five years.”

Her jaw drops in shock, “It’s been five years for you?”

You nod and you see tears in her eyes. She drops your hand to pull you in a hug, and you're grateful for it, grateful to be back with your twin, even if it is in a jail cell. “Oh my god, la lune. I’m so sorry, we had no idea or we would have come sooner.”

You shake your head, pulling away to smile at her. “It’s not your fault, Clarke. It was only a few days for you, there’s no way you could have known.”

She looks at you, and you can tell she wants to know more, but she hesitates, not wanting to push you. You read her mind and look between her and Octavia. “It was hard at first. Really hard. The first few months...all I could think about was saving Bellamy and Octavia, and getting back to you and Madi. But over time, Gabriel, Echo, Hope, and Orlando wore me down. I started to warm up to them, and then one day I woke up and I realized that I hadn’t worried about the time at all the day before. I felt guilty about that at first, but once I stopped religiously counting down the days, time went faster after that. It wasn’t so bad in the end. We had peace, and we became a family, sharing meals and stories. And even though I missed both of you, and Bellamy, and Madi and the rest of our family, I was happy.”

Octavia and Clarke can sense that you have more to say, and Clarke reaches out to grab your hand again, prepared to console you. “And then we got here, to Bardo, and it was worse than I could have imagined. Because in the five years it took for us to play house on Skyring, Bellamy was killed here. I let myself relax too much, and he ended up dead. All those years of training...for nothing.”

Clarke squeezes your hand, and you glance at her before looking away, tears welling up in your eyes as you remember the loss you felt three months ago. “I lost it when I found out, which is why I can’t blame Echo for nearly crystallizing us all. She knew how hard all of this has been on us, and she tried to do what she thought was best to make things right again. She went about it the wrong way, but her heart was in the right place. Anyways, I do believe there are good people on this planet, but I know that Cadogan is not one of them. I want nothing more than to get the hell off Bardo. Nothing good has happened to me here, besides reuniting with all of you, and I just want to escape.”

“Me too.”

“Too bad my brother betrayed us to a man he just met.” Octavia sighs, turning her gaze to Clarke. “You know, I was just starting to understand you, but I guess it doesn't matter anymore. We’ll probably be dead soon anyways.”

Clarke’s brows pull together as she looks at Octavia, “Really? How so?”

“You have Madi, I have Hope. I'd do anything to keep her safe.” She scoffs a little, tears welling up in her eyes, and you and Clarke both look at her with concern. “What’s wrong?”

“A couple of days ago, she was just our little girl. Now she's messed up like the rest of us.”

You and Clarke both stand from your bed and move over to Octavia’s, splitting apart to sit on either side of her. Octavia takes one of your hands and one of Clarke’s, and the three of you sit together in silence, sorrow hanging over all of you as you think of the tragedies you’ve all experienced. And as the three of you sit together, the door to your cell slides open and Bellamy steps inside, looking different from the last time you saw him. His hair is cut and his beard is gone, his face clean shaven for the first time in a long time. It reminds you of the Bellamy you first met on the Ark, in more ways than one. Because this Bellamy is just as much of a stranger to you as that Bellamy was.

Bellamy walks inside the room, his white robes flowing, flanked by two guards on either side of him. You look at him in shock and cock your head to the side, masking your hurt with your anger. “You need back up to talk to us now?”

He turns to glance at the guards behind him, waving them out of the room. “It’s okay.”

As they step out of the room and the door slides shut behind them, the three most important women in Bellamy Blake’s life stand, a wall of strength and anger as they look at him. You are the first to break the silence, looking at your fiance in disbelief. “It’s about time. Bellamy, what the hell was that?”

Before he can answer, Clarke adds, “I have been racking my brain, trying to figure out how you telling Cadogan the truth about the Flame helps us. You know what I've come up with? It doesn't.”

Bellamy’s voice is soft, sounding conflicted as he shakes his head slightly. “I couldn't lie to him.”

Octavia snaps, “Really? Why not?”

He glances over at her, then Clarke, then you, relaying his reasoning on his change in behavior. “I had an experience, something that changed me to my core, something that explains why we're still here and where we're going. It came to me in a vision. Mom was there.”

Octavia gives him a weird look, unconvinced, and he continues, “The Shepherd led me to her, and there was a light, and it was beautiful and warm and peaceful, and I chose it. And when I opened my eyes, the storm had passed, just like that.”

You, Clarke, and Octavia share a bewildered look, and you look at your fiance, your anger softening a little as you take in his hurt expression. “Bellamy, I love you, you know that, but this sounds...crazy.”

He turns to you, his eyes widening slightly as he takes in your confused expression. “Natshana, I know how this sounds, but it’s real.”

You flinch a little when he uses the nickname, your brain struggling to see the man you love in the disciple in white that stands before you. He sees you flinch, and a look of hurt passes over his face before he turns to look at all of you again. “A war is coming, the Last War we will ever fight. Win it, and we become the light.”

Clarke snaps, “Is that what the cult leader told you?”

She turns and starts to pace, as Octavia steps forwards and adds, “Did he tell you what happens if we lose?”

“We won't.”

Octavia shakes her head, telling him anyways. “We turn into crystal, wiped out like Medusa, turning people into stone. It's the end of everything.”

“Not everything, just us.” 

“Just us?” You look at him in confusion. “Bellamy, everything we have done, we have done to survive. To help our people survive. And now you’re willing to risk everything on Cadogan’s insistence that we’ll win the Last War?”

He gives you a conflicted look, giving you a flash of hope that maybe he isn't gone forever. But then he pushes it away and looks over all of you, his voice growing louder and more insistent as he tries to convince all of you that him following Cadogan is not as weird as you think it is. “If I told you the AI that destroyed the Earth was storing our minds in the City of Light, would that be any more believable? What about a group of astronauts turning themselves into gods by transferring their minds into the bodies of their own followers in order to live forever?”

Exasperated, Clarke sighs, stopping her pacing to turn to Bellamy and throw her hands up in frustration. “Okay, yes! We've seen our share of crazy, but that doesn't change the fact that fighting some war to become the light is as ridiculous as the clothes you're wearing.”

He pulls a face, hurt by her comment on his clothes, but he pushes past it. “There's one way to find out: tell me where the Flame is.”

Clarke’s denial is firm and resolute. “No.”

“Clarke, yesterday, you were offering it up in exchange for safe passage.”

“Yesterday, I was bluffing! I made a deal to save my twin and my friends, knowing damn well I had no intention of following through with it. Today, I'm standing in front of my best friend, who I thought was dead, and I don't even recognize him.”

His expression is hurt, tears springing into his eyes as he steps closer to all of you, his gaze locked on Clarke. “I am the same person who helped bring you back from the dead, who refused to give up on you. There is so much more at stake here than you know.”

He turns to you, making his final, teary eyed plea to you. “I know you don't believe in transcendence, but I'm telling you it's real, and I am asking you to believe in me.”

You glance at Clarke and Octavia, their expressions letting you know that believing in Bellamy means believing in Cadogan. Something the three of you are determined not to do. Because even though you love Bellamy with all that you are, and you want to believe him, you know that this isn’t right. He betrayed all of you in the blink of an eye for a man that he thought was crazy back on Earth, and you’re worried just how far his devotion to Cadogan will go. You can tell something happened to Bellamy, something changed him, and you’re willing to listen to him to find out what that is, but you’re not willing to support Cadogan.

Which is why you turn back to Bellamy, trying to ignore the tears in his eyes, your voice sounding soft, but regretful. “Even if you're right, even if everything you're saying is true, we will not help that man start his war.”

He looks from you to Clarke to Octavia, seeing if they agree with you. When they make no move towards him, or say nothing to dispute your claim, he shakes his head and looks down at his feet. You can see him visibly recompose himself before he looks back up at Clarke. “Tell me where the Flame is.”

Octavia locks eyes with her brother, asking, “Or what?”

“I’m trying to save you! All of you, but if you don't tell me where it is, they will execute all of you. Please let me help.”

Your eyes widen at the word execute. It's one thing for the three of you to speculate that you're facing death, it’s another to have Bellamy confirm that they're ready to kill all of you if you won’t give them what they want. And despite the shaky intake of breath that you hear Clarke take, her answer to Bellamy’s request is unwavering. “Go float yourself.”

You turn and step back towards Clarke, the sadness in the room shifting to anger again. Octavia gives Bellamy a disappointed look before she turns towards you and Clarke, all of you turning your backs on Bellamy, standing together and comforting each other, waiting for him to leave. But instead of leaving, he sighs and calls out, “Guards.”

The three of you hesitantly turn towards the door, watching as four guards step into the room. Bellamy looks them all over before motioning towards Clarke. “Take this one to M-Cap.”

Clarke gives him an incredulous look, “What?!”

The guards close in on Clarke, and the two of you exchange a panicked look as they grab her arm and start to pull her towards the door. You jump towards her, trying to grab the hand that is reaching out for you. You’re all too familiar with the pain of M-Cap, and it’s not a pain that you want Clarke to experience. “La lune!”

“Clarke!”

As your hand closes around hers, you are pulled backwards by your other arm, one of the other guards in the room stopping you. You turn and punch him, getting him off of you, trying again to run after Clarke. As she is pulled out of the door, you hear Octavia protesting, but she is stopped in place by her brother. You run after your twin, barely making it past Bellamy before you are grabbed from behind and yanked backwards, onto the ground. One of the guards pins your arms to the floor while the other grabs you by the front of your shirt and punches you, pain exploding behind your left eye and cheekbone. They hit you again, blood blooming across your tongue as you accidentally bite down from the force. A third punch smashes your nose, and you're sure you can feel blood trickling down to your mouth, though it’s hard to think much past the pain. 

You can hear Octavia yelling at her brother and Bellamy yelling commands at the guards, but your brain doesn't process them, too focused on the pain in your face. You feel your wrists being released, the weight of someone’s body leaving you, your body now free to roll onto your hands and knees and spit black blood onto the stone floor. You feel a hand on your shoulder and you flinch before Octavia’s soft voice whispers, “La lune, are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” You spit again, pulling yourself to your feet, your anger flaring white hot as you turn towards Bellamy, your earlier sympathy now gone. “What the hell was that?”

He looks over your face, at the blood dripping from your nose, the bruise blooming along your skin, and you can see a flash of worry cross his features as he urges, “You shouldn’t fight them, the Shepherd authorized them to-”

You cut him off, your voice loud, “I don’t care! Bellamy, what are you doing? Letting guards beat me up, sending Clarke to be tortured? This isn’t you!”

He shakes his head, another hurt look on his face. Five minutes ago, you wanted to comfort him through his conflict, hear about what he went through. But right now, your mind thinking of your twin in danger, a danger he sent her to, you want to hit him. You want to punch those puppy dog eyes until they swell shut. But you keep your cool and control your anger as he shakes his head. “It’s not torture.”

You let out a short laugh, pushing your hair out of the way to show him the scar on the right side of your face that runs beneath your level two symbols and into your hairline. “It is if you fight it, and you know damn well she will.”

“All she has to do is tell us where the Flame is, and we’ll let her go. We’ll let you go.”

“No way in hell are we going to give Cadogan what he wants. The Bellamy I love would be right beside me, opposed to doing anything for the crazed cult leader that’s so determined to start a war.”

Bellamy shakes his head, “He’s not a cult leader, and he doesn’t want to start a war. He wants us to transcend, to have real peace.”

“Do you hear yourself? War has never brought us peace, Bellamy. Only death and pain. But let’s say that Cadogan is right, and we do win this war and transcend. Torturing your friends, your family, people you love, watching us be locked up and potentially executed is not the way to do it. Doing the right thing the wrong way isn’t doing the right thing. You know that.”

“I’m trying to save all of you.”

You shake your head at him, in disbelief that the two of you are on opposite sides. After everything with Pike, you were sure that you’d never be on opposite sides again, especially not for something this big, yet here you are. You don't have the energy to argue with him right now, because he clearly believes in Cadogan, or wants to believe in Cadogan, and you’re sure that nothing you say will change his mind. So you turn away from him, shaking your head in disappointment, angrily swiping blood from your nose before muttering, “Get out.”

“La lune, please-”

You spin around and cut him off, your voice loud. “Don’t call me that! My family calls me la lune, and as long as you’re wearing those robes and worshipping the Shepherd, you are not my family, you are my enemy.”

You wait for his face to fall before you snap, “Now get out!”

This time, he obliges, turning away from you quickly, knocking on the door to alert the guards on the other side. As soon as he’s out of your cell and the door is closed, you collapse onto your flimsy mattress, your anger finally giving way to your tears. Octavia crosses the room and sits down beside you, the two of you wrapping your arms around each other and crying as you try to come to terms with who Bellamy is now.

-

A few hours after Clarke is dragged from the cell, your door opens again. You and Octavia stand, expecting it to be her, but instead it is a group of disciples, all of them pointing weapons at you as they demand, “Back against the wall, hands out in front of you!”

You and Octavia do as they say, stepping backwards and pressing your backs to the wall as you hold out your hands. A guard walks over to you and slips a pair of cuffs onto your wrists, a thick metal bar holding your arms apart, before they grab your arm and drag you to the door. You and Octavia are dragged through the halls of Bardo and led to the Stone Room, much to your surprise. As the doors open, you see that your friends are already here, lined up against the wall. Everyone looks at you in surprise, now more injured than the last time they saw you, but you shake off their worry, letting them know you’re okay. 

Octavia is led towards the end of the line, pushed between Hope and Niylah, while you are stopped at the opposite end, pushed between Gabriel and Jordan. Another disciple walks over and places a helmet at your feet before taking one down to Octavia, all of you now standing in a row with disciple helmets nearby, waiting for what’s next. Two disciples stand near the stone, and two more stand near the door, everyone waiting in silence, but Gabriel can't resist the urge to whisper, “Are you okay?”

“Looks worse than it is.” You smirk at him, trying to ease his tension, and he smiles back, right before one of the disciples snaps, “No talking!”

Less than a minute later, the doors to the room slide open. Two disciples stop just outside the door as two more walk inside, taking up their posts. Behind them is Cadogan, followed by Bellamy and the man that is likely replacing Anders, whose name you don't know. Behind them is Clarke, unrestrained, her eyes searching the line of prisoners until her eyes lock with you. Her expression drops at the sight of all of you restrained, but it drops further when she sees the bruise already darkening around your eye. “Why are they still restrained? We had a deal.”

You look at her, your eyes glancing at Cadogan, who has taken up a spot in front of the stone. “Clarke, what is this? What deal?”

“He releases all of us, and I take him to the Flame.”

Bill turns around, his gaze falling to Clarke. “You'll forgive me if I have trust issues where you're concerned.”

He turns to look at the man replacing Anders. “Remove the restraints one at a time. Any violence will be met with lethal force.”

Bellamy looks at you, his expression a warning as he addresses your group. “No one is getting violent. It's a good thing, you're being released.”

The man moves down to Miller first, slipping off his restraints before motioning down to the helmet on the floor. “Helmet on to protect your memory.”

Miller leans down and grabs the helmet, turning to look at Clarke as the Anomaly powers up beside him. “You good with this?”  

She nods, and he pulls the helmet on and allows himself to be led into the Anomaly. All down the line the others are unrestrained and led into the green glow behind Miller: Hope, then Octavia, Niylah. The man skips over Raven, who gives him a strange look, and moves on to Echo, freeing the former spy with a guarded look. “Sending the fighters first, is that it?”

He shrugs a little, “Can't be too careful.”

After Echo is Jordan, and you put your hands out after him, waiting your turn, but the man in front of you steps back, leaving you, Gabriel, and Raven behind, still restrained. Cadogan moves over to the stone and types in a code, the Anomaly closing behind Jordan, leaving the rest of you behind. You glance over at Clarke in confusion, wondering if this was part of the plan, and she gives you a look of worry, letting you know that it’s not. She steps towards Cadogan, a glare on her face. “What are you doing?”

“Ensuring you keep your part of the deal.”

Raven shifts closer to you, glaring at Cadogan as she moves, her lip curling into a sneer. “He didn't send them to Sanctum.”

“Correct.” He turns to look at her, smiling at her, and you want nothing more than to launch yourself at him and wipe the smile from his face. “And thank you for demonstrating why I didn't send you with them.”

Gabriel clicks his tongue, his gaze shifting to his feet before moving back up to Cadogan. “We know how the stone works.”

“Also correct.” You shake your head, confused, because you don't have knowledge of the stone in the way that Gabriel and Raven do. If anything, Echo and Hope know more about the stone than you, meaning they should be here too. Clarke seems to think the same thing, because she looks over at you before her eyes lock with Cadogan’s. “My twin doesn't know about the stone, so why is she here?”

The realization hits you as you look at her, the worry on her face to have you still among the dangers of Bardo. You shift your gaze to the cult leader and deadpan, “I’m an insurance policy. If you don't get him the Flame, I'm assuming that I'm the first to go.” 

Bill turns his condescending smile to you, confirming your suspicions. “Another correct answer.”

You glare at him, your mind on your friends and not your safety. “Where are they?” 

“They're safe, as I promised they would be. I said nothing about releasing them on Sanctum.”

Clarke turns on Bellamy, her anger radiating off of her in waves. “You knew about this?”

Bellamy looks at her, lost, clearly unaware of Bill’s plans, which the Shepherd confirms. “He doesn't know where they are, only I do. I told you, Clarke, I don't trust you. I do, however, trust the love you have for your friends and your twin, and once I have the Key and the Last War begins, they'll all be freed. At which point, each of you will be welcome to fight alongside us, and if you choose not to, well, we'll save you anyway. That is what we mean when we say, ‘for all mankind’.”

He turns, eyes moving over to the new Anders. “Doucette, please release the others, so we can retrieve the Key.”

Doucette walks over to Raven and pulls off her restraints as Cadogan once again opens the Anomaly, this time to Sanctum. Raven leans down to grab her helmet, and Doucette walks over to you next. You stick out your arms, waiting for your freedom, your brain already contemplating all the ways you’re going to get Clarke and the others out of this, when Bill’s voice calls out, “Not her.”

You look around the disciple to stare at the cult leader in shock. “What?”

“Your restraints will remain on, Miss Griffin. You killed 10 disciples in our oxygen farm, attacked First Disciple Anders before his death, and have assaulted countless guards since arriving on Bardo, two of them earlier today. I trust you even less than I trust Clarke, which is why you will remain restrained and at my side.”

From across the room, Bellamy speaks for the first time since your friends were sent away, his expression concerned as he looks at his leader. “Sir, I don't think that’s really necessary.”

“And I think it is. I’m sure you're aware of what she’s capable of more than any of us.” Bellamy’s expression drops a little, his mind clearly playing through an assortment of memories in which you fight or kill anyone that gets in your way. Cadogan notes his expression, stating with a nod, “That is why I’m keeping her restrained.”

You roll your eyes and drop your hands, accepting that, for now, your restraints will stay on. You're hesitant to push Cadogan in this moment, when everything is so tense and you’re surrounded by a room full of guards. You’re less concerned about your own safety and more concerned about the others, not wanting to do anything that’ll put Clarke or your friends in danger. You glance over at your twin, and you can tell that she wants to argue, but you shake your head at her, telling her you’re fine, you’ll be okay, and that none of this is as bad as it seems. You see her sigh a little before accepting the message, leaning down to pick up her own helmet. 

You grab your helmet as Gabriel is freed, and Cadogan turns and begins to give orders. “Disciples, I want most of you ahead of us. Weapons hot, remain in ghost mode, and take down anyone that is armed. Bellamy and Doucette will go ahead of me and the troublesome twin, and then Gabriel, Raven, and Clarke will bring up the rear, along with the remaining disciples. Is that clear?”

Everyone mumbles their assent and agreement, and you are pushed across the room, over to Cadogan’s side. You glare as you look at him, Bellamy moving past the two of you to stand in front of you, and you shift your glare to the back of his head. Because he barely fought for you. He seems more than content to leave you chained up like an animal. You hope he can feel your anger as Cadogan directs everyone to pull their helmets on, which you do clumsily, thanks to your restraints, and you hope Bellamy can feel your anger when you all step into the Anomaly and come out the other side on Sanctum. 

Except, instead of appearing in Gabriel’s tunnel under his camp, you’re in the palace, surrounded by armed guards. Russell is sitting on a throne made of skulls, wearing Grounder clothes, and you look around in confusion as you reach up to tug your helmet off. Clarke does the same thing, speaking the thought on all of your minds as you look around the room in confusion. “What the hell happened here?”

Murphy, who you didn't notice until this moment, is sitting across from Russell, his hands restrained, a chessboard in front of him. He smiles a little as he takes in the arrival of your group, but it drops at Clarke’s question. He glances briefly at Russell before deadpanning, “Oh, gee. Where to begin.”

You look around the room again, at the chaos that has apparently ensued since your departure, and you glance over at Clarke, wondering if it was like this when she left. But given the expression on her face and the confused look that she turns towards you, it wasn't. Which means your people managed to ruin not just Bardo, but Sanctum too. You can only hope that things here aren't that bad, though as you look towards Russell again, you're not sure that’s the case.

But nothing can be as bad as your time on Bardo, right?

-

next chapter

[itstittycitybaby]

What is Lost is Once Found Again (Lin Beifong x fem! reader)

 A/N: this is the angst fic and i have finished editing it. been feeling down lately because of some things so whens a better time to write something angsty? also reader is a firebender bc i feel like firebenders do not get enough love. enjoy yall. 

warnings: angst, emotional/physical abuse, one homophobic slur.

You saw how happy they were. They couldn’t keep their hands off of each other. The bouquet of flowers fell from your hands. Its petals falling like the pieces of your heart that shattered. Though, this was your fault wasn’t it? You had introduced them after all and they hit it off. The rest was history. She laughed; Tenzin had made her laugh. Your vision became blurry from the tears in your eyes. You wanted to scream. You had been too late. Lin looked over and waved at you. There was a grin on her face, something you never really saw from her. You swallowed the cry that threatened to claw its way out. The urge to vomit was strong. You waved back weakly. Their attention turned from you and back to them. The fresh wild flowers you had picked for her were now damaged. It didn’t matter anymore. She looked so happy standing next to him. Lin’s green eyes looked a bit soft as she noticed the bouquet. It was a rare sight to see her so happy. Her voice sounded blurry and muddled. It felt like you were watching a movie play out on the big screen of a theatre. Tenzin looked concerned at your state of being. Here you were standing in front of them but you seemed gone. Lin’s voice snapped you out of your daze. 

Her strong features pulled in concern as she called your name softly. “Are you alright?” No, you weren’t. You couldn’t tell Lin how much it hurt to see how happy she was with Tenzin. You couldn’t confess your feelings that you’ve been harboring for a while. Tenzin was your best friend and you didn’t want to ruin how joyful he was. If he knew he’d step aside and let you have her. He’d swallow it all down just for you. Blinking, your lips quivered. “I-I was just going to visit my father’s grave,” you lied. Their faces dropped; they knew how important your father had been to you. “Is that what you were going to give him,” Tenzin asked gently, head motioning to the now ruined flowers on the gravel. At that moment you hated Tenzin. He was so soft and kind that you felt guilty about falling in love with his girlfriend. You nodded, “Doesn’t matter anyways. I-I gotta go...see you later.” They tried to stop you; they called after you but you ignored them. She was gone now. You were too late. They were so enamored with each other now it didn’t matter anymore. The ache in your heart was deep. You felt anchored in the cold icy waters of the ocean but you couldn’t reach out. Cement blocks held your feet every time as you dragged through the sand. The ache in your bones became numb with the cold and every time you screamed you’d choke on the water. He makes her happy, you told yourself. I was too late.

Neither of them really talked to you anymore. It was expected, though. They were a new couple in the honeymoon phase. That’s how your mother put it, the alcohol in her system making her words slur and her movements clumsy. Your father’s anniversary of his death had passed a couple days ago and your mom became even more depressed. You fought the urge to scorch the walls that night when she spat her venomous words towards you. They were a sharp blade but you didn’t care. It would sink its blades into your skin and blood would rise. Eventually, it all became numb. Her sharp hilt of words became numb once more. “It’s your fault he’s dead. It’s your fault he’s gone.” The words stung but she was right. Your father’s death was your fault. “You know,” Tenzin started, his legs swinging off the steps of your porch. “My family will always welcome you.” It was cold that night. The freezing air bit your fingers and the wind whipped your clothes around. Tenzin had come to check up on you. He always did every anniversary. “I know,” you said softly. “I know.”

“No wonder she doesn’t talk to you anymore. A handsome and kind man sweeps Lin off of her feet. I’d do the same.” Your mother was sober this morning. She was back to her usual jabs but the eggs in front of you helped drown her out. You clenched your fork tightly, your knuckles turned white. “Too bad you couldn’t get him first.” You slammed your fist down on the counter. Flames flickered in your hands. Its tongues threatened to burn the counter you sat at. Your mother whipped around, eyes growing wide at your burning hands. You could feel how scared she was. She didn’t bother you anymore that day.

Dammit Tenzin! Lin’s room was warm compared to your frozen house. You always envied her for it but not tonight. You held her tight as she vented about her boyfriend. Well, now ex boyfriend. The thought made you scoff. Pema was a sweet girl but she was selfish. Incredibly selfish. “Am I just unloveable?” You snapped out of your thoughts. Lin didn’t shed any tears but her voice sounded so broken. “No Lin no,” you said softly, rubbing her shoulder supportively. “Tenzin’s just a dumbass. Pema is selfish and wanted to break two people’s happiness. Tenzin was stupid to got for it. You are loveable Lin.” I love you. Lin swallowed thickly; you could see her fighting the tears. “It’s stupid to cry over.” “No,” you exclaimed, pulling her into your chest. “It’s something perfectly justified to cry over! If you wanna cry you should, it’s good to cry.” “Heh. Thanks.”

 You smiled softly. The moon shone on her pale features beautifully through her bedroom window. You had snuck out that night but your mom had drunk herself to sleep. You couldn’t help but think how selfish Pema was to break two people apart. While you had kept your mouth shut and swallowed the hurt, she paraded around with Tenzin. Lin’s bedroom window was open after she helped you in. You felt guilty about throwing a small rock near her window. But, when you heard Tenzin had broken up with her from some gossip in town, you made haste to Lin. The box of fudge from the bakery you had bought for her was almost empty from eating both of your feelings. “Please don’t hurt him,” Lin said softly in your arms. Her eyes were heavy and her breathing was more shallow. “I’ll try not to,” you joked. She laughed. For the first time that night she laughed and your heart swelled at the thought. “Night Lin,” you whispered, setting her gently onto the bed. She snored softly, causing your heart to swell. You kissed her head and ventured home. 

You swung your feet from Lin’s bathroom counter. Tenzin and Lin hadn’t talked in a little over a year. Being your best friend the two of you talked and you gave clipped answers when he’d ask about her. Anytime you saw Pema you felt the rage and felt flames in your palms threatening to burst. You had yelled at him for an hour about how stupid and selfish he was. Aang had to come outside and see what all the ruckus was about. “Fuck,” you said tightly. You came back to the present from the stinging pain of the rubbing alcohol. “Sorry,” Lin muttered. For being such a hardass she was gentle when she needed to be. The cotton ball was soft on your temple, giving you some relief. At least the nosebleed stopped, but your eye was beginning to swell. “She can’t be doing this to you anymore,” she said softly, her brows worrying. For being nineteen, Lin  looked pretty mature. Though, she had always been more stern and responsible even as a kid. 

“It’s fine,” you muttered, brushing it off. You winced at the alcohol again. “No it’s not,” she replied sternly. You could see her green eyes flare up but there was concern and worry underneath it. “If you need somewhere to stay you can stay with me. I don’t want you to have to go through this anymore.” You didn’t interrupt her rant. Interrupting Lin is the equivalent to poking a grumpy old bear/ “What happened this time?” You sighed. You really didn’t want to have this conversation. Lin was open minded about certain things but you weren’t sure about being attracted to the same gender. It was still something you yourself were coming to terms with. Your mother had found out and the glass bottle shattered on the wall. It was meant for your head. “Just her being her usual self. Getting mad at something,” you clipped. Lin could tell you weren’t telling the whole story but she let it drop, thankfully. “All done,” she said. “Thanks.” She nodded in reply. “Do you need to stay here tonight?” “I don’t wanna intrude. I can stay at Kiki’s.” Kiki’s was the bakery you had bought the box of fudge for Lin when Tenzin broke up with her. The owner was always kind to you and knew about your struggles. He was warm hearted and offered you a place to crash from time to time. He reminded you of your father. Lin shook her head. “You’re staying here tonight. Besides, I just got this place and I want to spend time with you.” Your heart warmed at her words. An unrequited crush, two years strong. How sad. Your mother’s words rang in your ears. “How could she ever love a fag like you?” 

It was raining that morning. Kiki’s had hired you as a baker and offered you the room upstairs. Even though firebenders were known to be ambitious, passionate, and more aggressive than others, you had no drive or ambition. You didn’t know what you wanted in life but baking was something you were passionate about. “I’m gonna be out,” you shouted over your shoulder. “Alright be safe,” Maro, the store owner, called out from the back. Swinging your satchel over your shoulder you grabbed the box of leftover donuts for Lin. You balanced the two coffee cups on the box and swiftly left the place. Your bright blue bicycle rested on the side of the bakery. As you mounted your bike you smiled, excited to see Lin today. The two coffee cups sat in the cup holders on the sides of the basket while the donuts sat safely in the basket.The wind whipped through your hair and the rain drizzled lightly. The rain was light but you peddled quickly so the food wouldn’t be ruined. Lin’s wasn’t too far Kiki’s either. It felt freeing to be peddling down the hills; your worries flew away with the sweeping wind. Her apartment came into view. The thought of seeing her made you peddle faster. You placed your bike on the side of the building and pounded up the stairs. You held the box of donuts tightly in your hands, shielding it from the now pouring rain. Your heart quickened as you reached her front door. You had left Kiki’s at eight so she had to be up by now. You knocked on her door. Faintly, you could hear her footsteps. Lin greeted you with a blanket on her shoulders and a white tank top under it. Black sweats hugged her body nicely. The dark circles under her eyes were prominent in the bright gray morning. “What a surprise,” she said, the corners over her lips tugging upwards. You chuckled, “Had some leftovers and decided to visit. It’s been a while.” Her eyes lightened up at the sight of coffee and the delicious pastries. Lin held the door for you as you balanced the goodies and stepped into her apartment.

“Talked to Tenzin finally.” You almost choked on the sprinkled donut you were eating. Lin held her coffee cup in her hands as she glanced down at her kitchen counter. Her plain glazed donut sat on a napkin untouched. You gulped your food down. “That’s..great. What’d he say?” Lin chuckled at your answer. “He apologized, actually.” She sipped her black coffee. “Oh…” you trailed off. You weren’t sure how to respond. He had broken up with her three years ago and now apologized? “I don’t feel anything about it anymore. I was surprised, honestly.” You hummed, sipping your hot chocolate. “Took him long enough.” Lin snorted, “It did. I just can’t help but wonder...why.” You shot a confused glance her way, digging into the box for another sweet. A chocolate donut, this time. You missed the smile Lin had as she saw your childlike wonder and excitement about something so small as a pastry. “No one seems to have any interest in me anymore. Can’t help but wonder if I’m going to die alone,” she joked, taking another sip of her drink. You could hear a bit of sadness in her voice though. Passion bubbled in your chest and before you could think better you opened your mouth. “You’re not gonna die alone Lin. You’re sweet and kind and compassionate. You care about the people you love and are fiercely loyal. You’re intelligent and observant and also snarky. You’re just so….perfect!” The creeping anxiety surged when the answer you met with was silence. Muffled laughter escaped Lin’s lips as she tried to keep a straight face. It was rare; her body shook and the giggles turned into laughter. It rang in your ears and your heart swelled at the perfect sound. Before you could stop yourself, you kissed her.Her lips tasted like coffee and mint. She smelt like earth, paper, and leather. Her lips were soft and plush. Your eyes widened and immediately you pulled back. “I-I’m so s-sorry I-,” you sputtered, scurrying away from her. Lin just stared. There was no expression on her face as she looked at you. You felt tears run down your cheeks before you had a chance to stop them. A heavy lump sat in your throat and you dashed to get your bag. You left without another word, slamming Lin’s door behind you. She didn’t even try to stop you. 

“I’m a fucking idiot,” you sobbed, the rain pouring, soaking you to the bone. You peddled faster, sobs unleashing from your throat. The road was hard to see from the rain and your blurry vision. You didn’t care, if something or someone hit you you would accept your fate. Hell, that would be a good one. Better than losing Lin for good. Once you wheeled your bike to it’s spot you dashed into Kiki’s. Customers sat at tables leaving the workers distracted so you bolted upstairs. You didn’t feel like having Maro interrogate your crying right now. As much as you loved the big jolly man, you couldn’t let him see you like this. You changed out of your wet clothes and threw on something comfortable. For the rest of the day you let your blankets embrace you and cried your heart out. Eventually, you drifted off to sleep.

It was five pm once you woke up again. The memory of kissing Lin and acting so stupid made you curse. Tears threatened to spill again and you trembled. A soft knock snapped you out of your thoughts. “Come in,” you croaked. Maro opened the door poking his head in. “Are you alright?” The dam broke loose. Instantly you were a sobbing mess again. The man who was almost like your father closed the door quickly and held you in his arms. “What happened,” he cooed, rocking you back and forth. You told him everything;about your mother, your father, and Lin. After you were finished he kissed the top of your head. “Give her some time. She’ll come around with an answer for you soon. She’d be lucky to have you.” “Thanks Maro,” you sniffled, wiping your eyes. A few moments of silence stretched. You didn’t believe his words, something told you that you pushed Lin away for good.“I think I’m gonna have to leave.” The giant man beneath you squawked. “I need to learn how to control my firebending still. I’ve shut it away for so long, I think it’s time now.” Maro sighed, “I knew this day would come. You’re sure of it? What if Lin comes for you?” You shook your head. “I don’t think she will Maro.” “Alright. When you come back, you have a home here at Kiki’s. Y’know that right?” “I-I know. Thank you Maro.”

The next morning Maro and his brother waved you off. Maro cried as he gave you one last hug and a box of sweets for the go. You felt tears well up in your eyes as you said goodbye to your only family. “T-thank you Maro for everything. I never deserved your kindness.” “Yes you do, you’re family. You’re my daughter,” Maro blubbered. Even Maro’s brother who was a stone faced man had tears in his eyes You smiled. Your lips quivered and tears streamed down your face. “I love you guys,” you choked out. “I-I’ll be back soon I promise.” With one last goodbye you made your way to Tenzin and his family for a farewell.Tenzin was sad to see you go but he understood. Some journeys were meant to be traveled alone. Aang wished you the best of your travels and sent a wool cloak with you. It was soft and the warmest thing you ever owned. Pema was there, and you were civil with her, but after what she had done to Lin you didn’t see her the same. Tenzin had given you an amulet he was keeping for you and it hung around your neck proudly. You hurried to the docks of Republic City. Missing the boat would certainly add to your already dampened spirits. As you swept through the streets you couldn’t help but think of Lin. The wounds were still fresh but you trudged on. Like a coward, you ran.

Your room was barren and cold. ‘Had it always been this cold,’ Lin thought. The baker, Maro, looked sad today. It was unusual for he was joyful and warm. But today his flame had been blown at, the smoke curling around his heart. Lin was paralyzed when you had kissed her. She couldn’t move until it was too late. A white envelope sat on your desk. Lin. She ran to the desk and ripped it open. As she read it, her eyes widened and her eyes felt watery. Dammit. She was too late. Lin flung the letter on the floor and bolted to the docks. The white parchment paper sifted through the air gracefully until it fell on the ground.

Lin,

I’m sorry. I did what must be done.

 Goodbye,

xx

“No!” Lin cried out as the boat sailed away from view. Tears spilled from her cheeks and her teeth clenched. Her fists were balled tightly and her face twisted in anguish. You were gone, forever. She stood on the busy docs;people went around her throwing dirty looks her way. She didn’t care. They went around her mumbling under their breaths. She had been too late. “Line five, ship is boarding, line five, ship is boarding,” the guy called out. Lin perked up. Were you still here? Quickly, she scanned the line. Her heart stopped. She recognized the familiar body and the wool cloak shrouded protectively across their shoulders. Lin bounded over to you. Her hand grabbed your wrist tightly and she pulled you out of the line. “Hey-” your eyes widened as you saw her. “Lin? What are you-” “You’re an idiot you know that?” You gulped. You didn’t think Lin would talk to you anymore but her anger wasn’t unexpected. “I-I’m sorry,” you said softly, averting her intense gaze. “I-I wasn’t thinking clearly and I admit that. But if you’ve come here to ridicule me-” Lin smashed your lips with hers. A muffled squeak in surprise left you but you melted into her touch. Lin’s hands held your face tightly and her chest brushed up against yours. You sighed into the kiss allowing her tongue to enter your mouth and gently sucking on yours. She pulled away;both of you out of breath. Your cheeks heated up at the realization that the love of your life liked you back. “How long have you loved me,” Lin asked softly. Her eyes shone with fondness as she looked at you. “You know when you started dating Tenzin?” She nodded. “I was gonna confess to you then.” Lin’s eyes widened in shock. “Why didn’t you tell me?” You smiled sadly, “You looked so happy. I didn’t want to ruin that.” Lin kissed you again. Her hands held your waist in a tight grip and she bent you lower. You giggled, grabbing her face for support. There were tears in her eyes as she looked at you. You felt your eyes start to water and you laughed softly. “I love you,” Lin whispered, tears threatening to spill. “Don’t you ever leave me again.” You smiled, you were crying again but these were happy tears instead. Gently, she wiped the spilling tears from your cheeks with her thumbs. They felt a bit rough but you couldn’t complain. You nodded, swallowing thickly. “I love you too Lin.”

[pinkykitten]

Hey Dad

The Good Doctor Neil Melendez x teen! platonic reader

Specific/Warnings: mentions of jumping from one foster home to another, accident, surgery, angst, fluff, one-shot, requested, race neutral reader, teen reader, platonic relationship

Words: 2,220

Requested: By anon Could you do a Melendez x Teen!reader oneshot where he fosters her and she’s like really chaotic and thinks he’s like all her others foster parents and he seems so lost, and she gets into an accident and he does the surgery and that’s when she changes and calls him dad pls?

Authors Note: I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO END THIS ONE SO I HOPE YALL LIKE THIS ANGST BUT THEN FLUFF PIECE. I HOPE ALSO I GOT THE REQUEST GOOD CUZ THIS ONE MEANS A LOT TO ME. I HOPE U ALL LIKE THIS ROLLERCOASTER. 

“She comes tonight?” Claire asked curiously to her boss. “I can’t believe you actually signed up for something like this.”

“I saw her a couple years ago on the E.R. and I felt bad for her. She was hopping from one foster parent to the other and that’s no life for a kid. She seems like a great person so why not help her and let her stay with me until they have a proper home for her.”

Claire couldn’t help but fall in love more with her boss. “I think that is the sweetest thing you have ever said. I never knew you had this side to you.” She nudged him. 

He rolled his eyes and showed a picture of you to the rest of his colleagues. “I have her room all ready but I’m really nervous.”

The whole room erupted in a symphony of awes. 

“You’re so cute,” Claire smiled wickedly as she messed with Neil’s doctor’s coat.

Neil rolled his eyes, “I’m just saying, this is a new thing for me. I’ve never had a child. I don’t know what she’ll like, whats her favorite food? What’s her favorite color? What does she like to do?”

“Well, thats the beauty of it. You’ll get to talk to her and know her. Maybe nobody has really asked her that question.”

“I want to be the perfect foster dad. Is that too much to ask?”

Claire placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. She wished in her life somebody like Neil was in her life. A father figure that was actually caring. “Nobody is perfect Neil. What matters is that you try your hardest and listen to her thoughts.”

Neil got dinner ready for you. He ordered from everywhere, not knowing what you enjoyed eating. 

He was setting up the table when the doorbell rang. 

Neil closed his eyes, getting himself prepared and ran to the door. As he opened it up you were there. His pride and joy. 

“Hey Y/N! Come in, come in.” He brought his arm up as he welcomed you into his home.

You looked around suspiciously. For a single man he lived quite nice. You knew he was a doctor but you didn’t know he lived this richly. You met him a couple of times during your trips to the E.R. and always opened up about your life in foster care but you never knew he was going to take you in one day. You were very surprised and shocked to see him make such an effort. But you were over foster parents. They let you down and didn’t truly care about you. Nobody really wanted a kid like you, nobody really wanted Y/N L/N.

With no enthusiasm you brought your suitcase to the entrance, “thanks. Want me to put this in a room?”

“Yeah, we’ll put it in your room.”

Your room? You thought. Not many foster parents gave you your own room. They always stuck you with the other children or put you on the couch. It was always the same. 

Neil led you up the stairs, picking up your suitcase for you. He led you to a big room that was spacious. It was plain but very beautiful with cream colored bed decorations and a light grey wall. 

“I didn’t want to decorate it and paint it in case you didn’t like it. You can pick what you want if you’d like tomorrow. And you have your own bathroom.”

You were stone cold, speechless. You never had this love before. You felt your heart was about to burst. “This is all for me?” Tears blurred your vision. 

“Yeah, I hope you like it.”

“It’s great, thank you for this.” It was a beautiful room. It was more than you could ask. Nobody ever did this for you. You touched the sheets and they felt like silk between your fingers. Neil gave you the best of the best. This meant a lot but you were still not certain. You still had doubts. 

“I got dinner in case you were hungry, its downstairs.”

You were hungry and your stomach growled. You were led downstairs and on the kitchen table was a feast. There were every type of dishes there. Your mouth was salivating as you smelled the aroma. 

“I didn’t know what you liked so I got everything.” Neil chuckled bashfully. He was such a dad and he was realizing this. 

You laughed as you dug into everything, “can I say that all this is my favorite?”

Neil sat down beside you, “I’ll make note of that.”

Maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad, you thought. Maybe this was going to be fun and someone in your life you could depend on and trust. Someone who would protect you no matter what. 

You munched away as you stared more at his house. He lived in a mansion. You were astounded as to how one person could live like this. “Your house is amazing. When I grow up I want to live like this.”

Neil chuckled, “being in a house like this, when you’re one person its not all that its cracked up to be. Trust me.”

You played around with your dish as the air became awkward. “So whats the grossest surgery you’ve ever done?”

Neil wiped his mouth and sat back with his hands cupping the back of his head, “oh you wouldn’t believe this.”

“Try me doctor.”

Neil smiled, “well this one time this old lady came in with pain in her stomach well right when we lifted her dress she had waste come all out of her and onto me. It was like an explosion, right before my eyes.” Neil started to giggle loudly as the memory came back to him. “That’s when I was new.”

You covered your mouth from the disgust. “You’re right, I don’t believe it. That’s so disgusting oh my gosh.” You pushed your food away. “I think I lost my appetite.”

“Now what about you? Are you like the kids these days that go and dance on Tik Tok? Or are about sipping that tea.”

The drink you were sipping almost came out of your nose. You busted out laughing hysterically. “I can’t believe this, you are such a dad that’s its almost cringy.”

“Cringy? You lost me.” It was the truth, Neil was lost. As a foster parent he didn’t know what kids were into these days (he just did a quick search before you came) and he wanted to try his hardest. He wanted to be the best for you, he wanted to prove to you that he was serious about this. 

“You got a lot to learn. But no, I’m not those types of kids. I instead like to read and draw, it brings my mind out of reality and into my own imagination of something better.”

“I do the same with surgery.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well I block out the rest of the world when I am performing surgery. This person is depending on me to help them so they can feel better and get back to their old lives. I hope to save them from reality in doing my best in saving their lives.”

“Wow,” you looked at his hands resting on the table. Those hands did miracles. “I would like to do that when I’m older. I want to help someone too.”

“Good goal.”

You were too much of a coward to open yourself up to love this person as your father. You were afraid he would leave you and not want you like the others. You couldn’t trust him. You blocked yourself from the world and nothing, nobody could stop the feeling. 

“Why don’t you trust me?” Neil patted your head. He wrapped you in his coat and hugged you tight, protective.

You had tears threatening to spill over. You wouldn’t let yourself succumb to the love that Neil was giving you. You couldn’t let yourself fall for something fake and then go through it all over again. Your heart couldn’t take it. 

You pushed Neil away, wiping your eyes. “No! Okay, no! I appreciate all that you did but they are going to take me away and they are going to tell you reasons to leave me. You are going to leave me. I won’t let that happen.”

“I’m not going to do any of that. Y/N I would never leave you sweetheart. I know it is hard to trust me but I am here for and I always will be. You didn’t such harsh treatment and I’m sorry for that but I am going to help you with it and I want to be the one to raise you and be there for you. It’s a hard thing to ask but please trust me on this. Please.”

You shook your head, “I can’t trust no more.”

You put on your hoodie and ran in the pouring rain. 

“Y/N! Y/N!”

You didn’t stop. The rain was cold and you almost forgot how you got into the conversation with Neil. 

It was about a woman. 

You weren’t jealous, you just had been through something like this already. Foster parent finds a new match and then they want to start their own family, without you. It was an ongoing and continuous thing. 

You didn’t know where you were going and what you were to do but you couldn’t go back and probably Neil wouldn't want you back. You wished the new family all the love in the world. 

The rain made the sidewalks slippery. It was coming down cats and dogs. You could barely make out what was in front of you. Rain dripped down your nose and onto your drenched clothes. 

You needed to go across the busy street in order to get to the other side. You thought the cars stopped. You went ahead and your life flashed before your eyes. As soon as your shoes touched the middle of the crosswalk a car tried to push the brakes but the road was so slippery it skidded to you and hit you so hard your body flew high and far. It all seemed in slow motion. What you didn’t know was Neil had ran after you and was on the side walk opposite from you crying and sobbing a mess. 

“Y/N no please no. Please sweetheart please don’t leave me like this.” He cradled your bruised face. Your eyes closed as you were knocked out and blood dripped down your nose. 

Neil brought you into his car and drove you fast, straight to the hospital to run tests and perform surgery on you. 

“Are you sure you can take this Dr. Melendez?” Clair asked, worried for her friend. 

“Just please let us do this! Please! Every second that passes by with us talking we are wasting time! I need to do this, I need to make sure she is okay!” Neil had tears stream down his wet cheeks. You were his life. You were his daughter. 

As Neil performed surgery on you he couldn’t help but whisper, “please don’t leave me Y/N, please don’t leave me.” He saw your precious face that made him smile. There was no way he would leave you. You were his family. 

His hands shook as he grabbed onto the scalpel, he gained his composure and needed to save your life. There were no if and’s or buts you were going to live and he was going to make sure of this. 

He completed the surgery and you were in your bed, out and quiet which was different for him since you were always talking and laughing and being chaotic. 

He was there with you through it all. 

He held onto your hand as you laid there. “Y/N if you can hear me know that you are my kid okay. I don’t plan on giving you up. I want you to be part of the family. I’m sorry if I didn’t show that in my actions or prove it but there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I don’t see you as a foster kid, I see you as my daughter. Forever and always, I love you.” He cried softly. 

Your eyes fluttered open. With a weak voice you said, “I love you too dad.”

Neil opened his eyes. He thought this was dream. Was it real? You called him dad. His heart almost exploded. “Y/N oh my God you’re awake! Oh thank God.” He embraced you tightly, almost fretting to let go. He kissed the top of your head as tears dropped lightly on your skin. 

“I’m sorry dad for making you scared and for running away. I was just afraid of trusting and opening my heart but I don’t want to run away anymore and I don’t want to be alone anymore. Can I stay dad?”

Neil cupped your face. “Can you stay? Of course you can stay sweetheart. Don’t apologize. You are more brave and strong than you know.”

You chuckled as tears blurred your vision as well, “thanks dad for saving my life. You saved my life twice now.”

“Twice?”

You hugged Neil, “yeah you saved my life by performing surgery and you saved my life by becoming my dad. Thank you, forever and ever.

Tag list: @harrington-lover​​, @angelgl16​​, @perfectlybeautifulsuit​​, @hyehoney​​, @haven-prelude (wont let me tag), @leasly​​​, @totally-alexa21​​, @creamy-pasta-boi​​, @multireese​​, @fanfictionrecommendations-com​​, @prentisskelley​​, @malereaderforkpop (wont let me tag), @guardian-of-cookies, @justafangirl-97​​, @teenageshitposts (wont let me tag), @dippergravity (wont let me tag), @some-booty, @fromfoolishpeopletodeadpeople​​, @collectiveyou​​, @wtfisalltherandoms​​, @dirbel​​, @eastcoasthaven​​, @fangirl-4-life415 (wont let me tag), @melonreblogsstories​​​​

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[nad-zeta]

Mitsuhide Akechi- Nightmares

Hi, loves I hope everyone is doing well! (˶◕‿◕˶✿) Sorry I’ve been so slow with my matchups I am going to slowly start doing them this week in between writing me dissertation which was approved so yay (◕‿◕✿) that’s one less stress in life! So I dedicate this piece o trash fic to @choi-jiyu, and @i-sleep-like-napoleon, @nuttytani love ya gals, and I know yall love sneki boi just as much as I do! 

Fandom: Ikemen Sengoku 

Pairings: Mitsuhide x reader 

Genre: Fluff- with a touch o angst 

Warnings: Depression, nightmares, and anxiety 

Words: 2010

Comments: So I have been going through a tough time lately and need some sneki boi comfort (◕‿◕✿) soo I decided to write this self-indulgent fanfic, but I also know a few friends of mine is also going through a rough patch, and I didn’t know what to do to help, so I decided that his might brighten their days, even if it sucks! Love ya! 

It was a bright and sunny day. Rays of warm, lush sunshine streamed through your window, into your room. It was well past noon, and you were still nestled up in your warm bed. Despite the cheerfully chirping outside, you felt cold and numb. You had, had another one of your nightmares last night, leaving you an anxious mess. You wished you could stay in the comforts and safety of your bed all day, just hiding beneath the fluffy cover, but alas duty calls. You had no motivation or strength to get out of the safe haven of your bed. In fact, thanks to your nightly nightmares, you were now left exhausted and jittery. You laid back, head sinking deep into your pillow, staring up at the ceiling for a few more moments, letting your mind wander and play in the darkness. Soon it wandered a little too deep into the forest of memories, and fear and terror slowly started creeping in. They filled your head with lies, lies speaking of not being good enough, strong enough, pretty enough, they would whisper in your ears that no one would ever love you. It insisted that you were destined to live your life in fear and isolation, shackled in the chains of your own sorrow and trapped in the cell of your own mind forever. It was days like these when your fear manifested into the warden of your mind, taunting you in your cell. You felt like shards of shattered glass spread across the floor, beautiful and shimmering to all those looking from afar, yet soon to realize that you were actually a broken mess shattered beyond repair. 

The loud sounds of the birds chirping away outside your window sill brought you back. Your fingers gently ghosted your cheek to wipe away the tear that managed to escape.

You could hear the castle start to come alive with the buzz of the day. The maids began doing their rounds, to clean the castle rooms and hallways. You could hear the clinging of pots and pans in the distance, as Masamune made breakfast for the troublesome Mitsu’s.

At the thought of food, your stomach gave a loud growl. You sat up and rested your head on your knees, for a few moments, you really didn’t want to face the world today. The voices still ringing in your ears, coaxing you to lay back down and sleep away the numb pain, but you knew their tricks. Sleep never helped, for with sleep came the nightmares, always the same and ever leaving you to awaken in a state of terror. 

You got up and dressed, readying yourself for the day ahead of you, yet you just couldn’t shake this strange mood you were in. You dragged your feet through the castle halls leading you up to Nobunaga’s room, to get your list of duties for the day. You passed smiling faces, and chatty maids and the sense of irritation grew with each happy face you saw, it made you spiral further and further into the void of darkness. You reached Nobunaga’s door and gave a gentle knock, hoping, no praying he wouldn’t be in. Alas, he called out for you to enter. 

You entered into the mightly warlord’s room to see, Mitushide and Hideyoshi sitting before him drinking a cup of tea and exchanging light conversation. Today of all days you didn’t want to deal with small talk, cause you knew the second either of the men would ask you, what was wrong, you would breakdown into tears, and you most definitely did not want to do that. You wore your mask and sent the men a strained smile, leaving with your list of chores.

Litlle did you know your strained smile and faltering mask didn’t go unnoticed by the three men. Hideyoshi was the first to break the silence, “She seems down today, I wonder if we shouldn’t perhaps have given her the day off.” Nobunaga looked at his vassal worry for you clear in his ruby eyes, “Mitushide, I entrust you with our fireball, see to it that you chase away the demons that are clearly haunting her mind.” Mitushide gave the two men his snakelike smirk, although the worry and concern for you was evident even with his schooled expression, “Very well, my lord, I will now take my leave.” Nobunaga simply nodded as the kitsune left his room, to go and search for his dearest mouse.

He had spent the day watching you from the shadows, like a guardian angel of sorts. He knew that you weren’t in a particularly social mood, so he made sure to direct any pesky maids or warlords away from where you were working. He could see you spiralling further and further as the day progressed and it broke his heart. He would have approached you sooner, but for the first time in his life, he was afraid, he didn’t have the words to comfort you. He who always had some comeback or witty remark, he who armed himself with words, making his tongue his greatest weapon and strength, now couldn’t find the words.

Your work was finally done for the day, yet you still felt empty, you still felt numb, and you still felt terrified. You made your way to a secluded part of the castle garden and sat down on the fountain’s edge. You looked at your reflection in the water, “Gosh, you are pathetic, I don’t even recognize you.”

You were suddenly started by a smooth calming voice, “Dearest me, whoever are you talking to little mouse, for the only person I can see is, a beautiful princess who has been fighting her own demons alone for far too long.”

You turned away from the silver kitsune balling your hands in a tight fist, trying your best to hold back unshed tear stinging your eyes, “I don’t know what you are taking about Mitsuhide, as you can see I am perfectly fine, so you can go and find someone else to tease.”

Before you even knew what was happening, you were pulled into Mitsuhide’s lap and cradled in his arms. You looked up and the man shining in the moonlight. Blurred golden eyes filled your field of vision. Gentle fingertips soothingly traced up and down your arms in an attempt to calm you down. At this point, there was no stopping the tears, the dam wall had just broke, and hot tears came streaming down your face. You tried to speak once more, to insist that you were fine, that nothing was wrong, but your throat constricted and the words came out like hiccupping sobs.

Mitsuhide brought one of his hands to your cheek, to cradle your face, he carefully wiped away the tears with his thumb. His fingertips danced from your cheeks to make their way into your hair, gently he tightened his warm embrace on you, as he started to pull his fingers through his hair. “Would you like to talk about it little one, perhaps there is something I can do to assist you.”

You searched his golden orbs for traces of his usual tricks and teases but found none; instead, you saw a comforting affection and love for you, fill his molten eyes. As if reading your mind, he set your heart at ease, he spoke in a low soothing, comforting voice “I will not tease you tonight my dear, so please tell me what is the matter.”

You closed your eyes and buried your face in the crook of his neck, taking in his warm, comforting scent. The warm, soothing scent of incense- it smelt like a mix of agarwood, and cedar with hints of cinnamon and gun powder. When you were with him, you felt, calm and safe, your cluttered mind stopped buzzing and gave you a moment of peace, a moment of silence. Finally, you thought. 

You started to tell him of your nightmares, your past, doubts and of your depression and anxiety. You bore your heart to his mysterious moonlit kitsune, who simply sat and continued to stroke your hair while he listened to you speak.

His heart broke for you, he didn’t know what he could do to help, so he just sat there in silence and listened. He would occasionally tighten his warm embrace or give a small nod, as you continued to hiccup your way through your story. He knew all too well of the treacherous demons that would plague the mind with doubts and insecurities. All he could think to do by the end of your tale was to nuzzle your cheek and whisper words of reassurance in your ears. “You have put up a gallant fight my love, but you shall fight alone no more.”

He brushed away the last of your tears with his sleeves and kissed your forehead, nose and then…. Lips. Your eyes widened slightly in surprise, and finally, a real genuine smile graced your lips. Mitsuhide continued to whisper the sweetest of words in your ears, words filled with love and adoration, the words that were only meant for his one and only soulmate, words that were meant for you and you alone. 

Between the soft tracing of his fingers lovingly playing their way through your beautiful strands, the safe warmth radiating from Mitsuhide’s body as he embraced you, and the soft constant hammering of his heartbeat, you found yourself being lulled into a peaceful sleep. Mitushide looked down at your tear-stained face and made a silent vow to always be by your side, to love and protect you. His fingers moved from twirling your hair between his fingertips, to now lightly stroke your cheeks. With one final kiss of the nose, he gently stood up and tenderly cradled you in his arms. He moved swiftly through the hallways to take you back to your room. 

He carefully laid you down and tucked you in. He stayed for a few moments to watch over you and just before he turned to leave, he saw your delicate features contour in pain. You let out a few soft cries, you were having your nightmare again, tears started flowing down your face anew, but it wasn’t until one single word slipped from your lips that Mitsu was probed into action, “Mitsuhide.”

He was by your side in a split second, climbing in beneath the covers, pulling you closer to his broad chest and enveloping you in his warmth. “Hush now my love, I’m right here.”

As if sensing his presence, you turned around in his arms and nestled closer to him, hands sneaking their way into his kimono to pull him closer to you. You clung to him like your lifeline. He kissed your forehead and snaked his arms around you, to bring you to lay flush against him. He moved his hands to draw tiny circles on your back, “I’m right here, little mouse, there is no need to be afraid, I will slay all those who mean you harm.”

Your breaths started to even out, and the soft whispers of his voice seemed to chase away the very nightmare that had haunted you all throughout childhood into your adult life. You finally let out a content sigh and your facial features softened once more, a small smile coming to rest itself on your lips.

Mitsuhide watched over you for a while longer, nuzzling his nose into your hair and dropping small kiss. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, joining you in the land of dreams

Never again will your nightmares haunt you, never again will you be alone, for every night without fail Mitsuhide will pull you into his arms and chase away all your fears. He will watch over you like a guardian angel, swooping down from the heavens to pull you out of the dark void and back into the light. He will be by your side, every day and night to aid you in slaying the demons of your mind. He will go to the ends of the earth to fill your life and heart with unimaginable amounts of love and happiness 

Hope ya guys enjoyed! (◕ᴗ◕✿)

[hockeytrashgoblin]

Ice Cold ~Part 15

A/N: Yall i’m sorry that I am so trash at updating. I was planning to have this done on halloween and it just didn’t fucking happen. I forgot to even post on official halloween. You’re gonna get two parts tonight and I’m continuing it into november apparently. I hope you’re enjoying it. 

Also we got William’s POV for this one!

The panic I felt was almost debilitating. I woke up in Morgan's house on the couch instead of the woods where I expected to be and (y/n) was nowhere to be found. I sat up too quickly and dry heaved.

"William be gentle with yourself. There's vervain in your system." Morgan said calmly.

"I don't care. Where is she? Kas?"

"Kasperi is fine. He was watching behind you two. The ones who took her didn't even see him. He brought you back here."

"Well that's nice but what the fuck happened?"

"You were injected and they took her."

"Why was it so easy for them?"

"It was werewolves William." Mitch said quietly, coming into the room with Auston.

"God it's werewolf time again already?"

"Will, it happens every three months."

"What werewolves? There's not a known pack nearby, is there?" I asked Morgan.

"I've been keeping track of a nomadic pack for the past year or so. They always disappear and return at random times. There's something that keeps them coming back here though. I'm thinking the alpha of the pack is stationary and the Beta takes on alpha rolls when they go away. I haven't been able to find much information about them though. All I know is that crime goes up wherever they are."

"So you're telling me a group of nomadic criminal werewolves have (y/n) right now?" I said enraged that I let this happen. "This is my fault isn't it? If I had just listened to you they wouldn't have got her?"

"It would've made it harder. I didn't see an outcome where they didn't get her."

"God this is all my fault. I was supposed to protect her!"

"Now is not the time to play the blame game Willy." Mitch said sighing.

"Mouse is right. What are the next steps?"

"Well we need to get her back."

"Obviously." Auston rolled his eyes. "What do we need to do next?"

"I would suggest going back to the spot where the incident happened and gather scents. If William is up for it of course." Morgan said looking to me.

"I'm fine let's go."

"Good. I'm afraid we don't have much time. I'm going to talk to Tessa and the Kasperi and I will get supplies to prepare for whatever could be waiting for us. We'll meet you in the forest."

"Okay sounds good to me. Let's go Will." Mitch said clapping my back.

I led the way to where we were when it happened and we looked around for clues and scents. 

"Willy we need to hurry up. I've seen what happens. If there was ever a time to use your gift it's now."

"Mitch it's not a gift."

"Well whatever the fuck it is use it! She could die William. We need to get to her as quick as possible and our senses aren't as good as yours. There's so many scents." Auston said, annoyance clear in his tone.

"They're right. You need to do this right now or we could be too late to save her."

"She could die?"

"Yes. Or be taken far away and we would never find her again."

"That's not even kind of an option. I will find her, or I will die trying. No we need to go that way now." I said pointing south.

"You're sure?"

"Absolutely. Her scent goes south."

"There's an old abandoned hospital in the woods going south. That would match up with the vision right?" Mitch asked Morgan.

"It makes sense yes."

"Well then let's go."

We ran as a group as fast as we could. We had to run quite a ways away and we stopped once so I could feed to regain strength. It was only a few rabbits but it made me feel better.

"So what's the plan when we get there? How many of these things are there?" Auston asked, ready as ever to cause destruction. He was asking Morgan but I took a deep breath and answered instead.

"There's 6. It's a small pack."

"That's only some of them back then." Mo replied. "You're sure only 6?"

"Positive. There are 6 scents leading that way that aren't (y/n). Hers is there too but the others reek of dog."

"That's probably them then."

"So when we get there I'm guessing a surprise attack isn't going to work?"

"There's four of them around the perimeter but so far apart we could sneak through without harm. The fight will happen inside the building. William if you go first you will be killed. Auston and Kasperi go first, then I go, then you and Mitch. If we come in waves it will distract long enough for us to get an upper hand. This isn't up for discussion."

"After last time I'm not going against what you said Mo." I mumbled.

"Alright let go boys. The longer we wait the more serious condition she'll be in when we get there."

We were off again. I could smell more and more as we got closer. It hit me like a brick once I recognized one of the scents. I stopped short and everyone else except Mitch kept going ready to attack.

"Mitch I know who has her. God she must be terrified. We need to go now."

"Morgan said to wait."

"I don't give a fuck I need to get her away from them! Mitch they're hurting her. Imagine if it was Auston."

"Okay. Okay let's go. We need to get her."

We ran in and her blood was the first thing that hit me. It was overwhelming, suffocating almost. I hated it. We got to the room and after a quick survey there was two wolves down. Kas was fighting one, Mo had another and Auston had one cornered. The one I really wanted wasn't in here though. I took a deep breath and followed his scent to another room just off this room. I ran up and pushed him by the neck to the wall. He laughed.

"I was wondering when you'd get here."

"What the fuck did you do to her?"

"In my defense, the moon was full and I was left unsupervised."

"What did you do?"

"She brought it on herself. She shouldn't hurt people William."

"What the fuck did you do Peter? I don't give a fuck what she shouldn't do. What did you do?" I hissed strangling him a little.

"I let my brothers attack her. If I can't have her neither can you. You're too late."

"What? No I.." I took a second to let my senses go and that's what he was waiting for. I ended up on the ground.

"You think I took satisfaction in killing her? I didn't. I loved her. You did this to her. If you had just left her alone she would be alive." 

I kicked him off of me, through the door, and into the bigger room. I flew through the air at him and pushed him into the ground so hard the concrete broke and I dislocated his arm and broke his spine. He let out a weak whimper.

"I will kill you with my bare fucking hands, do you hear me?!"

"You wouldn't. You're a fucking coward. You'd never kill me in front of her."

I pushed a little harder on his neck. I felt a snap and he laughed with blood gurgling out of his mouth before his eyes rolled back. I pushed harder until I heard his heart stop beating. I heard a loud howl followed by one more in the distance. 

"They know their alpha is dead." Mitch said quietly bringing me back to real life.

"Oh my God (y/n)!"

"She's alive. Barely but she's alive." Mo told me without looking up from what he was doing.

"William.." she whispered.

"I'm here. Baby I'm here." I ran to her and held her head on my lap.

"You killed him..?"

"I thought they'd killed you. I lost my temper. I'm so so sorry."

"Don't be sorry." She coughed and winced. "I'm glad."

"Don't talk (y/n) just let us help you be okay again."

"If I can breathe I'm okay Willy."

"Honey you're not. Mo what do we do?"

"We give her blood."

"What if she dies?"

"Then you have her forever. What happens if she dies without it?"

"Fuck.."

"William just turn me. Please? I don't want to die right now. I can't. Not now, please Will."

"Baby I don't know."

"Just please don't let me die. I can't explain right now just please someone do something."

"Mo what's the outcome."

"We don't have time for that. Will you need to give her blood now. Either you do or I will." Mitch said frantically.

"Like hell you will."

"Then do something." He yelled. I looked at (y/n) and she was crying.

"Aus please get him out of here?"

"No Auston stay, Kasperi go with Mitch for some air." Morgan said, trying to stitch up a particularly deep gash in her thigh. The boys left and Mo looked at me. "Mitch is right you need to make a decision."

"William please?" She cried trying to grab my hand. She squeezed but it was so weak that I started crying too. "Babe don't cry."

"I know what I need to do." I used my teeth to tear at my wrist. Once it was bleeding I held it to her lips. "I'm sorry sweetheart but you have to drink. Please please drink."

She didn't say anything, she just started to suck. It was so light, I didn't think she was going to get enough to help her at this rate. She stopped sucking and I thought she was going to throw up but she just closed her eyes and her hands that were holding me fell to the ground beside her.

"God no, please no, no."

"William calm down. You're okay. She's going to be okay."

"She didn't get very much blood, she was so weak.." I cried as I pet her hair. I punched a wall in frustration and Auston grabbed (y/n). "No no no where are you taking her." 

"William calm down. We're going home. Auston is going to carry her there. Not up for discussion."

I was about to protest but they were already gone. We were back in no time and I sat beside her bed. I held her hand and sat with her silently for hours. I was so worried she wasn't going to wake up. Morgan kept coming in to check on her, he was a doctor before he became a vampire so he was the only one I trusted. He took out her stitches to reveal her wounds healing up quickly.

"You have to stop this William. Her wounds are healing. You did it in time."

"But it's going so slowly. She should be awake by now."

"She was very injured. Her lung was punctured. Almost all her bones were broken. It takes time for them to heal and move back into place. She'll wake up when she's ready."

"Should I have bitten her too? Would that have helped? Would it have guaranteed it?"

"William listen to me. It's guaranteed." He gave me a hug before leaving the room. Mitch walked up and stood with me quietly for a minute.

"I don't know if this makes you feel any better Willy, but I can hear her thoughts."

"You can?"

"Yeah I can. It's such a happy place in there right now. I wish you could see it."

"I wish I could too."

"She's going to wake up soon you know. She's trying to force it sooner. She can hear you crying and wants to make it better." He suddenly laughed.

"What?"

"She told me to shut the fuck up and get out of her head. It won't be long now Will. I'll go so you guys can be alone." He left and I just sat there waiting again.

[oh-theatre]

Please tell me the angst?? OwO

:DDDD IT SAD BUT :DDD

Do I trigger warning this? Imma do it

ok so it’s also like a fully fledged au but leaf me alone

Tw: Sleep paralysis, hauntings and haunted, sensitivities,, blood, scary stuff, demons

(Loosely based on the Haunting of Hill House with my own interpretation)

Ok ok so Remy and Emile are a married couple, and they work on renovating houses and selling them!

They have six kiddos! Damian is the oldest (15), then it’s Virgil (13), then Logan (9), then Patton (7), then twins Roman and Remus (5)

One day they move into this house, it’s a little out of the city, and more in the country.

It seems normal at first, the house, though old, doesn’t seem unusual. Remy and Emile set up the kids in the room. Patton and Logan room together, the twins together, Damian gets his own room and same with Virgil

The day starts okay. But slowly things become unusual. Remy and Emile find themselves having a normal night. And so do the children, for the first night, except Damian

Damian, after saying goodnight to his siblings and parents, settled into his temporary room. Snuggled up with some sewing devices as he creates some clothes. He gets a little exhausted and accidentally pricks his finger. So going to the bathroom to clean it off, he touches the light. A quick shock but nothing unusual, until he returns to his bed to find two hours have passed. Chalking it up to exhaustion Damian goes to bed. 

Everythings fine until breakfast, when he reaches for a cup and the world falls away. The noise of the morning, his siblings, everything has gone. He feels the history of the cup, from when it was made from when it was placed into the house, to dust away on a shelf, to now as it clatters from Damian’s scared hands. He wears gloves now. 

Virgil, though skeptical, feels the strange premonition just the same. Finding himself in Damian’s room scared most nights. However one night he tries his hardest to fall asleep in his own room, using his methods to calm himself. He wakes up at three am, on the dot. He watches as the room grows darker until he isn’t in bed. But sitting alone in the middle of the floor, red eyes flashing around him. He screams until his voice is hoarse, somehow ending up wrapped between his parent’s arms. 

The next night, and the night after that, the same thing continues. The figures become more and more prominent, however, taking physical shape. On the seventh night, Virgil can see each distinct figure, too scared to scream he simply pushes away but this time, the darkness moves away with him. And through the next nights, he works quietly finding he can control… the dark..and the figures?

Though both his older siblings have expressed their concerns, Logan doesn’t believe in their myths. Only finding annoyance as Patton fears what his siblings have warned him about. So for the nights he works with Patton, calming down his brother, seeing as they share a room. Once Patton is calm, they fall asleep. However, Logan awakes easily as a gentle tapping takes place outside his door. He reads for awhile before the noise grows too much for his soft ears

He places his glasses on, tiptoeing with a shaky breath to the hall, creaking the old door open. His breath seizing as a hovering figure taps across the hall, facing away from the young boy. As it seems to turn towards him he rushes to his bed, shutting his eyes closed to put up a facade. He listens only as the door opens once more. He can feel the figure move around the room, tapping as it simply floats. Moving to Patton first then towards Logan. Holding his breath, the little one tries his best to appear asleep. Once the room grows quiet, and the taps fade, he exhales. A moment too soon, no face yet his screams are heard. 

He tells not what occurred that night to anyone but Patton, his little brother trying his hardest to comfort him. Even with his own hands shaking. As he goes to hug Logan, the be-speckled boy finds himself whisked away, the dark space becoming a bright nebula. Logan floats through, his pajamas flowing with him. He scream in his loneliness until he returns to his bed, sobbing silently into his brother. Confused, and no longer intrigued but terrified. 

After the many occurrences, and the restless nights he spend trying to comfort his siblings Patton collapses exhausted in his bed. Scared of what might come, loud winds outside awake him. The heavy shattering rain, and the cracks of thunder terrify the timid boy. Alas he cannot seek safety in the arms of his parents or brother, he cant move. He remains frozen in his cold bed. His blurred vision frets around the room, until a confusing image his blue eyes set upon. Something standing over his bed, nothing looking back. He whimpers, wanting more to escape. But nothing as he simply watches. 

Finally after what seems like an eternity, he closes his fists tight screaming through the house. Rushed his parents come to home, an already alert Logan by his bed. Once the night calms once more, they assume the incident wont occur again. Yet for consecutive nights, Patton remains frozen with fear as something watches him. And he cant do anything. Though his nights are restless, his day seem normal. Seem being the unfortunate keyword, as things only grow louder and more present, an everlasting headache for the young one. 

The twins find nothing wrong, playing delightfully through the giant house, clearly full of stories. They stay side by side, enjoying their nights (the non-screamed filled ones of course) and exciting days. Even through their small concern fro their siblings, and confusion to the worries of their parents. They seem to enjoy the house and their lives nonetheless. That is until… 

The boys settle in for a late night after spending too much time creating a world through their house. The decide to rest after a final warning from their exhausted fathers. Everything appears fine, the house calm even with the storms outside. A sudden crash awaking everyone, including the young boys. They heave themselves out of bed, grabbing their stuffed animals and blankets, following the noise to the main foyer. There they meet their family, but the noise only grows louder. Quickly Remy rushes upstairs checking through the house, things continue crashing and blowing. Another loud crash and the twins and Logan scatter to Emile, finding safety in his hold. Patton offers to make some tea, his two older brothers advising they join him.  

Another crash and the kids come back, scared to venture into the house any further. Remy returns and everyone is thrown in separate directions as a chandelier comes crashing down. The twins call out, tears in their eyes, for their parents. The others gather. But when Damian looks, he cant see his siblings anywhere. The family, in a panic, calls out for them. The twins grasp to each other, desperate confusion as their families walk past them. After hours, Emile spots them where he left them. Scooping them up, overwhelming relief as hes joined by the rest of the family. Once everything is settled, and the morning breaks. They set to work cleaning the remnants of the night. And soon everything returns to normal, well as normal as can be with so many deep secrets, 

The twins continue their games however, finding their routines return easily. Hide and seek becomes harder, especially as Remus trips through the wall appearing on the other side. And Roman finds if he wills hard enough, no one can see him. 

Nothing unusual about more fun, so the twins keep their secrets. One night, as they wander through, playing their sneaky games, they listen to soft struggles of fear. Creaking into their brother Virgils room, they find him stifling scared sobs. It appears he cant see them, even as they join him on either side. Hugging him sweetly. They shut their eyes, imaging the field outside, under the cherry blossom, where they imagine playing with Virgil, hosting tea parties. Soon enough it stops, and the room feels at ease. Virgil laughs, expressing his enjoyment for their idea, yet no words spoken?

PLEASE ASK ME PLEASE PLEASE

OK OK SO I HAVE ALOT MORE FOR THIS BUT I DONT WANNA BOTHER YALL SO IF YOU WANT MORE LET ME KNOW!! AND IF I TAGGED THIS WRONG ALSO LET ME KNOW!! BUT YES THIS IS AN AU NOW

SORRY IT SUCKS

[jawnjendes]

you lost a part of your existence | shawn mendes

...in the war against yourself

chapter 9/?, university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: i hope this is as angsty as yall wanted. i read this way too many times to make sure its good n stuff. i hope it rly is. pls pls let me know what u think. blease.

masterlist | playlist

August 9

She never wanted him to stay asleep so bad in her life.

Shawn had an unexpected early start to the day. He got a call from his boss at six in the morning and had to deliver some massive flower arrangements to a wedding venue, even though he had the day off due to the birthday shenanigans that happened the night before. Still, he went and came back around noon, when Annalise was up and running. Shawn went down for a nap in the room, even more exhausted than normal.

Annalise was already on the couch, trying to enjoy her day off. She really didn’t want to catch up on the sleep she missed from helping Shawn through his nightmares all night. She knew she would have to stay awake now, knowing that he was inevitably going to fall into the dark place again. Annalise decided to catch up with Bella Santiago and her strange white background on YouTube. Naturally, remaining still on the couch for an extended period of time caused her to doze off.

Two things woke her up some time later. The first was a deep, uncomfortable pit in her stomach that really wanted to get out. She felt it in her throat, and she wiggled her toes to keep it at bay. Her mind began to race like it was second nature; What did I eat? What didn’t I eat? Did I have too much food last night or not enough? Do I have to cut pasta out of my diet now? Did I forget to eat with my birth control? Am I gonna vomit blood? Am I gonna end up in the hospital and have even more surgery? Am I gonna survive this?

The other thing was a distressed sound coming from the bedroom. Annalise tightly gripped the hem of her t-shirt, willing herself to not be sick on the couch. Every one of her senses were amped up in this state, so hearing short, little screams every few seconds only agitated her more. Why did this have to happen now?

“I’ll be just fine,” she whispered as she slowly moved to get up from the couch. “I’ll be just fine…”

Another yell came from the room, and she was not fine at all. As soon as she was on her feet, Annalise felt her stomach flip, and then she was running into the bedroom, where the closest bathroom was. Didn’t even look at Shawn’s convulsing body. Just went straight to the bathroom and slammed the door. She made it to the toilet in time, holding her hand over her still fragile incisions.

The real kicker? She heaved and retched and sobbed, but nothing came out. The horrid sensation of vomiting kept coming, but nothing was being ejected from her body. Annalise shook her head between upchucks, tears staining her cheeks. Why was this still happening?

Shawn woke up due to the loud slam, but his mind and body were still in the nightmare zone. His forehead was beaded with cold sweat, and his jaw was chattering uncontrollably. He could hear his own breathing directly in his ears, like some creepy form of ASMR. Not knowing what else to do, Shawn repeatedly smacked his cheeks like he was still trying to wake himself up. That awful retching could still be heard, his dreams were never this vivid. I’m safe. I’m alive. She’s safe. She’s alive.

Suddenly, he sat up, eyes frantically scanning the room. Who the hell is vomiting so loud? It's really fucking sunny today.

He wiped the sweat off his brow and then rubbed at his arms, wanting to jump out of his skin. He wanted this to be over already. He wanted to breathe again.

“Ann?” he called softly, his voice shaking. “Help me…”

Just as he said those words, he wanted to swallow them. Panicked as he was, Shawn was finally able to figure out that the vomiting sounds were from Ann. He scrambled out of bed and went to the bathroom door, anxiously jiggling the knob. It was locked, and it only sent another shot of fear through his chest. Not to mention, the vomiting sounds had stopped, and it was quiet for an uncomfortable amount of time.

“A-Ann?” Don’t do this, she needs you. “Ann, please…” Chill out, man.

Breathing short, Shawn slid down to his knees, leaning against the door. Tears blurred his vision as he stared at the crack at the bottom of the door. He saw a flash of blood seeping out of there from his dreams, and he punched the wall next to the doorway. He tried to find his way back to earth. He breathed the way the therapist told him to, he whispered the calming mantras, he pinched the pressure point in his hand. No matter what he did, he couldn’t shake this god awful feeling.

“Please, please…” he cried, weakly banging on the door. “Can’t breathe… Help me…”

Little did he know, Annalise was sitting on the other side of the door, knees to her chest. Now that she wasn’t distracted by her own shitty digestive tract, her mind spiraled even more. She knew she had to pull herself together long enough to help Shawn, but it never felt so impossible. How could she comfort him when she was the one who caused all this emotional turmoil? How could she break him and put him back together at the same time?

“I’m a strong lady, I’m a strong lady, I’m a strong lady,” she whispered between soft little sobs.

Why is this still happening to me? I want it to be over.

Present day.

Annalise felt an uncomfortable chill go down her spine as she recalled that afternoon. To think the following day, she proposed the idea of the separation. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Then again, she didn’t know it was going to blow up in her face like this.

She kept scrolling through Instagram as she sat on the floor in the corridor, just outside Shawn’s apartment. She looked at all the pictures and stories from his gig, and noticed how much he was glowing. When he was on stage, he was completely in his element. You wouldn’t be able to tell all the crap his girlfriend dumped on him.

It was almost midnight, and Shawn had told her he would be back by eleven thirty. This is what she gets for trusting men, she sits outside their homes looking fucking stupid. Annalise sighed and picked herself up off the floor just as she heard the staircase door open at the end of the corridor. It’s always right before she decides to leave.

Shawn was surprised to see her as he walked down the hall. He set down his guitar case when he reached the door, giving her a look. “You’re here.”

“I’ve been here for half an hour,” she told him, turning her phone over in her hand repeatedly.

“Sorry.” He pulled out his keys and unlocked the door. “Come on.”

The tension heightened tenfold as they entered the spacious apartment. Even when Shawn set his case aside to pick up Henry the cat from the kitchen counter, it never faltered. They went into the living room, where Shawn placed Henry on the giant cat condo in the corner by the screen door. That was new.

“You know I’m always honest with you,” he spoke, though he kept his back to Annalise, who had taken a seat on the couch.

“Yeah…” she trailed off, her stomach in knots. She watched him scratch Henry’s chin, wondering what the fuck was about to happen.

Shawn finally turned to her and sat on the other end of the L shaped couch. “So, you should know Alessia hit on me-”

“I know,” Annalise said coldly as she folded her arms. “I found out from her.”

Unfazed by the attitude, he continued. “No, I mean, she did it again a couple of days ago. And to be very real with you - apart from the gig I just performed - it was the highlight of my week.”

It was like being sucker punched with a frying pan. She had her mouth open like she wanted to say something, but everything she wanted to say was getting mushed up in one big angry ball.

“Now, before you freak out,” Shawn went on, “I’m telling you this so you know what exactly this separation is doing, and how bad I want it to end. I know we’re not broken up, and I will stay faithful to you, but I feel like I’m single.”

“That’s how you tell me you wanna be with me? By telling me you liked someone else’s flirting?” Annalise asked in disbelief. “So you don’t want me, you want someone.”

“I want you, Ann. And I want nothing more than to go back to the way we were.”

“You said you’re always honest.”

“I am. I don’t want to break up, but I don’t know if you feel the same way. How long more are you gonna keep this up? Everyone and their mother are fucking tired of this separation thing! I’m tired of the two week check ins, and I’m tired of wondering what you’re going to do next!”

Annalise scoffed. “You can’t still want to be with me knowing there’s other girls who want you.”

“It’s only one, Ann.”

“But you liked her advances.”

“Because the girl I love is pushing me away!” he snapped, now irritated.

She glared at him. Was that supposed to be charming? Was that supposed to reel her back in? Annalise sat up in her seat and leaned towards him. “A guy hit on me too, and you know what I did? I broke his fucking nose.”

Shawn put his hands up, confused. “You want me to break Alessia’s nose?”

“No, but I will if she-”

“Okay, okay! You’re going too far now.”

There was a pause. Annalise took a breath to cool herself down, but she still felt like she needed to yell. There was something on the tip of her tongue that she needed to talk about. She tried to remember, but the rumbling in her stomach made itself known.

Shawn noticed the sound and tilted his head. It threw him off so much he lost the angry tone. “Are… are you hungry?”

“It doesn’t matter,” she replied. “It’s after midnight, I can’t eat anyway.”

“When was the last time you ate?” he asked her.

“That’s not what we’re talking about right now.”

“You know you can’t be skipping meals.”

“Stop!” Annalise snapped, her throat suddenly tight and burning. “Don’t worry about me. Don’t scare yourself like that.”

Shawn gave her a look. Then he scooted a cushion closer. “I’m not scared.” When the silence threatened to persist, he asked, “Are you?”

Now she remembered what she wanted to talk about. She changed the subject. “You told Alessia about my health problems.”

The silence came back. Shawn looked down, trying to find the words to say. “If you heard the conversation we were having, you would understand why-”

“No,” she said firmly. “I could understand if it was just the hospital stay, but you told her everything. You told her about my anxiety with food, and you told her my calming mantra, and she threw it back in my face that night at the bar.”

“Okay, I didn’t know she would do that. If I had known, I wouldn’t have said anything at all.”

“You weren’t supposed to say anything to begin with! That wasn’t your thing to tell! I thought I could trust you, but you tell her my business and you let her stick around even though she clearly has feelings for you. How am I supposed to trust you?”

Shawn sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. He knew she had a point, but he was still frustrated. “I’m sorry I told Alessia, but she’s not a bad person. She had a lot to drink that night, I’m sure she didn’t mean it.”

Needless to say, it didn't do any good. Annalise felt herself go red in the face. “Why are you still defending her? Do you have feelings for her?”

“No!”

“So why have you been so quiet this week? You haven’t texted me at all.”

He chuckled, clearly annoyed. “Now you care about that?”

“Answer the question,” she deadpanned.

Shawn scooted a little closer and sighed. “You never answered my texts to begin with, so I stopped sending them. No use talking to a wall.”

That stung a little.

“So you do like her?” she asked.

“I told you no! How do you - Why -” Shawn cut himself off, rubbing his temples. He was really reaching his limit here.

And so was Annalise. “She hits on you, and brags about it to me. Even when I’m nice enough to give her my bed, she leaves so I don’t see her in the morning. That sounds like someone who’s hiding something!”

“Ann, she was embarrassed because she had too much to drink! Why do you always think everyone’s out to get you?” Shawn asked. Nearly there.

“She’s not out to get me, she clearly wants you! I’ve given her plenty of chances! I defended her in gaming club! I dragged her drunk ass back to campus! And then she goes and continues to flirt with you like she’s won you over! Did you even tell her to back off?”

“Of course I did!”

“You’re a liar!”

“And you’re fucking crazy!”

It was a split second of relief, allowing his pent up anger to truly seep out. But Shawn knew he said the wrong thing as soon as that second was over. He had never seen tears well up in her eyes so fast before. He wanted to take it back as soon as it came out, but Annalise was already standing up.

She decided, yeah, she is crazy. She didn’t choose it. She wasn’t always this way, but it’s how she is now. Her eyes looked down at the floor as the last words rang in her head. Heavy tears streamed down her face, but she didn’t even try to hide it.

Shawn stood up as well, much slower, watching her carefully. “Honey-”

“Don’t!” Annalise raised her voice. Her head shot up, a crazed look in her eyes. “You do not get to call me that! He doesn’t get to call me that, and she doesn’t-” She paused, her voice breaking.

“I’m sorry-” Shawn tried to say.

“That’s all I am to you, right? I’m just some crazy chick you’re seeing, huh?" Her eyes were furious, but so, so sad at the same time.

“No, of course not. It just slipped out, I-”

“If you let it slip, then you were thinking about it! You think I’m crazy too!”

“Ann, please…” Shawn reached his hand out, but she took a step back.

“I’ll break your nose too if I have to.”

"I didn't mean it!" he tried again. "I didn't… Ann, I'm so sorry!"

She shook her head as she went for the door. However, when she opened it, she was face to face with Stella and Camila. The two girls had matching smiles that quickly faded upon seeing a teary-eyed Annalise. She pushed past them and fled the vicinity before anyone could even blink.

The two girls looked back, watching Annalise go, and then they turn to Shawn, who looked quite defeated.

Shawn forgot why Stella and Camila were here, and he really didn't care anymore. He made quick strides to follow Ann, but the girls blocked the doorway.

"What did you do?" Stella harshly asked. "Why was Ann crying?"

"Stay calm," Camila said, rubbing her shoulder. "Seriously though, what happened?"

Shawn was still staring out the door, hoping Ann would come back. Forget how pissed off he was this last week, he needed to make this right. He never intended to make her cry and run away. "I don't have time to explain-"

"If you made her cry," Stella said, "she's not gonna fucking talk to you. So you better tell us what you fucking did."

"We're here to help," Camila reassured.

Shawn ran his fingers through his hair, pacing back towards the living room, and the girls followed. Henry jumped down from the condo and walked between his legs, leaving little tufts of orange fur on his jeans.

"Oh my god, he does have a cat," Stella mumbled. Then she spoke directly to Shawn. "You got about five minutes before my allergies start acting up."

"And another five before Brian and Connor get here with the masses," Camila added. "So you better get talking."

They all took a seat on the couch. Too many things have happened in this room. Shawn took a deep breath.

"It's like she wants me to be cheating on her," he said. "She'll pull something out of thin air and use it to prove something that's not even happening!"

Camila tilted her head. "That's… that's just crazy."

"She was irrational?" Stella asked. Her harsh and defensive demeanor seemed to change.

"That's the word I should have used," Shawn glumly replied. "I told her she was crazy, and that's when she left."

"Well, I'm sure she said things she didn't mean, too. Just let her simmer down," Camila told him.

Stella was frowning, still in thought. Surely the wife/roommate had to have some insight on this fuckery.

"Anything you wanna add?" Shawn asked her. "Because I really don't know what to do now. I've never seen her so angry before, I didn't think she could be set off like that."

"Okay so," she began, sitting on the edge of her seat, "I know I don't talk about her business, because she doesn't want me to-"

"So it's not just me!" Shawn interrupted. "Why does she do that, it's so frustrating! I want people to know who my girlfriend is but she makes it so hard!"

Stella raised an eyebrow. "She makes it hard because people are really goddamn nosy. The way she dresses alone causes strangers to ask really invasive questions, not to mention she is - or was - is... linked to the most popular guy on campus and that's given her attention she never wanted. Imagine if they knew she was on Prozac, which brings me to the theory I was going to make before I was interrupted."

"Sorry," Shawn mumbled.

"Like I was saying, it's her business, but her mental health is important. I could be wrong, but she might be off her meds."

The other two only stared. Could this really be the only explanation?

"How do you know?" Camila asked.

"I don't. But I always hear her pill bottle rattling in the morning," Stella explained. "And now that I think about it, I don't remember the last time I heard it."

"Is there a way you can find out?" Shawn asked. "Can you ask her?"

Stella chuckled in disbelief. "You really think she would answer honestly?"

"What about searching her room?" Camila suggested. "Like, when she's not there."

"Ooh, please?" Shawn put his hands together, looking at Stella. "I need to know if that's why she's so pissed at me!"

She gave him a look. "Dude, she's genuinely angry at you. I mean, you called her crazy. Why the hell would you do that? Besides, it's not that I'm worried about."

Shawn was about to ask to elaborate, but there was a knock on the door followed by several voices out in the corridor.

"I'll make it fast," Stella said. "You two should be close because of the hospital thing, but instead she's pushing you away. She's not excited for Halloween, I'm gonna have to force her into a costume. She skipped game club, and I haven't seen her do any school work lately. And I'm willing to be she's not doing so well at work either.  The last time she was like this, she was going through that break up with that asshole Luca, and I know you're nothing like that guy."

______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @poppyshawn @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @yourdeflightfullyleft @shawmndes @calyumthomas @havethetimeeofyourlifee @wronglanemendes @chillingbythesea @softmendesss @someoneunimportantxx

[fal-carrington]

On my own [4/??]

Pairing: KamilahxMc

Disclaimer: characters are not mine

Prompt: Love can happen on unexpected occasions, people fall in love when they least expect, bringing feelings that they thought they had buried long ago within themselves. Falling in love with mortals was off Kamilah's to-do list until a certain stubborn mortal emerges and changes the CEO's heart. When Kamilah finally admits being in love, an unexpected event happens, but can love survive death?

A/N: Wow it’s been awhile, so sorry for this.

Tag list: @kamilahs-bitch @gavryllo @carolcunha7 @zoe6111 @aestheticsayeed @give-me-ernest-sinclaire @tephy24 @scarlet-letter-a0114 @foszil @ilovekamilahsayeed @yall-play-it-cool @alekai-sayeed

Hayley blinked a few times, her vision still blurred, her mouth dry and her head spinning. She had her back against the iron railings, she hardly knew when she'd last had a drink or a shower. Her stomach rumbled with hunger, but she was too sick to even eat that piece of bread that was on a porridge dish in the corner of the cell.

It was a few times she was conscious, most of the time she had no idea what was going on, but one thing she knew, she was in a hostile environment and was constantly being drugged by Jameson. He came in the night, she only knew the time for the little window, it was the only thing she knew, when it was day or night, Jameson drugged her, in the few seconds she stayed awake she heard voices, the voice of Jameson and another that she recognized by her visions. Gaius.

What they planned to do with her was still unknown. She did not know why they still kept her alive, or what they wanted with her. Why capture it? She was not a threat, she was just a human, just Adrian's assistant. Her mind was a mess, her memories blurred, but there was something she still remembered, in flashes of memories Kamilah's vision still lingered in her mind, and the last time she had seen her in that elevator.

"Kamilah..." Those were the only words that escaped her mouth. She tried to stay sane, lucid, but her mind was a whirlwind at that moment.

"Oh great. You're awake.” She heard Jameson's familiar voice. Jameson's blurred vision became clearer as he approached her on the other side of the cell. "How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Fuck you," Hayley snapped. Jameson laughed.

"You should review your manners." He shook his head. "I brought your food... Why, you did not eat anything." Jameson stared at the porridge dish thrown in the corner of the cell.

"You talk about the garbage you give me to eat? I'd rather eat shit.” Hayley rolled her eyes.

"You know, if you were a little more educated, I would make it easier for you." Jameson said as he administered his syringe with the contents that Hayley knew it was the drug again.

"What do you get out of it Jameson? I do not see what benefit you get from all this. The satisfaction of fucking someone else's life? "

"Oh, Hayley—"

"You've been drugging me for months, and I still do not understand your purpose. All you do is killing me a little more every day."

"It's been a year now. I never meant to hurt you, things would have been easier if you had not gotten involved in this world. You had a chance to get out of it all that night, but you wanted to know more, you wanted to venture further into it, it's all your curiosity, and look what brought you back?”

"I do not regret anything." She did not regret meeting Kamilah, did not want to forget her. She loved her.

"It involves so much more than that. You see, the master has a plan that's much bigger than all of us," he said.

"Gaius? I didn’t anything to him, I have nothing to do with this brawl he has against the council, against Adrian and... Kamilah.” Her name hurt only the mention of him.

"Oh, you do." That dark voice echoed through the walls of that dark place. The hairs on Hayley's arm twitched, she could feel his evil presence in that place.

"Son of a bitch, now that you've decided to show up?" Hayley raised her voice, even though inside she was panicking, she could not show fear, that's what he wanted.

"Hard words, coming from the mouth of a human, if I were you, I would take care of the words, you are not in a position to make threats." Gaius stepped out of the shadows and appeared in the light.

"Master." Jameson bowed. Hayley could see him for the first time. His pale, gray skin, white eyes with dilated pupils, looked like a dry corpse, no more hair around the skull, only a few strands of hair around.

"Jesus, time was a bitch to you," Hayley said with a mocking grin. Gaius frowned.

"Let's see how long you keep your sense of humor."

"You're already killing me, I do not know what you expect from me anymore." She shrugged.

"I've been experimenting things in you for months, and you've proven resilient, maybe it's by willpower to get out of here and see someone familiar... maybe someone you love. Maybe Kamilah or Adrian?"

“I—That’s not... How do you—?”

“I know everything. They’re both in love with you. Killing you? Do you think this is what I'm doing to you?" He touched the bars of the cell as he paced.

"There is no other explanation. You're drugging me."

"Even with two eyes you can only see half the picture," he said as he walked.

"What you want from me?"

"From you? What grace would it be if I revealed what I wanted from you? But on the other hand, you serve as a means to hurt who I want."

"The council beat you once. They can do it again.” Hayley said firmly. Gaius gave a dark laugh in response that made her shut up.

"The council? Those mere puppets that I created ?” He spoke with hate. "I thought they had some value, some sense of honor, they were my subjects, they should bow down to me, but they decided to revolt against their king, they are mere ants compared to my power."

"See this is your mistake. You who are old as shit should already know that the monarchical absolutist system does not work very well, all kings end up falling.”

“I’m not going to fall this time, girl.”

"Kamilah will defeat you. She's strong and powerful, she did it last time.” Hayley really believed she was strong enough.

"My queen..." Gaius's voice became anguished through hatred. "She betrayed me for Adrian. She turned her back on me and stabbed me from behind, she deserves my revenge as much as they do, except with her... I'll do something even worse."

"If you touch her—" Hayley screamed with all her might, but he laughed.

"What are you going to do?! You're under my power as much as they are.” He smiled. "See, this is your weakness, falling in love with a vampire is not a death sentence. The story is only tragedy if the vampire loves you back and you managed to get her to love you. I will destroy her heart, as I have done all these centuries, but this time it will be much worse."

“You should’ve killed me already.” Hayley said. “She already thinks that I’m dead.”

“For now. Yes.”

"She does not deserve this. Please do not hurt her. I'll do whatever you want.” Tears escaped Hayley's eyes.

"But you're going to do anything I want, why do you think you’re still alive?" Jameson opened the cell door and Gaius slowly stepped into that little space, for a moment there were only two of them in that place. "Kamilah broke my heart, she was the only one I hoped did not betrayed me. I gave the world to her, I turned her into a goddess and how she repaid me? Stabbing me just like the others."

"You arrested her in a toxic relationship for centuries, hurt her, turned her on without her consent and made her afraid of her life. Can not you see? It was never love, she never loved you, she just thought so."

"You really think she's good, do not you? Do you really believe she has found redemption? Oh, child, Kamilah did the same bad things I did, she's just as bad as I am. Oh, Hayley. You're too young to understand. But soon you will, I will not hurt Kamilah directly, not now, you will do it for me."

"I never—"

"... And you will do it without even knowing what you are doing." He smiled grimly. "You're going to break her heart and destroy it for me." He moved toward her, Hayley tried to escape to the other corner of the cell, but it was useless, before she could, Jameson grabbed her and she felt the prick of the needle on her skin, in a matter of seconds she was erasing again, she felt Gaius's cold hands grip her chin, causing her to stare at him in those mere conscious seconds. "...Forget that you ever worked for Adrian Raines, forget that someday you knew the secrets of the supernatural and the world of vampires, forget that you once loved Kamilah Sayeed."

"She's a good person, please, please do not do this, she's come a long way by now, if you do, she'll—“ Hayley's heart stopped beating with the mention of the last words and with a maddening rapidity, all the words, all the kisses, the declarations, every night went out. Suddenly the name who made her stomach turn and her body shiver, the name of the person she admired and loved meant nothing.

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU

Part 1, Start from the way beginning here!

Chapter 30.5: I’m Not Playing These Games!

There I stood in front of the person that made me flee to protect my family, the gang leader himself, Johnny. Two years since the incident and he shows up at my most vulnerable.

“How the hell did you get here anyways.”

“My right hand man here pulled what you would call a ‘pro gamer’ move and transported us here” he gives me a look “this would’ve been you but you just had to be good at heart and play hero” they roll closer to me “now everyone and their abuela are rising up and becoming the very thing that has failed them, heroes never gave a shit about us!” his voice steadily raising “I’ve killed them all and look what it has brought, no heroes and local law running in fear but I’m not the bad guy. If anyone wanted to join, they get the freedom to use their quirk in public, I’m empowering them!”

“That’s not empowerment!” I bark back “that’s terrorism! The people join out of fear and you use them like pawns to take over!”

“Terrorism, liberation, same thing!” he rolled his eyes “point is, I’m here to kill you once and for all!” he stopped 5 feet away from me “I don’t let anyone live to tell the tale of fighting me!”

“What will killing me do for you now?” I tried to find the logic in his plan “I’m already not returning home and everyone thinks I’m dead.”

“Ah I though so too until Humberto couldn’t shut his mouth about you being alive because he could see some ‘red string’ bullshit” he scoffed “his cousin pried information from him and I just had to see for myself, he had visions of you roaming around these streets and going to some sort of hero training school.”

“Fuck, he would develop his quirk better when I died” I muttered to myself. I had to think fast, since I’m not at 100 percent because technically my body is still healing itself AND I only had one gun on me with 10 bullets. “I’ve defeated you once, and I’ll do it again!”

“Oh? Where you planning to throw fists in this GUN fight?!” he pulls out a very weathered and old rifle, like it was cool “I brought the HEAT tonight!”

Out of habit, I pulled out my gun but burst laughing when I saw what he had “That?- pbbt! Boi brought the rifle Winston Churchill used in the war!” I cackled and made the other person crack up too. I start to tear up “Yo! How much did that cost you? 5 bags of wheat and a chicken?!” I laughed harder and the other person was rolling on the floor laughing out of control.

“Sorry boss but I warned you” said the lackey, trying to stop laughing “she was gonna roast you ass all because you took the gun from that veteran’s display at Century High.”

“Fuck you guys!” he cocked the gun “I’ll just end yall laughing!” 

At that moment, I lunged forward and knocked the gun out of his hands and threw in an elbow to buy me time to escape. I ran toward the warehouse area, hoping to hide and teleport out to familiar area. The area was void of anybody and my plan to teleport out was a bust because my body can’t handle a 100 meter teleportation, let alone a 2 mile one! Plan B, send an SOS ping to Mimi while hiding. I hid behind a tall stack of pallets, the sound of the other two coming closer and closer to the warehouse.

“19 to 20, can you hear me?”

“Loud and clear, what is going on?”

“Code Moonbeam, I need backup and escape.”

“-gasp- Who’s the perp?”

“It’s the gang leader that caused me to leave home, he found me.” The sound of a loud bang of metal on metal was heard, startling me. “Just please send me anyone that’s near downtown! I’m in a warehouse with the number 64 painted on it.”

“We’re on it! Hang tight!”

I’m absolutely terrified, who knows how long help will arrive or if I’ll make it out alive. This isn’t a training game, I have a high chance of not surviving this one.

“COME OUT, COME OUT ITATI!” yelled Johnny with a gun cock “I know you’re here! just give up and accept your fate.” He breathes heavily “I’ll make sure to put you in that empty casket!”

I stifle my sob, I was basically a sitting duck, waiting to get plucked. Two minutes of keeping silent, I hear a very distinct ‘SMASH!’ battle cry followed by the sound of a brick wall breaking. I peer over the pallets and see Midoriya, Bakugo, Iida, Todoroki, Uraraka and Kirishima. I ping Mimi again.

“Hey um 20, quick question, WHAT THE FUCK?!”

“IT WAS THE BEST I COULD DO! Everyone else was indispatch-able in a reasonable amount of time.”

“Okay, so who else is on the way?”

“Your caseworker, Hemingway, Midnight and myself with Jin.”

“HURRY PLEASE before the twinks become my liability!”

I look on to the madness going on the other side of my hiding spot, these crackheads are really wailing on Johnny and his right hand man. It wasn’t safe for me to come out and I had to think of something quick. Uraraka and Todoroki found me and almost gave away my location.

“Palma-san! Thank goodness you’re alright” sighed Uraraka in relief “who is that person in the wheelchair? and why are those two a threat?”

“No time to explain” I squeeze my eyes shut “I’m trying to think of a plan that won’t risk my body to further damage” I bring my hands to my face “I can’t teleport nor levitate very strongly and I only have 8 bullets now.”

“I saw that he has fire” Todoroki put his hand on my knee “if you copy my fire quirk, will that help your thought process?”

“Shoto, you’ve been granted the brain cell tonight!” my face lit up “I can still copy! This will work perfectly!” I clap my hands to refocus my thoughts “Shoto, on my cue, I want you to form an ice dome to trap in those two. Uraraka, on my cue, drop that stack of pallets on them. I’ll distract them long enough to get things in motion.” I stand up “In the meantime, Shoto, I’m counting on you to let everyone know to back off because I came up with a plan.”

“Right!” both affirmed with me before getting to their part of the plan. I copy Todoroki’s quirk and ran out to the action.

“ENOUGH FOOLING AROUND JOHNNY!” I bellowed to stop everything “this a fight between you and me! Square up if you’re so tough!” I strike a power stance to show my seriousness.

“Need I remind you that you’re the reason I can’t fight at my best anymore” he drops his rifle “you disabled my ability to use telekinesis along with my ability to walk” he summoned fire on the palms of his hands “you’re the real villain here! Fuck you and your heroics! People like you deserve death!”

“NO! It’s you that’s the villain” I take slow steps forward “I came here to hide from the terror you’ve caused in our quiet piece of town! No more will I hide, we settle this once and for all!” I unzip my bomber jacket and go into a fighting stance, everyone backed off the moment I got in my stance.

“Fine by me!” Johnny clenched his fists “first to die, loses.”

“BET!” I scream as I do the Rising Phoenix, flames cover my body and burn off my non-flame resistant items, luckily my outfit was flame resistant. I fight them the best I could to get them all in one spot for the plan to work but I was getting tired fast. My body was trembling for me to stop using the fire quirk by the time I get them where I wanted “URARAKA!” I screamed and the pallets fell on top of the two. “SHOTO NOW!” a blast of ice came in on the left and quickly engulfed them in a thick ice dome. I released my fire copy and gasped for air.

“Are they dead?!” worriedly peeped Midoriya.

“Not yet” I smirked “I’m gonna contact the police and caseworker, they’ll-” and before I could put my finger to the earpiece, I heard the ice cracking “TAKE COVER!” It was too late for me, since I was the closest, I got hit with shards of ice and got knocked down onto my back. I sat up quickly and saw that the two weren’t there but I knew exactly what happened. “The other person’s quirk was Wormhole!” I facepalmed myself “of course it was! That’s how they got here without a plane, they wormholed to coordinates.” I felt myself go weaker and weaker “Is everyone...okay?”

“Don’t move!” Bakugo cried out “you’re bleeding, somebody help me stop the bleeding!”

I look at my body and I saw a piece of ice the size and thickness of a portfolio file, pierced into my upper navel. I touch my wound and saw the blood on my hand “Huh? So I am” the sound of everyone panicking around me was fading, my vision blurring “just leave me here to die, it’s okay” I said smiling, accepting my fate “I lost, tell my family I love them, I’m coming home Jesus.” I slowly close my eyes because finally my agony of being in hiding and not being happy were coming to an end. I felt my body go into a comfortable numb feeling along with feeling light as air. A blinding white light came into view, ‘ah yes, the heavenly gates’ I thought to myself as I felt myself get closer to it. I regained my vision and I was met with a familiar setting of an IV drip, heart rate monitor, brain wave monitor and a TV in the top-right corner of the room.

“DAMMIT! I DIDN’T DIE!” I yell and winced in pain.

“She woke up, doctor” a nurse gasped.

“Bring in the legal guardian” said the doctor, then turned to me “Hello Miss Palma, that was quite the scare you gave your friends” he scribbled on a clipboard “can you recall how you got here?”

“I remember getting the ice in my navel and realizing I was bleeding” I take a look at my surroundings “then I closed my eyes because I thought I was going to finally die, then I felt numb then I saw the light” I looked at the doctor “now I’m here and awake, not dead.”

“Well that’s all thanks to your hero friends” he tucks his pen in his ear “they rushed in with your extremely fatigued body and the bleeding was stopped before you reached critical levels. We expected you to wake up in the late afternoon but it looks like you’re recovering fast.”

“Wait, what time is it?”

“It’s 11pm, you arrived here right before 10pm” he answered me and got up “I’ll leave you to the legal work with your guardian, expect me again in 2 hours.”

My caseworker walked in, tear stained and clutching her flies “Oh sweetheart!” she threw herself over my left side “how could I be so careless to just-”

“It’s not your fault” I interrupted her “nobody could’ve predicted this, I was being erratic and ran off by myself!” I told her everything that happened “Will I be okay?” I asked softy, stopping her scribbling “it’s just that, more and more things are popping up and I’m worried that I won’t be strong enough to last this final year of high school” I try not to cry “I don’t want to be relocated again or get sent home, my heart can’t take another one.”

“Sweetie, don’t cry” she put her files down to hold my hand “you won’t get sent away until the threat is gone. And you don’t have to worry about getting any of your tuition money getting taken away nor the labyrinth exam.”

“Wait what do you mean?” I was taken back by those words.

“The proctor properly documented what went wrong and everyone checked the exam requirements” her smile broke through like sunshine through gray clouds “since you got interrupted by a non-exam projectile by a non-staff, it falls under unfair termination, so you are set to take the real test in the last month of your 3rd year.”

“I got pardoned?!” I got excited but winced in pain “that’s great news! I guess I have time to heal until then huh?”

Midnight walked in with a phone in her hand “Oh it’s true, you are awake” she sighed in relief “We called your parents and your mom had a lot to say, very loudly.”

“Not surprised” I giggle “is she on the line? Put her on speaker.” Midnight put the phone on speaker and put it on my shoulder “hello? Madre?”

“Mija! Que en la Jesus estas haciendo” she exasperated “cada ves me hablan, voy en para cardiaco!”

“Sorry mom” I sighed “pero estoy en el hospital y no soy muerta, but what should I do? I took a lot of damage.”

“Ya saves que nessistas hacer mija” my mother took on a serious tone “ya se que no lo gustas pero dilen nessistas estasis.”

“Estasis? What is that?” muttered Midnight “I don’t think I like the sound of that.”

“I don’t like it either” I groaned “Estasis, or Stasis in english, is a quirk medical procedure were they put you in a mild coma so your body can heal from the inside out BUT this is only done on patients with telekinesis after surgeries, sever injuries and child-birth. Since telekinesis is very hard to suppress, it makes healing very difficult and posing danger to our already damaged bodies.”

“Is that why you didn’t want to go to the hospital after the practice exam?” Midnight sat by my right side, getting at face level with me “you feared of getting into stasis?” I nodded and she gave me a very understanding face “oh Ita, you’re our little trooper but now you really need it” she turned to speak into the phone “okay Mrs Palma, what needs to be done?”

As my mother explains how it’s done, everyone else is in the hallway in anxiety of my well-being.

“Do you think she’s going to be alright?” Kirishima worriedly asked Bakugo and Uraraka “that doctor didn’t seem too worried but that lady and Midnight were in shambles rushing in.”

“I’m worried about Iida-kun” Uraraka softly spoke, turning to were Iida was sitting “he hasn’t said a thing since they took her in. And he hasn’t changed out of his bloodied suit, poor thing, having to carry her limp body and screaming for her to wake up.”

“Probably thinking about their fight before the incident” Kirishima sighed “he thinks this is all his fault.”

“Well, isn’t it?” Bakugo butted in “if he didn’t interfere in her practice exam, wouldn’t she not be here?”

The two thought about Bakugo’s point and how it was true technically but then a portal appeared. Mimi and Jin rushed out of the portal.

Mimi scanned the room and locked sights onto Iida “YOU!” she screamed and ran over to where he was sitting and grabbed him from his suit collar “You told me that you’d insure her safety! Now I’m gonna lose her all because of your insolence!” when he didn’t give a response, Mimi slapped him so hard it made everyone’s head turn.

“Mimi thats enough!” Jin pleaded “let go of him, we don’t know who’s fault it is yet” he put his hands on her wrists “please babygirl.” She let go of Iida and Jin holds on to her arm “lets go in and check on her, she’ll be happy to see us.”

“Yes, lets” Mimi calmed down and walked into the hospital room with Jin.

-Few hours later-

“Okay Miss Palma” the doctor said as he attached a syringe to the IV drip “I got the dosage attached and it’s a slow drip” he puts his thumb on the plunger of the syringe “why don’t you sing for us” he gestures to everyone in the room “you’ve got quite the audience here.”

“Sure, any requests?” I get ready for the incoming comatose state.

“What’s that french song you sang when you were sweeping the other day?” recalled Uraraka “it’s very pretty.”

“OH I know which one you’re talking about” I clear my throat “okay, ready” the doctor started the drip before I starting singing “Hold me close and hold me fast...” I saw everyone smile and enjoy my singing, slowly feeling the medicine take effect “...and when you speak, angels sing from above...” I could barely feel the warmth of Mimi and Jin’s hands holding mine “...and life will always be, le vie en rose~” my eyes fluttered shut and the rest of my body went limp.

I was expected to wake up in 10 days, in those days, I’m as delicate as a newborn baby. Mimi and Jin take care of me by regulating my body temperature, bathing, feeding me liquids and making sure I don’t get bed sores. It wasn’t difficult but it got lonely as everyone but them got to go home for the holidays. On the ninth day, something came up were they were needed immediately. With Midnight unavailable to care for her, they turned to the help of the hero dorms. They teleported in with Ita swaddled in a sleeping bag.

“Listen up wannabes” Jin demanded everyone’s attention “we need your help for one day, see, we got summoned and can’t leave her alone” he gestures to Mimi “so we’re depending on you to care for her until we return.”

“I have instructions and schedule of feedings and other stuff” she slings off a duffle bag “here’s everything and the food.”

“We’ll take care of things!” Iida stands up to get the bag “you have my word.”

“Good!” she hands over the bag “if you fuck it up, I’ll end you.”

“Mimi, cool it!” Jin scolded “but seriously, if we come back and she’s in worse condition, I’ll make sure you won’t be able to reproduce!”

Mimi hands over Ita, then jumps in the portal. 

“Well, I’m confident that we’ll-” he turns and sees that everyone that was in commons area, fled to their rooms “I’ll take care of her” he sighed and took her to his room. He gently set her down on his bed and he sat on the floor to look through the bag. “Let’s see, theres the list and soup” he took out some books and a mini speaker “wonder what these are? Guess I should read the list” everything was neat and organized to Iida’s liking but the contents were a bit strange “let’s see, it’s 11am right now, so she had breakfast already. Next is... read to her?” he was puzzled on the scheduled item “well I can’t ignore it, I shall read to her” he picked up the book with a book mark sticking out of it “this one will do, The Secret Garden, chapter six” he cleared his throat “Next morning, Mary told Martha that she had found Colin...” he gets invested in the book and read it all the way to the end “...And by his side with his head up in the air and his eyes full of laughter walked as strongly and steadily as any boy in Yorkshire—Master Colin! The End.” He looked at the time, it was nearly 3pm! “Oh my- reading this book took so much time! What’s next on the list?” he looked and saw that he missed taking her temperature. He took note of the thermometer after the beep “Okay you’re at 89 degrees, nearing over-heating” he unzips the sleeping bag to see her in comfort wear and thermal socks, her squirming scared him but it was just a reflex. He carries her out to the commons room to set her on the couch as he heated up her soup.

“I’m sorry I’ve been such a jerk to you” Bakugo whispered as he sat down near her “but please come back stronger than ever, we need you.”

Tokoyami slid in the moment Bakugo got up to go back to his room “Ita, I miss you dearly” he nuzzled his beak against her forehead “when you wake up, I’ll help you back to your feet, I promise.”

“What are you doing?” Iida asked confused at the sight of Tokoyami nuzzling Ita’s forehead.

“She likes it when I do this” he responded without thinking “but usually were cuddling and kiss-” he stopped his sentence but it was too late, Iida put 2 and 2 together.

“You’re the mysterious boy she’s been sneaking off to make out with?!”

“Well, to be fair to her” Tokoyami laughed nervously “she hasn’t came over for a session for months” he stood up “I think she’s seeing somebody else or maybe is cooling off to start something with someone else?” he gulped “but we were never in a relationship and what we had was just purely physical, she’s a needy girl Iida-kun. If you kissed her, she’ll pounce on you for more.”

Things got very awkward after that, Tokoyami in general avoided Iida for the rest of the day. After Ita’s afternoon feeding came washing her face and letting her on the floor to listen to music. Iida laid on the floor next to her.

“Remember when we’d sit around and talk for hours” he reminisced “and how I’d hold you close, so many times I’d held back kissing you” everything was very still yet the music and company made his room less solemn “I just love you Ita. You’re amazing and I don’t know why you spend time with me when I ruin everything and cause you stress” he reached out to stroke her hair “I’m sorry for making you so angry that day, sometimes I don’t know how to approach things and I just end up ruining things. I have so many things to say to you” he turns his head to face her “I want to tell you how I feel, the dreams I have of you, all the wonderful feelings you give me when you run up with your arms out for a hug, the thoughts I have when I hold your hand” he sighs “but my mind blanks when I want to tell you, not for long though. When you wake up, and the day presents itself, I’ll ask you to be my girlfriend” a warm smile creeps on his face “I’ll give you flowers and set up everything perfectly so you’ll never forget it, we’ll kiss and be filled with our love...won’t that be nice?” he waited for a response like she was conscious “you’re my darling Ita, I love you” he kissed her nose.

Next on the list was to bend her joints and to rub the tension out of her back, it brought back memories from the time she came back from her first practice exam. Iida was feeling the regret of not telling her that day before her couch pass out. That didn’t matter right now, the day will come for his turn. He served her dinner and cleaned her up for bed. Mimi thought ahead and packed an air mattress so she didn’t have to bunk with anybody.

“Iida-kun, are you sure that air mattress is going to fit on your floor?” Midoriya asked in the open doorway of Iida’s room “it’s running up really big and it’s not at half-way inflated.”

“Not to worry” Iida tried to talk over the sound of the air pump “I’ll find a solution to fit this in, as long as she has a soft place to rest.” Ita was lying on his bed on her side, already looking like she fell asleep waiting for Iida to inflate the air bed. Finally, after rearranging half the room, the bed was ready for her. He puts her in the sleeping bag and places her on the air bed with 5 pillows laid about. He closes his door and crawls into his own bed “Good night Ita” he turned to her side of the room as he puts his hand on the light switch of his table lamp “sweet dreams, I love you.”

Dreams of her waking up and being back to her sweet, loving self came to Iida that night. When morning came, it was back to the harsh reality that she isn’t back yet. Still, he was full of duty to take care of her until Mimi and Jin came back later that day.

“Iida-kun, are her eyes supposed to do that?” Uraraka asked as she was looking after her on the couch as Iida was heating up her soup “it’s like she’s trying to open her eyes but can’t.”

“Oh that, yes it is” he responded from the kitchen “it’s more concerning if she doesn’t, it means that her brain is actively functioning at a normal rate.” the sounds of plates being shuffled were heard “I learned that from the papers her friends left for me, apparently when telekinesis users sleep, their brain activity spikes at random and their eyes do the same thing but at a much faster rate.”

“That makes sense on why she can stay up for days at a time” Todoroki said as he leaned in closer to her face “I wonder if she can hear us?”

“Give her some space Shoto” Midoriya warned “what if she wakes up seeing your face up in hers?” he turned to Iida walking in with the soup “can we watch you feed her?”

“Sure but it’s a bit of a strange sight to see her eat” he sat next to her and brought a cooled spoonful of soup to her lips, she does some quick sniffs and opens her mouth slightly to consume the spoonful “it’s an automatic response to swallow liquids so her food consists of soups with smooth textures.”

They keep watching her eat and see some of the after care until Mimi and Jin showed up.

“Alright, looks like she was well taken cared of” Mimi announced as she was inspecting her “thank you so much for caring for her.”

“Not a problem” Iida said bowing “we hope she recovers soon.”

Another 2 days pass, it’s New Years and she hasn’t woken up. Concern and slight panic set in Mimi and Jin as they really don’t know what to do. They call her mother and she said to wait it out a little longer as her brain might be adjusting back slower to full power. Everyone comes back to the dorms the next day and are worried for her, a knock at the door of their dorms kicked everything into high alert.

“Oh Shinso, nice to see you” Jin said relieved as he opened the door “we thought it was somebody else.”

“I came as fast as I could” Shinso panted “is she awake?”

Jin lets him in and walked to her room “That’s our concern” he opened the door to see Mimi taking her temperature “she was predicted to wake up 2 days ago but there’s no signs of her waking up soon.”

“It’s been emotionally taxing these last few weeks” Mimi sighed as she stroked her hair “I really want my baby girl back.”

“Can I have a moment alone with her?” Shinso asked and without hesitation, they got up and let him have his moment. He sighed the moment they closed the door “Oh Ita, I wish I was here to prevent this mess” he held her hand carefully “I have so many stories to tell and things to give you” he looks out of the window, it was dark with light snowfall out “I smoked that blunt you gave me, it was really good and I slept like a log that night” he chuckled “I dreamt about you that night and I couldn’t wait to come back to kiss you and play with you” he leaned in and kissed her lips “it’s not the same, wake up so I can get a proper kiss.”

Like it was on cue, she opened her eyes and groaned. She blinked and looked around her, not really processing what’s going on. “Wha- what day is it?” she stretched her body and her spine realigned “Hey Hitoshi! How was-”

“I can’t believe it!” he gasped “you woke up!” he ran to open the door “SHE WOKE UP!”

“Hmm? What’s the big deal with me being awake?” I asked as everyone piled in to see me.

“You took longer than 10 days to wake up!” Jin cried out, throwing himself onto her for a hug “but you’re back and nothing else matters!”

“Oh fuck really?” I hugged back “I must of been really injured if I took longer to heal.” Jin released his embrace “actually, if you say that, I don’t know if I’m at 100 percent then.”

“What do you mean?” asked Hansai “you took extra time, doesn’t that mean you can get back to things like normal?”

“Not exactly” I responded “I’m going to be weak and vulnerable but now I can sort of do things on my own, WHICH REMINDS ME!” I gesture for everyone to make room for me as I pull the covers off me to get up “it’s time to-” I felt my legs give out like they didn’t even try to support me and I fell.

“Oh shit you alright?” Yuka panicked as she helped me up.

“FUCK ME! I can’t walk” I stressfully screamed “I hate this side effect.”

After some quick planning on my next course of moves, everyone left my room again to leave me and Shinso alone.

“It’s getting really close to your curfew” I checked the clock, it was 7:50pm “you should go before everyone gets worried.”

“I’ll come by tomorrow to tell you about my time away” he leans in to kiss her, she kissed back “until then, stay warm love.”

Those words lingered with me all night, the thought of Shinso being the one I woke up to was making my heart pound. I was motivated to get better now, the sooner I can get back to full health, the sooner Shinso and I can be in an intimate relationship! Even though I had a week and a half until school resumed, I was still too stumbly to do any physical training or walking long distances in that matter. First day back and I was wheelchair bound but this time I had so many people helping me around. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel lonely or pathetic. I had so many holes in my schedule that I could leave 2 hours early if I wanted to. But I planned to fill them with training sessions and helping lower-classmen once I was able to. Soon I was able to walk and run like normal, I felt myself get stronger with my quirk too. Word got out that Iida helped me recover and was the one that carried me to the hospital that night. I gather the courage to say thank you to him after class, since lunch is right after the class we’re in.

“Hey Tenya!” I get in his way to get his attention “can I talk to you for a sec?”

“Sure!” he didn’t hesitate at my request.

I pull him to the far corner of the hall “I just wanted to say, thank you for helping me during my recovery time” I take a deep breath “and, sorry for being angry and shouty before I ran off.”

“Don’t apologize for that” he fixed his glasses “I’m sorry for pushing you too far to make you angry.”

“Well, I was wondering if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you?” I get timid “like, anything at all?”

“No need” he smiled “seeing you healthy and safe is reward enough” he put a hand on my shoulder “I’m just happy you’re back.”

“Okay, if you say so” I give him a tight hug “I’ll pay you back! somehow.” We part ways for lunch but I was in a dilemma, how could I see Iida with intentions of sparking something when things were going well on their way with Shinso?! Was I in denial that Iida doesn’t have feelings for me or that I don’t really want to be in a relationship with Shinso because of some underlying issue? I don’t know, it’s all very confusing that I’m teetering between them two when it’s super obvious who I want to be with. I meet up with Shinso at the roof of the hero dorms for a smoke sesh later that night.

“Hey remember when we danced up here?” Shinso said, laying next to me on the blanket.

“How could I forget?” I smiled, recalling that night “I was so sore from training but I forgot about my pain because you did that.”

“Remember what I said?” he cleared his throat “after the kiss?”

“Yeah~” I start blushing and turned my head away to hide my face.

“I’m holding myself against my word tonight” he gets closer and leans on his side “it’s the right time and I’ve been longing to ask” I turned my head to face him and he holds my hand “will you be my girlfriend?”

My heart felt like it stopped, this is it, your chance at happily ever after. I felt my face glow red and my lips trembling “Yes, I’d love to be your girlfriend.” As he leaned in to kiss me, as if to lock in my answer, my anxiety of if I chose the right answer was lifted off me. That or the high was kicking in, but I was happy that better days were coming...maybe senior year won’t be so bad.

-Chapter 30 End-

<Previous - Next>

FAQ * Chapter 1 * Intro Post         

[writingkeepsmewhole]

I’m Staying

This is part 9 of Bartender. It’s the finely part yall and I can’t wait for you to read it. I hope you are happy with the ending. Please let me know what ya thank :) Reader wakes up in the bunker. Now knowing the truth she has a big has a choice to make.

Dean Winchester x Reader

Warnings: None?

Taglist: @sleeplessmidnight @thequeenofhelllll @thewinchesterchronicles @just-me00000 @hopethemikaelsonheir @darkswanordie

Part 1  Part 8

I woke up being placed on a bed. I whimper when a pain shoots up my arm.

“Sorry.” Dean says I open my eyes seeing him sitting on the bed beside me.

“Where am I?” I ask looking around the room.

I must have been in some kind of basement there was no windows. The furniture in the room looked older. There was guns along with other strange things on the walls.

“My room.” Dean says pulling at his sleeve it making me look down at it.

“Your bleeding.” I say looking at he dark stain.

“I’m fine. A simple cut I’ll patch it up in a bit. How are you?”

“What happened?” I ask memories of what my mother did to me.

“My mother, what, why did she do that to me? I thought she was dead.”

“That wasn’t your mother. Her body was possessed by a demon.”

“She told me she was that she made a deal.”

“Well then she turned into a demon.”

“Demons are real now?”

“Everything is real.” Says a voice making me jump.

I turn to look at the door seeing a dark haired man standing there dressed in a trench coat. His blue eyes seemed to bore into me, like he was reading my soul.

“Y/n this is Cas. A friend of mine that forgets that humans need space.” Dean says glaring at him.

“Humans? Your not human?” I ask looking at him sitting up my stomach throbbing.

“I’m an angel.” He says flatly.

“This is to much.” I say trying to get out of bed.

I scream when it feels like I’m being cut all over again. A white hot pain shooting threw my body.

“Y/n!” Dean says gently grabbing me.

“You okay?”

“It hurts.” I moan out holding my chest my heart pounding.

“She’s going into shock.” I faintly hear as lights invade my vision.

When I wake up I’m in the same place telling me that everything that has happened wasn’t a dream. Dean was a hunter, my mom was a demon that he killed. On top of that they had an angel friend.

The room was empty but I was in new clothes and fine. Completely fine. I sit up it not hurting at all. Lifting my shirt there was only a faint scar as if what happened, happened a decade ago.

Climbing out of bed I check the rest of my body it all the same.

Did magic exist too?

I walk to the open door finding it attached to a large hallway. I started walking coming to what looked like a library except for the giant war map in the second room.

There was steps leading to a door I thought about taking until I heard clattering plates.  

I walked down another hallway hearing voices.

“She’s gonna be fine. Cas healed her.” says what I think to be Sam.

“That’s not what I meant. She didn’t get to ease into this she got kidnapped and almost used in a spell to summon God knows what.” Dean says the sound of someone banging a table making me jump.

“Hello.” Says a voice behind me.

I spin around to see the trench coat guy.

“Forgive me I did not mean to scare you.”

“How did you do to me?” I ask wrapping my arms around myself.

“I healed you. I told you I am an angel.” He says cocking his head to the side like a confused dog.

“What does that mean?”

“I think you should let Dean explain. He is worried about you.”

I nod following him down the hall into what is a large kitchen. Everything stainless steel.

“Your awake.” Dean says moving towards me.

I take a step back making him stop.

“Your scared of me.” He says clenching his jaw.

“No.” I say shaking my head.

“I just… It’s a little much to take in.”

“I understand.” He says nodding.

“I’ll give you some space.” He says walking past me making me feel hollow.

I hurt him.

“Are you hungry?” Sam asks making me look at him.

“We got pizza. Though Dean hasn’t eaten any.”

“He don’t when he’s worried.” I say walking down the one step and sitting at the table with Sam.

Cas somehow disparaging leaving us two alone.

“He told me about the time you almost died a few years back. He said he didn’t eat for a few days.” I say my arms still wrapped around me.

“You cold?”

I shake my head.

“I don’t want to fall apart.” I say honestly.

“You can if you want. We both have a few times.” He says smiling kindly.

“I don’t understand what’s happening to me. I feel like I’m going crazy.”

“Your not. You just saw things you don’t believe in. Your brain is trying to figure out what’s real.”

“What is real?”

“Most everything but we can start with the easy stuff.” He says getting up and picking up a journal on the counter.

“This was our dads. He wrote about everything he knew about everything. It might give you some answers and most likely a lot of questions I’ll be happy to answer.

I sit with Sam just reading over everything. Him explaining things. It honestly made me feel better knowing they knew how to kill everything in this book. It also explains why Dean was the way he was. The life they lived for so long. No wonder he was hurt. He’s lost so many people already.

I left Sam in the kitchen and found Dean in the weird Map room. Him sitting drinking. He looked angry but his cheeks were wet.

“Hey.” I say softly making his head snap in my direction.

“Hey.” He says pulling his feet from the chair and setting his drink down.

He quickly wipes his face as if we both don’t know he was crying.

Picking at my fingers I take a breath.

“I’m sorry.” I say not looking at him.

“Your sorry?”

“I should have let you explain… I was- I’m scared Dean.” I say looking up at him his blood shot eyes making mine water.

“I don’t want to lose you.”

“Who said I’m going anywhere?”

“What if you do is dangerous. If this is gonna work how am I meant to know your okay?” I ask swallowing the thump in my throat.

“If this is gonna work? You mean your not leaving?” He asks standing up and moving to stand in front of me.

The hope in his eyes making the tears roll down my cheeks.

“No I’m staying right here. If you’ll have me.” I say smiling.

Grinning he presses his mouth to mine making my heart skip. Wrapping his arms around him I kiss him back as he picks me up and swings me around.

I giggle him setting me down.

“I love you.” He says holding my face.

“I’m not ever leaving you alone again.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.” He says kissing me again.

I leaned on the wall watching Dean wrestle his brother. Them pinning each other only to break free and try again.

I flinched when I hear a crack.

“Alright that’s enough.” I say clapping my hands walking to them in the bunkers gym.

“Let me see.” I say looking at Sam’s bleeding nose.

“Your a meant to be training not braking each other.” I say glaring at Dean him smirking.

“He’s getting sloppy.” He says smiling.

“Your being a bad influence.” I say glancing at the boys boxing in the corner.

John just turning 11 and Bobby soon to be 9.

“Boys.” Dean says making them look at him. “Don’t get clocked it hurts.” He says making me smack him Sam chuckling.

“Don’t listen to him he is joking.” I say putting my hand on my hip my back hurting.

I make a face Dean touching my arm.

“You okay Y/n?” He asks worried.

“Yes, fine she just likes japping her feet in my ribs.” I say holding my stomach it blocking the few of my feet.

Hearing a phone bus I pick up off the bench.

“Sam class starts in an hour.” I say handing him his phone.

“What’s my baby brother gonna teach today?” Dean asks wrapping his arm around me.

“Your sweaty.” I say him rubbing it on me.

“Today is the history of witches.”

“You should get Roweena to help.”

“Thought about it but changed my mind when she offered to teach them a spell.”

“Good idea.” I say.

“Mom! Kevin is getting in the way.” Bobby whines making me sigh.

I turn around to see my youngest son and all his 4 year old glory trying to climb John. Bobby trying to pull him off.

“Get off of him.” I say walking to try and detangel them.

“Your brother is not a tree.” I say them Kevin laughing.

“That’s enough. You boys go get ready for school.” Dean says using his dad voice. Which I find very attractive.

They quickly separate and run out the room declaring a race to the showers.

Sighing I rub my head.

“I gonna lose my mind.” I say feeling Dean wrap his arms around me his head resting on my shoulder.

“Just be happy Benny is still asleep.” He says talking about our freshly turned 2 year old.

“Oh thank Chuck for nap time.” I say laying my head back him kissing my neck.

“Maybe she’ll be the quiet one.” He says rubbing my stomach.

“Please take after uncle Sam.”

Smiling I move to face him wrapping my arms around his shoulders.

“Remind me again why we decided to have a big family?” I ask him playing with his hair at the nape of his neck.

“Because someone thinks I’m sexy and won’t leave me alone.” He says wiggling his eyebrows.

“More like someone gets baby fever after a few years.” I say making him blush slightly.

“What’s wrong with family?” He asks clearly embarrassed.

“Nothing. I love our family. I love you. All we need is a dog.”

“We’re not getting dog.” He says making a serious face making me giggle and press my lips to his.

He kisses me back holding me close as his whole body seems to wrap around mine. I smile into the kiss feeling happy and safe. Who would have thought this all started by a green eyed man walking into a bar.