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#please show your support in trying to make this reality
andromedavwrites · 10 months
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Raven Queen, Daughter of the Evil Queen
Concept Design for: Ever After
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burningfaith · 2 years
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aces-and-angels · 2 months
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video taken from shahed's instagram follow: @shahednhall verification source (no. 224 on el-shab-hussein/nabulsi's list)
"I like to photograph everything. I like to collect special shots because the memory is not repeated. I like to make it in my memory and the memory of everyone. I did not like to share the destruction. I did not like to share the life that has become black and white despite this reality, but my message is to show the beauty of my family and how much they deserve life. I do not want them to appear in a picture they do not like and do not want anyone wish for it. The lens of my camera will continue to transmit the most beautiful shots. Get up, fight for me, a new danger that presses
I hope you save my life before it's too late.🙏💔"
- shahed (please read & share full post here)
no one should have to showcase their suffering for others to care. sadly, people only seem to mobilize after something truly horrific happens. i am begging you all not to wait for the next tragedy. there is no pause button, no reprieve, no escape from the suffering these families face on a daily basis. they all need your help now.
if you don't know her already, shahed is a 21 year old who used to be a student at al-azhar university before the genocide began. with both her parents having taken ill, she is the sole provider for her family right now, including her five siblings, youngest of whom is just a baby.
shahed is currently trying to put together an evacuation fund for her younger sisters (who have hepatitis and are severely ill.) they were recently removed from the clinic where they were getting treated due to overcrowding/because there were more pressing cases to be attended to, likely because of the massacres that took place days ago and are still happening today.
there is no room left for people's complacency-- it's okay if you're unable to donate right now-- what's not okay is assuming others will pick up your slack. just because your dash is full of 🍉content doesn't mean that's the case for others. you taking a second out of your day to spread shahed's campaign brings her that much closer to her goal. please do whatever you can to help her out.
SHAHED NEEDS TO REACH $40K USD BY THE END OF THE JULY IN ORDER TO GET HER FAMILY TO SAFETY
current stats: $34,137 raised
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---
tagging for reach (sorry yall- if you wish to be removed from this list, please let me know, no hard feelings🖤)
@timetravellingkitty @meaganfoster @briarhips @mazzikah @mahoushojoe
@rhubarbspring @schoolhater @pcktknife @transmutationisms @sawasawako
@feluka @terroristiraqi @irhabiya @wellwaterhysteria @deepspaceboytoy
@post-brahminism @junglejim4322 @kibumkim @neechees @mangocheesecakes
@kyra45 @marnota @7bitter @tortiefrancis @toiletpotato
@fromjannah @omegaversereloaded @vague-humanoid @criptochecca @aristotels
@komsomolka @neptunerings @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @heritageposts @ot3
@amygdalae @ankle-beez @communistchilchuck @dykesbat @watermotif
@stuckinapril @violentrevolution @mavigator @lacecap @socalgal
@chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @northgazaupdates
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So high
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Warnings: sub-top! Natasha, Pussy eating, cum eating, cowgirl, breeding, one slap, and yeah.
pairings: intersex: Natasha x fem reader.
Wordcount: 1.7k
Synopsis: You and Natasha decided to let loose and have some weed to ease your mind. Then, all of a sudden, Natasha becomes very horny and has a hard time fucking you.
A/n: Fear me because I'm back. This is going to be kind of bad and short as I get back into my flow, yk. Sorry. I didn't know how to end this, and this synopsis is so bad because I've never written one before for Smut.
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"B-baby stop moving." Natasha slurs out to you as she has a firm grip on your ass. Her hard cock brushes up and down your thighs.
Soft moans and whimpers leave your mouth as you feel Natasha use her numb hands to get some friction on her crotch off of your pussy. Her eyes are bloodshot red and small mumbles leave her mouth about how hard she wants to fuck you.
"Fuck babe-can barely put my cock in your pussy." Her free hand is holding up the blunt to the side of your ass as she tries to push her cock into your pussy, which keeps on slipping out. A small smirk leaves Natasha's mouth as she finally feels you.
"Natasha..." You sigh out to your girlfriend. You turn your head back from the pillow where your face is stuffed to see what Natasha is doing.
She's focused on trying her hardest to put her cock in you, every attempt landing on it slipping out and bumping your clit. Her Ralph Lauren boxers are halfway down her thighs. Your eyes wander up her body slowly. The veins connecting to her v-line were more evident than ever. The faster she breathed, the more her abs accentuated.
"D-don't even worry babe, I..I got it. Swear." Natasha grunts out. Her hands finally being able to push her cock into you. A sudden moan leaves Natasha's mouth as she inches herself into you.
"Feels good, Nat, oh my god." You moan out into the pillow as you feel Natasha bottom out into you. You can still hear her loud moans. You can tell the weed the two of you did earlier had a more considerable effect on her than you.
"Shit, can't even move y/n." She mutters out as she falls on top of your body, her moans getting louder as you clench around her.
"Natasha?" you ask her. Her hands are wrapped around your waist as she quite literally clings to you.
Natasha appeared content with the situation at hand as she quietly spoke to herself once again, her lips moving almost imperceptibly. But you weren't. She got you all worked up so that she could fall right into your embrace.
"Holy fuck Natasha, what are you doing?"
"I'm fucking you." She mutters out to you and kisses her neck as her hips are still frozen in you.
As she moves her hips with gentle grace, a smile plays on her lips, exuding confidence as she asserts her claim over you. Her hands are under you on the bed as you are barely supporting the muscular weight that she has just put on top of you. Natasha's eyes are closed in a daze as she sets a reality of her fucking you.
"I-is it good?" She whines out into your ear as her hips make minor dents. It was filling; you can't even lie to yourself about her size. But, it wasn't filling enough to get you off.
"Natasha?" Your voice echoes softly in the dimly lit room as you gently call out to her, the sound barely audible amidst her. With a heavy heart, you turn your gaze, your eyes fixing upon her limp body draped heavily across your own.
"Oh-fuck, please keep on moaning o-out my name like that. Making you feel so good, I know I am."
"I knew this was a bad idea."
You groan audibly as you reluctantly switch positions with Natasha so she is at the bottom and you're at the top. Her dazed expression and lack of responsiveness just show you how truly out of it she is. Your hand quickly meets her cheeks and slaps it, bringing her out of her daze.
"Ouch! Tha-" She abruptly halts her sentence and lifts her gaze towards you. Her red eyes are now fixated on your body in all of your glory. How she isn't in control anymore, I mean, all she wanted to do was please you.
"W...what are you doing" She whines out, her hands quickly roaming up to your boobs to fondle with them. A small grunt leaves her mouth as you move your hips, which has her halting her movements on your chest and looking straight up at you.
"I'm getting myself off Natasha." You lean down and whisper into her ear.
"I-I thought I already did that...did I not?" She quickly pulls your body off of her chest to look at you in the eyes. Looking down at her, you see some of her hair falling out from the perfectly loose bun she had about an hour ago. Her mouth is agape. And her eyes are hazy as they look up yours, not letting go of the contact.
"Baby, take a wild guess. You're high out of your mind," You tell her and remove her flimsy arms away from you as you sit back on her cock. She groans again, feeling the movement, and you smile at her sensitivity.
"Sorry, I just wanted to make you feel good," she whispers softly as if she doesn't want you to hear. Her voice is tinged with vulnerability. Her eyes clouded as she quickly drew her faze away from you. She absentmindedly traces the contours of your thighs with her blunt nails, leaving faint, uneven lines along your skin.
You let out a low gasp, leaning down to kiss her gently before pulling back, the warmth of the moment tingling on your lips. "I know you did, Natasha," you murmur softly, your voice filled with tenderness and understanding. "I mean, do you think you could still help?"
As she shoots her eyes up to you, you smirk and look down at her. "How about this, you just lay there and let me work...and when I need help, you can help me, okay?"
She quickly nods with her flushed-out face and puts her hands on your hips. You quickly maneuver your arms on her shoulders and start moving your hips back and forth against her cock. You throw your head out, let out a low moan, and grip Natasha's shoulders tighter.
She's already lost in pleasure. Her whines and moans are becoming louder as you move against her sensitive cock. She moves her hands to your ass and leaves them there as she thinks she's helping you fuck yourself on her cock.
"This f-fucking pussy is so warm and fuck, tight. Y/n, please, oh god." She pants out to you like a dog. She's in awe as she watches you ride the loving life out of her.
Your hips fasted their pace, and both of your moans started overlapping with each other as you were both lost in pleasure. You lean down into her once more and move your hips up in down her length. You lean down on her neck and close your eyes as you feel Natasha buck up into you simultaneously, hitting that spot that makes you go crazy.
She uses one of her hands to hold your back, and the other has a firm grip on your ass.
"N-no Y/n, I'm going to cum p..please," She whines out to her, her hips starting to buck into you more, and you moan out into her ear. She uses all of her willpower and starts moving your ass up and down her cock, which has her seeing stars as you roll your eyes back from pure ecstasy.
She lets out a few loud moans and grunts before filling you up with her hot cum. Her hands are gripping your ass, and she's mumbling into your ear.
She finally lets go of the tight hold she has on your ass, and you sit up, which causes her body to twitch a bit as she is even more sensitive than before.
"You ready to help me now?"
She looks up at you with lidded eyes and a confused look.
"Don't look at me like that, Nat, I didn't get off yet."
"Oh-that's right. H..how can I help? Please let me help. Please." She begs to you. "Just tell me what you need, and I'll do everything possible. Fuck-you can sit on my face, you-" Her whining gets cut off by you slowly getting off of her length and onto her face.
That's the first good idea you've had today, Nat. You let out a long sigh as Natasha gets to work. Her hands are almost immediately on your ass, gripping it with her strong hands.
Moans flow out of your mouth as Natasha works her tongue up and down your folds, her nose being pressed into your clit adds a significant amount of pressure that had your head thrown back.
Natasha was eating your pussy like it was the last meal she would ever have; she whimpered loudly into your pussy, sending the uttermost pleasurable sensations through you. She lapped up your clit like she starving, and you were the only food that was around. She loved tasting you; she'd eat your pussy 24/7.
"N-nat, oh my god," You moan out to her as your eyes flutter shut. She only whimpers more, desperate to please you, to have you cum on her tongue. It was nasty, a nasty sight for someone to walk in on.
You shuddered as the tension was building up in your core. The rapid and longing swirls of her tongue were getting to you. She was going absolutely crazy over you. Wetness leaked from her chin and chest as she worked her mouth.
"Don't fucking stop Natasha," You whine out to her, desperate to release. She was just as hopeless as you to finally taste you on her skillful tongue.
"Please cum for me, y/n. Oh god, please." It's muffled and hard to hear as she pushes your pussy down onto her face, trying to get as close as she can. This girl is smothering herself, but she doesn't care.
Her tongue runs through your care and sucks your clit one last time before you come. Natasha graciously laps her tongue over your pussy, savoring the taste of you. You quickly gasp and pull your hips away from her, moving to sit on her abs.
As you catch your breath, you gaze down at her. Her cheeks are flushed a deep crimson, accentuating the beads of sweat glistening on her forehead and the bridge of her nose. The bottom of her face is soaked with your juices, her lips glistening wet.
"Was that good?"
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tojis-gf · 4 months
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lactation kink w/ toji x reader
an: okok this has been something i've wanted to actually indulge in for a minute and i'm rlly nervous abt it >_< if you aren't into this stuff, pls just skip past. + not proofread !
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it was any other tuesday night, toji had put your two children down for bed which you couldn't appreciate more as you've been so exhausted. sure you're on maternity leave, but being at home doing chores around the house is so exhausting on your poor little pregnant body, especially with having to take care of two littles : ( but toji makes sure to help out when he's around and not working.
you're currently 27 weeks along and as of lately, your breasts have began to leak. toji doesn't mind, if anything, it makes the blood rush straight down to his cock. it absolutely turns him on. you're almost positive that toji loves seeing you pregnant because of how dense and plump your tits get, all filled up with milk for his baby that he put inside your warm womb.
as you watch some shitty reality tv show to try and relax for a bit, you begin to massage your breasts, as they're so sore, heavy, and full of milk. toji makes his way over to the couch, plopping down next to you, noticing your discomfort, "what's wrong baby" he says, reaching out to squeeze your tits, "are the girls feelin' extra full t'day? hm, y' want me t'make em' feel better hm?" he says with a smirk on his face. he knows the answer to that, he just wants to hear you beg for him to suck on your tits. "mhm, they're s'full, pretty please baby, make me feel better" you whine and of course he's wasting no time, not even bothering to lift your cute little lace tank top that can barely support your tits, rather pulling them out, letting the neck-line rest under them.
he begins with your right tit, mouth latched onto your nipple, sucking like there is no tomorrow, your sweet milk dripping from his mouth onto your tit, eventually dripping onto your pants but you didn't care, it felt sooo good. when it comes to your tits, that is definitely toji's oral fixation. if he could suck on them all day long he 100% would. he peers up at you through dazed eyes, drunk off your taste, "how does that feel babe, feels fuckin good right?" he says before switching to your left tit, attacking it like there was no tomorrow, you swear you could cum just from the sight of this "hah~ y-yeah baby, feels s'good mhm..keep goin' pleaseee" you babble in even more of a daze than he's in.
at this point, he's just kissing all over them, leaving love bites on the parts that'll be non-visible in tops, your nipples are so sore at this point you're unsure you'll even be able to bare it any longer, as much as you do enjoy all the love toji shows for your tits. "b-baby, thank you" you say as you go down to kiss the top of his head, "as much as i love you sucking on my tits, i'm starting to become a bit more sore than i initially was" you giggle, "lay here though, i'd like that a lot...". and he does, head resting against your bare chest as the two of you drift off into a slumber, quickly interrupted by the cries of your two-year old son. "don't worry, i got it, relax mama" he says, planting a kiss onto your chest, rising from the couch to tend to your son.
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anantaru · 6 months
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thinking about boxer!wriothesley who always pays for your nails to get done bc he likes to see your pretty manicured hands wrapped around his cock after he wins his match 💅🏼 I’ve been suffering from wrio brain rot lately 🥴
⊹ ‧₊˚ ᰔ cw. handjob & cock kisses, boxer! wriothesley, petname: doll & baby, cumming in your mouth, established relationship // ꒰ᐢ⸝⸝⸝⸝ᐢ꒱ ♡ fem! reader
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"let me look at them baby, show ‘em," a sinning shine materializes on wriothesley's pupils, accompanied by a small grunt in his throat— and his tousled hair was reflective of the light in the empty store room, glinting at his current state.
he was still high off the adrenaline from his fight, sweaty and still trying to regulate his breathing. yet most of the damage was shown by his knuckles, although they were covered by white bandages, the irritated flesh peaks through the material to expose a scarlet red thudding on his skin.
you gently take his hands into yours before kissing his knuckles, holding him close.
a grunt leaves his throat at the sensual sight before your body settles between his muscular thighs, his hands guiding you, "you like the color i picked out?" a cheeky grin traces the outlines of your face as you look up at his focused gaze.
being bold, you sweep your pretty nails towards his bulge, "see, they're even a little sharp, i might scratch you on accident," you tease and tauntingly glide the sharp edges of your nails over his concealed erection, featherlight, and leaning down to kiss him through his pants.
wriothesley was panting harshly as he looks down at you, his facial profile holding on to mischief. he sighs, watching eagerly how you're playing around with his belt as he aids you in taking off his pants, "yeah, baby," he hums sweetly, cock twitching at the hopping click of his belt springing free, "you're so fucking hot, doll, the color looks gorgeous on you,"
wriothesley cannot stop himself from complimenting you in every way imaginable when he's on the brink of choking at the painful sensation on his cock, his breath erratic as you kiss his ache away with your plush lips granting him a break.
the tip of his cock was peaking through the thin material of his boxers as wriothesley casts his underwear down to leave it piled up around his knees before wrapping his rough palm around himself, squeezing at the base, "you wanna show me the color better?" he winks, stroking his stiffened cock and whines out your name.
"yeah, please let me do it," you pout briefly as he lightly smears his tip over your mouth to bump it against your bottom lip, "easy now," he coos, "let me play with it first," as he hurries it over your plush lips— a sheen lace of lipgloss connecting to his cock and smearing a trail of sticky liquid behind.
the foul sight of it almost made him cream on the spot, and how your fingers were now getting bolder, fluttering over the rills of his sore muscles and only adding to the desire to feel your hand clamp around him.
and it's the reality he's so grateful for when your hand pulls his own away, so you could wrap your palm around his cock, taking over, "did you hear me cheer for you today?" you start with slow strokes, yet he's choking on a string of groans just by looking at you doing it for him, "i wanted to support you so badly," you slope your body forward to touch his tip with your mouth, flipping it left and right over your lips before kissing the oozing head.
"fuck, you're gonna make me cum like that," wriothesley chokes out, placing his fist against his mouth as he bites into it, muffling his erratic groans, "fuck— fuck... fuck doll," his voice cracks as you go on, squeezing him at the base and working him through a nice orgasm that would rip through him in a heart beat.
your lips kiss over his shaft and mess him up, not only with his own milky pre oozing from the slit, but your sparkly lipgloss sticking over the skin so lusting, yes, it felt so dirty and your hand was drenched in all kinds of fluids now— which well, it was disgusting, but in the most pleasurable way imaginable.
wriothesley rasps into his chest, "fuck... i'm gonna cum, ‘gonna cum doll," as he pulls his head back and scrunches his eyes shut. he spasms around your hand shifting into a faster, more efficient tempo as you jerk him off, trying harder and harder to gloss over every inch of his length.
"you wanna cum in my mouth?" the simple imagery you laid out after asking him almost took all the willpower inside of his nerves and body to not climax and ruin it, "yeah.. please— please.." he holds against your shoulder as you part your jaw and slide him inside your warm heat.
how your throat flexes around his tip and your tongue presses into the underside of his cock was sensational— the affectivity of your hot mouth made his eyes water, fully leaning into you as he spills himself with a loud groan and a chant of your name huffed out desperately.
the soreness in your throat was more prominent than ever but was immediately smothered by a warm, sticky load of his seed as you're hiccuping on the wave of cum entering your mouth.
"fuck, that's good, yeah..." he moans, "don't swallow it, show me instead," as he commands shamelessly, a rough palm shortly after cupping your cheek as you pull him off your mouth.
you drag your tongue out to present your boyfriend a wickedly beautiful look of his milky cum slithering all from your tongue towards the tip of the wet muscle, a small droplet falling to the ground as he smirks mischievously;
"now, swallow."
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©2024 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify
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marvelsswansong · 10 months
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show and tell
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summary: a white rose at the train station. his hand in yours at the zoo. his mother's golden mirror. does he love you or is he simply trying to gain the public's favour and secure the Plith prize? you're unsure. and so is he, until he very much isn't.
tags: coriolanus snow x fem!reader, slow burn (ish), fluff, angst, technically a happy ending but quite dark, purely based off the movie but I take some creative detours, CW for violence, mentions of starvation, toxic/manipulative behaviors and a semi-dark!snow (please read at your own discretion, take care of yourself above all else :))
☆ word count: 5.6K+ words ☆
⚠️ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐈 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞.⚠️
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Coriolanus hates waiting. 
The stillness, the eerie silence of an early morning at the Capitol train station. It eats away at his core.
His mouth tastes like copper, his throat's starting to itch from the dryness and there's a brief moment of fear as he ponders if he's making a huge mistake. A sharp whistle ringing through the station signals the train's arrival, and as his eyes adjust to the billowing grey smoke and a sea of white (the peace keepers), the flower in his left hand suddenly feels heavy. As if the weight of the situation is starting to bear on his shoulders.
He wasn't supposed to be here. If all had gone to plan, he would've already been the recipient of the Plinth Prize and taken the first car back home to buy his grandma'am some chocolates and Tigris a new dress. No more worrying. No more surviving on dwindled fortunes. No more pretending to fit in with high society. 
Then, of course, the rules had to change. Viewership was down and it was of both Dean Highbottom's and Dr Gaul's opinion that what was missing was spectacle. Now, whoever the best mentor was in transforming their tribute into prime entertainment would win the prize. 
"Your role is to turn these tributes into spectacles. Not survivors." 
The silence that hung after this announcement in the Academy was heavy, but Coriolanus knew better than to show his true emotions on his face. After all, if there was one thing that he knew how to do as the star student of the Academy: it was to plan. And when he saw your... unruly introduction to the public, sneaking a snake down a woman's dress before cussing out the audience, it dawned on him that it would be a tall order to endear you to the public.
But not impossible.
The sounds of the tributes being roughly unloaded off the platform snaps him back into reality, his eyes easily landing on your figure as you jump off the train, your upper arms supported by the tribute (Jessup, Coriolanus recalls his name being) standing next to you. Pushing through the soldiers, the blonde nearly breaks into a small sprint to catch up to you as you turn your head upon hearing the sound of hurried footsteps.
"Welcome to the Capitol." the strange man in front of you says, before holding out a pristine white rose. It's a peculiar looking flower, you think, a kind of flower you've never seen before (at least, certainly not back in your home district). It looks almost artificial, you think, with how perfectly white and untouched its petals are.
The blonde assesses your cautious glance - the sunlight hitting the under color of your irises perfectly in a glistening twilight - and a fleeting thought passes by, that the tv camera didn't do your natural beauty justice. He has to suppress a smirk when you finally respond, narrowing your eyes at him with your arms crossing above your chest.
"You seem like you shouldn't be here."
He chuckles at that.
"I'm not supposed to be. And yet here I am." A pause. "But I'm your mentor. Coriolanus Snow."
That's a first, you think. Mentors for tributes. 
"And what does my mentor do except bring me roses?" you question, flicking the buds with your fingers. Coriolanus just smiles. 
"I do my best to take care of you." 
Your supposed mentor says it so sincerely, you think, and he's obviously charming with his devilishly handsome looks and low whisper. But there's something that stops you from holding out your hand and taking the rose from his fingers. You suppose he isn't lying - after all, what would be the point of it - but there's something in his eyes that you can't quite explain. 
Something that makes your stomach flutter in both excitement and dread.
"Move." the soldier behind you then barks, shoving you and Jessup forward. You decide to give your mentor one last grin and a quiet "see you later", thinking that's going to be the last you see of him for a while.
The last thing you expect is for him to jump into the back of the vehicle alongside the other tributes, drawing the eyre of a few who pin him against the moving vehicle and start taunting him with violence. 
"You look rather out of place." the tall boy pinning Coriolanus drawls.
"I'm not, I can assure you. I'm here for (Y/n). I'm her mentor." 
That puts the unwanted attention on you, as the other tributes begin to circle around you with sinister expressions twisting on their lips.
"Mentor, huh? How come little miss music gets one but not the rest of us?" a brunette girl drawls, eyeing you up and down.
The boy pinning Coriolanus down applies stronger pressure to his neck, and you rise in an attempt to intervene, but he meets your gaze discreetly and motions for you to remain seated. 
"You all have a mentor, they're just... not here." he croaks. 
"Right, and we're all supposed to believe you?" another girl, this one from district 4 you believe, taunts. "What's to say we shouldn't just kill you now?" 
The blonde shoots you a nervous look and that's when you feel pity. Just like you, he's in a foreign environment and pretending to be brave. You suppose also that he's your only ticket out, your only chance of potential success at surviving in the games.
So you intervene.
"You could kill him. But then the moment this truck stops you'll all be gathered round and killed by the peace keepers. He's clearly Capitol. And if they're willing to hang District people simply for stealing, can't imagine what killing a member of the Capitol would mean for punishment." 
That scares them off and Coriolanus sits down next to you, breathing heavily in an effort to catch his breath, before quietly thanking you.
"You really wanna thank me?" you quirk, leaning over to whisper in his ear. "Start by thinking about how I can actually win." 
The truck then suddenly comes to a halt, and the next thing you know the truck is being tipped over and the doors fly open. Coriolanus grasps your arm in lightning speed, pulling you close towards him so that he'd hit the harsh ground first, absorbing most of the impact.
When you shakily stand up on your feet, you realize you're enclosed in a large metal cage akin to that of an animal enclosure. There's even an over enthusiastic TV presenter in the background, who now seems to have noticed your mentor and begins to call out to him.
"Where are we?" you breathe out, already shivering from the autumn cold.
The blonde barely shifts, only dusting off his suit in a calm manner.
"(Y/n) (L/n) from District 12, welcome to the Capitol Zoo. Would you like to meet my neighbors?" he jokes, eyes slyly shifting to the right to refer to the small audience that has now gathered around the TV presenter. 
You hesitate, but then he takes your right hand in his before leaning over to whisper in your ear.
"You want to win, right? Good. I'd like to win as well. And the first thing you'll need to do? Perform for the cameras." Coriolanus accentuates the end of his sentence by sliding the rose behind your ear, a gesture which draws an excited reaction from the crowd.
Is your mentor doing it for the cameras or for something else? You're unsure. But given your desperation to win, and the fact that he clearly knows more about the games than you do, you decide to play along.
Warm hands twisting in the cold, Coriolanus drags your enjoined hands towards the TV camera as he does what he does best. Lie, smile, and charm the audience. Even when the attention turns to you, as Lucky Flickerman (that's his name, you learn) directs questions towards you, the blonde never lets go of your hand in his.
Before he leaves, as news of his rule-breaking spreads amongst the members of the public, you grab him out of desperation one last time.
"Please get us some food, we've been starving since the Reaping."
The blonde nods, but you can't help but feel anxious: not knowing if his previous gestures of kindness were just for show. 
-------------------------------
"Who's that for?"
Coriolanus had meant to sneak the sandwiches and cookies into his spare napkin discreetly, but of course Clemensia had to be two steps behind him, interrogating his every move. 
"Just not very hungry, that's all." he nearly grits through his teeth, forcing a fake smile.
The dark haired girl chuckles at that, shaking her head sideways.
"You don't have to lie to me, Snow. Especially me."
"... It's for (Y/n)." he quietly admits. She hums at that, picking at her own food from across the table.
"That's awfully nice of you. What, already going soft for some girl you met yesterday?" she teases, and it immediately elicits an angry refusal out of him.
"It's not like that." Coriolanus snaps, his sudden harshness making his classmate flinch in surprise. "I just... can't have her dying before the games even begin because she's not as well fed as the others." 
Clemensia scoffs, flicking the rest of her orange peel into the trash.
"Honestly, Snow, I don't know why you bother. She's clearly not going to survive. I mean, have you seen the tributes from districts 1 and 3?"
Ignoring her comments, he wordlessly slips away from the table and hails a ride down to the zoo. News of his intentions travels fast and whilst he doesn't mind Sejanus' company, it takes intense effort to force himself to look away from Arachne when she tags along and decides to taunt a caged tribute with a glass bottle. 
"You came back." you mutter, staring at the neatly wrapped napkin in disbelief. Coriolanus dislikes how surprised you sound, then hates himself more for caring about what you think. 
Why do you care what she thinks? he scolds himself. She's just a tribute you're mentoring.
"Of course I did. Can't have my tribute dying before the games even begin, now can I?" he teases, feigning nonchalant. 
The presence of academy mentors seems to have attracted a crowd, with a few photographers even pointing their lenses towards you and Coriolanus as his hand slips through the metal gates to meet yours to hand off the food. When your fingers touch his, a part of you wonders if he would've ever came back if there was no PR involved.
Too grateful and too hungry to care, you just say thank you, before breaking off a piece for Jessup and offering half a sandwich to your mentor.
"Oh no, I'm not hungry." he says out of instinct, surprised by your offering. You raise your eyebrows in response, pursing your lips.
"You sure about that? Because I could hear your stomach growl from a mile away." you retort. 
"Right. Uh, thank you." 
Biting into the soft bread, you chew, savoring every bite. A silence settles between the two of you as you both eat, right before you ask him a quiet question.
"... Did you get into a lot of trouble for what you did for me yesterday?" your eyes shine with worry, you nervously looking up at him for an answer. He finds himself again surprised by how much you seem to care. 
Yes, he wants to say. I nearly got myself disqualified as a mentor and it would've been the end of my family's future in the Capitol. But he swallows his thoughts down, alongside the dry taste of the tuna sandwich.
"Not much. Actually, I was able to convince the gamemaster, Dr Gaul, to implement a few changes to the games."
"Really, like what?"
"To let the public send you donations. That way, I could send you supplies you needed into the arena - food, water, medicine. It'd mean having to do the extra job of playing to the public and getting them to root for your survival, but with a voice like yours, the songbird of Panem -"
Your smile drops at that, your gaze turning stern at his suggestion.
"I only sing when I please for an audience I choose." your eyebrows furrow, your usually sweet expression melting into something more sour. It's oddly cute, he thinks. 
"I know, but I'm really going to need you to try. It's for your own survival. Our survival." he emphasizes, staring right into your eyes. You can't suppress your sad smile at that, crumbling the empty napkin in your hands.
"Are you sure it's not just for your survival?"
Your question haunts Coriolanus that night, alongside the sounds of broken glass and pained gasps as Arachne lies bleeding on the ground, having been stabbed in the neck by one of the tributes. When he quickly runs to his classmate, he doesn't get to see your expression, as you're ripped away by Jessup pulling you into safety in an instant and peace keepers swarm the scene in an effort to remain calm.
When he's back home and the crimson blood coating his hands have dried from where he was holding his dying classmate's wounds, he wonders if there's any truth to your answer.
-------------------------------
Everything changes at the arena tour.
You've not had much sleep. You're confused, you're angry, but most of all you've been haunted by your conflicting feelings towards your mentor and the name he'd called you - songbird. A silly little songbird, you think spitefully. 
To sing and charm the very same public who had doomed her to a violent game of death. 
It was absurd, really, that he'd even ask that. It made your stomach churn and your head ache at the thought of cheapening your craft for something so juvenile.
And yet, when you spot the familiar red suit and white blonde hair in the mass of other mentors at the arena, you can't help but feel warmth in your chest and stomach. A part of you even feels lucky, given that the other mentors seem to waste their time insulting their tributes or being too afraid to talk to them. Whilst Coriolanus, on the other hand, seems to be full of ideas to ensure your survival.
"The game master liked my suggestions. So the donations system is going to be implemented, with a broadcast beforehand for the tributes to get a chance to endear themselves to the public for donations." He's speaking so fast that you almost think he enjoys explaining the games to you. "Now what this means is that assuming you get enough donations, when the bell goes off, you don't go for the weapons. You don't fight. You just run as fast as you can, hide and stay alive for as long as you can." 
"How can you even be sure I'll get enough donations for you to be able to send supplies?" you mutter, looking around at the other tributes. "A lot of these folks are a lot taller and stronger than I am. They've got a much better chance at surviving than I do."  
Coriolanus surprises you by taking both of your hands in his, squeezing your palms tight in his cold palms.
"I know, but we have something none of the others have."
You scrunch your face in confusion.
"What's that?"
"A story. A strong connection between you and me, a Capitol mentor and a District 12 tribute. Not to mention, your incredible singing and songwriting. Match that with my knack for public relations and we'll have enough donations to send you any supplies necessary for your victory in the games."
You realize then that Coriolanus is unlike anyone else you've ever met. So confident, so sure, so perceptive of other people and their secret desires and pitfalls. His unwavering commitment to his beliefs is admirable, if not almost foolish, but you keep that part to yourself.
"How're you so sure I'll even survive the first few minutes?" you push back, still unconvinced, though you don't pull away from his hold. "And, again, I don't just sing for anyone."
The blonde opens his mouth to respond, but he's interrupted when a sudden cascade of dust and fire crumbles down from the ceiling of the arena. The sound of a bomb exploding reverberates as you're both thrown off of your feet by the impact. Your head is still ringing from the chaos when Jessup pulls at your sleeves, commanding you to walk away from the wreckage. 
Rising onto shaky legs, you even spot another tribute running from the guards towards a blown out hole on the side of the building. And when your eyes meet with Coriolanus' frantic ones, his lower half trapped underneath rubble, you both recognize that you now have an unbridled chance to escape - 
But you don't.
To the blonde's complete shock, you instead shove your friend off, screaming as you lift the heavy cement column with all your strength in an effort to pry the debris off of his body. With the help of a few peace keepers, it works, but Coriolanus falls into unconsciousness quickly as he succumbs to the excruciating pain of crushed ribs and bruised limbs.
The last thing he sees before he fades into darkness is your teary eyes, a sight he so badly wants to fix by wiping away your tears with his fingers... 
When he eventually wakes, it's in a dark hospital next to his grandma'am and sister. There's a roar on the television screen as you're brought onto the broadcast, shy smile and a glittering guitar in hand. It hits him that you're actually going to sing. 
"I didn't have a chance to... uh... write a new song. But I'd like to dedicate this performance to someone very special who's recently been hurt." you say into the mike, your eyes clearly brimming with nerves and doubt. 
As you sing, there's a tight sensation in Coriolanus' chest once the lyrics settle into his mind - a small voice whispers in his mind that it's jealousy, for you singing about a boy back in your home town who broke your heart - but it's overwhelmed by the feelings of gratitude and awe that you'd ended up doing what he asked you to do. All that, after selflessly saving his life.
"A...are you okay, Coryo?" is all Tigris asks, brushing his hair back and gently guiding him back down onto bed upon seeing his expression twist into one of discomfort.
"She could've run." 
"What?"
"At the arena. The blast blew open a large opening on the side of the stadium. I saw one of the tributes actually make it out that way." he lets out a shaky breath, hating you for what you've done to him to make him feel this way. "Damn it, Tigris. She could've run. She could've-"
A single tear drops from his left eye and onto his injured palm, his weak voice giving away his true emotions.
"She could've saved herself from even having to participate in the games. But she stayed. She fucking stayed behind to lift the debris off of me."
"She saved your life." his sister finishes for him, the atmosphere turning somber as she wraps her arms around his shoulder. "I'm just so glad that you're both safe." 
As you retreat from the screen, the donation numbers only piling up higher as Lucky Flickerman closes out the broadcast, a hot fire lights up in Coriolanus' stomach. 
He has to save you.
No matter what it takes.
--------------------------------------
"You know he's just using you, right?"
After the broadcast, once it's revealed that you were given the largest amount of donations out of all the other tributes, Coral from District 4 corners you backstage. 
"Pardon?" you fake ignorance, a small smile playing on your lips, which only seems to aggravate the girl further. 
"Your pretty boy mentor. He's only been faking all sweet for you to get the public to send you donations. In fact, I bet he didn't even bother to try and pull himself out of the wreckage so that he could get more public sympathy.
You snap at that, all fake modesty melting away in an instant.
"You have no idea what the fuck you're talking about, Coral. Coriolanus isn't like that." you spit, but all she does is look down at you with a nasty smirk on her lips.
"Oh really? And how would you know, little songbird? Think he'd care about someone from district 12? And why do you think he wants you to win so badly? Because he's a good person?" she mocks, her face now a mere inches away from yours. "No. I reckon it's more for the prize money." 
You can't sleep that night at the zoo, tossing and turning in the dark. Your mind can't seem to rest, torn between the adrenaline and dread for the games tomorrow, alongside the constant worry over Coriolanus' wellbeing and doubts over his genuinity and trustworthiness.
Coral's just trying to get in my head. you repeat to yourself, over and over again. You're on the edge of sleep, exhausted and upset by your conflicting emotions, when you hear a familiar voice coming from the darkness. 
It sounds like Coriolanus. 
You sit up straight, and it's true: he's here, and he's whispering your name repeatedly, beckoning you towards the front of the cage and away from your sleeping competitors. Suddenly, the overwhelming exhaustion and fatigue disappears, and you find yourself gravitating towards the only person you've been thinking about for the past 24 hours.
"Coryo, you're... you're alright." you sigh out, almost overwhelmed with relief. You don't even realize you're crying until his hands reach up and brush away your tears, his warm hand a stark contrast to the freezing cold of the night.
"I am. All thanks to you, songbird." he breathes out, his fingers tracing the ripples of your cheeks. His head feels dizzy and his hands tremble as he searches his pockets for his mother's golden compact mirror. 
"Don't call me that." you weakly laugh, as he does too. "What's this?" you ask, staring at the object he’s folded gently into your hands. 
"It's for you to use in the arena. Now listen to what I say very carefully. Don't breathe this in, don't spill it on yourself, and only use it when you really need to." he slowly explains, as if he's terrified that you're going to harm yourself by merely carrying it in your pockets. 
"Is... is this allowed? For you to sneak in and give me this?" you whisper, looking around your surroundings, but it's pitch black. 
The blonde purses his lips, using every muscle in his body to keep his expression neutral.
No, it's certainly not allowed. I am risking my life, as well as my family's future, by doing this.
"That's not important. What is important is that the blast from the arena has created a hole leading out to a bunch of service tunnels. I tested it out myself, it leads towards the outside, far away from the peace keepers." 
"Wait, I don't understa-"
Desperation grabs a hold of him, and it's a foreign feeling - the crushing despair of wanting to protect someone that he can't, the burning urge to want to put someone else ahead of him for once.
"What I need you to do tomorrow, (Y/n), is to run. The moment the alarm rings, don't even think of running towards the weapons or fighting the others. Don't even hide anymore. Just… just run towards the tunnels, by yourself, and get out."
"But what about Jessup-" you hiccup. Your head's spinning, confused and horrified by your mentor's change of plans and the prospect of leaving behind your friend to die in the arena. 
"Forget about him." Coriolanus snaps. Suddenly, his eyes are cold and his voice is firm, commanding you as if you have no choice in the matter. "In there, he's as dangerous as the other tributes. You can't trust anyone, not even your supposed friends, okay? The games, they-" he chokes on his own words, and there's something again in Coriolanus' eyes that you can't quite decipher. "They bring out the worst in people. Promise me you'll run."
It makes your stomach twist in anxiety.
"I-"
"Please." 
As he begs, his face crumbles, his voice so desperate and feeble that you can't find it in yourself to say no. 
"I... I'll try." you relent, and he lets out a sigh of relief at your agreement. 
"Good. Perfect." He takes your head in his hands and softly kisses your temple. "I won't let you die in there, okay? Just like you took care of me after the explosion. I'm going to take care of you."
"I'm your mentor. I do my best to take care of you." 
Coriolanus' words from the train station echo in your head as you nod, pocketing the mirror deep inside your dress to hide it away from plain sight.
"Will I... will I be able to see you, after the games?" 
You immediately feel stupid for even asking that. Everyone knows winning the games merely allows your return to your home district. And on all logical accounts, it wouldn't make any sense for the man to give up his life in the Capitol to follow you back to 12.
But he smiles at your innocent question, only nodding whilst squeezing your hands in the dark. To your feeble heart and mind, it feels like a genuine promise.
"Of course, my songbird. I'll do whatever it takes."
"Don't make promises you can't keep." you whisper.
"I never do." 
And for the first time, you think you actually believe him wholeheartedly.
----------------------------------
You can't believe it. 
You've won.
You were so sure you were going to die once the snakes had been released, eyes closing shut once the venomous snakes began to crawl up your skin, but as you continued to sing... The reptiles simply slithered by your side, remaining docile and non-threatening. And based on the snakes' sudden change of behavior and Highbottom's scowl when he announced you as the victor of the 10th Hunger Games - "consider yourself lucky, little girl, as it seems your mentor was willing to break more than a few rules for you" - your stomach churns at the realization that Coriolanus kept his promise.
He did whatever it took to get you out. 
Even cheating. 
You've only heard whispers of the punishments for cheating at the Capitol. But based on the frequent hangings of rebels in your home district, you can't imagine that the punishment would be very kind.
Weeks have passed since your victory, since the last time you've even seen Coriolanus, but it does nothing to erase him from your mind. You still see his faint silhouette in the mornings, when your eyes have barely adjusted to the morning light and there's a pile of clothes sitting on the chair beside your bed. You think you hear his voice amongst the sea of strangers’ conversations, calling out for his 'songbird'. And you swear you see his face in every crowd at the bar.
Unbeknownst to you, Coriolanus is having the same struggles on the opposite end of the country. Luckily, bearing the last name Snow meant his punishment for cheating was to be lighter than the usual hanging: mandatory military service. District 8. But he's sure to bring his last few bills to bribe the immigration officer for a transfer to 12. 
All to come find you. 
He suffers through the first week of training - grueling hours, hanging ceremonies, endless ramblings from Sejanus about making a change for the better. He pretends not to notice Sejanus establishing connections within the rebel community, until he can’t ignore it anymore. After all, Coriolanus simply can't afford his friend’s idealism and recklessness to get him killed too, and potentially you, when you're thought to be linked to the movement by mere virtue of association.
Especially not you, Coriolanus thinks.
After the games, of having to watch you bleed, sob and fight for hours on end as he stood helplessly, only able to watch: even the passing thought of your death elicits a violent reaction in him. He'll do anything for you. 
Even if that means turning in his only friend to prove his loyalty to the Capitol.
It's an unremarkable Wednesday night for you when you're singing a song at the bar, black guitar in hand and the smell of booze thick in the air, when your eyes come across a familiar face. 
It takes you a few seconds, of course. You almost think it’s a hallucination, if it wasn’t for the sea of other soldiers surrounding him, validating his presence. His fluffy white locks are gone, replaced with a clean buzz cut. He's lost a bit of weight, his shoulders more broad and rough from military training, and the lack of expensive bright fabrics draped around his figure is jarring at first. But it suits him, you think. 
The song can't finish any faster before you're slinging your guitar to the back and rushing up to Coriolanus, immediately throwing your arms around him. He stiffens in your embrace before relaxing, his arms finding your waist and squeezing you tightly. And you can't help but savor every essence of his being: he smells of sweat and coal (unlike his Capitol uniform which always smelled of florals and clean linen) and you can feel the cool metal of his dog tags press against your collarbone at this angle.
"You came back for me." you breathe out, still not believing that he's in front of you. Your ex mentor just smiles, tapping your cheeks with his hands.
"Said I'd never break a promise, now didn't I?" 
As the next performer goes up on stage, recapturing the attention of the audience, you pull him away towards the back room, far away from the bustling crowds and twinkling lights.
"I've thought of you every day, my songbird." Coriolanus whispers against your skin once you two are away from the crowds, his head falling forwards into the nape of your neck.
Your cheeks warm at his comment, your fingers coming up to play with the dog tags around his neck, before a light chuckle escapes your lips.
"What's so funny? Did you not miss me?" the blonde teases, and you shake your head sideways in denial.
"Of course I missed you. I missed you more than you could imagine."
"Then what's the chuckle for?"
You let out a short sigh, not knowing if it’d be wise to bring it up. But all he does is encouraging you, looking deep into your eyes and nodding, urging you to say what’s on your mind. You relent, shoulders sagging. 
"It's just... when I won the games, Highbottom congratulated me. But not for winning the games. But for surviving you." you awkwardly chuckle in hopes of diffusing the seriousness of your question. "Is it true, Coryo?"
"What are you getting at?" is his response, coy and low. You can't tell if he's amused, annoyed or disturbed. 
Or all three at once.
"There's rumors, you know. I heard that you... you had to kill a tribute." you whisper, as if what you’re saying is the biggest secret in the world. "Is it true?"
Coriolanus pauses at that, the smirk on his face dropping for a fraction of a second before he's cupping your face and lifting your gaze to meet his eyes. His stare is so strong, so unwavering, almost to the point of unnerving you. But it's matched with such warmth and softness in his touch as he strokes your hair.
"You have to understand, darling… It was just like the snakes. If I hadn't rigged the game by getting the snakes used to your smell so they wouldn't attack you, you would've died. And if I hadn't killed the tribute charging at me when I had to sneak into the arena to rescue Sejanus-" he sighs, slow and long. He looks as if he’s thinking hard. "I had to, my songbird. I had to do it to protect you. To take care of you." he emphasizes.
You're not sure what kind of an answer you wanted, but you're unable to respond immediately, as it slowly dawns on you that this man both cheated and killed another person for you. 
His response to your silence is a swift kiss, calloused hands dropping to your waist to pull you in close, the gesture desperate and messy. Breathing heavily when he parts from you, he kisses you once more, this time a short peck which is more rough and demanding.
"I would do anything for you, (Y/n) (L/n). Anything for you."
Coriolanus chooses to keep quiet about the fact that technically, he could've just injured the tribute charging towards him instead. Or that it felt freeing to have ended the tribute’s life. Or that just a few hours ago, he tipped off the Capitol about Sejanus' rebellion. All in an effort to secure your unbridled safety. So that he doesn’t ever have to let go of you again.
"Now, where are your manners, my songbird? Aren't you going to thank me?" he whispers against your lips, smoothing out your hair.
"T-thank you, Coryo." you manage to stutter.
He smiles at that, kissing the top of your head as he sways you from side to side.
"Of course, love. Don't worry. We’re going to be just fine. In fact, everything will be fine from now on."
As you peak out from under his embrace, you're not so sure if you can believe him anymore.
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a/n: leave it to a new hunger games movie and Tom Blyth playing young!Snow to make me return from my 1.5 year long writing hiatus.
I'm quite nervous about this one as it's my first time writing for a semi-dark character and also because it's been so long since I posted my writing on here... But I hope you enjoyed, please leave a comment, like, reblog, etc if you liked it. If this one is received well I might go ahead and post the other Snow fics currently sitting in my drafts!!!
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lovingjingyuan · 3 months
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Hi!! I've been reading your first for awhile and I think you're such a great writer and I was wondering if I could request a yandere Sunday/welt/jingyuan/blade where the reader has depression and how they'd handle it? You could add anything you like :) thank you!
Thank you sm for the compliment. I'm so glad someone enjoys my works <333 Tbh I don't find my writing good cuz my English isn't so good for writing ;-; also when i writing this on google docs it was like 7 pages long.
Warning: 2.7K words, A bit affectionate in Jing Yuan and Aventurines part, manipulation, abuse of power, gaslighting, emotional abuse,
Info at bottom
Pairing: (Yandere) Sunday, Welt, Jing Yuan, Blade, Aventurine x Reader
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Sunday Sunday wouldn't be able to handle it well, but instead, he would unintentionally cause further damage to your mental state. It’s elusive getting you to cooperate with his subjectives. He couldn’t quite bring himself to understand why you aimlessly slumber like this, showing little to no affection and he deluges you with this subjective perfect life. You were in a gilded cage ornate into a display of artwork, but to Sunday you’ll always be that vulnerable bird, needing guidance and protection. He couldn’t grasp the idea of why you still yearn for freedom when he can provide you with everything you desire.
You reminded Sunday of the time when he and his sister Robin once took a weak bird under their wing. The bird is like you; too weak and vulnerable for this cruel reality. Yet, his subjective never appealed to your line of reasoning. To you, people are meant to make their own choices and yearn for the touch of freedom. But to him the weak must be helped and preserved by the strong and by that you’re weak. 
Instead of offering you normal support and seeking treatment for you he would isolate you further, making watch of your every movement and ensuring you’re always in his presence every second. 
To Sunday he couldn’t just let you go now, not after all his sacrifices and efforts to hold you captive in his presence. He started to lie and twisted his thoughts into believing that this is the only path to achieve mutual happiness and to ensure your safety. Yet, it further broke him even though you refuse to make and remain apathetic with him. Your constant depression and lack of motivation left him feeling adrift. You rarely are able to take care of yourself anymore leaving him completely lost.
All he can hope is for you to develop Stockholm syndrome. He prays that your depression and lack of happiness will lead you to believe he’s the only one who can mend the wounds on your heart, filling any empty void. 
“Please stop lying on the bed. You’ve been there all day. You know that’s far from healthy and will only worsen your state,” he silently pleaded with you hoping by any miracle you would follow through. This constant isolation he put you through has been driving both you and him mad. But in the end, you lost all light in you. No longer able to plead with him any further for salvation.  
You can just simply close your eyes falling further back into nihility. 
“Please, my dear, you can't keep doing this to me… to yourself-”
‘I’m fine, ' you snapped. How his heart ached at your indifference.
“No, you’re not okay. Your behavior is absolutely absurd!” he remained unfalter on the edge of the bed next to you. Sunday’s mind ran blink on ways to save you from deluging any further in depression. He could release you, but he’s scared the moment he does. You would leave him forever like the bird he and his sister raised.
He leaned in, brushing your hair aside to plant a gentle kiss on your forehead. He will continue to keep you here with him indefinitely, trying to keep his own sanity intact as well as yours. He only remains resolute to keep you here with him, refusing to open his eyes and acknowledge his wrongdoings.
“It’s not a sin. I’m doing this for the greater good.”
I believe Yandere Sunday is just manipulative in wanting to keep you, he’s no sadist but I also believe he cares a whole lot about his public image which is now RUINED! Sunday would be a good lover if you comply or not obsessed over you. Sunday would be the type to say, "Oh my days." :)
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Welt During his lifetime Welt had witnessed a lot and many tragedies. Despite his knowledge and understanding of the consequences of his actions, he couldn’t suppress his urges when it came to you. Welt always made sure to keep a watchful eye over you, safeguarding you from any troubles. He would usually spend a lot of his time watching over you and observing any anomalous behavior from you. 
One sudden day he started noticing you developing odd behaviors and your daily schedule becoming a trouble. You also started to develop a habit of dissociating away from your peers, he was no exception. This unusual behavior disturbs him because it meant he can’t keep a close eye on you. 
Now I feel how he’ll handle this can go two ways: He seeks immediate professional help for you OR tries to handle this situation himself. The reason why Welt would try to handle this situation himself is to prevent you from becoming self-aware. To Welt, becoming self-aware poses a challenge to him as you’re more aware and knowledgeable of your surroundings and who is around you. He would do everything in his power to leave you clueless and thoughtless towards your surroundings so you don’t become aware of any manipulation he inflicted on you in the past.
Manipulation such as convincing you to stay with the Astral Express by his side 24/7. Welt truly cares about you and needs to see you heal. To him you’re the light in the room full of darkness in his heart. Every time you smile, laugh even when you’re clumsy or mess up he can’t help but smile, feeling relaxed near your presence. Even if you're not the brightest person you still light and warm up his heart. 
“Are you alright?” he asks, raising a brow as the bottom of his cane taps the floor behind you. Deep down he knows the answer and urges you to tell him the truth, finding comfort in his presence like he does in yours. 
“I’m alright,” you intensity waiver him away.
Unfazed by your response, he persisted, “You really don’t need to pretend, around me.”
If you do manage to admit and confess your feelings he would categorize it as depression. Welt will immediately try and cheer you up, letting March, Dang Heng and Stelle; his trusted companions around you. He will try every day to lift your spirits even letting you choose where to go for the next trailblazing expeditions. 
Welt attempts to educate himself more on the topic of depression, so he can create a safe environment for you. Although he might not exactly provide professional help he will solve it ethically.
Lol I can't see Welt keeping you captive. He would probably pressure you or convince you to join the Astral Express so he can keep a close eye on you. He's very careful when being possessive over you. Himeko and Dan Heng can catch on quickly so he would try to make you fall in love with him.
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Jing Yuan Jing Yuan, a high achieving General, a man who no one can hate personally, aged over 600 years and has experience of yearning over the dead and betrayals. As he watched you drift into the endless abyss of sadness he could not help but share in your sorrow. All he truly wanted for you was your happiness and safety, including your undying love and attention. 
Yet this draining illness simply wouldn’t allow that for you. Jing Yuan is a man who is willing to go to extreme lengths in pursuit of your happiness which only he should be the one serving. Yet under one condition, he’s willing to do things that go against your happiness just so he can satisfy his impulsive desires. 
“I love you so so much. Please don’t be sad,” he murmured softly into your eyes, biting down gently on the top of your ears, which sent shivers down your body in a sensual way. He twirls the end of your hair with his fingers holding you against his embrace.
You continue to stare out into the distance, while his fingers play with the ends of your hair.
“If there’s anything you must need…. Please,” he implored in your ears from behind. The warm breath on your neck, “Tell me. I care about you and you know that.” his arms wrap around your waist telling you you’re all for him alone, all while he nuzzles his head against your shoulders. His white fluffy strands of hair tickle up against your cheekbone. 
If you ever found yourself in his custody and requested freedom, he would by all means exploit rapid, white little lies. 
"Recently, there have been reports of numerous mara-struck soldiers on the loose. 36 tragedies have resulted from these mara strikes," he warns, emphasizing the fake danger outside. "Luofu might need to go into lockdown, so it's safest for you to stay here with me."
He soon begins to take into account your condition growing rapidly worse. Your depression started to overtake your everyday life. That’s when he knew this was severe. Although sometimes delusional, he does take into account his mistakes. 
“I arranged us a date, a vacation even! It’s been many years since I left Luofu for anything other than urgent matters.”
You smiled and nodded profusely in agreement. This smile and small action deluges his heart with warm sweet love <3 How his heart jumps and flutters like a butterfly because of you. If you don’t get any better he will hire and get you an appointment with the best psychologist. 
Jing Yuan just wants the best for you wholeheartedly and truly. If he does kidnap and detain you, it’s because of his impulsive actions to keep you for himself. There will be no other 4th betrayal or the 4th person to pay the price. 
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Blade Blade’s cold demeanor and sharp eyes were enough to sway anyone away; he never believed himself capable of love or being a good partner in general. Some people in this cosmos were simply not cut out to be in a relationship, or so he believed since his journey began with the thought of death lingering in his mind. 
Yingxing would have been a more suitable man in a relationship, but Blade? He doubts on the idea of love and interest. Yet, when he laid eyes on you he couldn’t ignore the strange stinging of an electric sensation in his heart. He wanted to delve deeper into this unusual sensation he was feeling. Although he knew he could never truly reveal himself.
Who wouldn’t recognize a man whose bounty is worth 8.13 billion credits? At least he has a good credit score unlike me (╥﹏╥) Blade slowly started by stalking you, falling deeper into the spiral of love and obsession. He knew with his records you could never reciprocate his feelings.
He restored to drastic measures, keeping you in his custody. It’s difficult to say he’ll treat you top-notch. Being under his care seemed more like a physiological experiment. Providing you with basic needs while expecting obedience, as if conducting an experiment. 
Blade never once will lay a hand on you, raise his voice at you, only expressing annoyance through small grunts and groans. However, the isolation drove you quickly to the brink of insanity. Every day, waking up to a meal, lack of interaction; he would simply stare down at you as you chew on the food he provided. You even lack social interaction with your kidnapper. The daily routine went on, like a trap in an asylum. 
His cold gaze lingered on you, studying your every move, all while silently making mental notes of your behavior. If you did fall into depression he wouldn’t recognize it immediately, attributing it to your natural state or how you express disappointment.
Every tear shed or harsh remark towards him is met with silent observation, perceiving it as a natural reaction. Only when severe signs startsd occurring; refusing to eat or neglecting basic hygiene, did Blade acknowledge something was amiss.
He attempts to coax you with better-tasting meals, even dessert. If you die from starvation how else will he get the same sensation he feels when around you? This strange sensation in his heart is much more desirable than death.
“Eat it, you mustn’t starve yourself,” he says nonchalantly, placing a bowl of Mapo Tofu and a small portion of rice before you.
“Just leave me alone.”
“Eat it.”
“No.”
Blade shot you a deadly glare, his intimidation palpable, urging you to reluctantly pick up the chopstick. Blade’s method or strange way of love worsens your condition. I think with Blade you probably wouldn’t relieve yourself from the chains of depression. Yet I also do believe Blade will try to understand your mental state yet fail.
If Blade were to love; he would start by, placing a hand on your shoulders and gently massaging your shoulder blade as you ate. The thought of Blade saying “I love You,” seems inconceivable, but he’d probably say it underneath his breath.
“Do now dwell in longingness for too long,” he muttered against your ears, perhaps the most motivational phrase he said to you since the decline in your mental state began. Although he won’t admit upfront he loves and feels affection toward you, his demeanor is more relaxed around you and his sharp intense eyes soften at your presence. 
How to help a depressed person 101: The reader is Blade trying to figure out what’s causing you this and how to help you. 
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Aventurine From the moment Aventurine first laid eyes on you, he knew exactly what he wanted for the rest of his life. He had always felt most alive when gambling at high stakes, but being near you brought a sensation even more profound; a mix of obsession and love washed over him. 
When you begin to struggle with depression, Aventurine tries everything to lift up your spirits by lavishing you with extravagant gifts, hoping they would bring you happiness. Yet the joy was only ephemeral and wasn’t what he truly desired. What he craved was not only your happiness but also your love and affection.
He couldn’t bring it into words but, your presence was like an addictive drug he constantly craved for. His dopamine goes crazy near you, almost exploding his brain. There was something about you that he yearned to possess and preserve for himself.
“Sweetheart, I brought you this exclusive necklace,” he announced from behind, presenting the box to you.
Your face lights up only momentarily at each lavish gift presented to you, but as gifts keep coming, their extravagance holds little value. Aventurine could only find himself lost. What could he do now since he can’t seem to please you any further with his riches?
To him, his identity revolves around his wealth and luck, without the appeal towards money, he feared that he held no more value in your life. He wished you found solace in him as he did towards you.
“Is something the matter?” he asked anxiously, feeling you slip away further despite all his efforts. You’re his safe haven but he can’t fathom why he’s not your after all of his efforts. 
“I’m fine,” a transparent white lie escapes your lips.
“That’s a blatant lie,” he frowned, wrapping his right arm around your waist and pulling you in closer to him while on the bed. “Please, tell me the truth. I’ll buy you anything you want,” he continues coaxing you with the power of money.
“I’m okay,” you continue to refuse despite his effort.
Aventurine hesitates to pressure you any further, fearing that you’ll start to withdraw from him completely. He would insist, forcing you into therapy, though each session came with a price because nothing in this universe is free.
With Aventurine’s dirty money he coaxes the therapist to make every session involve him in some way while actually helping you. With the power of money, the therapist starts to manipulate you into seeking comfort, and attention from Aventurine. Every session ended with something about Aventurine, so he can linger in your thoughts.
Slowly, you began to heal, finding yourself drawn to Aventurine's presence. He welcomed this, craving pleasure since he- himself is constantly drawn to you every second.
"How are you feeling?" he asked gently, his arm draped around you as you both lounged on plush casino's cushion.
"Better," you replied softly.
He smiled at your response, knowing it was what he wanted to hear. Finally, he was becoming your safe place, just as he had always hoped.
His hand gently massaged your back, drawing you closer until your lips were almost touching.
"Is that so?" he grinned, closing the gap with a tender kiss, savoring the sweetness of the moment. As he pulled back, staring at your bashfulness, he brushed your hair behind your ear and whispered, "If I win this, I'll buy you everything you desire."
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P.S: I'm going to sleep after this but idk much about Welt despite playing hi3 since near release date. I also like keep character in character but Yandere or any NSFW +18 works are probably gonna be ooc.
Sorry this took so long I'm Trying to get my life back together :(
Mental Health
I take mental health seriously since I’m studying to become an expert in the medical field for mental health! If you’re ever in need of help please ask a trusted adult or seek help right away before it becomes worse! Just know mental health doesn’t make you a bad person but rather you’re suffering and depression is also an illness. Everyone is allowed treatment no matter what.
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dalamjisung · 1 month
Text
A muted shade of green ✧ Chapter 2: He's not yours to keep
genre: more angst than fluff, but I swear fluff is coming up next!
word count: 5562
pairing: reader x spencer reid
description: you are trying to make sense of all this mess, but it's time to learn that, sometimes, things are just messy and chaotic and you have to learn to look for the silver linings.
a muted shade of green masterlist
previous chapter // next chapter
author's note: I am absolutely over the moon with the response I've gotten on this series and I'm really thankful for all the love and support <3 if you want to join the taglist for this series, please let me know in the comments!
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You don’t usually dream. 
Well, actually, if you tell Spencer that, he will say that you’re wrong– you do dream, you just don’t remember it. It’s common, not really recalling the scenes your brain conjure, Spencer would say; it can be due to a series of factors including high levels of stress and poor sleep. He would then tell you to stay home for a day, read a good book, and drink one of his fancy teas Penelope got for him a long time ago. 
But the thing is, Spencer can’t really tell you any of it. 
Not when you seem to be avoiding him even inside his own home. 
It starts after you wake up still in his armchair, feeling exhausted and disgustingly sticky, you finally have a couple of moments to yourself. Spencer is still sleeping, and you’re actually surprised to see him stretched out on the couch– his tie is throw on his coffee table, the purple colour suddenly too bright in the dim apartment, but otherwise, still wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday. You don’t understand why he didn’t change into pyjamas, but then again, you don’t understand much of anything right now. 
So you go through the facts. 
One by one, you list them in your mind– and little by little it dawns on you just how bad this really is. It’s hard, conceptualising that this is reality; that you really do have a psychopath targeting you. It’s the kind of thing that you only saw in those TV shows you loved to binge on late night, the kind of thing you read on the newspaper, happening to other people, but never really you. Except, it is happening to you, and you are not sure what to do next. Do you just sit and wait for her to make a move? Do you continue to live your life normally? How? How are you supposed to ignore the fact that a, as Agent Hotchner had described her, ‘prolific serial killer’ might know who are?
“Oh my god,” You whisper to yourself, head falling in your hands. The watch on your wrist, an old, analogue thing your mom had given you before you left New York, is pointing to a time you would never have been awake before. 5:23 in the morning. The sun is not even up yet and you have hours before you have to open the store, but then again, you have to clean the mess that was left behind due to your rushed departure from it. You wince, disgusted at the thought of having to clean old vomit from the floor, and disgusted with the bitter taste it left behind. Right now, you are a shell of a human being and you need to get yourself back together. 
You follow a familiar routine of recovery. It’s something you’ve done before and something you will surely have to do again, and it all starts with a simple list. 
Firstly, you need to get up. You need to stretch your legs, throw them to the side, and stand. You need to walk, remind your self that you can still make your own path even if it’s only to the bathroom down the hall. 
Then, you need to brush your teeth. The bitter taste stuck to your mouth makes you wince with memories that you want to bury. 
Showering would be your third step, but this is not your home. This is not your space, and these are not your things. 
A pettier side of you, one that is bothered and angry and irritated in a superficial level, wants to march back out to the living room, as loudly as you can, and shake Spencer away. You want to wake him up at the crack of dawn and make him share your torment, because in some level, even if you try to push against it, you blame him. Deep inside, you know that there is a big difference between the two– between blaming him and it being his fault. One is purposeful, conscious; it’s a decision you take and lay on his head. If you blame him, you commit yourself to hate him. The latter, however, is a fact. It’s irrefutable and immutable as the fact that you need air to live. It is his fault, but it was not his goal. 
“He didn’t mean it, but it’s still his fault,” You whisper to yourself, pushing yourself off the sink to try and figure out his shower. It is his house, that’s a fact. But you also deserve a nice, warm shower, and that is another fact. He pushed you to come stay with him, so you need to also push yourself to feel comfortable in this space that feels so foreign to your senses. “He didn’t mean it, but it’s still his fault.”
The words become your mantra. He didn’t mean it, but it’s still his fault. Somewhere in you, you know you have what it takes to forgive, but you just don’t have what it’s needed to forget. By repeating those words, you allow your brain to slowly process this situation as what it is– something that happened because of him, but not by him. As much as you want someone to blame, someone to scream at, Spencer Reid just isn’t that person. 
It takes you a moment to realise you don’t really have a towel or any of your products here, and using Spencer’s shampoo just feels… odd. Like an invasion of his space almost. “Oh thank god for you, Spencer,” You sighed, happy to see the pairing of shampoo and conditioner sitting perfectly on the corner. His hair had been one of the first things you noticed about him, all chestnut and shaggy and longish, but you are aware that not every man knows the basic of self-care. There is something about the way his smell takes over the bathroom, floating with the evaporation of the warm water hitting your skin, makes you smile. You feel closer to Spencer than you’ve ever been, and that is when your sense of danger hits. Your heart starts speeding, and your breathing is suddenly really shallow, and you’re trying to come out of the shower, to breathe in cold air, but all you get is humid mist and you can’t breathe, you can’t breathe at all, you can’t–
“Spencer!” You gasp, eyes wide in desperation once your legs feel like they might just give out. Scrambling to hold yourself up, your hands knock over some things in the counter, making more noise on top of the running shower. “SPENCER!” 
“What? What? What– oh my god,” The door slams against the wall and back, almost hitting him on the side when he crouched down next to your naked, curled up body. It’s quite unnatural for you to witness, him jumping into action so fast, like he is trained to make these decisions in a split second. But then you remember that he actually is trained to make these quick choices– like grabbing the towel before anything else, covering you without a single quip about your nakedness; like sitting you up and putting your back against the wall; like turning off the shower and sitting back down right next to you, breathing deeply and loudly. It’s unconscious, how you let your breathing fall in line with his, and it takes a moment to realise he’s doing this on purpose. “Y/N, are you okay?” 
“No,” You whisper, shaking from either the cold or the nerves or both. There are goosebumps all over your legs, the towel not covering you much from the top of your thighs down. “Spencer, I’m not okay. I’m… Until yesterday, you were just the adorable guy who shared my love for books. Y-You’d come into the store smiling and we’d talk and talk and– and now I have a serial killer possibly tracking me. How am I supposed to be okay? I’m so scared… oh god, I’m so scared, Spencer…” The one thing you are proud, amidst your utter embarrassment, is that you are not crying anymore. You still sound a bit rough, throat tired and hurting, and there is no energy left in you and he can hear that, you know he can, because when your voice echoes in the silent bathroom, kicking from wall to wall, you hear it too– the exhaustion and the numbness and the emptiness left behind. 
“I-I’m still that guy,” He stutters, head falling down in shame but voice still twinged with something resembling hope. “I love books. I love talking to you about books, I love going to your store first thing in the morning. I’m still this guy, I just… I just happen to work for the FBI.”
“Yeah, but I… I think that after having my life turned upside down because of a serial killer who has a crush on you, I’m just not that same girl.”
That is the last time you talk to him that day.
—————————————
Actually, that was the last time you talked to him that entire week. 
After he dropped you at the store that day and you were forced to face the embarrassing remnants of your lowest moment in life, moping old vomit from the floor, that feeling of turmoil in your chest died down. It settled. And it hardened. 
He tried making conversation on the walk back to his, but you’re clearly not up for it, so his voice slowed down, getting lower and lower, until it stopped altogether. This time, you shower before bed and make a beeline to the armchair again, letting Spencer’s begs and pleas for you to sleep on the bed fall in deft ears.
For five days, you two don’t talk. 
It’s a dance of chaos, how you step around each other at the apartment, and seeing him biting his words back or catching a glimpse of the bags under his eyes makes you feel guilty; of course it does. But you know that you can’t help him right now. Even if you were to forgive him, to force your mercy onto the situation, it wouldn’t be genuine. It would give him a false sense of relief while you’d forever be uncomfortable next to him, and you don’t want that. You don’t want to feel on edge next to Spencer, you don’t want to feel nauseous and scared when you’re with him. You want to talk about books and coffee and favourite places to order take out from. Instead, all you get to do is talk about her.
It would be a lie to say you don’t feel slightly jealous with the way that his mind seems to be so wrapped around Cat Adams. The imposed talking ban is hard on you both, that much you know, but the more Spencer let it happen, the more he let it stretch out and continue, the more you feel like maybe he doesn’t care that much. Maybe what is hard for him is the awkward tension trapped in his own apartment, rather than the pain of seeing each other so close yet not being able to laugh like you used to. And you know– you know how ridiculous your thought are, how childish you’re acting, but you can’t really blame yourself for being so on edge lately, not when your emotions are so zip and zapping through your body like thunder and lightening. 
There are exceptions, though. In this case three exceptions, three moments in a day in which he brakes the ban, and you, for once, allow yourself some weakness. 
“Good morning,” Is moment one. He says that every day, when he blinks himself awake on the couch. Ever since you’ve been there, a total of six days now, Spencer has slept on the couch, right next to the armchair you’ve claimed as your own. For these, you meet his eyes and nod, as if saying same to you.
Breakfast is quiet. He makes coffee and you make eggs, because despite you being there under forced circumstances, you are not going to be ungrateful and so you pay him back by getting groceries and cooking most meals. Which leads you to exception number two– the moment when he drops you at the bookstore.
You two walk there at 8 and he’s gone by 8:07, giving you enough time to mumble a “Be safe,” and give him his lunch for the day. He tried telling you that you didn’t have to cook for him, but you don’t really listen. As pathetic as it seems, this is the one way you’ve found to keep what you two had before, alive. 
The third exception is the one that truly breaks your heart, again and again. It’s when he gets home, and he looks exhausted, and his hands fidget with the files he holds close to his chest. You are the first thing he looks for, and you almost melt at the way his shoulders visibly relax when he spots you– always ready for bed, always in the armchair. He stopped trying to come get you at the bookstore at night once you’ve agreed to let the officers walk you home. The spare key he added to your keychain should hold a bigger meaning than it does, though it feels like it does hold a bigger weight. A means to an end, you tell yourself every time you unlock his front door. This is just a means to an end. “Thank you,” he will then say, before he even moves to the kitchen to see whatever it was on the plate you had made and set in the microwave for him. “And good night.” By then, you’re already semi-asleep and you don’t really say anything. 
You never thought you would miss these forbidden exceptions when they’re gone. 
You know that travel is a big part of Spencer’s job, but with all that is going on, you never really considered the fact that he might need to leave for a few days. At least not until he calls you, right before you lock the store. The irregularity of it all has you scrambling to pick it up. “Spencer?” You barely whisper, voice cracking in half as little by little, you freeze up. The sensation is like ice running through your veins, burning it’s way to your heart until it makes it stop. “Spencer? Are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” He quickly answers, voice rushed in a way that makes you relax. He always talks fast and you find it incredibly endearing, even during these times apart. “I’m okay, it’s okay. I’m calling because we got a case.”
“Uh, okay?”
“Y/N, that means they need us in Ohio. Today.” He seems almost hesitant to tell you he needs to leave the state. 
And you are as hesitant to accept it. “Oh,” You mumble, suddenly needing to making sure the officer assigned to you is still outside and ready to go. “Okay. Do… Do you need clothes or something?” 
Spencer’s chuckle almost makes it all okay. Almost. “No, thank you. I just��� I want you to be comfortable, okay? Feel free to sleep in my bed and do anything you want to do, I don’t mind! Feel at home! Just… be comfortable.” 
For a second you nod, forgetting he can’t see you right now. “Okay. Thank you.” 
“And Y/N?”
“Yeah?” You started biting your nails when you were twelve and middle school was kicking your ass. To this day, right now, you still bite them when you’re nervous. 
“It’s good hearing your voice.” 
Going home and knowing he won’t be there is not as comforting as you thought it could be. The two of you are not speaking and the constant walking on egg shells does get tiring, so you try to rationalise this as something that is just not that bad. Maybe Spencer going on his mysterious trips is not that bad anymore. Before, your curiosity was your downfall– you worried he had gotten sick or worse. However, you don’t think knowing the truth is much better. The nature of his job is incredibly dangerous, and you don’t even know much about it. Now, you still worry, that much hasn’t changed. What has changed, though, is that getting sick would be considered lucky. Right now, you worried about the ‘or worse’. 
Your mom’s voice fills the empty space for a while. She texted you a couple of days ago and you just now got around to calling. “Sweetheart, how do we switch to video again? I want to see your face.” Alarm bells sound off in your mind and you immediately shut down the idea. “Sorry mom, I can’t right now. I’ll video call you tomorrow, okay? I’m cooking dinner right now.” Her worry is that of a mother, comforting like a blanket and familiar like a home. It is not, though, the worry you want. 
For obvious reasons, you don’t tell her what’s going on, much rather preferring to tell her about the mundane things that keep you going. “And I sold out of the book!” You say, a short-lived excitement running through you. “It’s quite exciting, mom– since I opened the shop I have never sold out of anything! This is a first!”
“That’s amazing, sweetie!” She says, and you can’t help but wonder how Spencer would’ve reacted to the news if he was there. It’s only then that you realise you’re halfway through making him a plate for when he comes home, except he won’t be back until the case is complete and you gulp, too aware of the common noises you hear around you. 
This is when you realise how much you miss you Spencer. And how much, even if unconsciously, he makes you feel comfortable and safe. You thought it was the apartment, but now, by yourself, laying on the armchair yet again, you feel vulnerable and exposed. Footsteps can be heard from time to time, neighbours getting home or leaving for the night, and every time, without a fault, you hold your breath and wait. Maybe the door will open and she will be there, or maybe it will be another delivery. God, it could be anything– a letter, flowers, another box. Knowing that Cat Adams had such easy access to Spencer’s apartment is enough to get you up and running to his room. 
Green. The walls are green, muted and cozy, and you smile even when your eyes sting with tears. There is a hole in your heart right now and it’s Spencer shaped. “God,” You groan, rubbing your tears clean so aggressively that it hurts. “When did things get so fucked up?” 
There’s no real answer to that, and you if you think any longer about this, your brain might just implode. For now, all you need is to sleep, but that won’t happen for a while; not with the way your heart speeds up at every crackle coming from his old, metal heather. Still, the chill air of Autumn seeps in through the walls, and you shiver. I want you to be comfortable, Spencer had said before leaving, and you might be crossing some boundaries right now, but you need him close to feel comfortable. You might not be able to get him, but the next best thing you have right now is one of his sweaters, and you have no qualms about opening his wardrobe and grabbing the first thing you find. Ironically enough, it’s an FBI Academy hoodie, though you can’t really imagine Spencer and all his formal glory in a hoodie. You put it on, nonetheless, shutting the door with your foot and just as you turn around, your eyes catch sight of something. Something big, and beige, and bone chilling. 
The box. 
In the heat of the moment, you simply thought he had throw it away. Hell, it would’ve made sense to throw it away! What the fuck was that box doing there…? With a shaky breath, you open the wardrobe door again, hoping, praying, that you were actually hallucinating and that what you saw was nothing but a shoe box or a bag. “God, please, be a bag, be a bag…” Safe to say, your words are in vain. “Fuck, Spencer, what is wrong with you?”
You’re shaking when you pull the box out of its hiding place, breathing shallow and fast. Reason escapes you as you quickly open it, not worried about how it was or even about putting it back in place; if it was up to you, this box would’ve been gone a long time ago. Clearly, it had not been up to you. “Oh my god, I’m going to be sick.” 
Expectations are a tricky thing to deal with. When it comes to your life, you never expected anything big. You know your limitation better than anyone and the largest you’ve dreamt before was the store. You didn’t expect an FBI agent. You didn’t expect a serial killer. And you certainly didn’t expect a box full of sex toys. “What the…” You don’t want to touch them, not with your bare hands, but it looks like there are tens of toys in there, varying in shapes and sizes and colours. It makes you wonder… last he told you, her games are psychological and manipulative. From what you are seeing, though, this is incredibly physical. This is about touch and intimacy and… fuck. This is about connection. You don’t have to be a profiler to know that, not when you are so secretive about your own toys, hidden in the back of your besides drawer away from unwanted eyes. It’s a private thing, and only people you trusted, people you let into your life, knew about them. 
Before you know what you’re doing, you rush to find your phone. It’s somewhere in the house, and you need to find it, you need to call him. “Pick up,” You whisper when you finally find it in the living room, under your favourite blanket on the chair. Even your fingers are shaking, vision a bit blurred from the adrenaline rushing through you– you feel like you’re in danger, and you don’t know what to do. “Spence, pick up, pick up, please pick up–“
“Hello?” You almost cry when you hear his raspy voice on the other side. It doesn’t make you feel any better to think that you might just have woken him up.
“Spencer,” You whine, embarrass with how needy you sound. The nice officer that brought you home is standing outside the door, and you could’ve gone to him– could’ve opened the door, asked him to stay inside, talk to him a little. Or you could’ve called Penelope. She had given you her number with promises that more often then not, she stayed behind to work from the BAU office. There is no place safer than my office, she had promised you, but how do you tell her that the problem is not your environment, it’s not where you are or what you’re doing… how do you tell her that the problem is you? She might not understand it so you don’t even dare try to explain it. You don’t dare to give her and the team this part of yourself too and you shut your mouth with a firm hand over your lips. 
Memories of a life you left behind flash behind your eyes, and you whimper, hugging your knees to your chest while you hear him desperately calling for you. As far as you can, you kick that godforsaken box away from you. “Y/N?! Y/N, say something, please! Are you okay? Y/N!”
“I’m here,” You whisper, pushing your hair away from your face. “I’m here.’ 
“What’s going on?” 
“Spencer, I–” A moment of regret and hesitation makes you pause. What can he even do all the way from Ohio? “I want to go home.” 
You’re not his priority. 
You’ll never be his priority. 
There is no point to this.
“…did something happen?” This is the Spencer you know– voice soft and guarded– and for a second it feels like you two are getting to know each other all over again. “Did officer Kaper make you uncomfortable? I’ll ask for a change of guard, I’ll–“
“N-No,” You cut him off with a shaky exhale. Your head falls on your free hand, finger tangled with your messy hair, and you tug on it. Sharply, the tingly pain on your scalp grounds you for a second, brings you back to this situation you created. “No, Spence, no no no, I just want to go home, I need to go home, I–“ 
“Y/N, breathe,” He coaches you as gently as he can, voice stable and strong, everything you seem to be lacking. “You’re going to set yourself off in a panic again if you don’t breathe. You’re safe in my apartment, okay? I know it’s not the same as being home, I know, but you’re safe there!”
“You’re not here, Spence!” 
There is a moment of silence for both of you. “You’re not here and you didn’t throw that fucking box away,” You whisper, keeping the moment something in between just the two of you. It’s enough that you are falling apart like this in front of Spencer, you don’t need officer Kaper bursting in the door to witness this too.
“You found the box,” He sighs. This is the first time you notice just how tired he sounds.
“I found the box,” You confirm, sniffling in a stubborn attempt to not start crying all over again. 
“It’s evidence. I can’t throw it away, Y/N.”
“Why is it here?”
“I’ve been working on the case on my free time and it just made sense to keep it at home…” 
“Spence, I want to go home. I don’t feel safe,” You admit, shaking your head. “I don’t feel safe here when you’re not here, Spence, I want to go home.” 
“I thought you hated me.”
“Spencer…” He has a point, though, and you know it. This is the first time you two speak in days, the first time you experience this type of comfort again, but it’s still not enough. He’s still not here, next to you, watching over you. He’s still not with you. “Spencer, I’m sorry.” 
“Silly girl, why are you apologising?” He asks, chuckling on the other side and you can picture him– you can see him shaking his head, hair falling around his pretty face like a perfect picture frame when his eyes, pure honey with specks of green, search for yours. Yeah… you can imagine it to perfection, almost like you are the one with eidetic memory. “This is all my fault. And I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you, Y/N and I’m trying to protect you, so I need you to stay there, okay? I need you to stay in my apartment, please.” 
You don’t know what to tell him. Your eyes wander around the room, looking at all the details he left behind without even noticing. There is a copy of Dostoevsky on the bed side table. I hate Russian literature, you remember telling him once. He was in the shop, bringing you coffee, when you caught a glimpse of a book you certainly didn’t sell him. And I’m appalled you’ve been buying books somewhere else. The way he laughed then, like his biggest problem in the world was explaining to you that this had been a gift from a friend and that he would never betray your trust like this. What do you hate so much about it?, he had asked, leaning over the counter and into you, eager to debate this topic he loved so much. I hate that it’s all about suffering. Even the moments of realisation and self-improvement, they are all through suffering and misery. And of course he had a retort to that, fingers twitching with his enthusiasm. But it’s contextual, you see! Those were written in time of civil unrest and political chaos, and it makes sense to have characters and plot lines that revolve around suffering when that is all you know from the world around you. To this day, your answer paralyses you. I’m a believer in silver linings and happy endings. And not because I’m naive or ignorant, but because the world around me has made me believe that there must be something better out there. Isn’t that nicer?
“Y/N, please tell me you’ll stay there, I need you to stay there.” 
His words almost escape you, but you catch them in the very last minute. It gives you a glimpse into a side of him he has yet to show you, and it absolutely shatters your heart in bits. I need you to stay there, he had said. Not you need to stay there, but I need you to stay there. Suddenly, you realise that this– all of this, the relocation, the involvement of the FBI, the dropping off and picking up– is not just for you. 
“I’ll stay here,” Whispering with him like this helps. “I’ll stay. I’m sorry I woke you up.” 
“Don’t be. I’m happy you called.” 
“I’ll let you go back to sleep, but Spence?” 
“Yeah?”
“Be safe. I need you back here.”
“I’ll be home in no time.” 
For a second, you trust him. You trust everything will be okay, that you can make everything okay until he gets back, and then you’ll pass the responsibility onto him. For a second, you trust him, but you also trust yourself. 
Everything will be okay. 
Everything will be okay. 
Everything will be okay. 
You fall asleep like this; wearing his hoodie and hugging your phone, nose buried on his pillow in hopes to dream of him. The sun wakes you up, and there are birds chirping at your window. Despite the heaviness you feel in you and dooming headache you know will settle soon, the romantic in you believes that today will be a good day. That today will be an okay day.
“Miss Y/L/N? It’s officer Kaper.” 
The knock doesn’t scare you anymore. On days one through three it had you jumping on air, heart about to stop from how fast it was beating. Days four and five were easier, less scary and more anxious, waiting for the punctual 9AM knock. From day six onwards, it was a welcome start to your day, knowing that someone is looking after you. 
You check the fisheye like Spencer told you to, and then you open the door only when you recognise the face on the other side. “Good morning, Officer,” You smile, nodding at him a bit stiffly. The two of you had been formally introduced by JJ, but it didn’t make this any less awkward for you. “Would you like some coffee?” 
“Sure,” He nods, smiling as he comes inside with his usual stack of mail. Everyday, without fail, someone picks up your mail and brings it to Officer Kaper. “Here’s your mail for the day, ma’am.” 
“How was the night shift?” It’s almost like a scripted conversation, these back and forth questions you throw at each other, and you’re finding that you hate this. You hate the stiff conversations and the self-imposed bans. But this is day two, and in just more two days, Spencer would be home. And you would talk to him, just like you used to before, just like you did over the phone. Nothing will change; you’re not going home any time soon and Cat Adams isn’t going to just magically disappear. It’s time to accept it and learn how to live with it, as hard as that sounds. 
Sifting through your mail has to be your favourite part of the day. It’s normal, slightly boring, and a peek into the routine you used to have and love. No one ever sends you letters, so it’s just bills. “Water, electricity, marketing, marketing,” The coffee is brewing in the background and Officer Kaper is telling you about his daughter. She’s a tiny girl, just two and very, very shy, but apparently, she loves stories. “I might have a book for her,” You get distracted from the letters for a second, smiling at the kind officer. “I’ll bring it to you later tonight!” 
When you look back again, it’s the one on top. 
The envelope is white, like any other letter, and it has no thing in the back but your name and address scribbled in red, a big heart right next to it. “Uh, Officer, this is… this is weird.” You’ve been instructed to let someone know if you received anything unlabelled or unexpected. This letter is certainly unexpected. “It has no return address.” 
“May I open it?” He asks and you nod. He opens it with a knife, pulling a small piece of paper inside. “Okay, it seems like a normal letter. There is no signature of any kind.”
“What does it say?” You’re nervous now, walking around Officer Kaper to read over his shoulder. “Oh my god.” 
“Does this mean anything to you?” 
Nodding, you’re dialling Spencer’s number already. “It means I’m fucked.” 
On the table, laid a message you’d never forget.
He’s not yours to keep. 
---------------------------------------
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266 notes · View notes
nyctoaerah · 5 months
Note
TWTWTWTWTWTW: GORE TWTWTWTWTW
Hi, I love the Yandere Gojo series! I'd like to make a request. My request: Yandere Gojo gives his non-sorcerer lover the worst punishment he's ever seen in his life because she keeps trying to run away… he makes her unable to move or run again. either amputation or broken bones. But in the end, he regrets it very much.
⋆♱⋆REMINISCENT
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⋆♱⋆SYPNOSIS: Satoru loves Suguru deeply and he misses the latter so much, so how could he let go off you? How could he let a pretty little thing like you slip through his fingers when you’re literally just like suguru?
⋆♱⋆WARNINGS: Yandere (duh) bone breaking, Surgery stuff, Satoru himself is already a warning, Satoru has Capgras delusion disorder, Both Reader and Satoru ended up having shared psychosis disorder. Satosugu.
⋆♱⋆PAIRINGS: Yandere! Gojo Satoru x Fem! Non-sorcerer reader. Satosugu.
⋆♱⋆NOTE: okokok, i know that you didn’t requested satosugu anon, but there’s a reason why there’s satosugu in here, and it’s important in the plot. Hope you understand<3. Broken bones is already a bad punishment, but i’ll add a twist on it;) Hearts and Reblogs are greatly appreciated<3. Please do support me in wattpad and quotev too<3 i suck at doing angst, sooo.... Idk.. might make a part 2 though.
MASTERLIST
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HE WASN’T THE MAN that you once knew, no longer the gentle soul who showered you with affection. The bond you shared over four years had been pure, filled with love and warmth, until that cursed night , Twenty fourth of December in 2017.
Satoru’s mental state appeared to deteriorate drastically ever since that day. The once warm and affectionate gaze he used to cast on you had now transformed into a cold and distant stare, devoid of any tender emotions.   
Sometimes he would blame non-sorcerers like yourself too, grumbling things under his breath like
“You non-sorcerers are the reason why suguru went spiraling”
You didn’t grasp the true meaning of this statement until you did a little digging into Satoru’s past. It was then that you realized you had been living in a state of blissful ignorance.
And after learning about his troubles, instead of scolding him for his erratic behavior and pushing him away, you chose to approach him with kindness and understanding—You felt bad, for you would mostly just yell at him for acting like that, when you didn’t knew the reason why he was like that.
You made every effort to comfort him and show him that you cared deeply for him, to show him how apologetic you are for being so ignorant. However, at times, you also confronted him with harsh truths in order to bring him back to reality. 
In these moments of brutal honesty, Satoru took notice of the uncanny similarities between you and Suguru. From the way you conducted yourself to the gestures you made, tie your hair up, everything seemed to echo Suguru’s presence.
The way you spoke, moved, the way your lips would curl up into a smile, the way you would laugh and interacted with others all carried a trace of Suguru’s aura.
And your voice, fuck, the softness of your voice was reminiscent of the way suguru’s voice would soften whenever he talks to satoru.
Despite lacking a clear physical resemblance, the essence of Suguru seemed to radiate from you in all aspects of your actions.
And perhaps, it’s the way that you managed to make him see suguru in you was what made him so obsessed with you. He saw echoes of his beloved friend in your every gesture, your every word. Sometimes, in a strange mixture of jest and earnestness, he would playfully dub you and Suguru, as if to merge the two of you into one entity. Sometimes he would joke about you being suguru’s genderbend.
You found it peculiar yet endearing at first, dismissing it as a harmless quirk borne from grief, as you had always seen it as his coping mechanism. Little did you know, this oversight would prove to be your gravest mistake.
Despite the warning signs he showed, his redflags, you somehow chose to endure it all.
And that was your biggest mistake.
His once-charming gestures now morphed into suffocating constraints, possessiveness, obsessiveness. Slowly but surely, he isolated you from the outside world, severing even the most basic ties of communication with your own family.
Your past talking stage and lovers would be either found dead or missing without any trace. The friends who once stood by your side now regarded you with wary glances, distancing themselves.
Of course, you felt a deep sense of sadness, believing there was a flaw within yourself. And seeking solace and understanding, you opened up to Satoru, shedding tears as you shared the studf that you were facing in your life. In your moments of vulnerability, he offered you comfort, reassuring you that he was all you needed and that you should distance yourself from other individuals. He warned you that these individuals posed a threat to your well-being, emphasizing that their intentions were harmful—and insisting that he was the only one that you need.
As much as you wanted to believe Satoru and trust him completely, your innate intuition stopped you from fully buying into his facade. Because despite his convincing demeanor, a lingering sense of unease tugged at the back of your mind, suggesting that something wasn’t quite right.
Moreover, Satoru showed a tendency to involve himself in even the most mundane of tasks, such as brushing your hair, typically tasks you would manage alone. It seemed as though he viewed you as some kind of doll, someone he could manipulate and control at his own whim. He made sure to always be in close proximity to you, refusing to give you any moments of solitude. The only instances where he allowed you some privacy were during bathing or changing, and even then, he seemed reluctant to leave your side.
His obsession became so intense that he became insistent on your constant presence by his side, whether he was on a mission, teaching, or interacting with colleagues. His students and coworkers all recognized the unhealthy attachment, with Shoko and even Megumi expressing pity towards you for being caught in Satoru’s suffocating love. Despite the visible discomfort from all parties involved, Satoru remained unmoved, justifying his actions to keep you close at all times.
Even when Shoko attempted to reason with him and knock some sense into his fucked up mind, Satoru would manipulate the situation to shift blame onto them, for separating him with suguru—and that they’re the reason why he only has you now.
Nanami also tried to intervene by trying to convince the higher ups to arrange dangerous solo missions for Satoru in hopes of separating you two, but his stubbornness prevailed.
Maki and Nobara also attempted to intervene, even organizing girls’ nights as a means of providing you with a break from Satoru, yet their efforts were futile. 
Ultimately, the support from those aware of the situation—Nanami, Megumi, Nobara, Shoko, Maki, and others—proved futile in alleviating the troubling dynamic with Satoru. Despite their best intentions and efforts, your circumstances remained unchanged due to Satoru's unyielding obsession on keeping you with him.
Everyone knew how fucked up he was, but what can they do?
Satoru is the strongest after all.
Your parents weren’t even aware of your situation, as you were not allowed to talk or visit them.
One instance stands out in your memory, when you attempted to say that you want to speak with your parents, and he adamantly refused, claiming it was too perilous. Despite feeling frustrated at the time, you ultimately acquiesced to his wishes. The following day though, a horrifying discovery awaited you— the lifeless bodies of your parents. It was at this moment that you began connecting the dots, reflecting on the untimely death and murder of your previous partners, the gradual alienation of your friends, the look of pity his students and colleagues gives you, the persistent reasoning of people trying to separate you from satoru, his increasing control over your actions, and the coincidental deaths of those you sought to interact with. 
The realization dawned on you that all of these  events were orchestrated by Satoru himself, with the sole intention of keeping you entirely under his influence. And an overwhelming sense of fear crept into your chest, prompting you to devise a plan to escape while he was on a mission. 
----𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐄𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐄, 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆
Your entire body was engulfed in pain and weariness, each muscles contracting in pain, your breaths labored and shallow as if your lungs were about to give out—About to rupture, and a searing sensation in your chest as it tightens, heaving with each labored breath you took.
Your feet were raw and bloody, multiple cuts on it from the jagged edges of rocks you have stepped on, perspiration was all over your body in rivulets, and a dry, scratchy feeling in your throat due to lack of moisture and oxygen.
Everything burned, yet you persisted in moving forward, walking a fine line between imminent collapse and the urgent need to evade getting caught by Satoru—your boyfriend.
Rather than face capture, you were willing to risk death in your desperate attempt to escape.
You’d rather die trying to escape than live without trying to fight for your freedom.
The exhaustion consuming you mattered little, all that occupied your mind was the need to break free from his grasp and his control over you.
The passage of time was a blur, perhaps an hour had passed since you began running, your energy waning as your vision blurred with fatigue. 
Lost in the vast unknown surroundings, it seemed as though you were trapped in a never-ending loop. Uncertain of your location in Japan, the isolated landscape consisted only of a sprawling mansion, trees, and barren land devoid of any signs of human life. It felt as though you had been completely cut off from civilization.
As you continued running, tears streaming down your face, your mind were spinning and every hair on your body stood on end at the sound of his voice suddenly booming.
“Hm? Is that you that i see there, [Name]?”
You froze.
“What have I told you about leaving without my permission?”
The sound of Satoru's voice sent a shiver down your spine, freezing you in your tracks. Every fiber of your being screamed at you to keep moving, to escape his reach, but the fear of his wrath paralyzed you in place.
“S-satoru.. what are you doing here...?” 
You couldn’t comprehend how he had managed to be here when he was supposed to be on a mission. Your mind raced with confusion and disbelief.
“No, what are you doing here?” He asks, staring down at you coldly.
“Are you.. trying to run away?” He questioned you as he stepped closer to you.
Your breath hitched, throat constricting as you looked up at him with wide eyes, not knowing what to say.
“I-i..”
“I-i wasn’t i swear—”
You were left speechless as you were suddenly shoved you down, causing your head to hit the ground with a sickening thud. Blood trickled down your forehead as a cry of pain escaped your throat. 
His gaze bore down on you with a chilling intensity, sending shivers down your spine.
“You’re trying to leave me..”
“I trusted you,” he whispered shakily.
“How could you? I made sure to go back as soon as possible after my mission was finished so that you won’t be in danger... And now you’re running away and putting yourself in danger?”
Out of nowhere, his hand tightly gripped your throat, squeezing with such force that it became difficult to breathe, leading to a sensation of suffocation and a blurred vision.
“S-satoru n-nnh! L-let go!”
Struggling to break free, you frantically attempted to pry his fingers off your neck, letting out choked screams in the process. Your body thrashed around violently, desperately trying to fend him off by kicking in all directions. 
“You’re really just like suguru... always trying to resist..” 
“I trusted you,” he whispered unsteadily, his voice cracking.
“But what have you done?” he asked shakily.
His pupils trembled like leaves in a fierce wind, his entire frame quivering with an unsettling intensity. Those piercing sapphire eyes bore into you, sending shivers down your spine in the dim, eerie stillness of the forest.
“L-let go p-please satoru!” You begged.
“P-please. A-ahn.. let g-go, ‘Toru, please,”
“T-toru, haaah, i-i c-can’t breathe”
He seemed to pause at that when you called him “Toru.” 
And slowly, his grasp slackened, leaving you gasping for precious breath as your lungs desperately clawed for every molecule of air.
You coughed, again and again and again, and he just watched you.
When you finally managed to catch your breath, you turned to look at him, your face contorted in anger abd fear.
“Y-you’re crazy satoru,” Your voice emerged hoarse and jagged.
“You’re crazy, i swear” You rasped as you dragged yourself away from him, only for him to close the distance.
 “Crazy?” he repeated.
“Yes, crazy for love.” His fervor seemed to border on mania.
“Yes I’m Enamored, Suguru.” he professed with an almost unsettling zeal, his voice now carrying a hauntingly romantic lilt as though the torment he inflicted on you was an act of devotion.
Your breath hitched.
“What...?” your eyes widened.
“I’m not... Suguru...” Your voice faltered, delicate lips quivering. Pain pulsed through every fiber of your being, urging you to run away, yet how could you escape from one so consumed by his own distorted reality? Satoru appeared to be in a haze, his eyes vacant and unseeing—He was in his delusional state.
“Suguru, let’s go home..” Satoru mumbled.
You swallowed thickly. You were about to make a dumb move, but fuck, he really needed to snap out of it.
Gently, you cupped his face between trembling hands, hoping your tender touch might pierce the delirium and make him snap out of it.
“Please, ‘Toru, focus on the sound of my voice. It’s not suguru, it’s me”
But he remained ensnared in his twisted visions, oblivious to reality.
“...Satoru... ‘Toru, listen to me. I’m not suguru.”
“I’m not him. I’m [Name], your girlfriend...”
Again, and again and again, you tried to convince him that you’re not suguru.
“I’m [Name], the one that you met at the bakery that you liked so much... And i’m not suguru ”
You phrased it in different words.
And yet...
He was still lost in it.
“What are you saying suguru?”
Dread constricted your heart, each moment bringing you closer to the brink. To flee would surely send him into a frenzy but to stay would probably result in suffering. 
“Don’t say things like that... Suguru”
he whispered.
“I still haven’t forgave you for running away.” He uttered, and a pit formed on your stomach.
“I’m [Name], not suguru—Toru... Please, fuck, snap out of it”
He ignored you as he gently caressed your cheek before guiding your head towards his for a kiss. Your heart pounded as your lips met, the sharp sting of his teeth on yours making you whimper.
“S’toru... Stop...”
When he didn’t stop, you reacted by biting his tongue hard, making it bleed. Surprisingly, this did not deter him; instead, he released a soft moan of pleasure. 
“Oh fuck... You’re still the same as always, suguru.”
You gasped as he finally pulled away from the kiss.
“Sa-Satoru... What the fuck..?” You shrieked. Why the hell did he said that? Does this meant that... He was in a previous relationship with Suguru? Did he used you as a rebound? No, fuck, he sees suguru in you.
You understand it now.
“I’ll make sure you don’t do it again,” He whispered.
“Huh?”
“Make sure that you don’t massacre a whole ass village again so that they won’t separate you from me...”
Slowly, deliberately, his other hand drifted downward toward your ankle. Your heart drops as you felt him do that.
Oh fuck, he’s not planning on snapping your ankles, is he?
“Satoru, no, no, no, no, no!”
You strained against his crushing hold, but could only witness in horror as his fist closed around the delicate bones.
“If you do that, i’ll never forgive you— AHHH!”
A strangled scream caught in your throat as you felt the unmistakable snap of your ankle splintering beneath his strength.
White-hot pain lanced up your leg and your vision blurred with tears of misery. Before you could process the pain of the first break, his hand was upon your other ankle. You knew what was coming yet were powerless to prevent it. Another sickening crack reverberated through your shattered nerves as satoru callously contorted the joint beyond its limits. Bone fragmented, muscle tore, and ligaments ripped apart, leaving your legs crippled and limp.
----𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐄𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍
His fingers pressed insistently beneath your chin, a mixture of gentle caress and firm control as he meticulously groomed your hair, each stroke designed to emulate the exact style of Suguru’s locks.
Tying it back partially, he sought to replicate every minute detail, ensuring you bore an eerie resemblance to his obsession—Suguru. But the true horror lay in his pervasive fixation upon you as Suguru incarnate. He paid face surgeons to sculpt and mold  your face until the reflection in the mirror bore a warped semblance to Suguru’s features, he would drape you in Suguru’s attire and bestowing upon you the very essence of his fucking bestfriend.
And the worst of it all? he managed to find suguru’s daughters and practically forced you to take care of them—like the way suguru would take care of them. Even suguru’s daughters were horrified — yet they were too scared to even refuse.
All of the horrors that he had made you go through broke you completely.
“Perfect,” he murmured with a self-satisfied hum, stepping back to survey his handiwork.
You just sat there, disoriented, and feeling hollow as an empty shell.
Stripped of your true identity and coerced into being someone else you weren’t. The drugs he administered clouded your mind, the brainwashing eroding your sense of self until you could no longer discern who you are. The only thing you knew is that you’re suguru.
It was a bad punishment, real, real bad punishment.
Your identity was snatched, and you were no longer yourself.
He furrows his brow, observing the silence that hangs between you.
“C’mon speak, suguru.” he urges, his gaze piercing into yours.
“Isn’t it perfect?”
Suddenly, a flicker of realization dances in his eyes as they narrow, scrutinizing the subtle yet noticable difference between your eyes and suguru. The shift is imperceptible to most, but to him, it is a glaring anomaly that demands attention.
A smirk curls onto his lips
“Seems like we need to adjust those eyes of yours as well, huh? Don’t you agree, suguru ?” 
Satoru sighed as his calloused fingers tangled themselves in thick ebony locks, pulling your motionless form taut against his chest. An ichor-cold sense of wrongness had settled itself deep in his marrow, its barbs tearing at his insides. 
His beloved Suguru was already here... But... Where is his [Name]?
“Nanako and Mimiko would be upset to see you like this suguru...”
​​​​​RING
RING
Satoru blinked at the sudden shrill clamor emanating from his phone—and he realized that someone was calling him, still cradling your form  against his chest with a singular hand. He took the device from his trousers one-handed, calloused fingers opening his phone.
When at last the lock screen dissolved into view, an icy shiver seized his marrowed bones. 
It was you—in your normal self, kissing him in the cheek, and you two looked very happy.
Why did suddenly felt wrong?
...
... It felt wrong...
So, so wrong.
Why did nostalgia for your genuine self now claw so vehemently at the fissures in his heart, when only Suguru had the right to reside there?  
737 notes · View notes
landograndprix · 11 months
Text
「Feel the magic ๛ l.n」
part vii
✧.* you've finally secured your well deserved p1 after months of suffering with red bull and while you celebrate it the right way, love is in the air and everybody sees it now.
✧.* when i think about my muppets i think about this song, should i make like a playlist of songs that remind me of this fic, give y'all the vibes ive been having? 👀 spelling mistakes add character, don't mind them 🥰 this is a psa for the people who wanted to be on my taglist but never got tagged, i didn't forget or ignore you, I simply am unable to tag you and therefore removed you from the list feel free to ask me again so I can take a look at it. Taglist is open Love ya ❤️
✧.* prev part - next part
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, milouberger and 453,789 others
y/nusername I'd like to thank my parents— p1 baby!🏆
tagged: mclaren
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y/nloveee yes baaaaabbyyyyy 🤩🤩
norrizz one big fat fuck you to red bull!
adam_norris_pure_electric amazing race, amazing driver!🥇
carlandooo oh my gosh, I'm dead, Adam out here supporting his future daughter in law 😭
norry4 stop it 😭
ricky78 bring it home y/n!
natewhite this girls good, she should try racing in f1..
carlossainz55 well deserved! 🔥
chilisainz wish I had a supportive ex boyfriend 💀
y/nlandooo we're so back with our 1-2!
yourmomsuser super proud of you! 🥰
milouberger back where you belong!
hamilt44n girl, shut up..as if you didn't try to push her off the track halfway..🤨
redbullgirl come back please, perez is a joke 😢
landonorris that's my girlfriend 😍
bott_ass we were aware 😂
landonorris you got any plans tonight? wanna celebrate?
landosmclaren HOWLING ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED
maxfewtrell mega race 🙌
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y/nusername ending an amazing weekend with my favorite lil' guy 🧡
tagged: landonorris
view all 878 comments
norrizz honestly such a power couple!!
sharl16 oh they in love love huh?
bott_ass not the after sex selfie 😭
bananaclerc I was looking for this comment 😭
y/nlando y/n's finally showing more of her and lando on here 🥺
mrsnorris 🤮 get someone your own age 🤮
cecilemoulin I just know y'all were late because you've been watching tiktok's in bed all morning..
y/nusername Cecile thirst trap edits go hard
carlandooo y'all think y/n finally realised she likes this man? Seemed pretty one sided to me for a hot minute 😂
ceciley/n I think Cecile said in an interview that THEY aren't used to dating younger dudes and that she felt out of place for the first few weeks..pretty sure she meant herself and y/n 😉
carlandooo CECILE IS DATING SOMEONE?
ceciley/n yeah..max fewtrell? Girl where have you been? 😂
carlandooo under a fucking rock apparently! Wow, these girls really said young, cute and british? Yes ma'am 🥰 so real of them
ceciley/n a couple of besties dating another couple of besties 😂
hamilt44n where are Carlos and Pierre now? You think they gave up? :')
landonorris favourite lil' muppet 🧡
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Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @elliegrey2803 @ravisinghs-wife @glow-ish
Feel the magic taglist: @celesteblack08 @mrsmaybank13 @cha-hot @judesgfirl @roseseraj @kissesandmartinis @jpg3 @amulhermaisfelizdomundo @marialovesf1 @silkenthusiasts @luvrrish @laneyspaulding19 @emily-b @formula1bby @judespoisons @buckybarnessweetheart @strawberrychita @iifloweringnightsii @buendiabebeta @jjsprobablywrong @babyvinnie @mishaandthebrits @hockeyboysarehot
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10
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webslingingslasher · 4 months
Note
interest peaked… how the turn tables
how does trouble react when peter bites her? 🎤
'trouble?'
'reading.'
'trouble?'
'go away.'
'trouble!'
you promise yourself that this is the one and only time you'll give into him. your face must show how annoyed you are because peter softens you right up with 'i love you.'
'aw. i love you too, handsome.' you wait for more, he doesn't offer anything. you lean over for a quick kiss before settling back into his sheets. the second your eyes are back on your book, peter bids for more attention.
'cuddles?'
you're not moving a thing, peter said you could read all afternoon if you wanted and you're going to do it. you pat your chest while shifting down, if he wants a cuddle, he has to come to you.
'i'm reading.' peter doesn't need another clue, he's pushing himself up and moving to lay on top of you. his weight adds a nice pressure, subconsciously a hand finds itself dragging through his curls while the other supports your book.
'trouble?' it's a whisper, you respond with 'shh.' your hand slowly stills the further you find yourself invested in the story, peter doesn't like it one bit. you hit the next chapter, honing in on heavy dialogue you're taken from reality and thrown into the page.
you jump, a soft yelp tumbles from your lips while your book drops and you push at peter's cheek. 'ow, ow, ow, ow! stop biting, stop biting!' peter digs his teeth in further, you whine and try to hold him back, it hurts more.
'peter,' you plead with his name and it's enough to make him let up. 'what? you've got very yummy arms.' it's the same excuse you use on him, you frown and stare at the soft indent he left behind.
'you bit me.'
'payback. let me get another.' you squirm away, 'no!' peter catches your arm and holds you still, you're still trying to fight him off when he latches on to the meat of your bicep. 'you're nibbling, i don't nibble!' it's a lie, you use him like a chew toy and you should be thankful he's being so easy on you.
peter lightly thrashes his head from side to side, it's like a dog with a bone. peter's the one with a pain kink, not you. 'i don't like it! i bite, you kiss, that's the rule!'
sweet relief, your attention lost from your damp skin by falling into the deep pits of peter's eyes. they're so pretty that you could spend limitless hours just looking at them.
'i'd kiss you if i could have your attention for two seconds.'
'then ask me!' peter blinks, a small frown forms. 'i tried. you shut me out.' he was pining for your attention and went for the one thing that would rip you from your alternate universe.
'does my petey want some love?'
a tender kiss is placed where his teeth were a minute ago. 'just a little.' you could set aside a few minutes, your book wasn't going anywhere.
'okay, give me hugs.' you ready yourself for a blanket of peter, instead he shakes his head and uses a hand to hold himself up, over you. 'no hugs. kisses.'
'what if i want hugs?'
peter said what he said. 'kisses.'
'hugs.'
a pretend grumpy face, he surprises you with a peck. 'kisses.' you poke his shoulder. 'kisses always mean more to you, i know your secrets.'
'no secrets, i promise. can't a guy just makeout with his girlfriend without being interrogated?'
your eyebrows raise, 'from kisses to a makeout. see? i knew there was something up with you.' peter takes a deep breath and eases into that smile. the one full of boyish charm, the one that makes you feel warm and giddy under his touch because it feels like he's undressing you in his mind.
'trouble,' you lose all air when he places a barely there kiss on your lips. 'please let me kiss you.' you can't think straight when he whispers against you like this, especially when he's pleading.
'you can kiss me.' it's just as quiet, you can feel peter's smile when he leans in. he's so gentle you tug him closer by his shirt, in ten seconds you're pressing up and begging him for more.
you halfway notice when peter sets your book on his nightstand, this time you can't blame him for starting more than just a kiss. but you will.
'just a makeout, huh?'
'it's a paperback. we don't wanna crush it, right?'
'next time don't be so sneaky and just fuck me from behind while i'm reading.'
a sharp inhale, peter's pupils blow wide. an aggressive kiss, your bottom lip might be bruised in the morning. 'don't tempt me with a good time, trouble.'
'it's not tempting if i'm asking.' another kiss, peter can't hide his love if he tried.
'have i ever told you that you're the best thing to ever happen to me?'
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fangirl-dot-com · 8 months
Text
Chapter 19 - All Hail Prince Charles
As a Charles fan, the day he wins the Monaco Grand Prix will be the happiest day of my life (I will probably cry). also, weird that I legit forgot until now - is that I have not been doing fastest lap...and I completely forgot about sprint races. So, in this reality, there were no sprints or fastest points until now because I wanted Charles to have a grand slam!
So, please enjoy this fun chapter! much love to all!
like always comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are always appreciate!
TAG LIST IS CLOED
You stood next to the entrance to the paddock, phone out rapidly texting someone. With each sound of the turnstile, you thought it was the two brothers who you were waiting for. Well, them, their mother, and Max. 
Apparently, you had gotten the time wrong of when you needed to get to the paddock, and showed up almost two hours early. And, in pure introvert form (whenever you were around people you weren’t comfortable with), you just kept to yourself and waited right by the entrance. 
It was pretty busy in the paddock today. The color that stood out the most was the iconic red of the Tifosi, dressed to impress their favorite Monegasque driver. Even people who weren’t very fond of the sport came to support him. 
Charles was basically royalty. Which had you questioning if you and Max were “royalty” too, since you lived there. But, it didn’t extend as much as it does for Charles and his family. People practically kissed the ground he walked on. And maybe practically was an understatement as you had seen a guy do it one time. 
Your face was still buried in your phone, when someone suddenly bumped into you. You went to apologize before your eyes were set on your favorite pair of dimples. 
“Bonjour mon beau garcon,” you said softly, not to alert anyone in the surround area. You were still keeping the relationship on the down low, even if it had been almost two months. 
Arthur quickly hugged you, trying to make it not seem like a “romantic hug.” Besides, people had seen much hugs much more intimate than the ones you were now doing. Maybe you were toning it down a little too much. 
“Bonjour mon ange,” he whispered in your ear, making a blush cross your cheeks. Laughter was heard behind him and you peeked over his shoulder. 
Along with Max, Charles, and Pascale giving you smug looks, a certain German driver was also in the group. 
Not wasting anytime, you shoved your poor boyfriend to the side (completely missing his “kicked puppy dog eyes”), and jumped into the German’s arms. 
“Seb!” 
Now that got a lot of people’s attention. Suddenly camera clicks were heard from everywhere. You frantically pulled away. 
Oops. 
Sebastian looked a little shy in the limelight, or maybe it was just your imagination. But you were determined to get the cameras off of him. Your eyes darted to the red and white clad driver and suddenly you had an idea. The cameras weren’t focused on him, so it was perfect. 
You ran to the back of Charles and lightly put your hands of his back to push him out to the open. He gave you a questioning look. 
“Just do what you normally do Charlie.” 
Your eyes focused on an announcer with a megaphone. 
Perfect.
You raced over, said a few words to him, and came back to the group with megaphone in hand. 
“Kid, what are you doing?” Max asked, hands gripping his backpack. You ignored your older teammate and turned the thing on. 
With it almost kissing your lips, you started to yell hand outstretched in Charles’s direction. 
“All hail, Prince Charles Marc Herve, uh…” 
Arthur leaned over and whispered with a shit-eating grin on his face, “Perceval.” 
“Perceval – dude, how many middle names do you have – Leclerc!” 
Thankfully, your plan worked and now Charles was surrounded by multiple journalists and photographers. 
You ran back over to give the announcer the megaphone back. 
Looking back at Max, who was secretly recording Charles looking so lost in the crowd, you made your way to the group. 
“Shall we go Maximillian?” 
The Dutchman rolled his eyes. “That is not my name.” 
“Well if Charles has a lord-esque name, you can have one too! Thur, are you in our garage today or Ferrari?” 
He shot you a sad-ish smile. “I’m with Ferrari today. Seb and I are doing the thing.”
A look of clarity shone on your face. “Oooohhhh. Well then, you go do your thing. Wait, but you aren’t doing it with…” 
“Oui, but Sebastian is the guest and he wants me to be with him.” 
Your eyes playfully glared at the German, who held his hands up in mock-surrender. 
“I will return him in one piece kinde,” he promised. 
“Fine. Let’s go Maximilian.” 
“Geitje, once again, not my name.” 
“Then stop calling me a small goat. Well, I mean, I am a GOAT, in a sense.” 
“It’s cute!” 
Arthur watched as the two of you bickered, before going over to save his brother. It definitely didn’t help that Charles was on pole today, at his home race. Everyone was sweating and praying that this would be the year that he took his home race. Arthur was surprised that Max was in a playful mood, since he was starting a whopping P5 today and you were ahead of him at P4. 
He had wanted to ask you about it, but didn’t want to push for information that you might not have been comfortable to share.  
Starting Grid 
Charles Leclerc 
Carlos Sainz 
Lando Norris 
Y/n L/n 
Max Verstappen 
George Russell 
Lewis Hamilton 
Oscar Piastri 
Alex Albon
Logan Sargeant
Lance Stroll 
Yuki Tsunoda 
Fernando Alonso 
Pierre Gasly 
Daniel Ricciardo 
Valtteri Bottas 
Zhou Guanyu 
Esteban Ocon 
Kevin Magnussen 
Nico Hulkenberg 
Christian had asked you and Max to meet him quickly in one of the back rooms. You and Max were squished on one of the couches while your team principal comfortably sat on the opposite sofa. This felt like you and Max had been called to the principal’s office and you were about to get in trouble. 
Christian leaned forward. “Now, Max, we know that for some reason your tyres aren’t doing well in Monaco this year.” 
Max nodded, seeming to know where this was going. 
“But we wanted to ask you first if you’d be all right letting Y/n have the priority for this race. You are comfortably leading the championship as of right now. We would have liked to extend it by more points, but we can’t figure out what is wrong with the tyres this race.” 
Max sat for a moment and you winced. You knew he didn’t want to give up the giant gap that he had, especially since Charles won the last race as well. 
“It’s fine.” 
Your eyebrows raised as you looked at him. He met your eyes and gave you a smile that didn’t quite reach his. You knew he was mentally giving you the ok to go ahead, but it didn’t mean that you had to like it. Already knowing the race, Red Bull did not have the upper hand in Monaco. This race was for Ferrari and McLaren. 
The “meeting” didn’t go much longer, but the three of you did talk about new strategies so that the two of you could get the maximum points out of it. You both would be trying for fastest lap and as many positions gained as possible. 
Back in the garage, you whined as you were trying to clip the strap under your helmet. Normally, Arthur would be there to help, but no, he had to be in the enemy’s garage. You were silently cursing his and Seb’s management. 
Mitch thankfully saw your annoyance and came to help. 
“No help today?” she asked as she clipped the strap and then helped finagle your helmet to where it was supposed to go. 
“Nope,” you popped the ‘p,’ “he’s in enemy territory today.” 
“Ah.” 
You looked at her through the empty eye space. “Goodluck kiss?” You tried your best puppy eyes. 
The older woman rolled her eyes, but gave your helmet a kiss none-the-less. You grinned as you stepped into the car. 
It was definitely a sunny day in Monaco, that’s for sure. One of your mechanics held a small umbrella as you waited for the signal. 
“Radio check please Y/n.” 
“So Liam is in town, I saw him earlier. And we both know that this is thee Lightning McQueen circuit. Charles just keeps rolling his eyes. Also, Liam and his girlfriend invited me and Arthur for a double date to go to California for the summer break so that we can go see the Radiator Springs set up at Disneyland. Also!” 
“Ok, radio is working.” 
“Boooooo. You just don’t want to hear about my amazing plans. You could come too if you’d like!” 
“Kid, they gave the signal almost 5 seconds ago.” 
“Oh.” 
“And it’s lights out and away we go for the 2024 Monaco Grand Prix. Charles Leclerc has made a lightning start on his teammate. Did he switch out his car for another? Carlos Sainz is overtaken by Lando Norris on turn 1. Max Verstappen has made a position and is now in P5 ahead of his teammate. Now, Verstappen has complained about his tyre degradation all weekend long. We just need to see how long he can stay ahead of Y/n L/n as her tyres seem to last a bit longer than his.” 
“Mitch, I thought I was supposed to be ahead.” 
“Checking.”
What was Max doing? He had said that it was fine for you to have the priority, but was being kind of an ass right now. 
“This was not the strategy that we went over. He’s being an asshole right now.” 
“Seems like the Bulls are fighting as Y/n L/n is voicing her irritation. I do wonder what they went over prior to the race.”  
Arthur watched as your tried to get around your teammate. His heart sunk a bit as you were pushed off the track, but got right back on. Pascale stood right next to him and put a hand on his shoulder for comfort. He wished he could be in your garage right now, because this was the last race until Austria that he’d be able to attend.
Mitch was finally able to give you an answer. “Ok, you are going to box now.” 
You entered the pit lane and were fitted with mediums since you started on softs. This race was going to be a one-stop-wonder. 
Right as you were coming out of the pit lane, you saw two cars collide right with each other. 
“THE TWO MERCEDES ARE OUT! L/N IS OUT OF THE PITS AND IS IN THE MIDDLE OF IT! THE SMOKE IS THICK, DID SHE JOIN THE DEBRIS?” 
It was all in slow motion for you. One minute, you were in clear skies, the next you were covered in smoke. You had seen George try to go a bit wide, but you guessed he didn’t see Lewis. You frantically tried to remember where they seemed to stop as you continued through the smoke. 
Arthur had watched your car disappear behind the curtain of smoke. His heart sank even more than it had a few laps ago. He quickly stood up to look at the small tv a bit closer. He was joined by Sebastian and his mom. 
“Tu as dit que tu ferais attention,” he whispered. 
GP came over Max’s radio. “Red flag at the pit entrance, Max. Come in so they can clear the debris.” 
“The pits? Was it Y/n? I see smoke.” 
“It was the Mercedes.” 
“But she was right there?” 
Max quickly pulled in and all but jumped out of the car. 
Thankfully, you had expertly dodged the debris and flew out of the smoke. 
“Woo, that was a bit smoky. I’m guessing red flag?” you asked Mitch. 
“Yep, do your lap and then come in.” 
It took you a bit longer to get back, since you had just pitted, but you finally made it. What you weren’t expecting was a giant hug from Max who kept apologizing. 
“I’m sorry for the first move, I shouldn’t have done that.” 
You bumped him a bit. “No biggie. Just please don’t do that again. We don’t need a Brocedes 2.0. Time for a juice box.” 
The two of you thankfully found some juice boxes before you had to get back into the car. It would be another grid start, with how everyone was when they were out of the track. So you would have come out second, still behind Charles but in front of Lando. Max would be behind Carlos in P5. 
At the start, Charles still had a great get away, pulling way in front of you like Max had been able to do in 2023. You were able to keep your P2 ahead of Lando while Max gained Carlos’s position. 
Thankfully, the rest of the race was smooth going. Max had not been able to keep up with Lando and fell behind Carlos and ended the race in a pitiful P5.  
However, the crowds were roaring as Charles finally brought home the Monaco Grand Prix. 
“I can practically hear the celebrations starting. As he did in 2019, Charles Leclerc has won back-to-back races. And for the first time in 93 years, a Monegasque has crossed the checkered flag in P1. Charles Leclerc has done it and wins the 2024 Monaco Grand Prix. It is also a Grand Slam for the Ferrari driver as he had pole, P1, and fastest lap. 
“He is followed by Red Bull’s Y/n L/n and McLaren’s Lando Norris. Carlos Sainz finishes fourth with Max Verstappen finishing fifth.” 
Race Results 
Charles Leclerc + fastest lap – 26 points 
Y/n L/n – 18 points 
Lando Norris – 15 points 
Carlos Sainz – 12 points 
Max Verstappen – 11 points 
Oscar Piastri – 8 points 
Yuki Tsunoda – 6 points 
Logan Sargeant – 4 points 
Pierre Gasly – 2 points 
Daniel Ricciardo – 1 point  
Alex Albon
Lance Stroll 
Fernando Alonso 
Kevin Magnussen 
Zhou Guanyu 
Valtteri Bottas 
Esteban Ocon 
Nico Hulkenberg 
Lewis Hamilton – DNF 
George Russell – DNF 
Champions Standings 
Max Verstappen – 179 points 
Charles Leclerc – 146 points 
Y/n L/n – 98 points 
Lando Norris – 88 points 
Oscar Piastri – 61 points 
Lewis Hamilton – 60 points 
Carlos Sainz – 46 points 
George Russell – 35 points 
Alex Albon – 26 points 
Fernando Alonso – 23 points
Logan Sargeant – 23 points  
Daniel Ricciardo – 22 points
Yuki Tsunoda – 2 points 
Pierre Gasly – 1 point 
Lance Stroll 
Zhou Guanyu 
Kevin Magnussen 
Nico Hulkenberg 
Valtteri Bottas 
Esteban Ocon 
Constructors Standings  
Red Bull – 277 points 
Ferrari – 192 points 
McLaren – 149 points 
Mercedes – 95 points 
Williams – 49 points 
Racing Bulls – 24 points 
Aston Martin – 23 points 
Alpine – 1 point 
Haas 
Alpha Romeo 
It felt nice, to be up with Charles and Lando on the podium. It would be your first without Max. Thinking back to the last weekend in Imola, you felt proud. You honestly didn’t care if your parents were watching or not. You being on the podium without the three-time world champ felt like the biggest middle finger plus an extra “fuck them” for good measure. 
You looked down at the crowd and saw Arthur standing with Pascale, Max, Christian, and Sebastian. You tried to spray them to the best of your ability after having almost dumped everything on Charles, who may or may not have cried during the national anthem (it’s ok though because you were crying right along with him). 
You knew how much it meant for him, especially after Jules and his dad. 
And it was great to see Lando, since he hasn’t podiumed all season long. Thankfully, he didn’t break Charles’s trophy (because you think the Ferrari driver would have cried again). 
To celebrate, the Leclercs picked a nice restaurant to go to, instead of a night club. Max, who was also invited, brought Kelly and P as well. 
“So Charles, now that you won the Monaco Grand Prix, do you feel even more like Lightning McQueen now?” 
y/n.89 has posted
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y.n89 if you told me that I would have podiumed with lightning mcqueen himself at his home race (and kind of mine as well), I would have laughed in your face. Sad my teammate couldn't join me, but this is for the people who thought I wasn't good enough. look at me now! kachow ⚡️⚡️
and I got to see my pretty boy as well!
tagged: charles_leclerc
liked by redbullracing, y/n_updates, liamlawson, and 67,204 others
y/n_on_top she cracks me up with each post, she did not tag Charles on lightning's picture
y/nxarthur hmmmm boyfriend maybe lives in Monaco, Arthur lives in Monaco, therefore - Arthur is the boyfriend
y/nxollie keep dreaming
charles_leclerc did you seriously post a picture of a cartoon character instead of me??
y/n.89 yes, because I asked you for pictures and you never responded 🤔 charles_leclerc we were at dinner?? maxverstappen1 and???? y/n.89 yeah, and?????????????
olliebearman MOM ON PODIUM
y/n_lives_inmyhead_rentfree see this is for the people literally shipping a mom and son y/n&co a single mom who works two jobs...
arthur_leclerc so so happy for you!
y/n'ssecretbf I feel bad for her boyfriend because her dad is literally Christian Horner, big brothers are Max Verstappen and Charles Leclerc, and her best friend is Arthur Leclerc (no one is safe from the dimples)
liamlawson lightning mcqueen is the goat
maxverstappen1 no I am lewishamilton you're wrong there y/n.89 you are both wrong, who has 5 piston cups and who doesn't landonorris preach! 🙌🙌
y/n.nation that whole podium was chaos, glad lando didn't break the trophy
chachanation glad I wasn't the only one crying
rascalflatts guess we have to accept the invite to play at COTA
y/n.89 HELLO?????? BIG FAN liamlawson ME TOO maxverstappen1 oh no
charles_leclerc has posted
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charles_leclerc I never would have thought that I'd win a race in 2024 or even back to back races. Thank you to the team. This is for everyone who thought I was done with...I hope I have proved you wrong. For Papa and Jules, I'm home! Forza Ferrari ❤️🏎️
liked by arthur_leclerc, pascale_leclerc, suderiaferrari, and 1,294,028 others
cha16 OUR BOY RIGHT THERE
leclerc_on_top YEAAHHHHHHHHHH
chuck_leclerck I was crying so much. was worried about the restart but he pushed through!
y/n.89 so so proud of you Charlie! Max will let you become WDC next year
maxverstappen1 when did I EVER agree to that?? y/n.89 just now :)
lestappenlove oh my gosh, first Monegasque in almost 100 years to win their home race! history maker right here!
max&Charlie sad that max wasn't there to celebrate with him :(
leclercbros apparently some people saw Max at dinner with the Leclerc family
y/n_best_rookie was y/n there as well? leclercbros yes she was! along with kelly and P
tifosi4ever now Carlos just needs to win the Spanish Grand Prix and then one of them needs to win Monza!
porsche.motorsport with arthur_leclerc and sebastianvettel has posted
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porsche.motorsport we are happy to announce the signing of Arthur Leclerc and Sebastian Vettel to our team. They will be preparing for future endurance racing and will be brand ambassadors until then as well. Welcome to the team Arthur and Seb!
liked by y/n.89, leclercbros, endurancexf1, and 9,204 others
endur4nce I was not expecting this today....but I'm not complaining
thurthur I did not see this coming, even after seb was in the garage with Arthur in Monaco
leclercbros oh yeah, I saw that but didn't even suspect anything
y/n.89 and what do we say?? ☺️☺️
arthur_leclerc thank you y/n for setting this amazing opportunity up (not like I got signed because I was incompetent) sebastianvettel just the pretty face for us arthur_leclerc w o w
arthur-leclerc4ferrari I guess I need to change my user
arthur-leclerc4porsche that's better
y/nxarthur this is sad because I looked at the calendar and Arthur will miss the next two races along with the Vegas race
porsche welcome to the family!
y/n.89 when will I get added? I have my two Porsches and haven't bought any other cars porsche.motorsports just sign with us?? redbullracing stay back from our rookie 🤺 maxverstappen1 yeah 🤺 🤺
Vettel-with-leclerc the lineup I didn't know I needed
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833 notes · View notes
neptuneiris · 9 months
Text
Wild Hearts | (One Shot)
'you, it's always been you'
pairing: prince!aemond × lowborn!reader
summary: you and he can't be together, yet the two of you have fallen for each other. but the Gods are not merciful and you both have to let go. but by comparison, your charming prince doesn't think the same way you do.
word count: 8.6k
next part • main masterlist
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this is the new idea that I was talking about hehe🤭
i hope you like it a lot and first of all, i want you to know that there will be part two and nothing else. so enjoy this, dig it and let me know your opinion that is the most excited i am to read❤
enjoy and thank you so much for your support beautiful people!
warnings: angst, sex content, arranged married, minor mentions of cuts and blood, smut but not so elaborate.
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The Gods can be cruel.
And for some time they have been cruel, especially to you.
You are a lady, yes, but not of a great house enough to be worth anything really big and significant. All your father can offer the Realm is a few soldiers, horses and you.
You are the only daughter of an arranged marriage trying to find their place among the Court. And when you are born a woman, your duty is to marry a suitable man, please him and give birth to as many children as possible.
That was your purpose in coming to King's Landing after Queen Alicent approved your stay at the Red Keep and you became a lady-in-waiting to the highborn ladys who also remain at Court.
But no one, not even you, could have prevented that those plans would no longer be a priority for you the moment you met Prince Aemond Targaryen.
You knew of the one-eyed prince's reputation, as well as his brutality in combat, his cold behavior and also of his recognition as the rider of the largest dragon in the world. But most of all, you knew that his disinterested and sometimes mean personality... was due to how he lost his eye at such a young age.
But that was what he wanted to show all the people of the Court and its visitors.
After such humiliating years of trying to prove himself while at the same time listening to whispers and rumors about him and the pity he caused people for losing his eye, Aemond had no interest in pleasing the Court, so he was just mean, disinterested and cold.
But with you it was all different.
Perhaps it was being alone for so long that he finally got tired of himself and let you in and see his other side, his true side that very few were privileged to see. After all, you were just a lowborn lady who had lived her whole life with the same duty as him: to please the Realm and fill its needs.
But even he never imagined that you and he would understand each other so well.
The gleam of his violet eye, charged with an unusual intensity and determination, the effect he made you feel when you looked back at him and saw his patch covering his left socket and the way he spoke and behaved with you, triggered a wave of unknown emotions and expectations in you.
Your first casual encounter with the prince began in the library, where you exchanged literary tastes. You revealed your fascination for the history of the Andals, as well as shared with him how interesting you found the stories of his family, the Targaryens.
And he shared with you his admiration for history and philosophy as well.
Your casual encounters with him continued in the library and before long, those encounters extended to walks in the gardens. Those walks became a mostly secret habit, where you not only shared equal opinions about books and history, but where you both got to know each other a little more.
And despite the growing friendship and the bonds that intertwined with every conversation and interaction, the weight of undeniable reality persisted.
However, neither of you stopped.
On some trips he had to make, on every return he would always bring some gift for you, whether it was a piece of jewelry or a new book that you don't have access to, to leave secretly in you chamber. Or he would even surprise you with a rare flower that is not seen in the Crowlands, handing it to you so delicately while you tried to keep the blush on your cheeks from being so obvious.
You too tried to look casual when you went to the training yard just to watch him train discreetly, admiring his skills and in every fight smiling proudly every time he made his opponents surrender to him.
And in the midst of everything and everyone, his violet eye always met yours.
At banquets and celebrations it was also the same. The two of you couldn't engage in conversation as such, at least not alone, so all night long, you could only exchange glances and act like complete strangers.
But in the occasional places where the two of you meet and no one else is around, you can act completely free.
He shared with you the story of how he claimed Vhagar, told you more about the history of his ancestors, even taught you some High Valyrian words, while you, who in comparison to him do not possess anything as great and exciting as he does, share with him your thoughts, dreams and tastes.
You both became friends. You became the friend he didn't know he needed and you definitely didn't expect someone like him, especially him, to enjoy your company so much.
And during those years, you couldn't blame the Gods for falling completely in love with the prince.
That was your total freedom and decision, even though you knew how impossible the situation was and that the two of you could probably never be together.
Your house is not worth enough to allow a union between you and a prince of the Realm. It was also useless to suggest it, because the answer would be no, both from the Queen and from your parents, who would have been totally pleased.
But Aemond is destined for more, you know that. And that more is definitely not you and not even close.
And despite this, you couldn't help but imagine as a fleeting dream the moment when he and you unite and become one. A dream that will never happen in which you finally become his wife and you can call him yours, just as he can also call you his, in body and soul.
But that dream is finally shattered when they announce the official betrothal between him and Lady Floris Baratheon.
It was something that was eventually going to happen, you knew it was going to happen, but still, the news takes you by surprise and your heart breaks into pieces, while everyone around you rejoices at the news and approves.
The days following the betrothal announcement become dark and sad for you. You retreat most of your time in your chamber, not having the mood to go out and face the Court, much less him.
And when you had to face the daylight, your steps became stealthy and sparse, trying to keep your distance as much as possible and avoiding any possible encounter with him or anyone else from the royal family.
Aemond of course realized the distance you took and respected it. Not because he knew exactly what happened, but because he thought you had other important matters that did not allow you to share your time with him.
It wasn't until an audience at the Court where the Queen and the Hand of the King attend to the needs of the people, that Aemond finally caught a glimpse of you. But you didn't return his gaze even for a moment. And it is only then that he tries to understand the reason for your distancing, but your eyes avoid any eye contact with him.
You spend several days living in the same way, until one silent morning, Aemond finds you in the library all alone. He knows this is not your favorite time to read, nor is it his, so to say you are avoiding him is clear at that moment.
He opens one of the doors gently and closes it audibly enough to get your attention. He sees perfectly how your whole body tenses and nerves are reflected in your gaze, as well as discontent.
That especially catches his attention and with more purpose he wanders deeper into the library, watching you completely intently and in search of an explanation, wanting to know what he has done to make his presence before you now uncomfortable and annoying to you.
"My prince," you say politely enough, bowing your head to him, but already wanting to leave.
You certainly did not expect him to appear and now you only try to hide from him as much as you can so that he avoids looking at the disappointment on your face.
"My Lady," he says, still with bewilderment in his gaze, taking a couple of steps towards you, "It is good to finally see you after so many weeks without your presence."
You force a small smile, lowering your gaze.
"It's good to see you too, my prince."
His closeness begins to unsettle you, feeling each step he takes towards you as an echo of emotions you'd rather keep hidden. And this is exactly why you desperately seek a way out, a convincing excuse to get away from him.
"If you'll excuse me, my prince, I must retire," you decide to say without further ado, hoping that it will work, "I wish you a good day."
But you only manage to move two steps forward when he quickly blocks your path.
"Wait."
Instantly you watch him intently and in awe, feeling your heart begin to beat too fast, as he looks at you confused and hopeful.
"You've been... absent lately," he says, his words laden with a mixture of confusion and longing.
You swallow hard, averting your gaze from his for a moment. You don't even want to look him in the eye but that would be rude and not appropriate behavior in front of a prince. So you have no choice.
"Yes," you say in a mumble, trying to find an excuse quickly, "I-I've had to take care of some important matters with my family. Also, my responsibilities at Court have kept me occupied with the ladies and other engagements, which has left me less free time, my prince."
And despite your explanation, really not at all convincing, Aemond can't help but feel annoyed.
"And will you stop saying that?" he inquires in a low tone and you watch him in confusion.
"What do you mean, my prince?"
"Exactly that, my title," he points out deliberately, "There's no one else here, it's just you and me. I don't understand what all the formality is about."
You press your lips together, again averting your gaze from him, as you as well as he, feel that tension between the two of you, a tension completely unfamiliar and one you have never felt before in each other's presence.
You had never felt uncomfortable in his presence and you had never wanted to get away from him before.
"I apologize. It was not my intention to offend you," you observe him with a serious expression, "If you'll excuse me, I have to leave now to attend to an engagement."
Again you try to walk past him and head for the library doors, but Aemond prevents it once again, blocking your path and pushing you back with his determined and clearly annoyed gaze.
"You are avoiding me," he sentences, firm with his words, showing his inconformity, surprising you, "Nothing is the same between both of us anymore and your explanations don't justify it," he says, with annoyance in his voice and a determination, "Did something happen that I don't know about?"
He asks, watching you with a restrained fury, mostly to see how you try to escape from him, while you press your lips together, trying not to let your look show your pain, disappointment and resignation.
But his gaze clings to yours with an intensity charged with longing, wanting to know, while the silence is uncomfortable and you feel again that tension between the two of you. Until finally you decide to break the silence to not quite answer her question, still evading it.
"This is inappropriate. We shouldn't be alone."
You say without looking him in the eye and that only increases the anger inside him more, watching you without understanding.
"Why the shyness all of a sudden?"
You bite your lips, feeling the discontent all over your insides as you say your next words.
"You are betrothed. People might think badly of you and me if they see us here alone."
"Oh, please Y/N," he tells you incredulously, annoyed, "You're acting ridiculous."
"Aemond-
"Why this sudden concern for appearances?" he questions, his tone infused with irritation and annoyance, "Everyone knows we're close, we always have been, and now it's inappropriate?" he inquire, not understanding.
You let out a short breath, closing your eyes for a moment, really not wanting this to be any harder than it probably will be.
"You don't understand," you murmur sadly, biting your lips, "You are betrothed now," you observe him with the resistance to cry in your gaze, "Now there are limits we cannot cross. And it would be best if this were no longer to go on," you say with a lump in your throat, "Your gifts and our meetings must stop, for the good of your future marriage and out of respect for your f-future... wife."
The weight of your words are felt in your tone, with sadness invading you as you utter them, as well as the ending of this... friendship.
Again the heavy silence hangs between the two of you, laden with a sadness and helplessness that neither of you can control. And although Aemond doesn't fully understand your reasons for distancing yourself from him, he knows there is something else that he still can't quite figure it out.
"Y/N, if you're upset because I didn't tell you about the plans my mother and grandsire had for me-
"No, no, I assure you it's not that," you hasten to say, hiding your sadness and disappointment, "It would eventually happen, wouldn't it?" you shrug, trying to smile genuinely towards him, but you can't, "You must do your duty and I will too, sooner or later," you say, lowering your gaze.
Aemond is speechless for a moment, watching you and nothing else, still feeling the guilt inside, while you struggle to contain your true emotions and shout to him in that moment that you love him, let him know once and for all, though it won't change anything.
"Y/N..." he murmurs, his barely audible voice full of bewilderment and a hint of pain, "Still I didn't want to-
"No, no... it's not your fault," you say again quickly, struggling to keep your composure, "Truly, it's all right. I should leave now."
He lets out a sigh, lowering his gaze for a second to look at you in concert with longing and concern.
"Can we please talk about this? I don't want things to end up like this between us."
"Don't worry," you try to smile genuinely at him, but rather a grimace appears on your lips, "I'm sure we can meet in the hallways and talk at the feast."
You tell him in a confident and assured tone, but even you know that won't be true.
"Oh and... hum... congratulations on your upcoming nuptials," you say with a lump in your throat and a forced smile on your lips.
To you, the falsity of your congratulations echoes in the air, a subtle echo of disappointment and resignation flooding your heart. Aemond tries to say something with the right words, but you don't give him the time as you finally move forward and no one stops you, each step echoing with the heaviness of what could have been and was not.
But just when you think you've managed to get far enough away, a hand gently lands on your arm, once again stopping you.
"Wait, please."
Aemond's voice sounds full of urgency and longing, making your breath catch for a second. And when you turn to look at him with the clear resignation and sadness in your gaze, his look reveals a mixture of torment and determination, frustration as well.
"I did not wish for this, Y/N," he confesses truthfully, his voice soft and emotionally charged. "It is not my desire to marry Lord Borros' daughter. That is not what I wish for myself."
Your eyes fill with tears as you hear his words, surprise in your gaze. And he stares directly into your eyes with despair, as if his thoughts are trying to be conveyed through his gaze.
And even though you have nothing to say regarding that, he continues with a confession that takes your breath away.
"Y/N..." he whispers, his expression heavy with longing. "If I had a choice, if the decision were mine, I would not hesitate in....
His words hang in the air, causing confusion in you for a moment, but as you watch him closely, his gaze speaks for him.
He watches you with attention, longing and hope, adoringly seeing the way your beautiful purple dress highlights your figure and beauty, with those precious and discreet jewels adorning your neck and fingers... his woman.
He shows you his affection and expresses it simply by observing you that he doesn't need to say anything else aloud. The meaning of her words is dispersed between the two of you, revealing a shared desire and a deep connection.
As you, upon understanding, surprise and hope collide within you, leaving you breathless at the implicit, yet clear revelation. Emotions intertwine in a whirlwind of feelings as the weight of his words sink deep within you. Your heart only beats faster, unable to believe what you are hearing, as time seems to have stopped, unable to speak.
And only then there, you can feel joy in knowing that your feelings are reciprocated, but the pain of knowing that it is now too late, simply ruins everything and fills you with pain.
"Why are you saying it until now?" you whisper with your voice broken and your gaze lowered.
"Y/N, please-
You don't let him say anything else, as with a lump in your throat and tears streaming down your cheeks, a sight Aemond doesn't like to see, you turn away from him more quickly and walk out of the library, leaving him alone with the weight of these confessions and unspoken words.
Also with a heart full of regret.
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The news of your courtship came weeks after the last time you spoke to Aemond in the library.
You definitely did not expect to hear that at all, as you felt like you had been unexpectedly punched hard in your stomach and a sharp pain settled in your chest as your father spoke complacently about how he received two advantageous offers for the asking of your hand, Lord Ronan Redwyne and Lord Alan Beesbury.
Despite your father's efforts to express the importance and political benefits of such possible unions, to you it was as if the air itself had become heavier and stifling.
Only on this occasion the Gods had been good to you, as both men are the same age as you, so the fear of having to marry a man who multiplies your age and was surely going to be bad to you evaporates.
But still, you feel trapped and obligated.
Of course, your parents are quick to push you to start having conversations with both men to see which of the two is the most suitable for you.
Lord Alan, with his refined presence and gentle smile, known to be a skilled knight, is kind and very gentlemanly. You always see his attempt to make you feel comfortable with his presence, also in the topics of conversation that arise between the two, telling you about his home, his family, some stories and sharing some wishes with you.
You appreciate that, as you can tell he's doing his best, but even so, your mind reels at the thought of him being the possible candidate to take your hand, which adds another layer of complexity to your situation.
The same goes for Lord Ronan.
Despite his kindness, chivalry and the attractiveness of his face, you find no peace in the situation. You don't even care that they are both advantageous for a future marriage, all you want is freedom, to wait a little longer until you heal.
But at least you are being given the choice, a privilege not many women get from their parents when it comes time to marry and simply sell them as a trophy to the first advantageous man.
"It's a beautiful day, don't you think, my Lady?" says Ronan, breaking the silence between the two as you stroll through the Red Keep gardens.
"Yes, it is," you reply with a forced smile, lowering your gaze, keeping your pace slow.
He watches you intently.
"I just want you to know that I am eager to get to know you better, my Lady," he tells you gently and formally, "And any questions you have about me, you can tell me. Also any thoughts you have, I will be pleased to hear them."
You nod politely, feeling a little uncomfortable about the situation, unable to help yourself. And though you truly appreciate Ronan's kindness, your heart still yearns for something that now eludes you.
As you continue the walk, you strive to find something in Ronan, anything, just as you do whenever you are in Lord Alan's company, but you always fail. And even though neither of them is a bad man, you know that they too are caught up in choosing a future wife that is not entirely of their choosing.
"I thank you for your kindness, my Lord."
You say in a sincere voice, looking him in the eyes for the first time since you had started the walk,
"And also for your interest. Not many men are interested in the thoughts of women these days."
Ronan places a kind and understanding little smile on his lips, nodding in your direction.
"There is nothing to be thankful for, my Lady. And I know it's only a short time since we've begun to know each other, but I enjoy your company."
You nod again, keeping your gaze straight ahead, unable to help but feel how you still feel overwhelmed by the weight of courtship and the fact that you will soon marry him or Lord Alan.
And at the same time, reality dawns on you with undeniable clarity: Ronan and Alan are good men, but neither is him.
While both may be honorable companions, your heart still yearns for someone you can't have, feeling utterly sad and resigned, because it's not fair, not to the two of them either.
But how can you make those feelings go away fast?
And just when things couldn't be more unexpected for you, as you turn down one of the bush paths along with Ronan, you both find yourselves face to face with Aemond accompanied by Lady Floris at his side, who were walking in the opposite direction.
And the air is enveloped with immediate tension.
You knew that eventually the news of your courtship with two possible candidates to give your hand in marriage would reach Aemond's ears, but when your eyes involuntarily meet his, you see only dissatisfaction and restrained fury.
This triggers a whirlwind of emotions within you, trying to disguise your surprise and discomfort, also nerves, as well as you try to focus on your companion, trying to move on and appear unaffected by this.
"Lady Y/N," Lady Floris greets politely with a smile, breaking the silence, "Lord Ronan," she address him, "How lovely to see you both this morning."
"Lady Floris," you reply, trying to remain calm, then look almost fearfully at Aemond, "Prince Aemond," you tilt your head slightly, biting the inside of your cheek.
"My Lady," he answers you in a soft tone.
Ronan at your side also greets Lady Floris in a respectful manner, then turns to Aemond.
"My prince."
"Lord Ronan," says Aemond, in a dismissive tone, observing you attentively and at the same time in seriousness.
Aemond's tone does not go unnoticed by you, with an intensity on his face that does not go unnoticed either, as you struggle to remain calm in the face of the uncomfortable situation.
It is clear that Ronan's presence at your side does not please him at all.
As Lady Floris at his side, she attempts to carry on a polite conversation, oblivious to the tension that has taken over the moment.
"I would like to offer my best wishes to you both on your courtship," Lady Floris begins to say kindly, "Fortunately the prince and I are in the same place as you and understand what it can be to have expectations high in families if you decide to join your houses."
You feel more the knot in your stomach and the discomfort all over your body, not daring to say anything regarding that, while Aemond remains just as silent as you.
And fortunately Ronan is the one who appreciates Floris' gesture, while Aemond keeps his eye on you with an expressionless but penetrating gaze, also watching Ronan from time to time.
"Thank you, my Lady," Ronan replies courteously, "Your words are most kind and we wish you both well in your future marriage."
"Of course. We hope to see you both at our upcoming wedding," Floris adds with a kind and visibly excited smile, while you again feel your heart give a painful jump.
And since you say nothing, nor does Aemond, Ronan hastens to speak.
"Of course, my Lady. We will see you there."
With pain in your eyes, your gaze involuntarily drifts to Aemond for a brief moment, where he is already watching you. And in that fleeting moment, the looks in both of your eyes convey more than words can express.
With a polite bow, the four of you take your leave and each pair continues on their own way.
You try to focus on your steps along with Ronan's, but the echo of tension and unspoken feelings leave an unpleasant sensation throughout your body. And that's when you hope that soon, both you and he will find peace in your respective futures.
But it didn't look like that was going to happen anytime soon. Neither did acceptance.
Aemond continued the rest of his walk with Floris in the gardens with his mind still focused on the encounter with you and that boy clearly unworthy of you. He didn't even pay attention to what Floris was talking about, he had not the slightest interest and obliged, he had to complete his walk with her contributing very little to the conversation.
Even he himself could not avoid the feeling of suffocation and frustration that invaded him. Seeing Y/N, his Y/N, next to that poor boy, one of his possible candidates to take her hand in marriage, provoked a mixture of indescribable emotions inside him and he made a great effort to keep his composure.
He feels furious and emotionally on the verge of exploding, like a mad man, with impotence filling him with rage.
Why should she marry a man who was not him? Why should he be forced to witness her courtship with another man? Why couldn't he have realized that she also loves him the same way he loves her and reacted sooner?
He felt that he was really going to go crazy, so as soon as he bids farewell to Floris and leaves her in the company of the other ladies of the Court, he heads for the training yard.
Big mistake.
As soon as his presence arrives at this place of the Red Keep, the figure of Lord Ronan pulls him out of his thoughts and draws his full attention.
At least he has the decency to hold a sword.
He thinks to himself, watching as he finds himself engrossed in his own training, accompanied by other knights, practicing his sword moves. He also thinks about focusing on his own training, but finds it a better idea to meet the candidate of his dear friend Y/N, wanting to know what truly awaits her.
After all, Lord Ronan is not the only candidate, Lord Alan also frequents the training yard and will eventually see him as well. So with a determined step, he approaches him.
"Lord Ronan," he says in a cool but controlled tone as he approaches, heading towards the weapons table.
"Prince Aemond," Ronan replies, stopping his training and turning to him, "It is good to see you here as well, my prince."
His gaze assesses Ronan closely, noting his every gesture and movement. And despite the anger still flowing through his veins, he remains calm, not revealing too much of his thoughts.
"I guess you don't train enough at home. House Redwyne is best known for making sweet wine from the grapes that grow on your island," he comments neutrally, watching Ronan's position with meticulous attention.
"Ah... no, my prince," Ronan says politely, "I have had training lessons with the sword, among other weapons, since I was a young boy. So have other members of my family and I assure you we are well trained," he replies, adjusting the position of his sword, "After all, a knight must remain prepared at all times."
"Hm," he says seriously, "And that is what you have accomplished with so many years of training?"
Ronan remains calm in the face of the prince's critical gaze, though Aemond's insinuation resonates with a defiant tone.
"P-pardon me?"
"With those moves is that how you're going to ensure protection for your future wife?" he inquires with a dismissive tone, challenging Ronan with his words.
Tension begins to be felt in the air, the verbal confrontation slipping between the two men. And though Ronan maintains his composure, not wanting his words to affect him, the disdain in the prince's words does not go unnoticed.
"Appearances can be deceiving, my prince," Ronan said calmly, controlling each word to convey determination, "And my duty as protector of my future wife is not limited to combat alone. I suppose there are more important aspects."
Aemond tilts his head, watching him in confusion.
"And what aspects are those, my Lord?" he asks, clearly disinterested.
"Loyalty, anticipation and sacrifice," he replied determinedly. "Protection goes beyond sword skills; it involves being willing to give your all for the person you are sworn to protect."
Ronan's words echoed in the air, filling the space between them with a seriousness that could not be ignored. And Aemond, his brow furrowed, lets out a sigh and watches him more seriously than before.
"Do you hear yourself, my lord? Speaking like the ladies of the Court who read and listen to love ballads," he snaps, watching him in disapproval, "Loyalty, anticipation and sacrifice are not going to protect your future wife from a life-threatening attack," he says and then turns away, taking his sword and a shield from the table.
Ronan swallows hard.
"You need not worry, my prince. Still I assure you that I am well prepared for combat."
"Oh yeah?" he looks at him expectantly, turning to him with his weapons in hands, "Then prove it."
Ronan looks a little confused.
"My prince-
"Come on," he interrupts him, egging him on with defiance, discontent and agitation in his tone and look, "If you're as skillful as you proclaim, then prove it."
The atmosphere grows more tense, as Aemond waits for Ronan to accept his challenge and prove his worth beyond words. Both men hold each other's gazes firmly, with the tension increasing by the second, but neither takes a step back.
The confrontation becomes tangible. Glares charged with a subtle but unmistakable rivalry. And without further words, the air filled with the anticipation of the physical training ahead, as the two head to the center of the training yard, each preparing in their own way.
Aemond tightens his grip on his sword and without hesitation, lunges towards Ronan with fierce determination, causing the poor knight to have little anticipation to protect himself from his sword, but managing to dodge it and answer him in kind.
At first it appears to be casual training, yet Aemond wants to get a reaction out of him.
And between every clash of swords and every move full of speed and precision, at every failure of Ronan, Aemond taunts and shouts questions and insults at him in a defiant voice while demanding superior performance.
And at every failure and every taunt, Ronan's determination grows, also inevitably to the prince's provocations.
"Is that all you can do!?"
Aemond exclaims arrogantly to him, wiping the sweat from his brow, trying to unsettle him.
Ronan growls and focuses on his movements, responding with brutality and force, trying to answer every blow he threw at him, which to Aemond, couldn't be more pathetic and weak movements.
"This is what you plan to defend yourself with? This is what you have learned?" he inquires, mockingly, "What a shame."
Ronan lowers his sword a little, watching him in bewilderment and panting in exhaustion.
"My prince-
He tries to say but Aemond won't let him.
"No," he tells him seriously, "Be a fucking man and fight me back."
Aemond raises his sword again and slams it against his, causing him to lose his balance, while Ronan as best he can defends himself from their attacks, while the combat begins to attract the attention of the other knights and some people of the Court.
And only when Aemond sees that they have just started and he can no longer stand and does not even have more strength in his arms, the confrontation went from a simple duel to a battle without mercy.
And he in a fit of anger and frustration, leads to hit him with his foot in the chest with excessive force, making him gasp in pain and throwing him to the ground, and then walk quickly towards him, with purpose, raising his sword, so Ronan quickly tries to get up, raising his sword, blocking his attack.
Then Aemond's sword dangerously grazes Ronan's shoulder, knocking him back to the ground with a blow to his side.
"My prince-
"You yield!?" he exclaims to him in his madness, bringing the point of his sword to his throat.
"Yes! I yield!"
"Just like that!? So easy!?"
"Prince Aemond!"
He hears someone shout in the distance but he focuses entirely on Ronan below him.
"I yield!"
"He's bleeding!"
"My prince!" comes Criston Cole immediately.
And only at that moment does Aemond stop, breathing shakily, his gaze with barely contained fury. And only at that moment he also notices that Ronan has a wound on his shoulder with which he had brushed his sword earlier, not realizing at the time that he had wounded him.
Ronan presses his free hand to the wound, trying to stop the bleeding, watching him in horror and clearly calling for help.
Aemond squeezes his sword again so hard that it marks his white knuckles, watching everyone around him for a moment, then with a hard stare, turning to him again, angling his body so that only he can hear him.
"You are not worthy of her," he whispers in a low voice, his words laden with disdain and resentment.
And without caring about the stares or even her opponent's injury, he leaves the shield on the ground and with his sword in hand heads towards the interior of the Red Keep's castle.
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Aemond knew that eventually what happened at the training yard would reach your ears. He also expected a confrontation about it, but he didn't imagine he would face your fury late at night.
His guards are required to stand guard in different hallways, so taking advantage of the fact that there are none in the hallway by his doors, you quickly make your way there to enter his chamber as fast as your body will allow.
He looks up from his book in his lap, sitting near the fireplace, watching you attentively at once, but before he can say anything, you turn to him with your lips pressed together and annoyance in your eyes.
"Have you lost your mind?" you inquire in a serious and demanding tone, looking for explanations.
And just like you, Aemond isn't having your attitude either. He's annoyed to see how you haven't taken any time at all to come to the defense of that stupid, poor, defenseless boy.
Putting his book aside, he stands up, imposing his presence on you. Despite having to raise your face to face him directly, you don't let his posture intimidate you.
"I see that that... Ronan matters too much to you, my Lady," he says in a dismissive tone, "It took you no time at all to fall for his sure sweet words and promises of love. After all, you and he are very much alike."
You inhale deeply before responding, seeking calm despite his attitude and the tone of his words.
"Ronan and I are getting to know each other, nothing more. Just as you are getting to know Floris Baratheon. But I'm not doing anything against you, yours is for sure, she's going to be your wife. But you can't go hurting and almost killing the men who can be my future husband."
He looks away from yours for a moment, irritated.
"I don't know what you expected, honestly," he tells you seriously and indifferently, "That's what happens in combat when we fight with weapons, Y/N, men get hurt. And if Ronan is weak and wasn't taught well, that's not my problem."
You stand your ground, incredulous to hear his words.
"That doesn't justify what you did. Everyone witnessed how the combat began and it was you who unfairly exploded against him, hurting him," you reproach him with determination. "His wound was deep. He needed eight stitches!"
Aemond, sick of this, averts his gaze from yours and turns his back on you, heading towards his table to pour himself a glass of wine under your confused and incredulous gaze.
"I don't understand why you're so worried, he'll be fine. After all, you still have another possible candidate for your hand, I hear," he says in a tone devoid of emotion, laden with bitterness, "Though I doubt he's much stronger than Ronan."
His voice sounds harsh, his words laden with a bitter resentment that he can barely hide, jealous.
"So this is how things will be?"
You ask him earnestly and sadly, fighting back tears that threaten to escape at any moment.
"You'll go around hurting my suitors until there are none left and I have no chance of marrying anyone else but not you either?"
Tension hangs in the air as you wait for his response, feeling the weight of your words and the clash of emotions between the two of you.
And he remains silent, staring out the window with a hard stare, as if not looking for an answer through the glass, turning his back to you and not daring to look at you at that moment.
Finally the first tear rolls down your cheek and Aemond listens as you gently sniffle your nose, then turns to you, his face showing a mixture of emotions, from hardness to the flash of regret and longing.
And he lets out a defeated sigh.
"That's not what this is about, Y/N," he murmurs in a softer tone, his expression revealing his inner struggle, "They're not worthy of you. Your father is choosing wrong."
And that's when you explode with anger and frustration, unable to contain yourself any longer.
"I just don't understand why you care so much, Aemond!" you exclaim without understanding, "You shouldn't see them as a threat because they are not. You have nothing to do here!"
You face him, as your tears fall silently, with a defiant look and your posture firm, though full of sadness, anguish and confusion, inside and outside. And he too responds to you in kind.
"Of course I do!" he turns to you angrily, exclaiming in his fury, "This does concern me because those fucking men and your father are going to take you away from me! And they have no right!"
And again your emotions boil over, fury and pain getting the best of you.
"Do you even listen to yourself? How irrational you are being?" you inquire, not understanding, "You didn't even do anything in the beginning, you are the prince, the one who had the power to do something about it and you never even once asked for my hand!" you shout at him, your voice full of reproach, sadness and disappointment.
Furious, Aemond turns around and in a burst of anger, throws his hand towards the table, causing the wine jar and the cups to fall to the floor with a deafening clatter. The sudden sound makes you jump and recoil, startled by the noise and force of the act.
He turns his back and heads for the back of his chair, leaning hard against it as he tries to contain his fury. With her breathing rapid and agitated he struggles to regain his composure, his body tensing and closing his eye tightly.
The air becomes tense and the silence uncomfortable, as Aemond fights against himself and you just allow yourself to cry silently.
When he speaks again, with a tinge of bitterness in his gaze, still not turning to look at you and his voice soft but laden with resignation, still holding back his fury.
"I wanted to," he confesses to you, his vulnerability visible, "But my mother and grandsire would never have approved, you know that."
His statement leaves you speechless, with a mixture of sadness and disappointment that he didn't even try, not once and yet...he has the nerve to do this to you.
You remain silent and the disappointment and bitterness reflect even more on your face as the tears run their course, to finally gather your courage and speak.
"Then... let me go," you whisper, it being more of a painful plea than a command.
Silence expands in the room, marking every second with the heaviness of unresolved emotions. And you, overwhelmed with disappointment and pain, understand that you have nothing more to do here and turn to leave.
You don't even care if one of the guards sees you coming out of his chamber, you don't even care if rumors arise seeing you here late at night and everything gets too complicated, you just need to get out of here soon.
And with tears still running down your cheeks and being completely heartbroken, you grab the doorknob. But just as you are about to turn it, his firm and determined hand lands on your waist and turns you towards him, stopping you.
The action takes you by surprise and you look at him without understanding, he doesn't give you time to say anything either as he places one hand on your cheek and the other keeps it firmly on your waist, bringing his body close to yours.
And still without reacting, he moves closer, his warm breath brushing against your face.
"I can't," he murmurs, his voice cracking with anguish, laden with longing and regret, "I can't," he repeats in a whisper, gently caressing your cheek, "I'm sorry."
And just then, without a thought for anyone else and without a care in the world, his lips trap yours in a passionate, desperate kiss.
Paralyzed, surprise takes you completely and you can only feel how every movement of his lips is a mixture of apology and desire, asking you to kiss him back.
His arms wrap firmly around you, clinging to you as if he's going to lose you at any moment. And unable to resist a second longer, with his soft lips and warm mouth on top of yours, he makes the world fade away around you in that instant and you kiss him back.
You place your arms around his neck and cling to him completely, moving your lips in sync with his, as he presses your body against his and lets out a gasp at the wonderful feeling of having you this way with him.
And you feel as if you are floating, this being exactly what you had dreamed and prayed for so much, wishing and praying to the Gods that this is not also one of your cruel dreams.
But this is real. It is finally happening.
So you allow yourself to lose yourself completely in it, not thinking about the consequences and not caring about anything else, as Aemond walks you around without stopping kissing you for a single moment, until his feet touch the edge of his bed.
"I love you. I love you so much, my sweet girl."
He whispers into your lips, watching you with all that love and desire in his gaze, noticing your swollen and parted lips, watching him back with the same intensity and completely surprised to hear his words.
And without saying anything back, with the actions speaking for themselves, you kiss him again, feeling that urge to cry, but of happiness.
Aemond falls down sitting on the edge of his bed and you take a seat on his lap, placing your knees on either side of his hips, clinging to his neck and kissing him slow, deep, making you feel everything.
"I love you too," you murmur against his lips, watching him with nothing but affection and desire.
He kisses you again desperately, feeling something warm in his chest at your words, holding your waist with one of his hands and the other beginning to lift the edges of your skirt, making his way to touch your bare thigh.
You gasp into his lips, feeling his warm hand and the cool metal of his rings, only to tilt your head as he begins to leave soft, wet kisses down your neck, trying to find your sensitive spot to make you shiver.
"You're so beautiful," he murmurs, leaving a kiss on your collarbone, lifting his gaze to you.
"A-aemond," you gasp, feeling the hardness beneath you.
You reach up with one of your hands and remove his eye patch, wanting to see everything about him, instantly reflecting the faint light of his blue sapphire, looking so beautiful and dazzling.
You smile softly at the sight of him, then leave a soft kiss on his cheek, beginning to leave a small trail down his face to kiss him on the lips, as his hand on your thigh makes gentle, firm strokes on your skin.
Slowly, he lifts his hand from your waist to the laces of your dress, watching you attentively afterwards and needing first of all your permission. And you help him untie the knots yourself.
Your front of the dress loosens and revealing your white gown underneath, Aemond lifts one of his hands and gently traces your skin between the valley of your breasts, making you shudder and shiver, then stops at the straps, watching you again.
"May I?"
With the blush on your cheeks and the nerves in your lower abdomen, really wanting to do this, you nod.
"Yes."
His hand slowly slides the strap down your shoulder and arm, then exposes your breasts to him, making you feel more nervous, but you feel completely safe to be doing this with him.
Truly everything that happens next, giving him your mainhead and letting his calloused hands explore all over your naked body, is by choice and you think to yourself that if there is one man you would willingly trust with this, it's him.
And just as the tip of his hot, hard, heavy cock makes its way between your walls, he knows exactly how to comfort you and make you feel comfortable. Instantly blood stains his sheets, but he doesn't care at all.
And when he begins to move inside you, slowly and very carefully, waiting for you to get used to it, he wipes away every tear that escapes your eyes and comforts you with his hands and kisses, making sure that at all times you are well.
"You feel so fucking good, so warm and tight, my love."
And despite his obscene words, his actions are anything but, his movements careful and careful not to hurt you, asking you how you feel.
He kisses you sweetly and caresses your breasts, he makes sure to pleasure you too, as he understands that this is not just about him and the act is not just about fucking, but him making love to you.
He growls into your lips and you gasp as he begins to move with more purpose inside you, feeling the sweat all over your body and forehead, clinging to his shoulders and gently digging your nails into his skin also lightly illuminated by sweat.
"Do you have any idea how long I imagine this?" he whispers against your lips, moving his hips and pounding that sweet spot inside you, making you moan beneath him.
But he quiets your moans with his lips, not wanting anyone out there to hear you, it would be too risky.
"Aemond," you say his name in a moan, biting your lips.
"What's wrong, my sweet girl? Does it hurt?" he says to start moving more gently.
"N-no. It just... feels so good," you manage to say over the sensual movement of his hips that make you see stars behind your eyes.
The act doesn't last long and very soon Aemond makes you reach your highest point, making you experience a sensation you had no idea about all over your body and he also spills all his seed inside you, grunting and moaning from the pleasure as he feels your walls squeezing him deliciously.
And then, both of you sweaty and trying to catch your breath, you embrace and take a moment in his bed.
You feel a tingle between your legs that is more than gratifying and Aemond, for the first time in a long time, feels at peace and completely at ease, especially having you in his arms at this moment.
There was no time for regrets and worries, it was all done. So the two of you dive into that little world where only the two of you exist.
But even though you didn't want to think about it, you think about the future, with uncertainty beginning to invade you, as you inhale Aemond's scent, hiding your face between his neck and chest, embracing him as he encloses you in his arms and gently caresses your bare shoulder with his thumb, listening to his soft breathing above you.
You let out a sigh, close your eyes and wish you could stay like this forever, starting to feel your eyes water and that huge worry in your chest for what you just did.
When Aemond speaks.
"In the morrow I will talk to your father and ask for your hand."
He says in a soft voice and everything in you comes to a complete standstill, listening to him attentively.
"I'm sure he won't be able to resist my proposal. No one will be able to stop us when they know I have claimed your mainhead, not even my mother and grandsire. And then... we will have our Valyrian wedding and there will be no turning back," he murmurs and then places a soft smile on his lips, "You will be mine, as much as you already are now."
You feel him leave a soft kiss in your hair and you smile softly, moving closer towards him, if possible.
"Sounds like an excellent plan, my love," you whisper, grateful.
And finally you can be at peace now.
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winterrrnight · 8 months
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“here we are again” — new beginnings chapter II
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PAIRING: stepdad!soft!rafe x mom!reader
WARNINGS: none!
EDITH SPEAKS: hello mls! I hope you enjoy reading this chapter <3 just a lil note: updates will get a bit sporadic for the upcoming week or so because I have some big things coming up which unfortunately require more attention than my silly little fics :( I greatly apologise for that, but let me tell you once I'm free I'll have great fics awaiting you all!!
please like and reblog if you enjoyed reading and don't hesitate to let me know any of your thoughts 💕💕
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You let out a huge sigh as you lean back in your chair and close your eyes shut. You’ve been trying to find a good preschool for Sage, after you had to pull her out of the one she was earlier in because their fees increased exponentially, and unfortunately you haven’t been earning enough to support Sage going to such an expensive school.
“Mamma mamma!” You hear her call you out from a different room. Her footsteps are audible as she comes running to you, basically banging the floor with her feet.
“Mamma!” She says, smiling wide, standing next to the front legs of your chair and tugging on your pants. You look down at her and plaster a big smile on your face, picking her up and placing her on your lap.
“Yes baby?” You coo, leaning to press a kiss on her soft cheek, which is tinted a light pink.
“I made something for you! You have to see it now,” she says, now tugging on your crewneck. You get up from your chair, Sage on your hip as you go to the room she was just in.
You set her down on the floor, and she picks up a folded paper. “Here,” she grins, and you take the paper from her.
You unfold it and you see a drawing of you, her, and one strange man standing next to the two of you. She’s colored in the drawings, her colors going out of her drawn lines, assuming their own directions, but nevertheless, you can’t help but grin wide at the present.
“Sage baby,” you get on your knees in front of her, “this is so cute! You’re my talented little kiddo, aren’t you?” You smile, tickling her sides. She laughs and squirms to get away from you, her little hands trying to swat you away.
“But who is that?” You ask, pointing at the drawing of the strange man.
“Fafe!” She yells excitedly.
“Fafe? Who’s ‘Fafe’ baby?”
“We met him, at the, at the store! He was big, veryyy big!”
And suddenly it strikes you. The handsome, handsome man who you met at the grocery store. It’s been around a week since that day and you had nearly forgotten about him.
Nearly.
Until this exact moment.
Now everything comes back to you; the exact moment you saw him, your eyes sinking into his, your heart beating so loud it might as well jump out of your chest.
“I remember him baby, why did you draw him?”
“Because, because he was very nice to me,” she says, her hands at her back as she’s swaying side to side in her position.
You aren’t sure what to reply to her with. She drew a man you met and didn’t even talk for more than five minutes on a random Tuesday, and showed you three being a family.
Dad, mom, and Sage. A family.
Is she expecting you two to just get married to him? To bring him in your house this quick?
But, at the end of the day, she’s a four year old little girl, with a wild imagination, and a desire to have a father figure in her life.
You’ve tried your level best to never let Sage feel the lack of a father in her life, but you always knew deep in your heart that one day, she will wonder why she only has a single parent, and why can’t she have two parents like all her friends. But you never expected this day to come so early.
You shake your head and come back to reality, and let a smile pull onto your lips. “I’ll hang this on the fridge next to all your other art,” you tell her, and she jumps up and down with excitement. You make your way to your kitchen, your daughter on your heels as she’s giggling, and you pin her drawing up with a magnet next to the rest. You take a step back to admire the splash of colors on your fridge door, your heart feeling content.
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You smooth out the wrinkles in her dress, and tie the bow of her dress tightly. Sage is especially giggly today, your hands roaming over her little body which constantly creates a tickling sensation on her skin.
“Mamma, where are we going?” She asks you, carefully pocketing a candy you gave her. You pick her up and take her to your kitchen island, settling her in her chair to hand her her cereal.
“We’re going to a new school baby,” you say, pouring milk into her bowl and mixing it well with her fruit loops.
“But, I love home,” she puts, her eyes big and wide, and you know she’s trying her best to convince you to stay at home by putting on a puppy dog face.
“You know that face doesn’t work on me,” you smile, sitting next to her, and gently smoothing a hand over her hair. She only giggles as her answer and you pick up her spoon, and start to feed her. Even though she knows how to eat on her own, you’re worried she might get messy and spill the milk on her dress.
You were worried she might not like the idea of going to a new school. She really liked the previous one, but you knew you couldn’t keep her in there for long. But here she is sitting next to you, eating her cereal as excitedly as if you’re about to go to an amusement park.
Once she’s done eating, you both leave for the school. This one also happens to be closer to your home than the last one, so you're quick to reach there. You help Sage get out of the car, her light bag hanging on her shoulders and her hand securely in yours, as you lead her to the main doors of the school.
When you go inside, the receptionist leads you to the classroom Sage has been assigned to. A few children are sitting on the floor of the classroom, empty white sheets spread around them along with unopened boxes of paint.
You hear Sage audibly gasp as she notices all the art supplies, her eyes shining with a desire to create art. You look around the classroom to spot a teacher, but there’s no one to be seen.
You decide to maybe talk to the receptionist once again; maybe she’s making a mistake? You leave Sage in the classroom and turn around, and almost in the next fraction of the second you bang into a broad chest.
“Oh gosh I’m so sorry!” You grunt, your eyes closed from the impact. You run a hand over your forehead, feeling a slight pain from your collision into the broad and muscular chest.
You finally open your eyes, and you see the last person you would expect to be here.
“Rafe?”
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what do you all think Rafe is doing there? 🤭
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bambisnc · 3 months
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killing me softly [ft. p.hn]
-> recap : but when you call hanni a little later, you’re met with an automated response. the number you have dialed is currently busy. please try again.
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pairing : bsf!hanni x f!reader genre : angst uwu cw/tw : THERES A LOT OF MISUNDERSTANDINGS JUSTICE FOR MY BBG MOKA + swearing + uneditted + hints of reader being possessive/jealous + surprise iroha/moka/nwjns members appearance! <3 wc : 0.7k
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over the days following the new girl incident as your friend group refers to it, you’ve found yours and hanni’s relationship having … become a little strange. 
maybe it’s just that you don’t reach out to her as often; texting her only when absolutely necessary and spending recess holed up in your own classroom instead of near the school roof where the two of you used to meet earlier.
obviously you do realize how your actions can somewhat be compared to a stereotypical toxic manhwa boyfriend. 
but does that mean you’ll try to be better?
no.
it isn’t too much to expect her to be the one to approach you, right?
granted it’s not like she’s stopped trying to hang out completely (it’s more you who’s been rejecting her ideas..) but the little time you spent with her at school is now being taken up by her. moka.
the last you remember having visited her class, she greeted you with a signature, disarming hanni smile. 
“y/n! i’ve been meaning to go to your section – um, moka actually needed a lab coat for chemistry; you know how strict professor bae is… so could you-”
“yeah sure,” you had replied back with all the ease in the world, “drop by whenever. i’ll need it by 7th period though so..”
moka had held out 2 thumbs up towards you then, “of course! i’ll make sure to give it back to you by then!”
she, in fact, did not give it back to you by then.
“you’re so lucky i had my old one in my locker…” minji reprimands you, “what were you thinking when you just gave yours away?? yeah sure professor bae may be strict; but he’d never have said a thing to a new student.
you, on the other hand, very well would end up DEAD if he caught you without one. Again.”
really, how could you even defend your decision? the one time you remembered to bring your own lab coat, you decided to let someone borrow it, who, coincidentally ended up never getting it back to you.
more importantly, this only farther distanced you and hanni. 
she still texts you of course, but you have noticed how less frequent the ping! of the notification sound you set for her has become.
-
then one lunch break, she shows up. right outside your classroom. 
you go out to meet her, of course, but you make sure to drag minji out with you .. for emotional support.
but the second she sees kang haerin she’s quick to slip away shouting out a “best of luck btw! <3”
oh she’s so in for it later.
“y/n! how was your biology test today?” 
you respond to hanni as neutrally as you possibly can because at that moment you can only think about how neither of them have yet returned your lab coat.
“… hey.” she takes one of your hands into her own, “is everything okay? um. do you want to tag along with me to the cafeteria?”
you huff out a laugh, “have you just met me hanni?” because she knows how much you don’t like the cafeteria. 
she’s silent for a little. 
“yeah. 
it feels like i have just met you y/n...”
you pull away your hand from hers and stand with your back pressed against the wall.
a fresh sound of pleasant chatters brings you back to reality. 
minji’s here! praise all the gods. 
as she and the others she’s brought with her, haerin, danielle and hyein, entangle both of you into conversation, you find yourself sliding down until you’re sat down on the cold floor.
you close your eyes letting the harsh sunlight wash over your skin. 
.. something knocks against your arm, then. and there’s a sudden rush of cool air.
opening your eyes shows you none other than hanni, sitting next to you, fanning you with her (chemistry) notebook. 
when your eyes meet hers, both of you burst into peals of laughter. 
-
you walk hanni back to her class when the bell signaling the end of your time together (recess) rings. 
moka and … iroha? greet her at right at the door. 
“hanniii,” iroha says, throwing an arm around your best friend’s shoulder, “i can’t believe you left your ~girlfriend~ moka here all alone… she’s been pining after you for ages now~”
you quietly slip out before you can hear her response.
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notes : um so u guys best be praying for me and bsf to work things out or else no happy endinf 🤷🤷 + [m.list] song rec : te quiero - kissoflife again yes <3
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𐙚 . regulars : none yet! ⋆
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