#portrayed and B) often distracted/into other things too

[ectonurites]

happy valentines day y'all

[26labrd]

What do you think of Jamie Bell's version of Tintin in the 2011 movie? I personally find Jamie's delievery of his lines and the facial expressions he makes to be satisfying and attractive so I love it. However, I do recognize some differences in the way movie Tintin acts compared to the comic version.

In the comics Tintin has an easygoing personality and is rarely annoyed. He's very patient yknow. While the movie Tintin looks very done with everyone lol. He's patient too, except that it's the bitch-im-this-close-to-snap kind of patience lol. I don't have a problem with it, I think it adds great comedy, plus it's a realistic & relatable reaction considering how the guy is surrounded by airheaded/distracted characters.

They got his curiosity/obsession and quick-thinking and some other tiny personality details right though. The movie Tintin doesn't feel far away from the original one, it just seems less "childish" and more relatable? Movie Tintin feels 25+ years old to me, meanwhile comic Tintin feels 15-20 years old because of how happy/energetic and "unbothered" he seems with many problems? (Although I think Tintin being 25+ makes more sense even though I know Herge thinks of him as 16-17, smth like that)

A scene I can think of where Jamie's Tintin acted so much like the comic version was when the captain asked him how much he knew about the unicorn and he replied with "Not a lot, that's why I'm asking you" he looked & sounded so cute and very comic Tintin-ish imo.

All in all I love Jamie's Tintin and ngl watching him makes me feel butterflies lol. But I can't help compare him to the comic Tintin and be reminded of their differences. I wonder if that's because of the script or just Jamie's way of portraying him?

Anyways, I wanted to know what you think. Maybe you can write a comparison post about Jamie Bell and Jean Pierre's portrayals of Tintin? Not like a "this one is better" comparison, just an analysis. Yeah just a suggestion.

Thanks for reading this far and I'm excited to read your thoughts on this topic!

sorry it took a little while for me to answer this! it was hard to organize my thoughts – which, it turns out, i have a lot of, so i’m putting this under a cut.

overall, i liked his performance, yeah! i think he’s a fine tintin. i think they did some things really well with him, like his curiosity and drive, as you mentioned, as well as his confidence and self-assuredness (the scene that comes to mind for these is the “we’ve got one bullet” scene). i know jamie bell is a dancer, too, which helped him nail the physical aspects of playing the character.

as for the differences, i think the main ones you listed – his impatience, annoyance, and less easygoing nature – just have to do with the stories they chose to adapt. in crab with the golden claws, tintin is indeed often shown losing his patience with the captain; in unicorn he gets cranky when barnaby and sakharine don’t stop pestering him, and when the woman hogs the phone booth in the rain. it wouldn’t be my personal go-to for a tintin portrayal to have these traits so forefront, but it provides more depth to his character/gives him more of a personality and makes him more well-rounded.

bc like. tintin in the comics is kind of bland LOL. which i'm pretty sure was mostly by design. we see him develop and gain more of a personality as the series progresses but for a lot of it he is kind of left blank. so the script writers had to fill in these gaps and round out the character in order to make the sort of protagonist that could carry a feature-length film. and i think they did a decent job! generally i think movie-tintin’s traits make sense and feel like a natural progression of the comics character. he is still recognizable as tintin, but just an older and more grown-up version of his comics counterpart, like you said.

that being said . there is just something about this version of tintin that is just a little bit off. and i cannot put my finger on it. this section will be more incoherent because i'm really struggling to put it into words lol. but he just doesn’t Feel like tintin to me... like. i think he’s a little too serious tbh . i wish they had let him get a little playful with it, but tonally i dont think it would have worked. and i think there’s just a lightness and a warmth that’s missing from this portrayal. not that i wanted him to be happy all the time or whatever, but he feels closed off in a way that tintin never has to me, so it feels just a little off to see him portrayed like this. like there’s a difference between closed off and reserved, and i think movie-tintin is closed off, whereas comics-tintin is just reserved. i don’t know if that makes any sense. at this point i'm just going off vibe rather than anything concrete that i can cite lol im sorry this is so nebulous

AND HONESTLY i think for me it also has to do with the fact that they made him do that posh english accent 😭😭😭 it just feels so wrong to me. like maybe i'm just too used to hearing him with a canadian accent (shoutout to the 90s cartoon) but. yeah. and i know that’s not jamie bell’s natural accent either, so it feels doubly weird

all this to say yes, i do like jamie bell as tintin and i think he did a wonderful job, and i think that this version of tintin makes sense, even though he doesn’t quite fully Feel like tintin to me

i don’t know that i'll write a comparison post, just because it seems kind of daunting and because i'm not super confident in my grasp of tintin as a character. which i know is ironic to say, given that i just wrote a bunch about tintin as a character, but this post is largely just opinion, and for something as “official” as a comparison analysis i’d definitely have to go back and reread/rewatch to be able to say anything with any confidence. it's certainly something i'd like to do at some point! i have a lot of thoughts about jean-pierre’s tintin as well and would love any excuse to talk about him. (spoiler alert: i think jean-pierre feels like tintin way more)

but anyway, thanks for your question!

[roleplaycharacter1shots]

character profile - Flynn Ryder {invisible}

G E N E R A L   I N F O R M A T I O N Name: Flynn Octavian Ryder Nickname: N/A Gender: Male Birthplace: London, England Birthdate: August 29 Age: 38 Current Residence: London, England Employer: Ministry of Magic, Department of Magical Law Enforcement Occupation: Auror Blood: Pureblood

A P P E A R A N C E Height: 6’ 0 Hair: Dirty blonde Eyes: Sea green Dominant Hand: Right Other: Possesses a faint beard

Playby: William Moseley

B I O G R A P H I C A L I N F O R M A T I O N (At age 22)

Flynn Rider is your typical little geeky photographer; the slow kid on the school field trips who always lagged behind, ogling at the statues with his old fashioned Polaroid Muggle camera clasped tightly to his chest. He was the one who always got what everyone called "lost;" but to Flynn, he was only on an adventure.

Ever since he was little, Flynn was often told that he had a wild imagination. But even as he got older, Flynn never admitted that to himself; instead, he claimed that he just saw everything else differently. He saw stories emerging from even the smallest of things just by gazing at them, and he wanted to capture the emotion and feeling in everything that he saw so that others could see what he did. When he went to Hogwarts, he was in Hufflepuff House, and even there was sometimes picked on for his rather dreamy and creative nature.

Sort of clumsy since he takes so much time surveying his surroundings, Flynn is always paying attention to detail; that is, stuff that attracts his attention enough to photograph it. So he is also easily distracted; so much that he sometimes loses focus on what's more important. His hobby has taken over his life, so to speak; and now he is a wanderer, traveling the world ever since he had left Hogwarts. He takes up odd jobs here and there, and has never stayed in the same place twice, save his hometown in London.

Flynn needs to be grounded for sure. He is a lost soul, unknowingly trying to find himself and his purpose. He always subconsciously thought that finding beauty in other things would help him find his own.

(Sixteen years later…)

Just after he turned 22, Flynn Ryder's true tale was revealed. Instead of a halfblood as he always portrayed himself to be, Flynn is actually a pureblood. Truly from London, he did not grow up in a poorer household as many would imagine. In fact, it was quite the opposite: his family is rich and rather powerful, his father in charge of the Auror department of the Ministry. He runs the place, making sure that criminals are found and locked up where they belong. No one has ever been on the run and free for too long.

Except Flynn.

His father, John Ryder, is actually his step-father. His mother, Amelia, married him a few years after her husband was killed at the Battle of Hogwarts. Flynn was young, but he remembers how much his mother changed upon marrying him. She no longer is bubbly and happy; instead, she worried over him and everyone wanted him to become a great Auror like John. His biological father had been not quite as heroic as John, having loved the beauty of the forest and nature (a trait that Amelia clearly saw in Flynn). Amelia wanted him to be successful in life, and that stress was what changed her the most.

Flynn immersed himself in the Muggle writings, finding Shakespeare one of many who seemed to have beauty woven in his words. He tried to create poetry and the like, but found in the end that photography was where his strengths were, as well as the ability to discover more natural, almost rarer beauty. It had taken him several years to learn that; not until he was thirteen and his mother was "happily" married to John.

To make a long story short, Flynn and John never seem to meet eye-to-eye. John saw Flynn as "unruly" and "delicate," almost like the stereotypical rich, spoiled boy. And it was that notion that brought him down the most. Practically shoved into the Ministry to try and prove himself, Flynn took his job at the Daily Prophet where he struggled greatly with the time pressures and ridicule. The other reporters often mocked his pictures, making fun of the time he spent taking each one. He became nothing more than the spoiled rich kid who was only in it because his "father" had the power to make it so.

Flynn hated the prejudice he endured. He wanted independence, to find himself, and to show the world how much his photography meant to him and could mean to others. Most of all, he wanted to show that he could do anything on his own, without the help of money, status, or anyone else. At seventeen years old, fresh out of Hogwarts and only two months into his Prophet job, Flynn just… vanished.

No one could find him. Not even John's Aurors. Flynn knows all of the tricks that can help him get by without being caught, choosing more Muggle methods than wizardry ones: not filling everything out on applications, spending barely enough time in a place to really associate with anyone, only occasionally using magic, never using Floo Powder, he altered his last name slightly, and rarely Apparated. Walking was his main mode of transportation, and areas barren of people are his favorite locations.

Once did he return to the little country house that he had once grown up in before his mother's second marriage; and in the process, he was nearly caught. He knew that John and Amelia were still hunting for him. He knew what would happen when he will return: the Ryders would celebrate and then he would be married to the daughter of a friend. And that was exactly what happened when he was captured. Stuck back in the life he loathes, Flynn is married to Catherine and they have a sixteen year old son named Harmon.

His wealthy background has allowed him to pick up languages rather easily; but his poorer days still allow clumsiness, lack of arrogance, and absence of certain manners to pull through.

C O N N E C T I O N S Marriage: Catherine Ryder Children: Harmon Ryder, Louis Boutin Romance: Eva Boutin…? Tension: Eva Boutin, Louis Boutin, Catherine Ryder, John & Amelia Ryder

O T H E R T H I N G S Education: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Hufflepuff House Wand: Reed, ten inches, unicorn hair Sexuality: Straight Spoken Languages: English, tiny bit of French Likes: Taking pictures of beautiful things, spending time with Harmon Dislikes: Being an Auror Song: Invisible Man - Theory of a Deadman

[aclosetfan]

the pet peeve/pettiest opinion i have abt this fandom is how sometimes ppl portray the blues w/o any substance and/or any sort of depth like they do the greens and reds🤝

I don’t even think this is petty, it’s just true 🤷‍♀️ it seriously irks me to no end. I’m so glad you brought this up!!! lmaooo short response is I 100% agree with you.  unfortunately, I agree with you so much I wrote a whole freaking essay, which can be found under the cut. I could rant about this all day long. I don’t even care. The blues are such a disappointing couple :( I wish fic writers would cut out the cutesy pure bs that you find so often with these two.

I really think that the biggest problem with the blues (and Boomer) is all rooted in Bubbles’ characterization. I think she’s the most difficult for people to write because she’s the least “problematic.” And a lot of people don’t know what to do with her because no one can relate to unproblematic. She’s written as (excuse the annoying early 2010s expression, but it fits) the perfect cinnamon bun and there’s no conflict if a character doesn’t have some kind of internal conflict, they’re boring! They get tossed to the side!! Blossom is often written struggling with leadership and perfectionism. Buttercup is often written struggling with impulsiveness and aggression. People relate to them because they’ve “gone through things” most people have experienced themselves. Fic writers like writing Bloss and BC for the same reason because you can only write what you know! But shoot, writers still got to place Bubbles in somehow! So she’s either an airhead, or a crybaby, or too innocent/naïve, or the uwu character, which is good for a few laughs but 🤷‍♀️ it gets pretty 2D and old real quick. Her biggest issue in the show was people babying her, but usually, that conflict is written off in fics with one simple “OH so she’s actually a badass” scene and that’s like it?? It’s never visited again?? (Even though all her solo episodes focus on her accepting who she is despite what others think so idk if badass scenes actually do her justice. She’s a lover not a fighter at the end of the day tbh.) It’s understandable though. I struggle with Bubbles because I’m not as optimistic as her character, and I certainly don’t relate to being “the joy and laughter.” It’s hard writing someone whose fanon character is interpreted as practically flawless. In ppg fics you’re also juggling a big group of characters, so it’s advantageous to rely on the simpler archetype tropes. So, I think it’s easier for people to set Bubbles up in a relationship than explore her more thoroughly since she’s the sensitive one who would be into the lovey-dovey stuff. Further, if you want to give readers a break from the heavier themes of your main plot, having a cute side pairing is a good safe escape. Not a lot of thought is needed to make those relationships work. And since Boomer’s just there and also underdeveloped, they get paired together. And because people (rightly) want to stray from the predator/prey trope because Bubbles is just so Pure(tm) and the trope feels assault-y, writers make Boomer inherently good. But now you’re just stuck with two good, cute characters. That’s it. And because their plot in the story revolves around their romantic relationship, it's their relationship that is the only thing that aids in their character development. The blues make up the lighthearted B-plot (but probably more like C-plot because the greens are usually B-plot material) The blues seem to follow two tropes: 1. Pure childhood crushes—Boomer was always good and wants to do good by Bubbles and she wants to “protect” him from his “mean” brothers 2. Bubbles “fixes” Boomer, but he really doesn’t need any fixing in the first place because he was good all along, he just needed encouragement. (Weird side note, have you noticed how Bubbles is always like “Boomie you’re NOT stupid” and then all the sudden it’s like the boy has a PhD) And I'm not faulting anyone for having a b-plot relationship with the blues. If it’s done right, being in a relationship does wonders for people! But relationships are work and without the blues having their personalities developed OUTSIDE the relationship, there’s no “work” to be done. They’re just the Perfect Couple and it’s boring. Don’t get me wrong, I like the pairing (it’s v cute), but what’s nice about the greens and the reds is that each individual character has usually been personalized (Butch not so much, in my opinion, his character generally revolves around BC, but bear with me for argument's sake), which makes their relationships with other characters fun to read. The greens and the reds are flushed out because their most basic archetypes are the most relatable and easiest to write. The Blues, though, just seem to get together. Bubbles is a hard character to write, so by default, so is Boomer. They have no conflict outside each other that would trigger character development. They flirt, sometimes Bubbles resists, then they’re together. She’s the cutest thing ever and he’s a simp for it. Easy, fluffy, they fade to the background because now that they’re together what happens to them next?? Irl people either get married or they break up. Most of these fics are high school AUs, so they can’t get married, and no one wants the cute ones to break up, so they just start to enter and exit the story as convenient segues. And that’s disappointing because individually they could be so interesting. Bubbles has to struggle with the fact that people infantize her. Her ideas are often dismissed, people treat her like a ditz, and her ability to be a hero is often called into question because she’s the one who seeks peaceful alternatives, and when she DOESNT seek those alternatives, people in the show freak out and become scared. Like I said before, most bubbles centric episodes focus on her accepting her sensitive side and using it to overcome a conflict. Also, HIM’s like her main villain in all her episodes. and, shit, one of her nicknames is literally Chubbles. She’s been called fat a few times. There’s so much a writer can do with her conflict-wise. Optimism and sensitivity don’t equal naivety, we don’t have to make her Pure. In fact, it’d be way more fun to see her trying to show everyone that she’s no longer a child but a young woman. And Boomer has like 3 episodes, right? Maybe 4? Literally in all of them, he’s a bratty little boy. He carries slugs in his pockets. He’s bad at trash talking. Easily distracted. Fights with his brothers. Dumb and chaotic. Good at spitting. He doesn’t put Bubbles on a pedestal. He wants to beat her up. He’s not a good guy. Bubbles thinks he’s cute. That’s literally all we know about him lmao. He wouldn’t be soft so why would what we know translate into a boring unproblematic underdeveloped boy?? You can write him unfulfilled. You could write him stuck in his brothers’ shadows. You could write him as a weirdo who’s obsessed with bugs (to match bubbles animal obsession). In my head, if Brick’s the smart one and Butch is the strong one, I make Boomer the charming one. And charming boys are dangerous boys 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️he probably had to charm his way out of plenty of dumb situations. I also make him unluckily lucky since he gets captured by the girls in one episode, but he still makes it out just fine. Everything bad that could happen happens to him but Boomer’s like “eh 🤷‍♀️ It’ll blow over. Lol already died once. What can ya do?” So you've got a girl who is never taken seriously and a boy who takes nothing seriously and yall really think their relationship would be unproblematic??? Individually, these two characters could be fun to write if the fic author plans it out correctly! Idk why their relationship wouldn't be either. If you want a compelling romance, you’ve got to make compelling characters. 

[soldouthaz]

hi!!! love your blog! i don't know if you're taking fic rec requests right now, but if you are, do you have any fics with subspace and aftercare that's written and not just referenced? it's my favorite part of smut but not written nearly enough :// anyways tysm for everything you do/write for this fandom!

hi!!!! okay okay so this is probably my all time absolute favorite things in fic so I'm so happy you asked! unfortunately it’s not something that’s often covered in depth, but I'll try to rec you some of my faves! 

as always, I'll mark the specifications next to the titles so feel free to just pay attention to the ones that suit your interests and disregard the others! also due to the general nature of subspace/aftercare, please be sure to check the tags and warnings on each fic before reading! :) 

something in the world today (e, 48k, b!L) by @crazyupsetter / whoknows

It shouldn’t be a surprise, the first time that Louis drops to his knees in front of Harry. It shouldn’t be, because it’s been something that Louis has needed for a long time. It shouldn’t be, because he’s been crawling out of his skin for weeks on end. It shouldn’t be, because Harry always makes him feel better. It shouldn’t be, because he’s needed this even when he didn’t know that he needed it.

Somehow, it still is.

when I need you, I need it quickly (e, 185k, b!L) by marvelous_things

the daddy!kink dom/sub au nobody asked for.

just breathe (e, 50k, b!H) by awriterwrites ; @comebackassholes  (dimpled_halo)

the one where Harry and Louis are on a journey through life together — one that includes discovering dark, hidden parts of themselves that only the other can find.

take my whole life too (e, WIP, b!L) by @goodmorninglou

Louis knows three things, at the base of it all.

He likes when Harry hurts him. He doesn’t know why, not really, but he knows that he likes it. Likes giving up control, likes feeling small and taken care of, likes being praised for taking whatever Harry gives him for as long as he gives it.

He and Harry are meant to be. No matter what time they finally fall together, what day, what age, what place, the moment that they do, that’ll be it. It’s going to be them against everyone else, hand in hand for the rest of their lives. That’s been a given since they met. The half of Louis’ soul that’s missing is Harry’s.

And, sans those two things, he doesn’t really know much of anything at all.

just walk my way (e, 10k, b!L) by @softandslow (I just now read this one and - holy shit?? it’s so good (just like all of these but - wow))

Louis is a Victoria's Secret Angel and Harry is the main act of the night.

the spaces between us hold all our secrets (e, 56k, verse) by @ropewithnoanchor

Louis is struggling with panic attacks brought on by being closeted, and he realizes that subspace brings him peace like nothing else can. So Harry must step up to the plate and take control of his usually dominant boyfriend.

take me down (e, 13k, b!L) 

Louis and Harry explore Daddy!kink and subspace

learn to let go (e, 4k, b!l, b!H mentions) by ashavahishta 

Louis decides he wants Harry to try fisting him. It's not as simple as he thought. (Or, Louis and Harry experiment with getting Louis into subspace for the first time.)

give and take (e, 1k, b!L) by @captivekinqs

sometimes louis just needs.

you and I found love, lost under the shade (e, 4k, b!H) by @angelichl

The pain is a distraction. It pulls him to the present, forces him to think simply, drags him into the spaces between the letters of the word now. There's no time to think of anything else, anything other than the strange and dissonant mixture of pleasure and pain.

+ the peach series by the lovely @falsegoodnight touches on it! 

+ if you read b!H, most of mercutionotromeo ‘s fics explore those topics as well! 

+ a few of mine also touch on those, if you’re interested! 

nothing worsens, nothing grows 

what’s mine is yours to make your own 

forgive the urgency, but hurry up and wait 

ahh I hope this is enough to start you off! there’s a lot of these kinds of fics but very few that I feel like portray it or explore it in a realistic way. hopefully you’ll enjoy some of these!!! 

happy reading, and I hope you’re doing well! <3

[funkymbtifiction]

How I Write, How I Dream: ESTP Edition

Mod: An ESTP asked permission to submit this, since she noticed I do not have an ESTP ‘How I write stories’ description in the archive to match this series. What follows is in her own words.

ESTP: How I Write, How I Dream

So this submission is like 6+ years late topically, I think, but it’s an understatement to say I get side-tracked easily. First I had to be self-aware enough to actually determine my type with confidence, and then I had to remember to write this up. Hopefully it’s an edition that’s better late than never – in any case, I thought it might be fun to contribute, given the frequent lack of Se-dom voices in things like this.

I’m aware that I might be in a comparatively small group as a regular ESTP writer, let alone one familiar with personality typology, but I wrote my first short story at nine for a 4th grade assignment, and then my first full story/intended book when I was eleven, (both of which I immediately proceeded to act out on the playground), so it’s sort of always been a part of my normal retinue of hobbies/coping mechanisms/diversions/distractions. Usually I find that I write the most when I’m bored or otherwise dissatisfied with my real life – sort of using it to spice things up with more exciting events, even if they’re regrettably fictional. I also suspect that I use writing to experience all the interesting things I find myself unable to physically do, at least for the moment – not unlike what your ISTP contributor described. I think sometimes that I use it to subconsciously work through certain concepts, too, until I understand them holistically. It’s like it gives me a way to actually engage and interact with a philosophical concept through tangible expression – through embedding it into [fictional] human behavior. Like how I understand the nuances of the concept of apostasy better for having walked through the plot of Silence (2016) with Scorsese than I would have if it was still just a definition in a theology textbook. Application helps me. (I also had a counselor a while back who told me that I used my writing to work through the emotions I hate to process in real life, but I was never wholly convinced of that or the connection of my plots to my real life events, so jury’s out, I guess.)

When I was a kid, I liked to read a fair-ish amount. Spies were oftentimes my favorite topic, but I also wanted eagerly to be one and owned probably every kid spy gadget ever manufactured for sale at the Spy Museum in D.C., to which I dragged my parents practically every weekend so I could crawl through air vents, etc. However, my favorite children’s series of all was actually the Ingo series by the late Helen Dunmore, which provided me with exciting, nature-based, and [mostly] emotionally satisfying adventures in my lifelong favorite unpredictable environment – underwater. (I also dragged my parents constantly to our local aquarium.) As I got older, the frequency of my reading dropped, and I now find myself usually pulled more towards nonfiction.

[Note – I just realized a lifelong quirk with me and books. I’m sort of ridiculously set on *seeing* the books I own. I mean, I know what I own, but I still constantly get out every book I own on a particular topic just to see them all at once. It makes the knowledge more cohesive for me to concentrate it visually, I guess. Even just the covers. Anyway.]

My writing habits are kind of awful – in that, like alluded to above, I pretty much only write when I either a) am seized by a great idea, or else b) have nothing better to do. I have little ambition to actually publish or anything like that, regardless of encouragement, and I prefer to think of my writing as just a diversion, an amusement for myself alone (though I do crave minimal approval, as I do in anything). In any case, as soon as the pressure of a schedule is attached to my writing, it drains of all joy for me. Much like your ISTP contributor described, I think I hover somewhere between plotter and pantser, depending on the story. Too much planning leads to my feeling like I have no incentive to actually write it, as I’ve already experienced it, and too little leaves me spinning aimlessly with no real direction. I write both prose and screenplays, and the rule seems to hold true for both, overall. Also, whenever I have a problem in my plotting or characters or whatever, I find that I have to step away, go be busy with something else, sometimes for a long while, and when I come back everything just falls into place. I guess unconscious Ti and/or Ni finding solutions? I’m not totally sure how/why that happens.

As my inclusion of screenplay format may suggest, I experience my stories in an incredibly visual way. I think sometimes that my narratives come across very much like movies, with all the requisite limitations and usual lack of character introspection. I feel like I pretty much focus on the observable actions of my characters – I find describing any kind of extended rumination highly unnatural, at least most of the time. Even my planning is highly visual. I have a tendency to graph, chart, draw, and plaster my options all over the walls. It’s ridiculous sometimes, but in many cases I just have to be able to see them all next to each other, even if there’s no other information provided. Like my books, mentioned earlier. It helps clarify my plot choices in my mind. It’s also a quirk/weakness of mine that I am often entirely dependent on outside images for descriptions. I need to find a real person, place, or thing to base my fictional ones on physically if I hope to have any kind of concrete knowledge to allow description. Again, it helps solidify them/it in my mind.

I have another weakness in my writing that often results in much incredulous laughter – I’m often entirely blind to any hidden meaning or symbolism in my own writing. I might get the vaguest sense of something being a good line, but be unsure why until my ISFJ friend starts praising my deep, archetypal references and crafting – and then staring at me when I clearly have no idea what she means. It’s happened several times by this point, and though it makes me laugh, I’ll just blame it on the subconscious inferior Ni. I pretty much never have any kind of goal of being symbolic or laden with deep meaning. If I were ever to try that, I think it would massively stress me out.

In terms of editors, beta readers, or whatever else we want to call those who give solicited criticism – that’s just what I need/want. Criticism. For the most part, I’m incredibly thick-skinned about my writing and would be absolutely fine if someone told me that it was utterly terrible and the whole thing needed revising down to the very concept. That may be because I think many of my concepts are lackluster to start with. But nothing frustrates me so quickly as readers unwilling to actually [and harshly] criticize. I always tell them that I want him/her to rip it to shreds. I mean, that’s the only way it’ll get better. (I’ve made mistakes before by assuming that other writers feel this way, too – my sister did not appreciate my input.)

I write almost exclusively dramas these days, I guess, though of varying subtypes. (I also maintain the availability/ready accessibility of about 10+ stories at any given time of active writing. I bounce between them sometimes based on what I’m feeling like at the moment or what I have a new thought about.) I have a sort of historical drama thing that takes place in the 1680s, a modern drama prompted by a premise of genetic engineering, a Most Dangerous Game kind of hunting/weapons thing, a detective story in the immediate aftermath of WWII, a classic deserted island story, a thing involving the phenomenon of stigmata… the list goes on and shifts constantly.

However, while I’ve typically enjoyed writing, here’s the omnipresent rub – engaging with it for any great amount of time makes me really unhealthy emotionally. I’m pretty sure that after like two or three days primarily working on a story without other overriding priorities, or like six or seven with those scattered distractions, (at best), I’m plummeting straight down to my inferior functions. My historical stories do this even more quickly, because they oftentimes seem to require more mental effort. I get super irritable, drown in self-loathing, start to think that everything real that I want is never going to happen – it’s really not good. The fact of the matter is that while writing is a fun diversion oftentimes, I go insane doing it for too long, because I need to get out and engage. (Thanks to my pesky Se-dom, daring to ask for more than just incessant fidgeting.)

When I do write, however, I’m known for my in-depth research, my character-driven plots, lines some people in my life seem to think are witty or something, and emotional depth, believe it or not. I’ve been complimented on it, as well as my tendency to accurately portray mental/emotional illness. I don’t know. I’ve never thought I was overly talented at such things, but then again, I never paid much attention. Even this write-up has been hard – analyzing my writing like this. It’s not a strength of mine to scrutinize my own habits.

After all, I’m busy – I have to go blast Maroon 5 as I jump off a 20-foot wall yelling, “Parkour!”

I am an ESTP, remember? ;-)

[ts1989fanatic]

Every Taylor Swift Album Ranked

We revisited each of the singer’s original studio albums and ranked them from best to worst.

FEATURESEvery Taylor Swift Album Ranked

We revisited each of the singer’s original studio albums and ranked them from best to worst.

By Slant Staff on July 6, 2021

Taylor Swift started off as a country artist at a time when the genre was both less respectful and accommodating of the voices of women than at any other point in its storied history. The singer’s first four albums barely scan as country music in a meaningful way, instead embracing her preternatural gifts for pop conventions, and her output has gotten stronger the more openly she’s embraced those skills. In the 15 years since the single “Tim McGraw” launched Swift to country stardom, she’s jettisoned the genre’s ill-fitting signifiers and overcome the limitations of her early recordings—improvements captured in her “Taylor’s Version” re-recordings of those albums as a powerful statement of artistic agency.

As Swift takes an apparent break from new music to re-record those early releases, including Fearless (Taylor’s Version) and this fall’s highly anticipated Red redux, we revisited each of her original studio albums and ranked them from best to worst.

9. Taylor Swift (2006)

Though she was praised for her songwriting right out of the gate, what Swift’s self-titled debut truly shows in hindsight is how diligently she’s worked to hone her craft over the years. Some of her trademarks—her gift for melody, her third-act POV reversals—were already present here, but there’s a sloppiness to the writing that she’s long since cleaned up. Whether that’s emphasizing the wrong syllables of words because she hadn’t quite mastered the meter of language (most notable on “Teardrops on My Guitar”) or mixing metaphors (on “Picture to Burn” and the otherwise catchy “Our Song”), there’s a lack of polish and editing on Taylor Swift

8. Fearless (2008)

Nearly every track on Swift’s sophomore effort, Fearless, builds to a massive pop hook. But while her grasp of song structure at this point in her career suggested an innate talent for how to develop a melody, Fearless also highlights Swift’s then-limited repertoire and lack of creativity in constructing her narratives of doe-eyed infatuations and first loves gone wrong. It’s admirable that she tries to incorporate more sophisticated elements into a few of the songs here, but dancing with or kissing someone in the rain is a default image that crops up with nearly the same distracting frequency as references to princesses, angels, and fairy tales. Fearless, however, just as strongly made the case that Swift had the goods for a long, rich career. The bridge to “Fifteen” includes a great, revealing line about a friend’s lost innocence (“And Abigail gave everything/She had to a boy/Who changed his mind/And we both cried”), while the playful melody of “Hey Stephen” captures the essence of what makes for indelible teen-pop.

7. Speak Now (2010)

Swift’s third album, Speak Now, is problematic in precisely the same ways that its predecessors are, but there isn’t a song here that isn’t an absolute wonder of technical construction. Perhaps even more impressive is Swift’s mastery of song structure. Consider how the instrumentation drops out during the last two words of the hook in “Last Kiss,” allowing the singer’s breathy vocal delivery to bear the entirety of the song’s emotional weight, or how a simple acoustic guitar figure on “Enchanted” slowly crescendos behind each repetition of the line “I was enchanted to meet you.” Unfortunately, the greater complexity and range found in Swift’s sound and in her song constructions doesn’t necessarily translate to her songwriting. Her narrators often seem to lack insight because Swift writes with the point of view that hers is the only story to be told, which makes songs like “Dear John” and “Better Than Revenge” come across as shallow and shortsighted. And though she does vary her phrasing in ways that attempt to mask her limited voice, Swift is still noticeably off-pitch at least once on every song on the album.

6. Red (2012)

Considering that Swift’s previous material was almost always better when she tossed the ill-fitting country signifiers and focused on her uncanny gift for writing pop hooks, Red was a smart, if overdue, move for the singer. The album plays as a survey course in contemporary pop, and Swift is game to try just about anything, from the uninhibited dance-pop of standout “Starlight” to the thundering heartland rock of “Holy Ground.” The tracks that work best are those on which the production is creative and modern in ways that are in service to Swift’s songwriting. The distorted vocal effects and shifts in dynamics on “I Knew You Were Trouble” heighten the sense of frustration that drives the song, and the driving rhythm section on “Holy Ground” reflects Swift’s reminiscence of a lover who “took off faster than a green light, go.” Not all of the songs here are so keenly observed—“State of Grace” and “I Almost Do” lack the specificity that’s one of Swift’s songwriting trademarks, while the title track underwhelms with its train of pedestrian similes and metaphors—but if Red is ultimately too uneven to be a truly great pop album, its highlights were career-best work for Swift at the time.

5. Lover (2019)

Swift’s seventh album, Lover, lacks a unified sonic aesthetic, ostensibly from trying to be something to everyone. The title track, whose lilting rhythm and reverb-soaked drums and vocals are reminiscent of Mazzy Star’s ‘90s gem “Fade Into You,” and the acoustic “Soon You’ll Get Better,” a tribute to Swift’s mother, hark back to the singer’s pre-pop days, while “I Think He Knows” and “False God” evoke Carly Rae Jepsen’s brand of ‘80s R&B-inflected electro-pop. When it comes to things other than boys, though, Swift has always preferred to dip her toes in rather than get soaking wet; her transformation from country teen to pop queen was, after all, a decade in the making. Less gradual was Swift’s shift from political agnostic to liberal advocate. Her once apolitical music is, on Lover, peppered with references to America’s current state of affairs, both thinly veiled (“Death by a Thousand Cuts”) and more overt (“You Need to Calm Down”). “Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince,” however, is her stock in trade, a richly painted narrative punctuated by cool synth washes and pep-rally chants, while “The Archer” is quintessential Swift: wistful, minimalist dream pop that displays her willingness to acknowledge and dismantle her own flaws, triggers, and neuroses.

4. Reputation (2017)

In the run-up to the release of her sixth album, Reputation, Swift was excoriated by fans and foes alike for too often playing the victim. The album’s lyrics only serve to bolster that perception: Swift comes off like a frazzled stay-at-home mom scolding her disobedient children on “Look What You Made Me Do” and “This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things.” But it’s her willingness to portray herself not as a victim, but the villain of her own story that makes Reputation such a fascinatingly thorny glimpse inside the mind of pop’s reigning princess. Swift has proven herself capable of laughing at herself, thereby defusing the criticisms often levied at her, but with Reputation she created a larger-than-life caricature of the petty, vindictive snake she’s been made out to be. By album’s end, Swift assesses her crumbling empire and tattered reputation, discovering redemption in love—only Reputation isn’t so much a rebirth as it is a retreat inward. It marks a shift from the retro-minded pop-rock of 2014’s 1989 toward a harder, more urban aesthetic, and Swift wears the stiff, clattering beats of songs like “…Ready for It?” like body armor.

3. Evermore (2020)

Evermore is at once as confident and complete a statement as Folklore. Certainly, it matters that the two albums were born of the protracted isolation of the Covid-19 pandemic and that collaborators like Bon Iver and the National’s Aaron Dessner figure prominently on both. But Evermore finds Swift digging further into her explorations of narrative voice and shifting points of view, taking bigger risks in trying to discover how the newfound breadth of her songwriting could possibly reconcile with the arc of her career. What makes Evermore an essential addition to her catalog is her willingness to tell others’ stories with the same insight and compassion with which she’s always told her own. And on this album, in particular, the stories she tells are about how her narrators’ choices impact others, often in ways that cause irreparable harm.

2. 1989 (2014)

Swift’s 1989 severed whatever vestiges of her country roots remained on 2012’s Red, replacing acoustic guitars and pedal steel with multi-layered synthscapes, drum machines, and densely packed vocal tracking. Swift, of course, got her start writing astutely observed country ballads, and these songs bolster her trademark knack for lyric-crafting with maximalist, blown-out pop production courtesy of collaborators Max Martin and Jack Antonoff. The album’s standout tracks retain the narrative detail and clever metaphor-building that distinguished Swift’s early songs, even amid the diversions wrought by the aggressive studio production on display throughout. Songs like “I Know Places” ride a reggae swagger and trap-influenced snare beats before launching into a soaring, Pat Benatar-esque chorus. It’s an effortless fusion that, like much of 1989, displays Swift’s willingness to venture outside her comfort zone without much of a safety net, and test out an array of sonic experiments that feel both retro and of the moment.

1. Folklore (2020)

Folklore is neither a culmination of Swift’s career to date nor a pivot in a new direction. She’s doing exactly what she’s always done: offering a collection of incisive, often provocative songs that incorporate authentic, first-person details and leaving others to argue over specific genre signifiers. Song for song, the album finds Swift at a new peak in her command of language. While tracks like “Cardigan” and “Invisible Strings” hinge on protracted metaphors, “Mad Woman” and “Peace” are blunt and plainspoken. In every instance, what’s noteworthy is Swift’s precision in communicating her exact intent. That she employs her long-established songwriting tropes in novel ways is truly the most significant development here. She’s mined this type of melancholy tone before, but never for the full length of an album and certainly never with such a range of perspectives. It isn’t the weight of the subject matter alone that makes Folklore feel so vital—it’s the exemplary caliber of her writing. The album finds Swift living up to all of the praise she earned for her songwriting earlier in career.

ts1989fanatic not sure I 100% agree with their ranking order and some of the snark on reputation is a little OTT but overall it’s not bad

[recklessfiction]

Same Anon on the riverbend. I'm so sorry for the intrusion. I do have several questions though, if that's okay with you.

This is especially in the case of Spring. I found Her character interesting because She loves all, although, loving all can be a bit tricky (and losing can be painful) when I assume She's an ancient being who has to watch everything She creates fade with the passing of time.

Is Spring sometimes a cruel mistress? Does She love Her creations a bit too much to let them go? Does denying Her companionship too aggressively bring immediate death, or a slow one, wherein s/he who denies Spring will watch as everything around them wither and wilt, the people, plants, animals, so on? Are Summer, Winter and Autumn present in your lore? Do they, too, have unspeakable features like Spring?

It’s no intrusion at all! I’ve thought about how I’d portray the seasons and Spring, to me, seems very soft spoken but also very fickle, probably not noticing too much if its creations die or fade away as it would be immediately off doing something else. I think all the season would kind of be like that, after millenia of watching or causing things to die, they’d become desensitized to it.

I wouldn’t call Spring cruel b/c that would imply that its actively malicious but honestly anything horrible it would do would be done out of ignorance or apathy. Like the things it creates, Spring would fall in love fast and hard, often tricking people into its garden where they’ll be trapped with it forever. But after a while something else will distract it and it’ll abandon whatever poor human its stolen to an eternal springtime. I think if you get on the wrong side of Spring it would just send you spiralling into insanity, plaguing your senses with sensations so beautiful and wonderful that you can’t take them in all at once. Overstimulate you with the beauty of Spring. 

I do have thoughts on the other seasons, yes. I’ve written Winter as having a grotesque stone or crystal mask which it always wears and beneath which no one has ever seen. Autumn would sometimes be a large collection of mushrooms which sometimes look vaguely human shaped when clustered  tightly. I don’t know about Summer too much but the vibe would be haughty and probably a piece of shit.  

[96thdayofrage]

Aretha Franklin was larger than life. Her voice, her physical presence, her personality, her place in musical history. Everything about Aretha was big. To appropriately portray the scope of her story, and everything she represented, the treatment must be larger than life.

National Geographic’s 8-part series, “Genius: Aretha” does the exact opposite.

To begin with, there’s a reason they call television “the small screen.” It’s not a medium for epic storytelling, or anything with significant scope. The way the series is shot feels very much like daytime television, rather than a cinematic experience. But that alone isn’t what makes this story feel so small.

The opening title sequence of each episode contains music that sounds like a midi track from an old video game — a bizarre musical choice to set the tone for a story about Aretha Franklin, a brilliant and inspiring musician who was named the #1 greatest singer of all time by Rolling Stone Magazine.

Suzan Lori-Parks’ script diminishes The Queen of Soul to a mere caricature. The dialogue is so poorly written, it becomes a distraction to the story. Throughout the overlong show, Parks takes tangential details and tries to make them absurdly momentous. And worse, she reduces some of Franklin’s grandest moments into side notes, or skips them entirely. For example, we see Aretha (barely) react to the announcement of Dr. King’s death. But why did they gloss over the fact that Aretha sang at his funeral? Instead, the episode included a fictional scene of Aretha and MLK flirting during a smoke break. A classic example of sacrificing an iconic moment, for a silly (and untrue) scene in its place.

The entire show feels like an effort to confuse the audience as to what time period it’s supposed to be in. This is partially due to the scattered direction from Anthony Hemingway. The flashbacks are confusing, in part because some are in black and white, while others are in color. Stylistically, the black and white treatment never works because the picture looks as bright and clear as if it was shot yesterday. Nothing else was done to make the “old” scenes look old.

Another authenticity problem is the gospel music sung by young Aretha. While Shaian Jordan has a lovely voice, it is a contemporary R&B sound, and does not remotely resemble the style in which Aretha Franklin sang as a child. Her voice is much smaller than young Aretha’s, and yet audiences respond with rapturous applause as if she just brought the house down. This is distracting, to say the least.

Overall, the acting leaves much to be desired, and is not helped by the lackluster script. Each actor’s delivery feels like they are reciting lines. The pacing as a whole is painfully slow, yet each individual scene feels rushed.

In life, Aretha was surrounded by celebrities from an early age. Her father was a famous minister, and they had countless famous friends. Even from a young age, some of Aretha’s closest friends and neighbors grew up to be stars as well. So, to properly tell Aretha Franklin’s story, you need a glittery cast of A-list talent. NatGeo fell painfully short in this department, as no one is actually a star.

The closest thing to an A-list celebrity is Courtney B. Vance, who has enjoyed an illustrious screen career. But even he is sadly out of his element playing Aretha’s father, the iconic Rev. CL Franklin. His portrayal feels like a caricature, and much of his story arc is straight from the salacious rumor mill.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, NatGeo’s worst error was the miscasting of British musical theater actress Cynthia Erivo as Aretha Franklin.

Perhaps most obviously, Erivo simply does not possess the physicality to play Aretha at any stage of her life. Her stature is far too small, and her costars tower over her in most scenes. Aretha had unique presence both onstage and off. She was a commanding figure — a force — and yet she had the most graceful way of moving. Her gestures were understated and subtle. Erivo’s movements are hurried and harsh, and her physical presence lacks the authority of Aretha.

One of the most distracting elements is Erivo’s speaking voice. Aretha had a high, breathy, flirtatious voice, with a specific lilt in her cadence. For reasons unknown, Erivo speaks in a low, emotionless monotone, which is reminiscent of her previous characters, Celie (“The Color Purple”) and Harriet Tubman (“Harriet”). It would seem that Erivo has one American accent in her arsenal and uses it with each American role she takes on. Perhaps the most difficult moments to watch are when she accidently slips back into her British accent, taking the audience fully out of the scene. Why no one on set caught these major gaffes is beyond comprehension.

Erivo’s character development completely misses the mark. Aretha had a strong personality, but was also shy, coy, demure, feminine, and cool at the same time. Erivo’s portrayal is surprisingly one-dimensional. It would seem that her only view of Miss Franklin was “angry diva.” But Aretha was far more than a diva, and when her “diva” came out, it was often coupled with a wink and a nod. Aretha loved to laugh and had a wonderful sense of humor. Erivo’s Aretha is painfully void of comic relief, completely ignoring Franklin’s playful and acerbic wit. The one instance she attempts to show this side (telling her band a joke about a chicken), it falls completely flat.

While Erivo’s singing is strong throughout, it never reaches that spine-tingling level of Aretha’s unbridled delivery. Instead, it feels like a carefully rehearsed karaoke imitation. Unlike Andra Day’s recent tour de force performance as Billie Holiday (“The United States Vs. Billie Holiday), Erivo never manages to get lost in the character, even during her best musical moments.

In addition, many of the musical moments would appear to be added after the fact, just to remind the audience that this is still Aretha Franklin’s story we are watching.

Arguably the biggest letdown of this entire endeavor is the song selection. NatGeo did not secure the rights to Franklin’s most beloved songs in her catalogue. So what we get here is a string of lesser known songs from Aretha’s repertoire — and often, songs more closely associated with other acts (Sam Cooke’s “A Change Is Gonna Come,” Otis Redding’s “Satisfaction,” Dusty Springfield’s “Son of a Preacher Man” and Diana Ross’s “Reach Out and Touch”).

Before Miss Franklin died, it’s been said that she specifically requested not to have her story told on television. (Instead, she famously asked Jennifer Hudson to bring her story to life on the big screen in MGM’s “Respect,” due in theaters this August.) Aretha knew what National Geographic and its showrunners did not — her story is larger than life and should be treated as such.

[ofgeneticperfection]

ABCs of your OCs

A list of oc questions in alphabetical categories - i made each category based on the first word I could think of in alphabetical order, so enjoy!

A: Aptitude 1. What are your oc’s natural abilities, things they’ve been doing since young? Well as far as natural goes, she’s always been good at digging up details and exploring things. She’s always had the ability to read people as well and has always been able to manipulate her way through situations.  2. What activities have they participated in? Does being a Science Experiment count as an activity? She’s certainly not had the chance to join clubs or extracurricular but she’s managed to find people who have taught her how to Hack and code on the side. Aside from that she’s assisted with other experiments.  3. What abilities do they have that they’ve worked for? By work she’s had to gain control over them but that would be her Telekinesis mostly. She’s also worked to learn how to fight with her fan-blades, combat is a skill no?

4. What things are they bad at? Showing emotions. She’s been taught that they make you weak or get in the way so for the most part she tends to really hide them, even from herself. I guess she’s bad at dealing with them too because of that. She usually just overrides the bad ones with distractions or sedatives. 5. What is their most impressive talent? Hmm...probably Telekinesis? Though arguably her skill with computers can be quite impressive, she does help discover how to upload consciousness after all. 

B: Basics 1. what is their hair color? Platinum or I like to say Moonwhite 2. what is their eye color? Electric blue, they have that glow behind them.  3. how tall are they? 5′4 4. how old are they? If she no longer ages, does it matter? 5. how much do they weigh? 125lbs

C: Comfort  1. how do they sit in a chair?  With legs curled up into it 2. in what position do they sleep? Curled on her stomach 3. what is their ideal comfort day? Remind me what a comfort day is? I don’t think she knows. 4. what is their major comfort food? why?  Cupcakes - They’re pretty and taste amazing 5. who is the best at comforting them when down? Reeve Tuesti animus-inspire

D: Decoration 1. how would they decorate a house if they had one under their name? Her color scheme would be black and royal blue and it would probably have a victorian-esque style to the furniture. 2. how would they decorate their child’s room? What child? x) 3. how do they decorate their own room? Much like above, black bed, blue carpet, vanity, antique looking mirrors, books strewn about etc..and then probably some high tech laptop xD 4. what type of clothes and accessories do they wear? She usually wears some type of dress or long sweater dress w/ leggings type of outfits. But she does get into her crazy sci-fi armor mode at times with metallic bands and alien-esque designs. Example HERE  Also, syringe belts, corset tops, vinyl...whatever she feels like but nothing ever baggy or denim.  5. do they like makeup/nail/beauty trends? I’m not sure that she’s into trends but if she’s browsing and finds a look that she likes she bound to try it out with her own twist to it. 

E: External Personality 1. does the way they do things portray their internal personality? Not exactly, she tends to a hide a lot by using the outside as a mask. Usually a cold exterior and the colder she is about something? Chances are the more that it actually bothers her inside. 2. do they do things that conform to the norm? I’m not sure she knows what normal is #lablife 3. do they follow trends or do their own thing? She tends to do her own thing  4. are they up-to-date on the internet fads? She doesn’t care 5. do they portray their personality intentionally or let people figure it out on their own? People are going to have to figure it out on their own, whatever she portrays is what she wants certain people to see. It’s all a controlled act unless you do break through to her. 

F: Fun 1. what do they do for fun? Tease people!, Works on her own projects, Talks to pet lab mice >> 2. what is their ideal party? A fancy club/bar with drinks and the atmosphere to not give a fuck about anything 3. who would they have the most fun with? Reeve Tuesti 4. can they have fun while conforming to rules? No, rules usually get broken whether intentional or not.  5. do they go out a lot? Not in her earlier years, and I wouldn’t say a lot but she does jump at any chance to get out when she can in later years or certain verses. 

G: Gorgeous 1. what is their most attractive external feature? Oof, I’d rather someone else answer but I would say her eyes? They’re very prominent .  2. what is the most attractive part of their personality? Sly, cunning, seductive. I know people like the tease and the mystery. 3. what benefits come with being their friend? Extreme favors and definitely protection. Need anything that science can create? She’s got your back. 4. what parts of them do they like and dislike? She likes her loyalty and strength but she dislikes her alien side and does what she can to hide it from others.  5. what parts of others do they envy? She doesn’t. In her mind she’s Perfect and has been conditioned that way. 

H: Heat 1. do they rather a hot or cold room? Cold so she can snuggle.  2. do they prefer summer or winter? Summer! 3. do they like the snow? It’s pretty...but it’s very cold so not really.  4. do they have a favorite summer activity? She loves the ocean and to hang at Costa del Sol. 5. do they have a favorite winter activity? She doesn’t experience much Winter in Midgar. 

I: In-the-closet 1. what is their sexuality? Most likely Bi.  2. have they ever questioned their sexuality? No. She likes what she likes. 3. have they ever questioned their gender? No....aside from the fact she’s part alien??? 4. would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT? What family? 5. how long would/did it take for them to come out?  She’s pretty much a take me how I am or leave it type. 

J: Joy 1. what makes them happy? Kisses, attention, affection 2. who makes them happy? Reeve! 3. are there any songs that bring them joy? Hip-hop de Chocobo :| 4. are they happy often? No - certain verses though....when Reeve’s around >> 5. what brings them the most joy in the world? Once again, Reeve x) and being called perfect by certain someones

K: Kill 1. have they ever thought about suicide? Self harm, yes. But never suicide. That would mean losing.  2. have they ever thought about homicide? Yeah most likely :| 3. if they could kill anyone without punishment, would they? who? Anyone who hurts whoever she protects or loves. Then again...she believes that’s the easy way out and she’d rather break them mentally or make them suffer over death.  4. who would miss them if they died? Her sissy Ari, Reeve, and I’d like to think Hojo.  5. who would be happy they died, anyone? I’M SURE! But I don’t know who. DO tell me if it’s you xD Certain sects of Avalanche perhaps?

L: Lemons 1. what is their favorite fruit? Pineapple, Kiwi, Raspberries, Loganberries 2. what is their least favorite fruit? Blueberries maybe? 3. are there any foods they hate? Pork products 4. do they have any food intolerance? Intolerant of shitty options  5. what is their favorite food? Sushi!

M: Maternal 1. would they want a daughter or a son? If with the right person, sure? She’d more lean towards a Son. 2. how many children do they want? It would all depend.  3. would they be a good parent? Probably 4. what would they name a son? what would they name a daughter? I don’t want to sit here forever just to figure this out xD It’ll come to her when the time comes. 5. would they adopt? If there was reason, sure. 

N: Never Have I Ever 1. what would they never do? Betray someone she loves. 2. what have they never done that they want to do? Gold Saucer please :V 3. is there anything they absolutely can’t believe people do? She certainly doesn’t understand camping. 4. what is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done? Oh um....thrown a cookie at the President? I’m sure she’s had lots of embarrassing moments.  5. have they done anything they thought they’d never do? Left the fucking labs! With Reeve of all people...never thought she’d see THAT coming. 

O: Optimism 1. are they optimistic or pessimistic? This tends to fluctuate 2. are they openly optimistic, throwing it on others? If she needs to cheer someone up.  3. are they good at giving advice? Yes! She’s very crafty and know’s how to work situations.     4. is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them? Hmmm...Arialla! 5. were they always optimistic? Not really

P: Personality 1. what is their best personality trait? Strength and Loyalty 2. what is their worst personality trait? Vindictive, Stubborn, Volatile 3. what of their personality do others love? Bold, Persistent 4. what of their personality do others envy? Fearless or crazy 5. do they hate anything about their personality/about other’s personalities? She hate weakness in others like...extreme William type weakness :| She tends to hate her own emotions quite a lot. 

Q: Questions 1. do they ask for help? Yes if she needs it! She’s always willing to trade a favor.  2. do they ask questions in class? She’s not in school but she asks questions. It’s part of the scientific method. 3. do they answer questions that make them a little uncomfortable? Yes...unless its something she wants to keep hidden. 4. do they ask weird questions? All the damn time 5. are they curious? VERY!

R: Rules 1. do they follow rules? What are those again? 2. would they be a strict or laid-back parent? Both? 3. have they ever been consequences for breaking a rule? Yes, but she thinks its amusing/funny. 4. have they broken any rules they now regret breaking? Nope! No regrets! 5. do they find any rules they/others follow absolutely ridiculous? Most of them to be honest. Why limit yourself with the limitations of others?

S: Streets 1. are they street-smart? No, she tries :| 2. would they give money to someone on the streets? Yeah 3. have they ever gotten in a fight on the streets? If she hasn’t it’ll happen at some point. 4. has anything happened to them on the streets? Um... well, she may have slept with someone on a street but we’re not talking about that >> 5. are they cautious when out? Yes, she’s always cautious. 

T: Truth 1. are they honest? No, depends who she’s talking too though.  2. can they tell if someone is lying? Yeah, she’s good at reading others.  3. is it obvious when they’re lying? It’s not obvious but she does have her tells which mostly involve diversions.  4. have they lied about anything they regret lying about? If anything, it’s the lies that she tells herself that she regrets.  5. have they told truths that have been spread against their will? Yes

U: Underdog 1. have they been bullied? That would be a stupid thing to do. 2. have they bullied anyone? Aside from teasing or being manipulative for a reason? I don’t think so. 3. have they been physically attacked by a bully? Nope - again that would be stupid 4. have they ever been doubted? Probably - Definitely  5. have they surprised people with being good at something? Yes

V: Vomit 1. do they vomit often? Not too often but when those emotions slip out in extremes she tends to throw up, what she shoves down must come up eventually. When she can’t take something this usually happens. Or if something impacts her hard. 2. do they get lots of stomach aches? Occasionally, she gets more headaches than anything. 3. are they good at comforting someone ill? Yes 4. what do they like as far as comfort goes? Someone to cuddle with 5. do they burp, cough, or hiccup most when nauseous? when vomiting? Coughs

W: Water 1. do they drink enough water? Probably not, if she even remembers to drink at all 2. have they learned to swim? Yes 3. do they like to swim? Yes 4. can they dive? Never tried 5. can they swim without holding their nose? Yes

X: Xylophone 1. what is their favorite genre of music? Electronic 2. do they have a favorite song? Too many to list x.x 3. do they have a favorite band/artist/singer? Still, too many to list 4. can they sing well? Yes 5. can they rap? Never tried to. 

Y: You 1. how old were you when you created them? 11 or 12 *cries* 2. what inspired you to create them? Final Fantasy 7 3. were they different when they were first created? Oh heck yes - she wasn’t even an experiment at first xD 4. do you enjoy writing them more than other characters? YES YES, she’s like all I can write really 5. what’s your favorite thing about them? How dynamic she is

Z: Zebra 1. what’s their favorite animal? Black Lions 2. do they like animals? Yes 3. cats or dogs? Cats 4. what’s their dream pet?  I’m sure if she wanted it she’d have it

5. do they have any pets at the moment? oooh, just a certain puppy  Tagged by: @animus-inspire (for messaging me this mess) Tagging: ALL OC’S PLEASE

[bestbranddesign]

10 Guidelines for Good Web Design: How to Learn Web Designing

Know about Web Design Guides

Summary: A website's success or failure is determined by its usability and usefulness, not its graphic design. User-centric architecture has become a common method for efficient and profit-oriented web design because the viewer to the website is the only one who clicks the mouse and therefore decides everything. Overall, if consumers can't access a feature, it's as if it doesn't exist at all.

We won't go into interface execution specifics (like where the search box should go) because it has already been covered in a variety of articles; instead, we'll concentrate on the key concepts, heuristics, and approaches for successful web design — approaches that, when applied correctly, will lead to more nuanced design decisions and make the process of perceiving provided knowledge easier. we have mentioned about HTML, coding, new website, website WordPress menu, website portfolio, desktop, and more.

Please keep in mind that you may be involved in the following usability-related posts that we've previously published:

• Excellent Web Design Principles: Craftsmanship

• 30 Usability Issues to Be Aware Of

• 9 Common Usability Mistakes In Web Design

Principles Of Good Responsive Website Design And Effective Web Design Guidelines

To better apply the concepts, we must first comprehend how people communicate with websites, how they think, and what the fundamental characteristics of their actions are.

What are the thoughts of the user?

Essentially, consumers' web activities are close to those of shoppers in a shop. Visitors take a brief glance at each new page, scroll through some of the text, and then click on the first link that piques their attention or looks slightly like what they're looking for. In reality, they don't even look at a significant portion of the website.

Necessary of web or web design or ux design

The majority of users look for something fascinating (or useful) and clickable, and when they see any promising candidates, they click. If the current page does not meet the user's standards, the user hits the Back button and the search ends. • Users respect consistency and trustworthiness. Users are able to sacrifice content for advertisers and the site's architecture if a website presents them with high-quality content. This explains why poorly built websites with high-quality content attract a large amount of traffic over time. The architecture that supports the content is less important than the content itself. • Users search rather than read. When users examine a web page, they look for fixed points or anchors that will lead them through the material.

• Internet consumers are frustrated and seek quick satisfaction. Easy principle: If a website fails to satisfy customers' needs, the author has struggled to do his job correctly, and the business has lost revenue. Users are more likely to abandon a website to look for alternatives if the cognitive load is heavy and the navigation is difficult. [DWU / JN]

• Users do not make the right decisions. Users aren't searching for the fastest way to get the details they need. They still don't search webpages in a sequential way, going from one part of the site to the next. Users, on the other hand, are happy to settle for the first rational choice. There's a fair chance they'll click a connection that seems to lead to the target as soon as they find it. Optimizing is difficult and time-consuming. Satisficing is a more effective way of doing it. • Users are guided by their instincts. In most instances, consumers muddle along rather than reading the detail given by the designer. The primary cause for this, according to Steve Krug, is that consumers are unconcerned. “Once we discover something that fits, we don't stray from it. We don't care if we understand how things work as long as we can bring them to use. If you want your viewers to believe you're building billboards, then make amazing billboards.”

• Consumers like to be in control. Users want to be able to monitor their browser and believe that data will be viewed consistently on the web. They don't want new windows to show up randomly, because they want to be able to return to the place they were on before using the "Back" icon, so it's best not to open connections in new browser windows.

1. Website or Web design details: Don't Ask Users to Consider

The web page should be obvious and self-explanatory, according to Krug's first rule of usability. When you're building a website, the goal is to eliminate the question marks — the choices that people would make deliberately, weighing pros and cons and contemplating alternatives. The number of question marks increases as the navigation and site design become less understandable, making it more difficult for users to grasp how the system operates and how to navigate from point A to point B. Users will navigate their way to their destination with the aid of a simple layout, mild visual cues, and clearly identifiable connections.

Consider the following situation. “Beyond networks, beyond brands, beyond distribution,” says Beyondis.co.uk. What does this imply? These three statements will be the first items users see on the page after it is loaded, so users prefer to explore websites in the "F"-pattern.

Although the interface is straightforward and intuitive, the user must look for the answer to learn what the page is for. This is what an extra question mark feels like. The designer's responsibility is to keep the amount of question marks as minimal as possible. The graphic description is on the right side of the page. Simply replacing all blocks would improve usability.

ExpressionEngine follows the same structure as Beyondis, but without the extra question marks. Furthermore, the phrase takes on new meaning as users are given the option to check out the service and trial the free edition.

Reduced cognitive load makes it easier for tourists to understand the system's concept. If you've done so, you'll be able to explain why the system is beneficial and how people will learn from it. People would not use the web blog if it is difficult to access.

2. Don't Exhaust Your Consumers' Time

When you're working on a project and you're trying to give your visitors a program or a tool, try to keep your customer expectations as low as possible. The fewer steps people must take in order to test a program, the more likely a random tourist would do so. First-time users tend to gamble with the app rather than filling out lengthy online applications for an account they might never use again. Allow people to browse the web and learn about the offerings without being forced to share personal information. Asking users to submit an email address in order to test a feature is unfair.

According to Ryan Singer, a developer on the 37Signals team, users would be more likely to give an email address if they were asked after seeing the feature in action and understanding what they would get in exchange.

Stikkit is an excellent example of a user-friendly service that needs virtually no interaction from the visitor and is unobtrusive and relaxing. And that's how you want your visitors to feel as they visit your web blog.

Mite, it seems, demands more. The registration, on the other hand, can be completed in under 30 seconds, thanks to the form's horizontal orientation, which removes the need for the user to scroll the tab. Drop any obstacles as far as possible; don't need subscriptions or registrations first. The mere act of registering a user is enough to stifle user navigation and reduce incoming traffic.

3. Ensure the users' attention is focused.

Since web pages contain both static and interactive content, certain features of the user experience are more noticeable than others. Obviously, pictures attract more interest than words, just as bolded sentences attract more attention than plain text.

Online users can easily perceive edges, shapes, and gestures because the human eye is an extremely non-linear system. This is why video-based ads are particularly irritating and distracting, but they do an outstanding job at catching consumers' interest from a marketing standpoint.

Humanized makes excellent use of the concentration concept. The only thing that consumers can see clearly is the word "free," which is enticing and desirable while remaining calm and purely informational. Users are given ample information on how to learn more about the "easy" commodity through subtle hints. By using visual elements to draw users' attention to particular parts of the web, you can help the guests get from point A to point B without having to worry about how to do it. The less concerns tourists have, the greater their sense of direction and the more confidence they can build in the business portrayed by the web. In other words, the less thinking that would occur behind the scenes, the greater the user interface, which is the primary goal of usability.

4. Aim for Feature Exposition

Modern web designers are often chastised for directing users by visually pleasing 1-2-3-done-steps, large buttons with visual effects, and so on. However, from a concept perspective, these components aren't inherently a bad thing. These guides, on the other hand, are highly useful because they direct users through the site's content in a very simple and user-friendly manner.

Dibusoft blends an appealing aesthetic with a well-organized web. The site's key navigation tools are available at first sight, and there are nine of them. However, the color scheme can be too light. A basic concept of good user interface design is to make it transparent to the user what features are accessible. It makes no difference if this is done. What counts is that guests are happy with how they communicate with the framework and that the material is well-understood.

5. Make Effective Writing a Part Of Your Strategy

Since the Web differs from print, it's important to tailor the writing style to the tastes and browsing habits of your audience. Promotional copy can not be read. Large blocks of text without pictures, as well as keywords in bold or italics, would be skipped. Excessive phrasing would be overlooked.

Let's talk about business. Stop titles that are funny or creative, marketing-driven, company-specific, or technical names that are obscure. For eg, if you're explaining a web and want people to build an account, "sign up" is superior to "start now!" and "explore our services."

Eleven2 doesn't waste much time getting to the stage. There are no sweet phrases or exaggerated stories. Instead, there is a price, which is just what tourists are looking for. Use short and concise phrases (get to the point as quickly as possible), scannable layout (categorize the content, use several heading levels, use visual elements and bulleted lists to break up the flow of uniform text blocks), and plain and objective language (a promotion doesn't have to sound like an advertisement; give your users some r

6. Attempt Simplicity

The KIS theory (keep it simple) should be the primary objective of site design. Users seldom use a site for the sake of the design; in reality, in most cases, they are searching for details regardless of the design. Rather than trying to be complicated, aim for consistency.

From the visitors' perspective, the best web design is pure text, with no ads or other page blocks that precisely complement the question or content they were looking for. One of the reasons that a user-friendly print edition of web pages is important for a positive user experience is because of this.

Finch delivers site material in a straightforward and concise manner, giving users a variety of choices without overwhelming them with needless information.

7. You Shouldn't Be Scared Of White Space

In reality, it's difficult to overestimate the value of white space. It not only helps guests minimize their cognitive burden, but it also allows them to understand the information shown on the computer. When a new user appears at a design layout, the first thing he or she does is search the web and break the subject field into conveniently digestible chunks.

Reading, scanning, analyzing, and working with complex systems is more difficult. If you have the option of using a visible line or other whitespace to separate two template parts, the whitespace approach is typically preferred. Complexity is reduced by hierarchical constructs (Simon's Law): the more you can give people a sense of visual hierarchy, the simpler your content would be to understand.

White space is beneficial. White space is a significant design feature on Cameron.io. The end result is a scannable layout that gives the material the prominence it deserves.

8. Use "Visible Language" to Communicate Easily

Aaron Marcus notes three basic concepts inherent in the use of so-called "seen text" — the information people see on a computer — in his articles on efficient visual communication.

• Organize: provide the consumer a logical and coherent philosophical framework. Organizational principles such as consistency, screen structure, partnerships, and navigability are essential. All elements shall follow the same conventions and laws.

• Save money by having as few prompts and graphic elements as possible. Simplicity, consistency, distinctiveness, and concentration are the four major points to remember. Only the most essential components for contact are used in simplicity. Clarity: All elements should be built in such a way that their purpose is obvious. Distinctiveness: The necessary elements' critical properties should be distinguishable. The most significant elements can be readily identifiable.

• Communicate: tailor the presentation to the user's skills. In order to interact efficiently, the user interface must combine legibility, readability, typography, symbolism, different viewpoints, and colour or texture. Using a maximum of three typefaces with a maximum of three point sizes per line of text, with a maximum of 18 words or 50-80 characters per line.

9. The Conventions Are Our Allies

A dull web is not the product of conventional site element architecture. Conventions, in particular, are extremely beneficial because they minimize the learning curve and the need to find out how things function. For example, if all websites displayed RSS feeds differently, it will be a usability nightmare. That's similar to how we arrange data (folders) or shop in our everyday lives (placement of products). You can gain users' respect, loyalty, and durability by using conventions, and you can also prove your reputation. Understand what users want from a site's navigation, text layout, and search placement, among other aspects.

A common example from usability sessions is to translate the web into Japanese (assuming the site visitors don't speak the language, e.g. with Babelfish) and give the usability testers the challenge of finding something in the translated page. Users would be able to accomplish a non-specific goal if conventions are followed correctly, even if they don't comprehend a word of it.

According to Steve Krug, it's best to invent only when you're certain you have a better idea, and to depend on conventions when you don't.

Tags: web design, ux web design, web design gallery, web hosting, responsive web, ux design, web logo, adaptive web, images for web, research web design, web research, choose best web design, website design or web design, website design portfolio, web WordPress, work for web design, responsive HTML, web design experience, work for web design, know coding for web design, ux ui

10. Test Early and Often

This so-called TETO-principle should be extended to any web design project because usability testing will also expose serious problems and issues with a layout.

Testing should not be done too late, too low, or for the wrong reasons. In the latter example, it's important to note that most design choices are local, which means you can't tell if one layout is better than another without evaluating it from a very particular viewpoint (considering requirements, stakeholders, budget etc.).

There are a few things to keep in mind:

• According to Steve Krug, testing one user is better than testing zero, and testing one user early in the project is better than testing 50 users at the end. According to Boehm's first theorem, mistakes arise more often during specifications and design tasks, and the longer they go uncorrected, the more costly they get.

• Testing is a continual operation. That is, you plan something, test it, repair it, and test it once more. There may be concerns that were not identified during the first round when users were essentially blocked by other issues.

• Usability evaluations consistently yield valuable results.

• A developer is unsuitable to test his or her code, according to Weinberg's rules. This is also so for artists. After a few weeks of working on a platform, you can no longer look at it with new eyes. You know how it's made, but you know precisely how it works — you have the experience that impartial reviewers and site users don't.

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Additional Resources:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Web_design

https://wordpress.org/showcase/tag/web-design/

https://www.wikihow.com/Learn-Web-Design

Location: https://goo.gl/maps/FnRzFUVMwwopXahE8

[angelicspaceprince]

Ouija

Author: Ama

Title: Ouija

Pairing: Possible Future Beetlejuice/Reader

Character/s: Beetlejuice

Word Count: 2, 473 words

Warnings: Beetlejuice has dyslexia, I do not, I tried.

Tags: @yankyo, @justballoonfishthings, @breadbudzo, @aethersghoulette, @ironically-deadinside, @beetlejuicecansteponme, @beetlebitchywitch (some of you asked, some of you I just tagged bc)

Prompt: You find a Ouija board and end up communicating with a ghost who has trouble spelling. Together you figure out a way for him to communicate with you a little bit easier.

Notes: I promised this fic like ages ago, based off of @slut-4-beetlejuice hcs that they wrote ages ago and we kinda did a dance of reblogs where we added to each other. But yeah, this is what I came up with! My plan for this fic is to do it in two parts and if y’all want more I can write more later, but I’m basically gonna portray your side of the story and then our favourite residential ghost with the most. This, obviously, is the reader’s side of the story. This is my first attempt at writing Beetlejuice as a fic, not as a hc so please be gentle with me. I hope y’all enjoy!Also, I had speechie friendo talk to me about dyslexia and I based Beej’s spelling mistakes around the notes she sent me.

Ouija Board Inspiration

Buy Me a Coffee

Ouija

It had started out innocently enough. You were bored and decided to spend the day exploring your new attic. You found a box filled with old games and decided that you wanted to sort through them, see if any were unusual or rare that you could keep. Most of them, you planned to donate somewhere, or put them back into storage.

You weren’t expecting much. Maybe a torn-up game of Twister, or Mouse Trap. Half a pack of Uno cards, or a ruined game of Trouble, and for the most part, you got what you expected. But when you found the Ouija board, you were a little surprised. Most of the games were for children, and weren’t in good enough nick to keep, let alone play. But the Ouija board looked like it just came out of the factory that created it. You go to lift the case from the bottom of the box, surprised by how heavy it was when you started to lift, nearly dropping it twice when you finally got it out and onto the table in front of you. Carefully, you lift the lid.

No wonder it was heavy. The Ouija board was wooden, and bigger than you were expecting. The dark wood had been engraved with the usual things a Ouija has, Yes, No, Goodbye, numbers 0-9 and every letter of the alphabet, the outside decorated with various designs you couldn’t make out in the dark. The one you could recognise was the pentagram engraved between the Yes and the No on the board. The planchette was also heavy, made from the same wood as the board, engraved with just two x’s, indicating where to put your finger.

You look over at the board as you hold the planchette in your hands. You were bored, yes. The attic was now in a state, yes. But the urge to test out the Ouija board was beginning to get too great. You organise yourself on the floor, placing the planchette in the middle of the board and just.... waiting. Not really sure on what to do now.

“Uh…hello?” Your voice is uncertain before you yelp when the cursor on the board begins to move. Yes, your fingers are on the x’s, but you weren’t providing any pressure. It just moved on its own.

‘H – I.’ The cursor spells out as your brain sort circuits as it returns to the centre of the board.

“Uhhhhh.” You pause, not sure how to proceed. “I’m Y/N. What’s your name?” The planchette seems to shake a little before moving towards the ‘No’ part of the board, returning to the centre. “You don’t want to tell me?” It moves back to the ‘No’. “That’s ok then. Can I ask if you’re really dead?” It moves to the ‘Yes’. “Is that yes I can ask, or yes you are?”

‘YES, I – A – M – D – E – D.’ You repeat the phrase once you’ve spelt out the letters quietly to show you’re aware of which letter the ghost was indicating with. “Sorry, I didn’t think I’d get a response, or one so soon.”

‘F – L – G – U – R – E – D.’

“Can I ask some questions about life after death?” You wait for the cursor to move over the Yes before continuing. “Is there a hell?”

So, it continued. Every day, after work, you’d come home and race up to the attic and spend time talking to your ghostly friend, who still wouldn’t tell you their name. All you knew was they were dead, had been for centuries, were bored, and were something called a bio-exorcist (which took a couple of attempts to spell). You also learnt that any form of parental figure, they hated, and any form of rules and regulations was not something they enjoyed.

You also noticed that they had a weird tendency to refuse certain questions or struggled to spell words correctly when they did. Sure, exorcist, intelligence and February weren’t easy words to spell when you weren’t writing them down, but replacing b’s for d’s and p’s for q’s, c’s for o’s and n’s for m’s. There were a lot of little things you picked up over time made you think perhaps there was more to this story.

So, you changed direction. One evening, you were talking about work and things that annoyed you and a question you thought they’d be fine answering, but the planchette just started to shake. You pause for a second, trying to figure out what was wrong. “Do you want to answer the question?” The cursor slides quickly and heavily to the ‘Yes’, causing you to move your whole body with it before it tentatively returns to the centre of the board. You think for a second as the planchette continues to vibrate with what feels like annoyance. “Can you spell the answer?” The planchette stops moving and everything is still. It’s so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. You wait for thirty seconds before you say “Hello?” and like that, the cursor slowly, tentatively, goes over towards the ‘No’ part of the board followed by a ‘A-L-W-A-Y-S-B-E-E-M-A-B-A-D-S-P-E-L-E-R. “Oh. That’s ok, I’m pretty rubbish without spell check too. Take your time.” Everything stops for a second, the energy that is always humming when you’re up here seems to have dropped to a low throb, and you slowly remove your hands from the planchette as you think.

‘How can I make this easier for them?’ You hum for a second before returning your hands to the board. “Would you prefer yes or no questions?” The planchette slides quickly over to the ‘Yes’ and you smile. “Ok, if something isn’t a yes or no question, I’ll provide answers and you can slide to the numbers to tell me which one is appropriate. Does that work?” Again, ‘Yes’.

Life moves on. It was weird at first, but you got used to asking only yes or no questions and becoming content with that as a response. A few more weeks went by, you slowly began to spend more time talking to the ghost in the attic. It was fascinating, and you were lonely and suspected they were too. Why else would they talk to you night after night after night? You never brought up the idea that perhaps they may have been lonely, but you focused on making sure like they felt like they had a friend.

A few more weeks had passed before you came up with a new idea. As good as it was to make them feel like they weren’t stupid for their spelling, you felt like you were muting them or speaking on their behalf. So, on your Saturday evening as you ate your dinner and you asked a question about if they enjoyed scaring people whenever they got the chance and the planchette moved by its own accord, you stared down at the board for a few minutes in shock. “You can move things WITHOUT me helping?”

‘Yes.’

“Why the fuck do I have to hold it then?” You forget to offer options as you take a breath, hearing the planchette slide across the board. “Its fine, I was just in shock.” You explain, not looking at what the ghost was being said. An idea pings in your head. “With your bad spelling, does it affect your reading or is it easier? One for both are hard, two for reading is easier.”

The planchette wobbles for a second before it slides over between the two. ‘R-E-A-D-I-M-G-I-S-S-T-I-L-L-H-A-R-D.’ It spells out. ‘B-UT-N-O-T-A-S-H-A-R-D-A-S-S-P-E-L-I-M-G.’

You can sense the confusion in the room as you nod, already thinking of a plan. “Have you always struggled with reading and spelling?” ‘A-L-W-A-Y-S-B-U-T-I-N-J-U-S-T-S-T-U-P-I-D’ You you’re your heart break slightly when they call themselves that. “Sweetheart, have you ever heard of the term dyslexia?” ‘No’. “It’s where your brain struggles to recognise letters or sounds, it makes it hard for people to read and write. They often miss letters or get letters mixed up, or sometimes even add letters that aren’t meant to be there.” You explain gently. “I think you may have the same kind my friend has. He reads a lot even though it’s a struggle, but if you get him to spell, he’s absolutely hopeless. Amazing at math, though. Like a walking calculator.” You smile as you get distracted before you shake your head and bring yourself back to the present. “I don’t think you’re stupid, love, I think perhaps your brain just isn’t wired to like letters and words.” You explain as you fiddle with your hands, unsure on where to put them. The planchette doesn’t move, but you can feel the air growing thicker.

‘N-O-T-S-T-U-P-I-D’ – the planchette draws a question mark over the entire board. You shake your head.

“Not stupid at all, pet.” A few seconds pass before the planchette moves over to the ‘Goodbye’ section. You sigh, slightly disappointed that they wanted to leave so soon. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

You ran late to work the next day, replaying the conversation in your head with your resident ghost over and over again as it kept you up later and later into the night. Your plan wasn’t well thought out at this stage, but you could get things started.

You stay late after work to make up for the hour that you missed this morning before rushing to the bookshop, making it there 10 minutes before they closed. You found what you wanted and quickly purchased it before rushing home, making sure to grab something for dinner as you drive home.

The moment you arrived home and placed your bags by the front door, the house felt empty. For the first time since using the Ouija board, the house felt like you were the only one in it. Pulling out the Ouija board, you asked if they were here. Nothing. You put your fingers on the planchette. Nothing again. You call out to them to see if they were there, nothing. You sigh before packing it back up. Perhaps your new-found friend had moved on.

It was a few days before your ghostly friend returned. The house had felt barren the entire time they were gone, you had stopped bringing out the board the day they returned, figuring that they just weren’t going to come back. A loud crash from the living room caused you to run out from the kitchen where you were preparing dinner to see what had happened. On the floor was the Ouija board, set up and ready to go with the planchette moving wildly across the board, so fast you couldn’t keep up.

“Hang on, hang on, hang on.” You rush back upstairs to grab the item you had purchased for them the week prior before rushing back downstairs and putting it next to the board with a satisfying thud. “I got you a dictionary, they had one with pictures which I thought could help.” You explain to where you hoped the ghost was. You put a pen in front of the giant book. “Just…. point I guess to the word you want to say. If you want to try it this way that is, I thought it might be easier for you.”

The air seemed thick as you waited for something to move, the planchette or the book. Suddenly, the cover of the book seemed to gingerly open as the ghost slowly looked for the words he was looking for. ‘IT-IS-EASIER’ they indicated with the pen. You smile as the pages begin to turn in a flurry, clearly excited to be able to communicate with you a bit easier.

So, life continued. The ghost (who you later found out was a man) would follow you from room to room, carrying the pen and the book to indicate different words to you, making comments on nearly everything that he wasn’t able to before, from the shade of paint on your walls (he thought they should be green) to what you were wearing (he was really into you wearing stripes for some reason), he would readily give your opinion on everything. It was weird, but you could feel yourself slowly falling for the now forever talking ghost. The freedom that came with the dictionary meant that your conversations become more…. conversation like. He wasn’t restricted to just yes or no answers, and you weren’t restricted to staying in one room. You found yourself having dinners next to the constantly page flipping book and laughing at his bad jokes and giving some back of your own. You found small doodles on the outside of the dictionary too, his own little crude drawings he did when you weren’t home. It was nice, it felt like some kind of perverse kind of domestic.

It had been months since your initial contact with him, and you still didn’t know his name and, to be honest, it was beginning to bug you. You didn’t say or show your annoyance about not knowing his name, but you figured it was time you knew. So, when you came home that night and had set up your dinner in your usual set up, you finally decided to ask. “Can I know your name?”

It took a minute before your squatter decided to respond. ‘ORION-BRIGHT-STAR’.

“Orion’s brightest star?” You say, almost as a question as you pull out your phone to do a quick Google. “Beetlejuice?” You look up to see a fury of pages flying as he quickly makes his way over to the ‘A’ section of the dictionary.

‘AGAIN’

“Beetlejuice?”

The pen slams back down on the page. ‘AGAIN.’

You hesitate. “Beetlejuice?”

There was a crash, a bang, and way too much smoke that filled the room as bright green lights seemed to radiate from outside your house. You cough and wave your hand to clear the smoke from your mouth when you finally hear it.

“Thanks for that babes, I’ve been wanting you to see me for months now.” You blink before you see him. He was-

Cuter than you were expecting. Shorter too. Not the scary man you had envisioned, but rather an adorable guy dressed in arguably way too many stripes, even though it seemed to suit. The green in his hair was vibrant and his whole being seemed to shake with excitement. For the first time in a long time, you didn’t know what to say.

“What’s wrong babes? Cat got your tongue?” He leans in closer to take a better look at you, but all you could focus on was the bright green of his eyes.

“You’re hotter than I imagined.” You heard yourself say before you turn bright, bright red. The grin on his face widens as he chuckles lowly, sending a shiver up your spine.

“Oh babes, we are going to have so much fun.”

[beesandbooks1]

Discussion: Consent in Romance Novels

To begin with, this discussion deserves a CW for discussion of sexual assault, harassment, and rape. I will not be discussing anything explicitly, nor will I really get into any of those topics. But the discussion of consent necessarily approaches the discussion of these things, and I don’t want anyone to be harmed reading this post.

Consent – What do I mean?

Consent can have a lot of meanings (and no I don’t mean this in the ridiculous way people justify assault). Consent can be enthusiastic, understood, discussed previously, discussed in the moment, consistent, well established, fresh, etc. When I’m discussing consent in this post, I mean to include all of these versions of consent. Romance novels often stray into the world of erotica, and necessarily include scenes of BDSM nature, which I will admit to not knowing extensively. This isn’t a post about BDSM though, as I mostly want to touch on historical romance and contemporary romance that don’t feature a lot of sexual scenes.

For some people, consent needs to be enthusiastically given and given multiple times during a sensual or sexual scene. These people withdraw consent if they no longer feel they can enthusiastically agree to moving forward in the act they are participating in. Their silence is their withdrawal of consent. A loving and/or respectful partner would know this (typically through discussion beforehand) and be aware that silence is not a yes.

For others, perhaps due to the nature of the sensual or sexual scene, it isn’t realistic to provide an enthusiastic yes to every new activity or experience. This usually means that they have had a discussion with their partner(s) ahead of time to establish boundaries, determine what word or behavior means “stop” or “no,” and to give explicit consent to certain activities. If there is not a discussion of this beforehand due to spontaneity, this type of consent can be reflected by active participation and reciprocation of activities throughout a scene.

Behaviors that are not consensual

CW: This section addresses behaviors that are romanticized in writing but are not necessarily consensual acts and thus may be harmful for some readers to read.

We all know the tropes. They’re popular in enemies to lovers stories, they’re popular with the “asshole with a heart of gold” trope, and sometimes they’re appealing and other times they’re insidious. What am I talking about? Well, here’s just a sampling:

Using a kiss to shut someone up during an argument

Ignoring a clear and angry “no” because it’s “really a yes”

Forcing kisses upon someone in any situation that is inappropriate

Using sensual/sexual touching in public as a way to distract or mess with someone

Initiating sexual activity with a non-consenting spouse (ie, arranged marriages that ‘must be consummated’) leading to sudden love and/or intimacy

Any kind of real power imbalance in which the partner with the power initiates sensual/sexual activity without consent because they want to

The singular exception to all of these is if there was discussion of the scene beforehand and the partners agreed it would be fun to try and clear consent to initiate such a scene was established. An example of this would be Partner A and Partner B discuss kissing at a public event, believing it would be exciting. Partner A gives Partner B permission to initiate such a kiss at the event even if it seems risky to do so. Partner A at no point says “stop” or “no” or “I don’t want to,” and is enjoying the thrill of the kiss at an inappropriate event.

Why do romance novels have so much trouble with consent?

To be entirely honest, they don’t. There are a lot of romance novels and stories out there written by a diverse group of people. You can easily find stories in which consent is a major factor. On the other hand, there are a lot of novels (and popular ones too) that struggle with the line between an appealingly tense relationship and non-consensual scenes. The sexual tension between enemies, characters with some sort of power imbalance, and forbidden romances can be really well written. However, it seems that a lot of writers don’t seem to know how to walk that line without having moments of non-consent between the characters.

This is insidious in a lot of ways. First of all, there are significant portions of reading populations that idealize romance novels and try to achieve similar interactions in their real lives. If the romance novels they read and idealize include degrees of non-consent, these readers may perceive this as the norm and be taken advantage of due to this. They may be gaslighted without realizing what’s happening and fall into dangerous situations because certain red flags appear to them as green. Predators will absolutely take advantage of someone who sees certain events of non-consent as sexy or romantic, and will use that to push the boundaries even further.

Second, these portrayals go a long way to discredit survivors of assault. If popular culture internalizes non-consensual activities as “normal” and acceptable, then it becomes more difficult for survivors to come forward with their stories. Victims won’t be believed because what they describe, while an act of non-consensual assault or harassment, is also considered “romantic” and so they are told they misunderstood the situation.

Final Thoughts: What can be different?

I think it’s time for romance writers and readers to start owning up to the issues of consent presented in a portion of the body of works out there. There’s no reason for consent to be left out of romance novels. I don’t care what the context is, unless the situation presents as “we have previously discussed roleplaying this situation that includes dubious or nonconsent” then it should not be romanticized. This romanticization can and will be weaponized by predators, by popular culture, and by courts.

Consent is incredibly easy to include. A partner checking in every few minutes, making sure everything is okay, should be normalized. Romance novels in a historical setting can still include consent, and absolutely should. It’s nonsense to portray every sexual encounter in a historical setting as nonconsensual, or borderline assault. It’s also time to stop portraying characters who are clearly predators as romantic and sexy. If you want to tell a story about someone who needs to grow, have them grow before they start assaulting their love interest.

I no longer find I’m able to excuse a lot of this behavior for the sake of reading a story. When consent lines get crossed, I bow out of the book. I hope that other readers will join me in identifying these red flags, putting down the books that have them, and picking up better written stories in which consent is a big part of the romance.

[p4nkow]

You take my breath away - part II

I’m enjoying writing this fic more than I should so here’s the second part! Of course please let me know what you think, I love reading your comments ☕️ 

Part I

As usual while reading this fic you need to pretend that Dominique was given much more space on the storyline, just like to the other love interests of the boys. Of course it is just fiction, even though I tried to make it as realistic as possible. I know it might seem a bit confusing so if you have any questions or if you’d like to let me know what you think of it just know that my DMs and Inbox are always open :) 

Summary: reader has always dreamt of being an actress and she gets the chance of a lifetime when she’s cast as Dominique Beyrand in the infamous biopic about the legend himself, Freddie Mercury. But what will happen when she gets to know better the man who plays his love interest in the movie, Roger Taylor? Will Ben and Y/N’s story be as lucky as the one of characters they portray or will they be starcrossed lovers? Because it happens that things might get complicated because of Ellie, Ben’s long-term girlfriend.

Gif not mine so credit to the owner!

London - December 10th, 2017

To say that Ben was devastated was an understatement. The first week after the breakup had been the worst — he did nothing but focus on work, even a little too much. It was his way to get distracted. And add insult to injury: not only he had broken up with with his long-term girlfriend, but she’d also taken one of the most important things in this world to him — his beagle Frankie. That had crushed him.

During those days you’d gotten closer to him, even more than before. All the free nights in which you weren’t busy filming, he’d come to your trailer. Sometimes the two of you spent hours watching TV-shows on Netflix, sometimes you just talked until late nights.

“Does it tingle somewhere?” Clara — your costume assistant — took a step away from you to admire her work. You hadn’t only the chance to wear that amazing dress, whose brights colours put you in a good mood, but you were also wearing a fake pregnant belly! Back in the early 80s Dominique was pregnant with Felix and her belly was quite evident.

You shook your head ‘no’ to reply at her question and you moved your gaze from her to your reflection in the mirror. The sight of the fake pregnant belly on you made you smile — maybe one day it wouldn’t be just fake.

“You comfy in it?” You went back to looking at Clara by hearing her worried tone, smiling just to reassure her.

“Yeah, it fits”, You said with a small laugh. She quickly nodded and put away the needle she was holding. “It’s beautiful.”

Her cheeks slowly turned rose at your compliment and she smiled at you by giving you a look from above her shoulder. “It’s been made just for you.” And you wouldn’t get used to all that not even in a million years.

The album ‘News of the World’ was softly playing in the background as the two of you finalised the dress. You placed a hand on your fake belly and Clara gave you a look you couldn’t read when the door of the trailer swung open.

You heard loud laughters before hearing Ben say in his deep, hoarse voice “Yeah you probably shouldn’t have done that, mate.”

Both you and Clara turned towards him as soon as he entered the trailer. You were getting used to see him in his Roger clothes so you were a bit surprised when you noticed he was wearing a grey hoodie and black sweatpants. A burning cigarette was resting between his lips, which were a bit parted. He looked at you after closing the door behind him and raised a corner of his lips in a little smile when he noticed what you were wearing.

“No smoking in here!”, Clara immediately said and Ben was forced to move his gaze off you, but you’d already blushed because of the look in his eyes.

He quickly raised his brows as if he had suddenly remembered that rule, putting the cigarette out. “Sorry ma’am.” Then he walked towards you, standing right by your side. “Here’s my wife”, He murmured at you with a smile, looking at you through the mirror. His beautiful face lit up when he grinned at you before placing a quick kiss on your already rose cheek. The wife-thing was kinda of a joke between the two of you but you gained a confused look by Clara.

“What’ve you got there?”, You asked him by noticing the bag he was holding, trying to take the edge off.

He placed his keys on the desk right next to you and took a seat on the couch at your back, forcing you to turn around to look directly at him, immediately meeting his green eyes.

“I’ve been looking for you and Gwil told me you had a fitting.” He was literally sprawled in the sofa and for the first time in days he seemed relaxed. “So I went to grab something to eat.”

Right after finishing putting in order her things, Clara was about to walk out and leave the two of you alone, but then she turned towards you and said “Please, don’t get your dress dirty. I have no desire in struggling to wash away the mayonnaise.” You chuckled and after promising her you wouldn’t, you sat next to Ben and she left.

“Lunch then, huh?”

“Yup”, He replied without looking at you, starting to rummage in the bag before pulling out a sandwich.

You gave him a grateful smile while grabbing it. “And why aren’t we having lunch with the boys?” Not that you minded. At all.

But he misunderstood your tone and quickly looked at you with worry in his eyes. “Oh, ‘m sorry. I thought it might be a good idea being just—”

“Hey, hey, hey. Stop.” You placed a hand on his arm to catch his attention and to stop him from putting away the food. “It is a good idea. It really is, Ben. ‘m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound like if I don’t appreciate it. I do, it’s perfect.” His eyes were fixed on yours while you were talking, desperately trying to convince him.

He cleared his throat and nodded, looking away from you. “I thought it might be a good idea to be just the two of us for a while.”

And you quickly nodded, smiling to reassure him. “It is, Ben. Now gimme that burger, I gotta eat for two by now, y’know”, You joked, placing a hand on your fake belly. He laughed, peeking out his tongue as usual while unwrapping his own sandwich.

It was hard for you to feel comfortable while wearing it and Ben noticed it. “You comfy?” He asked with his brows narrowed and you groaned in response so he chuckled and patted on his lap. “Place your legs here, love.”

You tried to ignore that nickname and you gave him a surprised look. He softly murmured “C’mon” and nodded as to confirm his proposal, so you did.

“Thanks”, You murmured while lowering your gaze to your sandwich, somehow managing to unwrap it. You could still feel his gaze on you and then, after taking a bite of his burger, he murmured in an amused tone “You still blush? After all this time?”

“Oh c’mon” You groaned. To be completely honest you hadn’t even noticed that your cheeks’d turned slightly red. “I’m not blushing.”

“Oh yeah, you are.” He softly laughed while grazing his bottom lip.

“Fuck off”, You replied while playfully pushing him away, causing him to laugh even harder.

“So”, He started after a few moments of silence. “You always wanted to be an actress?“

You slowly nodded while wiping away your mouth. “Yeah, but I also had a plan B.”

“Which was...?”

“Being an astronaut.” And Ben laughed. Hard. With a deep, sexy sound which made you feel things.

“Seriously? And how would you do that?”

“I swear! I always told my mum that if I didn’t succeed as an actress then I would’ve been an astronaut. And”, You said in an amused tone, trying not to burst into laughter because of the look in Ben’s face. “I was bloody sure I would be the one to take the first step on Mars.”

Ben peeked out his tongue while smiling, which was something he often did and to which you were getting used to. “You’ve always dreamt big, love.”

You felt shivers running down your spine when you felt his hand gently caress your bare knee. He seemed to notice the surprised look in your eyes but he didn’t move it away.

You gave him a thankful smile when he extended you the Coke. “I wanted to be a rugby player.”

“Really? What did stop you?”

He shrugged and slipped his hands through his hair — which was getting longer, you happily noticed — to drive it off his face. “Got a lot of injuries and I couldn’t play anymore. A friend of mine invited me to a drama club and the rest is history.”

And since that day you looked at him from a different light ‘cause when you raised your gaze to meet his, the things you felt by looking at his green eyes were completely new to you. And you were terrified.

London - December 15th, 2017

“One, two, three, four... year, now the hand.”

“Like that?”

It was your last day of shooting and Joe had insisted to teach you the BaB dance. You were a terrible dancer but God, you were having so much fun!

“Y/N is a better dancer than you, mate.” Joe gave Gwil a death stare, causing you to chuckle. The truth was, you couldn’t take Joe seriously when in his Live Aid look. That day you were filming some scenes pre-performance and it meant to finally have some scenes with the rest of the boys, too.

You winked at Gwilym while trying to imitate Joe’s moves, who said “We’re gonna talk about it when I’m gonna win Dancing with the stars.”

You bursted into laughter and Gwil shook his head in amusement. “In your dreams, maybe.”

“Okay, maybe I got it.” Joe gave you an excited look by hearing your words .

“Let’s film it, then! Gwil?”

“Yeah, mate”, He replied. You took your huge coat off and moved closer to Joe. Gwil was ready to film it, phone in hands and an amused look on his face.

And you nailed every move except for the last one — Joe was supposed to raise a leg and place it on your joined hands but you lost your balance and the two of you almost fell to the ground.

You heard Gwil laughing hard and the shocked look Joe’s face cracked you up, forcing you to sit on the ground while trying to take deep breaths between a laugh and the other.

“D’ya still think she’s better than me?”, Joe asked Gwil in an amused tone.

Breathless, you tried to apologise to him when your gaze fell on what was happening a few trailers away. Ben and Ellie were one right in front of the other and they were clearly arguing. Ben threw his arms in the air and Ellie’s ones were crossed on her chest, but she stomped her feet in anger.

“You okay?”, Gwil asked you, noticing you were still laying on the ground. You forced yourself to look away from them and you faked a smile, taking the hand Joe was extending you to get up.

“Yeah”, You murmured, adjusting the folds of your dress.

Joe was uploading the video on Instagram — fail included — when Ben joined you. He was clearly upset — his breath heavy and the veins on his hands were now more evident.

“‘s everything okay, mate?” He moved his gaze to Gwil by hearing his question and quickly nodded, murmuring a soft “Yeah.”

Joe looked at him first and then at you, so you insisted. “You sure?”

“Fucking hell, I said I’m fine!”

His harsh words made you blink in surprise and flinch. The anger in his face left place to regret, his features relaxing as he took a step towards you.

“Ben”, You heard Joe say as a warning while he started to say “Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”

But you were too humiliated and hurt to hear his apologies, so you vaguely gestured towards the trailers and said “I’ll go look for Lucy.”

“Y/N.” His voice was now low and hoarse; he even tried to grab your wrist when you walked past him but you avoided his touch. He seemed hurt by your rejection and you heard him murmur “Fuck.” You were sure you heard the boys whisper something, too but you couldn’t catch their words.

You tried to hold back tears while you walked towards Lucy’s trailer and you spent most of the remaining free time you had before filming in her and Priya’s company.

Lucy noticed there was something wrong with you so you smiled to reassure her when you caught her staring at you.

Your phone buzzed when you got a new message and you knew who it was from even before reading the name of the contact: it was from Ben.

“I’m so, so sorry. Please talk to me”, It read.

Pointless to say that you ignored him for the rest of the day.

London - December 16th, 2017

It was a Saturday night and it was the day after your last day of shooting and your little spat with Ben, too.

All the cast members were heading home for the Christmas break but before doing so, you were spending a night together for a few drinks. You’d have loved to get ready for the night with Lucy, but she was more than busy with Rami. It pushed you to pick your outfit by yourself and that’s probably why it took you a whole afternoon.

You went for a red sweater with a black tartan skirt matched with black, hugh boots. And you spent at least 45 minutes to convince yourself to walk out from your flat.

Anxiety was eating you alive during the drive — you were so nervous that you didn’t even hear the uber when he asked you something.

“I’m sorry?”

He gave you a look through the rearview mirror. “Aren’t you an actress?”

You shyly smiled at him. “I guess I am, yeah.”

He proudly smiled and it was a new thing for you to be recognised by people. “My little girl’s obsessed with you and that boy, Ben-something.”

“Hardy?”, You suggested and he quickly nodded.

“Yeah, she’s way too excited for that movie of yours.”

And his words made you incredibly happy. “What’s your daughter’s name?”

“Juliet.” And the pride in his voice made you smile even wider.

“Then please tell Juliet I say hello and that I hope she’ll love the movie.”

“I will. Thank you, miss.”

You got to the pub shortly after. The music wasn’t as loud as you thought it’d be and luckily it wasn’t even that crowded.

“You’re late.” You hadn’t noticed Lucy walking towards you until when she grabbed you by your arm, giving you the biggest of the smiles.

“And you’re definitely in a good mood. Does Rami have something to do with it?” She gave you a shocked but amused look while she led you to your table.

“Maybe.” It was nice to see how quickly things had escalated between them — you still remembered the looks they exchanged during the very first table read.

“Naughty girl.”

“Hey, Y/N!” Gwil waved at you and you noticed he was the only one sitting at the table. You gave him a smile and sat right next to him while Lucy took seat in front of you. “Am I really late or Lucy’s just being too dramatic?”, You asked him as you got comfy in your seat. To be honest he looked nice and you noticed that glasses looked really good on him.

“Given that it’s just the four of us for now...” He left his sentence incomplete.

“Four?” The math didn’t work, given that you’d only seen him and Lucy.

“Rami’s in the toilet”, Lucy explained.

“Oh, right.”

“‘xcuse me”, She suddenly said, trying to catch the attention of the waiter. “Could we please have four margarita’s?”

“Aren’t we gonna wait for the others?” You asked and she moved her gaze to you at your question. You were glad Ben wasn’t there yet — you had still time to think how to act around him.

“It’s not like we’re having just those margaritas. Think of it as a warm-up.”

Gwil stopped humming the song that was playing on the background and said “She’s terrible when it comes to alcohol.”

“Hey, Y/N!” You stood up to greet Rami before he took his place right next to Lucy. You started to relax as the four of you started to chat and Priya arrived shortly after. Turns out you weren’t late all.

But suddenly your phone started to ring so you excused yourself and you got out of the room to get Laura’s phone-call.

You started to walk back and forth in the sidewalk as you spoke with her, making plans for the upcoming week when you felt someone tapping on your shoulder.

You turned around just to see Ben and your lips parted in surprise when you gave him a better look. He was wearing a black leather jacket with a white shirt and and dark jeans and damn — he looked good.

You raised your index finger as to tell him to wait a second. “I gotta go, I’ll see you in the morning. Yeah, mom. Bye.” And you were secretly hoping Ben didn’t hear the comments she made about him.

“Hey”, He said as soon as you hung off the phone. You gave him a little smile and raised your chin to meet his gaze. “Hey.”

You could feel yourself blush when you felt his eyes raking his body. “You look good.”

You bit your lower lip at his words, his eyes instantly coming into contact with yours. “You do, too.”

There was some tension you could cut with a knife. Ben cleared his throat and gave a quick look at the people surrounding you. “Can we move to somewhere more private? I need to talk to you.”

And when you nodded he gently grabbed your hand and led you to an alley right next to the pub. To say that you were nervous was an understatement. You just hoped your hand wouldn’t get sweaty.

But your concerns were unnecessary because he let go of your hand while placing himself right in front of you. You already missed his touch — his hand, so big compared to yours, made you feel safe, somehow.

His eyes had a completely different shade under the street lamp. “I wanted to apologise for yesterday. I’m so bloody sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped like that.”

You crossed your arms in your chest and lowered your gaze for a few moments before looking back at him. “It’s okay”, You softly said.

“No, it’s not”, He replied with his brows narrowed. You heard him taking a deep breath and then he came closer to you. “When I saw the look in your face... I hated that it was because of me. I’m so, so sorry, love.”

“It’s just...” You started to say and he gave you a nod as to tell you to keep going. “If you’ve problems with her just don’t take it out on us — me and the boys.”

“You’re completely right, love. I shouldn’t have done that.”

There were a few moments of silence. When you met again his eyes you could easily feel that the atmosphere had suddenly changed. You noticed the bob of his Adam’s apple, the way he bit his bottom lip — which was something he did often, but in that moment it had a completely different effect on you.

And by the was he was staring at you and by his body language, you knew what came next. The anticipation made your breath become heavier and the look he had in his eyes made your toes curl.

The two of you leaned in sync, his hand placed on your cheek as to gently caress it. When his soft lips collided harshly with yours you let out a little moan, but then you kissed him back, deepening the kiss as your tongue met his. It tasted like mint and cigarettes.

His hand moved to your hip and the two of you recoiled, your back hitting the wall. You placed both your hands on his neck, caressing it before letting your fingers slip through his hair. You couldn’t put in words what you were feeling in that moment — his touch, so secure yet so gentle, sent little tremors to your lower abdomen, making you crave for more.

But then you started to overthink.

What if it’s too soon?

What if he’s not really interested in you?

But especially, what if he’s doing it just to forget Ellie?

And your concerns came true when your kiss was interrupted by the ringing of his phone. He backed away from your lips by placing in them a last, gentle kiss before murmuring in a low voice “Shit.”

You were sure your cheek were by now bright red. He took his phone from his back pocket, his breath still heavy. There was no need for you to read the contact’s name to know who it was. You got it from the look he gave you before answering the call.

And your heart sank anyway when you heard him say “Ellie?”

You looked away from him, feeling even more humiliated than the previous day. His eyes were fixed on yours, trying to catch your reaction and full of concern. “What? Hell, no. Calm down, I’ll be right there.”

You lowered your gaze, crossing again your arms in your chest. “Fuck”, He murmured under his breath. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I really gotta go.” He sounded desperate as he tried to meet your gaze and you limited yourself to just nod at his words.

He started to recoil from you, swearing again under his breath. He slipped a hand through his hair while saying “I’ll call you in the morning, alright?”

And that’s when you couldn’t take it anymore. “No, don’t bother.”

He gave you a surprised look by hearing your words. “What?”

You took a step towards him, your face a few inches away from his. Even though you had a know in your throat and you were deeply hurt, you managed to seem unbothered. “I don’t wanna be with someone who’s not 100% with me — mind, body and heart. And you clearly aren’t and can’t be.”

You walked away from him under his gaze, which was closely following your movements in regret and disbelief. Ben Hardy couldn’t be give you a 100% ‘cause his heart still belonged to someone else.

Taglist: @caborhapch @ohtheseboysilove @classy-fangirl @royalblueviper @rogers-weirdo @geek-and-proud @mrsbenhardyx @julessbrown @the-little-warbler  @bouncingjoe @benders-diamond-earring @radiob-l-a-hblah @luvborhap

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[queenofallthewrongchoices]

And He Lets the Chips Fall Where They May

Series: The Freshman  

Synopsis: This fic takes place in The Freshman book 1 in between chapters 15 and 16. I’ve been replaying The Freshman over for the hundredth time and always wanted a better glimpse at what the conversation between Chris and Becca was like when he suddenly realized that he wanted to go to the winter formal with the MC instead of her, so this is my take on that conversation. 

Pairing: Chris x MC (Nadia)

Characters: Chris and Becca with mentions of the MC

No real age restrictions but there is some very mild suggestive language

Author’s Note: While writing has been a long-time hobby of mine, this is the first fanfic I’ve ever written and the first time I’ve written a piece work featuring characters that aren’t mine. I know it’s both lengthy and wordy but I tend to write how I talk so forgive me. 

Chris walks up the steps of the large sorority house he’d been residing in for the past couple of months, he can’t help but notice an uneasiness weighing down on him. While his heart was never truly in any of his dealings with Becca, he had convinced himself it was inconsequential because it was all in the name of having a good time. It was his first semester of freshman year, after all, and he was only interested in cutting loose, unwinding, and forgetting she who shall not be named. Trying his best to avoid anything serious at all costs. Admittedly so Becca, in a lot of ways, provided that for him. She was a little older and more experienced, so she often took the reins in their “relationship” in all aspects, which was new yet exciting. Or at least it had been.

Any other guy would’ve been overjoyed at the prospect of shacking up in a sorority house with a bunch of beautiful carefree college girls, and at first, he himself was quite delighted by the notion. But for some reason Chris couldn’t shake the thought of one specific girl who had charmed him from the very first moment he had laid eyes on her. He kept telling himself that it was for the best that he kept his distance. He wasn’t ready for a relationship and he didn’t want to hurt her any more than he already had. That was all true, and yet his mind continued to wander to what seemed to be a far-off reality of them being happy together.

He decided to put those thoughts to rest for the time being as he knocked on the large oak doors of the Kappa house. Becca had texted him excited about the dresses she had purchased for the big winter formal scheduled for that weekend and wanted his opinion since he was her date. “It’s important that we make a statement together as a couple.” She said. A concept that he thought he left behind in high school but he didn’t question it. He didn’t question much, as of late. He was just going with the flow. No expectations. Just fun. But his lackadaisical attitude seemed to be leading him towards real relationship territory with Becca and that was something he didn’t like. Although he had made it quite clear to Becca that he wasn’t interested in defining their relationship now or any moment in the future, she still felt an ownership over him. And could he really blame her? He had been sleeping in her bed on and off for the past several weeks, he had drunkenly admitted to her some heavy things concerning his dad he hadn’t told anyone, and they’d been engaging in all manners of hooking up over that time frame. So yes, she wasn’t wrong to have expectations of what they were becoming. But still the whole thing was uncomfortable for him. Here he was, Mr. Hypocrite, doing all the things he said he didn’t want with a girl he knew he didn’t want them with.

Suddenly the door swung open, pulling him from his thoughts as he was greeted by a familiar redhead who he saw regularly during his visits to the Kappa house. She was a sophomore who was dating one of the upperclassmen football players named Reggie. Her name was either Amber or Cassidy. He could never seem to remember despite her constantly reminding him. He was ashamed to admit it but all the Kappa girls sort of meshed together these days, none of them having any real distinguishable personalities, at least not to him.

“Oh, hey Chris. I should’ve known it was you. Becca’s upstairs in her room.” She said in a loud sing-songy voice. She seemed tipsy undoubtedly pregaming for some party, kickback, or another.  “Hey, thanks.” He said as he walked in. She answered with a smile and nod then returned to her awaiting pre-party cocktails and friends, more members of the sorority he recognized, all huddled around the island in the kitchen.

Her familiar greeting was another thing that didn’t sit right with him. He had become too much of a staple in the house. Football players frequenting the Kappa house wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. Oddly enough it was sort of tradition at Hartfeld. The politics surrounding the dating scene amongst the Kappas and the football team reminded him of that of the Pink Ladies and the T-Birds from Grease. The Kappas were the football players’ girls and vice versa. They had first dibs on one another and everyone else, meaning the rest of the Hartfeld population, had to get in line. Even with that knowledge he still felt conflicted. Was Becca at her core truly a cool girl to be around and very different from the off-putting stuck up persona she portrayed to the general public? Yes, unbelievably so. But his heart just wasn’t in it. A fact that was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. Regardless there was no point in dwelling on it. He turned and closed the door before heading up the winding stairs leading to Becca’s room.  

And before he knew it there he was. Standing outside Becca’s bedroom door glancing at the jewel encrusted “B” that adorned it. It was so regal and so Becca. Hanging from the doorknob was a yellow sign fashioned after a yellow light indicating to anyone seeking entry into her room that they should “Slow down and knock first”. She also had a green one that read “Go ahead and come in” and a red one that read “Stop. Don’t even think about it.” The red one was only used if she wasn’t in the mood to deal with whatever petty squabble her sorors had found themselves in or when she was trying to set the mood with someone in particular, that someone being him as of late.  

One knock was all it took before he was greeted by the stunning leggy blond. He couldn’t help but admit that Becca was indeed gorgeous. She was attractive in an obvious and conventional way. When he first met Becca, he couldn’t help but think that she looked like your typical mean girl that served as a foil to the female lead in a classic young adult comedy film. She immediately pulled him into a hug and gave him a quick peck on the lips before she ushered him into her room. “There you are. Finally. I’ve been dying to show you the dresses I picked out.”

The room that was normally so neatly put together looked like a department store after a huge weekend sale. Scattered around the room were a different assortment of dresses of varying lengths and colors.

“I admit that I may have went a little overboard at the mall but they all looked so cute on me. Luckily you get to watch me model them and help me decide which one best compliments my amazing body.”

“Can’t wait.” He chuckled to himself. Becca was definitely the most high maintenance girl he’d ever met. He didn’t mind though. It was something he found charming about her believe it or not.

“Good. I’ll try this red number on first. Red always looks good on me. Something I’m sure you can agree with.” She says flirtatiously. She gives him a devilish wink and scurried to her closet to change.

While he waited, Chris pulled up his Pictogram account mindlessly scrolling to pass the time. His fingers landed on one post from Nadia that cost his attention. The caption read, “Throwback to last summer visiting family in Miami. The sun was good to me that day.” And there she was, sporting the most brilliant smile he’d ever seen on her. Her eyes were closed, face tilted up toward the setting sun as it cast an angelic glow across her features. Her brown skin was a couple shades darker than usual undoubtedly tanned from being out in the sun. Her wavy hair was longer here. It cascaded in waves over her shoulders and down her back with a complimentary red flower tucked neatly above her right ear. She looked breathtaking. That was the only way to describe it. He stared at the picture for what seemed to be an eternity memorizing every little detail. Completely and utterly captivated.

“Ahem. Chris I said what do you think?” Becca said in a familiar annoyed tone. He was so distracted that he hadn’t realized that she had returned to the main room let alone that she was talking to him.

“Oh, my bad Becca. You look great.” He said slightly embarrassed sitting up a little straighter in his seat. And she did honestly. The dress was an off the shoulder long flowing gown that hugged her figure in all the right places. Although Chris’ compliment was mostly genuine he still couldn’t help but notice how flat it sounded to his own ears. He only hoped that Becca didn’t notice.

“Boys.” She said in a dismissive yet playful manner. “I know you’re only interested in what’s underneath it.” She said. “Oh well I still have an assortment of gowns to try on so you’re just going to have to fake interest Mr. Powell. I promise I’ll make it worth your while later.” She gave him a smirk that otherwise would’ve been sexy if his mind wasn’t elsewhere and grabbed a strapless black dress to try on next.

While she changed, his thoughts began to wander once more. This time he thought about the formal and wondered if Nadia was going and if so with who. James no doubt. They had been spending a lot of time together lately and they were obviously attracted to each other. James was indeed an attractive guy. He was secure enough to admit it. Honestly James was an ideal match for just about any girl especially Nadia. He was good-looking, studious, a real gentleman, slightly older so more mature, and rich. What’s not to like? They seemed to have a lot in common. Way more than he had with her anyways.

This whole line of thinking made him feel guilty and a little hypocritical because here he was making plans to go to the formal with Becca and he was worried about who Nadia, a girl he rejected, was spending her free time with. But he couldn’t help it because deep down he knew that she was the one he wanted to be with. The chemistry they had was undeniable. Anyone who had ever been around them long enough commented on it. But he was afraid. Of what at this point? He was no longer sure. All his past reasons now seemed like mere excuses.

Becca modeled gown after gown each one more gorgeous than the last but her indecision began to set in as she started to retry on certain dresses that exuded the right amount of elegance and sex appeal. Or so she phrased it.

“There all cute I suppose but it has to be perfect.” She says in a huff becoming annoyed with her own indecision. “Have you already rented your tux? You don’t seem to be concerned with what you’re wearing.”

“Yeah. I still have the one from the sorority ball.”

She scoffs and shakes her head. “Boys. I swear you guys have it so easy. Here I am indecisively picking through a dozen dresses to wear and you’re simply settling on a tux that you’ve already worn. Luckily it looks so good on you.” She says flirtatiously once more.

At this point, Chris had grown tired in both a literal and mental sense of this entire conversation. It had been two hours of watching Becca model dresses for him and the more he thought about it the less the whole idea of going to formal with her interested him.

Nadia had been consuming his thoughts all night long. Her smile, her laugh, the way she cocked her head to the side when she talked to him. He could no longer ignore what he was feeling. It was quite simple. He wanted to go to the formal with her.

He wanted to see her in a beautiful gown with an expertly made up face just for him. He wanted to hold her on the dance floor, swaying to some romantic R&B hit while the world faded around them, and he wanted to close the night out with her peacefully laying her gorgeous head on his chest as the collective sounds of their heartbeats lulled each other to sleep. And it pained him to think that James or anyone else could possibly experience those things in his place.

Becca continued to make mindless conversation regarding the formal in the background as he finally came to the realization that he had known all along.

“Becca, I can’t do this.” He said.

“Oh fine. I’ll just ask Madison to help me. I should’ve known that as a guy you wouldn’t be all that interested. It’s fine. Just help me out of this dress and maybe we can go grab a bite eat.”

“No. I mean…” He hesitated. “I mean I can’t go to formal with you.”

His words seemed to echo shortly followed by an immediate uncomfortable silence as they stared at one another. Becca’s expression was completely unreadable. No trace of sadness or anger. Just completely blank. Maybe there was a taste of confusion mixed in but he wasn’t completely sure. He began to avoid her gaze.

She eventually broke the silence with a long and exasperated sigh saying, “Well are you going to at least give me an explanation or continue sitting there with that dumb look on your face? And please don’t tell me this has anything to do with that skinny, fashion-challenged freshman.” And there it was anger and annoyance perfectly mingling together across her features.

He hated having to admit that her assertion was correct but lying would be an insult to them both at this point.

He nodded with an apologetic look and began to say, “Sorry. I don’t mean to hurt you or anything. I just…”

“Oh please.” She cuts him off. “Just go. Whatever pointless thing you’re about to say next you can keep. Your energy is better spent on whatever crackpot apology you’re going to run by Nadia.” She gives him an unfazed look undoubtedly to mask the hurt and embarrassment she feels and walks back towards her closet to change out of her gown.

Chris stands there a little while longer debating on whether he should go try to apologize once more or leave. He settles on the latter. Becca’s anger was justified and he felt like crap doing this to her, but more than anything he felt a greater sense of urgency to get to Nadia and try to salvage what was left of their relationship. If he could even call it that.

He hurriedly dashed down the steps and out the door towards his car. He drove as fast as the speed limit would allow towards the parking lot of the freshman dorms. All he could do at this point was hope and pray that he wasn’t too late.

[mirandagoing4baroque]

Field of Streams: Ariodante, in Concert, While Making Lasagna

The English Concert was supposed to perform Rodelinda in concert at Carnegie Hall on May 3rd 2020. Obviously they did not. In some ways I am lucky--if the Met hadn’t done Agrippina I might have made plans come to New York to see Rodelinda instead. It wouldn’t be unprecedented. In fact, in 2014, I finally got to call in an IOU over a decade old. As I mentioned on this blog, when I was in kindergarten and first heard Alcina, I managed to get my father to promise to take me to see Alcina live whenever it came to the east coast. And more than twenty years later we finally got to see the English Concert perform it in concert in Carnegie Hall. In the intervening years there was a debate about whether Toronto counted as the east coast, but my father insisted that he had only meant the east coast of the United States. And when the English Concert brought Ariodante on tour in 2017 they were kind enough to take the show to the Kennedy Center which was considerably more convenient.

As a replacement for the aforementioned cancelled Rodelinda concert, they streamed a recording of the Ariodante in Concert recorded at and live streamed from Carnegie Hall in 2017. As I mentioned above, I was lucky enough to see this concert at the Kennedy Center when it was touring, and I also watched the stream at the time, and then I rewatched it when it was streamed again this past weekend (twice, I regret nothing). So I am, shall we say, intimately familiar with this production.

Opera in concert is an interesting phenomena. I’ve seen three operas in concert (Alcina, Ariodante, Zelmira) and a few others that were only ‘semi-staged’ (Don Giovanni 2x, Radamisto, Giulio Cesare at Boston Baroque). Well, Miranda, you say, “the monkey paw has curled, and you got what you wished for in the Acis and Galatea review, an opera stripped of any ‘razzle dazzle’ or distractions. So, can the emotional drama stand alone?” On this subject I cannot speak for anyone other than myself but I believe it can and it does. I am sure that there are those for whom the grand sets and costumes are an integral part of the experience, and that is a legitimate position to take, but not one to which I ascribe.

However, especially in these times, watching operas in concert (stay tuned for my review of the Boston Baroque Agrippina stream) makes me think about what the bare essentials of opera are. The sets and costumes are fun, sure, and all other things being equal, I would rather have sets and costumes and the full spectacle. And they can cover a multitude of sins. It is far more difficult to create an entertaining production when it is just the orchestra, the singers, and an empty stage. But this production is, to me, as moving as some fully staged productions I’ve seen. So what is the immutable core of these operas? What is it that I am searching for when I am “Going for Baroque?”

The value I find in opera is as an emotional touchstone. This is not a novel concept, and I am not the first, or even the thousandth to think it. Why it is Baroque Opera for me and Jazz or R&B for you, I cannot say,* but when I hear this music performed well my heart (or my soul, or my grey matter, or whatever the thing is that is that feels the feels) stirs in response. So what I am looking for when I am going to an opera is not a spectacle. I am looking for a conflict that put the characters through a variety of feelings, music that is performed with care in a baroque style, and singers and musicians who will sing or play with pathos, so I can have the transcendental experience of sharing an emotional response with a room of strangers, and most importantly, with my father. We have been watching many of the same streams, and sharing our thoughts over the telephone but it’s not the same as sitting next to him in a hushed auditorium and seeing, out of the corner of my eye, a small small creep across his face as the horns come in because he knows they are my favorite. I am counting down the days until we can share this again.

But enough philosophizing. Let’s review the stream. So we know the standard, how did this production measure up? Well, I watched it four times, so that’s a hint. In fact as to music performed in the Baroque style, this performance could be considered a gold standard (of course along with the Glyndebourne Giulio Cesare). I am such a sucker for period instruments. To my ear the difference between Baroque Opera performed with and without period instruments is the difference between your average red wine vinegar, and an expensive aged balsamic. The red wine vinegar is fine, but the aged balsamic has a far more interesting, layered, intense flavor. This is especially true with respect to brass, where the natural horn is basically a completely different instrument from the french horn. The English Concert has never once disappointed me. Harry Bicket is always a master of the correct tempo, but in this concert, the flowing dance rhythms that undergird the arias really shone.

So next up we have a drama that puts the characters through a variety of feelings. If you need a refresher on the plot of Ariodante, I covered it earlier here (and if you’re too lazy to click the link, think the Hero/Claudius plot from Much Ado About Nothing), but there is no debating that it certainly takes the characters on a roller coaster of emotional situations. The stellar cast dug deeply into the libretto and squeezed every drop of feeling from Handel’s brilliant arias. Ariodante was composed when Handel was at the peak of his operatic abilities and it contains some of his most sublime music. 

Mirroring the tasteful stylings of the orchestra the cast had subtle but effective ornamentations in the da capo sections that elevated the theme but did not obscure it (no mean feat in such arias as “Dopo Notte”).  The King of Scotland was played by Matthew Brook, who I do not believe I had seen before and nor have I seen him since. I really enjoyed his performance and he was an especially capable actor. He leaned into the paternal aspects of the role, and I found his emotional arc quite moving. David Portillo was a wonderful Lurcanio, and I still hope to see him again in something (hint, hint, DC directors). I particularly enjoyed his “Tu Vivi.”  In this aria Lurcanio tries to dissuade his brother Ariodante from choosing suicide after seeing a woman they believe (incorrectly) to be Ginevra let a man into her rooms. It is often sung in a rage, which allows for blistering speed and impressive displays of vocal prowess, but in David Portillo’s interpretation, it was a desperate plea to save his brother's life. By toning the aria down a notch, he accessed some very interesting interpersonal and emotional drama that added novel layers to a familiar aria.

This was my first time hearing Sonia Prina live, but I had fallen in love with her voice on many Baroque recordings. She has a wonderful vibrancy and fluidity  in her lower register, which is particularly critical for women playing Polinesso, in my opinion. Sometimes they can sound a little stilted in the low runs, but she had full power and flexibility. I also appreciated her aesthetic. The punk rock bad guy Polinesso she portrayed was believable as a love interest for Dalinda, and as a villain. It is not her fault that Polinesso’s arias are all a little one note (think Iago’s extensive monologues in Othello).

I absolutely adored Mary Bevan’s Dalinda. I hadn’t heard her prior to this concert, and I eagerly await my next opportunity (still waiting......). She was believable as a young woman who fell in love with the wrong manipulative man and made a mistake. I loved her portrayal of the rising horror throughout the second half as she realized what was going on. I always love "Neghittosi, or voi che fate?", the aria where she calls on the heavens to strike down the man who wronged her, but I found her interpretation to be a particularly affecting vision of female empowerment and rejecting the notion that she was culpable, and laying the blame squarely at the feet of Polinesso, where it belongs.

This was also my introduction to Christiane Karg, who was a vocal standout as Ginevra. I would have liked a little more emotion from her, but, as I’ve acknowledged above, I like my Handel drama cranked to eleven, so that may just be personal preference. Regardless of the acting, her singing was note-perfect and I have no real complaints.

Which brings us at last to Joyce DiDonato. Her performance in this production is one of my most treasured concert memories, and the kind of magic you are just grateful to bear witness to. Any performance of “Scherza Infida” is a miracle of acting and vocal stamina. As I said in my last review of Ariodante, the song is 12 minutes long, and contains four lines of distinct lyrics. To hold the audience’s attention with no prancing dancers in nude bodysuits, with only your voice and the music--that is a gift. But you can google reviews of this production and read critics who know far more about this than I do raving about her “Scherza Infida” and her “Dopo Notte.” I want to talk about the redheaded stepchild of Ariodante’s third act arias “"Cieca notte." This is the moment when Ariodante learns that he was fooled--that he was betrayed by his beloved, that in fact he has betrayed her. (Apparently I have a thing for arias in which Handelian heros realize they have been fooled, see also, “Mi Lusinga” from Alcina) To watch her sing this aria, and to see the distinct waves of realization rolling across Ariodante’s soul as the aria progresses is to watch a master at work. I will at some point write up my magnum opus on how, when properly performed, da capo arias should replicate the structure of the Hegelian Dialectic, but that is a problem for another day.

So there it is, how you can strip away all but the absolute essential bits from an opera and still have a dynamic, dramatic, engrossing evening (even when you’ve seen the thing three times already). Because for me, I got what I needed out of it. I felt that resonance in my soul. I found a little comfort in these times. It’s no replacement for live opera, but it soothed a bit my parched throat. Okay, I lied, I do have a few things to say about “Dopo Notte.” Ever since I watched this stream, I’ve been listening to “Dopo Notte,” the bravura aria Ariodante sings at the end of the show, rejoicing in his reunion with Genevra, almost every day, because it is the tonic I need during these times (you can listen here if you think it might be the tonic your soul needs too). It is a promise I make to myself; permission to let myself hope. A promise that the sun will shine again, that these dark and stormy waters will not drag us under, and that someday I will sit next to my father in a dark opera house, and we will once again share in the experience of Handel’s glorious music.

“After a dark night, the sun shines in the heavens and fills the world with joy...”

*It was definitely the brainwashing.