#powerpoint slide show

[hailsatanacab]

A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc

"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."

"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.

"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.

"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"

"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.

"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."

"This is where I live."

"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"

"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"

"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."

"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."

"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."

"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"

"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"

"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"

"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"

"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"

"Please, call me Bruce."

"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."

Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.

"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."

[fist-of-vengeance]

last night for my birthday i forced my friends to listen to an hour and a half long powerpoint explaining the entire lost timeline in chronological order. i know lost is a pretty zany show but nothing makes you realize this more than trying to verbally explain time travel and the sideways universe to three people who've never seen it

[kradogsrats]

Claudia, when your dad left us, he was a changed man. He found peace. He found his truth.

👏 LET 👏 ME 👏 HAVE 👏 THIS 👏

[stolenkissesdiaz]

hey, so like buck buckley would dox, report, and virtually/verbally kill u all without a second thought for talking shit about eddie btw. even so much as an implication eddie is mean or bad or whatever and he’s telling u to kys and sending u a paragraph why ur wrong before reporting ur acc as soon as he sees u saw his msg btw. i’m saying he would hate you all.

[r-aindr0p]

🙏

[daily-hanamura]

[neighbourhoodtwo]

guy with a special interest voice does anyone. want to see my ranking of versions of sextus pompey in tv and film

[aventuras-de-andre]

cas catching bobby up on tfw’s post s7 bullshit before dean shows up in heaven

[wrishwrosh]

the vaster wilds has the typical goodreads problem of all the negative reviews just being “this book was gross and sad and nothing happened :((“ “the prose was stylized and hard to understand”” but as a gross sad stylized prose enjoyer these critiques do not get to the MEAT of all the evils herein present

- the problem of the enlightened protagonist, where a character who has nominally lived in the real historical past until the book begins and yet somehow manages to individually develop a 21st century twitter-educated perspective on colonialism, god, and nature. classic groffism nothing new

- remember that tweet about how hiking is a bourgeois affectation and indigenous people never hiked before colonization. imagine if that was the premise of an entire novel. written by somebody who went to amherst

- another classic groffism is taking a real historical figure about whom almost nothing is known and constructing a history for them that can’t technically be ruled out as impossible given the dearth of records but IS ahistorical, implausible, and kind of stupid while also making sure that the one thing that is concretely known about this person is weirdly and smugly deemphasized in the narrative. in this case the historical figure is “jane” the anonymous teenage girl whose remains were found at jamestown exhibiting signs of butchering. the cannibalism is treated as a twist ending which is dumb as hell and made the pacing insanely frustrating as this was obvious from the beginning to any true jamestownheads in the audience. also the cannibalism of a young woman seems like an obvious place of exploration for a novel nominally about the exigencies of subsistence survival and how hard it was to be a girl in the dark ages before second wave feminism but what do i know. obviously you should just kind of shoehorn it in as a gotcha in the last 20 pages serving as the millionth indication that the bad guys in this narrative are bad and do bad things

- speaking of the bad guys every single character aside from the narrator is a one dimensional paper doll present to essentially speak one of groffs points directly into camera and then vanish in a way that literally made me laugh out loud several times. Some Women Are Vain, Which Is Bad. Some Men Hurt Women And Native People For Fun, Which Is Evil.

- there was a stylistic decision made to not capitalize proper nouns which sure. it makes sense with what the book is trying to do to not capitalize god or english or powhatan. but then it was so inconsistently applied like why is atlantic (ocean) not capitalized but James (river) is. why is god lowercase but Sunday is uppercase. why are all the names capitalized but titles that function as names arent. stop the madness

- a personal nitpick now but i have spent a lot of time kicking around in the area where the book is set and was hoping at least there would be some evocative descriptions of this place that i love. and yet in this book nominally about wilderness there was so little specificity in the depiction of it! this could have been any forest! the specific natural setting did not feel like a tidewater forest! feels like groff wrote it based on a google search of pamunkey traditional lifestyles and a glance at a topographic map

- cant even get into all the reductive and underresearched gender stuff but know it’s there. classic groffism

- finally and most minimally yet perhaps most egregiously groff has yet again failed to internalize a religious worldview in order to write a religious character. this narrator is a change from marie in matrix as we are sternly informed on page 4 that she believes what she has been told about christianity. like once every 20 pages groff remembers that and has her pray or something and then once she has been away from her culture for about 200 pages she realizes god is a lie and that’s the arc. cool!

- why bother! why bother with this setting, this character, this real place and real historical event and real belief system, if you arent going to USE any of it. this should have been a zine about climate change. it should have been like six tweets. if it needed to be fiction (and im not convinced it did) it should have been a contemporary novel and like three things could have been changed. why! bother!

in summary, i went so insane that i googled every single person mentioned in the acknowledgements to see how many were historians or archaeologists or librarians or ecologists or associates of the pamunkey tribe or anyone else who might be assumed to have expertise here and there was: one. illustrative i think!!!!

[mystyrust]

with the rise of dpxdc i thought i'd share this little powerpoint i made about a year ago.

this was quinton reviews inspired, but i was too much a coward to make it a video.

i thought it was too funny not to share.

[jopzer]

i know it's lame to post powerpoints on tunglr these days but we did a powerpoint party a couple weeks ago and im still so proud of this one.

[veveisveryuncool]

i was freaking out over fnaf movie so hard that people in the theater were shushing me + two people recognized my markiplier cosplay

[neilyoungshearse]

So I’m making a Neil young PowerPoint

[marigoldbaker]

suffering thru the agonies (my btvs takes descending into insanity the more i mature)

[mars-ipan]

folks i may be skipping bio.

[merge-conflict]

(in the middle of my own train of thought) because valentine isn’t really capable of close intimacy without some sort of violent outburst- because true intimacy is a form of vulnerability and she has to prove herself by demonstrating she CAN defend herself if necessary and simply chooses to take things in stride. And so it’s obvious her relationship with goro is- if not healthy then healthiER than a lot of available alternatives, since she cannot for instance, initiate any sort of vulnerable contact with johnny without mood-altering drugs or at the very least a physical scuffle, because he also doesn’t possess any sort of emotional maturity and in some ways they’re rivals- which is interesting isn’t it, because he and kerry had a similar deal, except kerry’s response was to take more of it in stride- so is it that valentine is reacting to this subconscious knowledge of their previous failed relationship? Or perhaps her corpo lifestyle has simply taught her this lesson earlier and more harshly- (train of thought continues heedless of all outside influence)