#priestess gameplay

[pmakuma]

04 / 17 / 24

I DID IT I DID THE TRICK

[surelynotshirley]

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If you see me bring out Priestess in rank, RUN.

[yusuke-of-valla]

I've been playing Kunitsu-Gami: Path of the Goddess for the last week and now that it's release day I can finally say

Zelink girlies you're gonna have a TIME with this one if you decide to check it out

[guiltknight-gaming]

Baldur's Gate 3 Episode 8: Priestess Guts & Rescuing Volo

[facts-i-just-made-up]

Elden Ring DLC Bosses Revealed!

From Software has released a guide to all the bosses of the upcoming Elden Ring DLC, Shadow of the Erdtree! Here are the ten great monsters you'll fight in the Shadow Lands:

Messmer The Impaler

Messmer is the third triplet with Malenia and Miquella, banished to the shadow lands because for liking snakes and impaling people. Mostly for impaling people, but the snakes didn't help.

The Burning Colossus

A big heap of flaming bodies used as a weapon of war in the rival kingdom of Nausicuu, this massive beast has to be scaled and slain because that's what you do with colossi in games.

Albinauric Orphan Tear

The missing link between mimics and albinaurics, this monster throws his "husk" at the player like a boomerang. The first boss of the DLC, it guards the cave that leads to the Shadow Tree.

Godskin Brigade

The Gloam-Eyed Queen is guarded by an army of her progeny, the godskins. They bear her most fearsome weapon, the Incantation of Ganqskwa-Darengi, which makes them act unpredictably and never need to stop to let the player get in a single stab or arrow.

Godlion Dancer, Firstborn of the Gods

The murdered soul of Godwyn, son of Godfrey and brother to Godrick, Godrranq's lover. This guy has God written all over him. He also has 30 legs so he's good at dancing.

Birdmaster Tonguay, Slayer of Literally Everyone

Ever wonder who tied all those knives to all the bird feet? Ever wonder why there are so few people in the Lands Between? Meet Tonguay, murderer of all those people at the claws of his bird-knives.

Ribbitus, Priestess of the Frog Cult

Elden Ring's new gimmick boss can only be defeated by jumping from platform to tiny platform to poison the flies she likes to eat. She randomly kills the player without warning or opportunity to recover. She sings to you in French the whole time.

Metalgiir, Armored Gandamu

An occult robot constructed by Robot-Master Iji Jr., Metalgiir demands an entirely different kind of gameplay that doesn't fit or scale to anything else in the game, yet is not optional so you have to learn to beat him or you get nothing.

Ouchlord Vivaldi

Just... Don't fight this guy, he clearly has enough problems going on.

Daniel R. Clarksen

Little is known of Daniel Clarksen or why the Tarnished must fight him. He seems like a decent guy, but he probably like turns into a giant demon thing with boobs. These games have lots of those.

[cerastes]

OKAY, Reclamation Algorithm 2.

The first RA was a more arcade experience with meta progression: You had runs lasting only a few days, and you'd have to defend against a final boss horde in a much smaller overall map. Likewise, your resource acquisition was also much more explosive, such as getting a couple of Clash of Clans and other such resource-rich maps almost every run. You could only carry a few items other than what you had built on your base between runs, meaning that blowing up everything and saving a couple of things between runs was the way to go.

I think RA2 is easier overall than RA1 simply because it's a continuous, full-on mode that doesn't have an arcade, short-run based format. It goes on for as long as you play. Resource acquisition is slower because of its longer form nature, but it also does not at all pressure you with Linebreaker day 14 for example. Plus, the Energy System this time is much easier to manage, since you need Two Pops or Three Pops of Energy Drink to field an entire squad of 6 and under or 7 and above, respectively, whereas RA1 needed you to feed individual units from a Fountain of Energy Drink. That's not to say everything is easier; the Priestess and the Troubadour are much more challenging than anything RA1 threw at you -- Linebreaker, Ruinbringer, and Al-Rafiq --, and while the new horde bosses are fun, they are on about the same difficulty as those three, who are more or less tests of RA mechanics and if you are using them or not more than anything.

Make no mistake, this is ENDGAME endgame, especially in regards to Priestess and Troubadour, since you have to beat them in one Day -- two attempts at the map in which your progress is saved between attempts, BUT in which you can only use each unit once, so if you want to use 12 units per attempt, that'd be 24 units you think are up to par -- and they bring mean gimmicks that can be curbed somewhat by the season in which you fight them, but not entirely, and are still quite formidable even with the counter season. They were some of my favorite parts of the mode, personally, because not only is it a big, harsh challenge, it also reinforces the World Of Adventure nature of Terra: Even though they are unaligned with any of the big factions, you still have REALLY strong individuals roaming the land.

I think the main difficulty for a lot of people will come from choice overload: Arknights is already a game with a lot of player expression and a focus on gameplay, both aspects not at all the norm with gacha games and thus not what a lot of gacha gamers are used to, and while main content is kept very accessible to all skill levels, they do provide truly endgame challenges that can be quite demanding in terms of skill, for players that do dabble in the depth of player expression and team building that Arknights offers, such as High Multiplier (Waves/Natures) Integrated Strategies and 26+ Risk Contingency Contract.

This preamble is to say, Reclamation Algorithm has even more player expression and thus potential options for you to use. You have so, so many more tools other than just your Operators that a lot of people just don’t know what to do with them, hence why I think so many people find it so much harder than it truly is. Food for a myriad of different stat boosts and perks, structures to mold maps and enemy routing at your will, the ability to create your own ranged tiles or throw 5-block fridges at your enemies, purposefully overpowered tools like stun mines and supply stations at your beck and call, you can do so much in RA, and for some people, maybe it’s too much. Like an open world game does for some people, the sheer vastness of your options in RA2 might just blind and overwhelm some, especially since the average gacha player is very casual (and that’s not in the slightest an insult), and the average AK player watches clear guides without really understanding why the strat in the guide worked. Thus, in a mode in which player expression is king, the player that barely interacts with the baseline mechanics of the game, let alone those exclusive to RA, is not even part of the kingdom. For me personally, RA1 clicked the moment I realized just how nightmarishly strong the player is if they use food and structures, and after that, it was a non-stop streak of wins (unbroken in RA2 since RA1, too).

My advice to anyone trying to seriously get into RA2 is to just experiment as much as you can with anything that even remotely calls to you: Is there a unit you like a lot, like say, Bibeak? Well what if you give her insane attack, bulk and infinite SP to spam her skills? Food that buffs ATK, 2 shield generators and 2 supply stations on Bibeak makes this a reality. You wish Yato Kirin had no DP cost whatsoever? There’s food that makes her DP cost 0 no matter how many times you deploy her. You wonder what it’d be like for Eunectes to have 3 Block? Food does that. You think a particular map would be much more manageable if you could just have a Corrupting Heart-buffed 5-Block Mudrock in a particular chokepoint with no ranged tiles? You make your own ranged tile and then give Food to Mudrock to get her to 5 Block, or maybe 3 Block is enough, and you’d rather she has 75% extra Def and 35 more Res instead to make her truly unkillable, well, food does that too.

You just need to dabble into the possibilities a bit before it becomes crystal clear just how insane you can get.

[roguelioness]

I'm back with my tin foil hat on, spoilers beneath the cut-

So the two creatures rising up at the end of the gameplay trailer - I suspect it's Ghila'nain and Elgar'nan, and here's why I think so (this is just speculation!)

(I tried to get the best closeups I could!)

You can see the two beings rising up here:

The figure on the left is, i suspect, Ghila'nain

From The Horror of Hormak it's implied Ghila'nain had an interest in creatures with many limbs. the figure has several appendages in addition to the normal pair of arms.

It's interesting that the face is entirely hidden - or, at the very least, that mask is covering the eyes, because Ghila'nain's story involves losing them-

From the codex entry for Ghila'nain:

Ghilan'nain followed the hunter, and when they were away from all of her sisters, the hunter turned on Ghilan'nain. He blinded her first, and then bound her as one would bind a kill fresh from the hunt.

If she doesn't have eyes, it makes sense that she would cover them up. There's also her mosaic from the Temple of Mythal that could be taken as extra appendages:

(granted the mosaic in its entirety had those as part of halla horns, but... why are they covered in the same material as the face?) I think - going off of HoH - she was at one point Andruil's priestess, and at some point of time (perhaps when Andruil went hunting into the void) discovered the weird green lyrium which she then used to conduct her terrifying experiments. And because of that ability, she was granted ascension. Whether or not she transformed herself into that creature pre- or post-ascension is something I hope we'll learn (was it done deliberately? or was it a side effect? so many questions!)

Now my reasoning for this being Elgar'nan is a bit shakier; the first thing that made me go hmmm was a line from the Dragon Age Day trailer:

"All the world will soon share the peace and comfort of my reign."

That to me reads like Head-of-the-Pantheon kind of speech (I told you my reasoning was shaky lol)

But the other thing that has my raising my eyebrows is, well, Flemythal. The Chasind know Flemeth as Mother of Vengeance, and Elgar'nan is considered to be the god of vengeance (and Mythal's husband). Flemeth's speech about Mythal - "she was betrayed, as I was betrayed, as the world was betrayed" I thought referred to the veil's creation, but I'm beginning to wonder if it was a reference to Elgarn'an, seeing as he (along with Mythal) were supposed to have remade the world (from the codex entry for Mythal). If Elgar'nan took part in her murder, it could be seen as him (metaphorically) betraying the world. The other thing that caught my eye was his mosaic from Temple of Mythal:

The figure in the mosaic has two curves going outward from the shoulder region, which matches the armor the figure in the trailer is wearing. Granted this could mean nothing, seeing as how Flemeth's attire (specifically her hair) more resembles the mosaic for Mythal's dragon form than Mythal herself, but considering none of the other mosaics had anything similar to this makes me think Elgar'nan is the likeliest candidate.

Anyway, thank you for coming to my ted talk :D

[alicelufenia]

Thinking about the recent change to recruiting Minthara and how a lot of people may be disappointed to find her not at Moonrise for various reasons

I haven't done it myself, but several guide videos detail that it's still, kinda an exacting thing that doesn't quite fit normal gameplay flow.

UPDATE: I have since tested it out, and tl;dr, it works as described! See this post if you wanna skip to a successful recruitment, or read on to see how it works.

UPDATE 2: One last catch, if you do opt to knock out Minthara this way, DO NOT Long Rest afterwards unless the Kill the Goblin Leader quest has been flagged as complete. You can deal with Priestess Gut anyway you like, so long as the whole camp doesn't get alerted. Dror Ragzlin should be saved for LAST since his fight has the best chance of alerting the whole camp and will aggro a ton of goblins regardless. Make sure you can handle both Minthara and the Ragzlin horde without long resting in between.

1) Perhaps most crucially, you need to knock her out when she is Temporarily Hostile, a condition the game doesn't explain well at any point. Basically any time combat is initiated through dialogue enemies will not have this condition, will be considered "fully hostile", and knocking them out still flags them as dead. The way you get this condition is by committing "crimes" in line of sight of an NPC. If they are temporarily hostile, knocking them out and taking a Long Rest will reset their aggro to normal.

2) the most common ways people would LIKE to knock her out; after talking to her at the goblin camp, or even better, at the grove battle, both initiate combat through dialogue, making her fully hostile instead of Temporarily Hostile.

3) the Kill the Goblin Leaders quest still says she's dead even if you knock her out with the Temporarily Hostile condition, which feels like a bug. I haven't seen Halsin's new dialogue for resolving the conflict without killing the leaders, so maybe that would work as a soft confirmation that you successfully knocked her out. Regardless, if you try to complete the Kill the Goblin Leaders quest and draw aggro from the whole camp before knocking her out, Minthara will be fully hostile too.

4) so the way to knock her out is to attack the goblin near her, triggering a "you've committed a crime" response that puts her into Temporarily Hostile condition, and then knock her out. Which again, involves NOT TALKING TO HER when her dialogue would initiate Raid the Grove (since refusing triggers a fight), which if you already freed Liam, is THE FIRST TIME you talk to her

Also for Paladin players, remember killing NPCs who aren't aggro, even if they're "bad guys", will break your oath, so you need to non-lethal the goblin next to her too (any reinforcements that initiate combat on sight should be fair game tho) Dunno how that works with Vengeance, maybe they get a pass but I wouldn't risk it.

Please let me know if I am flat out wrong about any of this, I just wanted to get this topic out there because I know a lot of people (myself included) are looking forward to good playthrough minty recruitment, and I don't want people to fuck it up accidentally.

[murfeelee]

BG3 INSP: Spare the Illithid, Spoil the Flood Tide - Pt1

Allandra Grey, the Flood Tide (high priestess) of the sea goddess Umberlee, had made a grave mistake once as a youth. She had never seen a Mind Flayer in the flesh before, so when one just so happened to be marooned in her seas, she thought nothing of bringing the creature safely to shore. She had quite the fondness for tentacles, after all. Umberlee, however, was furious, ordering her daughter to quickly dispatch the Mind Flayer she was sheltering, lest the Illithid scourge spread through their domain!

MY THOUGHTS & CC CREDITS

MY THOUGHTS

I forgot to post this way back in February with the rest of my BG3 gameplay. Oops? (I totally made all this up, LOL, including what Umberlee looks like.)

CC CREDITS

This was just me messing around with the awesome Mermaid mods at MTS by @puddingface1902 (here), and Xantak22 (here).

- Allandra's Umberlee set by me

- Mind Flayer head by me

- Umberlee's dreads by Vittler, top by @rstarsims3; skin & octopus tail by @niobecremisi

- Mermaidia world by @crowkeeperthesimmer

[tavtime]

Still turning over in my head what it means that, out of all the true souls you encounter throughout the game, you are uniquely able to save Minthara and Minsc. Not really in a gameplay sense (e.g. Larian went to the trouble of making these characters and they wanted people to get to experience that) but in a more meta-story sense. This is less interesting to me in the context of Minsc, who has preexisting ties to the party via Jaheira, than in Minthara's case.

The thing about true souls is that they have no idea what's happened to them, right? They believe themselves to have been blessed by a goddess, which is not an out-of-line experience to have in Faerun. In the case of the goblin camp leaders *specifically* you can even tell priestess Gut that the voice of her goddess is a mind flayer tadpole like you have, which she explicitly rejects - angrily, too. Whether or not you see the cultists' motivations as innocent to any degree, they are at least *genuine*: they hear a voice they perceive as rooted in divinity. They had no say in this happening to them, and are kept deliberately ignorant of the agenda that they're being used to further.

And the party just cuts them down. You are, in fact, framed as being in the right to do this. Sure, the cultists are murdering or converting everyone they can get their hands on, but... what are you, the PC, doing? Because it is not trying to save these people who have been indoctrinated. You can show a guard at Moonrise the truth of what has happened to him, which breaks his mind immediately. But you can't save him. The narrative you're confined in doesn't encourage you to try; it rewards you for his death.

I think Minthara's role in the party, examined in this light, is really interesting. Saving her in a good playthrough becomes less a shoehorned-in act of fan service and something closer to a meta-commentary on the morality of your journey. She's not a good person, inarguably, but does that matter? Is what has been done to her without her consent or her knowledge a good enough reason to condemn her? Why choose to save this one, player? Did you ever stop to consider that they might all have been worth more of an effort than you made? Answer while looking her in the eye, please.

[pmakuma]

12 / 03 / 23

this team wasn't necessarily coordinated per se, moreso just determined to be a pain in the ass

[surelynotshirley]

undefined

NGL I was so freaking high and yet I somehow managed to pull off cleaner rescues than when I’m sober

[rawliverandgoronspice]

I wish mineru got to me an actual character because every single theme we get that has to do with her (thunder islands, spirit temple, construct factory) are so gorgeous and made me fall in love with her, the soundtrack does so much heavy lifting in this game

You're so correct about the soundtrack, it tells such a compelling tale and it really builds off itself constantly, it's genuinely one of my favorite parts of the game!!

Honestly Mineru had tons of potential. I really liked the entire quest to find her and her body, it was the part of the game that kind of sold me the most the mystery and wonder of having such a big world spanning the sky all the way to the Depths. The atmospheric mood of the Thunderhead Isles was wonderful, loved following the light all the way to the Depths (I had already stumbled upon the actual Construct Factory in them before). It was the part of the game that "felt the most zonai" to me, this sort of puzzle-like intricacy of how their influence permeate the world that their name alone was meant to invoke. I regret the lack of worldbuilding here, even a very light one (what was were the Thunderhead Isles? What significance did they have in zonai culture? What about the structures on the ground in the jungle? I would have *loved* more... anything in the Construct Factories), but it was still a treat as a gameplay experience.

(I mean I hated having to pilot the Construct Body itself, but that's more a me problem than a game problem, thankfully the boxing match was a ton of funs regardless)

The character herself though.... Like I feel like there's a lot of potential inherent to her status as one of the last zonais AND her status as the king's sister (not to mention her engineering proclivities). She feels like she should have a very unique perspective on the entire situation, insight about what caused the fall of the zonais (or their departure/refusal to engage with Hyrule), have both tenderness but also criticism towards her brother his wife might not have (as his lover and as an inherently lesser being bound to his good will, she's a priestess so she probably prays to the gods and zonais are said to descend from gods can we talk about that also), share a unique relationship with Zelda through their common love for knowledge (I think Zelda having a strong relationship with Mineru sounds more meaningful than her having one with Sonia as of now tbh, and it would have helped their scenes to be more interesting than an excuse to infodump, I almost said that it's a ship before remembering they're technically related SOMEHOW?? so mayyybe not).

But in practice, she has no desires of her own. She's but an extension of her brother's will, except softer, muted, heartbroken not for her loss (and the fact that her entire race is about to die out once she does), but for Hyrule's perdition. I am still not over the fact that when she swears her oath of fielty to Link, she *touches her brother's hand*, aka the only meaningful relationship in her life that we got to see, zonai skin touching zonai skin for... probably the last time ever? And the camera couldn't care less. No lingering, no body tension, not even one of the little sounds that BotW/TotK characters love to make in cutscenes everytime anything happens, not even any callback to the explicit motif of people touching each other's hand as a sign of support and unity (so you know what symbolism/allegory means game!!! you know this!!!!), the game doesn't seem to be aware that she should be a person with feelings that extend beyond her performative guilt about a situation that has basically nothing to do with her/she couldn't have done anything about/she did everything she could about, actually! She's just here to be a vessel for the restoration project of her brother's kingdom (Rauru being the only one allowed any emotion of genuine grief and upset, and it only lasts like half a second --which sucks!! I wish that, if Sonia was to be fridged anyway, it at least motivated him to become vengeful and furious and make a mistake that costed him his victory, which would have made him sliiightly more compelling instead of reverting back to a fancy cardbox of unquestionned perfection).

Also she's technically the last one you're supposed to get (but you can get her first??? this is such a weird choice sometimes linearity is good nintendo!!!), and after such a long quest, there should have been a narrative reward to finding her that goes harder than "and then Rauru decided to hype you up like crazy to Ganondorf, also Zelda is probably a dragon but you probably already know that" in my opinion. Some modicum of depth; a different emotional texture to the conflict. After that much build up, the payoff didn't land for me.

Yeah. Mineru. She really could have been the aqua-glue holding that ultrahand-ass of a plot together, but Alas.....

[pretty-batty]

Would you like to come back?

Eddie x Original Female Character Pt 2 of Eldath's Priestess 2406 words

No warnings. Tags: Dungeons and Dragons, table top gameplay, flashback usage marked by =, slight angst, Jewish oc, family dynamics. Now on ao3 No beta this time. We ride like the Rohirrim in the Battle of the Pelennor.

Summary: Judy gets reacquainted with her favorite troupe of misfits, and the newest members.

Notes: Not canon compliant, alternate history of Hellfire, semi-accurate portrayal of Dungeons and Dragons. hint of Eddie the Simp.

Judy was buzzing with excitement, tossing her dice bag into her purse. She had gotten the call from Fred Emerson, the Dungeon Master of Hawkins legend, immediately asking her if she would “join in the newest crusade against the Shadow Lord”. She had never accepted an offer to quickly in her life.

The handmade drawstring bag kept her pencil case company as she went to her suitcase and pulled out her binder, cracking it open. From the corner pocket, she saw her old character sheet.

Feyanim Hellarad       Half-Elf Cleric            Lvl- 14- High Priestess          Lawful Good

From banished princess to priestess of Eldath, yearning for adventure far from the cloister and the crown.

Her memory played vignettes of her times as Nim, starting with her older brother, introducing her to the game on her twelfth birthday.

“A princess? Are you sure?” he had asked.

Little Judy nodded at her desk, “yeah! But she has a heart of gold. Forced into the cloister by her mother, the queen, and her jealous stepfather, the king.”

“Is she illegitimate?”

“I think so. That would add…” She paused, searching for the word.

“Angst.”

“Yeah…angst.”

Judy’s eyes shot to her bedside clock. 3:45. Fifteen minutes to get to Scott’s place, pick him up, and drive to Fred Emmerson’s place for the game. After a year without playing, in Pittsburgh where her brother’s body lay buried, she was itching for the game to continue. Her old group, her old comrades. She finally exited her front door.

                                                            =

Her brother, the dungeon master, introduced her to the group the first Friday of freshman year, Eddie in tow. His hair was longer than when she had last seen him. She had hoped he would grow it out.

The newest members of Hellfire club, the trailer park metalhead and the nepo-baby.

Her stomach was in knots. Where were the other girls?

Before she could open her mouth, Eddie took a step forward, his voice booming throughout the stage. “I am Edward the Stalwart, half-orc fighter, prepared to cast off the bonds of the past through my unquenchable thirst of adventure.”

“And how do we know you, young Edward, have the grit to join the band of fearless warriors who sit before you?” Joey asked, theatrically gesturing to the other men at the table.

To be honest, she had tuned out Eddie’s answer, too paranoid about her own.

Their gazes turned to her now. “I…am Feyanim Hellarad, half-elf cleric.” She cleared her throat, feeling a push of energy, “from banished princess to priestess of Eldath, I yearn for adventure beyond the cloister and the crown.”

The table was quiet. She looked at Eddie, whose sweet brown eyes gave her the encouragement she needed.

“And what makes you, dear princess, fit for adventure as a priestess of the most peaceful of Gods?” Her brother asked, no longer the Joey she was used to, but the DM, omniscient voice of the world she wished to join.

The question stumped her. It was a good question. Why would she venture from Eldath’s still waters to join this rowdy band of fools?

She heard two of the older boys make a comment, leading to a chuckle, which turned into a laugh. A ginger boy, bespectacled and haughty, called over to Joey. “Listen, man. We get that she’s your sister and all, but is she really ready for advanced Dungeons and Dragons?”

Judy’s lips pursed in irritation. Staring down the table, she took a step further, placing her foot on what she planned to be her chair, puffing her chest out. “I am already a priestess, skilled in the healing arts. And by all that is holy, I will ensure your survival. Something tells me you lack a healer in this party. If I may be frank, this party lacks any sense at all.”

“Then welcome, Princess Hellarad, to Hellfire.” Joey placed a hand on her shoulder, whispering with pride, “good job.”

She sat down, beside the boy who had talked down to her, and across from the boy she had known for years. Judy and Eddie’s eyes met, excited to be joining the first campaign of the year. They reached across and grasped each other’s hands, uncertain of why. Was it a shake of mutual friendship? Or did she just want to touch him, like she always had, and he finally wanted the same?

Before the winter break, Joey had planned first boss fight, a paladin oathbreaker and his undead horde was prepared to slaughter the party. He took his job as DM very seriously, carefully considering all player’s strengths and weaknesses, deciding what path he wanted them to go down. He was more narrative focused, though his battles were just as intense.

“What is your action, princess?”

“There is still time we can make it.” Shouted Marty.

Eddie sucked in a breath, “I’m already down. We can’t last much longer.”

“Your action princess.” Joey insisted.

Judy looked at Eddie, who gave her a nod. He was on board. The others were either prone, dying, or occupied by the undead horde. She looked at the rogue, Andreas the Swift, who had yet to reveal himself. He gave her a nod.

“Does he see me?”

“In his fury he has paid no mind to you.”

“Then I get advantage.” Judy gritted her teeth, “I cast command,” rattling her first d20 and sending it to the table, 14, with her modifier it still wouldn’t hit. The next d20 followed with her call, 19, with her wisdom modifier that would be a twenty-three.

Her brother cracked a smile, an evil smile. She felt her heart sink before her brother froze, as if struck by lightning. “What is your command?” He bellowed.

From the far end of the table, her finger extended, and she cried out, “grovel!”

“Yes…” Her brother slammed his hands on the table along with his face, to make it seem as though he threw himself down, “my la..dy…”

Knowing it was his turn, the halfling assassin played his held action and backstabbed the prone paladin oathbreaker, with advantage, and all his proficiencies, doing heavy damage. Judy’s command turned the tide. That and her brother’s two very unfortunate rolls.

                                                            =

Summer rains were Judy’s least favorite. The droplets themselves, warmed by the atmosphere, felt like stones against her skin. Fat rain, heavy rain. Also, the humidity made her hair both expand an extra half an inch in width and cling to any piece of skin it touched. A hot, wet, sweaty mess.

She slid quickly into her 1970 Volkswagen beetle, closing the door behind her. There was her cleric figurine, mounted with a rolled slip of duct tape, and sitting beside her was an armor-clad half-orc, her lover’s paladin. Gifted to her before she left for Pittsburgh by Eddie Munson, the presiding Dungeon Master of the Hawkins High School Hellfire Club.

“I won’t need him anymore. Besides, I don’t think I could bring myself to separate the princess from her paladin.” He took her hand and enfolded his figurine in her palm, “as sadistic of a DM I might be, I would never.”

Judy’s lips fought back a frown, “I’m sorry. I just can’t stay here and wait…”

“I know,” he released her hand to caress her face, bringing her lips to his in a gentle kiss. “You’re still my girl, however far you go.” Another kiss, this time on the bridge of her nose. A journey up to her face that he had taken many times before, a path he adored. “And when I graduate this year,” his lips rested on her forehead, his nose nestling in her hair, “I will get in my van and come to you.”

“Class of eighty-six.” She smiled.

She started her trusty steed, twisting the key in the ignition and listening to the turnover. Knocking it into reverse, flicking on the windshield wipers, she looked over her shoulder to pull out smoothly from the driveway.

“Eighty-six, baby.” Eddie’s voice echoed once again though Judy’s ears, as the phantom kiss still warmed her skin. She never should have left, never should have watched him shrink away as she drove further from her home. Her eyes graced back as if he was still standing there. Nothing.

The citizens and military personnel had entered a regular routine, the belching crags that divided the town into fourths became as normal as creeks and cliffs. Judy’s practice of Pittsburgh navigation took a backseat to the slow and cautious pace of post-earthquake Hawkins. None of her destinations were severed by a crack. First, five minutes away, was Scott Clark, another teacher. He had started the year after Judy entered high school, taking over for Emma Magil for 8th grade science.

Their journey went off without any conflict. Judy had asked him about his fiancée. Scott had asked her how her mother was doing. Neither really dug into the unspoken sorrow in the air. She parked her beetle in the street, as the driveway was already full of cars. The two got out and joined in the festivities within.

The kitchen and the dining room were separated by a countertop, upon which was a lineup of various snacks. A veggie tray, some cheese and crackers, tiny sausages on toothpicks, mini ham and cheese sandwiches.

God bless you, Sheryl. Judy thought.

Fred had married Sheryl Kaufmann when Gareth was in middle school. Joey would drag Judy to these grownup games at the Emerson house. She’d sit with Gareth as he kicked rocks in the driveway. Sheryl would come out with snacks, and he’d grumble a forced ‘thank you’.

That woman tried so hard. She didn’t make him call her mom. No pushing boundaries, forcing herself to be liked by her stepson. But she still tried. And even when Gareth warmed up to her, called her ‘Cher-bear’ when she called him ‘Gare-bear’, told her he loved her too, she still felt the need to prove herself. She wanted him to have a good home, a place to feel safe and happy.

In the end, they all loved Sheryl.

“Celery’s gross.” Gareth said, staring blankly at the veggie.

“You don’t have to eat it.” Said Sheryl as she floated through the kitchen.

“Not to everyone,” Dustin reached his hand past the upper classman’s gaze, fishing out three sticks of green and placing them on his plate.

“I don’t know, Henderson.” Judy rattled her d20s in her hand, releasing them on the table. “Celery is just bitter and stringy.” She sighed at her results, “Guess purple and red are going to dice jail.” The dice clattered in her brother’s old ashtray. “Bummer, these were his.”

“Whose?” Will asked, sliding next to her at the table.

“My late brother, he was the DM of Hellfire before Eddie.” She answered, rolling the final two dice, “nine-teen and twelve, guess I’m using these.”

Will sat awkwardly, taking a moment to salvage the situation. “I didn’t realize Hellfire was so old.”

“Oh yeah, it started as an offshoot of the chess club.” Judy popped a tiny sausage into her mouth, half her mouth chewing as the other half continued, “My brother was a sophomore. Fred was the teacher who signed off on it. Seventy-eight, I think. I came in two years later and somehow these guys had already set up their boys’ club.”

Andrew dropped his bag on the table, sitting on the opposite side of Judy. “And how is our beloved nepo-baby? Still squeezing into places she might not be wanted?” Setting his cane down between them, he slumped into the hardwood chair.

“God, you are such a dick. I saved your lives how many times in my four years as your resident cleric?”

“None of that matters now, your eminence.” A voice bellowed.

Dressed in his Renaissance best, Fred Emrerson slowly made his way down the stairs to the dining room, the wood creaking below his weight. His graying auburn hair tucked under his feathered flat cap. “Such a high ranking Eldathyn priestess should do well not to dwell on lives owed.”

“Wait…Eldath?” Dustin slid beside Will, “what’s your name again?”

“Uh..Nim Hellara-”

“No, your actual name.”

“It’s Judy.”

“No. Actually, Hebrew name.” He insisted.

“Who says I have a Hebrew name?”

“You’re a Jew, of course you have one.” The table let out a chorus of sniffs in amusement. Dustin was always frank, seeing no point in sugarcoating and beating around any proverbial bushes.

Judy nodded; lips pressed in a thin line. “Yudit-Miriam after my great-grandmother.”

The young teenager smiled, as if the pieces of an ongoing puzzle fit into place. “Huh.”

Once Fred reached his chair at the end of the dining room table, the game began.

The tavern was busier than usual, the cloud giants had occupied a nearby summer palace. And with unusual activity and monsters to be slain, comes many an adventurer hoping to increase their renown, or their coffers.

Judy worried Nim would struggle to fit in, but with Andreas the Swift by her side, she was quickly welcomed into the party.

“Nimmy,” he asked, “what’s that thing you used to do? That poem?”

“The limericks?” She clarified. They nodded and Judy took a sip of her lemon-lime pop. She began.

“There was once a woman from Wheeling, who had a particular feeling. She laid on her back, tickled her crack, and pissed all over the ceiling.”

It got a laugh. But her eyes fell once more to Dustin as his gaze burned into the side of her head.

The younger players were at a lower level compared to the others, and Fred had planned accordingly. But Andrew, Scott, and Judy pulled most of the weight, Gareth and Jeff were auxiliary. But Fred was a kinder DM compared to Eddie. He never liked to punish his players, and only wished for a good story and plenty of laughs. The younger players: Dustin, Will, Mike, Lucas, and Erica, were uneasy and borderline paranoid. No doubt traumatized by Eddie or the tales of him.

“Perception check on the door.” Erica rattled the dice, “not gonna let you take me out because of some trap.”

Fred was ready to tell her it was ‘just a door’, but he let her roll anyway. And even with her nat16 and the modifier, she still refused to believe it wasn’t rigged with a trap.

Judy’s character stepped forward, holding her shield up in front of Erica. “Okay, if something happens, you won’t get hit.” The lock was picked, door opened to the next room. No bomb, no spikes, no danger, just a door.

“A valid fear, my lady.” Scott’s druid reassured Erica, “the Gods can be cruel.”

Judy leaned in and whispered to her, “Fred doesn’t run games like Eddie. The worst thing he tried to do was the Tomb of Horrors. A tenth of the way through, he scrapped it. The only time I heard him use the ‘just a dream’ cliché.”

 “I read that module after that session, and it is so asinine. And the captured nymph thing was so creepy.” Andrew Grumbled.

They continued through the maze of corridors, an entire world inside the walls of the small palace, occupied by a very uncomfortable cloud giant.

Through a spell of marching teapots and a well-placed howl from a dark corner, the group managed to rid the small castle of the cloud giant squatter. The fact of the matter is, not all D&D sessions are climactic battles or salacious dramas. Sometimes, it’s just pretending to be ghosts to scare away a cloud giant because he’s too high level and no one wants to die.

Once the session was over, Fred offered to give Scott a ride if he agreed to stay for a few more beers. Judy had her own belongings packed. While she had enjoyed herself for the first time in recent memory, the ache in her chest refused to abate. It wasn’t the same without her paladin.

The air draped over the trees, the smoke from the cracks caught beneath the thick layer of moisture. It stuck to her skin, her hands becoming clammy with each swipe across her shorts. She just wanted to get home.

Dustin stopped her before she got to her car.

“You’re Yudit Mountain Song.”

“Yudit Mountain Song?”

“Yeah,” Dustin opened Eddie’s binder of character sheets, messily flipping through the pages. Judy watched the many NPCs fly by, familiar faces and strangers alike, until she finally saw it. Her face. “She’s a reoccurring character, a half-elf bard who gave us some excellent quests and much needed rescues. Even gave my character her harp, lets me have an extra bardic inspiration slot after a long rest.” He excitedly handed the binder off to Judy.

She gazed at her own face, her own body. He had given her some additions, fantasy length hair and a lyre. Her lips parted in song. Eddie had made her a singer.

“I knew you looked familiar.” Dustin continued. “At first, I thought it was a coincidence, but then you said that dirty limerick and I remembered Eddie saying that exact joke when introducing her before the Vecna storyline.”

Judy flipped through the character sheets until reaching the back. Eddie had made one for Kas, altering little traits to mirror himself.

“Pretty sure Yudit and Kas used to connect, before his sword made him all…evil.”

“Maybe I was the blade and not the bard, slowly pulling him to the darkness, seducing him with power.” She smiled, “or maybeeee I was both.” Judy closed the binder, handing it back to Dustin. “I’m sure we’ll never know.”

Thank you for reading! This is a passion project of mine, and it means a lot that you are taking time out of your life to read this. Next chapter very soon...like tomorrow maybe. tag list: @voyeurmunson

[englishmagic]

After @sillyshrimpfella suggested Disco Elysium tarot designs I haven’t been able to stop pondering it.

(Am I desperate to distract myself from terrible things in the world about which I can do nothing except “raise awareness” and donate money I don’t really have? …maybe)

It’s probably something that’s been done before, but here are my thoughts on the major arcana so far:

The Fool - Harry Du Bois. I was initially thinking the Magician for Harry, because of his effortless genius and creative mindset, but then I remembered the Fool, and… yeah. Naïveté, a fresh approach to the world, being ridiculous for better or worse - it’s all him, baby!

The Magician - Mega Rich Light Bending Guy. This one I am less certain of - I haven’t encountered him myself and I refuse to watch videos of it until I can make the check myself. I put him here because he does seem rather magical, but is he creative, talented, and an effortless genius? Unpredictable and unreliable? I really don’t know. Another person I was thinking of was Neha, she’s creative and industrious, but didn’t quite feel singular enough for the card, so I place her more as the Queen of Coins/Pentacles at the moment.

The High Priestess - Plaisance. She is a figure who (kind of) worships a higher power, and though she’s not really an oracle in the way that the card often represents, she’s a symbol of belief in the supra-natural in the forms of curses, entities, et cetera. Albeit in quite cheesy, culturally dicey ways.

The Empress - Joyce Messier. She presents feminine traditions and mannerisms, but also has a lot of institutional and traditional power as a representative of the capitalist world order.

The Emperor - Everart Claire. He’s a masculine-ish figure who uses his institutional power in the union to exert his influence on the world. Not physically imposing, but I don’t think that’s a requirement - he has a racist, a street gang, and an uncomfortable chair at his disposal where others would have fists to fight with.

The Hierophant - Dolores Dei. Yes, she’s the hierophant and not the priestess - Dolores is a figure of worship, not a worshipper, she represents organised faith rather than personal faith. You don’t have to stick 100% within the traditional genders for these cards.

The Lovers - Next World Mural. Self explanatory - I think that image would look good on a card too!

The Chariot - the Coupris Kineema. I like this because not only does it make sense sense to put a vehicle from the game on the chariot card, the sound of the Kineema is the journey from intro to gameplay, and this card is all about journeys!

Strength - Measurehead. Because… He’s strong. There’s not much more to this one; I’m happy to accept other ideas, especially since the card is usually a woman. Also, who or what would be the lion? Just… a picture of Jean-Luc Race Warrior wrestling a lion? …….actually what if this card depicted Samaran bear wrestling, that’s a fun alternative

The Hermit - Tiago the Crab Man. He is isolated by choice and strongly associated with philosophy. I was thinking the Deserter for this one originally, buttttt then I had a different idea for him.

Wheel of Fortune - the pleasure wheel. Visually fun. Also symbolically appropriate - the never-built attraction represents the investment gamble that didn’t pay off.

Justice - The Deserter. The card usually has a judge on it, dispensing retribution. The Deserter sees himself this way; he’s also a singular male figure with a “gavel” in the form of his rifle. Visually appropriate.

The Hanged Man - Lely Kortaneer. Because he is a hanged man. I wonder if he can be tied to the deeper meaning of the card through the “conversations” Harry has with him in his head, or simply through the fact that being dead he naturally has no agency?

Death - Working Class Corpse. This one is just sad. In some ways this death is more “death-y” than any other in the game, underlining how things, and people, can end abruptly and without warning. And his discovery is the end of an investigation, too.

Temperance - Washerwoman. Mainly a visual connection - she’s a woman with a container of water. The card could be her pouring washing water from one cup to another, and I think it would be a nice image.

The Devil - Cuno De Ruyter. He has given into vices already despite his young age, and he influences you to do the same. This is honestly one of the few places I consider a Fury could be a good choice for a card - Electrochemistry is basically the Devil personified.

The Tower - FELD R&D. A crumbling building where everything can quite easily go to shit - the tower is about things falling apart and potentially being rebuilt. The FALN employees fell apart - aka were executed - and Ruby is building something new in the ruins.

The Star - Klaasje Amandou. Kind of ironic to have her, a manipulator who’s always in control, on a card that represents leaving things to fate- but the visual of her hiding documents in the buoy really fits the traditional design of the card and could be adapted well, and while she’s not very up in the air herself, the skills all get up in the air while talking to her because of how you’re compromised by her beauty and charm. It’s not so much about where she finds herself, but where you find yourself in relation to her - unable to trust your own knowledge and defaulting to chance more often than you’d want.

The Moon - Insulindian Phasmid. It’s a mystery! Maybe it could be the crustacean in the design? Or it could be haloed by the moon the way Kim is haloed by the sun. I love the specification for the moon design in tarot so it does have to have two dogs and a crustacean for me to be happy.

The Sun - Kim Kitsuragi. Haloed by the sun. A new dawn. A new lease on life. This is what he represents to Harry.

Judgement - the Tribunal/Krenel. A tribunal is a court event, a judgement of sorts, and the event is a moment of dire consequence in the game. The mercenaries lining up like the angels on judgement day would also make a cool visual.

The World - Elysium. Self explanatory, I think? The image would be the world broken apart, with the isolas emerging from the pale.

For the minor arcana I’ve not got a lot of opinions - Lillienne the Netpicker as Queen of Swords for no deeper reason than the fact that she has a sword, Annette as Page of Coins/Pentacles because she’s a bright and precocious child… The cups would have a lung design on them, maybe? I really hope someone else has Thoughts about this because I would like to visualise the entire thing in my mind until I inevitably try to draw it and ruin my enthusiasm when I remember that my art skills do not match my ambition in this area 😂

[snarp]

Last night's overly-complicated dream: a Dungeon Meshi setting-based game, with a plot structured like Dragon Age: Origins.

Most of the player origin storylines were very short and basic, and re-used a lot of dialog and NPCs - the game had even shipped with the dwarf one glitched and unfinishable, to my outrage.

There was one exception, obviously originally intended to be the only player character: a half-foot raised within a small enclave of a plot-relevant elven religious/military order (based on the Canaries and the Grey Wardens), which was itself located in a soon-to-be-razed half-foot ghetto within an orcish dungeon kingdom (visually based on the darkspawn Deep Roads sections from "A Paragon of her Kind," and also on a disintegrating mall in Elizabethtown, KY).

This player character's adoptive father is an early plot-relevant boss, an orc general who is a bull chimera - basically, a minotaur - who was in a brief political (?) marriage with the half-foot "mayor," who was implicitly the prior dungeon lord. After this woman's death, he was pressured to give the toddler player character to the elf cultists to ensure that she had no potential "heir".

...But he maintained contact with the player, calls them his "daughter" (regardless of player-selected gender, according to Tumblr complaints), and reminisces sadly about her mother. His continued visits to the elf cult may even be how its senior members infiltrated the orcs' political structure and convinced them to get involved with The Blood Lord (final boss, basically The Demon/The Archdemon) who convinced their leader to build a golem army and conquer the outside world.

The elf cult's purpose in most places is stated to be "killing vampires"... but naturally its members are very prone to going mad with bloodlust, and there are always a few who get brainwashed by The Blood Lord and decide that they really ought to be serving the vampires/become vampires themselves/etc. 

The player character's sect is pretty much cooked by the time she finishes the tutorial section. There are a bunch of plot-relevant conversations she can have with her dad and other orc-aligned characters trying to convince them that their "allies" in the blood cult are "turning this shit into a Dragon Age game". (The comedic dialog choices invariably have bad consequences, which tells me that Ryoko Kui probably did not make the gameplay design choices.) 

Ultimately, she always has to flee and choose which potential ally to try to mobilize first against the orc invasion: a human city-state, a gnomish university, or the elf-queen. In each case, she has the option of going to the local cultists and warning them first. 

This is always clearly-telegraphed as a bad move, but it's also clearly the devs' "canonical" choice to go immediately to the elf capital and try to warn what the player character believes to be the "high priestess" of their cult. She will there learn that only four cult members are still in the elvish capital, the hundreds of others having disappeared years ago, leaving behind the "unworthy" as they went on a doomed/evil quest... to the dungeon the player just fled.

Two of these four "unworthies" will join your party permanently, and one - the one your news has turned into the order's de-facto "leader", a cranky middle-aged woman who looks like Cithis with her head shaved - is romanceable *only* if you're playing as the female half-foot cultist and she's the very first person you warn about the orcs. She will disappear from the plot of the game entirely if you fail to do this.

Additionally: the game has kinda Soulsborne-y action gameplay, but it's heavily-geared towards stealth and avoidance of enemies. The cultists' skillsets - particularly the half-foot cultist and Not-Cithis - are mechanically by far the easiest way to play the game. The dream spent like 20 minutes making me do boring grindy swordfights with the glitched dwarf origin.

Most boss fights encourage the player to control one or more plot-relevant allies who have specialized skills that will do most of the actual damage. Not-Cithis is the best character for the final boss fight, and also the fight with your minotaur dad - *if* you want to permakill him.