#ps: Im gonna do what I want on my own blog

[onlysushicat]

it's either john or june, jfc. if you like her dont post him or his name under her tag!!! i dont wanna see that nasty shit associated with my gal

[aihoshiino]

okay so no idea how i should refer to myself as so: hi!! im the person who had way too much fun writing ai/nino toxic yuri on ao3! i was gonna just lurk (me, tumblr account with privated likes, reblogs and follows) BUT how could i with the promise of people being normal about fictional unhealthy gay women. idk if this is the optimal way to communicate i use tumblr with the sole purpose of following 4 people and digging up ai content

i am honestly so flattered (but also kinda upset at the lack of content on them aside from my own 1k word long oneshot please keep recommending if you find more stuff on them) that you enjoyed and recommended my fics considering i just straight up had no clue where i was going: okay so top priority i want them to kiss —> but also with how things are nino would probably lash out (read: bite) —> ai would be hesitant but also is so desperate that she’d still accept it happily —> this will fuel ninos idea of ai being the perfect, invincible idol —> and then i ran and tried not to trip with the rest

your translations of the side stories and blog was probably what helped me get in to oshi no ko again because even though i am still not over ai being dead i can now listen to someone talk about how great and tragic and sad and miserable she was along with all the other characters so thank you again!

also that ask for ai/nino toxic yuri visions was me lol, thanks for talking about my fic despite how short it was <3, i might de-anon myself at some point but rn im too shy for that

woof, this got a bit long. anyways love wins fr, if there was ever a day where i participate in an onk shipping war it’ll be on the side of them

LMFAO OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY TO HAVE JUMPSCARED YOU WITH YOUR OWN FIC 😭 WHAT A THING TO SEE ON YOUR OWN DASH....

that said it does make me so happy every time I hear people saying my relentless oshi no posting stands out to them to the degree that it does lol. I guess I'm in a similar place as you where, as happy as I am for it, it does make me a little sad that it feels like there's such little fan interest in lengthy meta and discussion on Ai herself outside of some really banal, surface level stuff. To a degree, I get that with other characters having so much more time on the page and having ongoing arcs to speculate about, but Ai is sooooooooo fascinating to me and it really drives me insane how often I see people make zero effort to engage with her arc beyond her utilitarian function in the story. It also really bums me out how often I see her get reduced to just a stepping stone in the arcs of other characters — even though the manga is literally shaking you right now and begging you to understand and empathize with her more than ever, I straight up see people cheering and crowing about Ruby 'surpassing' her or 'becoming the true Ai' as if this is a good thing and they are not completely fucking missing the point lmao.

ANYWAY!!!! That's enough grumping because the actual point of this response was to say: the Ai posting will continue until I am physically forced to stop!!!! I have so many thoughts about my wife constantly and if I do not share them I will explode!!!

(ps anon pspspspsp if you are ever feeling brave enough to unanon pls feel free to just send me your discord or your socmeds off tumblr if that is less intimidating for u.... honestly that goes for all my oshi no moots in general Please Talk With Me In DMs About My Wife)

[monstercampus]

Hello! Congrats on this awesome start on your monster lover blog! This is my first ever anon message I've sent, so sorry if I sound/write(?) a little awkward! ^^;

I found you through your other blog, first with your ST writings and then I just kept reading through all the other stuff you've written. I really love your headcanons, thoughts and one shots, and I can't wait to see what you're gonna do with this blog! :D I'm excited to read what you're gonna do with all the monster characters you introduced already, let alone the ones still in the works! Maybe at some point I'll find some courage to share my thoughts and/or ideas on either of your blogs, but for now, I can't wait to see how you build upon the foundation you've already laid! (PS, I already love cute, shy, teeny pixie gf! Yes, I would love some little kisses smooched all over my face, thank you. *u* PPS, King Bee?? Like, fluffy MothMan, but Pervy Bee?? Oohh :0 PPPS, maybe, perhaps, if you would want, you could include a Big, Muscular, Beefy(heh) Minotaur person, who'd, you know, be able to easily put you on their shoulder, regardless of your own stature 'cause you're a lil human and they're biiiig, and give you a lil tummy/thigh smooch any time they want... Just spitballin' here-)

Anyway, I don't know how to end this, so hope you have fun with this blog! Have a nice day! :D

omg thank you for sticking with me!!! :D and I'd love to hear your ideas, i super wanna write the weird stuff (within reason ofc LOL) so i lean heavily on anon asks like yours for inspiration teehee! <3

also im glad you like the pixies!! i have lots of lewds in mind for them so look forward to it >:) king bee too! if you're curious about him I'll make sure to hurry up his introduction, ive got some ideas for "bee gunk" so to speak ehehe......and I've got a minotaur (and mothman) on my list to flesh out too!! I've got a bunch of monster ideas written out so i can draw from them when I've got some new ideas, so I'd love to write a piece for one of those big ol bois <33 honestly there's so much one can do with the monster concept so im super super pumped to try it all out!! ty for giving me ideas and support hehe!! <3

[barnesbabee]

If someone don't learn bout something deeply, they will only get to judge what is shown on the outer side.

Someone was stopped from entering because they had a gay flag on their shirt. Out of many shirt they can wear, they choose gay flag shirt...ok.

I don't care about Qatar's rules, When in Rome, Do as the Romans.

if they want to host a fucking world cup then be prepared for all the different types of people you're going to receive. Again, When in Rome, Do as the Romans. The people also need to prepare themselves for different type of culture.

Im not unfollowing you though. It was so much fun to have around. Most issues that you post in here is giving my brain an exercise.

it's clear to me you have no idea what the world cup is about so I won't waste my time, but since you're too fucking stupid to understand I will say it once more: if your country wants to host an event that unites all countries and cultures, be prepared to have different people with different beliefs in your country. Curious how that was the only part that you decided not to refute yet it was the main argument in all responses I've given you, you just decided to use a dumb saying. Are you saying that people must take off their hijabs when they go to Europe because it's not our culture? Or do you recognize Qatar's oppressive and violent behaviour and agree that people should be treated that way if they want to attend the world cup?

and yes they chose to wear the gay flag shirt to rebel against a garbage country that goes against basic human rights

the stupidity is baffling, my blog isn't a place for conservative bigots that defend these countries, disgusting.

also a little ps, please learn english if you're gonna try to 'own' someone cause the grammar is nearly as baffling as the bad arguments and responses, thanks.

[transcendence-through-exposure]

Hello and welcome to my page (If anyone does see this) i want to start with an introduction.

let's just say my name is D and with alot of years of battling my own demons, I've finally have an understanding with them to live in balance with myself. i would delete all the posts I shared but after looking at them i realized how depressed i really was growing up. It's a place in my mind i had forgotten about until recently and has been building up for some time now, so I've come here to share.

For some reason it's a trigger to be asked if I'm okay. I can't fully say im happy, but im at a point where i just can't feel emotions like i used to. I tried the whole emotion thing after being numb for so long... And so far it's only caused problems. for example, I've recently opened myself to have new friends ( because I've only ever hung out with the same group of friends since i was a child.)

Lets say i work with music not gonna be too specific but i ended up working with a fundraising group who i will not name and discovered the world of sober bars. I don't wanna say i had a problem with alcohol or drugs but i realized what i had been doing to myself but that's another story i will share, I'm currently 5 years off drugs and 3 years no alcohol or soda (nothing too hardcore) just liked to party when i was younger guess it was a coping mechanism for me and when someone close passed i went down a spiral it was the only thing that kept me numb. I used to love that numb feeling and the flavor of alcohol.. i miss it sometimes but im definitely a better person without it. growing up i was always around alcohol, drugs, and gang members. Back in the day it wasn't entirely safe in my neighborhood but im getting off subject again so i will definitely write about that in a later blog.

Back to what i was talking about long story short i let people into my circle and i guess for some reason i have this tendency to wanna help people when i have nothing to give a quote i always remember is " never pour from an empty cup" and i like to say " im not a cup. I'm the person who guides the water to the cup." Meaning im here to build you up, a way to turn the flow to fill up the cups of others. I don't know if I'll ever have a true happiness. again, it's a trigger and truly makes me cry sometimes even though im usually really good with not feeling anything.

Kinda why i started my career in music. It was a new version of me that i chose in my pursuit of happiness. I can honestly say if it wasn't for music i wouldn't be here right now. it's better than any drug or alcohol and gave the feeling of pure serenity. I want to show people that there's a world that cares for you even when there's no one around. When you need that conversation but dont have anyone to talk to. It's crazy to think that a total stanger can talk through this beautiful art to your soul and be able to heal from it.

I think that's enough for tonight it's about 3AM and started this on the beach (where i usually go to throw all my negative thoughts). I'm tired, ive been more tired than usually recently but i don't let it stop me from getting things done most of the time i dont want to. but i always push myself to get it done. Growing up depressed i learned to cope with it so i really dont feel emotions as hard as I used to

ps. Im not sad or happy im just good enough to get through everyday knowing that we're all destined for greatness, I'm more at peace with myself and understand my feelings. Im self centered, in balance with my thoughts and emotions. hope i can help others whether it be a story, music or personal poetry.

Ok now im done, Thank you so much for reading, hope to see you again peace and love ☯️ .

[marias-wonderland]

I posted 1,508 times in 2022

That's 925 more posts than 2021!

26 posts created (2%)

1,482 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@shinzo-no-yami ~<3

@louisfriend-ironsulfide

@funnytwittertweets

@kaoribriefs

@my-mild-ginger

I tagged 966 of my posts in 2022

Only 36% of my posts had no tags

#hellsing - 308 posts

#clarice starling - 236 posts

#hannibal - 204 posts

#hellsing ultimate - 198 posts

#clannibal - 193 posts

#alucard - 156 posts

#alucard hellsing - 151 posts

#silence of the lambs - 144 posts

#integra hellsing - 108 posts

#integra - 97 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#but perhaps try to actually be content with the life you have before start criticizing people that seem actually ok with what they have???

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hello to the 10 people in this site that are clannibal fans! I found (and finished) this EXCELLENT piece of a fanfic and i thought i should share it with the rest of you!

The story is about rewriting the books -silence of the lambs- and -hannibal- but let me tell you, the writter did a superb job at this! 

In this scenario: Hannibal meets clarice when she is 18 and he is 38. She is still at the orphanage and wants to become an FBI agent. Hannibal is...well, hannibal, but they develop a special bond (obviously) and change each others perspective about reality. Im not gonna say a lot, only that the last chapters are full of plot twists!! (and yes, there are a lot of clannibal moments in there :3)

only thing though: the fic is in polish so ya have to use google translate.

22 notes - Posted January 14, 2022

#4

*Alucard and Integra making out in her office after a mini fight they`ve had*

Seras who walks in at the wrong time: :O 

Pip: Damn, that osculated quickly :3

32 notes - Posted January 22, 2022

#3

Post-SoTL letters

So I've been thinking of writing a post SoTL Clannibal fic in which they sent letters to each other. But because my energy levels reach negative amounts, I never did it. Yesterday i found out about the theory of Solipsism and it seems our good doctor wanted to share it with Clarice (please share with me if you liked it and if you would like to read more.)

Dear Clarice

Please tell me Clarice, are you aware of the theory of Solipsism? If not, it is the idea that only one’s mind is sure to exist and that everything outside of it, external world and other minds, cannot be known and might not exist outside the mind.  While it is not widely accepted by the vox populi, I included, I would be certain that you not only exist but also enhance my own world. You are the last virtue that came out of Pandora’s Box, Hope, and I could not be gladder that you escaped of your prison. A militant spirit encompassed with the credulity of a sheep truly makes a memorable existence. But even if the theory is true and you never truly existed, you are my most perfect idea I’ve ever been able to grasp, an entity that I would never dare to abandon. I will keep carrying you within the rooms of my own mind for the rest of my existence.

Prattling sure makes time fly, please share with me your opinion about it and perhaps deign to show me a piece of your own mind palace.

Ps: I promise I will not snoop around the nearby doors but, I highly suggest you lock the ones you do not wish me to find for the time being.

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Dear Dr. Lecter

I would lie if i say i wasn't touched by your remarks about me. As for the theory, my answer is that i didn't know about it, thank you for enlightening me. I find it rather absurd that existence only exists within one's mind, how can the mind of a clueless man produce the reality in which we all more or less live in? I would argue that perception of said reality can be interpreted differently depending on the individual and on what kind of path they've chosen to follow but, this is beyond my understanding.

You said that i represent the freed hope, the embodiment of every virtue that is worthy of being kept alive in this sorrowful world, your most perfect creation. And yet, how did you choose to treat this embodiment? You lied to me and used me for gaining your freedom. You manipulated me and due to that, 2 officers lost their lives. If the theory is correct, why did you choose to center yourself around despair and chaos? Why does your mind only produce horror and sorrow? The theory elevates us one step before God Himself and yet, you chose to almost show me your cruelest face.

Our meeting made me stronger, wiser, better and more confident than before so I have to answer honestly. I would never allow of myself to remain locked within no one's mind, Doctor, no matter if i were a real person or not. Be aware of that.

Ps. It's in your nature to try and unlock the locks of one's mind. You are welcome to remain in the first rooms but i will also make sure the rest of the locks are double locked

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Dear Clarice

Unbeknownst to you, the secrets of your inner mechanisms have been slowly revealing themselves to me. But I suggest we rash for no revelation yet, shall we? The Cartesian egocentric view of the mind and of the physical existence ,Clarice, does not depend on your average Joe for producing the world we are living in. Solipsism rests upon that all experiences are necessarily private to the individual. Because of its “occult” or ephemeral nature, can never literally be shared. No two people can ever be said to have the same experience.( Just like our first meeting one might say. We certainly carry different memories of the same events)You know I would never lie to you (But unfortunately in that case, someone else was the first who betrayed my trust). When I say you are the embodiment of every little good virtue in this man made world I truly mean it, we both spare ourselves the use of vacant statements.You keep asking me these questions Clarice and yet, why do I feel they are directed at someone else? (perhaps someone who enjoys the destruction of the faith of His believers?). I would suggest you start unlocking those locks not for me, but for yourself. Please tell me, what does it lay behind those well kept locked doors, all dusted and hidden? Is it perhaps pent-up anger? at me for betraying your trust which was build in a manner of days or is it directed at your daddy for abandoning you, because he was so caught up with his own image of himself that a couple of hoodlums had to remind him of his place in the food chain?

I said to you back then the world is more interesting with you in it, and I still hold that belief. Your place is not being an usurper’s ownership but you belong out there, wherever you wish to be. If there is something I enjoy, it is an intellectual conversation with you. Please, don't hold back the acute criticism you so much wish to hurl at me. Ps: I found the use of the word ‘almost’ amusing. Even at your most confused state, you never dare question my appreciation for you.

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Dear Dr. Lecter

I think it is time to put aside philosophy for a moment because that is not what you truly want to discuss with me. These meta-theoretical ideas were never useful to me, I had to prove myself worthy in different aspects.

You said that I am in a ‘confused state’ and yet, it is you who can not seem to decide in which end of the spectrum you fall in. You keep talking about this indescribable adulation towards me and yet, you refuse to confess you betrayed my trust. A young woman was in the hands of a serial killer you very much knew of and yet, you toyed with me and with the entire FBI for your own delectation. Υou have decried every person that has ever wronged me in your eyes or does not treat me with the respect you think i deserve and yet, you are no different than them. They view me as a fragile defective girl, not potent enough for the world of men but unfortunately to them, i proved to be more adaptable to change.  You, on the other hand, also dehumanize me. They did it for the sake of their vested interest, you did it for completing your self made image of an idealised woman.

If there is anger within me, it is for the ones who wish to deceive and harm the innocent. For those i hold no remorse or sympathy. I loved my father and no one can make me question that. And since you patronised me to do not hold back my critism, i find your speculations about me poorly executed, especially for someone who claims he has started understanding my inner world.

Let me unlock a door for you. I wish to find a person who views me as I truly am. No country girl or wounded entity. Just my name would be enough. Just Clarice. Do whatever you want with this piece of information. I have never shied away from myself and i will not start now. Ps: Our conversations can truly be meaningful when you don’t wish to stir up past emotions and regrets 

38 notes - Posted November 28, 2022

#2

I did something (feel free to add more)

88 notes - Posted September 13, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

110 notes - Posted November 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[xelsjournal]

oop its 4:20 am ikdr 🌬🤪 dec 15 2022

first blog post on the new blog whoop whoop. im not gonna rlly censor myself over here or put too much thought into the audience for this one. who knows, maybe the posts will be private. prolly not tho cuz that defeats the purpose. if this writerly exploratory period in my life. i know im out of galance rn and its cuz im in transition but i crave balance and internal piece. but its up to me to secure them for myself, so im like aware of this looming spiritual journey for me coming up but tbh i have no fucking clue what its gonna look like lmaooooo. i thought i had a spiritual practice and some understanding at one point but frankly while thats what j needed at the time and brought me here, that was blatant ego and pride talking cuz i kinda didnt know shit. i still dint know shit, but i thought i knew SOME things. and i did and i do. but while i know a lot, i dont know more, and because im shifting realities, what i once knew is no longer what is true so i also need to confront everything i think i know about spirit, the universe, my ancestors, my spirit team, my self, my path, my community, my home, my perception, my reality, my energy (i can keep going too) *deep breath*… i just have a lot of something awaiting me. a lot of discovery and newness and to be honest im a little daunted. not in a “i dont wannt go” way but in a “im going ziplining for the first time” way. like it looks kinda fun kinda horrifying, def exhilarating, def incomparable to anything ive experienced yet and i know i need to prepare myself and have all my qs and ps about me so i can have the experience im supposed to experience but i know itll be life changing for the best so im not too worried about it but i do have butterflies all up and in my gut type of anticipation. i have no reference point for what im boutta experience but i know that ill provide the something thats been feeling off rn, like itll scratch the itch i been feeling. its what ive been waiting for for like 3 years now and im pretty excited. but whew i do not actually know what to expect. im certainly not gonna rush it lmaoooo but ig yall can read about it in real time here if u want 😂 grateful to be here and to have space to speak and share my thoughts. im grateful to have my words resonate in the minds of people all over the globe. im grateful for the power of the voice, the pen, im grateful for my power in wielding them, and im grateful for every opportunity to share my mind, my heart, my toils, my euphoria with the world of my own volition. im grateful for those who inevitably will see them and share in or bare witness to my thoughts.

anyway chile im going to sleep sksks gn

[patd--phan]

Wanna Be Yours

Pairing: Dadsbestfriend! Bucky (mid/late 40s) x reader (in early/mid twenties)

Summary: Y/N surprises bucky on a business trip and he promises to be hers.

Warnings: SMUTTY stuff (18+ only pleasee), unprotected sex, creampie, oral sex (m receiving), riding, teasing, significant age gap, reader takes charge, “Doll/sweets/baby/sweetheart”, some cute ass shit at the beginning and end tho

WC: about 3K im sorry I was really H*rny yesterday and I was unable to do anything about it as i was stuck in the car all damn day

Note: So I was really h*rny yesterday and this happened lol I’m sorry. Loosely based on the song wanna be yours-arctic monkeys. Also this will probably be the only smut I ever write bc I don’t wanna become an 18+ blog or make anyone uncomfortable (not that 18+ blogs are bad tho lemme set that straight, most of my fav blogs are)

PS thank you for the love on my first ever fic with Peter Parker x reader, it made me so happy that ppl didn’t think I suck lol ( and i guess i lied saying i would probably never write another one shot lol)

You do NOT have my permission to repost this anywhere, I will come for u if you plagiarize ok bye

It was no secret that Bucky liked to be in charge in the bedroom, and you had absolutely no problem with that. After all, he was older and more experienced; he knew how to make your body sing. But this week you were craving something a little different. Bucky had been away on a business trip all weekend and you really missed him, not just the sex (but I mean…) but just cuddling and talking to him about your day; you were feeling clingy. You decide to text bucky even though you knew he couldn’t answer right away because he was currently in a meeting.

Y/N: I mis youu :( when will you be back tomorrow?

You just wandered around your apartment for the next 20 minutes, casually checking your phone about every 30 seconds just in case bucky was able to sneak in a text. He finally replied after 30 minutes, right as his meeting was ending at 3.

Bucky: Hey doll, I miss you too <3

Bucky: unfortunately one of the investors this morning had to push their meeting to late tomorrow afternoon, so I’m not gonna be home until very late tomorrow night :(

Y/N: dammit :(

Y/N: well good luck at the pitch meeting tomorrow, I love and miss you <3

Bucky: don’t gimme that pout I know your making doll, ill see you tonight on facetime! :)

Y/N: haha u know me so well, and yes you’ll see me tonight ;) (but I still miss u)

Bucky: I know doll I hate it too, see you tonight. Love you <3

Y/n: love you too <3

You didn’t know if you could go until late Monday without seeing bucky. As you laid on the couch smiling sadly about missing your love, an idea popped into your head. He was only two and a half hours away, and he wouldn’t be back at his hotel for another 4 hours at least. Fuck it, you were gonna go drive to his hotel and surprise him. You couldn’t be away so long, you felt super clingy this weekend and you needed to be on top of with him.

You quickly ran around your apartment, packing an overnight bag and you saw the package that arrived earlier on your floor that you completely forgot about because you couldn’t stop thinking of Bucky. You remembered its contents e(a completely evil lingerie set) and threw it in the bag with a smirk on your face.

The drive to Bucky’s hotel felt like forever and you had to remind yourself to stop speeding because you were so excited. When you finally got to his hotel, you had to convince the manager to give you a key to his room, proving that you were the man’s girlfriend with several pictures on your phone which was slightly embarrassing because in almost every picture, at least one of you was half-naked. Worth it. You thought. When you arrived in his room you quickly went into the bathroom to change into a little black dress (with a surprise underneath). Then as you were sitting on his bed waiting for him, you realized it would still be a while before he would get back, so you decided to tidy up his things, packing his clothes and organizing his suitcase. Pleased with your work, you sat back down on the bed and looked at your phone for a while. You finally got pulled out of your Instagram daze when you heard Bucky’s voice in the hallway laughing at something a coworker said. You quickly threw your phone on the dresser, straightened up you dress, and sat at the edge of the bed with a huge smile on your face, giddy to surprise him.

As he turned the doorknob he was still looking behind him talking to the man. When he finally said goodbye and turned his head around, his eyebrows raised up and his jaw dropped, which was quickly replaced with a smile even larger than yours.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, running towards you and throwing his briefcase on the floor.

He picked you up in a tight hug and you squealed, legs immediately wrapping around his waist.

“I told you you’d see me tonight!” you said, still clung to him like a koala.

“W-what?” He replied, still in shock. Letting your legs fall back to the floor.

“I just missed you too much” you shrugged.

If any human could embody “heart eyes” it was Bucky at that moment- he’s such a softie for you. He pulled your face towards him and gave you one of the most loving kisses you’ve ever had in your life. You were expecting it to be passionate and rough, but it was soft, delicate and loving, and your heart melted into a puddle. After your lips parted, you gazed into each other’s eyes before being pulled up in another tight hug. You giggled and wrapped your legs around him again.

“I guess you missed me too huh?” you laughed.

“Oh doll, you have no idea.”

You wrapped your hands in his hair, massaging his neck and he moaned loudly.

“Mm, that feels nice.” He hummed.

“You tired baby?” you asked, he seemed like he needed some TLC (and you were ready to give it to him).

“I am so exhausted.” He replied, making you frown behind his back.

You slowly slid down his body, back onto your feet again, and kept massaging his head. He looked at you lovingly before looking around his hotel room, his eyebrows pulled in confusion.

“Did you clean up in here?”

“Yep, while I was waiting for ya,” you replied, smiling.

His whole face softened.

“Oh, I really don’t deserve you doll.” Making you smile and shake your head.

“Oh yes you do.” You replied making him smile and his heart flutter in his chest.

He pulled you in for another kiss, this one with more fire and longing in it than the last one. His large hands grabbed you ass to pull you closer to him and you moaned into the kiss. You pressed your body against him even tighter and ran your hands through his hair making him moan. You could feel his pants tent start to grow against you and you smirked and moved you lips down to the side of his neck making him groan.

You pull back and look at him, hard and eyes half lidded, it turns you on so much you feel your panties dampening.

“Hey Buck?” you whisper, lips mere inches apart.

“Hmm?” he hums in response.

“I have another surprise for you.” You whisper into his ear before pulling back to look at his face.

“What’s that, doll?” he whispers.

You smirk and step away from him, noticing the confusion on his face before you pull your dress over your head and throw it onto the floor.

Bucky’s jaw drops, making you bite your lip and smirk even more. This was gonna be fun.

“Oh, fuck me,” He groans.

“Oh, I fully intend on it, Buck” you smirk.

He just groans and starts walking towards you.

“Buck?”

“Yeah sweets?”

“Wanna be mine tonight?”

“Fuck, I’ll be yours forever doll.” He says, making you whimper. You pull him against you by his tie, pressing your bodies together.

Your lips crash and tongues swirl together fighting for dominance. Hands moving up and down each other’s bodies like animals. Bucky squeezing your ass so tight you know there’s gonna be marks.

You both pull back enough so you can shimmy off Bucky’s tie and throw it over his head before unbuttoning his shirt and peeling it off him. You then sink to your knees and undo his belt quickly before slowly unzipping his pants, kissing the outside of his member though his pants making him exhale a breath sharply.

“Fuck” he breathes out.

You don’t want to tease him too much (yet) so after another kiss, you shove his pants off and lay down on the bed, his body caging you under him.

The passionate makeout session resumes with Bucky still hard in his boxers pressing against your clothed core. You suddenly remember what you wanted and pull back from the kiss.

“Wait, no” you whisper.

Bucky pulls back, confused and nervous he did something to hurt you.

“What’s wrong?” he whispers.

You take advantage of his confusion and roll him over so you were straddling him with a smirk on your face.

Bucky moans at your actions, core pressing tight against him.

“You said you’d be mine.” You breathe over his lips. Moaning as being in charge is giving you a whole rush of feelings and confidence.

You kiss him, and he lets you dominate the kiss this time, biting his lips and grinding on him. He bucks his hips onto your and you pull back.

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll take care of you, I’ll make you feel so good.”

Bucky moans at your words as you start to kiss all the way down his body, leaving little hickies down his chest. When you get towards his boxers he thinks your gonna kiss his member or pull down his boxers, but instead you go back up his chest, licking a stripe from his belly button all the way to one of his nipples, up his neck, to his lips.

Bucky moans, loud. You give him one more kiss before deciding to stop teasing him (kinda). You quickly kiss down his chest again and then plant a few kisses on his aching cock through his boxers. He bucks his hips and is whimpering under you. Fuck, that turns you on. Your big strong boyfriend who could probably crush you with one arm, whimpering and practically begging under you. Your panties are fucking soaked and you don’t think you can deny your own pleasure too much longer. You pull down his boxers and his cock is throbbing and dripping precum.

“Shit” you moan at the sight.

You lick the precum off him and he gives a high pitched moan that goes straight to your core.

“Baby please, I- I can’t.”

“Don’t worry baby I got you.” You reply as you take his full member into your mouth, sucking lightly.

Bucky moans and bucks his hips into your mouth. You push them back down and suck a few more times before getting off of him. He looks worried for a second before you slide your panties off and straddle his cock.

“Still wanna be mine?”

“Always” he replies.

You sink down onto him, jaw dropping and eyes closing at the feeling. You don’t think you’ll ever get used to him no matter how many times he’s been inside you. You both moan as his whole cock is finally buried inside you.

“Fuck Bucky, you feel so fucking good in me.” You moan, starting to rock your hips.

“God, I’m so fucking wet for you.”

Bucky continues to give low moans as you start to ride him.

“Fuck baby, I love you like this.” He says, making you start to ride him harder, moaning at his words.

His hands come grab your hips to help you ride him faster, harder.

“Baby- shit I’m close already.” He pleads.

“All for me? Shit baby aren’t I the lucky one?” You moan.

Bucky’s grip on your hips tighten and he starts to fuck up into you. He was about to blow.

You moan loudly at the feeling. “Cum in me baby please I need it.”

After a particularly hard thrust into your wet pussy you feel him spilling inside you. He lets out one of those vulgar high pitched moans and grunts that make your brain short circuit and your eyes roll back while your pussy clenches around him. You feel yourself getting close, but you want to give him another orgasm, so you sink down on him fully and slowly ride him, hearing him whimpering and moaning. You feel him get hard in you again (thank you supersoldier serum) and you rock back and forth on him. You reach down to rub your clit, but Bucky sees it and swats your hand away, replacing it with his metal one.

“Oh fuck” you moan at the cool sensation.

You start to bounce up and down on him again, the knot in your abdomen building and heating up. You feel yourself close to being undone as you ride him and his other hand runs up your body and squeezes your nipple through your thin lace bra. You moan and feel yourself clench around him, making him moan.

“Fuck- I’m gonna c-“ you get interrupted by the white hot explosion of your orgasm. Your eyes roll back, jaw hangs open and toes curl as you feel that release knock throughout your whole body, making you shake. You let out those high pitched moans and whines that only Bucky makes you feel.

Feeling you clench around him and watching your completely fucked out face, you feel Bucky’s thick cock twitch inside of you, and you moan as you feel him release in you again. Fuck that makes you feel good. So good you can’t think or move and you start to collapse on top of Bucky, but he slightly catches you and lays you down on his chest, both breathing heavy, with his cock still inside you, cum dripping all down your legs and onto Bucky.

You can’t speak, can’t think, the pleasure totally ruining you. After what feels like forever, you feel your breathing start to return to normal, as does Bucky’s, and you feel his hand rubbing up and down your back, grounding you back to earth from wherever on cloud nine you were.

You hum as you feel yourself finally calm down.

“Holy fuck, doll” you feel him lowly whine in your ear. You can only moan lowly in response.

“Baby that was fucking amazing.”

“Mmhmm.” You hum.

“…but I think I’m gonna lose my mind if you keep clenching around me.” He chuckles.

“oh shit, sorry,” you mumble out. You try to push up off of him but the farthest you got was placing your hands on his shoulders before your body gave up on you.

“Oh my God, I can’t move” you whisper. You’re so fucked out, your body won’t respond to your brain anymore.

Bucky moans at your words and slowly rolls both of you so youre on your side facing him. He reaches down and pulls his soft cock out of your pussy, moaning when he sees a burst of cum leaking from you.

You moan at the feeling of him exiting your body. You look him in the eyes and give him a lazy smile. His eyes sparkle back at you and his hand comes up to rub your cheek.

“Mm” you hum at the feeling.

“That was fucking incredible” he says, making you smile wider.

“I’m not disagreeing” you quip.

He chuckles lightly before saying “you gotta do this more often.”

“What, surprise you on business trips?” you question.

“No” he rolls his eyes and smiles, “Well yes actually, but I was talking about you absolutely taking charge tonight.”

“Oh yeah?” you smirk.

“Fuck yeah doll, I don’t think I’ve ever cum as hard. You looked so damn sexy in charge.”

You look away from his eyes, shying at his words, but also they were giving you the confidence to look right back into his eyes and say “I agree” with a smirk.

“I love hearing those high pitched moans you make, It turns me on so much” you admit.

“You know, only you can get those noises out of me, doll” he chides. You blush and smile at him.

He chuckles and you bring his face towards yours and kiss him deeply, tongues meeting together. You both hum into the kiss as his hand rubs down the side of your body.

When you break the kiss, both of you needing a breath, he pulls your body towards him, resting your head on his chest. You hum in peace as he rubs your back.

“I love you so much Y/N” he says and you feel your heart absolutely burst in your chest.

“I love you so much too Buck,” you reply, lifting your head to peck him on the lips before placing your head back on his chest.

You lay in silence for a minute before your mind begins to wander again.

“Did you mean it?” you ask.

“Mean what, doll?”

“That you’ll be mine forever?” you ask. “I mean not just in the sexy way but that you’ll be with me forever?” you ramble out.

“God yes sweetheart, you’re the one for me.” He responds and you didn’t think your heart could explode anymore, but it just did.

You squeeze his shoulder with your hand before coming up to kiss him passionately again, almost crying at all of the love going though you.

“I promise I’m all yours forever too, Buck” you smile at him.

“Good,” he smiles back, and you rest back on his chest, eyes getting droopy.

“Night-night sweetheart.” You feel yourself smile in your sleep.

“Goodnight my love.” You reply, further cuddling into his chest. Bucky feels his heart combust in his chest. God, wasn’t he lucky to have you. He didn’t know what he did to deserve you, but he knew that he was going to assure you that you deserve the world every day for the rest of his life. He kissed the top of your head before falling into a deep sleep, content with his favorite person tight in his arms.

[jdmslut-red]

Alright hear me out… I’ve got this idea for a Loki x Daenerys story that I can’t get out of my brain

Figures… when I actually have time to think I get inspired instead of sleeping or relaxing on my time off 😅 I warned you guys, I’m in Loki world right now

Ok so in the events leading up to and during Ragnorak, Thor and Loki come upon the 7 kingdoms and meet our queen Danny. Im not gonna spoil too much in case I do decide to write this but I’m thinking of different ideas of how this will play out. I just need to explain and write this out cause currently my brain is like this is great… 😅 But basically, Thor and Loki help Danny and the others defeat the white walkers. After the battle is won Thor returns to Asgard to defeat Hela. Loki later joins him against Daenerys wishes. He promised her he would return however. ( by that time Loki and Danerys had already developed feelings and of course expect lots of kinky smut involving… magic 😏) but they never admitted straight out how much they actually cared for each other.

Anyway, after Asgard is destroyed. Thor, Loki and the rest of the survivors come back to the 7 kingdoms. Thor begs Daenerys to take the Asgardian citizens under her protection, which she does. Thor then tells Daenerys and Loki he’s going after thanos. Loki decides to go with him but Danerys pleads him not to. Loki promises her he would return to her again. Before they could speak again thanos appears in the 7 kingdoms as well looking for the tesseract in which Loki had taken.

After a somewhat lengthy battle, in which a lot people die including Daenerys second dragon. (The first one dying in white walker battle) Daenerys is furious and charges at thanos. He easily takes her down of course but before he could kill her Loki saves her, sacrificing him self (much like the painful death scene we all know)

Danerys holds a dying Loki in her arms while they finally confessed their love for each other. Anyways, Thor wants to go to earth to join the avengers. He pleads Danny to go with him but she declines, telling him she still needed to win the throne.

After witnessing her closest friends death, both of her dragons and the love of her life die before her arms, Danny whirlwinds into madness much like in the show. Burning the whole city to the ground. However, in my story jon snow doesn’t actually kill her. Having been taught some magic by Loki, Danny fakes her own death with an illusion before killing jon snow herself.

Ok so I haven’t really decided how she ends up in a different time line, there are possibilities. But basically the TVA finally tracks her down in which she meets present or past Loki I guess. There’s a lot more to it, but I just wanted to explain the important bits and see what you guys think. Cause in my head and typing this out now I’m like oh this sounds epic 😅 but knowing me and how complicated the MCU and Game of thrones universes are (especially since I don’t keep up with anything that Loki is not involved in) it’ll probably be shit 😅

Here’s some screenshots of a little sneak peek of a scene I wrote on my phone where past Loki escapes the TVA with Danny…

Ps: If I do ended up writing this I’ll probably only post on my archive or maybe create another blog idk yet. I mean I can barely keep up with this one with my life being chaos right now 😅

[pigstepmp3-moved]

holy hell, gamers, i finally reached one whole thousand followers! how bonkers is that! when i first made this blog in december 2018, i was just trying to start over in a new fandom. ive been active on tumblr for a looong time (since i was like 11, which is. not great, but we wont get into that). i cant remember quite why i decided to remake, but i never imagined getting a higher following than i did before, but i did! 1000 followers is bonkers, i’ve never had a thousand of anything! i seriously cant thank each and every one of you enough, whether you followed me for 911 or for mcyt or for whatever!

now, since ive reached this absolutely bonkers milestone, im feeling particularly sappy! so under the cut, i have some friends and mutuals tagged who are super great n who are always an absolute pleasure to see on my dash! <3 again, thank you all so much! (ps, if we’re mutuals and i didnt tag u in this, that doesnt mean i dont love and appreciate you!! i mostly am just picking people to tag based off how often i see them on my dash! i love all of u so much <3)

♡ 911 FRIENDS ♡

(aka the ogs, aka the fire fam)

♡ @lovelessmotel ♡ emily!! god, where do i even begin with how much i love and adore you!! i know youre one of my big sisters, but wow i am so proud of how much youve discovered yourself since we’ve met!! like wow, look at this epic, gorgeous person whos one of MY close friends! im so lucky to be friends with you! thank you so much for being my friend, i appreciate you and all the sisterly advice you’ve given me more than i can ever put into words!

♡ @eddiediaz-buckley ♡ sav!! mom!! i love u so unbelievably much!! i am so unbelievably grateful for you and everything youve done for me! all the advice youve given me and all the times youve let me vent to you have been so important to me and i cannot thank you enough for all that. im soso appreciative of you and im so glad that i have someone as amazing as you as my mom/big sister (we’ll never really figure out our fams family dynamics, will we?) (ps, whenever i go outside and have my keys with me, its always so comforting to feel the keychain you got me! its like my moms with me everywhere i go!)

♡ @liesoverthec ♡ bonbonbonbon!!! i love you so much, you wouldnt BELIEVE how much i love you!!! im so glad we met bc you are so unbelievably kind!! there is a very good reason a nickname for u is bonbon bc you are just as sweet as candy!! maybe even more so!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, you give such wonderful advice and talking to you always makes me feel a million times better!! i love you and i am soso glad i get to call you my friend!

♡ @marauder-girl ♡ sabsabsab!! i love u so much, u funky lil future lawyer!! im so proud of u and i can hardly believe ur gonna be my Lawyer big sister!!! thats so awesome!! i cant believe such a rad person is one of MY friends!! how lucky am i!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, youre so kind and funny and talented and your advice has always been so helpful to me too! thank you so much for being my friend and for always being there for me!!

♡ @nighting-gale17 ♡ cait, my love, my wifey!!! wowowow i love u so much!!! im so glad we’re friends, you are so unbelievably lovely!! youre also so unbelievably talented like??? hey queen wanna hand some of ur writing ability over to the unfortunate (like me). i’m so glad we’re friends, youre so sweet and even tho we dont talk as much as we used to, i still have SO much love for you in my heart

♡ @africaneuropean ♡ rae, my father!! i love u so much!! i know we havent talked at all in. who knows how long. but i still have so much love for u in my heart!! you are so iconic and cool and funny, im so glad i met you n became friends with you!! ur one of the coolest people i know, i hope i can be as cool and mysterious and wonderful as you one day

♡ @evaneddie ♡ DHYL!!! dhyl pickle i love u so much!!! whenever u pop into my inbox with random nice messages, every part of me lights up!!! u are so kind to me and for what!! i miss talking to u as much as we used to, you are so sweet and you are such a good friend!! i love u n im SO proud of how far youve come with gif making, i still remember when u first started n youve gotten SO amazing at gifs lately!! i love u soso much n im so glad we’re friends, youre so awesome!!!

♡ @basil-the-writer ♡ des!!! i love u so much!!! i know we’ve never rly talked all that much but im glad we have interacted in the ways that we have!! u are so sweet n so talented!! like the fact that u have the patience for those lil video edits u do?? that is so cool!! all ur edits are so cool, i cannot imagine being able to make stuff like that without dying every single time. u are so cool n i love being able to call u my friend!!

♡ GRIFF ♡

(aka griff)

♡ @yawnralphio ♡ u get ur own section bc u are my only 911 friend who isnt an og, but thats ok bc u are so swaggy!! i love being friends with u griff, u are so cool and funny and i am so glad that u still want to be friends with me despite all of the horrifying things u’ve learned about mcyt from me jdhfajkdhfa. i love u so much n i am so excited to get to know u more n get closer to u!!

♡ FRUITBLR ♡

(aka mcyt friends)

♡ @fear-epidemic ♡ atlas u are so swaggy and funny!! tumblr funny man!! im so glad we’re mutuals, i love u a whole lot. that one time u me n wilby played bed wars together was so fun even if we’re really bad! n that one time we played on the fruitblr server while on vc was so fun, i loved talking to u n playing with u so much, we gotta do that again sometime. i love u so much chapin n im so glad we’re friends!!

♡ @netheritedream ♡ hari my beloved... i love u so much. like literally so much that its really embarassing. i am so glad u tagged me in that one follow forever post n put the offer on the table to let me join the server. i love being ur dumb lil husband!!! jus like actual fundy, i would risk it all to watch treasure planet with u. i love u sososo much, i wish i could live closer to u so i could actually talk to u more often </333 im going through severe withdrawal, pray for me. im gonna stop talking for now bc if i kept going on, this post would be several miles along n nobody has time for that </3 just know that i love u so much and i love having matching icons n i love being ur husband, i love u so much

♡ @sootswilbur ♡ tommy... i care you so much. little bromther!!! im sososo glad we’re friends bc u are so kind to me all the time n u are so easy to talk to!! ur also so talented, ur writing n ur gifs are so amazing n im so proud of all the awesome stuff u make!! seeing u experiment more with ur gif sets n trying new things is so awesome n inspiring and i love seeing ur experiments work out!! i love u soso much n im so happy to be ur big brother!! (or one of them at least)

♡ @fruitbur ♡ virgil my Other beloved... i love u so much!! u are one of the kindest people ive ever met n im so glad i met u!! i know ive already told u this before but ur tagging system is so sweet n i love seeing u reblog my posts bc im like “yay alastair is gonna tell me that he loves me in the tags :D” i also lovelovelove ur theme, i love the soft pink and the lil aesthetic board that u have pinned, its so nice to look at!!! ily sososo much <333

♡ @theartofmining ♡ hey fruit ily. like genuinely, u are so unbelievably funny that u make my ribs hurt so much. i know we’re like never rly that serious but i love u so much. as much as i joke about hating u, i really am glad we’re friends n i really look forward to becoming better friends with u. i love u a whole lot rain, i love seeing u on my dash bc ur full of good takes n funny posts

♡ @sapnaplive ♡ dream.... bonks our foreheads together... i care u so much. my other half!!! i love u with my whole little heart. u are soso cool and im so lucky to be able to call u my friend!! ur themes are always so cool, i wish i could be half as cool as them!!! ur art is also so epic like??? u are a triple threat: good at art, tumblr themes, AND minecraft building. and ur also so kind!!! u are one of the sweetest people i know, i love u so much and im so glad im friends with u!!

♡ @dreams-little-kitten ♡ corn u are so weird and i mean that in the kindest way possible. u are so cryptic n i love that so much about u. ur like the wilbur to my philza sometimes and i think thats so awesome. that one time u came into my inbox to talk shit about that one cuphead boss was so funny and absurd, i loved that so much. i love You so much. i love how ur just so effortlessly funny, n im so glad i can be friends with u

♡ @dreamsmp ♡  JEL!!!! i love u so much holy cow. u are so sweet!! all the time!!! ur also so talented, ur gifs always look so good!!! i love being friends with u, ur always so nice to me n u always leave rly nice tags when u reblog my gif sets that make me so happy!!! i think about that one time u rbed my fundy gif set n said “FUNDY GIFS” and “GIFS BY FUNDY” it made me so happy!!! i love u a whole lot, im so glad we’re friends :)

♡ @leaguelol ♡ damien!! i love u so much u funky little cryptid!! i love when u pop into the gc just to share cryptic thoughts, u are so strange but i think thats so cool of u!!! i honestly see u kinda like a lil sibling, im always so proud of u when i see ur art on my dash!! u are so talented at art!! i love u so much n i love being ur friend, ur rly sweet n i love seeing u on my dash and in the gc!!

♡ @its5undy ♡ idk why im putting u on this, ur my mortal enemy. jkjk, i actually love u a lot clay! i love joking around with u, ur so funny and for what. im so glad u joined the gc bc i love talking to you so much!! i still love that one time u reblogged that fwt gif set n tagged me in it moments after I reblogged it. i love that u thought about me, that rly warms my heart! i love being friends with u sososo much

♡ @cavalreee ♡ oh hey, another great big fruit!! i dont think we talk all that often, which is a shame, bc ur so sweet!! and also so fucking funny, why is everyone in this friend group so fucking funny, its not fair. i love seeing u on my dash talking with ur other friends, u always have the funniest convos ever. also? ur desktop theme is SO epic, it threw me off the first time i saw it but its so swaggy, just like u!! i love u soso much azzie, n i hope we can talk more in the future bc ur so cool

♡ @technosoot ♡ i love u even tho ur a br*t /j /j /j. jannat u are so unbelievably sweet. im so glad u joined the gc bc u are such a kind presence both in there and on my dash! u radiate very Warm, Friend energy. ur friend shaped. i love u so much n i love being friends with u!! im very eager to become closer friends with u bc u seem like a really amazing friend to have

♡ @sortasortaspicy ♡ les where are u in the gc i miss u </3 i love u so much, u fit in so well from the very beginning n brought so much more fun and laughter into the gc. i dont know u all that well n i dont think we’ve talked one on one like. at all. but id love to get closer to u bc ur so rad and ur so sweet!!

♡ EPIC PEOPLE  ♡

(aka mutuals who are so cool n id love to be friends with u pls talk to me)

@eurytherm ♡ @vampkings ♡ @weelbur ♡ @wilburtheesoot ♡ @quackityskarl ♡ @wimblrscoot ♡ @technofarmer ♡ @wooteena ♡ @bloodforblood ♡ @smpsapnap ♡ @literallynotfound ♡ @hearty-an0n ♡ @enderanboo ♡ @springbonniecpu ♡ @pandascanpvp ♡ @tommylnnits ♡ @strawberrygogy ♡ @timedeo ♡ @nymika-arts ♡ @h-isforhome ♡ @eboykarl ♡ @joe-alkaysani ♡ @betwecouldmakesome ♡ @squirrelstone ♡ @maddieandchimney

[asuka--langley--soryu]

hey do you know any blogs/sites etc that „explain” nge episode by episode? not the plot but rather the symbolism and themes

oh man anon I dearly wish I could say yes but unfortunately if something like this exists then I don’t know about it :/ instead what I can offer are some links to some meta/analysis/essays and hopefully that might help or at least give you a place to start? 

so there is always the evageeks wiki which can provide a basic amount of info on some thematic elements, and at the very least is reasonably good for lore explanations. I feel kind of eyeroll about evageeks and their general community perspective, but if you need a good jumping off point i think this might be useful for that. 

when i first started this blog there was a user called ritsumaya who put out some realllyyy interesting and in-depth meta. they deleted a while ago unfortunately but i believe most of their stuff as been archived at @ritsumaya2. None of the posts are tagged or organized in any way so it’s a little hard to navigate but worth perusing/searching through imo.

Someone did reupload their analysis of asuka specifically in a slightly more readable format so I’ll link that here separately. I 100% rec checking it out, it has some really really good thoughts on her character and informed a lot of my own interpretations back in the day. I do think they go a little too into the pathologizing angle which (if it wasn’t clear from my last post lol) I don’t agree with and largely ignore, but, aside from that, I think it’s super interesting. 

in terms of other blogs, off the top of my head qmisato and adamworu put out good meta p often and also have organized tagging systems, so you might want to look at their stuff. i’m gonna glance through my archive and tag some of the meta ive rb-ed in the past, and will try to consistently tag it from now on so as to have somewhere to reference in the future. Plus I probably should have been doing that already but im like yknow a big carnival idiot and consistently cannot keep organized no matter how potentially beneficial it would be for me :) 

There are some papers on nge in my thesis sources drive, so if youre looking for something a lil more academic/theory based then you could check those out. Specifically I recommend the Ortega and Napier essays.  Link for that’s here. 

theres def other blogs on here im forgetting, as well as just other sources in general. pls feel free to drop recs in the replies if you have em!! this was just the stuff i could pull from the top of my head/knew where to find so its by no means comprehensive and i am by no means the like end all be all in nge meta archiving. also, as usual, i’m not sanctioning 100% of every word written in the things I rec, so dont hold me to their opinions. 

i hope this helps at least a little bit! 

(ps: ik reddit has analysis threads or whatever but i’ve never read anything on there id recommend so ymmv on that front ) 

(pps: also ive never watched any of those youtube video essays or whatever about nge and never will [im just like instinctively repelled by anime youtubers that arent miss watchmojo dot com top 10 list lady] so i have literally no idea about their quality on any level. ik they exists and maybe could be helpful to you if you prefer a non-written resource?) 

[justarcadefire]

When you are younger time slips away too slowly. But as when you get older, it feels like the clock starts ticking way faster than before. When Everything Now came out I had this arrogant feeling of having everything under control, everything back then made sense: I was in a relationship, living by my own, with this freedom to do whatever I want, whenever I wanted… Or at least it felt like that. (Stop pretending you got EN… I should have listen)

As 2017 came to an end, I lived through this catharsis: I attended to my second and third Arcade Fire concert, and one week later my 6 year relationship ended. 2018, I had to come back to my parents place and face one of the most depressive/pathetic years of my life. I made terrible choices, I was drunk like every weekend and one time I almost got killed by three thiefs whom putted a gun to my head, How the hell I am still alive? I don't know.

2019 wasn't different at all, I had this urge to feel loved again and despite having 'friends' I think I've never feel more alone like those days. Back in 2014 when I had my first panick attack, I was diagnosed with anxiety and OCD. Since then I managed to live with it, with ups and downs, struggling to find a way to enjoy most of the things I used to love. I never accomplished at all, but I tried my best. So, the pandemic hitted and we all know what we went through those horrible times. As a result my mental health went downhill even worse than before.

Why am I writting this? Im not sure at all, besides I don't even know if there's still someone around here who's gonna read this. But as WE day is here, I felt this urge to put my feelings and thoughts in here, just like the old times.

These 5 years have left deep scars into my heart, soul and mind. I still have this horrible need to feel/be loved/loveable, most of the time I have no idea of what am I doing with my life felling like I'm wasting my precious time around here, I'm still struggling with anxiety, insecurities and yes, I still feel lonely/lost as fuck. Somedays are better than others, often the best I can do is to cry until I fall asleep and wait for a better day to start. But I'm still going, I'm still trying…

I'm not sure If I am a better person than my younger self in 2017, but now I'm surely do know certain things about me, about what I want and I don't in my life, about the things I'm looking for and the things I hope to find one day, once again.

Here's what I've learned so far: Don't take anything or someone for granted ever, not even yourself. Because you are gonna change, always. That's the only constant in life. Time moves only forward. Don't expect anyone to save you from your shit, or to face the consequences of what you have made… that's up to you, no one else. Besides, nobody deserves to pay for something they didn't have to do with it at all.

That little voice inside your head telling you that you are not good enough, or you are a mistake? Guess what? WE are enough, WE are not a mistake, WE are just lost and afraid. WHO ISN'T? Remember: WE only have ourselves, WE are our strongest shelter, WE are the only ones capable of defeating our monsters, WE must embrace our shadows and make amends with them in order to keep going, that's the only way WE could get through this without going insane. Take a deep breath: WE will be okay. No one is perfect, read that again: No one.

More than a random text, this feels like a letter to my younger self (or future(?)). Oh man, If that poor guy would've know what he was approaching to, he will probably shitted his pants before freaked out and losed his mind.

Wherever/Whoever you are, yes, you; I just want to tell you how immensely proud I am of you. No matter how bad the weather looks, keep going, don't give up because it's just a matter of time till WE meet again.

Happy WE day everyone.

Ps. Sorry for not being up to date with the blog and everything, as you can imagine I'm not been doing well but as the new era is here I'm going to try my best to keep you updated. Thx for reading me and your support over the years. <3

[yamagucji]

love letters from cupid.

dear lovely anons,

i cherish every bit of interaction we have. im extremely grateful to know that there are people out there who read and enjoy my works. hm, hope you know that i care about each of you. honestly sometimes i just wanna make a post dedicated to each of you but idk!! if you’ll see it or not. hopefully this bit is enough to let you know how much i appreciate every single one of you. thank you.

dear readers,

thank you for reading my works. it’s comforting to know that there are people out there who will check out something that i’ve slapped on together with every bit of my effort. to those of you who have consistently supported my works in silence- you know who you are. im just... keeping my distance because ya’ll are really just minding your own business while i get giddy about seeing you pop up in my notifications again. im hoping to get around and send a ty note to as many special readers n special ppl on this blog. but im a little shy, so i hope you’ll give me some time. seeing you in my notifications from time to time makes me happy; sometimes i do wonder if you’re still here and in good health. i hope you all are right now. thank you.

dear dani,

what a wonderful being you are. never regretting the first time i *shyly* asked if there was anyone that wanted to be friends here. i probably already talk about my love for you and vera so much but who’s gonna stop me? you’re such a cool person. i look up to you (literally). i think it’s amazing to get to know a person who has a lot of passion for history like me. but also- screams about 2d men with me. truthfully, this site is much more bearable having you as a moot. i feel very comfortable talking to you, about anything at all. lomve you, you’re the best.

dear mayya,

kindness personified. im sure you’ve made a plethora of people smile with every rb and comment you’ve given; including me. i think it’s very refreshing to see such genuine comments. you radiate this calm aura that im always seeking for. thank you, for providing me (and many other people) with that. a little embarrassing that you see my uhm, messy sideblog, but... it’s comforting i think. to know that someone is listening. i hope that you understand it goes the other way around too— that i’m here for you.

dear hrituja,

my partner of chaos. when did it start? i can’t remember. all i know is that every little thing you send me on instagram really makes my day. i’ll have bad days and all i need to do is look at the silly stuff you sent me and get a laugh out of it. i think it’s cool that we’ve been able to build this space where we can talk about anything (literally), poke fun of each other, and also ourselves. you’re cool. i genuinely like hearing you go off about ace. if i could meet a moot it’d probably be you unless you’re secretly a fraud and you’re actually just a 80 yr old man looking for a sugar babie. in that case im in.

dear oz,

you overly sweet bean. i genuinely watch you in awe from afar, just by how talented and hardworking you are. your art is amazing, and i always look forward to the design you make for your oc’s outfits. thank you for understanding me, and for being patient with me. i care about you a lot, so if there’s ever anything that’s occupying your mind and you need to let them out, i’m here to listen. ps. i really don’t know any other mutual who listens to *that* comfort stuff like i do so im really thankful to have someone to talk about them with. you can always share your interests with me too, especially with your dearest tendou.

dear tate,

im such in awe of you. just the fact that you devote a lot of your time into writing and setting up the theme for your blog astounds me. not to mention, your art skills as well. i am still very much in love with that bokuto piece you made with the hanging leaves. i hope you know that bokuto loves you just as much as you do to him. i know you’re writing up something special atm, so i’m really looking forward to it. thank you for all the time you’ve spared just to send me an ask. it truly does mean a lot to me. it feels like someone is listening, and i’m very appreciative of having you as my dear mutual. please know that i’m here to support you too, with the best of my abilities.

dear winx club,

[ @wissbby @kageruna @pinkbunnyplushie @astrooliver @lovingtobio @kenmaki @lfjr @lcsbianist ]

im such a clutz, but thank you for dealing with me. i was little nervous to start up such a discord server because im bad at staying in one. though, the warm environment that you all provide makes me feel much more at ease. i think it’s funny popping in to the server and seeing a few people spamming the chat with hugs, headpats and kisses. it’s sweet, too. being in a group discord can get overwhelming for some people, so i appreciate you all for having that patience. another thing- thank you for understanding each other’s boundaries. its hard to be aware all the time especially when you’re interacting with people you don’t know to at a very personal level. im glad that you all helped each other make the space comfy. i look forward to more chaotic and genuine talks with all of you in the future. maybe we’ll still be in touch with each other after a long while? who knows. but im going to cherish every single moment i get with you all.

dear @nishinoya-is-baby @keitsukki11 @sullen-angel24 @smolbludandelions @whootwhoot @cheatingthroughthislife @tadashi-simp @oikaw-ugh @lostsealscreams @sleepykarabou @atsunflower @lfjr @globe-fish @bewwybun @tetsoleil @sleepykarabou @justcafewriter @rin-suna @atsumusc0ck @waitforitillwritemywayout @dorkyhaikyu @yemilnisu @sunseteyes @kenmaki @kenanami,

goodness, i would write you all individual messages if time let me. but, i hope this is alright. i just wanted to thank you all for interacting with some dummy like me because that shit takes real patience </3 y’all are some really cool people and im really glad to have you as a moot. im ngl im pretty sure i’ve stopped by all your inboxes just to forget to actually send an ask :’( or maybe im too shy. one or the other. hopefully i can come around to all your ask boxes soon and fill it with my love because it’s what you all deserve. ya’ll are such amazing and talented people. for the love of god- you have all my love and care in the world. i hope that these past few weeks have been gentle with you, but if not, please let yourself rest from whatever it is that may be putting you down. here’s a gentle reminder that im always here to listen, and i wouldn’t judge you for whatever it is it may be. thank you for being so kind to me, and i hope to return that as well. take care.

@insanitywrites @derpeedoo @killuababie @lespaghetti @ordinary-ace

i haven’t told you this until now but, thank you for giving me company and comfort during a time that i was deeply struggling.

ps. if there’s any grammar or spelling mistakes no u did not see that <3

[x-lulu]

hii y’all, so I wanted to say thank you to some people and wish them a lovely new year. we of course have to deal with time zones and different religions that have influence on when the new year starts, so i’m just gonna post it now.

I love you all, to some I talk every day, to some just a few asks so now and then and others presence I just enjoy on my dash, nonetheless I love all of you and I’m grateful you put up with my shit haha x

I also wanted to say a quick thank you to all the lovely anons, your asks make my day and I’m honoured that you take time to send me some :) so thank you and I hope y’all have a lovely 2021!! ofcourse I wish everyone a happy new year as well, all my followers, everyone on this site, no matter who you are have a wonderful 2021 and may you get all the love and happiness you deserve x

@rafej-cambanks​

dani, my older and wiser sister! I love you, I haven’t been texting you as much as i used to sorry, i think we’re both quite busy. anyway this doesnt make me love you any less, i love you lots bby! you were one of the first people that welcomed me, supported me and cared about me, most important of all, you were the first that gave me the feeling i wasn’t completely worthless and that you did that means so much! you are such a talented person and your writing is incredible!! but the most amazing thing about you is how lovely of a person you are. you care so much and you’re there for everyone, you defend your friends and anyone who needs defending. you always know how to cheer me up with pics of your lovely princess, chels is just absolutely gorgeous!!! I think you’re a wonderful friend, someone who you can laugh and cry with, thank you, im grateful i’ve met you this year and i hope that there are a lot of conversations to come. have a lovely new year babe

@deionswannabegirl​ 

bubba, bella, how gorgeous are you ma’am????? i dont think it’s fair for the rest of us!!! i dont know where to start, you honestly mean so much to me. which may suprise you because we havent talked that many times, but i loved every single conversation we’ve had. you really helped me become the person i am, you helped me feel comfortable with my sexuality and gave me the confidence to come out to my parents, ill forever be grateful. but apart from how much you helped me, i think you are such a lovely woman, who sadly had too many things thrown at her by life. Im so sorry you’re having these hard times and i wish i could take those away from you. you are one of the most beautiful persons i’ve ever met, inside and outside!! you’re funny, you’re caring, you’re intelligent, you’re talented, you’re loving, you’re amazing bella and im honoured to have my cuddle bear be named after you hahah. I love you bub and i know it can be hard to talk to people or ask for help or just a distraction, because sometimes we dont need help or dont know what to talk about, i just want to let you know that i will always be here and i promise you can talk about anything with me, you are so strong love and i believe you will get through this and that you are gonna make beautiful memories, i love you! may 2021 be a year to make wonderful memories and may you get the love you deserve and you deserve lots of it <3

@aquariusholland​

kyr! hi! i love you and every time i see you on my dash i get a smile on my face. you really have your own sense of humour and randomness, both which i adore. your jokes make me laugh in public and people are like wtf she laughing about haha. i relate to a lot of things you post haha and while we might not talk that much, i feel close to you. you kind of feel like a sister to me haha. you’re also a queen and come up for yourself and your believes, but also in a respectful way and i just admire that about you. I hope you have a wonderful new year and that it exists of a lot more of your random asks ;)

ps. can i call you kyr bear? idk i was thinking about you and my mind went to kyr bear hahah

@https-luna

lunaaaa bby! we both thought the other didn’t like them haha, but gosh i love you 👉👈 we haven’t been talking for that long yet i think two weeks maybe? idk but you’re already really important to me! i wish i could do more for you than just listen and maybe give some advice, but sadly i cant hold you in my arms and protect you from the world. i will however always do my best and ill be here for you no matter what. you deserve the world my love and things will get better and im here along the way and so are lots of other people, you really are loved bubba!!! i also started watching hannah montanna since you mentioned you loved that show ;) and finally someone with the same love for the little mermaid hahah. I hope that in 2021 we can get even closer, but i think we’re going down the right path <3 i love you and wish you a wonderful new year with lots of love, healing and health, because you deserve it so much! you’re also so strong and i fully believe that you will get there x

@sortagaysortahigh

hey love, we don’t really talk but i wanted to add you to the list. i really admire you!! you stand up for what you believe in, you educate so many people and do what’s right in this world!! you love your friends and i believe you’d anything for them!! you’re also hella funny and seeing you in my dash can make my day. i just wanted to tell you that you’re a wonderful human being and you make the world a lot better!! i hope you keep being the amazing person you are and i wish you all the love and happiness in the world!! also you’re a badass haha, happy new year angel 🖤

@annab-nana

anna bby, you’re the sweetest person i’ve ever met!! i love interacting with you so much, you always bring a smile to my face and i believe you do that to a lot of people. you’re an incredible presence on tumblr and in the world, i believe you make everyone’s life a bit brighter and i hope i can do the same for you. on top of that you’re also hella talented, idk what god thought when he made you ;) I love that we have gotten closer in the past few weeks, i cant believe that i hadn’t made the connection between you and your sideblog hahah, but now i know you and im grateful for it!!! you’re a loving, caring and supporting lil bean and i love you! i feel like i can come with anything to you and you’ll be there for me and that is an amazing feeling, so here just a reminder that you can also come with anything to me <3 i hope 2021 is gonna be a good year for you, you deserve it!! 

ps - you’re absolutely gorgeous

@mxltifandoms06

hi sweetheart!! when i think of christmas i think of you ;) (i wrote this when it was almost christmas not new year haha) you’re such a cozy and sweet human being!! you’re supportive, caring and loving!! you always make my days better and i’m so grateful to have met you!! also your dog is just the most adorable ever!! im so glad you decided to come in my ask box and start interacting, i love you babe, i hope all the love you give you’ll receive in 2021, you’re deserving of a lot of love <3

@killingbxys

my queen! hi! we don’t talk as much as I would want to, but gosh i just have a comfortabel vibe with you, i feel like i can come with anything to you and every time i see you on my dash, asks, dm anything it brings a smile on my face. i’ve said it before, but you’re that one friend who you can both laugh and cry with. i feel like you’re this amazing presence here on tumblr and everyone is grateful to have you x i love you babe and i hope we will get closer in the new year :) if you’re up for that as well ofcourse hahah, im not going to force you to be friends with me (well... maybe i am... but we’re not gonna talk about that...). I wish you the best and i hope 2021 will treat you wonderful x

@jellyfishbeansontoast

izzy hi!! babe i love you and all your randomness, every time i see you in my dash i get a smile on my face!! also your work is incredible!!! and i love seeing you simping haha!! your whole blog is basically a mood and i love it 🥰 thank you for being your lovely self!! i hope you’ll get the love and happiness you deserve and i also hope to get closer in 2021 hehe ;) you’re just this amazing person and im honoured to be moots! have a lovely new year x

@demxters

elle my love, if we’re gonna talk about lovey and talented people ofcourse we have to add you to the list. you’re one of my favourite writers of all time, your titles, your aesthetic, your concepts, your way with words, it’s all so perfect!!! you always amaze me and then we started talking and omg you’re such a sweet person and every time i get an ask or a message from you it puts a smile on my face. i’m grateful i met you this year and i wish you all the best, i believe in you, you’re so strong!! i know you go through some difficult stuff, but i will always be there for you, remember you are worthy and so loved!!! i love you, have a wonderful 2021.

@pink-meringues

pink gosh im gonna miss you so bad, but i’m also really proud of you for doing what’s best for you and i really hope it will have positive effect on your well being and your happiness!! you’re such a loving and welcoming person!! thank you for being who you are and making so many peoples lives better, we all care about you babe!! have a lovely 2021 <3

@sunsetholland

hey love, if i’m gonna be honest here, you were the person who gave me the confidence to start being myself on this site, you probably don’t remember but once you send me an ask and wished me a lovely week, which brought a smile to my face!! that was the moment that i decided to be myself, thank you for that!! apart from that you are so freaking talented, i say it all the time but your work is like reading poetry, how you come up with your sentences i have no clue, but it’s wonderful and i’m amazed every time!! you’re also a lovely human being and your posts on my dash always make me smile!! i hope you have a lovely 2021 babe, i love you <3

@skiesofthesketchy

sky my love, you’re such a loving and supporting human being. you really bring peace on my dash and give me a calm feeling!! I honestly still can’t believe that my tumblr crush knew who I was and wanted to talk to me haha. I’m obsessed with your work and there are so many people who admire you, which you totally deserve!!! It’s almost unbelievable how talented you are haha and your music taste is also on point!! and how cool is it that you can play the guitar and have a job to do with music, I love it and you’re so talented and well deserving of every good thing that comes on your path. have a lovely new year x

@cognacdelights

hi bub, you’re one of my role models 🙈 you’re a classy badass who I admire so much, you’re one of the most talented persons I’ve ever met! you’re also so lovely and sweet!!! and you’re a really fascinating and interesting woman as well!! I wish you all the best my love, remember to take some time for yourself and try to ignore those toxic people, you’re more than enough and deserve to feel happy and loved

@mind-with-a-melody

tess, i know you haven’t had the best time lately and i wish 2021 could be a whole new start for you, sadly mental health doesn’t work that way. however i really hope it will be better for you and you’ll learn to have hope and maybe love yourself, because you are so worth it. you are beautiful on the inside and on the outside. you send love to people and make others peoples days better and that is the most wonderful trait someone can have, i believe in you, you are strong and even tho it may not feel like that but it will get better and i’m always here!! you’ll get help along the way, from me but also from so many other people who love you!! i hope 2021 will treat you better, you deserve all the love and the happiness ma’am, happy new year!!

@all-alone-he-turns-to-stone

hi audrey, we haven’t talked that much yet, but you’re the first blog i followed on here. you’re so talented and seeing you on my dash always brings a smile to my face. so i decided to send you an ask and then i found out that you’re a lovely human as well!! i wish you the best for 2021, you deserve all the happiness and love in the world!!

@nxsmss​ 

well lara, where do I start, last but definitely not least. I just had to put you last because I knew your message would be one of the longest haha. it feels so weird for someone to accept me completely as who i am, but you do exactly that! okay now im starting to cry again, but you mean so much to me. you’re the best that happened to me in a long long time and you’re honestly the person who helps me the most, gives me the best feelings, it’s incredible how much talking to you can cheer me up and when i think about you i start to smile (and sometimes cry hahah, jeez i come over like a cry bby, i promise im not hahaha). you’re one of the most loving and caring persons i’ve ever met. you were so welcoming since the first time we met and i feel like we kinda immediatelly hit it off. we didnt have that ‘how are you and where do you live’ kind of conversations, while there is nothing wrong with small talk, i feel like we pretty much immediatly started being our weird selves around each other and i love it. we have like three dates every week haha and those are honestly what gets me through the week. and we basically interact almost every hour, no matter if it’s trough text, snap, tumblr or tiktok hahah. ive never felt more myself, more loved or more capable than with you. on top of that you are hella talented, wise, intelligent, gorgeous, pretty much perfect ;) i absolutely love everything about you, from the clumsy stuff you do to the sweet good morning and good night messages, from the random snaps to the deep conversations, from the weird asks to just basically acting like we’re a couple hehe. i just love everything and i cant imagine my life without you, im never letting you go babe. 

@dmonchld @jiaraendgame @vintageobx @rafeyybabyy @camillemonty, @amorejjaygron​ 

we may not interact that much but every time I see you on my dash or asks or something it brings a smile to my face!! 

also @dmonchld you are my icon 🙈 and i admire you so much, im just a scared lil bean which stops me from interacting with you hahah, but you’re so strong and brave. i think you are a wonderful friend and just an incredible person in general

@jiaraendgame your music taste is just on point!! and im so grateful for you, when ive posted about tough subjects you comment and even when we didnt know each other you supported me and comforted me, thank you, i think you are this amazing person and i love every interaction with you

@vintageobx and @rafeyybabyy you guys were some of the first people I started talking to and you’ve always been supportive thank you for that!! you’re both really kind and i hope 2021 will treat you with nothing but love 

@camillemonty and @amorejjaygron you both make me feel welcome on this site and I’m really grateful for that!

i wish you all a wonderful new year and may it be filled with love, laughter and making wonderful memories 

i love you 

btw i started writing this like a month ago, because i never work on the stuff that i need to work on and knew i wouldn’t be able to finish it if i didn’t start already haha, so yeah, with some people the relationships might have changed a bit, like we’ve already become closer, but i think it’s all pretty up to date, but if it isn’t then you know that that’s why <3 and there are probably a lot of errors because it’s barely proofread and i’m a horrible at typing so that’s that 🙈

[guccifloralsuits]

girl.........when u gonna rec some cm fics??? help a sis out!!

These are all Moreid, Hotchreid or no main pairing so heads up lol. I don’t read self-insert. I’ll try to tag the tumblr author’s blogs i know but i’ll prob miss a few (srry) 

GENERAL WARNING: please read the tags & ratings bc some of these have multiple TWs. I’ll try to tag here but also CM has some...uh. dark content. Graphic depictions of violence & ya know, murder. So be safe & take care of yourself.

Completed Works/One-Shots:

You Reap What You Sow by BloodiedRose // One-Shot // 6k // Elle & Spencer friendship, morcia side-pairing // took me a sec to get into but holy FUCK

Elle Greenaway suddenly transfers to the D.C. department. She tries to keep her head down, but that's hard to do when she has to get used to a new city, adopts her traumatised coworker, and is being haunted by her own personal Graveling.

A Dead Like Me au (but no knowledge of the show is required).

The Ghosts That Should-Have-Been by Kibbers // Completed // 17k // Hotchreid // TW: Suicide Attempt // The writing on this is insane. Kinda abstract but in a way which just works. I actually cried reading this

Hotch said, “You’re keeping score, just like Owen.”

If Spencer had been keeping score, the world was winning. The rolled eyes, the disinterested gazes, the way they spoke to him only when they wanted something. Only when they wanted notebooks read at an inhuman rate or statistics they could use for the profile, for a bet, for the delight of having them at all. If Reid was keeping score, he had the right to do so if only to prove to himself that he deserved to feel a little hurt. He deserved to step in front of a bullet to save a kid that felt the same way he did.

an ice white candle, lit by Lilaciliraya // One-shot // 2.5k // Moreid // TW: implied childhood sexual abuse

He fails his gun qualification because the administrator is male this time and he stands just a little too close. He hates that he is 23 years old and he cannot stop the way his hands shake in the presence of an unlikely possibility.

(or) The hardest thing that Spencer Reid has ever had to do is learn how to stay warm.

Visiting Hours by Word_Clay // one-shot // 5k // no main pairing // TW: threats of rape, dissociation, homicidal ideation // prison-arc, so well written

Getting more and more intense. Got to fall deeper in to beat them. I’ve lost friends before, but not like this; not in a box where I have no control—or do I?Starting to think like them; starting to survive like them. I’m here because I made a choice.What if that means I don’t get out alive?

Indispensable by Deejaymil // Completed // 40k // Hotchreid // this fic wrecked me lol it’s fine im fine

Dave's a damn good guardian angel, one of the best. And being one of the best means he gets the worst jobs: the important, the clumsy, the reckless, the difficult-to-keep-alive. The indispensables. But he's never before quite had anyone like Spencer Reid.

Within the first two seconds of meeting his new charge, the kid gets hit by a car; it really only goes downhill from there. His only consolation is that Emily is having just as much trouble with her new charge, Aaron Hotchner.

If only they could somehow combine their assignments...

He’s All That by rchr // One-shot // no pairing // 6k // criminally underrated i’ve read it like 70 times // bonus for Morgan’s POV // Garcia being a queen

"One does not simply make over the good Dr. Reid. A true makeover is all about sowing the seeds."

Sunflowers and Daisies by Agib, starsandsupernovae // @ag-ib & @rxsienbloom  // Completed // 12.5k // Moreid // Penelope being a queen (again) // I’m always a bitch for a Hanahaki Disease AU and this one especially

Derek is, without question, unfailingly in love with Doctor Spencer Reid.

Blueberry Syrup by dilaudiddreams // @m0rcia // One-shot // 1.5k // Moreid // Fluffy af actually all comfort & barely any hurt //

"Listen, uh...do you think I could maybe...take you out...sometime?”

Spencer frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Snipe you. No. What do you think? To dinner or something.”

Spencer wakes up in Derek Morgan's bed. He tries to sneak out without waking him.

He fails, and he winds up staying for breakfast out of common courtesy (and maybe something else).

Set season 1. Tooth-rotting sweet.

Following a Bright Shiny Thing by travelinthedark // Hotchreid but genuinely the whole team’s dynamic is what shines in this // One-shot // 5k // yes it has a lot of kudos // yes it deserves all of them

Wherein Reid feels like 6th grade girl, the girls squeel from time to time, and there are little blue drinks. 

WIPS I’m Keeping Up With: 

Dreams are Only Blue by themetaphorgirl // @themetaphorgirl​ // Alex Blake & Spencer Reid // last update: first week of October // TW: child neglect

AU. Nine-year-old Spencer Reid is brilliant, but he's too young to fully grasp the trauma threatening to bury him. Alex Blake buried her nine-year-old son and accepted that she just wasn't meant to be a mother. The BAU team takes on a case that ends up throwing them together, and Spencer is sent to live with Alex and her husband, and everything changes.

(this is the Spencer Blake AU)

Where Have You Bean All My Life? By agib // @ag-ib // Moreid // last update: the end of September

It's rare enough that anyone on the team has to take on undercover work for more than a single night, and even more uncommon that the CIA happens to be splitting a case with the FBI.

So, really, Morgan shouldn't complain. But he does, and he's wholeheartedly dedicated to hating this assignment up until the damn college kid, who looks like he survives on coffee alone, bustles into the café.

Full Series I Rec:

Undercover Pretty Boy by 898700 (ghostwriter) // Completed // Moreid leaning? // Undercover CIA model AU which inspired the whump moreid 5k I have written & will maybe one of these days post (rippppppp) 

Ag-ib’s Whumptober // Ongoing // general TW bc dark themes for Whumptober

Appalachian’s Whumptober // @appalachianapologies​ // Ongoing // general TW bc dark themes for Whumptober

Happy reading!

ps: I actually wrote a moreid (Ex-CIA undercover model!Reid) one shot too if that’s something you’d be interested in!!

[zhilan]

Follow up to your last answer !

When did the writers said she was here to stay ? Was that before her character for negative reviews ? Because I also feel like Abigael is actually very 50/50. Some people love her, some people don’t. But I also don’t think most people dislike her at all, I feel like she’s the kind of character that brings a strong reaction one way or another ?

Im just worried because as you said last episode gives hope (as well as the season 2 finale (the one in season 3) because I feel like they set up duo thing and if they really didn’t want abimel they could have changed Aby’s role / dialogue / behaviour during that episode ? I’m just a bit worried because as said, the pushback but also because of Melby ? Like this episode obviously hinted at Abimel but also reinforced Melby. So do you think it’s gonna happen this season ? Like abigael and Mel spending more time together and realising that they do care ? Or that Ruby is gonna realise and break up with Mel ? What’s your pronostic ?

Ps : really like your account !

it was some time recently, but i can’t remember when exactly. definitely within whenever this season started though. 

yeah, i agree she’s 50/50. you love her or you hate her. idk i guess i just see a lot of hate that’s why i feel a lot of people dislike her. but that’s twitter, a bit on tumblr. most people on instagram love her. so yeah it’s probably balanced.

i guess my thing about melby is that bethany brown, the actor who plays her, isn’t a regular. and it feels unfair to me, for both macy and maggie’s love interests / endgames to be series regulars that we get to see all the time, and then leave mel’s out like that. especially when you consider mel’s the lgbtq character here. that’s kinda cringe-y. mel and ruby’s relationship, while i do enjoy them and they have mad chemistry, i feel is very underdeveloped, inconsistently written, not to mention 95% of it happens offscreen. (i get so mad about it lmao) that feels like an extremely unfair way to treat a main ship. especially when you compare it to the ~het ship on the show which gets something every single episode. so i wanna believe that abigael is there, and that all the cute little crumbs we’re getting is them giving wlw fans the build up, the time, the effort, the growth, the attention that a wlw ship deserves as much as any het ship. 

i do think there’s also a chance they’ll push through with melby though, but i go back and forth because it feels like very little effort to the point that they barely even bother. we still don’t actually know what happened with regards to ruby not wanting to be part of the magical world. we can assume she changed her mind, but it feels strange to have missed such a pivotal moment in their relationship and technically still not know how they worked that out. so it’s just a lot of filling the blanks and that makes me question whether it’s meant to last. if it is, i feel like we should be getting more and ruby shouldn’t feel like just a love interest, rather a character on her own (which harry, jordan and abigael all are). but because atm a love interest is ALL that she is, it makes me feel like it’s temporary. and if she’s meant to play such a large role, why didn’t they hire her to be a regular this season? 

as for when abimel might happen, i think with covid and social distancing and the charmed ones “allergy”... the earliest i’d imagine would probably by the end of the season.

nawww, my blog is mostly nonsense x.x but thank you! 💖