#rawposting

[maniacpixiedreamgirl]

[codypunk]

YURI WON TODAY

[egotistic-artist]

Addiction (tw suggestive, gore)

reblogs > likes closeups under the cut

[shewhosleepsalotincemeteries]

[butteredshrimps]

Shrimpsposting

Hi there. I'm Shrimps. 🦐

I'm a farm kid and my interests reflect that. I like animals, home-growing food and plants, and making things with my hands. I love to cook and craft, and I think this world is a beautiful one which we should work to preserve in any way we can.

This is a nonspecific blog. I plan on using it to document crafts I do, recipes I make, some notable moments in my life, etc.

-🦐🌿

Important Tags

My posts will be tagged as shrimpsposting, and my reblogs will be tagged as shrimpsblogging. All queued posts will be tagged as queued, otherwise I'm rawposting in the here and now. I'll probably mostly queue stuff though.

Any recipes or other cooking-related posts will be tagged as shrimpscooking. Yes, a shrimp DID fry this rice. I plan on brewing my own drinks and would like to document the recipes of what I try, along with how that works out. Posts specifically about alcohol will also be tagged with homebrewing, for those who want to mute that.

-🦐🌿

Other Tags

Posts related to shrimp, because I like them, will be tagged as shrimps is bugs.

General fishkeeping posts will be tagged as aquarium.

Sewing and similar crafts, such as quilting, will be tagged with stitchcraft, along with the specific medium in question. Crafts such as crochet will also be grouped under this tag.

Any other tags I think of will be added later.

-🦐🌿

That's all, I think. Have a groovy day.

[willow-black]

Dad told me you wanted to talk to me.

And I realized that I was afraid of you.

I’m terrified of you, I’m scared for you.

You’ve become this walking personification of my anxiety.

You are a part of what keeps me up at night.

I stare outside from behind my curled up blinds.

My head on my pillow but my head empty of person. 

I lay at night and your grey eyes shine back at me.

From the streetlight.

The howls of winds from my allies have been home.

They’ve been home for you.

While I lay my head and feel the warm, sweaty safety.

Your face burns deep into the back of my skull.

They will find you living there, taking up the space.

In fetal position, to keep yourself warm.

Deep down, my mind spoke truths through a dream I shared with you.

Remember? Remember?

I told you that you’d drift away, remember?

I told you I couldn’t find you here any longer.

I’m afraid of you because I worry that you’ll know that I’ve known all along that you’ve been gone.

By: Willow-Black

[myscrapperblog]

Relationships are terrifying

...Of all sorts. It’s not just the romantic relationships that cripple my heart into a paper ball. If anything, I can handle those. Relationships with those people who are supposedly going to care for us no matter what we do. It feels like a stretch even writing that. However, that’s what unconditional love is, right?

We are told that we are loved. We are told by our friends, family, and complete strangers who think that they know us, that we are loved. Loved for our appearance, humour, listening skills, drinking skills, driving abilities, the money in our wallet. You get where I’m going with this. What if everything we had fell away, and all we were left with was literally just who we are. Who would love us?  Who would YOU love? If all they had to offer you was all that they are, all that they have endured in this life, and the environment and experiences that shaped them. 

I’ve lost so many people that claimed they loved me. I know the depths of heartbreak that I truly don’t think any person should feel. 

Our parents. Inherently, from birth, we are hard wired to trust them. We know they will love us no matter what we do and we will love them just the same. Unfortunately, this hasn’t been my story. 

I watched my mother battle bipolar disorder, ultimately until the end of our relationship. High swings of mania, and the lowest swings of depression. Ultimately, I couldn’t do it anymore. Removing myself from my mother has been the top 2 most painful things I have experienced to this day. I feel as though I grieve her death every single day. Knowing she is out there in the world, alive, unwell, and unable to help herself, but not speaking to her or feeling her embrace. 

My father was no better, but the story with him and I scares me to share. Any time I share micro-truths about him, somehow it finds its way to him, and backfires onto me. I am so scared of him. I don’t understand how I can fear someone this much, but miss their presence equally. I guess that truly is unconditional love. 

It was easy for him to let me go, I think. The last I spoke to my father was around August 2020. I called him while having a severe anxiety attack. I was afraid, and although I hadn’t spoke to him in ages, without thinking, I dialed him. In my frantic and illogical state, I said “please, I will do anything, counseling, I just need you right now, I want to die...” He responded “you made your bed, now you have to lay in it.”

He was referring to an act of exposure I pulled a couple of years back. I shared unflattering truths about my dad, because I was asked by someone who my dad is close with. I didn’t volunteer the information and I certainly did not want to deface anyone. I was honest about my dads abusive and manipulative past. To make a very long story short, my father told me that unless I told everyone that I lied about what I said, and I had made it all up, we wouldn’t have a relationship. The truth is, I would be lying if I said I had made it all up. It was all true. Nobody wants that to be true. Not a single person feels pride when they admit they have been a victim of abuse, at least, not me. It makes me feel weak and pathetic. As if I didn’t have the strength to stop it. (Side note: I never used the word “abuse” until one day a therapist told me the only way I could heal from the trauma and move past it, would be to admit that I was abused. So, now I use that shameful word). So, because of all of this, at my moment of feeling suicidal, my dad told me to lay in the bed I had made. He truly believed that he had done no wrong, and the feelings I had were from an accumulation of a life filled with lies and deceit. He projected his reality onto me. 

In that moment, it dawned on me that what I was experiencing was love with conditions. A contract, per-say. It shattered my heart into a million little pieces. I felt unworthy and like my existence on this earth was meaningless. What purpose do I have if both of my parents and I have no relationship? I have been thrown to the world to figure this all out by myself. Without guidance. I am alone. I have no pack. I feel like the two people that are supposed to be there no matter what, aren’t. It’s scary. In fact, it’s terrifying.

I will never forget that day. Something switched “off” in me, and I am really struggling to find the switch to turn it back “on”. It was like my brain sent a message to my heart. The message was: “no matter how much someone tells you they love you or they like you, if you do something that doesn’t benefit them, they will drop you.” It’s left me scared. Emotionally losing my father has been the other top 2 experiences that has been the most painful.

Will my friends drop me if I have done something that they don’t agree with? Could my boyfriend choose to leave if he no longer gained from me? Would his family discontinue to like me (assuming they do) if I said something too opinionated. Does my family truly love me? Or do they love themselves and whatever they do to/for me is still beneficial to their livelihood and that’s why they do it.

Relationships are terrifying to me, because I feel like they are volatile. Love has evolved, but not for the stronger. Evolution has allowed for so many different variations of love, many of which I don’t understand. All of which, terrify me, because I don’t want to lose another person that I love. I want to hear someone tell me that they love me and that be the end of it. I don’t want to lay down on broken glass and let them walk all over me, just to continuously receive that love. 

I know relationships of all sorts take work. I know that to be loved you have to give love. I am learning the balance. I am trying to love good people so that I can receive pure love in return. The process in finding that has been really painful.

My hope is to one day have grown past all of this and only be left with those true people who know me, in all of my forms, the good, the bad, and the ugly, and choose to stay. 

[realestatejenn]

Self-Care is not an option, it is a necessity. I will admit that for the last 7-8 months I have not been ok. I have felt like a failure in every aspect of my life. Struggling with my happiness, my family, my confidence, my career, basically everything. You see, I have become a pro at faking the positivity and painting a smile on my face. And then a couple weeks ago, I broke. Ugly, ugly tears releasing all the anger, frustration, hurt and pain I was feeling but I knew I still needed to shut the world off for a little while. I needed to get away from everything. One Thursday a very dear friend of mine said, why don't you drive to Hilton Head with me on Saturday. A day to plan? My response was, let me see if I can make that happen. And with that, all the short notice planning came together thanks to some amazing people in my life who helped take care of my son and my puppy. They have no idea how much that was truly and deeply appreciated. I spent the week at the beach. Soaking up the sun, sand and surf. I caught up on sleep , relaxation and I shut off work for the first time in years!!! Now, nothing automatically goes back to "everything is amazing" BUT I have restored my want to fight. The fight for my family happiness, my fight to want to succeed, the fight to keep my positivity, my fight to give it 110% every single day #selfcare #ittakesavillage #selfesteem #happiness #entrepreneur #BeachTherapy #beachlife #BeachesAndBikinis #Travel #Wanderer #girlsonthemove #goals #rawpost #feelings #restored https://www.instagram.com/p/CBIzTD_DvgG/?igshid=19wft072gkm8t

[auspectris]

decided i should post just some silly little FR sketches . rawposted instead of queued today but i really, really like obelisk dragons

[mme-faith-haiku]

💭What have you been working on creatively?🤔 : ... ☑ YouTube ☑ Photography Concepts ☑ Sketching more ☑ Writing (Poems/Raps) .... Whatever time I'm not spending on things I need to do like .... ☑ Work (85% ⏰) ☑ Self care ☑ Financial burdens ☑ Organization ⏳I'm also a perfectionist.. I want to make sure everything is good before I put my name on anything⏳ . . . #sinceyouvebeengone #rawposts #rawart #creativity #photography #youtube #poems #raps #laptop #sketching #laptopstickers #creativedirector #njartist #artistfromphilly #selfcare #blogger #blackhippie #motivation #inspiration #naturephotography #female photographer

[mingulay-archive]

its 0017 hours and i mended the sea witchs baggywrinkles so its time for mina morgan rawposting

[maniacpixiedreamgirl]

yea.png

[codypunk]

you all heard him call himself codys guardian angel right

[happycircumstance]

L07 Critical Thinking Peer Partner Discussion Essay: Education

“Education is vital for our success. My parents would always tell me that I must strive harder to get good grades and finish a degree because it is the only treasure they can leave to me when the time comes. They sacrificed a lot for me to be able to enroll in a good school. Well, it was all worth it when I was able to hand them my diploma.

Our church leaders has counseled us to obtain an education and become self-reliant. Alma said to his sons to "learn wisdom in thy youth . . .to keep the commandments of God." We can better understand when we are learned. We become effective leaders when we follow the commandments with exactness.

However, we should not discredit those who have surpassed the ladder of success without formal education. Indeed, it depends on our determination whether to let the lack of money or other personal matter deter us from success.

We live in a time where technology is mostly the source of information. Let us take advantage of it and make the most our of our data subscription. Education is still one of the best tools to make a better life; to provide for the family; to be who our Father wants us to be.”

[maniacpixiedreamgirl]

scene of all time

[maniacpixiedreamgirl]

shauna eating jackies ear and will thinking he ate abigails ear. something about ears can be so personal...