#rb only if u want

[cowboylexapro]

shameless face reveal bc why not?

[oatbugs]

last night i got home kind of tipsy and very much in tears and my mother told me the force you exert to keep someone in your life is proportional to the force with which they will leave your life. if you have to fight tooth and claw to keep them, their leaving will be just as hard, just as harsh, and just as definite.

[juiceofmoons]

˗ˏˋnew oddinary sibling droppedˎˊ˗

[cringelordofchaos]

If this post reaches one hundred notes I'll do that ONE thing on my to do list that I've been meaning to do for a while but haven't gotten around to doing it yet

[coldresolve]

Hi, I'm Elias, I'm a 26yo trans guy from Denmark. I write shit, I draw shit, and I get into unneccesarily tedious arguments with anons about torture apologia in fiction. I think that sums up my vibe

I've made a few posts about this already, but tl;dr: the Danish NHS has been refusing to treat me for gender dysphoria for the better part of a year now because they've deemed me "unstable." Unstable how, you ask?

I have depression.

No, that is quite literally it. Full context under the readmore.

Fighting to be heard and having the door repeatedly slammed in your face sucks peak ass, and I'm done now. The NHS is so lackluster when it comes to trans people, all of a sudden, it makes perfect sense to me why 31% of transgender Danes get HRT outside of the NHS.

And I'd rather not have to turn to the black market, so rn I'm hoping to get a prescription with GenderGP. The issue is, I'm poor as fuck and can't afford the start-up fees for the forseeable future - unless I do something like this. I hate asking others for money, and I hate it even more if I'm not in a place where I can give anything in return. But I also recognize I'm in over my head with this, so. If you've got a cent or two to spare, I'd be grateful as hell.

I've mathed it out, and my best estimate is that I need around 3500,- DKK / $500 USD. Again, this is just to cover the initial subscription as well as mandatory consultations/blood tests. I should be able to cover the prescriptions on my own, as well as further tests/consultations down the line, so I'm hoping this is a one-and-done sort of thing.

paypal: elimunpau@gmail.com

Also, important note. We're in a global cost of living/housing crisis and this isn't a strict life-or-death situation. If you're in a tough spot right now, don't send me anything, that'd just make me feel worse about asking. I appreciate the thought but you gotta take care of your own needs first. Peace and take care ✌️

So I've been dealing with major depressive disorder since I was 11. It runs in my family, and as you might imagine, after 15 years of living with this thing, I've learned how to manage it pretty well by now. I know what it's like to genuinely be unstable - and if I were in a place like that, no problem, I'd be open about that. I wouldn't be making decisions like this. I know myself. You kind of have to when you're dealing with a chronic mental illness.

Here's where I am right now: I've got no suicidal ideation, been clean from self harm for four years, no psychosis, no inpatient admissions for the last five years. I live on my own, take my meds, and I'm keeping my life in order. Depressed, yes, but about as stable as someone with my history can get, and ask anyone who knows me, me wanting to get on HRT isn't some spur of the moment decision. I've done a fucking decade of soul searching, and a few years ago, I finally (duh) reached the conclusion that living as a woman isn't something I can even fake being content with - believe me, I've tried. I'm well aware of the scope of medical transition, but I'm settled in who I am. And I just want to live like me now. That's the only thing I want.

If it counts for anything, my partner and family have supported me through this, which has been priceless obviously, but it also goes to show that me saying "I'm capable of making medical decisions" isn't purely a personal assessment. I'm pretty sure they'd speak up if they thought I was being unstable about it or whatever

But the CPH clinic for sexology, who have consistently refused to listen to me telling them all this, have somehow magically aquired divine knowledge on my capacity to make adult decisions about my own body, and on the basis that I have MDD, they're refusing to even set me up for a preliminary interview - one that would preceed a 6 month full-team psych evaluation before the prospect of HRT would even come up. They said in their latest refusal that they wont accept another referral from me until a year after my last in-clinic conversation with them, which happened on October 24th, 2023 - meaning that with the NHS, if they accepted my referral come October (which I don't have much faith they will), the earliest I could possibly get on HRT is April 2025. Arguing for my own sanity would've sucked enough as is, but it's made harder by the fact that they won't even talk to me. You're a trans guy who would like healthcare, but you have a mental illness? Good luck, you're on your own. Long live the Danish bureaucracy.

Dysphoria makes me fucking miserable. I'd rather not have to write a sob story here, and tumblr is like 80% trans people so I guess a good portion of you can imagine why waiting another year for the possibility of maybe-perhaps-if-all-goes-well getting on HRT would not actually make me less miserable about it.

So. I'm sitting down next week along with my mom to file a formal complaint with the patient's rights committee. I don't know what to call this other than some form of discrimination on the basis of mental illness, because nothing in my current situation would prohibit me from making medical decisions for myself. And I honestly don't think that a complaint is going to do much, but I intend to make it obnoxiously long, because by law, a specialized doctor and an attorney have to read through the whole thing. If you can't beat 'em, make 'em read 50 pages of you going into detail about why you think they suck, right

And yeah, like I said, in the meantime, I'm trying to go via GenderGP. It'd be nice if my poor ass could get HRT via the NHS instead of having to pay out of pocket, but apparently the bar for entry requires that you 1) have gender dysphoria to the point where it impedes normal function and 2) somehow aren't mentally ill. Who wrote these rules? Some 60yo cis guy in a suit in Christiansborg, I imagine.

Feel free ask about anything relating to this whole situation, I'll be as open as I can about it, cause I understand that if you're going to give money to someone, you want to know what it's going to. Though I hope you understand I'm not going to doxx myself more than I already have now, or give you my entire medical history - only what's relevant to my current situation.

I know Denmark is a welfare state and on a global scale we're doing alright, but I hope you don't mind if I say this: This shouldn't be happening as often as it does. Fuck the Danish NHS.

[higaneion]

reblog this post and add your 5 favorite lines you've written this year

[joelletwo]

sharing the mangaka @kastellaran sold me on (and then i died badly this was like a week ago i think lol) just bc i feel obligated to pass their work on to the ppl who enjoyed tricornered its. EXTREMELY of a piece. bl authors love [psychological] [erotica] [supernatural detectives] [fucked up weirdos] with so so lovingly inked in suits. APPARENTLY 🙏

psychedelia - detective gets shot and visits his partner in an out-of-body experience. his partner spends the whole time fantasizing about him which is great news for him who can see his thoughts (<- HORRIBLE SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT. but theyre cute). really funny sense of humor in the writing/panel pacing and really beautiful horniness for the male form in the art (^ i was so happy to see those tits)

stigmata - special division detective who can physically relive ppl's deaths and his handler. very. EXTREMELY horny about the gore. and i think basically all the cases are about assault on women and this gets really visceral/personal at some points. very well done. very thoughtful relationship between these two. very very luxurious indulgent art. man this author loves drawing butts in suits. 🙏🙏🙏

[sanctus-ingenium]

i served i gave cunt i died

same template as last year, by mossygator

[kinnbig]

okay so. I think a lot of what was leaked is kind of irrelevant. like yeah he's being a bit mean about his costars but like. eh. that's their own personal drama and doesn't necessarily need to be a scandal. him secretly not liking bible or apo or anyone is like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whatever! he's rude and it's embarrassing of him but it's not the thing that's relevant here imo

what is relevant in the leaked messages is his constant homophobia and misogyny, his demonstrated lack of remorse for his past homophobia and misogyny, and the continued evidence of him being threatening and violent.

that's what is so insane that people are continuing to defend. I don't care that he was a bit rude about his coworkers. I care that his threatening, sexist, homophobic behaviour continues to get ignored and defended by his fans. I care that the bigotry and the gossip are being equivocated, allowing the actual offensive things he said to be swept under the rug of "aren't we all a bit gossipy sometimes in our private messages?"

because sure. most of us are probably a bit mean about our friends/coworkers in private sometimes. but I sure hope we aren't all saying half of the shit that he was saying in some of those messages.

[voidimp]

ummm ok u can have kind of spicy flavor sketch. as a treat

(its hard to tell but the thumb is pressing a pill down)

[arinakaard]

me and my friends would've killed the noise with hammers i can tell you that much /ref

[rb9]

technically max doesn’t need to race in vegas bc he already has the championship, also he hates it SO MUCH so all im saying is i think it would have been real entertaining to see daniel in the rb for this weekend

[yeonban]

*Permanent interactions call.

I've been thinking about it for a while now, but like or comment on this post if you're alright with me sending you asks either unprompted or from prompts you've reblogged ages ago whenever I feel like it & if you're alright with receiving random starters if I ever have the ideas for them! You're never going to be obligated to reply to them though, so they'll just be possibilities for interactions in case you ever have the inspo for them!

[batmanshole]

sorry for treating school like a fashion show. it WILL happen again though.

it/she/he

[onewingedangels]

thewolfkissed ->->-> onewingedangels

it's my cr*sis c*re rem*ster brainrot coming very soon, also as much as i love eivor i got tired of the old url, maybe i will change it back some time later...

i still track userwolfkissed

like if seen <3

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl