#replacement pens are like £100 on their own though so i have to watch this thing like a hawk for the rest of my life now

[possiblytracker]

cintiq get

still feels like an absurdly high-end piece of equipment for me to have even tho its about 10 years old and very obviously pre-owned. this thing just feels more expensive compared to my old midrange huion. like its Solid and definitely more sturdy.. i think the only thing i could give or take is that it needs mains power to work, but its not like my last one was much more portable (i still needed mains power or my laptop would drain out in like 20 minutes oops) so its not a dealbreaker i still like it :)

still figuring out how to use it and getting used to the very different Penfeel so i'm probably gonna keep switching between it and the old one (while it still works) to work on serious art i need to look good, but. i am glad to have it :)

[hardlyinteresting]

Risks Worth Taking 2/2

This is the second half, part 2/2 of the story, thank you to everyone who has read it! Professor!Zemo x Student reader Part 1 here The reader takes Zemo’s philosophy class focusing on Machiavelli. Posted in 2 parts because it exceeded the textbox limit. Apx 3k words.

Warnings: student-teacher relationship (the reader is of age, no real focus on power imbalance), implied age gap, consumption of alcohol, implication that the reader is sleeping with Zemo for better grades (she's not) and of course let me know if you want me to add anything else!!

Week five, he is not shocked to find she’s once again the first one in class. “Good evening,” he greets warmly, unwrapping his scarf from around his neck as he makes his way to his desk. She smiles back, “I left my paper on your desk there, I figured I’d get the pile started”. He laughs setting down his coat and bag, “Something tells me there will be few submissions for this class”.

He’s right. Less than half the class bothers to show up. Most of her peers seem to be getting a head start on winter break, at least the class is quiet she thinks content listening to Helmut summarize the most recently assigned chapters, providing historical context where needed.

“Enjoy your break Helmut,” she says softly as he shuts the lecture hall door.

“You as well. Do you have plans?” She shakes her head, “No, just reading”. He smiles, “Then I am sure it will be a good break indeed”.

The cafe is warm and cosy. She settles comfortably into her favourite booth with her favourite book and a second cup of tea.

The bell at the front door dings as a man enters in a long black coat and leather gloves. Fancy she thinks to herself as he approaches the counter to order. It's usually other students dressed in sweatpants and hoodies, the man’s put together dress piques her interest. He orders and then she watches over the top of her book as he drops a $10 bill into the barista’s tip jar. Oh, well dressed and exceedingly well mannered. She can't help but watch him as he waits. Removing his gloves he tucks them into his pockets and unbuttons his coat, she swears she can smell his cologne from where she sits; it's incredible!

“Cherry blossom tea for Helmut?” The barista calls sliding the cup across the counter.

Helmut? It isn't. Is it? He turns after saying a polite thank you, and she can feel her heart hammering as he turns and she sees his face. It is. She's not sure why she's shocked, she did tell him about this place after all. Do I say something? She wonders, weighing the pros and cons, but her thoughts are halted when she hears his voice,

“Hello,” he smiles softly, “I didn't expect you to be here--I know you pointed this place out, but I wasn't--”

He's worried he's intruding. Oh, how the tables have turned.

“No, no. It's okay! I don't own the place-- did you want to sit? You don't have to--”

He chuckles as her nerves get the best of her.

Silently he sets down his cup shrugging out of his coat, putting it over the back of the chair before sitting down.

“What are you reading?” He smiles, trying to peak at the cover.

Again, after their initial stiffness, the conversation flows smoothly, just like it had in his office. After several warm drinks, and a couple croissants ordered between the two of them it’s grown dark outside. Neither had noticed the cafe empty out slowly over the hours, the barista cleaning up for the night until she clears her throat from behind the counter. They both turn to look at her, finally noticing how quiet the shop is.

“Sorry, we’re closing now,” the barista smiles sweetly. “Not a problem. I apologise, we lost track of time. We’ll get out of your way,” Helmut apologizes. The pair collect their things sliding back into their coats and gloves. Helmut waits patiently for her to be ready to go his hand resting gently at the small of her back as she slips out of the booth and past him.

Helmut stops and puts another bill in the girl’s tip jar.

“Sorry for keeping you,” he apologises again.

Outside the winter wind is cold against their faces.

“Are you hungry?” Helmut asks.

“I could eat,” She responds. “Ever been there?” Helmut asks pointing to the pub across the street. “I don’t know if it’s your speed. It’s not super nice or anything, but their food is decent,” she says honestly. He laughs, “‘Decent’ is better than what I can make at home by myself”.

She bites her lip thinking about it, does he want to spend more time with me?

“Okay,” she smiles as they make their way across the street.

Settled at a table, they wait for their server, she asks, “Was that a fifty dollar bill I saw you put in that tip jar?”

He shrugs, “Yes”.

He says that as if it’s normal, she thinks.

“I know you’re not from here, but you do know that’s a lot of money right?” “Yes,” he shrugs again, “But she made excellent tea all afternoon, she let us stay as late as she could and she was polite. And I have been here long enough to know that servers of any kind don’t get paid fairly. I can afford it, she deserves it”.

She feels the smile grow across her face, she considers gushing that he’s such a good person, but instead what comes out is, “I’m really starting to consider becoming a professor”.

He laughs, “I told you, it’s family money, not my facility pay”. God, that laugh, sets off butterflies in her stomach, the warm, genuine sound of his laughter.

He continues, “Before Sokovia fell, my family were royalty. I was a Baron there”. “I knew your name sounded familiar,” she sighs, “I remember hearing about Sokovia on the news. I remember your name, you were building orphanages and relief centres”.

He nods sadly, “Many of us thought we could salvage what we had left after everything. We couldn’t”.

“I’m so sorry,” she says, without thinking she reaches across the table to place a comforting hand on his arm. His hand comes to cover hers, so much larger than her own.

There’s a silence between them for one of the first moment since he sat down with her earlier at the cafe. But it’s not uncomfortable, it’s the opposite -- a silence of understanding, both parties knowing there’s nothing they can say to make things better-- they can only ruminate.

The peace is broken by a waiter coming to take their orders. “Do you drink Helmut?” She asks with a mischievous smile. “I have been known to indulge,” he confesses, his eyebrows furrowed. “Two shots of ?” she turns to look at Helmut expectantly. “Vodka,” he replies. “Two shots of vodka, and an order of cheese fries to share please,” she orders, “thank you”.

The waiter returns not before long, placing the drinks and food on the table.

She holds her shot glass up waiting for him to do the same. “Prost,” he says raising his glass towards her. “Cheers,” she responds clinking her glass into his before they both tip them back.

And that’s how their night begins.

It’s nearing midnight when they settle their bill, Helmut insisting he pay-- though she put up a good fight. “Can I walk you home?” He asks looking at her under the light of the street lamps. She nods, her face feeling warm both from his attention and the alcohol coursing through her bloodstream. Her apartment is only three blocks away, but time seems to slow down as they walk arm in arm through the freshly fallen snow. At her door they stop, she looks up at him, him down at her. Without a thought, lips meet. It’s not rough or particularly sexy, but she feels her knees go weak when his hand comes to cup her cheek, his other splayed across the small of her back pulling her closer. This kiss deepens and she clutches the lapel of his wool coat before they both pull away. “Sorry,” he mumbles. “Don’t be,” she sighs.

Then the thought hits her, “How are you getting home?” “Oh-- I was going to get a cab and go back to the cafe to pick up my car in the morning,” he explains. “Nonsense-- you can stay here,” she offers unlocking her door and stepping inside, he doesn’t follow. “Not in my bed,” she laughs flicking on the light, “I’ll set you up on the couch”. He steps inside.

In the morning he wakes to the sun shining through the window. It takes him a minute to orient himself remembering he crashed on her couch. He sits up taking a moment to look around the apartment, it’s cute. Books and textbooks and notebooks strewn about the place. It’s homey and inviting and every bit what he’d expect her space to look like. Carefully he grabs one of the open notebooks tearing out a page he writes a quick note:

Good morning, I find that I feel very sorry for having to leave before you wake. Alas, I have much to get done, and I do not wish to trespass in your home longer than needed. I am grateful for your hospitality, and even more, your company. If my memory serves correctly I must also apologise for making that advance towards you last night. It was ungentlemanly, and you are unquestionably deserving of much better. I hope you can forgive me, and that you might allow me to make it up to you. -Helmut

Week six.

“He should appear to be compassionate, faithful to his word, guileless, and devout.” Is written across the board. When she settles into her seat. She’s not early this week, rather just on time. Helmut notes the heavy rise and fall of her chest as she tries to catch her breath, he holds back a smile at the thought of her sprinting to his class. When the class is settled, he proceeds to hand back all of the submitted essays, now marked. He smiles as he sets hers on her desk, “Bravo,” he says quietly enough that just she hears it as he shuffles along to the next row of students. She anxiously flips to the last page, red pen scrawl reads 100%. Her jaw drops. There’s no way. She thinks back to the rumours she heard on campus at the beginning of the year, about how difficult a marker he is. Bullshit. Her blood boils, rage sizzling beneath her skin. She avoids his eyes for the rest of class staring down at her notebook as she notices the indents in the blank page-- indents left from where he had written her a note that morning. Her anger freezes replaced by the cold sinking feeling in her chest. All his kind words, all those moments shared-- did he really think she was just spending time with him for a better grade? What kind of handout does he expect to get from her? She scolds herself now for the little crush she’d developed-- how stupid could she be? The prince must appear to be virtuous in order to hide his actions, She remembers from her reading, a dagger to her chest as she thinks bitterly that she’s not shocked that the professor is practising what he preaches.

The class ends and he moves to collect his paperwork, sorting it back into his bag. She stays. “I’m glad you stayed behind,” he starts. “I’m sure you are,” she says sharply. Confused he puts his things down turning to face her. “Have I done something to upset you?” He asks seriously his head tilted to the side as he racks his brain for anything he may have done to make her so cross. Perhaps his note was not sufficient in conveying his apology? “Do you think I’m stupid? Or that I’m naive?” she asks arms crossed, “I’m not sleeping with you for a good grade,” she states firmly, sliding her essay back across her desk, “feel free to adjust my grade accordingly”. Is that what she thinks? His mouth goes dry, his mind and heart racing with all the different ways he wants to apologise, to tell her that she has it wrong. He approaches her, finally making eye contact with her, “Your grade will stay as it is. I mark all of my student’s work without looking at the cover pages. I have always strived to remain impartial. Your essay was marked no differently,” He explains calmly, “I would be wrong to say that I don’t hold any affections for you-- it is quite the opposite. I enjoy the time we have spent together, and I would like to continue to remain in your company; I hope to eventually find myself in your affections-- but none of this has any bearing on your grade. I am sorry that I have acted in a way where this was not clear”. Her throat clenches, oh. “I’m sorry--Oh my god--I’m so stupid!” her hand flies to cover her mouth. “You have nothing to apologise for-- I should be the one apologising,” he insists. She shakes her head standing to stand in front of him, “We’ve both been obtuse”. “I’d like to make it up to you. I’d like to take you out for dinner-- a proper meal. If you’ll allow me”. She nods her hand coming to rest on his cheek, thumb running gently across his cheekbone, “I would like that,” she says quietly, her eyes glazing at his lips, “But only after the semester is done and I’ve graduated”. “If that is what you want,” he nods understanding. She can feel him leaning in, her eyes flickering up to his caramel eyes and back down to his lips, his hand rests on her hip, but he waits for her to close the gap between them.

Last day of the school year.

She waits by the door to the lecture hall as he speaks to his class. She listens to the back and forth of conversing ideas from the students, her heart beating faster every time Helmut speaks. It takes a while for everyone to leave when the class is over, but he does his best not to make her wait too long, gathering his things as quickly as possible, he makes his way over to her.

“Maybe I should’ve taken this course, the conversation was much more lively!” She laughs. “Your intelligent thoughts would have been wasted here, my dear” He smiles shutting the door behind him, “your class needed a brilliant mind in it”.

The summer goes by quickly. Fine dining, nights in. reading during rainstorms. Nights of soft romance, followed by nights of passion. Pasts shared. Futures envisioned. In his bed the night before the new school year she rolls over to lay almost on top of him, laughing when he lets out an oof. “Old man she teases,” earning a playful pinch on the thigh from him.

She glances at his nightstand, a copy of The Prince laying there.

“And what are your personal feelings about Machiavelli anyway? You never speak about your own thoughts”

“You're so clever,” he laughs, “but you're right”.

He sighs pulling her closer. he tries to focus on his hand running up and down her arm, how soft her sweater is under his fingertips. He takes a deep breath before speaking, “every time I read it, my opinions change,” he confesses, “there was a time when I was young and stupid; thought I was invincible that I agreed with a lot of his ideals. Then I grew older, fell in love--I thought him stupid and lonely. I experienced an incredible loss--”

She squeezes his side as she hears his voice grow tense with tears, he swallows and continues, “and then I thought I understood him. I learned how to grieve and I thought him intolerable. In the end I learn more about myself than I do him”.

She smiles, “and have you read it lately?”

He nods kissing her softly, “I have”.

“And?”

“I learned to trust my instincts. To take the risks that are worth taking”

“You're kind of a sap,” she laughs, her face getting warm she buries it in his chest. Part 1 here

[cowboy-anon]

▶️ Apple :D go make some applepie :)

(yes my humour is very broken xD)

I swear this was supposed to be fluffy and short, but it got angsty and long instead. It’s so long it deserves a title AND I’m tagging people! Today Apple bakes a pie and we learn a bit more about Benji. 🍏 I’m not 100% satisfied with it but it’s still pretty good.

I should probably also note that everything I’ve mentioned so far is basically canon, besides a few minor details. Like, yeah, Jimmy’s canon, y’all.

CW: Broken whumpee, clueless whumpee, crying, food, implied captivity, neglect, pet whump, referenced past loss of consciousness, referenced past punishment, referenced past whipping, Stockholm Syndrome, unhealthy habits, yelling

Tagging: @sideblogformindtrash, @unicornscotty, @milk-carton-whump, @happy-whumper, @whumperfulart (Let me know if you want to be added or removed from this list! <3 )

Apple Pie

Apple doesn’t think your humor is broken at all, although admittedly he doesn’t get the joke. At the suggestion, he smiles. An apple pie would be a great idea to win back Master Clay’s affections, especially after yesterday!

Of course, to get his ingredients, Apple needs Master Clay to go to the store, and to get his ingredients on Master Clay’s list, he has to visit Benji. Apple hasn’t even seen them since their unconscious body was carried out of the extra bedroom last night. Still, Apple knows that for the next week, whatever Benji asks for, they’ll get. That’s how it always goes.

So Apple moves to sit up, but the instant he does, his back flares with sore, stinging pain. Ow, ow, ow! He freezes, biting back a whimper as his shirt settles against the raw skin. The sting fades into constant but bearable discomfort.

This time when he moves, he goes slower, and the pain feels like less. Apple feels overwhelming relief when he makes his way down the hallway and the hurt is tolerable.

Benji doesn’t talk, eat, or sleep much after a punishment, and this time is no different. When Apple nudges open the door to Master Clay’s bedroom, they’re laying on their stomach in the dark with the shades drawn, illuminated only by the haunting light of the TV. Master Clay always moves it for them on days like this.

They’re looking at the TV, red-rimmed eyes staring but unseeing at the colorful reality show playing on screen. When Apple sees them, he kind of wants to go back into the living room and wait until Benji’s okay again. He hates seeing them like this, so sad and quiet and small.

Maybe this treat will help cheer them up, too!

Apple pushes the door all the way open and crawls into the room, careful to shut it quietly behind him. “Benji?” His own voice is hoarse from yesterday, too, so he clears his throat and tries again a little louder when Benji doesn’t move. “Benji?”

Benji shifts on the bed, just enough for Apple to know they heard him. Apple crawls closer and kneels in front of them on the floor. It takes a moment for their red eyes to meet Apple’s, but when they do, Apple smiles.

“I need some stuff from the store today.” Apple grabs the pen and notepad sitting on Benji’s nightstand and offers it to them. “For an apple pie for Master Clay.”

Benji shakes their head slowly. Not now, Apple. He can see it on their face. They’re hurting today. Apple feels bad for pressing, but he’s sure Master Clay and Benji will both appreciate it later!

“Please? It’s only a little.”

Benji looks angry and exhausted all at once, and Apple thinks if Benji says no this time, he might just drop it. But Benji just sighs, then squeezes their eyes shut.

Rarely ever does Benji take a punishment worse than Apple, but this was one of those times. If the deep, bracing breaths are any indication, Benji’s thinking the same thing.

Apple doesn’t know what they’re doing until they let out a long pained hiss.  Benji pushes themself up and moves around until they’re laying on their side and facing Apple. Benji takes the notepad, then motions with the pen. What do you want me to write?

Apple grins. Thank you, thank you, thank you! “Apples and brown sugar and cinnamon and a lemon. We need more flour, too. Oh, and ice cream!”

Benji writes everything down slowly, probably so they don't hurt themself more, and Apple watches mystified. Even though their hand shakes, their writing is still so pretty and swirly.

When they’re done, Benji peels the top sheet off the notepad, gingerly folds it up, and puts everything back on the nightstand. Then they settle back onto their stomach on top of the duvet.

From this angle, Apple can see the edges of angry red marks peeking out from the bandaging wrapped all around their back. Master Clay was kind to take care of Benji’s wounds like that. Maybe if Apple hadn’t tried to steal that apple, he would’ve gotten the same treatment.

When Apple looks back at Benji’s face, they’re staring at the TV again. He takes that as his cue to leave, being careful to shut the door quietly behind him.

***

When Master Clay returns with the ingredients, Apple is a little disappointed to find that he forgot the ice cream, but not ten minutes later, Master Clay passes through the kitchen grumbling about it. Apple’s pulling his ingredients together on the floor when Master Clay snatches his keys off the counter and leaves again.

Did Benji tell him that he’d forgotten it? Or maybe Master Clay noticed how disappointed Apple was and realized what he had forgotten! Regardless of the reason, Apple can’t believe Master Clay would drive all the way back to the store just to pick up some ice cream for him!

Apple feels a stab of loneliness every time Master Clay walks out the door, but it’s good that he’s gone. If he’s quick, he’ll have this pie done before he gets back. He can hardly imagine his surprise!

So Apple doesn’t waste any time. He mixes together all the dry ingredients for the dough and then cuts in the butter, careful not to overwork it before tossing it in the freezer. The apples are next. He cuts them nice and precise, and he makes sure the measurements are just right. Who knew that cooking show Benji watches would’ve come in handy like this?

Apple gets so into it that he starts to hum a little tune under his breath. He doesn’t remember what it’s called, but it’s soft and uplifting and he starts it over again as he lines the tin with the pie crust and layers in the apples.

Finally, Apple pulls together a streusel topping. It’s really easy, and it’s a touch of his own personal flavor since he’s not using the traditional lattice. By the time it’s in the oven, he’s forgotten all about his raw back, but he gets a harsh reminder when he leans up against the bottom cupboards while he waits. He winces and twists so that he’s leaning on his shoulder, not his back.

He doesn’t realize he’s fallen asleep until the oven beeps.

Apple wakes with a jolt, frantically trying to orient himself with his eyes. Right, he’s in the kitchen, on the floor. When he looks up, there’s a pint of vanilla ice cream sitting on the countertop, half-melted but still ice cream.

Apple smiles groggily to himself and eases onto his knees. It’s hard reaching into the oven from here, but he manages it. He uses a dish rag to pull the pie out from the heat and sets it on the floor in front of him.

The smell is heavenly. It takes all Apple has not to dig into the pie right then and there, because he made the pie for Master Clay and Benji, not himself. He barely ignores the way his stomach growls when he catches a whiff of buttery crust and spiced fruit.

Apple cuts a big slice for Master Clay and another for Benji, he scoops a spoonful of ice cream on top of each, and then he crawls over on his knees with the two plates and spoons in hand back to Master Clay’s room.

Apple gives the door a gentle knock before entering just in case Benji’s asleep.

“Master Clay? Benji? I brought you some pie.” Apple doesn’t know if he’s just surprised or fully disappointed that Master Clay isn’t in the room with Benji, but he supposes it’s a mix of both when he sees Benji propped up against the headboard of the bed. “Master Clay…?”

Benji shakes their head, eyes still glued to the TV. Not here.

Apple lets the flutter of disappointment go and instead crawls over to the bed, placing one slice of pie on the blanket and offering the other and a spoon to Benji. “I brought pie,” Apple says again.

Benji looks from the TV to the pie, and for the first time all day, a ghost of a smile passes over their lips. Apple can hardly believe it! He did that! Only as quick as it comes, it’s gone and replaced with a far more somber look.

“Benji, are… are you okay?”

Benji looks like they’re about to nod their head, but they must think better of it because they get impossibly quieter and more withdrawn.

They silently take the plate from Apple and break a piece off with their spoon. Apple’s excitement comes back full force. Hopefully Benji’ll feel better once they’ve eaten!

Benji is about to take the bite when their hand comes back down to the plate and they whisper, barely audible, “I want to go home…”

Apple doesn’t know what to say to that. How could Benji want that? With everything they have—pretty clothes and tender touches and everything they could possibly want—how could they ever want to leave Master Clay?

“You don’t mean that,” Apple murmurs. “That’s just the punishment talking. You have everything here. You can have anything.” At that, Apple feels a pang of something in his chest, but he keeps going. “This is your home, Benji. Master Clay—”

Benji hurls his plate of pie at the wall with a crash.

“THIS ISN’T HOME!”

It’s so loud and Benji’s voice sounds so raw and tearful, and Apple doesn’t know what to do besides bow his head in submission. So he does. Because Benji yelled at him. They’ve never done that before, no matter how exasperated or angry they’ve gotten with him.

The room goes quieter than it’s been all day. Of course the people on TV would choose now of all times to have a quiet moment.

When Apple dares to look back up again, there are tears streaming down Benji’s cheeks. Apple can’t think of anything to say, so all he says is, “Enjoy the pie…” Then he gets onto his hands and knees and crawls out of the room again.

Behind him, Benji’s silent tears turn to sobs, and they continue to whisper, “I just want to go home…”

Apple shuts the door.

[sweetest-honeybee]

Wels and Hels Become Smol

This s what I’m counting as a ‘First Chapter’ but let me know what you think! I’ll write more if y’all like it :D

Summary: Tired of his evil clone, Wels asks Beef to make a new machine to pull Hels out of history. Though....It doesn’t really work that way. Some malfunctions cause a bit of de-aging.

TW: Smoke, sparks, the kinda stuff in terrible machinery. Also brief blood mention but overall not a very triggering chapter.

Characters: Welsknight, Helsknight, VintageBeef, Xisuma

Enjoy!

—————————

It was inevitable. At some point, Wels was going to go back up to Beef asking if by any chance he could get rid of Hels. And at some point, Beef was going to comply and create a whole new machine to test out on the knights. And at some point, Wels was going to drag Hels out of his dimension to use the machine and Hels was going to dread losing his body that he only just got a couple weeks beforehand.

So, that’s where they were now. Underground in Beef’s testing room while Wels discussed the instructions with Beef and how the machine worked, which it probably wouldn’t. Hels on the other hand just sulked against the wall with his arms crossed. He had no sword, no armor, a wrapped arrow wound on his arm from having to be forced down there after being held at bow point.

Beef really wasn’t all too excited if he were being honest. Mostly since he didn’t have a lot of faith in the machine working but surely if he reversed some settings here and there, Hels would disappear and the Hermitcraft server would have one less evil doppelgänger to worry about. Though, his cloning machine was technically successful and Hels really hadn’t done any harm since he just stayed in his dimension. There wasn’t really a need for this.

But, either way, it came down to Wels, who made it very clear that he held such a distaste for his evil counterpart. That being said, Beef instructed both knights to step inside the machine at the same time holding a clock. Really, he intended for it to work like a time machine but without Wels going back in time. Essentially, if it was going to work, he would be able to pick and choose what did and didn’t happen on the day Hels was created and thus Hels would disappear and the whole thing would be forgotten.

Reluctantly, Hels shuffled inside the glass tube connecting from the ceiling to the floor with Wels and snatched the clock from the patiently waiting Beef outside of it. Weld rolled his eyes but who was he to judge. He certainly didn’t want to be erased from history more than Hels did but it had to be done if the evil hermit had ill intentions for their lovely server.

“And you’re really sure you wanna go through with this?” the butcher clarified before he handed Wels his clock. A bit of guilt emerged with what he was about to do, but again, it was Wels’s decision.

Wels hardly hesitated with his answer. “Yes, I do. If Evil Xisuma can escape banning then I’m not risking anything.” The knight eyed his counterpart as he said it, only earning a hard glare in return.

“You were better off just killing me,” Hels replied with a sneer. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Beef shrugged, handing Wels his clock. He took a last glance at Hels who made an obvious commitment to avoiding eye contact. Before the butcher could really dwell on it further, he shut the iron door on the machine and moved behind a newly mined out area in the back of the room. Thick layers of glass separated it from the machine for the sake of his own safety and redstone connected to a leaver trailed from the machine through a small hole by his feet.

“Alright, you guys ready? And again, Wels, you’re absolutely positively 100% sure you want to do this?”

“Yes,” both knights dragged.

Beef sighed. “Okay, here we go then.”

The butcher took the lever and flipped it, almost kind of surprised that it even turned on. Lights and buttons on the wall flashed periodically, the smooth whirring noise lasted more than five seconds, and neither of the knights expressed any unusual discomfort from what he could see. Good signs, that meant that he could open the control panel and begin removing Hels.

Though, he must’ve spoken too soon when the whirring began becoming choppy, sparks replacing its paused seconds. Where the sparks came from, bits of smoke emerged and the moment the other two saw it, they, even Hels, sent Beef very worried expressions.

The malfunctions continued when various beeping voiced from the machine and the clouds of smoke grew larger.

“Ohh….that cannot be a good sign,” Beef muttered, pulling his hands to his hair. Admittedly, he should’ve just shut off the machine but he was too busy freaking out.

“Uh, Beef?” Wels began, his voice sounding muddled from the loud sounds in the room. Yet, Beef could hear him. The knight pointed at his clock. “I don’t wanna assume but I don’t think this was supposed to happen!”

That earned a smack upside head from Hels.

“Just give it a second I think it’ll figure itself out!” Beef decided, still ignoring the lever beside him.

“Oh for the love of- I’m breaking out!” Hels announced. Before his fist even made it to the glass, every light in the room shut off with a loud crack, the machine shutting down with it and the sound of shattering glass.

Startled, the butcher covered his face, only peeking through his fingers when all he heard was silence. No snarky comment from Hels, no attempt at an uplifting comment from Wels. He pulled his hands from his face, trying to look through the thick layers of smoke in the room on the other side of the glass. He couldn’t see the figures of either knight and at that moment, he began panicking, wondering if he had just erased both of them from history all together.

Quickly, he ran into the clouded room, glass crunching under his feet, muttering curses along the way. The entire tube was no longer there, just in shards on the floor. He waited for a second, watching the smoke thin a little more before continuing. Thankfully, some light from the doorway emerged, casting yellow rays into the room. Beef squinted into the used-to-be machine with the new source of light, seeing two much much smaller figures, not hardly a block and a half tall. One stood, wobbling for a second, then falling into the glass from tripping on a wad of something beneath its feet.

And at that moment, Beef heard a child crying.

Oh, oh no. Oh no, no, no, no.

He took off his apron, using it to fan away the smoke. He crouched down near the little figure, letting the light do its work for him. The crying continued, then another child’s cry began and now both of them were crying. As the smoke cleared, two of the smallest toddlers he’d ever seen looked right at him. Sets of the biggest, bluest and reddest, tearful eyes rested on him. The blue eyed toddler notably was covered in scratches from his fall onto the ground.

“Oh my….Wels?” He looked at the red eyed toddler. “Hels?”

For some reason, that only made the blue eyed one, which he’s now assuming is Wels, cry again. Probably since Beef was looking on the brink of a lot of external panic. Hels followed suit, sniffling and then choking on a high pitched sob. The butcher rushed to soothe the both of them, picking them up and moving them upstairs- noting how they were too small for their adult clothes and were now naked. They coughed and choked on the leftover smoke through their tears and that really just made him feel worse.

Finally upstairs, he opted to put the two in the animal farm room. He sat them down on the sandstone and it took a few seconds to get them to release their hands from his shirt. Hels complied, calming down to sniffles and moans. Wels on the other hand didn’t let go. The little knight simply tucked his face into Beef’s chest sadly.

“Wels, buddy, you need to let go so I can get the blood off of you, okay?” Wels moved his head, tilting it up at him. Who was he kidding, Beef’s heart melted at the little guy. Though, the snot running down his mouth was a bit of a pain since he now had it all over his shirt.

“Okay,” the toddler mumbled. Beef let out a sigh of relief, thank god he knew words. When did children even start speaking, he was unsure, but Wels understood him and that was all that mattered.

With that, he sat him on the floor next to his twin, Beef moving to grab some wool from the sheep for makeshift bandages. When he turned back from his crafting table, he found the knights staring at the pigs. Despite their still shared worry and obvious fear, they occasionally giggled at the pigs who squealed and oinked at them.

“That a piggy?” Beef tested. Just to see what they knew.

“Piggy,” the two said back to him. “Piggy, piggy, piggy, piggy, piggy!” At the word, they erupted into a fit of snorts and laughs, momentarily forgetting their previous moods. That was until Beef approached Wels with a bucket of water and the wool cloths.

“Be brave for me, okay? You’re a tough knight,” he ruffled the child’s hair and was pleased when he stuck out his legs to him. “Thanks, bud, won’t be more than a minute.”

With a patience he didn’t know a toddler could have, considering Wels didn’t hardly squirm away from his grip, he finished in no more than a couple minutes. He washed off the little knight’s knees while the other decided he was bored and went to stick his hands up in the glass pig pen. The butcher’s heart warmed at the sound of the little giggles from it when the pigs didn’t hesitate to lick his hand. Hels pulled his hand back with a squeal, grabbing his counterpart’s attention.

Wels pointed at the pigs, looking at Beef. “Piggy?”

“Sure,” Beef exhaled with a shrug. He left the knight to have his fun with his twin, and the pigs. Now, he needed to make them some clothes. Maybe armor? The thought of toddler sized knight’s armor made him chuckle to himself.

He went to the sheep, grabbing red and blue eyes from the chest. With haste, he sheered the newly died sheep of both colors and set off to the crafting table on the other side of the room while the boys moved to the cows. Sewing wasn’t hard, that was a skill he needed in survival. He knew how to make shirts so it was just like making tiny versions of those shirts and with leg holes and buttons. Easy onesies for the twins.

Momentarily, he was distracted by the two mimicking the mooing coming from the cows. He already knew that would get annoying very quickly.

Beef had a thought while he was making the onesies. We’re they potty trained? Did he need to make diapers as well? How on earth do you handle a toddler? Shaking his head, he opted to make some cloth diapers for the both of them, not wanting to be wrong if he guessed they were already potty trained. The last thing he needed was an accident.

Finishing the onesies and diapers, he whistled at the boys, catching their attention. He held up the onesies and they dramatically awed at his craftsmanship. Beef couldn’t help but to feel a bit of pride at that.

Eagerly, they stumbled up to him to put on their new clothes. One at a time, he clipped the diapers on the, with a safety pin. Then, he slid the onesies on the two and marveled at how they giggled at each other happily, poking at each other’s outfits. Gosh, it was so darn cute.

Now, the real question came to mind. What on earth does he do with them? He’s nowhere near fit for fatherhood at the moment and he needed a lot of alone time to fix that machine. He’d have to explain to Xisuma what happened, won’t he. He’s already imagining how that conversation would go. Hey Xisuma, I just turned two of your Hermits into children please help me. That would end in either utter confusion or laughter. Probably both, knowing the admin.

“Alright then,” he began. The knights looked up at him expectantly. “You guys wanna see Xisuma?” They tilted their heads in unison at the question.

“Is Suma?” Wels asked.

“Iggsooma,” Hels added, as if he were correcting his twin.

Beef grinned at their odd little relationship. “Yeah! Xisuma!”

He threw on his elytra from his inventory, dark wings spreading slightly behind his back. Again, the knights awed at him and he couldn’t help but to laugh. The butcher scooped them up into his arms, the two still weighing not nearly as much as he thought they would but working with sandstone was no easy task.

The trio made their way out of his desert village. He moved Hels to sit with Wels on his other arm so that he could fire off his rockets. As soon as he was in the sky, the knights were squealing with delight at the shrinking ground below them. It took no time to reach Xisuma’s jungle, but where the admin was right now, Beef actually had no clue. In chat, he said something about the iron farm so he flew into the landing bay on it.

Letting both toddlers down on the floor, he pulled out his communicator, letting his friend know that there was an urgent meeting they needed to have up there. It took no time for Xisuma to reply with a yes, much to Beef’s relief. Pocketing his comm, he turned to where the knights ran off to. Really, they were quite interested in the assortment of colorful shucker boxes laying on the floor.

Not to much of his surprise, he already heard another set of flapping wings landing on the bay.

“Alright then, what seems to be the- oh my goodness me.” Xisuma paused abruptly at the sight of the toddlers. Who he could only assume was Wels and Hels given Beef’s message. “Why are they children?!”

Ignoring his concern, they ran up to him happily.

“Suma!” the blond yelled.

Xisuma crouched down, meeting their height as best he could. They were just so small, he wouldn’t have ever expected this. They giggled at his silly looking helmet, the white feathers on the sides were certainly a sight to behold. He ducked his head to let them poke and prod as they pleased.

“Beef, what did you do?” the admin asked.

“Ah, long story. Wels created an evil doppelgänger of himself and in attempts to remove him with a new machine I made, I uh….” he gestured at the two. “That happened.”

“O….kay then. Well, what exactly do I do? I can’t really just change their ages through coding.”

Beef’s stomach sank. “You can’t?”

Xisuma chuckled at how Wels sat promptly in his lap, looking up at him with a snort. Hels copied him, sitting next to him. “Hm, no, I don’t believe so. You’ll need to fix that machine of yours.”

“Well, I uh, need alone time for that. I can’t take care of children at the same time.”

Xisuma nodded, wrapping his arms around the toddlers and standing, carrying both of them while they swung their legs. “Yeah, they’re adorable, I’ll admit, but I don’t have a place to keep em’ nor the time to look after them.” He walked over to Beef, plopping them in his arms. The other stumbled, concern spreading across his face.

“Who do I take them to, then?”

The admin tapped his chin thoughtfully. “I believe Cleo used to be a teacher in her older days, I think preschool might’ve been a part of that? If not, ask Stress or, I dunno, Joe? They seem fit for the task.” Finally, he shrugged. “Anyways, I’ll be off then. If there’s any trouble, you know where I am.” He waved, the knights waving back happily.

“Bye bye Suma!” they said. Xisuma laughed, nodding off to them before flying out of the landing bay. Beef in return huffed.

Why did Wels have to go through with such an idea.

[fakeboitherottengirl]

my 100 ideas

Most of these totally suck but i wrote 100 of them so let me know if any of them sound like something you would read or have any ideas for how to spice them up with blood and gore and how to get the most shock possible out of the idea.  

-Two girls become drifter killers to fund the abortion of father-daughter incest

- Zombies like EDM and converge on a rave, replacing the drugged up crowd with nobody noticing

-human farming and a cannibal restaurant

-girls discover fairies and torture them

-two pageant stars become pro-ana superstars

-people earn points in an online game called “Calligula” by committing crimes and filming them

-A boy befriends a vampire trucker and reminds him of his last mortal love

-mall goths murder a “poser” in the woods

- De sade as a transcript of a hurtcore chatroom

-neighborhood kids who congregate at “dirt Hill” bully a child to death who comes back and haunts them in their teens

-A suicide club starts at a highschool

-Oliver twist remake where they are prostitutes instead of thieves

-A glitch in time leaves a rapist turned into a child and lands him at the mercy of his victim

-killer caterpillars

-Aliens that can only get you if you think of them

-A bulimic girl vomits up a baby

-Monsters live in the sand of a beach

-Experiments done on kids to turn them into weapons

-A pedophile on the run with his victim writes a fake memoir supposedly penned by the victim about murdering his family to escape

-Women storm the white house to torture/kill a rapist president

-An exchange studentl living in germany is called upon by the ghosts of a murdered jewish family to kill the family next door who are descendants of the nazis that killed them

-addicts at the end of the world trying to stay high

-anti-aging cream is made of dead 3rd world babies

-Bigfoot, our protagonist, tries to befriend a group of campers but accidentally kills them all off

-Prtending to be underaged, a girl traps a sadist pedophile in his own BDSM dungeon

-An american pedophile in asia becomes possessed by the ghost of a little girl killed in a brothyl

-a girl mutilates herself in her room in an attempt to look “beautiful” by cutting off all the features she finds ugly

-Satanists overtake a christian summer camp for SRA rituals

-A girl who is being molested’s dolls com to life in order to kill her stepfather, told from the POV of her favorite teddy bear

- A girl falls in love with a ghost who she can only see when she asphyxiates so she becomes hooked on duster

-A mute autistic girl befriends a demon who gets vengeance on her bullies

-Two DID alters fall in love and write love letters to each other in a diary even though they can never exist at the same time, plan revenge on church gardner who abused the host and caused the split in an attempt to be whole

-A child who killed another child is released from prison upon turning 18.  When another child goes missing he must solve the mystery to clear his name with the help of his murder victim’s sister (who turns out to be the real killer)

-An adopted girl, upon turning 18, searches for her birth family only to discover a human puppy mill

-Two little boys abduct and murder another at a carnival and watch the panic unravel as the adults search for him

-A cult leader drives his followers to mass suicide

-A mother and daughter break a murderer out of jail and fight for his affections

-a school adopts lobotomies for problem students

-A human trafficker crosses paths with a telekinetic child

-An adopted girl finds out she is the blood heir to an enormous hurtcore ring

-A woman becomes aware that she is a character in a story and begins fighting the writer, who plans to write her into a tragedy

-a rich girl who has spent her life in a self sufficient high rise accidentally hits a lower-floor elevator button to discover that the zombie apocalypse has been happening for over a decade

-The son of a truck stop stripper living motel to motel comes across a magic pack of cigarettes that each grant a wish when smoked.  In the end he gives his last one to his mom and she wishes he was never born and he disappears.

-An abusive troubled teen camp in the wilderness combats a masked slasher

-Activists free elephants at a circus but are captured by sadistic clowns

-Patient zero of a zombie virus goes around infecting hundreds of people through her work in a fast food chain because she cant take paid time off

-A vigilante caring for her murdered best friend’s infant has to take out a chain of criminals while still keeping up with the overwhelming task of motherhood

-A new club drug goes around the rave scene, highly addictive, eventually turns you into a zombie but so addictive people cant stop using it

-A girl wakes up and lives the same day out 100 times, with each day becoming more gruesome and out of control as she tries to stop the death of her best friend from happening

-A woman with no memories is arrested for involvement in a hurtcore ring

-Teens in a mental hospital after a rash of suicide attempts begin to die in strange accidents around the hospital

-A girl singer rising to fame realizes shes being prepared to be sacrificed by a death cult

-A boy who accidentally murdered his sister as a child becomes obsessed with a local girl who looks like she would have grown up to and stalks her, killing everybody close to her to “get his sister back” for his dying mother

-after trying acid for the first time a college girl is dragged back in time and witnesses the slaughter of the natives by settlers and is taken in by a native family fighting back

-A conscious zombie takes out a white supremecist stronghold

-Teens at a christian youth retreat battle a tentacle monster that feeds on virginity

-A haunted house bonds with the family that it is killing after falling in love with the lonely teenage daughter

-After abuse in the industry, a porn star seeks revenge against the producer who abused her, rendering her infertile

-A little girl who lives in a funeral home forms a bond with a senile old man who believes her to be his dead wife reincarnated

-A cursed school play production where the creepy theater teacher has a deal with the devil to sacrifice the lead girl, who grows a thirst for blood

-Upon puberty a girl starts to gruesomely turn into a mermaid despite her family’s assurances that these changes are beautiful and special

-a homeless prostitute forces her son to be her daughter in order to scam and kill pedophile men

-somebody nearby dies whenever a child sucks her thumb and she tries to break the habit

-after discovering her beloved guide dog is a demonic hell hound who needs human flesh to survive, a blind girl goes about finding deserving victims for him to eat

-A band of punk rockers find themselves set upon by nazis after one is killed at their show, the nazis have super-meth

-Everyday life in a small town is disrupted when the residents awake to find themselves living with grotesque cartoon physics

-A date-rapist catches an STD that turns his penis sentient and against him

-A boy who has never seen the sunlight is identified as a kidnapped infant and returned to his family, who have no idea how to handle his PTSD

-A tween popstar’s lyrics contain satanic messages that make his fans killers they kill their families and go on robbing sprees to afford his concerts

-A prim and proper young woman crosses a zombie-infested city to reunite with her (female) childhood best friend who she is in love with

-A chubby loner girl suddenly becomes an asset to her girl scout camp when it is set upon by monsters that only she knows how to fight from reading about them in horror books

-A kidnapped boy realizes he is outgrowing his captor’s attraction and sets out to eliminate the competition of new boys brought into the house

-A redneck boy and his incestuously abusive brother are the lone survivors of a monster attack on their family farm and the boy has to decide if he wants to help his abuser survive or take his chances on his own

-A school for poor children where children are farmed for their organs for the rich

-a young junkie discovers one day that he has the power to regenerate lost body parts

-An interracial group of rich friends finds themselves lost in a bad neighborhood overnightdurring a full moon where the occupants of the neighborhood come alive as werewolves

-A small Amish-type religious community is completely cut off from the world during a monster attack and carry on business with no idea that the outside world has collapsed other than that they’ve stopped receiving letters and newspapers.  A team is sent out to scout the damage

-A girl who has her driver's license for the first weekend is held hostage as a getaway driver for two sadistic maniacs on their crime spree

-At a sleepover, two elementary school girls decide to kill another

-An ex-amish girl assimilates herself into society right when a monster attack begins to crumble it and must get back to her family to warn them that the world is ending

-Desade’s 120 days rewritten in the modern day hamptons

-a new diet pill causes moths to take up residence in somebody’s digestive system

-a group of white people go to film the “horrors” of a supposedly cannibal tribe, but when their racist notions are false, they force the people to conform to what they expected to find so they have something for their film

-a “murder circus” where participants pay to torture victims runs into a clash with protestors

-fights to the death like dogfighting but with human children

-a young man gives himself up to a sadist to pay off his sister’s drug debt

-A young woman working in the crime scene clean up business tries to shelter her own daughter from the horrors of the world by locking her in their apartment and becoming more and mor agoraphobic

-A home invasion turns the tables when the serial would-be-rapists/robbers break into the home of female vampires

-In the aftermath of the end of the world, a small tribe of hardened cannibalistic survivors now have to face forced assimilation back into society

-Trapped in a building with an active shooter, a group of elementary school kids fight back with school supplies

-An international tour group of study abroad students become stranded in the alps with a snow monster

-a team of serial killers/lovers is put to the test when one of them gets a woman pregnant and decides he wants to quit killing and become a normal person

-A teenage punk with a specialty for giving piercings turns into a back-ally abortionist in a wealthy suburb

-Twins who share a body and each have a head get into a feud over a lover and attempt to separate

-A group of racists find themselves cursed by a flesh-eating virus that starts with a change in skin pigment

-Racists hunting illegal immigrants come up on the wrong side of a desert spirit after destroying water left out by humanitarian groups

-A police force in a poor city is hit with a curse that transform them into flesh hungry pig-monsters and the local youth must take them out to protect their neighborhood

-A massive flood turns into a struggle for survival for a dorm building full of art students

-A woman is convinced that her son, conceived through a rape, is a demon

-A mental hospital during a zombie outbreak

[cinnaminsvga]

Wish on a Fish | Namjoon

→ summary: namjoon’s got fish-shaped pastries on the brain, and you’ve got namjoon-shaped space in your heart. you both learn to make do. → genre: fluff, humor → words: 3.9K → a/n: i had this in my wips since october 2018 and i decided to finish it because it’s loving namjoon hours (but when is it not?) also this was inspired by this galaxy brain quote from the man himself: “ain’t no fish inside”

“Y/N has a crush on you.”

The owner of the voice giggles when Namjoon lifts his head up in confusion, a sticky note with various mathematical equations hanging precariously from his forehead. An unflattering doodle of what appears to be a worm with Yoongi’s face has imprinted itself like a makeshift tattoo from where his cheek had rested upon his notebook. None of that information explains what year he has woken up in, what dimensions he has slipped into, nor why Hoseok has decided to tell him this very unlikely factoid when he was clearly busy with his guilt nap.

[guilt nap (n.) when Namjoon has kept his eyes open for an extended amount of time, to the point where colors start making noise and numbers start looking like letters, so he sleeps in various public places to reboot his brain; hardly ever works but he still tries.]

“Whuzzat?” Namjoon asks, verbose. The sticky note is on its last dredges of stickiness, and Hoseok watches it flop down from its perch and into his friend’s agape mouth. Hoseok plucks it away kindly, but Namjoon doesn’t even seem to have noticed its disappearance.

“You look like shit,” Hoseok replies instead, pulling a chair beside Namjoon and carefully pushing aside what appears to be a glass of curdled milk. Hoseok’s nose crinkles in disgust. “Dude. Was this the milk tea from free Boba Tuesday?”

“Yeah?” Namjoon blinks owlishly. It appears that his brain hasn’t fully awakened yet, because he goes to grab the cup and bring it to his lips when Hoseok saves him by plucking the offending object out of his hands too.

“Namjoon. Free Boba Tuesday was three days ago. It’s Friday evening. This is three-day-old milk tea.”

“No way. You’re kidding,” Namjoon says, peering into the cup and making a startled face at the solidified mass. He jiggles it in wonder, beholding in its jelliness. “Wow. Do you think I could donate this to the bio labs? I heard they were looking for more e. coli samples.”

“Why the fuck would this have e. coli in it? Unless you took a shit in—“ Hoseok begins, but clamps his mouth shut when it looks like Namjoon is about to defend himself. He backtracks, “You know what? I don’t want to know.”

“Why are you here again?” Namjoon grumbles, trying to salvage his crumpled notes by smoothing them with his hands. He rips one of them in half, and he gazes at the mess with the eyes of a defeated man. He sighs. “Look, I’m really busy right now. I don’t have time to get roasted AND study for finals at the same time. You’re gonna have to schedule an appointment with me.”

“As much as I enjoy making fun of your poor hygiene and self-care skills, I have a reason for being here. Like I just said, I came here to tell you that Y/N has a crush on you,” Hoseok repeats, eyes gleaming with mischief. “Heard her talking about you in the labs this morning.”

Namjoon stares at him. Hoseok watches in worry as his friend’s irises start to become unfocused slightly.

“Dude,” Hoseok says, waving a hand in front of him. “Did you hear what I said?” Namjoon thankfully blinks back.

“Yeah. Okay, thanks.” Namjoon finally says, before grabbing his notebook to see where he left off. He doesn’t notice that his notes are upside down when he begins to write gibberish that must only make sense to him. Hoseok thinks he can see the word ‘churros’ somewhere in there, but he isn’t 100% certain.

Namjoon continues, “Do you think the cafeteria is still open at this hour? I don’t think I’ve drunk water in two days.”

“Okay, thanks? That’s all you have to say to my jawdropping discovery?” Hoseok exclaims, pinching Namjoon’s cheek. The Yoongi doodle on his cheek smudges from his fingers, making him appear even wormier than before. “Y/N is in your Chemistry class, right? The one with the serial killer professor?”

“Yeah,” Namjoon hums, scratching out the word ‘churro’ and replacing it with ‘grilled cheese’ instead. The amount of concentration on his face is disconcerting, to say the least. It looks like he’s writing down a grocery list beside his calculus homework. “Professor Kang isn’t a serial killer, by the way. He’s just stressed.”

Hoseok gives his friend a once-over, disbelieving. “Yeah, I can see why you’d defend him. Takes one to know one,” he snorts, grimacing at the pit stains lining his friend’s gray shirt. “Honestly, Y/N must be a serial killer herself if she thinks you’re worth any sort of attraction. You smell like the market, dude.”

“Speaking of, do you know what I want from the market right now?” Namjoon drops his pen, leaving an unfinished doodle of another portrait of wormy Yoongi screaming in terror under the heat of a magnifying glass. Hoseok reminds himself to tell his hyung to lock his doors later that evening.

“Uhh… No?”

“Those silly fish cake things, with the red bean,” Namjoon murmurs, determination set in his jaw. He stands up suddenly, slamming his notebooks closed and stuffing them into his backpack. In his hurry, he knocks over the cup of curdled milk tea all over the library floor, and Hoseok half-expects it to start melting the carpet like acid. “It’s funny though, because why the hell would they shape them like that? Ain’t no fish inside… Why would they try to deceive us like that?”

“Dude, you okay?” Hoseok asks, slightly worried for his friend but not worried enough to feel bothered to stop him from potentially running into oncoming traffic.

“Need a snack. Be back,” Namjoon says, rushing out of the library in a speed uncanny for the long-legged man. Hoseok watches as he reaches the front entrance of the library exit, before he inadvertently stops in his tracks, and looks back at the still seated Hoseok.

Hoseok raises a brow. “You forgetting something?”

Namjoon opens his mouth. Closes it. Scrunches up his face like he’s just released a fart. Then, “Hey. I just rhymed. That’s cool,” he says in awe of himself, before finally making his way out of the library without waving goodbye.

Left behind to contemplate his friend choices, Hoseok heaves a heavy sigh, staring forlornly at the abandoned doodle of worm Yoongi. He shakes his head, defeated. “I tried, Y/N. I really did.”

——***——

Namjoon makes his way to the market, after a quick stop to his apartment for a change of clothes. He had only thought to change when a woman and her young daughter had taken one sniff from his general direction and ran quickly into a nearby shop to avoid his cloying stench. He at least had the decency to give the duo a sheepish look before scuttling off to his apartment in embarrassment.

Now slightly better smelling but not any less sleep-deprived, Namjoon enters the nearby open market with an agenda. He passes numerous food stalls, almost being tempted by the loud aunties to buy every single food product that he can fit into his ink-stained hands. He can’t afford to settle for any other sugary product, not when he already has his eye on the main prize.

His torment does not last long because over in the corner of the street where a long line has formed, he sees the sign for freshly cooked bungeoppang.

He hurries over, almost tripping over his own feet when he makes it to the end of the line. For whatever reason, the entirety of Seoul has also decided that they’d also like to eat some bungeoppang today as the line was over 30 people long. Namjoon glances at his watch, seeing that he only has 5 hours left until his next final and he desperately needs to finish revising the last chapter of his notes.

He sees the stall for hotteok close by where the line is significantly shorter. He’s partially debating on switching lanes and settling for his second favorite treat when he sees a familiar head of hair standing by the bungeoppang stall, seemingly debating the same thing as himself.

It’s you.

“Damn, what a line…” Namjoon hears you say to yourself, gazing longingly at the piping hot red bean goodness. Shaking your head, you sigh deeply, ready to leave bungeoppang-less. You’re just about to walk out of sight from Namjoon when he finally thinks to call out to you in greeting.

“Y/N! Over here!” He calls out, and he wonders if you’ll hear him over the sound of the crowd. Surprisingly, you turn around swiftly at the sound of his voice, able to pinpoint his hoarse voice anytime and anywhere. Your cheeks darken when you see him, apparently blind to the fact that he did not look the least bit decent with his dark eyebags and the telltale sign of dried drool on the side of his cheek. To you, he’ll always look gorgeous, even underneath the dingy fluorescent lights of the night market.

“Namjoon? What a coincidence to see you here!” You greet back, walking towards him with a skip in your step. To the chagrin of the five other people behind Namjoon, you insert yourself beside him and into the line for the bungeoppang. Namjoon doesn’t seem to mind, but that could also be the fact that his brain was running on 2 hours of sleep and three cans of energy drinks, but who can say?

“Same here. Are you here for a pre-exam snack too?”

“Sorta,” you hum, smiling. “I was about to ditch this place for the kimbap place near the Arts building because of this line, but then I saw you here so I guess I’ll brave the wait time with you.”

“Oh, sorry to interrupt you from your plans, then.” Namjoon sounds genuinely remorseful, and you have to force yourself not to coo at his crestfallen face. “I just wanted to say hello, you know?”

“It’s no problem, really. I really did have a craving for some bungeoppang, so it’s not like I’m losing anything. Besides, I miss talking to you, so it’s no big deal,” you say the last part quietly, eyes turning downwards in embarrassment. “It’s just… I haven’t seen you in so long.”

However, you’re not really embarrassed––not quite. It is well known around your circle of friends that you have a massive crush on the Biochemistry major, much to the confusion of everyone who knows you. Not to say that Namjoon was terrible, but when you stop to think about how… out of it he was, it’s kind of hard to imagine why you would want to pursue a relationship with him. Dozens of people have already tried their hand at confessing to him, but to no avail. The dude is as dense as a rock, and perhaps that is part of the appeal to you. You always have been a bit of a morosexual.

Besides, you have an advantage: you’re blinded by a misplaced determination for all things Kim Namjoon. In your eyes, all it takes is a few psychological tricks to get his head out of his ass, and you are set for life. If treating Namjoon like a psychology experiment seems unethical to others, well. Let’s just see who is crying when you eventually snatch his heart and win his hand.

If Hoseok had promised his end of the deal, you know that he’s planted the seed in Namjoon already. Assuming things are going according to plan, then Hoseok should have told him about your not-so-secret crush on him, so Namjoon should be aware of your attraction to him. At a glance, Namjoon doesn’t seem to be treating you any differently, but that could just be his way of being polite. Or, you know. He could also be an idiot. Passing him at the market only means another opportunity for you to butter him up and make him yours.

“I miss talking to you too,” Namjoon replies, dimples showing from how hard he’s smiling. You feel your heart jump up to your throat and fall back down to your ass.

“Really? Could’ve sworn that you’ve been avoiding me. Haven’t seen you in two weeks!” you say accusingly, both as a joke but also for real. The hurt is probably evident on your face, even to the likes of Namjoon.

He pouts ruefully at you. “Aw, you know I don’t mean to. I have six finals this term, and I’m terribly behind because of all the extra-curriculars I’ve had to take. You know I could never avoid you on purpose,” he says, brows furrowed in concern. If that isn’t enough, he pulls the rug from under you by brushing a stray strand of hair away from your eyes and tucks it gently behind your ear.

Unbeknownst to the lanky brunette, his words and actions have caused you to start combusting on the inside with unbridled endearment. How the actual fuck could he say that shit with a straight face? And to your weak and fragile heart? Right in front of your bungeoppang? The nerve of this guy! There’s no way that your feelings aren’t unreciprocated––your plan must have worked!

You take a shaky breath, gathering your thoughts. As much as his words seem like an indication of his feelings, you have to make sure. You didn’t survive all these years as one of your university’s top student researchers without knowing the importance of testing your hypothesis. You need to run some tests first before coming to a conclusion.

“Speaking of avoiding friends… I haven’t seen Hoseok in a while. I miss hanging out with him and Yoongi,” you say as nonchalantly as you can, observing Namjoon from the corner of your eye. Namjoon nods in agreement, stepping forward as the line begins to shorten bit by bit. You can almost see the vendor flipping the cakes in their flat iron griddles from where you stand.

“Me too. I saw Hoseok just a few minutes ago before I left to go here. Haven’t seen Yoongi since that party at Seokjin’s, but that’s about it.”

“Oh? You just saw Hoseok? Did he say anything… in particular?” you ask. You feel sweat beginning to build along your palms, and you have to grasp the ends of your sweater to keep yourself from fidgeting. You wait with bated breath as the boy thinks of a response.

“Yeah actually. He mentioned something about you too––wait, hold that thought,” Namjoon stops himself, and you only realize then that you’ve arrived at the front of the line. He turns to you expectantly. “You wanna order first?”

“Huh?” You stare at him dumbfoundedly, your brain fighting to catch up with your surroundings. It isn’t until you hear the irritated sounds of the impatient customers behind you that you manage to snap out of your trance. “Oh. Right. Yeah, I just want one original flavor please.”

“I’ll have three,” Namjoon says, and neither you nor the vendor says anything about the amount he has ordered. Who was anyone to judge him and his fondness for fish-shaped pastries?

Just as you are about to hand over your own payment to the saleslady, Namjoon shoves a bill over yours, nudging your hands away. You squawk indignantly, your protests bubbling underneath your tongue before he gives you a firm look.

“No buts. I’m paying this time as an apology for ignoring you over school,” he says, grinning. You hear the vendor giggle at the two of you, remarking how cute the two of you are. “Thanks,” Namjoon replies, leaving the change for the auntie as a tip. The flush enveloping your face refuses to die, even as the two of you exit the market together.

“You really didn’t have to pay for me,” you mutter, nibbling the treat and letting the warmth envelope you in the cold weather. When you glance at him, you see Namjoon take a huge bite of his first fish cake, cheeks bulging in what most might have found unattractive. You, on the other hand, have to keep yourself from swooning in delight.

“Of course I did,” Namjoon says, or at least, he tries to. He speaks with his mouth full, but luckily you’ve lived with rambunctious males all your life and have learned the fine art of deciphering words even with chunks of food in the way. He successfully swallows the pastry down thickly, and you have to stop yourself from ogling his throat for too long. “You’re my friend, and I care about all of my friends.”

At his innocent admission, your mood is shot down almost immediately, the icy feeling of disappointment running down your back. You’re just his friend, your brain echoes unhelpfully. Your excitement a while ago had been premature––he had only said those sweet words as a friend. At that realization, you drop your gaze down to the pavement, unwilling to show him your sorrow.

Namjoon slows in his walk, noticing your sulking almost immediately. “Hey, you alright?” he asks, patting your back as the two of you stop at a crosswalk. You force yourself not to flinch at his touch.

“Um. I’m fine. Sorry, I just started thinking about the final I have tomorrow,” you lie, keeping your voice steady. The fact that your plan had failed before it even had the chance to begin makes you wonder why you had even thought you would be able to get Namjoon to like you back in the first place. What is the point, when others have tried before you and have failed miserably? What makes you special?

It’s hard to let go though, not with how gentle and kind his touch is as he smooths his hand over your shoulders, rubbing gently. It’s hard to not fall in love with this gigantic dork, with his wire-framed glasses and his ill-fitting flannel shirt. Hell, even the stupid doodle of Yoongi as a worm on his cheek is cute as fuck. Everything about this stupidly endearing genius makes you want to try and try again, even if failure is just around the corner.

Maybe the biggest idiot at the end of the day is yourself. Love really does make all of us stupid, and you are just another victim of one of Cupid’s arrows. That bow-wielding diaper-wearing man can kiss your ass, you surmise.

“Finals suck, but I know you can do it,” Namjoon says with painfully genuine confidence. You ignore the way your heart seizes, biting the head of your fish cake with much more force than necessary.

The two of you cross the street in silence, your forearms touching occasionally as you get closer to the library. You know that Namjoon is probably going to head back there, so you’re about to say your goodbyes and run to your dorm and sing along to some sad Adele songs when Namjoon’s voice stops you once more.

“Hey. I forgot to say a while ago, but I was just about to tell you about Hoseok before we got our bungeoppang,” he says.

You freeze immediately. In those crummy k-dramas, this is always where the girl gets her heartbroken, you realize. Under the streetlamps of a cool spring evening, with no one else in sight. Just you, him, and the remains of your dignity all over the floor.

You brace yourself for the inevitable rejection that you are sure that will follow. You grit your teeth, already rehearsing the jokes you’ll have to say to numb the incoming pain. You’ll have to pretend that everything Hoseok said was just a stupid rumor, that there is no way that you could ever have a crush on him. The both of you will laugh, with him unaware of the way your heart has begun to crumble into tiny pieces with every huff of air you inhale in his presence. You ready yourself, and you tell yourself that you’ll get over it.

But the rejection doesn’t come. Instead, you’re hit by a freight train.

Namjoon is totally serious when he says, “Hoseok told me it was Friday today and that Free Boba Tuesday was three days ago, but I checked my watch and it says it’s February 20, which is a Wednesday. Do you think he was messing with me?”

You gawk at him. You clear your throat. “I-I’m sorry, but what?”

“I’m not crazy, right?” Namjoon pulls out his phone, showing you the home screen where it clearly says the supposed date today. He points at it, finger trembling with an inordinate amount of vigor. “Am I blind? That says February 20!”

Your heart, which once was ready to burst, slowly reassembles itself with frightening speed when you finish processing his words. No, it is not because you have been reinvigorated with the hope of possibly having your attraction reciprocated, but rather, because you can’t believe you have ever decided to give your heart away to a man who didn’t even know that today was, in fact, April 5. Oh my god.

There is absolutely no need to fear that Namjoon might be swept away by someone else, because only you would be dumb enough to have a crush on someone so absolutely, mind-bendingly, idiotic as him.

“Namjoon?”

“Yeah?” he looks at quizzically, neck tinted a soft pink from the cold. The soft glow of the streetlamps gives him a soft halo as he proceeds to stuff his mouth with a large bite of bungeoppang. He smiles through the fullness of his cheeks, dimples ever-present and endearing as they always have been.

Your mouth opens, then closes. Your resolve to confess to him has long since dissipated, but your adoration for him does not waver in the slightest. All you feel is fatigue and a dire need to snuggle into your warmest blankets and dream about fish pastries and a lanky, bespectacled man. Pursuing Namjoon can wait another day, maybe when both of you are a bit more lucid and free from all your pressing assessments. For now…

“Namjoon, I want you to go home and take some rest, okay? If I hear from Hoseok or anyone that you’re still cooped up in that library, I’ll ban you from bungeoppang for the rest of the semester, is that clear?” Your voice is authoritative, but the tenderness in the way you caress his cheek gives you away. Namjoon swallows his bite, blinking owlishly at your sudden display of gentleness.

“O...okay?”

“Good,” you nod firmly, patting his cheek once more and swiping away some stray red bean on his lips. Your fingers burn where they touch him. You step away from him, heading towards the opposite direction. “See you soon, Joon?”

“Y-yeah?” Namjoon stutters out, still at a loss from your odd behavior. “See you, Y/N.”

When you are nothing but a speck of blue amidst a sea of darkness, Namjoon brings a hand to where your fingers had brushed his lips, tapping against it thoughtfully as he stares after where you had been moments ago.

He smiles to himself, shaking his head. “Nice rhyme,” he chuckles, walking away from the library and towards his own apartment. Even with his mind still foggy with math equations and chemistry nomenclature, his heart still manages to do a flip at the thought of seeing you again soon.

Only two finals away.

[pluviophile-bookworm]

Thoughts/ reaction to AWAE 3x10

So, I mentioned in a post I made around midnight (standard Bulgarian time), three hours before this episode aired, that I wasn’t feeling quite like living and that this episode was one of very few things keeping me alive. Since then, I went through a lot more that showed me life really is worth living, and after a small celebration of my birthday (I’m two decades old, yay not so yay really), it’s finally time to open my last, and, hopefully, best present. 

I’ve been going out of my way to avoid spoilers, which is something I never usually do (bc spoilers can be a lifesaving trigger warning), so I’m diving into this episode 100% unprepared for whatever is to happen. I hope I was right not to spoil it for myself. 

I’m rambling oof  So without further ado, here goes my reaction to AWAE  3x10:

Oh my my, what a start. I never expected this. Even after everything Moira has hit me with, I never expected a cold open to include a crying Winifred. Sure, I didn’t expect her to take it lightly, but, well, it seems just a bit too much to me - coming from her, that is. Other girls, on the other hand... by all means, I am immensely grateful that Ruby got over her crush on Gilbert before this happened. Of course, I am so happy for her and Moody, but even if she hadn’t moved on to somebody else immediately, I’m glad her romantic feelings for Gilbert no longer exist because seeing him get together with Anne, one of her closest friends (they are getting together soon, I know it), would have broken her heart. Was that last sentence too long? I hope not. Ok, moving on. 

So, I understand that Winifred must feel cheated, led on, used and whatnot, and that shows that, for whatever reason, she must really have very strong feelings for Gilbert. I’m not saying she loves him the way Anne does - because no one ever could - but I’m saying that for her to be so affected, there have to be some true and strong feelings. On a semi-related note, though, is the idea of her and Prissy getting together off the table? Because it definitely is still very much there in my head. Just saying.

I cannot believe this, and yet it seems to be true - Gilbert broke off the engagement with Winnie before it happened (good) while still thinking Anne doesn’t love him back (bad, so bad). How do these things happen? He must be very, very sure in his own feelings for her then. I cannot wait for him to find out... but how can he find out? I need answers. I need closure. Now. 

Props to Gilbert for telling Winnie that she is exceptional (true) and deserves to be truly loved (very true). Our boy might not love her, but he cares for her very deeply and it must be awful to watch her cry because of him... I hope they can still be friends. And I really hope Winnie and Anne can be friends one day. 

Did he just promise not to tell anyone he’s not engaged to Winnie for two weeks? Do you realise what this means? If he keeps that promise, it might be too late for him and Anne. And he still doesn’t know that she loves him back, and how can he possibly find out without bringing up the fact that he didn’t propose to Winifred? My, that was some cold open. 

My sweet Ruby... wasn’t it only half a season ago that she was only going to Queens to be close to Gilbert? And now she doesn’t want to go without Moody. I’m happy for her, but she seems to have re-attached very strongly in a very short time. I sure hope she doesn’t get hurt. I mean, Moody wouldn’t hurt her, right?

Anne eyeing Gilbert and Gilbert looking back at her... the room is filled with tension, and yet that between the two of them is of a completely different kind. I want this to be resolved already. 

Diana saying she’ll faint if she turns out to have passed the exams is ironic/ funny on a purely linguistic level. She’s practically saying she’ll pass out if she’s passed the exams, get it? No? Just me?

She got in! People, Diana got into Queens! With zero special preparation. I have no choice but to stan. 

The little smiles Anne and Gilbert exchanged when they found out they tied for first place... it almost looked like they forgot all the tension and were just genuinely happy for each other in that moment... and then there’s the extremely awkward “Congratulations” scene which is just another misunderstanding. 

“Potato light bulbs forever!” Well said, Moody, very well said indeed.

Poor Anne is still so disappointed in Gilbert not giving her any response to her note. Poor unfortunate note never reached him, or else things would be vastly different right about now.

Oh my, oh my, they will be roommates, if you know what I mean. What would I give to see this... unfortunately, there was one spoiler I could not avoid, and it is the very real fact that AWAE has been cancelled. But I really want to  see so many more things. Please, people, we can make it happen! #renewAWAE #AWAES4

Poor Diana. I hope there is a force on Earth that can convince her parents to let her go to Queens.

“It is your future, not theirs.” / “It’s not your future, it’s ours!” Oh the tragic parallel, I can’t even. Poor Diana. 

Ok, Winnie I can take, but Eliza Barry is going on my nerves with her crying. True, Diana did go to the exam by lying about where she was going, and she did one more secret thing that would positively make her mother self-combust (I’m talking about Derry and where is my Derry resolution?), but this is a bit too over the top.

Look at the Cuthberts + honorary family member Jerry picking corn together like a true farming family... how idyllic. Also, Jerry is back! And the looks on his and Matthew’s face when Anne starts talking about corsets is just priceless. I love these two. They need their own spin-off. 

Oh my, Matthew, what are you talking about? Sure, giving Jerry his own room at Green Gables is super heartwarming and, sure, the much missed smile was back on Jerry’s face for a couple seconds, but this is just such a callback to Anne’s original problem with Jerry when both of them first arrived at Green Gables - she feels like Matthew and Marilla are replacing her with him, like they’re getting the boy they originally wanted and she’s out of the family. What a heartbreaking turn of events. 

They’re showing us family after family, and in two out of three so far things have gone bad. I hope this is not the case with the Lacroixes. Hazel just told her son she’s proud of him. It seems like their misunderstandings of the past are water under the bridge and that makes me happy. Just please don’t let this take a turn for the worse.

Hazel being soft with her baby granddaughter is so heartwarming... but I’ve been hurt before and I just hope this scene isn’t giving me a false sense of security. 

Gilbert is alone at Green Gables. What could happen? What did he come for? Oh, I can’t, it’s the pen, you guys! Oh my, he’s writing a note to Anne... oh, the parallels...

“My Anne with an E”... I cannot, I simply cannot with this. I can’t, he’s talking about being engaged to her, calling her his Anne... and he still doesn’t know she loves him back. Boy has finally decided to act on his feelings. Took him some time, that’s for sure. That slate to the head must have totally dimmed his senses in order for him to miss the signs. I wonder what Anne’s excuse is.

I can’t help feeling that Anne has somehow reverted back to her 1x1 self. Getting Matthew a cup of water he didn’t ask for and asking if he needs help with the milkers, and just nervously trying to do any chore just to prove she’s useful... poor Anne. So many years of love and acceptance and found family happiness have been pretty much erased by Matthew’s comment about more or less replacing Anne with Jerry. Why, Matthew? I trusted you.

Their cows’ names are Pride and Prejudice? Doesn’t take much to figure out who gave them those names. But now one of them has been sold to the Andrewses. I just hope they treat her well. My, am I getting worried about a cow I don’t even know now?

Oh Anne, how could you say this? There is no way for any place you’ve been at to go back to the way it was before you. Seriously, Anne has this way of changing the world around her for the better that just can’t not leave a trace in a decent person’s heart. And Matthew Cuthbert sure is one. I know he didn’t mean what he said the way that Anne perceived it. I’m sure there is some explanation.

Oh my, Anne found the note. So far this one is doing better than the first one. And... I spoke too soon. Goodness, Anne, why? You couldn’t just read it, you had to tear it up beyond repair and throw it out the window. Shirbert should be banned for life from writing notes. 

Sure, Anne. Act before you think, think a second after you act. Dammit, smart people can be so stupid!

Anne stinks at puzzles. The way she arranged the words made the note look a totally different size than the original. And she saw it clearly before she ripped the life out of it. 

I just cannot with these two. Gilbert takes Anne’s drunken ramblings about pirates to mean she doesn’t love him. Then Anne rearranges Gilbert’s note, which she destroyed herself, to say he doesn’t love her. Thanks, I hate it.

Poor Diana, indeed. Can’t this episode stop making me suffer? This was supposed to be a nice birthday present. And this is supposed to be the last episode ever? No, guys, we can’t let that happen. I did not sign up for this suffering. 

Just seeing the way Marilla acts around Anne makes it perfectly clear that things have changed dramatically in the last three years, and yet somehow it feels like Anne still doesn’t feel like her place in the Cuthbert family is secure. But I understand her. I fell into a great crisis before going off to college, too. I just hope she gets to feel better soon. Girl has been through so much already. 

What could have made Bash jump up so suddenly and run like this? Oh, I cannot believe it. It’s Elijah. He’s back with John Blythe’s things and it seems he’s repenting. But Bash isn’t having it. Oh my, I knew things would get worse for the Blythe- Lacroixes, too, I was just hoping I’d be wrong. Why is this episode doing this to me?

Right on, Marilla. Talk some sense into Eliza Barry. She’s been needing this for a long, long time. 

“Soar to the highest heights” and “plunge to the deepest depths” - that’s Anne alright. She’s literally had both happen within the same day. Multiple times. She’s a “passionate individual”, after all, if I may use Gilbert’s words. 

This scene with Anne and Miss Stacy is such a beautiful contrast to the way they met. Anne sure wasn’t quite herself that day and I’m glad to see she and Miss Stacy are not just a passionate progressive teacher and a curious, headstrong student - they’re great friends now. 

So that letter Marilla received had to do with Anne’s lineage? I want to know any information about it just as much as Anne does. 

I don’t like it that it’s Matthew who has to be called out on his actions, but I’m glad Marilla is calling him out. Whatever his intentions were, and I’m sure they were nothing but good, what he said took Anne back to square one, only with so much more to lose now. 

This episode has too much crying in it. But now it’s coming from Matthew and it’s breaking my heart. 

Idyllic Blythe-Lacroix family scene in the orchard? Apparently this is not that scene. I see Eljah is still there. And from the way he acted at his mother’s grave, I could tell he truly repents for what he’s done. He just wants to be part of the family. And I want to know how that goes. 

It looks like they accept him in. For now, at least. I hope things can smooth over between them. 

Anne has her hair up... and she’s... is she wearing a corset? Little girl sure has grown up. 

I though Matthew would have that talk with Anne, but it seems like he, too has reverted back to his day 1 personality. What is this? Why are they both throwing their character- and inter-character development out the window like this?

Oh my, look at all the girls, all grown up. What girls, they’re practically women now. All so elegant in their lady dresses and their corsets and their hats. Such a glow-up. Not that they needed a glow-up, but it looks good on them all.

Deaf/ mute representation. I love it. Now more than ever we need a season 4 to expand on the girls’ relationship with Lily. And with curfew, which is “not a suggestion”. But especially Lily. 

The way the girls act in their dorm room just goes to show that even with the lady dresses and the corsets and everything, they’re still teenage girls that just want to have fun. I love these girls. 

I know Jerry doesn’t do all that much in this episode (where is my Derry conclusion?), but I’m just so glad to see that he and his beautiful smile are back. And right now he’s bringing the most important letter of all. And don’t worry, it’s not written by Shirbert, so it’s not getting lost or torn to pieces. 

I cannot with all these Shirbert parallels... at about the same time as Anne, Gilbert gets a life-changing letter, too. He’s going to the University of Toronto. I knew it. 

I just can’t... (gosh, this episode has stripped me of all the ability to can) Delly might have just lost her Uncle Gilby to UofT, but she’s just got her big brother Elijah back.

Josephine Barry... I like where this is going. If we get to also see Cole this time...

Now this is what dreams are made of. He’s there. He’s there and he’s looking as elegant as ever. I missed my boy. I’m still waiting for an interaction between him and my other boy Jerry... and we all know that ain’t happening unless we get them to renew AWAE... we can make it happen. 

I can’t. Once again I’m unable to can, this time because of how amazing Anne looks in this dress. I’ve been waiting so long to see it, and it’s more gorgeous than I could have imagined. Anne is, too. Matthew’s face says it all. Green dress who? No, I mean, it’s still absolutely stunning, but this one is way more Anne in my opinion. 

Why the suspense, Anne? Read it out loud, for goodness’ sake? The lack of background music and the ticking of the clock just make it so much more suspenseful.

See? This is why I missed Cole so much - well, not just this, but this too. His beautiful friendship with Anne, that is. Can you believe he hasn’t seen her in so long and yet he still knows her better than anybody else in that room, and, as Anne said herself, they’re all her family. I need more of their friendship. 

There we have it, guys, gals and nb pals, Matthew’s opening up. It was about time. I’m so proud of my man.

“My Anne”, along with the several times Anne was referred to as their daughter, or Marilla and Matthew as her mother and father... beautiful. I’m literally tearing up. 

So Mrs. Thomas does have information about the Shirleys after all. And while Anne is off exploring the town, her parents are looking for... her birth parents. And they’ve sort of found them in this book, The Language of Flowers. Turns out Bertha was a teacher. Like mother, like daughter. Even if she didn’t have the chance to raise her. 

I’m getting chills. Anne and Winifred... oh my, this is bad. This is a bigger misunderstanding than there has ever been between Shirbert, if that’s even possible at this point. Seriously, for two exceptionally smart girls, these two are dumb. 

Oh dear, Diana in her lady dress and hat looks so much like her mother, it’s scary. Well, that’s if her mother was an educated, brave woman ready to take risks for what she believes in. But in terms of looks... it’s almost creepy. 

Even dressed as a beautiful young lady, Anne is just as clumsy as ever. I love her just like that.

The look on Diana’s face scares me. Poor Gilbert here, a victim of the circumstances, doesn’t know what hit him... and it’s not a slate this time. This is not a school crush anymore. We’re talking courting and marriage here. And Diana, best of friends in the world, has had it with this series of unfortunate misunderstandings between Shirbert. 

Did he just jump off of a moving train or something? That’s right - run, Gil, run like the wind! We’re getting closure on this whole thing after all. I hope. 

Oh my, they’re going to- the time for words has run out. They were never any good when it came to these two. They’re going to kiss!

Wow, that was some kiss! It was like Gil here has been holding this in ever since that slate broke over his head. And I’m pretty sure that’s how it really was. Intense, wasn’t it? And then Anne pinching herself to make sure she’s not imagining this - are you telling me she’s been having fantasies of kissing Gilbert?

Wait, he’s still asking if she loves him back after they actually kissed? I don’t mean to sound like a broken record, but - smart people are really dumb. 

A second kiss? Initiated by Anne? Now that’s the stuff of fanfiction. I may have to pinch myself too to make sure I really saw what I saw. 

“Pen pals?” Pen pals, huh? I mean, as long as they don’t intend to share one single pen and as long as they don’t hand-deliver the letters in the absence of each other... this could actually work.

Diana! And was that Mr. Barry coming to his senses after all?

Spare your steps, Gil! The guy really got on the carriage then right back off just to kiss Anne a third and fourth time - not counting the knuckle kiss, which, by the way, totally counts. 

The Cuthberts (yes, including a certain Shirley-Cuthbert) are going to make me cry... 

Funny that “I look like my mother” is the first thing she wanted to tell Gilbert in her first letter... but, I mean, that’s something incredibly important to her and they’ll be talking about all kinds of stuff, so why not? It’s actually beautiful. 

Sure, I want a fourth season with all my heart and soul, but even if we never get one (which we will), this was the most beautiful finale I could have imagined. 

I mean, there are certainly three things I wanted to see resolved by this finale: (1) Derry’s storyline - they sort of acted like it never happened and I’m not ok with that; (2) Ka’kwet’s family’s storyline - not even mentioned, like they were never there. This is the same kind of erasure that the White Man’s Burden prison school was doing. Not a fan. I demand closure on Ka’kwet’s story. (3) Closure on the Andrews family and Josie - this storyline can't have been introduced just for the sake of talking about abuse, consent and freedom of speech.

To sum up, in this rollercoaster of a season finale we saw: lots of crying - unexpected but justified from Winifred, way over the top by Eliza Barry, devastating by Diana, and heartbreaking by Matthew - bonus: a breakdown by Anne after a disappointing letter, then a tear of joy upon learning about her family; lots of the usual Shirbert stuff - tension, longing looks and misunderstandings; the misadventures of another love note; an overwhelming amount of parallels with varying degrees of subtlety; Diana gets into Queens, Gilbert gets into U of T; Elijah is accepted into the Blythe-Lacroix (mostly just Lacroix now) family; Anne and Matthew erase three years’ worth of character development - then get back on track, luckily; Diana is an absolute queen; a pair of cows named Pride and Prejudice - not actually shown on screen; all the girls looking classy in lady dresses and corsets; Marilla helps get Diana to Queens; Jerry + his smile and Cole are back for the finale; Shirbert share not one or two, but five kisses (counting the knuckle one); pen pals Shirbert.

[clevercatchphrase]

2019 year in review

So… The 2010’s are almost over. Huh. What a decade it’s been. Hard to comprehend how much has changed in 10 years. I can barely believe that I was in high school at the beginning of this decade, and now I’m a college graduate with 2 degrees who’s been working at the same job for the last 3 years. But trying to summarize the past 10 years in a single post is a good way to give myself an existential crisis, so let’s not do that! Instead, let’s just focus on 2019 because there has been more than enough shit that’s happened to me in this year to talk about.

PART 1 OF 2: 2019 AND 2020 GOALS AND RESOLUTIONS

Huh, looking back through my archives, I apparently didn’t make a tumblr post about my goals this year. I definitely had some, though. Lemme list ‘em off real quick, and then we’ll go through them point by point.

1)      Pay off all my student loans 2)      Finish some song comics 3)      Make art for my Redbubble account 4)      Finish the first rough draft/script of a game I wanted to make 5)      Practice ASL 6)      Sew some stuffed animals 7)      Finish some fan fictions 8)      Work on Ghost Switch 9)      AMVs 10)   Do some original writing 11)   Make illustrations for my fan fictions

Okay, first off, the student loans. I was actually SO CLOSE to successfully completing this one bUT THEN MY CAR HAD TO BE A WHINEY PISS BABY AND HAVE ITS ALTERNATOR DIE ON ME WHILE I WAS ON THE HIGHWAY AND THEN A BLOW OUT THREE WEEKS LATER.

GOD, if I had to summarize this year in two words, for me it would be “Car troubles”. I swear I spent more on auto repair in the first third of this year than I ever have just freakin’ OWNING a car. All four of my tires had to be replaced, my alternator failed and my car literally just SHUT OFF while I was driving, and I was barely able to coast into a gas station. Both my front breaks and rear breaks were worn down the metal and I only learned this when my car was barely able to stop after I had to slam the petal down full force!  I went in for an oil change, and they found some problems and then I didn’t get my car back for three days! I don’t even like owning a car! I hate driving! I hate my country’s refusal to provide universal, free public transportation! I NEVER ASKED FOR THIS!

Oh-kay… number 2. Finish some song comics. I didn’t finish any. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t work on them. I have made tiny progress, but that’s certainly better than no progress. One of these song comics I hope to be realizes is going to be a collab with one of my friends. It’ll be a long-time coming as it’s pretty low priority for the both of us, but if anyone else out there was disappointed with KH3’s ending, we’re gonna have ya’ covered… With SONG!

3. Make some redbubble art. I actually did this one! Not in the way I expected, but I added (technically) 3 new designs to my redbubble in the middle of the year. If you like butterflies and dragons, I got some product for you~!

Number 4, finish a script for a game I want to make. I… thought about this. I thought about this a lot, but I never put pen to paper, so… oops. It almost happened! I debated making this my main writing project for NaNoWriMo this year, but ended up having more inspiration for another story. Maybe next year? (god, I hope not. I don’t want to wait a full year just to write something)

Number 5, practice ASL. I just straight up didn’t do this and I only have myself to blame. Still keepin’ up that Danish Duolingo streak, though. 4 years going strong and not a day missed yet.

Number 6, sew some stuffed animals. Again, another one I just straight up didn’t do, but I have an excuse of trying to save money while my car crashed and burned in every other sense except literal this year. Hopefully 2020 will be different. I’ll definitely be able to pay off this last loan within the first half of 2020, and then I can start saving for whatever I want to buy.

Finish some fan fictions was number 7, and I did this! Well, I only finished, 1, but it was a story I’ve been working on for over 3 years, and it came out to over 200 THOUSAND words long, which is the longest thing I’ve ever written, and I’m quite proud of myself. Now that the big story is out of the way, and I’ve gotten into a good rhythm of working on Ghost Switch, maybe I can squeeze in some short writing sessions more frequently. (either that, or just wait for my car to break down again and then go on a writing spree in a pepboys. The lord and the fan fic discord know that’s solely why I finished my other fic this year)

Speaking of Ghost Switch, working on it was a goal this year too, and I did that! I kept it up all year and took a vacation in November and it was wonderful. While the major plot points have been in place since before I started drawing, I still need to script each arc beyond Snowdin, but hey, by the time we get there, it’ll be 2022 so I got time. (Note, don’t do this, kids. Script your stories and comics thoroughly before publishing. The road I’m on is paved with misery and pain and it will only end in tears unless I change lanes soon)

Number 9, amvs. Do people make AMVs anymore? Idk… the last one I made was... Jesus, 5 years ago? (it was a gravity falls/fall out boy crossover, if you were curious) I’ve been wanting to do 2 more for just as long, but in order for me to do that, I’d have to spend time re-watching the shows to find the footage, and then actually edit them together, and I just don’t…. feel like it. Maybe someday, but not any day soon.

10; do some original writing. I did this! For nanowrimo! I wrote the first draft of some original fiction I’ve been planning for a year or two now and it completely sucks! But it’s on paper now and I’m happy. Will I revise and edit it? Sure, but not for a while. I want to let it sit and forget about it and look at it with new eyes months from now so I can be sure I can make it better when time comes to rewrite.

11, make illustrations for my fan fics. Now that You Monster is done, I want to go back and add pictures to it. I didn’t do any this year, but I did keep a list of scenes I wanted to draw, so I have plenty of ideas to do as warm up sketches next year~ I kinda want to stream them~

So, that was 11 goals, and I successfully fulfilled 4 of them! That’s! Not a very good ratio… QmQ So, goals for 2020. Some I’m gonna keep from this year, some I’m gonna drop and some I’m gonna add. In short I would like to,

1)      Finish paying off that last student loan 2)      Put more stuff on my redbubble 3)      Illustrate my own fan fics 4)      Sew at least one stuffed animal 5)      Make an enamel pin 6)      Read one new book a month 7)      Write one page a day/Complete at least one new fan fic 8)      Learn Python or C# for the game I want to make 9)      Finish fully scripting Ghost Switch 10)   Boost my patreon

Most of these I think are pretty self-explanitory, but I’ll go into detail just a bit because I’m on a roll and typing my thoughts helps me feel less alone in the middle of the night when you’re super tired and you know you should probably go to sleep, but the toddler in you is throwing a tantrum and doesn’t wanna go to sleep just yet, but you can’t fight the progression of time either way.

Number 1- I should be able to reach this goal by the end of March. End of June at the absolute latest. Once that goal is met, my secret new year’s resolution will be unlocked as well!

Number 2- I want to put more art of my OCs on redbubble. These OCs are tied to the game I want to make. There’s already some art of them up there, but I want at least one piece for each character.

Number 3- Mostly for You Monster. Embrace the cardinal rule of fan fic and apply it to fan art. If you want to read about see art about certain ideas, scenarios, or what-ifs, you gotta make it yourself.

Number 4- I have 3 potential ideas to sew. One is definitely leagues easier than the other two and will probably be chosen if/when I have the time and materials.

Number 5- This year I got really, REALLY into the idea of making enamel pins. Unfortunately it’s a pretty big investment (like, $350 to make 100 pins you  might not even sell). If this happens, it’ll probably be towards the end of the year, and if I get enough interest. I’m currently torn between making an original enamel pin and one based off Undertale. We’ll just have to see where this goes.

Number 6- Back in 2018 when I paid off one of my many student loans, I rewarded myself by spending over 200 dollars in used books. All these books had a theme; they were focused on dragons because I have a problem. I have not yet read a single one of these books I have bought, and I would like to fix that. I have, like, 20 unread dragon books, and even if I only read 12 out of 20, I would consider that an amazing accomplishment and money well spent.

Number 7- I currently have about 8 different WIPs I could work on. (well, I don’t know if I can even call them wips. More like, a general idea and a title written down.) I want to build good writing habits, and if I can write just 200 words a day, hell, even 200 words a week and just one of my 8 stories done, I would consider this goal met.

Number 8- I’m torn between making my game in unity or ren’py. I know jack shit about both. Ren’py is more user friendly, but unity will allow me more customization. (Lol, can you guess what kind of game I want to make yet?)

Number  9- I really just want the full story to be done and written incase anything goes horribly terribly wrong in my life and I find myself unable to continue making ghost switch in comic form. Then at least I can finish the story by other means, you know?

Number 10- It always surprises me every month when I get that patreon email saying I got paid. Sure, I don’t even make double digits on it, but it still awes me enough to know that people out there like my work enough to throw me a tip. I can’t thank my patrons enough for supporting me and I hope to one day be in such a good place I can update my comic/song comics/writing frequently enough without need for goals or milestones. But until that magical day arrives, money is always a great incentive for anything, I suppose. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 ALRIGHT. PART 2 OF 2: SHIT THAT HAPPENED TO ME IN 2019

Cheesus crust what a year. This year started off great! Back in late January Kingdom Hearts 3 FINALLY released, and let me tell you a little story. Back in the summer of 2006 I was a 13 year old middle schooler with no way of making money other than by doing house hold chores at a rate of 25 cents a task. A few weeks ago, I had a sleep over at a friend’s house and they let me play this weird game called “Kingdom Hearts” and god, I was instantly hooked on it. That summer, I did over 800 chores, enough to earn myself 200$ and buy myself a playstation 2 (just in time for the ps3 to come out, gg me) The only games I had for the ps2 were KH1, 2, Re:CoM and Okami, and I beat them all… except Okami. Miffed that the PS3 wouldn’t allow for backwards compatibility, little 13-year-old me made a promise. I looked myself in the mirror and said “I will not buy the next playstation console until KH3 comes out, AND BOY that was probably a good choice for me to make with my level of gaming. I’m even less of a casual gamer than the average casual gamer, but I have been waiting 13 years for this piece of closure, and I even told my friends and family that “the day Kingdom Hearts 3 comes out is the day I will buy a playstation 4”. My dad apparently thought this was the funniest shit, because he literally took the day off from work that Friday to drive me on base to get the game and console (he thought it would be less crowded than a regular walmart, I suppose). I paid $400 on a ps4 pro while he bought me the game. Again, I have an impecible sense of timing seeing as the PS5 is now right on the horrizion, but just like before, I’m not buying a new console until the next KH game is released. See you in 2045, sony~. While I was at the gamestop on base, I also picked up Okami HD and The Last Guardian. For all of February and even early March, I took my time playing through KH3. And…! It was the best disappointment I’ve ever played. After a month away from gaming, I started The Last Guardian and finished it in a couple weeks. I love trico and would die for him, but trying to get 100% completion on that game is udder insanity. Okami, HD, however… again after a month break after finishing TLG, I started replaying Okami. I think I had only managed to get about halfway through the game before I just… stopped playing it on my ps2 version. I am currently SO CLOSE to getting a 100% on the ps4 version. In fact, I’ve beaten the game. I only (techinically) need 2 more trophies to be done; 1st, escape the water dragon without being eaten, 2nd, I need to beat that dumb stupid race with Kai, in order to get the last bead on my rosary, as well as the top dog trophy. I hate her so much. I hate this race so much. It’s awful and bad.

Flash forward to December! Earlier this month I was at Barnes and Noble, buying myself a planner for 2020. I exit the store and notice that there’s a gamestop across the street. For shits and giggles I go inside to look at their game selection, and I find KH 1.5 and 2.5. Now, my PS2 died a few years back (it just won’t read my discs anymore, I don’t know why) and I haven’t been able to replay any of my other kingdom hearts games since. If you had seen me the day I finished kingdom hearts 3, after the ending credits rolled, you would have heard me say “Man…. I wish I could play kingdom hearts 2 again”. AND NOW I CAN, ALONG WITH BBS which I had never even played yet, but knew the story of. I’ve restarted playing kh1, and I was so happy to hear that familiar music when I booted the game up for the first time. While at the game stop, I also picked up Rime and Tearaway, two games that had looked interesting to me. At the time of writing, I’ve finished Rime and am 25% done with tearaway. Rime was…. An interesting experience. I learned about it through Jacksepticeye’s channel a couple years back and thought the art style was enticing. For a super casual gamer like me, I found the puzzles just the right level of challenging and exploring was a blast! The music gave me VERY strong Princes Mononoke vibes, but the overall story left something to be desired. Overall I had fun, and enjoyed completing this game to 100%. Now for tearaway. Can I just say this game is super fucking adorable? I know the original was on the ps vita and the gameplay there was arguably more diverse and imaginative, but this game is just so fucking cute I don’t care?? ALSO, this game’s sound track is ABSOLUTELY incredible and I’ve only heard the first fourth of it! Listen to The Orchards, Pig Riding, and Gibbet Hill Pilgrimage for a taste of their wonderful beats and fantastic use of string and woodwinds! God, I’m so excited to get some more games in 2020. I’m proud to say I currently own more ps4 games than I ever did with my ps2 (and now the majority AREN’T Kingdom Hearts titles!), and I’m still hoping to play Journey, The Witness, and Abzu before everything becomes ps5.

What else happened to me this year. Oh, I went to a doctor for, like, the first time in seven years. I also had my blood drawn for the first time ever, and the nurse said the most disturbing thing to me while she did it. Now, whenever I get shots, I refuse to look. I did that here. So she thought it would be appropriate to say to me “Can you feel your blood leaving your body?” Lady… You can clearly see I am uncomfortable with what is happening here. Why, of all the things you could say, did you choose to say that. Unfortunately, while my doctor is nice, she keeps wanting to run tests on me, that I just cannot afford with my current salary, and my monthly insurance is about to go up to 200$ a month, so I’ve cancelled my next appointment with them, and don’t plan to go back until it’s absolutely necessary. Capitalism is fun, guys. Preventative healthcare is for wusses.

I started going to a chiropractor on a monthly basis. Story time- I don’t know when it started, but sometime late last November I began to notice that I had a headache that just... wasn’t... going away? And each day it was starting to get a little worse. It made it hard for me to find a comfortable position to sleep, it made it hard for me to be in bright areas or move fast. So I said to myself “Okay, if this headache persist through the month of december, then something is proooobably wrong and I should go see someone about it. And hoo-boy were thing wrong with me. By the time this January rolled around, I couldn’t even stay on my feet for more than a few hours without it physically hurting to just BREATHE. So I started going to this chain called The Joint (A+ name, I know). THey aksed me “How are you doing?” I said “I’m in pain” and they said “We can help fix that!”. I’ve only been to a chiropractor once before in my life a few years back after my freshmen year of college because I began to notice my hips weren’t able to support me? LIke, I would lie on my back, and I couldn’t push my hips up when my feet were flat on the floor. I also couldn’t climb anything steep, because my legs just couldn’t push me up if my knee had to bend more than 90 degrees when I lifted my leg up. (Turned out both my hips were apparently out of place). This time only one of my hips were out of place (which they fixed. they said one of my legs was an inch “longer” than the other because I had been leaning all my weight on one leg when I stand). But two of my ribs were apparently “Stuck” which was why it was hurting for me to just breathe, and one of my shoulders was missaligned too, causing one of my trap muscles to constantly be streched, which was pulling on my skull, and causing the headache. Anyway, after they popped all my bones back into place, I still felt terrible, but by god, that night was the first time in weeks I was able to sleep without a migrane. A chiropractor can’t magically heal your arthritis, or fibro, but I definately think they have merit to keeping your posture good and helping your body with things like circulation. 10 outa 10, would recomend. It’s all the fun of getting your neck snapped without the dying!

Earlier this month I got together with two of my friends and we baked Christmas cookies. It was a lot of fun, as well as a great learning experience. A member of my family has a gluten allergy, so we used rice flour for most of the cookies. We learned this is a bad idea! The cookies will just fall apart! A few member’s in one of the friend’s family have nut allergies. Other friend and I knew this and were careful to avoid cookie recipes with nuts, bUT THEN COMPLETELY FORGOT THAT ALMOND MILK AND ALMOND EXTRACT COUNT AS NUT. IN FACT, ALMOND EXTRACT IS PURE CONCENTRATED NUT JUICE AND WE FELT SO BAD FOR ALMOST ACCIDENTALLY POISONING THE FAMILY.

Earlier this year me and these same friends took a field trip to Hobby Lobby and just dicked around the store for a couple of hours. It was super fun, 11 outa 10, would recommend, a great date idea for your artsy S.O.

Back in May I went to a wedding for the first time in my life. (well, not true, but the first one I could remember) we left at 5am, drove 5 hours to get there, hung out at a zoo and spent the night in a la quinta before the wedding day. I slept on the bathroom floor because my mom was snoring too loud in the main room and keeping me awake, and the rest of the day was just spent me trying to keep myself together because I was pissed off and tired.

Other than all of that, nothing really major happened to me this year. I guess one more thing I’ve tried to do this year is started the process of breaking certain internet addictions so I can use my free time for more personal projects. Seriously, I found myself watching way too much youtube and following blogs that didn’t even make me happy. I had a personal intervention with myself where I sat down and asked myself, “why do you watch these videos and youtubers? Why do you follow these blogs? Do you really enjoy their content? Do you really care? If you stopped watching/following them, would you even notice?” After critically thinking it over, I’ve found myself unfollowing several channels and blogs and suddenly I feel so much happier. I thought I would miss it, but I realized I didn’t really care if I saw their content or not. I wasn’t missing much. And now I feel like I have more time to draw, read and write. If you think you spend too much time consuming and not enough time creating, I suggest you try and de-clutter your internet habits as well. It’s done wonders to un-fuck my headspace.

And… well, that about sums up my year. How are your holidays going? Anything fun, exciting, dramatic happen to you this year? I hope your new year is warm and safe! Good night, everybody!

[mysticsparklewings]

Blue Java Bananya

Well here's something I wasn't planning on making at all! This year certainly started off with a bang!, and not a good one, what with my drawing tablet going kaput on me. But at the very least, thanks to my brother I have a temporary solution. He was able to get his hands on a Surface Pro 3 through work, and after acquiring a stylus I've been working on adapting to it for the time being. It's taking a lot of getting used to, but I'd rather have to get used to this than have nothing at all until next century when I can afford a more proper replacement. Anyway. That whole fiasco just depressed and stressed me out to no end, among other life things. For my birthday, I was gifted a DVD of Bananya, a show about, you guessed it--banana cats like the one I've drawn here. I watched the whole thing (about 40 minutes, the episodes are pretty short) in one sitting, and for that time I was able to forget about everything that was worrying me and just enjoy some cute fruit kitties and simple fun. No over-the-top, save-the-world plot, no complicated character dynamics, no overcoming past trauma, just fun and cute. I knew about Bananya for a while, as a couple of years ago I got my hands on a couple of plushies before I even knew the show existed; I just thought the concept of cat-bananas with velcro peels was adorable. It was only later when I was wondering where they originated from that I found out there was a show, and subsequently that the only way to watch the English dub was on the DVD. (No offense to anyone that prefers subs over dubs; I just have a really hard time splitting my attention between what's happening and who's saying what and trying to read the text. Plus I have a hard time sitting down and just watching a show and doing nothing else; dubbed makes it possible for me to do other things and not have to stare at the screen and hope I can read fast enough.) Since I had bananas on the brain after that and it's a really simple and cute art style, I decided to test out getting accustomed to the Surface Pro that I'd draw a little Bananya OC of sorts. In the show, the bananyas are named more so for the cat part of their appearance, usually, but I wanted mine to stand out a bit more and I'm pretty sure that if they aren't already that eventually, all the default cat-pattern names are going to be canonically taken. So I went and I looked up strange/different types of bananas and discovered the blue java or "ice cream" banana, which has a bluish tint to the peel when it's young, and because of it's vanilla taste and creamy texture, it's actually offered as a healthier alternative to ice cream in areas where it's more commonly found (hence the nickname). And now I really want to try one but I haven't the foggiest idea where I'd find them here in the states. My other option was a red/pink variety and the show already has at least 2 bananyas with pink peels and one with pink on her head, so I took the blue banana and ran with it. (Although upon further inspection, I think the newer bananya episodes they're currently working on that haven't been dubbed yet feature one with a blue banana peel so I may still not be completely unique here despite my efforts.) I went with more of a teal/greenish-blue as opposed to a more "true" blue, since even in pictures while the blue java is definitely blue compared to the average banana, it's not blue like a blue raspberry candy is blue. They're actually a pretty pastel kind of almost mint color-- And suddenly, as I'm typing this I think I better understand why vanilla Tootsie Rolls come in a blue wrapper...are they based on these bananas?? Does anybody know?? --*ahem* As I was saying... The bananas, from what I understand, also lose/fade that blue color as they mature. Which would explain why I couldn't seem to find a picture of a peeled Blue Java banana that had that same pastel-colored peel. But I went with it anyway. (This is a show about banana cats, I don't think we have to be 100% scientifically accurate here.) I also added some black spots to the cat part of my bananya, as I haven't seen a white-with-black-spots one in canon material and I have a bit of soft spot for black-and-white kitties in particular. And while I have had second thoughts that maybe her name should be "ice cream bananya" instead (for the reasons I went over earlier about the real bananas), I ultimately when with Blue Java Bannaya, as it very on-the-nose like the other bananya names, and in a way I think the "java" part fits with the black spots. But that's mostly just because java makes me think of "java chip frappucino" from Starbucks, which makes me think of chocolate chips, which are usually dark spots in cookies...see where I'm going with this? Though on the other hand, the black and white also kinda makes me think of Oreos, which would tie-in with the ice cream thing because usually Cookies n Cream ice cream is made with Oreos or knock-off Oreos, so I suppose it would've been equally fair to name her "Cookie Bananya" or something... Eh, for now, she stays as Blue Java. Or just "Java" for short. It was pretty straight forward to draw her, as I mentioned that the bananya style is pretty simple. Dare I say minimal? The main struggles I had boiled down to the learning curve with the Surface Pro and the new stylus. The pen pressure, maybe obviously, isn't as good as I'm used to, and the disparity between the tip of the pen and where the cursor actually is is different, and I think there's a little bit of lag when I'm drawing but that might be more to do with me having the stabilizer turned up a bit higher than normal in trying to compensate for the other issues. Still, I was at least able to manage for something as simple as this. I am admittedly horrified at the prospect of one of my usual, more complex digital drawings though...learning curves and baby steps... I'm not happy about the tablet situation, but at least the bananya is cute so I can focus on that instead. I do sincerely hope I'm very wrong about how long I'm going to be using this new set-up for though, because the way things are going it's going to be a very long time before I have the option of a better alternative... ____ Artwork/Character © me, MysticSparkleWings I do not own Bananya ____ Where to find me & my artwork: My Website | Commission Info + Prices | Ko-Fi | dA Print Shop | RedBubble |   Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram

[ckcker]

Preparations For a Body That Will Accept Anything

At the 3-story leather bar, I was took with the passing memory of the woman at the suburban street art fair who sold prints of her digital collages which mostly layered closeups of leaves with washed out details of a shiny face or medium shot of a nude body, turned away.  “These are all digital collages made with my original images” she explained.  A lily pad leaf with holes and computerized discoloration was placed over the muscled ass and lower back of a blonde man with his profile clipped in atmospheric glow filters.  I completed the perimeter of her booth, which stood out from the woodworking/practical crafts and cityscape photos on wraparound canvas that dominate these kinds of events. In her space, a nymph-like quality and color palette you might associate with the lives of nymphs predominated, communicating the highest rigor of a paganistic fashion shoot.  She turned to a woman approaching her booth and said “these are all digital collages made with my original images.”  

The 3-story leather bar had its own approach to nature.  Importantly, it was named after an animal, and the animal most critical to the identity of the United States.  Conventional urinals were replaced with a long trough, bringing to mind rustic farm life and the day to day experience of domesticated animals.  High on the priority list of the men filling the space was the task of infinite looking around.  Evaluating a face and body in a swarm of people and occasionally speaking to the face and body evaluated.  This was prime nature: silent looking, but not silent in fact as usually a mouth accentuated the other direction of an eye.  A man approached me leading with his lit phone, “has anyone ever told you you look like him?,” the image of a famous and often arrested young actor on his screen.  “Yes, a few times.”  Being spoken to is obviously less interesting than silent looking in a place like this.  Humans enjoy staring at animals, at vistas, at trees, I won’t accept they abuse with curiosity alone, ahahaha, nature’s voyeur, “I’m gay” I thought, as an older man attempted to place his hand in my pee stream before it reached the piss trough.  Our eyes didn’t meet before I said “no” in the tone of disciplining a pet and jerked my cock away.  I did not want his hand in my pee stream and did not even give myself a chance to think about it.

When I was able to observe it, I observed that my neighbor Rob went out a lot.  I usually preferred to stay in and experienced going out by not moving and then by watching people move for me.  Some part-memorized quote on the longevity of the action movie guided this habit of mine, that action movies remain popular because they convince a viewer’s mind that they themselves are catapulting their bodies then holding a gun sideways, punching a face that deserves it until its new form is noticeable, screaming at an approaching animal villain or rock.  The action movie takes our bodies back to a primeval routine of violent exercise and the bodies react by pretending we did something crucial. My experience of watching men reveal both their well-exercised and freely ignored bodies through a sexual broadcast was equivalent to being in the same room as a TV showing the poorly received 9th season of a popular police drama watched by a cousin I hadn’t seen in 6 years, its audio annihilating the interesting chirps of two sparrows outside the window, that I turn and look at directly only once before I decide it’s time to leave the room.  But in some cases such broadcasts were enough surreptitious movement for my body to feel a moment free from the control of my memory and mind. I noticed Rob coming back at various times: 2:33, 1:02, 1:35, 4:21, always in the AM, 1:56, 3:22, 3:06, 5:10, 2:09.  The men coughed, rotated, considered viewers “weak little faggots who need my cock,” 3:46, 12:47, some laid on their sides for several hours, shirtless but not totally sexual in their presentation, some kinda hesitation in their eyes as if testing the world to see if the world thought them attractive.  I felt shanked by what I interpreted as hints of stapled longing in their faces, all of my senses indicated that I was living in the Koyaanisqatsi of porn.  Keeping secrets in the era of social media is an aggressive method of remaining unshared. Yet the spills from certain years stay sticky and even sometimes find a way to tower over me.  Until they are presented to other people, the gore associated with those lost frenzies remains uncleared, yes, freedom fries mist in freezers past like Chrysippus' ass, who made him laugh to death, mhmm.  

Since there had to be an afterimage to the disappearance of an old life, it had to be this: relaxed by the hands off finesse of fate, I lazily controlled myself to decide there wasn’t any other choice but fate.  Always available to the world was my face, to just hide it with a mask or veil would only bring more charged glances or wild guesses.  To be conceived of as sexy was blood-curdling.  I looked up the plastic surgeon with the lowest cumulative online rating, it was Gabe Jenkins and I called the office.  After hearing a high octave off-phone grunt, a voice said

“Dr Jenkins office?”

“Hi do you” I experienced a brisk intake, “Do you do all kinds of” here I laughed like I was trying to encourage someone I thought of as insecure after they made a difficult-to-react-to joke during a conversation “plastic surgery?”

“Yes we offer a number of options,” they responded without interest.

My lack of response gave the woman some go ahead to list the procedures, “breast enhancement, fillers, nose reconstruction, face lift, buttocks enhancement, some men like the calf implants, pec implants, jaw reshaping.  What are you looking for exactly?”

“I have some — a few ideas.  I” I looked at a long strand of black hair that hung from the stationary ceiling fan and was not mine “want to…look like — is it possible to make my face look older? I specifically would like forehead lines and crow’s feet.  And if there is a way to get my neck to sag lower than it is now that would be great. I am 27, I would like to look at least 78 if possible, hello?”

The voice had interest in it, “please don’t call here again if you are going to waste our time.”

“I am being very serious.  I would like plastic surgery to look older,” and there was silence.  

I considered what I could say to make it real. “Please, I would like the procedures done as soon as possible, there is a big gala I will be attending in Singapore next month” but I fear-laughed and the woman exited.  

I had no thoughts to live for, and then suddenly in a breakthrough moment I discovered that, after many many months, I had a thought: I should slowly begin to get plastic surgery to look older.  Now I needed money to make this happen.  Because then my disappearance would appear more accurate.  With the jowls of a 92 yr old man I would feel liberated.  But that wasn’t enough — I wanted more than anything to reproduce the appearance of a man well over 100.  In fact my thought revealed to me that I was a futurist because I would only settle for looking as old as someone whose life expectancy extended to at least 173.  I wanted to be old in a way no one had yet even imagined.  This would involve a lot of planning, sketching, file-saving and interviewing, and would likely be the type of initiative that lasts an entire life, and I would start with forehead lines.  An ease-in for the body and for the eyes of those that recognized me, and achievable with a budget eyebrow pencil for now.  Keeping costs down was a second thought that entered exactly behind the first thought that appeared after many months.  The eyebrow pencil could also be used for crow’s feet, frown lines, liver spots; but the application of frail sag on my neck, the indistinct recognition of the world suggested by the droop of eyes, the tint play of bald spots under white hair that is shiny and limp, the lowered vocal octave and general bodily slackening were all protruding costs. If I could not formulate, participate in or witness a revolution then I would elect to suffer a much more minor revolution that you might try to call a celebrolution.  As, though the actions and voices that built up the center of what we celebrate as a ‘political climate’ had shifted in an obvious external pivot towards a ‘something totally else,’ it still stood despite the panic that the country needed to focus on the opinions and physical movements of celebrities, and actually not ‘despite’ but ‘because of.’  And plastic surgery was often used by celebrities to command and maintain the public’s focus by recreating a version of themselves they believed responsible for their entry point into wealth and unhinged visibility. Since I was not known for anything and in fact could even be summarized as a loser or more accurately lost, and that I could barely string a sentence together and sometimes ate peanut butter sandwiches and then looked at my hands to discover I had actually eaten an entire pen — this meant my use of plastic surgery could be a revolution in my opportunities. That is, the opportunities that trickle down from achieving grotesque notoriety.  A celebrolution to solve a chunky lil personal puzzle.  

I knew the lines in my palms very well, and so I looked forward to the inevitable submission of lines all over my face because I wanted to know those lines just as well.  I wanted to know them as well as I knew the tone of no worries found in the whoosh sound effect that separates two segments of an entertainment news TV show.  It became a sound I carried with me everywhere, I’ve looked at birds fly past me and heard the sound, communicating that something is leaving.  It gave me a short leak of light, in a moment, and then I could not wait to see what came next.  It was a sound I would need as a score for the before/after of my first forehead-aging and chest droop surgery.  I can definitely say that I’ve had a bird fly past me before.  I simply wanted more free time to formulate a plan for my future appearances, it filled my thoughts all day long. Monetarily I was forsaken, choked out and in need of unbound frondescence.  I never stopped thinking I had some level of luck, I had two lamps, but then there was the job which was just about all I could handle, and, full-time-as-part-time to its core, it tossed me about, took time away from my obsessions, and so I repressed and regularly said ‘yes’ to survive.  At work there was Rachel, who had been entranced by Tom Hiddleston and who first introduced the word ‘clopening’ to me, and Gifford, whose name I could not disassociate from Gabrielle Giffords, and Steven, whose quick rescuing reaction to an elderly customer’s near dive over an uninhibited bag of packing peanuts resulted in the customer’s maximum level of comfort and safety, considering the stakes.  That lack of hesitation in making a decision, and in making the right decision, the most helpful and societally selfless decision, caused me to immediately respect Steven.  So when he found the time to comment on something to me, I tried very hard to engage.  As he explained to me during a lunch break, “The USA does not exist. The White House does not exist. They are using holograms to deceive everyone. God destroyed Earth by fire. And these demon parasites knew it and fled and hid from God and God’s army. Well, they lost. God rules and is in control. Stop watching media. They are lying to everyone. The media all sold their soul to Illuminati demons and are no more. There is nothing more than demons and clones using holograms to run deception. Better wake up. The Heavenly Bodies are right above your head.”  And then he would laugh like he didn’t care if it was true.

[brevoorthistoryofcomics]

I had seen the ads for the new BLACK LIGHTNING series running in DC comics for months before it’s debut--DC really put some marketing muscle behind its launch. However, the first actual issue of the title I would encounter was this one, issue #4, which I bought at my local 7-11. This wasn’t an irregular situation; in particular new DC titles wouldn’t get carried at my local outlet until they’d been around for awhile (a situation that forced me to rely on the good will of my friend Israel Litwack to read NEW TEEN TITANS when it came out, the book only showing up in one specific candy store in his neighborhood for it’s first year-and-a half.)

It’s probably worth relating in this discussion that, as a child growing up in suburban Long Island, I had little-to-no contact with people of color on any sort of regular basis. There was all of one student in my grade school who was black; his name was Alonzo Cook, a fact that I remember only because he was so unique in my experience. Thus, for good or ill, probably the latter, my impression of the black experience was very much formed early on by television, film and comic books like this one. It wouldn’t be until my family moved to Delaware when I was 15 that I’d find myself in the company of multiple African-Americans and get a sense as to what they were really like.

It’s also probably worth noting that writer Tony Isabella created Black Lightning as a replacement for another stillborn series called the Black Bomber, penned by writer Robert Kanigher. Kanigher’s tone-deaf conception was of a racist Archie Bunker-esque Vietnam veteran who had been dosed with an experimental form of Agent Orange while he was in the service, and who would turn, unbeknownst even to himself, into a black super hero who wore a costume reminiscent of a basketball uniform. There was more to it, but when Isabella was handed the materials and asked to salvage the strip, he responded that there was no way to salvage it, and instead he started from scratch and came up withJefferson Pierce.

Having been trained in comic book writing at Marvel, Isabella applied those lessons to Black Lightning. He pulled from across DC continuity for his cast, his antagonists and his background--picking up such diverse elements as the underworld gang the 100, brother of the tailor who manufactured costumes for the Flash’s rogues gallery, Peter Gambi, and Inspector Henderson from the Superman radio show and 1950s TV series. He created his own version of the Kingpin in Tobias Whale, a similarly massive underworld crime boss who also had a preference for cigarette holders. 

I have to say, I really enjoyed this issue of BLACK LIGHTNING, and I would continue to buy the book up to the point where it stopped showing up at my local outlets a few issues later. This issue opens with Lightning in a running battle with the Metropolis police, who consider him a vigilante. Lightning can’t figure out how the cops and the 100 know whenever he’s coming, but when he finds Jimmy Olsen among the officers attacking him, he figures he has a pretty good idea. He kicks Jimmy around a little bit, not really buying his protests of innocence, before making his escape. Watching this, Tobias Whale is ready to unleash a new player onto the scene.

This new player, the Cyclotronic Man is actually a reworking of an obscure one-shot Batman villain from the 1960s, Bag O’ Bones. But now he’s a human reactor, and the 100 have financed his recovery in the hopes that he can kill Superman for them. Black Lightning will just be a bonus. In order to lure the man of Steel into the open, Cyclotronic Man grabs Jimmy Olsen up off the street, flying around the city skies with him. When schoolteacher Jefferson Pierce becomes aware of the situation, he dons his combination afro-mask and his electromagnetic belt and heads out to rescue Olsen. I have to say, I know that it’s stupid as all get-out, but I though that afro-mask thing was pretty cool as a kid, and regretted it when they did away with it.

Lightning manages to crash the Cyclotronic man and Jimmy down onto a nearby rooftop, but in the ensuing struggle, he nearly falls off himself, and is saved in turn by Jimmy. This puts the both of them into Cyclotronic Man’s hands, and he brutally flings Jimmy headfirst into a smokestack before slowly pushing Lightning himself once more off the edge of the roof. But Lightning is able to use the electromagnetic belt whose force-field protects him from bullets to reverse the charge on the field surrounding him, and he’s thus immediately attracted to the Cyclotronic Man, clobbering him.

With the villain down, Lightning goes to help the unconscious and badly hurt Jimmy Olsen. But then, in a scene unfortunately spoiled by the issue’s cover a voice rings out behind him, and he turns to be confronted by an angry Superman, who tells him that if Jimmy is hurt, he’s going to take Black Lightning apart. And so, with this dire turn of events, this issue is To Be Continued. As I said at the start, I thought it was a good read, I liked the idea of a new player in the DC Universe, and I was a convert to the series, at least for as long as I was able to get it.

[kylorenpunk]

Payback is a bitch. Do them all.

“itAy thanks for curing my evening boredom

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

     I think it was my friend Elli during a service project or my friend when we went to the movies (we occasionally pretend we’re a couple when we go to the movies lmao) 

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

    Shy. It was super hard to make friends during grade school. But if you put me with the right people I can be outgoing. 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

     My friend group tomorrow. I think we’re playing smash again? 4. Are you easy to get along with?

     I think so? I have no idea tbh. I know I was a bitch when I was younger though. Hopefully I don’t put off those vibes now 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

     The only time we interacted I was drunk so no lol. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

     Tattooed, nerdy vibes, can make me laugh, nice eyes, idk I just like guys ok7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

     HA. Nope. 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

     Romantically? or friendship? Also bold of you to assume whoever does these are straight. To answer, my friends who are all homies. 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

     Depends on the subject. I am always down to make sex jokes but don’t fucking tell me the shit you did with your SO the other night.10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

      I’m always down for deep convos tbh so I do this frequently. I think the last full length deep convo I had was with Jessica though? 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

      “LMAO” to Joey bc I rick rolled his ass. Bitch apparently I’m always texting you?   12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

       According to spotify it’s: Alexander HamiltonGoodbye Yellow Brick Road (Sara Bareilles’ cover) When I Was Your Man (Aaron Tveit’s cover) The Greatest Show The number one song is one I don’t listen to any more so I’ll replace that with the song I’m listening to “How Far I’ll Go” 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

      God yes. That’s the BEST feeling. 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

      Not really miracles. But I do believe in luck in a sense 15. What good thing happened this summer?

      My birthday. Going to Chicago. 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

      Sure I’ll kiss my mirror again. Sorry y’all I don’t kiss and tell.17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

      Absolutely.18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

      I have had so many I don’t remember my first crush. And I know for a fact I didn’t start talking to crushes till the middle of high school19. Do you like bubble baths?

      No I hate baths. I think it’s gross. 20. Do you like your neighbors?

      I like their dogs. Especially the beautiful pit I get to dog sit 21. What are you bad habits?

      I get very nervous very easily. I’m unsure of myself. I’m also messy.22. Where would you like to travel?

      New York and Europe 23. Do you have trust issues?

      Who doesn’t? 24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

      When I go to sleep.25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

      My stomach. 26. What do you do when you wake up?

      Check my phone. It’s really bad. 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

      Neither. I like my skin color even though I’m pale as fuck. 28. Who are you most comfortable around?

      I’ll have to say my friends Yara and Josephine. Love all my other friends and no offense to y’all I’m just really self conscious 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

      LMAO one basically did the other day. At least he regrets how he treated me. That’s some tea. 30. Do you ever want to get married?

      Hell yeah. Am I currently ready for it? Hell naw. 31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

     She’s too long. I really want to cut her but that costs money. 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

      Chris Hemsworth and Anne Hathaway. Or Vanessa Hudgens33. Spell your name with your chin.

      done. That was strange? 34. Do you play sports? What sports?

      I did soccer for one season when I was 6. I spent most of the time playing with my hair. That was the end of my athletic career. 35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

      TV bc we have netflix and hulu 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

      Tons of times. It’s my brand. 37. What do you say during awkward silences?

      I’ve been doing shitty mouth pops recently. I also start rambling about my day.38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

      Someone that puts up with my bullshit 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

      TJ Maxx. Ulta. Target. I don’t shop often. 40. What do you want to do after high school?

      I’m outta that shit hole. Have been for 5 yrs. 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

      Of course. 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

      I’m listening fully and don’t really have anything to contribute yet. 43. Do you smile at strangers?

      Working at a hotel has forced me to. I hate it. 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

      SPACE MOTHERFUCKERS - the ocean freaks me out45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

      Needing to pee, hunger or work 46. What are you paranoid about?

      EVERYTHING. Mainly the future tho 47. Have you ever been high?

      Nah. Not opposed to it though. 48. Have you ever been drunk?

      Yep. I get really touchy. It’s weird. 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

      Stalk people’s social medias? 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

      Grey 51. Ever wished you were someone else?

      I wish I was Vanessa Hudgens. 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

      I won’t write it here 53. Favourite makeup brand?

      NYX. Cheap and good. 54. Favourite store?

      Target 55. Favourite blog?

      My own. 56. Favourite colour?

      Pink or Green. Depends on the day.57. Favourite food? 

      Anything with pasta or rice 58. Last thing you ate?

      pasta 59. First thing you ate this morning?

      beef jerkey. I have weird cravings60. Ever won a competition? For what?

      For being the world’s most emotional bitch 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

      Hell no. Stay in school kids. 62. Been arrested? For what?

      Nope.63. Ever been in love? 

      Yep. Still don’t kiss and tell. 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

      I know I just said I don’t kiss and tell but this isn’t talking about the person. Wet. Gross. Sloppy as fuck. They were shit at kissing. 65. Are you hungry right now?

      Nah. 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

      I have one tumblr friend. He’s a pal. 67. Facebook or Twitter?

      Twitter68. Twitter or Tumblr?

      Twitter. I’ll make one for this blog soon. 69. Are you watching tv right now?

      No I’m listening to Miss Independent by Kelly Clarkson. 70. Names of your bestfriends? 

      Kim, Michelle, Jessica71. Craving something? What?

      Nothing. 72. What colour are your towels?

      Pink and green72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

      It used to be two until I got a new giant pillow this week. 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

      I have them. I don’t sleep with them. 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

      Four. I just counted. 75. Favourite animal?

      Meerkats 76. What colour is your underwear?

      Pink. 77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

      Vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

      Strawberry79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

      Grey and pink 80. What colour pants?

      Dark grey and green - I’m in house clothes I don’t match 81. Favourite tv show?

      Jane the Virgin 82. Favourite movie?

      Hairspray 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

      Mean Girls. The second one was trash 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

      Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

      SHE DOESN’T EVEN GO HERE 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

      Bruce87. First person you talked to today?

      Joey?88. Last person you talked to today?

      Joey. What the hell. 89. Name a person you hate?

      Hm they don’t need their name here90. Name a person you love?

      My brother91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

      Someone from work 92. In a fight with someone?

      Nah I don’t deal with that bs 93. How many sweatpants do you have?

      None. I do leggings tho ( I think I have 7 or 8)94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

      2 hoodies 95. Last movie you watched?

      The Green Book96. Favourite actress?

      Anne Hathaway? 97. Favourite actor?

      Mark Hamill 98. Do you tan a lot?

      I burn a lot. I’m pale99. Have any pets?

       No 100. How are you feeling?

        Alright. Kinda pumped bc my fav cover of Come Together came on (from the Justice League movie)101. Do you type fast?

        Yes but this is still taking me a while to get through 102. Do you regret anything from your past?

        Hell yeah. No tea is being spilled tho103. Can you spell well?

        If I have a pen and paper I’m decent. 104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

        I miss some ppl yeah. Adulting sucks bc you can’t see everyone all the time105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

        Lol that was the only rebellious thing I would do in high school 106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

        Not that I know of? 107. Have you ever been on a horse?

        Yes I love horseback riding 108. What should you be doing?

        Studying for the GRE109. Is something irritating you right now?

        Boring drama stuff. I won’t go into details. I’ll get over it. 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

        Everyone has. 111. Do you have trust issues?

        Sis you already asked this. Yes. 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

        My mom? I was crying bc I could fit into old shirts 113. What was your childhood nickname?

        Family calls me Kari. Friends call me Rina114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

        Yep. Last month. 115. Do you play the Wii?

        We play Netflix on the wii116. Are you listening to music right now?

        “I am Woman” by Jordan Sparks 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

        Only from a can. I hate soup. 118. Do you like Chinese food?

        Fuck me up with crab rangoons 119. Favourite book?

        Eragon120. Are you afraid of the dark?

        I don’t like not being able to see. So sure. 121. Are you mean?

        I’m a dick to those I care about. Sorry. 122. Is cheating ever okay?

        Absolutely not. Dump their ass. 123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

        Nope. 124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

        I believe in infatuation at first sight125. Do you believe in true love?

         Not sure 126. Are you currently bored?

        I was till I started this 127. What makes you happy?

        anime, superheros, nerdy shit, music and makeup 128. Would you change your name?

        No. I used to want to as a child. 129. What your zodiac sign?

        Cancer. 130. Do you like subway?

        No. It’s gross. 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

        Politely decline132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

        Already answered. 133. Favourite lyrics right now?

        “Yoko Ono, she got that Yoko OnoYou know that shit that made John Lennon go soloKnow that shit gotta be lethalIf that pussy broke up The Beatles” - Jay Z

Murder by Justin Timberlake (Featuring Jay Z)134. Can you count to one million?

        I could. I don’t want to though.135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

        Not sure. 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

        Closed. 137. How tall are you?

        Five foot. Three inches. 138. Curly or Straight hair?

        My hair is wavy. I like both.139. Brunette or Blonde?

        I’m a brunette140. Summer or Winter?

        summer141. Night or Day?

        day 142. Favourite month?

        october143. Are you a vegetarian?

        nope but i’ve considered. 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

        dark chocolate. I’m old. 145. Tea or Coffee?

        tea - coffee gives me the shits 146. Was today a good day?

        It was decent. 147. Mars or Snickers?

        Mars148. What’s your favourite quote?

        “It’s not who we are underneath, it’s what we do that defines us.” - Batman Begins 149. Do you believe in ghosts?

        Yes and No150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou)

         GRE prep book “Directions:” It said more but my fingers hurt from typing all day. 

[iamthewatcheronthewall]

First Lines Meme

RULES: List the openings of the last ten stories you published. Look to see if there are any patterns that you notice yourself, and see if anyone else notices any! Then tag some friends.

Thank you for the tag @thesparkles59 & @drakhus

My last 10 fics include all 8 of my GOT Jonerys stories, plus a ‘Humans’ one-shot and my last ‘Merlin’ multi-chapter.  

I’m really bad at any sort of analysis. In most of these recently multi chapters I appear to drop the reader straight into the action but not always.  Some of them open with dialogue or thought. Anyone else got any thoughts?

I’m late to the party as usual so most people I know have done it.  @kiyasama

@sirmatthew1972 @jillcfan & anyone else I’ve missed who wants a go.

All 10 openers under the cut with links to the works if any catch your eye! ;)

1. The Prince Next Door (WIP multi-chapter)

Sword fighting was nowhere near as enjoyable as Jon had expected. Watching the soldiers train in the main courtyard had always been thrilling and so he had assumed it would be the same once he learnt. Perhaps it would be better when he got a proper sword? This small, wooden one had felt light when Ser Rodrik first placed it in his hand and showed him the proper way to grasp it but, as Robb's sword hit his repeatedly, sending vibrations up his arm, Jon’s shoulders had begun to ache and he found himself wishing he was five again and could return to the nursery to play with his toy soldiers instead.

2. Insatiable Dragon Drabbles (only written one, 100 word drabble so far, so a very short opener here)

She’s breathtaking.

Whilst Daenerys was staring at the cave paintings, Jon was gazing at her. The torchlight flickered off the dark stone walls and the queen’s pale features, making her appear even more stunning than usual.

3. Warg Riders (complete multi-chapter)

He was reliving the Battle for the Dawn, the great northern ice war, the final, desperate attempt to stop the Night King and his army from continuing their deadly march south and destroying the realm.

And it was exhausting.

As a Warg Rider with exceptional sword skills, Jon was effectively having to be two soldiers at once; mentally directing Ghost and his huge pack of wolves and direwolves, whilst also physically fighting as himself; his Varyrian steel blade able to destroy wights and White Walkers alike.

"How can we possibly win this?" he wondered for the hundredth time. 

Every living fighter who died - human and animal - instantly became turn-coat and fought on the enemy’s side and most of the living soldiers held ordinary weapons which required them to 'kill' their opponents many time over to render them ineffective.He felt Ghost bite through another wight, and tried to suppress the now familiar nausea as the taste of dead flesh also filled his mouth whilst, at the same time, Longclaw sliced through another in front of his own eyes. Then, to make matters worse, he received a third point of view, Bran choosing that moment to let his brother know what he could see whilst flying high above in a raven.

"Seven Hells!"

4. Charade (pwp one-shot)

Daenerys took another large swig from her goblet, exchanging a glance with Jon who was sitting next to her at the high table at King's Landing. He rolled his eyes and copied her, obviously feeling exactly the same way about this farce as she did. Tonight would be a whole lot easier if the pair of them were seriously drunk by the time they left the Hall.

And so she was married. Again. This time to Prince Aegon, her nephew and her very best friend although, to Daenerys, he had only ever been Jon and to him she was always Dany. This whole marriage idea was ridiculous in more ways than one. What was it with the Targaryens and their insane need to ‘keep it in the family’?

5. Silent Declarations (complete multi-chapter)

“Why?”

Daenerys paces in her cabin, constantly mumbling the word to herself, even though she isn't entirely sure what question she's asking.

'Why did he bend the knee when I'd already agreed to support him?'

'Why did holding his hand feel like the most passionate of love making?'

'Why did it seem as if he meant something else when he called me his queen?'

'Why does it feel like I'm walking through fire every time I'm close to him?'

Ever since their intimate conversation at his bedside, being around Jon Snow has been delightful torture. She had left his room for very good reason then, overwhelmed by the looks he was giving her and her own unexpectedly strong emotions. So many men have desired her, worshipped her and confessed their love to her but this is different. He is different. It makes no sense how thrilling it feels being close to him.

6. Here Be Dragons (complete multi-chapter modern au)

Daenerys was sitting on a tall stool behind the shop counter studying the accounts; a pen in one hand, mug of coffee in the other and one bare foot resting idly on her largest dog's back. Drogon shifted under her, searching for a scratch, and she did her best to oblige with her toes, far too preoccupied to bend down and fuss him properly. The numbers in front of her barely added up but she didn't really care. It wasn’t as if money was an issue for her, after all, and this new, quiet life was her reward for everything she had gone through before this; a modest flat over a shop full of dragons, fairies, jewellery and magical books. Just her and her three large dogs who were far more than pets to her. They were the loving family she'd never had, the security she had always craved and the honest companionship she didn’t dare search for elsewhere.

They had saved her life. They were her life.

7. Servants of Light (dark one-shot)

Jon rode into the Winterfell courtyard next to Daenerys - closer than necessary, perhaps a little closer than advisable - but his queen might as well have been across the Narrow Sea for all the attention she had paid him since they had left White Harbor.

He knew that the idea of them keeping their distance was a logical one but that hadn’t made their separation any easier for him to bear. And, if it had just been that - the pair of them acting disinterested for the sake of appearances - then he could have coped with such cruel separation, but there was something more going on here. Dany was withdrawn, nervous … scared about something and, no matter how gently Jon had tried to ask her, she would not talk to him about what was on her mind. Would not allow herself to be alone with him at all.

‘It’s for the best,’ he thought, trying hard to convince himself. ‘We do have more important things to think about, after all.’

8. This (boatsex 2-shot)

"Jon Snow's not in love with me," Daenerys declared and yet her heart leapt unexpectedly at the thought.

"Oh, my mistake,” Tyrion countered. “I suppose he stares at you longingly because he's hopeful for a successful military alliance."

Did he really stare at her longingly? Dany thought she had caught that look once or twice, but had just as quickly dismissed it as her own fancy. She would turn towards the King in the North and there, just for a heartbeat, imagined she saw something thrilling in his eyes' dark depths, but then the illusion would quickly vanish, replaced with the impenetrable glower she was now so used to seeing on his face.

9. It’s Just a Little Crush (’Humans’ One-shot)

This was not at all how Mattie had envisaged her reunion with Leo. Although, honestly, what had she expected? She had been so single minded recently - focused on one specific goal - that she'd somehow managed to convince herself that there'd been an element of self-discovery to her search for Odi and the development of the mature code. Some higher purpose.

But she now realised she'd been deluding herself and it had all been for one reason. For one person.

10. A Prison Around Our Wrists (’Merlin’ complete multi-chapter)

“Hurry, Morgana!”

The corridor the three of them were hurrying down was narrow, dark and cold, and her heartbeat thumping loudly in her ears did little to drown out the sound of moans and soft sobs around her. She grit her teeth and continued on, trying not to think about all the others in here, focusing instead on the two warm hands she was holding; one large and one very small.

The metal bracelet around her wrist buzzed viciously, a timely reminder to keep her emotions under control. She took a deep breath to calm herself whilst her companions' hands gently squeezed hers, attempting to give reassurance.

“Nearly there.”

[thejokersenigma]

Joker x Reader - Oneshot Request - The Rat and the Cat

Ok, so this was a request I got quite a while a go, I’m sorry it took me so long to get to! :S

I love your Joker stories so much, thank you for writing them :) if you're not too busy then I'll just leave a one shot idea: Joker finds out the reader brought home a cat and he gets mad, saying he's not a cat person but he can't get rid of it cuz of the reader. He acts like he hates the cat but he secretly pets and cuddles it when he's trying to relax a little.

So, maybe not 100% what you wanted, but I just kind of have a quick bit of fun with this one - it’s not great, but maybe it’s alright enough? If not, let me know and I’ll redo it!

Let me know if you want to be tagged in anything!

REQUESTS ARE ALWAYS OPEN!

MAIN MASTERLIST

The Joker’s familiar snarl curled his lips as he reached for the pistol where it sat in the holster at his side, his eyes ever leaving the fiend in front of him. The insult, the gall of this enemy was beyond anything he’d ever dealt with before. [Y/N] might like them, might try to convince him to give them a second chance, but that was a laughable hope of hers. They’d gone too far this time. He’d call it disrespect, but it felt worse than that.

J aimed his revolver at his own chair where his opponent insolently sat behind his desk in his office. “Bet you didn’t see that coming, did you?” The Joker taunted with a slow, humourless grin stretching his features. “9 lives. 9 bullets.” He growled, “Seems a lot,” He mused, “but it’ll be worth it…”

The cat, who [Y/N] had apparently named Nyx, didn’t seem at all bothered by the loaded weapon now aimed at her head, instead, just regarded J with a lazy, almost bored, expression over the muzzle of the gun, her tail curled around her feet as she sat in the centre of the chair, the end flicking slightly as she watched him.

This was the final insult. The creature had plagued J ever since [Y/N] had decided to bring it home a few weeks ago, insisting to keep it. He knew she would only whine at him about it for months, hold it over his head, so he’d allowed her to keep it if only to get one annoying voice out of his head. Now, however, he’d rather taking [Y/N]’s constant complaining then have this creature constantly under his feet trying to trip him up, howling at him, scratching up his documents and generally just always being there.

J had tried several times to give the brute a well-aimed kick, but he’d always ended up with its teeth and claws embedded in his skin and then [Y/N] coming to its rescue, carrying it away and cooing at it like a baby. J growled out loud at the memory, clicking the safety of his gun. “Time for an extended cat nap...” He muttered darkly, staring back at the creature’s unblinking amber eyes.

“J!” The familiar voice cried from the doorway of the office. J growled in frustration. Bad timing. He rolled his neck in annoyance as he reluctantly dropped the gun. “What are you doing?!” [Y/N] demanded, as she strode quickly into his office.

“Pest control, doll.” He growled moodily, glaring at the cat who still hadn’t moved despite the chance it had been given thanks to [Y/N].

“God, I just can’t let that cat out of my sight without you making an attempt on her life, can I?!” [Y/N] muttered angrily, storming past J to scoop up the bundle of flue into her arms, the creature immediately starting to purr as it rubbed its cheek into [Y/N]’s chest, bumping her jaw affectionately with the top of its head. J grumbled under his breath as he threw his gun down onto the desk, making his way round to his and dropping sulkily down into it as [Y/N] headed for the door with his nemesis.

“Keep that thing outta my office if you don’t want a custom-made scarf, dolly.” J muttered darkly after her.

“If you gave her a change, you might actually like her, J!” [Y/N] sang as she left, not bothering to look back at him as she now left again, the despicable creature staring over her shoulder with its bright eyes at J. That single parting look of triumphant was enough to make J ground his teeth together.

He would find a way to skin that creature.

And it would be alive when he did.

J watched the man drop to the floor behind his desk, teasingly blowing on the end of his gun. It was a shame really, the man, in his time, had been a good money maker – though recently he’d become too risky with too much money – but was much more a shame, J mused, was that Frosty wasn’t here to clean up the mess.

Instead, J had sent him off with the rest of his crew not on jobs to negotiate with a new dealer who’d set up business down in a prime location by the docks. A good asset if some deal could be reached, a good meal for the monsters of the Gotham waterways if it couldn’t.

But, this particularly body would have to wait for whatever further demise was in store until Johnny-boy returned - or at least one of his men that J trusted to have enough brains to handle dumping a body…

It was gonna have to be Frosty.

“Let’s just hope ol’ Johnny-boy ain’t late again,” J muttered to himself, dropping down into his office chair again, “its gonna start smelling like old Croc-o in here real soon…” He muttered, throwing his gun onto his desk as he kicked his feet up next to it and leant back in his chair, content now to lounge in the joy that was taking care of business.

That bubble of contentment was short lived however, being sharply burst when an all too familiar meow came from directly in front of him. J scowled, gritting his teeth as he reached for his gun again, ready this time to finish the deed before [Y/N] could run to the rescue. He dropped his feet to the floor once more and now leaned his tall, slender frame over the desk towards where, on the other side of the corpse - sat as proudly as always - was the cat, Nyx.

As J’s eyes reached it, the cat dropped something from its mouth, then lightly batted it something with it’s foot, pushing the object forward so it lay alongside the dead body. J’s eyes flickered to it, not dropping his gun.

A mouse, from what J could make out. A dead mouse.

“So…” He turned his head back to the cat, “You’re a killer too, hm?” He mused, raising his eyebrows at the feline. Just then, the mouse seemed to leap back to life and make a run for it, but Nyx was on it in a flash, pinning it beneath her paws. J watched as she then shifted her paws, allowing the mouse to escape, but only a few paces before it was yanked back by where its tail was caught beneath Nyx’s claws. The cat then sat back on her haunches, watching the mouse struggle in front of her, occasionally batting it with her spare paw to keep it running. “Ha!” J snorted, sitting back, letting the gun drop in his hand and resting his chin on his hand, eying the cat with interest, “So you’re a torturer, too?” He grinned widely.

The cat meowed again in answer, now striking lethally at the mouse and then abandoning it where it lay, purposefully over the dead corpse - a complete disregard for the life that had been cut short - to make its way to the desk. J lost sight of Nyx for a moment before she then neatly leapt up onto the surface and then lightly sat down, her eyes constantly on J, her tail swishing, almost like she was appraising him. Nyx suddenly seemed to make her mind then though and, without looking away fro J, she reached out a paw to bat the gun next to her onto the floor.

J erupted into hysterical laughter, falling back in his chair. When he calmed down again he pushed his chair then leant forward, his elbows on his knees so his face was almost level with the cat’s. “I’m afraid that’s not all I have, my sweet…” He drawled with a grin, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pen knife he proceeded to flick open. The cat watched the metal curiously and J allowed it to, twisting the blade between his fingers, the light of the office bouncing off it and reflecting onto the desktop. Nyx caught sight of this immediately, transfixed by the slightly flickering shape and sinking into a crouch, ready to stalk her new prey. She lingered in her predatory stance for a beat or two before she made her move, lithely pouncing onto the circle of light.

J fell into a fit of laughter again at this, his movements causing the beam of light to fly across the room, Nyx jumping after it. The Joker continued to tease the cat for a while - thoroughly amused by the harmless predator - allowing Nyx to pounce on the light, seemingly confident she had got it, only for J to tilt the blade slightly and the light appear frustratingly right next to her. He would then send the light and the cat careening across the room in a wild chase, almost forgetting the corpse on the floor or the reason he’d even been irritated enough to shoot him.

J eventually, almost out of breath from laughing at his taunting, flicked the knife closed and replaced it back in his pocket. Nyx paused, looking almost confused for a moment as she glanced around for the spot of light, then seemed to realise it was gone – for now at least – and turned her sights instead to where J still sat. Within a minute, she was back where she had been before, sat directly in front of the Joker, her eyes still studying his pale face with almost suspicion.

This wasn’t particular what J had wanted however, he’d hoped the cat would almost be annoyed at his antics and leave. He tried to ignore her, not particularly in the mood to skin her anymore, and instead busied himself with a pile of cash that sat by the side of him.

It was clear though, that Nyx had a change of heart towards the clown, only pausing briefly before she now stood up again, lightly treading over the papers that littered J’s desk as she made her way over to J’s hands, butting one of them. J grumbled something under his breath, gently batting her away, though she persisted, sitting back and meowing demandingly at him, gently swatting at the hand that waved at her like it was a game.

“Don’t make me get my knife back out, kitty.” J warned, pulling his hand away, giving up trying to shoo the pest, and instead resting his head back on his hand, turning his body away from the pestering feline.

This didn’t seem perturb Nyx though, who now proceeded to wind herself around his arm, rubbing her body affectionately against his sleeve and letting out a rumbling purr. J lifted his head, looking down at the creature in surprise, not knowing that sound to be produced towards him. Did it – did it like him? It was more insane then he was if it was going to take a shine to the psychotic clown who - at numerous times - had considered multiple fail-safe ways to end the creatures life for good - each just as colourful as the next.

The Joker watched the cat, almost fascinated, as he dangled a hand in front of it experimentally, and Nyx broke away from his arm, purposefully walking under his fingers and arching her back into his touch, letting out another purr at the contact. J let his fingers curl into the soft dark fur and almost warily began to stroke along the creatures back, the action almost… soothing.

“I ain’t sayin’ is not there! Um sayin’ I didn’ see nothing!” Marz cried angrily.

An eruption of angry protests broke out against this. Marz had failed. He’d been a scout, a gatherer of information -  some might say the most important part of the mission – or at least they did when that person failed.  

And that’s what he had done.

[Y/N] was the only one at the table who wasn’t trying to fight for a place in the conversation, she couldn’t care less, watching the men around her with a thoroughly bored expression, wondering how long J, at the head of the table, would let this pointless shouting go on for before he told them all to shut it. A quick glance at him told her he wasn’t really paying attention, something else on his mind. Maybe it was the rumour of a rat amongst the men.

Just then, [Y/N] jumped slightly as Nyx landed next to her on the table. She gave the cat a warm smile, glad for the company, and began to stroke her absentmindedly, Nyx arching herself into the touch, purring contently, flicking her tail lovingly at [Y/N]’s cheek. But Nyx also seemed distracted, not sitting and instead barely lingering with [Y/N] before she began to stroll leisurely away and down the meeting table in front of all the arguing men, no care for their raised voices.

“’Ey! Someone get rid of the furball.” One of the men grumbled as it walked past him, the quarrelling slowly fading out as everyone became aware of the cat sashaying amongst them. All the men watched the cat in confusion, not sure what to do.

“Boss?” Someone spoke up, looking for instruction as to what to do. J, however, remained silent where he sat watching the scene, his eyes not leaving Nyx as she looked at each man she passed.

Finally, Nyx stopped, then turned to sit directly in front of a short, balding man, staring straight at him unblinking and letting out a single meow. The man looked thoroughly confused, glancing around anxious at his colleagues, not sure what to do now. “B-Boss?” Tarz – Marz’s brother – spoke up, glancing at J, but the Joker still didn’t speak, watching Nyx as her eyes seemed to almost narrow at Tarz, her tail flicking agitatedly. “B-Boss?” Tarz tried again.

“What’s the problem, gentleman…?” J drawled quietly, speaking to the whole table, “Jumpy over a little cat?” He asked, a slow, wide grin now splitting his face, an idea in his mind it seemed. “Or should I say, scaredy cat?” He quipped with a cruel smile.

Somewhere in the room there was a click of a gun. [Y/N] opened her mouth to protest, but, before she could, J’s own gun was out on the table. “Anyone shoots the cat…” He purred, glancing around the room at each man, “I shoot them…” He promised sinisterly, and numerous men swallowed nervously, glancing around the room in an attempt to work out who had been brave enough to try to pull a gun on the Joker’s cat. “Good…” The Joker praised after no one drew their gun, “Now if everyone would be so kind as to leave…” He murmured quietly, “I’d like a little chat with Tarz here…” Tarz’s eyes widened at this, but no one tried to help him, all the other chairs pushed backwards as everyone apart from [Y/N] departed the meeting.

“Boss, it’s a cat, whattya thi-“

Tarz fell back in his chair, a hole in his forehead. Nyx stayed where she was momentarily, not at all spooked by the gunshot, almost seemingly to want to ensure the man was truly dead before she got to her feet again. She moved past [Y/N], rubbing affectionately against her again in passing, then continued towards the Joker where she proceeded to drop down into his lap, curling up comfortably. The Joker placed a hand on the dark fur of her bac, stroking without much thought to the action, immediately feeling its comforting effect.

[Y/N] smirked at the sight. “You know, you look like a James bond villain.”

J just scowled at her.

Tags for Everything: @nerdybirdyfiz @beautifulbows924 @white-chocolate-mocha-fan @jemjem-chan @arkhamsurviour @angelicshinigami @sheldonsherlocktony @thatwriterizzy

Tags for Joker: @sonyandsam @ivefeltthiswaybefore @inoke

[makesyoubrave]

HIIII first of all I am in love with your stories. You're like the best kajsksjs second of all, for the prompt thing... Maybe... They're friends, but Janis gets jealous and Regina confronts her about it/makes fun of her cause she knows she has feelings for her?

This is the story about how the gang schemes to get Regina to realize/admit she has feelings for Janis. It's kinda messy and pretty stream-of-conscious, but a long thought out story will be coming soon, so here is a messy appetizer to that main course ;) 

Read on Ao3 here

Regina and Janis are friends now. It defies all the odds but they are. And it’s absolute fucking torture for Regina. And not in the way you might expect. It’s absolute torture because now she has to confront things she has been pushing to the side for years.

Janis, though, is kind-of having the time of her life.

It was around September that Janis figured out that Regina has feelings for her, and Janis has been soaking it in ever since. Sure she’d had to process and unpack it with Damian’s help but after that, she realized, until Regina figured out just what was making her act the way she was acting, that Janis was going to milk this experience for all it was worth. Maybe push Regina into action a little.

Janis is over lying to herself and pretending to be something she’s not so that night in September when Damian asked her if maybe she wanted Regina to like her Janis had just stared into the distance for a while before looking at Damian and whispering “well I’m screwed.”

It was true, Janis had lots of feelings for Regina George, and she knew that Regina George had a lot of feelings for her, but she knew she couldn’t push Regina directly or the other girl would lash out or run away (she might have shed her outer layers and reverted back to being a pretty good person but she hadn’t completely changed) Janis knew Regina would have to come to terms with this on her own, she just wanted to speed the process up a bit.

So she schemes. She gets Damian’s help, and then accidentally enlists Gretchen one day when Gretchen comes into the art room to ask Damian’s opinion on her outfit for something or other and finds them next to a chalkboard with the start of a seven-step plan.

Gretchen squeals. She still really wants to make everyone around her happy, though she’s learning slowly how to not get walked on, and how to find self-worth without praise from Regina or Cady. But when Damian shushes a protesting Janis and tells Gretchen the plan she’s 100% in.

“Awwww, I’ve been keeping people’s secrets for years, you think I don’t see how Regina looks at you with those big eyes and the expression of terror?” Gretchen says to Janis when she looks and see’s Janis’ look of utter shock.

Damian cackles.

•••

The first stage of their plan is dubbed “Make Regina notice Janis” and has three parts. The first is to just up Regina’s exposure to Janis and make sure Janis is flaunting what she’s got while Regina is paying attention.

Janis changes her routine at school, making sure that she walks down the hallway going the opposite way from Regina at least twice a day. Regina doesn’t quite strut down the hall the way she used to. She’s not always flanked by Gretchen and Karen because now that there aren’t weird rules and weirder expectations the two girls are free to just walk to their own classes. And the effects from Regina’s tango with the bus have left her in flats instead of heels, and she tires easily.

But the hallway still parts for her like it’s the Red Sea. Regina hasn’t ruined anyone’s life in probably 6 months and she’s been actively nicer to people, but old habits die hard, Janis guesses.

But every day after Homeroom and every day after Lunch Regina walks down the main hall of campus with at least two people with her. It’s usually Gretchen and Karen but sometimes it’ll be Cady, or Damian, or Aaron or even Kevin. Somedays it’d been Janis, but now she makes sure to leave both lunch and homeroom really fast to get to her locker so she can be there when Regina starts her strut down the hall.

It’s a warm fall day when it firsts really works. For the last two weeks Regina has stared at Janis for the few seconds they pass each other, and Janis has either grinned at Regina or said hi, and Reinga has always responded. But on this particular day, Janis starts walking down the hall as soon as she sees Regina. People respect and like her after her stunt in the gym last year and there isn’t a ton of traffic because most people are coming straight from the lunch hall, so she has a pretty clear shot as she shakes off the small lingering nerves and flips her hair over her shoulder and stalks down the hallway towards Regina (flanked by Gretchen and Damian today).

When Regina comes into view, the student body has parted so that it’s only the two of them in the hall, there’s no way Janis couldn’t see Regina or Regina couldn’t see Janis, but as they get closer Janis sets her focus to the space above Regina’s head. Regina, for her part, does exactly what Janis expected; she stares at Janis as she gets closer, and her eyebrows contract when she realizes that Janis isn’t going to look at her.

At the last second, Janis can manage before she’ll have completely passed Regina, she sends her most dangerous and seductive smirk over to Regina and winks, before continuing on.

It takes everything she has to not turn around and watch the reaction, but Gretchen and Damian come over after school and gush for like twenty minutes about how Regina had stopped dead in her tracks so fast Gretchen had barely missed bowling her over by Damian pulling her out of the way. Regina had then stared, eyes wide, at Janis’ retreating form for a good ten seconds before she’d snapped back to the present reality, blushed, and turned, wide-eyed, to Damian and Gretchen who had both pretended nothing had happened.

It makes Janis grin ferociously to imagine.

•••

Regina's on the brink, literally anything seems to have her a complete mess. When Janis laughs, Regina blushes. When Janis grins at her, Regina pales. When Janis walks away, Regina watches. When Janis speaks to her, sometimes Regina stutters or blinks rapidly before she can speak. She finds Janis working in the library, pen in her mouth and she swoons. She finds Janis goofing off with Damian and the mathletes in the parking lot and giggles. She finds Janis playing with some puppies one of the teachers brought in to de-stress the kids and Regina almost faints at how fucking cute/hot it is.

Damian loves the material he has to work with, but he sees that one area has been a little underdeveloped. So he comes up with this idea to play into Janis’ passion. So he plays the long game. He knows that Janis has an art-show right before Halloween and he plans to use that. She’s constantly rushing home after school and holing herself up in her art studio/garage.

He walks up to Regina one day at the beginning of October and tells her he wants to go to the mall and look at shoes. Regina immediately agrees. So after school, they get in Regina’s car and are on their way to the mall when Damian cusses loudly and tells Regina that he left his wallet at Janis’ the night before (which was true, he’d shoved it in the seat of the couch in the garage). She rolls her eyes and turns the car around, driving to Janis’.

When they get there Regina makes to stay in the car, but Damian insists that once he goes in he doesn’t know how long Janis will keep him and she might as well come in with him. Damian almost cackles at how easily and quickly Regina agrees to his flimsy excuse, but he holds it together.

They walk into exactly what Damian had hoped. Janis has soft music with a strong beat playing through her garage and she’s in her painting clothes, shorts, socks, a tank top and flannel (all covered in paint) with her hair tied up at the base of her neck. She’s got paint on her forearms where she’s rolled up her flannel, and she��s got paint streaked on her legs and one green streak on her forehead and one red one on her neck. She’s perspiring a little, but her eyes are focused and intense. She’s stretching when they walk in and Damian glances at Regina out of the corner of her eye and sees the girl’s eyes widen, and her mouth almost drops open. He decides to let it go for a while, and as soon as the tension seems to lean towards growing stale he opens his mouth to speak.

He takes a while fake looking for his wallet and Janis pulls over a stool for Regina to sit as Damian first checks most of the garage and then ventures inside. Janis turns down the music but continues to paint as Regina sits and watches. Janis has to bite her lip to stop her grinning or laughing at the expression deep in Regina’s eyes.

Damian comes back in and guesses he’s pushed far enough, “finds” his wallet and drags Regina, who stops to mumble a soft “the painting is really awesome, Janis” before she lets herself get dragged out.

Damian lets Regina process through the drive to the mall, because the girl looks like she really needs it.

•••

Two weeks later, Janis invites everyone to her art show and Gretchen enlists Karen to work her part of the plan. They approach Janis after school the Thursday before her show (on Saturday) and ask if they can help her get ready before her big moment. Janis looks skeptical, but she’s truly friends with these girls now, so she nods.

“On one condition… you don’t make me wear pink.”

“Of course silly, it’s not Wednesday.”

They stay true to their word, and honestly, they don’t even really alter Janis’ look that much. It’s a pretty formal event, and Janis has already picked out her outfit. They veto the shirt she’d picked, and replace it with a semi-sheer button down from Gretchen’s closet. It goes well with Janis’ silver blazer and silver shoes with her customary black skirt and decorative tights.

Gretchen straighten’s Janis’ hair and pulls it back to show-off the shaved side (freshly buzzed) while Karen focuses on Janis’ makeup. She tones down the eyeliner but gives the girl a sparkly silver smoky-eye and contours her bone structure from naturally-sharp to holy-fuck. She and Gretchen confer and decide on a nude lipstick and they help Janis pick out jewelry. It’s Karen’s idea for her to wear the bowtie, Janis’ idea to run downstairs and splatter it with paint, and Gretchen’s idea to load as many rings onto Janis’ hands as possible (she’s been friends with Regina long enough to know that girl will notice and appreciate the attention being brought to Janis’ long fingers and strong hands).

Regina shows up with Damian, Cady, and Aaron to the art show and she’s flabbergasted. Janis has a section of the gallery that’s all her own and while the gang mostly walks around the whole thing (one of the artists paints animal studies and Cady drags Aaron over there for a good portion of the night) Regina can’t really pull herself from the front right corner of the room where paintings with deep colors and broad strokes and abstract shapes and emotions that spill off the canvas and directly into Regina’s heart live.

Janis had been in the back with another artist and the gallery owner when Regina and the gang showed up and when she exits, Gretchen in her blue dress and Karen in her bubblegum pink one and Damian in his purple suit jacket are wandering around the gallery while Aaron in a navy suit stands with Cady in her dark purple pantsuit looking at a painting of a lion, Kevin and the mathlete dudes goofing off by the door with Shane fucking Ohman and she grins, her life full of amazing people. Then she sees Regina in a white dress with silver shoes. Regina’s facing away from her, staring at Janis’ favorite piece she has in this exhibit. It’s a painting of a figure on the other side of a window, walking towards the window in the pouring rain. It’s all blues and greens and browns and purples and the figure is just open space on the canvas.

As Janis rounds the corner, staring much more at Regina then at her painting, she sees the expression on Regina’s face and something constricts in her chest. She feels like she can’t breathe. When Regina turns towards her and that look is then directed 100% at Janis she stops in her tracks. Regina is looking at her with pure awe and a little bit of something that scares Janis a little. But Janis likes to think of herself as someone who walks towards the things that scare her, not away, so she walks towards Regina.

Regina opens her mouth as if to speak, but she can’t and she just shakes her head. Janis feels herself blushing and she ducks her head.

“I can… uh… I can walk you through it if you’d like?”

It’s a credit to their friends that all of them let them have this moment and wait until Regina looks like she might actually faint before they bombard Janis with praise and hugs.

Regina looks wildly at Damian and then at Gretchen and after they take Janis out to ice cream, Gretchen takes Regina home with her and listens as a wide-eyed and flabbergasted Regina admits that she likes Janis.

Gretchen texts Damian once Regina’s passed out from exhaustion.

“On to stage two”

•••

Damian has to credit most of stage 2 to Gretchen knowing Regina really well. She calls Damian after the art show and tells Damian that now that Regina has admitted that she likes Janis she’s going to throw up a lot of walls.

“She doesn’t think Janis is gonna like her, which is a valid thought, so she’s going to just retreat?” Damian asks.

“Not in the way you might think. It’s like… she’s going to try to pretend that Janis doesn’t really matter to her, but she’s also going to kind-of rip herself apart because obviously, Janis does.”

Damian nods.

Stage 2 of the plan is called “The Jealousy Stage” and they don’t even have to do all of the work.

A week after the art exhibit, Regina, who’s back to full strut, is stalking down the halls, looking to walk past Janis’ locker on her way to English class, when she spots a girl in the grade below them leaning against Janis’ locker.

The girl is a grade B bitch. (Regina gives her a grade B because she’s no Junior-Year-Regina). She’s tall and she’s got freckles and bright green eyes and long brown hair and tan skin and she’s gorgeous, Regina can admit that. And she’s leaning towards Janis and grinning and Janis is fucking blushing.

Regina isn’t one of those people who could blend in and figure out what they’re saying, but she tries her best, slowing her pace and pretending to read something on her phone as she passes. She overhears.

“Your art gallery was so gorgeous, and I just had to meet the artist.”

“Thanks”

“I was wondering if you’d like”

Some dude next to Regina shouts and then almost pees himself when Regina spins on him, murder in her eyes. She softens quickly and rolls her eyes at the sophomore dude who’s on the wrestling team. He scampers off.

“Sure!”

Regina looks at Janis and Janis is blushing deeply and Regina sees red. She’s about two-thirds of the way into a brutal plan to ruin the life of that bitch - Morgan maybe? When Janis notices her standing there.

Morgan or whatever her name is long gone.

“You ok, there Regina?”

Regina stands up straighter. “Fine, was she bothering you?”

Janis looks at her curiously, then smirks. “Nope. See you in History later.” And then she’s gone. Regina is fuming.

She stops the closest junior, this girl who Regina has seen around but honestly cannot remember the name of, she’s on the girl’s soccer team and she shows up to a lot of the parties Aaron throws.

“You’re going to find out what Morgan Michaels wants with Janis Sarkisian by the end of the day,” Regina says with no argument. The girl - Caitlyn - looks at Regina real hard.

“Morgan went to Janis’ art-thingy and was super impressed or whatever and now she wants Janis to paint a picture of her…”

Regina stares at her, shocked.

“I was literally standing right next to them when it happened.”

It’s then that Regina remembers that the doctor’s had said it might take a while for her hearing to get better after the bus. It’d been so long that she’d kind of forgotten what that meant for her ability to hear conversations from a distance away, never having needed that power before, relying on Gretchen.

“Why do you want to know?”

Regina just stares at her and then walks away. (Two months later when a rumor starts spreading through the junior class that Caitlyn is a slut, Regina hunts down the stupid dude who got rejected by her and started the rumor and no one knows what she did or said to him but they do know that he left that day early, crying, and the rumor was squashed by the end of the day.)

•••

Two weeks later when Regina walks into the studio and sees Janis working on a painting of fucking Morgan Michaels, she almost sets the room ablaze just with the power of her eyes. It takes Gretchen’s pleading, Cady’s eye-rolls, Karen’s puppy-dog eyes and Damian’s no-nonsense attitude to get her to tell them what’s wrong.

It’s Gretchen who calms her. “If Janis and Morgan were like… a thing… don’t you think Janis wouldn’t spend every weekend with us and she’d maybe like… even talk to Morgan during the day?”

Regina has to admit that that sounds legit.

“It’s like the basic laws of attraction, Regina, duh.”

They’re at lunch the next day when Cady bites the bullet. “So you and Morgan…”

Janis almost chokes on her food. “Ha! No, that girl may be ridiculously hot and totally into me, but I can’t stand being alone with her for longer than like, twenty minutes.”

They’re all shocked when that doesn’t actually make Regina feel better.

“Yeah, like I’m sure Janis wouldn’t say the exact same about me, or worse.”

Karen pipes up quietly from the corner. “If we’re all just going to pretend the evening at the art gallery doesn’t exist, then why don’t you like… try to hang out with her for longer than twenty minutes and prove her wrong.”

They haven’t seen Regina this determined in a while.

•••

They end up going to a drive-in. A fucking drive-in. Regina won’t admit it but she’s kind of floored by the idea and desperately wishes it was a date. She wishes it, even more, when they’re sitting in the bed of Janis’ dad’s truck on the small couch from her garage that Regina and Janis and Damian had put in the bed early that night. She’s sitting there, far too close to Janis, who is chuckling at the Hitchcock thriller they’re playing that night, and Regina feels overwhelmed by the emotions.

The movie ends and they strap the couch back down and get back in the truck and Regina realizes that sitting in relative silence and watching a movie probably doesn’t count as solid alone time, so she hurriedly suggests they go get milkshakes. Janis grins.

They end up spending much more than twenty minutes together, and when Janis drops Regina off after a night of laughter and teasing and lingering looks, she desperately wants to kiss her, but she doesn’t. Because while everyone else might know that Regina George is head-over-heels for Janis, all Janis can see is that Regina is attracted to her, and she refuses to get her heart broken by Regina George again, so she’s putting the ball firmly in Regina’s court and she leaves.

Regina could scream with frustration.

•••

Aaron throws a party the next weekend and Damian and Gretchen get to work. They coordinate schedules to make sure that Janis gets to the party before Regina, knowing that if they get Janis on the dance floor when Regina enters, that Regina might just short-circuit enough. They’re hoping they’re going to get to stage 3 tonight; actualization. Whereas Stage 1 was mostly Damian’s doing and Stage 2 Gretchen’s, Stage 3, while set in motion by their plotting, is entirely up to the two girls.

Regina gets to the party, opens the door, walks through, grabs a drink, talks with Kevin and the mathletes for a little, says hi to Shane, and then walks towards the room with the stereo. She walks through the doorway and she stops.

In the middle of the dance floor, grooving like she doesn’t care who sees, is Janis. She’s dancing brightly with not a care in the world, a huge grin on her face, wacky dance moves with just the right amount of rhythm. Regina has a flash of imagining pulling Janis close to her and moving to the music, and then she’s back in the moment, watching a care-free Janis dance with Karen and Damian, and she leans against the door-frame and smiles.

“When are you going to stop kidding yourself?” It’s Aaron, standing with a red solo cup, leaning against the other side of the doorframe.

Regina doesn’t even try to deny it, just looks at Janis and back at Aaron. His face softens a bit at the expression on her face.

“I know you, Regina, don’t turn this into some sort of game or scheme. You talk a big talk about not caring what people think, and going for what you want but…”

Regina’s face is pained. “Janis isn’t people… she’s Janis. And I don’t deserve her.”

“Six months ago, I would have agreed with you. But tonight?” Aaron allows his thought to trail off, rests his hand on Regina’s shoulder for a second, and then leaves.

When Regina turns back towards the dancing mob, Janis makes eye contact with her and waves, carefree and happy and Regina rolls her eyes fondly and smirks. Janis keeps staring at her, cocks her head to one side a little and grins. It makes Regina’s heart flutter.

She maintains eye-contact with Janis as she stalks across the crowded room, gets up in her personal space (drowns out Gretchen and Damian squealing in the background) and grabs her by her jacket and pulls Janis to her.

“I would really like to kiss you right now.” She says, searching Janis’ eyes.

Janis grins “Fucking finally” and she lets Regina pull her in. Damian gives himself a round of applause. Gretchen starts tearing up and Karen rushes over to hug her, scared something is wrong. Cady grins and Aaron smiles and Shane and the mathletes whoop from the corner and while Regina rolls her eyes and Janis smirks, they both think... they couldn't have gotten luckier. And then Janis flips them all off and drags Regina outside so they can continue, uninterrupted.

••���

They’re the talk of the school for the next two weeks; “Were you at Aaron’s when Regina expressed her undying love for Janis?” “Dude, watching Regina and Janis make out was like… totally bonkers.” “I really hope they’re happy, but don’t you think that’s a little weird of a combo? Like a year ago didn’t they hate each other?” “I heard Janis Sarkisian put Regina George under a love-spell and now… they’re getting married in Iowa”

Some of the comments are more realistic than others. When Regina George struts down the hall, holding tightly to the hand of her girlfriend, Janis Sarkisian, and kisses her on the cheek when she drops her off at homeroom, she literally could not care less about what anyone has to say; all she can feel, is that she’s finally actually getting her second chance, and she’s not about to mess it up.

[paintedface]

Corner of the Coffee Shop

Prompt: ‘Soulmate’ for @just-some-drabbles ‘s writing challenge! (no summary because the prompt says it all)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2073 words

Warnings: fluff, hardly any angst. 

Notes: Thank you so much to my love @untimelyideasforstories for helping me come up with ideas for this story, you saved my ass <3 I also didn’t proofread this, it’s 10:40pm and I have a French test tomorrow argh

Soulmates, true love, first kisses, those are all things you were told to believe. The first one was real enough, as everyone in the world was born with a permanently inked mark, somewhere on their body. Yours was plainly put into sight, right on the inside of your left wrist. From person to person, their mark differed in handwriting, but it always read the same thing; the date of your soulmate’s birth. Your soulmark was scrawled in a delicate yet slightly messy script, which didn’t really bother you. Your friend could barely read her one, it was that chaotic. But it was the actual words that bothered you, which made you lose faith in having a soulmate that was actually alive.

‘10th of March, 1917.’

Seriously, all your friends had their soulmates within their age group, give or take a few years, but this was insane. 100 years since they were born? You’ve got to be kidding. When you started realising what soul marks meant, you got some concealer and smudged it over the ‘1917,’ and replacing it with a suitable year of birth, like your friends’ soul marks. You hide it from them, but it doesn’t hide the truth from you. Your soulmate is probably dead by now, they’d be 100! Otherwise they’re an old man or woman who’s teetering at the edge of the living and the dead. And while all your friends meet their perfect matches, you’ll be stuck there, either alone or about to be alone. Sure, you don’t discriminate against old people, but how big would that age difference be? Not the best thought.

Smudging some concealer over your mark, and carefully writing a replacement year with some eyeliner, you sling your bag over your shoulder and push open the back door to the cafe that you’ve worked in for at least a year. It’s become a second home to you, and you drop your bag on a table in the kitchen.

“Hey Noelia.” You smile, waving slightly to your friend, pulling your apron over your head.

“Hey Y/N, how’re you?” She grins back, leaning against the steel counter.

“Tired, but otherwise good. Crowded today, or no?” You ask, moving to hug her, being careful to not smudge your concealer on her shoulder.

She pulls away reluctantly, cocking her head. “I think it’s pretty crowded. We’ve got a busy day ahead of us.”

When you step out into the cafe, you can tell that she’s right. Families, couples, every seat filled. But what really catches your eye are two men in the dark, far corner of the cafe. They both have baseball caps on, and are obviously trying to be discreet. One has blonde hair that appears in a fringe from underneath the cap, and also has sunglasses on, despite the fact that he’s inside. The other has long brown hair, pulled into a small bun at the base of his neck. His posture is slightly tense, as if he’s always alert, though his smile is relatively relaxed.

When the blonde man takes off his sunglasses, setting them on the table, your eyes widen, lips parting in surprise when you realise who it is. Captain America, also known as Steve Rogers. That must mean that the man opposite him is Bucky Barnes. You’ve always admired his story, and frankly, the old pictures of him have given you heart palpitations more than once. Even though your cafe is in New York, but you didn’t think that two Avengers would come to where you work.

Looking around, you realise that none of the other waiters or waitresses have noticed who they are. So when Steve catches your eye, and raises his hand, you take it upon yourself to calm your nerves, and walk over. He gives you a broad smile when he notices your shy expression, and you can’t help but smile back, despite your arms and legs shaking.

“What can I get you two, today?” You manage to get out, getting extremely distracted by the fact that Bucky’s blue eyes are really fucking beautiful. It’s like a stormy sky, yet clear and bright. You can feel his gaze on the side of your face, and heat creeps up your neck slowly. Your heartstrings feel like they’re being pulled, but they’re unlike any time you’ve ever had a crush, it’s more urgent.

“A soy latte for me, and one of those baked cheesecakes, they look incredible.” Steve says, and you pull your pen out from behind your ear, trying to get your writing to look at least relatively distinguishable, what with your hands being sweaty and trembling.

“S-sorry, I’m just…” You apologise hastily, as you cross out a failed word, and rewrite it, “I’m just awed by both of you. Your-your stories are incredible, and you’re really damn inspiring.”

Both of them chuckle softly, and you bite your lip shyly. “It’s fine. It’s not every day that somebody says I’m inspiring.” Bucky gives you a warm smile, and you duck your head in embarrassment.

“S-so, what would you like, sir?” You ask, and he tilts his head, looking as if he’s scanning the glass display case of desserts, but he’s constantly side-glancing you, making your cheeks warm once again.

“A long black and a chocolate tart, doll. That’d be great.” He says in a low voice, lips quirking up at one corner, and your heart skips a beat.

“S-sure! I’ll be out soon with your orders!” You squeak, and before you can embarrass yourself more, you turn and head to the kitchen, flustered beyond belief.

BUCKY P.O.V

“Holy shit, she’s gorgeous.” He breathes, as he watches the back of you, going to the kitchen.

“Be careful, Buck, don’t hit on somebody who ain’t your soulmate.” Steve says jokingly.

Bucky sighs, resting his chin in his palm. “She’s setting a very, very high standard for them.”

Steve runs a hand through his locks, smiling at his best friend.

“I’m sure your soulmate’ll be gorgeous.” He assures him and Bucky slumps back in his seat.

“But I’ll be disappointed if they aren’t as awkward and beautiful as her! And I felt like, a connection.” Bucky whines, slinging his metal arm over the back of his chair.

The blonde man snorts, rolling in his eyes. “I forgot how hard it is to deal with a love sick James Buchanan Barnes.”

YOUR P.O.V

Your hands are still quivering as you prepare their food, trying your best not to drop them as you pick them up.

“Be more chill, Y/N. Be. More. Chill.” You breathe to yourself, before exiting the kitchen.

You expertly weave your way through the customers and the other waiters and waitresses, to get to the far corner of the shop. The two super soldiers smile at you, and your heart flutters at the sight of them, especially Bucky.

“H-hi, here’s your soy latte and cheesecake, and here’s your long black and chocolate tart.” You set down the latte and cheesecake, as well as the chocolate cake. But as you’re about to put down the long black, Bucky reaches out to take it from you, offering you a kind glance.

“I’ll take that doll, thank…” He pauses in the middle of his sentence, and you see his eyes drift to your soul mark. You tense, panicking for a moment, wondering if he can see that you wrote down the year of your soulmate.

“Hey, that’s my birthday. Only a different year.” Bucky points out with a lilt to his voice, tapping the inside of your wrist.

Your heart comes to a stand still because oh my god. Oh my fucking god.

Before you can say anything, he takes the cup from you, his sleeve brushing against your soul mark.

“S-some of my f-foundation got on your sleeve…” You stutter, barely audible with your realisation, your heart now pounding faster, now being more like a buzz. Oh lord, if what you’re thinking is right…

“Oh! Sorry, that’s all my…” Bucky starts off cheerfully, but then his eyes widen when he sees what the foundation hid, “fault…” His crystal clear eyes shoot up to stare at you, mouth dropping open as he drinks in the sight of the full date on your wrist. The foundation had smudged just enough for the permanently inked letters to be visible, at least, to him. 

“That’s-that’s my…” He bites his lip harshly, and, locking eyes with you, rolls up the right sleeve of his shirt, till it rests above his biceps. A small delicate date is written on his skin, on the inside of his upper arm. You recognise the handwriting with ease, because you use it. It’s yours. You can barely focus on anything else but Bucky, and the mark. The date, is the very date of your birthday.

Bucky swallows thickly, and whispers, “Is-Is this your birthday?”

You nod slowly, wringing your hands together tightly, as he lets out a heavy breath, sitting back against the chair.

Steve’s eyes are flicking back and forth between the two of you, and if you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he had an invisible bucket of popcorn.

“So…” You duck your head, suddenly shy and self-conscious, slowly rubbing away the rest of the foundation and eyeliner on your wrist. Panic floods your chest, what if he doesn’t want you as a soulmate? What if you’re not good enough? What if…

Your wrist is grabbed by Bucky, and he pulls you into a close hug, tucking his head in the crook of your neck. He lets out a tear stained gasp, and he murmurs, “you’re my soulmate, you’re really my soulmate.”

You can feel tears pool at the edges of your eyes, holding onto him tighter, not believing that your soulmate actually isn’t a physically old man, and instead somebody way out of your own league, in the best way possible. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Steve give you a wide smile and stand up. He heads out of the cafe, and all you can do is just try and comprehend that this isn’t a dream.

“I-I always thought I’d have a gr-grandpa as my soulmate.” You confess after a moment, shutting your eyes tightly.

Bucky bursts out into husky laughter, the sound warming your heart, before he chokes on another sob, pulling you closer into his lap.

“I always thought that I’d die before I’d meet my soulmate.” He pulls away a little, to search your face earnestly.

“I’m not dreaming, am I? You’re-you’re really here.” Bucky’s eyes are red rimmed, and he’s so close that you can feel his breath on your lips.

“Y-yeah, I am. And so are you and…you’re not a grandpa.” You smile through your tears, running your hands down his arms hesitantly.

Bucky lets out a soft chuckle, lifting up his metal hand to brush back a stray lock of hair. “I’ve known you for 10 minutes and I already love you.”

A MONTH LATER

“Barnes! Get out of my room!” You scream, slamming the door shut.

“Wait, Y/N! Please!” He begs through the door, beating the wood rapidly.

“I’m changing! I am fucking NAKED!” You yell, and you can practically see Bucky throwing his head back and laughing.

“Cmon babe, I’ve seen you naked plenty of times!” He whines, and while he’s muttering about how ‘he just wants to kiss all over you,’ you quickly slip on your bra, underwear and beautiful new dress.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, please lock out Bucky.” You say, zipping up the dress, and you can hear the AI confirm your wishes.

“Y/N! You can’t do that!” He screeches, and you dissolve into a fit of giggles, checking your hair and makeup in the mirror one last time.

“Yes I can!” You sing, twirling around and slipping into your high heels. Your eyes fall to the tube of concealer and eyeliner pen in the open drawer of your vanity. After a pause, you shake your head to yourself with a smile, and close the drawer.

“You done yet?” Bucky asks grumpily, and you head to the door, pulling it open. You burst out laughing when he falls through, obviously having leant against the door before you opened it. You catch him, despite him being quite a bit heavier than you, and you press a kiss to his forehead. His mouth drops at the sight of you as he stands up.

“W-wow, you look incredible, doll. Guess I fell for you more ways than one, huh?” He grins, kissing you gently. You roll your eyes, kissing him back before wrapping your right arm around his bicep.

“You don’t look so bad yourself, you utter fuckin sap.”

permanent tags (OPEN): @thecrownedrose / @vibranium-arm / @gallifreyansass / @omalleysgirl22 / @girlwith100names / @buckysinthesinbin / @cameronahugenerd / @imsecretlyromanburki / @megan-atthedisco-blog / @buckys-fossil / @iamwarrenspeace / @sofiathearab / @yikesbuckster / @buckyappreciationsociety / @debbielovesbucky / @metal-armed-dino / @helloitscrowley / @sebastian-stans-thighs / @fantastic-fantasy-fanfics / @natalia–alianovna–romanova / @feelmyroarrrr / @mjuikoli / @meganliiz / @psychicwitchphilosopher / @srgntjbarnes  

(strike through means I couldn’t tag you, sorry!)