#seattleite that you are

[human-sweater-vest]

okay so are we gonna talk about how fionna and cake's world is seattle? the library that simon and betty met at is a perfect dupe of suzzallo library on the university of washington seattle campus and the skyline of the city fionna is living in has the space needle in it. seattle lives rent free in simon's head.

this of course is then INCREDIBLY ICONIC that simon becomes ice king because the most common seattle social phenomenon is called "seattle freeze"

[gatheringbones]

there was something about living in Seattle when that rape/murder in Interbay took place where the one lesbian dragged herself out into the street to die of her knife wounds that made me so fixated on the fact that the perpetrator just. saw them when they were out having dinner together, got angry, and decided to follow them home to punish them for it. I thought about it especially when I met my beloved seven years after the attack and we began to be demonstrably lesbian in public. Seattleites glared at us when we held hands no matter which neighborhood we were in, C got in the habit of trying to keep me from noticing how many people around us looked like they wanted to attack us just because I’d do something like kiss her on the cheek at the bus stop.

it made me very, very sensitive to the idea that there’s a level of control you can exert over lesbians and other queer creatures that will keep them safe from situations like that, that will change how they behave and how they come across to potential perpetrators and prevent those encounters from ever happening.

the thinking goes that if you shame and hound a lesbian into speaking and acting correctly, things like this won’t happen to her, and she won’t cause them to happen to others through her carelessness and lack of political awareness. we control whether or not someone sees us with our beloved at a neighborhood bar and decides to rape and murder us, and shaming, silencing, bullying are the tactics we use to keep us safe.

[wilinorsa]

Me, a Seattleite talking with Minnesotans: So you guys have turkeys that wander through the neighborhoods?! And the college campuses?! But you don't like them? Are they mean??

Minnesotans: No they don't really attack you, I just don't like them because they're big/weird/freak me out

Me, who loves Canadian Geese even though they are objectively urban terrors: Bu....but.... You're telling me you have big funky dinosaurs hanging out, not bothering people who walk close to them...and you think this is a NEGATIVE?!?!

[scarlettgauthor]

See me! Buy stickers!

FYI FOR SEATTLEITES: I will be at the Sugarwall Gallery THIS FRIDAY selling and signing books at TEASE: a playful erotic art show.

I will also be selling some fresh sticker designs, as well as a few reprints of my old burlesque designs. This is my very first in-person author event, and I'm really excited about it!

Hope to see you there!

[saturdaynightghostclub]

The Many Lives of Arthur Llewellyn

You know how sometimes you can look at a person and just know, instinctively, that they came from some cosmic elsewhere? Their face, their clothes, their speech—it all belongs somewhere specific, somewhere other than where they are. Every now and then you come across a time-traveler, an astronaut, a lovelorn Victorian in the body of a twentysomething city-dweller. Your Arthur is one such curiosity, you think. A cursory glance would place him on a street-corner in Greenwich Village, or smoking a cigarette beneath a gas lamp in San Francisco. He’s got that foggy beatnik thing going for him. That he exists among the long-haired, strong-armed Seattleites of 1995 must mean that someone out there in the galactic mist is looking out for you; by all accounts, you should never have met this walking anachronism.

But you did, and against all odds he’s currently sitting at your dining room table and using a set of nail clippers to mend the clasp of a necklace his mother insisted was too broken to continue wearing. He suggested she take it to a jeweler, and her subsequent “Why bother” had riled him up to the point that he insisted on fixing the damned thing himself because, in his words, “Why bother? Why bother buying anything if you’re not going to take care of it? You just throw your clothes away when they get holes?”

“I can feel you staring,” he says now, without looking up. Guilty as charged, you hide your smile behind the copy of Howards End that you’re pretending to read. Maybe he’s a weary ship’s captain, taking meticulous care of what few possessions he has that remind him of his faraway home. Maybe somewhere he’s stowed a pair of red boots, made from fine Spanish leather, for safekeeping until he returns to his aching sweetheart on the shore. Maybe you have an overactive imagination.

Aunt Juley is sick, and Helen won’t come home to the grieving Schlegel family, and won’t she reconsider ending her engagement to Paul? Who cares, when Arthur Llewellyn is carefully slinking toward triumph in the battle against his mother’s gold chain? You turn a page without reading it, your eyes still trained on your boyfriend’s long fingers until, with a soft and disbelieving gasp, he holds the chain up for you to see. The clasp looks brand-new, and even if he did only fix it to spite his mother, your heart flutters with pride—he’s a sensitive one, whether he likes it or not. You happen to know that the necklace was given to Mrs. Llewellyn by Arthur’s father: an emerald pendant, her birthstone. The Llewellyns are not sentimental people (with the exception of their son, that is); according to Arthur, he’s had to practically beg them not to donate his great grandmother’s china sets on more than one occasion. As a consequence, his own apartment is full of antiques and souvenirs he couldn’t bear to see thrown away.

You move closer to him under the pretense of inspecting his work, rising from your chair to stand beside him.

“Very nice,” you say, “are you sure you want to keep going with this teaching thing? I think you’ve got a real future in jewelry repair.”

Arthur tilts his head back to look at you, placing the necklace down on the table. You run a hand through his hair, letting your palm come down to cup his face. He leans into you like a man deprived. You sometimes wonder if his immediate family’s stoicism did a little damage to the part of him that now seems to need your touch like oxygen. “Funny,” he says, “I was thinking the same thing. You think they’ve got good benefits?”

You smile, running your thumb across his sharp cheekbone. He’s been frustrated, you know, in the days leading up to the start of the school year. The school’s curriculum, which he says is “unbearably boring,” leaves little room for creativity, but he’s trying his best. He’s starting his students with The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy this year.

Arthur is flexing his hand repeatedly, probably working out a cramp from his delicate operation with the nail clippers. You perch on the edge of the table, sliding back to a full sit, before taking that hand in both of your own. Slowly, gently, you massage the tension out of his fingers while he looks on in awe. “You want to get out of here?” You ask, “It’s a gorgeous day. Take a walk with me?” He nods, allowing you to lead him out of your apartment and into the midday air, perfumed with lilac and salt.

Your building is on one of those dreadful Seattle hills, the ones you don’t realize are as steep as they are until one day you put on your favorite sundress and realize your calves look absolutely stunning. You lead Arthur up the block, ignoring his halfhearted protests until you’ve made it to the top of the hill. There, he lets his hand go to the small of your back, keeping it there as you continue to walk. After a moment’s silence, he leans over to kiss your temple. “I love you,” he says. Casually, like he has so many times. Like it’s a way to fill the silence instead of a world-bending declaration, like he couldn’t bring you to your knees at any moment with it.

“I love you too,” you say, knowing it carries the same weight for him.

“Can I be so corny for a minute?” He asks, his hand moving gently up and down your back as you walk.

“You can be as corny as you want,” you reply. Never in your life have you seen this kind of earnestness in a man. Never in your life have you even wanted it—never, until you had it.

Arthur takes a deep breath. “I’m really happy,” he says, his voice hoarse, “I’m so fucking happy.”

“Sounds like it,” you tease, nudging him.

“I am,” he finally smiles, “I am. It’s scary though, you know? I’d kind of reached a point where I thought happy was a myth. Or, no—not a myth, I just thought it was something for other people, right? Like, when they’d talk about how happy they were, I thought either that they were exaggerating or that there was something wrong with me, because I didn’t know what they were talking about—does that make sense?”

You stop walking for a moment, turning to Arthur. “You’ve thought about this a lot, huh?”

“Yeah,” he says. You respect his lack of sheepishness. “I’ve had to, you know? It’s like I’m experiencing this whole new facet of human life I didn’t know existed. Like maybe I thought I knew, and you’ve just turned everything upside down.”

You’ve got no choice but to kiss him. There, on the street corner, where it’s nothing short of edenic, you wrap your arms around his shoulders and press your lips to his, hard and sweet. He gasps against you in that way that you love, that way that lets you know you’ve taken him by surprise once again. His shock is only momentary, however, and within seconds you’re wrapped so tightly in his arms that he’s all you can feel, all around you.

“Arthur,” you say, coming down off your toes and letting your hands drag down his chest, “if this is all it takes to make you happy, then neither of us has anything to worry about.”

The boy is grinning in earnest now, eyes fixed on your face. “Oh, fuck,” he says, shattering the illusion that he is anything but a west coast twentysomething, “Jesus, honey…”

He’s running a hand over his face now, like he’s trying in vain to wipe the smile from his features. “What?” You ask, grinning something awful yourself.

“I just saw the future, that’s what,” he says, sweeping you once again into his arms, “I saw my entire life in your face, it’s all you. All you, forever.”

You can’t help but to laugh, a stunned expulsion of joy you weren’t expecting to feel. “Oh god, you’re stuck with me then?”

“There was never anything else in the cards for me, to be fair,” he says, “and just to be clear, I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Arthur’s a bit of a mystic about things like that—souls and stardust and past lives—it took you by surprise at first, but you’ve grown to realize it’s maybe the thing that makes the most sense about him. Of course your out-of-place, out-of-time alien creature of a boyfriend thinks—knows, if you ask him—that the two of you are cosmically entwined. And you, for your part, know that you would rather die than deny him these little fantasies. After all, it’s you who sees a thousand lives in his face, each more complex and profound than the last. Between Seattle and England and outer space and the Pacific ocean, you find yourself hoping against your own iron-clad logic that the two of you will find each other again after this life (and after, and after, and after).

[sivavakkiyar]

speaking as a seattleite, an amazon fulfillment center is not an inaccurate microcosm of the city as a whole

see I feel this and I heard this from a lot of seattleites when I was there. but you all do have a lot of wonderful things; great bookstores, the weather and sights can be beautiful, if you get out of the food scene that thinks the two ideals are 1) replicating Williamsburg and 2) impressing the spirit of Anthony Bourdain a lot of incredible food, including the greatest fast food burger in America, Dick’s…I’m hungry now…I love Dicks…sorry.

I’ll never quite forgive Seattle for adding insult to injury and having the fulfillment center literally on ‘Marginal Way’. Actually you know what I agree with you again

[anghraine]

I know most of you aren't here for my m->f genderbent faves fics, but I also know at least some of you do read at least some of the fics. And I feel like working on one, but am having trouble deciding which to pick! So I leave it in your hands:

Love, Pride & Delicacy is a period-set, slow-burn f/f Elizabeth/Darcy fic.

Daughters of Númenor is an episodic AU where the Númenórean throwbacks in LOTR are genderbent; Aranor/Míriel.

One More Tomorrow is an Amon-centric Legend of Korra AU with f!Tarrlok.

The Lucy Skywalker series is a sprawling AU that is approaching the ROTJ storyline.

The queer Rogue One AU is a series/fic where every member of the core Rogue One team is queer, including a firmly lesbian Cassia Andor.

The fic for The Borgias has mostly unposted scraps about Cesarina's life as a marriageable young woman.

The unnamed modern P&P AU is this AU with lesbian!Darcy/Narcissa as a rich Seattleite.

The Lady of Gondor only genderbends Faramir and is Aragorn/Fíriel/Éowyn.

[mildelectrocution]

Seattleites (Seattlers?), I will be visiting your land soon. If you know Seattle, what's a good place to visit if you are queer and into arts. I've been to left bank books and the Bainbridge museum of art in the past.

I also love your trolls, very beautiful, very powerful.

[totally-a-wizard]

Seattle Weather: Check out this warm weather! Average Seattleite: I think I'll keep a sweater on stand by, we're still in winter. Seattle Weather: Don't you trust me? [Holding an ice and hail gun behind its back]

[fiercynn]

indigenous peoples' day: don't just acknowledge land

it's indigenous peoples' day in many places around the united states, including my hometown of seattle! if you live in the u.s., please make this a day where you don't just symbolically acknowledge indigenous people, but support them materially with reparations and other forms of concrete support.

for seattleites and or others nearby who live on the lands of the duwamish tribe, past and present (or anyone else who wants to support the duwamish):

PAY RENT (aka reparations) to the duwamish tribe

SIGN THE PETITION for federal recognition of the tribe and call on your elected officials to support

ENDORSE the petition for federal recognition if you can speak on behalf of an organization, allied tribe, or elected official

VISIT the duwamish longhouse and cultural center in person if you are local (they have events as well)

SHOP at the longhouse or their online store

ACKNOWLEDGE THE LAND but make sure to include links to the real rent website and/or actions people can take so that your land acknowledgment isn't empty

EDUCATE YOURSELF about the tribe's past and present, their fight for federal recognition and lawsuit, their environmental justice work, and more

SPREAD THE WORD - you can use artwork and flyers they've developed for advocacy purposes

if you live somewhere else, find out whose land you live on, and then look into how you can take similar actions to support indigenous people and tribes in your area.

don't let you acknowledgment of indigenous peoples' day be passive. do what you can to uplift the self-determination of indigenous peoples like the duwamish tribe!

[queenlua]

“Gotta love the fauxgressive environmentalist virtue-signaling here when you didn’t even ask if I’d already signed up my eaglets for pickleball camp there this summer. Our blue heron neighbors had signed up their chicks too,” said bald eagle Ben Picklin, paddles in talon. “I just wish all these heroes actually asked the birds they’re supposedly saving what we thought first before acting like our lord and savior here. We’re no chicken wings — I’m a banger myself with a pretty mean body shot and Nasty Nelson. Pfft, ‘America’s a democracy’—my feathery ass it is!”

[holyshonks]

Worldbuilding tidbits for the Don't Go universe

While I was preparing to write this story, there were certain aspects of the Halo universe I fleshed out for the purposes of this series. Most of it is grounded in at least some things we know about the canon Halo universe. It was a lot of fun to do, so I thought I'd put it down somewhere.

The Foster Care System

By the end of the Human-Covenant war, humanity's numbers were cut in half. In half. That is an insane amount of lives lost. Though this story does not take place during a time when the main character, Julia, was in foster care, she is an orphan and a product of the foster care system, and it plays a huge part in her characterization. Like in our current, actual universe, the foster care system in Halo is fucked. One thing that I took directly from canon is that children who don't get adopted are expected to join the UNSC to "earn" their way out of the system. Julia avoids this by running away, a common, overlooked occurrence. I further extrapolated that, when evacuating a planet, there is an emphasis on rescuing children first. This means that many planets in the outer colonies are almost entirely inhabited by young people, as most older people perished during a Covenant invasion. Ships full of a crush of unaccompanied minors would arrive at a planet's doorstep. To incentivize planets to accept these children, the UNSC would award a grant for every child accepted. This led to a bloated, disorganized system, rife for exploitation by governments who accepted children they were not prepared to care for. The neglect created a generation of orphans who grew up poor and struggling. Many fell through the cracks. Anyone who was not finally lured into the UNSC typically took on a series of side gigs to hustle out a living, some above-board, some not.

2. Civilian Understanding of the Human-Covenant War

It took me a while to come to a conclusion about how much the average human civilian knew about the Covenant and their motivations. From what I can tell, it seems to boil down to: not much. Human schools curricula did cover the Covenant, so there was some exposure, but the finer points about its motivations appeared to be kept secret.

Similarly, while the word "Forerunner" would be familiar to the average human's ears, they would only be referenced as the Covenant's gods. There was no explanation of the connection to Humanity.

The Halos were definitely kept secret, at least until Outpost Discovery. Now I think its treated more like an open secret, kind of how we have the CIA admitting to batshit things 20 years after the fact. You probably didn't hear about it then, and would you even believe it now? Julia wants to know the truth about the war. If only there was someone not bogged down by UNSC red tape who could tell her.

3. Feldokran Culture

Feldokra is a stormy Sangheili colony and notably, the birthplace of Sesa 'Refumee. This is a point of pride for the colony, who were quick to side with the Arbiter after the war. However, this also meant that it had a front-row seat in the Blooding Years, and suffered great casualties.

Because Feldokra is so extensively covered in water, it is prized for its trade in sea glass, which feature prominently as beads in their clothing and jewellery. Feldokrans are proud of this and are noted to wear more adornments than the average Sangheili, leading to a reputation for gaudiness. I also wanted to make a point in this story to shed some light on Sangheili culture that's not just war. They have economies!!

Feldokra is also always raining. I read an article once about how Seattleites can spot a tourist by who takes out an umbrella during a drizzle. I like to imagine its like that. They are accustomed to always getting rained on.

______________________________________________________________

What am I talking about? I'm talking about my Halo fanfiction series, Don't Go Where I Can't Find You. You can read all of Part 1 here, if you'd like:

[nolanhattrick]

why do you hate seattle and seattleites?

i'm from the east side of the state it came free with my birth certificate and phone number

for a real answer seattleites are absurdly annoying about people that live in rural areas and say stupid shit about the people that grow their food (immigrants) and think that... east side problems aren't real and it's annoying to me lol

[thegrandharveyspecter]

Oh hey, a fellow Seattleite! 👋🏻 I’m in San Francisco now (you might know a little friend of mine there) but I kind of miss it sometimes.

"Little friend, huh? I can make an educated guess who that might be." There were only two people Harvey knew from San Francisco, after all.

"Anyway, I only just moved to Seattle a year ago, so I haven't been here too long. But I like it. It's nice here."

@neonsoundbite

[freetheshit-outofyou]

My 17yo Garmin GPS72 and my new Garmin 67i, you'd think after 17 years there'd be some earth shacking advancements, you'd think. I have a feeling Garmin is a lot like Apple or Glock in that they don't really change much over time. A tweak here or there a new feature, like the SOS button but other than that not much else. Beyond things that didn't really exist 17 years ago like cell phone Bluetooth connections, cell service just about everywhere, web page integration there is not much of a difference. Of course that is over simplifying the two devices. Right now the biggest failing of the 67i is none of the buttons are back lit, my old crappy GPS has that and I have used it a lot because I'm using these things in the dark. It does have a NOD (optical/observation device) setting that's great and all but unless you have NOD's that's worthless and I'm betting the buttons will still be hard to see. I think the biggest pain of the new GPS is all the apps and programs you need to just get it running. The GPS72, tune it on, update vis the Seattleites and you are on the move. The 67i, you have to have the Garmin Explorer app, Garmin connect, and Garmin Express at a minimum. But there is a good chance if you are going to use this daily you'll also have to use Garmin Basecamp or some other like app. With all of that you'll still need to pair it with your phone or some other external device to make the navigation of the whole thing smoother. With all that said a stubby pencil, compass and protractor won't call you help in an emergency. They can't be observed by other people following you from home and they can't send or receive messages via the satellite network in near real time anywhere on the planet. It's only day two with the 67i, more to come. The photos of my Jeep do not fully express the 7% angles it is at. I got 3/4th up the hill before the lava rock and Tufa mounds gave way to pure desert sand I had to stop. It is rare that my Jeep with the front and back locked in can't get someplace but this was such a day.