#second attempt at this idea and i think this one is better tbh

[convexicalcrow]

The first thing to hit Cub was a terrible headache. Last thing he remembered was... Actually, he couldn't remember. There had been endless desert for what felt like weeks. Months, perhaps. Too long. He felt a soft voice on the edge of his mind, but couldn't decipher the words. Everything felt heavy. His body was stiff, unwilling to move.

-

Someone was holding his hand. He could feel the soft way their fingers were brushing his skin. There was. A strange silence around him. Perhaps he breathed.

"Scar?"

Cub wasn't sure he'd spoken; his throat felt dry and raw, like he hadn't had anything to drink for weeks. Had he even spoken, or was his voice simply in his mind?

"Your friend is safe, as are you. You are amongst friends."

The reply came from an unfamiliar voice, but he understood the words, so he was clearly amongst his own people. An adult was speaking, he could tell by the way he spoke. Perhaps he'd gone home at last. Maybe that's what had happened.

"Home?" Cub asked hopefully.

"No, this is not Tawy. But it is still home," the voice said. "Here, drink, you are very lucky to be alive."

Cub opened his eyes as a hand cupped the back of his head gently, lifting him up into a slight sitting position as a bowl was pressed to his lips. "Healing?"

"Healing," the man said.

"Healing," Cub said, and drank the potion.

-

The room he was in was like a dark cave, now that he could look around it. Soft, low lighting, and a warm fire that was tended to by healers. Cub was still lying down, but he'd seen Scar lying beside him and that had allayed all his fears. As long as he had Scar, he was fine. Jellie, too, was fine, having curled up beside Scar and not moved save to take some small scraps of meat for food.

The ceiling, as much as you could call it that, was painted with white spots like stars. He'd counted them all by now. There were one thousand, seven hundred, and fifty eight of them. He hadn't been told much about where he was, just that he was safe. He suspected they were being taken care of here until they were well enough to take in more information.

Certainly, some of the people he'd seen were not Tamari. They wore strange clothes, spoke in strange languages. Perhaps they were Tjehenu tribes. Though why Tjehenu were sheltering Tamari, Cub didn't know. It all felt too strange to him.

-

"I keep thinking about them. I keep seeing them as I stare at the stars up there," Cub murmured, lying close to Scar as they tried to sleep.

"Well, that's fair. That's where they're meant to be, right? They live in the sky?" Scar said.

"Do you think so? I hope they're up there. Sometimes I dream that they're lost in the Lake of Fire, and all I can hear are their screams," Cub said.

Scar brought him into his arms. "No, that's just bad dreams. Don't think on it, okay? It means nothing."

"Really? I heard that's like, a sign of bad things, though. From the dream books," Cub said.

"It can be, sure. But I think you two have just been through a lot, and perhaps that's just coming through in your dreams."

Cub and Scar sat up to see one of the Tameri healers come and sit beside them. They'd learned his name was Ahmose. "You think so?"

Ahmose nodded. "We know about the war. We escaped it too. It has taken a toll on all of us. I can't imagine what it does to the mind of a child."

Cub clung to Scar, fighting back his emotions. No. He wouldn't fall apart. No. He wouldn't cry. He was strong! Like his father!

"We have been wandering for maybe a year, all alone. It's not been easy," Scar said quietly. "His father told me to leave, to take him with me and get out of Tawy."

"I think you two need to stay with us for a while. We can give you a home here. Will it be the same kind of home as Tawy? No. But while we live, the Netjeru still live. You are here because you still live," Ahmose said.

"Did the camel make it, by the way?" Scar said.

"Safe and sound, and very well fed now. All your possessions have been kept safe. They will be returned to you when you have recovered," Ahmose said.

"Thank you. That camel is the reason we are alive," Scar said.

"I had gathered that. The women hunters here found you and your camel and brought you here. The desert has spared you," Ahmose said.

"Thank you," Cub said, turning to look at him. He still felt a huge weight in his chest, but the grief had subsided with Scar's touch. Perhaps one day he'll open that wound, but not today, not today.

[24hlevi]

I know we've got Lottie x innocent reader.. But what about th othe yjs 🤔🤔🤔

ooooh 🤭 imma give a few thoughts for each of them cause i love this but can't come up with full hcs sorry. thank you for continuing the innocent reader vision anon 🫶 also this is more with their adult versions in mind!

shauna -

- shauna adores your innocence, she literally thinks it's the cutest thing ever when you two first get together, how you haven't done anything like smoking or drinking, how you wear whatever clothes you want without realizing the way people look at you in said outfits

- she will subconsciously baby you tho, she will of course stop if you say for her to but she loves babying you :( not in like a weird way but just in a nurturing way that shows she loves you dearly

- she has such a thing for marking you up for everyone else to see how your hers and hers only, a smile always forming on her face whenever you don't try to cover it up and you two go out being given weird looks by the amount of hickeys on your neck

- she tries to start out slow with you during your first time with her but she can't help but get rough at the sounds of you whining and moaning just for her :(

nat -

- she's the one who enjoys your innocence the most, the fact that you have barely done anything rebellious in your life leads nat to being the gf who will make you do reckless things and live life to the fullest, maybe getting arrested in the process (oops)

- nat also thinks it's kinda cool that you two are polar opposites when in public and you're wearing the cutest thing possible and she's just in her leather jacket and jeans, she'd rather die than use the word aesthetic for how pleasing it is, but that's what it is lol

- nat is also the biggest on the corruption side of things, to just break down those innocent walls that stop you from whimpering her name underneath her is like winning a prize to her and when you finally let go of feeling shy and innocent, she is going to make sure you know you're hers

- thinking of her teaching you how to ride her strap for the first time and she slowly coaxes you into moving your hips faster and make more pretty noises for her, smiling at your whines before flipping you over and just pounding into you

misty -

- misty definitely takes advantage of your innocence, most of the time without you even realizing it, which makes it better for her in the end when she makes you do things that you wouldn't do otherwise without her there, it gives her a sense of pride and that she's needed

- she also just thinks it's cute when you have little to no idea what's going on or when people try to flirt with you and you just think they're being nice, misty is one to get jealous, but just so she can take you back home and make sure you remember who you belong to

- misty is the second biggest on corruption imo, she loves how innocent you are, buying you pretty revealing clothing to wear around the house so she can have you whenever she wants and seeing your eyes widen when she grabs you by your hips pulling you towards her gets her going so bad she will take you right then and there

- roleplay is huge for misty, especially medical themes, and she loves opening your mind to those things and show you how to have fun and have a good time as well even when she's three gloved fingers inside of you and is degrading you beyond belief mixed with praises

tai -

- the only normal one (jk), tai is one that thinks it's cute and enjoys the way that your innocence is genuine and how it's just how you are, not like you're doing it on purpose or something

- tbh tai doesn't seem like she would get jealous because of it, will she glare daggers at whoever is attempting to flirt with you to the point they back off? yes. but she won't be verbal about it 😭 you go over to her wondering why the overly kind person just left and she's like "ah idk babe" acting like she wasn't killing them with her mind

- tai will make you be verbal with what you want, she won't do anything until you tell her what it exactly is that you want, loving to see the way you break down crumbling and soon start begging for her to do something, anything

- you cannot tell me this woman doesn't have a thing for being called ma'am, like you'd say it as a joke and she would immediately change up and tell you to say it again which leads to a newly found word to use when having sex

van -

- van thinks your innocence is a little silly at first (affectionately), how you don't realize the certain things you do would be seen as flirting or not noticing when others are flirting with you, they think its silly

- they definitely show you all kinds of movies you haven't seen before to expand your horizons of cinema and entertainment, especially the more spicy ones to open your mind to some things 🤭

- van grins so hard when you tell them you wanna try something that you saw in a movie or something else and immediately drops everything to do it, they'll take their time with you to make sure you actually want to do it before going down on you like never before

- van is into experimenting with anything, whatever you wanna do they will gladly do for you, you basically become their pillow princess/prince and they will make sure the neighbors can hear cause they just love the sounds you make when they're pounding into you with their strap

[patrophthia]

attention is what i want! | theo. nott

pairing: theodore nott x fem!reader

genre: pining, one sided crushes, angst !!, complicated feelings, theo is a dick tbh, humor (my attempt at it), reader embarrasses herself (multiple time), girls girls pansy, reader are friends with the golden trio but isn’t a gryffindor, cursing, drinking, a bit suggestive in the end hehe

wc: 4.3k (idk how it got this long, i planned to write sth with like 2k at most but it kept going)

note: i wrote this while listening to attention by new jeans for two hours straight (yay pining!) i have very mixed feelings for this fic but here it is anyways!

summary: it’s no secret that you have a crush on theodore nott, theo knows it, hell the whole school knew it; maybe if they didn’t then it’d be easier for you to get over him after you embarrassed yourself in front of the whole school. at least you got a new friend because of it.

To say you had a crush on Theodore Nott would be an understatement. You never actually confessed to the Slytherin but it's as clear as days that you were into him. 

And when he was as good looking as he was, could anyone really blame you? 

Not really, not when most of Hogwarts found your attempt at shooting your shot with him the most amusing thing ever. 

"Good morning, Nott." Your hand shot upwards the second the Slytherin enters the classroom. His eyes settling on you whilst his friends bickers behind him. "I saved you a seat." 

There's snickering from behind you, hushed whispers as your classmate gossips about your pathetic attempt at getting with Theodore once more. 

His eyes scans the room, finally settling on one of the two empty seats behind the class and B-lining towards it. Zabini, having lost to Malfoy at grabbing the seat next to Theodore smiles at you kindly. Maybe even apologetically as he sits next to you. 

"Better luck next time?" He offers, trying to lighten your mood and you smile back, nodding. "You'll get him eventually." 

And though your voice is low, barely audible and muffled; Zabini still manages to hear you huff out a: "doubt it." 

"Do you think he'd pay attention to me if I dyed my hair green?" You ask, playing with your hair. 

Sure, your hair would end up damaged but if it meant Theodore would spare a glance your way then you'd take it. 

Harry looks at you as if you'd grown an extra head, green eyes enlarged as he tries to gauge whether you were serious or not. "Excuse me?" 

"I think I could pull of forest green hair." 

Hermione rolls her eyes. "No, you can't." She doesn't really mean it though, she does agree that you'd probably pull off forest green hair but she'd rather you do it for your own personal wants rather than to gain someone else's attention. "And you won't." 

You only huff at her words. "Why not?"

"Because, it's stupid. You'd look stupid doing so." Mione doesn't bother sugarcoating it, she doesn't need to when you've known her as long as you have. "If you need his attention so badly then ask him out, just drop the question and get it over with." 

"I'm trying to!" You groan, passing your plate with leftovers over to Ron who accepts it gladly. "I could walk naked in front of him and he wouldn't even bat an eyelash." 

Ron face scrunches at the idea, finding the prospect of a naked you disgusting. "You could put up a banner," he suggests through a mouthful of food. "I'd notice someone if they put up a banner with my name on it." 

And when Hermione's whacked Ron at him encouraging what she deemed was self destructive behavior, the conversation shifts to something else completely. 

You're huffing and puffing when you straighten up, showing your three closest friends what you'd been working on for the last two days. "What do you think?" 

Ron gasps loudly, eyes wide as he takes in the imagine in front of him. "You're crazy." 

"If you'd just—" Hermione, as if it was second nature, reaches up and smack at his arm. "—learnt how to shut up, this wouldn't have happened." 

It's only natural for you to frown at their reaction, brows knitted as you asked them. "Is it too much?" 

Harry, and his sweet sweet soul tries his best to not hurt your feelings as he nodded. "Maybe?" He tries to soften the blow, adding on: "I think it's brilliant, it's just ... a lot." 

You look over your masterpiece. Reading out the glittering paint, letter by letter and watching it as it takes shape into one of the biggest banner you've seen at Hogwarts by far. 

Written in shining green paint were the words: 

A-T-T-E-N-T-I-O-N, attention is what I want. Nott, go out with me? 

"I mean, if anything you'll definitely get his attention with that," Harry says, blinking rapidly at the banner. "It's pretty hard to miss." 

"Let's hope so." 

The dining hall is louder than normal, it has always been noisy; having seated thousands of teenagers who had little to none supervision during their breakfast, lunch, and dinner. 

But like Theodore has noted earlier, it's noisier than normal. And the drop of voices is significant when he steps through the large doors, loud gossips turns to hushed whispers; eyes roaming between him and a figure by the Gryffindor table. 

It doesn't take him long to notice why, a dust of glitter falling down on him from above. He glances up, eyes squinting as he reads out the banner before him. 

A-T-T-E-N-T-I-O-N, attention is what I want. Nott, go out with me? 

The letters are bright, glinting under the candle light as if it was taunting him, pushing at his buttons for a reaction. And though, there was no name written on the banner to indicate who'd made it; he knew that it was you. 

Dark eyes narrows as he zones in on you. You dressed up nicely, watching him with a pretty smile on your waiting face. 

And when all he did was roll his eyes and turn towards the Slytherin table, without sparing you another look. You all but deflated in front of everyone's eyes. 

You knew it was stupid, and that it was all your fault to make your love life so public for everyone to entertain themselves with, but you can't help but feel hurt at the laughter bubbling through out the hall. 

You're scrambling out of your seat, rushing out of the hall when a voice shouts out. "Serves you right, pick me!" 

Oddly enough, it's Pansy who speaks up; her voice loud and clearly irritated when she shouts back, telling them to go and: "Fuck yourself." 

Why the Slytherin threw a dirty glare at her friend and ran after you despite the two of you not being friends —let alone having been seen together before, was a mystery to everyone. 

And since Hermione loves you too much for her own good, she’s quick to scramble out of her seat, casting a spell to set the banner up in flames as she rushed after Pansy and you. 

There’s a sort of guilt that Hermione feels when she finds you hunched over with Pansy’s hand running up and down your back. The two of you weren’t friends, neither is Hermione and Pansy but when a girl’s in need of comfort, it’s only normal for them to be there for her. 

“I don’t get why you’re into him, honestly,” Pansy grits out, “out of all the boys in Slytherin you just had to choose the dickhead, didn’t you?” 

Hermione can hear you sniffle out a laugh as she takes a seat on your other side. “Out of all the boys in Hogwarts you just had to choose the dickhead, huh?” 

Pansy and Hermione are sharing a grin as you lift your head up slightly, a small smile tugging at your lips. “It’s not like I wanted to like him, you know?” You say with a small laugh. “I guess I’m just attracted to an asshole.” 

“You’re guessing this now?” Pansy says with a roll of her eyes, there’s no venom in her tone, only playful annoyance. “This isn’t the first time he’s treated you like this. I’ve heard all about your … attempts, you know?” 

“Really?” You’re laughing and the hurt in your tone is clearer than ever. “How embarrassing.” 

“It’s not,” Hermione reassured you, “if anything I think it’s endearing.” 

“Me making a fool of myself for a guy is endearing to you?” 

Pansy giggles at your words. “I’ve done worse, maybe just not so publicly.” Her voice is playful when she adds on, “but this should be the final nail in the coffin right? Finally getting over that asshole after this?” 

“That asshole is your best friend,” you remind her and she looks to her side bashfully. 

“That doesn’t excuse him for being horrible to you,” she mumbled. “And I thought Draco was bad.”

“Malfoy is bad,” Hermione chimes in. “He just didn’t humiliate you like Nott did her.” 

Pansy tilts her head to the side in thought. “Maybe. Or maybe we should just stop dating Slytherin guys over all.” 

Hermione only smiles fondly at her words. “Maybe.” 

You’re doing fine. Or as fine as one could be after a publicly humiliating confession. You’re still very you, smiling at Theodore every chance you get even though you’ve told your friends (now extended to Pansy) multiple times that you were getting over him. 

The only BIG difference that anyone noticed after your rejection was that you no longer attempted to get closer to Theodore. You don’t save him seats, you don’t tell him good morning, and they’d be lying if they said it wasn’t weird. 

“Is this seat taken?” 

You look up, eyes widening at the person in front of you and nodded. “I’m saving it for someone.” You pray to Merlin that he doesn’t hear the waver in your voice as you did so. “Is there something you needed?” 

He doesn’t answer you, instead placing his book bag on your desk. You try to control the butterflies caged in your stomach, fluttering at the sight of his forearm flexing as he did so. “You’re saving it for me? Like always?” 

You blink at him. “… no. I’m saving it for Blaise.” 

“Huh,” he hums thoughtfully, “you’re in first name basis now?” 

You move to your right when he takes his seat to your left, trying to distance yourself from him. “What do you want?” 

He looks at you and your pretense of being over him crumbles all over, tumbling as he nearly knocks you off your feet just how intense his gaze is. And though you’ve always wanted his attention, for him to look at you back like he’s doing now. You can’t help but feel sick to your stomach with how much you still liked him. 

“Attention is what you want, right?” 

What is he playing at? “Not anymore.” 

“Shame.” There’s a slight smile at your answer. “I was finally ready to give it to you.” 

“He said that?” Pansy repeats your words back to you, her hand moving away from your face as she dips it back into the face mask she’d mixed up. “That’s weird.” 

“That’s what I thought,” you murmur, feeling Hermione kick her feet into your lap. “I’m so confused right now.” 

“Maybe he’s playing hard to get?” Hermione suggests. “Even if he is I hope he knows the only hard thing he’s getting is a rock thrown at his face.” 

It’s clear that she’s taken your rejection harder than you did, grumbling at the thought of him. “A text book if he’s lucky.” 

Pansy finishes up your face mask and sets the bowl down. “I told him to apologise to you, not to go and bother you," she says, frowning slightly.

“You told him to apologise?” The tone of the conversation shifts, downing just the slightest bit. 

Pansy avoids your eyes as she nods, “I just wanted him to say sorry for how he treated you, you didn’t deserve that. But that fucker decided to go and do something weird, I’m sorry, lovely.” 

When she’s taken up the nickname lovely for you, you don’t know. But you’re too much into your head to say anything about it. “Please don’t do that. Don’t meddle with this just because you pity me. I can handle this by myself.” 

“I don’t—” Pansy pauses, realising the weight of her actions “—I’m sorry, I promise I’ll leave you be.” 

You’re nodding when you tell her: “thank you.” 

Trying to jot down notes does nothing to soothe your nerves, and it definitely doesn’t distract you from the fact that Theodore Nott is sitting so damn close to you. So close that your thighs were touching, and that with any small move you made, your shoulder brushes against his. 

Moving your chair to the right is no use, not when he’d move his just so he’d be closer to you. You’re so close you could practically hear him breathe. 

It’s when your quill slips off of your desk that you have to confront him about it. You nudge at his thigh with yours, forcing them to his left only for him to look at you curiously. “Can you move?” 

“Why?” He asks instead, planting his thighs where they’d been. 

“My quill fell, I need to get it.” You explain, avoiding his eyes as best as you could. His attention is not good for your heart, maybe it two weeks ago, but it definitely wasn’t now. 

Theodore is uninterested and unmoving when he quipped back. “And you can’t get like this?” 

Not if you didn’t want to plan your face on his lap and be so terribly close to his— yeah no. You sigh, leaning forward to tap at the person’s in front of you shoulder. “Would you mind getting my quill for me please? It’s bit hard for me to reach.” 

The person in front nods and leans down to get it for you with a smile. And when they hands it to you, their finger brushing against yours, you distinctly feel Theodore press himself closer to you. 

“You could’ve borrowed mine,” Theodore says lowly, eyeing you from above. 

He’s slightly taller than you, even when you’re both sat. Trying to prove to him (and yourself) that you were over him, and that this close proximity did not matter to you; you strain your neck up to glare at him. “You could’ve moved.” 

“Maybe,” he concurs. “And you could’ve just asked for me to get it for you.” 

“Like you’d do that,” you murmur with a roll of your eyes. “For me of all people.” 

“For you of all people,” he repeats. 

You hate how you instinctively break away from his gaze, looking at your notes as you try to calm your beating heart. Two weeks is nearly not enough to time to get over a crush you’ve been harboring for the longest time, not when you liked him so much you didn’t bother to keep it a secret to anyone and he knows it. 

He knows it and he’s using it as an advantage, for what exactly you don’t know. What you do know, is that you need to get away from Theodore Nott. Or kiss him. Whichever works. 

You sigh, glancing at your hands and hope that your voice doesn’t tremble when you quietly ask him. “What are you playing at Theodore?” You’re exasperated and he can hear it, he can hear the exhaustion in your voice and he tries his best not to let it get to him. “I know Pansy told you to apologize but you’re not apologizing, you’re just making things worse.” 

He doesn’t say anything, though you can still feel his eyes on you. “Excuse me, Professor,” he says suddenly, his shoulder knocking yours as he stood up, “I’m feeling a bit under the weather, would you mind letting me slip to the infirmary?” 

His hands are on you, holding firmly onto your wrist as he speaks. “It’s best if I had a friend to help me.” The professor doesn’t get a chance to respond before Theodore is pulling you away from the class. 

Your words are jumbled, flailing as you try to match up his pace; you’re confused and against your better judgement, you trust that he wouldn’t hurt you —even if he’d done so many times before. 

He comes to a halt by a hallway, it’s quiet still; students having yet left their classes. 

He looks at you, dark eyes clouding with emotion and tries to get you to look at him. Practically begging for you to give him your attention before speaking. “How am I making things worse? It’s what you wanted isn’t it?” 

“It is,” you say after a minute. “It’s just— this isn’t how I wanted it.

I like you, Theodore. A lot and I’ve made it so clear so many times and you always made it clear that you didn’t like me back. I finally try to get over you and you do this? What even is this? What are you trying to get at, Theo?” 

He doesn’t answer you, his hand finally releasing the grip on your wrist to rest by his side. 

You scoff, noting how he falls back to his pattern of not speaking to you when you’re practically pouring your heart out to him. 

“Why did never ask me out?” 

Your expression is puzzled, and he knows that he needs to explain himself, for him to tell you exactly what he meant but can’t bring himself to. Not when he wants to keep his pride in check.

“I did ask you out,” you tell him slowly. “In front of everyone.” 

“Exactly,��� his reply is breathless as if he had been pondering over this for ages, “in front of everyone. Why didn’t you tell me you like me? Why didn’t you ask me when it’s just you and I?” 

“Are you serious?” You let out a ridiculing laugh. “You never wanted to step a single foot next to me and you expected me to ask you when it’s just me and you? Are you kidding me? 

Did you ever wonder why I wrote ‘attention is what I want’?” 

He’s speechless. And screwed. He can sense that you’re growing agitated with him, and he hates it. 

“Would it have changed anything if I had asked you out between you and I?” 

His silence is loud enough for you to understand his converted answer. 

“Merlin, why did you bring me out here, Theodore?” 

Theodore is bad at emotions. He’s bad at feelings, he’s bad at love and everything alike. He doesn’t like you and he’s pretty sure of it. Then why does it bother him so much to know that you no longer wanted anything to do with him. 

“I don’t know.” 

“Of course you don’t.” You meet his eyes and he knows that this is the end, you’re done with him for good. “Out of all the boys in Hogwarts you just had to be the one I liked, huh?”

“And that’s it?” Ron ask curiously. “You’re finally getting over him?” 

“Mhmm,” you hum, waving at Pansy who waved at you from the end of the dining hall, her Slytherin friends pointedly looking between you, Pansy, and Nott. “Finally am.” 

Ron doesn’t need to know that despite your mind being set on getting over Nott, your stomach still did somersault every time you see him —even in your peripheral vision. 

And when you smile at him, much like you did to everyone else and he doesn’t smile back at you; you feel your heart break all over again. 

It’s your own fault though, falling for a mere stranger who you’d only ever spoken to in classes —all of which having been conversations about school. 

“Do I get reward?” 

Hermione rolls her eyes. “A reward for doing something we’ve been telling you to do for ages? You wish.” 

“I’ve been wishing for something else.” The mischievous look on your face is enough to clue her in on where your mind as gone, scrunching her face as she scowls at you. “Gross.” 

“Are you okay though?” Harry asks you lowly. “I know it can be hard to get over crushes.” Take him and Chang for example. “So if you need anything we’re here for you.” 

“I’m okay,” you tell him. “Or at least I’ll be.” 

Harry offers you a smile, as kind as always. “That’s good then.” 

It’d only be weird for you to visit the Slytherin common room often (courtesy of Pansy) and for you to not run into Theodore at least once. 

You’re standing outside the common room, waiting for Pansy to come and get you when the door swings open and he stands there in front of you. He’s in his pajamas, an oversized sweater pooling at his hands. 

“What are you doing here?” 

Though you’re also in your pajamas, you feel slightly underdressed under his eyes. Only having worn a loose T-shirt and shorts for girls night. 

You want to ask him what he’s doing here but it is his house’s common room so you withheld your question to yourself. “Pansy.” 

He gives you a once over before glancing back into the common room, it’s roaring with laughters; a bunch of the Slytherin boys deciding to play card games as they indulge themselves with the alcohol they bought with their father’s money. 

“Let me walk you in,” he offers, already turning back into the common room; expecting for you to follow after him. 

“You don’t need to—” you don’t get to finish your words when Theodore throws you a sharp look. As if he was asking you to protest him on this. You sigh, following after him. 

Theodore stays a good distance away, hiding you and your bare legs from the other Slytherins. He doesn’t really have to though, most of them minding their own business until Blaise chirps up to say hi. 

“Hello,” you greeted him back, waving at him. Crabbe, now noticing your interaction lets out a low whistle at the sight of you. And Theodore moves closer to you, almost possessively. “I’ll see you in the morning?” 

“Mhmm,” Blaise says, humming before turning his attention back to Enzo. “Goodnight, princess.” 

There’s a snicker from Goyle, smirking as he says. “You’re stealing Nott’s girl now?” 

You only offer him a smile, feeling Theodore come in over closer to you as he hurries you up the stairs. There’s a thump! from behind and you knew, without seeing, that Blaise threw a pillow at the bastards face. 

Theodore doesn’t try to hide his amusement when you curse a hex in Crabbe and Goyle’s way, not when Mattheo’s laughter roared across the room at your spell. 

“Thank you,” you tell Theodore, and you noticed that his lips are curled; why exactly, you don’t want to know. “Goodnight, Theodore.” 

You’re halfway up the stairs when he calls your name, you turn to him. “Yes?” 

“Goodnight,” he says, turning on his heel to leave. 

You turn back up the stairs, only to pause and look back at him once, twice; before setting off to find Pansy. 

It’s two weeks later when Theodore bumps into you again, this time; quite literally. His hands are on you, stilling you so you wouldn’t fall flat on your ass. 

The dance floor is crowded, but it’s to be expected when one of the most popular students at Hogwarts (read: Blaise Zabini) is throwing a birthday party. 

You’re —by extension through Pansy, a friend of his which means you needed to be there or he’d be pretty (very) sad about it and pester you about it for the rest of your life. 

“Woah!” Your hands lay awkwardly on his chest, trying to push him away whilst trying to balance yourself still. “Watch where you’re going.” 

Theodore straightens you up, hands lingering a little too long before letting you go. “Sorry,” he murmurs, “I’m sorry.” 

And though you promised yourself to let go off Theodore months ago, you can’t help but feel your heart twist at his words. Skin burning where he’d touch you mere seconds ago. 

“It’s fine,” you wave him off, “just be more careful.” 

“Yeah.” His tone is breathless, blinking at you slowly as if he couldn’t believe you were so close to him. “You look nice.” 

You better hope so, it’s not like you spend an hour getting ready to look anything but nice. And despite your better judgment, you feel butterflies setting off in your stomach once more. But that could’ve also been caused by the mixed concoction you downed five minutes ago. 

“Thank you,” you murmur. “You too, Theo.” 

“Mhmm,” he hums nodding, his expression is hesitant. “Thank you,��� he says, turning his head to the side and under the clubbing lights, you can easily spot the tinging redness at the top of his ears. “Do you want to get out of here?” 

“What?” It’s not that you didn’t hear him, it’s that you didn’t want to hear him. Because you knew, damn well, that if he’d just repeated himself you would agree within a heartbeat.

He gulps, and repeat himself. “Do you want to get out of here?” 

Maybe your heart is weak, maybe it’s the alcohol, or maybe it’s just Theodore that gets you out of there with him attached to your lips. 

His hand pressing into the small of your back as you leaned against the wall, a small groan slipping from his lips when you nipped on it. 

Theodore pulls back, eyes wide and roaming your face as he takes your features in; memorising the slope of your nose, the plumpness in your lips, and the apples of your cheeks as if this was the last time he’d be able to do so. And presses his lips to yours once more. 

He calls out your name, a free hand reaching up to cup your jaw so you’d look at him. For you to give him the attention he so desperately wanted from you. “I’m sorry,” he says, “I know you probably hate me and I’m so sorry but give me a chance, please.” 

His tone is desperate, almost begging as he did so and you wonder if he knew the impact he still had on you. He lets go of your jaw, arm wrapping around your waist, bringing you impossibly closer to him.

“Give me a chance to make it up to you,” he asks of you, mouth pressing wet kisses down your neck as he repeats himself. “Please, please, pretty girl.” 

“Theo.” His kisses doesn’t stop, much less falter at your words. “Theo.” 

“Mhmm?” He hums against your neck, pulling back to give you his full an undivided attention. “Yes?” 

He’s a bit taken aback when you kiss him quickly, chasing your lips as you pulled back. “You have a lot to make up for.” 

“I know.” The curled smile of his returns, dark eyes glinting as he looks at you. “But for now let me give you all my attention.”

— from bee: i guess reader got what she wished for at the end lol, feedbacks and reblogs are greatly appreciated!! (๑>◡<๑)

p.s this pic of mingyu is so (my) bf i love him!!

[wannabespacesmuggler]

D.D. | Shane's Girl

Part Two | Masterlist | Buy me a coffee | Check out the playlist

Summary: Daryl Dixon knows he shouldn’t be thinking about you when he’s alone at night in his tent. Hell, he shouldn’t even be looking at you throughout the day. You’re not his. You’re Shane’s girl. But Daryl doesn’t like the way Shane treats you. And he certainly doesn’t like how you’re forced to play ‘loving girlfriend’ to a man with eyes for another woman at the camp.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Warnings: Merle Dixon being Merle Dixon, Shane Walsh isn’t great either tbh

Word Count: 1K

Author’s Note: So it's been a hot second (writer's block is a bitch), but I really love this idea and apparently a lot of you guys do too! Thanks for all the love on the first part, all the comments and reblogs have meant the world to me. I really cannot believe how well the first part of this fic was received lol. Let me know what you guys think of this one, if you want to be added to the taglist, or just want to ask me a question.

Extras: Playlist

Daryl is, if anything, a man of his word. He agreed that he’d stay the hell away from Shane’s girl, so that’s exactly what he did. It wasn’t difficult; he is almost always on a hunting trip to keep the ragtag group of survivors fed and when he isn’t, Daryl can be found in his tent taking care of his crossbow and bolts. And since Merle hasn’t spoken a word to you since the little incident in camp, your path just hasn’t crossed his.

That is until his crossbow bolts go missing one morning. 

Daryl rips his tent apart in an attempt to find his missing arrows. A steady stream of expletives escape his mouth as he shuffles through Merle’s belongings, hoping that his older brother just so happened to take his bolts and stash them with his possessions -- it certainly wouldn’t be the first time that Merle took something of his and claimed it as his own. 

After about thirty minutes, Daryl lets out a frustrated sigh. If his bolts aren’t in here, that means someone in camp took them and that could lead to some issues. After the incident with you and Merle, Daryl hasn’t just kept his distance from you -- Daryl has isolated himself further from everyone at the makeshift camp. 

He’s not an idiot and he picked up on everyone’s apprehension in respect to the Dixon brothers since the first few days in camp. That seems to have only gotten worse after Merle’s decision to make a scene in the middle of camp. It doesn’t seem to bother the older Dixon brother; however, Daryl cannot stand how many eyes seem to focus on him whenever he makes an appearance in camp nowadays. Because of this, Daryl has made his trips to camp scarce -- only making his way there to drop off more provisions and supplies. He keeps his head down, he doesn’t speak to anyone, and he doesn’t cause problems.

However, Daryl does take the time to observe the camp and its occupants whenever he’s there. He takes mental notes of who casts him concerned looks. Lori and Carol will stop scrubbing laundry and round up their children every time they see him make his way to the RV. He notices Dale’s eyes narrow every time he enters the RV and how he races to check all of their supplies as soon as he’s stepped foot out of the vehicle. As opposed to popular belief, Daryl has never taken anything from the RV; however, he has left his fair share of scavenged nuts and berries and a handful of animal carcasses in order to keep the camp fed. He’s painfully aware of Shane glaring at him from atop Dale’s RV. He tries to ignore it, but he can’t help the way that it makes his skin crawl. And, against his better judgment, he finds himself keeping tabs on you. It wasn’t a conscious decision at first, but, as time has passed, he’s found his curiosity towards you shifting into what Daryl can only describe as protectiveness.

And that’s how Daryl finds himself awkwardly walking up to you as you scrub laundry against a washboard. You don’t seem to notice his presence as he approaches. He shifts on feet before clearing his throat, in an attempt to grab your attention. Your head shoots up and your eyes widen as they spot him standing in front of you. Daryl is prepared to turn heel and run in the other direction based on your reaction until a smile spreads across your face. You push your hair out of your eyes and drop the laundry in your hands into the basin in front of you before speaking. 

“Hey, Daryl. What’s up?”

“Ya know if Shane’s around?”

You move your head to look left, then right. Your eyes scan the camp before they land back on Daryl. You shrug your shoulders.

“Don’t know. I’m not his keeper.” 

Daryl releases a breath through his nose at your words. It’s the closest anyone in camp has come to making Daryl Dixon laugh as far as you know and it fills you with pride. You wipe your hands on your jeans and stand up from your position over the basin.

“I may not be Shane, but I might be able to help you.”

“Somebody took my crossbow bolts. Couldn’t find ‘em this mornin’.”

You immediately turn and start walking toward the RV. Shane had told you he was busy this morning with ‘inventory’ this morning. He already took your knife and pistol this morning, so you wouldn’t be surprised if you also found Daryl’s arrows. You explain this to Daryl as he walks behind you. If Merle was here, he’d be laughing at the younger Dixon brother. 

‘I leave you alone and you’re already following ‘er around like a lost puppy dog, little brother?’  

Daryl tries to shake off Merle’s voice echoing in his mind. He watches as you enter the RV and waits as he hears you rustling through the supplies. A few moments later you emerge with a handful of crossbow bolts. 

“I take it these are yours?”

Daryl nods and mumbles a quick thank you as he takes the arrows from you. He quickly counts them, ensuring that he’s gotten all of his property back.

“Do you make them yourself?”

He nods his head again, eyes still focused on the bolts in his hands.

“Could you show me sometime?”

Daryl looks up at you, his head cocked to the side slightly. He’s a little dumbfounded. He wasn’t expecting you to take an interest in his craftsmanship. Hell, he wasn’t expecting you to continue speaking to him after you found his arrows. Thrown off by your actions, Daryl simply says that first thing that crosses his mind as you look at him with an expectant expression.

“Sure.”

Taglist: @darylsl0ver @minervadashwood @hotgirlsshareaccounts @taterbbbug @dreamtofus @youcantstandit @ajlovesdilfs @prettywhenibleed @luvsvnlqt-things @evie-beanie @strnqer @marina-isabella @lissanovak @elissanatok @1tsk1tty @moejoeflow @ceoofdisappointment @jewellthebooknerd

[scatteredskittless]

Hiii! If you’re up for it, would you write an Angel Dust x platonic fem reader fic who has PTSD from SA, and she has a really scary encounter with Val that triggers her and Angel is super comforting? Sorry it’s super specific 😅

Platonic fem! Reader x Angel Dust

A/n: Of course !! Also super specific requests are fun to write so don’t be afraid to request them :)) I hope this was okay (∩˃o˂∩)♡

Warnings: Mentions of SA, Mentions of porn, Sexual themes, Talk of PTSD, Valentino in general is a warning In of itself tbh

Fluff✔️ Comfort✔️ Angst✔️ Smut❌

It was just like any other morning in the Hazbin Hotel, you woke up, got ready for the day ahead of you and then walked yourself down to the lobby to see all your friends.

You woke up a little later than everyone else did so when you got to the lobby, they seemed to be already doing one of Charlie’s little games. As per usual though with these games, no one was really paying attention to what was going on. Husk was too busy drinking, Niffty was running around and torturing bugs, Alastor was nowhere to be found and Angel Dust was on his phone.

He looked rather unimpressed as he scrolled through his phone, it vibrating every few seconds in his hand as he got notification after notification from none other than his boss, Valentino himself.

Once he got a call, he got up and took it. Charlie looking visibly upset once he had eventually told everyone he had to leave early for an “emergency shoot”

So you decided to be helpful and try to get Angel back to the hotel

“No, [name] seriously, I don’t think it’s a good idea to go after him.” Vaggie said, attempting to encourage you not to go after Angel and you couldn’t quite understand why?

“Why? It’ll be fine! I’ll just pop in and pop out.” You said with a shrug, turning around and leaving the hotel before anyone could get another word in.

And so, you were off to Angels studio.

Once you got there, it didn’t take long for Angel to recognize your presence. His eyes widening and excusing himself from the set for a moment. Valentino didn’t exactly look too pleased by that, considering what happened last time.

“What the fuck are you doin’ here?!” Angel Dust would whisper shout with a look of worry written all over his face as he approached you.

“I was just seeing if you were done… and if I could somehow convince your boss to let you off early if you weren’t?” You said back with an eyebrow raise, wondering what the big deal was.

He let out an incredulous titter, shaking his head no. “Toots, I’m not letting you anywhere near Val—”

Speak of the devil. Valentino cuts him off as he was now standing right in front of the two of them, not looking thrilled with your presence.

“And who might this be? Another one of your little friends, Angie?” Valentino would say condescendingly, making Angel glance away from him and at the ground beside him instead.

Another? What was up with everybody and not telling you things??

“Uhm.. I’m [name].” You introduced yourself as you glanced at the moth demon with a smile, a Cheshire worthy grin spreading across the demons face in return.

“Ahh sí? A beautiful name for para una mujer tan hermosa~” he said, taking your hand and licking up to your elbow, causing you to cringe slightly but you held it together for now…

Angel looked very uncomfortable, his eyes trained on you to makes sure nothing too crazy happened.

Of course, Valentino knew this.

“How would you like to watch? Maybe even join? Hm? I could make you a star muñeca..” He purred, raising a brow as he got uncomfortably close to you. This was starting to freak you out a little, as it would anybody. This guy was clearly a fucking creep.

You slowly shook your head no. “Nooo… thank you? Uh I can just sit and wait until he’s done.” You said, figuring it would be better to settle for that than to go further with this guy

“Perfect! From the top everybody!” He’d announce, turning his back to you and walking back to the set as he sat back down in his chair, making both you and Angel let out a sigh of relief as you both followed. You were a little shaken but you figured that was all the interaction you’d have with Angels boss for the day…

And oh, were you sorely mistaken. ⚠️ !! TW !! ⚠️

You sat down in an extra chair that Valentino had made his robot “Kitty” bring in for you to sit beside him on. you tried not to watch what Angel was doing on set as it felt weird to watch your friend suck some guys dick..

After a few minutes of scrolling on your phone, you felt a hand on your thigh.. slowly creeping upwards towards your skirt. Immediate warning bells went off in your head. Immediate flashbacks started happening.

You froze. Not knowing what to do but you knew damn well who was touching you. That fucker Valentino.

“What’s the matter, amor?” Valentino spoke with that shit eating grin on his face again, his head titling ever so slightly to the side as he glanced over at the feared expression on your face, pretending he had no idea what he was doing.

His hand slipped up to your panty line and that’s when you started to freak out, you stood up, looking quite startled. “Fuck off!” Was what came out of your mouth, causing an unamused expression to fall on Val’s face as he stood up again, practically towering over you…

That’s when Angel stepped in, immediately placing himself between you two, the porno he had been in the middle of shooting long forgotten.

“Val.” He said surprisingly firmly as he glared up at him before looking behind him at himself at you, and his expression softened as he sighed.

“Cmon, we’re goin’ home.” Angel said to you as he grabbed your hand with one of his, walking past Valentino.

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going bitch? You’re not done recording for the day” Valentino spat, a furious expression on his face and his words laced with venom.

Angel didn’t reply, walking out the doors with you as quickly as possible. He knew damn well he’d probably get punishment for this tomorrow but he couldn’t let whatever the fuck was going on between you and his boss go on any longer.

The walk back to the hotel was silent, you still trying to process everything that had just happened to you and shaking like a leaf as you gripped onto Angels hand.

Once you got back to the hotel Angel was quick to check up on you now.

“Hey baby, you okay? I… I’m sorry you had to deal with that, deal with.. him.” He’d say, worry written all over his face.

That’s when you started to tear up, crying and wrapping your arms around him.

He’d sigh once more and place a hand on the top of your head, his lower set of arms wrapping around you as he shushed you.

“It’s alright, you’re safe now.. okay? I’m never gonna let anythin’ like that happen to ya again.” he promised soothingly, silently blaming himself for letting it happen in the first place. This could’ve been prevented.

After a while of Angel Dust cooing gentle words and letting you cry as he held you, you started to calm down, sobs turning to sniffles as he rubbed the top of your head.

“There.. better?” He asked softly as he looked down at you, giving you a smile when you met his gaze, your makeup running if you had any of it on and your cheeks tear stained, pleased when he got a little nod from you.

“Good. Now we should probably actually go inside the hotel because I’m sure we look stupid just standing out here.” He quipped, earning a soft chuckle from you as you released him from your hug, giving another nod.

So that’s what you did, the both of you went inside the hotel and you settled yourselves in his room for the night as you had a little movie marathon, Fat Nuggets joining in with you two <3

Please do not repost, translate, or plagarize any of my fanfictions/writing/headcanons without permission ◟( ˃̶͈◡ ˂̶͈ )◞

ᯓ★ Scatteredskittles

[juyeonszn]

CLUMSY

PAIRING ju haknyeon x f!reader

WORD COUNT 6.03k

GENRES smut ﹒fluff

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, reader and juhak are bio lab partners, juhak is lowkey a bit of a loser BUT DW HE REDEEMS HIMSELF, mentions of alcohol, a game of rage cage…, he’s down insanely bad, the flirting goes kinda crazy, someone calls the cops, they run from said cops, reader is Nawt wasting any time, pet names (juhak calls reader princess), tbh they’re both switches in some ways, kitchen sex, oral sex (f!receiving), fingering, edging, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, creampie lol

SUMMARY when haknyeon ran into you at a tbz party for the first time, he didn’t think he would fall for you so quickly. or literally. or both simultaneously. but there’s a first time for everything, he supposes.

MORE andddddd here we go 🫡 second fic of the black out or back out collab 🙏 i forgot to link the masterlist in the last one so im gonna link it in this one in case u wanna read any of the others!! ANYWAY i had such a fun time writing this one, any excuse i get to write for juhak, i will take trust <3 if u enjoyed, don’t forget to reblog! and pls check out the other fics so far!!

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel

TAGLIST @millksea

SERIES MASTERLIST

Okay. So maybe trying to secure a girlfriend at a party wasn’t exactly Haknyeon’s best idea.

But, hey. You had to give him some credit. At least he was making an attempt. Most of his other frat brothers weren’t even making an effort. They seemed perfectly satisfied with charming their ways into random girls’ pants every weekend. Unfortunately, or fortunately considering he was a gentleman, Haknyeon wasn’t into that sort of thing.

It was just a little embarrassing that Kim Sunwoo’s love life had more progress than his own. Sunwoo was literally the resident loser bitch boy of the TBZ house. How was he closer to getting a girlfriend than he was? It made absolutely no sense.

Ju Haknyeon thought of himself as a catch. He was pretty neat, his room was cleaner than most guys’ his age. He knew how to cook basic meals, again, more than the average college sophomore. His car wasn’t on its last leg. (Cough cough… Kim Sunwoo, I’m looking at you.) He was a decent dude. He supported women’s rights and wrongs!

Apparently that was not enough these days.

“…And I need you to make sure the fridge is stocked completely. I’m not trying to drink my coffee without cream tomorrow morning because some idiot drank it while they were drunk.” Sangyeon commands, typing something furiously on his phone as some of the other guys move around the furniture.

“Bruh, I was in charge of buying everything last time. Why can’t someone else do it?” Kevin groans. Something else that wasn’t Haknyeon’s best idea? Walking into the kitchen during this very conversation. “What about JuHak? He looks like he has nothing better to do.”

“Yeah, whatever. That’s fine. Hak, I’m airdropping you the list.” Sangyeon waves his hand in dismissal, returning to his extensive presidential duties.

The sophomore deadpans, but doesn’t have the energy to argue back. You know, the usual fraternity was just a bunch of rich guys with more money than the tuition of each TBZ brother combined. However, the Tau Beta Zeta house was not your usual fraternity. It really was just a bunch of normal dudes thrown together. Though, Lee Sangyeon ran it like it was the fucking Navy.

Haknyeon accepts his defeat and grabs his things, heading out to the supermarket to shop for tonight’s party. Alcohol duty sucked more than door duty, in his opinion. You were sent out all alone, tasked with bringing back enough liquor and beer to last until early hours of the morning. It was a near impossible mission, unless you were Kevin Moon and good at practically everything in the world.

He pushes around the shopping cart mindlessly, though he knows he’ll have to make another trip. A long sigh leaves his lips as he enters the alcohol aisle. He fills the bottom of the cart with different cases of beer until he thinks he may drop one, and then starts to place things in the basket. He feels like a dumbass hauling it over to the registers, like everyone can see right through him.

He has to remind himself that this is for a good cause, that it’ll be worth it when everyone is enjoying themselves at the party. His actions won’t be in vain. Even after the second trip with another cart full of beer and various liquor bottles, Haknyeon keeps repeating affirmations in his head. This has to be the party.

In fact, he thinks his thoughts have manifested into reality when he sees you walking into the grocery store at the same time he’s leaving. You’re his pretty Bio lab partner. He’s always too nervous to hold a substantial conversation with you, so he settles for the bare minimum, which is unfulfilling small talk during your labs. It’s never what he needs though. Aside from your name, Haknyeon knows nothing about you.

“Y/N?” What he wants right now, however, is to shoot himself in the foot for sounding so unsure.

You glance up from your phone, a smile lighting up your face when you recognize him. “Haknyeon! Hey! What’s up?”

“Last minute preparations for the TBZ party tonight,” he gestures at his shopping cart with pursed lips. “You?”

“That’s so funny that you say that! My friends and I are going—“ You eye his cart with confusion. “Wait, I didn’t know you were in Tau Beta Zeta.”

“Yeah…” Haknyeon laughs awkwardly. “Surprise!”

You giggle, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t seem like the frat boy type. Then again, TBZ isn’t your average frat so, I guess that kinda adds up.”

Haknyeon’s not sure if he should take that as a compliment or not, but since it’s coming from you, he decides that he will. The realization that you mentioned you’d be attending the party finally sets in at that same moment. “So, I’ll see you later, then?”

You nod, smile widening. “Yeah, I’m just grabbing a bottle for us to bring with. But I’ll be there. Maybe we’ll bump into each other.”

God, he hopes so. This is the perfect opportunity for him to swoop in and learn everything he’s been dying to know about you. His tongue pokes the inside of his cheek. “I don’t know… I’m a busy man. It might be a little hard.”

That cute little laugh of yours makes another appearance. “I’ll be on the lookout, don’t worry. See you tonight, Haknyeon.”

Ju Haknyeon thinks that he must’ve done something monumental in a past life, like saving a dog from a burning building or stopping a world war. How else would the universe reward him this kindly? All he can do is wave as you maneuver around an elderly couple passing by into the store.

Maybe Kevin Moon wasn’t that bad. And maybe Lee Sangyeon wasn’t as big of a tyrant as he made him out to be. He could actually kiss the ground they walked on for forcing him into alcohol duty. If it weren’t for them, he wouldn’t have ran into you and he wouldn’t have known you were attending the party. Now he has something to look forward to that isn't getting shitfaced.

“What the hell are you wearing?”

Haknyeon looks away from his mirror, Hyunjae standing in the doorway. He has a cringe on his face at the sight of his outfit. It wasn’t the worst thing he’s ever worn, but it was… a bit too much. A black button up and black slacks was admittedly not the best frat party fit. The only good thing he had going for him was his hair that was styled for once, parted so his bangs framed his face nicely.

“This girl I’m kinda into is coming tonight. I need to look irresistible.” The younger explains, arms flailing at his sides.

“Okay, well you won’t accomplish that in this,” Hyunjae snorts, digging through his closet. “If she’s into you too, she won’t care what you’re wearing. Just throw on something you’d normally wear. Like… this! This is nice.”

Hyunjae holds up a black t-shirt and a black-washed denim jacket. Haknyeon hums. It was simple, but also once he put it on he wouldn’t feel like a douchebag, which was the whole goal here. Paired with some khaki cargo pants, he’s found a winner. He begrudgingly thanks his senior for the assistance, shooing him out of his bedroom so he can mentally prepare for the night ahead of him.

He doesn’t even know what to bring up now that he really tosses the idea around in his head. Yeah, he wants to learn more about you and what you’re like outside of your Bio lab, but specifically what he couldn’t say. Haknyeon was starting to feel like a lost cause. He had to clutch up tonight. He had to woo you so much that you had no choice but to fall for his cute face and endearing personality. But how was he meant to do that if he couldn’t even come up with topics to talk with you about?

Maybe he was just thinking too far into things. Perhaps he should just let it all go with the flow. Moving at an au natural pace was probably his best bet in comparison to Sunwoo’s soccer ball plan. (He’s still confused how that worked in his favor.)

Before he knows it, the party is swinging into full effect. This is the first time Haknyeon’s ever been so socially aware of his surroundings. He had a habit of blurring his atmosphere at these things, more interested in getting drunk with his buddies than paying attention to the attendees. As he stands in a corner of the living room, listening to Chanhee complain about treasurer stuff, he watches each and every person who enters the house.

When you finally do walk in, he has to physically stop himself from choking on the beer in his cup, biting the rim of the plastic in a weak attempt to sedate himself. If he thought you were gorgeous before in a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt, he doesn’t know what to call you now. You’re laughing at something one of your friends said, dolled up in a black mini skirt and a black cropped halter top while hugging a bottle of Pink Whitney to your chest. He could probably pass out right here right now.

He almost does, but then Chanhee is slapping his back aggressively. “Wipe the drool off of your chin. God, am I the only one who still has a brain?”

“Shut the fuck up, Chanhee, go cry about your life somewhere else.” Haknyeon dismisses his senior, downing the rest of his drink for some liquid courage. Though he is, he doesn’t want to seem too desperate, so he’s not going up to you this quickly. Instead, he heads into the kitchen to get another drink, rolling his neck like he’s preparing for the biggest win of the century.

It’s as he’s pouring some jungle juice into a fresh cup that you see him. A smile similar to the one from the store graces your features. There was only one person with a back like that, and it was your cute lab partner. You keep an arm wrapped around your bottle, tapping his shoulder lightly. He spins around confusedly, but the expression morphs into pleasant surprise immediately after.

“Pink Whitney? Easy choice,” he points at the bottle in your grasp. “Are you a lightweight, Y/N?”

Your cheeks warm up at the teasing remark. Upon first meeting, Haknyeon’s been an awkward mess around you. You can only assume the confidence stems from the fact that he’s within his element. “That’s for me to know, and you to find out.”

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were implying that you want me to get you drunk.” He tucks a hand into one of his jacket pockets, the other bringing his cup to his mouth. He’s unconscious of the source of this sudden bravery, but he prays it doesn’t fade off anytime soon.

“Maybe I do…” You bite your lip, undoing the seal of the Pink Whitney bottle to take a sip. It burns your throat slightly. “I’ve never hung out with a frat boy before. I kinda wanna see what the hype is all about.”

Haknyeon thinks he might pass out again, because if he wasn’t so acutely aware of your entire interaction, he would think you’re flirting with him. Friendliness was a double edged sword in this day and age. But who knows, maybe you are flirting. You showed up with your friends but they were nowhere to be found now. He needed to take advantage of the opening.

It’s around this time that Younghoon and Juyeon are bringing out the fated beer pong table, a crowd already beginning to form nearby. He feels sorry for the poor suckers who have to play Changmin and his girlfriend.

“We should play beer pong!” You suggest, watching the pair of taller guys setting up the cups over his shoulder. Haknyeon can sense the color draining from his face. If it had been anyone else, he would’ve shut the idea down insanely fast, but because it was you, he was genuinely contemplating. Those who went up against the infamous TBZ party beer pong champions were in for a rude awakening, but if you wanted to...

“Uh—“ He starts but then he’s interrupted.

“Yo! Who’s down to play Rage Cage?!”

Juyeon’s voice is somehow louder than the music, carrying into the kitchen where the two of you stand. Haknyeon wasn’t the greatest Rage Cage player, but he enjoyed it a hell of a lot more than beer pong. Especially when he stood beside people who didn’t understand the concept of the game.

You chug some more Pink Whitney, batting your eyelashes up at Haknyeon. “I’ve never played Rage Cage. Is it fun?”

“If you’re next to the right people it can be, but if you aren’t, then it’s a whole lot of drinking. We haven’t played Rage Cage at a TBZ party in a while, but the last time we did Eric Sohn almost had to get his stomach pumped.” He laughs a little at the memory of his friend spending the rest of his night cuddling with a toilet seat. The mental picture overshadows how enticing you look right now.

“Do you think you can teach me?” You ask sweetly, hoping that he takes the hint. He seemed like the type of guy who wouldn’t make the first move unless you forced him to, so it appeared that you had your work cut out for you.

“You wanna play?” He turns to you with wide eyes, almost as if he hadn’t expected you to show interest in the game. You give him a small nod, tucking some hair behind your ear. The truth of the matter was that you were a fucking liar. You’ve played Rage Cage plenty of times in the past. You were actually pretty decent at it, too. You just needed an excuse to spend the night around him.

“We better head over there now. It looks like the table is filling up.” You jab your pinkie in that general direction. Haknyeon blows a raspberry and leads you that way, his hand resting on the small of your back so he won’t lose you in the pack of people surrounding the table.

“Forewarning, my rap sheet doesn’t really read World Class Rage Cage Champ,” he laughs nervously, the anxiety beginning to eat at him all over again. “But I promise, I won’t let you get stacked.”

When Haknyeon said he wasn’t the worst, but wasn’t good at Rage Cage, you took his word. Except he severely overplayed his own skill. Maybe he was just extremely on edge and it threw off his game, but the amount of times he was stacked on was a little comical. At the very least, he kept his promise. You hadn’t got stacked once, but that was also only because Haknyeon would drink for you every time you almost did.

The room is sort of spinning by the time the first game has finished. Playing a drinking game while he’s trying to get to know you better was probably at the higher portion of his ‘BAD IDEAS!!!’ list. If he wasn’t so eager to please and followed along to each of your suggestions, perhaps he’d be having a different conversation. That was not the case, though.

You can’t help but feel a little guilty for the turn out. All you’d wanted was to flirt with your lab partner, possibly end the night with some making out. As it was looking, that’s not the path you were heading down, but rather towards the kitchen for some water to sober him up some. Your bottle of Pink Whitney is long lost, replaced with a bottle of H2O. You hold his chin, tilting it back slightly to pour some into his mouth.

If he hadn’t already had the fattest crush on you, he definitely did now. Pretty and nice? You were the total package. Here you were, nursing him back to sobriety when you could’ve been out and about enjoying yourself with your friends. Up this close, he gets a detailed look at you. It’s so weird for him to think about how much he’s pined after you since the start of the semester, how much he’s admired the face that’s looking at him with this unfamiliar tenderness. He never thought he stood a chance. You know, that whole ‘nice guys finish last’ pick me boy vibe.

“Y/N—” He’s cut short, Juyeon’s voluminous voice resonating throughout the house again, sans the music.

“Everybody who isn’t Tau Beta Zeta, get the fuck out! Someone called the cops!”

Of course. Nobody ever calls the cops on a TBZ party but of fucking course the one time Haknyeon gets shoot his shot with you, someone narcs. He actually thinks he might die. He might keel over and die in the middle of this party while the cops are raiding the place. Lee Sangyeon is gonna be thrown in the back of a police cruiser for letting people drink underage and then send them his way because he bought all of the alcohol. This was just his luck.

Without a word, you grab his hand and drag him out through the back door. You follow the flock of other party goers escaping the wrath of the police. It’s difficult to run in a mini skirt and strappy heels, but you don’t really have room to whine about it. Haknyeon doesn’t know if there’s ever a right time to tell you that you could’ve just gone up to his room, but figures it’s too late when you're hopping the short fence that goes out to the main street of Greek Row.

One would think that he’d sobered up at this point since he was, you know, on the run from the law. Yet for some reason Ju Haknyeon himself doesn’t even know, he’s still feeling the effects of the alcohol, tripping over that stupid fucking fence and falling flat on his face. Thankfully, he lands on the grassy part just before the sidewalk, but it doesn’t make the situation any less embarrassing.

You don’t give him recovery time, pulling him to his feet. He holds a hand to the side of his face that received the harshest of the impact, expecting to wake up to a nasty bruise tomorrow. He’s also unsure where exactly you’re taking him, but is afraid of asking out of fear that you’ll send his ass back to the frat house and have him arrested or something. (He had a bad habit of over complicating situations and coming up with the worst possible scenarios.)

Once the commotion has died out and there’s no one else around, you slow your pace. You turn to face him with a grin, holding both of his hands in yours as you walk backwards. “Are you cool with staying the night at my place?”

Truly, Haknyeon needs to know what act of nobility he committed in his previous life. He needs to go back in time and thank himself for whatever it was. Even with fumble after fumble, he was somehow bouncing back and receiving major compensation for sticking it out. He swallows thickly, nodding dumbly when he realizes he hasn’t given you a proper response.

“Um… Yeah— I mean— yes. That’s fine. That’s totally fine.” He word-vomits, stumbling over his tongue rather than his feet. Being down bad was one of his strongest personality traits. And being clumsy was second strongest, so you don't even have to imagine how terrible a combination of both would be.

The walk to your apartment knocks any lingering inebriation out of his system. He’s entirely too hyper aware of what’s happening as you guide him in that direction. It’s cooler out, the temperature dropping in the nighttime as the end of the semester approaches. If there was another reason to be grateful for this party, it was because he no longer had to worry about not making a move before your last lab together. As much as he despised Biology, he’d take it every day if it meant getting to see you.

He actually feels like he may throw up as you reach your place, his hands sticking into the pockets of his jacket to hide the clamminess of his palms. His nerves are creeping up on him once more, a dark cloud looming over him. He shouldn’t be this jumpy at this point of the night. He should be composed, prepared to sweep you off your feet after spending so much time with you. Why the hell is he sweating bullets right now?

“Welcome to my humble abode,” you curtsy. “Would you like something to drink? Water, maybe?”

“Th-That would be great,” Haknyeon forces out, waddling behind you into the kitchen like a baby duckling following its mother. “You have a nice apartment.”

“Really? Thank you!” You can’t help but giggle at his jitters and the way he keeps rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. A sense of déjà vu rushes over you when you pass him a cup. “Living alone has its perks, I guess. I like that I don’t have to argue with anyone about how to decorate and things like that.”

“It sounds a lot more enjoyable than living with a bunch of men in their early twenties,” he smiles weakly as he accepts the glass of water from you. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to how thin the walls are in that house.”

“Do they have sex often?” You ask him bluntly, head cocking to the side almost innocently. He chokes on the water he just sipped, nearly spilling it onto the floor.

“W-What?” He sputters.

“I’m assuming that’s what you’re talking about,” you shrug, facing away from him so you can grab yourself something to drink, also. “We should get back at them.”

You don’t know how many more bones you can throw for him to understand what you're insinuating. Even the frat boy comment you made earlier was intentional. Haknyeon’s mouth goes dry and his eyes widen like a cartoon character’s. What the fuck?

“I’ve never brought a girl back to the house before, because I don’t want them to make fun of me or something— not that I’m saying I would take you back to the house! I mean I just would feel bad if you also got made fun of— not that I’m referring to having sex with you or anything!” The glass in his hands is on the verge of slipping from his grip. “Not that I don’t want to have sex with you— oh my god— um wow, that’s a very lovely fruit bowl you have there I—“

“Hak,” you interject his rambling, wearing a mischievous smile.

The nickname drives him fucking insane. Scratch him possibly dying. If he isn’t dead by the end of the night, he’ll be shocked. Perplexed. Perturbed. Puzzled. Any shock-adjacent synonym you can think of. That will be him. “Y-Yes?”

“Can you shut up and kiss me already?”

Honestly, you don’t have to ask him twice. His lips are on yours in seconds, fingers fisting the material of your skirt at your hips to steel himself. You moan in response to the sheer frenzy behind his actions. It’s so easy to lose yourself in the haste of it; the way you tug at his hair, the blunt edges of his nails digging into your sides, the near clashing of your teeth. He nibbles at your bottom lip, sighing when you allow his tongue to permeate your mouth. He’s content to do nothing but this, kissing you is enough to satiate the desire he’s harbored for you for months. However, with the franticness of your kiss, he knows you want more.

He inches you both backwards until your lower back hits the counter, and then he’s cupping beneath your thighs to hoist you up. His strength sends tidal waves pulsing throughout your whole being, hurriedly pushing the material of his denim jacket off of his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor without a care. Your hands travel south as his lips trail along your jaw and neck, sucking and biting your supple skin wherever he feels fit. He hisses into the dip where your collarbone meets your shoulder when you palm him through his pants.

“Fuck, babe, you want me bad, don’t you?” He mutters into the column of your throat, teeth sinking into the flesh after.

“Mhmm,” you whine, craning your neck to give him more access to the surface. It’s like a switch has flipped in him and it turns you on unbearably. This is what you’ve been trying to coax out of him all night.

Haknyeon pries apart your legs, slotting himself between them so he can sneak his fingers beneath your skirt. His thumb rubs tight circles into your clothed clit, the lace of your underwear damp with your arousal. He connects your lips again, groaning into your kiss when he moves the fabric aside and slides his knuckle through your folds. You buck up your hips, whimpering when he holds them down with his forearm.

“Want more,” you gasp when he applies a bit of pressure to your sensitive bundle of nerves.

“‘More’ what? Use your words, princess,” he instructs, tracing your entrance with his ring finger.

You shake your head because you’re not even sure what it is that you want. You just know that this isn’t enough to quell the hunger burning at your chest. It’s not nearly sufficient to fan the flames in the depths of your heart or the ache in the pit of your abdomen. You need him everywhere. It’s beyond him being your cute Bio lab partner now.

He urges you onto your elbows, pecking the plane of your stomach. He pushes up your skirt and discards your panties, baring you to the cool air of your apartment. Your eyes flutter shut when he kisses your clit gently. Your head is light and airy and it’s like you’re on cloud nine. Haknyeon hums against you, pulling off to scold you.

“Eyes open, baby,” he nudges his nose on your pelvic bone. “Want you to watch me eat you out.”

The moan you release is strained, like it had been confined in the back of your throat for ages until this moment. He flattens his tongue and licks a line from your hole to your clit, suckling the engorged skin and repeating. Your eyelids are heavy, keeping your intense gaze on him as he all but makes out with your pussy. He focuses his mouth on your clit and slips his middle finger into you. He pumps it in and out languidly, setting a rhythm that matches each swirl of his tongue around your clit.

The whole scene still feels unreal to both of you, like you might wake up from a wet dream or something. How was it possible that Ju Haknyeon was finger fucking you on your kitchen counter? Just a couple days ago, you were sitting side by side in your Biology lab, too nervous to initiate a substantial conversation. You’d think it would be harder to slob on someone’s knob than it would be to talk to them while wearing a fuckass lab coat and goggles.

Haknyeon works his forearm up, pinning down your thighs so your cunt is fully accessible. He adds a second finger to the mix, thrusting them at a higher speed and increasing the unrelenting sucking of your bundle of nerves. He can tell you’re creeping closer towards your climax with the way your walls clench around him and your hips continue to jerk up. And considering the kind of person he was, you figured he would aid you rather than hinder you. But you figured wrong.

He slows his assault, removing his mouth from your clit and leaving the stimulation at just his two fingers. You whine, lip quivering when he looks up into your eyes.

“W-Why are you— what are you doing?” You plead, hating the tone of your voice. The tables have turned, with you sitting beside desperation. This is so unlike you— so unlike the usual domineering aura you exude during sex— your body reacting differently to the power falling through the cracks within your grasp.

“Don’t you wanna savor the moment, princess?” He sounds so cocky, a far cry from the wavering confidence you’d always seen out of him. He kisses the skin of your inner thighs, moving closer and closer to the area you need him most, all the while he continues curling and uncurling his fingers.

The precipice of your orgasm is right there, you can almost taste it on the tip of your tongue. But Haknyeon holds it just out of reach, dangling it in your face like teasing a dog with a chew toy. Tears prick at the corner of your eyes, a false sense of hedonism building and building, then slowly ebbing away each time he retracts. You open your mouth, but no sound comes out.

Just when you’ve given up hope, he adds a third finger and wraps his lips around your clit, sucking harshly. The sudden and unexpected intrusion snaps that familiar cord in half, blinding you with white hot pleasure. The groan that escapes from the base of your chest is guttural, echoing throughout the kitchen. You don’t have it in you to worry about waking your neighbors, especially not when you feel the curve of a smile against your cunt, such an uncharacteristic response from Haknyeon.

Your legs spasm as the height of your orgasm calms. You pull him down for a wanton kiss, tangling your fingers in his hair. He laughs at the role swap, hands flat on the counter to hold him over you. “Feel good?”

“So good, Hak,” you murmur into his lips. “Think you can fuck me like that next?”

“So impatient,” he snickers, pecking along your jaw once more. “But since you’ve been so good for me, I think it’s only fair that I return the favor.”

You clumsily undo the button and zipper of his cargoes, pushing them down with your foot. He steps out of them and kicks them away while simultaneously removing his t-shirt. You take your top off and shimmy out of your skirt, raising an eyebrow at the narrowed look in his eyes. “What?”

“Do you have a condom?”

“No,” you poke your cheek with your tongue. “But, I don’t care if you wear one. I’d rather feel you raw, anyway.”

His forehead drops to your shoulder. “God, you’re killing me. Okay.”

He shoves down his briefs and you have to stop yourself from gawking at his size. While he wasn’t the biggest, he was definitely bigger than anyone else you’ve ever been with. He pumps himself a couple times, guiding his length to your entrance and throwing his head back when the tip presses into you. This was really happening, holy shit. Ju Haknyeon was actually having sex with you.

Your toes curl and you stab your nails into your palms to distract from the stinging stretch. He eases into you with the occasional grunt, minding your expressions for any signs of discomfort. When all he sees is your features contorted to display pleasure, he resumes. By the time he’s bottomed out completely, both of you are moaning messes. You feel so full, stuffed to the brim with the weight of his cock.

“I’ve wanted to be inside of you for so fucking long,” he admits, speaking the words into your sticky skin as he drags himself out only to piston back in. The action throttles you a bit, your eyes tempted to roll to the back of your head from how fucking good it feels. You can’t conjure coherent thoughts to properly convey how many endorphins are coursing through your veins.

Haknyeon sets a pace that combines the perfect amount of speed and depth, the tip of his cock brushing that spot deep in your cunt. Your brain is hazy and your vision blurs, hardly able to see anything in front of you. His mouth attaches to the pulse point on your neck, ensuring he bruises the area.

“Y-You’re— fuck— you’re s-so deep, Hak. I can feel you all over,” you wail, bringing one of his hands to tamp your lower stomach. The pressure contributes to the growing tension of your second orgasm, something you know will collide into you with even more exertion than the first.

“Yeah? You’re taking me s-so well, baby. No one else has ever fucked you this good, right?” Sweat beads on his hairline, dripping down his temples with every thrust of his hips and every drive of his cock into your sweet pussy. Even if he really did somehow manage to die tonight, he could do it with integrity. He could go out with the honor of a fallen soldier knowing that he got to experience this at least once in his life.

He hikes one of your knees up to your chest, burying his dick deeper if humanly possible. You arch your back, pushing into his chest to minimize the space between you, antsy at the promise of another release as mind blowing as the last. He brings you to the edge of the counter so you’re now hip to hip. Haknyeon snakes a hand in the middle of your bodies, using his thumb to rub circles into your clit. That stimulation coupled with the depth of his cock encourages the fluttering of your walls, in turn drawing out the state of bliss you’ve been chasing.

Your vision goes blank, stars painting the behinds of your eyelids. A second orgasm crests upon you and evokes a moan so pornographic, it sounds far away from you. It’s a dreamlike euphoria, an almost out of body experience that puts every other orgasm to shame. The surface of your skin is hot to the touch.

“Where do you want me, princess?” Haknyeon asks breathily. In the calamity of your own release, you nearly forgot about his until you register the twitching inside of you. It pauses the static in your ears, returning the volume of the world to its normality.

“Cum inside of me,” you whine, the overstimulation becoming too much to handle. He doesn’t need to be told another time, grip tightening on your thigh as he spills into your cunt.

The two of you stay still for a moment, allowing clarity to flow into your brains. You wince when he finally has half the mind to pull out, his nose scrunching up at the sensitivity. He slides his underwear back on, extremely conscious of how naked he is right now. He has an inkling that you were anticipating that this would happen, because why else would you ask him to stay over tonight? But, he is the Ju Haknyeon that you’ve sat next to this entire semester in your Biology lab. So he couldn’t just march forward without a little overthinking and self deprecation.

“Do you still want me to stay?” His voice has reverted back to that small, unsure tone. You sit up quickly, alarmed by the twinge of disappointment underneath it.

“Of course, I do,” you pout, kissing his cheek and lacing your fingers together. “I’ve had a crush on you since the beginning of the year, Hak. Sure, maybe I skipped a couple steps in between, but I have wanted this so badly— I have wanted you so badly— for you don’t even know how long.”

He chuckles, tucking some hair behind your ear. He leaves a sweet kiss on your lips, softer and gentler than the ones from earlier that night. He’s intentional with the way he glides them in harmony, like he was following the melody of the most beautiful song. “Oh trust me, I think I have an idea.”

© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.

[bad268]

Hii I was the one who requested the kimi x figure skater reader and I loved it so much! Thanks for writing it. If it's okay I'd like to request another kimi fic, I have a few ideas but just pick smth if you want haha I'm not picky.

1. Set in the same universe as the first figure skater one, except this time it's reader trying to teach kimi to skate

2. Same as 1. Except its kimi and reader going karting (or just a general reader haha doesn't have to be figure skater)

3. Literally anything where kimi is comforting a reader with bad period cramps (in person, over the phone idc tbh haha)

Thanks so much in advance, I'd really love to read more of kimi since there's so little on him :) (specifically by you cos I love your writing style)

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better (Andrea Kimi Antonelli X Figure Skater! Reader)

Go for the Gold Universe

Fandom: RPF/F2/F3

Requested: Clearly (I literally love you <3 this is 1 and 2, 3 will be out June 29 <3)

Warnings: Aged up Kimi

POV: Second Person (You/your)

W.C. 1433

Summary: Kimi and the reader teach each other their strengths.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Pinterest)

Being back on the ice was a little bit of a change. It felt like you were relearning to skate all over again. You weren’t attempting any turns or jumps yet. You were simply getting used to being back on the ice. Your physical therapist thought it would be a good idea to strengthen your legs again by putting a brace on you and sending you off. Kimi was there too just in case you fell or something happened. 

You were just lacing up your skates when your trainer came over to help with the knee brace.

“We’re just gonna skate around,” They said as they tightened the straps around your legs. “Absolutely no jumps. Just focus on going straight and alternating pressure on both legs. Maybe at the end, I’ll let you do a camel spin on your non-injured leg.”

“Are you gonna be on the ice with me?” You asked, bending your knee and testing it out as you stood up. You made it to the opening of the rink before staying at the wall and looking back at your trainer. 

“No, but I think you’ll like who’s going out with you more,” They responded as they grabbed their iPad and stood at the wall. You looked at them confused before you saw Kimi sitting on the bench. Your face lit up as you ran as fast as you could back over to the bench.

“You’re going out with me?” You asked excitedly as you grabbed his hand away from his skates. “I didn’t even know you could skate!”

“I can’t,” He said simply as he struggled to tie the skates again. “You’ll teach me right?”

“Of course I will,” You replied as you took over lacing his skates. He had made them too loose, so you relaced them. He did not need to get injured. Not on your watch.

“Good, I know how much you love your jumps and fancy moves, so we thought distracting you with teaching me would make you focus on something else,” Kimi explained while you finished off the laces.

“You’re geniuses,” You laughed as you helped him stand up, making sure to grip his forearms when he started wobbling. “Come on, one step at a time.”

“I thought it was bad to walk on the blades,” Kimi said off-handily as he walked with you to the opening for the rink. 

“No, it’s not good to walk on them. It’ll dull the blades,” You explained as you stepped onto the ice. You leaned down to pull off the skate guards as you stepped each foot onto the ice. You left Kimi to lean against the wall as you showed him your guards. “These protect the blades. They make it so we can walk to and from the bench without dulling the blades, and they make for safe storage. You would hate to reach into your bag and slice your hand because your blades were out in the open.”

“You make a good point,” He chuckled as he pulled his guards off and followed you onto the ice, almost falling immediately. “I was not expecting it to be so slippery.”

“It’s ice, what did you expect?” You chuckled as you tightened your hold on him, moving your hands from his forearms to around his waist. “Just lock your ankles and we’ll take baby steps.”

“That’s easier said than done,” Kimi sighed with an eye roll. “I deserve to be compensated for my pain.”

“How about this,” You started as you began skating backward, pulling him along with you, “I teach you to skate, and you can teach me to drive, race car or street car. It’ll be fun and bring us closer.”

“I’m not planning to throw you in my Prema car,” Kimi pressed as he eyed you wearily as you came up to the edge of the rink and started to turn them. “But if you make me fall, I won’t hesitate to take you on a hot lap!”

“Maybe if your legs stopped shaking, we’d be fine,” You teased as you slowed down for the turn. No matter how much you slowed, Kimi wobbled and started frantically trying to stay upright. You, just as frantically, tried to grab his arms to help him stay upright. “If you keep doing that, you’re gonna-”

You knew this was going to happen. Just as you grab onto Kimi’s forearms enough to help stabilize him, he falls backward, flat on the ice with a smack. You didn’t know whether to laugh or ask if he was okay, but as soon as you met his eye, you burt out laughing. 

“Just for that, you’re driving my Prema car,” He scowled with no real heat behind it.

“Okay,” You chuckled lightly as you met his eyes again, “If I crash your car, oh well, right?”

“I clearly did not think this through,” Kimi mumbled to himself before switching his attention back to you. “Wait, are you okay? Is your knee okay? I didn’t mean to pull you down with me! I swear-”

“Kimi,” You interrupted gently as you kissed his cheek, “I’m fine. It’s a little fall, and it’s not like we did anything to strain my leg.” You gently pushed yourself back up, helping Kimi stand up as well. “How about we take a break? Hot chocolate sounds good to me.”

A couple of months later, you’re physical therapy for your knee was completed, and you were cleared to go karting. It took a little bit of convincing your coach, but eventually, you and Kimi convinced them. It was only fair since they made Kimi get on the ice with you. 

“Can you help me?” You asked, struggling to fasten the helmet straps. Kimi let you use one of his older helmets since this was your first time, and to be honest, he thought it was cute. It was similar to how some people feel when they see their significant others in their clothes, but this was Kimi’s personalized helmet. It was more meaningful. 

He chuckled as he walked up to you, and quickly fasted the helmet tightly to your head. He double and triple-checked to make sure it fit you right. Safety was his number one priority. He gently tapped the top of the helmet before opening the visor for you.

“You know the basics, right?” Kimi asked as he led you over to the karts. They were pretty simple ones, just to get you comfortable with driving before throwing you off the deep end.

“Right pedal, gas, left is the brakes, and left left is the clutch,” You sighed with an eye roll and a smirk as you sat down in the kart. 

“Good enough,” He chuckled as he leaned down to be at eye level with you. “I’ll be right behind you. If you feel scared or you want to stop, we can switch to a double-seater, and go from there. I’ll be the only other one on track with you, and trust me, you’ll hear me before you see me.”

“That’s just because the karts are loud,” You chuckled lightly as you test out turning the wheel. “Is it supposed to be this tight?”

“Yes, there’s no power steering in karts. These are just basic chassis,” Kimi explained. “It’s a lot easier when your wheels are moving.”

“Okay, anything else I should know before we go out?” You asked, masking your fear.

“If you crash, which I don't think you will, but if you do, brace for it and take your hands off the wheel. I have a feeling you’re not planning on going fast enough to hit a wall, but if it happens, take your hands off first and put your hands here,” Kimi explained before pausing to grab your hands and cross them against your chest, putting your hands on their opposing shoulders. “This will brace you the best in these kinds of karts. Are you ready?”

“Ready to beat your ass? Absolutely,” You said with a cocky smile. You knew what you were getting into, but you also knew that you needed to be a little (a lot) confident in yourself to do good. Especially when you’re racing against a Formula 1 driver. 

“YOu think you’re gonna beat me?” Kimi chuckled lowly as he got into his own kart beside you.

“Oh please,” You dismissed, “Anything you can do, I can do better.”

“No, you can’t.”

“Yes, I can.”

“Okay, we’ll see about that,” Kimi challenged as you both pulled your karts forward as the stewards said so. “May the best driver win.”

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[raineandsky]

Imagine a hero x villain where the villain is kind of inept, and he basically has one last attempt to convince supervillain he's worthy of his job (and possibly life tbh), and he comes across a badly injured hero. This starts a long con where he ingratiates himself with her, slowly learning details to her powers (think Black Canary's scream), only to sell her out to supervillain. But it turns out he ... might have grown a little fond of her.

Probably a really basic idea. 😅

there's no basic ideas in this house - we like what we like!! thank you for the request as always :)

His whole plan was leading up to this moment. Why is he stalling?

The villain stands outside the supervillain’s door. He should be in there, should be explaining his master plan the he knows the supervillain will love, but no—here he is, lingering outside like a wimp.

He knows why he’s lingering. Of course he does, it’s been pretty hard to avoid.

He found a hero. Injured, weak, vulnerable. He took her in and helped her recover, all under the guise of some concerned civilian who just so happened to know emergency first aid. She was unsure at first; closed off, speaking only to thank him for the food he brought her and the bandages he wound around her injuries.

Then she got comfortable. Talked about her work, the other heroes, how her power worked—her sonic blast, to give it a name. She demonstrated on his poor mug, his favourite, and beamed when the villain showered her in praise and amazement. As heroes do.

She got better, returned to the agency, but not without the stab of affection the villain had managed to plant in her.

The hero returned, of course. Talks of heroism turned into talks of life—her cat was probably eating all her food, heroism made her awful lonely, his sofa was cosy with a blanket over her lap and the fireplace crackling in front of her, could he draw her, please? The villain had tried to play his pad of notes—notes on her—off as a sketchbook before, and was suddenly deeply regretting it.

The drawing’s still in there. He’s been looking at it, with all its wonky lines and uneven pen marks, as he pieced together his plan. Maybe too much. It’s clearly had an effect.

Dammit, now he’s thinking about it again—thinking about her. All he should be thinking about is how he can manipulate the information out of her for the supervillain’s gain. All he can think about is the movie night they’ve planned for this evening.

The supervillain appears at the end of the corridor. He eyes the villain for an awkward moment before he says, “Everything alright, [Villain]?”

Come on, do it. No, don’t. The villain shuffles on his feet. “Yeah. Could I grab you for a meeting quickly?”

The supervillan’s expression only gets more quizzical but he doesn’t say no. He opens his office door and ushers the villain inside with a sigh.

He flops down in his chair, gesturing idly for the villain to start. The villain flips his notepad open, his speech laid out in his mind. I’ve integrated myself into [Hero]’s life. With a little pushing, think of what we could find out! He glances down at the page for inspiration.

The notepad has been open on this page too much recently. It flips itself, irritatingly, to that godawful 30 second drawing, and any words the villain was gearing up to say die on his tongue.

He showed it to the hero with a grimace and she laughed. Loud, unabashed. Like someone who isn’t afraid of who she is. “Looks just like me!” she cried. “It’s no Picasso, sure, but it was by you, so that must count for something!”

The lines are even more crooked than he remembered. Jesus, why did he keep this? It doesn’t do her justice.

“[Villain]?”

The villain looks back up like he just remembered where he is. He did, honestly. He was more than a little lost in his own thoughts. Thinking about her like some irritating fly that just won’t take the hint away no matter how much you swat it.

“Yeah, I, uh, yeah.” Flawless start. The villain clears his throat and flips the pad closed. “I just, uh, thought I’d say that whatever you’ve done with the light bulbs is good. It’s, uh, brighter. In here. In all the rooms.”

The supervillain stares at him blankly. “Is that… what this was about?”

No! “Yeah.”

The supervillain has never had less emotion on his face than right now. “Okay.”

“Okay,” the villain echoes, and with a quick nod he turns on his heel and gets the hell out of there.

The halls are quiet, thankfully. The villain lobs the notepad in the first bin he finds, and after taking three steps he grumbles to himself and pulls it back out and tears the drawing out and replaces the pad in the bin.

He might as well just go home. He has a movie night to set up anyway, and he needs to rob the corner store of all the popcorn they have.

[rodolfoparras]

Alec I'm so severely unwell over that drabble you wrote, I'm like super emotional about it please-

I wanted to make Nik into catty asshole who is trying to push your buttons and make you jealous maliciously but like...the idea of him just teasing both you and John is better almost.

Like sure part of him is jealous and he can't help but to be little petty but for the most part he is just pushing your buttons for the sake of riling you up. Even better if he sees that you and John are in love with each other but neither you or John see it. And he's little hurt sure, he doesn't exactly see why John would pick some punk ass rookie over him but as long as John is happy...

And he knows John most likely won't make the first move because John is probably all types of upset because he fell for someone he took under his wing to keep safe and take care of so Nik does everything he can to make you jealous (he totally plays into your hot-headed nature) so you'll finally confess.

At some point absolutely everyone is aware it and is just waiting for something to happen because holy fuck can Captain and rookie just fuck already? Why do they keep dreamily staring into each other's eyes while we're trying to have mission briefing?

For extra angst, imagine you finally finally deciding to confess, probably after drinking and getting all hyped up and you come to John's office and you're about to know but... John is there with Nikolai and maybe they're fucking, maybe they're just having sweet moment, maybe it's just misunderstanding on your part. Whatever it is, it doesn't mean anything but to you it does because it just reaffirms that John isn't yours.

I imagine it's not until everyone gets hammered or near death situation that confession finally happens tbh.

-🔮

Okay hear me out

Nikolai wasn’t stupid. He was aware that Price likes you, not because he had told him so, because the Russian is sure that the other man would rather die than answer honestly to that question

But he could see the way price acted around you, the way he talked to you, the way he behaved nothing like when Nik and him were together.

Price and Nik had met in their early teens, Price thought Nik was his first and last love Nik, simple put, didn’t feel the same.

Sure he loved Price, dont get it wrong, but there was so much to the world than being bound to one person for the rest of your life.

So they decided to break up, only ever hooked up for the sake of old times or the surge of adrenaline that came after a mission.

Price was so hung up over Nik, the Russian never though he’d get over him but one day the rookie became all he talked about, most of their hm-meetings got called off because he needed to be with rookie for the night.

Nikolai was sure Price would fess up any time soon but Price didn’t, instead he played stupid every time he got asked about it.

So he tried another approach, targeting you by making you jealous in hopes of that being enough to make you fess up but instead it pushed you further away.

Nik almost pulled his hair out, flying a plane was much easier than getting two people together so he gave up, let universe handle it instead.

In the meantime 141 was up your ass about it, telling you that it’s so clear that the captain reciprocates your feelings.

For one second you had allowed yourself to believe it. With one too many drinks in your system you had stumbled over to Price’s office in an attempt to confess your feelings.

However what you saw had shattered your heart.

Stupid, stupid so stupid you think to yourself tears trickling down your cheeks as you sprint to you room, far away from Price’s office.

Of course Price didn’t return your feelings he was busy getting fucked by the man he was actually in love with.

Yet you had allowed yourself to be persuaded, had let 141 convince you that Price reciprocated your feelings.

However what you don’t see is Price’s attempt to run after you only for Nik to stop him.

“What is he going to think? Fuck!” Price says kicking the trash can laying around in his office, still half naked.

“John cal-“ Nik tries to say but gets interrupted by the older man.

“Don’t Nikolai just please leave, please? I would like to be alone for a moment”

Nik wants to argue but instead he lets out a sigh and picks up his clothes off of the floor, quickly dressing himself before walking out through the door.

“You should tell him you know?” Nik says with a smile on his face. Price doesn’t even get to spit out an impromptus lie about how he doesn’t like you in that way before Nik is walking away.

The opportunity to talk doesn’t come around. His days are filled with missions and his nights are filled with paper work that just seem to be piling up and when the two of you have some sort of interaction Price doesn’t even know what to say because it’s not like the two of you are anything in the first place.

He did nothing wrong by fucking Nik he was just lonely and tired of pining for the man who doesn’t even seem to noice him. But then that very same man walked in at the wrong moment and everything came crashing down on him.

Stupid stupid so stupid, Price thinks to himself as he sulks in silence.

Weeks have passed after that incident, the two of you are distant as ever.Price thinks that maybe it’s meant to be this way, you weren’t even anything in the first place.

But just as the thought pops up in his head there’s blood - your blood splashing across his face and you’re falling to the ground while he rushes towards your bleeding body

You’re muttering i love you’s while he’s carrying you to the emergency room and Price is repeatedly saying that he won’t say it back not yet because this isn’t a goodbye and if you’re going to confess your love for him you have to ask him out on dinner first, you have to be alive and well when you do it, goddammit!

Spitball w/ me?

[eloise175]

With the release of chapter 138 of the manhwa, we got to see the first attempt at brainwash up close, and also how Penelope’s suspicions cement themselves as true. Time for another chapter analysis and theory-crafting session RAAAAH 🦅🦅 (be mindful that it contains spoilers!)

We’ve seen before how Penelope had this idea that the Laila was Ivonne, and it appears that she’s becoming more and more convinced of it.

Penelope is very much creeped out by this, and also doesn’t feel inclined to interact with ‘Ivonne’ more than necessary since this signals the ending of hard mode approach. Though that does not stop ‘Ivonne’ from trying to get close to her…or better yet, to play victim whenever Penelope’s around, to try and make it pass off as Penelope’s doing, with fake tears and everything.

After a conversation, which Penelope cuts short (understandable), ‘Ivonne’ tries to follow her but trips and falls. To someone else it might look like Penelope might’ve done it (that is exactly what ‘Ivonne’ aims at).

Penelope catches her mid-fall, and notices with dread for the second time that ‘Ivonne’ is unnaturally cold, just as you’d expect a corpse to be.

This is the part where Penelope gets overwhelmed; it hits her that this might truly not be the real Ivonne and so Penelope tells her to pretend like she doesn’t exist, she’s basically telling her to do whatever she wants because she won’t intervene with her plans.

This is where you can see how things are starting to affect Penelope mentally, but also physically as she will become increasingly thinner because she avoids meals to not be anywhere near the ‘real daughter’.

During this, Reynold comes back from training assumedly, and something interesting happens with him, something that can be seen in his eyes, basically that strange glow.

His change in demeanor is very odd, as he tells Penelope off for whatever reason, accusing her of wanting to hit Ivonne all along. It all spirals when he uses Penelope’s past against her, aka what she told him in the attic, saying that her behavior is the motive she isn’t treated as an Eckhart.

It makes something in Penelope snap, because she actually had high hopes for Reynold, but in the end she got disappointed again. Her words “You haven’t changed at all.” get Reynold out whatever trance he was in and he follows after her where he apologizes for having misunderstood. This is where the chapter ends currently.

From here the theory-crafting/speculating starts.

Some time ago, SUOL-nim made a post on her Twitter/X account where she posted this image:

This is one of those moments when you applaud the artist for their great attention for details, because if you look closely there’s a pattern going on. Both Reynold and Derrick have this pink highlight at the bottom of their eyes, but when you look at Ivonne, she has a green highlight.

I was suspicious when I first saw it, but looking at it now, it was obviously overshadowing.

We can see it more clearly here, right under her pupils where the green spots appear. It looks unnatural and artificial, almost as if it wasn’t meant to be there in the first place.

It could be related to the glow that appears in Reynold’s eyes when he is under the control of the brainwash.

I think that Reynold wasn’t supposed to break free of the brainwash here. But when he does shake off the effects of the mind control, you can see how his gaze changes from indifferent/angry, back to normal.

When there’s that unnatural glint in his pupil, his eyes look lifeless, with most of the light having been sucked away from them, and the usual pinkish highlights turn a murky grey. Even the blue’s shade looks darker and more muted.

Maybe this might be the initial stage of the brainwash? What if it changes and becomes even more evident the longer the target is under the effects of the brainwash?

Tbh I’m curious to see how the others’ eyes changes under the effects of the brainwash and how they look even while resisting it. After the greenhouse scene (which is going to be in the upcoming episodes) it is hinted that Callisto seemed to resist being brainwashed, can’t wait for that.

[l0vergirlatheart]

Can I request the jealousy reactions from the Victims of Mandela Catalogue? I read your other post of victims reacting to receiving affection my heart just absolutely soared. If it’s too complicated, don’t do it. :]

HOLY SHIT MY FIRST REQUEST!!! HIHIHI<333

ofcofc, if it's on my masterlist then I'll def. write it <3 love the victims frfr

also ty for the compliments, got me melting over here💕

c.w // jealousy (obv..), d/ckhead (?) in mark's part ngl, also really oblivious reader

JEALOUS MUCH?

start under cut.

MARK HEATHCLIFF

look at the goofy lil skrunkly

he doesn't get jealous easily

or in general

but...

if you're skipping or canceling hangouts with him just to see someone else constantly...

well, you'll see--

"Hey (Y/N)!" Mark called out behind you. You'd been walking around with (?), and he just happened to be close by.

"Hey Mark." You greeted with a smile as he jogged up to be by your side.

"Who's this?" He asked, pointing at (?).

"Ah! This is (?), my new friend! We've been hanging out a lot!" You exclaimed, and Mark nodded, smiling. But then, (?) locked arms with you and leaned into your side.

"Yeah, me and (Y/N) have been hanging out pretty much everyday this month, only besides the short 2 days when she was hanging out with you." (?) said, with a condescending smirk on their face as they stared down at Mark.

"..I see." He turned to look at you, "Is this the one who keeps having you cancel the hangouts?"

"I don't force (Y/N) to do anything, I think they just like a little better than you--" (?) started.

"I'm sorry? I don't like any of my friends more than the other!! You're all my friends, so I like you all equally!! Please don't pick another fight, (?).." You interjected. (?) just rolled their eyes and looked back at Mark.

"We've got somewhere to be right now, so goodbye." (?) said turning around and attempting to take you with them.

Mark grabbed you other arm softly and pulled you out of (?)'s arm lock, and silently lead you two away from (?).

yeah..

ya'll just left (?) in the middle of nowhere

oh well

skill issue

CESAR TORRES

go homosexual alternate go!!

yeah he's technically an alternate the entire timeline so...

he's one here too

since alternates don't usually feel, well, feelings

jealousy is new to Cesar

he has no idea why he gets that clenching feeling in his stomach when he sees you with (?), all close and even just slightly touching

and that voice telling him to just take you away from them is getting louder and louder

so what does he do?

he listens to it.

There you were, laughing with (?). You two had just gotten back from a fun time at a carnival in the next town over, and (?) was walking you home.

"Oh! Remember how scared you were on the Ferris wheel? Your face was priceless!" You laughed, covering your mouth with your hand.

"Oh, shut up!" (?) said, nudging you with their elbow.

"You know--" You started, but then (?) stopped moving and laughing. They were staring at something straight ahead in fear; you followed their eyes to see Cesar, standing ahead, just a couple feet away. The only thing that really scared (?) was that half of his face was missing besides his eye.

yeah safe to say your friend ran away

"why'd you--"

"I missed you."

yeah he took you away after that <3

away as in home

ya'll had a fun time there doing whatever it is you do with someone

idk i havent had human contact in years leave me alone /hj

JONAH MARSHALL

cute and goofy. perfect combo. just add in some stupid.

↑ recipe to make ur very own jonah

anygays

he is very goofy

so it seems impossible for him to get jealous right??

wrong.

he gets jealous very easily

and constantly tbh

he'll just pout at you and whoever he's jealous of

You were sitting at a restaurant with Jonah and (?). You and (?) had been chatting the entire time since they sat across from you, and the normally very loud Jonah was dead silent.

"Yeah so then I--" (?) started, but you stopped listening after a second because you felt something tug at your (shirt/sweater) sleeve. You looked next to you to see a pouting Jonah, with his cheeks all puffed out and goofy lil' mad face. <333

"How come you're not talking to me too??" He whined quietly, and you just had to let out a small giggle.

you had to let him in on the convo

he was back to normal in no time

when you guys left he was very clingy tho

no im not showing favoritism wdym

ADAM MURRAY

lets pretend adam wasnt a fr d/ckhead in the last volume ngl

he is chill

...sometimes

if he's woken up on the wrong side of the bed or sum

then he will get jealous quickly

not as fast as jonah but still

pretty fast

"Yeah so what movie did you want to watch?" You asked (?). You were at your house, and were going to have a movie marathon together.

"I was thinking.."

Little did either of you know, a groggy and grumpy Adam had entered the room, not have founding you anywhere in the other room with him.

"what're you doing?" he said, shocking both you and (?).

"HOLY SHIT ADAM-- You scared us!!" You said, whipping your head back to see him right behind the sofa.

"So?"

"sighh... we're having a movie marathon."

"Move over then, I'm joining."

he had his arms wrapped around you the entire time

silently pulling you closer and closer to him

he kept going 'till you two reached the edge farthest from (?)

poor (?)

they just wanted to watch movies

adam probably dragged you away to make popcorn with him lmfao

END

fandom masterlist

req. guidelines

[goldengroovy]

EERM ERM MC DOINH REN'S HAIR

how one doth formulate a request i am unsure but i am speaking my truth here

mc giving her nice braids or buns or sjomthing in step two but shes super awkward about it cus she has a little crush on mc and secretly also likes how pretty she feels with it

is this anything tbh i dont know but I LIVE FOR RENEE MURRAY!!!

Renee Murray x GN! reader !

A/N at the end <3

The two of you were at Ren’s place. She hasn’t invited anyone but Qiu and Baxter inside, which explains her parents’ smug looks as she brought you to her room. 

Ren had the great idea of you two hanging out together in her room, playing with her new console. But, instead, when she walked up to you, she got nervous and asked you if you wanted to do homework in her room instead. Surprisingly, you accepted.

Too much of a coward to back out, she had to follow through and actually do her homework. Not as fun, but being with you made things a little bearable. 

Ren was sat on the floor, with her back leaning against her bed, which you were laying upon. She frowned at your placements, as it means that she can’t just stare at your face and space out. Which is something she totally doesn’t do a lot.

Suddenly, her disappointment went away.

Your hands were fidgeting with Ren’s hair. Your hands just barely lingered around her neck, and she felt her cheeks get hot at that. She doesn’t know why you’re playing with her hair, but she also doesn’t know how to ask you to not stop. 

It was a weird dilemma. 

“Your hair feels so nice, Ren.” You said. 

“Thanks.” Her voice was quiet. This was the most relax she’s ever been, and she was honestly struggling to say anything at all. So this is why the girls in her class did this, it was the best feeling in the world.

You started to hum a tune, and she leaned back and her breathing slowed down as she fully focused on your voice. Maybe this was a tad better than playing with her new console.

“It’s done!” You said.

Ren suddenly opened her eyes, and honestly, she wasn’t even sure when she closed them.

“Hm?” Her curiosity did not triumph over her relaxation. You giggled, knowing that she was one second away from falling asleep.

Suddenly, you brought out your phone, and she saw her image on the screen.

Ren’s first thought was that she looked.. A little dumb. Her hair was in two braids that fell off her shoulders. Braids don’t look good on her like they did in the other girls in class.

But the more she looked, the more she felt giddy. She felt… her mind was blank for a while, trying to find the word that’s on the tip of her tongue. And then glanced to her left, and saw you right next to her shoulder, smiling at her fondly. 

Then she realized it. 

Pretty. 

You make her feel pretty.

“So?” You asked, wanting even a glimpse of what was going on in her mind. “You like it?”

Ren turned around, finally looking at you. 

“Yeah.” She smiled. “ I like it.” I like you.

“That’s good!” You cheered, pumping a fist in the air. “You want to do my hair?” 

Before Ren could answer, you had jumped down from her bed, and sat down in front of her. Her hands nervously hovered around your head, until you gave her a thumbs up. She took a deep breath in, took a small strand, and started. 

Her hands shook, because you were close, you smelled really nice, and your hair was soft. You were all she could think of. 

“Hm,” You turned your head around, confused. “Do you not know how to braid?”

Ren opened her mouth to answer, but no words came out. So, she looked to the side and shyly nodded. 

“It’s okay.” You gently said, and you always spoke softly when it came to Ren. It made her feel weird, in a nice way. You make her feel ‘nice’ weird. 

You learned your head back, placing it on her shoulder, and making yourself comfortable as you rested against her. 

“I’ll just teach you tomorrow.” 

A/N: HELLOETH IT IS I, BODY OF WATER!! i don't knoweth the speeches of fancy, so i apologeth for this attempt

as soon as i saw this request, the power of lesbianity had possessed me and i had to write this acutally.

I LOVE RENEE AND HER CHARACTER.. i had to physically restrain myslef to not write a confession scene. anywyas, was also about to add another scene of renee going to MC and asking them to braid her hair.. and MC claling her pretty but unfortunately i wasnt sure how to ease the scene into that </33

ANYWAYS AS ALWAYS REQUESTS ARE OPEN!1 and to those who requested b4, know that i probably finished ur requests like halfway lol. i love having multiple projects because i procrastinate a project by working on another project.

ALSO WOWZERS IM TURNING 16 IN A WEEK ISNT THAT COOL... omg that means i'd be the same age as step 2 renee.... i think

BYE BYE !!1

[shadowbriar]

Regulus Black - Supermassive Black Hole IV

Pairing : Regulus Black x (she/her) Selwyn!Reader Word Count : 4.2k Warning : Food. Height. Fluff. Synopsis : A simple arrangement turned into an everlasting one as two naïve children try to figure out their heart. Notes : I'm sorry it's taking forever for me to post this, I had a change of heart of how the plot should go and tbh I still dk how to end this story so bear with me please. If you'd like to be tagged for the next chapters, please comment or reblog so I can add you to the tag list. If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕ Taglist: strikethrough means I could not tag you. @lostarc24 @hogwartshouse @milivanili99 @stelleduarte @40rimm @lilmaymayy @mischiefmanagers

↞ Part III

Regulus rolled over to the other side of the bed for the millionth time now. His eyes were staring at the clock by the bedside table, watching as its hands moved and ticks with every second passed. He knew that he had to get up, sooner or later, be it from the knock on his door or the unbearable hunger in his stomach. He barely ate last night. His head was spinning, heavy from the unpleasant memories and regret of his once again apathetic gesture towards her.

It must’ve been her worst birthday party. He spoiled it all the moment he walked in on her and Rosier. Perhaps he should have minded his own business. She has all the right to kiss Rosier if she wanted to, it’s the least bit of freedom he could give to her, but Regulus couldn’t help but feel a little bit triumphant when she seemed to be uninterested in him. That she too finds the idea of kissing Rosier to be baffling.

A loud groan escapes his lips when the next memory floods in. Regret beyond imagination is sticking to his skin like a muck. He wonders what would happen if he did what she asked him, if he would just lean in and kiss her. Would that be a great gift he could’ve given to her? Or would it’ve been a one way ticket to hell for him?

Reaching for his jumper, Regulus finally stood up and walked out of the room. He figures it would be worse to have her knocking on his door than to face her willingly. He could perhaps piece some words to meet her with a cool head than to have him caught red handed.

“Morning,” He greets her as he reaches the dining table.

She looks up to see him, her shoulders slightly tense and it makes Regulus bite his inner cheek a little harder, “Morning.”

Regulus kept his lips in a tight line. He took a seat opposite of her. His fingers locked to each other, an attempt to soothe himself as his brain tries to make some coherent explanation. It proves to be a harder task to do each day whenever she is in the equation.

“Listen, about last night—”

“You’re right,” She cuts in “I was drunk. I didn’t know what I was saying so if we could just.. Forget about what I said, I think that would be best for us all.”

Regulus opens his mouth, wanting to argue with her but finds himself nodding and turning silent, trying to ignore the loud cracking of his heart. Her words twisted a knife in his heart. Somehow he hoped that his words were lies, that she was sober and she really wanted him to kiss her. It wasn’t like he saw her drink anything, anyway. But who was he kidding? There would be no chance in this universe that she would want him to kiss her. No chance. None.

She flashes him a small smile before looking back down to her toasts.

Now what? Regulus thought. Where does it leave them at? He knew that he still owes her an explanation. About the Greengrass, about Rosier, about everything, but is right now the best time to bring it up? And what could he say about it? The truth? Would that do them better or worse?

“Do you have any plans for the day?” Regulus finds himself asking.

She pinched her brows, shaking her head, “I don’t think so, no.”

He hums in acknowledgement.

“Well actually, there’s this theme park I wanted to go to with Sirius.”

Regulus nods, finding himself to be more heartbroken, “Right.”

“But if you’d like to come—,”

“Yes.” He says, a little bit too excited for his liking.

“—I can cancel on Sirius.”

Regulus clears his throat, attempting to conceal his embarrassment as her brows rise. His excitement was surely out of character. Something the reserved, quiet, and collected Regulus never does. But then again, he could never be his usual apathetic self whenever it comes to her now, could he?

He wonders what her pinched brows and confused eyes mean. Was it really that appalling that he wanted to go to the theme park with her? Was it wrong of him to show excitement for her offer?

She blinks. Seemingly taken aback to his agreement but her smile slowly blooms. A sight that would be replayed in his head repeatedly before he sleeps tonight, “Alright.”

—-

She finds her teeth slightly chattering from the cold. The weather was playing with her. It was bright and hot when they first came out of the house, but now that the sun is slowly retreating, the wind blows stronger and colder. She was never good with coldness in the first place but she certainly didn’t think it would be this cold tonight. Her thin layer of flannel did not help to preserve warmth and she knew she was pretty much screwed for the rest of the night.

Her knuckles were turning white, body shuddering as she tried to gain some warmth. She could see Regulus glancing at her every once in a while but he never said a word. She knew that he could tell that she was freezing. Hands burrowed deep into the pocket of his coat, Regulus is warm and cosy under his thick layer of wool coat and it's surely shredding all of her dignity to say it but Regulus was right, she should’ve brought a coat.

“Quite the gentleman, you are.” She remarks between her chatter.

“One warm gentleman, indeed.” He says, snuggling into his coat as he sighs “The weather is so nice tonight.”

She glares, certainly not appreciating his sarcasm.

“I’ve told you to bring a coat,” He says as a matter of factly “I’m not going to give you mine, just because you’re cold now. Even if you’re freezing yourself to death and begging me for it.”

“Oh just how chivalrous of a man you are, Regulus.”

He shrugs, buttoning his coat and snuggling deeper to it.

“I am not cold and I most certainly will not ask for your coat.” She replies, her anger giving her the slight raise of temperature “Don’t worry your infuriating little mind about me, Reg.”

Regulus smiles jubilantly, nodding.

She turns to look away, finding herself conflicted once again with his charms. On one side she wanted to slap that enchanting little smirk off of his face but a bigger part of her wanted to take a picture of him and keep it in her pocket. 

Regulus has been smiling a lot today, so she noticed. He was beautiful. More beautiful than she remembered him. Perhaps it was due to the fact that she could stare on his face straight on instead of stealing glances like she used to or perhaps Regulus has just simply been enjoying their time, she couldn’t really tell. All she knew is that he looks beautiful this way and she hoped he would show this side more to her.

Now they’re standing in line, waiting for their turn to try on the rollercoaster. Regulus notes lazily that it wouldn’t be much worse than flying for quidditch. He’s played some of the most brutal games as a Slytherin quidditch player, but James said that rollercoasters are worse than flying and she told him exactly that. 

“You can hold my hand if it’s too scary for you.” Regulus said as they put on their seatbelt.

If he didn’t have that mocking smirk on his face she would have let herself blush and enjoy the butterflies in her stomach, but instead she rolled her eyes, “You wish.”

But boy, how right James is.

Regulus seemed to be having the time of his life through the loops of the track as she screamed her lungs and clung onto him for dear life. He was laughing, happy cheers escaping his lips. If she wasn’t fighting for her life she would’ve been hypnotised by the happy scream Regulus was shouting. Funny how the one time Regulus truly enjoys their shared moment is when she’s trying her best to not shat her pants.

When the cart stopped, Regulus turned to see how tightly she’s been holding his hand. He smiled at the sight but bit it down and turned the other way before she could see it. She was still panting from the adrenaline but a bright smile was evident on her face. She too seemed to be enjoying the ride.

“Shall we go for another round?”

“I’d love to, but I’m not a big fan of the queueing line.” She says, peeking out “It seems to be longer than before.”

“Well, that’s why we’ve got wands, isn’t it?” Regulus says as he takes out his wand from his coat pocket.

“Regulus, what are you doing?”

Before he could utter the spell, she hurriedly pushed his wand away, widening her eyes in disapproval as Regulus kept his nonchalant self, “What?”

“You can’t use magic in the presence of muggles.” She scolds “What on Earth were you thinking?”

“You said you didn’t want to queue. We could just do a little confundus charm and they wouldn’t know a thing.”

Her jaw dropped, completely horrified at his mischief.

“Just relax.”

“No,” She said before he could take out his wand again “You’re not going to use your magic here.”

He raised an eyebrow, “Why not?”

“Will you two get off? We have a long queue.”

Regulus' glare was certainly terrifying that it made the operator step back, looking intimidated. The boy didn’t look much older than them which made her feel even more sympathetic that she pulled Regulus' arm, dragging him out of the cart with angry steps.

He followed her, a small smile was still tugged on his lips as he watched her. She was evidently seething, for whatever reason he couldn’t understand. He only wanted to make her happy. She said she wanted to go for another round and didn’t want to queue, so what exactly is the issue with doing a little confundus charm? It’s not like anyone would know.

“Alright, ground rule for the rest of the night.” She says as they stopped, turning to face him “No magic. No matter how simple the spell is, or how insignificant it is in your eyes, no magic is allowed.”

“Why?”

She widens her eyes, appalled, “You know why!”

Regulus couldn’t contain his laughter now. Her reaction warms his heart. He finds it adorable how she’s so worked up over little mischief he’s sure no one would bat an eye for. It fascinates him how for once he’s finally the troublemaker instead of the voice of reason. Being in a trio with Rosier and Crouch, Regulus has always been the moral police instead of the third rascal.

“Fine,” He says, messing her hair “No magic for the rest of the night.”

She was stupefied then. His beautiful smile, the tender noise and his gentle gesture, it feels like the Regulus she’s always dreamed of is finally hers. Her cheeks were turning rosy, flustered by the enchanting side he’s showing at the moment.

“Don’t do that,” She says, slapping his hand away from her head “No messing my hair either.”

“You’re blushing.” He remarks with a satisfied smile.

“I most certainly am not.” She argues “It’s from the cold air.”

“Oh, so you admit you’re cold now?”

She glares, not saying a word.

“I’m still not giving you my coat.” He says.

“I did not say I was cold nor was I asking for it.” She spat with evident vexation “Has anyone ever told you just how much of a pain you are, Regulus?”

He shrugs, “Only on my good days.”

She rolled her eyes, taking steps away from him.

Regulus was toying with her, she knew it, and as much as she tries not to give the reaction he’s craving for, she couldn’t help but to give it. He was always right, always so perfect for her to ever be truly angry. The fact that he’s being so lovely tonight makes it impossible for her to hold a grudge longer than three seconds.

“So where to next?” He asked, matching his pace with her.

“We’ve ridden all of the rides,” She says, looking around the park “But one.”

The rogue on her cheeks turn darker as she stares at the Ferris wheel. The stories of her muggleborn friends about how romantic Ferris wheel rides are, echo in her head. She didn’t understand what was so special about the ride. They could certainly just get on their broom to go up and see the city lights but muggles seem to romanticise the ride a lot and she couldn’t help but to hope to feel such romantism with him.

“Alright, shall we go then?”

She turns to meet eyes with him, nodding.

Now they find themselves sitting in one of the cabins. She couldn’t find it in her to see his face because she knew she would be blushing hard once again. The excitement is building up, making her giddy and skittish. She could only hope that the tapping of her feet wasn’t that obvious for him to notice.

“You alright?”

She nods, not facing him, “Yes.”

“Okay.”

Regulus finds it odd how she’s suddenly looking away, not sparing a second to see him ever since they headed to this ride. Was she still angry about him taking out his wand? Was it about him messing her hair? Or was it about something else?

“It’s nice up here,” He comments, trying to break the ice.

She hums.

“Reckon we can see your house from up here?”

“Maybe.”

Regulus frowns. Her sudden coldness was something he didn’t expect to see. Everything was brilliant just a minute ago. He enjoyed their time, feeling as if it was a proper first date for them to have, and he thought that she felt it too. Now he wasn’t so sure.

His finger taps on the metal cart, biting his lower lip as he thinks of the moment things went downhill. She still had that smile when they began walking. It only disappeared when she pointed at this ride, a ride that doesn’t look half as interesting as the others. Compared to the rollercoaster, Regulus would argue that this ride is dull and dreary. Is that really the cause of her sudden change of demeanour? That she didn’t really want to go up this ride?

“Can I ask you something?” She asks, suddenly facing him.

Regulus nods.

“Do you have any muggleborn friends, Regulus?”

He frowns, shaking his head, “No, not really.”

“Right,” She nods, muttering to herself “That makes sense.”

“What makes sense?”

“Nothing,” She lies “I just remembered that I’ve only ever seen you with Rosier and Crouch.”

Regulus clenches his jaw. Is that it? Is that why she’s suddenly distant now? That she’s thinking of Rosier? 

And he thought she was having fun with him. Apparently not.

“Is there something you wanted to know about?” He asked, digging his grave deeper “Do you want to know about my friends?”

“If you want to talk about them, I’m listening.”

Regulus bites the inner of his cheek. It hurts to know that she wanted to know about his friends better, that she was even thinking about them, when they’re literally on a date. Well, she didn’t say it was one but it should certainly be called as. What else would you call this? This certainly goes beyond what a friendly hang out is.

At least in his dictionary.

“You gave a rule earlier, so can I give one too?”

She nods, her brows furrowing a little at his question.

“Can we not talk about anything else but ourselves for the rest of the night?” He asked “I know I owe you a lot but I really hope we could finish the night with just the two of us.”

Her expression changed. There was a hint of tenderness Regulus couldn’t really put a word on. As if she was touched over his words. Like she didn’t expect him to want to spend the rest of the night with just the two of them.

She smiles, nodding, “Alright.”

They turned silent once more. But the air is certainly different now. Tension and awkwardness no longer linger around them, only comfort and mutual understanding that they both wanted to bask in this moment while it lasts. It fills both of their hearts to know that they’re enjoying their time spent together. If only they would say it aloud, they would’ve amplified their happiness by tenfold.

But after a couple minutes of silence, as their cabin got to the peak, the wheel suddenly stopped. The sudden halt was making her panic, squealing in fear as Regulus put his arm protectively around her. The engine stopped.

“Looks like we’re stuck here,” Regulus said, looking down to see people trying to work the machine “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” She said, still clinging on his arm “How long do you think we’ll be stuck here?”

Regulus shrugs, “How should I know? I’ve never been to these kinds of parks before.”

She frowns but remains quiet.

Regulus closed his eyes, feeling the light breeze of the wind as he relaxed his feet. It was refreshing up here. Quiet, calming, serene. It reminds him of his night flies around the castle whenever he needed to get some peace of mind and tranquillity. Perhaps he could go and find more of these rides some time.

One of the things he loved most about this moment is how she’s still holding his arm tightly. He smiles at the thought, how much more comfortable they are with each other over this date. Perhaps he should’ve done this years ago.

“This is nice.” He comments, still with his eyes closed.

Silence.

Regulus opened his eyes, turning to see her who has her head now resting on his shoulder, “Hey, you alright?”

“Do you think it’s still gonna be long until the engine comes back on?”

“I don’t know,” He says truthfully, pulling away to see her better “Are you okay? Should we just disapparate?”

“No,” She says fast, finally looking up to him “No magic, remember?”

“Well you don’t seem to be enjoying this ride.” He points out “Surely we can make an exception.”

“It’s not the ride that’s the problem,” She says, her teeth chattering a little “I’m cold.”

Regulus bites his smile. He wanted to rub it on her face, how he’s right from the beginning and she was just too stubborn to admit it, but the tormented look on her face made him think twice. She seemed to be really bothered by the coldness that to be fair, was nothing for Regulus, but still, he wouldn’t give his coat.

Instead, Regulus unbuttoned his coat and took off one side of it, gesturing to her to come closer.

“We both can’t fit inside, Regulus.” She notes.

“Well, I told you I’m not giving you my coat, so either we squeeze in or you freeze yourself to death.” He says with a nonchalant shrug “Your choice.”

She looks at him with disbelief. As if she couldn’t believe that the man sitting in front of him, acting cheeky and playful, was Regulus Black. Everything about him today just doesn’t make sense. From the moment he volunteered to come to the theme park, to asking her to snuggle close to him to share his coat now. Whatever happened to the apathetic Regulus Arcturus Black?

But she knew better than to complain about it. She enjoys every passing moment of the day. Every bicker, every annoyed remark, every feigned anger. She wouldn’t wish for any other way to spend the day.

And so she snuggled closer to him, encircling her arms around his body like a koala to a tree. His body warmth was comforting, along with the smell of his perfume. Regulus put the other part of his coat around her, trying to cover her as best as he could.

“Is this okay?” He asks. She could hear his heartbeat from the close proximity.

“Yeah,” She whispers, not looking up cause she knew her cheeks must be as red as tomatoes “Is this okay for you?”

Regulus hums, resting his chin to the top of her head.

“This is nice,” She says “I might actually fall asleep on you.”

He smiles, “Just don’t drool on my shirt.”

“No promises.”

—-

Regulus couldn’t recall the last time he woke up with such a light heart. The memory from last night still intoxicates him. How they spent hours waiting for the wheel to finally turn, to get them to the ground, yet neither of them were complaining. Matter of fact, he hoped that it would’ve lasted longer. He wouldn’t mind spending forever stuck in that cabin with her.

When he came down to the dinning hall though, a frown bloomed on his face. She was absent. Her plate was empty, cup cleaned as if she hadn't even used it. Only Sirius was present with a stack of toasts on his plate.

“Where is she?” Regulus asked.

“Resting,” His brother said “Where the hell did you go last night? Why did you come back so late?”

Regulus sniffled, taking a seat and fixing himself a cup of tea, “We just hung out, went to the park in the city.”

“Why did you come back so late then? There’s not much of a ride there.”

“We got stuck on the Ferris wheel for hours.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, “Why didn’t you just disapparate?”

“She wouldn’t let us use magic. I don’t know, ask her.” He said, defensive “Why is she still resting? Isn’t it late already for her?”

“She’s sick, that’s why.”

“Sick? What do you mean she’s sick?” Regulu asked, feeling guilt to seep in “She was just fine last night.”

“She caught a cold. Fever and all,” Sirius said as he put a toast in his mouth, standing to leave for his room “Next time you go out with her, tell her to bring a coat, will you?”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “You think I didn’t tell her that?”

Regulus’ words were met by silence as Sirius entered his room. He begins to wonder if his banter of not giving her his coat was wrong, if their play stubborn was too far that it made her fall ill. It might just be one of those light colds, sure, but Regulus has never made anyone sick nor has he ever taken care of anyone unwell.

Should he even be taking care of her? Supposedly, yeah, seeing that he is her husband and the kind gesture she did the other week when she brought him his breakfast, but such action is strange for him. Where does he even start? How does he even do it?

—-

It was noon now and Regulus sprinted out of his room the moment he heard some noises in the kitchen. He saw Sirius left for whatever business he has so the only cause of such commotion would be her. He skipped down the stairs, feeling relieved to see her that is now enveloped under layers of blankets.

“You look awful,” He comments.

“Wow, thank you,” She retorts, sniffling “What a pleasant compliment, Regulus.”

Regulus bites down a smile, taking a seat opposite her, “Have you taken any meds?”

“Yeah, not much of a help so far, though.”

“Well, at least now you’ll remember to bring a coat whenever you go out.”

She glares at him, “You’re a prick, Regulus, do you know that?”

Regulus grins.

He watches as she fixes herself a cup of tea. One and a half teaspoon of sugar, no milk. He finds himself noting the small details of hers he didn’t know before. Like how she leans more on sweet kinds of breakfast instead of savoury ones, or how her brows are more often pinched than not whenever she’s thinking, or how the scent of rose from her was not from her perfume but her hand cream— her perfume was patchouli based.

“Do you not have any plans today?”

“No,” Regulus shakes his head “I prefer to stay in and read. I don’t normally go out.”

She hums in acknowledgement.

“Did you have plans for today?” He asked in return.

“Not really,”

Regulus nods, turning silent.

The only noise between them now was her sniffling. She taps on her cup, looking as if she has something she wanted to say but is still debating to utter it. Another thing Regulus takes note of— she fidgets quite a lot.

“Will you read for me?”

“No.” Regulus answers firmly.

“Oh come on, that’s the least you could do!” She whines “You got me sick!”

“You got sick because you’re too stubborn to listen to me.”

She huffs, “I wouldn’t be sick if you had given me your coat.”

“But then I’d get sick if I did.”

“Yes, but I’ll make you soup and read you a book, so you owe it to me.”

“You will not make me soup,” Regulus snorts, mocking “I doubt you even know how to turn on the cooker.”

Her mouth agape, offended, “That is beside the point, alright!”

“You don’t look sick enough for me to owe you a reading,” Regulus remarks, standing up from his seat “Feel better soon though. You look ghastly.”

“You—,” She said, throwing him a ball of tissue “And whose fault is that?!”

“Yours.”

“Regulus!”

Regulus chuckles, turning and heading back to his room. At least her anger is still intact. He could lose the bigger weight of guilt he’s feeling over her cold from the knowledge. Another thing to note, bring her coat for her the next time they go out.

↠ Part V

[azsazz]

omg BABE congraaats! SO excited for u 👏 I absolutely adored Midnight Muse, so even though a small part of me wants to hoard and gatekeep our precious fic in this fandom, you deserve the success and recognition, and the world deserves good books! 💖

Remember us and remember where u came from when you blow up 🥹 luv uuuuu

now, some questions 4 u:

How was it to 'un-acotar-ize' the story, and find alternate names for everyone? Do you still picture the acotar characters in your mind in the new version? I'm curious what the rest of the changed names are apart from Quinn and Knox (which are awesome names btw), are the other changed names something you can share, or is that a secret? (it's fine if not, I'm just super curious 😁) Also, was 'Knox' a reference to one of Az's sons in your fic family tree?

Also, I notice it says "Book 1 of the Vulcan University series", are there plans for more? 👀

💙

Thank you so much!!! I know i wish we could gatekeep it here too but it was too good not to share with the world! The real ones will always know where midnight muse came from 💙💙

i could never forget any of you!! and you'll never get rid of me either 😈 hehehe. I love you too!! 🫶🏻

Honestly, it de-acotarizing it wasn't too bad. it was a little grating because i basically had to revise 120k 😭 and my version of revising that was literally retyping the entire thing because im a psycho and can't just fix up paragraphs haha. but the plot did get some work after all of the feedback i received and i thinks its even better than it was!! There's def still some subtle acotar hints tbh (maybe to the point where i'm worried it might be a lil obvious but whatevs) but gotta let em know my roots lol

hmmm finding names was kind of a mix of easy and hard for me. i've always wanted to use the name knox because i really like it as we all know so i went with him bcs i love it. it's slightly a reference to the son i made for him, but if you've read the knox x reader fic there's something that i do want to use his (my?) canon (or is it fanon? no idea) character with a variation of the name (so excited about). but that's for when i attempt writing a fantasy so idk when that will happen, there's much more thought that has to go into that than my lil romance 💙 but yeah we love knoxie in any form 💙

sometimes i do picture the characters when im writing...it's surprisingly mostly cass i think about or slip up when i'm talking about it irl 😂 but they mostly have their own personalities now and i adore them all so much!

I would LOVE to share the other character names!! So we have Quinn (absolutely love this name tbh) and Knox obviously 💙💙💙 Then we have Ace (which would be Rhysand's character in the fanfic), Rory - Quinn's best friend and roommate. Then we have Slate (😂 always cracks me up) for Cassian's character, and Reid for Luciens character. Mandy was Mor but only makes a brief appearance! Those are pretty much the main characters for the series 💙

There are plans for more...hehehe...i might be well into writing the second one as we speak, but the goal is to have four books in this series!

thank you for the questions these were so exciting and fun to talk about 🥰💙

[wooahaes]

cause you’re my flower

pairing: non-idol!seungkwan x gn!reader, ft roommate!dk

word count: 9.3k~

warnings: angst, no happy ending. usage of the hanahaki disease trope + mentions of surgery (& hospitals). heartbreak, depictions of illness (via hanahaki), reader struggles with breathing some. vernon says ‘dude’ but its unclear whether its aimed at reader or toward chan (it can be easily read either way). minimal proofreading, my bad.

daisy’s notes: ok google play flower + fallin’ flower by svt. in my heart theres a sequel of reader n joshua + jeonghan (or just reader and seokmin tbh, both could work) slowly falling in love lol but i doubt anyone wants that fic

It all started with a tickle in the back of your throat in early winter.

In your defense, you’d just thought you were coming down with something. From the corner of a cozy cafe, you waited for Seungkwan with a burning hot cup of tea in a to-go cup between your hands. Maybe you’d make another cup when you went home--black tea, maybe, with honey for your health. Seokmin would probably give you a soup recipe if you asked and help you make it, too (the perks of having a lovely roommate). But that could wait, as you saw Seungkwan walk into the cafe. He spotted you, smiling and waving before he went to order his Americano. He’d asked you to meet him here, and yet you’d arrived before he did. You’d tease him about it later: you always seemed to be the one who showed up to places before he did (out of habit for getting places early, to be fair).

Soon enough, Seungkwan had sat across from you, making small talk while he opened the plastic. You’d been talking about work when you noticed the way he fumbled the straw, the plastic hitting the table.

Was he nervous...?

“Everything okay?” You tilted your head, as if it’d give you a better look at him. His eyes flickered up to meet your own, and you smiled. “You can tell me anything, you know.”

Seungkwan let out a sigh a moment later, annoyed that his nerves had triumphed over his attempt to act casual. “I went out on a date.”

For a second, your smile faltered. “Oh?”

“And it went well,” he said, pushing his straw into his drink. The ice clinked as he picked it up, taking a long sip before setting it back down. “She wants to go out again, but...”

“But?”

He met your gaze again. “I have no idea what I’m doing.”

In another life, you’d probably laugh at him. Tease him over being clueless before asking what they’d agreed on. But that damn tickle in the back of your throat made you cough, smile falling as you reached for your drink. Seungkwan, kind as he always was, had immediately moved to push it into your hands. He waited, watching you take a long sip of your tea until your throat felt soothed.

“Are you sick?” He frowned, brows drawing tightly together. “I should have asked before asking you to meet me--”

You waved him off. “I’m fine, Kwannie,” you forced your voice to stay lighter, as if nothing was wrong. “Don’t worry about me.”

Yet he pouted, “Have you been taking your vitamins? It’s cold out. If you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll get sick...”  

Again, you dismissed the thought. “I’m fine,” you pushed further. “So... Do you like her?”

His face flushed at the question as he averted his gaze, taking another long sip through his straw instead of answering your question. “She’s... really kind,” he settled on a moment later. “I think she really likes me.”

Who wouldn’t like you? You cast that thought aside. “That’s good,” you kept your tone even. “So... You’re telling me all of this because...?”

“I want to buy her flowers,” he said. “And I want someone to go with me, and Vernon can’t--not that I’d ask him. You know flowers. So...”

Despite that same damn feeling in your throat picking back up, you swallowed hard and nodded. “Of course I’ll go with you,” you said. “You didn’t have to ask me out to coffee to ask that.”

Seungkwan’s face flushed once more. “I...” He knew you had a point. “I just wanted to see you. Is that so wrong?” When you began to cough again, Seungkwan frowned, “I’ll get you some napkins. You should go home and rest,” he stood up. “Seriously...” He huffed, “We’re friends. You should have told me you weren’t feeling well.”

Truthfully, you didn’t know you were coming down with something. You’d been fine up until he asked you to come meet him, and even then it had only been that tiny tickle in the back of your throat. With napkins pushed into your hands, you bid Seungkwan farewell before leaving--but not without him saying he’d text Seokmin and demand that he take care of you. He was your close friend, that’s what friends were for (and Seungkwan could probably recount the times he’d helped Vernon and Chan when they were feeling awful, albeit from a distance with a mask on and a bag of medicine held as far from himself as possible to minimize the risk of getting sick himself). You’d promised him that you’d let him know when you were home safe and sound, because Seungkwan was a worrier when the people he cared about were struggling, and that had been enough for him to finally let you go.

When you came home, Seokmin had been looking through the fridge. “Seungkwan said you’re sick,” he called out without looking up. “I think I have a recipe--”

“Oh my god, it’s not that serious,” you said, slipping into your house slippers. “I might be getting a cold. I’ll make some tea and rest--it won’t be a big deal.”

Seokmin looked up. “Are you sure? I’ll make us soup tonight,” he turned his attention back to the fridge. “I might run to the store--”

You immediately began to sputter and cough again, something in your throat moving upward with each hack. Seokmin immediately rushed over to you, wide-eyed as he hit you between the shoulder blades as you leaned over the sink. Gasping for air, you continued to choke until something finally fell from your mouth: a wet glob of petals, bright yellow standing out against the stainless steel. You stood there, heaving as Seokmin wordlessly rubbed circles into your back as you caught your breath.

Fuck.

Hanahaki Disease. Of all the things your family was saddled with, this was the absolute fucking worst. While not purely related to genetics, there were the rare families that were more prone to the stupid disease. You’d never win the lottery, but you’d win this shit. Your mother had it once when she was a teenager, and so did her father, and her father’s grandmother because not every bitch in your family has been saddled with this shit. You’d hoped that you’d lucked out.

Considering you were sitting on an examination table and the plastic bag of those stupid yellow carnation petals you’d coughed up, clearly you had not. Seokmin had brought you to the doctor, insisting that you have someone out in the waiting room. And since you knew exactly who these feelings were linked to, you refused to bring Seungkwan or Vernon or Chan into this: two of them would spill shit because this was too big to keep secret.

“Surgery is an option,” the doctor said to you. In your pissed state, you almost wanted to snap back that you knew that because of your family history. But she hadn’t done anything to you, and you bit back any bitter comments as she continued to talk about how the procedure was entirely safe.

Your parents, luckily, had already agreed to pay for the procedure before you even brought it up. You’d called them after spitting up the flower, and your mother had said they’d pay for it to save your life. What you hadn’t told them was that you weren’t entirely sure about the procedure at the moment. You’d heard the horror stories both from family and people outside of it. Your mother had woken up and gone back to school a few days later, and she felt... nothing when she saw her former crush. He used to be her friend, and the surgery had been what led to their friendship ending. Your grandpa told you that he hadn’t regret itted in the slightest: the young man he’d been smitten for had moved on, he never saw him again, and he recovered well. 

But you? Seungkwan was your friend. One of your close friends. How were you supposed to face him after surgery and feel nothing? At the worst, you might not even remember him since the recovery period differed for plenty of people. Your grandpa had told you that: his grandpa had told him when he was a boy that he forgot her face entirely, and that it was for the best. Better to live without remembering them than die gasping for another breath and choking up flowers. How were you supposed to tell Seungkwan that you couldn’t get close to him again? That this would be it between the two of you because if you stayed around him too much, you held the risk of it coming back?

You couldn’t. The idea of hurting Seungkwan was... hard to swallow. Or maybe that was also the petals you started coughing up again, your doctor quickly pushing a paper towel into your hands.

“Luckily we have medication that’ll help slow the process,” she told you, already jotting something down. “A surgeon will get in touch with you to help you figure out what comes next, alright? I’ll give you a call in a day once we get those x-rays back.”

You mumbled some sort of thanks before gathering your things. Seokmin rose once you re-entered the waiting room post-payment for your visit, and made his way over to you.

“I’m fine,” you said, continuing past him. “Gotta stop by the pharmacy.”

Seokmin’s gaze softened. “Well? What did she say?”

You waited until the two of you were outside. “I guess I’m getting surgery.”

“You guess?! You have to get it,” Seokmin said, “you’ll die if you don’t! You aren’t considering not--”

“I don’t know!” You hugged yourself tight. “I just--I don’t know. How am I supposed to tell Seungkwan I can’t see him anymore?”

Seokmin slowed to a stop, staring at you. “It’s Seungkwan?”

... Fuck, you weren’t supposed to say that. No one was supposed to know. But if you had to pick a person, Seokmin was trustworthy. He wouldn’t tell. Not until later, at least. And if you went through the procedure, you’d at least have someone who could keep him away, if not break the news for you...

Seokmin said your name, pity in his eyes. “You should tell him.”

“I can’t.”

Seokmin reached for your hands, gently curling his fingers around them. “You should,” he pushed further. “I’ll be there with you if you want me to be. But you should tell him. What are you going to do if you don’t? Just stop seeing him?”

Honestly, it didn’t seem like such a bad plan. A dick move, definitely, but cutting him out entirely and letting the news get to him secondhand? He’d never want to see you again after that heartbreak. It’d do the job.

“Don’t,” Seokmin said, knowing the look on your face. “We need to go to the pharmacy, right?”

You nodded, pulling your hands free from his. You started forward, only to feel the telltale feeling in your throat of flower petals again. With a tissue pushed into your hand from Seokmin, you coughed up a few petals before curling your fingers around them tight, hands shaking. Seokmin came back to your side, leaning forward to see that tears were brimming around your eyes.

Your name fell from his lips, and before you knew it, Seokmin had enveloped you in his warm embrace. “It’s okay,” he promised. “I’ll help you. You’re not in this alone.”

At least you had Seokmin. In the end, he’d be all you’d have, and you knew it. But you could manage with just Seokmin for right now.

“Seokmin said you went to the doctor.”

Seungkwan stood a little further from you, happily looking over the different flowers on display. True to your word, you’d come with him after promising that you were fine. The medication was working at temporarily slowing down the disease’s progression (thank you, modern medicine--you only choked up flowers every once in a while now), and you hadn’t felt anything. Maybe a little numbness in your chest, but nothing major. That was a normal side effect, apparently, to help with the whole flowers-growing-in-your-lungs thing. You side-eyed the stupid bouquet of yellow carnations, though.

Seungkwan called your name, and your attention snapped back to him. He’d come over, looking down at the flowers. “These are pretty.”

“You don’t want them,” you pushed past him. “If you’re going to pick carnations, you should pick the red ones. Or the pink ones, if you want.”

He’d stayed right where he was. “I don’t know,” he said. “These are pretty.”

“There’s better yellow flowers,” you said. “If she knows anything about flower language, you’d be telling her a big ole “nope, not interested.””

Seungkwan immediately turned away. “This is why I have you here,” he made his way back to you, already latching himself back onto your arm. “You’re the expert... What do you think? I want to give her something bright and pretty.”

You were far from an expert. You just... looked up flower meanings sometimes. Maybe it came from a morbid curiosity when your mother told you, after your badgering, what flowers she had (purple hyacinth--sorrow, a beg for forgiveness). You had looked up your own: of course loving Seungkwan would give you something pretty and bright like him. At least they were better than the red spider lilies (death) that your grandfather had coughed up.

“Are roses off the table?”

“Aren’t they too serious?” Seungkwan frowned at you. “This is our second date... I don’t want it to look like I’m moving too fast.”

“Then go for tulips,” you said, guiding him over to where a bouquet stood of pink tulips. “The pink ones would work.”

“Are you sure?”

If you didn’t know that Seungkwan was anxious, you would have rolled your eyes. He... really seemed to like this girl. There were legends that said if you could convince him to love you back, the flowers would go away on their own. But if doing that tore him away from someone else he already liked...

“Of course I’m sure,” you smiled at him. “She’ll love them.”

Seungkwan had smiled at you, squeezing your arm. “This is why you’re my best friend,” he said. “Besides Vernon.”

The disclaimer there made you smile. If he didn’t specify, you would have texted Vernon immediately. You turned your attention away from him for a moment, gaze caught on a bouquet of white lilies kept in a case. Seungkwan followed your gaze, his grasp on you easing up. He quietly excused himself to go speak to the florist, and you made up something about needing fresh air.

Standing outside the shop, you watched people trudge past. The paint on the bench was beginning to flake off, pieces of dark green and pale white petals coming off onto your fingers. You dragged your hand along the leg of your jeans, and pulled out your phone. You’d need to take your medicine in another few hours, before you went to bed. Once in the morning, once at night: the nightly dose kept you from waking up with petals in your throat (as well as knocked you out pretty well). It worked. It wouldn’t work forever, not when the disease became worse, but at least you had a little more time before you needed surgery. It gave you time to think about what really mattered now.

“Is something wrong?” Seungkwan had exited the store, bell still jingling as the door shut behind him. He held the bouquet in his arms securely, yet gentle enough to keep from crushing a single flower.

Tell him. You could practically hear Seokmin urging you to do so. “Seungkwan...” You felt your hope dwindle in your chest. Guilt. Don’t ruin this. Leave him with good memories of you. “What would you do if something happened to us?” 

He frowned, settling into the spot next to you. “Did the doctor say something?”

“No! No, just...” You frowned. “Theoretically... if we couldn’t be friends anymore... Would you move on?”

Seungkwan watched you with careful eyes, mouth slightly agape as he struggled to answer the question. How would you answer that kind of thing? “You’re scaring me,” he said a moment later. “If something’s wrong--”

“Nothing’s wrong,” you insisted. “It’s just--I dunno, I watched a stupid movie the other day,” you lied, hoping he would buy it. “And I just kept wondering about what would happen if we couldn’t be friends anymore. It’s stupid.”

He let out a sigh of relief, back falling against the bench before he immediately smacked your arm. “You scared me! I thought you were dying!” He huffed, “You shouldn’t talk so seriously about a movie. Seriously...”

“You didn’t answer the question,” you pouted at him. “Would you move on?”

“No,” he said, “because you’re stuck with me forever.”

You rolled your eyes, fighting back a smile. “Uh-huh.”

“You love me,” he laughed, one of his arms slipping through your own. His cheek pressed against your shoulder. “Right?”

... Right.

Seokmin sat behind the wheel, fingers drumming against it as he slightly bobbed his head to the music. He still hadn’t told you where the two of you were going--only that you had to go with him because this was important. Important enough that he was driving to a different part of the city, listening carefully to each instruction from his phone’s map service. He told you that he’d explain when you got there (which was what he told you after he told you he’d explain in the car). Despite your slight demand that he take you out to dinner at a casual place in the area that Mingyu had been raving about, you trusted Seokmin enough to blindly follow him like this.

He pulled the car into a spot, quickly shooting a text to someone before he turned his attention to scrounging up the change to pay for parking. “Okay,” he said. “You said the surgeon called for an exam before setting the date.”

“Uh-huh?”

“And you told me that you were still on the fence about it.”

Stupidly, you had. Although, when you thought about it, it was good that you told someone. Your parents were completely set on it without giving you space to decide: Seokmin at least listened to you.

“I’m going to help you make up your mind,” he said. He pointed up to a higher apartment on the building. “My friends live there. I’ll introduce you when we get there.”

Once he’d paid the meter, Seokmin took your arm and guided you into the building. Soon enough, the two of you were standing in an elevator. You ignored the worried look Seokmin gave you when you coughed up petals into another tissue (this time your own--you’d stolen one of those pocket packs from Seokmin so he wouldn’t have to dote on you so heavily). The elevator whisked the two of you higher and higher before chiming, and Seokmin gestured for you to follow as he looked back at his phone. Wordlessly, you followed him down the hallway until he finally arrived at a door.

Before he could even knock, the door opened. A pretty man stood in the doorway, hair pulled back into the tiniest of ponytails as he warmly greeted Seokmin. Then his gaze met your own, and that warm smile fell a little.

“Is this them?”

Seokmin nodded. He said your name, before turning back to his friend, “this is Jeonghan. We were in a choir together in college.”

Jeonghan stepped out of the way. “I’ll let him know you’re here,” he said. “Just a warning that he doesn’t really remember too much, so... Please don’t stress him out too much.”

The two of you stood in the entryway as Jeonghan left, calling out for someone named Joshua. With a curious glance to Seokmin, you began to pull off your coat to leave behind as Jeonghan returned with another man--equally handsome in looks, with the gentlest eyes you thought you’d ever seen on a person.

“Hi,” he said, voice warm already, “so, uh... You’re the one with Hanahaki?” When you mustered up a nod, he extended a hand to you. “I’m Joshua.”

You introduced yourself in turn, giving Seokmin another weird look. “And... I’m here because...?”

“Hanahaki nearly killed me,” Joshua told you outright. “And Seokmin said you’re considering not getting the surgery. I’m supposed to tell you why it’s a really bad idea before you make up your mind.”

You immediately glared at Seokmin. “I thought you said you wouldn’t force me to change my mind--”

“And he’s not,” Joshua said, gently guiding you forward. “I wasn’t going to get them removed either. But things were... really, really bad. So I just want to tell you what you’re signing yourself up for.”

Jeonghan made a comment about making the two of you some tea, and you followed Joshua out onto the balcony for some privacy. He brushed a hand through his hair, settling into a cozy chair. There was an easel set up in the corner, empty of a canvas but stained with paint. Joshua followed your gaze to it.

“Do you paint?” He asked, and when you shook your head, he smiled. “I don’t, either. It’s Jeonghan’s.”

“And you two are...?”

“Friends,” he clarified easily. “Really close friends. Look... Seokmin told me a little about you. You’re in love with your friend, right?”

It felt weird for a stranger to say it out loud. But you settled into your chair, nodding. “Yeah. His name is Seungkwan,” you said quietly, “and I didn’t mean to fall for him, but I did, and now...”

The conversation died as Jeonghan stepped out, setting two mugs between the two of you. You thanked him, and waited until the balcony door slid shut again before reaching for your own mug.

“And now you’re coughing up petals,” Joshua said, taking his own mug. “I get it. I didn’t think it’d happen to me, either.”

“What happened?”

Joshua opened his mouth to speak, only to wince for a moment. “Shit--” He lifted a hand to his temple, rubbing at it before setting down the mug. You watched the way he went quiet, eyes squeezing shut. “I--I don’t know,” he said. “Jeonghan told me that there was a girl. I fell in love with her, she rejected me, and then I started coughing up flowers.”

You raised a brow. “He told you?”

The pain began to subside, and Joshua opened his eyes again after a moment before nodding. “He told you, right? I don’t remember all of it. Her name, her face... her favorite color.” He stared off for a moment. “Nothing. I’m apparently a rare case, but the doctors said it’s because I let it progress too far.”

“You didn’t see anyone?”

He shook his head. “I told Jeonghan I wasn’t going to. He’ll say I was being dramatic, and maybe I was, but... I didn’t want to lose her. I loved her,” his gaze didn’t meet yours again. “It wasn’t her fault she didn’t love me. Not all cases are fatal, I mean. Jeonghan says I had this stupid hope she’d change her mind because the guy she liked was a dick. My mom kept telling me that I needed to see someone. I think...”

He took a deep breath. And then he slowly exhaled, curling back up in his chair. The thick sweater he wore fell down over his hands, and those pretty pale brown curls were rustled by the cold breeze. But neither of you moved to go back inside.

“I think I was punishing myself. I don’t remember why, or how I came to that conclusion, but it makes sense. I was the one who fell in love with her when it wasn’t going to happen. I was the one who deserved to suffer for it.”

Something about the somber way he spoke shook you. Like he had resigned himself to death there, the heartbreak of a love so powerful not being returned had broken him. Maybe that was why you still weren’t sure about the surgery. It’d be admitting you were stupid enough to fall for someone who never liked you. 

“So it got worse,” Joshua continued after a moment, lidded eyes staring down into his tea. “And worse. And then Jeonghan came home one day, and found me collapsed and gasping for air. He called the paramedics, they managed to clear my airway of the blood and flowers, and I was taken in for an emergency procedure to remove the flowers. If he hadn’t come home, I would have died...”

He didn’t need to say more. You understood the feeling well. If Seokmin hadn’t pushed you to see someone, you’d probably be in the same boat. A morbid part of you had to wonder if you’d be the same way: lying on the kitchen floor, cold tiles under your fingers as you gasped for one last breath of air.

“I’m a rare case,” he said, eyes meeting your own again. “Most people who get the procedure done before it progresses too much still retain all their memories. And I know there’s research still being done on whether Hanahaki always returns if you stay around the person, since a lot of people are reluctant to break ties when they’ve fallen in love with their friend. But if I could go back in time... I don’t think I would hesitate.”

“Have you met other people?” The question pushed out of you before you could process it.

He smiled at you warmly. “I’ve met you.” But then he laughed softly, “A few. No one I’ve liked yet, but I have hope. I started seeing a therapist once I was released from the hospital, and she’s helped me with everything. They say it’s really rare for Hanahaki to take hold twice in the same person--something about the antibodies created, I’m not sure.” He set his mug down. “But... I think Seokmin’s worried you’re trying to punish yourself, too. Just because you fell in love with your friend.”

You said nothing, arms curling back around yourself to hug yourself tight.

“It’s not a crime to fall in love with someone,” Joshua said slowly and clearly. “Just like how it’s not a crime he doesn’t love you back. I know you don’t want to cut him out of your life, but you need to do what’s best for you. You’ll love someone else one day. But if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t live to experience it.”

Not all cases are fatal, you wanted to point out to him again. It goes away in rare cases.

Rare. Just like the disease itself.

He began to reach into his pockets, pulling out his wallet. “The therapist I see is a grief counselor, but she apparently did some major studies in helping people like us recover after the surgery. If you tell me your room number, I’ll send you a bear.” He slid the card across the table to you. “I figured you’d be tired of flowers.”

The thought made you smile. Without a word, you accept the card, pushing it into your own wallet to consider later. “I didn’t say I’d go through with it.”

“I know. Send me your room number. I’ll give you my number when we’re back inside,” he pushed back his chair. “It’s freezing out here.”

You scooted your own chair back, about to stand when Joshua turned back to you.

“When you tell him,” Joshua said, “make sure you tell him that you still treasure him. Okay?”

You stared at him a moment, brows drawing together.

“Jeonghan didn’t get to do the same before his own procedure,” he said quieter. “She was his friend, too."

(It wasn’t until then that you noticed the top few buttons of Jeonghan’s shirt were open, and you could see the faint incision scar up the center of his chest.)

Seungkwan had invited you over to a movie night--just the two of you. With your medicine kicking in, you’d agreed. Saturday night movie nights were a longstanding tradition, sometimes including Vernon if he wasn’t busy (and occasionally Chan, ever since you unbanned him from them (he had bad taste in college)). But tonight would just be the two of you, and you’d had a long day at work, so something about curling up with Seungkwan and watching something stupid seemed more appealing. At least the petals weren’t a huge deal. You could hide them if need be, but they hadn’t been acting up too badly yet. Maybe you coughed them up a bit more, which wasn’t great when you had to answer phone calls at work, but people were usually understanding when you made a quick apology and went straight back into that mask of professionalism. You’d fully be off while you recovered from surgery, taking off a few personal days leading up to it as well, and hopefully be fine to return soon enough. But you kept tissues on your desk and had grown better at coughing up the petals and immediately tossing them away before anyone could see or be bothered by it. Even Seokmin rarely noticed when it was acting up again. 

And yet the universe seemed to have the absolute worst fucking timing.

“You didn’t have to say yes,” Seungkwan said from the other end of the couch as he watched you shift uncomfortably, coughing into your elbow while searching for your pack of tissues. “If you aren’t feeling well, you should be resting. I don’t know why you’re even at work right now. Your doctor should have given you the written excuse to get your boss off your back.”

“She did, I just didn’t use it. I’ll take off next week.”

Seungkwan rolled his eyes, turning his attention back to the drama on the screen--something he’d been meaning to watch. “I have extra vitamins you can take with you. Remind me and I’ll give them to you before you leave.”

The female lead had begun coughing up flowers dramatically on the screen, and you felt a sense of bitterness at the sight of it. You had seen this one already. She’d die in the end, right before the male lead could confess that he fell for her instead. It was the dramatic tragedy of someone suffering for their love. Talking to Joshua had been enough to push that thought out of your mind: you’d get the procedure done to remove your own flowers. The harder part, and maybe the part people didn’t talk about often, was the way to cut someone out. You’d read articles both for people like you and for people trying to get out of toxic situations in general.

They said that you didn’t owe anyone an explanation. To do it publicly to keep yourself safe. That this was a process you had to go through, too, and that it was okay to dwell... except for the timer you had on your own situation, but you still had a little more time. Some lists even said to block them entirely once everything was over, just to keep them away for good. Other people said to have a real talk with someone, to explain the situation to them in order to ensure your health in the future. Everyone said it was the hardest thing to do to tell someone that you loved them and that them not reciprocating meant you were struggling worse all because of stupid flowers in your lungs, but to make it clear that it wasn’t their fault (although you’d seen people bitter and angry on both sides, some claiming it was guilt-tripping, others claiming that it technically was their fault). There was a mature way to say “I love you, I know you don’t love me back, so we need to end this so that I can live” according to plenty of people. Some people said the distance helped once the conversation was over.

But every time you looked at Seungkwan, you felt an ache in your heart and a deeper one in your lungs.

“Does this ever bother you?” He said, not looking up. He picked up another piece of popcorn. “Seeing it treated like this?”

“It’s dramatic,” you shrugged. “People use illness all the time for stuff.”

“Still...” He sighed. “I can’t imagine what it feels like to be physically hurting like this. Heartbreak is hard enough. But coughing up flowers? Isn’t that worse?”

“It is,” you hummed. “That’s what my family said, at least.”

He sighed. “If this ever happens to you, I’m taking care of you until you recover. I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Kwannie.”

He looked at you, offended. “I would be a great nurse! You know that,” he huffed.

You wanted to respond and say he couldn’t keep that kind of promise to you. But instead you turned over, watching the secondary male lead in a scene with his own love interest and the actual male lead eavesdropping. “What would your girlfriend think, hm?” You settled on teasing him, if nothing else but to shove your own feelings aside. “Taking care of someone else...”

“She knows I love my friends,” he said. And then you felt him smack your leg. “She’s not my girlfriend yet!”

“Yet.”

He looked sheepish at his slip of the tongue. “It feels a little too soon,” he said, turning back away from you. “I’ve known her for a while, but...”

“If you love her, you shouldn’t hesitate.” You curled up into yourself a little. “Life is short. What if something happens? You shouldn’t wait forever to tell someone how much they mean to you.”

“I know that,” he said, casual as could be. “That’s why I tell you all how much I love you.”

You cracked a small smile, almost telling him that he only did that because he was a big softie who loved all his friends (and liked being told in return that he was loved, too). Seungkwan was always the most physically touchy of your friend circle: that was why he was either hanging off of you or Vernon most of the time, more than content to be snuggled up to your arm or hugging you from behind during casual moments. It’s something that’s made both of you be mistaken for Seungkwan’s partner, sure, but you were always able to laugh it off both before and after you developed feelings for him.

(There was one instance of the two of you playing up the dramatics when someone tried to tell you that your boyfriend was cheating on you with the other person. Vernon had mouthed for you to slap him, and you’d stormed off only to meet back up in the car with a incredibly flustered Seungkwan who swore he couldn’t take the two of you anywhere anymore.)

“Yeah,” you said, half-heartedly as realization hit you again that these moments were fleeting. Soon you wouldn’t be able to see him anymore, not for prolonged moments. You couldn’t risk the flowers coming back once they were gone. “Love you, too, Seungkwan.”

Maybe one day you’d tell him just how much before you lost the feeling entirely.

You’d set the date. You’d gone in for the visit your surgeon had requested, which was primarily for them to take a new x-ray to check the progress. In another world, you’d be looking at the flowers on that results sheet and thinking that it was a pretty art project. But the reality of the situation was that the disease had progressed, and you’d be going in on Friday to have them surgically removed. Your parents had already come into the city with a hotel room booked for the week (the downside of your apartment with Seokmin being so small: you sure as hell weren’t going to boot him from his own room despite his offer, and your parents would rather stay somewhere closer to the hospital). You’d had dinner with them yesterday night after your appointment, talking through everything with them. Although your father would never know the feelings your mother described to you, he had been supportive as he could be while she talked you through the procedure for the third time since that first phone call.

Which was why you were now, on Wednesday, waiting for Seungkwan... and Vernon and Chan. Seokmin was sitting next to you, happy to play moral support as you broke the news. You’d figured everything out: you’d tell them about the procedure, and then ask for a day with Seungkwan tomorrow in order to experience something nice before you were stuck in the hospital for your recovery period. Except for the past where you broke the news that you could never see him again, that you loved him, and that you treasured your friendship and would never hold it against him that he didn’t reciprocate. Maybe Vernon and Chan would never speak to you again, too, but that was a fallout for later you.

Except you could see Vernon and Chan walking up to the restaurant without Seungkwan, and you knew for a fact that they would have come together.

“Seungkwan couldn’t make it,” Chan had said as he took his seat. “Didn’t he text you?”

(He did: his sister was in the city for the day and he rarely got to see her, so he apologized and said he’d talk to you tomorrow. You just hadn’t heard your phone go off, or you would have left with Seokmin far earlier and figured out something else.) 

Seokmin could see the panic on your face. He said your name, hand grazing your arm as you pushed it away.

“I’m fine,” he said.

He lowered his voice, albeit it was useless considering how close the other two were, “You’re supposed to be taking it easy now. Panicking only makes it worse--”

“Makes what worse?” Chan asked, looking between the two of you. “Wait. Are you dying?”

“No--” You said, and at the worst fucking possible moment, you began to cough. “Shit.”

Seokmin reached for the napkins as you shielded yourself as best as you could, flower petals falling in a thick clump into the white napkin. The petals, while on your medication, were rare. Not gone entirely, and of course they’d pick this moment to act up.

Vernon stared at you, hand groping through the air until it hit Chan’s arm. “Dude.”

You could practically see two bulbs light up above each guy’s head. “Don’t tell Seungkwan.”

“What the fuck do you mean ‘don’t tell Seungkwan’?!” To your surprise, Vernon had raised his voice a little. He immediately lowered it after nodding in apology to the other patrons, “you have Hanahaki! You could die if--”

“My surgery’s on Friday,” you said, “so technically I won’t die.”

“That’s beside the point!” Chan stared at you. “You’re--Why didn’t you tell us sooner?! How long have you known?!”

You said nothing. Seokmin only looked at you.

“A few weeks,” you finally confessed. “But I’m fine and I’m getting them removed, so I’ll be fine. Just... I wanted to tell Seungkwan myself.” I needed to tell him I love him before I don’t remember feeling it anymore.

Vernon knew you, though. Chan might be a little oblivious at times, but Vernon had observed you and Seungkwan enough to know. He tore his eyes away from your own, and you could hear him mumble something about how this was awful timing. The thought made your chest ache.

This was awful timing? For who? For Seungkwan? Sure, you were pretty much dying right now and having to make sure you didn’t choke to death on flowers in your sleep--But, fuck, this was inconvenient timing for Seungkwan apparently. If you had it your way, you wouldn’t have ever developed feelings for him. But Seungkwan was sweet. He was your close friend. He was the one who came over and nursed you back to health a year ago when you had the flu, even if he scolded you for not taking better care of your health.

He’d probably scold you now, too. Seungkwan would have told you off for not telling him sooner, and then he would probably have let you cry in his arms because of how terrified you were underneath everything. The procedure itself was safe: the aftermath could be anything. Meeting Joshua had confirmed that for you. What if you were like him one day? Still living with your roommate, unable to remember the reason behind the scars on your sides (or down the center of your chest--you shivered to imagine what that would mean for you, and you refused to bring that topic up to Jeonghan who clearly would rather not talk about it) without pain? You’d looked it up before: the pain was a psychological thing... or, at least, that was the leading theory. Joshua was rare, people were still researching it in full, but they said it was in the same vein as people who lived through trauma only to not remember a thing because they blocked it all out. A safety measure out of your own control.

(Sometimes you wonder whether Joshua even wanted to remember.)

Hanahaki tore people apart. The fact that you were more prone to it only made you angrier at the world, at the stupid flowers stuck in your lungs. At yourself for being so foolish to fall for Boo Seungkwan when he was only ever going to be your friend.

Vernon’s gaze softened as he watched you, so quiet and acting so much smaller. Like a child, almost: uncertain of what would come next, but with only so much guidance that you could fully understand. The swelling, the stiffness, the different feelings around your incisions. But what about what really came next? The empty feeling when you saw Seungkwan again unless you pulled yourself together to tell him that he couldn’t see you again. Not for long, not without risking yourself. He’d heard the stories and was lucky enough that his own instances of unrequited love were met with plenty of chocolate and nights with his friends, watching movies and giving him a space to feel and breathe and think.

“So what do you want us to do?”

You lifted your gaze from where you’d begun staring down into your lap, meeting Vernon’s eyes. “I...”

“We’re not gonna tell him,” he promised, despite the look Chan gave him. “I mean, that’s your thing, right? It’s your thing to tell, unless you want us to tell.”

You shook your head. “I’ll meet up with him tomorrow,” you said. “And I’ll tell him everything.”

Chan looked between the two of you, realization slowly swallowing him whole. “We’ll come visit,” he said quietly. “Is that okay?”

“It’s not a huge deal,” you shrugged. “I mean. It’s surgery, but they’ll probably keep me in for a few days of observation before I can go home. Just... Don’t send me flowers.”

It’s a weak joke, but it earned a smile from Chan. With that, you decided to shove the conversation aside for a meal with your friends instead. It felt comforting to pretend that everything was okay, as much as you wished Seungkwan was there with you. It’d be nice to hold his hand under the table for a minute, just to know that he cared about you still. That, even after you walk out of his life for good, he’d still care for you in the future.

It wasn’t until you were back in the passenger side of Seokmin’s car that you called Joshua and asked if he was busy. That night, the two of you were sitting in the Hong-Yoon apartment so you could have a cozy night. As much as you wanted to go out for dinner with your parents, you needed to stay away from surgery talk (and, unfortunately for you, that was how your mother calmed herself down: going over the procedure out loud to try and reassure both of you that everything was going to be fine). Joshua had an arm draped around your shoulders, blanketing you in his warmth as the four of you were watching some drama they’d found on Netflix.

Seokmin left to use the bathroom, and Jeonghan shifted over so that he’d be resting against Joshua’s other side. A moment later, he lifted his head, eyes meeting your own. “It’s going to be okay,” he reached out, hand finding your own for a reassuring squeeze. “I recovered well. You’ll be okay.”

Wordlessly, you snuggled further into Joshua’s chest now that you didn’t have Seokmin anchoring you from the other side, still holding Jeonghan’s hand for a moment longer. You shut your eyes for a moment, just listening to the sound of Joshua’s heartbeat. “Which one of you was first?”

Quiet. The sound of the movie felt so distant, a mere mumble of background noise as Jeonghan let out a long sigh.

“He was,” Jeonghan said. “I thought I’d be okay. Then we had to call our friend, Seungcheol, to help us.”

Joshua wrapped an arm around you. “Do you want me to be honest?”

You nodded.

“They still hurt sometimes,” he said. “The incisions. I can barely see them, but they’re still there.”

Suddenly, your stomach turned at the thought. You squeezed your eyes shut a little more. “I’m sorry--I know I brought it up, but can we drop this?”

Neither said anything. You merely curled up closer to the two people who’d been strangers until days ago, yet already felt so safe to be around. They felt like an escape from what you knew would come tomorrow. Even when Seokmin returned, curling up close to this bundle of limbs and shared trauma, you only felt safer.

Seungkwan had asked her to be his girlfriend. You only found out because he’d blasted it on every social media platform he was on, only tagged with the caption ‘day one ❤️‘ alongside a picture of the two of them silhouetted with the sunset in the background. Any other life and it’d be sweet. In this one, you merely felt bitter as you finally sent the text you’d been sitting on all day.

it’s really important. can we meet at the usual spot?

The moment he gave you his confirmation, you left your apartment. The park wasn’t too far from where you lived, although you’d always prefer to take the bus to it instead. With your coat pulled over your hoodie, you made the trek by foot instead. This used to be your picnic spot with Seungkwan, although you could easily see him going on dates there instead. As much as you wanted to be happy for him, the stupid ache in your lungs and the tickle of petals that eternally seemed to be plaguing you (at least it would be until you took your last dose of medicine before surgery--a smaller one than what you usually took to avoid complications, but enough that you’d be able to sleep easily) served as a cruel reminder of what would never be. That this would be the end.

Yet you saw him sitting on that stupid bench the two of you always met at, the glow of a streetlamp bathing him in light and making him look stupidly radiant. Or maybe that was what love could do to a person. The moment he saw you, he stood up, coming to hug you tight.

“Vernon said you’re having surgery tomorrow,” he said once he stepped back, hands holding your own. “Is it true?”

... At this point, you couldn’t be surprised Vernon would at least let that slip. Maybe he’d been debating coming to see you, and Vernon told him outright how important it was.

His fingers tangled with your own as he brought you to the bench, sitting down next to you. “Is it serious?” He paused, and then vaguely gestured toward his mouth and throat, “is it... you know?”

Seungkwan knew of your family history. You’d lamented it to him forever ago, saying that you hoped you’d be lucky enough to be spared by it. When you nodded, his gaze softened tremendously.

“Do they know?”

You don’t, you almost wanted to say. It’s you. I’m sorry. “I don’t know if I want to tell him.”

“Do I know them?”

You shook your head, unable to verbally lie to him.

He stared ahead, visibly upset. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t notice it sooner. I’ve just...”

He’d been falling for someone else more and more with each day. Deep down, you couldn’t blame him for that. If you didn’t know someone was going through it, you’d probably be blissfully doing the same.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been here for you,” he said a moment later. “Are you scared?”

“Terrified.” You tucked your hands into your hoodie pockets, leg bouncing. “I don’t know how I’m going to react.”

Seungkwan was good at faking smiles when things were rough, just to try and instill some confidence into someone who needed it. “You’ll pull through,” he squeezed your knee gently, and he left his hand there. “You’re strong. And... and when you get out, we’ll go out. Just the two of us. I’ll pay for our meal, and you can pick, and... and it’ll be thanks for helping me while you were struggling.”

Something about how genuine he sounded squeezed your heart tight, almost as if it’d pop with just a little more pressure. You looked up, “Seungkwan, I...”

I love you. I know you don’t love me back, and it’s okay. I’m sorry our friendship has to end like this.

And then he smiled at you, a little more genuine than before, just to reassure you. “It’ll be okay,” he said again, clueless to the storm inside of you.

Your words died in your throat. Instead, you just bit back your tears as you dove forward, hugging him tight. “I love you,” you said, a confession you couldn’t make directly to his face. “Thank you for being a good friend.”

His arms wound around you after a moment, squeezing you tight. “You’re not going to die, you know,” he said, laughing just a little. “It’s a safe procedure. I’ll see you when you wake up. Okay?”

Drifting back from him, you lied again, “Yeah. I’ll... I’ll see you then.”

With one truth spilling from your lips about going home and getting proper rest, the two of you parted ways. Despite the fact it only served to make your lungs ache worse, you jogged the way home. The sooner you were inside, the better. With the door shut and secured behind you, you let out a long sigh and then a groan of frustration at backing out yet again. You’d been pulling your jacket off when you heard Seokmin call out your name.

“Did you tell him?”

You sniffled hard, already feeling those tears welling back up. He opened his arms to you, and you almost tripped over yourself rushing to him as you broke down crying.

“I-I couldn’t,” you said between sobs.

And Seokmin could do nothing else but hold you tight, head resting against your own as he sheltered you through your storm.

Everything felt fuzzy.

The anesthesia hadn’t fully worn off by the time you were a little more awake. You’d answered their questions as best as you could while your head still felt full of clouds, but the procedure had been a success. The flowers were gone to good, likely going to get tossed out with the other waste and burned. Your mother recognized how completely out of it you still were, but you could see the relief on her face that you were okay. It took the sound of your dad gently coaxing her for her to agree to come back when you were far more lucid and well-rested.

At some point, Seokmin came in to see you. You barely remembered the encounter, but you stared at the teddy bear that sat nearby with a card being held between its plush paws (thanks to Seokmin’s efforts). It wasn’t from him, you’d later discover, but from Joshua and Jeonghan wishing you well (and making promises to see you again once you were discharged, maybe while you were recovering if they could make it during visiting hours).

Three days into your stay, you were fully aware and alert... and also recognizing the annoying tinge of pain that came from your incisions every single time you moved or even breathed. You could breathe clearer now, sure, but the ache was annoying nonetheless. Your doctor had been kind to you, understanding how tiring it could be to recover from the procedure. Your nurse, a tall kind man named Wonwoo, had taken your vitals. So when you heard a knock on your door, you were sure it was either whatever breakfast you were getting (you barely remembered your own order now), or your parents.

And after you called out for whoever it was to come in, you were met with Vernon’s face. He stopped where he stood, staring at you for a moment before apologizing and saying he wasn’t sure what to do. Chan was with him, too, hugging a big teddy bear that was clutching a ‘get well soon’ heart.

“You said not to send you flowers,” Chan said as he made his way over to you, and you accepted the stuffed animal with a thanks. “It was my idea.”

“Our idea,” Vernon rolled his eyes. Then he stopped, looking at the open door. “You wanted to see them. They’re awake.”

The guy that Vernon had been talking to walked into the room, pushing the door shut with an apology for hesitating. He started rambling about how he didn’t know whether you’d want so many people crowding you at once, sitting down at the edge of your bed as he started asking how you were doing. Were the flowers gone? Was the staff taking care of you? If you needed someone to speak on your behalf while your parents were gone, he would happily do it for you.

Vernon noticed the confused look on your face as this guy--friendly as he might be--kept talking to you. You’d answered his questions, sure, but you could see the way this stranger’s heart was visibly breaking in his eyes. His smile fell, and Vernon nudged him out of the way so that he could sit and talk to you for a few minutes. 

“Is there anything we can do for you? I mean, we were gonna pool together for one of those edible arrangements, but I wasn’t sure if your doctor was gonna restrict any of it...”

Chan had apologized, saying he needed a cup of coffee--it was too early for him--and he left with the other guy.

Vernon pushed himself back into your field of vision, and you felt yourself flounder a little for words. “No restrictions,” you said, brain still catching up as you had questions. “Sorry, Vernon, do I know him--”

He shook his head. “Nope. Just, uh... Rest up,” he patted your thigh. “I’ll see you when you get out, yeah?”

When he stepped back into the hallway, it was to the sound of Seungkwan sobbing. Chan had already gone to him, holding him and waving off any concerned staff that had probably seen this kind of thing before.

One of his best friends didn’t recognize him at all. He knew that that meant when it came to Hanahaki.

Chan had patted his back gently. “It’s not your fault you moved on,” he said quietly. “You didn’t know. None of us knew they liked you back--”

Vernon could feel his heart sink in his chest as he made his way over. His own future with you (as well as Chan’s) was in the air--both knowing the weight of keeping you in their lives could lead to future pain for both you and Seungkwan. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I told you--”

But Seungkwan shook his head, the weight of his own decisions beginning to suffocate him. “You were right,” he started to walk away, his heart breaking all over again. “I shouldn’t have come.”

taglist: @twancingyunhao​ @synthetickitsune​ @wonuziex​

[thekidsralright]

The Last Night

pairing: Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x female!reader

summary: it’s Bradley’s last night with you before deployment. He wants to make some memories before he goes…

warnings: this is 18+ folks, swearing, oral (f! receiving), piv sex, hard/rough sex, cum eating, mention of choking, bruises, biting, fluff and sweet moments can be found at the end after the filth

author note: omg my first attempt at writing smut ahhhhhh! It’s pretty short and sweet but tbh I just needed to bite the bullet and write something quick otherwise I never will. Hope it’s not too shabby, I mean I read enough smut to last a lifetime so it should be bearable at least lol

hope you enjoy!

He’s leaving tomorrow.

That’s all you can think about as Rooster kisses down your neck; leaving wet, red marks in his wake. You should be enjoying this, cherishing the time you have left before his deployment. But the only thought that keeps circling back around, haunting every touch, every glance, every kiss: he’s leaving tomorrow.

Rooster knows this is how you’ve been feeling for a while, which is why he doesn’t question why you grip his hand a little tighter sometimes, or start staring at nothing for a moment; lost in your own head with all the what if’s. He knows you’re not taking this well. To be honest, you both expected this reaction; it’s his first long-term deployment since you started dating. 3 months. What went in the blink of an eye when you first got together will now stretch itself into what will feel like years.

Neither of you are happy about it one bit. But the alternative to being apart is asking the man you love to give up his first ever love: flying. You could never do that to him, would never dream of it. Which is why you’re happy to shoulder the pain that comes with being a fighter pilot’s girl. Being Rooster’s anything is better than being nothing to him. Every touch reminds you of that.

“Come on hunny, play with me”. He’s still sucking on the skin of your neck, hands grabbing greedily at your back, your waist, your ass. He’s trying to distract you from your own head. And you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t starting to work. Slightly.

“I’m gonna miss you so bad, you have no idea” he whispers as his kisses start trailing over your shoulders, down to your chest.

Your hands go to the base of his neck, running your fingers up into his hair. Rooster hums in approval, happy you’re finally beginning to touch him as well. Ok, maybe his seduction tactics do work after all. You pull his head back up, pressing your bodies even closer than before; staring at one another.

“Just promise you’ll come back to me, Bradley. I can’t lose this…you”. You both pause, the movements of his mouth and hands halted. For a second, you wonder if he even heard you; he never gave a response. He just kisses you. Hard. He’s kissing you like he has never tasted anything so good and sweet and addicting in his life. Your breathing becomes heavy as he backs you up into the kitchen counter.

Moving his hands to the backs of your thighs, his voice rough, guttural, he tells you: “jump”. As you did, he helps you up, your legs immediately parting for him to move into. You need his body to be up against yours. You need to get your fix before it’s too late, before you only have your hand and imagination to use. You wrap your legs around him as he pulls you forward so that your ass is resting just on the edge.

He grinds and presses himself onto you. Even with jeans on, you can feel how hard he is and the pressure against your pussy makes you gasp. “You feel that baby? Every morning I wake up and every night I go to bed, I’m gonna be this fucking hard thinking of you…wishing you were there, that sweet mouth and pussy available for me to fuck and fill as much as I want.” His words make you shiver all over, your hands moving desperately over his body.

He reaches in between you both and grips your pussy, massaging you through your underwear. “And I know you’ll to be touching yourself too, riding your fingers until you scream out, wishing it was my cock inside you instead.” You moan at that, unable to stop yourself from lifting yourself onto his hand, providing more pressure.

“Please baby, I need this. We both do. Stop with the games and just…” you can’t finish the sentence before Bradley’s hands are already pulling your underwear to one side and rubbing his fingers up your centre. You cry out, gripping his shoulders tightly as he kneels before you.

“I want to see you come undone sweetheart. I need some memories to take with me”. As he puts his mouth onto your clit, sucking in as his tongue plays with you, you’re more than happy to oblige him. His hands grip your thighs tight, most likely leaving bruises in their wake but you couldn’t care less when his head is between your legs, making you feel so fucking good. Bradley knows you like to see marks on yourself after you fuck, and he won’t admit it but he loves to see them too. So, when he grips too tight or bites too hard, you both know it just gets you off even more.

“I need you in me. Please just fuck me already” you whine as his hands move to your tits, squeezing your nipples so hard you almost cry out. Rooster looks up from your pussy long enough to give you that signature smirk that drew you to him when you first met, before saying “gotta say the magic words baby…who do you want to fuck you?”

You let out a soft whine as his tongue continues its assault on your clit. He slaps your tits to get your attention back, as if it had gone anywhere else. “I want you to fuck me, Lieutenant Bradshaw”. Those were the words that got Bradley doing just about anything you wanted. Using his navy title was like playing the winning hand in a game of poker; you know it will come out on top every time.

Rooster gets up from the floor, hastily unbuckling his belt. You loved how eager he always was to go down on you and you regularly enjoyed returning the favour, but tonight was different. It felt like you didn’t have enough time for all of that, like he was being taken away from you right this second. You needed his cock inside you, filling you up. You craved the feeling of his cum dripping out of you, claiming you as his and leaving his mark in you before he goes.

Jeans discarded on the floor, Bradley pumps his cock once, twice in his hand and then up and down your now dripping pussy. It feels good, but you’re not in the mood for games. “You better fuck me right now Lieutenant, or I swear to god…” You didn’t get to finish before Rooster had silenced you with his hand around your throat and his cock pushed into you, right up to the hilt. You cry out, pain and pleasure mixing together as he’s just that big you sometimes forget how stretched you can feel when he’s fucking you hard.

“You’ll swear to who?... Hmm?...You’ll do nothing but fucking scream, do you hear me? You’ll be fucked senseless by the time I’m through with you and your tight, little cunt”. You love it when Bradley talks like this, so territorial and animalistic over you. Your moans of pleasure only spur him on to slam his cock into you harder, deeper. His balls smacking your skin as he rams into you over and over and over…

“Fuck, Bra- Oh my god, FUCK!” You can’t form any coherent words and his pace doesn’t slow down. Soon enough, sweat glistens off both of you and you can feel yourself getting close. He gathers your hair to the top of your head with one hand as the other grips your tit, using them to keep you in place.

“Wanna see that pretty face when you cum for me…wanna look at you when I cum inside your pussy baby”. He moves his hand back down from your tits to your clit, rubbing furiously once again. You reach your peak as your body racks and thrashes, screaming his name repeatedly, as if reciting a prayer. Rooster’s not far behind you as he fills you up, cock spasming in you as he grunts and moans loudly.

Both coming down from your highs, you stay in this position for a minute; soaking in the sight of each other whilst in this state. Bradley pulls out of you, watching the cum drip down, just like he wanted to see. He pushes his fingers in your tender pussy and you whimper as he does, pushing as much as he can back inside. Lifting them to your lips, you part yours wide enough for him, sucking his fingers clean and releasing them with a soft pop.

After staring at you for a moment, he asks with a furrowed brow “Was I too rough?” He does this every time and every answer you give him is the same. “No baby, I enjoyed it.” Bradley knew you did, he just needed assuring that he wasn’t pushing your body too far. Despite you both liking it rough, he cherished you and your body as if you were a god. He would never do anything you wouldn’t like, wouldn’t get off from. That’s what was so great about him: he always put you first.

“Come on, let’s get cleaned up. I wanna cuddle in bed and watch a sad movie” he says, helping you off the counter. And just like that, your sweet lil’ Rooster was back. You give a soft chuckle as you both make your way to the shower, Bradley’s arms wrapped around you, not quite ready to let go of one another just yet.

***

When you wake up, it’s still well before sunrise and it puts a small smile on your face to know that Rooster is still yours for a little longer. You turn over and see that he’s already awake, stroking your arm lightly. “Sorry if I woke you” he mumbles quietly into the still dark room. You take his hand and weave your fingers through his, brushing your lips over each one softly. “Don’t be sorry, I need all the time I can get with you”. You smile as you say this, trying to keep the mood light but failing terribly. Those thoughts you were having last night have returned in full force and the last thing you want to do is think about leaving this bed, this room, and letting Rooster go.

He notices your eyes welling and pulls your body into his, cuddling you to him. “Shh…shh baby it’s ok” he tries to reassure you, despite his throat getting clogged up at his own, similar thoughts. You both lay there like that for a while, afraid to loosen your grip on each other, content to stay like this forever. Bradley pulls away just enough that you’re face to face, staring into one another’s eyes.

“As mind-blowingly epic as last night was, and trust me I won’t be forgetting it any time soon…I’m gonna miss this the most. Holding you. Waking up with you next to me and knowing whatever I gotta do, it’s fine because I got my girl with me…you’re…” Bradley pauses, eyes glassy with unshed tears as he cups the side of your face “you’re my best friend”.

You don’t know what to say, maybe because nothing has to be said. So, you pull him back to you and stay intertwined until the sun rises and the alarm clock rings. For a while, neither of you move to turn it off. You just enjoy this small slice of peace that is each other, experiencing the end of one of the many last nights you will spend together.