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msafterhours · 10 months

Text

Two Hands

Male Reader x woo!ah! & EL7Z UP Nana (Nayeon)

~25k words

“We should do this more often,” Nayeon murmurs into your chest.

“I mean, sure, I’d be happy to come support your group any time I’m not—”

“No, not that!” she exclaims, giggling slightly as she pulls away just enough to look up at you. “I mean this.”

And she pulls you in even tighter, leaving you short of breath in more ways than one.

Nights like this make you wish the world was a bit kinder to you. You’re bundled under multitudes of layers of thick clothes, thin mask and scarf completing your near head to toe coverage, yet you still can’t seem to keep your teeth from chattering incessantly. Your efforts manage to preserve some of your warmth, but another shiver reminds you of the urgent need to get inside and get some food inside of you. It’s really, really cold outside.

Thus, you swear the gleaming gates of heaven themselves stand before you when you catch a glimpse of the bright lights of your favorite little ramen shop. Fighting against the harsh winter air, you trudge through the icy slush, cursing the severity of the snowstorm and the stupidity of your decision to splurge on a new pair of casual shoes instead of investing in more functional footwear. It’s really, really cold outside.

A sigh of relief escapes your lips as you open the door and feel the warm embrace of the heated air, but your solace is swiftly supplanted by dread as you look around and notice that the shop’s well over full capacity, with little if any seating room available.

"Whatever, let's just get in line and hope for the best," you think to yourself as you take your place in line behind a pair of old ladies.

“I swear, it was a rabbit that ran past us!” one exclaims.

“Absolutely not, I know a squirrel when I see one!” the other insists, stomping her foot in frustration.

tick...

tock...

After a few surprisingly entertaining minutes, you finally make it to the front of the line and the familiar face behind the counter.

"The same as the last hundred or so times?" the old lady asks with a wry smile.

"Hey hey hey, ninety-two times, thank you very much!" you answer with mock indignation. "But yes, I’m well aware how much of my budget goes to your shop, Aunt Kim."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," she fires back, tapping away at the screen as she yells your order to the kitchen. "Would you?"

"Absolutely not," you answer without hesitation as you leave a generous tip. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna attempt the impossible and try to find somewhere to sit in your stupidly crowded shop."

"Good luck!" she calls out as you turn and walk away. "You're going to need it!"

You sweep the room once, twice. Neither survey produces anything but depressing results. A third time, just in case. Nothing’s changed. A heavy, dramatic sigh escapes you as you ready yourself to accept your seemingly inevitable fate. But before you can concede, a bright glint in the corner of your vision offers hope, causing you to turn and find what you've been desperately looking for.

A girl, seemingly around your age, with glowing golden hair that shines brilliantly, reflecting the warm yellow lights scattered around the shop, sits alone. Your heart leaps for joy as you see, most importantly, an unutilized chair across from her. You cling to that shred of hope, quickly making your way over before coming to a stop in front of her table.

A few moments more than you can endure pass as she continues to tap away her phone, either not noticing your presence or choosing to ignore it. Eventually, you clear your throat and wave your hand in front of her, causing her to jump slightly and finally look up at you. Your eyes meet, and you feel the words escape your mind in the moment you hold her gaze. It takes a second, then another, but you finally remember your goal and cease your staring.

"Um, sorry to bother you, but … there are no other seats available, and I really, really, don't want to have to go outside again yet," you hurriedly explain, praying to whoever’s listening that this random, empyrean being you just met might miraculously take pity upon you. "Would it be alright if I sat here with you?"

She regards you for many moments, each feeling like an eternity as you stand there awkwardly. She stares, deep into your eyes then deeper still, hunting an ulterior motive. Her eyes flash and dart, scanning the singular you as if you’re an entire crowd. You know not what she searches for, but whatever test of virtue you’re subjected to, she seems satisfied with the result as she nods and gestures to the seat across from her.

You finally release the breath you hadn't realized you were holding, thanking her profusely as you join her at the table.

Your display finally earns a crack in the ice, shifting her skeptical expression to one of sick amusement as she comments, "If you’re this scared of the cold, why are you out so late? Surely you didn’t forget to go shopping before the snowstorm … right? Surely."

You feel your ears burning with a warmth from deep, deep within as your embarrassment flares up. Your initial response tells truths, but her smug expression leads your words elsewhere. "Would you believe I just really wanted ramen from my favorite shop and was willing to suffer the consequences to do so?"

Her sinister smile widens as she leans in and counters, "I just might … if you didn't sound like a guilty schoolboy who got caught trying to copy someone's test answers."

She holds your gaze once again, deep brown eyes delving into the depths of your soul, trapping you within a pocket of agonizing silence amongst the shop’s raucous atmosphere.

"Well?" she whispers breathlessly. "Are you gonna use your words? Or are you just gonna let those firetruck red ears do the talking?"

You exhale heavily, feeling your faux hubris exit your body as you confess, "Alright, fine. You got me. No more lies. I might've sorta ruined up my planning for the week and ran out of food last night, alright? Now, please, I beg you, stop looking at me like that."

Your response catches her off guard, but you’re quick to join her in shock as she bursts into a quiet fit of laughter. Her mirth immediately entrances you; each note a part of the chorus that dances on your eardrums and seals itself deep into your heart.

You wrack your brain for a proper retort, hoping to turn the tides of this war of words, but your rebuttal is prevented by the arrival of Aunt Kim with your meal. You thank her profusely as she sets it down, earning a smile before she turns to address your companion.

"Would you like me to take your bowl, Nayeon?" she asks, smiling at your companion in a way you’d believed was reserved for only you.

"Yes please, thank you, ma'am," Nayeon responds, picking up the bowl and handing it to her.

"Bah, you and your stubbornness," Aunt Kim grumbles. "With how often you come here, the formality just feels stuffy. Just call me Aunt Kim like this other addict does."

“I could probably do that. You could also agree to call me Nana like all my other friends do,” Nayeon answers back, a genuine smile gracing her features for the first time you’ve seen.

Aunt Kim rolls her eyes dramatically as she pats your head affectionately in the way she knows you hate, then walks away with that same warm smile that you’d thought was saved exclusively for you, but now know is also shared with the girl sitting across from you.

"Oh, you’re a regular too?" you ask as you begin to enjoy your meal. "I'm surprised I haven't seen you before."

"I'm usually here later," Nayeon responds as she idly taps away on her phone again. "Not huge on coming here when it's so busy."

"I totally get that. I'm usually here earlier, before the big rush, but this week has been crazy. Add the storm on top of that, and I guess that leaves me here, forced to settle for getting swept up in the dinner surge."

"Oh, so you're settling for my company, huh? I see how it is," Nayeon replies, feigning indignation as she crosses her arms and huffs in disbelief. "I guess next time a popsicle wants to share a table, I'll make sure to send him back to the freezer."

"Hey hey hey, easy now," you reply, raising your hands in surrender. "I'm not a huge fan of this chaos either, but I am eternally grateful for your company and your great sacrifice of existing in my vicinity."

"You're very welcome," Nayeon offhandedly remarks. "Your expression mid-head pat was almost hilarious enough to justify my continued tolerance of your presence."

And just like that, you feel the conversation derail, coming to a screeching halt as hints of embarrassment creep up your neck and render your face even more flush. With a grumble and a rather undignified pout, you let your eyes fall to the far warmer bowl of ramen that awaits you and begin enjoying your meal, causing Nayeon to hum in amused satisfaction at your surrender as she returns to her phone and resumes tapping away at what sounds like a game.

While you'd begrudgingly admit that you’ve enjoyed the conversation thus far, you’re pleasantly surprised at how easy it is to simply enjoy the serene feeling of sharing Nayeon's company. In fact, the silence grants you a brief chance to study the countenance of your dining companion, and you’re more than happy to seize the opportunity.

It seems that the only thing sharper than her words is her jawline, which is itself a sharp contrast from her other, softer features. As much as you wish you could stare back into her eyes once more, her downward gaze and focus on her phone makes doing so impossible, "forcing" you instead to focus on her lips, which she occasionally bites in frustration, causing your heart to swell in a way that feels unsafe yet anything but unnatural.

"Enjoying the view?"

Well shit.

Your eyes barely have to drift upwards to meet her gaze, where her eyes await you once more with a scrutinizing yet intrigued twinkle. While only moments ago you were wishing you could stare into her eyes once more, the combination of the intensity of her stare and your embarrassment forces you to look down in shame as you meekly mutter a quiet apology.

"Nah, you're not getting off that easily," Nayeon says, setting aside her phone and leaning in. "What'd you think? And please do be honest. You wouldn’t want to break your promise, would you?"

After only a moment's hesitation, you stare back into her eyes and open the floodgates.

"Well, it's only been a couple minutes, but I've decided that I love the way your hair glows like golden honey in this light, I'm pretty sure your jawline is sharp enough to cut through diamond, and I'm definitely sure that if you keep biting your lip the way you do whenever you're focused or frustrated or whatever that I'm going to be too dizzy to walk home."

“...”

tick...

“Oh.”

tock...

The raucous atmosphere of the shop seems to once again fade away as you intently hold the gaze of the girl you recently met but feel like you’ve known forever. You can’t shake this odd sense of familiarity, like you had seen her before somewhere, but can’t quite put your finger on where.

Regardless, by this point, the silence between you has stretched to an uncomfortable length of time. After bearing it a moment longer as you attempt to gather your resolve, you ask, "So, uh, what do you think? I mean, I'd also prefer it if you were honest, but I don't have a promise to hold you to, so I guess I'll just have to settle for asking nicely and hoping for the best?"

Your follow-up seems to finally shock Nayeon out of her reverie, leading her to finally pick her jaw up off the floor and respond, "I mean, okay, good to know. A little much, not gonna lie, but keep talking like that and I might have to let you keep doing what you're doing. Can’t say I hate the attention."

She pauses for a moment, allowing her eyes to run across your upper body before meeting your gaze once more and adding, "And hey, you're not too rough on the eyes either."

tick...

Only a single serene second slips by as you hold each other's gaze before you see inspiration flash across her visage. The glimmer in her eyes is quickly joined by a familiar smirk as she glances down to your lips before returning to look you in the eyes.

Then she steals your heart.

Again.

With that unreasonably sultry lip bite.

Again.

"And I thought the cold was going to be the reason I died tonight," you whisper, quietly enough that only she could hear.

Just in case she hadn't yet properly staked her claim on your heart, Nayeon responds with potentially the only thing more charming than her lip bites; her laughter, which once again resonates across the table directly through your eardrums, across your inner bridge, and into your heart.

You open your mouth, hoping to continue the conversation further, but find yourself abruptly cut off by a sudden series of discordant cacophonies as her phone vibrates harshly against the wooden table. You watch on in poorly hidden dismay as she checks it and her mirthful expression transforms into a grimace at the messages' contents.

"Ugh, I need to get back to my place," she explains as she begins to gather her things.

"Oh, okay," you sigh. "Thanks again for letting me sit with you and for the … mostly pleasant conversation."

Her frown fades, revealing hints of the smile hidden within. "Sure, no problem. I'm sure Ms. Kim would have wanted me dead if she heard I mistreated her other major source of income."

You can’t help but chuckle at her words, though the laughter feels cheerless in the face of more pressing concerns. "Am I going to see you again?"

Her eyes stare into your own once more, piercing through to your core. "Who knows? We've been coming to this shop as frequently as we have for as long as we have for who knows how long and haven't run into each other until now. Who's to say it won't take another couple of years until our paths cross again?"

And with that sobering perspective, the girl you’ve come to know as Nayeon stands, giving you only the slightest nod in farewell before stepping away from the table. You watch her as she takes her first few steps, feeling your heart sink lower and lower as the distance between you grows larger and larger.

tock...

But suddenly, you almost swear you can see a lightbulb go off above her head, causing her to turn and walk back to the table.

"You know, I never did catch your name," Nayeon remarks casually.

Despite the exhilaration of your heart soaring at her return, you try to maintain a neutral expression as you reply, "Perfect, now we both have a reason to meet again."

While it might just be your imagination, you dare to hope that it’s your words that transform her sly smirk into a genuine smile that reaches her eyes.

"Oh yeah? What's your reason?"

"Who said I only have one?"

With her curiosity sated and ego sufficiently inflated, Nayeon gives you a small smile as a farewell, then turns and walks out of the ramen shop. And as the clock ticks ever onward and you sit alone at the table, pondering what impact this night might have on the rest of your life, you can only hope that she hasn’t walked away for the final time.

tick...

tock...

tick...

tock...

It really was bearable the first couple of days.

But the days turned to weeks and the weeks turned to months and the months began to feel like years. And as time mercilessly continues to pass by, you unsurprisingly find yourself increasingly affected by the thought of her.

You realized something was seriously wrong when entire weeks began to blur together and each visit to the ramen shop left you feeling colder and lonelier than your previous visit. It isn’t long before the intrusive thoughts remodel your mind and claim it as their own, leaving you wondering if you had lost your love for your favorite restaurant and your best chance at love in a single night. Despite the depressing potential of those dramatic notions, you attempt to cast them aside, instead focusing your efforts on maintaining your previous routine and, more importantly, meeting Nayeon again.

Since you assume Aunt Kim will rat you out to Nayeon if you’re too desperate in your attempts, you choose a more subtle approach. Instead of showing up every night, you alter your schedule to better fit hers. The awkward “middle” shifts at your work are rarely prioritized, so you’re easily able to make the change and justify your abnormally late arrivals to the shop.

However, your efforts fall short, leaving you wanting, craving even a glimpse of the radiant smile that graces your dreams far more often than you’d readily admit. And even though you desperately want to ask Aunt Kim if she’s even seen Nayeon, you’re well aware that outside assistance would break the unspoken rules of the game. So, even as your heart yearns for her, you choose to continue playing. Even in the face of defeat, you persevere.

All the while, a nagging feeling remains in the back of your mind. Though you can’t figure out why, you’re sure you know her from somewhere. The passage of time allows that nagging to fester, growing exponentially until it becomes all you can think about.

It’s not long before the pressure becomes unbearable, forcing you to cave. Nayeon’s a fairly popular name, but luckily, you’re able to fall back on her nickname of “Nana”. Thus, on a day that’s become your new norm, you dedicate part of your shift to searching through Naver pages, eventually finding what you’ve been looking for. Kind of.

You find that she’s the main dancer and leader of a girl group named woo!ah!, one of the seemingly endless number of new K-Pop groups that’ve slipped under your radar. As you scroll through the pages and watch video after video, you unsurprisingly enjoy their music, yet feel a sense of unease grow with each passing video. You’d expected feelings of excitement and joy to burst forth with each of Nayeon’s appearances, but instead you’re met by dread, trepidation, and a plethora of other unpleasant emotions that you can’t identify amidst the maelstrom rampaging in your heart.

You finish their MV playlist depressingly quickly, finding far more questions than answers at the end of this rainbow. Unfortunately, before you can reach a satisfying conclusion, the clock strikes twelve and begins to sing, signaling the end of your shift. After packing up your things, you depart, and, following a short bus ride, you arrive at the intersection where you turn right to visit the noodle shop once again.

And an hour later, after you’ve stood in line, placed your order, found somewhere to sit, enjoyed your meal, and looked over every square millimeter of the room, you find yourself alone.

Once.

Again.

tick...

tock...

Seemingly a moment later, you’re surprised to find yourself at home. You rationalize that your body must have moved on its own and your brain must not have cared to encode the memory of walking this familiar path, but even this explanation leaves you with serious concerns. As you reach into your pocket and feel the warmth from your fingers being sapped by the key’s cold metal, you simply feel … tired.

What’s the point of changing your routine if your days are bound to end the same as always?

What’s the point of searching for warmth if you continue to be left alone in the cold?

What’s the point of listening to your heart if all it leads you to is the deafening silence of your empty apartment?

You can feel it in the air as you turn the key, open the door, and enter the suffocating silence of your apartment. The air’s cold. Heavy. The room’s dark. Empty. And you’re sure. Ready. As much as your heart yearns to chase Nayeon, your mind is telling you that it’s time. Time to return to the routine you’ve relied on for so, so long. You begin by sending a quick email to your supervisor, requesting a change back to your previous schedule. Then, after a few more hours that won’t be worth remembering, you willingly wade into the darkness.

You mourn the loss of what could have been. You allow the clouds to roll in, allow the falling rain to drown out the sounds of your heart beating against its cage and its cries for freedom. You pray that the storm will wash away the memories of that night. You hope, as desperately as ever, that you’ll find her. But if your heart can’t have what it wants, you’ll ask your mind to forget her.

tick…..

tock.

tick…..

tock.

Is it eight days later? Nine days? Ten? Your memory might have failed you again, but routine provides you necessary stability once more, helping you through the motions of working the once familiar morning shift before guiding you through the short bus ride to your stop and the subsequent walk to an always familiar intersection and a newly unwelcome decision.

If you simply continue forwards, you’ll arrive at your apartment, where you know that leftovers and loneliness amidst the silence of solitude awaits. However, if routine truly is still in the driver’s seat, you’ll turn to your right, towards Aunt Kim’s, where you know that ramen and loneliness amidst the voices of others awaits.

Thus, despite the clear blue sky and the bright sun that signaled the early signs of winter’s departure, decision paralysis sets in. The light flashes yellow, yet you need to decide, now. Then, it flashes red, yet you know you need to go. Finally, the indicator flashes green, yet you remain motionless as the crowd begins to surge past you.

It’s there, in that moment, where you stop fighting anxiety’s powerful pull, allowing it to drag you under, away from your routine. It’s there, in that moment, where you give up, instead electing to return home. Yet, it’s there, in that moment, where you feel a gentle tug on your arm and see a flash of warm golden light in your periphery.

"Come on, you gotta get there before it gets busy," Nayeon whispers, mock urgency masking her features and veiling her words. "Otherwise, you might have to ask some weirdo if you can share a table with them."

You’re all too eager to allow yourself to be dragged along, heart nearly bursting out of your chest as you loudly exclaim, “Nayeon! I—”

Your words are a jumbled mess, bouncing around the inside of your skull, desperately trying to escape all at once, but you hold them all back as the other pedestrians turn, glaring at you as they judge your sudden outburst. Once you finish offering meek smiles and apologetic waves, you whisper back, “You’re right, that sounds terrible! Let’s go!”

As she continues to drag you along, you take the opportunity to study the beaming visage of your guide once more. The passage of time allows you to view the literal girl of your dreams in a new light, and you find Nayeon’s just as radiant in today’s pleasant sunshine as she was so many weeks ago, hidden away from the harsh snowfalls of the early Korean winter.

"What should I say?" you wonder to yourself as you allow her to lead you down the busy sidewalk. "Would it be too forward to say I missed her after only meeting her once before?"

A familiar cadence, the ringing of a very particular bell, cuts your internal musings short, shunting you back into reality as Nayeon opens the door to Aunt Kim's ramen shop. Nayeon finally detaches from your arm, leaving you feeling cold and empty. Not unlike your freezer that fateful night, so many months ago.

After shaking off the last remnants of your reverie, you step forward and join her in line. Despite being a fair bit taller than her, you can’t seem to make out what exactly she’s doing on her phone as you both wait to place your order.

It only takes a few moments of snooping before a wave of guilt washes over you as you realize your invasion of her privacy, causing you to shift your gaze elsewhere, to other areas of the shop. Areas such as the table where you had sat the previous time, which currently sits unoccupied.

"Another missed opportunity," you think to yourself as you grieve the lost potential and come to another realization. "Not to mention the fact that she held the door for me because I was so lost in thought! Ugh, you're blowing it! Stop overthinking everything."

After a few short minutes idly spent looking anywhere except towards Nayeon, all of the customers in line in front of you finish placing their orders and go to find a seat. You aren’t surprised as Nayeon needs mere moments to recite her clearly well-practiced offer, but you are caught off guard when Aunt Kim leans close to Nayeon, whispering something you can’t make out amidst the low murmur of the crowd inhabiting your second home.

The rational part of your brain informs you that, at most, a few seconds pass. Your emotions tell a far different story, flooding your overwrought mind with a deluge of disquieting dangers and forcing you to consider each of the painful possibilities and worst-case scenarios that comprise the tsunami attempting to drag you into the depths of self-doubt. Eventually, the two part, and as Nayeon turns to face you, her mischievous expression and gleaming smile ignites a flame in you, burning away any frost that’s formed since you left her embrace.

Her eyes flick over towards Aunt Kim, seemingly challenging you to approach the elderly woman who stands behind the counter with crossed arms and a dangerously amused expression. This time, however, Nayeon doesn’t even give your words enough time to get caught in your throat, instead simply walking past you and allowing the silky strands of her hair to brush your shoulder and convey all the intent she needs to.

As you gather what little cognitive function remains, you’re especially grateful for the familiarity of this place as Aunt Kim enters your order with well-practiced quickness. You’re uncharacteristically afraid of meeting her eyes as you sign your name and begin to enter the same generous tip you’ve always given, but her scoff of indignation as you meekly hold out your hand for your order number forces you to do so.

"So." she says bluntly, withholding the plastic indicator as she awaits your response.

"Yes ma’am?” you ask, voice laced with saccharine innocence.

“Oh gods, don’t tell me that that girl’s stubbornness has infected you too,” Aunt Kim responds exasperatedly. “You finally managed to meet up with her again, eh?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you respond as you delete your previous number, instead entering an extra-large tip before braving Aunt Kim’s gaze once more, silently conveying your plea for mercy as you literally attempt to buy her silence.

Aunt Kim’s eyes flash down briefly, widening for a moment before a deep, jovial laugh echoes out from her, reverberating throughout the room as she holds your gaze once more.

“All right, act sly all you like. I'm just tired of seeing someone come in alone fifty times in a row just to spend their time here hoping and searching for a certain someone.”

The banter is unique, odd, and comfortably routine as you ease into its familiar warmth. Your brow arches dramatically as you declare, “Why Aunt Kim, I can’t stand these accusations! It’s only been forty-six times since then!”

You watch as Aunt Kim’s smile fades, shifting from a display of mirth to a thin obfuscation of sadness as she responds, “You’re not the only one who’s been sitting alone at a table for two. Now go!”

And as she pushes your number into your hands and sends your mind into a tailspin, you’re left with no other option but to turn and allow the next customer to set up. Your body’s autopilot takes over, turning you further until you face the table where this all started, only to find it occupied.

By none other than Nayeon herself.

You lock eyes for the briefest of moments before she avoids your gaze, poorly pretending to be enthralled by the black screen of her phone. As the slightest hints of confidence begin to emerge from within, you walk up to the table, acting as casually as you can, pulling out a chair and taking a seat across from her.

After offering up a prayer to whoever’s listening, desperately hoping that you wouldn’t blow this chance, you look straight at her and ask, “So, how have you been?”

“Oh, so we’re just getting right into it, huh?” Nayeon asks, already crafting the thin veneer of the haughtiness she’d used to shield herself before. “Not even going to thank me for saving you a seat? I know you’ve had issues finding them before.”

You raise your hands up in mock surrender as you admit, “Alright, fair enough. I am very grateful for your act of charity once again, and I’ll be sure to make it up to you.”

“I’m glad to see you’ve come to your senses,” she declares, obvious satisfaction in her smirk as she nods in approval. “To answer your question, I’ve been fortunate enough to be busy, so that’s always good. Aside from work, I guess it’s mostly just been working out, spending time with those I’m closest to, and coming here. What about you?”

“I’ve …” your voice trails off for a moment, granting you silence as you meticulously craft your next line. “I’ve had better months, but I honestly can’t complain too much. Work’s been consistent, so like you said, that’s always good. Plus, I always have this place to come back to, so that’s a big plus.”

“So, you come here often?” Nayeon asks, waggling her eyebrows in the most tropey, dramatic way possible. It’s clearly meant to be humorous, and you’re all too eager to reward her efforts with a smile. You just also hope it buys you time to reclaim the breath she steals so easily.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," you say, chuckling slightly as you struggle against all the unwelcome thoughts and emotions that continuously threaten to boil over. "Especially the past couple of months, I'm fairly sure I've made a sizeable contribution to the 'Kim Family College Fund'. What about you, have you also been a generous donor?"

And there it is. For the first time since that night a lifetime ago, your words strike a chord, and your just reward is the melodious laughter that bursts free from the alluring lips of Nayeon before gently drifting across the table and imprinting itself once again upon your soul. And all you can wonder is why you’d ever choose to stop chasing her.

After the briefest of stanzas, her mirthful song quiets and her words shift to a whisper. "Listen, if my friends ever find out just how often I've been coming here and how much I've spent, it’ll be the last day I see the sun! So shhh!"

The quiet laugh that resonates out straight from your heart may not be planned or voluntary, but anyone paying a modicum of attention can easily tell it’s genuine. You feel free, weightless even, to an extent you haven’t felt since a certain night so many weeks ago. And as you savor this moment of warmth, of dethawing even, you’re glad to see that same joy mirrored in the eyes and smile of Nayeon too.

"Alright, fair enough. Not a word to your friends, and you won't rat me out to mine? Deal?"

"Deal!" she responds eagerly, extending her hand out to shake yours.

Without hesitation, you reach out and seal the pact, cherishing the influx of warmth generated by even the swiftest second of your fingertips grazing the soft skin of her palm.

But then, just like that, it’s gone. The briefest moment of contact ends all too soon, and you find yourself in silence once more.

Fortunately, this time it doesn’t last, as Nayeon speaks up once more.

"So … any particular reason you've been around more often recently?" she asks as she looks around in a familiar pattern, seemingly fascinated by the decorations of the place she must have visited hundreds of times.

"I might have a reason," you respond suavely as you lean back in your chair. "Maybe even a couple."

"Oh yeah?" she asks, ending her search as she reaches her destination: your eyes. "Pardon my vanity, but is there any chance … I’m one of those reasons?"

In this moment, this secular moment of confession, this seductress needs no lip bites nor any promises of sweet nothings to ensnare your heart even further. All you need is to look into her eyes, where you see the same earnest anticipation mirrored within your own soul.

So, in this moment, you give yourself no time to second guess yourself, acting on pure instinct as you take out your heart, affix it to your sleeve in full view of everyone within the restaurant, and admit, "Yeah, I mean, you’re the only reason that mattered. I guess … I was scared of the thought of never seeing you again. I really missed you."

tick...

Another moment passes. But this stretch of silence is far shorter than the last and her response is far quicker than last time you’d shared a confession. This time, it’s her words that shock you.

"Thanks, I … uh, really missed you too," she whispers softly, perhaps trying to preserve the serenity of this moment between the two of you.

tock...

Milliseconds begin to feel like minutes as you desperately rack your brain, searching for an adequate continuation to the conversation. Fortunately, just as desperation tips over into despair, none other than Aunt Kim comes to your rescue, carrying a pair of bowls in her hands and a complicated collection of emotions across her countenance.

First, she offers Nayeon her warm bowl with an even warmer smile, which Nayeon is happy to return in kind. Then, just as you recover from being blinded by Nayeon’s radiance, Aunt Kim turns to you, deliberately holding back your bowl as she offers nothing but a quirked eyebrow and an expectant expression.

You raise your hands in surrender once more, internally cursing the developing trend as you ask, “What, Miss Aunt Kim, could you possibly be expecting from me? Ma’am.”

You aren’t sure if it’s your sheepish expression or Aunt Kim’s sigh of exasperation that sparks it, but whatever semblance of a train of thought you’d begun crafting is sent careening off the rails by the return of that same singsong laughter that’s lifted your spirits up from the depths they’d plummeted to.

While Nayeon continues her chorus of joy, you watch as Aunt Kim’s frosty exterior thaws, causing her to gently place the bowl in your hands before pulling away just the slightest bit.

“I’m just glad things finally lined up,” Aunt Kim says with a knowing smile and another ruffling of your hair that earns another round of laughter from Nayeon.

Finally, that last embarrassment inflicted, Aunt Kim elects to leave you in peace.

After months of waiting, the culmination of all your fantasies is … a conversation. About nothing. About everything. About your job as an editor at a K-Pop news / blog site and how the recent schedule change left you saddled with a writer who’d recently gotten in trouble for “not including all the members when describing a group’s latest comeback” or something. About her job as an idol and the years of struggle and the stress of debuting and her relationships with her members and fan interactions and on and on and on.

It’s the most mundane human experience you’ve ever had, but it’s warm. It lasts from your usual arrival time until Nayeon’s usual time of departure, yet time seems to pass by in an instant. It’s nothing you would have expected yet everything you could possibly ask for, like a waking dream. It’s almost unfathomable how much you enjoy yourself.

It also has to end.

“Hey,” Nayeon says suddenly, allowing her voice to soften. “The shop’s closing soon.”

“Oh, right,” you say, feeling your smile fade for the first time in hours.

“We should, uh …”

“Yeah, let’s—”

“Yeah.”

The dusty old chairs creak against the stained floorboards of the shop as you both slowly slide them back, hoping that your sluggish movements will elongate this experience. Each of you bids farewell to Aunt Kim in your own special way, then turn to depart. And as you open the door for her and the brisk evening wind leaves you scrambling for the right words, it’s Nayeon who finds her courage first.

“We’ll be performing next Saturday,” she begins, speaking just loud enough for her words to reach your ears before the cruel winds can whisk them away. “I understand if you’re busy, but—”

“I’ll be there.”

And just as the door closes and you put forth your promise, the jingle of the bells and Nayeon’s relieved laughter join in harmony, creating a melody that wraps itself around you and promises to protect you from the cold.

“I haven’t even told you where it is yet!” she exclaims, meeting your eyes once more.

“Then I should probably give you my number, no?” you counter, holding her gaze as she looks back with the softest eyes and warmest smile.

“That sounds like a great idea,” Nayeon says, eagerly pulling out her phone and handing it to you.

You quickly punch in the digits and hand it back to her, earning a frown in response.

“What is it?”

“You still haven’t told me your name.”

So, you tell her. And she repeats it back to you. And it’s no surprise that the sound of your name in her mouth is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever heard. And you’re still reeling from that when she texts you, “Hi it’s me!🐇”. And when you finally manage to tear your eyes from the screen, you’re met with the sight of her meekly looking down at the sidewalk below.

“Hey,” you say softly, giving her a moment to meet your eyes before opening your arms. “You—”

Your words don’t even have a chance to be whisked away by the cruel winds before Nayeon darts over and crashes into your chest, driving the air from your lungs as she wraps her arms around you. Instinctually, you wrap your own arms around her, holding her close and refusing to let go.

“Stay warm, okay?” you whisper, only for her ears.

“I think I’ll be just fine,” she whispers back, just as softly.

And it’s hard when you two untangle yourselves. And it’s harder to say goodbye. And it’s nearly impossible to turn away. But it’s easy to turn back and look at her. And you see Nayeon walking, no, almost skipping away down the sidewalk. And you know that the months-long wait was worth it. And the next ten days will feel like a decade.

But that’ll be worth the wait too.

tick…

tock…

tick…

tock…

This time, you know exactly how long it’s been. You’ve checked the clock every hour of the past ten days, desperately awaiting the chance to see her again. Absolutely dreading the thought of seeing her again.

Your anxiety certainly isn’t helped by the sea of lightsticks and legions of chanting fans wielding them. Amidst this squall of rabid passion, you can’t help but feel underprepared. You can’t help but feel nervous. You can’t help but feel insignificant.

Fortunately, by the time you’re able to make your way up closer to the front, the performances have started and begun to wash away some of that negativity. You lose yourself in the stages, showing support to these young adults, these kids, who’re giving everything they have to try and achieve their dreams. It really is an enjoyable way to spend an afternoon.

Yet your throat still dries up when you hear them announce who’s performing next. All of a sudden, the room floods, dragging you under; the blood rushes in, waves deafening you.

tick…

They come out on stage.

tock…

Your eyes can’t look anywhere else.

tick… tock…

“Nana” says something that you can’t hear.

tick…tock…

They get in position. tick..tock..tick.. They begin. ticktockticktockticktocktick

And then, just like that, it’s over. The performance ends and the group bids the crowd farewell, leaving you with far fewer thoughts than you anticipated but far more emotions than you’re prepared for. At the forefront of your mind, a singular idea, the catalyst of the storm, reverberates incessantly with a single realization.

Nayeon’s eyes didn't meet yours a single time throughout the whole performance, yet she spent the entire time smiling brighter than you’ve ever seen.

You somehow manage to stumble through the crowd, moving towards an exit as they roar in excitement at the announcement of the next performers, a group you’ve followed since debut and one you like quite a lot. A group that doesn’t matter.

It’s only once you get outside, once you’re able to take a moment amidst the early evening air, that your breathing begins to slow. It’s there that the blood pumping in your ears begins to settle. It’s there that the vibration on your leg nearly makes you jump out of your skin. But once you nail the three-point landing, you pull out your phone and read the new message:

Nayeon 🐇 (6:02pm): Hey, were you able to make it? I just peeked my head out but couldn’t find you anywhere.

You (6:03pm): I did! Sorry, I just stepped outside after watching your performance, needed some air

You (6:03pm): You guys were great!

Nayeon🐇 (6:03pm): Awww, thanks so much!!

Nayeon🐇 (6:03pm): You should come around the back, I wanna introduce you to everyone!

Nayeon🐇 (6:04pm): Meet me at door E35, I’ll let you in

You (6:06pm): Sure, I’m on my way

You hit send, finally responding after needing a minute to calm the upswell of sanguine tides that continue to thrash within. Your steps are heavy, echoing loudly throughout the packed parking lot and even louder in your mind as you begin discerning which feelings surround this storm’s catalyst.

The unfamiliar feeling doesn’t remind you of the anxiety you’ve faced before, nor does it remind you of the self-doubt you’ve suffered in your past. No, when you round the corner to see Nayeon’s head poking out the door, looking for you, and you hear the crowd’s thunderous applause, you know exactly which ugly emotion torments you. And despite having no right to feel the way you do, you know that jealousy gnaws at your core.

So, when Nayeon turns and locks eyes with you, you hope your smile shows delight, not despair. And while you don’t quite match the radiance of her reaction, you’re inviting enough for her to throw open the door and begin dashing towards you. Fortunately, your limbs seem to have higher priorities than jealousy, as you too begin closing the distance and opening your arms, meeting her halfway and tightly wrapping your arms around her as she does the same to you.

Your ability to string together sentences escapes you as you hold her close, feeling her heartbeat hammer against your chest at as rapid a pace as your own.

“We should do this more often,” Nayeon murmurs into your chest.

“I mean, sure, I’d be happy to come support your group any time I’m not—”

“No, not that!” she exclaims, giggling slightly as she pulls away just enough to look up at you. “I mean this.”

And she pulls you in even tighter, leaving you short of breath in more ways than one.

“But also, thank you for coming to see us perform. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”

“Of course,” you say, heart penning your words before your brain can intervene. “Anything for you.”

“Anything?” Nayeon asks incredulously, finally breaking the hug as the mischievous glint in her eye returns. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“I stand by my word,” you respond, acting far more confidently than you truly feel. “Besides, how dangerous could you possibly be?”

“Are you looking to find out?” she asks, smiling deviously as you see the turning gears in her head shift into overdrive.

“Maybe one day,” you say with a shrug. “Must admit, it’s not high on my list of priorities though.”

“Oh yeah? What’s number one?”

“Why spoil the surprise? Gotta keep you coming back somehow.”

Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise as Nayeon scoffs in response. “Yeah, like that’s a concern.”

“I, uh, thanks?” you sputter, unable to do anything further as the mechanisms of your mind malfunction.

“Oh!” she exclaims, face alight with merriment and mischief alike. “You are in danger.”

All you can do is shrug. Why try to hide what you both know to be true? Why not join her in laughter instead?

“Hey,” you say a few seconds later as you catch a brief glimpse of your breath in the air. “We should get you inside, it's too cold for you to be out here in a sleeveless top and those ‘shorts’.”

“What do you mean?” Nayeon asks incredulously. “I think my stylist absolutely nailed it today.”

“Yeah, like anything you wear could look bad,” you scoff. “I'm just worried about you turning into a popsicle.”

“Oh? I guess I'll just have to find someone to keep me warm,” she drawls as she walks back to the door. “You wouldn't mind, would you?”

“Of course not.”

“Of course not,” she repeats, flashing the smallest of smirks your way before turning back and stepping up to the door. “Anything for me, right?”

“I mean …” you begin to say. Unfortunately, your train of thought is brought to a screeching halt by the rather rude sound of the unmoving door handle within Nayeon’s grasp.

“Wonderful,” Nayeon says, exasperation coating her words as she runs her fingers through her hair. “And on the one day I forgot to charge my phone too.”

“You can borrow mine,” you offer, reaching into your pocket and holding it out to her. “Can you call someone inside who can open it?”

“Yes, I can!” she says, eagerly accepting your offer and taking your phone. “Give me a second, I'll see if Wooyeon's willing to help.”

A few moments later, after she's punched in the numbers and the phone's begun to ring, she looks up with that same cheeky smile she wears so frequently around you.

“Guess you're stuck with me a bit longer,” she dramatically declares.

“Woe is me,” you respond in kind, pressing the back of your hand to your forehead like you're about to faint.

Nayeon opens her mouth to fire back, but her reply is superseded by a muffled, vaguely familiar voice emanating out from the speaker.

“Hey, it's me,” she remarks casually, as if calling someone from a random number is a totally normal thing to do. “I need—”

She stops mid-sentence, seemingly allowing the person on the other end to voice their apparently substantial list of frustrations at Nayeon.

“Yeah, I, uh, sorry about slipping away like that,” Nayeon replies sheepishly as her cheeks flare in an entirely new way. “It's a very long story that I very much don't want to get into tonight, but can you please come open door E35? I might have locked myself out.”

It's a tense few moments of silence before Nayeon gets a response. What you assume to merely be a few words at most still manages to shock Nayeon, leaving her wide eyed as she responds, “That's a lot to ask for just—”

Her words are suddenly cut off by what you assume to be Wooyeon's response, causing Nayeon to roll her eyes in resignation before responding, “Okay! Sure, fine. Both rooms, before the performance on Wednesday. Got it.”

“Alright, see you soon,” she continues. “And Wooyeon? Thank you.”

“Here, thanks for letting me borrow that,” Nayeon says, handing you back your phone.

“Of course,” you respond. “What were you two arguing about?”

“Honestly it was more bargaining than arguing,” Nayeon groans, throwing her head back in frustration. “A trade I horribly lost, mind you. Apparently in her mind, a three-minute walk is worth me having to clean both bedrooms at the dorms.”

“That seems … harsh,” you say, earning a shrug in response.

The silence goes unbroken for a minute. Then another. But when it's finally broken, it's not by words, but the chattering of teeth. Hers.

Fortunately, your movements are so instinctual that by the time your brain has even begun to consider overthinking things, you've already taken off your jacket and wrapped it around her. Nayeon’s shivering swiftly slows, but you leave your arm wrapped around her. Just in case.

tick…

tock…

It ends up being ten minutes, not three, that you share in silence. Not that either of you notice or care.

As soon as you hear the handle begin to turn, you immediately pull away, earning the smallest of whines from Nayeon before she too hears the door opening and turns towards it.

“There you are!” both girls exclaim as you see one of the other members from the earlier performance poke her head out.

“What took you so long?” Nayeon asks. “I thought it'd take four minutes max to find us.”

“Listen, we can discuss whether or not I got lost once you get inside,” Wooyeon huffs in response. “Come on, it's freezing out here!”

“You're telling me,” you mutter, causing Nayeon to quietly chuckle as she looks up at you with wide, apology-filled eyes.

You both follow Wooyeon inside, where Nayeon introduces you to one another and informs Wooyeon that she had invited you. After an exchange of slightly awkward bows, Wooyeon speaks up.

“Okay, so this story involves you and a guy, alone, in the middle of a parking lot on a dark and stormy evening? I don't care how long it is, you're telling me everything.”

“I … fine. We can talk on the drive back,” Nayeon begrudgingly accepts.

“Good. Speaking of, we should head back. Now, preferably. They're probably waiting on us,” Wooyeon says, shooting you a sympathetic glance.

“Hey, it's alright,” you tell Nayeon as she turns to look at you. “I'm just glad I got to see you. The performance and everything else were just icing on the cake.”

“Everything else, huh?” Wooyeon asks, seemingly more invested suddenly. “How late is this story going to keep me up?”

“Oh relax,” Nayeon scoffs, shaking her head at Wooyeon's instigation attempts.

“But seriously,” she says to you. “Thanks for being understanding.”

“Also, thanks for this,” Nayeon continues, smirking at you as she points to your jacket.

“Of course,” you immediately respond. “Anything for you.”

You watch as Nayeon’s cheeky expression morphs into confusion, like your response was outside the rules of the game you’re both playing.

“I, uh, thanks?” she sputters. But that confusion doesn't last, and a warm smile is quick to replace it.

“Here then,” she murmurs, closing the distance between you two quicker than you're able to respond. “This is for you.”

And there's a lot of small details that you'll forget in hindsight. Like the way Nayeon stands up on her tiptoes, or how she tilts her head just the slightest bit, or even the glittery eyeshadow that gleams in the light. But there's one detail you'll remember. Because you'll never forget the feeling of her soft lips against your cheek.

You can't help but hate the moment she pulls away. But when she locks eyes with you, you're brave enough to hope that you'll feel that sensation again.

“Bye,” she whispers.

“Bye.”

“...”

“Bye?” Wooyeon says, offering you a slightly awkward wave as you turn to face her.

You look back to Nayeon, and neither of you can help but laugh at Wooyeon's shell-shocked expression. One theatrical sigh and an eye roll later, Wooyeon turns and begins to walk away.

“Bye Wooyeon!” you call out at the retreating form. “Hopefully next time we meet, it'll be a little more normal!”

“Hard not to be!” she calls back, earning another duet of laughter from you and Nayeon.

“I should probably follow her,” Nayeon says. “We're performing Wednesday night, so I guess I'll see you at the shop on Thursday? Unless you—”

“I'll be there,” you say, fighting back the jealous feelings that surge up at the thought of her performing again.

“You're the best,” she says, throwing her arms around you for the briefest of moments before turning and hurriedly following Wooyeon. “I'll text you the location!”

“Sounds good, see you there!” you call out in response. You can't help but feel glued to the floor as you watch her walk away, remaining motionless until she rounds a corner and leaves you alone in the hallway.

An odd mix of emotions twirls around your mind as you depart the building. Many of them, the vast majority even, are undeniably positive. But voices, ones eerily similar to those found in the fanchants from earlier, echo in the back of your mind and entrench those unshakable feelings of jealousy.

But even as the bus takes you away and you pray to reach home before the rain begins to fall, you know that this inner storm isn't one you can outrun.

tick…

tock…

tick…

tock…

You hope that you’re as good at hiding your emotions as you think you are. Because the way you feel when you’re with Nayeon, your friend, when you’re both excitedly talking a little louder than you should be and occasionally have to pause the conversation to apologize to the other customers nearby, it’s euphoric. It’s exhilarating. It’s everything you could have ever dreamed of and more.

And it could not be more different than the way you feel when you’re with “Nana”, the idol. Because you should still feel that euphoria, that elation. You have no reason not to, especially since Nayeon acts the same way, even going so far as to find time somewhere in her crazy schedule when you two can meet. The joy you find in those moments should be enough. But your jealousy proves gluttonous, leaving you with an awful feeling in the pit of your stomach that grows harder to ignore. It’s inescapable. It’s everything you can’t control threatening to take away everything you hold dear.

And you haven’t the slightest fucking clue what to do.

Unfortunately, the tempest doesn’t give you much time to find a solution before boiling over. It’s only a couple of weeks and a handful of performances later when Nayeon pulls you into a small alcove hidden amongst the towers of sound equipment and piles of wires. Almost immediately, she begins sharing a story about a fan interaction, further fanning the flames of the ugly side of your emotions.

It’s not long before you’re overwhelmed by the turbulent emotions within. Nayeon’s in the middle of a sentence when you lean in, cupping her cheek in one hand as you press your lips against hers. You kiss her gently at first, but after her initial shock, she begins to kiss you back. Firmly. Insistently. You let the sounds of the nearby stage abate, allowing yourself to instead lose yourself in the only senses that matter right now.

Like how the smell of her conditioner reminds you of coconuts and cherry blossoms. Or how she tastes sweeter than honey. Or how her lips are somehow softer than clouds.

You pull away only once oxygen deprivation forces you to, leaving you both staring at each other as you desperately attempt to catch your breath.

“I’m so sorry,” you say as soon as you’re able to. “I shouldn’t have—”

“Don’t you dare apologize,” Nayeon interjects. “Shut up and kiss me again.”

This time, she catches you off-guard as she leans in, pulling your head down slightly as she kisses you with as much intensity as before, if not more. You’re more than willing to match her zeal, eliciting murmurs of satisfaction and small gasps for air from her as you battle back and forth.

It’s intense. It’s electrifying. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted and—

“There you are—oh!”

You and Nayeon hastily separate and turn to face the unexpected spectator, finding none other than poor Wooyeon and her shell-shocked expression awaiting you once again.

“Wooyeon?! I, you, we, uh …” Nana says, trailing off mid-sentence as she steps away from you and attempts the futile task of trying to return her hair to some semblance of normalcy.

“We have to figure out a better way for you to introduce me to your friends,” you tell Nana, earning a stare of disbelief from her and an unexpected bit of melodious laughter from Wooyeon.

“You seriously do!” Wooyeon exclaims, fanning her face in an attempt to disperse the crimson flooding her cheeks. “Honestly, I hate that they keep sending me to find you two, why can't it be Sora getting traumatized for once?”

“Because they know you're way too good at finding things for your own good, especially us apparently,” Nayeon says, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration.

“Oh, don't worry! I won't tell …” Wooyeon trails off for a moment, looking at Nayeon slyly. “Too many people.”

“Hey!” Nayeon exclaims. “Be careful what you wish for, I'm sure plenty of people would be interested in my stories about you.”

“That wasn't what I'd hoped to hear, but you can write me an apology later,” Wooyeon fires back, turning her head away from Nayeon to hide the red that refuses to leave her cheeks. “I hate to do this again, but we really do need to get going.”

Nayeon's indignation seems to flare even further as she steps closer to Wooyeon, but you can't help but chuckle at the image of the shorter Nayeon attempting to intimidate the much taller Wooyeon. Nayeon spares a moment to glare at you before turning back to Wooyeon and saying, “Listen, I'm sure we can—”

“Hey, hey, it’s alright,” you interject. “I’m sure we’ll have time to talk later, right Nayeon?”

“Oh sure, I’m positive that she’ll have plenty of time for a lovely conversation later,” Wooyeon comments, earning a glare from Nayeon that’d likely be scathing if not for the obvious embarrassment coloring her countenance.

“Hey, not so loud!” you jest, smiling just as wide as Wooyeon. “Seriously though, I really am sorry Wooyeon. I’ll make it up to you sometime, hopefully next time I see you. Surely next time we meet it’ll be more normal, right? Surely?”

“Suuurrrelyyyy,” Wooyeon responds, stringing out the single word just long enough to fit every emotion other than sincerity into its delivery. She takes the opportunity to step away from Nayeon, who seems temporarily frozen between states of frustration, embarrassment, and something else entirely.

“Hey, no worries,” you gently tell Nayeon, taking her hands in your own and turning her to face you. “Your members need you.”

“Besides, you should probably go willingly before Wooyeon drags you back, kicking and screaming the whole way,” you joke, smiling as Wooyeon grins and hums in agreement.

“Surely you wouldn't do that to me, right Wooyeon?” Nayeon asks, turning and pouting at her in an exaggeratedly cute manner.

“The option's never been more tempting,” Wooyeon replies, sticking out her tongue in response.

“Okay okay fine, I surrender,” Nayeon tells her, raising her hands in a manner all too familiar to you before turning back to you. “I'll see you Saturday?”

“Wouldn't miss it for anything,” you tell Nayeon, pulling her into a tight hug that finally dispels the vast amount of tension she'd built up in such a short time.

“Neither would I,” Nayeon murmurs back before pulling away just enough to capture your lips one final time.

“Alright, let's go,” Nayeon tells Wooyeon, interlocking arms with her as they begin to walk away.

“So, for the first part of my apology, I want …” Wooyeon's voice trails off as they walk out of earshot. But you remain in place, watching their retreating forms until they leave your field of view. And then perhaps a minute longer, just in case.

But eventually, you also turn away and begin your departure. The only topic on your mind as you walk, ride the bus, and then walk again on your journey to reach your home is the storm of emotions within. On the one hand, it gave you the confidence to act in a way you wouldn't have been willing to normally, leading to an amazing and memorable moment. But on the other hand, you can't shake the feeling that this upswell wasn't the final manifestation of these detrimental feelings. All you can do is hope that if they do flare again, that night won’t be memorable for all the wrong reasons.

tick…

tock…

As you walk alongside Nayeon, you can’t help but marvel at how normal this new norm feels. Even just a few weeks ago, you would have desperately lunged at the chance to see Nayeon a single time, but now, seeing her multiple times a week feels routine. Normal. Unremarkable?

Definitely not unremarkable, as the memory of your arms wrapped around her waist and her lips pressed against your own is just as vivid as it felt in that moment a few nights ago. Even the restlessness of flaking on the group’s performance for the first time last night feels insignificant in comparison to the contentment you feel right now.

Which is why it’s so jarring when you’re met by a “CLOSED” sign on the shop’s door for the first time ever.

“‘Apologies for the sudden closure’,” you read aloud. “‘We’re visiting family this weekend and will be closed for the next couple of days.’”

“‘We’ll be open once again on Monday. We hope to see you then!’” Nana concludes. “I mean, I hope she has a nice time, but what do we do now?”

“I mean, I’m sure we can find somewhere else that sounds good. There are a couple places nearby that I usually order delivery from,” you offer.

“Wait, isn’t your place nearby?” she asks, earning a nod in response. “Why don’t we just pick something up on the way and eat there? We could watch a movie too, it’ll be fun!”

“Wait wait wait,” you say, mind reeling at the implications. “Did you just invite yourself into my apartment?”

“Yep!” Nayeon announces, shame nowhere to be found within that radiant smile. “Now figure out which chicken place you want to order from and let’s go!”

All you can do is laugh at the absurdity of the situation as you pull out your phone and do as she asks. After a few minutes of walking and a quick stop to pick up food, you arrive at your apartment. Your one-bedroom apartment might pale in comparison to some of the more upscale living areas in Seoul, but you genuinely appreciate the place you call your home, and you show it to Nayeon with pride. After a brief tour, you both unpack the large assortment of dishes that usually accompany any Korean meal and begin your dinner.

“How was your performance last night?” you ask her, forcing yourself to smile even as the initial hints of your jealousy begin to stir.

“It went well, thank you!” Nayeon responds, smiling softly at you. “The fan turnout was amazing, so it was super easy to enjoy performing for them. What about you, how was your night?”

“Pretty good, thank you for asking,” you say, attempting to match the warmth of her smile but unable to due to the ice in your heart. “It was a pretty unremarkable evening in general, but I did appreciate the chance to catch up on some much-needed sleep.”

“That’s good to hear! I missed having you there, but I’m glad you were able to rest.”

“Thank you. I’m sorry for not being there to support you, but at least Wooyeon got to enjoy a night where she didn’t have to hunt us down.”

“She actually told me that she was sad you weren’t there! She said on the ride over that she was sure last night was going to be your guys’ first ‘normal’ conversation.”

“Really? That’s unfortunate, hopefully it’ll happen next time I see her.”

“Hopefully!” Nayeon agrees, and you both go back to enjoying your dinner.

A few minutes later, once you’ve both finished and cleared away the table, you pull out your favorite oversized blanket and lounge on the couch, inviting Nayeon to join you. She’s more than happy to oblige, taking the remote from you and immediately pulling up some recently released horror sequel. You can’t help but voice your surprise, but your concerns are swiftly and eagerly shut down as she gets up and begins messing with the light switches, trying different combinations in an attempt to properly set the mood. Once she finally achieves her desired lighting, she hops back onto the couch, pulling the blanket over herself and laying against your side.

As she snuggles in closer, you do your best to relax and simply enjoy the experience. And, if nothing else, the experience is certainly entertaining, as Nayeon seems to be terrified of the jump scares that seem to occur every couple of minutes. Yet despite her screams, she refuses every time you ask if she wants to watch something else, insisting that she’s having a great time. Well, for the first hour at least.

“Can I ask you something?” Nayeon says suddenly as she pauses the movie.

“Of course,” you say, your mind flooding with concerns and thoughts of worst-case outcomes.

“Is everything alright?” she asks, sitting up and turning to face you.

“Like, right now? Couldn’t be better,” you respond, fighting through your concern as you offer a strained smile.

“Mostly just in general, but you don’t seem relaxed even now, despite the fact that we’re under this stupidly soft blanket on this insanely comfy couch,” Nayeon says, smiling for a moment before her expression shifts back to seriousness. “But honestly, you’ve seemed kinda off for a while. It's not all the time, but often enough for me to be concerned. Is there something you want to talk about?”

“No, it’s okay, I—” You stop yourself, searching through the dark and finding nothing but obvious care and trust in her eyes. So, knowing you can do better, you start over.

“I’m not going to lie to you. I promise I won’t. So, yeah, there’s something that’s bothering me, but it’s … hard to explain. I don’t want to hide anything from you—and I promise I will tell you, but I don’t know the words to tell you what I want to say right now. Can I ask you to be patient with me, just for a little bit?”

“Okay,” she says, visible concern on her face as she nods. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Thank you, I really appreciate it,” you say, awkwardly turning back to the TV.

You’re unable to focus on the rest of the movie, deafened by the silence between you two and shivering from a coldness unrelated to the setting sun. Even once it’s over and Nayeon gets ready to leave, neither of you are able to put on a convincing enough performance to hide your emotions. You exchange awkward goodbyes, waving farewell instead of hugging like you’ve always done as she walks away.

Thus, it’s anything but surprising when, mere hours later, the girl of your dreams becomes the subject of your nightmares. Spectral visions of her pained expression haunt you as the thoughts of causing her stress, pain, and suffering bind and isolate you. You swear you can hear the haunted cackling of the manifestations of anxiety and jealousy in your mind as they cast a spotlight on your inability to quell the storm. And as the nightmare begins to fade and you feel yourself being dragged away from her, you finally get it.

As soon as you awaken, unsurprisingly covered in sweat, you immediately grab your phone and begin composing a series of messages. Because you refuse to let your selfishness hurt someone else, especially Nayeon.

You (5:01am): Hey, I’m so, so sorry about last night, especially how it ended

You (5:01am): There’s somewhere I’d love to show you, it’s a private place where we should be able to spend some time together and talk

You (5:01am): If you have an afternoon free sometime soon, please let me know

You (5:02am): Thanks so much

Between the restless night and the anxiety of hoping for a response, the miserable day you end up having is anything but a surprise. You check your phone at every available opportunity, but the response you're hoping for never arrives.

It isn't until after you return home, when you're sitting alone in the stale air of your frigid, empty apartment that Nayeon answers.

Nayeon🐇 (5:01pm): Hey, I'm so sorry for taking so long to respond, there were a lot of things I ended up needing to take care of today

Nayeon🐇 (5:01pm): Does tomorrow work? I'm sorry if it's sooner than you were expecting …

You (5:02pm): No, that would actually be perfect! Thank you so much, I'll send you the address

You press send, feeling a great weight lifted off your shoulders as you confirm the location and time with her. Unfortunately, just as you feel yourself begin to relax, your mind begins compiling a list of the things you’ll need for tomorrow.

So, once again, you bundle up and step outside to face the harsh winds. But this time, as the grocery store comes into view, you're eager to brave the storm. Because you know what's waiting for you on the other side.

tick…

tock…

Noon. The brightest point of the day. A time of warmth. An important part of any day for a multitude of reasons. Specifically, the most important part of today because it's when you plan to meet Nayeon.

You scramble onto the bus just in time, sighing in relief as you check the clock and see that you’re scheduled to arrive a bit early, just as you’d hoped. So, with a bit of free time during the thirty-eight-minute journey awaiting you, you first check all your belongings, happily confirming that nothing's been lost in transit. You look out the window, frowning slightly at the clouds slowly rolling across the sky, blocking out the clear sky you'd hoped would be the backdrop to this crucial day. You cast that aside, choosing instead to focus on what you can control. Like what exactly you want to say to her. How you want to convey your feelings to her.

Is this a confession? A request? An invitation? A farewell? No, you know it's definitely not a farewell. But you still don't know what exactly you want to tell her.

Actually, that's not entirely true either, because when you’re with her, you can't help but want to talk to her about anything and everything. But just for today, you hope that you can be greedy. You hope that you'll somehow find the exact words you need to convey how you feel. The exact words she needs to hear. The exact words that'll help you solve this problem. The exact words she wants to hear. The exact words that'll steal her heart.

A familiar little robotic voice echoes throughout the bus, informing you that you’ve arrived. You gather up your blanket, basket, and jacket, then exit the bus and turn to walk towards your destination.

As you slip your sunglasses on, you look around, smiling slightly at the memories resurfacing at the sight of so many familiar shops from your past. You see the pet store where you cried because your mom wouldn't buy you a chinchilla for your fifth birthday. You see the small ice cream shop where you celebrated your first soccer tournament victory with your friends. You see the hair salon where the stylist always teased you for growing out your hair over your ears as a teenager.

And when you turn the corner, you see the bridge where you had your first kiss. There, standing alone, a familiar flash of gold hides beneath a cap and scarf, and the sight of her finally makes you see the truth. Waiting for you atop that bridge, you see your first love.

“Of course.”

Your knuckles whiten as they tightly grip the wooden handle of the basket. You feel your legs attempt to lock up, but you force yourself to break free of anxiety's cold grip and begin to close the distance. You barely make it onto the small bridge before she perks up at the sound of your footsteps and turns to face you.

“Hey, I'm so sorry for making you wait, I tried to be here as soon as—”

“No, no, don’t worry about it,” Nayeon says, lips upturned in a hint of a smile. “I’m used to being the first one to arrive and I only got here a couple minutes ago.”

You both pause for a moment, an uncharacteristically awkward silence filling the air between you two as you both search for the right thing to say.

“Thanks for inviting me here,” Nayeon says after a few moments. “I've never been to this neighborhood before.”

“No, thank you for being willing to come, especially so soon!” you quickly respond. “I’m sorry for being vague about it earlier, but this is actually where I grew up.”

“Oh really?” Nayeon asks, looking around with a renewed interest. “I'm sure you have so many stories to tell about this place!”

“Something like that,” you say meekly, looking down at the sidewalk. Where you remember standing as you kissed your first crush so many years ago. Where you remember standing as your tears hit the pavement when that same girl said goodbye for the last time. Where you stand now, hoping that you can convince the best thing that's ever happened to you to stay.

“Well then, where are we going?” Nayeon asks. “Don't tell me you're going to ask me to cheat on Aunt Kim by going to another noodle shop!”

“Of course not!” you exclaim, feeling your vigor return as you laugh with her.

“That's probably for the best. I don't suppose it's that ice cream store either?” Nayeon asks excitedly.

“Maybe after,” you say, chuckling at her dramatic pout.

“I did come with a plan for lunch,” you continue, holding up the basket and showing it to her.

“Oh, that's amazing!” Nayeon exclaims, finally closing the distance between you two and hugging you tightly. “You're the cutest!”

You're initially baffled by Nayeon, who's so much shorter than you, calling you cute, but you're more than willing to bite back your response and simply hold her close. After a minute or so, you force yourself to pull away.

“Alright, so where are we going?” Nayeon asks as her eyes eagerly explore the area.

“It's about a fifteen-minute walk from here, maybe twenty if you want me to act as a tour guide.”

“I'm in no rush when I'm with you,” Nayeon immediately responds. “Tell me everything.”

After taking a second to make sure your heart hasn’t overloaded, you extend your hand to her. “Alright, but only because it's you. Follow me.”

Nayeon happily obliges, and with her hand in yours, you begin the journey upstream through the sands of time. You spend the first few minutes of the walk pointing out the local stores and restaurants that you fondly remember, initially avoiding any mention of places associated with less flattering memories. But as you continue on and grow more comfortable, you begin to share all of the most memorable pieces of your past, much to the delight of Nayeon, who's happy to laugh with and at you as you tell her about the defining moments of your childhood.

After roughly ten minutes, you come to a stop, staring up at one tall, gray building in particular amongst the half-dozen duplicates in the area.

“What about this place?” Nayeon asks, noticing your hesitation.

“This is … the place I grew up,” you explain. “My parents and I lived in this apartment building until I graduated high school and went off to college.”

“Oh, so this was your home?”

“You could say that, but I don't think of it that way. This is the place where I lived, but it isn't the place where I made the most memories.”

“Hmm, I think I understand. Did you have a place you'd call your home instead?”

“I did,” you confirm, gripping her hand tighter. “We're going there now.”

You continue on, allowing the air to grow quiet as you walk under the canopy of trees hanging over the path between two streets. After a few minutes of this comfortable contemplation, you speak up.

“I know this is gonna sound weird but hear me out.”

“That's certainly one way to start a conversation,” Nayeon jokes, squeezing your hand slightly. “But sure, I'm listening.”

“I really appreciate how easy it is to just … enjoy being with you,” you explain. “How you make me feel comfortable even when we're being quiet, because just being together is enough.”

“Uh huh. And you wanted to convey this to me by breaking the silence to do so?”

“Listen, I … yeah, I guess so. I just wanted to let you know how you make me feel. I'm far from the best with words, as I'm sure you've noticed.”

“I might have,” she jokes, pulling herself closer against your side. “But I don't think you give yourself enough credit.”

“Oh? Why do you say that?”

“Because I already knew you felt that way,” Nayeon says, looking up at you with bright eyes and a brighter smile. “And because I feel the same way too.”

You share a few more minutes of soft silence as you walk along the road, traveling under the canopy until it parts and you see the clouds above. A couple of streets and turns later, you arrive at your destination.

“This is the park where I used to play soccer,” you explain. “To your right is where I scored a goal to win a tournament match, and if you look wayyy in the back left, you can see where I made an opponent so angry, he shoved me to the ground and nearly broke my wrist.”

“Oh wow!” Nayeon exclaims, covering her mouth as a snippet of laughter threatens to escape. “You must have a lot of fond memories of this place.”

“Yeah …” you say, trailing off as you cast your mind back to those times ten, fifteen years ago. “I made a lot of friends—and enemies—on these fields.”

“Do you still keep in touch with many of them? Your friends, not your enemies,” she clarifies.

“No, almost none of either group actually,” you admit. “It gets hard when people move away and college or work takes over your life. I make sure to stay in contact with one, my best friend from those times, but even that’s a bit of a struggle. I haven’t seen him in who knows how many years, just talked with him online.”

“I—wow…” Nayeon says, eyes sweeping the empty grass that you’ll always remember as full of life. “I can’t even imagine being separated from Wooyeon.”

“Well, it’s probably different when you see each other, what, 350 days out of the year?” you point out.

“That’s fair,” she admits, finally releasing that pent-up chuckle. “Thank you for showing me this, I’m sure it means a lot to you.”

“Of course,” you say, offering her a smile. “Now I want to show you the place that became my home.”

“Then let’s go!” Nayeon announces, returning your smile and allowing you to lead her across the expanse that seemed endless when you were younger.

Eventually, you reach a small chain link fence, which you follow until you’re met with the familiar sight of a rusted gate with a faded combination lock.

“Let’s hope they haven’t changed this,” you say, mostly to yourself, as you input the code: 090301.

To your great joy—and mild surprise—it unlatches, allowing you to open the gate and lead Nayeon inside. Within, you easily navigate through the branches and brush, memories coming back in a rush as you delve deeper and deeper. After about a minute, you arrive, pulling back a branch and allowing Nayeon to pass by you into the small clearing. Surrounded on all sides by trees, a pair of smooth, plateau-like rocks sit a couple meters from a softly flowing creek, granting you both the solitude that this private sanctum had always blessed you with.

“This is it,” you explain, nearly whispering the words as Nayeon takes in the scene. “This was … everything, really. This is where I came when I needed to think, needed to decompress, or … needed to know what I needed, I guess.”

“This is incredible!” Nayeon says, eyes wide as she frenetically scours every centimeter of the area, committing it to memory. “How did you even find this place?”

“Everyone I’ve ever brought here has asked me that exact question,” you say, a sentimental smile spreading across your face. “But I’ll tell you the same thing I told the other two; I feel like it honestly found me. I just … went out looking for a sign of something on a night where I needed direction and found myself here.”

“This is actually the first time I’ve come here since moving away for college,” you continue. “It’s crazy how as much as things change, they stay the same.”

“I guess so …” Nayeon says, trailing off before turning and meeting your eyes. “Thank you for bringing me here. I can tell this place holds a special place in your heart and I deeply appreciate you sharing it with me.”

“Of course,” you say after a moment, struggling to formulate words under the intensity of her gaze. “You hold a special place in my heart too, so I appreciate you trusting me and coming here with me.”

Nayeon is content to let her smile be her response, so you lay out the blanket across the smooth rocks and take a seat on one, gesturing towards the other. “Come on, let’s talk.”

“Talk?” she asks, implication obvious in her voice as her eyes harden.

“Talk,” you confirm with a nod.

“Okay,” Nayeon whispers, barely loud enough for you to hear above your pounding heartbeat as she takes a seat beside you. She shakes her hands like they’ve gone numb, then continues, “Please, tell me what’s going on. Everything that’s going on.”

“Nayeon, I want to make sure you know something, something very important,” you tell her, earning a nod in response. “I care about you. So much. Maybe too much. I know I haven’t been returning the warmth that you’ve shared with me, and for that, I am so sorry.”

You pause, release the breath you didn’t realize you were holding, and deeply inhale before continuing, “It’s just—sometimes when I’m with you, negative emotions start building up inside me that feel like a storm threatening to pull me under. Sometimes, I can’t help but feel jealous when I see you on stage or when you talk about your fans, because it feels like there’s so many of them and I’m just … me. I feel like they’ve known you longer, seen more of you, and that you can’t help but prioritize them because your job depends on it. I know I shouldn’t feel this way, and I know that it’s selfish.”

You force yourself to stop and look at her. She sits patiently, listening attentively as she nods once again, waiting for you to continue. So, you do. “I want you to know, more than anything else, that none of this is your fault. And I am so, so sorry for putting you in this position. But after you asked me if everything was alright, I knew that I couldn’t hide it from you any longer. I knew that if I kept this inside, it would boil over and end up hurting you in the process. And I can’t allow that to happen—I can’t let you get hurt because of how I feel—but I can’t walk away without telling you the truth. And I know I have no right to do this to you and I understand if you’re upset and if you want me to leave I—”

“Hey, hey, listen to me,” Nayeon says softly, cupping your face in her ever so delicate hands. “Thank you, so much, for telling me this. I don’t and won’t ever blame you for feeling those kinds of feelings. I wish I could tell you that I understand and that everything will be alright, but I can't. Honestly, I probably won’t ever truly be able to.”

“But I need you to trust me when I tell you that you mean everything to me,” she continues. “And I need you to trust me when I tell you I’m willing to face this problem as long as it’s by your side. And when I say that we can get through this, together, I mean it with every fiber of my being and all of my heart. All I can ask is that you put your faith in me, in yourself, and most importantly, in us. Can you do that for me?”

“Just like that?” you ask, dumbfounded. “I’m being completely unfair, presenting you with this problem, and you’re somehow still willing to give me more support?”

“For you? Absolutely,” she responds resolutely. “I don’t know if I’d ever be able to piece my heart back together if you broke it by leaving.”

“Then yes, I—Yes,” you declare, placing your hands on hers and holding them tightly. “Absolutely, I can. I will. I promise.”

She beams with joy, immediately responding, “Anything for me, right?”

You gently pull her hands away from your face, interweaving your fingers with hers as you tell her, “Of course Nana, it’s always been you. You’ve been the only thing that matters to me since the moment I saw you. It’s always been you and always will be.”

You watch as her eyes go wide. “You’ve never called me that before.”

“I guess so …” you say, trailing off as the realization hits you too. “I’m sorry if you’d—“

You stop yourself as Nana untangles her fingers from yours in an instant, wrapping her arms around you and squeezing you so tightly that it’s nearly impossible to continue.

“Please say something,” you manage to get out, chuckling awkwardly. “I kinda just poured my heart and soul out to you and I’d really appreciate you sharing your thoughts.”

“My arms are getting tired from how tightly I’m hugging you and you still need me to tell you what I’m thinking?” Nana scoffs, nuzzling into your chest and refusing to let go.

“Fair point,” you admit, contentedly wrapping your arms around her, though nowhere near as tightly as she’s hugging you. “Thank you, Nana.”

“For what? The hug?” she asks, somehow squeezing you even tighter.

“I mean, yes, the hug is amazing, but that isn’t what I meant,” you choke out. “For being so good to me. From that first day we met all the way until today, I feel like I’ve been the one with the problem and you’ve been the one with the solution.”

“Maybe, but that won’t always be the case,” Nana responds, loosening her hold on you just enough to allow you to breathe again. “And if a storm comes and attempts to drag me under, I like to believe you’ll be there, holding on for dear life and refusing to let go.”

You don’t even try to respond verbally, instead releasing your hold on her and using your newly free hand to cup her chin. As your thumb slowly traces patterns across the soft skin of her cheek, the rest of your body closes what little distance remains between you, allowing you to brush the faintest of kisses onto her lips. You kiss her gently, tenderly, barely making any contact as your lips land on hers and then depart before she can kiss you back. You repeat these featherlight flits over and over again, attempting to convey all the feelings you’ve left unsaid. And finally, when she tightens her hold on you and mewls in frustration, you fervently capture her lips and refuse to be the one who pulls away.

Your conviction ends up just barely lasting long enough for Nana to pull away first, but the light-headedness and dizziness that blocks your view of the only thing you want to be seeing right now is a powerful reminder that oxygen is, in fact, important. For a short while, the sound of both of you panting is the only sensation that keeps you tethered to consciousness. But eventually, when you manage to part the darkness and open your eyes, you’re met with the sight of Nana, her chest expanding and contracting just as rapidly as yours as you both amend your oxygen deficits. And if her smudged lipstick, flushed face, and wild, wide eyes staring into yours are any indication, you’re fairly confident she’s satisfied with your response.

“So … lunch?”

“Just like that?” she asks, dumbfounded. “You literally take my breath away and that’s all you have to say?”

“Oh, I did have something else!” you remark, acting far more nonchalantly than you feel. “I love you, Nana.”

It can’t be instantaneous. But you don’t quite know how it happens either. Your heart skips a beat when you see a blur of motion in your periphery, then you blink and you’re on the ground with Nana holding you down. Somewhere around the second or third second of Nana kissing you, it finally connects in your mind. She actually just tackled you off the rock.

“I—love—you—too,” Nana tells you, whispering each word into your ear in the moments between her own featherlight kisses. Your heart soars at her reciprocation of your feelings, and as soon as she decides the time for words is over, you’re more than happy to oblige. She melts into you as you wrap your arms around her back and return her kiss, matching her fervor and maybe even exceeding it. You both know to pull away much sooner than you did last time, respecting the harsh lesson your bodies had given you.

“You know, a little warning would be nice,” you tease, smiling up at her.

“You’re one to talk!” Nana exclaims, hitting your chest with one small hand as she fans her crimson visage with the other. “Don’t you know that it’s downright irresponsible to just drop something on me like that?”

“To be fair, I was under the impression that we both expected you to be the responsible one here,” you say, bringing out your puppy eyes and painting faux innocence across every centimeter of your face.

“I … you … ugh!” she grumbles, a rainbow of emotions flashing across her face before she finally leans away from you. “Yes dear, lunch sounds wonderful.”

It’s right then when you realize another thing that makes Nana special. She makes your cheeks hurt with how much you smile around her. And even minutes later, after you’ve both gotten up, unpacked the basket, and you’ve both begun to eat the home cooked meals out of the little plastic containers they’re stored in, the smile she so easily coaxes out of you hasn’t left your face.

“I didn’t get to say it earlier after you blindsided me, but thank you too,” Nana says midway through your meal.

“Blindsided is a bit rich coming from you, the only person here who literally tackled the other, but I digress,” you respond, smiling warmly at her amused smirk. “What for?”

“For being my friend,” she says, turning away from you and staring into the woods. “It’s … hard to make friends as an idol. There are so many expectations for how we’re meant to behave and we’re often too busy to really spend time with others. I really appreciate your willingness to be flexible and even come to our performances, especially now that I know how it was affecting you …”

“Of course, I’m always happy to be flexible, it’s for you,” you tell her, taking her hand in yours. “Even if you’re only able to spare a few minutes after each performance, I’m sure we could make it work.”

“But it doesn’t have to only be then, that’s not fair to either of us,” she says, squeezing your hand back. “Days like this are worth clearing my schedule for.”

“Wait, you cleared your schedule for today? To see me? Yesterday? Before you even knew if I was available?” you ask, receiving a quartet of nods in response.

“That’s why I took so long to respond yesterday, I was running around taking care of all my responsibilities in the dorm and doing the choreography practice I’d planned to do today,” Nana explains. “I trusted that you’d make it work. When I saw your text that early in the morning, I figured that you hadn’t been able to sleep either.”

“Wow … I … didn’t even realize … thank you for doing so much for me,” you say, idly tracing circles against the back of her hand. “But truly, I am always happy to see you, regardless of time or circumstance. I’m really looking forward to seeing you perform in the future; it’ll be nice to be able to really enjoy you doing what you love without jealousy blinding me.”

“That’s great to hear!” she responds, turning back and smiling at you. “You taking the time to come see us means so much to me … the first thing I do whenever I get on stage is find you in the crowd.”

“Oh, I—oh. Thank you,” you say, grateful that you manage to reply before those words join the rest in vacating your mind.

“Of course!” Nana responds, smiling warmly at you before you both return to your lunch. After you both finish your meals, you look up to the sky, grimacing as you see the consolidation of the clouds as they blot out the sun.

“Hey, Nana,” you say, pointing up to the sky as she turns to you. “We should definitely get going before we end up stuck in the rain.”

“Okay,” she says, nodding resolutely. “Let’s get packed up and go.”

You both work together in harmony, loading the containers back into the basket in a fraction of the time it took to unload them. You take her hand once more, hastily leading her along the trails and roads you've traversed alone countless times.

“We might have to skip the ice cream today,” you tell Nana as you both quickly walk down the streets that house so many memories.

“Oh no! I guess you'll just have to make it up to me later …” Nana responds, smiling in understanding.

A minute or so later, just as the first few drops of rain begin to fall like your tears that night on the bridge, you arrive at the bus stop.

“This is where I need to get on the bus,” you say to Nana. “Where are you going, can I call you a taxi? Were you intending on someone picking you up? What's the plan?”

Nana smiles in a very particular way, the same way she always seems to smile whenever she realizes that she knows something you don't. “I'm going wherever you're going. That's been my plan for a long, long time now.”

You're grateful for the rain, as the sounds of its fall are the only sounds to be found in the seconds that pass before you're able to respond. You wrap your jacket around her shoulders, sheltering her from the cold as you stare directly into her eyes and tell her, “I … I don't know what I did to deserve the trust you put in me, but I'm incredibly grateful for it. I promise you that I will never take it for granted. I promise you, with every fiber of my being and all of my heart, that I will never break that trust.”

“I know,” Nana responds, her whispered words bouncing between the raindrops before barely reaching your ears. “You showed me your heart today, the least I can do is give you mine.”

You pull Nana close and gently rest your forehead against hers. Each falling raindrop and each flowing teardrop helps you paint the picture, telling her the thousands of words you can’t verbalize but need her to know. In this shared moment, as echoes of your past remind you of those sorrowful tears shed so many years ago, your joyful ones return you to the present and the gift in your arms. So, at least in this moment, you hold Nana tight, vowing to never let her go.

You pull away only when the bus arrives a few minutes later but remain hand in hand as you walk forward. After stepping on, paying for both of your fares, and finding a pair of seats, you pull out a pair of earbuds and offer Nana one. She's more than happy to accept, and as she rests her head on your shoulder and you queue up a series of serene love songs from your favorite artists, you hope their words can do a better job of telling Nana how much you love her.

tick…

tock…

“We're here,” you whisper to Nana, gently shaking her awake. “Just take my hand, I'll lead you home.”

“Okay,” she murmurs, interweaving her fingers with yours and following you through the bus, down the steps, and into the monsoon that immediately jolts her back into consciousness.

“Oookaaayyyy, I'm up!” Nana declares, pulling your jacket tight against her small frame. “Lead the way, I don't think these pants are gonna do much against a storm like this!”

You take off immediately, leading her as quickly as you can down the sidewalks before eventually stopping at an interaction where you ask her, “But really, why does it always seem like your outfits are in no way at all suited to the weather?”

“Because my outfit looks cute!” Nana exclaims indignantly. “And you of all people should be glad that’s my priority!”

“Of course, you're right,” you respond, kissing her on the nose in apology. “Then again, I'm convinced you'd make anything look good, but I do genuinely appreciate that you care and that you put thought into your outfits. It makes me feel special.”

The crosswalk finally flashes green, and you take off once again, leading Nana towards your apartment as she scolds you. “Seriously, you can't just keep saying things like that so casually! There are at least four heartwarming things in that statement that make me want to kiss you, but your question was so stupid that I still kinda want to slap you! And this stupid rain isn’t helping anything at all! And I’m cold! Ugh!”

You're grateful that you're ahead of Nana, because you know that if she sees the goofy smile on your face, you'll be in big trouble. “Okay dear, I'm sorry I made you feel that way,” you respond, speaking in the most soothing tone possible. “We’re almost to my apartment, where it’ll be n-nice and warm, and w-we’ll make everything better. I p-promise.”

Neither of you speak another word for the remainder of your mad dash, too busy fighting off the shivers to do so. After a few more minutes, you arrive back at your home, where you tear the key from your pocket, hurriedly unlock the door, and shepherd her inside.

“O-Okay, I’m g-going to start the sh-shower f-for you and g-grab a dry set of clothes for y-you to change into, please f-feel free to d-discard that j-jacket l-literally anywhere,” you manage to tell Nana, taking off as she begins to do as you request.

You fight off the shivers as you quickly dash around your apartment, flipping the shower on and grabbing yourself a towel before darting into your bedroom and grabbing some dry clothes for both of you, then returning to Nana.

“Okay, t-the shower should b-b-be nice and h-hot, and there’s a c-clean towel in t-t-there y-you can u-use,” you stammer as you round the corner. “H-Here’s something t-to … change … into …”

Your voice escapes you as you see her, back turned as she watches the rain mercilessly paint the cobblestone. You first see the soaked cotton of her top and how it shakes as her small figure shivers in the cold. But that isn’t what catches your eye and leaves you dizzy. It’s the way her pants have tightened, showcasing the sculpted definition of her thighs and how they flow upwards to display the perfectly round curve of her ass.

As she turns, you force yourself to pull your gaze upwards, feeling your face flush as your pulse continues to quicken. You drag your eyes up her body, past her toned stomach that hides beneath the sopping garments, past her pert breasts and stiff nipples that strain against the soaked fabric, past her shaking shoulders and kissable neck and diamond jawline and roseate lips and adorable nose until finally you meet those chocolate eyes that stare back at you.

“T-Thank you s-s-soooo m-much,” Nana responds, fighting off her own shivers as she takes the clothes from you, then darts off towards the warmth awaiting her, leaving you frozen in more ways than one.

You do your best to ignore how difficult it is to remove your soaked pants, especially as they cling to your skin and especially because of your hardening erection that’s impossible to miss. After removing all of your drenched attire and placing the dripping bundle alongside the jacket you loaned Nana, you attempt to dry yourself off, saturating the towel with frigid water far quicker than you’d hoped you would. Once you’re sure that you’ve gotten your money’s worth, you add the towel to the pile in the sink, then put on the pajamas you’d grabbed and turn up the thermostat to its highest setting.

Once you're confident that you’ve done all you can, you collapse, couch creaking in protest at the impact. In this moment to breathe, the events of the day begin to hit you, flashing across your mind in sync with the droplets of rain against your window. You think of all the places that defined your childhood. You think of faces long forgotten. You think of faces you’ll never forget. You think of echoes. You think of her atop that bridge. You think of her atop that bridge. You think of all the words that escaped your lips. You think of Nana’s small hands lifting the weight of the world off your shoulders. You think of her body on top of yours as she pinned you down with kisses. You think of her body. You think of the cold. You think of heat. You think of your soaked clothes clinging to your skin. You think of Nana’s soaked clothes clinging to her skin. You think of Nana, dripping wet. You think of Nana, dripping wet.

As you stare out the window, your mind vaguely registers the sound of a hair dryer. But soon even that sense joins the others, consumed with the thoughts of Nana. One storm for another. You’re not even sure if the words escape your lips.

The door opens, and you get up to face Nana. She’s radiant, each strand of gold and each centimeter of porcelain glowing in the dim light of your apartment. She’s wearing glasses. She’s wearing your favorite shirt. She’s wearing nothing else.

“Hey,” she whispers, somehow slotting seventy emotions into that single syllable as it floats over to you.

You've always viewed Nana as pretty. She's always been cute. She'll never not be beautiful. But as you fight off the arctic chill that permeates your bones, you realize you've never looked at her this way. You can't help but notice how hot she is. You see Nana as sexy for the first time.

“Hey,” she calls again, tilting her head and leaning to the side. It’s unfair, the way she sinks against the doorframe. It’s immoral, the way she makes herself look even smaller as she hides in the folds of your shirt. It’s incomprehensible, the way the wide rims of her glasses make her pleading eyes look even bigger. It’s criminal, the way she hides her intent behind that innocent smile.

“Are you just gonna sit there with your jaw on the floor for the rest of the night, or are you going to say something?”

“N-Nana, if you could s-see what I see, y-you’d be speechless t-too,” you manage to get out, unable to suppress the shivers as you respond.

“Well, you could walk into the bathroom that I might have sorta turned into a sauna,” Nana offers, the smallest of smiles beginning to show.

“Or …” she continues, taking her time as she closes the distance between you two. “I could warm you up …”

Your arms wrap around her instinctually as she presses her body against you. You can feel the sculpted frame hidden beneath the oversized shirt. You can feel the tension. You can feel the heat. And as your eyes drift down to her lips, you can feel your reservations flying out the window to join the falling rain.

You kiss her. Gently. Delicately. And she shoves you backwards onto the couch.

“Absolutely not,” Nana declares, climbing into your lap. She wraps her arms around your neck, licking her lips hungrily before pulling you close. Within a second of her claiming your lips with her own and beginning to grind against your lower half, any questions you might have had join your reservations on the pavement outside. You match her intensity, running your tongue along her lips patiently, then expectantly, and claim her mouth as soon as she lets you in. Your hands roam, dragging your fingers like ice cubes across her hips and down her thighs as she hisses into your mouth.

You work your way up her body, past her waistline and under your her shirt. You travel further, past the lean abs she’s worked so hard to sculpt, across the ridges and valleys of her expanding and contracting rib cage, all the way until the tips of your fingers brush the sensitive underside of her breasts. The whimper that escapes her mouth into yours is immediate. It’s needy. It’s pathetic. It’s the hottest sound you’ve ever heard.

The soft, malleable skin becomes a pair of perfect handfuls as you explore the fringes of Nana’s breasts, sending sparks through her synapses and shockwaves down her spine. You break away from her kiss, just for a moment, just long enough to watch her collapse onto you as you finally knead her swollen nipples between your fingers. You take the opportunity to access the curve of her neck, mentally noting where earns the loudest moans as you suck, kiss, and nip the sensitive skin.

“Look at you, so desperate,” you whisper into her ear, grinding your hips against hers and forcing her to moan. “I’ve barely even touched you, but somehow you’re even more drenched than earlier.”

“And you know what’s the worst part?” you murmur, stretching a single second across the tension before continuing. “That’s nothing compared to what you’re doing to me. I’ve never been so hard in my fucking life.”

“You—you’re—OH!!!”

You know what you’re doing when you latch onto that particular spot on the base of her neck; that her response is going to be lost, lost in the sound of her moan echoing against your walls. But you also know what she wanted to verbalize, what her body has been telling you as it tenses up even further. So, when you feel her shaking, on the precipice, you’re more than willing to lend a hand. You’re happy to detach from her breast, brushing against her sensitive folds with the back of your hand. And so, when you’re kind enough to simply graze her clit with an icy fingernail, you also make sure to hold her as she comes undone.

The first orgasm you give Nana is a cinematic experience, with a soundtrack of the most ungodly of moans alongside her quivering limbs and the deathly grip on your shoulders as if you’re the only thing keeping her afloat. You gently trace circles along her back, whispering sweet nothings into her ear and holding her as she rides out the high. You wait, long after the quivering has ceased and she’s unclenched her hands, long enough for her to meet your eyes and show you that the fog has lifted.

“Hey,” you murmur, goofy grin growing wider as you see her eyes flash with outrage.

“You can’t keep doing this!” Nana exclaims, huffing in frustration when all you have to offer is your gleaming smile. “You can’t just blow my mind and change my life and end it with a ‘Hey’!”

“Who said that was the end?” you ask, humor discarded as your tone drops. “You did what you said you would, now we’re both hot and bothered.” You look into her eyes, see the recognition and excitement. Then, you see the desire reignite as you thrust upwards, teasing her sex with only a bit of friction. “What are you going to do about it?”

Nana meets the challenge with equal passion, whispering into your ear, “I’m going to show you a side of me that no one has ever seen before.”

Having adequately spiked your blood pressure, Nana climbs off you, moving with idol-like grace as she sashays towards your bedroom door. Having reached the end of the runway, she turns, throwing off her shirt and modeling her pristine form for you. She’s divine. You somehow tear your eyes away from her flawless figure, staring instead into her molten eyes. She captures her bottom lip between her teeth, slowly dragging them across the soft, pink skin before twisting her innocuous expression into one of sinister glee. She’s sin incarnate.

Then, she’s gone, retreated back into your bedroom. You’re off the couch in a blur, flinging off your shirt and pajama bottoms, discarding the soaked pieces of clothing as they join the rest. You round the corner, entering your bedroom, and you have to pinch yourself to make sure you aren’t dreaming.

You’ve seen Nana dozens of times at this point, seen her in outfits ranging from luxury goods to school uniforms to casual attire to athletic wear. You’ve seen her when doted on by professional stylists, just after a dance practice, and everywhere in-between. But when you see her here, in your bed, wearing nothing but a smile and absolutely glistening in anticipation, you swear your heart stops.

You climb onto the bed; you climb on top of her. You kiss her. Not lightly, not lustfully, but lovingly. And when she kisses you back, you feel that exact same longing. Despite the sincerity in the kiss, you don’t feel the heat in the room diminish at all. No, you just realize it’s everburning.

You pull away. Barely. Just enough room for words. Just far enough to see her eyes.

“No interruptions this time, it's just you and me,” you murmur, causing her to shudder in anticipation right up until a thunderclap echoes throughout the apartment and makes you both jump.

“We really need to work on our timing, don’t we?” Nana jokes, harmonious laughter escaping her as you see her anticipation, affection, and arousal merge, forming the euphoric expression she wears earnestly.

“Yeah, so maybe one interruption,” you say, laughing along with her until her mess of giggles comes to an end.

“But you are mine, Nana,” you whisper, your hot breath inflaming her senses as each syllable reaches her ears. “I am yours, and tonight belongs to no one else. Just us. Tonight is ours.”

“Perfect,” she whispers back, that single word a lit match she drops directly into your heart. “What now?”

“Show me,” you say, rolling you both and flipping your positions so she’s atop you. You give her control. Earnestly. You give her your trust. Easily. You give her your all. You give her everything.

When she takes your length in her hand, giving you your first hints of pleasure, you groan in relief. When she lines you up with her entrance and drips arousal onto your tip, you inhale through your teeth, hissing as if you’d been burned. And when she lowers herself onto you and takes you inside her, it literally takes your breath away.

“Fuuuck…” Nana hisses, sending your heart rate into the stratosphere. “It feels … so … fucking … amazing …”

“You’re incredible Nana,” you growl through gritted teeth, hands latching onto her hips and gripping tighter than you probably should. But any expectation of you being perfectly in control of yourself is entirely unreasonable when she’s moving like this, taking you deeper and deeper into her warmth at an agonizingly slow pace. You can’t help it; her face, her body, the way she quivers - you can’t tear your eyes away, not when you see the beads of sweat splattered across her furrowed brow. Not when you can practically hear the grinding of her tensed jaw. And certainly not when her closed eyelids hide those rich chocolate eyes.

“Take your time,” you whisper soothingly. “No need to rush, I’ll stay here forever as long as it’s with you.” You see some of the tension evaporate from her shoulders, but that does nothing for the vice grip she still has around your cock. Her progress accelerates slightly, taking on more and more of you with each passing moment before finally, finally your hips collide.

“There we go,” Nana mumbles, reopening her eyes and regaining a bit of that hubris you’ve come to know and … like. Having finally reached her destination, you can see the gears turning in Nana’s head as she starts to experiment, rolling her hips against yours and exploring all the possible sensations she can experience. One particular angle catches you off guard, causes you to moan even louder than before. You see it in her eyes, see how they immediately ignite. She repeats the motion, ripping another of those moans from deep within your chest as you see that gleefully sinister smile return.

The image of Nana bouncing up and down on your cock is obscene yet puts all other art to shame with its beauty. You simultaneously appreciate and despise her dancing background as she moves with unyielding precision. She places her hands on your shoulders as she continues exploring, utilizing her flexibility and strength to adjust her position and flex her muscles in ways you’d never thought possible, much less experienced.

“Oh my god Nana …” Your words trail off, lost to the pleasures of her latest findings, but they fan the flames all the same.

“Tell me how good that feels,” Nana purrs, punctuating her point by sliding herself back down onto the base of your cock. Then again. And again. And again.

“It feels so—FUCK!—ing good,” you manage to choke out, throwing your head back in pleasure. Almost instantly, Nana grabs you by the chin, pulling you forward and making it impossible to look anywhere else.

“Don’t you dare look anywhere else,” she growls, sending a new sensation down your spine as her ceaseless riding continues to chip away at your sanity. “Tell me how I make you feel.”

“You—ugh!” Words escape you, your mind unable to comprehend things other than pleasure and pain and Nana. Your grip tightens, tight enough to bruise, as you desperately try to cling to something, anything. “You feel amazing.”

“What else?” Nana asks, picking up the pace.

“You drive me insane,” you tell her, sparing her hips further punishment as you focus on her breasts once again.

“Tell me more,” she demands, riding you even faster.

“You’re unbelievable!” you yell, mustering what little oxygen remains as you match her volume.

“More.” Even faster.

“You’re perfect,” you say, voice dropping as her pitch rises.

“More!” Faster.

“I love how you make me feel.” Even quieter.

“More, more!!” she demands greedily, hips bouncing at a delirious pace as her face tenses once more.

“I love you Nana,” you whisper sweetly. But you refuse to let the sentiment disrupt the moment, following her hips up as you thrust into her and throw off her rhythm. “Cum for me.”

“FUCK—”

Nana somehow manages the impossible, staring through you with misty eyes as she succumbs to pleasure, drenching your lower half and the sheets below in her nectar as her orgasm violently overtakes her. It takes everything you have to remain motionless, cock painfully throbbing as you try not to overwhelm her. Each of you experiences the seconds as if they were lifetimes, you on the verge of pleasure and her well over the edge of it.

“You didn’t cum?” Nana asks, shifting slightly in your lap and forcing you to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from exploding inside her right then. She raises herself off of you, maintaining eye contact the entire time she moves away and positions herself between your legs. As she leans forward, opening her mouth and letting her warm breaths torment your torturously erect shaft further, she has the audacity to wink at you.

“Time to change that.”

The sight of her fucking tongue teasing the sensitive skin of your cock all the way from base to head is ungodly, and you know immediately, no camera flash required, that this image will be burned into your mind for all eternity. It’s almost demeaning how casually she destroys you, idly wrapping her fingers around your shaft as her tongue begins to swirl around the head of your cock. “Fucking hell Nana …”

If your words affect her, she’s doing a damned good job hiding it, drooling unapologetically all over the fingers that twist and pump your shaft, priming it as her mouth continues to work its way further and further down. And all the while, the entire time she molds you to her desires like putty in her hands, she holds your eyes. Lovingly. Expectantly. Enticingly.

“I’m close …” You try to warn her, but her hum in response sends an all-new type of shock all the way down your shaft, cutting off any further waste of oxygen. Your hands tangle into your sheets, threatening to shred them in your grip as you fight to keep the desire to let loose and absolutely defile her throat. “I’m gonna—”

Nana ignores your words, listening to the signs of your body as she delicately unwraps her small hand from around your shaft. The faintest flicker of disappointment flashes in the back of your mind, but it’s immediately eradicated as Nana forces herself downwards, catching you completely off-guard as she takes you into her throat, consuming you entirely.

“NANA!!” She rips her name out from deep within you, sending you soaring over the edge of orgasm as you are unmade by pleasure. Your body tenses and contracts, overwhelming pleasure pulsating from head to toe and every centimeter in between. Wave after wave after wave after wave of your cum fires into her mouth, but you’re unable to bear witness as your eyelids shield you from the unholy sight. It’s so much, so fast, that it drives you to the perfect intersection of pain and pleasure, leaving you unable to do anything but feel.

Eventually, your orgasm comes to an end, as all things must. The first thing you do is open your eyes to see Nana, mouth still snugly around your cock as she swallows the last of drops of your deluge. The second thing you do is remember to breathe. You watch as she detaches herself from your cock, then joins you, for the second time today, in an agonizing minute of shaking shoulders and heaving chests as you both attempt to force enough oxygen into your lungs to be able to speak. Fortunately, you’re both able to. You just happen to do so first.

“So … dinner? Or are you good … after …”

“I’m actually going to murder you,” she mutters, and you don’t even try to stop the laughter that forces its way out.

“You know, I was going to be upset at you for the whole ‘not maintaining eye contact’ thing,” Nana says with a smile of her own, climbing up the bed to lay against your side. “But considering I’m the one that made you nearly black out, I’ll give you a pass this time.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” you offer, smiling sheepishly as you wrap an arm around her. “But you were—”

“Yeah, uh …” she interjects, trailing off as her rapid pulse quickly delivers a crimson flush to her cheeks. “I don’t know … it was just really nice—and really hot—to hear you say those things about me.”

“Any time,” you say as you lean in, gently kissing her on the crown of her head. “By the way, did you … I didn’t really see …”

“Oh, this?” Nana asks, opening her mouth wide to show you the tongue and walls, unbesmirched by white. “I’m sure you agree that was pretty hot, but I guess that means you don’t wanna—”

You roll over slightly, propping yourself up on your elbows as you climb over her once more, leaning down and cutting her sentence short as you capture her lips. A small squeak of surprise escapes before she matches your passion, wrapping her arms around your neck as your tongues begin to dance. As the intensity rises your heartbeat follows suit, sending blood all throughout your body and especially one place in particular.

“Not done, huh?” Nana murmurs, capturing your bottom lip between her teeth and gently sucking on it as she looks at you with her seductress’ gaze.

“For you? Never,” you murmur back, intent and invitation clear in your eyes.

“We’ll have to test that sometime …” Nana responds, mirth and mischief manifesting in her smile as she releases your lip. “For now though … show me.”

The kiss you leave on her lips is fleeting, acting more as a palate cleanser than any declaration or escalation. You grab a pillow with one hand, lifting Nana up with the other and placing it under the small of her back as you set the stage. With a bit of additional leverage gained and anticipation built, you line yourself up with her entrance, looking to Nana who nods in confirmation as you enter her once again.

You push further into her slowly, eager to reach the previous round’s intensity but mindful of her pleasure as her tightness suffocates your shaft. Ravenous for more, you lean in, greeted by the mixed scents of coconuts and cherry blossoms and sweat and everything else about her that makes your head spin. You’re quick to attack her neck again, latching onto one of the many spots you noted earlier and sucking relentlessly.

“Wait wait wait, no marks!” Nana exclaims, placing her hands on your shoulders and pushing you away from your target.

“I’m so sorry, I should have—” Your apology grinds to a halt as Nana, sinful gaze meeting your own, delicately lays a single finger against your lips.

“No … visible marks,” she clarifies, smirking seductively as she lowers her arms and offers you free reign once more.

You’re more than happy to seize the opportunity, capturing one of her nipples between your teeth and beginning your oral assault as you suck, swirl, and tease her with your tongue. One hand begins exploring her body, creating only the tiniest bit of contact as it glides over each area of her flawless skin, searching for unexpected pleasure points anywhere you can reach.

“Be vocal,” you murmur, breath rolling like fog over her breast. “I want nothing more than to know every single spot on your body that drives you wild.”

You see out of the corner of your eyes Nana opening her mouth, as if to respond, but as your hips collide once more and you fully bury your length inside of her, a deep, heady moan bulldozes through her best laid plans and tears free instead. As you begin to thrust faster, deeper, you sink your other hand below her waistline, searching only a moment before finding the sensitive bud of her clit and adding it to your list of ministrations.

“Tell me Nana, tell me what feels good,” you say, soothing voice a stark contrast to the frenetic pace at which you chase her pleasure.

“Your fucking mouth, I love how you suck on my—ugh!” Another day, you’d feel cruel for cutting her off so rudely, but honestly, who could blame you for doing what she asks? “And the way you feel inside me, thrusting in so deep …” This time, it’s a sharp intake of air, but you’re happy to earn another moan as you thrust deep inside her again. Then again, for good measure. One more time. “And I love the way you … with your hand … on my thigh … yesssss …” You’ll have to make a special note for that one, apparently figure eights are the best pattern to trace along the inside of her thighs. Who knew?

You get lost in the perfection that is Nana, thrusting wildly as you ride the high all the way up to the summit. You mar her flawless skin with marks of desire, leave little reminders of pleasure where no one else will see them. You feast on her skin, attempting to satiate a hunger you both know will never be sated. Your hands roam as well, acting with a mind of their own as one roams every uncharted inch of her skin while the other stays glued between her thighs, toying mercilessly with her most sensitive area. It’s plenty for you to keep track of, but if Nana’s reactions are anything to go by, it’s bordering on too much for her to handle.

Time’s a relative thing in general, but here, in the bedroom with Nana, there’s no eternity better spent. You chase your pleasures together, call and response, back and forth, her and you, united as one. You cherish the opportunity to care for Nana for once, bringing her pleasure in as many ways as possible. “Fuck!” You seek those profanities. “Oh god—” You crave those indecencies. “You’re gonna make me …” You hunt her peaks, and as she thrashes, shakes, quivers, and cries in your arms, you’re there to hold her the whole way down.

“Nana, I’m getting close,” you tell her, growing delirious as pleasure begins to overwhelm you. “Where—”

“I swear to god if you cum anywhere other than inside of me …” Nana threatens, though her glassy eyes and lolled tongue diminish the impact a bit.

You feel Nana’s legs wrap around your waist, pulling you in as her arms do the same. Her lips claim yours, capturing any senses that weren’t already completely overwhelmed by her and her alone. As you lean into her, tongues dancing as your body disconnects from your mind, pleasure shoots through your veins like a shot or seventy of adrenaline. If you were any more coherent, you might’ve been able to enjoy the details, like the way your cock’s twitching or the way Nana shudders slightly each time you fire another shot into her or the way you keep pumping, refusing to let any of your cum go anywhere but as deep as you can fuck it inside her. Unfortunately, all you experience is the taste of Nana on your lips and the red, foggy haze of rapture that permeates your fucking soul. Unlucky, really.

Your orgasm ends, eventually. You force yourself to pull away, force yourself to focus so that you can see the elated expression of a well-fucked Nana. There’s the faintest hint of tears in the corners of her eyes, each one earned at her own apex of pleasure. You withdraw further, pulling out of her fully, then lay beside her and pull her into your arms.

“Hey there beautiful, you alright?”

“Not the word I would use,” Nana murmurs into your chest. “We should get caught in the rain more often …”

Once again, quiet laughter escapes you, as it always seems to when you’re with Nana. “I’ll keep that in mind,” you promise. “In the meantime, we should probably get cleaned up and showered.”

“Not yet …” Nana groans, lightly smacking you like you’re an alarm clock disrupting her beauty sleep.

“Okay okay, no rush,” you respond, pulling her close and allowing the sounds of the gentle rain to fill the room. You treasure the tranquility, basking in the simple sensations of her hands in yours and her soft breaths against your chest. Many stanzas later, the storm’s song softens, then slowly comes to a close, but you stay there together, finding solace in each other’s embrace. Eventually, once Nana’s fully recovered, you get up to turn the shower on and begin grabbing things, giving her everything she needs: tissues, wipes, water, hugs, kisses, and your undivided attention.

“I know this is an incredibly egotistical question, but can you walk?” you ask, smiling sheepishly as she rolls her eyes. “Or do you want me to carry you?”

“Yes, I can, but carry me anyways,” Nana declares, throwing open her arms and waiting expectantly.

“As you wish,” you declare with a flourish, bowing deeply before scooping Nana into your arms and carrying her bridal style into the bathroom.

“Showering together?” she asks suggestively and shamelessly.

“Showering together,” you reply warmly, setting her down and testing the water. “Let me spoil you for a bit, no need to rush.”

“Very well,” she accepts, stepping into the shower. “Now hurry and get in here so I don’t have to warm you up all over again.”

“Yes ma’am,” you respond, climbing in after her. You’ve never been more grateful for your replacement shower head and its absurd water pressure, though you make sure to get close to Nana just in case.

Even as you two rinse yourselves off, you can’t help but be mesmerized by the water flowing down Nana’s perfect figure. You watch as the many drops coat each long strand of her flowing golden locks, run down each beautiful feature that comprises her face, then finally succumbs to gravity after tracing every last millimeter of her jawline. From there, you follow their journey as they land on her collarbone and continue on into sacred territory. Thousands of individual droplets gently caress the curvature of her breasts as they pass by, while thousands more race down the soft skin of the arms and hands that inspire so many fans to dream of their embrace. For those droplets lucky enough to remain attached after traveling past her abs and below her waist, a pair of gently toned legs defined by years upon years of dance await. Finally, between the pale skin of her inner thighs, the perfectly shaven holy place of indecent desires and fantasies awaits a lucky few. Lucky you.

“You’re staring again,” Nana says, breaking you out of your reverie as she smiles shyly.

“Nana, I absolutely am,” you admit freely, shamelessly. “You’re right here in front of me and I still can’t believe you’re real.”

“Oh, um … thanks,” Nana mumbles, turning away from you just as you see a familiar splash of crimson.

“You’re welcome, now hold still,” you tell her, grabbing a bottle of conditioner and squeezing some into your hand. “Let me wash your hair.”

“Oh! I mean, okay …”

You spread the viscous liquid across your hands, then begin massaging it into the many, many strands of gold that flow together and form her hair. “This conditioner worked wonderfully back when I had lighter highlights, so hopefully it should be fine for you too.”

You trail off, focusing on the task at hand and the silk between your fingertips, but you can’t help but add, “But I wouldn’t mind buying some of whatever you normally use and keeping it here … just in case.”

Nana turns back, glaring at you for a moment before allowing you to continue. “That’s a sentence with a whole lot of implications, but you’re cute so I’ll let you get away with it.”

“Good to know! I promise to not use that information responsibly,” you jest, grinning uncontrollably as Nana huffs in indignation. “Okay, let that sit for a couple minutes before rinsing it out.”

Nana turns, stepping closer to you and keeping her hair out of the waterflow as she does so. “Can I wash yours?”

“Of course,” you tell her, handing her the bottle before closing your eyes and leaning down to allow her easier access.

“Thank you …” she murmurs. After a few anticipatory moments in the dark, you feel her hands start working their way across your head, massaging you and coating your own strands in that same liquid that you apply on a daily basis, but have never experienced like this.

A whine slips past your lips as she finishes and pulls away, causing a score of giggles to emerge as you open your eyes to see the adorable, joyous expression of Nana’s smiling face. “So, what’s next?”

“I’m going to wash my body with this,” you tell her, holding up a bottle of body wash as you hand her a different one. “And you can wash yourself with that, because if I end up putting my hands all over your body, we’re never getting out of here.”

“You’re probably right,” Nana admits, mischief taking over her smile. “However …”

“You’re not the one paying the water bill, shush!” you exclaim, turning away and beginning to lather yourself up. Nana’s laughter rings out once more, reverberating off the tight walls of your shower as she too begins to wash herself of the improprieties that cover every centimeter of each of your bodies.

Somehow, you both manage to behave, rinsing yourselves off before getting out and toweling yourselves dry. Nana sits as you brush her hair like Rapunzel, blow drying it slowly as you meticulously work your way through her golden mane. It isn’t easy to find a comfortable set of clothes for her to wear, but with a pair of rolled pant legs and a hair-tied shirt, you’re able to make do. Together, you eagerly order delivery from your favorite chicken restaurant, and while you’re waiting, begin the process of cleaning up.

Nana helps you strip your sheets, the most traumatized victims of your shared endeavors, off your bed, then assists you in wrangling a new set onto the mattress. Your heart glows with warmth at how right it feels to perform such a mundane household activity with her, even as the fitted sheet snaps up once again and nearly hits you in the face. Nana’s laughter rings out first, but yours is close behind, warding off any frustration as you enjoy the little simplicities of spending time with her. You both clean up your kitchen, sending your soaked clothes to join your laundry as hers go into the wash, cleansing them of the rain’s influence as you both settle on the couch.

“I think that’s everything we needed to take care of,” you say, just as a thought crosses your mind. “Do we need to get you some—”

“Don’t worry, I’ve been taking precautions for a bit. You know, just in case,” Nana tells you, tone relaxed but eyes alight with mischief.

“You—what—just in case?!” you sputter. “Since when?!”

“That night Wooyeon walked in on us,” Nana remarks casually. “I wasn’t gonna let you kiss me like that without finishing the job.”

You’re frozen in silence, unsure whether to follow-up with confusion, accusations, questions, gratitude, or something else entirely, but the familiar cadence of the delivery man’s knocks on the door saves you from needing an answer. After enjoying your meals and making some light conversation, you both end up on your insanely comfy couch, curled up together under your stupidly soft blanket as Nana selects another movie, this time opting for a cheesy romance flick that she swears is different from the rest. Ultimately, she’s not wrong, as any experience shared with Nana ends up being far more enjoyable than the alternatives, and you end up enjoying yourself quite a bit. You lay with her, laugh with her, and hold her close as you wipe away her tears.

Enthralled by Nana and her investment in the movie, you barely even notice as the hours pass, the clouds dissipate, and the sun shines bright for a fleeting flash before disappearing below the skyline. It’s not until the movie finishes, fading to black for the final time, that you note the darkness that’s overtaken the world outside your little corner of paradise. After confirming with her other members that she’s free tomorrow, Nana joins you getting ready for bed.

“Here, this has barely been used,” you tell her, handing her a toothbrush and smiling as a thought enters your mind. “I guess I’ll just have to get you one of those too.”

“You just might have to,” Nana says, wide grin mirroring your own as you both begin your nightly routines.

A short while later, after locking up and killing all the lights, you join Nana in bed. It’s an odd sensation as you turn off your alarm clock, something you haven’t done in months, maybe even years, but when you see the weary eyes Nana’s fighting to keep open, you decide it’s for the best. You turn to her, exchanging good night’s and I love you’s before she closes in, kissing you tenderly before turning away and snuggling close against your body. You two form a perfect fit as you hold her, refusing to let go even as sleep overtakes you. Tonight, you have neither prayers nor requests, simply gratitude for the blessing in your arms. Tonight, you dream of neither girl nor ghost, simply a warm silence that wraps itself around you in a familiar embrace.

tick…

tock…

For once, for the first time in a long, long while, your awakening is not sudden, but serene. Your eyes slowly open, witnessing the twin golden glows that illuminate the tranquil space in their soft, mellow light. You’re forced to squint slightly at the brightness of the rays of light filtering through the window, but even the rising sun pales in comparison to the radiance resting within your embrace. Nana’s resting expression is one of bliss, subtle curves of a smile hidden at the edges of her lips even as she leisurely draws breath.

Somehow, sometime in the middle of the night, she seems to have interwoven your hand with hers, clutching it tightly against her breast as she lies dormant. You can’t help but feel, in this moment, it seems almost too perfect to be a dream. Like your mind wouldn’t even entertain this as achievable in a best-case scenario. Yet here you are, blessed beyond imagination.

You get an idea, hoping to surprise her with breakfast. You slowly, delicately attempt to remove your hand from hers, but are stopped suddenly as her grip tightens. “Stopppp …”

“You’re awake?” you ask in surprise.

“Of course, since before you woke up,” Nana murmurs, pulling you closer. “I just wanted you to hold me longer.”

“Nana, I …” Your words trail off, your mind unable to even form words as you try to comprehend how you could possibly deserve something this perfect. “Thank you … Are you hungry? I was going to go make breakfast—”

“Breakfast can wait,” Nana interjects, flipping over to face you as she snuggles in even closer. “Just stay with me, like this. Please.”

This time, at least, you know exactly what to say. “Of course, Nana. Anything for you.”

She remains silent, but the pounding of her heart tells you everything you’d ever need to know. You do as she asks, pulling the covers back over you as you wrap your arm around Nana, pulling her closer as you plant a gentle kiss atop her head. Somewhere, deep in the back of your mind, you know that the clock ticks ever onwards. But as you look down and see the little smile that only you seem to bring out of Nana, you realize there’s no better way to spend an eternity than moments like this with the one you love. You’ll stay. Forever, if she wants. And with the way she clings to you, like you’re the only thing keeping her on Earth instead of up with the other angels, you trust that she’ll stay too. Maybe even forever.

tick…

tock…

tick…

tock…

“So, is hugging a common thing with you? Like, do you greet everyone you meet by trying to break their ribs?”

“Are you complaining about my hugs?!” Nana gasps, unwrapping her arms from around you and pulling away.

“No, absolutely not!” you exclaim, nearly tripping over your words as they leave your mouth at the speed of light. “I’m just curious, okay? It seems like a big thing with you.”

“Fine, I’ll answer your ridiculous question,” Nana says, retaking your arm. “I occasionally give hugs to people I’m close to. I often hug those I care about most. I always hug you.”

“Oh,” you manage to say. Your curiosity sated; you allow the comfortable silence to return. As you two walk together, you marvel at the vibrant streets, delighted in the changing of the seasons as spring brings its warmth to what was a desolate Korean winter wasteland.

Unfortunately, a single dark shop stands out amongst the rows of brightly lit stores that litter both sides of the street. Your destination, Aunt Kim’s noodle shop, seems empty.

“Oh no, it’s closed! If only someone had an apartment nearby where we could spend the evening instead,” Nana announces dramatically, looking up at you and waggling her eyebrows shamelessly.

“If only,” you say, tugging her along. “Let’s go see if she left a note saying when she’ll be back.”

“‘Closed this evening for a special occasion’,” Nana reads aloud. “‘Will return to normal business tomorrow.’ That’s strange, I wonder what’s so important that she was willing to close the shop.”

“Strange indeed,” you agree, searching around in your pocket for a moment before pulling out a key. “Wanna find out?”

Before she even has the chance to respond, you unlock the door, pushing it open and holding it for her as you invite her in.

“Give me a sec!” you call out, venturing into the darkness as she follows you inside.

“What? How did you …” Nana trails off, covering her eyes as you flip the switch and restore light to the establishment. Within, two steaming bowls wait upon a small table near the left corner of the store; upon “your” table, the one where you two have always sat over the past couple of months, the one with the edge broken off, the one that’s imperfect, but that’s okay, because nothing is. Well, except Nana.

“No but really, what is going on?” Nana asks, walking as if in a daze as she joins you at the table.

“I wanted to do something nice for you for your birthday,” you explain, pulling out the chair for her. “I thought it’d be nice to have the place to ourselves for once, and Aunt Kim was kind enough to agree. She seemed more than willing to help out, probably because of our … ahem, ‘generous contributions’ to the store.”

“Ah, I see,” Nana chuckles, smiling brightly. “Thank you, but you really didn’t have to do all this …”

“Maybe,” you admit with a shrug. “But for you, I’d do anything. This is the first time I’ve gotten to do something sweet for you, just let me spoil you for one night.”

“Alright, fine,” Nana says, huffing in mock exasperation. “Then let’s eat!”

You both eagerly dig in, savoring the familiar tastes of your favorite meals. Unsurprisingly, even as the flavors dance along your tastebuds, the sight of Nana in front of you is all that matters. Even with her golden color replaced by a dark chocolate brown, her radiant visage shines under the warm amber glow of the Edison bulbs above. You lose yourself in the sight of her, food long forgotten until her voice brings you back to reality.

“This is soooooooooo good, did you make this?”

“Oh, gods no,” you exclaim, earning a laugh from each of you. “Aunt Kim was kind enough to make it just before we arrived.”

“Okay good,” Nana replies, wry smirk locked and loaded as she continues to fire shots. “I don’t think I would have ever been able to forgive you if you brought me here just to subject me to your cooking.”

“Oh, come on,” you say, rolling your eyes and turning away to hide the smile you can’t contain. “You know you love me.”

“Obviously.”

That single word has no right to hit as hard as it does, but you can’t help but whip back around to face her. You pause, allowing the smile to slip as your voice drops. “I love you.”

“Believe it or not, even more obvious,” she responds, still attempting to hide behind levity. But you see it in the faint glimmer of her eyes, in the way her lips part slightly, in the way she leans in just the slightest bit closer.

You don’t have to move far to close the distance, leaning in and gently pressing your lips against hers. The combination of the dishes’ flavors explodes across your senses, adding a new type of spice to one of your favorite activities. Even more than usual, it drives you crazy, amplifying your hunger as you greedily up the intensity, wrapping your hand around the back of her neck and—

“Honestly, at this point, I’m not even surprised.”

Nana immediately breaks away from the kiss, turning to see Wooyeon walking in, a box in one hand and her forehead in the other.

“Seriously, we just keep having the worst timing,” you say, laughing warmly as you stand to greet her. “Thanks again for picking this up, I really appreciate it.”

“You’re very welcome,” Wooyeon responds, taking a seat next to Nana. “Your place is nice by the way.”

“Wait, you’re telling me Wooyeon got a key to your place before I did?” Nana asks indignantly. “Unbelievable, really.”

Your laughter follows you as you retreat to the kitchen, where you grab Wooyeon’s meal and return to the table. “That is a good point, I should be careful who I give those out to.”

“Indeed,” Wooyeon says, smirking sinisterly. “I might just invite myself in some time.”

“Alright alright, enough,” Nana declares as you burst into a quiet fit of laughter. “Please, can we try to have a normal dinner? It’d be nice to have an interaction between my two closest friends that isn’t awkward or cut short for once.”

The two of you agree and all three of you dive back into your dinners, casually conversing about your days, how good the food is, and basically anything at all. You happily join in, enjoying the chance to get to know Wooyeon better and seeing a new side of Nana that only her friend and fellow idol can bring out. A month ago, you never could have imagined seamlessly going from conversations about your work to stories about their backstage adventures to what movies they’d watched recently. Yet, on this especially significant day, you’re happy to join Nana at the intersection between her personal and professional life. You’re happy to make a joke and be blessed by the harmonization of Nana and Wooyeon laughing together. It’s musical, it’s magical, it’s meant to be.

“Now, will you tell me what’s in the box?” Nana eventually asks.

Wooyeon looks to you for confirmation, then reaches down and opens it, revealing an overly frosted, downright cartoonish-looking piece of cake that looks like it was taken right out of a Kirby game.

“Oh my god it’s perfect!” Nana exclaims, eagerly grabbing for her phone as you take a finger and run it through the icing. “Hey! I was gonna take a picture of that!!”

A devious smile creeps across your face as you lean forward, booping Nana on the nose and getting frosting everywhere. “HEY!”

You immediately lean away, desperately attempting her wild assault as Nana attempts to return the favor. Within a minute, you’re out of breath from laughing so hard, and from the corner of your eye you can see Wooyeon not faring much better. Nana catches you, of course, and you’re forced to suffer the consequences of your actions as bits of frosting are smeared all across your face.

Eventually, the commotion settles and you’re all able to enjoy the piece in peace, savoring the wonderful flavors as you share it together. Well after the sun sets, well after the streets outside go dark and the clock ticks past the shop’s normal closing time, the three of you remain, sharing stories, telling tales, and enjoying each other’s company. As always, a small part of you rues the passage of time, knowing that this too must come to an end. But for as long as you possibly can, you preserve this moment, refusing to take it for granted as you treasure the memory being made. Because you know that you’ll remember this night for the rest of your life. Because nights like this make you realize you’ve been gifted everything you could have ever wished for.

(My sincerest gratitude to @braaan and @majorblinks for reviewing this fic, I can’t thank you enough for how much your insights improved it and how much your love & support meant to me. This fic is dedicated to @capslocked, a known believer, and @okaylikesmomo, the newest member of the cult. I hope you enjoyed reading this story about hugs that happened to feature smut; the next story idea I intend to finish features far more snark and smut, with no hugs in sight. Anticipate it at your own risk.)

#kpop smut #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #idol x reader #idol x male reader #nana smut #nana fanfic #wooah nana #el7z up #wooah #kpop fluff

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alwaysmicado · 6 months

Text

Sink or swim

12.3k | fwb!Joel Miller x f!reader | pt. 8

WARNINGS: 18+, no outbreak AU, implied age gap, emotional hurt/comfort, flashbacks (toxic relationship, bad mental health), mention of miscarriage & surgery, smut (nothing too graphic), Tommy Miller x f!reader SUMMARY: You reminisce about the late-night conversation that changed your life forever. Joel shares a secret. A/N: Guys, it’s finally here!! This part was hard for me to write, but I’m beyond happy with how it turned out. We learn so much about reader’s past and her relationship with Tommy, and I can’t tell you how excited I am to share it with you. Have fun reading (even though it’s a bit sad) and please let me know what you think! I wanna know all your thoughts!! 🤍 Dividers by the wonderful @saradika-graphics.

series masterlist | main masterlist

The ocean stretches before you like a vast expanse of liquid silk, its rhythmic waves kissing the shore with a gentle insistence. The sun, now in its descent towards the horizon, casts a warm glow, painting the water and sand in hues of amber and gold.

You’re perched on a weathered bench, sneakers softly tapping against the sand, lost in thought as you watch the waves roll in.

Dressed in yoga shorts and an oversized t-shirt, with an ice cream cone in hand and sunglasses shielding your eyes from the brilliant rays of the setting sun, you blend seamlessly into the serene scene before you.

You appear inconspicuous, just another person soaking up the sun and breathing in the fresh air. No one can see the anguish gnawing at your heart, the tumult in your head, or the pain in your hand that makes you want to scream.

No, no, you look far too calm for that, too composed, too happy.

Besides, what would someone like you possibly have to feel bad about? Seriously. You just love to wallow in your own sadness, don’t you? You haven’t changed at all. You’re still your insecure, annoying, unlovable self. God, even your inner voice is irritating. Do you hear how pathetic you sound? Of course he wouldn’t lov–

Shut up.

You focus on the waves as they dance and sway, their melodic rhythm a soothing balm to the cruel thoughts echoing relentlessly in your mind.

The ocean’s song, a symphony of calming whispers and gentle sighs you’ve loved ever since you were a little girl, envelops you in its embrace, drawing you deeper into a state of quiet reflection. The cool breeze dancing through the air brushes against your sun-kissed skin, carrying with it the salty scent of the ocean and the promise of new beginnings.

With a gentle tilt of your head, you take another lick of the strawberry soft serve you bought at the ice cream stand near the boardwalk, feeling the familiar comfort of the cool creaminess dance across your taste buds. It’s been a few months since you last indulged in this particular treat, sharing it with Joel after a rough day at work.

As the cold sweetness melts on your tongue, bittersweet memories of that afternoon flood back with vivid clarity. You can almost hear Joel’s infectious laughter as you scarfed down the icy treat a little too eagerly, his eyes crinkling with amusement at your inevitable brain freeze. But it wasn’t just the shared laughter and playful banter that made this memory so special.

It was Joel’s genuine interest in hearing about your day, about you, his calming presence grounding you and making you momentarily forget all your troubles. He provided you with a warmth that seeped into your bones, a connection that felt effortless yet profound. Like it could be more.

Reflecting on it now, perhaps that should have been a hint that things were more serious than you wanted to admit right from the beginning. Oh well, dwelling on it is futile now. Because you did finally admit it, didn’t you? And not only that, you basically shouted your feelings from the rooftops last night, laying your soul bare.

Fucking embarrassing.

How are you supposed to come back from that? How are you supposed to ever look into Joel’s eyes again?

There’s a reason why you stopped psychotherapy after a few months, there’s a reason why you don’t have any close friends beside Tommy, there’s a reason why your dating life has consisted of a series of superficial hookups over the past couple of years.

“Fear of intimacy,” your therapist called it. “A response to sustained trauma.”

You walked out of that session and, fueled by defiance, decided to fuck the first guy who caught your eye, just to prove to yourself, and to your therapist, that you were very well capable of intimacy.

Lying in bed that night, lonely and empty, you couldn’t shake the truth of her words. You hated her guts for forcing you to confront your inner demons, but she did have a point in everything she said.

It’s an uncomfortable truth.

There’s nothing in the world you fear more than people knowing what’s going on inside your head, knowing what you feel, knowing your vulnerabilities and weaknesses—knowing the real you.

And last night, that fear came true.

Your innermost thoughts and feelings were on display for Joel to see, leaving you exposed and raw. The memory of your outburst, of his shocked face, weighs heavily on your mind and heart, filling you with a deep sense of shame and regret.

For a moment in that bathroom, you felt yourself transported back to all the times you’d scream at Simon for whatever he did to fuck with your feelings that day, just for him to laugh in your face or call you manipulative when you’d inevitably start crying tears of hurt and frustration.

Does Joel see you differently now, knowing the depths of your insecurities? Will he even want to look you in the eye after witnessing what the real you is like? Have you lost your chance with him, and, did you ever even have one?

You sigh deeply and lick around the top of the ice cream cone to catch the drops threatening to run down, humming at the deliciousness.

You haven’t eaten anything else today, too nauseous from your meds and the knot in the pit of your stomach to find food appetizing. You haven’t slept for more than two consecutive hours, too agitated to find any real peace. You also couldn’t stay home this morning, as your apartment suddenly felt like a cage threatening to suffocate you.

Instead, you’ve spent your day off window shopping, aimlessly wandering from one coffee shop to another, your hands now jittery from too much caffeine on an empty stomach. You’ve ambled down the boardwalk, taking in the sights and sounds surrounding you, before finding yourself drawn to the familiar comfort of the ocean.

From the corner of your eye, you catch the display on your phone lighting up with Joel’s name, the device resting on the bench beside you alongside your bag.

You know you’ll have to take his calls and talk to him like an adult at some point. And you will. But this moment, this moment right here, belongs to you and your thoughts alone.

And to the hermit crab making its way through the sand just a few feet away from you. Your lips curl into a smile as you watch the determined little creature, impressed by its resilience in such an unforgiving world. Maybe you would’ve been happier if you’d been born as a hermit crab. Who knows.

As you swallow the last bit of your cone and lean back, feeling the sun’s gentle warmth on your skin, you can’t help but think of the first time you found yourself on this bench, watching the sunset. It feels like that was an entire lifetime ago, and yet, you vividly remember the overwhelming exhaustion that weighed you down, the sense of loneliness that engulfed you—how utterly lost you felt.

You allow your thoughts to drift, captivated by the soothing cadence of the waves lapping against the shore.

Three years earlier

The sun is down.

Staring into the void, you’re consumed by solitude, the cool breeze coming from the water a thin barrier against the weight pressing on your shoulders. The world seems distant, the murmur of the ocean a mere backdrop to the thoughts swirling in your troubled mind and the beat of your empty heart.

This is it. This is where you were always supposed to be.

You take a deep breath and close your eyes, quietly drifting through the corners of your memory. With each passing moment, you meticulously comb through the fragments of the past few months. They offer no solace, only a stark reminder of how you reached this point.

In the stillness of the evening, you find a strange sense of calm, a numbness that dulls the edges of your emotions. Tears refuse to come, leaving only the echo of relief at the resolution of it all.

You open your eyes again, fixating on the endless mirror of the sky before you. The ocean has always held a special place in your heart. The salty tang in the air, the rhythmic melody of the waves, the laughter of birds mingling with the gentle lull of the breeze—everything.

You dig your naked toes into the sand, relishing the connection to the earth beneath you. The sensation is grounding, peaceful, almost–

“Hey there, sweetheart. Is everything okay?”

A man’s voice, rugged yet gentle, breaks through the silence, interrupting your thoughts. His words dance in the air, pulling you reluctantly back to the present.

Are you kidding me?

With a slow and deliberate movement, you lift your gaze from the horizon, meeting the eyes of the stranger who has disrupted the sanctuary of your thoughts. You rest your elbows on your knees and sigh deeply.

“Oh my fucking god,” you murmur, rubbing your temples in annoyance and disbelief. “The sun’s been down for two minutes, and the first creep’s already here.”

“Wha–”

You look up at him. “Do you have like a radar or something where you get a notification every time a woman sits alone on a bench somewhere?”

The dark-haired man blinks in surprise, his expression caught between confusion and amusement. His brow furrows, his mouth slightly agape as he processes your words. After a moment of absorbing your outlandish accusation, his lips curve into a wry smile.

“Darlin’, I’m just–”

“Look, dude. If you’re here to murder me, could you at least spare me the whole blah blah you’ve got planned and just do it? Thank you.”

You look at him with a raised eyebrow, his eyes crinkling at the corners. He’s not entirely sure if you’re joking, but your sarcastic tone tells him you’re at least not scared of him.

He chuckles softly, shaking his head. “I assure you I got no such plans. Just thought I’d check in on a fellow soul contemplating the mysteries of the universe.”

You roll your eyes, unimpressed by his attempt at humor. “Yeah, well, I prefer to contemplate in peace.”

When he doesn’t budge and just…stares at you with those big, dark eyes of his, you take a moment to size him up.

Your gaze drifts down from his eyes, tracing the contours of his muscular chest visible beneath a fitted white t-shirt. It lingers briefly on the obnoxiously large belt buckle adorning his waist, then travels down the length of his denim-clad legs to his cowboy boots. Despite the surreal encounter, you can’t help but notice how incredibly attractive he is.

God, what’s wrong with you?

“Look, sweetheart,” he says calmly, his voice a blend of warmth and reassurance. “I’m not trying to get into your business or anything, but it’s gonna get pretty chilly out here soon.” He tilts his head and studies your face. “Do you have somewhere to stay?” he asks. “We could go grab a bite to eat if you want, and my place is right arou–”

“How subtle,” you scoff, crossing your arms in front of your chest. “I’m not going home with you, dude.”

“Fair enough, but at least let me call you a cab and wait with you until it arrives, hm?”

His soft voice and patronizing tone are starting to grate on your already frayed nerves. You’ve been sitting here, not taking up any space, minding your own fucking business, and even that wasn’t good enough, apparently.

Okay, world. Hint taken.

“What the hell is your problem?” you blurt out.

“What do you mean? I’m just–I’m trying to help you.”

“Why?” The question bursts from your lips like a dam breaking under pressure, laced with frustration. “Do you see me holding up a sign where I’m asking for your help? Huh? Or is this more about you and some, I dunno, bullshit white knight fantasy you’re acting out?”

Your eyes narrow, fixing on him with a challenging glare, daring him to justify his intrusion into your solitude.

“No,” he responds calmly, his furrowed brow adding gravity to his words. “It’s because I’ve seen enough shit in my life to recognize when someone’s in need.”

The sincerity in his gaze catches you off guard, rendering you momentarily speechless. It’s as if this…stranger is peering into the depths of your soul, seeing past the walls you’ve erected to protect yourself.

His face softens, the lines around his eyes relaxing as he meets yours. “Mind if I take a seat?”

You shrug indifferently, though a flicker of curiosity dances behind your eyes. “Suit yourself.”

He smiles warmly as he settles beside you. “I’m Tommy, by the way,” he offers, extending a hand. You hesitate for a moment, but eventually, you decide to reciprocate by telling him your name and shaking his hand with a soft sigh.

As his hand envelops yours, there’s a brief surge of something unspoken deep inside you, a connection allowing two disparate souls to briefly intertwine before returning to their separate paths again as soon as he lets go.

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you, darlin’,” he says with a twinkle in his eye, his mustache curling slightly as he smiles at you.

The faint scent of his cologne drifts towards you, mixing with the salty aroma of the sea air. As you gaze at him, your eyes trace the lines etched around his eyes and mouth, evidence of a life fully lived. Strangely, there’s something comforting about his presence, something that makes you feel a little less alone.

You give him a subtle smile before turning your head back towards the ocean, mesmerized by the rhythmic crashing of the waves against the shore.

Out of the corner of his eye, Tommy watches you silently, noticing the vacant look in your eyes and the way your gaze seems to be fixed on some distant point beyond the horizon. He furrows his brow slightly, a flicker of concern crossing his features as he contemplates how lost you appear in that moment.

“What are you doing out here, sweetheart?” Tommy’s voice breaks the silence, his tone casual yet curious, as if striking up conversations with strange women on the beach is a regular occurrence for him.

Well, it probably is, you think to yourself.

“I, uh, wanted to watch the sunset,” you answer softly.

“Hm. It’s amazing, isn’t it? Should’ve been here and seen it too instead of wasting my time at that damn bar.”

“Oh? How did you waste your time? Can’t have been that bad, judging by the lipstick stains on your face,” you murmur.

“What? Where?” Tommy blurts out, his eyes widening in surprise as he hastily rubs at his lips and cheeks, searching for any traces of lipstick on his fingers.

You stifle a laugh. “I’m just fucking with you,” you deadpan, shooting him a quick glance.

He stares at you in mock offense for a moment before his lips curl into a wide grin. “Touché,” he says, thoroughly entertained by your dry humor. “But yeah, things didn’t go the way I would’ve liked them to.”

“What, she didn’t wanna go home with you either?”

“Very funny. But no, things were going well.” He sighs dramatically and rubs his forehead. “But then her husband showed up and kinda threw a giant monkey wrench into our plans.”

“Wow, tough break,” you scoff, shaking your head in mock sympathy, “not getting to fuck a married woman. I hate it when that happens.”

Tommy chuckles. “Alright, alright, I didn’t know she was married, for the record. She wasn’t wearing a ring or anything.”

“Sure,” you say, your tone dripping with sarcasm as you cast a skeptical glance in his direction.

“What are you up to, then, darlin’? Hm?” he asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Besides not making out with married women?” You hear Tommy’s laugh beside you and wiggle your toes in the sand. “Just enjoying the ocean, I guess. I’ve missed it.”

“You’re not from here?”

You shake your head. “No, I’m not.”

“Hm. You’re gonna love it. There’s lots of cool things to see and do, especially for young people like you.”

You furrow your brow. “Why are you talking like you’re ninety years old and I’m your estranged grandkid?”

“I dunno,” he sighs, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I guess…turning forty did something to me.”

“Married women apparently still throw themselves at you. You’re gonna be fine.”

He chuckles, a deep, resonant sound that seems to echo across the beach. “Yeah, I guess you’re right about that.”

You’re both quiet for a moment, punctuated by the gentle sound of the ocean and the occasional cry of seagulls wheeling overhead.

“What brings you here, then?” Tommy asks, observing your profile. You look tired.

“I told you, watching the sunset.”

“No, I mean what brings you into town? Vacation or family or something?”

You turn to look at him, tilting your head slightly as you study his expression. “Why do you care?”

“Just making conversation,” he says with a smile, a glint of genuine curiosity shining in his eyes. “You don’t have to tell me. We can talk about something else if you want.”

“Like what?”

“Like did you know it’s illegal to own just one guinea pig in Switzerland?”

Your bewildered look amuses him.

“It’s true. You’re required, by law, to get your guinea pig a little guinea pig friend. They won’t sell you just one. Isn’t that the cutest thing you’ve ever heard?”

You stare at him, shaking your head slowly. “What kind of women do you pull if this is how you flirt?”

Tommy raises an eyebrow. “Who says I’m flirting?”

“Uh-huh,” you say with a smirk, then turn your head back towards the water. “But what if they want to be alone?”

“Hm?”

“What if you get a guinea pig in Switzerland and you have to buy a second one to keep it company but the first guinea pig actually just wants to be alone on a bench and then some other guinea pig with a mustache shows up and asks weird questions? What then?”

“Well,” Tommy starts, happy that you’re seemingly warming up a bit. “I think the first guinea pig would quickly realize that the other, dashingly handsome guinea pig isn’t that bad and just wants to be friends. And then they’d be friends and run around together and eat hay or whatever.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, and you know, I think us humans aren’t that different from them. I don’t think we’re meant to be alone either.”

You look at him. “Is that why you came to talk to me? Because you don’t want me to be alone?”

“Would that be so bad?”

“I guess not,” you murmur softly, your gaze drifting to the patch of dry skin on the back of your right hand. “And I’m, uh, not here for any special reason. I just…needed a break from home, I suppose.”

“And you have a place to stay, darlin’?” Tommy’s voice carries a gentle concern as he leans slightly closer, trying to see your eyes.

“Yeah, I booked a hotel room a few minutes from here,” you lie smoothly. “With sea-view and everything. Just haven’t checked in yet.”

“Where did you put all your stuff?”

“My stuff?”

“Yeah, your clothes and teddy bears and whatnot.”

You nudge the backpack sitting on the ground next to you with your naked foot. “This is my stuff.”

“Oh.” You must have really wanted to get away if you traveled this lightly, Tommy contemplates silently.

He used to do the same, packing a bag and escaping, seeking solace in the open road. But he learned the hard way that you can’t outrun your problems. They always find a way to catch up with you, no matter how far you go.

He gives you a sympathetic smile. “Have you had dinner already?”

“I had a bagel at the airport this morning,” you say nonchalantly.

Tommy’s brows furrow slightly, his eyes widening in disbelief. “Are you serious?”

“Yup.” If you had even the slightest bit of energy left inside of you, you’d find his shocked face amusing.

“Okay, that’s just unacceptable. Wait.” He retrieves his phone from his pocket and opens a food delivery app. “What kind of pizza do you want?”

You shake your head. “I don’t want pi–”

“Yes, you do. I’m not gonna have you starving on my watch.”

You raise an eyebrow. “On your watch?”

“Yeah, on my watch. Now, what kind of topping–”

“Pineapple.”

“Excuse me?”

“Pine. Apple.”

“Oh, but I’m the weirdo,” he mutters, shaking his head and giving you the side-eye as he reluctantly adds pineapple as a topping to your pizza. “Anything else? Anchovies? Corn? My tears?”

“Jesus, don’t have a heart attack. Are you Italian or something?”

“No, just not a complete monster.”

You can’t help but chuckle, your smile lighting up your face for the first time in what feels like ages. Tommy’s eyes linger on you a moment too long, captivated by your sudden radiance, before he tears his gaze away as your smile fades once more.

Clearing his throat, he shifts his attention back to his task, fingers tapping away as he types the description of your location for the delivery.

“Should arrive in twenty minutes, the app says.”

You nod and lean back, fiddling with the hem of your shirt as you watch the waves again.

“When did you decide to fly out here?”

“Last night.”

“How? Why?”

“Simple. I took out a map, closed my eyes, and this is where my finger landed. And as for the why…well, home just didn’t feel like home anymore, you know?”

“Hm. I know that feeling.”

You turn your head and look into his warm eyes. “You do?”

“Oh yeah. It took me almost a decade after retiring from active duty to feel home again, or like I was safe, or like I belonged. It’s, uh, not easy to get that feeling back once you’ve lost it. I’m sorry you’re going through that,” Tommy says with a somber tone. He really is sorry.

You look at him for a moment and give him a tired smile. “It’s okay,” you say with a shrug of your shoulders. “It wasn’t home to begin with. Not really.”

“Whatever your reasons are, you’re brave for leaving.”

You scoff. “Yeah, sure, I’m brave for running away.”

“Sweetheart…”

“Look, it’s okay. You don’t need to try and make me feel better ‘cause I’m not sad. But I’m also not gonna act like I’m not a coward who accepted far too much shit for far too long ‘cause I’m very much not brave.”

You sigh deeply. “I should’ve gotten the fuck out of that miserable town and relationship years ago. But now it’s too late.”

Tommy furrows his brow and opens his mouth to say something, but you cut him off.

“Are you married?”

“No, darlin’, I’m not married.”

“Girlfriend?”

“No girlfriend.”

“So there’s no one special in your life right now?”

“Nothing serious, no. No attachments for me.”

“Hm. No attachments,” you murmur. “That sounds nice.”

Tommy nods. “It is, most of the time at least. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss being in love.”

“You’ve been in love before?” You tilt your head and look at him with genuine curiosity.

“A few times, yeah.”

“And the women you were with…they loved you?”

“Yeah, they did.” The soft smile lighting up his face tells you he has pleasant memories of his former partners. How nice that must be.

“Do you ever wonder why it didn’t work out?”

Tommy’s expression turns introspective, his gaze drifting towards the horizon as if searching for answers in the distant waves.

“I have,” he admits after a pause, his voice carrying a hint of wistfulness. “But I guess that’s just how life goes sometimes. People drift apart, circumstances change, life changes...”

“Do you think it’s possible to hate someone you love?”

Your question catches him off guard, and the look in your eyes concerns him. “Well,” he says calmly, carefully choosing his words, “I can’t say I’ve ever had that experience, but I could imagine that’s how my brother felt about me back when I was spiraling and he had to watch me make bad decision after bad decision. He loved me, I know he always has, but he also hated me for what I was doing.”

“Sounds like a good brother,” you say, mustering a smile.

“He really is. Do you have any siblings?”

“Yeah, but I don’t talk to them,” you say, your tone betraying a hint of sadness before you quickly mask it with indifference. “My, uh…best friend was like my sister though.”

“Was?”

“Yeah, you know,” you murmur, the smile on your lips not matching the bitterness in your tone, “that friendship kinda ended after I saw her sitting on my boyfriend’s lap, shoving her tongue down his throat.”

“What the hell? When was that?”

“Hmm, about a month ago. And you wanna know the real kicker? They’ve been fucking for like half a year. My best friend and my boyfriend. Laughing their asses off behind my back. Hilarious, isn’t it?”

“I’m so sorry, darlin’. They’re shitty people for doing that to you. You didn’t deserve any–”

“How do you know that?”

“Know what?”

“How do you know that I didn’t deserve it? You don’t know me, you don’t know anything about me.”

“I may not know you,” Tommy says gently, “but I know that no one deserves to be treated like that, especially by the people they trust. It’s hard sometimes to see things objectively because we’re our own worst enemies, but I’m telling you, you didn’t deserve that.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.”

“What makes you say that?”

You look into his eyes, and the pain he can see in yours breaks his heart.

“Because, I fucking loved it. Everything he did to me, all these years. I loved it. I could’ve left him after he cheated on me for the first time, the second time, the hundredth time, but no. I loved how he came crawling back to me time and time again, promising me the world, telling me he only loved me.”

You pull away, hands resting on his chest as you try to find your words. Simon’s intense gaze has your mind swirling with conflicting emotions, and your heart pounding in your chest. “I can’t do this anymore,” you whisper, your body trembling as he presses you against the wall with his body. “You–you say you’ll change, you say you’ll never do it again, you say you regret hurting me. And I forgive you. Every time. But nothing ever changes. You do it again and again, not caring how much you hurt me.” He places a hand on the wall next to your head, pushing your shirt up around your waist with the other, his touch on your naked skin sending a shiver down your spine. He looks down at you with a hint of amusement, a devious smirk appearing on his face as he searches your pleading eyes. “I’m serious, Simon,” you insist, unsuccessfully trying to convince yourself of what you’re saying. “I’m done.” Leaning in, he traces your neck with his nose, your heavy breathing and the way your tits press against his chest making his cock twitch in his jeans. “Is that so?” he murmurs against your skin before softly sucking and kissing on your flesh. “Why are you doing this?” you breathe, instinctively wrapping your arms around him, your fingers gripping his shoulders as you draw him closer. His leg between yours presses against your core, and you can’t help but whimper desperately at the feeling. “I love you,” he whispers, his warm breath gently caressing the curve of your ear, his words piercing your heart like a poisonous dart. “No, you don’t,” you murmur, your voice heavy with sadness, your eyes betraying the turmoil raging within you. Despite the ache in your heart, a part of you still yearns for the comfort of his touch, the familiarity of his presence, the illusion of affection he gives you. You need him, need to feel him, need him to love you—even if it kills you. In this moment of vulnerability, you surrender to the torrent of emotions flooding your senses, pressing your lips against his in a desperate attempt to drown out the pain, to silence the screams that plague your mind—eagerly drinking his poison straight from the source. Tangling your fingers in his hair, you pull him closer, offering yourself up to him with each rough tug, fervent kiss, and harsh bite to his lips. He matches your energy, gripping the back of your neck with a bruising hold as he hastily opens his jeans to free his cock. “I hate you,” you choke out, the words laced with bitterness and the raw intensity of your need for him as your heart races and your vision blurs. “Whatever you gotta tell yourself, baby,” Simon murmurs with a smirk, his words a cruel reminder of the tangled web of emotions that binds you to him, even as you struggle to break free. With a deft movement, he pulls aside your panties, sliding his hard cock through your wet folds as he holds your leg up around his waist. “Oh fuck,” you moan as he pushes inside you in one harsh thrust, your fingernails reflexively digging into his scalp. Overwhelming pleasure mingles with the anguish of your body betraying you, even as your mind screams in protest. Your walls clench around Simon with fierce intensity, his repeated thrusts against your G-spot having you close to orgasm within a minute. “Tell me, baby,” he pants, his eyes gleaming with triumph and satisfaction as he watches in real time how his poison travels through your entire body, your mind, intoxicating your very being with his essence. “Tell me how much you hate me while you come on my cock.”

You tilt your head and give Tommy a tired smile. “Isn’t that the most pathetic thing you’ve ever heard?”

“No, sweetheart, you’re not pathetic for wanting to be loved. You’re human and our feelings can be…complicated, irrational, dangerous. But you got yourself away from a toxic situation despite your feelings and that takes a lot of strength.”

“Hm.” You draw shapes into the sand with your toes, your heart heavy in your chest.

“Is he…why you left? You had to get away from him?”

“Surprisingly, no,” you say pensively, lost in thought as you fold one leg beneath you on the bench. “Things weren’t that bad after I decided not to care anymore. You know you can just wake up one day and realize it hurts a lot less to just not care about anything? Amazing. So yeah, that’s what I did.” You shrug and rub your left thumb with your right one.

“Of course, he didn’t like that at all, not being able to emotionally drain me anymore. He even told me I was depressed or some shit, acting like he cared, when all he actually missed was me giving him the reactions he wanted,” you scoff, bitterness dripping from your lips. “Coincidentally, that’s when he and my best friend started fucking.”

“I’m so sorry, darlin’, that’s beyond fucked up. Do you, uh, have someone to talk to about all this?”

You raise an eyebrow. “You mean apart from handsome cowboys in too-tight jeans late at night?”

“Did you just call me handsome?”

“Don’t think so,” you give him a playful smile, then turn your head to watch the waves doing their mesmerizing dance. Despite the light-hearted banter, a hint of sadness flickers across your face. “But no, I don’t have anyone left.”

Tommy’s expression softens, his eyes reflecting a mix of empathy and concern as he listens to your words. He reaches out, but catches himself before his hand comes to rest on your shoulder.

“Why did you leave?” he asks gently.

“I saw her.”

“Who?”

“Laura. My best friend,” you say, shuddering at her name. “I came out of the hospital yesterday, stood at a red light, and then I saw her. Looking right at me from the other side of the street. We hadn’t talked since before I almost died a month ago, ‘cause she never bothered to answer any of my calls or texts…and there she was. Daring to look at me with those fake-ass tears in her eyes like she isn’t a fucking sociopath.”

“What did you do?”

“I just…looked at her, knowing I could never see her again. I walked away, went to mine and Simon’s apartment, grabbed a few things, and went to the airport.”

“And now you’re here.”

“And now I’m here.”

The weight of your experience hangs heavy in the air, casting a somber shadow over the conversation. Tommy nods thoughtfully as he absorbs your words, until he suddenly shakes his head, chastising himself for his own stupidity.

“Okay wait, I’m sorry, but did you just say you almost died? What the hell happened?”

“Oh,” you scoff, a wide smile spreading across your face, its brightness contrasting sharply with the dullness in your eyes, “it’s nothing. One of my fallopian tubes burst ‘cause my dumbass gynecologist failed to diagnose an ectopic pregnancy, so I was hemorrhaging and had to have emergency surgery to get it removed.”

Tommy’s reaction is visceral: his eyes widen in shock, and his mouth falls open slightly, a silent gasp escaping him as the gravity of your words, spoken with horrifying casualness, hits him like a punch to the gut.

“Jesus Christ, darlin’...”

“But hey, the doctor said I’m completely fine at the check-up yesterday, so I guess that’s what I am.” You shrug and smile at him, but your attempt to lighten the mood falls flat.

“Darlin’, I’m so sor–”

“Don’t, please. It’s okay,” you interrupt softly, shaking your head. “My ex told me to have an abortion when I told him I was pregnant, and I wouldn’t have been a good mom anyway, so it’s best for the baby that it wasn’t born into the shitshow that is my life.”

“Dar–”

“I swear to God, Tommy, if you say ‘darlin’’ in that stupid, sexy accent of yours one more time,” you cut him off with a playful glare.

He smiles at you, though worry lingers in his eyes and tugs at his heart.

“I’ve always wanted to live near the ocean,” you muse, welcoming the breeze cooling your hot face down. “It’s kind of poetic that my journey ends here.”

“It really is beautiful here, I’m sure you’d love livi–” Tommy starts, but you’re not hearing him.

“You know, I have this recurring dream where I drown, but instead of feeling panicked or scared I just feel peaceful, light. Like the weight of the world is lifted off my shoulders. I don’t thrash or struggle, I just…let the water take me under and I can finally breathe.”

Concern flashes in Tommy’s eyes, but he quickly masks it with a calm expression, not wanting to alarm you.

“That sounds intense,” he responds gently, choosing his words carefully. “Dreams can be strange sometimes, but that one sounds like it’s trying to tell you something. Maybe it’s your mind’s way of processing all the heavy things that’ve been weighing on you."

He shifts slightly closer to you, his tone soft and reassuring. “But you know, maybe it’s worth exploring with a therapist or someone who can help you unpack it. Sometimes talking about these things can bring some clarity and relief.”

“Yeah, maybe,” you say absentmindedly.

“Darlin’, please look at me,” Tommy’s voice breaks through the haze of your thoughts, his gaze penetrating through the fog of your mind. If you had any tears left to cry, the sincerity in his eyes would surely coax them out right about now.

“About what you said earlier…you–you don’t deserve people treating you badly, or any of the bad things that happen to you. You never did, you hear me? You were supposed to be loved, protected and cared for, but you weren’t, and that’s not fair, and most certainly not your fault.”

You tilt your head, studying his face intently. Why does he care? Why couldn’t he just leave you alone? But hey, he’s trying to be nice, and it’s not like you’re ever going to see him again. So, you’re trying to be nice back.

“Thanks,” you say softly, mustering a smile. “But enough about me and my dumpster fire of a life.” You shift in your seat, untucking your leg and stretching it out in front of you.

“I’d rather hear about you and how you get your hair to be this healthy. I can never get mine to look that good. Do you think it’s because I just eat garbage, don’t drink enough water and don’t get enough sunlight?”

Tommy chuckles and nods understandingly, recognizing your attempt to shift gears, and decides to play along until you both hear the pizza guy calling for you.

Your insistence to pay for your own pizza and drink falls on deaf ears, so you begrudgingly accept Tommy’s invitation and thank him for ordering food. Surprisingly, you find yourself ravenously hungry after taking the first few bites of your pineapple pizza—that you originally only wanted to mess with Tommy. But even he has to admit it isn’t half bad after you make him eat a slice.

As you’re eating together and the night deepens around you, the street lamps along the boardwalk spending enough light, you ask Tommy about his life.

He shares his journey of enlisting in the army as a teenager, grappling with PTSD upon his return, and navigating through troubled times. He tells you about the unwavering support of his brother and how therapy helped him cope with his demons. You delve deeper, asking him about his wishes for the future, about his hopes and dreams.

You enjoy hearing about his life, about his experiences that are so different from yours. It’s comforting to get lost in someone else’s story for a bit. It’s a refuge, a welcome escape from your own tiring existence.

Pizzas devoured, you sit side by side, enveloped in the soothing melody of the ocean’s whispers. Time seems to lose its grip as you share both laughter and quiet, the minutes and hours slipping away unnoticed like grains of sand carried by the tide.

As tranquility settles between you, the world around you seemingly forgotten, a question gnaws at your insides, its weight palpable in the silence. It’s a question you’re reluctant to voice aloud, knowing it will rupture the delicate bubble you and Tommy have found yourselves in. Yet, it persists, demanding acknowledgment, refusing to be ignored.

You take a deep breath.

“Tommy?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?”

He gives you a reassuring smile. “Of course, darlin’.”

“Why won’t you go home?”

Oh. Tommy looks deeply into your eyes, his own filled with turmoil, and finds that he can’t lie to you.

“I can’t,” he admits softly, turning his gaze towards the distant horizon.

You nod slowly, turning your head towards the water as well. “You know why I’m here.”

“Yes,” he says simply, his acknowledgment laden with a quiet understanding.

You steal a glance at him, your eyes searching for comfort in the weary lines on his face. With a tentative gesture, you place your hand on the bench between you, a subtle invitation for connection.

Tommy, sensing your unspoken plea, catches the movement from the corner of his eye. His gaze meets yours as you turn your head, and in that shared moment of vulnerability, he understands. Without a word, he responds, reaching out to cover your hand with his own.

His touch is protective, a silent promise that you’re not alone.

“Do you…do you think that makes me a bad person?” you whisper, your voice trembling as you lay bare the depths of your fears.

“No,” he responds softly, his gaze meeting yours with unwavering sincerity. “You’re not a bad person for feeling the way you do.”

For the first time since your miscarriage, tears glisten in your eyes, shimmering like fragments of shattered dreams under the moonlight. Tommy’s words offer a glimmer of solace, touching your broken heart.

Silence settles between you two, heavy with shared pain. You sit like that for a while, two strangers finding kinship in the gentle embrace of this summer night.

Gently squeezing your hand, Tommy turns to look at you after a few minutes. “I need you to do something for me,” he says, his voice tinged with urgency. You look into his eyes, finding comfort in the warmth of his presence.

“Please stay with me tonight,” he pleads, his fingers tightening around yours, anchoring you to the present moment as if afraid you might slip away into the night.

“We can stay here, we can go for drinks, we can go dancing, we can break into the zoo—whatever you want, sweetheart. We don’t have to talk about anything, and I promise I won’t bother you anymore if tomorrow you decide that’s what you want, but please give me a chance to show you that I ca–”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.”

As the gentle breeze around you whispers secrets of hope and renewal, you find yourself nodding in agreement, a silent promise to give him the chance he so earnestly seeks—to let him show you the light that flickers within the darkness.

Tommy is momentarily stunned as he searches your face for any sign of hesitation. But there’s none to be found—only a quiet resolve that speaks volumes. A wave of relief washes over him, and he can’t hold back the wide grin spreading across his face.

“So, there’s a place a few minutes from here where we could dance, or there’s the bar I went to earlier, or we could–”

“Tommy?”

“Yes, darlin’?”

“I’m tired. Could we maybe…could we go home?”

Tommy’s face lights up even more. “Yes, yes, of course, darlin’. My place is right around the corner.”

“Great,” you say with a small smile.

You put your socks and sneakers back on, your movements slow and unsteady after hours of sitting. As you stand up for the first time, your legs wobble beneath you, but Tommy is quick to react, reaching out to steady you with his hands on your waist.

“Sorry,” you mumble, cheeks heating up as you realize your hands are gripping his shoulders for support.

“That’s alright, darlin’. I got you.”

“You’re so cheesy, you know that?” you say with a playful roll of your eyes before removing your hands and taking a step back.

“Look me in the eye and tell me it’s not working,” he teases back with a smirk.

“Whatever. Can we go?” You raise an eyebrow, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

“After you, my lady,” Tommy says with a gallant flourish, gesturing for you to go first. You shake your head with a theatrical sigh, but play along and start walking.

He falls into step beside you, eager to lift your spirits with an array of random animal facts he’s accumulated over the years, and, much to your amusement, with some particularly funny stories about failed hookups, like the one from tonight.

As you draw closer to his apartment, he suddenly sucks in a sharp breath and comes to a halt.

“What’s wrong?” you ask.

“I’m so sorry, I forgot to ask if you need anything.”

“Like what?”

“I dunno, tampons, make-up wipes, solution for your contacts, hair conditioner, lotion—I don’t think I have any of that at home, but there’s a convenience sto–”

“It’s okay,” you reassure him, touched by his consideration. “I got all my essentials in my backpack and really don’t need anything fancy. Thank you, though.”

“Are you–”

“Yes, I’m sure,” you interrupt softly. “Thank you.”

Arriving at Tommy’s apartment, you’re struck by its elegant yet welcoming nature. It’s spacious and tastefully furnished, with a modern aesthetic that speaks to Tommy’s discerning taste. You can’t help but wonder if his job as a contractor affords him such a nice living space or if he’s secretly a trust fund kid—or a very successful drug dealer.

“Must be nice,” you think to yourself.

As Tommy ushers you inside, you’re enveloped in a sense of warmth and comfort as the space feels distinctly homey, with its wooden furnishings and cozy accents that evoke a rustic charm. The polished hardwood floors gleam under soft lamplight, casting a warm glow throughout the living room.

Tommy assures you that you’re welcome to make yourself at home as he heads into the kitchen to get you a glass of water.

Despite its hominess, the apartment remains impeccably clean and organized—a testament, perhaps, to Tommy’s meticulous nature. Every surface is spotless, every item in its proper place, reflecting a discipline that may well stem from his army training.

As you explore further, you do notice small touches that hint at Tommy’s personality—framed photos of him and his friends, a worn but well-loved armchair and couch positioned opposite the TV, horse figurines on the sideboard, and a few potted plants scattered throughout, adding a touch of life to the space.

Your eyes are eventually drawn to the record player nestled in one corner, surrounded by a collection of vinyl records. The sight brings a smile to your face, appreciating the nostalgic feeling it gives you. You’re pretty sure you used to have the same model in your childhood home.

“Here you go, sweetheart,” you hear Tommy’s voice behind you as he hands you the glass of water with a knowing smile. “You like Jazz?”

“Thanks. And yeah, I guess?”

“Okay, wait a sec.” He moves with practiced ease, flipping through his collection of vinyl records until he finds the one he’s looking for. With a gentle touch, he carefully removes the chosen record from its sleeve, handling it delicately as if it were a precious artifact.

You sip on your water and watch in fascination as he places the record onto the turntable, the soft click of the needle finding its groove. As the first notes of a smooth jazz melody fill the air, you can’t help but smile, the music enveloping you in its warm embrace.

Tommy catches your eye and grins, nodding in approval as if to say, “See, I knew you’d like it.”

You roll your eyes and nudge his arm with your elbow.

“Want me to show you around?”

“Sure.”

“Okay, so this is the bedroom,” he says, leading you down the hallway and into the room where you’ll be sleeping. The bed sits neatly made, its dark sheets promising a restful night ahead. “I’ll change the sheets for you in a bit, okay? And I’ll be sleeping in the living room on the couch.”

“I, uh,” you murmur, but stop yourself, shaking your head. “No, forget it.”

“What is it? It’s okay, you can tell me.” He searches your eyes as you meet his gaze, waiting patiently for you to answer him.

“Could you maybe…not change the sheets?”

Tommy’s eyebrows raise in surprise, but he doesn’t make it awkward. Instead, he nods understandingly and immediately assures you, “Sure, I’ll leave the bed as it is then.”

You offer him a grateful smile and as if sensing your need for comfort, he asks, “Do you need a shirt to sleep?” Without waiting for your response, he retrieves one of his shirts and hands it to you.

“Thank you,” you say quietly, taking the shirt from him and holding it close. It’s soft and smells nice.

“And here’s the bathroom,” Tommy continues, leading you through the space. “Feel free to take a shower if you want. Spare towels are here, and there’s a new toothbrush in the cabinet here. Toothpaste is over there. I even got fancy face masks if you wanna try, they’re in here. You think you got everything you need?”

“I think so,” you smile at him before leaving the bathroom to grab your backpack.

As you’re about to head back, Tommy slips in ahead of you. You watch as he discreetly removes all the razor blades, a silent but clear gesture of concern for your well-being. You understand what he’s doing, and although it stirs a pang of humiliation and shame inside you, you don’t say anything and act like you didn’t see it.

After he leaves the bathroom, you take a moment to compose yourself before closing the door, peeing, taking off your clothes, and catching a glimpse of the small surgery scars on your belly. They appear to be healing well, already looking much better than even a week ago.

With a deep breath, you turn on the shower, allowing the warm water to cascade over your body, soothing away some of your tension. As you lather up, enveloped in the steam and the rich scent of Tommy’s body wash, there’s a knock on the door, interrupting your thoughts.

“Darlin’?” Tommy’s voice sounds through the door.

“Yeah?”

“Just wanted to check if you were okay.”

“I’m okay. But you seriously need to start buying body wash for adults, dude. I’m gonna be smelling like a fourteen-year-old boy now, and I don’t know how to feel about it,” you tease.

“Ha ha, you brat. Enjoy your shower.”

You smile to yourself and appreciate how clean Tommy’s shower is as, in your experience, that is not something you can count on with men who live alone.

As you lather shampoo into your hair, you close your eyes, allowing yourself a moment of peace amidst the chaos of recent events. It’s all so surreal.

Once rinsed, you step out of the shower and wrap yourself in one of Tommy’s plush towels, the soft fabric hugging your body in a tight embrace. With the steam still lingering in the air, you take your time cleaning your face, brushing your teeth and detangling your wet hair, these simple acts of self-care something you’ve neglected in the weeks prior.

Luckily, your past self decided to pack a fresh pair of panties and a pair of soft yoga pants you can change into now, Tommy’s shirt completing your pajamas for tonight.

Slowly, you step out of the bathroom, the soft light of the living room floor lamp casting a warm glow on the scene before you. Tommy’s sitting on the couch, bathed in the gentle ambiance of the record player’s music.

With a glass of whiskey in hand, he seems lost in thought, fingers rhythmically tapping against the glass, his eyes focused on the spinning vinyl. As you approach, he looks up, a small smile gracing his lips as he welcomes you to join him.

“Okay yeah, I get it,” he quips, his tone playful as he notices how perfectly his shirt accentuates your eye color. “You look better in my shirt than I ever could. There’s really no need to rub it in.”

Chuckling, you settle into the cushion beside him, feeling the warmth of his presence. It feels oddly comforting to be close to him again, his cologne a familiar scent.

But as you sit beside him now, something shifts in the air, a subtle change that you can’t quite pinpoint. It’s as if a newfound awareness has settled between you, casting a different light on the space you share. And as you steal glances at Tommy, you start to feel restless, your heart rate quickening.

Oh.

The realization dawns on you slowly, creeping in like the first light of dawn, illuminating the depths of your emotions. You find yourself unable to tear your gaze away from him, mesmerized by the way he sits on the couch, his posture relaxed yet undeniably confident.

Your eyes trail over the breadth of his shoulders, down his strong arms, his sculpted torso, and settle on his spread thighs, the subtle flex of muscles visible beneath the fabric of his jeans. Each movement, each shift of his body, only serves to deepen the intensity of your attraction to him.

You’re in trouble.

His handsome face holds a certain allure, drawing you in with its rugged charm—especially with those warm eyes and the beautiful facial hair. As you look at him, really take him in, you can’t deny the flutter of arousal stirring deep within you.

A flutter that’s enough to urge your scrambled brain to make a move.

Tommy catches your prolonged stare, and his brows furrow slightly, a hint of curiosity flickering in his eyes. You gather the courage to ask for a sip of his whiskey, unwittingly biting your lip as you wait for his answer.

“Of course, darlin’,” he agrees, leaning in with a broad smile, bringing the glass closer to you.

As your fingers brush against his on the glass, you feel a surge of electricity pass between you. His pupils dilate ever so slightly, his gaze locked onto yours. You take the glass from him, your fingers lingering on his for a moment longer than necessary.

Raising the glass to your lips, you take a slow sip, relishing the smooth warmth of the whiskey as it slides down your throat. Your eyes never leave his as you lick your lips, the gesture not lost on Tommy as he watches you intently.

The flicker of desire in his eyes tells you that he’s captivated by your silent invitation, but as Tommy accepts the glass back, a faint frown tugs at his brow, his expression suddenly tense.

“Darlin’, don’t look at me like that,” he murmurs, his voice husky with restraint.

You raise an eyebrow, feigning innocence as you ask, “Why not?”

“Because,” he breathes out, “it’s making me want to do things I shouldn’t.”

“Hmm, but what if I told you that I want to do those things, too?”

Tommy swallows hard as you scoot closer to him, his eyes never leaving yours. His pulse quickens, evident in the subtle rise and fall of his chest, his mind racing with a thousand thoughts, unsure of what to do or say next.

When your hand lands gently above his knee, his body tenses at your touch. His lips part slightly, as if he’s about to speak, but all he manages is a heavy breath.

“Tell me to stop,” you whisper, your voice barely audible as you lean in slowly, searching his eyes. You can see the conflict raging within him, desire warring with restraint, and you wait for his response.

With a shaky exhale, his gaze drops down to your lips, his entire being filled with longing and uncertainty. But as your palm wanders up his thigh, drawing closer and closer to his growing erection, his resolve begins to crumble like sand underfoot.

Unable to resist any longer, he leans in, closing the distance between you, his lips meeting yours in a tender yet fervent kiss. His hand instinctively finds the back of your neck, his fingers threading through your wet hair as he pulls you closer, deepening the kiss with a quiet urgency.

Feeling you so close, feeling your soft lips against his, he surrenders to the moment, to the sweet sensation of your embrace, letting himself be consumed by the taste of you.

And yet, in the back of his mind, he’s painfully aware of the circumstances of your meeting.

“I don’t think…this…is a good idea,” Tommy mumbles breathlessly against your lips as you whine needily for more.

“I don’t care,” you breathe, pulling back for a moment to hold onto his shoulders and straddle his lap. His cock twitches in his jeans as you scoot forward, your warm core putting delicious pressure on it. Smiling, you put your hands on his chest and lean in to kiss him again. He cups your face with his hands, kissing you back deeply before nudging your nose with his.

You open your eyes and meet his gaze, his pupils so dilated his brown eyes are almost completely black.

“Let me look at you, baby” he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper, sending shivers down your spine. With a smile, you straighten up and place your hands behind you on his thighs, giving him a great view of your spread thighs and torso.

“Is this okay?” Tommy asks softly as he traces your thighs with his palms, his touch sending tingles of anticipation through your body.

You nod your head yes, and his lips curve into a smile as his eyes roam your body and face with adoration. His hands wander over your hips, under the shirt you’re wearing, along your waist and further up, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake.

“You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” he murmurs, his eyes piercing yours as his hands come to rest on your waist.

“I’m sure you say that to every girl willing to sit on your lap,” you tease with a smirk, putting your hands on his chest. You can feel his heartbeat under your palm.

“Yeah, but with you I mean it.” His words carry a weight of sincerity as one hand reaches out to tenderly caress your cheek, while the other glides over the soft skin of your back. “C’mere baby.”

As you lean in, his lips capture yours with an almost desperate hunger, his kiss rough and deep, as if he fears you might vanish if he doesn’t hold onto you tightly enough. His hands glide to your lower back, hovering just above your ass, hesitant to go further yet craving to pull you closer, to feel every inch of you pressed against him, to consume you whole.

“You don’t have to be so gentle. I won’t break,” you say softly, leading his hands down to your ass. You hum in satisfaction as he grabs it, feeling the strain of his arousal against your aching pussy.

“Tommy,” you whine quietly against his lips, begging him to understand how desperately you need him.

Lost in the moment, you both sink deeper into the kiss, the world around you fading away until there’s only the heat of each other’s bodies and the rhythm of your shared desire. Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him closer as his hands roam your back, igniting sparks of pleasure with every touch.

But as the intensity of your kiss grows, so does the weight of uncertainty. Tommy pulls back slightly, his breathing heavy as he searches your eyes for reassurance.

“Are you sure about this?” he whispers. “We don’t have to…”

“I want you, Tommy,” you purr, your eyes glazed.

Your hips rock against him, trying to relieve the tension that has grown between your thighs, eliciting a deep groan from him. His hands move to your waist, helping you grind against him.

“Oh shit,” he pants, reveling in the needy moans leaving your lips. “I don’t wanna hurt you, baby,” he admits with a soft shake of his head, looking at you with wide eyes, still moving you against the bulge in his jeans.

“You’re not gonna hurt me,” you breathe, leaning in to kiss and suck at his sensitive neck, leaving purple marks behind. You feel his grip tighten, his restraint slipping as he responds to your touch with a low groan.

Lost in the overload of sensations—feeling your warm body, your soft lips and wet tongue, your urgent movements on him, hearing your moans and whispered pleas—Tommy is ready to give you what you both want.

But right as he’s opening his belt with deft fingers, he inadvertently turns his head and catches his reflection in the window. Watching you writhe on top of him, clutching his shirt, his own face twisted in ecstasy, a sharp pang of guilt shoots through him.

This isn’t right. He shouldn’t be doing this.

You move to kiss his lips again, but as you do so, you catch the concern in his eyes, and your heart sinks. “Hey,” you whisper, your brow furrowed, an anxious smile on your lips.

Your fingers trail gently through his hair, seeking reassurance, but when his movements cease and his touch withdraws, panic floods your senses.

“No, no please don’t stop,” you beg, your desperation evident in every word. You press against him, your hips moving with urgency, aching for the connection you crave so deeply. “I need you.”

Your hands gently cup his cheeks, your pleading eyes flitting between his.

“Please? Tommy?”

Feeling something bump against your leg, you’re called back to the present.

“Oh, hi there, buddy,” you coo, looking down at the toddler who just faceplanted in front of you. You lean down and offer your hand to help him up. “What are you up to, hm? Just running around?”

He looks up at you with wide eyes, his face breaking into a toothy grin. “You wanna sit up here and wait for your mommy?” You lift him up, putting more pressure on your bandaged hand than you should, and set him down beside you. “Great view, huh?”

He babbles something unintelligible, his little arms flailing as his excited laughter fills the air. “You’re so right, buddy,” you agree, following his gaze to the sparkling blue, “the ocean is beautiful.”

“Benji? Oh, there you are,” a lady in a swimsuit calls out, walking towards you with a relieved smile. “I’m sorry for disturbing you,” she says to you, her tone apologetic. “Benji, how many times have I told you not to run away, hm?”

The toddler giggles in response to his mom’s reproach, his little arms reaching out for her. You can’t help but laugh along with him.

“Think twice before you decide to have kids,” the lady says with a deep sigh, lifting her son onto her hip. “They’re not always as cute as they look.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you chuckle.

“Say bye to the nice lady,” she prompts, her voice warm and gentle.

Benji turns to you, his eyes bright with innocence, and waves enthusiastically with his chubby little hand.

“Bye Benji,” you coo, returning his wave with a big smile, your heart warmed by his adorable gesture.

You sigh and look at your phone. You have two new messages from Tommy.

Maria says she can’t wait to see you tomorrow. And that she’ll personally drag you here if you decide not to show up.

You’re family and there’s nothing you can do to escape us ;)

You swallow hard and can feel your puffy, irritated eyes starting to water behind your black glasses. What the fuck did you ever do in your insignificant life to deserve this kind of love?

Your phone lights up with another text from Tommy.

just accept it <3

You snort and shake your head. You’re so grateful for his friendship. It has changed a lot over the last couple of years, of course it has, especially after he started dating Maria, and more recently since you started…seeing his brother without telling him.

But the fact that you’re still honoring your yearly tradition to have your late-night talk on this very bench, is a testament to the depth of your bond. It’s a cherished ritual, marking the anniversary of your first meeting. You meet here, under the evening sky, exchanging stories and laughter, and indulging in pizza after sunset.

Two years ago, Tommy told you he met someone before you left his apartment the next morning.

“Sweetheart?” “Yeah?” “I, uh, I got something to tell you.” “Shoot.” “I met someone.” Your fingers halt as you’re tying your shoes, the world around you suddenly still as his words sink in. You stare at the floor, tension building in your heart. “We’ve only been on two dates, but I–” “Really like her,” you finish his sentence as you tie the laces into a knot, straighten up and meet his gaze. “Yes.” That’s it, then. You’ve been replaced. “Does that,” you clear your throat that feels incredibly tight now, your voice shaking, “does that mean we can’t hang out anymore?” Tears well up in your eyes as you feel a rush of panic flood through you. You look down and try to blink back the tears threatening to spill over. “Of course not,” Tommy says, his tone gentle yet firm. “Nothing and no one in the world could ever keep me from spending time with you.” “Okay,” you manage to choke out, your voice barely above a whisper as you hastily wipe away a tear with trembling fingers. “I’m sorry for crying, I–I don’t mean to.” “Hey, you don’t need to apologize for that,” Tommy says softly, closing the distance between you two. His hands find their place on your shoulders, offering a gentle squeeze of reassurance. “Darlin’, look at me.” You lift your gaze to meet his, your eyes brimming with fresh tears. “I mean it,” he says with a comforting smile, looking intently into your eyes and cupping your face with his hands. “I promise I’m not going to leave you. I will always be here for you.” You study his face and tell the nagging voice in your mind to shut the fuck up. This is Tommy. He deserves love, he deserves happiness, he deserves someone who can give him everything he wants. And that’s not you. You give him a kiss on the cheek and a sincere smile. “I’m really happy for you, Tommy.”

You did continue spending time together—Tommy kept his word and didn’t abandon you—but as more and more time passed, you would see him less and less as his relationship with Maria deepened.

You expected that to happen, it didn’t hurt any less though.

One year ago, he told you he was going to propose to her, and you spent all night brainstorming ideas on how he could do it. After she’d said yes, they both let you know one day over dinner that they were going to elope, just the two of them, and you were the only person they’d tell beforehand.

A few weeks ago, Tommy beamed with pride as he shared that they were trying for a baby, the twinkle in his eyes warming your heart. Despite the joyous news, you couldn’t resist teasing him for planting that image in your mind.

After you’d shared your stories, and your pineapple and pepperoni pizzas, he very casually asked you if you were seeing anyone, and you said, “No.”

“You’re a horrible liar, darlin’.” “I’m not lying. I don’t like anyone except you.” “Stroking my ego’s not gonna get you off the hook, baby.” “Hmm, I’m pretty sure it’s working though.” “The longer you deny it, the more obvious it gets, you know.” “I’m not seeing anybody, Tommy.” “You really wanna play semantics with me?” “Alright, alright. I guess I’m…kinda seeing someone.” “Why just ‘kinda’? Does the guy not realize what a lucky bastard he is?” “It’s not him. It’s, uh…you know me.” “Yeah, and that’s why I know you’ve caught feelings.” “Ew, don’t say that.” “Well, it’s true. It’s written all over your pretty face.” “You suck, you know that?” “Yeah, it’s part of what makes me so charming. Does he know?” “I dunno, probably not.” “Are you gonna tell him?” “Uhh, I don’t think so.” “Why not? All this time I’ve known you and I’ve never seen you in love before. You can’t just…ignore it.” “Tommy…” “Don’t even try it with the puppy eyes, I’m immune to them.” “Liar.” “Give me one good reason why you shouldn’t tell him.” “Easy. If I never tell him, it’ll never hurt.” “That’s not how it works.” “You just couldn’t let me live happily in my delusions, hm?” “Sweetheart. I know you’re scared, and you have all the reason to, but…sometimes you gotta take a leap of faith, you know?” “I’m not sure I can.” “What does your gut say?” “My gut says he’s too good for me and that he wouldn’t like me if he knew who I really am.” “As someone who does know who you really are, I can assure you that it’s a privilege I wouldn’t miss for the world.” “I just…don’t wanna mess things up, Tommy.” “Look. Nothing lasts, but nothing is lost if you try. Everything changes and everything is alright.” “Wow, that was beautiful…you’re really starting to feel that rum and coke, huh?” “You know I’m right, baby.”

It’s funny, really.

You actually entertained the idea that Tommy might be onto something, that perhaps opening up to Joel could bring some semblance of peace, that perhaps you could be happy together. Yet here you are, back where you started, the familiar ache of loss settling in your heart, whispering that everything is far from alright.

As the sun dips below the horizon, the sky transforming into a canvas of vibrant colors, reflecting off the rippling surface of the water, you take your shoes and socks off. You sink your toes into the soft, grainy sand, relishing its comforting texture.

Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath, allowing the rhythmic sound of the waves to soothe your racing thoughts. With each exhale, you remind yourself that you’re safe, embracing the tranquility of the moment as the colors of the sunset dance across your eyelids.

You feel grounded, peaceful, almost—

“Hi, darlin’.”

“Jesus, you scared me,” you startle with a gasp, snapping back to reality as Joel’s voice unexpectedly breaks the silence.

“I’m so sorry, I thought you saw me,” he says with an apologetic smile on his lips, his big puppy eyes looking puppier than ever.

You sigh exasperatedly and take off your sunglasses. “I didn’t.”

“I’m sorry,” he begins, his words stumbling over each other, “I didn’t mean to intrude, I just...I thought I–I mean, I wanted to...”

“Joel,” you interrupt him, too exhausted—physically and emotionally—to beat around the bush. “What are you doing here?”

His brow furrows slightly and his heart plummets as he sees your bleary eyes, a pang of concern settling heavily in his stomach. “I wanted to see you, darlin’,” he confesses softly.

Your gaze sharpens with curiosity and suspicion as you ask, “But how did you know I was gonna be here? And can you please sit down? You’re making me nervous.”

Joel hesitates for a moment, then sits down beside you, his movements cautious as if afraid to spook you. With a nervous glance in your direction, he clears his throat, his voice low and hesitant.

“I, uh,” he begins, his words faltering slightly, “I went to your place after work to see if you’d maybe talk to me in person. But you weren’t there. And then I went to your office to see if you were working late, but I saw Kristen and she said it was your day off. You could have been anywhere at that point, so I went to Tommy’s and…told him.”

His eyes flit between yours, anxiously searching for your reaction.

You blink slowly, processing Joel’s words with a sense of resignation rather than shock. A heavy sigh escapes your lips as you realize that, at this point, nothing surprises you anymore. With a tired nod, you acknowledge Joel’s actions, feeling too drained to muster any significant reaction.

“How’d he take it?” you ask quietly.

Joel exhales deeply, a wry smile on his lips. “He isn’t too happy with me right now, but I think he’ll get over it.”

“Hm.”

“Darlin’, I’m sorry,” he says, his voice wavering with emotion. “I know you probably don’t want to see me right now, but after last night, I just…I couldn’t bare the thought of you not knowing how much you mean to me.”

As Joel speaks, you keep your gaze averted, unable to meet his eyes, your focus fixed on the sand beneath your feet. You hear every word he says, each one echoing in the silence between you, your heart pounding in your chest. Despite your reluctance to face him, Joel’s unwavering gaze remains fixed on you, his eyes silently pleading for understanding.

In the midst of the tense silence, a sudden clarity washes over you, and your heart speaks before your mind can catch up. Just as Joel opens his mouth to apologize again and explain further, you interject with your own question, the words tumbling out softly into the stillness.

“Do you ever feel like there’s something missing...like a piece of your heart is somewhere else? And no matter what you do, you’re always gonna be incomplete?”

You meet Joel’s gaze, your eyes searching his, peering into his soul with a vulnerability that lays bare your deepest feelings.

“I don’t feel like that when I’m with you,” you whisper.

Joel’s brows furrow in a mixture of surprise and tenderness as your words sink in. His lips part slightly, his expression softening with understanding as he processes the weight of your confession.

“Would you, um,” you clear your throat, “would you hold my hand and just sit with me for a bit?”

Joel’s eyes beam with adoration as he gently envelops your hand that’s clutching your shirt, delicately prying it away and intertwining his fingers with yours. With a soft, reassuring smile, he places your entwined hands on his thigh, the warmth of his touch seeping into your skin.

As you both gaze out at the vast expanse of the water, the waves lapping against the shore in a mesmerizing dance, you feel a sense of peace settle over you like a warm blanket.

You still carry the weight of unresolved issues and uncertainties in your heart, acknowledging that they loom on the horizon, demanding attention. But for now, they can wait.

Your hand in Joel’s feels right, and in this shared moment right here, that’s enough.

Thank you for reading! 🤍

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honeybubblegumpink · 1 year

Text

"𝙷𝚎𝚢 𝚔𝚒𝚍 ! " | Gojo satoru

Summary : reader was enjoying the festival with her bf but got dumped last minute they where supposed to meet. On the vergere of tears she is met with a rude kid .

Gojo : 12 years old reader: 16 years old

Note: pure fluff, slight cursing , not proof read

"Let's break up "

That was the last sentence you ex-boyfriend said before hanging up on you. You where waiting for him about an hour and a half for your boyfriend now ex-boyfriend.

" well this sucks..." You thought tears started to fall down you cheeks

" wow what a loser." A voice said , You turned your head to see a kid with snowy white hair and ocean like eyes,probably around 10 years old looking at you, eating a dango

" what the hell do you know kid! " you yelled at him pissed that he just called you a loser when you just got dumped

" probably more then you " he said while chewing

" like hell, you not even old enough to date ! " you said angrily

" And what's your problem anyway, kid! " you said hands on your hip glaring at him. He shrugged throwing the dango stick behind him and puts his hands in his pockets .

" this kid..." You sigh putting your hand on your forehead.

" I'm 12 years old I'm not a kid. My name is satoru. Gojo satoru " he introduced himself. Which you just look at him confused

" uhm this if the part where you introduced back , stupid "

" what makes you think I wanna introduced myself to a brat like you?" you said " and where are you parents anyway " looking around the crowded people. Maybe he's lost?

" they're always busy." He said looking down

" they are never around that much. To be honest I don't even think they're my parents as they are just strangers to me " he then looked up , you follow his gazes at a family of three .

" oh what should I be saddened by your story or something " you said crossing your arm while rolling your eyes.

" that's why your boyfriend dumped you , because loving you is like loving a block of ice . " gojo comment

" why you little shit " you grab his head and ruffled his hair( which was surprisingly fluffy) creating full of knots .

If you had to be honest it was a bit sad that he didn't get any attention from his parents. And he most be the only child since he didn't mention any siblings

" get your hands off of me " gojo complained which you just continue to do so to his dismay.

You eventually let him go which he just muttered " crazy bitch-"

" finished that sentence and you'll see what happens to you "

" no you can't " you yelled back at him

" why not " gojo pouted

" you already had two of them "you argue with the kid

" well it's not my fault they made it taste so good " he argued back

" no is no and that's final. "

" please, y/n? " he pleads with giving you the puppy eyes

" I said no."

You and the kid end up spending your time together at the festival. Since your ex boyfriend won't be showing shop and gojo parents doesn't have time .

" hey, let's try that one! " gojo pointed at the small stand selling some kind of sweets

" 5000 yen?! "You gasp looking at the big bowl of parfait

" you think I'm made of money or something and why do I have to pay for you, kid ?! "

" because I already spend all of mine earlier " he said nonchalantly

" well I'm not buying it."

You end up buying the expensive desert. when he started a tantrum making the people turn around while whisper and look at you.

You sigh and looked at the kid next to you " I hope your happy because I'm broke now . Thanks to you "

After gojo finish which was Surprisingly way to fast, the fire works started to play. You both watch as the night sky lit up .

You had fun today that the least you expected. Thanks to the kid next to you he took your mind off of your ex boyfriend .

" hey kid " you said softly

" uhm?"

" thanks."

" for what? " he said looking at you confused

" for today " you turn and looked at him smiling while ruffling his hair.

Which made gojo Satoru blush a little

" hey well meet again okay " gojo said all of the sudden . As you guys where about to part ways

" I don't know about that " you said to him

" don't worry we will because you know jujutsu " Your eyes widden in shocked. How does he know? You hid your curse energy from all jujutsu users.

" because I really enjoy spending my time with you too and not alone...." He blush with a pout hating to admit it. Which made your heart warm up a little

" sorry kid but the jujutsu world isn't for me " you bend down, down his level .

" why " gojo frowned

" uhm well I'm kinda really weak " you said in embarrassment, scratch the back of your head

" I'm practically below a 4th grader which I never through was possible . And my curse technique are basically useless. I'll basically die if I was send out for a mission "

" your technique isn't useless if you see it in another light. You think it's useless because none has the same ability as you and because you don't know how to use it " gojo said pocking your forehead

" making origami and making come to live is definitely useless "

" well I'm the strongest. I can protect you " gojo said seriously which made you laugh a little.

" you seriously think so? "

" I'm GOJO satoru. "

Right.. That why the name sounded familiar. He's one of the GOJO clans. The top three most powerful clans of the jujutsu world.

" I possessed the ability of the six eyes and limitless so I can protect you."

" that's very nice of you..kid" you patted his head as he blushes

" so you well west again?" GOJO said with hope in his eyes

" lets let fate decide if we'll meet again okay?"

" well if fate doesn't allow us to meet. I'll find you " gojo said his heart beating a bit to fast for his like. You where a bit dumbfounded by his confession but smile anyway " okay"

[16 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚜 𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛 ]

you heard the door open . You turned around to greet the customer but was met by 6ft tall man with a blindfold, is he blind? You though but he doesn't have a cane.He looks around but stop when he noticed you.

" hello , sir how can I help you? "

" found you. "

" uh...?" You where confused of what he just said. Found me? Since when are we playing hide and seek?

" you don't remember me huh? "

" sorry you most have gotten the wrong person "

" ouch. You wounded me" he said dramatic

" sorry but I've never met you before-" the guy took his blindfold off , revealing his ocean blue eyes . Just like that kid you met years ago . Then it hits you he was that kid !

" no way..."

" I told you I'll find you if fate doesn't was us to meet "

#jujutsu kaisen #gojo fluff #gojo satoru #gojou satoru x you #gojo x reader #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #gojo saturo #jujutsu kaisen satoru #satoru x y/n #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu satoru #jjk satoru

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darkbluekies · 1 year

Text

17:38

Mafia!female!yandere OC x reader

Warnings: knives, blood

Jerry sits by the kitchen island with her phone in her hand. You've asked to cook and usually, she doesn't let you, but today she's feeling bold. What could go wrong when she's supervising?

"What are you making?" she asks without looking up from her phone.

"Kimchi."

Jerry puts down her phone and smiles. She crosses her arms over her chest and leans over the table.

"No way, my mom used to make that for me when I was a kid", she smiles sadly.

"I thought that I wanted to try to make it for you", you say.

"You're so sweet, baby. Go wild. Let's see how good of a housewife you are." She tilts her head. "You'd be a pretty cute housewife, wouldn't you?"

"Why are you asking me that? Shouldn't you know?"

Jerry grins slightly. "I think you'd be a very cute housewife."

You pick up the cabbage and wash it thoroughly. Jerry let you come with her to the store to buy it, surprisingly enough. She was very stiff, always glancing around to make sure no one was looking at you weirdly.

You pick up a knife and position it over the cabbage. There's no way you can ferment the entire thing in one piece.

"So that's why you wanted to buy so many spices", Jerry thinks out loud.

"It wasn't too expensive, right?" you ask over your shoulder. "We bought quite a lot."

"Nah, and even if it was, I can get money easily. Don't worry. You should have gotten yourself that ice machine you saw."

"It was too expensive."

"But you'd have ice right now, wouldn't you?"

Jerry raises her eyebrows teasingly. You shake your head disapproving and turn back to your cutting. The wet cabbage becomes an ice rink and the knife slips, cutting your ring finger just over the final rinkle. You gasp in pain.

"What?" Jerry asks quickly, all hints of amusement gone. "Did you cut yourself?"

"Yes", you hiss, holding your hurt hand in your free one. "I'm bleeding."

Jerry shoots up from her chair quick enough for it to tumble back, down on the floor. She hurries over to you and inspects the hurt area.

"Shit, baby, you have to be careful!" she exclaims and pulls your hand over to the sink.

The cold water rinses the wound, causing you to hiss again. Jerry's heart is thumping in her chest. How could she ever think that this was a good idea?

"Stand still", she tells you. "I'll go get a bandaid for you."

She runs into the bathroom and comes back a minute later with a beige band aid in her hands. She removes the plastic layer and wraps it gently around your ring finger. Carefully, she lifts your fingers to her plump lips and kisses it softly.

You look at the cabbage.

"Don't think about it", Jerry tells you. "You're not going to continue. This was a stupid idea. Why did I ever think it was okay for you to use a knife? I trust you too much. Fuck sake. You hurt yourself. Get out of the kitchen."

"It's just a little cut …", you say. "I wanted to make something special for you. I had it all planned …"

She cups your cheeks between her hands.

"I know, baby", she says comfortingly. "And I'm very grateful that you wanted to do something for me, but what kind of girlfriend am I if I let you get hurt, hm? My number one priority is to protect you."

"I know, but …"

"I'll continue this. Go sit down in the living room. People like you shouldn't be allowed into kitchens."

You sigh and leave for the living room. The very second you round the corner, Jerry bites down on her hand, grunting. She feels so bad.

Nonetheless, she finishes what you've started. She looks at the prepared kimchi with a sigh. You're too good for her. You wanted to make one of her childhood side dishes … for what? To make her happy? Why do you care about her happiness after what she's done to you? Jerry shuts her eyes to stop whatever tears want to escape.

"Stop it", she hisses for herself, pressing her palms to her eyes. "Stop fucking crying, you piece of shit."

She gathers herself and cleans up. You look up when she enters the living room.

"I don't want you in the kitchen again", she says monotonously. "Do you get that?"

"It was just an accident, Jerry", you sigh. "The knife slipped. The cabbage was wet and slippery. There will be accidents while cooking … you know that."

She shakes her head firmly. "Not in my house. You're not allowed anywhere near anything sharp. You're too clumsy."

You're about to talk back, but keep your mouth shut, knowing better than to argue with her when she's angry.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere imagines #yandere drabbles #yandere oc x you #yandere mafia #yandere fics #yandere stories #yandere oc x reader #female yandere #yandere drabble

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wriothesleybear · 8 months

Text

Flirting with Gallagher as he makes you a drink.

~a/n: flirting, mentions of alcohol, mentions of kissing, slightly flirty!Gallagher, flirty!fem!reader.

Watching him and noticing how focused Gallagher gets when creating signature drinks. Getting mesmerized by his expert movements as he pours the right amount of liquor into the glass. He can feel your eyes on him. He looks up, meeting your eyes. "Is it that interesting to watch me make drinks?" You smile. "Would you prefer I look out the window and focus on the view of the city instead?" Knowing your eyes are watching him as he works, he won't admit that it makes him a bit nervous. A part of him wants to impress you, but it's sort of hard for him not to get nervous when your beautiful, intense eyes follow his every move. But he wouldn't want your gaze to be anywhere other than on him, which he wouldn't tell you. "Which ever you prefer. It's your choice."

"I do admit that the view of the city and its bright lights is an exquisite view, but I think the view of you is even more mesmerizing." Your confession catches him off guard, causing him to accidentally spill some liquor. You smile to yourself at his reaction. He clears his throat as he cleans up his mess. "If you're flirting with me just to get a free drink, it's not working." You fake a disappointed pout. "Aw really? What a shame. I thought my plan was working." Finishing the drink off with a garnish, he places it in front of you. "Nice try." Smiling, you grab the glass, bringing it to your lips. You pause before taking a sip. "What if i gave you a kiss? Would that at least get me a discount?" He keeps a straight face, pretending to be unfazed by your flirty comments. "Do you say that to all the bartenders?"

"Nope. Only with you, my favorite bartender." The corner of his mouth slightly raises. "I suppose I should feel honored then." Smirking at him, you rest your chin on the back of your hand and slightly tilt your head at him. "You should be very honored." The bar's clock rings, indicating it's closing time. You're surprised it's that late, not noticing how fast time flew by while chatting with Gallagher. Swallowing the rest of your drink, you hop off of the bar stool, taking out some money from your purse to pay for the drink. "Don't worry about it. It's on me." He says while cleaning a glass. You're surprised for a second, but soon a smile graces your features. "Was my flirting that effective to persuade you to change your mind about that free drink?"

"Possibly. But you should know by now that you don't have to sweet talk me into giving you a free drink. I'm more than happy to give you as many drinks as you like. After all, you are my favorite customer." His words cause a blush to cover your cheeks. Your eyes slightly widen, surprised by his sudden confession. He smirks, enjoying the look on your face, satisfied that he's the one making you flustered this time. "W-well, thanks for the drink Gallagher. Another delicious recipe." You stutter out as you try to calm your racing heart. "I'll see you next time." You turn for the door, but he suddenly stops you. "Let me walk you home. It wouldn't be right to let a lady walk home alone this late at night."

He holds the door open for you. Smiling, you thank him, but you can't help yourself from teasing him. "What a gentleman. A free drink and a strong, handsome man to make sure I get home safely. How should I repay you?" Putting your finger on your chin, you think about how to repay him. "Hmm, how about a kiss on the cheek?" "You don't have to return the favor. Just doing my job."

"But it wouldn't be fair to not give my thanks when you've done this much for me. Unless, this is your plan all along just for me to give you a kiss." He chuckles. "Seems I've been caught." He teases, playing along. You both arrive to your home, stopping on your door step. "Well, you should know by now that I'm more than happy to give you a kiss." Getting on your tip toes, you peck his cheek, once again thanking him and saying your goodbyes before closing your front door. Gallagher smiles to himself, replaying the feel of your lips on his cheek as he heads back to the bar. Little does he know, your lipstick left a mark on his cheek.

#gallagher x reader #gallagher headcanons #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail headcanons #hsr x reader #hsr headcanons #gallagher

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ultralightpoe · 1 year

Text

Midnight Rain - Jamie Tartt

Authors Note: I have been trying to find any sort of energy to post and get out of bed. Got so close to giving up on life itself and I'm barely back, please bare with me as I try to find my way out of my depression hole I have dug for myself everyone. I know it's been a minute but life has been kicking my ass. Be patient with me - Ultralight

Word Count: 4274

Warnings: slight angst

Apart of my MIDNIGHTS EVENT. (Next Event is Sour by Olivia Rodrigo. Requests closed. Event following yet to be decided)

SOUR EVENT

MAIN MASTERLIST

Enjoy!

Rain, he wanted it comfortable

I wanted that pain

He wanted a bride

I was making my own name

Chasing that fame

He stayed the same

All of me changed like midnight

It was an odd thing, falling for a famous person with everyone watching you both, it felt like every private moment had been laid bare to the world for them to mock and laugh at. There was nothing normal about it.

But then again there was nothing normal about the way you and Jamie Tartt had met.

You thought of this as you left the Richmond Stadium, glasses covering your eyes as you did your best to hide your face from the flashes, your bodyguard holding the small of your back as he pushed you forward.

“Just a few more steps until we are in the car.” He informs, blocking a poster from being shoved into your face.

By the time you are shoved into the air conditioned car you risk a look back at him, and this is the moment all the paparazzi catch a picture of your tear stained face.

You wish this had never happened.

“I just don’t understand.” You whine, eyes cast up to the ceiling of the building, swirling in the chair as your manager tapped her pen on the desk in front of you with an unamused expression. “I didn’t do anyth-”

“YOU WERE CAUGHT MAKING OUT WITH YOUR COSTAR!”

“......And?”

“HE WAS MARRIED!” In your defense he had never mentioned his wife and how the hell were you supposed to know? He never wore a ring, he was always in costume and character so it wasn’t like you had talked about his family at all.

That being said, you felt horrible when you found out, and then your surprised face had been printed onto every magazine and gossip site known to man, which made you look like the homewrecker and him like the lost puppy husband. What a scuffing tool.

“So what on earth does this have to do with Jamie Tartt?” You had never heard of him before, not that you were a football fan in general, but you did kind of recognize him from some cheap reality show.

“He is looking for a change in image, a happy healthy family image.” Your manager explains.

“So you want me to be his pretty little wife?” You snark, lifting your voice until you're whispering like a 50’s pinup girl and batting your eyelashes at her. “Should I make him dinner every night and kiss him sweetly-”

“How many job offers have you gotten lately?” She snaps, slamming your gossip mags on the desk in front of her.

She had you there, since he had played victim you had close to no job offers, your image had been destroyed by that pompous man.

So it seemed Jamie Tartt was your only option. You would play the role of your sweet girl.

My town was a wasteland

Full of cages, full of fences

Pageant queens and big pretenders

But for some, it was paradise

Your face was printed everywhere by the next morning and Jamie Tartt couldn’t help but try and throw as many of the magazines and papers away during his early morning jog with Roy.

“The fuck are you doing?” Kent snaps, crossing his arms, his back straight and his eyebrows pinched.

“I don’t fuckin’ know mate!” Jamie snaps, face bunched up as he panics, the stack of papers in his hands heavier than he thought when he makes eye contact with your photo. You looked so sad he felt his heart shatter. “I jus’ don’ want any of these fucks seein her like this, ya know?”

“Everyone has phones.” His running partner points out and Jamie sighs of disbelief. “Come on, you massive twat.”

With that Roy starts running again and Jamie is forced to drop the magazines in the trash, picking up his speed to catch up with his coach, heart racing against his ribs.

After this he would call you, maybe try to clear the air. After everything you both went through he was sure you would at least want to talk to him……right?

“So…..I just go to the restaurant…..for the date you set up for me?” Jamie asks, confusion laced in his tone as he stares at his ex girlfriend and now his social media manager. “I just don’t get it Keeley.”

“It’s not something you get, ya?” She smiles, rubbing his shoulders. “Just trust me Jamie, I think she will be good for ya.”

“And she’s interested in me?” There was a small excitement in his chest now, the feeling of being adored always enough to boost his ego. “Then I think I can give this a chance, ya?”

So he did give you a chance, he showed up (late) wearing simple workout gear and asking the host about your reservation. She gives him a disgusted up and down look before side-eying him as she points to a table in the far back.

You were there, your nose in a book, and not caring about anyone else in the restaurant. And he instantly knows he should have dressed up more, he figured you would be some fangirl and would like him as he is. But now he sees that he looks like a massive twat who showed up late and not dressed up at all.

“Y/n?” He asks slowly, reaching a hand up to fix his hair subconsciously. Nerves were getting the best of him and when you finally looked up he could not think straight, let alone breathe. It’s like life stopped short. “Holy shit.”

“Yeah? Jamie Tartt I presume?” You ask and he can do nothing but nod. “Why don’t you sit, the paps are going to be here in no time.”

“Paps?” He asks, lunging to sit in front of you, fixing his hair once more.

“They follow everywhere. I haven’t ordered yet, even though you were late.”

“Right. Yeah. Thank you for waitin’.”

My boy was a montage

A slow-motion, love potion

Jumping off things in the ocean

I broke his heart 'cause he was nice

He had been one of the sweetest fake dates you’d ever had in your career, and for a couple minutes you wondered if it was a real date, only to laugh it off as a camera flash caught him in the middle of a dramatic retelling. You had to remind yourself that night that it was fake. It was all fake.

But the kiss you gave him outside the restaurant felt more real than anything else you had felt before, and when you had pulled away your hands were shaking. But he simply smiled and kissed your cheek before disappearing.

You had exchanged numbers that night, so you wouldn’t have to go through your managers everytime you needed to meet. And that had worked well for the first 2 weeks.

He had gone from making you laugh at coffee to texting you at 3 am. And though you had a red flag in your mind about the professional boundary you ignored it because why not? If you were forced to fake date someone then why not have fun?

But now you sat in your empty apartment, legs pulled into your chest as you sobbed, wondering why on earth you had crossed the professional boundary.

Your phone rang somewhere behind you and a part of you wanted to dive to answer it, already knowing it would be him. But you drew the line in the sand, why run to the water to drown yourself now?

So instead you pulled your throw blanket over yourself and let the world wash away.

“Is there a reason you called me this early?” You laugh, pulling your coat closer around you as you meet him at the side entrance of the Richmond field. “And when will the paps get here?”

“They won’t be.” He looks proud to say that, excitement crossing his face as he reaches for your hand. “I figured you had enough of them so I’ll sneak ya in.”

His hand finds your own and you are filled with the same warmth of the night you kissed him so you follow him without questions. And he seems ten times happier to lead you to the main field.

“Okay so there are sooo many rules about being on the field, it’s a bit of bad luck yeah? So don’t tell anyone you were here.” He rambles as you look around before pulling out a ball from his backpack.

“Oh, what on earth is that?”

“It’s a football?” He laughs, throwing it at you which makes you scream and hit it. It bounces off his forehead with a thud that has you gasping.

“Oh my goodness I am so sorry about th-” But he merely laughs.

“I said a football not a handball!”

“You mean a volleyball.”

“A what?”

“Why am I here?” You interrupt, leaning to touch his forehead where the ball hit.

“I was hoping I can teach ya to play.” He blushes when he says it and for a second you are not Y/n L/n international actress, you are Y/n L/n, dumbass in a soccer field.

So you spend the night running around the field with Jamie as he teaches you tips and tricks of the game, you are sweating and laughing.

Then he slips and falls harshly and you are a goner, holding your stomach as you fall over him, cackling.

“You’re a traitor!” He laughs, catching you before you hit the grass and leaning to tickle you. This ends up being a small wrestling match and by the time it’s over you are both laying in the grass, your head on his chest and staring up at the sky.

“This was fun.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. I am really thankful I picked the call up.” You giggle, looking up to him and before you know it you are leaning up to kiss him. And just as the first time you are left breathless and shaking. Then he smiles at you and there is a red flag once more. But you don’t listen.

“You wanna come back to my place?”

He was sunshine, I was midnight rain

He wanted it comfortable

I wanted that pain

He wanted a bride

I was making my own name

Chasing that fame

He stayed the same

All of me changed like midnight

“I just don’t understand, yeah?” He rants, walking back and forth in the coaches office as all five of the men stare at him with odd expressions. “Like I woulda understood if she just told me it was a public stunt-”

“Ah, I see your dilemma here young pup-” Ted starts, only to be interrupted by Beard and Higgins howling while Roy and Trent both stay silent. “It seems to me like you had some deep feelings for this girl….like, oo oh come on fellas help me out here-”

“Love is dead.” Roy supplies.

“Beats me.” Trent shrugs.

“I’m blanking-” Beard panics.

“LUKE AND LEIA!” Higgins rushes only for beard and Ted to turn on him slowly.

“You ever seen those movies, Higgins?” Ted asks slowly, and everyone in the room stops.

“No….No sir.But I know they kiss.” He smiles and Ted nods. “Watch em and then get back to me.”

“Will do, sir.”

“Will you blokes help me?!” Jamie snaps and they all turn back to him. “She won’t even pick up her fucking phone.”

“Well……” Roy grunts and everyone sits up.

“Oh boy, Roy is about to open up. Buckle in.” Ted giggles.

“I think if you truly love the lass then you should be Jamie about it and go do what Jamie does.”

“And what does Jamie do?!”

Weeks and weeks of this, dates at restaurants and secret dates away from the paps that relentlessly followed you, and then he would spend the night with you in your apartment. Which was never a requirement but gee what a bonus because you managed to take his breath away with every kiss.

One tug and his soul is gone, one bite and he is swearing himself to you.

But his favorite moments between the two of you were when he was laying in your bed, the sunlight streaming through your curtains as you kissed your way up his back to wake him up. In this room you never had that actress pretense you swore by, in this room you were just Y/n. Queen of his heart.

“I think it’s time to wake up.” You whisper, nipping at his ear as he smiles.

“Or we can just sleep in…..” He offers.

“You have a huge game today, and I have my first session on my new film.”

“A new film?”

“Yeah! I’m playing the love interest, a bit weird when I have to kiss someone dressed as an alien but who am-”

“So you’ll be kissing someone then?”

“Well acting…. Just like the sex scene is acting and this relationship is-” You are cut off by the sound of his phone ringing but something in his ears screeches.

It came like a postcard

Picture perfect, shiny family

Holiday, peppermint candy

But for him it's every day

You were right back where you started, swirling in your manager's chair as she glared at you, only this time you felt like there was a gaping hole in your chest that you couldn’t seem to fill. This entire idea had been a mistake.

“You are right back where you started, but with ANOTHER SCANDAL!” Your manager shouts, slamming the pen onto the table and reaching to grab the tabloids laid to the side. You didn’t bother to look since you already knew what would be plastered all over them.

You were now not only known as the woman who cheated on Jamie fucking Tartt but you were the reason the team lost their game. You were bad luck.

A whore. A homewrecker. A lame actress. A waste of space……. But those were just the things that Jamie had said. The public had many many more things to say about it all.

Your heart stung at the thought of him, trying your best to erase the image of him as tears sprung in your eyes, picking up your stuff as fast as you can before you storm out.

You didn’t need to be told what a fuck up this was, you already knew it.

“So… the other day, when we were lying in bed?” Jamie starts, leaning against the wall of the coffee shop as he stares into your eyes, letting you play with the zipper of his jacket. Your back was pressed to the wall as he covered you from the paps, all that could be seen was your legs and at this moment you couldn’t be more happy.

You, as much as you hate to admit it, loved hanging out with Jamie when it wasn’t a performance.

“You mean when you forgot your underwear in a rush to leave?” You tease, enjoying the nervous look that crosses his face.

“Well, you said something that just…. It made me nervous, yeah?”

“What made you nerv-”

“JAMIE!” A voice calls, breaking you both out of the small trance that had built up between you, both of you taking a step back from each other. You keep a hand on his chest, his own flies up to keep it there as he smiles at the man who interrupted you both. “DANNY ROJAS!”

“Oy, keep it down, Mate!” Jamie laughs, pulling you to the man dancing. “Danny this is Y/n, Y/n this is Danny.”

“Wonderful to meet you-”

“You coming to the game?” Danny asks, face filled with excitement. For a moment you want to say no, there was no need for a public appearance at his game, but then you look to see the hopeful expression on Jamie’s face and you feel yourself smiling.

“If handsome is okay with me going?” You ask, eyes not leaving Jamie. He gets excited, rushing forward to kiss your cheek.

“I’ll save you a seat!”

So I peered through a window

A deep portal, time travel

All the love we unravel

And the life I gave away

Jamie found himself running the next morning, thinking about what fucking Kent had said. “Jamie Tartt would fuck it all up of course.”

Fuck it up? Roy Kent is saying he would fuck it up? That wanker didn’t know anything at all, and Jamie would never fuck it up.

But then he finds himself at your doorway, sweaty and nervous as he tries to figure out how the hell he got here. Fuck fuck fuck.

Just as he goes to dash off the door swings open, revealing your tear streaked face staring right at him.

“What are you doing here?”

“I have no fucking clue.” He blurts, hands flying up like you are about to swing at him. But you don’t, you merely stare at him as he stares back with a heavy heart. “But I am here…..and I’d love to talk.”

You were thrilled, looking around the stadium with wide eyes as everyone cheered for Jamie. You had seen this man in his element many times, you knew he loved the game but you had never seen him in his element surrounded by his fans.

This was one heck of a thrill.

He was cheering with them, and yelling, and honestly just owning the field (or Pitch as the coach had explained). You could do nothing but watch in amazement as the two females beside you cheered them on as well.

But that’s when things started to go sideways.

You had just been cheering Jamie on, jumping up in your seat when he made the goal, when you saw your old co-star from the corner of your eye. The pompous asshole that forgot to mention he was married. Within a second of making eye contact he was nodding his head, moving closer to you, mumbling out excuse me’s to book it to you.

For an instant you think of telling him to piss off, but for some reason you didn’t want the group of people you were sat with to realize that you were a homewrecker, whether you meant to or not that's embarrassing. So you let the panic get the better of you and dash to meet him halfway, tugging on his jacket to drag him up the stairs.

“What the fuck are you doing-” You start to ask, anger coursing through your veins but when you whirl to glare at him his hands are on your jaw pulling you in for a swift kiss as cameras click in the background.

In a moment of panic you gasp out, only to swing your hand quickly so slap his face harshly. The sound rings out in the hallway followed by multiple ‘oohs’ as you twist to walk away quickly.

But the damage had been done already, and twitter was on the jump already.

'Cause he was sunshine

I was midnight rain

He wanted it comfortable

I wanted that pain

He wanted a bride

I was making my own name

Chasing that fame

He stayed the same

All of me changed

Like midnight

You watch him in amazement for a moment, eyebrows raised while you tried to process the words he just said. He stares back for a moment, tilting his head while he waits for your response, but you can’t think of a single thing to say.

“I think we already said enough,” You start, wrapping your arms around yourself while he shuffles uncomfortably.

“No, Y/n let’s just-”

“Jamie, just drop it. We both already said what we had to.” You mumble, attempting to close the door before his foot catches in it and he huffs in pain.

“Just….. Five minutes, that’s all I need.”

“.......Fine,” You sigh, opening the door and letting him in.

“Um- what the actual fuck?!” Jamie snaps, coming around the corner his phone glued in his hand as he glared at you. “You mind tellin me why the fuck you were lockin’ lips with that wanker?!”

“Wait, it’s not what it looks like-” You start, but he is too mad, sneering at you when you try to reach for him.

“So you weren’t actin’ like a whore with a man while I was playing my game?!”

“Excuse me?” The feeling of panic vanishes, replaced by another wave of anger as his words settle in. “Coming from the dumbass that was in Love Island?”

“It was Love Conquers All, I’ll have ya know!” He scoffs.

“Not to mention I don’t owe you anything! THIS IS A PR STUNT!” You shout, not caring at the amount of paps that were beginning to swarm.

“A pr stunt?” He asks, face falling as he looks at you. “You mean to tell me that you have been dating me for-”

“Pr. Yes. This entire thing has been PR. Did you not know that?” That laugh that slips from your lips is bitter, eyes welling up with tears. Dear god, did no one tell him?

“Right, so this entire time I have been used by a lame ass actress? You been using my fame to get roles? Is that it?”

“More like I have been using you to clean up my image after….”

“RIGHT! Sleeping with a married man-”

“He didn’t tell me he was married!”

“YOU COULD HAVE SEARCHED IT UP! BUT YOU HAD TO BE A HOMEWRECKER!”

“YOU ARE A NATIONAL SOCCER SLUT!”

“IT’S FOOTBALL!”

Rain, he wanted it comfortable

I wanted that pain

He wanted a bride

I was making my own name

Chasing that fame

He stayed the same

All of me changed

Like midnight

You watch him shuffle across your living room, jumping up and down on the balls of his feet as he tried to talk himself up, breathing out slowly as he turns to face you.

“I have never been good with this whole….feelin’ thing. But then I met you and for a moment I thought I had it, you know? I thought I was gonna get the life with the girl that loved me because everytime I was near ya my heart started cracking through my fuckin’ ribcage.” He begins, rubbing the back of his neck. “Then you are tellin’ me that it was all fake-”

“It wasn’t all fake.” You whisper and he sucks in a breath.

“It wasn’t?”

“No, I wouldn’t have slept with you if it was.” You scoff, rolling your eyes.

“I’m sorry for what I said.”

“Me too.”

“I….. I want it to be real.” He admits, taking a step closer. “I know it was all fake……now I do. But I want this.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re the wind beneath my fucking wings!” He smiles, moving until his hands are on your shoulders. “You make my heart race and you are the only one on this earth that doesn’t seem to mind my massive fuck ups. I fall in front of ya so many times a day, and you’ve seen me flex in a circus mirror and get frustrated and you have seen me-”

“I get it.” You smile.

“Please, Y/n, just give me a chance back. Let’s make this real.”

“But it might not-”

“We can make it work! If you can learn football then we can make this work.”

You stare at him, and he stares back. For a moment he thinks you are going to say no, and he begins backing up until you nod.

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah.” You nod. “Okay.”

I guess sometimes we all get

Just what we wanted, just what we wanted

And he never thinks of me

Except when I'm on TV

From that point on there was a stark difference between the actress you and the real you. Actress you kissed handsome men on screen and ended up in a tabloid once a week, accusing you of vile things.

Real you, well real you ate gummy worms in bed with your charming husband that loved hearing all the rumors, reading through them and acting them out like a fake fight. You went to all his games, he showed up to all of your premieres.

Sunshine and rain mixed into a storm of chaos that both of you loved.

I guess sometimes we all get

Some kind of haunted, some kind of haunted

And I never think of him

Except on midnights like this (midnights like this)

“Are ye ready yet?” He calls, laying on the couch as he watched the screen before him, laughing a bit when he sees Nate the Great slip on camera.

“No, I am not!” You snap, rushing into the living room in a panic, searching around. He picks his head up to watch you, laughing a little when you trip over the rug. “What are you lookin’ for?”

“My heels!”

“You are wearin heels to a concert you’ll be jumpin around at?”

“They complete the outfit.” You sigh, watching a smile break across his face.

“No, lovey, your gorgeous tits complete the outfit!”

“OH YOU PIG-” He laughs as you move to throw something at him, dashing to chase you back. You scream out, dashing up the steps to avoid his clutch as he chases you around the house.

The next morning you both wake up to the headlines “Football star and movie star late for T Swift concert!”

“Is this all they have time for?” He asks, yawning a bit as you laugh.

“Apparently.”

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atiny-piratequeen · 9 months

Text

𝓝𝓮𝓰𝓸𝓽𝓲𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼

𓆩⟡𓆪Summary:

When two rival kingdoms send their men to you to ask for your hand in marriage to bridge the gap between kingdoms, you have a quite...unique way of getting everyone to cum together.

Errr, come together.

Nah, it was right the first time.

𓆩⟡𓆪Pairing: Lee Juyeon (The Boyz) x Fem! Reader x Jeong Yunho (Ateez)

𓆩⟡𓆪Genres/Aus: Non-Idolverse, Royal AU, Hybrids (Snow Leopard, Netherlands Dwarf Rabbit, and African Wild Dog, Respectively), Smut, Poly Endgame

𓆩⟡𓆪Tws: Swearing, Insults

𓆩⟡𓆪Sws: Consensual Chase Kink, Pred/Prey Undertones, Size Difference (Reader is smaller than the boys. And if you aren't irl, guess what? You are now. Live your smol dreams babes), Teasing, Blowjobs, Handjobs, Breast Play, Unprotected Sex, Fingering, Cum Swallowing, Marking, Riding, Anal (mxm), hints of Scent Kinks, Stomach Bulge, Slicking, mentions of ruts/heats

𓆩⟡𓆪Rating: Explicit/Mature (18+)

𓆩⟡𓆪WC: 3.7k

𓆩⟡𓆪A/n: Im a damn day late but here is my Secret Santa '23 entry for @cultofdionysusnet for, ironically, my darling Jasper (@starlitmark)

I was already like WOAH when I got you as my receiver but I think its pretty dope you also were my secret Santa *wheeze* I hope you like it, even if it's late.

𓆩⟡𓆪AO3| Taglist Form (Please make sure your urls are updated and able to actually be tagged) | Commission Sheet𓆩⟡𓆪

𓆩⟡𓆪Network Ping- @kwritersworld | @kdiarynet | @k-vanity | @cultofdionysusnet𓆩⟡𓆪

“You and I will not be seeing eye to eye on this. I arrived first, I asked for her hand first, and I will not bow down to some… dog .”

An audible growl filled the room, a reverb as the man across the way’s lip finally curled up.

“I’ve listened to you hiss and spit nonsense at me for half an hour, if you’d like to do more than that, I’d be more than happy to entertain that, but if all you intend on doing is make cheap shot swipes at me, it's obvious who it is she should choose to take her hand.”

You sit with your ankles crossed, your hands in your lap, watching the two men bicker at one another.

The first man is Juyeon, sent from the land of Lucid Dream. It was a place born of ice and snow, it seemed fitting that their Crown Prince was a snow leopard, his speckled tail twitching in agitation as he glared down his much bigger rival.

This being Yunho, an African wild dog sent from the kingdom of Eternal Sunshine, who stood taller than Juyeon, stared him down with an unimpressed stare, his ears, also spotted, flicking to and fro as he made steadfast eye contact with the two of them.

“Milady, I don’t think this one is going well. I don’t know how the meetings got mixed up like this-probably Donghyuck again-but I can escort them out immediately if you would like to. Before things get too…rowdy?” your consultant whispers beside you, eyes flicking back and forth between the two apex hybrids.

You hum, your nose twitching slightly.

They both smelled quite nice. How very coy of their respective Kingdoms to send hopefuls to you that were bordering on their respective ruts.

A smile crosses your face, you stand, and in an instant, both men pause in their arguing, eyes fixed on you.

“Lucid Dream and Eternal Sunshine, long have you two been at odds with one another, no? If my recollection of history goes, your two kingdoms have been in a bitter, decades-long spat with one another, right?” You step down from your post, your hand soft and delicate within your consult’s hand as he assists you.

“Milady-”

“I will be fine, Xiaojun. Tell Mark and Donghyuck to go prepare for me. It won’t take long, I made my decision.”

Xiaojun looked at your small form, pursing his lips in concern. Leaving you, a rabbit, in a room with a wild dog and a snow leopard seemed to be the LAST thing he wanted to do, but a simple quirk of your brow settled any unsaid complaints he had and he merely sighed and nodded, making his way out of the room.

The sound of your heels against the grand marble floors echoes as you make your way to the two of them, without a doubt picking up on the competing pheromones rolling off of them both in waves.

They straighten their backs, looking at you with a noticeably gentler look.

“It will take them some time to prepare my room, I imagine.”

Neither men said anything, though you can see their tails stand still, their ears perked.

The corner of your lips tilt slightly, how cute.

“The two of you can prove yourselves to me in a different way. If my kingdom is to be the bridge, we will do things my way.” you speak slowly, removing your heels and setting them aside. The two men stare, blinking slowly and curiously while you make your way to the door, a smile tugging at your lips as you feel their gaze on your smaller form.

“Let’s see who’s faster.”

You toss the door open, darting down the hall in a flash, and laughing to yourself as you count the seconds it takes before there is an eruption of noise and movement behind you.

You’re grateful for Xiaojun knowing where you were going with your untold portion of your orders to him, as the halls are relatively empty. Any servants mulling about were on alert and the moment they see you rushing down the hall, jovial and full of energy, they press themselves to the wall, keeping themselves there as two blurs rush by moments later.

“Stupid dog, move! She’s mine!” Juyeon rushed by, his eyes narrowed as he followed the scent down the hall. Yunho growled, his legs long and swift, making sure Juyeon did not overtake him in speed.

He wouldn’t lose. Failure was not an option. If the Princess wanted her soon-to-be betrothed to win in a challenge of speed-and if it came down to it, strength-he wouldn’t back down.

Especially not to a trash-talking feline from their rival kingdom.

Yunho narrowed his eyes, the scent made a sharp turn, but it was faint.

Instead, the scent had subtle stronger traces to the right. He turned, rushing down that way while Juyeon continued down the main hall.

The feline’s tail twitched when he saw him break off, but he ignored it, keeping his eyes focused on the hall he was running down.

You were…beautiful. He’d been sent with a mission in mind and he intended to follow through, to have your hand, but the moment he laid eyes on you, he knew he’d be the one to sweep you off your feet.

He’ll be damned if they lost to a clumsy dog from that place .

Juyeon swore when he found the hall was a dead end. A window was open, a silken curtain blowing in the wind. Out of it, was an avian, clearly some form of messenger, carrying a torn piece of the dress you had worn before him.

He’d been duped.

“FUCK!”

Yunho had better luck, finding you rushing through the halls while wearing a robe you’d taken from a passing servant. He let out a bark of excitement, the thrum of the chase overriding his senses as he barreled down the hall.

The decorative pins and chains on his outfit jingled and chimed as he got closer to you and you smile to yourself, slipping into a room and tucking yourself into a laundry chute, sticking your tongue out at the large dog as he stuck his head through the opening, eyes wide with excitement as you slide from view.

“Gonna have to try harder than that~” You tease, skipping as you step out from the other side.

Behavior unbecoming of a queen? Possibly. But if you were to tie your life to someone, why shouldn’t you have fun? If they couldn’t do this much, how can they expect to bring your kingdoms closer?

You dust yourself off, your ears twitching ever so slightly before you look around the laundry room. It was deathly quiet inside and you feel yourself freeze.

Someone is inside. Watching.

You don’t move anything but your head, locking eyes with something reflective and gold in the dark room.

The moment you do, it lunges at you, and it took a moment longer than you expected to force your brain to catch up to speed. In those moments, you feel your clothes being grabbed, and you stumble, nearly colliding with a wall when a strong arm wraps around your waist, lifting you with ease.

“Well, that was a pretty neat little trick you did there, my beloved. But it seems I’ve caught you. What do I win?” Juyeon inquired, and you can smell his scent thick in your nose, his heartbeat pounding against his chest and your back.

You smile and turn to him, your own heartbeat thundering loud as you place a kiss to his nose.

“Another round.” You smile and slip from his grip, shrinking your arms as close to your body as you can and sliding the robe you had taken from a servant off, rushing out of the room as Juyeon swore behind you.

The hall isn’t far from your room. You figure everything is ready and if the boys couldn’t catch you by the time the door closed, your little game was over and you’d win.

Did you want to? Probably not, but it was still fun.

A crash sounds from behind you, and you hear two sets of footsteps approaching, the hall flooded with pheromones.

“Move, dog!”

“Like hell, cat. Back off!”

You glance over your shoulder and find both of the men right on your heels.

“Lady Y/N!” They call to you at the same time, and it takes a moment for you to get your bearings, your nose twitching ever so slightly. You sniff, the smell of their combined scents flooding your senses.

Aren’t they too close?

You squeak in surprise as both of them stumble over each other, tripping and falling onto you in a heap. The air leaves your lungs and a startled yelp fell from your lips, in an instant, both of them are picking you up, panic clearly set into their features.

You feel a familiar heat settle in your core, and you realize the repetitious sound in your ears is your own heartbeat. You smile at the two men, and no doubt by now they can smell your arousal.

“Are you okay?” Juyeon inquired, his fiery disposition from before gone as he gently cupped your face, his hand warm to the touch. Yunho checked you over visually, eyes rolling over your body, looking for bruises or worse, blood.

Instead, he’s met with your flushed gaze, your chest rising and falling quickly.

“Looks like you both got me.”

The two men exchange a look with one another before looking back at you.

“Technically, I caught you first.” Juyeon interjected. Yunho narrowed his gaze at him before sighing.

“I’ll leave, I just want to make sure you both didn’t get hurt when I fell on you.”

You take his hand and Juyeon’s, a spark in your eyes as both of them look at you curiously.

“Lady Y/N?”

“If you boys don’t mind, let’s try one more thing. I’m sure that will settle this once and for all.”

They exchange a look with one another and nod slowly, curiosity making both of their respective tails sway to and fro.

-x-

“My, you two are quite pent up mm?” You let out a faux pout, a cock in each hand as you stroke slowly. There’s a wicked glint in your eye as you look up at the two, delighted by the way they both seemed adamant on holding back and not ‘crumbling’ before the other.

Poor things, they still think this an either-or situation.

Your ears twitch ever so slightly, picking up every sharp gasp and low groan from the two of them as you stroke faster, twisting one hand while you gently squeezed with the other.

“M-Milady-” Juyeon grit out, biting his lip so hard you could see small indents from his fangs. Yunho wasn’t much better, letting out unintelligible pants and growls, seemingly trying to keep himself from actually speaking so he didn’t make a fool of himself.

“It’s fine, Juyeon. You already won. Both of you have.”

Both of them sober slightly, looking at one another with a competitive spark before jolting when you bring your lips down, breath fanning over the head of their cocks as you run your tongue over them.

“Let’s get along well, okay~?”

The two buckle, scent thickening with arousal when they finally pick up on your own heat as you shift below them.

They’d stirred something inside of you, it’s only right for them to take responsibility for it.

“A-as if I’d get along well w-with someone like him.” Yunho grit out, his cock throbbing in your mouth as you tease his head with your tongue. Juyeon hissed at him, turning his head sharply.

“F-feeling’s mutual. I doubt a stupid ass dog could pleasure her, anyway .” He grit out. Yunho’s eyes blazed with the challenge and you roll your eyes below them, giving both of their cocks a squeeze. They buck and jolt, their attention landing back on you.

“Play nice.” You warn, pressing their cocks together, dragging your tongue over their slits, keening at the mixed taste. “It’d be a shame if I didn’t get to taste more because you two can’t behave.” You sigh softly, letting your tongue roll over Yunho’s cock, then Juyeon’s, and back again.

The two go quiet. Or, rather, as quiet as they could get as the occasional moan and keen roll from their lips, their rivalry temporarily placated by your actions.

They were handsome, of course. No Kingdom in their right mind would send you someone less than average, but they looked better like this, faces flushed, panting, fingers flexing as they tried to keep their hands off of you.

“That’s better.” You sit up, caressing their balls and smiling, your scent thick and sweet. Both of them unconsciously lean towards you, and you open yourself to them, perking so your breasts are spilling from the top of your dress.

An invitation, that’s what it is.

They took it for what it was, cupping and groping one breast each as you raise your head higher.

“I d-didn’t expect this nn…today,” Yunho growled, his cock throbbing in your small hand as he ran his lips over the sweet glands on the left side of your neck.

Juyeon grunted in agreement, his tongue flicking out, dragging over your throat. The barbs at the center were soft, and you find yourself clenching on nothing as they kiss their way lower, greedy lips finding your nipples.

You gasp and close your eyes, rolling their balls in your hand, trembling in their grip as you feel them running their hands down your body as they alternate between kisses to your chest and small, marking nibbles and bites.

Juyeon’s hand found its way to your folds first, chuckling airdly as he rubbed slowly. You yip and clench on nothing, your hands stopping momentarily.

“Ah, don’t you want us to bond, Bun? Don’t stop just because he’s touching you.” Yunho growled, sucking a spot into your breast you were sure wouldn’t fade easily after tonight. You narrow your eyes at him in challenge, but they flutter the moment Juyeon pinches and rolls your clit, his breath fanning over your ear.

“You’re already so wet. Did it feel nice giving us the run-around. Leaving such a sweet scent for us to follow, it’s only right we pay you back in kind.” He growled, lifting his fingers and spreading them apart, showing you-and Yunho-the slick covering them.

Your lips tremble as you look up at them, your head swirling in need as you watch Juyeon offer his messy fingers to Yunho.

He stared, eyes narrowing in need for a moment before he sucked them into his mouth, fangs grazing Juyeon’s fingers before he pulled back, a deep growl pulling from his chest as he turned to you.

“C’mere. Let’s get you comfortable.”

His definition of ‘comfortable’ was splaying you out with your legs spread in their laps, both of them kissing and biting at your necks as you squirming as you let them both stretch you, your slick making a mess of your ass, their hands, and their thighs below.

“I-I’m ready!” You cry, arching high and clenching on their fingers, mouth falling open as one of them curls their finger up to brush against your gspot. Your cries are met with deep chuckles and a kiss from each of them as they slow only long enough for you to catch your breath.

“Are you sure?” Yunho teases, his lips against your ear before he bites.

Your eyes widen and you find yourself squirting as you jolt, a yip leaving your lips. Both men let out amused keens, holding you so you wouldn’t fall as the sudden shockwave rolls through you.

“So pretty~” Juyeon purred, pulling his fingers free, smiling like the cat that ate the canary as he ran his tongue over his fingers, licking them clean as you pant, trying to catch your breath.

There’s a wet smacking sound above your head and you find yourself squished between the men. One glance across from yourself to the mirror they’d propped you up in front of and you found out why.

Yunho had his hand fisted in Juyeon’s hair, pulling him in for a demanding kiss, chasing your taste on his tongue. The sight made you keen, and you cup their necks, running your fingers over their glands, smiling as they both shuddered.

“It looks like you two are getting along just fine now, mm?” You purr.

They part, panting as they stare each other down.

“Yeah,” Juyeon mewled, his tail twitching and jerking in interest behind him.

“I think we’ll get along just fine.” Yunho licked his lip and moved to grab you by the hips, picking you clean up.

“Come, I think we’ve held back for too long. I’m aching.”

You find it exciting how easily the two of them can move you at will. Strong, yet gentle hands positioned so you were straddling Yunho, staring down hungrily at his cock as Juyeon held his cock up.

Your plan was simply to tease, but as you watch the two eye you hungrily, then eye each other with the same gaze, you realize maybe this was going to work a lot better than your playful mind had anticipated.

Taking Yunho was a task in itself. Even with your slick, you were grateful Juyeon paused to coat the bigger hybrid’s cock in lube provided by your consultants (you’d thank Xiaojun, Mark, and Donghyuck later).

“T-Tight-” Yunho growled, his canines pronounced the more he lost his composure, his hands gripping your hips tight. You cling to his hands, body shaking as Juyeon cooed sweet nothings to you, reaching to rub your clit and the base of your tail.

“A-Ahn- fuck-” You swear, eyes closing as Juyeon’s feline purrs override your mind.

“That’s it. Such a good wife you’re going to be for us. Open your eyes, Princess. You’re bulging.” He growled, cupping your jaw. You gasp and look down, eyes widening as you see the tell-tale bulge in your stomach.

Had…had he grown bigger while he was inside of you?

The very thought made you gush on his cock, your hands falling to Yunho’s chest as you bounce on your own accord, eager to feel him deeper inside.

“S-Shit- Y/N-” He swears, hands tightening on your hips as you ride him, your hips and ass slapping against his thighs. Juyeon watches, mesmerized as you swallow Yunho’s cock, your slick leaving a lewd, shiny trail on his cock that dribbled down to his balls.

“C-Come…come here.” Your voice startled the snow leopard back into focus and he glanced up, pupils dilating as you open your mouth, tongue out for him.

“G-Gimme.” You demand, and he doesn’t need to be told twice, standing up and cupping the back of your head. He doesn’t even have the time to open his mouth and be a gentleman, to urge you to go slow before you dive down, eagerly bobbing your head until you feel him touch the back of your throat.

They both smelled so good, thick and hot and it made you crave more, especially hearing both of them moan and gasp your name. Yunho thrust his hips up, bouncing you in his laps and he would have probably knocked you off balance, had it not have been for the iron-clad grip your thighs had on his frame and his hands had on your hips.

Juyeon kept himself anchored by cupping your head, and rubbing the base of your ears. He found your throat tightening at the motion and smiled wickedly.

“Is that n-nice? Having your cute little ears rubbed while we claim your pussy and your throat?” He panted, hissing through his teeth as he watched you turn your teary, pleasure-struck gaze up to him, drooling as his cock pressed deep into your throat.

“I c-can’t keep holding it back.” Yunho gritted, eyes flickering back and forth between your mouth and your pussy, both stuffed in such a lewd manner.

You clench around him, a subtle sign you didn’t want him to, and thankfully both of them took the sign for what it was, fucking you and your throat with a mismatched tempo that eventually synched up.

Every fiber of your body felt like it was alight with pleasure, and stars exploded behind your lids as you finally felt them flood your mouth and pussy. You feel delighted as you feel the mess between your legs, only sealed inside by Yunho’s cock (which still throbbed, almost as if he wanted to unload more into your tightness). Juyeon pulled you out of your musing when he pulled out of your mouth, panting like a beast as he looked down upon your kiss-swollen and saliva-covered lips.

“That’s our good girl. Are you alright?” Yunho murmured, petting your head. You lick your lips, taking a moment to gather your barings before pressing into his hand, smiling.

“You two don’t think we’re done, do you?” You inquire after catching your breath. They exchange a look of surprise with one another before quickly recovering and grinning.

-x-

Minutes turned to hours, and positions changed. From you eagerly arching your back, nuzzling Yunho’s cock and teasing it with kisses as Juyeon takes you from behind to you biting marks into his ass while Yunho thrusts into him, keeping his cheeks spread with a devious giggle as his fiery voice melted into airy, near shy whimpers. Or the way Yunho trembled and groaned as you bite marks into his thighs while he greedily curled his tongue deep inside of Juyeon, reaching around to stroke him and milk another orgasm from the spent feline.

By the time the three of you are actually satiated, you lay in a pile of noodle-like limbs, dazed and happy as you gather your bearings.

“I think,” Juyeon panted, running a hand through his sweaty locks.

“-this is the start to a wonderful union.” Yunho finished, nosing both you and Juyeon’s hair, clearly close to dozing. You blink.

“...oh, right, the kingdom thing.” You yawn despite both of them laughing. You motion for them to follow you to your private bath, cum dribbling down your legs.

“C’mon, my sweets. We need all the rest we can get if we are to continue our… negotiations tomorrow, yes?” You wink at them over your shoulder, smiling as they appear at your side in a flash, heading deeper into the bathroom before closing the door with a click.

“Right, negotiations. I’m sure that’s what we can call it.”

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - -୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

Taglist

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - -୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

@kimnamshiks @atiny-dazzlinglight @angel0taiyo @gettin-a-lil-hanse @jacksons-goddess-gaia @violetwinters @skmoonchild @seomisaho @drunk-on-hwa @soluvcore @twistedsiren @shymexican

#fie writes #cultofdionysusnet #kwritersworldnet #kdiarynet #codn santa 23 #juyeon smut #yunho smut #juyeon x reader #yunho x reader #kpop smut #ateez smut #the boyz smut #kpop crossover smut #im so sorry its late aaaaa #ill add it to the other masterlist later I'm tired lol #k-vanity

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willicebattlecatsblog · 1 month

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I’d just like to say that you and your comics about Lionblaze have made me care for him and his character more than canon ever could dream to, thank you. I never actually gave him much thought before and saw him as annoying, but now I’ve seen the possible potential he could have as a character because the booms just screwed up his personality, and I love seeing your Lionblaze content. I especially love seeing him as a med cat and him getting closer with Leafpool

Your comment means so much to me,,, I am so happy I helped you appreciate the Lionblaze,,,,

Canon did him so dirty by wasting his potential making him ''standard warrior main character''

The canon will give pieces of his personality, but all these pieces are so incredibly under-exploited and incomplete

As an example, him having moral OCD in PoT is genuinely a really good idea knowing the extent of his power, but they just throw this plotline under the rug in the next book (knowing that it's very hard to get rid of OCD lol) Like we see him losing it in the mountains, we see him going ballistic on Crowfeather and Heathertail. Lionblaze knows how dangerous he can be if he isn't always holding back in battle, and it scares him so bad he has vivid nightmares about killing his loved ones. I think it's the first real time in Warriors we had a main character who had the full potential of becoming a villain the moment he stops holding back. Like that's genuinely really good storytelling, and they just??? throw it away in the next book like it never happened????

This dude kills Russetfur, which should have been his worst nightmare becoming reality. That's it, he finally killed someone. Because for just a few seconds, he got so worried about his leader being attacked and probably killed that he stopped holding back. And yet this is less of a plot point than the obviously accidental death of Flametail. Like Jayfeather tries to save a cat who is drowning and is called a murderer during a Gathering, but Lionblaze who kills Russetfur in front of at least 20 cats, that's fine he was just being silly. Like the writers were writing Lionblaze like crap on purpose at this point they had completely given up on him lmfao

We also see his compassionate and empathetic side shine a few times, mostly when he is the one who forgives Squilf and Leafpool the easiest and the fastest. Lionblaze idolizes Brambleclaw and shows a genuine affection for his dad several times and it's genuinely wholesome. Lionblaze has a few really sweet moments with Leafpool and Squilf in OotS :) i cherish these scenes so much.......

He isn't perfect of course, far from it, he can be a douche (mainly to Heathertail, Breezepelt and Dovewing), he is hot-headed and doesn't think before he speaks or acts, he struggles to communicate properly, he often has a weird tunnel-vision in OotS and doesn't listen to Dovepaw's problems with the care it deserves. For most of PoT, despite going through some tough training as an apprentice and later as a newly made warrior, he is almost completely oblivious to the fact that his own mentor Ashfur as a personal beef with him. As someone with the autism rizz, Lionblaze's communication skills are just so autistic to me. This dude has almost no friends, even his ex-apprentice Dovewing isn't on very friendly terms with him (understandable because he was a bad mentor tbh), he feels safe only around his close family, and messes up almost every friendship and relationship he has because he is incapable of communicating properly. Him trying to date Cinderheart was just Lionblaze being absolutely incapable of understanding her point of view, and then proceeding to literally self harm by letting a ShadowClan massacre him to show Cinderpelt he could be harmed on his own will ?? Like what goes on in the Lionblaze's head ?? is he ok ???

Also they could have made him a medicine cat.... I yearn for the Lionblaze medicine cat plotline so much...... Lionblaze being so incredibly scared of hurting anyone again after his nightmares, or after killing Russetfur, that he just drops all the warrior duties and hides in Leafpool's den all day...... also Jayfeather could have been a warrior 100%, we clearly see him fight very well when he is in tandem with one of his siblings, he is capable of running on ThunderClan territory with no issues once he learned the layout, like there's so excuse anymore StarClan just wanted to ruin his life for entertainment

anyway

They could have done do much more with the Lionblaze.......

#answered #im so sorry i couldn't help infodumping on lionblaze #i cherish lionblaze so much #i know he sucks and he is just a trash character but that's my beloved trash character

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withacapitalp · 2 years

Text

How to Rehabilitate a Jock in Four Months Part 11

Part One Part 10 Part Twelve Link to Ao3

Alrighty guys I want you all to thank @stevethehairington for betaing this and making it fantastic, @henderdads for making the poll that made me finally finish writing this, and @steveshairychest for being a furry lmaooo (Sorry I had to)

Also I know you guys reallllly aren't going to want to hear this, but I wanted to put out one more chapter before I let you know that HTRAJ is going on a hiatus. Not a long one! I just have way too many WIPs going right now, and two of them are Valentines gifts (and good reads if I do say so myself!)

Step Eleven: Play Some Music

“Steve gets shotgun,” Eddie called as they exited the trailer, tossing Steve a smile that made his chest feel fuzzy as he jumped down the last two steps.

“What the hell man?” Jeff grumbled, looking slightly put out, “We take turns,”

Steve opened his mouth to say he didn’t mind and he would take sitting in the back, but Eddie pushed him towards the van with ease.

“Steve’s never been inside of Hortensia, he deserves to see her at her absolute best,” He reasoned, giving Jeff a big megawatt smile and waiting to see what he would say. He still didn’t seem thrilled, but Jeff just rolled his eyes and climbed into the backseat.

Steve would have made a comment on the fact that Eddie had named his beat up clunker ‘Hortensia’ of all things, but it was just so Eddie that all he could do was smile and shake his head. That was classic Eddie, always seeing the good, always finding something to make better. A trashy white van was Hortensia, an ex-jock was a potential friend.

It was his superpower, almost as strong as El’s.

“Your ride, my liege,” Eddie said, opening the passenger side theatrically. Steve rolled his eyes and climbed in, buckling his seatbelt as Eddie jumped into the drivers side seat and flourished his keys.

“Let’s get this show on the road,” Eddie declared, turning the ignition.

Nothing.

Another attempt. The van gave a low grumble but did nothing.

“Damn hunk of junk, piece of shit, mother-”

“Hortensia, huh?” Steve said with a raised brow, interrupting Eddie’s tirade of angry muttering. He threw Steve a slightly dirty look, staring at him directly in the eye as he tried the ignition again.

Bingo. The van roared to life, headlights instantly taking the empty blackness around the trailer and filling it with trees. The entire group cheered as Eddie victoriously beeped the horn, and Steve opened his mouth to say some stupid comment that would probably make everyone laugh.

Then the headlights flickered.

In a single moment the ease, the happiness, it was just gone. Like a fire in dry brush, it had disappeared, and all that was left was a quick panicky feeling that there was something watching them, something waiting nearby.

He needed his bat.

“What the hell- Woah, what’re you doing?!” Eddie demanded as Steve shoved his way out of the car, walking over to his Beemer. He had already gotten his backpack out and was rifling through it by the time Eddie snuck up on him.

“Steve?” Eddie asked softly.

Eddie was out of the van. He was vulnerable. If something was sneaking up on them, then he would be the first one down.

Steve moved quickly, spinning the two of them so Eddie was up against his car, and Steve was out in front of him. That was better. He didn’t have a weapon, but he knew how to fight these things. At the very least, Eddie would have the time to run to the van if things went bad.

“Do you see anything?” Steve asked, looking around them.

The lights had only flickered once, just once, but once was enough. Once was a warning, and ignoring that would be stupid.

That was Hopper’s number one rule. Don’t be Stupid.

“What should I be seeing? A boogeyman?” Eddie teased, standing up straight and walking over to Steve, “You think I’m gonna see a were-”

“Eddie,” Steve cut him off with a severe look, grabbing Eddie’s wrist and pulling him behind him again, “Do you see anything?”

“No,” Eddie murmured after a moment. Steve spared a quick glance behind him, faltering when he saw just how uneasy Eddie was.

“There’s…Steve there’s nothing out there,”

Nothing out there. The lights were clear, they had been the entire time, and there was no growling, no sound of strange steps creeping up. Just the purr of a rusty engine, and the sound of Steve’s blood racing in his ears.

Eddie was right. There was nothing out there.

A rush of humiliation barreled over Steve, erasing everything else. He let out a slow shaking breath, running a hand over his face and hating the way his eyes were starting to burn.

A few lights acting funny and he turned into this? Over lights?

“Are you-”

“I’m fine,” Steve whispered, the lie strikingly obvious to both of them, “Just-”

Steve reached around Eddie and grabbed his backpack off of the ground, hefting it up over one shoulder and turning back to the van.

“I have what I need. Let’s go,” Steve said, closing the door before Eddie could ask him again if he was okay.

Flashlight, walkie-talkie, car keys, first aid kit, knife.

Flashlight, walkie-talkie, car keys, first aid kid, knife.

Flashlight-

What was he doing?

Steve forced an exhale, pushing all of the air out of his lungs, letting the deafening chatter from the car around sink back in, and finally releasing the death grip he had on his bag.

The backpack that had his flashlight, walkie-talkie, car keys, first aid kit, and knife. Everything he could carry inconspicuously in case of an emergency. His knife wasn’t ideal, but better than nothing. Steve would have loved to have Baby with him too, but she had to stay in the trunk of the Beemer. The last thing he needed was everyone to know how actually insane he was now, and carrying around a bat full of nails was a one way ticket to the loony bin.

Maybe he should ask Nancy to teach him how to shoot a gun. A pistol was easily hidden, and-

Jesus. There really was something wrong with him.

This was fun. Steve was supposed to be having fun. It was just a nice normal night with nice normal friends. The gates were closed, the kids were all together having a sleepover at the Wheeler’s, everything was just fine.

So why was his stomach still twisted up in knots? Why was he obsessively looking out the window at the trees, just to make sure nothing was running alongside the van?

“What do you think, Steve?” Eddie asked, thrusting Steve back into the conversation happening all around him. The bumping bass from the radio was gone, and the rest of the group was now staring at him, waiting for an answer.

Shit.

Steve curled his hand around the strap of his backpack again, shrugging and giving Eddie a tight lipped smile, hoping that would be at least a somewhat adequate answer. Judging by Eddie’s furrowed brow and downturned mouth, it wasn’t.

Flashlight. Walkie-Talkie. Car Keys. First Aid Kit. Knife. Flashlight. Walkie-Talkie. Car Keys. First Aid Kit. Knife.

“He probably hasn’t listened to either of them yet,” Jeff cut in, tapping his chin.

Oh. They were still talking about bands. Steve probably couldn’t have answered that question even if he had been listening instead of quietly freaking out.

“You can tell us which was your favorite after the show,” Frank said, making eye contact with Steve from the rearview mirror and giving him an easygoing smile. Steve returned it, feeling the tension in his shoulders ease up ever so slightly.

Frank was a cool guy. Understated, but nice. He always kind of hung around in the back, but that was fine. In a group like Hellfire with so many big personalities, having a steady person like Frank helped to balance everything out.

“I still think he would like Black Sabbath best,” Jeff said, settling back in his seat.

“Of course you think that,” Gareth replied with a roll of his eyes, pausing for a minute before crossing his arms and continuing in a begrudging tone, “Quiet Riot. Everyone can appreciate them. Even Steve.”

It wasn’t exactly an insult, so Steve decided to let go of any part of him that bristled at Gareth’s words. Gareth was a lot like Mike, it took him time to warm up. It was just…taking a bit longer than Steve had expected it to.

Whatever. He liked a good challenge.

“Trust me, we’ll play a song from the new Dio album and Steve’ll be a total convert,” Eddie said, shooting Steve a bright smile that warmed him from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. “We’ll have to get you a battle vest to match mine soon enough,”

Without really thinking about it, Steve let go of his bag and reached up to play with the guitar pick hanging around his neck. Even just touching it was enough to ease away whatever nerves were still rolling around his body.

It wasn’t like he was magically some different person, but wearing Eddie’s clothes and having his necklace was… it was almost like there was a shield. They were a buffer, a barrier between Steve and the fear that seemed to rule over everything he did nowadays. Here he wasn’t the babysitter or the protector. He was the new kid, someone who was still learning and allowed to slip up. If he didn’t know something, then it wasn’t the end of the world.

“You sure you’re okay?” Eddie asked, staying quiet so the other three who were still debating wouldn’t hear him.

“Yeah,” Steve replied immediately, squeezing his fingers around the chain and taking a slow deep breath, “better now,”

“If you wanna talk, I’m always here,” Eddie whispered back, giving Steve one more soft glance before turning his eyes back to the road. Steve sighed, dropping his hands back to his lap and letting his head rest against the seatbelt, closing his eyes so he didn’t have to see the forest around them.

The thing was, Steve knew he wanted to talk to Eddie. He wanted to tell him that Dustin had left at 4 o’clock today, and Steve had been late because he was nervous about coming tonight. He wanted to tell Eddie that he was worried about fitting in, worried about letting his guard down, worried about the endless ‘what-if's' that seemed to run around in his mind in an endless loop these days. Eddie would listen, and even if he didn’t understand, he would empathize.

Steve wanted to, but he couldn’t.

Because Eddie was understanding, but he was also so so nosey. He would poke and prod and try to learn the whole story, because he wouldn’t be able to help himself, and Steve couldn’t handle that. If that happened, Steve would have to pull back, put distance between them. Not only to protect himself and his people, but to protect Eddie too.

Steve had seen what happened to people who got pulled into their world.

Bob was what happened.

And even the thought of something like that happening to Eddie made Steve’s heart race. He reached up to touch the guitar pick again just to ground himself in the moment.

It was fine. Nothing was going to happen to Eddie. Nothing was going to happen to any of them. Steve wouldn’t let anything ever happen to any of them.

“Alright freeloaders, we’re here!” Eddie crowed, and Steve opened his eyes just as they pulled into the parking lot of a dingy looking hovel.

The place looked about two steps from being closed for a health code violation, and Steve was instantly reminded that his mom had made him promise to never get within a thousand feet of the Hideout. It was apparently a bar for ‘other’ kinds of people. Mechanics and factory workers and cashiers. Not Harringtons.

But here he was, right outside, and the world hadn’t caved in. Imagine that. Steve laughed quietly to himself, getting out of the van and coming around to the back with the rest.

“‘Sup douchebags!” A voice called from across the parking lot.

Rocky and Janet were walking over, both decked out in their metal best. Rocky was wearing the same spiked vest he wore every day, but he had chosen a pair of jeans to go with it that was more chain than denim, a look that would have gotten him sent straight to detention if he so much as stepped onto the parking lot of the school wearing it. Janet was wearing her usual attire, but her hair was up in a messy bun complete with deep dark eyeliner and a skull patterned choker.

“Hey asshole,” Gareth replied, slapping Rocky’s hand against his own and opening the van door, “Help us with set up?”

As they began to coordinate getting all of the stuff out of the van, Janet skipped over to Frank to chat.

“I thought you weren’t allowed to come out tonight,” Frank said, rubbing his arm and giving her a timid smile.

“I wasn’t. As far as my parents know I’m asleep in bed right now,” She replied, giving Frank a mischievous little grin as she kissed him quickly on the cheek, turning around before she could see the way the boy immediately turned into a tomato.

“Hi Steve. I like the new look. You should wear it to school when we go back. Start 1985 off with a bang,” Janet said in her normal slightly snarky tone.

“Hi Janet,” Steve said, shoving his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket and ducking his head down to hide the stupid grin on his face as she came over to inspect him, pointing out various add-ons he could have made to get the ‘true full metal experience’.

This was the thing he had been searching for. Blissful normalcy with dumb conversations and stupid lighthearted jabs. Something easy that wasn’t bogged down in reality.

“Hup two, guys. We’re already late,” Eddie huffed, pulling on an amp that was far too big for him to hold up on his own.

“And who’s fault is that?” Jeff said with a roll of his eyes, quickly stepping in to take the other side of the equipment and gently easing it out of the van. Steve grabbed a random box and hefted it up, walking towards the door with Janet hot on his heels, still examining his new outfit.

“Is that Eddie’s necklace?” She blurted out the second she spotted the dark red swirls, her jaw dropping open comically wide as she stared at it with huge eyes.

“Someone decided to play Heavy Metal Barbie with pretty boy right before we were supposed to leave,” Gareth grunted, accidentally smacking Rocky with one of his drums as he stepped out of the van.

“Okay! Let’s just get moving, please!” Eddie quickly shouted in an uncharacteristically high pitched voice, practically dragging Jeff as he hurried into the bar.

If Steve wanted to let himself over examine things, then he would have dared to say that Eddie was blushing. Instead of assessing that particular thought, he grabbed the door and held it open for the rest.

With all seven of them working, set up went quickly, and before too long there were only a few things left to get.

“I’ll grab them so you can start tuning or whatever,” Steve offered.

“I’ll go with you,” Rocky said, pulling Steve out of the bar.

“You know, I can’t believe he let you wear his lucky pick,” Rocky said the second they were alone outside, pitching his voice low even though there was no one to overhear them. “He doesn’t even let anyone else touch it, let alone wear it. ”

This was enough to stop Steve in his tracks, his eyes darting down to the little piece of plastic around his neck.

No one else was even allowed to touch it?

The necklace was already sentimental enough when it was just Eddie’s favorite. Now it was something precious, a treasure that wasn’t meant for any other person. Steve had been joking about Eddie staking a claim on him before, but the guitar pick practically felt like a brand at this point.

The startling thing was just how much Steve didn’t mind.

It was the same as ‘Sweetheart’. This was another thing that guys weren’t supposed to do for other guys, another thing that Steve shouldn’t want. He should be taking it off right now, handing it back to Eddie and going home back to the life he belonged in.

None of this was right. Steve shouldn’t be here at a bar meant for people who were supposedly below him, he shouldn’t be dressed up like a metalhead going to listen to thrashing loud music in the middle of the night, and he certainly shouldn’t be happy Eddie Munson was having him wear something he wouldn’t even let anyone else even touch.

This wasn’t the way things were supposed to be. This wasn’t who Steve was supposed to be.

But was anything the way it was meant to be anymore?

There were monsters from other dimensions and little girls who could move things with their minds. There were government cover ups, evil scientists, and dead people all over the place.

No, nothing was how it was supposed to be anymore. At least this was a change that made Steve happy. He didn’t need to think about that too much, or try to figure out why.

At least, he didn’t need to yet.

“Well…maybe he just thought I could use some good luck tonight,” Steve murmured, reaching up and letting his fingers rest against the necklace for a moment before grabbing one last amp and walking back into the bar. He put it down gently on the floor of the ‘stage’ (It was a rickety wooden platform that was barely a feet off the ground, but Eddie had called it a stage), fully intending to turn right around and go back to the car to get his backpack.

“That was the last of it, Sweetheart,” Eddie called from behind, making Steve stop short, “Rocky and Jan grabbed the best table in the house for you guys. It’s far enough that the drunks won’t hurl on you if they end up having a little bit too much. ”

“Oh um,” Steve’s mind flitted around as he looked for any excuse he could use, “I…left my wallet in the van,”

Steve crossed his fingers, praying that Eddie wouldn’t call out the very obvious wallet shaped lump in his right pants pocket.

“You won’t need it,” Eddie said smoothly, hopping down and steering Steve gently towards the table with their friends, “The barkeep knows to keep my people fed and watered. Just let him know you’re here with me, or better yet, make Rocky do all the heavy lifting. He is a freshman after all, he has to take his licks.”

That would be great if Steve was actually worried about his wallet. He wasn’t. He needed his flashlight, walkie-talkie, car keys, first aid kit, and knife. He needed to be prepared in case things went wrong.

He needed those things, but he couldn’t explain to Eddie why, and he couldn’t walk out right now without looking like he was trying to ditch. Steve’s breathing started to kick up, and he could feel his heart leaping in his chest.

They weren’t safe right now. Anything could happen, and he wasn’t prepared. Anything could go wrong, and-

“Relax,” Eddie said slowly as they reached the table, pulling out a stool and nudging Steve towards it, “No one’s gonna bite,”

“I will,” Rocky immediately replied, baring his teeth just for show.

“Okay well don’t sit too close to him, and you’ll be just fine,” Eddie laughed, the other two Hellfire members snickering alongside him. This was where Steve should laugh with them too, but his throat was closing up.

He was in a place he didn’t know, with a group who he didn’t really know, without anything to defend himself or keep in touch with his people.

This wasn’t safe. Steve wasn’t safe right now.

A soft touch on his arm startled him and he jumped back. Or he would have, if Eddie hadn’t held on and kept him from moving and crashing into the table. Steve stiffened up, looking up at Eddie knowing that he wasn’t doing a damn thing to hide how freaked out he had become.

He couldn’t care about that. He couldn't care about anything except how dangerous everything had suddenly become.

“Seriously. Everything’s okay. I promise,” Eddie whispered, leaning in so their heads were close together. Steve closed his eyes, taking a deep breath the way Joyce had shown him. In for four, hold for four, out for four.

Usually it didn’t do anything for him, breathing slowly normally only made him even more aware of how little air there was in the room, but the breathing combined with Eddie’s hand still on his arm was enough to get Steve centered again.

Everything was okay. The kids were safe, Nancy and Jonathan were safe, Hopper and Joyce were safe.

Steve was safe.

He was out with friends doing something fun, and there was nothing wrong with that. This was normal. This was what he was working towards. All he wanted was something easy, and this was easy. He didn’t have to make things complicated by being afraid.

And, if anything went wrong, he could just run outside and get his things.

“Thanks,” Steve whispered.

“Anytime,” Eddie whispered back, his big dark eyes locked on Steve’s. Once again Steve was completely aware of the guitar pick around his neck, and the fact that no one else was even allowed to touch it.

“Eddie! Seriously! Tick fucking tock!” Frank shouted from the ‘stage’. Eddie growled quietly, muttering to himself about evil bandmates who had no sense of boundaries. Steve snorted, chuckling softly until Eddie stopped grumbling.

“Have a good show,” Steve said, pulling away from Eddie and hopping up onto the stool.

“Prepare to have your world rocked,” Eddie said, trying to act cool as he walked backwards, but tripping on the world’s tiniest step and falling flat on his ass on the stage.

Steve made a valiant attempt to not laugh along with the rest of the bar, but he quickly failed, tossing his head back and laughing loudly, putting a hand on his chest and feeling the hard plastic against his fingertips. Eddie paused, giving Steve an indescribable look before straightening up and brushing away the invisible dirt from his vest.

“And with that incredibly suave move, I’d like to formally introduce our band to the dozen or so drunks that are here tonight,” Eddie said into the mic, spreading his arms out wide like he would at Hellfire. The meager crowd yelled back and raised their drinks, making Eddie put on an absolutely feral grin

“Ladies and gentleworms, we are Corroded Coffin,”

Much like Dungeons and Dragons, Steve hadn’t really expected that he would enjoy the show. He liked Eddie and he enjoyed the rest of the group, so he figured he would come and watch and be a good sport.

And, much like Dungeons and Dragons, he was completely wrong.

It wasn’t his favorite genre of music by any means, but the energy in the air was absolutely enthralling. From the first note there was just this push, this indescribable palpable movement in the air that was exhilarating while also being settling. It was like they were collectively experiencing something special, and all having a grand old time while doing it.

It didn’t hurt that he was also about four whiskey sours in.

He had only planned to drink one, maybe two, but every time his glass was empty another magically appeared by his arm, courtesy of Rocky and Janet. He had tried to turn them down a few times, but they could be awfully persuasive when they wanted to be, and Steve couldn’t help hoping that the alcohol might clear up the last bit of the panic that was still rolling around in his head.

So with a warm fire in his belly and a brain that was finally for once quieting down, he happily listened as Janet and Rocky screamed the lyrics right alongside Eddie and the rest. He couldn’t really understand, per say, but the energy was all that mattered.

And then, halfway into their set, everything fell apart.

“Alright, everyone,” Eddie said as they caught their breath from an original that left everyone slapping their tables and stomping their feet, “It’s time to settle a bet.”

He turned to face Steve dead on, a gleam in his eyes that had nothing to do with the low light of the bar.

“We have, let’s call him a…metal virgin, with us tonight,” Eddie drawled, letting the crowd hoot and holler as they pleased. There was less than two dozen people in the bar with them, and there was no way any of them besides Hellfire knew that Eddie was talking about Steve, but he still felt like every eye in the room had just turned to him.

“Earlier tonight the band and I were trying to figure out who would make him a convert. Black Sabbath, Quiet Riot, Metallica. I said Dio, because I think this song is right up his alley. So, this one’s for you,”

Steve’s heart began to race in a completely brand new way as Eddie began shredding down on his guitar, joined by Gareth with an impressively quick beat on the drums.

The song was good. It was fast-paced, lively, and Steve could actually follow along with the lyrics unlike some of the more intense songs from before. Eddie had hit it exactly. The song was just another example of Eddie knowing him even more than Steve expected him to.

It was so good in fact, that Steve almost didn’t notice the lights behind the bar begin to flicker.

Almost.

Steve’s hands began to shake as his eyes darted around, looking at all of the walls. The other lights were also flickering, but the walls were still straight and narrow. No bending. No monsters.

Not yet.

Or not here.

Steve’s heart dropped as reality slapped him square across the face. If the lights were flickering, but there was no sign of any monsters, then they were close, but not here. They could be anywhere, going after anyone.

Going after one of his people.

Steve stumbled off the stool, catching Janet and Rocky’s attention as he nearly toppled to the ground.

“Steve! Are you okay?!” Janet yelled above the noise.

No, he wasn’t okay. He was a stupid fool in fact. A complete idiot who had honestly let himself believe that the danger was gone when he knew it wasn’t.

“I- I need to-” Steve couldn’t finish the sentence, couldn’t make his breath even enough to find the words for what he needed.

He needed his bat. He needed his backpack. He needed to get in touch with Hopper. He needed to get out of here.

He needed to find his kids.

And then, just as Eddie hit one last screeching solo note on his guitar, everything went dark.

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vampiric-hunger · 4 months

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⊱─ 𝕕𝕒𝕣𝕜𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕤 𝕠𝕗 𝕤𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕟: 𝕔𝕙. 𝟟 - 𝕡𝕣𝕚𝕕𝕖 ─⊰

➺ 𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘: Ascended Astarion/f!reader

➺ 𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕤: no y/n is used, rating - E, emotional hurt/comfort, fluff, smut, body worship, cunnilingus, grinding, fingering, vampiric bites, blood drinking, PiV, breast play, creampie, happy ending.

➺ 𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪 𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪: you're skilled, driven and most importantly - ambitious. but even as someone in your position, a trained assassin and a leader of your own Guild, you still lend yourself to jobs that are of importance. even if those jobs sometimes mean attending parties. tonight - it's a masquerade and you're bored out of your mind, until the man who hired you to protect him leaves you alone, at the mercy of a stranger who suddenly took a keen interest in you.

➺ 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 5,626

𝕒𝕦𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕣 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖: it is done! it is over! honestly i don't even know what to say. first i want to thank those who followed this story from the very first chapter and those who kept supporting me along the way of writing it even when i had doubts. second, i want to thank everyone who commented, liked and shared this fic, every thing, big or small, is always appreciated by me. and now, i bring to your attention - the ending of this story, please enjoy♡~

➺ 𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥: [link]

Last time you were at the luxurious mansion you were met with hostility. Not only from Astarion’s spawn but from the Vampire Lord himself, yet when you show up at the iron gate this time you don’t have to wait or wonder when you will be noticed if at all. The moment you stop by the locked entry a thrall appears through the open door and scurries your way.

“My Lady.” he addresses you and to your surprise you notice that it’s the same man who came to question you the first time you were here, yet his attitude right now is furthest thing from sour. “Wonderful evening.” he adds and you raise an eyebrow, watching him pick a key on a steel ring and slip it into a lock. He’s not even looking at you, his eyes are downcast or focused on his fingers, you can’t really tell which is the reason, and it takes you a moment to realize you should respond.

“Good evening.” you simply say, not bothering to make small talk because this spawn is obviously only polite to you because of his Master.

“This way, my Lady.” the gate is opened and you step inside, then stop and look behind you as the thrall locks it again, but you’re not looking at him, you’re looking to the houses and streets that you are leaving behind. For a second you wonder if you will be able to freely wander them again.

A moment of doubt, of worry, of fear, and your steps falter when the spawn begins leading you towards the massive door, but you press your lips into a thin line and follow him anyway. It’s not too late to say no, you know that, it’s not too late to ask Astarion what exactly he has in mind for you. And as you make your way through the corridors, you begin preparing questions in your head.

This is not something you forgot to consider since last night, when you both at last made yourselves presentable and returned to the party. Duke was furious, obviously, but Astarion’s charm and your apologies eventually calmed him down enough to warn you specifically not to do anything like this again or he will make your life in Gate unbearable. You heard the threat loud and clear and accepted it. The price could’ve been bigger to pay if Duke Sanolin wasn’t the man to see any worth in you. Thus, when you returned to your own home instead to the Guildhall, not wanting to deal with jobs and reports, you did spend considerable time thinking about what happened.

And yet you still came.

The truth is simple to you now, even if you still doubt the longevity of it, but you can’t resist the pull of a man who tried so damn hard to make you his. And your tired, yearning heart compels you to keep walking, to keep following the silent spawn, because there’s a promise. A promise that you won’t have to struggle again, a promise that you won’t be hurt again, a promise that everything you had to suffer through had a reason, even if that reason is to be loved by someone. Doesn’t everyone want that? Even to you this notion feels silly and naïve but you can’t help it. How Astarion makes you feel overrides your logic, the lessons you have learned in the past and your worries for the future.

After all, you are used to chains, but you have hope, however gullible that hope makes you feel, that maybe this is exactly what your life led you towards.

“Here, my Lady.” the spawn interrupts your musings and you stop when he bows his head and gestures towards the door. You recognize it, it’s the same one that you stood in front of before when you visited Astarion in his bedroom.

Puzzled you look at the thrall but he’s not moving nor is he looking at you, his glowing red eyes focused on the noses of his shoes as if there’s something written on them so you sigh and lick your lips swallowing dryly before you take the handle and push it down. The moment you do it, you hear the vampire spawn turn on his heels and leave in hurried footsteps.

You resist the desire to look at him leaving you here, as if he’s a friend who suddenly abandoned you in the crowd of faces, but instead of letting your anxiety get the better of you, you push the handle down and open the door.

The view that opens in front of you surprises you. Your lips part in a silent inhale and your eyes widen. What you saw it last, the lair of a spoiled slob now is a wonderfully tidy bedroom. The curtains prevent last rays of light entering the room, but there’s red lit candles everywhere. The tables are clean and there’s flowers in vases on them. There are no piles of clothes in front of a closet, the canopy over the bed bears dark red curtains neatly tied to bedposts and the sheets themselves are white, tidy and clean. No bodies hidden behind furniture, no blood stains left. It’s like a completely different room to what you saw first time and the contrast takes your breath away.

Except Astarion is nowhere to be seen.

You walk past the door, letting it close behind you, and you look around, searching for a glimpse of silver hair but you realize you’re completely alone. So you step deeper into the room, walking to one small table and touching the blooms of flowers with your fingertips, then look around again. You can wait of course, until he appears. You are sure he has been informed that you arrived already but you feel tense enough. Enough not want to be alone.

“Astarion?” you call out gently at first, not sure if you should rise your voice, but when nothing happens and no reply comes, you try again and louder. “Astarion, are you here?”

You suddenly get startled when a door you haven’t noticed until now, the one on your left, swings open and Astarion steps in with a smile.

“Pardon my delay.” he apologizes and closes the door, strolling right up to you. Before you can say anything, for a moment focused on his expensive-looking navy blue and silver embroidered clothes, you feel Astarion’s hand slip around your waist and pull you against his body with a dance swing.

“Wait!” you gasp, caught off guard as your steps falter to follow him but Astarion only laughs and lifts your chin to him, his crimson gaze intense and his smile wide.

“Wait for what? You came and I’ve waited enough.” he says and steals a kiss the moment you part your lips to speak. You make a noise of protest, but feeling his tongue against yours makes the heat engulf you on the inside and his arm around your waist only holds you against his chest firmer, stronger.

When Astarion releases your lips from the devouring passion of his, he smiles and strokes your chin with a thumb while still holding it up.

“I missed you terribly.” he announces and you can’t help but smile slightly.

“You saw me last night.”

“I didn’t see you today yet, have I?”

“No, but-“

“No buts, you came because you want to be mine. And I want to make you mine. I waited for this long enough.” Astarion reasserts and leans in for another kiss but this time you have your wits about you and you quickly push your palm against his chest to stop him. Vampire cranes his neck in further attempt to press his lips against yours but you slightly shake your head, your expression becoming serious.

“I have questions.” you say quietly and finally he stops, there’s a flash of emotion in his eyes and his face but he just smiles and straightens his back, releasing your chin and gripping your waist with both hands now.

“Questions? And what could they be?” he sounds almost dismissive if not for the smallest sound of strain in his voice. You realize he’s worried.

“I want to know what…” you pause, picking your words. “What turning me into a vampire will mean for me.” you stop again to think and Astarion remains silent, letting you speak. “I want to know what to expect, I want to know if… if you will take my freedom. If I’ll be just like the rest of your spawn – a servant, a slave.”

This time you see a clear flash of fear in his crimson gaze but Astarion quickly masks it and lets go of your waist, turning from you and walking to the small table that has a what looks like a carafe of wine, he then proceeds to flip the glasses up and begin pouring the liquid.

“What do you know about me, little assassin?” he suddenly asks, his voice serious and you raise your eyebrows.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m sure you gathered as much information as you could about me, didn’t you? If not, you’d be a lazy assassin.” Astarion teases with a smile and a glance cast in your direction. This makes you relax, smile and approach him, letting him hand you one of the glasses.

“You are right, I did gather as much about your past I could.” you take a sip and Astarion turns to face you, a twin glass in his hand and he cocks his head slightly to the side and gestures for you to go on.

“Don’t hold me in suspense then, please share.” he smiles even if you notice that his eyes remain serious. He has a point he wants to make, you are sure of it.

“I know you have been a vampire spawn to a man named Cazador for several centuries. I know that you used to be courtesan. I suspect you killed your own Master when you had the chance, given the mansion that originally was in his name.” you now too gesture around you and Astarion nods.

“Quite correct without the lurid details. Clever, but I always expect you to be clever.” he sips his wine and looks around briefly, as if for a moment reliving all the memories of haunting these walls as a mere spawn and not as a Lord he is now. “Yes Cazador, my old Master, sent me out to get him victims. For blood or other purposes, me and other spawn were never made aware of his plans.” Astarion’s eyes return to yours. “But he’s gone now. He served his purpose.” you open your mouth to ask a question but he lifts a single finger, wanting for you to wait. “So you see, I have a history of slavery. Just like you.”

Dread fills your heart and your insides fill with freezing led at his words. You can’t move, can’t speak, can barely move and your eyes widen.

“How do you…” you finally gasp out rather than speaking up and Astarion’s eyes soften, his smile is gentle and he reaches out with one hand cupping the side of your face, his touch so tender.

“Clever as you are, you’re still a mortal working with other mortals. I am a Vampire, little assassin, I have power and influence. Finding about your past wasn’t hard. Fiends and demons like to brag way more than you may realize when they think you match their depravity.” words spoken softly, but they cut like a dagger’s blade.

You can’t help it, sorrow fills your chest and you look at Astarion, the only man that ever made you feel so fragile as you do now, the only man that makes you want to seek his comfort. You don’t know what to say so you just close your eyes and try not let tears gather behind your eyelids as you lean into his touch.

“Tell me now, darling, do you really think I would seek to take away your freedom?” Astarion whispers after he takes a single step to stand closer to you and you look at him again, searching his eyes for an answer or maybe reassurance. “I want you to be mine willingly. I could’ve made you into a spawn any time when we were together, but I want you to be mine because you want it. Because you are special. Do you think I want to shackle you in a gilded cage now that you’re here? No, the beauty of a bird is when it’s free, not when its song is echoing among cold walls.”

This time you can’t help it, tears do gather in your eyes and you step away from him, turning your back to the man who somehow managed to prod at your scars and make them hurt but in a way you never experienced before. You take a big gulp of your wine and pause when you feel Astarion’s hand on your shoulder.

“I know how you feel, darling. I know. Who can understand the pain of a former slave better than another such slave. But your past still weights on you and I want nothing more than to mend your clipped wings.” as he speaks Astarion leans closer to your ear, whispering gently, then he pauses to press a kiss to the back of your neck. “So no, I won’t cage you if you’re worried about that.” he keeps whispering and this time moves just enough to look at the side of your face. His unoccupied hand slides around your waist, and your back is brought against his chest gently and carefully. “I just want you to be with me. Do you want that?”

You turn your head to look at him, managing to tame your tears and not let them spill down your face then you swallow heavily, struggling against the knot at the back of your throat, but you nod, feeling how your heart fills with so much emotion once you do.

“Then tell me, little assassin. Tell me you want to be with me, tell me you want to be my consort and let me show you just how much I need you.”

A pause as you both look at each other, as you explore your emotions like it’s a puzzle to be solved, looking for doubts, for fears, for anything that will make you step away, but you find nothing.

This is what you want and you will take the risks, whatever they are.

“Make me yours, Astarion.” you whisper and Astarion’s eyes leave yours to land on your lips, then he presses a brief kiss there.

“Then trust me.”

With that he releases you and gently takes away your glass, momentarily stepping away to put it and his own on the nearest table, then he turns back to you and offers you his hand. You glance at it, then at his face, seeing nothing but soft emotion displayed there. If you don’t love him yet, you know that you will soon.

So you take his hand and your heart feels light instead of heavy, opposite of what you felt when you came to the mansion just earlier, as you walked the corridors, even when you entered this bedroom. No, you want this and everything that comes with it.

Astarion smiles when he gently clutches your fingers and he leads you across the bedroom to the bed, then turns to you once again and pulls you into his arms, pressing a heated kiss to your lips. You return his passion, your fingers finding his waist and pulling him as close as possible against your body. You feel your heart beat heavily in your chest and you exhale when Astarion separates from your lips, beginning to trail open mouth kisses along your jawline.

“You will never hurt again, I promise.” he whispers passionately and you let yourself be held, feeling his lips trail lower, on your neck, his tongue searching for your pulse and stopping there when he finds it. “I’ll make sure that no one ever hurts you again.”

You believe him. Not because you are now aware of the power he can wield, but because of how he says it – with such utter conviction that it dismisses last trails of doubt that were lingering over your mind like shadows right as dawn comes, fragile and weak.

“I know.” you answer with a whisper and Astarion raises his head then smiles in such a way that it makes you smile in return.

“Good. You won’t have to worry about anything ever again. You will be my consort, free to do anything and to be anyone.” with a finger he traces a line against your bottom lip and you see the passion blazing in his eyes, then he kisses you again, letting his fingers wander to your clothes and to your shirt, which he quickly proceeds to unbutton.

While he does that you kiss him back and let your own hands wander, undoing his coat and sliding it off his shoulders which gets quickly followed by your shirt. Astarion pauses then, releasing your lips from the heated kiss to find the end of your strophium and begin to undo it. You lift your arms and let him proceed until the soft leather is spooled around your feet.

“Primitive.” Astarion gives you a glance with a smile and you raise an eyebrow, amused by the comment but smile in return.

“Functional.” you correct him and Astarion chuckles, letting the leather drop from his fingers before he cups your breasts and puts his face in between them, inhaling your scent.

You slightly blush and pause as he does this, watching the vampire give more open mouth kisses to the mounds that his hands have formed, leaving wet trails of his tongue when he stops to suck at one nipple, then another, and then his face is in front of yours again before your lips are captured with his.

Your fingers proceed to work on Astarion’s shirt and quickly it follows rest of the garments to the floor. Breaking away from his lips, you trail your palms over his chest and lean in, kissing his collarbone, feeling him gently cradle your head as you do, as you raise to his neck, giving it a playful bite and making him chuckle again.

“I’ll have to teach you that we ask before we bite. But that can wait. First-“ he says playfully and releases your head, now working on straps of your pants, then you are forced to stop your affectionate kisses because he kneels right in front of you and lifts his face up. “Do you really want to be with me, forever?” Astarion asks and you notice a slight hint of worry in his features.

Smiling, you reach to his chin and gently hold it as you look deeply into his sanguine eyes.

“Yes, Astarion, I do want to be with you.” you hope that this is enough to reassure him at last and it looks like it is because he smiles and leans in, pressing his lips to your stomach ever so briefly before he suddenly yanks your pants downwards, making you yelp from surprise and then laugh.

“Then let’s have some fun. On your last night alive.” he gives you a playful look and you let his silver curls wrap around your fingers as you push them into his hair, then you help him take off your shoes and rest of your clothes.

As you stand completely naked in front of him, Astarion presses his palms on the sides of your thighs and slides them up until he reaches your hips. His eyes keep wandering over your form like he’s trying to memorize every detail about you.

“Perfect…” he whispers and then dips his head towards you, his tongue finding your soaked folds and making you gasp.

Your fingers clench in his hair and you bite on your lower lip as you feel his hot tongue lap at your cunt with devotion of a worshipper, his fingers hold your hips tightly and don’t let you move, making you stand still while he’s tasting you like you’re the sweetest nectar. After a moment or two you begin to moan softly and Astarion continues for a while longer, the tip of his tongue working against the sensitive nub of your clit, making you shiver. When he finally leans back you are slightly out of breath and your face is flushed.

“Go to bed.” Astarion whispers as he licks his lips and lets go of your hips.

You nod, turning and taking few remaining steps to the bed. You trace your fingertips over the white silk sheets until you hear Astarion walk to you and then his naked chest presses against your back, his hard erection finding its temporary resting place in the cleft of your rear and his hands are on your shoulders as he leans in and kisses your neck again.

You feel him grind his length against you and it makes you even more aroused as pressure against your back makes you lean slightly over the bed.

“Like this.” Astarion whispers against your skin then he leans just enough to grab your thigh and guide your knee over the edge of the bed, giving you more stability. “Stay just like this.”

You exhale and then moan when you feel vampire’s mouth return to the side of your neck, the hand that guided your leg now slips between them from the front and his fingertips tease your folds while his other hand grabs your waist to keep you exactly how he wants you to stay. At first it’s easy but then his fingers make your back arch from pleasure and you have to support yourself with one hand on the edge of the bed. You want to say something, not even sure what, but before you can you feel the piercing sting of fangs in your neck. You gasp and your eyes snap open as Astarion swallows couple gulps of your blood.

“Don’t worry, I’m not turning you just yet. Right now it’s about pleasure.” he reassures you with a whisper and this time you feel his fangs in your shoulder, making you moan instead of yelp.

“You’re confident this is pleasurable.” you tease with a smile even though your eyes are heavy lidded from lust and you move your other hand behind you and over your own shoulder, finding the back of Astarion’s head and pushing your fingers into his hair again, encouraging him to continue.

Astarion playfully scoffs at your words and his fingers part your folds for a moment, then he pushes two of them inside of you.

“I’m confident because your body does not lie, love.” the vampire teases when you moan and the wet sound of his digits working your core fill your ears, only making his words more true.

“My body and I may not agree sometimes.” you can’t help but chuckle and you try to look at him, quickly being met with his crimson glowing gaze and a smirk on his bloody lips.

“Then I have to make sure that both are in harmony with each other.” he says and makes you mewl when the fingers are removed from your body, making you crave for him to fill that emptiness immediately.

“Astarion…” you whisper and feel him reach deeper between your legs as he moves his hips away from you for a second, then guides the tip of his weeping cock at your entrance with his fingers, his gaze locked on yours.

“This - for eternity. You moaning my name...”

And with that he thrusts himself into your cunt, making you cry out and grip his hair tighter in response. His fingers, now done with their task, find your hip and grip it tightly as he begins to thrust deep and hard. Astarion’s eyes quickly become clouded with passion as he looks at you and he gives you a brief kiss.

“Open that pretty mouth of yours and let me hear you.” he says with an already audible strain in his voice and you briefly bite the tip of your tongue before he drives a particularly deep thrust into you, making you moan before you can even think of allowing or stopping yourself. “There we go, perfect.” he smirks and kisses the side of your neck again, lapping at the blood that seeped out of the bite mark he left there just moments earlier.

You hold onto his head and keep yourself up with a palm and a knee on the edge of the bed but you don’t know how long you will be able to stay like this as Astarion pounds into you, making you moan with his every thrust, making your body shiver and your back arch as if on command. You feel your climax approaching and you give into the feeling before Astarion suddenly stops, making your last moan falter on your lips.

“Huh?” you ask while panting and get even more confused when you feel his length leave your sopping cunt with a wonderfully wanton sound, making your arousal leak and smear against your inner thigh of the leg that’s still on the floor.

“Get into bed.” Astarion instructs with huskiness in his voice and you have to pause for a moment, trying to make your mind comprehend his words, but when you finally understand you let go of his head and climb into the bed on all fours.

You feel him climb in after you and with one hand he guides you to lie on your side, then makes you move onto your back as he crawls on top, his knee pushing your leg apart and leaving you spread for him. Unceremoniously he thrusts into you again the moment he’s in position and you cry out, grasping at his back and feeling the scars there. Astarion lowers his head and drags his tongue over your nipple before speaking again.

“Just a little longer, love, for me.” he breathes against your skin but you can’t stop yourself from wrapping your legs around his hips, locking your ankles on the small of his back, urging him to go faster, deeper, harder.

“Astarion, I-“

You yelp when his teeth pluck at your nipple and then graze your neck in a span of couple seconds. You lean your head back for him, feeling Astarion’s fangs on the other side of your neck, the one that doesn’t have his bite mark yet, and your nails dig into the skin between the markings on his back as you urge him.

“There, there…” Astarion responds with a strained moan of his own, his thrusts quickly becoming erratic as he chases his own climax, timing it with yours. “Let go, my love.” you feel him panting against your lips, a pleasurable sigh so hot against your skin when it leaves his throat and you finally do let go.

You are sure you cry out his name when your bliss takes you, when your body wraps tightly around his, your cunt clenching on his cock and urging him to spill himself within you, which Astarion does the moment he hears his name like a prayer on your lips. You hear him moan your name too, first against your lips, then into the crook of your neck as he lowers his head for last few thrusts.

When he stops and your body begins to relax, you remain still, clinging to him for as long as you can as you gasp for air and try to return from whenever this feeling of overwhelming pleasure took you.

“You’re so beautiful.” you hear Astarion whisper and you smile, finally unclenching your thighs and releasing his hips. At the same time you gently stroke his back, scars and all.

“Am I?” you open your eyes and smile, feeling sweat on both of your bodies quickly cooling.

“You are. And you will be beautiful forever.” Astarion lifts his head, his curls sticking to his forehead. His smile is gentle and relaxed when he lifts his upper body from you and looks down upon you. “Do you still want to be mine?” he asks and you know exactly why he asks – one last chance for you to change your mind. Somehow, this time you know that if you did exactly that, he would let you walk away. The feeling of this knowledge is comforting and perhaps it’s the last thing you needed to truly, fully make peace with your decision, with what is about to happen, with the transformation that will change your life forever.

“Yes. I want to be yours. Your lover and your consort.” you feel weird saying the last word, you didn’t imagine yourself in a position like this, you were always sure that you will forever dwell underground with other society’s undesirables. But Astarion wants to elevate you from that, you can see that in his eyes even now, you could hear it in his words when he spoke to you about freedom just earlier.

You want him.

“Thank you.” he suddenly says and the small smile you had disappears as you look at him with mild confusion. “Thank you for trusting me and giving everything that you are to me.” he says and with that he leans to your neck again.

The sharp, piercing pain is not unpleasant when his fangs pierce your skin one more time and you hear yourself inhaling sharply only because this bite is stronger than before. Astarion moves his body, pulling out of you in the process so that he can cradle you in his arms as you listen to him gulping down your life’s blood with greedy swallows. At first your fingers cling to his sweaty back, but then you begin to feel your grip loosening until you don’t have strength anymore to keep your hands up.

As your arms fall to the bed next to you and the canopy over above you begin to blur, you realize you don’t have a shadow of doubt. You trust him, even if dying feels scary right now.

Before darkness consumes your mind and vision, one last thing you feel is Astarion’s arms holding you firmly against him and the weight of his body on top of yours, as if he’s shielding you. And then…

…nothingness.

“This is my beloved consort, that I wanted to introduce to you all as soon as possible!” Astarion’s voice is loud as it booms through the ballroom of his palace. His hand is around your waist, a palm resting on your rear possessively.

He picked the dress for you, fancier even among the dresses you had bought yourself when you work for richest patriars. A wonderful piece of black and blue made from velvet and chiffon, all embroidered with golden threads. A dress made to match the outfit Astarion himself is wearing.

You have a hand on his shoulder as you gaze upon those that gathered tonight. Your Lord gave you exactly three days to adjust to your new state of being and you suspect only because sending invitations to infernal allies and dark associates takes time despite the speed of magical means. He was burning with desire to show you off the moment you woke up after your death, pride brimming in every word he spoke to you since then. And now as you stand by him, still trying to adjust to the feeling of fangs in your mouth and the strange hunger that is lingering just beneath the surface of fullness, your eyes sweep over the see of faces, so different but also so alike in many ways.

This is going to be your life from now on.

And it makes you excited.

“Isn’t she beautiful?” Astarion asks the guests and most of them cheerfully agree. Who would in their right minds disagree with the Vampire Ascendant after all, especially while they’re in his domain.

“Stop bragging.” you turn to whisper in his ear with a smile and Astarion looks at you with a grin that would look evil if you didn’t know him better already.

“Let them see what they cannot have. You, my dark consort.” Astarion makes you turn to him chest to chest and you feel his palms find positions on your lower back and between your shoulder-blades as he looks into your eyes so deeply it’s like he’s trying to read your thoughts. “You’re mine, forever. I don’t want anyone to forget that, little love.” he says with such determination it warms your unbeating heart.

You smile and caress his cheek gently, feeling wonderful warmth under your touch, then he leans in and presses a kiss so fierce against your lips that it makes you bend backwards, and you would fall if not for his strategically placed hands. You chuckle and kiss him back, then you hear some applauds, not quite sure how to feel about those, but when Astarion breaks away from the kiss, he looks into your eyes once again.

“The most beautiful red I have ever seen. Prettier than blood itself.” he whispers, making you smile softly at him, and then he helps you straighten your back, once again turning to the crowd.

You glance at the faces again, noticing that they are seem curious about you, or maybe this union between you and Astarion overall, but it matters none. Who are they to judge your happiness now that you finally have it?

Then with one hand Astarion gestures widely over the crowd with a big, arrogant grin on his face and speaks loudly again:

“Let’s celebrate!”

#baldur's gate 3 #reader insert #bg3 #x reader #astarion #ascended astarion #female reader #astarion x reader #astarion x female reader #astarion fic #astarion smut #lord astarion #darkness of seven #my fics

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totally-neptune-official · 3 months

Text

A Gimmick-Verse Story : Mars vs Grass and Family Confusion

Mars was a very well known red planet, not one of the large ones like her cousins.

Mars had sent out universe wide letters to anyone listening, talking about how she talks to herself and other gimmicks she happens to be.

Although She stated it was a form of coping, Dromaeosaur, Sealand, JCJenson, Ursa, and Nova Scotia had advised that Mars goes outside and touch some lovely green grass.

No Frills had drawn a picture of mars with an arrow pointing to a patch of grass.

Asteroid Belt had also shown a picture of the word “Touch” spelled with grass as well

But no attempts had worked.

Soon enough though, their cold distant cousin Neptune got involved.

“Mars, grass is friend” Neptune stated, smiling and showing mars a picture of a sign saying “Friend” with trees and grass in the background.

Mars decided to decline this offer from Neptune and instead gave her a gift she couldn’t ever reject “Maple Syrup”.

“Take this maple syrup and shut up nepnep” Mars said, holding a handful of maple syrup in her arms.

This small action changed everything, within seconds Neptune was charging at Mars for the delicious thick liquid she grew to love. However, where Neptune goes, WM follows. (I didn’t mean to word “delicious thick liquid” like that my bad guys)

WM sprayed Neptune with three whole bottles of water telling her no.

“It’s a gift from family” Neptune said, huffing.

“Yea but you can’t have syrup” WM replied, poking tunes face before looking at Mars. “Please mars i’m trying to weed Tune off the maple syrup”

Mars stood there watching the pair as Neptune had made gestures to a near trash can as to say WM’s statement “saying no to maple syrup is bullshit”

“I will hit you with a shoe” WM says jokingly.

Neptune could be considered a syrup addict with how she responded saying “My maple syrup…give me, give me” (Side note : i got inspired by the hobbit and lord of the rings btw)

Mars had decided to sit back and watch it all unfold….that was until Goose came into the picture. Turns out goose had a pixelated one of WM’s many water bottles and also sprayed Neptune.

“NO MAPLE SYRUP FOR ANYONE” Goose yelled out.

Mars didn’t seem to like seeing all this chaos forming so she sided with her cousin.

“Yeah, let my bro have the maple syrup!” Mars stated siding with her cousin.

“Yeah i accept the gift” Neptune said, taking the maple syrup and going back into her tower that was made by WM for safety purposes.

Goose gets ready to spray more and gets ready to yell more but is stopped by mars.

“Too much noise can’t hear ya mate, nice spray you got there though.” MArs spoke, holding more maple syrup.

Goose moved back and yelled “AHHHH GET IT AWAYYYYY” quickly throwing 10 Canadian geese at Mars.

“ATTACK!!!” Goose yelled once more pointing at Mars.

I wouldn’t say this could go wrong butttt….yeah it went wrong fast because almost immediately Mars stands tall grabbing an asteroid.

“Yeah I’m not scared of those anymore-” Mars baseball threw the asteroid and made the geese explode.

Goose stood there shocked and devastated “MY CHILDREN!!!!!”

Neptune who watched from above in her tower was surprised to see this happen. “Oh shit man…Mars that was a little much man” Neptune spoke, drinking maple syrup with goose spraying at her tower saying no maple syrup.

“Ya think? I can’t be bothered carding for them anymore Neptune, neither should you. Anything associated with Earth is not worth it anymore” Mars said with a somewhat serious tone.

“My fiancee is from Earth, the only things i care about from Earth is them, Canada and Maple Syrup. What did Earth do to make you hate it so much?” Neptune asked, noticing the shift in tone.

“Ah, right… well i don’t hate the Earth, i just don’t want to care about it anymore. I’ve had enough, enough treading on needles, enough fights, enough faking everything just to keep “ the special planet” happy. Earth doesn’t need me, I don’t need her either. I used to be alone…I can do it again.” Mars stated.

Neptune noticed that it seemed like Mars was speaking to herself but also not at the same time? She couldn’t tell, Blue and Red, ironic colors.

Neptune nodded “That’s understandable my sibling of the solar system. Plus you have me man, red and blue you don’t need everyone.”

“Heh- our orbits are pretty fat apart mate, but thanks anyways” Mars said, more relaxed.

“Well then distant cousins and your welcome” Neptune replied, shaking mars hand after climbing down the tower.

Mars and Neptune had shook on it having a cousin bonding moment.

—---

The End

Shout outs : @the-red-planet-mars @bored-dromaeosaur @the-principality-of-sealand @truly-jcjenson @ursa-major-actually @the-province-of-nova-scotia-real @no-frills-fr @definitely-waste-management @the-official-goose-god

guys I’m sorry it’s so long i tried to break down as much as possible to make it simple.

I also only tagged the gimmicks who had a speaking role so I apologize for those I didn’t tag but who reblogged 😅

anyways hope you folks enjoyed im gone drink water and get some sleep peace out ✌️

#neptune post #authors of tumblr #Didn’t let me post for 10 minutes

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bekaroth-reads · 1 year

Text

Astarion x Reader

[I’ve finally gotten some time to play the full version of BG 3, unfortunately not enough to get past what was available in the early release versions. Hopeful to write more characters when I run into them. For the time being, though, I’m more than happy to show love for everyone’s favorite vampire. Technically a x reader, but also sort of for x Tav too. Not proof read, my tablet’s about to die and I want to get this up, lol]

The rain was steadily coming down. It wasn’t flood levels or anything drastic like that, but there was enough that you didn’t want to go out unless you absolutely had to. You were thankful that the tent you had gotten ended up being a nicer one that kept all of the water out. You weren’t the only one thankful for that either.

Astarion, seeing how clouded over the sky was, refused to budge an inch. The others in the group wanted to keep going, not finding a chance of rain a good reason to stall progress, especially seeing as the next town was only about a day or so away. You had volunteered to stay back with him, using the excuse that you didn’t think anyone in the group should be left alone. In all honesty, you didn’t feel like being caught in the rain either.

It seemed like you made the right call too. You were wondering if you had been overly cautious like the others thought, but once things started to pick up you were glad you weren’t either trying to rush the rest of the way to the town or setting up tents in the rain.

Your vampiric traveling partner had himself sat snuggly in the tent, not risking getting caught in too much water moving too quickly. While Astarion did have a tent of his own, the one that you had gotten was more waterproof, so he insisted that he be allowed to stay in it. You didn’t have too much of a problem with that as there was enough room in the tent for both of you.

Or at least you didn’t think you did. Now that you were out here in the rain checking on the pikes that were holding the tent down while he was comfortable and dry inside, you were starting to think you weren’t too much better off than everyone else. Finally, after walking around the tent to make sure everything was still tightly fastened down, you finally went back inside.

“Oh, for-“ Astarion exclaimed as you opened the tent, “Close the bloody door!”

“The door?” You question as you take off your boots and your cloak off at the front of the tent.

“You know what I mean.” He huffed out and lounged back onto his bedroll. “I’m mean, really! I knew you could be dense but I didn’t think it was that bad-“

Astarion gave a comical, “oof,” when you threw your wet cloak onto his face.

When he pulled it from his face, his red eyes seemed to burn; you couldn’t quite tell with what emotion, but you did know something was coming.

It turned out that something was him as in a flash he had tossed the cloak aside, and pulled you down to the ground.

“Just like when we first met. What happy memories~” Astarion purred darkly as he held you down.

“I distinctly remember there being a knife involved.” You pointed out at the lack of things pointed at you.

“Mmm, you would remember that delicious, little detail. Should’ve known you were the type to enjoy that sort of thing.”

You swallowed at the lump in your throat, trying not to give him any indication that you were at all affected. You went to retort, but Astarion was quick to stop it.

“Shh, shh, shh, shh- Hush. Don’t even think about lying to me. In fact,” his hand moved up to cover your mouth, “how about you don’t speak at all. If you really want to feel something sharp of mine against your throat, duckling~”

Astarion leaned closer, grinned so that his pearly, white fangs peeked out from his lips, and hummed, “I’ve got the perfect, little tools right here.”

There was a slight gasp from his mouth when he opened it wide enough to properly bare his fangs that seemed to magically draw one from you. The chill from his skin sent a shiver down your spine as his cheek brushed against your jaw. His lips brushed against your neck-

-and his index finger moved up from your mouth to your nose, gave it a tap, and giggled a mischievous, “Honk,” into your neck.

Astarion leaned back to sit up and squished your cheeks. “Oh, you should see your face. Absolutely priceless.” He snickered.

Astarion groaned and leaned back onto his elbows, “Listen, I gave something a chance and it didn’t pan out.”

You shooed his hand away from your face and moved over to your bed roll and rolled your eyes. “Sure, if you say so…” then something struck you as you smirked yourself, “Duckling.”

He brushed his fingers through his mess of white curls, but stopped part way as he came to his own realization. “Or… perhaps it worked better than your letting on. It seems memorable at least.”

“Well, so was that dinner we had a few nights ago, but that doesn’t mean it’s good.” You retort.

“Fair enough.”

There was a spell of silence between the two of you with nothing but the sound of the rain hitting the tent with the occasional rumble of distant thunder. It was broken when Astarion gave a drawn out, dramatic whine.

You lied down on your bedroll and acted like you didn’t notice him staring at you. “Well, it seemed like someone should have taken the opportunity when he had it earlier.”

“Speaking of dinner,” he turned to look at you, his garnet eyes reflecting his hunger, “I’m positively famished.”

Astarion moved so that he was closer to you; while technically leaning over you again, it was more playful than predatory. He ran his hand under your chin to catch your attention and turn your head to look at him. “You have no idea how tempted I was to do so.” He sighed.

“Careful, or I might start to think your getting attached to me.” You teased, but there was not bite to it.

Astarion chuckled, a mostly light chuckle with a twinge of a bitter aftertaste. “Don’t get too cocky. I’m never more than friendly acquaintance with anyone.” He pinched your cheek and gave it a little shake. “Even you, my little duckling.”

It seemed that the two of you had quickly formed an inside joke from his attempts at a pet name.

Still not to be completely overcome by his charms, you pushed back with, “Of course. That’s why you were so eager to be so close to me a bit ago.”

“A tactical maneuver.” He brushed it off.

“And, have been flirting with me.”

“What’s a little flirting between friend—ly acquaintances.” He cleared his throat to try and act like he didn’t almost slip up and show attachment.

“And, why you’ve been wanting to bite me the whole evening.”

“And, still do.” He rolled so he was once again pinning you, propping himself up on his arms so he could still look you in the eyes, his usual, suave demeanor making its return.

You instinctively placed your hand on the crook of his neck, which he adored in the secrecy of his own mind. Astarion was more than pleased that he seemed to have flustered you into silence as he brushed his cheek against yours, and whispered, his fang brushing against your ear,

“Now, be good and indulge me in a friendly, little,”

His lips moved to your hammering, stuttering pulse point as he purred,

“Nibble~”

#astarion x reader #astarion x tav #bg3 astarion #astarion

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yootaesowlwrites · 6 months

Text

Don't - Kim Sunwoo

W/C: 7K

Note: Blank blogs will be blocked. I don’t trust y’all, so make sure you have your age in your bio/desc or something on your blog or a pfp. Minors DNI or get blocked!

Prompts: "Don't Cum Yet..."

Warnings: Smut, explicit language, pet/nicknames, nudism, nipple sucking, nipple playing, bruising, clit stimulation, oral (Female & Male receiving), cum swallowing, hair pulling, teasing, blowjob, biting, marking, unprotected sex (reader’s on the pill), riding, aftercare, cockwarming, talking about possible somnophilia.

Age Warning: I will not take responsibility because you wanted to read this, but if you’re under the age of 18+, DO NOT INTERACT OR READ. Do not take this as educational, this is fiction!

You and Sunwoo step back into your apartment after you had left the company where the staff and his group members had thrown a small get-together for his birthday, you remove your shoes and roll your shoulders before letting out a soft sigh, happy to be home and be surrounded by some quietness.

“I love that it’s your birthday, but I feel so tired now, Woo,” You say while turning to him, he removes his jacket and hangs it onto the coat hanger near the door before stepping closer to you.

“If you want, I can give you something that will wake you right up, Jagiya,” He says. You bite the inside of your cheeks, thinking his offer over. “Or, just lay back and let me have some dessert at least, one final dessert for my birthday,” You could feel heat rising to your cheeks as you thought about his head between your legs and your fingers pulling at his locks. “By that look on your face, you’re considering it hard.”

“Can you blame me?” You quickly say before taking hold of his hand. “It’s tempting, Woo, so tempting…” Your eyes slowly move down his chest before moving lower and pausing at his waist. “But… as tempting as it is, it’s your birthday,” You lift your gaze slightly. “I should make you feel like you’re in heaven,” You watch his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows. “Or, to compromise, we could do both.”

“I…” He pauses as he thinks over what you have just said to him. “Like… at the same time, or do you mean one at a time?” You tug on his hand and begin leading him down the hallway towards the bedroom.

“Well, maybe for Christmas we can try the sixty-nine, see how it works for us, but for tonight, I want you to fully focus and feel what you’re going to experience,” You say as you get closer and closer to the bedroom. “Now the next question is, Woo… who’s going to lay back first?” You were suddenly spun right as you entered the bedroom and pushed up against the wall next to the door, you gasped and looked into his brown eyes which were much darker now, his cologne filled your lungs and his warmth immediately surrounded you.

“Well… it’s my birthday, I deserve dessert first,” He says before leaning in closer. “It’s only fair I had to wait the entire day for it,” You could feel his breath fan against your lips before they brushed against you, your hands immediately fell to the hem of his shirt and pulled the fabric upwards, your hands press against his skin as his tugs on your shirt, tugging it upwards. The kiss was sloppy, yet hot at the same time, your breathing was becoming louder as you tried to get enough air into your lungs, you broke the kiss and gasped for air as he tugged your shirt higher, you lifted your hands and let him pull it off you before you grab onto his shirt and also pull it upwards and off, tossing it aside.

“If I knew you were this needy, Woo…” You breathe out as you place your hands on his chest and slowly slide them down his body, feeling every bump underneath your touch from the soft abs on his stomach. “I would have asked if we could take the long way home,” Your hands find the belt around his waist, and you begin working on it, the sound of the metal clinging sends a shock through your body and straight to your pussy.

“Screw the long way home,” He mumbles as he leans closer to press his lips against your collarbone. “I’m relieved you didn’t know how needy I was,” His hands slide between your body and the wall and slowly move them upwards towards the clasp of your bra. You pull the belt through the loops before dropping it to the floor, just as he unclasps your bra. “Maybe any other night we could…” His nose brushes against your collarbone before you feel his lips at the top of your shoulder and his teeth grazing with a feathery touch against your skin as he takes the strap between his teeth and pulls it down your arm. “But tonight, I’m glad we’re home,” He moves his head to your other shoulder and does the same, the bra falls to the floor between you both and his mouth instantly moves towards your breasts.

“I have to admit,” You say as you slide your hand over the growing bulge in his jeans. “I’m kinda glad we didn’t take the long way, otherwise this, right here, wouldn’t be happening now,” You cup him through his jeans, causing him to inhale sharply. “Maybe it would have happened still, but a lot later,” His mouth moves lower and over your nipple, his hot breath fans over the sensitive skin causing your pussy to twitch. “Gosh, Sunwoo…” Your lids flutter as you feel his lips wrap around your nipple and gently suck on the bud, his hand cups your other breast, and he slowly slides his thumb over your nipple. “Hmm…” You feel his other hand slide over your waist, over the curves of your body as it goes lower and lower until his fingers push past the waistband of your pants, and he cups your mound and slowly moves his hand a little lower.

His fingers reach your folds and press down against your clothed folds before rubbing them with your panties, your hand tightens slightly against his jeans as you feel his fingers push a little harder against your pussy, pushing the fabric between your folds, you could feel his cock slowly growing as you rub your hand over his jeans. His fingers slide through your folds, pushing more of your panties between them as he slides them towards your entrance before sliding them back to your clit. “Fucking gosh…” You moan as he circles his fingers around your clit, using your panties to create a faint friction against the bundle of nerves, he slides his fingers back towards your slit and circles it with your panties before sliding his fingers back to your clit and doing the same.

He takes your nipple between his fingers and slowly rolls the bud between the pads of his fingers as wetness continues to pool between your folds with each rub and circle drawn through your panties, you could feel your panties becoming soaked with your juices, and you could hear a faint sound of your wetness sloshing each time his fingers went towards your entrance and back, spreading it over the fabric to create a bigger mess. He tugs on your nipple, and you feel your insides pulling into a knot with that tug as a high slowly begins building. “Sunwoo… Woo, oh… my…” His fingers pause at your clit and your back arches away from the wall as they finally touched the bundle of nerves, he releases your nipple and lifts his head to look at your face.

“You’re so fucking soaked…” He mumbles as he continues to rub your clit through your panties, the fabric causing your breathing to get louder and your heart rate to pick up slightly, your hand begins rubbing faster against his jeans as you try to match the movement of his fingers. “We need to get to the bed,” He pulls his hand away from your pussy, making you whine at the loss of contact and the loss of simulation, he grabs onto the waistband of your pants and tugs them down along with your panties.

“Oh, my fucking…” You gasp as you feel the fabric being ripped away from your throbbing clit, your knees almost buckling beneath you at the rough feeling, you take in a slow deep breath before stepping out of them once they pooled around your ankles, you move past Sunwoo and towards the bed, and he quickly turns to follow you closely, close enough that you could still feel his heat radiating onto you, once you reach the bed he spins you around and places his hands on your shoulders.

“Sit right here and spread those pretty legs for me,” He says. You feel your pussy twitch at his words before sitting down at the end of the bed and placing your hands behind you, leaning back to give him a full view of your fully naked body before slowly spreading your legs, the sound of your wetness squelches as your folds spread apart, and you watch as his eyes roll to the back of his head for a split second.

“Grab a pillow, Woo, you might be down there for a while,” You say and smirk up at him, confidence bursts inside you at the effect you had on the man in front of you, he takes his bottom lip between his teeth for a moment as his eyes move over your body, drinking up everything.

“You’re right, I gotta enjoy my dessert to the fullest,” He says and walks around the bed before grabbing one of the pillows and making his way back in front of you and drops the pillow to the floor, the cold gust of wind from him dropping the pillow blows against your hot wet pussy, and it causes your legs to twitch. He lowers down on his knees in front of you and moves himself closer to you, you lick your lips— feeling how swollen they are— his hair tickles the inside of your inner thighs as he gets closer.

“Sunwoo!” You gasp as he suddenly wraps his arms around your thighs and lifts your legs over his shoulders, his hands grip your inner thighs, and his fingers dig into your skin, surely you would find bruising there the following morning, you look down at him as he stares up at you, inching closer and closer to your pussy. “Sunwoo… fuck,” You mumble and move a hand to the top of his head and curl your fingers into his locks, his chin brushes against your mound before he lowers his head, dragging his chin over your folds before his nose brushes along your mound, he takes in a deep breath before letting out a sigh.

“Fuck, you smell so good,” He mumbles and presses his nose against your folds, a shiver goes through you as you feel him talking right against your pussy. “You’re going to taste just as good,” Without much warning he licks a stripe over your clit causing your back to arch at the sudden unexpected contact, your other hand grips onto the bedding and you curl the fabric between your fingers. “Oh, I was so right,” You feel his nose press against your mound before his tongue presses against your clit and slides it over the sensitive nub.

“Oh, fucking fuck, Sunwoo!” You gasp, your skin feels on fire with each slow lick against your clit, your legs begging you to shut around his head and push him further against your pussy, his breathing was getting louder as his nose was smashed up against your pussy, and it only enhanced the feeling going through your body, the room felt hot, and you could feel your skin starting to get sticky with sweat, your mind felt like it was bouncing from the feeling of his tongue circling and lapping over your clit. “Sunwoo, oh, my fucking…” You suck in your stomach as you feel the knot of tension slowly growing bigger, you press the heels of your feet against his back and curl your toes as the euphoric sensation goes through your body.

“Hmm-hmm, so good,” He mumbles against your pussy, you throw your head back as you gasp when you feel his lips wrap around the little nub, and he sucks on it while using the tip of his tongue to tease it.

“Su-Suuun-wooo,” You moan and shut your eyes as your jaw slacks, and you loudly breathe through your mouth, and you tug at his hair as you feel your body tensing up from the feeling. “Fucking… shit, shit, it’s so gooood,” He releases your clit, and you feel his nose brush over the sensitive nub before his mouth reaches your slit, he pulls back, and your muscles slowly relax, and you take in a few deep breaths. His eyes slowly move over your body, the light shines just right on you, making your skin light up as the faint droplets of sweat coat your skin and with your head thrown back and your chest pushing out, the sight is pure sin and yet heaven at the same time for him.

“Jagiya, does it feel good?” He asks as he slowly rubs his hands up and down your inner thighs, his fingers getting so close to your folds before they move away. “Am I making you feel good?” He turns his head and kisses the inside of your thigh, you could feel his nose and lips smearing your juices onto your skin as he kisses the spot over and over.

“Fuck, yes, yes you are, Sunwoo…” You mumble as you lower yourself down to your elbow. “Fuck… it feels so good…” You lift your head to look at him through lidded eyes, and he can see how dark they are. “I’m getting so close…” Your fingers twitch in his hair, and he could already tell how desperate you were to feel his mouth on you again.

“Then I should get my full dessert,” He says before he leaves one last kiss on your inner thigh and lowers his head between your legs again, his nose settles right beneath your throbbing clit, and you could feel his breathing hit your entrance.

“Fucking g- ooh, Sunwoo…” You gasp as you feel his tongue glide over your slit, lapping at your leaking juices, the warm feeling of his tongue between your folds was making your mind spin, and your grip on his hair tightens and your hips lift off the bed, pushing yourself more against his face. His hands grip your inner thighs, this time much closer to your pussy, and holds you up as he slides his tongue slides inside you and your elbow collapses beneath you, and you fully lay back on the bed. ��SUNWOO!” You cry out as you feel an immense pleasure coursing through your body. “FUCK, SUNWOOOO!” You blink rapidly as you try to keep your eyes open, your vision becomes blurry as pleasure slowly consumes your entire body. “FUCK, FUCK!” Your muscles tense and you sucked your stomach in, your glute muscles tighten as you feel your high approaching you with rapid speed with how he managed to use his tongue inside you, and with how his hands gripped your inner thighs, it felt like he had managed to spread your pussy even more for him to gain better access.

“Hmm, hmm,” He moans into your pussy, feeling wetness growing around his tongue. “Hmfff, hhmmm,” The vibrations from his moans travel up your spine and cause the knot inside you to grow quickly.

“SUNWOO!” You cry out, feeling out of breath as you scream his name, your heart drummed loudly in your ears— and you were almost certain he could hear it as well, — the bedding sticks to your skin as sweat continues to build. “I’M GONNA!” Your back arches as you managed to push your pussy completely against his face, you feel his tongue slide in just the tiniest bit deeper inside you before your mind fell off the edge and straight into a pool of blissfulness. “SUUUNWWWOOO!” Your head turns from side to side as your body shakes with pleasure, and the knot inside you explodes as you come undone around his tongue, you’re practically riding his face with how much your body is shaking.

“SUNWOO!” Fireworks fly past your vision behind your closed lids, and you grip the sheets tightens, twisting, pulling and tugging on them. “FUCK!” Your shoulders press into the mattress as you lift your hips higher, your body felt like it was on fire as your high was slowly making its way through you, his licks begin slowing down as your body slows down and begins calming, and your muscles relax, and you lower your back onto the mattress, your grip on the bedding loosens until you completely release it and your hand in his hair falls away, your mind slowly comes down from the skies, and you’re left trying to catch your breath as he pulls away from your pussy, licking his lips loudly to clean them.

“You taste so good, jagiya,” He says. You open your eyes and lift your head to look at him, his nose, lips and chin are glistening with your juices, which makes you drop your head and take in a deep breath.

“Fucking hell, Woo…” You mumble. “So filthy of you…” He gives your thighs one final squeeze before he unwraps his arms from around them and lowers your legs, your feet dangling inches away from the floor, as you take a moment to gather your thoughts.

“But it’s a good filth also,” He says as he places his hands on top of your thighs and slowly slides them along your thighs before moving them over the creases of your hips, he stands from the floor and leans over you and moves his hands to the mattress to press against it and put all of his weight onto the bed instead. “Right?” You turn your head to look at him.

“Right… hmm,” You mumble as you can smell yourself on him, “A good kind,” You lift your head and press your nose against his. “And now, it’s your turn,” You reach up for his shoulders and grab onto them. “So sit down and lean back,” He tilts his head to press a quick peck to your lips before his warmth disappears, and your hands fall away from his shoulders, you quickly sit upright and grab onto the loops of his jeans before he can move away from the bed. “Wait, wait, just one second,” You undo the button and open the zipper before pulling his jeans down, the bugle that was being restricted by his jeans now created a tent in his underwear, he steps out from his jeans and kicks them aside while your fingers hook into the elastic of his underwear, and you tug on it, tugging him towards you and causing him to stumble a little forward.

“Whoa…” He breathes and places his hands on your shoulders to stop himself from toppling over, your lips press against the middle of his stomach, and you slowly kiss a trail down and over his belly button until you reach the fabric of his underwear and kiss towards his hip as you begin to pull his underwear down, making sure not to have it accidentally get caught on his hard cock, once they reach his thighs you begin to kiss your way down to his pubic bone. “Ohh, shit… Jagiya…” He watches as you kiss over the top of his thighs and over his pubic bone while pushing his underwear lower until they finally pool around his ankles.

“So hard for me,” You say and kiss over his thighs, your cheek brushing against the side of his cock, and you hear him inhaling sharply at the faint touch. “You should sit,” You move your head back and look up at him with a slight smirk on your lips before standing from the bed and motioning with your hands towards the bed as you take a step to the side. “You can have my spot,” Sunwoo sits down in the same spot you were just moments ago, and you watch him pause for a moment.

“It’s wet…” He states and looks up at you, you nod your head before positioning the pillow between his feet using your foot. “How much did you…?”

“Well… I was super wet, and it leaked onto the bed,” You say and lick your lips. “You don’t mind, do you?” Your tone sounds innocent, which causes his eyes to roll to the back of his head.

“Fuck, you’re such a damn tease, Jagiya,” He groans. You lower to your knees in front of him and place your hands on top of his knees.

“Like you’re complaining about it,” You say and slide your hands along his thighs while leaning your head closer, your lips make contact with the top of his knee, and you slowly kiss up his thigh, your hands reaching close to his cock, and you move one hand towards it and extend a finger. “You sounded a little sensitive earlier…” Your finger touches the side of his cock, and you slowly slide it along his length with a feathery touch.

“Fuuuckk,” He groans, your finger reaches the top of his cock, and you circle your finger around the tip, collecting his pre-cum onto it.

“Hmm, leaking also…” You say and slide your finger down his cock, leaving a trail of glistening pre-cum behind on it, before moving your head closer to his cock. “So hot of you,” You whisper while batting your eyes up at him. “Know what’s going to be hot also?”

“What?” He breathes out. You move your finger away from his cock and place it on his thigh and draw small circles on his skin, leaving a trail of his glistening juices behind.

“This,” You say before your lips wrap around the spot you had just drawn on, the taste of his salty pre-cum bursts onto your tongue as you slide it over the sticky liquid, cleaning it while sucking on the spot.

“Oh, fucking…” He groans and moves a hand to the back of your head, you were definitely going to leave a dark purple bruise on his skin. “Fuck, that’s it, mark me right up,” Your hand rubs over the outside of his thigh as you suck on his skin, your other hand was rubbing at the top of his thigh, feeling his skin becoming slippery underneath your touch. You lift your head away from the spot and admire the mark as it changes colour.

“I was right,” You say before dipping your head lower. “It was hot,” Your breath fans against the underside of his cock, and you hear him let out a whimper, which quickly intrigues your mind. “Did that feel good?” You purposely blow air against his cock again and watch his reaction closely.

“Yyy/nnn, jagiya, fuck…” He whines, and you feel his grip tighten against the back of your head, you slowly nod your head before turning it to the side and pressing a soft kiss to his thigh.

“I’ll get to it in a moment…” You mumble before you fully press your lips against his thigh, this time he could feel your teeth threatening to bite into his skin, and he had to force himself to sit still and not buck his hips, you were leaving another mark while testing the waters at the same time with what he was comfortable with.

“J-jagiya…” He mutters as he feels your teeth sink a little more into his skin, you pull back, causing silver strings of saliva to break off and fall onto your chin and on his thigh, you glance up at him before digging your fingers into his thighs. “FUCK!” He throws his head back, and you watch as his Adam’s apple bobs up and down as he breathes in and out rapidly, you glance down at your thighs and the marks he had left behind already appearing.

“Now we’re matching, baby!” You say and move your head towards the top of his thigh, moving your hand away and to the back of his leg, you hear him let out a breathy laugh as he lifts his head to look down at you.

“You’re right…” He says. “We’re matching with that, but I don’t remember leaving a hickey on your thigh,” His hair had fallen over his eyes and some strands were sticking to his forehead from the sweat. “You’re giving more than I did,” He watches as your lips part, and you move your head closer to his thigh. “Ja-jagi-iya…” Your mouth makes contact with his skin, and this time he can’t help but buck his hips upwards as your teeth sink into his skin. “FUCK, fuck, oh, my fucking…” His cock brushes against the side of your face, leaving behind a trail of his pre-cum on your cheek, the bed creaks at the sudden movement. “Fuck, you’re going to be the end of me,” He was breathing loudly, and his muscles were already tensing, you slowly pull away and lick your lips.

“Are you complaining?” You ask and move your hand to the base of his cock, you watch as he stops breathing for a moment as your fingers wrap around him.

“I would go happily, though,” He finally says once you have your hand wrapped around him. “I would meet my end with a smile, because fuck… you make me feel so good,” You smile and slowly slide your hand along his length. “I wouldn’t even realise I had died, because you make me feel like I’m in heaven already,” Before your hand reaches the tip of his cock, you slide it back towards the base.

“Oh, I’m flattered, Woo,” You say and lean closer, you lift your gaze to look up at him before softly blowing cool air against the tip of his cock that was coated with his pre-cum, his other hand grips the edge of the bed as he feels your cool breath blow right against it, cooling it off around his cock that felt like it was on fire, and the feeling of it was sending his mind into a spiral.

“Fuck… oh, fucking…” He groans. You slide your hand to the top of his cock, collecting the glistening liquid onto your hand before slowly spreading it over his length. “Dear, fucking… you, you’re so…” You blow down his length, causing a shiver to go through him as you cool off the hot juices that were being spread over him. “I…” The way the two different temperatures felt on his cock was edging him closer to a release, something he didn’t want to happen so soon, not when you had just barely started and hadn’t had him in your mouth yet. “Fuck… jagiya…” Your hand moves slowly along his length, and it feels like you were slowly trying to pull an orgasm out of him.

“Feels good, hmm?” Your tone was low as you asked, your eyes so dark with lust and mischief. You slide your hand to the top of his cock and pause your movement and lean closer, only the tip was peaking out from around your hand.

“Sh-shit, oh…” He moans as he can feel your breathing hit right against it. “Fuuucckkk,” His voice was shaky as your tongue pressed against the slit on his cock and slowly licked over it, the texture of your tongue against his sensitive cock was making it hard for him to control himself. “Sh-shit, o-oh, my fuc-fucking…” Your tongue disappears from the tip, and you slide your hand down his cock. “Shit…” Beads of sweat were slowly beginning to roll down his neck and his hair was almost completely wet and sticking to his face, you twist and turn your hand around his cock, causing a squelching sound to go through the room from how wet his cock already was of his pre-cum.

“Hear that, Sunwoo?” You ask before sliding the tip of your tongue around the tip of his cock, another shuddering breath leaves him, and you watch as he sucks in his stomach. “Fuck, it sounds so dirty,” You lower your head and press your tongue against the underside of his cock.

“Ja-jagiya…” He breathes, you flatten your tongue against his cock and slowly lick upwards, keeping your eyes on his face, his lids flutter and his mouth opens and closes as he gasps for air as your tongue reaches the top of his cock, and you wrap your lips around him. “FUCKING HELL!” He throws his head back at the sudden warmth that engulfed his cock. “Shit, shit, Y/n, ja-jagiya…” His grip on the back of your head tightens, and you feel him trying to push your head down on his cock. You let him and his cock slide deeper into your mouth, and you hallow your cheeks while turning and twisting your hand around the base of his cock. “Fucking… I, so… good,” You could hear the strain in his voice as he moaned from pleasure, you slowly took more of his length into your mouth, and he could feel your breathing hit his pubic bone as you did.

“That feels so fucking good, oh, shit…” His eyes rolled to the back of his head before his lids shut in pure bliss, it felt like he was so close to blowing and filling your mouth with his load. You pull back and only keep the tip in your mouth as your hand slides up and down, spreading your saliva and his pre-cum over his cock, he could feel his balls slowly starting to tighten and a faint throbbing feeling starting to form at the tip of his cock. “Fucking, I’m… I’m close, I’m go-going…” At his words, you pull back from his cock with a pop, which causes his entire to shake and a shiver to shoot up his spine. “SHIT!” His eyes fly open, and he lifts his head to look down at you. “Why’d you stoooppp?” He whines out, and fuck, did you love the sound of him whining for you.

“Don’t cum yet…” You say and slide your hand along his length before pulling it away once your hand reaches the top, strings of pre-cum break off from your hand, and it hits the top of his thighs, making him gasp at the sudden cold feeling hitting his thighs, you bring your hand to your mouth, and he watches you carefully as you slip your tongue past your lips and press it against the palm of your hand and slowly lick a stripe along your palm. “Hmm, so good, Woo…” You place that exact hand on his shoulder before pulling yourself upwards to straddle his lap, pressing your knees into the mattress, his cock press against your pussy, and you slowly roll your hips over his cock, making it slide between your folds which caused your juices to spill down his cock. “Not yet, I want to be inside you.”

“Fucking… so warm, fuck…” He whimpers as he moves his hand away from the back of your head and moves it to your hips, gripping onto them and holding onto you tightly, you move your hands between your bodies and wrap them around his cock before slowly sliding him between your folds, the squelching sound of your wetness reaches your ears, and you feel your insides doing a flip, the thought of his cock stretching you out was already affecting you. “I’ll fill you so good, jagiya, but put it in now, please,” You lift your hips slightly before moving him towards your entrance.

“Since it’s your birthday, I can’t have you wait too long,” You say before slowly sinking onto his cock, you release it and move your hand to his shoulder while slowly feeling his girth stretch your walls and fill you. “Fucking… ohhh, so good, hmm, Sunwoo… oh,” You moan and shut your eyes at the feeling of his length sliding into you, his thumbs press down hard against the creases of your hips as his breathing stops at the feeling of your walls squishing down around him, engulfing him with warmth. “Shit, ohh, uhh,” Once he was fully inside you, you press yourself against his body and take a moment to adjust to him as you were both breathing in deeply and loudly.

“Let me just… fuck, just move a little more onto the bed so you don’t slip,” He says, you feel the bedding slide underneath your knees as he scoots himself further onto the bed. “Okay… this is as far as I can scoot back,” You nod your head against his shoulder before slowly lifting your hips, his cock slides out of you halfway before you roll your hips forward, letting his cock slide back inside you. “Ohh, fuck, so good, so good, jagiya…” He mumbles into the crook of your neck, and one of his hands slides over your back and moves to the back of your neck. “Just like that…” You were slowly picking up speed until you found a rhythm that was just right for you both. The squelching sound of your juices fills the room and the scent of sex fills the air. “Fuck, ohh… my absolute fucking…” You feel his lips press against your neck as he softly kisses it.

“Sunwoo… oh fuck, you always, always… so good around me,” You mumble and lift your head away from his shoulder, he pulls his head back from your neck, and you look into each other's eyes, the sound of skin slapping against skin and the sound of the bed creaking bounces off the walls and the sound of your hard breathing and moans and his grunts and groans fills the room.

“Uhhmm,” He groans as he feels your walls squeezing around him, with the angle you were positioned on top of him, you could feel his pubic bone just barely brushing against your throbbing clit, your chest was sliding against his from all the sweat that’s collected onto your skin and his. “You feel so… good, perfect around me,” You could feel your insides slowly pulling together, and your toes curl at a hot tingling feeling slowly making its way up your legs. “Fuck, you just know… how…” His muscles begin to twitch and pull, he was a lot closer to his release than you were.

“Woo… fuck…” You mumble. You could feel his stomach muscles pulling as your bodies were pressed flush against one another, his thigh muscles were twitching beneath yours as he was getting closer and closer. “Gonna cum for me?” Your mind felt foggy as his cock slides in and out of you, hitting all the right spots inside you. “Gonna fill me up good?” Your words were causing his mind to spin, the way you were just talking to him so casually, yet your words were absolute filthy. “Gonna make it spill out of me?”

“Fuck, baby!” He suddenly says. “Fucking, your fucking words, shit,” You feel his hand on your hip grip you harder and try to help you move a little faster over his cock to get him to where he wanted to be so badly. “Fuck…” He also sounded so desperate. You press your hands down hard on his shoulders, forcing him to lay back on the mattress, his hands fall away from the back of your head, and he grips the bedding instead, his eyes open wide as you move your hands to his chest and lift your hips before lowering them down onto him, his cock sinking in just that little bit deeper. “FUCK!” Your walls squeeze around him, and he feels his mind falling completely blank. “Ja-jagiya…” A hot sensation goes through his cock. “FUCK!” His hips jerk upwards as the tightening feeling in his balls suddenly comes undone, and his eyes shut completely. “Ohh, FUCK, fuck yes, YES, fuck yes!” He chants as his load spills into you, filling your pussy, as you continue to roll your hips at a rapid pace to get him through his high.

“That’s it, Sunwoo, fill me, fucking fill me just like that,” You pant. “Fuck, it feels so good to feel your load inside me and spilling from me, fucking hell…” You could feel the tension inside you getting tighter and tighter. “Is it spilling onto your thighs?” You slide your hand down his chest and over his stomach, feeling his muscles spasm underneath them as he cums.

“Fuck, fuck, so gooooooddd, uhhmm, hmm,” He moans as he turns his head from side to side, you lift your hand away from his stomach and move it between your legs and press a finger against your clit. “AH, SHHIITT!” He could feel your walls pulsing around him as you rub your clit to push yourself towards a high, you throw your head back as you feel the tingling sensation going through your legs slowly getting closer and closer to your pussy.

“I'm gonna…” You breathe out as your eyes roll to the back of your head, your body begins shaking on top of him as you try to keep moving, but it is becoming harder and harder as you get closer to your high. “Su-Sunwoo…” Your lids shut as you begin rubbing your clit faster while moving your hips quicker. Sunwoo begins coming down from the high he was going through and opens his eyes, blinking several times to adjust to the light before moving his gaze onto you, your tits bounced as you tried to get yourself to your high, and he was quickly becoming sensitive to the feeling of your pussy squeezing and moving around him.

“Fuck, let me help…” He mutters before sliding his hand from your hip to your inner thigh, your back arches as you feel his thumb suddenly press down against your clit and roll it underneath the pad of his finger, you instantly move your hand away and press it against his hip.

“Fuuuckk, Sunwoo, Sunwoo, yes, I’m almost…” You moan as you scratch his chest, leaving red stripes behind on his beautiful tanned skin. “Fucking…” Stars suddenly explode behind your lids as he takes the throbbing nub between his fingers and rolls it. “SUNWOO!” The tension inside your body snaps and a flood of pleasure washes over you while your mind is thrown into the clouds. “OHH, OHH!” It felt like your body was floating with how light it felt as you were going through your high, your juices leaked from around his cock and splatter onto his thighs and your inner thighs as you continue to bounce on his cock to get yourself through your high, his fingers continue to play with your clit, easing you through everything. “OH MY FUCKING!” Your legs felt tied, and it felt like they were starting to burn as your movements slowed down. “Sunwoosunwoosunwoo,” You chant before coming to a complete stop on top of him, he pulls his hand away from your pussy and quickly pushes himself into a sitting position to pull your body against his.

“I got you, I got you,” He mumbles as he slowly lays back down, wrapping his arms around your body and you both lay there with his soft cock still buried inside you while trying to catch your breath as the afterglow slowly begins settling in. You felt even more tired now than you had when you had walked in, but you had admitted to yourself, that it was worth it, the tingling sensation between your legs was all worth the tiredness you felt, and you just wanted to sleep right now. “Jagiya… we need to go clean ourselves before you fall asleep,” His voice woke you from the slumber that you were slowly falling into.

“Hmm… in a minute,” You mumble before turning your head, wanting to ignore him and fall asleep on top of him.

“No, no, now, we need to do it now, otherwise you’re going to be asleep soon,” He says. You feel him sit upright, holding onto you tightly, which makes you groan before lifting your head and opening your eyes a tiny bit to look at him.

“Sunwoo… I’m not complaining about your cock being deep inside me right now, are you complaining about being deep inside me still?” You ask, wanting to get your point across that you really really didn’t want to get up right now to go and clean.

“Well, no… I just thought you would want to be clean before falling asleep,” He says. “But if this is the position you want to sleep in, I don’t mind at all,” You nod your head before closing your eyes and lowering your head onto his shoulder. “Just know… I’m gonna get hard inside you during the night.”

“Then… then you can take care of it, inside me, again,” You mumble. He lets out a groan before moving his hands down your ass and cupping it.

“Fuck, you’re being so damn dirty,” He mumbles before standing, your legs instantly tighten around his waist and your arms move to wrap around his neck and lock together behind his head.

“Are you taking us to the bathroom?” You ask, not wanting to lift your head to see.

“No, I’m just moving us onto the bed properly,” He says. “You just said I can have you during the middle of the night when I get hard…” You hear the sheets being tugged open behind you before you feel the bed touch beneath your knees again.

“Did you enjoy how your birthday ended, though?” You softly ask as he lays down and carefully moves you both onto your sides, careful not to accidentally let his cock slide out from you.

“Keep this leg on top of me…” He mumbles as he moves your other leg away from his side so he won’t lay on top of it. “I did, I love how it’s ending also…” His cock shifts slightly inside you, causing you to whimper and him to inhale sharply. “Wish I had a birthday every day if this is how it can end,” You tiredly hum as you find a comfortable position. “I’m so going to get hard… fuck,” Was the last thing you heard before you completely drifted off.

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