#silly me!

[sandwichsapphic]

did he. did he just slap bertie’s ass?

[cupcakeinat0r]

In case y’all forgot, Miguel pays 4 my nails <3

[arcadekitten]

Hi Arcade!! I was looking back at the asks you recently answered, and I saw that you said that we can only get an alarm clock from Hyllindrix, but I remember finding one in the basement of the hospital? Sorry if this is a dumb question, just got a bit confused there haha ^^'

I probably snuck one down there and forgot about it, it's been a while!

[christiiiineecanigulaa]

Christine if we had kids what would you name our kids ☹️ -@jeremyyyheere

i don't know jeremy ❤️❤️ maybe like. a name ❤️ i don't know.

[squirmydonnie]

TW: su!cide, death, unreality (again)

I did something very weird.

But I don't feel bad about it. And I don't know if I should.

I could verbalize it. But that would be a bad idea.

I want to say all of it was. But I'm not sure.

If anyone questions it I already have an idea of what to say. But what I can say doesn't make a lot of sense. And it would raise questions.

So I should think of a few other things.

I don't know.

I feel a lot of anxiety still. But I don't feel like I need to do bad things to myself anymore.

So while I definitely diffused the situation, I don't think I did anything productive.

I probably did something that won't work out in the future.

Not that I won't make me feel better. But it won't be sustainable.

I can't just "do this next time!"- because its not. That kind of thing.

I can't just do this at all really. I shouldn't.

I thought I would feel disgusting but I didn't.

All my other normal efforts did not work.

I wish that they did. But they didn't.

I know why.

I don't need coping mechanisms anymore. I've already done that. And failed. I need real people beside me.

I tried to give myself a better childhood. I tried really hard. I tried to enjoy it.

But everytime it blew up in my face.

So I gave up and moved on to imaginary efforts.

That was until they mostly became un-imaginary and started to hurt me mentally.

But before all that, it was fine.

I had no reason to suspect it wasn't. I was re-parenting myself, making new friends, enjoying life, becoming comfortable with myself. Except. None of this was real.

Part of me knew this. That's why none of these things made me guilty in the first place.

That was until I realized what I had made cookie12 spawn from.

Which was my own death.

Which sounds really bad, but it wasn't involved as much. It was just the catalist for any of the experiences to be made.

And they were great experiences. All caused by my decision to let go of things and become my own person. Whether realizing it or not. Though none of this was real in the first place.

Thinking that you already died isn't exactly I great way to live your life. Which is why I quit all cookie 12 daydreaming.

you can do all that without dying. I doesn't have to be this way. I knew that. But it was too scary.

Despite how nice their life was. It wasn't real life. It was all fake. I still accomplished things under daydreaming but. Most things didn't feel good. That was, unless I was daydreaming.

And they guilt i carried didn't help.

But in quitting I was now alone.

I'm still trying to figure how to deal with that.

While I still valued others, it all felt like I was just going through the motions.

Expecting one day they would all leave me and cut me off.

Until eventually I live in this house with terrible conditions and i daydream all day.

But for me this was a fantasy.

I think slightly more of myself now.

Theres no more daydreaming in my future I hope. And I think I want an okay house. And I think maybe I want to make sure I keep more hoarding in check. And I am not like my Aunt.

I sure do love her a lot, but I don't think she deserves to live like that.

And I'm trying really hard to not believe that myself. Though the truth is, I don't believe I'm deserving of anything. And I don't want anything.

My asks are so small.

And they shouldn't be. But I'm too scared to ask for the things I like.

Anyway.

I did something similar to what I did in 7th grade.

I had put the in my backpack. And then

Well I actually don't remember the rest.

Put cran-grape juice on the floor on purpose. Told my dad it was an accident and had him clean it.

Surprisingly the floor is not stained?

I left the In the backpack for weeks. That's disgusting.

I don't blame myself for it or anything. But it is.

[hotdyke-hardstyle]

here I was complaining that må don't have a live album and all along they've been hiding live tracks on their japanese albums 😤

[iseeyou-dear]

LETHAL COMPANY SHENANIGANS!!

I was bored and decided to draw my experience as a first time player in lethal company!

[when-wax-wings-melt]

🤔🤔it seems that three ap classes might have not been my best idea 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[familyvideostevie]

ummm i thought u knew i have a crush on u smh

cmere lemme give u a kiss

[dorkdipstick]

how to message people without feeling intrusive Oops this isn’t google!

[paintedcrows]

Did anyone tell Ford (bonus doodles: Family Movie Night)

[spider-artdump]

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[almondpiglet]

ppl were drawing mikus from all over so heres habesha miku and her lil twin sibs rin and len!!

[taffy-glitch]

it should be illegal to put ads in apps or sites for solitaire or picross or sudoku tbh. playing classic puzzle games uninterrupted needs to be a HUMAN RIGHT

[virtualplushy]

silliness and sincerity are not opposites btw. they are married. bisexually