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delicioussshame · 4 years

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Okay, so my plans for this one is to publish it by itself on AO3 once it’s done, which, I hope (strangled laughter) shouldn’t be in a year, so do what you want with that info. In the meantime, have the first part of a silly modern AU.

For fuck’s sake, there is no way that’s Luo Binghe.

Shen Yuan had a very clear idea of what Luo Binghe would look like. A white lotus like him had to be a small, shy, bespectacled young man. He’d probably sit by the wall, only daring to glance up occasionally to look for Shen Yuan anxiously.

The man who is refusing a woman’s overture for the third time cannot be him. It must be a coincidence that he’s wearing something that looks like what Luo Binghe said he would have on.

That must be it. Reassured, Shen Yuan starts looking for the little sheep he’d taken under his wing. Could he be the guy engrossed by his phone sitting at his right? Meh, maybe, but-

“Shizun!”

Shen Yuan is instantly mortified. The nickname was cute when they were talking cultivation novels online, but here, in real life? That’s why Shen Yuan insisted on them sharing their real names: to save himself the embarrassment of being the kind of nerd who calls themselves by a fake, geeky name in public!

Then again, since he looks like that, Luo Binghe could be larping surrounded by a crowd while wearing a shirt with a naked waifu on it and still he’d get hit on, Shen Yuan bets. A face this stunning must act as a shield, making him impervious to embarrassment.

Shen Yuan is not impervious to embarrassment. He dashes to the table where, apparently, his disciple is waiting for him. “Luo Binghe.”

He almost flinches under the strength of the beaming smile he’s faced with. “Yes! Shizun! It’s good to finally meet you in person!”

It would be better if you were not calling me Shizun. “The feeling is mutual.” Kind of.

Luo Binghe pushes a paper bag in his direction. “Please accept these as a token of gratitude for your guidance. I know it’s not much, but I hope you can enjoy it anyway.”

Shen Yuan opens the bag with no small amount of trepidation, to discover half a bakery’s stock of desserts, sweets, cakes and other patisseries.

How did he know of Shen Yuan’s weaknesses?

Shen Yuan quickly closes the bag. It would be gauche to eat outside food in a café. “This really wasn’t necessary, though it all looks delicious. Where did you buy them? Did you find a good shop already?”

Luo Binghe shakes his head. “No. I made them, so if they’re subpart, I’m the only one to blame.”

Come on! This guy cooks? At this level? Shen Yuan can feed himself, but a glance was all it took to know how outclassed he was. How is he the shizun here? “I’m sure they’re delicious.” They smell like it, anyway. “So you’re already settled down enough to bake? Moving wasn’t too much of a hardship then?”

“No, everything went well. I’m ready for the term to start.”

He’d better be, since he was accepted at Tsinghua University. How did poor Luo Binghe, who grew up in a small village in the middle of nowhere, swing that, Shen Yuan doesn’t know, but he must be smart as hell. Shen Yuan himself is no slouch, having graduated from Peking University, but it took the “help and encouragement” of his parents and his parents’ many contacts.

Not that they’re here to talk college education, unless Luo Binghe is planning to have much more fun than Shen Yuan did during his own college years. “Still, I suppose that didn’t give you much time for reading.”

“I did read! I had nothing but time on the train, so I finished Shizun’s latest recommendation. As he said, the heroine was the best part. I really liked when…”

This. This is why they’re here: for Shen Yuan to coach Luo Binghe in the ways of decent online literature, stirring him away from complete trash and protecting his innocence from the worst of the worst. He’d known from the first comment Luo Binghe had posted that he was too pure for this world, and that it was his duty as the last bastion of criticism to keep him that way.

He likes to think he did pretty well. Luo Binghe took to his teachings easily. Before he knew it, Shen Yuan had an online friend always eager to get his recommendations and to discuss them with him.

Shen Yuan had thought that maybe Luo Binghe didn’t have that many friends, or that he was socially awkward, but that is very obviously not the case. He can hear the girls oh so coincidentally sitting nearby giggling and congratulating themselves that Luo Binghe hadn’t been waiting for his girlfriend, but only a friend, which meant they still had a chance!

Ha! As if! The only way Luo Binghe didn’t have a girlfriend was if he left her behind to come study here in Beijing. Shen Yuan is sure that won’t last. He’ll probably find someone as soon as school begins.

In the meantime, he might as well take it easy. Reading more books, discovering the cities, getting to know his neighbours; he should take some time to do all this before he is swarmed by his studies.

Still, this is nice. Shen Yuan isn’t the most sociable person ever, vastly preferring to remain indoor by himself to making small talk, but this is a good combination of both! He can talk books with someone who listens to him while drinking his bubble tea and nibbling on snacks. He could get used to this.

“Could I have your phone number?”

Shen Yuan shakes himself back to the conversation. “Sure, but why?” They’ve always written one another before.

“Now that I live nearby, wouldn’t this be easier?”

Shen Yuan swears by the written word, but if Luo Binghe wants to call him from time to time, he can probably deal. “Fine.”

His pupil looks too happy to have gotten a simple phone number. Maybe he really doesn’t have many friends? Aww, don’t worry, you’ll do great here, away from the hicks that couldn’t appreciate you.

“Now that I’m here, there are a few places I’d like to visit. The city had museums, theatres, libraries, everything! Would Shizun mind being my guide?”

Luo Binghe did not need to punctuate that request with puppy eyes. It was overkill. “Are you sure you want to go with me? Shouldn’t you go with friends your age, or your girlfriend?”

“Shizun isn’t old! He’s only eight years older than me! It’s perfectly acceptable!”

Now Shen Yuan feels bad. Luo Binghe might look like… what he looks like, but at eighteen, he’s barely an adult! He should be enjoying his youth instead of wasting his time with a jaded old man like Shen Yuan.

Anyway, he probably just doesn’t know enough people yet. “If you’re fine with me, then I’ll tag along.”

Shen Yuan is once again nearly blinded by the brightness of Luo Binghe’s smile. “I’ll prepare lunch! Does Shizun have favorites?”

“I’m sure anything Luo Binghe prepares will be delicious.” He has no idea, but the stuff he gave him looks like it, at least. At worst, Shen Yuan can definitely afford to pay for a nice restaurant for them both, just like he’ll be paying here.

“Shizun shouldn’t bother. I’m the one who invited him, I should be taking the check.”

There is no way rich, adult Shen Yuan is letting Luo Binghe, a college student on scholarship who just moved to one of the most expensive cities of China, pay for him. Ever. That’s not happening. “First, you did not invite me, I volunteered myself. Second, I’m older. Third, I have a job (kinda, but Luo Binghe doesn’t have to know that) and you don’t. I will be paying for all our expanses, and that’s not negotiable. It’s that or I’m leaving.” He could never live with himself if Luo Binghe had to skip a meal to afford going out with him. The mere idea leaves him queasy.

Luo Binghe frowns, displeased.

A chorus of sighs can be heard from the tables surrounding them.

Shen Yuan estimates there are at least fifteen women of all ages staring at Luo Binghe like he’s a choice morsel now.

They should leave before this degenerates.

Shen Yuan pulls at Luo Binghe. “Let’s go.”

(He valiantly ignores the hissed “Don’t touch him!” coming from a genuinely terrifying fifteen-year-old.)

Luo Binghe seems reluctant to part once they’re out. “We’re meeting Sunday at ten. Shizun can’t forget! I’ll be waiting for him!”

“Don’t worry, I won’t.” His social calendar isn’t busy enough to forget his one deliberate engagement.

_________________

Sadly, his social calendar isn’t empty. His dear parents made sure of it. Shen Yuan doesn’t quite rue the day he agreed to their conditions for funding his lifestyle, but sometimes he really wonders if the sinecure he calls his job, providing him blessed solitude and copious amount of free time, is worth suffering through the parties.

Lucky for him that the feeling is shared between all participants now.

Shen Yuan keeps his face perfectly placid as he reads a passable novel on his phone. The hero is trash, and the heroine, just as bad, but there’s a decent world being built, and he’s honestly interested in the fauna the writer created. It’s not good enough to be recommended to Luo Binghe, but few things are. Only the best for his little sheep.

No one interrupts him. They don’t dare anymore. Long gone are the times where Shen Yuan let himself be bullied. Now, he has focused his hatred of a certain character into an imitation so lifelike he’s now famous for his emotionless expression and his ability to lash out with enough venom that the wounds he leaves behind aren’t healed by their next meeting.

One does what one needs to do to survive the jungle that is the circles of Beijing high society.

His parents would weep if they could see him. “You’ll never find a wife like that,” they’d lament.

Shen Yuan doesn’t care. His two brothers are already married. He’s an uncle. His little sister is more popular than any of her siblings ever were. His parents will have all the heirs they could ever want. They don’t need him to reproduce.

There’s a commotion somewhere at his right.

Shen Yuan doesn’t bother lifting his eyes from his phone until the noise is close enough to be a nuisance. Letting none of his irritation show on his face, he looks for the cause of the disturbance in a nonchalant way that would fool no one.

His heart almost stops when he finds Luo Binghe, Sha Hualing and Xiao Gongzhu hanging off his arms like they belonged there.

What is he doing here!? This isn’t a place where his white lotus should be standing! He should still be unboxing in his apartment, not wearing this frankly obscene suit and flirting with heiresses as wealthy as they were mean!

Oh. This must be it. Shen Yuan did think Luo Binghe would get a girlfriend in no time after all. He must be here as someone’s date, and Luo Binghe being Luo Binghe, he has stolen everyone’s attention from the moment he set foot in the room.

Okay. He has terrible tastes, but whatever. No one is perfect.

Fuck, if he sees Shen Yuan and dashes over while screaming “Shizun”, he’ll ruin his new relationship! Not only will he be revealed as nowhere near as cool as he appears, but being associated with Shen Yuan isn’t a good thing. He’s made sure his disdain for this crew was well-known.

Shen Yuan tries to message Luo Binghe to warn him to stay clear, but, as expected, he doesn’t check his phone.

Fuck his parents. Shen Yuan, very ostentatiously, pretends to get an important but unpleasant message, and starts walking with a speed and certainty that cannot be interrupted.

“-Shen Yuan. Don’t bother. He’s an asshole.”

Shen Yuan doesn’t falter, but only because he’s a pro at this. So what if they’re trash-talking him to Luo Binghe? He knows better.

“I’ll have to make my own mind. Wait here?”

Luo Binghe, what the fuck? Can’t you see how obviously I’m leaving? Don’t come over!

“Hello. My name is Luo Binghe. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Shen Yuan has to answer him now. He can’t just ignore him. That would be unforgivably rude. His mother would find out, and she would never let him live it down. “Shen Yuan. I’m in a hurry, so if you would…” He’s not sure why Luo Binghe is playing along, but if he’s game to pretend they don’t know each other, that’s perfect. Shen Yuan will do the same.

The smile Luo Binghe favors him with is nothing like the one he first shown Shen Yuan, all brightness and childlike joy. This smile is, dare he say it, seductive. He smiles like he’s certain the person he’s gracing with this smile is appreciating every moment of it, as they should. “Please spare me just a moment of your time. I promise I’ll make it quick.”

It turns out Shen Yuan doesn’t know Luo Binghe at all, if he can smile like that and make it look as easy as breathing.

Shen Yuan is not enjoying this. If he had known Luo Binghe would be there tonight, they could have planned something instead of, of whatever this is. His best option right now is to leave, meet up with Luo Binghe later, explain to him his current situation, and arrange things in such a way that his disciple’s rise into power won’t be hindered by his acquaintance to Shen Yuan.

For now, that means being the jerk he pretends to be, so that Luo Binghe can be comforted instead of confronted by those women flocking to him. Shen Yuan will apologise later. “Go run back to whichever of these,” he gestures to the women, “is keeping you fed and well dressed enough to pretend to fit here. I don’t have time to waste on boy toys.” Without giving him a second look, he exits the room as fast as he can without running, inwardly mortified at what he just said.

But not fast enough to miss the mocking laughter and the elated exchanges. “He thinks Tianlang-Jun’s son is a sugar baby!”

What the fuck.

#The Scum Villain Self Serving System #Scum Villain #BingQiu #the AU where SY and LBH are both online friends and fellow socialites

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pepperful-qt · 4 years

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hi can u write smth on like headcanons on what type of person would tsukki tendou iwaizumi and kenma crush on 👁👄👁

ooh funfun. this is something i do a lot for characters i write about to make the reader character realistic, so this is right up my alley :3 this focuses primarily on personality rather than physical types (with a small exception)

*just a heads up, this is LONG

the type of person they crush on w/ Tsukishima, Tendou, Iwaizumi, & Kenma

*****

Tsukishima

for Tsukki it wouldn’t necessarily be someone exactly like him, but they’d have definite similarities

they’d earn his respect before they’d get his heart

hands down this person needs to have a thick skin. i think generally Tsukki doesn’t outright insult or harshly tease (like with Hinata & Kags) the people he really cares about or has affection for (look at his relationship with Yamaguchi), but he is blunt and sometimes unintentionally snaps or is just straight up mean

if someone is easily affected by that, it’s a no go, sorry

not to say they couldn’t get their feelings hurt, and he would feel bad especially if his crush had already developed, but initially there would need to be a resistance or retort to that kind of thing. they’d understand that his words come from a place of both honesty and care, and any lashing out is just a result of stress and unresolved emotion

yeah he’d be attracted to intelligence and wit

part of me just thinks he enjoys mental stimulation and someone who can make him think not only piques his interest in the person but also makes him enjoy and look forward to spending time with them

at the same time, being able to enjoy comfortable silence is important too

and wit. he’d definitely tease someone he has a crush on though and i’ll tell you why

he has two goals: get them flustered or get them to smile/laugh genuinely

he’d love someone that can tease back, and makes him work for a reaction

and--this is important--makes him smile and laugh

speaks fluent sarcasm

not a pushover, and not afraid to call him out when he goes too far

they probably have weird habits or specific tastes or something, which he picks up on as the perceptive guy he is occasionally he uses them as fodder for teasing

they’d be someone with layers ha shrek or with personas they switch between easily, like going from sweet to stone-faced roaster

to tack onto the mental stimulation, you know how Yachi said Tsukki treats everything logically and approaches his blocking like a difficult test question? to an extent the same would apply to that person

he’d be figuring out how they tick, what makes them laugh, etc, and in the process of that it turns into a different kind of interest

it takes him a bit to figure out why exactly he likes seeing their smile or spending time with them, or why he cares so much

a certain subtle air of confidence

i think Tsukki would appreciate music taste

someone who is caring and generous, but doesn’t make a big deal out of it

they’d quietly offer help to a classmate if they noticed they’re struggling, or bring back an extra drink for him from the vending machine like it’s the most casual thing in the world

someone that cares about themselves, but not obsessed with themselves

to quote a favorite song of mine: sweet with a mean streak (not mean really, but not afraid to bite back)

* * *

Tendou

simply put, it wouldn’t be any average person

there would be something about the person that initially caught his eye, something unique that makes them stand out just a little

examples of this could be: a sharp tongue, a book or manga they always have on their desk, a keychain, dyed hair, wearing headphones all the time (he wonders what they’re listening to)

these would be things that make him interested and start paying attention to the person, eventually even striking up a conversation

in terms of personality, I think he’d enjoy someone with a sense of humor. obviously we know he can get along with most people regardless of that (ushijima) even if not everyone understands him, but someone that isn’t thrown off by his dramatic personality and responds in kind would definitely excites him

he likes to chatter, so a good listener and/or someone that’s a good conversationalist would be great tbh

and i’ll just say it, if this person is a manga/anime fan, or just knowledgeable on pop culture in general immediate bonus points. shared passions are great

an acknowledging smile or greeting, especially before they’re acquainted, actually goes a long way bc he has a history of being shunned and mocked by his peers. just that simple kindness which is unfortunate that not treating someone like that would be seen as kind is really important to him before he realizes it

a huge thing i think for him is feeling comfortable being himself around them. that itself allows him to be more open with his emotions and actually develop a crush

so going back to humor and a teasing relationship, it would need to be the type that doesn’t insult things like looks or anything like that. he has a history of insecurity that is still probably present, even if he’s mostly dealt with it, but again, being comfortable is huge. tasteful and dumbass humor only

someone who’s not afraid to say what’s on their mind. he appreciates that kind of directness, and finds it entertaining to an extent

there’s also a certain unpredictability and spontaneity with this person that keeps him on his toes and excites him. he loves a challenge

he’d love someone who shamelessly compliments him. truthfully it’s a bit of an ego thing, but in a specific way:

for Tendou, volleyball is his safe haven. that’s where he grew his confidence and skill and made his friends, so it feels nice for him to have someone appreciate the things he’s good at and cares about when he’s worked so hard for it

and he loves looking and feeling cool, and being showered in compliments is a great confidence booster heyhey seratonin

he’d love to make them laugh

if they compliment something like his looks, humor, passion, etc that will always really touch his heart. he’d brush it off with an “i know right~?” but in reality he’s freaking out because those are important parts of his self that have really been ignored or unrecognized by most people

this person would become another safe haven where he feels accepted and confident, and genuinely enjoys being around <3

* * *

Iwaizumi

the first thing i thought of for Iwa is someone authentic

a person who is true to themselves and the people around them

he despises fake people. those types were usually the ones always confessing to Oikawa or improving themselves for him. he just thinks it’s wrong

a nice laugh. i don’t mean pretty and refined necessarily, but one that is genuine and contagious and unforced

maybe it is a naturally pretty or refined laugh, but what matters is that it’s a laugh that is theirs, not for anyone else. that’s what’s attractive to him and makes his heart speed up when he hears it

a person who is thoughtful, considerate, and compassionate. like Tsukishima, he appreciates the quiet type of kindness

but he finds it amusing when they get just a little flustered when another person points it out

another little thing, but he’d probably find someone who’s a bad flirter absolutely adorable

he’d appreciate someone emotionally intelligent and perceptive

this is a person that is usually aware of how others are feeling and is able to adjust themselves to be the most effective in that situation

for example, they can adjust their own behavior to make someone feeling nervous at ease or defuse an angry person getting out of hand

this means their advice and comments are taken much better

tbh i could see him liking someone both reserved or incredibly expressive

so they could be the type that’s an extroverted hard-to-hate ball of sunshine, or a calm individual who’s respected and whose presence is appreciated by everyone

either way, he’d notice it

this is really the exception to the ‘disliking fake people’ thing

and he’s a hot-headed, tough-love kind of guy. his caring nature is often hidden behind that behavior

so he’d admire that kind of social ability and understanding

another thing that i immediately thought of for what he’s attracted to: passion and ambition

what their passion is is less important than the fire in their eyes when the topic comes up, or they talk about their aspirations and huge, sometimes unattainable goals

this doesn’t mean they have their life figured out, but they care both about the future and living in the moment

this is just a hunch, but he’d probably be more inclined to like an athlete or someone that takes care of their body and physical conditioning

someone who challenges him to be better. someone who understands what it means to be proud and understanding your own imperfections at the same time

a vocal supporter

whether it’s yelling his name from the stands when he makes a spike, or encouraging him to follow his passions after high school, or bragging about him to their friends, having someone unapologetically express their belief in him just makes his heart soar

but really, he likes someone who can cheer him on and tell it like it is when he needs it. he’s a pretty tough cookie so he doesn’t mind bluntness (actually prefers it)

i see him liking someone who can surprise him too

the kind of person to hit him up at midnight to go for a drive under the stars or have a dance party in the park to music from a bluetooth speaker

a passionate, authentic, and level-headed adventurer

* * *

Kenma

i’ve written so much Kenma recently lots of these traits are probably obvious lmao

first things first, he just needs to be able to vibe with them

it sounds obvious, but it’s really important. just being able to exist and not feel pressure to be someone he’s not is huge

another boy who loves comfortable silence, or someone who can talk and not mind him being minimally responsive sometimes because he is listening he’s just quiet

he’s an actions>words type of person though

so if they ask about his passions and actually show interest in him that’s great, and he notices, but following through is even better

examples: remembering his favorite flavors, engaging in conversation about the game he’s playing then the next day asking if he beat that level he was stuck on, asking how the tournament went when he mentioned how tired he was from consecutive preparatory practices the week before

things that show they do pay attention, and they do care

someone who looks out for him

this comes in many forms: bringing him a drink and snack bc you know he’s been up all night binging a new game and is probably dehydrated and hungry, or gently guiding him by the arm when he’s got his nose in his game and would definitely walk into traffic, or taking over in a conversation when they recognize he’s just hit his social quota

again, actions>words

along with this interest in him, trying to playfully get him to smile or get a reaction out of him would be annoying at first, but eventually would get him more and more flustered

sound contradictory to what i said before about him needing to feel not pressured? it is a little bit. he doesn’t get it either

really it’s the fact that this person wants to show the way he already feels

okay like Tendou, i feel like i have to say that if they play games or at least are knowledgeable about them, or even want to learn about them, it’s immediate bonus points

it’s one of his two loves. they don’t even have to be good at games as long as they can engage or listen to his rant about the history of a series or how the game mechanics differ between two different platformers and why one may be considered smoother gameplay, but it’s actually more restrictive--

you get it

someone who just casually checks in. “how are you doing?” then moves on and doesn’t make a big deal, but will listen if he needs to vent

like Iwa, he likes someone who’s straightforward and genuine

and like Tendou, there’s something about them that is unique that he latches onto

needs someone “interesting” that always brings some new experience

like Tsukki, he likes mental stimulation why do i keep using the others as examples lmao

they need to have a sense of humor. may surprise you, but he is bffs with Kuroo, and someone witty is someone who’s interesting

he’s always got a lot on his mind, he’s always thinking

they’d need to be someone he feels comfortable conversing with and sharing his thoughts with, and is a good and responsive listener

some sort of intellectual capability

when he gets to the point where he actually seeks out their company, he starts to realize his feelings

and when he does, he’ll feel more nervous initiating interaction (afraid he’ll say or do something wrong)

they need to be someone who will take the initiative and seek him out too, and that would only intensify his crush

*****

this turned into more of a character analysis,, oops?

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mintchanniemint · 4 years

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pairing: [still friends] bassist!chan x (fem)reader wordcount: ~3.3k taglist: @100797-bc - @chansrms

[08:45 a.m]

"...So, since everyone seems ready and excited for this new project that involves more departments of our university, I think it's time to start! Be careful, everyone! And make sure to share all your thoughts with each other!"

A wave of "yes, Prof." slowly lit up in the huge auditorium as every student sounded both tired and bored. You had to admit you strangely didn't really hate this project, you probably had to do worse things, like that time you ended up doing a cooking project and nearly poisoned that girl from the History Department. Whenever you reminded yourself of that little incident, you always made sure not to see her, not even accidentally in the college restrooms. But this time, the project not only sounded a bit safer, but you even ended up in a group with a certain someone. And that was the only reason why that morning you didn't fall asleep while the professor was giving you the guidelines and instructions for your tasks. The project was related to the school systems around the world, and how they differed from each other, analysed under specific views. You were assigned a not-really-exciting topic, which was School Uniforms. Now, you had to admit you felt quite lucky the university you were attending didn't force its students to have a uniform to wear, but just the thought of having to learn how to tie a tie made you fall asleep on the spot.

"Hey."

Your train of thoughts got brutally interrupted by a way too familiar voice as you finally looked around, a bit confused, noticing that the hall was nearly empty. You looked in the direction of the voice that got your attention, to see a way too sleep deprived Bang Chan in front of you. You couldn't help but giggle a bit, he sat down on the seat right in front of yours, crossing his arms on the chair and plopping his chin on them. He looked at you for a couple of seconds, in silence, before slowly closing his eyes.

"You really look like a cat, sometimes." You whispered with a smile, your hand automatically reaching his soft curls, playing with a brown strand of hair with two fingers.

Wait… brown?

"Chan, when did you dye your hair?" The alarm in your voice nearly made you sound a bit too concerned and he quickly looked at you, his eyes half open.

"A couple of kids told me that I had to have a nice hair color for the project-" He then closed his eyes again, his head pushing a bit against your hand, as if asking you to keep playing with his hair.

"They were so serious about it, but my red hair dye is not so cheap to be covered by some brown color so I just used some hair color spray."

You looked at him, biting your lip trying your best not to burst out laughing.

"Yes, that's such a Chan thing for you to do…" You mumbled to yourself, your voice clearly highlighting a smile on your lips. He hummed in response, probably asking you what you meant by that. You shook your head and stood up, getting your bag from the seat next to yours.

"C'mon, bass boy, we need to go and try the uniforms!" You said, trying to sound as exciting as possible, hoping to somehow give some life to that sleepyhead in front of you.

"There's a reason why I always skip morning lectures." He mumbled, yawning and keeping his back on his shoulder. He followed you as you walked through the hallways of your department, not too familiar to him.

"They said this is the class, right?"

"Were you listening while that professor was assigning the classrooms to each group?"

"Nah… not really."

"Me neither."

The both of you just looked at each other for a couple of seconds, as if mentally screaming and asking what to do if you got the wrong class. Luckily enough, though, the door before you suddenly opened, revealing a black haired guy wearing round glasses, and a taller girl right behind him. They both looked at you, then the girl checked a pile of papers in her hands, nodding, and suddenly they smiled at you.

"Welcome! We were waiting for you!" The guy exclaimed, taking a couple of steps back and letting you and Chan enter the classroom. It was empty, some desks were occupied by big boxes with black, confusing scribblings scribblings on them.

"Those are the uniforms we are going to try, hopefully the sizes are gonna be fine! We thank you for submitting your essays and researching about school uniforms from various countries. Even though yours…" The guy mumbled, checking some of the papers the girl gave him, as he looked at Chan. "... was submitted two minutes before the deadline. But we appreciate the effort! You also followed our little advice about your hair! " The girl interrupted her friend, trying not to make him say anything way too harsh. She smiled at Chan, getting his usual cold stare in response, which left her a bit confused.

"Uh… yeah he really cares about this stuff, guys! Chan is just… not really good at expressing himself with words, yeah!" You swiftly entered the little conversation too, probably making it worse since as a consequence you only got an embarrassing silence and four pairs of eyes looking at you.

"Can we please see the uniforms now?" You quickly whispered, nearly tripping over your own words as you felt your own mind screaming for five whole seconds.

"Sure! Some students have already tried the uniforms they mentioned in their own essays and they're getting ready to take photos! We're really ambitious for this project!"

"And we're sure that the magazine of this project will turn out amazing with our photos! Seungmin is gonna make you shine like models."

They looked like those cartoon characters that completed each other's sentences, you couldn't help but find them a bit funny, though. Seeing them being so enthusiastic about this project made you feel a bit guilty too, since ten minutes earlier you were literally planning an escape with your fake-brown haired friend in case you didn’t get the right classroom.

You smiled at the two students in front of you and grabbed Chan by his arm, guiding him to a box on which you recognized your names were scribbled on with a black marker. Other students, definitely more responsible than you and Chan fused together, told you about the stuff you had to do. It was quite simple: go to the improvised changing rooms, wear the uniform, take pictures. Write about your general thoughts and impressions of the project at the end of the day. You just hoped Chan grasped all that, as he looked like he probably would have fallen asleep in the changing room. It didn't matter that much, you would have definitely helped him anyway.

You two were given three uniforms, and since there would have been lunch break in a couple of hours, the students of your group were asked to wear one of those uniforms. You didn't really understand why, but thinking about how other students had probably ended up in groups where they were supposed to cook, you felt quite lucky and didn't want to complain at all.

Chan was given his first uniform to try, and he walked to the changing rooms to try it on quickly. The photographer was taking quite some time taking those photos, and you didn't have to try the uniforms yet, since many other students were already waiting in line for the shoot. You just stood there, leaning on the wall, waiting for the moment Chan would have finally left that improvised changing room. Suddenly, the black curtain moved and a not so amused Chan made his amazing appearance: he was wearing black trousers and a white shirt, a tie on his right hand. He looked at you as he walked closer to you, and left the green and red tie on your hand.

"I don't know how to do this." He mumbled, as he finished buttoning his shirt up. You looked at the piece of cloth in your hands and took a deep breath.

"I don't know either but… Let's try, I guess?" You mumbled in response as you brought the tie around his neck, trying your best to seem like you knew what you were doing. Because of the little task you were asked to do, you had to get closer to Chan. You could feel his calm, relaxed breath gently hitting your face as your eyes were completely focused on that tie. Suddenly you felt his hand resting on your waist when you finally figured out how to make that tie look presentable for the shoot. You felt quite proud of the result and, not minding too much about Chan's hand on your waist, you dragged him to the photoshoot corner.

A cherry-red haired guy was there, a black bag right next to him, by his feet, as he was giving instructions about posing to a girl right in front of him. He then got his camera and, making sure everything was perfect, a loud "click" was heard.

"Let's take a couple more. So we can, eventually, choose the best one!" He smiled, getting a thumbs up by the girl who was temporarily his model. Seungmin, hoping you got his name right, seemed quite professional, and it took you literally seconds to guess he was from the Arts Department. You felt quite out of place for a good minute, everyone around you seemed like they were genuinely interested in that project and then there was you, who didn't stay home just because that grumpy, quiet cat-owner sent that essay last minute and automatically made you want to go just to spend the day with him.

Wow, that's embarrassing… And quite lame.

You shook your head, trying to let that thought drift off, when you suddenly heard someone call your name, announcing that you were able to try some of the uniforms you were assigned. You had to leave Chan's side, and you had to admit it felt way warmer when you had his arm around your waist.

"It's my turn! Gotta go."

"Make sure to button up the shirt properly."

"Oh shut up." You stuck your tongue out at him and you walked away, not before getting a gentle, quick squeeze on your waist by Chan, though.

Okay, let's be honest. Both of us are embarrassing and lame…

You mentally rolled your eyes at your own thoughts and quickly walked across the room to get your uniform, and headed towards the changing room. You didn't have any problems trying the clothes on, the trousers felt quite comfortable and you also liked how pretty the colors were. You looked at your reflection on the mirror, which was probably lent by the drama club, and quietly wondered which country's school that was supposed to be. You didn't really remember, even though you were literally the one who wrote about it in that essay, but you just shrugged it off and left the changing room, your eyes quickly landing on the little photoshoot corner.

It was Chan's turn, and that girl wasn't lying at all when she said that Seungmin was going to make everyone feel like a model. You nearly got caught staring at him and quickly walked closer to the queue of people standing, waiting for their turn to take photos. Seungmin seemed not to let your friend go, he probably found a good subject to photograph. He took photos of him in at least four different poses when he usually asks for two poses per student.

Chan left the spot with a small nod and walked away, leaving a satisfied Seungmin checking all the photos taken with his camera. Your friend quickly found you and walked closer to you, his eyes scanning the uniform you were wearing.

"Looks nice." He mumbled, one hand in the pocket of his trousers, the other one reaching a strand of hair that escaped from your ponytail.

"Oh well, thank you school president." You teased him with a smirk, before distractedly playing with his tie.

As it was finally your turn to take the photos, you couldn't help but feel Chan's gaze constantly on you. Seungmin made you feel at ease in a matter of seconds and you had to admit the shots were really pretty. He clearly was working so hard to make everyone shine in those uniforms. You thanked him with a smile and, followed by Chan, walked closer to those boxes containing other school uniforms. You had to try three other pieces before the big clock on the wall finally signed that it was lunch break. You were relieved half of the day had finally passed, but then you remembered you had to stay in that uniform you had just put on for the following two hours.

"The last time I wore a uniform for school was ages ago!"

"Wouldn't it be ten minutes ago?"

"Chan, c’mon." You sighed, exasperated, as you got your lunchbox from your bag and walked to the cafeteria with your friend. You noticed the uniform he was wearing only when the two of you sat down at a table and looked at each other for a fraction of seconds.

He was wearing a black turtleneck and a white shirt on it, his trousers were dark and looked more comfortable than the ones he had to wear for the second shoot.

"What."

Uh oh… caught staring…

"Oh, nothing! It's just… well, at least you don't have to wear a tie, hm?" You cleared your throat and looked around, your mind in complete alarm mode.

What an idiot.

Chan, in response, nodded and opened his lunchbox. Meaning that his whole interest was now on the food in front of him. You sighed in relief, you both loved and hated how naive that guy was. Definitely a double-edged sword. You shook your head at those thoughts and quickly opened your lunchbox, enjoying your meal and Chan's company for lunch.

"You know…" You said, between some bites. "Don't we look like high school students?" Your lips quickly curved into a silly smirk.

Chan looked at you, his eyebrows furrowed. "Isn't that part of the project-"

"No, Chan, I mean! Doesn't… this! Make you wonder what high school life would have been like if we were, you know, classmates-”

"Not really."

"Absolutely no fun." You pouted, your little rainbow-colored dream was completely destroyed before it could have even reached its completion because of Chan's straightforwardness.

The two of you chatted a bit after finishing your lunch and, since you had quite some time before returning to your team's classroom, you decided to go for a walk in the huge hallways of the university. You didn't feel as uncomfortable as you thought you would a few hours earlier; the uniform you were wearing was quite nice and warm too, and you were glad Chan had brought a scarf that morning, since you forgot yours at home because you were in a hurry. Even though he probably didn't even agree on that, you were wearing his scarf as you were walking down the hallways. Many students greeted you and way too many people were literally staring at Chan. You raised your eyebrows at the guy next to you, wondering exactly what they were so fascinated about.

Just wait till he opens your mouth, everyone.

You lightly giggled at your own thought, finding your mind funnier than usual when suddenly you walked past a group of students that stopped you. Specifically, that stopped Chan. You were a few steps back, looking at them quietly as some of them, definitely freshmen, gave Chan a few little pieces of paper. As the group of younger students walked away, Chan looked at you, his eyes literally filled with question marks.

"Wow Chan, you show up for morning lectures once and the whole Literature department falls for you." You commented with a dry laugh as you walked closer to him, checking the little notes in his hand. He shrugged and put them in the pocket of his trousers, leaving you speechless for a second.

" Wait, you're not throwing them away?"

"No, what if they actually need some tutoring."

"Chan are you serious-"

He looked at you for a second, his fake brown hair slightly touching his eyes. You sighed and shook your head, looking away for a second, when suddenly a huge thought hit you like a train.

What was that? You really couldn't tell, but something was burning. You felt annoyed. By what? You really didn't know how to explain it. What was that for? You had to calm down, those were just random phone numbers on a piece of paper, it wasn’t like that guy was going to contact them anyway. … right?

Breathe. Take a deep breath, you really need it before you do something dumb. Don't be dumb, don't be dumb, he's just a friend after all, he can do whatever he wants. Do not do anything dumb.

"Are you okay?" His usual, dull voice interrupted your thoughts for a second, making you notice you were actually holding quite tight on the scarf that was gently keeping you warm.

Your eyes finally met him, and you stayed silent. Complete silence. For at least five seconds. Your mind was running, gosh it was sprinting. From one thought to the other. And that weird burning was growing, and growing, and growing inside you. Your eyes were analyzing every single detail of his face. His brown eyes, that weird dye that was covering his usual beautiful dark red hair, his plump, full lips, that black turtleneck. And again, his eyes, his lips, his hair, his turtleneck, the ears that were usually adorned with beautiful earrings that were now completely bare.

And again, his eyes, lips, the turtleneck, his hair…

When suddenly, your hands moved before your mind could even realize that. You grabbed him by his arm. That was completely normal, you literally had always done that. But that time, that time you were dragging him to a small, quiet corner, far from those annoying and busy hallways. You were now in a small hallway, near two broken vending machines and an emergency exit.

"What is wrong with you?" He mumbled, his voice clearly expressing his confusion. You said nothing, you just pinned him against the wall, his hands quickly finding their way on your waist, and you looked at him straight in the eyes.

Your hand reached the collar of his black turtleneck, pulling it down with not much delicacy and your lips softly met his warm, sweet skin. He squeezed your waist as you angrily, but lightly, bit his neck, making sure to leave at least a small mark. You took a step back and looked at it for a second before fixing quickly both his turtleneck and shirt. Your eyes slowly met his, and moved to look at his cheeks, who were tinted in a light, pastel red color.

"Please don't contact any of them." You whispered, unexpectedly out of breath due to the adrenaline rush. You didn't let him say nor do anything, you just took a few more steps back before walking away in a rush, headed to the classroom.

Now.

…

What the hell did I just do?!

#inkidz #bang chan #chan fluff #bang chan imagine #bang chan soft hours #skz au #skz imagine #skz blurb #skz soft #stray kids blurbs #stray kids imagine #stray kids au #stray kids chan #bassist!chan #skz fluff #chan imagine

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snkpolls · 4 years

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SnK Episode 70 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 76 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

RATE THE EPISODE 74 responses

Although the response to this week’s episode was still overwhelmingly positive, with 95.9% of responses giving the episode 3 or higher, it was a bit lower in comparison to the previous one.

Epic

Very amazing a 💯/10✊

I loved it, as always

Gabi episode? NO BUENO.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING GABI AND FALCO MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 74 responses

Gabi and Falco’s escapades took up the vast majority of the episode, so we wanted to know which one of them was your favorite. An equal amount of respondents (28.4%) seemed to prefer either the moment wherein Gabi came under attack from that perfidious horse or Kaya remembering Sasha and how she saved her life years ago. Closely behind those (25.7%) are the folks preferring the argument between Gabi and Kaya. Another semi-popular option was the scene wherein Kaya showed Gabi and Falco her former village.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS FOCUSING ON OTHER CHARACTERS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 73 responses

We also had a fair bit of scenes focused on characters besides Gabi and Falco. For this question, there was a rather noted diversity in opinions. 24.7% seemed privy to seeing a recurrence of Mikasa’s headache and the flashback to Eren’s killing of the traffickers. 15.1% were most interested in seeing Hange remember Sannes’ warning about the cycle. An equal number of responses (13.7%) were most interested in either seeing the discussion between Magath and the rest of the Warriors on their further actions or seeing Hange confront Floch and the rest of the recruits about their recent actions in regards to Eren. Finally, 11% said that their favorite moment was either seeing the conversation between Mikasa and Louise or the conversation between the warriors and shirtless Reiner. A few folks also indicated their enjoyment of the scene wherein Hange was heckled by the civilians or the conversation between Pixis and Yelena.

WHICH FLASHBACK HAD THE MOST EMOTIONAL IMPACT FOR YOU? 73 responses

We’ve had a few small flashbacks in this episode and it seems like the definitive majority (58.9%) enjoyed the flashback about Kaya getting saved by Sasha. 26% were most privy to seeing Mikasa remember Eren killing the kidnappers many years ago and 13.7% enjoyed seeing Hange remember Sannes’ warning. One person liked catching the sight of Mikasa’s actions in Trost.

RATE JEAN’S OUTFIT 73 responses

Jean decided to try out a new style, courtesy of Coco Chanel, the Paradis Collection. Not too many were impressed, however, with only 34.8% giving Jean’s fit a 4 or a 5. 24.7% gave it a 3, the rest gave it a lower score.

WHO WERE YOU MORE EXCITED ABOUT TO SEE SHIRTLESS? 72 responses

It looks like Eren won this round when it comes to the showdown of AoT’s rare fan service scenes with 75%.

AOT men are immaculate

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE AN EXCUSE TO TALK TO YELENA? 73 responses

Yelena looks to be a rather popular girl, with 53.4% of respondents noting that they would totally appreciate an opportunity to talk to her. 23.3% aren’t sure and 11% really wouldn’t, in contrast. 12.3% simply don’t care.

WHICH NEW DETAIL DID YOU GET MOST EXCITED ABOUT? 72 responses

For this question, we got a rather colorful pie chart. 26.4% of respondents stated that the existence of a flying boat fueled by iceburst stones is the most interesting detail. That was followed by, in order from more interesting to less interesting according to the poll takers, Blouse family’s involvement with Historia’s orphanage, Yelena making contact with Eren beforehand, the girl Sasha saved in Episode 2 of S2 being Kaya’s identity, the confirmation that Louise was the girl Mikasa saved back in Trost and fact that Floch and his co-minded folks leaked information about Eren to the press and the existence of Eren’s “home”.

GABI SPENDS A LOT OF THE EPISODE SPOUTING OUT THE THINGS SHE’S BEEN BRAINWASHED TO BELIEVE, A CONTRAST TO FALCO WHO IS MUCH MORE OPEN-MINDED. THOUGHTS? 72 responses

Gabi shouted out a lot of questionable things in this episode, at various points. We’ve asked how the respondents felt about it. The plurality, 37.5% simply saw it as a rather sad state for her. In contrast, 27.8% were actually annoyed with her for that. 16.7% thought that it might have been, perhaps, a result of her attempting to fool herself. We also received a lot of write-ins.

Gabi's IQ is a bit low or she has been brainwashed harder than others

I think it’s just hard for her to see it any other way because she is so young. She was starting to be shaped like reigner, Annie bertholdt.

I understand why she acts like that. Doesn't make it any less annoying tho

I feel so bad for her. Marleyan propaganda and indoctrination is one hell of a drug

Gabi sucks and she just is a trash character

She's just a kid trying to deal with a lot of trauma and new contradicting information whilst also having a winning attitude. Her negative feelings toward Eldians is familiar and so constant hatred is just a coping mechanism.

It only makes sense for her to act this way. Falco and Colt had to join the warriors unit to redeem their uncle’s crimes as part of the restorationists. Gabi has been praised and fed false propaganda her whole life, so yes she would have a harder time rejecting her race’s past history. Children are easier to manipulate/brainwash than adults.

I think she’s clinging to what she knew because she had based her whole identity and goals in life off of these facts. Admitting that these things might not be true would be like denying who she is?? Y’know

Immovable object (my hatred for Gabi because I find her annoying and she killed Sasha) vs unstoppable force (me recognizing she is a child in a traumatic situation who has been brainwashed and raised to believe she must atone for things she is not actually responsible for)

A bit annoying, but I'm hopeful that she will slowly change her mind. Maybe due to realizing Sasha was actually a good person through Kaya/seeing she's no different from them?

HOW DO YOU THINK GABI’S BELIEFS WOULD HAVE DEVELOPED HAD SHE BEEN THE ONE TO MEET EREN INSTEAD OF FALCO? 73 responses

An interesting what-if comes about when thinking about Gabi possibly meeting Eren instead of Falco all those weeks ago and how that would have impacted her personal beliefs. A slight majority (50.7%) believe it wouldn’t have changed much, if at all as a result of that possible meeting. 20.5% think that Gabi would have taken somewhat of a middle-ground position when taking her current and Falco’s current beliefs into account. 17.8% can’t really say for sure and 8.2% don’t seem to care. Only a few believe that Gabi would have started to feeling differently back then.

GABI SEEMS TO BE GENUINELY SCARED WHEN INITIALLY EATING AT THE BLOUSE’S HOME. ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW BADLY DID YOU FEEL FOR HER? 73 responses

It doesn’t appear that Gabi has garnered that much sympathy for her near breakdown, with 49.3% noting that they really didn’t feel much, if any, sympathy for Gabi. In contrast, 50.6% said that they felt some noted degree of sympathy, mostly on a moderate scale.

It makes me sick to my stomach seeing Sasha's family just treating Gabi so nicely. I know they don't know she's Sasha's killer but I'd really like to see them go horror-flick on her ass and kill her when they learn the truth

THERE SEEMS TO BE A CLASHING OF IDEOLOGIES BETWEEN HANGE AND FLOCH REGARDING WHAT’S BEST FOR THE ISLAND. WHO WOULD YOU SIDE WITH IN THIS SITUATION? 72 responses

Floch states that Eren ensured Paradis a path to survival via the ability to initiate the rumbling, while Hange shows skepticism that the rumbling is even a probable solution to their problems, feeling they should secure their freedom in other ways. 52.8% seem to feel the same way that Hange does, while only 27.8% would take Floch’s side in this differing of views. 12.5% think neither of them are wholly correct and feel there are other options.

Both should co-operate

Fuck ever agreeing with Floch. Who is he to even question their authority. Sit back buddy, relax, have a breather. You only became a main character this season, nothing bads gonna happen if wittle baby ewen is in jail for COMMITING WARCRIMES and forcing his superiors to cater to him. That's lit-rally how the army works.

I want to say I side with floch, but I don’t trust eren.

I don’t know for sure

I think they're both right in their own way.

dont like floch lol

Wish Gabi would've shot Floch instead of Sasha :/

REGARDLESS OF YOUR ANSWER IN THE PREVIOUS QUESTION, DO YOU THINK EREN DESERVED TO BE JAILED? 73 responses

Nearly 55% of respondents feel that Eren absolutely deserved to be jailed for his actions in Marley, regardless of how they answered the previous question. Only 35.6% feel that he was wrongfully locked up.

Jailing him is just tradition at this point

idk

Yeah. You fuck up and you do the time. If you want to make decisions and live 'freely', don't become a soldier. Simple???

Eren did some war crimes, time to sit in the time-out box

He definitely needs to be observed and perhaps questioned, but not jailed. I thought that wasn't really a great move.

I don't know

How many times has Eren been in jail now? He's obviously not gonna be staying there for long

Reprimanded a little bit for not trusting his team, but didn't deserve jail

DO YOU THINK HANGE IS FALLING INTO THE CYCLE THAT SANNES WARNED THEM ABOUT? 71 responses

Hange remembers Sannes’ words about how someone always steps into the role he once played prior to the Uprising Arc. 67.6% feel that Hange, whether intentional or not, is falling into the cycle that Sannes and his comrades perpetuated for years before them. 19.7% feel the opposite, however, and believe that Hange wouldn’t let things get that bad.

I don’t know why I can’t remember who sannes is rn.

yes but i feel like she will realize this and try to change

I can’t say yet

Yes, to a degree but this doesn't mean they've past the point of no return. Everything the previous government did could have started with good intentions similar to Hange now but those intentions eventually morphed and corrupted.

i dunno

Maybe i'm not sure only time will tell

I think that can't be said for sure until we see how she acts/responds to this realization

Maybe

LOUISE SEEMS TO ADMIRE MIKASA TO THE POINT OF OBSESSION, BUT HOW DO YOU THINK MIKASA FEELS ABOUT HER? 73 responses

Half of respondents feel that Mikasa’s demeanor toward Louise stems from her feeling as though she can relate to the girl in some way. The remainder of responses were rather mixed, with 15.1% feeling that Mikasa simply feels sorry for her, and at a tie for 11%, either feel that she finds Louise annoying or is just generally indifferent toward her.

WHAT DO YOU THINK SEEMS TO BE THE TRIGGER FOR MIKASA’S SUDDEN HEADACHES? 73 responses

Mikasa’s headaches, while they don’t get much of a focus, tend to happen infrequently throughout the series. Though, her headache in episode 70 appears to be a bit more traumatic for her than ones we have seen in the past. 27.4% feel that these headaches are likely related to her Ackerman biology, while 20.5% think that it can be explained as simply PTSD. 15.1% think that it’s her “Eren sense,” so to speak. Small handfuls feel it’s something more related to Paths/The Coordinate, or a mixture of her Ackerman and Asian biology. 21.9% still aren’t really sure what to make of these. Will Isayama give us answers?!

the wine has to have something to do with it????

It's those damn ~PATHS~

HOW DID YOU FEEL WHEN THE HORSE BIT GABI? 72 responses

The horse gets the gold start this week for giving Gabi a little bit of karmic justice. 65.3% appeared to enjoy the little misfortune Gabi had to endure thanks to the horse’s shenanigans. 19.4% agree that this was surely the work of devils! And 15.3% felt genuinely bad for Gabi during this moment.

Horse !!!!!!

Wish that horse would have bit Garbage's head off xD

Horse got some revenge for Sasha! Here's hoping someone ot something else will finish her off permanently!

*falco voice* GAAAAAABIIIIII

Thank you Horse-kun!

WE ASKED THIS A FEW WEEKS AGO, BUT WE WILL ASK YOU AGAIN. WILL GABI CHANGE HER VIEWS ABOUT THE PEOPLE ON PARADIS? 73 responses

56.2% of respondents feel confident that Gabi’s views of Paradis will change by the conclusion of her character arc. 12.3% are still adamant that nothing will be able to sway her views. The remainder continue to be uncertain.

I hope gabi changes her views. But she seems pretty set

I don't honestly know if Gabi will change her views, but killing Sasha was enough to make me ALWAYS hate her no matter what kind of development she may get

Will Gabi change? I don't know but I don't care. Nothing will undo her killing Sasha.

DO YOU THINK GABI AND FALCO WILL BE ABLE TO GET HELP FROM NICOLO? 73 responses

Kaya mentions that they will be eating at a Marleyan’s restaurant and believes that said Marleyan (Nicolo) will be able to help Gabi and Falco figure out a way to return home to Marley. Nearly half of the fandom feel that they won’t be successful in getting any help from Nicolo, while only 13.7% think that he will be able to do something for them. 31.5% didn’t want to make a call either way.

REINER IS DETERMINED TO GET TO PARADIS AS SOON AS POSSIBLE TO SAVE GABI AND FALCO. DO YOU THINK THE WARRIORS WILL BE SUCCESSFUL IN RETRIEVING THEM? 72 responses

Over half of the fandom (65.3%) doesn’t have much faith in the Warriors to successfully retrieve Gabi and Falco. 20.8% feel the opposite, however, and think that their urgency is warranted. Will they get to Gabi and Falco in time?!

epic laina

WHICH QUESTION INTRODUCED IN THE EPISODE ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO BEING ANSWERED? 73 responses

With every AoT episode, we get as many questions as we do answers. This episode is not an exception. Majority of the respondents (53.4%) are interested in getting answers for all of them (What did Yelana talk to Eren about, what is up with Mikasa’s headaches, what is Hange going to investigate and why is Shiganshina being evacuated?). Out of the all of those, the Yelena-Eren convo is the most popular one.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Gabi sucks so hard, she should be much more harshly punished for killing Sasha

The scenery was beautiful!! I'm hoping we get some action soon tho

MAPPA created some beautiful imagery this episode, like the scene with Falco and Gabi at the lake so was gorgeous! Also I wanna honk Reiner's tiddies

babies, my babies.

Gabi sucks

Doesn't really stand out, but I much preferred the pacing of this episode to the last two. I better see some damn rumbling next ep, we're getting straight edged rn with that ice plane. I absolutely FUCKED with seeing Louise do the little salute, brought back memories of simpler times.

Gabi is garbage

I loved the episode! Beautiful callbacks to so many previous set-up/storylines. It made me reminisce a bunch. I also hope for a bit of catharsis regarding Sasha's death by the hands of Gabi. Hopefully something will click and Gabi will realize that she may be wrong in her beliefs after realizing the person she killed (Sasha) is savior Kaya had described to her. While I don't hate Gabi, I also wouldn't mind a bit of karma going her way either.

I think this is definitely one of my favorites so far. There's a lot of interesting new pieces of info, and I'm excited to see how this stuff resolves in the end.

I hate Gabi even more

I hate Gabi SO much

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 73 responses

Thank you again to everyone who participated!

#snk poll #snk polls #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #snk #aot #snk s4

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filmreviewsco · 5 years

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The Two Popes Take Dad Jokes to a Holier Level

Spoilers ahead... duh...

I give this film 2 POPES OUT OF 2!

I’m not going to lie, this film did not interest me at first. Watching the preview provided by Netflix, I didn’t necessarily care for the story. After all, I am not a Catholic. I know nothing about the Pope nor have I ever really cared about anything involving the Pope and religious films have always been hit or miss for me. So, how was I ever going to understand a film based upon a true story involving the Pope and a system I barely understand? I decided to watch it anyway. Why not? My goal to watch every film nominated for an Academy Award got the better of me and I decided to just turn it on. If it was bad, at least I could turn it off. That’s the beauty of Netflix, right?

This film had me hooked within the first ten minutes. It did a very good job of setting the tone for the whole film, gripping the audience immediately. The direction of filming an impoverished neighborhood in Buenos Aires while a narration of how this priest had come from nothing and now flourished under the hands of God played on top of the visual was honestly stunning. Though a simple choice, it really caught my attention. Especially when these same citizens would become so important later on.

Despite the opening sequence, I was still on the fence about the movie. You see, religious films can often become too sidetracked with trying to push a certain agenda that the whole plot of the film gets lost. This hesitation over continuing ended the minute our lead protagonist, Cardinal Jorge Bergoglio, began whistling ‘Dancing Queen’ whilst washing his hands. It was a very simple action in a very insignificant scene but it had me giggling nonetheless. This was when I decided that the film may not be so bad after all. Never have I seen a film focusing on religious leaders and religion itself have an abundance of humor. It was nice. Incredibly nice. As someone who grew up in a church where our leaders did have a sense of humor and were allowed to be a little more flawed, I appreciated that this film wished to showcase the humanity of these people who are treated more like deities than the complex people that they were.

To begin, the cinematography was fantastic. The way the film was shot in a documentary style and how they incorporated real news footage added a whole new element to this picture. I know mock-umentary’s have been around for awhile now but I have never seen one so perfectly blend the real with the fiction. Though some might feel that a documentary adds a separation between the audience and the characters, I truly felt like this style allowed us to be more in tune with the characters with less of a bias. Not saying the film is completely unbiased, it simply felt as if it was looking at everything with a more open mind.

This film not only tackled the intricacies of a documentary but also had elements of classic noir films. When the audience is given a look back on Cardinal Bergoglio’s past, the cinematography changes. The black and white memory was a rather beautiful touch. For me, personally, I enjoyed that there was such a contrast from his memory to his current reality. In a lot of ways, it reminded me of how my memories form in my own mind. Much like an old film, they are devoid of any real color but the light... oh the light, I remember. My favorite moment of this memory is when Cardinal Bergoglio, only Jorge at that time, is giving confession. This is the moment that he decides God has sent him a sign to become a priest and dedicate his life to the church. To emphasize this moment, the director and designers focused on lighting the lower half of the priests face and the eyes of Jorge as if pointing out that Jorge is finally ‘seeing’ his sign from God which is actually just a conversation with the priest. Honestly, I could not even put into words what this scene looks like as no thesaurus or dictionary could compete with the visual beauty of this moment. So, just go watch it for yourself.

As for the writing, it was wonderful. For someone like me, who does not know much about the Pope or what his duties entail, there was not one moment where I was confused about what was happening. These writers did a very excellent job of what my grade school teachers hounded into my mind which was ‘show, don’t tell.’ They very simply exhibited what a Pope does in a day and the sort of responsibilities he has without having to detail from the Pope’s own mouth “this is all I do, blah, blah, blah.” It seems like such a simple task and yet you would be surprised at how hard it is to show certain things. For that, I commend the writers. Not only do I commend them for allowing someone like me to understand the characters and the Pope’s life but I also commend them for allowing humor to shine through this film. Though I know that Pope Frances - Cardinal Bergoglio - is naturally a more hearty and humorous guy, it was nice that they didn’t just go with dramatic text the whole of the film. It would have been incredibly easy to focus solely on the seriousness of these leaders but instead they chose to really keep it honest.

The acting was brilliant. So brilliant, in fact, that for the first twenty minutes of the film I didn’t realize that this WASN’T a documentary. Yes, folks. I genuinely thought they filmed the Pope’s. There was something stunning about both performances. I always appreciate a character that I can dislike in the beginning and yet, by the end of the film, has somehow captured my heart. This is how Pope Benedict was for me. I despised this character in the beginning (reminder, I do not know much of anything about the real Pope Benedict) but, by the end of the film, I found myself caring greatly for him. Do I agree with his nature? Not at all. If you hadn’t noticed, I am nowhere near a conservative. That being said, I did find myself caring for this man and admiring the fact that he would step down because he knows the church is going in the wrong direction. I believe this is all due to the actor and the writing. He managed to make an unlikable being someone I could care for by the end of the story.

Overall, I could talk about this movie for hours and hours. I really thought it was well done and there is so obviously a reason that it is nominated for so many awards. It truly deserves the attention it is getting. And, if you have not seen the film yet and own a Netflix account, I suggest you watch this movie as well. It was a very interesting experience and it’s become one of my new favorite films.

#the two popes #the two popes review #movie review #review

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unklarity · 5 years

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Critical Role: Beau

“Click “keep reading” for more photos and a description of my Beau magic box! :)

Over the course of CR2, I was totally blindsided by how much I grew to love Beau, so I was both excited and nervous to make a box for her. I actually made the whole box on paper first (which I have never done before). I think that on some level, I was procrastinating because if I never started, I couldn’t screw it up. After having numerous Beau conversations with some amazing people (special thank you to @alemongrenade, who helped me to turn my Beau feelings into real words), I was able to pin down some themes for her, but it took a while to flesh them out and really get to a point where I was comfortable with them. I ended up focusing on the difference between Beau’s perception of herself and how others perceive her, the way that perception influences her actions, and how that perception was developed.

I have a bad habit where I always feel the need to one-up myself, especially since I’m always learning new techniques and ways to do things, so I tend to want to incorporate all the things I learn into everything. With Beau, though, I wanted to keep it simple. “I’m a simple girl, simple needs,” to quote her introduction. I think Beau is very simple, on the outside, and I wanted the physical box to reflect that veneer of simplicity. Everyone always underestimates her, thinks there isn’t much more to her than a girl who has a problem with authority. So the box is plain, only decorated on the outside with the Cobalt Soul symbol, and yet the contents are varied and complex. (I love a good extended metaphor haha)

One of the reasons I struggled with Beau was her lack of concrete imagery at the beginning of the campaign. While I appreciated her simplicity from a fan standpoint, it was tough to come up with motifs to fit the box. I really wanted to reference her frustration with not being able to see in the dark and how much of a game-changer her Goggles of Night were. My first thought was a glow-in-the-dark message since I was having a hard time finding something more concrete, and even though I eventually did find a perfect pair of miniature silver goggles, I still wanted to include a glow-in-the-dark element, which ended up meshing perfectly with her jade All-Seeing Eye tattoo.

I painted the tattoo in the inside lid and added a clear, matte glow-in-the-dark paint over the top. You can see in the photo below how it looks in the light and in the dark! It’s one of my favorite parts of the box :)

Stones:

I wanted to stick to the Cobalt Soul color scheme of blues and greys as much as possible, so I wanted to use as many blue stones as I could. For a focus stone, I picked a gorgeous electric blue apatite tower. Apatite clears away guilt, confusion, apathy or negativity and helps expand one’s intellect and desire for knowledge and truth. It also represents positive use of personal power to achieve goals, encouraging you to accept yourself as you really are, and to gain greater self confidence. What I thought was interesting about this stone is that the meaning of the word Apatite relates to the Greek word 'apatao', which means 'to deceive'. Now, that’s probably due to the stone being mistaken for other minerals, but I thought it fit well with Beau not being easy to read, people thinking she’s shifty or lying even when she’s being honest, and her troubles with outwardly showing genuine emotions.

I also included a tiny Jade owl to represent wisdom, balance, perspective, and learning to be comfortable with showing your true self (and because I, too, wish Professor Thaddeus could have been Beau’s awesome owl sidekick).

The rest of the stones in the box are:

Fluorite- focus, intelligence, aids in meditation and helps with finding peace with oneself

Labradorite- transformation, becoming, being more true to who you are, help banishing fears/insecurities while enhancing faith and reliance in oneself;

Aquamarine - courage, freedom, and communication

Honey Calcite- clarity of insight/action, confidence, intellectual power

Rose quartz - forgiving oneself, learning to accept love, alleviating fear and sorrow/resentment

Blue aventurine - moving past trauma/letting go of emotional baggage, endurance, help saying what you mean, inner strength, passion/determination, gaining control of anger and emotion, using it to help you

Hematite- grounding, cooperation (fighting in cooperation with spellcasters), fighting up close and personal (associated with martial artists), help talking your way out of situations

Tourmalated Quartz- hardness/tough exterior, help when feeling trapped/cornered. provides security when there is fear of failure, courage and self-acceptance in the learning process. Help with self sabotaging. Good for discipline and meditation. Help dealing with anger/self loathing/bitterness

Sodalite-help being less critical of oneself and help calming internal conflict

Celestite- clarity, intuition, and openness to things out of your comfort zone (also divine energy as a reference to Caduceus’ Holy Weapon spell)

And that’s it for stones!

Potions:

There are 6 potions, each labeled with a number on the bottom. The first three are in the photo below, in order from left to right:

The first potion is centered around Beau’s perception of herself, and how that’s been influenced by her interactions with others. Inside the bottle are lemon balm and basil for self hatred, peony for shame and anger, yellow carnation for disdain, heather for solitude and only being able to rely on herself/carry burdens herself, marigold for feeling like she has to constantly fight to prove herself worthy of love (“love you have to fight for”), nettle for insecurity and perceived insincerity, pine for low self worth, lotus for rebelling against authority, purple hyacinth for guilt/feeling like she has to apologize for being herself, and yellow hyacinth for comparing yourself to others/not thinking you’re special. Sealed with silver wax and a lotus flower stamp with blue pigment.

The second potion is a direct contrast to the first, dealing with other people’s perception of Beau and how she really is. There’s acorn for wisdom despite youth, sunflower for wisdom/loyalty, nutmeg for intelligence/wit, cedar for resilience and strength, pansy for thoughtfulness, thyme for loyalty, affection, attracting the good opinion of others, and courage in the face of adversity, gladiolus for strength of character, faithfulness, and honor, and dogwood for deep devotion and keeping confidence. Sealed with silver wax and a sunflower stamp with blue pigment.

The third potion represents the Cobalt Soul and what it means to Beau at different points in the campaign. At the beginning, the Soul is just another cage, someone else trying to impose their will on Beau, but as the story goes on, her goals and theirs start to line up. Dairon is the first authority figure we see give Beau a real chance while also managing to earn her respect, making the Cobalt Soul something that Beau can be a part of instead of something she’s trying to run from. In this potion we have tarragon for struggling to regain independence, chamomile for shedding outside influence, anise for using knowledge as power/to protect yourself/to get what you want, gum arabic for meditation, lilac for wisdom/memory/unlocking potential, rosemary for mental alertness/perception, violet for guarding against deception, lily for freedom and no longer feeling trapped, green tourmaline for calming the mind and increasing abilities/confidence, chrysocolla chips for empowerment and adaptability, and jasmine for appreciation, calming, and developing confidence. Sealed with silver wax and a Cobalt Soul stamp with blue pigment.

The next photo shows potions four through six, in order from left to right.:

Potion number four represents Beau’s past and how it affects her life currently. Before meeting the Mighty Nein, Beau grew up with parents who constantly tried to make her into something she wasn’t; her criminal background was a direct result of Beau rebelling against that control, and we see throughout the campaign that her intense distrust of authority figures still follows her wherever she goes. As time goes on, she does do a lot of growing up and letting go, and yet the way she was treated in the past still informs many of her present decisions and actions. In this potion, there’s lavender for ingrained distrust and problems between parent & child, dandelion for overcoming hardship, sage & cypress for grief and loss, amaranth for help recovering from trauma, black salt for being controlled/told what to be, yellow rose for betrayal, yarrow for regaining agency, mint for trying to atone for the past (Specifically, her guilt and criminal background vs. adopting Molly’s philosophy of leaving places better than you find them after his death), and barberry for freeing oneself from the power/control of another. Sealed with silver wax and a rosemary with blue pigment.

The fifth potion centers around Beau’s fears and struggles (fear of people leaving her, of not being good enough, struggle with being friendly/charismatic, being soft, struggle with presentation). There’s rue for regrets and obsessing over past mistakes, poppy for carrying a traumatic period in your life with you and letting it affect your actions, hydrangea for apparent aggression and being “bad at people,” cinquefoil for desire to be eloquent/wise/self confident, snapdragon for feeling like she has to lie because that would be better than being herself, gardenia for difficulty trusting others/letting people in, violet for importance of outward appearance (being in control of your own presentation and aesthetic and how important that is for Beau), amethyst for fear of being abandoned, garnet for help shedding guilt/sharing burdens, redeeming oneself, and struggling with responsibility (taking so many of the M9’s failures as her own personal responsibility). Sealed with silver wax and a fists stamp with blue pigment.

The sixth and final potion deals with the people around Beau and how she grows by learning lessons from others, both members of the Mighty Nein and the people they cross paths with. Just as in all the rest of the M9 boxes I’ve done so far, there are cloves for camaraderie and being improved by friends, one for each member of the group. There’s also red carnation and basil for brother-sister bonds with Caleb and Fjord, skullcap for willful commitment (found family), zinnia for remembering absent friends (Molly), sweet pea for chaos and adventure (in particular the Jester-Nott-Beau “chaos crew”), magnolia for loyalty, rose quartz for learning to accept love, and bluebell for friendship and slowly growing to be comfortable with being more truthful/open with people. Sealed with silver wax and a rosemary stamp with blue pigment.

That’s it for the potions! Next are the rest of the box’s miscellaneous contents:

So before I even got a box for Beau, I knew there had to be ball bearings in it. There are about a hundred, minus any that managed to escape while I took this picture :)

In the tiny blue pouch, there are gold coins for Beau’s role initial role as group treasurer, along with aforementioned ball bearings, a worn out old Circus flyer, and a set of 21 miniature Major Arcana tarot cards - the 22nd card, the Moon, is in my Jester box. Attached to the tie of the pouch are a silver pair of goggles with purple lenses to represent her Goggles of Night.

Also in the box are Beau’s staff, and her super secret book of important monk notes. Tucked into the book’s closure is a tiny hand-stamped coin with one of my favorite serious Beau quotes, “I don’t want us to drive each other away.”

Below are some close ups of the wax seals so you can see them better:

Thanks so much for reading! That’s it for Beau. Below are some close ups of the whole box at different angles, plus the quote I engraved on the bottom: “You are a good friend to have and a terrible enemy to make.”

I really had a great time working on Beau and I hope you love her as much as I do!

You can check my “magic boxes” tag to see the rest of my M9 boxes, or you can see them on my website at unklarity (dot) com!

#magic boxes #critical role #beauregard lionett #mighty nein #critical role art #magic box

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alj4890 · 5 years

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RCD Appreciation Week Day 6 Prompt

(Matt Rodriguez x Addison Sinclaire) with the day's given prompt concerning side characters of Red Carpet Diaries.

(Matt x Addison) A Choices Red Carpet Diaries Fan Fiction one shot

A/N I realized I have never had these two meet in a storyline. I always start them well after they are close. I thought I might spice things up a bit with showing their first encounter and falling for one another.

@rcd-appreciation @hopelessromantic1352 @lilyofchoices @moodyvalentinestories @krsnlove @sunflowergirl05 @cora-nova

Masterlist

Crushing It

"I can do this." Addison repeated over and over, and what the heck, over once more. She carried a few possible outfits toward a trailer sitting back behind a sound stage.

She took a deep breath and tried to prepare herself at meeting for the first time an actual real life movie star. "Be cool." She commanded herself. "No giggling or drooling allowed!"

Just as she went to knock, the door opened.

OMG!!! HE'S BETTER LOOKING IN PERSON! HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!? Her mind screamed at her. "Hi!" Her voice squeaked. "I um..." Say something! Her brain commanded as the part that controled her lips failed to register. You look so stupid right now! Say anything before he figures out what a fangirl you are!

Matt smiled warmly at her. "You must be the new costume designer. Can I help you with those?" He reached over and took some of the hangers from her.

"No, yes, I mean..." She had to tear her eyes from his face. Get it together Sinclaire! "I am the new girl and thank you for helping. I'm Addison."

Oh. My. Look at that smile. And it's directed at me. Brain functions turning to mush. Body slowly melting at his cuteness.

She smiled back at him while walking inside. Matt's trailer was simple in design. The only luxuries were the plush comfortable furniture everywhere, most likely to help recover from strenuous action scenes. Possibly shirtless action scenes.

"Which do you want me to try on first?" Matt asked.

Addison set the clothes down and focused on her new job. She picked some shirt and pant combos then debated on others. Matt's smile grew with her finally becoming less nervous and just a tad bossy.

At one point, she helped him take off a shirt she decided was the wrong color for his golden skin tone. Her fingers brushed against his chiseled abs snapping her back to the fact that she was undressing Matt Rodriguez, the very man she had kept a poster of above her bed in college.

Matt noticed the blush suddenly appear on her cheeks and the slight shaking of her hands. She was reverting back to the one he had first met. He wasn't sure which was cuter on her, the shy nervous miss or the miniature blonde Napoleon.

"Which color do think looks best on me? He asked to help her refocus.

She slowly lifted her eyes up his torso. "Er...mostly warm but there are a few in the cool colors you can wear."

"Isn't every color cool if I wear it?" He teased.

Addison giggled and nearly threw herself out the window when she snorted in a very unattractive way while giggling. Granted it would have only been like a six foot drop, but maybe the bruises would snap her out of this high school crush rapidly developing.

"I think this is the one." She handed him a snug dark blue t-shirt. The soft material outlined every aspect his trainer had made him work on.

"Wow." She mumbled. Her eyes met his and she blushed some more. "Are you allowed to eat carbs?" Why don't you just blurt out every thought? Perhaps throw in a couple of embarrassing stories from childhood next time.

"Allowed? No." His lips curved into a sheepish smile. "But I dream about them every night."

Addison nearly doubled over laughing at his exaggerated longing expression. He mocked being hurt at her making light of his passionate love for breads and pastas.

"When the movie is finished, I promise to take you out for an all you can eat carb night on the town." Her smile glowed with how easy it was becoming to talk to him. His ability to make fun of himself made him so incredibly adorable.

"You know I am going to hold you to that." Matt walked over to a calendar he had on the wall. "Phil promised me that we should be done shooting in another six weeks." He circled the week in red and wrote PDA across it.

"PDA?" Her blue eyes widened.

"Pasta Date with Addison." He told her with a wink. There was a knock on his trailer door for him to come to the set. "Thanks again for taking the time to find me clothes that don't make me look like some run of the mill action star. Most that have handed me outfits in the past did not even try to see what works best. They just threw a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt at me."

Addison smiled proudly. "You're the first person I've gotten to dress since I graduated. I can't have you look like everybody else."

"I'm you're first? But you act like you've done this before!" His smile glowed as he encouraged her on his way out. "See you soon, Addison."

She gathered the discarded clothes and followed him out. The director's assistant complimented him on how he looked for a scene. Matt gave Addison all the credit without realizing she was a few steps behind him. She wanted to drop the clothes and hug him for being so sweet.

"And I thought I loved him before I met him." She said to herself. "

______________

Four years later...

"Matt, will you hurry up! I've got three other people to dress." Addison reached over and quickly began to unbutton the packet of buttons on his pants.

"Sorry. I've never worn period clothing before and am having trouble figuring it out." He mumbled while pulling a shirt over his head.

She shook her head while pulling his pants down.

"Addison!" He ripped the shirt off. His hair was sticking out at odd angles. "Could you wait a minute and let me do that?"

"I've seen you in your underwear before." She muttered. "We've been friends like forever. I promise not to ogle you."

Matt squirmed at her hands helping him undress. This was the only part he hated about working with her. He knew one day his body was going to betray how he felt about her. Removing his pants was something she didn't need to do unless she planned on changing their relationship status.

Addison gathered the clothing and grinned at the blush covering his cheeks. He is such a sweetheart. He is still so modest after all this time. She loved working with him. He made the days so much more fun.

"I'll be back to help you dress for the next scene." She promised, leaving before he had a chance to tell her that wasn't necessary.

He groaned and collapsed face down on the couch in his trailer. Doing a historical romance was more challenging than he anticipated. Thomas was teaching him so much about the depth of subtly in acting. Holly had written a screenplay he found interesting. Addison had created costumes that were already garnering nominations. He loved the fact that he was working with both actors and behind the scenes people that were his true friends.

But Addison was also a little something more. She just didn't know it yet. His crush had grown over the years to love. Needing her assistance more so than usual to dress in these elaborate military outfits was going to end up ruining their friendship. He needed to confess his feelings and be done with it.

Addison walked in on Victoria going through some lines with Holly. She eyed the glittering ice blue silk ballgown and nodded in approval. Everything was where it was supposed to be.

"Need anything?" She asked.

Victoria grimaced. "Will you check on Chadley. He thought a cravat was a type of carrot. His disappointment will ruin the next scene."

Addison choked back a laugh as she backed out of the dressing room. Holly caught up with her a few moments later.

"I see Matt's clothes clutched lovingly in your arms." Holly teased. "Finally got him naked, huh?"

"Holly!" Addison hissed checking to see if anyone overheard her.

"Please. We all know." Holly rolled her eyes. "You started crushing on him when you crossed the California state line."

"I did not." Addison protested. It happened...huh. It was when she came here for college.

"You did too." Holly corrected. "And if I were a lady who bets, I would bet a large amount that you're feelings would not be unwelcomed."

Addison was as red as the jacket she held. "Look, my feelings for Matt are perfectly fine in the friend zone."

"Really?" Holly narrowed her eyes. "So it wouldn't bother you that Victoria ran into Pippa Majors and she plans on stopping by the set later for a visit?"

"Why would that bother me?" Addison asked.

"Because she specifically asked if Matt would be here."

"Oh." Addison's shoulders drooped.

"Good thing you don't mind her coming. I think she is going to ask him to be her plus one to Marcus's wedding." Holly studied her friend closely for a spark of temper. She hoped her prodding would spur her into action.

"I...I gotta check on Chadley." Addison hurried away.

____________

A few hours later...

"Hey Holly. Have you seen Addison?" Matt asked. "She promised to help me dress for the next scene."

"She must still be with Chadley." Holly glanced at the handsome actor taking a sip of water. "I think they make a cute couple."

Matt spit his water out. He coughed, apologized to the poor grip he spit on, and cleared his throat. "What?"

"I think Chadley has a crush on her." Holly continued innocently. "Addison thinks he is a sweetheart. I think they could possibly be together if I encouraged them both."

Matt was adamantly shaking his head. "No. They would not be good together."

"Why not?" Holly ignored the look Thomas gave her as he overheard their conversation. "They are both genuinely kind. Chadley might be lacking in the brains department but he is a very handsome guy. Addison is as sweet as she is cute. I can't think of two people more meant to be together."

Matt paled. He caught a glimpse of Addison squeezing Chadley's hand as she left his trailer. Whatever he said had her smiling and waving goodbye.

Holly followed his gaze and prodded some more. "Can you think of a better match for her?"

"I..." Matt's usual pleasant expression hardened as he walked off without another word spoken.

"Nicely done." Thomas remarked as he passed his notes to her.

Holly grinned. "I thought so too."

______________

Another hour after that...

Matt paced his trailer. Thoughts and possible outcomes flickered through his mind, angering him. "Come in." He barked.

Addison paused in the doorway. "You okay?"

"Yes." He snapped.

Her crystal clear blue eyes reflected the shock and slight hurt she felt over his tone. "I'll just leave these here."

"Addison, wait." Matt rubbed his hands over his face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you." He sat down, motioning for her to join him

She came back in and gently rubbed his back. "What's wrong?"

Matt swallowed nervously. "I'm in love."

NO!!! NOT PIPPA! Her brain screamed. "Oh? That's...that's great."

"No it isn't." Matt muttered. "She doesn't feel the same."

"I bet she does." Addison rolled her eyes. That jerk Pippa is probably playing hard to get.

"She likes Chadley." His eyes focused on her face.

"Who would ever choose Chadley over you?" Addison covered her mouth at her own outburst. "Don't get me wrong he is a sweetie, but seriously...I mean, have you met you? You're literally the best guy ever. You got it all. The body, the heart, the brains...you're the whole package, Matt. If Pippa can't see that, then she is a bigger idiot than I thought."

Matt nearly whooped with relief until she brought up Pippa. "What does Pippa have to do with anything?"

"Aren't you taking her to Marcus's wedding?" Her puzzeled expression caused his own.

"No. I had planned on asking you to go with me, but I didn't want to interrupt the time you could be spending with Chadley." His puzzlement grew as her brow furrowed even more.

"Why would I do that? Don't get me wrong I like him as a friend, but he is better in small doses." Addison slowly smiled. "You were going to ask me to be your date for the wedding?"

Matt's sheepish grin appeared. "Yeah. Would you like to go with me?"

"Yes, I would." She wondered if he realized how close he was to her now.

Matt leaned even nearer. "Would you like to have dinner with me after the shoot?"

She nodded, lowering her eyes to his lips.

They barely brushed her cheek. Matt's arms wrapped around her as he ever so slowly kissed her.

Her touch was just as gentle. Her mind though...well...

"GET SOME GIRL!"

#rcdaw #rcd appreciation week #rcd ma #rcd addison #Matt x Addison

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thevirgomen · 5 years

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What a Virgo man wants to hear – But needs you to discover it

New Post has been published on https://virgomen.net/what-a-virgo-man-wants-to-hear/

What a Virgo man wants to hear – But needs you to discover it

As you probably know by now a Virgo guy can be a complicated creature to understand.

He tends to have strong views on his place in the world and how everything around him fits his life.

How then is a woman to know if a Virgo man likes her?

He knows what he wants to hear from a woman but expects her to know when and how to say it. An infuriating characteristic is that he expects everyone to know what he is thinking which can invariably lead to misunderstandings.

Leading relationship expert James Bauer has discovered a simple technique that can be used by women to bring out the unspoken need in your Virgo crush. To win the heart of a Virgo guy you must listen to the video below.

It is entitled His secret Obsession and you can listen to James in this short video as he explains how his research has uncovered the answer for 100’s of women.

Understanding Virgo man crush signs

Sometimes a relationship with a Virgo man can initially seem like an uphill struggle. Some of the time we don’t know what we really want, other times we feel we know what we want but it is odds with the other person.

This can be really frustrating, but the good news is that overall a relationship with a Virgo guy is worth persevering with. For all his other faults a Virgo man has many good characteristics going for him.

It would be nice to know sometimes exactly what our crush is thinking so as to avoid upsets that seem to arise out of nowhere. If only we could say the thing that our man wants to hear, but we have to hold back for fear of being too keen.

Related article: The secret a woman must know in understanding a Virgo guy

6 Signs that a Virgo man is getting serious about you

He will be careful how he touches you

When a Virgo man really likes a woman he wants to make sure that he doesn’t offend her in any way. He wants to assure her that he has the utmost respect for her so will be slow in making the first move with any physical contact.

A Virgo man will start by paying you little compliments, possibly noting how nice your hair has been styled or how well an outfit you are wearing suits you. He will go out of his way not to do anything that may put you off him like accidentally brushing against you or sitting too close together.

The sign of Virgo is closely related to the symbol of virginity, and a man born under this star sign has characteristics that relate to him giving himself too freely. Once he feels you have given him permission to move forward things will change very quickly.

As soon as he feels comfortable with you he will be dying to show you what an outstanding lover he can be. A sure sign that your Virgo crush likes you is when he will seem shy and even bashful in the early stages of any relationship.

See also: Does a Virgo man play mind games when dating?

He will be aware of everything you do

A Virgo man has a very enquiring mind and picks up on small details that other men miss. If he is into you he will be interested in everything about you, right down to the smallest detail.

He will be fascinated by things you say and how you say them and may ask you to explain or repeat so that he can fully appreciate what you mean.

The Virgo man star sign will love long conversations on a variety of topics and will revel in mental discussions. He is generally very intelligent and wants to be able to rise above just the physical side of any relationship.

He will be exploring your mind to discover your interests in music and literature as well as anything that you have a focus on. This is where you can appeal to his intelligent mind by letting him know that you also have interests or hobbies.

A Virgo guy is one who treasures memories and will want to remember everything about you. He may even be a keen photographer and will want to catch you off guard to store images of your distinctive smile or other unique feature.

A Virgo is a man who needs to know everything about you so that he can be as sure as possible that he is not scorned later on.

See also: How to get a Virgo man turned onto you

He will watch your reaction to romantic gestures

Under this star sign, Virgo men are known to delight in sweet treats. As such when he likes you he will want to share his desires with you. As he gets to know you expect to receive gifts of cupcakes or chocolates rather than flowers.

Gifts that a Virgo man gives are seen more on the practical side, rather than just something that is discarded like flowers when they die. Although chocolates will be eaten and disappear the gift will have more of a bonding impression.

If he shares his dessert with you on a dinner date you can be sure you are going up in his estimation.

As a Virgo man becomes more comfortable around you he may develop a romantic nickname based on one of your striking looks. He may lovingly refer to you as dimples or blue eyes, hi-lighting your more alluring features.

Subtle signs like this mean he is tempting you with his affections and letting you know he is growing to like you more and more.

Related article: How to make a Virgo man fall in love – What you need to know

He will want to phone or text more often

A Virgo man is known to have a very active and intelligent brain and communication with someone he likes is high on his agenda. Once he has decided he likes you he will want to move things on by speaking to you on the phone whenever you are apart.

If he is growing to love you he will want to telephone you to arrange when next to meet or even just to hear the sound of your voice. He will possibly phrase questions to establish if you are missing him and you will probably find him much less shy when talking on the phone.

Telephoning you out of the blue when you are not expecting it will be a sure sign he is into you. It may just be a call when he has a break at work and he gives you an update on how his day is going.

He will also want to know how you are feeling and he will gauge in his own mind if you are pleased he called or if you are irritated.

A Virgo man is generally very conscientious and focused on the future as far as career prospects are concerned. A big bonus to a Virgo guy is the convenience of texting. This form of communication allows him to stay in touch without interfering with his work commitments.

However, it is important to note that a Virgo man will soon lose interest in anyone sending a mountain of silly texts that are diverting him from his job. As far as he is concerned words that carry a specific message relating to a shared experience have real meaning.

See also: How to flirt with a Virgo guy via text

Top of the list for your happiness

You will always know when a Virgo man likes you when he goes out of his way to put your happiness first. Virgo is a sign that is always concerned that his surroundings are comfortable and he makes sure this follows for someone he likes.

Virgo is an earth sign and as such will be focused and attentive to your well- being and happiness.

Seeing the smile on your face is a massive turn on for any Virgo man. Of all the signs of the zodiac, Virgo is one of the most genuine for the male.

A strong sense of duty and commitment drives this sign to strive for the best life can offer. This is something he wants to share with a person who shows the same degree of honesty and reliability.

Once a woman fully understands how a Virgo man thinks and feels about relationship situations she will find him to be an ideal friend and lover. A Virgo man’s mantra is being happy when he knows the woman he loves is happy.

When a Virgo man starts moving problems out of your way you know it is a sure sign that he wants to know more about you for a long-term future.

Related article: Signs a Virgo man cares for you

He will be attentive and helpful

Virgo men are known to be very dedicated to helping others as well as being extremely conscientious and hard working. He does not suffer fools gladly but when he has made up his mind that he likes you, he will always be there for you.

Assisting you to overcome life’s problems is a pre-requisite of his character. If your car breaks down and you need a lift or even if you just need a shoulder to cry on, your Virgo crush is your man.

He is also a very good listener and you can be sure that any advice he gives will have been well thought out beforehand.

When a Virgo man has made up his mind that he likes you it is a boost to his character if you need his help in some way. The star sign of Virgo is connected to service and he will want to be seen as your knight in shining armor.

As time goes on he will be anticipating your needs and you will find as a mind reader does know what you are thinking. As your relationship blossoms, you need to work on compatibility.

This is all about making sure your love stays the course and learning about give and take regarding each other’s needs in the relationship. All too often a good partnership can lead to a breakup by one partner taking the other for granted.

See also: How to sexually please a Virgo man

Conclusion

The Virgo sign of the zodiac is accepted for being dedicated when love is found with the right person. He may initially come across as a mysterious being but once he likes a person he will be committed to doing everything he can to make her happy.

A Virgo man can make a great loving companion for life for any woman who will uncover and explore his traits and characteristics. By clicking this link you can discover the Hidden Obsession that will make him crazy for a woman who knows how to handle it.

Over time I have spoken to many women regarding a relationship with a Virgo man which has led to me creating my website. http://virgomen.net.

There are many articles available concerning different situations. Why not bookmark my site for future reference?

I hope you find true love with your Virgo man.

My joy is in giving

Charlene

#How men fall in love #romantic #text #virgo man best match

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moiraineswife · 6 years

Text

The Expanse - A Clayleb Fic

OKAY SO I ASKED FOR WHUMP PROMPTS AGES AGO and have only done this one bc it got Long bc that is what i Do BUT SOMEONE SENT ME ONE FOR SHAKY HANDS BUT THEN TUMBLR ATE IT and my draft -_- SO I CANNOT TAG YOU OR REPLY TO YOUR ASK BUT I DID THE THING AND I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!!!

Title: The Expanse

Summary: Prompt: “Another character spots their hands shaking, so they hide them.’ Set between episodes 36 and 37. After Caduceus’ near death experiences from drowning, he finds that he can’t sleep, and moves up on deck. He and Caleb have a conversation, and face their fears together. Caleb’s POV.

Teaser: He considered him for a moment. It would be so easy to simply sit up here in his hidden nook, reading, ignoring what was happening. But as he continued to watch, Caduceus moved to the rail of the ship and gripped it, staring down into the ocean. He seemed to be shaking. A year ago Caleb had been alone. As Caduceus had been for some time before they had found him. He was not alone anymore. Nor was Caduceus. And he did not want to be again.Closing the book, Caleb made his decision.

Link: AO3

Caleb’s legs were cramping.

He was perched in the crow’s nest of The Mistake. The ship swayed gently at ease in the in the midst of the endless expanse of ocean while they took a rest. It was oddly soothing. The vast, gaping nothingness was surrounding him like an abyss. Blackness reigned on all sides. All that differentiated the sky from the rest of the looming darkness were the stars, twinkling down at him like the watchful eyes of the heavens. Cold, and remote, and dead.

When he’d been a child, after his grandmother had passed, his mother had taken him outside that night, after a day of endless quiet crying, and pointed up at a particularly bright star he’d never noticed before.

She’d told him it was grandma’s spirit, watching down on him from above. She was always there, mother said, but in the day it was too bright to see her. Only the night’s darkness could reveal her, but she would always be there, and that the night was nothing to fear.

The story had brought him so much comfort as a child. He no longer believed that story. He no longer wanted to. The thought of his family’s spirits staring down upon the waste of flesh and air he had become did not the faintest hint of warmth or comfort to him now.

Taking a breath, he sat down his book and began to work the knots of pain from his leg. As he did so, he caught movement on the deck below.

Curious, he sent one of his little globules of light floating down slightly closer to it. With a soft breath of relief, he realised that it was only Caduceus.

Caleb frowned slightly. It was late, well beyond the point they should all have been asleep. He certainly wished he was. But he accepted that sometimes sleep refused to claim him, and when it didn’t, he knew it was usually wise not to force it. There was a reason for it. And he had learned to listen.

He considered him for a moment. It would be so easy to simply sit up here in his hidden nook, reading, ignoring what was happening. But as he continued to watch, Caduceus moved to the rail of the ship and gripped it, staring down into the ocean. He seemed to be shaking.

A year ago Caleb had been alone. As Caduceus had been for some time before they had found him. He was not alone anymore. Nor was Caduceus. And he did not want to be again.

Closing the book, Caleb made his decision. Stowing it in one of his book holsters, he stood and stretched. Groaning at the sudden aches in his body, he gave himself a little shake, then began to descend from the crow’s nest.

Nott had initially refused to climb up into it. The height had given her a sense of horrible, dizzying vertigo and she had clung to Caleb the entire time. Caleb himself had never been bothered by them. He actually liked the feeling of being on high, watching everything unfolding below him while remaining aloof and unseen himself.

‘No-one ever looks up’ his father had told him when he’d been young. This had led to the unanticipated consequence of Caleb sitting on the roof of their small cottage for long periods of time.

He shook his head, banishing the memories. He didn’t want to think about that. He didn’t deserve to get any sort of pleasure or enjoyment out of the gentler parts of his past. He focused instead of where he was putting his hands and feet to get back down. It would be just like him to fall and break his neck in front of the traumatised Caduceus while he was trying to help him.

Once he had dropped safely down to the deck he padded towards the ship’s bow where Caducus was currently perched, staring out over the dark ocean. He paused, not sure how to interrupt, sure the firbolg knew he was there.

Clay didn’t turn, however, which was unusual in itself. Caleb had never known him to be anything other than entirely polite.

Glancing down, he realised the firbolg’s big, gentle hands were shaking.

Startled, he found himself blurting out, “Mister Clay, are you all right?”

Caduceus still didn’t turn to him, nor did he answer. He was quiet for so long, Caleb nearly gave up and returned to his book nest. Then, just as he was about to leave, Clay said, quietly, “I never imagined it would be so big.”

Caleb followed his gaze out over the seemingly endless ocean. Cautiously, he stepped up beside him, Caduceus didn’t protest, so he settled next to him and gazed out, too.

“The ocean?” he prompted, quietly. Caduceus could be rather deep at times, and it was impossible to know exactly what he was thinking at any given moment.

“Mm,” Clay agreed, nodding his big head slowly.

“I thought the same thing when I saw it for the first time,” he said, softly, feeling a pressure to break the silence for Caduceus’ sake, who he saw was still shaking. “I grew up in a little farming town in the middle of nowhere. We had nothing, nothing like this,” he gestured expansively beyond the ship.

Caduceus nodded slowly again. “There are a few sailors at home,” he said, Caleb had to take a moment to rationalise ‘home’ with ‘graveyard’ and remind himself that, for Caduceus, they were one and the same. “They talked about it, but...”

“But that cannot prepare you for seeing it,” Caleb murmured.

“Nope,” Clay agreed emphatically.

“I read books about it,” Caleb said. “I thought I understood what it would be like, but seeing it in person...”he shook his head.

He remembered his feelings on that day, as he stared out at the endless expanse of shimmering blue that stretched to, and beyond, the horizon. It had looked like possibility, and freedom, and the opportunity to escape everything forever. It had been beautiful and alien all at once, and he had found himself unable to stop staring at it. He still felt the same way looking at it now.

“I never realised how big the world was until I saw it,” Caduceus said, softly, almost taking more to himself than to Caleb.

Caleb felt a little smile tug at the corners of his mouth. Caduceus seemed so wise and deep most of the time, especially compared to their current band of merry fuck-ups, it was easy to forget how sheltered his life had been before.

“Ja,” Caleb said, softly, “There is a lot of it out there. And I imagine it feels even larger for someone like you, who has stayed in only one small part of it your entire life.”

“Yeah,” Caduceus said, nodding again, his eyes growing a little distant. “We had people come to us from all over, but it was only words, the places they had come from. I never realised, I never imagined...” he trailed off, unable to put his thoughts into words.

Caleb patted him slightly awkwardly on the shoulder, but he seemed to appreciate it.

A slight crease formed between his eyes as a sudden thought struck him and he said, “Did you want to see any of it?” he asked. “Before we found your temple and you felt we were a sign to go with, did you ever dream of travelling the world beyond your home?”

“No,” Caduceus said, with that simple, genuine honesty he had.

“I loved my home, my family, my tea,” he added, and Caleb smiled again. “I had no reason to leave.”

“I was desperate to leave my home when I was a boy,” Caleb confessed in a low voice. “It was small, and backwards. The world beyond it seemed infinite, and full of endless possibilities and potential for someone willing to seize it. I was determined to take it, to escape the lowly peasant place I grew up in and become something great. I was so sure there would be so many great things to discover. And there were,” he said.

His voice had now fallen so quiet it could be so easily snatched away by the sea breeze rippling past his coat, but he knew Caduceus’ sharp ears would catch every word.

“But there were a lot of terrible things, too, that I did not anticipate.”

I was one of them he thought darkly.

“There have been a few things so far that have been, ah, a little unkind towards me, I will say,” Caduceus said. “I don’t think I fully anticipated them, either.”

“Ja,” Caleb agreed, thinking of Caduceus’ two near drownings in as many days. “You have had a rough time of it so far,” he said, patting Caduceus once more, still awkwardly, on the shoulder. “Do you ever regret leaving home?” he asked hesitantly. “Coming with us?” he added, curious.

He felt none of them had really taken the time to get to know Caduceus. He would not go so far himself as to get invested. Not after the world had so recently and brutally reminded him why that was never a good idea.

Still, a few gentle questions couldn’t hurt.

Clay mulled this question over for a time, then said, “No. I might have, even though my home is dying and I want to help it. I thought I might have misread the Wildmother’s signs. Or maybe I had just imagined them because I was so desperate for one. I’ll admit I was ready to leave and go home at one point.”

“Why didn’t you?” Caleb asked, genuine interest making him blunter than he would have liked.

Clay didn’t seem bothered.

“Jester had a little talk with me,” he said,” Reminded me why we have faith, and what that means. That helped a lot.”

Caleb smiled again. “She is good at that,” he murmured softly, nodding his head.

“Yup,” Caduceus agreed.

“She is a good person. Strange, in her ways, as we all are, I suppose. But fundamentally she is a good person. Sometimes I wonder what she is doing with the likes of-“ he broke off, abruptly, catching himself.

Caduceus had a way of putting him at ease. Some natural magic of his made it easy to be comfortable around him, even let his guard down a little. The ocean was the same. They both exuded a strange, similar sense of freedom and escape. Their combination was a dangerous one.

Fool, he snapped at himself.

He had to be more careful. Clearing his throat too loudly, he averted his eyes from Clay’s mild gaze and said in an overly casual way, “So, Jester convinced you not to leave, but you still can’t sleep tonight? And you came up here this late instead?”

“Yup,” Caduceus replied, evenly, apparently not bothered by the brusque subject change and obvious shift of focus back onto himself. “For much the same reasons as you, I imagine.” His tone remained light, casual, and friendly, but there was an intensity to him all the same. “Kind of hard to relax and sleep when you’re always afraid.”

Caleb shivered.

“’Specially when the thing that’s making you afraid is sort of everywhere,” he said, blandly, but his eyes locked with Caleb’s as he said it.

Mouth suddenly very dry, Caleb forced himself not to react to the implied double-meaning and said, firmly, keeping the spotlight on Caduceus away from himself. “The ocean?” he prompted, firmly.

“I mean,” he said, with such an easy smile Caleb almost convinced himself he’d imagined the hidden meaning behind the words, “It has tried pretty hard to kill me a couple times now.”

“So it has,” Caleb agreed. He swallowed with difficulty, coughed, then said, “Well, my father always said that the best way to conquer fear was to face it.”

“He sounds like a very wise man,” Caduceus said, solemnly.

“He was,” Caleb replied, very quietly.

“Did you follow his advice?” Clay asked, jerking Caleb sharply back to the present.

In spite of the relative invasiveness of the question, Caleb found himself grateful for it, as it stopped his traitorous mind from wandering along the cliff edge of his sanity, teetering dangerously towards the abyss that always pulled at him.

He scrunched up his mouth without thinking and shook his head in a sharp, jerky fashion, “I would have,” he said, quietly, self-disgust lacing his words, “If I had been stronger.” He bowed his head, shaking it and muttering, “But I was a coward, so...” He shrugged his shoulders uncomfortably, trying to act as though this was of no significance to him.

He didn’t believe it himself. He highly doubted Caduceus would.

The firbolg watched him for a long time in silence, then, without warning, patted him gently on the top of the head.

This was so unexpected, Caleb started in surprise. The ghost of something that might have been a smile almost flitted across his face.

“You regret not doing it,” Clay said, finally, “That means you’ve grown since then. Maybe next time you have the chance, whenever that might be, you’ll be brave enough.” A soft, sweet smile lit up his face and he nodded, looking suddenly certain, “I think you will. Whatever it is, I think the next time you meet it, you will.”

Caleb shook his head bitterly, but didn’t speak.

“But even if you don’t, it doesn’t make you weak, and it doesn’t make you a coward,” Caduceus said, gently.

“I think that it does,” Caleb said, jerkily.

“Nah,” Caduceus said easily, shaking his head. “You’re still here,” he continued, “You didn’t give in to it,” he considered, then nodded, “You don’t give in to it. Don’t think you can be a coward in those circumstances. Now,” he said, patting Caleb on the shoulder again before he could say anything.

With two long strides he stepped off the slightly raised platform at the bow onto the deck, leaving a somewhat stunned Caleb standing where he had been watching him numbly.

Caduceus took a deep breath, then, without a word of warning, began to shed his armour and clothes.

Momentarily stupefied, Caleb just stared at him for a long second. Then, giving himself a shake, he stammered, “What are you doing?”

Caducues, now wearing nothing but his trousers and the loose white shirt he usually wore under his armour, pulling off his socks as he answered, smile gently at Caleb and said, simply, “Conquering.”

His hands, Caleb noted as he stood up and walked to the rail, were shaking again. But he clenched them into tight fists at his side to control them. Then, without another word, he stepped right to the edge, and jumped straight into the ocean below.

Caleb cursed in Zemnian and hurried to the rail himself.

“That is not what I meant, you-“ he hissed.

Staring down at the ring of bubbles marking the place where Caduceus had disappeared.

Silence.

The light sea breeze ran gentle fingers through his hair. The sails creaked softly as the wind stirred them. The ship swayed rhythmically like a cradle. Caduceus did not surface.

Caleb gripped the wooden rail so tightly it hurt. Frumpkin wound around his ankles, peering down, too, and meowing softly, as though in concern.

Still nothing.

Caleb was on the verge of running below to fetch Yasha, certain he would not be able to rescue Clay himself when with a lot of splashing, coughing, and expelling of water, he resurfaced.

Caleb breathed agin, as though he too had just vanished into the depths.

“It’s deep, you know,” Caduceus observed, matter-of-factly.

“I thought you had drowned,” Caleb hissed, realising he was still gripping the rail too tightly and relaxing somewhat.

“Nope,” Caduceus replied.

He was flapping and flailing so much that Caleb asked, suspiciously, “Caduceus, can you swim?”

“Apparently, yeah,” the firbolg replied with another of his easy smiles.

“Apparently?” Caleb repeated, feeling like an angry dragon about to spit fire at an oblivious cow. “You dived into the ocean with apparently?”

“Sure,” Caduceus replied.

Caleb’s eyes bulged with indignation.

“I mean,” Clay added, “I can sort of swim. We had a little pond back home. One of my sisters taught me a couple things.”

“A pond?” Caleb repeated, faintly. Then he snapped back into a more pragmatic mindset, “Come around this way,” he said, pinching the bridge of his nose and walking a few feet to his left, “There is rigging, you can climb back on board before you do drown.”

“I can’t do that,” Caduceus said, frowning slightly, “Not yet, at least.”

“Why not?” Caleb demanded trying, and failing, to keep the impatience out of his voice.

“I’m still afraid,” Caduceus said simply.

“You-“ Caleb began in frustration, “This is not the time, not-“ he broke off, composing himself, then said, bluntly, “You’ve proved your point, this is not necessary.”

Somehow, even while half-drowning, Caduceus managed to give him a stern look, “Not everything that happens is targeted at you, you know,” he said.”

“I never implied that-“ he began, but Caduceus interrupted.

“I’m not doing this to prove a point to you, I’m-“ he broke off, head briefly submerged by a wave, stuffing salt water into his mouth and smothering his words. “I’m doing it,” he ploughed on valiantly, choking a little as he spit up the water, “Because I need to learn and I need to not be afraid of this. ‘Specially since we’ll probably be in it again tomorrow.”

Caleb was quite impressed he’d managed to get any of that out at all in between bouts of coughing and spluttering while half-drowning. Not to mention more than a little humbled.

“But does it have to be done now?” he pressed, reasonably.

“No time like the present,” Caduceus said, “Something my father taught me.”

“No, there are better times,” Caleb insisted, “Times you can see, for example.”

“No,” Caduceus said, firmly, flailing stubbornly, “I could be in her again tomorrow with no time to prepare or practice. Or I could be struck by lightning and never get the chance.” He was ducked beneath another wave and popped up again, adding with a splutter, “Or I could drown tonight.”

Caleb cursed again under his breath in Zemnian. He was learning many things about the firbolg this evening. Prominent was the fact he had his own particular brand of stubbornness that nothing could overcome.

“Give me a moment,” he called irritably over the side, “And try not to drown.”

“Will do,” floated up to him amid splashing.

Still grumbling under his breath, Caleb stripped himself down to shirt and trousers, too, shrugging his coat and book holsters to the deck.

“Frumpkin, guard,” he ordered the cat.

Frumpkin sat himself down ostentatiously on the coat pile and blinked at him.

That would do.

With that, Caleb too jumped into the ocean.

The water was freezing as he plunged into it, and it took all of his self-control not to scream as the ice cold burned at his skin. It had always seemed strange to him. For all the ravishing, devouring power of a flame, it could not burn like ice.

He surfaced and gasped, but forced himself to take deep breaths and not panic or seize up. Caleb cursed again and shook his head like a dog to get the hair out of his eyes.

“Nice of you to join me,” Caduceus said, smiling for some reason, “The water’s lovely.”

“It is not,” Caleb spat, teeth chattering, “It feels like death.”

“Yeah,” Cad agreed, “I just always wanted to say that.

Caleb sighed and moved towards the still flailing firbolg. “Come here,” he said, floating close enough to touch him. “Stop flapping, you are not a bird,” he instructed, “Besides, all that flailing about will only tire you, which means you will only drown faster.”

“You’re good at this,” Caduceus said, so mildly Caleb almost missed the sarcasm. Almost.

Huffing, Caleb chose to ignore the jibe, noticing that, in spite of his words, Caduceus wasn’t flapping about nearly as much as before, though he was now beginning to sink, and seemed distinctly dissatisfied by it.

Every time his head dipped beneath the waves he desperately flapped his arms as though hoping to take flight and escape the sea altogether.

“Calm down,” Caleb said, trying to make his voice low and soothing. “And lie back, flat, as though you were on a bed,” he said, echoing advice that had been given to him a long time ago.

Caduceus glanced at him, not entirely with suspicion, more a deep uncertainty in his eyes.

“Trust me,” Caleb coaxed, “You are safe, I will not let anything happen to you.”

It had been so long since he’d said those words and meant them. He hadn’t been safe for anyone to be around in what felt like several lifetimes. In truth, he still wasn’t, not entirely. But in the moment, he meant them. Caduceus seemed to know that and, nodding he did as he was told, though he still looked distinctly uncomfortable about it.

Caleb bobbed closer and slid a hand under him, but it was far more a psychological support for Clay than a physical one, the ocean was doing most of the work for him.

“There,” Caleb said quietly, feeling Clay relax a little, realising that he was all right. “You will float naturally in this position, especially in the ocean, due to the salt,” he explained in a low, measured voice. “If you are in difficulty in the water, stay calm, and allow yourself to float.”

“Huh,” Caduceus said. Caleb carefully removed his hand and the big firbolg flailed in sudden fright for a moment before settling and continuing to float. “Well that’s neat,” he muttered absently, and Caleb smiled again.

“Your body will follow your head in water,” he said, gently tilting Caduceus’ head up towards the star-spattered sky, “Look up towards the sun and you should be okay.”

“Thanks, Caleb,” Caduceus rumbled, sounding much calmer and happier already.

“You are welcome.”

“You know, this is actually kinda nice,” Clay said, his eyes closed now, his arms outstretched as though he really was flying.

“Ja, it is,” Caleb agreed flipping onto his back and mirroring Clay.

He gripped his wrist with one hand and the ship’s rigging with the other to stop them becoming separated and drifting away into the depths of the ocean. But apart from his tethers, he simply let himself be.

“It feels like...Like freedom,” he breathed softly, not sure why he was telling Caduceus, but going on anyway, “If I close my ees like this, it feels as though I am no longer here, as though the world no longer exists and I am alone in an endless soft sky where there is no pain. There is only me. And oblivion.”

“Yeah,” Caduceus murmured, and Caleb felt him shiver slightly. “I don’t know if I’d want to live in a world with just me and...Nothing,” Clay said, thoughtfully.

“It has its merits,” Caleb said, bitterly, without thinking.

“Well, sure,” Caduceus said, “But I would miss some things. My home. My work. My family. My tea. I think I might even miss all of you, too, and everything that’s happened. Some of it was pretty terrible, sure, but a lot of it was pretty great.”

Caleb relaxed as Caduceus lapsed into silence. He had been tensed, waiting for him to push him on what he’d just said, but to his relief, he didn’t say anything more, and allowed the silence to stretch into a comfortable moment of peace between them.

After a long time of drifting together in the darkness, however, Clay said, “Who taught you all this? Fjord?”

Caleb huffed a soft laugh at that. “No, he said, “A good guess, but no, it was not Fjord. It was my mother, actually.” In spite of himself, he smiled, still able to hear her cool, measured voice instructing him. “She grew up in a coastal shipping town, and she insisted that I know how to swim properly. She said it may come in useful for me some day.” His mouth twisted into a slight smile at the thought. “I doubt she had all this in mind when she was teaching me.”

“She was right, though,” Caduceus observed, lightly.

“She was,” Caleb murmured quietly. “About so many things.”

He wished he could tell her that.

Caduceus once again, to his relief, allowed silence to blossom between them. It went unbroken so long that something like peace settled over Caleb like a warm blanket on a cold, winter night. He felt he could almost have drifted into sleep at last.

He no longer felt the frigid sting of the ocean. He felt calm, and quiet, and good.

Then he felt Caduceus jostling him.

“Come on,” he said in a low voice.

Caleb made an irritable noise halfway between a groan and a growl.

“We need to get out and dry off, “Clay coaxed, more insistently.

Caleb di not want to open his eyes. He did not want the world and all its horrors to be real once more. He wanted to linger in this sweet, dreamlike oblivion just a little longer.

“Caleb,” Caduceus said, sounding urgent now, “The water’s too cold, come on, we need to heat you up.”

Reluctantly, Caleb let his eyes flutter open. The world and all his pain flooded back. He reminded himself that he deserved it.

“Okay,” he mumbled, a little thickly.

He felt heavy, and sluggish, and Caduceus had to help him as they made their way back to the ship and climbed back on board. Now that he was out of the water he realised just how cold he was, shivering violently and uncontrollably as he spilled onto the deck in a heap.

Frumpkin trotted over, meowing and nuzzling him in concern.

“Here,” cad said, gently draping Caleb’s dry coat around him and picking up Caleb’s books from the deck. “It’s okay, I’ll look after him,” he told Frumpkin reassuringly. Then, to Caleb, he said softly, “Come on,” he said, leading him firmly below decks and into his cabin.

A fragrant aroma filled it from all the different teas and spices he had, but it was not unpleasant. Caduceus steered him towards the bed and nudged him down onto it, ignoring his vague, slightly slurred protests about soaking his blankets.

Then he leaned over him and cast a spell on the metal bed frame. At once, it glowed red hot. Caleb sighed and leaned into the warmth like a plant stretching towards the sun’s light.

“Careful, not too close,” Caduceus said, pausing in what he was doing to tug Caleb gently away from the metal.

A moment later, or so it seemed to him, Caleb had a steaming cup of tea in his hands. “There we go,” Caduceus said soothingly, wrapping another blanket around Caleb’s shoulders.

The fussing felt unnecessary, and he wanted to say so, but was feeling very lethargic and sleepy all of a sudden, and couldn’t summon the energy to do so.

“Sorry about that,” Clay said, sitting down next to Caleb with a mug of tea of his own. “Forgot you couldn’t last in the cold quite so well. No fur.” Caleb nodded vaguely in agreement, though this wasn’t making much sense to him at the moment. “You should be fine now, though,” he reassured him, patting Caleb gently on the shoulder.

Frumpkin jumped lightly onto the bed, purring loudly, and nuzzled closer to Caleb. Clay ran a big, gentle hand along his back and his purring grew louder.

Caleb nodded vaguely again, absently patting Frumpkin on the top of the head.

Some distant part of his brain was screaming at him to be more wary, to keep his wits about him. But it was very difficult to feel that way around Caduceus. At last, when he felt able to speak again he said, “You are a very good person, Mister Clay.”

The firbolg smiled gently and said, “Thank you. So are you, Mister Caleb.”

Caleb shook his head vigorously, “no,” he protested,” I am a piece of shit.”

“Well,” Clay said, apparently considering this, “Shit is technically pretty useful.” Caleb blinked at him, wondering if he was starting to hallucinate. “Great fertiliser,” he added, matter-of-factly.

Caleb stared at him for a long moment. Then he started to laugh, only a little hysterical. He only stepped when he ached too much to draw in the breath required to continue.

“I think I am going to like you, Mister Clay,” he said, finally.

“You don’t already?” Caduceus said with a half smile. Caleb replied with a crooked smile but said nothing.

“I think,” he said, hoarsely, feeling suddenly lightheaded and heavy all at once, “I am going to sleep now.”

He registered, dimly, that he was still in Caduceus’ cabin in Caduceus’ bed, and should move to his own. But his body felt as though his bones had turned to lead, and he was slumping sideways onto the pillows.

“That’s fine,” Caduceus said, a smile in his voice.

That was the last thing Caleb heard before sinking, finally, into his temporary oblivion.

#critical role #clayleb #caleb widogast #caduceus clay #caduceus x caleb #text post tag #clayleb fic #my fic #taliesin said on talks that caduceus would face his fear of the ocean after nearly drowning #and this is my shippy clayleb take on how that happened #long post #mine

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fishy12233 · 6 years

Text

Chronicles of Sturgia

Prologue Part 1: “The Garbled Gossip”

In order for a story to make sense, the reader must know who the main characters are. After all, the main characters are the ones who drive the story. Imagine a middle school cafeteria, bustling with chatter, like a theater before the show. The cafeteria is bright and cheery with its checkered floor and artistic walls. Hundreds of children are chattering at once, some talking about the newest member in a famous band; others are talking about mysterious rumors of aliens, but everyone knows rumors like that are only real in comic books and movies. The chatter continues, an endless garble of noise. Anyone in the cafeteria can see a variety of different students. Six girls walking by while wearing coordinated outfits, a typical guy surrounded by his strange friends, a girl who chooses to doodle on her tablet by herself. However, none of them are our main characters.

As lunch begins, a girl sits down at an empty table with her lunch. Her name is Maddie, and she is the first of our six main characters. She wears a school uniform in a school that doesn’t require school uniforms and has a poppy in her hair. Her eyes are dark, mysterious, and a little sleepy, though her left eye is partially covered by her one-sided bangs. Maddie prefers to spend her time reading spooky novels or playing spooky video games. Her lunch is chopped beef with a slice of devil’s food cake on the side. Maddie isn’t the one who talks very much at her table, but when discussing her interests, she takes full control of the conversation. During an everyday conversation, Maddie is the type of person who tends to listen and observe. This is great for Maddie since she always knows exactly what type of gifts to give her friends on their birthdays.

The chatter continues. Sometimes, when you listen closely, you can listen in on gossip. This can tell someone a lot about what others think of them. Gossip isn’t always the best form of entertainment. But passing students continue to eavesdrop nonetheless.

“Did you see Maddie? She’s so elegant and graceful!”

“She’s like everyone’s big sister. They shouldn’t need to be so dependant on her! She acts like some concerned mom sometimes.”

“But she’s a total goth too! Have you seen her clothes? She looks like she came right out of boarding school! I bet that she’s secretly a witch or something.”

The children continue with their daily routine. The coordinated girls eat healthy salads. A nerdy girl talks to her friends, making sassy remarks with a deadpan voice. Meanwhile, a bratty kid is playing pranks on other people. But none of them are our main characters.

A second girl sits down to eat with Maddie. Her name is Susan. She’s Maddie’s little sister and her total opposite. Susan wears a purple A-line dress with pink flowers on it and keeps a white lily in her hair. She also wears black stockings and flowery shoes. Her eyes are bright, happy, and excited. Susan loves cute things, especially cute things from Japan. She likes doing things like watching cute anime or buying cute plushies. Susan makes her own Japanese bento lunch, complete with octopus sausages and onigiri. But sometimes, Susan decides to go all out and create a cute and elaborate bento lunch with cute characters and a large variety of food. When Susan first saw how cute bento boxes could be, her eyes sparkled with awe. She saved up her allowance so that she could buy her own genuine bento box. Her friends always love her bento box designs and ask her if she could make lunch for them. Susan is extroverted, which in this case means she loves to talk, but is overly dependant on others and sometimes comes off as rude and annoying. Anyone who calls Susan annoying isn’t her friend. During an everyday conversation, Susan is the type of person who gets distracted by her surroundings and always carries the conversation. Susan truly cares about her friends, but always forgets things like their birthdays. Fortunately, she has her sister Maddie to help her remember.

The garbled gossip goes on and on. Everyone wonders what people think of them. They get self-conscious and anxious just thinking about it. Gossip is always behind one's back, but it’s not always well hidden.

“Have you seen Susan? OMG! She’s soooo cute!”

“She may be cute, but she’s annoying. Why can’t she just leave us alone? She should just go back to relying on her sister for everything.”

“She’s also a total weeb! Susan is so into anime and cutesy stuff, it’s sickening! Also also, she totally copied my style!”

While the peanut gallery rambled on, the kids kept eating their lunch. One of the coordinated girls finishes eating and walks over to another table to talk to her other friends. A snarky girl who looks rather similar to Susan gossips and acts as if the leader of her group, even though she’s not. Meanwhile, two sisters and their friend talk about the latest horror movies. But none of them are our main characters.

A third kid sits at the table with the sisters. This time, the kid is a boy named Peter. He wears a propeller hat and a shirt with a smiley face and blue-and-yellow-striped sleeves. Peter also wears a heavy backpack, filled with a ton of schoolwork, his lunch, a bunch of colorful yo-yos, some robot parts from the robotics club, and a huge album of trading cards. His eyes are simple, yet optimistic and determined. Peter likes geeky things like robots and trading cards. He always has the coolest toys. His favorite food is ground beef and rice with ketchup that his mom makes for him. During lunch, he also likes to have a grilled cheese and pizza bagels alongside the beef to share with friends. Peter and his friends love to trade and share their lunches. Peter is outgoing and friendly but sometimes is too distracted with building robots to talk. During an everyday conversation, Peter is cool with listening to others talk, but he can easily carry a conversation if needed. People like talking to him because conversations with him are never boring.

The students continue to talk incessantly. Not everyone who talks with friends is a gossip. Sadly, many girls tend to be labeled as gossips just for being outgoing. The saying, “It takes one to know one,” definitely rings true here.

“Peter’s kind of cute. He looks really cool with his gadgets and toys!”

“Are you kidding me? Peter’s a DWEEB!”

“Geez, shut up! Takes one to know one, dweeb.”

Lunch continues on. The coordinated girl and one of her friends decide to do their friend’s hair in wacky hairstyles. A cooler girl sits with the snarky girl that looks like Susan and chat about other people. The bratty kid gets into an argument with some other students. But none of them are our main characters.

A girl named Lisa, the fourth friend, sits at the lunch table. She wears a large tie-dye shirt and worn bell-bottoms. Lisa wears way too many bracelets and keeps her curly dyed hair up in two large pigtails with scrunchies. Her eyes have more makeup than her friends’, which makes them look more flashy. Lisa likes doing fun things like having parties and playing dolls. She likes playing dress-up and usually likes having sleepovers with Peter. Sometimes, Peter and Lisa would play shovelware games and laugh at them during their sleepovers.

Lisa always likes to sneak candy into her lunch, which usually has fun, bizarre food. She always trades food with Peter. Lisa is chatty but very kind, even to people who don’t like her. During an everyday conversation, Lisa is usually the one to start it. She always talks about the latest trends, but Lisa always gets bored from running out of things that she wants to talk about. Lisa knows that people think she’s a girly gossip, but she really wants to get rid of that view people have on her so that she can live a more free life.

The chatter continues. Some people don’t really care about gossip. They’re the smart ones, ignoring others’ opinions and focusing on being themselves. Like a stone wall, harsh words don’t get through to them. But even a stone wall wears down over time.

“You know Lisa right? That weird girl with the flashy accessories?”

“Yeah, what’s her deal anyway? Who’s she tryin’ to impress?”

“I heard that it’s Peter, they always hang out together. What losers!”

Lunch continues, but there are still some students waiting in line for their food. The sister of the girl with the wacky hairstyle writes in her journal while listening to emotional music. While the girl who looks like Susan continues to gossip, the true leader of her friend group sits quietly. She writes poetry and hums a familiar song. The girl with the tablet continues to sit alone and draw in peace. But none of these students are our main characters.

A fifth student sits with Maddie, Susan, Peter, and Lisa. She is carrying a tray piled with food along with her lunch box. Her name is Annie, and she’s wearing a faux raccoon tail hat and a worn plaid shirt with worn jeans. Annie’s eyes are stern but friendly. She’s a tough girl who loves camping and tasty food. Her dad has taken her out hiking and fishing countless times. She’ll eat anything for lunch. She loves meat, and is always down for eating out. Annie’s eyes are much larger than her stomach. This always results in Annie leaving lunch too full and having lots of leftovers to give to her friends. But she doesn’t really mind. Annie volunteers at the local food bank every day, which gives her the opportunity to donate any extra food that she’s gathered during lunch. From time to time, Annie’s friends also volunteer at the food bank. Annie is strong and motivating, but can be insensitive at times. During an everyday conversation, Annie always finds a way to brighten someone’s day. She tends to rush through life, but her friends help her to slow down and appreciate the world around her more.

Almost everyone has settled down to eat. Many students have already finished their lunch. But the chatter is louder than ever. In the end, others’ opinions don’t matter. But even still, when a person spends too much time taunting people and belittling friendship, they get annoying. People start ignoring them and getting bored of them. Sometimes, one has to wonder if that person turned out well.

“Do you know Annie?”

“Yeah, she’s that tomboy. What’s her deal?”

“She can be so insensitive, giving false motivation. What a hypocrite.”

Lunch begins to close. Students are finishing their food and packing up. The coordinated girls reunite and begin heading back to class. The strange friends of the regular guy begin finishing up, but still chatter. Everyone else, including the bratty kid and the artistic girl, throw out their trash and begin to leave. But none of them are our main characters.

Before lunch begins to end, one last person sits with his friends. He arrives at the table with Annie. His name was Chris. Chris is considered a nerd. He wears large glasses, a bowtie with a school uniform, and has his hair slicked back. Chris is shorter than his friends. He’s a studious kid who loves reading and math. Chris was the last to join his friend group. When he first joined, he was apprehensive. He was too scared to ask them to let him join their group. But what he wanted more than anything else was to have a group of friends he could be a part of. He simply needed to build up his courage. His lunch normally consists of hard boiled eggs, tuna, and salty crackers. Chris is kind, but is also shy and awkward. During an everyday conversation, Chris is the type of person who listens, but really wants to speak. He may be shy, but he has his friends to take care of him and help him become more social.

The cafeteria is almost empty, but the chatter still lingers. The students walk back to class, yet our six main characters still remain, being the last ones to pack up and leave. In the end, gossip doesn't matter. Only your own actions matter. In the future, things may get better. Sometimes, it doesn't get better. The best we can do is make the best of it. But we must also strive to improve our lives for the better.

“You know Chris, right?”

“Who?”

“The kid who always follows Annie around. He's like her minion or something.”

“Oh yeah, the egghead! He just, like, doesn't stand out to me a lot.”

Finally, everyone leaves, heading back to class and taking their noisy chatter with them. The garbled gossip fades away, leaving the cafeteria empty. But just because lunch is over doesn’t mean that the story is. A show always begins on an empty stage. Just like a play, the story is only just beginning...

#chronicles of sturgia #oc #Madeline Avarell #Susan Avarell #peter #lisa #annie #chris #my art

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ciaossu-imagines · 6 years

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prompt 4&7 for dino and fon maybe? also your last prompt answer makes me laugh omg bless you

Always glad to amuse someone! Most people who know me irl don’t find me all that funny (I get told to stop being a smartass way too many times) so it’s gratifying that some of you guys do! Onto the actual request though - prompt four is limited to one word if the request is above a single character request so could you let me know which word you want? (It’s just to make these requests quick and easy to get out, sorry) Prompt 7 had no limit though - they’re nothing but easy!

Dino

“Autumn” or “Fall?

Dino’s never called it fall and never heard the saying before he met and befriended an American mafia kid during his school days. He’s always referred to the season as autumn and still does even if the other person calls it fall...it just sounds weird to him to call it that.

Pumpkin Carving or Apple Picking?

Pumpkin carving all the way. While he doesn’t mind apple picking, it’s a little too relaxed and sedate for Dino to maintain interest in it for more than a half an hour at most. He loves pumpkin carving though since there’s so much to it - you need to choose the perfect pumpkin, pick it, haul it to wherever you’re going to be carving it, decide on your design, scoop out the pumpkin cuts, actually carve the design...it’s just active and a constant process which appeals to him far more.

Halloween or Thanksgiving?

Dino prefers Thanksgiving. While he loves Halloween, the childlike fun and the tricks and treats that come with it, he’s a very family oriented person and Thanksgiving is a very family oriented holiday. He likes to have the occasion to really show his appreciation and give his thanks to his family and loved ones.

Cashmere or Flannel?

Dino prefers cashmere. He really likes the extra warmth of it since he can get run a bit cold at times. He probably has a favourite cardigan or something that he throws over a t-shirt or button down that’s made of cashmere - it’s super-soft and comfortable and warm.

Cool and Crisp or Warm and Foggy?

Dino prefers cool and crisp, even if he does get cold. He likes wearing a coat and layers and the cold weather is perfect for that.

Yankee Candles or Roaring Fireplace?

Yankee candles, though he’d never admit to it. He’d be so embarrassed if anyone knew that he liked scented candles as much as he does. In autumn, he really likes more seasonal scents, like the autumn woods or cinnamon stick scents.

Scarves or Berets?

Scarves. Dino doesn’t like berets, they don’t look right on him and they seem too hipsterish and pretentious.

Cinnamon or Nutmeg?

Cinnamon for taste but nutmeg for scent.

Reading a Book or Watching a Movie?

Both. Dino simply cannot choose - it will really depend on his mood what he’d like to do since he loves relaxing in front of a movie but equally enjoys books, especially since he can find a place to relax outside with a good book.

Halloweentown or Nightmare Before Christmas?

Dino likes Halloweentown - it’s just silly and charming. He’s only ever seen the first one though; he just never seems to get around to watching the sequels.

Hot Chocolate or Apple Cider?

Dino prefers hot chocolate, especially if it’s a hot chocolate that’s slightly different, such as a jalapeno spiced hot chocolate or a dark hot chocolate with peppermint pieces or something.

Wool Socks or Slippers?

Dino doesn’t like wool socks, they itch his feet quite a bit. However, he does have a pair of slippers, years old and really beat up, that he loves.

Trick or Treat?

Tricks, most definitely. He’s not a huge eater and though he likes sweets, a good trick and adventure always beats a sweet treat.

Marshmallows or Whipped Cream?

Whipped cream but only if it’s true whipped cream. He really hates Reddiwhip or the canned whipped cream.

Jack or Sally?

Dino likes Jack. He’s only watched Nightmare Before Christmas once and doesn’t remember all of it but he remembers thinking that Jack was a pretty cool character.

Goosebumps or Are You Afraid of the Dark?

The Midnight Society all the way. Goosebumps was more tame and the only thing he remembers from it was the theme music whereas Are You Afraid had some genuinely scary shows and there’s a few episodes he can still tell you the story of, even though he hasn’t watched them in years.

Plaid or Neutrals?

Neutrals. Dino isn’t big into a lot of patterns and he’s not suited to pull off the lumberjack look.

Coffee or Tea?

Dino likes coffee. It’s funny because he used to hate it until Reborn entered his life. He drinks his coffee almost exactly like Reborn drinks his - it ended up being another part of Dino that Reborn strongly influenced.

Studyblr or Halloween Blog?

Studyblr - though he’s relaxed and adventurous, let’s not forget that Dino is extremely intelligent and a well-respected mafia boss who saved his family from financial peril. He appreciates organization, hard work, and all that and studyblrs would appeal more to him.

Red or Gold?

Gold - the yellow leaves are always the first to pop for him when he’s out looking at the changing leaves in autumn.

Blankets or Pillows?

Pillows. Dino can’t sleep without something under his head, whether it be his arm, a pillow, or just his jacket bunched up and stuck under his head. He can easily do without blankets but does need that pillow-like cushion.

Cabins or Cottages?

Cottages. A cabin is always wooden and rustic while cottages can be so many things and take so many shapes. Their versatility appeals to Dino.

Scary or Spoopy?

Dino likes to be scared at times - he doesn’t want to be in actual danger or anything but the thrill of a good scare has its fun.

Sweaters or Boots?

Sweaters all the way but only because Dino really loves his sneakers and, if he could, he’d wear them all year round. They’re just so comfortable.

Caramel Apples or Candy Apples?

Dino actually doesn’t like either of these - he pulled out a filling on a caramel apple as a kid and lost a tooth while eating a candy apple in his early teens. These sweet treats just do not seem to agree with him.

Hay Rides or Leaf Peeking?

Leaf Peeking. He really likes to go for a hike to some really scenic spots, usually by himself. It’s one of the few times he gets to be alone...or as alone as his family allows him to be. He always takes along a camera and has caught some really nice shots.

Fon

“Autumn” or “Fall?

Autumn is the correct term in most of the world and is the one Fon prefers to use. If the person he is speaking to prefers to use fall though, Fon will easily switch over to using fall as well so that the other person feels more at ease in the conversation.

Pumpkin Carving or Apple Picking?

Fon prefers apple picking and is quick at it. He can gather quite a bit and enjoys the physical work of it along with the more spiritual, communing with nature feel of it.

Halloween or Thanksgiving?

Fon prefers Halloween. Halloween is for children first and foremost and Fon has a soft spot for children. Though he doesn’t like to do a lot of celebrate the holiday himself, he will make sure to have treats for trick or treaters and loves seeing all the happy children in their costumes.

Cashmere or Flannel?

Fon likes flannel but only if it’s 100% cotton flannel. He’s allergic to wool.

Cool and Crisp or Warm and Foggy?

Both sides of nature make Fon equally happy. The cool and crisp days are just as nice as warm and foggy days - he enjoys being outside more on the cool and crisp days but enjoys sitting on a porch drinking a hot cup of tea on a warm and foggy morning.

Yankee Candles or Roaring Fireplace?

Fon doesn’t own any scented candles, preferring the real smells of nature or spices. The scent, sound and look of a burning fireplace appeals to him far more - he can happily drift off in front of it.

Scarves or Berets?

Fon wears a scarf if it gets really warm outside but doesn’t like hats overly much - they make his hair really staticky.

Cinnamon or Nutmeg?

Fon prefers nutmeg and uses it in quite a bit of his cooking.

Reading a Book or Watching a Movie?

Fon reads more than he watches television. In the autumn, he likes to read longer novels as opposed to the short stories he frequents in summer.

Halloweentown or Nightmare Before Christmas?

Honestly, unless someone physically made him sit down and watch these all the way through, Fon will make it through his entire life without watching the full movie of either of these.

Hot Chocolate or Apple Cider?

Fon likes hot apple cider. However, he can’t handle it at all when it gets cold; the taste gets much too strong and it makes him gag.

Wool Socks or Slippers?

Again, due to his wool allergy, Fon can’t wear wool socks. He has house slippers but rarely wears them, preferring bare feet whenever possible.

Trick or Treat?

Fon likes the treats of Halloween, though he eats none of them. He likes to give them out though, enjoying how happy it makes others to receive them.

Marshmallows or Whipped Cream?

Neither - Fon doesn’t drink hot cocoa often and prefers it plain when he does.

Jack or Sally?

Again, Fon wouldn’t really understand this reference. He’d be more of a Sally person though as her kind heart and loyalty to Jack would make him root for her happiness.

Goosebumps or Are You Afraid of the Dark?

Fon doesn’t understand this reference either; he really watches very, very little television.

Plaid or Neutrals?

Neither. Fon likes the heavier, more saturated jewel tones that come in autumn, the deep burgundies and burnt oranges.

Coffee or Tea?

While Fon will drink the occasional coffee, he does prefer tea overall, no matter the season.

Studyblr or Halloween Blog?

Halloween blogs would appeal to Fon more, especially if they focused on the more fun, family friendly side of Halloween.

Red or Gold?

Fon’s favourite colour is red so he will always choose a red.

Blankets or Pillows?

Though he truly needs neither of these, Fon would sooner go without a pillow than without a blanket.

Cabins or Cottages?

Cabins are rustic and simple, more natural than cottages and their backwoods simplicity is more suited to Fon.

Scary or Spoopy?

Spoopy all the way. As mentioned, Fon is all about the family friendly side of Halloween rather than the horror and macabre of the holiday.

Sweaters or Boots?

Fon prefers a good pair of boots in the autumn, since he is outdoors a lot during the season.

Caramel Apples or Candy Apples?

If he had to pick, Fon much prefers candy apples for their vibrant colour.

Hay Rides or Leaf Peeking?

Fon enjoys being outside in autumn because of the changing of the season, the leaves colouring and falling and leaf peeking would be something he looks forward to whenever he thinks of autumn.

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brakken · 7 years

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Replayed Life is Strange ep. 5, thoughts below.

Buckle in - I had a lot to say.

I was nervous about revisiting this one. The first time I played, this ending wrecked me. And I mean wrecked. I was in tears for hours. I had trouble sleeping for weeks. I couldn’t think about the game without wanting to cry. I wanted to draw fan art for it, but couldn’t without breaking down. In many ways, I’m still affected by it. This game changed me.

So, I was nervous. And not just because of how hard it hit me the first time, but I was nervous about how I’d react in replaying. Would I notice something I didn’t the first time, that would ruin the experience for me? Would I cry as much? And if I didn’t, would that mean that I didn’t like it as much? How much of that original feeling was satisfaction, and how much was disappointment?

-spoilers ahead for LiS Ep. 5-

I touched on this very briefly last time, but I want to talk about it further here, where it comes more into play:

I do not like the Jefferson twist. Coupled with Rachel’s death, it is a shallow and uninteresting answer to her disappearance, regardless of their attempts to pretty it up with the Prescott’s involvement. Strip away the red herrings and tangled threads, and what you’re left with is a dead girl and a murderer. Jefferson becomes unrecognisable in his unveiled role - his tropey villain dialogue and mannerisms separate him so far from his earlier scenes that it may as well have been an all-new person. Maybe this was the intention, but it reads to me as utterly cliche. How frightening would he have been, had he kept his familiar composure? How much more menacing, now that his mannerisms are given a horrific context?

Even within the narrative, his portrayal in this episode feels completely wrong. Jefferson goes from a man with a sick passion for capturing true innocence, to one willing to murder multiple people. It is never understood that murder is part of his pattern. Rachel’s death was an accident at Nathan’s hands, yet now we have Jefferson killing him, Chloe, Victoria, and the intention to kill Max, all with nary a hint of remorse or doubt. He is just the bad guy now - plain and simple. And in a game where so much else is designed to be not so clean-cut, that’s... pretty boring.

With that out of the way, I do think the scenes themselves are done well. Awakening in the dark room is genuinely tense and scary - moreso with Victoria present. Desperately hopping in and out of photographs to different moments of captivity is incredibly effective - it packs on such helplessness and danger.

And even while not being thrilled with Jefferson as the villain, and while understanding it would soon fall apart, it is incredibly satisfying to help Max attain the following victories via time-hopping. A lot of the game focuses on retreading conversations with new information, and consequently, Max displays boosted confidence upon these repetitions. Returning to the first scene is where this is at its peak. She knows everything - and she’s powerful. It’s also in parts like this where I would like to applaud the designers for having a clear vision from the outset (even if I wasn’t entirely thrilled with aspects of that vision).

A really strong story-telling tool is introducing a solution before the problem arrives, to trick the audience into thinking it’s unimportant until the reveal. Having us take the selfie right at the start of the game is a great use of this. What seemed like just a moment in a scene becomes absolutely vital - but only after we discover we can rewind with photographs. (this is also why the ep.4 Warren moment feels so weirdly deliberate. We already know how her powers work by this point so we’re paying attention every time a new photo is taken.)

I’d been put the ending off for a while.

Once I played up to the art gallery, I took a break and then just... left it there. Left Max in a peaceful moment.

I wasn’t ready.

But lately it seemed like the real world was telling me to return to it. After a week with no breeze, the wind began picking up, and it looked like there could be rain. I found myself idly doodling Chloe and Max in my intervals between work. I had someone here ask me if I’d be writing thoughts for episode 5. I was discovering new music that aligned all too well with where I was at with the characters.

So, I finally decided it was time, and sat down, and finished playing. Only the next morning did I realise I’d done so on October 11, the in-game day of the storm.

Before moving into the next act of the episode, I want to say I really appreciate the way they’ve sculpted so many different ways to apply Max’s rewind power. It’s great that they’re able to keep surprising me while not emptying their cache too quickly. However, I reaaally wish (and was expecting) that time-freezing would make a return in this finale. It’s used well in ep.2 with Kate, but I feel like it introduced a new threat that is never paid off. Once it’s established that Max’s power can weaken her to the point where it doesn’t function, there is now a looming danger for when that will happen again - maybe this time, the cost will be Chloe, or the town, or even Max herself. But it never does. The closest we get is when Chloe is shot at the end of ep.4, but the power's failure is more directly from Jefferson’s sedation, rather than a weakness on Max’s part. And when she does falter again, it manifests as a prolonged out-of-nowhere dream sequence. There’s some creative stuff present there, but it also stands as a missed opportunity to toy further with tangible peril.

On with the escape. Don’t have much to say here. I may not have been happy with his new portrayal, but it’s still satisfying to watch Jefferson get taken down. It’s nice to see David on the same team as Max, and it’s a good start to a series of character farewell scenes.

Followed closely by a bad one.

Nathan is thrown to the wayside to an unforgivable degree here. He’s been pivotal in Max and Chloe’s connection uptil now, even though a lot of that happens off-screen. But as soon as he’s no longer the main threat, his presence, character, and life are all discarded. His phone message in the car provides some closure, but is far too little too late and serves more as insult to injury than any kind of saving face.

Meanwhile, Warren, a character with more screentime than Nathan but of relative unimportance to the main story, is given a spotlighted farewell. I don’t get this. I have no harsh feelings against Warren, but insofar as his relevance to Max and Chloe’s arcs, he is a sideliner. Since his primary presence has centred around a potential romance for Max, his farewell scene should be treated with an equal amount of focus. It really annoys me that you are forced to tell him about Max’s powers - there is no way to opt out of it, and all it leads to is him guilt-tripping Max with ‘Chaos Theory’ and ‘choosing the right thing’, which the game is about to throw at us anyway in the dream sequence. It’s also unjust to the scene’s purpose, which is a farewell. We may not fully know it, but we’re saying goodbye to these characters one by one. We’ve just come away from our farewells with Joyce and Frank, and all Warren wants to do is talk plot. But whatevs, I still hugged him.

The confession about letting William die was painful. I wasn’t predicting it to come up again, and by this point it felt like so long ago. And yet, it works. We’ve returned to a Chloe who’s early off of discovering Rachel’s death - and she doesn’t want to listen. And we need her to listen. Most conversations in the game can’t lead to a failure, but I find it really interesting that this one does.

I’m very conflicted about the dream sequence. Conceptually, I love it. I love when games mess with their established order, and they’re certainly evoking a feeling of helplessness in me upon returning once again to that damn classroom. But, it rubs me the wrong way here, too. We’ve beaten the mini-boss of the game. We defeated Jefferson. Yet the final time we see him is here, forcing us to say words we don’t want to, and watch him take photos of Chloe with us strapped to a chair. I get this is Max internalising her insecurities... but we beat him. We’re onto the final boss, now - the storm. Jefferson is obsolete at this point, and there’s no rhyme or reason to show him in power again.

(sidebar: the bottle-collecting in the hide-and-seek segment was confusing and dumb and made me angry that they were still injecting completion rewards this late in the story)

I also don’t like the Dark Room sequence of the dream, because it villainises Chloe. All the other sequences present us with twisted versions of Arcadia Bay residents. Dead versions, cruel versions. We’re witnessing the weight of guilt that coincides with the coming choice, culminating in an encounter with the Other Max, and Chloe saving us from her. This should have been Chloe’s first appearance in the dream. The Dark Room sequence where she jeers at Max’s shortcomings seems so out of place with the rest of what is being said. I think this is especially noticeable given the following walk down memory lane, showing us everything we’ll lose on the alternate side of the choice.

(sidebar: I wish that the walk had been done better - I never knew when to stop and listen to the voiceovers and when to continue onto the next highlighted moment, and it was always jarring whenever the dialogue got interrupted)

I was fully ready for Rachel to appear in this dream, in some form or another. With everything culminating, and Max messing more with time, coupled with how blunt they were to put Rachel in the ground in the previous ep, I was waiting and I was hoping. But she never showed. And I don’t understand why. As I said with Nathan, Rachel is integral in the centric plotline of Max and Chloe’s reunion. I need to stress this - even though she’s never seen on-screen, she is a dominating factor in our two main characters’ growth, and is little more than a footnote in this finale.

What we get instead at the end of this dream, is Other Max. I don’t have much to say about her. In my eyes she’s very much just a culmination of the dream thusfar. She doesn’t represent much to me beyond that, except a missed opportunity to meet Rachel and find out what the hell is going on.

Can we touch on that quickly, before the final scene? What the hell is going on? I don’t want to have everything bluntly spelled out, but... did the designers really feel like they’d laid enough groundwork that the answer should be obvious? When Chloe hamfistedly states it’s a mystery we’ll ‘obviously never figure out’... damn. That hurts. I mean, I have my own theory - I like it, and it’s the lens I choose to view the story through. But it’s unfair to put it on the players to do this heavy-lifting. We relied on the designers to draw the path for us to follow, and they took us to a dead end.

So let’s talk about the final choice. Even in replaying, and with the dream sequence’s attempts to balance the scales last-minute, my decision here still remained the same, for a couple of reasons. The first being the game’s true title, as I have mentioned earlier - ‘Save Chloe: The Game’. And hey, this doesn’t suddenly change in the final episode. This was, for me, the fixed goal as soon as I caught onto it. And to save Chloe here, she needs to be able to live past her grief. Contrasted to the alternate Chloe, whose prison was inescapable - saving her came from letting her go. But here, we need to hold on.

Hold on, hold on, hold on.

My second main reason is Max’s character growth, and the overall narrative. This young girl is warned of a coming storm, and is then given time-altering powers. And she is constantly asking why. Not just why she got powers, but what she is meant to learn from having them. On the surface, what she learns is ‘don’t mess with time a bunch because a storm will happen’ and with that you can lean either way on the choice. But if I was going to carve right to the heart, I see the story saying ‘you can’t fix all your mistakes, but you can move through the consequences and grow in the aftermath.’ Every problem she's faced in the story uptil this point, she has tampered with to some degree in order to solve. And to do so, again, for this final decision, would make her arc amount to nothing. This needs to be different from letting William die, otherwise the game could have ended there. There is no easy decision, but the storm is here. All the pieces lie where they fell, both good and bad.

I’m tearing this damn photograph.

All that said, I can’t and won’t fault anyone for going the other way. I haven’t played or watched the alternate ending, so far all I know it performs well and ticks story checkboxes that I can’t see over here on the ‘bae’ side.

This choice felt and still feels like the right one to me. From outside the narrative, I can certainly weigh the options and see sacrificing Chloe as the more viable. (though if you want to talk pragmatism, there is absolutely no reason why either of them should think that letting Chloe die should fix everything)

But while it’s important to ask ‘what would I do?’, it’s also been immensely important to me in these playthroughs to ask ‘what would Max do?’, or further, ‘what could Max do?’

So that was my choice. As I said at the beginning, I was nervous as to how I’d feel at the end, after having been so deeply affected the first time. And now, after crying through the whole epilogue, I found myself wondering if I’d cried enough. I looked up the scene online and watched it again, and cried. And then again, and cried. But what was this empty feeling? Is this what it felt like before, or was something blocking me from experiencing it properly?

After stepping outside into the 4am light, and then another rewatch, I realised I was, in a way, messing with time. Trying to force things, just like Max was. I even had my own Other Max in my head, making me question my own thoughts and feelings. So it was time to let it be what it was, and move on. I couldn’t recreate my first play, but I could let myself get swept up in this one.

Since finishing the game, it’s been raining non-stop here. I’ve kept inside, surrounded by the aftermath of this playthrough.

Playing this game changed me. For all it did right and all it did wrong, I was affected. It’s the first time in my life that I’ve consciously noted a tangible shift in who I am as a person. It’s brought me closer to my emotions, and has altered my creativity. It made me revise one of my comic ideas into a game - something I would never have considered on my own.

Even with all these thoughts, I reckon this comic I made accurately sums up my whole experience.

And as I’ve done each time, here are my favourite moments from this episode:

-'I’ll always be with you.’ ‘Forever.’

-Clasping hands, as the storm rages.

-Max, unable to watch, leaning into Chloe, who looks on with newfound strength.

-Driving through the town, now in pieces. Max, too, in pieces.

-Max’s weak smile when Chloe moves to comfort her. It’s going to be okay. They’re together.

(heck, I cried just typing those out, I am so done, haha)

To anybody who read this far - thank you so, so much. This game holds a lot of emotional value to me, and hence these write-ups are probably the most personal thing I’ve put out here for people to see. So thank you for taking the time to look at this. I hope you’re having a wonderful day.

Wah, this was all in preparation for the first episode of Before the Storm, and now episode 2 is about to be released. I gotta dig in!

As always, here’s a lil sketch <3

#max talks about life is strange

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owl-eyed-woman · 7 years

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Attack on Titan Season 2 Episode 36 Analysis Part 5: An Ode to the Ensemble

AOT has always been a type of ensemble show, incorporating dozens of characters, several competing factions and so many weird sounding names that you can’t possibly remember all of them. This large and varied cast is crucial for creating a sprawling, complex world filled with countless people who, alongside our main characters, are struggling with the same, trying circumstances. At least, that’s the intended effect.

The downside of having such a large cast, however, is that you actually need to develop them or they might start to seem like extraneous titan fodder. AOT has definitely fallen into this trap before.

To be fair, fixing this issue is not as simple as just developing every single character into multi-dimensional human beings; this would just bog the story down with superfluous detail. Still, far too often, interactions with this expansive side cast have used them as cameos not characters, relying on weird quirks to differentiate rather than authentic characterisation.

Thankfully, this season has clearly recognised this shortcoming and started to shine a light on thus far overlooked and underutilised characters. We’ve moved away from Eren, Armin and Mikasa and have instead focused on the secondary characters in the cadet corps. With this shift, AOT has truly begun to excel as an ensemble piece.

In the context of this season-wide reframing and refocusing, however, this episode is actually a bit of an outlier as it re-centres a lot of the action around Mikasa and Armin. But fear not, the side-characters have their time in the spotlight!

Obviously, a lot has happened in this season which, may I remind you, has spanned less than two days. There’s a lot to process and with barely a second to rest, everyone is undoubtedly struggling physically, mentally and emotionally. With this in mind, this episode grants our precious side characters a chance to finally address the most shocking twist of the season: Reiner and Bertholdt’s betrayal.

AOT has spent several episodes examining (and re-examining and then re-examining again) the various nuances of Eren’s emotional fallout from this betrayal, but the questions still remains: what about the other cadets? They, like Eren, trusted Bertholdt and Reiner unconditionally, counting them as comrade and companion through thick and thin. It only follows that their emotional fallout is just as cutting and devastating as Eren’s.

So as Sasha, Jean, Connie, Armin and Mikasa converge atop Reiner, surrounding the encased Bertholdt, it becomes a type of twisted family reunion, where past resentments and remembrances are dredged up and brought out into the open. How is everyone holding up?

Well, unsurprisingly, they’re confused and hurt! Who’da thunk? Each of them express this pain differently, coping in their own flawed ways. Sasha is simply in a state of disbelief. Connie, my sweet, dense boy, almost seems in a state of denial that they could have lied to them for so long whilst Jean’s snarky rejoinders hide his obvious distress.

There’s a lot these characters need to express openly in order to truly start healing and moving on from this betrayal, more than can be said in this brief conversation. Jean’s words cut to the heart of the matter as he vehemently tells them that they can’t just, literally and figuratively, run away from them and the three years of friendship they shared. It’s a desperate and raw attempt to appeal to Bertholdt and Reiner’s humanity that they now fear was only a façade.

They all desperately want to understand why this has happened and find some type of explanation for their betrayal after they’ve trusted them for so long but there is no satisfactory answer. In the end, while this brief conversation does allow for some emotional catharsis, it ultimately remains one-sided, unsatisfying and futile. Reiner and Bertholdt remain unmoved.

In the scheme of this episode, this is only one brief exchange, but it still shows us the genuine effort AOT has made this season to add depth and complexity to initially flat and simple characters. But after all this welcome effort, one character still remains obscured: Bertholdt. I’ve often joked that I only know two things about Bertholdt: 1. He is quiet and 2. He is tall. But honestly, there’s a lot of truth in this ridiculous, reductive statement. Who is Bertholdt? What motivates him? Why did he commit such horrific acts as the Colossal Titan?

Despite Eren and Mikasa’s virulent insistence to the contrary, AOT has been hinting heavily that Bertholdt and Reiner are more than just two irredeemable monsters who hate all of humanity; there’s another side to their betrayal.

We know that Reiner has struggled with his crimes, splitting his personality in twain just to cope with the guilt, but Bertholdt’s position has remained mysterious throughout this entire affair. Not even his friends’ desperate pleas are able to elicit any reaction or explanation from Bertholdt.

Interestingly, it’s Mikasa’s brutally pragmatic dismissal that gets a response out of the consistently aloof Bertholdt. Unlike the other cadets, Mikasa never seemed particularly close to Bertholdt or Reiner, and now, after what they’ve done, she couldn’t give two fucks about either of them. She doesn’t care about any purported humanity or moral nuance. In fact, she actively rejects its existence and rejects its relevance. They are her enemy now and that’s all she needs to know.

It’s this blunt dismissal that challenges Bertholdt to prove his humanity, to prove that they aren’t just monsters to be vanquished. As tears stream down his face, Bertholdt finally reaches his breaking point and reveals all. It is at once heartbreaking, humanising and horrifying.

He has no delusions about what they did, no declarations of moral righteousness, no smarmy excuses; just a soul-crushing awareness of the evil, disgusting crimes that they have committed. Like Reiner, Bertholdt has been consumed by guilt and self-hatred because of their atrocious actions; he’s just better at hiding it. He knows they deserve to die for what they’ve done.

It’s honestly a relief to have explicit confirmation that they didn’t want to kill all those people. I know AOT is a story about literal monsters, but I guess I don’t want to believe that someone could happily murder so many innocents unless they were literally inhuman. Then again, maybe that’s naïve; AOT’s central government forced its citizens into a suicide mission in order to cull the population. Such atrocities are the order of the day for human society as a whole. But I digress.

Significantly, Bertholdt also admits that he sincerely cared about his comrades during his time as a soldier in the 104th cadet corps, even if it was just a reprieve from this guilt. Their years undercover weren’t just part of the job, but rather, a brief refuge from the reality of their deeds. In the end, Reiner and Bertholdt were so good at playing make-believe soldiers because they desperately wanted to believe they were just innocent soldiers, if only for a while.

It’s a potent reminder that though Eren may dismiss them as monsters, even the most despicable people are still human beings. It’s easy to completely write off people after they do evil things or betray us but if we can’t acknowledge the humanity in our enemies, we’ll never truly comprehend our own innate potential for both cruelty and kindness. We’re all complicated, we all contain multitudes and if AOT has taught us anything, we’re all capable of terrible things.

With that said, there’s only so much sympathy we can extend towards those actively trying to eradicate countless human lives. Yes, this distraught assertion of humanity and admission of guilt is genuinely moving, but Bertholdt and Reiner still made the choice to commit these crimes and stain their hands with innocent blood. I’ve been hard on Mikasa in my past analysis, but her to-the-point demand for Eren’s return is ultimately the correct response to the situation; any sympathy is pointless if they are still trying to destroy humanity.

This episode didn’t have to give so much runtime to these minor characters; it could have simply coasted on its action and gore and twists and turns. But still, in this single, tiny scene, AOT manages to do so much and is so much stronger for its inclusion. I truly appreciate this show’s continued effort to imbue its characters with complexity and humanity. This is why I’ve spent 5 whole posts analysing, or, if we’re being honest, rambling on about this single episode.

If you’re interested, I’ve linked to my other articles below expanding on other parts of this episode.

Links: Part 1: Why I Love this Show Part 2: Ymir and Christa Part 3: Mikasa, Co-dependency and Morality Part 4: Armin and Sacrifice

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christiandoenges · 6 years

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Kevin Smith, The Continuation of Style, and What it Means to be an Auteur

In 1994, Clerks debuted at Sundance, jumpstarting the career of young filmmaker Kevin Smith. Made on a shoestring budget, this grainy, raunchy, quirky comedy made its way into the spotlight, and quickly became a household name, thrusting Smith into the Hollywood scene. In the years since his debut, Smith has made many films, on both independent and Hollywood budgets. Die-hard fans of Smith have stuck with him over the decades, even when his big-budget films are critically panned at the box office, such as his 2010 effort Cop Out. However, despite the critical acclaim or disdain Kevin Smith may receive, he has a distinctive style when creating his films. This paper sets out to explore how Kevin Smith crafts his films, on both low and high budgets. This includes how he writes his stories and characters, along with how he shoots his films, while finally answering the question ‘Can Kevin Smith be considered an auteur?’.

Clerks debuted in the midst of the independent film boom of the 1990s. The film’s grainy, black-and-white style, matched with minimalist shots fit in perfectly with the do-it-yourself feeling that was present during this time. Clerks is not a complexly-shot film; most of its scenes are shot/counter-shot conversations between two characters, or one camera pointing at characters during dialogue. Smith has even said this himself; when asked if he is a stronger writer or director, he had this to say: “A writer. I just don’t think I have a directorial instinct. I think it all comes from writing and that’s why the films don’t have a fantastic visual style to them. In fact, there’s no visual style to them. There’s a lot of banter and a lot of talk.” (Smith).

However, for many people, this is what made Clerks so interesting and cool. It didn’t pretend to be anything more than it was, which is representative of Smith, too, in a way. While researching Kevin Smith, I found that ever since he was a kid, he has been infatuated with comic books, and writing and drawing them. In fact, Smith writes his films similarly to the way one would write a comic book series. Many of his movies take place in what he refers to as “The Askewniverse”. This “universe” contains the characters, cities, and events that happen in most of Smith’s films, just like how a comic book universe, like the Marvel Universe, would contain all of its superheroes and worlds. This approach to writing films feels very organic and personal, with Robert Ebert describing it as a “...great invention, a natural feel for human comedy, and a knack for writing weird, sometimes brilliant, dialogue.” (Ebert) in his review when the film was initially released. When watching Clerks, and listening to the dialogue written by Smith, the viewer gets a sense that he is writing about experiences that he is very familiar with. This gives the dialogue a genuine feel to it, since Smith seems to know what he’s writing about, like he has actually experienced these situations he is putting on the screen. However, it can also feel amateur and immature after some time. This way of writing is fine for Clerks, since it was Smith’s debut, and therefore it couldn’t be compared to any other works of his, but as one continues through his catalogue of films, a pattern quickly emerges when looking at Kevin Smith’s dialogue choices. Clerks, Clerks II, and Mallrats all share a common theme of raunchy, immature, and frankly gross dialogue that is entertaining in Smith’s debut, but quickly grows tiresome when that is all the viewer is exposed to. The writing in Clerks, albeit focused on gross topics, is still smartly written, and comes off as witty, without trying too hard. However, if one was to watch a clip from Clerks II, they would recognize Smith’s characters, because frankly, they don’t grow at all between the two films, and neither does their writing. Clerks II takes places ten years after Clerks, and yet the writing did not age at all.The raunchy humor loses its wittiness, and instead feels forced in Smith’s later films. Most of his big-budget films do not take place in his “universe”, and yet the writing feels like it could. In Cop Out, for example, Smith relies heavily on jokes involving raunchy descriptions of sexual innuendos, and continues with the vivid bathroom humor, both elements that audiences were introduced to in Clerks, 15 years prior. Die-hard fans of Smith may appreciate this continuation of style, because it fulfills their expectations that they have built-up over past films of his, but new viewers may not like what they hear.

Smith himself has said that he is not much of a director, and instead focuses on the writing aspect. This actually has lead to him developing a style of sorts. This style is very simple, often medium-long shots of characters talking to one another, and close-up shots of action. The former example is littered all over Smith’s films, and really is what the rest of the film is built on. An example of the latter is in Clerks when Dante is opening the store, Smith uses close shots of him snipping the string holding the newspapers. This simple way of shooting scenes shifts the focus of the film from the visuals to the dialogue, which is what Smith wants. By giving the audience nothing of much interest to look at, he forces them to listen to what is going on in the scene, playing upon his strengths as a writer. While this is a clever way to direct your shoestring-budget debut in 1994, it is surprising that Smith has decided to carry this practice on in his later films. This could be an answer as to why Smith’s big-budget films always seem to be critically panned at the box office. While his quirky style may work on the independent circuit, large audiences are not satisfied with barebones shots of two characters talking. It is simply not entertaining anymore after he has used the practice for so many years. Again, Smith shows consistency in his work, giving the feeling that he is always creating these films exactly how he sees them, and not giving much thought to what a larger audience may desire.

Over the course of his career, Kevin Smith has certainly developed a personal style, but does this carry over into being considered an auteur? By definition, an auteur expresses great creative control in their films, and this leads to their styles being recognizable. So it is this creative control that really becomes the deciding factor for whether or not someone makes the cut. Smith surely shows a continued style in both his writing and directing, but how do these translate into control? His writing, although consistent, does not show much merit. What began as snarky, witty dialogue that dealt with gross topics, it transitioned into a lazier style, but still dealing with the same topics. For his directing, Smith began his career by relying on shot/counter-shot, and medium shots on subjects’ conversations, and he has stuck with that method since. Cop Out, which was made on a much higher budget than Clerks, is certainly flashier than its predecessor, but the muscle memory that Smith has for shooting scenes is still there. We continue to see shot/counter-shot, and simple shots focusing on dialogue throughout the film. It could be argued that this completes Smith’s style of creating films, when in reality, it is more likely that this is simply a crutch that he has developed over his career. When discussing Smith and his style, Andy Williams states that “...usually his [Smith] films are distinctive; his style is that he has no style.” (Williams). Just because a filmmaker expresses consistency in their work does not make them an auteur. Smith misses the mark for holding this title at a fundamental level, simply because he lacks the creative control of other directors. Directors such as Wes Anderson utilize familiarly-styled shots, such as his perfectly-centered scenes, but use them in ways that are refreshing and fun to watch. Compare this to Smith, who still uses familiar shots, but not in a dynamic way like a true auteur would. Kevin Smith’s career has been built on him taking an uncompromising approach to his work. He writes characters he finds funny, in worlds that he has created and continues to populate with weird, uncomfortable stories. In an article featured in The Guardian, Dave Schilling has similar thoughts on Smith’s career: “If there is one constant in his [Smith’s] career, it’s a marked lack of interest in servicing anyone’s taste but his own.” (Schilling). There is a certain amount of respect that can be given to Smith and this approach, however, this may be overshadowed by the many grievances fans and critics have of his film career. Realistically, Smith will continue his career with raunchy, simple films, continuing to carve himself into Hollywood history as a would-be auteur.

#essay #film #kevin smith #movies #auteur

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