If it's not too much trouble would you mind sharing more on your thoughts about AJ? Esp the line she shouted at Rarity and her "struggle with sexual identity" I'm kind of new so I would like to hear more! Does Rarity also struggle with sexual identity and fearing AJ would leave? I love the family oriented person A and the business inclined and impressed by shiny new things person B trope
Ok, this is gonna get into head canons and personal opinions.
The writing in Rollercoaster of Friendship (and EQG as a whole) is much simpler and more stripped down in comparison to FiM (most likely to appeal to a younger audience; don't want to seem like I'm dissing the writers), but that one confrontation made me sit up in my seat because it carries the entire special.
More under the cut cuz I don't want MLP analyses clogging up my blog.
For one, we've seen AJ get frustrated and angry about the same exact conflict over a girl in FiM (Rara), establishing a pattern. And even though she's right (her friend really is being manipulated), I read both cases as her acting out in jealousy too. Here's this girl who she's felt a unique attachment to being "taken away" and changed by someone new. This is most apparent in RoF; the moment Vignette introduces herself, kisses Rarity on both cheeks, and establishes herself as Rarity's "new best friend," AJ immediately reacts with shock, betrayal, and boldfaced jealousy (made even worse when Rarity forgets her during introductions). Although AJ acts independent, she's actually very emotionally dependent on certain people in her life.
If we come into this with the assumption that AJ has romantic feelings for Rarity –– which is a normal assumption given the director/writer confirmed the special was written as a romantic drama between the two –– AJ's line is all the more heartbreaking. If I may slip into fictional speculation: your crush is no longer listening or paying attention to you, even though you know something is wrong and that she's getting hurt. Your frustration at her lack of awareness is really your anger at her lack of care –– she doesn't care about you anymore. So in a fit of rage, in your big, dramatic confrontation, just to make her look at you, react at you, feel how she's been making you feel all day –– unwanted and unspecial –– you hurt her back. AJ yells, "You're not special!" and Rarity cries.
And what really gets me is that AJ lies. In this moment, she lies that Rarity's not special when (again, assumption of romance) she's the most special person in the world to her. So special that she's placed all her feelings of self-assurance and security on their relationship. So special that the moment their relationship is shaken and she doesn't know to recover it –– recover herself –– she lashes out, acts against her character, and says something dishonest just to hurt the girl she loves.
(Honestly, rewatching this special, AJ is so insecure and attention-needy. The way she pouts and slouches and lags behind the group and says, "Never mind. It's nothing," when asked what's wrong is textbook "please pay attention to me and ask me what's wrong because i need a reason to be honest about feelings i know i should be ashamed of" behavior.)
I think AJ's insecurities (which could be tied to her lack of experience with romantic relationships) reveal how she has a tendency to misattribute and redirect anger onto the person she cares most about (see Simple Ways as well, where she's caught on the opposite end of a jealousy spat). This could easily become a very toxic trait, but AJ grows past it. Near the end of RoF, the two come together and apologize. AJ recognizes her entitlement and confesses her insecurities about their relationship. She felt hurt and attacked when her status as Rarity's best friend/girlfriend was threatened because it's a role she uses to self-identify –– if Rarity isn't hers, she loses part of her identity. And she admits that she thought her motivation was to protect Rarity, but really she was just being selfish and protecting herself. Rarity was busy and stressed and needed someone to lean on just as much AJ needed her. She isn't AJ's emotional support girlfriend, and it wasn't right to expect her to be one.
(Which is why Rarijack is peak because throughout both series, they repeatedly show just how important honesty, open communication, and trust is in maintaining, supporting, and growing a romantic relationship.)
247 notes
·
View notes
tagged by my cool awesome buddy @redstringraven in this post!
heads up, seven up!
rules: post the last seven lines you wrote, then tag seven people. reposting, as the reblog chains get long!
Interpreting seven lines as last seven paragraphs just so y'all can have a somewhat coherent snippet from the end of a scene I wrote for the Roadtrip AU. We got some gayyy boys over here /aff
Fingers intertwine with his, the matching rings clinking together softly. Usagi brings the hand up to his lips and kisses his knuckles lightly. Leo chuckles and mirrors him, feeling the warmth of his husband’s fingers against his mouth.
“How was your day, Hamato-Miyamoto-san?” Usagi whispers into the darkness.
Leo’s heart thumps, “It was Wonderful. How was yours, Hamato-Miyamoto Usagi?”
“The same,” Leo can practically see Usagi’s smile. “And More.”
Sleepily, he leans his head forward until their foreheads touch, “I’m glad.”
“Me too,” Usagi breathes.
Connected physically, mentally, and spiritually, knees knocking together and hands still linked, Leo and Usagi fall asleep with ease.
Wow, these two corny ass romantics. Anyways, tagging more buddies! No pressure, though!! @deadpool1763492 @forestwhisper3 @ccomilk @sibillascribbles08 @punctuated-equilibrium @halogalopaghost @brytehowlite (Also, actively inviting you to share whatever writing you wish, even if it isn't TMNT-related)
60 notes
·
View notes
it's hard for me to hold anger. it is a terrifying emotion to me - i flinch so easily. i don't like how quickly it spirals out of control. i feel selfish when i cut people off, stand up for myself - i feel like i am making mountains out of molehills.
any time i lash out, i wonder: am i turning into him? i give people too-many-chances, telling others: well, i might have overreacted. i shut down. bite my tongue. i hate that, at some point, i can be goaded into reacting, into letting go. i hate who i am when i'm angry - someone mean, quick-tongued, willing to cut to bone.
i am angry about what happened to me. i am angry about the ways other people saw what was happening and allowed it to continue. i am angry for the ways it was excused. for the ways i never got an apology, nor should i ever expect one. i am angry i let myself get used. i am angry for the ways i wasted my time and the ways i let myself be fooled. i am angry knowing - you don't care what you did to me. i am angry knowing - you'd rather burn apart our connection than actually consider my feelings.
i feel this anger tangled, brewing, constant - that i will never be able to reach a peace about it, because the anger just bristles, flaring in the center of it. i'm terrified of it - what if this is who i really am, and everything else is just veneer? if i really want to main & hurt & tear down until i have rendered the world into ice?
any impulse i have for self-preservation has become shadowed in a strange selflessness instead. maladaptive, i give and give and give, worried that i might be mistaken for someone who would take without asking. i owe so many current friendships to people who accepted my apologies and who gave me second chances - who am i to ever deny someone the right try again? when in the back of my head the kicked dog snarls a warning - she is lying - i turn my head. i tell the dog to shush. i tell the dog not to bite. i say we lie too sometimes. i say we will try to be honest and good and whole and if we are very-perfect, we'll never have to fight. i would rather lie down and accept the blow than be the one wielding the knife.
my sister sighs on the phone with me last night. you always go too far with patience, and let too many people use you.
i am worried i am a creature of extremes. that if i unleash, i will spill out, fill the room with smoke, destroy everything. i sigh too and tell her: well, but i don't wanna be mean.
2K notes
·
View notes