#so dear 5 or so followers have this rant in case you are too!

[whoknoes222]

people will always make art. i feel like it's important for people to understand this. AI can do the lines and colors but even if it became as skilled as a human it cannot make art. it can make 1000 of the same 1000 pictures it was fed, it can't make a new piece from it any more than a monkey typing Shakespear knows how to write.

and if AI art takes over (which is literally impossible, let me set that fear aside right fucking now)? well we'll still make fucking art. if art isn't profitable we'll make it. if art was illegal we'd make it. art is something quite inherent to humanity and nothing will remove it, especially some bargain bin toasters trying to be picasso. the biggest threat they pose is the same threat as the corporate art style: at most seeing some more bland as shit than usual billboards.

[bloody-bee-tea]

Kaebedo Week 2023 Day 5 - Confession ~ Artworks

Albedo notices two minutes into his rant about work that Kaeya is not giving him his full attention. It would sting, if Albedo wouldn’t notice as well that it’s not for a lack of interest on Kaeay’s part and more because something else is keeping his attention. 

Something that makes Kaeya tense and his eyes narrow.

So far he hasn’t said anything and he also hasn’t given any indication that he wants Albedo to worry as well, so he simply goes on with his detailed explanation. 

He knows that most of it goes straight over Kaeya’s head–though he usually follows along better than most–and yet even distracted as Kaeya is, he never once gives him the impression of being bored.

Still, Albedo gives him another two minutes before whatever it is that distracts Kaeya wins. And right on the dot, Kaeya gives him a winning smile.

“Albedo, dear, if you would excuse me for just a second,” he interrupts Albedo who doesn’t even manage to agree before Kaeya leaves for the guy two tables to their right.

There’s a telltale warmth in Albedo’s chest as the word dear lingers in his mind but he tries his best to ignore it as he watches Kaeya speak with the other guy. It doesn’t seem to be quite a friendly conversation–Kaeya’s smile is just a little bit too sharp for that–but he frowns when Kaeya slides a piece of paper into his pocket.

He leaves the shocked guy with one last threat it seems before he makes his way back to Albedo, where he sits back down as if nothing at all happened.

“What’s wrong?” Albedo asks, watching as the guy hastily downs his coffee and then scrambles away.

Clearly Kaeya doesn’t suspect a threat because he lets the guy leave without a second look but something must have bothered him nonetheless.

Albedo drags his eyes back to Kaeya when he throws the piece of paper down on the table.

“The creep sketched us.” There’s anger in his voice and Albedo sees how tense he still is.

“Sketched us,” Albedo mumbles as he takes the paper and quickly unfolds it.

True to Kaeya’s words he’s greeted with a sketch of them both over lunch and while it’s not half bad, Albedo immediately hones in on all the ways the guy got Kaeya wrong.

He’s not the easiest subject to draw, Albedo will easily admit that, but even an amateur should try harder with the slope of his shoulder.

Albedo is about to critique the man’s technique when he remembers the anger in Kaeya’s voice.

“You’re angry,” he states the obvious but he trusts Kaeya to understand that it’s also a question.

Albedo doesn’t always understand human emotion and he definitely doesn’t understand Kaeya’s visceral reaction now.

“Of course I’m fucking angry. The creep stared at us during our entire lunch and sketched us without permission. That’s not something you do, Albedo,” Kaeya hisses and stares into the direction the guy ran off to. “Imagine if he had drawn Klee like that, without her permission.”

Albedo doesn’t quite get what’s so upsetting about the first part of Kaeya’s statement but he has to admit that the thought of a stranger staring at Klee for longer periods of time without her knowledge or consent makes him angry as well.

“I see,” he says and makes sure to commit the face to memory, in case he should try something again. “Did he give a reason?” Albedo still can’t help but to ask and Kaeya raises an eyebrow at him.

“Does he need one? Would that make it better in your eyes?” 

“No, I’m just–curious, I guess,” he gives back and decides to ignore the uneasy rolling of his stomach.

“I didn’t think to ask, to be honest,” Kaeya explains. “But it doesn’t matter if they do have a reason.”

That almost makes it sound as if–”Has this happened to you before?”

Albedo tilts his head as he watches how Kaeya rubs a hand over his mouth. He seems uneasy with the topic and Albedo simply wants to understand.

“There are people with kameras, sometimes.” Kaeya doesn’t sound too happy about it and Albedo almost regrets asking. “Taking pictures wherever they go, and printing them. It’s not–I don’t enjoying knowing that these people have my picture at their home.”

Albedo goes cold at that.

“I see.” Something in his voice must have given him away because Kaeya’s eyes snap to him. “Thank you for lunch.”

He doesn’t bother to lie that he has to get back to work, he simply gets up and leaves Kaeya right there at the table. It’s not the nicest thing he has ever done and he’s sure that Kaeya will have questions later, but right now Albedo needs to leave.

His feet don’t carry him back to his workshop, but bring him home instead and that somehow makes it even worse.

Because this is where he keeps all of the sketches he made of Kaeya.

Albedo has a habit of drawing whatever or whoever catches his attention at any given moment and he never thought this to be a problem. Usually he gives the sketches away, anyway and people have thanked him for it but not Kaeya’s.

Sketches of Kaeya he hordes at home like a jealous dragon, hidden away for everyone but him. And clearly betraying Kaeya’s trust in him in the process.

His stomach lurches as he thinks back to the anger in Kaeya’s voice as he talked about the guy, the disgusted way with which he threw the sketch on the table and Albedo’s hands tremble.

He wonders if his lack of understanding of human custom will be enough to explain his faux-pas away and a moment later he chides himself for thinking only about himself when he so clearly violated Kaeya’s boundaries, however unwittingly it might have been.

He’ll have to apologize. He’ll have to compile all the sketches and hand them over to Kaeya and hope that it will be enough. 

There’s a painful feeling in his chest when he imagines Kaeya looking at him with that much anger and it’s almost enough to make him discard his plan. 

But Albedo knows he can’t do that.

He made Kaeya believe they are friends, and he has to own up to his mistake.

Just–maybe not today. Or tomorrow.

He’ll get his feelings back under control first, and then, when he feels settled again, he’ll talk to Kaeya.

And until then he’ll simply have to avoid him.

~*~*~

Albedo manages three days before Kaeya ambushes him in his own home.

He should have expected it, really; a change of habit is always something noteworthy, Kaeya has explained that to him more than once, but still. Albedo thought he had more time.

Shame licks up his spine as Kaeya looks at him and he is no closer than he was three days ago to figuring out how he is going to explain this to Kaeya.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” Kaeya drawls out, clearly trying for disinterested as he lounges on Albedo’s couch and he’s not even going to ask how he got in. “There are only ever two reasons for people avoiding me. One,” he holds up a finger and fixes Albedo with his gaze. “I deliberately did something that made them want to avoid me. Two, they are trying to hide something from me.”

“Kaeya,” Albedo starts but of course he doesn’t get very far.

“I know I didn’t do the first one, so that means you’re hiding something from me. And I find that I dislike that.”

He’s going to dislike what Albedo is going to tell him in a second a great deal more but instead of saying that Albedo says “Wait here,” before he leaves to get the compiled sketches.

The folder is much thicker than even Albedo is comfortable with and it doesn’t help that he apparently sketches Kaeya in all kinds of situations and even from memory. He even sat down to paint him on canvas once and Albedo will have to retrieve that painting after their talk.

Kaeya is still sitting right there on the couch when Albedo gets back and the confusion is clearly written on his face when he notices the folder in Albedo’s hands.

“I have a confession to make,” Albedo says and hands Kaeya the compiled artworks. “And I need to apologise.”

Kaeya’s face twitches at that but he takes the folder and he doesn’t hesitate to flip through the sketches. He doesn’t look at all of them–Albedo is ashamed to admit that there are way too many for that–but he must get the gist of the situation.

“What’s the confession?” Kaeya still asks, lingering on a sketch of himself, staring off into the distance with a small smile on his face.

He had actually been watching Klee that day, but Albedo hadn’t bothered to capture that as well.

“I’ve been drawing you,” Albedo says and doesn’t quite understand the look of disappointment that flits over Kaeya’s face. “A lot, as you can see. And I have to apologise for that. I never thought to stop and think how that must make you feel and I can assure you that it will not happen ever again.”

It will be hard for him, because sketching Kaeya is something he does to keep his fingers occupied when his mind wanders and it will be a difficult habit to break.

But he knows that he must, if he ever wants to call Kaeya his friend again.

“Where is this–ah,” Kaeya trails off and closes the folder. “The guy during lunch.”

“You were angry. Angrier than I have ever seen you outside of threats to your loved ones and it was clear his stare had made you uncomfortable. I failed to realize how I must have made you feel. And I truly can’t apologize enough for it.”

Kaeya puts the folder to the side before he crosses his legs and leans back against the couch. 

“You think your gaze makes me uncomfortable.”

It’s not a question but it makes even less sense as a statement and so Albedo has to ask for clarification.

“Doesn’t it?”

“Your gaze is–familiar,” he says and Albedo gets the distinct impression that it’s not quite what he was going for. 

“So that’s why you’ve never noticed,” he mutters and he guesses it must make sense. 

“Oh, I’ve noticed,” Kaeya gives back and just like that, Albedo is at a loss again.

“But you’ve never said something! Why would you not say something when it makes you uncomfortable?”

“I never said your gaze makes me uncomfortable, though,” Kaeya says and leans forward, pinning Albedo with his gaze. “You’re so smart. Draw some conclusions from that.”

Albedo finds it hard to think with Kaeya looking at him like that and so he turns around. 

“There’s still a painting I need to get,” he mutters and almost flees his own living-room. He can feel Kaeya’s gaze follow him all the time and while the knowledge that Kaeya is watching him makes his stomach turn it also feels strangely–comforting. Familiar, just like Kaeya said, though it's not quite fitting.

Albedo doesn’t immediately make for his drawing room, because he feels unsteady enough on his legs that he has to lean against the wall and take a few deep breaths first and he takes that time to mull over Kaeya’s words.

He wasn’t upset over the sketches or Albedo’s confession. He knows Albedo has been watching him. He was visibly upset that the other guy watched him.

It’s not a lot to go on, but Albedo is still reasonably sure that the correct conclusion is that Kaeya doesn’t mind it because it’s him.

That Albedo is special somehow.

The thought makes his cheeks go hot and Albedo wasn’t even aware they could do that. 

There is one other thing that bothers him though, and that is the look of disappointment that so briefly passed over Kaeya’s face. Albedo thinks about that, and the fact that he even has a folder as thick as he does with nothing but pictures of Kaeya and the funny way his chest and stomach sometimes feel when he is together with Kaeya. All of that brings him to the realization that maybe there’s not only something to learn about Kaeya, but about himself as well.

And if Albedo is right about this then–

He pushes himself off the wall and marches right back into the living-room.

“Where’s my painting?” Kaeya asks and the casual possessiveness of his words makes Albedo tremble.

“I have another confession to make,” he declares and going by the satisfied smirk on Kaeya’s face he knows exactly where this is going. And he’s not doing anything to stop Albedo and he’s not leaving either and that tells Albedo all he needs to know.

It makes it easier to say it, knowing Kaeya will not break his heart.

“I’m in love with you.”

It feels strange to say, because Albedo has never given much thought to feelings like love, but it also feels right in a way he can hardly put into words.

“Took you long enough,” Kaeya mutters under his breath and then gets up to pull Albedo into a hug. 

Albedo freezes for a moment, not quite used to this much physical contact but when Kaeya simply holds him, he eventually melts into the embrace.

“In case you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m in love with you, too,” Albedo hears him mumble into his hair and even though Albedo had figured it out, it’s still more than nice to hear it as well.

“Is this blanket permission to draw you whenever I feel like it?” Albedo can’t help but to ask when his eyes fall on the folder on the couch and he feels Kaeya chuckle.

“You already had that, sunshine,” Kaeya gives back, pressing a kiss to Albedo’s hair.

It puts the tiny nagging voice in Albedo’s mind to rest and he presses closer to Kaeya in answer. 

Albedo can already tell that his previous aversion to physical contact might change but he’s pretty sure that one thing is not going to change.

How often he draws Kaeya.

He’ll probably need another folder and he might even take Kaeya to buy it. Now that he's sure that he won't mind this at all.

[fangirlandtheories]

Today's been kind of rough day, so I decided, dear followers, to bother you all with it, because my heart is terribly heavy tonight and I really need a rant. I understand if it's something you don't want to read so if that's the case, scroll on.

I just sometimes feel like no one cares about anything that I care about. Goodness that feels like a silly feeling, especially when I'm gifted with people who dedicate time out of their days to send me such kind messages of love, but life outside the internet is and always has been a little different and a little more lonely for me. I'm the youngest of 4 so I always had an older sibling to play with or to keep an eye on me until I was about 9, then they were too big to want to play pretend or want to hang out with me so I'd just play alone. I didn't ever really realize that it was something that would follow me forever. I'm 23 now, not a 9 year old kid that's sad that no one wants to jump on the trampoline with, but that fear of rejection lingers so deeply. Whenever I get excited about things and people look at me like I'm insane, I feel stupid that I ever thought I could let someone else in to that part of myself, when it's just been me for the last 14 years. It's so fucking overwhelming sometimes. My sister came over tonight and I feel like every time she's over, if I even try to speak it's either ignored, dismissed, or spoken over. I'll say something like "Oh I had this one lady come in to work today-" and they will just start a conversation halfway through my sentence. No one even bats an eye, it's like it's normal to do it. Someone could say "How was work?" And I'll be like telling them a funny story and they'll just stare at their phones and nod with an occasional hum of acknowledgment but they don't actually listen, I know because I'll ask them something and they won't respond and I'll ask again and they'll be like "Oh sorry what? I was distracted" and nothing feels so soul crushing as getting through a story only to find that no one was listening, like nothing you say has any value. To find out that you're fucking background noise. Everyone looks at my interests as something funny or odd because they don't share them, to a point where I am protective about them. I came out as bisexual to my family this year, a secret for about 5 years but not one I expected to reveal so soon, and they were very supportive and I'm so lucky for that. I've been a fanfiction writer for 11 years and they have never known. I revealed my sexuality, not that it was something I was ashamed of, but it feels like a secret with more weight, before I ever revealed a hobby. I'm so scared that if they do find out, it'll be something for them to make fun of until the joy is gone. It's an escape but it's all I have. I know people in my life care about me, I really do, but sometimes it really hits me how overwhelmingly lonely I am sometimes. If you have read this far, that tells me that you either love to read this shit or you just enjoy my posts and are intrigued by this long ass post. If you hate it, please don't tell me. I hate it too. I already have thought of every criticism you could use, so save your breath and let me pretend this app is my diary for one fucking second between my stranger things reblogs. I'm okay, I promise, I just needed space to vent.

[van-skmugen]

🛹My socials networks🛹

You can reupload my art as long as you ask me first to know and it isn't published in that social network by me. (In which case I encourage you to reblog it [Tumblr], share it via stories [Instagram] or repost it [BlueSky/X] from my post.) Also that isn't with secondary intentions so much as hate to any character shown or commercial use. Although if you do it without asking me for whatever reason, at least be nice person and share a link to my social networks or credit me, thanks. And credits to the artist (or whatever you found) it isn't a credit, btw. NO SELL, NO USE MY ART FOR A//I, AS NF//T OR SIMILAR, THANKS. IF YOU DO IT , YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS AND ANY CONSEQUENCES ARISING FROM THEM. PRINT FOR PERSONAL USE IS FINE. (just read it without this "//" it's to prevent it from appearing in search engine of this site)

I make a Patreon and Ko-Fi, for future commisions and for anyone who wants to support me have some advantages, which may gradually increase as my skills improve (Patreon).

🛹 Patreon

🛹 Ko-Fi

Here you can found my art (of all kinds like drawings, fanarts, OCs, edits, experimental 3D renders, etc...) and my rants/analysis/writings of media I consume.

🛹Mainly here you can found OCs content, SK8 the Infinity, and Kingdom Hearts, my three passions🛹

🐺🦊 About OCs, I enjoy Original Characters a lot and have my ones that shared story with @skate-loveagain ones since are from a stories written by us, maybe at the beginning I don't post much of them since we're building their stories and world but when we had everything well ordered it's very sure that I will draw a lot of them too. Said that, our Original Characters are morally gray characters, aren't labeled as either "good" or "bad" characters, they're just humans/supernatural beings that make mistakes, either because of past they've had, how they've been raised, circumstances around them or their personal/mental situations to give a few examples. That is, they will only be "good" or "bad" for other characters around them, who will see them in one way or another depending on their points of view. If that makes you feel uncomfortable you can stop following me, and block me if you wish. 🦊Our OCs The Great deities of northeast🐺: Story made by me and my dear friend Lea, that we're doing in comic version and soon we will start publishing surely in Webtoon and Tapas.

🛹 About SK8 the Infinity, especially of Ainosuke Shindo/ADAM, Tadashi Kikuchi/Snake, Kaoru Sakurayashiki/Cherry blossom and Kojiro Nanjo/Joe as their own characters and secondly their ships/dynamics [I like them all at same level] As ships mainly as 🐍🌹🐶 (TRUE EDEN) and 🐯🌸🐯 (SOLE CILIEGIO) [Tho if you don't like something I like, it will always be tagged, so you can mute it and enjoy only what we share (Example: You don't like any of 🐯🌸's combination with 🐍🌹🐶, I will always keep it tagged and this way I've it all well sorted and easy to access for me and easy to avoid by muting it for you)], obviously you will also see content from the others (🌺, ❄, 🌷, 🐱) and from Renga (❄🌺❄)/Shadoka (🌷🔧🌷) ships, but not as often as you will see content from the other four.)

I don't interact with things that don't like if you want to know what things don't interest me you just have to scroll to my likes to see, you can snoop as much as you want, that's why are public. Everything you'll find there will give you an idea, the things I don't like are already muted for me. I don't mind other people's likes/loves, so I have no problem with interacting with the likes/loves we do share. 💞 But I will block you if I see you hate and encourage hatred of one of eight since SK8 is about 8 characters, not 2, 4, 5 or 6. Also, my English isn't professional so I usually block if read jokes or memes that don't understand and think it's hate character, if you think I've blocked you by mistake, try to contact via any other social media with me and I'll unblock you without problem. If you hate any of 8, you can feel free to block me, tho you can say me before so I can block you back, thank you.

It's not my first time on Tumblr, but my first time in the SK8 the Infinity fandom on Tumblr.

❤💙 About Kingdom Hearts I love and have enjoyed it since I was a child, my passion for the series is huge. I love all characters tho mainly you will see content of Sora, Riku and Soriku.

All of the above doesn't mean that I also love and will may publish drawings or thoughts about other animes, videogames, books, series and movies that you'll see from time to time around here, tho not as consistently as those previously mentioned.

Hope we can be mutuals and share our same loves.

Hashtags: #my art, #VanSKmugenArt, #my wips (works in progress), #original character, #fanart, #ramblings, #analysis, #reblog (when reblog posts of others) and #usersname (so you can easily find all reblogs I've done of a specific user), #van-skmugen (for all my original posts [not my self reblogged posts]). Regarding posts/reblogs of ships and/or characters I use the usual hashtags of ships/characters and in special I add #TRUE EDEN for TadaAi (in addition to their usual ship's names) and #SOLE CILIEGIO for Matchablossom (in addition to their usual ship's names).

I have a Sims Tumblr (Simblr), feel free to ask me if you want to follow me there. I usually post Custom Content and also story/images of my OCs and SK8/KH characters.

[aj-moment]

So in case you weren't aware, Overwatch 2 is about to come out, and Overwatch 1's servers are down for matinence ATM (though they will be going back up soon? IDK I don't really follow it). A lot of people are saying it's a dead game now, and rightfully so.

Now Overwatch is an easy target. An incredibly easy one. Blizzard being blizzard, the obvious brownie points forced diversity, and just general cringe corporate bullshit plastered all over it. But I played it religiously for a year or so in 8th grade (I was a 13 year old white boy I was basically obligated to), so in this reminder of the errors of my youth, I want to reminisce a little on overwatch. Think to myself, maybe the game is actually good and HAHAHAHAHA no. It's not. This is a rant about why overwatch is terrible from someone who consistently played it when I was a kid.

It's not even remotely an exaggeration to say that overwatch was the single most miserable casual experience I have ever had the misfortune of subjecting myself too. The biggest offender here is by far the balance patches. If you're not aware, after about a year or so of its life (around when I started playing) Overwatch started hyperfocussing on its esports scene. And what this lead to is a huge influx of patches that probably made the game more balanced, but failed to take into account that some people actually wanted to have fun with the game. And these weren't just small changes either, there's a reason like half of all overwatch channels were entirely dedicated to patch notes. It was a regular occurrence for a patch to just, massively change how an entire character works on a fundamental level overnight. By far the worst of these changes was when they basically took away roadhog's one shot potential in favor of making him fit into the dive meta at the time more (which actually made him worse ironically) when the one shots were literally the entire reason to play as him. They just made the character more generic, and straight up less fun so he could potentially be "meta." And it just straight up sucks when your favorite character suddenly plays nothing like they used to. That was actually exactly the tipping point for me, when my most played character, Mercy, got massively reworked, and even though she got better (actually broke the game and was stupid OP from what I know), the fact that I just didn't have the same character I had always played anymore, she was removed from the game in favor of this better version essentially, sucked massively and was the reason I stopped playing.

Then there's the ranking system. Dear God. So most online games have some sort of rank they give you as a general idea of how good you are. I'm sure I don't need to explain this to anyone with any experience with online multilayer games. And just like the balance patches, the ranking system of overwatch focuses on the top like, 5% of players who are super dedicated to the game, and leaves the casual players with a frustrating an unsatisfying experience in almost every way. How it worked is first, you played 10 placement matches which would determine your rank. That part was fair. Now when I did my placement matches, I was really bad at the game. I ended up being put in the lowest rank (bronze) which iirc consisted of less than 10% of the player base. So I was at the literal bottom of the barrel. After playing a few matches in ranked and doing poorly in general, I decided I wasn't ready yet and went back to free play to hopefully improve, which i did. And eventually, I decided to go back to ranked. Well, the ranked mode works on a season model, and it had been several seasons since I played ranked iirc, and what that meant was I had 10 more placement matches to get through because rank resets every season. But, it's not a true reset. Your rank one season is based on your rank from the last seasons, including the placement matches. Now on this second set of placement matches I did really well. I had improved a lot, it'd been a few months, and I ended up winning almost all of them, 8 or 9 to be specific. And all of that? Across 10 games doing really well, and essentially proving I wasn't in the bottom of the pack anymore? That earned me almost exactly 100 rank points. The average you get for winning a game is about 50. All those placement matches did was put me right back where I was before when i lost almost every match. And the games weren't short either, completing all 10 took a good 2-3 hours iirc, so all that time I spent on it? It did absolutely nothing. Had I just kept my rank from previous seasons I would be gained around 4x as many rank points as I did in the placement matches. All it did for me as a casual player was waste my time. And I don't think I ever touched the normal game modes ever again after that point.

I say normal game modes for a reason though, because there was actually something I enjoyed about the game, and even to this day I'll defend. The arcade. The arcade was where all the wacky shit went. The stuff that would never be a good idea for normal gameplay. Especially where I spent time in the game was thr custom battles, where you could turn everything up to 11 and have the most chaotic game ever. This was the only reason I ever player for more than like 2-3 months. Because this was the only part of the game that was actually fun, and not some tryhard bait marketable esports monolith. And that honestly just says a lot about what the actual game overwatch is like. The only reason I enjoyed the game was because it let you play in ways they never intended you to.

I don't think anyone who follows me would be even remotely interested in overwatch, but if you are, just don't. Any joy you can potentially squeeze out of it will be gone in no time. The game is designed in a fundamentally anti-fun way. Just play splatoon and move on with your life.

[ddarker-dreams]

FINALLY SOMEONE SAID THE TRUTH.

I admit that i enjoyed act 3 but it feels like really rushed i have so much complain with that.

The build up until act 2 was so good it give us so much premise but the final blow si meh. Sorry that i want to share thing long rant with you

1. Why the final talk is with yae, no offense to her but we need ei to explain not to mention she witness khaenriah downfall so she can give us more information, i feel like they do it for the plot armor so they can just keep dragging this

2. So many things that quite inconsistant, the shogun is show no mercy to anyone that even did a little thing outside what she think its right, how come she can still have a talk with signora, when sara is falling like that, and also there is no clarification about sara right now.

The traveler was so done at first they refuse to help thoma and ayaka at the beginning. But they seem so happy and forget everything how come they are not RAGE ( okay maybe this is to bias and personal) when this nation provide nothing about our siblings information and also why they are not mention anything about their problem in ei stroy quest. Its nonsense! She is right in front of youu, ask about your siblings, ask about khaenriah, ask about ukmown god!!. How come they can just forget like that. Also mihoyo really waste the potential about twin things i thing ei will give us so much help bcs of the sympathy that we both rn lost our twin but noooo.

3. Kokomi seem lost some brain cell, she make a very succesfull grand intro but she become meh in act 3, how come a great strategist like her let the sus sponsorship slip just bcs they are desperate, not to mention her screen time is really small and her role seem so unsignificant and it feels lile she is a plain npc.

4. The awesome world quest that we have done doesnt get any mention at all! Inazuma owe us so much with cleansing sakura, thunder sakura, tatarigami, obarashi quest. It has so much potential that yae or ei or anyone else aknowledge what traveler has been done but nooo.

cracks knuckles... i suppose it's time for my promised dissertation. interestingly enough, you touched on a lot of the main issues i had with chapter III.

i think that if i had to pin the main issue, it's a lack of overall cohesiveness? we were jumping all over the place without the chance to ever flesh things out. inazuma is a smaller cast, but i feel like we didn't get to see any of them shine. since i'm most interested in the genshin characters, i'll break down my problems by going over everyone and their (lack) of impact on the story.

was ayaka not questioned or placed under suspicion for being close to thoma before his escape? i wanted to see her broken up over her duties as they relate to the yashiro commission, paired with having someone she genuinely cares about in danger. it would've been an interesting struggle if she was forced to choose one or the other. instead she just kinda took a back seat.

speaking of thoma, i don't even have anything to say, because he just... was there? for .0001 seconds. said "lol this sucks ig" and that's about it. i know we're going to get a story for him in the future since he's a 5* but i'm not getting my hopes up 😭 then in the raiden shogun's character story, man is peachy keen! be upset with the raiden shogun! have some inner conflict! even if it's just using loaded language because he's under surveillance for going against the raiden shogun, that'd be so cool. saying something like,

"Traveler, what's with that expression? Oh please, there's nothing to worry about. We're under the Statue of the Omnipresent God's protection. Nothing bad has ever happened here." *wink*

i also don't know what to say about gorou. he was... there....... i think. what is he fighting for? what are the stakes for him? what makes him place so much trust into kokomi? i'm out of things to say about him because i don't remember anything he did or said.

kokomi... oh kokomi... i was so hyped. so excited. i thought that maybe we could see a foil to the raiden shogun. that she'd have a moment where she's forced to realize, just like her opponent, sacrifices must be made that will hurt people who will never understand why she made them. or maybe something to show her military prowess. but instead she just accepts a mysterious patron's help (?), sees her people aging like the grateful dead from JJBA, and goes oh well. that sucks. what can ya do. oh bye traveler i guess, good luck with that. ????????????? HUH... similar case to thoma where she's gonna get a character story but like. she won't be the leader of the resistance anymore. that was her whole shtick. they took her shtick away. also she forced me to interact with more NPCs whose names i've already forgotten so i'm tilted about that still.

KUJOU SARA... AN INJUSTICE. A DISGRACE. a slap to my woman loving face. the build up was there. yae miko's comments about sara probably knowing the tenryou commission is involved in shady dealings, but is choosing not to think about it. sara being forced to confront reality and challenge her adopted father with the truth. being able to blaze a new path for herself in the process. when she started running to the raiden shogun i was ultra hyped up. sara, a devotee to the shogun for so long, was about to see her god interacting with the same people who led inazuma to this awful state. how would she react? would she stay ignorant, like yae miko so coyly said, choosing to look away in favor of following her god's footsteps? or would she be forced to recognize the raiden shogun isn't as divine as she once thought, and challenge her belief system?

we open the door to see the raiden shogun. the loading screen ensues. the camera pans to the ominous room, clouded in darkness, hinting at the ominous confrontation that is to come. the music takes a serious timbre. and then...

well fuck that potential character arc i guess. (we still don't know what sara made of any of this since she poofed out of existence from the story at this point)

kazuha also was handed a similar treatment. we've been with him for a while longer now. he is our introduction into inazuma, the one who first gets us emotionally involved by regaling us with the bittersweet tale of friendship that led him to becoming a wanted criminal. a kind soul who loves nature yet was dealt a cruel hand by fate, forced to watch his home nation turn into a hostile place, where his dear friend ultimately perished as a result. we get the scene with his friend's vision lighting back up. he parries a block from the raiden shogun, in the same area where his friend was killed by her. the parallels. the drama. except this time, he wasn't too late. he protected the traveler where he "failed" to protect his friend in the past. did he feel redemption at this? or was it a bittersweet reminder of what could've been?

WELL i guess we'll never know because we didn't get to talk to him again 😭 idk who got a bait and switch worse, him or sara. jesus christ mihoyo.

then we have signora. why is the raiden shogun talking to her? does she know about the gnosis being taken, and if she doesn't, what was her plan to get it from the archon? what does she think about scaramouche? and oh, okay, we're fighting here now. good fight + god tier music. pog pog. okay, now we've beaten her up, and raiden shogun wyd— wait no not signora her lore is still on CUPS not YET raiden shogun and— ah she's dead. okay. non nerds who didn't read artifact lore are going to know nothing about her. signora has such an interesting story, and yet... well. ok.

then we get raiden shogun redemption (?) arc. i was hype for this as well, though at that point, idk why i bothered being hype. i knew they were gonna do a cute power of friendship something or another, and i'm good with that, so long as it's executed well. what i was envisioning was like seven different buffs to correspond with the seven different visions, the dreams of those whose ambitions were stolen serving as the spear to penetrate the raiden shogun's heart of stone. maybe a hydro vision giving us extra healing for a time, with the voice acting over it being like,

"Even if the rest of the world forgets us, let our will carry you through this one final time. Succeed where we couldn't, Traveler."

so on and so forth.

but instead we got— you get the idea at this point. why bother spelling it out anymore.

at that point i was surprised the raiden shogun didn't go "oopsie woopsie!! we made a fucky wucky!!!" because that was the vibe i was getting. i love ei, don't get me wrong, but i wanted to see her challenged with what she had done to inazuma in the past year. maybe meeting NPC #2345259 who lost her sister to the vision decree or something, reminding ei of the love she held for her sister... being forced to come to terms with the extent of what she's done in pursuit of eternity.

anyway. please for the love of god mihoyo hire better writers for the main story. that is all i ask. thank you.

[aceofspadegrass]

Good Old Drama and Gossip

Characters: Hatter, Niragi Suguru, Morizono Aguni (Mentioned), Chishiya Shuntaro (mentioned), Last Boss (Briefly Mentioned), and me

Genre: Crack. This time it's just blind!Niragi being fussy and me stealing Aguni in the background

1.5k words

Part 3 of being a little shit to Hatter and getting away with it. But hey, at least there's the added bonus of Niragi being dramatic while being able to see nothing. A shame I didn't arm him with a cane and let him smack people.

Hatter was going to get them this time, he swears on it. It’s been more than a week since they last struck, and as far as he knew, there was not a single invasion into his Beach. He was always on alert, just in case something happened. It didn’t get in the way of his primary duty to his people, but the thought never left him to make sure everything he owned was in place.

Checking for any of the other’s stuff wasn’t anything Hatter worried about, thankfully. For some odd reason he could only interpret as ‘being too handsome and irresistible for his own good’ only his stuff was ever snatched like a cookie in the elusive cookie jar. He didn’t want to develop more stress lines making sure his men were okay in their personal possessions. Wrinkles shall only come to accentuate him, make him look good, not just tired and old.

That privilege can go to Aguni.

The man in question was at the very least rocking it, made him look fierce. Hatter could appreciate that in him, and it makes his job easier in subduing the more…. rambunctious of their group.

In fact, one of Aguni’s more problematic men, Niragi, had come back to a game with bad eye issues, even more worse than the appointed med staff could figure out. Apparently the game the oversaturated oil stain was in broke his eyes to the point where he couldn’t use them for a good while. In short, Niragi was left completely blind, and Aguni now had to deal with an increasingly whiny and temper hearty baked bean burrito. Hatter found it funny, but oh boy was it wearing out his poor fried dumpling.

It also left quite a hole in the defense for the intruders, so the issue of Aguni and Niragi was also an issue for the safety of the Beach (and Hatter’s stuff) as a whole.

No point thinking about this now. Hatter leans back on the sofa, sipping at a cold blend of juices and relaxing. His feet were killing him right about now, Hatter flexing his stiff toes and internally begging for a good pedicure to fly in through the doors and give his feet a touch of heaven and bliss.

The door in fact does fly open as the thought passes his head, Hatter sitting up and raising an eyebrow as Niragi stands there, breathing heavily. The sunglasses Hatter has so graciously offered to him in order to make him both sexier and protect his eyes from the sunlight so he didn’t permanently damage them further was slipping slightly off his face, Niragi fixing them after a few more pants.

“ You…..! You fucking coconut slut!” Niragi rasps out, and Hatter quirks his eyebrow in mild amusement, leaning forward and sipping his juice quietly as one arm rested on his knee. Niragi points a finger in Hatter’s direction, if Hatter was 45 degrees to the left and standing. “ You fucking left me tied on that bed for an hour! What fucking gives!”

Hatter says nothing, as Niragi storms in….. and immediately slams into the back of the other couch, Hatter bursting into laughter. Niragi on the other hand starts spouting obscenities and kicks the couch, and the red cocktail man notices the lack of real gun in Niragi’s possession, other than the super soaker that was substituted. Aguni probably replaced it, knowing that a blind trigger happy man was a danger to society and himself.

“ What the fuck is this bull?! What- Oh for fucks sakes this isn’t Chishiya’s room is it.” Niragi finally sputters out, grabbing the top edge of the couch and massaging the soft cushions underneath his long fingers.

“ Oh, I wish I was. Now what was this about being tied to a bed, hm?” Hatter croons, which earns him a hearty middle finger.

“ Like heck am I about to tell you. Okay, let’s try this again-“ Niragi turns around, but Hatter whistles at him, Niragi slowly spinning back around to face Hatter’s general position. “ What is it, I don’t have all day lobster man.”

“ Aww, not even a minute? Well, it’s just a question. Aren’t you supposed to be accompanied until you regain your senses? After all, you have nothing to guide your way.”

“ Fuck that, I don’t know where Last Boss went and he won’t fucking speak up if he’s just been following me like a sneaky little bitch this entire time, and Aguni was called away for something!”

“ Oh?” Hatter leans back again, Niragi throwing his arms up in the air as he starts pacing and nearly running into stuff again.

“ Yeah! So then that tiny mozzarella cheese ball came and said he’d help because I just look sad and stupid wandering around by myself, which I don’t believe because I know he’d push me into the pool the first chance he got, and then suddenly I’m tied to a bed as he puts on a podcast of nothing but some random guy talking about wool! It was hell!”

“ Oooh, I see. How bad was it?”

“ Fucking terrible! I did not need a wool lecture, thank you very little! Who the fuck wants to know the fastest record to shear a sheep was 39 seconds!? Not me, that’s for fucking sure!” Niragi rants, Hatter nodding and grinning as he switches his juice out for the good wine he kept by his foot the entire time, pouring himself a decent amount and taking a slow sip as Niragi continued to rant onwards. At some point Niragi managed to find the couch again (because he stubbed his toe into it, leading to an extra twenty seconds of Niragi cursing out Hatter’s poor couch) and sat down, Hatter pushing a wine glass into Niragi’s hand and filling it. Niragi downed it like he was a war orphan waiting for his arm to be donated to the war effort, Hatter lightly tsking him for not savouring it properly.

It wasn’t Aguni or any of the girls, but Hatter could appreciate the gossip as Niragi continued without a filter in his mouth, the rant going from Chishiya’s wool podcast to anything else Niragi had heard in his blind boredom. He was impressed how much information Niragi was willing to dole out just to get his anger settled for the rest of the day, and Hatter was happily sipping away as he absorbed it all.

Finally Niragi had calmed down, just nursing the wine glass that Hatter just filled with chocolate cereal instead, as Niragi refused to drink his wine like it was good wine. It was a shame really, Hatter liked hearing about Niragi’s auditory bubble day.

“ Well wasn’t that cathartic!” Hatter chirped as Niragi mumbled around his glass of chocolate cereal, draped over the entire couch as if he wanted to become the couch lord. Or wanting to be painted like the best model in the world, whatever he wanted.

“ Yeah yeah, whatever.” Niragi tips cereal into his mouth just as the crackle of his walkie-talkie alerts him and Hatter. Niragi doesn’t bother to remove the device from his side, too busy eating his cereal as a voice comes through.

And oh boy, what a voice it was, Hatter tuning into it immediately.

“ ….. Testing, testing! Are you hearing me? Hi hi, it’s me, your local menace~ The one with the robe, remember me? Yeah! Hi, don’t mind me, okay? I’m just gonna….. borrow Mr. Beef Stew with extra beef for a few hours! For personal, very important reasons and definitely not because I got a replica statue of a cute dog stuck in a window and now I can’t get it out. Anyways, bye!” The rest becomes static as it disconnects, Niragi snorting a little as Hatter takes one deep breath.

“ Oh, so that’s how it’s gonna be, huh? Niragi, hand it over to me.”

“ You’re not my boss.” “ Yes, but I’m Aguni’s, so hand it over.”

Niragi grumbles, unclipping the walkie-talkie and tossing it in Hatter’s general direction, Hatter humming and pressing the button on the side.

“ Hello? Are you still there, you rascal?” Hatter leans in, pouring as much honey into his voice to lure them out.

“… Yep, still here! Hi, didn’t think you’d be there too Hatter.” “ Oh, I’m here, and I would like to kindly know where you and your little friends are. As a little house visit~” There was a chuckle on the other end. “ Oh, sorry sorry, but I can’t. We can always come over and visit though, even if it’s for a brief moment!” “ Is that so…. Well, you wound me so, you know!” Hatter puts a hand on his chest. “ For you to not even offer me the same respect, ah it hits me right here that you can’t even trust me~”

“ Sorry! Anyways, gotta go, got things to do, got stuff to move with Aguni, who was nice enough to help us.”

“ At your base? Well, what’s stopping me from asking him for directions later for a surprise visit one of these days, maybe have a meet and greet with my beloved stolen items?”

“ Not anywhere near our base, we’re not that dumb my dear red bean paste~ Don’t worry, we’ll return your man in….. 3-5 business days maybe okay byeeeeeeeee-“ The line goes completely dead, and Hatter stares at the black box.

Those cursed beings, they’ve gone too far. Too far.

[everything-laito]

damn the brain be out here going BRRRRRR here’s the Laito and Cordelia Analysis (with a little bit of Karl sprinkled in) Part III

wow my fingers are freezing but my brain sure isn't! 

aaaanyways, iiiiiit’s trauma time!!! Am I a productive member of society by writing these analyses? No. Do I gain anything by writing them? Kinda, my brain gets exercised and they’re fun to research for. But if you haven’t read the first part or the second part for some reason (I recommend reading them in order), there they are. 

Once again, trigger warnings still apply; mainly about trauma, isolation, etc 

I’m gonna talk about the trauma and effects it had on Laito and to attempt to extrapolate why he is the way he is. I have a lot of examples I want to go over and stuff to talk about, so I think the trauma part is going to be split between two (or maybe three) parts. I also have a little bit to say about Karlheinz.

As always, big ass rant under the cut! 

Section 6: Neuroplasticity and Trauma

Oh???? More science vernacular??? You BET! Ok, neuroplasticity. I know I’ve talked about it on this blog. But, I seriously doubt that there is a madlad who has read all of my analyses (speaking of which, I should update the master list lmao) and I don’t expect anyone to do that LOL! Anyways, this neurological concept is the ability of neurons to adapt to certain circumstances or stimuli by creating new neurological pathways (through synapses). This basically relates to memory and learning. It’s why we don’t stay the same person as we grow and develop. It’s responsible from mindset changes to response to traumatic events. It plays a huge part in trauma, which is why “repressed memories” occur as well. 

Trauma, taken from Psychology Today, is defined as: 

...the experience of severe psychological distress following any terrible or life-threatening event. Sufferers may develop emotional disturbances such as extreme anxiety, anger, sadness, survivor’s guilt, or PTSD.

It’s a basic definition. And although I’d assume people would know what trauma is already, but knowing the lexical definition of something can be good to know before going into it. 

Obviously, Laito has trauma, there’s literally no refuting that. But, the point I’m getting at, is the reason why he is the way he is today is because of neuroplasticity. As previously stated, we are going to assume the DL vampire brain works similarly or the same as a human brain. So, because of the stress put upon the brain (Cordelia’s actions and Laito’s general upbringing in a stress filled household), Laito’s brain was rewired (neuroplasticity). This section doesn’t really have much new information, but I wanted to give a baseline since there’s many people who don’t know what neuroplasticity is.

Laito’s definitely different than what he was as a kid. He still kind of had his smarts, and might have been  but as we’ve deducted from the first part of this series, he might have been groomed. On top of that, the brain is easily moldable when you’re a child (which is why grooming makes sense for Laito’s case), and continues to snip brain cells off and form new connections. 

Section 7: Little intermission about Karlheinz 

I know I haven’t really talked about Karlheinz yet. So this will be the section that I do it in. I know this part is about Laito’s trauma, but it’s so hard to not just weave other characters into it. Nothing is stand-alone, which is why it was so hard for me to plan this out. I was debating about saving this for another analysis, but I feel like it fits. 

I referenced this in Part II, Section 5 of this analysis series. Basically, Karlheinz throws Laito into the dungeon and locks him up. Not Karlheinz personally, but he ordered someone to do it. We don’t explicitly know why, but there’s several implications. A huge one is that it was part of Karlheinz’ experiment. Before Dark Fate, I was like “wait, so did Karl find out about Laito/Cordelia? And got like jealous or was like ‘nah this shit fucked up no thanks’?” I was really scratching my head on that. But in Dark Fate, you find that Karlheinz knew about Cordelia and Laito, and even really wanted it to happen. Which is all sorts of fucked up. This really put Laito in for a loop. Here’s a scene from Dark Fate: 

Laito: That woman always, always believed in Karlheinz. Laito: She believed he married her because he loved her, wanted her. That’s why she was sure that one day... he will give his love only to her.  Laito: But she was tricked. She wasn’t loved from the start... Laito: -And I’m a victim of this unbelievable mistake... That’s how it is. Laito: I was treated as a vent for her feelings. Yui: ...Laito-kun... Laito: I’m sure he knew that something like this will happen... He is a god after all... Laito: I was hoping that... He just overlooked it up until now... Laito: But... I was naive.  Laito: I was only planned a scapegoat. 

God, when I played this, that just freaking struck me to my core. That’s so awful. Ironically... Karlheinz probably has some high level of emotional intelligence. I don’t believe he could be labeled as a sociopath, considering he has this high level understanding of pathos. He’s not god in a sense that he controls everyone individually himself. He’s so good at manipulation that he basically creates fate itself (whether you believe in it or not). He’s generally intelligent and cunning, and it also just helps with the fact that he’s immortal and can time travel. He knows cause and effect by now, and I believe Lost Eden said something about how he’s done so many different “timelines.” 

The definition of a god in a philosophical sense can be broken down into three words: omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. More wicked cool jargon! Yay! Here’s what they mean for extra clarification:

Omniscient: All knowing Omnipresent: All seeing Omnipotent: All doing

Sure Karlheinz doesn’t absolutely know everything, nor can see everything, and he definitely has limits to his power, but he has gained knowledge through living for so many years and time traveling; he has familiars which add to the whole “all seeing” part; and he has a lot of power. So basically, in the most semi-”realistic” sense, it would definitely be the closest being to any kind of god.

Karlheinz is probably the reason why Laito himself has such contempt towards religion, and the existence of a god in general. Sure, the boys are like “that shit’s made up by humans” in general, but it would make sense for Laito himself to have that specific hatred. It makes sense that these vampires would be like “oh that’s made up by humans” when they’ve been around forever and have seen multiple religions come and go. (I’m mainly talking about in DL’s lore case, not starting a religious argument; please don’t take it as such––just to clarify)

Section 8: Isolation

Originally, the previous part was going to be about Laito’s isolation being locked up. However, I went off the rails and it turned into that little intermission. This is going to be a shorter section, but I still wanted to talk about, and it will weave into the next section. 

There is no implications about how long Laito was locked up (and tortured) in the dungeon. There’s also no implications about why he was tortured. But torture and isolation puts such stress on the brain that there’s definitely going to be some kind of outcome if persisting for a good period of time. So let’s take a look at what that does to a person. 

Once again, taking this with a grain of salt. I imagine vampires don’t need to rely on social interaction as much as humans do, considering they live forever. But we don’t know. However, throwing Laito into a state of isolation implies that it would be some type of torture or harsh punishment for a vampire, which therefore implies that social interaction is a necessity for emotional function. It’s just sound, inductive logic. 

So now, as for isolation, I’m using this article as reference. It’s a pretty interesting one to read. Here’s another extensive article as well. Basically isolation can cause:

Depression/anxiety

Immune system deficiencies (basically more likely to get physically ill)

Sleep cycle changes (if put underground or with limited natural light)

Hallucinations

Paranoia

Issues with processing information and more susceptible to persuasion/manipulation

We have no clue if Laito’s experience fits all of these. Also, the second one can be crossed out because vampires in DL can’t get physically sick in the way we can. Also, unsure about the sleep cycle stuff considering they are used to being in the dark. Hallucinations and paranoia can’t be crossed off nor proven. 

Being isolated physically and mentally exhausts the mind, which is why it’s also a way of torture. Laito implies that he was tortured with physical devices, but regardless, it’s still stress on the mind. This type of stress definitely goes along with what was mentioned with neuroplasticity and trauma, which also supports the last bullet point: issues processing information and being more susceptible to persuasion/manipulation. Take this flashback from Maniac Prologue in HDB that I used in Part II section 5 (but here’s even more context):

Laito: ーー Let me go!! Let me out of here! Butler: I can’t, young lord. We’ve received strict orders from your father. I am deeply sorry, but please stay put for a while. Laito: What’s the point in having me chained up in here!? Butler: ーーI am very sorry. Laito: Hahahaha…You stupid old man! Do you think that this will make repent!? How foolish! That demon! Has his brain finally rotten from spending too much time with humans!? ー Cordelia appears Cordelia: ー Oh? Laito: …!? Have you come to save me? Cordelia: Oh dear. Ufufu…I’m sorry Laito, that isn’t it. Laito: Eh? Richter: ー Why are you here? Laito: …That’s my line. Cordelia: Okay, okay. No fighting! More importantly, Richter…Come here. Laito: …!? Cordelia: Nnn…Hey, Laito. You are a good boy. Laito: …!! Cordelia: Right, Laito? Laito: Yeah, that’s right. I’m…I’m a good boy after all.  ーー Besides, I’m the type of person who only get more aroused from this kind of thing.

Although I also use this to support the whole Stockholm syndrome point, this could also be supported with the trauma isolation also holds. His mind is being re-molded into the facade he holds. Also, note the whole “do you think this will make me repent?!” part. Just a very interesting thing. The word “repent” implies that there’s something to feel guilty about or the person knows that what they’ve done is bad. It just goes to show that Laito has some part of guilt or moral compass still in tact. 

You can also argue that this scene was when Laito just got locked up, or he’s been here for a while. Either way, he could have also been socially isolated before this too, just hanging around Cordelia like it’s implied when he was a child. Remember the whole not being in bed 9/10 times when he was a child? Yeah, controlled social isolation. We also rarely see Laito with other characters in his flashbacks. I don’t believe we see him with his brothers in any of his flashbacks from what I can recall; he’s usually with Cordelia. Just implies (to me) that he’s around her a lot. And being locked up is also a more extreme case of that, which would mold the brain even more. 

I know that was a LOT to process and read. I sure hope this still is cohesive for you all. I’m pretty bad at organizing this kind of stuff; it’s a bit difficult since it all just goes together. Which, kudos on the writers of DL, because that’s just good writing. I was going to put something about gaslighting in this part, but that might be too long, so I’m going to make that a separate part or include it in the next part. 

If you have any questions, feel free to just put it in the inbox. I’m planning on making the last part of this series answering all the Laito/Cordelia questions I’ve received, or just general questions pertaining to this analysis in general, whether it be tangential questions or clarifying questions. 

Hope you all are still enjoying this ride as much as I am!  -Corn

[nymph1e]

Okay fuck it, I gotta give in, I gotta watch through Supernatural. AFAIK, it's all on Netflix; at least I saw it on there in passing. Going into this, is there anything I should be aware of? Are there any episodes I should skip, any seasons? Should I start from season 4? I know the basic plot and concept, and I know it's very monster-of-the-week. But aside from me highkey shipping Destiel already, that's all.

Well my first piece of advice would be

but uh, let’s fucking ~GO~

If you’re actually jumping into this hellhole (why why why) don’t start at season 4. It’s tempting, but seasons 1-3 are some of the best shit in the whole show, also having context for Sam and Dean’s characters, and their relationship with the supernatural up to season 4 really highlights how fucking wild the introduction of angels is in the show. it’s basically a complete paradigm shift.

I would recommend you watch seasons 1-5 basically as is, though if you’re in a rush, season three is kinda skippable as long as you read a general synopsis. This is the original arc of the show and it shows. A friend of mine, @sammwinchestersdimples​ has said she’d have been fine if the show had ended there, and I can totally see her point. After season five things start to get... uhhhhh... not as good. THAT BEING SAID some really amazing seasons come later, and you’d get nowhere NEAR the Full Destiel Experience without them. What REALLY sucks is that all the seasons have good moments in them, so even if the seasons are generally bad, they’ll have episodes of GOLD. But fuck it, here’s a season-by-season breakdown.

Season 6 - This is the first... “eh” season. There’s a lot of character choices made in this one that I don’t like. The plot also doesn’t quite seem to know what to do with itself and it has no real main villain... or I guess it has a twist villain? This is also the season where they start chucking in the typical “no homos” you get when a show is queerbaiting, so they can point to the no homo bits and claim the queers are delusional.

Season 7 - The absolute WORST season, imo, is season 7, and it features Cas the least out of all the post season 4 seasons. You can tell the writers genuinely tried to write Cas off here. Not to mention the main plot is completely stupid. HOWEVER this is the season where we get golden things like Cas showing up to Dean’s prayer naked and covered in bees, and the episode where Charlie (best girl) is introduced and Dean subsequently has to flirt with a dude because she, a lesbian, cannot. (Wow so straight, Dean)

Episodes Not To Skip:

6x03 - A good Cas/plot episode (spot the famous destiel quote)

6x04 - A good all-round episode, also Jackles directed it so  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

6x09 - This is one of the Batshit Episodes. Definitely watch.

6x10 - On the one hand, Cas episode. On the other, no homo, megstiel episode. Your choice.

6x11 - Good episode.

6x15 - THE ULTIMATE META EPISODE. Sam and Dean are teleported into Jared Padelecki and Jensen Ackles’ lives on the set of Supernatural and it is so batshit.

6x17 - Jolly good episode, and nice destiel content.

6x18 - Time travel episode, which is always fun.

6x19 - “Baby in a trenchcoat.” ‘Nough said.

6x20 - The Man Who Would Be King is the destiel episode. It is infamous in the fandom, and for good reason. It’s not just a good destiel episode, but one of the best episodes in the series. With banging lines like “Freedom is a length of rope. God wants you to hang yourself with it.” and “For a brief moment, I was me again.”

6x21 & 6x22 - The last two episodes are kind of must-watches after TMWWBK, trust me.

Episodes Not To Skip:

7x01 & 7x02 - follows on from s6 final. You don’t wanna skip.

7x05 - Good general episode

7x06 - Again, good general episode. Sets ups plot for the season.

7x08 - Ugh. So the A plot for this episodes invoves Becky, the insane, stalker, fandom-insert character, roofie Sam into marrying her (and it’s heavily implied they have sex - and it’s treated as a joke despite being LITERAL RAPE). BUT this is the episode where Garth is introduced and Garth is fucking amazing. So. IDEK.

7x10 & 7x11 - Plot important.

7x12 - Time travel episode! See if you can catch the bi!dean moment ;)

7x17 - Cas is back! Or is he???

7x18 - GARTH EPISODE

7x20 - CHARLIE!!!! WATCH THIS EPISODE!!!!

7x21 - Cas episode. It’s... interesting.

7x22 - The tagline for this episode is “Sam and Dean seek out an Alpha” 😭. It’s a Cas episode.

7x23 - If Cas weren’t in this episode I’d say skip it.

Season 8 - A fantastic season. If The Man Who Would Be King is the destiel episode, season 8 is the destiel season. When you watch this, DM me so I can RANT about all the amazing destiel this season. It’s also, again, a great season in general I remember watching it as it was airing it was soooo good. You have the arrival of the Bunker, you have Kevin and Charlie being awesome, some nice sprinkles of batshit episodes, BEST BOY BENNY rocks up in all his glory. Fucking epic season. Only downside it Sam’s character takes a bit of a dive. I’d recommend you watch through all of this season.

Episodes To AVOID:

7x13 - I literally pretend this stupid fucking episode doesn’t exist. Basically Dean impregnates a woman with Super Pregnancy and she has a daughter who becomes an adult within hours and then dies. The end. Everyone hated it. Man fuck this episode. Of course it was written by Buckleming.

Season 9 - Sadly, after how amazing season 8 was, and how spectactularly season 9 was set up, this season is a disappointment. It’s an ok season. It’s not bad, it’s not good, it’s just a bit all over the place.

I was going to give you the normal episode list to not skip, but looking through, most episodes this season should be watched for one reason or another. Either they’re Cas heavy, they do some interesting character building, or they feature one of the awesome side characters like Charlie or Jody.

This season is probably the height of the war in the writers’ room about destiel. Some writers want to no homo the whole thing and back way off, while other writers want to lean into it hard. So in the same season where SPOILER Cas loses his virginity to a random reaper woman and Dean kicks Cas out of the bunker to fend for himself, you also have Cas’ fatal flaw used as propaganda against him by Metatron being that he’s "in love” with humanity Dean. /SPOILER Whatever you do DON’T SKIP THE FINAL FEW EPISODES. TRUST ME.

Season 10 - Haha oh dear. This season is likely the biggest for wasted potential. You saw the end of season 9, right? You go “HOLY SHIT YES LET’S DO THIS” and then they do... season 10. They really became experts at setting up an awesome season only to fuck it up in delivery, right? Again, not a bad season, per se.

Episodes To AVOID:

9x05 - In which Dean wants to fuck a dog. I am not joking. I wish I were. Basically a spell-gone-wrong makes Dean doglike. it’s weird. it’s batshit. Not the good kind.

Season 11 - Season 11 is a pretty good season! They tried to give Dean a female love interest but Jackles said  ✨No✨ and played Dean as brainwashed and uncomfortable the whole time and I love him for it. Of special note this season is the episode Baby (11x04), which is my favourite episode in the series! It’s funny, it’s heartwarming, it’s weirdly shot. I love it! We also get casifer this season which is awesome! Some episodes are skippable, but they’re generally good episodes.

Episodes NOT to Skip (ignore the 10 year special):

10x01 & 10x02 - Great episodes, Dean in this is *chefs kiss*.

10x04 - *sighs* Fan Fiction. A 200th episode that is simultaneously a love letter to fans and laughing in fans’ faces. I’ve never liked this episode for the second-hand embarressment of it all, but you should watch it and see if you like it.

10x06 - Pretty good episode.

10x07 - Jody AND Donna! Fantastic episode!

10x08 - Dadstiel rears his ugly head. I fucking love how Cas adopts two (2) kids over the course of the series and in both cases Dean eventually goes “ah fuck, I guess I gotta co-parent this thing”. Also we get some KILLER destiel this episode. hey go on a DATE and Cas tells Dean he’s a good person ^_^

10x09 - Good episode. Much destiel.

10x10 - Charlie episode!

10x11 - Teen!Dean! Need I say more?

OK so I just had a look, and you really just need to watch every episode from this point in the season on. Enjoy!

Season 12 - Another example of a TERRRIBLE season, is season 12. Season 12 is also one of the most destiel-heavy seasons in the show. You see the issue? Like, it’s got a stupid plot that makes no sense and has no fucking cohesion, but you also FINALLY have the writers going “fuck it” and all in on the destiel. After this point Dean never has another non-Cas love interest and vice versa, they stop giving us whiplash from baiting and no-homoing. IF the conspiracy theory is true, and the end of the show is shit because of executive meddling, this season is the one where the writers decided they were gonna push for destiel endgame.

I gotta tell you the truth, I skipped this season in my rewatch, so all of my memories are from years ago when it first came out. This seson was the last that I watched live (for a reason). Should you skip it? No. But I’m not well informed enough about this season that I can point out what episodes you should or should not watch.

Season 13 - Congratulations! You’ve reached the point where the show’s gotten consistently good again! (just in time for most of the audience to have already left lol). We start off with SPOILERS Dean mourning Cas like he’s lost the will to fucking live. I’m talking complete despondence, praying for Cas to come back, lashing out in anger at everything, one of the darkest points we’ve ever seen him at on the show, then pulling a 180 and being super happy the second Cas comes back. /SPOILERS They also introduce Jack, who is the SECOND child Cas decides to adopt and Dean ends up co-parenting (Sam too). In fact, Jack is explicity Sam, Cas, and Dean’s kid.

Season 14 - Another good one. My only issue is where they decided to take the plot at the end of the season. I’d recommend watching it all, regardless.

Season 15 - And so we’ve come to the end of the line. This season was... well it was actually pretty good. It started off with what we hellers lovingly refer to as the “divorce arc” where Cas and Dean have a big blow up, and Cas leaves, but that ends with Dean praying on his knees for forgiveness and a nice hug. Honestly this season you can cut the tension between the two of them like a knife, and you can tell Misha and Jensen were doing it deliberately.

I’d say watch up until 15x18, then you decide what to do with the last two episodes. If you want you can watch them to understand just why people put their conspiracy theory hats on, or you can send me another ask and I’ll rec you some post 15x18 finale fics! There’s one fic that’s a replacement for 15x20 written in script format that is particularly good.

Anyway that’s it. It’s kind of left me a little sad, to break down the show in this way. Especially coming up to season 15 nd remembering all the wasted potential. Honestly if you do decide to watch the show, good luck. I hope you enjoy it. I’m also glad you never had to be put through the bullshit false hope that came about after 15x18.

[starshine583]

Journal Entry 5

(This entry references New Girl on the Block Chapter 6. enjoy!)

Entry 1 / Entry 4 

Monday, January 21st

What’s that expression Paris has started using? Ladybug’s Luck? I had some of that today. On my way out the school- believe it or not, I was alone -this boy came waltzing up the front steps and asked if I knew Marinette. And who should I find this mystery person’s name to be? Adrien Agreste. Yes, you read that right. Adrien Agreste, the French model who’s been posting an obnoxious amount of ads and posters across Paris. Come to find out, he attended her old school, Dupont. Marinette didn’t tell me that that was the name, but Adrien Agreste has only attended one school. Apparently, she didn’t know that he was visiting her school today, nor did she tell Adrien her new school’s name. She also became extremely distraught when I told her that he’d stopped by. This infers that Adrien is not only the person who’s been following her, but he could very well be the person she’d made those birthday gifts for as well. Luckily, I didn’t tell Agreste that she attended the school. I actually told him that no new students had enrolled since last year. I know that sounds contradictory to my intentions of getting to know Marinette’s personal life, but I can’t investigate her if she decides to transfer schools again, can I? Besides, I find myself rather concerned for her, strange as that may be. Stalking cases can turn quite serious if not contained properly, and Marinette admittedly doesn’t seem the type to deserve to go through such ordeals. Hopefully, Agreste will move onto a new victim once he realizes that there are a ridiculous amount of women who are more than willing to throw themselves at his feet. 

Aside from the Adrien Agreste visit, though, I’ve also learned that Marinette listens to Jagged Stone (It was a tad disappointing, but I suppose I can accept it.) and loves aquariums. When Claude suggested that we go this Saturday, she became so excited that she wiggled in her chair. It was a strange thing to do, but I’m starting to realize that most of the things she does are strange. (To myself, anyway) I need to cut this entry short for the sake of sleep, but I’ll write more as soon as I can.

-

Dear Diary,

I’m totally freaking out! Apparently, Adrien showed up at my school today and asked Felix where to find me! Thankfully, Felix told him that I actually didn’t attend the school, so Adrien left, but still! How did he find out? The name of my school was supposed to be a secret. I asked Maman about it, because Felix said that a girl had told Adrien the name, but Maman didn’t know anything. She actually got really angry and started ranting about charging Adrien with harassment. I managed to talk her down, though. Then we called Mlle. Bustier, because she’s the only one who could have told him, but she also didn’t know anything about it. So how did he know??? Maybe Nathalie looked it up for him? *Sigh* At least Felix didn’t tell him where I was. He’s definitely proving to be someone I can depend on. He even offered to drive me home, isn’t that nice? I think he’s a lot softer than he leads people to believe. But did you know that he hates Jagged Stone? I couldn’t believe it! He even called Jagged’s music “noise”. Noise! It was so rude. I forced him to listen to a song, and he did say it wasn’t that bad. Then I made him give me one of his earbuds to listen to one of his songs, which turned out to be a mistake.. We ended up getting way too close to each other! I ended up stuttering and blushing, and it was so embarrassing. He was good about it and didn’t say anything, but just.. Ugh. Why does he have to be so handsome? Well- not handsome handsome. Just like.. You know.. The usual handsome. The normal type of good looking. Anyway, it was totally weird, but at least I learned that his eyes have little specks of blue in them. It looked pretty neat! 

I think that’s all for today, but I’ll be sure to talk more tomorrow. See ya later, Dear Diary!

[itsclydebitches]

Discredit Pt. 2: More Recommended Reviews For A.Z. Fell’s

Alright, folks. Some notes first: 

1. You all rock. I’m sending out 20k+ virtual hugs for all the notes I NEVER expected to get on this nonsense. 

2. This is probably the final section, just because I’m not sure I can adequately follow up part one and it might be foolish to attempt it here. Let alone twice. But for now, here we go. 

3. Kudos to the anon who reminded me of Aziraphale’s cash-only policy <3 

4. Nicole Y’s review is based off an actual comment I read years ago, but heaven only knows where online it was. I’ve got the memory of a goldfish. 

5. Trigger warning for the use of a queer slur in this. It’s the same review as above, number 5 if you want to avoid it. 

6. There’s a text-only version of just the reviews at the end, after all the images. I’ll upload that to my Sparse Clutter collection on AO3 in a bit. 

Bonus 7. People thinking this is a real shop deserve all the good things in this world. 

That’s all I’ve got. Hope you enjoy! 👍

****************************************************************************

I’m a simple guy who likes simple jokes. If there’s a whoopee cushion I plant it. I will call you up to ask if your refrigerator is running and then tell you to go catch it. (Actually that one died out so thoroughly it’s actually capable of a comeback now!). Yes, I’m a dad and yes, I have a t-shirt that says Dad Jokes? I Think You Mean Rad Jokes! which I wear un-ironically every Saturday. All of which is just to say that my wife was well prepared for my stupidity when I walked into Fell’s.

I? I was not.

You see the bibles when you walk in? The ones to the left? Let them be. Don’t even look at them. Definitely don’t pick out the fanciest one you can find and absolutely don’t walk up to the owner with it held in your pudgy little fingers, grinning like a loon, cheerfully asking whether this should be in the fiction section. Just don’t. Mark my words you’ll regret it. Though your wife won’t. She’ll get a great old laugh out of it all.

In conclusion: it’s quite possible that mama did raise a fool and he just got his ass verbally whooped by a guy in a bowtie.  

***

Shout-out to Mr. Fell for being the only decent bloke in this city. I’ve popped in and out of his store for years—including before I started transitioning. So he knew my dead name, dead look, whole shebang and I was definitely nervous to play the ‘You know me, but this is what’s changed and are you gonna throw a fit about it?’ game.

You know what he said? “Oh, Rose! What a lovely choice. Crowley dear, why aren’t you growing any roses? Some white ones would look splendid next to my Henredon chair.”

That’s it. He just went straight into dragging his partner for not giving him roses. So hey, Mom? Next time you’re snooping through my social media why don’t you explain to all these nice people why the 50+yo book seller accepts me in ways you won’t. Don’t go telling me age is an excuse or that you’re ‘Stuck in your ways.’ I’ve watched Fell dress in the same damn clothes since I was ten!!

Yeah. Sorry. Rant over. Fell’s a gem. That’s my take. Rose out.

***

Anyone else in the shop when that guy started yelling about buying pornography? And then got escorted into the back room for some ‘private conversation’? Well done, Mr. Fell! Didn’t know you had it in you.

***

Alright alright alright alright I am TOTALLY calm about this.

Went into A.Z. Fell’s last Thursday. Not because I knew anything about the place. Just because I’ve been hitting up every bookshop within a twenty-mile radius, asking if they’re hosting any book signings. Long story short I self-published my novel Blight last month—which you can get for a mere £5 here but I swear this isn’t a promotional thing I’m just BROKE—and have been looking for networking opportunities, tips, stuff like that. So the owner listened politely as I explained all this. Then said he didn’t do anything of that sort, which didn’t surprise me given the shop’s vibe.

But then? Then??? He offered to let me do a signing there??????

As said. Totally calm about this. This man either plans to kidnap me or is actually giving me my first shot at an audience outside my blog. AKA totally worth the risk.

Tuesday the 9th. 7:00pm. Just in case anyone’s interested ;)

***

holy sweet baby jesus i was tripping balls last week you tryin’ to tell me that kING KONG SIZED FANGED FUCK SNAKE IS REAL

***

Witnessed the most perfect exchange the other day:

Grumpy Dude With No Manners: “You. Boy. Where’s the man I spoke with over the phone?”

Mr. Fell’s Partner Who Knows Damn Well Only Two of Them Work There But Clearly Doesn’t Like This Guy’s Tone: “Did this man give you his name?”

Grumpy Dude: “Might have. Don’t remember. Sounded like a fairy though.”

Me: “....”

My girlfriend: “....”

This Poor Sweet Startled Kid On Our Left: “?!?!?!?”

Fell’s Partner In The Drollest Voice I’ve Ever Heard: “None of us have wings. Out!”

***

This shop gets full stars simply because every time I walk in they’re playing Queen.

I mean, I’ve walked in once, but once is enough when you’ve got Crazy Little Thing Called Love blasting full volume.

***

Okay, I’m still kind of shaken up but I needed to write this out somewhere and this seemed as good a place as any.

I spilled my latte on a book. Just tripped on thin air, popped the lid, and chucked a venti’s worth of coffee all over a very expensive looking text. I didn’t mean to, obviously, but it happened and I just started bawling on the spot. Full on sobs because this semester has been absolute hell, I ruined this guy’s antique, there’s no way I can pay for it, I can’t even sneak away because I’m drawing the whole store’s attention...just all the things all at once. I really was straight up panicking and was seconds away from pulling out my inhaler. I couldn’t breathe.

And then Mr. Fell showed up.

Jesus it’s embarrassing to admit but I think I hit him once or twice. On the arms I mean, because he was trying to touch me and I figured, I don’t know, it was a restraint or something. He was going to call the police and hold me until they got there. But then he managed to start rubbing my back and I lost it like I hadn’t already been bawling my eyes out in this shop. Ever cry into a perfect stranger’s chest? I have! But if Mr. Fell seemed to mind he definitely didn’t show it. Just kept holding me while I probably ruined his shirt and then took me into the back and made me a new coffee in this cute little angel mug. He let me stay there while I called my sister and waited for her to arrive.

She’s a good twenty minutes outside of Soho, so we talked for a while. It’s not like Mr. Fell could fix my shit roommate or bio classes, but I guess just talking about it all really helped. I was a lot calmer by the time my sis arrived and Mr. Fell insisted I come back any time I wanted—for browsing or more coffee.

Of course, sis offered to pay for the book herself. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone look so surprised in my life. “Certainly not!” he said. “Contrary to popular belief, no one should pay for their mistakes. It’s what makes you all so wonderfully human.”

So yeah. Thanks, Mr. Fell.

***

This little shop must have started a book club for kids! Lately I’ve seen the same group of children hanging out at Fell’s. Three boys and a girl. They’re a bit rambunctious at times, but who isn’t at that age? So wonderful seeing literature passed down to the next generation. Even if some of it is rather questionable looking...

***

It’s an honest crime that more of you aren’t talking about what a wonderful bookstore this is.

I’m a book lover at heart and Fell’s always makes me feel like I’m coming home. I just arrived somewhere safe and familiar after a particularly harrowing day. I’ve slipped under the covers of my bed after dinner and a bubble bath. It’s something like that, but with an element of surprise too. One of the reasons why I adore private and used shops over chain stores is that little touch of chaos. You walk in and sure, there are general sections to browse, but everything is just a little bit disorganized from people leafing through books and then putting them back somewhere else. There’s no real record keeping, you’ve just gotta head to one particular corner and hope for the best. It’s not the sort of place you go to if you want something specific because the chances of them having it are slim—that’s just how the universe works—and even if they did no employee knows where it is anymore.

But if you wander the shelves for a while, crouch down low to get a look at everything on the bottom shelf, pay attention to the books that don’t have easy to read titles or any summaries to speak of... you just might find something you didn’t know you were looking for. That’s Fell’s: the comfort of the familiar and the excitement of the unknown.

*** A lot of people might assume that these stories are embellished or outright made up, but as a bookseller myself going on twenty years I believe every single one of them.

That being said, I accidentally moved a rug and found chalk sigils that look like they belong in a cult. Make of that what you will.

***

There’s a special place in hell for 21st century shop owners that only take cash. Who carries cash anymore? Not me! I haven’t bothered with that nonsense in years! You can get a card reader for 15 pounds on Amazon. Or you know what? Be stingy and pay 7 for the little attachment on your phone. This place is nuts if it thinks it’s going to survive much longer on a cash-only policy, especially with some books that look like they’re worth hundreds or thousands of pounds! Yeah, yeah, just let me pull out this giant wad of bills for you. I’ll carry them around a crime-laden city because there’s no ATM near you either.

I mean jesus, you’d think this guy didn’t want to sell anything.

***

I walked in. There was a man screaming at a fern while another threatened him with an umbrella. I walked out.

5 stars do recommend.

***

I once walked in on the same (?) guy yelling at a book for daring to fall on the owner’s head. I think that’s just a Thing over there.

***

Like a lot of people here I didn’t actually go to Fell’s for any books (flat tire, Angel Recovery taking forever) and ended up staying three hours (not because of Angel). No, I wandered towards the back and found this ancient CRT set propped on a table of books, the kind that my Dad used to watch Twilight Zone on. This lanky guy had a marathon of Gilmore Girls going... though how he was managing that with a broken antenna and no DVR, I really don’t know. But yeah. He told me to pull up a chair and I did. Guy gave me popcorn.

I wish I’d paid a little more attention to his name. Charlie? Curley? I really can’t remember, but thanks for the enjoyable afternoon, man.

***

I BOUGHT A BOOK HERE

Not sure how though. Just kinda happened. First edition of Just William. Frankly I didn’t even want the thing, but the owner basically shoved me out the door with it when I took two seconds to look at the spine. Odd that he was so willing to part with this one.

Update: ... hold up. I didn’t buy a book because I never actually paid the guy. ‘Basically shoved me out the door’ was literal. Do I go back??

***

This page has really gone feral the last couple of months so I’m just gonna bite the bullet and say it:

Anyone notice that Fell’s snake and Fell’s partner are never in the same room together?

***

I really don’t like the implications of this…

***

This is precisely why the Internet has turned into a cesspool. You all should be ashamed of some of the stuff you’re writing here. Can’t two men just be friends anymore? Two real life men? These guys aren’t some characters for you to ‘ship’ or whatever. Quit making outrageous assumptions about their sexualities and use this website for what it’s actually for: reviewing the bookshop. Honestly I’m so sick of this sort of this shit.

***

Dude. They run a queer-focused shop together with a flat on the second floor. Fell calls the guy ‘Dear’ and he’s always calling him ‘Angel.’ People have literally seen them kissing. If you want I can give you the number of my physician. He might be able to help you pull your head out of your ass.

***

What the hell is your problem? I’m literally just reminding people to stop making assumptions. It’s gross and insulting. These guys check their Yelp page. You really think they’re gonna be okay with this stuff?

Also: I’m not the five-year-old relying on insults, so.

***

Making an account purely to set the record straight: I’m the hot twink in question and I married that angel. Peace

[chaoslordjoe]

Bloodlines AU - Tiny Warmths Part 1

The cane clacked against the Schnee Manor's front door. Winter was welcomed by Klein who always showed her to the living room, knowing she needed a rest from the trip back home for the newest addition to the home.

"Long flight, dear?" Willow asked by the staircase, sniffing her coffee.

"More like a long sail, mother. We were inspected for hours by sea/air traffic control." Winter grumbled, walking over to the sofa.

"Yes, I heard about it from the news reports. You'd think they would recognize our snowflake by now."

"I'm not sure I want to test that theory." Before she could sit down, she was welcomed by a hug from her blue-haired brother-in-law.

"Good to see you Winter." 

Winter returned the hug best she could. "You as well, Neptune. How's fatherhood?"

Neptune could only sigh. "Exhausting so far. He's almost five months and I feel like I'm still getting used to all this."

"Weiss certainly wasn't kidding about how anxious you've been." She was handed a spot of tea. "Thank you, Klein." Then she turned back to the spearman. "Is my sister adjusting any better?"

“Surprisingly. But Nicky's been dealing with colic pain, so patience is a virtue she’s been having better than me. She's taken to this so much easier than I have."

Winter sipped at her tea. "It can't be easy with both you and her running businesses."

Neptune sat taking a cup of tea. "It's not, but we've adjusted and tried to settle into a routine. Even when she's at her busiest she refuses to hire nannies and will rock or breastfeed him while on a business call."

Winter tented her fingers. "It's funny. I never really considered how that works until seeing the photos she sent me while I was overseas."

"Pretty much no choice if he’s cranky.” Neptune answered. “He won't take a bottle from Klein. That’s how much he’s already making up his own mind.”

Klein aided Willow on her way to the recliner. "I believe the important part is that I'm trying, sir."

Neptune smiled at the butler. "You are. And we are so thankful for your help, Klein."

Willow sat back down. "He's less fussy when we get him on diaper duty. But clearly..." She grunted, sitting slowly onto the chair. "Clearly he's more in favor of his mom and dad right now."

"How are your back pains, mother?" Winter asked.

"Little stiff today.” Willow answered. “I'm only having one coffee cup for Nicky's sake, due to all the hustle and bustle of preparing for a visit before you arrived."

"Weiss is changing him right now." Neptune pointed out.

Winter exhaled. "Right. Meeting the nephew...How should I present myself?"

"Just be yourself." Neptune said plainly.

"You mean the military woman shtick minus the sternness." She asked.

“That sounds about right.” Weiss Schnee answered right behind her big sister.

Winter turned her head, seeing a joyful Weiss having just gotten off of work for the day with a bundle in her arms. Inside the blue blanket was Dominick Karl Schnee, cocooned and eyeing his mother fondly. Weiss bounced him in the blanket turning him around to face a new relative.

“Dominick, can you say ‘hi’ to your auntie?” His mom requested.

The future heir revealed his little face to Winter.

He weighed in at 8 pounds and 3 ounces in a handsome little bundle of his father’s bronzed skin, light blue eyes included. His mother’s alabaster hair was spiky but neatly groomed in time for being the up and coming prince of his family’s corporation. The baby stared through Winter, moving his tiny arm out and grabbing the edge of his snuggie.

The Specialist took the plunge by reaching out her hand with an adjustment from her cane to let him hold her bigger hand. “Um…Hello, Dominick. I’m your Aunt Winter.” She greeted after a heavy pause.

The baby reached out by placing both hands around Winter’s trigger finger.

She flinched from the sudden grapple. “Is this his way of reading people?”

“I think he’s trying to figure out who you are.” Neptune observed.

Weiss gave a big smile. “Would you like to hold him? You’ll be fine, just be sure to support his head.”

Winter reached out, gently taking her nephew and still appearing uncertain. Unfortunately the toddler disagreed. Who was this mysterious lady who looked almost nothing like mommy? 

Her grasp felt unwelcoming with baby Nick kicking up a fuss. Winter cringed looking up to her sister in a panic.

“Shh-shh-shh, it’s okay honey. Mommy’s here.” Weiss cooed. “Try rocking him a bit.”

She rocked him back and forth. Except this wasn’t the left-and-right direction. This was back and forth, on the couch where things had been static. The boy whimpered from the incorrect rocking, shielding his eyes and curling up.

Weiss frowned. “I'm sorry Winter, he's just not used to you yet" She took back her son, bouncing him again to soothe his cries.

Winter frowned next. “I would know having raised you.” She wanted to comment.

Dominick was suddenly calm being set back down on the couch by Weiss. He curiously eyed the living room around him when Weiss stood up stretching across from her kin. “I’m guessing you were hoping to ask how Neptune is adjusting, sister.”

“The thought crossed my mind back on the tarmac.” Winter replied with a nod.

Neptune could only sag his shoulders. "I'd like to say that I am but then I’d be fooling myself. Last night, Weiss was in a board meeting and I swore I could get Nicky to bed. I don't know what I did wrong but he screamed his head off for almost fifteen minutes until she came to bail me out."

“It was...Troubling.” Klein recalled while he handed his infant master a rattle and chewing ring.

Weiss nodded next. “Took me a little bit to calm him down, taking even longer to bring Neptune back into his usual bouncy self.” She squeezed her husband’s shoulder when he sank further at that recollection.

“I thought he didn’t like me. But can you blame me?” Neptune defended himself. “He always stops crying for you.” He groused.

“He just needs to take some time in getting to know you, dear.” Willow coaxed. “Klein could tell you a thing or two about that.”

The butler folded his arms with a sigh. “I take no joy in being the bearer of bad memories here. But mum is right, seeing as how...He was away at work,” Klein hissed, holding back his grumpy persona. “It took our snowdrops plenty of time to adjust to myself. Until one day they started speaking hand gestures asking where she was.”

“And how does that help Neptune?” Winter asked.

“I am saying is that there must be a moment for you and young Master Dominick to connect, just the two of you. Seems I got lost in translation there, sir.” Klein admitted to the blue-hair.

“Yeah, fair enough.” Nep conceded. “It's hard to settle a baby when there's so much commotion around the manor. And he's so attached to Weiss, that I thought we'd have that instant connection. He's my son but I guess it's just as hard on him as it is on me."

During his rant, Neptune saw Dominick following his dad’s words with a quizzical head tilt. “You like me, right little fella?” He wiggled his tan finger for him to see.

The baby took a moment to look upon his rattle. Then to the ring in his mouth. Take daddy’s hand, his 5-month-old instincts told him. Nick set the rattle down and grabbed Neptune’s finger with both hands, then babbled in an interested tone.

The intellectual laughed. “Yeah I’m your daddy. Can you say ‘daddy’?”

He cooed in D-sounds, but moving onto B-noises as he wasn’t opposed to learning new noises.

Weiss folded her arms proudly. “See? He’s learning.”

Neptune picked the baby up, flashing a goofy grin and holding him proudly. “My boy!”

Nicky squealed happily and joined him in a laugh whilst reaching for his rattle. Nep bent over, handing the rattle to him and holding him to his chest during one of his evening bounces.

Winter gave the slightest hint of a smile at the bonding moment in front of her while going back to her sister. “Among the other things I’m learning to catch up on, the delivery must have given you hell.” She said.

Weiss held onto her own stomach underneath the lovely sweater.

“It was...An experience. A scary one, to be sure. But Neptune ensured I stayed in bed while I was recovering. Minus a few stitches, I’m as defiant as ever. Hopefully.” She blinked slowly while watching her son and hubby in the background.

“How bad was it?” Winter asked while snapping a picture of her nephew’s playtime.

“Klein said I was working too hard” She woefully began. “That’s what brought on the labor. However, Yang was kicking in the door and kept me calm just in time. When the contractions started, I was already aboard Yang’s Manta craft while Ruby and Neptune held onto me during our flight to the hospital.”

Winter patted her sister upon the back.

“Neptune was so panicked, and it took so long that I was wheeled in for an emergency C-section.”

“Did they go through with it?” Winter’s expression turned to that of fear. Hadn’t her sister been stabbed and nearly cut open enough times during the Salem war?

“No. But the labor was quite long.” Weiss finally answered. “While Neptune was panicking outside it was the sisters who were keeping me steady. Before they could break out the knife, Dominick was- -Ahem…” She rubbed her eyes with an itchy throat. “Apologies...Dominick was born safe and sound. So we agreed we were having only one.” Weiss sniffled.

Don’t get her wrong, it was a happy memory. But the pain was more than enough to warrant a single offspring and heir being held in her husband’s arms. Winter dried her bottom eyelid on sisterly muscle memory.

“I’m glad that he’s here.” Winter added. “Thankfully, you’re not feeling the way Blake is right now in her pregnancy.” She mentioned.

“Oh, what have you heard from her?” Weiss lightened up at hearing about her cat teammate.

Winter folded her arms. “Only that she’s feeling stir-crazy. Moving around is quite difficult for her right now. relying on Nora and Ren for their recipes in case of any strange appetites...Though Ruby has contributed some odd ideas."

“That makes Sun at her beck and call.” Weiss guessed.

“Yes, quite.” Winter answered. “You probably don’t want to know what cravings Ruby conjured up for her.”

“Somehow I’m not sure that’d help with Nicky’s colic deal.” Weiss mused, grinning at hearing a joyful squeal behind her with her husband’s starry-eyed reaction. “Oh, mother. You haven’t held him yet.” She offered.

“I bet he’s been looking forward to spending some quality time with his oma.” Willow beamed. She held out her aging arms to her son-in-law. Neptune handed baby Dominick over with the rattle included.

Willow took the rattle and handed it to her grandson, rocking him back and forth with the proudest smile she could bear at 57 years with how he’s already turning out.

“Are you happy to see your Auntie Winter yet, my Little Yeti?” She teased.

Nick cooed after a prompt nose boop from the matriarch.

“Little Yeti?” Winter questioned.

“It’s cute, but I prefer to call him Snowdrop or Nicky.” Weiss admitted, shrugging.

“Yeah, you’re gonna grow up into a big monster and give mommy and daddy the runaround huh?” Neptune baby talked to the...Well, baby.

“Please don’t jinx it, Neptune.” Weiss insisted.

The infant could only blink at his remark.

“He was awfully big for his age when he came into the world.” Willow answered, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “But it just proves his strength and how he didn’t mean to give his Muti such a hard time. No you didn’t!” She teased the little one next, giving him a raspberry earning another laugh.

Weiss gave a dreamy sigh. “Oh, don’t you worry just yet my little snow monster. We’ve got a lot more to figure out.” She earned a babble of agreement out of her son.

Winter got up. “And hopefully he...Mmgh.” Another grunt, she steadied herself with grasping the cane. “He won’t run too much when I’m on babysitting detail. I’ll be in my office.”

Her sister got up, taking her arm. “Here. Let me help.”

“I’m okay, Weiss. Really.” The specialist insisted with her cane wobbling at her sister’s touch.

“No you’re not.” She backtalked. But not before supporting her. “Is your leg acting up again?”

“...Yes. My painkiller prescription has been delayed ever since President Baum had cut back on Specialist healthcare in light of the frontline grunts. Not that I blame them.” Well, that hurt to mention the G.I.'s of Atlas in light of her own health problems sustained in the line of duty.

“Then you should be in bed.” Weiss demanded. Not as CEO, but as her sibling.

Winter nodded. “Good idea. Klein, could you please get my laptop?”

“Certainly, Winter.” The butler answered. “You do look like you need a leg pillow as well.”

“It wouldn’t hurt.” Winter answered with a small smile. “Mother, Neptune, will you be alright with Dominick?”

“Of course, dear.” The older mom told her.

“Yeah, we got him.” Neptune answered with another warm nod.

-------

A/N: Unfortunately, due to Tumblr having a frigging character limit, this must be posted in two parts. Until then, hope you enjoy the first part of this segment.

[the-sunshine-dims]

Amnesia rewrite! (chapter 2 electric boogaloo)

Logan’s here now!

ch 1 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5 | ch 6 | ch 7

original fic

words: 1,799

ao3 

contents and warnings: angst (past), hurt/comfort, friendly teasing, amnesia, Janus is mentally a child, injury, blood, hypothetical dead body, cursing, Logan’s kinda blunt,

______

By the time Roman had gotten to Logan’s door, which had taken surprisingly long since Roman wanted to make sure he was careful, with janus, the poor side who had ended up completely and utterly asleep pretty much the moment roman began walking, utterly exhausted, and honestly Roman wouldn’t admit it but he imagines he’d be exhausted as well if he was in Janus’s place.

Roman looked at Janus again before sighing and doing his best to adjust him into one arm so he could knock on Logan’s door, and once he had, he knocked, making sure to be the quietest he could while still being heard on the other end as not to wake up Janus,

And Soon emerged Logan, who looked tired and grumpy and like he was about to tell them to go away, but then his eyes caught Janus, and Roman could see the confusion and curiosity ignite in his eyes, so when those curious eyes met Romans, roman just pointed inside and mouthed ‘not now, inside.’ Logan, deciding this was more important than work at the moment, just shook his head to himself, nodded and opened his door to let them in.

Roman made his way to the bed and carefully set Janus on it, and when Janus began to stir in his sleep, roman huffed a laugh before summoning a warm blanket and setting it onto him, which placated him enough to remain asleep. 

Then when roman was done with that he turned to Logan and walked with him across the room to where Janus wouldn’t wake up from the noise, before the conversation began.

Logan was first to talk, “okay care to fill me in?” He gestured vaguely to Janus “Because frankly there’s no way somethings not wrong, He was just sleeping in your arms which is very uncharacteristic if you haven't noticed-“ he glanced at Janus just a second or two too long before turning to Roman “-.. and he’s bleeding, or at least had been bleeding.” 

Roman sighed and nodded “yeah.. okay so my theory is Janus had stumbled into the imagination and something got to him. And I also think.. he may have hit his head, or something.. if i'm right.” Roman spared a concerned glance to Janus before turning his head to Logan once again.

Logan looked between the two for a minute before going “.. are.. are you suggesting amnesia?”

“I.. think so, Janus didn’t seem to recognize me and he got all freaked out when he saw all of the family portraits didn’t include king and then he got even more freaked out when I told him king was split and when i asked if he remembered, unless he was the best actor in the world- which is impossible since that’s me-“ he fake coughed before continuing -“I would have figured out if he was lying when he said he didn’t remember. Also” he vaguely gestured to him “Janus would never cry in front of us, especially full on sob, which he did, in front of me. so even if he didn’t have amnesia something is definitely wrong.”

Logan took a couple minutes to process all that information before simply going “ah, it's good you brought him to me then,” and then after another second or so he gave a thoughtful look and continued “it’s.. changed a lot since king was around, and if that’s around where his memory is  we need to keep and eye on him so he doesn’t get hurt,” he told him seriously before he huffed a laugh “we don’t need another side walking into a door.”

Roman nodded to what Logan was saying before he fully processed the last bit in which he gasped in offense and pointed at him accusingly “I’ll have you know that that only happened once! You hear me? Once!” And though he continued muttering about ‘that happens once and this is my treatment?’ He stopped talking to logan for the moment.

Logan chuckled, and after a minute or so Roman stopped muttering angrily and instead made the noise of a lightbulb going off In his head, before he began speaking “also because he was definitely bleeding earlier we should get him to take a bath or a shower so he doesn’t just.. die or something” 

Logan nodded “yes it would be a good idea to clean the wounds, though I don’t believe he would die if we didn't since we are figments of thomas’s imagination, at worst there’d be a really bad infection, though i definitely do need to see how deep those wounds are.”

Roman nodded “and this, my dear nerd, is why I brought him to you.”

Logan let out an unamused huff as he shook his head, then after a couple moments he quieted “roman, king creativity hasn’t been around for a very long time, so, Janus may very well be in the headspace of a child, so be careful to be soft with him while we figure everything out. okay?”

Roman nodded quietly “okay.”

______

After an hour or so Janus woke up, and after another ten or so minutes he was fully conscious.

Which meant they had to talk to him, since they couldn't just.. Not.

Roman started first, “okay, okay, Dee?” He asked softly. internally questioning if him saying dee was correct, but deciding that he thought calling him deceit would be cold under the circumstances and calling him Janus probably wouldn’t be good if he didn’t remember the previous time before he passed out, so Dee it was. He continued “okay, so here’s the thing-“ he cut himself off again, really how do you explain to someone their head got all Fucky wucky and now they don’t got most of the memories? Really, how do you do it?

 After a moment he sent a look of ‘help’ to Logan and after a sigh that went unnoticed by janus, logan cut in “so, me and roman, we were talking earlier.. and after everything we’ve deduced we’re almost certain you have a case of amnesia, most likely from blunt force trauma.” 

Roman interrupted him there, “okay specs I don’t think it’s the appropriate time to flex on him with your medical knowledge you got from watching some medical show, chill.”

Logan fake coughed “yes umm..” he trailed off before they paid attention to Janus again who looked.. well at a loss for words for one, as he just sat there.

Then after a couple long uncomfortable minutes he spoke up just offering a small “oh,” and shifting uncomfortably “okay” He continued before looking down at his lap and fiddling with his hands, making Logan and Roman look between themselves nervously once again, not knowing if they should leave him be to process the information, though not leaving him in the room by himself, or send him on a task to get his mind off things for the moment so everything won’t be so overwhelming.

After a bit of just letting him sit though they realized leaving him be didn’t seem to be helping any so Logan spoke up, “okay, deceit, I know you got a lot to process but we need to get you washed up to see how severe your injuries are.”

Janus shook his head adamantly, his mood changing almost immediately at the change of topic, the earlier information disappearing from his mind. “no! Baths suck!”

Logan took a breath, trying to consider his counter argument to that before Roman interrupted “they do, but! If you take a nice warm shower or bath you can get off the dried blood, and me and Logan will get you a nice, clean, warm and fluffy pair of pajamas for you to relax in?” Roman negotiated.

Janus was visibly considering it, and after a couple moments made a show of sighing “fine! But if the faucet's water starts turning into blood from a dead body in the sewers I will scream so loud, and I will personally blame you.” He told him seriously. 

Roman couldn't help but chuckle “don’t worry I’m pretty sure that’s really statistically unlikely! I think..” he tried, his reassuring tone becoming more questioning in the last words, 

Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “ignore him, he’s not the side to go to for statistics,” he said making Roman gasp in faux-offense, “-but don’t worry, we’re sides so that cannot happen to us as we are fully imagined, err- i promise that their will be no dead bodies in the sewers.”

Janus hummed in consideration of that before simply going “‘kay,” and that was the end of that conversation, after a minute or so roman headed to the bathroom to set up a bath for janus while janus immediately followed him to try his best to sternly tell roman he could do it himself, not that roman listened, only leaving when he was done, happily saluting himself away as janus practically pouted at him.

_____

“Hey specs?”

“Yes Roman?”

“I wonder how Patton, Virgil, and Remus will react to.. This,” he made vague gestures to everything, 

“..I don’t know, on the amnesia side I’m sure Patton would begin doting on him and Virgil would constantly be making sure he didn’t somehow die by not knowing where bread was, or on the other end of the spectrum virgil might try to avoid janus altogether,  but on the Janus being in a child’s mindset because of the amnesia.. I don’t know, I mean we all used to be the best of friends, the four of us, you know, so they would likely get along with him, hell if it wasn’t for the school adults constantly telling the kids that lying is evil and and having darker of an imagination then puppies-” he abruptly cut himself just as he was beginning to rant, though it was still semi obvious to roman that was the reason they stopped being friends with janus. “I don’t know, I’m sorry, those three are The most unpredictable of the six of us, and I don't even have the vaguest idea what remus’s reaction would be.”

Roman nodded “yeah.. though I think regardless, Patton should be the first person we tell, virgil will probably feel anxious about it and if he's the first to be told he might feel like he has to keep it a secret which’ll make him feel more anxious, and again like you said.. We don't know how Remus'll react, though, regardless of who we tell, we should wait till tomorrow, it's late, and Janus literally sobbed today and we still need to check over his wounds, and I'm pretty sure he needs more rest then a nap- so.. tomorrow?”

Logan nodded, knowing even if roman didnt list his reasons he’d of agreed “tomorrow.”

[alixanonymous]

How A Demon Commissions An Angel ~ A Daminette FanFic ~ Chapter 4: A Plan In Progress

From: DoWhatISay@email.com

To: Marinette.D.C.@email.com

Date: November 3, 2021 5:00 P.M.

Subject: I Accept Your Terms

Dear Ms. Dupain-Cheng,

I do not delude myself into thinking we will be able to magically solve each other’s problems but it does seem as though we both lack certain qualities the other does not. If you’re offering the chance for me to stay where I am, I would be a fool not to take it and I am not a fool. If I can also help fix your unfortunate situation, I will do so. 

Let me know where we go from here.

- Damian W.

From the phone of Marinette Dupain-Cheng:

The Ladyblog 

A Retraction Of An Earlier Article Nov 4 2021 

I’ve decided to take down an earlier article entitled “MDC Stole My Best Friend’s Designs!” following contact from the legal team of Jagged Stone. It was wrong of me to make accusations without proof and I will endeavor to provide evidence to back any claims I make on this blog in the future.

- Alya Cesaire, Creator of the Ladyblog

Chat Name: Aunt Penny

Aunt Penny: Are you sure you don’t want us to pursue any further action Marinette? That statement hardly seemed sincere and was not nearly sufficient considering all she’s claimed. We can help you know.

Me: It’s fine Aunt Penny. Anything else wouldn’t be worth the trouble. It’s not her fault anyway.

Aunt Penny: You know I don’t agree with that but okay, if you’re sure. Just remember the lawsuits have already been drafted.

Aunt Penny: By the way, Jagged’s suit was a real hit at the charity dinner. Not that we ever had a doubt. Have you been thinking about creating a new website?

Me: That’s great to hear. I’ll think about it, okay?

Aunt Penny: That’s good.

Chat Name: Alya

Alya: Girl, I know what you’re thinking but just because I had to post that statement doesn’t mean Lila’s lying. She just can’t release any proof because she wants to do the right thing and keep MDC’s identity a secret. She’s being the bigger person!

Me: She always is.

Alya: Don’t be like that! Please Marinette. Stop letting your jealousy cloud your judgement.

Chat Name: Uncle Jagged

Uncle Jagged: Pens told me that you dont want to sue i get it, lawsuits are totally not rock n’ roll but feeding that liar and her friends to fang is always an option!!!

Me: No, Uncle Jagged.

Uncle Jagged: fine…

Uncle Jagged: i got so much applause for your suit at the stuffy dinner btw.

Uncle Jagged: of course I told them all that my talented young niece made it.

Uncle Jagged: even had a billionaire’s son begging for a referral but dont worry i turned him down for you 

Me: What?! Why?!

Uncle Jagged: trust me, Mari, he was totally not rock n’ roll. not rock n’ roll at all! just rude

Chat Name: Adrien

Adrien: Hey Marinette, did you see the apology on the Ladyblog?

Me: You mean the retraction?

Adrien: Well, yes. 

Adrien: Look, Marinette, you’re not going to do anything else right? She took it down.

Me: She took it down because “she had no proof” not because she knows Lila lied. She’s still convinced even after Jagged’s legal team got involved although we both know the truth.

Adrien: I'm sorry.

Adrien: Even my father feels bad, he knows how much rumors like that could damage an artist’s reputation especially without proof.

Adrien: But he’s still convinced Lila’s someone I need to associate with and if you try to expose her again it’s going to be like every other time and I don’t want things to get worse for you.

Adrien: I’m sorry Mari.

Adrien: I just can’t help you while my father’s still on her side.

Google Search History: 

Gotham Charity Dinner 2021 Photos

Patricide but for uncles

What is it called when someone kills their uncle?

How to know if a friendship is toxic

From:Marinette.D.C.@email.com

To:DoWhatISay@email.com

Date:November 5, 2021  5:05 P.M.

Subject: The Plan

Hey Damian!

Sorry for the delay in responding. I don’t know if you saw but MDC had a bit of a problem to deal with yesterday. So here’s how I see it. Our plan has two parts: the commission for your brothers and then us trying to help each other out with our people problems.

For the commission: You already gave me the measurements which I’m trusting are up to standard since I’m not flying to America any time soon. Next I need to know exactly what you want me to make for each of your brothers: Grayson, Todd, and Drake, the measurements say are their names right? Then I need to know who you think wants a sweater and who wants a jacket and your ideas for the design. I’ll draw up some designs based on the information and send them to you for approval with an estimate of the cost. (Normally I’d also send a non-disclosure agreement beforehand too but considering how this all started I’m guessing you’re not going to give me your real name for the paperwork, are you?) After they’re approved I’ll need you to deposit half the sum in my account (Information attached) and I’ll use it to buy the materials.

If I can get all of this done in the next week or so, it should leave me about a month to finish the pieces before sending them out (An address will not be optional fyi). Sounds good??

For the other part of our plan: the way I could see it going is when one of us has a problem we could use the other person for sort of a different perspective. It’s like in those cartoons when the character has those two little people on their shoulders, do you know what I’m talking about? One’s good, the other’s bad and they’re both telling the person to do different things. Not that you’re bad I mean and not that I just assumed that of the two of us you’d be the bad one…  I’m not saying any of this right. I just mean it like I said before, I could learn a thing or time from someone who isn’t too concerned with pleasing everybody. (I didn’t mean that as an insult by the way. I actually find it kind of admirable.)

So, here’s an example of a situation I could use your opinion on: today I started to wonder if one of my friendships is no longer healthy anymore. I have this friend who is the only other person in our class that knows Lila’s lying. At first he convinced me that her lies weren’t hurting anybody and that as long as we both knew the truth then it didn’t matter what anybody else thought. Eventually, we both realized that that was no longer the case when she almost got me expelled, but by then she had convinced his father that I was a bad influence on him. So now he’s forced to play nice and keep her happy to please his father.

It’s hard because even though I know he knows she’s lying, he can’t tell anyone else so no one believes me when I try to tell them. Now she’s made good on her promise to turn everyone against me and so I have to deal with all her antics by myself while she stands by his side with the rest of the class. I know he’s in a bad position but it still doesn’t make me feel better when he texts me asking if I’m okay after  something happens while at the same time whenever we’re with other people, he keeps his distance so she doesn’t report him to his father.

I guess I’m just tired of trying to make him feel better all the time. However, whenever I think about ending our friendship, I feel guilty because it’s really not his fault. His father wouldn’t hesitate to pull him from school and then we couldn’t be friends anyway. I feel like a good friend would stick by his side. I don’t know. What do you think, Damian? 

I guess that’s just how I see this going then. I rant about whatever I’m having to deal with and you tell me if you agree with how I’m handling it and vice versa. You mention some type of incident with a classmate right? Do you want an outside opinion of that or has your family’s sufficed? Or is there anything else you could use some advice on? I guess we’re just making this up as we go. I mean I suppose there aren’t any rules about relationships that started with one person trying to blackmail the other, right? :P

Hope to hear from you soon! Love,

Marinette

P.S. If this is going to work, you can’t just ignore me when I call you out on being (for lack of a better word) snobbish, Mr. Postscript.

Hello, it’s me again. I just spent like an hour working on chapter nine so my headache’s making itself know again but I wanted to at least post a chapter today. Thank you to anyone who’s been reblogging, liking, or replying to these! It makes the unenjoyable task of reposting worth it! More chapters soon!

Master List

[apathycarestostudy]

How to Journal: From one Beginner to Another

So you want to start journaling and have no idea (or patience) how to get into it to where it becomes a permanent habit. If you’ve failed to keep one going, if you’re just starting out, or you don’t know what to do with one — these tips are for you. 

1. Define your goals

What exactly are you planning on gaining from this? Most commonly (to my knowledge), the top reasons why people journal is to manage their lives, and have a private outlet. There’s a million things you can do with your journal, and more often than not you can make a hybrid of sorts if you prefer, so don’t worry about mixing genres. This is your journal.

A side note though, if you’ve tried to keep a journal before with some goal in mind (ex: study journal) and failed, please don’t sink into aversion and say it’s not for you. Oftentimes it’s our mindset that’s blocking us from succeeding in anything, so hopefully with these tips (and the plethora online) you’d be able to keep going. 

An accompanying note to the side note  — if you really tried, quit wasting your time. Some things are not for everyone, and at this point in life, you know that. Don’t throw away your journal though. You’ll thank me later.

2. Name your journals!

Okay, so this is not a legit tip. It’s just something I do that helps me maintain this habit. I’ve got two journals: Dumpster and Shadow. Dumpster was my first ‘conscious’ journal. I bought it with the intentions of writing down college tips for my younger siblings first, and then my insane musings later. I stopped and occasionally felt guilty about it, and when I wanted to buy another one and start afresh, the guilt would keep from doing so. After I got over my stupidity and got a dual journal set, I started using one as an outlet of sorts and put away the other for when I finished this. Why these ridiculous names you ask?

About 75% of Shadow’s entries are of me ranting about people and my habits, 15% are declarations of doing better, and 10% are stuff I’m doing at the moment, new music I’ve discovered and stuff. My goal of keeping this is to freeze my thoughts at the moment and look back on them and reflect. Maybe get some advice, and most definitely see how stupid I was lol. So it’s shadowing my life so to speak  — hence the name.

Dumpster is the first journal I was talking about, and the name is pretty self explanatory. The things I want to rave about and the stuff I don’t want ruining the sanctity of Shadow goes in there. Besides that, I put in a tracker for stuff I get fed up not doing, to-do lists for days I have no direction, and very recently, my wishes and goals, as well as a list of accomplishments I’ve made in the past for when I feel like I can’t do something. I don’t write in Dumpster as often, but it’s not seldom either.

This was pretty long for a non-legit tip. But here’s a good thing you can pull from this, besides the humour  — when you don’t know what to write, start off with an opening tag (Dearest Dumpster, Yo Shadow...) and start talking to it about what’s going on or what’s on your mind. The whole dear diary thing is legit. And if you sit down with nothing in mind to talk about and you start off with that, you start to write a letter of how ridiculous this is and boom! - you’re writing.

3. Write the date, always!

I just thought of a situation where you don’t need to just before I started typing this part smh. So...you don’t really need to do this always. There are special cases, but I strongly suggest you do. When you get to look back at this later down the line, you can see how long it took you to get off a certain mindset, how much improvement your work has made  — like a time capsule. You gotta have a date for that of course! Freezing your thoughts and being able to look back at them is one of the reasons I started journaling, and dating your entries help if you're forgetful. Some people take it a step further and include the time as well, so if you’d like, why not? Especially if you have a certain period of time you like to journal and then end up writing at a different time than your usual; did your temperament change at all? It would be an interesting thing to note in my opinion!

4. The area you pick is both meaningful and meaningless.

Here’s the thing. I tried writing in one spot everyday at the same time, and it didn’t work for me. I came to begrudge that spot and not being able to do anything else in it. Obviously, the mistake here was that I was too extreme with the whole ‘pick an area and stick to it’ here but after a bit of experimenting, I realized that the key here is your state of mind. If you are the type to have things in order and prefer to be set in your routine, I would suggest having that extreme approach. If you’re a bit moody like me and tend to suddenly want a shift, follow your gut. If you’re on a bus and thought of something you’d like to write, write it! If you’re in the middle of cooking, switch off the stove and jot some stuff done. The area you pick can be meaningful, but it also doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.

ALSO, STAY SAFE. DON’T LEAVE THE STOVE ON AND RUN TO GET YOUR PEN.

5.  Privacy? Code names? Being careful in general.

If you don’t live alone, I suggest you protect your safe space, It’s not for any particular reason other than holding on to your flow, because if you misplace your trust in someone and they end up reading it and bring something up, it could really dampen your spirits. If you have some sensitive info in there, it would hurt and discourage you if you don’t be careful. It might seem like a chore, but it’s worth it in the long haul. I live with my siblings, and I trust them completely not to touch my stuff, but I still don’t refer to them or other people in my journal explicitly. They’re all under code names. It’s also a fun little thing you know, screaming about what tea tree oil did in class and nobody’ll ever figure out who you’re talking about.

Of course, if you’re keeping a digital journal, that’s a bit easier. Slap a lock on that -

That’s mainly all you need to push you forward or help you start. You may reach a couple more roadblocks. Here are a few suggestions and reminders I’d like to add so you can breeze through the tough parts a bit quicker:

Create a twist that you can look forward to. Switch up the pen colour after two weeks of writing, make a page full of stickers or quotes, make a list of new songs you discovered that week - anything!

Don’t be afraid of going off track. If you intended it to be one thing, and want to write something else, go for it. See it as more pages being filled.

Your journal, your rules. 

Writing block isn’t the end. Try writing unsent letters, or pick a random prompt and try expounding on it, or maybe draw your interpretation of something and jot down your judgment at the end of it.

 Re-reading is the icing on the cake!

Here’s to our collective success~

[cutiepisenpai]

Dear Stranger Series Ch. 5: Unicorn(Spencer Reid x Female OC)

Chapter 1 

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Warnings: Some suggestive sexual activities(nothing graphic), Fluff

Melinda and Spencer’s morning routine starts off normal, the alarm rings and one of them hits snooze, it rings again and the other turns it off, when it rings a third they finally start to get up. “Ugh, we need a vacation.” Melinda groans sitting up in the bed. Although it can be assumed that the good doctor was a morning person, he was in fact less enthusiastic about the early hours of the day. It took at least two cups of coffee before he gained any kind of pep although he can function if necessary.  But Melinda has a trick of her own to get him moving. “You know if we’re quick I can put on the coffee now and we can shower together.” It works like a charm he is up heading for the shower before she even has a chance to get up. 

Arriving at Quantico a few minutes late, their shower activities dragged on a little too long. Spencer has a thermos with coffee but he will need more soon. Spencer is walking behind Melinda arms wrapped around her,his head resting atop of her head, it makes for a rather weird walk but he’s ok with that. Walking through the doors of the BAU the strange site garners the attention of the team eliciting giggles from JJ, Penelope, and Emily. Morgan rounds the corner taking in the site laughing, “Long night?” Spencer, still not fully functional on the singal cup of coffee, just nods in response. This causes the others to erupt in laughter. “Attay Boy, but he looks like the one that has been worn out so maybe it should be an atta girl?” He says, quirking an eyebrow. Melinda thinks it's best to just ignore all of them and heads towards hers and Spencer's desks, stopping in front of Spencer’s. “This is your stop.” He kisses the top of her head before taking a seat at his desk as Melinda moves around to set her stuff down. 

Today has been an uneventful day for the BAU, they don’t have a current case so it is a catch up on paperwork day. Spencer is in his own personal heaven speeding through his paperwork much to the dismay of everyone. Melinda specifically cannot fathom his love of paperwork and as his complete opposite in this area she was in hell. Slowly reading through each file. Spencer has offered a few times to take a portion of her files but she refuses each offer she could move faster through it but was just unmotivated to do so. Since there isn't much need to hear everyone else they’re working semi-independently she decides to place an earbud in her ear humming along to the music as she works. 

   Completely enveloped in the paperwork before her and the music flowing in her ear Melinda missing Penelope walking up behind her exclaiming, “Lucy, you got some splainin to do.” in her best Ricky Ricardo impression. Receiving no response from Melinda she taps her on the shoulder. “Hey girly, you got some splainin to do.” Melinda is confused, wondering if she forgot something. She may be just and smart as her other half but one of the many differences they share is she does not have an eidetic memory. “Yes my love, what did I do?” She decides to just ask. “You know how I always joke and call you a unicorn because like how does a person as perfect as you exist.” Penelope starts to explain. “I’ve told you a hundred times I am not perfect. I am actually rather strange, I thought you would have noticed by now.” “Shush it I’m making a point. You are very weird but your cute habits just add to your charm. You failed to mention you are an actual unicorn and that is not an exaggeration.” Penelope continues to rant. “Come on Pen seriously what the hell are you talking about?” Melinda asks, not following her Rant. From above them Rossi calls out, “Maybe she finally saw those devilish horns growing from your forehead and confused it with a unicorn.” He says with a laugh. “Alright everyone to the conference now.” She demands grabbing Melinda by the arm and heading off. Spencer who was getting his 5th cup of coffee for the day missing the conversation that had just happened is confused coming in to sit down. “Did we get a case?” He asks. “No but something much more important has come to my intention. You are all familiar with our resident Unicorn, well look at this.” On the screen appears Melinda’s face yet again but this photo is much older taken about 8 years prior. The biggest difference in her appearance other than her age is the rainbow dyed hair she is sporting. Oh that’s what she meant when she said Unicorn. “Where did you even find that I don't have social media for you to cipher through.” Melinda asks, genuinely intrigued by where the photo came from. “Oh I talked to your bff and she was more than happy to share about your rebellious stage.” Penelope says changing the screen to show other photos of Melinda in her teens sporting all different colors of hair. “I don’t know if I would call it rebellious more along the lines of I was already done with 3 degree at the time and wanted to have fun before I had to start working and having “natural” hair color.” Melinda looked at all the photos four different rainbow hair colors, two blue and one purple. She really didn’t see it as all that rebellious. She just wanted to have fun and with her dad constantly working being left with her stepmother (the wicked witch of the west as Melinda calls her) she felt the need to bring joy into her life and she used color to do so. Now that she thinks about it rubbing her ear feeling all the piercings she began adorning along with the dyed hair, she guesses she may have had a mild teenage rebellion. “Hey at least it's not as bad as Emily’s high school photos.” Spencer says coming to her defense. But not quite thinking of the consequences of throwing his co-worker under the bus, Emily makes an offended sound, “Really is that how it's gonna be? Why don’t we just pull up everyone's teen photos and compare?” Emily's comments cause a commotion, everyone disagreeing with taking things that far. Melinda turns to Spencer, “So would you still date me if I had rainbow hair?” He pauses for a moment before answering, “Yes but please don’t dye your hair.”