#so ill be taking a small break
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Hihi!!! Get hit with a post with a bunch of meme doodles.
Sorry for not posting that much as of recent, but this is not me saying I’m gonna be posting more right now. I’m actually gonna be taking a small hiatus so i can focus on my upcoming finals (helppp the stress is killing meeee). I will be potentially lurking and drawing stuff in the background, but no posts until finals are over!
#tgdart#tgd#cotl#cult of the lamb#art#drawing#cotl fanart#digital art#cotl lamb#cotl heket#cotl kallamar#cult of the lamb fanart#memes#im actually quite stressed about upcoming finals#and trying to balance posting on social media makes it slightly worse#so ill be taking a small break#you bet ima try to come back swinging with posts tho ehehhe#cotl forneus#cotl narinder#cotl aym#cotl baal
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the start of witch hat atelier before u realize how fucked the whole thing is is funny because you'll be reading and coco and agathe and tetia and riche are so cute and the world is so beautiful with so much lore and symbolism and they'll be going on adventures and learning and making new spells and having fun and making magic and smiling and playing pretend and all. They deal with some big issues, but ultimately, friendship prevails, they cook they clean olruggio's there yes there's a big conspiracy but coco's gonna figure it out! everything's gonna be okay!!!
And then you glance out of the corner of your eye. And qifrey is over there and he's like. Having a manic episode
#loser#i cant even describe the face i make whenever he comes up#its like some combination of 😶 and 😒 its a nasty grimace i can tell you that#literally whats he even thinking like damn girl take a break#anyway agott and tetia are literally my favorites and riche is so interesting#im curious to see how things will progress with her brother#what circumstances surround them etc.#and im curious where tetias parents are#any adults really except for olruggio and qifrey obviously although they do a pretty good job#witch culture seems extremely independent you could probably correlate intelligence and learning to your parents regard for you but whateve#i have a small theory about coco's dead dad but its pretty undersupported and i might just be projecting a troupe so im going to ignore it#anyway i love the series!!!#wha#witch hat atelier#qifrey#coco wha#agott arkrome#tetia#olruggio#my posts#text post#I saved this to my drafts in september and im still right so sure ill post
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#cathycliff#heathcathy#limbus company#project moon#promoon#lc heathcliff#lc catherine#fanart#xavi art#sinclair and demian tag but they are barely noticeable#based on that modern cg...#zzz....... ill take another small break#i feel so unsatisfied with what im producing#but im happy you guys enjoy it :")#always enjoyed reading the tags ><
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AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY
#I WASNT EVEN MEANING TO SO I ACCIDENTALLY SKIPPED THE DIALOGUE BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING FUCK#ill go and find it later if only to give myself peace of mind. BUT WOW. WHAT THE FUCK#my original plan was to 1) work my way to the king and talk to him 2) doom myself and take everyone down with me 3) loop back to floor 3#so i can visit the observatory and scrounge for any lore. although since i got killed that run siffrin asked the king to kill him first#which was intereresting. but i decided to have all doors unlocked that time around so i can just get the starcrest and go#but for some reason it wasnt working so i went to get the keyknife since i was already there and completely forgot i already had it#from the previous loop and THATS what triggered it. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO SCARY BUT ALSO I THINK I GET WHAT THEY MEAN#about siffrin going back without actually changing. going along with a script even if his feelings on things change#the same way he has his own small rituals like the carving thing and does it for constancy. reassurance or safety even#and the times when he breaks script and ends horribly like the sadness attacking thing and bonnie yelling at him cause him to loop#to avoid it. although i cant really say anything bc id probably do the same thing. maybe not for the same reasons since im cruel#and make him do the worst to see what will happen since i put curiosity over rejection sensitivity as an observer and player but well.#i feel wrongfooted bringing it up since i dont have it myself but i have to wonder if this kind of leans into ocd tendencies.. i remember#reading something about how ocd is fuelled by fear. and things like counting and rituals are kind of used to cope with that?#if anyone knows anything more or talked abt it already id be really interested in hearing it bc im almost sure im not#the first to come to this conclusion. but i simply dont know enough nor have the confidence to broach the topic rn esp with how often#misconceptions around ocd get casually passed around so its hard for me to know what is and isnt a baseless assumption#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#playthru#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#change god#WHAT WAS THAT WITH WEARING LOOPS FACE THOUGH WHAT THE FUCKKK
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yoU KNOW WHAT????? get NARRATOR'd
that's right....ive been turned over to the dark side (stanely parable) (PLEASE click for better quality 🙏)
sorry for not being around for a while !! hope yall still like this one :>
(img below is the normal-ish ver)
aa!! here you go :3

#ibis paint x#art#the stanley parable#tsp narrator#tsp#tspud narrator#the stanley parable narrator#ermm....so like this took me like uhh two hours??#genuinely i love this one tho#what a british !!!!!!!!!!!! person !!!!! thing !!#i was taking a break for a while sorry gang 😔#😔#i put so many small details...my hHANDS#blood sweat AND tears went into this one 🙏#anyways ill like see you around or smth idrc#:0
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its so funny to me that like two months ago i was just like "huh whats this nerdy prudes stuff, that one animatic looked cool i guess ill watch it" and now in the past liek two weeks ive fallen so down the starkid rabbit hole that im spending almost every day just wathcing these stupid musicals over and over again. literally watching nerdy prudes as we speak. watched working boys in class earlier. finished black friday again just earlier today. i keep drawing these stupid guys when i cant listen to it. sigh
#so the cycle continues#pick a piece of auditory media to like obsess over#spend either one month or nine dedicated to it#take a week break from everything and feel hollow#find a new one#and repeat#hamilton -> nothing bc i was a fucking lame ass middleschooler -> qsmp streams -> mcyt -> a myriad of shows and musicals -> jrwi#-> other small interests -> starkid#this is the cycle#a musical/series#then smth mcyt related#AND NOT THAT I DONT LIKE JRWI#im just not on my grind rn like i was with riptide where i watched like 3 episodes a day minimum with my full attention dedicated to it#still love all of the jrwi crew and everything about it#im just on a mini adventure in the world of other things#im also on my drawing grind#which is GREAT FOR ME#bc it means i can finally draw things i like with like aaaa 50% chance of not hating it#sigh i should go to bed#i just dont wanna text ppl i know rn#but im yapping#so no one may read this#or care#but ig if that singular mutual sees helloooo#also knowing oz he'll go through my acc and look what i posted so i finished the cat mask finally#it looks good too!!#but anywyas#sigh ill post my mask stuff eventuallyyyy#somedayyy#possiblyyyy
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🖋🌱🍀 good morning witch hat atelier nation!!!!! 😤 i need your opinions. for science
#ive been thinking of drawing more of the charas and adding more to my button set#but over the years. i noticed most people just buy their favourite 1-3 charas so it might not be worth it.#but on the other hand for the small handful of people who get the set. they are very happy to have all of the characters.#i dunno ill think about it#at the very least i think coustas is a fan fave#i do need a break from merch bc im getting burnt out and disillusioned. just testing the waters#maybe ill just take it as a popularity contest and draw them for fun#witch hat atelier#as for me ! i think i have a soft spot for beldaruit. goofy lil guy what can be better than stylish old men
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recorded my voice about half an hour or so ago because i wanted to know what my voice sounds like — for context, i avoid speaking on video and don't send voice texts, so i just had a faint idea so far; my voice has always been an insecurity for me as i was always told that my voice is too high & squeaky. but since moving towns and getting to know new people for the first time in years, i've occasionally gotten compliments on my voice, which, you know, kind of confuses me as being told that i have a pleasant voice is the contrary of what i've been told before, so i got curious, and this is my impression: i do have a higher voice, though not squeaky; i don't know if i would categorize my voice as 'pleasant', but i would say it's a normal voice and nothing like what i had been told my voice was before meeting these new people. i also kind of recognize that i don't have to be ashamed of my voice anymore, which i guess is good. i also feel like my articulation sounds much more clear when recorded than it does to me as i speak the words, which i find surprising as well. after that i recorded what my voice sounds like in english because i once heard that the way your voice sounds changes slightly depending on the language you speak (given the different intonations), and i don't think it does, but i have recognized for myself that my accent is much, much worse than i thought. so. there's that lol
#i think it's fun that the older i get the more wrong believes i manage to break down#just kinda sad it takes so long to find out what wrong believes im holding on to and then to learn how to change that specific belief#for this one i think ill start recording my voice from now on once every day so that i can get used to what i sound like#diary#my diary#small ramble
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ok i'm going to sleep but for the first time in months there has been progress on my quest to quantify how much dialogue each Star Trek character has!!! i've located and fixed the mysterious error that was giving me grief last time i was working on this project and now know what i need to get done — basically just making graphs for each individual character per season and then writing up the relevant tumblr posts with a brief interpretation. i did TOS tonight and it took about 2 hours so fingers crossed i'll knock the rest of them out in a few days and can finally share my results!
#i could release the masterpost i wrote up now but i want to put everything out at the same time because all the data is on one sheet anyways#and knowing me ill take another 6 month break lmao#i was trying to figure out a way to do cross-show comparisons for so long but i couldnt figure it out besides looking at the captains#i had a few other cool analysis angles but all of them got too confusing + too small sample size#i did end up doing a gender & race comparison because i think thats genuinely useful (and has interesting results)#my brain is kinda friend though because the tos was definitely the most boring of the data bc its not an ensemble show#but it felt weird to *not* include it yknow#okay okay im going to sleep#just had to update yall with my fun friday night plans#sometimes i just think about how long ive been working on this and cry (about a year and a half)#my posts
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I can’t even imagine living without anxiety. Like. How. What?
#I mean if I woke up tomorrow with a normal amount of anxiety it would be a shocking difference to my daily life. and I am medicated!!! like.#what? am I missing something here?#my mom tells me that meds can only do so much and that they’re really just meant to make it so you can get out of bed every day#but now I’m wondering like is that true or is that my mom is on the wrong dose herself and something could be done to help us both#gahhhhh idk I just feel helpless bc I’m scared of making big changes and the big changes have to make are scary and large and I need a#bulleted list made of things I can do (and break down into very small steps) to actually progress in a positive way in my life instead of#being SO afraid and SO stagnant. it’s been six months since (ptsd diagnosis causing thing) and I don’t feel like I’ve made any progress even#with a therapist. I’m working towards a more intensive program but I feel like it’s almost making me feel more alienated bc I’d have to like#go be surrounded by other mentally ill people and medical people which brings dad dying trauma and like I know I’m running from it bc I’m#afraid to face the changes I need to make and the feelings that are going to come up but fuck man can’t I get some fucking meds that make#this easier to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! grief and ptsd and long term isolation and anxiety and chronic pain like fuck it’s#so exhausting!!!! I feel like I’m fucking fighting thru life and then from the outside it’s like I’m doing nothing cause I stay in my room#and get stoned and play animal crossing and watch tv and cry and over eat and sometimes I drive around in circles so I can scream sing until#my throat burns and I get a headache and everything finally quiets down in my head for a second. I know I look like I’m doing nothing and#that’s because I am doing nothing but waiting for the next time a mental health professional will talk to me for an hour like it’s so sad#anyways. you ever take a big dab and then start crying and type all of this like it’s an epiphany even tho it’s things you already know.#honestly crying in front of the air conditioner is so slay slight breeze over my face cooling the tears the white noise calming me down
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been following you since PRE bubblegum karkat days and it’s been really nice watching you grow and heal and whenever i see you on my dash and think of your growth it reminds me of my own healing journey. i find that really nice
HAHA that was AGES ago dude. my god. i cant believe youre still around, that was like, the worst of it LOLOL weve both probably come a looong way since then, yeah. life used to be abysmal but now ive got my hubby and mother in law and were moving to nola next month so theres nothing to fear =')
#we found the perfect house in the perfect neighborhood in the perfect part of the city so#we are hoping and praying. our sickass real estate agent did a walkthru yesterday and said#'its been on the market for a while so if you put in for it youll probably get it'#very exciting news theres even a patio we can screen in EASILY for our cats#right outside our bedroom door! it would be perfect for entertaining!#were finally going to make irl friends!!!!! sdkjksdjfksd#i had a couple freak friends in phoenix and like 2 cool friends but like. mostly. freaks.#so im hoping to make real actual friends this go round cause we sure as hell didnt out here in the sticks of al#yippeeeeeeee#babe is also going to get a job so i can take a break bc ive been doing coms to support us for years now and its STRESSFUL#im gunna get to go on a small vacation and kick back like#life is so good#im so excited to rest and chill#im gunna sew!! so much stuff!!!!#maybe ill even list some on here for people to buy like i just want to make so many little dudes all the time#but i dont have the time or energy to devote to that bc making patterns takes time and materials#IDK IDK TOTALLY OFF TOPIC#i dont talk about my daily life much actually its usually just specific shit so im taking the opportunity to say.#i grew up in a VERY bleak way. brother were talking moldy food bank food house rotting both my guardians so so sick#dropped out of middle school to be a fulltime caregiver lost both of them anyway#then a bunch of falling out with my family etc etc i had NOTHING going into my twenties but a FUCKTON of trauma and mistrust#and now im heading for my thirties and i am the healthiest and happiest i have ever been in my entire life#i look great i feel great i do pretty good for myself and the people around me#i love love love my friends im t4t gay married i have a cat thats like a pokemon partner. to me. its perfect#yes weve made a lot of plans that have fallen thru and were not where we thought we would be by now#but honestly? honestly? my life is really great. were broke as fuck but we get by and we love each other and thats whats UUUUUUUP#youll get there! just keep going! you have no idea what kinds of opportunities youll be offered in your life that can change everything
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I'll be honest, it's better to finish those first before opening requests (also, try limiting certain characters from getting too much pairs like 1-3 at a time)
ACTUALLY YEAH,,, I'm probably not gonna do Kazuichi for a WHILE.. sorry to the Kaz fans but like.. my whole page just can't be him
We gotta give love to some of the OTHER pairs (popular or small, aus and all)
I also do other Fandoms guys!! 😔😔
#i WILL be taking a small break though like you guys said#ill probably just draw stuff I wanna draw#ive been getting into security breach recently idk why im so late but im watching marks playthrough#i might draw more zelda stuff ive had held up#I ALSO might draw sam and max again#and parappa..#parappa by beloved#🫶🫶🫶#Maybe even pucca... do any of my pucca fans still exist??#☝️☝️☝️ errrrmm i unnooo...#IM ALSO gonna be expanding my style and doing some experimental shit
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So hear me out, but I think the bad sanses dragons should sound like capercaille birds. They sound very eerie, and are very territorial.
Brilliant idea. They give me Dust-vibes
#ill definitely get into this when the time is right#looks like we nailed the inspiration for dust's dragon!!#nightmare's been figured out#as has killer#all that's left is horror#his dragon would be a fire dragon#ravenous and hungry always#and its a living stove#perfect for on the go meals#next chapter will be out soon promise#im just taking a small break so i dont get burnout
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well look at that
i managed to finish fruits basket (2019) without drowning my pillow in tears: 10/10
#…granted it was only half the pillow but that counts as a win😭💧#Either way what a show im breatheless ❤️#Next up is FMAB then after that im taking a small anime break#This year has been so creatively fulfilling cuz im finally watching anime again after 10 years#Though i admit ive gone a tad overboard with how much ill watch in a day
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lil rant about dog training oops
#so. my 80lb gangly-ass dog is a gigantic baby for any kind of grooming or healthcare stuff.#and he was only getting more and more frantic the more i tried to get him used to it#doing it on the couch when hes sleepy? nope. starts frantically flailing around and panting wildiy#trying to introduce it slowly? nope. trying to distract him with lots of treats/a lick mat of peanut butter? nope#and this dog is prone to ear gunk and eye gunk :((((#ive had to essentially pin him a couple times for his own good to give him eye drops for an eye infection#and i felt so bad about it both times and he was panicking but like. fuck.#so. before that happens again. ive been working with him on co-operative care.#which for me looks like putting a treat on a face height chair#and while he's staring at it#ill slowly in very small stages introduce whatever i need to do (ear wipe ear drops eye drops nail trim etc)#and frequently every time i make progress#like he lets me tap his nail with the clippers or lets me get the eye dropper close to his eye without flinching#i say 'okay!' and let him eat the treat he has a couple inches from his snoot#and replace it#and repeat making as much progress each time as he'll let me#whenever he needs to take a break and its too much for him he'll back up and lie down#and i take that as a cue to put down my tools and wait#and sure enough. eventually he'll get back up and be ready to go again#its a huge time sink but honestly still so much easier than wrestling a squirming freaking out dog who's nearly as big as me#and absolutely zero panic attack level freakouts on his end that end with him stress panting for like half an hour after#using this i managed to get him to let me to wipe out his ears entirely within like 15 minutes#and same with eye drops which is HUGE because he fucking hates eye drops#like. he voluntarily stood there and let me do it. zero holding or forcing he just stands there and lets me.#anyways. idk what my point is other than despite this taking a lot of patience on my part this is so so much less stressful for both of us#and is going to create much much better habits in the long run and isnt going to create a dog who is insanely fear reactive at the groomers#and also also fuck my ex who insisted that it took too long and wasnt worth it and as long as we had two people to hold our first dog down#it didnt matter if she was panicking bc we could just overpower her#idk. dogs will do a lot for you if you just put the smallest amount of effort into working with them.#lucas the land seal
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50k words yoppee!
#twist rambles#^pained. it is so fucking long we are at 127 pages right now its so sick. hoping to get this quest done and then take a small break and#maybe get another one or two main quests done after so ill be nearly done w both act 2 paths (minus like. 2 quests on the good route)#but good god. we are on the grind. sorry i do have to post the horrors of the length updates. due to the fact i am suffering a bit the#longer it gets. what if it hits 100k words.#♟
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