#so instead of going back to sleep you spend an hour and a half typing up some notes one handed on your phone to maybe write

[spocksbedsidemanner]

.

[httpiastri]

favorites – pa17

genre: fluff, suggestive

pairing: paul aron x reader

warnings: mentions of 18+ stuff but it's pretty lowkey

word count: 1k

author's note: sleepy paul <33 forever in my heart <3<3 aaaaa this started out as me just praising paul's eyes and then his entire face and just.... yea idk im kinda obsessed. hope you enjoy and that this maybe can cheer you up from these last few races :)

3k celly l f2/f3 masterlist

paul aron is a pretty sleeper.

well, he is pretty at all times. after a race, cheeks flushed and hair messier than ever; curled up on the sofa with five blankets wrapped around him, the flu making his eyes all droopy; and maybe especially when he's standing on the top step of a podium, cap perched on his head and giant smile adorning his lips.

but even when he's asleep, lips slightly parted and nose scrunching up every once in a while, paul looks like god's most stunning creation. he's not just pretty, he's beautiful, with the type of boyish charm that can make any girl swoon.

back in the day, he adored the attention. nowadays, he only needs you to swoon, thankfully.

his light blonde curls are still tousled from the number of times your hands went through them last night, the feeling of his soft strands still lingering on your fingers. his face is so peaceful, a stark contrast to how concentrated it was a mere few hours ago when you were writhing beneath him as he whispered sweet praises into your ear.

the memory of yesterday makes a shiver shoot through your spine. it's your favorite way of getting ready to sleep; there's no better way to tire out than to spend some time with your needy boyfriend who's just come back from a triple header.

however, this is paul's favorite way of waking up.

the first thing he wants in the morning isn't coffee or a good bagel. it's to feel your legs tangled with his, your skin rubbing against his, your fingers intertwined with his. he doesn't really enjoy the sun shining in through the creak in your blinds, though.

"turn off the damn sun..."

the words lure out a sweet laugh from you, eyes fluttering closed for a moment as you relax further into your pillow. "can't really do that," you tell him with a shrug. "sorry, love."

paul groans – at you or the sun, you aren't sure, but the grumble that vibrates in his chest sounds a little like a frustrated whine, and you have to hold back another giggle. despite his sweet looks, he's a grumpy little thing in the morning; a fact you know better than anyone else. "not fair," he huffs. his accent is always a little stronger, a little thicker when he's just woken up, paired with the very melodious and dramatic tone he often uses which always manages to bring out a smile on your lips. "'m really tired..."

you hum in response. it wasn't too long ago that you both finally fell asleep, after all. when he lets out a sigh and finally opens his eyes, your heart skips a beat. or two. or five.

paul's eyes are your favorite things in the world.

they always have been. since the moment they first met yours, you haven't been able to look away. it's not just a common blue – one day, they've stolen the deep color of the ocean, and the next, they've mimicked the light blue sky of a sweet summer day.

they're especially hard to tear your gaze from since they remind you of so many things you love. the waves by the sea you used to visit when you were younger; the dark rain clouds covering the sky during a cozy storm; blueberry-flavored candy, blue raspberry sour patch kids, bubblegum cotton candy. sometimes even a purple nebula, giving birth to butterflies in your stomach instead of stars in space.

even half-lidded like this, sleep still clear in his gaze, his eyes are enough to send goosebumps all across your skin. the effect he has on you is just not fair.

"how are you even already so awake?" he questions, his tone complaining as if there's a personal vendetta against you not being as sleep-deprived as him. you shake your head, letting go of his hand to instead let yours graze his cheek.

"i've been awake for a while now," you say, watching as he pushes his head against your hand like a cat seeking physical attention, letting out a soft hum when your hand slips past his jaw and lands on the back of his neck.

"doing what?" he raises an eyebrow, albeit clumsily as he's still too tired to control his face properly.

his arm drapes over your waist, his large hand finding the small of your back before lazily tracing up and down your spine. "watching you."

"i can't tell if that's kinky or only creepy."

you scoff, tone growing defensive. "how would that be kinky?"

"i never know with you." paul gently pulls you closer so that you're flush against his chest, making it easier for him to bury his face into the crook of your neck. he inhales slowly, drinking in your scent, before letting out a sigh, his exhale tickling the bare skin of your collarbone. "you still smell of me, you know."

"wouldn't be surprised if the whole room smells of us..." his lips begin a journey upwards, trailing kisses all the way from the sensitive skin between your shoulder and collarbone to the underside of your jaw, before stopping to nibble on your earlobe. his callused palm caresses the skin of your naked back, before sliding down to your ass, squeezing it gently.

your eyes close again, body basking in the feeling of his lips and hands working in perfect synchronization. despite how awake you said you were, it's far too early for wherever this is headed. you call out his name once, then twice, but the sole difference is that his hand moves down to trail along your thighs.

the only thing you can think of is tilting your head down to meet his lips, your toes curling at the passion with which he's kissing you so even early in the morning. his tongue is already begging for access to your mouth, fingertips grazing the inside of your thighs and leaving you squirming under his touch.

it's all so perfect, exactly like it always is; with him pressed up so close not even a single atom could fit between you, with you finding no reason not to give in.

hips pressed against hips, chests against chests, mouths against mouths. your favorite place, your favorite feeling,

your favorite person.

[armpirate]

Bittersweet || San

Bf experience

pairing: Idol!Choi San x fem!reader

w.c.: 6.2k

Warnings: fluff, a bit of angst, smut, rough sex, oral sex (female receiving), masturbation (female receiving), unprotected sex, breast play, dirty talk. (Minors DNI! Refrain from reading if you're not +18, and ignore if you don't like this type of content).

Summary: After some change of plans at work forced him to stood you up for your birthday, your boyfriend comes up with sometimes to make up for it.

Aprox. time of reading: 26 minutes

MASTERLIST

San looked at the empty dinner table where a few petals left were lying, and that a few hours back were part of the decoration along with some dishes filled with food. He didn't dare to step inside the kitchen and fridge, because he knew it would be filled with all the food he had ordered, and that birthday cake he managed to buy a day before everything escaped his control.

The plan was easy: order all of your favorite food, buy your favorite cake, and be at home on time so he could celebrate his favorite person's birthday. But instead, the recordings took longer than they should have, and one problem came after the other.

You kept insisting throughout the week how it wasn't necessary for him to do all that for you, and how you could postpone that celebration to a more peaceful time. But it was enough to see your smile attempting to break your concerned expression for him to know he needed to be there for you. He was also sure that, the same way you tried to convince him to save it up for another time, you'd say it was alright when he stepped inside your bedroom and joined you in the bed.

It was always like that. His work got in the way of your relationship, and your first words were "It's okay", when he indeed knew it wasn't okay.

It was of no help how you stayed at home, instead of spending your birthday with your friends, because he assured you he'd be just "a bit late". Not only did he felt like he ruined the dinner, he felt guilty by making you sit there by yourself while you waited for something that would never happen, at least not that night.

"Food won't show up as much as you think about it" you joked behind him.

San turned to you as soon as he heard your voice, momentarily distracted by how good you looked wearing one of his gray hoodies, exposing your bare thighs and walking around like the treat he knew he didn't deserve.

"I didn't hear you enter" you added, walking to him.

For nights like that one, you gave San your code. It was comfortable, and it was also a special show of affection and trust. But it also gave him the possibility to spoil you with something as simple as going to sleep all alone, and feeling warmed by his embrace after you woke up in the middle of the night -or seeing his face the first thing in the morning when a few hours back you didn't think you'd see him.

Although that night you waited for him. You stayed in bed, scrolling through TikTok and social media, just to pretend to be asleep when he stepped inside the room and snuggled next to you, surrounding your waist carefully so as not to wake you up. You started to think you'd fall asleep before he even showed up, and that was why you got up for a glass of water, forcing yourself to stay up.

And that was when you saw him.

The living room was only lit by the two hanging lamps over the dinner table, making your boyfriend the focus of the whole place. The side on San's body that was looking at the table was bathed by the warm light, while the other half stayed in the dark, making his figure even thicker and wider by the contrast of lights.

"I tried to be careful. I didn't want to wake you up" he answered, turning to you at the same time his arms slightly opened for you.

Your hands moved around his tiny waist, ascending to his side under the black bomber. His arms instantly enclosed around you, trapping you in a gentle but safe grip you didn't want to get away from in a really long time.

As his hands moved over your nape and spine, he could feel each one of your muscles relaxing under his touch, even he could feel the weight of your head a bit heavier on his chest as you snuggled against him.

"How was your day? I bet you're tired" your voice sounded muffled, but you didn't move a single millimeter to make it sound clearer, you were too hooked on his woody scent.

San dropped a sigh, moving his hand up inside the locks of your hair "It was nothing special" he assured. "I recorded my parts earlier today, I went to work out, I rehearsed for a bit. And when I was getting my things ready to leave, they told me I had to record my parts again because there were some issues" he softly explained, never stopping the gentle movements of his fingers on your scalp. "How was your day?".

You simply shrugged, hiding your face deeper in his chest as you remembered your shift had nothing special that day. You did your daily tasks as usual, and finished them around the same time as well. And apparently your boss kept track of your personal schedule as much as you did, because he called you into his office as soon as you thought about picking up your phone to answer some texts. Being offered the promotion you were waiting for wasn't on your plans for the day, and being explained what it consisted of -aware of how your boss had thought of you enough to bother explaining every detail of that new position-, or what would be the changes you'd need to face.

"It was good. It's actually been better after I talked to you about it and how I felt" you admitted, sighing. "And you won't believe it, but they offered me the promotion".

San pushed you carefully, just enough to be able to look at your face as his eyes widened with the good news.

"You're saying it as if it was the most normal thing".

"It is the most normal thing" you giggled. "Besides, I don't really want to talk about it right now".

Your face was hidden back in his chest as your arms wrapped around him tight. You didn't think that it wasn't important, or that it wasn't big. You just didn't want to make the mood even heavier by ranting about the pros and cons that would come with the promotion.

"I missed you so much" your voice sounded muffled again, making him chuckle.

Unlike other times, you were able to see each other quite frequently. It was the positive thing of that time between comebacks and tours: he was still busy, but he was able to be around whenever he was done. Whether it was by the way he sneaked inside your room, or how you cuddled on the couch when he happened to have a day off.

"You saw me yesterday" he tried to knock some sense into your comment, instantly getting a squinted look from you.

"So you mean you didn't miss me?".

"Of course I did. I miss you every minute" he pulled you in for a hug again.

You moved back, only a little bit to look up at him, standing on your tiptoes to be able to link your lips together. Your hands moved from his waist to his shoulders, holding onto the neck of his bomber to be able to keep your balance -it didn't matter though, because San's hands were firmly holding you, resting on your lower back.

"Let's go to sleep" you broke the kiss first, taking every remaining of his saliva from your lips as you moved your tongue over them. "You must be tired".

Your clumsy step was interrupted by the grip of his fingers around your wrist, pulling you closer to his body suddenly as he scrunched down to lift your body and carry you like a bride, making you rushed to cover your lips with your palms as you felt a scream aiming up your throat by the sudden movement.

Resisting San and his charms was something that would never be in your plans. One small gesture, like picking you up to take you to bed, had you giggling against the curve of his neck and looking at him with eyes full of love.

He left you on the bed carefully, leaning over the mattress until you were back inside of the only space that wasn't covered by the blanket, silently growling as he stood back up. San couldn't help but smile when you quickly covered your body, only leaving half of your face out to look at him with smiley eyes.

"I'll put the pajamas on and I'll be right back" he let you know, caressing in between your eyebrows with his thumb before he stepped back from the bed.

When he opened the closet, his sleeping clothes were folded in the same place where you always left them after you had cleaned them. He had brought three different pajamas for whenever he spent the night with you, but you knew that white t-shirt and those plaid pants were his favorite. That was why they were always on the top.

San didn't take long to join you on the bed, dragging your body until you were lying on his side, surrounded by his arms, backed up by his body, and with his chin hooked on your shoulder.

"I'm sorry for today" he whispered once the sound of the sheets and your giggles were over, breathing heavily as he dropped that apology that he was sure wouldn't be enough.

"You shouldn't be sorry" you answered back. "We can celebrate it tomorrow. It's not like you did it on purpose".

"I didn't. But I promised you I'd be here, and I didn't".

"So I'm cuddling with a hologram?" you joked.

That was what he loved the most about you, and what it made him hate himself and be sure that he wouldn't ever deserve you. He was the one supposed to cheer you up for messing up that day, and instead it was you the one trying to make him feel better and taking the blame off his shoulders.

The tip of your fingers moved over the arm that you were using as a pillow, trying to reassure him that you meant your words. He wouldn't ever do anything on purpose to hurt you, you knew that, and seeing him having a hard time over something that was out of his control was hurting you.

You finally sighed, rolling over your body to face him, placing your palm over his cheek.

"This is like the trip story all over again. I know I'd probably react the same way you do if I were in your position, but I cannot make you feel guilty over missing dinner. You bought the food, you bought the cake... I know if it had been your choice, you'd have spent the whole day with me" your words sounded calm and soft. "Getting mad at you over this would be unfair".

And would only add more pressure and guilt on him.

"I'm just worried you might think you aren't my main priority" he finally admitted it.

"If I weren't, you wouldn't be feeling bad right now. And you'd probably be making up excuses" your thumb rubbed against his cheek.

You had another answer about being his main priority, assuring him that it didn't matter if his dream came before you, because you knew how much he fought to be where he was. But you didn't say it. You knew San would rant about how you shouldn't ever accept being the second priority of someone, not even if it was him, because you were more important and special than anything else. Last time you dared to say something like that, he stayed on the topic for almost two hours, until you finally nodded and promised him you wouldn't accept to be the second place in anyone's life.

"But..."

"If you say anything else after that 'but', I'll make you sleep on the couch" you warned him.

His lips disappeared in his mouth as he tried to keep himself from saying everything that was going on inside his head. Your proud smile helped move those thoughts away, to the surprise of no one, wrapping his arms around you to glue your bodies together in a warm hug.

"I love you so much, babe" he said, looking down at you.

"I love you, too".

You moved your body up a little, just enough to be able to link your lips together in a short and small peck. When you both were supposed to move back into the hug, you two also moved your faces forward to go for another kiss. A short kiss that slowly turned into a passionate one between some licks and sucking into each other's lips. Your fingers were messing with his hair, dragging him with you as you laid on your back.

While one of his hands supported your head, the other traveled over the curve of your hip, moving past the elastic of your panties to sneak inside the fabric of his hoodie. Your heavy breath, as you felt his digits digging further, almost interrupted your kiss. San smirked with that reaction, infecting you with his sensuality by just exchanging one look, before you dragged him back for another kiss.

His lips felt soft on yours, wishing you could kiss them for hours -and you probably would if only you could. Your body moved under his touch, trying to get closer to him as the tip of his fingers finally got to the curve of your breast. At the same time his mouth pulled from your lower lip, his fingertips dented on your tit, getting your back to slightly arch. Your nipple tightened under his palm, weak to the friction of his skin against yours. The combination of his fingers massaging your scalp, his tongue diving into your mouth and his palm going down your belly again were blurring your mind.

You could only think of him and the way he made you feel. So wanted and loved you even doubted it was even a real feeling.

A hum escaped your lips, and your legs undirectly spread, when his fingers moved past the elastic of your panties, sliding his fingers over your clit and sliding them through your slid over your panties.

"Let me make up for today, hmm?"

You were so focused on how deep his voice sounded after breaking the kiss, and how his lips looked shiny and moist, that your brain wasn't able to put two words together that could make sense. Slowly, you nodded.

San showered your face with kisses, giving small pecks on every corner he didn't pay attention to, while his hands started to lift his hoodie, slowly exposing your skin under the blankets, taking off the fabric with your help. His tongue moved down your throat, forcing you to throw your head back by the involuntary way your body reacted to him, topping it with a kiss on your chin.

He kept spreading with open-mouthed kisses over your torso, moving down to your cleavage and changing his position as he kissed the space in between your breasts. His knee was strategically positioned in between your legs, offering you something to rub yourself against when you couldn't take it anymore. San knew how sensitive your nipples were, and he wasn't surprised by the way your body squirmed with the soft kisses he laid on the two of them.

Just like he expected, your hips didn't take long to bounce against his leg, grinding against the fabric of his pants at the same time his tongue twirled around your hard button. When you looked down, you could only see the curtain his bangs had formed, and his nose peeking over them as it rubbed against your skin every time he went down to trap your nipple in between his lips.

Your clit throb every time his tongue moved over the tip, causing your hips to grind a bit harder against his leg. He was putting you in such a delicate state that you were sure you'd be able to cum by doing that only.

As he held you, San could sense it, too. Your muscles tensed with every move you made, your breathing was starting to be irregular and you were barely able to keep your hands still as the both of them gripped on his t-shirt.

A groan vibrated through your chest when he found your panties drenched in your arousal as he replaced his leg with his fingers, moving them in circles on your clit over your underwear. With every loud breath that hinted the start of those moans that always gifted his ears, a camouflaged moan came out, encouraging him to add his teeth every time he pulled from your nipple. That slightly mix of pain and pleasure stole the first moan of the night.

"Babe, I'm gonna cum" you warned him, feeling your pussy clenching around nothing as it desperately seeked for him.

Instead of getting him to stop and fuck you, San sneaked his hand inside your panties, earning a whine from you when his fingers met your swollen clit, keeping the same pace as he was following seconds back.

Your skin was burning with every move he made from one side to the other, and your jaw was clenched as you tried to keep those sounds to yourself. It was so impressive how he was always able to drive you insane like it was the first time and make your body melt in his embrace as he carried you through your orgasm.

He moved his hand away carefully, kneeling in front of you and causing the blankets to fall behind his body. How he moved in front of you caused you to support yourself on your elbows, getting a full vision of what he was going to do.

What you didn't know was that seeing you in that position was probably the most erotic image he could've ever thought of. His cock twitched inside his boxers, asking for that attention that he wouldn't give to it until he was done with you.

Your hips lifted at the same time his fingers hooked on the elastic of your panties, helping him take them off.

Just like San did with your upper body, he started a trail of kisses from your ankle to your knee. He gave you one fast look, giving you a smirk, as his lips moved past the joint. His kisses were so sweet and chaste, and his hands were holding you so attentively, that contrasted hardly with what was about to happen.

Your eyes never left him, as tortured as you felt when he kissed around your folds, as needy you felt when your hips instinctively lifted to his mouth. He had your full attention, and he loved being the focus of it.

"Hmm" you hummed, licking your lips he finally kissed you over your wet slit.

In an attempt to make him more comfortable, you widened the space in between your legs. And that also worked as a sign that you wanted more from him, that you craved way more than what he was offering you.

You could feel every single hair of your body rising when he slid the tip of his tongue from your entrance to your clit, getting a first taste of you. His tongue twirled around your clit, getting you ready, moving so slowly that you thought he was trying to torture you rather than prepare you.

Your fists closed, grabbing the sheets underneath you when his mouth pulled from your bundle of nerves, letting go of it with a loud sound before he took it back in between his lips again.

He always took his time whenever he went down on you, exploring every millimeter he hadn't explored, taking you to the edge and leaving you hanging for a bit more because he just loved when you surrendered to pleasure, enjoying each and every single one of your reactions as his tongue toyed with you. He was in love with how vocal you were, and how receptive you always showed yourself in front of him.

"You taste so good, babe" he mumbled, sinking his lips back in your slit.

His hands cupped your ass cheeks, lifting your hips and forcing your legs over his shoulders, caging his head in between them. Something shifted in his movements when he changed you to that position, and you could feel it on the way he held onto your flesh. He kept flicking his tongue on your clit, suddenly stopping to move his flat tongue over it. San repeated that same movement a few times, taking his time at first, and slowly moving his head up and down a bit faster, pressing a bit harder to get you to hold onto the sheets as if you'd escape your body at any given time.

His face moved lower on you, enough to be able to slide his tongue inside you, making your whole body wake up at the sudden invasion. At first he just slid it in and out, testing you and seeing your reflection, but soon it was as deep as it physically was able to, causing his nose to rub against your clit while he moved his face to the sides.

You reached to his hair, moving his bangs back, a bit too back to have a few locks falling back over his forehead and forcing you to pull them back again to be able to see his eyes as he ate you out, taking every drop of arousal that kept leaking from you because of him. His kitten gaze made such a huge contrast on what he was doing to you and how he was making you feel that you thought you'd be going crazy.

You were holding onto his locks as if your life depended on it, pushing his head a bit deeper into your core, feeling the friction of the tip of his nose against your clit got a bit more intense. You were losing yourself to him, and he loved watching you take everything he had to offer you, shameless to show off how good he was making you feel with those cracked moans that went straight to his cock.

The second orgasm didn't take much longer to fall upon you like a ray, going through your body from head to toe.

While you tried to recover from your high, San made his way up to your lips, kissing every bit of skin that was on the way until he was finally where he wanted to be. You could feel how big and thick he had become once he laid on top of you, lifting your hips to acknowledge the bulge before he kissed you with a smirk. You could your own taste mixed with his saliva as he twirled his tongue around yours, and just that sensory push was enough to feel your juices dripping down your core again.

"Does my girl want more?" he purred in between kisses.

"I always want more of you" you assured him, licking his lower lip. "Why don't you take it all off and fuck me like you're dying to do?".

He pecked the bridge of your nose, stepping out of the bed to get rid of all of his clothes, making your mouth water at the sight of his cock ready to split you open.

All those dirty thoughts were eclipsed by your clumsy boyfriend almost falling when he kicked the pants and his boxers away, before jumping back on the bed, making the whole mattress bounce with him.

"Desperate much?" you teased him back.

"Yes" he nodded, placing himself in between your legs. "So much I think I'm actually obsessed with you and how good you feel wrapped around me".

Your lip was trapped under your teeth, that tightened their pressure when San's tip pushed against your entrance to slowly slide inside with a gentle thrust. His fingers squeezed the skin behind your knees when he was completely in, trying to make sure you were okay. It was his way to tell you he was waiting for your approval to start moving.

Your hips lifted right after, giving him that sign he was waiting for. His thrusts started as slow and deep, letting you feel every inch spreading you out, every vein rubbing against your insides. He leaned over you, stealing a kiss from your lips, completely drunk by the way you took him in so easily.

"Move a bit faster, love" you asked

He changed the speed while resting his forehead on yours, almost drinking up all the quiet moans that left your lips and floated in between you.

You frowned when he moved back up again, only to change the position of your legs. He put them together, lifting them up to his shoulders before he slid back inside and moved back down to your face.

That new position made it impossible for you to control the loud moan that burned your throat as it escaped, feeling his tip hitting deeper with every thrust.

"Does it feel better this way?" he growled against your lips. "Fuck, I can feel how you squeeze me in so tight".

"Uh-hum" you whined. "You feel so big".

Your eyes rolled to the back when he changed the speed again, going a bit faster and making your skin clap with every thrust. The plead in them was driving him crazy, contacting with his most animalistic side as you begged for more.

"Sannie, babe..." you started mumbling after a few minutes, holding onto the wrists that were on both sides of your head. "I want to ride you".

His pounds lost power and speed, until he was completely still inside of you. He pulled out, letting go of your legs and moving back to lie next to you. With his help, you straddled his lap, placing your needs on each side of his hips.

One hand was positioned on your thigh, caressing your skin delicately, while the other was placed on your hip to help you move up before you started sliding down his cock.

It started at a normal pace, getting used to that new position and angle. Your hand rested on his lower belly, while the other reached for his arm for some stability. San needed more of it though, he needed to feel completely connected to you in every aspect. His arm moved under your grip, and next you knew his hand was holding yours tightly as you started bouncing on top of him.

Sense started to vanish as your whole body started moving. Having the curves of your body on full display, as you took control of his pleasure made him feel in a way he couldn't explain. Your tits bounced in sync with your movements, instantly making him aware of the thin coat of weat that started to cover you after a few minutes.

You got a short break after your legs started feeling sore, only rocking your hips back and forwards. It was a moment you both used to tease each other, linking your eyes and tempting with your smirks, proud that the other was just as lost in the feeling as the other.

The only moment you let go of his hand was to lean over him, targeting his lips for a long kiss that added passion to the sudden arrhythmic movements of your hips. You took him in completely again, gasping against his mouth while he moved your hair back to be able to look at your face. And you were thankful to him for doing that, because you loved seeing the way his face distorted when you moved back up, clenching your walls around his tip before you moved back down.

"Shit, babe. Do that again" he asked with a needy voice.

You repeated the same movement. You actually did it a few more times, while your tongue traced his marked jaw and your lips sucked on the freckles on his neck.

The teasing wasn't enough, you needed more. That was why you moved back up again, with both hands on his stomach while he held you tight by your thighs and hips. You started jumping on him, feeling his cock pull in and out with your moves, drunk by pleasure and addicted how you had that big man moaning and digging his nails on your flesh out of desperation.

"Please" he moaned out loud, and you didn't need him to say or do much more to know what he meant.

You didn't change the pace, you didn't change the angle or position. And although your legs were close to giving up, you still bounced like both of your lives depended on it. One stroke, two strokes... and he was gone. His cock twitched deep inside you as he spilled his warm seed with a loud moan.

Your movements didn't stop there though. You went back to the resting position, still feeling him hard deep in your guts, before you went back to bouncing back and forwards, but a lot faster that time and trying to be as glued to his body as possible. The room was soon filled with those wet noises that came from your pussy as you rocked your hips, mixed with the short but more frequent moans that escaped your lips by the friction of his cock on your walls and the feeling of his cum dripping down your cunt to his cock. San also helped you, positioning his hands firmly on your hips so you'd be able to get your clit to rub against his crotch and give you that little push you needed.

Your body collapsed on top of him as that last orgasm nearly ruined you. You stayed like that for a while, trying to recover as you caressed the other. San's fingers moved up and down your sweaty spine, while your tips traced his collarbone.

"Where did you learn to do that thing with your...?"

"Fanfics" you snorted.

"Hmm" he hummed, pretending he was thinking about it. "Maybe I should start reading them, what's your user?".

"Please don't" you giggled, suddenly lifting your head to look at him, moving your hands on each side of his head on the bed. "If you do start reading them, avoid mine".

Ever since he had known about that side of you, he had become more interested in knowing about it. And you wouldn't really mind... If you weren't deadly embarrassed over the idea of having your boyfriend reading about such detailed and weird ideas.

"You have no idea how lucky I feel to have you" he added with a more serious tone.

"I feel so lucky, too" your hands slowly moved over the pillow, until you were back at cupping his face. "Every single day. All the time. I'm thankful to be with you. And I'm not saying this because I was, and am, a fan..:"

"I know" he quickly nodded.

He remembered how nervous you actually were when you first told him about it, because you wanted him to know and choose whether to go on with the relationship. You understood he could've been creeped out over it, or even think that possibly what you felt wasn't genuine, but a cause of infatuation. But he knew it that same night. You took the time to spend quality time with him, to get to know him; and he was down bad for the beautiful person you were in and out.

Honestly, San even felt relief when you told him you were a fan and that he was your bias.

"You're really important to me" you squeezed his cheeks, making him smile at the moment.

"Let's go clean, shall we?" San suggested.

When he left the bathroom earlier after you cleaned, you thought he'd make his way to the bed. But when you stepped out, he wasn't there and neither were his clothes. Frowning, you put a pair of clean panties on and his hoodie back again.

As you stepped out of the room, you could see your boyfriend's smile in the dark, just to be lighted by the candle on the cake as soon as he was aware of your presence.

You stepped towards him as he sang the happy birthday song to you, moving the cake forward to your face as the song came to an end so you could blow the candles.

You didn't want that to ever end. That was your only wish.

"Grab a spoon. Let's eat some" he said, leaving the cake back on the table before he sat next to you.

It was a comfortable silence. The type of silence that made you sure you were with the right person. No pressure, no worries. It was just him and his company, and you thought that would be enough to solve all the problems that could come in your direction.

"Like I told you, they offered me the promotion" you suddenly said.

"Oh yes. What happened to that? What did your boss tell you?" his eyebrows lifted in surprise, while his lips curved up in excitement.

"He said I was the first person he thought of as soon as the opportunity showed up. And they gave me some time to think about my answer" you scooped your spoon in the cake to get another bite.

"Are you playing hard to get?" his tone sounded funny.

And it probably would've made you smile if you didn't know the reason why you agreed on thinking about it for a while.

"It's in the States".

You could feel his mood suddenly changing. That smile that you were able to feel disappeared, his leg stopped moving. He was completely freezed.

"Apparently they don't have vacancies in Seoul for the position I'd be promoted to, but they need someone to fill the vacancy in the headquarters in the US".

That knot in your throat showed up again, giving you a hard time not to start crying when you were aware of his concerned expression.

Earlier that evening, you were thankful San sent a text telling you he wouldn't make it to the dinner. You knew you wouldn't have been able to hide that for long, and it'd probably have ruined the mood he wanted to create for your birthday.

You were in a delicate situation. It didn't matter what you chose, neither of the options gave you the chance to stay in Seoul. If you rejected the offer, you'd only postpone moving out a few months, at least until your contract expired. And there was a small chance they'd renew it for the position you were doing then, and stay in Korea for a little longer. But also, if you took the offer, there was always the possibility to come back to that new position as soon as there was a vacancy.

Your head was back at the mess it was hours back.

"Can I give you my opinion?" he whispered.

You quickly nodded, just wanting to hug him and make the sadness that was coming out of his eyes disappear.

"You took the courses to form yourself for the position, you have the experience and the talent. You should take the offer".

Of course San said that. He had been the first one encouraging you to do what you wanted to do. He had also been your first support when you had breakdowns because you thought you were stagnant professionally wise.

He was your main supporter.

San's first thought, when you told him where the job was, was how he'd be able to survive having you so far away from him. His heart was starting to ache just with the idea. But of course he wouldn't ever show how hurt he could be about that, or how it affected him, because he didn't want to be the reason you gave up on something you worked so much for. He just couldn't show any hint of his pain, because he knew it'd affect your choice. The fact that you came up to him with the doubt, instead of coming with the decision, was enough evidence that his opinion was as important as yours on the matter.

"I don't want to be so far" your voice trembled with those final words.

San quickly dragged his chair closer to yours, wrapping his arms around you to hug you tight.

"I'll be with you wherever you are" he assured. "I promise there will be no difference. We'll have video calls every day, we'll text all the time. And I'll go to see you every time I have the chance. We will make it work".

It was such a bittersweet feeling. You were encouraged by his words, endeared by how he was willing to fight for your relationship even if you were away. But it was such an awful feeling that he had to say that because of something that involved you and that, at the same time, was out of your control. 

[writtenbymisunderstoodnerds]

Unconditionally, uncontrollably, undoubtedly (Rose Lavelle x Reader)

So it's been a really long, stressful few weeks, I lost my motivation/energy to write. However, I'm lucky enough to be in the same time zone as the world cup which has definitely given my motivation back. With my upcoming holiday and moving, sorry to say this is probably going to be the last fic I post for at least a month.

First time writing for Rose, hope you enjoy :)

Words: 1.1K

Between media, training, recovery and exploring with the girls, it had been an incredibly long week. You would think with how exhausted I was, sleep would be coming easy, but it wasn't. I missed sleeping next to my girlfriend. Knowing she was only a few doors down didn't help. Of course Rose and I still spent time with each other, it just wasn't as much. Tiredness and missing my girlfriend turned into grumpiness which became obvious to the team at training when I practically ignored everyone or gave one word answers. Even to Rose. 

Once training had ended, I skipped team bonding deciding to go float in the pool instead. It was relaxing and I knew no one would look for me there except maybe Rose. After maybe half an hour there was a disturbance in the water making me look over to find Rose crouching down next to the pool.

"Hey."

I swam over, leaning up to peck her lips, "Hey yourself."

"Glad to see you're not mad at me."

"Sorry about today, I was just grumpy in general not at anyone in particular."

"I noticed, everyone noticed actually. Do you want to come watch a movie in my room with me?"

"Can't promise I'll last a whole movie but I would love that. Let me go shower quickly and get changed, I'll meet you there?"

"Deal."

When Rose opened the door, I was met with a dim room lit only by fairy lights and the TV. There were flowers lying on the bedside table, my favourite pasta and chocolate waiting on the table. Rose stood next to me, playing with her fingers as a nervous smile appeared. It was understandable. While I had never really snapped at Rose because I was tired, I hated doing stuff when I was this exhausted. Preferring to either just watch tv or go to sleep with very little conversation. However, at this point I would do pretty much anything to spend time with Rose. My heart fluttered at the fact she had done this for me. I wrapped my arms around her, kissing the top of her head. "What's all this?"

"You get grumpy when you're tired or stressed. I know we haven't had a lot of time together and like me you're probably struggling to sleep. So I thought we were overdue for a date night. I know you don't li-"

"I love it Rose. I love you. You know me too well."

She smiled proudly, kissing my cheek, "I love you Y/n. Coach gave us permission to have a sleep over tonight since tomorrows an off day. He also said he doesn't mind if we do it more often as long as it's only on days off. "

"Really?"

"Really. When I said everyone noticed your grumpiness, I meant everyone."

"Thank you Rosie. I really needed this."

"I know. So did I."

Rose picked up the flowers, holding them out to me, "These are for you."

"They're beautiful, I love them. Thank you."

Rose took my hand, leading me over to the table. She had lit a few candles, spread a few rose petals over the table and set the table nicely with my favourite pasta, some garlic bread and a wine glass of cranberry juice. Maybe odd combination, but it was my favourite. I cupped Roses cheek, kissing her with as much love and passion as I could. I loved this girl more than I ever thought was possible. 

When we had first started seeing each other, I wasn't really that into her. She was nice enough, she just wasn't my type. My friend had set us up and really wanted me to at least try, claiming that we had a lot in common. It turns out the only real thing we had in common was our love for dogs and soccer, but Rose had actually been interested in hearing about my interests and learning more about them. It had been a long time since anyone was so interested try some of their hobbies from time to time what I was saying so despite not being into her, I had agreed to a second then a third date. To this day, 6 years later, that was the best decision I had ever made. The more we saw each other, the more I fell for her. Now I couldn't imagine my life without her. Turns out you don't need a lot in common with someone to be with them, you just need to be willing to listen.

After eating, we just sat and talked for a while. Something that we hadn't had much time for over the last few weeks. It was the most I had been able to relax since the world cup started. I knew there was still a long way to go, there would be more sleepless nights, less time together and stress, but it felt like a weight had been lifted and I could breathe again. 

One of Rose's favourite songs started playing quietly from my phone, making her smile widely. I held my hand out, Rose quickly taking it without hesitation. I spun her around, giggles spilling out as my arm wrapped around her waist, the other still holding her hand. Rose looped her arm around my shoulder, pecking my lips quickly. "You don't like dancing."

"Maybe not, but here, with you, it's my second favourite thing in the world."

"Second? What's the first?"

"You. No matter how many dogs we may get, it will always be you. 6 years ago, I made the best decision of my life when I agreed to go out with you. You've changed my life in a way I never expected. I can't imagine a day where I don't get to see your smile, hear your laugh or your voice. I look forward to the day when there's no more travel or nights apart, where we wake up and go to sleep together every single day. Those are my favourite times of the day, no matter what the day will or has brought, they never fail to bring a smile to my face. This isn't how I planned to do this. Actually, I didn't have a plan, all I knew was it would happen sometime during the world cup when the time was right. There's never been a time that's felt more right than now."

I pulled out the ring that had been accompanying me everywhere we went for the last month or so, just waiting for the right time. A hand covered her mouth, the other clutching mine. I dropped down to one knee, only letting go of her hand for a second to open the box before finding it again. 

"Unconditionally, uncontrollably, undoubtedly, I love you Rose Lavelle. Will you marry me?"

Rose fell onto her knees in front of me, holding me tightly, warm drops falling against my neck, "Yes, yes I'll marry you. What is it you said? Unconditionally, uncontrollably, undoubtedly, I love you Y/n Y/l/n." 

[l0verb0t]

dick grayson × gn reader. | breakfast date.

SUMMARY: a fic about taking dick out to a cafe early in the morning. WARNINGs: minor physical contact, && food. WORD COUNT: 2100+ NOTEs: second person && no plot. this insert is more of a blunt, concerned type. [gentlemen && guy, and no pronouns used to refer to the insert/reader.]

His back hurts, it's still cold as hell, and he's pretty sure he sprained something after last night, but at least he could deal with walking with you to a cafe, pain aside. Luckily, you didn't ask about how slow he was being. He's always able to catch up fast enough.

You knew well about the cold problem, though, because Dick keeps complaining about it.

Shame on you for asking him if he wanted to get breakfast in the morning, apparently.

Another night out left him tending to his bruises until the early sunrise. He made up for the lack of rest by passing out in it for a good few hours until the ringing from his phone finally woke him up to the bright light beaming through his curtains.

He spent a good amount of time groaning in his sheets as he let the pain settle in until he got used to it.

Some greetings were thrown back and forth, and then you went on talking about some cafe. It was close enough, and it sounded nice based on your experience. He just had to keep himself from falling back into unconsciousness as he listened, trying to give a hum every time you asked something.

But it's not like you knew. You know who he is; he just doesn't talk much about his outings. The concern gets in the way sometimes, crowds his thoughts.

Instead of saying anything about it, he's busy talking about the weather instead. He knows it might come up.

He knew what he was getting himself into, too. He didn't force himself to come; he just wanted to spend an afternoon with you. It beats sleeping in all day again.

That, and you offered to pay the bill. Apparently, it's cheap enough and has a breakfast section.

The weather is nice in Blüdhaven for a change, with a simple snowstorm overhead that's been going on for nearly a week. Highlights along the streets that the two of you pass by.

Despite how hard he's shivering, he manages to call out to you. "Do you think it's going to get worse?"

He nearly doesn't hear you through the rubbing of fabrics; he hears about everyone else on the crowded walkways, almost bumping into someone at every turn as he follows you.

"What is?"

"The snow." He puts his focus ahead rather than making sure he doesn't trip, and he sees you scrolling through something on your phone. "Barely been a few days, and it's up to my boots."

He takes the chance to get up closer. "I think I preferred when it was just cold."

"It's not that bad."

You walk up ahead of him, and he jogs immediately after.

Dick keeps his head down so he doesn't have to deal with the snow pelting him in the face. So he doesn't lose you in a crowd, he follows your shoes and just hopes he doesn't bump into anyone else on the way there. Your hand is right there, but he stops himself from doing anything.

He just rambles on to distract himself. "Speak for yourself. I'm going to freeze in a couple minutes."

"Drama king." Your phone gets shoved back into your pocket. "Just live for a little while longer; we're almost there."

He knows you can't see it, but he still smiles at you.

He copies you and stuffs his hands into his jacket. The cold only serves to irritate the bruised skin along the knuckles. You're going to see them eventually; he ran out of bandages.

And you were right; it wasn't far.

It took around half an hour walking through a mini-snowstorm to get to the place. Dick brings himself to look up for a moment, catching something along the lines of, "Coffee and Co." on the sign along the front before he's getting pulled along inside by his sleeve.

The door is kept open for him, and he mutters something about you being a gentleman, but he can't bring himself to talk too loud as he gets hit in the face with a cold breeze.

Dick follows you in without complaint, letting you pull at it to the point where that one arm is back outside the jacket. Immediately, he rubs his nose with the sleeve. He makes a mental note to order something warm, just so he doesn't risk having to go out while sick again.

He drags his shoes against the rug at the entrance and then looks around at the dark and dim tones carrying along the interior. It's a nice change of pace from the bright white piling up outside.

Even the lamps above are a much softer yellow, but that doesn't matter much as the light blaring out through the windows covers every corner throughout the cafe.

People are strewn about, taking up most of the seating, that the only few tables left are all the way in the back. At least he can drape himself along the cushioned chairs.

Dick gets patted on the back and can only bring himself to laugh off the gentle contact before he pushes himself further in.

He's taken to a table, and he pulls out a chair for himself.

And then he's staring right back at you, and now he feels like he walked all the way here just to look like a mess.

He doesn't know what to call the two of you, just that whatever it is, he still wants to look nice for you.

Instead, he was too tired earlier to care. When it came time to meet up with you, he ran around his apartment, picking off his suit to switch with anything he could find that seemed presentable enough. He doesn't remember if he even brushed his teeth, so he keeps his mouth shut as he smiles back.

With a small table between the two of you, he's seated right across. He tries to keep to his side as he props his arms along the rim, leaning against it. There isn't too much space, as a good half of it is covered in stands and condiments.

"This place looks nice, right?"

He can't help but stare at you as he mutters back. "Very pretty."

You flip through one of the stands on the back and take out two menus. One gets placed right over his arms, opened so he can look through the first two pages. They're both lists of the different kinds of beverages they have.

He barely skims through them before picking off something that has caffeine.

It probably won't be enough to help him through the rest of the day, but maybe your little hangout will end before that, and he can just crash on his couch for the rest of it.

You have to snap him out of it a couple times, slowly pulling him out of the exhaustion crowding his head, and he can barely tell you what he wants.

"Is that it?"

He nods, and instantly he's told, "You need something to eat, Dick."

He has to push himself up from his position just so he can flip through the menu just as quickly as before. He doesn't know if he can stomach much, so he goes with a couple muffins and scrambled eggs just so you won't pick up on anything. It's enough, he thinks.

You push yourself back from the table, and your chair screeches against the floor for a moment.

And he takes the moment to rub his eyes. It doesn't matter that he can hear almost everyone from where he's sitting; he's slept through worse.

He watches as you head over to the counter. No one was in line, so you went right onto the orders to a cashier standing at it.

After everything was accounted for, he was about to open his wallet and get up before he saw you open yours first.

Right, something about paying.

When you sit back down, silence overtakes your guys' space again. It just makes Dick uncomfortable, despite the atmosphere.

He drags a hand down his face to keep himself from trailing off again, and he takes the plunge to try and make conversation, quiet as he talks.

"So." His fingers begin tapping against the wood in a repetitive pattern as he draws out the silence. "How's life been treating you?"

"Good."

"Great." His head nearly hits the table as he lets it drop while he's left to fill the silence again.

It feels like a mercy when you do it instead. "Are you okay?"

He rests his head against a hand as he props up an elbow on the table, staring back at you all the while. Nothing intelligible comes out on the first try, so he shuts his mouth real quick before trying again.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Well—could be better." He takes in a deep breath and holds back a sigh. "But I'm fine."

"You look tired."

He almost regrets even trying to start up a conversation, but it wasn't like you wouldn't pick up on it eventually. You didn't need to be a detective.

"Yeah, you know work."

He knows you're staring at him still, even after he's turned away to look at the table. At the very least, he's slowly becoming conscious enough that he isn't toppling over anymore.

"You're allowed to have a life outside of work."

"I know." With his free hand, he gestures back to you. "I'm trying to. Right here."

It's not a lie. He doesn't think so; everything's just muddled.

Your voice doesn't help with it. It's probably one of the nicer things he's heard all week, even if it doesn't have much competition with the insults and yelling and screaming he's been getting from people while on the clock.

"You're not hurt or anything, are you?"

"No—" He takes in a sharp breath through his clenched jaw. "Yes. It's not that bad, though. Don't worry about it."

He interrupts you the second your mouth opens again.

"I promise."

"Could we get you checked out at a doctor later? Just in case." And before he can protest, you interrupt him just the same. "You—Blüdhaven needs you. At least through it, you can find out if you have a sprain or something, and be wary of that while going out."

He knows what you're trying to do, but he relents anyway.

"Okay. We can—can do it after this."

He smiles back to try and distance the conversation from the concern. The silence just makes him want to pass out until breakfast comes in even more.

"So," He groans, looking away as he tries to play into the awkwardness. "That weather, am I right?"

"Yeah, that weather." Before Dick can excuse himself to the restroom and wait it out there, he turns back to you when he hears a snort.

He shuts his eyes and leans into his hand more, muffling his own voice. "You're really not giving me much to work with here."

"Sorry." He's about to bring up the checkup when you continue. "You know I care about you, right?"

He doesn't even have to force the smile this time. "I know."

He can't bring himself to look back at you, though, and instead takes a deep breath before leaning back into his chair.

"I just want you to be okay."

"I'll try to be—"

A voice at the counter calls out for someone, an unfamiliar name. When Dick turns over to look, he sees a guy running up to grab a paper bag with the cafe's name on the front of it.

He watches them leave, just for your name to be called out right after, finding two plates on a tray.

He lets you get up to grab it. It's not like he's going to let you watch him limp over there.

One of the plates is immediately slid right over to him, his drink in some sort of plastic container.

Without waiting, he gives a quick, "Thank you."

And then he grabs a fork to stuff some of the food into his mouth. It burns for a second, so he just lets it settle as he chews slowly.

"You're welcome."

He uses the breakfast as an excuse to keep his gaze from yours, stress slowly overcoming the feeling of his stomach eating itself. He tries to push it down with another large spoonful while he grabs the ketchup.

The lid is popped open, and he holds it over the eggs. It barely misses the rest of his food as a ton plops down instantly.

"Great." Without more of a complaint, he stabs his fork into it.

He grabs his drink and tries to swallow down the taste of tomatoes, but nothing comes out.

He looks over the table and sees how you're actually drinking yours, and now he's thinking about how he's going to ask you how you opened the lid without sounding like an idiot.

Until then. "Is yours any good?"

"It's as sweet as you."

His smile grows wider as he makes sure not to laugh at you just for being sweet. Instead, he places a hand over one of yours.

"Ew."

[aroacewxs]

wxs and how they sleep

tsukasa

late, light sleeper. tired of seeing "tsukasa gets all his eight hours!" NO. HE DOES NOT. HE IS BARELY GETTING BY. HE IS RUNNING ON HOPES AND DREAMS AND SPITE AND HOPES AND DREAMS AND SPITE ONLY. he would chide everyone else around him to sleep early and rest up while he sleeps at 3 trying to perfect one line that is bothering him deeply to his core like an itch under your skin. sleeps on his back, that loser. HANDS FOLDED ACROSS HIS STOMACH TOO LMAOOOOOOO. i also feel like he would try sleeping on the floor after hearing that it's good for your back.

he starts the night on his back and his hands folded but he tosses and turns and wakes up on the floor twisted like a Baked Pretzel with unbearable neck pain and mystery bruises on his legs. he wakes up to the smallest bump in the night and takes ages to fall back asleep. at some point after staring up at his ceiling for an hour he decides that it's hopeless and reads up on theatre instead.

it is also canon he snores, so for the small amount of time he IS asleep, he's doing it very very loudly and obnoxiously

emu

early, deep sleeper. drools. the official Snrrkk Mimimi of wxs. emu is the type of person to have bubbles pop out of her nose when she snores. she literally has "z's" floating above her and escaping throughout her window and into the night sky when she sleeps. emu is the type of person to wake up to roosters going cock a doodle doo and leap out of her bed (with her blankets being made instantly in the process). sleeps on her side, cuddles with pillows and stuffies!

i also think emu would fall asleep very easily on any kind of vehicle if she wasn't excited about every little thing that happens on these rides. car? oh my god, look! cows! plane? are you kidding! she's literally airborne! what is there not to be excited about! boat? are you kidding! she's literally floating! what is there not to be excited about! and was that a fish???

it is also canon that she sleep talks. which is so fitting. she really is a cartoon character

nene

late, deep sleeper. sleep talker. sleeps on her side and occasionally on her stomach with one leg propped up, arms up as if she were surrendering to the police. nene falls victim to the 3-5pm eepiness every time, well knowing that she will not be able to sleep later when she's supposed to and ends up playing video games instead.

when she IS asleep though, nene is as still as a rock. you cannot move her. you cannot wake her up. if someone were to shake her awake, she'd be cranky all throughout breakfast. she has to slide out of bed, blankets wrapped around her body, and slowly make her way to the kitchen on her own accord with little bubbles popping around her head, all cartoon-esque.

rui

late, light sleeper. sleep talker. SLEEP LAUGHER. also has the weirdest dreams, some he itches to tell his friends and use as show inspiration, some leave him sitting there, half awake, wondering what the fuck he just dreamt as he blinks away the sleep in his eyes in dazed confusion.

his sleeping position is sitting, face smushed against blueprints on his desk. unfortunately. but if he were to actually drag himself to his garage couch or to his room (im pretty sure he has a bedroom, but doesn't go there because he spends so much time in his work room), he would free fall onto his face and sleep on his stomach and then wake up on his side or a weird twist of sorts.

[renecdote]

how about "this reminded me of you" if it sparks? <3

Hi Kate ily I hope you don't mind that I took some creative liberties with the dialogue here <3 It also got way longer than expected oops so enjoy 4.4k of these two being ridiculously in love.

Also for @starlingbite who requested the same prompt.

[Read on AO3]

The package shows up on the doorstep on Wednesday afternoon. Eddie is supposed to be at work—the last shift in the cycle before their four days off—but instead he kissed Buck goodbye at the door, made him promise not to do anything too dangerous, then stayed home to look after his sick kid. He’s expecting groceries when the doorbell rings just after five p.m., not the lumpy grey package left by a USPS driver who is already climbing into his truck and driving away.

Eddie skims the label as he shuts the door—sent to: Evan Buckley; description: boyfriend hoodie—curious because he doesn’t remember Buck mentioning anything he ordered recently. He doesn’t open it, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted. He pulls out his phone instead and types boyfriend hoodie into the search bar, only hesitating a moment before he hits enter. A dozen links pop up, but none of them are all that enlightening. Eddie is left with no clearer idea of what a boyfriend hoodie is and a vague disgust at how expensive they are to buy. He’s pretty sure that if Buck ever put together a budgeting spreadsheet it would look something like:

Food $200

Data $150

Rent $800

Hoodies $3,600

Utility $150

And Eddie knows he’s so, so far gone for his boyfriend. He knows he has been for a long time. But damn he’s got it bad because he knows that if Buck put a budget like that in front of him, he’d never be able to talk him out of spending a fortune on all his cosy, tempting hoodies.

The doorbell rings again, cutting into his thoughts, and Eddie leaves the package on the dining table to collect his groceries. Milk and eggs and the deli bacon Buck likes go in the fridge, oranges in the fruit bowl, crackers and pedialyte left on the table, everything else in the pantry. He checks on Chris—sleeping, no warmer than he was an hour ago when Eddie brushes a hand over his forehead—and somewhere between folding laundry and ladling chicken soup into a cup, the mystery of the package slips to the back of his mind.

****

Buck tries to sneak in when he gets home, but Eddie is dozing on the couch, half awake in case Chris needs him, and he hears the rumble of the Jeep’s engine before the door is unlocked.

“Hey,” he greets sleepily, “you’re early.”

He’s not really: it’s twenty past eight. Eddie is just so used to calls taking them overtime, or lingering in the station at the end of a shift, or the hell beast that is LA traffic in the mornings. Their shifts end at eight, but he rarely sees the inside of his house any earlier than eight forty-five.

“Hey,” Buck echoes, yawning. “Sorry, did I wake you?”

Eddie shakes his head, swallowing back his own yawn. “Nah, I’ve been up for a while.” Sort of up, anyway. “How was work?”

“Busy,” Buck answers. “I missed you.”

He looks tired, which means he probably didn’t get much sleep in the bunks. Hard to tell whether that was because of the busy or the I missed you though.

“How’s Chris?” he asks before Eddie can question him further. “Is he feeling any better?”

It hits Eddie sometimes, in the moments he least expects it, that he’s been coparenting with his best friend for far longer than either of them realised. Buck letting himself into the house, asking how Chris is when he’s been sick—none of it feels new. They could have had this conversation just as easily three years ago as they are today. The only difference is that now, after Eddie has reassured his partner that Chris seems to be on the upswing, he can tip his head back against the couch and Buck will lean down and kiss him; first on the forehead, then, when Eddie pouts upside down at him, on the lips.

“Hi,” he murmurs, eyes crinkling with his smile, and Eddie can’t help smiling back at him.

“Hi,” he echoes. Thinks: I missed you too.

Buck starts to straighten up and—it’s fine, he’s not going to go far, but—a sound of protest catches in Eddie’s throat and he reaches up and snags his boyfriend by the hoodie string and—

Oh. The hoodie!

“You got mail,” he blurts, sitting up so fast he almost smacks Buck in the head.

“Mail…? Oh!” Buck’s eyes light up as he grabs the package. “I didn’t think this would be here until next week.”

“You bought another hoodie?” Eddie asks, trying to sound casual and probably failing. He hopes it’s a nice blue that will bring out Buck’s eyes. Or the kind of pink that makes his lips pop. Or that burnt orange he looks so good in. Or green, or white, or maroon, or purple. He’s pretty sure Buck doesn’t own a purple hoodie yet.

“Actually,” Buck is already ripping open the packaging, his grin bright and unrestrained, “this one is for you.”

Eddie frowns, confused. Why? he almost asks. We both know I’d just steal it from you anyway. And then Buck gets the hoodie out of its packaging inside the packaging (Eddie mourns the environment) and holds it up, the material unfolding to show a grey-blue hoodie that says I stole this from my boyfriend on the front. He blinks. Reads it again.

“Doesn’t it defeat the whole purpose if it’s for me? I mean, if you give it to me, I didn’t really steal it from my boyfriend, did I?”

Buck rolls his eyes, but his grin hasn’t faltered. “I can wear it a few times first, if that helps.”

“I think you should,” Eddie agrees, reaching out to run his fingers over the white letters. They’re embroidered, thread bumpy under his fingers, not the plastic feeling of writing that will flake off after a few too many washes, and when he dips his fingers under the hem, the inside is so soft and cosy he almost shivers just thinking about wearing it.

“Dad?”

They both turn—and Eddie’s heart thumps, a pain that doesn’t really hurt, at the way Buck responds just as easily—to find Christopher making his way towards them.

“Hey, buddy,” Eddie says. “How are you feeling?”

Christopher shrugs, rubbing at his eyes. “I’m thirsty.”

Buck’s hand presses against Eddie’s shoulder just for a second—I’ve got it—and then he’s moving into the kitchen while Eddie fusses over Chris, checking his temperature and getting him settled on the couch and convincing him to try a piece of toast.

“Buck,” Christopher says between nibbling bites of toast, and Eddie watches Buck shake himself back to attention, the long shift starting to catch up with him. “Do you really need another hoodie?””

Buck blinks, slow and cat-like in his confusion, and then his face twists into such exaggerated affront that Eddie has to bite his cheek on a laugh. The packaging is still scattered on the dining table, the new hoodie hanging over the back of a chair, and Chris couldn’t have seen who it was addressed to, but he didn’t even question that it would be Buck.

“There’s no such thing as too many hoodies,” Buck tells Chris mock-seriously. Mostly mock, anyway; Eddie knows there’s a part of him that really believes there is no such thing as too many hoodies.

Christopher’s teeth poke out with his smile. “But we live in LA.”

“LA gets cold,” Buck insists, the same way he insists whenever anyone brings up his absurdly large jacket collection (“it’s not just me! why does no one ever talk about all Hen’s sweaters?”). He looks at Eddie for help, but Eddie just shrugs.

“Kid has a point,” he says, as if he doesn’t spend half his time stealing from his boyfriend’s side of the closet.

Buck grasps his chest in mock betrayal, but there’s a smile pushing at the corners of his mouth.

“Now I know you’re feeling better,” he says, tousling Christopher’s curls while Chris giggles and ducks away.

It’s overwhelming, sometimes, how much Eddie loves them both. His heart is doing that thing again, that hard thump that makes his breath catch, and when Buck glances at him—you okay?—he just shakes his head, smiling back: I love you, I’m okay.

Buck reaches out to take his hand, tangling their fingers together: I love you too. His eyes in the morning light are a pale, glittering blue and Eddie leans over and kisses him, just because he can.

****

Eddie has been expecting to be taken out by the germs from the moment Chris first pushed his food around his plate on Tuesday night and said he wasn’t hungry.

Somehow, it’s Buck who catches the bug next. He crashes for four hours while Eddie putters around doing housework, sleeps right through lunch, and when he wakes up in the afternoon, he’s achy and shivering.

“I’m okay,” he still tries to insist, slumped at the kitchen table while Eddie watches him warily, putting all the sandwich fillings that were offered and rejected back in the fridge. Christopher and Buck are more alike than they both know, their appetites always the first thing to go when something is wrong.

“You’re sick,” Eddie says, shaking his head. “I don’t know why you’re denying it, it was bound to happen.”

Buck grumbles. “I was fine earlier.”

Eddie thinks back, tries to remember if he missed any sign, but Buck really did seem fine earlier. It doesn’t really reassure him; Chris seemed fine when they picked him up from school on Tuesday as well. 

“Go lie down,” he suggests. “The sooner you give in, the sooner you’ll be able to kick this bug.”

More grumbling, but Buck goes to lie down on the couch. Eddie mentally files that under feeling worse than he’s willing to admit. He stands by the table for a moment, listening to Buck and Chris through the open doorway (a muted “hey buddy,” and, “sorry I got you sick, Buck”), the sound of a cartoon explosion on the TV, a funny line of dialogue that should get twin laughs from the couch but doesn’t.

Definitely feeling bad, Eddie thinks, and it’s not like it’s the first time germs have been shared around between the three of them—he’s lost count of how many times they’ve huddled on that couch and taken care of each other—but it still makes his heart squeeze.

When he checks in on them fifteen minutes later, Christopher is fast asleep at one end of the couch and Buck is huddled under a blanket at the other, eyes closed but not sleeping. His face is flushed with fever heat, but even under the blanket, he’s shivering.

“Are you cold?” Eddie frowns, checking Buck’s temperature with the back of his hand.

Buck shrugs, lethargic. His face is half hidden by the blanket, but there’s a tight little scrunch between his brows that means he probably has a headache as well.

“Okay,” Eddie says, quiet. “Hang on.”

He heads for their bedroom, but the dryer beeps so he backtracks to the laundry instead. He pulls out the clean clothes, dumping them all in a basket to be dealt with later, then fishes out the new hoodie that he threw in with the load earlier. It’s warm in his hands, feeling even softer and cosier than it did coming out of the packaging.

“Here,” he says, smiling as he drops it in Buck’s lap. “The sooner you wear it, the sooner I can steal it.”

“You might not want to steal it if I throw up on it,” Buck mumbles, but he puts the hoodie on, struggling for a moment with the left sleeve before his head emerges, curls sticking up in every direction. Eddie runs a hand through his hair, then kisses the top of his head.

“I’d prefer if you didn’t throw up on the hoodie,” he agrees, “but I’d still love you.”

“You always love me.”

Buck blinks up at him, pale and miserable, and even after all these years there’s a persistent thread of wonder in his voice, like he can’t quite believe how much he is loved. Like he can’t quite believe that they made it back here, together, after everything. Eddie can’t blame him because he still can’t believe it sometimes too. He doesn’t know what to do except kiss Buck again, holding him close and hoping that some of his warmth will soak through the layers between them. Buck sinks against him, boneless, and Eddie thinks they could stay like that forever, just holding each other, until Buck pulls away with a low groan.

They spend a while on the bathroom floor after that.

“You’re going to get sick,” Buck tries to protest, but it’s half-hearted; getting sick has pretty much been an inevitability since Christopher brought the note home from school a week ago warning parents that the stomach flu was going around. Once Buck was taken out, it became a certainty. It’s not like Eddie is going to move out of their bed until the germs are gone, after all.

“I’ll risk it,” he says, rubbing Buck’s back. He’d risk a hell of a lot more than a virus for his partner, but it doesn’t feel like the time to say it.

Buck shakes his head, but it’s not really a denial, just, “You don’t want this, Eds.”

Eddie kind of wants to shake him sometimes. To take him by the shoulders and say: I want you, remember? all of you? But he’s pretty sure it would be labouring the wrong point, right now, and it doesn’t really matter anyway because Buck is scrambling to get his head over the toilet again and Eddie can only grimace sympathetically and rub his back. Buck is right: he doesn’t want this bug. But he does want Buck and Chris, so. Germs are a pretty small price to pay.

****

He tosses and turns, sleeping fitfully, and by three a.m. they’re both sick and miserable together.

“Is this what they mean by ‘in sickness and in health’?” Buck asks the ceiling, and Eddie’s sluggish brain has to think through that for a long moment before he remembers:

“We aren’t married.”

“Oh. Yeah.” Buck’s voice sounds far away. “Should we get married?”

Eddie thinks about that for a long moment too.

“Probably,” he decides. And then his stomach twists again and it doesn’t really matter if they’re married or not because he’s too busy throwing up to think about anything except how awful he feels.

****

When Eddie does steal the hoodie, it’s mostly an accident. He wakes up freezing, desperately thirsty, and when he staggers up in search of water, he grabs the hoodie that has been tossed onto the end of the bed without thinking about it. It’s already over his head before he realises that it’s the one Buck was wearing when they crawled into bed.

The next time he wakes up, he’s too warm, Buck a long line of heat pressed up against his back, and he has to wriggle free to wrestle the hoodie off again. It’s damp with fever sweat and he tosses it on the floor in disgust. He just did laundry yesterday, but he’s already thinking about how they’ll need to do it again.

“Okay?” Buck asks, still half asleep.

The answer is yes but also no, I feel like crap, and I hate how never-ending housework is, which is all too much to explain. Eddie just groans and buries his face in his pillow. A sound catches in Buck’s throat, something vague and sympathetic, and he slips a hand under Eddie’s t-shirt to rub his back. Eddie shivers, pressing back into him.

“Your hands are cold,” he mumbles, but it doesn’t mean stop.

Buck shuffles a little closer and kisses the back of his neck: I’ve got you.

Eddie still feels awful, but he thinks he’ll feel a little less awful as long as he has Buck there rubbing his back. He knows this isn’t what either of them meant when they promised to have each other’s backs all those years ago, but it feels inevitable that they ended up here anyway. Buck’s hand moves over his skin, warm and solid and familiar, and Eddie wonders—lets himself wonder, the way he doesn’t usually dare—how it might feel with a ring on his finger. He’s pretty sure it would feel just like this; like home.

****

The hoodie spends two days waiting for someone in the house to have enough energy to do another wash cycle, then three more days at the bottom of the laundry basket waiting to be folded and put away. Buck is the one who finally puts it in the closet, his hands moving restlessly when they get home from a busy shift, jittery from too much caffeine and too little sleep.

“I love you,” Eddie says when he pulls oven cleaner out from under the sink next, “but if you’re going to deep clean our whole house, I’m going to nap without you.”

He’s exhausted, slumped at the kitchen table because even sitting up feels too hard right now, and Buck’s energy is starting to make him a little dizzy. He doesn’t think twenty-four hour shifts used to be this exhausting, maybe he should be more worried about getting old?

“Twenty minutes,” Buck bargains, already reaching for a cloth to scrub the oven with. “I just want to do this and then I’ll join you.”

Eddie considers insisting—he knows Buck is just as exhausted as he is and if he lies down for ten seconds he’ll probably crash—but compromise is the foundation of all good relationships, or so Bobby keeps telling him. It’s a foundation, Eddie is willing to concede, but he’s pretty sure the foundation of all good relationships is trust.

“Twenty minutes,” he agrees. “I better not wake up alone, Buckley.”

Buck smiles, like he can see right through the faux-stern Buckley to the heartfelt honey underneath, and ducks in to kiss Eddie on the cheek on his way to the oven.

“Twenty minutes,” he says. “I promise.”

****

Eddie is out as soon as his head hits the pillow, so he doesn’t know if it is twenty minutes, but when he wakes up and rolls over, he finds Buck sprawled on the bed beside him, dark green hoodie rucked up around his waist, one leg sticking out from under the covers, breath whistling faintly between snores. He smiles and closes his eyes. Chris is at school, the house smells vaguely like lemon disinfectant, he’s warm and comfortable and they have nowhere important to be. He can spare five more minutes before getting up, he thinks.

Half an hour later, they’re still in bed, wrapped up around each other, and Eddie has forgotten why he ever wanted to get up at all.

****

“Uh, isn’t that supposed to be the other way around?” Chimney asks, pointing between them.

Eddie glances at Buck, I stole this from my boyfriend embroidered right over his heart.

“Looks fine to me,” he answers, shrugging.

Buck grins. “You think I look fine?”

Eddie opens his mouth, a dozen answers to that on his tongue, half of them straying dangerously close to NSFW, but Hen beats him to it was a drawn out, “Oookay, save it for when we don’t have to stand here and listen to your foreplay, boys.”

Eddie can feel his cheeks turning pink, but Buck is as unrepentant and shameless as always.

“You could stand somewhere else,” he suggests, and he’s laughing when Hen smacks him in the arm.

****

The hoodie is traded for an LAFD one instead, relegated to Buck’s locker for the duration of their shift. Eddie isn’t fussy; he’s just as happy to watch the LAFD material stretch over Buck’s arms and chest and broad shoulders as he is any other kind of clothing.

Buck goes home with the hoodie tucked into his bag the next morning, but somewhere between walking in the front door and leaning against each other in the kitchen while the coffee maker works its magic, Eddie ends up wearing it. It’s like wearing a hug, he thinks, but that might be the way Buck’s arms are wrapped around his waist as well, a solid wall of heat at his back. Eddie doesn’t want to step away when the coffee machine beeps, but the lure of caffeine is strong enough to get him one step, two, three, cold as soon as his partner’s arms are no longer around him.

“Thanks,” Buck murmurs when Eddie hands him a mug.

Eddie kisses him, a quick peck on the lips, you’re welcome, and Buck catches him by one hoodie string to kiss him again when he starts to step away. The coffee mug in his hand dips and Eddie takes it from him, setting it aside without looking. The space the movement put between them is only there for a second before Buck hooks his hands in the hoodie pouch to pull Eddie closer, deepening the kiss.

“Have I told you lately,” he says between kisses, “that I love when you wear my clothes?”

Eddie hums, busy working his hands under the hem of Buck’s shirt so he can touch as much warm skin as possible. It takes him longer than it ordinarily would to string together the words to say, “I thought you bought this hoodie for me?”

“I bought it because it reminded me of you,” Buck agrees, his own hands under Eddie’s hem now, hot enough to brand everywhere he touches, “but you’re the one who said it doesn’t make sense unless it’s my hoodie.”

“And you said you’d just wear it a few times first,” Eddie reminds him, distracted enough now to frown, hands stilling on Buck’s waist. “Hang on, are you trying to steal my hoodie?”

Buck’s next kiss is more like a bite, teeth nipping under Eddie’s jaw; the promise of a mark that will sit just above where the hoodie might cover it.

“Right now,” he says, the same kind of promise in his voice, “I’m just trying to get you out of it.”

Eddie is more than happy to help with that. He lets Buck take him by the hand and pull him down the hall towards the bedroom, coffee forgotten on the counter, hoodie tugged off and quickly forgotten on the floor. Buck lips press against his skin right over this heart, right where the embroidered words would be, and Eddie feels like there is a mirror image of them etched into the beating muscle beneath his skin: my boyfriend stole this from me. He would have given it—has given it, a dozen times over—but every time he reached into his chest, he found Buck’s name already there.

I love you, Buck presses into his skin with his lips.

And Eddie holds him close and kisses it right back: I love you, I love you, I love you.

****

“Our hoodie.”

“Huh?”

Buck pushes himself up on his elbow and Eddie blinks up at him, his brain still feeling a little melt-y.

“It can be our hoodie,” Buck says, idly tracing a pattern over Eddie’s ribs, just because he can.

“Like a timeshare?” Eddie asks, musing, the start of a smile breaking through. “You steal it this week and I’ll steal it next week?”

Buck flicks him and Eddie grins.

“I take it back,” Buck says, rolling away onto his back. “It’s my hoodie now.”

It’s Eddie’s turn to push himself up on an elbow, going far enough to lean over Buck and kiss him, cradling his face in one hand. It’s just supposed to be one kiss, but Buck kisses back readily, arms wrapping around Eddie’s back, and it’s easy to lose themselves in it after that, the thread of conversation unravelling as they make out.

“Okay,” Eddie says eventually, the word quiet and breathy in the space between them. “Our hoodie.”

It gives him a thrill, the same way it always does, whenever he refers to the two of them as an our. Our home, our family, our hoodie.

Buck’s smile is a brilliant thing. It burrows in through bone and blood and tissue to reach the heart underneath, making itself at home.

“I love you,” he says, so sincere Eddie feels it in his chest.

“I love you too,” he replies, punctuated with a kiss. “You know Hen and Chimney are going to give us so much shit about this hoodie for the rest of our lives, right?”

“Oh yeah,” Buck agrees. “Maddie too. Don’t tell Chris, but she thinks I already own too many hoodies as well.”

Eddie laughs. God, he’s so, so far gone for this man.

“She might have a point,” he says, but he’s pretty sure it just sounds like there’s no such thing as too many hoodies.

Buck rolls his eyes, still crinkled with his smile. “See if I ever buy you a hoodie again.”

It’s an empty threat. And it doesn’t really matter anyway because—

“That’s fine,” Eddie answers. “I’ll just steal yours.”

He can’t be sure, really, which happened first: that first stolen LAFD hoodie, or Buck stealing his heart. He tried once, wine drunk with Hen and Karen, to answer their question about when he knew he was in love, but the only answer that came to him was I’m pretty sure I loved Buck before I knew him.

“I don’t think it’s stealing if I let you,” Buck tells him.

“You’re going to let me, huh?”

“Yeah.” Buck nods. “I don’t know if you’re aware, but I kinda like it when you wear my clothes.”

Eddie grins. “I might have had some idea.”

The proof is on the bedroom floor, or whatever that saying is. He never did understand why it was always in the pudding. It’s on the bedroom floor, and in the way Buck is smiling at him, and in the laundry all mixed up in the basket. It’s the way Buck kisses him, soft and lingering, and the way Eddie’s heart thumps once, twice, a pain that doesn’t really hurt. It’s our home and our family and our hoodie. It’s I love you and I love you and I love you.

It's the fact that they’re here, together, despite everything. Because of everything.

It’s kissing Buck again, and again, and again. Just because he can.

****

(Eddie wonders—lets himself wonder, the way he doesn’t usually dare—how it might feel with a ring on his finger. He’s pretty sure it would feel just like this; like home.)

[potionsprefect]

Motivation

Pairings: Ethan Ramsey x Victoria Clarke

Word Count: 833

Summary: Victoria finds a new way of working out

Rating: General Audiences

Category: Fluff

“Whose idea was this again?” Ethan asked as they stood in their garden.

“Mine of course. Since the twins arrived, we’ve been slacking on the workout routines and we should take advantage of this big garden.” Victoria said.

“And what exactly do you propose?”

“We can easily jog round this garden no problem. As long as the other doesn’t push each other into the pool we’ll be fine.” Victoria laughed.

“Something tells me you already have a plan to do that.”

“Me? Never.”

“I was busy working on my research so if you don’t mind, I’m going to go back to doing that. But I won’t say no to watching you.” Ethan winked.

“You do that.” Victoria said.

Whilst Ethan didn’t disagree with what Victoria said, he wished she had picked a day that he wasn’t busy. He loved his work and everything that came with it and getting an opportunity to write a paper was considered a great honour.

He was already halfway through it and wanted to finish it today so that no more of his time could be taken up with that. Instead, he wanted to spend every moment possible with his wife and two kids.

Becoming a father was the greatest role Ethan could have and it was one that he was treasuring every second. He loved seeing the smiles on Luke and Lily’s faces whenever he woke them up in the morning. He couldn’t believe that this was his life now and he was eternally grateful for it.

Ethan sat down at the garden table and opened up his laptop, as well as switching on his phone and watching his two young children sleep through the camera they had installed by their cots. He propped his phone up by his bed and got to work on writing his paper, his eyes flickering between his word document, his phone and his wife who was putting her earphones in further on down the garden.

Victoria always said that she wanted to maintain a good lifestyle post pregnancy and eagerly counted down the days until she could start exercising again.

She didn’t want to spend a lot of time away from her twins so opted for home workouts. Sometimes, it made her more motivated, other times it didn’t. But she knew that if she committed herself to the workouts, she would start to feel good.

Victoria glanced behind her at Ethan who was typing fast on his laptop. She knew his eyes were flickering towards her every so often. She often caught him staring at her and it made her feeling very loved.

Deciding to give him something to look at, Victoria bent down to touch her toes. She tried to hold this for as long as possible, when she stood back up she saw Ethan looking at her, a grin on his face.

“Like what you see?” She said.

“Always.” He smiled.

For the next half an hour, Victoria followed the workout routine, it pushed her hard and there were times where it was difficult but when she was finally finished, she felt good.

As she headed over to Ethan who was still sat on his laptop, she had a spring in her step. Jenner jumped up at her as she reached Ethan.

“Did you miss me Jenner? Don’t worry. I’m here to give you an unlimited amount of affection.” Victoria laughed.

“I think we can rival each other on affection.” Ethan laughed as Victoria sat on his lap. “How are you feeling?”

“Refreshed. I like this new way of working out. And now the better weather is coming, I’m going to make use of the time outside. How have Luke and Lily been?” Victoria gestured to Ethan’s phone.

“As quiet as a mouse. Which is good considering they kept us up most of the night.” Ethan chuckled. “I’m surprised you had enough energy for today.”

“Me too. But we should treasure every moment with have with them. They won’t stay small forever.” Victoria said.

“True. We should go wake them up, otherwise we’re not getting any more sleep tonight.” Ethan laughed.

Hand in hand, Ethan and Victoria head into Luke and Lily’s room where the twins were wriggling about in their cots. Ethan and Victoria picked them up and stood by the window.

“I hope you both are going to join in with Mommy when she does her workouts when you are older.” Victoria smiled down at Lily. “Daddy would’ve joined in but he was rather busy.”

“Daddy tries not to be busy because he wants to spend as much time with you as possible.” Ethan laughed.

“We can have a lot of fun trying our new activities. And Jenner won’t object if you throw him a ball every so often.”

“I’ll join in for your next workout. It’s about time, I started to get back in shape.” Ethan said.

“I shall look forward to it.” Victoria smiled.

Things were looking bright, and long may things stay that way.

Victoria always puts on a show for Ethan 😉

Tag list: @ohchoices @swiftiexstarwarssimp @queencarb @genevievemd @choicesaddict5 @schnitzelbutterfingers @gryffindordaughterofathena @sophxwithers @romewritingshop @coffeeheartaddict2 @mm2305 @nikki-2406 @maurine07 @nishas-paradise @replayfootsteps @mainstreetreader @lsvdw-blog @kiara-36 @quixoticdreamer16 @headoverheelsforramsey @shanzay44 @itsjustamesshonestly @josiesopenheart @mysticalgalaxysstuff @custaroonie @ireneadlerisseggsy @takemyopenheart @kachrisberry @rookiemartin @jamespotterthefirst @a-crepusculo @natureblooms24 @jerzwriter @wanderingamongthewildflowers @rosebudde @lucy-268 @liaromancewriter @bex-la-get @writer-ish @toadfrog26 @tessa-liam @peonierose @cariantha @kyra75 @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations

[officialchristiancagebbgirlblog]

2: “try and get some sleep baby”

34: “shh, it’s okay. I’m here now”

Hopefully this is okay, I made it into a sort of nightmare in which the reader wakes up to a caring Christian Cage. Any feedback is appreciated! Hope you enjoy! 🩵

Tag: @brideofinfamy

Warnings: none

Theme: angst and fluff at the end

Word count: 1407

Link to masterlist

Happy reading 🖤

“I know it’s not easy, but try and get some sleep baby.”

For the last few days, you had been really struggling to get to sleep. You weren’t sure where the problem was starting but all you knew is you were sick of sleeping so late all the time. Christian laid behind you, spooning your body while one of his cats happily nestled behind his knees. He mumbled sweet nothings into your hair, trying to help you get to sleep. Even though he was half asleep he still tried his best to get you as relaxed as possible before he drifted off into his own dreams.

“I’ll try, babe…” you sighed, feeling him plant a soft kiss on the back of your head and pulling the sheets higher up on your bodies. You went to say goodnight, but by the time you turned your head towards him, he was out like a light.

The clock by your bedside table read 2:13am. It wasn’t the time you wanted to see at all, having tried for hours to get to sleep. Strangely enough, you were tired enough to get to sleep but your brain was just refusing to shut off for the night. It’s not like you had even done anything crazy that night anyways! At best, you and your boyfriend, Christian, had just had a quiet night cooking dinner, watching a movie. Being in his later years, he preferred to stay in and hang out with his girl. There was nothing he needed to prove to anyone by bringing you out, showing you off to his friends to prove that ‘he’s still got it!’ He didn’t need to prove to anyone that he was still worthy of being loved by younger women. So he chose to spend his nights relaxing with you instead. He knew you didn’t enjoy going out and partying until the early hours of the sunrise, so it never took much convincing to get you to stay home with him.

You envied Christian for being able to sleep so quickly. As soon as you guys had got yourselves tucked in he fell asleep. Snoring away behind you, his sounds were oddly relaxing. They were loud, occasionally a little bit squeaky but it was just enough to help lull you into a restless sleep.

Once your eyes finally closed and you melted into the sheets, you found yourself standing alone in a hallway. Wide awake.

‘Strange…’ you thought aloud, ‘where is everybody?’

Wandering down the hall you could hear faint, illegible voices that went up and down in both tone and volume. Almost like a weird song? You couldn’t quite pinpoint who the voices belonged to but it definitely sounded familiar. Deciding to stop, you pressed your ears against a closed wooden door on your right to see if you could make out what they were saying. But weirdly, as you got closer you heard more voices that made it so hard to hear as you got closer to the wood. They were loud, distorted, and almost angry. But after some head movements, you found the sweet spot on the door that allowed you to make out at least some words. Sadly, though, it might’ve just been better to ignore them.

“She’s just so…and I don’t…why would he go…someone as young as…she’s just in it…for the money…he could do…so much better…”

‘Oh my god,’ you gasped, ‘is…is that what she thinks of me?!’

It took you a moment to figure out who the voice might belong to, and you felt your heart drop when you realised it was one of Christians friends. It could’ve been Shayna, or possibly Beth but you weren’t fully certain on which of the girls. You swallowed thickly, and with a tightness on your chest you continued down the hall. On your left, this time, was a new wooden door. Except this one was painted Green with a little peephole looking into the room. You could see the back of someone sitting, typing furiously on their phone and dictating loudly what they were writing. Whoever they were, they were practically shouting their words of hatred:

“What does he even see in her…why on Earth…date a younger…she deserves to be-“

Quickly and clumsily stepping back, you tried to spare yourself from hearing the end of that sentence. You felt the cool wall slam against your back as you stumbled down to the floor.

‘Oh my god, what’s going on?!’ You thought to yourself, head buried in your hands, body trembling. The tightness on your chest started to feel more like a weight. Like something was sitting on it, hot and kind of fuzzy? It almost felt like it was merging with the inside of your throat. After what felt like forever, you found the courage to lift your head only to be met with an open doorway. Looking in, sat on a lone chair in the middle of an otherwise empty room sat Christian. Staring at you. With no love in his eyes.

He didn’t say anything, just watched as you shakily lifted yourself off the floor to walk towards him. With each step closer, his expression became more sour and angry.

‘Baby, it’s…it’s me. What’s wrong?” You questioned, lips quivering. Still, he stayed silent and unmoving.

‘Please just say something! Anything!’

Slowly he stood from the chair, eyes trained on you with a scowl plastered on his face. He took a step forward towards you and placed his hands on your shoulders.

‘You disgust me…’ he spat out, beginning to shake you violently. With each shake, he shouted disgusting comments at you, spit flying all over your face as he closed the space between the two of you. You couldn’t move. You couldn’t even breathe. The man that you were in love with stood before you shouting abuse at you. Tears streamed down as you stared at his greying face, his cheeks burning a bright red of hatred. Everything felt like it was shaking around you, and you had the odd sensation of being lifted from the ground. But, his voice kept you distracted from everything around you. You barely even noticed his expression soften, his voice suddenly quiet and soothing.

“Hey, wake up!”

Sitting up in a panic, you almost shrieked. The heavy feeling in your chest quickly disappeared as his cat (who was previously cuddled up on your chest) tumbled down into your lap with a gentle meow in protest. She hopped away from the bed, unhappy with the level of respect. Apparently she didn’t much appreciate rolling down somebody's body. Looking around the room that was just barely lit with the lamp beside your boyfriend you realised where you were. Back in the safety of his bedroom. It was just a horrible nightmare. It still didn’t stop your sobs and violent shakes as you fell sideways into his awaiting arms.

“Oh baby, shh. Shh, it’s okay. I’m here now…” he mumbled, face buried in your hair, hands caressing your arms. You tried to speak but you just couldn’t get the words out between sobs.

“No it’s okay, sweet girl, you don’t have to say anything. I know you had a nightmare. You don’t have to tell me what happened.”

His reassuring words helped you calm down quicker, his soft hands acting as a fantastic distraction from the sadness. Finally you were able to calm down again. The tears had stopped flowing, the shakes were less violent. But that didn’t stop him from continuing to hold you, rocking you side to side. You looked over to him to see him flash you a warm smile.

“Are you feeling better now?” He held an open bottle of water to your lips, trying to get you to have a few sips which you gratefully accepted. Still feeling too upset to properly talk, you gave him a nod before laying back down under the covers. He placed the water down and turned off the lamp, plunging the room back into darkness. There was a brief moment of anxiety which quickly washed away as he nuzzled in next to you.

“Th…thank you.” You managed to mutter out, just loud enough for him to hear. Another kiss was given to you but this time on your cheek.

“I’m here for you sweet girl, whatever happens. Try and get back to sleep if you can, okay? I promise I won’t let go of you tonight.”

[gentil-minou]

MDZS Daycare AU where Wangxian are co-lead teachers for a class of 10-18 month old babies and have a secret of their own.

---

Lan Wangji is the morning lead teacher while Wei Wuxian is the evening lead, and their shifts overlap for about 5 hours which is where max chaos ensues.

Mianmian, the assistant teacher in the mornings, and Mo Xuanyu, the assistant in the afternoons, like to confer over their findings when they take their breaks during nap time, leaving their heads in the classroom to...stare? Glare? at each other. They're not sure.

When Mianmian gets in for her shift at 8am, Lan Wangji is already there with the youngest kid on their roster, Wen Yuan, who always gets dropped off first every morning before she even arrives.

The babies trickle, with a mixture of tears and giggles, and of course a complete mood turn around once their caregivers have left them, A-Qing especially who goes from sobbing bloody murder to laughing maniacally as soon as her dads leave.

Lan Wangji keeps the morning peaceful with circle time and baby meditation which is mostly him and Mianmian trying to get the babies to sit still and somehow succeeding? Lan Wangji has to be magic.

They read a few books and sing some cute songs with the babies and it's all really nice and tranquil.

Then at 10AM, Wei Wuxian comes in and all hell breaks loose.

Where Lan Wangji is all about structured play meant to engage the babies' fine motor skills, Wei Wuxian is a "let them run free and wild" type.

His favorite activity is to cover a peace of long sheet paper in puddles of paint and let the babies go wild. Sometimes Mianmian and Lan Wangji are able to get smocks on them first…but most of the time there's a frantic clothing change before lunch so the babies don't fall asleep in paint covered clothing.

Mianmian has no idea how Jingyi always manages to get pain in his diaper, but yeah. Always.

She's trying to change as many babies as she can while she watches Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian argue again about Wei Wuxian's plans for the afternoon activity, which is really just "collect mud during out walk from outside and bring it inside!"

Lan Wangji glares at him with his mouth in a straight line while Wei Wuxian is clearly trying to not laugh at his face. At least little A-Yuan is there tugging on their pants to act as a cute buffer. No one can ever resist little A-Yuan.

He still hasn't learned how to crawl yet, so he scoots around everywhere on his butt which is insanely adorable. And he recently learned how to say "Ge!" and Wei Wuxian just about burst into tears the first time he did.

To be fair though, right now A-Yuan calls everything "Ge".

His teachers, including Mianmian? Ge.

Friends? Ge.

His carrots? Ge.

His bunny stuffy? Ge.

Naturally, nobody minds at all.

Around lunch time, when half of the babies are nodding off in either their simple rice dishes or mess of mashed something, Mo Xuanyu comes in to help them get the babies ready for bedtime. They spend half the time getting Wei Wuxian to lower his voice, with Lan Wangji sending him a dirty look.

It's funny because Mianmian has seen Wei Wuxian fill in as the only head when Lan Wangji was out. He absolutely knows how to be quiet at nap time.

Makes sense why he just smirks at Lan Wangji instead of really watching his volume.

Once the babies are all asleep, the head teachers confer over their lesson plans while rubbing the backs of the few stragglers who never quite sleep as fast, Mianmian and Mo Xuanyu go out for a walk and eat their lunch.

There, Mianmian fills Mo Xuanyu in on the day's anctics, which mostly just becomes a chance for them to gossip about their lead teachers.

"They're insane, I swear," Mo Xuanyu says as he takes the cheese off his pizza slice and eats the bread and cheese separately for…some reason. "Like how did they even start working together?"

"I heard Yanli had them placed together because they requested it." Mianmian eats her pizza normally, thank you, with extra pineapple and ham and mayo drizzled all over.

"God they're like obsessed with each other, I swear."

They head back in just as Zizhen starts crying, waking all the other babies and then they're off, Mo Xuanyu heading diaper duty this time while Mianmian gets their afternoon snacks ready. Wei Wuxian reads a book with way more theatricality than necessary for babies who probably don't have the ability to understand yet, but they watch him, enraptured by his voice as Lan Wangji puts their sleeping mats away.

Mianmian leaves soon after, once the babies are seated with their cheerios and blueberries and sippy cups, leaving Mo Xuanyu to help out with the afternoon shift.

They take the babies out in a walk using a giant baby wagon that honestly looks like it belongs on a rollercoaster and Mo Xuanyu is a bit put out that he can't fit in the seats. He's tried. They checked.

They take the babies on a promenade around the waterfront area where their daycare is, Wei Wuxian flittering about grabbing sticks and leaves for sensory exploration and pointing out all the cool birds. At the same time, Lan Wangji stands perfectly stoic and vigilant for passersby trying to take pictures of a kid they don't know (like who does that???) as well as a sniffley nose.

Usually that sniffley nose is Wei Wuxian, who is getting more energy out than any of the babies. Lan Wangji hands him a tissue all the same.

They get back in soon after, which is around when Lan Wangji has to leave to get to his night classes for his Masters in Early Childhood Education.

Mo Xuanyu heads up the afternoon circle time, singing songs and making up the lyrics cause he really never had the chance to learn nursery rhymes when he was a kid. He watches from the corner of his eyes as the head teachers mutter something to each other by the door, heads close together. But he can't focus for long when Jingyi has decided to climb on top of A-Yuan who is, for whatever reason, perfectly unbothered.

Lan Wangji leaves and Wei Wuxian joins them, taking over circle time. That's when the real fun begins.

Wei Wuxian's goal at the end of they day is to tire the babies out as much as possible so their poor parents won't have a hard time getting them to rest.

Mo Xuanyu thinks that's just an excuse for all the caffeine he drinks kicking in.

They start with one of the messier art activities Wei Wuxian can't get away with when Lan Wangji is around, usually involving some bits of natures that he'd dub "unhygienic".

"Pfft," Wei Wuxian tells Mo Xuanyu, for the thousandth time. "Everyone needs to eat dirt. Builds immunity."

Mo Xuanyu isn't sure that's how it works, but at least the babies love splashing in mud and sticking leaves to pieces of paper.

Once they change the babies into a second set of spare clothes, it's dance party time. The best time actually.

Babies can't really dance, but it's cute watching them wiggle their little butts and try. Wei Wuxian usually picks at least one kid to dance to Old McDonald with, spinning them around and around.

Usually the baby he picks is A-Yuan. They're not supposed to have favorites, but well Mo Xuanyu can't blame him. He is the cutest.

Sometimes they get noise complaints from the other classrooms, especially the actual baby room with the 3 month to 9 month old and their sleep schedule that are basically all the time.

Wei Wuxian typically just smooths it over by bringing Jin Ling over to join their party.

It's technically not allowed, and theoretically they should be careful since he's the boss' son and all, but Wei Wuxian is the boss' adopted brother and anyways the teachers on the baby baby room just give him a grateful look for keeping the colic baby busy and away from their splitting eardrums.

Once the dance part is over and Wei Wuxian and Mo Xuanyu are lying on the carpet, letting the babies crawl over them in some attempt at "building movement skills", they get a bit of a reprieve before the real challenge of the day starts.

Pick up time.

This is when Wei Wuxian actually listens to Lan Wangji's suggestions for small group play, and they divide into three groups, one with independent play in the pretend area for the older babies that are more toddlers now and two others focused on sensory exploration and fine motor skills. Fancy words for saying the dollhouse area, the playdough zone (monitored by Mo Xuanyu because these babies will absolutely eat it) and the puzzle table that Wei Wuxian keeps an eye on as he greets the parents.

He's great with them, seriously. The parents love Wei Wuxian. It's like a switch flips and he goes from chaos gremlin to genius in childcare, offering really well thought out explanations for the activities the kids engaged in as he hands their artwork to the parents.

They ask him to babysit all the time, but Wei Wuxian deflects and makes some excuse about having busy evenings and weekends, then gestures to Mo Xuanyu who always needs the extra cash.

Mo Xuanyu is always struck with awe at this. He has a lot to learn from Wei-qianbei.

Sometimes the parents join them a bit for play, but a lot of the times, they just leave. Bustling their babies up in their coats with extra cuddles and taking them home, happy to spend a few hours with them before bedtime.

It's Mo Xuanyu's favorite time of the day actually. A good parent's unconditional love for their kid, who can resist?

The last one to leave, is, of course, poor little A-Yuan sitting at the puzzle table with Wei Wuxian. Once the second to last kid leaves, usually Jingyi screaming down the hall as his amused mom follows sedately after him, Wei Wuxian gives Mo Xuanyu a tired smile and tells him he can go.

"Are you sure? I can help clean up?"

The room looks like a tornado ran through it, every time. Mo Xuanyu always feels guilty leaving early, but he has night classes…so…

Wei Wuxian waves him off, "Don't sweat it, I have to stay a bit later anyways. I've got this."

Mo Xuanyu relents and goes over to smack a wet kiss on A-Yuan's chubby cheek before he leaves. He gets a gummy smile as his reward, and he and Wei Wuxian laugh as he leaves the room.

Mo Xuanyu can't help but feel a little sad for A-Yuan. The first to arrive and the last to leave. His parents must be so busy. He hoped they get to spend time with him on the weekends at least, hopefully.

The classroom is always quiet this time in the evening, and Wei Wuxian fluffs A-Yuan's messy mop of hair before he stands up.

"Well, A-Yuan…shall we clean up before your baba gets here?"

It doesn't take long actually, and Wei Wuxian has only just finished putting the toys away and is about to start on the mess in the sink when A-Yuan's other dad arrives.

Lan Zhan always come by after his last class to pick them up. He usually has a line of tension across his forehead, the long day having finally gotten to him.

Wei Wuxian smooths it out with gentle kiss and a hug, and asks "Who annoyed my poor husband today? Should I go beat them up for you?"

Lan Zhan's stiff shoulders droop as he relaxes into Wei Wuxian's embrace, releasing an exhausted sigh.

"Su She," he mutters into Wei Wuxian's neck, lips pressed against the soft silk of his skin.

Wei Wuxian snorts, "Of course. I'll get him for you, baby. Make him wish he never thought about messing with you."

Wei Wuxian runs his fingers through Lan Zhan's hair, luxuriating in the moment, before their son pipes up, not one to be ignored for long.

"Ge!"

His dad share a private laugh. "One of these days you'll call for us properly, right little bunny?" Wei Wuxian says, lifting A-Yuan into the air and smiling at his sweet giggles. "Come on, try it. Ba-ba. A-Die. Ba-ba." He sounds the letters out and points to him and Lan Zhan in turn, so there can be no mistake.

A-Yuan just tilts his head in confusion and gives them a puzzled look. "Ge?"

Wei Wuxian heaves a weary sigh as Lan Zhan takes A-Yuan from him and cuddles him against his chest. "Well, at least I tried. I'll just finish up here, and then we can head home, mmkay?"

"Mn." Lan Wangji nods as A-Yuan burrows into his shoulder with a sleepy sigh. He presses a kiss against the soft baby hair that grows wild on A-Yuan's head, swinging them gently back and forth as Wei Ying putters about and straightens the rest of the room.

He always wants to make the room prefect for Lan Wangji when he comes in early tomorrow morning. It brings a small smile to Lan Wangji's face thinking of the level of consideration his husband gives him, even with their conflicting teaching styles.

After this, they'll head home and enjoy a nice simple meal, spend an hour with A-Yuan just the three of them, before bathtime and bed.

Then, Lan Wangji and Wei Ying will have their own time, just for them.

Tomorrow, it will all repeat.

Maybe it's not the most conventional lifestyle in the world, but there's little Lan Wangji can complain about when he gets to spend every day with his husband and son, doing what they love, together.

fin.

(threadfic here)

[h-ruchiyo]

Your dainty hands began to type down the last page of revision for your boss, carefully looking at the corner of the monitor as a small '20:38' was trying its best to remind you of the due; hoping you can submit your work last minute before the deadline in less than half an hour.

As if your body received another injection of adrenaline and caffeine from a sip of this god-awful coffee, cursing at anyone who gave you this before submitting your finished paper and clocking out right away; cursing at your boss inside your head before realised how free you were now since tomorrow would be your last week as their (underpaid and overworked) intern.

"Lola, Lola, hmm,"

You hummed along the way back to the apartment, holding your bag tightly in your hand as you could see how crowded it was; numerous people flocking around to hold each other close while you had decided that spending another night of reading Bloomic's latest chapter might be a best go-to.

After a refreshing shower and a can of cold drink in your hand, no one could stop you from reading your only coping mechanism to postpone the upcoming dread of existential crisis you shall face one day; well, 'or so' you thought.

As you decided to take a break and looked around for cute ships on Twitter, a post caught you surprised since it was your first time reading it ever.

"Huh? A discord server for Bloomic?"

As if you were in trance, your finger began to hover around to click the link and there you were, inside the server as Bloombot barged you around with a few questions then let you go to the wild '#general' with some unread messages related and directed to you.

"Oh, wow, what is this,"

You muttered under your breath, standing up from your position to turn your PC on and drinking down the rest of your drink; fingers hovering over the keyboard as your eyes were trained to reach each message carefully by greeting each one of them personally, thinking it'd be the best instead of being vague and whisk around nowhere.

Your eyes lit up at a comment this one account made, claiming you could call him Xyx as each one of them began to introduce themselves including the mod aka Quest; a sweetman who reminded you of warm cinnamon roll and spiced latte in the late autumn.

"'wanna call?' man, this mod is friendly for sure."

You agreed to his invitation since some members were busy with their own stuff on other channels or going idle for a moment to sort life out in real life.

Clicking on the voice channel, you tried to find your headphones for a bit before going back to connect it with your PC; not realising that your camera was on this whole time and Quest's cheeks were in fire when he got a good look of your appearance.

Sitting inside a modern chic room with few decorations, he could see a young woman wearing a flimsy sleeping dress as her hair was draped over her shoulders; looking around for something nearby her desk before going back to the call and made contact with his eyes.

"Oh, hi!"

He smiled, reaching his ears while his arm was seen resting on top of the table; giving you a view of a tattoo covering his limb before you returned the smile, giving him a slight wave before disconnecting your headphones and taking it off from your head, feeling pissed as the lack of sound it provided.

Quest began to introduce himself, looking away once in a while as he explained how the server worked and expected how everyone would act from now on, stating the Bloombot could get confusing for him sometimes to control around.

"Thank you for looking after all of us, Quest. I feel so happy that you're here with me."

A small and appreciative sentence that rolled over your tongue smoothly, almost giving Quest a small heart attack if it wasn't for his hand gripping on his desk; trying his best to calm his heart beat and dizzy head, almost getting drunk from all those praise you threw at.

"God, angel. If it's for you, I'd for sure throw everything away and run straight to you."

You listened to him carefully as your cheeks were heated up, almost gaping at his words; hoping that he'd stop striking you away with these comments before you could actually start to combust due to him.

As he looked at your face through the screen, he made a hope for once after a while. A hope to see you in real life, gazing into his eyes and threading his fingers between yours — away from his boss, coworkers and Bloombot, that always goes hard with its censorship.

"Well then, angel. I suppose I should call it a night now, you look tired. Can't have you sleeping on me, yes?"

A deep chuckle escaped from his lips, making you break the eye contact and look away to suppress your embarrassment; wondering if the call was supposed to be like this or you were overthinking over such a small nickname.

The night finally had its grasp around you and lulled you to a state Quest finding you look cutest for tonight.

Your head was resting against your arm on the desk, looking up to see him with your half-lidded eyes and pursed lips; trying to fight the spell moon had cast over you.

"Sleep well, angel. Have a good one for me, yes?"

"Hey, intern, we need you here! Come fast!"

Your black pumps stumped against the concrete floor almost hurriedly, giving you a cramp since today had been quite hectic and a worker had asked you to cover her shift for today since she had an emergency issues at home.

You went forward and back, running around the office with fresh prints every minute and placing it on everyone's cubicle; double take each of them to make sure none was left out and let out a sigh as it was finally lunch hour, a time for you to take a deep breath and give your poor calves a massage.

Sitting at the cafeteria, you watched a long line of workers and decided to take some time to sip on iced milk tea with boba and cream on the top; understanding how good it was and perfect for Lola's exhausting life, running around and facing life-changing moments on almost every chapter.

"Angel?"

You looked up and met a pair of brilliant blue eyes staring back at your eyes, not expecting to find him out of everyone to meet you at the cafeteria here. As if he was asking for permission to sit down with you with those eyes, you gave him a nod before holding out your hands to take the tray from his hand, placing it on the table as he sat down in front of you.

"Um, hi."

You flashed him a small smile, eyes' corners slightly crinkled with some sweat beads went past over it. He looked down for a minute, not returning your smile right away like last night and instead taking out a handkerchief, dabbing it over your forehead.

"Sorry, you look tired and I— I can't, y'know,"

He stuttered over his words, eliciting a warm laugh from you as you wrapped your hands around his wrist and putting it down gently before sending him another shockwave in his lane with a small 'thank you'.

Apparently, Quest had been working here for a while (preferably almost five to six years) at the marketing section as a salesman and almost rarely leaving his cubicle, enjoying most of his time inside including during lunch time due to endless works.

You could see he tried to muster it up and play it off as a small joke, but the darkening circles under his eyes and fine lines around them couldn't fool you. Quest was for sure tired and never got enough rest after he started to work here, barely hanging on the thread.

"Can you work on them home, Quest?"

"Yeah, but, I'd rather not, you know?"

"How about going to my place tonight? I'll help you out."

Quest might have started to call you 'angel' because your eyes always glowed in his eyes and whenever he listened to your voice, it felt as if, everything was worth it and he's willing to stay up late at night and finish all his works before eight so he could have you all for himself until time for him to clock out.

But, this?

It took him aback and he was basically a stranger, one that you could always walk past and forget in a week; but, why would you offer him such a suggestion? Working here was already tired enough and he would feel bad for taking up so much of your free time at home.

Alas, here both of you were, spending time with you after finishing his total workload until next week in less than eight hours; pushing each other's capabilities until it reached its limit before Quest slumped down in his seat while you were half-asleep against the bed, letting out a small giggle when you got caught red-handed staring at him.

"You look tired, angel. C'mere,"

He spread his legs open and put a hand on his right thigh before realising what he was doing, straightening his back with panic written all over his face. As you walked in his direction, you put your hand over his chest, trying to calm him down before sitting on his lap — resting your cheek against his left chest as your legs were over his right leg, smiling slightly when his hands began to massage them gently.

While it wasn't supposed to be a shock for you, having Quest to be in your real life was still a surprise. He was tall and bulky with broad shoulders, yet the way he talked and brought himself reminded you of a small raccoon after getting a food.

"Ah, yes, Quest, right there"

You moaned close to his ear, noticing your feet were feeling better than before since you took off those pumps; cursing at the company's requirements to have you wear black pumps with heels above five centimetre and below fifteen.

Quest started to feel embarrassed again just like before at the cafeteria, touching his warmed up cheek with the back of his hand before looking down to see you in the eyes; lips hovering and lightly brush each other when you could feel his breath started to get heavier.

"May I?"

He cupped your cheek, cradling you closer to his side before he pressed his lips against yours; humming at the combination of sweet taste of your drink and chapstick, placing his other hand around your waist to pull you closer and sit down on top of him, knees hitting again the seat in the process.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and then went down to his chest, using it as a leverage to deepen the kiss; humming slightly as you could feel him starting to get hard under you.

You broke the kiss and looked into his eyes, asking for silent permission before taking off his tie and shirt; after giving you a small nod, you took off your shorts and his belt, slightly fumbling before he blew out his signature laugh, giving you a small comfort and reassurance before shifting your eyes back to his face.

"Fuck, angel,"

His hands were both on your waist, tightly gripping on the soft skin as you began to grind your hips against his; sucking on a sharp breath when he began to lower you down, making a direct contact with his clad one.

"Take your panties off, sweetie. Let daddy do the rest for you, hmm?"

He brushed his thumb against your cheek, sensing a slight nervousness as you put your panties away and Quest began to do something similar; hand not leaving your side when you went back to align yourself with him, giving you some time adjusting to his size as the tip had slipped inside.

Your hands were still on his chest, depending on it as a leverage while his other hand was right behind your back; keeping you steady and close to him, making the older man feel in cloud nine when you looked at him with those eyes — begging for him to take control and let you watch how everything unfolded.

It didn't take long for him to lose control of himself, slamming your hips down even though his thick, fat head was already hitting the deepest part inside you minutes ago; not giving you any space to breathe and making your hips bouncing on his, covering his whole length with your slick before slamming it down again.

"Never knew you'd be so tight, angel. Scared?"

You whimpered, digging your nails into his shoulders while he treated you like a fleshlight; ignoring your pleas to go easy, as if he knew that if he stopped right now, you'd probably beg to go like this — all messy, sticky and drunk on his cock; boosting his confidence on rewarding you for tonight.

You might have hoped he would ignore your clit for tonight, but, it was Quest; he would never forgive himself for not paying any attention to every inch of your body, leaving one of them ignored. And thus, he began to draw a small circle around your clit, eliciting a ripped scream from your throat as you made a mess over his lower stomach and length; a white ring forming on the base as he kept thrusting his hips against yours, overstimulating you in the process.

"Angel, do you want me to cum inside?"

"Yes, don't worry about it."

He watched your eyes rolling to the back, sweaty skin slapping against each other and then spreading your ass with his hands, giving him a chance to angle himself better before a thick rope of his cum filled you up to the brim; forming a small bump on your stomach as Quest rested his hand and put some pressure on it, letting his cum oozing out your folds.

"This is one way to end the day after our first meeting this morning, eh?"

[startouched--blog]

hello!!!! can i have hcs with ichrio, samatoki, and kuko with their nonbinary significant other who is autistic and likes true crime and watches a lot of documentaries? i reaally need some autistic representation!

Hihi! sorry this took a little while to get to! I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

SCENARIO - Ichiro, Samatoki, and Kuko having a s/o who enjoys watching documentaries with them, along with having some autism/nm

PAIRINGS - Ichiro x gn!reader // Samatoki x gn!reader // Kuko x gn!reader

GENRE - Headcanons, fluff, physical touch (not NSFW)

Ichiro Yamada ─── ✧

☇ Even though he likes anime a lot more, he can't really say no when you bounce around him and ask to spend the night watching something with you. ☇ He obviously loves spending this time with you, being able to see what you're interested in is a good way to know each other more, after all. ☇ He would set up a small area on his bed with a bunch of pillows and a blanket to wrap up in if you get cold, or something to rub your hand against. ☇ He would make some small snacks that you enjoy eating, just like he would when you were watching something he wanted to watch. ☇ Ichiro sits beside you and wraps an arm around you, making sure you were alright with the physical tough of course. ☇ Sometimes, you don't realize what time it is and get fixated on watching the documentary,, so Ichiro half the time needs to drag you away and get you to go to bed. " come on babe- it's time to get to bed, we got work tomorrow morning after all"

"nooooooooo, one more episode please?"

" fine fine, one more, then we go to bed"

Samatoki Aohitsugi ─── ✧

☇ Honestly, Samatoki seems like the type of person who would be interested in these sort of films or documentaries.

☇ Sometimes you two like to walk them while in the Yakuza building, just as a past time if you're waiting on something or need something to listen to while working on paperwork.

☇ When you're watching it at work, you tend to sit on one of the wheelie chairs and spin around in circles slowly, sitting in the chair backwards, every so often looking back at the screen instead of just listening to it.

☇ Samatoki works on his work and sometimes stops you from spinning so you don't get too dizzy.

☇ When you don't happen to be watching them, you two could talk for hours about what you just watched, usually a conversation over dinner or on the drive/walk home.

☇ When at home, Samatoki will cuddle you in bed and watch some of the documentaries with you, often ending up cuddling you all the way to sleep.

"jeez, can't even stay up long enough to finish the show"

"sleep well though, love"

Kuko Harai ─── ✧

☇ He is on the same wave length with you when you're bouncing around, asking him to watch something with you while he was done with his chores for the day,, very energetic and up to the task

☇ He'd sit you down somewhere in his room on his futon, cuddling up in a blanket with you, turning on one of the various documentaries you had put onto the watchlist.

☇ He tends to play with your hair while watching, either braiding it loosely or just weaving his fingers through,, Sometimes you do the same back, even though he didn't have much hair to do it to.

☇ He loves the long conversations you two are able to have after each documentary, talking either about how stupid one of the people in the documentary was, or just in general how the crime could have easily been avoided.

☇ eventually, there is the time where Kuko is called by his father to continue or start doing his work again, but he never really wanted to,, But no one can really defy their parents can they.

"it's alright, we can continue watching some later when that old man's in bed, alright?"

"alright,, don't take too long like last time!"

Hope this wasn't a bad set of headcanons! have a great day to whoever requested this and whoever is reading :D

[lbxbx]

I’ve had diabetes since I was a kid and tend to drop my sugar fast and hard and if I don’t catch it in time I get super sick. Can you maybe Drabble and give me your headcanons on how the boys would take care of you?

Oh no.

I hope you’re doing well, T1D is seriously exhausting and literal pain in the butt 🤕

I’m sorry this took some time but it’s my first time doing headcanons like these, but hey your girl got you so sit back and enjoy ❤️❤️

KNJ

“Why’d you call him?” You were holding the bucket onto your lap as Yoongi was assisting you with the least he can do, which is holding back your hair off of your face. It hurts him to see you this pale and sick, specially that this isn’t your first time binge eating candies until you ended up being hospitalized.

“He needs to know Y/N, he said he’s coming here in no time.” He grabs your hair tighter when you cough again before throwing up into the bucket, tears are already streaming down your face and your tummy hurts. Namjoon’s reaction wasn’t different from any other time, he’s rushing to the hospital after he managed to take an hour leave out of his work to take care of you, and the second he gets into the hospital even the staff recognize him and lead him towards the bed you’re in.

“Hey, there you are.” He rushes towards you and grabs your hair instead, it shatters him to see you like this constantly that he’d do anything to make you feel better. “It’s okay, you’re going to be okay.”

He eases you, knowing that you always panic when this happens, his soft touch on your face and the little rubs he gives to your back can ease the pain in a second, and he’s not even half grossed out when he sees you all pale and sweaty and puking when this happens repeatedly, he finds himself wanting to shower you with kisses and he ends up doing it, and again you swear he kisses the pain away.

Namjoon is the type that gets super worried over you, he wakes up in the middle of his sleep just to make sure you’re breathing, he keeps his eyes locked onto your chest just to watch it rising, a sigh of relief is always followed by that before he goes back to his sleep.

 “Once this is over I’ll take you home so we can spend the couple next days together.”

-

KSJ

“I know you don’t feel good, I just came in to see if there’s anything I could do to you.” He walks into the kitchen to see your hands shaking, eagerly looking around for something sweet, you’re starting to feel low and you could almost swear you were about to pass out.

The entire night you were quiet and not much came out of your mouth, and Seokjin was the type to observe from away, he wouldn’t show you he’s worried nor would he get up on his feet to actually help you unless you totally need him. This was something you wanted and you requested since he keeps observing your body and how you change when you’re starting to feel low.

Seokjin’s recent search on his phones is “Remedies to treat Diabetes at home.” When he knows that this is chronic and cannot be treated, but the man hasn’t lost his hope, he secretly visits your doctor without you just to make sure you’re doing good and if there’s anything he can do for you at home just to prevent any complications.

“I got you this.” Your head snaps towards him to see him holding a jar of biscuit butter, being emotional and irritable when you feel low is a common thing, do your eyes burn or are those tears?

 You grab out a spoon before putting it into your mouth, and in seconds you feel yourself recharged. And he’s watching you with a faint smile lingering on his face, he would give you the world if you wanted it.

-

MYG

“Give me your finger.” He doesn’t even spare a glance towards you, you don’t remember what your glucometer looks like anymore since he has it all the time, he has an alarm on his phone to check you four times a day even when you promise him that you feel totally okay and there’s nothing to worry about.

You roll your eyes and give him your hand, he carefully grabs onto you and pokes the tiny needle into the tip of your finger before dabbing some blood onto the tiny slide. A smirk lies on your face when you memorized what he does all the time, he cleans your finger with a cotton pad before kissing the tip of it and apologizing quietly. “Sorry.”

It takes the device five second to flash the number which is considered totally normal for you, but not normal enough for Yoongi, so he gets up onto his feet and makes his way to the kitchen before rushing back in seconds.

“Here’s some Gatorade and chocolate.” With a stable voice tone he puts the things in front of you and takes his seat back next to you on the couch which makes you giggle and wrap your arms around him, peppering his cheek with little kisses. “Thank you.”

-

JHS

“I’m Jung Hoseok and I’ll be your doctor for today.” He walks into your bedroom wearing his white button up shirt and glasses which makes you laugh your heart out at him, you had just passed out a couple minutes ago and he found you lying on your bathroom floor, which he cannot deny made him panic.

You usually sense that you’re about to get low for this time you felt nothing, even when you spent the night with him and it was considered somewhat a heavy workout session, you usually snack on something but this time you didn’t and you got into the bathroom to take a shower and ended up where you are right now.

“Stop, I’m okay now.” You whine when comes closer and pretends to be giving you an actual physical examination. “Mhm, looks okay to me, yup.” He moves down to your stomach and tickles you until you’re out of breath laughing and kicking your legs onto the bed. “Nooo please.” You struggle to push him and he finally stops.

“I’m glad you’re doing okay.” He whispers, a soft smile sitting on his lips as he cups your cheeks, he even leans closer to kiss you on the forehead. “And next time we’re showering together.”

-

PJM

“Wow you’re really hot.” His hand lands onto your forehead.

“Of course I am.” You scoff as you get rid of your pants, it was very normal for you to be overheated and it was his first time actually seeing you this hot, he looks at you amused and confused, wondering what to do and how to help.

He laughs and tilts his head. “You clearly haven’t lost your sense of humor, but you’re burning up which is not good.”

“Yeah, I know.” You’re way too tired to smile at how adorable he looks, his doe eyes staring at you like you’re a fragile piece of glass worried that you’d break at any second. “Do you want me to get you anything?”

“Yeah, can you get me the glucometer from behind you?” You point behind him, he stretches to the table behind him to grab the little device and hand it to you. “What’s that?”

“Let me show you how this works.” You proceed to open it and turn on the device, before sanitizing the tip of your finger and grabbing the little needle, he panics and holds your hands to stop you. “What are you doing?”

“Checking my blood glucose.” You giggle before poking your finger and dripping blood onto the slide. “Does it hurt?” He whispers

“Not at all.” You shake your head, he grabs your finger to wipe away the blood before kissing your hands, “And can I try?”

-

KTH

“Please let me do it.” He pouts, his hands fully open towards you wanting you to give him the insulin syringe, he’s been whining non-stop wanting to give you the injection so he can feel like he’s actually doing something to make you feel better.

“This is an actual needle not games and stuff.” You stand in front of the mirror, a second away from lifting up your night gown to inject the needle into your stomach.

“Baby please, just this time and I promise I won’t ask again.” He rushes to stand behind you and puts one hand onto your back. “I need to feel useful.”

“But you are.” You turn to face him, “You consider picking me up from the kitchen floor when I’m low not useful? You’re always useful.”

“Yeah, but please this is different, this is the actual thing that makes you feel better, can I please do it?” He begs, opening his hand again for you to give him the injection, you sigh and roll your eyes before finally handing it to him. “You’ll make your own dinner if you hurt me.”

“I promise I won’t.” His face changes and a large toothy smile sits on his face before he lands on his knees to pull up your night gown and open the needle cap. “Like that?” He pinches some of your flesh between two fingers. “Mhm.” You agree and push his hand a little to the left. “You have to do it fast so it won’t hurt.”

“I lost count to the times I’ve seen you do this baby, I know how it’s done.” He wholeheartedly injects the needle into your skin and you swear you didn’t feel a thing, before he pushes in the medication and takes the needle out. “That was so hot.” You giggle which makes him laugh shyly and kiss your tummy before pulling your night gown down.

-

JJK

Throughout your entire dinner with his friends from work and their wives, his eyes were watching you the whole time and the man knows you like the back of his hand, he can easily tell that your blood sugar is high from the your face is glistening and your hands are shaking, he even looks down underneath the table to see your legs shaking in their spot which makes him certain 100%.

He clears his throat and pulls his chair back. “Y/N baby, come on.�� He gets up onto his feet and grabs your purse. “If you excuse us, we’ll be back in a minute.”

You were always a procrastinator and you kept ignoring your symptoms and thought that you’ll be home later and you’ll take your medication then, but Jungkook was the exact opposite, his eyes were onto you the entire time, and mainly because he couldn’t get enough of you, and because he’s worried that you’ll get tired any second.

He pulls your chair for you and you get up onto your feet, excusing yourself away from the table, he wraps an arm around you and walks you towards the restrooms and picks you up to put you onto the sink. “Are you feeling well?” He asks when he knows the answer, he knows you can barely stand onto your feet.

“Not well, but I can make it through the night.” You run your fingers through his hair and tuck some behind his ear. “You can go to your friends, I’ll do it on my own.”

“Of course not.” He opens your purse and prepares the little injection of insulin before taking an alcohol swab out of his wallet. Yeah those were for you and he always had them lying around whether it was in his pocket, wallet or even in his car.

He wipes the back of your arm with the swab before injecting the medication into your skin, you’ve been together for a few years now and he insists on giving you the injection every time, he got so good at it that you don’t feel the needle anymore. “There you go.”

“Thank you.” You lock your eyes onto his, he smiles and leans in to kiss you on the lips. “I don’t know if the diabetes or not but you taste so sweet.”

You pull back from the kiss with a cringe on your face and hit his chest. “That’s not funny.”

[barbiewritesstuff]

Oooooohhh i have another one sorry :p

Asking cyclone to give you a hickey?? :p

--

I'm back :) sorry for going for so long but my mental health was (and still is a little) in shambles. Now that it's a little better, I'm returning to projects and I'm super excited to finish them and start new ones, than you all for you patience ❤❤❤

Mature content ahead, if you are under 18 I WILL YEET YOU

Taglist: @luckyladycreator2

--

"I don't like the way the others are looking at you, " he says, kissing your exposed shoulder. The bed sheets are covering your lower half as you scrolled through social media while laying on your tummy.

It's Sunday. The only day the two of you have off at the same time and that means it's the day you spend in bed, lazing about, chatting, watching tv and sleeping together. You love it. They're your favourite days, you wish you could commit them all into memory so you can spend the entirety of your sunset years replaying your favourite moments.

Sadly, this morning started off way too productive for your tastes. Beau got up early to walk his mother's dog, a disgusting little french bulldog named Leopold that you love very much and then stayed up to read a book instead of holding you close and falling back asleep. When you woke up he was sitting up against the headrest, his brand new reading glasses,which you teased him endlessly for, on the bridge of his nose, making him look like a college professor. Pouting because he didn't give you your morning cuddles, you had turned around to explore facebook and he had, very sneakily, gotten rid of the book and worked you out of your pijamas, kissing every inch of you to draw your attention to him.

It had almost worked. You were about to put the phone down when a text from your wingman had lit up the locked screen and Beau had been pulled away from his plans by a sudden insecurity.

"The others?" You asked, amused.

Beau wasn't usually the type to admit he was jealous. Truthfully, he's not usually the type to get jealous. After all, he has you in his bed, and they don't. He gets to fuck you into the small hours of the night and they don't. He gets to see you in the morning, still sore from the night before, bringing him his coffee. They don't. Really, he's not usually the type to get insecure. He knows you're his. And he trusts that you know it too.

The issue is that no matter how well the other pilots and naval staff know that you're his, it doesn't really seem to stop them much. They still flirt with you, they still gawk at you like starved men looking at a buffet, and a few brave (or stupid) ones still ask you out. It pisses him off.

"Seresin and all that," he answers, because admitting to you that the entire male half of the naval base is bothering him feels a little too possessive.

"Jealous, baby?" You ask, Beau doesn't answer. He tries to evade your question by resuming his kissing, moving himself so he's lying on top of you, his growing trouser tent resting against your already aching core. He nibbles the crook of your neck and then smoothes over the reddened area with a few gentle strokes of his tongue.

"Why don't you mark me up? Show them who I belong to," you add

"Like a hickey?" He asks, voice muffled by the flesh of your neck.

You hum in response. He grinds his hips against your ass a few times, slowly and carefully, making sure his entire length grazes where you need it most without actually giving you the pressure you want.

"Okay," he says, wasting no time to suck a purple bruise into your skin, and then another, and another. The trail of hickeys goes down until it reaches the waistband of your panties where his lips abandon their assignment to suck on something else until you see stars.

[pbandjesse]

I wish I could say I had a better day. I was happy to spend the day with James. We are good food. We painted pottery. We had milkshakes and went to goodwill. I took a nap. I made a bear. It should have been a really good day! But I was miserable inside. I tried really hard to shake it but I was really going through it.

I know irs because I was so exhausted. Yesterday was incredibly tough and then I struggled to fall asleep even though I was so tired. And it wasn't bad sleep. But I wanted more.

So when I woke up at 830 I was a little disoriented. I would dose until 9 and then was upset that James wasn't here. They said they would be back from their 40 mile bike ride before I woke up and the werent so I was confused. But then I found they left me a note. They had had to go back out to go to the museum because Kate, who will be working the front desk now, was locked out of the musuem. Because Phil was watching the TV in the maintenance office and didn't hear the door bell. So he's lost TV privileges.

I would get washed and dressed and was frustrated that it was so hot. It was hot everywhere. Our house is 85 degrees inside and in our bedroom even with the AC constantly on it is 78 degrees. Like if you are just right in front of the air you get cool but it's not cooling down the room. It sucks. It is just so wildly hot out that it's so hard to fight against it. I really hope it cools down soon. We were spoiled a few weeks ago. I miss it so bad.

James would come home while I was chilling in front of the ac. They would have to take a second shower and get dressed again. I felt annoyed for them. But they would look so cute in their new shirt. I was excited to spend the day together even if I wasn't feeling amazing.

We went to Hampden to have brunch. We went to Golden West and it was surprisingly not busy. James got hopi cakes and coffee and I got huevos rancheros and a soda. And it was so good but I only could eat half. We were looking at Pinterest for idea for our painted house numbers. And for our other project. The plan was to collaborate on the house numbers and then I would do a bowl and James would do a container for change.

I was also just eavesdropping on the conversations around us and enjoying watching people. And just being with my love. I was just so tired.

We got a box to take half my breakfast with us. I had hoped the food and caffeine would perk me up. But it didn't. I was determined to do the day we planned on. But I was struggling.

We got to amazing glaze 20 minutes after they opened. It wasn't busy yet but it would get busy in the hour and a half we were there.

I was surprised they didn't have any just plain tiles today. So we pivoted and I found a curly fancy N in their clearance box. And we would design that together. James would use my reference to draw out the numbers and I think the 1 looks like a 7 but it's fine. It's mainly for us. And we decided on a Maryland color pallet with the black eyed Susan's. And I really like how it came out. It was nice doing it together. But I am not going to lie. I was very close to fall apart. I was so tired. I was so miserable. I kept telling myself you are having a good time! You love this! But I was so sad. And so we just quietly worked. And I tried to be more positive even though I was falling apart.

We both made turtles which I thought was so cute. I based my bowl off of an anthropology bowl that had people swimming in a lake. I did a pond with turtles and frogs instead. And James did an egg with a sea turtle in it. So cute.

We finished up and paid and walked across the way to get milkshakes. James got a vanilla malt and I got "mintflix and chill" which is just a white mint chocolate with cookie pieces. It was very good. And felt nice to have something cool.

Our next stop was a good will to look for a Maryland T-shirt I could make a bear out of. But no luck. I would get a dress I think will be good for working events at the museum in the fall. And a cooler type bag that I liked the pattern of. I had $2.50 off so that was neat. Annoying we could t find a shirt but James offered a Hawaiian shirt they got at a baseball game. It wasn't exactly what I was picturing but it's something.

I just wanted to go home. I was upset that we were 20 minutes away. But I knew I would have to hold it together. And I did. And when we got home James would unload all my market stuff. And I would go put some stuff away and lay down.

James would come kiss my face and covered me with my fleece jacket. And then I fell asleep until 5.

When I woke up James was here. They were very sweet. I was feeling slightly better but still not amazing. I wanted to do something to feel accomplished. So I would work on putting away the clothes James had cleaned while I was sleeping. I decided I am not sleeping at camp this week. I was so full of anxiety about it. I wasn't able to prep my workshop (which I'm not even sure it happening, haven't heard from Parker yet on registration). So I just had to make the call but man do I feel bad about it. I feel like I'm failing but I just am not accomplishing anything when I'm staying at camp. It just feels like I'm wasting time. Like yes I'm saving the commute but at the cost of everything else.

I would also pick out clothes for me and Jess's cruise at the end of the month. She's got a pink and creme capsule wardrobe so I went for black and blue. I think we will look very cute together. And it was nice to pick out my favorite pieces that were summery but can be layered since we'll be in Canada and it'll be cooler. I cannot wait to be somewhere cooler.

I had wanted to start working on going through all of my clothes to donate stuff but I got so hot I just couldn't do it. I was having a very bad time I was so sweaty and sad. But I hope to do that in the fall. With help from Jess and maybe other friends. Just really pair down. It is so hard though.

James made me a salad for dinner. And they would come lay in bed with me and watch TikToks. But eventually we would have other things to do.

Brandon would come over and him and James would set up a projector and screen in the backyard to watch House of the dragon. I thought they were so cute out there watching their show.

I would do some organizing in the studio but pretty quickly I went down to the basement. And spent an hour sweating and organizing and trying to optimize the space. It's not perfect but I'm making good progress with what we have. I was proud of myself.

Once I was done I would take a shower. And spent some time measuring things to possibly move some furniture. But that is not a tonight project.

Now though I have winding down for sleep. Tomorrow is the first day of print making. I'm nervous! Like it will be fun but also. It can be a lot. It's going to be a mix of Styrofoam and erasers and small rubber stamp pads. I think it will be really interesting to see what happens.

I really hope it cools down. Its still calling for very hot but I can dream.

I hope you all have a good day tomorrow. I love you all. Good night!!

[selamat-linting]

so, i was enrolled in a vocational highschool. its the type of school that are halfway a tradeschool. its a program in my country that i quote here, meant to produce ready-made workers right out of the education system. the curriculum for every highschool major you took is different, but i personally never learn biology, geography and chemistry beyond the basics in middle school.

random aside over, for one year me and my classmates (computer programming major) had to share a classroom for normal school lessons with the guys majoring for heavy equipments engineering. one time there was an orientation presentation for them and we had to sit there as the teacher told them the kind of work theyre expected to do. so, theyre going to learn maths and physics and everything else so they know how to operate and fix industrial grade machinery like the massive trucks meant to ship coal around, mega structures to dig tunnels for mining operations.

during the last slide, the teacher showed them a slideshow of workplace deaths.. it was morbid, he said to us that death is inevitable on your line of work. its going to happen. of course we can minimize this by following safety codes, but accidents will happen.

and it doesnt register to me as weird at the time, but its stuck in my mind. like i had the vague sense that something wasnt right. and it isnt. like, he's showing kids that dying on the job, its a tragedy sure, but its normal. its fact of life. my country is an imperialized nation so they never try to lie about whats the purpose of our education. we are here to prepare for work, not to learn. and from the beginning, the oil and mining industry doesnt care about human life. and im thinking of the shares and stocks where all of those profits fueled by death eventually finds itself, in the pockets of men who might never see the inside of a oil tank. or where all the oils and minerals are heading, as i sit here waiting in a queue on the gas station to fill my motorbike even though there's an oil and coal processing site just a few hundred kilometers away still in border of my hometown.

worst part is i know this isnt the worst because someone out there who might even be younger than me is dying for the gasoline im getting, the circuit boards inside my phone, and i know one of my friends online is sleeping inside a car while office buildings and billboards stay lit and functional every day of the year fueled and powered by unimaginable amount of normalized deaths.

and im also thinking of the oil spills at the beach, the days that gets hotter and hotter every year. last year there was a gruesome car accident. an oil truck swerved off the sidewalk and killed a dozen people. its not the only major first accident in that place, as always the old complaints about public safety and roads came back for a while, and they might be satisfied that there's a barricade and a rule for large trucks not being allowed to be on the road during the day, but im also thinking of my friend who worked in the industry as a safety operator, complaining that half of the trucks are overdue for maintenance for years and the drivers license have expired but no one ever did anything about it because theyre on a constant deadline and spending time to do checks only makes the managers yell at you for missing a quota and you had to stay longer instead of getting some sleep or spending time with family, in a job where you already work 12 hours a day on average.

my point is, its all connected. just simply asking where the gas powering your car came from revealed a lot. i know this is retreading the basics but i think its good to remember how interconnected everything is. how the tragedies and genocides and social murders arent an aberration but a logical conclusion of the way society is organized. its a well oiled machine, excuse my pun. its all-encompassing, but seeing it as it is makes it easier to find its weak spot, areas where we can fight. this is why im a communist, specifically a marxist leninist, i do think workers' revolt with international proletariat society is the only way we could break free.

but anyway, all this is to brag about how i never learn geography in highschool and yet i can still name more countries and capitals than the average college student in the us so (⁠＾⁠3⁠＾). also now that i mention it i also never learn biology but i know more about the human body than your average terf so 😌 shitty schools is not an excuse 💖