Tumgik
#so much destruction in one frame
Text
Tumblr media
Whoever is doing these edits you need to seriously staph😭
Caus you are singlehandedly causing enough destruction
🌚
467 notes · View notes
Text
Everyone arguing about Stannis, JonCon, Jaime, god forbid Jorah being the 1000th commander of the NW….when it will be Jon again 🌚
#btw this is not stannerism like i do have legitimate reasons why i think it will be jon at the end#i think an interesting part of jon’s politiking as LC is him realizing how deep the rot is in the watch#he spends an entire book - agot - realizing that he institution he spent his childhood idolizing is not so glorious#he spends the next book directly confronting the issues that come with being a good man ( helping gilly#and being a true man to the watch and starting to notice the cracks in the system#and then asos is like the turning point you know?#adwd is him trying to fix the watch from within but failing imo because as i said the rot is far deeper#it doesnt matter how many people you replace the watch needs an overhaul - a complete uprooting to the core#which is why i dont like theories of him being a passive bystander as the watch crumbles#its just too narratively juicy if he takes a part in the destruction of the watch coz yknow some things need to be cleansed w/ fire n blood#a nice lil parallel to dany and what shell be doing in the east throughout winds#i like him as the 1000th lc because its a nice round number and thats a bit silly but its also signifying a renewal#Its a blank slate which is essential to jon because he does have a vision for the watch and the wildings!#and he can start from the ground up - and like one of the most underrated themes in jon’s arc is nation building#ive said before that i think the show kinda got it right….like we’ll see a weird mesh of lc of the nw and kbtw as jon’s endgame#I wont get into that now….but i know a lot of jon stans dont want him back at the wall because it seems needlessly cyclical and i get it#and i get that the watch isnt the most glorious place to be…but i really do think its meant to be a vehicle to explore themes of rebirth#and renewal which appear in jon’s arc -think of jon’s messianic framing and the watch being his “new earth” after all is said and done#not so much a place of punishment but a place to find new meaning and exist beyond many societal frameworks#for the cripples bastards and broken things….anywayyyyy lmaoo#asoiaf#jon snow
14 notes · View notes
burinazar · 7 months
Text
wondering how many more people in my circles i've accumulated enough Recommending-Things-To Credit to throw the hole show at them because i am dying for more sickos to show my things to
that 'write for an audience of thirty sickos' tweet is like aspirational to me because if i had that many (especially if a couple were like, Concrit-giving Sickos) i'd be really happy and not even slightly wish for a bigger audience. but it seems i can at most pull three-to-four sickos at a time and the prior sickos orbit away before new sickos come. Where Are My Thirty Sickos
2 notes · View notes
pyrriax · 1 year
Text
i love realizing just how flexible the concept of "betrayal" is.
(also i realized just how good this song is)
3 notes · View notes
imethirdperson · 3 months
Text
For real though there's definitely something there about the way iwtv is framing abuse and its trauma. The show is pushing the narrative that louis craves it like some kind of high, almost like an addict cause it redirects a great part of the blame to him. The entire concept of the show is kind of fucked for the way it frames like partner-abuse-redirected-to-the-children. Blaming louis and Armand equally for Claudia's death. Nah. It's a very hard mindset for me to get into
0 notes
ozzgin · 7 months
Note
Omg bro yk whats been on my mind for do long?? A demon king trying to court a hero reader. Like the hero has already fought and defeated the king but somehow he comes back and he's desperately trying to get the hero to join him (in more ways than one). He wants the reader to be his spouse and leader of his army against the corrupt human race and the reader (now fallen from stardom due to the evil kings defeat) just wants him gone and to be left alone. Idk if this makes sense but I need to see SOMEONE write abt it before I lose my last marble.
-Doll
This is giving me Dragon Quest vibes, haha. Not a trope I'm too familiar with, but it sounds interesting nonetheless. I shall do my best! Sorry for the delay, I hope it's close to what you imagined. :)
Yandere! Demon King x Hero! Reader
As it goes with villains, they always find a way to return. This time, the Demon King has a different plan in mind. You were prepared for anything, from evil schemes to ancient conjured weapons...except for a wedding ring cordially placed before you. Do you say yes?
Content: gender neutral reader, monster romance, 🔥proposal (literally)
[Part 2]
Tumblr media
You still remember everything so fondly. How you crawled out of that enormous crater, body battered and weak, as everyone watched in horror and held their breaths. Finally, you raised your fist victoriously. The Demon King had been, at last, defeated. The people cheered and cried and pulled you up under thundering waves of applause. Peace was no longer just a dream.
A sweet, innocent memory, even more so given its fleeting nature. The genuine smiles of gratitude quickly turned into crooked grins asking for favors. Before you knew it, you became some sort of political accessory to convince the masses. Posing for photos, shaking hands, being interviewed with bizarrely planned questions reeking of propaganda. You suddenly felt burdened, heavy, disappointed. This was not the kind of fame you envisioned for yourself.
Thus, you gradually vanished from the limelight, keeping your distance from everyone else and spending most days in solitude. Better than having to look into those unscrupulous, opportunistic eyes measuring up your worth. You had fulfilled your job and purpose.
This morning you're woken up by the sound of your belongings rattling in their shelves. The wooden frame of your bed is creaking, and you struggle to get up. An earthquake? A wave of nausea flushes over you. You recognize this feeling all too well, though you never expected to deal with it again. This is a disaster alright, yet the forces of nature have nothing to do with it.
You rush outside, swinging the door open and nearly tripping in your hurry to confirm your suspicions: the demonic creature is approaching your humble adobe with heavy steps, as the ground crumbles and shatters underneath. The Demon King himself, in flesh and blood. Although the blood splattering his armor is most likely not his. Same for the visceral remains threading his weapon. Regardless, your jaw tightens nervously, and you stand back, in a defensive pose. "You're a stubborn one", you say smugly, trying to maintain your composure. "Can't say I'm a fan of dying, that is correct." A ragged, monstrous voice erupts from the tall, armored figure.
"What brings you back?" You demand. The surroundings are too peaceful for him to have tampered with the city. Did he stop by to formally announce his destruction? "I have an offer that might interest you." The Dark Overlord has closed the distance between you, now looming above your much smaller body. You shiver. "I don't barter with Demons!" You conclude, turning around, prepared to leave. "Even when your precious people are on the line?" The horned beast warns with a grin. "If there's nothing better to do as a Ruler of Realms than killing petty humans..." You swiftly retort, going back into your house and slamming the door shut.
He stands for a moment, speechless. "Y-your Majesty? Should I take care of the humans, or (Y/N)?" Only now he notices his scaly butler, bowing to his side with claws resting over the weapon. The Demon King raises a hand, shooing the servant away. The annihilation of the human race can wait. There are more important matters to deal with presently. He'd expected your rejection, naturally, but not in such fashion. The indifference, the flat voice, the empty eyes devoid of emotion. Have the city dwellers tampered with his hero? He expected to see your fierce rage and in return he was met with a hollow shell.
Bright blue flames erupt from the openings of his armor, resulting in a menacing show of lights. He's known it for the longest time, of course. Humans are rotten to their very core. Vile, deceitful creatures that have slithered their way up, exuding undeserved arrogance. He's been trying to show you this very fact, yet you were blinded by naive faith. Your unwavering, honest heart that won him over has turned out to be your early demise. Not anymore. His vengefulness knows no bounds when it comes to traitors.
The sudden spike in temperature alerts you. Was it your rudeness that angered the Demon? You don't care anymore. Whatever happens to the city is out of your hands. And yet...you're buckling the straps of your old suit made for battle. Sword in hand, you gaze at your reflection. What could the Beast want? The fortified city no longer holds the value of its olden days. Just like you've left your hero days behind. Without much contemplation, you run out and head for the main gates. The path is paved with ash and rubble and your grip on the weapon tightens. Regret immediately wells up in your chest, ready to burst out. Is it too late? The entrance is engulfed in fire, charred corpses toppling against the ruins of the walls.
You reach the town hall - or rather, what remains of it - and face the Demon King. Has he gotten stronger since your last encounter? You hold your breath as the horned monster turns towards you. "I've tried to tell you, again and again. Time after time." He sighs, defeated. "Between the two of us, I'd say you were the stubborn one all along." His voice is softer than what you would've expected from someone that had just massacred an entire settlement. There's not a single scratch or sign of struggle. Was he merely holding back during your last fight? One thing is certain: you're his final obstacle. You raise your sword, determined. Hot sweat trickles down your face as the flames surround you. "Well, at least you've convinced yourself now, I hope. There's nothing left for you here." The Demon King lowers himself, extending a fist towards you. A spell? Secret weapon? Your leg muscles contract in anticipation.
His fingers open and stretch out, slowly. In his palm, a barely noticeable ring. Given the ridiculous size difference, you assume this is better fitting for a human. You stare at it in confusion, discerning the wedding vows carved in the noble metal. "What's the meaning of this?" You mutter, glancing at the Beast now resting on one knee before you. "What? Is it not your human custom?" He looks away for a moment, clicking his tongue. "That useless butler. He told me- Forget it! You are to return with me to my Kingdom. As my spouse."
Of all the things you've prepared yourself for...Your brows furrow and your mouth hangs open in shock.
What is your answer? The Demon King will not leave empty-handed.
5K notes · View notes
ambrosiagourmet · 8 months
Text
I love Izutsumi. She's got a great design, she's a fun addition to the main party, she adds some new tension, and she's honestly one of the reasons I read dungeon meshi in the first place. I mean, "the most cat to ever girl" is an extremely appealing hook to anyone who loves cats and girls (me, I love cats and girls).
However, while I have always liked Izutsumi, I finished the story kind of feeling like I didn't really get her. I felt like I had a decent grasp on her character an character arc (she's a traumatized teen given space to feel safe and open up, and because of that she realizes that she can't grow without letting go of the coping mechanisms she once needed). But I didn't feel like I really understood her role in the story as a whole.
She follows the group of her own accord, after a coincidental meeting and a misunderstanding of what they can do for her. She's never super invested in saving Falin, at least not compared to the rest of the group. Though they do help her escape Maizuru's shackles, and are clearly good for her in general, she doesn't really have a healing Moment with the group the way that Senshi does with the hippogriff soup.
And yet, she gets an entire chapter, the third-to-last chapter, dedicated to exploring her growth and future. She's the one who frames much of the falling action, who lets us check in with everyone. She's the one who helps talk Laios into accepting his role as king. She may join the story part way through, but she is there for most of it. So Izutsumi! What's your deal!?
Well, I think I've come up with an answer, at least for myself, that I really like. Two of them, even! Though they both really work together to form the overall point - Izutsumi is the character that most helps the story face towards the future. Here's why I think that.
So the first of these "ah-ha" moments was when I realized that Izutsumi really is the best supporting evidence for Laios' point about the good things that wouldn't have happened if Falin hadn't died.
Tumblr media
If Falin hadn't been eaten by the dragon, Izutsumi probably would still be a slave. It was because of Shuro and Laios' parties both being in the dungeon to rescue Falin, as well as Marcille's use of ancient magic in the resurrection, that she got the chance to escape. None of that would have been the case if Falin hadn't died. Shuro wouldn't have separated from the group and joined up with his retainers, Marcille wouldn't have revealed her knowledge of ancient magic, and Izutsumi never would have even met any of them. They are only part of her life because of Falin's death.
Though this isn't explicitly pointed out by Laios or Izutsumi in the scene, I do think you can very much feel the presence of it. For one, when Marcille reflects on the journey and how much it made her realize she didn't want to lose everyone, her relationship with Izutsumi is prominent:
Tumblr media
It's the main original group at the top and center, but when you read it right to left, it’s Izutsumi and Marcille who might catch your eye first. And it's specifically Marcille and Izutsumi's relationship on display here, not just Izutsumi's presence in the group in general.
Also, after Laios' statement about how none of their adventure would have happened without Falin dying, it is Izutsumi who gets the final word:
Tumblr media
Izutsumi is also the one here who is the most forward-facing. Chilchuck is trying to correct Laios, Senshi is focused on the immediate future, and Izutsumi is talking about her new goal.
And I want to talk about that goal in general as well, because it’s also interesting how it comes up. In that moment, everyone is trying to remind Marcille of her less destructive desires - to eat food, to share it with them, and to meet Chilchuck's family. All of which are previously established, existing desires. When prompted by Chilchuck to join in, however, Izutsumi offers something new:
Tumblr media
That's interesting, isn't it? It's kind of funny, of course, to see her rambling on about a completely new thing, her own personal motive, in the middle of everyone working together to reach out to Marcille. Izutsumi doesn't even know who Yaad is! But at the same time, it’s kind of meaningful. Amidst the focus on desires that everyone already had, she adds a completely new one to the mix. It’s even the final bridge that lets Laios reach Marcille.
It is, in fact, even an idea that comes back later to help out another lord of the dungeon. The idea of finding new goals and feeling new desires... this is exactly how Kabru reaches out to Mithrun, after the Winged Lion is gone
Tumblr media
So yeah, Izutsumi's presence here, both in what she's actively choosing to say as well as what she represents of the consequences of Falin's death, supports the story's ideas of moving forward. Of accepting the past, and finding new reasons to live.
Which is all really good, and that alone works pretty well as an answer to what Izutsumi's role in the story is.
But oh, oh. There's more. Something I realized after having thought of all this, because I still couldn't let go of the feeling that there was still something I was missing.
And as I reviewed the things I loved about Izutsumi - her sometimes unhealthy ways of coping with trauma, her struggles with isolation, her skill with fighting, her selfishness contrasted with the ways she grows to care for and protect the group, her perpetually guarded nature, born from the seeming impossibility of ever fitting in or finding a safe place to just be herself - I realized something.
Izutsumi...
is a foil to Falin.
Where Falin copes with isolation and trauma by being eternally caring and struggling to say no to people, Izutsumi copes by constantly saying no to everything she can. Falin is often considered selfless, but does have selfish desires that she can’t easily express until a moment of crisis. Izutsumi is delightfully selfish, but chooses to stick by her friends when they need her. They are both transformed, against their will, into partly monstrous hybrids, and they both will have to live with that - there is no undoing what has been done to them.
Falin anchors the group in the past. Izutsumi pulls them towards the future. Neither would find freedom without the other - it is Falin's death that leads to Izutsumi joining the party, and likewise, it is Izutsumi who inspires the realization of how they can save Falin.
Tumblr media
And Falin is her future, as much as Izutsumi is Falin's. Both learn to be a little more like each other, even though they never meet. Falin gets a little more selfish. Izutsumi gets a little more willing to bend.
In this context, I feel like I have finally started to understand just how important Izutsumi is to the story. She is a proof that they cannot just go back, and she is a clawed, happy-to-scratch-anyone-who-pisses-her-off reminder, at that. In any conversation about what the group wishes would have happened with Falin, she cannot be ignored or brushed aside.
She is a reminder that, even in the midst of a tragedy so big it feels like a shadow you will never escape, you have yet to met all the people you will love. Hell, some of those people might even be catgirls. We should all be so lucky.
4K notes · View notes
zvaigzdelasas · 2 months
Note
Do you have an analysis on Sinwar being the new politburo chief? Very unexpected choice.
Have a couple thoughts:
Dissolving more of the barrier between Hamas as a political organization & as an insurgent organization
Spitting in Israel's face who was hoping that a decapitation strike would leave hamas with a leader lacking broader political legitimacy in the organization or create divisions/deepen divisions between civilian governance & militant organization
Lessens the leverage Qatar has over Hamas as they were providing Haniyeh with refuge
Since Sinwar is (presumably) in Gaza, his presence will likely be used to justify decreasingly discriminate attacks even moreso than it was before
Likely much more uncompromising (not to imply Haniyeh was) in negotiations
Israel and the US will have to directly negotiate with someone they despise
Dropsite News describes sinwar as such:
Despite the sinister portrayals, Sinwar’s writings and media interviews indicate he is a complex thinker with clearly defined political objectives who believes in armed struggle as a means to an end. He gives the impression of a well-educated political militant, not a cult leader on a mass suicide crusade. “It's not this black image of Sinwar as a man with two horns living in the tunnels,” said Hamad, the Hamas official who worked directly with Sinwar for three years. “But in the time of war, he's very strong. This man is very strong. If he wants to fight, he fights seriously.”
In 1988, just months after Hamas was founded, Sinwar was arrested by Israeli forces and sentenced to four life sentences on charges he had personally murdered alleged Palestinian collaborators. During his 22 years in an Israeli prison, he became fluent in Hebrew and studied the history of the Israeli state, its political culture, and its intelligence and military apparatus. He translated by hand the memoirs of several former heads of the Israeli intelligence agency Shin Bet. “When I entered [prison], it was 1988, the Cold War was still going on. And here [in Palestine], the Intifada. To spread the latest news, we printed fliers. I came out, and I found the internet,” Sinwar told an Italian journalist in 2018. “But to be honest, I never came out—I have only changed prisons. And despite it all, the old one was much better than this one. I had water, electricity. I had so many books. Gaza is much tougher.”[...]
Sinwar, unlike leaders of Al Qaeda or ISIS, has regularly invoked international law and UN resolutions, exhibiting a nuanced understanding of the history of negotiations with Israel mediated by the U.S. and other nations. “Let's be clear: having an armed resistance is our right, under international law. But we don't only have rockets. We have been using a variety of means of resistance,” he said in the 2018 interview. “We make the headlines only with blood. And not only here. No blood, no news. But the problem is not our resistance, it is their occupation. With no occupation, we wouldn't have rockets. We wouldn't have stones, Molotov cocktails, nothing. We would all have a normal life."
Throughout 2018 and 2019, Sinwar endorsed the large-scale nonviolent protests along the walls and fences of Gaza known as the Great March of Return. “We believe that if we have a way to potentially resolve the conflict without destruction, we’re O.K. with that,” Sinwar said at a rare news conference in 2018. “We would prefer to earn our rights by soft and peaceful means. But we understand that if we are not given those rights, we are entitled to earn them by resistance.”[...]
After the end of Israel’s 11-day bombing campaign against Gaza, Sinwar spoke to VICE News and sought to frame the Palestinian struggle in a U.S. context, using recent cases of lethal police violence against African Americans. “The same type of racism that killed George Floyd is being used by [Israel] against the Palestinians in Jerusalem, the Sheikh Jarrah neighborhood, and in the West Bank. And by the burning of our children. And against the Gaza Strip through siege, murder, and starvation.”
And additionally (echoing the words of Hagari)
Support among Palestinians for Hamas and its Gaza leader Yahya Sinwar, according to the recent poll, “remains very high” and has increased during the past three months. At the same time, while two-thirds of Palestinians polled in the occupied territories believe that Hamas will “win the war,” only 48 percent of those in Gaza agreed.
Hamas has insisted the war cannot destroy its movement and will remain part of the tapestry of Palestinian factions governing its besieged and occupied territories. “What matters is that you finally realize that Hamas is here. That it exists. That there is no future without Hamas, there is no possible deal whatsoever, because we are part and parcel of this society, even if we lose the next elections,” Sinwar warned in 2018. “But we are a piece of Palestine. More than that, we are a piece of the history of the entire Arab world, which includes Islamists as well as seculars, nationalists, leftists.”
Daniel Hagari has also echoed this last bit [TimesOfIsrael is Israeli Private Media]
“Hamas is an idea, Hamas is a party. It’s rooted in the hearts of the people — anyone who thinks we can eliminate Hamas is wrong,” he continued.
Rumors are that Netanyahu is trying to figure out necromancy in order to bring Haniyeh back
Also check out this interview conducted by Vice
youtube
760 notes · View notes
foldingfittedsheets · 8 months
Text
You wouldn’t blame a crowbar for an act of destruction, you would blame the wielder. For this reason I can’t be held responsible for what happened to my friend Charlie’s bed. I was merely a tool that force was applied through.
It happened like this: Brendan, Charlie, and I decided to have a late night movie viewing at Charlie’s house. We watched The Hogfather and Groundhogs day and we stayed up until 4am. Then we were all too tired to drive home and crashed. I got the bed and the boys took the floor.
Four hours later, Charlie’s parents woke up. They learned that Charlie had people over. They. Were. Furious. Because unbeknownst to us it turned out they had swine flu. Charlie should had been quarantining not bringing people to his plague house. They ordered Charlie to kick us out that very moment.
Charlie came to rouse us. I am… not at my best in the morning hours. Four hours of sleep did not leave my disposition gruntled. Charlie began trying to rouse me to pretty much no avail. He pulled the covers off, shook me, tried to take my pillow, but I was a tiny ball of sleepy vicious rage. When he shook me I’m pretty sure I bit him.
I should be clear, I wasn’t really awake. A baseline function was taking place but no real actual thought. I was piloting on pure instinct and the instinct was: need more sleep. Charlie tried everything while Brendan watched in bemusement.
Finally Charlie got the idea that if he physically lifted me out of bed I’d go. He managed to get his hands under my arms and start dragging me off the bed.
Two things happened very quickly. My toes wrapped around the top of the railing to his bed frame, and I went limp everywhere else. Charlie staggered and almost dropped me, because holding a floppy corpse body is much harder than a tensed one, a fact I had learned from many roughhousing attacks by my brother.
He swore and then gamely started trying to drag me backward, thinking it would be easy to dislodge my toes from the bed frame. It was not. I’ve mentioned before that my toes are strong, but Charlie was flabbergasted that their grip on the bed was so strong that he couldn’t drag me away.
I was going on pure stubborn instinct. I did not want to leave the bed. Charlie was fully committed that a 90lb gremlin wasn’t going to beat him in a contest of strength with only her toes. So he pulled. And I held on.
Both of us were shocked when there was a tortured shriek of wood and something in the bed frame cracked. It was loud enough that I actually woke up. The rest of my brain surfaced in confusion to join the lizard brain whose only goal had been not to leave the bed.
I released my toes and took my own weight and Charlie and I stared at the bed.
“You ripped the railing off!”
“Well, no, you ripped the railing off, I was just the tool. If you hadn’t been pulling on me-“
“If you had just let go! What is up with your feet?!”
We griped as I readied myself to leave his plague house, joining his parents in being mad that Charlie hadn’t told us they were sick. I drove home to sleep more.
Over the years of our friendship Charlie still maintained that I broke the bed. I disagreed and think I was only the tool by which he broke the bed. Only you can decide who bears the most sin, the dragger or the dragee.
2K notes · View notes
branwinged · 2 months
Text
"dragons plant no trees" gets thrown around a lot as fact, but i think the veracity of that claim is still up for debate in the books. because dany (like bran and jon and many others) is a narrative symbol of hope and rebirth within the series because of her connection to dragons and fire, not in spite of it. this is because dragons in asoiaf have a much more expansive narrative function than simply 'nuke metaphor'. the 'exclusively weapons of war' image they have acquired breaks down immediately if you recall that the first thing dany does with them is begin dismantling an unjust status quo. she rallies the unsullied at the gates of astapor with cries of dracarys! dracarys! freedom! <- dragons as a symbol of hope and freedom for the persecuted. and obviously they've been built up as an oppositional force against the others. we're told when the last dragon died summers became shorter. in that respect the dragons, or more specifically, fire which is warmth which is passion—very much embodies life against the numbing, deadening threat of eternal winter that the others represent. but fire also consumes, which simultaneously makes dragons agents of destruction, or as adwd shows: the monsters who eat little girls and leave behind their bones. but when dany found herself chained to a false peace which effectively undid her cause in meereen, it was the dragon that rescued her and reignited her fire to fight back—which is to say that dragons represent a wealth of contradictions within the text and this is likely something grrm means to parallel with the others to some extent, by questioning their apparent narrative role as the one true evil. because i doubt the series is gearing up towards a spectacle-esque battle wherein our heroes get to practice righteous, easy violence on a monolithic army of monsters. that feels like it would undo a lot of asoiaf's preoccupation with investigating violence against socially acceptable targets, even if said target is ice sidhe. and this binary between a one true good and a one true evil, i.e. melisandre's philosophy ("if half an onion is black with rot, it is a rotten onion. a man is good or he is evil.") is not something the story takes as given.
instead there's this exchange between bran, jojen, and meera in asos: "but you just said you hated them." / "why can't it be both?" / because they're different. like night and day, or ice and fire." / "if ice can burn. then love and hate can mate."—and i think it's talking about reconciling two conflicting ideas. because the dream of an eternal summer is just as unsustainable as the threat of eternal winter. i think the battle for dawn is more about questions of seasonal harmony. the first line from agot's summary says, "long ago, in a time forgotten, a preternatural event threw the seasons out of balance", so it's not totally out of question for the series to end with that seasonal balance restored once more. and that question of balance and how it can be achieved then works as a metaphor for a bunch of other things. because asoiaf at its core is very interested in exploring big contradictions, like love and duty? how do you keep all your oaths without betraying someone you love? how can one hope for a just, rightful ruler in a world where the systems in place can never allow such a thing? how do dragons plant trees?
you cannot frame dany's arc as a binary choice between planting trees or embracing (dragon)fire. because the fire is hers, it is a part of her, that's who she is. and her character has always existed outside of rigid dichotomies. at the end of agot she had two options, resign herself to a life of seclusion as a widow or die with the last of her family in that pyre, instead she performed a miracle. presently, i think grrm means to explore necessary, revolutionary violence with her arc because you cannot deal with institutional slavery by simply negotiating with slavers like she does in adwd. and the consequences thereof because she's also been set up to be more reckless with dragonfire in the future. but i think there will be an eventual reconciliation there, between her dreams "to plant trees and watch them grow." and her role as the mother of dragons, as a revolutionary figure. because if ice can burn, then maybe dragons can plant trees. they'll learn how to.
561 notes · View notes
starlightxsvt · 1 month
Text
When A Villainess Loves | c.sc
Tumblr media
synopsis ➳ four years of obsessing over him. so what if he is taken. you don't mind being the villainess if it means you get to have him in the end. genre ➳ chaebol au, thriller, dark romance. pairing ➳ heir!seungcheol x villainess!f.reader wc ➳ 19.4k warnings ➳ manipulation, blackmail, cheating, guns, blood, destruction of evidence, murder, death of minor characters, cursing, accident, scarring, adoption, heavy make out, fingering, marking, every character is corrupt more or less basically, also for plot purposes reader's last name is kim.
Tumblr media
pick your poison babe
i'm poison either way
Tumblr media
When you met Choi Seungcheol for the very first time, you were 13 years old. 
One sunny afternoon, while making your way to your grandpa’s study with your homework clutched to your chest, you were graced by the sight of him. He was stepping out of the room after meeting with your grandpa when the sound of your footsteps prompted him to stop and regard you with curiosity, head tilted to a side. He was only 18 back then, full of dreams and passion as he prepared to move abroad to finish his degree before returning home to inherit his father’s company. 
“Hey,” he had said, unsurely. With a squeak, you ran away and hid in a nearby room, too shy to talk with a stranger. You remember him standing there for a moment, confused by your behaviour before slowly walking away with a shake of his head.
The second time you saw Seungcheol, you were 18 years old, five years after your first meeting. He had come back after finishing his degree and was preparing to take over his father's billion-dollar company. In celebration, Mr Choi threw a party inviting all his family and friends and since your grandfather was one of his oldest business partners, it was natural for you to be invited with him.
It was that fateful winter evening when you fell in love with Seungcheol for the very first time.
In all 18 years of your existence, dating never interested you. You preferred to keep to yourself, read and spend time with your grandpa. You had realized early on that observing and judging people was much more interesting than talking to them. Especially because no one could ever resist asking you about the big scar on your left cheek. It was irritating; the prodding gaze of strangers who stared at your scar with wonder, treating you like a science experiment. So it wasn’t surprising for you to grow up without having many friends. You didn’t need them anyway, you had your grandpa.
Life was mostly uneventful and you did not mind having it that way. But then, at 18, when you caught a glimpse of Seungcheol and the man he had become, you realized, your life would never be the same. The sight of him had thrown your heart into a frenzy, one you could never recover from.
Gone was the lean young boy with bright eyes and messy hair. In his place was a calm but serious man who knew how to command a room with just his presence. Everything about him; the way he moved, the way he talked, the way he brushed his hand through his slick black hair, the way his suit hugged his muscular frame made your stomach dip and heart throb. 
That evening, your sole focus was him, following him around the party with your eager eyes but too shy to go and talk to him. You remember uttering one word to him when he was talking to your grandfather and his eyes landed on you.
“Congratulations.” You had said, giving him your best smile while your stomach was tied up in knots.
He gave you a small smile and a nod before looking away but that little interaction was enough for you to fall head first for him and fill your long nights with dreams.
“He has grown up to be a fine man, no? Choi Corporation is in very good hands.” Your grandpa had commented.
You had to agree. 
Seungcheol was a fine man, the finest you had ever seen. So fine that the thoughts of him kept you awake at night, the memory of his smile filled your stomach with butterflies and made you want to write poetry about.
You had decided right then and there that you would make friends with him, grow close to him. It would have been easy to do since his father and your grandpa were already close.
Your plan began with you scouring the net, trying to find every possible information about him and the things that you could not find, you would discreetly ask your grandpa. You were going to set your plan in motion by visiting the golf ring where Seungcheol regularly golfed on weekends. On a Friday night in early February, as you were laying your golf outfit out for the next day with childish excitement, your grandpa came into your room to give you the worst news of your life.
Seungcheol was getting engaged that Sunday. 
To the only daughter of Lee Media, the country's biggest media company. The holy union was agreed upon by the elders of the family since it was beneficial for both parties and most importantly, the heirs had no objection. They grew up in each other's presence anyway.
Even worse, after the engagement, Seungcheol was moving to Hong Kong to better oversee the company business and when he was to return, the marriage would take place. 
That news would have made any normal person give up. It would have brought them back to their senses and forced them to focus on their own life.
You, however, did not.
Overnight, you were a changed woman. 
You attended his engagement party with a smile on your face and watched as he put the ring on that disgustingly beautiful woman’s finger. That day too you spoke to him briefly, congratulating him on his engagement and wishing him luck for his work abroad. With his fiancee, Sumin Lee, you talked plenty; initiating the conversation by introducing yourself and carrying it on by complimenting her dress and her ring. You did not miss the way her gaze would repeatedly fall on your scar, judgment and questions flashing in her eyes. Something was unsettling about that woman, something in the look of her eyes that made you want to scream and warn Seungcheol to stay away. 
You could not do that, of course.
Instead, you said goodbye to the man you loved and let him leave. 
Your game began after that. 
You played the first move by getting his number from your grandpa and texting him once he had left. 
Hi, it's ____. Hope you have reached safely. 
That was the first text you had sent him. 
When he replied, you struck up a conversation, asking for recommendations for golf sticks since you wanted to get into golfing. The rest was surprisingly easy. You bonded with him over golf even though in reality you could not give two shits about that boring sport. The conversations flowed naturally and you always made sure it keep things casual, asking for recommendations and advice on anything and everything as if he were a brother to you.
And like that, four years has gone by. 
You started living a life completely different from the one you had envisioned for yourself. 
Once upon a time, you wanted to be a librarian. You had no interest in overtaking your grandpa’s business and he had accepted that. In the last few years, however, your previous notion changed. You realized that you needed to take over the company and actually get on the field to continue playing the game you were enjoying. Your grandpa was dubious at first but for the last two years, you have been in the position of the vice president of Kim Associations and you must admit, you have been performing beyond what you thought you were capable of. Your grandpa, who has been extremely pleased with your work, resigned a little while ago and assured you of your capabilities to take over.
And finally, today is the day.
Your inauguration ceremony which will officially mark the beginning of your journey as the president of Kim Associations. 
“Are you ready, madam? The guests are all here.” Your assistant’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You blink, refocusing your attention on your reflection in the mirror. Combing your fingers through the strands of your hair that have been perfectly styled, you speak, “I’ll be out in a second, Yuna.”
“Yes, madam.” The door shuts quietly behind her.
Sucking in a deep breath, you stand up, carefully scanning your outfit in the mirror one last time. Pleased with how the white blazer and pants look on you, you strut out of the dressing room and into the hallway leading to the grand room where the guests await.
As soon as you can get over with the boring ceremony, you can move on to the bigger tasks. Seungcheol is supposed to return home this month which means your time is running out. As soon as he is here, the preparations for marriage will start and you cannot let that happen. You must act fast.
With the ending of your acceptance speech, you step down from the podium, slightly woozy because of the continuous camera flashes. Yuna holds out a bottle of water for you to take a quick sip. As you screw the lid closed, your eyes wander over the room before stopping.
A small gasp parts your lips.
On the other side of the hall, you see Seungcheol talking to your grandpa. 
As if sensing your stare he turns his head and his gaze matches yours. A beautiful smile sits on his lips, his eyes shining as he starts heading towards you with a large bouquet of flowers resting on his arm.
Time slows down, and everything around you fades into background noise. Breathlessly, you watch him, soaking in every minuscule detail and committing them to your memory. And lord, is he a vision. Dressed in a three piece grey suit, his freshly styled hair and his blinding smile, you briefly wonder if he is a fragment of your imagination.
You blink a couple of times to snap yourself back to reality before schooling your expression as he stands in front of you. 
“Congratulations, President Kim.” He grins, cheeky and proud as he offers you the comically large bouquet.
A huge smile kisses your lips as you accept the flowers. “Seungcheol, I am very pleasantly surprised.”
“That was the intention.” He laughs and it is then that you notice a figure standing right behind him. 
It is Sumin, of course, standing next to him with a plastic smile as she congratulates you.
Your mood sours but you don’t let it show.
“You were supposed to return later this month, no?” You peer inquisitively at your love.
“What can I say, business finished early.” He shrugs.
“Which is good because we have a wedding to plan, no honey?” Sumin slings her arms through his as she throws a flirty smile at him. His hand rests on hers and your blood boils.
“Of course.” Your smile is so fake your cheeks hurt. “It was lovely to see you, Seungcheol. I have some investors waiting over there for me. We will catch up later, okay?”
“Of course. Go ahead.”
You push past Sumin, immediately dropping the fake smile as your fingers grip the stem of the flowers in a chokehold.
-
One week passes by and you fail to make time to catch up with Seungcheol— one-on-one at least. As the new president, piles of work awaited you every day at the office that you had to get through. With the very little free time you had after work, you would text Seungcheol only to get a reply that he was busy preparing for the wedding or visiting his in-laws.
Tonight you were invited to dinner by Seungcheol’s father as he held a small dinner for his close friends and family. You went with the hopes of seeing Seungcheol which were quickly crushed after your arrival. Turns out he and Sumin were out of town for whatever reason and would be running late. The sight of Sumin’s family making themselves comfortable and their boisterous attitude prompted you to leave as soon as dinner was over.
Another bad day has come to an end.
You lie in your bed, wide awake even though it is well past midnight. The work that waits for you in the day ahead along with another myriad of meetings overwhelms you. Your grandpa has not been feeling well so you need to visit him. Plus, there is this tiny issue of Seungcheol getting married to Sumin. You are not sure how you should approach this issue. Creating a scandal is always a good idea but that would end up harming the man you love. Of course, there is always another option…
One thought leads to another which leads you to sleep. At the crack of dawn, you are jolted out of your sleep by what you first think is your alarm. Then you fathom it is your phone ringing.
The caller is the caretaker who lives with your grandpa.
With your heart suddenly beating like you just ran a marathon, you pick up the phone.
“Miss Kim, your grandfather had a stroke. We are on the way to the hospital.”
The next few hours are a blur. 
You have long lost your sense of time. After what feels like ages since you reached the hospital, you find yourself, along with some relatives, sitting in a sterile waiting room, the walls bleak and grey. 
The clock on the wall reads ten in the morning. No sunlight peeks through, however, because there are no windows where you sit.
“You should have something to eat,” your secretary quietly suggests standing next to you. Her words reach your ears but you fail to register them, staring blankly at the floor.
Life without your grandpa sounds weird. He is the only person on this planet you love and trust unconditionally, the only person who understands and loves you the same way you love him.
He cannot just die, can he?
A while later, you don’t know how long, the doctor comes to give a briefing about the patient's health. He says a lot of words which can be summarized as this: your grandfather had a stroke that caused him to fall into a sleep-like state. When he will wake up from this coma is unknown, it could be days, it could be months. For now, his condition is stable and you can only pray it stays the same.
And just like that, there is a sudden shift in your life as you fall into a new routine. Working from dawn to dusk and then spending the evenings next to your comatose grandpa, holding his hand and hoping he would wake up. People come to visit, including the Chois. On the first day that Seungcheol visited, you shed a tear in his embrace before returning to your hollow, expressionless self. Soon, days blend into weeks which transform into a month. 
You start becoming more accepting of your reality. A part of you wonders if this is how your grandpa is preparing you to live a life without him. He has always been in your life as a protective shadow since he adopted you at the age of ten. A car crash took your parents away from you when you were very young, so you never missed them. Your memories of your early childhood are next to non existent but after being adopted, every day was something worth remembering. A kind stranger welcomed you with open arms and legally became your grandfather. He was so much more than just a grandfather, though. He was akin to your parents, a best friend, a guardian.
How does one cope with losing such a precious person?
Life sure will not be fun without him judging from the rumours that you hear going around your company. The way the board of directors and shareholders keep hinting that you may be an unfit candidate to rule over the company in the absence of an experienced man like your grandpa.
Why? Because you are young and unmarried.
How sensible that sounds.
While you may not be getting married any time soon, Seungcheol definitely is. His wedding with Sumin is set in exactly three months which does not leave you with much time on your hands. Your grandpa’s collapse was a momentary distraction but at the same time, it was a learning experience. People started showing their true colours and it helped you come to a decision. 
You will play the long game and you will hit two birds with one stone.
_
The villa where Sumin’s party is taking place is situated a little outside the city. 
She has recently launched her own clothing line with the money given by her in-laws as a pre-wedding gift but that part is a secret to the public.
It is almost dinner time when you arrive and the party is in full swing with the music blasting and people covering almost every place of the villa. The place is mainly littered with influencers and models and you recognize a few familiar faces who approach you first to say hi. 
You see Sumin skirting around, talking to people animatedly, posing for pictures and ordering the staff around. She has not noticed you come in but you do not mind. You will be seeing her personally very soon.
Dinner finishes and you start saying your goodbyes, using a headache as your excuse. After ensuring everything is set and your plan is successfully in motion you head for the abandoned factory located about a couple hundred meters behind the villa. The place is quiet and poorly lit but best of all, it is a place without any CCTV cameras. People never bother to come here, one because it is an abandoned, dusty factory and two, it ends in a dead end which is also a junkyard pile.
The watch on your wrist reads five minutes to ten thirty which means Sumin will be here anytime soon.
You wait for her under the only lit lamppost in the area, watching the bugs fly around the light before fixing your wandering gaze on the autumn night sky, the faded echoes of the music from the party your background noise. The sky is glittering with stars tonight, you observe.
“Hello?” 
The sudden female voice makes you turn around.
Sumin is standing there with a confused look which quickly morphs into caution when she sees you. “So it was you? You asked me to come here?” She questions with a hint of annoyance as she holds up the note you left for her at the dinner table.
Come to the junkyard at ten thirty. If you tell anyone about this it will be very bad for you.
Your reply is a sweet smile which you know will aggravate her.
“Seriously, I don’t have time for your games. I have a party to get back to.” She huffs, crumpling your note and throwing it down to the ground.
“Of course you do,” you nod, stepping closer to her. She waits for you to elaborate but you deny her the pleasure, instead observing her with a mysterious smile. Her petite, thin frame is drowning in an unbuttoned pink fur jacket. Underneath that, she is dressed in a glittery pastel pink crop top and a matching mini skirt with knee-high boots. As if that wasn’t enough glitter, her eyeshadow and her brown hair are equally shining in glitter.
Life must be so fun for her.
“Hello? Care to explain why you brought me out here?” Sumin snaps two fingers before crossing her hands over her chest, and tapping the tip of her heel on the concrete.
You release a deep sigh before looking her straight in the eye. “Break up with Seungcheol.”
She blinks three times as she processes your words before letting out the biggest scoff of amusement. “Come again?”
“You heard me. Break up with him while I’m asking nicely.”
Sumin appears only more flabbergasted which she expresses with a high-pitched laughter bubbling up from her throat. “The audacity you have! Coming to my party and then calling me here with a threatening note only to tell me to break up with my fiance? Holy shit, you really are crazy!”
You silently watch her with your arms crossed, unamused. 
Her expression only grows brighter, lighting up with elation as if she just solved the world’s biggest mystery. “I wasn’t wrong! From the day I first saw you at my engagement party, I knew something was up with you. Your eyes were always following Seungcheol! You are delusional, thinking you can take him from me. Even if I break up with him, do you think he would take you as his wife? He treats you like a sister— no no, I’m being too kind. He tolerates you! You are a pesky little ant that keeps bothering him but he is kind enough not to crush you! You are so fucking unbelievable, ___.”
You warned her, she did not listen. Time to bring out the big guns. 
Reaching into your handbag, you pull out a small rectangular envelope before tossing it to the ground in front of her.
“What is it?” Sumin asks, raising an annoyed brow. You remain mute as you wait for her to pick it up. With a huff, she does so as she pries it open and pulls out the photos stacked inside. After flipping through only two of them, the colour drains from her face as she screams and drops them all from her hands.
“You! You bitch! Where did you get them from?” Sumin’s eyes are as wide as saucers accompanied by a look of sheer panic on her face that brings you immense joy.
“Oh sweet Sumin,” You smirk. “You should be careful when having an affair behind your fiancee’s back. You are a chaebol, after all. People are always watching.” 
“You psychopath!” She hisses, marching towards you. In a fit of wild rage, she grabs you by the collar and screams. “You think you can get away with blackmailing me! I am the future wife of the Choi Corporation’s president. Everyone will believe me. I can just claim those are fake and you are doing this out of jealousy!”
You cannot stifle a chuckle. Calmly, you grab her hands and hold them tight as you challenge, “Sumin, you are awfully noisy for a cheater. You know I can just send these to the press, right? No matter what your truth is, they are going to eat it up. Your reputation will forever be ruined along with Seungcheol’s. Do you think the Chois would let that happen? They would cut you off immediately.”
“You!” Sumin’s frustrated cry pierces the night silence. “You fucking scarred bitch! I will fucking kill you! Do you think my father would just let you go?”
You smirk. Gripping her hands tightly, you pry them off your collars before shoving her away. “You don’t get to touch me, you scheming cunt.”
Sumin stumbles back a few strides when you start taking slow steps towards her, your hands resting behind your back almost as if you were out on an afternoon stroll. A new look of horror sets on her face when you come closer and whisper in her ear, “I know that your daddy is broke. He has barely been keeping his company together for the last three years. The only reason you are marrying Seungcheol is so you can get half of his money and save yourself.”
A shaky breath comes out of her lips as Sumin steps back from you, her figure trembling. You smile, taking another step closer to her. “I also know the things your daddy did to keep this secret from getting out. But imagine what the Chois would do when they discover that your family— a bunch of thugs, was planning to use them from the very beginning. Partnership? Ha— That was never your intention. You just wanted to take advantage of Seungcheol and his company.”
Sumin keeps looking at you, eyes wide and full of disbelief, panting heavily. Her eyes are the personification of loathing and it creates a sense of achievement so big within you, you feel like bursting.
You have seen enough of her drama. 
Stepping even closer to her, you sneer. “Break up with Seungcheol before I ruin you and your entire family to the ground.”
“Never!” She yells, taking you by surprise and shoving you down onto the ground. The hard concrete scrapes your palms which you use to brace yourself, leaving behind a sharp sting.
“I am not going to break up with him! Choi Seungcheol is mine, you beast! My father may be bankrupt now but you don’t know what we are still capable of. We have gotten rid of insects like you many times before. It won’t be hard to shut your mouth forever, you bitch!” She hisses, looking down at you.
You roll your eyes, dusting off the dirt from your palms.
“If I were afraid of dying I never would have joined this game, Sumin.”
She sputters, gritting her teeth, eyes shining with tears of frustration, her hands forming fists. She glares at you for a long moment and you can see the gears shifting in her head through her expression as she gradually composes herself before looking down at the ground, shaking her head and laughing. “That is alright. I will start with your grandfather, then.”
The blood in your veins runs ice cold, making you suddenly grow stiff.
She continues to laugh. “That old man is already on life support. It won’t be abnormal if he dies suddenly, will it? Right now, in fact?’’ She grins, pulling out her mobile and teasingly shaking it in her hand. “What do you say? Should I make a call? Show you how easy it is for me?’’
You breathe in and out sharply, your hands forming fists at your sides. Before you can open your mouth, she continues.
“Oh right! I forgot something important. Before I kill him, you should know a secret, ___.”
You remain rooted to your spot, glaring at her. She grins. “Your grandfather, Kim Han Oh? He is your real grandfather, not a kind old man who happened to see you one day and adopted you.”
What?
A scoff of disbelief falls from your lips. “The fear of being exposed has made you crazy, no? You’re saying anything now.” You sigh, standing up and shaking off the dust from your clothes, almost feeling pity for the girl. There is no way she could be serious right now.
Sumin’s lips break into a larger grin as she slowly moves closer to you, her eyes flashing dangerously. “Oh, poor you! You know nothing, sweetheart. Kim Han Oh is your real grandfather. You are connected by blood. But that is not even the best part.” She stops to let out a giggle. “The best part is, you ended up in that orphanage because of him.”
In the eerie stillness of the night, the only sound is the sharp intake of your breath as your body grows stiff. “You are lying.” Your breath comes out uneven.
You wish your words came out stronger.
“Oh, ___. I wish I were. Your father had you out of wedlock. Your mother was a waitress at a bar when she met your father. When you were 3 years old, he finally decided to confess to your grandfather about his secret family, hoping he would accept you and your mom. He never did. He kicked you three out of his house and while returning from his place, the accident occurred.” Sumin pauses, inspecting your behaviour carefully. She tilts her chin up, pointing to your face, “That scar marring your face? You got it because of him, sweetheart.”
By now, your entire world has collapsed as your body starts shutting down, making your vision blurry as you lose your footing. You choke on your breath, trying to form words of disagreement which comes out as a pathetic whimper. Your hands search pointlessly for something to hold onto and with nothing around you, you fall back down on the ground, panting harshly.
The dim ray of the street light falling over you gets blocked by Sumin as she towers over you with a fiendish smile of victory. Sitting in front of you, she places one knee on the ground and rests her hand on the other. 
“It hurts, right? It will hurt more when I tell you that the Choi family is aware of this as well.”
Your eyes fly to her face, wide with alarm and despair.
“That’s right, they know what a filthy, low-born you are. Discarded by your grandfather and then taken back out of pity.” Her words are pure venom, each one hurting more than the last. “You prance around thinking you are the queen of the world, chosen among others because you have something special but in reality, you are a disgusting mutt who does not know her place.”
You cough which morphs into a sob as tears start to blur your vision. 
This is not how this was supposed to go. 
“How dare you,” Sumin breathes, reaching out her claws to tuck a piece of stray hair behind your ear, “even think of touching Seungcheol, hm? He is mine. Even if I fuck ten guys behind his back, he would choose me any day over someone like you.”
“Shut up!” You cry out.
Sumin chuckles. “You should not have poked your filthy nose in my business, ____. I have ruined you with just my words, now watch as I ruin Seungcheol right in front of you.”
“No!” You hiss, clutching her shoulders. She pries your hands off. “Oh yes. I will marry him and I will destroy him and everything he holds dear. Why? Because I can. Because this is my payback for thinking you can mess with me!”
Pushing you away, she stands up, giving you one last look of victory before marching away, the heels of her boots leaving behind echoes of mockery as you pant harshly.
At the last moment, you call out. “Sumin?’’
She turns around. “Ugh, what now—”
A gun goes off. 
If there was no silencer, the haunting echo would ripple through the night air. In its absence, there is a small click followed by an eerie stillness as Sumin drops to the ground, falling on her side with a clean bullet hole sitting on her forehead. 
Lowering the gun in your hand, you wipe your tears and stand up. Your handbag lies on the ground haphazardly and you pick it up, putting the gun inside like it was when you came here.
With a heavy sigh, you walk towards where her body lies and watch her remain still, looking at you with the blankest pair of eyes as rivulets of blood flow down her temple.
Surprisingly, you do not feel any remorse. For one second, before pulling the trigger, you hesitated, thinking this decision would come back to haunt you. Now, in the beautiful silence of the night, you do not. Somewhere deep down, you knew this was inevitable, hence you brought the gun.
“You should not have underestimated me if you knew where I came from. Filthy people like me will do filthy things for the people we love. We are villains.” You sigh. “Rest in peace, Sumin.” 
You spare one last look at her before walking away from the scene, picking up the photos and the note she dropped earlier on the ground along your way.
_
Morning comes faster than anticipated. 
As soon as you come downstairs after waking up, you find your secretary waiting for you with her tablet in her hands, standing at her usual spot even though it is the weekend. The look, however, on her face immediately tells you that the news of Sumin’s death has spread. Schooling your expression, you cross the stairs, heading straight for the kitchen. “Morning, Yuna. Is today not a Saturday?”
“Yes, madam. But…” She hesitates. “Did you hear the news?’’
“What news?” You pick up a glass of orange juice and sip on it. 
“Sumin was murdered. Kim Sumin.”
You widen your eyes, setting down the glass with a loud clank. “What?’’
“Yes,” Yuna fidgets as she steps closer to you, eyes shining with mischief as if she is about to share a big secret. “Last night. Apparently, she was shot in the head. The Lees and Chois have given out special orders. No news outlet knows the details of her murder. It is being kept under wraps.”
“I see. How unfortunate,” You stare at the ground before going back to finish your juice.
“Since she was murdered last night while the party was ongoing, the police will be questioning all the attendees. You will also get a call sometime soon.”
“Hm, I left early so I won’t be much help but sure.” You pretend to be absent-minded. “Anyway, is there anything in my schedule today?’’
Yuna opens her mouth to speak but you get her off with a raise of your hand, “Never mind, it doesn’t matter. Cancel it. I need to visit Seungcheol and see how he is doing. He should be at home, no?”
“Yes, madam.”
_
There is a sort of eerieness in the air when you step inside Seungcheol’s mansion. A mais greets you, announcing that Seungcheol is busy seeing a visitor in his study. You lie, telling her he is already expecting you and march towards his room, your heels clicking against the marble floor. You ponder whether it is your imagination that makes his otherwise magnificent home look dull. Maybe it is because of the dark weather outside along with the empty hallways and the lack of usual decorative lights that cast this entire place with a bleak, grey spell. It feels like you have entered the haunted castle of a prince mourning the death of his lover.
If only he knew she was not a lover but a witch.
The voices inside Seungcheol’s study are loud and frustrated enough that you can hear them from the outside quite clearly. Standing in front of the wooden double doors, you lean closer and easily identify Sumin’s father’s voice as he yells. “I need to know who is behind this as soon as possible!”
“Trust me when I say that I will get to the bottom of this.” Replies Seungcheol. “The one who killed her is also an enemy of the Choi family.”
How dramatic. 
You roll your eyes. Would he feel the same if he knew what she was doing behind his back?
“That is why I am telling you to trust me. You cannot make rash decisions now. I have employed a good friend of mine as the leading officer in this case. The truth will be out sooner or later.”
“It should be out soon! The bastard ruined us! He killed my daughter and ruined this entire family!” The old man keeps yelling.
You smirk. 
It is a she. 
He keeps going on about giving his trust to the Chois and telling Seungcheol that he has his full faith in him. You cannot help shaking your head in mirth. Of course, Mr. Lee will say that. He knows that the less he is involved in the investigation, the better because otherwise, all his dirty secrets will be uncovered. He just needs to act like a devastated father and let his daughter’s fiance take care of it.
As you sense their conversation coming to an end, you walk back a few steps, pretending as if you just arrived and are about to make your way inside. The door to the study opens as Mr. Lee steps out, frustrated, murmuring something under his breath. He does not look to be grieving at all which is not a surprise for you. You knew very well that Sumin was only a tool to get him what he wanted, money. 
You greet him with a sad expression but he is too busy thinking to himself that he absentmindedly sends a nod your way before marching away.
Once again, you grin. 
The entire situation keeps getting more hilarious.
With a deep breath, you take a moment to compose yourself before pushing the door and stepping inside his study. Seungcheol who was staring out the window with his hands on his hips turns around as he hears you step inside.
“___?” He is surprised.
Your heart skips a beat as his eyes meet yours. He looks beat down, like he did not get any sleep the whole night, his appearance dishevelled. His white shirt is crinkled, folded messily up to his arms, his hair unstyled and the slightest dust of stubble covering his chin. A glass of half-drunk whiskey sits on his desk.
For one horrible moment, you wonder if he loved Sumin. That would not be possible, this marriage was only a business deal.
“Hey,” You give him a sad smile which comes out genuinely. Stepping closer to him, you pull him in a gentle hug. “I heard the news this morning. I am so sorry.”
Seungcheol nods, reaching for the drink and finishing it in one go.
“Does the police have any leads?”
“No.” He grunts. “It is quite almost the perfect crime.”
Oh my.
“What do you mean?” 
“There is no CCTV footage. It was a blind spot that remained empty most of the time. Sumin did not receive any text messages and there is nothing on her phone that indicates any threats. The last footage of her is her leaving the party by herself and walking towards the abandoned factory. The crime scene was also clean as hell. There are no signs of struggle and the gun is yet to be found.” He grows more frustrated with each word.
You reach to rub his arm soothingly, “Give them some time, I am sure they will find something.”
“I fucking hope so.” He sighs, rubbing his face with his palms.
A grim pause settles in the air and it slowly becomes unnerving. You promptly ask, “Seungcheol?”
“Hm?’’ You calling his name brings him out of his head and makes him turn around to face you properly.
For a horrible moment, your throat closes up. 
As you look into his eyes, flashbacks of the previous night come to you in tsunami waves as you feel yourself slipping into an endless pit. 
You have tried your level best to keep the things Sumin revealed yesterday out of your mind but when you look at Seungcheol, a loathsome sense of betrayal overtakes you. At the same time, there is fear. You are terrified that the look in your eyes gives you away, telling him about the crime you committed last night. 
It is all-consuming, paralyzing. 
Amid the battle of words and thoughts inside your mind, you end up asking, “Did you love her?”
He frowns.
You hold your breath, watching and waiting. A look of offence seems to cover his face and you hate it. He should be saying that he did not love her, they were in an agreement of convenience and she was like a friend to him.
“Why do you ask?’’
You shrug, “No reason. I was just curious. I wonder what it feels like to lose a loved one.” You look away, putting on a face of ponder.
Seungcheol remains silent and you start accepting your defeat, realising he probably fell in love with her. 
What a horrible sensation.
“I was not in love with her if that is what you are asking. I was comfortable with her like a friend and I was happy to share my future with her. She was nice and kind and beautiful, so somewhere along the line I saw myself falling for her.”
For some reason, his words hurt more, despite him saying he is not in love with her. You detest that look in his eyes, a look that says he has transported back in time and is remembering her with fondness that you wish he would feel for you.
“I see,” you whisper. “Anyhow, I hope you find her killer. If you need any help, I am here.”
“Thanks,” he nods. “The police will probably drop by sometime to ask general questions.”
“Hm, I am happy to help even though I am not sure how helpful I can be.”
“It is just general procedure, so don't worry about it.”
“I am not.” You smile.
_
The next afternoon an officer in plain clothes pays a visit to your office. You have been expecting it and you welcome him in your space, offering him a seat on the large couch in the middle of your office room. As you sit down in front of him, an assistant brings two cups of tea before leaving you two alone in a room of silence minus the ticking of the clock.
The officer begins. “I am Sergeant Thomas. You probably know why I am here.”
“Yes, sergeant, I am aware.”
“Right.” He nods before producing a small notebook and a pen from his pocket.
“So this is a basic procedure. Please try to remember as many details as possible.”
“I will try my best,” You nod, crossing one leg over the other.
“Did you talk to the victim on the night of her murder?’’
“No. I arrived late and left early. Besides, she was already very busy talking to everyone.” Truth.
“Did you see anything different about her? Like she was uncomfortable or scared?’’
“No, she seemed to be her normal bubbly self.” Truth.
“Did anything unusual happen at the party?”
“Unusual?”
“Maybe any argument or fight? Between any of the attendees?” He shrugs.
“No, nothing like that.” You shake your head.
He nods. “And when did you leave the party?” 
“Around 9.45 pm.” Lie.
“Why did you leave early?’’
“I had a long work day and a headache was creeping up on me.” Lie.
“Right,” he nods, jotting something down in his notebook. “And when you were leaving did you see anyone suspicious around the area?”
“Not that I remember of, no.”
“Did you see the victim outside? Maybe with someone or by herself?”
“No.” 
The officer sighs loudly. “I guess that covers it.”
A smile creeps on your lips but you cover it by offering him a sympathetic look. “I suppose you have not found many leads yet.”
“Unfortunately so,” the man nods, sipping his tea. “This will be a tough case to break.”
You shift in your seat, “How did she die, if you don’t mind my asking.”
“She was shot in the head.”
You gasp, covering your mouth. “Oh no.”
He nods. “Thank you for your time, President Kim. If you remember anything else please contact me.” He stands up, holding out his card. You take it with a nod. “I will sergeant, thank you.”
“Good day, then.” He sends a nod your way before walking out of your office.
You watch him leave with a diabolic smile before crumpling his card and throwing it in the trash, heaving out a loud sigh.
Level one completed successfully.
_
2 months later
Life is mundane.
With your grandpa still being comatose and the investigation of Sumin’s murder coming to a standstill due to the lack of evidence, there is nothing to keep you on your toes. 
With the lapse of time, you had grown to be indifferent about everything. 
Until now, when debates have sparked about Seungcheol’s capability to lead the Choi Corporation. Finally, the time has come for you to make your second move.                                                   They have been facing a hard time, wavering stock prices and a heavy debate over being in favour or against Seungcheol as the company’s head. With Sumin’s murder and the end of the union with Lee Media, things are extremely unstable as the power-hungry board of trustees deems him unsuitable to lead the company. Not to mention rumours have been going around stating that the Choi family was behind Sumin’s murder.
Now is the perfect time to start working on the second half of your plan. You have been helping them secure investments, regularly sitting for meetings with Seungcheol and his dad to plan new projects. Your plan can now be initiated seamlessly.
Today is another one of those days and you, Seungcheol and his dad have come together in his office after work to go over the profits of the latest joint venture.
“This is good but we can do better.” Mr Choi says, setting down the sheets on the coffee table and rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Most shareholders are still against Seungcheol and they want quick results.”
At the mention of his name, the man sighs and looks at his father, exasperated. “Dad, we have gone over this. We need to keep working to rebuild what we have lost. And we’re starting to see results. The board will give up sooner or later.”
“We need something more solid, son. We need something right now to prove to everyone that Choi Corporation still has a very bright future.”
You cannot resist this perfect opportunity. 
Setting down the spreadsheet you were holding, you lean back on the couch and cross your arms before looking at Seungcheol. “You need to form a union.”
Seungcheol raises a thick brow. Mr Choi shuffles, peering at you inquisitively. You have to stifle a pleased smile. “Choi Corporation needs to form a long-term alliance with another big industry.” You pause. “And what better way to do that than through matrimony.”
There is a stretch of silence followed by your words.
Seungcheol scoffs, “What non—”
“Aha!” His father interrupts with a look of pure elation on his face. “You are so right! Why did I not think of this before…” The light in his face starts to diminish. “But which elite family would agree to ally with us now, unless…” An unmistakable flash of hope sparks in his eyes as he looks at you. 
Absolutely delighted, you wait for him to voice the words.
“___, would you… be willing to?” His voice is full of hope.
“Dad!” Seungcheol gasps, standing up and scowling at his father with bafflement.
Oh baby, you are yet to be surprised.
Completely ignoring Seungcheol’s outburst and holding eye contact with his father, you reply. “I would be honored to.”
“What?” Seungcheol whips his head at you.
“Then it is settled,” Mr. Choi stands up with a clap of his hands. “We need to start preparing.”
You finally let your gaze travel to Seungcheol who is looking at you like he cannot believe you just did that. There are unsaid questions in his eyes, mixed with confusion and maybe even suspicion which he does not get to voice because he is going after his father. “Dad, you cannot be serious. Sumin’s case is still unsolved and—”
“You can solve that after the engagement, no? It is important to save the company right now. I understand how you feel but this way we can secure your future. I have known ___’s grandfather for so long and this would be a perfect match.”
Seungcheol looks at his father, distraught. His mouth opens but he fails to form words, raking a frustrated hand through his hair instead.
Watching their interaction you know for sure, you have won this round as well.
-
The next day you pay Seungcheol a visit on your way home from work. When you step inside his mansion, there is a different air about you which is reflected in the way you walk; like you own the place. You find Seungcheol in his study as you expected, still dressed in work clothes as he sips a cup of coffee with his eyes trained on his laptop. For a moment, you let yourself admire the way he looks in that white shirt folded at the sleeves, the top two buttons undone and his perfectly messy hair that can only be made by continuously running his hands through it.
This man is going to be yours.
Knocking on his open door, you make your presence known and step in, “Hey there.”
Seungcheol looks up and when his eyes lock with yours you see the lack of shine they previously used to have when he saw you. There is also a change in his reaction as he greets you by simply uttering your name.
You had expected resistance from him so it is fine.
“I came to check up on you.” You state in your friendliest voice as you stop in front of his desk. Pointing towards the couch on your left, you ask. “May I?”
He nods, watching you sit down and place your crimson handbag on the mahogany coffee table. Then, he gets up and comes to take a seat on the couch opposite you.
“You don’t look well.” You start.
“Yes,” he watches you carefully. “I’ve been trying to adjust myself to the upcoming changes.”
You heave out a sigh. “Listen, I know you are not up for this change—’’
“That’s an understatement,’’ he remarks drily. 
You frown. “I don’t understand why you are mad at me.” You do not hide the indignation in your voice.
Seungcheol regards you silently and you can see that he is trying to hold back questions; questions he has about this sudden partnership, your prompt agreement and your intentions behind them. You see it all in his eyes and you know he does not voice them because they would hurt you, because his suspicion is just a form of his own resistance and he has no proof to back up his theories.
After a long moment, he exhales loudly, letting his head hang low before rubbing his face with his palm.
“This is just…too sudden.” He huffs out a breath before shaking his head. “I still cannot believe you and my dad just fixed my engagement right in front of me without asking me once.”
A small smile graces your lips. “Seungcheol, you know that I will not get engaged to you if you are not fully on board with this idea, right?”
You hold his gaze and notice how his features visibly soften as he nods. You continue. “I understand you are still hooked on what happened and I won’t force you to move on. This will just be a business partnership which will benefit both our companies.”
“You’re right.” Seungcheol murmurs, his eyes cast down as if he is lost in thought.
“Your father wants us to get engaged next week. Are you okay with that?”
Your words make him sit up straight, newfound determination sparkling in his eyes. “That works for me. How about you?”
“Me too.” You give him your most flattering smile.
-
You get engaged to Seungcheol on a Saturday. 
The ceremony is very small— almost nonexistent, taking place only in the presence of Seungcheol’s family, his secretary and yours. Somewhere within you, you sense an emptiness caused by the absence of your grandpa. At the same time, remembering him leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. You are still wrapping your head around the information Sumin revealed to you months ago. 
Of course, you did some digging and went deeper to find out about your parents, which you never thought you would do. You never thought you would long for them or feel sorry for them, but you do now. Still, the anger does not fade away. It won’t until you get to confront your grandpa, which is why he must wake up. He has to.                                                                                                                         
Immediately after the short engagement ceremony, an official statement is released from both of your companies, sending the press into a frenzy. They treat it as if it is the biggest happening of the decade, even bigger than Seungcheol’s previous engagement, writing hundreds of articles and gossip tabloids. The general public does not hold back either, coming up with various theories linking you, Seungcheol, and Sumin together. Many say that you will be the next victim of the Choi family— they will get rid of you like Sumin. 
Their words make you laugh. If the people knew the truth, what would they say? Would they understand you?
Probably not.
Which is fine, because your lifelong dream has come true.
You are going to marry Choi Seungcheol.
_
Just one week after your engagement, your grandpa wakes up from his coma. 
You are stepping out of the plane after returning from your business trip to Hong Kong when you check the text from your secretary. Your grandpa woke up from his coma two hours ago and is very stable now.
The news has you standing still for a moment. There are mixed feelings but the most prominent feeling you sense is dread. You wonder what he will say. Would anything he say make you love him the way you used to?
Probably not.
When you step into your grandpa’s VIP ward, it is crowded. Your secretary, your grandpa’s caretaker and your future father-in-law are already there, hovering around his bed.
“Look who is here finally!” Mr. Choi grins as he spots you, standing up from his seat that is right by your grandpa’s bed. “Come in, come in.”
Your grandpa is seated on the bed, his back supported by pillows, looking a lot better than the last time you saw him. As soon as he sees you step in, his eyes shine and a large smile spreads on his lips.
A piece of your heart breaks.
“I hope you don’t mind, ____. I have already told him the good news.” Mr Choi says mischievously and you force a smile at him.
“Mr. Choi, could I have a moment with my grandpa, in private?”
“Of course, of course!” He nods and ushers everyone out of the room. When the door closes behind you and the silence settles, you step towards the bed.
“____, come, come! Sit.” Your grandpa motions to the seat by his bed.
Once you are seated, he immediately captures your hand in his, his frail, bony fingers clasping yours tightly as his eyes shine with unshed tears. “Oh ___! So much has happened. How could I miss it all! My little girl got engaged and I missed it!”
You cannot bring yourself to meet his eyes and for some reason, he fails to spot your weird behaviour. He continues, “I have missed you so much. Did you miss me? The nurse told me you have not been visiting regularly.” He looks at you expectantly.
You have to swallow a hard lump in your throat when you finally speak. “Grandpa, we need to talk.”
He lets go of your hands, pinching his brows together. “What is wrong?”
“Is there a secret you are hiding from me?”
“What? What secret?” He scoffs. “What are you—”
“You are my real grandfather, aren’t you?” You snap.
Time stills for a moment. Your grandpa watches you, his eyes slowly widening with alarm as seconds tick by. “I…y-you—” He stammers, looking bewildered. 
You bite your lip hard to stop yourself from crying. “For the last two months, I have been waiting. Hoping, praying, that what I learned is not true even though everything pointed out otherwise. Please, tell me I am wrong. Tell me I am misunderstanding, please! Tell me you did not lie to me, grandpa!” 
By now tears are rolling down your cheeks as you grab his hands in a desperate hold. He does not meet your gaze, looking down instead as he tries to stifle a sob.
“Why did you do it?” Messy tears blur your vision as you shake him, trying to make him look at you. “Why did you hate my parents so much? Why did you hate me so much, tell me!”
“I did not hate you, please— I…I did not know better.” He pleads, holding your hands. “I…I expected better things from your father. He was never the son I wanted him to be and when I found out he had a hidden family, I…I just lost it. I did not want them to die, you have to believe me.” His eyes are wide, his grip on your hands tightening as the desperation comes off him in waves. 
“I felt so guilty that I…I could not look at you. You were so young and the accident left you with that scar and I felt responsible for it. So I sent you to that orphanage but that did not ease my guilt either. I sent you away but I did not forget you. I did not abandon you, I swear! I always had my eyes on you and I made sure you were taken care of. Years went by and as you grew up, I saw what an amazing future you had ahead of you. You— you were good at everything! So I decided to adopt you, give you the opportunity to fill out your potential—
“So I was an investment?” You cut him off with a glare.
“No!” Your grandpa begs. “It wasn’t like that! I…I learned to overlook my guilt. I…I did it out of love, ___. I was miserable without you. You have to believe me.” His eyes hold so much hope and desperation yet every word he says makes him appear more like a stranger to you.
“I don’t care!” You yell, snatching your hands from his grip. The rage flowing through your blood prevents you from remaining seated. You stand on your feet and look down at him, your teeth gritting in anger. “I don’t care if you did it out of love! You lied to me. If you loved me, you would have told me the truth when I was old enough. Did you think I never would have found out? Do you…do you know how awful it made me feel when I heard it from a fucking stranger!” The rage, the betrayal, the frustration you feel is maddening. 
“My child, please, I’m sorry. Just listen—” Your grandpa’s pleas to listen fall deaf on your ears as you glower at him. How could he do that to you? How could he do that to your parents? How is it possible that your heart is ripping apart in pain for two people you don’t even remember?
Absentmindedly, your hand reaches to touch the faded scar on your left cheek, the surface still slightly bumpy to the touch.
Your grandpa grabs your hand once more, breaking the train of your thoughts. As soon as he touches you, you step back, snatching your hand away from his grip.
“___, please, listen to me.” He begs. 
“No,” you shake your head. “I loved you. You were my rock, grandpa. And this is how you repay me?”
The longer you look at him, the crueler you find yourself becoming. The man you have known your entire life starts to appear more and more unfamiliar. Wiping all the tears from your face, you take a deep, shuddering breath. Your hands curl into fists as you look him straight in the eye and announce. “You are not invited to the wedding.”
“What?” He gasps, his mouth hanging agape as one of his hands reaches out to try to grab onto you.
“You heard me. Don’t try to contact me. If I want to see you again, I will come find you.”
You don’t look back as you storm out of the room. 
The old man’s pitiful sobs do not make you turn around as you block the noises by loudly shutting the door behind you.
The first thing you do when you get back home is open a bottle of wine. Chugging a quarter of it, you plop down on the cold living room floor. 
Your phone vibrates with a new message inside your pocket and with an annoyed grunt, you fish it out. There is a missed call from Seungcheol followed by a message from him saying how happy he is that your grandpa woke up. Along with it, there are a bunch of texts from different people in your company and other firms, telling you how glad they are for you and what gifts they have sent for your grandpa.
It is aggravating. In a fit of rage, you hurl your phone away as it hits the couch first before dropping face-down on the floor.
Fuck them all.
You down more of the red liquid, finding the bitter taste oddly addictive. The more you drink the sweeter it tastes as a soothing haziness settles in your brain that numbs every feeling, every thought you had. 
With the bottle almost empty and clutched to your chest, you soon fall asleep on the floor.
Next thing you know, you are violently being shaken awake from your slumber. 
The first thing you feel is a raging headache that leaves your vision blurry for a few solid seconds. When you regain it, you find Yuna hovering over you, grabbing your shoulders. Behind her, you spot the worried face of your housekeeper, Mrs. Min.
Your secretary keeps saying something but the throbbing headache prevents you from hearing any of it as you struggle to sit up straight. Taking a deep, staggering breath, you squeeze your eyes shut before opening them again.
“Madam, are you okay? Can you hear me?”
You finally manage to look at her straight. “Fuck— what is it Yuna? What are you doing here? What time is it?”
“It is 2 am, madam. We have been trying to reach you for the past two hours. Your fiancee is on his way. You were not opening the door so I called your housekeeper to let me in.”
Right, Mrs. Min knows your code.
“I don’t understand, what is the emergency?” You sigh, irately rubbing your temples to ease the headache.
“Madam,” your secretary pauses and you have to force yourself to lift your head again and look at her. “Your grandfather passed away two hours ago.”
Suddenly, your mind is clear.
Your body stiffens, and the headache instantly fades into thin air. You are more alert than you have ever been before.
Wide-eyed, you stare at her, waiting for something you don’t know. Maybe she will say that it is a prank, maybe you will wake up any moment from this nightmare, maybe she will repeat herself and you will realise you heard wrong.
None of that happens.
Yuna continues. “I am really sorry. He was in his sleep when his heart rate suddenly spiked before stopping. They could not bring him back.”
You pick yourself up from the ground before gently sitting down on the couch, your eyes trained on the blank wall ahead of you. An agonizing wave of anguish swallows your whole being as a gaping hole of numbness spreads within you with the passing of each second.
You don’t blink. You don’t move. You don’t cry.
You sit and stare at the wall until your secretary offers. “Should I drive you to the hospital?”
You nod.
“Would you like me to call Mr Choi and tell him to meet you there?”
You nod again.
-
At noon, the funeral ceremony comes to an end.
You get a glimpse of the fruitful life your grandpa lived by the number of guests who come to give you their condolences. 
Thankfully, Seungcheol and his dad took over early on as they ran the ceremony and managed the guests while you sat in a corner in silence. 
The entire ceremony finishes without you shedding a single tear. Neither do you cry in the car as Seungcheol drives you home.
However, the minute you step into your penthouse and tread sluggishly to your bedroom, you spot the photo of you and your grandpa on your nightstand and finally break down.
Holding the photo frame tightly against your chest, you curl into a ball on the floor and howl like a dying creature. Tremors wrack your body as your sob intensifies along with the soul-crushing remorse and pain for what you have lost. 
Perhaps it is your ruinous crying that makes Seungcheol knock on your door as he steps in with a mug of hot tea and finds you curled up and wailing on the floor.
He looks distressed and unsure for a moment, debating whether to give you some privacy before going against it. Instead, he comes closer and sets the mug down on the nightstand before gently placing a hand on your shoulder. 
You continue weeping and Seungcheol slowly maneuvers your feeble body into a sitting position before he scoops you up and sets you down on the bed. But he doesn’t let you go. His arm remains a firm hold around your body and without thinking you wrap your arms around his neck as tightly as humanly possible, trying to bury yourself and your sorrows in his body. Your action makes him only embrace you tighter as he uses one hand to stroke your hair repeatedly in an attempt to comfort you.
“I fought with him the last time I saw him,” you yawl between sobs, face mushed in Seungcheol’s shoulder. “I fought with him, Cheol! He hates me…he will never forgive me.”
“Hush, hush now.” Seungcheol soothes, holding you tighter if that is even possible. “It is alright. He knows how much you love him, ___. He could never be mad at you.”
“I should have told him how much I loved him!” You howl, digging your fingernails into his back. “What have I done, Cheol? How could I do that?”
“It is alright. Everything will be okay.” Seungcheol chants repeatedly while tenderly rocking your limp frame, allowing you to cry your heart out. The tears that had not flowed in the last ten hours pour out ceaselessly, making a mess on Seungcheol’s jacket.
Time ticks by. The tea grows cold. The sun starts to lower in the sky.
When you have finally calmed down and can breathe without choking from tears, Seungcheol lets you go. 
He sits in silence next to you as you wipe your tears and snot using his handkerchief. 
“You should eat something.” He whispers. You shake your head, crumpling the piece of cloth in your hands as you gaze at it in a blank stare.
Next to you, Seungcheol sighs. “Would you like to lie down for a bit? I will give you some privacy.” He stands up but you immediately pull him back down before wrapping your arms around him and resting your head on his chest. His arms snake around your body once more as you listen to his heartbeat.
You realize how glad you are to have him next to you. How could you ever go through a day like today without him holding you in his arms?
“Thank you,” your voice is the faintest whisper of gratitude. For a moment, you think he did not hear you but then he shifts, cupping your cheek as you look up at him. 
“You don’t have to thank me. I am sorry this is all I can do.” He tenderly brushes a thumb over the scar on your cheek, making your heart soar. 
You immediately shake your head. “You are doing so much.” You whisper, eyes trailing down to his lips. Mirroring your gaze, Seungcheol’s eyes also travel to your lips and unconsciously, you find yourself leaning a tad bit closer to him. Once again, he mirrors your actions.
Your eyes fall closed and a moment later, you feel Seungcheol’s soft lips against yours. The kiss is tender and shy as if the waters are being tested. You lean in, grabbing the lapels of his jacket to bring him closer. Against your touch, his body relaxes as the kiss deepens, drawing out a soft moan from you. You taste peppermint on his tongue, a sigh of pleasure escaping your lips when he returns your kiss with equal fervent, exploring your mouth.
The kiss is beautifully breathtaking. It is everything you imagined and more, your late night fantasies gift-wrapped in a pink bow. 
Seungcheol is the first one to pull back as the two of you pant for air, still holding on to each other. His eyes trace all over your face as if he is trying to remember every small detail about you. You do the same, peering at him through your lashes as your thumb strokes his cheek and you lean in for another kiss.
This time, it is more passionate as Seungcheol envelops you with his body, gently pushing you behind so that your back meets the mattress. He lays on top of you, one hand holding on to the nape of your neck while the other explores your body, moving from your waist down to your legs. His warm hand traces down your leg under your skirt before coming back up as he squeezes your thigh.
A moan falls from your lips, breaking the kiss and he uses the opportunity to bite your lip softly. 
His eyes lock with yours for a moment, his hand hovering near your inner thigh as he silently waits for your permission. You comply, reattaching his mouth on yours and opening your legs wider as he gives the flesh of your thigh a particularly harsh squeeze, the pad of his thumb stroking your inner thigh, so close to where you want him to touch you.
Then, you feel the warmth of his fingers over your core before he cups your pussy over your panties.
You whimper. “Please.”
“What?” He mouths against your lips.
“Touch me,” you reply, chasing his lips to reconnect with yours.
Seungcheol obeys you, his fingers slipping underneath your panties and brushing against your pussy. The sensation, the touch you have craved for so long makes you jolt in pleasure, a shaky breath falling from your lips. His biceps become your anchor as you grip them firmly to ground yourself. 
Seungcheol’s lips trace your jaw before trailing down your neck while his fingers rub your pussy. Your hips writhe, chasing his touch while he peppers your neck with kisses before fixing on a particular spot beneath your ear that makes you whimper. Then, he pushes one finger in, dark eyes trained on you as your pleasure amplifies. 
“Yes,” you shut your eyes closed, revelling the feeling of his finger inside you. Soon, one finger becomes two and he slowly moves them in and out of you. One of your legs wraps around his waist while you pull him closer to smash your lips against his. Your tongue meets his with a fiery passion, an urgency to claim his as yours. Inside you, his fingers pick up the pace, making your body taught as you start climbing your high. 
“C-Cheol…” You pant, looking at him with pleading eyes even though you are unsure if you want to come right now or draw it out.
“Hm?” He hums, eyes hazy with a film of lust. As if teasing you, his thumb brushes over your clit ever so slightly, drawing out a shuddering whine from your lips that makes him chuckle quietly. The sound feels like magic to your ears, a drug to your system that heightens your pleasure. His teeth dig into the soft flesh of your neck, undoubtedly leaving a mark.
“Please,” you heave, clutching his shoulder with one hand and wrapping the other around the broad expanse of his back. Humming against your neck, he uses his fingers to rub an even deeper spot inside you as his thumb rubs your clit mercilessly. 
“Oh fuck, yes,” You hiss, throwing your head back, your toes curling as you clutch him tighter. “I’m gonna come.”
“Do it then,” his voice is a quiet order. 
He curls his fingers inside you and flicks your clit hard which does the job for you. Your release is a tidal wave of mind-breaking pleasure as your body goes tense, your hips arching off the bed, your mouth hanging open as a reaction to the overwhelming pleasure. 
The onslaught of pleasure leaves your vision blurry with unshed tears and your mind numb to everything as you slowly descend from the throes of heavenly bliss. 
When your mind has regained some clarity, you see Seungchol still lying on top of you, his eyes locked in on your lips which he is touching with the fingers that were inside of you mere moments ago. Without breaking eye contact with him, you gently hold his hand and push his index and middle finger inside your mouth, sucking them. Seungcheol’s adam’s apple bobs, his eyes flickering with impure intentions that are clearly expressed from his hard-on digging into your belly.
Sucking his fingers clean, you pop them off your mouth, your hand still holding his. Your fingers trace over his knuckles and veins, your eyes never daring to stray from his. It is as if a sudden spell has been cast on the two of you that has locked you in a trance of breathless admiration. It is a shame all good moments must come to an end.
As if zapped by electricity, Seungcheol suddenly pulls his hand out of yours as he gets off your body. The air in the room suddenly shifts to slight awkwardness as Seungcheol blinks furiously, adjusting his pants.
“I…I am sorry.” He mutters, not looking at you as you sit up on the bed. “You were mourning. I should not have done that.”
“I asked you to.” You state with a frown. Does he regret it? “I needed to forget…things for a moment.”
Seungcheol’s eyes finally meet yours as a sigh escapes from his lips and he nods, looking unsure. “Right…”
“I liked it a lot.” You find yourself saying. The look in your eyes is heated, mirroring a newfound fire of desire he has lit within you. Seungcheol swallows, gaze transfixed on you before he clears his throat, the look in his eyes shifting.
“Get some rest.” He whispers, walking out of the room and gently shutting the door behind him.
-
Turns out one can live with soul-crushing guilt.
It has been a week since your grandpa’s death and you find yourself slowly falling back into your old routine. As the days pass by slowly, the pain somewhat lessens but your guilt remains the same, your conscience constantly reminding you of what could have been if you behaved differently with him that day.
That is an answer you will never receive because what is gone is gone, and you are forcing yourself to learn to live with it.
Things with Seungcheol are slightly tense as well. After that particular moment you two shared last week, he has been avoidant. Since that day there has not been any one-on-one interaction between the two of you as he has been checking up on you from time to time with brief text messages. His aloofness has bothered you of course but you have decided not to let it get to you, happy with the fading mark he left on your neck and the memories of that afternoon.
That is why, on a Tuesday afternoon at your office, Seungcheol’s sudden visit surprises you because it is the last place you would expect him to show up. 
You straighten up in your chair, palms resting on the armrest as he marches into your office, dressed in his regular office wear that is covered underneath a long black trenchcoat, an odd sort of hurry in his steps. 
Your silly assumption that he is here to take you on a surprise date quickly changes when you notice the expression on his face. His jaw is clenched, brows knitted in a frown as he regards you with an accusatory glare.
“Seungcheol?” You stand up behind your desk. “Hey, what brings you here?”
Seungcheol’s brisk steps eat up the rest of the distance as he stands in front of your desk, sparing little space between the two of you. Instead of replying, his eyes remain fixed on you for a moment too long, making you hold your breath. 
Your gut senses severe doom from how he regards you, an unfathomable look in his eyes. Finally, he interrogates. “Is there something you are hiding from me, ___?”
“What?” You blink, stumped. “Why would you ask that?”
Seungcheol falls into silence once again as your mind starts running rampant. No matter how desperately you try to convince yourself that he could not possibly be talking about that thing, your mind ends up going there. The silence and the foreign look in his eyes make your fear unimaginably real with each passing second.
“I need you to be honest with me.” He says as he inhales deeply, as if trying to hold his emotions at bay, his eyes never straying from yours. “Please. I am giving you a chance.”
Your heart runs a mile a minute as you suddenly find yourself at a loss for words. The entirety of your body grows as stiff as a board while you find yourself falling into a bottomless pit of ruination. Seungcheol remains unmoving, watching you with a pointed gaze as you struggle to read him, struggle to find the right words. You feel so naked, so transparent right now as if he can read everything fleeting through your mind. 
Damn it, how did he find out?
“Madam, the board meeting started five minutes ago.” 
A sharp inhale transports you out of your spiralling mind as you whip your head away from Seungcheol when your secretary peers into the room with the reminder. 
Like you have been struck by lightning, your body jolts. “Y-yes, I am coming. Give me a minute.” You give her a look of dismissal before focusing on your fiance. In your most composed voice, you say, “I don’t know what this is about, Cheol but we can continue this conversation—”
“I will send you an address.” He cuts you off with a seething glare, stepping away from your desk as if he is about to leave. “You will be there at 9 pm, ___.” There is no room for arguments.
He leaves before you can form an answer and you stand rooted in your spot with tremors in your hands and a parched throat, your feet suddenly too heavy to move. 
You deep down knew this would happen one day, didn’t you? 
You would be found sooner or later but you never wished to be caught by Seungcheol. You would have much preferred to be caught by the police and given a life sentence. At least that way, you did not have to face him.
“Madam?” There is a knock on your door once again, making you jump.
“Damn it, Yuna! I said give me a minute!”
_
It is one minute to nine pm when you arrive at the location Seungcheol had sent you earlier in the day. You realized karma had gotten you when you clicked on the location and realised it was the exact place where Sumin died. 
The world stopped spinning for a moment too long.
Out of pure shock, you dropped your phone from your hands as your knees gave out and you fell to the ground, the realization that everything is coming to an end too much for you to fathom.
Surprisingly, though, it has been easy for you after the initial shock wore off. You had accepted your fate.
Gladly, in fact.
No more pretending now. It is a relief. He knows the real you and whatever decision he makes now, you will accept it gladly. You do not feel remorse for what you have done and you do not see a point in hiding anymore.
And so, you sit in your car, parked a few meters away from the place where he called you. Seungcheol is already here, his car parked a few feet ahead of yours. When you glance at the dashboard clock, you see it is two minutes past nine.
With a loud sigh, you pop the muscles in your neck before stepping out of the car. A gust of chilly air flows by, making you shiver slightly. With your hands fisted in the pockets of your trench coat, you walk ahead, the sound of your heels against the granite your only company.
All too soon, you find yourself in front of that abandoned factory and when you look left, it feels like deja vu. Seungcheol stands there, underneath that yellow street lamp, right where Sumin stood that night. 
Your eyes meet his, cold and unblinking and if you did not know any better, you would think he was a statue. A very mesmerising one.
You inhale a lungful of the cold night air before turning left and walking towards him, trying your best to ignore the subtle tremble in your legs. With a few feet of distance left between the two of you, you come to a stop and breathe. “Good evening, Cheol.”
He keeps looking at you impassively but you start noticing the minute changes in his eyes. They shift from disappointment to betrayal to anger and you know very well what lies ahead of you. 
Yet, you are unreasonably calm; so calm that you surprise yourself.
Just when you are preparing to start the conversation since he is immobile, Seungcheol reaches into his coat pocket to fish out his phone. His brows tangle in a soft furrow as he scrolls through it before lowering his hand and gently tossing it on the ground, a few steps away from your feet. The device remains face-up on the ground as a video plays.
A dash cam footage from the night of Sumin’s death. You can tell from the angle that the car was parked on the cliff right after the empty field behind where you stand, at an angle that is looking straight at the side wall of the factory, just a couple of meters before the left turn to the front of it. The video keeps running, grainy and slightly blurry due to the distance and the darkness of the night except for a faint hue of yellow light from this very street lamp. You know very well what the next footage will be.
As you imagined, the video plays on and a few seconds later, it shows you coming from the direction of the warehouse before marching away, out of the view.
“There were two cars parked on that cliff that night,” Seunghcheol points upwards, to the cliff behind you. “This is the dash cam footage of one of the cars. Care to explain, ___?” The fury in his eyes is unmistakable.
You breathe out a soft sigh. What does he want? He knows very well what this footage implies so why did he not just hand this over to the police? Standing here in front of him while he demands an explanation feels nothing short of torture to you.
“Go ahead,” He hisses, taking a step towards you. “Claim that it is not you. Tell me I am getting this wrong. Fucking say something!”
“You know very well, Cheol. What do you want me to say?” You finally find your voice which is as soft as a feather.
Furious, he marches towards you, grabbing you by the collars and it is truly a deja vu of that night. “Why did you do it?” He screams, shaking you, his pupils wide with bristling resentment. “Why did you kill her?” He hollers again.
His face is a mere inch or so away from you, so close that you can feel his warm breath puffing out in the cold night air, so close that you can feel the blizzard of emotions radiating off him.
He really cared for her. He might have loved her without even knowing.
Fuck, that thought burns like acid down your throat.
“She had everything I wanted.” You finally find yourself whispering. Seungcheol grows still upon hearing your words as you see the storm in his eyes die down. The entire world seems to quiten for a second as you only hear the two of you breathing. His brows remain furrowed as he regards you with confusion, his grip on your collar faltering. You breathe out, repeating. “Sumin had everything I ever wanted, Cheol.”
“And what was it?” He snaps.
You swallow a lump in your throat but never lose eye contact with him. “You.”
Like he has been electrocuted, Seungcheol lets go of you and takes an immediate step back. His pupils dilate as his mouth opens just slightly in bafflement. You find his reaction almost funny. Overdramatic as well. 
Is it really that shocking?
“Stop playing fucking games, ___.’’ He scoffs after the shock has worn off.
“It is true.” You take a step towards him with a new surge of energy in your blood. “I have wanted you since forever…since I was 18. Since the day of your father’s party after you returned from abroad I have longed for you.”
With each word you speak, his jaw hardens and a look of disbelief and something akin to disgust graces his face. 
“I have loved you for so long, Seungcheol and then Sumin appeared one day and took you away.” Your pitch loudens as your desperation grows. 
He needs to understand you, he needs to see you. 
You are not some cold-blooded monster. You are just someone madly in love with him.
“So you killed her!” He seethes.
“She was not right for you!” You cry, eyes blown out, teeth gritting. “She did not love you, Seungcheol! She was using you!”
He closes the gap between the two of you as he roughly grabs the side of your neck, tilting your head upwards. “Shut. Up.” He seethes, his eyes so dark, his gaze so fierce you almost feel like you have been burned down to a pile of ashes. “You are not only a murderer but also a fucking liar.”
A mirthless laughter escapes your lips as you take a step back from his grip and shake your head. You had expected this. You understand he will not believe you this instant but now that he knows what you have done, it will not take too long for him to find out what Sumin and her family was up to. He will believe your words then.
It is a shame you will most likely be behind bars by then.
“Stop laughing!” He shouts, frustrated. Raking a hand through his hair, he stares at the ground before looking back at you, his eyes shining in a look of desperation and betrayal. “I trusted you. You were like my family, ___. How could you do this?”
You cannot bear how disgusted he appears with you. 
Why cannot he just shoot you like you shot Sumin?
“You are my family too, Cheol.” You blink back tears. “The feelings I have for you are beyond something anyone can ever comprehend and…it is fine. I prefer it that way. I would burn the world for you, Choi Seungcheol so please don’t look at me with so much hatred.”
“You—” Seungcheol shakes his head with a frustrated grunt. “Just tell me where the fucking gun is.”
There is a faint smile you cannot hold back. “I got rid of it long ago.” You pause. “But don’t worry, this dashcam footage will be enough along with my confession.”
He looks at you with disbelief. 
You give him a sad smile. 
“Don’t act noble, ___. I know what you are capable of.” He hisses. “I will not trust a word that comes out of your mouth.”
“I am not lying. I won’t run away, Cheol. I promise. Just don’t call the police to my office. I would rather be arrested at home.”
Seungcheol is perplexed with your attitude and after a long moment of silence, when you realize he has nothing more to say, you start walking backwards.
“Goodbye, Cheol. It was really nice knowing you.” With your vision blurry due to unshed tears, you flash him a smile before quickly turning around and heading for your car, not looking back. 
You drive all the way home in silence before finally parking your car in the parking lot of your apartment. As the engine dies down, leaving you without its gentle hum, you sit in silence and let the reality of your life wash over you. 
You have had a good life. You wonder what it will be like behind the bars. You will plead guilty no matter what your lawyer says and you have no intention of lying and claiming you feel remorse for your actions. A life sentence awaits you for sure, maybe with no parole.
Shaking your head at the absurdity of your future, you rest your hands over the steering wheel, putting your head on them and closing your eyes. Your engagement ring digs into your forehead and you look up to see the small diamond glinting softly. It suddenly feels foreign on your skin and the longer you look at it, the worse it appears. Prying it off your fingers you fist it in your palm, half tempted to break it.
“I hope we can have a good life.” You remember Seungcheol’s words when he slipped that ring on your finger.
And finally, the dam breaks. You clutch the little trinket to your chest as you curl your body into a small ball and weep with your head hanging low. Soon, you cannot stop stifling the noise as your sobs turn into violent cries and in a fit of rage, hopelessness and longing, you punch your dashboard hard enough for your knuckles to bleed.
At some point, the blood seeping from your knuckles dries but your tears don’t.
_
You do not go to your office the next day for obvious reasons.
Instead, you spend the day cleaning your apartment and setting everything in its place one last time while waiting for uniformed officers to knock on your door. 
Hours tick by and it never happens, puzzling you. 
When the remnants of colour start fading from the dusk sky, someone rings your doorbell. You open it to find Seungcheol’s driver. 
“Mr Choi has asked you to come to his house.”
Baffled even further, you quickly change your clothes and follow him out. The man drives you to Seungcheol’s mansion and you hesitantly step outside of the car when you reach your destination all too quickly. The lady who is Seungcheol’s head of staff comes to greet you as she escorts you to his study, holding the door open for you to step in and then closing it softly behind you.
In the dimly lit room, Seungcheol sits at his desk with a glass of whiskey in his hand, his chair turned around so that he faces the window behind him. Tentatively, you walk closer to him and he slightly turns his head to look at you. His eyes are barren, devoid of any emotion, almost inhumane. 
A breath catches in your throat but you do not break your eye contact.
“Why did you bring me here?” You whisper, for some reason too scared to speak out loud.
“To have a serious discussion about our futures.” His tone is flat as he swivels his chair to face you.
What is that supposed to mean? 
Swallowing, you wait for him to elaborate.
“Does anyone else know what you did?” He asks.
His question throws you off slightly. “Just you. Though…in a way, my driver knows. I asked him to leave early with the empty car and told him to lie and say I was in the car if anyone asked.”
“So basically he knows.”
“Yes, but he is probably the only employee I trust. He has been extremely loyal to my grandfather and me.”
“This is a murder we are talking about.”
“If he wanted to rat me out, he would have done it by now. Besides, he did not witness it.” You frown, pausing. “Wait, I don't understand where this is going. Why are you asking me this?”
Seungcheol sighs, standing up. Pressing his hands flat on his desk, he looks directly into your eyes and leans closer. “Because I am going to cover it up.”
“What?” You had to have heard that wrong. There is no way—
“I am going to bury what you did.” He grunts, appearing disgusted with himself as he speaks the words. “I already got rid of the CCTV footage.”
Your jaw drops, as you subconsciously step back, gripping the back of the couch behind you. “I- I don’t understand…”
“I am not doing this for you.” He spits, scowling at you. “I am doing this for my family.”
You are still at a loss for words, trying to process everything coming out of his lips.
Seungcheol exhales a sigh of defeat, “I have thought about this long and hard. I cannot do this to my family, especially to my father. He was so excited about my marriage to Sumin and now he is ten times more excited to see us getting married. If he found out his ex daughter-in-law was murdered by you, his future daughter-in-law, someone he has always been fond of,” he shakes his head. “It would kill him. Plus, the company would suffer. The board wants to see me married and if my second engagement is ruined as well, I will not be running the company any time soon. My father would be devastated.”
You inhale a lungful of air. “So… you are saying you will still marry me.”
“That is the only way left is it not? Marrying a murderer.” He grits his teeth, his eyes shooting invisible arrows of fire at you.
“No.” Suddenly, your brain clears up. “No, it is not.” Your voice is determined. “This is not what I want!”
“Excuse me?” Seungcheol scoffs.
“I do not want to trap you in this marriage. You are marrying me against your will. I do not accept this. We will come up with an excuse. You can say I cheated on you or something.”
Seungcheol watches you in silence for a long moment before rounding his desk and coming close to you. Making you jerk in surprise, he grabs your arms and holds them tightly, his eyes flashing dangerously in the dimly lit room. “Listen to me very carefully, ____. You have ruined me enough to last a lifetime. Do not ruin my family and my company now. From now on, you will do as I say and play the part of the happiest bride-to-be. Is that fucking clear?’’
You stare at him in defiance.
“Is that clear?” His tone drops as his gaze darkens, giving you goosebumps. “You have done enough for me. No need to act noble and say that you don’t want to trap me when this was your plan all along.”
No, no. That is not true at all. You wanted him to love you. You wanted to be there when he needed help and you wanted him to come to you voluntarily. You were protecting him. He was never supposed to find out all this.
“Seungcheol, you are mistundertsanding me—”
“Are we clear?” He yells, shaking you by the arms.
“Yes.” You whisper. 
“Good.” He releases you. “Get out of my sight.”
You blink back tears and swallow a lump in your throat, slowly stepping towards the door with unsteady feet. Just as your fingertips touch the knob, you come to a stop. “Seungcheol?”
You hear a sigh of annoyance. “What?”
You turn around and ask, “Is there anything that you have been hiding from me?”
He raises a brow. “What could you possibly mean by that?”
There is a slight shrug of your shoulders. “Nothing, I just… You know, something like the fact that you knew that me and my grandfather were in fact, related by blood and he adopted me not because I was the one who caught his eye among all the others at the orphanage but due to his guilt for killing my parents.”
With each word that leaves your lips, Seungcheol’s pupils dilate and, ironically, he looks more astounded now than when you confessed to killing Sumin. 
For an achingly long moment, heavy silence hangs in the air and you never let your eyes stray from his, patiently waiting for what he has to say.
“How did you find out?” His tone is low.
“Sumin told me.”
You really did not think it was possible for him to look even more bewildered but he does. He abruptly marches towards you and leans forward, asking. “Sumin?” 
“Yes,” you sigh, rolling your eyes at his shock. 
“I don’t understand—”
“You know,” You cut him off. “I don’t remember my parents so I have never missed them and to some extent, I now understand why my grandfather did what he did. What I don’t understand is why he lied to me, why you all lied to me. And why I had to hear the truth from someone like Sumin. It doesn’t make sense, does it? You all were in the joke and no one once thought how I would feel if I found out.”
“You were not supposed to find out.” His tone is flat and the look he is giving you is enraging; like you have no right to be mad.
“And you were not supposed to find out that I killed your ex-fiance!” You scream.
Seungcheol exhales loudly, rubbing a hand over his face as he looks down at the ground. “Why did Sumin tell you this, ___?” His tone is sharp as if you are being investigated at a police station.
“Does it matter?”
“Of course it does!” He hisses, frustrated. “Why would she go out of her way to tell you that?”
“I found out some of her secrets and I threatened her with them.” You don’t let your eyes stray from his.
“What secrets?” His eyes darken.
You rub a frustrated hand over your forehead while resting the other on your hip. Not this again.
“It's better that you don’t know, Seungcheol.”
“Answer me, ___.” He inhales a sharp breath and grits his teeth, his patience is running thin.
So is yours.
From the pocket of your trousers, you fish out a recorder and toss it over to his table. “Since you want to know so bad, here you go. It has all the answers, the last conversation I had with her and her final moments.”
You see apprehension in his eyes as he watches the little black device sitting on his desk. “After listening to that, you might go back on your word.” You warn. Because the sound of you unlocking the safety of your gun is in there. Because the sound of Sumin’s lifeless body hitting the ground is in there.
“And if you decide to hand me over to the police after this,” You give a nonchalant shrug. “I completely understand. Just don’t destroy the record. There is only one copy and it is the best evidence you will have of this case.”
Seungcheol stands rooted to his spot, looking at you impassively as you close the door behind you.
-
Three days go by and the police do not come and you realize, once again Seungcheol has decided to brush what you did under the rug. It is a fixed feeling, mostly bitter if you are being honest with yourself. What lies ahead of you now is a bleak future where you and Seungcheol will live under one roof with stifling disgust. His friends and family will visit and you will have to pretend to be the happiest couple in front of them.
As you are returning home from work on Tuesday with all these thoughts bridling in your head, you receive a text from an unknown number.
Someone has texted you a location along with a message.
I have your man. If you want him to live, bring me 10 million dollars in this location within the next hour. Come alone or I will slice his head off.
For one moment you think— no, try to convince yourself that you are seeing things wrong and this is only a prank. However, you start to break into a cold sweat when you dial Seungcheol’s number with shaky hands and it goes unanswered. Petrified, you call his secretary next and he picks up on the fifth ring.
“Madam-”
“Where is Seungcheol? I cannot reach him.” You try to keep your voice as stable as possible yet a tremor slips through. Your gut prepares you for the worst when you hear a commotion in the background as his secretary takes a second too long to reply.
“Madam, I am really sorry. We were leaving work when two vans surrounded us on the highway and threw smoke bombs at us. They hit me in the head and took away Mr Choi after knocking him out. But don’t worry madam, the police have been informed—”
You hang up. 
Fucking hell.
The first thing you do is dial your secretary, throwing her into a furor as you order her to arrange the money and have it ready in half an hour at your place. 
When you reach home, you quickly discard your work clothes and put on a hoodie and sweatpants along with some good running shoes as a disguise. Your next task is to hurry down to your basement where you have stored your grandfather's collection of antic guns. You had it moved here after his death and thank god for that. Picking a long-barreled revolver, you check the chamber before tucking it in your waistband. 
Upstairs, your secretary waits with a duffel bag in her hands, struggling to hold the weight. Her face is littered with unsaid questions as you snatch the bag from her hands and storm past her. The weight of the cash hi nders your mobility, making you slower.
“If you say a word about this to anyone else I will gut you. And if you keep your mouth shut and go home like nothing happened, I will triple your salary.” You hiss at Yuna who’s eyes widen hearing the reward. 
Firing your Hennessey to life, you press the accelerator hard as you pull your car out of the basement and zoom down the street. The clock on the dashboard says you have exactly twenty-five minutes till your one hour is over and you whisper a silent prayer to whoever is up there for a traffic-free road. 
As you near your destination, you realize the location that was sent to you is a small, old two-storeyed storehouse near the seaport, once used to store cargo. Located a little further from the main port, it is a dingy building with cracked walls and missing windows and a backdrop of thick, dense forest, appearing haunted in the darkness of the night. 
With a deep inhale, you step out of your car and lock it. A slight shiver runs down your spine as you calculate your odds of rescuing Seungcheol safely. You don’t know who is waiting for you in there and if they even have him with them. Of course, you have a suspect in your mind and if they are alone, it should be easy to tackle them. Still, you make a risky decision.
You call the police.
“Hello, I have a tip about the kidnapping of Choi Seungcheol of the Choi Corporation. I am sending you my location. How long will it take you to get here?
“It will take about 12 minutes for the officers to reach the scene. Are you alone ma'am? Please do not go inside if you—”
You hang up the call and march towards the building carrying the duffel bag. With the reassurance that the police will be here soon, you step inside. 
The ground floor is eerily quiet and almost shrouded in complete darkness.
Somewhere nearby, the wolves howl.
The utter lack of light and noise tells you that the first floor is empty so you follow the stairs up to the second floor, illuminated by tube lights hanging very low from the ceiling.
Your cautious steps lead you to a wide, poorly lit hallway on the second floor. However, as you step into the corridor, you see a faint glow of orange hue on your right. 
This is it.
Feet moving automatically, your whole body tenses up as you grip the duffel with one hand and keep the other free, hovering over the back of your waist. Unlike the first floor, the construction of the second was left incomplete so at the end of the hallway there are no individual rooms but instead a big one. 
And there is Seungcheol.
With his hands and legs tied to a chair, he sits with his head hanging low, his tired frame illuminated by the small fire lit in front of him.
Best of all, there is no one else in the room.
“Seungcheol!” You cry, running straight to him.
He is baffled, gaping at you as you rush over to him, scrambling to untie his hands and legs as fast as possible.
“___? I- I don’t understand…How did you—”
“Hush.” You whisper, untying the last knot to free his leg before standing up to take a look at his face. There is a wound on his head, half-dried blood soaking his hair as your stomach forms knots, worried.
“We need to get you to a hospital.” You whisper, throat dry as you reach behind him to undo his hands.
“What a sweet reunion it is, no?” A familiar voice echoes, halting your action.
You whip your head around and there he stands, the man you suspected. 
Sumin’s father, Lee Ryunwoo. You should have taken care of him long ago.
The blood in your veins runs cold as you immediately step in front of Seungcheol to cover him. The man emerges from the shadows, waving a gun in his hand as he orders, “Try to play smart with me and I’ll blow your head off.”
“Why did you kidnap him?” You ask, watching his movements warily as you cover Seungcheol with your frame. “Do you think you can get out of this so easily?”
From behind you, Seungcheol’s quiet voice echoes. “He knows, ___.”
You freeze, immediately understanding what he is referring to.
What? How?
“You are awfully mouthy for a bitch who shot my daughter,” Ryunwoo smirks, stepping closer to you. He presses the barrel of the gun to your throat before pulling it away, flashing you a cruel smirk. You swallow the lump in your throat as your brain frantically thinks of the next move. Maybe calling the police was not the best idea.
“Imagine my surprise when I find that recorder.” You watch cautiously as he walks past you and kneels in front of the duffel back, his gun aimed at you. Using one hand, he opens the zipper, shuffling the cash around as he checks it. “Yes, I had someone break into his office after he started acting dodgy. I knew something was going on.” He pauses to look at Seungcheol. “Everything was going so wonderfully. You were so confident about a lead and then you suddenly claim it was nothing? You should have been more careful, son.” He chuckles with a shake of his head. 
You assess the situation, carefully watching his body language. Despite the gun in his hand pointing at you, his eyes are cast downwards, focused on the money.
You realize this might be your only chance.
Ever so carefully, you pull your revolver from your waistband, pointing it just slightly over his arm and pull the trigger.
Your sudden action has both the men confused as the bullet flies a mere half an inch above Ryunwoo’s hand, making him drop his gun and fall on his ass. 
“___! Stop!’’ Seungcheol yells from behind you, struggling to free himself from the chair while you step towards Ryunwoo, pointing the gun at his head.
“Where is the recorder?” You ask. 
He has the balls to chuckle. “This little thing?” From the breast pocket of his jacket, he slowly pulls out the little black device. 
“Hand it over.” You order, stepping closer.
His cackle echoes through the barren room, overpowering Seungcheol’s yells of protest. 
“Come and take it.” It is a challenge. 
You grit your teeth, popping a vein in your neck. “I could just shoot you right now.”
“Like you shot Sumin?” The smirk does not wipe off his face.
“___, for fucks sake! Don’t!” Seungcheol yells.
You would have gladly taken the shot had the police not already been on their way. Against your will, you decide to play his game. Pointing your gun with one hand, you extend the other, holding your palm open. “Give it. Now.”
The tip of your fingers brush against the device when the police siren is heard. Ryunwoo immediately pulls the device back as he bellows, “You called the cops, you bitch!”
Using his momentary distraction to your advantage, you lunge at him, knocking him down hard on his head and snatching the recorder from his hand. 
The next moment someone grabs your arm to pull you off of him and you look up to see Seungcheol. “Cheol! You—”
“The police will be here any second. They will investigate you if you hurt him.” He warns, pulling you towards him. On the floor, Ryunwoo groans, cupping his head and spewing curses at you. Outside, the sirens grow louder as you hear the commotion and the footsteps of the officers entering the building.
“Come,” Seungcheol attempts to guide you away by your shoulders when suddenly, you are dragged down. Ryunwoo’s abrupt pull on your leg makes you fall face down on the ground as the gun slips through your fingers upon impact. Seungcheol tries and fails to grab onto you in time as you are pulled backward by a rough grip. His entire body comes to a complete halt with his eyes widening in fear when he looks behind you, slowly raising his arms in surrender.
At the entrance of the room, the officers crowd, yelling at Ryunwoo to drop his weapon. 
That is when you actually feel the cold barrel of his gun pressed to your temple.
Oh fuck.
Exhaling a shaky breath, you turn your head ever so slightly to look at him. 
“I am going to blow your brains out and then go to jail, you cunt. How dare you trick me?” he sneers, venom dripping from his tone. His eyes are akin to a madman’s as the warnings of the officers fall deaf to his ears.
He really is going to shoot. 
Your eyes wander over to Seungcheol one last time before they fall closed the moment a gun goes off.
There is a ringing in your ears and you realise the right side of your face feels wet. 
A couple of seconds pass by before you open your eyes to find Ryunwoo lying on the ground behind you with a bullet hole in his head. The police rush in as Seungcheol tugs you towards him, wrapping his arms around you as you stare at the dead body. 
You feel like you are stuck in a trance as everything around you moves in slow motion, your eyesight getting slightly blurry as your heart thumps loudly in your chest. You do not know whether it is relief or trauma but your legs suddenly feel like jelly.
Seungcheol has to call your name multiple times to make you look at him. “___? Are you okay? Did you get hurt?”
You shake your head, blinking a few times to focus your vision. You are still lost in your own head, thinking about how close you were to getting exposed and how you managed to save yourself by a hairsbreadth. “The recorder?’’ You question quietly.
“Don’t worry, I have it.” He wraps his arms around you tighter.
A faint smile of relief comes to your face and you dare to rest your face on Seungcheol’s chest. To your utter relief, he does not oppose you but gently cradles your head.
“Thank you.” You hear him say. Surprised, you look up at his face to be greeted by a shocking sight. There is a beautiful smile on his lips that makes his eyes shine.
“For what?” You croak, suddenly emotional.
“For saving me.”
-
10 days later
Seungcheol’s best friend Jihoon is getting engaged today. 
Clad in a pastel pink blouse and a matching skirt, you silently sit next to your fiance in the car, your eyes trained outside the window. Seungcheol, like most times, does not attempt to break the delicate silence.
It is frustrating, especially because this is how he has been for the past ten days. Silent. As if his ex-father-in-law did not hold a gun to your head and then got killed by the police. As if you did not murder his ex-fiance and the proof of it is in his hands. 
The morning after that fateful night, both of you were asked at the police station for your statements. It was a basic procedure before they started uncovering the skeletons in Ryunwoo’s closet; the murders he committed right after he became the CEO of Lee Media to hide his corruption and the money he embezzled. His bankruptcy also came to light along with the millions of dollars of debt he was in and the shady works he did to earn money for it. 
Soon after that, the news of Sumin cheating on Seungcheol also came out. Someone anonymously leaked pictures of her and the model she was dating and the public was ruthless with their comments even though Sumin was dead. 
After all the news broke, they were the talk of the town. A group of reporters even tried to swarm you at every chance, hoping to get some details from you. 
When you met Seungcheol later in the week, he did not bring up the issues at all and instead went about his day as normal, bewildering you. One might think that the news never reached him. He never addressed them and you were too anxious to bring them up, afraid to lose the minimum attention you were getting from him.
Still, your worries have not vanished into thin air. It has been a weird few days and the more time passes, you cannot help but think things will go awry any second and you will fall face down into a nightmare all over again.
The car comes to a halt in front of Jihoon’s house and a valet holds open your door, helping you step out. Seungcheol rounds the car to come next to you. “Come on,” he says, buttoning his suit and stepping forward. Your hands reach for him mindlessly as you stop him by grabbing his hand. 
He turns back, a brow raised in confusion.
“Seungcheol.” You state, looking him in the eye. 
“What?”
You have a lot to say; so much that the thoughts tangle into intricate knots in your head and provide your lips with nothing. He waits for you to speak and you finally whisper, “Do you still have the recorder?”
The look in his eyes changes as he steps closer to you, holding eye contact. “Why? Do you think I handed it over to the police?” He sounds amused.
“I—” You pause, unsure what to say. It is undeniable that a small part of you has been worrying about that.
A short laughter of amusement comes from his lips before he becomes serious. “I burned it, ___.”
Your eyes widen in astonishment. Parting your lips, you let out a breath of surprise. 
“I…I don’t know what to say,” You whisper. “I was scared. You have been so quiet the last few days and—”
“I am trying to put what happened behind me.’’ He states, something foreign flashing in his eyes.
You remain silent, watching his face intently, hoping he can see the gratefulness in your eyes. His gaze is soft, brimming with an emotion you can’t put a name to but constricts your throat and makes your heart soar with hope.  “Seungcheol, I—” You are cut off as he presses his lips to yours in a bruising kiss that makes your toes curl. You lose your balance, your body falling against his as you melt in his arms. 
A heated look of mischief and desire swims in his eyes when he pulls back to look at you.
“Call me Cheol,” he smirks, gripping your hand tightly by weaving his fingers with yours. With long steps he heads for the entrance, tugging you with him who is now sporting a love-struck grin.
When a villainess loves, she makes sure to get the guy no matter what it takes.
Want more of them? Click here for a bonus scene of 2k words that is only available on my Patreon! It is not only smutty but there is also a part from Seungcheol's pov!
Tumblr media
© startlightxsvt 2024 | All rights reserved. Do not copy, repost, translate, adapt, or repurpose any of my works.
A/N: okay, so that was that. how was it? do lmk your feedback. also, if you have any questions about the characters or anything you are curious about, send me an ask, I'll fill in the blanks for you. what did you think about the ending? i purposefully left it a bit open because i don't see them being all head over heels for e/o (i mean oc is a simp ofc but not cheol). in fact, i imagine a very different ending for them in the long run, lol. and who knows, maybe i will write a part 2 someday, no promises tho. and if you noticed (im sure you did) this one does not have almost any smut. the reason for that was one, i find it extremely hard to write and two, i might write a small smutty epilogue in my patreon depending on how well this fic is received. we'll see. anyways, i'll stop the rant now. stay healthy and happy!
739 notes · View notes
gojossocks · 9 months
Text
Anything For You
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Sukuna x Reader genre: fluff, hurt/comfort summary: After a thousand years, Sukuna never thought that he'd find you again. Only this time, your goals have changed and you weren't the person he can rule the world with anymore. Would he give that up just for you? wc: 2.7K content: friends to lovers, lovesick sukuna, kinda ooc sukuna because of how lovesick he is, mutual pining. they were in a situationship for a thousand years, can you guys handle that?
Tumblr media
“Sukuna, don’t you feel alone in the past thousand years? I mean, all you’ve wanted is to gain power and do other villain-y things. It’s pretty lame and sad in my opinion.” Yuuji, his vessel, says mindlessly as he chews on his food while he waits for Megumi and Nobara. 
“You insolent fool.” He sneered, a mouth forming on Yuuji’s cheeks. “I don’t mope around like you do. I was not alone either.” 
Contrary to popular belief, Sukuna wasn’t heartless as most people paint him out to be. In fact, during the Heian Era, Sukuna is always seen to be with a powerful sorcerer. 
There was you. The only person he sees as his equal. 
But after you were killed, your history with Sukuna was quickly forgetten as the men write history in their own perspective. You are a significant figure in history, yes– but you and Sukuna together were only briefly mentioned in the books. 
People have forgotten about how Sukuna, the King of Curses, have ruled the Jujutsu World with you by his side. 
In the bygone days of the Heian Period, You and Sukuna have a unique bond as you two had grown up together. You were the only one who witnessed how he rises up to be the King of Curses. You were a powerful sorcerer too in your own way, despite the lack of title. Your benevolent nature has gotten a lot of people to respect you. People were not intimidated by your power but by your wisdom. 
Despite your personality which is in contrast to Sukuna’s, it never became a hindrance between your bond. In fact, he seemed to like you more because of it. You taught him how to kill and destroy with purpose. and together, the two of you wreaked havoc on Earth. 
You were the first and last person who knows him inside and out, not even Uraume could compare. He even prefers your shitty cooking, for god’s sake. He feels weak in your presence. Sukuna kind of resents you for it, how you make him feel. How he’s willing to burn the entire world at your command. He’d kill anyone without batting an eye if you ask him to. You have him wrapped around your pretty fingers and you don’t even know it. 
He remembers going into the gardens of your shared home after a battle and you’d welcome him with open arms, hugging him with your little frame. You didn’t care about the blood on his clothes or how he reeks of death. You look at him with such kindness, as if he has done nothing wrong in this world. You held his hands with such gentleness, as if he has hasn’t covered his hands with so much blood. And you smile and crack jokes around him after terrorizing villages, you wrap bandages around his wounds even if he can heal it in a heartbeat. He loves being doted on by you. 
He was really good at keeping his emotions to himself unlike you who’d outwardly show how much you love him. He had a feeling that you knew of his affections slightly. After all, you were the only one allowed to touch Sukuna, to tease him and be alive after that. He chose not to tell you his feelings because he thought that he’d have all the time in the world to tell you. 
Well, he thought he did until he received the news that you were killed. 
Sukuna didn’t look at your corpse, refusing that seeing your cold lifeless body would be his last memory of you. After that was just endless rampage of destruction. In his mind, it was his way of avenging you. People have forgotten about you because of the amount of lives he had taken— his crimes outweighed any humanity he had left of him. 
It goes like that until he was defeated and sealed. Well, that was years ago but even now, all he thinks about is you. So much that he could still hear your laugh. 
“Really?” Yuuji exclaimed. “I think I should ask Gojo-sensei about—”
Yuuji’s rambling was cut off with a sound of laughter, which causes both him and the demon inside him to look where that voice comes from. 
That all too familiar voice that even after countless lifetimes, he would still recognize anywhere. Sukuna felt like his entire world stopped when he sees where that voice comes from. Everything seemed to blur as his entire attention is fixated on the woman. 
It was you, in the flesh. 
Or rather, someone who is an exact copy of you. 
He had found you! You had reincarnated as he hoped you would. You kept your promise and you’d see him again. 
You were walking and conversing beside Gojo Satoru as you approach Yuuji who stood up straight and looked at you with wide eyes. 
“Who might this be?” You gave the kid a playful smile. 
Sukuna was able to examine you up close as you walked closer to Yuuji. You were as beautiful as the day he lost you. You fit right into this modern period— you’re wearing a uniform similar to Gojo’s, but instead of pants, you were wearing a skirt and knee high boots. If someone were to tell Sukuna that he’d find you like this, fighting against him, he would have howled in laughter before killing that someone. 
“Yuuji Itadori, miss!” the young sorcerer said, exuding a bit too much enthusiasm. 
“So he is the vessel.” You acknowledged with a nod before sharing a look with Gojo Satoru. 
“This is Y/N Y/L/N! She’s a special grade sorcerer from Kyoto but will be transferring here to accommodate you. She doesn’t go to missions anymore just like I do so Y/N would be there whenever you need her.” Gojo explains, putting a hand on you and Yuuji’s shoulders. 
Yuuji’s eyes widened as he registered the significance of your name “Like the one in history books Y/N Y/L/N?” 
“I wish.” You quipped, inserting a playful note in your response. “It was nice meeting you. I’ve waited for you, you know.” Then you extended your hand toward Yuuji and as your fingers met his, Sukuna could feel the familiarity of your touch. You looked at Yuuji with so much intensity, as if you’re looking at the curse residing in him. Right at Sukuna. and he didn’t fail to notice the way your smile was gentler compared to the ones you’ve given the kid. 
It was for him.
You’ve seen him. 
“Well,” You let out a sigh when you’ve pulled away. “I better get going. I’m sorry to cut this short, Yuuji. I hope we’ll get to know more of each other. I heard you like rice bowls, I’ll treat you to my favorite restaurant in tokyo next week, yeah?” You pat the top of his head and Yuuji gives you a huge grin. 
Once you’ve left, Yuuji could finally notice Sukuna’s silence. He had been silent ever since you’ve arrived and Yuuji was about to tease him for it until Gojo spoke up. 
“It’s her if she wasn’t being obvious enough.” 
-.- 
In the week following his unexpected encounter with you, Sukuna’s demeanor underwent a subtle transformation. He was less mean to Yuuji and the snarky remarks had lessened. 
True to your promise, you spent time with Yuuji, fulfilling your role as a companion and mentor. However, your newfound indifference towards Sukuna fueled a frustration that within him. Did he merely imagine the spark of recognition in your eyes? Was it truly still you? 
He found out a lot about you during the time you spent with Yuuji as well as the information that Gojo discloses concerning you. It seems as though you have helped the Jujutsu World slowly gain back its glory just like back in the golden days. You’re a teacher too, and from what Gojo has mentioned, you’re still the same patient and kind person he fell in love with. 
Sukuna feels a twinge of jealousy at the mention of how you’re close with the white-haired sorcerer. He finds himself scoffing at the thought of you finally replacing him. It isn’t far from reality, you’re too likable for your own good anyway. You make it so easy to love you that Sukuna failed to notice that this disease has swallowed him whole and now he’s stuck, absolutely pining for you like an idiot. How dare you move on from him if that’s the case? 
He needed answers from you or else he’d go crazy. So he finds out where you live and he found out that you were living in the more peaceful side of Tokyo. It took him a while to get in control again and the moment he did, his feet carried him to you. 
Your house is beautiful, it looked like the mini version of the place that you once shared with Sukuna. He entered it quietly and to his surprise, you were no where to be found but then he catches a glimpse of you in the window overlooking the garden. 
Sukuna finds himself smiling as he reaches the garden. It had a variety of flowers and plants, the very ones you had planted with him years ago. You’re wearing a beautiful red plaid sundress and the modern age never looked so good in anyone but you. 
You were simply ethereal. 
You were too engrossed in watering your plants when he walks towards you. 
“Old habits hard for you, Y/N.” Sukuna spoke up, his voice devoid of any usual domineering tone that he uses to other humans. 
You turned to him, wide eyed. It was the first time you’ve seen him in ages. Sukuna’s still in the body of the young sorcerer that you frequently saw the past week but he looked like him—with his tattoos and demeanor. Your eyes are soon filled with tears and you shakily reached for him, engulfing him in a tight embrace. 
“Finally.” You choked out, burying your face to his chest. Sukuna carefully snakes his hands towards your back on instinct.  “It’s been so long. it was all worth it. I knew you’d come back.” 
He rests his chin on the top of your head. Sukuna’s voice turned hoarse as he spoke. “I thought you were killed I-” 
“I’m already here, Ryo.” You interrupted, pulling away to cup his cheek gently. Sukuna leaned in to the warmth of your touch, melting in an instant. “ I wasn’t. I was just sealed until I was let out by one of my dearest friends. I came to find you but you were already gone, so I waited.” 
“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you, Y/N.”  
“You were asleep for almost a thousand years. I was alive for most of it, clearly I missed you more.” 
“Well, I thought you were dead. Cut me some slack, doll.” Sukuna teased with a smirk. You bite your lip to stifle your smile, playfully nodding inagreement.
“Come with me.” He murmured, pulling away to press his lips against your forehead. “After I kill this brat, I can take control and we can finally change the world.” 
“By killing everyone in it?” You shakily asked. Sukuna thought that you were just shaken because of how glad you are to have him back. 
He gave you a smirk. “Well, that was my idea. You know how I am.” 
“Times have changed, Ryo.  I’m afraid that it has softened me. I’m not the person you used to imagine burning the world down with anymore.” You calmly admitted, meeting Sukuna’s intense gaze and you tried to calm him down by tracing circles on his arm but he didn’t look convinced in the slightest. 
“I’m here now. You could drop your act. I can protect you now, you know.” 
“You don’t understand, dear.” you interjected, gently pushing a strand away from his face.  “We have different objectives now. You seek to take over the world and be feared forever. I seek to live out my days in peace until I decide to end it.” 
You must’ve noticed how Sukuna’s expression dropped at your words so you quickly clarified. “oh no, but don’t think I’d end my life after our interaction. In fact, I’ll live for a few more years until it will bore me to death. Literally. But there’s just so much to love and to do in this world, I’m afraid.” 
“Don’t you want to be with me? Have you grown tired of me?”  He demanded, his voice getting louder as he continues to talk.  You weren’t fazed in the slightest and it aggravates him even further. It used to comfort him, that you know him so well, but now the butterflies in his stomach makes him anxious more than anything else. 
You have always had the upper hand and he feels you cursing him the more you grant him your presence. 
He feels disregarded as you implicitly rejected him. 
“No.” You offered him a sweet smile, your eyes never leaving his. Sukuna thinks he might float with the way you’re looking at him right and his breath hitched once he hears you say the next words. “I love you, Ryo. In fact, I love you enough to know of your nature and I would be the last person who would stop you in achieving what you want. I wouldn’t be in your way but I couldn’t stay by your side anymore.”
Sukuna searched for a hint that indicates that you were lying and he found none. You had always been honest with him. He looks at you with a heartbroken expression but still trying to maintain his stoic face. He’s clearly hurt “Did our past mean nothing to you?” 
“I’ve done everything I could, Ryo. I’ve done everything for you. You know I did that all for you. Wasn’t that enough? Didn’t you feel my love for you in the slightest? You could kill me now, if you want. It’d be a pleasure to die by your hand.” Your eyes are once again brimmed with tears again yet you continued to smile as you trail your fingers over his cheek “I’m sorry but I’m tired of seeing red. Gojo must’ve told what I did, you must know my change of heart.” 
He did. 
Of course he did. 
He knew of what you did yet he still held on to the fact that he might be wrong. So is this really how it ends?  Sukuna enjoys destruction and killing. He loves being in power and he will not admit that if you weren’t alive, he’s probably murdering civillians in Shibuya right now. But after he’d gain control over Yuuji Itadori’s body, the only thing that he keeps thinking of is coming home to you. 
And what would the point be if you are not by his side? 
“Then I’ll stay with you.” He declared. 
A scoff escapes your lips and your bewildered expression makes him smirk even more. “You can’t be serious.” 
“I’ll just finish this and I’ll come back to you. None of this matters anymore. I’ll abandon all of it. For you.” 
You looked at him incredulously, your mouth agape. Sukuna wastes no time to finally pull you in a kiss.  
It was a gentle one at first and he pulls away slightly to see you pout, eliciting a chuckle from him, only to pull you back to a deeper, passionate kiss. Sukuna smiles into the kiss as a soft gasp escapes from you. 
He kisses you fervently, as if he needs your air to breathe. And as you run your hand through his hair, moaning to the kiss, he pulls you impossibly closer. 
He’s home. 
He returned to you 3 months later, in his original form. He entered your house with wounds and bruises, his body covered in blood once more. It was just like before, but this time, it feels so different. He had a soft look in his eyes and he feels like he’s floating on air now that he’s gone home to you. 
Just like before, you welcomed him with open arms. He lifted you and spinned you around, eliciting a squeal from you. When he puts you down, you peppered kisses to his face and hugged him really tight. 
“I love you.” Sukuna whispers, tucking your hair behind your ear before leaning in to kiss you gently. You smiled at his confession. There was a look in your eyes that you knew it all along. 
“It took you a millennium to say that.”
Tumblr media
wanna read more?
a/n: i bet he still murders in his free time after being retired 😻
2K notes · View notes
navybrat817 · 2 months
Text
His Favorite Person
Tumblr media
Pairing: Librarian!Ari Levinson x Female Reader
Summary: You want to be more than friends with Ari.
Word Count: Over 1.5k
Warnings: Fluff, sweetness, friends to lovers (of sorts), Ari Levinson (he's a warning, okay?).
A/N: More Beach Fun Nonsense! Hope you lovelies enjoy. @lovebittenbyevans requested Librarian AU, friends to lovers with Ari, and to dig his Toes in the Sand (fluff) with prompt #7 in bold. Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
Tumblr media
You stood on your tiptoes to reach a book on the top shelf. You huffed out a breath and tried to stretch a little bit more, but your fingers barely skimmed the spine. It would’ve been easier to ask for some help, but you didn’t want to bother Ari. You bothered him enough during his shifts.
You should’ve known he was only standing a few feet away, watching the display with a smirk on his ridiculously handsome face. “Need some help?” He asked.
Managing not to fall into the shelf from the slight scare, you pointed to the book you tried and failed to grab. “If you wouldn’t mind?” You asked, dragging your eyes from his chest to his eyes. It was like looking into a storm, but warmth lingered in a way that told you not to fear any destruction left in its wake. “Please?”
Rugged was the word that came to mind whenever you glanced at him. A dark beard to match his long hair and jeans that showed off his large thighs, he even had the sleeves of his tight shirt rolled up so you could see his veins. The man could've easily passed for an adventurer instead of a librarian and you were certain he caught you staring at him more than once.
It wasn’t polite to stare, but was it fair for him to be so good looking?
“Don’t mind at all,” he said, plucking it from the shelf and placing it in your waiting hand. “You could’ve just asked me to grab it from the start, but you just had to be stubborn.”
“I wasn’t being stubborn,” you argued. He raised an eyebrow in response. “You just have a lot to do and I didn’t want to bother you,” you said, hugging the book to your chest.
“You were being stubborn, you’ve never once bothered me, and it’s part of my job to help.” Ari made a show of looking around, his silky hair flowing with the motion. “But I guess you’re right. I have so much to do since it’s so crowded today,” he joked.
It wasn’t a secret that the library was hit and miss in town. So many wanted their stories electronically and didn’t appreciate the feel of a book in their hands. Ari did what he could though since he took over as head librarian. Between overseeing the daily operations and managing his employees, he took his job seriously. You had no doubt he’d bring a much needed spark back to the place.
“Yeah, well, thanks for your help,” you said.
“Another romance novel, huh? Didn’t you just bring one back today?”
Your face grew warm before you nodded. Of course, he’d notice that. “You know me,” you mumbled, hugging the book tighter.
He took a step closer, searching your face with a gentle gaze. “Hey, there’s nothing wrong with reading what you love.”
There was no judgement in his eyes and that made the corner of your lips lift in a smile. “I appreciate that.”
Being single, reading books like that allowed you to dive into various worlds and experience love. You could immerse yourself and imagine having a partner who would not only overcome obstacles with you, but would ensure that there would be a happily ever after. In a world often dark and negative, the escape gave you hope that one day you'd manage to find someone who could love you so deeply. You didn't want to think that romance only existed in books.
If only you were brave enough to take a chance and ask Ari out.
“Oh, I almost forgot to tell you,” you began, walking beside him to head to the front desk. He took up a good portion of the aisle with his beefy frame and you had to tell yourself again not to stare. “I spoke with my boss about adjusting my hours and they approved it! I can do Story Time on Tuesdays.”
“That’s great!” The smile on Ari’s face was worth moving your schedule around. “I really appreciate you doing that for me. I owe you one.”
You wished you would’ve teasingly suggested a date as a form of payment, but you shrugged. “You don’t owe me anything. You’re my friend and that’s what friends do,” you said, cringing inwardly. It sounded lame to your ears.
“Yeah. Friends.” His smile faded slightly as he walked around the counter. “Just this book today, right?” He asked, slipping into his professional tone. Still pleasant to hear, but a touch of the usual warmth was gone. Like you were just like every other person who walked into the library.
“Yeah,” you replied, passing over your library card. “Did I say something wrong?” You added, your voice barely above a whisper.
“No, you didn’t,” he said, his large hand placing your card on top of the book. He passed it over to you and you couldn’t ignore the jolt of electricity that moved through you when your fingers touched. “Why would you think that?”
“It’s just…” Putting him on the spot wasn’t your intention and you didn’t want to point out his slight change in demeanor. “You do consider us friends, right?”
You didn't have a lot of close friends, but you considered Ari to be one of them. At the very least, he was friendly with you. It was possible that you read things wrong. Engrossing yourself in one too many books could’ve blurred your version of reality.
“Of course, I do. You’re my favorite person,” he replied. You leaned on the counter with a relieved and dopey smile at his statement. Were you really his favorite person? “But just because you’re my favorite person doesn’t mean I have to be yours.”
“But you are my favorite person,” you blurted out, covering your mouth when your voice echoed. “Sorry,” you added in a hushed whisper. It was a library. You needed to be somewhat quiet.
He chuckled and leaned on the counter, too, his eyes zeroed on you. “Oh, I am, am I? So, you don't actually come here to borrow romance novels. You’re just really looking for an excuse to see me.”
Your heart pounded, but you took a breath to keep your cool and hopefully not make a fool out of yourself. “I come here for the books and to see you, Ari,” you said carefully, the corner of your lip twitching in a smile. “But you obviously want to see me, too, otherwise you wouldn’t have asked me to do Story Time.”
“Well, yeah,” he smirked before softly adding, “Seeing you is the best part of my day.”
How did your knees not buckle? “It is?”
“Yeah, it is.” He smiled, almost to himself. “Can I ask you something?”
“You just did, but you can ask me another question,” you teased.
He stretched across the counter a bit more. “If I'm your favorite person and you're mine, why haven't we gone on a date?”
For a moment, it felt like the room sucked up all the oxygen. Breathing should've been natural to do, but you couldn't inhale as you stared at him. Glancing down at the book to get your bearings, it dared you to take a chance. A leap of faith. With a deep breath, you did.
“Because I've been waiting for you to ask me out and you haven't yet. And I've been too chicken to ask you myself,” you replied. You regretted the words the moment he stood up straight, his expression unreadable. He didn’t actually want that, did he? “I’m sorry. Forget I said that. Please.”
A second passed and his lips slightly parted, but he didn't speak. His silence said it all. Nodding with a heavy heart, you turned to walk away from the counter. You could lick your wounds later as you read another happily ever after.
“Shit. Wait.” Ari moved with impressive speed to block your path, his grip gentle on your arms to stop you. “Did you mean it? You really want to go on a date with me?”
You nodded. “Yeah, I do, but I understand if-”
“Thank fuck,” he sighed, your eyes rounding at his words. “I’ve been wanting to ask you out for days and I got worried there for a moment with the ‘friends’ comment that you didn't want anything beyond friendship.”
Your stomach did somersaults. Ari liked you. He wanted to ask you out. God, you almost ruined things before they started. “I’m sorry I worried you, but trust me. I'm very interested in you, Ari,” you smiled, forgetting you were in the library as you stepped closer. “And if you ask me, some of the best romances come from friendships.”
“They do.” He smiled back, his cerelain eyes lit up like yours. “And our story will be more romantic than any of those books you’ve been reading.”
Biting your lip, you watched as his gaze dropped to your mouth. What would it feel like if he bit your lip? “I don’t know. That’s a pretty tall order.”
He brought his mouth to your ear. “I’m a very determined man,” he whispered. No doubt he felt you tremble in his grasp. “Saturday night?”
“It’s a date.”
A date and the beginning of your love story.
Tumblr media
We know this man would plan the perfect date, right? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi
440 notes · View notes
headspace-hotel · 2 years
Text
I don't think it really hits for most people how much topsoil is an incredibly depleted resource that is virtually nonrenewable under current land management practices.
Topsoil you buy at a garden center most likely is not real topsoil, but rather simply compost mixed with sand. Many people have never touched topsoil. In vast swathes of inhabited land, topsoil simply does not exist anymore.
On the lawn care subreddit, people will occasionally be alarmed that their soil feels "mushy" and "soft" after the addition of lots of organic matter, or post something greatly alarmed about the area of "soft" soil in their yard.
These people would shit their pants in awe if they felt the soil in a forest. Their frame of reference for "soil" is so completely, sadly spoiled by compacted, concrete-like lawn dirt. This is a big reason I'm "anti-lawn." Lawns consistently have some of the worst, most devastated soil imaginable.
Topsoil is a LIVING community of microbes, plant roots, decaying organic matter, and perhaps most importantly of all, fungal mycelium. You cannot buy it. You cannot synthesize it. No amount of fertilizer will turn compacted lawn dirt into topsoil. It takes a hundred years to build one inch of topsoil.
In the USA, prairie soil was plowed up to make fields, and we all learned about the Dust Bowl in school, but we don't talk enough about the fact that plowing up the prairies engulfed half the country in devastating dirt storms that turned the sky black and had people choking and coughing up dirt all the time and sweeping deep drifts of dirt out of their houses. Like that happened. Damn.
What we did was something utterly devastating, the near total destruction of hundreds and hundreds of years' worth of an irreplaceable natural resource. And it's happened all over the country. We will never comprehend how much we lost when we lost the topsoil.
11K notes · View notes
beanytuesday · 10 months
Note
Hey, I love your art -- I was wondering if you ever posted your illustration for Kafka's "A Hunger Artist" on here? It's really evocative and gorgeously framed, and I find myself thinking of it frequently!!
Tumblr media
Thank you for the kind words. A Hunger Artist by Franz Kafka is one of my favorite short stories of all time, and it’s a very quick read. You can read it right here:
https://www.kafka-online.info/a-hunger-artist.html
Go ahead, I’ll wait here.
I’d like to take us opportunity to talk a little bit about the story, if I may.
Although there are a couple different interpretations of the story's meaning, it unambiguously read to me as an allegory for the plight of the creative, likely drawing from Kafka’s own experience. The ‘starving artist’ comparison is obvious, but there’s much more to it than that. In a departure from most other depictions in media, the plight of the artist is not depicted as something noble or redemptive, but as a sort of self-destructive madness. The hunger artist dies alone and in obscurity, his impact on the world ultimately being completely marginal and insubstantial. When questioned about why he chose a life like this, he reveals that he doesn’t even enjoy fasting, he simply couldn’t find any food he liked. That is to say, a true creative does not select this kind of self destructive lifestyle because they enjoy it; rather, it is because they cannot possibly bear to do anything else. Kafka himself, It should be mentioned, supposedly despised pretty much every job he ever had.
As some of you may know, I developed severe tendinitis a couple months ago. Mentally, September was probably the worst months of my entire life. I reflected on this story a lot –I had wrought my own self destruction, and for what? A couple of bucks? A few comics that i’ll become embarrassed of in a year’s time anyway? Unsure about my prospects for recovery, I became incredibly depressed.
But having been starved of the ability to write or draw, I had a genuine epiphany. Standing at the corner of Boston liquors in Allston, I resolved that I would muster the strength to endure this, regardless of how long it took, because what awaited me at the end was nothing short of the greatest prize a person could ask for: That very thing derided by Kafka –the life of an artist.
There is no greater pleasure than making art. I mean that genuinely, I mean that literally. No, it isn’t noble, no, it isn’t redemptive, but in a totally hedonistic and self-serving way it is simply the greatest thing that life can offer, ambrosia in the mouth, better than sex, better than drugs, better than anything that money can buy, and I feel pity for anyone unable to experience it. I am not being hyperbolic, I am not being metaphorical. I am stating this in the plainest of terms, having lived a life without it for the last couple of months.
So although my personal relationship to the story has changed in the past couple months, Kafka was right about one thing; nothing else tastes good, at least not by comparison. We must imagine the hunger artist happy.
1K notes · View notes
cerastes · 10 months
Text
I still think it's really cool how Amuro starts as the shittiest pilot alive (because he's a 15-year old) that only gets carried because he's in the biggest, fattest stat stick in-universe at the time (a few retroactive additions made in the future notwithstanding), enough that even its crappy vulcan guns are tearing Zaku IIs apart, and when he starts getting a bit too cocky, Char and Ramba Ral show up in objectively inferior pieces of junk and absolutely deliver his pizza, they just drag his face across every available surface in Planet Earth like he's a Yakuza mook, all because they are simply that much better at piloting, and the thing is, Amuro takes that very seriously.
He goes from shitass kid in an unfortunate situation that doesn't want to get in the robot to the most unwell child soldier in the war, which is really saying something, but most importantly, becomes so good at piloting the Gundam that the Gundam physically cannot handle Amuro's piloting. They need to apply "Magnetic Coating" to its joints so they don't fucking snap away from the main frame because Amuro, one, moves too damn well but also in too extreme a way for the frame to handle it, two, despite being equipped with two sabers, a shield, a beam rifle and vulcan guns, Amuro is a stern believer in introducing most everyone in thagomizer range to his Rated Z for Zeon hands, the single most official pair of hands in the business, tax free. He KEEP going Ip Man on these dudes, he does NOT need to do a Jamestown on these mother fuckers but he INSISTS. Somehow even the Gundam Hammer, which is a giant Hannah Barbera cartoon flail-- Ok, look at this thing, words do not do it justice
Tumblr media
Even this god damn Tom and Jerry prop is less savage that whatever Amuro decides to do the moment he's done throwing his shield to get a free kill on someone and it officially becomes bed time forever for the unfortunate sap at the business end of his ten-finger weapons of mass destruction.
The RX-78-2, "Gundam" for its friends and family, even has a top of the line cutting edge Learning Computer that 'learns' alongside the pilot and their habits. This data extracted from it was so absolutely fucked up that it completely revolutionized Mobile Suit combat afterwards, which is a wholesome thing to think about when The Best Combat Data Ever came from a really angry, really stressed 15 year old that doesn't even like piloting. He was 15! He made Haro with his own hands! Amuro literally just wanted to make funny cute spherical robofriends! Amuro was out there trying to make Kirby real, but fate had other plans for him. His cloned brain put in a pilot seat is one of the setting's strongest 'pilots'.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
They made fucking Shadow the Hedgehog with his brain, god damn.
By the end, Zeon is rolling out Gelgoogs out of its mass production lines. These things are in the Gundam's ballpark in terms of overall specs (or "power level"). Amuro is bodying them as if they were episode 1 Zaku IIs.
AND THEN HE GETS FUCKING PSYCHIC SPACE POWERS. Not that he needed them, he bodied a couple Space Psychics without any of those powers before awakening to them. But heaven's most violent child was not done evolving, whether he liked it or not.
Char bodied him in a souped up Zaku II at the start, a machine objectively inferior to the Gundam. Amuro more or less one-sidedly beats the shit out of Char when he's in a custom Commander-type Gelgoog that you could consider to be equal spec-wise to the Gundam. Amuro is the embodiment of Finding Out. He is Consequences. You tell him he better make it hurt, better make it count, better kill you in one shot, buddy, he needs half a fucking shot. The complete transformation. One could consider the central 75% of the show as long drawn out training montage turning a kid into the Geese Howard of giant robots.
1K notes · View notes