#so there's more shenanigans and mayhem abouts

[mayhemart]

A Returner's Magic Should Be Special 

(귀환자의 마법은 특별해야 합니다)

[one-idea]

I love a Roger/Rouge lives to raise Ace or a Shanks takes Luffy with him one-shot as much as anyone.

But the main problem I always have is that the ASL brothers would never meet in these circumstances. So my brain (being the mess that it is) has tired to find a solution.

What if Rodger never got sick or at least it was not as deadly as it was. Still chronic but not a death sentence. He lives and Rouge has Ace (she gets pregnant a little later then in cannon so that she doesn’t have the crazy long pregnancy but Ace is still the same age).

To keep his family safe they travel with him on the Oro Jackson. They stay to relatively calm waters that the marines can’t easily get to. Some of the crew also leave to make their own crews. This gives the marines something else to chase.

Shanks is one of the ones to set out on his own. He leaves when he’s around 17 right around the time Ace is born. It’s the push he needs to set out. He wants to distract the marines as much as possible from Roger’s family. (Buggy did the same thing. They decided to split up to cause more mayhem)

Ten years go by. Shanks visits Roger when he can but for the most part he’s making a name for himself. And he’s doing a good job at it. So good he has to lay low for a while. So he decides to go to the East Blue for a bit. Get away from the Grandline while also hiding somewhere different than Roger. (That way if the marines find him they won’t also find Roger)

It’s here that he meets a 7 year old Luffy. And it plays out much the same as cannon. He adores this little ball of sunshine. This is his boy. He doesn’t care who the boy’s blood father is this, is his boy. So he gives him his hat, has Luffy promise to return it when he’s a great pirate someday. But he leaves out the part about that being the next time they see each other because he wants to see his boy again.

When Shanks returns to the Grandline he seeks out Roger to tell him about their new family member. And Roger hears about this boy who is sunshine incarnate, who dreams to be the freest person alive, who wants to dethrone him as pirate king and goes, “I can’t not meet him.” And there’s no way he’s waiting till the kids on the sea. (Plus Ace needs some friends. Shanks and Buggy had each other, Ace has no one his own age and Rouge is starting to worry for their son.)

So they set out for the sleep island in the East Blue.

Meanwhile Grap has moved Luffy to Dadan’s care. While Luffy is out wondering around he bumps into a blond haired boy named Sabo. It takes a while but Sabo starts to warm up to the 7 year old that’s following him like a shadow.

Just in time for a new kid to wander his way into their jungle. Oro Jackson has Docked and Roger has been (discreetly) looking around for this Luffy while the crew restocks. Ace has already made his way into the jungle because even though he was raised by his parents, he’s still feral. (He was raised on a pirate ship go figure) the three boys bump into each other and through some shenanigans Ace and Sabo start to get along.

It doesn’t take long for Sabo and Luffy to figure out who Ace’s dad is. You know since they actually get to meet them.

The Bluejam pirates still happen.

Maybe Ace doesn’t like Luffy at first. He’s a little kid and is annoying in the way all older kids find younger kids that just want to follow them around annoying. But it’s more than that, because Shanks has claimed Luffy. Shanks, who Ace grew up around and looks up to, came back to the ship and didn’t want to talk about anything except for this ‘amazing’ kid. This kid who his uncle/older brother gave up his arm to save. This kid who is so ‘special’ his dad just had to come and meet him. This kid who has his dad wrapped around his finger in under a day. This kid, who is wearing his Dad’s old hat like a crown and talking about dethroning his dad like it’s his right. This little crybaby who’s not even that special. He can’t even swim!

Even Sabo has a soft spot for the kid, Sabo who is now Ace’s first friend, but he obviously likes Ace better because Luffy is such a crybaby.

But then the Bluejam pirates show up and they heard that the king of the pirates is here with his son. His son he would do anything for. Wouldn’t it be nice to get the bounty for the king of the pirates? If they have his son they can probably force the man into handing himself over. They wouldn’t even have to fight him!

They set out to capture Ace. They see him hanging around Sabo and Luffy. When they attack Ace and Sabo get away but Luffy gets caught. He gets tortured as they ask him to give up the location of the Roger Pirates so that they can capture Ace and by extension Roger. But Luffy won’t tell them anything.

Roger comes to save him. The whole crew comes along with Ace and Sabo. After this the three boys are inseparable. Ace steals some of the crew’s sake and the three swear to become brothers.

While the three boys are doing this. Roger sent some men to find the rest of the Bluejam’s crew and find out about their plan to burn Grey Terminal and how they were hired by Sabo’s father. And that settles it for him. If there was any doubt in Roger’s mind that he was taking Sabo with them when they left this island it was gone now. He thought the boy was oddly dressed for a homeless boy, finding out he was a noble explained a lot. He’s not leaving the boy in this situation. Mainly because Ace finally has a friend/brother. Finding out that adopting the boy would make a noble lose their mind was a bonus!

But what about Luffy? He knows Shanks thinks of the boy as a son. He’s know he is Ace and Sabo’s brother, and they haven’t left his side since the kidnapping. Rodger has no clue who the boy’s family is. At this point Luffy has only introduced himself as Luffy. He lives with the bandits but they are not his family. So it’s seems like he’s got no one truly taking care of him. Honestly Roger is shocked Shanks didn’t just take Luffy with him when he left.

So Roger leaves the island. Stealing one noble son. And taking what he believes to be one free child with him. (There are no parents around to claim him? It’s free real estate) they sail away right as a navy ship is approaching. And Roger would recognize that ship anywhere. It’s Garp! What is Garp doing here? Was Roger that careless with his location. The Oro Jackson hasn’t had a true Marine encounter in years (Rouge is just that good at navigating them under the radar)

Garp sees them, of course he does. Roger sees Garp grab a den den mushi, one that projects his voice across the open sea between them. Roger is expecting his regular speech about how Garp is going to catch them, about how they should surrender, really any of their normal banter.

What he is not expecting is the very loud, very panicked, very angry “give me back my grandson!”

Roger and the crew slowly turn to face the three boys. It’s not Ace. Roger would know if he or Rouge were related to Garp but he still checks Ace off the list.

It can’t be Sabo. Roger can’t imagine a reality where Garp lets his child marry a noble. Plus the kid looks nothing like him.

That leaves Luffy.

“Luffy, what was your name again?” Rouge asked ever patient

“Monkey D. Luffy!” The boy says with confidence. It’s the first time the crew has heard the surname. Well, at least that confirms somethings.

After confirming that yep this is Garp’s grandson. Who he is apparently trying to train to be a marine? Who he’s apparently hit with haki infused punches. (Roger’s been hit with those. They hurt.) Roger grabs their own den den mushi and just calls out “finder keepers.” And they sail away to cannon fire and cursing.

Anyhow the three brothers grow up together on the Grandline. Shanks visits when he can and calls once a week at least if not daily to check in on Luffy and the boys.

Whitebeard definitely crosses paths with Rogers at some point and tries to adopt the boys from him. Rogers would fight him if Rouge wasn’t already fighting Whitebeard over her babies. In the end he becomes the fun uncle. Ace adores him. This is Roger’s worst nightmare! (It’s not. There are way worse things that could happen than his son liking his rival. But Roger loves to be dramatic)

When it’s time to make their own crews Ace and Luffy both decide to start from the East Blue. Getting dropped off by the Roger pirates.

At some point Sabo found out about the revolutionary army and decided that he wanted to join rather than be a pirate. He has his family’s full support (as long as he calls once a week. If he doesn’t they will find him) When he meets his boss for the first time he almost loses his mind and immediately calls Roger’s with a “I think I just met Luffy’s dad!” To which he gets the hilariously confused response of, “You’ve known Shanks since you were ten. What do you mean you just met Luffy’s dad?”

[syeren]

love love love the way you write, could i request gepard smut where he gets jealous of how reader entertain sampo’s shenanigans or flirtations? reader and gepard aren’t officially together but people kinda know that they’re a thing. geoard’s too shy to ask for attention and he doesn’t like how she’s so close to sampo and finally claims her when he reaches his breaking point. knowing this man and his incredible self restraint im just AHHH he snaps

SYEREN ANSWERS: “omg YES?! i absolutely love this request, thank you so much 🥹🫶 i’ll proceed to use gender-neutral pronouns for this. here’s to you, my lovely requester <3”

——————————

BREAKING POINT — GEPARD LANDAU.

RATING: NSFW 18+ (nb-reader (fem. bodied))

GENRE: mix of fluff and jealousy sex

CW & TW: jealous!gepard, possessive!gepard, unprotected s*x, dom!gepard, missionary, mating press, pounding, rough s*x, degrading, possessiveness, sub!reader

SUMMARY: Gepard’s not one to show his emotions, however, when the one he’s admiring is digging into another’s flirtatious actions… How could he not?

NSFW UNDER THE CUT! — MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

It was nothing at first. Nothing at all. But, why is his leg bouncing up and down rapidly? Why is his cheeks reddened with flush? Gepard’s train of thought was absolute mayhem as his blue orbs hovered around your and Sampo’s figure… Again. How long has this been happening? Why is that butt-weasel getting all the attention— your attention… And what for?

You and Gepard decided to spend some time in the Underworld, mainly information to collect for Bronya, but… With how long both of your schedules are and how busy it gets, he figured to volunteer right away to be with you longer. He remembered as his hand shot up to announce his idea to accompany you, a faint blush dusted your cheeks. The rest of your coworkers there looked at each other knowingly, laughing to themselves at how obvious Gepard’s adoration is for you.

But in the current time, he lets out a scoff, shaking his head briskly and refocuses his attention on his chilled liquor and paperwork at his side. The man whom he was throwing daggers at? The infamous, one and only… Sampo Koski. The two were fire and ice: One being a prestigious guard and the other… More known as a sly, cunning looker. Sampo is a charmer which is a trait that Gepard himself doesn’t have, yet in this moment, he longs for it jealously… Well, if it means that he would be the one standing in front of you, that is. He glances up and his eyes almost pop out of his sockets. The azure-haired man reaches up to graze his knuckles against your cheek, and Gepard bites onto his tongue to refrain from breaking the glass he was holding.

“Soot?” you asked, bringing your hand up to brush over the spot Sampo touched, only for him to show his dirtied finger.

He blew off the charcoal dust with a tiny smirk. “You must’ve been in the mines previously… Hey! Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I would’ve made your while,” Sampo laughs, smoothly closing the distance between you two and looking downwards with his staggering height.

You shook your head amusingly and placed a hand on your hip. “Like what? Show me some ‘fun new trick’ you learned that involves pick-pocketing?”

“Lock-picking, actually.”

“Figured.”

Sampo laughs once more, reaching over to casually wind an arm around the small of your back. You shutter slightly due to the coldness of his fingertips, you swore goosebumps were forming around his hand placement. You were about to hit him off lightly until—

“Ahem.”

Your eyes locked onto Gepard, who was now lingering dangerously close to your side. His hand reached behind your back to pry off Sampo’s fingers, flicking them off irritatedly.

“Off,” he merely stated, his tone dripping with venom.

Sampo blinked a couple of time before dryly laughing it off, waving his hand in the air. “Ay big guy! It’s all in good fun, plus I haven’t seen them in so long—“

“And that gives you the right to touch them?”

The tension between the two towering men increased as the seconds passed, with Gepard losing it little by little every breath he took. Sampo chuckled and slowly walked closer to Gepard, looking him straight in the eye.

“… Think you own them or something?” he spat, his palms resting comfortably on his hips. “Coward?”

Your own anxiety rose as you quickly went to stop the two, sighing deeply before you spoke. “Knock it off, this is stupid—“

“— And says you?” Gepard interjected firmly, but this time, his voice sounded calmer than angry. He chuckled once and stepped back, gently lacing his fingers around your wrist and tugging you along with him.

“Where are you taking me?” you asked worriedly, concerned that he’s in a really bad mood.

“No where special.”

—

A small, dingy closet was what he found in the back of the bar. He almost knocked the wind out of you as he practically launched you inside. You had barely managed to regain your balance until he trapped you in between his sturdy arms, using the dusty wooden table behind you effectively.

“Gepard?”

His breaths were shallow and heavy, the scent of his cologne and musk intensifying around you as you looked up at him. He was looking directly into your eyes, piercing through your soul but had a slight softened look to it. A pleading look. An agonizing, pained look for release.

“… Not another word,” he spoke calmly and immediately ripped the armour off of him, along with his shirt. The heavy clanking of metal resounded against the floorboards beneath you two.

Perhaps it was the fluorescent light beaming down on you two, or the half-lidded eyes he had on his expression… But he looked ethereal. The dirty blonde locks cascaded down his forehead and his skin shone with a slight gleam due to sweat. The cloud of lust drowned any sense of fear as his hands busied themselves to lock behind your head, cradling your jaw with one hand and the other resting on your nape.

A tiny mewl escaped your lips as you hungrily welcomed his tongue that shot straight into your mouth. The warmth of the muscle explored the surface of your canines, until prodding his own tongue with your own. Taken-a-back is an understatement, you never knew Gepard would be so… Good, real good. Who knew the shy and obedient man would have a hidden side?

As you were trying to keep up with his movements, Gepard’s voice lowered in a hushed manner.

“… Tell me whenever to stop,” he whispered, not wanting to hurt you or to cross any more boundaries. You can tell just from looking at him that reality was slowly starting to sink in. In turn, you placed a hand behind his neck and pushed him once more to your lips.

“Mmgh!”

A choked up grunt evoked from his mouth but soon after, he sunk deeper into the intimacy, the feeling of holding you, touching you… To Gepard, this was the moment to finally show you how much he loved you. A primal yet desperate instinct grew within him, it was competitive— The feeling to win you over, the feeling to completely lose himself in you, to be able to do that spoke volumes for the man who represented perseverance himself.

He let his hands trail down to the back of your knees, hoisting you up and setting you on top the wooden table. The dim light coming from the bulb created perfect shadows of his muscles. He was well built throughout the years fighting and wearing thick, heavy armour. A sense of pride flooded in him as he watched you carefully drink his physique in, captivated.

“Don’t make me nervous now,” he jokingly added, a tinge of pink blooming on his cheekbones. “Got Sampo wrapped around your pretty little finger, hmm?”

A breathy chuckle left your lips, falling into lust as he nudged your head to the side to bite along the column of your neck.

“A chatter, that man,” you added and subconsciously spread your legs, allowing him to dive in deeper into your body.

“I can’t disagree with him either,” he responded quickly.

He took that split second and didn’t waste any time, calloused palms dragging across the plush of your thighs to push it further apart. The sound of the rustling of his pants made you look and he slowly unbuckled the leather with one hand, pulling it downward.

“Are you—“

“No, I’m preparing you first,” he whispered, trailing his light fingertips from your navel to the edge of your underwear. You were caught by surprise as Gepard’s finger tracks down your clit and rubs it slowly, teasingly. A delicious yet agonizing, dull sensation bubbled within your lower abdomen.

Tiny mewls and gasps left your parted lips, enticing Gepard to go more into rhythm, drinking in the lustful noises that he was producing. This was the reality of the situation, created by the tension between him and Sampo. And now, he couldn’t help the slow rise of his boner, growing an even larger tent within his tight slacks. He wedged his lip inbetween his teeth, chewing it harshly until specks of blood dotted around the abrasion.

He’s the one bringing out these beautiful noises you’re making. Not Sampo. Him.

The beat of his fingers increased, swiping side to side, in circles… Abusing the swollen bundle of nerves of yours. His hawk eyes pierced onto your face, analyzing the shortness of breath, the way your eyes were screwed shut. This only, and merely, egged Gepard on.

“G-Gonna cum,” you announced weakly, knocking your head back onto the wall. Just as the tension built up, it ended abruptly. The heavenly sensation of your bursting release cut short. A tiny whine evoked in you as you glared at Gepard in irritation. He laughed at your expression, hovering over your crumbled physique with both arms caging you in.

Gepard gave you a lop-sided smile and a tilt to his head. “I like that expression. Suits you.”

You sent him another stare of judgement, feeling the heavenly release slowly return back to your normal state. Gepard merely scoffed, jokingly, and yanked his pants along with his boxers down.

“What? Cat got your tongue? Use your words—“ he grabbed your chin and gently caressed your jaw, looking down at you.

“— Or use your mouth.”

You shut yourself up mentally and lowered yourself from the desk, your pride being on the line as well as your aching core. It’s still unbelievable. This wasn’t anything you expected of Gepard; the shy, chivalrous man you once knew vanished in a second, in this dimly lit closet.

Your gaze trailed down his abdomen to his erect penis, the sound of the tip slapping against his skin caused a gulp to rise in your throat. He adorned a large size, stretching out at seven inches — give or take — erect, with pretty blue veins decorating the sides and reaching towards his pelvis. You gave him experimental licks along the shaft, right along those veins popping out of the sheerness of his skin. He was soft, so soft… And warm. The same pink hue of the angry tip matched the shell of his ears.

A strained groan came from him and as you peered up, his head was craned all the way back. The beauty of his was all you could focus on, wanting to mark it up with your own kisses; the way it connected to the angular shapes of his collarbones, to the chisel of his adam’s apple.

“Y-You’re good,” he commented, his breathing erratic as he narrowed his gaze onto you. “Got Sampo as your practice partner—“

A loud slurping noise cut his remark, a moan bordering a whimper erupted from Gepard as you angrily swirled your tongue around, and shoved him all the way down your throat. You released his cock from your puffy lips with a pop, dazing at him intensely. Was he…

“Jealous?” you teased, only to erupt another irritated expression from him. However, it was more than just plain jealousy. Gepard looked at you with a blank stare and suddenly lifted you up by your underarms and shoved open your thighs. He didn’t mutter a single word, instead, aligning his fat cock head to your aching hole. He paused, looking at you cautiously and carefully in case you wanted to deject. A tinge of pink coated the apples of your cheeks, and you instinctively reached to interlock his long fingers with yours.

“Mhm— Eugh!“

He slammed into you, sucking in a harsh breath and made his movements stagnant for a second. A loud throaty noise ripped from your chest, the delicious stretch pulsating and tingling from your cunt, shooting straight up to your head. You took that brief moment to let your body mold around his heated dick, before peering up at him with tears welling in your eyes — a signal to go.

His insatiable, animalistic instincts were the only thing that controlled his body. The wet sounds and bodily noises emitting within the room only gave Gepard more fuel to his fire. You, whose neck was craned all the way up, screamed at the euphoric waves of pleasure. Gepard leaned forward more, licking long stripes along the column of your neck and left vivid hickeys; the blues and purples bloomed on your body, like flowers painted by monet.

“Y-You… Look so beautiful,” he mumbled out, staring at you like you were a blessing sent down by the Aeons themselves. He lifted your hips up and slammed his cock back inside, heavy balls slapped against your puffy lips. Breathy moans and the stench of sex, you dropped your face against his shoulder and cried out.

“… So pretty,” he chanted once more, and kissed your forehead. His left arm trailed down your stomach and with his free hand, he parted your folds with his middle and index fingers. He stared at your core, it was glistening in the cheap fluorescent lamp above the two of you. He tilted his head and blew lightly at your clit, which caused you to buckle at your legs.

You let out a strangled mewl, wrapping your arms around his neck. You felt a twitch from his cock and a bubbly sensation rose in the pit of your stomach. It was all so lewd, his length stretched you out so deliciously as he rammed his hips nonstop, his demeanor from before was irritated, and now you were left with the touch-starved shell of a man.

Perhaps it’s due to the strong, pent-up emotions you hold for him, but you grasped onto the back of his head and kissed him— A kiss where it wasn’t merely a gesture of lust, or just because you two were in a sexual act… A battle between pleasure, lust, affection were evident, and the craving to portray your true emotions in that sloppy act. His speed became staggered, irregular thrusts entered and exited your squelching cunt in an inconsistent manner.

“F-fuck! I’m gonna—“ Gepard announced and grumbled various strings of profanity. He searched for your hands once more and intertwined them, looking down at you through glossy eyes.

“Cum with me,” he pleaded, regaining a sense of momentum with his hips. It was almost like a spell — his words — and it echoed in your head. A tinge of pleasure shot from your abdomen and your legs started to shake intensely.

“Shit,” you groaned, whining as the release was nearing. Gepard took notice, immediately feeling you clamp down on his dick harder. He spilled his seed into you, and following after, you creamed around his dick; his hips stuttering wildly. Your walls clenched and you felt the warmth of his cum paint your insides. He kept his hips still and the fluttering of your walls gave him slight overstimulation, cock-warming you while keeping you from leaking out his seed.

His heavy weight fell against your body, the weight of his heart too. Tears welled up in his eyes and he hid his face, holding onto you more tightly than before. From your teary-eyed vision and exhausted state, he gave you a slight glance to make sure you were okay. He quickly covered you with his guard uniform, shielding you from the sudden cold of the closet.

“Don’t… Talk to him. At least alone. And only with me.”

“You know I never had feelings for him, right?” You asked, still trying to catch your breath. You raised your shaking hands to slot them against his reddened cheeks.

“Yes love… But, he’s still Sampo, gets on my nerves, I couldn’t sit there and watch him do that vile act,” he sternly replied, however reverting back to his old self once more. You chuckled at his embarrassment, scratching the crown of his head lovingly.

“All Sampo knows is how to steal $10,000 from naïve people and break-and-enter the most weirdest places,” you stated, chuckling as Gepard tightens his hold around you, shying away his face. He straightens up and helps you wear your clothing, making sure to also gently wipe any fluids or dirt on your body with his own sleeve.

“He’s still another guy, Y/N. So from now on…” Gepard trails off, removing a Belobog Silvermane Guard insignia from the coat draped around you. With the pin still in hand, he fastens it onto the lapel of your jacket, the lustre gleaming out and proud.

“You’re mine. And if Sampo needs physical evidence, that pin can do wonders… If not, make sure I’m with you. I don’t mind giving him a show either.”

—

an; i am so sorry this took so long, i swear i saw your request as soon as you sent it, but college finals have been draining me quick </333 thank you for your patience!!! (also there may be grammar errors or spelling mistakes, heavily apologize for such things 🫶🙏)

[nell0-0]

Could you possibly do a fic where the Chain meet Legend's cucco companion, Piyoko? I want to see their reactions to her :D

Sure thing! Sorry for the wait, but here it is ^^

Main characters: Legend, Four, Wild, Wind & Warriors (+Piyoko, of course!)

“Legend, don’t freak out, but don’t you dare move.”

…Not exactly the words one would like to hear first thing in the morning before coeherency made its appearance on his brain, but he would have to deal as usual, Legend figured. What went wrong now?

“…why” Legend said, voice thick with sleep and slightly slurred despite his best attempt.

Turning the other way and sleeping this problem away was so tempting. Problem he wasn’t aware of, mind you, because he could more or less glimpse everyone else around camp. Either sleepy, still snoring or staring at Legend with an intensity only deserved for a dangerous foe or-

“There’s a-“

Legend reached above his head, his hand colliding with something soft, a familiar texture greeting his cautious fingers.

“Wait, stop!”

“Goddesses, he’s doomed.”

“Legend, noooo!”

Grabbing whatever it was, a suspicious squeak as a result, Legend used his elbows to hold his weight while he looked at the cause of alarm for the three dumbasses in front of him.

“Pyo!”

…a cuccoo. Well, at least it wasn’t a tiny monster out for his blood. Even though that description adhered to cuccoos most days. Not to this one, chirping excitedly at seeing Legend’s messy face with dry drool still on the side of his mouth.

The others (just three of them, at least) had jumped back. He had expected the over the top reaction from the champion, who was wieling a soup ladle as if it was a weapon. Not so much from Wind who shouldn’t know what they were since he didn’t have them on his era and he hadn’t yet been attacked by an angry flock on this adventure. Definitely wasn’t expecting Four with a… cane? A magic cane.

A magic cane he hadn’t told Legend about. Darn it.

“Really, guys? First thing on the morning?”

“Why are you so calm about this?” Wind squinted at Legend, taking Wild’s soup ladle and poking at Legend’s face with the round edge. Wild shot Wind a betrayed look, who shrugged in response gesturing at Legend in a baffled manner.

Four’s eyes seemed to shimmer a myriad of colors, his face contorting awkwardly as if he couldn’t decide on whether he should laugh, get concerned or scold them all and go back to sleep.

“Guys, it’s okay, it’s just Piyoko.”

Holding the cuckoo, no longer the little chick she had been while on their adventures with Din’s troupe and the Nayru fiasco, Legend cooed. Wind poked at Legend again, bewildered. The look Piyoko threw the sailor was murderous, the poor kid backing off as if burnt and abandoning the wooden ladle to its uncertain fate. In retaliation, Wild flicked the kid on the forehead, quick to retrieve yet another soup ladle from his seemingly infinite supply on that slate of his.

Why soup ladles? Why not swords. Goddesses knew Wild never had enough of those with the rate he kept breaking them at.

Only Four seemed coherent enough to get them back on track from their usual shenanigans, despite being the less alert of the three.

“Piyoko?”

“Piyoko” Legend smirked. Four’s eyebrow twitched.

“And who’s Piyoko supposed to be? Aside from a cuccoo, I mean.”

“My cuccoo.” At the united front of three unimpressed heroes, Legend relented. “I’ve raised this mayhem bird from before she hatched from the egg.”

“What.”

How eloquent, Wind.

The commotion had seemed to catch Warriors’ attention. Or maybe he had been listening the whole time and Legend had just not noticed. Give him a break, he had just been rudely woken up without a good reason from his power nap after the second shift of the night watch. If he wanted to be grumpy or mad about that fact, he was well within his rights.

Either way, as usual, Legend thought while rolling his eyes out of habit, the war captain butted in the conversation.

“Is that a hero spirit thing, raising cuccoos?”

When Wild and Four shot him bewildered looks, probably questioning if Warriors also had a hidden cuccoo somewhere, Warriors was quick to deny it. Weird.

“If it is, then maybe that’s where Linkle gets it from.”

Legend stared at Wind uncomprehendingly. No way someone had named their daughter that, right? Right?

“Exactly my point.”

Okay, nevermind, apparently Linkle was a thing now, and both the captain and the sailor seemed to know her. How that was possible since, supposedly, none of them had met before this journey of nine heroes, was anyone’s guess. But neither asked about Ravio living in his house earlier that week, despite those two also impossibly knowing the scammer, so Legend wouldn’t ask about this either.

Four sighed, as if incredibly tired of this conversation already — Legend had been the one woken up, not Four, the nerve — he asked “and who’s Linkle?”

“My sister.”

Wild stared. “Your what.”

“You have a sister?”

“Not the point!” Warriors flushed, pointing at Legend. Trying to redirect the dumbass trio’s attention back to him, it seemed. That fucker. “Why are you asking me about my sister when Legend is still holding that cuccoo like nothing!”

Maybe if he was more awake, or if Legend wasn’t secretly elated that Piyoko had sneaked out to join him that day, he wouldn’t have said the next words. As it was, he was way too tired to care.

“To be fair” all eyes snapping in his direction, Legend grinned. “I threw Piyoko at Ganon.”

…

“Why did I never think of that.” Wild stared off at the morning sky, looking as if the world had opened new possibilities he hadn’t been aware of before. It was probably accurate, too.

Four just gaped at Legend, for once at a loss of words.

“She almost plucked an eye out. It was awesome.”

“Weaponized cuccoos.”

“Terrifying.” Wind may have said that, but the glint on his eye told another story.

Warriors took a step to the side, putting some distance between himself and the sailor, seemingly having an internal crisis.

Huffing, Legend dropped his weight on top of his bedroll again, Piyoko flapping her little wings before gently settling on top of his head. While the others woke up and those four got their shit together, Legend was sure he could manage to sleep another five minutes.

[wonderingpanda]

Remember back in high school the juiciest gossip was always about someone like-like-ing someone else? Will you write headcanons or something about the Mayhem boys hearing a rumor about someone (Reader) like-like-ing them? What would they do with this super important information?

I just really need some fluffy goofy high school shenanigans now-a-days.

Have You Heard?

MM!Turtles x Reader

This was so much fun to write. I loved adding hints of my own comedy and little cliches while giving each turtle their own individual story to follow. Thank you for the request, enjoy!

Leo

This was unexpected

Oh this was VERY unexpected

See Leo was a loser

He didn’t get to be cool, he didn’t get to be  smart, he didn’t get to be funny and he didn’t get the girl

At least that’s what he thought

According to April though, this was entirely inaccurate

According to April, you’d had a crush on him for the last month

Someone went a whole MONTH harbouring romantic feelings for him!

And not just anyone; his cool, pretty friend whom he had fallen head-over-heels for the first day they met

This was unbelievable!

Of course his brothers didn’t believe him

I mean, why would they? According to them, he naturally makes girls gravitate away from him

Now it’s not like you knew April told Leo this

You had simply shared the information during a sleepover and blindly trusted her

A bad choice really considering sharing news was her whole gig

Still you were none-the-wiser the next day as to why Leo was anxiously pulling at his shirt

Or why he avoided your eyes like the plague

Or why when you chose to sit next to him in geography he felt like his heart was about to erupt

You had no clue

So what was Leo to do in this situation?

Trust in April’s words and confess his feelings, risking the possibility of making things more awkward?

Or stay silent and let fate decide when was right, risking losing the chance to be with you forever?

It was a tough choice

But Leo’s a wimp so obviously he wasn’t going to say anything

That was until his brothers forced him to

Donnie had cleverly hacked his computer to send an email to you, asking you to meet in one of the art rooms

He in turn did the same to your computer and gave explicit times to ensure you both crossed over

It was believing those emails that lead you to to your current situation

Locked in an art room by April and Leo’s insufferable brothers, forced to wait it out until you found a way to escape

Heart pounding, mind racing and palms sweating

Leo knew exactly what they wanted out of you two and he had no idea how to do it!

So… Guess we’re stuck, in here … Seems like it’ll be a while- Did I upset you Leo? What, no!? Really? Cause you’ve been acting weird all day Not because of you! Well it sure seems like it’s because of me! How!? You literally made a point to stare at nothing but the ground the second I tried talking to you today! I was nervous! Why were you nervous!? Because I really like you! I really, really like you And I guess the thought that you might like me back is so thrilling it’s kind of terrifying But I-I don’t expect you to feel the same, I get this is probably off-putting with the green and the shell and the baldness- Leo! You grabbed his head and forced him to finally meet you face-to-face No tan, hair-covered, bare-backed guy could ever make me feel the way I do for you

You quickly kissed him and upon pulling away realised he had melted into a puddly, flustered mess

And you were released from the art room

Eventually

In the end it was a win-win

April got to succeed in her matchmaking schemes, you got to kiss the turtle of your dreams, Leo got a girlfriend and his brothers had something new to tease him about

Ok, so maybe it wasn’t a 100% win for Leo but close enough

Raph

Raph had met you first when he joined the wrestling club at school and you just so happened to be there

You also happened to be there when he tried out for the track team

And footy team

And basketball team

And cricket team

And just about every single sport he experimented with

For some reason you were consistently always there, always in his head with your stupid pretty face and swooshy hair and bright eyes and dumb little smile

GOD WHY WERE YOU ALWAYS THERE &$!#%!!??

Well… since you seemed to follow him everywhere Raph figured he may as well befriend you

And you two got along well, soon enough it seemed like he had found his new best friend

Also it may have turned out that you’d been widely involved in the school’s sport program for years but we don’t talk about that!

Anyhow, you guys stuck together pretty consistently

Always hanging out and goofing off, ranting about teachers and friends

In a weird way you were also each other’s therapists, being forced to be the reasonable one whenever the other was in a firey state

His brothers greatly appreciated it as it meant they had to deal with less violent endeavours from him

If only Donnie hadn’t been feeling so bored that day, maybe then he’d still be alive

Or at least have a chance of living to the next day

See you and Raph had just been chilling at your locker while you grabbed stuff for class

No biggie, the closest you contact you had was Raph’s arm being slightly around you

But when Donnie came around and saw you two he couldn’t think of a better way to brighten his day than to embarrass his brother in front of the girl he’d been talking about for weeks

So as he walked by he slyly turned to you two, eyebrows raised and commented “You two look comfy” before contently strutting off

Raph’s face blended in with his mask as he stared angrily at his brother’s back

I’m gonna kill him Don’t I have P.E with him today

Donnie ended up returning home with a LOT of bruises that day

But it was worth it for the information he managed to squeeze out of you

All which he spouted to Raph like a proud toddler

Raph didn’t believe him

He genuinely didn’t

No way you had a crush on him

You liked to watch him wrestle for the fight not the visuals

And the only reason you were insistent on having him at your locker every morning was so you had someone to talk to. You’d replace him with any of your friends if they arrived earlier

Also, the fact that you showed off your muscles to him at a swim competition was purely to brag and in no way hinting towards any feelings!

Raph knew you didn’t like him and he could prove it

So Donnie dared him to ask you

Then after regaining consciousness, told Raph he’d call him out for being a wimp if he didn’t

3 beatings in one day, way to go Donnie!

So Raph wasn’t feeling too psyched the next day when he was talking to you and noticed Donnie’s lingering gaze but a guy’s gotta do what a guy’s gotta do (terrible under other context but you get the point)

Ok Y/n, now this is totally random but stupid Donnie has been nagging me to ask you. Do you like me? Like, like-like me Donnie told you that? No he just wanted me to ask- Well he’s right Huh? He told me you feel the same way, I’m assuming you do After all it would make sense as to why you’re constantly displaying signs of high dopamine, noradrenaline, releases of phenethylamine and hormonal changes around me I don’t know what any of those words mean but I love you You turned to him with a genuine smile I love you too, but it has only been a few weeks so can we just take things a bit slow for now? Uh huh Awesome

You gripped the top of his plastron and pulled the lovestruck turtle into a small kiss

Sadly you were torn apart when an annoying voice called out from across the hall

I told you so!

He bolted, but at least you two had managed to get together. Raph may have actually killed Donnie otherwise

Donnie

You and Donnie were childhood friends, platonic besties, a power duo of friendship

There were no romantic feelings between you two AT ALL

…

So it started in maths

You, Donnie and Leo were being the ultimate nerd trio, figuring out equations and such when one of the annoying kids, Harvey, thought it would be funny to call out

Hey Donnie! Did you know Y/n likes you!?

Some kids started laughing and others talking while you sat there with your face beet red

Donnie’s face flushed as he stumbled over his words, desperately trying to defend you which he didn’t succeed well in

He did take note of your reaction to the whole scenario which peaked his interest

(Side note: Leo did slightly enjoy the whole thing, finally not the butt of the joke 😃)

After that day Donnie’s thoughts grew

He had pictured these scenarios a thousand times in his head but never had they felt so possible

Asking you out, you asking him out, going on dates, exchanging gifts, hugging, crying, kissing

Then it happened again, sort of

He and Raph were leaving class together

Easy, simple, completely normal

Till a random girl, who he recognised as your friend, yelled from behind

Donnie, do you like Y/n!?

He panicked. What was he meant to say?

He couldn’t say yes, what if you didn’t like him? But what if you did like him?

However, they were getting further away and he only had seconds to answer

So he made the “smartest decision of his life” and called back

U-uh, um, no!

Since then you’d been more distant

And with all this evidence; Donnie became a full analyst

He noted down your behaviours, how you acted before and now

How your interests changed with him, when you were louder and quieter, what gestures you made to hint any feelings

He looked deep and saw all the signs

Sadly you were still pretty distant after what you heard from your friend and Donnie was determined to change that

First off, he tried to initiate more conversation and when you attempted to cut it short he kept pushing

No matter how hard his social anxiety was screaming he knew he had to keep conversations going

He also kept making an effort to sit next to you

Any scenario be it lunch, class or just general group hangouts; he was always by your side

And after a week or so when you seemed to be loosening up more he chose to take things a step further with physical contact

He’d give you a high-five, fist bump or hug as a greeting

Maybe lean on your shoulder or get closer when you were showing him something

Sometimes if he was feeling particularly happy he’d sneak his hand over yours

Soon enough, it seemed like you had finally gotten over everything and were back to your old self. But there was still something you had to address

Lunch time, alone. That’s when you chose to bring it up

Donnie, do-um… did uh my friend ever tell you anything a few weeks ago? He began choking on his food *Cough* N-no uh why? Well it’s just that the last few days you’ve been different Different how? Uh… just small stuff like the hand thing and I guess you’ve seemed a bit closer Oh! I mean psh, I just thought you were upset or something so I wanted to cheer you up, no big deal You thought I was upset? Why? Well you were acting more distant and I didn’t want to bring it up cause I thought it might be sensitive so I figured I’d just help on the side, you know? That’s actually really sweet. But are you sure there’s no other reason for it? Uh nope! None, I mean why else would I want to hug you and hold your hand and stuff it’s not like I have a crush on you. Cause that- that would be crazy you and me together like whaaat? A mutant and a human who, how!? Donnie Yes Did you lie to my friend? Maybe … So it wouldn’t be weird if we dated? I’d love it if we dated

Of course you kissed and both of you loved it

Donnie had never felt this happy in his whole life, not even when they saved the city!

And he had enough blackmail to shut his brothers up if they ever tried teasing you two

Mikey

You two were the best of buddies

Two peas in a pod

Always acting and performing at each others side

Mikey loved it

Mikey loved you

And the day he heard you may feel the same caused his mind and heart to simultaneously explode

It was Leo, of course it was Leo

They were in art discussing the struggles of having human crushes

It was when Leo said “At least yours likes you back” that he knew he screwed up

Mikey wasn’t panicked though, Mikey’s Mikey

He was of course very happy when he heard the news and didn’t leave Leo alone about it for days

Every waking moment was spent getting updates from Leo and insights into your friend group

And whenever you two saw each other be it before school, after school, breaks, in class or at improv, he was ecstatic

This guy just couldn’t get enough and made every effort to let you know he liked you

Soon enough he felt like he had enough confirmation on your feelings and gained the confidence to just go for it

It was during a game of freeze tag when he tapped out the person you were previously with and started a new scene

Jessie! Hey, thank gosh I found you Lucas, what’s up? I haven’t seen you in a while Oh well, you know, I’ve just been busy; things have been a bit different lately Different how? Well the word is that someone I know likes me but I just don’t know who That sure is a dilemma Yeah, if it’s the person I think it is though I recon it’ll end pretty well You got some hopes do you? Ahh just someone, nothing to worry about I don’t know if you’re associated Try me Alright well… they have h/c hair ooh and pretty e/c eyes! They’re also one of my closest friends and I don’t think they realise just how much I like them Wow Lucas that must be really keeping you on edge Yeah, if only I knew who it is At this point you and Mikey had moved so close to each other your hands were almost touching Mikey I- FREEZE!

And just like that, the scene was over

But not the story

At the end of the rehearsal you and Mikey walked out of school together and the discussion of feelings was unavoidable

You two were walking silently side-by-side till he finally said it

I like you Y/n Do you like me back? I like you so much Mikey you don’t even know

His face lit up as he cheerfully pulled you into a hug and spun around

You took the opportunity as he slowed down, cupped one of his cheeks and planted a kiss on his lips

From that day forward Mikey got to walk around boasting about having the greatest partner in all of New York

And you went on to kick Leo’s butt for exposing your secret so easily

Again, I loved writing this so much. Also I think I’m going to use indented for my Headcanons from now on (although I guess they’re more listed stories at this point). Anyway thank you for reading and please, have an awesome day/night wherever you are!✨

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Could you do the OM bros seeing a friendly, opmistic, kind , funny Mc who's actually a cunning and a manipulative seducer/seductress. Always keeping a poker face in order to get what they want which is power and gets away with it but the brothers realize it too late( I know Lucy, Satan and Belphie are smart enough but It is possible for them to get "tricked" by Mc since they love them.)

Two-Faced Reader | Yandere Obey Me!

Power is what you’re after and you’re used to doing whatever you feel like to get it. Including acting like the innocent lamb that gets all of them wrapped around your fingers. Now whether you intended for their infatuation with you or not it's bound to further your agenda or more likely their own:

Leviathan 

“Whooooa talk about mad twists!”

Thinks it's hot when you switch from the sweet ingenue to domineering master 

Kind of likes the way switch 

And the curiousness if its some condition and you only do it with him

Oh how he hopes

At your command, he summons Lotan on the daily 

Sometimes completing sidequests without you telling him

Like offing those conspiratory NPCs

Satan

“I see what game your playing and I’m intrigued.”

He knows your games

And man does he love playing them

Your ambition rivals his own and he can’t help but want to encourage you

He’s not going to say he’s whipped but he’s certainly willing to cause all kinds of mayhem in your name

A shame that he’s not roped in by your fake personality

Asmodeus

“Oya~my baby wants them gone? Promise to give me kisses?”

He falls head first for you’re precious persona

So innocent, so cute

It makes pining for you all the more fun

And killing for you even more satisfying

He’s someone who’s not going to flip when you’re personality shines through

Your still his sexy lamb 

And he so badly wants to keep you

Even if it means using his beauty to deceive those who get in your way

And the ones he just doesn’t like

Beelzebub

“Don’t accuse them of such things, they hardly know how devildom works.”

Falls hook line and sinker for your persona 

No doubt easily deceived by your little acts

And in your defense, he’ll eat just about anyone 

Even when it’s revealed, the truth of your true colors he can’t help but still believe

That you’d been deceived 

That underneath the cunning persona is still the poor human that needs protection

And is number one in your crew for most likely to usurp 

You don’t know what you’re doing so maybe he and Belphie should bother with the bad guys out there

Belphegor

“...Right. But they still want that one out of the way and we promised to do that right?”

Sees right through you 

And originally isn’t all that fond of Beel’s perception of you

He thinks you tricked his sweet brother 

But in a way, he finds that he agrees

You're a stupid, in over your head human

And who better to intervene in your shenanigans than the two of them 

Plus he enjoys your bloodthirsty behavior

Though it's nothing compared to his murderous drive you’re still cute

If anyone is more likely to initiate the usurpation its him

Lucifer

“You think you’re so slick, I can’t help but be enamored.”

He doesn’t immediately see it

Playing into your hands for a short while 

Before catching on and switching from compliance and not

He thinks both sides of you are cute

But you're just so naive to think enabling their murderous tendencies will end with only who you’ve designated a threat

He and his brothers can easily see more than you 

So trust in that

[ectoberhaunt]

Ectoberhaunt 2023: Science VS Magic

Dear Phandom new and old, sorry for the delay but this here is our 2023 theme and prompt list! Once again we've changed it up a little to make it a little easier on all of us, and to invite fun and mayhem Phandom wide! Prompts are once again Monday-Friday, with Friday being singular prompts, and weekends being (mostly) free as catch up days. The only real change is our new 'isekai weekend' on the 21st and 22nd, with two different sub prompts for the days. Isekai is a subgenre of anime in which a character ends up in a different place or world all together. It literally translates to 'otherworld'! The two prompts for this weekend are 'past prompt', where we want to see the Phandom use a prompt from either of our previous calendars. The other is 'portal shenanigans'. We highly encourage you to create crossover content and AUs you've wanted to play with. As always, our last prompt day is October 24th to make way for the Ectober Week event. This means our free days are the 1st, 7th, 8th, 14th, 15th, with the 25th-31st being @ectoberweekofficial's time to shine. Please tag all prompt fills as "Ectoberhaunt23", and follow the additional posting guidelines below!

Posting for this event begins October 2nd!

Down below are our written out calendar prompts (for accessibility) AND our posting guidelines. Check 'em out!

The Prompts

Below are the listed prompts in date order, if it's blank it's a catch up day. First prompt is Science, second is Magic!

-

Tecnomancy vs Botonamancy

Black Cat vs White Crow

Aliens vs Zombies

Hunt vs Haunt

Tabletop

-

-

Robots vs Dragons

Pseudoscience vs Occultism

Dread vs Calm

Obsession vs Repression

Horror Flick

-

-

Revenant vs Death Echo

Blood vs Flesh

Unravel vs Intertwine

Claws vs Horns

Danse Macabre

Isekai: Past Prompts (2021 | 2022)

Isekai: Portal Shenanigans

Technus vs Magic

Science vs Dora Ectober Week!

coming soon

coming soon

coming soon

coming soon

coming soon

coming soon

coming soon

Post Guidelines

The following are the posting guidelines. Please follow them so we can reblog and share your posts without issue. We will also have this as a post available on our blog separately.

Tag all posts with “Ectoberhaunt23” so we can find it. If you do not use this tag, we may not find you.

Tag which calendar you're pulling from (“EH Science” or “EH Magic”), which day the prompt is for ("Day X"), and which prompt(s) you completed ("Eyes" "Teeth"). Example: #ectoberhaunt23 #EH science #day 5 #hunt Single day prompts, such as the ones on Friday, do not need a tag for which calendar it's for.

Put your fics under a readmore. Add a summary before the cut with a short preview, content warnings, and which prompts were used. Then, add a readmore no more than 150 words or 10 lines/groups of text under your summary. If you're using mobile, type :readmore: and hit enter to make a readmore. If you do not do this, we will NOT reblog your post.

Make sure to tag all common content warnings (blood, gore, death, drugs, body horror, existentialism, & vermin)

We will try to reblog every prompt we can. Feel free to @ us in the post too or send us a DM with the post!!

Feel free to shoot us an ask about rules/clarifications and any queries on prompts. Our discord is open as are our messages.

Here is a spreadsheet you can use to track your progress made by the talented @ajitated

Title graphic by @kawaiijohn | Calendar graphics by @ajitated

[rebeliz7]

More than anything

Wanda Maximoff x Super Soldier!Reader

Warnings: Killgrave shenanigans - forced acts - descriptions of blood - fighting - quite a bit of fighting.

Request: What about a Wanda maximoff x powered fem reader where Killgrave gets to the reader and forces her to fight the avengers and try to kill them and Wanda is the only one who can stop her.

Word Count: 4520

…

You don’t believe in bad omens. At least you’ve never been one to pay that sort of thing any mind. 

When you enter Tony’s lab and you notice him atop a large iron ladder, trying to reach a vent, you’re wondering why he isn’t using one of his suits to levitate so high that you end up walking right underneath the open ladder. 

The weird this is---you notice it, and a weird heavy weight settles in the pit of your stomach because of it. 

“That’s bad luck, you know?” Sam tells you as he walks inside as well. 

“It’s just a ladder, Wilson.” You try to brush it off but he shrugs his shoulders, and you kind of hate him for telling you that.

“Not what my mom used to say.” He says, but you keep the comeback to yourself this time. 

It’s not what Wanda says either, and although you don’t believe in that kind of thing, you’re still aware of superstitions and always try to avoid ‘poking the bear’.  

You talk with Tony and leave his lab quickly. It’s not until much later that you remember this particular moment and that damn ladder. 

… 

The mission was a simple one. Get in, detain the suspects, free the hostages. Simple.

Simple is the furthest from your current situation though. 

When you got to the scene earlier, you quickly noticed the swarm of people willing to fight anyone who tried to get in. The odd part about it is---they all seem to be fighting against their will, as if someone’s forcing them, controlling them. 

“Something isn’t right.” You speak through your coms, as you press your back against a near wall to catch your breath. 

“Talk to me.” Natasha’s voice comes through quickly, but so does another attack. 

You barely avoid the iron bar coming to your head, only to come face to face to the guy that’s gripping said bar with trembling hands and tears running down his pale cheeks. 

You watch him for a split second, but he’s fighting against what he’s doing and the same feeling that washes over you when you walked inside Tony’s lab makes a comeback. 

That damn ladder. 

“Something’s not right, Nat.” You respond, avoiding the guy’s attacks again but refusing to attack him back. 

He screams, coming at you with more attacks, one after another. Taking pity of him, you take the bar off his hands and slap him across the face. He falls unconscious and you catch his body before it hits the ground to lay him down gently.  

“These people are not right.” You tell the team through the coms again, eyes still on the guy that’s on the floor. 

You have a terrible feeling. 

“I agree. It’s like they don’t want to be here. Someone just apologized to me before attacking.” Sam’s voice comes through, and you decide to leave. Better to leave now, and come back with more information than fighting in the dark like this.  

The reports said that you need to stop a group of individuals who are dangerous and seem to be enhanced in some unknown ways, and have been causing mayhem across town. You haven’t seen anyone enhanced so far but that’s not to say that something isn’t right. 

“What do we have here?” A voice speaks, making you halt in your step and turn around slowly. 

A guy, shorter than you and much more skinny, smiles at you. Involuntary shivers run down your spine at the sight of his creepy smile, but you still assess him. 

British accent, in his early forties, purple suit and one hundred percent creepy.  

“Who are you?” You ask him but he just smiles, and walks closer to you.  

“Drop the mics, darling.” The shot of electricity that runs through you at hearing his command, feels like a bucket of ice cold water dripping down your back. 

You do as he says, without resistance and when it’s done, panic begins to build up in the pit of your stomach. You’re terrified. 

“What’s happening?” You ask him, your voice an octave higher and he simply smiles. 

“No talking on your part for now. I’m going to do the talking, and you’re going to listen. Speak only when I tell you to.” He says and tears spring to your eyes when you realize that you can’t talk, even though you want to. “That’s better.” He smiles. 

This is what’s happening here. All these people were ordered by this guy to fight you and now you see it. You need to warn the team, but you don’t know how. 

“First of all,” he says as he runs a finger down your jacket clad arm, making you shiver involuntarily. “Take this off, it's way too hot for anyone to be wearing leather.”

Every cell in your body wants to protest at this particular command, but you take off the jacket just like he wants you to and drop it on the ground. 

You know that you have to warn the others, you have to fight him, you have to stop him---but you can’t move, you can’t even talk. 

“Come over here.” He tells you as he enters a room that leads you down a dark hallway, and you silently follow him. 

“Smile, darling. You’re looking way too serious.” He says over his shoulder and you feel your lips rising up on the edges, and you’re smiling so wide that it’s hurting your cheeks but you continue to do it because you have to and that’s all that matters. 

Doing what he says it’s all that matters. 

“Break this door.” He orders next, when you stand in front of a wooden locked door and without a question you kick it open for him. 

“You remind me of someone.” He says with a bit of melancholy in his tone but when he catches sight of your face, he grimaces and flinches back. “Stop smiling now, you’re creeping me out.” He laughs, and you stop immediately.

“You’re an Avenger, right?” He asks as he guides you down some stairs. “I saw the mighty Captain before I found you all alone in those stairs. Lucky me. Answer.”

“I’m a Winter Soldier.” You answer, and he claps his hands in delight. 

“Oh, this is fantastic! You and I are gonna have so much fun together. Yes, we will!”

He guides you to an underground parking lot and then hands you the keys of a car before getting in the passenger seat, and you follow suit. 

“Be a darling and drive us out of this mess, would you?” He says offhandedly, bored, and you turn on the engine before backing up. 

You drive away from the building and your team doesn’t notice, no one is following you and you want to ask him what will happen with the people he's leaving behind but you still can’t talk freely.

“Take me somewhere safe.” He says after five minutes on the road, and you immediately think of safe houses. “A place where the Avengers won’t find us.” He clarifies and you nod at him.

Pictures of places where the Avengers would never find you pop in you head at his request, and you turn the car around. He smiles, a look you can’t comprehend passing through his eyes, and then your cell phone rings. 

“Who is calling you?” He asks as you retrieve your phone promptly, you see the picture of your girlfriend on the screen and your vision becomes a bit blurry around the edges with the blink of your eyes. 

“My girlfriend.” You tell him and he takes the phone from you, studies the picture for a hot second and then gives it back to you.

“Answer. Tell her that you’ve taken another route back. Tell her you’re okay and that you’ll see her soon.”

Something within you wants to fight back but you slide your fingers across the screen to answer anyway, because you need to do as he says. 

“Hey, babe.” You answer casually. 

“Where are you? Are you okay?” Wanda asks, sounding agitated. “Your coms are down.”

“I’m okay. I’m taking another route back to the Compound.” You tell her, the lie falling easily off your lips and you feel sick to your stomach. 

“Why? What happened?” Wanda asks and you can hear the worry in her voice but you need to say what he told you to say, nothing else matters. 

“I’m okay. I’ll see you soon.” You end the call at once and the man smiles at you, and when he stretches out his hand you place your phone on the palm of his hand willingly. 

He doesn’t speak for the rest of the ride but you feel him watching you, and you can’t resist him at all even though somewhere in the back of your mind you know that you need to. 

When you arrive at a place that you know he’ll be alright, he takes a deep breath before sitting at the head of the dining table, as if this has always been a place known to him and you are an old friend. 

“Come, sit with me.” You sit to his right and with a finger on his lips he seems to be deep in thought.

You’re shaking, afraid out of your mind because the more time you spend with him the more you realize that nothing else matters to you. 

Still, you try to resist the urge. 

“Why were the Avengers there today?” He asks after a beat.

“We were asked to help by the local police.”

“Do they know of me?” He asks and you shake your head. “That’s grand. That’s fantastic! Now!” He claps his hands again, his smile never wavering. “A Winter Soldier, you said?”

“Yes.” 

“That makes you just as strong as Captain America.”

“Yes.”

“Just as lethal as good old Barnes, right?”

“Yes.”

Your head is fuzzy, like you can’t think of anything else besides this man and his words.

“I want you to kill them all.” He says and your head spins, but you don’t know why. All you know is that you need to do as he asks. “I want you to kill all the Avengers and when that’s done I need you back here with me. I have plans for us.”

…

You secure the safe house before you leave. You know exactly where to find the Avengers, you know exactly how to kill them all and you have an order. 

You ditch your car a mile away from the Compound, and you make your way inside without any resistance. You know this place like the back of your hand after all. 

You could just walk through the front door, you realize, but the rifle in your hand would be too suspicious to not raise any alarms. You need them dead, and you need them dead quickly so you can go back to that man. 

You have so many options to take them out, so many ways that they won’t even see coming. 

Groaning to yourself, you keep on walking, trying to ignore why there’s a knot around your throat or why the thought of killing these Avengers pains you so. All you know is that you have an order and you need to fulfill it, you need to do as he asked. 

Nothing else matters. 

You could wait for everyone to go to bed first, but Friday would send an alarm to everyone the moment it recognizes that it’s being hacked and you can’t be found out just yet. You’ll do this without hacking into Friday, it seems. 

… 

You place bombs on every getaway route and wait. The moment the bombs go off, you know Friday will lock them in, activating security protocols. 

When the bombs go off, and everyone tries to run out you’re waiting at the perfect spot for them. 

Sam is the first one to run out. He breaks one of the large windows in the common room, but he doesn’t make it further. You put a bullet in his shoulder, on the only blank spot of his suit just as he’s about to take off flying. 

He falls backwards with force and you curse under your breath. The bullet should have gone into his head, that was the right thing to do. Now he’s injured and in the blue. 

Kill them, he said. 

You have a clear shot to his jugular and you shoot. 

The bullet ricochetes off Captain America’s shield, who just came out through the same window to his help. You instantly try to point at the new target, but Steve throws his shield at you in a split second. 

Rolling backwards, you barely avoid being hit by his shield. Not missing a beat you get ready to shoot again but the look on Steve’s face makes you take a stop. 

“What?” He asks himself, confused. You shake your head, fighting against the cloud of fogginess that’s taking over your vision and the ripping pain that threatens to break you from the inside out. 

Throwing the rifle to the ground, you decide to jump down and meet them halfway but not before checking your chest for wounds. This pain---this pain feels too real to be anything other than physical. 

You don’t know what’s happening anymore. You just know that you need them dead. You need to do as the man said. 

“What is happening?” Wanda asks, finally making an appearance and your eyes meet hers across the yard. 

You want to go to her---but she’s an Avenger.  

“She did this.” Steve tells her and you take a deep breath. You need them dead, you need them all dead.

Not waiting another second, you leap for him, punching him in the jaw before he can see you coming. You need him dead, you just need the Avengers dead. That’s all you know, that’s all you need to do.

Steve fights back, although still confused and reluctant to do so. When he punches you in the jaw, something crosses your mind, recognition. 

He punches you again, making you take several steps back. You need them dead, don’t you?

Looking up, you catch sight of your own reflection in one of the larger windows and you become so dizzy that you almost lose your balance where you stand. 

What are you doing?

“Why are you doing this? You have to stop!” Steve tells you but you’re staring at your reflection because you’re crying, and your tears seem to expand the pain in your chest---your chest that isn’t injured.

“I have to kill you.” You tell him as you turn around to face him one more time. 

Steve frowns, blood dripping down the side of his mouth where you punched him before. The need to scream overtakes you, even more so when you see Sam bleeding out on the ground and Wanda---Wanda who doesn’t seem to be able to move, too confused by what you’re doing. 

You see her in your peripheral vision a second too late. Natasha comes at you from the shadows, and she’s hard to pin down. 

One of her bites hit you in the back, making you fall to your knees, the electricity of it making you grow in pain. Not that it’s enough to keep you down, and she knows it. 

Next, she jumps on your shoulders with one of her signature moves but you’re ready for her this time around. You grab her hair in a tight grip around your fist and pull her forward with all your strenght. 

Her back hits the ground hard and you’re so worked up, that you go after her without a pause. You raise your boot clad foot to stomp on her face but someone pulls you back, making you stumble before you realize who’s come to Natasha’s rescue. 

Steve looks pained, his lip has swollen and you can’t seem to shake the look of Natasha’s terrified expression off your head. 

You need them dead. You just need them dead. You need to do as he said. 

Attacking Steve for a second time is far easier, you know him and you know his weak spots. He grows tired after only a few minutes, as if he’s no match for you at all, and you know you can finish him. 

You almost have him, you can do this fast and you can be back to the man before midnight. You need to get back to him because he has plans. 

Bleeding and tired yourself, you manage to get a hold of his shield. You can taste blood on your tongue, tears running down your cheeks and you’re about to finally end him.

He’s on the ground and you can end him with one hit of his own shield---one single blow and he’ll be dead. You have to. 

“No.” A voice echoes in your ears, inside your head---it vibrates all throughout your body, you feel it in your veins. 

“No.” The voice says again, cutting through the fogginess of your brain like a well sharpened knife, and the pain is unbearable.  

“Stop!” You scream, as you let go of the shield and you fall to the ground, hands on your head and rolling on the grass.

The pain is blinding---it feels like your head is splitting in half. You can’t take it.

“Darling, you need to stop.” The voice says and you scream louder, unable to take the pain that comes with that voice. It’s scrambling your brain, you can feel it. 

“Please.” The voice begs, broken and strained. 

“Stop!” You scream back, finally recognizing the voice. 

You have to kill them. You have to kill them, that’s all that matters. 

“He’s controlling you.” Wanda says, still in your head, her voice resonating only for your ears. 

But you need to go back to him, you need them dead. He’s waiting for you.  

“No, you don’t.” Wanda says, replying to your thoughts. “You don’t need to go back to him. You need to be here. With me. With us. We’re your family.”

Screaming, your voice carries out as you punch the ground so hard that the dirt gives in with the force of your fists.

You can see the forgiveness of your brain slowly lifting, as if it were a drape and someone is finally opening it, letting the light come through. 

It takes a moment for it to sink in, but that blinding need to do as the man told you to do, still palpates within you, although not as strong.

You catch sight of Steve, bleeding on the floor where you left him. His face is bloody, his left eye shut closed and swollen---you almost don’t recognize him, and you did that to him.  

Your hands are splashed with his blood and dirt, and you’re shaking. 

“I need to do this.” You speak out loud. “I need to do this.”

Wanda’s close to you now, tears running down her cheeks as she reaches for you. 

You clutch her hands desperately, but she’s firm as she takes your face and forces you to look at her, although you can’t meet her eyes. 

“Look at me.” She says but her lips aren’t moving, she’s still in your head. “Look at me.”

Hesitantly, you meet her hazel eyes. She’s so strong right now, stronger than you ever thought possible. 

“You have to fight it. You have to fight him out of your mind.” She tells you. 

“You don’t understand.” You cry, head shaking as his command unravels through you. “I need to do what he asked me to do. I need to.”

“No.” She fiercely tells you, her hands anchoring you. “Fight him back.” She orders you---and something within you breaks free.

The light pours in and the pain is so devastating that you fall backwards, clutching your head as everything overwhelms you. 

You scream until your voice begins to waver, until your head feels as if it’s been chopped off and replaced. 

“I can’t.” You cry out when you still need to do as he said, only now you’re aware of it. You know what he asked and you know how wrong it is.   

“Listen to me.” Wanda’s voice orders again, and you will yourself to listen. “You’re stronger than this.”

You’re not, you’re really not. You can’t fight this command.

“I love you so much.” Wanda tells you as you try to stay concious.  “I love you and I need you to fight him out. Do it.”

“I lo - ” Your voice is hoarse and a sob breaks through your lips when you look at her. “I lo - I love you too.”

She sends you a small smile in return and you focus on the images that she’s putting in your head, images of the two of you together and you let her wander your mind until you inevitably pass out. 

…

You wake up with a start, and one hell of a headache. You’re in the medbay and Wanda is sleeping right next to you, her arm firmly wrapped around your middle protectively and you don’t know what to do.

“You kicked our asses.” Natasha casually says from a nearby chair that you didn’t notice before.

Her voice comes accompanied by a wave of guilt that washes over you mercilessly. Especially when you look at her face and catch the fresh bruises adorning it. Bruises that you put there. 

Tears rush to your eyes as everything comes back to you, and you can’t get a grip of yourself.  

“I’m so sorry.” You cry, begging for her forgiveness. Nat’s quick to walk over to you though, and press her lips on your temple for a few long seconds. 

“None of that.” She assures you when she leans back and takes your hand with both of hers. “We tracked your phone. We took precautions and we caught him. He’s on his way to the Rift as we speak. He’ll never get to you, or anyone again.”

You almost bolt out of the bed at hearing that anyone else could have been in close proximity to that man, but Wanda holds you tighter. 

“We got him.” She tells you softly and close to your ear, making you cry even harder.

You cry for long minutes that feel like an eternity. 

You were a Winter Soldier, you’ve been that kind of slave but back then you didn’t know anything, you didn’t know what you were missing, you didn’t even know who you were. 

This man made you a slave while you could still remember your name and the people that you love, he made you go after them and turned your head into a mess in order for you to do what he wanted you to.

“I love you.” Wanda murmurs in your ear again, and again and you hold her just as tight. 

If it weren’t for her---you don’t even want to think about what could have happened if it weren’t for her.

You only raise your head when you hear pouring, and you find Liho walking on your legs. He immediately pokes your mouth with his head and your nose throbs in pain, and you remember that Steve broke it. 

“They’re okay.” Wanda says, her hand on Liho’s head and her lips pressing fleeting kisses on the corner of your lips, as if she can’t be away from you. “Nothing they can’t recover from.”

“They’ll be fine.” Natasha says offhandedly as she picks up her cat from your chest and you grip Wanda’s arm to keep her close. “I’m gonna take this one up for some food, and I’ll put something together for dinner. Come up in thirty.”

You nod, still a bit uncertain that you deserve her care after what happened but thankful nonetheless.

“Thanks, Nat.” Wanda says for the both of you and then she sits up on the bed, her hands never leaving yours. You watch as she kisses your bruised knuckles, and you love her so much that your breath comes out short. 

“I think I knew.” You say and she gives you her entire attention. “When I shot Sam, I knew I should shoot him in the head, but I still shot him in the shoulder.”

“You were struggling. You were fighting him even before I intervened.” She says, leaning down to wipe away your tears and to kiss you softly. You cup her face and return her kiss.

“I could have used the rifle on Stev,e but I didn’t.” You tell her next and she nods, a proud smile on her lips. 

“I know.” 

“Do you think they’ll forgive me?” You ask her, and she kisses you again. 

“There wasn’t a moment when Steve thought that you were doing that on your own.” She tells you and then points to her head, you know she’s telling you the truth because she saw inside of his head. “Sam is slightly disappointed that he didn’t get to kick your ass but he didn’t doubt you either. Neither did Natasha.”

“And you?” You ask, your hand on her shoulder, keeping her close and revealing the weight of her body half on  top of yours even if you’re hurting, even if you can still feel Steve’s fists colliding with your ribs. 

“I believe in you.” She says, her lips close to yours. “I love you more than anything.”

You pull her closer and kiss her until you can’t take the pain on your nose, and she pulls back with a smile on her lips. You don’t know how you got this lucky, you don’t even know how she made her way into your life or how you made your way into hers. 

But God! You love her. 

“Thank you.” You tell her as you remember the things that she made you see when you were struggling. She showed you the first time she saw you, the first time she wanted to kiss you, your first kiss, images of you two watching a movie and grocery shopping, small things that pulled you right out of the nightmare you were living. 

“You continue to save me.” She frowns at hearing your words and you kiss the palm of her hand. “You came into my life and everything changed.”

“So did you.” She softly says and you smile.

“I love you more than anything too.” You tell her and she kisses you again. 

You’ll have to apologize to Steve and Sam, but for now you can just kiss your girlfriend and be grateful that you didn’t do anything that can’t be undone. 

Liho jumps on your bed soon after though, a clear sign that Natasha is already waiting for you and you have to follow him to the elevator.

….

[matrixbearer2024]

“Daddy dearest can't save you now squirt! You're mine!”

Aeschylus has nightmares about a familiar chaotic triangle we yeet around because LORE! I'm planning to make a comic about him waking up from the nightmare because holy SPAZZ he needs some good shit to recover and help with this.

More lore and context under the cut:

Way back when Aeschylus was a kid he used to adventure out of the shack and into the woods to explore and or bring back neat little critters to ask papa Sixer about(despite his mom having scolded them both about bringing random specimen of all kinds into the house). The behavior didn't really stop even after Ford got sucked into the portal, hell it happened more often because Max kept looking for his dad- convinced he just got lost on an expedition or something similar.

However, as you all know how Cipher messes with everyone's minds when granted the opportunity- the triangle tried to beeline for the kid that most resembled his darling Fordsy in both personality and behavior when the researcher finally grew wise to his shenanigans. He didn't really have many opportunities to for a couple years because of Stanley and Ford's wifey protectively hovering over the triplets but Bill would say waiting four earth years was well worth the return for the damage he had inflicted.

All it took was a little bit of stroking that same flame of curiosity as he did Sixer and Aeschylus was all his for the taking. Like father, like son, Bill couldn't have found it more amusing. Slowly he guided the kid deep into the forest, away from the eyes of mother mayhem and uncle irritating.

Much to the triangle's annoyance however, Aeschylus was more cautious of him than Ford ever was. The kid refused to make a deal with him and even tried running away at some point when he finally realised what the triangle was trying to do.

"Nu-uh! You're the weird guy that made my daddy crazy! My mommy says to never make a deal with you!"

Bill was pretty pissed at this point that his plans are being proper screwed with so he forced his hand.

"If you're not going to give me access to your head, I'll just take it then!"

Imagine having taken your eyes off your eldest toddler son for just a second only to find him suddenly gone. It took so much strength to even allow the kids outside of the cabin you called your home ever since Cipher started haunting you and the family since Ford's unfortunate incident with the portal. To find Aeschylus missing would've driven anyone at that point into a flurry of panic.

When Stan came out to check on the both of you, his expression of dread and anxiety merely mirrored your own to a lesser extent. The two of you immediately shouting for the kid as you checked the nearby area thoroughly, the both of you making your ways deeper into the forest surrounding the log cabin cautiously.

It was Stanley who found Aeschylus first, seeing the kid strung up high into the canopy was eerie enough but noticing he wasn't responsive made the panic shoot sky high. There was some kind of large furry creature that poked and swat around the young boy like a pinata which Stan immediately threw hands with the get rid of the darn thing in his emotional high.

You heard the screaming and shouting and rushed over before feeling sick to your stomach, there your kid was- but strung by the neck by a vine so high he seemed to nearly be a part of the forest canopy. You steeled yourself and pulled the small pistol from your pocket which your husband had made prior with the intention to use it for hunting creatures.

Who knew it's first use would be as a pivotal tool to save your son?

Despite shaky hands and eyes blurred with tears, your aim rang true and the ion blast burnt the vine clean a couple inches above the toddler's head. You didn't account for the tall drop however, as the priority was first and foremost to get him down before he was hung to death.

Thankfully, Stanley had been paying close attention as he managed to catch Aeschylus with a loud grunt. The kid was dropped on him like a bomb multiple times both literally and metaphorically but this moment falls under the former. Your stomach dropped to the floor when you also started to smell the familiar metallic tang of blood.

It wasn't rocket science for both you and Stanley to know that you needed to rush Aeschylus to the hospital, especially as the vine around his neck unwound to leave a large and nasty wound that seemed to circle around his entire neck. The vine itself was thorny and barbed but it had apparently dug deep enough into the kid's skin to cut.

Stanley drove to the hospital like a bat out of hell while you kept a towel firmly pressed into your son's neck in an attempt to stop the bleeding. The kid was breathing but shallowly, not to mention he was turning paler by the second.

You and Stan were never really religious, but you could both only really pray to whatever deity was up there if there even was any- to keep Aeschylus alive. You wondered how much your husband would've lost his shit had he been here, but you swallowed down the grief at the reminder of him as your in-law pulled into the ER parking lot.

Memories from that point on were a blur, you could only be grateful that despite the apparent tension between your husband and his twin brother- Stanley didn't just leave your family behind. He was expectedly dejected that he wasn't even told about the triplets getting born, much less his brother getting married, but he still stayed to care for you all in place of his brother. Not to replace him, but to do what he knew Poindexter would've and should've had he not been stuck wherever the portal threw him.

By the time you'd been able to see Aeschylus again, the doctors claim that it's a miracle the kid even survived. It's as if just enough pressure was put on his neck not to kill him but to make him suffer. He didn't pass out from oxygen deprivation, but from the pain.

You fell to your knees sobbing when you heard that, already knowing what or who was responsible rather because of their words. Aeschylus couldn't talk for a couple weeks due to this incident, and even afterwards his voice had changed due to the damage.

You regretted this moment every single day afterwards, all the more when your son even refused to step a foot outside anymore. He refused to explore the woods he once loved, the woods your family used to stroll by sunset or camp out in when Ford was still around.

Aeschylus started wearing high-collared shirts or turtlenecks to hide the scar as well, not telling anyone exactly why or how he got into that situation in the first place as everyone in the family already had an inkling or hunch. They didn't need to ask. He didn't want to be shifted to homeschool however, as much as you and Stan tried to convince him- since he seemed determined to study for whatever reason.

This event still gives Aeschylus nightmares until the present day, Bill Cipher didn't get into his head- but the triangle got damn well close and he would've had to pay his life if you or Stan hadn't found him.

Those same nightmares is why Aeschylus barely manages to sleep, having developed insomnia out of the fear and paranoia around the same time he was able to come home from the hospital. Even if you asked him now what was the scariest experience in his life, Aeschylus would likely mention this near death experience- as nothing else in his life has ever come quite close to this incident, not even weirdmaggedon.

Sketchy for this piece is here:

[tired-all-the-time22]

ヒアソビ - Camellia ft. Hatsune Miku

“In this one-night-only fantasia,

I’m scorching my fingers in the dissatisfaction”

^ Fic inspiration from this song, idea below v

+7/8/2023 update at the end

mistaken identity fic based on the knowledge that red son is unaware of MK’s monkie form. MK sneaks into a demon gala/formal event to crash any demon shenanigans (aka hang out with red son) any does so by using his monkie form. He finds red son, who, by some miracle, finds Mk completely unrecognizable and assumes that MK is a suitor or a kind of representative wanting to make ties with the demon bull family.

However red son, at this time harboring a crush for MK and possibly pining over him for a while, still recognizes enough features to see a resemblance to MK. Feeling as if he could never actually date MK himself, red son decides to try for second best and ends up flirting with what he believes to be a monkie demon Mk-lookalike. MK, while he does pick up that something is a little odd with the situation, shrugs it off and reciprocates red son’s flirting, ending up in them making mayhem and having cliche formal event-dancing-lights-shipping moments.

The night ends in MK feeling like their relationship has grown (possibly to something more, he hopes), and red son believing he’s fixed his ‘half-sided’ pining issue.

Imo this could be a funny fic like From Three Thirty to Four by Pittedpeaches (will always plug this fic bc it’s awesome and if you haven’t already read it go and do that now bc it’s hilarious) where MK and red son keep coincidentally only meeting like this when MK’s in monkie form and shenanigans ensue,

But alternatively I did originally imagine this as a kind of angst hurt/comfort fic where red son starts to feel dissatisfied with his ‘replacement’ and deals with feeling guilty about dating someone he feels is so similar to Mk while also remaining friends/enemies with him. They would eventually actually get together in the end, but I like hurt/comfort fics so making this art was fun. ^^

July 8th Update - I have decided to write a single chapter for this idea and here is the announcement post for more info - fic isn’t posted yet but if you guys want more when it is make sure to comment/reblog telling me so ^^

[steddieasitgoes]

@steddiemas Day 19 Prompt: Steddie as Parents

Tags: Established Relationship, Good Parent Steve Harrington, Good Parent Eddie Munson, Christmas Fluff, Elf on the Shelf, Eddie Munson Is A Menace, The Return Of Marley Harrington-Munson

wc: 1079 | Rating: G

Read on ao3 | ao3 collection

Steve and Eddie grew up thinking the highlight of being a parent around the holidays was getting to partake in any and all Santa traditions. To some extent it is, they both love taking Marley to see the big man, and watching her open the gifts they worked hard to secure is always a top ten moment of the year. But Santa isn’t the only highlight for kids anymore. Nowadays Elf on the Shelf is all the rage and they’re fully on board.

Maybe too on board if they’re being honest.

See, Steve and Eddie have very different approaches to the Elf on the Shelf madness that transpires in their house during the month of December.

After one too many heated arguments over what the Elf should do next, they found a compromise. Steve is in charge of Mango the Elf on even days, Eddie on odds, and neither one is allowed to criticize what the other chooses to do.

Not only does it preserve the Christmas magic for Marley, who nearly stumbled in on the two of them playing tug-o-war with the stupid Elf at two in the morning three years ago, but it also saves their marriage. Steve can’t think of many other things that would be more embarrassing than admitting to a marriage counselor that they’re there because of a damn Elf.

Like clockwork, Mango the Elf arrives on December 1st in a chaotic flurry that Eddie manages to one-up every year. Steve has no idea how he does it, but even he can’t help but marvel at the creative scenes Eddie manages to create — especially this year’s which saw Mango arrive by way of a hot air balloon.

It was a tough act to follow, but the two have made it clear that competition has no space in Mango’s antics. After all, it’s all about putting a smile on Marley’s face. How big that smile is shouldn’t matter.

(It definitely does.)

After scouring Pinterest for ideas and a quick call to Robin who thinks the entire Elf Shenanigans is a nightmare, Steve finds himself cutting 200 pieces of paper into snowflakes to transform their living room into a winter wonderland for Mango to play in.

And so it goes.

Eddie creates mayhem and messes — chocolate chips left in the sink because Mango used it as a toilet, toilet paper dropped over the chandelier, and worst of all, flour all over the kitchen after she engaged in a snow angel competition with Barbie.

Steve bites his tongue and focuses his energy on wholesome moments — a Christmas bow rock climbing wall, a slumber party with socks sleeping bags, and plenty of guests, and of course, Marley’s favorite: Mango’s trip to the Elf spa.

They keep each other on their toes, pushing each other to be more and more creative and Marley gets to wake up every morning to a new scene that brings a smile on her face and reminds them of the childlike wonder they were robbed of but are making up for now.

It’s a flawless plan, until disaster strikes.

“Have you seen Mango?”

“Mango?” Eddie yawns, shuffling into the kitchen. “We didn’t buy any Mangos. S’a summer fruit.”

“Not the fruit, the Elf. What did you do with her last night?”

Eddie yawns again, scratching his bare chest as he waits for the coffee to finish brewing. “I hid her like always. A good one too. You know the birdhouse in the yard? Well, it’s now Mango’s treehouse. Decorated it and everything.”

“You mean the birdhouse that is currently being swarmed by a couple of Blue Jays?” Steve asks, voice teetering in the space between calm and panic.

Abandoning the Kurig, Eddie slides across the floor and over to the window that overlooks the backyard. Sure as shit, a couple of Bluejays are going to town on the birdhouse and Mango judging by the red fabric gliding through the morning breeze.

“Oh shit! Mango!”

Steve and Eddie both sprint into the backyard. Steve works on scaring the birds off, while Eddie collects the mangled pieces that remain of Mango. A leg on the floor, an arm in the bushes across the yard. Her decapitated head lays beaten and bruised inside the birdhouse, eyes pecked out and nose completely missing. Tinsel litters the grass along with the careful construction paper decorations Eddie had spent hours making.

If he weren’t so panicked over what Marley is going to think when she wakes up, he’d be crying.

“What are we going to do!”

“It’s too late to get a replacement this year,” Steve says, shaking his head at the carnage in Eddie’s hands. “Maybe we… we write a note! Say Santa called Mango back early because Marley’s been so good and he needs extra hands on present duty?”

“That could work!” Eddie smiles, leaning over the tinsel-covered grass to kiss Steve. “Look at you, coming in clutch with a story. Told ya I’d make a storyteller out of you one day.”

Steve snorts. “Only took 15 years.”

“Better late than never.”

Steve shakes his hand before his eyes drift back over to Mango’s destroyed state. Letting out a sigh, he tips his head on Eddie’s shoulder. “Is it weird m’going to miss this thing?”

Eddie shakes his head, jostling Steve in the process. “It feels like a death. Maybe we should bury her.”

“And risk Marley digging her up in the summer?”

“You’re right. She doesn’t need that trauma,” Eddie chuckles. “Let’s have a moment of silence in her honor then.”

Steve doesn’t argue and they both duck their heads for a moment or two before a gust of wind picks up turning them into shivering messes. After hiding Mango’s form in the trash bin, they return to their warm kitchen.

“We are going to replace her though, right?” Eddie asks, finally sipping his coffee.

“Oh definitely. The minute they’re back in stock I’m buying two. One for next year and one for backup just in case your wild scenes turn disastrous again.”

“Smart thinking,” Eddie smiles. “Guess I should get started on that letter.”

Glancing at the clock, Steve nods. “Better hurry. Marley’ll be up any minute."

"Shit," Eddie says, scrambling to open their junk drawer full of pens and random scraps of paper. "Distract her for me?" 

"I'll try my best," Steve says, pressing a kiss to the top of Eddie's head before disappearing in the direction of Marley's room. 

[luxaofhesperides]

Ghostlights as college roommates and maybe some identity shenanigans thrown in would be so fun! Maybe dannys doing a little vigilante work on the side as well to up the secret identity mayhem

Danny would like to say his college career is going well. Gotham isn’t where he was expecting to pursue higher education, but the engineering scholarship he got through the Wayne Educational Foundation was just too good to turn down. It even covered the cost of an apartment! Although, the apartment is shared with another student who got a Wayne scholarship. 

Even with that, Danny lucked out and got a great roommate. Duke Thomas is chill, kind, respects Danny’s space and doesn’t throw wild parties or invite random people in at all hours of the day. He even joins Danny twice a week for study sessions!

Really, it would be the perfect college experience except for one thing: the ghosts.

Danny thought they’d stay in Amity Park. They had no reason to stray from the city where the portal was, and his parents are more than enough to keep most ghosts away. It took his friends, Jazz, and even Vlad to convince Danny that he wasn’t abandoning Amity Park and that the city wouldn’t fall while he took a few years to focus on himself. 

He worried right up until he got to GCU and walked the campus for the first time. Then he decided to enjoy the four years he had on the scholarship to get his degree and live his own life like a normal person.

To say he’s pissed about the ghosts is an understatement. 

The one thing he was looking forward to most is not being Phantom. Gotham is home to the Bats and they’re more than capable of handling everything in the city. It means there’s no need for him here and he can focus on school and enjoy going on invisible flights without worrying about being hunted down or having to fight a ghost. 

“Are you fucking kidding me,” he mutters under his breath as he feels the familiar chill race up his throat, A cold mist wafts out of his mouth, curling around his words, and Danny quickly ducks his head and hides it from sight. 

“Did you say something?” Duke asks, looking up from where he leans against the kitchen counter, squinting at a recipe on his phone. 

“Nah,” Danny lies. “Just stressing.” He gestures to the papers he has spread out on the dining table, then stands up. “I’m gonna take a walk. Maybe that’ll get my brain to work correctly tonight.”

“Got your phone on you?”

Danny reflexively drops a hand to his pocket, checking that his phone is where it’s supposed to be. It’s what Duke asks every single time Danny mentions going out, worried about Danny being unprepared for Gotham. It’s nice of him, though Danny does wish he can say that he’s survived a lot worse than a few muggers. 

“Got it.”

“Alright. I’ll try to work on dinner while you’re out.”

Danny nods and offers Duke a small wave before pulling his shoes on at the door. He grabs his keys and heads out, double checking that the door is locked behind him. 

Then he glances around the hallway, checking that the coast is clear, and pulls up the chill of awareness in his chest. Slowly, he breathes out, watching the blue mist waft out and lead towards the stairwell. 

“Wonder who it is this time,” he mutters to himself, going into the cold, concrete stairwell. It always feels a little off in there, as if he’s been removed from the rest of the world when the door closes behind him. His footsteps echo oddly in the space, so Danny chooses to fly instead, keeping his feet off the floor. 

A few flights down is when he sees her: pale and translucent, a faint blue glow around her. She’s a familiar face. Emilia is one of the first of Gotham’s ghosts he’s met, leading to the rather unpleasant realization that ghosts don’t only come from the Infinite Realms. There’s a strange sort of magic in the very foundations of Gotham that makes it the way it is, creating ghosts that are different enough from what he’s used to that it leaves him off balance. 

Gotham keeps her dead. Few get to pass on peacefully, and most have to wait until they grow weak and wither away, a second death, before they can be released from the living realm. The ghosts of Gotham are pale and weak, for the most part, and try to cling to him so grow stronger from his ectoplasm. 

Most want him to help them pass on, or give them a way into the Infinite Realms. Some want him to bring justice to their killers. Others want to kill him and take his ectoplasm for their own so they can continue their reign of terror in Gotham, unable to be stopped even in death. 

Emilia gives him warnings. It’s not always her, but she tends to be the one to draw him out of his apartment, pulling him into a vigilante lifestyle because he can’t bring himself to refuse anyone who asks for his help, and the dead in Gotham have no one else to ask.

“Danny,” she greets. “Nueve is out again. He’s going after the ghosts near Chantilly Street.”

“The sun isn’t even down yet,” Danny grumbles. Nueve, an old gang enforcer who died a few decades ago, cannibalizes other ghosts. It doesn’t destroy the other ghosts, not really, but it makes them feel pain when they shouldn’t be able to feel much at all. Taking their limited reserves of ectoplasm makes him momentarily stronger, and he uses that stolen strength to try to harm the living.

He’s been successful a few times. Danny makes sure to rip him apart as much as possible these days; he won’t be here forever, but he’s hoping that within his four years at GCU, he’ll be able to permanently stop Nueve.

Times like these, he misses having a Fenton Thermos with him. Though he’s not entirely sure it would work on Gotham’s ghosts with how different they are. 

Emilia follows him down the stairwell to the ground floor. Once there, Danny shoves his hand into the floor, taking out the backpack he’s hidden in it. He’s done this change of clothes so often he can do it in just a minute now, hiding his face and pulling on gloves beneath a large hoodie with old ectoplasm stains along the sleeves and hem. A gas mask is pulled on as well, covering the bottom half of his face, a necessary addition to his Ghost Work Outfit™ after he almost got caught in some Fear Gas during Scarecrow’s last attack. 

“Alright,” he says, “Lead the way.”

Emilia takes off through the wall and Danny hurries to follow, going invisible as he hits the streets. 

It’s still early evening, the sun not yet fully set. Plenty of people walk along the sidewalks and cars pass by endlessly, honking at each other as they try to go twenty above the speed limit. Danny does his best to avoid running into everyone, deftly dodging the reaching hands of a few ghosts who spot him as he sprints by. 

They only go a few blocks away from his apartment building, turning into a dead end alley where a group of teens (living, for once) are stuck with their backs to the wall, clinging to each other as they warily watch the man in front of them carelessly twirl a gun around his finger. 

The man makes a strange clicking noise in the back of his throat, and it takes Danny a moment to realize that he’s trying to talk. 

Still invisible, Danny sneaks around to stand in front of the teens, ready to bodily protect them. The man looks alive, and Danny see any ghosts around save for Emilia, standing at the mouth of the alley. There’s something strange about him; his movements seem just a little off, not quite as fluid as they should be. It’s not the movement of someone on drugs. It’s something that screams uncanny valley.

The gun’s handle drops solidly into the man’s palm. He makes another few clicks, then raising the gun to point at the teens.

“Bad idea, pal,” Danny says dropping his invisibility. The teens behind him startle, gasping and trying to press themselves further into the wall. 

The man’s eyes flash weakly and the pieces click into place in Danny’s mind. Nueve must have gotten strong enough to possess someone. That is… alarming, to say the least.

He rips the gun out of the man’s hand and tosses it aside. Then he pushes away the man’s arm when Nueve makes a clumsy attempt to punch him. With his chest left wide open and undefended, Danny takes the chance to shove his hand into the man’s chest, feeling for the familiar chill of a ghost. 

And then he wraps his fingers tight around it and pulls out Nueve, leaving the man to collapse. 

The teens behind him scream and Danny winces. 

Pulling out a faintly glowing human figure from someone’s physical body does not look good. It’s the best way to end a possession, but it does look alarmingly like he’s just ripped someone’s soul out of their body.

Keeping hold of Nueve’s ghost, Danny steps to the side. “You guys should go now. Take care.”

The teens don’t need any more prompting. They take off in a run, tripping over each other in their haste to get away.

Danny spares a glance to the man unconscious on the ground, but there’s nothing he can do with an angry ghost in his hands, so he has no choice but to leave him there as he flies up to a rooftop farther down the street. 

“How many times do we need to do this, Nueve?” he asks tiredly, shaking the ghost.

“These streets should be mine!” Nueve howls, trying to break free of Danny’s grasp. But he’s quickly growing weak, his energy fading, and Danny’s holding back his own ectoplasm as tightly as he can. “They may have killed me, but that doesn’t mean I can’t still take what I’m owed!”

“Dude, you’re dead. There’s nothing here for you. Move on.”

“You don’t get to speak on this, outsider. You think a freak like you has an say over us? You can’t stop us. You don’t even know what’s coming.”

Danny squints at him. “What, are you planning a heist or something? With your gang of dead people too weak to lift a piece of paper?”

“We’re not all dead. We’ve got living folk helping us and we’ll be taking you out first when we hit the streets.”

“Good luck with that,” Danny says flatly, “Begone with you.” 

Without giving Nueve a chance to say another word, he rips Nueve’s head off his body. His ghost wavers, then dissipates like smoke, fading away. 

Another side effect of whatever it is Gotham does to her dead: their ghost forms are remarkably fragile and it takes only a bit of strength to tear them to shreds, giving him some peace before they reform again. It won’t stop Nueve from striking out again, gathering enough strength until he’s able to possess some other unfortunate soul, but Danny’s bought himself some time to figure out what the hell was he talking about?

There are living folk involved with whatever he’s planning. It’s probably another gang, maybe someone with magic who is able to see ghosts? Which is not great. Danny doesn’t know much about magic; even when facing ghosts who used magic or magical artifacts, his go to method of dealing with them is to start throwing hands like there’s no tomorrow.

Well.

It’s a problem for later.

For now, Danny needs to get back to his apartment and work on his calculus homework. Hopefully he can finish it before he gets frustrated enough that he gives up and lies face down on the floor until Duke manhandles him onto the couch, where he’s less of a tripping hazard.

He’s just about to get back to street level when his Fenton Luck strikes again and he hears someone land on the roof, just a few feet behind him.

“Hey there, stranger,” the Signal says. “You know, we run into each other so often it feels rude not to introduce ourselves. Why don’t you go first?”

Danny turns to face the daylight vigilante, standing with his arms crossed as if that would make him look any more approachable. He’s been popping up wherever Danny’s out dealing with ghosts, which is very not great for Danny’s plans to have a peaceful, normal college life. 

Biting his tongue, Danny gives the Signal a quick two fingered salute, then goes intangible and drops down through the building. His invisibility sweeps over him and then he’s running through the streets, hoping it’s enough to keep the Signal from following him to his apartment.

He skids to a stop in the stairwell, dropping his intangibility just in time to crash into the wall. Panting, Danny waits for a tense minute to see if he’s been followed. 

When the door to the stairwell remains closed, he lets out a slow breath, then pulls off all the pieces of his Ghost Work Outfit, shoving it back into his bag. He takes a moment to fix his hair, messy from the hood, then shoves the bag back into the floor, safely hidden from curious eyes. 

Then he very casually walks up the stairs to the fifth floor and walks down the hallway to his apartment. His keys clang together when he opens the door, and Duke usually hears it when it does, but just in case, Danny calls out, “I’m back!”

He’s learned to announce himself after a few late night walks almost ended with him tackled to the floor when Duke thought someone was breaking in.

Duke doesn’t respond as he toes off his shoes. The stillness in the apartment feels off, as if the world is holding its breath. Cautiously, Danny walks in, trying to find his roommate.

He’s not in the kitchen. The living room is empty. Duke’s bedroom door is open and he’s not in there either. 

Something cold lodges itself in his chest. 

“Duke?” he tries again, looking over their apartment again for any sign of struggle, or something terrible happening, or even a mess that Duke needed more supplies to clean up. 

There’s nothing. The apartment is as it’s always been, just with an empty space where Duke should be.

Worried, Danny stands in the middle of the hallway, trying to figure out what he should do next. It’s because he’s standing so still, surrounded by silence, that he hears it: a light thud outside the window. 

Danny turns and he can swear he sees something large moving outside the window, disappearing from sight just as Danny takes a step into Duke’s room to check on it. He rushes to the window and pushes it open, looking down at the street, then side to side, and finally up to the last three floors of the building.

Nothing’s there.

Slowly, Danny pulls his head back inside, closing and locking the window. “Must be my imagination,” he says, trying to convince himself it’s not a big deal. 

He leaves Duke’s room and begins pacing down the hall, anxiety building steadily in him. 

His phones in his hand before he can think his actions through, Duke’s contact pulled up on the screen. He should call. He should make sure Duke is okay, but Danny hesitates. Is this something to be freaked out over? Would Duke thing he’s clingy and nervous and a bothersome roommate? He doesn’t want to risk Duke asking for a new roommate next year when the lease renews.

But he’s worried. It’s Gotham and Danny just dealt with a violent, murderous ghost threatening him. Duke can deal with a stressed out, worried Danny if it means he’s alive.

He hits the call button before he can talk himself out of it. It rings on and on and on until Danny starts to panic about having to find Duke’s ghost to avenge his murder. 

The front door is thrown open so suddenly and so loudly, Danny jumps and his phone clatters to the floor. 

“Danny! Hey!” Duke says with a bright smile, trying to catch his breath. He’s still holding onto the doorknob, slightly hunched over as he pants for breath. “I didn’t expect you back so soon.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah! Yeah, I’m totally fine.”

“Where were you?”

Duke straightens up and closes the door, kicking off his shoes. “Oh, just… out. Shopping. For dinner.”

Danny looks over his empty hands doubtfully. “No luck finding what you needed?”

“Nope!”

“What did you need? Maybe I can go to a different store and get it for you.”

“You don’t need to!” Duke says. “I just needed… tomatoes?”

Danny blinks at him. “We have tomatoes. Did you not know we had tomatoes in the fridge?”

“Oh, do we? Good to know.”

There’s something very weird about this conversation, but Danny doesn’t pry. Duke is weird sometimes, but it’s fine because he kindly ignores some of Danny’s oddities that come from being a halfa and a semi-retired hero. 

“Do you… maybe wanna sit down? Catch your breath? I can make dinner tonight if you want.”

Duke waves a hand in the air. “No, no, it’s fine. I got this. Anyways, how was your walk?”

He definitely shouldn’t talk about the cannibal ghost and his threats to take out Danny with his gang. “It was nice. Very quiet. You know, for Gotham.” He punctuates this with an awkward thumbs up and immediately regrets it, but it’s already done so he commits to it.

“Cool! Great. Just wondering, did you see anything weird?”

“Depends on what you’re asking about?”

“Just some guy wearing black with a hood covering his face. He’s been active in this neighborhood and I saw some people talk about him online. Apparently he just appears out of thin air.”

Danny tries not to wince. That’s him, alright. Gotham’s newest neighborhood menace. “I don’t think so, but there’s a lot of people in Gotham that were all black and walk around with their hood up.”

“True,” Duke concedes. “Well, just be careful when you go out, alright?”

“I always am.” He gives Duke the same two fingered salute he gave the Signal. Duke stares at him for a moment, eyes dark and almost dangerous, then he smiles and walks into the kitchen. 

“Wanna make dinner with me? I think we can figure out this recipe together. Unless you need to do your homework.”

“It can wait!” Danny hurries to join Duke, grateful for an excuse to push off calculus a little longer. He understands what he’s doing in the class, there’s just… so much work. He doesn’t even want to think about the tests. The tests make everyone cry.

“Alright, let’s get to it, then!”

“You’re in charge, chef,” Danny says, laughingly, and bumps against Duke’s side. He expects a light shove in return, something Sam and Tucker always did, but Duke goes tense instead, letting out a sharp breath that Danny is all too familiar with. “Wait, why are you hurt? What happened?!”

He goes to lift up Duke’s shirt to inspect his shirt, see the damage for himself, but Duke smoothly moves out of the way, grabbing Danny’s wrists and stopping him in his tracks. “I’m fine, Danny. I just got hit. Lightly. Minor bruising, really.”

Danny looks at him doubtfully, then wrenches a wrist free to lift up his shirt before he can move again.

Minor bruising is not how Danny would describe the blues and purples that decorate Duke’s entire side. He can see the outline of Duke’s ribs through the bruising. “How is this being lightly bruised? What hit you?”

“A car?”

“A car?!”

Duke winces, then pulls his shirt down. “I’m fine, Danny, really. It was just from a car that didn’t want to stop at a red light. I stopped another person from being hit, but the car got me pretty solidly. You know how bad Gotham drivers are.”

“Sit down!” Danny says, pulling Duke out of the kitchen. “I don’t understand how you’re still standing. I’ll get some ice, and I’ll handle dinner. You just stay there and stop pushing yourself for no reason.”

“Playing nurse for me now?”

“If I have to.”

“Would you wear a nurse costume for me, too?” Duke jokes.

Danny looks him dead in the eye and says, “If I have to. Would that make you follow my instructions? A tight little nurse dress?”

Duke sputters, cheeks darkening, and looks away. Danny grins, victorious, and darts back to the kitchen to grab an ice pack from the fridge. 

“Maybe I’ll wear one for you anyways, once you’re all healed up. Only if you’re good, though.”

“Danny, you’re killing me here.”

“Better me than a car.”

Duke laughs and takes the ice pack, pressing it against his side carefully. “Oh, for sure. Thanks, Danny.”

“Hey, what are roommates for?” Danny shares a warm smile with Duke, then pats his shoulder and heads back to the kitchen to start making a simple pasta dinner. 

Life in Gotham is weird and stressful and full of ghosts and heroes who won’t leave him alone. But it’s not all that bad, really. He’s happy with how he’s doing in college, and he’s beyond lucky to have Duke as a roommate. So long as Duke never finds out about his halfa status, then he’s sure they’ll be able to last all four years rooming together.

He just needs to keep a secret. 

Shouldn’t be too hard, right?

[tblsomedoodles]

Why the twins abandoned Draxum

Ok, i promised more Imaginary Friend content, and i am here to deliver!

this is a little more of the plot side of things rather than the shenanigans.

i'll put it under the cut since it's long. again.

Ok, so they sneak out to meet with Mikey and Raph for about three years before Draxum realizes what's going on. (or part of what's going on. He knows they have been sneaking out and the caretaker hasn't been doing his job properly, but he doesn't know they were sneakign out to meet, or even who they were meeting.)

Upon finding this out, the caretaker is fired and Draxum decides that, if they are competent enough to constantly leave the house on their own and come back fine, they are competent enough to be properly trained. This means they no longer have the opportunity to sneak out.

Mikey and Raph try to reach out to them via mind meld, but it's too far for a strong enough connection to communicate, not to mention the twins keep purposefully shutting them out. the twins figure that since they can no longer meet up with them, that It's better to cut themselves off completely now than continuing to long for a time, they believe, is gone.

It's two more years before they meet again, and it's on accident.

When Mayhem stole the emperium, Draxum sent the twins to fetch it, treating it as a test.

They're sent out to fetch the emperium, and, of course, run into Mikey and Raph (and April). It's very much a surprise, especially considering they're standing between them and their mission. They're careful not to hurt their siblings but do get Mayhem away Donnie sending Mikey a quick "do not follow us. it's dangerous" mind meld message before they nope on out through Leo's portal. a portal that both April and the soon-to-be imitation crab man go through before it closes.

They appear right in the middle of the lab so neither of the twins quite realize they have stowaways until it's too late. They recognize April as one of Mikey and Raph's friends and figure it's not a good idea for Draxum to realize she's there, so they hide her in a nearby closet before Draxum can notice, miming for her to stay quiet. once Draxum leaves again, Leo portals her back out of the building (he's aiming for topside but ends up just setting her down on their front porch for Mikey and Raph to find.)

Anyways! Mikey and Raph (and April) show up like canon, and, of course Draxum is seeing stars. It's the other two. He could have a full set once again! but they prove to be difficult to coerce into joining him, so he creates that vine monster to fight them (and test them while they're at it.) He sends Leo and Donnie after them as well, but they linger, choosing halfheartedly fight April rather than their brothers. That is, until Mikey ends up weaponless and the target of an attack that could hurt him.

Then the above happens. Donnie instinctively protects Mikey, which angers Draxum, which causes Leo to portal Donnie behind him so he's away from him, and, then they defect, choosing to get their brothers, April, and Mayhem out of the soon-to-explode lab rather than continue fighting.

but yeah, that's how they get away from Draxum. The power of little brother in peril lol.

(fun fact i'm just coming up with now (but have been thinking about) Draxum was super extra dramatic when he named the twins originally. He named them Thanatos and Somnus. though neither of them really acknowledge those names b/c they so rarely heard them growing up. Literally only Draxum used them. which is why when Mikey asked thier names, they just shrugged. Why is that Draxum beign extra, b/c those are the twin personifications of death and sleep respectively (though Somnus is technically the Roman name. but since Somnus's Greek name is Hypnos, i thought it would be too confusing.) also, according to Greek Mythology, Thanatos and Hypnos are the twin sons of Nyx (goddess of night) and Erebus (god of the dark). SO yes, Draxum was being dramatic AF and named a set of twins he was going to train to be ninja warriors, after the mythological twins born to night and darkness. and who also embody death and sleep. (this also gives me a good excuse to jokingly call the twins the Myth Twins, even though the aus staying named Mikey's imaginary Friends. lol))

[weirdmageddon]

I'm taking the plunge because why not:

What are some headcanons regarding small, silly things that happened during the 3 year trips on the Golden Yard and Meteor?

oh lets go i love this sort of ask. no meteor crew stuff sorry im kinda tired but

on the prospitian ship:

the crocodiles are never recovering from that shit bro. un-stonks

alchemizing sessions. probably with mundane household devices like toothbrushes or something. patterned toilet paper. davesprite absolutely remakes the sbahjifier for himself but i think he also likes to hand draw them from time to time. also john and jade alchemizing bathing suits and going swimming on lolar and hanging with the turtles. casey can come too. floaties on casey

the sbahj canon diverges. so many sbahj in-jokes exclusive to the prospitian ship. unfortunately the retcon make it so none of this ever happens :(

he’d never say it but davesprite likes it when john and jade fall asleep on him doing whatever, it makes his presence feel wanted and appreciated by the people he sacrificed his self and humanhood for good for. sorry for immediately going into davesprite but good god is he tragic. oh yeah heres more. he’s still part dave and shares the same history with john and jade that alpha timeline dave does. john gave him his shades on his 13th birthday in december 2008, he sent john the con air bunny and jade a physical copy of sbahj as furries in the mail. he is identical to alpha dave in relation to his friends before the timeline splits off. dont forget that 4/13/2009 was also his first time meeting his online friends john and jade in person, even after 4 months chronologically of sburb grinding—nearly a year with all the time shenanigans—and going back to day 1, since john and jade were dead in his timeline

tries not to cry cries anyway but only when he knows theyre asleep. pov when the weight of everything suddenly hits you (you are an emotionally repressed 14 year old)

also because he’s fucking fluffy and absolutely knows it and probably thinks to himself “yeah this is the best possible use for these otherwise pointless breast feathers” and yall already know he craves cloth mother plus probably has nesting instincts

(source)

adding on to that also i think people forget sprites are actually fucking LONG and his wingspan is fucking huge he could be a pillow and a blanket at the same time

i wrote davesprite jade cuddles and john thinking about mushrooms and davesprite thinking about how they contribute to the ecnonony

^ john toked too hard on the lowas mushrooms by accident one time

it feels like pajama parties would be a common occurence just the vibes im getting. literally jade is seen sitting on a pile of squiddles and theres plushies fucking everywhere you know they got up to plushie mayhem. do you think they ever alchemized them. look how lived in that room is they all contributed something

jade resumes gardening :) but theres no sun :( but she alchemizes some plastic plants :D but its not the same :(

canonically the imps in johns house just gave up tormenting him and started hanging out and having snacks on movie night

PENIS!

imagine looking up into the sky and seeing a giant casey the size of a planet sleep. jade resizes stuff for fun like this just to introduce some novelty to their lives

this is something

davesprite has beavis and butthead do america (1996) in his collection somewhere in his apartment on lohac

yall theyre watching johns fuckin spongebob dvd box collection. you KNOW john owns the spongebob squarepants movie (2004). and the best thing is it brings all of them together without any of them objecting. they all love spongebob

when the episode jellyfish jam comes on johns like “wow, pretty much this exact scenario happened to me with the imps.” (arthur flashback sfx)

DAVESPRITE: yeah well you didnt have a giant sound system did you

jade warps dave’s bro’s sound system from lohac and sizes it up. they put on stadium rave and the entire fucking house shakes

[icarusignite]

These Violent Delights (1)

Chapter 1: Marigolds and Mayhem

Pairing: Coriolanus Snow x OC

Word Count: 4k

Summary: Academic rivals, Coriolanus Snow and Artemis Highbottom must compete for the Plinth prize. Shenanigans ensue.

A/N: Check out the masterlist for a better synopsis lol. As usual, don't be a ghost reader. I live for yalls comments/questions/concerns/reactions, even a keyboard smash is highly appreciated and encouraged ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

Masterlist

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

It was the third nosebleed of the night and Artemis was just about tired of it. She didn't even bother stemming the flow, allowing the carmine rivulets to trace an unhurried path from her nostrils to the marble below.

The hush of running water met the heavy rhythm of a beating heart, and there she stood—a lone figure, framed by the harsh edges of the sink, her grip upon it almost desperate. She could feel the sharpness imprinting into her skin, and yet still she clung, her skin stretched across her knuckles almost comically grotesque.

She watched the blood, in an almost detached sort of way. It could be art, she mused, the juxtaposition of sanguine against sterile white. A whispered revelation danced at the edge of her consciousness—anything could be art if you framed it the right way. Even the bloodiest of carnages. A spectacle, a thing to be enjoyed.

Artemis looked up, and her reflection stared back, menacingly. The mirror, an unforgiving oracle, revealed a distorted visage, one she both did and did not recognize. Her dark hair, cascaded in disarray, entangled in the aftermath of sleep's elusivity and her eyes harbored shadows akin to a painter's bruised palette. The reflection mocked, a cruel mimicry of the composed persona she so ardently sought to maintain.

Out of control.

Unbidden judgment pierced through her thoughts, a verdict she loathed to acknowledge.

No that could not be right.

Artemis Highbottom was always in control.

She despised this discordance, this disruption to her meticulously curated world. To her, it was anathema, but nature could not be controlled, and what was more natural than blood? Perhaps it was fitting, that this fundamental of humanity could not be dominated.

Blood could never be dishonest, and it had the power to reveal one's innermost truths.

With unyielding determination, Artemis scrubbed at the remnants of the crimson tide that painted her face, an act of restitution against the chaos that dared to invade her pristine sanctuary. Each abrasive stroke was an attempt to erase not just the physical residue but a deeper discord. She worked quietly, although there was no one else to hear. There was never anyone to hear her, her gilded halls always vacant, but Artemis spoke silence like a second language and old habits die hard. She spared her father a brief thought, wondering where he could possibly be at such a late hour but it didn't really matter. He just wasn't here. He never was.

Raw skin met her touch, and the blood, now vanquished, left in its wake a battlefield—a canvas of sacrifice for the sake of semblance.

The mess was an unwelcome intrusion there were far worse ways to be awoken. If she was busy cleaning up after her nosebleeds, then she wasn't sleeping, and if she wasn't sleeping, then she wasn't dreaming.

The walk to the Academy's Heavensbee Hall was a brisk one, although, in the sweltering heat, Artemis found herself increasingly short-tempered. She was going to be late, but she kept her pace measured. She would not arrive a panting sweaty mess like some savage. It had been a foolish idea, she knew that, but she had given her own driver the day off anyway, waiting instead for her father. His presence was expected, and she imagined it would have been a pleasant change of routine to accompany him. He was probably running late, she told herself. After all, she hadn't seen him return, and she would know, she was awake half the night.

The grand staircase up to the Academy could hold the entire student body, so it easily accommodated the stream of officials, professors, and students headed for the reaping day festivities. Artemis sped up, taking three steps at a time, while still attempting a casual dignity. Every other person she passed stopped to wave her down and exchange pleasantries, and although her impatience was rising, she kept a placid smile stretched across her lips as she greeted them all in turn. She nodded when they asked after her, and then nodded some more, albeit less enthusiastically when they asked about her father.

She made her way through an entry draped in black banners, then sprinted down a vaulted passage, and into cavernous Heavensbee Hall, where they would watch the broadcast of the reaping ceremony. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that she wasn't quite as late as she believed, and the official ceremony hadn't yet started. The hall was humming with faculty and students and a number of Games officials. 

Avoxes wove through the crowd with trays of posca, a concoction of watery wine laced with honey and herbs. One passed by Artemis, and despite her parched throat, she waved him away. On principle, she avoided any and all intoxicants. It was stronger than most people thought, and in previous years she had seen many make complete fools of themselves by imbibing too deeply. Artemis would be damned if she allowed herself to lose control like that. That and given her father's dependence on morphling, she imagined she must be genetically predisposed to addiction. 

In the great hall, she was once again forced to make her rounds, as faculty and students alike beckoned to introduce her to their circles. She eventually travelled past the hundreds of cushioned chairs set up for the occasion and onto the dais, where the communications professor, Satyria Click was regaling a mix of Academy professors and Games officials with some wild story. Amongst the gathered crowd was the biology instructor, Alfred Stanton, who stood off to the side, eyes deliberately wandering the area as if to make a show of his boredom. When his eyes caught sight of Artemis, he brightened, his face lifting in a smile as he waved her over. 

Oh great, more greetings. If Artemis had to utter another false pleasantry, she'd lose her breakfast. 

No, she wouldn't. She knew better than that. Besides, she was Professor Stanton's teaching aide, and it was quite literally in her job description to be at his beck and call. 

When she arrived, she scowled internally. It was inevitable, she knew that, but she was hoping that at least today of all days, she'd be delayed in setting eyes upon the one person who held the power of ruining her mornings. 

"Oh, Coriolanus!" Satyria drawled, as the blonde boy gave her the customary kiss on the cheek. "Here’s my star pupil.”

Artemis held no qualms against Satyria, not really. She was amusing and not overly uptight, one of the few professors who allowed students to call them by their first names. It was her teaching aide against whom she held a grudge. 

Professor Stanton, not to be outdone, clapped his meaty hand on Artemis's shoulder, making her stagger. Maybe the man needed to lay off the weightlifting for a bit. He announced her presence to the circle enthusiastically, earning a scowl from Satyria. 

"And Artemis, my star pupil. We were afraid we'd miss you this morning."

Artemis ducked her head bashfully, mumbling something about running late, but Professor Stanton only laughed boisterously, as he continued to speak. 

Coriolanus Snow was seething. Well, no that was perhaps a little extreme. Artemis Highbottom did not deserve such a reaction from him. She didn't deserve the energy. When he hadn't seen her earlier today, he had deluded himself into thinking that she simply wouldn't come. She was never late after all, so the fact of the matter must be that she simply wasn't coming. With her gone, he could be the sole beneficiary of the crowd's attention, networking his way into their hearts. 

Then he had seen her arrive, panting and slightly out of breath and he had to admit he marveled at the sight. Her coffee skin flushed and her hair thrown over her shoulder haphazardly as if she'd been running. Coriolanus had been amused, to say the least. He had hoped that she wouldn't wander over to his little corner, that he would be able to have Satyria's circle all to himself, but it was wishful thinking. People knew of him of course, being the son of Crassus Snow and all, but he realized that they tended to forget about him in her presence. After all, it was far easier to garner the good graces of one's father if he was still alive. Even if said father was Casca High-as-a-Kite-Bottom. Snow sniggered at the nickname, a creation of his own genius. 

Almost as if she could read his mind, Artemis shot him a withering glare, and Coriolanus stiffened, standing straighter to shoot her one back. The circle had shifted, placing him right next to her and if he stretched his fingers, they'd brush against hers. Not that he'd want to of course. How utterly repulsive. 

“Beautiful shirt. Where did you get such a thing?” Satyria was addressing Snow now, surveying him carefully. 

He looked at the shirt as if surprised by its existence and gave the shrug of a young man of limitless options. They didn't have to know that all that was left to him was his name. The world still needed to think of Coriolanus as rich. 

“The Snows have deep closets,” he said airily. “I was trying for respectful yet celebratory.”

Artemis held back a snort. 

Celebratory, my ass. 

The Snows' closets were as deep as their pockets, which was to say, containing all the depth of a bottlecap. Standing this close to him, she could almost smell the faint scent of dead marigolds and potato starch his shirt was emitting. 

"Is something funny, Miss Highbottom?" Coriolanus turned to him with a raised eyebrow. 

Just your pathetic fibbing skills, she wanted to say. Perhaps she had not been as discreet with her expressions as she thought she'd been because he was still waiting for an answer. 

"Not at all, Mr. Snow," Artemis gave him one of her very best saccharine smiles. "I just agree with Satyria. That is indeed a lovely shirt."

Their professor beamed, happy to be validated.

“And so it is. What are these cunning buttons?” Satyria asked, fingering one of the cubes on his cuff. “Tesserae?” 

“Are they? Well, that explains why they remind me of the maid’s bathroom,” Coriolanus responded, drawing a chuckle from her friends. 

This was the impression he fought to sustain. A reminder that he was the rare person who had a maid’s bathroom — let alone one tiled with tesserae — tempered with a self-deprecating joke about his shirt. 

He nodded at Satyria. “Lovely gown. It’s new, isn’t it?” He could tell at a glance that it was the same dress she always wore to the reaping ceremony, refurbished with tufts of black feathers. But she had validated his shirt, and he needed to return the favour.

As he did so, his eyes couldn't help but return to the figure at his side. While Satyria's renovated dress made him feel better about his own attire, brought to life only through his cousin Tigris's efforts, Artemis's had the exact opposite effect. It was new, almost obscenely so. Wasteful extravagance, he thought to himself bitterly. What a vain and shallow creature, but such was the case with all the Capitol women he supposed. 

"What a wonderful ensemble, Artemis!" Satyria crowed once again. "You absolutely must give me the details of your dressmaker. Doesn't she look lovely, Coriolanus?"

Snow blinked. The question was directed at him, clearly, but he couldn't force the words out, even as his professor looked at him expectantly. 

“Elegant,” he finally stated blandly.

Liar. 

Artemis's eyes flashed at him triumphantly, almost as if calling him out. 

The adults wandered off, and their company was replaced by that of their classmates. Arachne Crane slipped her arm into Artemis's as soon she was within range, and Artemis sent her a smile that was only slightly less false than the one she had been wearing all morning. 

"Finally, and here I thought our star pupils would be too busy to give us humble folk time of day," she complained. 

"Don't ever use the word humble, Arachne," the boy to her right, Festus Creed, scoffed. "It does not suit you."

Arachne rolled her eyes and sipped her drink petulantly. 

"Have you tried this lamb, it's scandalous!"

The only thing scandalous is the president's son eating with his hands, Artemis thought to herself, but she knew better than to say it out loud. 

Lucky for her, Festus didn't. 

"Only the vulgar eat with their fingers, Felix," he chastised. "What, daddy not teach you table manners?"

"Maybe he would have if he wasn't so busy running the country!" Felix retorted. 

The conversation veered off in the direction of the Plinth Prize, and their eyes were drawn to the family standing off to a corner, speaking amongst themselves. 

"Who would have thought that you could buy yourself into the capitol?" Felix muttered derisively. 

"You can buy god himself, provided you have the resources," Artemis finally commented. 

"You can't buy class though. Did you see Sejanus's mother's outfit," Festus paused for dramatic effect before sniggering. "Sorry, his ma's."

At least he had a mother who cared for him, which is more than Artemis could say for the imbeciles around her exhibiting motherless behaviour. 

"Dress a turnip in a ballgown and it'll still beg to be mashed," Snow jeered. 

Artemis scoffed. And here was the biggest motherless moron of them all. 

"Interesting that you of all people should say that, Coriolanus," she eyed him carefully. Gone were the honorifics she had addressed him by earlier in front of the professors. This was a battlefield and there were no pleasantries in war. 

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

The two stared at each other, neither wanting to be the one to look away first and their classmates glanced between them uneasily. 

Eventually, Coriolanus blinked, his ears burning, and Artemis flashed him a grin. If he wasn't thinking about carving the smile from her face, he might have thought it suited her. 

If it was a battle of wills, Artemis was a born victor. 

Their conversation about Sejanus came to a halt when he approached them. He didn't bother greeting any of them but he smiled at Artemis, which she heartily returned. Arachne shot her a questioning glance, but if the Capitol was a hierarchy, Artemis outranked her, and therefore did not have to answer to her. 

Coriolanus eyed their interaction sullenly. He was a charmer, it was the only currency he had access to after all, and over the years he had made his best efforts to charm the Dean's enigmatic daughter. Perhaps he thought it'd make Dean Highbottom detest him a little less, if he had Artemis's favour, but although it appeared that she shared nothing else with her father, she shared in his disdain for Coriolanus. There was nothing he could do to endear himself to her, and he had long since stopped trying. 

It especially irritated him, that it was Sejanus of all people who had managed to make friends with her. He did not even need the networking opportunity it provided. Snow observed the brunette boy now, his soft charcoal gray suit that reeked of money. 

Sejanus’s father was a District 2 manufacturer who had sided with the president. He had made such a fortune off munitions that he’d been able to buy his family’s way into a life in the Capitol. The Plinths now enjoyed privileges that the oldest, most powerful families had earned over generations. It was unprecedented that Sejanus, a district-born boy, was a student at the Academy, but his father’s lavish donation had allowed for much of the school’s postwar reconstruction. A Capitol-born citizen would have expected a building to be renamed for them. Sejanus’s father had only requested an education for his son. 

For Coriolanus, the Plinths and their kind were a threat to all he held dear. The newly rich climbers in the Capitol were chipping away at the old order simply by virtue of their presence. It was particularly vexing because the bulk of the Snow family fortune had also been invested in munitions — but in District 13. Their sprawling complex, blocks and blocks of factories and research facilities, had been bombed to dust. District 13 had been nuked, and the entire area still emitted unlivable levels of radiation. The center of the Capitol’s military manufacturing had shifted to District 2 and fallen right into the Plinths’ laps. When news of District 13’s demise had reached the Capitol, Coriolanus’s grandmother had publicly brushed it off, saying it was fortunate that they had plenty of other assets. But they didn’t. 

Sejanus had arrived on the school playground ten years ago, a shy, sensitive boy cautiously surveying the other children with a pair of soulful brown eyes much too large for his strained face. When word had gotten out that he’d come from the districts, Coriolanus’s first impulse had been to join his classmates’ campaign to make the new kid’s life a living hell. He was glad he didn't because when Casca Highbottom's daughter befriended him, it put an end to all public acts of cruelty. They still mocked him in private, but that couldn't be helped. His district blood simply invited the scorn. Coriolanus's decision to simply ignore the boy had only reinforced his image. The other Capitol children took it to mean that baiting the district brat was beneath him, and Sejanus took it as decency. Neither take was quite accurate, but both worked in his favour. 

"Sejanus," Festus grimaced. "You made it to the reaping for once."

"And you made it to graduation Festus, we're both shocked," the brunette boy responded. 

"Spill it, who won the prize?" Arachne inquired. 

Sejanus scoffed. Like any of these rich Capitol children even needed it. 

"Oh no, I'm not going to ruin my father's big day. No one here actually likes him, but they all love his money. You know what that's like, don't you Arachne?"

Arachne scowled, leaning up to whisper in Artemis's ear about what a stuck-up thing he was. Artemis did not grace her with a response, but when the bell rang, and the students began to assemble in front of the dais, she took the opportunity to slip her arm out of Arachne's. Sejanus fell into step beside her then, taking the opportunity to slip a bottle of water into her hands. 

"And this is for?" she raised an eyebrow. 

"I know you can't stand the posca. Thought you might need something to drink, given all the talking they have you doing around here."

"And you thought I couldn't get myself some water?"

"I thought you shouldn't have to," he rubbed his neck ruefully. "Although I realize I might be a little late."

"I appreciate the gesture anyway. Thank you, Sejanus."

Artemis granted him her only real smile of the day. His sheepish smile reminded her of the day they first met, when this district boy with the cloddish accent first wandered up to her, offering her his bag of gumdrops.

She followed him to where a special section of chairs, six rows by four, had been set up for the mentors. To her chagrin, he took a seat to the right, leaving the only vacant seat next to one Coriolanus Snow. She felt the childish desire to kick his chair out from under him as he went to sit down, but shook away the traitorous thought. It was beneath her. 

When her father began to speak, Artemis suppressed a sigh of exasperation. Dean Casca Highbottom, the man credited with the creation of the Hunger Games, presented himself to the students with all the verve of a sleepwalker, dreamy-eyed and, as usual, doped up on morphling. Artemis zoned out as he went on his usual spiel of how the Hunger Games, his displeasure at the whole event evident in his tone, although perhaps that was just the drugs talking. 

"There has been a change this year. One final assignment to prove your worth, because the esteemed citizens of the Capitol have grown bored of the Games and simply aren't watching anymore. And if the Games are to continue at all, there must be an audience," he continued rambling. "Head Gamemaker Dr. Gaul has stepped in to incentivize patriotic values with her own unique flair. Starting with you. The Plinth Prize will no longer be determined by who has the best grades...but by who is the best mentor in the Hunger Games."

Nervous whispers fluttered among the students, as they exchanged uneasy glances. A subtle unease threaded its way through the crowd as they leaned in, both captivated and unsettled by the Dean's cryptic words. 

Artemis had been aware of this turn of events, and so did Sejanus, as it was his family's money involved, but she took great satisfaction at the dumbfounded expression on Coriolanus's face when he heard the news. It made the dourness of the entire situation as a whole much more bearable. 

"Your goal is to turn these children into spectacles, not survivors," Dean Highbottom announced. 

Artemis was right. Anything could be art. Anything could be turned into a spectacle, even the most depraved of carnages, and what greater carnage was there than the Hunger Games? 

Artemis did not need the Plinth Prize. She imagined her father would finance her higher education as he did all her other luxuries, but perhaps he might look at her differently if she won it. Perhaps it might gain his admiration. Perhaps he might respect her if she earned something of her own for once. Perhaps he might finally return home sometimes. 

She did not care much for the Games, in the sense that they held no significance for her, so far removed were they from her daily life. Her classmates were a varied spectrum on where they stood, ones like Sejanus speaking out firmly against the ritual, and others enjoyed the butchery, the slaughtering of district lives. Artemis simply did not care. They were irrelevant, but if it meant gaining her father's approval, Artemis would make herself care. 

As the large screens in front of them came to life with life footage from the reapings, Dean Highbottom began to recite the mentor assignments. 

"District One, boy, goes to . . .” he squinted at the paper, trying hard to focus. “Glasses,” he mumbled. “Forgot them.” Everyone stared at his glasses, already perched on his nose, and waited while his fingers found them. “Ah, here we go. Livia Cardew.” 

Livia’s pointed little face broke into a grin and she punched the air in victory, shouting “Yes!” in her shrill voice. She had always been prone to gloating. As if the plum assignment was solely a reflection on her, and not on her mother running the largest bank in the Capitol. Purely by chance, Artemis exchanged a cursory glance with Coriolanus just then, secretive like a private joke, which left her feeling quite unsettled. 

Coriolanus felt increasing desperation as Dean Highbottom stumbled through the list, assigning each district’s boy and girl a mentor. After ten years, a pattern had emerged. The better-fed, more Capitol-friendly districts of 1 and 2 produced more victors, with the fishing and farming tributes from 4 and 11 also being contenders. Coriolanus had hoped for either a 1 or a 2, but neither was assigned to him, which was made more insulting when Sejanus scored the District 2 boy, and Artemis the girl. 

Unlike Livia, Artemis received news of her good fortune with tact, pushing her sheet of raven hair over her shoulder as she studiously made note of her tribute in her binder. Their brief moment of camaraderie during Livia's outburst was forgotten as she shot him a smug smirk and he seethed. 

District 4 passed without mention of his name, and his last real chance for a victor — the District 11 boy — was assigned to Clemensia Dovecote, daughter of the energies secretary. Something was amiss when a Snow, who also happened to be one of the Academy’s high-honour students, had gone unrecognized. Coriolanus was beginning to think they had forgotten him — perhaps they were giving him some special position? — when, to his horror, he heard Dean Highbottom mumble, “And last but not least, District Twelve girl . . . she belongs to Coriolanus Snow.”

[ajalholland]

Family shenanigans

Sephiroth x reader + their sons Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz.

(ai generated picture.)

Sephiroth's eyes fluttered open, momentarily disoriented before he recalled where he was—in his comfortable armchair, surrounded by a few books. The ticking of the nearby clock served as a gentle reminder that hours had passed since he picked up the book about managing households. A faint line creased his brow in mild chagrin as he remembered he had been in the middle reading before he fell asleep...

The tranquility of his study was shattered by a loud crash. The sound traveled from the adjoining kitchen, causing Sephiroth to leap from his chair with a start, his heartbeat quickening. He dashed through the doorway, his eyes immediately seeking the wellbeing of his three young sons, Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz.

The three boys were all in the kitchen, surrounded by the aftermath of their latest destruction. Flour covered the floor, the counters, even up onto the walls. Pots and pans were scattered on the tile, and it seemed every piece of food (Y/n) had just purchased was now decorating the floor or walls. As Sephiroth walked into the kitchen, the boys all turned to look up at him guiltily, their little faces covered in flour and other unrecognizable substances.

Sephiroth's eyes widened in disbelief, his gaze sweeping the room and taking in the scene of culinary mayhem. He stood there in the doorway for a moment, his disbelief slowly morphing into stern disapproval. The boys fidgeted uncomfortably under his stare, their flour-covered faces looking like little flour-dusted trouble-makers.

Sephiroth was silent for a moment before he spoke, his voice deep and authoritative. "What…on earth have you boys been up to in here?"

Kadaj was the first to speak up, his hands on his hips in a defiant pose. "We were trying to make a pie," he said, trying to sound innocent. "But it all got messed up."

Yazoo was next, his calm demeanor hiding his guilt. "It wasn't our fault," he said. "The flour just... exploded."

Loz was the last to chime in, his eyes wide and watery as he looked up at his father. "We didn't do anything bad," he protested.

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced by their innocent attempts at deflection. He leaned against the door frame, crossing his arms. "Exploded, you say?" He asked. "And I suppose it just 'exploded' all over the walls and floors, too?"

He looked around the kitchen, taking in the extent of the mess. "Looks more like you boys were having a flour fight than baking a pie," he said dryly.

Kadaj puffed out his chest, refusing to admit any fault. "We weren't having a fight," he said stubbornly. "We were just making a pie... but then something else ruined the kitchen."

Yazoo nodded in agreement, a sly grin on his face. "Yeah, we were completely innocent," he said.

Loz just looked scared and kept his mouth shut, not wanting to add to the trouble they were already in.

Sephiroth chuckled, straightening up and looking at Yazoo with a raised eyebrow. "Completely innocent, huh? Well, let's go over the facts. Three young boys. A kitchen. Flour. Eggs."

He held up a hand, ticking off each point on his fingers. "A mess of flour on every surface. No pie in sight. And your faces covered in flour. Please, explain to me again how this was completely 'innocent'."

Yazoo shrugged, "Simple. We were baking a pie but then... a wild Chocobo appeared."

Kadaj chimed in, "Yeah! A wild Chocobo burst into the kitchen and started throwing flour everywhere."

Loz nodded in agreement, "It was a very big Chocobo." He added with completely serious look on his face.

Sephiroth tried to hold back a snort of laughter at the boys' absurd explanation, but he failed. He couldn't help it. The idea of a Chocobo raiding his kitchen and making a mess was so ridiculous that he found it hilarious.

But he quickly composed himself, trying to maintain his stern demeanor. "A Chocobo, you say?" He said, his tone dry with skepticism. "I see. And where is this Chocobo now?"

Kadaj crossed his arms and smirked, "It ran away." 

Yazoo nodded, "Yeah, it was very fast. By the time we realized what was happening, the Chocobo was gone."

Loz added, "It was a really, really fast Chocobo." He said as he glanced at Sephiroth with innocent puppy eyes.

Sephiroth struggled to keep from laughing again. The boys' story was ludicrous, but he couldn't help but be amused by their creativity and commitment to their lie.

He cleared his throat and fixed the boys with a stern glare. "Well, boys," he said, "if a Chocobo truly was the culprit here, then I'd love to know how he managed to cover you all in flour too." He looked at Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz, their clothes dusted with white powder.

Kadaj looked down at his clothes then tried to brush some of the flour off, but it only seemed to make it worse. "Um... the Chocobo was very... messy..." he said with a small voice.

Yazoo tried to look innocent, "Yeah... the Chocobo had a very... powerful sneeze..."

Loz remained quiet, looking down at his feet and avoiding eye contact with Sephiroth.

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow, suppressing another chuckle. The boys' attempts to cover up their mischief were amusing, but he knew the truth. He decided to play along for a moment longer.

He crossed his arms and nodded sagely. "A very...messy, very...sneezy Chocobo, hmm? That makes perfect sense. But tell me, where did this mischievous Chocobo come from? I don't recall seeing any Chocobos around."

Kadaj shrugged, "I don't know. It just appeared." 

Yazoo added, "It must have... magic powers...?" He said with a hesitant tone, not confident that his reasoning would work.

Loz quietly mumbled, "It... came out of the... closet..."

At that Kadaj and Yazoo smacked their heads with a mix of embarrassment and disappointment.

Sephiroth's lips twitched in a smirk at the mention of a magical Chocobo, but the statement about a Chocobo coming out of the closet nearly made him burst out laughing. He quickly cleared his throat, covering it with a cough, and then looked at the boys with mock seriousness.

"A magic Chocobo that randomly appears and can come out of closets, hmm? Sounds quite...dangerous." He paused, letting the boys squirm for a moment under his gaze. "I better tell your mother about this."

All three boys let out a collective gasp of fear and panic. "No! Don't tell mom!" Kadaj protested. 

Yazoo nodded in agreement, "Yeah! Don't tell mom!"

"Please... don't tell..." Loz whimpered.

All three boys looked at Sephiroth with pleading eyes, desperate to keep their shenanigans a secret.

Sephiroth feigned a frown, but inside, he was amused. The boys' fear of their mother's wrath was all too familiar. He crossed his arms again, making a show of mulling over the situation. "Hmm, I don't know... Your mother will not be happy when she sees what you've done to her kitchen. Not to mention her poor groceries..." He paused, looking at the boys with mock concern. "I can't promise you I can save you from her."

Kadaj and Yazoo exchanged panicked looks, their faces turning pale at the thought of their mother's reaction. They knew she would not be happy about the disaster they had caused in the kitchen. Loz looked like he was already on the verge of tears, knowing that their mother would be furious. All three boys turned their pleading eyes back to Sephiroth, silently begging him to not tell their mother.

Sephiroth looked away, pretending to contemplate his decision as he kept a straight face. He could see the boys' desperation and fear, which amused him, but he also didn't want to get on (Y/n)'s bad side either. He was in for it if she found out he fallen asleep instead of watching their sons.

He sighed heavily, as if reluctant to make this decision. "Alright... I won't tell her. But on one condition."

The boys' faces immediately brightened with relief. They were so eager to accept Sephiroth's condition, they would have agreed to almost anything to avoid their mother's wrath.

"Anything, anything!" Kadaj said hurriedly.

Yazoo quickly agreed. "Yeah, we'll do anything!" 

Loz just nodded vigorously, his relief evident in his expression.

Sephiroth chuckled to himself, enjoying the power he held over the boys. He considered teasing them for a little longer but ultimately decided against it.

"Very well," he said after a moment, trying to maintain a serious tone. "Here's the condition: you boys have to clean up this mess yourselves. Every bit of it. No skipping or half-assing it. I want this kitchen sparkling clean before your mother gets home."

Kadaj and Yazoo both groaned at the thought of having to clean up the mess they'd made. It seemed like a monumental task, given how thoroughly they'd trashed the kitchen. But the thought of their mother's reaction if they didn't comply was even more daunting.

Loz, on the other hand, was focused on something entirely different. He tugged on Sephiroth's pant leg. "Daddy... you said a bad word...," he whispered, his eyes wide and innocent.

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow, suddenly caught off guard by Loz's observation. He hadn't meant to let a curse word slip in front of his sons, but in the heat of the moment, he had forgotten his language.

He knelt down so he was eye-level with Loz and patted his head gently. "You're absolutely right, Loz. I did say a bad word, and I'm sorry for that. It's not a good habit, is it?"

Loz shook his head, his big eyes still wide as he looked up at Sephiroth. He may have been young, but he had a good sense of right and wrong. "No, it's not a good habit," he said quietly. "Mommy would beat you up if she knew."

Meanwhile, Kadaj and Yazoo were already starting the task of cleaning up the mess, albeit reluctantly. "This is gonna take forever," Kadaj mumbled as he started moving the larger pots and pans. "We should have just actually made a pie..."

Sephiroth smirked, amused by Loz's comment. It was true, (Y/n) would have his hide if she knew he had cursed in front of their sons.

He turned his gaze back to Kadaj and Yazoo, watching as they began the daunting task of cleaning up. "You should have," he agreed amusedly. "But instead, you decided to cover the kitchen in flour and make it look like a Chocobo exploded in here."

Kadaj huffed. "It's not our fault!" he protested. "Things just escalated... quickly."

Yazoo nodded in agreement, but then mumbled under bis breath, "And it was mostly Kadaj's fault anyway..."

Kadaj heard Yazoo's comment and shot him a glare. "Hey! I didn't do it all! You helped too, you know!"

Sephiroth chuckled at the boys' banter. Their attempts to blame each other were humorous, especially when they'd been caught red-handed.

He crossed his arms and looked from Kadaj to Yazoo and back. "Yes, I'm sure it was a team effort," he said, barely hiding his amusement. "But from what I could tell, you're both equally responsible for this... catastrophe."

He paused for a moment, adding, "And remember, I want this kitchen spotless by the time your mother gets home. So, get to it. Loz, that includes you."

Kadaj and Yazoo both groaned in response to Sephiroth's reminder, but they knew there was no escaping the situation. Loz, on the other hand, was already diligently rolling up his sleeves, determination in his little eyes. "I'm gonna help!" he exclaimed, determined to do his part.

With that, the boys set to work cleaning up the kitchen, making quite the scene as they stumbled over each other's feet and continued to banter back and forth.

Sephiroth watched as the boys started working. He stood to the side, keeping an eye on them and offering some occasional guidance when needed. But mostly, he just observed, finding their childish antics and arguments about who's fault it was amusing.As the boys worked, Sephiroth couldn't help but smile. Despite the mess they'd made, seeing his sons together like this warmed his heart. He leaned against the doorframe, crossing his arms again, and silently enjoyed the view of his sons learning a valuable lesson about responsibility and consequences.

The kitchen cleanup was a chaotic scene. Pots and pans clanged together as the boys tried to get them into the sink for washing. Kadaj and Yazoo bickered over minor things, arguing about the best way to clean the flour from the countertops. Loz, on the other hand, seemed to be making more of a mess than anything else as he attempted to help.

Sephiroth watched with an amused expression as the boys continued with their chaotic cleaning efforts. The clanging pots and pans, the constant bickering, and Loz's less-than-helpful attempts at cleaning, all brought a small smile to his face. Eventually, he pushed himself off the doorframe and approached the boys. "Alright, enough bickering. You're supposed to be cleaning, not arguing." He began to help.

Kadaj and Yazoo both grumbled, but they obediently stopped their bickering and returned to cleaning.

Loz noticed Sephiroth joining them and grinned widely, "Daddy's helping us!" he exclaimed cheerfully.

Kadaj rolled his eyes and muttered, "Finally, someone who knows how to do this properly."

Sephiroth chuckled at Loz's comment and smirked at Kadaj's remark. "Oh, I'm sure you were doing a fine job," he said dryly. "But I thought I'd lend a hand to speed things up a bit.. and save us all from your mother.."

He grabbed a cleaning rag and started wiping down the countertops, cleaning up the spots where Loz had made a mess. "You know, if you three had used this energy to bake an actual pie instead of creating a disaster area, we'd probably have dessert by now."

Suddenly Sephiroth tensed as the sound of the front door echoed through the house. He recognized the sound and knew it could only mean one thing: (Y/n) was home.

He glanced at the boys, who had frozen beside him, their eyes wide and panicked. Everyone fell silent, waiting to see what would happen next.

(Y/n)'s voice called out from the entryway, "I'm home!" followed by the sound of her footsteps as she entered the house.

The boys exchanged terrified looks, their hands shaking in silent panic.

A moment later, (Y/n) appeared in the kitchen door and stopped, her eyes widening as she took in the scene before her. Her eyes darted from the messy kitchen to Sephiroth and then the boys.

"BOYS!!!"