#sobbing of course

[lorastyrels]

Yin & Yang ☯️

[loves2spwge]

they just want to be one...

commissions @jolyonvane did for me where i asked if he could please please please make stan look as desperate and exhausted as he usually does but is being kept together by all his love for his sbf kyle

[witchofthemidlands]

Me watching Midnight for the first time aged 8:

Me watching Wild Blue Yonder for the first time aged 24:

[buried-in-autumn-leaves]

do you ever just

and then

[saintobio]

sy13 | sneak peek. a long one, kinda :)))

You could see the torment in his eyes as he looked at Sachiro, the helplessness of a father who could do nothing but watch. You just couldn’t bear the silence any longer, so you finally spoke. “Satoru… just go home.”

He froze at the sound of your voice, as if caught off guard, but quickly shook his head and wrapped your belly under a warm blanket. “Did I wake you up?”

“I can look after Sachi by myself,” you urged, disregarding his question. “You need to rest.”

But again, he refused. “No.”

“But—”

You opened your mouth to speak again, to reason with him, but before you could, Satoru’s voice cut through the air, breaking in a way you had never heard before. “Y/N, let me be a father to my kids… Please.” His voice cracked, the raw emotion spilling out as he looked at the ceiling with somber, tearful eyes. It was the heartbreak in his voice that made you realize that you were the only family Satoru had left. And it was the tremor in his hands that made you see through the trauma he had developed after he was led to believe for three years that his son had never existed. In a way, you felt responsible for the pain you had caused him, too. “Just please let me love you and our babies. Don’t take them away from me.”

For a moment, silence became your friend. Yet, the quiet that enveloped the room was more of a tender moment suspended in time as you let Satoru embrace you in his arms. You both remained there, connected by the warmth of his hand over yours, and the gentle rise and fall of his breath. He caressed your belly as if you were going to take his baby away—that if he closed his eyes, even for a second, he would wake up to see his unborn child gone. 

But then, a soft knock on the door shattered the stillness. Satoru’s grip on your hand loosened as the nurse poked her head into the room with an apologetic expression on display.

“I’m so sorry to interrupt, Mr. and Mrs. Gojou,” she began, her voice quiet and gentle, “but you have a visitor.” Satoru’s brows furrowed slightly, but before he could ask, the nurse continued, “Her name is Akemi.”

At the mention of her name, he immediately sat up, his body tense as he instinctively prepared to stand. You felt the shift in his demeanor, the way his hand slipped from yours as he moved to the edge of the bed. You stayed still for a minute, processing the sudden change, and your heart sinking at the thought of yet another intrusion by her.

You took a deep breath as you began to pull away, already bracing yourself for what was to come, and for the inevitable exit he would make. Like always. Choosing another woman over you. Choosing another woman over his own child. Of course, that’s what he’s about to do, right? You started to gather the strength to let him go, to retreat back into your thoughts, until the nurse spoke again.

“Actually,” she said, her eyes flicking between you both, “Miss Akemi wants to see you, Miss Y/N… not Mr. Gojou.”

[lyss-butterscotch]

Hiiiii @ressioo if you keep using my system failure AU to hurt my babies then I'll use your AU to hurt your babies ^-^

[esmeraldablazingsky]

unwell about neuvifuri again because for 400 years furina has encouraged neuvillette to open up to humanity, to make friends, to communicate and love and take time to enjoy himself, and over time neuvillette must have realized that furina never really did any of those things for herself, as hedonistic as she might’ve seemed on the surface

throughout the entire archon quest neuvillette is increasingly confused and distressed by furina’s refusal to communicate or confide in him… he notes that there’s something she feels she can’t trust him with after the arlecchino incident, and after their argument in his office he admits that he just doesn’t understand why she won’t communicate when that is the foundation of a healthy relationship (I will bet money that furina is the one who taught him that in the first place!)

he’s clear with her, she knows everything about him, but it slowly becomes evident that she doesn’t trust him in the same way and it must just eat neuvillette up inside that his closest confidant, the one who showed him how to form relationships and open up to people, can’t do the same with him

[hercynianforest]

Just a friendly reminder that Aaravos is not a trustworthy narrator, lol

Bonus:

Me:

[jasperscringepit]

I loved you like the sun.

Hello tumblr!! I’m not dead, surprise! I’ve been busy with uni, and my mental health took a swift nosedive at the start of term. I’m still struggling to be honest, but I had no uni work for this weekend so I had time for indulgent newsies fanart so yippee!! I was also avoiding tumblr to prevent both bbc ghosts and ofmd season 2 spoilers, but I’m caught up on both now and am going slightly insane about both. Hopefully I’ll be a little more active from now on, but I’m still having to be gentle with myself.

[honeycollectswhump]

more on grief. the symptoms.

the feeling overwhelming you at random times of the day, without warning. suddenly you are stuck crying and gasping for breath.

your stomach cramps every time you think about them. it makes you want to vomit. nothing really helps and it can kill your appetite.

you are constantly tired, no amount of sleep seems to be enough. you could sleep for a thousand years and maybe you wish you could.

no matter what you are doing and how happy you are, they are always on your mind. you ruminate and ruminate if there was anything you could have done differently. you think about all the things you should have done.

grief alienates and isolates you. it feels like people can’t understand, there is no right words to calm you down.

you will hate yourself for this but sometimes you feel so powerless you wish you would have never been put in this situation. even if that means never knowing that person. you don’t really mean it though you are just desperate.

you can grieve people that are still alive

your grief can project in other things and situations. your mood can drop quickly. you can overreact or be aggressive and abrasive. this alienates you further

people will tell you to distance yourself. you cannot.

feel free to torment your blorbos with this

[hella1975]

listening to a song very distinctly attached to a very bad period of your life and immediately having the mental equivalent of 10,000,000 lightning bolts hitting you at once

[kaurwreck]

Kunikida and Bram work not because they both love Aya or are in any position to raise her, but because Kunikida's romanticism, possessiveness, obsessiveness, and crippling sensitivity belied by his blunt exterior make him exceedingly well suited for a Gothic romance.

[arthursfuckinghat]

You know, whenever I see the discussions around Jack Marston possibly getting drafted in world war one, I can't help but physically ache at the thought of it.

Jack Marston, born into a gang that honoured freedom above everything, forced to sacrifice everything he has left for war.

Jack Marston, a boy who read about knights and soldiers, now forced to become one in another fight he never asked for.

Jack Marston, raised to be away from a life of violence, but now the world has found a way to drag him back in.

No matter what happens, Jack would have to face a really tragic dilemma. Does he go to war and sacrifice the legacy of freedom he was raised with? The life his family died for? Or refuse and be labeled a criminal, putting his parents to shame and repeating the same cycle his father went through?

It just tragically mirrors the struggle he’s always had - trying to find his own identity outside the legacy of John Marston, and the violence that came with it. But he's being pulled back in, no matter what he chooses.

He was never made for the violence that shaped his parents' life.

[girl-drink-drunk]

it used to be bruce campbell would show up in things to be slutty and an idiot. back when the world made sense

[iridescentpull]

Actually, I'm gonna ramble about Pac and Ramón for a bit:

Pac knows how it feels to be abandoned– after all, he was abandoned in the orphanage after his parents' divorce. He knows the trauma of waiting for that person to come back, but ultimately never coming back, and feeling like maybe it was his fault for that, and the need to prove you deserve to be loved.

They both had to grow up quickly, albeit for different yet similar reasons. Pac had to grow up quickly because he had to take care and protect his best friend, Mike, and at the same time fight for their survival after the orphanage shut down. Ramón had to grow up because his other father, Spreen, didn't like how childish he was (the moment with the boucy ball comes to mind**) and then he lost his 1st life, which meant he had to be extra careful.

They both also only have had one other person for most of their lives, someone they can trust 100%. It has always been Fit and Ramón & Pac and Mike for the longest time. Of course, other people have come and gone, but in the end, it has always been the two of them.

I think the reason Pac is so affectionate and caring of Ramón is because he knows, he understands him. He wants Ramón to get to experience all the things he couldn’t. Have a big adoption party? Yes, of course. Have two lovable parents who cherish him? Done and dusted. Have domestic and relaxing activities with close family? That can be be arranged, just say a day.

All in all, I think them being in each others lives heals them respectively. Pac being able to love and take care of Ramón helps him heal his inner child. Ramón being able to get the second parent he always wanted (while also making sure Fit is not alone) helps him get to feel like a silly kid once again.

I think that's beautiful.

(** If you dont know, Ramón once had a slime ball he used to play catch with. One time, he gave the ball to Spreen in hopes of playing with him, but Spreen scolded him for being childish and that he had to grow up. After that, I don’t think I’ve ever seen Ramón with the ball again [i could be wrong, though!])

[archiveofliterature]

that one line about ramy's bangla being rudimentary made me absolutely sob (i'm bengali) and i wanna talk about why

there's so much to it both contextually with ramy's character as well as historically. contextually because ramy is fluent in 6 languages, an insane number of languages for one person but none of which are his mother tongue. he's described as a performer, one who knows he can't blend in so instead he stands out as a means to escape as much of the racism as he can. he gets lost in it that he almost forgets who he is; this is reflected in his language ability too – he gets so lost in his linguistic academics he just barely remembers the native language of his home place that he adores.

and honestly, you can't even really blame ramy for it at all when it was induced. it's the british who saw urdu, arabic and persian as more valuable than bangla, it's the british that make ramy put on this act so he can literally stay alive. and when you know the historical relevancies between urdu and bangla, it hurts so much that ramy was forced to forget bangla

very brief history context: after the partition, where british india was split into india, pakistan and east pakistan (now bangladesh) bangla was seen as inferior to urdu due to its hindu connections. bengalis experienced so much shit because of this (and bengali muslims are still dealing with the internalised cultural racism today honestly). pakistanis tried to make the official language urdu, even though literally everyone in east pakistan were bengali and spoke bangla, so bengalis fought back against it. we still celebrate that day today (feb 21)

so to have ramy be in this position in the 1830s where urdu was seen as superior to bangla, especially when ramy is a bengali muslim, is just extremely accurate?? and maybe it's bc we don't have much western literature where we talk about this but it's just so nice to have it acknowledged

the bangla language movement didn't happen until around the 1950s, over a century after babel's timeline, but the seeds are always there. while i do think it comes with both this islamic superiority tendency a lot of asians have (arabs i'm looking at you) and britian's imperialistic racism, i just love how it all makes sense