#someone this is like the black market episode all over again like in what fucking world is he fucking qualified for this role except for be

[gayspock]

"someone who knows the difference between right or wrong, hence lee" is this the same lee who cheated on his wife, gaslit his wife, and also ordered (?) his wife to go risk her life and save his fucking sidepiece (during which the person she was with got shot + killedbtw) or is this a different lee ?

[weebsinstash]

Now that I saw that doodle Vox made again, I'm just wondering how tf he knew Alastor has hooves

Also noticed that he was a lil fixated on Al's ass in that same doodle so there's that :>

I literally searched the Hazbin wiki for the source and couldn't find it but I've seen multiple people posting some screenshot of some website that says, Velvette previously stated Vox had an Alastor body pillow, and I don't know if that's an old Voxtagram post or more recent but it's been living in my head rent free ever since

Like there have been so many Viv streams and q&a's that have mildly spoiled things or mentioned facts that have since become non canon so I'm not sure what to listen to anymore but dude, reading the wiki of all the amalgamated facts is A TRIP. Vox is Actually Totally Correct: despite Alastor having his gentlemanly persona and some weird "serial killer moral code, like dexter", he canonically has awful oral hygiene and both Vivzie and... Fautisse? Have mentioned this. His demon form has black gums. Vivzie said he "probably doesn't prioritize oral hygiene" and also probably wasn't a cannibal in life so that's literally a new hobby he picked up in death so also um. THE SECOND THIS MAN HAD FREE REIGN AND THERE WAS NO RULE OF LAW OR CONSEQUENCES HE DECIDED TO START EATING PEOPLE SO LET THAT SINK IN.

You start reading Alastor's wiki page and it makes it pretty clear he's like DERANGED, hypocritical, he's like borderline a megalomaniac? It's all hidden behind this, persona, this wall he puts up, his well put together demeanor that allegedly never cracks, but underneath his showmanship he's a haughty, insecure, judgy, gossipy, genuine FREAK who responds with insults and violence whenever he can who relishes in trolling people and scaring them, literally enjoys knowing when he's making people uncomfortable

I have so many conflicting feelings but like PRETTY SURE HIS VERSE IN THE FINALE WAS A VILLAIN SONG, HE'S LITERALLY SINGING ABOUT BEING PISSED AND WANTING TO RETALIATE BECAUSE HE'S BEING FORCED TO DO STUFF HE DOESN'T WANT TO

THUS

I AM CONVINCED VOX IS JUST A BOTTOM AND A SLUT WHO THINKS ALASTOR IS JUST REALLY COOL AND HAS A ONE SIDED PATHETIC BOY CRUSH

Bro the sound I fucking made when his wiki trivia says he's been described as "painfully white, like phlegm in the back of your throat white" NO DONT DO MY TV MAN LIKE THIS 😭🤣

Anyways, you've probably seen the posts but for someone who claims to be so hip and modern, Vox goes out of his way to dress similarly to Alastor. The coat with lapels in the front and a tail in the back, a bow tie with a cravat, cuffed sleeves, intentionally or not the color contrast of Vox's hands resembles Alastor's and Vox CAN customize his body...

He's just. I just completely forget sometimes that Alastor literally called him OLD PAL in episode 3 and yes he was obviously saying it to talk down to him but like ALASTOR DID ACKNOWLEDGE HISTORY BETWEEN THEM, and also oh wait what's this, Vivzie has confirmed Vox and the Vees are major antagonists of Season 2 and that Vox and Alastor's history is going to be expanded upon so.... radiostatic shippers stay winning ha ha

I read a post that I meant to reblog that was something like "Vox is actually an incredibly cunning charismatic manipulative businessman who is a legitimate threat and we see this for all of 5 minutes and the second Alastor is mentioned he starts completely coming apart" and it's SO TRUE, he can be ur angel or ur devil. He's a legitimately OP threat and he's also A PATHETIC SAD FAILHUSBAND. Give me Vox who's efficiently marketing more hypnosis equipment to substantially grow his own wealth and manipulating his shareholders and then he's going back to his computer room with some popcorn and kicking his little feeties as he watches his darling and Alastor on like 30 different monitors. Give me Vox who can know the INSTANT someone is trying to go behind his back and double cross him because he has mass surveillance all over the city and he's using his endless resources to develop high end 3d printers to make posable figures of his crush and Alastor.

Give me Vox who loses his cool and insults you to your face and you two get into a huge argument and maybe Velvette and Valentino lash out at you in defense of him and he's going to his room and crying from frustration into his body pillows totally not plural, totally not ones of you and Alastor and calling himself a stupid idiot because he hurt your feelings and then spends the next like week SUFFOCATINGLY showing up almost every single place you are and embarrassing himself as he tries to bond with you and prove to you what CLEARLY AWESOME boyfriend material he is

[bella-rose29]

episode 4 commentary - Sweet Dreams

warnings: swearing, once again barely any of this is proper commentary it's just me calling everyone pretty and simping over their hands and arms, SPOILERS FOR THE SHOW AND BOOKS, when I have multiple of the same letter in a row (so like AAAAA) I have to press the key every single time (fun) so... idk why it's a warning but I felt like you just needed to know how excited I got

that's a funky headboard

omg I want her jumper

LOCKWOOD WITH THE ALICE IN WONDERLAND REFERENCE

that toast would have scared the shit out of me too Lucy dw

angry

concerned bbs

"we were not 'rescued'" and "stuck up mediocrities" will forever be iconic

"he lacks respect"

this whole scene always makes me laugh tbh

so many good quotes

"you take the lie, and you take Kipps' face and put them together--"

"and you just wanna watch him... die"

"please tell me there's tea" mood AND THEN HE'S THE ONE MAKING TEA

concerned bbs again

"you're just not rude enough to her, George"

the way he appears round that door 😭

FUCK OFF JOPLIN

hand

I will not be discussing the sound I made at lockwood sat in the chair after passing on the business card

Georgie no

spiky shoes

my dried mango I'm eating is so good

"pre-pleb?"

lockwood's so pretty omg

so is lucy

hmmmmmmmmmm lockwood

^^^

why does his mouth not move

also why was that hot

rainy taxi

hand

George looks so excited talking about the black market I love him

hand

George I love you

lockwood could your ego get any bigger (but also hehehe)

"proper honest blokes, real salt of the earth"

"you've never even spoken to them"

*pause* "yeah well they're a bit scary"

"go write a poem about it!" George you beautiful human being

showman speech! showman speech!

hand

BOBBY I CANT HEAR ANYTHING BUT BESHPOKELY NOW

"you will have my undivided attention" gbsgsukrhgosuruhgksh I would melt and then evaporate when he smiled

"no backbone this generation!"

"I am not filling out more forms" mood

he's so pretttyyyyyyyyy

NOT THE CAMERA SPINNING AROUND LIKE THE BONE GLASS

woo they have chains now!

lockwood is so angry

"it knows you're there" oh very comforting

bzzzzzzzzzzzz

JOPLIN GO AWAY

omg Lucy nooo

hehehe it's her bestie

touching locklyle moment of: "Luce, what's going on? are you okay?"

*George in the background* "WhERe'S mY LiGht?"

bestieeee

yeah well don't open it

"stand by" lockwood honey she's not in any state of mind to deal with this

Georgie nooooo

idk if it's a thing but the fact that lockwood was the only seemingly unaffected??? Lucy obviously has Listening, and George can do some of the Touch stuff, so does that mean they're more susceptible to psychic emotions? George had the nausea and Lucy had the headache and all the rest of it but lockwood was fine? idk

"all someone had to do was apply themselves!" iconic

DON'T FEEL EXCITED BITCH

GEORGIE NOOO

whoops

bit dusty now

BADASS BITCH MOMENTTTTTTT

THROW THAT RAPIER!!!!

heavily breathing lockwood 👀

hehehe bestieeee

already trying to get out lolllllll

oh no the boys are fighting :(

"you'd never bollock her like this would you"

tired-of-this-lockwood is one of my favourites I think

"iS iT tALkInG tO yOu nOw?"

oops

don't talk about the room

"clinically insane-" "really FUCKING powerful" I love them

"you gave her a free pass just 'cause you like the way she looks at you" ok 1) DUDE SAID THAT WITH LUCY IN THE ROOM I LOVE HIM and 2) honestly I am lockwood bc I too would give her a free pass if Lucy looked at me like 😍 (or even if she just looked at me tbh)

"I don't know what you're talking about" "yeah sure" I AM GEORGE IN THIS SITUATION

boy's angry

"why, 'cause you can't handle being my Tom Rotwell?" OOOO WHAT A BLOW TO THE EGO

THE MICROEXPRESSSIONS S SIESR0[HORUSHGOSRUHGOA CAMERON CHAPMAN THE MAN YOU AREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

sorry can you tell I love that bit

aw Georgie nooo

lanky boy

I WANNA GIVE HIM A HUGGGG :((((

Georgie noooo

IS THAT MARY WATSON

is that a FQD I see?

hehehe he's so silly

"he was a massive prick to me just now" he deserved that

awkward teens hehehe

SJRHGIUSRHGOURHSOUGHSEORIGJORS THIS SCENENEEEEEEE

TENDING TO WOUNDSSSSSSSSSSDSDIUSGHESIUHGOSUR H

"the real reason you might be here is to shine it on somebody else" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

WHY AM I TEARING UP (I think it's the hormones actually)

HE IS SO BAD AT NOT LOOKING AT HER LIPS (me too)

his smileeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

WHY AM I CRYING

WTF

HE LOOKED AT HER LIPS AGAIN

NOW THEY'RE TENDERLY HOLDING HANDS

NOT THE PINKY FINGER

NOT HIM LOOKING AT HER LIPS FOR THE THIRD TIME

omg the awkwardness after they sat in silence staring at each other and holding hands

ok but the fact they cut to george's room but showed it through the mirror on his wardrobe???????? omggggg deep analysis of when mirrors are used here we come

he's so pretty

peekaboo

not the biscuit 😭

"do not cross" *crosses*

he looks like a guilty child

he sounds like one too

"absolutely by the book" sure...

BOBBYYYYYYYY

heavily breathing lockwood hmmmmmmm

I'm sorry I can't take bobby Vernon seriously bc I just think of bobby (who isn't that small) and I laugh

I've had to pause it which is a problem bc it's gonna take me a while to get through this 😭

he's so smug omg 😭

"there you go, sir" with as much smugness as possible

screeching like a parrot at bobby's laugh

I actually can't stop laughing this is ridiculous

"yes, I do, actually" YOU SHOW THEM GEORGIE

"you sure you do?" "I know who that man is"

"this better be good Karim" *immediately aims his attack at bobby*

"they'll be glad of the work, but this is Phoenician" I AM A PROUD BESTIE JUST LIKE LOCKWOOD AND LUCY ARE IN THAT MOMENT

"bobby, just a hunch. something I read in a book, if you remember those" I LOVE HIM YOUR HONOUR

he's having so much fun being smarter than bobby Vernon and I love it

"thank you bobby, you've been a wonderful assistant"

*gets a shot of just him concluding his point like the DIs in death in paradise while looking awesome*

"shut up karim" "you thought it was a brewer!" ah, rivalry

lockwood looks so thin (like thinner than he normally does) he kinda looked like a cartoon I won't lie

barnes is so done

"shall we get hotdogs"

he's so smug

stop calling him irrelevant bestie

lucy's "oh for god's sake" in the background is me

"Quill Kipps, the walking appendix" ok 1) honey go to bed and 2) why was the way he said that kinda 👀🤭

lockwood seriously go to bed, your brain is clearly not functioning properly

"three less amateurs stumbling around" um kipps if you're going to insult them could you at least say fewer? (I'm a pedant just like lockwood)

"what the hell is he doing" "whatever the hell he wants" hehehe

[irritablepoe]

oh?? mushitarou is in the blorbo supreme ranks? you gots any headcanons???

anon, i'm so sorry for the late reply, i hope you will forgive me <3

idk if i would call what i have "headcanons" it's more like guesses or questions regarding what he did before everything. it's said that he met yokomizo in their years of study (i'm gonna guess it's university? if i'm mistaken, do tell me). so, did he study literature? or some occultism (if that's even a valid degree lmao)? philosophy? i'm gonna guess literature tho, the occult is probably just his field of interest. also how did the two of them meet? were they in the same course? they seem so different and pretend to dislike each other a lot - were they rivals in class or sth?

also about mushitarous ability: if we believe the theory that abilities manifest when trauma is induced, why does mushitarous gives him the ability to remove all evidence of a crime? maybe he had to be incredibly sneaky as a kid and thus developed this kind of ability? maybe something went terribly wrong when he was younger and he wished it had never happened (which it appeared to then. bc there was no evidence anymore). so that's also a question i'm thinking about a lot

also: how did he get in contact with poe to sell the manuscript? i mean to not be suspicious he had to make it public in some way so that poe might stumble upon it right? howwwww did they communicate??? over the fucking black market or sth? but wouldn't that be too obvious??? and too risky in case someone was just as interested and rich as poe was??? idk. if anyone has a guess lmk

and i know this is not a hc either BUT... him crying over yokomizo. hello?? HELLO???? and also everything after that, like the hallucinations and him taking yokomizos advice in regards to mystery solving and stuff. yokomizo never included mushitarous advice in his books but mushitarou is now doing it in his life and in his own attempts to write mystery. asagiri wrote that and didn't expect me to go insane over them??? AHHHH

last point and i think this might be a hc: i think mushitarou IS in fact incredibly sneaky. there's no way fyodor revealed his plans with the page to mushitarou so how did he know? well, we know that he can sneak in basically everywhere as long as he can erase the evidence from security cameras and stuff. so did he just break into fyodors... office??? and stole this information? but then again fyodor apparently didn't want ango and mushitarou to meet but that's because of other information right? or did fyodor place that information there so the ada might act before that and he'll have nothing on his neck when the full moon arrives? that is in case he's alive tho... i think i have to rewatch that episode but it's making me insane too.

alrighty, i think that's it (for now at least hehe :3), i know these weren't hcs but i hope it's still something :D

[mediacinemtographyartetc]

Spoilers for season one Next in Fashion!

Okay I'm going to do a Next in fashion video analysis of all the contestents the fashion the winners as well as an analysis on the show and my personal opinion.

Spoilers under cut- images of outfits for Episode one.

Next in Fashion Season one has a diverse cast of different colours both inside and out. Wether they are queer, straight black or white this is a room full of creatives in a competition giving a prompt.

The best part? That so many are proffesionals, I rarely see people who have already worked with A-listers and considered the best of the best competing against each other its like seeing the olympics but for artistic expression.

This group was full of loud, expressive and creative personalities all in one room.

So I can't really speak about culture or other prejudice- but I do want to talk about the outfits and my own opinions on who won and who went home. I disagreed with some of the judges takes and opinions while others I agreed with.

I kinda fell in love with Next in fashion but I will admit I am aware it was a mixed bag full of...issues, there were some things that I did deem problematic. But when the season expressed itself as activists, bringing awareness I would've assumed they would put things in place to accomadate that in the next season.

Overall, I think Next in Fashion season one;

Is a window into the fashion world.

It felt as if all these designers who worked with a-list celebrities were getting their voices heard. It was an insight into the fashion industry and was able to present a ton of hard topics and discussions in a way that was relatable and beliveable.

They revealed hard truths, ones I especially agree with and find understandable. Which I'll get to later, just to let you know in advanced though.

I know nothing about fashion-

but I do find an interest in it, as a creator I know I cant wear certain clothes but my characters can and find I have one ear on the fashion world but overall I dont know enough to be a professional.

So we start with the first episode: The red Carpet.

A look you can see actors, hollywood stars and influencers to wear and be interviewed on the red carpet something bold, stunning as well as jaw dropping so who did I think should've won and whose outfit was just not my idea of what I'd call great [but to remind you guys the reason I'm not a fashion person is that art is subjective what I find meh someone can love and it can be developed into an open market as long as theres a target audience and people like something then theres no such thing as bad art]

So onto the prompt: RED CARPET.

Winner: Angelo and Charles. Sent Home: Issac and Nasheli.

First off I have to say- this sucked. It was so unfair for Nasheli to leave especially since Issac was a huge tit. He did fuck all, gave Nasheli shit material and told her to make it work then said we're a team :D and when he was sent home he gave no shit- he said it was just another day! This was grossly unfair to Nasheli she should've been put on a different team or should've been asked to come next year and try again she deserved another chance it was grossly unfair that she was tripped at the finish line and couldn't have a chance to show off her talent because of an incompetent partner.

Anyway: Angel and Minju Red Carpet piece.

I loved this, I love the colour, the boy and the silouette. I find this so pretty and fell in love with this outfit on the spot 10/10 :D

Next up is : Ashton and Marco

Its a no from me 4/10, my reason is that I find this so basic, its a boring silouette feels like something someone wore back in the 2000's also that belt in the middle of her chest? I hated that when she moved it was moving and flip flopping all over the place it distracted me and made me look at her boobs even in the shot above I can see the belt moving slightly. I dont hate the dress but for a red carpet its a meh.

Next up is : Issac and Nesheli

I think the overall look the collor plus the bust and the oversized pocket at her stomach is distracting my focul point was aimed there instead of the overall look. The fabric was uncomfortable for the model to move in and couldn't go to the bathroom overall wearability was non existent. What is heartbreaking was how most voices in the show was steamrolled by their partners and most felt as if they werent heard. In this sense it's awkward because of artistic differences you dont know wether to trust your partner if their choice ends up making or breaking your chance in the competition. 1/10

Next up is farai and Kiki:

Again I love this colour and overall liked the look, when I first saw it I loved it. But the more I looked at it I thought hmm so it's more of a 7/10 personally I do think it looks more like something my mum would wear on holiday at the beach than a red carpet if I could change one thing it would be the jacket. Either have that fabric pattern at the top or bottom of the outfit OR Change the jacket to a darker purple to make it more as a gradient.

I think if it was a slightly shade darker it would be able to narrow down the focul point better- but I'm speaking as an artist on colour theory not as a pro fashion advice I am aware fashion is different so even though thats my personall opinion on the change I'm aware that sometimes peoples ideas are different to mine.

Next up is : Carli and Daniel

I might get a few raised eyebrows but this was a meh, from me. I thought it was safe I did like the colours pearing blues with browns and a soft white as the top colour theory, and structure as well as the bold move of a pant/skirt with pockets! Did look amazing. Idk I just think it was a 6/10 for me.

Next up is : Narresh and Lorena

HARD YES 10/10 I loved this outfit, I like the shape, the colours I love the back as well as the asymetrical sleeve I just- I freakin love this outfit I would want to wear this and twirl around in it.

Next up is : Julian and Hayley

I liked it at first, but yeah it does seem a bit incomplete but overall 5/10

And then theres : Claire and Adolfo

hmm Nope. NOPE. I don't like it 0/10- look art us subjective not many people will love it and I'm not one of those people, there is artistic differences and as an artist I don't like it. Other than the split at the side but it feels done before, and it feels so rubbery and stiff when the model walks, I just I cant nope.

And last but not least, Angelo And charlie.

My immiediete thought was "The matrix." Or any other 90's film. I do like the hot pink skirt just peeking out on the back but overall. Its kinda basic just another black dress I can't even love the trail when the model walked I couldn't help but think it wasn't laying right and seemed to be stiff once she dropped it. I can't help but think that the judges were too blown away by the tail drop than to actually see the dress it makes me think of x-factor when they give the golden buzzer to the child singer. Not because they were good or it was a talented song just because it was instent gratification. Overall I like it but its just meh to me 4/10....which is ironic since they're the ones who WON.

So yeah since what I LIKED and what the judges choose, just comes to show why I'm not making a career out of fashion either I'm too far ahead or tar far behind the times for what fashion even IS I just get annoyed that what I happen to like was something the judges were put off by...so let me know what YOU guys think were good tell ME which red carpet look you would rank out of 10 and let me know for the red Carpet look who YOU think the winner should've been???

I might do more episodes if this does well but if not? w/e

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

I posted 1,052 times in 2022

That's 538 more posts than 2021!

154 posts created (15%)

898 posts reblogged (85%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@tugboatdaddywolf

@ivyace

@hallandoates1970topresent

@ancientson

@taguelfright

I tagged 1,038 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#demetri alexopoulos - 546 posts

#eli moskowitz - 508 posts

#elimetri - 479 posts

#demetri cobra kai - 463 posts

#binary boyfriends - 461 posts

#hawk - 423 posts

#hawkmeat - 362 posts

#cobra kai - 154 posts

#allvalley100 - 148 posts

#miguel diaz - 141 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#eli is a fae because you simply cannot tell me that anyone who does their hair like that doesn't have fae energy like. at least a little bit

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Season 4, Episode 6: An Extremely Chaotic and Incoherent Review

My favorite episode!!! GET READY FOR HEAD FULL MANY THOUGHTS

The Good:

"Kicks Get Chicks" *is the gayest episode in the entire season* Kicks get DICKS more like

"Sure, we're good for the occasional inspirational moment, but we're not exactly center mat material" HA, love that this fucker is self aware

He knows he's the Comic Relief Guy and he embraces it fully

"He who shall not be named" absolutely LOVE how Demetri just fucking despises Robby now but is trying to be lowkey about it so as not to stir the pot

If he could I'm pretty sure Demetri would pummel this man six ways to Sunday

Once again reminding everyone that Robby paralyzed and nearly killed Demetri's best friend, betrayed his and Demetri's dojo, and then held down and forcefully shaved Demetri's other best friend

Yeah he wants to like...murder Robby at this point honestly

I can't blame him, either--if someone fucked over my bestie, my dojo, AND my crush??? I would indeed be out for blood, yes

The way Demetri looks CRUSHED when Daniel's like "I know you're missing your friends but we have to put the past behind us" :( :( :(

He just wants his boyfriend back god bless

Wow no wonder Tory's fucked up, with an aunt like THAT

GOOD LORD

This season is kinda making me love Tory, I'll admit

I never thought I'd see the day but here we are

SIAHDZUIYVDX JOHNNY TRAINING IN A PLACE WITH BLACK MOLD

Could this man BE any more delightfully unhinged

Johnny Lawrence's dojo marketing will never NOT be hysterical

"Smack-dab between the pipe supply and the burned-down Chuck E. Cheese" SIR

"I'm asexual" WELL at least we exist on television, right???

I guess this is the queer rep we get for Season 4, RIP

YOOOOO IT'S MY GIRL MOON

"I can't do the whole physical aggression thing" Remind me again why she and ELI FREAKING MOSKOWITZ are meant to be compatible at all??? Literally what even would they talk about??? Well REGARDLESS, can't help but admire her staunch determination to be a pacifist in a high school singlehandedly spearheading the local karate wars

"She's the best athlete in school and she's not afraid to get into a fight" Okay don't get me wrong, I'm still seething over Moon and Piper breaking up, BUT I do find it absolutely HYSTERICAL that Moon apparently has a type

Even funnier that Yasmine lowkey fits her type too, which is apparently mean, cocky bitches who don't take shit from anyone

Oh SHIT, Sam catching Amanda talking to Tory??? This boutta get JUICY

OKAY HERE WE GO HERE WE GO

BASEMENT SCENE LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO

See the full post

79 notes - Posted January 15, 2022

#4

Season 4, Episode 10: An Extremely Chaotic and Incoherent Review

The Good:

LISTEN

LISTEN

YOU CAN'T JUST HAVE THESE GUYS PULL OUT THE MOST APT STAR WARS PREQUEL MEMES OF ALL TIME

AND NOT THINK I'M GONNA SHIP THE SHIT OUT OF THEM

DID ELI REALLY JUST SAY DEM SHOULD PULL AN "IT'S OVER ANAKIN I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND" ON ROBBY

WITH A STRAIGHT FACE

I can't with this man

I can 100% not tell if these boys are memeing or actually taking karate advice from the Star Wars prequels but honestly??? I fucking love it either way

Dumbasses (affectionate)

ALSO the absolutely doe-eyed way Eli looks at Demetri when he says "you're taller!!" Yeah you like your men taller, don't you, short king?

Come to think of it Eli has been basically nonstop giving Demetri doe eyes all season

Maybe that's just what his face looks like?

Nah he's still kinda smug smirking at the beginning of the season

But he does become very apt at looking like a sad puppy

I swear this fucker still looks at Demetri like he hung the sun though

Ohhhhh Demetri just going RUTHLESSLY at Robby fills me with LIFE

Demetri Alexopoulos and Robby Keene mortal enemies WHEN

Still morbidly satisfying to see all that paralysis, shaving, and dojo-betraying beef explode out of my boy Demetri in one fell swoop

Oh shit!!! The head kick!!! The THROWDOWN!!! We are at last seeing a glimpsed of the unhinged Demetri I have craved for so long, keep being scary my love

DID HE JUST DO THE "COME AT ME BRO" HAND MOVEMENT

OH HE IS SO PISSED

Seeing this gay nerd be aggressive and intense as hell is ascending me into nirvana

He has found his inner craving for violence and destruction, and I think that's very valid of him

Truly he and Eli are kindred spirits in ways S1 Demetri never could have imagined

You gotta love some irony

He's gone from yeeting out of every bad situation to being like "this dude shaved off my boyfriend's gay-ass hairdo and now I'm going to beat him to kingdom come"

You know what that is? GROWTH

Poor Daniel though, he's like "Oh no :( :( :( My karate sons are fighting :( :( :("

See the full post

80 notes - Posted January 20, 2022

#3

Mr. LaRusso says anyone can be the hero, but I’m not Batman! I’m more like Alfred. You’re Batman!

***

Y’all thought I was gonna watch Season 4 and then NOT do a moodboard of The Basement Scene??? Preposterous. Completely absurd. Literally just gave me too many Vibes to work with for them not to be utilized.

Tried for more grayish/neutral colors for this one! Hopefully it’s not too boring ^^; I wanted to match the general energy of the scene, and both Demetri and Eli seem to be feeling kind of sad and empty here, SO.

Very happy I found a picture of “I love you” written in binary code ;_____;

Also, it has been said, but I’ll say it again: You have Demetri look at Eli like that, and...what??? Expect me to buy Demetri isn’t deeply in love with him??? To buy that Demetri Alexopoulos’s feelings for his best friend are nothing but platonic??? I respectfully disagree, and also, you are an idiot.

The top left pic is what should’ve happened after the basement scene XD

Pic credits available upon request!

82 notes - Posted January 24, 2022

#2

“They were expecting to find Miguel Diaz. What they weren’t expecting to find was love.”

Imagining of Season 5 in which Demetri and Eli go on a totally straight and totally heterosexual Dudebro road trip to Mexico to find their best friend. Unfortunately, when you’re trapped in a car with someone for hours on end, you might have to start confronting some feelings you wish weren’t there.

Well, everyone, I caved. I fucking caved. I said so many times that I wasn’t going to write CK fanfiction because GODDAMN if I don’t have too many WIPs in other fandoms, but like. The desire to write a homoerotic road trip fic was just too damn much.

I’ve never tried formally writing these two before, so I have no idea if it’s any good, but GOD did I try lol. Not much plot here, mostly just Vibes, gay tension, and missing and worrying about Best Boy Miguel!!! Also written partly out of spite because I’m just constantly seeing Miguel/Demetri friendship erasure in the fandom and it’s gotten me HEATED, so now I’m writing about Demetri going off to find Miguel in Mexico and internally monologuing about how worried he is and y’all just gonna have to deal with it. Fun fact: Miguel and Demetri love each other, and I will not hear otherwise under any circumstances :D

Also I can’t believe I’ve been in this fandom over a year and it took fucking writing this fic to realize Demetri has an extremely bad case of generalized anxiety disorder D: Like he worries about every all the time and honestly? Same

Uhhhhh CW for mentions of human trafficking, even if it’s done in jest (they’re teenage boys after all, this is the kinda thing teenage boys joke about lol) and some zesty...physical references, but the sauciest thing they do is make out because I’m asexual and do not wish to write smut XD

Fic is under the cut!!! Be warned, it is a 4k word longboi!!!

EDIT: There is now a sequel here as well!!!

***

“I cannot even begin to tell you how unsafe this is.”

“Uh huh. Go on.”

“I’m serious, Eli! We’re parked out in the middle of nowhere in a desert that never ends and the only signs of civilization are those cars going by on the highway at like 90 miles an hour. This is how people get kidnapped. And used for…I don’t know, human trafficking or something.”

Eli rolls over from where he lies next to Demetri on the car roof, scowling at him. “You think the traffickers are going to want you?”

Demetri scoffs, offended at the implication. “I’ll have you know I am a catch! The hottest girl in school thought so for a while.”

Eli breaks into a smirk. “Didn’t Yasmine like…use you as a beard, dude?”

“That’s not—she’s not—she didn’t—look, it doesn’t count if she didn’t know she was lesbian until after we got together!” Demetri splutters, gesturing vaguely as he attempts to arrive at a point.

“Wouldn’t that make it even worse?”

“Still speaks volumes to my suave disposition that she had no issue appearing to be dating me.”

“I’ll never understand it.” Eli turns away, gaze flicking back up to the stars.

“As I was saying.” Demetri stubbornly goes on. Someone has to knock some sense into Eli Moskowitz—access that logical coding brain he knows is in there somewhere. “Just because we’re a little ways off the main road doesn’t mean someone isn’t going to see us parked out in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. They could still come out here, break into the car, and do—well, whatever they want! It’s not like anyone would hear us yelling for help. We should have gotten a motel room.”

Eli snorts. “What, are we throwing hundred dollar bills around like we’re Terry Fucking Silver? It was hard enough mooching enough gas money off my mom. Besides, we know karate. If anyone comes after us, we could take them.”

Demetri rolls his eyes. “Right, my bad. I forgot I’m under the protection of the latest AVT champ.”

“Damn right.”

“I’m holding you to that, by the way. If we get kidnapped, and you can’t fend them off, I’m going to be really mad.”

“Completely understandable.”

A lull passes over the boys. For several moments, there’s no sound but desert wind, the hum of crickets and cicadas, and the sound of distant traffic. They had pulled off onto some dirt service road and driven for a while before they arrived and parked at what Eli decided was “the perfect sleeping spot.”

“I can’t believe you’re not tired,” Eli pipes up. “You’ve been driving like…all day.”

Demetri shrugs, car roof cool against his neck and shoulders. The sweltering daytime heat has long since faded from the metal.

“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t know when I’d get the chance to stargaze again. It’s kind of hard with all the light pollution. I remember we used to try on your trampoline, and whenever we’d get excited about a particularly bright one, it would turn out to be LAX’s newest outgoing flight.”

“Yeah, there’s a lot more going on out here. Might as well enjoy it.”

See the full post

175 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Binary Boyfriends S4 Fix-It Fics That I Need Immediately

WHAT UP BINARY BOYFRIENDS NATION, WHO’S READY TO WRITE SOME FIX-IT FIC???

Apologies in advance if any of these have already been done, but consider!!! I am always down to see more!!!

Psyche! Its turns out Yasmine and Demetri both are absolutely aware that they’re gay and are 100% faking a straight relationship to seem more cool and normal! The only reason they sell the horniness so well is because they’re both theatrical motherfuckers and wanna see how much they can overdramatically ham it up to fool the entire school into thinking they’re heterosexual

Demetri attempts to stand up for Hawk with Chris and Nate! Make no mistake, not because I think it would work, but because Demetri sometimes has 0 tact when he gets angry and I think the fallout would be very funny

Demetri and Hawk spar, but Hawk accidentally hits Demetri too hard!!! Angst ensues!!!

Demetri and Hawk spar, and they get all amped up on adrenaline and suddenly one is shoving the other against the dojo wall and making out with them!!! The entire dojo sees them and it’s very funny

Demetri jumps off the building!!! And brags about it to Hawk!!! Hawk looks at him with heart eyes because he’s a badass!!!

Alternatively, Demetri tries to jump and lands on the mattresses. He has to go to the hospital. Hawk visits him and switches between heaping on adoring praise for being so ballsy and yelling at Demetri for being so stupid and scaring the shit out of him.

Bonus points if Demetri literally only jumped to impress Hawk

Demetri and Hawk being utter and complete overprotective karate dads to Nate and Bert

Like remember how they both adopted them as their sons??? LET’S DO SOMETHING WITH THAT

Demetri dyeing Hawk’s hair in the bathtub and it’s very intimate and they keep aggressively tryna No Homo it

I think this may have already been done but I am literally always down to see it again

POV: You’re a Cobra Kai goon about to help the scary Keene kid shave off some dude’s gay-ass purple mohawk when there’s a crash and the most gangly, uncoordinated dweeb you’ve ever seen busts in through the tattoo shop window

You’re like “who’s this clown”

But “clown” as in horror movie clown specifically, because this interloper has a mildly to moderately unsettling look on his face

Cue the unsettling clown saying “Evening gentlemen :) :) :) Hope you’re not about to do something you regret to my pal Eli here :) :) :)” in a really quiet and calm tone of voice, which is. DEEPLY terrifying

*cue Demetri breaking into the world’s hugest and most horrifying slasher smile*

And he unleashes nine levels of hell on the Cobras, because he deserves to

Bonus points if he steals the razor and goes just a BIT slash-happy on them

Or strangles Kyler with the belt thing he was holding Eli down with

I just think Demetri should be allowed to completely fucking lose it and become the scariest motherfucker you’ve ever seen when someone messes with his boyfriend Eli Moskowitz

No really, just stop what you’re doing and imagine Demetri chasing Kyler through the tattoo parlor with a shaver Shining-style like “HEEEEERE’S ‘METRI!”

Like would that fuck or WHAT

On a related note, Demetri going full Slasher Movie Villain on the Cobras to get revenge after they shave the ‘hawk would also be acceptable

I think he should bring Miguel along too, I think that would be neat

Just a couple of best bros going to inflict unspeakable violence on the ne’er-do-wells who brutally violated their other best bro, don’t mind them

Demetri still gets to be more unhinged through

Because a) that’s his fucking boyfriend whose hair they’re avenging and b) Miguel has already gotten to be scary on many occasions!!! Let Demetri have a turn!!!

See the full post

181 notes - Posted January 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

...okay so not nearly as funny as last year's (where my 2nd most popular post was my dumb Scott Pilgrim shitpost) but I'm very pleased with my longest tag. It's very correct and absolutely hysterical.

Wild that I apparently posted more than I did at the height of my 2021 hyperfixation. I guess Season 4 and my frantic desire to ramble about everything will do that to ya.

AKAJSDIPVFOU LOOK AT CHAPTER 1 OF THE ROAD TRIP FIC MAKING IT INTO MY TOP 5 GOOD FOR HIM GOOD FOR HIM

(Obligatory reminder that all 6 chapters of the road trip fic are on my AO3 SummerPhlox if you want to read/comment there lol)

YO CONGRATS TO MY BLORBO DEMETRI ALEXOPOULOS FOR BEING MY #1 TAG OF 2022 I'M SO PROUD OF MY SON GOOD FOR HIM

And my other blorbo Miguel Diaz making the top 10 tags too, we love to see it <3

Happy almost-2-year-anniversary to this blog lmao what the fuck I thought I'd have a little mini baby hyperfixation on some nerdy karate gays and then I'd go about my business but irl plot twists are more wild than any movie I've ever seen because somehow I'm still fucking here

[stedelovesed]

Creating generative value

Or: Why We Need to Stop Worrying and Trust that Nathan Foad Will Be Back for Season 2

Gals, gays and theys, (swash)buckle up. What we were hoping, crying and begging for happened: in early June, our beloved gay pirate show Our Flag Means Death was renewed for season 2. We’re going to get our BlackBonnet reunion. Repeat: we are going to get our BlackBonnet reunion. Stede and Ed are going to be together again, and they are going to talk about their feelings, and they are going to be happy. This, I manifest. 

Of course, there’s someone else that we are all desperate to see - Lucius Spriggs, the Revenge’s scribe, played by Nathan Foad. David Jenkins, creator, writer and executive producer of OFMD, recently Tweeted an image of the season 2 premiere script to announce that filming for season 2 had begun. The Tweet was accompanied by a very cryptic caption: “Anyone care to have their shit fucked up? Because this is happening. 🏴‍☠️💔🦄 #OurFlagMeansDeath #justiceforluciusrip” Leon Miller, writing for CBR.com, reckons that Jenkins’ hashtag #justiceforluciusrip “seemingly confirmed that Nathan Foad's Lucius Spriggs did indeed die at the hands of Taika Waititi's Blackbeard” in the Season 1 finale, "Wherever You Go, There You Are." 

Devastating if true, of course. Foad’s Lucius was nothing short of incredible. At the risk of sounding cliché, he’s the heart of the ship; warm, gentle, supportive, and, as a viewer, so, so funny. We watched as he comforted Stede during the events of the eighth episode, “We Gull Way Back, as Stede battled with feelings of jealousy towards Ed’s old friend and former lover, Calico Jack. Lucius’s romance with Black Pete (Matthew Maher) is nothing short of joyous. It’s deep and complex and filled with love, desire and respect - just another example of how this show elevates and prioritises queerness. 

The final episode, though. Agh. My heart hurts to think about it. Ed is heartbroken and believes that Stede left him on the beach because he didn’t love him back, and his coping mechanism is to wander around the Revenge in Stede’s old robe and take sad baths. Lucius is there for him through it all, offering support and kindness to Ed. And Ed, heartbroken Ed, decides to push Lucius over the side of the ship and leave him to die. 

Brutal. I still can’t believe I even typed those words. If I had more space in this post, I’d explain, at length, why I believe that Ed was so utterly devastated with grief that having Lucius around was just a reminder of Stede, but I don’t, so I won’t. Nevertheless, I’m convinced that we haven’t seen the last of Lucius Spriggs. Sure, Nathan Foad hasn’t been posting on Instagram about being in New Zealand for filming like other cast members. Sure, David Jenkins’ Tweet and hashtag don’t really give us a lot of hope for Lucius’ survival. Here’s the thing, though: Lucius will come back for season 2, and here’s why.

First of all, for all the reasons I’ve mentioned above and more - Lucius Spriggs is the heart and soul of the Revenge. If there’s one thing OFMD knows, it’s how to give its viewers the warm fuzzies. Second, the absolute drama that will erupt when Lucius appears, alive and well, on deck after Ed thought he’d killed him - there’s no way that David Jenkins would deprive us of Foad’s exquisite facial expressions during a scene like this. Third - and perhaps this is the cynic in me - but we’re here talking about it, aren’t we? OFMD is a television show that skyrocketed in popularity through word-of-mouth. Fandom is one of the best media marketing tools there is, and even for that reason alone, the ‘surprise’ return in season 2 of one of OFMD’s best characters would cause the fandom to go into meltdown, even if it was just to Tweet, “I told you so #Luciuslives”.

[acourtofsnakes]

A Helping Hand - Bucky Barnes x Reader (f)

(Gif: @sebastianruinedme​ )

Summary: After a stressful week, you try to wind down with some personal time but nothing quite hits that spot. And a certain Super Soldier may just be more than willing to help you. 

Warnings: 18+ Smut - Masturbation/toys, Oral (f receiving), fingering, neck play, arm/hand kink, dirty talk, a faint Dom theme if you squint, swearing – honestly, Bucky should just be a kink in himself.

Word count: 5k+ words full of hot playtime. 

A/N: This is just filth, to be honest. I was feeling a certain way after watching episode 3 of TFATWS and seeing that scene with Bucky cleaning his hand and… ideas happened, and this was born. There’s not really a plot… simply enjoy. 

Smut under the cut!!

Permanent Taglist: @greeneyedblondie44 @mamacitapascal​

Part 2

There was something to be said about the advancement of toys in recent years. 

There were hundreds of them. All different types. For all different things. 

Rabbits, waterproof vibrators, pulsating and pounding ones, ones that felt like oral, handsfree vibrators, remote control vibrators – the list went on. 

You had a lot. Tucked in a drawer of your dresser in a pretty box that just made you go all tingly in the knees every time you saw it. 

You were proud of your collection. 

And boy, did you love them. 

They never let you down, ever. 

But unfortunately, tonight was just not one of those nights. 

It has been a tough week. 

Not only had you taken a beating in training yesterday, but you were also late for an appointment across the city, which resulted in being yelled at by Fury. 

You really regretted decided to help him when he needed it. 

There wasn’t a lot going on lately, so you offered to help Fury when he needed it. 

Usually, you were on his food side. 

Yesterday, not so much. 

Everything seemed out to get you, and after the shit show of the week, you just wanted to treat yourself. So, you’d holed yourself up in your room on your floor of the compound, had a long, luxurious soak in the bath, and then decided to work out your anxiety and tension with one of your many, many friends. 

And for the first time in a while, they just weren’t hitting that spot. 

Literally. 

You groaned, throwing the third toy - this one a rabbit that was one of your most trusty companions - on the side of your bed. 

For the last forty minutes, you’d been dancing between three different toys and your fingers. 

You’d tried being on your belly, your side, and your back. You’d even tried a pillow. 

But nothing was the right pressure on your clit, no toy or finger felt deep enough inside, and you couldn’t hit that spot inside without getting a wicked cramp in your wrist that forced you to stop. 

You sat up, every nerve in your body wound to a knife edge, leaving you frustrated and tempted to throttle someone. 

Or get someone to throttle you. 

Preferably whilst pinning you to a wall... or a desk. 

Or anywhere really. 

You just needed something, anything to get out this frustration and give you the release you’d been desperately chasing all night. 

It wasn’t even a case of hovering on the edge - you couldn’t even get there. The fire and heat just stayed a kindling ember in your belly, and never reaching that explosive fire. 

After getting up and downing a measure of whiskey whilst watching the rain, you decided to try a last-ditch attempt with a different toy. 

This one was a curved vibrator, with a thicker rounder head for supposedly perfect pressure on your g-spot. 

Simple, straight forward. 

Surely, if none of the others had done it, this one finally would. 

After settling back on your bed, you took a little more care this time, even going as far to light a few candles to add an ambiance to the room rather than have it pitch black with the sounds of the rain. 

You worked yourself up this time, building it slowly, teasing yourself with brushes of your fingertips over your throat and breasts, setting your skin ablaze. 

You pushed yourself to the edge a little, and then worked over with your vibrator. 

Until ten minutes later, when you literally launched the vibrator across the room and it hit the wall with a resounding thud, that echoed your hiss of frustration.  “Fucking hell.”  

A shit week, a shit day, and you couldn’t even fuck yourself well enough to be able to wind down and get some sleep. 

There was a sudden knock and then Bucky’s voice echoed through your bedroom door. “Darlin’?” There was a slight hint of his Brooklyn accent peeping through at the end, stirring something within you. 

You startled, sitting bolt upright and your head snapped to the door, “Bucky?” You had the good sense to lock the door, but still. He was right there. 

His shadow moved beneath the door, and you realised he was leaning against it, “Is everything alright? I heard banging.” 

Well, no not really. I’ve been trying to get myself off for the last hour and nothing appears to be working and I’m sitting here naked whilst you’re the other side of my door calling me Darling in that ridiculously hot accent that shouldn’t even be that hot. But hey, apart from that, everything’s great. 

You slid off the bed, padding across the room after dropping your toys back in their drawer, glaring at it as you passed. You slipped a robe on before making your way across the fluffy rug to the door, “Yeah, I’m okay...” You unlocked the door, tugging it open. 

Bucky was leaning against the doorframe, all broad shoulders, long lines and soft smile. 

His searing blue eyes were instantly locked onto you, a smirk playing on those gorgeous lips.

He cocked his head, standing there with his arms crossed, and you noticed that for once, he wasn’t wearing any gloves. Just a simple long-sleeved T-shirt, jeans that hung sinfully close to his hips and... no boots. Just socks. 

Like he’d taken his shoes off before waking into your apartment. 

Ever the gentleman. 

His arm was bare, the soft light of the hall bouncing off of the black vibranium and sparking the gold. You’d always loved his arm. The sheer power of it, the way you’d seen it shatter a man’s ribs instantly and tear through a brick wall like it was made of glass. The same hand that tickled behind the ears of a stray kitten in Prospect Park and test the ripeness of plums at the market. 

You wanted that hand around your throat. 

Eyes the colour of the Arctic sea roamed over your body, from your slightly mussed up hair to the flush along your neck that disappeared in the dip of your dressing gown. “Mm... are you sure about that?” He tilted his coyly, a smirk playing on his lips and you had a feeling this expression had been one of the trademarks since the 40’s. 

You narrowed your eyes at him, more than aware that he was seeing far more than you wanted him to, “I’m fine.” You turned from the door, leaving it open for him to come in, “How comes you’re up on my floor, anyway?” You peered over your shoulder at him as you padded across the room to the drinks cart. 

Yes, there was a bar on your floor, but why couldn’t you have a cart in your room? Tony hadn’t even needed to ask when designing it. 

Bucky walked in, his footfalls silent like a cat, that training never quite leaving him, “I couldn’t sleep. No nightmares, just restless.” He added the last part quickly, in response to the concern that tightened your expression. 

It was nothing unusual, Bucky coming up here to your room.  

You often found each other after nightmares or rough days, seeking comfort and distraction from the darkness that lingered. 

Some days and nights, you went out, needing an outside diversion from the thoughts. 

Other times, you stayed in, watching films, talking, training or just... sitting quietly, knowing that the other persons presence was enough protection and reassurance. Words weren’t needed… just company.  

You handed him a drink, plopping down on the end of your bed and you watched him sink into the couch opposite, “Anything you wanna talk about?” 

Since everything with the War, Bucky was working on fitting back into a routine, into ‘normal’ life - or what could be considered normal for people like yourselves. 

He was undergoing his mandatory therapy sessions, and they seemed to be helping him. 

He was back in contact with Sam, and the pair even worked a few jobs together now and then, even if they did bicker like an old married couple - it provided great entertainment when you tagged along. 

He leant back on the couch, settling his left arm across the back. He always looked at home on your floor, relaxed, like his mind could shut off a little. “Nah, I’m okay... Thank you though.” He shot you an easy smile again, one that he probably hadn’t used in.... decades. “What about you? Why are you up so late?”

Mimicking his shrug, you kept your expression neutral, making sure your eyes didn’t drift to that certain drawer, “Rough week. I was reading to try and drift off.” 

“Mmmhm...” Bucky’s hummed response told you instantly that he did not believe you one bit. “What were you reading? Cosmopolitan’s best guide to toys?” That shit eating grin graced his face and he motioned gracefully with his left hand... to the corner of the room. 

The vibrator you’d launched was sitting on the floor, nestled in the rug, the soft mint green silicone practically a beacon. 

Okay. 

Okay…. So. There were two ways you could respond to this. 

Either play it off, deny it and change the subject. 

Or…

Turning back to him, you shrugged again, “Oh, I’ve read that back to front. And made a few additions myself.” You cocked your head, a faint flutter in your belly as you awaited his response. 

The barest flicker of surprise danced across his beautiful, rugged features before dissolving into something confident and smouldering. “Well, it looks to me like their guide isn’t true to review tonight. Something tells me you’re having a little bit of trouble.” His voice had begun to lower into a deeper, the natural roughness of his voice coming out. 

It stoked that fire within you, warming your blood and curling low in your belly. 

“And if I was? What would you suggest to help?” It was almost impossible to remain sitting still as the atmosphere folded and changed. There was one obvious route to your back and forth… and you wanted it. 

Wanted… him.

And if you were honest, you had for a long time now. There was just something about him that you’d always been drawn to, a simmering tension that settled whenever you were together. 

Bucky rose from the sofa in a fluid movement, walking toward you slowly, casually, but with the grace and prowl of a wolf eyeing up its next meal – you. 

And fuck, you wanted him to devour you. 

He slid his hands into his pockets, feet silent on your wooden floor, “Well… I would say that as wonderful as your toys may be… they’re just that. Toys. They can’t… feel what you like.” His eyes burned through you with each of his steps. “They don’t hear the noises you make when they hit the right spot. They don’t get to see the way your body reacts, the way your teeth sink into your bottom lip because it feels overwhelmingly good.” 

He was close enough for you to smell his cologne, and that only added to the growing wetness between your thighs as his filthy, beautiful words. 

Bucky stopped in front of you, removing his left hand and touching his fingers to your chin to tilt it up to face him, “They can’t know the little things… the deeper angle, that extra finger or sweep of the tongue… they can’t make you so wet that it runs down your thighs and they can’t make you arch off the bed as you shatter into starlight…” He sighed softly, shaking his head in mock disappointment, “I’m afraid they just… can’t make you come the way a real person could.” He applied a little pressure to the underside of your chin, and you rose to your – unsteady -  feet instantly, putty in his hands.  

Holy fuck, Bucky Barnes had a mouth on him. 

Your teeth had indeed sunk into your lower lip, and your breathing had grown shallow. It was an effort to keep your thighs firmly locked together… Because you were just as wet as he had said. 

The dark flame in his eyes told you that he knew the reaction you were having to him. He brushed a cool thumb over your lip, then tugged it gently to free it from your teeth and at the same time, he leant his head down to your level, “They can’t make you come like I can, darlin’.” This close, his warm lips brushed the shell of your ear, his voice reduced to a husky rasp that only further drew out that Brooklyn accent. 

The soft moan that left your lips was almost pitiful, but you didn’t care, “Shit.” 

You breathed the word, earning a deep chuckle in your ear before Bucky pulled back, only enough to see your face, “You want me to help you? Give you a helping hand?” His words were low and seductive, but he was looking between your eyes, making no more moves until he knew you wanted this. 

If you changed your mind, he would leave right now, and say no more about it. 

That very thought pained you. 

Something had always hovered between you both… and maybe now was the time to let it out. You shared a few kisses on nights out and he had featured heavily in your fantasies night after night, wishing your fingers were his, the toys were him….

You met his eyes, your own clear and sure and you kept that gaze as you parted your lips. Then swept your tongue along his thumb and tilted your head down just enough to take it between your lips. The vibranium was smooth, cold and it felt oddly delightful on your tongue. “Make me come, Bucky. Prove to me you’re better than the toys.” Your voice was low with need, a soft pleading note for him there as you gazed up through your eyelashes. 

The Arctic blue of his eyes deepened to near midnight, his pupils blowing out as he watched you talk around his thumb, your tongue sweeping over the metal and he almost purred, “Oh, baby, you won’t need toys when I’m done.” And then he was on you. 

He gently pulled his hand from your face, instead placing it lightly around your neck, the heavy metal settling on your collarbones and that alone drenched you. 

He looked between your eyes, checking one final time and then his mouth was lowering onto yours, his lips warm, plush and ever so inviting. Instantly, he licked a teasing line along your lips, which you would have parted for him without the request. 

Bucky’s tongue slipped past your lips, sweeping against yours in hot strokes as he explored every corner of your mouth. 

He tasted divine, and even more so when his thumb lightly tipped your chin back and he traced the tip of his tongue along the roof of your mouth, licking over the ridges and showing you exactly what that tongue could do. 

A groan left your lips, and you slid your hands up his arms to those shoulders, those gorgeous broad shoulders that all you wanted to do was dig your nails into them and use for support as you rode him. 

A deep curl of delight and joy was unfurling within the heat in your belly, because you needed this, needed more of him and his hands and his tongue and his words… and you were finally getting it

Hell, he had only just started kissing you and you already could have fallen apart just from that. 

“Why have we not been doing this all the time?” Was the only thought that your already fuzzy mind could come up with as he pulled away slowly from your lips, only to begin pressing hot, open kisses against your jaw that were all teeth and tongue. He seared a path to your neck, kissing all over until he found that particular spot that made you whimper and arch into his body. 

Bucky laughed low against your neck, the sound vibrating, “Oh, baby, you were struggling, weren’t you? I’ve barely even touched you and you’re already a mess…” He used his hand on your throat to tilt your head to the side, before biting at your skin, sweeping his tongue over the hot and sucking a deep mark there. 

A slight whine rippled in your throat, fingers pulling as his shirt and your chest pushed against his, the firm heat of him making your nipples tighten, especially when he pushed into you. 

Bucky slipped a hand between your bodies, tugging at the cord of your dressing gown and it slipped from your shoulders, leaving you bare and open to him. 

He licked down your neck, his tongue smoothing over the shape of your collarbones and then down your sternum to your breasts. He butterfly kissed the soft flesh, then almost delicately sucked at your rleft nipple, lifting his vibranium hand to squeeze the other, “So beautiful…” He mumbled it half to himself, his dark mussed up curls soft against your skin. 

One of your hands trailed up the back of his neck, slightly tangling in the hair at the base of his head and you pushed your chest further into his mouth, “Tease.” The word was a soft gasp, your eyes closing in pleasure and your lips parting. 

He chuckled, pulling back to blow a cool breath on the wet skin, watching your nipple harden and then he moved to give the other the same treatment, “Oh, I’m a tease, am I? I can stop if you like.” He grinned around the delicate skin, just slightly grazing his teeth as he tugged your nipple and then he continued his trail of kisses down your body, slowly sinking to his knees. “I don’t think you’ll ask me to stop though, darlin’.” His right hand grasped your ankle, and then he ghosted warm fingertips up your leg, past your knee and then pausing at your inner thigh, at what he felt there, “No. No I don’t think you’ll ask me to stop at all.” 

The cocky bastard grinned once more against your stomach, before dipping his tongue inside your belly button.

“Bucky…” You couldn’t hide the whimper in your voice, nor the way your hips rocked forward in a plea. It was almost painful how much you needed him to touch you, needed to feel his lips and his tongue. 

“Shhh, baby, I know.” His hands slipped up your waist, as soothing as his gentle coo against your belly button and then he brushed his lips lower and lower… and then finally, he pressed a soft butterfly kiss to your pubic bone. 

A low groan tore from his throat, his hands digging into the soft flesh of your hips as he saw you, swollen and positively dripping for him, “Oh, darlin’, look at you…” 

The sheer desire and awe in his low voice caused heat to flush along your cheekbones. You weren’t shy by any means, but the almost primal admiration in his voice was something you’d never heard before, the pure want and desire to make you feel good and worship you. 

Bucky admired the sight before him for a single moment, before lifting his eyes to yours and then he dove in, immediately devouring you like he was starving. His deft tongue slipped through your slick folds with ease, and he moaned again at your taste, at your smell, everything. 

He pressed his tongue flat against you before sucking at your clit, with such an intensity that you almost choked. It was a simple movement, but it shot electricity through your body and made every single nerve stand on end. 

He let that coil of energy begin to build, and then he licked back down, his hands sliding down to palm at your ass cheeks before digging his fingers into your skin, pulling you in further so he could bury his nose against your clit and his tongue – fuck, his tongue pushed inside of you, hot and heavy. It just felt so, so good, his nose putting pressure on your bundle of nerves, his tongue pumping inside you. 

Your hands flew down to his hair, winding through it to keep him there, keep him doing that, to keep him fucking you with his tongue, “Buck-”. You weren’t sure what you were begging him for, only that you just needed to say his name, needed to do something. 

Your hips began to rock in time with his thrusts, and you became aware of it only when Bucky’s muffled moan reverberating through you. 

He liked it, no... he loved this, that you were grinding against his face as his tongue worked inside you, tasting parts of you no one else had ever gotten right before. 

“Fuck, Bucky, keep doing that – I’m-” You cut off with a high moan, your head tilting back as you rocked into him faster, chasing down that high that was so tantalisingly close. It hadn’t taken long, you were so worked up from your failed attempts that you were already there. 

Bucky’s began to lick and suck you with new fervour, his head moving in time with the jerks of his hips, feeling the way your walls were tightening around his tongue. His fingers dug harder into your ass, and you felt the silent command almost, Come. 

And you did. 

You cried his name out to the sky, every nerve in your body winding to near painful tautness before you shattered on his face, your first orgasm ripping through you. 

Bucky didn’t stop, working you through it and drawing it out further and further as he lapped up every single drop you gave him, moaning himself like it was the most tantalising thing he had ever tasted. 

He stopped only when your grip released on his hair, the sensitivity of your nerves almost painful, your legs shaking like crazy and he lifted his hand from between your thighs, his lips and chin glistening. He rose from his knees, nudging you back onto the bed and instantly crawling up your body, “You have no idea how good you taste.” 

You whimpered slightly, catching your breath as you watched him crawl up you, eyes burning like sapphire fire, his tongue licking slowly over his lips as he savoured you. Words were beyond you, desire still coursing through your veins and you were a little in awe at how quickly – and hard – he had brought you to your first orgasm. 

Bucky grinned devilishly, “That won’t be your last.” He lowered his mouth back to yours and as you tasted yourself on him, you grew instantly wet for him again. 

His body brushed into yours and you felt how painfully hard he was through his jeans, the sounds and taste of you getting to him of course. 

Your fingers had barely brushed against his restrained length when he shook his head, nipping at your lower lip, “Oh no, baby, this is all about you.” 

You ignored him, palming him through his jeans and he moaned lowly before his eyes flashed, his hand suddenly back on your throat and he moved his hips away so you couldn’t get to him. “I said no.” It was almost a snarl, “This is about you. Not me.” His hand tightened just slightly around your throat, making it that little bit harder to breathe and your eyes rolled back at how delicious it felt. 

It was a huge kink for you, the idea of someone – of Bucky - taking control, being in control of your body even it was just for a little while. You didn’t need to think or do anything. Only feel and be at the mercy of his touch. 

You relented, legs falling open for him and you tilted your head back, searching for his lips. 

Bucky granted you the kiss, a slow, languid kiss at first that was all simmering passion and tangling tongues, the taste on you still lingering on his lips. 

He palmed your breast again, tugging and squeezing the flesh until he scratched his nails lightly down your ribcage and belly. 

Yes, yes-

He wasted no time, no more playing and his fingers slipped lower, circling over your clit with a delicious pressure that had you instantly moaning into his mouth.

He toyed with your clit a little more, before gathering your wetness and then sinking two fingers inside you, pushing all the way into his knuckles, then drawing back out slowly. 

As he withdrew, you moaned long and slow into his mouth and he began a steady rhythm. Pushing and curling his fingers inside you a few steps, then circling and pulling at your clit, ever so subtly switching it up with each pass so you couldn’t predict what he would do.  

It felt amazing, but… there was something still missing. It still wasn’t quite enough to send you over that final edge… it wasn’t what you’d been fantasising about. 

No, it was his left hand. That dark, golden vibranium hand that was currently seated around your throat. 

The knowledge of what it could do, the sheer power in it that could easily crush your windpipe or shatter your jaw with a single flick of his wrist. 

That is what you needed. 

Those cool, powerful fingers inside you, working you over – that was the best toy. 

It was like he could read your mind somehow, or the way your body sung to his tune. He lifted his head, looking down at you with those searing blues and he cocked his head, a slow grin lighting his gorgeous face, “Oh… This-” he scissored his fingers inside you, stretching your walls and ever so slightly brushing up against that spot, “isn’t quite what you want, is it, darlin’?” 

Holy Christ, he was going to destroy you before you even got what you wanted.

You looked up at him, panting, hips rocking to the slower thrust of his fingers and you shook your head.

Bucky swore softly, panting himself and he squeezed your throat once before lifting his fingers, “You want these, don’t you?”

Instead of answering him, you ducked your head, taking his three fingers into your mouth and immediately gliding your tongue around them, up and down in slow, dirty strokes. 

The effect was instantaneous. Bucky’s hips jerked slightly against yours, his mouth parting as he watched you suck his vibranium fingers, hollowing your cheeks, eyes rolling back in your head like… like it was something else entirely. 

He groaned, swore again and then almost ripped his fingers from your mouth and from between your legs at the same time. 

Your entire body mourned the loss, feeling empty, clenching around nothing but mere seconds later, he plunged those three vibranium fingers inside of you, slick with your saliva and how unbelievably wet you were. 

It stung a little, but only added to the feeling as your hips rose off the bed, “Shit, shit-”

They felt… like the best toy you could ever imagine. Smooth, cold, and hard enough that you could feel every faint ridge of the joints as he slid them in and out. You reached out, grabbing his arm with one hand and the bed with the other, needing something to hold onto as instinct took over. Your hips rode upwards, back arching as you rocked his fingers in deeper, feeling them in your spine almost. It was better than you could have imagined. 

Bucky dropped his head to your chest, spreading his mouth over your breast and his other arm slid over your hips, pinning them to the bed so you were forced to take it. “You wanted this, baby… You take it.” He bit down on the soft flesh of your breast before smoothing his tongue over it again, working an alternative rhythm to his fingers and thumb again, so that your brain couldn’t keep up with which one to follow. It knew only the waves of fire singing through your veins.  

Time may have very well dissolved, because you could only feel pleasure, tinged almost with pain. 

The thick, hard stroking of fingers as they stretched and wrecked you. 

The circling, hard-soft-hard pressure of his thumb on your clit. 

The bite of his teeth on your breasts, neck and chest, followed by the wet press of his tongue. 

The way he couldn’t help his hips slightly rocking against your leg. 

This was almost like a fever dream, expect your brain couldn’t have come up with something this mind melting. Not even if you were really, really worked up. 

The noises in the room were absolutely sinful. The unrestrained cries and moans from your lips, Bucky’s groans and his filthy words, the wet pump of his fingers inside you – it was obscene, filthy and completely, painfully mind-blowing. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, Bucky, please-” You had no idea what you were begging for, but every single nerve and muscle in your body was coiling tighter and tighter, your hips jerking against his arm as he pinned you down, forcing you to take this, to feel everything he was doing with no relenting. Tears were beginning to blur your eyes and the pleasure he unleashed upon you was almost painful. 

Bucky somehow moved his fingers harder, deeper, the ability of the tech in his arm allowing him to do so, “Let go, baby, come on, let it go for me..” He dropped his head, biting down on your neck and he pressed his fingers against that spot inside you, flicking your clit with his thumb and then it all just snapped. 

Waves and waves of hot fire flooded your body, dragging you up to the stars, further. It ripped the air from your lungs, made you half scream his name in a never-ending prayer. 

It just didn’t stop. 

Bucky kept moving inside you, drawing out every single second of your mind-shattering orgasm, letting go of your hips so you could grind them into his hand. “That’s it, baby… Look at you, so beautiful like that…” His praise spurred you on, making you feel almost like a goddess as you flooded his hand. 

He stopped only when you slumped back onto the bed, sucking in deep breaths as you tried to piece yourself back together. 

Better than toys indeed. 

~~

A little while later, you stirred from a light dose to see Bucky lounging on your couch again, cleaning the grooves and metal of his fingers with a soft cloth. 

The sight of him concentrating, taking such care and detail with the clean-up, the cleanup from the mess you had made, had you instantly wet again. “Bucky.” 

He looked up, hearing the low thrum to your voice and a smirk crossed his lips. 

You had a favour to repay for his helping hand, after all. 

[akalegos]

Zero Rewrite AU

Hey so uhhh you know that rvb:zero rewrite au I sometimes post/draw/talk about? Aha,, I have a semi-finished (public copy) doc all about it now!

I'll be updating it semi-frequently whenever I get the chance! The doc so far has some stuff, criticism, info about the AU as a whole. Right now it only has chapter/episode 1 and a partially finished ep2. It's all very self-indulgent and my opinion type beat but hey maybe someone will enjoy it? Idk. It's a serotonin boost and a fun lil side project for me and I like sharing that kinda stuff aaaaa

anyway I hope those curious/ppl who want to find out what in the hell I've been talking about can enjoy it!

Episode 01: Viper Overview: Introduction to “Viper”.

The episode starts with Carolina and Tucker discussing dinner while walking out of Chorus’ General Hospital (the same one Wash was admitted to). They walk towards a corner alleyway as Tucker tries to contact Iris/Grif to get them a ride home.

Carolina: “Well we can get our dinner quicker, once you call Grif”

Tucker: “I know! He’s just not getting my calls.”

Tucker struggles for a while more trying to get in call with Grif, or even sending him a message. He sighs.

Carolina: “No signal?”

Tucker: “Yup. Signal’s down here too.”

Carolina sighs as well.

Carolina: “I don’t suppose we have enough pocket change for a motel?”

Tucker: “Oh I’m sure we will if we share a bed. Bow ch-”

Carolina: “Don’t push it, Tucker.”

Tucker mumbles the rest to himself as he tries to contact Grif again. Carolina looks around the alley as she waits. Getting a little impatient, Carolina tries to suggest moving to a different location.

But before she can finish her sentence, she calls out to Tucker as she pulls him out of the way from an oncoming knife.

Tucker: “Hey-! What the fuck!”

Carolina lets go of Tucker, turning around to see who the attacker was, with Tucker following her lead.

In front of them was someone in black and pink armour, admiring the same knife that was thrown at Tucker. She turns her attention to them, pointing the knife at Tucker.

???: “You. The key, hand it over.”

She calmly says as she slowly walks towards the two. Carolina slowly puts herself in front of Tucker, realising the situation they’re in.

Carolina: “You’ll have to get through me first.”

???: “Agent Carolina. An honour to meet you.”

Carolina: “What? Do you want an autograph?”

???: “No need. I do have a present for you though.”

A blue small lightning flash appears right next to the attacker, another person in black and blue armour appears. With the rising danger, Carolina motions for Tucker to leave.

While Tucker slowly sneaks off, Carolina grabs hold of her pistol.

Carolina: “I think I’ll have to decline.”

Carolina and the attacker banter for a bit. The one in black and blue notices Tucker leaving before unsheathing his own knife and tossing it in front of Tucker. He appears before him, making Tucker jump back, confusing him.

???: “Going somewhere?”

Tucker: “How- You were just- How the hell-”

Carolina, noticing the attacker’s partner's disappearance, calls out to Tucker again. Pulling and dragging him away from the two as they flee.

[Insert fight scene here of Tucker and Carolina fighting the two, fighting to the best of their abilities despite limited weapons, making use of the garbage bin lids. In the end, they are able to escape intact -- though Carolina does sprain her arm -- after running into a public area.]

Tucker: “Did… Did we lose them?”

Carolina: “Looks like it.”

The two find themselves in the busy night market of Chorus.

Tucker: “So…” *pant* “Wanna get some dinner?”

Carolina: “Honestly, I could go for a drink…. But we should report this to Kimball first.”

Carolina walks into the crowd, looking for the Capitol where they could find Kimball.

Tucker: “Seriously? No-” *pant* “-dinner?”

Carolina: “We can get some later.”

Tucker grunts, following Carolina who's already looking for a cab.

[Fast forward Kimball’s office]

An assistant opens the door for the two, Kimball’s still in her office, packing up, looking like she’s about to finish for the night.

Assistant: “President Kimball, you have some guests.”

Kimball: “Not right now I’m-”

Kimball looks up to see Carolina and Tucker, in an instant, she almost drops the paper in her hands, quickly trying to calm herself and be more ‘presentable’. She dismisses the assistant and invites the two in.

Kimball: “Carolina-! Tucker… Ahem, now what do I owe to this unexpected visit?”

Carolina: “Wish we could have met on more, positive terms but, we just got attacked.”

Kimball: “Oh…”

Kimball slides down into her chair. Sighing.

Kimball: “I’m sorry… Crime has been a bit rampant, to say the least.”

Tucker: “Yeah, you wouldn’t happen to have a phone here? We couldn’t get a signal anywhere.”

Kimball: “It won’t work. Communications have just been cut off.”

Carolina: “What?”

Kimball explains that most of the communication towers have been hijacked and that they’re sending a team to check it out tomorrow morning. She offers to provide a couple of rooms at the military site for the time being. Carolina shoots Tucker a look, and Tucker sighs, hanging his head down.

Tucker: “We’re-”

Carolina: “Could we join the team?”

Kimball: “A-are you sure? You’ve already done so much for Chorus, I-”

Tucker: Begrudgingly “We insist.”

Carolina: “It sounds like our attackers are linked to this case. We might as well join now.”

Kimball nods.

Kimball: “Well… Let me show you where you’ll be staying. The team will meet you at 0700 sharp.”

[ END ]

[whump-town]

Was Hotch Abused?

I offer you my 2,300+ worded thoughts on the matter with episodes included. There's going to be lots and lots of talk about abuse so you're going to want to steer clear of that if that's something you're not cool with but for those of you interested... I give you all the proof I could think of:

Natural Born Killer.

In the eighth episode of the first season, “Natural Born Killer”, we meet Vincent Perrotta. His father was abusive but from the outside looking in, no one knew a thing. Perrotta started drinking at fourteen and committed petty crimes, as well as assault, for pleasure. Going as far as to kill his own father not too long after. But Perrotta is a monster and a psychopath so it’s clear we’re not supposed to sympathize which makes his interaction with Hotch so peculiar.

Hotch is our “Captain America”. A true neutral with an infinity for doing what’s right so it’s inconceivable to compare him to Perrotta and yet Hotch gives us some rather conflicting lines to dissect.

Before Gideon hands the interview over to Hotch, he spends a moment talking with the others out in the bullpen. The whole time he’s leaned back and he’s watching Morgan and Hotch. Now, at this point, we don’t know about the sexual abuse Derek Morgan faced at the hands of Carl Buford but there’s something about the way that Gideon spends the entirety of the conversation only looking at the two of them. Waiting for them to put together what he clearly already has and when Hotch does…

Hotch jumps straight into Perrotta’s profile, asking: “You grew up in a house that looked normal and happy, didn’t you Vincent?”, “But your father beat you every chance he got”

Perrotta excuses it with a shrug, “he smacked me around some, didn’t everybody’s old man?”

Abuse is a complicated thing and, often, abused children just don’t know what their parents are doing to them is abuse. It can be a subtle and outright thing but there’s an element of normalcy to it. The parent’s abuse is as habitual, as minimal as biting your nails to the child. Adults often can’t identify their parent’s past abuse.

With Hotch you learn that his lack of expression is often as telling as his expressions and as Hotch looks back at Perrotta, there’s something so sad about his eyes. His voice goes from loud, assertive to his whispered answer to Perrotta’s question. “No.” As if, well, maybe that’s a question he’d raised once too.

Perrotta doesn’t care about that though and he taunts “well, maybe if yours had you would have learned to fight”. But is it not more telling that Hotch didn’t make a sound? Perrotta got in several hits and the only sound Hotch made was when the wind was literally punched out of him. Not even when Gideon called to him and at that point, Perrotta did not the garrote around Hotch’s throat. That’s another thing mentioned before in the profile and something Hotch mentions to Perrotta directly. You learn to take the beatings, smile even. So, it’s just a little odd how little Hotch responded…

But that’s all nothing, you can take that how you want

Which leads us to the fateful, not everyone comment.

"You were just responding to what you learned, Vincent. When you grow up in an environment like that, an extremely abusive and violent household... it's not surprising that some people grow up to become killers"

That can’t mean NOTHING, there’s so much there but there’s something about Hotch’s subtle wording. The way he’s unconsciously slipped himself in there (a very real thing that people do) and he hasn’t even realized it. Doesn’t even know he’s done it until Perrotta pushes and he pauses, asks what Perrotta means. And the subtly of it, the way he doesn’t even mean to that says more than anything else.

“And some people grow up to catch them.”

It’s a super-specific comment to make. He can’t possibly be talking about Derek because he doesn’t even know about Carl Buford yet not to mention saying that about him would be incredibly rude if he were talking about Reid (and again, he doesn’t know about Reid’s childhood yet). So… that really only leaves him because JJ, Garcia, and Elle were not abused.

“P911”

In season two, episode two “P911” the team is hunting down a man trying to sell a young boy, Peter, on the black market. Kevin Rose is an underage boy “selling” himself on the internet while his abusive father has been in prison. I’ll let you just guess who it is that leads the team on finding out more about Kevin.

Your guess is more than likely right-- Morgan and Hotch. Now, we know about Morgan but come on. Nothing to say about it being Hotch who makes the emotional appeal?

The camera even follows his gaze, he’s crouched down (to appear non-threatening because he’s so close) and we watch his eyes take in the scars on Kevin’s chest. You can also note that while Gideon remarks that Kevin’s father was “always drunk, you never knew why he was hurting you, why he was so angry” both Kevin and Hotch look away from him.

AND FUCKING TRY AND TELL ME THE “some grow up to catch them” LINE WAS NOTHING TRY BECAUSE GUESS WHAT GIDEON SAYS? NO, NO GUESS--

Gideon: “At night you’d cry yourself to sleep hoping someone would come and save you”

And it’s HOTCH, HOTCH IS THE ONE TO SAY: “You have the chance to be the one who saves someone, Kevin. You can be the one who answers him, the one who stops his pain.”

PARALLELS PEOPLE THE PARALLELS

“Profiler, Profiled”

I bet you weren’t expecting this one, huh? But there’s something about people who faced trauma that makes it so perceptible to other traumatized people-- they sniff it out like coke to a drug hound. And, just guess, who it is that spends the majority of his time fighting with Morgan? Who knows (like I said about the bloodhound) immediately there is something Morgan’s hiding.

Hotch is angry, he’s upset that Morgan would hide anything. Mumbling about there being “larger implications” and how the team can’t have secrets. With the knowledge of exactly what that secret is it makes Gideon’s eye roll a little telling. Because it’s like they both know but neither will say. Driven home by Gideon turning the attention to Hotch, asking “would you want us profiling you?”

And again Hotch is the one to leap onto the abuse. The one to put the pieces together. Hotch’s anger makes no sense. He says he’s angry that Derek’s keeping a secret but the team has many, way too many. Over the years the team unwraps all kinds of secrets, he’s never angry then. So, it’s not about the implication of a secret at all. It’s what the secret is, like misplaced anger. Anger with himself may be leftover from his own abuse. But still…

Hotch lets Morgan escape. Knows exactly who and what Carl Buford is but all he tells the team is that “he won’t even speak about him”. He always knows how to find the abuse… like I said, a bloodhound.

George Foyet

I know you’re going to find this so fucking surprising but guess who also was abused? George Foyet was beaten by his biological father and his mother didn’t save him so he hates women (bleh, men are disgusting what’s knew).

Now, blah, blah, blah Hannah, I know you’re not about to say Foyet and Hotch are a lot alike-- no of course not. Don’t be silly. What I’m going to say is that they’re foil characters? They accent one another in an opposites sort of way. Foyet is a manipulative narcissist who doesn’t work well with others. Hotch is a guilt-ridden team leader who can’t let The Reaper’s case go. There are meant to be comparisons drawn between them. A good villain does that. George Foyet shows us that Hotch is not at all this removed, cool guy that we’ve previously assumed him to be. He cries in an alley because he blames himself when The Reaper kills a busload of people.

We see he has a rather compulsive nature. He never let The Reaper case go and has very personal ties in this case. Not even after Foyet attacks him, if anything it’s worse. He brings the case file home.

But it’s certainly interesting to see yet another “villain” with that same tragic abusive father and submissive mother come into play with Hotch. We’re nearing a point where it’s getting hard to call it coincidence (and according to David Rossi, there simply is not such thing).

Haunted.

In the second episode of the fifth season, “Haunted”, Hotch voice’s over a Dickinson quote: “One need not be a chamber to be haunted, One need not be a house; The brain has corridors surpassing. Material place.” These quotes are often cheesy, if not a little cliché, but given the premise of this episode is in exploring the ways in which a man’s traumatic childhood has left him now grappling for a truth he can not define… well, maybe we can say the writers were onto something here.

Darrin Call, debatably the Unsub of “Haunted”, was abused by an alcoholic father. We see several signs of it throughout the episode-- Darrin’s delayed speech & severe neglect that leaves Darrin in dirty, hole-riddled clothing. If what we see is not enough, the reports that the team is given on Darrin explicitly state that he was extremely physically abused. It is this abuse that leads to the PTSD that he’s diagnosed with.

As sad and disheartening as Darrin Call’s life is, overall it’s the sort of episode that is forgotten over time. When it’s placed right after the episode that viewers have to watch Hotch say goodbye to Haley and Jack then, who is Darrin Call when compared to the agony of watching Hotch show genuine weakness? After watching Hotch lay in a hospital bed, tears in his eyes wondering if his son will remember him? His fears become our own and after watching George Foyet disarm and mutilate the one guy we’ve been led to believe for five seasons is infallibly, unflinchingly never going to break… well, Darrin Call has it bad but our focus is elsewhere.

It’s on Hotch, right?

The guy who is coming back to the job after only a month (and a day) off to recover. Who Morgan worries might have PTSD but he knows they can’t easily measure because Hotch wrote the questionnaire, he knows all the right answers. Who we see has had new locks installed since the attack and has Foyet’s file sitting open on a table for easy access. Who hears Darrin Call’s life (worked the same job without promotion for years before getting fired, no wife, no kids, a hermit) and bluntly asks why Darrin hasn’t just killed himself.

And let’s just take a moment to break down that comment. Hotch, who in the episode previously lost his wife and child, wants to know why a man who is steadily starting to sound a lot like him hasn’t just killed himself.

And I don’t say “sounds a lot like him” lightly.

Darrin Call has PTSD. Hotch, more than likely, has PTSD

Here are some signs just from that episode: hostility (he yelled at Garcia over something very small), self-destructive behavior (he ran into Darrin Call’s father’s house without a vest, back-up, or telling the other’s what he was doing), and guilt (blamed himself for missing the eye twitching Darrin exhibited because of his years of antipsychotic use)

Darrin Call was abused… this marks the second HEAVILY implied time that Hotch has been compared to another man abused by his father

Vincent Perrotta was the first with that hard to forget the exchange

George Foyet and his notably exactly the same past as Perrotta

“Haunted” feels like it’s supposed to prove to the audience that Hotch is losing it. He distances himself from Morgan, leaving every room that Morgan is in. He doesn’t pick up Garcia’s calls after Darrin Call attacks his therapist. The only glimpse we see of the old Hotch is with Emily, pulled to the side, but his guilt burns and he even brushes her off. Shaking his head and turning his back to her because somehow he should have seen something no one else did.

Throw in Reid’s comment about Call “victims are often drawn to the scene of their first trauma” and we’re painfully reminded of Hotch’s apartment. A place you’d think he’d want to escape but didn’t. The man was stabbed nine times in his own apartment and stayed in that same place. Almost sounds like that statement could be applied to Hotch too.

A dash of Hotch’s own comment about where Call would go to in his confusion and he says “to what he knows”, even the importance of how that orphanage is “where he became Darrin Call”. Where does Hotch go? What does Hotch know? The job.

So… we tally now three total Unsubs that Hotch has this direct relationship with. Three Unsubs with abusive fathers and mothers who couldn’t protect them. Hmm… coincidence?

Brothers Hotchner

Supervisor Special Agent Hotchner is a master of hiding, that is undeniable. It’s hard to see anything behind those furrowed brows and impersonal suits and that’s likely for a reason. However, anyone with a little sibling can tell you that no one on this Earth can and will annoy the ever-loving shit out of you like a sibling.

But that’s not really important. Sean and Hotch don’t talk about their parents. At all. Ever.

Hotch says that when Sean was in the first grade he got sent off to boarding school. “I was the screw-up making bad choices”. Interesting enough of a statement to make but you throw in the rough ages of Sean and Hotch at that time and it’s a little more than just “interesting”. You have Hotch at roughly 14-15 getting into trouble just like Morgan did at that same age (coincidence???).

(now you can certainly look at Hotch’s parentification vs. Sean’s immaturity doubled with substance abuse problems but we’d be stretching. “The Tribe” touches on the parentification but Sean just calls it “the big brother” thing and tells Hotch that he’s not Sean’s father and it’s fine it’s whatever. Hotch is a bit pushy. That’s not new. Substance abuse can just be a problem, it doesn’t have to be bc they were abused but again… a little coincidental)

So... was Aaron Hotchner abused as a child? I certainly think so

[bookdork1]

It’s just wild that cons have this stigma against bringing up destiel!!!!! It’s literally insane!!! Ships are the rallying points for most other fandoms!!! Ships are pretty inarguably the thing that brings in new fans and keeps them around!!!! Ships are what everybody else uses to market a show to their audience!!!!!!!!! Yet this show always tries to push its biggest ship soo far out of the picture like “there is no gay in ba sing se”!!!!! And it’s!!! Madness!!!!!!!!!! Why do they care if we ask Jensen or Misha about destiel!!??!?? Why do they screen questions to avoid this!!!??! Why was there a gag order on the actors to not talk about it!!!????!?Especially now! The show is over!!!! You really think the majority of people shelling out money for these things aren’t hellers already lost to the void!!???!! Destiel shipperss are proven time and again the biggest subsection of this fandom and yet!!!!! Treated like we are trying to start a discussion on the pros of the Black Death or the Spanish Inquisition any time someone attempts to ask the people involved with making the show What Exactly Is All This Then!!!

Anyways my point is the stigma about not bringing up destiel at cons is dumb as fuck and I’m ranting because I’m thinking about them censoring the comments and questions the actors get to see at this con run by the cw. By all means censor the inappropriate or inane questions but when your entire final season hinges on the relationship dynamic between two characters who most definitely were NOT the brothers (did they even have any significant brother scenes this season besides flashback episode and horrid death scene no one shall name??) maybe let us ask questions about it!!!! This is not difficult!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[thunderheadfred]

🤚The Second Worst (Pt. 1/?)🤚

Part 2 of my Shigaraki Thesis Headcanons. HC's // The Second Worst: 1 - 2

The half-mad ghost of Shimura Tenko is in love with you, and your life is about to become a tragic wreck. -- AKA here's when I gave up on bullet points and went off the fuckin rails

I'm self-conscious about writing so much, so uhhhh, please be kind, hahaaa. This is rather long and involved. Are these still even HCs or just a self-indulgent AU outline? There are some mysteries we may never solve.

This is on AO3 now, if you prefer reading there. Anyway. Minors do not interact.

- - - - -

You met Tenko before the League existed.

Believe it or not, there are a million ways it might have happened, but in the end: you were both bargain-binning in Akihabara.

You reached for a copy of a collectible bullet-hell cute-'em-up (near-mint! CIB!!!) and accidentally bonked hands with a complete stranger. He flinched about five million feet away from you. Ouch. You're just a nobody, quirkless and average, but you didn't think you were THAT repulsive.

(You're not. Hell, even if you were, this guy couldn't care less. He barely registers that you have a face.)

(Shigaraki is accustomed to getting in and out of this shop in seconds. He always comes in before anyone else and goes straight home. -- Is that really home? Is 'home' a real place? -- ANYWAY he's already pirated this shit, god, why does he even care? He doesn't need to be here. Father doesn't like it. Is that why he's here? Just to do something Father doesn't like? That's pathetic.)

He's had at least ten complete internal arguments with himself before he so much as looks at you.

You know in the tenth of a second he actually meets your eyes... this fucker is going to fight you to the death over this game.

- - - The death match ends in a draw. He was not expecting you to know the first fucking thing about this game. Nobody knows about it, even in Japan. Who the fuck do you even think you are? Oh, no, he's still taking it. But... maybe he can show you how to play it it. He'll give you a little taste, just to make you jealous. He's got his hoodie pulled down like he's going to commit an act of terrorism. What little you can see of his face looks twitchy and messed up. If you have any survival instincts at all, they're kicking in right about now. But... why not. You're not going anywhere with this dude unsupervised, so you suggest a crowded web cafe down the street. The cafe has the necessary console... but the retro gaming booth is laughably small. The TV is about four inches across and you end up having to practically sit in his lap. You were sure this guy was a nasty fucking creep, but he's................ only mostly terrible. Way too angry, for sure. Has no idea how to have a normal, friendly conversation. Inadvertently insults you every other sentence and seems to have a deep-seated persecution complex.

You'd prefer to be mad about the awful company, but... he's obviously deprived of human contact. When it's established that you two share a lot of media fixations, he calms down and starts treating you a little more like a human being. Or at least like a fellow elite.

Wherever he came from, he doesn't seem to want to go back. He keeps pushing you to play one more level, pretending he wants to beat your score. You feel kinda bad for him. You get the distinct feeling that his life is a disaster. He looks like he's never had a full night of sleep in his life. He trips your trigger hairs in that 'is he gonna follow me home?' kind of way, but... up close, he's a lot more depressing than scary. At the very least, you want to buy him a stupidly cute dessert. Just... as thanks. For letting you try out the game and stuff. It's not a big deal, so just pick a flavor, okay? The world isn't actually that awful, y'know.

It's not even that impressive... Definitely not a great cafe. But he takes practically a full hour to eat a single slice of strawberry cake.

When the hoodie comes down. He's all shriveled and dried out, like someone left him him in the desert to die. He chews on his peeling bottom lip and nervously scratches his neck. He doesn't thank you for the cake. Which is fine. It's not a big deal. Actually, you wish he would eat faster; you feel weirdly responsible for him now.

Under all that mess he's... gorgeous? His hair is stunning: a bright, gleaming silver that catches the light. His bone structure is flawless. If it weren't for all the scars and the misanthropic slouch, he'd look like a fairy fucking prince.

You were not prepared for that. In another life he could have been a model, the type of guy who would never even look at you. But something bad happened to him. Something... very bad. Do you even want to know? You have no idea how to ask. Has anyone ever been nice to him? It doesn't seem like it. Should YOU be nice to him? You sort of want to try. - - - This becomes a regular thing. This weird little secret. You should probably tell someone when you see him, just in case you don't come back one day, but you say nothing; how the hell would you explain why you want to see him so bad? You don't know his full name. Maybe he's on a watch list. When he gives you a long string of random numbers so you can schedule meet-ups (is THAT his e-mail, really?) he tells you to just... call him Tenko. Or whatever. It doesn't matter. (He sneaks out when Father is deep in his plots. As long as he comes home on time, it doesn't really matter where he goes, right?) He brings a different game every time. He has an insane collection. Where does he get the money for all this? You know he doesn't work. God, is it drugs? It's probably drugs. Wherever these hidden gems came from, he proudly shows them off to you, like he's never had an audience before. It's sort of cringe-inducing, the way he one-ups and rubs every little victory in your face, desperate for attention.

But at the same time, you are becoming too... something...to mind. Do you... like him? He's not funny, but he thinks you are. His mouth is huge when he laughs. He seems to hate everyone but you, and you've had to earn the distinction of being merely tolerable. Still, he gets really excited about random shit like the garage kit black market and haunted dolls and the price of weed on the dark web.

And... strawberry cake. The realization hits you both at the same time when the waitress brings one piece with two forks. God, what the fuck, are you... are you dating? Quick, think. You look forward to seeing him, and don't even mind sitting close to him anymore. Sometimes you push your leg up against him just to see if he'll still flinch away... and he doesn't.

You jealously notice the way he touches everything but you: with delicate precision, one finger at a time. His large, elegant hands always have a pinky up like he's aspiring for a fiefdom, and you wonder what his skin feels like. You go home and dwell on the way he plucks flowering weeds out of the pavement in front of the cafe. The way he stands rooted to the spot as you leave, just... looking at nothing, unsmiling.

You watch his lips too much, and not just because you want to buy him chapstick. You catch him gaping at you all the time. You thought he was just creepy like that, but maybe... Yeah. I guess you are dating him. Shit. - - - Okay, so, yeah. Bringing him back to your place was definitely a bad idea. You know you shouldn't trust him, even if he is... apparently... your boyfriend? Sort of? You still don't have his phone number. So. Um. What now? You order overpriced pizza and queue up a campy horror movie. What the fuck are you even doing. You don't really think he's going to murder you anymore, but... still. Is the suburban massacre scene gonna give him ideas? Turns out, no. He doesn't like gore, even when the blood is neon pink. He gets upset. Like, really upset. Shaky and green, like he might puke on you. He can't stop scratching that scaly spot on his neck.

Tenko, are you crying? Fucking hell, did you just trigger him? Of course he has a traumatic past, it's carved all over his face. You're so fucking stupid. You don't know how to make it right. You want to hug him, kiss him... anything. But he's never really touched you, and you're too afraid to push now. It ruins the whole night. He leaves without explaining anything. Doesn't even say goodbye. He just. Leaves. Maybe you'll never see him again. Maybe that's for the best. Your chest hurts. - - - He shows up at your door a few weeks later. You haven't heard from him since that disastrous movie night. You had pretty much accepted that you'd broken up with a boyfriend you never actually had. But no. Apparently not.

This time, he’s brought his own entertainment. He's holding a boxed set of some show you're not familiar with. You're distracted by these weird little half-gloves he's wearing, like a cyberpunk hacker. That's a new look, and even if it's a bit edgelord adjacent, he makes it look cool. You tell him as much. It's the first time you've let on how attractive you find him. He's wearing a tight black shirt with a deep, deep V-neck. That's distracting too.

He clears his slender throat and doesn't look at you.

You try to apologize for before, but he's acting like it never happened. What are you even talking about? Have you seen this OVA or not? Get out of the way and let him in already. You've watched three episodes now, but you still have no idea what this stupid anime is about. You can't pay attention to a single frame. All you can think about is how his arm has crept up behind your shoulders. A few inches more and he'll be holding you. Does he... want to hold you? You lean toward him so slowly your spine creaks. One molecule at a time. After a thousand years, your head slides nervously under his chin. His arm comes down, locking you in, fingers clutching your sleeve in a death grip. Even that snobby little pinky. His head tucks down into you hair. A sharp collarbone bites into your cheek. His heartbeat is hard, fast, and irregular. There's not a scrap of fat on him, and as you wrap your arm around his stomach, you think you see a twitch in his pants. Is that just you being desperate? Or... hopeful? This is really happening. --- Soon, you learn that Tenko is a clumsy kisser. It doesn't matter; the fact that he's kissing you at all is good enough for now. His lips are dry, but not half as dry as you expected. There's a slick of menthol helping things along; he's been using something medicated on his lips. Plus, his mouth tastes like he drank a gallon of mouthwash.

All this thrills you more than a little, because it means he came here wanting to impress you. Wanting you. Full stop. Underneath that minty sting is a strange, worrisome aftertaste, like something rotten. Your brain fires off an alarm. Stop kissing him. Right now. This thing will make you sick. But his hands nervously slide over your body... and you decide not to worry about it. Instead, you kiss him deeper. He makes a sweet, startled little noise. Your brain is a fucking liar. It occurs to you he's probably never done this before.

When you lace your fingers in his and try to pull one of his gloves off, he rips his hand away.

Don't. That’s the only explanation he gives.

No need to ask if it's a quirk thing or a trauma thing. Judging by how jittery he gets, it's probably both. You remember the way his hands almost float over objects without ever holding them. Maybe his touch is dangerous. Maybe that's why his face looks like that.

Maybe you should learn more about him before things go way too far...

No. It can't be that bad. Now that he's in your arms, everything frightening about him evaporates. He's vulnerable. He's alone. He's shaking a little. Has anyone else ever seen this side of him? You want to keep him all to yourself, just like this.

So what if he has to touch you with gloves on? You've heard of worse quirk-related inconveniences.

It's okay, Tenko. Do you want to keep going?

You put his hands back on you and wait for him to kiss you again. It doesn't take long.

---

You open his pants. He's long and thin, calloused even here. Every part of him feels untouched, unloved. You hold him tight and squeeze.

It doesn't seem to occur to him to please you in return. He looks afraid. Confused. You're sure you scared him earlier with the glove thing. Is this too much? No. He gasps and leans into you. The tiniest, broken please.

He cums in your hand right away, face buried in your shoulder, his eyes wet and hidden.

I have to go, he says. Over and over and over.

It's okay, Tenko.

You know he doesn't want to.

- - - - - (oops I wrote more)

[tinyboxxtink]

"Weird Secret Friends" *Chapter 14*

Chapter 13

Chapter 15

This chapter literally took me all day, and it's kinda super long, but since I'm only going to 15 it had to be done. Also, I wanted to get a certain part and all the bullshit detail action needs to be written before we get there so I just kept writing to get there. Lulz.

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@mrsrafaelbarba

Okay and can I just say about the Goodbye Love thing it was in my head since I had her say "I need to go away".

This was supposed to be the preview:

Mimi Please don't touch me Understand I'm scared I need to go away

Mark I know a place - a clinic

Benny A rehab?

Mimi Maybe - could you?

Benny I'll pay

And this is for chapter 15: Mimi Goodbye love Goodbye love Came to say goodbye, love, goodbye Just came to say Goodbye love Goodbye love Goodbye love Hello disease....

*DUN DUN DUNNNN*

---------------------

The next thing you knew you were waking up in another room. This one was more lavish and beautiful; the sunset was peeking through green silk curtains with a matching chaise lounge. You were now in pink silk pajamas as opposed to a hospital gown, and you weren’t hooked up to near as many wires. Just a pack attached to your arm linked to your sides.

“What the…?” You cautiously crept out of bed, examining the room.

So many questions flew through your mind at that moment. How did you get here? Where exactly were you? Who the hell changed you while you were passed out? It was too much to imagine. You walked over to the full length mirror and examined yourself. You were still semi pale, but you looked pretty damn good for just having surgery this morning.

You walked back towards your bed where your phone was laying on the nightstand. You went to check your messages when you saw the date-- it had been three days. THREE DAYS?

“What the actual fuck--?” You muttered.

Were you in a Black Mirror episode? How did you lose three whole days of your life?! You began to panic, making you pace the room. Wasn’t there a button you could do? You quickly looked around the room for anything, but all you found was a TV remote.

“Oh are you fucking--” You started to curse the world when you saw a little drawing of a nurse on one of the buttons. You frantically pushed it until a girl who looked like she was a nurse out of a porno as opposed to a hospital came running in.

“Oh my god, I thought you were like, dying or something,” She rolled her eyes and twirled her hair like she was a teenage stereotype.

“Where the hell am I? Why am I---”

“Okay you need to like, chill babe,” Nurse Betty put her hands up. “

“I’m not your babe, mmkay pumpkin? We are not friends,” You pushed her hands down. “Now why don’t you get your little chart and explain to me what’s going on in the Twilight Zone?”

“Alright, well--” She whipped out a mini tablet from her scrubs and flipped through it. “You got here three days ago with an order to keep you in a medically induced coma-- Ooooh, wow that sounds like some soap opera shit. Where your organs harvested on the black market?”

“WHAT?” You grabbed the tablet. That DID sound like some soap opera shit. “You read the tablet, all it said was the details about the coma and then FILES SEALED.

“Can you-- unlock this, please?” You shoved the tablet back in her hands.

“Um no, you need a supervisor for that babe,”

“Can you please get someone to unlock this then, BABE?” Your eye began to twitch from stress.

“Yeah, sure I’ll try,” She shrugged and walked back out of the room. You continued to pace faster now, googling “HARVESTED ORGANS ON THE BLACK MARKET”, when a doctor came in wearing navy blue scrubs, looking like Derek Shepherd.

“Well hey there, beautiful,” He grinned at you.

“...What is happening?” You muttered, staring at him. He was gorgeous, you’d probably be more flustered if you weren’t so freaked out and pissed off.

“What kind of soap opera hospital is this?!” You scowled.

“Hey, just because we take care of ourselves around here doesn’t mean it’s Grey’s Anatomy up here,” He made a face.

“...Could’ve fooled me, McDreamy,”

“....Just because my name is Derek doesn’t mean I’m that tool,” He frowned.

“Oh my god you’re kidding me right?” You had to laugh at the irony.

“You’re probably just grumpy because you haven’t eaten for three days,” He patted your head. “How about a nice filet mignon?”

“Wha…?” You looked around the room in disbelief. “How about you tell me where I am and how I got here?”

“You’re at Whistling Pines Hospital and Rehabilitation Center in Hartford Connecticut, Miss Y/N,”

“Connecticut?!” You gasped. “Sonny said it was just upstate New York. Jesus Christ he sent me out of state?!”

“Calm yourself,” Derek put a hand on your shoulder. “We’re basically on the state line, Mr. Carisi didn’t send you to Siberia,”

“...And why exactly was I brought here against my will?” You crossed your arms.

“Against your will?” He snorted. “Your paperwork says you requested to be out while you recovered so you wouldn’t be tempted to ask for pain meds or anything. Part of the detox, you understand,”

“Detox?” Your face scrunched. “Seriously? So...so now what, you escort me down to the padded room now that I’m healed?”

“No, no of course not,” He shook his head. “Our rehab rooms are much nicer than this. And yours is all ready for you,”

“....Yeah, alright,” You shrugged, looking around the room.

“Wonderful,” He gave you another 100 watt smile before opening the door and motioning you to follow him. You walked for a while through what seemed like a normal hospital wing, then you came to two large doors that said “REHABILITATION WING”.

Derek opened it and let you go through first, into a beautiful lobby. The walls were made of marble, there was a koi pond with a waterfall in the middle of it, sparkling water stations next to big leather chairs. It was like a spa.

“Wow...” You whispered as you admired it while you walked.

“Yes, I know,” He chuckled. “It’s quite impressive, isn’t it?”

“Yeah…” You began to feel guilty; how much was this costing Sonny? This place looked like it cost the down payment on a house to stay in. You followed Derek down a hallway that looked like a hotel room hallway more than a rehab center, until he stopped at a door labelled 312.

“Ah here we are,” He opened the door and let you go inside first once again. It was an even more lavish room than you woke up in. A nice king bed with fluffy pillows and silk comforters were covered with extra blankets if you needed them. There was a huge sofa in front of a large screen TV, and a little kitchenette with a small fridge, cabinets, a dishwasher, and a microwave.

“....Wow,” You continued to stare in awe at the luxurious amenities this place had.

“Indeed,” Derek smiled. “Now, the TV comes loaded with digital cable and all the streaming services. Our WIFI password is LIVELAUGHLOVE, the fridge is stocked with organic, healthy foods only, but if you’d like to request something you can give our front desk a ring,”

You just nodded as you checked out the room.

“Now,” He cleared his throat. “For the icky part,”

“...The icky part?” You sputtered with a sarcastic smile. “Where did you go to medical school, Sesame Street?”

“Ha ha,” He rolled his eyes. “You will need to stay in your room at all times unless it’s social time, or group time. We do have several common areas such as a pool and a gym, but you’ll need to schedule times to use them, you can’t just walk around on your own,”

“Ah,” You nodded. “So it is a prison, just a very nice prison,”

“It’s not a prison, Miss Y/N,” He shook his head. “Not for you, anyway,”

“Really? Because it sounds like--”

“Your cousin did pay for your residency here, but you’re not under a court order or anything so you’re not confined here. Most of our residents have to be here several months before they’re even allowed out of their rooms at all, you should consider yourself lucky,”

“...Right,” You rolled your eyes. “Where is my cousin, anyway?” You asked. “Is he back at the hospital in New York?”

“Excuse me?” He looked at you in confusion. “I’m not sure I understand,”

“Oh I guess it’s been a few days,” You thought out loud. “He must have gone home by now,”

“...Well I’d sure hope so,” He chuckled.

“So..” You took a seat on the couch. “What am I doing now, warden?”

“Well like I said, I can have food sent up to you if you’re hungry,” He explained as he handed you your own tablet. “We have these for you so you can browse our menu for food and amenities,”

“Mmmkay…”

“Tomorrow’s social time is at 10 am, and your group therapy is at noon,”

“..Uh huh,” You nodded as you absent mindedly flipped through the menu.

“It’s mandatory,” He added.

“...Right,”

“Wonderful,” He beamed. “Now your bathroom is there, obviously,” He nodded to a door on the other side of the room. “It has a shower with three different pressures, and a spa bathtub. I recommend you take a long hot bath and relax, the first night is usually the hardest to get used to.

“Right…”

“Alright well I’ll leave you to it,” He nodded at you with another dreamy smile.

He walked out and left you to your own devices. You walked over to the drawers and pulled them out. They were full of your clothes, how did they get these so fast? It was so bizarre all of this happened while you were out, it really did seem like some kind of episode out of Dynasty or something.

You decided to call Sonny and get some things sorted out. You picked up your phone and dialed his number and let it ring.

“Oh hey...you, how you feelin’?”

“I’m good,” You went and sat on the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Me? I’m good,”

“Really? Not sore or anything?”

“What? OH-- Yeah, y’know, of course, obviously,”

“...Thanks so much for this, Sonny. It’s gorgeous here,”

“Anytime….sweetie,”

“Is um, is Rafael doing better? Do you know?”

“Uh he’s...he’s fine, I’m sure,”

“...Well that’s good,”

“I’ll be up there next week to see you, you hang in there okay?”

“...Yeah, alright,”

“Night darlin’, you sleep well. I love you,”

“Love you too,”

Sonny hung up the phone and glanced over at Rafael who was busy writing his closing arguments for their case tomorrow.

“....Who was that?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Niece,” He lied.

“Mmm,”

“...How are you feelin’, by the way Barba?”

“Carisi, we’re not discussing anything personal, ever again. I told you that,” He grumbled, not looking up from his desk. He winced in pain every so often when he pulled on his stitches while writing.

“...Right,” He nodded sadly. He did feel guilty about all of this, but he knew in a few weeks it wouldn’t matter. You’d both forget about each other and move on, it was for the best.

--------

The next day you woke up and felt this overwhelming sense of dread. It was like everything had finally caught up to you, all the memory of how you got here came back to you. You missed Rafael almost immediately, Sonny’s words about how you had traumatized him rang in your head.

You wanted so desperately to call him and apologize, tell him how you would have never hurt him on purpose, and that all you wanted to do was make it up to him-- but you knew you had no way of doing that, and there was nothing you could do about it.

Your tablet began to go off, alarms for SOCIAL TIME were set on it. You tried to turn it off, but apparently a counselor had to do it when you arrived. Sneaky bastards. You sighed and pulled on some PJ pants, trying to ignore the blaring sound. You stomped out of your room and down the hall, down some stairs to a huge room labelled “REC ROOM.”

“Welcome Y/N!” A bright and cheery nurse came over and greeted you. “We have lots of activities for you here,” She began to show you around. “We have arts and crafts, several board games, and the Cards Against Humanity rounds get quite rowdy!”

“...Right,” You nodded softly, feeling more and more hopeless as you saw all the other “residents” mingling-- and by mingling, meaning most of them were walking around like soulless zombies. Was this your life now?

----

One Week Later

“Hey…” You saw Rafael laying down in front of you, reaching out for your hand. You took it, not believing this was real.

“I love you, Y/N…” He smiled at you, his green eyes sparkling.

“I love you too Rafael..”

You shot up in bed, it happened again. You had been having the same dream ever since you had gotten to Whistling Pines. It felt so real, especially when you touched his hand. And you always woke up alone, stuck in your prison. Never to see Rafael ever again; It was torture. No matter how fancy the prison was, it was still a prison. You looked at the clock on your bedside table- 3:30 am. You wondered what Rafael was doing at that moment-- well, probably sleeping, duh. Or maybe he was up late, working on law stuff.

You wondered if he was thinking about you, if he ever thought about you. He didn’t seem angry the last time you saw him, in fact you were pretty sure you remembered him holding you and crying. Well, like Sonny said he was probably just upset having to see someone like that again. But-- something inside told you that you didn’t leave on bad terms. Maybe you had been too quick to just delete and block his number. But it was too late to do anything about that now. You laid back down and cried yourself back to sleep for the fifth time that night.

=============

Two weeks later

Sonny drove up to Hartford early Friday morning, hoping to get back to the city that night. He signed in at the front desk, muttering obscenities under his breath. He paced the lobby waiting for you, trying to keep his calm. Finally you emerged from the big double doors: You were dressed in a t-shirt that used to be tight, but now it draped on your shoulders. Your hip hugger jeans were more like men’s jeans, hanging off your pelvis. Your hair was pulled into a messy ponytail and you had no makeup on. You walked over to Sonny who crossed his arms at the sight of you.

“Hey, Sunshine…” He pulled you into a tight hug, your face barely moved into a small smile.

“Can we talk?” He asked as he led you to one of the leather couches.

“Sure,” You nodded like a robot as you sat next to him.

“So Sunshine,” He sighed. “They tell me you haven’t uh, been doin’ so hot,”

“Oh, have they?” You mumbled, playing with a hole in your jeans.

“Yeah they said you’re not eating, you skip the group, you won’t talk to anybody,” He put a hand on your knee. “Is everything okay? Is it your new liver? The diabetes kicking yer ass?”

“...No, I’m fine,” You shrugged feebly.

“....Seriously?” He removed his hand, his soft tone gone. “So, nothing’s wrong with you physically? You’re just being a brat?”

“Excuse me?” You suddenly blinked in surprise.

“Here I came up here because I was worried somethin’ was really wrong with you, like you were rejecting the donation or-- or the trauma was too much, but you’re tellin’ me you just won’t cooperate?” He snapped at you.

“...What do you want me to say, Sonny? Sorry?” You snarked back.

“I want you to tell me why!” He tried not to yell but this was ridiculous. “Do you know how expensive this place is?!”

“Oh wow,” You scoffed. “Well I’m sorry my recovery is so expensive for you, Son,”

“It’s not even recovery, Y/N! You’re-- You’re just laying around here like a fuckin’ angsty teen!” He barked. “Why aren’t you trying? Don’t you wanna get outta here and get back to your life?”

“Maybe I don’t!” You yelled and stood up. “Maybe I don’t care about getting out of here, or not. There’s no point anymore,”

“What?” Sonny furrowed his brows. “Why not?”

“...Because,” You looked down at the floor.

“Oh for fuck’s sake…” Sonny threw up his hands, finally standing up himself. “Is this about Barba, really Y/N? You knew him for a few fuckin’ days, gimme a fuckin BREAK,”

“He was wonderful to me, Sonny! He was wonderful and loving and caring and YOU made me go off on him, and then I--” You paused, tears caught in your throat. “I fucking traumatized him. I hurt him so badly he didn’t even want to see me when i was dying,”

“I mean-- how bad of a person am I?!” You tried not to break down in the lobby. “I shouldn’t be allowed to be around anyone anymore, I just destroy things. Hurt people. I shouldn’t be around anyone,”

“Oh Jesus Christ,” Sonny sighed. “You need to stop, alright? If you actually tried to get better, you wouldn’t--”

“I don’t want to get better!!!!” You flat out stomped your foot, not caring about making a scene now.

“Y/N, tough love time. You need to get your shit together and forget about Barba, alright? I can’t keep paying for you to stay here--” He put both hands on your shoulders.

“So let me out,” You glared at him.

“....And if I let you out, are you going to stay sober?” He gave you a suspicious look.

“Nope,” You said with a smirk.

“Y/N come the fuck on,” He threw up his hands.

“What?” You crossed your arms. “I’m being honest. So either you keep wasting your money here, or let me go,”

“And what, let you kill yourself?” He asked angrily.

“...Maybe,” You muttered.

“Sunshine, come here--” Sonny went to wrap you in a hug, his t-shirt caught up on yours causing it to pull up on his torso. Your eyes went wide when you caught sight of it, letting go of him.

“....Where’s your scar?” You blinked in disbelief, trying to wrap your head around what you were seeing.

“What?” He began to panic.

“Your scar,” You pulled your t-shirt to reveal your own scar from the transplant. “You should have one,”

“Oh, Um--” Sonny began to rack his brain for an explanation, but your brain was moving faster.

“.....You didn’t give me part of your liver, did you?” You pulled away from him.

“Uh well--” He sighed “Not exactly, no,”

“Then who did?” You eyed him accusingly.

“They got you an anonymous--”

“Oh don’t even give me that shit, Sonny,” You stopped him. “This-- this whole thing, when I got here. It felt so much like, like a set up. A soap opera plot,”

“A soap opera?” Sonny laughed. “Come on Sunshine, don’t--”

“Why did you ship me here so fast, Sonny?” You asked, your brain now on a roll.

“What?” He half laughed. “So that you could get started early--”

“No,” You stopped him. “You could have just let me come here on my own, CONSCIOUS,”

“Well I just wanted you to skip the DT’s--” He tried to think of a defense.

“DT’s don’t happen to you if you get drunk ONCE, Sonny!” You raised your voice.

“Well how was I supposed to--” He looked around nervously.

“Who really gave me their liver, Sonny?” You narrowed your eyes.

“I told you, I don’t--” He began to lie again.

“I’ll look it up,” You threatened, making his eyes go wide.

“Y-You can’t do that,” He protested.

“Why wouldn’t you want me to?” You challenged him.

“...Because--”

“Rafael did, didn’t he?” You weren’t letting him think of any more lies.

“Look Y/N, he just wanted to help you out so that you wouldn’t die, like his dad. He couldn’t save him so he saved you. Doesn’t that sound like him?”

You had to admit, it really did. But why lie about it?

“So why didn’t you tell me that, Sonny? Why tell me you did it? Why didn’t you just tell me he did it to be nice, and not that he hated me?”

“I never said he hated you--”

“If you lied to me about that, what else have you been lying to me about?” You put your hands on your hips.

“What?”

“Oh my god…” You started to remember your recurring dream. “It was real, it was real. I know it was real!”

“...What was real?” His eyebrows furrowed.

“I keep having this dream where Rafael is across from me lying on a table, and he tells me that he loves me. And I know that happened I know it did,” You explained.

You were absolutely sure of it now. So many thoughts were running through your mind, you hated that you didn’t remember any of this before.

“What?” Sonny laughed again. “Sunshine it’s just a dream, don’t you think you would remember something like that?”

“They...they gave me something before I went into the OR,” You looked off into nowhere as you tried desperately to recall that morning. “The nurse called it…’giggle juice’,”

“Giggle juice?” Sonny rolled his eyes.

“Did you make them give me that too?!” You went for his collar, but a nurse came out of nowhere to hold you back.

“Wha who whoa, Sunshine calm down,” Sonny waved the nurse off of you. “I got her, thanks ma’am,”

“I didn’t tell them to give you anything,” He said softly.

“Yeah, just to keep me out for three days so I wouldn’t ever see Rafael before you sent me here,” You accused him.

“...Not true…” He shook his head.

“Why wouldn’t you want me to talk to him, Sonny?” Tears choked your throat.

“He didn’t want to talk to you--”

“Bullshit!” You stomped your foot, eyeing the nurse who had her eye on you in case you lost it on Sonny again.

“Bullshit, were you scared he was going to tell me what you were really doing? That you were trying to keep us apart?” Tears began dripping from your cheeks. You couldn’t believe this was happening, you couldn’t believe you could have been with Rafael this entire time.

“No!” He protested, his eyes darting back and forth. “No, I--”

“I don’t believe you!” You pushed him, the nurse stepped forward but you put your hands up in defeat. “You’re keeping him from me right now, aren’t you?”

“What?”

“That’s why you sent me so far, he has no idea where I am, and he wants to know doesn’t he? He wasn’t traumatized by my ‘incident’, he’s traumatized he lost me!” You hated that you cried when you got angry, it made you so much less intimidating.

“Traumatized is a strong word, Y/N…” Sonny rolled his eyes.

“Y’know what Sonny,” You shook your head while you wiped your eyes. “I’ll make you a deal. You bring Rafael here, and I’ll try to get better,”

“...I can’t,” He looked at the floor.

“Wha--Are you serious?” You half laughed sarcastically. “You’d rather me rot in here than--”

“I don’t know where he is, Y/N,” He looked up at you seriously.

“...What?” You asked, not wanting to know the answer.

“He…” He rubbed the back of his neck. “He left,”

“What do you mean ‘he left’?” You air quoted left.

“He went on some campaign trail, Hilary I think. He took off across the country, I literally have no idea where he is right now,” He explained.

“Why would he do that?” You asked.

“I don’t know, he said he had to get out of the city--” He shrugged.

“And you couldn’t imagine why?” You gave him a knowing look.

“Oh puh-lease Y/N, he’s not a drama queen like you--” He stopped, thinking about it. “Okay well he might be a drama queen but--”

“You can call him,” You pointed to his pocket.

“I can’t,” He looked down at the ground once again.

“WHY NOT?!” You were getting fed up with him.

“He was….he was super pissed at me for keeping you apart, alright? You’re right. He...he changed his number when he took off, he wants nothing to do with me,”

“So he’s just...gone?” Your voice cracked.

“Sunshine, I promise you. In a few weeks you won’t care about him, and you’re gonna wanna get out of here,”

“Why, you're gonna start adding memory pills to my regiment too?” You scoffed with angry tears in your voice.

“Jesus,” He rolled his eyes. “No, because you’re 22 and you can fall in and out of love like that,” He snapped his fingers.

“No I won’t,” You shook your head. “You’re gonna have to let me out of here or I’ll die in here,”

“God you’re such a--” Sonny sighed in frustration. “I can get them to get you to eat, y’know that right?”

“Do it!” You dared him. “Start treating me like some kind of mental patient, control my life like you think you need to,”

“...I can’t deal with this,” He waved his hands and started to walk away. “I’ll be back in a few weeks, I’m sure you’ll be over this by then,”

“Don’t count on it,” You stomped back into the ward.

-----------------

A week later

You let the night nurse into your room, she brought your meds and a nightly snack.

“Well, are you excited for tomorrow?” She asked, making conversation.

“...What’s tomorrow?” You asked as your downed your pills.

“Your last day!” She smiled.

“...What?” You quirked an eyebrow.

“Well, honey you’re not here on a court order or probation, and your cousin only paid for 30 days. So, you’re leaving tomorrow!”

“You’re just...you’re just letting me go??” You asked in disbelief.

“You’re not happy about that? I’m sure we could talk to your--” She started.

“No!” You stopped her. “No, No I’m totally excited, ready to get back to real life,”

“Good!” She smiled and patted your head. “Make sure you’re all packed, we’ve already filled this room once you leave,”

“...Of course you have,” You rolled your eyes.

She left and you began to frantically pack, ready to get out of here as fast as possible. You would find Rafael on your own, you knew you could.

----------

Sonny’s phone went off while he was out on a call, he saw it was Whistling Pines so he excused himself from the scene and answered it.

“Hello?”

“Yes, Mir. Carisi? This is Sylvia at Whistling Pines, we were just checking on Miss Y/N,”

“....Why would you be checking on her? Don’t you have her?”

“...No sir, she checked out a few days ago,”

“WHAT?!”

“Well it had been 30 days and you had only paid for a month--”

“So you just let her leave?! Why would you do that?!”

“Well sir, for one she’s a grown woman who’s a law abiding citizen, she wasn’t committed here by any kind of law enforcement. And like I said you only paid--”

“For a month,” He growled. “That’s all that matters to you people, isn’t it?”

“Well sir, this is a very expensive--”

“Where did she go?”

“What do you mean where did she go? She left with you,”

“Uh she sure as hell did NOT,”

“...Well she got in a car with a man…”

“Oh my god,” Sonny almost dropped the phone. “I swear to God if something happens to her because of you people I will sue you SO fast--”

“Okay no need to get hysterical,” She began to panic. “Why don’t you just come here and we’ll figure it out…”

“No I think you’ve done enough,” He growled before hanging up on her.

Where the hell had you gone? And with who?!

[dreamii-yume]

New Episode Update Let’s GOO!!!

Warning : This is just Yume having a mental breakdown, seriously. This episode update was WHACK.

~ MAJOR SPOILERS FOR 68-75 ~

I know we ain’t participating and all but the game reminding you that there’s 10 minutes left to prepare is seriously bad for my heart.

Aah, shiet. Vil is still hurt.

He still has small wounds and scratches that he hid make up. Daddy, I’m worried.

Apparently, yeah, I’m not the only one cause my homeboy, Epel just asked to switch the center role with Vil. THE CONFIDENCE.

Aw, he’s worried about him falling over during stage (And make the performance look bad) Come on, Epel just be honest-

...He finally became the ideal poisoned apple that Vil wanted, huh?

Vil being proud a mom.

But the queen inside him is STRONG.

He’ll embrace the villain in him, OUR QUEEN CAN STILL GO. INJURED, WHO?

...AAND he proceeds to roast Epel again lol Typical Vil.

I love how Epel just accepted a nickname like “Doku Ringo-chan” lol It’s so cute, senior-junior relationship goals right there.

HERE WE GO.

Everyone is actually really confident hahaha

I really wish Deuce’s mom, Ace’s brother, Jamil’s sister, and Vil’s dad were here in person to watch.

HECK I WANT KALIM’S WHOLE FAMILY HERE WHY NOT

T-THEY’RE REALLY LETTING US HEAR THE FULL SONG. 

IS THAT JAMIL RAPPING.

Look at Jamil’s solo SD dancing. LOOK AT IT.

I really fucking love Vil’s singing voice aaa

HIS VOICE IS SO GOOD.

Album when disney.

Is Vil okay.

...aight im hearing some high quality panting here

...dont mind me listening to it a bit too much...

...they’re going to be great reference for some spicy- leave me alone

Vil panting is making me feel SOMETHING.

ANYWAY. THE CROWD IS A MOOD.

IS VIL OKAY.

Unmei no megami is giving me idia ptsd here.

Heartslabyul Senpais are watching their kids, looking all proud *sniff

Oh god, after playing Obey Me, it just occurred to me how similar Cater and Asmodeus’ voices are...

Watch these Senpai dorks act like Ace and Deuce’s second family. Trey being the dad, Riddle being the mom, and Cater being the supportive big bro. It’s so beautiful.

Riddle’s voice is a lot more softer now, I just realized...It’s so soothing...

God i miss u too octavinelle never change

Yeah, why tf did Floyd not audition for this

Bro, can you imagine Nobuhiko Okamoto in the squad as well??? IMAGINE-

Of course, he wasn’t in the mood back then. Of course. Why did i even ask.

IMAGINE FLOYD BEING IN VDC NEXT YEAR.

Omg i miss u too octavinelle never change

Azul’s gonna overblot again with Floyd’s marketing skills lol

Jade coming in like welp i guess thats that. Too bad, huh Azul?

GOD i miss u too octavinelle never change

SAVANA BITCHES HI

I wonder if these mfs knew that Vil just overblotted and malmal was the one who fixed the stage lol

oooh Leona’s sus about something he a sharp boi

Speak up my guy—

still so weird leona taking his job seriously

Malleus looking happier seeing this performance rather than Lilia’s lol

I miss the simpery in Sebek

Silver’s not in the verge of falling into a coma for once wow

Chenya’s so cute.

AND WE’RE BACK TO CUTE HEIGH HO TEAM

fcking shotacons man...im not one to talk

Aw, they didn’t show Neige performance...

The simping in the crowd is a MASSIVE mood.

WHO WINS TELL ME

These night raven fuckers better vote for us and not pull a “oh shie my hand slipped lololol” i swear to god- im gonna throw hands

*me holding my phone and pretending to vote as well

Suspense music intensifies be like-

HAAA

BOIS, ITS ONE VOTE DIFFERENCE WHO IS IT AAAA

WHAT.

HOW DARE- HOW!? HOW DID WE LOSE!?

WE LOST BY ONE VOTE!?

EVERYONE’S SO SHOCKED LOL

vil pls dont overblot again-

Noooo grim’s tuna cans-

WE REALLY LOST TO A LEGIT KIDS SONG.

These children do not have the right to be this cute. I wanna take Timmy, Toby, and Shelpie home.

I swear to god one of these dwarves sounds like Cheka lol Is it Toby?

EPEEELLLL DONT CRRYYYY

KALIMMMM DONT CRRYYYY

KALIM HAVING THE AUDACITY TO SOUNDING LIKE A BIG BROTHER AND THEN CRYING HIS OWN RIGHT AFTER LOLOLOL

I HATE THIS EPISODE YALL MADE MY TWO BOIS CRY IM FIGHTING THIS EPISODE. BURN THIS.

This background music too though im deeeeddd

KALIM IM SO SORRY FOR MAKING A SINFIC ABOUT YOU PLS DONT CRY-

Jamil impressed about Vil being “calm” and Vil just going “h e h. you dont even know.”

....ha...

Monsieur Rook. WHAT did you say.

ROOK VOTED FOR ROYAL SWORD. Are you kidding me. You snek how could you- i loved you

WHAT DID I SAY- Ya’ll night raven fuckers shall not slip by their fingers when voting rook.

Vil is in the brink of passing out aaaaa

I have never heard Ace this pissed before whoa- lol he sounds like Deuce in his delinquent mode

Aw...Rook felt that Neige’s performance carries a stronger bond than theirs :’( it’s hard to put the blame on him when he’s saying all these stuff

It’s just like what they said in the past episodes that it’s really hard voting for your own team when you know the opposing team is better.

Aww...He just wanted Vil to believe in himself more...Rook is such a best man. Im crying-

Oh noooo is Vil gonna cry too nooo- daddy turned to baby really quick SOMEONE GIVE HIM AN EMERGENCY HUG

Well- at least...at least the 100 year record of not being able to win is still going, yeah? Um...bad joke? Sorry, i’ll see myself out-

NEIGE NOT NOW AND YOUR VII-KUN BULLSHIT- we’re having a moment here

Neige is such sweetheart but aaaahh— This makes it worse, we can’t even hate him aaa—

OMG JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THINGS COULDN’T- AAAAA

MONSIEUR ROOK. YOU’RE A FAN OF NEIGE!?

MOTHERFUCKER just got exposed by Neige himself lol

Going to Neige’s shake hand events, sending him letters, buying all his merch and shie- HE’S A FULL BLOWN NEIGE STAN

WTF YOU SNEK GET OUT OF THIS SCHOOL-

OOOOHHH THAT FUCKING ALBUM- HIS “LIFE’S WORK” or whatever bullshit IS FULL OF NEIGE

...actually- my japanese is lacking- im not sure lol what is a ブロマイド??? Lol I feel like a clown.

Rook is sweating profusely LOL

...what do you have to say for yourself, monsieur rook.

Wait- huh is that-

IS HE GONNA CRY-

WHY IS EVERYONE CRYING!??!?!?!

HE’S SILENTLY CRYING AS HE INTRODUCED HIMSELF TO NEIGE WHAT. THE. FUCK IS THIS EPISODE.

Neige fanclub??? Eternal Snow??? What kind of creepy-ass- OH, HE EVEN HAS A MEMBERSHIP NUMBER TOO-

Props to Neige with his :) expression unfaltering.

I’m- I’m speechless.

Vil is just looking down at Rook in disappointment like- “you’re more pathetic than I am”

Queen just went “I think you need this handkerchief more than I do now” THAT’S RIGHT. REPENT MOTHERFUCKER.

Rook crying is cursed.

But damn, I’m kinda liking this new relationship this bitchy relationship they have

Neige just dragged everyone’s ass back on stage and his snow white energy just said “LETS ALL BE FRIENDS AND SING”

NEIGE IS FUCKING GREAT- HE REALLY DID GOT THESE BITCHES TO SING HEIGH HO LOL

ACE’S RELUCTANT SINGING AND DEUCE LOOKING LIKE HE’S HAVING FUN

KALIM IS SUCH A MOOD, SINGING EVEN WITHOUT KNOWING THE LYRICS AND JAMIL JUST HAVING THAT “i want to die” ENERGY

AIGHT. ROOK IS HAVING WAY TOO MUCH FUN AND EPEL IS TRYING HIS BEST. HE’S SO CUTE-

OMG NEIGE AND VIL HAVING SUCH GOOD HARMONY—

YAHOO Y A H O O TANOSHIINDA~~ 

YA’LL SURE ABOUT GIVING ME THIS BLESSED MOMENT??

What a somewhat happy ending, even though Rook just backstabbed us I’m crying Beauté 100 points!!!

LOL Vil realizing he’s having fun singing with Neige- “SOMEONE JUST END ME RIGHT NOW-“ The desperation in his voice-

I love how Neige’s yahoo yahoo is messing with everyone’s head, even Vil wants to pass out lol

haha Crowley is so depressed lol

WHA- WHO-

HEADMASTER OF ROYAL SWORD!?

He looks like your typical grandpa- and his outfit looks like that one mickey mouse wizard outfit but blue—

Old man just went “we won lol” just to piss Crowley off I like this guy’s energy already-

Crowley being most likely as old as this guy—

ooohh this man just sensed something in this stage- Leona did too, didn’t he???

* Damn. Crowley talking so fast sounds like he’s making a load of bullshit lol

Anyway, I’m just glad that it’s not mickey mouse who’s the headmaster— I would’ve lost my shit.

We’re back in our dorms and I forgot that the squad doesn’t live with us anymore. It’s suddenly so lonely now...

Grim is getting the yahoo yahoo ptsd too lol it’s too goddamn catchy

oooohh shiet- mickey is calling us again

YES we finally got a good picture of this motherfucker

It seems like nothing is disrupting our communication this time, so MC thought to call Grim but—

Grim is not here.

Uuhhh...Grim? Where you’ve gone??? We’re getting flashbacks of the first parts of the game.

We went out to find Grim and HE’S CHOMPING ON ANOTHER BLACK STONE ON THE STAGE-

GRIM SPIT THAT OUT YOU LOOK TERRIFYING

AAAAAHH GRIM HAS GONE FERAL— He’s attacking US

Is this because we didn’t win his tuna canss nooo

NoOO SWEET BABY COME BACK.

Legit I’m sad, please baby don’t overblot like this...

He learned a new move though- SCRATCH

Ooh— We’re seeing some Ignihyde scenes here~

P U H I H I

Idia getting a lot of emails from bigshot companies whoa—

THAT OLYMPUS—?! EXCUSE ME??? Ortho what- Are we finally getting that Hercules episode—

Damn getting a hot chance in olympus only to put them down the recycling bin oof— Idia why edit : Yume was informed that olympus is kind of a company that sponsored VDC sorry she was mind-fucked at this moment and the ability to understand proper Japanese just went whoosh lol Thanks to @starshiningsirius for pointing it out for Yume~ ♥︎ HONESTLY YUME’S JUST GONNA WAIT FOR ACTUAL PROFESSIONAL TRANSLATORS AT THIS POINT LOL Don’t trust me for important situation too much lol

Aaaahh...We’re getting this shut-in out of his room in the next episode, are we?

And that concludes the whole Pomefiore Episode! JESUS CHRIST 75 CHAPTERS ALL IN ALL!? How long is the Ignihyde chapter going to be, huh!?

This was a really, really fun episode lol I’d consider this a fan service episode actually cause of all the things we get to experience— The singing, dancing, and the new songs, THE DRAMA. (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

But then, the plot thickens, no? What’s going to happen to Grim? In the Ignihyde episode? And those reoccurring memories of us? And our relationship with Tsunotarou lol ALSO WE NEVER REALLY DID FIND OUT WHAT ROOK’S UNIQUE MAGIC IS. DISNEY EXPLAIN—

Thanks for reading this shitpost of Yume losing her shiet lol See you all in the Ignihyde Episode~ ❤

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

Season 4, Episode 6: An Extremely Chaotic and Incoherent Review

My favorite episode!!! GET READY FOR HEAD FULL MANY THOUGHTS

The Good:

"Kicks Get Chicks" *is the gayest episode in the entire season* Kicks get DICKS more like

"Sure, we're good for the occasional inspirational moment, but we're not exactly center mat material" HA, love that this fucker is self aware

He knows he's the Comic Relief Guy and he embraces it fully

"He who shall not be named" absolutely LOVE how Demetri just fucking despises Robby now but is trying to be lowkey about it so as not to stir the pot

If he could I'm pretty sure Demetri would pummel this man six ways to Sunday

Once again reminding everyone that Robby paralyzed and nearly killed Demetri's best friend, betrayed his and Demetri's dojo, and then held down and forcefully shaved Demetri's other best friend

Yeah he wants to like...murder Robby at this point honestly

I can't blame him, either--if someone fucked over my bestie, my dojo, AND my crush??? I would indeed be out for blood, yes

The way Demetri looks CRUSHED when Daniel's like "I know you're missing your friends but we have to put the past behind us" :( :( :(

He just wants his boyfriend back god bless

Wow no wonder Tory's fucked up, with an aunt like THAT

GOOD LORD

This season is kinda making me love Tory, I'll admit

I never thought I'd see the day but here we are

SIAHDZUIYVDX JOHNNY TRAINING IN A PLACE WITH BLACK MOLD

Could this man BE any more delightfully unhinged

Johnny Lawrence's dojo marketing will never NOT be hysterical

"Smack-dab between the pipe supply and the burned-down Chuck E. Cheese" SIR

"I'm asexual" WELL at least we exist on television, right???

I guess this is the queer rep we get for Season 4, RIP

YOOOOO IT'S MY GIRL MOON

"I can't do the whole physical aggression thing" Remind me again why she and ELI FREAKING MOSKOWITZ are meant to be compatible at all??? Literally what even would they talk about??? Well REGARDLESS, can't help but admire her staunch determination to be a pacifist in a high school singlehandedly spearheading the local karate wars

"She's the best athlete in school and she's not afraid to get into a fight" Okay don't get me wrong, I'm still seething over Moon and Piper breaking up, BUT I do find it absolutely HYSTERICAL that Moon apparently has a type

Even funnier that Yasmine lowkey fits her type too, which is apparently mean, cocky bitches who don't take shit from anyone

Oh SHIT, Sam catching Amanda talking to Tory??? This boutta get JUICY

OKAY HERE WE GO HERE WE GO

BASEMENT SCENE LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO

I've got a lot to say here but I'll try to organize my thoughts somewhat

FIRST OF ALL, I am absolutely delighted that my headcanon that these two have been friends since kindergarten and can easily let themselves into each other's houses is correct!!!

Also Demetri's gay ass is obsessed--I have a lot of long-time childhood friends, and I don't have the location of their spare house keys memorized XD

"You should really think about increasing your security given, you know, THE KARATE WAR???" Not Demetri still being the most overprotective goddamn boyfriend I've ever SEEN

He gets pissy at his friends whenever they do (or suggest) something dangerous that could get them hurt, and it's kind of hilarious but also adorable

He cares so much but has like 0 tact in showing it, bless his soul

The overprotective pissiness is turned up to eleven with Eli though, which is pretty gay

I knew so many dudes in high school who were obsessed with and idolized Batman to a weird extent so like

A very confident "YOU'RE BATMAN!!!" from a guy who seems to be one of those Batman-obsessed boys is uh

Basically a love confession

"Oh, I forget, you're not a DC guy" losing my MIND, I can't believe absolute edgelord Eli Moskowitz isn't into the kind of dark, gritty shit DC is constantly putting out XD

Plot twist of the century honestly

"Forget Batman, you're The Hawk!!!" Hey um check and fucking MATE, haters who threw shade at Demetri for being a bad friend because he never fully accepted the "Hawk" persona

He wouldn't use that as a means of trying to build back Eli's confidence if he hadn't learned to embrace "Hawk" at least somewhat????

And like even if he's still not the biggest fan of "Hawk," he thinks talking about that is what'll make Eli happy and help cheer him up and feel better about himself

He just wants Eli to be his best, happiest self ;__;

"I just proved I was an asshole. To Moon, to Miguel...especially you." Gonna point out that he listed what I think are the 3 most important people to him and he emphasized Demetri

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HIM AFTER HE SAYS THAT OH GOD THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HIM

And I could swear his voice cracks a little, like he's legit getting choked up just thinking about all the fuckery he subjected Dem to

This dude still has so much guilt festering in him about what he did to Demetri, fucker loves Demetri so much ;_;

"I forgave you, remember?" Dem of course we remember you giving in to Eli's puppy dog eyes in all of 2 seconds because you're deeply in love with him

OPE my homebody Demetri literally says he doesn't give a fuck how Eli does his hair, he still thinks he's the shit regardless

Sorry "Demetri only accepts Eli and not Hawk" truthers, y'all are wrong again

He loves all versions of Eli Moskowitz, he just doesn't want him to be an asshole actually

Which seems reasonable to me

Tfw when you say "Miyagi-Do needs you" but what you really mean is "I need you"

Gay gay homosexual gay

Okay I read some steaming hot takes about Demetri coming to emotionally blackmail Eli to join Miyagi Do or whatever, but...no??? The dude is clearly just panicking and venting and also has no filter at all when he's stressed

Like everything here just seems like panicked word vomit to me, he doesn't seem nearly controlled enough to come in with some devious plan to trick Eli into joining his dojo :/

The whole ramble when Demetri first comes down into the basement reads like he's having an anxiety attack tbh

Can't really blame him, since he's dealing with the stress of worrying Cobra Kai is gonna wipe the floor with him AND his recently-traumatized best friend going totally fucking AWOL

And Demetri seems like the type who snaps and lashes out when he's worried and/or stressed, and like I said, that could account for the absolute lack of any filter he has here

Hence "WHO CARES WHAT THEY THINK??? IT'LL GROW BACK!" Certainly not the most tactful thing to say, but Demetri is way too anxious to think before he blabs, it seems

Ah, so it's the "That's just great, you're choosing Eagle Fang over your best friend" line that everyone's getting hot and bothered about

Honestly I chock this one up to anxiety-induced word vomit, too...like Demetri is kinda just rambling and speaking his mind and his panicky thoughts are going BRRRRRRR so fast that he's definitely not stopping to consider if he's coming across as an ass

And anyways, like...considering Johnny DID help mold Eli into a dude who fully embraced toxic masculinity and bullied the shit out of Demetri, I...don't think it's that unreasonable for him to have reservations about Eli going back to Eagle Fang :/ Like I don't blame him for not wanting Eli to go back to a situation that brought out some of the worst in him

And also like??? Eli fucken dragged Demetri through the ringer and Demetri only just got Eli back in his life a few months ago, of course he would panic if he thought Eli was gonna leave him behind again!

And maybe even lash out and be a bit of a dick, cuz ya know. Homeboy's not perfect

So Eli saying "I'm not going BACK to Miyagi-Do" instead of "I'm not JOINING Miyagi-Do" implies they've discussed Eli joining MD before. I do feel like this needs to be its own scene to clarify, but it's still important to note

So no, he's not tryna guilt trip Eli into joining MD out of nowhere, he's following up on something he and Eli seem to have previously talked about

The "OH SHIT" look on Demetri's face when Eli says he quits KILLS me. Like that's his wakeup call that oh fuck, this is THAT serious and he looks absolutely horrified that Eli has hit rock bottom so hard he's resorted to quitting that has essentially become his favorite thing in the world ;___;

"Yes I will be awake" "NO SENSEI BE WOKE" Johnny Lawrence you are literally always going to make me just lose it

"What about nonbinary and genderfluid?" "Yes fluids are CRUCIAL, if you don't hydrate, it affects performance" He a little confused, but he got the spirit!!!

Also headcanon that Moon is genderfluid but isn't publicly out yet--Piper was one of the only people Moon came out to

Hence why Piper is so quick to make sure Johnny is including genderfluid people! You dun best believe she’ll still defend her ex-girlfriend’s honor

My main reasoning here is that Moon is the most transgender name I have ever heard in my entire life

Highkey love seeing Miguel and Johnny's relationship at its best again. I missed them so much!!!

Honestly good on Sam for standing up for herself!!! She's highkey right that her parents haven't really been listening to her or trying to properly address her trauma

Like for FUCK'S sake, the girl has PTSD!!! Put her in therapy!!!

Oh HELL yes, Amanda backstory!!! Let's fuckin GOOOO!!!

Oh shit, she got arrested??? PLOT TWIST OF THE CENTURY

I mean given that she married someone as chaotic and hotheaded as Daniel this shouldn't actually come as a surprise but STILL

Oh damn, I was wrong!!! I thought Amanda took pity on Tory because she saw some of young Daniel in her, but she actually sees a lot of her younger self in her ;___; Okay okay okay okay I need a minute

Lowkey they're right that "bad kids" just get told the same thing over and over and it's never gonna help course-correct

"She's not the only one who needs a wake-up call" *cuts to Eli in a depressive funk fully believing he can never do karate again* CIMENA

"You put me in a situation where I had to join the dojo" this is probably the kindest possible way to put it, considering said "situation" was "threatening me and then attempting to beat me up over a Yelp review" XD

Ah, so I see Demetri has regained some semblance of tact! Guess the worst of the anxiety attack finally passed, now that he's had the chance to take in that Eli is in fact safe (if having quite the Sadboi Hours) and not kidnapped and beat up by Kyler and co.

Uhhhhh not Demetri telling Eli that him getting Dem into Eli's special interest was the best thing that ever happened to him

Like you telling anyone that them getting you into something they liked is the best thing that ever happened to you is just so Extra and over-the-top that it's extremely difficult not to read as romantic because like

I've had a lot of friends get me into stuff over the years, and I never looked them dead in the eye like "YOU INTRODUCING ME TO THIS THING WAS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME"

Anyways tl;dr Demetri is in love

Duh

ALSO Eli's wide-eyed, pleasantly surprised look when Dem says karate is the best thing that ever happened to him, MY HEART

Oh god oh why oh no Eli looks SO FUCKING SAD when Demetri starts talking about Yasmine

Thanks I hate it

I know that look, that's the EXACT expression I make when my crush starts talking about their crush

*Bart Simpson voice* "You can pinpoint the exact moment his heart rips in half!"

"It's not gonna be as exciting if you're not there" I stg this fucker Demetri just sees the world through this sad, destitute, mopey lens when Eli isn't around and then Eli shows up and suddenly everyone upped the color saturation by like 500% and everything is all vibrant and fantastic

Again, this dude is in love

Also the way he looks at Eli when he says it, MY GOD

YOOO THERE WE FUCKIN GO THERE'S THAT SHOULDER SQUEEZE

"Scuse me" *Eli proceeds to have 0 issues with Demetri getting all up in his personal space and practically cuddling with him* Yeah, these dudes are GAY

Like Demetri is LEANING on this man like a giant cat and Eli is just like "I have no problem with this"

"I say a lot of things" God you sure do

THERE'S THE SQUEEZE THERE'S THE SQUEEZE THERE'S THE PRECIOUS SHOULDER SQUEEZE

I'm going feral actually

You tellin me this dumb video has 15k views??? I'm betting this is a viral meme in certain niche circles

And there's definitely some YouTube community who ships them

THESE IDIOTS CAN'T SING

Also are you telling me Demetri made his codename "zer0" and Eli's codename "the 1" and he's NOT in love with Eli???? Uh HUH

Like it's the perfect manifestation of Demetri's cripplingly low self-esteem (wouldn't be surprised if the dude really did consider himself a "zero" of sorts) and him fully indeed believing Eli is in fact The One (romantic)

And he's right!

Also can we appreciate just how INTO IT Eli is getting in the video??? Like this dude has literally always had a hammy, overdramatic side, it's just that prior to them meeting Miguel, Demetri was the only person who could bring it out ;__;

Absolutely HYSTERICAL that Eli is still so deeply and personally offended at the mere idea of being a "loser" XD

The utter HORROR on his face when he says it, I can't with him

"Because this is who you are" "A loser?" "My BEST FRIEND" *sobs*

Also I'm very certain that Demetri could potentially have made other friends and wasn't actually "stuck" with Eli before Miguel showed up, but he just straight up never wanted anyone but Eli as his best friend

"I know you think that mohawk defined who you are, but it didn't. Not to me. Eli, Hawk, hell, call yourself Cornelius for all I care. None of that changes the fact that you're my Binary Brother." ONCE AGAIN CHECK-MATING YOU FUCKERS WHO THOUGHT DEMETRI NEVER ACCEPTED THE HAWK PERSONA AND ONLY WANTS TIMID SADBOI ELI

He LITERALLY just said "I don't give a shit what you go by or how you wear your hair, nothing can ever change what you mean to me"

ALSO "Eli, Hawk, hell, call yourself Cornelius for all I care." basically confirms that Demetri would be down to call Eli Hawk if that's what he really wanted!!! And the hopeful look Eli gives Dem when he says "Hawk"!!!! Like I think this is the first time Eli truly realizes that Demetri fully accepts him no matter what he goes by and how he chooses to present himself and he's so euphoric about it and I think that's beautiful

Also they deadass did the "I'll take care of you." "It's rotten work." "Not to me. Not if it's you." convo with Demetri and Eli I am SCREAMING

Also ALSO my headcanon is that Demetri actually started calling Eli Cornelius as a joke and then it turned into a legitimate pet name when they started dating

"Whether you're number one...or zero" My homeboy Demetri really just said "I will take you at your best AND your worst" in Nerd

The way he looks at Eli during this entire exchange kills me, this man is so in love I'm getting secondhand pining just from looking at his big sad eyes

Actually kind of loved the Daniel-Robby interaction here because like. Daniel isn't trying to make excuses for Robby here or be like "it's okay, I know you still have a good heart!!!" Like he's done trying to be a "savior" guy and he's basically saying "do what you want, it's your life" but at the same time, he still cares enough to give Robby a warning

"I heard what you did to Eli" (threatening)

Hell yeah, Scary Daniel has entered the chat! EXCEPT

"I'm not here to judge you." Okay, well I am. Get over here Robby, I'm going to beat your ass

OH HELL FUCKING YES, AISHA ROBINSON MY LOVE

I know she's only going to be here for like 2 minutes but her presence fills me with an overpowering calmness and serenity that somehow convinces me that everything will be all right

"I broke a kid's nose" Legit forgot what an incredibly badass queen this woman is. I stan

Okay I've seen some people complaining that the writers seemed to forget that Tory and Aisha were friends too BUT I raise you that after Tory tried to basically murder Sam in the school fight I feel like it's not that whack to think Aisha would side with Sam

Like Tory went after Aisha's childhood best friend with lethal-seeming intent TWICE, it's not all that unreasonable to assume Aisha would cut ties with Tory after that

"But Tory was a better friend to Aisha!!!" Okay but Aisha and Tory were friends for like...a couple months at most, and Sam and Aisha had been friends for years and just happened to be going through a rough patch when Cobra Kai came to town. I feel like a few months of on-and-off falling out aren't really enough to cancel out a lifelong friendship, or make you suddenly not be concerned about your estranged friend's actual safety. Or side with the girl relentlessly attacking said estranged friend.

Like this coming from someone who does indeed enjoy Tory x Aisha, yes, but I do think it's important to keep things in perspective yn

"These are the same overprotective LaRussos who made me wear a helmet on your trampoline" OKAY THEY WOULD

"She's my bestie. My new school bestie, you'll always be the OG" SCREAMING CRYING SOBBING

GOOD GOD I'VE MISSED THEIR FRIENDSHIP SO MUCH

We were ROBBED I tell you ;___;

Okay I fuckin love that Aisha went "I'm gonna take all this karate bullshit I learned and use it for the POWER OF FRIENDSHIP"

And she's right!

When will Aisha return from the war??? I need her

Pretty sure she has one of the only brain cells in the valley and they desperately need it right now

I want Sam and Aisha to keep in touch and bond over their appreciation for Johnny's chaotic yet proactive life advice

PLEASE I need it

Also this fucker Johnny Lawrence really wanted to crossdress Mitch and thought no one would be fooled

As of last scene I NEED to see Sam and Aisha's reaction to this

All of Miyagi-Do chanting "MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT" is so funny because we know damn well none of these guys are the ones who truly want Demetri's meat

If you catch my drift

"DAMN IT" I’ll bet Demetri's more anxious and high-strung than usual because he feels bad about having to leave Eli to wallow in his sorrows in his basement and go to karate practice ;__;

OH so Eli decides to join Miyagi-Do to be with Demetri, despite literally all his other close friends being in Eagle Fang??? Fellas, is it gay to join your Totally Platonic Bro's dojo full of people who are still kind of mad at you because you want to help your Totally Platonic Bro out in the AVT that bad????

Not Demetri looking at him with huge doe eyes in the background ;___;

"Is it Eli or Hawk?" "Doesn't matter, I'm just here to do what I can to help out the team" Nice to get an official confirmation that basically throughout S4 Eli has never fucking minded when Demetri called him Eli instead of Hawk

Legit have seen people upset he's cool with going by Eli again, and like??? I'm pretty sure him not feeling like he has to have a cool nickname to kick ass at karate is a good thing actually???

Like ffs let him embrace softboi Eli!!! Let him be gentle and vulnerable and true to himself, even the parts that aren't all hardcore and macho!!! He can cry at sad movies with his boyfriend Demetri and still pound your whiney toxic masculinity-obsessed ass into the ground, actually!

I SWEAR I heard Demetri's voice crack at "it's good to have you back, man"

Do I see tears in his eyes??? Is he HAPPY CRYING???

Demetri stop being so in love and so painfully unaware of it, it's making me embarrassed for you

HOLY SHIT SAM TELLING TORY OFF WAS LOWKEY TERRIFYING

But in the BEST possible way

Still feel bad for Tory, but like...SAM. QUEEN. Taking 0 shit from Tory and I am HERE FOR IT

"I'm coming for you, bitch" *evil smirk* YOU ABSOLUTE SAVAGE

Aisha was like "respond to your problems with love!" and Sam actively chose violence instead, kind of love that for her

The Bad:

Damn, these fuckers really dedicated 3 whole minutes of screentime to an AVT board meeting instead of. You know. Hawk's trauma. Or why the fuck Moon and Piper broke up. Or what Yasmine actually does with her time aside from being thirsty for Demetri. Or Daniel tryna deal with some recent manifestation of his Terry Silver trauma. Or Demetri hunting down and beating the shit out of/attempting to beat the shit out of Kyler and Gang. Or Carmen getting to do something independent of her son-and-boyfriend-related storylines. Or literally anything else

Can you tell I'm a little pressed

Also I stg they're just using the separate gender division thing as an excuse to milk even more drama out of the AVT

Like the stakes are already high enough, y'all don't need to kick them up even HIGHER and complicate the plot even more, like

We already have like 7 arcs going so let's introduce a new conflict/arc instead of working on resolving the ones we already have going

Also it's like

"What hamfisted excuse can we use to introduce more badass female characters for Woke Points so we don't have to give the ones we already have any depth whatsoever?" (Yes I'm talking about Moon and Yasmine)

Literally would not even be hard to flesh them out A TINY BIT but the show just said "no thank you, they don't properly exist as people outside of their relationship to these two gay nerd boys"

Also they’re depriving me of a Demetri-Tory fight and this is an unforgivable crime

Demetri was literally so ready to throw hands with her when she threatened Eli last season, and now we shall never perceive it

Disgusting

I just want overprotective boyfriend Demetri to fight everyone who threatens his mans

ALSO Sam deserves to beat the shit out of Kyler. As A Treat

Yeah I sure do remember that shit he pulled in S1

You try to feel up my girl and slut-shame her??? She deserves to beat yo ass like never before

And anyways we’ve seen multiple times that Sam and Tory can and do hold their own in fights against boys

So what gives, Cobra Kai???

I definitely feel Robby hatred emanating from Demetri but I would like to feel even more

This man has grievously wronged Demetri thrice now, as discussed above, and I think it would be fun if Demetri got on a warpath to absolutely destroying Robby Keene

Is it OOC, considering that Demetri is often rather violence-averse? Perhaps, but consider: I want him to find his inner darkness and become very scary

Speaking of which, why is Sam the only one who is super pissed and vindictive??? As if Demetri WOULDN'T be

Listen, being fight-averse doesn't extend to when your best friend who you're in love with gets pinned down and shaved

Ah, so the LGBT rep this season is acknowledging that asexuals, nonbinary people, and genderfluid people...exist???

Wow, such great rep, I'm shaking and clapping and cheering

Very convenient for the writers that their rep didn't include actually writing any LGBT characters

Also we still haven't gotten any fucking reason or explanation as to why Moon and Piper broke up

Like if they're gonna split up the only LGBT couple in the show, the very fucking LEAST they could do is tell us why :/

Was Piper becoming too much of a jerk for Moon to be okay with??? Did they clash because of Moon's staunch pacifism and refusal to get in a physical brawl ever??? Who the hell knows??? Definitely not us

Probably not the showrunners either

They just needed to set up the stupid Hawk x Moon plot that they're dragging out of the grave like a horrible gross heteronormative zombie

Okay as much as I love the basement scene I 1000% feel like there was a scene missing between the hair-shaving reveal and the basement scene

Like are you really telling me that Demetri didn't check in on Eli once until after he'd already been AWOL for a cool minute??? I simply do not buy it

And like it doesn't even have to be an Eli-Demetri scene, it could be something as simple as Demetri talking to Chris and being like "hey have you seen Eli? He hasn't been at school and he's not answering his phone. And he hasn't been to a single practice since...well, you know." And Chris is kinda confused like "No, I haven't see him at school, but wouldn't he be going to Eagle Fang practice???"

Cue Demetri explaining that he and Eli had previously discussed Eli potentially joining Miyagi-Do if the dojos split, so Demetri expecting Eli to join Miyagi-Do doesn't lowkey come out of nowhere

THEN Demetri asks Miguel if Eli's been at Eagle Fang practice, and Miguel is like "No, actually...I'm starting to get really worried tbh" and reveals Eli hasn't been answering Miguel's texts and calls either

And THEN Demetri busts into Eli's basement like "WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN"

They seriously could have replaced that AVT board meeting scene with this bit and it would have made everything 4000x better

ALSO like. Why is Miguel not concerned at all about Eli regularly bailing on practice??? They're buddies--I'd expect ONE line of worried dialogue being like "Where's Hawk at?" at the very LEAST

Anyways like I mentioned before I feel like there needs to be some kind of explicit confirmation that Eli and Demetri previously talked about Eli joining Miyagi-Do if/when the dojos split, because otherwise Demetri being fully under the impression Eli's going to come back to MD instead of EF seems a little out of left field

Okay, wow. WOW. They seriously could not let Demetri and Eli have ONE scene

ONE GODDAMN SCENE

Without having Demetri bring up Yasmine to very insistently remind us that he's straight -___-

How even is Yasmine "the girl of your dreams" dude, her only personality traits are "hot" and "makes a sassy comment once every 7 years"

"None of that changes the fact that you're my binary brother" Damn they're seriously trying so damn hard to convince us these dudes have a "brotherly" relationship and simply will not accept it's never, ever going to work

Also did they seriously No Homo Demetri and Eli twice in one scene

Of course they fucking did

They know damn well there's gay tension but still deny it at every turn to appease the creepy homophobic conservative fanbase

For shame, homophobes! You've messed up a perfectly good queer-coded karate show is what you've done!

Look at it, it's got heteronormativity!!!

Regardless I can't help but get some amusement out of the fact that the writers are constantly trying so desperately hard to convince us Eli and Dem aren't gay because their interactions are just that inherently fruity

Y'all fighting a losing battle, we all know damn well they're gay

Hey Daniel I know Robby is your ex karate son but you absolutely should judge him for the shit he pulled with Hawk actually

Forceably shaving someone's head in an attempt to destroy their self-esteem is not very punk-rock at all

Also they really be treating Daniel's Terry Silver trauma like Trauma Lite

Like they're barely doing anything with it at all :/

If it's meant to be the reason he's being kind of a self-righteous jerk this season, then like??? They could talk about that??? They could explore it more and what the long-term effects Silver had were???

But nah, just one uncomfortable convenience store confrontation and that's all we need I guess

They GAVE me my Aisha Robinson??? Only to take her away again??? This is unspeakable cruelty and I am going to scream

Okay so like. Devon seems cool, don't get me wrong. But also can this show fucking CHILL with introducing new characters???

Like we are on SEASON FUCKING FOUR we have PLENTY of characters and arcs to work with already!!!

Also Cobra Kai Writers Stop Introducing New Female Characters Because You Don't Know How To Write Your Existing Ones Challenge

WHAT is this weak-ass bro-hug shit, I know my boy Demetri and he would absolutely CRUSH Eli in a hug, sorry

Maybe he doesn't wanna be TOO gay in front of all his MD friends but boy it is FAR too late for that

Damn the gayest episode is behind me now, idk what to do with myself :O

Guess I’ll have to create some Elimetri and YasMoon content

[star-killer-md]

Actus Reus, Mens Rea

@contesa-lui-alucard asked:

Hey hey happy sleepover my friend!! If it’s alright with you, I have two prompts from the Smut list that I’d love to see you combine for... mob Kylo and lawyer reader! Oh snap!! 15 & 37, if you please. If not, no worries, I still hope you have an awesome sleepover 😁 (“Make it hurt, baby.” + “Lay back and touch yourself. I want to watch.”)

Anon asked:

hello, may i request clingy/possessive kylo,, thank you

Thank you lovlies for your requests and sorry from the bottom of my depressed ass heart that it took me so fucking long. Anyway here ya go, hope you enjoy some mobster Kylo deliciousness. I’m so excited you liked him Contesa, and I hope you’re into it as well too nonny! Sorry it got long, I truly have no control over that. 

And thank you so much to @sacklersdoll for reading over this for me!

Word Count: 4.4k

Warnings: Angst (its me), Smut (its me), mentions of predator/prey dynamic (mostly as metaphor), possessive Kylo Ren, semi-public sex, no pronouns for the reader by they are afab, dominant Kylo Ren, some brat vibes, Kylo Ren is not nice, allusions to guns, some sorta stalking behavior

Ship: Mob Boss!Kylo Ren x Lawyer!Reader

Summary: You’ve started to take on some pro bono clients as a favor to a friend and Kylo Ren is Not A Fan™ of all the attention this guy has been paying you. After a few months of consulting on the side, you’re beginning to wonder if life working for a mob boss is something you’re really cut out for. Though you quickly learn that you very well may have passed the point of no return when Kylo shows up at your office to remind you just who exactly you work for. 

“I really can’t thank you enough.”

You shook the woman’s hands and returned her smile. Her son stayed quiet, looking at the ground, but mumbled his thanks as well. He was a good kid. Just pissed off the wrong neighbor. One of those ‘get off my lawn,’ ‘good ole American dream’ types who thought welfare was a sign of the devil, and had it out for everyone in the lower tax brackets. 

“Really, it’s no problem,” you walked them to the door, leaving her your business card. “I’ll see you both at the courthouse on Monday.” 

Evan was waiting in your office when you returned. His patent leather shoes rested precariously on the corner of your desk and you knocked them off with a huff. 

“See you’ve made yourself at home,” you said, crossing your arms and staring down at him in your chair. 

He shrugged and stood under your scrutiny, moving around to take the seat across from you. Evan Goodman was an old friend from undergrad. You often got the impression he was still that same cocky frat boy in the head. Still flashed the ‘my daddy has more money than you’ smile on occasion when he really wanted to get under your skin. With his slicked back hair, unnervingly straight teeth, and his annoying prosperity despite never putting in much effort it was somewhat shocking the two still spoke. He was simply not the type of person who had ever needed to try. Success came naturally to him, and much to your dismay.

“What can I say? You’re a very gracious host,” he mused and leaned forward on the desk. “So, how did it go?”

You sighed, “They’ll be alright, might get saddled with a fine but the charges aren’t that serious.” 

“Good, Rosa’s an old friend. I would have helped her out myself, but not really my deal ya know?”

“Yeah, Mr. Tax Attorney, I get it.” 

Evan was kind of a dick, but he was also the kind of friend who would sit on the bathroom floor with you, hold your hair back and sing horrendous parody versions of ABBA no matter who heard. So you couldn’t hate him entirely. That also meant that when he came to you with cases like this, a favor for a friend or whatever the situation may be, you had a hard time refusing. 

It was also a convenient front for you not-so-legal legal work you’d been invested in for the past few months.

“Seriously, I know I’ve been asking a lot of you recently,” he flashed you that god awful grin and kicked his feet up again. “You can tell me to fuck off if it’s too much.” 

He had been coming to you for pro bono work with increasing frequency, especially over the past month or so, but again, you didn’t wholly mind it. You went into this kind of work for a reason. Though, you were starting to get the feeling that a certain, brooding, less than lawfully abiding businessman did not feel the same. 

Kylo Ren dealt frequently with the shady, black market underbelly of capitalist society, but you were less accustomed to his world and not completely ready to throw yourself to the hounds just yet.

You had already missed more than a few meetings and canceled on dinner tonight to meet with Rosa. To be fair, it wasn’t as if he’d made any indication this ill-defined whatever-it-was going on between the two of you was anything serious. And you were only his consultant, for now, so this took precedent anyway. At least that’s what you tried to convince yourself of. Definitely not a way to avoid thinking about fucking your boss who also happened to be in with the mob. 

Definitely not.  

“I wouldn’t have agreed to help if I couldn’t manage it,” you yawned softly and stood to collect your things. 

It was late and you were beginning to fantasize about how soft and warm your sheets would be. If you got back in time you could pop them in the dryer and get in an episode or two before bed. 

“Hey, let me at least buy you dinner or something since I kept you out so late,” Evan parked his skinny frame in your path to the doorway. 

“You’re going to apologize for keeping me out late, by keeping me out even later?”

“Do you want free food or not?”

Pursing your lips, you stared at him for a few moments. He really did know all your weaknesses. You had skipped out on meeting with Mr. Ren—or Kylo or sir or whatever the hell you were supposed to call him now—already tonight, however, Evan was sure to take you somewhere nice and it wouldn’t be so morally repugnant if it was just as a ‘thank you….’

“Okay, fine,” you conceded and let him lead you out to the parking garage, locking the office up behind you. 

***

The next morning you stumbled past reception in a haze. Both from lack of sleep, and the bitingly cold winds battering your building despite the neighboring high rises blocking the brunt of the gale. The young woman at the desk informed you tersely that a Mr. Goodman was already waiting for you in your office and that you should really get here on time if you were expecting clients this early. 

You agreed that, yes you probably should but, you know, “trains and all that mess,” and tried not to judge her too harshly. After all, she was the barrier between you and the hundreds of calls this place received daily. 

Before slipping through the door with your name plate, you hung your coat on the rack and switched your phone on. It’d died on you last night amidst the allure of fancy, late night dinner and your sleep deprivation riddled brain had not cared enough to plug it in before bed. Fuck Amazon, but thank god for its speedy delivery of portable charges. 

You chewed your lip as the lock screen came to life. One missed call and a text. Both, of course from the most anxiety inducing sender, Kylo Ren. Because why would it be anyone else? His name menacing even typed out in standard black font. 

The text read:

Meet me at 8am.

It was very much like him—a command with punctuation and absolutely no details. The message receipt showed it was sent two hours ago, and it was already half past eight. Shit. Your fingers shook as you pulled up his contact and called. Every interaction left you coursing with adrenaline. Even now, miles away listening to the dial tone was nerve-wracking. Your heart pounded, hands slick in their grip on your phone. Maybe it was because you were never sure where you stood with him. Maybe it was because he was handsome and he knew it. Strong and he knew it. Intimidating and mysterious and closer in some ways to a Greek god than a man. He was all encompassing, and filled every available space in any room he occupied. 

Sometimes you thought you might choke on his presence. 

It rang once, twice, three times before cutting out completely. You stared down at the blank screen, biting your lip and shooting off a quick text. You were sorry, something important had come up, you would meet him the second it was convenient. 

Evan slapped you heartily on the back when you came into the room. He was holding a bouquet of flowers, evergreen with small white blossoms. 

“So, how many hours did you manage last night?” he asked, smiling his shit eating smile and seemingly unaffected despite the fact that he had to be running on just as little sleep as you.  

“I’m not even sure at this point,” you groaned as you tossed your bags down behind the little metal desk. “Time ceases to exist when you take trains past midnight.”

“Fair enough. Hey look,” Evan waved the greenery in your face, “courtesy of Rosa’s shop. She insisted I bring you something as thanks. I figured you could put them out in the front or something to brighten things up.” 

“They’re lovely. Please tell me you’re only here as a glorified delivery boy.”

His shoulders slumped at your lack of amusement, but before he could quip back the landline in your office rang. You answered, holding a finger towards Evan and leaning against the edge of the desk. It was the receptionist, Jess was her name? Maybe? You could never remember, someone else always addressed the holiday gift cards anyway. 

“There’s someone here to see you at the front desk,” she clipped, almost more exasperated than before. 

You told her you’d be right there and hung up. Evan grabbed his coat as you headed out, holding the door for you and following into the hall. 

“I’ll leave you to it if you’re busy, but give me a call after Monday and tell me how it goes,” he continued rambling as you came out into the front.

You had a smart comeback prepared, something about how simple the case was, he should have more faith in you, he was the reason you were busy in the first place, etc…but every word turned to ashes on your tongue when you saw him. 

Kylo Ren, standing right there at the desk and glaring at your receptionist. His suit was dark blue and ironed to perfection. Each leg was creased perfectly down the front and the jacket sat flawlessly on his wide set shoulders. He was a wall of unimaginably expensive fabric and what looked concerning like barely contained rage. You could see it in the twitch of his eye, the set of his jaw, and in the way his gaze landed on you the second you walked in. 

The way a predator immediately hones in on its prey. 

You froze just feet from him in the lobby, floundering like a fish on a hook. 

Evan, for his part, seemed not to notice the tension at all and continued to say his long winded goodbyes, placing the flowers in your hands and completely unaware of the slow, measured tightening of Kylo’s massive hands into fists at his side. 

“I’m free on Monday evening so we should—” 

“She’ll be busy.” 

Evan frowned, turning to face the man standing before him, “Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” Kylo’s voice was a dark thing, low and rumbling, “She will be otherwise occupied.” 

His words were punctuated by a step towards you, one paw of a hand easily gripping your entire jaw. Lucky he did too, otherwise it would have dropped straight to the floor when he shot one last cobra strike glare in Evan’s direction, and pressed his mouth to yours. Right there. In the lobby. For everyone to see.  

The absolute bastard.

His lips were pillow plump and softer than the silk lining of his suit—and even through the surge of shock and embarrassment and more than a touch of anger—you felt your heart throb at the way he licked into your mouth. 

The flowers tumbled from your hands onto the floor as everything in you went limp under his touch. This was nowhere near the first time you’d tasted him, but it was like this every time. Like drinking ambrosia. An otherworldly experience. 

But that didn’t stop the sharp pain of his crushing grip on your arm, the way he nearly lifted your feet off the floor when he pulled away to drag along behind him. You could hear Evan spluttering in the hall behind you, the receptionist going back to clacking at her keyboard as if nothing had happened. 

When Kylo opened your office door he just about threw you inside. You tripped as he tipped you in, stumbling and catching yourself on the edge of your desk. The power behind his hand alone was undeniable. You shuddered at the thought of the array of purple fingerprints he would leave behind. It made your mouth dry and your heart sink. Confusing and delicious. 

And left you seething nonetheless. 

“What the fuck was that?!” you were not calm, so you didn’t attempt any semblance of it. 

“You didn’t answer me,” he said, level as he always was. 

The quiet before the storm and all that. 

“About the meeting? I tried to call, my phone died—”

“Because you were out catching trains at all hours of the night, I’m aware.” 

You paused, glaring at the wall of muscle between you and the door, “How did you know that?”

“So you’re not denying it?”

Kylo stalked towards you like a beast in his tailored suit and polished leather shoes like talons. You could hear your heartbeat, hear the blood rushing in your ears. Just like a rabbit in the sightline of a hawk, you were clearly being hunted. 

“Why would I deny something I’m not trying to hide?” your voice came out horse as he caged you between the desk and his chest, arms on either side to block any route of escape. 

“No you are certainly not adept at subtlety,” he said and you couldn’t take your eyes off the way his tongue moved behind his teeth. “This is the fifth time that idiot in the hall has distracted you from work.”

“That’s not an answer,” you tried to spit the words but his eyes were boring into you. The honey of them spilled down your spine and made you shiver. “How did you know? You are not entitled to any information pertaining to my personal life, regardless.” 

“Watch your mouth,” he growled. “Entitlement has no part in this.”

You were entering dangerous territory, though stopping curiously did not occur to you.

“I don’t think you have the right to be throwing out commands right now, not after that display.”

“Have you forgotten who you work for?” Kylo hissed at you, hands wrapped around the metal of your desk so hard you thought it might warp under his fingers. 

“Of course not,” you desperately tried to keep your voice down lest anyone get even more a spectacle. 

“Then what is this?” one hand left the desk and pulled a phone from inside his jacket. 

The screen lit up, and you looked in horror at pictures of yourself. Pictures of yourself from last night. Pictures of yourself from last night at dinner with Evan, interspersed with shots of you crossing the street, waiting on the train platform, and stumbling back into your apartment. Each was clearer than you’d expected, presumably from some insanely expensive surveillance equipment. You had been out for hours, and you had been watched the whole time. 

You narrowed your eyes, flicking back and forth between Kylo’s face—the graceful bridge of his nose pointed down at you—and gaped. 

“You had me followed…” you breathed the words into the slowly shrinking space between your bodies. 

He simply nodded, as if, somehow, you were foolish for not having considered this before. Perhaps you were. Perhaps you had no idea what you had gotten yourself into. Perhaps you had signed on for much more than a paycheck when you agreed to work for Kylo Ren. 

“I can’t have my employees getting distracted.”

Kylo slowly drifted ever closer, shoulders bent so he was eye level with you. He pressed further into the desk, pinning you between his body and the hard surface that bit into your ass. Something long and thick and hard nudged your thigh. 

“I don’t know why you though having me followed was necessary—” 

“You’re an arrogant little slut who needs to be reminded of your priorities,” his hand snatched your leg and wrenched it open so he could stand between them, “ I am not something you do on the side.” 

You could hear the way his teeth grit out the words, the way they formed as a growl deep in his beast’s throat. The hand still settled on the desk, skimmed up your hip and chest, his fingers 

biting into your jaw. 

“Do you understand me?”

Your lips were shut tight in a thin line, eyes wide and staring up like the prey you were. The silence only provoked him more. Snarling, two thick fingers wrenched your mouth open, pressing hard on your tongue and making you gag around them. 

“Answer.” 

Kylo Ren almost always spoke in commands. Having power did that to people, and rarely did it ever compel you, but his words sunk deep into your bones. Dredged up some dark, instinctual need to obey. To submit to this show of control. 

“Yes,” you mumbled around his fingers in your mouth, drool slipping past your lips when they moved. 

“Yes, what?” 

“Yes, sir.” 

You watched him suck his teeth, grabbing your face tighter and dragging you close so he could spit directly into your open mouth. He slammed your jaw shut, nearly taking off the tip of your tongue and hissed into your ear. 

“Swallow.” 

Again, you did without a thought. And it was disgusting, but invigorating, sent off some spark in your stomach with how easily he bent your body to his will. There was no man like him, you decided. And maybe this was simply because Kylo Ren was not a man. That term alone would never do him justice. 

In one shockingly smooth motion, you found yourself flat on your back, ass hanging off the edge of the desk with his hands on your hips. He ground himself against you, the throbbing of his cock evident even through the layers of clothing. That feeling on its own had you soaked through, thighs sticking with liquid excitement. 

“Remember who you work for,” he growled into your neck, licking a long stripe up your throat and sucking at the exposed skin. 

But it was very clear to you what he really meant. 

Remember who you belong to. 

You slapped a hand over your mouth as he bit down on the skin just above your shoulder, laving his tongue over the stinging flesh. Kylo pulled back, frowning down at you and yanking the hand away from your face. One held both your wrists in a vice lock while the other ripped your panties straight down your legs and left the dripping fabric discarded on the carpet. 

“No, they’re going to hear you,” he grunted, and pulled one of your hands down, pressing it to your slit and running your fingers through your slick. “Go on, touch your fucking pussy and let them know what a little whore you are for me.” 

It was something about his voice. Something in the way it left him, its timbre, its wonder, unquestioning. You could never refuse him. 

So, with a small nod you parted your folds, head resting on a stack of files as you drew slow circles around your clit with a shaky hand. His eyes never left your cunt, tracing the movement of your finger and the trail of wetness that seeped from you to the desktop. Softly, you gasped as the familiar placement of your fingers made you clench and arch up. Kylo’s rubbed small circles into your inner thighs with his thumbs, kneading the flesh there. 

When the spark was there, the lovely pulsing in your nerves alight, you dipped down, teasing and slipping inside, grinding down as best you could on your hand. It wasn’t enough, but nothing ever was since you’d been ripped open on Kylo’s cock. 

Evidently he did not find your work sufficient either. 

Another finger joined yours, stroking your lips and circling your entrance. His touch made you whine, the promise of hands that were not your own never ceasing to illicit a new gush of pleasure. 

“I said,” he murmured, his touch so terribly feather light. “Let them hear you.” 

He was like a gunshot, sudden and forceful and almost instantly had you screaming. Kylo slammed his fingers into you, so full and so deep, curling hard against that lovely spot inside. 

“Kylo, god, please—” you moaned long and low, your face burning with the knowledge that the walls were barely thick enough to keep your phone calls private, much less the shameful noises he pulled from you. 

“What was that?” he panted, adding another finger and pumping them deep into your cunt. “You can do better.” 

Your teeth dug so hard into your lip you thought it might bleed, but you couldn’t take much more. The ledge was approaching—Kylo Ren knew it—and he was determined to push you straight into the fire. 

You choked when his deliciously thick fingers were ripped from you, walls fluttering around the awful emptiness. Your head lolled back as you listened to him work the buckle of his belt and slacks open, and when you did glance down your mouth watered at the sight. Kylo—impossibly long cock throbbing in his hand—stood between your legs, stroking himself from root to tip. You watched little pearls of precum bead at the head while his thumb swiped across to smear them along his length. 

“You are insane,” you hissed through gritted teeth. 

Did you need to keep this position? No, technically you would be more than well off on the salary Mr. Ren so graciously provided. However, you could not mentally deal with being terminated for getting dicked in your office during work hours. 

Kylo smirked, the edge of his perfect cupid’s bow cocked back and aimed straight at your chest. Without warning, he sunk into you, straight to the hilt and threw his head back as you sobbed with the sharp sting of being split in two on his cock. 

“This is what you do,” he growled into your ear, hands on either side of your head as he worked his length back out only to pound into you again. “You work for me and you take my cock and don’t ever fucking forget that.”  

Your legs were wound so tightly around his waist that had he been any other man, his ribs would have cracked under the pressure. His hair, falling in black, satin waves, was gorgeous even in the sterile office lighting. You threaded your fingers into it at the roots and held him while your body rocked against the desk. It’s metal surface pinched at your sink and made your back ache, though that was nothing compared to the burn of Kylo’s thrusts, sliding against your walls. You felt him in your throat. You always did. That was simply the way things were with him. He filled you painfully, thoroughly, took over all of your senses until it was just him. 

And, strangely, it was the most alive you’d ever felt. 

He was unlike anyone you’d ever known.

You couldn’t scream for him, but you could still let him taste the desperation, the willingness in your body to mold against him. So you kissed him, dragged him by the hair to meet your lips and licked past his teeth, gasping and moaning on his tongue as you sucked it hard and cried into his mouth. 

And he drank you down, picking up a punishing rhythm and breaking blood vessels where his hands gripped your hips. One drifted lower, thumb pressing down hard on your clit as your cunt clenched around his length. The desk was lifting off the ground with every thrust, the room filled with the wet sounds of your bodies and you were quickly melting under him. 

Warmth was spreading, growing, building out from your pussy, igniting in your veins. He was right. This is what you did. This is what he did to you. This toe curling, lip biting, bone shattering kind of pleasure. 

Oh you were so royally fucked. 

“I—oh shit—Kylo I’m,” you pulled back just enough to pant out a warning before the wave took you. 

So hot, it washed over your skin and made your legs shake and your hands leave his hair to dig your nails into his chest through the crisp white button down he wore. 

“Feel that?” he grunted as you convulsed and shuddered under him, “Feel how this pussy was made for me.” 

You nodded, buried your face in his neck and held on as he worked you through your climax and straight into his own. Once, twice he ground his cock deep in you, feeling how tight you were around him until he was spent and spilling hot, thick ropes of cum that coated your walls and dripped out around his length. 

He panted, lazily rolling his hips, fucking you slowly until finally, he came to a halt with his softening cock still sheathed inside you. Seconds past, or maybe hours, you couldn’t tell. Kylo tended to have that effect on you. Time slipped away so easily in his presence, like there was never enough of it. 

When he did pull away, you stayed with your back firmly planted amidst the mess of scattered paperwork and manila envelopes. He rose to his full, towering height and tucked himself away, straightening the wrinkles in his suit and eyeing you only once from the side. You admired his profile, you never understood until now what the meaning of the word “regal” truly was. 

Under the dictionary definition, his picture surely would be there, staring at you down the bridge of his marble carved nose. 

You sat up on your elbows as he stalked towards the door. 

“Was that all you came for?”

Kylo paused, broad back still facing you and leaving the room feeling irrevocably empty with just the intention of his absence. 

“We’ll reschedule for five tonight,” he said, filling the door frame completely. “Don’t be late.” 

The door clicked shut behind him and the sound of it made you collapse back onto the desktop. You laid there for a moment, leaking your combined spend and aching. The throb of him settled in your muscles and festered. But the worst part was the other ache, the pain of being without. And maybe you had been a bit avoidant. Maybe this work really was so you didn’t have to see him. Because if you saw him you’d end up fucking him—which was fine, which was good, which was great actually—but then he would leave. And you couldn’t decide which wanting was worse. The wanting before or the wanting after. 

Maybe it didn’t matter. 

You had more important things to think about anyway. Like securing the receptionist an incredibly large holiday bonus, assuming you still had a job here at the end of the day. 

Maybe that didn’t matter either. 

It might be high time you made a commitment to whatever the hell kind of mess you’d stumbled into. Kylo Ren was an enigma in the best kind of way. Maybe you should stop running from it.