#sometimes when im in my computer i start talking to them

[dragon-of-timeless-blue]

I got the shimejis of the boy(friends) and i love how when they cross paths Haru just randomly shows Rin a fish and, idk what is he saying, but im sure its something about mackerel just to Rin to replay something about meat.

I just love them so much

[weirdmageddon]

i love these tags this person is so right

actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?

i wanna get into this actually

(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)

even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie

but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"

im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,

don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity

dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor

(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)

despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him

rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said

and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol

roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"

side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.

i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect

but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?

yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise

so, dave's environment

the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors

his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)

roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok

what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)

rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:

and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear

but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable

there two types of ironies at play here:

seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)

doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)

you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.

"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"

how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1

he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”

dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.

*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift

dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:

if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.

basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"

speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use

oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. ​she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”

btw dave lalonde would look like this to me

[rkvriki]

— kisses with enhypen

heyy!! i haven't been writing much im sorry! im trying to focus on my mental health coz your girl here was stressing with tests. anywayy hope you enjoy this idea i got from pinterest!

make sure to leave feedback. my requests are open and so is my talk box so let's talk!

WARNINGS ! mentions of insecurities, kissing thighs but in a sfw way! might contain grammar errors.

word count: 1.6K

LEE HEESEUNG !

— kisses your earlobe

heeseung is a tease when it comes to kissing you and he knows how you get when he kisses your earlobe.

sometimes you both are just cuddling, watching a movie and he will slowly start trailing kisses from your jaw, up to your cheek and your earlobe. 

he knows you will get ticklish and he loves seeing a reaction out of you just for the heck of it.

he will leave soft kisses there and might even suck the area, making you squirm and push him away, telling him to stop but he knows damn well you don’t want him to stop.

 — kisses your stomach

it's a tender and loving type of kiss.

hee loves taking naps while lying his head on your chest or tummy while you run your fingers through his hair.

when he’s half awake he will slip your shirt up a little just to reveal your stomach and will kiss it while running his hand through your waist, making you feel butterflies in your tummy.

if you ever feel insecure about your body or your stomach specifically he will love to kiss it even more, showing you how much he loves every inch of you.

rest under the cut !

PARK JONGSEONG !

— kisses your cheek

a sweet and basic kiss but still one of his favorite places to kiss.

jay will kiss your cheek in a simple way of greeting you or as a loving gesture.

sometimes you're doing simple chores and he’ll come behind you and leave chaste kisses from your neck to your cheek, giving special attention to it.

or you’re working on your computer and he will lean down to kiss your cheek lovingly, making you fold into his touch.

he just loves your cheeks so much, no matter if they are slim or chubby he will love them.

— kisses your collarbones

jay laying on your chest when you guys sleep together.

when he wakes up normally you aren’t awake yet, so he always finds a way to wake you up so you can eat breakfast together.

he will start kissing you neck down to your collarbones, since he has easy access to it from his head laying on your chest.

he starts softly sucking your collarbones, without any intentions behind, just as a soft gesture.

 when you finally wake up he will slide up and kiss your cheek and tell you to get ready to go eat breakfast.

SIM JAEYUN !

— kisses your forehead

to jake a kiss on the forehead can be so gentle and loving, and sometimes a way of showing he cares about you.

sometimes you just had a long day and just wanted to be in jake’s arms and he will be right at your service.

he will embrace you and tell you reassuring words while gently rubbing your back and down.

he will slightly pull away, still keeping you in his arms and will look at you with a smile and lean down to your height to leave a sweet kiss on your forehead while holding you tighter.

he is definitely is the type to rest his chin on the top of your head while hugging you.

— kisses your lips

jake has the most kissable lips ever, i have said it before and i will keep saying it over and over again.

even though it’s the most common and obvious place to kiss someone, it’s the most romantic for jake.

he loves watching your lips when you talk, which makes you frustrated and he knows it.

sometimes you will be rambling about whatever and he will interrupt you with a kiss on your lips making you whine in complaint. he pulls back and smirks at you and nods for you to keep going, making you roll your eyes at him.

PARK SUNGHOON !

—  kisses your fingertips

sunghoon does this almost unconsciously.

you two would be talking on the couch of your living room, a random movie playing in the background as you talked about random topics.

as you were laying down he held your hand in his, playing with the ring he gave you on your finger as he listened to you talking.

he would bring your hand to his lips as he left light kisses on each of your fingertips, covering your smaller hand with his bigger one when he finished.

he didn’t even realize you stopped talking and were looking at him with a smile, making him blush and get shy at you.

— kisses your shoulder

sunghoon loves kissing our shoulder in a confronting and loving way.

he does it mostly when he is hugging you from behind.

we all know he isn’t much of a morning person, but you make them a little better from him.

so when he wakes up and doesn’t find you on your side of the bed, he gets up to find you in the kitchen making breakfast for both of you.

he comes up behind you, wrapping his muscled arms around your waist, startling you a little bit.

he rests his chin on your shoulder as he watches you making the food. he pushes the sleeve of your shirt down a little just enough to reveal the skin of your shoulder and starts leaving kisses there, making your heart flutter.

KIM SUNOO !

— kisses your nose

sunoo has a special love for your nose.

he just loves how well it suits, no matter if it’s pointy, button, long or small, he loves it. it’s his favorite feature of yours.

he loves seeing it scrunch up when you laugh at something he said.

he will purposely make you laugh just to see it cutely twitch and don’t you dare hide it with your hands.

he will kiss your nose mid laugh making you scrunch it up even more.

he finds it such a cute and playful gesture and it shows so much affection and adoration.

— kisses your neck

sunoo finds neck kisses very intimate not in a sexual way but in a romantic one.

sunoo is a big cuddler and he loves being cuddled. he prefers when you hold him instead of him holding you.

so when you two are laying down in your bed ready to go to sleep, he is wrapped around you like a koala, with you holding him in your arms, he hides his face in your neck, fitting like a puzzle.

he softly inhales your scent, fresh out of the shower, his lashes softly fluttering tickling your neck, making you giggle lightly.

he starts leaving light, soft kisses on your neck, making you sigh happily and squeeze him tighter in your embrace.

YANG JUNGWON !

— kisses the corner of your lips

jungwon is a tease and loves leaving you wishing for more.

it is a playful and flirty gesture, maybe corny but it makes you laugh at the playful face he makes after.

you two would be fooling around with each other on your couch. jungwon would kiss everywhere in your face but your lips, purposely avoiding your lips just to tease you.

you would start whining in annoyance for him avoiding the place where you craved his lips the most.

he would start kissing your cheek again slowly trailing his lips towards your own, reaching the corner and leaving a kiss there. his lips hover yours and when he went to finally kiss you he gets up, laughing at your dumbfounded expression.

— kisses your inner thighs

jungwon does this in a non sexual way obviously. he just knows it tickles you and does it to annoy you.

he loves laying between your thighs, with his back resting on your stomach, while your legs rest at his sides.

you watch movies like that all the time, while his fingers softly caress your legs.

when jungwon gets bored he starts leaving kisses from your knee to your inner thigh, smooching them softly, making you giggle from the tickling sensation it leaves on your skin.

he starts leaving more kisses just to tickle you, pushing your legs down so you can’t run away from him.

NISHIMURA RIKI !

— kisses your lower lip

niki is very passionate when it comes to you, and kissing your lower lip to him shows a lot of passion and it’s an intimate gesture.

you and niki don’t spend a lot of time together, since he has a very busy schedule and you still study, so when you both have time together you spend it at home enjoying each other's presence in each other's arms.

niki starters leaving cute and short pecks on your lips, until you hold his nape making the kiss linger for a little more.

he pulls back and leans down targeting your lower lip, taking it between his plush ones.

the action makes your heart flutter and your cheeks heat up, especially when he bites your lip while pulling back and watches your flustered reaction.

— kisses the top of your head

niki finds this such a nurturing and loving gesture. it’s also a comforting kiss for you.

he loves hugging you and since he is so tall he rests his head on top of yours as he embraces you.

when he knows you are feeling more gloomy and down he will just come up to you and hug you, letting you release all your emotions.

he rubs you back comfortingly and hugs you tighter as your sobs grow and you let out your cries of sadness.

when you calm down he pulls back a little to wipe your tears and kisses the top of your head, letting his lips linger there and your breath calms down.

[bettysupremacy]

HI oh my goodness i just flashed through ur entire page (its LOVELY writing) and i desperately need more!! I noticed the lack of Remus request so here i am B)

OKAY could I request plot for before remus and the reader are together? Like how they came to be ^^ mm maybe like "coincidentally" him running into her at her favorite bookstore or coffee shop (ITS CLICHE IM SORRY BUT I LOVE THESE LOCATIONS) until he finally asks her on a date !! (and maybe his friends spying on him just becuase hehe)

thank uu

HELLO I appreciate the support and there definitely is a lack of Remus. It’s cliche BUT CUTE! thank you for the request babe!!

“But I can’t just.. talk to her.”

“Why not?” James deflates. “Girls love that!”

They sit at a tiny table, in a tiny bookshop, in an even tinier cafe built in. The air crackles with cedar wood and vanilla, swirling around his hazy mind. It’s cozy and intimate but he has no place to put his legs, he sits awkwardly, leg bouncing anxiously. It accidentally hits the table. Sirius flinches from his mug.

“I’ll scare her.”

“Well then,” Sirius stirs his coffee. “don’t be weird.”

They came to study- or rather Remus came to study and his shadows came along. It’d been fine at first, computer out, a quiet Sirius. But Sirius has never had the patience to play quiet for long, especially when James is near.

“Maybe I’ll just leave it..” Remus murmurs.

Two voices shout at him. “No!”

Remus flinches mouthing sorry to the people around him. Sorry students he’d burdened with his rowdy friends. Hands to a sticky table, he pushes up. “M’Kay, I’m going.”

His feet feel heavy. He wants to do this, he wants your number, but god he doesn’t want to do this. Rejection is enough, but rejection in front of his two best friends? Looking back at his table, James encourages him. Two thumbs up and a hopeful face.

“Oh, shit!”

He’s crashed into you.

“Oh,” you startle, stumbling.

James and Sirius sink into their seats behind you. “Wow.”

Remus stabilizes you. “M’so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he cuts you off.

“No seriously, shit, I’m sorry.”

You laugh, high and sweet. “I’m fine. At least there wasn’t coffee.”

“Has that happened?”

“Yes,” you breathe a laugh, dusting off your pants nervously. “before an interview.”

“That’s awful.” He’s genuine.

“It was kinda,” you ease. “they weren’t nearly as nice or attractive as you.”

He swallows. He thinks your pretty, very pretty. His eyes catch on your lips, your eyelashes. That’s a weird thing to notice, right? Eyelashes? He’s usually smoother than this, he wishes he was smoother than this. He’s embarrassed.

You flatten over his doubts like you can read his mind. “I’m clumsy, we can say this was my fault.”

“Noble.”

You shrug. “It’s not far from the truth.”

“Not very chivalrous of me.” He laughs a little.

“It’s okay,” you’re comforting, he likes that. “Did you need something over here?”

He scratches his neck, speaking before he can himself.

“Do you wanna,” he doesn’t know what to say. He started the sentence and backed out too late, but you stand there with patient eyes. He swallows a whine. “I’m usually a lot smoother than this, yanno?”

You laugh unabashed. “It’s okay.”

“Falling on you like a building threw me off, I’m sorry.”

“Let’s start over?” You ask. “What’s your name?”

“Remus.” He sounds a little more confident. “I was over there,” he points to James and Sirius who wave. “and I thought you were pretty, would you wanna get drinks sometime?”

You hold back a laugh at the formality of it all. “Yes, do you have a cell?”

“Yes.” He breathes, pulling out his small phone decidedly. He doesn’t rarely use it, ‘cept for plans. Skipping past texts from James, Sirius, Lily.. etc, he opens the little contacts icon. He doesn’t ignore them purposely, he just prefers to call.

“Here,” you smile, taking the phone from him gently. “this is where you can reach me if you want to buy me another cookie.”

He looks down, he hadn’t noticed the fallen treat.

“Don’t” you start firmly with an easy smile. “say sorry.”

He laughs, holding back another sorry. “I’m free tomorrow.”

“Perfect.” you reach down to point at the pen in his pocket. “Can I see that?”

He nods, pulling out the pen for you. It’d been abandoned at the same time he’d realized studying was no hope. His fingers brush against yours as he gives it to you, but you don’t let his hand far. Gently grabbing it, you look up at his confused eyebrows for a confirmation. A gentle can I?

“Oh,” he breathes, nodding. “go ahead.”

You take the pen to his skin and work the ballpoint over the rough surface. The ink bleeds into him as you write the address. You notice his scars, jagged deep tissue, and ignore them. His ears heat up. “Really good drinks here,” you explain “and next to a bakery.”

A laugh stumbles out of his lips before he can stop it and you look up to grin. “Noted.”

Letting his hand go, you watch him bring the scribble up to his eyes to read it. It’s messy but he thinks that has something to do with his scars rather than you.

“Time?” Remus asks, and you grab his hand again, writing a messy 8PM under your other ink marks. “I’ll uh see you there.”

“Perfect.”

He turns to walk, almost immediately turning back and grabbing your arm quickly. “Wait, what’s your name.”

“Y/N.”

“Remus.”

“I know.” You laugh.

He knows you’re not laughing at him, but he cringes anyway as he walks back, heavy with embarrassment, triumphant with the thrill of a date. the boys pat his back when he sits down.

“Poor thing.” Sirius consoles.

James scoffs. “He got the date!”

“But still,” Sirius sulks. “that was embarrassing.”

Remus glares. “Thanks.”

“Well go on,” James starts. “show us the writing.”

Remus sticks out his hand for the boys to see. They hum mildly, looking at him with approval. “Nice bar.” Sirius nods.

“Next to a bakery.” James affirms.

“I, uh,” Remus scratches the back of his neck. “made her drop her cookie.”

“You dickhead.” Sirius laughs.

“I didn’t mean to!”

He slumps in his chair as James hits Sirius. They argue, petulantly and boyish, and Remus looks away. You stand at the register buying a book he doesn’t remember you holding when he’d knocked into you. Smiling at the cashier you grab your change and the bag of goods you bought. He feels weird watching. This has got to be weird, right? But as you walk out, you glance to him, lifting your hand up to your ear during the doorbell chime.

Call me.

[sunshinereddie]

credit to @gloomy-prince for indulging in this hc with me but im imagining a little while after famous comedian richie tozier randomly went MIA for a few weeks, then returned to social media with an announcement of his new boyfriend, that richie begins doing livestreams on instagram.

he mostly starts doing it to promote his new show and upcoming tour, he'll answer questions and tell stories- and it's during these livestreams that his fans begin to learn more and more about eddie kaspbrak, richie's new boyfriend.

the first time eddie made an appearance was accidental- richie was in the middle of talking about his long day on set, when the door behind him opened and a man walked into the room, looking down at his phone as he asked, "richie, have you seen my-" before the man looked up and noticed that richie was streaming. he begins to apologize, and starts backing out of the room, but richie stops him, wheeling back in his chair and grabbing the man's arm, pulling him close to the camera and announcing to his followers, "everyone say hi to my boyfriend!!!"

after that, eddie starts to make regular appearances on richie's livestreams. sometimes eddie will just pop his head in to say hello, sometimes he'll sit with richie and answer a few questions, sometimes he'll just be in the background of the video doing his own thing. but there is one thing that is consistent with every livestream- and it's that richie's fans adore eddie. richie gets hundreds of dms asking him to livestream with eddie again, eddie's instagram account goes from having 17 followers to 20k, and whenever eddie makes an appearance on the livestreams, the viewer count always seems to go up.

but it doesn't stop there. now that eddie has a small following of his own (for a reason that eddie cannot fathom), his followers start asking him, "hey we love you on richie's livestreams, you should also do livestreams!!" and of course eddie is confused he's like "guys, i appreciate the support, but what on earth would i livestream about. my life is not that exciting." but his fans don't care. and so, that's when eddie kaspbrak does his first livestream: a 3 hour stream of him sitting at the desk in his home office, typing away at his computer and drinking coffee, in complete silence other than the sounds of his keyboard. he doesn't interact with the chat, he doesn't even look at the camera the entire time....... but his followers seem to love it.

and so, eddie continues. he mostly does streams of him working- now that he's working from home while recovering from his derry 2.0 injury, he spends most of his days at his desk, typing away on his computer. but sometimes he'll stream other things, like when he's putting away dishes or cleaning the house....... and that's how eddie kaspbrak accidentally becomes an asmr/relaxing video livestreamer.

all of his fans love this for him. and while he started off with a majority of his followers being richie's fans, it's not long before eddie gains some followers of his own, who are following him solely for his content. he even has some fans of his own who love his boyfriend, and get excited every time richie makes an appearance on stream.

and now that both richie and eddie have their own little niche followings on the internet, it's quite amusing for the both of them to watch their followers' reaction every time they post about each other on social media. you've got eddie's fans who are surprised to learn that this random asmr livestreamer is dating celebrity comedian richie tozier, and on the other hand you've got richie's fans who are surprised to learn that richie tozier is dating that popular asmr youtuber.

[thatdeadaquarius]

When I’m playing genshin, I’m mostly listening to either Paternity Court, or Steve Wilkos. Imagine the characters hearing all of the stuff and being so scandalized by the results and comments. Or being genuinely disgusted and heartbroken for the victims in more serious cases. I can def see a good chunk of them being invested

I don’t think I’ve listened to those yet! I do occasionally get on a true crime binge listen, however the weirdest thing my characters have heard has gotta be Game Grumps episodes or compilations lol

What if i listened to every season of Buzzfeed Unsolved.

What would we do then my Genshin characters, my people, what then.

I saw someone else write about this true crime documentary thing but they described everyone being pretty terrified or disgusted by the podcasts

Which I definitely think some would be literally horrified lmao

But also I think a lot of them definitely would be invested-

I mean shit,

you're listening to your God and they just start playing this like uncomfortably detailed intricate crime case/murder report???

I would be so interested in what kind of person they were, and why they were listening to true crime stuff, 

so needless to say characters like Heizou and Yelan would definitely be into it, maybe Kujou Sara as well?

I can see Zhongli getting into it too and Raiden

I mean don't get me wrong plenty would be disturbed

like rest in peace Barbara 🙏

but like it would be fascinating to them too!!

cuz they don't know anything about our world so they could learn a lot about it thru listening to this stuff

tho it probably cause a lot of confusion whenever they hear things like phone or computer or car lol

you know stuff that hasn't been invented yet for them or there is no equivalent, but they

would deffo interrogate u about ur world when u get to Teyvat

♤

okay but on a more silly motherfucker note-

what if I was playing Game Grumps around them lol, would they be like oh my God our Creator has the best comedians or hilarious friends

like you know how a king has jesters? 😭

I feel like they would think that instead of a recording definitely, especially because most of these things are just people talking and not like, a speech or something

because audio recordings could exist for them, they would probably get it in concept, they do have Ley lines that do that afterall (and now Kameras)

♧

Omg,

oh no, would they think that you're getting these reports in person??  Or even like your SOLVING all these crimes?? 

esp bc I know myself and I tend to sometimes be talking to Genshin characters like,

"damn that's how he got arrested? How stupid he could've blah blah blah i sound like a hardened cop playing a gacha game lmao blah blah...."

it'd be so funny to see that one play out

when u get whisked away to teyvat and Heizou and Yelan are just:

"oh my God can you help us with all these cases we love your mind, or get your servants to help us?"

THEY WOULDNT EVEN BELIEVE U IF U TRIED TO BE LIKE "no no please ur the professionals idk wtf im doing guys-"

Heizou/Yelan: 🤨🤨

"likely story Most Honorable God, but we heard quite the fascinating theories just last week before u descended, hmmm...."

u cant win, 

honestly everyone would probably just assume ur not only the god who created/built teyvat but also have a domain in justice, comedy or honestly whatever u be playing all the time, including music, people would definitely think ur a music god too

esp if ur like me and u just turn on a cool Spotify playlist while u play sometimes, like they've probably never heard so many radically different genres songs, and so many back to back

(could definitely see a myth about u having an immortal inexhaustible musician band that has access to all the songs of the universe that u make them play for you, once again, would be hard to deny bc that's a pretty accurate description of spotify lol)

♡

srry abt my ✨️ass writing✨️ anon!!

I am getting to these old asks so late I hope u guys r alright with getting answered so late, ya boy has been busy 

Im busy partially bc i have a end of year art exhibition!

Basically at my university, if ur an art major, u have to have some of ur best work from ur time at university and display it in a Senior year art exhibition in the university's art museum! Its super cool! And stressful! :D!!

Anyway im so happy i have no object permanence bc everytime i open my drafts or my inbox, even the old asks :( , are  a new surprise every time :D lmao

Safe Travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[socstudies]

Hi, as someone who is going to be in their first year of college this fall, I'm curious about the note taking part

Is physical or digital note taking easier?

Is spending money on a laptop nessesary?

What is something you wish you would've done differently during your first year?

Do you have any advice?

If by any chance you see this, your blog and your aesthetic are amazing!

I'm wishing you a wonderful day/night.

If you do decide to reply, thank you in advance <3

helloo! sorry for the late reply & thank u for the ask! :)

ive tried both and i think i prefer handwritten notes, however they both have their pros and cons:

handwritten pros

proven to be better for retaining information

can't get distracted by other tabs

lighter to carry

costs less than a laptop

i've had some classes where we weren't allowed to use laptops so it's good to already be used to taking notes this way

cons:

much slower. sometimes i find im missing stuff and i have to go back to it at the end

have to print out diagrams etc if u want to include them

could possibly lose them, spill something etc

not enough space on desk for both laptop and notebook so u can't get slides up or google something

digital pros:

much quicker

easier to organise & pull up different notes at any time - u don't need to carry around or find older notebooks to be able to study or refer back to past classes

some people make notes directly onto the slides which u would have to print out if u wanted to do by hand

can also use for research and writing essays which u will need a computer for at some point so might as well do everything in one place

cons:

expensive

more stressful if u lose or break it

if u forget to charge it and u don't have paper .......

this upcoming year, im using a combination. most of the time i'll handwrite my notes, but for classes where they talk too quickly i'll type them (it's not worth the stress & extra time having to go back to recordings after). my notes for readings will be annotated straight onto the pdf. i'll be taking pictures of notes to put them all together.

---

unfortunately, i think it is because you'll need computer access to research and write ur essays, as well as to find course information etc. HOWEVER some universities (most?) have laptops that u can borrow and computers in the library, so if u know that you'll be motivated enough to get up and do all of ur work on campus, you could save this cost - bare in mind when u move off campus after first year it might be even harder. definitely look into this if cost is an issue for you! it doesn't need to be a fancy one if u do buy a laptop though, just remember u'll be carrying it around so don't get a super heavy one!

---

as for something i wish i'd done differently: as a sociology student, none of my classes have exams where i have to memorise things, instead it's all essay based. this led me to not 'study' i guess ??? like the stuff that i wrote my essays on, i knew like the back of my hand, but everything else i couldn't remember well. so if ur taking an essay based subject, remember that u still need to study a little & remember these things !! i was so overwhelmed tbh that i forgot about this oopsie!

---

extra advice:

when people say that after u skip one class, u'll skip the rest THEY. MEAN. IT. literally try so hard not to miss class bc you will never go again if u do. my classes would start off with not enough seats for everybody and end up with just a handful of us by the end of term.....

make time for urself !! it can become all consuming, especially if u live on campus, but pls make some dedicated time away from studying !!

u will find ur friends eventually. pls remember that it won't last or be that fun if u stick with friends who u don't have that much in common with just bc they were the first u met. tell me why i was going to bars and clubs with people in first term bc that;s what they wanted to do ????? it's ok to move onto different people bc u will eventually get tired of doing these things u don't like just to be able to hang out with people !! now i go to bookstores and cafes with my new friends and i love it!! don't settle !!

[raayllum]

im new to the fandom, so I miss a lot of the discourse (helped ofc by the fact you're kinda the only dp blog I follow), so everytime you mention the s4 backlash I'm like....how in the world could people hate that season or rayllum in it? It doesn't compute for me!

The last ship I was particularly engaged with, has a lot of similarities with rayllum. They were best friends, life partners before they were ever /romantic/ life partners. And they went through a /lot/ of trauma, miscommunication, and being on opposite sides of the same fight, etc etc.

the difference to rayllum was that they never rlly gave each other the grace they need. They also never talked on screen, but unlike rayllum it wasn't because it was the best option for them, it's just that the writers didn't want to include it ever - to the point that when they finally did an episode addressing it, it landed...very flat? Because it was about six seasons in, addressing things as far back as the second season, that they'd apparently never spoken to each other about before (they were tragically engaged when this happened).

Rayllum GENERALLY but especially in s4 have a really special place in my heart, because they feel very realistically messy - but it doesn't feel like it's there so there's some drama to keep audiences hooked. It feels authentic, and is one of those rare cases where it strengthens their relationship. I definitely could buy that rayllum would survive anything that hit their relationship by the end of s3, but getting to actually SEE that and see how much they're willing to work through out of love and respect for each other? Fantastic.

(also like it's such good character development....i am with u in the s4 defense squad. is there a squad? If there is I'm in it)

First off welcome to the fandom and I hope you're having a good time!!

The fact that my blog is mostly discourse free cause while I tag accordingly (fandom nonsense and dragons gets salty for potential blacklisting purposes) I always worry I can dip too far into that on occasion (I do my best not to unless being called out by name, and even then mostly do my best to ignore stuff), but there's not too much discourse within TDP in general — at least not in the Rayllum corner, luckily.

I think that's why the S4 backlash really surprised and threw me for a loop, because my partner and I finished the season at like 7AM on release day and while different than expected, we loved it and thought it was great from the start. Then we went online and people in the fandom who I'd largely always agreed with were having a really hard time with the season and it was disheartening at least to not have many people to talk to about why 1) S4 is TDP's thematically strongest season thus far and that's still true, 2) it's Ezran's best season imo, and 3) it does a lot of things really really well in really interesting ways.

I always try to never come down Too Hard on the s4 backlash just because people are of course entitled to their feelings/opinions then as well as now (even if some people's tunes have definitely changed), but a lot of it did feel sometimes short sighted if not immature.

Like soo many people are still mad that Rayla and Callum broke up in an offscreen graphic novel, when S4 would still be S4 regardless of whether TTM existed and like... if Rayla worrying that she failed (again) and went off on her own (again) to protect Callum was a big logical leap, then that person honestly just wasn't paying attention; there's not much else to say there. I also think it's just a strange choice to assume that Nothing Major would change the second you find out about a timeskip; like, almost everything else is status quo, Rayla being gone is the One Major Change and people couldn't handle that being a Surprise?

Like you said, conflict between a couple is not inherently a bad thing; it can be good and interesting, and this was always a relationship hurdle I think a lot of Rayllums (myself included) expected Rayla and Callum to have to tackle. Not liking how extreme or 'dramatic' it was (ie. season long arc > just a few episodes, or Rayla leaving > just trying to leave) is fair enough, but given that it's rooted in so much of Rayla's character, I'd much rather take a long way around approach that's in depth. I'm also just Glad and Grateful that the show is tackling it and treating it like the issue it is rather than sweeping things under the rug.

The fact that Callum's version of anger wasn't the one people wanted is another issue, but again — his anger went the way I'd always thought it might if he just went through enough trauma, and even if he had yelled at her, I don't think the season would've necessarily gone any different than it did other than them crying more early on. Which I've written and wouldn't have minded, but I also don't dislike the alternative route canon took — of course they were never going to get all variations out there, but Callum is cold as hell and being a bit of a jerk while also being valid and tempering himself because he doesn't want to hurt her anymore than she wants to hurt him (and Callum has always been very very bad at being/staying mad with Rayla or Ezran anyway).

I saw a lot of pushback against Rayllum being 'platonic' (which was annoying as an aromantic person lemme tell you, as though platonic is lesser), being "broken up for no reason" (Rayla being hyper-independent was not a secret and always going to be what threatened to rip them apart; they are also still Visibly and Repeatedly In Love with each other how is that broken up), or that they didn't get to have a Big Feelings Time in S4.

With that in mind, there's a lot that also matters in a relationship beyond just Open Communication, tbh. There's going to be times in life where you're not able to or unwilling to talk about certain things (given that S4 is maybe a week, I think that's reasonable; especially when Rayllum still haven't talked to each other about it as of s5 and no one I saw have an issue in S4 about it has complained about it there) and like... how do you treat each other when you're still mad or confused and haven't talked everything out? Do you still take care of each other, are you still doing your best to be considerate of each other (even if you're also not going to be perfect)? That shit matters just as much if not more as people able to sit down and hash things out.

I think the truth is a lot of the things that pissed people off about S4 would've been true even if the opposite things had happened:

N'than is flat and under developed unlike Ellis → N'than is more developed → why is N'than taking away from screentime for other characters?

The Sunfire plotline feels disconnected from the rest of the story (nvm that Viren's arc from 1x06 onwards doesn't affect any main character again until 3x04) → the Sunfire plot line has more connections to the main cast crammed in → more complaints about pacing and things feeling overly stuffed, as scenes already change from one to the next quite clearly

Callum and Rayla have a big talk sometime between 4x03-4x07 → this doesn't give Callum enough time to be angry / makes him seem unreasonable because he's admitted he was mostly worried but is still not fully letting her in despite her spilling her guts to him (and in what world would Rayla give excuses, again, when she knows he's the one hurting and taking priority in her mind)

S4's humor was bad because there were fart jokes (in one episode) → the crowlord's joke is so much worse than the fart jokes imo and is on par with the walnut joke in 1x06. also 1-2 scenes with jokes that didn't work for you out of 9 whole ass episodes is like. you're just a wuss i'm sorry

The Sunfire plot line is boring → will never not feel like "I just can't connect or be interested in politics and religious disagreements when it's mostly about Black people for Some Reason (racism)" to me tbh

There was no way to please everyone especially after a three year hiatus (because people think, For Some Reason, that how much time it takes for a story to come out should change how that story is written and it really, really doesn't) but yeah. The internet showed their asses and I was Not Impressed lmao

TLDR; a lot of the S4 backlash was "I'm mad this isn't happening now and I'm stressed out/worried that it won't be" as opposed to "this is only a problem if it never happens at all, but I have faith that it will," and I will love S4 forever. The Callum-Viren parallels being ramped up, the theme of duality and moving "doing terrible things for love" to the forefront with multiple characters (Rayla, Terry, Viren, Claudia), seeing Ezran step into his role as king, Callum's arc being shown > told, the set up for the possession plot line, Janaya's engagement and relationship development + Amaya and Janai's independent arcs? Chef's kiss. S4 is my best friend and its Rayllum dynamic is on par with S3 for me, and I am very grateful the fandom's attitude towards s4 and s4 Rayllum is a lot warmer / more reasonable now

When Callum says "unconditionally" in 5x01 and all their stuff in S5 we know and believe it because we've seen them fight and work so hard to come back from some pretty terrible brinks in imperfect ways, and I'll always love s4 for that. The most aspec Rayllum season by far

[restlesschilled]

TMagP 013

Note: As Always, I am a backer so this was written 23 April, 2024 and scheduled to be posted on 25 April, 2024

oh god its another episodes written by Alex

awww thanks odin <3

Im dreading this

PRE STATEMENT/ CASE

OHHH DATE TIME

THE FLIRTING

This is so cute but i cant trust it because alex wrote it

"that you dont know how cute you are" adshfjagdhflakshdf

WERE STARTING WITH THE BIG STUFF

"hi im from an alternate universe"

CELIA IS A MOM

JACK IS HER BABY

"i had a while few years when I first moved here"

IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO CELIA OR JACK I WILL RIOT

HOW DARE

SHES A SINGLE MOM

"that depends on your baggage. DISH"

"they were the first ones that didnt want me" oooooooo\

Alice's Parents are dead good to know

"most pathetic vague post shes ever scene"

"more wine" "please"

LENA OFFICE

GWEN MY POOR BABY

"is it my fault?"

MY POOR PRECIOUS GIRL

"were managing the bad guys" FUCK

CASE

this hold music is a BOP

i had to stop and have my friend explain public school in England to me because that is not the same thing as American public schools

oh lovely a "fiance guy"

a hedge fund guy what i mean is a hedge fund guy

Why in gods name, would you use experimental setting on a hedge fund/ investing app… when you have no idea what it does and it has a shit tone of disclaimers??? i get being desperate but that's just stupid

also the irony of this guy saying hes a good person when hes betting on people failing with hedge funds

do people even steal phones anymore?

i feel like they are not worth all that much and just have to many ways to tack them for it to be worth anything unless you are targeting someone specifically

yeah i figured they might have targeted him

im pretty sure this would qualify as inside trading somehow

betting against your own company and than tanking the company is very illegal

pretty sure betting you'll have a shit time and then making sure you have a shit time would be the same thing

basically this man is committing insurance fraud... but through a hedge fund

it just occurred to me hes calling from the hospital that's what the beeping is

also vertigo mentioned

he was attack by computer bugs lol

shitty "finance guy" gets whats coming to him asmr

post statement

okay i know sam probably mean "be professional" like stop with the flirting

BUT WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT I SOUND LIKE YALL HAVE BEEN HOOKING UP AFTER WORK SOMETIMES.

HAVE YALL BEEN HOOKING UP?

this is how i choose to interpret this this is my new head canon( it was already kinda my head canon)

But if you ever ask me to be professional again, I'm going to have to take a shit on your desk." ALICE

"you signed the official secrets act in your onboarding. And I know all your school friends say treason's 'bussin'' and 'fire', but it won't look good on your CV." i love her so much

"its fine when I say it"

this episode really said fuck capitalism didn't it

also do week need to talk about the fact that celia's son is named Jack Ripley like jack the ripper

WAIT A SECOND JACK IS A NICKNAME FOR JOHN/JON

DID SHE NAME HER SON AFTER JON?

[oreharuuu]

To be One (3)

Summary: Avoiding the game went well for you for a few days. But a talk with a friend might change that decision for the better or worst

Warnings: none

A/N: woop woop! Part 3 y'all, hope you like it! I had fun writing this chapter so it's longer than usual. A few of the accounts i can't tag for some reason so im really sorry T-T

Tag list:

@atinytinaa @hoeranghae1117 @yoongiigolden @canadagoose-monbebe @hwal0v3r @kirooz @dream-in-progress @cara-18 @tr3asureyou @babygurl-hoshi @svn-ways2hvn @kpoplover17 @drunk-on-hwa @stopeatread @starillusion13 @honeyymon @potatoe-life @callmesoltera @kuleo26 @lino-se @darkfairy102190 @seongwin

For the past few days, you're trying your best on ignoring the game with work and socializing. Sure you may not be the most social person ever, but you do have friends.

At the end of the week, Irene and Seulgi invited you to brunch near their workplace. Wendy and Joy were too busy so it's only you three.

The anomaly however was Yeri didn't show up.

Hell she didn't even reply to your message when the incident with Hwayoung happened.

You debated whether or not to ask Irene or Seulgi, but your curiosity won over as you cleared your throat before looking at the two.

"So," You started. "Have you guys seen Yeri? Or... talked with her?"

Irene chewed on her croissant as she shook her head, while Seulgi frowned. "Yeri? No updates on her, but Wendy did say that she's busy with work right now so it's probably why she hasn't been active on social media."

"Or replying to your texts," Irene continued. "I invited her to join me for dinner a few days ago but no answer. So she must be really busy."

"Yeah. Probably because of the new game her company's about to launch."

"Give her some space," Seulgi shrugged. "She's always like this when she's in the zone. Remember last time when she blew up on Joy when she spammed her during a meeting."

You grimaced at the memory, remembering how big the fight was that it made Joy and Yeri didn't talk for a month.

"Believe me, I do not want to relieve that experience," Irene sighed.

Soon the conversation shifted from Yeri, from work to relationship problems; you're glad it's taking your mind off the game and Yeri for a while. Irene said goodbyes first when her manager called her, cursing under her breath making you both laugh in amusement. Seulgi left after an hour, promising to take you and Yeri out for drinks when you all have the time.

Walking back to your apartment, you bought some snacks to eat when you're working. Thankfully the project did wonders to your company, so you're only working light tasks with your coworkers whilst waiting for an update from your supervisor.

"—Yeah! And then she stupidly asked me if I still love her?! Ugh, as if!"

You laughed at what your coworker, Yeonjun, outbursts along with another one, Soobin. Both were also in your team when developing the project, and you got along pretty well so sometimes you liked to call them or have zoom meetings together to spend some time.

"Hmm, told you she was delulu. It's like she's in her own fantasy land that she created," Soobin hums as typing could be heard from his side.

"Yeah," You agreed. "Remember when she visited our work to state she's the new intern? Holy shit was that a fiasco."

Soobin laughed even louder as Yeonjun could only groan. "Man, how could I forget that? Supervisor Kim blasted my ear from having him yell at me for hours."

"Not hours," You and Soobin replied together. "It's only like, five minutes," Soobin continued.

"Felt like hours," He grumbled.

Doing your work whilst talking to them made the bad thoughts go away, especially one residing on the corner of your computer, but you ignored it. What you can't ignore is how your computer likes to glitch and freeze when you're working.

Well, not your computer perse, but the programs you're currently running likes to have problems when before that it's totally fine.

"What the—Are you kidding me?" You hissed as Photoshop didn't respond, making you groan as you slumped down on your chair.

"What? What's wrong?"

"My Photoshop is acting up," You whined.

"Ha! What're you doing on Photoshop anyway?"

"Making your ass even more uglier," You grumbled towards Yeonjun, who squaked in offense.

"Awesome. Can you send that to me after you finished it?" Soobin asked as the both of you ignored Yeonjun's yelling.

"Sure. Maybe I'll finish it today since I've finished my part of the work."

"Wait!" Yeonjun yelled. "You're finished making the poster and banner? You've already sent it to Supervisor Kim?"

"Yup, a few hours ago. So relieved I actually finished it since my computer has been fighting me the whole time."

"Soobin! How about you?"

"Actually thanks for reminding me to email my work."

"Am I the only one who hasn't finished yet in the team?" Yeonjun gasped dramatically.

You hum teasingly, before remembering that he was the only one not finished yet. "Actually, yeah. Eunchae and Chaewon finished theirs already."

"Fuck!"

"Honestly, Yeonjun," Soobin teased. "We're only supposed to make posters and banners ideas for the next event. It's easy."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Just say that I'm lazy and—"

Crackling noise from your headphones cut Yeonjun off, making you frown in confusion before clicking back at the call, noticing how it's still going but their voices have disappeared.

"Guys? Hello?"

No answer.

You shrugged before ending the call, whipping out your phone before texting both of them.

You: heyyoo seems like we got disconnected

Soobin: ???

Soobin: wdym

Yeonjun: (name) you're still on the call

You're heart dropped, tension started to rise in your body as you scrambled to text them back.

You: what?? I literally disconnected from the call like a minute ago

Yeonjun: well i mean...could be a lag? You're not talking

Soobin: let's just end the call

Soobin: wanna call again?

You huffed, glancing back at your computer. Shaking your head, you decided to decline his offer, stating that you need to check your computer first if you want it to work properly.

Yeonjun: aight, update us

Soobin: yeah and send me that picture of yeonjun

Yeonjun: TRAITOR

You let out a small smile, sighing in relief because of their antics. You decided to restart your computer, of course after you saved the photoshopped image of Yeonjun. After it turned on, you checked numerous times if it's starting to lag or freeze as you open websites, tabs, or even applications.

Humming happily when you found none, you're startled when a call from Yeri rang from your phone. But the call ended before you could answer, making you stare at your phone in confusion. A text from Yeri seemed concerning enough for you to accept her offer.

Yeri <3: hey

Yeri <3: sorry for not answering

Yeri <3: can we call rn?

You sighed heavily at the reply, your heart easing at knowing that Yeri's actually alive and not dead in a ditch somewhere. Well, that's a hyperbole but you can't help but feel like that when your friends disappeared from the face of the earth.

Waiting for the call to load, you anxiously bit your lip as you waited for her. When Yeri's icon appeared, you quickly turned on your camera, waving sheepishly as you smiled.

"Hey—uh, do you mind turning on your cam? If you don't want to, that's fine! No pressure."

You're only met with silence, but you waited patiently for Yeri to answer.

"Yeah, hold on."

Shuffling could be heard from Yeri's end, before you heard Yeri move around stuff around her desk. She did had a lot of clutter, but the sounds coming from the call seems excessive. You frown hearing plastic water bottles and what you assume to be cans of energy drink fell down, making Yeri curse loudly.

Yeri finally turned on her camera but you realized why she's so hesitant on turning it on in the first place. It's dark in her room, the only light present is from her own computer.

Boy, did she look like a wreck.

Eyebags deep enough to give a hint that she didn't slept for almost a week, hair disheveled like she didn't brush it everyday, her room being a mess like a bomb was dropped.

"Yeri," You whispered. "What happened?"

Yeri looked away as she bit on her thumb, shaking her head as she sniffed. Her eyes glisten with tears as she gasped before looking back at the camera. "I—I tried, I'm working on the game. Alone! My team disappeared when I needed them, and now they're gone!"

You're eyes widen, jaw slack as confusion started to plague your mind. "Disappear? Like, Johnny?"

"Yes! I don't—I don't know where they are right now. I've tried texting them, I've called them, zero! Zero answers! The company's launching an investigation about where my team went, why I'm the only one left!"

You flinched at her voice, sounding loud and angry yet so small. It's obvious it's taken a toll on her, yet you can't do anything except listen to her and try to support her in the best way you can.

"And get this," Yeri laughed maniacally. "The company still wants to me work on the game, alone! Can you fucking believe that shit? They're trying to find people who wants to work on the game but noo they're too busy gossiping about how Yeri's a whore, Yeri's a bitch! We can't work with her because she's too difficult!"

You frowned, yet confused at what she's saying. Yeri seems happy working there, everytime you went out for lunch or dinner she always praises how her company is so good and caring towards their employees, that even Wendy and Seulgi are complaining about how unfair it is.

"Yeri? Hey, what do you mean by that?" You asked gently, trying to calm her down as she's only one second from a mental breakdown. That seems to shut her up, her mouth agape yet no voice comes out, before she's quickly wiping her tears away. You sighed before leaning back on your chair, deciding to not push Yeri further out of her comfort zone. It seems like she's having a hard time, but you don't want to force her.

"No—no, forget about that. Let's just talk, I need your help."

"My help?"

Yeri nodded. "I need you to continue to play the demo game, (name)."

Your heart dropped to the ground, coughing to hide your uneasiness from Yeri. You did sent her the list of glitches, even so far as telling her you don't want to continue playing the game after the last incident. But now you're conflicted.

"I—I know you're hesitant to play it, but I've tried to fix the game as best as I can! Your feedback is actually helping me make things right, and I'm really grateful. But now that I'm the only one working on the game, I can't talk to others people about it to make it good."

Man, she really does know how to pull your heartstrings.

"So...can you play it again, (name)?"

You glanced nervously at Yeri, playing with your fingers as you're having a debate inside your head on what to do.

"Can't you just...send the demo to Wendy or Seulgi? I'm sure they'll be happy to play it. I mean more feedbacks are better, right?" You offered.

Yeri shook her head adamantly, her shoulders tense as she continued. "No! I can't, if the company knows I'm giving the demo to people then I'll be fired. It's supposed to be confidential and I broke the agreement when I gave you that demo."

You groaned, holding your head between your hands. Of course it's not that easy, you didn't even think about the consequences you'll receive when playing a game that's not even released yet. Taking a deep breath, you looked at Yeri before nodding.

"Alright, I'll do it."

You're hoping the game isn't so bad after she fixed it.

♡

Pacing around in your room was not a good thing to do, especially to ease your nerves before playing that damn game. It's already loaded, the cutesy theme song playing in the background as you're having a breakdown before you play it. Yeonjun and Soobin invited you to go have drinks together, but you lied, saying you were busy hanging out with your family.

You felt bad, seeing as they're actually close to you now, but they reassured you that you could always join them on their nightly movie nights next Friday.

You took a mental note, wanting to actually join them because everyone seemed busy with work and other things.

"Okay!" You yelled loudly, punching the air repeatedly before sitting down, clicking the start button as the game loads. "I can do this! I'm not a pussy!"

Day 3

"Shit, it's only day three?!" You hissed.

Not having any time to complain, the game loads you to your dorm, reminding you to take classes to earn more coins and items. Everything seems...fine. Then again, you just started the game, so you're expecting a jumpscare midway playing the game.

Cautiously clicking from classroom to classroom, the task of doing mini games kinda made you relaxed. You're still tense, waiting for Hwayoung specifically to jump and surprise you.

But that didn't happen.

Instead, you're greeted with a new face, well two exactly.

A boy so tall that he could rival Mingi's or Yunho's height, with slicked back brown hair and an easygoing smile. Next to him is a girl you thought is an AI character, straight long black hair with a beauty mark under her mouth.

"Hey, fresh meat!"

The boy's deep voice boomed through your speaker, making you wince as you turned down the volume.

"Did you see a cat nearby? White with black spots and a purple collar?"

You, of course, wanted answered no. Thinking an option will show up, you're surprised the text box from Yunho's encounter popped up, making your hands hover on top of your keyboard instantly to type a response.

No, sorry. I didn't see any cat, just got here |

"Damn, good luck finding it, Karina."

"Oh shut up, Johnny!"

Johnny? Named after Yeri's friend who disappeared? You push the thought away, thinking of it as a coincidence. You've never even see the guy, why act so worried?

"Really sorry to bother you. My name is Karina, this is Johnny. If you see a cat with the same description please call us! We can't let the principal know."

No worries, but why can't the principal know? |

"Because the principal is a loser who doesn't like animals, so he'll call animal control to solve the problem."

"Johnny! Shut up or Seonghwa and Hongjoong will hear you!"

You hummed, curious as to why both of them are mentioned.

Why so scared? I think Seonghwa and Hongjoong are nice people |

"Oh, no one's denying that they're nice. They're just...very strict around what to do here."

"Rules are rules, and for them everyone has to follow it. If not you'll end up like—"

Johnny didn't get to finish his sentence before the game glitches out again, making both of them freeze as Johnny's voice paused every now and then. You anticipated this, trying to hope that nothing scary happened. Thankfully nothing did, as Johnny only continued as if nothing happened. Like his dialogue was cut.

"—Yeah, good guys. But really scary when someone's not up to standards. Well their standards."

You could see Karina rolling her eyes, making you giggle at their cute interaction.

"Whatever. It's nice meeting you, new kid. If you ever want to hangout with us, find us at the club rooms."

Sure! I'll be happy to come by |

"Great! Bye then, (name)."

"Peace out!"

There's the feeling of relief bubbling inside you, the interaction between Johnny and Karina made you a bit relaxed to face off any of the boys right now. Heaving a big sigh, you continued to play mini games and looking around the school.

Not encountering any of the boys, you suck up your fear as you debated who to meet first.

"Maybe I'll meet Yeosang first. I haven't seen him after the first encounter."

Confused as to which place you're visiting first, you picked the library, seeing as you've never actually visited the location before.

Surprise, surprise, Yeosang was actually already there. Surprisingly enough, he's smiling in your direction.

As if he's been waiting for you.

But you brushed it off as a coincidence. Yeosang's character beamed happily when he sees you, waving his hand as he tried to be quiet.

The scene changed as now you're sitting besides him near the window, the light perfectly illuminating his face, making him even more angelic.

"Hey, haven't seen you in a while. You okay?"

The text box popped up again, making you assume that maybe the system could change after a certain encounter. Changing from options to actually typing out the response. Then again, it's really impressive at how fast and human-like the response from the characters are, sometimes even fast enough to make you believe you're actually talking to a human.

Yeah, just...got busy with personal things |

"Well, that won't do. You're new here, relax for a bit. It's not like you have other stuff occupying your life."

You felt like it's a jab to your own real life, but you shrugged it off.

"Anyway, I realized we haven't spend that much time together. So, I was wondering if you want to stay here with me? I wasn't really studying, just wanted some alone time."

Alone time? Then am I intruding? |

"Nonsense, I'm inviting you right now. So, do you accept?"

Of course you agreed, wanting to increase your relationship with him since his percentage was still pretty low when you started. Maybe you'll meet San after this, remembering how the last time the heart didn't pop up for him.

Sure! I have nothing to do anyway |

For the next few minutes, you and Yeosang talked about vague topics, favorite foods, favorite animals; harmless stuff. But every now and then, you had a feeling that a few of the questions are very...weird and invasive.

"Where do you like to spend time out of school?"

"Have you ever dated before?"

"Do you like to sleep with stuffed animals?"

The last question made you glance at a few of the dolls on your bed, before lying to him since your real life persona should be different than the one inside the game.

"Hmm, interesting."

Was Yeosang's only answer before going back to innocent questions like before. The change of questions made your head dizzy as you're typing out what answers would suffice since you don't want to tell things in your real private life.

Yeosang stopped talking after the thirtieth question, seemingly frozen before smiling softly at you. You noticed how his eyes turned blank with no emotions before switching it up in the last second.

"Well, look at the time. I have a meeting with Hongjoong about club developments, so I guess this is goodbye."

No worries, Yeosang. I had a great time with you |

The heart finally popped up on top of his head, you predicting the percentage would at least be more than five percent, but the final number made you tilt your head in confusion.

37%

"Holy shit," You gawked. "From 2% to 37%?! That's wild."

As you're looking directly at the numbers, you didn't notice how Yeosang's eyes shifted away from you, lookinv around as if he could see the room your in. His face still smiling, before his eyes shifted back to you when he noticed you finally snapping out of your daze.

"I'll go now, (name). Goodbye."

With that, Yeosang was gone from the screen, leaving you with an empty screen. Remembering where exactly to meet San, you choose the gym as the next place. The only reason you chose that location is because of how buff he looks under his uniform.

"Can't believe I made that assumption just because of how broad his shoulders are," You grumbled.

Lo and behold, San was actually there. At first you thought he meant the school's gym, as in for sports and other school activities. But your mind is blown away when you notice an actual gym near the school area. And God must be somewhere laughing maniacally to himself as you saw how San is basically drenched in sweat, making the flimsy material of his top clung to his body like a second skin.

"(Name)! Hey, what's up?"

San smiled so brightly that you physically have to look away as if the sun just hits your eyes. "Focus, (name)! Don't be tempted by his cute smile!"

Hi, San! Nothing much, I have nothing to do so I was strolling around. I didn't know there's two gym's, what's up with that? |

"Oh! Yeah, I guess the school wanted to blow some of the money that they have, plus a lot of the students here wanted a real gym of sorts."

Still, pretty fancy for a school to have like two gyms |

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

Time passed as you continued to have a conversation with San, having a great time as he's always so energetic and fun to be around with. Suddenly remembering of the items you have in your inventory, you decided to use it to San since the heart didn't pop up for him.

Hey, San! I have a gift for you |

It seems like San didn't expect you to say that to him, as his face turned bright red before he smiled sheepishly.

"A gift? You didn't have too!"

You clicked on your inventory, deciding on the cute teddy bear you got on your first day. Dragging the item from your bag, you placed it on San's character, resulting in him smiling widely as he now holds the teddy bear in his hands.

"A teddy bear! How cute, it even has a little bow. Thank you so much, (name)."

Suddenly the heart popped up, squinting your eyes to look closely as the percentage was shown to you.

58%

You let out a shocked laughter. "Damn, I didn't know the items were that helpful." You're conflicted whether or not the items were actually helping that much, or it's just the glitch happening again. In the end, your objective to raise your relationship status with San was already done.

"Um, (name)? Even though you're new here, I feel like you're perfect here. Like...you're the missing puzzle piece."

Weird thing to say after receiving a gift, but you'll go with it.

Come on, I'm not that important for you to call me a missing puzzle piece |

You noticed the pout on San's face, yet you saw how his face darkens for a second, as if your words annoyed him.

"Don't say that! A lot of us say that you're perfect! Even though you feel so far away, there's always a chance you'll be much, much closer to us."

"And it's starting," You groaned. Did the creepy dialogue really had to be amped up after Yeosang? It's as if the game knows these things scare and annoy you at the same time. But curiosity did peek out of your mind, wanting to know why exactly San phrased it that way.

What do you mean far? I'm right here |

"You know what I mean, (name)."

No? I really don't, it's like your saying I'm not physically here when I am |

"It's...complicated. I'm not supposed to even talk to you about this or Hongjoong will get mad. Just know that we're always here for you, and I really do hope in the future, we could be together."

You really do wanted his words to affect you as much as he intended too, but you're still creeped out by his choice of words that you can't help but grimace at the thought. There's a frown on your face as you noticed San looking quiet sad, almost changing from his hopeful expression.

What's wrong? |

"Nothing—just that, you seemed hesitant to be here with us."

Your frown deepened when he said that, as if he could look through your computer screen to see the facial expressions you pull. You glanced away for a while, head disappearing yet your eyes are still looking at him.

You might be hallucinating, but you really thought San's eyes seems to follow your every move, his eyes now off to the side where you disappeared. He's still standing like usual, but you noticed how his eyes are silently trained onto you.

Creepy.

Suddenly, you wanted to prove a theory that just popped up inside your head, actually thinking you're slowly loosing your mind over this game.

You silently grabbed your phone, pretending to scroll for a few seconds as you discreetly tried to look back and forth between San and your phone. Nothing suspicious happens, just that San's pout deepened as seconds passed by.

You needed proof. Especially considering what Yeosang said to you earlier.

You pressed Soobin's phone number, turning it on speaker as you waited. You acted nonchalant, tapping your fingers on the table whilst you still glanced at the screen. San's pout was gone, only replaced by a confused stare as he stands there.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Soobin! What's up?"

"Eh, not much. Why you callin?"

"Actually," You moved away, now sitting on your bed. "I wanted to invite you guys to my apartment! Maybe a movie night, you know?" You continued, voice loud enough so your target could still hear the conversation.

"Really? That would be awesome! I gotta ask Yeonjun first though, I don't know if he has plans or not."

You glanced at your computer screen, noticing San now looks tense and furious as he only stands there, as if he's forced to listen.

The change of emotions are really weird, since you haven't touched the game since your call. But you continued, wanting to see what happens.

"That's alright. We could have movie night next Friday, you could stay at my apartment."

"Ooh, like a sleepover!"

You laughed at his enthusiasm, "Yeah, basically like a sleepover."

The conversation continued on, before Soobin excused himself as he wanted to meet his friend in a few hours. Bidding goodbye, you ended the call, walking to your chair before sitting down.

You hummed to yourself, placing down your phone on the table as you typed your reply.

You're acting really weird, San |

You looked at him, hiding your wince as San's face didn't hold his signature dimpled smile. His eyes holds a certain anger, his jaw clenched in annoyance as his hands turned into fists.

"Why did you do that?"

His voice came out gruff, as if he's holding back a growl coming out of his throat. You decided to play innocent, tilting your head in confusion before typing back.

Do what? I just stood here, talking to you |

"(Name), please, don't do that. It hurts us when you do these kinds of things without thinking about our feelings."

A scoff came out of your mouth before you could stop it, feeling annoyed now.

Jeez, I didn't do anything! What are you guys even talking about? |

"Inviting those—"

You waited and waited for him to continue, but nothing happened. The sounds of crackling came out of your speaker for a few minutes, before it stopped. You saw San's desperate face still on your screen, pursing his lips as he looked away. You're wondering what's going on until Hongjoong appeared, smiling as he now stands next to San.

"Hello there, (name)! Funny meeting you here."

Thought you had a meeting with Yeosang about club developments? |

He seems surprised at how blunt you are, but his smile turned into a smug one as he placed a hand on San's shoulder.

"Ah, that. We're already done talking. Seonghwa is handling it now, so I wanted to grab San for a few minutes to...talk."

You frown, already feeling suspicious about how sudden Hongjoong appeared.

"But, hyung! I was—"

"We need to have a talk, San. The others are already waiting for us."

You grimaced at his tone, already feeling uncomfortable at how scary Hongjoong was now.

You guys should go, I need to meet with a few friends anyway |

"What friends—"

"San!"

You jump in surprise, eyes wide at Hongjoong's outburst. San closed his mouth before glaring at Hongjoong, to which the latter only glared back. They seemed to be having a conversation only with their eyes, the tense silence made you uneasy before it broke when San spoke first.

"Bye, (name)."

Yeah...bye |

In a matter of seconds, both if them disappeared from your screen. You groaned loudly at the headache forming inside your head, massaging your head as you closed your eyes.

"Can't this game be normal for one day?"

You quickly continued on day 3, wanting it to end fast enough so you'll be done for today. When night comes, you hurriedly exited the game, closing it before turning off your computer. You sighed, standing up as you walked out of your room.

"I need a drink."

♡

"The coast is clear," Yunho sighed when he no longer felt your presence inside his body, his posture relaxing a little as he sat next to Mingi. "She's gone now."

"San, you almost crossed the line today."

"Almost? He acted way out of line for her to feel suspicious towards us!" Wooyoung screamed.

"Fuck you," San hissed. "Yeosang started first when he asked stupid questions."

"Oh, believe me, I know. I've already reprimanded him enough," Seonghwa darkly answers, crossing his arms as he stared at San. "Now, it's your turn."

"You all can't blame me!" San yelled, standing up from his seat as he slams the table with enough force. "You all heard her! She's inviting other people, other men, to her home!"

"No one's blaming you, hyung," Jongho sighed. "But we need to act normal after she didn't show up for so long. Do you want that to happen again?"

Jongho was only met with silence from San, who looked away as he shook his head. "No...I don't—we don't need that to happen again. I feel empty without her, I can't stand the emptiness. That's why I had to stop her!"

"We all do," Mingi shrugged. "But we have to be patient, especially if we want our plan to go well."

"I just," San sighed, slumping down to his seat. "I don't want her to be with anyone else besides us. We all felt the connection when her face showed up in our eyes. I want her to be here with us."

"We know, San," Hongjoong sighed. "It's not easy to only be able to watch her this way. So far yet so close. It's torture for only being able to see her for only a few hours, even minutes, for just one day."

"Thank God we're able to access her computer freely now," Wooyoung added. "Not interacting with her was torture. But I know I can't just watch her from a far in the long run, that's why we need to stick to our plan."

"Well, if we want to stick to the plan we can't just pinpoint and blame San here," Yeosang frowned. "All of the other trash needs to act as well."

Mingi and Yunho snorted at the way Wooyoung growled, slapping his back teasingly. "What? Got reminded of Hwayoung?"

"After the little stunt she pulled...I can't even be mad at Wooyoung for killing her," Seonghwa shrugged.

"Fuck her for scaring (name) like that! I can't believe she'll corrupt her own data like that," San growled, Wooyoung nodding along with him.

"Less trash to be bothered though, sounds good to me," Yeosang shrugged.

"We still need to keep an eye out on the new ones," Hongjoong hums, looking at a few folders on the table. The names are written on the cover, Hongjoong opening one of the folders, finding a picture of Hwayoung crossed out with a red marker. "They're a risk, but they were essential on pushing (name) back to playing the game."

"Pushing (name)? More like pushing her friend," Jongho laughed loudly, making the others smirk in union.

"Can't believe at how easy she complied to us."

"More like backstabbing. It's obvious she thinks her life is better than our darling," Yunho answered, the pet name slipping up from him making the others tease him.

"Can you blame her? We targeted her remaining friends," San hums. "Then again, she's really fucking stupid if she thinks we could make contact with anyone if they haven't played the game yet."

"Whatever, we'll deal with her later when our darling comes to our arms," Seonghwa huffed.

"Deal how?" Wooyoung smirked evilly, Mingi snickering alongside Jongho as they discussed the best way to torture said girl.

Seonghwa shrugged, yet the corners of his mouth are pulled into a maniac smile. "We'll see later. She's trash anyways compared to our darling."

[ainzys-yan-corner]

Yan! CEO: Raine Flynn

✩tw: stalking, mentions of kidnapping, yandere themes

✩ahhh my first oc fic!! im so excited and please feel free to give me any notes you may have!

yan! CEO who just happens to catch a glimpse of you from his office window. It wasn't uncommon to see new people up on his floor, workers are constantly coming and going but something was different about you

You looked scared and intimidated and he loved it. The entire time you were on his floor his eyes were trained to you, an obviously new worker who had no idea what they were doing.

Raine’s next days were spent researching you. He found out where you lived, what exactly you were to his company, your phone number, things like that.

Raine built his technology company from the ground up so of course he's going to be good at hacking and computers meaning spyware on all of your devices. You don't get s moment of peace anymore he is always watching

He has more than enough money so what better way to spend it than on you? Lavish dresses and expensive jewelry start showing up at your doorstep. Raine wants to see you wear them. In his mind it's a sign that you give into him

Once he starts sending you gifts then he will start talking to you in person. Calling you into his office to perform meaningless tasks, having you run errands for him and sometimes he just wants you in there for company.

Raine is possessive and slightly sadistic but patient. He will wait for you to fall in love with him so you two can have at least what he thinks is a normal relationship (you stay home and never go outside unless it’s with him and he does everything for you)

Raine’s favorite thing is taking you out to fancy dinners. Not events, dinners with just the two of you. He lives for showing you off but he wants your attention on him soley.

Raine would never hurt you physically but he is not against scaring you. Like i mentioned before he's slightly sadistic so he enjoys seeing you in fear. The worst thing about him is his possessiveness though. He is overly possessive and gets jealous when someone even looks at you

[i-have-dots-in-my-brain]

ayup mates, its me (that one fucking guy that shows up in your fever dreams to offer you garlic bread then fucks off into the void) (i think you need to get a therapist btw)

Call me dots or dot (not correct but when saying something belongs to me you use "dot's". idk why don't ask me)

My cara page (for art): https://cara.app/ihavedotsinmybrain

They/them she/her it/its ( welcome to the mad lab we do experiments with the funny goofy hjinks with the genders here)

TAG GUIDE : my art (self explanatory), dot's thoughts (mad ramblings) (extra note, there are two versions of dot's thoughts, the other one is with the phone version of ' so you can go look for that if you wanna see me posting from outside the comfort of my room and computer), dot’s travel journal (me on holiday), my persona (obviously just my persona) *prone to updates

dumbass who likes to draw ocs and shit. (posts like there is no tomorrow but also like i have all the time in the world) (oc x canon stuff also) (some fanart ig)

if you wanna find my (mostly serious) art, check out @dots-in-my-head (send me asks and dms on this blog) also i have started putting fandom stuff there too so if you want to get my fandom doodles you can look to there as well

still questioning sexuality but currently aro/ace? (idk i'm not in a rush lol) (i WILL dabble in the arts of questioning me sexuality on internet if you got problems with that shoo)

my loveley husband (@octoxxt, pls ignore this blog dude its embarrassing)

why do you need to know my age, ‘you a cop?

will not draw smut or NSFW bcs i will start howling with racous laughter and melt. (i don;t even read smut in fic dude what do expect me to be able to draw im a cartoonish obviously anime style inspired semi-realism but not really shitty doodle artist you put your hopes too high if you think i can draw a dick without making it look like a piece of middle school desk graffiti)

i've got a bit of a dirty mouth but everything is pretty vanilla . (i make edgy dumb jokes sometimes, but it's not my actual personality peace 'n love on planet earth okay) (any time i say i wanna kms IT IS A JOKE) (most of my posts are /srs i will mark it if its a joke i know the pain of not knowing if it was a funny joke or not i gotchu other autistic peeps)

please talk to me god i am lonely (i am serious about this i love it when people rb and scream in the tags it genuinely makes my day) (send me asks send measkssendmeaskssendmeasks—)

Absolute art machine(whether the art is good or not is a big question that i am not ready to answer) makes shitty animations sometimes idk.

Uses lol too much. Chinese, knows mandarin (translate the random messages for maximum brain damage) i don't know simplified but i do know traditional (please talk to me i need to practice my chinese reading skills) am i a furry? idk but if you're mad about it you can fuck right off (i have a couple ocs and my darling fursona)

am currently inbetween fandoms, fandoms i am (kind of) active in are hetalia, scp, dnd, genshin, pjo, bg3, apothecary diaries, jrwi riptide and csm (list is prone to updating because fandom is my support system) (you wont see my art for most of them but the brainworms are there and sometimes i let them take over)

old fandoms or the fandoms i lurk in (i visit them often): eddsworld, demon slayer, pokemon, vocaloid and wof. (also prone to updates as i remember stuff)

note : i am still in school and have a life outside the internet so stuff will be delayed (which is why i am only kind of active) (i go missing sometimes i am not dead life is just lifing for me)

Do not say anything about how cringe I am I know trust me (it’s a coping mechanism lol)

if you're concerned, you're very right to be. I am very incoherent (most of my life updates have actually devolved into cries for help, please talk to me)

also if you don't like my art or ships just leave(any critique about anything i make shoots a bazooka straight into my heart and behind the screen i crumble into a cartoonish pile of ashes and bones as i stare at the screen blurred by tears) (unless I ask for critique then i brought this on myself and i’ll walk it off don't worry)

(Both of my personas)

My flags (might be updated)

[freebooter4ever]

So you guys know i (try to) post daily doodles, and i have said before that i draw for about 2-3 hrs every night. BUT that also means i dont post about like 80-90% of the drawings i do each night. Today though, i've been thinking about A*I and my own relationship with drawing, and how utterly baffled i am that anyone would want to use it to like...draw for them..and how the concept that *tell a computer what art to do so i dont have to do it* is alien to me. So here's ALL the drawings i did tonight. The bottom one is the last one i did and the one i would normally post. And i want to talk about A*I without talking about good or bad end product. Because i dont care if im making the shittiest art in the universe - i still wouldn't use A*I. Not even as a ‘tool’.

If you've been around here for a while you know i have a love/hate relationship with my art. I write too, but writing doesnt make me so frustrated and angry that i want to throw my computer out a second story window. HOWEVER. There is a huge caveat to that anger.

It happens after.

You could look at it a little like hockey. Every game is fresh, right? I mean god knows the US made an entire movie about how every game is a new game and the odds could always fall in your favor no matter how stacked against you. So every drawing i go into it excited - like LOOK at that reference material, its gorgeous. The gesture is beautiful, the post is interesting, there is something about it that is just begging to be drawn. But then say you hit intermission in the hockey game and the opposing team scored a few points. And i step back and look at the drawing and realize i started to go wrong somewhere along the way. But its too late now, you gotta commit and keep going. And you do but somehow the final score is STILL 6 to 0 and thats when i want to flush all my art down the toilet and never look at it again. But its okay because the next drawing is going to start with a blank canvas and who cares what happened last time.

Ok maybe a bad example.

The product is never really what drives me to draw - i mean, sure i do like it a heck of a lot better when i have something /anything/ that i can post to show that im sticking with my everyday doodle. But its not a requirement to doodling. The process of drawing is always fun. Its when i come out of it and look at the stupid thing that im like ‘well fuck i fucked that one up again didnt i’, and THEN i get annoyed lol.

I dont sit there consumed with frustration over ‘gee i dont know what to draw’. This is never an issue. I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DRAW. Sometimes i avoid certain gifs/photos because in the back of my mind im like ‘yeah no, i havent leveled up that far yet, i cant do that justice’. But i dont want to admit the sheer number of images of geno alone i have saved. I think my biggest reference folder is still aoki and that has over two thousand screenshots - i dont think anyone will ever surpass that LOL. I have a never ending supply of practice art to be done.

The frustration comes when i have an image in my head and i want to get it down on paper so-to-speak (computer whatever). So - when im NOT using reference (or at least not an exact one) and am making an ‘illustration’ (ish). But again, the process isn't the issue. I like the act of drawing, i like the image in my head slowly taking shape, i like how vividly i can see it. Yall know how obsessed i am with personality - that's not just part of the drawing, that IS the drawing. And each deicision in the illustration is defined by the personality/character.

A computer can't fucking do this.

Could i maybe tell a computer ‘draw geno in the shower’. Sure. And it probably could. And if i didnt care about the process - if all i wanted was a very good drawing of geno in the shower....that probably would be fine. Maybe great even. Maybe it would be the best damn drawing of geno in the shower ever. And then i'd feel like shit because a machine is producing art that is more valuable to other people than mine ever will be. But holy fucking shit that ruins the entire POINT of drawing???? Why would you do that?

I mean, im sure yall can infer the entire point of the act of drawing geno in the shower. He's hot, he's wet. ANYWAY.

In my opinion, a person who wants the end product and doesn't care about the process of getting there....that person is not an artist. That person is someone who enjoys art, and probably thinks they have a lot of good ideas to make into art, but who doesn't feel that pull to make art themselves. They just want to buy art. And they want it cheap. And mindless computers being trained in seconds on the decades of creativity and hard work of art masters is a heck of a lot cheaper than a human.

And the hardest part of all this for me is how worthless this makes me feel - nobody wants you, they want that automatic button. Kinda like my dad that way (haha)

[tsudelune]

hello im back.. did u miss me🥺 probably one of my last requests for you since ion wanna pressure you, what about akito or touya with a s/o that can't communicate well? they can only communicate well online ♫♫ thanks in advanceee!

'' secrets i have held in my heart , are harder to hide than i thought ,,

- akito shinonome x reader, touya aoyagi x reader

a/n : hi hi hi! i know it’s like...august now, i’m working on requests a bit now since i can use my computer, so i’ll be responding and working on these in present time...anyway, you can always request, just only when my request box is open. you don’t have to worry about pressuring me. i just did both of the boys, doing god’s work rn (/j) sorry if it’s short...

warnings : none!

style : hc style (bullets)

- akito doesn’t mind that you can’t communicate well.

- whenever you have issues trying to talk to others, he won’t mind stepping up for you. akito is headstrong after all.

- he’ll need a little time to notice your patterns, when you get uncomfortable and those signs.

- he’d do the most sweetest things to comfort you in the moment. hold your hand, pat your head, anything.

- akito would sometimes push you to talk to others. (ok akito.) he’d want you to step out of your comfort zone a little.

akito, with a smirk : *pushes you in front of him*

y/n, in their mind, passive-aggresively : YOU PIECE OF SHI-

- of course, if you feel uncomfortable, he’s not one to be shy to step up for you!

- i’d feel like he’d be really considerate and thoughtful about this, but never shows it...cold yet caring i suppose.

- anybody who dares to come up to you and bully you, they’re done for.

- he’s like already STARING into them.

- they don’t ever try to annoy you with akito by your side.

- whenever you’re a little shy to tell him something, he has his phone ready. akito’s WAITING for that text.

- if it’s something around the edges of “i love you”, akito starts a wildfire (pt2). 

- bonus points if you start teasing him with your voice. akito gives up.

- once in a while, you can get frustrated at yourself for not being able to communicate well, even to your lover.

- akito understands, and tells you that there’s no need for you to rush. he thinks that taking your time and trying your best is enough.

- either you talk to him online, or offline, he still loves you in everyway!

- touya understands, and like akito, doesn’t mind. 

- after all, touya is also misunderstood for being blunt in his conversations with others. 

- when you get anxious to talk to someone, he’ll hold your hand and rub his thumb on it, in a way to comfort you. 

- i feel like touya would be (as always) such a gentle boy with you. he loves you a lot and he doesn’t want you to ever feel uncomfortable.

- he’d (gladly) scare those that are giving you a hard time.  (he might actually like doing it LMFAO)

- if he doesn’t scare them away, he just. he just grabs you by the hand and walks away. like..what?

touya, absolutely FED UP with (the person that’s bothering you)’s bs : *aggresive hand holding and muttering crap-talking them*

y/n, smiling while sweatdropping : so this is how touya’s like when mad...haha...ha...

- touya would apologize if the sudden contact made you uncomfortable. but...you don’t really mind, right?

- touya will gladly step up for you, just give him the sign! (eye glance, anxious motions, yk the deal)

- he really cares about you, never wants to see you sad or discouraged.

- when you tell touya that you need to tell him something through text, he nods his head and takes his phone out. STARING AT THE SCREEN. WITH PUPPY EYES.

- you can’t help but not send the message to admire his face a little bit...

- touya is still waiting for that message btw...!!

- if you decide to tell him, “i love you” he...goes blank. completely, blank. 

- touya would blush and just immediately run over for a hug (IM SOBBING I LOVE HIM)

- no matter what, he loves you all of the time!

[autisticgirliesbracket]

What makes Futaba Sakura from Persona 5 the autistic girlie ever of all time? Here's what the people have to say:

Futaba-related asks/reblogs: x This post will be updated after each round!

Image ID in alt text and under the readmore.

[Image ID. White slide with a screenshot of Futaba in the bottom left corner. She is surrounded by text boxes which read,

"She’s a hikkikomori and a hacker genius. She initially has bad social anxiety due to trauma and does not leave her room."

"She's just like me fr fr (im autistic girlie)"

"Generally described as being incredibly introverted and socially anxious, however having no problem opening up if the conversation is about something that interests her. She also has a deep interest in hacking and computers (if the protagonist claims to have built his own PC, she asks for the specific details on it, such as GPU, CPU, RAM, ect.) There are more details I feel are autistic but I'm not sure how to word them !!"

"Talks in Video Game references and wired expressions. At one point she leaves a conversation because an Anime she wanted to watch was on. Helped me come to terms with my own Autism. Covered her face with a weird mask and a towel (separate events) because she didn't want to show her face in Public. Gets pissed off that someone messes with the her Neo Featherman Figure (basically the Persona equivalent of Power Rangers or Super Sentai). Overall just a massive nerd."

"First of all: The way she sits . little gremlin girl. Second of all. Social awkwardness (she has SO MUCH). Third. She's 15 years old and an international hacker, i mean come on, you cant DO THAt unless youre at least a little autistic. 4. Constantly tries to wear things over her head to avoid being looked at. Five. Her room is the dirtiest place on the planet, filled with snacks and figurines etc. Sixth. Look come on please shes autistic"

"She has social anxiety, doesn't really understand social norms and relates a lot of her real life experiences to video games. She also hyperfixates on the things she's working on and says a lot of strange things without thinking about it."

"Futaba is intensely afraid of social interaction (living in her room for years, unable to exit the house without a meltdown), including her almost constantly wearing headphones (which, to be, read as sensory comfort items). She's only really comfortable around her close friends and family, around who she becomes a lot more excitable and energetic. She has deep and passionate interests in the things she loves, and tends to become hyper focused on whatever shes tasked herself with, even neglecting her own health during which. It's very easy to equate her love of video games to a special interest, as it influences the way she sees the world, to the point where she calls the main character her "key item", since he helps her agoraphobia, saying she needs to "level up" to improve her social skills. To top it all off, her voice actress, Erica Lindbeck, has stated that she played Futaba as if she was autistic."

"Girl had so much autism stored in her body."

"It is very obvious in nearly everything she does that they intended for her to be autistic. Literally just watch almost any cutscene with her and you'll see it (well. Ideally after her palace is taken care of since she's going through stuff and the 'tism is less obvious as a result)"

"she is soooo autism girlswag coded. When you first befriend her and hang out, the characters all have trouble sort of connecting with her, but once they realize they are being way too obnoxiously formal/normal they start asking her about stuff she is interested in, which then she talks very excitedly about. Im sort of passively watching someone play persona 5 so i might have gotten something wrong but eee she is so coded to me <3 and not in a bad way imo ik sometimes things can be TOO stereotypical but yknow yknow"

"Struggles with social interactions, special interest in computers and video games, her English voice actor intentionally played her with the idea that she's autistic."

"She's obsessed with and so good with computers she was a world reknowned hacker before the story even began, she struggles with interacting with people and was bullied through out her entire childhood for being "weird" and being able to memorize books and other things. Her outfits almost always include her wearing headphones (which i personally hc to be to reduce sounds) and there are scenes where she experiences sensory overload that turns into panic attacks. A lot of her character arc is about how after a personal tragedy she completely isolated herself from the outside world and now shes trying to ease back into interacting with people with the support of her family and new friends. When trying to connect with her, the quickest way they got her to relax and open up was when one character got her talking about an in universe sentai show she loves. Also her English voice actor said in interviews that she performed Futaba with her being autistic in mind because everything abt her character just reads as autistic and seeing someone struggle w the same issues I did was super important to me when i got into p5."

"Futaba is incredibly autistic-coded. She couldn’t leave her room or speak to strangers due to trauma, but she also was “quirky” before the trauma. She’s a computer genius and can get so obsessed with her work that she doesn’t hear or acknowledge other people. She wears headphones almost all the time and sits with her knees up (odd posture). Lastly, her mother was known to also be “odd” and was also very absorbed in her work. Autism is often inherited, so my personal read is that both of them are autistic. I’m missing lots of things I’m sure but she’s the best."

"All of her interests are special <3, major social anxiety, partially nonverbal (just like me fr), one of the only people she's constantly jokingly mean to is also very autistic coded which idk if that's a me experience but i can only be joke mean to other autistic people. allistics wouldn't understand. She cannot sit properly!!! Very important she has that autistic ball sitting position"

"She’s a genius hacker nerd who up until certain events in the game never left her room or her house due to trauma. She’s gets nervous and overwhelmed very easily once she starts expanding her comfort zone, but she doesn’t let that stop her. At certain points when she has to interact with people she isn’t comfortable with she puts on a disturbing doll head mask. At one point she has a miniature meltdown in the middle of a crowded store, because she tried pushing her boundaries a little too fast and got overwhelmed until the protagonist was able to find her. She loves anime and collects figurines and gets annoyed when her display of them is messed with. Her personality is socially awkward and kind of bratty when she’s comfortable and I don’t mean that in a negative way at all, she’s great!"

"very bad with people, obsessed with programing and Nerd Shit, i love her and she is very cool"

"she has a massive special interest in technology, her entire character arc is helping her learn to socialize, she sits like a GREMLIN"

"she is a epic hacker gamer girl so we are within the margins for trans and autism, she has a hard time with eye contact, she has intense social anxiety and wahooooooo she has the special interests !! on a side note she has chronic fatigue so damn just like me fr!! and shes so fun!! ack!!!" End ID.]

[esa-marie]

I like making spotify playlists so heres a masterlist.

I'm still updating a ton of these and if you have any suggestions for characters/ prompts i would love to hear it

Fandom:

Shirt music with success of upon people || Flesh Cousin || Regretevator

Mostly compiled of songs that are utter nonsense, or fit the idea of a disconnect between your mind and your body.

Toxic construction Yaoi || Mannequin mark and Wallter || Regretevator

Songs that are pining, but also sad. bc divorce.

I just love to dance || Big Mama || ROTTMNT

Big Mama talks about dancing a lot in rottmnt. I threw in lots of girl disco and some more evil-vibed songs, ofc. (I love her sm im a #1 big mama defender)

FUCK YES! || Karlach || BG3

Karlach's story means so much to me. lots of songs to do with fire/ inevitability/ general badassery.

Fate spins along as it should || Withers || BG3

This one is the most WIP bc im sourcing a lot of the songs from old 13th century manuscripts, which is harder than it sounds.

Various White Knight Chronicles Playlists ( Cisna , Ceasar , Eldore , Yulie , Leonard , Kara , Setti/Grazel ). Since the fandom is actually incredibly small I might make a separate post for their playlists.

OC and others under cut!

OC

'What is it?' 'Home.' || Zael Stormveil || BG3 tav

Zael is my first tav when I started playing BG3. Im developing her more as I play, and started a tag for her on this blog

Was I sweet once? || Anatasios || BG3 Durge

Even though I havent finished my Zael run, I started a Durge run. Still more WIP than other playlists, and is about resist!Durge

Comin' atcha live from Avalonia! :3 || Elliot || LBP OC

Elliot, also known as console kitty, is a tv celebrity in avalonia! Ill spare you the rest of their lore for now, but their playlist is full of silly goofy songs, and songs about not feeling good enough, for whatever reason :)

Spidersona [Spider: Null] || Eve || Project Eden

My spidersona universe (Project:Eden) uses a different titling scheme than my other playlists. Anyway, Eve was a computer program who was ejected into reality. She now has to figure out how to be a human, and what being a human really is.

The Lizard || Lilith || Project Eden

Eve's best friend, who knew her when she was just a program on a laboratory computer. She has a corruption arc :3 (dw she gets better. Kinda.) gentle songs, and some not-so gentle songs

Doc Ock || 'Ock || Project Eden

A scientist who was employed at the same facility Eve was created. calculating, colhearted, cynical. at least for now (enemies to lovers??? P). Science songs and love songs, ofc

The Goblin || Goby || Project Eden

His tagline is "Imitations Limitations"-- a fish man cyborg amalgamation that was trying desperately to mimic the structures of pre-awakened Eve. But, that didn't go well, for him or the scientists. Not nonsense, but definitely songs that teeter on insane.

You said you know a guy? || Vance || Rottmnt OC

Vance is a scavenger, they go above the hidden city and 'scavenge' for things to sell below. Energy is his name, an he lives up to it.

You dont know me. || The Ghosts Official Playlist

I have several WIP projects, and Pastries and a Poltergeist is one of them. The ghost inhabits this old, run down, 70s house and is trying to get Maya to move out. but she wont. Melancholy 70s

I need this. || Maya Dufour's Official Playlist

Recent college graduate, she's about to find out why this house was insanely cheap. Stubborn. WIP.

This is a story about beginnings || The Librarian's Official playlist.

Ill spare the story for The Dead World for now, but The librarians playlist is a lot of epic orchestral and some medival songs sprinkled in.

Squash and Stretch || Cross || AVA/AVM OC

Living in-between a sketched figure and a stick figure, Cross is ever stuck in limbo. lots of video game songs/ songs to pick them up.

GameDev!Donnie || TMNT SONA Official Playlist

Gamedev is stuck in the world of video games for now. He doesnt mind a ton, although he misses his brothers sometimes. Filled with upbeat/happy video game songs

Monsters? That's Outrageous! || Gwen || Doors OC

WIP, but songs relating to the timeloop shes stuck in or the game itself.

Got it!! || Tracey || White Knight Chronicles OC

Songs for when your not the main character but still trying to be useful.

Technically I have more OC playlists but I think that's good for now ahjhkdbSAhkadk

Other

GET SHIT DONE (via killer video game soundtracks)

Over 40 hours of video game music (as soon as i finish a game it gets shoved into this playlist. I might reduce it in the future but I like the absurdity of how big it is)

She blinded me... WITH SCIENCE!!! || Silly songs about science

Specifically songs referring to science. This started as a Donatello playlist but then i fully committed to the bit. This is also technically my most popular playlist for some reason lmao.

A New Ghost Town

WIP playlist for a fanfic I may never make (each song is supposed to be representative of a chapter/ the chapter titles) (if you wanna know its dp and Gravity falls crossover)

Again, you'll see more playlists than this on my account (shared) But heres the tip of the iceberg :)