#sonny carisi x wife

[megalony]

Main Masterlist

As my other masterlist is rather old and made on an old template, I decided to create an updated one with the main fandoms I'm open to writing for.

This is mainly just so it is easier for me and to keep everything neat and in order.

Evan Buckley Masterlist (911)

Eddie Diaz Masterlist (911)

Twisters:

Tyler Owens:

Just Hold On

Top Gun: Maverick:

Jake Seresin (Hangman):

Don't Worry Darlin'

You Called My Wife?

X-Men:

Charles Xavier:

Use Your Voice

Henry Cavill:

Collateral

Everything Will Be Alright

Like father, Like son (Series masterlist)

His Queen

My Hero (Series masterlist)

That’s my son

Look at us (Series masterlist)

Painless (Series masterlist)

A man named uncle (Series)

Chris Evans:

The Evans boys (series)

Little one

Sleepwalker

Soft Spot (Series)

Part 2

Law and Order SVU:

Nick Amaro:

Help A Girl Out

Leave Her Out Of This

You Are Home

Bed Rest

Little Flirt

Rafael Barba:

Courtroom Chaos

Safe in my arms

My counsellor, my lover

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Reliving the dream   (Series)

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Dominic (Sonny) Carisi:

Hostage

Stay with me

Purple

Abandoned

Close call

An eventful night

Elliot Stabler:

Baby boy

Screaming

House of the Dragon:

Aegon II Targaryen:

Say It Again

I Won’t Allow It

Little Dragon

Unworthy

Aemond Targaryen:

Lady of the Night     Part 2

Perfectly Inadequate

That’s a promise

[squadmuse]

THE BLESSINGS OF HOME & LOVE

A SONNY CARISI X FEMALE READER STORY

WORD COUNT: 1.2k - ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE

It was a chilly March evening and Sonny was glad to be finished with work for the day down at the precinct.

He was glad to be not working on the night shift tonight - the weather station was warning of the possibility of snow, and with the bitter wind that was already there, Sonny was already finding himself freezing cold as he sat in his car outside the apartment building where he lived with his wife.

A broad smile brightened Sonny’s face as he thought of you, his wife. It felt so surreal yet beautifully incredible to be calling you his wife, to be your husband. You were still newlyweds, only having married at the end of February, and after a short honeymoon up in Nantucket, you and him had got back to work quickly. He planned to take you off on a Mediterranean cruise and a proper honeymoon in the summer.

Grabbing his leather briefcase, a new one that had been a gift from you for his birthday last year, Sonny switched his car off and climbed out of the vehicle, locking it and stood onto the sidewalk looking up at the building. He knew you’d be home, you had the habit of bringing your work home if it wasn’t busy in the courthouse.

That had been how he had met you, one day at the courthouse, where you had been rambling away to Rafael about some case of his that overlapped with your own, as you worked as an Assistant District Attorney within the homicide department. You were beautiful and intelligent. Sonny had been blown away from the first time he met you.

After a year and a half together, you had married and as he wandered over to the building, Sonny couldn’t wait to see you, even though he had seen you before leaving for work that morning. Gregorio, the elderly doorman opened the door for the lanky detective.

“Evening, Mr. Carisi!” chimed Gregorio, as he held the door open. Sonny felt himself blush at the title as he stood to chat with the doorman.

“Hey, Greg! What have I said? Just call me Sonny!” chuckled Sonny as he stood in the lobby. He instantly felt the heat of the building start to warm him up, and it was definitely much nicer than outside.

Now it was Gregorio’s time to chuckle. “Oh you know me, I’m an old-time gentleman and habits die hard! How is the missus doing? I didn't see her earlier,” stated the doorman with a smile, which Sonny returned.

“Ah ya know, perfect as always!” smiled Sonny as he started thinking about you again. You were always on his mind.

“Young love, as they say, tell her I was asking after her, then will you?” asked Gregorio, as he moved to open the door again. “Don’t want to keep you either, bad luck to keep a wife waiting, I know that from experience,” added the elder man.

Sonny nodded and said his farewell, and with his long limbs it didn’t take long for him to reach the second floor of the building, to the apartment that you and him called home. He was glad to see that you kept the door locked. After all he’d seen in his career (although you had also seen some sights), it had been something Sonny made sure to reiterate to you - keep the door locked, even if you’re home. He had a key, and any guests would give prior notice about a visit.

Walking through the heavy door, Sonny felt himself relax instantaneously at being home and back to you. As he locked the door, he got a delicious smell waft over to him and Sonny felt his stomach rumble.

“Doll, it’s me!” called Sonny as he took his coat off and hung it in the hallway cupboard. “I’m home, and I’m likin' the smell of whatever you’ve got cookin'!” he added loudly as he took his leather dress shoes off and placed them on the rack within the cupboard beside your own court shoes.

“Sonny?” he heard you call from the kitchen down the hall as your head stuck out the doorway, to which he stood to his full height and out of the cupboard.

“Ya, just putting everythin' away! Know you like it all tidy!” he chuckled as he wandered over to your petite self, and brought you into a tight and loving hug and kiss.

Pulling away from the kiss, you rested your hands on the broad shoulders of your husband. He must’ve taken off his suit jacket sometime, and he looked very handsome in his white shirt and grey waistcoat and red tie. “Hello to you handsome!” you giggled, kissing him softly. “I’ll have you know it’s good practice, y'know keeping tidy…”

Sonny nodded, and he pressed his lips against your own again. He couldn’t get enough of your kisses. “I love you, darlin,” murmured Sonny, as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into him some more. The smell of your strawberry mint shampoo and the scent of your vanilla and jasmine perfume seemed to intoxicate Sonny as he stood there, just hugging you, his wife and best friend. “I can’t wait for that to happen, seein' how good you are now, I know ya will be the best.”

You couldn’t help but blush at Sonny’s compliments, and you playfully whacked against his chest, which made him laugh and his eyes crinkle. “Well, I think you’ll be even better!” you replied, wrapping your arms around his neck and smiling up at him. “Anyway, do ya wanna try out what I’ve been cooking up for us?”

Sonny nodded. He had not had time to eat much at lunch, just some god awful coffee and a vending machine sandwich. Usually the two of you would meet up for lunch, but you had been busy prepping for a case, and he had been chasing down a perp in Central Park. So to say the least, Sonny was absolutely famished, and he loved that you loved to cook like he did.

“I can smell rosemary and garlic?” stated Sonny as he sniffed the area. “Chicken too?”

You nodded. “My Nonna mailed me some old family recipes, so I’ve been trying them out… I hope you like pollo al mattone, sformato and then some torta della nonna for dessert,” you smiled, bringing Sonny into the kitchen by the hand, your hands intertwined.

Sonny groaned at the sight of the dishes you had ready and awaiting. You really did spoil the gastronome within him, but he did the same right back to you. “Doll, you’ve outdone yourself here!” grinned Sonny as he wandered over to the oven. “I guess you were a tad stressed today?”

You giggled as you joined Sonny bringing out the dishes and cutlery. “That Adams murder case is a mess,” you sighed as you passed the plates to Sonny, who placed them on the kitchen table. “I don’t like badmouthing detectives, but one lost evidence pertaining to the case, and it’s got Buchanan piling pressure on all angles for a mistrial.”

Sonny sighed. He hated that you got stressed out and that your cases ending up complex or screwed by external factors. “I know ya will get justice for the victim, you’re the best ADA I know,” he replied as he picked up the pollo al mattone with oven gloves on. “Wish you had better detectives though, doll, I’d move heaven and earth for you, whether it’s a case or anything else.”

You stood there, watching your husband move the dishes over to the table. Honestly, you had no idea how you had been blessed for someone as perfect as one Dominick Carisi Jr.

[daddydoddsjr]

Can you do a one shot where Sonny has a daughter and he's overprotective of her when she's dating?

Overprotective - One Shot

Pairing || Sonny Carisi x Wife!Reader, Sonny Carisi/Teen!Daughter

Contents/Warnings || implied threats

Authors Note || with posting this, i’m now all caught up on answering asks :) so anyone is free to send in an ask for literally any svu/criminal minds character lol. will also be posting an original sonny carisi au soon which will definitely be multi-part and explicit

“A boy? Seriously? A date???” Sonny looked absolutely dumbfounded.

“He’s a really nice guy, Dad, I swear,” You and Sonny’s daughter sighed, already knowing Sonny would act like this.

You and Sonny had been sitting on the couch together when your daughter had approached the two of you, all dressed up and looking nervous over something. And then she told you that she was going on a date… which you knew about, and Sonny did not. And for good reason.

“Who is this guy? Have I met him? Who are his parents?”

“Dad, calm down.”

“Well I don’t want some sleazeball taking out my daughter.”

“I’m sure he’s a nice boy. She’ll be fine, Sonny,” You gently touched his arm. “She’s old enough to make decisions on who she can date.”

Sonny huffed, calming at your touch, but still clearly annoyed at the thought of his daughter dating.

“Is he picking you up?”

“Yea, soon.”

“I’m a cab or a car?”

“I’m his car.”

“I’m walking you out there to meet him.”

Your daughter looked slightly worried by this, but shrugged, “Fine..” She paced around the living room as the three of you waited. When she eventually got the next that he was there, she begrudgingly told Sonny that she was leaving. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Sonny get up so fast, immediately asking your daughter if she had her phone, her keys, her paper spray, her jacket, her portable charger, her this, her that…

“Sonny?” You spoke up just before Sonny was out the front door.

“Yeah, doll?”

“Don’t freak him out too bad, okay?”

Sonny rolled his eyes playfully before leaving for about 10 minutes and coming back. He plopped back down onto the couch beside you.

“How did that go?” You ask, leaning against him.

“He seems… okay. I told them to be back before midnight. And they better be.”

“I’m sure they will, Sonny. She’ll be fine.”

“I’m still going to text her every 20 minutes.”

“Sonny-“

[tropes-and-tales-archives]

Sonny Carisi: Second Chances, Part One

WC: 1739

TW: Angst; break-ups.

AN: This is part of a mini-series. The rest can be found here.

AN2: This first part is Nick Amaro x reader. The following pieces are Sonny Carisi x reader.

You sat in the cool interior of your car, waiting for your boyfriend to finish up his physical therapy.  He would be a long road back, but he was making great progress already.

You had met Nick Amaro three years ago when you transferred into SVU from Major Case.  Back then, he had been married to Maria and partnered up with Olivia Benson, and you had been chronically single and partnered with Fin Tutuola.  You had managed to keep an admirably professional relationship with Nick, even joining him and his wife for a dinner party at their house once, but when his life fell apart with appalling force, you had done what you always do:  you swept in and helped him put it back together.

When he was struggling in his marriage with Maria and dealing with the duel issues of her being stationed overseas and his own bitter jealousy, you were there to reassure him that no matter what happened, he had a wonderful daughter.

When he was struggling to come to terms with his son, Gilberto, and the crushing guilt that came with not being in his life, you were there to reassure him that the important thing was that he was there for Gil now.

When he was struggling with his undefinable relationship with your coworker, Amanda, you were there to reassure him (through clenched teeth and carefully chosen words) that he couldn’t save everyone, and maybe Amanda needed to hit rock bottom before she got help.

You had loved Nick within moments of meeting him, but you never acted on it and it always felt like innocent puppy love anyway.  For a while, he was married, and then separated, and then divorced, and then hooking up with Amanda.  The whole time, you loved him from afar and supported him as a friend and just chalked the whole situation up to unrequited love.

It wasn’t until you were paired up on a case regarding a future monster, a man who had a torture room built into his home, that you became more than friends.  Nick had reacted badly to the man being acquitted, punching him and getting arrested for assault.  You helped bail him out shortly thereafter, and that night, you and Nick hooked up after he reached for you like a man who was drowning.

To you, it wasn’t hooking up, which made it sound casual and nonchalant.  To you, it was the culmination of more than a year of repressed feelings and one-sided ardor. 

You assumed that Nick was just blowing off steam, proverbially speaking, but he kept coming over to your apartment, kept spending time with you.  It morphed from just sex into dinner dates and lingering walks in the park and the occasional game at Yankee Stadium.  If he never said “I love you,” it was likely due to his abominable track record with women. 

He’ll say it someday, you reasoned with yourself.  Give him time.

Even when he was seriously injured in a courthouse shooting, a shot to the liver and one to the knee…even when you were there by his side, grasping his warm hand as he drifted in and out of consciousness…even as you smoothed his hair away from his forehead and soothed him as he wept about his police career.  Even then, though – he still didn’t say it.

Someday, you thought.

He was released from the hospital, and you moved him into your building because it had an elevator and a nice shower with a low step in – perfect for his continued recovery.  You used up some of your personal days to help drive him to doctor’s appointments and therapy.  Nick always thanked you profusely, pulling you in for fierce kisses while proclaiming that he didn’t deserve you.  Then he’d get a faraway look in his eyes, and you wondered what he was thinking.

When you caught him working through his finances one night, and when you noted how he hid his papers from you when you walked in, you wondered even more.  And when you saw a tab on his browser history about engagement ring values, you felt a pleasant churn in your gut.

So you waited for what came next, and in the meantime, you waited in your car for him to finish his therapy.

He exited the building twenty minutes later, still on crutches and with a fistful of papers clenched in his hand.  Your inclination was to rush out and greet him, open the car door for him, but you knew that he hated feeling useless, so you waited while he hobbled himself to the car and climbed in.

“Good appointment?” you asked, flashing him a bright smile.  He turned and smiled back at you.

“I’m officially done,” he replied.  He held up his sheaf of papers and showed you his at-home exercises.  “And I’ll probably be off these crutches in a week after that, once the final stitches come out.”

“That’s great!” you exclaimed.  You pulled out into traffic and drove home, enjoying Nick’s sunny demeanor.  The windows were down and a nice breeze was ruffling his hair, now longer than he usually wore it when he was on duty.  “You’ll be back to chasing down perverts in no time.”

“Yeah,” he said, but he didn’t say more. 

----

It was two days later that he pulled you aside to talk to you.  He was sitting on the couch and called you over to sit beside him.  He took your hand in his own and looked at you with those big, brown eyes that you could get lost in.

“I wanted to talk to you,” he said with a slight smile.  “I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me.  You’re the glue that’s held me together the past year…”

You interrupted him.  “I’d do it again, Nick.  You know I love you.”  You noted the slight flinch on his face when you said it and frowned. 

“I know,” he said, and he seemed like he was choosing his words carefully.  “And you know that I care about you too.”

There it was.  Your stomach dropped and you felt a hectic flush break out across your face and neck.  The giddy anticipation of being proposed to – you hadn’t wanted to believe it, but the evidence was all there, he was shopping for rings, and you were a detective, for heaven’s sake, it all made sense – disappeared. 

If he couldn’t respond that he loved you too now, he never would.  Despite the evidence, you had misread the conclusion.

“I’m not returning to the NYPD,” he said, and he squeezed your hand lightly.  “I’m…I’m going to move to California.  To be near Zara and Gil.”  You pulled your hand away from his, and he added quietly, “I wanted you to know first, before I tell Liv and the rest of the squad.”

A small part of you, a stubbornly optimistic, stupid part of you thought that the next sentence out of his mouth would be a plea for you to join him on the west coast.  But that part of you was, well, stupid.

“I can never thank you enough…” he repeated, but you refused to look at him, and he trailed off uncomfortably.  There was a long, heavy silence.

“I was never going to be enough for you, was I?” you finally asked.  You weren’t angry – that would come later, and it would last a long time, but you didn’t know that yet.  You just felt drained.  Defeated.  “All the love and support, all the times I was there for you…it still wasn’t enough.”

Nick started to shake his head, and you could see him trying to think of something soothing that was still the truth, but you continued.

“I guess at least Maria was smart enough to move on.  Amanda was smart enough to move on.  I’m just the idiot who sat around and waited, thought that if I held on long enough and was there for you, you’d see the real me.”

Nick placed his hand on your knee, patting it gently.  “I do see the real you,” he said softly.  “You are amazing.”

“But not amazing enough for you.”

Nick sighed.  “This isn’t what I wanted.  I never wanted to be divorced, a father to two kids with two different women, starting a new career mid-life.”  He sighed again, heavier.  “And I never wanted to lead you on, but you’re so…so you.  So accommodating.  So easy-going.”

You scoffed bitterly.  “So stupid.  So blind.”  You pushed his hand off of your knee and stood up.  “So willing to believe that you were engagement ring shopping.”

Nick sat up, startled.  “When did you see that?”

You shrugged.  “You were in the shower, and I got online to order dinner.  It was an open tab.”  You glanced at him and noted the irritation on his face.  “I wasn’t snooping, Nick.  You left it out there for anyone to see.”

“I’m sorry you saw that,’ he replied as realization dawned across his face.  “You must have been thinking…”  He trailed off, clearly uncomfortable, then dropped his head in shame.  “When Maria and I divorced, she sold her engagement ring.”

“So?”

“So.”  He didn’t want to finish, but you held him with the force of your gaze.  Let him be uncomfortable, uneasy for once.  “So, I wanted to find a similar ring…for when I propose to her again.”  He said the last part so softly that you could hardly make it out, but the message landed like a clanging church bell all the same. 

You nodded curtly and walked over to the door, grabbing your keys and phone. 

“We’ve been talking for a while,” he said after your retreating form.  “It’d be best for Zara if we…”

You didn’t catch the rest of it.  You were already out the door, down the hallway, and outside.  If you could, you would have walked forever, as far from California as possible, up the east coast, through New England and up into Canada until the coastline gave out and you could walk into the surf and let the Atlantic pull you into its chilly embrace.

Instead, you walked to Central park.  And when you returned to your apartment late that night, Nick was already gone.  He was probably at his mother’s house, but it didn’t really matter.

He had never really been there to begin with.

[irishavengersassemble]

Game of Survival: Part 2

After tragedy strikes Rafael Barba’s little sister moves back to New York City for a fresh start. Will she be able to move on with the help of her loving big brother and perhaps find happiness with a certain lieutenant  in SVU.

Hello Lovelies. Here’s the second part to my new series hope you enjoy.

Series takes place at the beginning of season 18 of Law and Order: SVU and has references to One Chicago. Reader is canonicallly bisexual and in her mid-thirties.

Pairings: Olivia Benson x Barba Reader   Sonny Carisi x Rafael Barba

Header belongs to me.

TW: Mentions of death and child abuse. If this could at all be triggering don’t read. 

“I love you.” Leslie purred her tender blue eyes full of warmth and love as you lay in bed curled up together listening to the intense thunderstorm that was going on outside.

It had been a long day and the two of you were relishing in the joys of being home in your shared apartment.

“I sure hope you love me. I mean you did propose.” You exclaimed feigning shock as Leslie took your hand pressing a kiss to the lovely ring that she’d put there last year in early autumn.

The proposal had come out of nowhere.

It had been unexpected something you’d not anticipated even though you and Leslie had been in a loving committed relationship for the past three and a half years.

Leslie had planned a weekend trip for the two of you it had been a lake house that was several hours away from the city.

It was quiet secluded the perfect place for a couples getaway.

After a hike in the early hours of the morning which you’d spent most of the time grumbling about going out before having had your morning coffee ever the Barba in you.

When Leslie had stopped you’d figured she was stopping to tie her shoe or had seen a random stray dog off the trail instead of either of those things when you’d turned to look at her she’d disappeared.

After hearing her clear her throat you’d glanced down to find her on one knee with the most beautiful ring you’d ever seen.

She’d asked you to marry her right then and there and you’d startled the both of you tackling her in your excitement sending you to the ground in nothing but a heap of tangled limbs.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I can’t wait to be your wife.” Leslie had told you her eyes shining with that warm spark that seemed to fill them whenever she’d look at you.

“And I can’t wait to be yours.” You hummed tucking a strand of her bright blonde hair behind her ear as you leant forward pressing a soft kiss to her lips as she let her forehead rest against yours.

You woke with a start the memory turned dream feeling much too real.

Your hands automatically reached across your bed feeling for Leslie finding her spot missing just as it had been for the past two years.

It didn’t matter a different city a different bed no matter where you went you still reach for her; your heart ached you missed her and everything that she’d been.

She’d been your heart, your home, your everything and in a matter of seconds she’d been taken from you gone in an instant.

You felt sick your stomach clench as flashes of your blood-strained hands filled your mind. You’d done everything you could and it hadn’t been enough.

Sitting up in bed you glanced around your empty bedroom taking in the various boxes you’d yet to unpack.

 Three weeks had passed since you’d arrived in New York and after staying with Rafael for about a week you’d found the place you were in now.

It wasn’t the most lavish apartment, but it was comfy, in your price range, in a decent area and close to Rafael’s apartment and the precinct you’d started working at.

You’d been placed in Narcotics and although it hadn’t been something you’d expected to like after working for the past few years on the streets of Chicago you’d been enjoying it so far at least.

Being a cop is something you’d never pictured yourself doing, but after losing Leslie in such a horrific accident it had seemed like the obvious thing to do and so far you’d not regret your choice whatsoever.

You liked making a difference and keeping those around you and your city safe. It was a learning curb just like all things.

A sigh fell from your lips as you glanced at the clock on your nightstand the number’s in bright red filling the darkness of the room.

It was only five in the morning, on your day off no less, but going for a run sounded like the best course of action you knew if you stayed home you’d end up lost in your head too much.

That was never a good thing you’d end up stuck in the past and replaying what could have been scenarios that always made your head feel heavy and like someone was holding you underwater.

Throwing on a pair of leggings you put on a sports bra and a t-shirt before throwing your long h/c hair into a quick ponytail and brushing your teeth.

You grabbed the proper outer gear given it was January and New York was still as freezing as it had been when you’d left it.

About an hour later you found yourself running through an open trail that was close by Central Park the air was cool and filled your lungs.

This trail had been something you’d enjoyed whenever you’d come back to New York to visit your mami, Abuelita, and Rafael it was also a place you’d taken Leslie so she could run with you until she’d bribed you to head back to your hotel after grabbing some bagels from a bakery close by.

It was comforting being back here New York called out to you in a way Chicago never had it was in your blood.

Even after nearly a decade away the New Yorker in you felt calm, relaxed, and safe you felt like a prodigal daughter finally returned to her rightful homeland.

It was nice having your family so close instead of a phone call or flight home you could go visit them basically anytime you wanted.

It was now close to noon.

You’d finished your run before heading back home. You’d showered and gotten dressed in a pair of jeans and a black-sleeved shirt that fit you well.

After making breakfast which consist of an espresso, some eggs, and sourdough toast you’d thrown your hair up and focused on cleaning up your apartment.

There were quite a few boxes to still go through you’d just finished hanging up a few photos in your living room when a soft knock sounded on your door.

Raising a curious eyebrow you made your way over to your door staring out the peephole you found Rafael standing outside your door he had two coffee’s in hand and a pastry bag under his arm.

“Who is it?” You called knowing that would most likely get a rise out of your big brother over anything.

“Y/N I know that you already looked to see who it is. Will you please let me in its freezing out here.” The light brown-haired man huffed rolling his eyes as you unlocked the chain on your door opening it so the man could make his way through which he did.

“Hola Hermana. I brought some of those cream cheese Danish’s that you like from that bakery downtown.” Rafael purred pressing a kiss to your cheek as he removed his shoes setting the coffees and pastry bag on your coffee table before removing his coat and scarf placing them on the coat rack beside your door.

He sighed rubbing his hands together before blowing into them trying to warm them up even with the coat and scarf his nose and ears were red clearly from the cool winter air.

“It looks good in here. You’ve clearly been busy.” Rafael hummed his green gaze taking in the neat and tidy apartment which had looked like a storage factory had blown up in your living room the last time he’d been over.

He took a seat on your couch settling into the long leather black couch that he and Sonny had been kind enough to help you rearrange when you’d first moved in.

“Yes, I have its called not wanting to live in a storage area as opposed to a home.” You scoffed taking a seat beside the Cuban man you tucked your legs underneath you taking the coffee cup that had your name scrawled on it.

“Thank you for the coffee and food. It's appreciated.” The words tumbled out of your mouth as you snatched the bag before Rafael had time to grab it. You pulled out one of the Danish’s taking a big bite before humming in delight.

“Holy shit! I swear these have gotten better since I last had one.” You all but groaned savoring the delicious bite before you took another.

Your big brother scoffed his eyes saying it all as he quipped.

“Do you need a minute alone with that thing? Geez, that should be a heinous crime in itself.” He teased grabbing his own pastry taking a bite that put yours to shame.

“Wow! Okay Mr. Garbage Disposal.” You huffed jabbing him in the elbow which emit a yelp from his lips.

“Hey! That’s rude on all accounts. Just keep it up and I just might sue you for assault and hate speech.” He sassed as he took a sip of his coffee letting out a content sigh as he enjoy his beverage.

“Okay… go for it. Good luck getting anything out of me with my salary.” You retort knowing you had him there given your big brother, yes, he was an exceptional lawyer, but he also made a really decent salary especially compared to you.

You and Rafael sat there for a few minutes in silence as you finished your danishes and enjoyed your coffee. Finally unable to handle the deafening silence you look at the Cuban man trying to read his expression.

You’d always been good at reading him it was something you’d always been able to do well pick up on little key things, people’s moods how they ticked.

What had started out as a coping mechanism as a way to handle your addict mother and abusive stepfather as a child had become something you now used every day on the job.

Reading people had once been about your own survival and now it was something you used to help keep others safe.

Letting out a small sigh you brought your coffee to your lips before your e/c eyes met Rafael’s intense green.

“Alright, Rafa spill. Why are you here? I know you’ve been insanely busy with your schedule and everything and it's not like you to just visit me out of the blue. Especially this time of day.”

Part of you worried for your pain in the ass big brother had he and Sonny broken up, had something happened at work, was he being threatened, or was he just being his typical overprotective self just as he’d been even before you’d been adopted by Lucia all those years ago.

From the time you were small Rafael had always made sure you were okay; he’d understood what it had been like living in an abusive household and being bullied as a result.

Luckily for Rafael and Lucia, Rafa’s father had been out of his life several years before you’d entered their family.

Still, the scars were still there for both of you metaphorically and in your case literally.

Your entire back was covered tiny circular scars cigarette burns to be specific all compliments of your asshole stepfather.

Rafael set down his coffee his tender yet worried eyes meeting your curious ones.

“I just… I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I know the past two years have been hard on you and I just wanted.

I want to make sure everything is alright. Or as alright as it can be. Losing people you care for and love is difficult.”

“Raf, what’s going on?” “Is this about the detective you lost recently? I know how hard that was for so many of you, especially Sonny.” You acknowledged having heard recently that one of the detectives that Rafael worked with had been killed in the line of duty.

Unfortunately, it happened all too often much more than it should have. That was life though people are born and they die and when it's someone’s time there’s nothing anyone can do.

You of all people understood that you’d done everything and then some to save Leslie’s life and in the end, it hadn’t been enough you’d still lost her.

“Yes, and no Dodd’s death was so sudden and even though I didn’t really know him well. It was rough for Sonny and the rest of the detectives.

It's tragic when someone dies especially someone so young who had so much to offer the world.” Rafael mused before continuing.

“It’s terrifying knowing that my baby sister the one who’s brought so much joy into our lives. Goes out every single day and puts her life on the line.

I just want you to be careful Y/N. Please promise me you’ll be careful.” Rafael acknowledged his voice softer as he reached over grabbing your hand giving it a brotherly squeeze.

“Rafael… I know better than most losing one of your own can have a detrimental effect on a person. Losing Leslie was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. You have to know that I’m going to be careful. I am.

I always have been but these things aren’t always in your control. I know you’re scared of losing me, Rafa. I’d be concerned if you weren’t.” You purred letting out a small sigh as your big brother just rolled his eyes at your comment.

It had been so hard for Rafael when your Abuelita had died she and Leslie had died about a year apart and you knew to this day the guilt was eating your big brother alive.

You understood that he still struggled with it and you knew that he couldn’t lose anyone else close to him.

The squad at SVU losing one of their own had probably brought up a lot of unopened wounds for your big brother not to mention fears as well.

Not only were you a cop, but so was Sonny.

The happy-go-lucky chatty Italian man loved your brother so much and you knew that he loved him in return.

You really didn’t know what Rafa would do if he lost you or Sonny it would crush him.

Your coffee was forgotten at the moment you held out your hand holding up your pinky as Rafael just watched you letting out a huff knowing where this was going.

Ever since you were small you and Rafael had this thing where if you had a really important promise to make you’d pinky swear on it.

It's something he’d done ever since you’d been that scared broken lost little girl who’d come into his and Lucia’s lives and hearts.

As a means of helping you feel better, he’d started with pinky promises making sure to tell you that they were magic and once someone pinky swore with someone it was like magic forever binding and something that couldn’t be broken no matter what.

“Really Y/N don’t you think we’re a little old?"

"Rafael come on don’t be such a baby.” The words tumbled from your lips as your brother groaned knowing there was no way out of this.

It was his fault too he’s the one who’d started doing it.

“Fine, what are we pinky swearing on?” He questions waiting for you to continue.

“Barba to Barba… I promise I’ll do everything I can to make sure I’m careful on the job and I expect you to do the same.” You started when the light brown-haired man opened his mouth.

“I’m always careful.” He scoffed rolling his eyes at you once more.

“Okay, Mr. nearly got strangled to death in court.” You confirmed before Rafael grabbed your pinky linking it with his.

“That was one time and I put that son of a bitch away so it was worth it.” Your big brother got out sassily ever the sassafras master if you’d ever seen one.  

“I’m careful, but I promise to not put myself in impending danger unless I think it’s necessary to help or protect a victim.” He added running a hand through his light brown hair.

“That’s fair. Given I’d do the same although usually, I have a bulletproof vest. So please be careful.” You hummed as you pinky swore before unhooking your fingers with his.

“Alright hurry up and finish your coffee so you can help me put together that Ikea bookshelf I just got.Those instructions are a bitch.” You retort watching as Rafael grumbled under his breath he hated putting furniture together and you knew it.

“Oh quit your whining I’ll take you and Sonny out for dinner this weekend as a thank you. If none of us have a major case that is.” You muse knowing that either of you getting a case that ran over the weekend was highly likely.

“You’re lucky I love you.” Rafael sighed taking a long drag of his coffee.

“What’s not to love?” You smirked knowing it was going to be a long afternoon with your loving yet grumpy big brother.

[australiancarisi]

Olivia Benson x Sonny Carisi ~ Halfway House

A little benisi drabble. All fluff. Based on 17x19. @homerjacksons enjoy Warnings: I haven't written anything for like a year. I also just wrote this, haven't checked it lol Words: 687

Liv was going through the mountain of paperwork on her desk when Amanda came storming into her office.

“I told you we should of pulled him out” Amanda said as Sonny followed her in. Sonny was currently working undercover at a halfway house for sex offenders after there had been a strong of rapes in the area.

“What happened?” Liv asked standing up

“Nothin’” Sonny waved her off

“It’s not nothing Carisi! Nomaks attacked him!” Amanda exclaimed. Liv’s eyes widen and looked to Sonny. When he didn’t say anything, Amanda continued “Him and some of his friends recognised Sonny and attacked him with baseball bats as he was walking back to the halfway house”

“Carisi you are holding your back are you sure you don’t need to go to the ER?” Liv asked concern written all over her face.

“No, I’m fine okay? It’s just a bruise it’s not broken” Sonny said sitting down at the chairs in front of Liv’s desk while Amanda sat on the couch in the corner. “Think they were just trying to scare me”

The three continued to talk about Sonny’s undercover work but Liv was only half listening, her mind going back to Sonny being attacked. The pair had been dating in secret for the past 6 months, no one knew besides Barba, Tucker at IAB and McCoy – it was a need-to-know basis. When Sonny had offered up to go under cover Liv was not a fan. Sure, it wasn’t an overly dangerous assignment but seeing the man she loves slumming it in a halfway house with known sex offenders was not her idea of a good time. Liv’s attention was brought back when Fin came in and updated them on an eyewitness.

“He told me he was with his wife when Sofie got raped” Sonny said

“He told me the same thing; we’ve left her messages” Amanda added

“Okay so go see her” Liv directed to Amanda and Fin who quickly left her office, shutting the door on their way out “And Carisi you’re ‘friends” with Caskey now? Get friendlier”

Sonny nodded and headed towards the door. Just as Liv thought he was about to open the door to leave, he closed the blinds on the windows, giving them more privacy. Liv sighed.

“Stop worrying, I’m fine” Sonny smiled at her.

“Do not tell me not to worry. You’ve just been beaten up by a victims family because they think you are a sex offender. You shouldn’t even be in that house” Liv moved around the desk to stand with Sonny. “How bad is it actually?”

“It’s tender okay” Sonny rolled his eyes as Liv lifted the back of his hoodie up to get a look. She pressed her hand to his lower back, making him hiss quietly.

“I don’t like this Dominick” She whispered

“I know but who else was gonna do it?” Sonny moved Liv’s hand out from under his hoodie and spun around to face her. He won’t deny that he loves how concerned Liv is about him. Every time he’s come into the precinct the last couple of weeks he cane tell she worrying more and more. “If it gets too much for me, I’ll let you know okay?”

“What if it’s too much for me?” Liv whispered, looking down at their hands which had now become intertwined.

“Hey now” Sonny lifted Liv’s chin to look up at him “it was a couple of baseball bats, I’m completely fine. Trust me”

“You know I do, I’m just worried”

“I know” Sonny lent down and placed a soft kiss on her forehead “I can’t wait to be back in a comfy bed”

“Noah misses you”

“Just Noah?” Sonny smirked

“Of course not… as soon as I can get you out of there I will” Liv leaned up and found Sonny’s lips for a quick kiss. Even though the blinds were closed she was worried, anyone could walk through the door. “Be safe Dominick”

“Always am” Sonny kissed Liv again. “I love you”

“I love you too” she said as Sonny headed back out to the halfway house.

let me know your thoughts!

[bullet-prooflove]

Law & Order: SVU Pairings Masterlist

Peter Stone x Mike Dodds:

Head Space - Mike takes Peter out to a cabin upstate to get a little head space after the death of his father.

Commitment -  Peter takes to the batting cages to work out his frustrations.

Home - Peter comes home to find Mike has returned from his undercover assignment.

Punch Out - Mike needs to relieve a little stress.

NSFW Alphabet with Reader:

Aftercare

Lick

Zealous

POLY!AU - Mike Duarte, Joe Velasco, Terry Bruno X Reader

Day to Day - How it works in the day to day

Various HCs - A variation of HCs for the Poly

Peter Stone x Sonny Carisi:

Promise Me -  Peter comes to home to find Sonny packing.

Intoxicating - The first kiss was a mistake.

Peter Stone x Rafael Barba:

Stepping Out - After keeping their relationship a secret for so long Peter and Rafael decide it’s time to step out into the light.

Thinking of You - NSFW - Peter misses Rafael.

Olivia Benson x Amanda Rollins:

Lullaby - Amanda sings Olivia a lullaby.

All Night (NSFW) - Amanda & Olivia’s wedding night.

Mike Dodds x Sonny Carisi:

Show Me (NSFW) - Mike shows Sonny exactly how much he means to him.

Up For The Challenge - Mike tries to help Sonny get out of his head after the Father Eugene case.

Relationship Questions

Rafael Barba x Sonny Carisi:

Unwrapped - Sonny and Rafa decide to spend Christmas night together.

Relationship Questions

Rafael Barba x Sonny Carisi x Mike Dodds:

Three In The Bed - The dynamics.

Rafael Barba x Trevor Langan

Relationship Questions

First Kiss - Bangan’s first kiss.

Reckless - One reckless moment leads to more.

Coming Clean - People begin to find out about their relationship. 

Divorce Papers - Trevor’s wife isn’t happy when she is served divorce papers.

More - NSFW - Trevor and Raf cross the line.

Hurt -  After the death of Trevor's father, an unlikely face offers comfort.

Compulsive - Raf and Trevor can’t keep their hands off each other.

Cupid’s Arrow - Rita sets Raf up on a dating app.

Weller Vs Langan - Raf compares his ex’s behaviour with Trevor’s.

Artist!AU - Can be read as stand alone or part of a series.

Translucent - Raf struggles to recover in the aftermath of his lover’s death.

Inspired - Trevor inspires Raf to paint.

Fics:

Chrysalis - Trevor didn’t expect to fall in love.

Asks:

A bicycle built for two - Bane

“I will never compare to him!”  - Bangan

What happens when Raf and Trevor play monopoly? - Bangan

Anniversary - Bangan

Epiphany - Bangan

Philosophy - Bangan

“The God’s May roll a die” - Bangan

Washing the dishes? - Bangan

Grow old with you - Bangan

Forget me not  - Bangan

Endless - Bangan

Forever - Bangan

Amazing Grace - Bangan

My last choice - Bangan

Jewel tones - Bangan

Without love - Bangan

Arranged Marriage - Bangan

Simplicity -  Barhoun

Just one night - Barisi

“In The End”  - Barisi

The Light - Barisi

Pregnancy Trope and Erotic Dreams - Barisi

A summer of Joy - Barisi

Unknown Love HC - Barisi

“Will you stay?” - Dorisi

“Let Go” - Dorisi

Finding Out You’re Parents Were Serial Killers - Mike Dodds, Nick Amaro, William Dodds

Soulmate AU - Peter Stone x Anita Hall

Will They, Wont’ They? - Peter Stone x Anita Hall

Blissful Ignorance - Peter Stone x Anita Hall

Pitter Patter -  Peter Stone x Anita Hall

Dealing With A Seizure - Rafael Barba, Sonny Carisi

Strung Out Friend - Rafael Barba, Sonny Carisi

Opal - Starisi

What happens when Sonny and Peter play Monopoly? - Starisi

A Cinderella Story - Stodds

The moon cracks open - Stodds

The might you shone - Stodds

What happens when the SVU squad plays clue? - Squad

[userarchive]

Unexpected Circumstances Ch 11

Warnings: Language, talk of the job/sex trafficking. A/N: Y’all this took a fcking WEEK to work through cause there was so much detailing to pay attention to. Sue me if things aren’t accurate/canon/whatever. I think it turned out okay enough?!

**

To say you were practically exhausted would nearly be an understatement at this point. Living undercover was never easy, but with it being the Christmas season simply made things worse, parties were larger, filled with more people you needed to document, the drugs and alcohol moved freely through them, you dealt with more suppliers than any other time of year. You’d finally made your way past Christmas day, relishing in a couple of days of relaxation. Alejandro ordered a feast of delicacies, mimosa’s with breakfast and far too expensive wine with dinner, gifting you with the diamond bracelet you so ‘obviously deserved’ over lunch. While you had to admit, living the high life was something you did sometimes miss from your childhood, you were more than happy knowing there were only six days until SVU would make the bust, only six bullshit parties until you’d finally be free from this specific hell.

It was the evening of the 26th, you’d wrapped up Christmas, the penthouse returning to its normal decoration, prepping for the New Years Eve party. You’d set up a number of rooms for clients and girls, the top wing where your and Alejandro’s rooms were clearly off limits, but you had security placed at the top of that staircase. You traipsed down the stairs, heels in your hand, hair curled loosely around your shoulders, blue dress hugging every inch of your body like no tomorrow. The log book tucked under your arm, a smirk on your lips as you met Alejandro’s gaze.

“You ready?” You asked at the base of the stairs, slipping your feet into the heels, “Should be an easy night.”

“I’m just waiting for the 31st Chiquita.” He replied. You gave him a soft smile, happily indulging into the food he’d ordered for the two of you, gratefully accepting the glass of champagne he poured for you.

Slowly over the next couple of hours the girls started to arrive, escorted by their pimps/madams, you were quick to baby them, reminding them that when they were in your house, they didn’t need to do anything they didn’t want to. Anything unacceptable happens, they were to call you, and you’d fix the situation. You were quick to remind the pimps that it was, your house, your rules, you knew most of the girls that came through your parties were of age and willingly doing this, but there was always a limit of no. If they didn’t want it, you didn’t allow it and you were definitely going to kick a customer out and red list him from as many parties as possible.

A few hours later and the party was in full swing, you had a good handful of perps throughout the suite, everything was going smoothly, the money, booze and drugs were flowing smoothly. Alejandro kept a protective eye while you finished up the books, handing you a fresh glass of champagne when you flipped the book shut, letting out a hefty sigh. You passed it off to one of the nearby security guards, insisting he put it upstairs where you kept the others. 

“You okay Mija?” He questioned as you moved from the island, facing the extravagant living room.

“Yeah.” You ran a hand through your hair as you took a hefty gulp of the alcohol “I just have a bad feeling about tonight…” You glanced up at him,  “I think you should get out of here.”

“And what? Leave you to deal with the blow out on your own?” You tossed him a wicked grin,

“We both know all I have to do is shed a few tears and flip on a few of these idiots and I’ll be walking away with a misdemeanour. That last bust…wasn’t vice, sex crimes is onto us now. The target on our back is getting bigger.” Your words were quietly muttered into the rim of your champagne flute, eyes watching the room. 

“Well it sounds like you know the drill, do exactly that, and we run. How do you feel about the French Polynesia? Sure beats the New York winter.” You rolled your eyes at his comment. Sure, a tropical getaway of a vacation sounded fucking wonderful right about now, but the last thing you wanted was another year under. You took a swig of champagne, leaving the glass on the counter, muttering that you were going to do a quick round of the house, not that you would find any trouble upstairs. Oh no, the trouble was walking in the door while you made your way back down the staircase.

“You really think you can throw a party on my turf without me darlin’?” Fucking Declan.

“Last I checked you weren’t invited O’Rourke.” You strode towards him, hands settling on your hips, “Not to mention this isn’t your turf.”

“C’mon sweetheart, you forget what I have to offer?” You scoffed at that, noticing Alejandro cautiously moving towards the two of you.

“Oh, what!? Strung out sixteen year olds?!” A hand wildly gestured to the four girls behind him, obviously under age and obviously not sober. “You’re just here to pretend you’re fancy when you are in fact, a piece of trash. Get the fuck out of here.”  Your personal rage towards the man, knowing that he still had his bosses convinced that he was undercover when he was in fact a criminal, blinded you from noticing him pulling the gun from inside his coat. You yelped as he crashed the butt of it into the side of your head, yelling something about how you were no better than a stupid whore.

“HEY!” The shout came from Alejandro, he moved to push Declan against a wall but you were a hot second faster, a heel to the balls, you had the gun out of his hand and unloaded in a matter of seconds, tossing the magazine to the floor in the direction of the nearest security. Nonetheless he shoved his shoulders hard enough to send the other man stumbling in the direction of the elevator. You heard the all too familiar ‘gun!’ shout with just enough time to look up at Alejandro.

“Run!” Grasping your hand he tugged you towards the back entrance, you were halfway through the door when ESU caught you, coming from that entrance. The cops behind them were more than quick to wrench you and Alejandro apart, no doubt knowing exactly who you were, and catching the big fish was more important than trying to gather up minnows.

‘You have got to be fucking kidding me…’

***

You knew hours had passed, you’d been taken down to the 2-4 and very unceremoniously tossed into an interrogation room, at least they’d been generous enough to un-cuff you and give you an ice pack for the pistol whipping you’d taken. Whenever a bust happened with you and Alejandro they were always going to send in the big guns, and they usually let you wait it out while they started with him. You’d collapsed yourself against the cold metal table, legs dangling off the edge, you couldn’t believe this, five days, five fucking days until SVU was supposed to make the bust. You were livid with whatever dumb ass Captain approved the bust without communicating to other units, and on the 26th of all days?! It was your smallest party, aside from the added bonus of Declan in cuffs, there was no upside to this whatsoever.

With the sound of the door opening, you lolled your head to the side, annoyed expression on your face matching the one on man who walked in, clearly Alejandro wasn’t talking.

“Get up.” Shooting a glare at the way he kicked the leg of the table, you rolled your eyes. Stereotypical, send in the big burly guy to play bad cop with the Queen. You knew who he was, and if Elliot Stabler was questioning you, Organized Crime seemed to also be on your tail.

“Make me.” It slipped out before you stop yourself. It was late, way too late for you to be strapped into a too tight dress and stilettos, you knew you were either spending the night in a holding cell or heading back to your precinct to work the case, your attitude wasn’t exactly ideal. Stabler sighed heavily, grabbing the leg of the table by your head and giving it a hefty tug, pulling it out from under you causing you to nearly topple over as your heels met the floor. He moved back in front of you, a tilt of the head, smirk on his lips, sizing you up as he moved in closer.

“Your King’s not talking, figured maybe you’d be more up for it.”

“Am I supposed to be afraid of you?” You cocked a brow, “Cause it certainly isn’t working, this whole, bad cop thing? Hasn’t aged well.”

“Sit down.” 

“And I suppose you want me to not shut up this time.” The only reason you even considered obeying the order was the aching in your feet from being in heels all night, “What does Organized Crime want with us anyways. It’s usually Vice.” He stalled slightly at that, making you smirk, you loved having the upper hand on men like him.

“Someone let it slip on the way in?”

“Oh…no. Sergeant Stabler, you know who I am, why shouldn’t I know who you are?” Yeah…this was definitely Organized Crime’s first time dealing with the royalty of Manhattan. “Shame you didn’t run your little op past the other departments, would’ve heard New Year’s was the night to go in.”

“What, you got cops working for you? Letting you know the little secrets so you can evade arrest?”

“Am I under arrest Sergeant?” You gave a smirk at the sigh he released in response.

“Technically, we don’t have anything on you…yet.”

“That’s what I thought.” You stood from the table, eager to get the fuck out of the unfamiliar precinct and back to the confines of your own. You barely noticed Stabler moving faster than you could imagine behind you. The door never made it open, you were jerked backwards, his hand closed around your wrist, 

“I said yet.” You felt the cement of the wall hit your body, head ricocheting off it, his forearm pressing into your collarbone. Your hand shot up, fingers hitting his parotid, the reaction causing his elbow to slam into you mouth, you felt your lip split as he stumbled from you. You were done playing, and you were certainly done playing the good girl role.

“You touch me again and I’ll have IAB so fucking far up your ass you won’t be able to shit for a month. Do I make myself clear?”

“Playing the cop angle now? You just assaulted a police officer.” He shot back, still right up in your face, rubbing the spot behind his ear you’d hit.

“Oh wow, I’m so scared! A class C felony, mark yourself down for the same offence. I’m undercover you moron.” You growled at him, if there were this many different departments on your ass there was no way you were going to be able to hide for six months, much less restart the ring afterwards.

“Yeah, right.” He scoffed, “Colour of the day?”

“Gold.” You shot back. Your heart immediately dropping into your stomach when you saw the laugh on his lips. Fuck. Gold was the 31st, you’d been so focussed on the SVU bust you’d forgotten today’s.

“Nice try.” He smirked, “Now you can either sit your ass down in that chair and tell us everything you know about Alejandro Martinez, or you can go to jail for solicitation and that assault collar.”

“I don’t make deals with cops. I make deals with A.D.A’s.” You crossed your arms over your chest, “And you’ll never find the evidence you need in the penthouse even if I do flip on Alejandro.”

“What exactly is it you want then?”

“Take me back to the apartment, I’ll get you what you want, but you take me to A.D.A. Carisi at the 16th. And in the meantime you can call Rita Calhoun ‘cause I’m not saying another word without my lawyer.” He gave out a huff at that, 

“Fine.” You rolled your eyes when he pulled the cuffs from his belt, thankful at the very least that he cuffed your hands in the front, giving you a little bit more movement ability.

**

All you could do on the way to the 1-6 was pray that some amount of the squad was there, preferably Olivia or Fin, you knew Sonny would’ve been called, and honestly felt horrible for dragging Rita out of bed in the middle of the night for literally nothing. No matter what kind of facts you relayed to Stabler he wasn’t about to believe the fact that you were a cop. You’d spewed off your badge number so fast you’d accidentally swapped the last two numbers, the exhaustion and multiple glasses of champagne wearing on you by then. Thankfully you’d been able to retrieve what you needed from the penthouse, before being not so gently shoved into the back of the cop car on the way to your own workplace. 

The desk sergeant was nearly asleep as the three of you made your way into the precinct, not noticing that their apparent perp was someone he saw nearly every day. Elliot’s partner was carrying the books you’d grabbed from the house. It was when you finally made your way into the bullpen that he dropped the heavy books down onto an open desk, gaining the attention of the minimal people in the room.

“Doll..Oh ma god.” Sonny took one look at you before nearly freaking out, “Imma grab some ice.” His lips hit the unbruised side of your head lightning fast before Rita spoke up.

“Un cuff her now!” The outburst brought Olivia out of her office, and exhausted look on her face that mirrored yours.

“Why should I?” Stabler shot back,

“Because she’s one of mine! Jesus El.”

“She had the wrong colour of the day.” You rolled your eyes, thankful at the release of the metal on your wrists, rubbing at the reddened skin of your wrists.

“Montgomery, you okay?” Olivia asked softly, noticing the marks on your face.

“Yeah,” You murmured, “No thanks to your old partner.” You accepted the bag of ice from Sonny, alternating it between your lip and purpling eye, “Murphy showed up at the party, fucking pistol whipped me.” You turned back to Stabler, “Keep him in fucking custody, guy’s dirty, has been for years.” You felt Sonny’s arms wrap around you, the shaky exhale of his breath making you realize just how relived he was to have you in his arms again, how happy he was you were okay. You gave him a gentle squeeze with your free arm before pulling away, turning to Rita. “Sorry to drag you out at this hour, but you know how these guys won’t stop until they hear the word lawyer.”

“You sure you’re okay?” She asked, giving your arm a gentle squeeze as you nodded.

“Yeah, get outta here.” Rita was an old family friend, she was always your go to when you needed a lawyer over the years of undercover work, even if she never actually had to defend, you were always quick to buy her dinner for waking her up. You turned to Benson, “Cap, I’ve got the books, call in Kat and Fin if you wanna start working on the case.” You shot a glare back to Stabler, “And for the love of God, keep Martinez in custody this time, but do not mention anything about me being a cop, understand? On the rare chance he gets off or doesn’t have a reason for arrest, I don’t need him knowing I’m a UC.” He glanced up to Olivia for confirmation, who simply gave him the very obvious nod, 

“She’s been working this ring for nearly 8 years, I’d trust her if I were you.”

“Okay.” He held up his hands in defeat, “I’ll send the case your way.”

“Thank you.” You practically groaned, your eyes back on your Captain, “Please tell me I can at least power nap before the others get here?”

“Yes.” She gave you a soft smile, noticing how you grabbed Sonny’s hand, “Hey! No funny business.”

“Liv I’m too tired to even think about that right now.” You called over your shoulder as you dragged him into the bunk room. Even if it was only going to be twenty minutes, twenty minutes curled in your husbands arms was the only way you wanted to end today. 

[plaidbooks]

The shampoo prompt is cute. Can you do it for Sonny? No need to use the same dialogue.

You were out at the grocery store when you texted Sonny, asking if he needed anything

He replied with a short list of foods, and shampoo

He had the day off today, so he didn't need to shower

Opting to wait until tomorrow before his shift

But he was completely out of shampoo

You told him it was no problem, that you'd pick him up some

Not even 5 minutes later, Sonny was getting a phone call

Liv, asking him to come in

He told her he had to shower first, and would be there in 20

It wasn't until he was standing under the spray that he remembered

Looking around for even a trace of shampoo

His eyes landed on your flowery-smelling shampoo

The one he loved so much

It reminded him of you

With no other alternatives, he snagged the bottle

He left before you made if home

And his whole day, he spent missing you

He kept catching whiffs of your shampoo--on his head

He'd glance up, expecting to see you at the precinct

Only to remember, and then feel empty again

Since it had been his day off, he planned to spend it catching up with you

Now, having the reminder of you constantly

Just made him miss you that much more

Both Rollins and Fin teased him

Telling him he smelt like a bouquet

But Sonny didn't care

It made him smile when he caught the scent

When he finally made his way back home, he quickly found you

And wrapped you up in his arms

He sniffed the top of your head, smiling

The shampoo smelt much better on you than him

[multi-fandom-incorrect-quotes]

Rollins: Im so happy i could kiss you!

Benson, panicking slightly: neat!!

Later

Benson: I cant believe i said neat

Barba: thats not so bad, remember when sonny confessed to me?

Benson: Didnt you thank him?

Barba: i thanked him

[storiesofsvu]

Unexpected Circumstances Masterlist

Sonny Carisi x fem!reader Sonny’s ADA, comes in late one night on a big bust the squad has made to find a familiar face in an interrogation room that he thought he’d seen the last of years prior. Warnings: language, smut, angst, will deal heavily with SVU cases, undercover work, involvement in sex rings/parties.

(an old series that’s on temporary hiatus rn, but probably will be returned to in a bit) (apologies if you’ve already read it on the old blog, I’m just tagging everyone who’s on the sonny taglist)

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Series on indefinate hiatus.

___________ @lesbianologist @bisexualcrowley @detective-giggles @teamsladsandgents @stardust-galaxies @averyhotchner @glimmerglittergirl @beccabarba @itsjustmyfantasyroom @qvid-pro-qvo @thatesqcrush @altsvu @hurricanejjareau @lawandorderimagines @whimsicallymad @fandom-princess-forevermore @caracalwithchips @mysticfalls01 @laurenhope13 @randomthingssss @bisexual-dreamer02 @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindo @mrsrafaelbarba @lila-lola45 @pleasantunknownnacho @ssaic-jareau @barbasbodaciousbeard @alwaysachorusgirl @chasingeverybreakingwave @svushots @nocreditinthestraightworld @australiancarisi @rafivadafreddy @wandas-wife @prettypyschoinpink @thestarrynightslover @newyorker14 @elliecarisi @disn3y7 @sia2raw @Annieray2020 @Awkwardreadera

[navalcriminalimagines]

Pairings: Rafael Barba x Reader, Sonny Carisi x Reader

Warnings: none?

Words: 4,511

Prompt: Rafael spent years keeping his feelings for you hiding.

Missed shot

When Rafael Barba started to work with Manhattan’s SVU, you’d been a detective there for almost two years. You joined the squad shortly before Stabler left. You saw Nick Amaro and Amanda Rollins joining in too. At first, Cragen partnered you with Amanda, and Olivia with Nick, but considering it wasn’t working between Liv and Nick, changes were made, and Nick became your partner.

You two quickly became close, like a brother-sister relationship. He told you about his issues with Maria, you were the first (and only one) to know when him and Amanda became a thing. So, obviously, you told him your secret.

“This is Tomas,” you told Nick, as you were showing him a picture of an 8-year-old boy. “My son,” you added. “Don’t bother counting, I did give birth to him when I was 17.”

“He’s cute. Looks a lot like you,” Nick smiled at you. “Nobody in the squad know?” he asked.

“Cragen does. But he’s our Captain and it’s in my file. But the rest, nope,”

“Why not?”

You told him more about your debut in the police. At first, you did hide the fact that you were a mom. But you quickly realized that your coworkers and others were judging you. People took you as immature, non-serious, and some guy actually pictured you as an easy girl. You hated every second of your debut. So, when you joined the bomb squad, you decided to make your son a secret. It’s much better this way.

Olivia learned about your son when she took Cragen’s place. A part of her was surprised, but another wasn’t. She saw you with kids, you do have that mother instinct. And of course, she promised that nobody would know about Tom.

Working with the SVU squad wasn’t an evidence for Rafael Barba. Nick gave him hard time for no apparent reasons, Amanda wasn’t a fan of him. Fin didn’t care much. But luckily, Olivia welcomed him nicely and then there was you. You were sweet to him, kind. You asked him if you whether call him “Rafael” or “Barba” – “Your choice,” he answered. You ask him how he’s doing every time you see him. You usually bring him a coffee when you stopped by his office.

You’re nice, gorgeous, young, smart, badass… it didn’t take long for Rafael to get interested in you. More than just as coworker. But this couldn’t be happening, so he started to stay away from you as much as possible. At first, it was easy since Rafael only sees you as a detective. He doesn’t know anything about you outside of the office, only that you have Swedish origins from your father. He doesn’t want to know more. He doesn’t need to.

But despite himself, he overheard conversations between you and Nick every now and then. When the name “Tom” came back multiple times, Rafael assumed you had a boyfriend. Good. This should make things easier.

For two years working together, you and Rafael had a normal work relationship. He kept his crush under-wrap, seeing people every now and then, when the thought of you was too much. Sometimes it was one-night stands, sometimes a bit more. But he never kept seeing the same person for more than two months. That’s when people want to make things more permanent. Rafael doesn’t want that.

Keeping you at arm’s length was perfect for him. He couldn’t let you in. He wasn’t open for a serious relationship, and he felt like you could turn his world upside down if he let you in.

He almost did when Nick got shot. You were very worried for your partner, Rafael almost hugged you when you started to cry in front of him. But Liv called at the same point, so he didn’t. And then Nick left SVU, and New York. His departure hurt you a lot, for a moment, Rafael thought you two had some kind of an intimate relationship. But he remembered a conversation you two had.

“Hey Barba, we’re going out for drinks. Wanna join?” you casually asked.

“What’s the occasion?”

“Okay, first, do you need an occasion to go out for drinks? And second, it’s just that Nick needs to get his mind off the breakup,”

“So, it’s definitely over between him and his wife?”

“Yeah, she’s moving to DC with Zara. He’s not doing great,”

“But he can always count on his other partner,” Rafael said, without thinking.

You chuckled, “What does that mean?”

“You two are—close,” Hopefully, it didn’t sound like jealousy. Which it actually was.

“Amanda is the one he slept with, not me. I’d rather sleep with you,” you left right after.

This was months ago, but Rafael still couldn’t believe you said that. He tried not to overthink about it, but he couldn’t. Was this just a joke? Were you just trying to prove a point? Or did you see him as more than just a coworker? He considered trying to explore this, but before he found the courage to do something about it, Sonny Carisi joined the squad and became your partner.

You missed Nick a lot, but you welcomed Sonny with open arms, unlike the others at first. He will forever be thankful about that. It didn’t take long for Rafael to see that you had a bond with Sonny, just like the bond you had with Nick. Maybe more. Liv told him a few times that being partners when you’re a cop is very special. He understands that, but it doesn’t he likes it when it comes to you.

Few months after Sonny join in, Rafael heard the name Tom again. You must have to Sonny about your boyfriend. Since he didn’t hear that name for months, he assumed that you two had broken up. But apparently not. Meaning that there’s nothing romantic with Carisi, but you still have a boyfriend. So, Rafael tried to forget what you told him and kept trying to convince himself that what he’s feeling for you isn’t love.

More months went by. It was obvious for Rafael that Carisi had a thing for you. He didn’t like it, but there’s nothing he can do. But he kept turning down all of your offers when the squad met up for drinks. He didn’t need that. He didn’t want to know the you outside work.

One day, he showed up to the precinct. No one was nowhere to be find. He spotted a gift wrapped on your desk. Curious, he took a closer look. There was a card. He looked around, still no one. So, he tried to take a look at the card.

“That’s very noisy of you, counselor,” he heard for behind. You. He jumped from the surprise, let go of the card.

“A box on a detective’s desk. Had to be sure it wasn’t a bomb,” he said, trying to keep a straight face. You laughed at his excuse.

“Would love to see your reaction if you saw a bomb,” you said, with a smile on your face. Apparently, you aren’t mad, so that’s good.

“I’d rather not,” he shyly smiled at you. “What would your reaction be?”

“Considering that I’ve been there before, I would keep my calm and do my best to defuse it,” you said before walking to the coffee area. Rafael analyzed your words for a moment before joining you.

“Come again?”

“Spent two years with the bomb squad before joining SVU,” you casually said, handing him the cup of coffee you just poured.

In four years, this was the first personal information you gave him. He almost couldn’t believe it.

“I—I didn’t know,”

“Well, yeah. We never talked about anything else than our cases,”

“True,” he took a sip. “And why would that be? In your opinion,”

“Because you don’t like me,”

You had poured another cup for yourself and walked up straight to your desk after those words. You sat, grabbed the gift to put it aside and started to look at something on your computer. Rafael was stunned for a moment but joined you again. He closed your laptop, and leaned against your desk, right next to you. He had never been this physically close to you before.

“Why in the world would you think that?” He asked.

“We’ve been working together for four years, Barba. Not once, did you show some kind of interest in me. You’re best friends with Liv, you tolerate Amanda, you’re courteous with Fin. Hell, you gave hard time to Sonny for the first year but now you agreed for him to shadow you. But me? I feel like you wish I wasn’t here,”

Rafael stayed silent for a moment, analyzing your words. Indeed, he tried to keep his distance with you, but he never thought it made you feel that way. He felt very bad about himself.

“But hey, no problem, okay? We’ve been able to make it work that way for years, there’s no reasons we can’t keep going,”

“You’re very wrong—about everything, Y/N.”

“Then what is it?” You locked your sweet blue eyes into his. For a moment, he was afraid you may see all the love he has for you in his eyes. What reasonable excuse could he tell you? His mind raced. But thankfully, the rest of the squad came back at that moment.

“Barba, Y/N. Are you interrupting?” Rollins smiled.

“Nope,” Rafael stood up right and followed Liv into her office. You watched him leave. No answer. Again.

The gift was actually from Sonny, but it wasn’t for you. It’s for Tomas, who’s now 13 years old. The father left when you told him you were pregnant (he was a bit older) and never saw him again. You raised Tom by yourself, with the full support of your parents, luckily. Your son showed up his interest in makeup and esthetic about a year ago. You completely support him in his passion, brought him whatever he needed/wanted.

Sonny went shopping with his 16 years old niece Mia during the weekend and she wanted to go to the Sephora. He asked her what he could offer to Tomas.

“Uncle Sonny. Are you trying to seduce the mother by being so nice to the son?” Mia asked with a smirk on her face.

“Okay, first, I wouldn’t need to do that. And second, it’s just that—it’s not easy to be different. I just want him to know that he can count on me,”

“Like you wished you could count on someone when you realized you were bisexual?”

Sonny looked at his niece with wide eyes. He still isn’t out to his family. How could she know? “Last year, I figured that this Sam you talked about wasn’t a she but a he. And--I’m bi, too, Uncle Sonny.”

That’s a lot to process in two minutes, while he is standing in the middle of a makeup store.

“There’s nothing wrong with that…right?” Mia added.

“Oh, of course not, sweetheart!” He immediately answered. “When did you know?”

“I was sure when I fell in love with a girl, a few months ago,” she confessed.

Sonny hugged his niece and kissed her hair. “What’s her name? I’d love to meet her,”

“Joy. And that would be nice. I’m so happy I finally told you,”

“I’ll never judge you. And I’ll always be there for you,”

In the squad, you were the only one Sonny came out to. Which makes the two of you even closer.

After the gift “incident”, you and Rafael didn’t talk again for weeks. To be fair, he was trying to avoid you. He almost confessed his feelings for you and that can’t be happening. After this, Rafael decided to call back a woman he used to see. She’s beautiful, smart, nice and wants the same things he does. Exactly what he needs.

He never wanted to talk about his personal life at work, but one day, you showed up in his office. Rafael was on the phone, his back to the door. He didn’t hear you come in, so he kept making plans with Judith. You listened, and felt your chest tightened.

Before he hung up, Rafael heard the door of his office closing. He turned around; nobody was there but he saw you walking out through the blinds. You had heard and walked away.

When Rafael told you, you were wrong about your assumptions, you thought that maybe he was feeling the same way you did. Turns out, you were wrong.

It was Tom’s 14th birthday. You helped him planned an afternoon party. He told you he invited about 10 friends.

But no one showed up. Your son didn’t feel ashamed about his passion - thanks to you and Sonny, mostly - but apparently, his “friends” didn’t like it.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me they were bullying you? On Monday I’ll go see your principal,”

“Exactly for this. If you do this, it’s gonna be worse. Maybe I should stop,”

“Stop what? Doing something you like? Not under my watch, T. Those kids are just the reflections of their close-minded parents,”

“Yeah, but at least people show up to their birthday parties,”

It broke your heart to see your son like this. You needed to fix this. You need to see your son happy. All day, every day. You went to the bathroom and called Sonny.

“Sonny, I need you,” you said when he answered. “Short things first, those stupid kids didn’t show up to T’s party. There’s no one here. Can you come? With Mia? And Joy? I’m gonna call Liv, see if she can come with Noah,”

“I’m with Mike right now so he’ll be with me. Call Fin too, we’ll stop by Amanda’s to pick her and Jesse,”

“Okay, that’s great, thanks Sonny,”

“Of course. Tom will remember his 14th birthday I promise. Why don’t you call Barba too?”

“Why in the world would I do that?”

“It would be rude not to. Don’t you think?”

“I guess. I’ll see. Can you be there in about an hour?”

You call Liv and she agreed, same for Fin. But Sonny was right, you had to call Rafael.

“Barba,” he answered.

“Hey, it’s Y/N. Sorry to bother you on Saturday afternoon. Um—if you aren’t busy, what do you think about stopping by my son’s birthday? It’s kinda unfair, but stupid kids didn’t show up. I call everyone, they’re all coming. But hey, don’t feel obligated. You don’t have to if you don’t—“

“Okay,” he answered before you could finish your monologue.

“Okay?” You repeated.

“Yeah. When should I be there? And how old is he?”

“I said an hour to everyone. And if you’re asking his age to buy him a gift, don’t bother. Right now, all he needs is people to be there to celebrate,”

“Y/N, don’t make me argue please. How old is your son?”

“14.”

“Okay, thanks. See you in an hour then. Text me the address, please,”

“See you, Rafael,”

Rafael tried to stay calm and natural in front of Judith, but there were some many things in his head right now. Since he went to the bedroom to answer your call, he lied to the woman he was with, pretending a work emergency to leave.

You have a kid. A teenage kid, actually. A quick count made him realized you gave birth when you were 17. Many things made sense now. He needs confirmation but it seems clear that, this Tom he heard about, is actually your son, and not your boyfriend like he assumed.

How could he not know about this? You’ve been working together for almost five years now. He really kept his distance with you. But somehow, he still fell hard for you.

“Hey Liv, I got a call from Y/N. I’d like to buy a little something for her son, do you have any idea?”

“Well, do you know anything about makeup?”

“I beg your pardon?”

Liv laughed. “Where are you? I can pick you up and we stop by a store to buy him something,”

“Okay, I trust you on that.”

An hour later, everybody was there. You welcomed them as they arrived. “If he doesn’t like it, that’s on Liv,” Rafael joked as he handed you the gift he had for your son.

“Nope. That’s on that sells woman that was clearly hitting on you,” Liv interjected.

“She wasn’t— okay, she was. But not my type,”

“Yeah, and Judith probably wouldn’t like it,”

“I don’t know about that. And she doesn’t need to know anyway,” he smiled.

Tom’s mood improved when he saw Mia and Joy. You and Sonny introduced them months ago and Tomas is crazy about them.

“What happened to your face?” Mia asked and Tom frowned. “No makeup, seriously T?” She added, before taking him by the hand.

“Wait—“ you stopped them before they reached the bedroom. “Tomas, meet Mike and Rafael, first. They are the only ones you haven’t met yet,”

It made sense that Tom hadn’t met Mike yet, since he joined SVU a couple of months ago. But yeah, it stings to Rafael. Five years. And he didn’t know.

“You look like a cop,” he said Mike, “but you don’t,” he then said to Rafael.

“Cause I’m not. I’m an ADA, Assistant Dis—“

“I know what it is,” he cut him. “Thank you for coming,”

“Can we do his makeup now?” Mia called out and the three of them — adding Jesse who wanted to go too — disappeared in the bedroom for a moment.

“Thanks, guys, for showing up this quick. It’s a mess,” you sadly said. “T told me that he’s being bullied at school because he loves makeup, lets his hair grow. Apparently, they are calling him a sissy,” your jaw clenched. Rafael saw the mama bear in you. “He doesn’t want me to interfere. But maybe I should anyway,”

“You’re here for him. We all are, that’s what he needs,” Sonny said, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to bring you comfort. Rafael tried to avoid the jealousy in his belly.

Opening gifts arrived fast. Everyone brought him something, mostly makeup stuff. Sonny actually got him an appointment in a famous hair salon in Manhattan. Now that his hair is long enough, Tom mentioned wanting to get a real haircut. Mike listened to Sonny’s advices for his gift.

“This is from Nick,” Liv said as she gave Tom a gift. “He wants you to call later,”

“Mom!! That’s two tickets for California!” Tomas exclaimed before reading the note. “And he’s offering me surfing lessons! When are we going? Before—“

“Soon, my love.” You said before he could finish his sentence.

Then came Rafael’s gift. “You can return it if you don’t like,” he said. But Tom’s face lit up when he saw what it was.

“Mom!!!” He showed you the gift, with a huge grin on his face.

“Wow! You finally got it,” you returned his smile and moved a little to stand by Rafael’s side.

“Thank you so much, Rafael!” Tom stood up and hugged the ADA. Some affection Rafael didn’t expect.

“He’s been bugging me for this palette for weeks. I told him to wait because it’s damn expensive,” you whispered to Rafael.

“It’s okay. I’m glad he likes it,” he just answered.

Tomas was thrilled with all of his gifts. It feels good that with those people, he doesn’t have to hide himself, who he is and what he loves. Later, you noticed that Rafael setback from the others. You stood next to him.

“You’re not mad about the gift, are you?” He asked, before you could say anything.

“A little, to be honest,”

“I can pay for that,”

“I know. I see your clothes every day. But that’s not the point,”

“Then what is the point?”

“For the first five years of his life, I couldn’t buy him things. All the toys he had were gifts from my parents— when I made better money, I spoiled him. For years. And now, he’s a very smart teenage boy but he doesn’t necessarily have the value of money. Which I’m trying to teach him. And you showed up with this hella expensive palette, Nick got him plane tickets and surfing lessons. Even the appointment Sonny got him is expensive. That’s not helping,”

“Great,” he smiled, and you shot him a glare, “you’re not actually mad at me, but more at yourself,”

“Don’t do this. You’re not a parent, Rafael,”

“Indeed,” he took a deep breath, “And how come did I do not know you were one?”

“This will just bring us back to our convo from February, don’t you think? And we both know how it ended,”

“We were interrupted,”

“And you’ve been avoiding me ever since,”

So, you noticed that. You always noticed things. He hates that about you. He intensely looked at you, not knowing what to say exactly.

“But don’t worry, Barba, you won’t have to use force for that anymore,” you gently patted his shoulder and joined the others. “My love, do you mind if I steal your thunder for a moment?” You asked your son.

“Nope. Are you going to tell them?”

You looked at Liv for approval and signed Rafael to come closer, which he did. Everybody waited for you to talk. “I—I’m leaving SVU,” you said. There were gasps, widen eyes and Sonny choked on his beer. “Don’t die yet, Sonny. I haven’t finished,” you paused. “It’s no secret that my father was born in Sweden and move here after he fell in love with my mum,”

That, Rafael did know. You talked about your Swedish origins. “After my mum died, my father moved back there. And he’s been bugging us to come with him and considering I’ve always promised this one,” you said, playing with Austin’s hair, “that we would try to live there for a while, I’m actually taking a sabbatical. And next month, we’re flying to Sweden. But we’ll stop by California first, apparently,”

Only Liv knew. So, it came as a shock to everyone else.

The mood changed after that. They were all happy but also sad to see you and Tom leave. Mostly Sonny. It was very rare to witness a silent Sonny Carisi, but this was it. One by one, people started to leave the party. Mia and Joy took your son to the bowling alley. Rafael wanted to be the last so he could have a talk with you, but apparently, Sonny had the same thing in mind.

Rafael was helping you cleaning up the apartment when you noticed Sonny, on your small balcony. “How long has he been there?” You asked Rafael, who just raised his shoulders, clearly annoyed. You joined Sonny, not knowing that Rafael could hear everything you two were talking about.

“You okay there, Sonshine?” Sonny chuckled.

“A bit stunned, I guess.” He said, not looking at you.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I—I was afraid to tell you,”

“Why?”

“Because of what happened a few months ago. Because I’m scared to leave you. Because—I was afraid to change my mind after I told you,”

He finally looked at you. “I’ll never hold you back, Y/N. You know that? You talk so much about Sweden, so does Tom. I’m not completely surprised,”

“Under different circumstances—“ you said, letting the silence says the rest. Sonny turned to his side, so he was facing you.

“I was okay with being your second choice, Y/N, as long as you chose me. But you’re also leaving to be away from him, aren’t you?”

You nodded. “I don’t want to promise you anything, Sonny. But maybe—after that year away—“

He knew what you meant. Sonny put his hand on your cheek, softly caressing your skin with his thumb. Before he could lean in to kiss you, you both heard the balcony window opening. Rafael was standing there. “Who’s your first choice, Y/N?” He just asked. Sonny loudly sighed and turned his back to the lawyer.

“Not important, Rafael.”

“Por favor— answer me.”

“You, idiot,” Sonny muttered, still looking over Manhattan.

“Can—can you come inside for a moment, please?” Rafael asked.

“Don’t worry, I’m leaving,” Sonny said, and turned around to kiss your forehead, “Don’t make anything stupid. Call me,” he kissed your forehead again and walked past Rafael to leave.

“Great timing, Barba,” you sighed.

“I—I don’t understand,” he struggled to say.

“You may be a smart-ass lawyer but when it comes to relationships, you’re very dumb,”

“How long have you—?”

“Been in love with you? About three years. Somehow, the more you pushed me away, the more it made me fall,”

“I pushed you away only because I was scared. Scared of the things I feel for you,”

“You can’t—you can’t confess your love to me as I’m leaving the States, Rafael. That’s not fair,”

“If I don’t do it now, when am I supposed to do it? Over the phone while you’re in Sweden? Or when you come back and choose Carisi?” He paused. “Did you guys sleep together or something?”

“Definitely none of your business,” you said. “And you had five years. Five fucking years, during which all you did was making me feel like a burden for you,”

“I—I never meant to do that. I’m sorry,”

“It’s too late, Rafael. I’m leaving anyway,”

“I’ll wait for you if you ask me to,”

“I’m not. Just like I won’t ask that to Sonny,”

“Then—what? What do we do?”

“Nothing. I’m leaving with my boy in a few weeks, maybe I’ll come back next year, or maybe I won’t. And everybody goes on with their life,”

“Are you saying that I missed my shot with you?”

“Probably,”

This will be hard to swallow. Rafael probably never will, to be honest. But one thing is sure, he couldn’t miss his last chance to kiss you. He closed the gap between your bodies, and slowly put his hands on each side of your face. Since you weren’t pushing him away, he took it as a permission and leaned in to kiss you. He softly put his lips on yours. Right here, right now, on your balcony, nothing else mattered but you and him.

Things escalated quickly. The kiss got more intense, and you used force to make him step back into your apartment. Still kissing each other, Rafael slid his hands on your butt and your legs, gently squeezing to signal you to jump in his arms, which you did. He pulled away briefly, just to ask you which one was your bedroom.

He laid you down on the bed, clothes quickly fly across the room. This probably wouldn’t change a thing, but Rafael made love to you as if his life depends on it.

Indeed, it didn’t change a thing. Two weeks later, you and Tomas flew to California, spent two weeks there with Nick, before flying to Sweden.

Part two, anyone?

[daddydoddsjr]

Masterlist

last updated - 2 January 2023

Important note - I am on and off with writing due to college and work! Your asks may not be answered for a few weeks but I will get to them eventually. <3

Fandoms || Law and Order SVU, Law and Order, Criminal Minds

Included In List || Fics, headcannons, personal fanart, ship playlists, alphabets

Asks/Requests || Open always, but I may be a little slow to get things posted due to college

♡ = smut

Law and Order SVU

Multi-Character

Smacking Headcannons - Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba, Amanda Rollins, Olivia Benson, Odafin Tutuola

Pegging Headcannons - ♡ - Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba, Elliot Stabler, Nolan Price, Joe Velasco

Jealousy — Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba, Rita Calhoun, Peter Stone, Alex Cabot, Casey Novak

Dad Headcannons — Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba

Vanity Headcannons — Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba, Elliot Stabler, Amanda Rollins, Olivia Benson

Minor Inconveniences — Sonny Carisi, Rafael Barba, Olivia Benson, Fin Tutuola, Amanda Rollins

Inexperienced Smut Prompts - ♡ - (list here) (all xReader)

#2 - Sonny Carisi

#3 & #27 - Sonny Carisi

#7 & #33 - Rafael Barba

#11 - Sonny Carisi

#14 & #30 - Barisi

#15 & #46 - Sonny Carisi

#16 - Sonny Carisi

#27 - Sonny Carisi

#31 - Sonny Carisi

#34 - Rafael Barba

Sonny Carisi

NSFW Alphabet - ♡

Dating Headcannons - ♡

Overprotective — x Wife!Reader, Dad!Sonny

Mafia Sonny AU Pt. 1 — x Fem!Reader

Rafael Barba

NSFW Alphabet - ♡

Holiday Season — x GN!Reader

Mistaken — x Male!Reader

Gingerbread Zombies — x GN!Reader

Christmas Eve — x Fem!Reader

Married — x Fem!Reader

Dad!Barba — x Fem!Reader

Dad!Barba — x GN!Reader

Secret Relationship — x Fem!Reader

Sour Things Pt. 1 , Pt. 2 — x GN!Reader

Love Triangle Pt. 1 , Pt. 2 — Elliot Stabler x Olivia Benson x Peter Stone

Ships

Mornings — Barisi

Ship Playlists — Barisi, Barson, Bensler

Olivia Benson

Mornings

Rita Calhoun

Secretly dating

Law and Order

Nolan Price

Threes Company Pt. 1 , Pt.2 — Nolan Price x Fem!Reader x Rafael Barba

Criminal Minds

Aaron Hotchner

Dating Headcannons - ♡

Alluring Pt. 1 , Pt. 2 — x Unsub!Reader

Fanart

Barson

Rollisi

Barson - Unconditional Love

Barson - Goodbyes

Rafael Barba

2022/2023

[itsjustmyfantasyroom]

A feeling.

This was requested by the lovely @ben-c-group-therapy who asked for this:

< Hi! So I’d like to request a story between Nick and reader. Reader is Nick’s pregnant wife who gets kidnapped and held most likely due to a case Nick had been involved with putting the person away for etc. (of course that’s up to you lol.) She and baby would be fine just she would have some bruises or something from where they tied her or whatever. Idk. I don’t have enough courage to write it and I wanted to come to you with it. If you like the idea I’d love to read it! Thanks!>

Hope this hits the spot for you lovely and it’s what you were looking for. A I bet you could absolutely write something like this and it would be amazing. 

Warning: angst, a lot of angst, talks of SVU cases, talks of kidnapping,  happy ending and soft soft Nick. The pinch of Spanish that’s in there, sorry if its wrong I used google.

WC: 1770

Enjoy x

Nick had been day dreaming since he got back to his desk after court that morning, he hadn’t been this happy in a long time and he was finally starting to feel more relaxed now your maturity leave had started, you had only been married for 6 months before the two pink lines showed up and you were both looking forward to adding to your existing family. He knew you had an appointment with your OBGYN that lunch time that he couldn’t go to because he was in court.

But as he sat at his desk, he couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that was filling him. His phone started to buzz in his pocket and when he pulled it out, he frowned his brows at the doctors office number flashing on it, confused at why they were calling, you weren’t due for another 2 weeks,

“Hello, Nick Amaro”

“Mr Amaro, its Jill, Y/N didn't show up for her appointment today, I have tried to call her cell but she didn’t answer. Have you heard from her?”

All colour drained from his face and he froze just as Liv walked out of her office and Sonny jumped up from his chair walking to Nick and taking the phone off him to find out what was going on. Sonny hung up after talking to Jill and turned to Liv, Amanda and Fin filling them in. Nick was looking ahead, fear filling him and everyone tried not to show how worried they were as well, it wasn’t like you not to show for an appointment and even if you didn’t Nick always knew why you weren’t going. Sonny grabbed Nick’s shoulder and shook him to snap him out of his head,

“Come on man, I’ am sure she is having a nap, we all know how tired she is. She only has 2 weeks left. We’ll go and check on her, ok?”

Sonny drove as fast as he could to your apartment building, they rode the lift up to your floor while Amanda and Fin worked with TARU to track your phone as you still weren’t answering and Liv made some calls around to local hospitals and your family to see if you were at any or if they had seen you.

Nick and Sonny rushed out the lift door down the hall to the front door. At first it looked like it was shut but when Nick tried to put his key into the lock, the door opened up. He raised an eye brow at Sonny trying to hold back tears and they both reached for their weapons, drawing them and started to walk into the apartment. Nick had to remember to breath at the state of it and tried to push away the horrible feeling that washed over him as his eyes scanned around your shared home. Sonny’s eyes blew wide at the mess around, the whole place was trashed and there was a smashed coffee cup with coffee pooling around it on the floor.

They both searched the apartment finding you nowhere, Nick yelling your name at the top of his lungs, but he panicked even more when he walked into the bedroom and found photos spread out on the bed of Nick with a recent victim, who had to go into hiding after testifying against her FBI husband,

“Carisi” Nick shouted trying to hide the fear in his voice. Sonny came rushing through the door and his eyes set on the photos, and he too had to try and hide the panic that bolted through him,

“I’ll call Liv” Sonny pulled his phone out of his pocket and made the call to her.

The next few hours where a blur and Nick found it hard to focus worrying if you and the baby were ok. TURU and the FBI agents sergeant finally found the location on where you were and they were getting ready to move in, Nick given strict instructions to wait at the car. Liv, Sonny and FBI were busting into the front of the old factory and Amanda, Fin and SWAT were getting ready to move in from the back.

Nick had seen first hand what this guy was capable of, you had as well, it was the last case you worked on before your maternity leave started and you knew how much Nick was there for the wife and helped her get out with her kids. He kicked himself for not knowing this was coming, and now you had been gone for hours, heavily pregnant and although he was trying to prepare himself for what he could be walking into, he also knew you were strong and he was hoping for nothing but the best for the whole situation.

They all moved in as quickly, but quietly as possible. As they walked into the big room, Liv and Sonny saw you in the middle of the room tied to a chair still in your pj’s, rope around your wrists to the chair arms and duct tape on your mouth. Sonny could see your tears in the shine of the sun from the windows behind you and the FBI agent was screaming in your face and holding something up to you throat,

“Stop, police” Amanda’s voice filled the room.

Shots where fired and you squeezed your eye’s shut, sobbing hearing the shots being rung out of the room and fading away into the background. As soon as Nick heard the shots, he did what he was told not to do and he ran as fast as his legs could carry him into the factory. It didn’t take long for him to find you sitting in the middle of room shaking and crying,

“Y/N, mi amor” his voice echoed through the room.

Your eyes sprung open and you sobbed uncontrollably watching as Nick ran towards you dropping to his knees in front of the chair undoing the rope on your wrists as quickly as he could. As Nick undid one rope he saw the deep marks around your wrist from how tight the rope was around you. He then moved onto the other one and when he pulled off the rope, you were bleeding slightly. Rage filled him even more when he looked up your arm just under your sleeve and saw a bruise from where you had been grabbed too hard,   

“It’s ok Y/N, I’ am here now, you're safe. You’re ok. Baby, you’re ok”  Nick repeated over and over till he reached up pulling the tape off your mouth.

You launched onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck hugging him tight and he did the same wrapping one arm around your middle tight and his other rested on your large belly, tears spilling from his eyes when he felt the baby kick his hand,

“Nick” you sobbed squeezing your arms around him tighter.

Nick kissed all over the side of your face, the hand around you rubbing over your back and his other rubbing over your belly,

“It’s ok, I’ am here my love. I got you”

Without pulling out of your embrace, Nick moved to stand up, pulling you up with him and he scooped you up carrying you out to EMT’s. Nick spent the rest of the day with you at the hospital while you and the baby were checked to make sure you were both fine and getting your wrists patched up, Amanda and Nick’s mum went back to the apartment to pack bags for you both, Amanda dropping the bags and his mum back at her place where you were both going to stay for a while and Sonny organised a cleaner for your apartment for when you were both ready to go back. Liv told Nick to start his leave to keep an eye on you, while she, Fin and Rafael worked on the case against the FBI agent to make sure the book was thrown at him harder this time.

You were finally back at Nick’s mum’s sitting on the spare bed after having a shower and his mum making your favourite dish, Nick just got out of the shower and he was making you a tea. He walked over to sit next to you on the bed, sitting the cup on the bedside table and he sat down right next to you, his arm going around you and his hand resting on your belly.

You moved yourself to lay into his side, his arm coming down to rub up and down your arm, kissing the top of your head and then resting his head on top of yours, a comfortable silence filling the room till Nick broke it,

“We will stay here as long as you want to, I’ll go and pick up the bassinet and the new born stuff tomorrow and we will look for another apartment we can move into as soon as we can, a secure one this time”

“I like that idea”

You sat up off him and your eyes locked with his, you both sat there for a moment looking deep into each others eyes. Your hand rose up to his cheek, a smile pulled to his face and he lent into your hand,

“You were on my mind the whole time” you whispered.

“You were on mine too. Everything was out of my control, I wanted to go out to find you, I felt so helpless. I needed you to be safe” a tear rolled down his cheek and landed on your thumb “I couldn’t lose you” you both giggled when the baby kicked hard and Nick lent down kissing your belly and muttering into it “You too, mi pequeña niña, Te quiero” Nick kissed your belly again.

Nick sat back up and rested his forehead on yours, both of his hands moving to the sides of your head. Nick pulled back slightly, his hands still on your head and yours on his cheek. Nick titled his head to the side looking into your eyes again,

“Nick, kiss me, Please?”

A small smile pulled to his face again and he licked his lips before he closed the gap and his lips met with yours, fitting together. The kiss never deepened, it was soft, slow and loving. Nick peaked your lips, then along your cheek till he hugged you tightly in his arms pulling you into his warm solid body as he sat back on the bed head. You laid into him, your head resting under his chin,

“I love you mi amor, so much”

“I love you too babe”

Tags: @beccabarba @alwaysachorusgirl @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindo

[cycat-carisi]

Fluff #8, please!

Thanks for submitting this! I love writing Sonny fluff! ^^

Fluff Prompts as part of Cycat's Birthday Bash Fic-aganza! 8: "I'll always stay by your side, even after you get old and gray."

Pairing: Sonny x Reader Ratings/Warnings: none, it's fluff!

Old and Gray

"Y'think we'll end up like them?" asks Sonny, softly.

The two of you are seated on the porch swing outside the Pocono cottage that the Carisis are spending the 4th at. The sun has already set and a warm summer breeze rustles through your hair while you and Sonny gently sway on the swing.

Reflecting on his question, you watch Mr. and Mrs. Carisi come together, placing an arm around one another affectionately while they keep an eye on their grandkids. The entire Carisi clan is settling in around picnic tables; their laughter drowned out only by the echo of chirping crickets. The peaceful scene brings a smile to your face.

"I'll always stay by your side," you answer sweetly, "even after you get old and gray."

Sonny lets out a light hearted chuckle, nudging your shoulder with his. "As will I doll," he beams.

"For better or for worse?" you twiddle the wedding band around your finger.

"For better or for worse," he confirms, leaning in to place a soft kiss to your cheek.

You tilt your face towards him. His blue eyes are alive, dancing with the glimmer from the porch lights. Reaching a hand upwards to cradle his cheek, you close your eyes and sense him leaning down to kiss you –

"– C'mon lovebirds!" hollers Mrs Carisi from across the lawn. "The fireworks are abouta start!"

Both you and Sonny hang your heads, romantic moment foiled. But neither of you are mad. Rather, your smiles are inevitably wide.

Sonny gives a small wave to his mother and she turns back to the rest, satisfied that her son and his new wife would soon join them.

He then puts a foot out, easing the swing to a halt and rises to his feet. Your eyes follow his lean form as he stands and extends a hand to you. "We better go, doll. After all, I think half the secret to ma and pa's longevity is that he learned to listen to her a long time ago. And believe me, ya don't wanna be the one who doesn't."

He gives you that smile of his which only comes about when he's truly happy and at ease; the one which crinkles his eyes at the corners. Your heart is brimming with love as you place your hand in his.

Sonny then wraps an arm around your shoulders, leading you out onto the lawn to rejoin the others.

Tag list? @barbasbodaciousbeard @teamsladsandgents @adarafaelbarba @caracalwithchips @averyhotchner

[writefasttalkevenfaster]

Take My Hand (Part One)

Summary: a secret relationship was enough, being with rafael was enough. and it was. until it wasn’t (one of three parts) 

Pairings: Rafael Barba x Reader, Sonny Carisi x Reader (more in next parts) 

Word Count: 3,417

Song:  I'm begging for you to take my hand / Wreck my plans, that's my man (willow by taylor swift) 

Warnings: T, implied sex, some sexual situations (but just kissing and touching, nothing explicit), fwb relationship essentially, rafael’s commitment issues, 

A/N: thank you to @bucky-of-the-opera​ and @qvid-pro-qvo​ for letting me bounce ideas off and not annoy you (hopefully) with my incessant obsession with this mini-series. 

“Barba, it’s time to go home,” the illustrious A.D.A. didn’t bother to look up from your brief he was revising, the margins bloodied with red ink and edits, as you watched, pressed against his doorframe, “you can tear my work to shreds tomorrow.” 

“Since when did you become my keeper?” he murmurs, his brow wrinkled much like the carpet that lined his floor —- and the rest of his office wasn’t much better — dimmed and dark much like the bags under his eyes, takeout containers from Forlini’s stacked in his trash can, printed briefs and case files stacked like a wall around the perimeter of his desk, some even stacked up on the larger conference table, a few scattered on the floor. 

“Oh it was in the job description,” you step forward, picking up the files that had jumped ship, likely to escape your boss, “assistant district attorney needed to assure SVU’s lead ADA is not found buried in an avalanche of cases that decided to take their revenge.” 

He snorts, still flipping pages through the memo, his tie loosened around his neck, sleeves pushed up to reveal his forearms, “I didn’t know you were a comedian before law school,” 

And for once you’re grateful that he doesn’t bother to look up — it means he  doesn’t notice your eyes lingering on his forearms, “There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Barba,” 

And you expect a biting response, a quick retort, but instead you get honest reply, “Well I’d like to, if you’d let me,” you blink a moment, as he glances up for a moment, his look nearly earnest, “you know you do have a habit of keeping people at arm’s length.” 

“This isn’t about me,” and he smiles, looking back down at his work. 

“And the deflection begins,” you huff, scowling at him, though he still paid no mind.  

“Well my office doesn’t look like the aftermath of a legal aid implosion, and I’ve actually been sleeping 6 hours a night, can you say the same?” 

He frowns, lips pursed, “I can take care of myself,” 

“Clearly,” you crossed your arms, straightening the rug with the heel of your shoe, rounding his desk, “this case was impossible today, it will be impossible tomorrow.” 

“Well maybe if I worked a little harder it wouldn’t be so impossible, maybe we’d even get a little justice,” he sighs, lips pressed to the knuckles of his fist. 

You tilt your head, “You know this system is not always getting justice — sometimes it’s just about closure, and that’s all we can do sometimes.” 

“I want to do more— I—” he breaks off, knuckles white against clutching his pen, “I knew the system was full of grays, I know but—” 

“It’s different when it’s SVU, I know, but,” your fingers reach for his tentatively, easing the pen from his fingers, “you can only do what the system lets you — it’s not our job to legislate — it’s our jobs to advocate, to let the people’s voice be heard in court. But you can’t do that if you work yourself right into the ground.” 

“I know, I just—” 

“Barba, you know there’s no point of self-flagellating, no matter how tempting it might be,” 

He lets out a bitter chuckle, “It’s one of my many talents,” before rubbing his hands up and down his face, as if that would erase the exhaustion pressed upon his shoulders. 

“Oh I know,” you say with a sigh, “but you have other talents, don’t you?” and he finally looks up at you — most times you didn’t know what to make of his looks — sometimes it was easy — amusement when the defense counsel tripped up or frustration when the detectives kept pressing him to take the case further when it already sprung a leak — but other times it was a glimmer, a hint at something you could barely grasp onto before it disappeared between your fingers. But now, it lingered, his gaze raked over you until it left your skin blaringly raw under his steady look. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” and now, you barely remember to breathe, the air sucked from the room, instead replaced with a heat — thicker as it settles, but still he sends shivers down your spine, your eyes barely flickering over his lips. 

“I do,” the words falling from your lips, a rushed, thoughtless whisper.

His eyes molten, he leans forward, he mutters your name, barely a whisper — an ask for permission, as his palm dares to rest on your cheek, carefully, as if you would recoil from his touch — but you didn’t. You leaned into his palm, basking in his affection. 

His hand slips down, thumb brushing your lips and then resting on your chin, tilting it downwards, “Are you sure you want to know me this well?” he asks, as you lean forward, your backside pressed against the edge of his desk. 

“I do, if you’ll let me,” his breath warms your lips, “Rafael,” you whisper right before his lips brush yours. 

It’s chaste at first, tentative and gentle, but when your fingers find purchase on the back of his neck, you chase his lips. You taste coffee — bitter and rich, as rich as the passion and urgency of his kisses. Soon he’s standing, and you’re sitting at the edge of the desk, his body between your legs. His hands trail down your body, and his lips follow — pressing fervent kisses to your neck. And your hand grasps at the edge of his to keep yourself steady, the other on his shoulder, digging into his crisp button down. 

“Someone could walk in,” you gasp, hissing as his teeth gently graze your neck, “Raf—” 

He pauses, leaning back, “You’re right,” and you bite your lip, as he steps back, grabbing his jacket, glancing between you and the door, “it’s late, we should—” 

“Right,” your face burns, you round the desk towards the door, fuck, what if he thinks this is a huge mistake? What if he doesn’t— 

He grabs you by the wrist gently, smiling as he brushes past you, holding his office door open for you, “Your place or mine?” 

“You have to make our case, counselors, so what are you going to do about it?” Liv crossed her arms, looking between you and Rafael. 

“We need more evidence Liv, there’s no way around it,” you sigh, “we go in guns ablazing and odds are we don’t get it because a) he destroys it, or b) fruit of the poisonous tree. He’s smart and his lawyers are smart, we need this by the book.” 

“I agree, we need more — have you managed to get into contact with his ex-wife?”  

“Only many unreturned phone calls,” Amanda shakes her head, “I’ll try again, but she retired to Florida—” 

“Do one better, fly down there and talk to her,” Rafael replied, sliding the divorce proceedings across the table, “I think she may be the key to our case, and the warrants we need.” 

Rafael walks them to the elevator, chatting about the case, as you glance at the stacks of motions you needed to get through still. The door clicking shut behind him,  he slides next to you, as you slink down, sighing, “Thanks for backing me up on the case,” 

“Of course,” he replies, “we need more evidence — taking a half baked case against someone like Rita? It’s like begging to be ripped apart in front of an audience.” 

“Well, I know you dabble in masochism,” and he shot you a glare, his thigh pressed against your own, “How long do we have before you think we’ll have a case?” 

“A while — it will take them some time to get down to Florida and get something usable,” he flipped through more packets, before tossing them flippantly onto the coffee table, leaning back, his eyes flickering to the door, and he leans over, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, “which gives us more time to ourselves.” 

“Rafael—” he swallowed your protests with a kiss, and it was enough for your worries to fall away — he was enough to make everything fall away for you, your eyes flickered to the door, “the door—” “I locked it,” the words reverberate against your skin, “I wouldn’t be so careless, counselor,” his use of your title sent a shiver down your spine, “now are you going to let me take you home?”  

It had been a few weeks of this — sneaking kisses in between work, stolen glances across rooms, small smiles that quickly melted away under another's look, and many nights spent in the other's arms — but still you didn't know what this was. 

"Let's go," you smiled, pressing a teasing kiss to the corner of his mouth. 

But you didn't care. 

As the two of you stepped into the elevator, his hand brushed yours, because you didn't want to lose it. 

"Yes sir, I understand. I'll be there," your eyes flicker up to see Rafael standing in the doorway, "okay goodbye." 

"Was that McCoy—" 

"Chewing me out for not attending yet another gala, unfortunately yes, and it looks like I'm being shanghaied into attending," you shake your head, groaning, "doesn't he have better things to do than force me to schmooze with the affluent and influential?" 

"So close to his re-election? No," he sits down, checking his phone, "he needs to have his best and brightest there, and that's why he wants us there." 

"'Us?'" the corner of his lip tilts upwards. 

"You're not the only one who got an irate phone call," he locks his phone, tucking it away, "we should both leave the office early so we can arrive on time," 

You check the time, cursing, "I have to get my outfit dry cleaned, but I have to write a motion—" 

"I can do it— my suit is ready and I told Liv I wouldn't pick her up until closer to the start—" 

You blink, your chest squeezing, "Liv?" 

He frowns, "Yeah I'm taking her tonight — as a favor — there's a case—" 

You waved him off, “You don’t have to explain, it’s fine,” you grab your coat and your bag, “I should go now and drop off my clothes—” 

He says your name, “You know I would want to go with you if we didn’t—” 

If you didn’t work together, if your hypocrite of a boss didn’t have a chip on his shoulder for workplace relationships— “I know,”  you reply, offering a small smile, if this was something more than what you knew it was— “I’ll see you tonight.” 

But it wasn’t. 

This was a nightmare. 

Truly. 

Forced to attend a gala alone with people you didn’t know very well, stuck in the corner by the bar, forced to watch the one person you wanted be with someone else. But you didn’t want to want him — you downed your drink, asking for a refill — the alcohol wasn’t the only thing bitter on your lips. 

“Glad to see you could make it, counselor,” Jack McCoy greeted you with a grin, offering you his hand in a firm handshake, “you look lovely.” 

“Well, my boss didn’t give me much of a choice,” you purse your lips, “something about my future at the District Attorney’s office and if I wished to have his support,” 

He chuckles, ordering his drink from the bartender (“a scotch, neat”), “I sense good things in your future. You have been a great addition to SVU — you challenge the detectives to bring better cases and you’re giving Barba a run for his money.” 

You spotted Rafael out of the corner of your eye, Liv on his arm, and you glanced away, sipping at your drink, tucking away your frustration behind a mask of boredom— “I suppose I am,” —albeit, maybe not fast enough. 

McCoy followed your gaze. He doesn’t say anything, instead offering his hand to you, “May I have this dance?” you raised an eyebrow, leaning against the bar. 

“You’re not trying to make me one of your famous work affairs, are you, Jack?” and he laughs, shaking his head, tilting his head. 

“I think I know better than that, counselor,” your eyes find Rafael again — dancing with Liv, quietly talking, and you take Jack’s hand. 

“I’d love to,” you follow him onto the dance floor, his hands resting respectfully above your waist just a new song began, “I should warn you I’m not the best dancer,” 

“Just follow my lead,” he assured you, a smile playing on his lips,  “and if you step on my feet, well I’ll have a good case for assault.” 

You rolled your eyes, before pursing your lips, “What’s this about, Jack?” 

“What do you mean?” it’s your turn to tilt your head, your arms resting on his shoulders, “I just wanted to say, I’ve been down that road before,” he spares a discreet glance at Rafael, “and it never ends well.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you keep your voice steady and confused, but Jack only raises an eyebrow, “There’s nothing going on—” 

“A whole of lot of nothing is what I’m worried about,” He kept the friendly smile, “I’ve done this enough times to know when nothing is actually nothing — and I know the look you had wasn’t nothing—” 

“Jack—” 

“I’m not speaking to you as your boss, for now,” his words were careful, a sharp edge of warning that slid harmlessly across your cheek, but you knew it wouldn’t again, “but I don’t want to see you hurt.” 

“I don’t want to either, but I know what I’m doing,” and Jack nods. 

“I know you do, and I’m not telling you how to live your life, but-- “ he shakes his head, “you deserve better than someone who hides you — take it from an old man who lost someone they loved when they were too busy hiding them.” 

You frown, “I—” and you felt a tap on your shoulder, Rafael standing between you two. 

“May I cut in?” he offers Jack a smile, who steps back. 

“Remember what I said, counselor,” Jack shakes Rafael’s hand, keeping his eyes on you,  “a bright future.” 

A slow waltz begins to play, and he grins at you, “Are you going to keep me waiting?” 

“What about Liv?” he jerks his head and you see her dancing with that attorney, Trevor Langan. 

“She’s busy, and she’s not the one I want to dance with,” and his smile falters, raising his eyebrows, “unless you don’t want to—” 

You deserve more, Jack’s words echo in your ears, and you wanted more — you wanted him, more than you wanted to admit — more than he wanted you to want him. 

“Of course I do,” you take his hand, a soft smile on his lips, his palm warm against your back, pulling you close. 

“You look so amazing,” he remarks, murmuring in your ear, his dulcet tones sending a shiver down your spine,  “I couldn’t take my eyes off of you.” 

“Really?” his fingers tilt your chin up to meet his gaze. 

“Yes, because I couldn’t stop thinking about what I wanted to take off,” his voice liquid heat, and your breath stuttered in your chest — his hands on your body were no longer enough, “what do you do to me, mi amor?”

“I could say the same to you,” you mutter, as he tugs you a little closer, blurring the line between professional and personal, “Do you think it’s a good idea that we’re dancing this close?” 

“What do you mean?” and you look around, scanning for any sight of Jack. 

“Our jobs — people could talk,” and he just shrugs, emerald eyes shining, as his lips quirk upward, as he dips you, pulling you back up with ease — the same ease he did everything with — the same ease he always put you at. 

“Then let them.” 

And you bite your lip, a small smile on your lips. Maybe this was enough. You knew what you were doing. You glance at Jack, who now stands at the bar, his brow wrinkled. 

Right? 

“Rafael,” you can’t catch your breath with him, his lips insistent and plying, as he presses you into the soft cushions of the mattress, “we have motions in—” you gasp as he sucks your skin above your pulse, “an hour and half.” 

But really you didn’t care about the motions — you didn’t care about being late —- you wanted to talk to him, about you — about the both of you — but he didn’t want to talk. 

“That means we have at least half an hour,” his hands squeezed your hips, and your body responded in kind, head tilting back, exposing your neck for his lips, “that means I can do what i was planning to do more than once.” 

“You’re awfully confident,” you sigh, your fingers knotted in his soft hairs at the base of his neck, and he presses a kiss right between your collarbone, his lips smiling against you. 

“I have an impressive track record, no?” he grins, “I don’t recall you complaining last night,” you rolled your eyes, tugging him higher, so his hair brushed your forehead. 

“You do, so much so that,” and you wonder if he can feel your heart pounding against your chest, “I wanted to talk to you about something.” 

He raises an eyebrow, pressing a kiss to your lips, “What about?” 

“What are we doing, Raf?” the words leave your mouth in a whisper — a single, gentle step onto a frozen lake, waiting for the ice to give way beneath you, “what is this to you?” 

He hesitates — the first crack resonates through the still morning, “I don’t know, what is it to you? What do you want?” 

I want more than just this, I want to be able to take you to galas, to kiss you outside of dark corners and corner booths— “I don’t know either—” 

“Then let’s not waste time by defining it,” his hand cups your cheek — the cracks splintered under your feet, the water erupting from the fissures, “Mi amor, I’ve had relationships before, I’ve seen them fall apart, I’ve watched people who love each other hurt each other, over and over again. I don’t want to do that to you,” he sighs, “I don’t want to lose you.” 

“I don’t want to either, but don’t you want more than this?” He holds your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing the length of your cheeks. 

“I just need you — no more, no less than just this,” Rafael presses a kiss to your palm, “can we keep it this way for a little longer?” 

You deserve more. You want more. You need more. 

He says your name again, and you offer a small smile, as you sink beneath the emerald colored water of his eyes. 

“Of course, Raf.” 

There’s a knock at your office, and you glance over at the call of your name, “Hey, I’m from SVU, I’m looking for Barba,” his lanky figure is standing in your doorframe, his dirty blond hair slicked back, “I’m here to pick up a—” 

“A warrant?” you nod, rifling through your files, “I got it right here for you, Detective…?” 

He offers a hand, “Dominick Carisi, but you can call me Sonny,” you shake his outstretched hand, “You’re Barba’s number two, right? I heard about you from the squad.” 

“Not how I’d like to be remembered, but essentially yes,” you shrug, before handing him the warrant, “just make sure to keep your search restricted to the places in that warrant and catalog everything properly— we don’t need to need to deal any issues—” 

“Chain of custody, yeah I know. I’m actually in law school right now,” he adds, “Fordham.” 

“That’s a great school,” you raise your eyebrows, “I’m sure it’s tough balancing it with your work as a detective — I barely survived my first year and that was without a full time job.”

“Well, what can I say, I’m determined,” he nods, holding up the warrant, “it was nice meeting you, counselor.” 

“You too, Detective Carisi—” 

“I told ya, call me Sonny,” he smiles from the doorway, and you chuckle, a warm smile blooming on your face. 

“Only if you call me by my name too, Sonny.”