#sooo many good visuals that chapter

[sweaterregrets]

Heavens 12- Crack! That! Egg

[chrollohearttags]

it's ☃️ here again and I have more questions but reverb edition bc I love how 3 dimensional the characters are...

1. Now what is rapper!connie's true IDEALL type (if he actually has one). like he's immediately folding and falling to his knees because she's everything he wants type shit.

2. Do any of the pole assassins ladies swing the other way perchance...? IDK if you mentioned this but i'm getting a vibe...perchance.

3. What are mika and jean's favorite things about one another?

4. How would eren react to being posted on the shaderoom and having them get in his business? I recently saw a video of summer walker flipping the shaderoom off and I screamed 😭😭

5. IDK if you didn't go into detail but is sasha an influencer here as well or an artist?

6. Does eren like any other forms of art besides music/writing in this universe? I don't feel EJ is the type to like go walk a museum (or maybe he is) but I feel he definitely holds some appreciation for like visual arts yk??

7. Is influencer!y/n any good at games? I remember you mentioning him being a gamer and I had the idea of him teaching her to play madden or COD or some shit and her being sooo bad to the point where he gets a little upset bc no way you're this bad at the game.

once again that is all the questions my brain has come up with, until next time *fades off into background*

hello again, snowanon!! 🤍 I swear you always come with the best asks. I’m actually working on reverb right now so thanks for this! (sorry these took so long btw!)

1. now Connie isn’t the type of dude to discriminate when it comes to the ladies. He loves them all but he will undoubtedly fall in love (and maybe propose on the spot) for a tall women or BBW. he loves him a girl who’s taller than him or a plus size lady. I’d say his range is anywhere from Meg to Lizzo. But he really just a loves a woman who can make him laugh. Somebody he can clown with.

2. Yes 3/5 do in fact! 😭 our girl (y/n) is bisexual. Eren is honestly the only man she loves. Niesha is pansexual + Syrai is lesbian. Kelley and Brianne have only ever dated men but they’re not against the idea of being with a woman!

3. omg I literally love these two so much and I hadn’t had a chance to elaborate yet but Jean and Mika are each other’s saving graces, dramatic as it sounds. Jean helped Mika stand up for herself when she felt powerless and she helped him realize his dream and that he was worth more than being on the sidelines. I think Jean’s favorite thing about Mika is her determination and how smart she is. If she wants something done, nothing can stop her. She’s headstrong but she’s soft in the same turn. Not in a weak way or that she wants to be babied but she’s so compassionate and emotional about the things + people she loves. As for Mika, she loves how much of a natural leader Jean is. He’s dominating but in the best way possible. He knows she can handle her own business but she doesn’t have to when he’s around. She can be comfortable in her feminine energy without feeling weak. All in all, they just compliment one another so well!

4. LMAO! the day Eren ever ends up on the ShadeRoom, everybody’s getting their feelings hurt. 😭 what makes it so bad is that it would probably be for some dumb shit, like them trying to messy about he and (y/n)’s relationship and now he gotta cuss everybody and their family dog out :(

5. so the next few chapters are going to feature Sasha heavily but my baby is actually Mikasa’s assistant for the time being. Her ultimate goal is to do music, more so as like a country hip-hop artist. She’s basically mentoring under her and Jean both.

6. Eren does have a great appreciation for other art forms. He has a few unique and expensive paintings in his home and he himself loves to draw. Many of his tattoo pieces are artworks of his. He also enjoys stage plays, shockingly! (he’s really a theater kid cosplaying as a delinquent, don’t let him fool you 😭😭) but he enjoys reading from time to time as well.

7. okay listen! my sis be giving it her all to beat this man LMAO. Eren is so damn competitive that he can’t just play shit for fun, he makes everyone want to fight him. But the one game he does NAWT want to see her in is Tekken. That’s been her favorite series since she was a kid and she gives him the work every single time.

[dollsuguru]

THANK YOU FOR THE TAG @connorsui <3 MWAH! 🩷

last song i listened to:

- all three of these <3 first one i was listening to (satosugu coded song btw it’s so good) and then i just listened to this next song after it and WHEW… visuals & singing are out of this world omfg hyein KILLED it <333 the second song (shh..) is sooo suguru/kenjaku coded omfg both the amazing music video AND the lyrics… don’t ask me why or how that’s simply what my brain thinks <3 and then the last one… my fav song from the series it was in the most recent episode and i listened to it for god knows how many hours while reading 70 chapters of the manga

currently watching:

- i’m rewatching “the apothecary diaries” omfg… jinshi my beloved husband <3 I HIGHLY RECOMMEND EVERYONE TO WATCH IT PLEASE IT’S SO GOOD <3

currently obsessed with:

- “the apothecary diaries” manga… literally read all 70 chapters in a day & a half and now i’m up to date (methinks) <3 also found out that suguru’s VA voices jinshi in the audio drama cd… my literal NICHE bc i literally think jinshi is a mix of suguru & bratty teen toru! but anyways jinshi’s anime VA is soooooo good omg now i’m rambling just pleek watch it is all i’m saying <3

also i’m working on a prof!geto x bookstore worker!reader fic for a request! AND for myself (another niche) i have a fashion designer!reader x art museum curator!geto fic that i’m really passionate about! <3

no pressure tags:

(only if y’all want to! <3) @softgirlgonehaywire @elusivemoon @staryukis @twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat @nomadwrites & anyone else who sees this and wants to do it! :’)

[r3dblccd]

NINE PEOPLE I'D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER

last song: Water by Ten (it's sooo good)

favorite color: If I had to pick, then I'd say red

currently watching: Nothing currently. I watch some YT videos. I usually watch TV shows at night, but now my nights are occupied with reading (like, I had to read Decameron, thankfully not the whole thing, in a week, now I have to read Macbeth in a week, I still have have to finish Eugene Onegin, after I finish those next on the list is Don Quixote, which, our tutor would want every single one us us the read the whole thing, I also have to check at least a bit of In Praise of Folly by Erasmus Rotterdam and goddamn just by looking at the contents of how many chapters are there I can tell it's long. I am just at the beginning of Dante's Inferno and I do also want to check out at least Purgatorio even though our tutor said it's not compulsory to read the whole trilogy. There are also a few, again, not compulsory reads that I still want to check out. And I haven't paused my reading outside of what we have to read for our literature disciplines with Douglas Adams' The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide because I'm already so deep into the book, I don't want to just pause it and lose my rhythm when I get back to it and because I hate myself. The life of a philology student is just so beautiful, isn't it. Save me, kill me.)

spicy/savory/sweet: I think I lean more towards, but I do like savory food and a bit of spicy, but not too spicy or Imma cry

relationship status: Happily single

current obsession: I am mesmerized by some of the visuals for rave parties (I think they are rave parties, idk?). I got traumatized by the Shrek video though (I saw it, you all have to see it too now, but tw for flashing lights if you click to see the video)

TAGGED BY: @unfinishedjulyrain TAGGING: @vienrose, @midncghts, @irrwicht, @weedzkiller, @luneblush, @formorethananame, @frxgmcnts, @dozenrozez, @temporalobjects

[otakween]

0-Man - Volume 2

These volumes are taking me ages to get through. They're good and fun reads but sooo dense and full of kanji I can't read. Most of the charm comes from the visuals anyway, so I think it's still worthwhile to pick up if you're at the intermediate level like me.

Chapters 14 & 15

Chapter one was really short so I'm combining things. We kick off after the end of volume 1. The gang accidentally set off a chain reaction of volcanoes. The bad guys try to freeze the ensuing eruption, but that just starts a huge blizzard which will lead to the ice age of their freezing machine isn't stopped. Dun dun dunnn.

I was relieved to get a little levity with the Professor acting nice again and everyone sitting down for dinner. The gag of Ricky's mom being bad at human cooking was pretty lame though (I'm sick of the "a woman who can't cook???" joke in anime).

We got another dead parent!? Sheesh so many deaths in this series. At least Pete didn't really like his dad anyways.

Ricky's tail gets all messed up in this chapter after a plank of wood falls on it and he has to yank it out. For a second I thought he ripped part of it off, but I don't think they'd do that. (Edit: they absolutely do do that).

New 0 men lore: they have a very high tolerance for cold and heat. I kinda feel like they threw that in there to excuse the fact that Ricky's always in short shorts lol

Ch. 16

The professor meets with other academics to explain the current situation and to prove the existence of 0 men. He essentially makes Ricky reveal his tail without his consent which was kind of uncomfy. But the world is literally ending, so I'll allow it lol

So they ultimately decide they need to nuke Japan to destroy the ice machine. Seems like it would be pretty hard to evacuate an entire country fast enough to do that, but okay...

I wonder how often nukes are the answer in apocalyptic stories? I read a book awhile back about giant spiders taking over the planet and nukes were the answer in that situation too. That book was wild...

Ch. 17

The Japanese public evacuate but the 0-men stay behind because...??? I don't really know. Maybe they just have a good nuke shelter or something? Or maybe they need to help the professor.

The joke about children being better behaved than adults during the evacuation was great. I feel like that can be true sometimes because kids are used to the structure of school and learning their manners whereas adults are further removed from those lessons. (Also kids tend towards being less mean spirited in general).

Two new human men are introduced purely for slapstick it seems like. Their jokes are very Three Stooges old timey. I was rolling my eyes, but it's wholesome at least. It was cute when they tied scarves to their pants to be polite (when they saw Ricky's mom's tail).

Abruptly, Ricky's mom gets carted away by sketchy men who want to experiment on her. Dun dun dunnnn

Ch. 18

Tezuka sure packed a lot into this chapter. The gang saved Ricky's mom, had a shoot out, escaped to the professor's base and then the villain kinda forgave Ricky because he protected the base from a bomb? Whirlwind.

By the way, I don't know anyone's names because I can't read kanji names lol (katakana names are all good though)

This chapter was pretty violent! I was momentarily traumatized by Ricky's mom's leg and tail snapping off until they revealed it was a mannequin. It was still kind effed up to see! Also Ricky just spears a dude almost to death. Hardcore for a little guy.

On top of the violence, seeing someone being experimented on with dry ice as they yell "please, I'm a living being!!" is pretty distressing as well. I don't even know for sure if everything's gonna be fine because they already killed off a few people...

Ch. 19

Dangit, I wish this was translated by...anybody! There isn't even a fan translation. I'm just barely scraping by with my kanji reading skills but I'm missing out on a lot. For example, Ricky and the other 0 men refuse to evacuate to the underground. Why? IDK...Also, the nuke seemingly does nothing after they launch it. Did they explain why? Maybe, but I missed it if they did. Oh well...I still get the jist.

Seeing everyone prep for the launch of the missile and pre-mourn the loss of their country was really sad. I'm glad such plot points aren't too taboo in Japan. They explore this stuff a lot.

Ch. 20

And this is the chapter where I remember that Tezuka was definitely a furry lol. I don't say that mockingly, I love his animal/anthro illustrations. They just feature so prominently in his work.

Pretty crazy to find out that Ricky's dad is still alive like a zillion chapters after he "died." I mean...saw it coming, but the timing is unusual.

The shenanigans were fun this time because they realize it's "Muu Muu day" in the 0-man kingdom. This is apparently a day where everyone dresses up like animals, including humans, so a human showing up isn't suspicious. Ricky looked really cute in his squirrel costume.

I've gradually started to notice more creative panel arrangements and lettering showing up. It's interesting to see Japanese characters written in wacky ways that I'm not used to. Seems like it would be tricky to write kanji in bubble letters...

Ch. 21

Sheeesh, this manga is wild. It almost feels like every chapter there's some new apocalyptic event. Also, a surprising amount of death.

The cliffhanger ending for this chapter was Ricky and his dad plummeting from space in a spaceship, crash landing and then dad finding Ricky's disembodied tail!?

Okay, there's no way that Ricky really lost his iconic tail. What's the explanation gonna be this time...? (Edit: Nope, he actually lost his tail).

Ch. 22

This chapter had everything: random Popeye cameo, casual racism towards Fiji and Native Americans, and a Titanic parody where the Titanic was called the Tihenic (get it, because taihen? I laughed...)

So instead of global warming we have global freezing. An interesting concept nowadays. I guess the polar bears would flourish? Or would they still suffer because they need some water to hunt...hmmm

This was a Ricky-free chapter. Instead we caught up with Pete in America who is apparently staying with a new professor whose name I forgot immediately. His hair is pretty terrible. Pete and professor bad hair are being forced to build a rocket so that this evil dude can escape Earth. Sounds like something Elon would do lol

Ch. 23

Okay, so Ricky really did lose his tail, that's crazy. He's practically just a normal boy now.

It was really depressing when Ricky's dad thought he was finally experiencing some human kindness only for them to betray him :'(

I feel like we've kinda lost the plot at this point. Or maybe this manga was always intended to be episodic? The apocalyptic ice age stuff still lingers in the background, but the 0-man characters are kind of just ignoring that and trying to survive. (Edit: that plot line does come back as the main focus).

Ch. 24

Damn, someone needs to get Ricky a new pair of pants. Poor kid is just going around with a huge rip on the bottom.

The revelation that Ricky's lost some of his balance due to not having a tail anymore was interesting. I wonder if prosthetic tails exist in this universe?

Not really sure how Ricky ended up finding Pete and Professor Royal (learned his name). Good to see the gang back together even though they weren't apart for very long to begin with lol.

The gag with the driver crying over Ricky and being given wind shield wipers for his eyes was cute

Ch. 25

Lol is it just me or were they all concerned with saving Ricky and then they just immediately gave up and started building rockets instead? I guess they've assumed he's dead by now.

So the bad guy having a rocket built for himself (and maybe his lackeys) and the good guys are trying to build enough rockets to allow all of humanity to escape Earth. It's a little too relatable how they've decided that Earth is beyond saving climate-wise.

[chattegeorgiana]

Hey Chatte, hope all is well!

One of my favorite my art pieces from Kaika so far is the picture of the Uzumaki clan with an adult Arashi. I’m a sucker for lore especially for shows/comcis/managa that I love. I’m interested in the history of the Uzumaki clan and how it changed from the matriarchy to the patriarchy and how Ashina came to power. I’m also excited on how Naruto and Karin relationship is going to play out and it looks like that will come first before her eventual meeting with Sasuke. I also like how you are giving her and Sakura agency. (Yes we want them to get together with their respective partners) but I’m excited to see how their own personal stories move forward. Finally that art piece that has Naruto and Sakura as sun gods, you think they be a chance with Sasuke and Karin as moon gods? Can’t drop an awesome concept like and be done with it, and we have to their children to as a little pantheon lol.

Heyaa,

Welcome back to my inbox, haha! So good to have you back. :D

Glad to hear you liked the adult Arashi picture. Hope I can expand more on the characters there visually as well.

The thing is I have sooo many ideas in my head. I only wish I had the finances to act upon all these ideas lol.

Anyway, as for the Uzumaki clan, I hope you guys will love the lore I have for the exchange from the matriarchy or Ohirume to Ashina's patriarchy. It'll involve something really juicy, if you ask me, haha.

I just hope you guys will find it as juicy as I do in my head, lol. It's all in my mind, I just need to get to it.

Like I said on my other socials, I'm currently planning on writing Kaika's 13th chapter, after which I plan on taking a break from that because I wanna fully focus on plotting the story in arcs.

I already have the timeline finished from a looooong time ago, I just never got to the point where I actually arrange it into arcs & see how I can display all that history & background I worked on.

As for Karin and Sakura, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed that because honestly, from a writing perspective that has been a top priority of mine - for the girls to have their own agencies outside of the boys, even if I wanna go with those respective pairings.

As for the artpiece, it's already ordered. I wanted to have it as a surprise but you spoiled it for yourself. :P

But yeah, I already ordered it and it will definitely fit with the entire pantheon haha. You'll see more when I publish it.

PS: You now gave me another idea with SK (both the kids and the parents). *writes idea down to commission it at some point*

[phoenix-is-the-hottest-thing]

were there any things you genuinely enjoyed about the latest main story chapters? don't mean in a "damn you don't like anything" way, but rather a genuine question

Yes!! Thank you for asking. I don't like focusing on the bad so much but it just keeps coming up...

I had tons of fun with Senti! She's a breath of fresh air, cute and fun and finally gets to showcase her growth.

I like this open world's minigames much more than the previous ones, they're way more fun and well, open world-y, there's more to them than just fighting. Too bad we're way past the redemption point for those.

I also like the machine dreaming concept and the minigame for it!

Some of the new enemies' visual effects are sooo pretty. Especially the crystal ones!

I really like HoTru's design, it's brilliant.

HUA SHOWED UP I MISSED HER...

Durandal being so so so glad to see Kiana safe was adorable hehe

The PE fragments thing is a very good idea in concept, love that, getting closure for Erwin and Emile's fates was nice for example.

And of course the Gray Serpent gang is absolutely bonkers fun, love learning more about Mobi's many many sons (and daughters! They confirmed that too! Very nice).

[justwritedreams]

MAAAAARIIIIII I JUST WANNA SAY THE LATEST CHAPTER OF WELCOME TO THE KINGDOM IS SOO PERFECTTTT, SOOOO WORTH THE WAIT!!!!! AND I JUST FEEL THAT YOUR WRITING KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER!!!! THE WAY YOU TELL THE STORY THIS TIME IS EVEN MORE //MAGICAL AND BEAUTIFUL// 😭😭💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

i think it must have taken you a lot of time to formulate this entire chapter 😭😭😭😭😭 cuz it's sooooo smooothhhh like everything, every single line there was absolutely essential 😭😭😭❤❤❤❤❤

can i just say these two have sooo much self-controlllll? (IT'S INSANEEEE 😭😭😭) THE MOST DISCIPLINED INDIVIDUALS I KNOW (BESIDES IRL MARK LEE 🤣🤣🤣).

BUT YES, KEEP TORTURING USSSSS, KEEEP TORTURING THEEEEEMMMMMMMMM,

CUZ I KNOW WHEN THAT CORD SNAPPED, WOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH THE LOVE WILL KEEEP POURING IN AND IN AND THEY WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO LEAVE EACH OTHER!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭

#CANTWAITTOFINDOUTWHOISTHEMORECLINGYONECHALLENGE

AND YOOOOOO THE DRESS!!!!! just sounds so beautiful 🥺🥺🤍🤍🤍🤍 can i have the visual reference? 🥺🥺😭😭😭😭

ps: i wanna be the princess in your story!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

AND LASTLY YOUR HOT HOT SPICY DREAMMMMMMMMMMMM SO NICEEEEE SO LUCKYYYYYY I ENVYYYYYYY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

💗 PLS, YOU !DESERVE! THIS FOR ALL YOU'VE GIVEN US!!! 💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞 💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💘💘💘💘💘💓💓💓💓💓💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

obrigada, my darling ❤❤❤❤❤

You never fail to make me speechless 😭😭 thank you so much 💚💚

I actually had a little more work to write this chapter because, in addition to all the unforeseen events that happened in my life in the last few months, writing smut is still a challenge for me. I confess that I was a little insecure to post this chapter 🙊

I like to research, watch scenes from movies and series that inspire me to be able to imagine and then write. And I only feel comfortable writing when I'm alone in the room, that's when inspiration flows, and lately I haven't been able to be alone 🥲

Honestly, if it was me in real life I would have jumped the table and kissed Jeno right there 🤣🤣 but it's more fun that way, isn't it? 😏

I have so many expectations for this moment I can't wait, I even created a special playlist for that!

This one, I found it on Pinterest and thought it was so beautiful, I had to put it in the story!

I know I have to honor the name of my blog but I was surprised at myself for dreaming this kind of thing up 🙈

You are so good to me, I don't even know how to thank you 😭🫶🏻

[7ban-sama]

Heyy ;) JSHK is heartbreaking isn’t it? As for me I cried 4 times over the manga (which is a miracle because I NEVER CRY THAT MUCH IN A SERIES), sooo have you cried over some chapters?

Oh I've cried soo many times for this series, it's kind of hard to count. Though I can't say it's a rare or uncommon thing for me... I'm honestly quick to cry over the littlest things. 9.9; So it's not surprising for me, that I've cried multiple times. I get choked up easily too... ah, I'm very emotional, and just tend to respond to 'emotional cues' easily. If the movie is playing sad music, and wants me to be sad, I will be sad... I can't really resist that.

But while it's not hard to get me to cry, I will say that JSHK is unique in that, I think it makes me feel a very deep sense of agony... Since making me cry is very easy to do, I don't think of it as an actual testament to whether or not the scene was good, or well written, and I can shake it off and just move on easily enough. It's different when the sadness feels like it sinks into my bones... makes me writhe and twist... And ah, sometimes it just flat out stings more, instead of just making me weepy — hurting my jaw, throat, palms...

I'll list some specific chapters... I think I'll also break it up between things that made me cry on first read vs. rereads.

yosh... ikimashou!

FIRST READ

Vol 1 / Ch 1: Hanako-san of the Bathroom

This is actually more of an 'honorable mention', since I wasn't full blown weeping or anything. But I had a lump in my throat and got wet-eyed over it, which feels notable, just starting off.

I remember being really surprised that we get into Nene's head like this... I wasn't expecting it-? It feels very brutal, honestly, to watch her reflect on her shallowness like this. Having to realize this 'crush' was more of a self-serving fantasy, than anything, and she wasn't really thinking about who Teru was as a person... This is a foible I think many people go through, more than they're willing to admit. More than they can even recognize...? So it was pretty surprising to see it laid out like this, at the start of the manga. A premonition of what was to come... (this manga surprising me again and again!)

Vol 2 / Ch 7: The Misaki Stairs (Part 4)

Now this... is a testament to how 'contained' a narrative can be, yet how much I can be enveloped in the feelings of it. I think Yako isn't a very central character, and I don't especially favor her or anything, but I like her introduction. I like her circumstance...

The childish writing of young Yako, who seems very new to the world, and unused to deep interaction with humans. I honestly love this sort of 'interspecies' relationship... along with age gap (lol) ; it provides a contrast I enjoy. I like that Yako is being taught how to read and write by Misaki... simply tasteful. Praise to Iro-sensei.

I feel my heart sink, alongside Nene's, once we get to these entries...

And by the time we get to the yorishiro memory itself, I can't help crying. I cry a little almost every time I really immerse into reading these chapters... The Yako who is hunched over, saying, I want Misaki to yell at me again really gives me chills... I understand what she is feeling here. Wanting your love back at all costs... ahhh. :'I

Vol 4 / Ch 4: The Little Mermaid (Part 2)

a small, choked up feeling, a small cry. but a cry nonetheless... the visual of their pinkie promise gets to me. Nene's sparkly eyes... for this whole scene, her horns are droopy because of being wet, and it gives her an innocent quality. like a dumbo rat... baby girl

Vol 12 / Ch 58: The End of a Dream (Part 3)

the closing chapter of the PP arc... an arc lasting several volumes, sending one through a roller-coaster of emotions-!! my first read of PP made my heart race, doki doki. I was actually mostly psyched up by it, very excited by the events. Not so weepy. Buut, it's only appropriate that the closing chapter is what gets to me.

this panel honestly shakes me to my core. knowing that Tsukasa is metaphorically the moon... and that Nene is the one saying this... something about it feels like an omen. I think it's a good omen, and yet, it frightens me deeply anyways. I feel like I have great reason to be afraid lol... like, oh, god, the moon IS closer than it's ever been, isn't it... (dread)

ugh, trying to not post every panel from this scene... but Nene is so pristine and angelic and well meaning in this all. her end of it is SO SINCERE... up here, in the clouds together, whirling all about... declaring her dreams... sigh. It's not fair it's like this all loads into a gun to hurt her for the Severance...

(I feel like it's around here that I really am falling for her, as a character... *sigh* *touches screen...*)

Vol 17 / Ch 81: The Red House (Part 6)

I'm sure this isn't a surprise by now, but, yeah... this one really tore me apart. by this point, my feefees for Tsukasa had incubated long enough that it was really devastating to learn so much about his child psyche. (it's getting so real for my crushes on the girlies by now.)

it's devastating that Tsukasa is capable of feeling this. meanwhile, earlier... this scene.

it always hurts to get to the confrontation... it never stops hurting. it'll hurt forever, I'm sure.

I've also struggled with chronic illness and disability as well. so... ah, I understand what Amane is going through here, profoundly. At your gd limit... just, can't keep doing this... yeah

would you believe that my wife would lick my tears, early in our relationship...? I was once a very miserable, depressed, lonely person. I used to think no one would ever love me, and that I cried so often it was annoying. At times, when overwhelmed by our early interactions (they were so amazing, and I felt so lowly and undeserving) I would just break down. she'd just kiss and lick my tears and eyes...

In general I just have a lot of personal reasons to be sentimental about the gestures / dialogue throughout this chapter.

a panel for the ages... cementing Tsukasa's role as an angelic, wish-granter. I LOVE YOU BAYBEEEE-!! love you forever.

Vol 18 / Ch 89: Oni (Part 2)

Now, let it be known... I love.... LOVE-!! Everything about Hakubo and Sumire's story... I feel so much for each of them, their circumstance, it's soo painful! I pretty much always feel the 'drop' as I read these chapters, but this is the one that got me upon first seeing it.

it's the helplessness of Hakubo... the way he just doesn't know what to do, the way his inhumane treatment by humans has made him never consider that he can love, the way he can't make decisions on his own. He wishes to be commanded... it's all he knows. Why won't she just tell me to save her...?

The way he describes not feeling anger, sadness, or hatred / alongside the panels of him getting hunted down by humans… Only left with the sense of regret that he should have done something for her, that night. Ahh... it's incredibly beautiful and painful... thank you AidaIro for this perfect blend of beautiful visuals and painful prose </3...

Vol 20 / Ch 101: Omen (Part 1)

For our final entry in this category, it's a record breaker. the mere sight of this living Tsukasa made tears well up in my eyes.

it's too much for me… this specific age of Tsukasa, in canon, has been so elusive and rare. We've only had a peek at him through a Hell of Mirrors illust. and that is still his corpse... the LIVING, breathing, pre-shinjuu boy, is divine to be met with. I really couldn't believe we could see him now.

now that I know he is singing 'Over the Rainbow', there's no saving meeee...

REREADS

Vol 2 / Ch 8: The Confession Tree

ok. this is one of those things where, I know I'm not gonna make a lot of sense as I explain... since this is a raw, kinnie-brain thing, but my disclaimer is that i'm self aware about how unreasonable this is-!! ok.

when I first read through this chapter, I was still in my 'getting to know her' phase, with Nene... thus, I was endeared by her romantic heart, but wasn't (for lack of a better term) in love with her. I think I experienced this chapter more like 'an audience member'.

after coming to terms with Being Amane... this chapter is very difficult for me. It's gone from me feeling like an audience member, to feeling like an active participant — like, responsible for hurting her.

I failed such an innocent girlie. it is hard to cope with. sometimes I feel like she should never forgive me for this...

metatextually, it's like, when I was first reading this manga, I didn't think I would care so much about her / much like, I think Amane is not aware at all how much he is going to be heaving and crying over his feelings for Nene, so many volumes later... We don't know how special this girl is, yet.

I've cried over this scene and have fallen into a terrible depression for like, weeks, over it, LOL.. these things, you just have to take my word for it, that it's part of being Amane. It's hard to forgive your own carelessness.

Vol 9 / Ch 45: Picture Perfect (Part 5)

oooh. what can be said... it both makes me emotional that Tsukasa looks so lovely here / and that Tsukasa is allowed to have full page spreads, as the focal point...

having just dropped the telescope. stiff-legged, shirt billowing... she is a captivating specimen.

dazzling... gorgeous... and so earnestly experiencing the pretty sky, the shooting stars — eagerly turning to amane to announce this! ahh... that after all these years, tsukasa can have a moment like this with amane... hurts me so.

Vol 10 / Ch 50: Picture Perfect (Part 10)

my first reads of PP felt thrilling... I was so excited to see how far this manga could go. and for an arc to last so long, it was very captivating. I suppose though, this is another one of those things that has steadily weighed heavier on me as I connected more and more with Amane.

The expression here... it's the weight of everything coming crashing down on him, in real time, I think. Again, he was not... prepared for how much Nene was going to mean to him. He's spent so long not caring about who lives, dies. He's becoming unraveled by this all...

and this framing of Nene... it twists a knife in my heart. combined with how it echoes the way Amane is starstruck from Tsukasa in the earlier chapter... sighhhh!

Vol 11 / Ch 51: Perfect Empty Ideals

It just hurts so mmmbad-!!! man I can't be deep about it all, this just makes me SAD-!!!!!! I LOVE YOU GIRL!!! SORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING.

Vol 14 / Ch 66: Sumire (Part 1)

After learning everything about Hakubo and Sumire's lives, this vignette is very heart-wrenching. This is the cave they took refuge from the rain, once, that their final moments are then in.

Such a beautiful ship... such beautiful drawings... again thank you AidaIro-sensei...

Vol 16 / Ch 78: The Red House (Part 3)

This chapter was of course VERY PAINFUL!! when I first read it, but I think by now it's settled into my gut heavier than ever before. And basically all of the Red House arc scenes related to the Yugi rend me apart... I can't push the image limit any more in this post though, so I'll just represent it with this. But just know all of it makes me roll around in my grave...

What could Tsukasa have felt in this moment, learning about Amane's imminent death... Knowing how much Tsukasa loves Amane, I think a future without him was just pointless. I get the impression he was spending all his time running off and procuring Amane presents, now that Amane has become too sick to play with him.

Sometimes I'm in such awe, still, that we learned Tsukasa would come to Amane's bedside and provide him little gifts. As much as his little 3 year old self was capable of... and, he's capable of feeling lowly/worthless, and like Amane hates him… urgh-!! *commits seppuku*

Anyways I hope this list... well, conveys that I'm emotional and unstable LOL... (nah, but really, I hope it was interesting!) Here's to more crying over this manga, again and again!

[iamnotawomanimagod]

I finally have a chance to sit down and reflect on the Halsey show.

In one word - incredible.

Big spoilers for the Love and Power tour below - I'm going to go over as many songs and moments as I can!

It started with The Tradition, which was especially interesting at Red Rocks because it's an amphitheater (naturally formed by red rock, hence the name), so she when she opened the show on the catwalk rig, it really took a moment to see where she was, and it let the visuals really shine

Speaking of which - fucking AMAZING visuals, all of the graphics for each song fit so well and the lighting was so perfect. Plus there was pyrotechnics and fireworks...it was crazy. I've been to two other Red Rocks shows and this was by far the biggest and most impressive production I've seen there.

The video packages in between songs and sections were so well thought out and really underlined the horror element. I think what I loved the most was how grotesque it got - the visuals were truly disturbing, including stuff like eye gore/horror, one scene where she bangs her head against a sink until her teeth fall out, one of her all wrapped up post-surgery... it was very effective and creepy imagery and it definitely added a whole other level of flavor to the songs

There was even this moment in the middle where they were like "this next part is really sugary sweet and pop-y" and they played songs like Be Kind, Colors, So Good, etc - and the visuals morphed a little more to reflect that, becoming a little sweeter, which was especially cool because that was the "Release" and "Reflect" chapters of the setlist

Plus they had these really beautiful spoken word interludes... I hope someone has transcribed them or recorded them, I really want to see them again. I only recorded a few things because I was so caught up in the show that I completely forgot to take my phone out, haha.

I was so so happy with what they played, I ended up being really excited about a lot of the changes, since I've been following the setlist so closely all tour, lmao. So when she said "tonight's show is gonna be a little different than the rest of the tour" I lost my mind. I mentioned it before but they played "Hold Me Down" and "Heaven in Hiding" and "You asked for this" which were all songs I didn't think I'd hear at all. And I prefer all of those over their alternate songs from other parts of the tour.

They said that Red Rocks is like their living room because they've played it so much, and that it's special to them because it's where they had their first real conversation with Alev. But they also said it was the site of (what they consider) one of their worst-ever shows, during the HFK tour. Someone nearby yelled "It was really good!!" which was cute.

I ended up in a great part of the crowd. One of the weird things about Red Rocks - and I bet this is true for a lot of venues, but especially for Red Rocks - it's such a special and beautiful place to see live music (Halsey literally called it "the most beautiful venue in the world" which like, BRAG) that a lot of times you'll get people there who don't know the artist at all and are just there to see a show at Red Rocks. There was such an interesting blend of ages because of that - everyone from tweens/teens to college kids to people in their 30s and 40s, and even like, a handful of much older people. So it definitely wasn't just an arena full of Halsey stans, haha.

I was a little disappointed, but H put on an incredible show, so I can't imagine anyone leaving not at least a little bit impressed by them. There were a lot of parents with their kids, which was cute - we actually ended up next to a family, a mom and a dad and their kid, and it was the kid's first concert. And the mom and dad were dancing and singing along, and being so supportive, it was sooo sweet. And the mom confided in my best friend that she was worried that her kid wasn't having a good time, so we tried to dance with them - but honestly I think they were a bit overwhelmed, I definitely would've been too at that age.

And on my other side was this gorgeous gorgeous person, I'm not sure if they were gay or nonbinary or just queer, but they were wearing a flawless face of makeup and working this mustache along with it. (Honestly? Incredible place for outfits and looks, people really went all out and it was all really edgy, fun, Halsey-inspired looks. I even saw a girl in Halsey's outfit from "You should be sad") But the person next to me and I vibed so much, we kept screaming the lyrics together and making jokes and stuff - and making a concert friend is one of the best things that can happen at a concert, such a lovely and intimate and honest encounter, even better because it was so fleeting!

I couldn't see the stage suuuuper well, I was definitely in the middle of the amphitheater and someone kinda tall was in front of me, lol. So I ended up watching the screens a lot. But when I did manage to catch her on the stage, I was blown away by how short she is, pahaha. They have such huge stage presence, it's easy to forget. And they really had to work to make the show engaging, because they were the main focus for the entire two hours. They never flagged or complained or dropped their energy.

but I might be getting too old for concerts, lol. My feet literally went numb, and I definitely had to sit down a few times. I'm ngl, there were a couple of lulls and some songs I don't think <.< needed to be on the setlist. Like "The Lighthouse" is an amazing song, but I don't think it's very good live. It felt like it really killed the energy, tbh. >.> That was probably the one song I really wish they had skipped. That and maybe "So Good." But it gave me a chance to sit down, pahaha, so it worked out. For the record, I know not every song should be high-energy, that would make for a boring and overstimulating show - but like, "Darling" and "100 Letters" were slower songs that were still super captivating in a way that "The Lighthouse" just.......wasn't.

But oh my god......y'all, I cried during "Darling" and then on into "100 Letters." I mean they literally started "Darling" by saying "A lot of people think I wrote this song for my son, but I actually wrong it for my first babies. I wrote it for you guys." and of course I was like "awwww" but then when everyone pulled out a light and Halsey sang it I just got so emotional. Like something about the line "until it's time to see the light, I'll make my own with you each night" hits so so SO different when you're literally standing in a sea of lights among other people who love Halsey as much as you do. And then they went into "100 Letters" and it was the stripped version, and that's one of my all-time favorite songs by them, and then line "but I don't let him touch me anymore" just means so much to me, and so when she sang that the floodgates just opened. (My friend who was with me had a very similar experience with "Graveyard" - Halsey's music just Does That.)

"Whispers" is incredible live. They looked so intense, and the difference between the whispers being, well, whispered, versus screamed by a crowd, just adds this whole other incredible element to it. I love songs where something painful and personal becomes something that brings people together, that lets people connect and feel less alone.

And during "Nightmare" everyone was singing and screaming so loud, and jumping up and down, and when the abortion stats were on screen everyone just started screaming even louder. And afterwards, Halsey talked about their thoughts on Roe v Wade, and talked about how if she hadn't had an abortion she wouldn't be here, her son wouldn't be here. And some people walked out (or chose a super bad time to go to the bathroom) but she just went right on talking about why it was so important. And then they led the "my body, my choice" chant and it was just. so cathartic, and healing. and empowering.

And all of the classics - Gasoline and Castle and Hold Me Down and Bad at Love and Colors and Hurricane - were as amazing to see as I knew they would be.

I can't believe the setlist was 26 songs, it went by so fast, it didn't feel like two hours at all. If it weren't for how sore I was (and lowkey sick, my stomach didn't like all the jumping around and I had to puke in the parking lot,) I would've stood there all night listening to them sing and talk.

They sound so so so amazing live. Like I think some of the power of their voice is lost on recordings. Red Rocks also has some of the best acoustics for concerts in the world, so that just made everything she sang sound even better. But I was constantly impressed by how beautiful and rich and powerful their voice was. Halsey's vocals have never been the most important thing about her to me - I'm definitely a bigger fan of their lyrics and their concepts and their visual art style. But that concert gave me a whole new appreciation for how talented they are as a vocalist.

It was like. Truly one of the most incredible nights of my life. I'll post some videos if you guys promise not to make fun of my voice lmao. I was definitely not concerned with how I sounded, I was just taking the recordings for me, so there is talking/my own singing over it. Fair warning, haha.

But yeah. I'm so grateful that I got to go. I'll never forget it. I didn't think it was possible for me to love and respect Halsey more as an artist, performer, and singer, but I walked away from that show with even more appreciation for her.

just.... wow.

[alikaheroes]

WOW!! What a night. I can finally say I’ve seen @halsey in concert 🥺😭❤️ So thankful! Such a fun time! 💖💖 #LoveAndPowerTour

*Added July 16

Halsey: Love and Power Tour 2022

Five Point Amphitheater 

Irvine, CA 

Saturday, July 9, 2022 

The FivePoint Ampitheater is outdoors and looks amazing

Cornhole games!

Got my Whispers bag for merch (will print the poster at home LOL) 

Chicken strips, fries, and a Pepsi

Random friends: Mom with her daughter from Long Beach, guy from Long Beach, Marine girl from San Clemente

The Marias were so good, I highly recommend them.

They played “Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High” by the Arctic Monkeys and I loved it

about-face ads, free shipping! With purchase of $50 or more 

Chapter 1: The Capture 

Love the intro like from the IICHLIWP trailer

THE TRADITION 

CASTLE! Mic flip!

Halsey asking if we know what to do when the chorus drops and me shouting OH YEAH!! 

Halsey saying to STOP THAT TRACK

She doesn’t usually like to pit cities against each other (random guy shouting, WHAT IRVINE??)

Show is almost 2 hours long, baby, gonna need a lot of energy! She can see everyone all over 

My OMG realizing she’s restarting Castle 

EASIER THAN LYING HIGH ENERGY 

you should be sad is the best country song ever, we all stomped our feet! 

Firework shower with the Yeah-Yeah-YeahYeah Yeah 

I loooove the rock demo version of 1121 and of course the Die For Me track-I SOLD 15 MILLION RECORDS FOR A BREAKUP NOTE 

CHAPTER 2: RELEASE

The intro for Graveyard from the LA show with the Euphoria vibes 

“I really like you guys. You’re a cool ass f*cking crowd, I really f’ing love you guys. Wanna sing along with me going forward? 

COLORS!! The Badlands feels are so real 

How are you guys feeling right now? 

Absolutely never ever stops to blow my f’ing mind that I get to perform on stage and perform in front of a crowd that looks like this!

First show she ever played around these parts, Observatory? Asked Sheperd 

Played for 100 people (might be generous) 

Lighting power run through the kitchen, no fries that night 

Don’t wanna spend too much time talking, last night of tour little emotional (aww) 

How many people is this your first time seeing me in concert? How many have seen me before? 

Oh My Good Goooood? Loudest response for this tour of that question

Can tell you been rocking with me from the beginning 

Whether here for beginning, or 5 min before walked in building

Really grateful to have you here

Make sure tonight is the best concert you’ve ever seen in your f’ing life 

Hurricane with the Room 93 visuals ahhh 

LILITH!! My favorite! I shouted YES because it wasn’t on the setlist the night before and I was too happy to see it! I’m all “AW YEAH” during the beginning before I sing along. I also love the visuals with the Titane vibes

I heard the Lighthouse Siren and was sooo hyped, them O’Jays Ship Ahoy vibes at this concert had me emotional. 

“This Woman Will Not Go Quietly” line from the film 

One of my favorites, the rock Banshee vibes, beautiful visuals, I’m so in love 

killing boys - The whole crowd shouting “I’mma Uma Thurman your ass” was poetic

“You’re gonna hear the weird sh*t before you get the hits because that’s my style, but you begged for this so you better f’ing sing!” 

GIRL IS A GUN!!! 

YES!

TALK 2 (Chapter 3: Reflect) 

Be Kind drawing time!! 

Done paintings every single time something different

Those close in her life, do you plan? I mean, come on

No, Absolutely Not 

Do you plan what you’re gonna say? Set list before you get there? Same. 

This tour has been a lesson for me in embracing surrendering control (mild cheer for that—I did for the song Control) 

Used to get on stage wanting so badly it all to be perfect

Looks back on pics of sparkly costumes doing choreography and goes who tf is that? 

You guys know that feeling? It’s not just a musician thing. You see pics of yourself when you were younger you’re like who tf is that?

Kinda the same thing, 50 million pictures like that on Google

Ask at the beginning of show, what matters more to the story, is it good or is it true? 

Look at self in pictures, true to herself then, being true 

Some songs that she’s written doesn’t relate to same way? Does that make them untrue? Words not me anymore even tho they were at some point…little bit of a mindf*ck. Idk, kinda crazy

Most true version of myself is up here with a pen in my hand, canvas in front of me, and like 20,000 people that I love with my f’ing heart (I screamed WE LOVE YOU) 

When I look back in a couple years, won’t think omg who tf is that, will think wow, I was so lucky to be that person once in my life, so thank you. 

Songs about difficult times, used to be very sad alll the time. Still pretty sad all the time but wanna say if you’re here and share that same mentality, look back at version of you that related to sad songs and not that person anymore, sing your heart out tonight. Get it all out. When you leave, don’t take that old person with you, you’re not that b*tch anymore. You gotta exercise the demons and leave them on the floor 

This song is called 100 Letter 

100 Letters, everyone had their phones up with lights

TALK 3 (Pre 929)

In the spirit of the show of not letting things being perfect. 

Like the worst ever sang, on the verge of tears the entire time. 

imma gonna fight this I’m not gonna f’ing cry, I’m gonna do it! 

I did not do it. I failed. Miserably haha 

G-damn not even halfway through the set and I’m already crying 

“Where the f you at?” I coughed. 

HALSEY CHANT

Are you trying to make you make me cry? Are you guys playing a game with me? This is some sick f’ing twisted sh*t you’re doing. And you guys trying to make me cry more this is some sick sh

Believe me sang song 100 times it doesn’t make me cry anymore 

About to cry because knew what song comes after it, haven’t played it in years 

Probably most important song written for self in entire life.Really wanted to perform it in front of you guys tonight 

Dad to finally call me, he did (AWW) 

I wasn’t in love them (but I sure as F am now!!!) 

Done being sad, no more being sad long night ahead of us, TIME TO BE GAY

HONEY 

Me: HONEYYYY 

Went into 3AM

ME: YESSS

She’s laughing during it so cute!!

Fireworks and playing with guitarist

Talked about how fast song is and you don’t need to know the words 

TALK 4 (Thankful to fans, curfew) 

I know for a fact people on my team backstage rn like, “She good?” 

Are you OK? Did somebody slip you something before the show? WTF is going on?

Soaking up every second possibly can because this is the last night and love what I do so f’ing much

I hope from bottom of night you can see it all over my face how much I love being up here and being with you

Why get out here and do a show 2 horus long

Other do hour, get on stage, F off and leave

Wanna be here every f’ing second until the cops come up and yank me off stage for breaking curfew

F’ing love what I do!

Thank you for letting me do it love you guys so f’ing much! 

STOMPING FEET

So Good - like a couple weeks new don’t get too excited. 

“I love getting to play this song when he’s standing back there” LOVE TO ALEV

BAD AT LOVE - YES 

HOLD ME DOWN 

SHE DID THE SPLITS 

TALK 4 (BAND/Ring Announcer)

Most incredible musicians and people and friends 

So lucky all agreed to come on the road with me

Could’ve been doing something much cooler, I promise haha 

Usually make fun of them during this part 

Drums - next season of Bachelorette

Keys - Terrified of goldfish 

Make something up and embarass them

Too heartfelt, need you guys to be so loud for me 

DRUMS: Harry (will you guys please give it up for Harry!) 

GUITAR: Liv 

Don’t f’ing look at me I’ll cry 

KEYS Bonnie 

Halsey says she’s calling them out like a ring announcer

AND OVER HERE CHECKING IN AT 245 POUNDS HE IS TOUGH (I audibly said omGGG LITERALLY MY BRAND WITH MY WRESTLING LOVING SELF I lost it here) HE HAILS FROM IRVINE CA

YESS WHOOO

That’s my impression…this is why everyone on my team is gonna say somebody drugged me

Last show with tme as well, grateful to have support on road 

Part do 2 more songs, prepare to leave, comeback and do encore 

HALSEY CHANT 

For what? What did I do? I didn’t even do anthing

WHISPERS

GO BACK AND F HIM 

GASOLINE! FIRE (I love hearing my name in it) 

Chapter 4: Reflect

Flashing lights and rock music

Jumps up with flames and PYRO

NIGHTMARE 

Statistics for Abortion (my camera shut off for it ofc but it was PHENOMENAL) 

TALK 5 (Abortion Rights/Political)

Put in show 5 weeks before Supreme Court decision and statistics were much different then

We’re here in our little island 

Second to say as long as I have a microphone and stage if your well being livelihood and happiness at stake I will always f’ing be political 

In case you couldn’t tell, so many people in the crowd I recognize I’ve met so many times, who stories I know, parents I know, journeys through school work and life that I know, break f’ing heart if something going on in this world cause you bodily harm to get care you need and I did nothing about it

If politics aren’t your thing all good, 

Just learned a valuable lesson don’t come to a Halsey concert then.

Little bit of time

CHANT

MY BODY - Audience: MY CHOICE 

“THANK YOU!”

Music is political. Everything is political. Brave to leave house come here exactly as you are. Clothes you were. Words you sing. People you love. Things you do. Everything is f’ing political 

Running up that hill with the flame bar

WITHOUT ME 

Went into audience, guy had sign said his BF broke his heart, Halsey said “F HIM” to flip off hurtful ex

Confetti!! 

Acapella, 

“Put you up there, I don’t know why” - audience

I Am Not A Woman I’m a God 

Irvine. Thank you guys so much for an incredible night. So glad I got to close out this tour with you. This will be my last tour here for a really long time playing shows here in the states so I really love you and I really appreciate you for a great night. Did you have fun? Get home safe. I love you!

Y’aburnee playing on way out 

Shareable Review 

[orchidyoonkook]

Cursing myself 🤬for not having read TWWWBAATTA before😭, I love the details and your writing so much❤️❤️❤️❤️ There are so many details about the characters that hook me into the plot in a way that you have no idea about, I love it when things aren't written in a rush because it gives me time to develop feelings for the characters and RARELY do I see things written like that🧍‍♀️, but I even understand which takes a lot of work to develop and not all people are patient, but for me the more information and details the more immersed I am in the universe I'm reading, I think about the possible continuations of the new chapters I'm excited and patiently waiting for a new chapter😛😛😛 and please, if you can, continue to bring more details to the story, it's so good to read content like this🙏🙏, I really love it, I love YN's concern about her relationship, and about JK, who, as much as he wanted her, he maintains respect for her and her relationship I found the feeling very real🥺 But for now I'm going to eagerly await a new chapter, until then I hope you're doing well, staying healthy💜💜💜💜💜

yo I was so mad when she found out about JK through social media she acted the same way I usually act in real life which is to stay quiet and avoid contact with the person when I'm upset that was sooo personal 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Omg babe??!??!!? You wrote a novel just for me??? I'm stunned. shocked. absolutely splendidly thrilled!! Lemme dig in!!!!:

Cursing myself 🤬for not having read TWWWBAATTA before😭, I love the details and your writing so much❤️❤️❤️❤️

damn the cry corners getting a lot of attention this week cuz 😭😭😭😭😭 THANK YOUUUUUU <<<<<33333333

But you dont have to curse yourself!! I'm just honoured you read it in the first place!!

There are so many details about the characters that hook me into the plot in a way that you have no idea about, I love it when things aren't written in a rush because it gives me time to develop feelings for the characters and RARELY do I see things written like that🧍‍♀️,

ME TOO. I'm such a glutton for details. Gimmie all the details. Every necessary and unnecessary one. I like being able to take my time with the story and write it out exactly how I see it playing out in my head. I'm very much a kill your darlings writer, but only when it's truly necessary, otherwise, keep in the small things and the big things, the make the chatacters more real to the readers!

but I even understand which takes a lot of work to develop and not all people are patient, but for me the more information and details the more immersed I am in the universe I'm reading, I think about the possible continuations of the new chapters I'm excited and patiently waiting for a new chapter😛😛😛

It does take a lot of work. I gotta really picture the scenes in my head like theyre actually happening to get the level of detail I do. Without that visualization I wouldn't be able to write nearly as much.

Thank you for waiting!

and please, if you can, continue to bring more details to the story, it's so good to read content like this🙏🙏, I really love it, I love YN's concern about her relationship, and about JK, who, as much as he wanted her, he maintains respect for her and her relationship I found the feeling very real🥺

I will try my best! I have a bunch already written, I'm just editing now!

I'm so so happy to hear you love it!! Real is what I strive for, so the fact that it feels that way for you makes my writer heart sing so loud!! Thank you for that validation.

I love the respect they have for one another so much. It's something so new for both of them and so neither of them want to mess it up.

But for now I'm going to eagerly await a new chapter, until then I hope you're doing well, staying healthy💜💜💜💜💜

I'm trying my best to get it out!!! I work on it a little bit every day so I can get it out sooner rather than later!

Thank you for the well wishes, I'm as healthy as I can be and I think I'm doing alright!

yo I was so mad when she found out about JK through social media she acted the same way I usually act in real life which is to stay quiet and avoid contact with the person when I'm upset that was sooo personal 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Me too!!! I find it best to let myself think through my anger before I open my mouth, and I guess a little of that slipped into Reader. But I'm glad you were able to see a part of yourself in her too!

Thank you so much for all of your kind words, they made my day!

[comfyspookyburrito]

Blog update End of September 2023

Hey everyone and maybe even newcomers to my tumblr blog!

Usually every few months I post a status update of anything and everything I've been doing as time goes by the time that we cannot control.

Let me start off by saying that as of writing this, I'm tired so I won't have much energy and need to sleep.

First, I will confess that I have been on a procrastination vacation. Things in real life right now have been affecting my mood to live stream and produce content efficiently, however I have been very happy this whole time. I am starting to finally work more, i had too much free time on my hands and spent all of them playing genshin impact and other new games that have recently come out.

I am sorry in advance for not posting any new content, sharing my smash ultimate custom content, or even keeping everyone up to tabs on my hobby life. The truth is that I am lazy and wanted to spend more of my time relaxing and doing stupid things like neglecting my health and time to have fun playing video games.

Thing is, a long time ago I've been working nonstop on content and live streams, artwork, the usual.

While that made me extremely happy at the time, years later I finally went back on what I've missed out on.

Soon I will return with more health and self care, more content shortly will return, and I'll be back for real like I did for all these years.

There's two more things I want to address for this update life of mine.

A brand new 2D metroidvania platformer called Nyaruru Fishy Fight has popped up to me on steam. This game has a style similar to Rabi Ribi, rabi ribi is one of my favorite indie games of all time. So it has to be good!

This game is fantastic! Very fun, adorable, and I admit almost as perfect as rabi ribi!

Nyaruru is actually a sequel to a different game called Nyakori's Rabbit Doll.

In that game, you navigate and try to survive in a top down puzzle game like in those horror rpg games. The typical second game sequel that changes an entire genre.

If you enjoyed rabi ribi's story and slightly even remotely care about the story of nyaruru before playing either game, it would be a good idea to get both of them.

As for the whether you should play the first or second game, that's up to you. I played the second game first and only played the original game and it's dlc afterward. But both nyakori's dlc chapter, and nyaruru's story is sooo....good. So damn good I feel emotional about it.

I love nyaruru and want to play that game again a lot. And it's actually shorter than rabi ribi too!

The last thing for me to talk about is that I still plan to procrastinate until I have finished and completed a few things that are very important to me and will a strong impression of my channel themes and stance as a whole.

I have to finished a lot of animations I am sure many people will enjoy, afterward I might try to compose a theme song for them when I get tired of using different franchise video game songs, sonic, mario, ect.

Some new artwork thumbnails, a 4k youtube social media wallpaper banner, some additional artwork to push myself towards future content creation.

And another update to Crypt of the Literature Club Expanded and Enhanced steam workshop mod for crypt of the necrodancer! This update will include visual polish fixes to many sprites such as UI, statue's, player sprites, items, and more to a cute apealing artstyle. that update will also include the finished bestiary displays of the characters, and a classic style skin return from the original mod before it was removed.

And that's it! That's everything I wanted to talk about today. I might share another tumblr update blog around fall or winter. I always appreciate everyone who willingly stuck around! I care about all of my viewers and participants regardless.

TLDR; Sorry for slacking off the past few months, will return soon, go check out nyaruru's fishy fight, and lastly I've got more exciting content in store for you all when I return! Thank you for reading.

[tuffmallowinteractive]

Update!: Tackling TCD

And the art of facing the consequences of my scope creep

One of the things I think will be the death of me is my own creative mind.

When The Closet Door first started out, it really was only meant to be a 4 chapter free to play mini visual novel. I hoped to submit it to a game jam. When I realized I would probably miss the deadline, I decided to build on the story a little more.

Fast forward a year and a half later as I grind in between busy work schedules, postponing not one, but two commercial games in the wings, one of which, if it were a person, I'm sure it would pack its bags and leave. I'm hyper focused on finishing this game as a top priority- obsessively so. But I'm realising now that all the world building and incomplete assets have to be dealt with. And let me tell ya, it's a learning experience!

(CG snippets!)

I feel like I went crazy with CGs, but to be honest, I dont feel like there are enough. I had to stop though, because with me trying to finish the writing... (The writing would never get completed.) Just coloring in all these CGs, (several by the way have variations or are completely alternate depending on how the chapter branches) has proven to be a project all it's own! I refuse to even go there on expressions for sprites...

Being new to making visual novels, this will probably be the biggest lesson I learned.

Scope creep needs to be tamed!

BUT, does it mean I regret almost 40 CGs? Or the many many mini CGs I drew? Or 18+ sprites? Or outfit changes, overly plotted lore, way more chapters than my once humble four?

FOR THIS ONCE SIDE PROJECT?

Not at all.

If anything, I've learned not to try to squeeze into little deadlines that my big girl plans can't fit.

I'm sooo not a professional when it comes to game making. I'm just human. I write and draw and even plan like one. I'm always hoping this comes through in my work. And that if I just keeping dumping love into my work, that when I share it, that love will come pouring out UwU.

BUT WRITING THOUGH...

Sigh...

Honestly, and don't tell anyone...

I'm beginning to like how the writing is coming along.

I know! Shhhhh! Before somebody hears you!

I've completed Arun's route and edited it enough where I've begun pluggling it in Ren'py, and I feel good about it!

Octavius' route is in the editing phase, and then my boy Levi is all that's left holding us back! 👀💦

Also, all the endings are already written- so no worries there! In the end, I just have to finish all the things- the visual assets are all created, they just need coloring, and the writting just needs polish and editing. I guess I could say we're 80% there?

Just a little further! I can smell the finish line coffee!

~Alwaysjmb

[franeridart]

Anon said: I love your cartoon mice! You could make a series out of them!

I could!! I’d love to!!!!!! If you guys would be interested in me posting more of the original/cartoonish animals-and-still-life stuff I doodle I wouldn’t mind sharing at all!!!

@notanerd579​ said: hey! i’ve been a fan of yours for quite a while and i’ve had your post notifs on for some time. lately i noticed how quiet you’ve been so i looked up your page, and i somehow was no longer following you? i don’t know what happened, but i wanna make sure u know in case it’s happened to any of your other followers

Answering this publicly cause it seemed like you wanted me to, thank you so much! Both for following me again and for being worried it might have happened to someone else!! I hope not ;;;; 

Anon said: your iidayama fusion... love him so much

Ohhhhhhhhhhh I’m glad, I loved that one concept probably the most out of every other one!

Anon said: Ahhh i love your art style so much!!!! Thank for all the good Kiribaku stuff my dude!!!❤❤

No anon thank you!!!!! 💕💕💕

Anon said: So, I’m just wondering what makes u ship Seromina? My friend only said that their shipped because there the only last two in the Bakusquad, ( Kiribaku, Kamijirou )

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH oh, okay! Actually I have no clue if that’s why other people ship them? It might be? It might also be that them being the last two out of the group made people consider the ship and then start actually enjoy the possibility of it? I don’t know! Personally SeroMina is one of the ships I’ve been shipping the longest (I’ve been on it since before starting to like kamijirou, actually!) and one of the only three ships in bnha I have a seriously hard time breaking up and shipping around (the other two being ochadeku and bakushima) so I’m reasonably sure my ending up liking them was an independent thought process and it wasn’t guided by shipping other things? But it’s been so long that I can’t really say why I first considered them as a possibility, so who knows, really! Might be, might not!

The reason why I’m still shipping it right now is that I find them highly compatible, that their interactions in canon give me life, and that I just find them extremely visually pleasing - I think I have a very specific way of shipping them? In my head? I have this story about them, or... an ideal way in which I like to think they might happen, and it makes me very happy and makes me feel very warm and it’s just, it’s ideal? To me, the possibility of Sero and Ashido ending up together would make for an ideal lovestory and relationship, it just gives me the fuzzies haha it’s like, you know, they’re very very good friends, and to me that’s the most solid base to start a relationship, and they’re comfortable with one another which is wonderful. They’re the same type of silly and extra and rowdy which is fun, and I’m very very stuck on the fact that when Ashido was talking about her future agency she just assumed Sero would be in it - she wants him in her future??? how cute is that!! he wasn’t the only one she mentioned so I’m not saying it’s “canon proof” or whatever, I just like that out of the squad the only one she assumed would be with her in the future is Sero, it’s soft I like it. And I like how she’s by canon called bright and shining and eyecatching and Sero’s by canon called plain, I like the possibilities in that, the feelings in that, but especially I like the idea of bright shining wonderful Ashido with her love for everything romantic and always in search of her own shining love story one day looking at Sero and realizing that she doesn’t want anyone else!! because he makes her laugh! he makes her happy! he makes her feel like she’s perfect the way she is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! with her loud laugh and childish sense of humor and overly-bright fashion sense, and I love love love the idea of Sero thinking her completely out of his league and never thinking anything could ever happen between them but like, not in a sad pining sort of way? more in a “she’s ideal and I know she’s out of my league so I’m not putting any thought in it but she ideal”, only for Ashido!!! to confess!!!!!!! To HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just thinking about it makes me feel all warm inside I’m talking too much okay I know I just love them So Much Hori please don’t pair them off with someone else I’ll cry a river

Anon said: Have you seen the newest BNHA chapter??

THIS WAS ABOUT THE KAMIJIROU ONE HELL YEAH I READ THE KAMIJIROU CHAPTER HOLY H E C K

Anon said: Kiribaku, am I right?

you’re So Right, anon

Anon said: first off, i LIVE for your art, it always makes me so happy to see the boys!! also i am impressed with the way you made sero's elbows look anatomically correct he is a Good boy but man is he hard to draw and u did that

THANK YOU!!!! I actually spent a whole lot of time trying to figure out a way to draw his elbows that made sense to me and most times I still struggle with it a lot but I’m super happy to hear the way I go about it makes sense to you!!

Anon said: I was just wondering if you were still into Haikyuu?

Hell yeah! Both following the new anime season and still following the manga!

Anon said: Blue, grey, cinnamon, periwinkle, mauve, blush, indigo, fuchsia, lavender, saffron, plum, sage, viridian, burgundy. Colors taken from mk-58

...............................anon I’m sorry I have no clue what this is about orz

Anon said: Hey there! I love your art so much! Would you ever consider drawing Genos from One Punch Man? He’s my friend’s favorite character and she would totally love it. If not, that’s ok whatever you’re comfortable with :)

Ahhhh I’m sorry anon but I don’t really make a habit of drawing OPM stuff ): I’m glad you like my style, though! Thank you!!

Anon said: IS THIS WHERE YOU'VE BEEN HIDING MY DEAR~?? I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR YOOOOOOOOU~~~~~~~

I also don’t know what THIS is about!!!! is this a song I’m supposed to know because I feel like it is but it’s been weeks and my brain just isn’t cooperating!!!

Anon said: Not a question but I NEED you to know that your bokuroteru tattoo au comic gave me the biggest motivation to start writing again (albeit for bnha, instead of haikyuu) because it's just sooo good!! Their interaction, the way bokuro seem confident and comfortable even tho they're actually lame dorks who blush a lot, the way teru confessed to the two guys, their kisses //// just gahhh everything about your comic gave me the dokis. You're an inspiration

I’m so so so happy to hear that oh my god!!! (TTATT) the fact that that comic can still make people feel stuff means so much to me holy heck I’m gonna cry ;;;;;;;;;;;;;; 💕💕💕💕💕💕

Anon said: CAN WE HAVE MORE AKANE?? PLEASE I LOVE THAT CHILD TO DEATH!!!! I'm new to the blog so Idk if this would be a request but...I just really want some Akane...

I do wanna draw more of her!!!!!!!!! I just don’t have any ideas at all!!!!!!! I hope inspo will come back to me soon ;; meanwhile thank you so much for being interested in my little rude bean TT^TT

Anon said:  !!! i just scrolled through my dash and saw some icon set post that had a a character i didn't recognize, but the image in the middle was familiar, and i realized it was your art ;; so i 1) was proud of myself for recognizing your style immediately and 2) asked op to take the post down since there was no credit and the image was edited. hope you have a lovely day! i got your back 💞

Thank you so much for looking out for me, anon!!!!!! 💕💕💕💕 you’re the best and I appreciate you A LOT

Anon said: OH MY GOD YOU DREW GALO AND LIO I JUST WATCHED PROMARE TODAY AND I THOUGHT "THEY LOOK FAMILIAR"

I have so many more ideas for those two!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m not sure WHY I’m not drawing more, honestly!!!!! my hands lately haven’t been very cooperative orz

Anon said: Ok so Idk if I lowkey offended u with my last ask so IM SO SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME IT WAS A JOKE

NOT OFFENDED SORRY FOR THE WAY I WORDED THE ANSWER seriously I’m really sorry I was just kind of already beating myself up over the fact that I haven’t been posting enough so the answer ended up sounding like that because in my brain I was like yeah fran where IS the stuff!!!!! so, yeah. It was more on me than on you, I’m really sorry for that ;;

[modern-oedipus]

Conflict post that got too long and title doesn’t match the rest because I didn’t plan to write so much

Please be honest: Do you think Conflict is an angsty fanfiction?

Despite the amount of sadness, suicidal tendencies, ptsd, panic attacks and even implied incest; I can’t bring to think that Conflict is angst. It’s just the story of two flawed boys falling in love in their most vulnerable moments and learning how to know themselves as they get to know each other.

It might be because I know the whole story, though, unlike the readers who know the first arc only. I mean... it’s perfectly fine however you interprwt their story. It’s not like I’m mad. I’m just surprised when I see things like “this is so sad!” I mean, yes, Ray is not going through best time of his life, but I think it is honorable. It’s honorable that he is trying his best, despite the depression blowing his mind. It’s honorable that Norman is trying to be a little honest with himself despite the chaos he is living in. It’s honorable that Emma sticks with Ray through thick and thin. It’s just characters trying their best, I don’t think it should be needlessly tagged as “angst” because I don’t think I write them that way for the sole reason of sadness. Rather, there is something I want to tell— something I want all of my readers to see.

But I can’t blame anyone since I haven’t written 3/4 of the fanfic yet. I haven’t shown you even a bit of the path I’ve already decided and mentally written for Conflict. I actually wanted to write Conflict tonight, but due to personal reasons I’m not feeling my best and despite my efforts to write Shotgun, I couldn’t write shit, and it won’t be good for my mental health to be in fiction today. Today I need my science and my facts (I say today but it’s 2.40 am and maybe I should sleep).

So, basically, I want to just SHOW by writing instead of giving leaks and stuff, but...

But...

You have no idea how much braining it takes to write Conflict.

Sure, I’m not a professional writer and there may be many better, smarter stories out there, but to me, personally, I put my best into Conflict. I give it all I have. I give it all my experience and everything I’ve learned until age of 21. It is a very condensed, artistic way of me talking about my life and experiences and observations throughout a fictional universe where it is not directly my life, but a world I try to represent in balance. So— to me, ever since I started writing first chapter I treated Conflict like my first book, I mean, sure it is a fanfiction but I thought “I’d give it a try as a hobby and if it goes well— if i can stick to it determined and if I get nice feedback and if people like it, this will give me strength to write a real book!” and BOY I got SOOO MUCH MORE THAN I’D EVER EXPECT, I even got FANARTS and people messaging me or commenting how much they personally relate or how much the fic helped them to go through bad days or how much they’ve seen themselves in Ray or Norman’s situations, and when I read those messages I can’t help but think all of you deserve to see the way Conflict builds up. You deserve to see how many times Ray and Norman are challenged, by themselves, by each other, and by society, and you deserve to see how they respond to them, and you deserve to see how much and how little of a difference it can make to have two people really love each other. Anyway, I went off topic, I was saying that, to me Conflict is a story I’m giving all I have got as the person I am today.

Other fanfictions of mine are moreee easy to write because they don’t have sovmuch in depth characters or complex plots and they are just that, fanfictions, in which I write a ship. But Conflict, man, I treat it like my real novel— which is technically one to me, though a non-profit one dedicated to the manga that really challenged me, and I have no regrets writing it or making it a fanfic. Anyway! Thing is, given the fact that Conflict is heavy, content and chapter length wise, I can’t always get to write it. I could, if this was summer, but this is collehe time and even though I really want to get going, sometimes I need to save Conflict for another time when I’m more available. Me publishing easy to write things like Shotgun doesn’t mean I’m available for conflict. The mental energy they take is A LOT different.

But it’s not in a bad-different way! I love both my fics! I have no regret over time and dedication I have for Conflict! I just, don’t have the time for it all the time, which can’t be helped.

It’s 2.49 am now. I really want to write conflict. First draft of chapter 16 was written two months ago. The scene is completed as a draft. But that scene includes a terrible pstd & panic attack about Ray and I just... /sighs/ don’t really wanna get in mood for something so gloomy? I wanna write more cute stuff like their awkward date on Shotgun... but I really want to keep Conflict going. I guess I’m terrified that given how fragile my mental health is right now, the content of Conflict might make it worse. I’d still proud to have finished a chapter. But thinking about writing about Leslie’s loss and its effects on Ray makes me shiver, because that’s a topic I’m sensitive of and although I almost never get affected emotionally from the ficsbI write (for example, I dont cry writing sad smiles neither do I smile a lot at soft scenes, I’m usually neutral and I simply enjoy act of writing itself) but the 1% chance that Conflict’s content might fuck with my mental health.. as if one last trigger before a breakdown, makes me want to stay a few steps back from Conflict and just breathe.

But I also somehow feel like I’m really available to write Conflict. I don’t know. Why do I care so much about Conflict, you may ask, since it’s just a fanfiction.

I think that’s because Conflict is the first real thing I’ve done (along with many other achievements that exactly started on the same day, July 1) after I got out of depression. It proves me that I can create something— get it visualized— and having people respond to it makes me feel connected to world. Remember the scene I wrote about Ray’s detachment to Emma’s calls? I’ve never gotten physically unresponsive like that, but there were times depression made me detached and to me that’s the scariest part... feeling detached. I feel as if I don’t post a fic for too long (assuming I’m in mood to write), or if I don’t go out/go to school/go to gym for too long, if I don’t meet up my friends or reply back to my texts for too long, I may get detached. If I get detached, I’ll think of dark, terrible stuff. If I don’t return world easily, it may easily slide into a depressed day. Or two days. Before I get back. And those one or two days are scariest because I’ve lived a YEAR worth of them, continiously, and god forbid me or anyone experiencing that. It was terroble.

So when I don’t write even when I want to, I feel as if I might get depressed. Not emotionally. But rationally— be being unable to do things I want to do EVEN WHEN I HAVE TIME AND SOURCES AVAILABLE FOR THEM would build depression up. I sm not saying right sway. Anyway. That’s why I care about Conflict. That’s why I’m staying dedicated. Dedication prevents detachment. When I’m not detached, and thankfully having readers interacting to me, I feel— or prove— that my work is reaching someone. I exist. My ideas mean something. Even if it’s just fan base, ie friends— I consider y’all friends— I mean, we are still kids, right? Most of us are 16-25 and that ain’t even real adult to me, we are just friends befriending each ofher oe so I believe, so like, even if its just with friends it means a thing. It prevents detachment. When I’m not detached I’m motivated. When I’m motivated I want to live. When I want to live I go out and do things. When I go out and do things I get motivated again. When I’m motivated again I write again. When I write I’m not detached. The cycle continues, see? Of coursw, writing is just ONE way to prevent detachment. It itself can’t carry all burden. Same goes for me regularly going to classes, going to gym, meeting up or calling my friends, etc. I’ve learnt that the more places you put a bit of yourself in, less likely you are from detachment. And that’s good. Idk, that’s why comments are important to me. It’s too personal at this point but they really, really, really help me to stay in connect.

So I want to write, so I can be happy, and I can interact, and look at my published chapter, so I can be further motivated to do things tomorrow... but it’s now 3 am and, I, if I start now I won’t be done earlier than 4.30 am and it’ll be cold and I’ll be brain dead, so for my sake, it’s better if I sleep. Msybe studying a bit before sleep will prevent detachment as well. I usually don’t EVER get detached, I’m quite successful at holding myselfnon line, but that’s bc I am careful about triggers. So... not starting conflict will be the best decision.

I don’t know how much time I’ll have in sunday but I hope it will be enough for a chapter update.

If you’ve read so far, thank you, this post went out of hand— but I can comfortably talk about it now because I’m over it, and I’m trying to rationalize the fact that me consistently updating really makes me happy and excited and having fun instead of feeling detached and it’s important and I just love my story and I hope you all feel content and satisfied when you read Conflict’s final.