#sorry I’m a bit insane I love this unironically

[the-moth-from-elsewhere]

The Epic Amazing Absolutely Insane TAOCC Song Post

Aka: Elsie assigns random songs to random characters for random reasons, vaguely organized by mod. These are almost entirely vibes and randomness so get ready to be utterly confused. Don’t expect any of these to fit too well, I went more based on the sound and random stuff than the actual accuracy. Also i’m kinda brain-broken from overthinking all this music lol. No, I didn’t add links, just because this took so many hours. Maybe tomorrow, I just wanna get this done.

Feiar’s characters.

Nymn

“Dento takes the Stairs” by Gooseworx

I told you these would make no sense. Idk the amount of nymn just being vibes/silly/lighthearted makes me think of how this song is a break from the chaos of the Elain series.

Jessy

“Metamodernity” by Vansire

Okay, I have a really specific animatic in my head for this song in which we flash between the TAOCC characters as they are in the circus, and then a cool transition, and then it’s them pre-circus. My best example is Dusk and Jessy sitting on a bench. A train passes by, and now it’s human Jessy sitting alone on a bench. Because Dusk is AI. And that very specific part of the animatic in my head tends to stick with me, especially seeing as Jessy is very “just go with stuff” and so I can kinda hear him singing this in my head.

”Apocalypse Now” by PinnoccioP

The first appearance of many of my favorite music artist lol. The song is about enjoying existence even if everything is a violent wreck, and it just kinda fits to me lol.

“World’s Smallest Violin” - AJR

yeah just gonna drop this one here and run

“Sweet Tooth” - Scott Helman

Blame Fei.

Clara

”Drosselmeyer’s theme - Kurumi Wari Ningyo (Nutcracker No. 2 March) - The Princess Tutu Soundtrack

Okay, for starters, you should watch Princess Tutu. Like right now. It’s amazing, and the title does NOT do it Justice. Back on track, it…it’s the nutcracker! Come on, this one was basically handed to me.

Tutu vs Kraehe (Swan Lake Act 1 Op. 20 No. 2)

Fight theme.

Lance

”I Don’t Have a Name For It” - Steam Powered Giraffe

I…I’m sorry I don’t have an explanation for this it just works. Lancia sweep.

Raina

”Nightcall” - Kavinsky

…Once again, very flimsy. But like…switch the gender. I’m sorry but it’s giving “they’re talking about my death but I’m still here.” The miku version works better here in my opinion :3

The pirates

“He’s a pirate” - F-777

“The 7 Seas” - F-777

idk man techno piracy go vrrrrrrrr I unironically blasted these during like the entirety of the pirates plotline frick you this is my rant I do what I want /silly

Star’s Characters

Icia

”Long Live” - Taylor Swift

I swear I have reasons for this just hear me out okay- First off, I can see the voice fitting, second off, I imagine her singing this either for Lance or Starro or both after we finally finally finally throw Hexe off a cliff.

“Santa Salvacion” - Magia Record OST

epic fight theme for fighting the terrifying ice lady. I blasted this while writing the fight scene with The Dark Queen Icia.

Dunite

”Postmeridae” - Madoka Magica OST

Cutesy upbeat theme for making merengues to. No notes.

“Witches Dance” - Magia Record OST

Idk, feels like her fight theme

”Roki” - Mikito P

…Vibes. Entirely vibes. Dunite should start a band /hj.

Starro

“Please Never Fall In Love Again” - Ollie MN

I just…him. Singing this. About Conny. I swear to cheese.

Vaga and Nova

“Class Dance - Rensho Kyoku I” - Princess Tutu OST

…Vibes.

Odette

”Vocalise Op. 34 No. 14” - Madoka Magica OST

Vibes. Piano. Sad string accompaniment. Must I say more?

Achilles

“Doubt #2” - Madoka Magica: Rebellion OST

Starting to notice a pattern with the kingdom characters lol?

Joofie’s Characters

Cardlan

“Main Character” - Will Wood

Ego. So, so much Ego.

“Sayo-Nara” - DDLC OST

I have my reasons.

Minimi

“Not Yet (Epilogue)” - Madoka Magica: Rebellion OST

Accordion and a little bit of ominousness. Vibes.

Xeyshattersiltav1a’s Characters

Sun

“Cowboy Dan” - Modest Mouse

Yee-haw sun. Do not give that woman a truck. Wow, these descriptions are getting terrible lol.

”Popular” - Wicked Soundtrack

Wicked but it’s sun and Dusk lives in my head rent free okay

“Alright” - Mother Mother

please help me I keep making up sun animatics with this song in class

Mix

“Something, Everything is Wrong” - Madoka Magica: Rebellion OST

This song is the reason I associate Mix with the accordion. Also, I imagine Dusk meeting him/his first real introduction in TAOCC’s background music as this song.

“Intertwined” - CMYK, CircusP.

Rip this man’s love life

“Love is War” - Ryo/Supercell feat. Hatsune Miku

Love is still Vehicular Manslaughter /ref

Dialtone

“Cats!” - waterflame

Does the song fit him? Not at all! It is way too techy and upbeat, and would probably better suit someone like Switch. But like….cats. He’d listen to a song called “cats!”. You can’t convince me otherwise.

“Want You Gone” - The Portal OST

Dialtone is GLaDOS coded to me.

“Killer Spider” - PinnoccioP

vibes and vibes alone.

Soup’s Characters

Silhouette

“Scared of you” - Brandon Hesslau

“Whoops, sorry for kinda almost killing you.”

”What Gave It Away” - Riproducer

evil.

”Burial Ground” - Low Roar

sad backstory.mp3.

Clown

“I’m Number One” - Muppets Most Wanted Soundtrack

Look man he’s silly and egotistical and it’s funny. He’s definitely singing this with carbine.

Autumn’s Characters

Pyxel

”Magical Doctor” - MARETU

once again, more vibes than lyrics and the gender’s wrong but, like, the vibes, man

Neb

“Lonely UFO” - PinnoccioP

…it doesn’t fit. The lyrics, as far as I can tell, do NOT fit. BUT LOOK AT THE OUTFIT, THE BLUE HAIR AND VOID SKIN AND MURDER TEETH AND TELL ME THAT DOESN’T LOOK LIKE NEB, OKAY?!

“Finding Sanctuary” - Stellaris OST

Silly space song for silly space person.

Lily’s Characters

The bookend siblings, and I mean all of them as a group, Katrina included for brevity’s sake

“Magical Girl and Chocolate” - PinnoccioP

Okay, I have actual reasoning for this one. Each of the siblings is someone’s “magical girl”, whether metaphorically or literally. They’re each fighting to protect and support someone. And they each strain and struggle to cope with a role too demanding for them. This song works for each of them in a different form and context.

Octavia and Steven/Sign

“Isn’t it “A”” - PinnoccioP

The arguments of all time

Honse- I mean Sophro

“Puzzle” - CMYK, CircusP

He’s just here to help. No notes.

Miscellaneous Others/Not big enough for their own section

Lantern

“Lantern” - Undertale OST

…self explanatory. The song’s vibes fit, too, I imagine this plays in his scenes.

“The Other One Left” - VaneLily

Half due to the “I just want a loving father” line. Gender’s wrong, again, but otherwise the lyrics fit.

Seer

“Seer’s Theme” - Cindy

I literally cannot outdo her own theme. It’s just too good. I listen to it randomly just because I like it so much /gen.

Sigil

“I’m Just Ken” - Barbie Movie Soundtrack

this is mostly a joke but come ON you think that guy doesn’t feel a little overshadowed by his GODDESS FIANCÉE?!

“Business Man” - Tom Cardy

Okay so this one takes some explaining because I imagine sigil walking into Dialtone’s place to spy and Insanity ruining everything and shooting everyone. It makes absolutely no sense but it’s funny in my head so here we are.

My Characters, yes this is gonna be last

Dusk

“Ultimate Senpai” - PinocchioP

A song about being overly pressured and stuff? Yeaaaaah.

“Sis Puella Magia!” - Madoka Magica Soundtrack

….Pretty. That’s it.

Aoki

“Decretum” - Madoka Magica Soundtrack

The reason I gave him a violin.

Alpenglow

“Yume Yume” - DECO*27

I have an ENTIRE ANIMATIC for chip and alpen with this song in my head

Lemonade

“Viva La Vida” - Coldplay

lore. Hehe.

Yume

“What are Children Made Of?” - PinnoccioP

This kid’s childhood has been ruined and boy is processing that hard.

”Everything about Animals” - PinocchioP

an absolute fever dream of a song that she would absolutely sing about animals. And how cool they are. And ohhhh look commentary on the state of humanity

Switchboard

“Kom Susser Tod” - Astrophysics

Idk it doesn’t fit all too well but the mix of utter hopelessness and eurobeat techno is just hercore

TAOCC as a whole

“Something Rotten!/Make an Omelette” - Something Rotten Soundtrack

WHEN I TELL YOU I HAVE AN ENTIRE. FREAKING. ANIMATIC-

”Your Silver Garden” - Madoka Magica OST

I do not know the lyrics literally at all but I could see an OP for TAOCC with this song

[decolonize-the-everything]

The White Hollowness, how I loathe it. I want to have culture that isn’t just American^tm

When the Italian hand meme came about for a bit I loved it bc I do that on a regular basis unironically 🤌 but great grandpa decided no no Italian when he got here so he didn’t teach the language to any of his kids so it was immediately lost. We still love our garlic, our pasta, mi mama says scuzi rather than excuse me. Traditions? Nope. History? Absolutely not.

My dad had frikken lederhosen growing up and yet again nothing was passed down from German heritage. Great grandpa + grandma came over and idk I guess they just stopped >:/

Try to engage with what should technically be part of my culture and just feel like such an outsider.

We more than likely have relatives out in the respective countries that we know nothing about and have no way of finding or connecting with them. We were essentially severed from our roots

Instead I’m stuck here with baseball, beer, hamburgers, guns, 4th of July, etc. like there’s a lot that is white American culture but it’s all like? Really superficial when you think about it if that makes sense?

This is getting long I’m sorry but I wanted to tell you I liked/appreciated your recent post about it. I didn’t think about how some of the experiences would be similar to some native people but it makes sense. It’s not the same by any means but like you said, there could be more similarities than one would think.

Colonization is just such a poison. It’s hurt and or destroyed any country it’s..well, colonized. It’s like an invasive species if that makes any sense to anyone but me. You put this where it shouldn’t be (not it’s natural habitat) and it proceeds to destroy the entire ecosystem

I hope you have a good night!

Felt. That's how the Mexican side of my family is too, just scraps of culture. I never even learned Spanish cuz nobody taught me. We got some food and a couple things to light a candle for and That's it. My grandma was a first gen immigrant. If I didn't already know that though, I wouldn't believe it because she's assimilated so much.

I'm old enough to have my own family now and it's insane how performative and hollow it feels to try celebrating things none of us are actually invested in or believe in. But if we don't celebrate Easter or Christmas... We have almost nothing. We were left with hardly anything.

So I definitely get the feeling of celebrations being really superficial.

I'm glad you liked the post ✌️

[foolishfern]

(same anon again hehehe, i’m just gonna keep asking about your gf because you like talking about her and it’s so cute !!)

questions incoming:

do you guys hang out a lot?

did you move fast into the relationship like stereotypical sapphics?

what was your most recent date like?

how was your first kiss?

do you both get along with each others families?

what things do you have in common?

(end of questions !!)

im sorry her and your friend don’t get along :( but at least you get along with her friends !! let’s hope you guys can meet up again !!

i hope im not being annoying by asking these *_*

you’re absolutely not being annoying this kind of stuff is like crack to me <3

We don’t really get a lot of time to hang out, she works a 9-5 and I work nights and weekends at a bar, but she comes to see me at work at least once a week, and we try and plan dates as often as possible. We’re actually going on a trip next week.

We did not move fast. We were the anti stereotype. She wasn’t out at the time, so I was in a awkward limbo of not wanting to make it serious until she was comfortable. We started dating in March 2023 and didn’t ‘officially’ get together until august 2023.

Our most recent proper date (aside from hanging out) was to see the Garfield movie because I love him and she loves the cinema (she cried over garfs dad) and afterwards we fed the birds in town and people watched 10/10 date

Our first kiss was Bad. We were on a night out and I was trying to find the courage to do it all night but I was too nervous. My boss (and family friend) had given us a lift home and interrupted my first attempt as he pulled up, and then we accidentally kissed right in front of him when I was going in to kiss her cheek. bad and awkward.

I have a huge family (6 siblings) and she’s a bit socially anxious, so she doesn’t know them very well. She tolerates my folks fine, but she gets along with my younger sister TOO well and it makes me afraid because they’re insane together. Her family are all so lovely, and knew we were dating before she even came out, and they’ve been nothing but supportive.

This is hard one. When we were teenagers (before I knew her) we discovered that we had a lot in common, but now we’re total opposites in almost every sense. I’m a bit sarcastic and brash, I wear a lot of retro punk stuff and she’s super hyper and cute and her whole vibe is Pink and blue. We unironically get called the Goth house & Pink house meme. But, we both really like Dead boy detectives right now, we have similar tastes in music, we both really like crafty stuff, we have a really similar sense of humour. I know there’s more but it’s very niche things. I kind of like that we’re so different, because it’s refreshing to discover new things that I wouldn’t necessarily seek out myself. She makes me step away from my comfort zone.

Also, I know you’re anon for a reason, but do you have any preferred pronouns ?? Or a throwaway name?? I don’t wanna keep calling you anon in my head.

[gridadimorte]

random Sinclair brother head canons bc this movie is all I have thought about for months and I need to put these out there’s so ppl can agree w me bc I’m right:

-Lester is a pro w spicy food, like he’s that one white guy that will outdo you as a bipoc on spice level and put you to shame.

-I just know he’d love Thai food 😔

-bo however…

-bo thinks he has same taste buds as Lester, or at least he convinced himself that he does

-everyone at the table will warn him about ordering the hottest spice level even the waiter will warn him against it but Bo’s a fucking show off and he’s gonna suffer the consequences

-this man cannot do spice, I’m talking a lvl two has him sweating.

-one bite out of anything lvl 4 or higher and his head is in his damn hands.

- Lester has definitely tried to get bo to do those hot chip and noodle challenges and it’s def ended w bo dry heaving on the floor or threatening Lester through chugs of milk

- imagine taking these mfs to a Starbucks drive thru, lester is in the passenger seat, already knows what he wants, a pink drink w light ice ✨ or a dragon fruit lemonade

-Vincent is an artist so it’s only natural that he’s gonna go w a matcha drink, def an iced matcha latte but if he wants smth else I see him drinking chai lattes

-don’t get me started on Bo 🙄 it’s not gay to have caramel in ur coffee, like he’s not bisexual

- is gonna talk about how he ONLY drinks his coffee black, a barista’s worst nightmare

-but if it’s hot he’s gonna pretend like he doesn’t want any of those “damn fruity little drinks” (please get him a refresher or lemonade)

- I feel like Lester would like old school reggaeton despite not speaking Spanish

- All artists have one female vocalist that they worship, Vincent’s is björk. Definitely has a vespertine vinyl that was stolen from a victim’s bag, he’s absolutely hoping to “find” a post vinyl to go with it.

-crediting my friend for this one but Lester would absolutely love Waffle House 😭 dinner and a show

- tbh I really don’t see bo listening to a lot of country if any, maybe some johnny cash and a little Reba but I feel like that’s pushing it. I think his taste in music mostly stays within the rock and metal genres 😔 probably has the smallest music range out of all three brothers, sorry y’all </3

-bo has a cd and cassette playlist that he only shows people he likes, def nabbed some rare merch and cds from victims and you’ll have to pry them from his cold dead hands to touch them

-yes ik we can assume he mostly like nu metal and 90s metal/rock from the HoW soundtrack but I feel like bo def likes Black Sabbath too

-bo let me put u on she wants revenge 😩

- no one talk to bo if smth goes wrong in the kitchen, just mind your business (he’s just like me FR)

- dude cracks an egg just to get eggshell bits stuck in there and as soon as Lester and Vincent hear him sigh 🏃🏼‍♂️🏃🏻‍♀️ they’re out the kitchen

- Vincent’s fave insects r praying mantises

-Lester has crazy grilling skills but is not allowed to cook for his brothers anymore bc they’ve been secretly fed raccoon meat too many damn times (2x)

- Vincent makes the best pancakes and bo makes the best French toast 😤

- while they have jonesy and she’s loved by all three I think bo has a secret soft spot for little dogs

- bring him a small dog and he’s gonna talk about how he “doesn’t want that rat” but he’s gonna be buying them little sweaters and a nice dog bed within a day. Will even have the dog in his own jacket when it’s cold.

-got help w my sibling for this one, but if they played any video games these would be their faves:

Bo: duke Nukem (unironically)and doom

Vincent: postal and bioshock, I think he’d also enjoy the game ver of I have no mouth and I must scream

Lester: Turok evolution, I wanna say he’s insanely good at fighting games, probably plays tekken 3 and 4, but he never memorizes any of the character’s names so if you ever ask him who plays it’s “oh uhh that one fella with the fucked up eye”

-Lester kazuya and or hwoarang main

- imagine twitch streamer Lester 😭

-(sorry to any old school gamers my first console experience was a ps2 and I’ve never played on anything older </3 but I’d love to see yalls thoughts on their fave games considering they grew up in the 70s-80s)

- I already know horror movies don’t do a damn thing to the twins but imagine them playing a survival horror game together 😭 like the first outlast or even worse silent hill, them being in such a vulnerable and open position would freak them tf out

- the sibling arguing you’d hear over the ominous music coming from the tv bc bo refuses to let go of the controller and Vincent is angrily pointing and signing at bo like “no damn it you went the wrong fucking way you were supposed to go through the other door”

-bo will absolutely scream once or twice, Vincent will flinch violently or start panicking and trying to snatch the controller away from bo

- if you make them play just dance we all know Lester is gonna win

- imagine these bitches playing wii, bo would smack his brothers w the Wii remote on purpose 🤦🏻‍♂️

-pronouns n sexualities:

-bo: cis he/him and bisexual but doesn’t talk about it, doesn’t stop him from hitting on everyone regardless of their gender tho

-Vincent: he/they or they/he I cannawt decide but also bisexual

-Lester: He/Him I’d say Lester is cishet but there’s def times where he opens his mouth and it’s like……r u sure

That’s all I have so far but catch me adding onto this post over time 😏

[bokettochild]

About Legend having insane leg strenght: what if the reason he never brags about that is because he's embarassed about it? He thinks that pulverizing a boulder with a kick is either something everyone can do or too similar to a bunny. One day he and Four get dumped into a monster camp without their items or weapons and Legend takes desperate measures to ensure they don't die: anihilating the entire camp with only his legs. He is unironically and literally capable of killing someone with his /1

This ask references this post btw, so, check it out if you need context!

Honestly, I loved this so much! THANK YOU!!! But I am half asleep, so the cool stuff I saw in my head is being stinky and not comng out. I'm sorry, hope you like my half-asleep drabbl of Legend being weak as shit while simultaneously having the strongest kick out of the whole Chain XD

Legend hates being at Ordon.

It’s not that he hates the people; he’s used to country folk, he was raised around them, heck, his grandparents have the same strong twang in their voices that everyone in Twi’s village does! He loves the fresh air and the sounds of animals and the sight of growing things everywhere he looks.

But he hates looking around and seeing Twilight’s entire village (even the freaking kids!) wander around lifting things that probably equal his entire body weight!

Seriously, Malo (that was the terrifying toddler’s name, right? That’s what Twilight said when he introduced them all, right?) could lift up a small goat with ease, and he was an actual toddler!

What was Uli feeding her children that they turned out this strong? Were all the village women using it? How on earth was every person in all of Ordon fully capable of throwing Legend over their shoulder?

It hadn’t happened yet, but Legend was on guard because it was only so much time before someone figured out it was possible, and it wasn’t as if he could fight them off.

He wasn’t jealous, definitely not. Not even when he saw Twilight carrying a mother goat across the village with an easy stride as he brought the nanny back to her pen. When he buried his face in his arms and sighed it wasn’t because he was remembering how much he had to tug and pull to move a basket of apples, no, it was just because the mere thought of carrying goats for the foreseeable future made him tired. Definitely.

But this strength was just an Ordon thing, right? It was totally just something that was common in Ordon, and Legend took comfort in that as he sat on the front porch of Uli and Rusl’s house and helped with the mending.

Even their blankets were heavy, what the heck?

But then Sky walked past.

And Sky was carrying a barrel, an entire barrel. One that swished and clunked with the sounds of grain filling it, and if the small trail of spilled seed that followed after the hero meant anything, then that thing was full.

Okay, so Skyloftians were strong too, no big deal.

Big deal.

Their entire visit to Ordon, helping to hide away animals and supplies before a local monster band stole them, was spent with Legend trying desperately to not be jealous as he watched everyone from Wind to Time lift and carry things that he couldn’t even knock over if he pushed against them.

It wasn’t even that most of thing things were heavy, it was just... he was weak.

Uli’s gaze when she’d figured out the truth had been surprised, eyes blown wide with shock as she watched as Legend, who’d opted to help indoors since he knew working outside would lead to him being more a burden than an aid, struggled to lift buckets of water to fill the wash basin. Dark brown eyes had followed him as he’s left the bucket outdoors and stomped inside, hissing and wheezing under his breath as he moved his attention to his bag and grabbed one of his power bracelets.

“Hun,” Uli’s soft country twang caught his attention as the woman drew close, concern filling her warm gaze. “Are ya’ feelin’ alright?”

And reputation or no, Legend’s Gran would have his hide on a hitching-post if he even so much as dropped his manners. There was something about country folk that was so inherently polite and welcoming, that even the salty vet couldn’t help but return with the same manners that his Gran had pounded into his head since childhood.

“Yes, ma’am.” Crimson trailed up his neck to blossom across his cheeks and shoot up his ears. He tried to ignore that Uli had a baby on one hip and a bushel of food on the other, breath contained and relaxes as she stood there, no hint of strain in her face or body language. His fingers trailed along the clasp of his power bracelet, shame building inside as he shuffled his feet.

You just can’t walk away when lady’s talking to you, especially if she’s being all polite like and just makin’ sure you’re okay.

“Are you injured?” The farm-wife pressed. “You were huffy something huge with that there bucket.”

And Legend would like nothing more than to sink into the earth as he glances over the full bucket of water that no matter how hard he tries, he just can’t lift. “I’m just not much of a farm-hand is all, ma’am. I’ll be right as rain in a tick, just needed to grab something I forgot.”

And while the look Uli gives him is a bright smile, he knows worry when he sees it peeking out of someone’s gaze. He tries to ignore that, instead turning back to the chores he’d been assigned and trying his hardest to ignore ethe fact that no one else was wearing power bracelets when they all came back for dinner that evening.

He’s not strong. So what? He can lift his sword well enough, and he can do most other things too when he wears the power bracelets.

Yes, he knows that Ravio warned him about not developing muscles if he relied on objects so much, but he’s never had time to work out or build any muscle mass, so when he needs it it’s a bit more important to just get his work done rather than hope he’ll develop it. He’s paying for that, and he knows it, but he can’t really help that he doesn’t have the time or space to really do anything about it.

Oh well, at least the others haven’t caught on.

Warriors hefts a huge rock over his shoulder and throws it, chuckling deep and loud as he smirks at the rancher. “Beat that!”

They’re clearing a road where an avalanche swept through and blocked off the main entrance to a local town. They’ve been at it for hours, and while Legend tries his hardest to be discreet by sticking to things he can actually lift, even if it does require his bracelets, the others have devolved into a contest to see who can throw stuff the furthest.

There’s nothing on the other side of the road except for the edge of a swamp, and even Legend has to admit that it’s ridiculously satisfying to hear each of the heavy stones go ‘plop’ as they land in the marsh.

Twilight smirks at the captain, all his sharp teeth on display as he hefts a rock that’s the size of Wild and easily bigger than half of the rest of the heroes. “Watch and learn, city boy.” Twilight grunts (well at least it took some effort) before throwing the boulder and watching with the rest of them as it soars through the air and lands with a dramatic ‘splosh’ in the middle of the swamp. Cheers erupt from the younger heroes, and a few even drop their own burdens to give a brief round of applause.

Warriors humphs shrewdly, gaze thin as he looks over at Twi, who only cocks a brow in challenge. “Anyone think they can beat that?”

Legend finds his gaze meeting Four’s swirling hazel, and they both quickly look away from the captain, both well aware that the biggest rocks they’ve lifted are maybe the sizes of their heads, and no where near the horrific loads that the taller heroes are tossing left and right.

“I’ll try!” Wild’s eyes are flashing as the kid clambers over the rock slide, eyes darting to and fro until they land on what has to be the biggest, most horrifically sized piece of rubble Legend has ever seen. The Champion beams, rolling his shoulders and cracking his knuckles briefly before taking the stone in both hands and lifting it over his head and throwing it.

The swam erupts in goop and several of their group yelp and have to dark back as smelly water sprinkles the edge of the path. Wild beams down from his perch on top of the pile, hands on his hips as he looks down at them. “Who dares challenge my strength?”

“How about you, Vet?” Warriors nudges him lightly, chuckling with a cocked brow. The man is just teasing, and he doesn’t mean any harm, but Legend finds himself irritated anyways. He doesn’t know what it is about Warriors, but the man gets under his skin entirely too easily.

“No thanks.” He grunts, hefting his own stone (so small in comparison) a bit higher and adjusting his grip as he walks over to the swamp.

Wild scrabbles around above, knocking stones aside and sending them rolling down towards the vet. Legend rolls his eyes, dodging quickly around a few and kicking some of the larger ones in the direction of the swamp.

He smiles to himself at the satisfying ‘plonk’ as each one hits the surface.

Four’s head aches and the next time they see Warriors they’re going to kick him in the shins.

The captain is good at planning, usually, but if his planning means that Four is waking up to stare around a vast room where people in red and black PJ suits are eating bananas because said plan went wrong, then they think they’re a bit justified in wanting to kick the captain.

They’d reach to rub their head, to adjust the headband that’s riding too low and letting their hair all hang in their eyes, but their hands are bound behind them, and they’re left huffing their breath and scrunching their nose in an effort to relive their irritation. Their mind is too wild to shake their head, but they let their eyes wander.

Legend’s violet gaze meets theirs, sharp fury bubbling below the surface as Legend sits across from them, hands bound behind him, a rope leading from his wrists to a hook in the wall that is definitely higher than either of the two of them can reach.

As unkind as it is, they breathe a sigh of relief to know they aren’t alone (even if being four people in one body technically means that they’re never alone as is). It’s...nice, having Legend around. They don’t know what it is, but the taller boy feels safe and that’s something that they, especially Red, fond comfort in.

But the fact that two of them are here means that Wars is getting both his shins kicked, fair is fair.

Legend squeaks in that harsh way he does when he’s angry, a poor and rather adorable attempt at a growl, but apparently, he’s unable to make any sort of guttural noise, so the squeak is the best he can do. “I am going to strangle Wars when we get back. Yiga? Seriously?”

They raise a brow. “Weren’t we fighting moblins?”

“And a Talus. Unless these guys have transformative rings, then someone messed up.” The vet grates out, but before he can try and unravel their situation any more, a masked face is shoved into the vets own, one of the pajama clad banana eater’s apparently trying to leer over the vet, breath strong and rank even behind his mask.

“So! The friends of the hero awake! You will call me Astorah! Leader of the Yiga and supreme priestess to Lord Ganon!”

“I’ll call you annoying and maybe alive if you let us go.” legend drawls, unimpressed. “Seriously lady, get your face of mine or I’ll knock it in.”

They smirk. Legend is as polite and well-mannered as can be around the country villages, but the minute he’s away from thick mountain drawls and country twang, the Vet becomes a sour and salty speaker who’s as likely to threaten you as o smile at you. It would almost be funny if they weren’t being held captive.

Astorah makes an indignant sound, hand shooting out to smack Legend across the face. The vet can’t do anything to stop it, and the blow sends his head swinging to the side, a faint grunt escaping as the self-declared priestess stands to her full height (she’s taller than either of them at any rate) and promptly orders her subordinates to see to it that the prisoners be brought to ‘the mountain’.

“The hero will be looking for his friends,” The pajama clad leader declares excitedly, hands rubbing together like a villain in a bad stage play. “So, let's help him out, shall we?”

The vet and smithy exchange a glance, each somewhat surprised at how... pathetic their opponent seems to be.

“Their screams should do the trick; all heroes listen to cries of help after all.” There’s a mad waver in her voice and the pitching is all wrong.

She’s delusional. Vio whispers, and the rest of them are inclined to agree.

Across from them, legend scowls as another red and black clad weirdo comes to grasp his binds, unhooking them from above as yet another does the same to Four.

Ideally, they would try and escape now, but legend only follows along slowly as Astorah leads them through the endless halls and up step after step, murmuring, laughing and shrieking loudly as she goes, hands fluttering and gestures erratic as Legend’s scowl grows more and more each minute.

It all seems rather pathetic, all thing considered, until another, larger, more intimidating individual stops them, voice harsh as it grates out something in a language neither hero can understand. Astorah protests and shrieks at the figure, but they disregard her and instead turn to the heroes.

“Put them back, screams echo within a cave far better than on a mountain top.”

Four’s stomach sinks. Being outside means being closer to escape, means finding the others easier and kicking Wars for landing the in a battle where two of their own had been captured by the enemy.

Legend seems to be of the same idea, his eyes flashing as he pulls at his bonds, tugging away from the guard holding onto him.

The oddly garbed enemy slaps him again, but Legend doesn’t seem to be affected, only pushing harder and biting towards the next hand that swings his way. Astorah pulls away with a light sob, shrieking when Legend’s teeth keep hold of her hand while the enemies around them erupt into action.

Fours unsure of what happens next, their head is still spinning, and quite honestly, they’re sure Hyrule will declare him concussed when they get back, but he does see blows being thrown Legend's way, blades being drawn as shouts echo around them.

There’s a dark of movement, and one of the enemies falls. Four stares in shock for half of a moment before turning their gaze to Legend, who, for all intents and purposes, looks half feral.

Blood stains the Vet’s bucked teeth and his hair swirls as he spins and ducks beneath blows. His hands are still bound tightly behind him, a rope trailing on the ground as Legend evades contact, yet somehow still manages to down another enemy.

Four would try and help, but their mind is spinning, their brain not yet up to date with what their eyes are seeing, that and they’re still bound themself, their arms are fastened behind them and they’re not even sure how Legend is managing to get blows in.

And the he sees.

The vet’s boot swings up to make contact with one of the jaws of the enemy.

Yiga. Wild had told them about them, the Yiga clan, people out for the hero’s blood. The word only comes to mind now, but they’d had to tune out of the battle for a brief moment to remember it. They’re brought back to it as the sound of an agonized scream breaks through the air, accompanied by the harsh snapping sound that Four knows too well from having broken their own bones.

Legend fights with his hands behind his back, kicking out like an angered horse and injuring any who step near. It’s impressive honestly, watching how blood spurts and bones crumple from the force of the vet’s blows, and all that without having use of his hands.

The Yiga back away, eventually leaving the room entirely as Legend squeaks out an angry Legend sound after them, before turning his attention to Four. Four says nothing, and it appear Legend thinks that that’s okay, because he darts towards the door they had been headed too, leading Four with nervous glances being thrown back over his shoulder every few minutes.

The mountain top they emerge onto is higher than Four expected, and they want nothing more than to snuggle down in the cozy parka Legend once leant him, but they have none of their items, and they’re lucky to even be out in one piece.

It takes a lot of work to climb down a mountain with their hands tied, but their fingers are too cold to make any good of the knots, and they manage in the end to climb down. They’re in the last legs when Four notices what looks like a small group of travelers below, and they can almost hear the singing of the Four Sword from them.

They’d dropped their blade in their battle, the very reason they were caught in the first blade. They’re not happy someone else touched it, but they are glad they didn’t leave it behind.

“Four,” Legend’s voice breaks them from their thoughts, and as they turn to face him, they find that Legend’s face is flushed, ears twitching nervously as he avoids their gaze. “Could you...not tell the others about all that?”

“About what?” They clamber down another stone, Legend still within sight as he trails down beside them.

“The...kicking.” Legend flushes. “I know you guys- most of them anyway- could have it handled better. I just, Wars is bad enough as is, I don’t need him bring up my lack of strength next time he decides he needs ammo to mess with me.” There’s a scowl on the vets features as he hops down and across and small hold in the mountain side. “I get it, I’m weak in comparison, they could probably have beheaded those guys with their bare hands, but mine fingers are shit o a good day and-”

Four doesn’t know if they actually figure something out or randomly spew words, but Legend’s eyes turn to them in surprise when the smithy stares down at him. “You do know most Hylia’s can’t do anything by kicking each other, right? I’m planning on kicking Wars when we get back, and the most it’ll do is bruise him.” Their voice is flat, but they let Viol take over, he always had the best endurance out of them when it came to rocky places anyways. “You kicked a man’s ribs in, Legend.”

And it’s not funny, it really isn’t, but they giggle, watching as Legend flushes before their eyes, and when the others trail up towards them, gazes curious and concerned, Four is laughing hysterically.

It could be the head wound, it could be Legend’s face, but the thought that Legend was able to kick a man's ribs in and hadn’t done so to any of them yet was both surprising and highly relieving for whatever reason, and it’s hilarious listening to Legend try and explain himself as the vet protests and struggles against the fact that apparently Hylian’s don’t usually have enough leg strength to kill people with.

Yes, people died back there. Yes, Four just watched them die. Maybe it’s Shadow’s influence, but Four can’t find that they're overly bothered. They are tired and injured and cold, and if they can laugh about something as ridiculous as Legend’s strange strength imbalance, then Hylia danggit they’re going to!

They never do kick Wars’ shins in, they giggle to hard at the thought that Legend doing so could actually break them, so they topple over before they can lift their feet.

[andyet-here-we-are]

I Would Get Into Millions of Accidents Just to See You, Chapter 3 (aka Nurse Geralt AU)

(Check the pinned post for the first two chapters please~)

The next day flows by in a blur for Geralt. He wakes up, takes a shower, prepares a quick but nutritious breakfast for Ciri, and makes oatmeal for himself.

On his way to the hospital, he thinks about Jaskier and wonders if he should call him now. He almost does that, but then he decides against it because he knows that Jaskier is busy having his fourth dream right now probably. It's too early to call him as much as he wants to do so. 

His mind wanders on how cute Jaskier sounds when he is sleepy—when he has just woken up.

Cute, but also usually a bit grumpy even though he denies it with every inch of his being.

***

"That shouldn't be legal," is what Geralt thinks when he steps into the hospital room, unable to take his eyes off Jaskier's sleeping figure. "I can't believe I'm supposed to do that. God, have some mercy on me. I love my job, I really do, but it sucks big time sometimes. Why should I suffer this way?"

A moment later, he is well aware of how dramatic he is being, and how hard he frowns, making a source face. It's not like him to act like this at all.

Damn.

"That dramatic son of a flower must be rubbing off on me," annoyed at himself, he mumbles before he coughs as if that alone is enough to wake the musician up. 

"Good morning," he tries when Jaskier doesn't wake up and slightly turns to the other side of his bed instead.

"Mr. Pankratz, it's your medicine time."

Jaskier slightly opens his eyes just to look at him this time, and the first thing he mumbles is: "What happened to your ears?" before closing his eyes again. 

"What are you talking about?" The nurse questions, checking his ears with his free hand that isn't holding the medicine tray, wondering what he meant by that.

"Are you still asleep?"

"Yes... No. Maybe?" Jaskier mumbles again, half asleep as he rubs his eyes, trying to make sleepiness go away.

"You will have to pick one of them."

The musician opens his eyes after a while and smiles at Geralt.

"Morning. God, what a sight to wake up to."

Geralt must be used at this by now. Because whenever Geralt has to wake him up, no matter how much Jaskier complains at first most of the time, he always utters the same words eventually.

"What a sight to wake up to."

Yet, every time he does that, Geralt's heart flutters in his chest.

"You didn't sound too happy with my ears, though. What was that about?"

"Ah, about that. I had a dream that— promise you won't laugh?"

"Can't do."

"Anyway," Jaskier yawns and explains: "I had a dream that you were an... elf."

"I was a— what?" Geralt laughs.

"Hey! You said you wouldn't laugh!" The musician stares at him like he is ready to kill him. 

"I never said that," Geralt forces himself to stop laughing. "Well, that explains everything."

"Shh, stop interrupting me. It's mean."

"Sorry, I'm all ears. Not elf ears, though, sorry to disappoint you."

"Don't sweat it. Bad guys were trying to steal Mrs. Ansley's—who was a fairy, speaking of which—cookie recipe, which was also the key of a parallel universe, somehow. You were trying to protect the recipe, then puff. Some gingerbread men came out of nowhere to help you, but you tried to... eat them? Well, not just tried actually. You managed to eat their leader. Therefore they decided to join the dark side. Can't blame you, though. They looked pretty yummy. I was about to hop on my unicorn for help when you woke me up. A unicorn wearing a pasta costume. Pink pasta costume. Yeah, yeah, I know, that makes no sense, is there even a pink pasta costume?" He asks sleepily, raising an eyebrow. "Also, I had a magical lute, I think."

"You think that your whole dream makes sense, but just the pink pasta costume doesn't?"

"I've never seen a pink pasta costume, so..."

"Oh, sorry, right. I forgot you have seen everything else but that. The elf version of me, alive gingerbreads and all. My bad."

He chuckles at that lightly.

"Still more possible than a pink pasta costume."

"The most ridiculous dream you had this week might be this one so far."

Jaskier seemed to have taken it upon himself to tell Geralt about his dreams. This was the eighth dream he talked about this week, and it wasn't even Friday yet.

"It was like," he opens his arms wide as if he is presenting the name of his new song to the whole world, " 'Geralt and Jaskier in Wonderland' I blame the medicines. And you," he points at the nurse. "I also blame you. For looking like... " he then gestures at everything, "this."

"You blame me?" The other man snorts, amused. "If anything, you should blame yourself for having the wrong dream. Have you ever looked at yourself? You would make a good elf, not me. You are as bea— I mean, anyway, medicine time."

"I am what now? Wait, wait, wait, were you about to call me beautiful?"

"I was about to call you bearable, but then I thought that would be mean."

"I think you were about to call me beautiful, but then you thought 'That wouldn't be professional, you are his nurse,' or something along these lines. Also, that's not even how you start when you're about to say 'bearable' they are not even pronounced the— "

"That's not what happened."

"Nahh, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what happened, but eh, whatever helps you sleep at night, love."

"You're probably thinking you're still in 'Geralt and Jaskier in Wonderland', go back to sleep, you're delusional."

"I am so not! And that would be your problem even if I was. Wanna check my fever?" He says, giving the nurse a once-over, "I feel hot, suddenly."

"Well, that explains why you're delusional, doesn't it?" Geralt teases. "Take your medicine and you will be just fine."

Jaskier sighs and does as he is told.

"Geralt," Jaskier says before Geralt is about to leave, a grin on his face "I think you are 'bearable', too. "

***

Geralt means to call Jaskier.

He really does.

Yet, whenever he is about to call him, something comes up, and eventually, he just accepts that he is going to have to wait for his shift to be over. 

For some reason, he doesn't want to call him and get interrupted after a minute.

And he doesn't want to send him a text, because he prefers hearing his angelic voice instead.

So, yeah. He is kind of stuck there for now.

***

Geralt finds Ciri laughing at her own joke as she watches The Office when he gets home, and this reminds him of Jaskier since that's something they both have in common. Once again, he finds himself thinking about the musician.

***

“Shit, it hurts,” Jaskier says, holding his chest.

“Maybe it’s the universe’s way to tell you to stop laughing at your own jokes.”

“Oh shut up, the universe can kiss my ass.”

“Seems like it prefers to kick your ass instead.”

That draws an annoyed laugh out of him, which makes him hiss in pain.

“It wouldn’t send me here if it was trying to kick my ass, Mr. Should Have Been A Model But Became A Nurse For Some Reason.”

“I can't believe you still keep using that silly nickname unironically. Don’t you think that it is a bit long?”

“You may be right. Hmm, I’ll just call you ‘Mr. Handsome Nurse,’ from now on.”

“Please don’t. No.”

“How about just ‘Handsome’ ?”

“Still no.”

“Why not? It’s just a fact. You wouldn’t get mad at someone if they would point at a yellow wall and call it a ‘yellow wall’ would you?”

“That’s not the same thing.”

“I see no differences.”

“Then you better get your eyes checked.” 

“Speaking of which—” Jaskier reaches for his scratch book standing on the bedside table “can I borrow your eyes for a second?”

Geralt frowns, wondering what the musician is up to this time.

Jaskier opens his scratch book and stares in his eyes intently for a while and as he scribbles something. "Thanks," he says, "I just needed an accurate model of the stars."

"You know," the nurse shakes his head and answers smoothly: "you could just ask for a mirror."

Geralt can't help but smirk at his open-mouthed speechlessness. 

***

He hears a familiar voice singing, and for a moment he is sure that he has finally gone insane. 

Drying his hands on a washcloth, Geralt makes his way to the source of the voice, thinking "That must how Jerry feels when he follows the smell of a piece of cheese Tom tries to fool him with."

Jaskier's voice is irresistible to him, just like how cheese is irresistible to Jerry.

Absolutely irresistible, and hard to miss.

He could distinguish Jaskier's voice among all the rest if he heard it in a room filled with millions of men singing a song together.

This voice is coming from their living room. To be more specific, from Ciri's laptop—which she was supposed to use for searching her homework topic, but that can wait for now—

"Or I shall die," he hears Jaskier singing oh so sincerely and dramatically "or I shall die!"

"Dad! Please don't be mad, I swear to God I was going to start doing my homework, but—"

The first thing he does when he sits on the couch next to his daughter is grabbing the laptop and rewinding the video to the start. He then checks if the volume is at maximum.

"Shhh," he gestures, all of his attention is on the video he is watching.

He doesn't even realize that he takes a deep breath as soon as he sees the musician's face appear in front of him on the screen before Jaskier even starts singing.

He is as beautiful as ever in his ridiculous mint green shirt that he left the first four buttons undone.

It has cactus patterns on it.

Geralt can't help but wonder if Jaskier wearing this shirt is actually some kind of a secret message to him and him only.

Didn't he say that Geralt was just like a cactus?

"...prickly on the outside sometimes, but soft on the inside? A cactus in the desert.”

His words. Not Geralt's.

What does that even mean then? Something like "I wanna wear you on me like a shirt?"

Okay, he should probably stop because he is reading too much into this and—

"Anyway, so, this song goes to the cruel man who made me want to buy this shirt because it reminded me of him. You know who you are,"

Geralt's breath hitches.

He is not reading too much into this.

If anything, it's vice versa, because Jaskier dedicated a song to him.

Jaskier is thinking about him, too.

Thinking about him too much that he has decided he should dedicate a song to him.

The scene splits into five and one of the boxes on the screen shows Jaskier playing the piano, while in the other he plays the lute occasionally, violin in another one, and accordion in the other one. And in the other, he sings.

Good God. Is there anything this man cannot do?—Besides picking names for babies maybe, since picking names is definitely isn't his strong suit.—

"I tell myself what's done is done

I tell myself don't be a fool

Play the field have a lot of fun

It's easy when you play it cool"

"Does this mean he gave up on me because he got fed up with waiting for my call?" he thinks. But then again, why would he sing a song for him if he gave up?

While watching the video, Geralt is well aware of the fact that he will watch this video again and again and will take special care of each Jaskier— making sure not to miss even the tiniest of the mimic and gesture he does.

"I tell myself don't be a chump

Who cares, let him stay away

That's when the phone rings and I jump

And as I grab the phone I pray

Let it please be him, oh dear God

It must be him or I shall die

Or I shall die"

He was right, this isn't a song that screams: "I'm giving up." Thank God it isn't. Jaskier puts his hand on his chest as he sings, and Ciri sighs next to Geralt, resting her head on his shoulder as she watches the video with him. 

"Oh hello, hello my dear God

It must be him but it's not him

And then I die

That's when I die"

That dramatic son of a flower actually flings himself into an armchair.

"After a while, I'm myself again

I take the pieces off the floor

Put my heart on the shelf again

You'll never hurt me anymore"

While he sings the "put my heart on the shelf again" he puts a heart sculpture on his bookshelf with a serious look and frown on his face. He might have got this heart sculpture just for this video for all Geralt knows.

"I'm not a puppet on a string,"

At this point, Geralt wouldn't be surprised to see actual strings attached to the musician's body just so he could cut the strings. He really wouldn’t be surprised, at all.

Because Jaskier is that extra most of the time.

And Geralt loves that about him.

"I'll find somebody else someday

That's when the phone rings, and once again

I start to pray

Let it please be him, oh dear God

It must be him, it must be him

or I shall die, or I shall die"

The musician's voice goes up effortlessly into an unreachable octave as he sings the last part, and it's impossible not to be impressed. 

But then again, the man puts his heart into everything he does, therefore even doing something like folding a simple frog origami seems impressive when he is the one who's doing it, let alone singing as perfectly as this.

He then slowly walks towards the camera as the other boxes disappear and that one takes over the screen.

"Seriously though," he makes an aggressive 'call me' gesture, and the scene fades to black after that.

"Whoever keeps Jaskier waiting must be crazy," Ciri comments and gave a snort of disapproval and frustration. "He must care about this idiot of a guy a lot if he sings for him like this. What a jabroni. It would take him only a minute to call him."

"Ciri!"

"What? I'm right."

"That's not a nice thing to say," Geralt warns as he hands the laptop back to his daughter.

"I'm surprised that you watched the full thing, by the way. Actually, you don't seem too annoyed with me watching his videos nowadays, and you seemed quite interested in this one."

"I just love Vikki Carr," Geralt says. He has seen the title of the video, after all, so he knew this was a cover of her song. "I've wondered how he sang this song."

"Name five Vikki Carr songs then."

Geralt doesn't know five Vikki Carr songs— he can't even name two, let alone five.

"Okay, I think that's enough fun for you today," the nurse pretends not to have heard his daughter. "Do your homework while I go out to get some milk."

"We have milk at home."

"No, we don't."

"I put it in the fridge myself just this morning, so yeah, we do."

"We're out of these cookies you love, though."

"I thought you said they consumed way too much sugar so we were going to come up with a healthy and as I've read from your invisible subtitles, also probably boring recipe we can make together this weekend?"

"I— God, you ask a lot of questions today." Geralt whispers tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose and letting Ciri's "boring recipe" comment slide.

Fuck him for not saying "I'm gonna go get some groceries," instead.

"I just asked one question, but okay. So? You changed your mind?"

"Yeah, I changed my mind, just for one more week, you can have it."

"Really?! Thanks!"

"Anything you want, pumpkin. Alright, I'm off!"

Geralt ruffles her hair before he grabs his wallet, keys, and most importantly, his phone.

Just before he closes the door, he can hear Jaskier's voice coming from the living room once again.

He cannot blame Ciri at all.

***

"If this is another spam call and not the important call I've been waiting for I swear on all my lute strings that I'll crush that damn phone on the ground and dance upon its bloody ruins! Actually, no, wait, that would mean the possibility of missing the call I've been waiting for, but you got my point."

As soon as Jaskier answers his call and starts talking, he feels like all the tiredness of the day disappears. Jaskier's voice manages to do that even when he is simply busy telling him off, having no idea who he is talking to. 

He can see that Ciri was right. He is an idiot for waiting for the right time.

"I'm seriously so sick of—"

Geralt finally cuts him off by saying: "Wow, I wouldn't wanna be a scammer or something right now, you aggressive Dandelion."

"Wait a second, this voice— Geralt?! Is that really you? Oh my God, you finally ca— I mean—"

Jaskier coughs as if he tries not to sound too excited, "Heey, the best nurse in the existence," Geralt can almost see his flirty frowning, yes, he manages to make even frowning look flirty for crying out loud, "How's it hanging?" he asks, his voice sounds deep, lazy, and dare he say, sensual.

"I should be asking you the same question. Are you still praying by the phone?"

"Someone does stalk me on social media, I see."

"And someone sings a song and makes a pretty impressive video clip for me, I see. My daughter was watching it, and that's how I found out about it. Just for your information."

"So you're not the one who stalks me online. It's Ciri," Jaskier says, and the fact that he remembers Ciri's name warms up Geralt's heart if he's being honest. "Sweet. Cool. Cool. I'm not hurt by that at all."

"Well..."

"Would you die if you let me be happy for just a moment? Not that I'm not happy to know that your daughter still watches my videos, but it would be nice to hear that you were the one who checked my account willingly."

"I'm sure I would see your video today anyway. Maybe it wouldn't be that soon, I admit, but I would see it."

"Is that so?"

"It is so."

Silence.

But it isn't an uncomfortable one.

"Did you really find it impressive?" Jaskier asks, his voice is full of hope and happiness.

"Well—" 

"Nah, I know it's impressive, forget that I asked," he lets out a long sigh, "If I knew making a video clip for you would make you call me right away, I would do that earlier. Were you playing 'hard to get' or something? You know... I find it kinda cruel to make someone who just got out of the hospital keep waiting on the phone for so long. For your information, that 'kinda' is kinda unnecessary here maybe. I call it 'the polite kinda'. Or 'the unnecessary kinda'. " 

The next moment, Jaskier's playful tone leaves its place to a caring, worried one as he keeps talking: "If something is going wrong with your life, I take it back though. Ignore everything I said in that case. Is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Ah, about that— Don't worry, everything is alright," Geralt replies, "I was thinking about calling you today, but I couldn't quite find the time. I know that's not an excuse, and I know I could call you earlier, but I didn't want to call you only to say 'I have to hang up,' a minute later."

"I’m happy to hear that nothing is wrong. And well, even that would be better than leaving me hanging. Or a simple 'Hey, the best patient ever' text would do. You took so long that I would be lying if I said I didn't think about getting involved in another accident."

"I'd rather you didn't."

"I would get into millions of accidents just to see you, Geralt. Provided that I could have you as my nurse every time, of course. What's the point otherwise? I'm not a masochist."

"Such a flatterer you are, Mr. Pan—"

"I'm not trying to flatter you. Cross my heart and hope do die, I'm just scattering the facts around like they are glitters. Or cake sprinkles."

"God forbid! Accidents, death... Aren't we gonna talk about nice things at all?"

"I've been waiting for you to call me forever. I have every right to be bitter about it."

"I'll make it up to you, I promise. How about I start making up to you, starting now?" 

"Sounds like you have something in your mind, Mr. Handsome Nurse." 

"I do, indeed. Have you had dinner yet?" 

"Does strawberry yogurt count as dinner?"

"I highly doubt it. You were complaining about hospital food, and yet that's what you choose to have for dinner?"

"I've never said I count yogurt as quality dinner, but it's still better than the things you dare to serve people as 'food', I should admit, I thought you already came to terms with—"

"Maybe you should come over so I can show you how a proper, nice dinner looks like. I'm not half bad at cooking."

Jaskier is silent on the other end of the line.

"Are you still there?" Geralt asks finally, "I'm sorry if this was too forward of me or too soon, I just thought it could be nice. You could meet Ciri too, that way." 

"No! Yeah! I mean—" if Geralt didn't imagine it, Jaskier sighs and murmurs an angry 'get it together you dumbass,' to himself before he continues talking. "Yes, I'm still here. No, this wasn't too forward of you. I was just taken aback a little bit, sorry. I mean, not every day a handsome nurse who I've been waiting for his call for a decade calls and invites me over for dinner. I'd love that, Geralt."

"I'll send you the address, then." Geralt checks his watch, it's nearly 6 p.m. "Is eight okay for you?"

"Sure, that should be fine. Hey, Ciri still doesn't know, right?"

"I don't think I need to answer that."

"Huh? Why is that?"

"Don't you think she would just grab my phone and call you herself if she knew? Or reaching out to you on every social media possible? Shouting from the rooftops, even?"

"She really likes me that much?"

"She just called me, I quote, an 'idiot', 'crazy', and 'jabroni' after watching your video, so..."

"She did what?!"

"I mean, not directly at me since she doesn't know I'm the 'him' in the 'it must be him', but still." 

"Seems to me like you're in big trouble here."

"Don't even remind me about it."

"I'd be lying if I said that doesn't put some pressure on me though. I mean... What if she doesn't like me?"

"Wha— Ciri already adores you. She adores you so much that it's annoying sometimes."

"It's impossible not to like you," is on the tip of his langue.

"They say never meet your heroes. What if when she actually meets me, she goes 'Meh, that's it?' What if I disappoint her somehow?"

"Worrying about earth getting invaded by the aliens in pink pasta costumes and tutus would much more sense compared to this. Believe me."

Jaskier laughs at that, but Geralt can still sense that he is not completely convinced.

"If you say so."

"I know so, Jaskier. I know so."

[correctdangerousfellows]

Hi! Do you mind writing hcs about the boys playing genshin impact?

a/n: anon i am in love with you thank you so so much for requesting this

the dangerous fellows play genshin headcanons

ethan

- a VERY casual player. played up to ar 25 and when he saw he had to do something called ascension he dipped immediately

- still logs on to do commissions tho

- and forgets to collect the rewards for it every time

- has no idea how ANYTHING in genshin works. he unironically builds barbara dps and it somehow works out?? good for him!

- THE LUCKIEST PULLS. EVER. he pulled diluc, qiqi, and mona on his first ten pull on the standard banner and zion hasn’t spoken to him since

- accepts co-op requests but never talks in chat. couldn’t figure out how to use the chat function so he jumps to communicate

- he lets people raid him because he never figured out how to ascend his characters either :’)

harry

- an absolute angel

- has an emotional attachment to traveler and refuses to take them off his team no matter how many good pulls he gets

- the only person who actually doesn’t kill timmie’s birds

- if he comes across hilichurls sleeping or dancing he leaves them alone. it doesn’t matter if it’s a commission he’ll just pass it for the day

- LOVES co-oping with people who are a lower world lvl than them. he helps them do their world quests and commissions, and even sticks around to kill bosses and unlock domains

- everybody is in love with him

- lets people steal resources from his world

- a very very friendly guy in chat

- plays healers in domains

zion

- thought genshin would be lame but downloaded it anyways

- ended up developing a gambling addiction

- cannot save for the life of him. the moment he gets 160 primogems he pulls IMMEDIATELY

- didn’t know he was supposed to wish on the promotional banner until eugene clowned him for it

- buys the battle pass every time

- HAS THE WORST LUCK. he’s sitting at a c6 amber and lisa rn

- had no idea he could offer the anemoculus and geoculus to the statues until ar 35

- doesn’t have any idea on what the fuck artifacts are. he slaps on random shit on his characters and prays

- let eugene into his world once and afk’d for a bit. came back to see all his violetgrass and cor lapis was gone

eugene

- hides the fact he plays genshin

- ar 55 lookin ass

- VENTI MAIN

- all his supporting characters’ builds are absolute DOGSHIT venti is the only one he actually cares about building

- trolls people in co-op

- not in an obnoxious way tho he just screws around a lot

- says he’s a f2p but has all the bp weapons

- his venti does so much dmg u don’t understand. he one shot level 90 stormterror with a charged basic attack

- goes into worlds just to raid them, but he does still help with some stuff if the person he’s stealing from wants

- flexes his 5 star characters

lawrence

- the only smart one who knows how everything in genshin works. mid luck on both artifacts and pulls, but he saves up accordingly

- has notifications on for genshin leaks. usually gets his leaks like 2-3 days earlier bc he has his ways

- unintentionally became a very famous genshin player because his builds and commentary are absolute insane. he's hitting 1 million crit easily

- uses all his brain power to estimate his primogems and when to roll 😭 fucking nerd

- judges everyone secretly for their builds secretly. if he's feeling like an asshole that day he'll join their world and give very passive aggressive advice that’s not advice

- speaking of which he takes advantage of EVERYONE'S world. he secretly steals their resources and dips immediately afterwards after promising to help them :^)

- even though a lot of his characters, weapons, and artifacts are leveled up he still has like 15 million mora wtf

the day i stop torturing zion in my headcanons is the day i die. thank you so much once again anon! this was super fun and i'm sorry this was super late. i’m still recovering from covid so i spend around 20 hours a day just playing genshin to pass time :’)

> lychee

[jupitertherevolution]

its 230 but ive done tha writin check it out

“food as a love language”, johndave, 1k, slow burn but just barely the sparks

It’s 7pm on a Tuesday, and you and your boy are exhausted. Your boy being one Dave Strider, and you being one John Egbert. Though you’re not really thinking much about identity right now. In fact, the vague, nebulous concept of identity is the furthest thing from your mind right now. At the forefront of your mind right is a different vague, nebulous concept, one that has plagued humanity since the dawn of time: being fucking hungry.

Yes, you and Dave are incredibly hungry. It’s been a long day at work, you at the gas station and him at the Marshall’s, it’s storming like one sunuvabitch outside, and neither of you want to cook.

… But you will. Why? Because for one you’re the better cook out of you two, and you know that Dave wants you to cook even if he’s not saying it yet. The other reason is that if you don’t you’ll both just eat a few slices of cheese. And that’s not gonna cut it.

So while Dave sits his ass down on a barstool and leans on the counter, you consult the fridge. There’s not much in terms of raw ingredients.

“Man, we didn’t get to grab any groceries…” you complain aloud.

“We could reheat those wings?�� Dave suggests from his slump on the counter. But you’re struck with an idea. You grab the wings, some shredded cheese, and a packet of tortillas. You snag some vegetable oil from the cabinet and set a frying pan onto the stove. You don’t turn on the burner just yet.

“Dude, what are you even cooking over there? The fridge is a barren-ass desert right now. A cold desert. A tundra. Gonna find a minecraft igloo with some jankass basement in there,” Dave says.

You smile as you start deboning the wings. You put the meat in a bowl and pop it in the microwave for 45 seconds. “I’m making leftovers quesadillas,” you tell him.

You turn on the burner and pour a little oil onto the pan. Just about the size of a quarter. You used to make these all the time when your dad couldn’t make it home by dinner time. You’ve got it down to a science. “They’re just quesadillas with whatever meat you have around the house.”

He snorts a bit at ‘meat you have around the house’. “Dude, you are a blessing,” he says.

You bat your hand as you swirl the oil around in the pan. “Nah, it’s easy. Besides, we gotta eat something, right?”

“No but like… you didn’t have to cook a wholeass meal.” The microwave beeps and you take the chicken out of the microwave. You lay a tortilla on the pan and it sizzles. “Cooking isn’t that hard, Dave. You just,” you start. You grab the cheese and sprinkle a generous amount. “…Add the cheese…” Next you lay a bit of chicken. “…and the chicken…” You grab a spatula and scoop under one side of the tortilla, folding it in half on itself. “…and then you just flatten it like this!”

He giggles. “Like my own personal cooking youtuber.”

“Oh, uh, whoops.” You say, a bit flushed.

“Nah, nah, it’s cool. I like it. It’s like I’m right there with you cooking, except not actually because that would be a disaster, I can’t cook for shit.”

You make a little pout as you flip the tortilla off of the pan and start making another one. “I’m sure you could cook fine if you learned to,” you say.

You can hear him smiling as he says, “Yeah but why would I need to? I’ve got you here as my personal chef!”

You laugh a bit at that. “Yeah, yeah. Anyways, can you grab some plates or some drinks? I’m almost done.”

“O-kay,” he says and makes the most demonic noise while stretching before sliding off of his seat and heading to the minifridge at the other side of the apartment. “You want a mountain dew or a pepsi?”

“Pepsi!” you answer and flip the second quesadilla off. One would think that’d be the end of it, but no! You always make two folded ones per person. Basic leftovers quesadillas rule. You put another tortilla on. “Man, I can’t believe you always buy pepsi… I want coke sometimes, man!” Dave gripes.

“Sorry Dave, but I just don’t like the hostile red. I need my soothing blues.” You’re on the verge of bursting into laughter just from saying it.

“What are you, a bull?” he says.

“Yes,” you say and hold a straight face for about a second before cracking up. It’s not that funny, but it’s become a running joke that you like pepsi better purely because of its ‘soothing blue packaging’.

You flip the third quesadilla off and get started on the last one. Tortilla, cheese, and chicken, in a nice rhythm. “Plates?” you say.

“Right, right,” Dave says and opens up the cabinet. “I’m still surprised you did all this. You didn’t have to.”

“Dave, I told you, it’s easy! Plus it tastes really good, and I didn’t really feel like eating shitty food tonight,” you say.

He sets the plates down on the counter across from you. “No but like dude, anything you cook is like, insanely good. I wake up every day and thank god I get to have a roomie who cooks like a goddamn michelin-approved restaurant chef.”

Your face warms a bit, but you flip the last quesadilla off and turn off the burner. “…Thanks Dave,” you finally manage to stammer out.

Finished with the cooking, you grab the pizza cutter and slice the quesadillas into quarters. You two grab your plates and drinks and sit next to each other. It’s as good as you thought it would be.

“Man, maybe you should teach me to cook. This is godly,” Dave says in between bites. “I’d be happy to teach you whenever you want, Dave,” you say.

The quesadillas are quickly demolished, and after putting the dishes in the dishwasher, you two are satisfied. “You down to just chill on the couch? Watch a movie?” he says.

You stand up and head to the living room corner. “Yeah, but I get to pick.” He complains as he gets up, “Nooo, you’re gonna pick something unironically shitty…”

“Hey, chef’s priveleges.”

[ahtsumu]

cOuNtRy BoY i LoVe YoUuU–– suna rintarou.

GENERAL HEADCANONS

☆ the country boy who isn’t even country omg his family isn’t from the south they just moved there when he was like 2 and he just talks with an accent

☆ suna hates everything about southern culture except hunting

he’s actually REALLY good at hunting bc it’s a very quiet, stealthy thing and there’s nothing this boy loves more than silence lmfao

but he doesn't go very often bc sometimes it’s just too much effort and he just Doesn’t Care 

he’ll just skip school a couple times to hunt during hunting season and pull up later with a whole ass deer in the trunk like “y’all want some food or what”

☆ wears camo unironically i’m so sorry

every time he pulls up in camo atsumu’s like LMFAO Y’ALL SEEN SUNA?

AND SUNA’S STANDING THERE IN HIS CAMO TROUSERS LIKE (¬_¬)

he loves the vibe it gives !! no one knows what he’s going for with the camo but he seems happy with it pls let him live

☆ he’s probably the most un-southern gent you’ll ever meet

doesn’t hold the door open for anyone, doesn’t care for small talk, the biggest rbf in the world LOL

☆ plays cornerback on the football team! it’s definitely not as flashy as the quarterback but he’s insanely fast and strong and is literally the god of defensive plays

tbh he only joined bc it seemed like it’d be a fun way to get Physical without getting in trouble but he turned out pretty mf good at tackling and intercepting passes

☆ suna is the world’s worst student lmfao he barely submits his work on time just to hold onto the minimum GPA he needs to play football

he’s not even dumb !! he’s just so lazy

THE TEACHERS HATE HIM THEY’RE ALL LIKE “young man you best be turnin’ in your work on time nowadays or i promise i’ll call your mother, dagnabit” and he’s just like “aight”

☆ he hates school but the one subject he loves is woodworking

the teacher is just as chill as him and it’s the one class he’ll never skip (even during hunting season!!)

☆ his parents have office/desk jobs but their house sits on a patch of land that they grow some of their own vegetables on

suna never does farm or fieldwork

when his parents tell him to do his chores he’ll just call kita or osamu for help and then watch them from his rocking chair on the porch while sipping on dr. pepper LMAO

atsumu always tags along to chill and watch with suna too 😭💀

☆ has a pretty diverse taste in country music

loves softer artists like john mayer and hunter hayes but also vibes with bro-country like morgan wallen and luke combs

DOES NOT AND WILL NEVER MAKE HIS OWN PLAYLISTS !!! he just downloads atsumu’s and osamu’s and calls it a day LMFAO

DATING HEADCANONS

☆ k so somehow you’re dating suna !! how did that happen ?? no one knows !

everyone’s like tf? except suna lmfao he goes “yeah we’re together what about it”

☆ he’s not a huge sap but he loves you and woodworking so he’s always making you things in class

you get a lot of little wooden birds from him 😭🥰

☆ suna’s a really chill boyfriend so expect a lot of low-effort dates LOL

one day you’re both just chilling in your house and you’re like “hey can we go dancin’ sometime”

he’s like “can’t we do that here”

HE THROWS ON SOME JOHN MAYER IN YOUR LIVING ROOM AND SAYS “aight twirl” WITH A SMIRK

☆ your dates look a lot like:

laying at home together

grabbing takeout

mostly just popeyes or kfc bc fried chicken is his weakness

watching drive-in movies !!

he’ll bring your favorite snacks to eat too and you’re like aw how sweet and he’s like “i just felt like eating it don’t read into it too much” HAHAHA

lying down in the backyard to look at lightning bugs

but he’d never suggest it on his own !! you’d have to be like “sunaaaaaa plsssssss”

and then he’d lie down and be thinking “wtf this is so lame”

but then he sees your face all in awe by the little flurry of lights and then he’s like “oh this ain’t too bad” AWW

☆ remember how suna doesn’t make any of his own playlists? yeah he’s not changing that for you

he starts playing atsumu’s playlist of love songs one day in the car and you’re like “omg 🥺for me?” but then he’s like ”lol this ain’t mine don’t get too excited”

tbh he just doesn’t care about that kinda stuff but if you made him a playlist he’d actually be touched <3

☆ listen he might be super lowkey with his affection but if you make him a string bracelet. he’ll never take it off

the boys see this colourful new thing around his wrist and are like “hey what’s THIS ?!!!!!!!!!” and he’s like “nothin’ i just found it in the woods”

but then they see him smile just a bit when he looks at it

and sometimes he looks right at you after

and then they’re like ahhhhhhhhhhhh 😏

[the-acid-pear]

Scarface was too fucking boring, didn't make it past chapter 3, but that's good, because that means Baki-Dou time 😍

Time to read the fourth book in this series! Excited to see Musashi <3

Chapter 1

COLORS

Baki please stop flexing

A FELLA SAYING THE SAME I SAID WHEN YUJIRO PULLED HIS SOB STORY, FR GO TRY SOMETHING ELSE! What happened with that whole "i don't care about fighting" eh Baki?!

Chapter 2

HOHO ALI JR???

ah no :/

HOLY FUCK is this quality bad!

He wants to taste defeat i see

TOKUGAWA PLEASE STOP SMOKING

Oh they removed the... Egg in the back of the neck, nice

God this guy's tits so fat 🥵

FINALLYYY HOW LONG SINCE WE SAW A FIGHT IN THE ARENA? A PROPER FIGHT I MEAN

Chapter 3

He doesn't even know 🐍

DON'T BRING THAT FELLA HERE RETSU KICKED HIS ASS IN TIME. RECORD

Oh i saw fanart of this scene

Baki, it's your fault that you are bored, you fucking teen

This shit boring ME

Chapter 4

Oh, goroukou is a title

I like how the prime minister is becoming a recurrent character

I thought he said babe for a sec-

That little "oh~" is a bit sus, are the old men... No, it can't be 😳😳😳

I'm fucking choking fuck

GOD ALMOST READ THAT AS JOHN CENA 😭

"yes <3"

These ppl never learn

Chapter 5

What a way to go, a la gamzee /j

This dude so weird lmao

FAHDGAHDH king

Dude he has huge round eyes tf you talking bout?

IGDUFSUEASEUURSS he's such a freakkk 😭😭😭

This is the most wtf thing Baki has pulled, remember when this was about fighters fighting? I don't know enough about science for this shit either man

Okay so their hug wasn't Tokugawa being touchy like he is, this guy is even worse, se juntaron el hambre y las ganas de comer HSHAFSFG

Chapter 6

Baki's dead

Katsumi about to kill get killed by my grandpa i see

ALSO KATSUMI OG HAIR WOOO

Katsumi bro don't be so happy over nearly killing him-

I love seeing him get better tho

Uwaadgsgsjdga 😍😳🤤 twisting my hair irl,,, 🥴

Finally Motobe remembered he was a character here 😐

FSGSHDAHDA KOSHO PLS

I LOVE that they got dark lips again

IM SORRY GOUKI HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT EVERYONE?! LTDKFsjyrd 😭

Jack's scar looks cool ngl

Retsu living the good life lmao

AND HOW DO YOU KNOW, GRANDPA?

Hana just doesn't care, smartest Baki character lmao

Idk what they talking bout but good for em <3

Cum basement

Chapter 7

SHOW US MUSASHI'S COCK

Obsessed he thought his heart was failing 😭

Dude you can just hear the heart beat of your friends/opponents just like that? 🤨

Notice Gaia in the top left 🥴

WHY CAN HE RECOGNIZE EACH OF THEIR HEARTBEATS AAHSGA

Thick 🥵

Unironically built different

Chronic back pain if you ask me, that's how I stand to relieve my agony

Did. Did you just call him a femb-

STOP SHOWING ME PANELS FROM VAGAMOND

I love John sm lmao

Mr Musashi has 2 (3?) dads

Chapter 8

HAIRY LEGS 🥴

Those things look like boobs

Bet you would know eh SHAFADB

They jerked off the mummy?

Reminds me of eye surgery

AFjshAFDGAJAHAF

Mf came out the tube ripped af 😭

Chapter 9

Everyone is so feminine lately good ol Kureha fell behind 😭

I like his bandana tho it's cute

OH HE TOO? AND HE'S NOT EVEN THAT STRONG

Fat tits 🥴

Eheojeudkshs 😖😳👉👈

JACK STOP YOU ARE BIG ENOUGH ALREADY

HOLY FUCK

You know like i understand Baki, he is at the highest he can be rn, NO ONE can defeat him, but the rest? Like c'mon y'all just beat each other up or something

Ah, the miracle of birth 😍

Chapter 10

I love how all these two do is hang out together in bars, boybosses

TF IS UP WITH THAT ICE? AHDHS

I love what they have

Hana thinking of getting his 4 limbs broken again i see

WOOO!! Nice cock Mr Musashi 😳

HANAYAMA PLEASE 😐

Chapter 11

I love those freaks

I just now I'm seeing the little scars on his cheeks from the fight with Spec ☺️

I love the fact that Musashi has hair in his legs BUT not his arms like ??? Okay king

Heated scientist moment

HOHO POGGERS 👀

Chapter 12

UTSURAARSDFAFA sibling goals

GIRLBOSS 😍

URAURUSYRSAESGA IN LOVE???

Holy shit she's amazing

Chapter 13

And his ass is very thick too 😳

Those fucking sunglasses, obsessed

Debatable, he got struck by lightning :/

HE WAXES HIS HAIR? OMFG OBSESSED

WHY IS HE WEARING THAT LMAO 😭

Nooo they censored the cock again 😔😔😔

DO IT QWEEN 💅

STOP SAYING SHE'S GONNA FUCK THE CLONE

"I'm exciteddddd" "ok."

Chapter 14

You just hate seeing a girlboss win

She truly is amaizing

Also i just realized spirits have been showing up since the first book so this isn't so crazy lol

MF HOW IS THAT GONNA HELP 😭😭😭

THE LITTLE BUBBLES AND SPARKLES... I BET HE DID 🥺

Chapter 15

WHY ARE HIS TITS SO ROUND AND FAT GODDAMN IT,,, 😳😖

Glad seeing some things never change

He looks so much like Jun

IGSITSURAURZES EPICCC

Someone question if Yujiro knew how too write obsessed,,,

Chapter 16

Goddamn it you got even older in the past 3 or so chapters bro

Mouth to mouth soul transference

OHHH

HIS EYEBROWS FELL HOW IGDUTSITDIYDIGD

Some mf got turned on by this HELP 😭

Chapter 17

I love how Yujiro and Hana are still getting ready to throw hands while this happens lol

Okay yeah that was super disrespectful honestly, guy is having a chat :/

HAHAGSJAHA obsessed

God i thought it was Hana the one grabbing some random lady for a second AFDJSJSSJS

He cute af ngl

POOR GUY MUST BE SO CONFUSED OMFG,,,

Fsr I'm surprised he can talk, like it should be obvious but in all the fanart i saw he never said a word, also, he's so damn respectful 😍

Chapter 18

Idk he was never that clever /hj

Hehehe blood

I love how John can only sit that way

The size of his balls lmao

Coward won't even fight with his dick out smh :/

God he mad cute-

Chapter 19

I MISS THE DEATH ROW FELLAS FUCKKK

Hm i think this random tiny bald man is not Tokugawa but someone that looks awfully similar to him

YEAH NO SHIT I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM, HE MUST BE SO DAMN OVERWHELMED

Apparently there was a cameo, i don't know enough about anime to know or care

Chapter 20

He's tripping balls

Tokugawa should have gone a bit slower with this poor guy, this is like a lot to process at once <:/

Nvm he's doing better than me

Oydirsusefs look at himmm

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND OMFG DIDN'T DOPPO FIGHT THIS GUY?!

SOMEONE ELSE RECOGNIZED HIM HE ISSS

Chapter 21

OHDIRAYEASURRSUURS HE DOESN'T KNOWWW FFS

Musashi be like °_°

LOOK AT THAT SMILE LMAO

He's just chilling, mentally killing this dude

Murder baby

Chapter 21

The way his eyes are drawn is so cool

YRAURSUFSIDTGA

And he jokes too! Wow I'm in love 😍

(nsfw) CAN YOU HANDLE DICK LIKE THAT TOO? 😍

WOW

I TAKE BACK THAT QUESTION

I remember a show where you would bring your own knives and swords and go thru a bunch of test, Musashi should have been one of them

Mf truly is like :]

I love how he didn't buy it

I can't wait for him to fight Yujiro 😍

Chapter 23

He truly is 😌

ATFJAIDQYSF OBSESSED

He was happy this time at least, 5 times he lost already btw

Tokugawa truly in unhateable lmao

Chapter 24

IM SORRY, HIS LEG???

Oh I forgot Musashi does that

JAGSKSGSKSGS HIS FUCKING FACE I CAN'T 😭

I miss when translators would add notes i don't want to google shit myself :/

"I'm hard as rock" /j

Chapter 25

Look how happy he issss

MUSASHI POG MUSASHI POG-

I love how Tokugawa can't believe he got it first try and it's trying to lie now sjdakdyv

This mf is actually making me insane what the actual fuck i don't know what he has but he's gonna make me act up 😳

Mf be shadow boxing too dammit /j

Baki please

Chapter 26

OLD MAN JUST WANTS A PUBLIC TO SEE THIS LMAO

Look at the size of Baki's eyes holy fuck lmao

He's gonna yeet him!

OH NOOOO

FIRST HIS DAD NOW MUSASHI, THIS GUY CANT CATCH A BREAK LMAO

Chapter 27

How little time passed? They have barely moved

Yeah you did it last book too Baki

King shit

Chapter 28

AKSGSKGSJSGS KING

I love how he only now realized

Okay no he has a point

I love how he just calls him boy

Look at that smug face

I trust Musashi but at the same time he, really should be walking around this new world alone. Now, if i were to accompany him... 🥴/j

Baki please

Chapter 29

I love how soft the artstyle suddenly got, like if done big a big brush

Yujiro you just insulted every single anime character in history

Baby Baki's just like "Ok."

I like how Yujiro looks here

AUGHHJF HE'S SO BABY 🥺

HOHO badass

Chapter 30

He died 😔

Idiot hasn't even beat he 0.5 reaction seconds lmao 🤣

HOHOOOOO?!? 👁️👁️

"my curiosity exceed my fear!!" I RESPECT THIS MAN SO MUCH??

Chapter 31

AMAIZING HONESTLY

Fighter to fighter communication

SHIT LOOK AT THE STATE OF THAT HAND

He's just gone now LMAO

I honestly don't mind Baki being weak against this, he never fought against a two handed swordman, this is new territory

Chapter 32

Oh his really tripping balls now this is why he shouldn't be alone

NVM HE'S STILL DOING BETTER THAN ME ON A DAILY BASIS, I HAVE A LOT TO LEARN FROM THIS MAN

I just now realized he's barefoot

Nice ass king

The policemen are quite nice

He's very cooperative but i can't blame the cops either

Chapter 33

Yeah no shit that must be so insane

IF YOU HADN'T DROPPED OFF SCHOOL THEN...

That's kinda funny but idk man he's right i think

He's just like :3

I love how he isn't picking up a fight out of malice but rather just instinct like, he can't understand shit that is going on

YOU ARE SO RIGHT BAKI IT ISN'T BORING FOR ME EITHER

Chapter 34

Don't you fucking dare shave him Itagaki

It's funny how it took 2 books and a half for Baki to start being a protagonist

Holy fuck did Baki add height or is Miyamoto that big?

Wow how perfect i ran out of space just now!! Having fun with this book ngl :]

[hotchley]

Congratulations on 300 sumayyyah!! That’s a really great milestone and I totally understand why they all follow you! Could I have 🐚 for Hotch, as well as ⚔️ and 🫀 (bau as teachers) I’m so sorry if the last one is a little overwhelming, and I would definitely understand if you don’t have enough time/ don’t want to do that one!

Aah thank youu!! That’s so sweet of you as well!

🐚 and a character and i’ll write some happy headcanons

so his favourite thing about the house he buys after he retires is that he can finally have the home library he always wanted and every shelf is filled with books from every genre ever

his favourite colour is actually yellow, but being unit chief means he has to look professional so it’s not really a good idea, but Penelope knitted him a yellow scarf that he wears every year without fail

although he may not seem like it, he’s really good at giving meaningful presents and all of the team, including the BAU kids are always in awe of just how good he is- especially when some of them don’t even know what they want

one of his favourite things to do is capture the soft and domestic moments of the team because it reminds him of the reasons why they do things so he just an entire album of them (they all know he does this and subtly take photos when he’s being domestic)

he’s not an idiot, so he knows when Jack is only pretending to be asleep, but he also knows he won’t be a kid forever, so he will always carry him into the house no matter how obvious it is he’s awake

⚔️ and i’ll give you an image from my novel board that reminds me of you

I knew what image it was going to be as soon as I saw it was from you, which makes a change

Because you like Pride and Prejudice, Downton Abbey and this just reminded me of being a hopeless romantic that wants to make things better and light so it was just a vibe <3

🫀 and the bau as *insert thing*

I’m doing the “Core 7″ because I... cannot be bothered to do everyone from Gideon up to Kate, I hope that’s okay!! And I only say Kate because I’m still on season 10 whoopsie 

Also, I live in England so I’m doing it based on those stereotypes (I say stereotypes, I mean I’m turning them into teachers I’ve had)

Spencer: the absolute life-saver of a chemistry teacher. It doesn’t matter what day it is, whether it’s Friday after school or Tuesday morning, he’s there to help you. Will never make you feel stupid for not understanding “basic” concepts because he gets that sometimes things just don’t click and will help you until it does, no matter how long it takes or how many different ways you need to try it. Everyone’s favourite science teacher. Sometimes gives you more detail than you need, but it is always so the thing you’re learning about makes more sense.

JJ: the P.E teacher. But not the normal P.E teacher that literally doesn’t care so long as you make some sort of effort. No, she’s the P.E teacher that also coaches the netball team, and is absolutely obsessed with netball as always. Her favourites are the girls that play netball: she’ll gossip with them, tell them to help the others and get them out of lesson whenever needed. So it’s great if you play netball, but not if you don’t.

Derek: Hehe. Okay, so he’s a design technology teacher, but the really nice one that just supports everyone with whatever it is they’re doing. Really big on safety, but not in a patronising way, in a: guys if someone gets hurt it’ll be terrible way. Everyone loves him and hopes they get him for D.T because he’s just the best. Never judges you based off your abilities, only cares about whether or not you tried and will always use his lunch break to try and salvage your project. 

Penelope: So you know how there are always two art teachers and one of them is always insane? Well, Penelope is the other art teacher that everyone genuinely loves. She really cares about the subject, but she’s not pretentious about it and she encourages the students to do whatever feels right. She loves showing the class photos of her cats, never snaps or shouts when people forgets thing and is always willing to demonstrate how to do something, no matter how many times she’s already done it before. Is an absolute angel, that always gets distracted by other more fun projects, and is definitely dating Derek.

Rossi: Your history teacher that was old enough to have actual memories of the things you’re learning about. Is a good enough teacher, but sometimes you do wonder whether you’re actually learning the stuff you need to. Is absolutely obsessed with creating debates over the smallest things, even though he always undermines the people that actually get involved. Unironically says he’s going to play devil’s advocate and definitely says some stuff he probably shouldn’t.

Emily: The french teacher that is somehow terrifying, lovely and somewhat inappropriate, all at the same time. She’s terrifying if you leave your speaking booklet at home, and if you don’t actually try and put on an accent, but will also bring in snacks for the last day of term and definitely has thousands of stories about the time she spent in France. Will destroy you if you don’t hand in your homework, or if you used google translate, but praises the people that hand it in, no matter how bad it was. Also lets you watch French films- defo makes inappropriate comments if there’s a kissing scene.

Hotch: the other history teacher that nobody really knows where they stand with because he’s a bit of a confusing character, but is deep down an absolute angel and is absolutely loved by the people he teaches. Seems to always be miserable and sad, but is actually just a front because when they like you, or when you’re nice, they get really happy and will willingly/deliberately make jokes, but not at anyone else’s expense. Is younger than the other history teacher but has no idea what pop culture is which means references go over his head. Will mark every exam question you give him way too harshly in preparation, but really does want you to do well. Will not accept people saying they’re bad at history, and is definitely the emotional support teacher for multiple people- doesn’t tell you that you’re overthinking when you cry, but will remind you that he has faith in you and is just an overall bean.

This low-key got out of hand, but I hope you liked it!!

[vtmb2s]

I had this from an ask meme from like 2 months ago or so and deleted the og post, I dunno why -_-  anyway it was in my google docs so I’m reposting it

🔥

How did they first meet? What was their first impression of each other?

You know… fun Zion Canyon trip!! (credit for this one goes to Dany cause I don’t have good ideas but the whole ordeal would actually happen pre-game, because that’s when the courier would most likely sign up for a caravan I think) 

Audrey thought Follows-Chalk was just messing with her when he said who they were gonna meet, no way this guy is still alive. Needless to say she hates him, she’s heard enough horrendous things about him in her NCR days to form her opinion. He didn’t like her much either aaaghhh how can you see through my fake atonement thing where I’m basically doing the same as before. (she doesn’t really see through it initially, she’s just too stubborn to buy the whole redemption arc thing from the beginning and ends up realizing that she just happened to be right). Understanding why she doesn’t trust him but also resenting that. 

Who felt romantic feelings first?

fjjhdsjhd he does probably, vaguely. She has a much harder time accepting it considering his background and all that, so that came later.

Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

YEAH! Both actually, enemies to vaguely friends to lovers and all that but like I said, Audrey has a much harder time coming to terms with this, she feels a little stupid about it because she knows what this guy has done!!! ( and he knows that, hence why he’s pushing it all down in favor of his stupid little revenge thing) He’s so weird and just looks like a mummy, what is there to like objectively. But she does. What thematic parallels do to a mfer 😔

Who initiated the relationship?

She did… Canyon visit nr 2, she technically fucking hates it there but for some reason she wants to go back (well. you know why), perhaps just a little vacation. And well there was clearly something there so why act on it. The most embarrassing moment of her life but it’s worth it I suppose. 

Who said “I love you” first?

Also her… Sorry queen you have to do all the work

Who gets jealous easily?

I think him but not in a way where he’d say anything, he’s just like 😐 but you can’t see it because. bandages. And Audrey has no competition lol so. 

Who is more protective?

Also him, she gets into more stupid shit and isn’t as crazy. 

Who remembers the little things?

She does :)

Who uses the cheesier pickup lines?

God neither. They’re too weird for pickup lines. If anything Audrey would list a few bad ones she overheard on the strip as a joke.

What does a first date look like for them?

They don’t go on dates lmao. What is there to do in a canyon, they’d just go to some random place where there are no other people and talk about whatever.

What do they like to do together?

Just mundane things, doing random shit while one is talking about whatever. A lot of times it’s just Audrey chatting about something funny or weird that happened to her on her travels while she puts on one of her favorite holotapes and does something, her stories are more light-hearted after all :/

Other than that… nothing too insane, they’re too weird to have proper hobbies. Her making him read his stupid mormon bible out loud so she can hear his sexy grandpa voice 😍

Do they like PDA?

No -_- maybe hand holding when no one’s looking, if anything. 

What are their big spoon / little spoon arrangements?

God he’s probably gonna die if she tries to spoon.

Does one like the cuddle more than the other?

She does but it’s not really possible sometimes. Leans against him until he's like aha. okay that’s enough :/

Who hogs the blankets?

Audrey does. She never sleeps much when she’s travelling so when she finally does get a proper night’s rest it’s limbs thrown around. Taking the entire blanket for herself. Sleeping for 20 years.

Do either of them like to cook?

I can’t imagine either, she just does it out of necessity. She can’t cook though, it’s blamco mac and cheese every mf day.

If they get married, who proposes first?

Godddd realistically he would at least think about it but they don’t get married lol. The mental image of it makes me cringe too much.

What kind of wedding do they have?

:/

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Does anyone object to their relationship? 

NO LMAOOOOO no one wanted them to get together and pretty much everyone would object to it if they knew. She probably doesn’t tell her family but if they knew they’d be against it, for obvious reasons. She doesn’t tell her friends either except Callisto lol, who thinks it’s epic somehow. Great Khan past and all that, not that she agrees with the legion in any way but 🤷‍♀️

Do they have any kids?

Maybe they do… maybe not. Who knows, I don’t control them.

(I made up two but Idek if they exist. a son named Ben and a daughter, Rachel. they’re weird and that’s all you need to know)

Do they have any pets?

I was gonna say no but she still has Rex who she forgot to return to the King 💔

DIANA/KING

How did they first meet? What was their first impression of each other?

In the followers' camp, not long after she moved to Freeside :) iirc the King tells a story about how he went to the Followers Camp to seek help regarding Rex and ended up yelling at them and even knocking out a few doctors.. something similar, one of his guys got their ass beat and the King got impatient and asked why tf this is taking so long. And Diana told him to sit his ass down and wait, which resulted in an argument 🙄 As for the first impression. Diana thought he was just your typical annoying man, maybe sexy and in a cooler suit than the guys on the strip, but annoying nonetheless. And the King thought she was being rude and had a big mouth. But again, kind of in a sexy way.

Who felt romantic feelings first?

THE KING… pretty quickly actually. A few months after the argument they had at the old mormon fort. For Diana on the hand it took a little bit longer :/

Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Hm not really, but like I said Diana didn’t really fall that fast for him. She met him shortly after she left the Gomorrah (she was a dancer, not a prostitute but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t seen and experienced some shit) so she’s not really thinking about men and pretty much ignores him flirting with her (also he stops once he finds out about her past lol). She figures she likes him because they do have the same principles and something about being good people in a shitty world and all that so there’s a lot of admiration there, also their shared love for music and stuff. Elvis things. But she’s trying to heal from the shit she witnessed at the strip so no thanks!! Until… until...

Who initiated the relationship?

Well… technically him, he was the first one to flirt with her probably but she never really paid any attention to it. The actual relationship though.. her.

Who said “I love you” first?

Diana but I think he would have said it too… she was just faster 😌

Who gets jealous easily?

Both do. She’s sexy so nasty old men will flirt with her while she’s doing her job but the King doesn’t have to know that because he would be MAD. Diana on the hand will act like she’s mad at him when random people are being a little too friendly with him -_-

Who is more protective?

HE IS… that one text post about saying “that’s my wife” and punching someone. Yeah.

Who remembers the little things?

He does :) Little things she likes, her favorite song or stupid little things she finds funny… sigh

Who uses the cheesier pickup lines?

THE KING but unironically. Some Elvis shit, telling her she got him “all shook up” or something and she’s into it!!!

What does a first date look like for them?

He wouldn’t say this counts (she would) but technically that one time she was doing some random music thing with her freeside kids for fun and he showed up to talk to her and Diana was like. Hey wait, why don’t you stay and sing something for these kids :-) it was stupid but fun I guess and they hung out after, her saying how impressed she was because her kids were having a good time and so was she :)

What do they like to do together?

Like on the (unofficial) first date, doing random performances together. I guess he can sing (I think?? all Elvis impersonators can sing in my mind) and she’s a dancer so.. fun!! Other than that, watching random Kings member #58 perform on their little stage, going to ugly Freeside Casinos and leaving immediately after they lose 3 caps, just fun things!! Also he likes to listen to her talking about random stuff she read in her magazines. 

Do they like PDA?

Fuck yeah… Diana constantly having her legs in his lap whenever possible, him having his arm around her shoulders or on her waist all the time. Physical contact but in a cool way. 

What are their big spoon / little spoon arrangements?

They wouldn’t spoon I think but she’d sleep on his arm :) wakes up and it’s numb but that’s okay

Does one like the cuddle more than the other?

Like I said. constant physical contact (but in a cool way) but actual cuddling WOULD be a thing in private.

Who hogs the blankets?

Diana -_-

Do either of them like to cook?

l can’t imagine him being able to cook but she can. Yes I do the cooking yes I do the cleaning. 

If they get married, who proposes first?

There’s no real proposal probably, It would just come up in a conversation and they’d decide to have one of these quick Las Vegas weddings.

What kind of wedding do they have?

Again. One of these quick Las Vegas weddings… people get married by the King but who marries HIM 😔 (probably one of the other kings). It’s not much but it fits them, I don’t think huge wasteland weddings are much of a thing anyway (or weddings in general) sooo...

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Does anyone object to their relationship? 

No one objected, except maybe annoying ass Pacer for literally no reason and some random followers :/ As for Pippa and Isabel (Diana’s besties), they didn’t meet before she started dating the king so they obviously weren’t rooting for them to get together but they wouldn’t object to it either, I think. Isabel certainly doesn’t, she likes the King and thinks they fit. Idk what Pippa thinks she’s not my oc, but I don’t think she’d object to it either.

Do they have any kids?

NO lmao. No biological ones at least, Diana has her Freeside orphans though that she takes care of (kinda), they’re basically her kids. She even refers to them as such :-)

Do they have any pets?

Heh… Rex :-)

GEORGIE/C*RVO

How did they first meet? What was their first impression of each other?

In the distillery district 😳 On the first mission, Georgie prob caught him sneaking around her clinic (by accident) and was like. WTF get out with your creepy mask… wait ACTUALLY since you’re good at sneaking can you get me [random thing for her medical research that she has tried to get her hands on for ages] and i can give you a discount on health potions and free leeches 😏 NPC behavior… 

Georgie thought the mask looked fucked up and he seemed mysterious but well. She meets strange people every day so 🤷‍♀️ Also she thinks it’s kind of sexy. He thought she was a bit strange, but ig he liked her. She’s funny. 

Who felt romantic feelings first?

GEORGIE. relatively quickly actually, she really likes him early on but she doesn’t really say anything with Jess’ death being so recent :/ He does… later on, about two or three years after dh1, probably when she’s on official business in dunwall tower (YES underqualified royal physician Georgie is a thing now 💕) and she remarks a random cut he has on his cheek & turns his face to get a closer look and he’s like 😳😳😳😳 why do I like that she just did that. Love Wins.

Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Her kind of, again with the whole Jessamine thing because it was so recent and she’s like aaagh i'm not gonna hit on a guy in mourning so she tries to ignore it 😐 

Who initiated the relationship?

GOD technically Georgie, she didn’t say anything of course because she’s too weird but she does kiss him first... and makes him leave right after :/

Who said “I love you” first?

He does… Georgie would NEVER say it first and doesn’t say it right back immediately but. He knows she’s weird about things so it’s okay.

Who gets jealous easily?

Her. That is a thing. 

Who is more protective?

Both :-) 

Who remembers the little things?

Also both but mostly him. Remembering the weird little things she offhandedly mentioned she likes. Or her little plague research things. 

Who uses the cheesier pickup lines?

Both but they’d just whisper them to each other for funsies when they’re somewhere. In public.

What does a first date look like for them?

They wouldn’t have a proper official first date but it’d likely be some random event they’d both be at when she’s the royal physician (I don’t think she’d get invited to anything but well. Maybe the Boyles run out of crazy things to do at their parties and invite her) Or taking a walk at Dunwall’s somewhat nicer-looking docks. Something boring. 

What do they like to do together?

Also boring things. They’re old, nothing too crazy. Chatting about random stuff whenever she’s over at Dunwall tower, taking walks in the gardens together and watching ships or something, talking shit about aristocrats that they find annoying or just about weird hobbies, maybe she can bring him along to meet her friends (who he already knows) to look at rats in alleyways but he eats them idk. Summons a whole swarm of rats but they end up trying to kill them 

Do they like PDA?

NO. I don’t think she’d be too much into the whole ~aristocrat life~ after becoming the royal physician and just does business-related things but neither would want people talking about this. Semi-secret relationship for no reason and they’re both more private sooo

What are their big spoon / little spoon arrangements?

She’s the little spoon.. likes being held :)

Who hogs the blankets?

He does -_-

Do either of them like to cook?

No lol

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Does anyone object to their relationship? 

I think the only person really knowing of this is Marzanna (AGAIN. by dany… Georgie is also besties with Slackjaw… the Rat Smackers. but she wouldn’t tell him about this lol), who would probably not object to it?? but I don’t think anyone else would be rooting for them. I guess Emily likes her as her cool doctor but NO WAY that’s gonna be her stepmom :/

Do they have any kids?

No :/

Do they have any pets?

Georgie has a cat. Not together though, Pluto is hers.

[pellaaearien]

In 2021 we stan people being proud of their accomplishments! post your five (or more) favorite fics that you've ever written and anonymously pass this on to as many of your fav writers as you want. let's begin this new year by showering ourselves and each other with love and pride and good thoughts, we all deserve it!

I got 3 of these anons! Thank you so much :’) <3

Five favourite fics is much more doable. Tough, but doable. I have to keep it to 5 or we’ll be here all day. Let’s see here...

- Hands on Me - In the Beginning

I’m proud of both of these fics for similar reasons - taking Biblical points and playing around with them. I quite like the outcome in both cases.

- Mistaken Identity

I’m proud of this fic because of how I blended the two worlds, pointing out the similarities that might not be immediately obvious.

At that moment, the three of them heard footsteps on the stairs, and Rose watched as Lucifer gravitated towards their owner, demeanour changing completely, night to day. “Detective!” he exclaimed, delighted. The Doctor’s eyebrow arched.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Lucifer,” a female voice with an American accent said from behind them, and Rose turned to see a striking blond woman with the most gorgeous blue eyes she’d ever seen crossing her arms as she stopped just short of them. “I didn’t realize you had company.”

“Oh, never fear, they were just leaving,” Lucifer said at once, jumping almost eagerly to pull out a second glass and pour a shot into both.

“Yup! Don't mind us!” the Doctor agreed, but he didn’t move right away, instead looking intently at Lucifer. “I might’ve guessed,” he said lightly. “What’s that they say about glass houses?”

For the briefest of moments, Lucifer met the Doctor’s eyes and Rose saw the flash of understanding pass between them, these two ancient beings.

- To Hell and Back 

I’m proud of finishing this fic! I’m also very happy with how I described the ‘indescribable’ location of Hell. Some of my favourite writing I’ve ever done. 

As Chloe advanced, one thing soon became abundantly clear; Lucifer hadn’t been kidding when he’d said the funhouse was nothing like Hell.

Hell did not suffer her presence gladly, and the feeling only intensified the further she went. Lucifer often used the phrase ‘hot as Hell’ unironically, but Chloe hardly noticed the temperature. The air was just so close, immense pressure coming from all sides like a living thing. Chloe had lived in LA all her life; she’d never experienced the kind of humidity that made her want to rip her skin off just for a chance of relief.

The sound was worse, or rather, the lack of it. Chloe had thought she’d have to endure the screams of the damned, but instead there was just oppressive silence, like she’d walked into a soundproof room. It pressed in on her like everything else, within and without, and Chloe had the sudden, insane urge to scream, just to see if she still could. She bit her tongue against the impulse and kept walking.

- Something of the Wolf

Finally, I’m proud of this fic for two main reasons: firstly, how I described telepathy (again falling into the ‘indescribable’ category above) but secondly for this passage in particular.

For a moment, Rose had a vision of a series of faces overlaying the Doctor’s, stretching back into the past; by turns boyish and venerable, eccentric and stern, foppish and regal. Yet no matter how different they appeared in each face, the eyes proved that they belonged, absolutely, to the same man. Each were likewise contained within the Doctor’s current face, even that of an impish youngster, whose sharp eyes twinkled out at her from behind the Doctor’s. There was a second set of faces, even more nebulous, that Rose couldn’t make out in any detail except for the eyes, that she thought might be future regenerations. She sucked in a breath, and knew that every face belonged to her.

To my fellow writers: be proud of your work! If you won’t, who will? 

[catubarca]

Harry Potter Next Generation Headcanons

im bored. im full of emotions, and am rly missing the HP world... i just want to write down my headcannons for the next gen kiddos tbh.

please remember these are just my opinions? its okay if yours are different. im just bored and want to share my thoughts,,

Teddy Lupin

his name is Theodore Remus “Teddy” Lupin. it’s just what it is

I don’t care what JKR says, to me his name will always be Theodore

i can’t do this “Edward” stuff im so sorry,,,

h u f f l e p u f f

proper school uniform? never heard of it

messy hair, messy clothes

punk rock child

we’re talking like,,,at least two (2) lip piercings ok

absolutely terrible in herbology. do not leave this child alone in a greenhouse, bad things happen

fuckin hoards chocolate

its a problem

dating Victorie Weasley

random bursts of dancing

keeps a lock of hair pink for his mother

lives with the Potters, enjoys pretending to be Ginny to ground his siblings

“Lily, why aren’t you coming out of your room? Dinner’s ready?” “You said I’m grounded! You tell me!” “What? Oh, for the- THEODORE REMUS LUPIN-“

s m i r k s

effortlessly cool,,, but so so dorky,,, in a cool way

Victorie Weasley

ravenclaw!

looks a lot like her mother, Fleur, but inherited those Weasley freckles

a little confused a lot of the time

absolute sweet tooth (teddy abuses this fact a lot)

Mom Friend™

will help you with your homework

always got a book on her

super beautiful and like,,,, the absolute nicest person,,, but

cannot dance

like at all

adores Charms class

a softie you don’t want to cross

“I’m the oldest”

Dominique Weasley

inherited the Classic Weasley Red Hair™

idolises her Uncle Charlie

“I wanna save animals and work with cool dragons, just like Uncle Charlie does!”

Bill almost has a heart attack

always bringing stray animals home

(“is that a lizard in your pocket, Dominique?” “Yes! His name is Blob.” “You know how your father’s afraid of reptiles, sweetheart, you can’t bring it inside.”)

Gryffindor child

favourite class is definitely Care of Magical Creatures, she and Hagrid like to talk about proper care methods for rare creatures

perpetual dirt stains

BIG middle child vibes

doesn’t really label her sexuality… just kinda does what she wants rly

all the pets in Hogwarts love her

rumours are she’s got an innate, natural magical ability to make them all love her

(she feeds them under the table)

it’s a mystery

big advocate for animal rights

f e m i n i s t

willing to throw hands at all times

usually all smiles though

one of those people who use their whole bodies to laugh

kind of an accidental heartthrob

romcoms

Louis Weasley

looks the most like his mother

ravenclaw

absolutely filled with curiosity. always reading or talking or learning

random facts

(how do you even find that sort of information?

you don’t want to know)

coffee boy

sort of musically talented?

he and James Sirius preach the importance of skincare to all who will listen

secretly full of sass and dry wit

vry graceful and fluid

e y e r o l l

awkward smiles? can never smile properly in photos

on the ravenclaw quidditch team

Ravenclaw Prefect

(“You might be older, but I’m taller.” “Fuck off!”)

only watches High Quality™ tv shows/media

kind of a disaster, despite the gracefulness

Molly Weasley

Classic red hair

comes across as a bit uptight, like her father

I don’t care what you think. (She really cares what you think.)

E y e b r o w s

death glares

drinks like 5 cups of coffee in the morning

studies,,, like a lot

definitely a Gryffindor though

mom jeans

always ready to debate a topic. will destroy opponents.

has been trying to start a successful Debate Club for like 4 years now

naturally falls into the position of a group leader

would be a teacher’s pet, if she wasn’t ready At All Times™ to debate the relevancy of the course syllabus or outdated teaching methods

got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait in Headmistress McGonagall’s office.

(Dumbledore’s portrait was laughing, until she turned and ragged on him for a bit. Minerva thought it was absolutely hilarious, so she just let Molly go at it for a while).

full of rage towards everything, but wears a very careful mask of aloofness

to calm down, she likes painting her nails

she’s very good at it

she’s also very good at painting and art in general, weirdly enough

Lucy Weasley

G R Y F F I N D O R

adores shitty puns and has a terrible sense of humour

brown hair, not red

loves to prank people, which makes her Uncle George very proud

Percy complains about her behaviour, but makes sure he knows he’s proud too

(charming all the cauldrons in the potions classroom to scream whenever they’re stirred takes a more complex understanding of spell work than one would expect).

a pit of a punk streak

rly loves hip hop

high key drama queen

does she ever stop yelling? we’re yet to find out

average grades in terms of theory, but she’s the best in terms of applying information

especially for her pranks

has allies throughout the castle, from the portraits to the students

the bigger the prank, the better

but is a firm believer in “confuse, don’t abuse”

all her pranks are mostly harmless

is a surprising lover of older literature, like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, an influence of her sister

a bit rebellious

Fred Weasley II

name isn’t officially “the second”, but it sounds cooler

James Potter, Lucy Weasley, Molly Weasley and Fred Weasley are like the Marauders 2.0

says “squad” and “lit” unironically

niche humour

hipster vibes

avid music lover

smiley sunshine child

takes after his mother the most in looks, just like his sister

a chill type of gryffindor

plays quidditch, and is an excellent chaser, just like his mother

the absolute undisputed King™ of puppy-dog eyes

just,,,, beautiful

the True teacher’s pet

hands in his work on time,, asks lots of questions,,, likes helping students understand their work,, what a boy

can hella nyoom

runs so fast

look at him go

as you might expect, loves a good prank. always down for a laugh

Roxanne Weasley

Gryffindor and pROUD

absolute Queen tbh

was definitely Head Prefect or Gryffindor Prefect at some point

loved by the school

absolute legend

G I R L   P O W E R

infectious laughter

has a soft spot for Louis Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy

these poor disaster children,,,, they need a Mother

M O M

big mom vibes

mothers the hell out of all the first years

a feminist through and through

can be found nodding aggressively to Molly Weasley’s semi-deranged, furious ranting

YAAAASS

loves slang. uses so much slang. always up to date with trends and memes

has all the gossip

becomes a mess around pretty girls

absolute blushing, stuttering disaster around cute girls oh my god

her eye make-up game is killer

sparkly

Distinguished Lesbian

Rosie Weasley

did someone say Weasley™?

red hair and freckles and curls oh my

on the autism spectrum, has trouble socialising sometimes

hella passionate about stuff

hangs out with Scorpius and Albus, the Golden Trio 2.0

f em ini st

her jokes are the best. high quality sense of humour.

Ravenclaw

likes to read. it’s quiet in the school library, which is nice.

abysmal at herbology

surprisingly good at Care of Magical Creatures though? Animals are just,,, so much easier to deal with

overall, really good grades though

bit of a silent type, but she’s actually a riot to hang out with

actually pretty good at quidditch? She’s not on the team, and she’s not super interested in playing, but?? She’s not bad??

She can land a solid hit with a beater’s bat

(eyes you judgementally over the top of a book)

dry wit humour

will throw hands over chess

Hugo Weasley

hufflepuff

unbeatable at chess, like his dad

a lost puppy

someone please help this child

softie

kind of low-key emotional

so supportive!! and loyal!! high-key best friend material

foodie. loves food. please feed him.

takes a bit more after his dad appearance wise

loves to cook. spends lots of time with grandma Molly and his dad in the kitchen

Professor Longbottom is his favourite professor, because he’s more chilled and laidback.

other professors and classes fill him with Distress™

loves astronomy too

maths whizz, so good at arithmancy

(“uh, actually-“)

a little bossy, like his mother

is trying so hard

maybe a little too hard

a bit insecure and nervous, but so soft

please treat this child carefully and with love

James Sirius Potter

Gryffindor

L O U D

a fucking disaster child

what’d you expect, putting “James” and “Sirius” together?

DRAMATIC GASPING

flails his hands around when he talks

s t r u t s

bisexual mess, had a crush on both the Longbottom children at some point

is better than you at everything

including being a different gender

fuck you that’s why

so pretty

he’s so pretty

is thIS CHILD EVER NOT LAUGHING AT SOMETHING OH My god

laughs at everything

all the time

always

high-key emotional

badly timed finger guns

looks like a model in photos? wtf?

gets invited to Girls Nights™

wears nail polish and makeup

loves to yell at people about gender roles and defying stereotypes

TEA SIS

not on the quidditch team surprisingly enough, even though he’s pretty good

prefers to be in the stands, doing A+ commentary on the games

if he can get Fred to stop mid-air due to unbearable, suffocating laughter at least once a game it’s a win in his books

has it OUT for the hufflepuff quidditch team and no one knows why??

definitely makes puns on his name

it drives everyone insane

harry always replies he’s just making his namesake proud

that also drives everyone insane

smug lil shit

Albus Severus Potter

“It’s just Al.”

S L Y T H E R I N

will always find a way to get what he wants, eventually

“dad, why did you name me this way?”

unimpressed

sigh

hella smart. is topping at least five classes

Aunt Hermione is his favourite. She’s the fucking Mistress of Magic! All that power, the ability to make change and improve the Magical World as a whole-

sass master

the reason headmistress mcgonagall keeps a bottle of scotch under her desk at all times

the only potter child to inherit The Eyes™

absolute insomniac

kind of emo, but turns into a fucking softie around Scorpius Malfoy it’s hilarious

adverse to violence. prefers a verbal beatdown method

really tall? despite having shorties for parents??? no one saw it coming

(especially not Teddy. He’s always scared of losing his last few inches of height)

Functional Gay

he’s on the slytherin quidditch team, as a seeker

Lily Luna Potter

Gryffindor

FEMINIST

do not mess with lily luna potter

she may seem cute and sweet, but she will destroy you

inherited her father’s black hair

disaster lesbian

transfiguration is her favourite subject, by far

has no idea what she wants to do with the rest of her life.

Existential Crisis Father-Daughter Bonding Time™

do you ever sleep?

takes after Ginny the most in personality

also, kind of the most like James Fleamont Potter in personality, too?

Loves to help her brother out with pranks, laughs at him when he gets caught and she gets away with it

The only one of the Potter Children who hasn’t got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait

because she just ignores him instead

loves talking to the portraits around the castle

Super good at Quidditch, is on the team as a Chaser

Quidditch Captain at some point

adores Hagrid, but who out of the Potter children doesn’t?

Idolises Minerva McGonagall

just as oblivious as her father

Scorpius Malfoy

Actually in Ravenclaw, not Slytherin, much to many people’s surprise

abSOLUTE DADDY’S BOY

super close with his dad

Draco is just so supportive of like everything he does (unlike his father)

classic blonde malfoy looks

actually really funny?

a cuddler. loves hugs. always leeching warmth off of someone

he and Rosie sometimes finger-tip-touch which is their version of a hug, because he know’s she’s not super comfortable with touch

was basically adopted by the Weasley’s and Potter’s

James Sirius will murder for this child

booknerd, always rambling to Al and Rosie about new books coming out he’s interested in reading.

has had a crush on Albus Potter since like 1st year

always worried about making his dad proud, and keeping up the Malfoy name

sweet tooth

he’s just,, soft. just a warm, happy child. he wants love, and affection. someone tell him he’s doing okay, please.

needs,,, validation,,,

he’ll tell you out loud that he has no favourite aunts or uncles, but he secretly really likes spending time with his Uncle Ron

they had a talk, once, in like the middle of the night at a sleepover with Rosie and Al, about feeling insecure in comparison to others, and learning to be proud of yourself for your achievements

there were a few tears, but it was nice

Ron was actually the third person he told, besides his dad and Rosie, about having a crush on Al

openly a disaster romantic. trash taste in romance novels.

always welcome in the Potter-Weasley households

[felix-eternal-sunshine-fanfic]

You can be my Fiona, I’ll be your Shrek. - A Changbin/Shrek Fanfiction

Previous part: -here-

- No smut, no romance

Chapter Three

‘Are you being serious with me?’ ‘Yes. I don’t know how he got there, but he has been asking for my help to get him out of there.’ ‘Hmmm… How do I phrase this? Are you sure he’s not... dead?’ ‘No. I don’t think he’s dead’, Felix sounded sad. ‘Or at least I don’t want to think that.’ ‘Sorry, sorry. I didn’t want to make you sad. So, I’m assuming he’s missing?’ ‘Yeah. He has been missing for four days now. He doesn’t answer the phone and isn’t coming home. We’ve filed a missing person report, but we haven’t heard anything yet.’ ‘I don’t think you’re lying about him communicating with you via your dreams.’ The woman was still lying on the floor, so the psychic turned to her and said, ‘You can go home for now. I’m sorry, but this matter seems to be more important. We’ll continue another time.’ The woman sighed, got up and left. ‘Now; I’ll unfortunately have to do research into this matter. That means you’ll have to give me a few days.’ The psychic took a business card out of his pocket and explained, ‘Here’s my name and my phone number. Please call me if you learn anything new. It’d be nice if you called me after your friend communicated with me too. We’ll need all the information we can get.’ Felix took the business card. It was in a shade of lavender and looked quite fancy. ‘Jeonghan Yoon ₁₉’, Felix read the name on the business card quietly. He looked up into Jeonghan’s face. ‘He’s very beautiful. I didn’t notice that before.’ Felix blushed and stopped staring at Jeonghan, finally.

He arrived at home. ‘You’re back!’, Chan greeted him with a cup of coffee in his hand. ‘Where were you anyway?’ ‘I just went for a walk’, Felix didn’t tell him the truth since he didn’t know if he’d believe him. Chan raised his eyebrows. He decided to not ask more, ‘Alright. There’s food in the fridge if you’re hungry.’ Chan took a sip of his coffee and thought, ‘Ah… to be young and in love.’ He wasn’t even that old, but all the other members (especially I.N) would always make jokes about him being old, so Chan started to actually feel old. He got it all wrong anyways. Felix wasn’t meeting up with someone he loved. ₂₀

‘I’m tired’, Felix thought just as Lee Know burst into the room. ‘Hear me out guys. Changbin appeared in my dream. He pissed me off!’ ‘Wait. Wait. Wait. Something’s wrong here. Changbin appeared in Lee Know’s dream? Was it because I was away and Lee Know was sleeping?’ Chan looked at Felix and thought, ‘Didn’t he experience something like that too? What is going on here?’ ‘Hey Felix…’ Felix just stared wide eyed.

₁₉Author’s note: Jeonghan from Seventeen is making a cameo! 😊 I unironically like Jeonghan and Seventeen (I don’t really stan them, but I do enjoy their music) and since I needed a name for the psychic, I decided to just give that role to Jeonghan.

₂₀Jeonghan x Felix fanfic coming soon. I’m joking obviously. There’s literally no reason to ship them. They probably never even met or just barely know each other lol

In Shrek’s world:

Changbin woke up. ‘What…’ Something seemed off. He was high up somewhere. He looked down, ‘Why is it moving? Where am I anyway?’ ‘Are you awake?’ He heard Alice voice coming from somewhere above him. It was loud. He looked up and got surprised, ‘What the…’ ‘Hey, it’s just me. I decided that the easiest way to carry you, would be to shrink you.’ ‘Shrink me?’ It made sense now. Changbin was small and Alice was carrying him on her hands. ‘Wow… but can you turn me back to normal now? I got some rest and can walk on my own now.’ ‘If you say so’, Alice said and placed Changbin on the ground. She closed her eyes and whispered a spell. Changbin felt warm and lost consciousness for a brief moment. He looked down. ‘My own two legs again…’ ‘Here we go’, Alice said and started walking again. Changbin followed her. ‘I don’t mean to sound annoying or something, but shouldn’t we be close enough by now?’ Changbin asked after a bit of walking. ‘First of all: You are always annoying. Secondly, we’ll walk until we reach the next clearing in the forest. I’ll try to teleport us then.’ Changbin had to admit that he relied on Alice a lot. He didn’t know what he’d do without her. ‘What’s Alice for me? A friend… or maybe a guide. I’m happy that I’ve met her’, Changbin thought and smiled. ‘You see that clearing there? That’s where we’ll take a break and try teleporting’, Alice pointed to some trees; maybe 20 meters away from them. Changbin’s tummy rumbled. ‘I could really go for something to eat. I’m hungry.’ Changbin frowned. They arrived at the forest clearing. ‘Hey… I’m like, really hungry; Could you give me something to eat?’ ‘I’m hungry too. Let’s have a picnic.’ Alice smiled and let a nice picnic blanket appear together with a basket full of food. There were sandwiches, fruit, cucumbers and salad, and even some drinks like orange juice and wine. ‘Wine? I don’t drink…’ ‘I do’, Alice said and downed a glass of wine. She smiled at Changbin. ‘Please, please; help yourself. You don’t need to hold back! Eat and drink as much as you like. Remember: I can always get us more.’ ‘Thank you’, Changbin answered and took a bite out of a sandwich. It was really good!

Ten sandwiches and six glasses of orange juice later and Changbin laid flat on the floor. ‘I think I ate too much.’ Changbin burped loudly. ‘I think I drank too much’, Alice said and laughed. She was drunk out of her mind. They didn’t try to teleport like they originally intended. Both fell asleep.

In the real world:

Jeonghan was stressed. How could something like that happen? He had dedicated his whole life to spiritualism. He was the most skilled and knowledgeable psychic when it came to different dimensions. The most knowledgeable in all of Seoul! No; maybe in all of South Korea! This was his chance! His chance to make big business! He could make everyone believe in him. Everyone would follow him. That’s why he needed to solve this case so bad. He went through all his notes and all his books. The room was a mess: Papers and books laid on the floor and Jeonghan was right in the middle of this chaos. ‘Where was it, where was it?’ Jeonghan was frantically talking to himself while browsing in a book. ‘I found it!’

There were numerous reports of people being ‘sucked into’ different worlds. Unfortunately, we were not able to rescue most of them. The few that were rescued, showed clear signs of insanity.

The book was quite old. Jeonghan remembered, that he had picked it up at a garage sale. ‘That’s strange. So, it seems that this is no new phenomenon. But why haven’t I heard more about it? Something like that would normally cause an uproar, wouldn’t it?’ Turns out, it was widely assumed that the people went missing and died. The people that claimed to be communicating with the missing people were often send to an asylum. ‘But this book also states that a few people were rescued… I need to know how. But I’m worried “showed clear signs of insanity” … Could it be too late already?’ ‘I need to find more information. I can’t leave them like that’, Jeonghan said out loud. He began looking through all the books and browsing through all the lose papers again.

It was getting dark outside. Jeonghan had searched the whole day. He hadn’t even eaten anything. He was hungry and tired, but he didn’t want to give up. Not yet- so his body forced him to rest. He collapsed in the chaos of scattered papers and open books.

Felix felt weird. He felt like something happened, but he didn’t know what. ‘It’s probably nothing…’ He had avoided the situation after he came home yesterday. He had gone to his room before anyone could have asked him about it. He was scared that his own friends might think he’s nuts. ‘This feeling… Will I communicate with Changbin again? Maybe I should go to bed…’ He didn’t know what to do anyways, so he just went to bed.

Felix’s dream:

‘Felix?’ ‘Yes. It’s me.’ ‘Why am I here? I didn’t even plan to fall asleep.’ ‘So you have to sleep too?’ ‘Yeah. Have you found anything out?’ ‘I went to a psychic yesterday, but he said he needed time to do research.’ ‘Well, we didn’t want to sit around doing nothing. We were on our way to ask Shrek for help.’ ‘Wait. Slow down a second; We? Shrek? I don’t think you’ve told me everything.’ ‘It seems I’m trapped in the world of Shrek. It’s exactly like the movies here. I should have mentioned that earlier, right? And I’m not alone. I’m with someone named Alice. She apparently got stuck here too.’ ‘What? Why didn’t you tell me that before?’

Felix woke up. ‘Why is it always so short? I don’t even have time to talk with him that much…’ He just laid on his bed before he remembered, ‘Jeonghan! Shouldn’t I call him? It’s late… but I can’t risk forgetting it.’ Felix took his phone and the business card and dialled the number.

Jeonghan’s phone rang. It was laying next to him on the floor. It woke him up. He reached for the phone and answered, ‘Hello?’ ‘It’s me, Felix. I’m the person whose friend is stuck in another dimension. Remember?’ ‘Yeah. I remember.’ Jeonghan’s eyes widened in shock. ‘How much time has passed?’ ‘Uh… What? Since I’ve talked to you? That was yesterday.’ Jeonghan was relieved. ‘So, why did you call me Felix?’ ‘I communicated with Changbin, that’s my friends name by the way.’ ‘What did Changbin tell you?’ ‘He’s apparently trapped in the world of Shrek. You know, Shrek; the movie character.’ ‘I know who Shrek is. But for real? Is he really trapped in Shrek’s world? How would that even work?’ ‘I don’t know. That’s what he said. He also said that he isn’t alone. Someone called “Alice” is with him. She apparently got stuck in that world too…’ ‘Someone else is stuck in Shrek’s world too?’ ‘Yes. Have you figured anything out?’ ‘I’m sorry, but the only thing I have learned yet, is that this doesn’t seem to be a new thing. I read a report in an old book; apparently there were people who got stuck in another dimension. Most of them couldn’t be rescued, but those who were, seemed to be insane. Additionality, there were people who said that they could communicate with the trapped people.’ ‘You don’t have to worry about not being able to figure out more than this. This is a great starting point, I think. Makes me a little worried though…’ ‘Me too. I feel that we don’t have much time to rescue Changbin and his friend, Alice.’ ‘Yeah. But please don’t overwork yourself…’ ‘H-Huh?’ Jeonghan was embarrassed, but glad at the same time. It feels nice to know that someone cares about you.

[kurowrites]

Snow - Chapter 4

Entire fic. AO3.

I’ve officially given up.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Please note the “Mature” rating of this fic!

---

Wei Ying wakes up slowly. He’s warm and comfy, and he vaguely remembers that today is Saturday, so there’s no need to hurry and get out of bed. He has time.

As he lies there, he slowly becomes aware of the presence of another person right next to him. It’s the reason he’s feeling so nice and toasty.

Oh. He remembers now. Lan Zhan stayed last night.

He opens his eyes, and there he is. Lan Zhan, still in Wei Ying’s band shirt, his arm still wrapped around Wei Ying’s waist. It’s a glorious way to wake up – a glorious sight to wake up to. Wei Ying finds himself smiling without intending to.

“Hey,” he says, his voice still a little scratchy with sleep.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan replies, and Wei Ying’s heart flutters. He thinks he likes the way Lan Zhan says his name.

He doesn’t feel feverish or sick anymore, and since he seems perfectly healthy again, he feels a little playful. Lan Zhan is right here, after all, in Wei Ying’s bed, and he looks soft and open and very touchable. He would dare anyone not to touch Lan Zhan looking like this, and watch how long they’re able to resist. But then, he doesn’t want anyone else to touch Lan Zhan, so there’s that.

Wei Ying turns the rational part of his brain off and goes on a little discovery tour. It starts innocent enough, with Wei Ying’s hands tracing Lan Zhan’s beautiful features and chest. His skin is soft, unlike some of the rough men of Wei Ying’s acquaintance who think their masculinity will die a violent death if they come into contact with moisturizing cream.

Lan Zhan doesn’t object his exploration. Only once does he stop Wei Ying when he tries to tickle Lan Zhan. He doesn’t even have the decency to squirm. He simply takes hold of Wei Ying’s hand, sends him a look, and says “Wei Ying” in that strict voice of his.

“Sorry, sorry,” Wei Ying apologises with a small laugh, and returns to his former exploration.

He takes his time, but he does have a goal in mind, so bit by bit, he lets his hands wander lower until they scrape over the waistband of Lan Zhan’s underwear. He lets them move lower still, trails them over the fabric until they find the outline of Lan Zhan’s private parts. He traces the shape of them through the fabric of the underwear, and though Lan Zhan makes no sound, it’s quite clear that the lower part of his body is interested in the proceedings.

Well, Wei Ying is interested, too. He’s interested in Lan Zhan’s everything. As he gently takes hold of Lan Zhan’s penis and rubs it softly, still through the fabric of the underwear, he squirms a little because he’s getting excited himself. There’s something illicit about handling Lan Zhan like that, and he’s unironically loving it. He wants to touch Lan Zhan, and he wants to be touched in return. He usually doesn’t go around wanting to stick his hands into other men’s pants, but Lan Zhan has burned through any reason and restraint he might have had at some point pretty quickly and very thoroughly.  

When he tries to slip his hand into Lan Zhan’s waistband, Lan Zhan’s own hand wraps around his and keeps him in place.

“Wei Ying,” he says again, and it’s clear that it’s a warning.

“Come on, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying whines, leaning in to give Lan Zhan little licking kisses. “Are you really going to waste your chance to fuck me into my mattress on this beautiful morning?”

Lan Zhan’s hold loosens a little, and Wei Ying doesn’t waste any time to slip his hand into Lan Zhan’s boxer briefs to stroke the base of his penis. Lan Zhan is definitely erect now, Wei Ying notes with satisfaction.

“I’m willing, I want it, what more do you need? A personal, written invitation? You are cordially invited to defile Wei Ying in whatever manner you deem appropriate, please hasten to my side and debauch me thoroughly.”

He laughs and kisses whatever parts of Lan Zhan’s face he can reach.

He almost fears Lan Zhan will push him away any second now, that he’s gone too far this time, but instead, Lan Zhan rises, turns Wei Ying around until he’s lying on his back, and settles over Wei Ying. His long hair falls over his shoulders, and he looks beautiful like that too. A little predatory, just enough that it goes straight to Wei Ying’s cock. With a quick motion, Lan Zhan slips out of Wei Ying’s band shirt and throws it away. Wei Ying’s hands automatically come up to touch the exposed skin. My, Lan Zhan truly is glorious.

Lan Zhan’s own hands find the buttons on Wei Ying’s pyjamas, and he carefully opens them one by one until Wei Ying’s chest is exposed, too. He lets his hands slide over Wei Ying’s torso, further down, and hooks his fingers into the band of his pyjama bottoms and underwear. He pauses there for one moment and sends Wei Ying a look. Wei Ying obediently raises his hips because he has absolutely no objection to getting stripped naked by Lan Zhan, and with one swoop movement, Lan Zhan divests Wei Ying of the rest of his clothing.

Just having Lan Zhan’s eyes on his now exposed body excites Wei Ying; he’s pretty sure his cock is already leaking just from that.

“Off, off,” he commands, and tries to snag Lan Zhan’s boxers.

Luckily, Lan Zhan understands exactly what he wants, and his underwear is gone the next moment. Lan Zhan in his entire, impossible, naked glory hovers above him, and Wei Ying is really, really glad he took that gamble and let Lan Zhan into his apartment. He definitely wants to get fucked into the mattress by this man.

Lan Zhan’s thoughts seem to line up with his perfectly, because the next moment, he takes Wei Ying’s legs and guides them so they can wrap around Lan Zhan’s middle. He sinks down until their cocks are touching each other (Wei Ying might go a little crazy at this point), and once he finds a comfortable position, he reaches for one of Wei Ying’s hands. He rubs a little of Wei Ying’s own precum into Wei Ying’s hand and wraps it around them both, making it obvious what he wants Wei Ying to do.

That’s fine. It’s excellent. Wei Ying smears his own precum on them both, which is both a little disgusting and also hot, and strokes them both because he just can’t resist, can’t help but want to explore Lan Zhan’s reaction, to push him a little.

Oh shit, that feels amazing. The added heat and sensation of another body makes this an altogether different animal from masturbating on his own. He almost regrets not trying this out earlier, but then, there was no Lan Zhan in his life until now, so it’s a rather moot point.

Lan Zhan’s arms find their way to both sides of Wei Ying, and as he hovers over Wei Ying like that, gazing at him with burning eyes, he starts to undulate his hips. It starts very slow and gentle, just enough movement to confirm that it feels good, that Wei Ying’s hold on them is working for both.

Wei Ying moans a little bit, because yeah, that feels pretty fucking good already. Lan Zhan, apparently encouraged by the noise, starts moving a little faster, letting his weight rest on Wei Ying a little more, pressing him further and further into the mattress, pushing him down exactly the way Wei Ying wants him to, making a mess of him.

He feels so much more stimulated by everything – the feel of Lan Zhan’s body, the movement, the smell, the way Lan Zhan’s breathing is growing more ragged by the minute, the way he looks down at Wei Ying with blazing eyes – that Wei Ying is sure he can’t take it for very long.

But Lan Zhan seems to be in the same predicament. He suddenly makes a strangled noise and pushes down hard on Wei Ying, pumping frantically, and all Wei Ying can do is squeeze and writhe to give that little bit of additional stimulation that’s needed.

Within seconds, he’s coming himself.

When the fog in his mind clears, his stomach is sticky with fluid all over, and Lan Zhan is breathing heavily into Wei Ying’s shoulder, just barely keeping himself from collapsing onto Wei Ying’s body.

Fuck, that was good. He can’t even loosen the legs he has still wrapped around Lan Zhan.

“That was really good,” he says out loud, because he feels such things have to be communicated.

Lan Zhan turns his head and gives him a languorous, drawn out kiss. Wei Ying decides that it’s his way of telling him that he liked it, too.

Before long, the position they’re in gets uncomfortable, and they have to move. Lan Zhan sits up and helps Wei Ying get up, as well, though he’s feeling a little wobbly. He then finds himself shuffled into the bathroom by Lan Zhan.

Here is where Wei Ying goes a little insane: yesterday, he imagined Lan Zhan wiping him down with a terrycloth. It was fantasy, one of these things that you think about with a little longing in your heart, but that are entirely divorced from reality. Like having a celebrity crush. So when Lan Zhan actually digs out a terrycloth towel, wets it, and starts wiping away the mess on Wei Ying’s stomach, Wei Ying thinks he can’t be blames if it makes him a little weak. Fantasies such as these should not become reality so easily. Lan Zhan shouldn’t be so effortlessly good at taking care of him. He has to lean forward and kiss Lan Zhan several times, because he feels he might explode if he doesn’t. These terrible, mushy feelings have to go somewhere.

Eventually, Wei Ying manages to stop kissing Lan Zhan for long enough they both succeed in finishing their clean-up, and they return to the bedroom to get dressed. Lan Zhan has to borrow a pair of Wei Ying’s boxer briefs because his are kind of destroyed, and Wei Ying laughs at him and teases him by giving him his fancy red ones.

They eat breakfast – prepared by Lan Zhan, of course – and because Wei Ying is feeling better, he kind of wants to go out for a little bit. He convinces Lan Zhan that yes, he wants to take a walk with Wei Ying in the nearby park, and maybe swing by the department store next to it on their way back. The storm from two days ago has long abated, and the snow outside glitters magically in the sunlight. It’s the perfect time for a walk.

Lan Zhan slips into his long, white coat and Wei Ying grabs his leather jacket by necessity – he has no other option – but before he can head to the door, Lan Zhan stops him and wraps a red scarf around Wei Ying’s neck. Wei Ying touches the material with surprise. He’s not really familiar with products like this, but it has to be something expensive like merino wool. He has never touched wool as soft as this scarf. And the red is beautiful!

He opens his mouth to say thank you, but catches himself in time. Indeed, Lan Zhan doesn’t want his thanks. So instead, he pulls Lan Zhan down by the lapels of his coat and gives him a thorough kiss.

Yep, he thinks, satisfied as he lets go and licks his lips. That hit the spot.

Lan Zhan adjusts the scarf, making sure that Wei Ying is all wrapped up properly, and ushers him out the door.