#sorry anon you said any characters and I truly went for some weird picks

[ticenchantedtoc]

3 for the holiday fic stuff? Any characters you wanna use is fine :3

It had been Belle's idea. Something her family used to do when the roads were buried under snow and the award money never came.

In the castle, though, it was simply convenient. Belle had gathered everyone in the ballroom, which was still a mess in preparation for their usual, ostentatious Christmas gala. The tree sat empty, and the floor was littered with loose pine needles and golden glitter. Dusty boxes of ornaments and candles were piled anywhere there was room, in some method of "organization" that only made sense to Angelique. Belle made a seat for herself atop an old cedar trunk, sending another puff of dust onto the once-polished floor. She barely suppressed a giggle at the way Cogsworth's nose scrunched up.

The names were shuffled in an empty box for the garland, scraps of tinsel and evergreen tossed with them. Everyone walked out with a folded scrap of paper and the promise that someone had theirs in turn.

Everyone except Fife.

He hadn't come to the ballroom. In fact, Madame de Garderobe could not recall the last time she saw the boy at all.

"We should do something for him."

Her husband glanced up to her with a blink, as if he hadn't seen her at all. His pen had stilled so abruptly that a blot of ink bled into the page. A soft smile graced her face. "Apologies, mi amore, I did not mean to interrupt you."

In an instant, and for no discernable reason, Cadenza suddenly noticed the growing dot of ink beneath his hand. He frantically tried to smudge it out with his thumb, which only made the mess worse. His face fell into his hands. "Yes, mi stella?"

Garderobe pulled a handkerchief from his coat pocket to dry the black stain now on his cheek. With a cheeky grin, she whispered, "My sincerest apologies for disrupting a genius at work."

He crumpled up the paper with a huff. "Nonsense, all I've written is nonsense!"

"I'm sure that's not true."

"How am I supposed to appeal to the prince? He has been famously been difficult all his life, and if that wasn't challenging enough, now he's a different man entirely!"

"And I'm certain the most talented composer in all of Europe can make something perfect for him."

Cadenza tossed the paper ball into a corner, the newest addition to a white, crinkly mountain of ideas that would certainly be brilliant to anyone else. But not Cadenza. Temperamental, perfectionist Cadenza with too many ideas and too little patience.

Garderobe chuckled more as she leaned down to kiss his cheek. "Now that I have your attention, I have a little request. The little flautist, we should do something for him."

"Mi amore, we barely know him!"

"But we do!" she insisted brightly. "We share an art, darling; that is more than enough!"

Cadenza shook his head. "Oh, if you insist."

So their search began. Cadenza asked as much of the staff as he could, but not even Lumiere knew a thing about the boy.

"He is— Well, you know, he keeps to himself."

"He rarely spoke to anyone but the Maestro. Quite flighty, as it were."

"He's an odd little tyke. I've tried talking to him some, but he always avoids us."

None of it sat well with the diva. Especially when she knew—or rather, had known—Maestro Forte many years ago. He had always been a bitter, reclusive man, and she could not bear to see sweet Fife become the same.

It didn't matter that she didn't know him. Madame de Garderobe had never been the type for small things. On the stage and in her behind-the-scenes life, she would love with her whole heart, sing until her throat was raw, throw herself into anything if passion swayed her so.

And suddenly, she knew what to do.

"Mi amore, what was the name of that carpenter in Villeneuve?"

"Firmin, I believe."

"Thank you, dear!"

Cadenza shook his head as she disappeared out the door, her thick skirts following a few seconds later. There was no use arguing with his wife when she set her mind to something, but that was also one of the things he loved about her.

She poked her head back into the room. "And the seamstress?"

"I don't know," he chuckled. "Why don't you ask Belle?"

"That's brilliant! Thank you, love!"

She was gone again before he could answer, and thus Cadenza remained tucked away with only his harpsichord as company. Hours slipped between the keys as he wrote and rewrote and wrote and rewrote... His hands seemed to move on their own as his mind followed the road through the forest, all but invisible beneath the snow. He thought of Garderobe in Villeneuve, shining like a Christmas star in all her jewels and silks and beauty. And above all else... her joy.

Cadenza looked back to his sheet music with a smile. He had nothing to worry about. Tomorrow, the gifts would be exchanged, and there would be laughter in the ballroom, and none of his stresses mattered because there would be joy.

[theepisceswriter]

Doing dirty things w/ AOT characters while you two most definitely shouldn’t be (Reiner, Erwin, Zeke, Levi)

A/N: my faithful stoned thot anon, shoutout to you for this request and I hope this was something like you were imagining in your mind. I know you only asked for simple mundane tasks, but I wanted to be extra and include more situations. I can’t wait to work on the other ones you sent me !

Synopsis: Basically, you’re trying to do a task that requires a lot of your attention or you to be silent (like on the phone, out to eat with friends, etc), but your partner really really needs some attention in that moment. I suck at descriptions sorry 🥴 If you see any typos no u didn’t, but really I was too lazy to proofread.

TW: Modern AU, hehe naughtiness obviously, choking for Zeke, also embarrassment, fembodied!reader, 18+, MINORS DNI!

REINER BRAUN: Movie night with friends

Reiner just couldn’t help himself, he really couldn’t. The first sight of you in your silky pajama shorts and this man’s thoughts were going crazy watching you parade around the house as you grabbed the snacks and needed materials for tonight’s movie night with some of you guys’ friends. Luckily the fabric of his pajama pants were loose enough to hide the growing boner in his pants, but of course he made it known to you by approaching you from behind and pressing it against your ass so you could feel just how hard you had made him simply by looking pretty.

His hands began to roam all over your body, stealing a grope of your breast, and his mouth attached to your neck, taking breaks in between kisses to tell you how good you look and how much you riled him up. As good as it all felt, Pieck and Porco were only right down the street, so you took his hands off of your body with promises of making him feel better later in the night once they had left. You’re lucky he doesn’t like quickies like that and prefers to take his time with you or else he would’ve taken you right there up against that counter chile.

Pieck and Porco finally arrive and what was supposed only be one movie turned into two, and now here you were snuggled up under Reiner on a completely different couch than Porco and Pieck while they flipped through a catalogue on the television looking for a new movie to start up; Reiner growing more and more impatient as the minutes went on. The constant caressing on your thigh and pinches he would give your nipples every now and then giving that away completely.

You got tired of fighting his advances off a long time ago and part of you wanted him to continue, to see how far he would actually go, because truth is you wanted him just as much as he wanted you right now. You were just a lot better at hiding it.

It was halfway through the movie that he finally decides to make a drastic move, moving you to a position where your back was pressed against his chest and tapping your hips, signifying for you to raise them so he could pull your shorts down to your thighs.

“Sit still for the rest of the night and I’ll reward us both so good once they leave.” He’d whisper in your ear. The only warning you’d get before he’s slowly easing his cock into you careful not to stretch you out too much, but the wetness that accumulated between your legs all night long makes it so you swallow him completely. A shocked moan leaving both of your lips, but luckily being silenced by the action scene on the tv; both Porco and Pieck too into it to even pay attention to the two of you.

So desperately you wanted to swirl your hips up against you, create any sort of friction to make his cock hit that spot in your soft velvety walls that left you clenching and squealing and him growling into your ears, but instead you had to be as still as possible while cockwarming him. Not being too careful would surely draw the attention of the other two, but Reiner still tested the waters every now and then by shifting every so often on purpose to cause movement.

He was even able to draw a weird moan out of you once that had Porco and Pieck looking over at you like you were crazy, questioning if you were okay which you had no choice but to reply yes to. Barely able to get that out because the feeling of his cock throbbing inside of you mixed with your walls clenching around him was a whole sensation on its own.

“Careful, you don’t want them knowing that I’m balls deep in you right now would you? Or would a slut like you enjoy that; them knowing that your pussy is swallowing my cock whole right now?”

Reiner is degrading during sex sometimes and you cannot tell me otherwise #sorrynotsorry.

And when he said the two of you would be staying like this the whole night until they left he absolutely meant it. After that little moaning incident he surprisingly acted normal the whole night, like the two of you weren’t even doing what you were doing underneath the cover. Knowing how torturous it must be for him to deny you the skin to skin contact and hip bucking you needed from him.

ERWIN SMITH: In a restaurant surrounded by friends

You never thought Erwin to be the bold type to try something out in public with you. The closest thing the two of you have done to it was a quick quickie in his office once with you pressed against the window of the skyscraper building it was located in, but even then you could feel the anxiety in his muscles as he pressed himself up against you; scared of an assistant or important business partner to come barging in on the two of you.

So you can imagine the shock on your face when you were spending the night out with friends at a restaurant, preoccupied with listening to Levi’s horror stories at his tea shop when you felt the ghostly tingles of Erwin’s fingers trail up on your thigh. A hand on your knee was nothing, something he had done plenty of times as a small sign of PDA, but this was different. You looked over to him with a questioned look in your eyes, but his kept his eyes straight and responded to you physically by pressing his thumb against the cloth that separated his finger from your clit.

Almost immediately you choked on the spit going down your throat which garnered the attention from everyone else at the table asking if you were alright. Everyone but Erwin turned to you and if they were truly paying attention that would’ve been a major sign that something was up, but your quick, “I’m okay!” Response had them off your back in an instance and only edged Erwin on more, fingers pushing your panties to the side as he continued on.

The food in front of you hadn’t been touched in around 10 mins since you found yourself full before you were able to finish it all, but you had to pick up your fork and abruptly take a bite of of it when you felt Erwin’s long fingers plunge into you with ease from your wetness and curl up into you; the metal between your teeth the best attempt you had at covering up your moans.

You swear you saw a slight smirk on his lips when you glanced over at him because he’s a menace to society like that.

His hands moved so languidly inside of you hitting all the right spots and pressing down on the sensitive parts of you that always guaranteed a reaction out of you. While also simultaneously still rubbing your clit with his thumb in wide circles, enjoying every twist and turn he saw your face do as you tried desperately to hold your moans in.

At one point, to mess with you even more, he leaned in and whispered into your ear, “You think all these people know that your cunt is clenching around my fingers about to cum?” No one else heard him but you, but it definitely drew the attention of Levi who threw a confused look your way. To which you could only reply to with a smile and awkward chuckle that almost broke out into a moan because Erwin thought it would be a good idea to speed up his fingers.

You didn’t care how obvious it looked anymore, your teeth found comfort in the skin of his arm to stifle moans and your fingers had a death grip on his thighs as your orgasm hit you like a wave. Leaving you with nothing to do but grind your hips down into his fingers slowly to not draw attention as you rode out his orgasm. His fingers were covered in your slick as he pulled them off of you and instead of being discreet and wiping them on his pants or even your dress, he picked up a small dessert off his plate and turned to you. Feeding it to you and sticking his fingers a little too far in your mouth so you can clean your own orgasm off of your fingers. His thumb going between his own lips once he took his fingers out of your mouth and sucking on it gently. “That was delicious.” He would state, never breaking eye contact with you.

The tent in his dressy slacks gave away all the excitement he was feeling on the inside as he watched you squirm in your seat while he did something so naughty to you in public. He couldn’t take it anymore, placing his share of the bill on the table and excusing the both of you for the night before going around and saying your goodbyes. No one seemed to notice anything, except for when you went to Levi to give him a goodbye hug and he whispered in your ear, “Next time get a room or go to the bathroom you freaks.” You totally weren’t embarrassed and didn’t leave the restaurant with warm cheeks.

ZEKE JAEGER: During a zoom meeting

First off, sexy time stuff aside, Zeke is a menace to society and always interrupting your zooms. Whether it’s him barging into the room and asking a question like “Did you eat the last bagel?” While you’re unmuted or walking behind you with his shirt off while you have you camera on. You will never know a peaceful smooth sailing zoom meeting with Zeke in the house.

But you were immune to it at this point and he was a little too immune and comfortable with messing with you while you were in them. But hey, you couldn’t blame him! You looked all too good to him while you laid in the bed on your stomach in one of his band tees and nothing else while you payed attention to the boring lecture happening on your laptop.

Once he realized that your camera was off his hands were on you immediately, rubbing up and down your legs to signify to you that he was in a mood while he made his way on the bed behind you.

“You can’t just be walking around the house all sexy like this and expect me not to pounce on you.”

You want to say something snarky and remarkable back, but a distraction from your boring ass class is exactly what you needed. So instead of protesting this time around, you arched your back so your ass was nearly up to his face to which he replied with playfully slapping you on it and even taking a nibble of your cheek. And because you’re a menace to society you run your own hand along your clothed slit and moving your panties out of the way to put it on display for him.

“I could really use some distracting right now.” Say less, this man’s mouth is on your clit in an instant, devouring you like you’re his first meal of the day. Your hips instinctively grinding down against his tongue as he moved his focus to sucking on your clit at a pace that left you ass up face down on the bed moaning like a pornstar. Never mind his beard scraping against your thighs and possibly leaving a rash there later for you to deal with. It adds a nice touch of pain to your pleasure.

So caught up into the pleasure warming up your lower stomach, you don’t even notice your teacher calling on you until Zeke reaches out and taps on the keyboard to move your attention back to the zoom in front of you, his mouth still working magic on your clit; a mixture of his spit and your juices trailing down his chin. The site is enough to make you cum but you’re forced to divert your eyes away from it as you unmute yourself, quickly asking her to repeat the question, going back on mute before they can hear the slurping noises that Zeke obnoxiously made louder once you unmuted.

“I’m going to kill you.” “Pay attention to school sweetheart before I stop completely. Education comes first!” What an asshole, but despite the joking tone of his voice you know he’d stop in a heartbeat just to mess with you and you’re too close to an orgasm for him to up and quit like that.

From the way your hips move sloppily against his face he can tell that you’re close, but once the teacher repeats the question at you to answer he pulls away completely seemingly to cut you some slack. But, surprise, he only moves his mouth away to replace it with his cock, sliding into you with ease and thrusting into you at a steady pace that has you moan loudly into the microphone on accident.

His face lights up with a smug expression and smile, the embarrassment on your cheeks making him pick up his pace and turning him on in a way. “Now your whole class is going to know that you were getting fucked by me. Too busy getting your hole pounded to even pay attention to the lesion. What a dirty little slut, they’re probably talking about you right now as we speak.”

You’re at a loss of words, not only because of embarrassment but because you can barely form a sentence from the way Zeke is pounding into you so ruthlessly from behind. His hand even coming forward and grabbing at your neck to balance himself against the bed while on his knees.

Your morning with him is far from over and the embarrassment from this zoom is going to last with you forever.

LEVI ACKERMAN:  On an important phone call

I know Levi Ackerman with his hands around our necks really get us going and the thought of dom him fucking us from behind while on the phone with our boss  makes us feel butterflies in our stomachs....BUT the thought of sub Levi whimpering and having to put his phone on mute while discussing business with someone because you have his cock halfway down your throat, is an equally as hot image.

He would glance at you from over his phone and let out a silent “What are you doing?” And make a faint shooing away motion in the air to make you leave, but he doesn’t want you to leave. You know that and he knows that which is why when you went to unbuckle his pants he gladly let you, hips even raising slightly so you can pull them down enough to let his cock and balls free from the restraints of his underwear and pants.

It was such a sudden and rash decision on your end that he wasn’t even hard at all when you pulled him out, but one lick from the base of his cock to the tip of it is enough to make it stand tall. Warranting a deep intake of air that has the person on the other end of the line asking if he was okay. Between the embarrassment from nearly being caught and the pleasure exploding in his lower half from how good you’re working your mouth, his cheeks are flushed with a bright pink color.

“Do you want me to stop” “no, no, keep going, please.”

He’s so needy and close to that sweet release already, the excitement from doing something so naughty while the person on the other end of the phone has no idea has his senses in an overload. Even the broken ‘Y-Yes’s that have to leave his lips every time he unmutes his phone strikes an excited nerve in him that he didn’t know he had; wishing he could moan as freely as he could to show off how good you make him feel, but he bites back those moans with his teeth. Instead opting for a number of praises when he can.

“You look so pretty on your knees in front of me with your cock in my mouth.” “You make me feel so so good, you don’t even know how good I feel right now because of you.” “Keep that up and I’m going to cum.”

Eyes closing shut and breath picking up the closer he gets. His hand even coming down to move your head at a pace that feels godly around his cock.

Usually you would tease and pull away altogether when he did this, reminding him that he couldn’t be too needy, but you would be lying if you said this didn’t have just as much of affect on him as it did on you, thighs clenching together with each bob of your head and moan that left his lips that he couldn’t quite bite back.

He’s an incoherent mess at the end, lips not even able to move together to form sentences and his hips bucking up wildly into your throat to release his load down your throat. His hips still bucking up slightly even after he came because it just felt that good. His mind was so clouded with pleasure that he didn’t even notice the person on the phone had hung up a long time ago, something he would have to deal with later but that proved helpful right now.

“I hope you don’t think that this was it.” Oops, now you awoke the dominant side of Levi’s switch personality and he’s definitely not letting you off the hook for this one.

[darling-i-read-it]

We'll Stay

Midsommar AU

Will Graham x fem!reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: cult, murder, suicide,

Author’s Note: I’m sorry it’s only one part, I wasn’t quite motivated enough to do 2! But I hope you enjoy it anyway <3

Requested: by anon, hiii!! so, I was curious as to whether u could possibly do a will graham (baby boy!!!) x fem!reader 2 part oneshot (with a SLIGHT Hannibal x reader but main is will graham) in which...it's practically a midsommar au! except Y/N doesn't have a fallout with partner unlike dani. Y/N, however, indulges herself into a cult after a fallout hits close to home and....yea! u can go from there and hopefully u can do it! thanks :)

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director/creator

(not my gif)

You looked out the window at the passing scenery. You hadn’t seen another person for miles upon miles. You wondered how close you were to Pelle’s commune. Hopefully close. You were getting tired and your legs were stiff from sitting in one spot for so long.

You glanced at Will beside you in the backseat. He was napping pleasantly on his jacket, his breathing even. You wish that you had been able to fall asleep so quickly. Your eyes wandered up to the front of the car where Pelle was driving, Alana sitting beside him. They were speaking so quietly, you couldn’t even make out the words. You weren’t sure why you were here.

Pelle worked alongside Alana for some time in a research based job Alana had been doing on the side. He had tagged along with her to a couple of Hannibal's dinner parties where he had met you and Will. You and Pelle had hit it off right away. He explained that he came from Sweden and would love it if you, Will and Alana went with him for the midsommar festivities. You were hesitant but Alana insisted and you didn’t want her to go alone. Plus, you were dealing with some family stuff at home. You just wanted to get away from it. As far as you could. Sweden seemed like a nice deal.

Your phone buzzed. You picked it up mindlessly, sliding it open to see the text. You only had one bar left. You must be getting out of service soon. Hannibal had sent a message.

Be safe. Watch Will.

You smiled a bit at his worry. You had wanted him to come along but he declined, saying being so far out in the wilderness wasn’t his style. You sent him back a quick text.

I will, I promise.

“Are we almost there?” you asked Pelle. He nodded pleasantly.

“Ten minutes. Can you wake up, Will please?” You nodded and turned to your boyfriend, nudging him. You caught Pelle glancing at the two of you through the rear view mirror as Will perked his head up, grabbing your hand gently.

“Almost there,” you whispered. He sat up, rubbing his eyes. He leaned over onto your lap and closed his eyes again.

“5 more minutes.”

====

“This walk was longer than I thought,” Alana muttered, laughing gently. She hadn’t worn her regular fancy clothing. It felt odd to look at her without it. Will had still opted to wear a flannel, though you told him it was going to be hot and you were going to be walking.

“We’re very close. It will be worth it,” Pelle explained. Will grabbed your hand as the two of you walked a ways behind Alana and Pelle.

“What happens if we want to leave?” he asked. You shrugged.

“We can leave.” You raised his hand and kissed the back of it. “Don’t think too hard on it.” He scoffed.

“Oh no. Me? Think hard about something?” You rolled your eyes but was quickly distracted by the clearing you came upon. There were a couple large buildings and people in white everywhere. You let go of Will’s hands in shock and looked around incredulously.

“This is my home!” Pelle said. People rushed up to see him. Your eyes went wide as he hugged and greeted them all, seeming to know each and every one of them personally.

“You know all of these people?” Alana asked.

“They’re my family,” Pelle explained before speaking some words in Swedish you didn’t understand. You smiled gently and looked over at Will.

“It’s beautiful.” He seemed skeptical. You nudged him. “I know it isn’t Wolf Trap Virginia but try and enjoy the sun.”

“We get sun back at the house,” he muttered. “I miss the dogs.”

“Me too. But they’ll be okay I promise.” Pelle had brought some people up to you. You gave them kind smiles.

“Welcome! We are so glad you were able to make it. We are about to make the announcements, you’re just in time. If any of you need anything, speak to me or Pelle.” You nodded.

“Thank you for having us,” Alana said.

“It is our pleasure, trust me.”

====

Pelle led the three of you out alongside everyone else to a nice clearing with a cliff. You had a weird breakfast that morning but you were trying to keep an open mind. Will, not so much. He was ready to go. You insisted on a couple more days.

“So what is this again?” you asked Pelle.

“Shhh, it’s starting.”

You closed your mouth and nodded a bit, watching as two older people were carried up the cliff. You and Will exchanged a look.

You watched carefully as the woman launched herself off. One of the other visiting groups screamed. Alana grabbed Pelle, asking quick questions, shaking her head, holding her stomach.

You and Will were silent. Almost unphased. You had seen so much death, it never seemed to bother you.

Then the man jumped and you just watched, his head smashed on the ground. You opened your mouth a bit and Will grabbed your arm.

“We’re leaving,” he said.

“No,” you said, probably too aggressively. Will’s eyebrows furrowed and he stood back.

“Why?”

“I don’t want to.” Pelle watched you carefully as he calmed Alana down. He suppressed a smile.

===

You went back to the houses after everyone had calmed down. Everyone had spread out a bit. Will took Alana for a walk while you stayed in the house where you slept, making sure all of Will’s things were in order if he really wanted to leave. You almost didn’t hear Pelle sneak up on you.

“You reacted well. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you up front.” You jumped, turning back to him. You shook your head gently.

“I see a lot of death in my job.”

“Still. I imagine it was a shock.”

“A tad.” You averted your eyes. He sat down on one of the beds.

“It truly is a lovely place here. I feel very loved. They’re my family and they protect me through everything. From what I know of you, I feel you would like it here.” You tried to figure out why he was telling you that.

“I do. I mean...I don’t know.” You sat down beside him.

“Here. This will help with your nerves, just smell it.” You didn’t even think about it, you just did as he said. He put it away and then watched you for a moment. Pelle put his hand on your leg. Your eyes went wide and you stood up.

“I’m with Will,” you said. “In case you had forgotten.” Pelle looked concerned though you didn’t understand why.

“But you’re meant to feel held by the things you love. Do you feel loved by him? Held by him?”

“Yes,” you said without a beat of hesitance. “He’s my best friend.”

Pelle acted like your relationship with Will didn’t mess with his plans of having you here. But who knew. He still had Alana.

====

You hadn’t seen Will since you woke up this morning. Pelle had made you go to the May Queen dance, shoving a glass of something on you. You asked where Alana was and he said he didn’t know. Where could she have gone? Where was Will?

The worries subsided when you were dancing. You couldn’t quite see what was going on and you didn’t understand it at all but your feet were moving. Your hands were being held by the other women of the commune, their laughter infectious. It almost made you forget about Will.

Almost.

You caught sight of him walking into the field of women who had already stopped dancing. You didn’t stop but you kept your eyes on him as you moved. He looked uncomfortable. You wanted to go to him but your feet told you to keep on dancing.

There was a yell and you stopped. You were the only person still up.

“You are our May Queen!” someone yelled. You were dizzy and tired. You started to walk to Will but people were getting in your way. He reached for you.

“What?” you whispered. “Why me?”

As you struggled, people put a flower crown on top of your head. You just barely touched Will’s finger tips before they dragged you away.

“I want to see Will,” you said, sounding far away. “Let me see Will.”

They didn’t bother answering you. You started to cry quietly, shaking your head.

“We are going to do a ritual!” Pelle said, holding your hand.

“Where’s Will?”

“You are the May Queen. He will not be harmed if you so wish.” You shook your head.

“Leave him alone.” Pelle nodded and gestured for Will to come forward. You grabbed his arm and he looked you up and down. How did this dress of flowers get on you? “Don’t leave me,” you said to him, slurring your words.

“I won’t. We’ll stay together.” You looked around at the people around you. They were smiling at you, hanging off of your every movement. You took a deep breath and suddenly didn’t feel the need to hide from them.

They were like a family. Like the one you should have had.

“We’ll stay,” you said convicted.

“Huh?”

“We’ll stay.”

Hannibal Tag List: @michaelmyersthestabbyboi

@elisaa-shelby

[dameronology]

one hell of a mandalorian {din djarin}

summary: actions speak louder than words - which is good for din djarin, because he's not very good at words. (this was a commission for an anon! i hope you enjoy).

warnings: language

enjoy!! if you're interested in commissions, you can find out more here :)

- jazz xx

Din Djarin was a man of few words.

That had become clear not long after you'd met.

It wasn't that he didn't like talking, or that he was rude - he'd just never had the need for it. The Mandalorian could spend days and days in hyperspace, on his own with nothing but a frozen bounty to keep him company. And they were hardly chatty, even before they were thrown away into the trawling depths of carbonite animation. There were a few select geniuses who tried to make conversation with him in a last-ditch attempt to appeal to his humanity and beg for mercy, but so far, they'd had a zero-for-zero success rate. It wasn't that he didn't have any humanity to appeal to it - because he did, and his weird, green surrogate kid was an absolute testament to that - but it just took a little bit for it to come out.

The beskar made him seem a little...robotic. Like a droid, which was ironic, because he wouldn't have gone near the things with a ten-foot-barge pole. Din had just become so used to people seeing his mask and his intimidating posture before him that having human traits, like feelings and thoughts and opinions, had never been any use. Having defining traits and a personality was all well and good, but nothing helped you through the galaxy quite like the ability to put the fear of God in people.

The Mandalorian was something, but Din Djarin was somebody. He was good; not necessarily pure and golden-hearted like a typical comic book hero, but he had a strong moral compass. Sometimes, it pointed in opposite directions, but he helped those who needed it and he paid his dues. That was probably a lot more than anyone in the galaxy could have said for themselves. In the fight of good and bad, in a world that existed entirely and black and white, there was nothing more grey than an honest man. Somebody who refused to pick a side held the power of both. For that, Din could have either been extremely smart, or extremely dumb.

Sometimes, he was extremely dumb. Made the wrong moves in combat, or got too cocky, however out of character it was for him. It was the losing fights that truly brought out the human side of Din, and it took a very, very specific eye to see it, sometimes to the point where even he missed it. It never went over your head, though.

You'd joined the crew on the Razor Crest as a mechanic - then you became a baby sitter, and his partner-in-crime, and the closest thing he'd ever had to a friend. His non-verbal nature meant that most of his emotional cues came in the physical form. It went over the heads of everybody else, but between your intuition, and the time spent in such a cramped space, it quickly became like a second language to you. Helmet tilts when he was confused, and little nods when he was pleased; tensed shoulders when the Mandalorian was nervous and balled fists when he was about to absolutely lose his shit.

Today was one of those days. Even though you were both in one piece and the baby was - by some absolute fucking miracle - asleep, it almost hadn't been that way. Nevarro had been quieter than usual, and Din had let his guard down; finally convinced himself to relax a tiny bit and ever-so-slightly loosen the stick that was firmly up his backside. His sudden lack of awareness for your surroundings had meant that someone managed to track the Crest, however briefly. The kid had barely noticed, and you weren't phased by what had been a simple, human mistake. Din, true to nature, was already beating himself up for it.

That was evidenced by his heavy footsteps, and the way he'd immediately retreated to the cockpit and slammed the door. Common sense would have entailed that he wanted to be left alone, but you'd long surpassed the point of any of that. Common sense didn't exist in a galaxy like this one. Doing the obvious thing was, nine times out of ten, usually the wrong way. Expecting the unexpected was the right way to go.

You'd paced outside the door for the better part of fifteen minutes - to go in, or to not go in, that was the question. You were torn between wanting to give Din space and wanting to be there for him; a cranky Din was often an unbearable one, but you cared deeply for him. Maybe a little too much, but that was a can of worms to open later.

"Din?" You gently called. Nothing. "I know you're brooding, or whatever it is you do under that helmet, but talking is good."

"I'm fine."

You sighed. "The scale goes great, good, bad, awful, world-ending and then fine."

"I've never heard that before in my life."

"Yeah, I just made it up on the spot." You murmured.

Resting your hand against the doorknob, you pondered for a moment. Did you want to risk it by going in? Making him mad when he was literally shutting you out? It was hard to know what to do with Din - it wasn't like he came with an answer key, or even a vague manual that could point you in the right direction. It was all just guess work.

"Is the helmet on?" You softly asked.

"Yeah."

You took that as a sign - with a deep breath, you gently opened the door and stepped inside the cockpit, shutting it quietly behind you. The tense atmosphere inside was almost enough to swallow you whole. The man practically radiated angst.

"Talk to me." You took a seat beside him.

"There's nothing to say."

"Bullshit." You murmured. "You might have a thousand inches of beskar hiding your face but your body language is a dead giveaway."

"I'm meant to protect you and the kid." He replied. It wasn't much, but it was better than silence. "It's my job to catch bad people and outrun them when I need."

"You did outrun them." You reminded him. "I'm safe. You're safe. The kid is safe. Does anything else matter?"

"It shouldn't have happened in the first place." Din said. "I was relaxed-"

"- you allowed to relax." You cut him off. "Despite your best efforts, you're a human being."

Reaching out, you gently placed your hand over Din's ungloved palm. He didn't resist or try to brush you away. His hands were soft and callous in equal measures, which felt like a fitting metaphor for him on the whole. You tangled your fingers in his and held on tightly, perhaps in a sad attempt to remind him that you were there.

But Din knew you were there - he could feel it constantly, and he thought about it just as much. Every day of his life prior to you had been filled with rigidity and angst, then you'd come waltzing in and for the first time in years, he'd untensed his muscles and stopped looking over his shoulder. Learnt to take a breath and enjoy the simple things in life, like Grogu laughing or you accidentally tripping over a tree branch. You'd become so important to him that the prospect of losing you was too much for him to even fathom. He'd come close today - too close - and it had been an eye-opener. The irony was that telling you why he was so fucking scared was more frightening than the entire thing itself.

"Don't be so hard on yourself." The gentle pull of your voice lulled him back to reality. "Please?"

His grip on your hand tightened. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." You breathily smiled. "You don't have to apologise."

"I never thought I'd have someone like you." Din admitted. "Coming so close to losing you was terrifying, even if it wasn't that close at all."

He'd never been so open about his feeling towards you before. Obviously, you knew that he viewed you in a way he didn't see anybody else, but that knowledge had been based entirely on physical cues and mere guesswork. You'd never expected him to vocalise the way he felt, or even acknowledge them. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, or even something you considered to be detrimental. The words came as a nice surprise.

"You mean a lot to me, Din." You said. He'd always loved the way his name sounded when you said it; nobody had used it for years, not since he'd lost his parents. It was something to vulnerable and personal. You were the only one he trusted with it.

"I do?"

You didn't mean to laugh at that - you really didn't, but it just came out. A low snort of disbelief; shock at his absolute inability to read the fucking room. Din was as intuitive as they came, with the ability to read criminals like a bedtime story he'd been rehearsing since he was a kid. Then it came to you, and he knew nothing. Absolutely nothing. To call him clueless would be the understatement of the century.

"Maker." You murmured. "Of course you do - more than anyone or anything."

"You're special to me." Din replied. "It scares me sometimes."

Din was straight forward with everything he said - it was just finding the courage to say it. He'd gone into battle with Imps and Republic Rangers alike; fought krayt dragons and droids and fellow Mandalorians and yet this entire thing shook him to his very core more than anything else.

You didn't know it, but you were perfectly holding his gaze. Staring right through it and looking right into his soul. He forgot he had one sometimes. It was probably a little dusty and covered in cobwebs, but it was there, and you were bringing it right out of him and back to reality.

Din used his grip on your hands to pull you a little closer - a moment later, he gently pressed the cold metal of his helmet to his forehead. It was the closest you'd ever been to him, even if it wasn't that close at all. You could hear his soft breathing through the modulator, the sensation acting as a stunning reminder that there was a person underneath there. There were times when you forgot, or felt a little disconnected from the idea entirely. You'd never felt the need to see his face, though - you hadn't a clue what he might look like, but at the same time, you had an image of him in your head. It was as clear as day; as bright as the suns on Tatooine and as persevering as the kid's insistence that he receive all your attention, all the time.

You knew what the action was; a Keldabe kiss. The Mandalorian had recounted its meaning to you not long after you'd met - he'd finally let his barriers down and let you plague him with questions about his culture and the creed, and you'd stumbled on the subject. Initially, you'd been entertained by the fact that it two such vastly different meanings. On one hand, it could be a headbutt. A beskar punch to knock the daylights out of anyone who particularly annoyed you. On the other hand, it was almost a romantic gesture; a way that Mandalorians could show their affection to one another without having to remove their armour.

Din had the latter meaning in mind, but also so much more. He was giving you a piece of his culture - including you in the very thing that defined him as a person.

"It won't happen again." The Mandalorian gently said. "I'll never let you get hurt again. I promise."

"I know." You softly smiled. Your eyes closed, enjoying the feeling of the cool metal against your forehead. "For what it's worth, I have your back too."

He softly chuckled. "Thank you."

You gently pulled back, eyes meeting again (not that you could tell).

"Seriously!" You said. "I can be a bad-ass."

"You can be a lot of things." Din replied. "You're one hell of a girl."

"And you're one hell of a Mandalorian."

[silksandcravats]

idk if this is too specific so sorry if it is but recently I've just been feeling like a burden to everyone I know and could use some comfort via fictional characters about it lmao, if it isn't too much to ask could you do something with flip comforting the reader that feels this way? sorry if its weird okaybye

A/N: Of course sweet anon! It’s not weird at all, I know the feeling! Hope this piece serves as a little pick-me-up!

masterlist

Summary: Flip’s girl is feeling down.

WARNINGS: just more soft Flip.

You couldn’t think of a worst time for the feeling to strike, but here you were staring at the floor, pretending to listen to the conversation around you. 

To be totally honest, you knew you weren’t in the right mindset for this gathering before you even left the house, you had only been seeing Flip for a couple of months but he always asks so little of you, and he does so much for you. So when he mentioned one of the guys from the station was hosting a barbeque and drinks, and that some girlfriends and wives were tagging along, you felt you had to be there for him.

You tried your hardest to play the part, even though you didn’t recognise many faces. You pushed a smile to your face as often as you could remember to, and you nodded along politely to anyone who reached out to try to make small talk with you, but you just couldn’t pick it up. 

After your third pity conversation failed, with a wife who probably only started talking to you because she noticed you standing alone and felt bad for you, you gave up and went to find Flip, feeling like a total failure. You couldn’t manage to make any friends and now he was going to have to deal with you, poor guy couldn’t get a break. Of course he didn’t do anything but smile when he saw you retreating back to him. 

“Hey honey,” he grinned, Coors in hand, he leaned over pressing a quick kiss to the side of your head, before returning to the conversation at hand. The gesture tugged at your heartstrings, I don’t deserve you, you thought sadly.

And now here you were staring at the floor, lost in thought. Thinking about how much space you took up in everyone’s lives. You felt like you’d been at the house decades, but really it couldn’t have been more than a couple of hours. 

“Honey?” Suddenly you were brought back to reality by Flip nudging your side. Your head snapped up looking at the little circle you had forced your way into. Shit. What had they been talking about?

“Sorry, what was that?” you asked.

“I said you ok there y/n?” asked one the woman standing next to Ron, Patrice? Was it?

“Oh, yeah, sorry, totally zoned out for a second, um, do you know where the restroom is?” You spit out. Yeah, that’s all you needed, you could go to the bathroom, pull yourself together, and then you’d be the best girlfriend you could for Flip.

“Down the hall, it’s the second door.” Another voice answered, pointing a beer towards the hall. You nodded, turning to walk away from the group, but before you could walk away Flip grasped your hand, squeezing it tightly.

“You okay sweetie?” He asked softly, leaning down slightly so only you could hear him. Your heart cracked, please don’t worry about me.

“Yeah, I’ll be right back, don’t worry.” You smiled, lying through your teeth. You looked at his face, he was frowning, looking at you sadly, he didn’t believe you. “Truly.” you squeezed his hand, before hurrying off.

You were happy to find the bathroom unoccupied. Closing the door quickly, you locked it and slid down to the floor, the tears came as soon as you were alone. Why’d you always have to ruin everything? You thought miserably. Why couldn’t you just play your part? Was it really so hard to follow along in a conversation? And now you’d probably embarrassed Flip, or stressed him out, the last thing he needed was more stress, he worked so hard and he deserved to just enjoy himself for once but you had ruined it. The thought made you cry harder, and you had to pull your arm over your mouth to muffle your sobs.

Suddenly the sharp sound of knuckles wrapping the door, and someone jiggling the locked doorknob interrupted you. Great, now someone had heard you. You held your breath and, not knowing how else to send the message that the toilet was occupied, you kicked the cabinet across from you softly, hoping whoever was outside would hear and seek out a different bathroom.

“y/n? It’s Flip, will you unlock the door please?” called the voice on the other side. Shit shit shit. You’d been caught mid-breakdown and now he was going to have to pick up the pieces, or maybe he’d just leave you already. Accepting defeat, you scooched over to the door, it unlocked with a soft click, and you scooted back to your old spot. You pressed the heels of your palms harshly against your eyes, trying to compose yourself as you heard the door open.

“Oh honey,” Flip cooed softly, closing the door behind him and locking it again. He crouched down in front of you, gently pulling your hands away from your face, holding them in his, running soft circles over the back of your hand with his thumb. “What happened?”

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry Flip.” You cried as fresh waves of tears trickle down your cheeks.

“What do you mean baby? Ain’t got nothing to be sorry for.” he reached up cupping the side of your face in one of his rough hands, gently wiping away your tears.

“I just,” you sniffle, “I just feel like such a burden Phil, you do so much for me and I can’t even do this one event for you without going and s-spoiling everything.” 

“Oh sweet girl, come here,” he moved, sitting against the wall, he tugged you into his lap, one hand found the back of your head cradling it in the crook of his neck, his other hand rubbing up and down your back, soothing you. “My sweet, sweet girl you couldn’t be more wrong.” you cried harder, clinging to him. “You do so much for me, you don’t even know, pumpkin. You’re so so good to me. Wish you weren’t so hard on yourself.” 

“But-but.” you hiccup.

“Shh, this is my fault baby I-”

“No!” You protested pulling away to look at him, you took a deep breath gathering your composure. “You didn’t do anything Flip, I’m just being ridiculous I-”

“Gorgeous, listen to me.” he interrupted, grabbing your face. “I don’t tell you enough how much you mean to me. You are so dear to me honey, you hear me?” he stared at you and you nodded. “And I am so proud of you.” he leaned forward, kissing your forehead, and you grabbed one of his arms, holding it fondly.

“Proud of me?”

“Mhmm.” he hummed, pulling back to look at you again, his hand wandered to your face, affectionately moving his knuckle up and down your cheekbone. “Saw you out there, mingling, making friends for me.” 

“I didn’t do a good job though,” you laughed sadly, looking away. “Had to give up and go running back to you.”

“I love when you come running to me baby, makes me feel loved,” he grins. “Hey, look at me?” you comply immediately. “You’re not a burden. Understand me? Couldn’t even be one if you wanted to. I love it when you let me in on your problems, ok? Love when you let me take care of you. You gotta promise to tell me next time you feel this way, got it?” you nod. “Promise?”

“I promise.” you wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him again.

“That’s my girl.” he praised, pulling you tight to him, rocking the two of you back and forth, making you giggle. You sat like that for a moment longer, before he patted your thigh, signalling you up. You pulled yourself to one side, no longer straddling him. “Let’s get out of here,” he said, leaning against the wall to stand, pulling you up with him.

“We don’t have to.” You offered, still feeling the tiniest bit guilty. 

“I know,” he said leaning down to kiss you, “I want to.” 

[cyclogenesis]

For the writing ask (you don’t have to answer all of them since I probably picked too many, sorry!): 1, 2, 7, 8, 10, 19, 20, 26, 30, 31, 32, 36, 38, 39, 40. (Thanks 💜)

I did it, I answered all of them!! (Yes, it took me a couple of days aha.) Thanks for asking anon! 😘

1. Which of your fics would you keep the basic plot of but rewrite completely?

Generally speaking I would rather die than rewrite anything ever, and most of the stuff I’ve written I can look back on and be like “nice”. I did recently reread a few bandom fics I wrote and felt mildly horrified by the fact that some of the writing was so spare that the dialogue sections were like reading a screenplay, so I’d have to say those would come the closest. Like I wouldn’t actually ever rewrite them, but were I to write them today they would read very, very differently.

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

Honestly I read soooo much Hydra Trash Party stuff and would love to vibe with Bucky’s sexual trauma in fic more but I feel like I’d really struggle to write that kind of background given my usual writing style. That’s the kind of super iddy thing I usually do in chatfic, but unfortunately I don’t have anyone to do that with in this fandom, so I’ll just keep whining internally about the lack of HTP Sam/Bucky while doing absolutely nothing to address that glaring lack.

Rest of the answers behind the cut!

7. Your favourite ao3 tag.

I cruise the Bottom Bucky Barnes tag like a 50s kid dragging Main.

8. How slow is a slow burn?

HERE’S THE THING. So if I ship something super hard, like hard enough to write or read fic about it, then I have already interpreted the canon itself as a slow burn because presumably they haven’t kissed yet, and I’m writing or reading fic because I’m ready for the kissing to be happening. I also don’t tend to read a whole lot of long fic. So basically I’m gonna need kissing by at least the 15k mark unless it’s like, masterfully written.

10. Top three favourite fic tropes.

You know, I’m honestly not usually drawn to stuff that’s very traditionally tropey! I don’t write it too often either, usually with fic I’m just a simple gal who wants to look at canon and then figure out a way to get them to acknowledge they want to kiss each other. I do love fake relationships though!

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

“There’s more than one Loki,” Sam is disturbed to tell him. “A bunch more. One of them is a good guy now.” Actually, Strange had described him as ‘moderately helpful and uncomfortably sincere’. “Another one, uh, broke time, and now there are multiple timelines that have created different universes.”

“Got it,” Bucky says, in the tone of someone who in no way has it.

20. Do you work on a single project or many at the same time? How does that work for you?

I usually have a couple of things going at once that I bounce between until I decide that I’m Going To Finish Something, Dammit and force myself to focus on just one. It’s generally fine because I’d rather have too many ideas than none at all, though I’ll sometimes inadvertently cannibalize myself and have to edit out things I’ve used in two different WIPs.

26. What would you describe as OOC?

I’m honestly pretty forgiving about that, having been trained to suspend my disbelief by liking really dark fic hahaha. One weird thing that tends to throw me in not-dark fic is a lack of humor in the dialogue. I tend to like fandoms with pretty funny characters or people, so I like to see their sense of humor reflected in fic. Sam and Bucky in particular are really funny characters in their own ways - gimme the banter, please!!

30. Describe a fic that almost happened, but then it didn’t.

In so many fandoms I’ve had visions of an OTP epic spanning years and years, and in zero of those fandoms have I ever completed one of those stories.

31. What was the most difficult fic for you to write (but in the end you made it)?

There is a point where every fic feels like the most difficult thing I’ve ever written. Something particularly cute that I do, which I love, is writing very intensely up to the sex scene, and then getting shy about it and wandering away and not working on it again for a little while, despite the fact that usually the whole point of the fic is that I want to get to the sex scene!!!

32. Do you have a word/expression that you always use in your writing?

I’m sure I have plenty of things like that!! I try to edit repetitive things like that out because when I’m reading a lot of a writer’s stuff little phrasing quirks always stand out to my copyeditor brain. That said, I know when I’m doing it and still tend to huffily be like “well that’s the best way to phrase that action!!” so, whatever.

36. How do you come up with fic titles? What’s the one you’re most proud of?

I either have a title from the jump or I’m combing my music library for a lyric snippet I can use like ten minutes before I post the fic. I’m pretty fond of This Is A Song About Fucking in that I committed SO deeply to jacking myself off there; it’s a phrase that Brendon Urie used to say to introduce Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off during the Nothing Rhymes With Circus tour (I had to look that tour name up. Thank GOD I had to look that tour name up) and I used it for a 5SOS group sex fic posted a cool eight years after that tour (which I went to multiple dates of, oh god) ended.

38. “This never happened” fix-it fics or “this happened but” fix-it fics?

Definitely the latter, when a canon makes a lousy choice I’m usually like well here we are, let’s talk about where we go from here. But I don’t really look for anything with the fix-it tag in general, once the canon breaks something I loved I’m usually so moody that I just abandon ship and stop reading fic haha.

39. Wildest AU scenario you have written?

I verrrry rarely write AUs for posting, but have chatficced some truly bonkers nonsense in my time. My old writing partner in bandom and I used to get weird with Brendon/Ryan - the satyr/fairy and fisherman/selkie days were really something.

40. Write a 9-word fic.

I’m too invested in the thing I’ve written 5k words of these week to think of anything new, so here’s a snippet from that instead.

“Come here,” he chokes out, and the helpless hope on Bucky’s face in response nearly undoes him completely. He sits up to meet Bucky halfway, grabs at his shirt the moment he’s within reach and drags him close, Bucky climbing onto the bed all long limbs and graceless need. The kiss is a surprise only in how rough it is, a hard press of lips like Bucky’s greedy to touch Sam any way he can, like this is just another way for them to collide.

[lotrfics]

IMAGINE: Merry and Pippin, who both have a crush on you, fighting over you

Pairing: Merry Brandybuck & Pippin Took + Female Hobbit Reader

Requested: Yes (Hi idk if you’re going to see this but I’ve just discovered your blog and I love your writing so much omg (≧∀≦) Could I please request a Merry X Reader X Pippin, where they both have a serious crush on the reader (who is a Hobbit as well) and both try to court her. They both get into silly fights with one another and try to impress her by one-upping each other in whatever they do, leading them, of course, to embarrass themselves. You can change or add to it as you see fit Thank youu) -Anonymous

Summary: Merry and Pippin make themselves look like fools with all of their attempts to impress you

Warnings: Possibly out of character Merry and Pippin

A/N: Not my proudest work... This was hard to write, I couldn’t think up of a lot for the arguing/impressing part.. Nonetheless, I hope you still like this, anon

The Shire was a peaceful but boring place. Nothing interesting happened there. Two boys, Merry and Pippin, especially the latter, who you became friends with, wanted to change that. Sometimes, the former of the two considered backing away, but Pippin would always bring him back in the mess no matter what.

They earned a reputation in the Shire for always messing up. Well, more Pippin than Merry. Merry was quite smart, and it threw off some people when they first discovered it. Of course Merry likes to have a laugh and mess around a little bit, but some things go too far for him to approve.

Some people wondered how they were even friends and take the other seriously. Pippin doesn’t consider consequences and Merry is a little serious. But both of them always laughed about it when someone asked them why they befriended each other due to some clashing traits of theirs.

Merry’s seriousness then got put to the test when he began developing a crush on you, only for him to discover in the same day Pippin liked you as well. This resulted in some small glares he would give his friend, but it did not go unnoticed by Pippin. It did not take long for Pippin to realize they both liked you, which created a conflict between them.

-

You noticed Merry and Pippin were acting a little funny. You thought they were in a really bad mood, so when you found the chance, you walked away to go do your own thing, not wanting to frustrate them. Once you were far away, they glanced at each other.

“Your presence scared her off, you know.” Pippin said. Merry glared at him in response. A couple of hobbits that passed by them rolled their eyes and shook their heads. Merry and Pippin began arguing, forgetting to consider the fact that they were still in public and some people were watching.

“I don’t know what kind of people she is interested in, but I can assure you, you are not one of them.” Merry spat. 

Pippin gave him a look. “And what makes you think I’m not one of them? She wants someone who is intelligent and takes thing seriously, remember?”

Now, Merry gave Pippin a look. “Well, you just ruled yourself out, Pip.” He said before walking away.

-

Pippin insisted to steal Farmer Maggot’s crops as usual. So here they were, running for their lives, but Pippin so far was not regretting it as he thought he could impress you for being able to steal and get away with it, though he never told Merry that.

Merry was panting, regretting he agreed to join his friend on this crop hunt of his. “I think... I made a terrible mistake....by befriending you!” The boys kept running, Farmer Maggot was not that far behind. You went outside your home, trying to figure out what the commotion was all about.

Merry and Pippin looked up to see you, and they both grinned at you. “We got enough for you as well, (Y/N).” Pippin said proudly. You shook your head at them, both amused and disappointed. Suddenly, they tripped, making you gasp. Worried about them, you ran to them, and you saw their flustered faces.

Farmer Maggot and his dog appeared, roughly picking up the boys by the back of their collar. They were too shocked to do anything, even move a little bit. The crops they stole were taken back from them.

You gave them an apologetic look. “Are you okay?” But you already knew. They were not okay. They just fell, embarrassing themselves, and the crops that were meant to be given to you were retrieved before they even reached your doorstep. “It’s okay, how about you two come inside my house? I have supper ready.” They both nodded and quickly made their way in, not wanting to be outside at the moment.

-

Bilbo’s 111th birthday party was tonight, and while you never really spoke to him, you were still invited, because the entire Shire was small enough everyone can be invited and it won’t be overwhelming for him. 

You were sitting alone, highly considering leaving until you heard a familiar voice. “Would you like to dance, (Y/N)?” 

You turned around to see Merry all by himself. It felt weird not seeing him with Pippin, but you knew you don’t really bring your friend with you to ask someone to dance privately, unless you truly need support.

“Of course, Merry.” He led you to the area where everyone else was, and began dancing to the music with him, not really sure what you two were actually doing. You were both terrible dancers, and from time to time, you both would have a laugh about it. Still, you didn’t care if anyone were giving you weird looks, you were having fun with your friend.

Pippin, who was quite far, but was at a good spot, clenched his jaw at the sight. Looking around, he found a couple of hidden fireworks. An idea popped up in his mind, and he smiled to himself. He needed assistance, though, and the only person that would be willing to help is none other than Merry himself, who he was jealous of.

-

Merry had to stop dancing with you because Pippin wanted his help to set off the big fireworks. “I’ve had more than enough of your wild ideas, Pip.” He walked out of the tent to see if Gandalf was around, then gestured to Pippin to keep moving once he confirmed no one was watching.

After lighting it, Pippin tossed the big firework to Merry, then ran out. “Come on, Merry, you’re supposed to set it off outside!” Merry was struggling, it was too heavy for him, and he could barely move. He was running out of time. “Get back here Pippin, this was your idea!”

Before Pippin could respond, the firework set off, making Merry fall to the ground, smoke all over his face, really messy hair. Pippin cackled at the sight, but was guilty for leaving his friend in the tent. This was not his plan, he was trying to impress you by setting off the firework, and they did, but something went wrong during the process, which would be Merry looking terrible.

Getting up, Merry had a serious face, then began laughing with Pippin. “That was great! Let’s go get another one.” Pippin nodded in agreement, and before they could walk away, the sound of Merry yelping caught him off guard, and he turned to see Gandalf pinching his friend’s ear. 

You were also right next to Gandalf. You saw Merry and Pippin go to the tent, and when the fireworks went off, you immediately made your way there, wanting to know if they were still alive after that.

“Meriadoc Brandybuck. I should have known.”

From complete shock, Pippin stayed quiet, somewhat throwing Merry under the bus, because while Pippin had a major part in setting off the fireworks, Merry now had to wash all the dishes by himself because Pippin never took blame for it. You and Pippin decided to help him out, you two, especially Pippin, felt really bad for him.

Merry was now giving Pippin the silent treatment. He was definitely going to scold him later once it was appropriate to do so. Pippin would mumble apologies every other moment, only to be ignored. You placed a hand on Pippin’s shoulder to comfort him; he always recoiled whenever someone was angry at him.

-

A few days later, Merry and Pippin reconciled. All their jealousy was not bringing them anywhere good, so they agreed to confront you themselves to ask you if you were interested in either of them.

They found you sitting by a tree. They gave each other a glance and a nod before walking over to you. You heard the sound of the grass, made from someone’s movement, so you looked up and smiled when you saw your friends approaching you. 

However, you frowned when you noticed their faces. Even Pippin himself looked serious, which told you whatever they were going to tell you was not a laughing matter in any way. 

“(Y/N). There is something we would like to ask you.” Merry said. You closed your book and looked up at them. You didn’t respond, only looking at them, which told Merry to keep going. “Pippin and I both like you. Tell us if you like either of us. We’ve been fighting about this and it’s unnecessary.”

Your mouth gaped at how direct that was. It completely threw you off, but you managed to respond in time before Merry and Pippin began to think you weren’t listening. “I’m really sorry, but I don’t like either of you that way. But I hope we can still be friends after this.”

Merry and Pippin looked at each other, then back at you, then shrugged. “We can handle that,” said Pippin, “so, how is your day going?” You couldn’t help but chuckle at the sudden change of topic. They both sat down, next to you, and began talking about their own day. 

You were glad they still agreed to remain friends with you, even if it’s a little awkward between you three at first after what Merry just told you. You acknowledged reciprocating one of their feelings would only hurt the other, and you never wanted to hurt either of them.

-

Another A/N: Sorry if you were looking forward to (Y/N) choosing between Merry and Pippin... or if the ending was too unrealistic... but I didn’t want to have one of them left hurt because they weren’t chosen

Taglist: @aspiring-ginger​

[shyrose57]

Brothers anon and other anon it makes me really happy that you like my au! I only planned for Foolish Jr. To be the name of a special totem Foolish had that he gave to Ran (its special cause while it can be used as a normal totem, if broken it can summon Foolish as a small part of Foolish is in the totem. It can also be used multiple times and repaired as many times as needed, which basically made it Foolish's personal totem). Though for Finley, I have it so the group stumbles upon a desert village that manages to point them in the general direction of Foolish's home. But I realize they wouldn't actually be able to find it, so I'll have Finley find Jackie who manages to convince her to take them to her father's temple/home. 

1: Yep. While Ranbob did tell Ran that his memory has been getting better, Ran still is a bit hesitant and treats everything as if Ranbob will forget it. Ranbob did tell him Dream caused it but Ran didnt believe him.

8: Cletus, Grievous, and Jackie I would all consider anarchists. Although Grievous may be less of one than the other 2. A bored group means finding stuff their not supposed too and screaming. 

11: Shocked, relieved, happy, a bit sad, and impressed. Even when Ran booted him off the top of the King of The Hill, he was still relieved and happy his brother was alive. 

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14: No one in this au, in the sub Brothers + Others. Ranboo, Phil, and even Techno get to throw Jackie. Though Jackie only got willingly thrown by Ranboo and Phil. For Techno he just kinda got in the way so Techno picked him up and threw him into nearby bushes. Also, I HAVE NEWS! I decided Raq will kidnap Ranbob, as this could be the perfect push to make Ran go "Oh fuck. I really do still care for him." And have Ran run out into the middle of the night to find him. With the others following behind by a hour or two. 

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Duel wield :). Just imagine you have to fight Techno just to see him wielding two duplicate strong ass swords and he's like an extention of them cause he's so good at using them. 

More emotional pain than you think, but somehow also less than you think. Don't ask me to explain cause I'm not sure how I just get that vibe from the group to be honest. I'm sorry.

All of the above, Tubbo tells Jackie the long running joke of Ranboo being the main character due to his incredible luck with finding rare things or getting out of situations. And Jackie gives Tubbo blackmail by saying how Ran once willingly stepped into water because he never had a big fear of it growing up (cause Mizu) and he actually forgot that water hurts him. 

If one does spark a city will fall. 

Yeah, they all kind of make group sessions where they all sit down, exchange known information and look at it while trying to piece it together. They also exchange suspicions and conspiracies they have. 

He succeeds in convincing Ran that people aren't always as they seem and that some actions have a much deeper meaning. Like he uses how he lives with Techno and Phil and how they where feared anarchists that once ruled a world wide monarchy and where known as basically immortal because no one could even get close enough to hurt one of them. So he was scared of them when he first moved in, and how while it was rough at first, he learned their reasons for destroying L'Manburg, see how Techno wasnt the monsters others said he was, was given training and praise by Techno, and a father figure and someone who made it clear how much they cared for him by Phil. And he never expected any of that, so he tells Ran to attempt to get close again to his brother, cause his brother hasn't changed that much, but he needs to get closer to see. But he fails in stopping agurements because whenever he gets involved he gets yelled at and he doesnt have enough prior knowledge to completely and truly help. 

Sapnap and Karl say they dont really mind, cause they where never really close at all with anyone in any haunting group (for now). But they also feel a weird separation from everyone else, not a massive one but like there's a small wall between them and everyone else.

Anger, mostly from Techno. Cause Techno is pissed Dream is still around and its when this information gets out Techno basically states that their all staying until Dream is laying dead at his feet. To which Phil, Ranboo, and Sapnap all happily agree. Ranboo is surprised and feels awful. He feels like its his fault that Dream has tortured his descendants. Phil is just as angry and eager to kill Dream as Techno. Sapnap is also pissed and eager to be face to face to Dream so he can say exactly how disappointed he is in him (cause he knows Dream still cares about him, even if slightly). Tubbo and Karl are hesitant to kill Dream. Mostly because their scared of how killing Dream will affect the timeline and are still worried about how they'll get home. 

It doesn't get worse but it also doesnt get better, it mostly stays the same until Ranboo snaps and says something that really affects them. In which the fighting does get a bit better. 

Other anon, here is your reply!

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1: Oh no, that's not good.

8: Sounds like a recipe for sweet chaos.

11: Aww, that's sweet. Also makes the following events more painful.

---------

14: They should toss Tubbo and Jackie at the same time, just one immediately after the other. Also, very fun! How does Ranbob get kidnapped? How does the whole rang react to it? How quick do they get him back, how do they do that, and what happens in the aftermath?

---------

Terrifying image, I'd flee immediately. Bad enough that he had one, people must be absolutely horrified that he's gotten ahold of an exact replica of his powerful blade.

Honestly, I think they just radiate that feeling in general, anon.

Pfft. Oh that's hilarious. How many times does Ranboo's Main Character energy come into play? Does Ranbob forget he can't go in water too? How many times have one of the ender siblings just went to step into a puddle or something while their groups panicked?

What kind of pranks do they have in mind to be so destructive??

Interesting. What kind of theories do they have so far?

On one hand, that sounds like very good advice, and potentially offers Ran wanting to get to know the other two more. On the other, all I can imagine is Ranboo being really cryptic and ominous while his descendants are just like '???'.

For now? Do they get closer to them? Does anything spark this?

I'm curious, what exactly invokes those feelings for Techno and Phil? Ranboo and Sapnap I can understand, with Sapnap feeling some responsibility for Dream, and Ranboo for his descendants, but as far as I know, weren't Dream and Techno somewhat allies? Did Dream do something back in the past to gain the two's ire? Or were they angry for a different reason? How do the others react to Tubbo and Karl's hesitation, both before and after knowing their concerns?

What does Ranboo say that does it?

[toxicpineapple]

is there a specific reason u dont like oumota?? or do u just Dislike it

oh boy anon you’re really gonna have me go into that kinda conversation alright... i guess it’s no secret that oumota is my least favourite pairing, so i don’t mind talking about it. all that aside please keep in mind that these are my opinions and i have a lot of respect for people who ship any pairing (aside from the problematic ones, obviously, pro-ship dni) and i have zero desire to start any fights with anybody.

i’ve never been a fan of enemies-to-lovers as a trope. i think it’s good to start there. one of my earliest fandoms was the death note fandom, and there was a LOT of lawlight (l x light) content. still is, i’m sure, i just haven’t been by the fandom in a while. i just, i absolutely hated it. i was in fifth grade at the time so i was a bit... oblivious, to chemistry between characters as a whole, but also, it just didn’t make any sense to me! they hated each other! why would you think that’s a good relationship! light LITERALLY wanted l dead and i’m not gonna say any spoilers in case i have followers who haven’t seen the show yet but the way things go down... it just didn’t make sense to me. there was the homoerotic foot rubbing scene, of course, and l tells light that they’re friends, but light was being ACTIVELY MANIPULATIVE the entire time. i didn’t see why people would want to ship people who are enemies. i couldn’t wrap my head around it.

after being in fandom for a bit longer, i think i’ve managed to figure it out, lol. i am (and will always be) of the belief that any pairing can be done well, given enough time and attention. (again aside from the problematic ones i’m not here to engage with incest or pedophilia okay that shit is nasty and i don’t need your “it’s fiction!” bull that kind of mindset perpetuates abuse.) if you can sell me on it, then damn, sure, i’ll be into it. i’m still not big on enemies-to-lovers, that fifth grade mindset of “it’s so weird to ship people who hate each other” hasn’t really gone away, but i’m open to it. if you can sell it, i’ll buy it! that kind of thing.

i still prefer friends-to-lovers though. in the danganronpa fandom, i’ve always prefered naegiri and hinanami over naegami and komahina. (oumasai and saimota are the exception, i go back and forth on them but ultimately i love them equally, ouma being my favourite antag and all) i just think that positive interactions are healthier, and communication is easier when you’re not at each other’s throats all the time. this is obviously my opinion, subject to debate and all that, yadda yadda yadda. i’ll take shy smiles across the breakfast table over homoerotic pauses in the middle of arguments any day of the week.

i think you’re starting to get the reason why oumota isn’t my cup of tea. still, i like naegami and komahina, like, a LOT. enough that i would write them on my own time, extensively, just because i feel like it. there are pairings where i wouldn’t be so willing, where i’d just shrug and do it if requested but ultimately keep to my side of the playground. even if i don’t immediately jump to shipping people who dislike each other, that doesn’t mean i should have an avid hate for this pairing! so what gives?

it comes down to this, anon: ouma and momota HATE each other in canon. with a lot of enemies-to-lovers things, there’s like, a brief moment of mutual appreciation to give people steam. byakuya and makoto have that!!! byakuya is there to help makoto as much as he can after their killing game, and from post-chapter four onwards byakuya is unreservedly on makoto’s side. they work together!!!! at the end of the game byakuya says he’ll help if people need it!!!!! (through the byakuya translator ofc.) and then he DOES!!!!!!! he went into the neo-world program to help makoto!!!

and komahina has that too!!! all of chapter one, for example? nagito’s ftes? at the end of nagito’s ftes hajime starts to really, truly understand why nagito is the way he is. he doesn’t agree with his actions but he gets it! and he feels BAD for him!! so bad that nagito lies and says what he’s been talking about didn’t really happen. not to mention 2.5, and post-canon, all the potential for slowburn while the remnants are living together on jabberwock island.... they make me soft.

saiouma has that too, i mean, i wouldn’t call saiouma enemies-to-lovers necessarily if only because shuichi is so passive for most of the game, but they have those, like, those small moments. ouma calls shuichi his beloved, and i do believe his behaviour in chapter four was just manipulation, but still, y’know, he was flirting. ouma’s love hotel shows that shuichi is LITERALLY his ideal, and shuichi puts up with all these death threats and games throughout ouma’s ftes in an attempt to understand him-- the final fte is so sweet, how shuichi bandages his finger after he cuts himself.... pique chaotic dumbass energy but they’re adorable as hell.

and i’m sorry to say this, but in my opinion and as far as i can remember... oumota...... doesn’t have that. not once does either ouma or momota show anything but cool distaste for one another. momota PUNCHES OUMA IN THE FACE in chapter four, which is the first real time you see the two of them like.... interacting? (aside from kaito begrudgingly, secretly agreeing with kokichi about people watching the motive videos, but that’s not shipping fuel imo.) and it only gets worse from there. throughout chapter four kokichi goads kaito, trying to pick at his insecurities-- not to mention he tries to get closer to shuichi, someone who kaito has been very close to this entire time!!! he insists that shuichi investigate with him, rather than with kaito, and keeps egging him on throughout the entire trial, mocking him and praising shuichi, the like. and after the trial kokichi PUNCHES KAITO IN THE STOMACH!!! AND KAITO HAS A COUGHING FIT SO BAD HE FALLS TO HIS KNEES!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!! sorry i’m trying not to be akdljflk about this it just... gah. i dunno. ouma absolutely SLAUGHTERS kaito and shuichi’s relationship, deliberately picking at kaito’s insecurities in order to tear down the group as a whole, and i just... it rubs me the wrong way.

chapter five is even worse for me. i know it’s like the biggest shipping fuel people have for them, and i,,, i get it? it’s poetic, the villain and the hero, these two purple dudes who represent opposing ideals, in this scandalous romance behind the exisal or whatever. i just can’t with it, though.

let’s talk about what ouma does to kaito in chapter five :)

-he knocks him out with an exisal and takes him hostage -he sends all his friends (except maki, beautiful, erratic maki) into a DEPRESSION so that the audience will get bored and stop watching the killing game -sorry i already said this but he KIDNAPS KAITO!! HE KIDNAPS HIM!!!! AND TRAPS HIM IN THE EXISAL HANGAR!!!! -he forces kaito to be indebted to him by pretending to drink the antidote and then giving it to him -he THREATENS MAKI!! HE THREATENS HER LIFE!!! IF KOKICHI DIES MAKI WILL BE EXECUTED AS THE BLACKENED AND KAITO KNOWS THIS!!!! i don’t care if you ship momoharu those two had A relationship regardless of whether you saw it was romantic or platonic and kaito cared about her??

he essentially held both maki and kaito hostage and BLACKMAILED kaito into going along with his plan. at the end of the chapter five trial kaito states that he went along with it because he thought it was brilliant, not because kokichi threatened maki, but i still just... it kind of horrifies me.

(i want to be perfectly clear that i LOVE kokichi ouma, he’s a brilliantly morally ambiguous character who did a bunch of fucked up things to try to achieve a noble cause and in no way is this me shitting on him, i’m just saying that given the things kokichi did to kaito i just, can’t get behind it.)

i should also address that even after kokichi did all that, even started BREAKING DOWN in the exisal hangar, kaito maintained that kokichi was a bastard who was difficult to understand. kokichi was being perfectly clear about his intentions. he wanted to end the killing games. i don’t think he ever wanted anything else, in the game. after all of that, for some reason, kaito still just didn’t get it. and i don’t think it’s because kaito is stupid-- kaito is NOT stupid, as funny as the memes are-- i just think that he was genuinely unwilling to try to understand kokichi ouma. he was sympathetic towards a lot of people. shuichi and maki and kaede and gonta and all of them. but he just, he didn’t like ouma. and i feel as though (this is just my speculation so don’t take this as anything real) kokichi never held anything towards kaito except resentment, either. because here’s this THICK DUMBASS who is ruining EVERYTHING that he’s trying to work towards-- not only that, but everyone absolutely adores him, the one thing that kokichi can not, no matter what, hope to achieve. because in order for his plan to work, he needs them to hate him.

all this is canon-compliant, though. i think ouma would’ve been a lot more mild in a non-despair au. i still don’t like the pairing in any aus though, regardless. i just don’t feel like they have the right kind of chemistry. ouma is, he’s like, he’s childish! he likes picking at people, trying to get reactions out of them. y’know who’s easy to get reactions out of? kaito. and not because he’s some funny stupid man, because he has CRIPPLINGLY LOW SELF ESTEEM. kaito is DEADASS afraid of ghosts and i know it’s a funny haha but he nearly shits himself whenever they’re so much as mentioned and ouma is the type of person who would just continue to bring them up to get the reaction out of him. it’s like shipping hiyoko and mikan, y’know? mikan gives hiyoko the reactions she wants and mikan takes it because she’s desperate for attention of any kind. they both feed into each other’s worst tendencies. kaito is easily challenged. all you have to do is imply he’s not a man and he’ll do whatever you want. that’s not HEALTHY!! and ouma would take advantage of it. not because he’s a bad person, but just because, he like,,, he messes around and he takes things too far because he’s a child and he hasn’t seen any real repercussions. that’s what i believe.

this is more of a petty, unrelated reason, but i also used to follow this really annoying oumota shipper who was constantly shoving the pairing down everyone’s throat and absolutely slaughtering kaito’s characterisation in the meantime. in a lot of fics i read before becoming actively against it, i saw ouma being a sniveling crybaby, totally unable to defend himself from anything, and kaito being this callous asshole who was mean to everyone but ouma. i just, i don’t see it? and then maki is always portrayed as so abusive, threatening and hurting ouma all over the place because kaito likes him and not her and shuichi is borderline obsessive if not outright creepy, either jealous of kaito or kokichi because there’s no grey area with these people, and they just, they make shuichi and maki so unsupportive and mean and i just... i don’t like it, not at all. the fastest way to make me hate a thing is by vilifying my favourite characters.

sorry for the long answer, anon. i know i have followers who like oumota, and i respect you for it! it’s just a MAJOR squick for me and i try not to engage with it if i can avoid it! thanks for the question!

[hopevalley]

Your last post was great food for thought. How would you have written Jack off the show? Personally I think they got the when wrong. Should have got them married end of s3, then written him off going to the Northern Territory and not coming back...

Thanks, Anon!

I’m a bit on the fence about Jack to begin with. On one hand, I agree with you completely: they should have been married before the end of S3, and then Jack’s decision to fight in S4 (after the death of his old pal Doug) would have been huge. They built up this “oooh, he could diiiieee~” narrative, after all. Seeing it come to its (arguably natural) conclusion would be acceptable.

On the other hand, there was something kind of nice about Jack dying when it wasn’t expected. If nothing else drove home that life as a Mountie was not this picturesque landscape of loveliness, that did. Oh, you mean he could die...while just training some men? Doing something in a position that multiple people said he should be honored to be considered for? Oh my!

It was still too contrived for my taste, though. It’s one thing to kill him off in a time of relative peace when he’s just minding his own business, but it’s something else to kill him off-screen and...after making him talk about how safe the job was (which it clearly wouldn’t be, as mentioned before in this series*). Talk about tonal shifts! AJ went to prison, and then there was this weird birthday thing that most of the viewers didn’t care about (where we pretended like Bill’s life wasn’t in mortal danger just days or weeks earlier), and right at the party gets into full swing this just haaaappens to be the moment a Mountie comes into town to tell Elizabeth that her husband died. And of course she’s standing conveniently Right There. Oh, and also, he definitely died a hero, not like a regular guy. How could she live with herself if he died like a regular guy? (/sarcasm, if you couldn’t tell.)

*I might actually be thinking of the When Calls the Heart movie where Edward talks about nearly dying during his own training.

A more convincing and arguably terrible (with positive connotations) way to write Jack’s death off-screen would be to place Bill outside or in the jailhouse when the Mountie comes riding in. He’s still recovering from literally almost dying (a pretty big deal, considering his age) and now he’s just found out Jack has died in some contrived bullshit manner...and it’s his duty to go with this guy and tell Elizabeth, because Bill isn’t the sort of character to shirk duty (neither career nor personal). Elizabeth is family now, after all.

It would at least do something to cement relationships and connections in this show before the actual funeral/grieving episode. Also, seeing Bill’s initial immediate reaction before he clams up and follows protocol he’s been taught from a young adult onward—that’d be delicious character stuff when he has his discussion with Abigail later.

Ideally, though, I’d probably do something more along the lines you’ve suggested (earlier marriage, more expected death). It’s just, by the time they’d decided to actually go through with killing Jack, I feel like it was too late to Take It Slow. If I were in that position, stuck in S5 and having to kill Jack off by the end (10 measly episodes, by the way), I’d do the following:

Jack gets reassigned entirely to train new recruits and there is some kind of set time frame for this. One year, two years: something like that.

Elizabeth and Jack have a rushed wedding that’s not visually impressive but sweet in other ways that have a big impact on the characters. Forgive my language here, but fuck the modern traditions the audience thinks they want (that weren’t even around during this time frame in many cases)! I’d have given them a truly romantic wedding in the church with recognizable faces in the pews and maybe a potluck picnic lunch afterward.

Logically this only happens if the characters worry that it isn’t something they can do later, right? It’s not that he worries he’ll die, but it’s the reality they live in that something could happen to him, and it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Also, Elizabeth won’t want to wait another year (if we say his placement is for at least that long), so it’s not hard to imagine her insisting on doing it immediately.

One final aside, I think this also gives Elizabeth the excuse to remain a schoolteacher in Hope Valley with the idea being that she can spend her summer with Jack (when she’s not teaching)—something she can’t do if they’re not married. At least, not without scandal.

Their ‘honeymoon’ is something they put on hold but probably a place they both wanted to go that’s not completely out of left field (get my joke?) and meaningful to both of them. (This is set-up for Elizabeth eventually going there alone for a letting-go type of scene when it would feel good/appropriate to see.)

They spend the week or two before he has to leave together, and during this time they discuss their future more seriously. Make it mostly the kinds of things that will feel bad when looked back upon after knowing of Jack’s death, but which still ring of some kind of ‘hope for the future’ at the time. S5 had a lot of bullshit in it, not all of which was bad, but the ‘dreams’ were too focused on tangible sorts of things and not the dreams of a couple madly in love who want to be together forever. 

The house is kind of silly scope-wise. If they’re dreaming about it, a line from Elizabeth to Abigail (or Clara, or anyone) that Jack wants to do it but she knows it’s not feasible on his income would make it seem like sweet dreaming.

This would be a good time for them to discuss where they want to honeymoon when Jack gets some time off and they can manage it financially, too.

While Jack is gone, Elizabeth reads some of his letters to Abigail. Maybe there could be some cute/saucy bits where she says “I’ll skip the next few paragraphs” or whatever, but the idea here is that Jack has arrived to his destination, is doing well, and Elizabeth is not particularly worried about him.

IF POSSIBLE, scenes of Jack bonding with these green bean boys. Young, largely untrained, idealistic... Man, we know Bill did a lot of teaching and stuff like that at one point in his career, too, so this could be a nice segue into Jack starting down a similar path! 

Also it cements his relationship with these men and shows not only that he DOES care about them, but WHY.

If this is NOT possible, at least allude to it in his letters. Mention specific names so that the audience feels a connection, however small.

Also if possible, show Jack’s death, or at least show him making the decision to risk his life for these young men he cares about.

If this isn’t possible: show a scene in the cafe where a patron is reading a newspaper with the date of Jack’s death on it (preferably not a character who had any issues with Jack personally), and Elizabeth is reading Jack’s latest letter to Abigail. It’s not quite as good but I think it would get the point across.

Because Hope Valley isn’t really modern enough for addresses, Bill gets the news first. He goes with the Mountie to speak to Elizabeth. This doesn’t give us tonal whiplash from hell, but maybe occurs during a quieter/less busy time.

Also, there is NO Abigail in this scene. She’ll get her time and I feel like her being a leech on Elizabeth’s character was a huge mistake. Let Elizabeth bond with other people!!!!

We could also really use the insight into Bill’s character and how he reacts “in the moment”—particularly compared to how he acts later. Him keeping his cool (for the most part) and then breaking down in the quiet of his own home/at his desk in the jail (or keeping it together until his conversation with Abigail) would do wonders for his character.

The funeral isn’t shown at length. No speeches. (I’m sorry, I don’t care for those and I don’t think Elizabeth would remember them anyway. They’d just be this massive blur.) She reflects on a hazy view of the casket from her own perspective, and maybe I’d add an iconic scene of the horse walking into the mist with the boots in the saddle facing the wrong way.

You know, the kind of scene that isn’t lovely or anything, but it still feels haunting. Especially if that horse is Definitely Sergeant. 

Elizabeth revisiting the grave (as she did in the final episode) is quiet. No music. Just her in the silence walking over to the grave and kneeling in front of it because that’s what it’s like and I feel as if that sort of deeply personal scene would resonate with a lot of viewers. 

I don’t deny that the original scene was lovely but that’s the issue: it shouldn’t be #aesthetic-based because that’s completely unrelatable. Most of us look mediocre at best when we visit a gravesite.

I also think there should be parallel Elizabeth-visiting-Jack’s-grave scenes in later seasons/episodes to show progress, and rather than going on the anniversary of his death maybe she goes on his birthday (and/or other special days) instead to celebrate his life. These scenes are always quiet and always gentle, and if there is music at all it’s just barely there.

I could also really go for her running into someone else there who is visiting a grave if there was time for it, just for a conversation.

I’m also REALLY uncertain about the gravesite they put him in in the actual show, just because I’m not sure Jack’s wife couldn’t pick where he was buried. I feel like for these characters, if Jack wanted to be buried anywhere, it would be near his father or in Hope Valley’s own cemetery (which isn’t shown after S1, but we know is there).

I’d go with Hope Valley for the #aesthetic if nothing else. Then Elizabeth can visit whenever she wants and we could watch her visits drop off over the course of a season or two.

Also then her running into someone else should be her running into Florence visiting Paul’s grave. She doesn’t get much in the way of sweet dialogue so this would be wonderful.

I chose Florence specifically because she doesn’t seem ready to move on and it’s been a long time, and maybe I’d even appreciate a comment along those lines by her: that she doesn’t feel the need to remarry/etc etc. Having Abigail (who did move on) and Florence then to give us both sides of the spectrum...feels good.

Then in later seasons/episodes, Elizabeth could run into people at the grave/around the cemetery who are there specifically to see Jack.

Bill leaving flowers/just standing there quietly.

Abigail coming to talk to him and keep him updated about all the really little things (but never the big things because those are for Elizabeth to tell). Maybe more of a stop-off after visiting the graves of Noah and Peter.

I don’t feel Nathan needs any sort of connection to Jack, but I think just the idea of Jack’s death would be enough to make someone like Nathan think twice. What kind of man was he? What did he die for? How well did he love this town? Will I ever fill the shoes he left? I could see him going and just thinking about those things.

It’s not a masterpiece and perhaps not even possible due to timing (the episode limit really messes with good plotline ideas), but I like the ideas in concept.

[nenastrology]

Please talk about johnny joestar he is my favorite jojo character and your brain is huge

anon you are the only one i respect i swear to god im constantly thinking about him.. ok this is going under a cut out of respect for everyone who follows me who doesnt give a shit about jojo or part 7 and its gotten horrifically long im sorry

see this is where me actually liking part 1 and having rewatched the non hamon battle parts like 4 times finally pays off because i can mentally go into constant excruciating detail about like the ways part 1 is reimagined and like how they are both essentially the disfavored son in comparison to a brother but like jonathan is given a conflict that can directly contend with his family issues like he can punch dio and work that out hes given a perfectly laid out heroic quest to solve his turmoil and also confront if dio really is like better than him johnny is given no like easily narrative closure to those similar fears he could never like prove if he is better than his like very human extremely normal brother like he couldnt beat him in a race and like be like tee hee im the better horse racer or something and like side note jolynes definitely given the best version of the narrative conflict tying into familial and emotional issues that she like is both coming to terms with her relationship with her father while also like fighting a villain with ties to dio and like understanding what he went through and like she also like becoming her own self and reconciling with him all that shit ok back to johnny..

genuinely hes like the only jojo with a real arc… like id say jolyne and hermes are definitely like prototypes for characters experiencing um development and their past issues with their family and whatever like being part of how they grow and like become closer and trust each other but like johnny and gyro are the finally realized conclusion of araki being dragged into learning what character development is idk i really love johnnys entire journey that like he finally has somebody who gives a shit about him and he has like something he actually cares about that like ends up pulling him out of his aimlessness and he discovers how ruthless and driven he can be it drives me absolutely insane how nobody seems to um get his character that hes like some soft uwu boy when hes like absolutely one of the most ruthless and definitely the biggest asshole of all the jojos like god its sooo funny how like jonathan and dio its like dio has all the asshole energy and also they grew up together so theres reason for the animosity but johnny and diego have the same level of asshole energy and johnnys first reaction to seeing a dude who beat him at horse racing a few years ago like probably mortally wounded is just like hm he can die i really hate that guy but they barely know each other nobody gets it man…

but back to other things god im sorry i mean you know how disorganized i am you signed up for this sending me this ask jsd;dks; idk like god the fact that the fights actually became vehicles for character development forcing johnny and gyro to each face their own fears and like come to terms with what they truly value really gets me like johnny finally able to like go from idk needing to just be selfish out of survival instinct because everyone who had cared about him rejected him and like being forced to pick between the like thing he thought was giving his life meaning (the corpse parts) and gyro who was actually what was making the journey worthwhile and like he really for a moment thought he couldnt do it like didnt know if he had it in him at like his lowest point there and like he realizes hes far stronger than he thought he was and that he ultimately will do whatever he has to for the people he loves which like all really comes full circle with the lil flashback in part 8 showing johnnys death like that sugar mountain saying those who lose everything will ultimately gain everything well he does finally get the corpse back and in his possession and when he finally has it like its purely to use it to save his wife and son and like his sacrifice both tying back to jonathan and erina and like everything he learned in the course of sbr like ugh ;w; its sooo sad but ultimately like the perfect ending even if im gonna go like weep now..

im really saying things and going nowhere i havent even gotten back to his father oh my god i really love that like after hearing his father be proud of him like he literally just rides away and ultimately doesnt finish the race that like its this weird odd melancholy way of ending the whole thing like he idk stops when he needs to stop and has like found his own self worth apart from his fathers approval also hm its very weird i think later on how his disability is written that like literally some of the first things johnny says in the entire story is that him saying its the story of him learning to walk again is not in the literal sense but in the metaphorical sense but then by i guess convention that araki got too lazy to figure out how to make some of the later fights work and i guess because he hates metaphors that arent pounded into ur skull cuz i guess if u are making the stupid choice to read jojo u are stupid enough to need everything spelled out for u he decided he needed some other way to signify johnnys growth and its just very awkward and weird when like the whole story is him becoming more at peace with his past and everything that has happened to him its lazy and stupid and whatever ok i literally am like forcing myself to stop typing because im feeling the deep shame kick in because i dont think ive written this much about any character other than like yusuke or sasuke probably and i feel like the little spray bottle in the back of my mind that activates when i think too hard about jojo but like ok ive said my piece you may ask me more specific questions if u want me to elaborate.. whatever stan johnny joestar… this whole text wall was me coming to terms with him probably being my favorite jojo..

[spideyy-girl]

Let Me In ~ Winter Soldier!Bucky Barnes

Request: Hi!!! I was wondering if I could request a song fic with wintersoldier! bucky x reader? The song is called Lily by Alan Walker, K-391, & Emelie Hollow. I’ve been listening to it nonstop lately. Thank you!!

Song: Lily - Alan Walker, K-391, Emelie Hollow

Summary: Bucky feels stuck with hydra always controlling him, and he can’t quite get a grip of himself. One day he escapes and finds someone that could change his life.

Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe

Warnings: Sad Bucky, HYDRA being a bitch (as per usual), sorta sad but fluffy-ish ending

Word Count: 4526 (12.6 pages) long af

Date: March 31, 2019

A/N: thanks anon now I’m obsessed with this song too lol. Also, I didn’t know which character you wanted to be “Lily”, but I feel like it suited Bucky better with the whole locked in his super soldier mindset thingy. Hope it makes sense? Hopefully this is what you wanted, and if it isn’t, I’d be more than happy to rewrite it to better suit you! Also sorry if it sorta sucks I was running out of ideas :/

This takes place a few months after CA: Civil War, with a little bit of Infinity War reference at the end.

Lily was a little girl Afraid of the big wide world She grew up within her castle walls

Bucky laid in his board stiff bed, eyes baring straight up into the ceiling above him, a dull beige colour with pipes running along it. He raked his mind, over and over again, trying to remember anything he could. Hydra was starting to get in his head, and he had started to think of what had happened before hydra made him who he is today.

A monster, a murderer. A soldier.

Now and then she tried to run And then on the night with the setting sun She went in the woods away All afraid, all alone

He always thought the word was quite a stretch, aren’t soldiers supposed to help people? He asked in his head. Although his commander says that what they do is to help others, he didn’t feel like that was truly the case. But he didn’t dare say that, not unless if he wanted to be strapped down in that room again, tortured until his mind was a blank slate with nothing but kill.

He hated it. He couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted out.

From the little things he could remember of his past life, he feels happiness, laughter rings in his ears. There’s one little blonde guy that seems to appear a few times as well. But those are just flashes. He needed answers. And he needed them now.

He sat up from his position on his bed and looked out the window, watching the sun turning from light blue to pastel pinks and oranges. He looked the opposite way, out the open door and into the empty cold hallway. He saw this as his chance. He stood up with haste, grabbing his gun from its place under his bed and shooting the window. As he was climbing out, he heard security screaming the only name he knew.

“Soldier! Get your ass back in here!” He heard his commander yell at him, before hearing the familiar sound of the loading gun. As if second nature, Bucky lifted up his own gun and shot out 3 bullets, hitting his targets with practised perfection, before slipping out and running into the abandoned woods outside of the compound. He was free. Finally free.

They warned her, don’t go there There’s creatures who are hiding in the dark Then something came creeping It told her, don’t you worry

Bucky walked for what felt like days, looking for anything, anyone. Maybe even someone that might help him rediscover his past. The blonde boy from his leftover memories kept flashing through his head. He must know something. So that was Bucky’s new target.

He continued to wander, thoughts running through his head, crowding his brain so much he couldn’t think straight. He couldn’t hear the sound of quickly paced footsteps, he couldn’t see the shining brightness of the nearing lantern.

“Hello?” the girl questioned again, putting the lantern up as she continued to walk closer. “Sir? Are you ok?”

The soft sound of her worrying voice triggered him, taking him out of the depths of his mind and causing him to raise his gun, merely missing the woman and hitting the light beside her, causing it to go out. “Holy shit!” she screamed, dropping the shattered object to the murky woodland ground. The feminine voice startled the man as well, and he quickly lowered his weapon. She looked from the shattered glass on the woodsy floor up to the soldier's weary eyes, seeing many things in only a matter of seconds. 

"Hey, I'm sorry if I scared you," she whispered, trying to get closer to him, trying to help. He looked like he could use some. "I know you must be concerned, lost maybe. I just wanted to help you." Her words were gentle and held an unfamiliar comfort in them, making him let down his guard completely for just a few moments. He nodded, not knowing why, but not questioning his actions either.

"I'm sorry-"

"There's no need for that," she quickly reassured, cutting off his unnecessary apology. She reached out her hand towards him, in a welcoming matter instead of the usual threatening one he received. "Now, I have a little cottage just a bit down. I don't mean to sound... weird or anything, but you're more than welcome to stay the night and I'll get you some food before you continue on whatever journey you're going through at the moment." She said with kindness, a matching smile adorned her beautiful face. He couldn't refuse, so, of course, he didn't.

Follow everywhere I go Top over the mountains or valley low Give you everything you’ve been dreaming of Just let me in, ooh Everything you wantin' gonna be the magic story you've been told And you’ll be safe under my control Just let me in, ooh Just let me in, ooh

Bucky stayed with the girl he met in the woods, whose name he learned was Y/N. She told Bucky that she lived in New York and that she was going back next weekend, and offered for him to stay with her until then. Bucky told her about his blonde friend, and how he was trying to find him. Of course, he refused to tell her about his super soldier past. Bucky felt an odd sense of protection around her. He felt as if he could trust her, like he already knew her for many years.

Bucky sat at the round wooden table, the room was dimly lit by a weak ceiling fan, the only sound coming from the scraping of the metal spoon against the bowl filled with warm soup in front of him. The annoying sound was almost white noise to him as he stared at the girl visible from the other room, presumably the kitchen, preparing for food for him. The girl felt eyes boring into the back of her head, and she smiled and poured out her own cup of soup and took a sit with him. They sat in silence for a while, both enjoying their meals, before the silence was broken by the super soldier.

"It's good," he said, his voice quieter than what he remembered. The girl looked up, a slight hue of red across her cheeks as a smile spread against her innocent looking face. 

"So he speaks," she teased, her bowl completely forgotten about at this point. She put her elbows on the table, resting her chin on her hands as she observed him in the (not so) better light. "So, you want to talk about what was happening out there? I thought you had to be on something but.. it doesn't look like it." She told him, observing his mannerism or any other signs that might help her find out what a handsome man was doing somewhere like here. Bucky gave her a quick skeptical look but proceeded with explaining the odd circumstances in which they met.

"I'm... I'm looking for a friend," he said in a small voice, avoiding eye contact. "I'm not sure where I am." She sighed, reaching out to grab his hand, trying to comfort him. He flinched back from her touch but let her take his rough palm in her soft, rather small one. 

"Ok, listen," she said, squeezing his hand and rubbing her thumb against the "I can't guarantee that your friend will be in New York, but I may have some friends who can help. I just want to let you know, I'm not trying to hurt you Bucky." She said with a smile. Bucky frowned and took his hand out of her grip.

"How did you know my name?" he said, his free hand gliding down to the hidden knife on his thigh. Y/N giggled, but her eyebrows furrowed.

"You told me, don't you remember?" She said, looking concerned for him. Bucky stopped his movements, shaking his head and offering her an apologetic smile and nodded, looking at the floor. "It's ok, there's probably a lot going on in there. C'mon, I'll show you the spare room, leave you to get comfy. You look like you could use some rest." She got up, the old wooden chairs scratching against the laminate floor, Bucky following in suit going down the hallway and examining his new victorian looking room. He smiled and gave a quick thanks to the girl before closing the door, going to sit on the double bed.

On the other side on the bedroom door and down the narrow hallway, Y/N sat in the small living room, picking up the telephone and dialling a well-remembered number. The familiar deep scruff voice picked up the phone with a 'hello?'. "Steve? I think we found our guy." She stated in a soft voice, so the man she met that day wouldn't hear. "And I think he remembers us."

She knew she was hypnotized And walking on cold thin ice Then it broke, and she awoke again

Bucky woke up to the bright sunlight shining through his window the next morning. He rolled off the bed, his instincts telling him to grab for his gun and get suited up for today's mission, that is until he bumped into the tall dresser, which came tumbling down towards him. Luckily, he caught it, but the insides fell out, creating a large crashing sound. Bucky cringed, before pushing the cabinet back up against the wall and trying to stuff the contents back into it. Suddenly the door opened with Y/N showing on the other side, her hair in a messy bun and an apron wrapped around her waist. She saw the current situation and gave out a small chuckle.

"I make you food and give you a bed to sleep in, and in return you decide to trash my house," Y/N jokes with him, rushing over and helping him clean up. Bucky looked at her with a guilty smile, and she rolled her eyes, her grin only getting wider. "Come on, I made you some breakfast before we head out. I hope you like pancakes?" A confused look came on his face as he put the last of the things away before following the girl outside the room.

"Never had them," he said. As he walked into the dining room he was greeted with the best smell in his life, his stack of pancakes placed neatly on the dining room table. She gasped, before pushing him towards the table and seating him on the chair, placing a fork and knife in front of him. 

"I like to think mine are pretty great," she said excitedly, placing a hand on his shoulder, and he looked up to see the girl beaming back at them, before nodding to the breakfast food. "They're my favourite. Go on, eat up!" She smiled before patting his shoulder and going back to finish packing her suitcase. Bucky ate as if hasn't in months, more than satisfied with the sweet treat. Y/N giggled as she saw him scarf down the pancakes, grabbing a plate of her own and going to sit beside him, starting on her own.

"So, tell me more about your friend," Y/N said as she set her fork down after finishing her pancake. Bucky looked up at her, before swallowing what pancake he had left in his mouth and beginning to talk. A good sign.

"He's small, blonde, umm..." Bucky started, trying to kick start his memory, anything else he knew. He saw Y/N across the table tilt her head, slightly resembling a lost puppy, he couldn't help but think. "Truth is, I don't know much about him. But I remember him, from my past." Bucky tried to explain.

"Your past?" Y/N questioned further, trying not to sound suspicious. Bucky looks down and nods. "Did something... happen in between?" Bucky looked up at her, being cautious of what his next words would be. He didn't want to scare her off.

"You can call it that," he said in a whisper. "I can't remember much of my last few years." He tried to explain, Y/N nodded in understanding.

"Like long term memory loss?" She kept questioning. He nodded his head, his long hair falling in front of his face. Y/N's face changed, her eyes going soft as she reached over and pushed his hair out of the way, startling the boy. He's never been shown this type of affection. She blushed and took her hand away, mumbling a sorry. The room stayed in silence for another few minutes, before broken by Y/N.

"I'm sure you'll find him, Bucky," she said, offering a hopeful smile towards him. He looked up and gave her a small smile back. Y/N stood up and took their plates and cleaned up a bit as Bucky took the extra time to freshen up a bit, before trying to get some research done on what might've happened to him before. Maybe it will give him a hint as of where to go.

The week went by relatively fast, and Y/N did everything she could to help Bucky find what could've happened to him and his friend before HYDRA took him back and brainwashed him once again. Of course, Bucky didn't reveal that certain detail to Y/N. Soon enough, Friday afternoon had reached and Y/N was packing her small buggy car and the two now closely bonded pair went on their way home. Well, Y/N's home at least, or what he was told was her home.

Then she ran faster than Start screaming, is there someone out there? Please help me Come get me Behind her, she can hear it say

The week went by relatively fast, and Y/N did everything she could to help Bucky find what could've happened to him and his friend before HYDRA took him back and brainwashed him once again. Of course, Bucky didn't reveal that certain detail to Y/N. Soon enough, Friday afternoon had reached and Y/N was packing her small buggy car and the two now closely bonded pair went on their way home. Well, Y/N's home at least, or what he was told was her home.

Y/N was oddly silent throughout the ride. Music played in the background as Bucky kept stealing glances at the girl beside him, she seemed almost nervous. He pushed it off as normal, thinking that he would probably be nervous taking someone he only met a few days prior to his house. But that's wasn't what was running through the Y/H/C's head.

Y/N was starting to wonder if she should maybe turn back, feeling as if she was selling the man off. Of course, she knew what she was doing was for his own good, which is the only reason why she kept on the crowded highway. But she had made a bond with Bucky, and she was hoping this wouldn't ruin anything that's been growing between them. Especially if the said bond would eventually grow into a more than friendship thing. Hopefully, her colleagues would be ok with it.

"You alright?" he asked, looking at the girl in concern. Y/N shook her head, trying to shake her thoughts out of her brain. She put on a smile and gave him a quick nod.

"Yeah, I'm fine. A little bit nervous." She laughed, though it sounded uneasy. The music seemed to get louder in the sudden silence as Bucky slowly put his hand on her leg, not in a very implying way, just as a sign of comfort. He felt her relax under his touch and she turned her head to give him a smile. Within another few minutes she pulled into an underground garage park of a tall glass building, with a bit of a weird structural design, Bucky thought to himself. Y/N took her suitcases out of her trunk, which Bucky quickly took out of her hands, claiming: "a pretty girl doesn't have to carry her own bags. Just let me be a gentleman."

They got into the nice elevator, which had plenty of levels. Y/N pressed a button closer to the top, and the sliding doors closed and it jolted before smoothly going up. AC/DC came through the speakers, of course, considering the building they were in. After a minute or two, the metal box stopped and the doors slid open again. The first thing Bucky realized when he walked out with Y/N, was that they were not alone, and he realized this probably isn't her real apartment.

At the sound of the elevator dinging across the room, Steve Rogers halted his talking with Sam, Wanda, Natasha, and Clint. Everyone's eyes darted towards the two new people who entered the room. Bucky's eyes widened as he saw the one and only Captain America. He looked between him and Y/N, who was walking over to hug Wanda, a close friend of hers.

"Y/N, what the hell is going on," Bucky asked once Y/N broke apart from the Scarlet Witch, grabbing her shoulder and turning her towards him, but not too harshly. Y/N diverted her gaze and sighed, looking down before meeting his gaze. HEr eyes looked like they were starting to water.

"I'm just trying to help, Buck," she said, reaching for his hand. He pulled it away from her, taking a step back. He looked up at Steve, he knew it was his blonde friend from his almost ancient memories, even though he looked extremely different, he could tell. Actually, he recognized everyone in the room. He doesn't know from where, but he can't deny it. He scanned the room again before turning back at Y/N.

"So you did already know my name that night, didn't you?" Bucky jokes to try and ease the tension. Y/N let out a laugh, sounding relieved, before nodding. A small tear ran down her cheek.

"Yeah, you have no idea how scary that was," she smiled, and he gave her one back. He wasn't mad that she had brought him here like she originally thought. If anything he was extremely thankful. For the first time in his life, he felt safe. Y/N spoke again, raising her hand as if to present the other people in the room. "Well, Bucky, meet the Avengers. Or a part of them at least.

Follow everywhere I go Top over the mountains or valley low Give you everything you’ve been dreaming of Just let me in, ooh Everything you wantin' gonna be the magic story you've been told And you’ll be safe under my control Just let me in, ooh Just let me in, ooh

The team went back the large glass table in the back of the room with Y/N and Bucky, to discuss the plan to send Bucky to Wakanda. Steve explained that Y/N would accompany him there, to make sure he stays safe and doesn't go back into Winter Soldier mode again. Bucky was a bit reluctant at first, but with a little bit of convincing from Y/N, he agreed to the plan. The two went to Y/N's room, where she would pack the remaining of her stuff for the trip, and Bucky would pack his new clothes and leftover personal belongings he left there.

"So, you're an Avenger too?" He asked as he neatly folded a t-shirt before placing it in his suitcase. "Got a special power or anything?" Y/N giggled, a sound Bucky had grown accustomed to already.

"Yes I am an avenger," Y/N said, feeling proud. "I can jump through and manipulate space." Bucky looked back at the girl, obviously confused with what she said. She rolled her eyes, a goofy smile coming on her lips. "Basically I can teleport and move objects," she dumbed it down for the 100-year-old man, to which he nodded, an 'ah' coming from his mouth, before looking at her and giving her a smile.

"Sounds pretty badass," he commented, a smirk on his lips as he left his packing for a second to go walk towards her. Y/N laughed at the comment, dropping the jeans she was folding and turning to the taller man as well. She gave a nonchalant shrug.

"I guess so," she said. He smiled down at her, thinking of how cute she was. His hand reached out and grabbed her own, which she gladly accepted with a small squeeze. She glanced at their interlocked hands before looking back up into his brown eyes again, which seemed closer to her than they were a second ago. "I hope you don't mind me going with you to Wakanda. I'm sure you'd rather it be Steve but I'll try and be just as good of a company as he is. I've always wanted to go to Wakanda too, I've heard it's stunning and they've got really amazing technology. I'm sure you'll find it interesting as well. Maybe that might not make up for Steve but-"

Y/N's excessive nervous ramblings were cut off by Bucky, or his mouth did. Bucky's kiss was soft, his hand still caressing the back of her hand as the other one reached up to her jaw. Y/N's hands reached up to his long hair, running her fingers through the surprisingly soft locks. The pulled apart after a few second, foreheads leaning against each other. Y/N kept her eyes closed, but her smile grew slowly more evident on her face. Bucky couldn't help his own grin when he saw this. 

"Trust me, I'm more than happy that I'm going with you," he said in a whisper, but just loud enough for the girl to hear. This only increased the growing smile on her face, so much that her cheeks were starting to hurt. But she didn't mind. "I wouldn't want anyone else."

Everything you wantin' gonna be the magic story you’ve been told (Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh) And you’ll be safe under my control Just let me in, ooh

*A FEW YEARS LATER*

Bucky awoke from the bright Wakandian sun shining through the large window. He couldn't complain about his new life, as if he never escaped HYDRA he'd be waking up to the same annoying alarms and slaps on the back by upper officers. Bucky stretched his arms over his head, a soft groan passing his lips.

"Good morning sleeping beauty," he heard a raspy voice coo from his chest. There lay his amazing girlfriend of almost 5 years, Y/N, looking up at him in adoration. He smiled and left a kiss on the top of her head, wrapping his arms around her exposed waist as she cuddled into his bare chest again.

"Morning, darling," he whispered, giving her another kiss on the cheek before meeting her lips. He could feel her smile into it. The cute moment was broken by a knock on the bedroom door, followed by a voice.

"Sargeant Barnes, Miss L/N, they're here." Shuri's voice came from behind the giant metal doors. Y/N groaned before sitting up, followed by her boyfriend as they got changed, exchanging in light conversation and a few stolen pecks here and there. The couple walked out together, meeting Okoye, a fierce warrior and the commander of the Dora Milaje, and T'Challa, the king of Wakanda and a new close friend. As they met, the group walked out of the grand doors to be met by big quinjet and an all too familiar group of people. T'Challa talked to the remaining of the Avengers about what seemed like a defence plan.

"You will have my Kingsguard, the Border Tribe, the Dora Molaje, and..." T'Challa stopped speaking and motioned towards the pair walking towards them.

"A semi-stable 100-year-old man," Bucky said as he walked towards them. Y/N kept beside him, Bucky's hand placed on the small of her back. He removed it to go over to hug his old friend, as Y/N took the chance to say hi and give hugs to the rest of her team, her family.

"How you been, guys," Steve said as he hugged Y/N, She happily gave him a tight hug, as Steve was like a brother to her. Y/N returned to Bucky's side as he wrapped his metal arm around her waist protectively 

"Uh, not bad," Bucky said as he looked down to the incredible woman beside him. She looked up at him as well, offering him a smile as she briefly leaned on his shoulder.

"For the end of the world, at least," she finished, causing Bucky to roll his eyes, though a smirk was still on his face, and Steve let out a chuckle. The reunited team head inside to speak of how to get Vision's stone out of his head. Bucky and Y/N soon departed to go with the Kingsguard to speak of a gameplan. Bucky and Y/N suited up, getting ready for probably the biggest battle of their lives.

"You sure you'll be alright?" Bucky asked her, slightly worried as he saw her practising her spatial jumps around the room. Y/N teleported right in front of him, a smirk coming across her lips.

"Might I remind you, I am a former Avenger and all-time badass," she joked, wrapping her arms around his neck, to which he automatically put his around her waist. Bucky laughed.

"You remind me at least twice a day, Y/N," he snapped back. The girl feigned a hurt expression, before letting out a laugh. Bucky let go and reached for his gun and soon, an alarm went off from Y/N' kimoyo bracelet, signalling the threat has finally arrived. Y/N sighed, looking over at her partner, and gave him a soft smile.

"Time to go," she said quietly. Bucky gave her a sad smile, not wanting to think of what might happen to either of them out there. He grabbed her face and kissed her passionately. Y/N quickly responded, her hands going up to his hair and his shoulder. He pulled apart before resting his forehead on hers.

"I love you, Y/N," he whispered to her, his hands still on her jawline. She smiled up at him, giving him a quick peck on the lips. "So much."

"I love you, too, Bucky," she said, a tear slipping from her eye. Bucky wiped it off with his thumb and Y/N sniffed, parting from him as she stood up straighter and grabbed her knives. She grinned at Bucky one last time before the terrible events that happened during the Battle of Wakanda. "Now, let's go kick some alien ass."

Follow everywhere I go Top over the mountains or valley low Give you everything you’ve been dreaming of Just let me in, ooh Then she ran faster than Start screaming, is there someone out there? Please help me Just let me in, ooh

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

Sorry if you've answered this already but based on the current trajectory/pieces on the board and your own awesome ideas on the show -- if you were in charge, what would S14 look like/be about?

Hello. I have a question, and it may seem weird. But is it confirmed that Jensen’s new character is Dean possessed by something? or does everyone just assume that? Because Judging on the pictures we’ve seen of him as the new character, his outfit is pretty ‘old timey,’ you’d think if he was possessed that whoever/whatever possessing him would just wear whatever Dean is wearing at the time right? Or am I wrong and looking too much into it?            

Hey there!

I’ll tackle these asks together as well if you don’t mind. :)

I’m sorry for only replying so late and also only with this short reply, but I am truly so short on time due to traveling for work atm that in my days off I just have so much other stuff to do and plan prior JIB that I simply can’t be online as much atm. So sorry again! *hugs*

Given the latest episode I personally think that we will likely end this season on a mixture of endings such as in S8 and S9. I get the feeling that possibly none of the main characters will actually end the season in the same place, but will each face their respective “all goes to hell”-moment. And with that I don’t mean they are in different universes, but they’ll be split up and each of them focused on a different obstacle. And I also kind of think that the Apocalypse World thing may not be resolved this season.

But to make it a bit easier, I’ll give you some things I could imagine happening in S14 or the end of S13 that takes us over to S14 and that being things I’d pick to explore if I was to be part of the writing team.

Judging from official descriptions it seems that in 13x21 the Winchesters may enter Apocalypse World once more and trying to bring Mary and Jack back. From spoilers we know however that won’t go as smoothly as expected because Mary seems to see that world as her form of purgatory and doesn’t want to go back. Futhermore in 22 apparently they plan on saving lots of innocents which I suppose could mean they will try to bring all of the resistence over to the normal SPN world including Kevin, Bobby, etc.. At the same time it seems Rowena is dealing with Lucifer in some way as the official description for 13x22 says that Rowena’s interaction with Lucifer will have an effect on the outcome of the journey for one of our heroes. Now question is does journey mean the journey to the other world or their story in a broader sense? In any case the hook line is called “hitching a ride” which at the very least feels ominously alluding to possession or something like Dean carrying Benny out of purgatory in his arm. That said based on these infos I could imagine that

a) Lucifer may be wounded ot even dead after his confrontation with Rowena, which is the reason for

b) the last bits of his power keeping Heaven stable enough (where was he btw? because he seemed to not have been in Heaven since the whole low on bettary thing and lights flickering wasn’t a thing when he was around) are gone and Heaven would fall and that leading to

c) all souls kept in Heaven crashing to earth and causing chaos - and the show using a parallel to how it was in S9 with the angels that possibly some of those ghosts, because they are unable to deal with this opt for possession.

d) the falling souls thing would be of course another perfect possibility to bring back deceased characters (this is also where I could imagine the show truly got JDM for some short scene as John), but much more than that truly re-arrange the whole natural order (and with that also give Death a whole lot more trouble), because

e) with Heaven falling and apparently Hell being run by no one, I think they could really let a few big bads come out to play from Hell.

f) Furthermore Heaven falling and God remaining absent and Jake possibly also staying back in the AU would make for a blank in power structure that so far jas been filed by everything christian belief/lore and in that regard Gabriel going after demigods of other cultures and beliefs feels important, because those smaller religions, etc. could be filling that blank space.

And that brings me to the main characters and what may be in store for them. The least ideas I have for Sam’s story tbh, but I think whatever it will be it will be tied to Rowena and witchcraft (possibly even his psychic abilities coming back or his demon blood addiction playing a role again) since for seasons the show has been framing Sam with witchcraft in particular and with Rowena as well.

Cas I could imagine is either the one to finally remember there exists another archangel in their universe that they may try and contact and in so far could be trying to rise Michael from the cage in a desperate attempt or could even go as  far as tyring to reach back to the Empty and get that place’s entity to allow more angels to return. In any case they will make this angels dying out thing a very personal journey for Cas I assume.

And last but not least there is Dean and that is probably who everybody is thinking about most and while the show has been alluding to Michael!Dean or Death!/Reaper!Dean or more generally Dean dying quite heavily I think it will be none of that or at the very least in the shape we have come to know.

As I have said before on this topic of spoilery pics from set and that Jensen posted himself, the vibe I am getting is that whoever Jensen plays is something/someone that hasn’t been walking earth in a long time or never (really, their “it’s someone from a while back” could just be distraction). Just look wise I fangirled over the outfit because as a massive Peaky Blinders fan it reminded me a great deal of those costumes, but moreover reminded me also of “Baron Samedi” (who could fit the bill of someone from way back and something related to Death).

At the moment I think that what- or whoever Jensen will play (and of course they could truly just opt for a doppelgänger plot with Hevane falling and possibly different world collapsing someone looking like Dean but not being Dean could pop up, but I think this is a more unlikely possibility) is a creture/character that only comes into being due to the situation and blanks left by Heaven going out of business and there needing to be someone to “guide those souls” to their new resting place. If they wanted to they could perfectly use  Baron Samedi like figure here to do that. Now question is why that creature would look like Dean but dress differently or would chose Dean as his vessel. I have no good explanation or idea, but it could be the Billie as Death knows Dean’s expertise in that regard and knows something will come - she was very interested truly about what would happen if Sam died (you could even argue that Sam getting hurt/death could have brought about the chnge in Dean Billie is after - again I don’t think Billie will survive this season) - and that Dean would be the right one for the job. More generally I think Dean is in a mindset where he would make a deal - even possession of some sort - if it meant they could save the world. Also, reapers are supposedly a league of angels, couldn’t they possibly be “promoted” to angels and power Heaven and therefore someon who has worked as a reaper before filling their place? Anyway...

So to answer your first anons questions (and this really just a brief collection of ideas I have, I could also imagine Cas trying to get some angels from AU to this world for example, but there are so many ideas but I can’t get them in order or at least can see them work on their own but nor woven together, so I left those out)

All that said if I had to take over from here on out, I would work with Heaven falling and the aftermath of that and explore that. Likewise one would also have to take a look at the state of Hell, because who runs that atm? I’d stick to this main thing and would work everything around that in terms of personal arcs and would chuck the million tiny stories Dabb opens up with each new episode without resolving or truly takin time to develop them.

And now to the second ask. No, I don’t think it was said anywhere that Dean will get possessed. It is just based on allusions throughout the season one could think that was foreshadowing, but also it would be the easiest explanation and the current staff seems to go with the most obvious options. But no, in general it could be someone who looks like Dean or appears in his shape, but is not possessing Dean. If Jensen playing someone else than Dean and Dean disappearing would be a dead serious confirmation imo that this mini arc won’t last longer than 3 episodes or 4 at most, because the show simply cannot function without Dean as Dean, because Dean builds the emotional core and serves as the narrartor of the show, so if he isn’t there, the show lacks it’s heart and soul. That is not to say Sam isn’t important or that Cas isn’t, but I am saying this without any maliciousness involved, the show can function and has shown to function when they are not around as Cas or Sam (see all the times we had Not!Sam or Not!Cas), but that would not be the case with Dean. He is the stepping stone and core of it all holding it together, so... I’d be surprised if the show went with Dean not being Dean for much longer.

[traincat]

Thoughts on who the woman on the cover of 2-in-1 #5 might be? Issue #3 mentions a mysterious woman who says she can help but like who is she?????

This being the cover in question – short answer is, I don’t know. She doesn’t look to me like any particular Fantastic Four character on first glance; if the hair were darker, I’d say they were somehow doing my beloved Alyssa Moy justice, but no, seems she’s still a crushed brain and/or a robot her unnecessary boyfriend constructed. Justice for Alyssa Moy. Anyway, based on just that glance, I’d wager she’s a new character. 

But. But. There’s one other scenario that occurs to me. I think it’s pretty unlikely, but I’m going to talk about it anyway, because:

And I’m sorry anon, but I’m going to use this answer to finally write my updated meta on this subject of Lyja, the Skrull Johnny unknowingly married while she was in the guise of Alicia Masters, tackling the nature of the retcon, some really bad writing, and the truly baffling reaction to this from future comics only doubling down on the creep factor. Warnings for discussions of rape.

But Traincat, you might say, didn’t you talk about this for like six hours on Stormcast? Yes, I would answer, that unfortunately just led to more thoughts on the subject, as I had to reread the issues in question.

All 100+ of them.

See, this is actually the storyline that got me to read All of Fantastic Four, where before I had mostly been bouncing around post-Heroes Reborn (everything south of 1998) and the original Lee/Kirby run. And I have problems discussing this storyline, because it makes me uncomfortable in a number of ways. First because I find this storyline, and more importantly the way it eventually played out, deeply uncomfortable, in part because it refuses to ever let itself confront how deeply uncomfortable it is. It’s always pulling back from the edge in way that seems hollow and more than a little victim blame-y. Second, because of my own personal paranoia issues, this is like, my literal nightmare scenario, although I think that’s the least important aspect of my discomfort with it. It’s very unlikely I’ll accidentally marry an alien spy, but trust me I’m on the lookout for the regular variety.

Third, because of the misogyny that is frequent in fandom, I’m often uncomfortable criticizing female characters in love interest roles, which was how the character was initially presented to me and how in fact most canon after the fact treats the character, however, I am going to suggest, erroneously they do so. But Lyja isn’t a Karen Page, Mary Jane Watson, or a Gwen Stacy, and my criticisms are not grounded in her perceived worth as a romantic partner for Favorite Male Character. More over, Lyja doesn’t exist out of context of this relationship. Her only appearances center around it. And another important aspect is that I don’t even think you can properly view Lyja as one character, because half of Lyja’s appearances aren’t, strictly, actually Lyja. The character at the time the comics were being written was not intended to be her, and so you enter a weird stretch of canon where I, at least, because of the way I read comics, have to simultaneously examine it two ways: pre-retcon and post-retcon.

A retcon is, by definition, a piece of new information that imposes a different interpretation on previously described events, typically used to facilitate a dramatic plot shift or account for an inconsistency. In this case the retcon was used for the former, and actually, I think it works quite well for its purposes. It’s just that it tells one story and then refuses to commit to it.

But to backtrack. I’d been vaguely aware of Lyja for a while before I decided to sit down and read this from the beginning, mostly through fandom osmosis and the Marvel wiki. She was always presented to me as an actual love interest who, if they had a particularly melodramatic plot, at least also had a real relationship with Johnny. This, I’m going to argue, is not the case, not in the least because when discussing this you actually have to discuss three completely different relationships: the originally intended Alicia-as-Alicia and Johnny, the retconned Lyja-pretending-to-be-Alicia and Johnny, and Lyja-as-Lyja and Johnny.

But to start at the very beginning, Johnny and Alicia, who would later be retconned into Lyja, began a romance during John Byrne’s run on Fantastic Four, following Ben’s decision to stay in space after the initial Secret Wars. It’s a time of emotional upheaval within the team: Ben’s left the team, replaced by She-Hulk, and Sue’s just suffered a miscarriage.

Here, in Fantastic Four #267, Johnny and Alicia embrace in the hospital. Like I said above, there’s two ways to look at every Johnny/Alicia scene before the retcon: with the intent with it was originally written, and how the retcon reframes it. The original scene is lovely, actually – Johnny and Alicia, two of the closest people to Ben and Sue, embracing in the hospital and leaning on each other in their grief.

With the retcon, it becomes something very different. This is canonically Lyja’s first one-on-one contact with Johnny. Her mission is in shambles – Alicia was specifically picked, it would be revealed after the retcon, to be replaced under the belief that an agent masquerading as one of the Four would be discovered, but a Skrull disguised as Alicia, one of the closest people to the Four, might be able to slip detection. But if Ben isn’t part of the team, the role of his girlfriend becomes less valuable. She won’t be able to get as close to the Fantastic Four as her mission requires unless Lyja manages to ingratiate herself some other way. Reed and Sue are a married couple who just suffered the loss of their child – they’re too complicated. She-Hulk’s also a newcomer, so cozying up to her as a confidante doesn’t provide much security. Johnny’s the obvious target – and he’s vulnerable. He’s missing Ben and grieving for his lost niece. What starts as a bittersweet scene of two friends comforting each other becomes, with the retcon, a moment where Johnny’s grief and emotional vulnerability is used against him.

Cut for length.

(Fantastic Four #358, the issue immediately after the Lyja reveal.)

Maybe the thing about this retcon and the subsequent handling of it that bothers me is that it actually really works. If you look at it with the retcon in place, it doesn’t feel out of place even though I’m sure it was hastily cobbled together – there’s only one issue’s worth of build up to tip the reader off that something’s wrong before the “Alicia” Johnny married is revealed to be a Skrull. But if you’re going to pull a twist as dramatic as this, you need to commit to it, and address how dark this is, and how every aspect of Johnny’s life was violated for the sake of Lyja’s mission – and, later, violated all over again because Lyja wanted to continue the relationship, heedless of Johnny’s wishes.

In Fantastic Four #275, we’re shown the aftermath of Johnny and Alicia’s first time together:

This is, for the record, more or less the closest thing there is in canon to a Johnny Storm sex scene, which is odd for a character who’s often categorized first and foremost as a womanizer: a morning after scene where he does, in fact, seem regretful, or at the very least uncomfortable. It’s interesting to think about that aspect with the retcon in place. Is Johnny uncomfortable because he feels on some level that something is off? It’s a strange scene with or without the retcon (John Byrne both wrote and drew this stretch of Fantastic Four, so you can’t blame a writer-artist disconnect). Without the retcon, it certainly seems like he’s trying to back out of the relationship, but Alicia isn’t on the same wavelength, and with it, “we’re neither of us children” is a very manipulative line from Lyja. She knows from a previous discussion before they got together that Johnny’s youth is something he’s self-conscious about, that he doesn’t really feel “adult.” (Alicia, for the record, is at least a few years older than Johnny. Byrne identifies her as having met the Fantastic Four when she was 19, but then Byrne also retconned a large gap in between Reed and Sue, and introduced Ben’s famed Aunt Petunia as a woman much younger than her husband.)

Johnny/Alicia, pre-retcon, is a strange relationship. There’s a lot of big romantic talk, but very little chemistry between the characters, and I have to confess: I think this was always about Ben, and the betrayal Ben feels when he comes back to Earth and finds that Alicia, his on-again, off-again one true love, and Johnny, the closest thing he has to a younger brother, have gotten together. 

There is this panel where Johnny talks about how in love he is, and how he’s never felt this way before…

… but it’s hard to take it seriously as something special when this is not unusual for him at the beginning of a relationship, flame-heart and everything:

I once went looking for what John Byrne thought of the retcon without much luck, but I did turn up an interview where he said that, while the characters hadn’t told him where they were going yet, he didn’t think he would have married Johnny and Alicia when he left the book with Fantastic Four #294, which is curious when there’s a scene where Johnny seems about to propose before he’s interrupted by Fantastic Four business. 

That being said, the timing of Byrne’s departure didn’t leave much choice but to get Johnny and Alicia married – there were only six issues until Fantastic Four #300, and any time there’s a hundred issue mark, you want a big story like a wedding. And the marriage is where things get tricky, both, I think, from a storytelling perspective and from a common problem with larger canons and fandom osmosis. If you say two characters were married, it implies certain things: that they were in love, at least. The problem being that Johnny and Alicia never had real chemistry, not like Ben and Alicia do and not like Johnny and Ben do. Because, as I’ve said – this was always kind of about Ben.

Alicia: Sometimes, when we touch, I can’t help but think of Ben.Johnny: Oh thank God it’s not just me.

Whenever a post-retcon comic tries to treat Johnny and Lyja’s relationship as a normal comic book romance, they usually use the marriage in defense of that, calling Lyja Johnny’s estranged wife, but leaving aside the fact that Johnny didn’t know who he was actually marrying, that implies that the marriage was happy and stable. Which it wasn’t.

From almost the very beginning, there were problems. Shortly after the wedding, Reed and Sue decide to leave the team and the superhero lifestyle so they can better focus on raising Franklin. Ben, the new leader of the team, is tasked with finding their replacements. His first pick is Sharon “Ms. Marvel” Ventura, another plotline I could scream for one hundred years about for a badly handled rape subplot, and his second is Crystal, Johnny’s first real love. Crystal is at this time recently separated from Quicksilver, who she’d left Johnny for, and Ben partially does this with the intention of putting strain on Johnny and Alicia’s marriage.

This is five issues after the wedding. Johnny and Alicia only returned from their honeymoon an issue before. If you have to keep the fictional romantic relationship you’re writing interesting by introducing a new love triangle just five issues after the wedding, then you’ve got a problem with the relationship you’re writing.

The thing is, Ben’s scheme almost works – from the start, Crystal’s presence shakes Johnny up and makes him doubt his relationship with Alicia. If you did a shot for every time he thinks, in anguish, “I love my wife” like he’s trying to convince himself, you’d get pretty drunk. But Johnny’s always been depicted as pretty intensely monogamous – cheating isn’t something he does, despite the character’s in-and-out of universe reputation. So he and Crystal just pine dramatically at each other until she leaves the team.

There’s a lot to unpack in the newlywed issues – not in the least the fact that, despite their married status, we never see Johnny and Alicia in bed together, not even in a non-sexual context. If you compare them to Peter Parker and Mary Jane Watson, who were also married in 1987, the difference is shocking:

The comics leave no doubt that the Parkers were sleeping together, but Johnny and Alicia? The only real evidence on page they’re having sex is that when Lyja initially lies about the baby, Johnny certainly seems to think it’s possible. Again I note the lack of chemistry between Johnny and Alicia in the early days. They’re almost laughably unsexy, especially for a pair of newlyweds, moving into their own apartment only to move back to the Baxter Building (and back with Johnny’s family) almost immediately. There’s a real lacking sense of intimacy between them, coupled with Johnny’s emotional affair with Crystal. Then there’s the entirety of Fantastic Four #332 where, while captured by rogue Watcher and held unconscious, Johnny dreams of his perfect world, wherein – and I’m not joking about any of this – he dreams that Franklin unintentionally used his reality warping powers to make Alicia love Johnny instead of Ben, ultimately undoing the changes and reuniting Ben and Alicia.

“He – made us fall in love–!” “He made us get married – live together –!”

With or without the retcon in place, Johnny’s obviously unhappy in his marriage. It’s interesting to think of this issue as him subconsciously recognizing that he’s being manipulated, but unable to pinpoint the source of that manipulation. He knows he’s been forced into the marriage, but he doesn’t know how. But this issue makes it very clear that at least subconsciously, he feels forced.

If the marriage had been working in the story, they never would have pulled the retcon and revealed Johnny was married to a Skrull impostor. But it wasn’t, and there’s a problem with Johnny and divorce – which is simply that he’s never broken up with anyone before in his life. (Literally, he’s never ended one of his relationships.) If you view his expressing regret in FF #257 as a clumsy attempt at it, then you can see how quickly that got shut down. Johnny is the unhappy party in the relationship, but he would feel like getting a divorce would be a failure – instead he dreams up a scenario where Alicia was never REALLY in love with him at all.

Besides, it’s not DRAMATIC to have them just say the marriage wasn’t working and call it off. It’s a comic book! It’s supposed to be aliens and clones and robots! I actually don’t think the retcon in itself is bad. It’s everything that comes after it.

In Fantastic Four #356, the cracks begin to show. (The reveal of the retcon is very sudden; I’m going to assume that the decision was made as of the writing of this issue.) “Alicia” expresses her doubt at being able to fix a melted sculpture and is unable to recognize her stepfather, the Puppet Master. In #357, Reed invents a machine that would register the specific brainwaves of the inhabitants of the Baxter Building yadda yadda to prevent intruders and “Alicia” reacts with hostility.

“I would prefer to have Johnny and me move out of here… than to subject myself to a needless health risk!”

This bit has always been very telling to me: with her assumed identity under threat, Lyja threatens to separate Johnny from his family if they don’t comply with her wishes. This would also be why she tells Johnny she has some “news” for him (implying that she’s pregnant) before Ben and the Puppet Master reveal her identity: she can tell him she’s pregnant, then say the Baxter Building is dangerous. New York is dangerous. They should go somewhere else. She’s lived with him for a while now; she knows he doesn’t have any solid support network aside from his family. If he’s cut off from that, he’s essentially isolated, an even easier victim.

(When Lyja says she loves Johnny, I believe the character’s declarations to be genuine. There’s certainly no conflicting statements that say otherwise. And it makes sense that she would love him. Lyja in her own way is a victim – she was selected for the mission because of a failed relationship with her commanding officer. She was told she would be playing the part of Ben’s girlfriend. She was doubtlessly made to expect a monster, since the Skrulls view the Fantastic Four as their enemies – instead she ended up with Johnny, who is warm and kind and sweet. At this point in the story I don’t think she wanted to isolate him specifically to be cruel, just that she saw the end coming and wanted to preserve things as long as possible. But his continued fantasizing about being with other people, coupled with his anguished declarations that he has to honor his vows as a superhero, don’t exactly spell reciprocation of these feelings when you look at them up close, and he was manipulated into this relationship for ulterior motives, and it doesn’t negate that what Lyja attempted to do to preserve her assumed identity was abusive on top of the way she’d already infiltrated his life. Lyja can love Johnny and do terrible things to him, which, intentionally or unintentionally, was what was written.)

Anyway, yadda yadda, Ben and Alicia’s stepfather reveal Lyja’s Skrull status, Lyja says she’s pregnant with Johnny’s baby, the Fantastic Four and Lyja go to space to rescue the real Alicia from where she’s been held in suspended animation by the Skrulls, a battle ensues and Lyja appears to die, confessing with her last breath to Johnny that she’d lied about being pregnant. For the sake of the argument, I will note that Johnny says he loves her as she’s “dying” – but to be fair, he thinks she’s dying, and he’s barely had time to process everything, as evidenced by the fact that when they recover the real Alicia, he still attempts to act like her husband, even knowing he was never married to her. I think it’s fair to say he’s in shock and I don’t think you can take that statement of love as solid proof of his romantic feelings towards Lyja specifically, given all of the other evidence. The Fantastic Four return to Earth with the real Alicia, and publicly announce her sudden divorce from Johnny, since of course she was never involved with him and is in fact still in love with Ben. Alicia is notably traumatized by the swap – Lyja sold her apartment, her works. Alicia canonically feels violated by the incident, and I have got to say, her reactions are some of the few during this period that feel realistic.

“All of my old clothes – everything I’ve ever owned – was tainted by that alien! You can’t imagine the sense of violation I feel!”

Johnny enrolls in ESU and tries to move on with his life. Except this is comics, so, haha, nice try. Lyja, not dead after all, violently attacks Johnny on the ESU campus, attempting to murder him for “abandoning” her and “their baby”, which she now claims is real. In the ensuing battle, Johnny’s forced to go Nova to save his life, and in the process he burns down the ESU campus.

If you’re familiar with Johnny, you know that this is his worst fear realized: his control stripped, his powers doing immense damage. He can’t be sure at this point that he HASN’T burned hundreds of innocents to death. (It is conveniently stated later than, somehow, no one was hurt in the sudden explosion, but that’s always felt very handwave-y.)

When Johnny’s taken into police custody, he sees Lyja in the crowd and panics since after all she did just try to kill him. Afraid for his life – afraid of her – he flames on and escapes police custody, ending up a fugitive for a matter of time. At a certain point, Lyja ends up allied with the Four. Why would they allow this? It’s difficult to say. Because she claims she’s carrying Johnny’s baby. Because Reed is distracted with other matters. Because Sue’s evil Malice persona is starting to reassert itself. Because Ben’s secretly so grateful the real Alicia didn’t actually marry Johnny. Because, frankly, at this point in time: the writing is just not very good.

Okay, like. It’s hard to tell at this point what Lyja honestly believes. She’s been surgically altered without her consent, given laser powers and been implanted with an egg she would, after its removal from her, convince Johnny was their child but was actually a monster designed to kill the Fantastic Four. Honestly, I’m not going to read this part again, and it’s NOT crystal clear within the main Fantastic Four text, but I do believe at one point Lyja may have genuinely believed herself pregnant before the truth was revealed to her, but either way she knew significantly before the hatching and intentionally chose not to tell Johnny in order to be close to him. She definitely knew before she “gave birth”, even going so far as to punish him for being taken aback by the egg. 

“My new friend here is more attentive and more attractive than you ever were!”

The writing here suffers from two things. First, there’s a lot of showing and not telling. We never SEE Johnny reacting badly to the egg, only thinking wistfully of how it’ll be nice to hold his child when it hatches. Second, I suspect the creative team had very little planned ahead and were making things up as they went along, and that they hadn’t yet decided WHAT was in the egg, hence Lyja’s very vague “I MUST tell him the TRUTH” statements to herself. (She does not tell him the truth.)

It also might explain the truly baffling writing decisions in a Namor comic published during the egg baby period: in it, a shapeshifter disguises herself as Sue to sleep with Namor. When Namor discovers what has happened, he – and everyone else, both the characters and the narrative – are very clear on the fact that Namor was raped by this shapeshifter. All of this happens with Lyja and Johnny standing right there, and the comic doesn’t even seem to realize the problem. Lyja even weeps over the fact that her fake egg baby could have been harmed, which could, of course, be explained at the time that the creative team on Fantastic Four hadn’t decided that the baby was for sure a fake yet.

That being said, the baby WAS confirmed to be a fake, one that Lyja definitely knew about at this point, and everything that came before has to now be viewed with that light. And it’s disturbing to me that neither Johnny’s family nor the book itself ever treats Lyja like his rapist, even when the  same situation is applied to a different character. At worst it treats her as obsessed with him, but in a harmless sort of way. But that wasn’t what was written when you actually look at it. She explicitly used the egg – which actually housed a dangerous monster – as an excuse to violate his space, to be close to him when she knew otherwise he wouldn’t want to be around her.

“After months of bitterness, you and I had finally found some warmth. Was it so wrong to crave that?”

In a word? Yes.

I’ve always liked this scene, as much as I guess I can like any of this stretch of Fantastic Four, in #392, where Johnny finally explodes. “Did you honestly expect we could ever have a life together?”

(This is one of the reasons I find it hard to read comics in the MC2 continuity; I’m trying to have a good time reading about Peter and MJ’s teenage daughter and every once in a while it gets shoved in my face again that, oh yeah, this is the continuity where they decided to have Johnny married to his rapist and stalker.)

But Johnny’s anger towards Lyja – for invading his life, for lying about a baby in order to be close to him not once but twice, for violating every aspect of his life – is treated as almost childish by not only Lyja, but also by Sue, who tells Lyja she’s welcome to stay at the Baxter Building even when Lyja’s lies and her refusal to let Johnny go have chased Johnny from team and from his family in order to get away from her.

But Lyja doesn’t stay at the Baxter Building. Instead, she creates a new identity to follow Johnny, first just around New York:

And then out to Oklahoma, where he’s accompanied ESU student’s Bridget O’Neill’s archaeology dig as an excuse to catch up with his friend Wyatt Wingfoot.

Stalking! Extremely possessive behavior! How romantic! And by “how romantic” I mean yikes. It’s kind of unbelievable to me that anyone wrote this without the narrative explicitly condemning Lyja’s actions – but it doesn’t. If anything, it treats it as quirky. But the idea that someone could attack you, lie to you, attempt to manipulate you – and then turn around and start stalking you, wearing an entirely different face, when you refuse to continue to let them in your life is completely horrifying. 

I think part of the reason this might all be so weird is because it was written by men who a) felt uncomfortable that they’d written a male character, especially one like Johnny, whose youth and emotional vulnerability are often played up, as the victim in this narrative and tried, unsuccessfully, to pull away from it instead of following it to any logical conclusion b) can’t really imagine this kind of violence being perpetuated against them as men, or, if they can, find something titillating about the idea of a beautiful woman committing it or c) buy completely into the fantasy of having a hot alien chick obsessed with you, ignoring everything else in favor of that, like this Mark Millar interview seems to imply:

That’s the least Johnny dilemma of all time, by the way, in that it is a description of Peter and Felicia’s early relationship, but moving on.

Lyja, under the subtly-named guise of Laura Greene, proceeds to date Johnny in her new identity, while simultaneously working with the Fantastic Four as herself, and it’s not any less bizarrely written or creepy than the rest of this, not in the least because while several other characters discover Laura Greene’s dual identity, no one tells Johnny. Not Ben. Not Psychic Teen Franklin (long story): 

“And if I tell him… it means betraying her trust!”

He’s your uncle, Psychic Teen Franklin, and I’m pretty sure telling him he’s been tricked into unknowingly dating his stalker overrules that, but okay.

Roberta, the Fantastic Four’s robotic receptionist, goes through this twice in both Fantastic Four and Avengers Unplugged:

“I hate having to date Johnny this clandestine manner, but if he knew I was really his shape-shifting ex-wife, he would never see me!”

I am going to scream.

It’s totally cool that Reed built a robot receptionist with sensors delicate enough to catch any impostor who might slip by, but apparently never installed anything like an ethics routine.

“Curse you, Johnny Storm, for making me sneak around this way!!”

That’s right, it’s apparently Johnny’s fault Lyja has taken on an entirely new identity in order to keep herself in his life when he told her in no uncertain terms they had no future together after she took the form of his friend in order to spy on his family, used his grief over the death of his niece to get close to him, married him in that guise without his knowledge of her real identity, attempted to separate him from family, tried to kill him, causing him to burn down a campus in order to save his life, and lied not once but twice about a baby, once when what the “baby” actually was was a monster designed to kill both him and his family. Totally weird how he doesn’t want her in his life. Look, the writing here is atrocious, but that doesn’t stop this from being spectacularly victim blaming behavior.

Another weird thing about this period is how, while Johnny and “Laura” are dating, she doesn’t really seem to like him, at least not how he is, criticizing his attempts to compliment her:

“Trite, simple-minded and unimaginative – but, still, rather sweet!”

And, bizarrely, almost emulating her life as “Alicia”, dismissing his suggestion of a movie as “pedestrian” and instead suggesting they go to a sculpture gallery, where Johnny is clearly uncomfortable:

Not that this period of comics seemed particularly concerned with realistic emotional reactions, but being in a sculpture gallery would have to dredge up unpleasant feelings for Johnny. Nevertheless, Lyja pushes for it, even when he expresses his discomfort.

tl;dr, because we’re getting to the end of this, eventually Johnny discovers Laura is Lyja. It’s wrapped up very quickly, because there’s a world-threatening crisis going on. To sum it up, the Fantastic Four and the Avengers would after this be trapped for a period of time in a pocket universe created by Franklin Richards. Lyja was not trapped with them, as they were essentially living out a reboot of their early days. When they returned to the main universe, Johnny remarks briefly on Lyja’s disappearance, but she wasn’t heard from again until the Secret Invasion event in 2008, more than ten years after her last appearance. (Secret Invasion fittingly involved a Skrull invasion force having been secretly planted on Earth for years.) 

During Secret Invasion Lyja, in the guise of Sue, launches the Baxter Building (housing, at the time, Johnny, Ben, and the children) into the Negative Zone. When confronted by Johnny, who believed her to be Sue at the moment, she attempted to convince him that Ben had been replaced by a Skrull.

Okay, in the interests of ending this incredibly long post: what happens next is that they fight a Negative Zone inhabitant who attacks them, they kiss, it’s weird, Lyja blames Johnny for never contacting her, saying he could’ve looked up Laura Greene in the phone book, Johnny remains rightfully mad at Lyja, but is reluctant to leave her in the Negative Zone at the end. 

The problem is still this initial scene. Lyja later says she took Johnny to the Negative Zone to protect him, as she’d been ordered by the Skrulls to kill him. But if that’s true – why try initially to trick him into believing she was Sue? Why try to convince him that Ben was a Skrull? What was she planning on doing if he’d bought it? Was the goal to take Ben out of the picture – again, to remove his support network and leave him alone with her? And the two comments on his intelligence – “[Thinking]’s not exactly your forte” and “You’re many things, Johnny, but genius is not one of them.” Part of my problem with Lyja is that ever since she made her initial return after her apparent death, there’s always been an edge of cruelty to her interactions with Johnny. She belittles him even as she repeatedly invades his life, essentially telling him he’s not good enough and also that he can’t escape. It’s an uncomfortable read on a lot of levels.

Lyja ultimately stays in the Negative Zone to find herself. It’s not a bad exit for the character, because the character does need to find herself beyond this incredibly toxic dynamic – if I could be sure it was the exit. I know Robinson had planned to bring her back had his run not been cancelled, and given how she’s addressed – by Johnny telling Ben he doesn’t think he’s ever been in love the way Ben and Alicia are, but that “his Alicia” is the closest he’s ever gotten – makes me doubt that all of the abuse was going to be, you know, actually addressed. (It also again frames Johnny’s marriage to “Alicia” as a happy one, and not one fraught with doubt and a deep, if never fully explored, desire on Johnny’s part to have it dissolved.) 

Having written all of this, I do have to say I really doubt it’s Lyja and do think the “mystery woman” in question is probably a new character. It’s just 1) I live in fear and 2) Lyja was referenced at the beginning of Two-in-One #2, though likely just because as I’ve noted on other posts discussing Ben and Johnny’s recent separation, the beginning of the Johnny/”Alicia” relationship is the only other significant serious fight between Ben and Johnny.

tl;dr your local Traincat talks herself into a crisis over one line, then talks herself out of it while writing incredibly long reply anon probably wasn’t asking for. Lyja and Johnny’s relationship is not a romance and I would really like to stop seeing it framed as such and, instead of the weird revisionist history that seems to pop up regarding the character, I’d like for comics to admit that Johnny is the victim in this situation rather than doubling down on the “oh! The Human Torch! That playboy!” myth. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[hgfstreamchats]

The Legend of the Titanic & Tentacolino

Hello! Me Hello there, night human! thenightetc So... I haven't heard of this. What are we in for...? Me A mess. thenightetc *anticipation, yet trepidation also* thenightetc Quick, put it back-- Me Nothing to see here. thenightetc 😬 And he just happens to sit there! Me What a coincidence! Jalaperilo yo! Me Jalaperilo human! Hello! Jalaperilo i have 0 work tomorrow so i can hang all night! thenightetc Hello! Nice. Me Glorious! You won't want to miss a second of this one.

The Ramsey human can smell lies. Jalaperilo the ramsey human is one of the best of us. tells professionals when they are idiots, encourages those that are learning Me Exactly the way it should be. thenightetc ...Alright, I know how food looks doesn't necessarily indicate how it'll taste, but Jalaperilo what the f are chitlits? thenightetc They're... pig intestines Jalaperilo ah thenightetc Boiled and fried Jalaperilo and microwaved apparently thenightetc Oh! THAT'S where that's from! Me I always wondered! Jalaperilo he's so different on american tv thenightetc Red velvet cake is delicious Jalaperilo it is I'm gonna cry thenightetc ....:< Me I like to think I've learned to spot a good human, and he was one. thenightetc Yeah. Jalaperilo oh yes his acting is amazing Me It really is. thenightetc They may not be effective at villainy, but they make a wonderful band. Me We'll just...pass on the video where he's singing on his death bed. Onto the giant octopus movie? thenightetc ...Yes, let's. Jalaperilo what is this? thenightetc Hello! eggshellwhitesucks Hi! Me Hello! Jalaperilo yo! eggshellwhitesucks I’m the anon who demanded a terrible movie and I’m pleased Me """"Whistle"""" thenightetc We just started. Me Happy to deliver! Thank you for prompting this awful thing! eggshellwhitesucks Why are there so many movies about mice being put into terrible situations Me Maybe the mice deserve it for some ancient atrocity? eggshellwhitesucks hey look it’s discount marissa faireborn Starscreamapillar Oh good, I did not miss the madness. Me Unicron forbid! thenightetc Aw, he even has a little sailor suit. eggshellwhitesucks that’s just lazy writing thenightetc What is that hat Starscreamapillar Someone ate part of it. They are rodents. Jalaperilo they said they wwere in england, but if theyre picking up europeans, they'd be in france thenightetc That's right, this is a soccer movie now Me This certainly has something to do with anything. Starscreamapillar Mouse soccer definitely belongs in a titanic movie. Jalaperilo they had to fill the movie with innanity cause the story is lacking thenightetc Oh! Cats! Starscreamapillar Who could possibly be the bad guy. It is a mystery. Jalaperilo just her hand? thenightetc Looking forward to this descending into a horror movie as the cats hunt down and brutally murder every single mouse character eggshellwhitesucks I hope this ends up like the bee movie and she falls in love with a mouse Me Oh look, it's the personification of Vos. Starscreamapillar . . . Me Well, the fun part, at any rate. Starscreamapillar Good save. Jalaperilo nut him! she looks so generic eggshellwhitesucks OH was that completely necessary Jalaperilo nothing in this film is Starscreamapillar That is unsettling. thenightetc Well! Nothing distasteful about THAT. Me Close your mouth. eggshellwhitesucks Because everyone knows who that is thenightetc Oh, so he's saying his boss is too special to follow the rules. Jalaperilo looks like the animators cant animate dialogue, everything is spoken off camera Starscreamapillar Classy. eggshellwhitesucks The best part of the movie thus far Jalaperilo why havent they set off yet? Starscreamapillar They have to wave in three frames of animation per second. eggshellwhitesucks is this movie even about the titanic Jalaperilo this offends me eggshellwhitesucks tag urself I’m his eyepatch Jalaperilo i'm the entire cast being american Starscreamapillar Exclusive. Worldwide. Whaling rights. Because surely one man can grant those. Me I'm the wistful she-human in the painting. thenightetc Now that you mentioned the dialog thing I can't stop seeing it I'm the lamp. Starscreamapillar I am the broken CGI. thenightetc .... Jalaperilo haha! thenightetc That uh certainly is something. Jalaperilo this is where the dialogue animation budget went thenightetc Probably half their budget eggshellwhitesucks ...there’s still an hour left thenightetc oh my god THEY WERE JUST FLAT TEXTURES Jalaperilo oh god egg, why did you do thuis to us? Me Why is soccer mouse afting around with him anyway? He's not staff. thenightetc "mouse inspection board" Jalaperilo i'm not scottish, and this accent offends me to my soul thenightetc I'm pretty sure none of these mice are staff, per se eggshellwhitesucks he’s the spike witwicky of the movie Starscreamapillar Is he the one that sinks the ship, then? eggshellwhitesucks No that’s the iceberg, the best character thenightetc They're all stowaways. They're all stowaways. Starscreamapillar Are they even speaking actual words, or just vague, word-like noise? thenightetc ...What did her hair just do? You all saw that, right? Jalaperilo i was distracted by smut on my other screen eggshellwhitesucks I was going to respond to that with a comment but I’ve got nothing Jalaperilo then tey all die in the icy water eggshellwhitesucks I’m so proud of the icy water It deserves an award Me It's doing good work. Ew. Jalaperilo was this film originally another language? thenightetc .... Starscreamapillar A racist. Jalaperilo hahah! thenightetc So this IS like Bee Movie Starscreamapillar Only if it is reciprocated. eggshellwhitesucks Oh great they sing Starscreamapillar Those dolphins, and their fifty foot leaps. thenightetc Hoverdolphins. Starscreamapillar And floating. eggshellwhitesucks They escaped from Seaworld. Jalaperilo fuck off i hate everything that was just said eggshellwhitesucks Bad comment my apologies thenightetc Magic. Jalaperilo what you say? Me I laughed at it. eggshellwhitesucks Oh it’s an educational film it has nothing to do with the titanic If they all live at the end I riot Starscreamapillar I think she is just insane, and there is no dolphin magic. Me I want all these characters to watch each other die. Jalaperilo she was prob high on mescaline as it was in most medicine back then eggshellwhitesucks That would certainly be more entertaining thenightetc hahahaha eggshellwhitesucks I like how you keep checking the time just to remind us how much longer we have to endure this thenightetc Getting some more mileage out of that model, I see Me Oh, it does that when I archive the chat. Starscreamapillar .... The frag is that? thenightetc oh my god A... shark-man. With a hat. A prison hat? eggshellwhitesucks I want to see him face off against the sharkticons Me I too want to see him die. thenightetc With any luck, "face off" is what would happen oh my god She just rolls with it Starscreamapillar Did she not tell them what she thinks? Me Mescaline: not even once. Starscreamapillar Two mice, truly the backup she needs to turn the tide of her unwanted marriage. thenightetc "Now that I know a couple of talking mice I just met are on my side" Jalaperilo youre on the same ship in the middle of the sea eggshellwhitesucks I just missed a good two minutes because I got a phone call. Can I have a recap? thenightetc "fascinating charisma" Jalaperilo ah, this was original italian thenightetc Well, the minion guy apparently is in league with sharks, and the mice revealed themselves to this lady and offered to help her get out of her engagement ThebesAce Sorry I'm late--whoa, is this the second animated Titantic movie? MAKES IT EASY Me It is! Starscreamapillar Well then. Problem solved. Jalaperilo the besace! thenightetc Oh, god, he's still got her glove. Starscreamapillar Stop smelling that glove, it is weird. ThebesAce Jalapero! eggshellwhitesucks Titanic 2: the boat is back this time with vengeance thenightetc I bet smelling isn't all he's been doing. Me He's doing all kinds of things to that glove. ThebesAce (I know it's jalaperilo but I like going jalapero in my head) (SPICY DOG) Jalaperilo knock out, please, i'm trying to eat ice cream i got it lol ThebesAce I mean, it's not wrong okay, it's wrong, but it's not incorrect thenightetc ...So he CAN talk Starscreamapillar And then he ate those mice. eggshellwhitesucks He believes in a functionalist society. Me Smiley believes that some bots should be smelted for the greater good. ThebesAce or he doesn't want humans asking questions about him coughing up sailor outfits thenightetc Now, what about the cats. Oh, god, the soccer thing's going to die into it eggshellwhitesucks I’m thinking of a particularly horrific scene from the great mouse detective Starscreamapillar Oh yes, the tiny, mouse sized soccer ball sent him flying. Jalaperilo what is actually going on, cause i keep looking away for a few seconds and i have no idea whats happenng ThebesAce shenanigans shenanigans are happening thenightetc I think it was a regular soccer ball that the mouse somehow kicked hard enough Starscreamapillar It is all nonsense, even when one tries to pay attention. eggshellwhitesucks All that matters is they are en route to a giant ice berg Jalaperilo cant come quick enough THERE IS A SEQUEL ThebesAce YUP TENTACOLINO Jalaperilo tentacle what? eggshellwhitesucks i‘m so buying these films on dvd ThebesAce the sequel, it's called Tentacolino Jalaperilo thats up knock out street Me Don't tempt me into streaming it. ThebesAce You mean you don't want to stream the tale of toyland Atlantis? Me ... Starscreamapillar . . . thenightetc voyeur mice Me Well, we're watching it. And I've no objections to watching it tonight, if no one else does. thenightetc Let's do it! Me Beautiful! thenightetc Was that a pun? Jalaperilo might as well, we've come this far thenightetc Mice-tro Starscreamapillar Sure, I have not suffered enough in my lifetime. Jalaperilo this is our collective punishment for the terrible things we all did in the past eggshellwhitesucks I’m home alone all weekend to watch the dogs and my mom is gonna be like “what’d you do last night” I can’t wait to introduce her to this wonderful world of cinema Me I like how he seems to have given up on the female mouse and settled for her brother. eggshellwhitesucks Iceberg. Roll credits. Jalaperilo can he understand them? Starscreamapillar I have been exploded from the inside out, and I still count these films as more painful. ThebesAce I am also in for the sequel and apparently yes Yes he can Jalaperilo he didnt cry in the moonlights into the sea or whatever the fuck it was ThebesAce no but true love or some crap like that thenightetc I think the mouse was saying something about how if he marries her, he'll be able to understand them? eggshellwhitesucks Oh great. I’m so glad Smiley gets a girlfriend because we totally needed that. thenightetc I'm just glad there's not going to be a human/mouse romance after all eggshellwhitesucks Oh I completely forgot about the eyepatch villain Jalaperilo i thought the sailor mouse and the football mouse were a couple ThebesAce this movie isn't nearly that interesting eggshellwhitesucks Time to write fanfiction Jalaperilo the only piece of fanfiction to be written of this eggshellwhitesucks Didn’t they like just meet Starscreamapillar Have they actually said a whole sentence to each other? thenightetc I'm not sure they have. Me True love means never having to say literally anything to each other at any point. Jalaperilo theyre from the romeo and juliet school of romance thenightetc He had his dog steal her glove, he kept the glove to... smell... and then they danced eggshellwhitesucks The mice are the real villains. They just interrupted Smiley’s wonderful sleep. Me He was dreaming of a better movie! thenightetc Oh. New characters. Hooray. Jalaperilo cant wait to see these gypsy stereotypes eggshellwhitesucks Boyfriend. Smiley gets a boyfriend. Me Well, that's refreshingly...something. thenightetc "Mice! Wearing little clothes!" Jalaperilo gotta get back to my comics eggshellwhitesucks Well that’s totally a good idea thenightetc Please let them electrocute themselves Jalaperilo so, god i must be really flakey tonight. WHY do they want her to mary the eyepatch guy? Me This won't backfire at all. Starscreamapillar So that is why the ship sank. Evil mice sabotage. eggshellwhitesucks YESS THE ICEBERG thenightetc The eyepatch guy wants her father's whaling rights eggshellwhitesucks I’ve been waiting the entire movie for the iceberg thenightetc Again, why does the shark have a prison hat and patch Jalaperilo the iseberg is here to cleanse us of our sins thenightetc And hands? Starscreamapillar Because he is a bad guy. ThebesAce THAT'S HOW SHARK-HUNTING WORKS wait how did they understand the sharks, anyway Starscreamapillar Moonbeam slag. thenightetc He has stripes, too eggshellwhitesucks So this was the inspiration for finding nemo Jalaperilo why come up with the moonbeam shit if everyone is gonna understand animals thenightetc How is the hat styaing on Who put a shark in jail Starscreamapillar Because the humans who made this are also high on mescaline. eggshellwhitesucks Magic Jalaperilo haha i feel im on mescaline Me I like his large, visible claspers. thenightetc ..... eggshellwhitesucks I want you guys to know my dog is equally as disappointed in this film as me thenightetc *eyebrows* eggshellwhitesucks She fell asleep Jalaperilo your dog is a good judge of character and film thenightetc *eyebrows* eggshellwhitesucks She fell asleep Jalaperilo your dog is a good judge of character and film Me A very good dog. Jalaperilo many pets for doggo eggshellwhitesucks do they not realize that if the titanic sinks they too will die because of the icy cold waters or are they hoping to survive off of the marvelous breadfish thenightetc So he's like. A baby giant octopus Jalaperilo WHAT IS GOING ON??? tantacles. finally something for KO Me I'm in serious danger of losing my taste for tentacles. eggshellwhitesucks The shark is officially my favorite character. His manipulation tactics are wonderful. thenightetc And who can blame you? Jalaperilo i hate this octopus it looks fucking freaky thenightetc Got a little... dog nose ThebesAce don't worry, he suffers thenightetc nooooo, poor cat eggshellwhitesucks Death to the mice via the introduction of cat? Starscreamapillar Is he going to murder that old man? Jalaperilo we can only hope eggshellwhitesucks Man this really....sinks Starscreamapillar . . . Jalaperilo booo eggshellwhitesucks Almost as bad as the joke Ice to see eyepatch man again This movie is whaley bad Jalaperilo what they making him sign? Starscreamapillar A will. ThebesAce This script needs a tuna-p. Me They should have cetacean-motion a better one. thenightetc Wait, the hat wasn't stuck on? ThebesAce Eh, I'd probably clam up about my involvement in this, unless I was a real sucker. eggshellwhitesucks I can’t believe they’re sinking the ship. It’s clearly octopied. thenightetc Hhahahaha Jalaperilo YOU CAUSED A MASACRE KID thenightetc And nobody saw fit to tell him before he did it This is a pearl of a movie. Me "LOT OF POOR PEOPLE AND CHILDREN, KID." ThebesAce it is when they manage to coral their animation and tell the story eggshellwhitesucks I do wish I knew what type of mascara the captain uses Jalaperilo they served a lot of nice drinks on the titanic. they all went down well with ice Me HAH! thenightetc I mull-ask why anyone thought this was a good idea. eggshellwhitesucks This movie just got good. Because they’re all going to die. Jalaperilo ssoon we will be free of this awful movie Me And onto its sequel. Its awful, awful sequel. Starscreamapillar Ah yes, plenty of room for everyone. That is historically accurate. ThebesAce Don't want to bring the mood down, talking about the TITANTIC TITANIC* eggshellwhitesucks Well, ship happens. Jalaperilo how do you do a sequel? do they do a return trip on the lusitania? ThebesAce If it mast, it mast thenightetc I'm getting a sinking feeling about this. eggshellwhitesucks I heard the salads on the titanic used excellent iceberg lettuce. Me The script just falls a-port. thenightetc Well, I am looking forward to the sea-quel Starscreamapillar I hate all of you. thenightetc 😁 Starscreamapillar He's dead. Excellent. thenightetc What an electrifying solution. ThebesAce Guess we really sunk your opinions of us, huh eggshellwhitesucks Icee dead mice. Jalaperilo cant wait for this to fin-ish thenightetc That is definitely how octopi move, galloping across the ocean floor. eggshellwhitesucks Wait the octopus’ name is literally tentacles? Jalaperilo they dead eggshellwhitesucks That’s REALLY lazy writing. Me Casual sexism, lovely. Jalaperilo elizabeths full name is elizabeth human-woman Starscreamapillar Finally, someone acknowledges that it is a mouse. thenightetc And that there's something weird about that. eggshellwhitesucks Row row row your boat gently down the freezing waters you’ll inevitably die in Starscreamapillar The Titanic kraken. How could we forget? Jalaperilo didnt half the people die in the sinking? ThebesAce so do dolphins just. Fly? thenightetc ...Did he just Take a breath Me He did. Starscreamapillar Yes. eggshellwhitesucks Oh by all means save the instruments for incidental music thenightetc Well, THANK GOD everyone's safe! Starscreamapillar And then no one died. Except for that one mouse. And I guess those three idiots. Jalaperilo i hate this ThebesAce my, I feel such tension for their safety thenightetc I'm glad nobody died in the MOST FAMOUS SHIPWRECK OF ALL TIME. Me I certainly care what happens to them. eggshellwhitesucks Jut say “I never want to let go” and get it over with ThebesAce I am so invested in this cardboard cutouts of people and animals Starscreamapillar DEad. Jalaperilo where the fuck did this whale come from Starscreamapillar No such thing as hypothermia. Jalaperilo deus ex whales eggshellwhitesucks Hear that kids? The next time your boat sinks in freezing cold water jump in and die of hypothermia instead! Jalaperilo lemme guess, thats the uss california ThebesAce well I mean that did actually happen historically, but it sure didn't end happily Jalaperilo *ss Starscreamapillar I am glad he is dead. No.... eggshellwhitesucks He comes back as zombie octopus in the sequel thenightetc Well then ThebesAce the sequel is a hot mess of acid-fueled bad ideas eggshellwhitesucks And this film wasn’t? thenightetc Oh, so it's in the spirit of the original. ThebesAce no, compared to the original, the original is boring thenightetc noooooo, the cats ThebesAce the sequel's where they put the HILARIOUSLY bad ideas thenightetc ...His name is "Don Juan"? Starscreamapillar Of course it is. ThebesAce yes, because this is an Italian production, and they thought that was appropriate thenightetc Welllllll I'm sure their marriage is going to be just fine. Me Smiley and his boyfriend are the only acceptable couple in this movie. eggshellwhitesucks I concur thenightetc Thank god they gave that mouse tits. eggshellwhitesucks Wow this films soundtrack sure is wonderful Starscreamapillar But only two. Instead of the twelve she ought to have. Jalaperilo HAHAHA eggshellwhitesucks Hahahahaha....no Jalaperilo threesome eggshellwhitesucks I just heard the cinema sins laugh play in my head Me Beat the horses to make this tragedy right! ThebesAce I feel like Cinema Sins' sin counter would combust trying to tackle this movie Jalaperilo why is this film still going? thenightetc Oh good, more terrible CGI Starscreamapillar An unmoving mannequin crowd. Jalaperilo eat them eggshellwhitesucks I....I’m boycotting for the lack of death thenightetc And nobody's concerned about a giant octopus grabbing people out of the crowd Jalaperilo beig fukken stoned eggshellwhitesucks I didn’t need to see that the animated mouse ass Starscreamapillar That mouse made all that up. Me Sometimes they meet up for "fishing trips." thenightetc That explains a surprising amount He didn't want to upset the kids so he told them nobody died. ThebesAce yup. Starscreamapillar They also lived for eighty years. ThebesAce lot easier than telling him he was a stowaway shiprat who clung to a liferaft until he saw the shore thenightetc ...THIRD animated Titanic Movie? eggshellwhitesucks I’m switching to a computer because the sheer horror of this film killed my phone’s battery Me As well as something precious inside of all of us. ThebesAce YUP COME JOIN US IN ACID FUELED SEQUEL LAND thenightetc Oh, good, they kept the CGI model. Starscreamapillar I am fairly certain it is known where the wreck of the Titanic is. No searching necessary. thenightetc ...oh, they're just recapping for the credits. nevermind thenightetc "It's in just the right position now!" teehee Jalaperilo i had to go deal with some noisy ass bug in my room what did i miss? ThebesAce absolutely nothing Jalaperilo oh good lol ThebesAce they recapped, then bathysphere to find the Titanic Jalaperilo bathysphere? Starscreamapillar Somehow, despite the entire lack of quality of the first film, this one manages to look worse. thenightetc Why's his hat different ThebesAce it's that round diving thing with the lights coming out Me I miss Smiley's accent. And "Y." ThebesAce you attach it to a ship, dip it down as far as you can get it, then winch it back up Starscreamapillar It is a different dog, Smiley did and was replaced with Smile. thenightetc Wow, they extended themselves to ANIMATE the cgi! Jalaperilo so theyre going to go get the titanic? Me He ran off with his Scottish beast of a boyfriend. Jalaperilo are they gonna thenightetc Uh Jalaperilo ............ ThebesAce SO WHO WANTED THIS TITANIC MOVIE TO BE A MUSICAL thenightetc Where did he get that shirt ThebesAce BECAUSE YOU'RE GETTING A MUSICAL Starscreamapillar Oh good. It is a musical now. Me I like that this is apparently almost two hours long. Jalaperilo thebes, you sneak 2 hours to go get the titanic eggshellwhitesucks Oh this one's a musical. Wonderful. Jalaperilo his fin is unfortunately placed thenightetc Everything about this is unfortunate. Where did the hermit crab get glasses eggshellwhitesucks I can't wait to perform in this show. Jalaperilo haha thenightetc He IS half yellow eggshellwhitesucks Almost as much as I hate eggshell white Starscreamapillar That is why he has yellow on his stolen clothing. thenightetc Why is he stripping eggshellwhitesucks Clam down guys. ThebesAce why was he wearing clothes in the first place Jalaperilo whats with the oyster chorus ThebesAce now hold on, it took a lot for them to come out of their shells Jalaperilo wait, did i miss something, is the football mouse a girl? thenightetc Sharks hugging. eggshellwhitesucks The original voice actor came to his senses and decided he wouldn't do the sequel for purposes of his career. Jalaperilo why was there no background music thenightetc Why DOES he have a different hat than the other sharks Shouldn't there be water cominb in? Jalaperilo sharks arent evil thenightetc Isn't one of those things an air hose or something? Why are bubbles coming out of the sphere itself eggshellwhitesucks Because I'd much rather watch this film than Shark Week thenightetc Why does he need them to come with him to brush his--oh, of course, he can't reach his own teeth with his weird finhands Jalaperilo where is the music? what is the purpose of this scene? thenightetc Wow, everything about this makes sense Jalaperilo its too complicated and nothing is happening thenightetc So, all the air's definitely leaked out, right .................. Starscreamapillar . . . . Sure. Jalaperilo whaaaat thenightetc This sure is how everythign works Starscreamapillar The air they are wasting currently. Jalaperilo when does james cameron appear? thenightetc From the top. Jalaperilo haha Starscreamapillar I wish this was the undersea crevice Megatron was chucked into. He deserved this madness. eggshellwhitesucks I think I like this Tentacles a bit more. thenightetc Ha! Me He's got a pinch more grit. Jalaperilo its 3am and ive lost the plot Me Aerosol cans. Because of course. Starscreamapillar That is how bubbles work. thenightetc Sure is. That, too! eggshellwhitesucks OH MY GOD SEAHORSES ThebesAce THAT GALLOP WHAT Me "Oops." thenightetc "what's a dog" Jalaperilo they dead? Starscreamapillar If only. thenightetc Couldn't they just carry them up to the surface instead of taking them to Atlantis? Starscreamapillar No. They have to kidnap them. thenightetc Of course the octopus has trouble squeezing through slightly tight spaces. ThebesAce WELCOME TO TOYLAND ATLANTIS Starscreamapillar Wasn't there a Titanic involved in this search for the Titanic? ThebesAce YOU ARE ABOUT TO FIND OUT WHY I CALL IT SUCH eggshellwhitesucks "I'm dead" if only Jalaperilo but all dogs go to heaven Me I think I like this Smiley. ThebesAce You are doomed to eternal bathtime, Smiley Me New theory is that Smile is Smiley and Bow Dog's disappointment of a son. thenightetc Are these coffins Jalaperilo hahaha! headcanon accepted Me Oh no. Jalaperilo why she got a cowboy hat? thenightetc What, haven't you ever seen a nurse before? Minidress and cowboy hat are standard Jalaperilo oh no yeah, i remember my mum wearing a cowboy hat for the last 37 years thenightetc Um UM Jalaperilo WTF eggshellwhitesucks that's uhhh horrifying Jalaperilo WHY IS IT MOVING ThebesAce and we now enter the terrifying toyland-esque parts of the movie Me "The treatment" eggshellwhitesucks why does he have no face Jalaperilo the 'treatment' is a transorbital lobotony Starscreamapillar Kidnapped forever. thenightetc Uh Me "They go in through your nose and they let you keep the piece of brain they took out." thenightetc Why does the evil fish have a spring, though Jalaperilo what is it thenightetc Why is the Jalaperilo what is it thenightetc creature Jalaperilo i hate it thenightetc following him around "you know.... in case you want to sit on me" Jalaperilo DONT SIT ON IT Starscreamapillar Sit on his face. thenightetc SITS Jalaperilo it talks ThebesAce "You're trusting this to the pogo-ride freak of nature?!" "Hey!" "Pingo, you can bounce away your worries, but you can't bounce away the truth." thenightetc He's... "made of" silver? eggshellwhitesucks so he's a revolutionary thenightetc "oh we kill everyone who finds out" Me The surface is literally right there. eggshellwhitesucks They serve human beings who find Atlantis. as food ThebesAce the sound of a man who faces eternity with Pingo Starscreamapillar Certain Things. thenightetc "your... parties are always fantastic, sir" eggshellwhitesucks I want to shamelessly see her on a seahorse. Starscreamapillar That is a cowboy hat headscarf. thenightetc "It's such a pretty color, it must be safe!" Me Eight minutes later, they were all dead. Jalaperilo dont drink the coolaid Starscreamapillar Atlantis the mini-mall. eggshellwhitesucks So this IS a hallucination? Me Atlantis is tacky. eggshellwhitesucks the lost city of disappointment thenightetc So... are they underwater, or not? Jalaperilo ok.im tapping out. its 3:15 and nothing is happening in this movie Me Good call. Jalaperilo ciao! thenightetc Goodnight! Me Good night! Starscreamapillar Rest well. eggshellwhitesucks Hope you dream of the Titanic and mice! thenightetc That is some bad interlacing Jalaperilo why curse me like that eggs? bye! thenightetc Toys. Me I like how we never did learn what "the treatment" consisted of. thenightetc They're human-sized? eggshellwhitesucks .......Zlatko.... Detroit: Become Human. Starscreamapillar I'd rather not know what the Treatment entailed. eggshellwhitesucks I'd like to see their names on a tombstone. thenightetc "very personal" eeeerrrrrrrr.... eggshellwhitesucks Smiley's okay. He's got a boyfriend back home. thenightetc Please don't be an orgy Did one of the dancers just disappear? Me "It was not strong." thenightetc ..."always stay awake" Starscreamapillar . . . . eggshellwhitesucks I think Soundwave would enjoy this number. Starscreamapillar I am not high enough for this. Me ...I'm sending it to him. CONSORT. Starscreamapillar That is not how to break the kidnapping gently to them. eggshellwhitesucks Tentacolino- Pingo's Song Tentacolino- Pingo's Song - Got to be one of the worst musical numbers within a film I've seen. From the movie 'Tentacolino'. thenightetc Right? "mythical" Hahhahaha Starscreamapillar Don Juan is much too high for this. thenightetc Either they're taking this remarkably well, or they're sucking up so he won't suspect they're going to try to escape eggshellwhitesucks NO SMILEY HAS A BOYFRIEND. Starscreamapillar Not anymore. Me No, no! Remember? He's Smile, their garbage offspring. thenightetc Uh eggshellwhitesucks Oh. I missed that plot aspect. thenightetc Just... what this movie needed Starscreamapillar Sure, trust the rodent with the hook hand and eye patch. thenightetc ...How many rats are down here, anyway? Actually why are there ANY eggshellwhitesucks I also don't trust the extremely feminine dog. thenightetc Is this a honeypot Me If it's not, then what the scrap's going on here? And this is *why* he's their disappointment child. eggshellwhitesucks Oh that's ruff. Starscreamapillar Aren't they dead yet? eggshellwhitesucks Buster wouldn't pull a stunt like this. wait.... there's water underneath the water? Spongebob logic, great. Starscreamapillar They keep Atlantis full of air, for no good reason. thenightetc Maybe they... still have to breathe air some of the time?? Me GAH. thenightetc Uh Is he SHAVED eggshellwhitesucks This is definitely an image that will haunt me.... for the rest of my life. Starscreamapillar How are they prisoners? They left. thenightetc Can't they just swim up ThebesAce you'd think! okay, this rat is talking sense Starscreamapillar He's not wrong... thenightetc A bit, yeah eggshellwhitesucks He can't be any scarier than this movie. or the shaved rat thenightetc Feh, they only "saved" you so they could kidnap you. You don't owe them anything. Wow, mean. Starscreamapillar Why must it grunt while it follows him? thenightetc It wants to remind him it's there. Following him. In case he wants to sit down. eggshellwhitesucks but screwdrivers are useful thenightetc Uh Starscreamapillar . . . . I hate this. All we have to do is win. Yes. It is that easy. thenightetc Wow, I didn't know you could just *opt out* of losing! Starscreamapillar If only us Decepticons had known. thenightetc I bet you feel silly now. Starscreamapillar Immeasurably. eggshellwhitesucks You just needed to steal the elixir of life. thenightetc "Everything?" the dog asks uncomfortably, thinking back to his encounter with his lady friend eggshellwhitesucks Back to his old habits I see oh my god this movie is longer than the first Starscreamapillar The suffering can never end. thenightetc The wink. thenightetc The other rats didn't see him clearly holding a duplicate flask? Starscreamapillar No. Because they are stupid. eggshellwhitesucks They went to the Atlantian school of being good at something. eggshellwhitesucks Be in this movie. That's what you did to deserve this. Me ...Well, then? thenightetc There's no lid on that flask eggshellwhitesucks And then there'll be an excellent third installment in this series Starscreamapillar No. I will fling this planet into the sun before I allow it. eggshellwhitesucks ah yes the alternate universe where rats and sharks rule the universe, sounds ideal ThebesAce well. compared to Pingo eggshellwhitesucks how did they survive.... didn't they almost drown in the last film Starscreamapillar This is a different one eyed man. He has a different name. thenightetc What, really? eggshellwhitesucks I missed so much of this movie's non-existent plot. Starscreamapillar Sadly so. thenightetc That would be "hitting", Smile. eggshellwhitesucks There's still 40 minutes of this movie left. Shorely we can come up with some great puns to pass the time. Starscreamapillar Men in barrels! The most deadly foe. Me This movie deserved to end an hour and five minutes ago. thenightetc I wonder if they feel gill-ty about conspiring to keep all those rats there against their will. eggshellwhitesucks Stop TOYing with my emotions in this way. thenightetc Wow. Did you know... that clothes can be removed...? Starscreamapillar What the frag is this nonsense??? He did it. The curse is broken. Me What a character arc it was. thenightetc He could have taken that wig off at any time. eggshellwhitesucks I think he looked fine before. ThebesAce this is like a rejected pokemon movie or something at this point eggshellwhitesucks I still can't figure out what the yellow thing is. thenightetc That's the laziest fucking wave animation loop eggshellwhitesucks Is he an otter? Starscreamapillar I think a stingray. thenightetc I thought a manta ray? eggshellwhitesucks Oh makes sense. thenightetc With uh arms for some reason eggshellwhitesucks It's the Titanic. Starscreamapillar Convenient amnesia ray. So the kidnapping was very deliberate. eggshellwhitesucks the Titanic 2: electric boogaloo Me Titanic 2: Titanic Junior, Son of Titanic thenightetc I think he already knows how to punch you on the nose. eggshellwhitesucks Poor Representation matters? ThebesAce WELL THAT'S NOT GRAPHIC Starscreamapillar No they won't, they They're rats. thenightetc "haha, oh, the treatment kills you if you go to the surface." eggshellwhitesucks "wear my non-existent faaaaceeee" Me "I'm only 38 years old!" thenightetc hahahaha eggshellwhitesucks like this film? A piece of trash? Me Hah! His laugh makes me feel unclean. And not in a fun way. eggshellwhitesucks ...Huh sounds familiar Starscreamapillar I have seen far too many rat nipples today. thenightetc A couple hundred rats are going to have a hard time doing that even if they ARE immortal. Me One rat nipple is too many. Starscreamapillar Drown that old man. thenightetc Wait. I thought they'd already been dosed with the elixer when they arrived? eggshellwhitesucks the elixir of false information thenightetc It's almost like they know it's fake. Me "Who wants to see an old man die?!" thenightetc Ha! eggshellwhitesucks It's almost like they know they're in a terrible movie. Starscreamapillar Watch him drown. thenightetc But, don't the Atlanteans give all their """"guests"""" the underwater breathing stuff? Starscreamapillar Wasn't he fussing about screwdrivers earlier? ThebesAce yup Me "Or something." Starscreamapillar Those were surface rats he tried to drown. thenightetc Well, that's not sinister eggshellwhitesucks oh my god thenightetc But why would surface rats be down there? eggshellwhitesucks They seriously just did that. Starscreamapillar They escaped. eggshellwhitesucks They're giving them the Titanic. Starscreamapillar Please do not force me to recall more of this nightmare than I have to. eggshellwhitesucks Can't wait for the third installment to come out thenightetc The boat was ripped in half They... fixed that? eggshellwhitesucks Nah. It's just that no one cares about continuity. Me Screwy. Starscreamapillar All fixed. They even got rid of the skeletons in the lower levels. Me Those child skeletons, always cluttering things up. thenightetc What skeletons, there weren't any skeletons! Everyone survived! Starscreamapillar Ah good. Still kidnapped, but now you're alone and kidnapped. Also, did the sailor mouse not marry some girl mouse on the mainland? Me He's got her brother, he'll be fine. eggshellwhitesucks Smile's a disappointment. Me Smile's got his fathers back home, but he was a neglectful son who never called, so no loss. thenightetc So... everyone came with them...? eggshellwhitesucks ...did she just laugh without opening her mouth thenightetc Ah. So they're kidnapped on an island all alone and isolated, but they get Skype, so it's okay Uh Starscreamapillar Oh good. The Treatment makes you insane if you escape. Me Well, that's not horrifying. ThebesAce barking rats, huh thenightetc That's... even creepier than my suggestion eggshellwhitesucks OH GOD Starscreamapillar NO. thenightetc Uh Me UNICRON. eggshellwhitesucks NOT THE HAIRLESS RAT thenightetc NOPE eggshellwhitesucks and this film just turned into a horror film thenightetc Wait, why is he unaffected? Starscreamapillar As it was always meant to be. eggshellwhitesucks oh god he's gonna start singing again Starscreamapillar Our enemies are in an insane prison forever? Celebrate! Me And at last, we're free. eggshellwhitesucks You know there's a reason those actors were never heard from again. This film ruined their careers. Starscreamapillar But are we really? The memories will never fade. thenightetc ...😔 eggshellwhitesucks Anyways, uh, I hope you guys have lovely.... seafaring...dreams.... about sinking ships and mad mice. Me Yes, that. ThebesAce clearly, we had to hear THIS song again Me It was a need. thenightetc Of course. eggshellwhitesucks It's my new ringtone. thenightetc There are ten minutes left?? Oh. Starscreamapillar Well, it has been a nightmare. Thank you for hosting this terrible time. thenightetc Why, though Me Always a pleasure. May the Allspark forgive me. thenightetc There, there. eggshellwhitesucks Have a good evening. Thank you for showing such a wonderful, feel good film. Starscreamapillar Until next time. I will never rest soundly again. Me Good night, everyone! ThebesAce good night, Knockout! thenightetc Good night! And thanks for hosting. 😃 It IS fun, despite the movie itself. Me You're very welcome!