#source: the completely made up adventures of dick turpin

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Kaz: I try not to compliment people til they’re dead, but I guess you were… adequate today

Jesper, tearing up: That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me

Kaz, threateningly: Never repeat it!

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Kaz: We don’t have time to sleep

Wylan: But Jesper needs 16 hours a day, or he can’t function!

Wylan: He’s like a basset hound

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Wylan, refusing to eat a meal Van Eck gave him: It’s probably poisoned

Van Eck: Ughhh, sweetheart, I try to poison you one time, and now it’s all you go on about

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Wylan, in a life/death scenario: Dad, can’t you help me out here?

Van Eck, impatiently: In a minute, son. I’m trying to maximise my profits

Wylan: … I might be dead in a minute!

Van Eck: 🤷‍♂️

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Jesper, after having been arrested, watching the guards walk away from the cell: Guys! You didn’t tell me how to order room service!

Jesper: … minibar?