#starting to think when the season is over we’ll be coming back to these moments and marveling at all the hidden foreshadowing that was

[ohmerricat]

hey insane doctor who people. remember the snowman scene in the church on ruby road? there was no baby in the pram 👀 instead of a baby it was “shopping” . tags i left on a gifset then realised fuck it, it deserves its own post

gift-wrapped baby that’s not a baby. saved by the doctor from imminent mortal danger but the snowman was hollow on the inside too…

[girlgenius1111]

throw it all away

part 1 of 2 if no one is noticing any changes, there must not be a problem. but then, someone does notice. and there is a problem. that just isn't a reality you really feel like accepting. [putellas!reader]... alexia realizes you're struggling. how does she help you with something she doesn't understand? tw: this is a fic about r struggling with an ED. proceed with caution.

—

“You’ve lost weight.” 

It wasn’t said with an impressed nod or smile. It wasn’t said like a benchmark you’d met. It wasn’t said like it was a good thing.

Somehow, you knew it wouldn’t be. 

Instead, the physio’s voice was gentle, concerned. He spoke to you like he knew how you got here, but he couldn’t. How could he know?

No one noticed. Not your teammates, not your friends. Not Spain’s physios. Not even your sister. 

And that’s what you wanted. 

“Okay…” You said, like you didn‘t understand why he’d  brought this up. 

“Not a little weight. Enough that I’m concerned.” His eyes were squinted a little, like he was trying to see right through you. Still, you maintained your composure, kept your face blank. 

“Well, I didn’t have much of an off season. It’s been pretty nonstop even since the end of the league season. I’m just in shape.” 

He shook his head, now looking almost pityingly at you. “That’s what the issue is? You’re sure?” 

You did what you’d been doing for months: you lied. 

“Yep. Can’t think of anything else it could be.” Your tone was light, even as the weight of the unspoken words settled heavily on your chest. 

“We have to be careful with these things, you understand. We’ll change up your meal plan, and see how you are in a week. You’ll be on light training anyway, like the rest of the girls coming back. If it’s a matter of being overworked, we’ll get you back healthy in no time.”

He didn’t say what would happen if things didn’t go back to normal; if this wasn’t just being overworked. He didn’t need to. He was giving you a chance to correct this yourself before he has to involve the doctors and the coaches. And your sister. He was giving you a chance to fix this before it became a much, much bigger deal. 

As you left the medical room, you wished more than anything that this was a chance you could take, but you knew that it wasn’t. 

—

You knew the physio had opened his mouth a week later when he came out during a water break to pull Alexia, Irene, and Pere aside. He spoke to them quietly for a few minutes, all three of them furtively looking over at you every so often. You knew what you were in for when you got home; probably a very angry Alexia. Angry that you were jeopardizing your career and your health, throwing all your hard work away. For Alexia, football was the most important thing in the world. Sometimes it felt like it was more important than you, and you knew that she wouldn’t understand this. She would see what you were going through as a weakness, something you needed to quickly resolve, and get back to the most important thing. 

It was just that you weren’t capable of handling Angry Alexia right now. Not when you already felt kind of faint from training on an empty stomach, horribly grumpy because you were fucking hungry, and honestly still in denial that anything was wrong. It would lead to a whole blow up fight you didn’t want to get into, and as such, you weren’t looking forward to going home. Alexia surprised you. 

She’d started off angry, moving to stomp over, grab you, and haul you home so she could yell, when Irene grabbed her wrist and encouraged her to just listen for a second. 

“This is going to ruin her season.” Alexia seethed. “Does she not realize that she’s hurting the team?”

Irene regarded her incredulously for a moment, having to remind herself that the other woman’s brain just worked differently than hers. “Ale, she’s hurting herself. Whatever she’s doing isn’t a selfish decision she’s making. She’s sick.” 

Your sister grew quiet, chewing on her lip as she thought through Irene’s words. 

“You can’t yell, Ale. You can’t be mad at her. She needs help, and she isn’t going to want to accept it. You have to be careful with this, gentle and patient and kind. Okay?” Irene said, staring hard at her co captain. 

“Yeah.” Alexia said quietly. “Pedro, do you know why… or how?” 

Pedro shook his head, worry clouding his face. “I asked her about it a week ago, and she pretended she had no idea what I was talking about. I told her she had a week to get back on track, but she didn’t. I don’t know how, or why. Those are both questions for your sister.” 

Alexia nodded, her gaze stuck on where you were stretching, just inside the gym tent. “Pere, can we go? I need to talk to her, and I know there needs to be a conversation with everyone, but she’ll just feel cornered if that’s where we start. I want to take her home to talk.” 

Pere agreed immediately, telling Alexia to take as much time as she needed, and reach out to the club for any help they could provide at all. Irene walked with the blonde in the direction of the tent, her arm slung across Alexia’s shoulders. 

“She isn’t going to want to talk to me.” Alexia murmured. “She hates talking about her feelings, especially with me.” 

Irene frowned. “You’re her sister. She trusts you more than she trusts anyone. Just stay calm and don’t get angry. I know when you worry you tend to get angry, but try not to let that happen. It won’t help.” 

Alexia nodded, having arrived at the entryway of the gym. Irene patted her on the back, telling her to call if she needed help, before she headed inside. She called you over, receiving a few odd looks from her teammates at the strange tone of her voice. 

Your sister could see how terrified you looked, even from all the way across the gym. Her heart clenched at the brave face you were trying to put on; it didn’t hide how scared you were.  

“Yeah?” You said, trying to act casual as you walked over to your sister, even though you felt kind of dizzy, and your head was pounding with a headache, not to mention the anxiety that was coursing through your veins. 

“We’re going home, we need to talk.” Her tone wasn’t clipped or sharp like you expected it to be. Her face wasn’t set with anger, her hands weren’t clenched into fists at her side. She looked strangely… calm. 

“Talk? About what?” You questioned, feeling defensive even if your sister wasn’t mad. 

“We’ll talk about it when we’re home. Let’s go.” With that, she led you out of the tent, back towards the main building. You stumbled slightly, the dizziness and nerves combining to make you a bit unsteady. 

Your sister steadied you, both her hands on her shoulders. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?” 

If you’d had any hopes that Alexia didn’t know what was going on, those disappeared. Her eyes flitted over you, her grip strong, as if she was worried you’d collapse or something. 

“Nothing. I’m fine.” Your voice was shaking, for a reason you weren’t quite sure of. 

Alexia softened, surprising you as she wrapped her arms around you tightly, pulling you into a hug. It was nice, comforting, and you sank into it, taking just a moment to allow yourself to be weak. 

It wasn’t comforting for your sister. Suddenly, all she could feel was the bones of your spine, more pronounced than they should be. It was a noticeable difference, and she knew that it likely felt more dramatic than it really was, considering the information the physio had given her, that this wasn’t that bad yet, that it was fixable. Still, your sister wanted to cry at how small you seemed against her. 

More than that, she wanted to cry that she hadn’t noticed this happening. 

—

You kept waiting for her to blow up. All the way to the locker room and to the car, all the way home, but she didn’t. She watched you carefully out of the corner of her eye, she carried your bag for you, and she insisted you drink an entire water bottle on the drive home. Alexia was worried, more than she was upset, and that was beginning to terrify you. 

She didn’t even really talk upon arriving home. She just set your bag down, looking around for Olga like the brunette would have all the answers to fix this. 

“Go shower, we can talk after, okay?” Alexia said over her shoulder, disappearing in the direction of the office Olga worked out of during the day. 

As you headed up the stairs, you wondered if the screen still slid out from your window as easily as it used to, when sneaking out was a bit of a habit. 

You wondered if your body could even take the jump down to the ground underneath your window. You wondered whether you even cared, if it meant that you’d get away from this conversation, escape the walls closing in around you.

—

Downstairs, Alexia was pacing a hole in the rug spread across the office floor. Olga was watching her march back and forth, waiting for her girlfriend to talk herself out, which she didn’t seem anywhere close to doing. 

“How could I miss this? Do I not pay enough attention? Is this my fault? Have I pushed her too hard? How long has this been going on? How did no one notice before now? What if-”

Olga stood, grabbing her girlfriend’s hands and putting her movements to a stop. “Amor, take a second. Relax. None of these questions need to be answered right now.” 

Alexia leaned almost imperceptibly into her girlfriend’s touch, desperate for anyone to tell her what to do here. 

“We need to talk to her. That’s where we start, and that is going to be hard, Ale. She probably doesn’t want to hear anything we have to say about this, and she might lash out, but you have to remember how much she must be hurting right now. You have to be patient, okay?” 

Alexia nodded her jaw tightening as her resolve strengthened. She’d be the most patient person in the world, if that’s what you needed. She’d do anything you needed her to, but the possibility that this wasn’t something that she could fix for you was terrifying her. She just wanted to help. 

—

When you came back downstairs after your shower, you knew you were in for an intervention. Ale and Olga were sitting on the couch next to each other, speaking in hushed tones. You approached them warily, sitting in the armchair across from the couch. 

Your sister took a deep breath, her eyes scanning over the piece of paper on the sofa next to her. It was a few notes that Pedro had given her, a few reminders she had for herself, and a few that Olga had added. 

Don’t get angry. She needs help, she doesn’t need your anger. 

Don’t push too hard, but don’t let her off with excuses.

 Be firm, but be kind. 

Don’t threaten to tell Mami, because she’ll just run. 

“I’m not mad.” Alexia started. Now that you were sure she wasn’t going to yell at you, you realized how much easier that would have been. You hated the concern on her face, the worry in her eyes. “You were looking at me earlier like I’d be mad at you, but I’m not mad.”

“Why would you be mad?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. Playing dumb always infuriated your sister, yet this time, she didn’t take the bait. 

“I talked to Pedro and Pere earlier. Pedro has some concerns, about you.” Your sister paused, looking at her girlfriend next to her, as if for reassurance. Olga nodded encouragingly, and Alexia straightened up. “I think you know what these concerns are, hermana.”

“I don’t.” You said quickly. “And I don’t appreciate you talking about me behind my back.” 

“You do.” Alexia said, still annoyingly calmly. 

“I really don’t, Alexia.” 

“Pequeña, please. I know that you aren’t okay. You don’t have to lie to me about that.” 

You wilted a little, eyes anywhere but on your sister, but she leaned forward, seeing an opportunity; a fracture in your walls. 

“I want you to be okay. I want you to get better, healthier.” Alexia said gently, her eyes flickering to the piece of paper in front of her every so often. It was a mix of her handwriting and Olga’s, though you couldn’t make out what it said. 

“I am better. I am healthier, Ale.” You argued weakly, finally looking at your sister. You half believed yourself, half knew that you were very far from healthy, the two conflicting sides waging war in your head. Would it be easier to admit defeat? To break down and let your sister fix you? You found that you didn’t really want to be fixed.

“Hermanita, this isn’t okay. You can’t keep going like this. It’s not safe.”

You shook your head defiantly, a single tear tracking down your cheek. “Alexia, I’m fine. You don’t need to worry.”

You didn’t think about the times you’ve cried yourself to sleep after having no choice but to eat a full dinner. You didn’t think about the way everything is just a touch more exhausting, now. You couldn’t think about that, you wouldn’t. You were fine. Why couldn’t Alexia see that? 

She just stared at you, blinking rapidly. Fighting back tears, you realized with a start. Her hand gripped Olga’s tightly, and you couldn’t fight the wave of guilt that hit you like a truck. She was worried, and you knew she should be. Somewhere deep inside, you knew. And that was the most terrifying part. 

“Cariño, I am so worried. You aren’t okay, I don’t understand how you can’t see that. You are an athlete, you know you need to fuel your body in the right way. You know this isn’t normal. Can’t you admit that?��

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, for the first time showing even a hint of emotion. It wasn’t anger, or sadness. It was fear. 

“I have it under control, Ale. I promise you, it’s under control.” Your voice wobbled, no confidence at all behind your words. Alexia shut her eyes tightly for a minute before blinking then open and looking at you in a much more intense way. 

“I don’t believe you.” 

You stood up, feeling a flare of anger surge through you. “I don’t care what you believe.” Moving to walk out the front door, though not sure where you were going, you froze at the sound of Alexia’s voice behind you. 

“You can leave, but we’re still going to have this conversation. I can wait, but the sooner we talk, the sooner you’ll be allowed back at training, and back on the team sheet.” 

You whirled around, hands balling into fists at your sides. “Since when am I off the team sheet?!” 

“Since today.” Alexia didn’t raise her voice to match yours, and she didn’t stand either. She remained sitting next to Olga, both of them looking at you so sympathetically, it made you want to sprint out of the house that instant. 

“How could you do that?” 

Alexia almost flinched at the genuinely betrayed tone of your voice, but she just shook her head. 

“I didn’t do anything, pequeña. The physios and Pere made this decision themselves, based off the information they have.” She replied, nodding towards the chair across from her again. “The only way you’re being allowed anywhere near training is if you talk.” 

“I don’t want to talk about this.” You snapped, throwing yourself down in the chair. 

“Well, we have to. I won’t watch you hurt yourself like this without saying anything.”

You flinched like she’d struck you. “I am not hurting myself, Alexia. I have it under control, it’s not dangerous, it’s not anything. It’s fine.” 

“You are hurting yourself. I don’t know how, but I know that you are. Whatever you are doing to make sure your body doesn’t gain weight is hurting you!” 

"You're being ridiculous, Alexia. Completely ridiculous." You spat back.

Nothing Alexia was saying was working. You remained just as defiant, just as frustrated. Nostrils flaring, hands clenched into fists, you refused to back down. 

Olga squeezed her girlfriend's hand, the blonde falling silent as she did so. 

“Pequeña, listen to me. We both love you so much. You are my sister, maybe not by blood, but in all the ways that count. And when you care about someone, it’s so hard to watch them go through something like this.”  

Olga’s voice was soft and gentle and somehow, the most threatening thing you’d heard. It was the way she looked at you, the way she spoke; like she knew what she was about to say would challenge you. 

“If this was anyone else doing what you’re doing, you’d have something to say. If this was a friend or a teammate, and you saw them doing this, you’d do something. Am I wrong?”

You found that you couldn’t lie, so you just shook your head. 

“Give yourself that same kindness. Give yourself that same love and care. You would get someone else help if they needed it, no matter what. Can you let us help you?”

Another tear ran down your cheek, your lip trembling as you fought to hold back your sobs. Only Olga’s hand in hers kept Alexia from leaping over the coffee table and pulling you into a hug. 

“I’m scared. I don’t want to.” You said finally. Your eyes fixed on Olga, refusing to look over at your sister and see the disappointment you knew was simmering. 

“But you need to. And you know you need to.” Olga said carefully. She watched as an array of emotions flashed across your face, until you finally landed on… resigned. 

“I… I don’t know where to start.” 

“That’s okay!” Alexia jumped in. “You don’t need to know. We can take it one step at a time. We’ll get through this, hermanita, I promise.” 

The way Alexia was talking made your stomach twist. There was no ‘we’ here. Alexia didn’t close her eyes when she got dressed in the morning, didn’t turn her back to the mirror before she showered. She didn’t have to come up with excuses to go to the bathroom after a big meal, she didn’t know exactly how to move her food around her plate to look like she’d eaten more than she had. Alexia loved you, and you had no doubt that this was hurting her, but there was no comparison to what you’d been putting yourself through. Alexia couldn’t fix this for you, couldn’t even really fix it with you. It was something you had to entirely be committed to, recovery, something that would take strength from the deepest parts of you. Alexia couldn’t promise that you’d get through it. It wasn’t up to her.

You didn’t say any of that to your sister. What good would that have done? Instead, you dropped your head into your hands, and tried to breathe. You still couldn’t quite believe this was happening, and a part of you wished you’d wake up and it would all be some horrible dream, and no one would actually know. Another part of you, though, felt like sobbing in relief that someone had finally noticed. 

Unbeknownst to you, Alexia and Olga were having a silent conversation. Alexia wanted to drag you into the kitchen and make you eat lunch, since she was absolutely sure that you hadn’t had breakfast. She wanted to talk, and talk some more, and find you a therapist, and call her Mami and tell her what was going on. She wanted to do every little thing she could think of, because she was sure if she tried hard enough, she could control this enough for you to be okay.

Olga knew better. She looked at you and could tell that you were barely restraining yourself from curling up into a ball and crying. She knew trying to make you eat a full meal in the way Alexia intended to right now would push you too hard. She knew that you needed time and space to process and breathe. The brunette could see how easily you’d be overwhelmed here, and it was this knowledge that had her firmly telling Alexia what she was to do. 

“Go upstairs and shower. I’ve got her.” She whispered, kissing Alexia’s cheek softly. 

Her girlfriend looked at her in confusion, both of them exchanging a few glances before Alexia gave in. 

“Please try to get her to eat something.” The blonde whispered back, standing and beginning to head upstairs. She paused at your chair, opening her mouth to say something before thinking better of it. Instead, she just kissed the crown of your head and headed upstairs. 

Only once Olga heard the shower turn on upstairs did she finally move, walking around the coffee table and crouching in front of you. 

“Nena?” She called softly. 

You looked up apprehensively. 

“What do you need right now? You tell me, and that’s what we’ll do.” 

Control. Olga was giving you control, but you didn’t know what to do with it. You felt overwhelmingly lost, not even sure if you could put one foot in front of the other without someone telling you how to. 

“I… don’t know.” You replied, shrugging your shoulders. 

“That’s okay.” Olga assured you. “We don’t have to talk any more today, but I’d like you to try to eat something. It doesn’t have to be big, or a whole meal, but something. Is there anything you’d like?” 

No, there wasn’t, you wanted to snap. That was part of the problem. Instead of snapping, though, you found yourself thinking. “Protein shake?” You requested shakily. 

Olga nodded, smiling proudly at you. “Protein shake and a piece of toast, I think.” 

You found yourself agreeing, somehow, rising from your chair and following Olga into the kitchen. You tried to think of what would be worse; eating or talking. Both seemed like pretty abysmal choices, but Olga set your small meal down in front of you, and you knew there wasn’t really a choice. As quickly as it had been handed over to you, you felt the control slipping out of your grasp. The shower turned off upstairs, and you reached for the glass, bracing yourself for everything you were about to feel, and everything Alexia was probably about to say.

—

back in my two parter era. let me know what you all think :)

[icarryitin]

Trade Deal

spencer reid/gn!reader

i started this bc i was ill and feeling sorry for myself and it turned into a very not to me not if it’s you kind of vibe, mostly bc i frankensteined a couple of my favourite translations of That Scene so they could have their own version🥰🥰

series masterlist

word count: 1.5k // warnings: reader has a cold and all the grossness that comes with it, spencer is so Cute™️ it causes me physical pain

summary: In which Spencer Reid, known germaphobe, pretends he doesn’t know exactly how many pathogens have made their home in your sinuses.

It starts with a scratchy throat on a Tuesday morning.

You don’t think much of it, blame it on seasonal allergies, knock back a multivitamin - you’re not about to be bested by a cough of all things. That is, until it gets to Friday afternoon. You’re trying, you really are. Your immune system has other plans.

“You stay right there, Patient Zero.”

Rossi’s comment would be funny if you didn’t think that laughing might trigger a coughing fit that could very well be the end of you, right there in the doorway of Hotch’s office. That’d be one hell of an epitaph - too stubborn to take a sick day, choked to death in boss’s office. Hotch, at least, already seems to know why you’re hovering.

“I’m-“

“Going home, I hope.” He interrupts you with all the fondness of a concerned father. You don’t have the energy to argue, or to hold up an unaffected front. The men standing by the window soften a little as they watch you visibly deflate. Dave promises to send you his Nonna’s minestrone recipe, there’s nothing it can’t cure; right now, though, you’re only thinking about your bed.

The well wishes follow you through the bullpen, old wives tales and family cures that have never failed. JJ tells you to sweeten your tea with honey, Derek swears that a hot water bottle on your back will work magic. Even Emily pipes up from behind her germ shield, the folder held across her face so you can only see her eyes, and tells you to take a hot shower first thing in the morning - the steam will clear you out for the day. There’s a chorus of agreement, or disagreement you’re not sure. It’s a struggle to hear much over the cotton wool in your ears.

“We’ll see, with any luck I’ll die in my sleep. Love you!” You sniffle as you back out of the office, feeling all kinds of sorry for yourself, and determined to make it as far as you can without touching anything. Lest you actually start the next plague.

Spencer watches you go, shuffling backwards out of the office and turning towards the elevators. He’d elected not to add his own suggestions to the plethora of options supplied by the rest of the team. Unable to focus on much beyond just how tired you look. You’ve been fighting this thing all week, he’d passed over his own supply of hand sanitiser only that morning when you ran out. Ultimately, you put up a good fight, but there’s no cure for a virus. It just has to run its course. Just like his own feelings.

Okay, maybe he shouldn’t be comparing a virus to whatever it is he feels for you. Has felt, will feel - if there’s an end to this tunnel, he can’t see it yet.

“What about you, Spence?”

JJ’s voice pulls him from his thoughts before he can start spiralling down that particular hole. It takes him a moment to recall what they’d been chattering about before your long overdue exit - drinks, right. Yeah, that’s not happening.

“I’m busy, actually.” He shrugs, content to miss out on one night in favour of the plan currently coming to fruition in his mind. They won’t miss him too much.

“Busy? You weren’t busy when we talked about it last week.” Emily makes no effort to conceal her surprise. To be fair to them, it’s not like him to blow them off. There’s just something that’s come up, something decidedly you shaped, that’s far more important.

“Yeah, I forgot. Sorry.”

Spencer doesn’t miss the look that JJ and Emily share, he doesn’t miss the eyebrow that Derek raises in his direction. He simply chooses to ignore them.

At least the walk to your apartment is short, there’s still heat leeching from the plastic bag around Spencer’s wrist as he fumbles with his keys. You’d given him a bright pink key cap, so he’d know which one was yours, as if he wouldn’t know anyway. Eidetic or not, that’s one he would have committed to memory. The excuse had been because he was helping you out whilst you were down an arm, takedown gone wrong, you’d dislocated your shoulder. And then you’d insisted he keep it, because someone should have your spare key, and he’s the least likely of the lot of you to lose it.

He thinks you might be asleep at first, open plan living area lit only by a salt lamp and a set of fairy lights draped over your kitchen window, it’s cosy. And then you appear in the bedroom doorway, wrapped in a jewel toned blanket. The low light is forgiving, but Spencer would be able to spot the bags under your eyes from a mile away. Without his glasses.

“I brought noodles.” He says as he turns back to set the steaming bag on your kitchen counter.

“I’m so gross right now.” As if to demonstrate your point, another cough racks your body. You just about manage to catch it under the swathes of blanket clutched in your fingers, but at least he can’t claim you’re not truly disgusting in this moment.

“I don’t mind.”

You’re so set on denying him entry that you don’t even really register what he said - Spencer Reid doesn’t mind that you’re ill. He doesn’t mind. A younger, healthier version of you would swoon. You might anyway, although that’s probably the vertigo talking.

“You’ll get sick.” Your rebuttal is weak, resolve crumbling. Warm noodles do sound pretty good right now.

“Will you let me help you, please?” It’s the firmest he’s ever been with you. No room for argument, doctor’s orders. So you have to relent. Not that you have much of a choice, he’s already pottering about in your kitchen in search of bowls. As if he doesn’t remember where they are.

“Did you get me a number three?” Your voice is brighter than he’s heard it all week.

“With extra toppings, of course.”

And those extra toppings go down a treat, of course they do.

Spencer watches you carefully as you eat - usually he’d be a little more subtle about it, but there’s not a lot that could pull your attention away from the bowl in your hands. You’re cross legged on the couch, blanket bunched around your middle, happy as a clam. Something his mother would say. He wonders what else she might say, what she might think about the abandonment of his germaphobia. Convenient, probably. Diana would say it with a raised eyebrow and a sly smile, the one that’s just for him. She has always liked you.

He promises he’ll be back tomorrow, once dishes are washed and leftovers are tucked neatly in your fridge, to make sure you get that hot shower Emily mentioned. The steam will definitely help, he’s read about it. Arguing with him would be pointless. You don’t have the energy, he’d only show up anyway, and it’s kind of nice to feel looked after. Spencer’s never failed to make you feel like that. You’re far too delirious to start thinking about that, not while he’s still standing in front of you at least. So you let him tuck you into bed, let him leave a glass of water on the table, let him dote. Pretending is a comfort when you feel as awful as you do. You’re already drifting off before he’s even ready to leave, content enough in your bed with the sound of him in the other room. Just, tinkering.

The sound of your front door opening rouses you the next morning, just about. Just enough to raise your head from your pillow and witness the sorry sight in your bedroom doorway.

Spencer’s trying - key word, trying - to suppress his sniffles, but the red rimmed eyes and tissue clutched in his fist give him away. It’s impossible to keep the sad little smile off of your face.

“Oh no.” You reach out a tired arm to pat the space beside you. There’s enough room for the two of you in amongst the blankets, and Spencer’s so far gone that he doesn’t even argue. His shoes and bag find a home at the foot of your bed as he lets himself collapse into the nest you’ve built. Tension leeches out of his body the moment he hits the mattress.

You have to lean across him to get your phone, right arm outstretched over his back - you can feel the heat rising off of him through his sweater and yours. Fever, that’s day two. Which means he spent yesterday evening taking care of you whilst he began to feel worse and worse. Softie.

“Egg or no egg?”

There’s an affirmative grunt from where his face is buried in your blankets. Egg it is, then. You dial the number mostly from memory, elbow still resting on his shoulder blade when you put the phone to your ear. You feel a little better than you did, but dragging yourself to the front door is still probably all you’ll be capable of today. At least you won’t be suffering alone. The line rings for a moment, then clicks, and a grainy hello sounds from the other side.

“Hi, can I place a breakfast order for delivery, please?”

i’m stuck on which chapter to work on next, do we want angst or yearning or fun flirty activities????🧡

[brodygold]

From One Football to Another

Jake sat on the empty football field, staring out at the sunset as the final rays of light stretched across the turf. The season had ended, and he was feeling a void in his chest that he couldn’t quite shake. Football had always been his whole world, but now it was over, and he wasn’t sure what came next. His teammates had all scattered, leaving him alone in the quiet stadium, unsure of his next move. His girlfriend Kelsey had also just broken up with him, leaving him feeling even more lost.

“Hey,” a voice called from behind him.

Jake turned to see Captain Richard, the leader of the Golden Army, walking over. Dressed in the unmistakable gold jersey, Richard seemed to exude a calm confidence. The Golden Army was known for being more than just a soccer team—they were like a family. Jake had heard stories about how close-knit they were, but it was still strange seeing Richard out here on the football field.

“Mind if I join you?” Richard asked, motioning to the empty spot next to Jake.

“Sure,” Jake replied, nodding.

Richard sat down beside him, not saying much at first, just gazing out at the horizon. There was a natural ease to him that Jake couldn’t help but admire. After a moment, Richard spoke.

“I heard you’re feeling a little lost now that the season’s over,” he said, his voice gentle, understanding.

Jake let out a long breath. “Yeah. I don’t know what to do next. Football’s been my life for as long as I can remember, and now it’s just... gone. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do.”

Richard smiled softly, looking at him. “That’s a tough feeling. But just because one thing ends doesn’t mean you’re out of options. There’s always a new path to take. You ever think about joining the Golden Army?”

Jake blinked in surprise. He hadn’t expected that. “Me? I don’t know anything about soccer, man.”

Richard chuckled. “It’s not really about the sport. It’s about being part of something bigger than yourself. The Golden Army is more than just a team—it’s a brotherhood. And we’re always looking for new people who can bring heart and passion. You’ve got those in spades.”

Jake shook his head, unsure. “But why me? I’m a football player, not a soccer guy.”

Richard looked at him with a steady gaze. “Because I see someone who’s searching for something, someone with the drive to belong. You’d fit right in with us. And once you put on that gold jersey, trust me, things will change.”

There was something about Richard’s voice that made Jake pause. He’d been feeling so lost, but the idea of starting something new—something where he could be part of a family again—started to feel more appealing. The warmth of Richard’s words stirred something unfamiliar in Jake, but he pushed the thought aside.

“Alright,” Jake said finally. “What’s the next step?”

Richard smiled, standing up. “Come with me. We’ll get you suited up.”

***

In the Golden Army locker room, Jake stood in front of a mirror, watching as Richard handed him a gleaming gold jersey. His name had already been stitched into the back, but not as "Jake."

Richard grinned. “From now on, you’re Blaze. A name that reflects the fire you bring to the team.”

Jake hesitated for a moment, looking at the jersey. He’d always been Jake, always been the straight-laced, straight-shooting football player. But as he slipped the gold jersey over his head, something shifted. The fabric felt like more than just a uniform—it felt like a second skin, a new identity wrapping around him.

When he looked up, he found Richard’s eyes on him, warm and intense. For the first time, Jake felt something he hadn’t expected—a sudden, powerful attraction to the man standing before him. The room seemed to shrink, and all that existed was the closeness between them. He thought he was straight, but any confusion quickly melted away. Jake knew what he needed to do.

Richard took a step closer, and before Jake could stop himself, he closed the distance, capturing Richard’s lips in a kiss. It was gentle at first, hesitant, but then it deepened, full of unspoken desire.

As Jake continued kissing Richard, he realized it felt right. Before the very idea might have repulsed him, but now he couldn’t imagine doing anything else. And for the moment, he wouldn’t.

When they finally pulled away, Richard smiled, his hand resting on Jake’s chest, over the emblem of the Golden Army. “Welcome to the team, Blaze.”

Blaze felt a surge of something he hadn’t anticipated, something that made his heart race and his chest feel light. For the first time in a long while, he wasn’t just part of a team—he was part of something bigger. And, standing there with Richard, he felt like he was finally home. Football season may be over, but he had a new football to play with a new partner.

[probably-writing-x]

Blushing Boy

Drew Starkey x Reader

Summary: There were few things that made Drew Starkey lose his confidence, in fact, perhaps only one could truly ever do it; you. He didn’t know how, or why, but you just seemed to have that goddamn effect on him.

Warnings: Nothing besties, just fluffy as heck

Author’s Note: Thank you so so much for the love on my other post, I just had to post this one too !! Please please send in any requests you have my angels <3

Not my gif

You were just about nearing the end of press for Outer Banks Season 3, and all bases had been covered - you’d done interviews to see how well you knew your cast mates, ones looking at scenes from the show, and, of course, the puppy interview. Today was your last day, though all of you were split up in different places, on different projects, and so the last day of interviews would be done over zoom. This was your first experience working on the show, having come in to play Rafe’s love interest as the start of the season. Thankfully, the fans had fallen in love with you, and especially with your storyline with Drew. So much so, in fact, that they’d started to ship you two as actors as well, adoring every moment that they saw you spend together. The two of you were just friends, but you can’t say you didn’t find it amusing whenever theories were made. And, being honest, some of the edits did make you two look cute.

That was your side of things, anyway. Drew had fallen for you at the same rate that Rafe had fallen for your character. He wanted to see you every morning you started work, waiting to catch sight of you on set. He wanted to film all of his scenes with you, watching in awe whenever you acted. He was mesmerised whenever he saw you at events, amazed by you from the red carpets to the earliest of mornings. Drew felt like a schoolboy around you, stumbling over his words, blushing at prolonged eye contact, ears pricking up at the sound of your name. And it only got worse the more he saw of you.

“Okay, thank you guys all for joining me today,” The interviewer begins, smiling widely into the screen, “We’ve got Madelyn, Chase, Madison, Rudy, Jonathon, Carlacia, Drew and (Y/N), the cast of season three of Outer Banks, now streaming on Netflix. How are you guys doing?”

“I’m good,” Madelyn smiles.

“I’m tired, I flew back from Paris today and I’m so jetlagged,” Madison laughs.

“Okay, we’ll start off with a question for Chase, how has it been with the new additions to the cast this season - with Carlacia and (Y/N). How does that fit in with the dynamic of you guys working together?”

Chase leans closer to his microphone and speaks, “You know I think we got really lucky again to work with another great group of people, we all get on so well and these two just fit in perfectly with that, and it makes it so easy to go to work when you’re with such a good bunch.”

“Amazing, and (Y/N), what was your experience like being on set?”

You shift in your seat, glancing at all of the faces on screen, “Like Chase said, it was just ideal getting to work with everyone, it’s like being on one long holiday all working together, you’re out in the sun everyday, you’re on the water, you’re doing stunts, it was just such a great experience. And I was so lucky to get to share the screen with Drew, he makes it so easy to come into work everyday and, I mean, it’s not exactly hard to pretend to fall in love with him.”

You glance at him on the screen and the way his eyes seem so transfixed as you speak, like he holds onto every syllable one at a time. He’s wearing a purple t-shirt that brings out his eyes and his hair is messy in that sort of perfect way it always was.

“And Drew, what was it like to be working with (Y/N) so closely?”

“Yeah, I mean,” He coughs over his words, “It was great, (Y/N) is just perfect to work with, I couldn’t have asked for anyone better. She’s so talented, and kind and supportive as an actress and she just made me want to get up every day and come into work.”

You’re sure your cheeks heat with the vulnerability of what he has said. His are bright red too, and you’re relieved for a moment to share the same feeling even across the screen.

A few more questions are asked, Rudy explains about how many injuries he managed to pick up on set and Jonathon tells an embarrassing story about you and Madelyn from the wrap party. And then attention falls back to you and Drew.

“So, whilst I’ve got you guys here, I have to ask Drew and (Y/N) about the rumours that have been going around about you two, can you tell me anything the fans will want to hear?”

You laugh, slightly allowing yourself a bit more time before you figure out what to say, “You know, these things are inevitable when you play a couple on a show. But I think we take it as a compliment if anything, at least it was convincing enough for people to believe us, you know? Right Drew?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Drew chuckles dryly, “I’m just glad they know that we don’t hate each other.”

“Are you blushing Starkey?!” Rudy exclaims, coming closer to the screen.

Drew laughs and looks away, biting the tip of his tongue between his teeth, “Shut it Pankow.”

Everyone laughs but it’s as if you can feel all eyes on the two of you, and in that moment, all you want it for him to be there with you to share the attention. For him to be close enough that your hand could brush his, your eyes could focus solely on Drew’s, your laugh in rhythm with his. And, in that moment, perhaps for the first time, you realise that maybe those edits had realised something before you had.

“Okay, well it’s been great speaking to you guys, thank you so much for joining me,” The interviewer finishes up, closing off before telling you that you’re all done and you can log off from the call.

You shut your laptop and pull out your phone to see notifications already bursting through. They’re all from the groupchat you had with the other girls.

Oh my god did you see his face?

Are you kidding me rn??? That boy is in love with you

I’ll never forgive you if you don’t date Starkey fr

You laugh, fingers hovering over the buttons as you try to figure out a response. You wanted to tell them that they were being stupid, that there was no reason for them to think like that. But you can’t bring yourself to lie to them.

You swipe away from that chat, scrolling the short way down to where Drew’s chat with you was. The last thing he’d sent you was a fan made video of the two of you, a video from set where he had you on his shoulders in the pool and both of you fell under.

When you go to text him, he’s already typing.

And this time, you’re the one that’s blushing.

[iheartyouyou]

SWEETHEART | Jeremiah Fisher

Summary: After your parents file for a divorce, you’re forced to move in with your mom’s friend until the divorce is finalized. You wished you could stay with your dad and your friends, but when you meet Jeremiah Fisher, that changes. And now you’re wanting to stay in the Cousins. Too bad things don’t last forever.

Word Count:

Part: 6

previous part series masterlist next part

Authors Note: I’m like actually so sorry for not updating. I’ve just been really unmotivated but since season 2 is out I’ve gotten more motivation and energy to continue the series! Not proofread (like always) but please let me know if you want to be on the taglist or if I missed you! (it wouldn’t let me tag some ppl for some odd reason.)

“Y/N, wake up!” You hear someone whisper.

You mumble something you don’t even remember, shoving your face deeper into a pillow. You think whoever was trying to wake you left, and so just as you were about to fall back asleep a pillow hit your back.

You look up to see Jeremiah with a pillow in his hand… and he was shirtless. You lazily stared at his abs before he smacked your face with pillow.

Fuck, did he notice?

“C’mon! It’s Belly’s birthday, we gotta go get up before her.” He says.

“Wha—“ You start, cut off with another pillow to face. You reach your arm out to snatch the pillow away, but he pulls it out of your reach.

“What time is it?” You ask, rubbing your eyes.

“8:00”

“What the hell—“

“It’s Belly’s birthday, we gotta decorate the kitchen before she wakes up.” He explains, throwing the pillow back onto your bed.

It was her birthday? Shoot, why didn’t anybody tell you? You would’ve gotten her a gift, you know you just met her and all but still.

“I’ll be down in a bit.” You mumble, shoving your face back into your pillow.

Maybe you could get her a gift later? What does she even like?

“Okay, make sure to brush your teeth… I can smell your breath all the way from over here.” He exaggerates, jokingly grimacing as he plugs his nose.

“Shut up!”

And before you knew it, you were back asleep. You were exhausted from the night before. After Belly joined in on your guys’ movie marathon, she shortly fell asleep and whenever you would close your eyes for longer than 5 seconds, Jeremiah would be the one to poke you, waking you up. It wasn’t until after the movies were over, Jeremiah woke Belly up and the two didn’t even have a chance to leave before you were passed out.

You rubbed your eyes hastily, jumping out of bed after you heard the multiple “heys” coming from downstairs.

Grabbing the first shirt and shorts you saw, you sped walk downstairs, following the voices.

“….Conrad, uh, do you wanna give Belly your present?” You hear Susannah ask.

It’s quiet for a few moments, before Conrad responds, “Sorry… I forgot.”

Nobody noticed you yet as you watch the side of Belly’s face fall, a small frown on her lips.

An awkward pause of silence washes over before Belly quickly recovers, “Oh. That’s cool— I wasn’t really expecting anything anyways.”

Another awkward pause happens until your mom spots you. “Ah, there’s Y/N!”

You watch as all eyes fall on you, your mom getting up from her spot on the couch and making her way to you. She pulls out a small box from her front pocket, giving it to you. She mouths the words; “We’ll talk later”

You give her a tight lipped smile, before she makes her way back to her spot. You follow quickly, giving the box to Belly as you say “Happy Birthday.”

Belly sends you an appreciative smile, “Aw, Y/N. You really didn’t have to get me anything.”

“Pfttt, of course I did.” You say, watching as she opened the box. It was a pair of earrings along with a necklace. Her smile widens, “Thank you!”

Conrad makes an excuse, before exiting the room as Belly smiles once falls again.

“Hey, why don’t we practice driving before we have to go pick up Taylor from the bus station?” You hear Jeremiah say.

Who the hell is Taylor?

-

“I can’t believe you would sleep in like that!” Your mom lectures you after pretty much everybody left the house. Jeremiah invited you to go witness “Belly’s terrible driving skills” but you mom quickly shot him down.

“I didn’t know—“ You start, uncomfortably sitting at the edge of her bed.

“Really? Because didn’t Jeremiah wake you up?”

“Well, yeah—“

“Jesus, Y/N. Why are you acting like this? I didn’t raise you—

“Oh, I don’t know! Maybe because you’re forcing me to stay here when I can stay with Dad!” You interrupt.

Before your mom could even get a chance to go off at you, a knock on the door stops her. She exhales before opening the door.

Susannah stands there with a smile on her face, “Hey, I was wondering if I can take Y/N out for shopping? I need to get some stuff for tonights dinner, It would be a great time to get to know her better.”

Your mom stays quiet for a moment before nodding, “Yeah, I’m sure it’ll be fun.”

You follow Susannah outside to her car, silent as you sat in the front seat. You put your seatbelt on before you realize that Susannah wasn’t making any move to put hers on.

“Y/N, look, I know how it must feel to be staying at some random strangers house. But, I’ve known your mom for a while. And she has her reasons, okay?” She tries to explain, staring at you with a look of empathy on her face.

You bite your tongue, trying to stop yourself from saying anything rude. You appreciated Susannah letting you stay here, she was nice, had amazing sons, well one of them at least, and she was an overall sweet person. It was just… you missed home. You missed your friends, you missed your dad, and it feels weird being here. You feel out of place, like an intruder. Everybody knows everybody but you.

“I just wanna go home.” You mumble, leaning your head against the car door.

She stays silent for a moment. “… Okay, how bout we make a deal?”

This perks your interest as you lift your head to look at her.

“If you still wanna go home by the end of this week, I’ll talk to your mom and see about flying you home.”

Your eyes widen, “Wait really? You’d do that?”

“Yes, but only if your mom is on board. Just try to stay on your mom’s good side until then?” She suggests, sending you a wink causing you to laugh.

“Okay, okay, deal.” You say, trying your hardest not to smile from ear to ear.

She starts the car, “I actually need stuff for Belly’s birthday dinner tonight but we can stop for some pies and eat them in the car. Just don’t tell anybody.”

-

By the time you’re back at the house, you notice Jeremiah’s red jeep back in the driveway. You felt fat and full after splitting a pecan pie with Susannah and just wanted to sleep it off.

You helped get the groceries out of the car, setting them inside on the counter. Your mom was nowhere to be found, thank god so you didn’t have to continue the lecture from earlier… at least for now.

As you were about to grab the last bag, you spot Conrad and his girlfriend, whatever her name is, walking to the backyard.

Oh god were they about to make out in the pool or what? Why’d he even bring her? It’s Belly’s birthday and he just brought his girlfriend over like they weren’t arguing a few days ago? Pathetic.

“Do you need help with putting these away?” You offer Susannah once your back inside, she shoos you away, claiming you should go hang out with the rest of the kids.

You shoot her a appreciative smile, your arms sore from carrying all those bags as you went from store to store.

Opening the sliding door, the first people you notice are Conrad and his girlfriend sitting on the edge, and the next thing is a net with a volleyball flying over it.

“Hey, Y/N! You’re back!” You hear Belly shout, Conrad and his girlfriend both turn to look at you but you ignore them as you make your way closer to the pool.

“Hey.” You say. You finally notice the new face next to her, a dirty blonde in a teal bikini. And you definitely don't miss the dirty look she sends you.

She waits a few moments, hoping her friend in the bikini would introduce herself but she doesn’t make any effort, still looking at you like you were gum on the bottom of her shoe.

Belly nervously laughs, “Y/N, this is my best friend Taylor. Taylor, this is Y/N. You know the one I was telling you about on the phone?”

“Oh yeah.” Taylor says, forcing a smile your way.

What the hell was her problem?

“Join us! Steven can sit out—“ Jeremiah starts, throwing the ball up in the air but catching it.

“No, no, I never agreed to that!” Steven argues, Jeremiah spins around and guessing by the look on his face or something he said that you couldn’t hear Steven groans before giving in.

“Actually we were about to go to the beach, right Belly?” Taylor speaks.

“Uh, yeah.. Y/N do you want to come?” Belly asks, looking away from her friend to look at you.

Telling by the annoyed look on Taylors face and the way she’s been looking at you, you can tell she doesn’t want you there. Or anywhere around her for that matter.

“No thanks, I’m pretty tired from shopping.” You tried to joke, chuckling to yourself.

“How could you be tired if you slept in this morning?” Taylor quips, shooting you a glare. Belly turns around to shoot her one, causing Taylor to shrug.

“Haha, yeah…” You mumble, scratching your arm. Oh god, the end of the week couldn’t come any faster.

Belly gives you an empathic look, or you think she did, you were too busy staring at your feet.

You didn’t want to go back inside because you didn’t want to seem like coward but you also didn’t want to stay if you weren’t wanted.

Jeremiah was quick to notice your awkwardness, telling you that you could dip your legs into the water on his side and so that’s what you did. Sitting on the edge of the pool, dangling your legs in the water and most important of all, sitting far far away from Taylor.

Instead of Belly and Taylor going to the beach like Taylor said they would, they play a few more rounds of volleyball until Taylor hit Conrad’s girlfriend in the face causing her and Conrad to go inside.

And soon Steven left because his girlfriend called him, causing him to almost drop his phone in the water, and because it was just Jeremiah vs. Belly and Taylor they finally decided to go to the beach.

“Hey, y’know Belly doesn’t care you slept in right?” Jeremiah says, splashing water at you. He swims closer to you, pulling himself out of the pool to sit on the edge next to you.

You roll your eyes, “Her friend does.”

“Taylor? Yeah, she’s a little cray cray.” He says, motioning it with his finger.

You laugh, shaking your head. “How long is she staying?”

“Just a few days, then we’ll be Taylor free for the rest of summer.”

The rest of summer.

“You should get in.” He says, elbowing your side.

“I don’t have a bathing suit.”

He stays silent for a moment, “So?” He pushes you into the water, your body submerging into the cold water as you shoot up coughing.

You can hear him laughing, while you’re basically choking on the chlorine filled water. “You jerk! I didn’t want to get my clothes wet!”

“You can still take them off.” He suggests, watching as you slicked your hair back.

You shoot him a playful glare, “In your dreams.”

“Every dream since I’ve met you.”

You splash him with water, “You’re stupid.”

He stares at you for a moment before tackling you under water, pulling you back up with his arm around your waist. “What’d you say?”

You wipe your eyes, trying to shove him off you but no budge. Your guys’ faces were even closer, your breath hitched. What was gonna happen?

He made eye contact with you a few times, and the times he wasn’t doing that he was staring at your lips. He started leaning in, closer and closer to the point where your noses were almost touching.

You felt like you couldn’t even breathe.

Did you even want this?

And just as he was about to move closer you shoved him away, taking him by surprise.

He backs away quickly, eyes widening.

“S-sorry.. I just… I just don’t really know you.” You say, scratching the back of your neck.

“No, yeah, yeah I shouldn’t have done that. You don’t have to apologize.” He says, eyes still as round as saucers.

“Uhrm… yeah…” You mumble, crossing your arms around yourself as you suddenly felt cold even though you were used to the water.

What a way to kill a mood. Why’d you even do that, damnit.

He nods, placing his lips into a tight line. “I’m gonna…” He closes his mouth, pointing to the house while backing up.

“Okay.” You say, nodding.

You watch him turn around, pull himself out of the water and grab a towel before he quickly goes inside

Leaving you in the pool alone as you stared at the spot he was just at.

Taglist: @mindflay3r @lexi-2004 @buckys2thicc @agoodmansaid @jeremiahfisherslover @yourfavoritefangirl @leslienjazzy @natsgaygf @justkayleighhere @puptails @simp4jackharlow @yobabygirlally @whenmypartysover @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @medusaslilsister @maexxc @siriuslysmoking @nowimyurdaisy @totallynotkaibiased @eevee0722 @theyallhaveluv4lyricb @wh0reforstefansalvatore @pariahsparadise

[jaegeraether]

Sunsets and footballers (Part 82)

Lucy Bronze x Reader (65) / Alexia Putellas x Character (38) & Jordan Nobbs x Leah Williamson (19)

Masterlist (other parts here)

((4k))

Due to popular demand, I'm going to post a chapter bi-weekly, every Thursday and Sunday night until we hit Part 100!

JORDAN POV

“Ridley is back?!”

YFN nodded with her happy smile as she ate.

“Oh, come on chick, you have to give us more than that!”

Lucy staring like a lovesick puppy at YFN laughing did so did not go unnoticed by her. Or Leah it seemed, as she felt her leg gently moving under the table to touch her own.

“She came back yesterday. She was in the hospital yesterday evening with me getting my surgery to check in on me… and because she was getting work done too..”

Leah scoffed.

“Oh of course she did. Let me guess – she lifted a bus off of a group of school kids?”

“I know better than to ask by now,” she shrugged.

“Is she back for you or…?” Leah asked hesitantly. “Because Alexia left, didn’t she?”

YFN nodded. “Ale left yesterday afternoon but Ridley caught her on the plane. She’s with her right now, actually. Taking her away for some time together…”

“I’m surprised Alexia went, to be fair.”

“Riddles has a reason for everything she does. I’m sure Ale wouldn’t have accepted her back easily so I guarantee Riddles has been opening up to her at last.”

“She wasn’t gone for long,” Lucy noted aloud. “Thank god. I thought we’d never see her again.” She looked like she knew about the messages from Ridley – but they hadn’t quite been able to discuss the finer details of what was actually happening.

“Me too…” YFN replied with a shared expression. It made Jordan wonder how bad the leaving had been.

“Are they coming to the party on Friday?”

Lucy shot Jordan a look and her stomach dropped at the slip-up.

“The party?” YFN asked.

“The friends and family thing after the game,” Leah said, jumping in the save the day - sounding nonchalant about it all. “It’s a whole Lioness thing – it took a while to convince my folks to be fair..”

Jordan reached out under the table to give Leah’s thigh a thankful squeeze, though when she went to take her hand away, it was caught. She took a deep breath.

“Oh… I’m not sure. I don’t think they are?” Luckily – she didn’t seem to realise that the event on her birthday was in fact, for her birthday. Jordan hid a grin at how humble she was, and honestly, she was just so excited to share her birthday with her at the party. She’d not nearly spent enough time with her lately. “Friends and family? Christ, that’s a lot of people, no?”

“We won’t really get another chance until the season is over, little one.” Lucy explained. “Besides – we’ll need it after the game. We’re all so focussed on that at the moment. We need to win, and by as much as possible.”

Lucy seemed to know just how to shift her attention from thinking about the party to worrying out Lucy’s competitiveness. “You will win. And the game after that too, yes?”

She nodded. “We need to win both by a lot, and then we have a chance at the Olympics in Paris next year.”

Jordan realised then that it would most likely be Lucy’s last, and Leah’s if she started playing again soon.

There was no way that Lucy would let them lose, and that was written across her face.

“You’re going to smash it, Luce. You always do. 110%.”

She watched as Lucy softened and leant in so YFN could kiss her cheek.

“Are you sure you want to come?” Lucy murmured to her.

They all knew that she was embarrassed about the wheelchair, but she didn’t hesitate in her answer. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Plus, it’ll be easier to spot me, no?”

Lucy rolled her eyes.

Jordan loved to see them interact like this. To see them both so happy. She let herself entwine her fingers with Leah’s under the table and watched her shift and hide a smile.

“We’ll take you in,” Leah said and then gestured to the wheelchair. “To be fair – we’ll be more looked after than any celebrity going to watch with that.”

“Oh, so not quite out of the kindness of your heart then?” YFN accused with a chuckle. “Good as a battering ram too, I dare say.”

Lucy groaned. “So help me god, if you use my girl as a battering ram, I will murder you both.”

They all laughed.

“Speaking of murder…” Jordan started.

“I’m worried where this is going…”

“What’s the latest on Kristie?”

“Oh! Yes! I haven’t asked about that either – I’ve been so wrapped up in work and events and…” YFN looked down at her immobile body parts. “…this.”

Lucy wrinkled her nose and pushed her glasses back up. “I’ve been handling it. We’re going fully in. There’s a hearing next week to tie up the loose ends. Given all of the evidence, she can’t possibly contest it.” She kissed YFN’s shoulder. “I was going to talk to you about it after Friday night…”

There was a pause and a glance between them before YFN spoke.

“Thank you, love.” She said, smiling at her, seemably knowing why Lucy did the things that she did. Jordan wondered if she’d ever get to that point again with Leah as she turned to look at her. Her popular scowl wasn’t so much a scowl as Jordan held her hand. In fact, she looked almost at peace. Happier.

She turned – having been caught, and they shared a look that made the idea of going home together nerve-wracking in the best kind of way.

They spoke about the Lumos content released as they ate, all of the footballers present happy with the response so far, and eager to hear YFN’s upcoming plans for future content and/or releases. They finished their dinner and helped to tidy up – insisting when Lucy told them to leave it. She’d had a long day at training, and YFN wasn’t exactly in a position to help either.

Jordan gave her a cuddle with the promise to see them both tomorrow, while Leah collected a sleeping Blu from his spot cuddled next to Narla on the couch.

They drove home in silence with Leah’s hand held between her own in Jordan’s lap.

She watched, leant up against the door frame to the hall, as Leah gently put Blu to sleep in his bed.

They’d explored Birmingham. Driven three hours. Socialised with their friends. It was safe to say – their batteries were quite drained for anything except each other.

The entire day had been comfort and happiness. It felt like their relationship again – only better. Different. More appreciative and noticing. She watched Leah pull Blu’s little blanket up over him and kiss him goodnight like she used to, only this time with more emotion. You never love something more than when you thought you’d lost it.

It was the same for her as it was with Leah. She noticed more now. Like the strands of her blonde fringe falling across him as she leant down to kiss his head, and the wrinkles at the corner of her eyes as she leant back and smiled at him fast asleep.

Jordan stayed there as Leah pushed herself up, albeit wincing with her knee, and made her way over to her.

“Hi, you.” She murmured as she leant against the door frame with her. The height difference had her looking down as she brushed the back of her knuckles over Jordan’s cheek.

From her earlier private conversation with YFN, she found her confidence. “Lea?”

“Mmn?” She hummed, distracted by her skin under her hand.

Jordan took a breath. “I’m ready.”

ALEXIA POV

She wasn’t aware that she still had her phone to her ear until Ridley stepped forwards into her space and gently lowered her hand for her.

“You’re here,” she whispered.

“You invited me.”

At the sound of her voice, Chiquito sprinted outside and straight up her body, settling onto her shoulder and nuzzling at her face. It softened the footballer like nothing else.

Alexia was rarely caught by surprise, and yet Ridley seemed to be able to do that far too often. She managed to take away her attention from those warm, dark eyes with dancing gold flecks, to look her up and down. She was dressed in brown lace-less boots; tan, cuffed cargo parts; a white shirt and cream open button up. Her eyes moved up her neck to her lips which she’d been dreaming about just half an hour prior and then those playful, yet comforting eyes again.

“Your hand,” Alexia murmured, reaching out to rest her fingertips on it. “The cast is different.”

“You’re very observant. I had surgery again, yesterday in London.”

“Again?!” Alexia was surprised. Why would she need surgery again? “You didn’t get into another fight, did you?”

She watched her scar move as her lips twitched. “It was… an amalgamation of things. It’ll be fine.”

Alexia pocketed the phone she didn’t realise she was still holding and took her hand between her own, raising it between the two to inspect as she gently turned it over. “Just the same as before?” She asked as her thumb stroked over her two smaller fingers, taped together.

“More or less.” Alexia found her eyes again, knowing what that meant. It was worse. Before she could question it, Ridley spoke. “Are you going to invite me inside?”

“Yes… yes. Sorry. Come in.” She led the way inside, as Chiquito leapt from Ridley to Alexia as they entered her house.

She ushered the slightly taller woman to one of the high stools at the kitchen island and saw her looking around as if memorising the place.

“If I knew you were coming-”

“It’s perfect,” Ridley cut off. “Very… you.”

Was it? Alexia looked around herself. It wasn’t particularly large, but large enough to house all of her specific needs. A small pool out the back, two spare rooms, and a master ensuite separate from the other rooms for her own privacy. Alexia liked her space.

As Ridley stared around the room and reunited with Chiquito who was now on the stool opposite her, staring like he was in love, she finished cooking their breakfast, adding a little more into the pan for her unexpected guest. Due to the state of her hand, she chopped all of it up into bite size pieces before placing it down in front of her. Alexia had never cooked for Ridley before and found herself suddenly aware of that fact.

“Thank you,” she said in her perfect Spanish and looked down, her head tilting. “Are you under the impression that I’m a small child or a bird?”

She laughed. “I will not be responsible for you damaging your hand any more than it already is.”

Ridley caught her eye and gave her such a genuine smile that it melted her. “Thank you, Lex.”

Alexia merely nodded with a smile in return, though somewhat pleased with herself.

She made her way around the marble island to sit where Chiquito had vacated, leaping up onto the countertop. She was against the idea of animals on counters, though he was different. He wasn’t interested in their food, just to be around them and he sat perched there, his tail curled around his paws as his attention shifted from one to the other as they ate in a comfortable silence.

“Can I ask you something?” Alexia asked as she finished her plate.

“Yes, the food is delicious.” Ridley responded, licking the last bit of taste from her fork while maintaining eye contact.

Alexia rolled her eyes.

“Anything.”

“Where did you go?”

“Ah.” Ridley put her fork down on her plate and pushed it away. “Far enough away that I thought I’d stop thinking about you as much.”

Alexia softened at that, her heart skipping a beat. She loved when Ridley opened up and was honest with her feelings. It gave her the validation she needed. They were in this together.

“Is this the new Ridley now?” She asked, confidently. “Open and honest and her feelings?”

Ridley shared that eye contact with her – their favourite form of communication. She tilted her head slightly, as if choosing her words before she spoke.

“Is that what you’d like?”

“I’d like you to not answer my question with a question.”

The Australian smiled, her lips tilting upwards, moving that scar of hers again. Christ. Why was she so hyperaware of that?

“I believe it’s a good way to reassure you that I’m not going anywhere. So… yes.”

“Good, because it is what I’d like.”

They shared another smile as Ridley’s eyes hooded with whatever she had on her mind. It made Alexia want to shove away her pride and kiss her.

“What changed your mind? You were so against this from the beginning…” She asked before she realised she had. There was no more dancing around the subject for Alexia – she wanted all of the emotions. Anything to get out of this stale rut they had been in. God knows it had been so full of hurt.

Ridley took a deep breath, her movements slow and thought out. “I had a conversation with someone very important to me.”

Blau?

“He made me realise-”

Not Blau.

“-that what is happening between us is very special and rare, and that I owe it to a lot of important people in my life to see it through.”

That just opened up a whole other lot of questions for her. Who was he? Where did she go? Who were these important people in her life, and why had she never spoken about them until now?

She felt like Ridley could see the questions swimming around her eyes and knew from her expression that she was hesitant about sharing them. That didn’t bother her, though. Because the Australian had already come so far, and she was mindful about pushing her, like Blau had always suggested she not do.

So instead of asking – she merely stood up from her stool, took a small step forward and leant down to wrap her arms around her. Ridley’s surprise was obvious in her posture. The muscles of her shoulders and back tense under Alexia’s arms, though, she slowly softened into her.

“I’m just glad you’re back,” she said simply and honestly, letting herself enjoy the warmth, the smell and the feel of her.

Ridley’s arms came around her waist and hugged her back, both enjoying the feel of their hearts beating together, and the sides of their heads finding each other’s.

It was a while before Alexia pulled away, very aware that she was the first to break the hug, and she leant on her thigh, giving it a reassuring squeeze with a smile.

Ridley flinched and Alexia retracted her hand quickly, unsure if she’d over-stepped.

“No,” Ridley stressed, catching her wrist. “I just…”

Alexia’s eye was caught by the sight of blood seeping through her tanned cargo pants. That explained it.

“Are you okay?!”

“I’m fine. It’s just a little blood.”

“That’s more than just a little bit. Let me see.”

“Alexia, it’s fine. It’s a few stitches, that’s all.”

“How did you…” Alexia frowned as she reached out to touch her thigh near the wound. She looked back up at her as she found a better question. “Where did you go, Lee?”

Ridley sighed, her jaw shifting. She opened her mouth to speak and her phone started buzzing in her pocket. She pulled it out and her face turned serious.

“I need to take this.”

And then she was up and walking out the sliding glass door of Alexia’s apartment. She watched her out there, talking while she strode back and forth, clearly about something serious. Was it work?

Alexia turned on the TV to give Ridley her privacy while she cleaned the dishes, though she couldn’t stop herself from looking out at her pacing near the pool.

Questions swam through her head until the cocktail party effect kicked in and her attention shot to the noise in her living room. She stared at it as she watched.

It was a murder just outside of Mogadishu.

‘Somalian Pirate King assassinated’ read across the bottom of the screen in bold letters.

Blurred video footage showed hundreds dead. Blood sprayed on walls of a building. A man declaring war into a camera. Politicians hiding their secrets. A rich Arabic looking man holding his son in front of him and taking full responsibility whilst thanking an unnamed group for their heroics.

The glass door wrenched open though she paid it no mind. “Alexia, turn it off.”

“…reporters told that of one the individuals were trapped in enemy territory and escaped just prior to sunrise in an aircr-…”

The TV went black.

Alexia’s eyes flickered back to Ridley who was now staring at her, waiting.

“Where did you go?” She asked again, their eyes piercing each other.

“Dubai...” Relief flooded her body at that. “…Kenya, and Somalia.”

Her eyes flicked to the TV and back to her. “That was you?”

“It’s a complicated story. Do you have a first aid kit?”

Alexia found her kit and brought it over to her. “I didn’t ask for the story. I asked if that was you.”

Ridley sighed and sat down, grudgingly. She pulled her pants down far enough to reveal the wound on her thigh. It was worse than Alexia could have imagined.

She pulled the bandage off to reveal a nasty looking stitched wound, surrounded by a bruise that took up most of her thigh. She couldn’t help but notice just how mechanically and efficiently Ridley cleaned up the blood and replaced the bandage. Like she’d done it a thousand times.

What wasn’t she saying? Her mind immediately went to the extreme. “Are… you’re a contract… killer?”

Ridley scoffed as she pulled her pants back up. “No, Lex. I have mentioned my training to you. This shouldn't be a surprise.”

“Military?”

She gave no response, which was enough of a yes to her.

“That-,” she pointed to the black TV screen. “-was the Australian military?”

She pursed her lips, and Alexia knew that it wasn’t because she didn’t want to respond. Rather - she wasn’t allowed to. But again, her lack of response answered the question.

“I didn’t realise you still did that…”

“Occasionally. And that’s the whole point.”

“They didn’t mention your names…” she said, trying to ease her frustration. Her ‘important friends’… were they military too? It made sense.

“That’s not the point, Lex. We don’t exist. This is a very dangerous issue.”

She was staring at the coffee table – and it was very clear that her mind was running a mile a minute.

Would Alexia be dragged into it all? How far would it go? The man yelling seemed very… vengeful.

Perhaps she should have been distraught. Scared away. Shocked to no end. But somewhere inside her – she already knew. She knew from the way she’d distanced herself and bore so much pain and burden. Alexia had seen that haunted shadow in her eyes before, and that could only come from something as morally objectionable as what she had seen and done.

But she knew her. Ridley wasn’t a killer, she was a protector. And although the images had been confronting, she knew it would have been justified. She’d just needed to give her time to open up this part of her life to her.

Alexia sat next to her and reached out to touch her hand with her fingertips. Ridley’s attention broke and she looked at her, a little surprised.

“Why are you not disgusted? Telling me to fuck off and never come back? You saw-” she ended her sentence abruptly.

“I know you,” she whispered, stroking the back of her hand. “You’re a good person.”

She felt like Ridley was falling into her eyes as the Australian trembled some emotions out in a deep exhale.

“Was that what your phone call was about?” Alexia murmured, enjoying that impressed look Ridley flashed.

“It was. I need to leave for a while.”

Her heart stopped. “Again?”

“Not for long. We think it’s best to avoid my usual spots for now while we… find… him.”

The man from the TV. Was he after her?

“Would you like to come with me?”

How could she ever say no to that face?

“I need to be around the team for support. I’m the Captain.”

“And the Spanish team don’t deserve you. The girls do, but management doesn’t. And I guarantee that the team wants you to take all of the time you need to rest, relax and rehab. There are other Captains for a reason.”

Was she running away from her responsibilities?

Ridley reached out and brushed her fingertips across her cheek. “You’ve given enough, la Reina. Let Alexia rest and come back stronger than ever.”

A shiver ran up her spine and she felt her pupils dilate. Honestly, she didn’t need any reason to run away with Ridley. She never had. She just needed to tell her pride to step away and realise that she would make the best decisions for her heart.

“When?”

“Hm. Well I was originally coming over to ask you to come somewhere with me tonight.. but I can call and extend our stay.”

Yes. Yes. “Where..?”

“Oh, just a little bit of a journey. Not too far. I’ll keep you entertained; I promise.”

Alexia smiled almost shyly as she leant into her fingertips. She’d never had anyone plan a holiday for her before.

Would she go? Could she go?

“Is that a yes? Use your words, la Reina.”

She didn’t give her the satisfaction of responding immediately. In fact, her pride crept back up as if remembering the hurt of the last few days. The uncertainty prior to that.

“I’m not sure,” she murmured as she moved away from her hand and took the first aid kit back to its home. She turned and almost bumped into Ridley; those dark eyes intense. She softened as she reached out and gently moved a piece of her blonde hair from her face, her fingertips gliding over her skin so softly that she could barely feel them if not for the tremble up her back.

“You’re not sure about me.” A question within a statement.

“I need to know you’re not going anywhere. And for that I need… time.”

“We don’t have time,” she replied softly, thinking hard. “I need to leave Spain tonight. Can I give you something other than time, Lex? The promise of a date. The planning of a holiday together. I could leave something here so you know I’ll always come back for it…”

“A date can be changed. A holiday can be missed. And you don’t care about possessions. Unless you have an alternative.”

“I care about you.”

“Are you calling me a possession?”

Ridley smirked. “Nobody could ever possess you, Alexia. You are not a possession. A prize, certainly.  Greater than any other. Lucky for anyone to be close enough to see, touch or hear you. Just to be in your vicinity…” She stopped herself as Alexia felt herself drowning in the beat of her own heart. “But no, not a possession.”

A pause as she took in those honest, loving words. Is that really how special she saw her?

“You won’t leave?”

“I won’t.”

“You’re here to stay?”

“For good.”

“You promise? No matter what happens?” She whispered, as if worried to scare this perfect scenario away.

“I promise. No matter what happens.”

There was nothing but pure honesty in those eyes she had to lean back to look into. “You’re telling the truth.”

“Mmn. I will always tell you the truth.”

“Oh really?” Alexia tilted her head. “Then tell me what you’re thinking right now.”

“I’m thinking that I have an alternative to time.”

And then before Alexia could respond, react or even breathe, Ridley kissed her.

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#1: The Hand (1.01)

The level of excitement, anxiety, joy, and anticipation I felt just before pressing play on the TOWL premiere was so high. My Richonne was finally coming back. 🥹 And man did they just snatch my heart for an entire hour with their return. I already knew seeing them again would be euphoric, but it was even more than I could have guessed. And the TOWL premiere dives right in with a very emotional, wild, and impactful first few minutes...

When deciding on a deadline for having these RIR: Towl Edition posts ready, I figured today, July 22, would be a great kickoff day since it's the anniversary of when The Ones Who Live was first announced at SDCC. 👌🏽😊

I remember where I was the day I first saw the TOWL announcement in 2022. I was in the middle of moving to a new place and saw an article pop up on my phone with a picture of Andy and Danai hand in hand at Comic-Con. I was just happy to see them.

And then I looked down at the article’s headline and saw they were there to announce that there would be a Rick and Michonne miniseries. 🤩 I was already overjoyed by that, but then, my joy just skyrocketed even more when I saw that they were coming back specifically for a miniseries focused on Rick and Michonne’s “epic love story” with Andy, Danai, and Scott as co-creators and executive producers. 😍

I knew we were about to have an absolute feast with this show our captains cooked up - and feast we most certainly did. This 6 episode miniseries is a six-course meal. 🍽

And I think TOWL is excellent on its own and has a lot of widespread appeal but when I’ve seen people say The Ones Who Live felt like it was particularly for the Richonne fans, there’s also a very clear explanation for that: the show was made by three Richonne fans. Scott, Andy, and Danai…they’re us. 😋

And I am so grateful to them for the beautiful gift that is The Ones Who Live. 😌

So this first post is a bit longer because I gotta come out the gate extra and even offer up some thoughts on the TWD clips that they included just before the premiere starts. I really liked how it sets up TOWL and highlights the power of Richonne’s relationship. 

They start by showing the iconic pilot shot of Rick on his horse riding along the barren side of a freeway as we hear his voice say, “We tell ourselves we are the walking dead.”

And then they include the iconic shot of Michonne’s TWD entrance from season 2.

They then show a clip from season 6, just a few episodes before Richonne would be canon. In the clip, Michonne is on the patio with Rick (and his elevator eyes) as she helps him see, “We’re in here together.”

I love this because in reminding Rick that they’re alive and breathing right here and now and have the room to make ASZ home it shows how Michonne was the one who helped change Rick’s motto from “We’re the walking dead” to “We’re the ones who live.” It’s one of the many ways she changed his life. 😌

They show some Say Yes moments, and you know I love that Richonne episode down. Seeing them use clips from the beloved 7.12, I remember just marveling over how years ago we were so excited just to get a single episode focused on Richonne and now we were gearing up to watch a whole miniseries dedicated to them. 🥰 Never getting over that blessing.

Rick says, “We’re gonna lose people, maybe even each other” as the clip ushers in its first gut punch of the hour by showing Rick and Michonne at their son Carl’s side after he reveals he’s been bit. 🥺

They also show Rick telling Michonne “You can lose me” in the Say Yes van and her saying “No.” We’ll talk about it more in a later post, but just as many of us suspected - Richonne cannot in fact lose each other and live on the same. While losing each other is and was physically possible, in every other way losing each other made them lose the most crucial parts of themselves.

Then they show Rick in his final TWD ep, preparing to blow up the bridge as his voiceover tells Michonne “If it’s me who doesn’t make it, you’re gonna have to lead the others forward because you’re the one who can.”

We see Michonne scream his name as Rick blows up the bridge and then they show our sweet older Judith as Rick says “Making a future for Judith, it’ll be worth it.” And I always love that 9.05 shot of Judith because of how it incorporates Rick, Carl, and Michonne with the holster, hat, and sword on her back. She along with RJ is an embodiment of their legacy and the future Richonne believed in.

Then they show Michonne slaying a walker as she says “We can make it. I’m not giving up.” And it just all really hammers home the resilience of Richonne and their love and partnership. They’ve been through so much, built so much, and lost so much, but they still stand because of each other and the family they created. 

After they give us some CRM insight with clips of Jadis (😒), they show scenes of Michonne and Judith’s last conversation where they both decide Michonne will go and look for The Brave Man. I’m glad they included that because some viewers really tend to forget that Judith urged her mom to go look for her dad and Michonne left not as an act of abandonment, but as the ultimate act of love for her family.

The TWD clips ends with Michonne saying “Okay baby girl I’m gonna try” and Judith saying “Go get him.” I love that even with everyone else thinking they were crazy, Michonne and Judith never stopped believing Rick was out there. (And RJ was believing too. 🥹 But I'm getting way ahead of myself lol)

And then --- the show we’ve all been waiting for begins and the TOWL premiere has a devastatingly poignant teaser. 🥺

I like how The Ones Who Live's opener connects to the last of the TWD clips because Michonne tells her baby girl she’s gonna try and then we hear Rick’s voice start the show by saying, “I tried. Please know I tried.”

It moves me how much Rick and Michonne have been trying for each other while apart. And it’s crushing to hear Rick say 'tried' in the past tense as he now debates no longer trying anymore since he's learned he can’t be with his family again or else risk putting them in harm's way.

After years of waiting to finally see what Rick has been up to all this time, they immediately let us know it has been an excruciatingly painful existence for him without his family. 😢

gif cred: @perryabbott

I like how the shot opens with Rick facing away from the camera as he stares out the window at a cold industrial view. Rick facing away from us almost gives this sense that we know him but we also don’t fully know him anymore. He’s been through a lot we haven’t seen.

The vintage TV delivers news of a massive attack in the background and similar to the destruction on the television, Rick also feels destroyed by the CRM and at his lowest here. 

gif cred: @nerd4music

Then I love how before we even see Rick's face, we see him holding one of his phone sketches of Michonne. This show did a great job of immediately setting up the way Richonne’s love would be at the center of every scene in this story.

This shot of Michonne on the phone let you know instantly that the love between Richonne is still so alive and important to Rick and the miniseries. It’s also painful because it’s like Rick is finally accepting that those little drawings really could be the last he ever gets to “see” her after fighting so hard to believe he would see her again for real one day. 

And it’s very symbolic to have him look at Michonne on the phone and then see his own reflection in it. They’re one. It’s also significant that the first we see of Rick’s face is through a reflection. Again he’s him, but he’s not fully him rn. Just a reflection. And the part of him he misses most is his other half - Michonne. 

gif cred: @richonne4life

One of the tragic aspects of these two soulmates being separated for so long is that Rick and Michonne were not the type of couple who needed absence to make the heart grow fonder. Like they didn’t need to lose each other to realize how special their love was. When they were together they were fully aware of the gift their relationship was in their lives and they treasured their love deeply and out loud.

So being apart has only heightened what Rick and Michonne already knew full well which is that they are the love of each other's lives. They’re everything to each other. They knew it back then. And they know it still now, even after being away from each other longer than they’ve been together. 

It’s such a big deal for Rick to look at this phone in this moment as he contemplates ending it. I noticed that anytime Rick thinks he’s about to die, he thinks of Michonne. It's as though he’s eager for his last moment of life and his last thought to be of her so that he can end on some semblance of a positive note.

When he’s on the bridge in TWD 9.05, Michonne is his last hallucination. When he later chops off his hand and fades out of consciousness he dreams of her. And here when he contemplates dying by his own hand, he looks at this image of her just before. It makes me think of that TikTok that went viral about a man saying his last breath will be his wife’s name. That is definitely Rick’s mindset and I love that Richonne’s love runs that deep. 

Rick looks out with tears in his eyes - just sadness personified - and then he stares at the shard of glass in his hand, contemplative, before putting the glass to his neck. The acting Andy does in this moment is incredibly powerful and painful. I know award shows disappointingly tend to completely sleep on the performances from the TWD cast but truly to me he secured every award nomination just within his first few seconds of being on screen.

There’s something so viscerally vulnerable about this moment as Rick stares at the glass really wondering if after everything he’s been through and overcome, it’s really come to this - meeting his demise by his own hand with a little piece of glass.

Plus with how resilient Rick is, it’s like we see this massive internal fight to go against everything in him that’s a survivor and actively choose to stop surviving once and for all.

My heart just instantly broke from this teaser because while yes we know Rick won’t go through with it, to know that he was even in the headspace of this makes me hurt for him deeply. To think he was ready to potentially just go out, alone, depressed, never seeing his family again and them never knowing he was out there, feeling like a failure. It’s extremely dark.

gif cred: @vidco

Throughout his time on TWD, Rick’s journey has been as much a mental battle as it has been an external battle and as we saw in the TWD pilot, Rick is extremely perseverant but without his family, he is not opposed to just ending it.

And now, he's tried so hard for so many years to get back to Michonne and Judith, he stayed alive off the memory of family and the hope of being with family again - But once he realized it was no longer an option unless he risked putting the ones he loves in immense danger, that was it for him. In this moment he no longer sees the point in living if he has to live without his wife and daughter. 🥺

I found it powerfully poignant to have a show called The Ones Who Live begin by having Rick about to take his life. It shows that for Rick, there’s an asterisk on that motto because he feels he’s only 'the one who lives' if he gets to live with Michonne. It’s either ‘the ones who live together’ or nothing at all for Rick. 

So he nearly goes through with this attempt. Even draws some blood on his neck...but then he stops. Thank goodness. 🙏🏽 He sucks his teeth and sighs as he stares at the shard of glass looking defeated but also resolved that he can’t go through with it. Not like this.

Through this teaser, we instantly get his state of mind. He can’t end it all but he’s been in so much pain that it feels like the only way through is to die. It’s utterly tragic. 🥺

And I truly feel like part of why Rick couldn’t go through with it is because he and Michonne genuinely are one. So his life is not just his to take.

So long as Michonne is still out there and her heart is still beating then his heart still has to beat too, even if he has to die in other ways to somehow go on without her. We’ll also learn more about why he doesn’t go through with it in his heartbreakingly romantic last letter to Michonne, but we’ll get there. 👌🏽

So then we see the back of Rick again as he ends the night accepting his dreary fate to live but truly as the walking dead from now on. And I really like how the show explores the dark and damaging side of having to tell yourself you’re the walking dead. As well as the dark side of being 'the one who lives' even when everything in you wants to quit living because now you have to live without those you love.

When Rick gave the speech about his grandpa and them being the Walking Dead in TWD 5.10, Daryl responded saying, “We ain’t them.” Rick agreed with that because so long as you have family you aren’t the Walking Dead.

But that’s the thing - Rick hasn’t had his family for years and so he really did have to become the Walking Dead. But as he’ll say at the end of the series (jumping way ahead again, I know lol) he thought he was alone, but he wasn’t. His kids and wife especially were still believing in him and still loving him out there.

I like to think that just like Michonne could feel Rick out there with all the love he was emitting from afar toward her, Rick too could feel all the love she was emitting to him and it kept him here a bit longer. And thank goodness for that because my beloved Rick Grimes' story deserves a bright positive ending, not one this dark and depressing, after everything he's been through. 

As the teaser ends and Rick stares into the CRM void, I like the score. The music almost feels like a menacing weighed-down heartbeat which is fitting.

And then there's the beautiful title sequence, which I adore the music and every Richonne image during the theme song. I like how it starts with Rick and Michonne in each other's arms from season 8, letting you know that while the teaser was very dark, there is light coming and that light is called Richonne.

(Also, I really wanted Rick to see Michonne in her corset armor during the show but since he didn’t, I’m glad there’s at least a gorgeous image of the two of them together during the theme song that includes her in the armor.)

I also liked the way the first ep just shows Rick under the title since it’s a Rick-centric episode and then the second episode has just Michonne under the title for the Michonne-centric episode. All and all, this whole opener was a very impactful way to kick off the show and set the tone for what Rick has been through and become in the years he's been away.

All the chatter from certain parts of the audience who thought Rick would move on and even have a new family in the Civic Republic was immediately dispelled because those speculations were always a ridiculous misunderstanding of the character. He found his everything in Michonne so of course he’s still as in love with her now as he was the day we last saw them together in season 9. Just like Michonne still stayed in love with him.

I love that they both refused to move on from each other and operated as in love as ever. And because they held onto that love, even when it felt like all was lost, that love was able to return to them. 👌🏽

So next, we get into some action as we’re taken to 5 years after the bridge. We see Rick and his iconic walk as he stands in the forest with other consignees. And it was such a joy to see him back on screen and know we were finally going to get the continuation of his story. 🙌🏽

gif cred: @vidco

Rick holds a CRM hatchet, which also feels symbolic because it’s similar to one of his signature TWD weapons, but it’s marked by the CRM showing they’ve in many ways attempted to claim him. 

Rick is also the only consignee with a leash, clearly illustrating that he’s a lil different than the rest. He’s the one who doesn’t want to be here and will try to escape if given the chance and the CRM knows this about him. Along with attempting to claim him, this leash makes it feel like the CRM is also attempting to tame him like he's a defiant animal.

gif cred: @nerd4music

As Rick looks around and takes a breath you can tell he’s fully made up his mind about what he’s about to do with his most extreme escape attempt yet.

gif cred: @andy-clutterbuck

Rick runs to take out walkers and again seeing him back in action is such a sight for sore eyes. He’s still got it. 👌🏽 However, because he looks all healthy and strong I think some can miss that Rick is still very much in mental disarray from battling the psychological torment of being taken and trapped all these years. Like he might look normal and fine (and I do mean that in all the ways 😇) but he's not mentally healthy right now.

(Side note: I really love the look of this whole night scene with the deep blues and fiery reds. The budget was doing its thing in TOWL. 👏🏽🔥)

gif cred: @nerd4music

So Rick runs far enough that the leash pulls him to the ground. A soldier yells at him and he says “Sorry. Trying to find my axe.” Look at our cute little liar. 😋

And then the show gets right into the wildness by having Rick put a belt around his arm and proceed to chop off his own hand. It’s insane😳.

It's also very reminiscent of when Negan nearly made Rick chop off Carl’s arm in the season 7 premiere. Chopping his own hand off in these woods was more doable for Rick than had he had to chop off Carl’s arm because it’s his family he cares about far more than himself.

As Rick prepares to do the chop he repeats “This is how” as in this is how he gets home. It hurts my heart that he feels this is the only way.🥺

But it's really moving to see that he’s willing to do something this intense to get back to his love. Also, this is 5 years after the bridge, so this means that even a half a decade later Rick was still as determined as ever to break free and get back to Michonne.

The people I watch with and I had a whole discussion on whether chopping the hand the way he did was daftly executed by the show considering it’s such an extreme thing to do in this situation where Rick was never going to successfully get away bleeding out like that with CRM soldiers so close by.

But my argument was that the 'ill-thought-out' element of this escape plan is part of the point.

For 5 years atp, Rick has been isolated from all love and warmth and is deteriorating mentally day by day. In this extremely damaged state, he’s not thinking straight, and cutting off his hand is a last-ditch effort that shows he will try absolutely anything, sound or unsound, to get back to Michonne and Judith.

Yes, he possibly could have just cut off the thumb or hacked at the leash but the extreme approach Rick took also conveys that he’s not all there right now and he’s as desperate as he’s ever been to finally break free and go home. It also informs us that his more sane escape attempts haven't worked and so now Rick Grimes is willing to try the insane stuff to get back to his family.

Think about the mindset he has to be in to go against natural human instinct and chop off his own hand. It’s crazy, but it immediately lets us know that even the most impractical solutions are now what it’s come to for him. 

gif cred: @nat111love

So basically, if it seems super reckless for him to do it this way, that’s the intention imo. He’s so worn down and off mentally from his debilitating circumstances that he’ll do anything whether it’s the wise thing or not, he doesn’t care anymore. Anything to get back to her.

The traditional saying is 'asking for her hand in marriage,' but here we see Rick, the ultimate lover boy, be like 'What if I literally give my hand for my marriage.' If there’s one thing TOWL made perfectly clear it’s that Rick and Michonne have crazy love. 💯

And while yes his escape plan could have been more thought through, my baby Rick did show some smart thinking by putting the ax in the fire to make the chop easier so you gotta give him that. 😌👌🏽

After he cuts off his hand this horror music plays as Rick proceeds to make a run for it. He has to lean behind a tree dazed as he bleeds profusely.

It’s crazy because the last time we saw Rick in a full episode of TWD he was bleeding out and now here he is intensely injured again and going through the wringer. I was so eager for whenever this man would finally get some much-deserved rest. 

gif cred: @twdfranchise

Rick then has the strength to take out a walker and cauterize the wound by plunging his arm into the fire inside it. This whole thing was an effective way to show early that one; Rick is built different and two; this man will endure literally anything to get home. And home is very much not a place but his wife and daughter.

So then he tries to make a run for it as CRM soldiers near closer and I honestly think with this being his fourth escape attempt this was really a “go home or die trying" attempt. Like I think Rick knew that dying tonight was a very real possibility.

The soldiers knock Rick down and he lays on the ground defeated and drained as he stares at the burning corpse of a walker that’s certainly meant to reflect how he feels as well. Almost like the burning desire to go home has officially consumed him and taken him out.

Feeling like a corpse himself, Rick fades out of consciousness as soldiers approach. And then we get to enter Rick’s lovely mind and see where he goes when at his wit's end.

And y’all, these first two TOWL scenes to analyze were pretty hefty, dark, and depressing, so it’s time we get to something lighter and happier to dive into. And what’s better and brighter than Rick’s beautiful dream world with his beautiful dream girl? 😌👌🏽🌟

[girliism]

(18+)

rockstar!patrick zweig is all your friends can talk about on the ride over to the concert day 2. “i can’t believe he came up to you??”, “what’d you guys talk about?”, “did you let him slip a finger in?” your friends interrogated the whole way inside of the venue, the only answers they got were your eye rolls.

“patrick! you can’t just invite random girls backstage cause you think they’re hot!” “she’s right, i mean we have all kinds of stuff back her-.” “art!, hop off tashi’s strap for like one second and think about me! i deserve pussy too.” a muffled argument between the band coming for the green room can be faintly heard.

the stage manager that leading us stopped in front of the door and told us “just give a few knocks and the band will open up.” before walking off. your friends were practically buzzing with excitement you could almost hear how hard their hearts were beating in their chests.

your three friends are kinda just staring at the door as if it would magically open. “…so who’s gonna knock?” “i think you should you.” “why me??” “you liked them first!” they were whisper shouting back and forth “i will knock.” you say

suddenly you feel nervous, your hand frozen in front of the door while the butterflies in your stomach start to wake up. come on knock it’s just a door.

so, you do.

a tall girl with long curly hair and brown skin opens the door wearing a bikini top and low raise jeans. you all stop breathing. is it even possible to be that gorgeous?

“you, you’re tashi duncan.” your friend says breathlessly. “PATRICK, your company is here.” she yells to him before turning back to you guys. “you guys can come in” tashi moves aside to let us in. soft thank yous are whispered as you all walk in.

patrick walks over to the four of you saying your name. “hey, you came.” the brunette smiles down at you. before you could even open your mouth your friend answers for you. “of course she came”

you’re sitting on a couch the band has in their green room watching you friends interact with art and tashi when patrick walks over to you. “you look bored” patrick leans down to whisper in your ear. you have to ignore the goosebumps that arise in order to answer “i am, just a little.” you say scrunching your nose looking up at him.

he thinks you’re cute.

patrick nods for a second before standing up and telling you to follow him. you do so with some hesitation and confusion. “hey, guys i’m gonna show her the bathroom we’ll be back soon.” nods and murmurs of ok were thrown your way, your friends too encapsulated by the way arts fingers looks twirling his drum stick.

you and patrick walk side by side arms lightly brushing every now and then as he lead you to some mysterious location. “here we are!” patrick says leaning against a door. “….it’s a storage room.” the urge to go home was steadily growing

patrick rolls his eyes pushing off the door so he can open it. “wrong, it’s not just any storage room. this is where they put our extra instruments. go in.” despite your better judgment you go in. it’s pitch black only the sounds of heavy breathing coming from the both of you can be heard. god please don’t let this be my end. you silently pray before turning around to be face to face with the hot guitarist.

“you take all your girls here.” you say in a whisper eyes slowly adjusting to the dark. you could almost make out his sharp features. “nah, they usually only make it til after i’ve cum.” he whispers back.

you can hear the smugness in his voice. “hm nice.” you say scoffing, guys and their arrogance. “i’m sorry i’m sorry that wasn’t nice. i swear my mother raised me better, i can prove it.” you pause for a moment, how should i go about this? this is a seasoned fuckboy you’re talking to and he already thinks he has a chance.

“prove it how?” you really hope your standoffish attitude is making up for the fact that you’ve slowly been getting wetter and wetter since you walked in here. “well instead of just out right kissing you i’m gonna be a perfect gentleman and ask.” you tell by the way he’s talking he’s got that crooked smile on his face just like when he first came up to you.

you don’t really remember how you responded, the only thing going through your head is how good patrick’s rough calloused hands feel on the soft skin of your waist. the way his lips fit so perfectly with yours as he kisses you.

patrick zweig taste like cigarettes and mint. his teeth are sharp as he bites your bottom lip. and you’re so shameless, moaning out loud as he begins kissing and sucking at you neck.

“you do this with all the guys you first meet?” he ask his hand leaving your waist traveling up under your shirt to grab at your breast. you hate yourself for the sound that comes out of you because of that. “fuck you.” you mutter out. “gladly.”

patrick hikes your mini skirt up over your ass before teasing his fingers along the top of your lacy underwear. “can i?” he ask softly, oh how badly you wish the lights were on you could see him.

“yeah, yes please.” you moan out grinding yourself down onto his thigh that was slotted between your leg. once given the ok patrick drags his fingers up and down your clothed pussy smirking at how your wetness is already leaking through before pulling your panties to the side.

his fingers spilt you open no warning and you’re moaning and whining as your mouth falls open at the feeling of patrick scissoring his fingers in your in. “you’re so fucking tight. your not a virgin are you?”

“shut up, it’s just been awhile ok.” patrick laughs at that before pulling your shirt up and dragging you’re bra down, bringing his mouth down to you nipple to start sucking and biting at it. “perfect tits, perfect pusssy, so glad i found you.”

you’re getting louder and louder you have to slam your lips back on patrick’s to shut yourself up when his fingers speed up and his thumb starts rubbing circles on your clit. “close. so close” you whine into his mouth.

your pussy was tightening around his fingers so tight patrick couldn’t help but imagine how good this would around his cock. “you gonna cum pretty girl, gonna cum on my fingers in a storage room like a whore.”

you hated how hot his words made you feel. “m’not a whore. just wanna cum please.” at that patrick finally curled his fingers up almost instantly finding that sweet spot inside of you that made you cry out. head falling back, knees buckling and toes curling in your heeled boots as you cum all over his fingers. patrick fucks you though your high fingers pumping in and out of you slowly before he pulls them free.

heavy breathing fills the room patrick sucks his fingers clean as you shimmy your skirt back down. “you taste good.” he compliments. you face burns but you still say thank you.

“i have to get out on stage, but we should do this in the light sometime.” he says opening the door to the outside world. you squint your eyes at the sudden change of light. “yeah, come find me at the after party maybe.” you say.

patrick laughs while walking adjusting his pants so his boner is less noticeable.

you bump into your friends on your way back to the green thoughts still on what happened back in the storage room. “hey where the hell were you? you weren’t shitting were you?” your friend questions hooking your arm with hers. no i was getting fingered in a storage room by a guy i just met yesterday. you think but don’t say.

“yeah she was totally shitting.” your other friend says the four of you laughing as you get escorted to the side stage to watch the concert from way up close.

(sorry this was super long 😭 but i hope y’all’s like it!) part three part five

[bullet-prooflove]

They say there’s no time left So, let’s live for tonight

For Kayce Dutton

Tagging: @kmc1989 @midnightheat @queenslandlover-93 @littledreamer9211

Bonfire Heart - Kayce starts to feel something for the first time since Monica.

Jean Jacket - Kayce loves the sight of you in his jacket.

Changing of the Seasons - Kayce realises he misses you.

More (NSFW) - Kayce tells you he needs more.

Final Words - Kayce discovers the truth about Lee.

As always time runs out on you and Kayce, after a year of doing this he should be used to it but he’s not, he never is. When you straddle his hips tonight, he can tell you feel it too. You’re softer then all of the other times, more tender. Your fingertips ghost along his jaw as you look into his eyes and Kayce can see how hard this is for you, it’s hard for him too.

His hands chase all over your skin as you make love in the darkness, the sound of your hitched breathing resounding through the air as he hits that sweet spot, over and over and over again until you combust like a star underneath his hands.

You’re beautiful in the moment, wild, untamed, everything that Kayce has spent his entire life craving and it’s at that point that he realises how far he’s fallen, how deeply in love with you he really was.

Stay he wants to say, stay with me.

But he doesn’t because a woman like you, she needs to be free and Kayce, he understands that more than anyone.

It’s the next morning that he says goodbye to you on his front porch, his thumb chases over the apple of your cheek as his forehead comes to rest upon yours.

“Stay in touch alright?” He whispers, his lips ghosting over yours. “I wouldn’t mind hearing from you every once in a while.”

“We’ll see.” You tell him and that’s all that he can ask for because you don’t do commitment, it doesn’t make sense when you’re on the road for the majority of the year.

It’s a week later that Kayce’s phone rings, he’s expecting it to be Ryan or Rip, filling him in on some bullshit he needs to fix up in the pastures. He doesn’t expect to hear your voice or the way that something just lights up in his chest when he does.

It becomes a regular thing, you calling him from the road. You fill him in on your exploits, on Travis slowing down his antics. You think he’s seeing someone and the two of you spend an entire evening trying to work out who it is that has captured the old rodeo king’s heart.

It’s when you get back in his orbit he realises just how much everything has changed. Instead of turning up in his bed the way you usually do, you hug him with a ferocity he feels in the very depths of his bones on the porch.

“Christ, I’ve missed you.” You say as he clasps you close and he understands how much the concession costs you, that by telling him that, you’re choosing to take a risk on him.

“Oh Darlin.” He whispers, his lips brushing over your hairline. “Lord knows I’ve missed you too.”

Love Kayce? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

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Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[charlesf1leclerc]

👨‍👩‍👦🚗 with oscar and lando, maybe oscar and reader are both rookies this season and lando is attractived to both of them but thinks he doesn’t have a chance since their together but the two feel the same and they get together 👍🏼

A/N- I love writing all these blurbs there are more coming. They are filling my time so we’ll keep sending them in no limit for the next 4 days hahah you guys are so creative I love it so much 

You currently laid on Oscar’s chest as he storked your hair. You didn’t know if now was the right time to reveal your inner thoughts but of course you were always one to speak your mind and not worry about consequences.

“ lando did well today getting on the podium” you commented. Oscars hand stopped and then started again 

“ yeah he did “ he replied softly

“ not gonna lie it was kinda hot” again you always spoke your mind no matter what

“ the weather yeah it was “ 

“ well yes but also Lando and you sweaty from the race”

“ are you saying I’ve got competition y/l/n “

“ you just might piastri” 

It wasn’t until the next race the topic came up for you again 

You were currently on your way from your garage to Oscar’s after Fp1 only to realise he wasn’t in the garage but Lando was. So of course you went over to keep him company.  

“ hey lan” you smiled walking closer to the young man

“ oh hey y/n , Oscar’s not here at the moment”

“ I don’t care about Oscar right now “ you whispered moving closer to him 

He coughed “ good practice today huh we all seemed good out there” 

“ are you nervous lando “ you ignored his comment 

“ no just don’t think we should be this close when your you know with Oscar”

“ it’s fine trust me he doesn’t care”

Lando gave you a questioning look and it was then that your boyfriend finally walked in the room.

Lando stepped back from you. 

“ it’s not what it looks like” he spoke defensively 

Oscar laughed and moved to wrap his arm around you “ don’t worry we want you”

Lando looked baffled “ really?” 

“Of course” you spoke 

“ won’t people think this is weird”

“Is that you way of saying you want us too” Oscar gazed at him 

“ well of course look at you guys but what will everyone think I mean three drivers dating?”

“We’re the only people who matter” Oscar promised. 

[ellethespaceunicorn]

The Howling of Claw Creek Forest, Chapter One

Chapter One: Hide and Seek 

Rating: Mature, 18+, Minors - DNI 

Pairing: Werewolf!Walter Marshall x Reader 

Word Count: 2.7K 

Series Summary: You live in a small town called Claw Creek, surrounded by a deep, dark forest. Since you were a kid, an urban legend of the creature in the woods has been told. If the distant howls at night and mutilated livestock are anything to go by, you fear the stories to be true. 

Chapter Summary: After a curfew is set in place, you and your best friend sneak out past the town border for a drunken game of hide and seek. What could go wrong? 

Warnings: drinking, peril, mention of blood 

A/N: A special thank you to @peyton-warren for being my lovely beta and soundboard for this.  

Dividers by me 

Support/Reblog banner by me 

Cover Art by me 

Series Masterlist 

My Masterlist 

“C’mon, girl. You need to get out of the house for more than just work and the coffee shop. Look, we’ll even stay in town. Just please don’t make me stay in and watch The Great British Bake Off again. Paul Hollywood’s eyes still haunt my dreams.” Your best friend drapes herself against the couch in a dramatic show of boredom. 

“Liv, you’re the one that agreed to wine and TV. So, what? You wanna hit the bar now?” You guess, sitting on the arm of the couch. 

“Yuck. No way. I was thinking of something much more exciting. But you gotta agree to it before we go. That’s the deal.” She props her head up on her fists, while she lays on her stomach, letting her feet swing in the air back and forth. As innocent as she looks, you knew better. 

But then again, you could always go for a little adventure.  

And that is how you ended up in a clearing in Claw Creek Forest with Olivia, a heart full of optimism, and a six-pack of Jack Daniels Watermelon Punch. By the time you are halfway done with your second bottle, the sounds of the night are almost calming. Crickets are chirping, owls are hooting, and leaves are rustling in the light wind that tickles your neck. 

You’re downing the rest of your drink and looking up into the sky when Liv suddenly stands up with a look that can only mean one thing. She’s got a terrible idea that she thinks is genius. 

You decide to stop her before she even starts, “Girl, whatever idea just popped into your head after two wine coolers is not gonna be as brilliant as you think it is. Just say it so I can turn it down.” You twist off the top of your third bottle and look up at the defeated face of your best friend. 

“Damn, way to try and spoil all the fun. I just wanted to have a chugging contest.” She sits down on the fallen log next to you and grabs the last bottle from the cardboard pack. She twists off the top and you nudge her with your elbow before winking at her. 

You smile at each other before bringing your bottles to your lips. The rush of the bubbly drinks makes you both stop every few sips to breathe and burp a little. But in the end, you finish your bottle first and shoot up off the log to slam down your empty bottle. 

The moment you are upright, the blood rushes to your head and you instantly feel ten times more drunk. A few seconds later, you feel like you even out and you can hear Liv’s laughing as she falls backward off the log and her drink goes flying. You crumple to the ground, laughing your ass off, until she pops up over the log with a small scowl on her face. 

“Oh, you think that’s funny, huh?” She stands up and brushes off her pants before picking up her now empty bottle along with yours. Her little attitude is adorable, but you don’t dare say that. As she walks past you, she doesn’t look at you. 

“Olivia, don’t be like that. Come on, girl. We’re having a good time! I don’t want it to end. Please?” You’re not too proud to beg, and she’s not the only one who can pout charmingly. 

When she turns around, the first thing she does is look at your pout and scoff, “OK, fine. But I’m only staying if we play a game of hide and seek. It’s spooky season, after all. Well, technically, in my head it’s always spooky season, but you get it.”  

“You wanna play hide and seek...in the woods...in the dead of night...drunk?” You hoped there was enough moonlight so that she could see the incredulous look on your face. 

Wiggling her eyebrows, Liv bites her bottom lip and says, “All of those things together are so perfect. We’re drunk. It’s nighttime. Spoo-ooky woods all around. Come on, babe, the kid versions of us would be so proud to say we weren’t too scared to play hide and seek as adults with barely any wits about us.” As soon as she finishes speaking, the cutest little hiccup escapes her, and you can’t help but laugh and shake your head. 

“Fine! But I’m hiding first. Count to 30 so my drunk ass can find a good spot around here. And don’t cheat, Liv!” You direct her to face a tree and cover her eyes so she cannot sneak a peek at where you are going. You also make her count loudly so that she can barely hear your footsteps crunching over the leaves. 

Even drunk, you are surprised you can think of all that. You back up slowly, turning around to run in a full sprint in the opposite direction. When the tree cover blocks out the light of the moon, you slow down and pull out your phone to use the flashlight to light up your way. 

You don’t know if you got very far in 30 seconds or if Liv just stopped counting, but you can’t hear her anymore. You turn off your flashlight so she can’t use that to find you. You tip-toe forward in case she has gotten closer to you. You find a tree with large roots above ground and decide to try and hide in the little alcove it is shaped into. 

But something catches your eye. At first, you think someone is shining a flashlight or something a bit away from you. But flashlights don’t usually blink, do they? But if you can remember correctly, you’ve seen those glowing yellow eyes before.  

And now they were slowly moving toward you. The glow of the moon illuminated dark fur covering pointed ears and a muzzle that only hid its teeth for a moment. As those fangs came into view, a billow of hot breath turned into a smoke cloud in the frigid night air. The sudden huff of the beast made you realize you weren’t moving. You were standing stock-still while an imposing wolf thought about making you into its dinner.  

Turning on a dime, you begin to run further into the forest. Not looking where you were going, you didn’t see the pile of rocks in your path. Your right foot slips, and you fall face-first onto the unyielding ground. You grunt as your head connects with a sharp stone. Your head starts to swim as you try to lift yourself to continue running, another huff directly behind you scares you enough to flip over onto your back.  

Ringing starts in your ears, and you suddenly feel light-headed. You start to hyperventilate as the wolf comes closer. As tunnel vision closes in, you think you hear it whine softly. The last thing you feel is a wet snout against your temple and then nothingness. 

What was once the sensation of cold wetness is replaced by warmth as you start to regain consciousness. You reach a hand up to your forehead and feel a wet cloth being pressed against your temple. When your hand touches what is holding it there, your eyes shoot open, and you try and scuttle away.  

A firm hand grips your shoulder, and you find it hard to move. Turning your head slowly, you first look at the hand that holds you down. Thick fingers clutch your joint tightly, and the connected veiny forearm is covered in a smattering of dark chocolate hair. Even under an old woolen sweater, you can see the outline of a sizable bicep. The broad chest breathing heavily under that sweater triggers the onset of hyperventilation until the hand that was holding your shoulder moves away. 

When a warm palm touches your jaw, your eyes threaten to close. But when a thumb brushes your cheek, you finally lock eyes with...an angel? 

You can’t tell if the dimly lit room you are in is fuzzy or if you have a concussion. But if you were a betting person, your money would be on head trauma. Because there was no way he positioned himself in front of a light to have a slight glow about him. Maybe that just works like that? 

Deep cocoa brown curls are about ear-length on his head, but a few unruly strands are hanging above his slightly raised brow. Concerned aquamarine eyes with a touch of brown in the left iris aren’t enough to hide the growing bags under them. A strong nose sits in the center of his face. And a small, yet inviting, mouth is outlined by a dark beard speckled with a few greys here and there. 

“...best you lie back down.” The stranger speaks and you only catch the last bit of it because you were looking at his pretty face. 

“I...,” You start, your hoarse voice causing you to clear your throat, “I’m sorry, what did you say?” 

“I said, it’s probably best you lie back down. You’ve got quite a lump on your head. If I hadn’t found you when I did, who knows what could have happened?” With one hand grabbing for the warm compress, his other hand guides you back down to lay your head on a soft pillow. 

“Found me? Was there a wolf near me? He was huge and he chased after me and then I slipped and hit my head. And where am I? Where are we right now? Who are you? I need to get back to my friend.” Your words exit your mouth hastily as if you are in a rush to get the hell out of...wherever this is. 

“Try and stay calm. Yes, I found you not far from the trail. I didn’t see a wolf anywhere, though,” He pauses quickly, but picks right back up where he left off, “Ehm, my name is Walter. Walter Marshall. We’re in my cabin, just outside of Claw Creek. I didn’t see your friend anywhere but, as soon as this swelling goes down a bit, I can take you into town.” Walter speaks clearly and smoothly, his voice is dark yet pacifying, but it’s obvious that he doesn’t enjoy talking.  

“I guess I should give you my name,” You rattle off your name, and Walter nods, “I’d like to say it’s nice to meet you, Walter. But considering the circumstances of our meeting, this could have gone a lot differently. Not the way I hoped to end the night.” You laugh, mostly to yourself. 

“I should hope not. When I found you, you were still bleeding a bit. I was able to stitch you up and get you cleaned up. But I’d probably go and see a doctor first thing in the morning.” Walter suggests in a strong tone. 

“Thank you, Walter. I hate to think what would’ve happened to me had you not shown up when you did.” Your bottom lip quivers as you think the worst. 

“Hey. You’re stronger than you think. And the swelling has gone down some. Why don’t we get you back to town where you can get more rest?” Walter pats your shoulder and gets up from the chair he was sitting in. 

Your eyes follow him as he moves about the cabin. You realize that you hadn’t looked around before, so focused on him previously. It’s a nice, cozy place. Full of warm, rich colors and various little knickknacks on shelves. It lacks a woman’s touch, so to speak, what with all the antlers and not enough candles to cover the smell of a man. However, it suits the man who lives here. 

Grabbing a set of keys, Walter comes back to where you lay on the couch in the center of the room. He gently and slowly helps you up and off the soft furniture and guides you to his truck parked outside. He helps you into the passenger side, shutting the door when you’re seated, and walks around the front to get in the driver’s side. Turning the key in the ignition, the truck rumbles to life and you are on your way home. 

You’re rubbing your hands together and shoving them into your coat pockets before Walter gets the hint to turn on the heat. It’s only a couple of minutes before it is warm enough to be comfortable.  

The drive down the tree-lined road is mostly silent, save for the low music playing on the radio. Walter points out where he found you and you almost can’t believe you made it that far on foot when you reach the edge of town. But you were drunkenly competitive, so you had your eyes on the prize. 

Once you make it to town, you pass a curfew checkpoint and Walter supplies the officer with a story about how you two lost track of time while out of town. You thank him for the cover and direct him to stop at Olivia’s house to make sure she got home safely. Of course, you told him it was your place, and that Liv was your roommate. 

As handsome as he was, serial killers come in all shapes and sizes and no way were you giving this man your actual address. You’d apologize to Liv later. 

Once he stopped outside of her house, you went to unbuckle yourself and thank Walter for all his help. Protocol for this type of situation eluded you, so when you went for the door handle, you weren’t expecting his voice to stop you. 

“Do me a favor and be careful from now on. No more late-night drinking in the forest. It can be a dangerous place." His calm smile brings out the most adorable dimples and you resist the urge to poke them. 

“I promise. Scout’s honor. No more drunk forest parties. Thank you again for everything.” You place your hand on his arm and squeeze before exiting the truck and waving as you walk up the pathway to Liv’s house. 

The light on the porch turns on and your best friend rushes out and hugs you tightly, bringing you in from the cold as Walter drives off into the night. Once you are in the warmth of her home, she takes your coat and prepares you a cup of tea. She asks who brought you home and you tell her about your ordeal. 

When she asked if he was cute, you shouldn’t have been surprised but you still giggled bashfully. She also playfully swats you when you mention that you didn’t get his number. But that’s fine because at least you have his name.  

Once she deems you safe enough to be on your own, she drives you the few streets over to your home and has you promise to call her in the morning. You take off your boots at the door, remove your coat, and start to sling it over the back of one of your dining room chairs. As you look closer at your coat, you make a note to take it to the cleaners tomorrow. 

You survey the coat for any damage to the fabric and thankfully it just looks a bit dirty. You begin to wipe it with your hand and notice that it’s not all dirt on the coat. You can’t be sure, but if you had to guess what was on the sleeve and collar of the coat, you would say it was dog hair. 

Coarse, short dark-colored hairs that when you hold them under a lamp look to be an inky brown. You try and stop yourself from jumping to conclusions, but it is almost impossible not to do that very thing. If these truly were what you thought they were, that means that you didn’t hallucinate that giant wolf. He was there with you, and he didn’t eat you. 

You decided to get to the bottom of this. You’d schedule a check-up with your doctor in the morning. And after that, you would go back into the woods.  

In search of the wolf? Possibly. In search of the truth? Definitely. 

There was only one place to start. At Walter Marshall’s front door. 

To be continued... 

A/N: Walter is finally in the story!! Yay. I really hope you all enjoyed this chapter.

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[its-time-to-write]

Jamie tartt asking you to go on his brand trip (the one he asked Keeley on in the finale)

Thanks for being my first request! Hope ya like it <3

don’t make this any harder

It is almost the end of the football season, and all AFC Richmond can talk about are their plans once they get a break. You’re excited because it means you get more time with Jamie. You’ve been dating for about four months now, and it’s been weird. Good weird, not bad weird. Sometimes it’s just funny to you that Jamie took one look at you in that coffee shop and decided yep, that’s the one I’m going for. Honestly, you were a little surprised when someone had plunked a cinnamon latte on your small table, and even more surprised to look up and see that someone had some of the most gorgeous eyes you had ever seen. 

I’m Jamie, he had said. What’s your name?

And the rest is history.

This is the first time you feel like you are having fun in a relationship. Jamie has a way of getting you to loosen up and laugh for what feels like the first time in ages. After the first two weeks of dating, he starts to sneak into your flat through the window, so your flatmate won’t hear. A week after that, you go to your first Richmond game, wearing a number 9 with the name Tartt emblazoned across the back. 

Jamie has the idea early on to try to synchronize your lunch breaks, so you start having lunch together almost every day. It’s nice. 

It’s nice to want and to be wanted.

On paper, it looks like you see Jamie a lot, but you really don’t.

“Once football season’s over, we’ll have time, yeah?” he says.

You nod and count the days.

—

The season ends in three days, and you and Jamie are sitting on a bench while he eats whatever weird protein-based meal he has and you sip soup out of a thermos through a straw.

“I’m just saying it’s weird, babe,” Jamie says.

“Oh really, how is it any weirder than insisting on eating any kind of egg with a spoon?” you reply.

“Oi, I told you that in private!”

You both dissolve into laughter and once it fades, Jamie looks strangely pensive. You give him a gentle nudge on his shoulder. “Hey. What’s up?”

Jamie half turns to look at you with that pensive expression. “Eh, it’s nothin. Don’t worry about it.”

You raise your eyebrow at him and Jamie sighs. “Wish you wouldn’t do that, makes me feel insecure about me own lack of eyebrow control.” 

This makes you laugh again, but you’re not about to let him deflect that easily. You reach up with your thumbs to smooth his eyebrows. “C’mon Jamie, out with it. What’s on your mind?”

He’s still looking at you as he starts to speak, thinks better of it, then starts again.

“Babe,” he begins, taking your hand, “do you- I mean, you don’t have to, it’s super lame and like probably bad, so it won’t hurt my feelings if you say no- but do you want to come over for dinner on Saturday? I’ll like cook for ya and you don’t have to bring anything, but I thought it would be nice because now I actually have time to cook and I haven’t in ages, and like I said if you don’t want to, I get it, and-” he probably could have kept rambling on but you stop him.

“Jamie,” you smile, “I would love to! Why did that make you so nervous to ask?”

He shrugs. “I dunno, I guess- I mean, besides Keeley you’re kind of my first real relationship and I don’t want to fuck it up or scare you off.”

Oh. You let that process in your head for a moment as you squeeze his hand.

After a moment you say, “I’m not scared by your egg-eating habits and you’re not scared of my eyebrow muscles, so I think we’re going to be ok.”

Jamie pulls you close to him for a kiss, which is interrupted by an alarm on his phone. You both groan. Time to go back to work.

—

The rest of the week flies by and before you know it, you’re standing in front of Jamie’s door holding a bottle of wine. He said not to bring anything, but it gives you something to do with your hands and Richard has been begging you to let him explain wine for weeks now, so you figured you might as well. The weather is warm, so you’re wearing your favorite linen dress. It’s held together by a single wraparound tie on the side, easy to get on. And off. Odds are good that it will end up in a ball on Jamie’s floor before you have to go home.

You’ve barely knocked before the door swings open to reveal a smiling, nicely dressed Jamie.

“Hi,” you smile back.

He slips his arms around your waist and kisses you before saying, “C’mon in!” 

“You didn’t have to bring anythin,” he continues, holding open the door.

You shrug. “You know how Richard gets.”

Jamie huffs out a laugh and you follow him to the kitchen. You’re not sure what you were expecting, but it certainly was not this. This boy is making his own pizza and has set out the most impressive spread of toppings that you’ve ever seen. It looks and smells amazing.

“Jamie,” you say, still gaping at it all, “where on earth did you learn to do this?”

He looks up from rolling out a flat circle of dough, “Hm? Oh, eh I dunno. I like cooking and I like pizza, and you like pizza, and I’ve been making this recipe since like fuckin’ forever so I thought I’d just stick with an old classic. D’you mind stirring that?” He points to a pot on the stove with a wooden spoon poking out.

You literally have no words as you walk over and peer in.

“Jamie. Did you make this sauce?” you ask incredulously.

Jamie slaps his pizza dough with finality and leans up against the counter next to you, away from the flame.

“Uh yeah, I did,” he replies, scratching his neck. “Don’t overstir.”

You put down the spoon. “Jaim. How am I just now finding out about this. You’re pretty as hell, fantastic at football, and you cook?”

Jamie grins. “You think I’m pretty?”

You roll your eyes. “That’s what you got from this, you nerd?”

His hands have made their way to your waist again.

“Nice dress,” he says as he fiddles with the tie. “Got some good ideas for it later.”

You roll your eyes again, unable to suppress a grin. “Come here,” you say, pulling on his gold chain to get his lips at the right angle.

—

You’re halfway through dinner when Jamie has started to look pensive again. He denies it at first so you leave it, but after three more bites of your pizza he says, “Hey.”

You look up at him expectantly.

“I wasn’t, I mean I’m not- this wasn’t what I wanted to ask you,” he rushes out.

You tilt your head, still waiting.

“You know how we wanted to spend more time together this summer? Well, Nike have a branding thing for me in Brazil.”

You set down your slice and let out a soft “oh.”

“Yeah.” Jamie says. “So what d’you think?” Now he’s looking at you expectantly, and a little hesitant. You understand his nervousness now because you’re feeling it too. Four months is not a very long time to be together, and Brazil is a beautiful place with beautiful people. You can do a lot in Brazil.

You study your wine glass. “How long will you be gone?”

“Well, the shoot’s not that long, but I’ll probably be there a month. Nike’s paying for the whole thing, hotel, some of the meals, whatever. Flight’s next week. It’s mad.”

You nod. Jamie’s still looking at you.

Your mouth has gone dry. You’ll handle this with grace and at least you’ll go out on a good note with the best meal you’ve ever had. 

You’re still looking intently at the wine glass but you rip your eyes away and force yourself to look at Jamie.

“That’s great Jaim- Jamie. I’m happy for you. This is a big deal, and I’m sure you’ll love Brazil.”

Jamie’s face transforms into a look of relief as you speak.

“That’s great, yeah, I mean, I didn’t know what you’d think because obviously we talked about being together this summer and y’know, people say one thing but mean another, so I wasn’t sure, but that’s great!”

This boy and nervous rambling. He could give Ted a run for his money.

You force a smile, eyes on your plate now. You feel like all your energy has been drained from you in one fell swoop, while across from you Jamie is smiling like he won the lottery.

Is he really that excited to break things off with you?

He’s talking again so you do your best to focus on what he’s saying. 

“-And I was thinking we could go to this beach Keeley was telling me about and obviously we have to try all the food because granddad won’t be around to fuckin boss me around-”

What?

“Jamie,” you interrupt, “what?”

Jamie looks at you, confused. “What?”

“What are you talking about?”

Jamie looks at you like you’re mental. “I’m talkin’ about Brazil? The trip we’re goin’ on next week?”

Things are starting to click into place. You reach across the table and put your hand on top of his to steady yourself.

“You’re taking me on your brand deal?”

Now Jamie is really looking at you like you’ve gone mad. “That’s what I just asked ya. What are you on about?”

You stare at him for a moment then slowly say. “I thought you were breaking up with me so you could sleep with hot people in Brazil.”

Jamie stares back incredulously. “Why the fuck would you think that?”

You throw your hands in the air. “You were so nervous to talk to me! You said you were going to Brazil! That’s what people do! They get nervous to break up so they use some big trip to make it seem easier! And you’re you and you’re young, hot, and famous, so why would you be dragging me around with you?”

“You think I’m hot?”

You’re going to throttle him. “You know I think you’re hot, I’ve let you see me naked. Can we please stay on topic?”

Jamie chuckles at that.

“Look, I was nervous ‘cause you’re like, really fit. But it’s like, you’re also fit mentally? And I don’t get a lot of girls like that who also like me back. And Nike’s only paying for one room so… there’s that.”

He’s blushing a lot for someone who has been caught hopping out of your window at 3am.

Your head is in your hands now. Jamie gets up from his seat and pulls you up from your chair into his arms.

“Babe,” he says into your hair, “will you come to Brazil with me for a month while we fuck around like the hot couple that we are?”

You nod into his chest then lift your head to look at his face. He’s smiling at you. “I’m a dumbass,” you say.

His smile grows as he strokes your cheek.

“Yeah, but you’re my dumbass,” he says as he reaches for that tie on the side of your dress.

[lunarbuck]

DBF!Ari Levinson + beach day

alice you're gonna kill me lmao

pairing: DBF!Ari x f!reader (any race)

wc: 1.5k

beta'd by @late-to-the-party-81 <3 <3 <3

sneak peek: “You see something you like, princess?” You nod, practically in a trance. Ari steps toward you, tilting his head down to whisper into your ear. “Then take it.”

warnings: age gap, fluffly flirting, dbf, edging/orgasm delay/denial, oral (m receiving), smut (p in v), pet names [daddy, princess, baby]

my masterlist | 1.5k sleepover

The sand is warm beneath your toes as you settle onto your towel, letting the sun soak into your skin. It’s early enough in the season that the beach isn’t incredibly busy, so you just had to take advantage. 

As you close your eyes and let the summer heat warm you, you feel fingers brushing against your arm. Calloused but gentle, the fingers draw up your arm, tickling your neck, and find their way to cup your jaw.

“Princess,” Ari practically groans, shifting to block the sun from your face. “You’re killing me.” You grin, keeping your eyes closed. 

“And what’re you gonna do about it?” You taunt, tugging your bottom lip between your teeth in the way you know drives Ari crazy. “ Daddy .” You draw the word out and peek an eye open just in time to see Ari’s pupils blow wide. 

Ari shifts closer, sidling himself right next to you. Your mouth waters as his broad chest brushes against your shoulder, as his hand slides from your face and down your neck. His fingers trace over the edge of your swimsuit. You’d chosen it specifically to tease him, knowing it’s too small to fully cover your breasts.

You hum lightly in pleasure as Ari runs his strong hands over your body, and for a moment, you worry about the possibility of someone seeing you. The beach isn’t too busy today, but the possibility of someone walking past and seeing the way Ari is touching you, the way you’re reacting to his touch, makes you shiver.  

“You think you can tease me and not have any consequences for that?” Ari asks, dipping his head to kiss the sensitive spot on your neck. 

You shrug, keeping up your air of indifference. “You’re gonna pay for that, princess. But not right now. Right now, I want to enjoy the weather with my gorgeous girl” Suddenly, Ari’s arms sweep under you, and he swiftly picks you up. You giggle into Ari’s chest, holding onto him as he carries you toward the water. 

Ari walks into the surf until the crystal blue waters come up to his waist. He settles into it, letting you adjust to the temperature and as you do, you wrap your arms around his neck, letting your fingers play with the ends of his hair.

“I’m glad you got the day off,” you tell him as he shifts your position, wrapping your legs around his hips.

“Me too, princess. Your dad might be getting a little suspicious, though.” You sigh at the mention of your father. Ari and your dad have worked together for years now. You hadn’t meant to fall for your dad’s friend, but you don’t regret it one bit. One day, you’ll tell your dad, but you don’t want to think about it right now.

“We’ll tell him soon,” you say, pressing a kiss to Ari’s firm chest. “But let’s just be here. Let’s just enjoy today.” Ari gazes down with you, blue eyes shining like the water, and smiles.

You and Ari swim around, talking and laughing, carefree in a way the two of you often aren’t able to experience. Once your fingers get pruney and the sun starts to set, Ari picks you up and carries you back onto the beach. 

After gathering your things, you and Ari wander back to the hotel. He’d surprised you by booking it for the weekend and you were so grateful because it means no sneaking around, no hiding; just an entire weekend of you and Ari.

When you’re back in the hotel room, you bask in the chill of the air conditioning before wandering into the bathroom and turning on the shower. You slip out of your bathing suit, leaving it on the counter, and step under the spray.

You start your routine using your favorite shampoo to rinse the salt from your hair. As you engross yourself in the routine, you hear the bathroom door click open. Ari wanders in through the steam, leaning against the counter. You watch as he picks up your bikini bottoms and twirls them around his finger. 

“This bikini is gonna be the death of me, princess,” he says, voice low and gravelly. “You looked so sexy in it.” You smile to yourself as you rinse the shampoo from your hair. Ari slides the shower door open and steps under the water with you.

“Ari,” you whisper, drinking in the sight of his gorgeous body. Your eyes drift down his muscular chest, his abs, his adonis belt. When your eyes land on his hard cock, you go weak in the knees.

“You see something you like, princess?” You nod, practically in a trance. Ari steps toward you, tilting his head down to whisper into your ear. “Then take it.” You sink down to your knees, letting your eyes flick up to Ari’s face. He grins and cups your face with his big hands as you lick a drop of precum from his tip. He tastes salty and sweet, and you bite back a moan.

Before Ari, you’d never really enjoyed giving head, but Ari changes everything. How reactive he is, how much pleasure he gives you as you pleasure him. It’s amazing. You take him into your mouth, sucking him as deeply as you can, and Ari’s hands shift to your head. He doesn’t push, just guides you as your mouth moves over his dick.

“So good, baby,” he tells you through gritted teeth. “So fucking good.” You glow under his praise and squeeze your thighs together. Pleasure shoots through you and builds in your belly. You lose yourself as you take Ari deeper and deeper, loving his taste on your tongue. 

Ari suddenly pulls away, and you watch him for his next move. He helps you stand and pins you to the cool tiles. He lets his eyes travel over your body, and you feel heat settle in your belly.

“See something you like?” You ask, tossing his words back at him.

“I do,” he replies, running his hands up your torso to your breasts. He runs his fingers over your nipples, toying with them. “And I’m gonna take it.” 

Ari dives in and kisses you, stealing your breath away. Your knees wobble beneath you, and he picks you up, wrapping your legs around him. Your pussy grinds against his cock, and you moan into his mouth. You wiggle your hips, aching for him to fuck you, to drive himself deep inside of you.

“Please, Ari, please,” you whisper, building your pleasure higher and higher as you grind against him. 

“Tell me what you want, princess,” he says, sucking a mark into your neck. 

“Ari, I want you to fuck me, please,” you beg, picking up the pace of your hips. Your orgasm builds and builds. “I need it so bad, Ari.”

“Yeah?” he asks, gently biting your shoulder. “You want me to fuck you?” You nod, already a whimpering mess in his arms.

Ari snakes a hand between you and finds your clit with his fingers. He rubs circles in the way he knows you love, and it nearly sends you over the edge. The moment you’re about to come apart, he stops. He holds your hips still, and you groan as the orgasm fades.

“Ari,” you whine, trying to writhe against him, but he holds you still.

“Hm, princess, you shouldn’t have talked back to me earlier,” he says, running his thumb back over your clit. You jolt, sensitivity setting in. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Ari,” you tell him, hoping he’ll take mercy on you.

“Actions have consequences, baby.” He grinds his hips against yours, resuming his ministrations on your clit.

Ari works you up to orgasm after orgasm before ripping each of them away, not letting you come, over and over again. He shuts off the water and carries you to the bed, not caring that both of you are still dripping wet. You shake in his arms, a puddle in his hands. When he’s finally decided that you’ve had enough, you have tears pricking your eyes.

“You did so good for me, princess,” he whispers, kissing you gently. “So good.” Ari shifts your hips and lines his cock up.

“Please, Ari, please, I need you so bad.” Ari kisses you and finally presses inside of your aching pussy, making you see stars. He stretches you so much it almost hurts, but he soothes the pain with his lips on your cheek. 

His pace is gentle but deep, hitting the spot inside you that makes your body shake. He worships your body, wringing pleasure from you. He whispers words of praise to you, making your body sing.

“You’re so fucking perfect, baby,” he tells you as an orgasm builds deep inside you. “My perfect princess.” 

When you come, your whole body tightens, and your vision blacks out. Ari fucks you through it, kissing you senseless. With a few more flexes of his hips, he follows you over the edge and sinks to the bed beside you. As you come down from the high, Ari pulls you into his side, holding you close and pressing kisses to your temple.

In moments like this, your love of Ari seems to flow from you. In every touch, in every whispered word.

“I love you, princess,” he whispers into your hair.

“I love you too, Ari.”

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[kaminocasey]

We Were Golden Part 5

Summary: You get to Cut and Suu's. Tension between you and Hunter starts to rise.

Pairing: Ex!Crosshair x Reader / (Eventual?) Hunter x Reader

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI; Smut in a dream (oral f receiving), angst

WC: 4.2K

A/N: Wow, it's been a hot minute since I've updated and I'm so sorry. That season 3 trailer really put my ass in gear, huh? Lol.

We Were Golden Masterlist │ TAGLIST FORM

(pictures from Pinterest)

“Fuck, you’re so pretty…” Crosshair groans softly in your ear as he teases your clit with his slender fingers, with you pushed up against the fresher sink.

Letting out a soft whimper, you catch his lips in a passionate kiss, needing more of him. 

You and Crosshair have been together for three months and within those three months, there hadn’t been a day that the two of you hadn’t found yourselves like this in the fresher, locked away, enjoying each other. In the midst of war and battles, all you could do was cling to these little moments. 

He drops to his knees, latching his perfect lips to your cunt, determined to make you cum harder than the night before and the night before that and so on. 

“Cross-” You gasp, gripping his silver hair tightly, desperately.

“That’s it, Princess.” He praises you, slipping a long, slender finger into you. “Want you to cum on my face just like this.” 

You wake up with tears in your eyes, sitting up to wipe them with your sleeve. When you look up, you find Hunter sitting in his bunk across from yours, watching you. The look on his face is of concern but he’s clearly trying to give you space. 

“You… okay?” He asks you, but you shrug with a sniffle. “You wanna talk about it?”

You shake your head. “Not really.” 

What was there to say? 

You left Crosshair back on Kamino… you’re a terrible partner… how could you live with yourself? He would’ve never done that to you. Right?

“It’s not your fault, you know.” Hunter murmurs across to you, softly. 

He’s always been able to read your mind and usually, it’s endearing. But right now, you’re still slightly resentful of him, even though you really don’t want to be.

“No, I suppose not…” You stare at him.

But he reads your mind again. Your eyes still say It’s yours. Even though you don’t really believe that. 

“I know…” He nods. “I’m sorry…” 

“I know you are.” You sigh. “It’s just… hard.” 

He puts his feet down on the ground and leans forward to you, his forearms resting on his thighs.

“We’re going to get him back, okay? I just had to get the kid out of there.” Hunter murmurs, glancing down the hall at Omega, who’s asleep against Gonky. 

“I get it…” You sit up, your legs resting against his as you lean on your forearms as well. “I really do…”

The two of you are closer now, looking at each other. It’s almost comforting, after sleeping in the empty bunk, missing Crosshair’s presence. But then, you’re hit with the memory that he shot at his own brothers… tried to stop you from getting to safety. This new him… what if it’s permanent?

“I just…” You look down at your hands, clasping them together. “I miss him… and it’s weird… because that person we left behind… was not Crosshair. And I keep thinking… what if we can’t get him back to normal?” 

“We’ll figure it out if it comes to that.” He pats your hand and you place your other hand over his, nodding. “I think Crosshair was sort of right… Maybe I’ve been making bad calls-”

“Stop.” You squeeze his hand, catching his eye so that he looks at you. “You’re doing what you think is best for this squad. I told you a long time ago that I would follow you to the ends of the galaxy, Hunter. You’re a good leader. A great one. And there’s no one else I’d rather follow.”

You don’t miss the way he glances at your lips, but you choose to ignore it. 

“Would you really follow me to the ends of the galaxy?” He smiles, softly.

You roll your eyes, smirking, bumping your knee against his. “You know I would.” 

You hear Echo clearing his throat in the doorway and as you look up at him, you and Hunter separate as if you’ve been caught in some compromising position. 

“What is it?” Hunter asks, standing up. 

“Should I move the kid?” He looks down at Omega behind him. 

“I’ve got her.” Hunter steps over Wrecker’s leg and scoops her up, carrying her to his bunk and laying her down gently.

You ignore the tug in your chest at the gentle action and lean against the wall, crossing your arms.

Hunter steps back into the doorway, looking down at her, chuckling. “It’s a first, isn’t it?” 

“Inspecting every corner of the ship finally tired her out.” Echo smirks. 

“Yeah, she’s curious. I’ll give her that.” Hunter glances at you again.

“Hunter, she’s a child. What are we going to do with her?” Echo whispers with a sigh.

You’d all been through a lot over the last 24 hours, but you can’t help the attachment you’ve already formed with Omega. She deserves better than what she was given on Kamino. You could all give her that… But also, you know that this life that you and the Batch have is incredibly dangerous for a child. Obviously, she needs someone and she’s very clearly already attached to you guys as well. Especially Hunter. 

Hunter looks to you as if you could have all the answers but you just give him an encouraging smile, knowing he’ll make the right decision.

“We are coming up on Saleucami.” Tech announces.

Hunter joins Tech up in the cockpit, leaving you and Echo in the bunk room doorway. Echo gives you a strange look and you raise your eyebrows.

“What?” You ask.

He shrugs, glancing at Hunter, knowing Hunter can hear. You’re sure he’ll bring it up later when you land. 

“You wanna wake her up or you want me to?” Echo asks. 

“I’ve got her.” You start toward Omega but she’s already sitting up, rubbing her eyes.

“Are we there already?” She asks and you can’t help but smile.

“Yeah we are.” You reply.

She immediately bounces up, ready at the hatch, but Hunter pulls her back.

“Whenever we land, I go first, so I can make sure it’s safe, alright?” He asks her, softly.

She nods up at him, her eyes already filled with wonder, as Tech lands the Marauder. Hunter still hasn’t told you who’s on Saleucami that they know, so you’re a little anxious, even though you trust him fully. 

Hunter hits the hatch button and it comes down, the steps ascending with it. He walks down the hatch first with Echo behind him, and then Tech, Wrecker, and you. Omega is the last to exit the ship and when you turn around to tell her to follow close with you, you find her shielding her eyes from the sunlight, clearly having never been used to such light before on Kamino. When she gets used to the light, you watch the wonder fill her eyes once again and your chest tightens.

“Huh? What’s with her?” Wrecker asks, confused.

All of the guys turn to look and watch Omega inhale the fresh air and then step on dirt for the very first time. You just can’t help but smile as she kneels down to the ground to sift it through her fingers. 

“Woah.” Omega looks at it falling from her hand, with wonder. “What is this?”

“That would be dirt.” Tech speaks up and you grin. 

You’ve wondered a few times what it would be like to have kids. Though, you were never fully sure if you wanted them. But looking at Omega experiencing things for the first time, brings you to a realization that maybe one day… it wouldn’t be so bad. 

You and Crosshair had talked about your futures many times, but never about children. Would he ever want them? 

What about Hunter? 

Wow. Where did that come from? You shake your head slightly, trying to clear your head as you look around you. 

Omega lets out a soft gasp. “It’s amazing.”

When she stands up, she giggles and kicks it around a little bit, sending it up into the air around her. You and Hunter smile at each other before looking back down at her as she joins the group. 

You notice Hunter quickly glance up at the sky when some thunder rumbles. 

“Come on. Let’s get moving.” He nods toward some fields. 

As you start walking through the fields, you keep a safe eye on Omega as she finds wonder in every stalk and plant and insect. Her curiosity is a breath of fresh air, honestly. 

When you glance forward, you find Hunter’s eyes on you and you go warm in the face and look up at the sky. Things were so easy a couple days ago. Now everything is so turned around and different. You’re supposed to be able to handle the biggest changes. To adapt. To survive. 

You hear Echo call your name and tell you to watch out. But due to your mind being elsewhere, you don’t comprehend what he’s saying in time and step into an unfortunately deep mud puddle.

“Karking hell…” You groan as you find yourself waist deep in the puddle, which just turns out to actually be a hole in the ground.

Echo and Wrecker immediately burst into laughter. You start to throw an obscene gesture at them but then remember the kid and just settle for a glare instead. With a grumble, you reach for your pack and toss it to Hunter who sets it to the side and starts to reach for your hand. You ignore it and instead crawl your way out. Wrecker ignores your protests and helps you to stand. 

Tech scans you with his data pad. “Nothing seems to be hurt or bruised.”

“Just her ego.” Echo teases.

That time you do throw up your finger, walking ahead of the group, despite not being entirely sure where you’re going. You can practically feel Hunter’s gaze on you now. 

“Anyway, this friend of yours, what’s he doing all the way out here?” Echo asks.

“Hiding. That’s what deserters do.” Tech informs him.

A deserter? 

“Staying off the radar’s not our specialty, but he’s been doing it for years.” Hunter speaks up.

“And you trust a deserter?” Echo seems unsure.

He’s always been a loyal soldier to the Republic. Of course he’d be wary of a deserter. But before you can point out that you’re all technically deserters now, Tech speaks up.

“Why not? We’re all deserters now.” Tech says what’s on your mind and you nod in agreement. 

Hunter speeds up a little bit in front of you, putting up his fist for you all to stop, just as you’re about to point out the trip wire. He even stops Omega as she was about to keep walking. 

“What are we looking at?” Omega looks up at him.

“A booby trap.” Hunter informs her, but Wrecker steps over it.

“Single trip wire.” He chuckles. “That’s cute.”

Just as he says that, he triggers a second trap sending a circle of battle droids pointing guns at Wrecker flying up around him. You quickly pull Omega behind you, like it’s already a reflex to protect her.

“WOAH!” Wrecker lets out a yell and quickly pulls his blaster off his back and shoots down the droids. 

“Easy, Wrecker!” Hunter shouts, trying to get the giant to settle down just as you realize the droids aren’t active.

Thank the Maker. 

“W-was that me?” He asks, confused.

Before anyone can say anything else, you all hear a female voice and then turn to look toward it. 

“What do we have here? More clones who have lost their way.” A pink Twi’lek woman and a man with her are pointing a rifle at your group. 

“It’s been a while fellas.” The man puts his gun down.

You quickly realize the man is a clone and you look to Hunter for some sort of an explanation. How do they know these two people?

“You look like you could use a shower.” The woman smiles at you, eyeing the dried mud.

“Yeah, you got a hole in your field out that way.” You tell them, back behind you.

“Sorry about that, I’ve been meaning to fill it in.” The man tells you as you start walking toward their house. 

When they let you inside, the guys all gather around the table and Hunter starts to introduce you while Omega starts to check everything out. You don’t blame her one bit. This small house has to be intriguing to someone who’s spent their entire life in a Kaminoan facility. This place, which is full of life and warmth, is basically the complete opposite of Kamino. 

“I see a few new faces.” The woman says after getting everyone a drink.

Hunter introduces you, Echo, and Omega and then the two hosts as Cut and Suu. Omega waves up at Suu, politely, and Suu waves back. 

“Pleased to meet you.” She tells you all.

“Ma’am.” Echo nods, politely, and you can’t help but smile. 

When you met Echo back in the 501st, he was quite smooth with the ladies. Since his incident, he’s been more refined and not as outgoing. It was also really hard on him when he learned about his twin, Fives, who was basically joined at his hip. They did everything together. And that included going out and finding women together. They were something, that’s for sure.

Cut looks up suddenly. “Where’s Crosshair?”

The guys all look at you and you get a soft pang in your chest. You and Hunter make eye contact for the first time since before you fell in that mud hole and he sighs. 

“It’s complicated.” Hunter tells Cut, pulling his gaze away from you. 

“Sounds familiar.” Cut smiles, obviously noticing the look between you and Hunter. “Rex told us about the clone troopers turning against the Jedi.” 

Rex?

“You talked to Rex? When?” Echo asks, more eagerly.

Your brain goes back to the 501st. You could never imagine them killing Anakin Skywalker nor his former padawan Ahsoka Tano. Last you’d heard some of the 501st branched off to help her and a group of Mandalorians. You know that yours and Echo’s brains must be on the same wavelength because you both share a look of concern. 

Rex would never hurt either of them. Right?

“Well, he passed through yesterday.” Cut tells Echo.

“Where’d he go?” Echo asks.

“Didn’t ask.” Cut shrugs. “He was going on about some behavioral implant.”

Omega joins the table, next to Hunter. “He must mean the inhibitor chip.”

“The what?” Hunter asks her.

“Inhibitor chips. The Kaminoans implanted them in the clones to modify their behavior.” She tells him. 

You look at all of the guys, confused. Inhibitor chips. So that means if that’s what’s making Crosshair act this way, it can be removed… right?

“Tech, you said the regs were programmed but you never mentioned a chip.” Hunter looks over at Tech.

“How else did you think it worked?” Tech looks up from his data pad.

Suddenly, the front door bursts open and two small children come running in. 

“Mom! Dad!” They yell. “There’s a ship outside!” 

“Shaeeah, Jek!” Wrecker yells, excitedly. “Remember me?”

They both yell “Uncle Wrecker!” as Wrecker scoops them up in a hug. It warms your heart how good Wrecker is with kids. You suppose it’s probably got something to do with the fact that he can be like a big kid himself sometimes. But the fact that they’re calling him “uncle Wrecker” means that they all know these people well. 

The girl, Shaeeah, turns toward Omega. “Who are you?”

Omega suddenly gets shy, peering out from behind Hunter’s chair. 

“Omega.” She tells them. 

“We never see kids around here.” Shaeeah informs her, grabbing her hand. “Come with us.”

The kids start ushering Omega toward the door and Omega looks back at Hunter, as if for reassurance that it’s alright. Hunter gives her the softest smile and a nod to let her know that it’s okay. With that, they drag Omega out to go play and Suu turns toward you.

“I suppose you would like that shower now.” She smiles.

“That would be great.” You smile, gratefully, taking your pack with you.

She grabs you an extra pair of clothes that she said she’d had lying around for a long time and didn’t need anymore and you thank her again as she shows you to the fresher. 

You shred your muddy clothing and hop in the shower, immediately appreciating the warm water. You let it run over your body for a moment before starting to scrub. 

Once the grime is off of you and your hair is clean, you feel instantly better. You get out of the shower, wrapping the towel around you. You put your shampoo and body wash back into your pack kit and pull out your brush, wiping the fog on the mirror down with the towel and then hanging it over the bar on the wall. 

You turn around and look in the mirror, seeing yourself for the first time since throwing up in the fresher back in the barracks on Kamino. You feel like you look different. Maybe it's because you aren’t necessarily who you were the other day anymore. So much has happened in such a small time frame, that would surely change anyone. 

You put the clothes that Suu gave you on, and notice it feels a bit snug. She’s obviously a bit smaller than you. Whatever. If you get uncomfortable, you’ll just borrow from one of the guys. 

As you walk out of the fresher, you see Hunter and Cut by the door. Hunter is in civilian clothing that Cut must have given him. You both just stand there and stare at each other because wow, he looks good with his arms showing. It’s not a sight that many get to see all that often due to the black bodysuits that GAR keep the clones in underneath their armor, and also because of said armor. 

Hunter’s eyes sweep down your body, taking in your form and he has to physically tear his eyes away from you by looking at Cut, who’s of course giving him a knowing look.

“We’re uh… heading into town. To book Cut, Suu, and the kids a shuttle offworld.” He tells you.

You nod. “Alright. Be safe.” 

He smiles, softly. “We will.” 

When they leave, you notice Suu’s eyes on you.

“Uh hi.” You clear your throat, sticking your pack with the rest of the Batch’s. 

“Are you two-?” She smirks as she takes your clothes and throws them in a washer tub.

“Ha. No, absolutely not.” You wave her off and go sit on the couch. 

She joins you on the couch, resting her arm on the back of it, grinning at you. “But you want to.” 

You shake your head, glancing over at the guys who aren’t even paying attention to you. Echo’s keeping an eye on Omega in the doorway. Tech’s nose is buried in his data pad and Wrecker is passed out in the recliner, mouth gaping open and snoring. 

“No. It’s not like that.” You shake your head. “I’m with or… was with… Crosshair.” 

“Oh…” She murmurs. “I apologize. I just saw the way that you two…”

You shrug your shoulders. “Hunter’s my best friend. We look out for each other.” 

“And what happened to Crosshair?” She asks.

That pang in your chest is starting to become familiar and you really don’t care much for it. You realize though that she’s probably asking because she knows him and is genuinely curious. 

“He chose this new… “Empire”. Or I suppose the inhibitor chip did…” You murmur, looking at the rug on the floor. 

“And you still love him.”

“Of course.” 

There’s no question. He may have broken up with you, but you’re still always going to love him. 

“But you have feelings for Hunter.”

It’s not a question that she’s asking. She’s telling you she sees right through your shit. But she’s not being rude about it. You don’t know what to say because what you and Hunter have is something too complicated, yet also easy. 

Complicated for others, easy to the two of you.

You’re sitting in the barracks by the window, watching the ocean rage on angrily, your knees drawn up and your chin resting on them. As always, you’ve never once seen a calm Kaminoan Sea.

You hear the doors slide open and shut and you assume it’s Crosshair come to apologize about your fight you had. Which have been becoming more frequent. And desperate to follow Hunter’s rules about it not affecting the group, you went out for some alone time on the Marauder and Crosshair got offended. 

Which is not only stupid, but also hypocritical because the man loves his alone time, which you’d pointed out and it only escalated things, making him storm out of the Marauder. 

“Hey.” Hunter’s voice is suddenly next to you as he sits in the window with you, but leaning his back on the window.

“Hey.” You look at him.

“Crosshair mentioned you’d had an… argument?” He raises an eyebrow.

You shrug.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He offers.

“What, are you trying to be my therapist?” You quip. 

He chuckles. “Just a friend.”

And that’s what Hunter became. Your best friend. 

After a while, Hunter and Cut finally return and Echo nods for Hunter to follow him outside. Which seems strange to you. Normally Echo isn’t usually shy about saying what’s on his mind in front of people. 

Unfortunately, your curiosity quickly gets the best of you and you decide to follow them once you think they’re far enough away. You watch as they head into the barn and quietly make your way that way so you can at least hear what they’re talking about. Being out of the know doesn’t sit well with you, that’s how you justify it being alright that you’re about to eavesdrop.

“I heard her talking to Suu… even Suu could practically see right through the two of you.” Echo tells Hunter as you lean up against the hale bay by the barn doors.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Look… I’m not saying don’t pursue her… But… give her time to get over Crosshair. We can’t afford any fuck ups right now. If you’re both not focusing-”

Hunter sighs and you can already tell he’s rubbing his hands down his face in exasperation. “I am giving her time, Echo. I’m giving her space. Hell, I’d even give her the entire galaxy if she asked for it. Since when are you so nosy?”

Your chest tightens at Hunter’s serious tone when he says that last part. 

“Since I heard the hurt in her voice, and saw it in her eyes when they brought up Crosshair.” 

Hunter’s apparently not the only one who can read you like a book. But Echo’s right. You need time. It’s not like you can just move on from Crosshair in a day. You spent every single day together for a year.  

“You think I didn’t?” Hunter snips.

Deciding you can’t handle anymore talk about Crosshair, you start to head back to the house but end up tripping over a smaller hale bay, cursing automatically as you fall to the ground. You try to yank yourself up quickly, but are met with two confused clones, staring down at you.

“Uh, hey. Looking for Omega.” You cough. 

Echo snorts and holds out his hand to help you up. “Right.”

You take his hand and Hunter rights you, holding a hand on your shoulder.

“You two should talk.” Echo lets go of your hand and shoots Hunter a look and walks off.

Hunter guides you down to the hay bale, sitting on it next to you, watching Omega as she plays with Shaeeah and Jek. You sit like that in comfortable silence for a little bit. And for a moment, it feels normal again.

“Echo’s right. We should talk.” Hunter murmurs.

“I hate when he’s right.” You sigh. 

He lets out a chuckle and then looks at you. His eyes briefly fall to your lips before settling on your eyes. 

After a moment, he gets back up and starts to pace a little bit. It’s clear that he’s anxious about whatever conversation has to be had between the two of you. He finally stops to look down at you and then looks at the barn and goes into it, knowing you’ll follow him. Because that’s what you and Hunter do, apparently. 

You could ask for the galaxy and he would give it to you, and you would follow him to the ends of it. 

What does that mean?

He turns to look at you, leaning forward on the table. You stand across from him, crossing your arms. 

“Just talk to me, Hunter.” You murmur, softly. “Please…” 

He opens his mouth to speak but Tech’s voice falls over Hunter’s comm requesting both of your presences back at the house. Hunter lets out an annoyed grunt.

“On our way.” Hunter pulls the comm up and talks into it, never breaking eye contact with you.

Whatever the conversation was, it’ll have to be put on hold for now. Which, judging from the way that Hunter’s looking at you, is probably for the best.

TAGS: @rebel-finn @rexandechosandwich @madameminor @dumfanting @corona-one @tecker @ladykatakuri @brynhildrmimi @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @zoeykallus @maulslittlemeowmeow @littlemousedroid @arctrooper69 @rexxdjarin @padawancat97 @hated-by-me @sleepingsun501 @idledreams @redheadgirl @themcuwriter @ashotofspotchka @sunshinesdaydream @crosshairsimp73 @ariadnes-red-thread @rosmariner @heyitsaloy @starstofillmydream @high-ct5555 @echos-girlfriend @sleepywych @nekotaetae @justanothersadperson93 @aconstructofamind @book-of-baba-fett @chopper-base @palliateclaw @501st-rexster @dead-poolz @nahoney22 @where-is-my-mind-tho @jediknightjana @erishimoon @witching3 @queen-of-many-fandoms @wizardofrozz  @burningfieldof-clover @rebelsriley 

[lanitalay]

Supernatural

Azriel Supernatural AU x reader

Summary: In which you encounter a couple of hunters during a case. 

A/N: I've been rewatching supernatural and i just love it. This is based on the early seasons. Hopefully the ACOTAR and Supernatural fandoms overlap.

Warnings: mentions of blood and death, nothing descriptive.

wordcount: 1.7k

Masterlist

“It’s totally vampires, Az. Remember that nest we took out in Idaho? They did the same thing with their victims.” Azriel bites his lip recalling that hunt, it was in the top ten worst moments of his life. “I know you’re right but those things give me the creeps. The way their fangs just-” he gags thinking about the extra set of teeth. 

“You big baby, it's just teeth. What gets me is the decapitation. Ghosts are easy. Salt. Fire. But these suckers are a nasty job.” You look over your notes before asking “do you think Cass and Rhys could give us a hand? I think we’ll be outnumbered.” 

He shakes his head “we could call but last time we talked they were up to their necks on a vengeful spirit case. Get this, the bones are scattered in different places because the deceased couldn’t decide where to be buried.” You chuckle. “Those two always get caught up in something like that. What about Mor? Or Amren? I’ll call them just in case.” 

Two phone calls later and no back up to show for it. “That was a bust.” Azriel nudges your arm. “Hey, we can do this. We can figure out a way to take them out one at a time.” You sigh and lean your head against the window. Watching as endless fields blur into one another. “You’re right, wake me up when we get there will you?” Before he can say yes you’ve dozed off. 

The road to Texas was long and lonely for Azriel. You slept the whole way and he was forced to keep himself company with mindless humming and singing lyrics from songs he probably misremembers. You’re usually the dj, but he knows if he messes with your tapes he’s in deep shit. You arrive at the usual dingy motel at around midnight. 

“Hey, sleepy head, we’re here.” Az is careful not to startle you, slightly shaking your arm with a scarred hand to rouse you from sleep without setting off your hunter instincts. “I’m awake.” You mumble but don’t move to get out of the truck. “I’ll go get us a room, while you wake up.” A hum is the only response he gets. 

When he returns he sees you unloading the truck with a pep in your step. “We’re in 9.” Once you’ve settled in, it dawns on you that you took a six hour nap on the ride here. There’s no way you’ll be able to fall asleep now. “Az, you want something to eat?” He yawns “no thanks, I’m going to turn in for the night.” 

“Well I’m not tired. I’ll grab a bite at that bar across the street and come back.” You put on your jacket and make the short walk to the hole in the wall establishment that always seems to accompany the motels you frequent. “One beer and a burger, please.” It 's quiet. You assume that it’s because it’s Tuesday. Until you overhear the conversation from two guys at the bar. “Six people went missing and all of them were last seen here, Sammy, something’s up.” 

“I know, Dean, but we’ve been here a week and no one can point us in the right direction. Maybe they left.” Hunters, and by the sounds of it, they are on the same case.  The bartender sets a pint in front of you, when it’s in your hand you walk over. “Are you two looking for a vampire nest?” They seem to have a language of their own, exchanging a few glances before the one with blondish hair says “depends, who’s asking?”

“Y/n, my partner and I just got into town after hearing about six disappearances. Looks like you two got a head start.” You sit with them in a shadowy corner of the bar as they tell you about the roadblocks they’ve encountered. “Most of them came here without telling anybody they knew, they weren’t regulars.” The taller one with brown hair finishes. 

“So they were lured.” They nod. “It’s been quiet since we got here.” You finish the burger and wipe your fingers with the thinnest napkin you’ve ever seen. “They got six people in two weeks, that’s enough blood to keep a nest alive for a month.” But something’s off and you can tell they feel it too. “What were your names again?” 

“I’m Sam.” “I’m Dean.” No way.

 “Winchester?” They nod. 

“That’s crazy! I knew your father! It’s sort of how I got started in all of this actually-” you stop yourself, John is dead now and these were his sons “I’m sorry for your loss, he helped a lot of people.” Az is going to freak when you tell him. Dean swigs his beer and says “yeah well, that’s what happens when you make deals with devils.” 

It’s tense for a bit while you finish your beer “well, if you don’t mind it, my partner and I could help on the case. Four machetes are better than two. We’re staying right across the street. Room 9. See ya, boys.” 

The next morning you tell Azriel about your encounter. “I’m telling you Az, they seem nice enough. If we team up it will be safer.” He’s unsure, always wary of strangers. “I don’t know, y/n-” just then, a knock at the door. You check the peephole before opening it. “Hi guys, this is my partner Azriel. Az, this is Sam and that's Dean.” The brothers brought coffee, by the looks of it it’s from the prehistoric machine in the lobby. “We talked about it and we agreed, working together will speed things along.” 

“Az?” He sighs. “Fine.” 

“He’s chipper,” Dean quips. “He’s not a morning person,” you quickly defend. You were the only one allowed to comment on his crankiness. 

After a day of following dead ends, you sit with Dean at the same bar. Sam and Az are still trying to find something in the archives. “So what’s the deal with you and your partner?” 

“Why? Are you interested?” He chuckles. “Just curious, your room had two beds. Are you two not involved?” Maybe it was the whisky, but you said “not romantically.” 

“So he won’t be upset if I buy you another drink with the intention of getting in your pants?” You roll your eyes. “Your reputation precedes you, Winchester.” 

“My reputation as a hunter or a ladies’ man?”

“Your reputation as a shameless flirt.” He leans closer to you “is it working?” You laugh and push him off. “No.” 

“So there is something between you and Azriel. I bet he’s clueless. I’ve seen it time and again.” You keep nursing your glass. “I wouldn’t say he’s clueless. But you know how this job is. One second you’re here and the next… I think we both agree that it’s better if we don’t cross that line with each other.” 

“But you could cross that line with me.” He winks. “No, Dean. I don’t think I could.”

 He straightens away from you and sips his beer. “You said you met my dad?” 

“Oh, yes. It was years ago, I was a freshman in college and a vengeful spirit was wreaking havoc on the campus. John showed up right before the son of a bitch gutted me. After that it was hard to go back to classes, you know?” 

“And how did you meet Azriel?” 

“Az and I met in a bar like this one, he had been hunting with his friends for a while and I hustled them for gas money.” 

“You play pool?” You shake your head and try to keep a straight face as you say “I play fools, Dean.” 

When Azriel and Sam returned, he did not like what he saw. In truth, he was glad to see you were having fun but he hated seeing you having fun with someone else. It's not like he could complain. You both refused to cross that line. Sleeping next to each other every night, on different beds was not the whirlwind romance he wanted to give you. It wasn’t the life you deserved. But he stuck by your side because everytime he wanted to slow down, to stop, maybe go back to school, you refused. “There are monsters, Az and we save people. I can’t go back to sitting in a classroom only to end up working in an office.” He wanted domesticity. He wanted a routine. He wanted a lawn to mow and to barbecue on weekends. But more than that he wanted you. 

“She’s a keeper, Az.” Dean joked as you sunk the last ball in the socket. Azriel clenched his jaw, not liking the familiarity with which Dean nudged your shoulder. It had only been a day since you met and you were acting like you’d known each other for years. 

“You don’t have to sleep here if you don’t want to.” Your face scrunches in confusion at his tone. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I’m sure you'd rather be with Dean right now.” 

“Azriel, don't be like that.” He shrugs “just saying, you two were making eyes at each other all day.” 

“We were not.” He doesn’t say anything else but there’s a tension that lingers. “I hate when you do this.” 

“I’m not doing anything.” 

“You’re picking a fight. You know I would never be with anyone else.” 

“You could.” 

“I don’t want to.” 

“Y/n-”

“I know Az, “the life’s too dangerous,” “we’d be more vulnerable,” “it just gives the bad guys ammunition.” I know the whole song and dance of why we can’t… I get it. But it makes me feel stupid when I could be out with someone who actually shows interest in me but I stay with you.” 

“I’m not holding you hostage, you can go if you want.” 

“You’re an idiot.” With a huff you storm out of the room. Not entirely sure where you’re going, you wander around the motel grounds for a while. Knocking on Dean’s door was an option, but you wanted to be alone. He was infuriating. Azriel knows which buttons to push and when. He does this every so often, picks a fight to create iciness between you. It makes temptation easier if you’re too mad at each other to give in, you suppose. 

It's past midnight, and the lights in room 9 are off. In your haste you forgot a key. You go to the lobby and are surprised to see an attendant. “Hi, I locked myself out of my room and my partner is asleep. Do you have a spare key by any chance?” 

“Of course, name and room number?” 

A click sounds from behind and you turn to see a man, turning the Open sign to Closed.  His neck is covered in scruff and bite marks. You look back at the attendant. The ledger, that weighs at least ten pounds, slams across your face. 

You wake up tied up and breathless in a windowless room. Six bloodied bodies surrounding you.