#straight kristen

[autismvampyre]

if fig leaves after junior year to travel with ayda i think emily axfords new character should be kristen 2

[ghostlyeris]

the kristen two subplot is truly off the fucking walls

[cntbtchthevapegod]

RIP K2

[the-solitary-child]

k2. the things you could have done.

you had just gotten gotten into hudol, and sure it was no adventuring academy but you worked hard to get in. did you stay up (partly because you have never been able to take a long rest) to study for that entrance exam? did kristen put her hands on you shoulders, casting bless on you as a gentle reassurase that you were going to do great on the exam, and you did. you got in. a clone in a prestigious college full of wizards and sorcerers, a cleric surrounded by nothing religious. did you start feeling homesick already, knowing you were going to be gone from your creator, from the reason you exist and her friends?

you started making friends of your own, forging your own identity as you did. then you started feeling sick and you thought “shit i might be pregnant.” every test you try and take comes out positive, and despite the anxiety and uncertainty of the future you go to a party because your possible baby daddy might be there aswell as all of his friends. you go and be supportive, the boat gets rocked and takes to the skies, and you climb up on deck, watching the corrupted cloud form of your goddess. you watch your source of origin struggle to make a connection, struggle to save you all..so you step forward.

“blimey”

the word falls on deaf ears, and you pull your shoulders back in confidence. you can do this.

“did you not hear me? i said BLIMEY.”

you are destroyed. the possibilities of your future destroyed, but you saved them. your friends…but were they really your friends.

rip k2.

[ratcowboy69]

crazy that adaine abernant, eleven oracle, could not get into hudol, yet Bloke Mode Kristen got in after being alive for at most??? a couple weeks???

[kenniex2]

quick shoutout to british kristen white girl twerking on these hoes

[adaines-furious-fan]

I don't think I ever want context for straight Kristen

[wormtime123]

what i've done for pride this month target audience: me. ft. kristen on a queer mission and a gaggle of sapphics + their favorite aroace little guy

[bacchuschucklefuck]

class swap design masterpost for convenience (from top to bottom: bard!riz, cleric!gorgug, sorcerer!kristen, barbarian!fig, artificer!adaine, and rogue!fabian)

[box-dwelling]

Ally: *says K2 is quitting vaping*

Me: oh lmao what a coincidence I just got patches to stop yesterday and I'm starting tomorrow. I'm doing it for you K2

Brennan: *announces that K2 is real now. A real human woman living in England in our world with the memories of Kristen's life except happening in England*

Me, an English lesbian ex fundamentalist cult survivor who lost their faith in their early teens after their first real interaction with death: Blimey...

[wolfziedraws]

Alter Emos

[spinaholi]

the way kristen 2 is just british male-gaze kristen

[ghostlyeris]

as fun as it is to dunk on the k2 moment, there is something so poetic about her being the one to reach cassandra

you are a clone. a copy. a simulacrum of a person who's only been alive for a few days. you're hanging out with your friends (who aren't really your friends) at fabian's birthday/your (her) election party. and suddenly you're thrust into mortal danger by your god (who isn't really your god at all)

you're there, helping load the cannons and fire at dragons, but everyone is talking to her. even as you race upstairs to help, gorgug speaks to her, even when you're right there. and through the wind and the waves, you watch kristen reach out to perform a miracle once again

and she fails

of course she fails. she's reaching out to cassandra, her goddess of mystery and doubt. but this storm isn't cassandra. cassandra sits tucked away in kristen's jeans, protected by her last true cleric in spyre

this isn't cassandra though. this is the nightmare king. a corrupted copy of the god kristen worships. saint kristen applebees, soon-to-be student body president and star cleric of the bad kids could never hope to reach him

but you could. clone to clone, copy to copy, corruption to corruption. you reach out, asking for divine intervention. and as you begin to feel it work, your divine prayer answered by a corrupted god, all you say is "blimey"

[cntbtchthevapegod]

Kristen and K2 really went through it this ep

[the-solitary-child]

i love straight british kristen 2 so much she should be name Christine. PLEASE. it would be so funny.

[feelingtheaster99]

Heartbreaking to see Kristen witness her younger brother being bullied by their parents and just having to acknowledge that she was her brothers’ shield and and she LEFT them